Chapter 1: Re:Start
Chapter Text
The first time it happened he didn’t even realize, but perhaps he should have. Perhaps it was obvious, but to him, the possibility seemed so out of reach, so far fetched, that he dismissed it without a second thought.
A vivid nightmare. That’s all it was—all he thought it was, convinced himself it was. A very eerie, surprisingly accurate and all too real nightmare, but a nightmare nonetheless. For to Izuku’s mind, that explanation was more plausible (preferable) to the current reality.
On one hand, he couldn't blame himself for not realizing sooner. On the other, he wanted to punch himself for his stupidity, for not seeing something that in hindsight was so obvious. But whatever he may think or do, in the end, it didn’t even matter. It wouldn’t change anything. All he could do was to bite the bullet and endure it.
It was all he could ever do. All he can do.
All he will do.
Over and over, until he was littered with holes and his body stops functioning altogether. And then, he would get up, just so he could do it all over again.
Midoriya Izuku always wished he was born with a quirk. When he was told at the young age of four that he would, most likely, never develop one, it marked the moment he tasted true despair for the first time. But now, looking back, he started to think it had all been a mistake. That perhaps living a life of crushed dreams would have been preferable over the world granting him his wish in what he thought must be the cruelest way possible.
He quickly chides himself for his selfish thoughts. This was just the burden he had to bear. Many realities had been set before him, each more horrific than the last. Izuku had lived them all, and he wept. But with this power he could create a different future, a new outcome. Something better.
And while Izuku was the only one left with the knowledge of a world in shambles, his classmates, his friends, everyone else… they would all be free to continue living their carefree lives, unburdened by their ignorance.
What did it matter if Izuku broke again and again? If it meant they could be saved, he had no choice but to comply. What did it matter, when it would all reset anyways?
For them, he would take whatever the world threw at him, again and again. He would cry, so they could laugh. He would break, so they could heal. He would die, so they could live.
...he just wished it could have been different. For his quirk, he would trade in a heartbeat, if only it meant he could finally stop pretending to be a hero.
His eyelids fluttered close, heavy with fatigue and red with tears. His final breath, ragged and hoarse from his screaming, left his lips in a tired puff and his broken chest settled with a shudder. The world dimmed. Grew dark. Black. Izuku let it happen, having long since learned to stop struggling.
His beating heart still tried to fight it, refusing to give up as easily as it’s master. But with each pathetic thump it only grew slower and slower, until it—in a last ditch effort—gave one final, weak thump in a desperate (but ultimately pointless) attempt at survival. And then, finally… it was over.
Izuku lay still. Lifeless.
And then he awoke.
Chapter 2: The End of the Beginning
Summary:
First times.
Re:Load
Chapter Text
The first time he experienced his quirk he had been wandering home from school, completely oblivious of the horrors yet to come—but he didn’t realize what had happened until the second.
It had been one of the worst days of his life, and it was only about to get worse. His childhood friend (former childhood friend, he reminded himself) Kacchan had ruined one of his beloved Quirk Analysis notebooks, before advising him to go jump off a roof, in hopes of being born with a quirk in his next life.
If only he knew.
It all happened so fast. One second, he was wandering alone through an empty underpass, fighting to stay positive and to keep his fragile dreams alive. Before he even realized, he found himself in the grasp of a villain—dark green and slimy, smelling of sewage.
“I’ll be borrowing your body for a while,” it whispered in his ear, forcing it’s liquid form down his unwilling nose and throat. “This will only hurt for a second.”
His lungs burned. He cried, clawed uselessly at whatever he could reach, and would have begged for his life, if only he could. But his muffled pleas fell on deaf ears, his struggles ignored.
He screamed in his mind; for a hero, for anyone, someone. He screamed, for mercy, screamed, for help that never came.
A hero.
A hero.
A hero.
...but no hero ever came. No one came to help the poor boy, fourteen years old, struggling for breath as his life was slowly choked out from him.
Midoriya Izuku died that day. He died, alone, afraid, and with tears streaking down his face.
But it wouldn’t be the last.
Some parts of him wonders whatever happened to that Izuku. Would that world continue on without him? Was the current Izuku the same boy whose life was extinguished before he even finished middle school, or was he just an impostor, carrying his memories?
He hoped not. He couldn’t bear to imagine the look on his mother’s face when she was informed of his untimely demise. That is, if she ever was.
He awoke to the sight of his ruined notebook, floating uselessly in the koi pond in front of his school. He blinked owlishly, still shaken and confused from what he quickly assumed to be just a terrible dream. It had been the only logical explanation he could think of.
But this time when he arrived at the lonesome underpass he saw in his nightmare, he hesitated. He lingered by the entrance, heart clouded in doubt and paralyzing fear. But in the end, he still stepped through the tunnel, wary of his surroundings as he was, jumping at every shadow and the tiniest of sound.
When the villain appeared, he found himself rooted to the spot. There was shock, because the villain looked just the same as his nightmare. Shock, because there was no way, it was impossible, it couldn’t—
For a moment, he was convinced he would die. That his dream was some sort of warning, and like the idiot he was, he refused to listen.
But this dream had a different ending. Instead of being suffocated to death, he was saved. Rescued by a hero, the hero. All it needed were a few extra seconds, a few moments of hesitation that Izuku never gave in the past, to change his future. This time, All Might would save him.
He would live.
And in his panic, of all that happened and of finally meeting his idol, he would forget all about the dream. For at the moment there was something more important on his mind, nightmares foretelling his gruesome death be damned.
He grabbed onto his hero’s leg, refusing to let go, only concerned with his own selfish desires. He needed an answer. He needed confirmation that his dreams were possible, that all the torture and ridicule he went through on a daily basis for his impossible goal wasn’t all in vain.
“Can someone quirkless like me become a hero too?”
He would never forget the look of pity on All Might’s face in that moment. He would never forget when his hero seemingly and suddenly deflated in a puff of smoke, only leaving the emaciated skeleton of a man behind.
Izuku was bewildered, denying vehemently to the high heavens that this was All Might! That the unbreakable Symbol of Peace was little more than a carefully crafted and fragile lie, that with only the tiniest of mistakes could be shattered like glass, only to be carried away in the wind in the form of a million tiny crystal shards.
But the hero just sighed and shook his head. That day, Izuku found out All Might’s secret. He saw the wound that was killing the hero slowly, left behind by a villain so many years ago, like spider cracks upon sickly pale flesh.
That day, All Might told him the words he had dreaded hearing, but deep inside always knew to be true. “No”. No, Izuku could not become a hero. Not without a quirk. Not without power.
His hero left, and Izuku didn’t know what to do. Now that the only person that was important, the only one who mattered had confirmed his fears, confirmed that Izuku was, and always would be, just as useless as everyone always told him. His childhood friend’s words replayed in his mind, taunting him. “If you want a quirk so badly…”
But his dark thoughts were interrupted and left for another day by a sudden, and very loud, BANG in the distance, reverberating throughout the streets and invading his ears.
An explosion.
A villain.
Slime.
My fault.
Kacchan!
His selfish actions, wasting All Might’s time with a pointless question he already knew the answer to, had allowed the villain made of sludge to escape, and now it had found a new target to torment.
Instead of a boy with emerald eyes and deep green curls, this one sported an all too familiar set of fiery red irises and ashen blonde strands. They met Izuku’s, those pleading eyes, begging.
“I don’t want to die!”
He didn’t think.
He acted.
With all the knowledge he’d accumulated throughout his fourteen years of life, he fought; fought as hard as he could in a desperate attempt to save, but in the end, the one who needed saving was him. Again. By the same hero and idol who’d crushed his dreams once and for all—
No. Not crushed. Izuku already knew. All Might just made him see the truth he refused to see. Again, he had to be saved by someone else, because he was too powerless to help anyone, least of all himself.
But he didn’t regret it. Seeing his childhood friend, his bully, look at him with such pleading eyes—
It hadn’t been a choice. Izuku moved before he could even process what was happening.
Even afterwards, as he was scolded by other heroes for his reckless actions, he did not regret it. And when Kacchan later approached him only to growl in his face, telling him he refused to be thankful, to thank him, Izuku just smiled. He wasn’t looking for gratitude or recognition, he was just glad Kacchan was still there to throw insults and curses at him.
And when All Might found him after that, when he told him those five words that would change his life forever, he cried.
“You can be a hero.”
Tears ran down freckled cheeks and he tried to choke down his heaving sobs.
“You shall inherit my power.”
Wide, confused eyes stared up at the blonde hero.
“With it, you shall become the next Symbol of Peace.”
All Might gazed down on him. He smiled, and the sun shining from behind lit up his contours, casting the hero in a holy glow. Izuku took a sharp breath, because in that moment, he thought he was looking at an angel.
Chapter 3: Discovery; Fear; Relief
Summary:
Izuku makes a discovery.
Notes:
Edited the old chapters a bit because I realized I messed up the formatting. :/
Chapter Text
The second time. The second time he noticed. He noticed, and the realization hit him like a head on collision on a busy highway.
I have a quirk.
Not the one given to him by All Might, passed on to him after ten months of grueling training that transformed his scrawny and soft body into hard muscle. This one, he was born with. This one, he had from the very start. And he thought—
I lied to All Might.
Of course, it hadn’t been intentional. And realistically, he knew—knew that All Might didn’t choose him for his lack of quirk, but for his spirit, the spirit of a hero. But that didn’t stop the guilt, telling him he’d done something wrong, eating him inside out.
But next to that, next to the guilt and shame, was excitement. Happiness. Because—
I have a quirk!
They had all been wrong: mom, Kacchan, his classmates, the doctor…
“Frankly, I’m not sure what is wrong,” the doctor sighed. “My first guess was that your son is one of the unlucky few born quirkless, but none of the test we’ve performed indicates that that is the case. By all means, he should have a quirk by now.
“It’s possible your son’s quirk is just too weak to be noticeable, but for now, we just have to assume he’s quirkless. I would recommend a quirk therapist in the possible scenario that Midoriya-chan does have a quirk, but haven’t figured out how to activate it. It’s rare, but possible with quirks requiring very specific conditions to be activated.”
The therapist didn’t help. Nothing they made him do had any noticeable effect, and by the end of it, they decided to just write him off as quirkless. But now… of course nothing had worked. Despite all the odd little exercises they had him do, there was one thing they could never ask of him. A trigger so specific, there was no way Izuku could have ever discovered it on his own.
Death.
The third emotion, after his initial guilt and excitement, was dawning terror.
I have to save that girl!
The second time Izuku died, it was during the U.A. entrance exam when he fell to his death after failing to save a kind girl from getting crushed by a giant robot. She helped him beforehand, when he was about to embarrassingly fall flat on his face strolling up the road to U.A., preparing to enter the famous hero academy for the first time. With her quirk, she floated him gently to safety, and he had let her die!
The robots were part of the practical exam. Most of them were small, manageable, worth only a few points each, ranging from the one pointers to the more dangerous three pointers. The goal was to either destroy or disable them, but there was one last catch.
The zero pointer. A robot too dangerous to take on, and better avoided. An obstacle, rather than an enemy. Izuku really hadn’t been sure what to expect when the hero and U.A. teacher Present Mic explained it to them, but it wasn’t this. This wasn’t an obstacle, it was a monster!
He still charged at the terrifying behemoth head on, after unfreezing his legs left paralysed by fear and forcing them to move. Seeing what it did to that girl—he couldn’t just stand back. In fact, the terrible sight only spurred him on because he couldn’t let any of the other participants meet the same fate!
Without a second thought, he used the power bestowed on him by All Might to blow a hole straight through it’s head, ripping through metal and wire alike like paper.
His arm broke. His legs, infused with the same destructive power, had broken as well, after he used them to reach the head of the colossal robot to begin with. It was through an incredible jump that he aimed for the terrifying and merciless robotic visage, which would prove to be his downfall. Quite literally, in this case.
He fell, and belatedly realized that he didn’t know what to do! He never planned this far. In fact, he hadn’t planned at all! It was just like back with Kacchan and the sludge incident; he moved before he could even think.
With a wet, sickening splat and crack of broken bones and soft flesh exploding in a rain of nauseating red that left his shattered body even more mangled than it already was, he hit the ground. He was dead before the pain even registered.
And then he was back, which left him running around the exam grounds in a frantic search for the girl. This time he had to reach her in time, he had to!
In his panic, he completely forgot why he even came here in the first place. The other robots were forgotten, unimportant in the scheme of things. Right now, he wasn’t thinking about racking up enough points for U.A. to accept him; the only thing on his mind was the girl, because he knew his quirk had brought him back for a reason. And that reason was to save a life.
He found her, in the same spot as before, but this time she was still alive. There was still time. This time, he would save her.
Much like in the first timeline, he jumped. Perhaps he should have thought of a different approach, considering how last time ended, but nothing else popped into his mind at that moment. His priority was to make sure the girl was safe. What happened after wasn’t important.
He punched. The hulking beast fell, and he along with it.
He only had a fraction of a second to relax, knowing that the girl would live to see another day, before panic took hold of him once more. He was going to die, again , and this time he wasn’t sure if he would come back.
But like with All Might and the villain of sludge, Izuku’s choices gave this future a different outcome.
With a sharp slap, he came to a sudden stop, but it wasn’t because of the hard, unforgiving concrete ground. He was floating, and in the edges of his foggy vision (exhaustion, pain, fear, relief), he saw the kind girl, hand raised and teary eyed.
Ah… I was saved again… were his last thoughts, before darkness took over and he passed out.
He woke to a small and wrinkled lady standing over him, and though it took a few seconds, he soon identified her as Recovery Girl, U.A.’s own personal nurse and healer. She shook her head and tutted disapprovingly, scolding him for his reckless behavior, but Izuku couldn’t find it in him to regret his decision. The girl was alive, and that’s all he needed to know. His broken bones had been fixed and his swollen flesh returned to it’s original shape and color, the burning ache in his body long gone.
Everything would be fine.
Whether he got into U.A. or not, which he sincerely doubted, that girl was alive, breathing, and so was he.
Everything would be fine.
Chapter 4: The Beginning of Despair
Summary:
Calm before the storm.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Somehow he got accepted into U.A., despite what he thought was an extremely poor performance in the practical exam. Aside from the no pointer one, he destroyed a grand (and impressive, for all the wrong reasons) total of exactly zero robots. But for rescuing that girl, along with securing the safety of all other participants on the battleground, he was awarded sixty rescue points in return.
Karma does exist, he mused, a large grin splitting his freckled face in two as he approached the gates to U.A. for a second time, with hopefully many more to come. But this time it was not as a contestant, but as a student, his uniform worn proudly as proof of his achievement.
Studying at U.A. he would have no use of his quirk, his original quirk, for a long (yet not long enough) time to come. In fact, through all the excitement of finally attending the school of his dreams and being tutored by All Might himself, along with many other of his favorite heroes, he almost forgot about it. Pushed to the back of his mind, he smiled at the new friends (actual friends!) he made, passing his school days in bliss, with only a few hiccups here and there to break it up.
But he would receive a grim, grim reminder on the day that their homeroom teacher, Aizawa, took them for a school trip to the USJ.
The first death was himself—ripped in half with his intestines floating uselessly in too dark water, painted bright red through his blood. Out of all deaths so far, this was easily the most painful.
He didn’t die right away. It had been faster than choking to death on disgusting sewage slime, but there was something about watching your guts spill out of your body that made the whole experience so much more real. Suffocating was an experience waiting to be over, falling was too fast to register, but seeing his insides spilling out into the open had a finality to it. Aside from the excruciating pain, it left him with a feeling of absolute vulnerability and a promise that it was too late.
He screamed without sound, his lungs filling with water dyed crimson. It tasted like iron. Bitter, harsh and disgusting.
But worse than all that—than the pain, the fear, the blood, the absolute shock and terror —was the expression on Asui Tsuyu’s face.
It only lasted a second. The frog girl’s normally neutral expression twisted into something awful, black eyes filled with pure unadulterated horror, as she watched her classmate for barely a month bleed out in front of her. She did not even notice the villain approaching behind her.
He tried to scream once more, uselessly, reaching a shaking hand out in a desperate attempt to warn her, do something, but all that came out was silence and blood.
Then everything turned black. Midoriya Izuku was dead. But it was only one more death added to a list that would steadily grow, stretching far (too far) into the horizon.
At some point, he would grow used to it. But even as the fear of dying would slowly be erased and replaced with solemn acceptance, there was one thing he could never grow used to.
Dying he could handle; pain and fear little more than white noise to exhausted ears. But watching someone else die (you couldn’t do anything you worthless Deku, what kind of hero are you?) was something different entirely. It didn’t matter how many times it happened—every time was just as painful as the first. At least he didn’t have to look himself in the eyes as the burning fire called life faded in them, before finally being extinguished once and for all.
Except it wasn't once and for all, was it? Except it would happen again, and again, because Izuku was worthlessworthlessworthless. Except he would die, again, whether it’s because he was too weak, or so that he could erase, undo, fix the mistakes he made.
But this was something only he could do. This was his responsibility.
Notes:
Are you ready for the true suffering to begin? :)
Chapter Text
The second death was Todoroki Shouto.
Izuku’s eyes blinked open to the space hero, Number Thirteen, finishing his speech. Fear seized his heart in realization that there was nothing he could do to warn them of the incoming villain attack without attracting unwanted questions. Even if there was some way for him to convince everyone that they had to leave now, there wouldn’t be enough time. That only left him with one option: survive.
When the swirling villain of purple mist so dark it almost looked black warped them, Izuku had already changed his initial position. His intent was to evade the warp entirely, but seeing as he failed that, he ended up transported to the same district as the ice and fire user.
If Izuku hadn’t been there, Todoroki would have frozen every villain as soon as his feet touched the ground. But with the other boy there and in danger of being caught in the attack, he was a lot more constricted in how freely he could use his quirk.
In the end, as they were both overwhelmed by villains from all angles, Todoroki’s left side erupted in a roaring inferno as a last, desperate attempt to defend himself. So shocked the elemental user was, that he did not even notice the villain sneaking up behind him.
By the time Izuku’s warning shout left his lips, it was already too late.
Todoroki’s heterochromatic eyes were open wide with shock, staring without words at the sharpened pole that entered through his back, pierced his heart and thrust through his chest. He grasped the bloody end jutting out from between his ribs, just holding it, looking confused and unsure of what to do next.
His eyes met Izuku’s, mouth open in a silent plea. Tears slowly begun prickling the corners of his eyes as his dazed expression bled over into panic and dawning realization. The image of a fatally injured Todoroki falling bonelessly to his knees grew blurry as Izuku’s own salty tears mixed with the other’s.
I’m sorry, he mouthed, not daring to say it out loud and breaking the deafening silence. I’m sorry.
He knew what he had to do. Furiously, he wiped his eyes and took a deep breath to steady his beating heart, pounding so hard he thought he heard his ribs creaking. He glared up at the grinning villains through watery eyes and did his best to choke down his sobs and sniffles, threatening to break him.
He didn’t have to do much after that. He lacked the courage to take action into his own hands, but fortunately, he didn’t need to. Before the next minute was up, it was over.
Izuku’s body joined Todoroki's on the ground. His head landed somewhere else.
Hopefully on a villain, he thought, spitefully. That brought a faint smile to his face, so the first thing he did after resetting was to bellow out a hearty laugh. It gained him a few curious stares and a scowl from Kacchan, but at that point, Izuku couldn’t care less about something so trivial.
Notes:
I know there chapters are short, and I did consider making them longer, but decided against it. The reason is that this story is kinda a side project of mine beside my main fic. I haven't really gotten that far in this story. So while I could have just compiled these chapters into one part, that means that there would be a long time before the next chapter is posted. This way I can post one chapter every day. :) (Until I run out of material... >_>)
But yeah. I did decided to post two chapters today though, since these two were really short.
Chapter 6: False Hope
Summary:
Too late.
Chapter Text
Third death, not counting his own after Todoroki’s, was Aizawa Shouta.
Everything started out promising. Izuku managed to escape the mist, along with Number Thirteen, Uraraka, Iida, Shouji, Sato, Sero and Ashido. There were a few close calls; when Thirteen had his own quirk turned against him, Izuku reluctantly considered resetting. But despite the teacher’s disintegrated back, he stayed conscious and assured his students he would be fine. And once All Might showed up, a furious grimace twisting his face into something terrifying and so unlike his usual jovial smile, Izuku thought that finally, everything would be okay.
But then All Might dropped off the still body of their homeroom teacher by his feet.
“Take care of him,” All Might smiled, strained, before he shot off toward Shigaraki and the noumu. Despite the hero’s effort to keep the atmosphere positive, the sinking feeling in Izuku’s gut told him it was already too late. There’s so much blood…
He checked the pulse just to make sure. His mouth pressed into a thin, straight line as he wrestled to calm his roiling stomach at the sensation of still warm blood staining his trembling fingertips a deep red.
None.
With a heavy and shaking sigh as he forced his emotions down, he rose from his kneeling position beside Aizawa’s cooling body. With a quirk infused dash, he landed in the path of a heavy blow aimed for All Might. There was shouting, but it was drowned out by the sound of his ribcage crushing and the rush of blood thumping in his ears.
Crack, snap, splash.
The noumu’s fist ripped straight through his torso and completely obliterated his spine as it exited through his back. The pain was unbearable, but through his agony, he took some amusement at the expression of disbelief that seized the hand covered villain’s face.
Chapter Text
The fourth death was All Might—the Symbol of Peace, the Number one Hero, Hope. Watching him die tore a hole through Izuku's chest that no number or resets could ever hope to undo. It wasn't just the fact that All Might was his idol, his own personal hero... But this was All Might. If someone as great as him could be defeated—what did this mean for the rest of the world?
This iteration started out much like the previous. The difference was that this time, through a series of desperate actions on Izuku's part, Aizawa survived his bloody encounter with the noumu. Izuku gripped his partially crumbled arm tightly, an ill-fitting triumphant grin decorating his face. It took him two tries—that purple monster was fast—but his injured arm was a low price compared to keeping both his and Eraserhead's life. Nothing worth a reset, even if the pain did force him to grit his teeth tightly to prevent the torrent of tears that fought to escape his leaking sockets. Now they just had to wait for All Might, who should be here any second—
A loud crash reverberated throughout the building as the double doors to leading into the USJ blew off its hinges. Izuku smiled, even when All Might did not.
A fierce battle quickly ensued, good versus evil. And although it looked bad, although All Might's punches seemed worryingly ineffective against the purple monster with the bulging brain, barely even leaving so much as a mark on that inky skin, that smile stayed on his face. Because this was All Might, and there was no way he'd ever lose!
Izuku had gone through so much, seen too much, but it would finally be over. He could finally rest—maybe take a sick week off or two after this. Because it was
finally
over
Izuku's sunshine smile died and turned to night when the noumu tore All Might stomach open. It wasn't unlike his own, first death at the USJ. He wondered if the pain All Might felt was just as terrible.
Shigaraki laughed, loud and grating. The nauseating sound of nails on skin, fervently scratching and leaving tiny streams of blood behind, and the mad cackling was the only noise that dared to break the smothering silence. "HE'S DEAD! DEAD, DEADDEADDEAD! THE FAKE SYMBOL OF PEACE IS DEAD!"
Izuku barely even registered his own movements. He felt limp, muscles numb. He couldn't feel his body, but the figure of a gloating and raving Shigaraki was growing larger.
A hand that did not belong to him grabbed onto a sickly pale one. Without prompting, his body brought the other's hand close to his face. At this distance, he noticed small spider like cracks littering the ashen skin.
But even in the state he found himself in, living in static, he could not bring himself to complete the motion. The hand rested, trembling, in front of jade green eyes. A few unbearable second passed in anticipation, before thin fingers wrapped around wet, freckled cheeks; enclosing them, squeezing tight, tighter, tighter—life turning to ash.
Distantly, someone screamed.
Chapter 8: True Despair
Summary:
He thought it was over, but Izuku should have known better.
Chapter Text
The fifth death was Mineta Minoru. Asui was close to join him; she just barely escaped with her life, but with the injuries she sustained, she would never be able to become a hero.
Before the frog girl dragged her broken body to safety and delivered the grim news, everything seemed to fall into place. Izuku escaped the black smoke, Aizawa was still alive—Izuku’s arm broken but not crumbled—and All Might was still breathing, the noumu defeated.
Backup finally arrived, and the villains were apprehended. Their warp gate, Kurogiri, and their leader Shigaraki escaped, but everyone was alive.
It was perfect.
“Mineta-chan, he didn’t…” Asui pressed her thin lips into a straight line. “I’m the only one who made it out.”
Crack.
Izuku swore the sound of his hopes being dashed and stomped on was loud enough for the whole world to hear, but no one except for him reacted to the sound of glass violently shattering. He cringed visibly, the noise like crystal shards cutting into his eardrums which left his ears bleeding and head dizzy.
There was only one option. However, unlike previous repeats, Izuku couldn’t rely on someone else to finish the job for him. Every intruder had already been apprehended and arrested.
This reset would have to be carried out by his own two hands.
...it would be easier if they could just. Stop. Shaking.
He almost jumped out of his skin when he felt a heavy hand fall on his shoulder, and couldn’t stop the indignant yelp that escaped. Izuku lifted his head to meet an intense gaze, deep blue eyes trained on him. Iida.
The bespectacled boy may have caught him off guard, but his hand was warm. Comforting. As the class representative, he needed to be strong. It was so typical of the tall teen, to try to cheer up his friends even when he himself was hurting so. Uraraka tried the same, hugging Asui close and repeated lines of comfort and consoling words in her ear softly.
“There’s nothing you could have done,” she attempted. The other girl didn’t look like she believed her.
But whether Uraraka was right or not, there was something Izuku could do. Reluctantly, he removed Iida’s hand from his sagging shoulders. His skin felt cold and clammy, and he was still trembling. He hoped no one noticed, but then again, soon enough it wouldn’t even matter anyways.
