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Of course out of all the people I am the only one who is sulking at a random table. Why did I even go to this party in the first place? Sure I am champion at the moment, but there is any other place I would rather be than watching what I will never be able to have.
We started out as fuck buddies for when she could not give him enough. That quickly changed though as for we both ended up having feelings for each other, but he was not willing to end it with her since they have had a long history together. I am his little secret and it is driving me insane. I am too stubborn to let him go though. So here I am watching him dance with his actual girlfriend while she is leaning her head in his shoulder as I have no one at the moment.
Looking down at my drink I swirl the straw a little bit before down the whiskey as it burns in my throat. As long as it will make the loneliness go away I will do anything. I push my chair away from the table slowly before getting up not even bothering to button up my suit since I am done trying to impress people tonight.
As I made my way to the bar a I feel a hand on my shoulder to see Paige with her eyebrows furrowed. She was wearing a beautiful black dress that fit her nicely, but just about everything does. "Hey, love." I said putting on a fake smile.
"Seth, are you okay?" Rubbing my shoulder trying to comfort me. It doesn't help though, I feel worthless at the moment because he is laughing over there with her while I am standing here as a pawn in his little game.
"I will be." I said getting the other whiskey in my grasp debating on just downing it all right here then asking for another one. "How about we go dance or something?" Wrapping an arm around my waist.
Paige is one of the people I became close to when I entered the WWE. It all stared in FCW when we had the storyline together and she was one of the only people who knew about him and myself being an item.
"How can I say no to you?" I then take a swing of my drink before grabbing her hand as we go out on the dance floor. Looking over I looked over to see Nikki and John sharing a dance as well. I just wish I could be in that position. I crave to be them right now, with the person who makes me feel vulnerable yet on cloud nine every time we kiss.
I put my hand on her waist as we sway to the music as for they slowed the music down a little for the many couples. I need to stop. I need to think about just dancing with Paige and not on how that should be him and me.
"Oh come on, put a smile on your face even if you don't feel like it." I was told as Paige twirled herself. I decided to put a fake smile on, but it was a smile none the less.
"You better be glad I love you cause if it was anyone else I would not be doing this." I then put my hand up twirling her around some more before she looses her balance a little bit crashing into my chest. Paige is probably the best person in the whole world being my rock at the moment.
After a few more songs I decided that it was time to sit down, but as I was leaving the floor I just had to look over at him. While he still had his arms wrapped around her when they should be around me instead.
Letting out a frustrated groan, I went back to the bar to grab my whiskey that I forgot earlier.
Just seeing that pissed me off even more than before. It just had to be him who my eyes landed on. Why couldn't it be anyone else except him. It feels like walls are closing in and I can't breathe.
"Fuck. " I mumble looking down trying not to cry. Not bothering to bring my head up, I go back to the table where a few of my companions are chatting amongst themselves. I did not want to talk though, I wanted to go back to the hotel or gym or anywhere else.
Out of everyone I could have loved I went to him, why him though? Sure his cute smile and the rasp in his voice that gets me everytime. His perfect eyes that I could stare into for the rest of my life or the way he walks with a little side step. I could have someone better though, someone who does not make me hide us. Yet there is no one better because he is perfect.
I need some air or else I might suffocate from my own thoughts. Getting up I walk to the bathroom that was free from the loud music and people who want to have pointless conversations with you.
Making my way through the place once I go to the bathroom I walk up to the sinks leaning my hands on it looking up in the mirror. Letting out a sigh I turn on the water leaning down splashing some on my face hoping it will make me realize or something to that affect.
I heard the door open, but I just did not have the effort look up at the person entering. I should of though because to my suprise I was being dragged to one of the stalls in there.
"You in that suit princess is driving me nuts." He whispered in my ear as we were chest to chest. He looked handsome as well even though suits were not really his thing at all.
"You as well Ambrose." With a smirk plastered on my face as a boost of confidence. He just let out a small smile putting his hand on my cheek rubbing his thumb over my scruff.
I was the one who made the first move by bringing my lips softly against his while putting an arm around his waist. Dean was like a drug and I did not mind being intoxicated by him. As he slipped his tongue in my mouth though I tasted something that was different. It was not the alcohol, but it tasted like flavored lipgloss.
It just reminds me why I went into the bathroom in the first place. Backing away from him I just shake my head. I can't do this tonight, I can't kiss him knowing that he will just go back to Renee later that night.
"Why did you do that?" With furrowed eyebrows and a puzzled expression on his face.
"Not tonight Dean." I replied then kissed his cheek before getting out of his embrace and unlocking the stall walking out. I love Dean, but loving him is like slowly taking a knife to the heart and soul.
"Seth come back." I heard him beg, but I just ignore it as for my own safety I need to keep looking forward. Not taking a look back I go on since if I did I would go crawling back.
I am done with this party so I went to the elevator pressing the button to the bottom floor. There was the slight hope that he would chase after me and proclaim his love for me, but knowing him our little secret could not be revealed. Not until he was ready for it at least.