Chapter Text
November 2000
Pearl leaned against the wall of the kitchen. The fraternity house was packed. She lamented that her roommate Peridot convinced her to go to this. The tiled linoleum floor was peeling and everything seemed...sticky. She did not want to be here.
The song, “Steal My Sunshine,” was playing in the background and Pearl cursed the existence of top forty radio.
“We have to network with these d-bags,” Peridot said. “How are we supposed to start an engineering firm someday if we become social outcasts and never meet any other engineering majors?”
“I was planning on networking after I graduate next year and get a job,” Pearl said. “It’s more preferable than going to some fraternity party only because a handful of the guys there happen to be in our major.”
“If more women did STEM, we wouldn’t have to be here,” Peridot said.
“Please get off your soapbox,” Pearl said.
“If no one ever got on a soapbox, protests wouldn’t exist. Nothing would ever change,” Peridot said. “Sometimes, I don’t understand why you’re so placated by the status quo.”
Peridot spotted someone from her electrical engineering class. She asked Pearl if she wanted to go and talk to the guy whose name was Rob or Ralph or something like that.
“I’m good,” Pearl said. As Peridot walked away, Pearl took a small sip of her beer and crinkled her nose. She hated Bud Light. As she choked down the beverage, Pearl spotted Diana Martin.
Over the speakers, Pearl heard the lyrics to the song:
I know it's up for me
If you steal my sunshine
Making sure I'm not in too deep
If you steal my sunshine
Keeping versed and on my feet
Check, c'mere c'mere, c'mere
Wow, look at her
I know
Pearl’s eyes focused on Diana’s revealing and lacy halter top. Diana’s bare skin peaked through the end of her white halter top and beginning of her silver metallic pants. A good looking, tall guy had his arms around her waist as they danced together. Diana noticed Pearl and waved with a small smile. She stopped dancing with the guy, took him by the hand, and walked over to Pearl.
“Pearl?!” Diana’s eyes widened as she tried to hide a smile. “What the hell are you doing here? You go to these things?”
“Not usually,” Pearl said as she played with the string on the pocket of her baggy cargo pants. “My roommate dragged me here.”
“Yeah, I didn’t think you would come to something like this voluntarily,” Diana said.
“Why? Do you hate having fun?” the guy asked Pearl.
“No, she doesn’t hate having fun. She just has a different definition of fun,” Diana said, smirking. “Derek, this is Pearl.”
Derek looked at Diana blankly. He had no idea what she was talking about.
“My calculus tutor,” Diana said, pursing her lips. “She’s an engineering major. So she knows her shit.”
“Di, you’re taking calculus?” Derek asked. “Why would you do that to yourself?” He kissed Diana’s neck.
“It’s a requirement for my accounting major,” Diana said.
“You should, try an easier major,” Derek said.
“He doesn’t understand, Pearl. He’s a comm major,” Diana said. “He’s doing a research paper on the X-Files and its effect on the US political culture pre-George W. Bush.” Diana rolled her eyes in annoyance.
Then a Tupac song began to play. “It’s me and my boys’ song! Be right back!” Derek said. He let Diana go from his embrace and ran over to a bunch of guys near the keg.
“I’m going to go to the bathroom,” Diana said, winking at Pearl.
As Pearl watched Diana go upstairs, she leaned her back harder against the wall. She would not allow herself to leave this wall. She wasn’t going to subject herself to this any longer. Perhaps she would fuse to the wall and would not have to make a decision about going after Diana.
Diana had hired Pearl to tutor her in calculus. One day while Pearl was sitting in the lecture hall, this gorgeous blonde girl wearing a white dress who was sitting in the row behind her, leaned forward, tapped Pearl on the shoulder and said, gesturing to the ninety-seven on Pearl’s calculus quiz, “You’re good at this, huh? You think you could help me get good at this?”
After the second tutoring session it became clear that Diana did not need help with calculus. Pearl decided to wear a dress that day and Diana put her hand on Pearl’s bare leg. “I don’t really need help with calculus,” Diana whispered. Ever since then they had been secretly hooking up while the rest of Diana’s sorority house thought she was learning about limits. In a way she was, just not in the mathematical way.
That day Pearl became a story Diana would tell her husband twenty years from now when their marriage was on the rocks and their sex-life needed something to get off on.
When no one seemed to be paying attention as they pitifully, drunkenly, offensively rapped to 2pac, Pearl took a long sip of her beer and went upstairs.
As she ascended to the second floor, Pearl heard 2pac sing:
Come with me, Hail Mary
Run quick see, what do we have here
Now, do you want to ride or die
La dadada, la la la la
I ain't a killer but don't push me
Revenge is like the sweetest joy next to gettin' pussy
Picture paragraphs unloaded, wise words bein' quoted
Peeped the weakness int he rap game and sewed it
In the bathroom, Diana had Pearl up against the bathroom sink, kissing her. Pearl’s back dug into the sharp porcelain edges, but she didn’t care. “I’m so glad I ran into you,” Diana said.