“Midoriya-kun?” Iida asked, voice laced with concern. Izuku just gave him a sad smile in return, his usual bright eyes now dull and lifeless. He was just so tired…
“Sorry. I’ll do better next time.”
And with that, he infused his hands with the power of One for All, before snapping his neck and fell bonelessly to the ground.
Crunch.
Chapter 9: Broken
Summary:
Everything's fine.
Notes:
Edited the three latest chapters just to fix a very minor continuity error. I kinda messed up on the death count; there's so many people dying left and right that I lose track.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Izuku was shaking (tremblingtremblingtrembling), breathing harsh, ragged breaths as he choked on thin air, doing his best to calm his racing mind.
How the hell can I stay calm in a situation like this?!
His hands flew up to grapple the sides of his head, pulling at the strands to ground himself in the pain, whilst his body curled in on itself as much as it could while still standing.
He didn’t do better next time; the lie he told Iida tasting like ash in his mouth. The sixth death had been Asui. He followed her and Mineta to the Flood Zone and just barely avoided the villain with shark like teeth that once ripped his stomach open. But then, after they escaped and he thought they’d be safe, the villain covered in hands interrupted their moment of reprieve to ruin it all with just one, single action. He watched in horror as Shigaraki’s fingers curled around Asui’s face and crumbled the girl’s flesh like burning paper.
Was that how it looked on me too?
This was now his eighth repeat, and he was determined to make it his last.
That’s what you said the first seven deaths too.
“Deku-kun? Are you alright?”
The thump thump thumping in Izuku’s ears were so loud it almost drowned out the sound of Uraraka’s worrying voice. He took a few deep breaths (one two three four five, one two three four five, he counted) before uncurling. He gave her a shaky smile, the biggest he could muster. He didn’t want to put his friends through any more pain than necessary.
“I’m fine,” he lied. Uraraka didn’t look convinced, and he could see Iida eyeing him with concern as well, but any further questions they might have had were forgotten when a dark, misty portal swirled into existence in the middle of the USJ plaza.
Here we go.
“Everyone, get back! These are villains!”
He cried. He cried, and cried and cried. It’s finally over!
Everyone was alive, more or less. No fatal injuries. Izuku worried about All Might and Aizawa who received the worst of it, and wondered if he needed another redo, but Recovery Girl assured him they would survive.
The villain’s were arrested. Kurogiri and Shigaraki got away, again, but that was a problem left for another day. Perhaps the smart choice would have been to go through the loop again until every loose end was tied in a perfect knot, but Izuku didn’t want to reset again. He didn’t want to go through it all again.
Idon’twanttoIdon’twanttoIdon’twantto.
Perhaps it was selfish, but he just couldn’t. Not unless it was absolutely necessary.
But it’s fine now. Everything’s fine. Everything will be alright.
…
Will he?
He shook his head. It’s fine. All those deaths that happened—that was in another reality, not this one. Sure, everyone was left shaken from the attack, but it’s fine. No one died. It could have been worse.
So much worse.
“Are you alright?”
Iida. Of course he was concerned; Izuku was still crying.
“I-I’m fine!” he sobbed. It was true, but why did he feel like he just told a terrible lie?
“Are you sure?” the class president put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and gave him a small, comforting smile. When Izuku lifted his gaze (faded, dead) to meet his friends eyes, he felt the hand on him tighten.
“I’m fine,” he repeated. “Just a bit shaken, is all.”
“I—,” Iida opened his mouth, staring into those blank, green eyes. “...are you absolutely sure?”
“I’m fine, ” he repeated for a third time, voice harsh and angry. He took a shaky breath to calm his roiling emotions, feeling guilty for snapping at the other teen. Iida was just trying to be a good friend. “I just need to rest a little.”
“...” Iida was silent, but eventually relented. “Alright… if you say so. Just remember that if anything is ever bothering you, I’m here to listen.”
Uraraka ran up to join them, a relieved smile relaxing her face. “You guys!” she called, but stopped dead in her track when she spotted Izuku.
“Are you alright?” she asked, her mouth turning down into a frown.
Izuku could barely find the energy to dignify her with a response. It took every last ounce of his remaining strength to muster up a reply.
“I’m fine.”
Notes:
A moment's rest.
Chapter 10: Jagged Edges
Summary:
A moment's rest.
Notes:
A bit late, sorry about that. I just wasn't feeling it yesterday, and I feel like my writing is better when I actually feel like writing, you know? So this is better for everyone. Also, this story is going to go on hiatus for a while. The reason is that I haven't written much more past this point—the Stain arc is coming up and my memory is slightly fussy about what exactly goes down. I remember all the important stuff, but not the small details. I contemplated rereading the manga, but I have decided to wait for the anime to catch up. Experiencing the anime is going to be more exciting when I don't remember every little detail that takes place in the manga, you know?
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"My boy."
Izuku stilled at the sound of All Might's voice, calling for his attention. It wasn't unusual for him and the hero to converse with each other, but there was something about the seriousness in his teacher's tone that put him on edge.
"Y-yes!" he cringed as he squeaked out a reply, turning trembling eyes to face All Might. The hero was silent for a moment, further setting Izuku's nerves on edge as he awaited his sentence. It felt like All Might stared right into his very soul, and judged every inch accordingly; like those icy blues read him like an open book, tearing it open and ripping apart the pages one by one.
"Your friends came to me with some concerns regarding your well being," he started. Paused. Then, "And I agree."
Cold sweat began to form on the back of Izuku's neck.
"I know you always worry too much about small details, but I can see that this is more than that. You did speak with our school therapist as recommended after the villain attack, right?"
Izuku nodded carefully in response. "I did." But there was only so much he could reveal; so much one person could help him with.
"Hm…" All Might looked contemplative, bringing one of his large hands up to his chin and rubbed it thoughtfully. "Do you think it helped?"
"I…" he swallowed hard. "...please don't worry about me. There's just a lot going on in my life recently, and I need some time to process it. I'll be okay." Well, it wasn't a complete lie.
"..." All Might stalked close to him, before he patted his back in a comforting gesture, being mindful of his strength as to not send his student reeling. Then, he flashed him a thumbs up and a smile, the light reflecting of his pearly whites in a way that hurt to look at. It made Izuku's eyes water in pain, but he refused to look away.
"Of course! You are strong, my boy! Don't ever think otherwise!" All Might boasted. The anxious boy cracked a smile at that; even if he didn't believe in his mentor's words, it was nice to know All Might had faith in him.
"...thanks."
Izuku's heart felt a little lighter for the rest of the day.
Taking time to spend with people Izuku saw die during the USJ was a therapeutic experience. It reminded him that they were still there, still alive. It didn't have to be a lot, just a "Good morning Todoroki!", "Can I ask a question, sensei?" or a "You don't look nervous at all for the Sports Festival Asui! How can you always stay so calm?". Hearing them reply put his mind at ease, and when night came, he replayed the memories over and over in his head until he passed out from sheer exhaustion, too tired for the nightmares to reach him.
The upcoming U.A. Sports Festival also helped. He could spend all his focus on training, leaving no thoughts left for what occurred at the USJ. And while he was of course nervous to compete on national television, it was a welcome feeling to burning despair and hopeless misery.
He could finally relax, and day by day, the bloody memories of a past that never happened gradually began to fade. It would always stay there, in the back of his mind and in his dreams, but now he could face his teachers and classmates without their dead eyed corpses staring back.
The Sports Festival came and went, and even if Izuku didn't win like All Might (and himself) had hoped, it was fine. Even if his right hand was left permanently crooked and scarred after his (quite literally) heated match with Todoroki, it was fine.
No one died. No villain's attacked. There was no need for a reset, and Izuku could help someone without having to die in the process for once. It was just too bad Iida had to leave before the winner's ceremony was over; watching Kacchan writhe in his restraints on the first place pedestal had been kind of funny.
...since when did he stop being so scary?
Hero names. Izuku wanted to laugh. When he presented his own, it was with a smile, bitter under its bright facade.
"Are you sure? You might be called that for the rest of your life, you know."
Kirishima's concern was appreciated, but ultimately wasted. Better save that energy for someone else.
"Yes, I'm sure. This is my hero name."
Deku. Useless.
How fitting.
Notes:
Izuku, you need to stop selling yourself so short. :I Things would be WAY worse without you.
Anyways, here's a bit of a mix between happy and depressing stuff! Izuku's already low self esteem have taken a beating after watching his friends die again and again. But you know... things gotta get worse before they get better. My end goal is to give Izuku a happy ending (well, as happy as possible), but he's going to have to go through hell before that.
Chapter 11: Lies, Dreams and Hard Truths
Summary:
Izuku finds Iida in an alley.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The first time, he was too slow. When he finally found Iida in that dark and miserable alleyway, it was to the sight of his body lying prone in a puddle of cooling blood. There was someone else there too, just as still and lifeless as his friend, but Izuku didn't stay long enough to identify them before he reset.
Dying was becoming easier, and Izuku was not sure if that thought comforted him or not. In the end, it did not much matter much what he thought of it; he would end up restarting either way. So, he choose to ignore it instead. He just did what needed to be done.
He was quite proud of his second entrance. It had been a blaze of speed and strength, with his fist landing square into Iida's would-be killer's face faster than anyone could shout "Deku!". As his knuckles made contact, there was an audible crunch that Izuku found much more satisfying than any proper hero should. He choose to ignore that too.
Iida stared at him, shocked, and with something that might be despair written across his face, while his body lay paralyzed and frustratingly vulnerable on the crimson splattered ground. But when he shouted, "This had nothing to do with you! Don't get involved!" the only thing Izuku felt was anger, burning deep, like acid in his gut.
Was Iida really telling him to run? Did he have any clue as to what would happen if Izuku did?
"Do you really want to die that badly?!"
His words were harsh, he knew. Of course Iida didn't know. Couldn't know. It must be easy for him to imagine that justice—which is no doubt what his friend keeps telling himself is the true reason he found himself in this alley, chasing after the man who mutilated his brother—would always prevail. But Izuku knew better. Izuku knew that sometimes, evil did win. But people would continue to convince themselves otherwise, so that they could fall asleep at night, knowing that nothing could, would, or ever will harm them of the people they cared about.
Everything would be fine. Things always worked themselves out in the end.
What a joke.
But Iida didn't have to know just what a big lie it all was. He already got a taste of it when his older brother was rushed to the hospital, and it was announced that he may never walk again.
No. People needed to believe that everything would be fine—they needed to believe that a hero always show up to save the day. It's the dream All Might fights to protect every day, what Izuku fights to protect, what all heroes should fight to protect. Because the truth was enough to drive you insane.
"If you want me to leave that badly, then make me."
Iida didn't make a move, and Izuku couldn't care less whether that was because of Stain's quirk or not.
Notes:
Apologies for the wait. I kind of fell out the BNHA fandom, but here we are with the Stain arc! I have written some more chapters in advance, one of which I am very proud of and hope you will enjoy. I'll probably post one chapter a day, until I run out and there will be a pause as I write for the next arc.
Chapter 12: Punchline
Summary:
Deku's life must be one, big joke.
Chapter Text
It was naive of him to think he could take on the Hero Killer by himself, but he had been unwilling to put anyone else in harm's way. He figured it would be fine; if he lost, Stain would just kill him and he was free to try again.
But he didn't. Instead, as Izuku cried for his muscles to move, the villain moved right past him, as if he hadn't even realized Izuku was there in the first place. His feet slowed and finally stopped as they found themselves in front of Iida, still on the ground. Izuku could only scream as he watched that blade plunge into his friend's neck. The other hero with them, Native, followed shortly after.
Unable to move, watching Iida's face growing ever paler as blood spurted out of his gaping mouth and open wound, was by far the worst thing Izuku had experienced during the loops. The USJ couldn't compare, because at least then he had always been able to do something… Even as he tried to look away (just an inch, that's all I'm begging for, just move an inch) he couldn't shut his ears to the wet gurgling of Iida struggling for his one, last breath.
Stain left, not even deigning his victims with a glance as he stalked off. "You're weak, but your hero's spirit is strong. Let this experience serve as a lesson: remember it, and use it to grow strong, so that next time you may save a life."
He wasn't sure what was so amusing, but a shrill laugh suddenly burst through his lips. It echoed and bounced across graffitied walls and halted the killer in his track. "A lesson? You killed my friend for a lesson?" Tears streamed down his face. "You tell me to save lives, but what about you?" His fingers twitched. "I don't want to hear that from a murderer!"
If Hero Killer Stain had any retort to that, Izuku didn't wait to listen. His neck cracked and windpipes crushed against impossibly strong fingers. The laughter stopped, and the alleyway fell silent.
Chapter Text
As much as he detested the idea of putting anyone else but himself in danger, he didn't have much choice. Someone was going to get hurt no matter what he did, but he could at least increase his chances of everyone getting out of this alive.
His fingers swiped over the screen of his phone, known to him as well as the back of his own hand. It came from days since passed, when every free period at school would be spent browsing the latest hero news and forums while he waited for the day to be over.
The message was simple, only containing his location, along with his hope. He didn't have any time to elaborate, and all he could do was to keep faith as it was delivered to every last number saved in his contacts.
And when orange flames lit up the alleyway, crashing through it like a furious wave and licking the edges of his vision as it warmed his too clammy, too cold body, he could feel his hope burn with it. Only one person had answered his plea for help, but Izuku could not have asked for anyone better.
"Todoroki-kun!"
Notes:
Sorry for not posting yesterday, but I didn't have the time. This one is really short, but I'm going to post a second chapter very soon! Both to make up for the shortness, and for not posting yesterday.
Chapter Text
Deku should have expected it. He should have—but he hadn't wanted to. He hadn't—
I never wanted any of this.
—wanted to.
The pride he felt as he watched Todoroki use his left side, wielding the flames like they belonged to him—because they did, it's your power!—was overshadowed by pain when he watched them flicker out and die. The scarred face of the boy looked colder than ever, and Izuku hated how he could hear every sickening drop, rip and slice in the silence left after the roaring fire's wake. Of course he would get Todoroki killed. Again.
It's not any better than the first.
And Iida. And Native.
"You're weak, but your hero's spirit is strong. Let this experience serve as a lesson: remember it, and use it to grow strong, so that next time you may save a life."
Ha, ha, ha…
Now that's funny.
Notes:
Another short one... but the next one is going to be a bit longer.
Chapter 15: Stain
Summary:
This wasn't supposed to happen.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
"You're weak, but your hero's spirit is strong. Let this experience serve as a lesson: remember it, and use it to grow strong, so that next time you may save a life."
"You're weak, but your hero's spirit is strong. Let this experience serve as a lesson: remember it, and use it to grow strong, so that next time you may save a life."
"You're weak—"
"You're weak—"
"You—"
"—save a life."
"Shut up!"
Izuku couldn't listen to this again, he couldn't—
Again and again and again! I just want you gone already—gonegonegonegonegone—
Restart. Reset.
"I wish you were dead."
This… was not supposed to happen. This isn't what heroes did. Right?
That man was going to kill them. Iida, Native, Todoroki—
He deserved it.
But Izuku wasn't happy. Nor sad, or guilty. Not even angry. He just felt—
Nothing. Nothing at all.
Blood stained his pristine white gloves red, and he felt nothing. It had been so easy, it was almost funny. Here, he had fought so hard, retried so many times, but all it had taken was one punch.
His arm hung limply, a rainbow of blues, reds and purples. If he could have felt it, he bet the pain would be excruciating. But all he felt was the dead weight of an unresponding limb by his side, numb, like the rest of him.
Jade eyes stared darkly at Stain, propped up against a wall and slumped over bonelessly. Red liquid seeped into the fabric of his clothes, almost invisible against the red and blacks, which Izuku supposed was the point.
The head had been reduced into a red and pink stain on the wall, with chunks of skin, hair and splinters of bone clinging to every nearby surface, glued on with drying blood.
It was sick, but the thought was nothing more than a courtesy. Locked behind a glass wall, it pounded and shouted for him to listen! But the boy couldn't even deign himself to so much as glance in its direction, preferring to feign deafness in place of this screaming voice that spoke all too much.
"Midoriya-kun!"
He jolted into awareness when he felt a hand slam down onto his shoulder. Iida was staring at him, eyes wide, looking as if he didn't even recognize the person before him.
"You…" the broad shouldered teen swallowed heavily, looking unsure. As if he didn't know whether to pull Izuku toward him or push away. His lips opened and closed over and over again, but no words ever left. Then, in a move that must have surprised them both, the emerald boy was pulled into a tight hug. Izuku shoulder was growing wet as Iida found his head buried into the crook of his neck.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm sorry…"
Izuku heard Iida mumble the words over and over, as he rocked both their bodies slowly back and forth. And, just like that, the walls broke and crumbled into dust as Izuku's body shook violently as sob after sob ripped through his throat painfully. It hurt, so so much, but Iida refused to let go, only clinging onto him harder.
He knew what had to be done. But, for just a moment, Izuku let himself stay like that, as each boy cried their pains out.
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm sorry…"
Notes:
I can't believe Stain is fucking dead.
Someone said Izuku needed a hug. I'm not sure if this is what you meant.
I'll admit, this chapter kind of got away from me. I already planned for Izuku to kill Stain at some point, but not here. But then it happened. And then Izuku was supposed to reset out of guilt after Iida gave him this Look™, but then suddenly the boys were hugging each other and I ain't even mad. This is probably my favorite chapter thus far, tbh.
Chapter 16: BurningBurningBurning
Summary:
He feels like he's reaching a boiling point.
Notes:
Sorry for the delay. I had some trouble writing this chapter. :/ But hey! At least it's my longest one yet!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"You've improved a lot since we last fought each other," Todoroki commented, staring at him with a blank expression that Izuku sincerely wished he could read. "I have to admit, I feel a bit… intimidated."
Izuku laughed nervously, his fingers curling into his hair and tugging at the strands until he felt his skin prickle in pain. "Oh, that was just the adrenaline…"
Todoroki blinked at him slowly, looking sceptical. But then, he shrugged, before training icy eyes upon the unmoving form below them. He ran his fingers over the bleeding cut on his cheek and his face scrunched up into a grimace. His offended expression forced one side of Izuku's lips to curl up in response, and he lowered his head in a poor attempt to conceal it, not looking to provoke his classmate any further.
"Could have been worse," the curly haired boy commented dryly, glancing over Todoroki's unmarked arms. The stoic teen quirked an eyebrow in response, but when no further explanation was given, returned back to the topic at hand.
"At any rate, we should find a hero, before this villain regain consciousness."
Izuku agreed with a silent nod, and Todoroki bent over to pick up one end of the rope meticulously bound around the red and black form of Hero Killer Stain, while Iida stood by the sidelines, uncharacteristically silent. Native wasn't far off, but the pro looked like he didn't quite know what to do with himself. It must be embarrassing for him, to be rescued from the clutches of a notorious serial killer by three school kids. Though the relief of still being alive probably took away most of the sting.
Gran Torino gave them an earful when he found them, as did the other pro-heroes that arrived on scene. Still, there was a hint of awe there too, barely disguised between lectures about responsibility and harsh words telling them how "lucky" they had been. "It's a miracle none of you sustained any serious injuries! You kids could have died, fighting a villain like this!"
Izuku's lips pressed into a thin line. He felt something burning beneath his skin, making him itch with the desire to rake his nails all over it, scratching and scratching until it went away. Instead, he spoke without meaning to, and regretted it as soon as the words left his stiff lips. "Iida and Native would be dead if it weren't for me."
He wasn't sure what the look the heroes gave him meant. Gran Torino frowned at him in clear disapproval, and Izuku bit the inside of his cheek hard until he tasted blood. He let out a trembling sigh and let his green eyes fall to the ground, inspecting every crack and crevice in the asphalt like it was his favorite novel.
Someone called an ambulance while another contacted the police, and Iida approached his classmates silently. Then, he bowed deeply in typical Iida-fashion, before rambling out some apology that Izuku barely had the energy to listen to. "You were both put in terrible danger because of me… I am truly sorry."
Sorry…
"I'm sorry… I'm sorry… I'm sorry…"
Izuku let out a loud gasp, curling in on himself as he felt a throbbing pain in his chest and a feeling of drowning so great he didn't even notice the fingers scratching at his throat in frantic and desperate gestures. And even though he continuously gulped down air like one would water, it was like vacuum in his lungs and he couldn't breathe—
He felt like he was dying.
"Midoriya!"
There was a second of confusion, where all he could hear were screams and shouts, along with a feeling of weightlessness. Another second and he realized that, no, someone was carrying him, their sharp claws digging painfully into his back as they took off with him into the sky, wings flapping loudly as they carried him off to god knows where.
Izuku didn't know who, or what, had taken him, but one look at the faces staring back up at him from the ground, twisted up in surprise, shock and horror, told him enough.
No, he thought. Stain had finally been defeated, after so many tries, after so many deaths—
—Izuku couldn't—he wouldn't—
I refuse to go through that again.
Anger bubbled up inside of him once more, so hot that he feared it might boil him alive if he let it continue. He screamed—screamed so loud he thought he could taste copper in his mouth, loud enough to shatter his ear drums—
It wasn't a scream out of terror or fear, but one of frustration, anger, rage.
He'd never felt a feeling so intense; it was almost frightening.
He screamed, and he wasn't sure when it happened,but he could feel the power of One for All coursing through his veins, mixing with the fury and hate that was devouring his insides like a black hole. He twisted in his grip, and he felt talons dig deep red lines into his back, but he couldn't care less. He lifted his arms over his head, and his fingers curled around the base of the monster's bird like feet. With practiced motions, he twisted, digging fingers deep, deep and deeper, refusing to be the first to
Let.
Go.
The thing screeched ungodly as it was forced to relinquish its grip on its victim, but Izuku held on. He continued to scream as he climbed up its body, placing himself on its back as he began to twist one of its wings, shouting words of command.
"Let me go! Let me down! Let me DOWN, before I tear both your wings off!"
He wrenched his curled fist for emphasis, and whether the thing actually understood him or not, it begun to lower itself ungracefully to the ground as it continued to shriek and writhe, struggling uselessly to throw Izuku off of its back.
It wasn't until it crashed stomach first into the asphalt that he deigned to relinquish his grip on the creature. He took a few tentative steps back as he fought against the anger still raging hot inside of him, breathing hard as he tried to calm down. One for All still surged through his limbs, with want, but Izuku knew he couldn't.
Don't do it… you know you can't…
He closed his eyes for just a moment, and when he opened them again, red and black flashed across his eyes. A familiar vision of chipped metal made him jump back, but Stain made no move for him. The sight of the lifeless noumu distressed him, for he wasn't sure if he felt relieved or not. But in tact with the bloodied sword that slid out of the monster's skull, was the pressure lifting off his mind, and he felt… he felt…
Stain was breathing just as heavily as Izuku himself, awash with anger and frustration, too immense to stay trapped within their flesh as it clawed itself screaming through their throats. The boy bit his tongue as his mouth clamped shut, making a vain attempt to beat his emotions into submission, and it took him a few seconds to realize that the villain was speaking.
"...all of this, is for the sake of a just world. I will continue to purge this world of these fraudulent heroes until they finally realize the true meaning of the word—and if they don't, this sham of a hero industry shall die with them."
What the hell are you even talking about? Izuku thought, bitterly. In what world is murdering my friends justice?
Stain shifted by his side, neck snapping backwards and eyes glowing red with righteous fury, and wasn't that just the most pathetic thing Izuku had ever seen?
He spoke. "Endeavor! The fakest of the fakes!"
Well… even a broken clock is right twice a day.
Izuku turned around, taking in the newly arrived hero. As much as he disliked the man, he was more than happy to see him, knowing that this nightmare would finally be over. Izuku didn't know how Stain had managed to break free of his bonds in the first place—which he insisted on tying himself, checking every knot twice before he was satisfied—but the Number Two Hero should be more than enough to keep the villain detained until the police arrived to arrest him. And then he can rot in prison for the rest of his life—with any luck, he'll realize what a horrible person he is and use his scarf as a noose to spare the world of his existence.
Izuku's eyes widened just as the thought passed. What—what the hell did I just…?
He shook his head, shuddered, and filed that reaction away to be analyzed at a later date. Right now…
His gaze landed on Stain. He was still standing in the same spot as before, the only difference being that his bandana had fallen off at some point, revealing a hollow space in his face where a nose should be. Why is he still standing here? Is he still speaking? Then, he looked to the heroes. They all shared the same expression of unimaginable terror, including the Number Two Hero Endeavor himself. What the hell are they doing? There is a villain right in front of you! How about you do your job and apprehend him already?
His brows furrowed in confused frustration, cutting the villain off before more bullshit could spill out of his mouth. "Hey."
As the one word syllable left his mouth, it was as if some spell had been broken, but Izuku wasn't sure what it was. All he felt was the shift in atmosphere as Stain's tirade trailed off into nothingness, and the seemingly frozen heroes thawed and left whatever trance they had been put in. They all blinked in unison rather comically, looking all so very confused that it was hard not to giggle at the absurness of it.
"Shouldn't you arrest this guy or something? I mean, it is kinda your job. So maybe stop standing around there being completely useless and do something?"
And with that, whatever remnants of magic Stain held over the crowd of heroes dissolved like smoke and carried off into the wind to places unknown. Faces of terror morphed into shame and embarrassment. Maybe Izuku should feel guilty for speaking so out of turn, but honestly… right now, he couldn't give less of a shit, even if he tried.
He just wanted to go home already. Go home, so that he can scream until he can't anymore. And when his throat seizes up and his vocal chords are torn to bloody shreds, the only sound that will echo in his ears is his own shrill voice—like a fire alarm installed right behind his eardrums, ringing and ringing until it eventually falls silent, drowned and muffled by the blood filling his ear canals—his nose being assaulted by the smell of iron as it runs down his jaw, rivulets of red warming his face and dripping off of his chin like a broken tap. And then, he can't hear anything. There will be no sound, and no feeling. There will be nothing. Just—
silence.
Notes:
My boy is a n g e r y.
I like playing around with formatting when writing. I think it can really add a lot of feeling to your writing, you know? Hopefully you agree, and don't find it distracting.
Next chapter is going to be fun. There's gonna be some things I think you guys will enjoy. 8)
Also, writing this makes it sound like I hate Stain. I don't, by the way. He's one of my favorite villains in BNHA. Izuku most certainly hates him though, and can you blame him? :P
Chapter 17: What Is a Hero?
Summary:
Izuku just doing what any decent person would.
Chapter Text
Izuku didn't think this hospital visit was necessary, but he supposed it was only standard protocol. As expected, neither Todoroki nor Iida had received any serious injuries. Izuku made sure of it. The one to receive the worst of it was himself, but the red gashes on his back looked worse than they really were.
Hopefully, they could leave soon. He just wanted to go home already. I wonder if mom heard about what happened yet.
His mouth twisted into a grimace. It would be nice to have an invisibility quirk like Hagakure. If he did, he'd be able to disappear at a moments notice. And by the time someone finally realizes, he'd already be far, far gone.
He could feel eyes on him. Had been, for a while. It made his skin crawl, because he knew what kind of eyes those were. Curious eyes. Questioning eyes. Concerned eyes. He wanted to puke.
Stop it. Stop looking at me. Stop caring. Why can't you just forget about me?
He knows it should make him happy. His friends worried about him, because he was important to them. But it didn't make him happy at all, and that just made Izuku hate himself even more, because it was so selfish of him. Wallowing in his own little pity party of despair when he should be happy, because he's gotten everything he wanted. The least he could do is show some fucking appreciation.
Look at you. You're a hero now. A
great
fucking
hero.
You should give yourself a gold star, or something.
He let out a bitter laugh that caught in his throat, threatening to morph into a sob, because Izuku just couldn't keep his emotions in check it seemed. He didn't know what was so funny, but it felt like the only appropriate response to the situation. That's right, just laugh it up. I'm sure you'll stop hating yourself then.
When the door to hospital room holding Izuku and his two classmates clicked open, he turned his head in its direction. There stood Gran Torino, along with the hero Manual and—a man?—that Izuku didn't recognize. The stranger "woofed" in greeting, and Izuku really should have expected that, considering the person was sporting the head of a literal dog. Nonetheless, it still managed to catch him off guard. He looked to Gran Torino, but the retired hero only shook his head at his inquisitive stare.
The dog-man's name was Tsuragamae Kenji, chief of police. From the sounds of it, he was here to scold them for their unlawful quirk usage. Which no, he's totally right! They should have just let Stain kill them without even attempting to fight back. Which, sure, Izuku would have called it self-defense, but no, we must think of the poor, poor serial killer. He might have gotten seriously hurt!
Izuku immediately cast a paranoid glance around the room, making sure that he didn't say any of that out loud. But when all the of attention still seemed to be focused on Tsuragamae, he let out a sigh of relief. As much as he wanted to speak up, this wasn't the time to pick a fight with the police.
"Hold on," Todoroki interrupted the lecture, furrowing his brows. "If we hadn't done anything, Iida and Native would be dead right now. Are you saying we should be punished for that?"
Izuku suddenly felt much lighter, glad he wasn't alone in his opinion. He's been filled with so many unwanted and intrusive thoughts lately, he was beginning to forget what was and wasn't appropriate. Encouraged by the elemental user, he straightened his back and added to Todoroki's words.
"Heroes are supposed to save people," he said, accusatory eyes locking onto the police chief. His insides fluttered uncomfortably, but he continued anyways. "Actually, scratch that—we should all strive to help each other, not just heroes. I don't see much difference between using a quirk to defend myself, compared to martial arts or a knife. Would you arrest me for punching a robber in the face?"
It wasn't like he didn't understand the need for quirk regulations, but if the threat of being taken into police custody was the reward for fighting tooth and nail for your own survival, there needed to be changes.
Iida jumped up from the spot on his bed to swipe his arms in Izuku's and Todoroki's direction. "Stop it, both of you! He's got a point, and your reaction is just going to make it worse for us!"
"Good grief," Tsuragamae sighed. "You're really not making this easy for me."
Izuku thinks that last part was directed at him, because the police chief shot him a somewhat disappointed look. "Quirks can be much harder to control, and cause a lot more damage, than your fists. I'd expect you to understand that better than most. Besides, I think you're both misunderstanding something here."
Todoroki looked suspicious, and Izuku shared his sentiment. He'd had enough shit thrown his way that any form of respite was immediately suspect. Still, the pair waited silently for the chief to continue before they caused any more of a commotion.
The dog-man sighed one more time, before he explained. "That was just my opinion as the police. But punishing you would only be necessary if your involvement in defeating the Hero Killer was made public knowledge." His expression turned serious as he regarded the three students, or as serious as a dog's face could look. "It's ultimately your decision. What is more important to you? The admiration of the public? Or would you rather continue to live your lives normally, with the knowledge that your role in taking down Hero Killer Stain must remain a secret?"
The chief crossed his hands behind his back and straightened his posture. "I know what I would choose. And despite what you may believe, I would rather not penalize you for taking down one of Japan's most notorious serial killers."
Now, that surprised him. The knots in his stomach loosened slightly, and Izuku peered over at Todoroki and Iida. Personally, he could care less about public opinion. I didn't save my friend so strangers can fawn over me.
His classmates seemed to agree, because now they were bowing their heads and voicing their gratitude. Izuku let his own head drop with them because, yes, despite his earlier outbursts, he was appreciative of what Tsuragamae was doing for them. He wasn't going to take out his bitterness on him by showing bad manners. Well, he'd try not to, at least.
I might have to apologize to some people later, once I'm in a better mood. I've said a lot of things that I really shouldn't have.
Even if he meant every word of it.
It didn't take long before they were allowed to leave the hospital. But before they were discharged, Izuku's mother dropped by for a visit, to no surprise. What was also unsurprising was when Izuku had to reassure her at least ten times that he was fine, before she would finally stop crying. And once visiting hours were up, she ignored the nurses telling her the patients needed their rest, refusing to budge until the green haired boy had to make a promise that he would call as soon as he could leave, and head straight home afterwards. Uraraka didn't visit personally, too busy with her internship, but she did give him a call to make sure they were alright. Izuku had stared at the name displayed across his phone screen for several seconds, before finally picking up.
Uraraka bombarded him with questions, mostly about their condition and the severity of their injuries. Izuku answered to the best of his ability, silently wishing for this conversation to end already.
"You sound tired," Uraraka commented suddenly, worry evident in the tone of her voice.
"A lot happened," Izuku answered simply, shrugging of her concerns. "But it's all fine now. I'll just get some good sleep when I get home."
He refrained from telling her that there was a greater chance of him winning the lottery, than the possibility of him getting a decent night's sleep.
Iida had been unusually quiet for most of their stay. Each time Izuku peered in his direction, he seemed to be deep in thought. Izuku thought that maybe he was supposed to wait for his friend to share his feelings at his own pace, but eventually he grew tired of just staring. He stood up, made himself comfortable next to Iida on the hospital bed, and spoke.
"What are you thinking about?"
Iida blinked, caught off guard by the sudden query. "Huh?"
"You've been staring at the floor like it holds the answer to all of life's mysteries," Izuku commented, nodding toward the white linoleum. "What's on your mind?"
Iida gazed at him with a contemplative expression. There was an awkward silence, and by the time Izuku accepted that he wasn't going to receive an answer, the familiar deep timbre of his friend's voice entered his ears.
"Do you think I'd make a good hero?"
Izuku had to make a double take at that. A hollow feeling settled in his chest and he wondered, where is this coming from all of a sudden?
"Of course," he answered, frowning. "Why do you ask?"
"I just…" Iida sighed, his eyes returning to their staring contest with the floor. "If it weren't for you, I'd be dead right now. When I saw the Hero Killer… I wasn't thinking rationally. I just wanted him to be punished for what he did. I didn't care how, I just know…" the boy cringed, before speaking in a low tone, almost a whisper. "I know I wanted him to hurt."
Iida carefully met his eyes, but his head remained angled downwards, almost as if he was afraid of facing his classmate fully. He looked so defeated, and Izuku felt his heart twinge in pain. Then, he asked, "Does that make me a bad person?"
Izuku grabbed his friend's hands, his scarred fingers wrapping around them in a too tight grip, like he was afraid of what would happen if he let go. His stomach felt sick. He wouldn't allow Iida to hurt like this. He wouldn't.
"You're not a bad person, Iida-kun," he told him, his voice containing as much strength and conviction as he could muster. He needed Iida to know. He needed him to know that, no, you're not a bad person. "Stain hurt someone you loved. Of course you wanted him to hurt too—don't feel bad for being human. Alright?"
"But—" Iida tugged his hands free, his gaze falling into his lap. His head dropped even lower than before as he hunched over himself, arms shaking. "That still doesn't excuse what I did. I shouldn't have confronted him alone like that… I should have just contacted Manual right away. Native and I could have died because of my selfishness."
"Iida." The dark haired boy turned to look at him. His expression was grim, overflowing with deep-seated regret and burning shame. This isn't right. "Like I said—you're not a bad person. Yes, you made a mistake. Everyone makes mistakes. You, me… even All Might can't be right all the time. Your brother was put in the hospital, and the first thought when you saw the man responsible was to hurt him. And that's normal, okay?"
Iida nodded, but he still looked unconvinced. Izuku continued.
"Like you said, you weren't thinking rationally. But that doesn't make you're a bad person—anyone would have felt the same in your situation. And if they tell you they wouldn't, they're either a liar or a psychopath," Izuku took a deep breath, gathering his words, before finishing. "All you can do now is to learn from it. It's pointless trying to think of what you should, or could have done. It won't change anything, and it definitely won't make you feel better. You just need to make sure you don't make the same mistake twice."
Izuku locked eyes with his friend, emerald green meeting a royal blue. "Alright?"
It took a few moments, but eventually, Iida nodded. It was slow, unsure, but he didn't look like he was dismissing the words completely. Instead, he looked considering. That's good. It would still need time to stew, but Izuku hoped his words would make the impact he was hoping for. He's not used to comforting people, aside from his mother. But for his friends, he would try. It's what a hero would do. What any decent human being would do.
"Besides," Izuku added, after a thoughtful silence. "If you're a bad person, then I must be terrible."
Iida's eyes widened in shock, and it didn't take long before his arms was waving in frantic gestures. "What are you—Midoriya-kun, you're a perfectly respectable human being! What are you even saying?"
Izuku shrugged, but his insides tingled with an indecipherable emotion. "If that's what you think, then you have nothing to worry about."
And with that, Izuku stood up sharply, before stalking back to his own bed with a calculated coolness. His skin felt prickly and it itched uncomfortably, but he ignored it. Any further queries thrown his way went unanswered as he settled back onto the mint green sheets of his bed. If he was lucky, he might be able to get some sleep before he had to return home.
Notes:
I said there was going to be some exciting stuff in this chapter, but uh... the hospital scene got a lot longer than I intended, so all the fun stuff I was looking forward to will be in the next part. Whoops. But hey, watching Izuku try to be a good friend is nice too, right? Or maybe I'm just a sucker for friendship.
I'm just gonna go ahead and add a tag for that, because this story is starting to contain a lot more friendship than I thought it would.
Chapter 18: Friends
Summary:
If there was one thing Izuku did not expect, it was this.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
If there was one thing Izuku didn't expect out of this whole Hero Killer business, it was this.
"Dude, why did you never tell me you were such a badass?!"
Izuku blinked in surprise, staring dumbly at Kaminari.
"Excuse me?" the word left his mouth automatically, being the first thought that entered his brain after the bizarre exclamation.
As soon as he had stepped through the classroom doors, it had felt as if every head turned in his direction simultaneously. Next he knew, his classmates were crowding around him, all with equally excited expressions on their faces. Ashido squeezed herself to the front of the throng of students, yelling gleefully.
"The Hero Killer!"
Izuku took an immediate stumbling step backwards. What? Instantly, he searched for the familiar faces of Iida and Todoroki. He couldn't imagine either of them would slip up about what occurred in that dark alley, but why else was he being hounded like this?
Todoroki sat quietly in his seat, eyes focused on the tabletop. Iida was making his way toward the group circled around Izuku, all the while waving his arms excessively and yelling about "proper classroom conduct" and to "give Midoriya-kun his personal space".
Thankfully, the words didn't go completely ignored, as the students took some short steps back, but it did nothing to kill their animated chatter. Izuku met his bespectacled friend with a questioning gaze, but Iida seemed just as bewildered as he was.
The freckled teen turned back to his classmates. He tilted his head slightly, switched his emotions off, and spoke flatly.
"I have no idea what you are talking about."
Kaminari laughed and stepped up next to him, slapping him on the back.
"Don't be like that, dude! We've all seen the video."
Izuku face grew cold as all blood left it at once. "The video?" he sputtered, alarm bells ringing in his ears. Iida went still as his attention shifted solely to Kaminari, mouth still gaping open in silent reprimands.
"Yeah!" the electric user took a step back, taking in Izuku with eyes filled with… reverence? "Stain was like, super intimidating. Scared the crap out of me. But you didn't even care! You just went 'hey', and then scolded all those heroes right after like it was nothing! Like, damn, I wish I had those kind of guts. Totally fearless."
Izuku blinked. "Oh." Another blink. Silence. "Uh…"
His tensed muscles relaxed by a tiny fraction, but his confusion remained. From the sound of it, the video Kaminari was talking about wasn't his fight with Stain. Which, now that he thinks about it, he probably should have realized. Otherwise, Todoroki and Iida would be receiving the same treatment as he was right now.
His classmates didn't seem satisfied with his reticence however, because suddenly, Ashido was in his face, sharing something on her phone.
"Look—it's all over the internet! Someone even made a forum for you!"
"What?!" He promptly snatched the phone from his pink skinned acquaintance, scanning the screen in disbelief. The banner of the website read 'Deku Fanclub' in bold lettering, with the tagline 'The fearless hero of U.A.' just underneath.
Izuku felt lightheaded as he scrolled through the site, his disbelief increasing with every second spent staring at the words and pictures filling the bright screen. He didn't know what to feel about this. He really didn't. Was he supposed to be happy? Maybe. Was he? He honestly had no idea. The only emotion he could currently decipher was unadulterated confusion.
"This…" he spoke, voice faltering. "This is for me…?"
"Yeah!" Ashido bounced excitedly. "Awesome, right? You're already getting famous!"
Izuku handed the phone back in silence. "I…" he hesitated. "I think I need to sit down for a moment."
He ignored the puzzled and dissatisfied cries of his classmates to collapse into his seat, staring ahead of him blankly. He couldn't think. His mind had slowed to a halt, sluggish thoughts moving like through molasses and getting lost on the way to their destination. So many swirling emotions travelled through the length of his body, making him shake with the intensely as he tried to squash them down. He didn't know what would happen if they broke free, and he was afraid to find out.
His breaths struggled to enter his lungs, caught halfway through his dry throat by the lump that had formed inside. Desperate, he pinched the skin of his wrist to calm down. Breathe. Breathe. He refused to have a panic attack in the middle of the classroom. If he did, he might just force a reset out of mortification.
Two hands slammed into his desk, and Izuku leapt for the ceiling. He swear his heart just stopped, and when his eyes landed on the person in front of him, he almost wished it had.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?"
Kacchan. Of course.
It's not like he could have one good day, for once.
Izuku forcefully sucked in a breath of air, almost wheezing in the process, and it took all his courage to confront the scowling face of his childhood bully. Kacchan's features were screwed up in an expression of barely contained rage, and Izuku stared. All his facial muscles relaxed at once as he buried his emotions beneath layer upon layer of thick blankets, and all he was left with was a flat look that betrayed nothing.
"Nothing is wrong, Kacchan," he spoke, calmly. The blonde looked at him. An eyebrow twitched, and he banged his palms on the tabletop again.
"Don't fucking lie to me, Deku!" he screamed, spit flecking across freckled cheeks. The tiniest of grimaces pulled at Izuku's mouth, and with the sleeve of his uniform, he wiped the saliva off. "'Deku Fanclub'? What the fuck is this shit? And you don't even have anything to say about it?!"
"I didn't create the website, Kacchan," Izuku informed. His voice was even, and he placed his hands on his desk flatly, one over the other. He really didn't want to deal with Kacchan's explosive outbursts right now. He'd just answer the blonde's questions as impartially as possible, and hope the he'd go away. "I'm just as confused as you are."
His angry classmate was about to yell something else, when Uraraka and Iida marched up to them. They each took up a side beside their curly haired friend, Uraraka on his left, while Iida flanked his right. They wore matching serious expressions, and Kacchan's mouth snapped shut when he saw them approach. He met them with a nasty glare, hot enough to burn.
"And what the fuck do you want?" he demanded, the tips of his fingers scraping across the tabletop, curling in simmering ire.
Uraraka took a dogged step forward, undaunted. "I want you to leave Deku-kun alone."
"Hah?" Kacchan laughed. "You think some chubby-cheeked extra like you is going to intimidate me?"
"This 'chubby-cheeked extra' almost defeated you during the sports festival," she pointed out, unfaced. "And it's not just me."
"She's right," Iida stated. He rested a hand on Izuku's shoulder, and straightened his back to tower over the ash blonde teen. "Now, I suggest you take a seat, before Aizawa-sensei arrive. I doubt he'd appreciate students picking fights in his classroom."
The sound of Kacchan grinding his teeth together was audible all the way from where Izuku sat, grating on the ears. The blonde's arms shook dangerously, and the green eyed boy wondered if he would have to get involved. Then, Kacchan tisked, and leaned away from the desk with an acrid expression on his face. His glowering stare looked as though it could melt steel, and Izuku folded into himself unwillingly.
"This isn't over, Deku," he said, a deadly promise for pain to come. Small beads of sweat formed on the back of Izuku's neck, and he bit the inside of his cheek, reminding himself to not be afraid. You're not in middle school any more.
"Actually, I think it is," Uraraka replied, a finality to her tone. "Don't ever talk to my friend again."
Kacchan actually looked surprised at that, and Izuku felt his own eyelids shoot into the back of his skull in astonishment. The classroom had grown silent, the only noise being that of a low growl in the back of a furious blonde's throat.
"And what the fuck are you looking at, huh?" he challenged, giving his silent audience a dirty look. After no one dared to make a sound, he plunged himself back into his seat without another word, slamming his chair against the floor as hard as possible.
Izuku opened his mouth, gaping. What—what just happened? Did Kacchan really just give up?
He angled his head to get a good look at both of his friends. They were still glaring at the back of his bully's head, looking as if they just smelled something rotten. Then, Iida met his eyes, and the unpleasant scowl on his face melted into a soft smile.
"If Bakugou-kun ever decides to bother you again, just know that we'll always stand beside you. So don't be afraid to ask us for anything, okay?" he spoke with such earnestness, Izuku could hardly contain the tears that threatened to spill over. But he didn't want to give Kacchan another reason to make fun of him, so with all the willpower in the world, he forced them down.
Uraraka and Iida gave him one last smile, before they returned to their desks. Izuku felt like he was floating. He imagined himself as a green balloon, soaring through the sky and resting on fluffy white clouds. It was quite a bizarre comparison, but fitting somehow. He wasn't sure if it was happiness he was feeling right now, or maybe relief. They were such foreign concepts now, to be reminded like this was almost frightening. But whatever it was—it wasn't bad. It was a nice respite from the usual black mass of doom tangled in his guts, always keeping him on his toes and worrying about the next reset. The next death.
Maybe he was proud. Not of him, but of his friends. They looked so determined, so indomitable. He knew, more than anyone, how frightening Kacchan could be when angry—and when was he not? But neither Iida, nor Uraraka, was affected by the blonde's attempts at intimidation. And that's when Izuku realized, that they would both become great heroes one day. Of course, he'd always been convinced they would. But never had he been as certain as he was now, so sure.
He thought a smile might be tugging at his face. He brought up a hand and carefully ran his fingers over the corners of his mouth just to make sure, and true enough, they were subtly arching upwards. He was glad Kacchan wasn't looking at him, for if he did, he was sure nothing would stop him from putting Izuku in his place. Not even Aizawa.
And in that moment, Izuku forgot all about his quirk. If only for a second.
Notes:
Who else wanna join Deku Fanclub, raise your hand.
Wow. Just look at this chapter. It's borderline fluffy. And again, this chapter became longer than I expected. Or rather, I was planning to write some more scenes for this chapter, but then I figured it'd probably be better to just cut it off here and put it in the next part. At least I got to write Deku Fanclub, which was one of the things I was looking forward to.
And look at my babies, standing up for their friend. ;w; I'm so proud. (And since Iida has had a good amount of screen time, expect some more Uraraka in the future.)
Chapter 19: Please.
Summary:
Izuku feels like he's dying.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
It's alright. You're fine. It's okay. You're fine. You're finefinefinefinefine—
Izuku's breathing grew ever more desperate for each second that passed. His nerves had grown numb to all sensation, and not even the pain of digging his fingers into his own scalp was distinguishable in this white noise of nothingness.
He couldn't remember how he ended up here. Why he's currently sobbing into his knees, back pressed hard against the wall behind him. Why this cloud of panic was consuming him raw, like prey and its predator.
He tried to think. Searching his memories for what led him to this point, he tried to remember.
Maybe it first began when those strangers recognized him on the train. "Hey, you're that kid! Deku—right?" Or perhaps it was one of the many conversations he overheard passing by fellow U.A. students, on the way to his classroom.
"Isn't that that crazy guy? You know, from the video?"
"He's just a first year, but he's already more famous than us third years. I'm jealous."
"Why is everyone praising him? He had no right to talk to the heroes like that."
"We should totally invite him out sometime, I bet we could get into some crazy shit!"
"Hmm, marketing him to the public should be exceedingly easy; he's already gotten a jump start after that video went viral. He could make a lot of money out of this."
"You know, I probably should say this… but don't you think Stain was kind of cool too?"
Izuku pulled at his hair—scratched his face—banged his head against the wall—dug his nails into his neck—bit his hand to muffle his pathetic whimpers. And he thought—
I'm dying.
Izuku was dying. He was sure of it. This was it—he would soon forget to breathe, and he would choke on his own despair and drown in his tears. The hallway would run red with his blood as ruined nails tore open every last pore on his body—and it would be so terrible, so horrific, that even his quirk wouldn't be able to fix it.
This was it. This was the end. There'd be no more resets. Izuku had reached his final destination, and there'd be nothing left after this. No more friends, no more heroes, no more U.A., no more deaths—
And Izuku thought,
I'm glad.
"Deku-kun!"
Abruptly, reality crashed back into Izuku all at once. His eyes flashed open—and when did he close them?—and there she was. Uraraka.
He suddenly remembered everything. Everything that happened since he discovered his original quirk, and it flitted across his retinas in a blaze of motion and agony. Like fast forwarding through a horror movie at full speed.
The sensory overload of sound and moving images alone was enough to make him flinch, his skull bursting open in a splitting headache. The shock and pain enough to break him out of his hurricane of panic, but seeing Uraraka there just sent him into another spiral of hysteria, because she saw, she
s
a
w.
He wanted to speak. He tried to, tried so hard to get a word past his taut lips. He needed to speak. But he couldn't—he couldn't, he couldn't. The only thing he could do was to shake, shake and tremble and cry—and how ugly he must look like this. How pitiful. Uraraka must be so embarrassed, knowing that her friend was this weak. That this was her friend.
But—
"Deku-kun," she sounded so sad, so worried. Izuku wanted to know what kind of expression she was making, but his vision was too blurry to make anything out, other than the beige and brown blob of color floating in front of him. "You didn't come to class. We were so worried—even Aizawa-sensei, though he tried to hide it. He told me to go look for you."
She crouched in front of him, cupping the side of his head softly. She moved so slow, and touched him so carefully. Like she was afraid he might break otherwise, like fine glass. And Izuku thought, she might be right.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, but Izuku couldn't understand why. He wanted to ask, but his body refused to follow his instructions. He hated it. Hated it. Then, he felt a circle of warmth around him, as if someone was hugging him. And it felt so safe, so soft. It was scary. He was scared. Frightened.
"I don't know what to do," Uraraka murmured into his ear. "I'm so sorry. We should have done something earlier. And I'm sorry I don't know how to help you. But please—try to breathe with me, alright?"
Izuku could feel Uraraka's chest moving against him. It expanded and compressed at a steady pace, so calm and peaceful. Subconsciously, he copied her motions, moving in time with the serene breaths of his friend. Slowly, she started to rock his body back and forth in calming motions, and the violent rattles of his body was gradually lulled into a light shiver. His sobs transformed into soft gasps, barely audible, and his eyes slowly dried as the constant flow of tears ebbed away.
But Uraraka didn't let go of him. Her grip relaxed, but she still held him close, wiping tears away with the sleeve of her uniform. She smiled at him, but it didn't hide the sadness held within her eyes.
"How are you feeling?" she asked, and it took a while before Izuku could answer. He swallowed, hating how dry and raspy his throat felt as he spoke.
"I—I'm fine. Thank you."
Uraraka's mouth turned into a soft frown. "Deku-kun... please tell me. How are you really feeling?"
"Huh?" Izuku blinked at her. "I—I'm not sure what you…"
"Please," she pleaded. Her chocolate brown eyes glistened with unshed tears, and Izuku felt like the worst person in existence. "I know you're not fine. Iida knows it too, and All Might… we all know it. I know it's not what you want to hear, but we can't help it. I know you don't want us to worry, but we care about you, you know? We can't not worry."
She pulled him in for another hug, and whispered. "We all just want you to be happy…"
A new wave of tears washed over Izuku, and he wept his woes into Uraraka's shoulder. "Why…" he sniffled. "I don't get it…"
The usually bubbly girl ran gentle fingers through his curled strands, soothing the lingering ache of his tender roots. "It's because you're kind, selfless, brave and understanding… and I know you'd do anything to protect those you care about."