Pearl played with a strand of Diana’s golden hair. “Me too. I usually hate these things.”
“Too many people?”
“These frat houses are filthy.” Pearl nudged her head over to the shower, which appeared to have black mold in the tile cracks. “And they have atrocious beer that’s probably roofied.”
“They don’t roofie the beer,” Diana said with a serious tone. “It’s that jungle juice stuff in the trash barrel. Stay away from that.” She began to kiss Pearl’s collar bone. Pearl moaned as Diana lifted up Pearl’s shirt. Her soft hands moved up Pearl’s stomach and pulled away Pearl’s bra cup so she could suck on Pearl’s nipple. Pearl grasped the back of Diana’s head, feeling her soft blond hair, and gently pushed Diana’s head toward her chest. When Pearl felt Diana's teeth lightly bite her nipple, she let out a squeak.
“I wanna see your dorm room,” Diana said as she pulled away.
Pearl allowed herself a small smile. She promised herself not to let this happen. She was becoming too attached and there was no way this would end well. Diana had a boyfriend. She didn’t date girls.
“What about Derek?” Pearl asked.
“Derek?” Diana rolled her eyes. “He doesn’t know about this and honestly if he did, he probably wouldn’t care.”
“Really? What? Why?” Pearl asked, confused.
“I don’t want to offend you,” Diana said brushing a strand of Pearl’s strawberry blonde hair away from her face. She pecked Pearl on the lips.
Pearl looked down on the floor and said, “He doesn’t think this, ‘counts,’ does he?”
Diana sighed, “That’s why I didn’t want to get into this. Derek is an asshole, okay?”
“Then why are you with him?”
“He’s hot, Pearl. Okay? It’s college. I’m not going to marry him or anything,” Diana said. She dug her thigh into Pearl’s groin and said,“Look, baby. You’re so fucking gorgeous and I really want to see your room.” She then whispered in Pearl’s ear, “Don’t you want to show me?” Pearl got goosebumps as she shivered from Diana’s hot breath on her skin.
“Yeah,” Pearl said.
“Alright. Wait in here for ten minutes and meet me down the block. You know what my car looks like, right? It’s a tan Camry.”
“Meet you down the block?”
“We can’t let people see us leaving here together,” Diana said, breaking the embrace.
“You want me to wait in this gross bathroom?” Pearl asked.
“It’s ten minutes,” Diana said. She pecked Pearl on the lips and said, “I can’t wait to fuck you.”
Diana left the bathroom and Pearl buried her face in her hands. She turned around and put her hands on the side of the porcelain counter and looked down at the sink. “You don’t have to go,” Pearl said to herself. “I know you want to go, but you don’t have to.”
Pearl timed ten minutes with her watch, her eyes not leaving her wrist. Pearl was about to leave the bathroom when a pink-haired girl rushed in without knocking. “I am so sorry!” she said, closing the door. “Just do me one favor...”
“What the hell?” Pearl said as she cursed Diana for not locking the door when she left.
“Rose!” a male voice in the hallway yelled. He sounded like he was sobbing.
The pink-haired woman put her index finger to her lips and then put her hands together like she was praying. “Please,” she mouthed before manically putting her index finger to her mouth again.
Pearl nodded, understanding the girl wanted Pearl to be quiet.
“Please, Rose!” the male voice said through the bathroom door. “I love you!”
Pearl looked at the girl in front of her. She wore a short, dark pink baby-doll dress and a jean jacket. She sat on the toilet seat cover, rubbing the temples of her forehead.
“Rose? Are you up here? I just want to talk!” Pearl then heard loud sobbing from a man standing outside the bathroom door.
The pink-haired woman cringed and mouthed, “Damn-it.”
They heard loud steps going down stairs.
“Thank you,” the woman said. “Can we wait like two minutes? Just to be safe that he’s gone?”
“I take it you’re Rose,” Pearl said, crossing her arms.
“It’s a long story,” Rose sighed. “I’ve been trying to break-up with him for two weeks. He just keeps wanting to talk about it.”
“Why’d you break up with him, well besides--”
“The obvious reasons of him being ridiculously needy?” Rose asked. “Isaac wanted to marry me. He bought a ring and everything. I was like, ‘hey,’” Rose waved her hands in front of Pearl’s face. “‘We’re twenty-two. I’m not going to marry you. I am not ready for all of that.”
Pearl nodded. “So you’re a senior?” she asked. Pearl wanted to deflect the conversation away from relationships.
“Yeah,” Rose said.
“What are your--”
“Don’t ask me what my plans for next year are,” Rose said, suddenly serious.
“O-kay,” Pearl said, rolling her eyes.
“I don’t have any,” Rose said, beaming.
Pearl smiled and noticed the dusting of freckles across Rose’s nose. She was cute and carefree and, as Pearl predicted, probably not into Pearl.
“You think the coast is clear?” Pearl asked, raising her eyebrows at Rose. “Cause I kinda have to go. You know, because of my ride and stuff.”