She pulled away from him, just a bit. She locked eyes with his, before proclaiming, "How could we not love someone like that?"
Izuku's eyes widened. "That's not…" he muttered, quietly. "That's not me."
"You're the only one who thinks that, Deku-kun," Uraraka promised, with eyes so gentle, it made Izuku's heart ache. "But I know that's not true. We all know it. And you know I would never lie to you, right?"
"I…" Izuku averted his gaze. "Of course not, you'd never… But still, you're—"
"Deku-kun," she cut him off, and Izuku flinched. There was that stubborness in her tone that was just so Uraraka. No matter what he said now, he knew he could never change her mind. "I won't ever let anyone hurt you. Not even if that person is yourself." She was silent for a moment, before adding with just the tiniest hint of hesitation in her voice, "I think it would be good if you had someone to talk to."
Talk? For some reason, Izuku didn't think she meant with her.
"You mean a therapist, right?" he spoke, sounding much more bitter than he intended. He didn't know why the thought seemed so unattractive to him, but he knew he didn't like where this conversation was going. Maybe it was because if he did agree with her, and if he did go, it would be like broadcasting to the entire world that, hey! This kid has some serious problems! And look, he can't even solve them on his own.
Uraraka bit her lip. "Yes," she said, looking unsure for a second, before it morphed into steely determination. "I can tell by your expression that you're already against it. But please—please. I can't just stand by here and do nothing while you continue to get worse and worse. What kind of friend would I be then? What kind of hero? I—we won't be able to stop worrying about you unless we know you have someone that can help you. Someone who knows what you need. So please, please… at least give it a chance, won't you? If you're worrying about expenses or anything, I'm sure the school would be willing to provide. And if not them, I'm positive All Might would do anything in his power to make sure his favorite pupil is alright."
Izuku's face grew red, and he sputtered. "Favorite pupil?! T-that's—"
"Completely true, and I can't say I blame him. And if you agree, don't beat yourself up because you feel like a leech by having someone else pay for you. We're doing this because we want to help you, not because it's some sort of obligation."
Izuku fell silent at that. He really didn't want to talk about his problems with some stranger, but—
But if it would make his friends feel better… if they could finally stop worrying. Then… Then…
"Alright," he nodded, praying that he wouldn't come to regret this decision down the lane. "I'll do it."
Notes:
And once more, the chapter became longer than I intended. What's up with that? Well, I promised more Uraraka, and here she is! Oh boy. Our poor little sunshine child isn't looking to good though.
Edit: alright, I had to change up the formatting a bit for one part. It's nothing major, but I realized that while it looks fine on a computer screen, it looks pretty weird if you read on the phone. I'm not a 100% fan of the change I had to make, and it will still probably look a bit weird on the phone, but it should look a little better.
Chapter 20: The Truth
Summary:
Izuku meets his therapist.
Notes:
A short on this time. I'm probably gonna update You'd Be Surprised before I post the next chapter of this.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
To say Izuku was nervous about the first appointment with his therapist would be an understatement. He had to rise from his chair to take short walks across the waiting room numerous times, just because he couldn't stop squirming.
Eventually, his name was called. Inhaling deeply, he followed a tall woman waiting for him down a corridor and into a secluded room. It was fairly sparse, with minimalist design and soft colors. His therapist sat down in a mossy green chair next to a small table, and Izuku followed suit by taking the seat across from her.
She introduced herself as Kyuusai Honshitsu. This was the woman who was supposed to help him, but Izuku wondered how. She seemed nice enough, with a welcoming aura of sympathy. But there's no way she could care about all her patients like he was supposed to believe, especially someone she'd just met. Right?
Well. He wasn't here for himself in the first place, so he supposed it didn't matter. If this was what it took for people to finally stop asking him about his well being, he'd go to every meeting.
Kyuusai started their session by asking a bunch of questions, trying to determine what Izuku needed help with. He answered them all, some more hesitatingly then others. And for every answer she received, she would jot something down in a little notebook of hers. He wondered what it would say by the end of this.
Beyond hope.
By some point, Izuku must have zoned out, because Kyuusai was now calling for his attention.
"Midoriya-san?"
Izuku's pupils contracted as he regained his focus. "Y-yes?" he stuttered, wondering for just how long Dr. Kyuusai had been calling his name.
"I was wondering if there was anything on your mind that you would like to discuss," she tapped her pen on the scribbled pages of her pad. Her eyes shone with acceptance and quiet reassurances, but Izuku still couldn't shake off his doubts. It would have made him feel guilty, because she really did look like she wanted to help him, but he was getting sick of living life in an unending state of self-blame.
"No… there's nothing," he settled for, after a moment's contemplation. But Kyuusai didn't look convinced.
"I can't force you to talk about something that makes you uncomfortable," she began. "but I would like to remind you of our doctor-patient confidentiality… Anything you say to me won't ever leave this room, unless I have your explicit permission. The only exception would be if I believe you are a threat to yourself or others, in which case I can only tell the person you're threatening, or someone that can ensure your safety."
A threat to himself… does it count if he's going to come back to life, anyways?
But…
"You wouldn't believe me, even if I told you," he muttered, smiling bitterly to himself.
"My job is to listen, not tell you you're wrong," she returned, resting the notepad in her lap. "It is clear that this is something which affect you deeply. And whether I believe you or not, sharing whatever is on your mind could still help ease your burden. I'm not here to judge you, Midoriya-san. I'm here to help."
There were those eyes again. Izuku exhaled deeply—he knew she wouldn't believe him. She wouldn't. But, even so…
Anything you say to me won't ever leave this room.
Maybe, it doesn't matter what she believes. Maybe, all he needs is to… let it out.
"Well, there is one thing…" he put his elbows on the table and leaned forward, locking her eyes with his. His face eased into a neutral expression that foretold of nothing, and Dr. Kuusai's eyebrows rose just a fraction, appearing intrigued. Then,
"I can't die."
Notes:
Well, strictly speaking, Izuku can die but... Honestly, I just wanted to end this chapter with a dramatic one-liner. Besides, it's more or less true anyways.
And yeah, I'm using a minor OC, but she won't be making more appearances than necessary. We probably won't see too much of Izuku's therapy sessions, but lordy, I just needed him to tell someone about his quirk already.
I would also like to thank sondrex76 for pointing out any grammatical errors. :) I always proof read my stories before posting them, but it seems like at least one mistake always manages to sneak through...
Chapter 21: It Will Be Fine
Summary:
If he says it enough times, it must be true.
Notes:
I know I said I would be updating my other fic before this, but I didn't want to leave you with that cliffhanger for too long.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Izuku crashed down on the roof much rougher than he would have liked, but when he angled his head upwards, he was greeted by the proud and blinding smile of All Might.
"Very impressive, young Midoriya! You really left your classmates in the dust."
Surprised, Izuku bent his head over his shoulder to see the other students still struggling to catch up. Sero was the closest, but he still had about a quarter of the obstacle course left before the finish line.
"Ah… I didn't even notice," he muttered, and All Might laughed heartily. Then, before Sero could join them, the hero leaned in and spoke quietly.
"Come meet me in my office after this lesson ends. There's something important I need to talk to you about."
Izuku froze. Important? His head filled with thousand different ideas of what that could mean, and none of them pleasant. But there was one thought that stood out more than the rest; a terrible, terrible thing that couldn't happen. It flooded his stomach with enough anxiety that Izuku wouldn't be surprised if it burst right open, like a balloon with too much air.
For the rest of that day, all the way until Izuku entered All Might office, the sound of his feet hitting the floor rang through his head like a death knell. He was walking to his own execution, and all he wanted to do was to run away. His guts felt like they were crawling with bugs, and the only consolation was the mantra in his head promising him everything would be alright.
It will be fine, it sounded, over and over again until he could almost believe it. His head pounded in tact with his beating heart, and he watched helplessly as his hand pulled towards the door handle that would take him to his death. He felt possessed, his body moving all on its own and he just wanted to scream—to pull away and just run, run and run until his legs gave out under him, never to return.
But he didn't.
The door clicked open.
"I can't die."
To be honest, Izuku wasn't sure what kind of reaction he expected from that statement. Perhaps it was for Dr. Kyuusai to give him a look that said he had lost his mind, but then again, such outlandish claims must be nothing new in her profession. Maybe he expected her to look at him with pity, pity for the poor boy who can't tell fantasy from reality.
(And he wondered, if any of her other patients had ever claimed to be immortal. And he wondered, how many of those were speaking the truth.)
But whatever he might had been expecting, it didn't come. When he looked into Dr. Kyuusai's deep blue eyes, there was no pity. No sadness or confusion or whatever other emotion one could possibly expect; her gaze was impressively neutral as she added something new to her little notebook, before putting it down in her lap and observing him with a face that never betrayed a thought.
"You can't die?" she repeated, lacing her fingers together over lined sheets of paper. From the way she phrased her question, you would normally expect a tone of scepticism or condescension. But all he found was a quiet curiosity, asking him to elaborate.
Stray thoughts from earlier was still crammed into his head, swirling through it at double speed like an icy blizzard, but he felt surprisingly calm as he mulled over his options. He knew that from now on, he was playing a careful game of truths and omissions. He needed to choose his words carefully, phrasing his sentences in a way that wouldn't set the doctor's alarm bells ringing.
I can't die, he chanted. I can't die—because when I do, I just come back.
But he couldn't tell her that. Never mind the fact she would think he was insane, she might deem him a danger to himself.
"Please," Uraraka's voice echoed in his head, voice cracking at the last octave as she pleaded for his sake.
But I can't lie either.
He needed to thread carefully; one misplaced word could mean a trip to the psych ward. He couldn't let that happen, he refused to let that happen. Gods knew his friends worried about him enough as it was. But—he filled his lungs with a mouthful of air, feeling his heart rate slow, until all he knew was still placidity. It would be fine. He would be fine—because even if he messed up, even if he said the wrong thing, even if if if… He would always have his fail safe. He just had to keep trying, until he got it just right. There was nothing he couldn't fix.
"It's my quirk," he began. It was an oddly neutral statement, but one that also opened a whole new can of questions simultaneously. He knew what his official quirk registration papers said, but he didn't know if his therapist had access to it as well. Still, admitting that he possessed two quirks rather than coming up with some amazing lie as to how he obtained the magical power of immortality, the choice was obvious. Besides, it wasn't like she could force any information about One for All out of him.
It will be fine.
"It prevents me from dying. Or rather—it won't let me stay dead," it was a risky move on his part, to admit that he had, in fact, died at least once before. But it wasn't incriminating enough to force Dr. Kyuusai to breach his right of confidentiality. "No one knows about this power aside from me, and I'm not planning on telling anyone either."
Kyuusai hummed, tapping a long nail against the side of her mechanical pencil. "I can understand why you would want keep something like that to yourself," she hummed, before her impassive expression took on a more serious note. "It can't have been a pleasant experience when you first discovered it. Your survival was left to a game of luck, and if not for your quirk you would have been dead right now. It must be frightening."
"It is," Izuku nodded. He leaned in closer to the doctor, his voice dropping a few decibels as if he was afraid someone might overhear. "Everytime I die I wonder, 'Is this the end?' I don't know if there's a limit to how many times my quirk work, or if there are any conditions I need to meet to activate it that I don't know about, but have been lucky to fulfill thus far. Yet, before I even have time to finish my thought, I'm back. But you know what is the most frightening of it all?"
Dr. Kyuusai said nothing, waiting for him to give the answer to his own question.
"It's not knowing if this will ever end. If I will continue to live like this forever, because my quirk won't let me die."
Izuku belatedly realized that every part of his body had broken out in violent trembles, and the only air that could enter his lungs were from the quick, gasping breaths he so desperately took. He felt so calm earlier, he never even noticed how worked up he'd became. And yet, he couldn't find it in himself to regret his words. It felt good; finally allowing his feelings and thoughts spill free without needing to spare a thought to how this would affect the people around him. The woman observing him had moved from tapping her pencil to the block of lined paper resting under her palms, and she asked,
"Do you want to die?"
Now that was a loaded question, wasn't it? But Izuku spent a surprisingly little amount of time to come up with the answer. Because as confusing as his never ending hurricane of mixing emotions and conflicting thoughts could be, it was clear as day.
"No."
And it was the truth. No matter the dark, miserable places his thoughts oh-so often found themselves in—no matter the pain and fear and anger that was forced into his brain, he knew. Even if there was times when he just wanted to stop existing all together, he knew.
Because the thought of dying was terrifying. To think of that one second of darkness that always preceded any of his resets sent frozen spikes of all consuming fear through his spine, impaling his heart and lungs and spreading throughout his body like cold tendrils of pure dread.
For all he acted like it didn't matter anymore, he didn't want to die. Perhaps if you asked him the same question a few months earlier, the answer might have been yes. But not now; not when he'd met such fantastic people; people that believed in him, people who wanted him around. And not now, when he'd seen those same people die, for no reason other than to satisfy some sick fucker and his twisted ideals.
He caught a glimpse of Dr. Kyuusai scratching something down in her notebook as he snapped back into reality. Finishing up with a flick of her wrist, her free hand landed on the round table top separating the two, palm up and waiting. Izuku was confused for all but one second, before she explained.
"My quirk is called Empathy. It contains two components: the first being that I emit a constant aura of receptivity, which you may or may not have noticed. I'm unable to turn it off, but it's useful for making my patients comfortable and allows them to open up more easily.
"The second component is a bit more invasive, which is why I will ask for your permission before I use it. If I touch someone and focus, I can feel their emotions as if they were my own. I can't read your mind, and you won't notice a thing. But it will help me gain a deeper understanding of your feelings, and I have found it very useful for aiding patients in the past. Some emotions just cannot be put into words, but if you'd let me, you won't have to try."
Izuku's fingers twitched out of habit, and he was overcome with a strong desire to write down everything she just told him. Feeling somewhat uncertain, he asked, "Um, so how does it work exactly? You just feel what I do right now?"
"Try to think of all the things that bothers you. When you're ready, place your hand in mine. If that makes you uncomfortable, I could touch your arm or head instead. I know some patients prefer that. So long as skin contact is made, no matter how little, my quirk can be activated."
"Ah, no, that's alright," Izuku waved his arms dismissively. Then, he considered what she just told him. Think of what bothers him? That's a very broad category. There's so many things, and not all of which stems from his quirk. Old memories from his days before he entered U.A. emerged unbidden, with burning words and fists and a quirk specialist telling his mother that her son was probably quirkless. And if he wasn't, he might as well be.
A leap of faith.
But that's not why he was here. Those were old problems for another day; it could wait.
It will be fine.
He thought of U.A.'s entrance exam. It was the first time he'd ever seen another person die, but it was so long ago now, he couldn't even remember what it felt like. He thought of the USJ, and how he thought it would never end. Just an endless cycle of death and tears, for the rest of eternity. He thought of Stain, of the anger that took form inside of him like an uncontrollable creature, its ugly black silhouette suspiciously similar to that of the winged noumu he'd threatened to mutilate.
And he thought of Uraraka. Of Iida, of All Might, and even of Todoroki. One by one, his classmates and teachers scrolled across his retinas, before coming to a stop at the last person. She stared at him with big, tearful eyes and sobbed.
"Izuku."
And oh, how many times had he heard his mom cry like that? As years passed, the word began to lose its meaning, until it was more of a sob than a proper name. Just hearing it once was had been one time too much, and he would do anything he possibly could to never hear it again.
All these thoughts, all the things he had felt since he realized his hidden power, he summoned to the front of his mind. With a newfound determination, he put his hand in Dr. Kyuusai's, nodding in confirmation. "I'm ready."
She returned his gesture, and her eyes slipped closed as her facial muscles scrunched up in a look of deep concentration. But not even a second passed, before she pulled her hand away as if burnt. A hiss slipped through her teeth, and for the one instant their eyes met, Izuku saw a cold, deep horror reflecting of the dark blue of her irises. The next second it was gone, disappearing just as quickly as it came. Her face quickly schooled into a professional expression of indifference, while her hand returned to her lap as she straightened her back in some attempt of forced composure.
"Um—"
"I think I understand now," the doctor took a deep breath, and Izuku let his eyes travel down to land on the white knuckled grip of her mess of tangled fingers, curling around each other much too tight to look comfortable. They were shaking. "It's a good thing you're here, and it was very brave of you to allow me a glimpse of your emotions. I'm not going to mince words; there are a lot of things we need to work on. And while I have a feeling you may not believe me, Midoriya-san—" she paused, and slowly, her fingers begun to relax. "You're not beyond hope. And I promise—you aren't going to feel like this forever."
Izuku didn't want to believe his trust had been betrayed but, in all of that, did he make a mistake? Was it something he said, or something she felt?
Should he have reset after all?
Was it still too late?
"Young Midoriya."
Izuku jumped when he heard the familiar voice calling for him. And there he was, the skeleton form of All Might waiting for him in all his glory. His executioner. And there was no more time for speculation or theorizing, because whatever came, came.
"All Might," he returned as he made for an empty chair, dragging every step out for as long as possible, eyes glued to the hero already seated in front of him. Too soon, he reached his destination, his teacher leisurely crossing his long fingers over each other, one after the other. A heavy atmosphere fell over the room, and pin pricks of sweat dampened the back of Izuku's neck as he awaited his verdict. And then, just as he thought he was going to go insane from anticipation, All Might spoke.
"It's time I told you about All for One."
Notes:
You know, sometimes I wonder if I'm making Izuku too dramatic. Then I look back at all the shit I've put him through and think, maybe not.
Also, I would like to ask, because this has been bothering me a while, but do you think my writing have gotten better or worse? Neither? I dunno, I'm just worried my writing is actually getting worse as I progress, but that might just be me being overly critical. If you think it's gotten worse, I would appreciate it if you'd tell me why, so I can hopefully fix it.
Chapter 22: Declaration
Summary:
Bakugou decides.
Izuku refuse.
Notes:
I totally recommend listening to the Far Cry 3 OST while reading this story, because it goes really well. In fact, I was listening to it a bunch while writing.
Also, I would like to thank everyone who answered my question last time. :) I know I can be overly critical of myself, so I thought it was just best to ask what you guys think. I'm glad to see that you either seem to think the quality has stayed consistent, or even better. Don't be afraid to tell me if it ever changes though! (Maybe wait if it's just one chapter though, because it might just be that one chapter that sucks. :P)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Izuku stared into All Might's eyes, and realized something important. Something no one could understand but him.
"This man, this evil… I'm sure you too will have to fight him one day," All Might had said, something akin to shame and regret in his eyes. "It's what it means to be a wielder of One for All. It's true purpose, to defeat the greatest evil of mankind."
All Might chose him. The strongest hero put his faith in a quirkless boy, because he believed in him. And Izuku realized then, that out the billions of people on earth, there was no better choice. No one a more perfect vessel to wield One for All and defeat the greatest villain to exist, than him. Every hero and heroine that had come before him had failed, but Izuku knew, with a one hundred percent certainty, that All for One would end with him.
Because Midoriya Izuku couldn't fail.
Because Midoriya Izuku couldn't die.
The end-of-the-term test was approaching, and the fact that it had only been three months since Izuku entered the gates of U.A., donning his school uniform for the first time, hit him like a sack of bricks. It felt like a lifetime ago now—actually, make that several. The Midoriya Izuku from back then was little more than a fading memory by this point, and the first fourteen years of his life was like viewing a video filmed with a camera out of focus, only consisting of featureless and blurry swathes of color. They might as well belong to someone else. Only key parts of his childhood could still be made out clearly, and most of them, he'd rather not remember at all.
Mustering up energy to study was a challenge. Homework seemed much less important when you've watched yourself and everyone around you die a hundred times over, but Izuku didn't want his quirk to affect his life any more than it already had. Let's not add a failed written exam to the top of my problems.
There was a practical part as well, but he didn't have enough information about it to worry about it properly. He just had to handle it as it came, like with so many things these days it seemed.
He had been mumbling to himself, but grew quiet when he heard his name called. It was in a sneering tone that was all too familiar to him, and the screeching noise of chair legs scraping against the floor stung his ear drums as Uraraka and Iida rose from their seats as one, looking at Bakugou like vipers, ready to strike at a moment's notice.
Kacchan was glaring at Izuku, but made no move to approach. And ah—the blonde boy must have been talking about something, but Izuku had been too wrapped up in his thoughts to catch any of it. Thankfully, it didn't look like the hot blooded teen expected an answer, as he opened his mouth once more and spoke, loud enough for anyone to hear.
"I dunno what the fuck is wrong with you," he began, red eyes boring into Izuku as if he was trying to solve a very frustrating puzzle, and failing to boot. "You've been acting even creepier than usual, but it doesn't matter. You're still an annoying shitrag, and you always will be. No matter what weird shit you've been up to, I'm still gonna beat your score into the fucking ground on the end term exam. You hear that?!" He flung an accusing finger toward Todoroki, who had been observing the exchange in silence up to this point. "You too, asshole! Both of you are fucking dead!"
And with that declaration, he stomped out of the classroom, kicking chairs and desks along the way. Iida and Uraraka watched like hawks, all the way until Kacchan slammed the door shut behind him with a bang, and they relaxed.
"Oh man, I feel like I haven't seen that Bakugou for a while," Kirishima commented, rubbing the back of his skull and looking uncomfortable.
"Really?" Izuku wondered, looking curiously to the classroom exit. "Seems like the usual Kacchan to me." He paused for a second, thinking. Then, in a moment of liberating boldness, proclaimed, "He's wrong though. Because I'm gonna beat him."
Notes:
Izuku is too jaded to deal with Bakugou's bitch fits.
Kind of a boring chapter, but it's just a set up for the next one. And oh boy, is next chapter gonna be... exciting. >:3c
Chapter 23: End-of-Term
Summary:
The Wonder Duo.
Notes:
I was so excited after last chapter, that I finished the next one and wrote a good portion of the one after that. I was gonna publish this yesterday, but I felt kinda shitty and was too tired to proofread and edit it. But now it's here! Yay! :D
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Midoriya Izuku would curse the gods, but he already knew the world hated him.
Kacchan glared at him, like he was wont to do, and Izuku couldn't help the exasperated "Really?" that left his mouth.
Kacchan's glare deepened.
"Yes, really," Aizawa affirmed with a deep suffering sigh. "For the practical exam, the two of you will be paired together as a team. And as for your opponent…"
"That would be me!" a loud voice boomed, and Izuku didn't even need to look to know who it belonged to. Because really, there was probably no person on earth (or at least Japan) who didn't recognize that voice. Again, he repeated, "Really?"
All Might laughed, but Izuku didn't find the situation very amusing. He glanced toward Kacchan, and he could already see the disaster coming a mile away. But arguing with his teachers would do him little good, so like with everything else, he just had to accept it. Besides, there were far more precious things he could spend his time and attention on.
"Whatever," the tired boy shrugged. "Let's just get this over with."
Kacchan knocked his shoulder into his. "That's my line, shitbag."
Right, Izuku thought. As if Kacchan would cooperate so easily.
Fight or flight. Run or stay. Those were the two choices left before them, and knowing Kacchan, he would most likely only leave Izuku with one viable option.
If they stayed, they would have to fight All Might. But even with the heavy weights the hero had strapped onto his form to give his students a smidgen of a chance, there was no way they could win, if only for the simple reason that Kacchan wouldn't let them. Because the first thing he would do once the test started would be to run off on his own, ignoring Izuku completely.
Because Kacchan doesn't need help. Because Kacchan can do everything by himself. Because only weaklings have to rely on other people.
How petulant.
Maybe together, with a well thought out plan and perfect execution, they could do it. They're both smart people, and certainly not weak by any means. Of course, the likelihood of Kacchan listening to a word he said was close to zero.
Which only left running. But, if Izuku is one thing, it's stubborn. He wouldn't give up without even trying.
"Kacc—"
"Shut it," Kacchan kept on walking, not even once looking in Izuku's direction, "and fuck off. I don't need you around to weigh me down."
"You think you can take on All Might by yourself?" Izuku raised an eyebrow, because honestly, even Kacchan must realize how ridiculous that sounds.
"I'll keep dodging his attacks until he gets tired," or not, "and then, I'll knock him the fuck out the second his guard is down."
Izuku blinked, because that was truly one of the stupidest things he had ever heard. Kacchan was smarter than this, Izuku knew he was. But it seemed like just the mere presence of Deku was enough to blind his bully to everything that wasn't showing off how much stronger and better he was compared to him.
"Kacchan," Izuku said. "Are you an idiot?"
He felt the fist coming before he saw it. The air shifted, and his back pitched backwards on its own, but he wasn't quite fast enough. He avoided the worst of the damage, but the tip of his chin still got clipped painfully, and he hissed on reflex.
Before he could lose his balance and fall on his ass, he spun on his heel while his other foot shot out and moved at blinding speed. It cut effortlessly through the air in an arc, only slowing when it impacted with something soft and human, but Izuku wasn't done yet. The momentum continued to carry him forwards, pulling the weight on the dorsum of his foot with him, all the way until it slammed down into the ground.
Kacchan's head bounced off the hard surface of the floor, and Izuku screamed. "What the hell is wrong with you?"
Kacchan took a few seconds to recuperate, but Izuku wasn't going to give him a chance to retaliate. He put a foot to the blonde's chest and held him there, hard emerald eyes staring him down.
"Get the fuck off of me!" the blonde screamed, letting an explosion off against Izuku's ankle. It hurt, enough to make anyone flinch, but Izuku was too pissed to give Kacchan that kind of satisfaction. Instead, he just continued to stare, never letting his eyes leave his target.
"Is this it? Is this really how you plan to live out the rest of your life?" he spoke, as calm and chilly as ice. "You think you can just punch your way out of every problem, is that it? Of course you do. No one's ever showed you otherwise, have they?" Izuku leaned in, eyes aglow with an uncanny callousness. "But let me tell you a secret: out there, in the real world, if you continue the way you are right now… you'll be dead and dirt before you know it. Wanna know why?"
Kacchan didn't make a sound.
"Because you're never going to ask anyone for help. You'd rather die, and that's exactly what's going to happen," Izuku finally retrieved his foot, letting the explosive boy free. "But sure, if that's what you want, go ahead. Go die. After all, no one's gonna save you."
He didn't mean that. Izuku knew, that despite how much Kacchan hurt him, he'd still be there. Even if Kacchan screamed at him to leave and go away; even if Kacchan blew off his limbs one by one, he'd still be there. Because Midoriya Izuku didn't know how to stop caring, but God, he wished he could.
Caring only got you hurt, especially when the person you cared about couldn't give less of a shit about what happened to you. When that person tell you to kill yourself, and abuse you with words and fists until you wonder if maybe, he's right.
Izuku would die for Kacchan. But that didn't mean he didn't take sick satisfaction in the shocked expression directed at him, because God, it was just so perfect. The white of Kacchan's eyes on perfect display, shrunken pupils that couldn't look away, a mouth that had lost its permanent scowl in favor of the slight gape that showed off those perfect white teeth.
It filled Izuku with a sort of giddiness he hadn't felt in a long time, and it took his all to hide the grin that just begged to spring free. Serves him right, he thought, head alight with a heady intoxication of pure adrenaline. Let's see how you feel, to be on the receiving end for once.
Izuku cared. All too much, he cared. With all his soul and being—so so much that it was eating him alive, he cared.
But let Kacchan believe he didn't.
Kacchan's mouth moved. Quietly, almost like he was afraid, he spoke. "What's wrong with you?"
Then, his words were drowned out in a sea of noise and smoke. Izuku's feet lifted of the ground, and he and Kacchan flew through the air like lifeless dolls as wind carried them far and fast, slamming them down and into the ground as gravity did its work.
"Brace yourselves and pray," a deafeningly loud voice thundered across the battlefield, "for I am here."
Notes:
Izuku delivers the swift kick of justice.
Oh boy. Writing this was so much fun. I actually wrote the Deku-Kacchan Discourse™ a while back, and I gotta say... writing the fun parts of the story before I go back and add the more boring parts really help motivate me to finish the chapter, because I just want to publish it already. Anyways... I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it. >:3c My my, next chapter sure is gonna be fun!
Chapter 24: Determination
Summary:
Izuku wants to win.
Chapter Text
Everything happened so fast, Izuku barely had time to register it. As soon as they hit the ground, Kacchan was already on the offensive. His attention honed in on All Might, and with a feint and a surprise attack, it almost looked like he could make it.
He didn't.
Before either boy could blink, All Might had already countered the attack, and Kacchan was back on the ground. Izuku had no doubt who would be next, when All Might ominously and deliberately turned his powerful body in his direction.
"Are you going to fight?" he smiled, but there was no kindness behind it. "Or will you abandon your friend and run?"
It was tempting, so fucking tempting to just bolt and leave Kacchan with this mess he was so keen to get himself into. And it wasn't like all those other times—he could run, and Kacchan would be fine. Perhaps a few bruises, some broken bones at most, but he would be fine.
Because All Might was no real villain, as much as he tried to play the part. Because Izuku had seen what real villains do, and it's a kind of evil no one who didn't truly mean it could emulate.
But, in the end, the instincts which had been so painfully beaten into him with each additional reset he had to endure won out. He could run, but if the only way Izuku could win this was by leaving someone behind, he didn't want to. Don't misunderstand, it wasn't that he felt some kind of obligation toward Kacchan to stay. Rather, with the loud mouthed blonde by his side or not, Izuku had already made his decision.
Because he knew, that sooner or later, he would have to face a foe stronger than a weakened All Might playing pretend bad guy. And unlike his teacher, they weren't going to hold back. And they sure as hell wouldn't show any mercy.
So, he stayed. Even if it meant he would fail the exam, he stayed. For there were worse things out there than a bad grade and his idol's disappointment.
"As if," he bit out scornfully, the power of One for All lighting up the dusty battlefield with hues of bright green. Charging All Might head on was out of the question—Kacchan tried, and despite his rather (admittedly) clever tactic, All Might had countered it with minimal effort.
If Izuku wanted to win, he needed to be smart. Smarter than Kacchan, and smarter than All Might.
For the moment, he dashed backwards, just as Kacchan flew over his head with a series of explosions launching him forward, like a malfunctioning rocketship. And this, despite Kacchan's best intentions, left Izuku with a opportunity too perfect, he'd be damned if he missed it.
Not unexpected, All Might made quick work of the explosive user's frontal assault. The blonde had attempted another faint, before thrusting a hand downwards and with a boom, launched himself into the air in an attempt to catch the pretend-villain in the back. It reminded Izuku of their first battle trial, when Izuku had played the hero and Kacchan the villain, except this time, it wasn't as successful. Because All Might was the Number One Hero, not just some Deku.
All Might ducked the explosion that flew overhead, singing a few of his golden blond strands, before grabbing a hold of the attacking teen's wrist and flung him to the side like dirty laundry. When his attention turned back to Izuku, the boy was nowhere to be found.
"Did the little hero run after all?" he questioned out loud, scratching his chin. "That doesn't seem right…"
His head snapped to the right, smashing the huge slab of concrete coming his way just in time before it could cause any damage.
"Smart, but you're going to have to try better than that, my boy…"
All Might didn't have time to finish his sentence, because before the hero-villain even opened his lips, Izuku was already putting his next move into action. Too distracted by the flying piece of cement, All Might didn't realize that by the time the projectile had been launched, Izuku had already left his position long ago.
Behind you, he thought, fighting the nagging urge to say it out loud. Announcing your sneak attacks was something that only happened in movies, for no one would be so idiotic as to ruin the surprise of catching their opponent off guard just so they could look cool. Not daring to hold back, he drove his fist into All Might's right side as hard as he could without breaking his bones in the process. For a brief moment, he'd considered aiming for his weak spot, but that move was only useful because Izuku knew about it beforehand. Fighting a real villain, it was doubtful he'd have that kind of information. There's no point if I can't use it in a real fight.
All Might dashed off to safety, mitigating the worst of the damage. "I'll give you that one," he coughed lightly, wiping the corner of his mouth. "But the same move won't work twice. You're going to have to come up with something new if you want to get me a second time."
Easier said than done. The only reason this move even worked in the first place was because Kacchan inadvertently gave him the opportunity. But if he could use Kacchan's recklessness to his advantage once, then maybe—
"Out of my way, Deku!"
Izuku had less than a second to dive out of harm's way, before Kacchan tore past him in a trail of flickering lights. He squinted his forest green eyes as the brightness burned his retinas, and he almost missed the way Kacchan dodged All Might's grabbing hands narrowly, by firing off a blast to his left and letting the momentum carry him to safety. His feet hit the ground, and a black boot kicked up a cloud of sand and dust into his opponents face. He didn't waste any time retrieving his leg from the air, but instead moved his hands behind him and set both of them off at the same time. His other foot came up to join the first, and he delivered an explosive-aided drop kick to All Might's face.
The fake-villain moved to grab his ankles, but Kacchan swung his arms from behind his back to aim them downwards, and still balancing atop All Might's face, set off two big blasts in his direction, stunning the Symbol of Peace temporarily.
Kacchan smiled victoriously and jumped off his teacher, ready to set off his quirk once again aimed from behind. His victory was short lived however, because quick as lightning, All Might spun on his heel, and landed a devastating blow straight into his abdomen. The explosive teen hacked up the contents of his stomach, and before he could recover, All Might sent a burst of wind his way, carrying the teen until he smacked shoulders first into a half crumbled building.
"That's not gonna work," All Might grinned, and before Izuku had time to react, the flat of his teacher's palm cut through the air in a backwards moving arc, sending waves of wind pressure along the way, continuing until it met with Izuku and sent him off. "You two sure like trying to attack me from behind, don't you? How unheroic. And you sure don't waste any time either; I almost didn't catch you in time, Midoriya my boy!"
Shit, Izuku cursed. He had tried to use Kacchan's assault to his advantage to sneak in an attack on All Might whilst he was distracted, but after so many hits and attempted hits from behind, the hero was on high alert.
I need him to lower his guard again, he realized. Or else, I'm never gonna get another chance.
Izuku wheezed as all air left his lungs at once, because suddenly, Kacchan was on him. He'd driven his form into the other boy's side, and he shouted, "I told you to piss off, Deku!"
Is he for real? Izuku thought in disbelief. That whole conversation, and he still haven't learned anything?
Izuku wasn't just going to let the blonde punch him around as he pleased. The back of his hand slapped hard across Kacchan's cheek, and in anger, returned, "Why don't you piss off?! So far, all I'm seeing you doing is letting All Might smack you around like you're his personal punching bag!"
Which, okay, that might have been too far. It wasn't even true, not really, and Izuku had taken his share of blows as well. He was just so angry, he couldn't stop himself from returning every spitfire word thrown in his face right back. So, he hit him right where he knew it would hurt.
This is what it must feel like to be Kacchan.
He didn't like it. But, it was also liberating, in a cruel and selfish sort of way. But it was a satisfaction that only lasted temporarily, and as addicting as it was, he knew he would come to regret it later.
"You're fighting the wrong opponent!" All Might didn't give them any further warning, before another push of air blasted them away.
This sucks, Izuku thought as he awaited his painful decent. It's not fair at all.
But since when had Izuku's life ever been fair?
When the two students crashed into the rocky rubble of the ruined city, Izuku knew what he had to do. It pissed him off, but if he wanted to win this, there was no other way. And for once, just once, he really wanted to win. Without an iota of doubt about his victory, he wanted to win.
Before either of them could fully recover, Izuku's hand was already clutching Kacchan tight in his grip. He ran, not to flee, but he needed some time to think.
He stopped, panting hard, hiding behind a building that balanced on its foundation precariously. He dropped the struggling blonde by his feet, and breathing heavily, said, "Kacchan, please, for once, can we just work together?"
Kacchan glared, but it wasn't quite his usual burning stare. Something seemed different about it, hesitant almost. Izuku continued.
"You won't ever have to talk to me again after this. But don't you want to win? Don't you want to win against All Might?" he grinned, big and wide, "Not just something small, but absolute, obliterating victory?" his fist clenched tight, and his eyes was filled with white hot determination, "I don't care what you have me do. Just tell me, and I'll fucking do it. I want to win."
"Christ, Deku," Kacchan looked at him like he didn't know who he was. "I knew something was going on with you, but seriously, what the fuck? Since when did you want to obliterate All Might?"
"Since I decided that if I'm able to do that, then I might stand a chance."
If possible, Kacchan looked even more confused. "A chance? A chance against what? What the hell are you planning?"
Izuku looked thoughtful for a second. Then, "To survive."
Notes:
You know, it's kind of funny. Considering how much gore and bloody violence this story contains, this is probably the first proper fight scene I've written. And by god, it was fun. And it's not even over yet. The real fun part is gonna come next chapter. >:)
Chapter 25: Demolition Synergy
Summary:
"This is fucking crazy," Kacchan repeated.
Notes:
Holy shit, I'm alive! Betchu weren't expecting that. Tbh, I'm not sure I was either. Sorry that it took so long. I was just so excited to get to this chapter, and then it didn't turn the way I had envisioned and I kinda lost motivation. :( Well, it's out now. Let's see how long I can keep going.
Chapter Text
"This is fucking crazy," Kacchan muttered, but the sharp grin on his face was telling. "This is fucking crazy."
"So… you're actually going along with it?" Izuku knew the question ran the risk of pissing the other teen off, but he never expected Kacchan to look so excited.
"The fucking expression on his face is going to be priceless," he said, and Izuku wasn't sure if it was an answer to the question, or the blonde just thinking aloud and ignoring him completely. Kacchan nodded his messy hair of spikes silently, as if already imagining it. Which, knowing him, he probably was. "Just don't fuck this up, because I sure as hell ain't gonna carry you out of there."
"So long we get All Might, it's fine," Izuku assured. "Then you can just run for the exit."
Kacchan looked at him, as if offended. "Always the same self-sacrificing asshole," he sneered, and Izuku realized his mistake.
Quickly, before he had the time to work himself into a rage, Izuku corrected himself. Meeting the crimson gaze glaring daggers into him, he answered in a tone with unwavering resolve laced around every letter. "I'm not gonna fail, Kacchan."
"That's what I fucking thought," he answered with a nod. "Now come on—let's fucking destroy him."
All Might scratched his chin, eyes scanning the concrete rubbles and crumpling buildings that made up the destroyed landscape around him. "Hmm… now where could those two be hiding…?"
One ear perking up, he gyrated his broad body to greet approaching footsteps. "Ah, Midoriya, my boy!" he welcomed, before tilting his head to the side and cupping his chin thoughtfully. "Now let's see, where is that angry friend of yours?"
"Not here," Izuku replied, not missing a beat. His lips were pressed tight together in a thin line of displeasure, and he eyed his teacher cautiously. "You know, pairing the two of us together was really cruel, All Might."
His name was uttered like a dirty word, and All Might forced a strained chuckle, eyes flickering nervously from the boy in front of him to the many jagged piles of debris scattering the destroyed battle grounds. "Not my idea, young man! But you know, a professional hero must have the ability to adapt to any situation—even unsavory teammates!"
"Oh—so I'm the one that needs to adapt?" Izuku walked with leisurely steps toward the not-villain, gravel crunching under his heel with every meticulous step. He paused by a wrinkled guard railing, which despite all the abuse it had endured, was still valiantly fighting to stand in the cracked concrete ground, as everything else fell apart around it. Izuku ran his gloved fingers over it carefully, feeling it shift precariously beneath them. "That's funny. I'm not the one who attacked his ally when things didn't go my way. Ah—but I did fight back. Was that wrong of me? Am I not allowed to defend myself? Should I have just let him keep punching me until he was satisfied?" Izuku smiled sardonically, hand closing around the metal bar resting between his fingers.
All Might coughed into his fist awkwardly. "Now now, that's not what I—" he started, before cutting himself off when he realized he didn't know how to proceed. "What I mean is… what I'm trying to say—"
The hero's teeth clamped painfully over the tip of his tongue in surprise when a deafeningly loud explosion rang out behind him. Instantly, his head whipped backwards hard enough to give him whiplash, but Izuku forced the attention back on him with a loud shout and a gust of wind.
"Don't turn your back on me, All Might!"
It was just in time that his teacher managed to concentrate his focus back on his student, and his reflexes forced his arms up to shield him from the worst of the damage, while his heels dug deeply into the ground to dampen the effect of the windy assault.
Izuku's teeth bit down on the inside of his cheek, and he flinched in pain as his finger turned a mottled purple, skin and muscle swelling unevenly around the broken bone.
"Khhh—" he held back the urge to curse, focusing instead on his next course of action. He couldn't waste any time; he needed to move, now!
Another explosion, and Izuku ripped out the barely standing railing, which was still being held tight in his grip, before charging his opponent with soulful determination. Despite himself, All Might's attention had been stolen away from Izuku a second time that day, and his blue gaze was searching for a loud mouthed blonde he was sure to find hiding somewhere between the jagged edges of ruined houses.
Izuku grinned, almost manic from all the adrenaline pumping through his veins. With uncontained excitement, he whispered, "I warned you, All Might…" before wrapping steel bars around the muscular arms and torso of his hero, creating a makeshift prison, and caging the Symbol of Peace inside. But, just as easily as Izuku folded the fence to his will, as easily would it be for All Might to break free.
Despite that, the short amount of time Izuku would buy from All Might attempting to break away from his grasp was their only hope. Every tiny little second counted. It just had to be enough.
Because that was all he needed. A second—just a second, once he let go. But for now, he needed a few more.
So, he holds on. With all the strength he could muster, he squeezes the person in his arms as hard as he possibly could. With his legs, his arms, his whole body, he holds on to the golden hero for dear life.
Just a little longer.
He could feel his bones creaking and muscles stretch, far enough that he swore he could the tiny fibres in them tearing as All Might continued to struggle.
Just a little longer.
A final blast of fire and smoke, and finally, it's falling. Kacchan had done it. Izuku watched in awe and fear, eyes wide and mouth agape as the giant skyscraper broke in two. Almost as if in slow motion, it began to fall, and Izuku found himself frozen by the sight. It was pure destruction, glass and stone alike breaking apart and soaring through the air in a hail of debris, with the giant shadow of the remaining building just beneath, blocking out the sun and highlighting the carnage.
Izuku couldn't hold on any longer. It was time to let go.
His fingers unclasped from skin tight spandex, limbs relaxing and crying with pain and relief all at once as he dropped to the ground. As soon as he felt the first contact of his heavy boots touching the floor, he dug his heels in and let his legs fall into a squat, before springing like a coil. His dark green curls lashed against his cheeks as he thrusted backwards, and in morbid amazement, he watched as pieces of heavy concrete, both tiny and small, crashed like meteors in a shower of rubble. When they hit the ground, it kicked up both dust and shrapnel, which surrounded All Might and hid the hero in a sandy cloak. Izuku had to squint hard as tears sprung into the corners of his eyes, doing their best to ease the burning irritation caused by the polluted air.
It worked, he realized, the thought moving sluggishly in a dense pool of disbelief. But when it finally reached him, the awe and incredulously washed away to uncover a hiccuping laugh that made his chest feel like it was filled with soda, bubbling with amazement. Because finally, there was a chance. The mad plan he and Kacchan had struggled together with actually worked.
They might actually beat All Might.
As soon as his body hit the ground, he ran. With all the strength his legs could carry, he ran, never once daring to look back. He didn't know if the shattered building had pulled the hero down with it, trapping him beneath the rubble. He didn't know if All Might had already managed to dig himself free.
A pit in his stomach, like vacuum inhaling everything around it, made him hollow with the worry that, maybe this was too far? Were they making a mistake? It was a concern he didn't want to feed, because this was All Might. Of course he'll be fine. Was he really so conceited as to think he could seriously harm the Number One Hero?
And more than that, it was the nervous flutter in his limbs that licked his flesh in warm, pleasant tickles that didn't want to—didn't want to consider how dangerous this plan might actually be. Because it was the only thing he could think of. It was the only thing that might give them a chance.
In the corner of his eyes, he saw a flash of blonde as Kacchan joined him by his side. A crazy grin cracked across his face, and he cackled in delight. "Holy shit," he swore, eyes meeting Izuku's. "Did you see that shit?"
It was a rhetorical question of course, so Izuku settled to answer it with a wide smile of his own. For one moment, whatever past they might have didn't matter, as they shared in each other's success, laughing in victorious glee.
The laughter stopped as Kacchan suddenly pulled to a stop, and whipping his head back, he cursed. "Fuck." Izuku joined him in halted movements, gaze joining the blonde's and grimacing at the sight of All Might speeding toward them. His imposing form was covered in bleeding scrapes and bruises, his costume torn in several places and just the tiniest hint of a limp left leg. His smile was strained, clashing sharply with the bright anticipation lighting up the vivid blue of his eyes. He was watching his students with acute focus, growing ever larger the more he closed in on them.
"Get behind me!" Kacchan shouted brashly, bringing his hands up in front of him and squaring his stance. Izuku followed without a word, knowing better than to ask questions. "I'm gonna give this fucker an explosion big enough that he won't have a choice but to dodge!" He grinned, narrow pupils fixated on the rapidly approaching form of their opponent. "When I tell you to, pull the pins of both of my gauntlets! You got that, you overly obsessed fanboy?!"
"Got it," Izuku acknowledged, brushing off the insult and maneuvered his arms under Kacchan's, preparing the grenade like gloves the same way he'd seen the other do so many times. His fingers curled around the metal loops, cold against his sweaty skin, and ready to pull at any moment.
All Might's eyes increased in size, seemingly having caught on to their plan, but it was too late. "Now!" Kacchan screamed, and Izuku's senses quite literally exploded in a mix of heat, noise and blinding light as both Kacchan's hands went off at once, which joined the gauntlets in creating a massive blaze made out of pure glory and destruction, consuming all in it's path.
The power was enough to bring both students down with it, forcing their feet off of the ground and up into the air. But Izuku, having taught himself to never let a bad situation go to waste, seized the opportunity.
The exit was at their backs, but even with the force of the explosion, it would not be enough to carry them to victory. So, he gritted his teeth, and while he could still feel his toes touching the ground, pushed off as hard as he could. With the power of One for All and the burning backlash of Kacchan's quirk, they were sailing toward the exit at a dangerous speed. Wrapping his arms ever tighter around his partner's torso, all Izuku could do was pray, please let this be enough.
"Fuck," Kacchan choked as Izuku's limbs dug into his torso, and he probably would have turned his head to glare at him if he could. "Give me a fucking warning next time before you pull some shit like that, would you?!"
"No time," Izuku dismissed, squinting through blonde strands. He'd lost feeling in the lower half of his feet, but it was easy to ignore with the adrenaline fueling his mind and body. "Can you see him? Did you get him?"
"Of course I got him," Kacchan replied with a huff, but his eyes surveyed the horizon intently for a telltale flash of golden blonde or electric blue. It was hard to see anything through the hair lashing across their faces and the black smoke still floating like a thick curtain over the fake city, but their senses were set on high alert for the first sign of trouble.
Izuku looked behind him, and saw the hard ground approaching rapidly. "Time to land," he warned, bracing his legs. After that, it was only a few more meters to the exit, and they would be home free. Assuming he didn't break his legs before then, that is.
His soles slammed into the unforgiving asphalt, sending shocks of pain rocking throughout his bones. The smell of burnt rubber entered his nose as his feet skid along the ground, and he locked his teeth together in a pained grimace as he fought against gravity's best attempts to topple them over like pink domino pieces.
"What the fuck—" Kacchan hissed, and Izuku yelped as the back of his heel caught in an uneven crevasse in the ground. Their bodies tilted backwards, just barely missing the large piece of rubble flying over their heads.
The air was forcefully stolen from Izuku's lungs as his back hit the ground, and Kacchan crashing on top of him. The blonde quickly rolled off, cursing loudly all the while. "Jesus Christ, that fucker just doesn't give up, does he?!" he blared, throwing a heated glare toward the rock that just missed them by a few centimeters. Then, he turned it towards the dark cloud it escaped from.
A dark chuckle reverberated through the broken streets and black dust as the towering silhouette of All Might could just be hinted at through the smoke, before it cut off to a muffled cough. Izuku stared intently into the darkness, opening his mouth.
"He can't have much more in him," he said, his eyes a wild green and gleaming with the words he kept repeating in his head. Can't give up, can't give up, gotta win, gotta win!
"Then why the fuck are we still standing here?" Kacchan snarled, pulling him to his feet. "We're almost there. If we lose now, I swear I'm gonna kill you."
Izuku snorted, casting his eyes to Kacchan's sour expression. "Yeah, that might work."
They ran. His feet felt numb, yet every step shot sparks of pain through his legs. He was sure to get an earful from Recovery Girl later. He glimpsed behind him, and was met with the cold blue eyes of All Might bearing down on them.
He didn't say anything. He just grabbed Kacchan by the black of his tank top, and feeling the electric rush of One for All pour through his arm, he threw.
Kacchan made a strangled noise of surprise as he gravitated into the air, only a few more steps from the exit. All Might reached his arm out, large looming hand rapidly closing in on his green haired student.
"Oh no, you fucking don't!" Izuku could hear Kacchan shout in front of him, as he twisted his body mid-air. "Duck!"
He did. The stench of burning hair invaded his nostrils, and beads of sweat broke out across his scalp like salty raindrops. Scorchingly hot air filled the space above him and he blinked his eyes, attempting to soothe the burning dryness. Then, he righted his back and continued to run, and he could feel the hovering presence of All Might disappearing behind him.
His mind blank of everything but reaching the exit with Kacchan. He can do it. He can. Both he and Kacchan will make it out of here, no retries, no resets. No one left behind.
A bloodied and blistered hand reached out to him. His brain had shut down long ago, and his body was running on autopilot. The edges of his vision were dotted with black, and all he could see was that hand. He'd forgotten who it belong to, but it didn't matter.
He took it.
Kacchan pulled, and they both lost their balance and tumbled on top of each other. The blonde sputtered in indignation, but Izuku was too damn exhausted to do anything about it. His throat burned as he breathed, and he was inhaling so much air he thought his lungs might burst, with limbs like jelly.
Kacchan pushed him off harshly and let him roll on to his back. "Get off you twerp!" he complained, but he was too winded to put any real bite behind it. Instead, he opted to join Izuku in the frantic attempts to catch his breath, which formed an almost companionable silence, aside from the heavy breathing that tainted it.
The sound of gravel scraping against each other entered their ears, and All Might was looking down at them. A giant smile lit up his face, a complete dissonance with the rest of his marred and battered appearance.
"Congratulations!" he boomed, smile stretching impossibly wider. Bright crimson reflected of his teeth and dripped slowly down the corner of his mouth, but he didn't even seem to notice. "You both pass!"
Chapter 26: Aftermath
Summary:
Aizawa stared at them, eyes dark. "I watched the footage."
Notes:
Oh my, is this another chapter already~? ;3c
Chapter Text
Izuku looked like a fish gaping for air, mouth open in disbelief. He knew what it meant once he crossed that finish line, but he never thought he would actually make it. Kacchan's expression was neutral like stone, but his clenching fists betrayed the emotion he couldn't hide, spilling out of them like the tiny lines of crimson dripping from his palms to the tip of his fingers.
"You really surprised me with that falling building!" All Might smiled, before his face suddenly took on a more serious tone. "That being said, while your tactic might have worked on the basis of this being a simple exam, I'm sure you know as well as I that this could never be used in a real life scenario. For that, not to mention your recklessness, I have to give you a few demerits." Kacchan tsked. "Still, as you did follow the rules of the exam, you both pass!" The hero's smile pulled taught over his cheeks, pearly whites gleaming like diamonds in the sun. His dark pits surveyed his two students, and with a bright expression of relief and pride, he proclaimed, "Wonderful teamwork, you two!"