“You going to a booty call?” Rose asked, laughing.
“What?” Pearl said, offended.
“You were flushed and you were staring at the sink when I came in here,” Rose said. “I’m pretty bad at math, but I can put two and two together.”
Pearl’s mouth hung open as she tried to find the words to respond to this pink-haired Rose who stood in front of her.
“What are you doing standing here?” Rose asked, “Go get that D, girl!”
Pearl didn’t feel like explaining to this Rose character that it was a V and not a D. She muttered goodbye and exited the bathroom.
Pearl walked across the lawn littered with beer cans and vomit. She should have stayed home and have read Ethan Frome for the seventh time while listening to Sonic Youth on her walkman.
When Pearl made it down the street, she saw the tan Camry parked next to the curb. She walked over to the passenger seat and planned to knock on the passenger window. Instead she saw Derek sitting in the passenger seat, waving to Pearl. He rolled down the window and said, “Calculus, girl! Wazzzuuup!”
Pearl dipped her head back. Of course Derek was here.
“Hey,” Diana said with a weak smile. “Don’t worry. I’m just dropping him off at his dorm.”
“He doesn’t live in the frat house?” Pearl asked.
“Why would I wanna live there?” Derek asked. “It’s mad gross in there. The floor is sticky. Did you notice that?”
“You know what?” Pearl said, “I understand Derek is intoxicated right now and this is the safest way to get him back to his dorm, but yeah, I am not doing this anymore. Okay? I will call a cab.”
“No, Pearl!” Diana said. She got out of the driver’s seat, taking the keys with her and ran up to Pearl, taking her in an embrace. “He’s too drunk and too oblivious to even know what’s going on between me and you.”
“I don’t like how this--”
“Pearl,” Diana smiled, “He’s been suggesting all night that he wants to set you up with his friend Bill because you’re and I quote, ‘mad cute and Bill’s type’ and you’re both political science majors. That’s how oblivious he is.” She played with the drawstring on Pearl’s cargo pants pockets. “He can’t even remember what your major is.”
“He thinks I’m ‘mad cute’?” Pearl asked. Her brow furrowed. Derek thinking she was cute was just...odd.
Diana nodded. “I mean, you are.”
Pearl’s lips curled into a smile. She sighed and then nodded to Diana, defeated.
After they dropped the intoxicated Derek off, Pearl moved up to the front seat. Diana took her hand, holding it as she drove. For the first time, to Pearl, this relationship felt somewhat normal, despite just minutes before they had watched Derek stumble into his dorm building.
Pearl led Diana by the hand up to her building. When she opened the door to her dorm, Peridot, Garnet, Jasper were playing Golden Eye on the Nintendo 64.
“Pearl! You’re alive!” Peridot said. “You disappeared! Where did you go--oh you have a girl with you.”
Pearl looked down at the floor. Even though Garnet was wearing sunglasses, Pearl could tell she was giving her the death stare. Garnet had been telling her for weeks to stop seeing Diana. “Diana, this is Garnet, Peridot, and Jasper.”
“Hi,” Diana meekly waved with wide eyes.
Peridot put down the controller and stood up. “I don’t know about you guys, But I think we should go and get high--in Jasper’s room.”
“In my room?” Jasper asked. She looked at Diana and then at Pearl. “I don’t have a N64 though.”
“Yeah,” Peridot said, “but you have a better sound system. You also have better weed.”
“That’s true,” Jasper nodded.
As Jasper and Peridot stood up, Garnet walked up to Diana and said, with her British accent, “I know what you’re doing,” she said.
“I don’t know what you mean,” Diana said. She crinkled her forehead and attempted to not laugh nervously.
“Garnet, seriously?” Pearl said through gritted teeth.
“Come one, Garnet!” Peridot said, pushing Garnet away from Diana.
When the group left, Pearl locked her dorm room door. She paced back and forth, mortified. “They usually don’t hang out in here,” Pearl said, “I swear to god, Peridot is usually not even in here. She’s always with Jasper.”
Diana took out some lip smacker lipgloss from her pocket and applied it to her lips. She looked around Pearl’s room, judging the Buffy The Vampire Slayer poster next to a framed poster of Sleater-Kinney. “It’s okay.” Diana saw Pearl’s electric piano keyboard next to the bed. She played a few keys as she gave Pearl a sly expression, biting her lip. Diana nodded and then sat down on Pearl’s bed. “So this is your room.”
“Yes,” Pearl said. “This is it.”
“What’s Sleater-Kinney? Some obscure movie?”
“They’re a band.”
“Never heard of them.” Diana opened her legs wide and leaned forward. “Now, are you going to take those fucking horrible cargo pants off or am I going to have to do it for you?”
Pearl blushed and started to take her pants off. She rushed and felt completely un-sexy as she fidgeted to remove her pants. She walked over to Diana and stood between her legs. Diana’s hands grasped Pearl’s hips.
Pearl’s heart raced. She needed to end this. This was not the night though.