As predicted, after Izuku and Kacchan had been forcibly whisked away to the nurse's office, Recovery Girl dished out a biting lecture about "understanding your own limits" and that "recklessness will only get you killed". It was interesting to see someone else on the receiving end of the her ire for once, Izuku thought, and the fuming blonde looked like he was about ready to implode.
Kacchan's hands were wrapped in layers of bandages, and swimming in a hefty amount of salves to ease the pain and speed up the healing process. Izuku's feet and legs found themselves in the same predicament, and he momentarily considered never moving again. Every little twitch of his torn muscles felt like someone firing a flamethrower aimed specifically at his nerve endings. Maybe I can find a job as a living statue, he thought, wincing.
Not long after Recovery Girl finished her treatment, Aizawa walked through the door together with a sheepish All Might at his heels. Izuku raised an eyebrow at them, which Aizawa met with a dead eyed stare.
Kacchan was wearing his usual expression of displeasure, and with a scowl at the teachers, he barked out an annoyed, "What?"
Aizawa's eyes landed on searing red, and for a moment, he was just silent. Then, with a deep frustrated sigh, he spoke. "I watched the footage of your match," he eyed them coolly. "Your behavior was unacceptable."
"Now now Aizawa, they did—" All Might began, but cut himself off when he received a tired glare in response.
"Don't try to make excuses, All Might. They need to hear this, and you know it as well as I do."
All Might peered at his students, looking guilty, but ultimately sighed and nodded his head in acquiescence. "No, you're right. Please excuse me; I got too caught up in the moment."
Aizawa hummed, and his attention returned to the two teens frowning up at him from their hospital beds. The teacher's dark eyes zeroed in on Kacchan, finding their first target as he shot off his lecture. Izuku observed silently, watching as crimson eyes began to twitch in frustration.
"Bakugou. You attacked your teammate, unprovoked. And no, finding him annoying doesn't count as a 'provocation'," he snapped, before Kacchan could open his mouth. "I shouldn't have to tell you why this sort of behavior is unacceptable, especially for someone studying to be a hero, but you've proven me wrong." Kacchan lowered his head, but continued to glare hotly at his teacher. Aizawa continued, "You're supposed to be fighting villains, not each other. What if your little spat caused you to fail? What if the villain escaped? What if your inability to control your own emotions caused someone's death?" with each word his eyes burrowed deeper into Kacchan's. "In a real battle, even the tiniest distraction could be the difference between life and death. You don't become a hero because you want to fight. You become a hero because you want to save lives."
As the last words left Aizawa's mouth, Kacchan's face drained of emotion, and he started blankly at his teacher's back as he turned to Izuku. The green haired boy met the disapproving stare with eyes tired enough to challenge the infamous insomniac.
"What did I do wrong this time?" he drawled out, and Aizawa narrowed his dark eyes on him.
"Don't test me. While I understand defending yourself, know your boundaries. When you put your foot on Bakugou after you already knocked him down, was that in self defense?"
Izuku raised a corner of his mouth into a weary smile, and answered. "Yes. Do you think he would have just given up after I kicked him into the pavement?" he glanced to the boy in question, expecting a hail of red daggers thrown his way. But Kacchan still had that same unreadable expression on his face, and Izuku frowned. He looked back at his teacher.
Aizawa did not look amused.
"Is that so?" he spoke slowly. "And in that moment, was that what you were thinking? Were you attempting to de-escalate the situation?"
Izuku shrugged. "Kacchan is hard to de-escalate. He's like a handgrenade—once the pin is pulled, it's too late to stop the explosion." He eyed his teacher consideringly. "I gave him some advice."
"Advice?" Aizawa repeated, raising an eyebrow inquisitively. "And what sort of advice did you give him?"
Izuku looked at Kacchan again. Then, "I told him that if he continues the way he does now, it's not gonna end well for him," he turned back to Aizawa. "Or do you disagree, Aizawa-sensei?"
Aizawa didn't answer.
"Deku-kun!" "Midoriya-kun!"
He was still in the nurse's office when his friends ran up to him, worried looks on their faces. Uraraka threw a suspicious glare Kacchan's way, but he ignored her. She turned her attention back to Izuku. Conspiratorially, she leaned close and spoke in a hushed voice.
"What happened? Did he do something? Did he hurt you?" she cracked her knuckles menacingly. "If he did, just tell us, and we'll take care of the rest."
Iida waved his hands, looking aghast. "We won't be using violence! That's unbecoming of future heroes!" he whisper-shouted, not addressing the the fact that a large chunk of a hero's career consisted of violence. Still, they understood his intention, and didn't comment on it. "Of course, I'm not saying that we'll let him get away with it! We just have to go through the proper channels, like professionals."
Izuku didn't quite understand why, but a soft giggle burst through his lips, and he moved his hand up to cover it. His friends watched him, their serious expressions brightening at the sight of his eyes crinkling in amusement. Not wanting to lie—says the liar—to his friends, Izuku answered truthfully. "Well… he did."
Immediately, his classmates faces turned sour, looking like they just stuffed a lemon in their cheeks. But before they could storm over to Kacchan and give him an earful, Izuku cut in. "But it's alright! It doesn't bother me anymore."
Uraraka looked at him, the start of angry tears pricking the corners of her eyes and she clenched her fists. "That doesn't make it alright! You don't have to force yourself to forgive someone just because you think that's what a hero does. Because it's not!"
Izuku's eyes hardened, but quickly softened when he saw her concerned expression. He sighed. "That's not what I'm doing," he smiled at them, a genuine, though bitter-sweet, smile. "Really, I'm fine. Actually… I'm glad what happened did happen. I feel…" his gaze turned to Kacchan. He had his back turned to them, laying in the hospital bed, head to the wall. Izuku rested his eyes on him a moment, before turning away. "I feel like something important happened today," he settled. "It was a rough start, but in the end, we managed to work together. We defeated All Might.
"It was… fun."
Uraraka and Iida met each other's stares, curious and concerned all at on once, then looked at Kacchan. They shook their heads, and then they were gushing about how their own exams went. Mina, Kirishima, Kaminari and Sero burst in just seconds later, fighting to be the first through the door and loudly talking over each other as they crowded around Kacchan, who barked at them to "piss off".
Izuku listened intently as Iida described his match against Power Loader, his wild gesticulating painting a very vivid image. Kacchan continued to be bombarded with questions, and despite all his complaining, he answered most of them, though somewhat dismissive. Eventually, Recovery Girl came in and told them to keep it down, and to not bother still recovering patients.
Izuku's chest felt light. His muscles still ached painfully, but it was like fuzzy background noise now.
For a moment, Izuku felt at peace.
Chapter 27: Intermission
Summary:
Izuku meet with Dr. Kyuusai.
Notes:
It's a short one this time... next one is probably also gonna be pretty short as well, but don't worry, I think you'll like it. >:) I already have the majority of it written, so it should hopefully come out soon.
Tbh, this chapter isn't super important. It's an "intermission" for a reason. But I still wanted to include it. And hopefully, you'll still enjoy it!
Chapter Text
Dr. Kyuusai smiled at him as he sat down. "How have you been doing since we last met?" she asked, hands folded over her blue little notebook.
Izuku mulled over the question for a while, considering his answer. Finally, "Its been… good."
Kyuusai jotted something down. "Did something special happen?" she wondered, eyes raising to meet his.
"We had the end-of-term exam at U.A.," Izuku provided, and his therapist looked intrigued.
"It must have been pretty stressful. But judging from your response, you seem to have done well," she tilted her head slightly and tapped her pencil to her cheek. "I'm curious. What does the end-of-term exam of the most prestigious hero school in Japan entail?"
"Well, first there's the written exam," he began. "It's pretty much what you'd expect. Lots of questions about quirk laws and the history of heroics… along with some more general subjects. Then there's the practical exam," he smiled at the memory. "We were paired in individual teams to fight against one of our teachers, pretending to be a villain."
"That sounds pretty extreme," the doctor commented. "I heard every teacher at U.A. is a pro-hero. Did they at least take it easy on you?"
"Well… I wouldn't say they 'went easy' on us…" the boy scratched the back of his skull. "But they did provide us with alternative means to complete the exam, without having to beat them in a straight up fight."
"Who was your opponent?"
"All Might."
Dr. Kyuusai looked impressed. "And you won?"
Izuku nodded. "It wasn't easy… of course. Actually, I didn't think it was possible. Especially not when…" he cut himself of suddenly, but the woman's keen eyes did not miss a beat, and her pupils narrowed.
"Was there a problem?" she prompted, notebook up and ready.
Izuku avoided her gaze, staring into a corner of the room. Dust had gathered between the crack where the wall strips met, and he studied it like a modern piece of art. Finally, still considering the small spots of dirt that stained the white varnish, he said simply, "My teammate."
Dr. Kyuusai frowned. "This person, you don't get along well?"
Izuku shook his head mutely, green curls softly whipping his cheeks. Then, tilting his chin up, he stared through the window, watching green trees swaying calmly back and forth in the wind. "We did."
The doctor put her book in her lap, concentrating on him. "What changed?"
"It's complicated," he answered vaguely. "We used to be friends. But then, when everybody started to get their quirks except for me… I guess I wasn't important any more. I just became a boring, useless Deku…"
"You've known them for a long time, then. How did they feel about you entering U.A.?"
Izuku snorted. "I'm lucky his quirk isn't killing people just by looking at them."
The woman's eyebrows furrowed, and she grimaced mildly. "Not good then."
A soft laugh escaped the boy's chest, and Dr. Kyuusai looked startled, before a pleased smile soothed her face. She retrieved her notebook and moved her pencil over the paper, while she continued her questioning. "How was it, working together with him against All Might?"
"He punched me."
His therapist paused, eyes leaving her page to meet orbs of green.
"So I kicked his head into the pavement."
She lowered her hands. "Now I'm even more curious to know how you managed to pass the exam."
Izuku leaned back in his seat, eyes fixed to the ceiling, staring at nothing. "I guess I managed to talk some sense into him… whatever I said, it was enough to convince Kacchan to work with me. At least temporarily." He smiled placidly, and his eyes met Kyuusai's. "I'm not sure if anything between us has changed, but…" he clenched his hands over one another and his head lowered subconsciously. "I want to believe that it has."
He wasn't sure when the tears started, or even why, until the doctor offered him a white tissue box with a sympathetic look on her face. He took it gratefully, quickly scrubbing the wet saline off of his cheeks.
Kyuusai laid her blue block on the table, and extended a slim hand toward him, a mellow expression on her face. "Do you mind if I use my quirk on you?" she asked. "Usually, we have patients fill out blankets asking them how they're feeling, but I feel that this is much more accurate."
Izuku inhaled a final sniffle and nodded, putting the tissues down on the table. "O-okay," he murmured, letting his hand fall in hers.
Like the first time they met, she closed her eyes and let her quirk to its work. She didn't pull away hastily from him with a terrorized look in her eyes this time, but instead held him with a considering expression and eyebrows furrowed lightly in concentration. Eventually, she let him go, and slowly opened her eyes.
"I'm glad you're feeling better," she said, and picked up her notebook.
Chapter 28: Someone Familiar
Summary:
Izuku reunites with someone from his past.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Kirishima, Mina, Kaminari and Sato had a look of doom weighing down their faces. Sero chewed on his lip nervously, and they all watched Aizawa like he was the ferryman about to carry them to hell. Whoever failed the exam would be left in school, suffering through remedial classes while the rest joined together for a fun school trip to a forest lodge.
"Kaminari," Aizawa began, reading of his list of doomed names. "Kirishima," he enunciated slowly, "Mina," a rumbling bell tolled low afore each word, "Sato," the final chime, and all fell silent, save from the Judge himself. "Sero. You all failed the practical exam. And thus…"
He stared them down, and in that moment, he was neither man nor human. He was a monster.
"We're all going on the school trip!" the man grinned in a way that said the only joy he found in life was to emotionally torment his students. Izuku sighed. This is how you create trust issues.
The condemned five jumped from their seats, cheering and crying in equal measure. Their good spirits were quickly squashed however, when Aizawa revealed that the lodge wasn't just some nice vacation, but a boot camp to rigiously train and hone their abilities.
"And of course, everyone who failed will still be attending extra classes," the teacher spoke monotonously. "Honestly… it probably would have been easier if you just stayed at school. Now take these pamphlets and pass them on."
There was an oppressive atmosphere in the air as five students stared longingly at the rest of their friends—so carefree, so innocent. Mina buried her face in her palms and Kaminari prayed silently to whichever deity would listen. Sato had produced a pack of cookies from somewhere, chewing them down like a starving man, while Kirishima risked his life by sharing his woes with Kacchan.
The blonde looked like he was about ready to commit murder when Hagakure suddenly jumped from her seat. "We should all go shopping together!" she squealed, full of energy and impossibly animated for someone who was invisible. "We're going to need lots of supplies for the school trip, and there's a local mall not too far we could all go to!"
And just like that, whatever dark miasma had spread through the classroom dissipated like clouds parting to make way for the sun. Mina had stars in her eyes, Kaminari looked up from his seat like his prayers had been answered, and Iida was nodding approvingly.
"A marvelous idea!" he conquered. "It is always good to be prepared for any situation."
Uraraka nudged Izuku lightly with an elbow. "Will you come with us, Deku-kun?" she inquired, a sunlit smile on her face and looking at him with the brightness of a thousand stars. And honestly, Izuku would rather die than ruin that.
"Alright," he conceded.
And when in an impossible feat her smile grew even brighter, he knew he made the right choice.
Izuku didn't know how long he had been standing there, just staring in complete disbelief of what was before him. At first he thought he must be mistaken, because there was no way that what he was seeing was actually true. So, he stepped closer, to reassure himself that it was just some terribly dark hallucination.
Staring into the eyes of his own reflection, emerald green painted in circles on the glass window, he looked at what was beyond. His eyes raked slowly over every little crevasse and detail, recreating a perfect imprint in his brain to make sure it was real.
He blinked his eyes, and still, there it was. Plain as day and looking as innocent as could be.
Except it wasn't.
It must be a joke, surely, he thought. Because no one could be so stupid—
So insensitive—
So vile as to think that this was a good idea. That this was completely okay, and in no way fucked up whatsoever.
But it was.
He felt nauseous, a sickness that rotted him deep to the core. Izuku had seen a lot of things in his life, things he wished he could erase and scrub from his memory. Things no one should ever have to bear witness too. But this—this was different, in a way he couldn't properly describe. It wasn't the same gut reaction of terror as his own viscera spilled from his abdomen, or the despair of watching someone you thought would be with you for years to come crumble into dust.
It couldn't be compared, but yet, this hurt in such a strange new way. He felt betrayed, but by what, he did not know. And try as he might, as much as he wanted to convince himself that this was some sort of sick joke, the chortling teens beside him reminded him that this was reality. That there were people out there who looked at Stain and did not immediately see a murderer, but someone to admire. It didn't matter if he killed people or not, because he did it 'for a good cause'. That he was 'cool'.
Don't misunderstand. It wasn't like Izuku was unable to wrap his head around why people may feel drawn to him. Stain had a hidden charisma that spoke to people sharing his same ideals. And there was nothing wrong with that. Heroes weren't perfect, on that, Izuku could agree. The system was corrupt, and there needed to be change.
Hero did not mean good. But just because your goal is admirable does not mean that your path to reach it is justified. Izuku did not agree, and Izuku did not like him, but he understood Stain.
But what he didn't understand, what absolutely baffled him, was why that somehow meant it way okay to create merchandise based off of a serial killer.
His hands clenched to creaking fists, and unbidden, he could feel the power of One for All taking over him. He reached a hand out, and with shaky fingers, he touched the glass of the display window so softly, you might think it was an ancient artifact. His breathing came in shorter and shorter bursts, as the pads of his fingers pressed into the glass with ever growing pressure to match.
If he could just reach in… just break.
You could just do it. Show them. Do it. Who's gonna to stop you?
But no, that's wrong! It's not right.
This isn't right. This… fucking insult. Just imagine if Iida were here. Imagine how he would feel. Don't you want to help your friend? Don't you?
This isn't helping.
You should find who did this. Find them. Find them and— and—
"No!"
He screamed. He didn't care if people gave him odd looks and parents pulled their children closer.
This isn't right.
This isn't right.
This isn't right.
What's wrong with me?
One for All seeped out of him like a popped balloon. Shame of a magnitude he'd never felt before filled him, and in the middle of that mall, standing before a killer's merchandise, he cried.
What's wrong with me?
I just want to go back to normal.
Why can't I just stop being like this?
You really are pathetic.
"Hey," an arm swung around his shoulders and pulled him in, and Izuku's muscles pulled tight at the sudden touch. "Why are you crying? Something wrong?"
At first, he thought it must be one of his friends, and fear froze his stomach to ice. Please don't look, he thought. Don't look at me like this. I beg you. But when he glanced up to see the person holding him, he was taken aback by what he saw. Because it wasn't the reassuring smile of one of his friends, but a man he did not know. His face was covered in a wavy curtain of hair, constricted by the black hoodie that was pulled over his head, hiding his appearance.
"Um," Izuku muttered, skin itching with discomfort at the stranger's touch. Why did he have to be so close? He understood someone being concerned by a teen crying alone in a mall, but hadn't this person ever heard of personal space?
"Oh!" the weird man uttered suddenly, absolutely delighted. "I recognize you! You're from U.A.—I saw you in that video. Midoriya Izuku, right?"
There was no question about which video he meant, and Izuku's discomfort grew. Even now, he would have the occasional stranger walk up to him and ask for a picture.
"This is gonna be so sick!" they'd laugh, angling their cell phone. "My friends are gonna be so jealous when I show them this!"
"That's so cool," Izuku could hear the smile in the hooded man's voice. "You're a real little hero huh?" he cackled, and leaned in closer until he was whispering in his ear. "I'm so glad I got to meet you again."
Chills slithered down Izuku's spine, the words freezing him in place.
"I hope you remember me. I'd be kinda hurt if you didn't."
Once more, Izuku looked up at that hair covered face. Shigaraki leaned back, slowly unveiling the hideous grin that tore his face apart from ear to ear. Rows of unkempt teeth were covered by lips so dry, they looked like they were ready to snap. The cracks and crevices littering the sickly skin bled red, and carved even deeper into his mouth as it moved to form words.
"Let's take a walk."
Notes:
Awww, Izuku is having his first date! :D Do you think he's nervous? :3
Chapter 29: Gamble and Guidance
Summary:
"What's the difference between him and me?"
Izuku give Shigaraki some direction.
Notes:
Well, the only excuse I have for this delay is that I was too busy playing Fallout: New Vegas to write on the story... oops. Not my fault the game is so damn fun.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"Let's take a walk."
The first thought that passed through Izuku's mind was, let's not, but what left his mouth instead was a simple, "Why?"
Instantly, four of Shigaraki's fingers wrapped around his throat, with the middle one hovering just a twitch away. And despite the somewhat inconvenient grip, Shigaraki was still able to muster enough strength to dig the digits into the soft skin hard enough to bruise.
"Do you remember my quirk?" he asked, and Izuku could feel the man smirk into his hair. "Once this last finger touch you, you'll be nothing but dust. So I suggest you consider your next actions very, very closely."
And oh, Izuku remembered—more than Shigaraki could know, and with memories clear as glass, he remembered.
He remembered how his skin turned dry with decay, flaking off his muscles and floating away in tiny fragments, not unlike a snake crawling out of its old husk. Except unlike a snake, there wasn't a new shiny layer of skin waiting beneath, but flesh and blood and screaming pain. And he remembered the look on Asui's face before her head faded into nothing but ash, mixing together with the blood spurting out of her neck turning it into a dull crimson sludge.
He remembered, but what he couldn't remember, was the fear. He knew of its existence, but it was like words stuck to the tip of your tongue. He knew, he knew he knew, but no matter how far he reached and scrambled, he couldn't find that lost feeling of terror that drowned him like an icy sea, pulling him deeper into its depths until all he had was darkness.
Now, he was only left with anger, which swelled inside of him and embraced his soul like an old friend. Izuku smiled, warm as the sun, and opened his arms wide. A quiet whisper left his lips, and he mouthed the words.
Welcome home.
"I wonder how many I can take with me after I'm done with you before the police shows up," Shigaraki mused with glee, the last finger floating dangerously close by his hostage's neck. "Ten? Twelve? What do you think?"
I think you should get to the point. Izuku pressed his lips into a thin line as he attempted to glare at the villain behind him. Unbeknownst to the criminal however, the threatening words actually filled Izuku with a sense of relief.
He'd be the first to die.
Izuku would be back before Shigaraki hurt anyone else.
Even so, while the boy wasn't worried about the people around them like the villain wanted him to, he kept still. Because through his anger was another feeling; a feeling much more powerful than his urge to rip himself free and take Shigaraki down once and for all. And it was the one feeling that killed more humans than any war ever could: curiosity.
Izuku found himself in a situation with an opportunity too good to pass up, and he did not want it to end so soon. Because what did Shigaraki want? It was a question too tantalizing to go unanswered. So, with a sharp nod and in an even tone, he said, "Alright. I'll come with you."
Izuku tried not to squirm as he waited for Shigaraki to speak. The bench under him felt too hard, and his legs were starting to go numb. He eyed the people passing them by to distract himself, listening to their shouts and laughs while they wandered around without a care in the world, completely unaware of the danger lurking in the middle of them. Izuku wondered how long that would last.
When the villain decided that his victim looked uncomfortable enough, he let out a quiet chuckle and in a deep voice finally spoke. "You know, there's a lot of things I hate in this egotistical world... but there's something that's been bothering me especially lately. Maybe you could solve it for me?"
Izuku sat silent, feeling four deadly fingers resting considering against his throat.
"Have you read the news lately? I have. It's funny, you know… even after I let all those noumus run wild, it didn't even make the front page. Everyone's too busy talking about Stain, it's like they forgot. He seems to be the only thing people care about nowadays," Shigaraki's voice was turning increasingly aggressive, and Izuku's found it increasingly hard to breath as the scarred man subconsciously tightened his grip around the student's throat. "Stain Stain Stain… what's so special about him anyways? Why do everyone like him so much? What's the difference between him and me?"
Even if he wanted to, Izuku was unable to get a word past his lips. He gasped around the hand slowly robbing him of consciousness as white spots begun to dance in the corners of his vision. His body begged for him to act, but his curiosity sat like a devil on his shoulder, whispering soothing assurances in his ears. Not yet, not yet, it said, urging him to endure. We still don't know what he wants. We have to wait—we have to know. He's not going to kill us yet.
Just after that though, perhaps noticing his distress, Shigaraki eased his grip enough to allow Izuku a gulp of much needed fresh air.
"We're doing the same shit, aren't we?" he muttered, bitter. "We're just destroying what we don't like."
Izuku glanced up at the villain, observing molten red eyes that burned with the glint of insanity. Mulling over his words carefully, he attempted to find the best combination so that he could communicate with the volatile man without setting him off.
"I thought Stain was one of you," he started, and Shigaraki's eye twitched in annoyance. Green eyes cast a quick look to the roaring crowd, then back to the man. With a twist of his lips, he pressed on, "Guess not. I don't like him either. He killed… tried to kill my friend."
Shigaraki scoffed irritatedly, ignoring the boy's slip up. "I wasn't talking about you," he said, mouth pulling down into an open frown that displayed his gritted teeth. "Besides, you made bigger news than I did. So annoying."
The sound of nails dragging across skin made Izuku's hair stand on end as Shigaraki scratched his neck in frustration. Cracked nails gouged into old scars, working to add to the canvas of puckered lines already there, some still a raw pink in their freshness.
Breaths through his nose,
a whistling sound as they passed,
the chatter of the crowd forced
to drown the noises out
Insects crawled under the skin,
moving through his body and to his throat—
fingers flexed unwittingly,
the magnetic force pulling them in.
Scratch scratch scratch—
Itching—stinging—hurting,
he wanted to
Scratch scratch scratch.
"I don't like him," Izuku repeated, forcing words through his throat, tingling like acid. "But I understand his motivations. That's the difference. When people understand you, they can find something to sympathize with. Even if you don't like them, you can still agree with their words, and that's…" the boy twisted his neck, glaring up at Shigaraki unwaveringly. "That's why it's Stain's face on all the posters—why you can buy your own replica of his mask or decorate your shelf with his action figure, instead of you. People don't like you, and they don't understand you either."
Crimson eyes bore into him, delving places deep and dangerous, but Izuku refused to break. Silence, the people around them melted away and forgotten. Then, ever so slowly, the man started to laugh. Dark chuckles reverberated through Izuku's skull and jostled his brain, and they soon turned into cackles of delight as Shigaraki stared down at him.
"I see. I think I get it now," Shigaraki smiled, his mouth filled with too many teeth to look natural. "I really can't stand you, Midoriya Izuku, but… you're right, aren't you?"
Izuku shook in place as the man holding him trembled against his back with a chest full of laughter. And when Shigaraki's mirth turned into a sound of genuine amusement, he wasn't sure whether he should feel disturbed or not. Then—abruptly—the laughter stopped, only leaving behind a small buzz that slowly gained volume as the endless noise of the busy mall faded back into existence.
"So what I need is an ideal, huh? Just like the Hero Killer," Shigaraki mused, eyes alight with what Izuku could only describe as wonder. "My ideal…" he breathed, his expression morphing gradually until it settled on one of realization. "...I do have one."
And then he smiled, wide enough to split his face in two. But despite the unsettling nature of it, this was probably the most relaxed Shigaraki had ever looked. Someone only giving him a passing glance might not even think twice about it, just turning away to go on about their day.
Because this wasn't a face of malice, or a grin of pleasure as Shigaraki basked in the pain of others. No, this was someway, somehow, something that could actually be considered happiness.
Then, gone just as quickly as the laughter, the smile turned into bitterness as the villain let out a weary sigh. His eyes turned dark, and with a snarl, spat through his teeth, "It all comes back to All Might, doesn't it?
"Everything. It's all about All Might."
Izuku opened his mouth, maybe to object—"I want to be a hero" large emerald eyes sparkled with the dreams of youth. "I want to save people with a smile! Just like All Might!"—and closed it.
They spent a moment in thoughtful silent, the hand on his neck almost forgotten. "I guess it is," he acquiesced, finally. Then, rolling the dice for the gamble, he queried, "So? What are you trying to achieve?"
Shigaraki glanced down at him, a scrutinizing look in his eyes. "Hm… the little hero's curious, huh?" he grinned. "Maybe I'll just keep it my little secret for now. Still… this has been a very fruitful conversation, Midoriya Izuku. I'm glad I found you here."
Izuku looked away and mumbled under his breath, "You're welcome." The fingers around his neck twitched.
"There's something else that's been bothering me though," Shigaraki said suddenly. In an instant, spindly digits buried themselves into Izuku's dark curls and his neck made a snapping noise as Shigaraki wrenched his head back forcefully. He hissed in pain and closed his eyes momentarily, and when he opened them again, all he saw was glaring red. "Are you even scared?"
Izuku didn't answer. He wasn't sure he could—his mind was blank as the all consuming ruby sea surrounded him—and all he could do was to stare back. Eyes wide open, unblinking and glowing with unspoken emotion, his throat growing ever tighter as his breaths turned shallow, and then—
"Deku-kun?"
The pair froze as the name was uttered, scared and uncertain. Together, they turned their heads to see the round face of a girl, chocolate eyes observing them with confusion and fear. Her arms fidgeted in an attempt to find their right use, and Izuku realized he was out of time.
He didn't even need to think. Effortlessly, his hand snapped up and gripped Shigaraki's wrist in a crushing hold. Surprised, the villain attempted to complete the circle around the boy's neck, but with a yank, Izuku tore himself free and pushed his head as far away from the man as it could go. It ripped out several strands of his hair in the process, which still clung to Shigaraki's fingers and fluttered through the air innocently, but it was a small price to pay for freedom. With the slim arm still in his grasp, Izuku stopped taking risks. He flicked his wrist, bent backwards and—
—snap.
Shigaraki howled through his teeth, pulling the injured hand to his chest and cradling it protectively. He stumbled from his seat, and with a furious expression twisting his face, lunged forward with the one still functioning arm aimed at Izuku.
Never losing focus, the teen dodged into a crouch. Snapped a leg out, he swept it into the villain's ankles and sent him careening off to the side. His head thunked against the floor, and his black hood splayed out behind him as he rolled onto his back, groaning.
Izuku walked up beside him, purposeful steps leading his way. He raised a foot, aimed his red sneaker, and stomped. A loud crack resonated in his ears as he broke his former captor's intact wrist, and he finally let himself exhale a quick breath of relief. He bent down to place his hand on the man's shoulder, flipping him onto his stomach unceremoniously. Taking a not-too-kind hold of the broken appendages, he navigated them until they were resting threateningly over Shigaraki's neck.
"Uraraka," he spoke coolly.
"Wh—Deku?! What's going on?!"
Izuku didn't look at her, too focused on the threat under him to bother. Even if the villain was currently incapacitated, he wasn't going to take any chances. I'd rather not go through this again.
"Call the police," he said, and after some thought, added, "and get a hero over here as well if you can."
"Um…" Uraraka flickered her eyes between her friend and the stranger beneath him, currently pressed flush against the floor and trashing his legs while swearing loudly. She turned back to Izuku and nodded. "A-alright!"
Izuku listened numbly to the tap tap taps of Uraraka's phone as he continued to stare Shigaraki down, before the noise was drowned out by the growing crowd. I wonder if it's illegal to use someone else's quirk, the boy mused curiously, observing Shigaraki's twitching hands.
"He-hello? I need a police officer."
Notes:
Oh. Everything turned out better than expected. :o Is that a sign of fortune or future misery?
Chapter 30: For A Moment
Summary:
Shigaraki wants to kill him. Tsukauchi asks questions. All Might tries to help. Inko is there. Izuku allow himself a moment.
Notes:
Uh... hi? Sorry. Yeah, apparently I'm not quite dead yet. Just almost. A lot happened. Some really shitty shit. Some good stuff. Got a job, lost a job (no I didn't get fired, it was a 1 year contract, ha) made some money... sweet sweet cash. Anyways, I don't really have an excuse for this long absence other than I lost motivation to write on this. I'm honestly surprised I got as far as I did. I suck at finishing projects. Great at coming up with new ideas, but I lose motivation 10 minutes in and forget about it. Mostly. But I had this story in the back of my mind time and again and I always felt sad that I never updated. So here's an update. I actually finished this chapter a long ass time ago but never got to edit it but I somehow managed to pull together enough motivation to do it. That being said, before I publish a chapter I always read through it once before posting, to catch any mistakes. I haven't done that this time. I don't have the energy, but hopefully it is still okay. I have some more future stuff written for this story so hopefully I will get some more chapters out but I don't wanna get your hopes up too much. Sorry. But hey, a chapter! Yaaay! Now, if I do manage to continue, I will tell you that we are getting closer to Izuku revealing his powers. Just thought you'd like to know. Anyways, I'll stop rambling now and onto the story!
Chapter Text
Izuku was lost in a different world—a world made by two, a villain and the designated hero. He wasn't brought back to reality until a hero and a few police officers arrived on the scene to take the captured criminal away. Shigaraki hissed as his broken hands were cuffed behind his back, and his eyes seared as he stared at Izuku with pure hate. The boy stared back, face blank.
One of the police officers smiled at Izuku, seemingly impressed as he thanked him for catching such a high profile villain. His partner glared at the other officer, before scolding the freckled teen for his recklessness. Izuku wasn't surprised by the response, but seriously, what was he supposed to do? Stay still and hope Shigaraki would let him live?
Probably.
He was questioned several times if he needed any medical assistance, but Izuku declined them each time. "I'm fine… but my throat will probably have a few bruises tomorrow." He nodded towards Shigaraki, who had finally ceased struggling as he was escorted away. The man stood hunched over, head bowed, long pale hair concealing whatever expression his face currently held. "He probably needs it more than I do."
The cuffed villain raised his head slightly. A sharp red glow peeked through ragged strands, holding a silent promise for the future. But Shigaraki didn't need words for his message to ring loud and clear. I'm going to kill you, his eyes stung Izuku's soul like a sharp cut of the knife. I don't care what I have to do. I'm going to k i l l you.
Curious crowds of people were shooed to the side as three people were escorted out of the mall. Uraraka had been asked to come along as a witness, and she had made it her mission to stand like a shield between Shigaraki and her friend. She watched the black hooded figure like a hawk, her usual soft eyes dark and calculating and with a dangerous frown on her face. Like the villain could get free at any moment.
Shigaraki looked back, observing the two students as they were ushered into a waiting police car. The hooded man was still surrounded by police officers and a vigilant hero, standing as if waiting for something. Izuku peered on curiously until the serious looking policewoman closest to him answered the silent question.
"They want better security before they leave," she provided, nodding toward the group. "Another hero has been called in, along with something more sturdy than this to transport the villain in," she slapped the roof of the police car for emphasis. Izuku nodded with understanding, and the woman pushed his door shut so they could leave.
Before it swung closed completely, the boy took a last glance at Shigaraki. His mouth moved, cracked lips forming just a single word. "Midoriya…"
Click.
And the door sealed.
Izuku could hear his own breath in his ears. The air around him felt oppressing, cold and careless, turning his skin into goosebumps. He shivered, staring through the black window at darkened gray and a dot muted red, which stood out against everything else. A color screaming for attention, an universal sign of caution.
He looked at his hands. They were shaking. He curled his fingers into clenched fists, pushing them down into his lap. Be still, he told his body, but the name echoed in his head.
Midoriya.
The way Shigaraki looked at him, the crimson of his eyes flickering wildly, but never losing their focus on him.
Midoriya.
"Are you really alright?" Uraraka asked, and Izuku took a heavy breath at the sound of her voice. He turned his head. The girl fidgeted uncomfortably in the seat next to him, displaying her nervosity. "I-it's just… It's not like I don't trust you, but I know you don't like to rely on others, s-so…" she trailed off, eyes drifting to the side.
Izuku's face softened, but a light tremble still stayed in his limbs uninvited. "Uraraka, I'm okay. Really" he said and gave her a small smile. The air of apprehension around her faded as she answered him with a short nod, and returned his expression.
Eventually, they arrived at the police station, and the car pulled up into the parking lot just outside. They unbuckled their belts, and it wasn't long before Izuku found himself face to face with the lead investigator of the League of Villains, Tsukauchi Naomasa.
"Now, please start from the beginning and tell me in detail what happened," he began the interrogation, holding a notebook in one hand and a pen in the other. A sound recorder sat on the table, the blinking red light on it indicating that it was working. It kind of reminded Izuku of his therapy sessions with Dr. Kyuusai, except unlike those, what he said here wouldn't stay between just the two of them.
"Some of my classmates and I went to the mall together to buy supplies for our upcoming school field trip. When I was alone, Shigaraki came up behind me and took me hostage and asked me some questions."
"Do you know why he was there?" Tsukauchi cut in, pupils sharp and serious as he leaned closer.
He looks right in his element, Izuku thought.
"No," he shook his head before expanding. "I don't know if he planned the whole thing or if it was just some crazy coincidence."
"Hmm…" the policeman hummed, a mix of concern and thoughtful on his face. "It could mean a huge breach to U.A's security if this attack was planned. Either way, we shouldn't take any chances. What did you two talk about?"
"Well…" the freckled student thought back to their conversation. The moment Shigaraki spoke his name was still clear, playing perfectly like a movie in the back of his skull. "Midoriya…"
He wondered if there was a sequel.
"He asked me about Stain," Izuku answered and Tsukauchi nodded in encouragement for him to continue. "He wanted to know what made them different. The way he spoke about him makes me think Stain was never a member of the League."
The detective sat back a bit, but he didn't look too surprised. "It makes sense. I've seen people online discussing the theory that Stain worked independently from the League and it lines up with what we know about the man. Stain was the lone wolf type, and his ideals don't seem to line up with whatever Shigaraki's are."
"Shigaraki hates him," the young hero returned. "I think he's jealous that Stain got more attention than he did."
"So Shigaraki wanted to understand why."
"Exactly," Izuku confirmed with a nod. "I told him that the difference was that, unlike him, people know what Stain's ideals are. Whether you hate him or not he has an understandable goal that a lot of people agree with: eradicate the so called 'false heroes' and reclaim the title for those deemed worthy."
Tsukauchi was still transcribing his words to paper as he asked, "And how did he respond?"
The boy stared up into the ceiling. "He laughed."
The detective let his pen hover over the paper as he paused. "He… laughed?"
"I think he came to some sort of realization," Izuku explained. "A goal, some sort of motivation… his ideology. I'm not sure what exactly. He didn't answer me when I asked so you'll have to try questioning him yourself."
Tsukauchi scribbled down a note. "Did he mention anything else?"
The student shook his head. "No…" he trailed off, thinking back to his encounter with the criminal. He squinted as a memory nipped at him and, with some hesitation, he said, "Actually… there was one other thing. All Might. He said everything always comes back to All Might."
His interrogator slowly placed his chin in his palm, humming aloud and seemingly in deep thought. "The reason Shigaraki came to the USJ was to kill All Might… their noumu was created for that sole purpose. It's clear he has some sort of grudge against the Number One Hero. Whether that is simply because of his position as the Symbol of Peace or something more personal… it's hard to say."
"Guess you'll just have to ask him then," Izuku shrugged. "Villains like to talk."
The detective smiled. "True enough," he agreed, straightening his back into proper sitting position. He glanced at something in his notebook. "And when did Uraraka arrive?"
"Just after I asked Shigaraki about his goal," the teen informed. "That's when I apprehended him."
"Ah, yes… about that," the policeman shifted his eyes to the side uncomfortably, before turning them back to Izuku's and attempting a reassuring smile that looked more guilty than anything. Izuku rolled his eyes and cut in before the man could start.
"I didn't use my quirk," he said, fighting to keep his voice professional. He had to bite his cheek and take a calming breath to manage, allowing the pain to keep him in check. Tsukauchi doesn't make the rules, he reminded himself, exhaling slowly. He just enforces them. With a deadpan expression he continued. "I don't need One for All to break someone's bones."
Tsukauchi gave him a long look before he pinched the bridge of his nose with a deep suffering sigh. "No, I suppose you don't," he shook his head. "Anyways, I'm happy to be saved the headache of writing out a report of illegal quirk use. Not to mention, I would rather not have to punish the one who caught one of Japan's most wanted criminals."
Izuku grimaced in response. "I still think that's a stupid law."
The detective wore a perfect poker face before his eyes shifted to the ceiling, frowning. "The law isn't always perfect," he said. "But it's still the law we have to follow."
Izuku wasn't impressed. He scoffed. "Someone should change it then."
When Tsukauchi finally finished his interrogation, three hesitant knocks sounded at the door. The officer opened it to reveal a nervous looking All Might in his true form standing in the doorway. The dark haired man gave his friend a reassuring smile.
"He's clear to go," Tsukauchi affirmed. The hero smiled and glanced over the broader man's shoulder to see his green haired student quietly observing them.
"So he's not in any trouble, is he?" he implored. Tsukauchi motioned his head in confirmation and All Might breathed a sigh of relief. Then, with a nod towards the still seated teen, he inquired, "Could I borrow your room for a moment? I'd like to talk to him in private."
The policeman gave a sweep of his hand to motion his friend inside. "No problem. Take all the time you need."
All Might smiled gratefully at his friend before stepping inside the room and wrangled his large body awkwardly into the chair Tsukauchi just vacated. The detective left the two alone, closing the door behind him with a soft click. The blonde hero stared at the shut exit for a moment. He scratched the back of his neck and shifted his attention to his student. Calculating green bore into nervous blue, eyebrows quirked upwards curiously as Izuku waited for the hero to speak.
"My boy…" he began. The voice wavered slightly and All Might cleared his throat before continuing. He looked like he'd rather be anywhere but here right now, but he continued on valiantly despite the suffocating tension. "I want to start by saying what you did today was very brave. That being said…" Izuku's eyes narrowed. "I—I mean, don't misunderstand! I am very proud of you, I am! But I'm also… worried. Everything may have turned out fine this time, but if you have made even a small mistake—"
"I wouldn't."
All Might exhaled, looking at him in bewildered exasperation. "You don't know—"
"I do know," Izuku's face was stone. "There's no point in worrying about me. This was the only outcome. I'm not going to apologize for it, so drop the lecture."
His teacher looked taken aback by his brazen attitude. Izuku couldn't help feeling guilty at the hurt in his mentor's eyes, even if the hero buried it quickly with a harsh frown and pale knuckled fists.
"Have you been meeting with Dr. Kyuusai?"
Izuku's eyes widened for a moment. Then he snapped, "How do you know her?!"
All Might knew that Izuku was seeing a therapist, but he was positive he had never told the hero the name of said therapist. Did his mother tell him?
The man looked sheepish, avoiding the sharp glare digging into his skin. He coughed into a fist, stalling for time as he tried to think of the right words. "W-well, as your teacher I've been concerned about your recent behavior and shift in personality," he was sweating bullets by now. "I-it's not like I know anything about what you two talk about during your sessions—that would be very illegal, not to mention a huge breach of privacy—"
For every stutter, Izuku felt himself growing less and less impressed by the rambling words that left his mentor's mouth. The whole point of telling All Might about his sessions was so he would stop worrying, yet here they are. Stalking his therapist? Really?
"All Might…"
The name was spoken softly, yet it was enough to shut the blonde up as he stared at Izuku with silent panic. "Um…" it was almost funny, watching the number one hero acting like a child who just got caught stealing the last cookie out of the cookie jar.
Izuku was not amused.
"Look…" All Might sighed, taking in the angry green of his student's glare in defeat. "I know it was wrong of me, but I… I wanted to make sure she would be good for you. There's a lot of people out there who don't take work seriously, even when that work is to help other people. If she was one of those people, she could do you more harm than good."
"So you decided to run a background check on her."
All Might breathed out through his nose slowly, looking at the floor. He nodded. "Yes, I did." He looked guilty, but not as guilty as Izuku thought he should. "I understand that you're angry. Even if I had only your best interest in mind, I shouldn't have gone behind your back like that. Especially as your teacher. It was very unprofessional of me."
Izuku rubbed the back of his skull. He could hear a muted thud thud thud that gained volume in his ears, signaling the incoming headache. Great…
He didn't know if he was mad. He knew he should be, but it was kind of hard when All Might looked at him with such genuine concern it hurt. Still, that his teacher never even bothered to ask him first left a sour taste in his mouth. He hated the feeling of his privacy being breached, and he doubted Dr. Kyuusai would appreciate it either. He wondered if he should tell her, next time. She deserved to know, didn't she?
He would ask the hero how he found out her name in the first place, but as he considered it the answer became increasingly obvious. He was the number one hero. He must have more powerful connections than he knew what to do with.
Like Tsukauchi.
Pull enough strings and All Might could probably tell Izuku what he had for breakfast. Or get his patient records.
No, he wouldn't do that to you. That's just too cruel. You know he just wants to help you.
But what if he thought he was helping?
"Midoriya…?"
Izuku snapped out of the thoughts tumbling around his head, which were doing nothing to ease his growing headache. He refocused his attention back to All Might, who looked at him, eyebrows creased in worry. Izuku frowned. I really wish he'd stop looking so concerned all the time.
"Again, I am very sorry. I hope you can forgive me."
Izuku shook his head back and forth for a moment, trying to clear it. His aching brain protested at the movement causing him to wince in pain. He cursed his stupidity, before delicately unfurling the fists he didn't even know he had formed.
"It's fine," he said. "I'm not angry."
And it was true, he realized. He wasn't angry. He was scared.
His teacher looked relieved. His concern hadn't evaporated completely, but he seemed content for now.
"Ah… I'm glad," he nodded, smiling thinly. Then, "Oh! And if you'd like to know, I didn't find anything incriminating about your doctor. She has almost exclusively positive references!" Izuku gave him a look and All Might at least had the decency to look ashamed. "Err… that being said, I definitely won't do something like this again. Well… not without asking, at least."
Izuku tried to decide between glaring at the hero or laughing. He compromised with a deep suffering sigh.
"Izukuuu—!" Midoriya Inko ran up to her son and dragged him into a bone crushing hug. The woman could be surprisingly strong when she wanted to, Izuku noted in pain. Big fat tears soaked his shoulder as the woman cried into it. "My poor heart can't take it!" she wailed, bringing him impossibly closer. Really strong… Ouch. "When the policeman called and told me it was about you, I thought for sure it was going to stop! I'm so glad you're fine!"
Her worried sobs was enough to break down the walls around Izuku's heart that he had so carefully crafted the last few resets, at least temporarily. He circled his arms around her cautiously, returning her hug and ignoring the way his ribs creaked in protest. He didn't have the heart to tell her to ease up—not when she held onto him like she would lose him forever once she let go.
Eventually, after her shaking and sobs had calmed somewhat, she began to relax and Izuku's torso cried in sweet relief. She retrieved her head from his shoulder to stare up at him, emerald greens still shining with unshed tears and red around the edges. "Don't ever worry me like that again!" she hiccuped, lips trembling. "If something were to happen to you… if you, if you—" she cut herself off with a sob, pushing her face back into his shirt and tugging at the fabric desperately. "I don't know what I would do without you…"
"Shhh…" Izuku whispered, bringing a scarred hand up to card through her dark green locks. "Don't worry about that. You won't ever have to worry about me leaving you…" He blinked to clear up his blurred vision and was surprised at the salty beads that rolled down his cheeks. He wiped them off lazily. Come to think of it, I haven't been crying as much as I used to…
"How can I not?!" Inko shook her head, sniffling loudly. "I will always worry about you… that's what it means to be a parent," she tilted her head to look at him. "But…" her voice shook, but her expression slowly bloomed into a tentative smile. The corners of her mouth wobbled with strain, but it was warm, and it was genuine. Izuku felt his heart clench, but for once it wasn't in pain. "I heard what you did… you were really cool, Izuku."
He crumbled. His mother's embrace was so warm, so strong. Safe. He could allow himself to break just this once because he knew, that as soon as his cries had ended, as soon as his tears dried, she would be there. She would put the pieces back together, and Izuku could be strong again.
For a moment, he allowed himself weakness.
For a moment, he didn't want to care.
Chapter 31: Kill Switch
Summary:
Izuku creates a plan B.
Notes:
Just fyi, I added cover art for this story. You can see it at the first chapter. I started working on it a while back but only finished it now... as is my work ethic. Anyways, so it's not as good as I could probably do now but I think it's pretty cool.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
His ears were ringing. It was a familiar sound and he felt his cheek burn in conditioned response. In the corner of his eye was Bakugou, palm outstretched and sneering. Izuku blinked. The image was gone, as was the stinging sensation on his jowl. He blinked again. The screeching pitch didn't leave, even after he shook his head back and forth to jolt it loose. He frowned. He knew the horrible noise were there for a reason but he couldn't remember why.
I'm in my room. There is no Kacchan here. No one set off an explosion next to my ear.
His computer screen. It glowed a soft blue, something Izuku was finding increasingly irritating as it burned his eyes. Maybe he wouldn't find it so irritation if he remembered to blink, but for whatever reason Izuku could only process one thought at a time. As soon as his focus shifted he would lose track of whatever he was doing previously.
There was something in his hand. His computer mouse.
Right.
Now he remembered.
His mouse cursor hovered hesitantly in place. One more click and his purchase would be completed. He'd gotten this far yet he found himself hesitating.
This is a crime, he reminded himself, unhelpfully. It was like the realization just hit him. Of course he knew it was a felony before, but he never took the time to consider what it meant until this very moment. He was about to cross a line he never thought he would reach. What would happen if he got caught? No one wants a hero with a criminal record.
A bullet of cold sweat rolled over his brow. Then he snorted and a sardonic smile slit his face. After all he had been through and something this trivial still caused his fingers to tingle and stomach to clench.
He wondered what people would think of him if they saw him right now. Funnily enough, that thought scared him the most, more so than getting caught did. His mom, All Might, Iida, Uraraka… he imagined the disappointed looks on their faces. All Might shook his head slowly, wishing he hadn't been so hasty in choosing his successor. Inko cried, asking where she went wrong in raising him. Iida chopped his hands through the air, giving a wild lecture of how what he did was not only wrong legally, but morally. Uraraka frowned sadly… concerned?
"Why?" she asked him. "Why would you need something like that?"
Izuku couldn't answer.
"You wouldn't believe me, even if I told you."
Her fist clenched in frustration and she glared at him, defiantly.
"You won't even give us a chance. Why, Deku? Why?"
Because, he thought. I don't want to.
Complete your purchase?
Yes >No
...it's for the best.
Complete your purchase?
>Yes No
Complete your purchase?
>Yes No
This is for me.
Purchase complete. Please visit us again!
Izuku smiled at the polite message. It was so normal, like he just completed any other regular internet purchase.
'Cyanide Capsule, 1 item, 16300 ¥'
But it wasn't.
He should have known it wouldn't be so easy. Nothing was ever easy for Midoriya Izuku, was it? Just when things began to look up the world would be there to pull the rug out under his feet and laugh in his face because holy shit, he actually fell for it!
What was he even supposed to feel at this point? Guilt, irritation, resignation, fear? A confusing blend of all four plus whatever other negative emotions he could name?
The police officer gave him an awkward smile of reassurance, poorly disgusting his pity for the poor boy. His mother held him close in a half hug, as if to shield him from whatever words the man uttered next. Worrying her lower lip she half asked, half stated, "You want something with my Izuku?"
The uniformed man nodded. Finally, he the half-hearted smile drop and substituted it with a deep sigh. It was the kind of sigh one uttered just before informing you a member of your family just passed away. "We regret to inform you this but while escorting Shigaraki Tomura to a safe location for his interrogation, an accomplice of his intercepted the police vehicles and the two managed to escape."
Izuku's tongue felt odd in his mouth, heavy and thick. "Was anyone hurt?" he asked, swallowing through bitter phrase. His mother had a stricken look on her features and her arms tightened around him. When the officer avoided his eyes, he had his answer.
"Three with moderate to severe injuries. The rest sustained minor wounds in the struggle." Inko gasped, throwing a hand up to her mouth. "One lost her life."
Izuku had tried to reset then. He hoped with all his heart that his last checkpoint was far enough back that he could rectify his mistake. He returned to the officer's pitying gaze, explaining how their villain escaped and how unfortunate it was. Izuku stared dumbly, one single thought making its way through the haze.
I failed.
How arrogant of him, believing his power was the solution to all his problems. The resets had gotten to his head and made him feel invincible. He wouldn't be like other heroes with the shame of lives lost on his conscious; it was the one piece of happiness his quirk gave to him.
"I see," he responded, voice flat. The officer seemed taken aback by his lack of emotion and his mother looked at him wetly, radiating concern. Izuku ignored them both, instead settling on the fourth presence in the room, who had remained silent until now. "What are you doing here?"
All Might frowned. The expression grew closer to him by the day, it seemed.
"You were the one who captured Shigaraki," he began explaining. "There's a possibility the villain will come to seek revenge for your actions. As such, we have decided to take proper measures to ensure your safety. The police have deployed extra officers to patrol the nearby area, and I have ensured that there will always be a hero on standby guarding your residence."
Inko decided to speak up, looking like a mama cub ready to defend her young. "You think he may come here?"
"There is a possibility," the hero confirmed, ruefully. "I want to apologize for the danger you and your son has been put in but I promise you, we will do all we can to keep you safe and away from harm."
"What about my friends?" Izuku cut in. "Won't they be possible targets as well?"
All Might gave him a sad look. "That is true. Initially, I wanted to provide them with the same protection as you but I was told it would be 'too expensive'," initial shame turned to anger. "I pulled all the strings I could to make sure they have at least one patrolling officer nearby, and some of my friends among the heroes agreed to pass by through the regions as much as they can. We all want to catch these villains as soon as possible."
Izuku clenched his hands tightly. "Thank you, All Might," he bowed. He shared in his mentor's anger, but he understood the man did what he could. He was grateful for that, he was. He was just sad neither of them could do more.
He felt his mother's arms trembling around him as she hugged him closer. "I'm sure it will be alright, 'Zuku," she tried to reassure him, but even with the small smile on her face she couldn't disguise her worry. Izuku looked at her, pupils narrowing.
"I won't ever let anyone hurt you," he stated, more as a fact than a promise. His mother's eyes grew wide at the declaration and she sucked in a sharp breath. "If they try, I—" he grit his teeth. "I—"
"Izuku."
He stopped. Inko smiled at him warmly, raising the sleeve of her cardigan to wipe at his wet cheek. When did he…?
"I know Izuku," she spoke, soft and comforting. "I know you'd never let anyone harm me… or them." She carded short fingers through his hair, petting his head gently. "I'm so proud of you, Izuku."
"Mom—"
"Just make sure that you take care of yourself as well, okay Izuku?"
Silence. Then, "Okay…"
He wanted to believe it.
He picked the package up right after school ended. To be safe he had it delivered to a post office about an hour's train ride away from his residence. He wasn't sure if it would do much to fool any law enforcement who came poking, but it was better than delivering it right to his front door step.
When he got home, he ran through the house and locked himself inside his room before tearing through the packaging with frenzied abandon. He only paused when he saw what was inside, observing the little brown capsule with strange detachment. It was smaller than a fingernail, yet carried a dose potent enough to kill a grown man.
The Safeguard, he called it. In case everything else failed, he would have his Safeguard to fall back to. Shigaraki was after him. There wasn't a 'maybe' or a 'possibly'. Just a 'definitely'.
When Shigaraki spoke his name, "Midoriya—" he had made a promise. He would never give up and never back down, not until one of them were dead. That's what the Safeguard was for. If Shigaraki got his hands on him, if he put him in a position where Izuku couldn't move… he had his plan B.
Izuku moved the pill into his mouth, slotting it into a position where he could easily use his tongue to maneuver it to a point where he would only need to bite down and let the fast acting poison do the rest. So long I can move my jaw, I always have an option, he thought.
"Shigaraki…" he whispered, and made a promise too.
Notes:
A few notes I want to add about this chapter:
1. The first part takes place after Izuku finds out that Shiggy escaped. In case anyone was confused.
2. Kurogiri was the accomplice the police mentioned. I don't think it's that important but I'll clarify here in case anyone wondered.
3. Some of you may be disappointed that Shiggy escaped. I get you but I thought about it and decided that it wouldn't make sense for AfO to let Shiggy get locked away. Now, if you're wondering if this makes the whole Deku beating the shizzle wizzle out of Shiggy and having him arrested pointless... don't worry, it's not. It will have a point and you will see what soon.I think that's about it. Remember to check out the cover art, haha! Hopefully we will see each other again soon. :)
Oh and don't mind the accidental rick roll. Believe it or not, that was unintentional.
Chapter 32: Intermission 2
Summary:
Izuku has another appointment with Dr. Kyuusai
Notes:
Oh yea, I'm still kicking. Somehow. Sorry for being slow. :( Again. But at least you didn't have to wait a year this time. I have an internship now at a place which, ironically enough, actually made me a more productive writer than when I was sitting at home doing nothing. Oh, and I spent 2 weeks binging all seasons of JoJo. This is not relevant to the story what-so-ever, but hey... maybe a JoJo fanfic in the future? Probably not but I can dream. Just like a certain golden haired someone else. *wink wink, nudge nudge* ;) ;) ;)
Ok, I'll shut up now. Ok ok, one last thing in case you wanna know what is up next (no spoilers tho), but yeah, we're moving onto the training camp arc next. Ooooh yeeeeaahh. Fun. Oh yeah, and I haven't proof read this chapter because I'm too lazy. Yeah, I don't even have a proper excuse, I'm sorry. :(
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Dr. Kyuusai observed him with something of an expectant gleam. Poorly veiled intrigue danced across her retinas and she looked almost antsy as she fiddled with the pen in her hand, occasionally tapping it against her pastel colored notebook. She didn't look… impatient, per say. But it was starting to get on his nerves. So, once Izuku finally grew exasperated attempting to figure out what had her so preoccupied, he bit out a, "What?"
He cringed as soon as the word left his mouth, holding too much venom than what was strictly necessary—or deserved. For her part, Dr. Kyuusai did not look offended by it. She just blinked, tilting her head to the side almost microscopically.
"Pardon?" she quizzed, caught off guard by the sudden inquiry. Izuku quickly shook of his guilt before elaborating.
"Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked, eyes narrowing suspiciously. "You look like you want to say something but are holding yourself back, for whatever reason."
The woman was quiet for a moment, likely mulling over her options. Eyes slid shut in momentary respite and the eventual sigh leaving her lips signaled that she had reached a conclusion. "Was it that obvious?" her eyes opened once more, and she smiled at him apologetically. "Hm… I didn't want to force the issue in case you brought it up yourself, curious as I may be. Still, since I did such a bad job of hiding it, I ought to be honest with you." She adjusted in her seat. "I saw the news report on you."
"...oh."
She gave him another apologetic expression. "I'm not going to force you to talk about it… but I just wanted to say. I was very impressed."
Izuku frowned. "Impressed…?"
"Yes. Very much so," she smiled again, but this one was more genuine, reaching all the way to the corners of her eyes. "You captured a notorious villain all on your own. I'd say that is quite the impressive feat, no?"
The boy avoided her eyes, opting to study the patterns of dust on the floor instead. He bit down into the flesh of his lips, before quietly muttering. "It's not like it mattered in the end. He managed to escape police custody shortly afterwards."
"True as that may be, it was through no fault of your own. Right?" she raised long manicured fingers to tap the underside of her chin lightly. "Do you blame yourself for his escape?"
"People died," he ground out. His anger was misplaced he knew, but it was just so… hard, nowadays, to know where he was supposed to aim all the bottled fury that lived inside of him. Whenever he managed to expel some of it, there would always be a new situation to throw fuel into the fire.
People had died and he was the one who allowed Shigaraki that chance to begin with. Of course he blamed himself.
"If I had just let him get away, those people could still be alive!"
"Or maybe even more people would have ended up hurt," she spoke, tone just as blunt as if she told him the sky was blue, or that one plus one equals two. It was hard to not take it to heart. "We can't always predict what consequences our actions will have, and blaming ourselves when things go wrong won't solve anything. If you want to blame someone, then blame the man responsible for killing those people. Don't blame yourself because you couldn't predict the future."
Izuku was silent. Then, hardly even a whisper, "I do blame him… but…"
But… I still feel responsible.
Even when I know it's stupid, it doesn't change anything.
Dr. Kyuusai shook her head. "I guess it's an obvious thing to say, but we can't change the past. We can only move forward."
Before he could stop himself, a sharp giggle escaped him. It was half desperation, half genuine amusement. He slapped a hand over his mouth as blood rushed to his cheeks, his freckles turning an even darker shade of brown in embarrassment.
"I don't think that's the best advice to give me."
His therapist looked confused for a second. Then, realization dawned in her eyes. "Right," she clipped. "Your quirk." She furrowed her brows. "What did you… when you found out that the villain escaped, what was the first thing you did?"
"Killed myself," he shrugged, just as casual as if talking about the weather. "I had hoped that I could return far enough back in time so that I could stop Shigaraki from getting away—or at least, prevent anyone from getting hurt. It didn't work."
"Why not?"
"Not enough time." He stared up the ceiling. Ironic. Izuku probably had more time than anyone else on this earth, yet it still wasn't enough. His knuckles turned ivory. "By the point I returned, I… it was already too late. There was nothing I could do. It… it really made me think…" he lowered his eyes, now staring directly into Dr. Kyuusai's own. There were so many feelings that he couldn't put into words, that he could only convey by tearing down the facade and allowing the woman to take a glimpse inside. "Am I growing too used to my quirk?"
She hummed. "What do you mean?"
Izuku let his fingers relax. Like he was holding an imaginary stress ball, he clenched them again, then released, and then repeated the process several times over. It was one of several quirks for when he had too many emotions than he knew how to deal with. He just needed to do… something.
"This is the first time I couldn't go back to fix stuff," he confessed. "I was sorta growing used to my death being used to fix all my problems. I thought—so long I made sure everyone was okay, dying wasn't so bad, you know? It wasn't good, but maybe… I could be content with it," he shook his head, green curls falling like waves. "But now, when even dying doesn't help… I don't know what I should do. And, I was even starting to feel..."
Invincible? Arrogant?
He left the thought unfinished.
Dr. Kyuusai stared at him for a moment. Maybe waiting in case he had anything more to say. When nothing came, she leaned back in her seat. Then, as she continued to look at him, her eyes softened. She left out a soft sigh, the noise small yet somehow filled with… an understanding.
"Do you ever think you put too much responsibility on yourself?"
Izuku blinked, startled at the sudden turn in conversation. "...huh?"
"You have an amazing power, Midoriya," the woman said, looking at him meaningfully. "Because of this, you think you alone carry the burden of keeping everyone around you safe, no matter your own cost in doing so."
"I—"
"Or am I wrong?"
Izuku pressed his lips together, forming a paper thin line. "...no. But—"
"You should relax sometimes, Midoriya," she nodded at him, giving him a secretive smile. "I know, that might be easy for me to say, but… you're not the only hero out there."
He looked at her in disbelief. "I'm not a hero."
"Really?" Dr. Kyuusai tapped her pen against her chin. "I think the people around you have a different opinion on the matter."
Notes:
Full disclaimer: I'm not really sure how therapists operate. Like, I have some personal experience with something... not quite a therapist, but similar? And very limited. But I hope I'm doing the profession justice.
Hm, do you think Dr. Kyuusai is part of the Deku fan club?
Chapter 33: Four's a Team
Summary:
The first day of training. Izuku meets the Wild Wild Pussycats.
Notes:
My story has now officially reached 100 pages! Yay! *toots horn*
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"The Wild Wild Pussycats," Izuku smiled. They had just stepped off the bus to where U.A's first year hero classes would participate in a several day long training regimen which, according to Aizawa, would push their quirks and physical abilities to the limit. Despite the underlying threat in his teacher's voice as he vaguely explained what they would be doing, Izuku was excited.
It wasn't as obvious now as it used to be but at heart, the freckled teen was still a hero-loving fanboy. He'd be lying if he said he wasn't looking forward to be learning directly under such a well respected hero team. Mandalay, Pixie-Bob, Ragdoll and Tiger; Izuku owned at least one figurine of each member at home, along with his much priced poster of the quartet striking a dynamic pose whilst smiling together and pointing dramatically at the camera. Recalling it now, the memory caused a light blush to creep up his cheeks. Maybe his hero obsession was a bit over the top after all.
"You'll be staying at the foot of that mountain over there, where you'll find lodging and all necessary accommodations," Mandalay announced, pointing a thick-gloved finger for further emphasis down at the massive forest situated just below the hill-cliff they currently stood on. It was enough to bring Izuku out of his reverie and he blinked to attention. As he zoned back to awareness he noticed for the first time the young, much too young to be a U.A. student, boy shuffling awkwardly at a distance away from everyone else. By the look on his face, he'd rather be anywhere than here. Uraraka leaned in by his side.
"Hey, did you see Tiger or Ragdoll when you stepped off the bus?"
Izuku shook his head. He'd been searching for them ever since they first arrived, but the only heroes of the four-man team greeting them was Mandalay and Pixie-Bob. "No. They're probably meeting up class 1-B somewhere else."
"I guess you're right," Uraraka nodded her assent. Her eyes then landed on the mystery child, now busy kicking pebbles off of the cliff's edge. "Who's that?" she wondered aloud, gesticulating her head in the general direction. Izuku shrugged noncommittally. He opened his mouth to expand the answer, but was immediately and mercilessly cut off as dirt funneled down his throat, sending him into a violent coughing fit. Before he could even process what had just happened, his body was carried high into the air while a voice loudly declared:
"Sorry kids, but the training's already begun! I want to see you by the camping grounds in three hours or you won't make it in time for lunch!" Mandalay grinned, waving at them much too cheerfully as a massive wave of dirt pushed under the feet of every single 1-A student and carried them to the cliff's edge, throwing them off with hardly any warning. The heroine ran up to the wooden fence that looked unbothered by the display of power, shouting after them. "You're free to use your quirks as you see fit, so long you don't hurt each other that is! Now, have fun kitties! Let's see if you've got what it takes to become real heroes and survive the Beast's Forest."
Beast's Forest, Izuku contemplated. A smirk tugged at the edge of his face. He twisted his body in the air, curling it into a ball and doing a few flips before landing with a roll, coming up into a crouch and easily mitigating any damage. Bring it on.
Uraraka floated down beside him, looking slightly sick but over all unharmed.
"R-release…" she grunted out between clenched teeth, before falling to her knees with a relieved sigh. Iida touched down not far behind, though he wasn't quite as graceful about it and struggled to keep his balance. He ultimately failed, planting face first into the (thankfully) soft ground with a soft "oof".
Izuku stifled a chuckle and came out of his hunched position, wandering up to his friend and offered a scarred hand.
"You alright?" he questioned. Iida let out a groan as he pushed up on shaky arms, rubbing his face free of dirt and grimacing in distaste.
"Yes, I'm quite fine… thank you," the stocky boy returned, accepting the offered hand and allowed Izuku to help him onto his feet. "Unfortunately, my reaction was not quick enough to allow myself a more… dignified descent."
"Don't beat yourself up over it, you weren't the only one," Uraraka chirped, skipping up beside them and nodding subtly towards a very dazed looking Kaminari, who had yet to come up from his supine position. Jirou poked him with a foot curiously.
Iida frowned slightly at the display, but declined to comment. He just shook his head reticently. "Well, in either case," he spoke up, blue-gray eyes narrowing in suspicion as they trained on the darkness of the forest ahead. "We have no time to waste. Let's go."
"Wait—" Izuku called sharply before the engine-quirk user could speed away. The bespectacled boy paused, glancing back at his friend with befuddlement. Uraraka quirked a brow, wearing a similar expression.
Izuku eyed the both of them. "Mandalay didn't say anything about not being allowed to work together, right?"
Immediately, his friend's eyes lit up with realization.
"That's right," Iida confirmed, ever the stickler for rules. "She only warned us against fighting each other. Which means—"
Before he could finish his sentence, an inhuman screech pierced through the air, causing all three heroes-in-training to leap in surprise. Izuku whipped around, heart slamming against his rib-cage, lungs seizing, eyes blown wide—
Don't tell me…!
The air around them shifted, turning frigid as a grand sheet of ice sprung from nothing, blanketing a massive and grotesque looking creature in a protective film of frost. For one moment, Izuku felt a twist of terror as he took in the daunting form of what could only be a noumo. And if a noumu was here then that meant that Shigaraki—
Shigaraki—
Wait.
He squinted. In his panic he almost missed it, but now that the beast was frozen in place it gave him a moment to observe it closer. And he could see now, what he previously thought was a noumo, lacked the Frankenstein creations' distinct leathery hide and exposed brain. Instead, this thing's skin—if you could even call it that—consisted of dirt and rock, framed by thick brown roots slithering over the length of its body and giving it more of a… fantastical look, rather than something out of a Mary Shelley novel.
Earth manipulation, his instinctive built-in database of quirk knowledge kicked in. This is Pixie-Bob's creation.
He relaxed instantly at the realization.
"Sorry... was that too much?"
Todoroki stepped out from behind the petrified creature, right arm raised. He looked awkward, like he was waiting for them to admonish him for using too much force and chastise him for showing off.
"Awesome," Uraraka beamed instead, flashing a thumbs up of appreciation. "Hey, this is perfect! You should join our team too. Right, Deku? Iida?" She looked at her teammates inquisitively, but it was more a formality than anything. She already knew there was no way they could turn down help from the fire-ice user. The biggest question was Todoroki himself.
"Team?" the quiet boy raised one multi-colored brow. He glanced between the three friends, considering. He took a step closer.
"Yes, team! We were just about to think of a plan so we could get through the forest together as fast as possible. Judging by the thing you froze over there, I doubt it will be the last opponent we'll have to face on our way. A flashy, strong quirk like your's would be really handy!" Uraraka explained eagerly, like a very dedicated car salesman. Todoroki hummed along to her words, his usual poker-face betraying nothing.
"...I suppose," he allowed eventually, giving a staccato nod. There was a cracking noise and the half ice, half fire teen glanced to the side. "Hm… we ought to hurry then. It would seem this thing is more durable than I originally thought. How troublesome."
"That's alright," Izuku walked forward. He reeled his fist back. A quick jab forward, and the quirk-created creature exploded in a glittering mist of dust and sand. He brought a palm up to shield his eyes, turning away and blinking a few times to clear his vision. "Okay. Let's plan."
It took about an hour and a half before they reached their destination. The plan had been simple enough. In fact, Izuku was sure it could've been completed even without all four of them. That being said, it was more fun to work together, wasn't it? They didn't bother with unnecessary flashiness; more often than not, the simplest solution was the most effective. Occam's razor.
To start with, they all gathered around Iida, grabbing a hold of him as securely as possible. Uraraka then proceeded to cancel all of their gravity, excluding Izuku and the quirk user herself. He needed his weight for a little while longer. Without it, his quirk's power would be severely limited as he used it to kick off the ground, launching them up and forward at dangerous speed.
He used as much power he could possibly muster whilst still leaving all bones intact in his stomp, and as soon as his feet left the ground Uraraka slapped her open hand on his back, turning him weightless. The heroine-in-training was the only one still affected by the attractional pull of earth's mass, partly so she wouldn't throw up during their transformation to human jet planes and partly so that she could act as a stabilizing weight for when Iida turned his engines on, giving them an extra boost. They'd learned since the incident in the cafeteria from their first days at U.A..
Uraraka clung to Iida's legs with a steel grip, looked slightly nauseous. Izuku couldn't blame her. Her position was probably the most precarious one after all.
It was mostly smooth sailing after that. When they neared the ground, Todoroki used his ice to create a ramp so their momentum could send them back flying into the sky, high enough that they breached the tree tops. It wouldn't do to smack into any stray trunks. There was the occasional break, either to give themselves a break from using their quirks or to blast away the increasingly rare mud monster that wandered onto their path. Izuku was pretty sure they were far ahead of everyone else, which would explain why the concentration of earth creatures were so sparse. He wasn't sure what Pixie-Bob's exact limitations were, but it should be a safe guess to say she left most of her creations to deal with the larger groups.
He did feel a little bad for leaving the rest of his class to fend for themselves. But, he reasoned, they were all capable heroes in their own right, and it's not like they were in any real danger. Not to mention, too many people could be more of a hindrance than help.
Mandalay smiled when she observed their slightly scuffed forms approach.
"Congrats! Looks like you're the first ones here," she cocked her head to the side, bringing a stuffed paw-covered hand to her chin. "By this rate, I think you'll be the only ones getting any lunch today kitties."
Uraraka looked concerned. "The others… you're not really gonna starve them are you?"
The pro-heroine breezed out a laugh. "Oh, don't worry your little heads. I'm sure they'll be here in time for dinner! Speaking of…" there was a cat-like glint in her eye. "Pixie-Bob is still out there keeping your classmates busy. To be honest… we never actually expected anyone to get here this early. This isn't your first time doing something like this, is it?"
"We've had our fair share of… close calls," Todoroki nodded solemnly, though his expression remained as stoic as ever.
Yeah… close calls.
Izuku made a face.
"It was all because we worked together. A good strategy is stronger than any quirk," Iida spoke, chopping his arm through the air fast enough to give Izuku whiplash.
"That's right!" Uraraka jumped in, pumping her fist, expression bright and with her all teeth on display. "We could have never made it this far on our own. This must be the power of teamwork!"
"Sure is kitty!" Mandalay laughed, enjoying the enthusiasm. "Of course, teamwork isn't for everyone… That being said, I had hoped more of your classmates would have considered that option. Oh well… they'll get there someday."
She shrugged. She didn't seem too bothered by the notion. They were here to learn after all.
Before any more words could be exchanged, a small presence demanded attention as he stalked up to Izuku with determined steps. It was the same young boy from before. Izuku had to wonder how he got here as fast as the pro-heroine. Did she carry him?
Izuku painted the mental image in his mind. Mandalay with the somewhat grumpy looking child on her back, getting a piggyback ride as she jumped from tree to tree like one of those action animes Izuku used to watch on TV as a child. Or perhaps they would ride on the back of one of Pixie-Bob's creations, the creature swimming through the ground like a fish swam through water. It was kind of cute, though he did not dare speak it out loud. The kid did look exceedingly grouchy.
The boy stood there for a moment. He was mute as he considered Izuku with a strange look, eerily observant for someone so young. His large eyes turned into thin strips as he narrowed them in deep concentration, light frustration tinting the edges. Small beads of sweat broke out across Izuku's neck as the boy studied him, looking like he was trying to solve a particularly difficult math problem.
"Hm," he settled on, seemingly content at whatever he found. He took a step closer to the nonplussed teen and with an authoritative tone announced, "I'm Kota. Who're you?"
"Midoriya," Izuku angled his head at an incline, raising both eyebrows. "You can call me Deku… I guess?"
The child gave an affirmative nod, leaving Izuku even more confused as he tried to figure out what just happened.
"Um," a nervous voice piped in. "I'm Uraraka. You can call me Ochako!"
She went for a reassuring smile, bending her knees slightly and reaching a hand forward for a shake. Kota gave the offered palm a searing look as if it had personally offended him and blatantly ignored it in favor of crossing his arms and turning on his heels with a petulant pout.
Uraraka gaped, aghast at the rude dismissal. Iida looked like he was going to faint. Todoroki was as blank as ever and Mandalay just sighed, but did not look surprised.
"Sorry, that's my nephew. He's not a big fan of heroes," she informed, attempting to lighten the mood with a laugh, but it came out hollow. A curious look was briefly aimed at Izuku, but whatever the pro was thinking, she did not voice it. "Please don't be too hard on him."
Not a fan of heroes? That was odd, Izuku thought. He couldn't remember ever meeting a child that wasn't completely enamored by society's champions of justice. If the child was older and had learned the world is a more nuanced place than originally depicted, it would make more sense. But Kota couldn't be any older than seven. What had happened to make someone so young so disillusioned with the ideas of heroes?
Well… I guess there's a type for everything?
He dismissed the thought. This could very well be Kota's way to rebel against the authority figures in his life, which in this case would be his pro-hero aunt. Putting it like that, it made sense.
"Well, in any case," Mandalay broke the slightly tense atmosphere that formed in Kota's wake. Sharp eyes studied the forest's thick flora behind them in thought. "Pixie-Bob should be getting here soon. You hungry?"
Notes:
Izuku may have died countless of times but at least the family jewels were spared this time. See, it's not all bad.
Not the most exciting chapter but I need to build up for what's to come. I could have written in more detail of how Izuku and Team got through the woods but I didn't think it'd be that interesting. I just wanted them to work together. And then I threw Todoroki in there because I've really been neglecting him and that makes me sad.
Fyi, while I keep up with the manga I haven't caught up with the latest anime seasons. I don't know if they expand on everyone's trip through the Beast's Forest in the anime since the manga pretty much skips over it. The point I wanna get across is that I base my fanfic off of the manga so if the anime does something different I wouldn't know about it.
Speaking of, I did sorta ignore canon a bit while writing this chapter. When reading through the manga again to remind me of how exactly this whole arc goes down Mandalay said that the 3 hours was for them to get to the lodge, but uh... just ignore that and pretend it didn't happen. I had already written out part of the chapter when I brushed up on my manga knowledge and was too lazy to re-write. My excuse is that it's no fun to just reiterate what happened in canon word by word so I will be taking some liberties.
Chapter 34: The Calm
Summary:
Izuku and Kota has a conversation.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
It was almost 5:30 PM when the rest of class 1-A arrived, pouring into the mess hall looking like zombies on their feet and ready to collapse any minute. Some gave up the fight against dignity and let themselves fall, Ashido making a particularly dramatic show as she kissed the hardwood floor.
"I can't feel my legs!" she cried, refusing to move even as Kirishima did his best to cheer her on.
"Come on, just a little bit further!" he pumped his fist. "You can't just end it here!"
The bubblegum pink girl groaned, muffled as her forehead rested against the cool ground. "I'd rather die than move another inch."
Izuku, Uraraka, Iida and Todoroki had spent the majority of their time waiting for the rest of the class by helping the Pussycats prepare dinner. They went from washing and chopping vegetables to boiling rice and seasoning the meat, the young Kota working in his own little corner and bouncing off any attempt to start conversation like a brick wall. Mandalay and Pixie-Bob answered many of Izuku's hero related questions; the blonde heroine especially enjoyed recounting her tales of dramatic defeats of dastardly villains.
"—of course, he didn't realize I could use the dirt in the potted plants by the window," she finished with a grin, retelling the story of a would-be robber during a casual shopping tour turned precarious.
There was a tap tap tap as quick steps stalked up close, a gruff voice snarling in displeasure. "Deku. You little shit."
"Nice to see you too," Izuku greeted his old friend, Uraraka and Iida eyeballing the scene testily from the sidelines, unsubtly creeping closer. For his part, Bakugou kept his distance and settled for verbal abuse over physical.
"How the fuck did you get here before me?!"
"If it makes you feel any better, I didn't do it alone," he gestured to his teammates, signing extra wide to include Todoroki who was observing the exchange with a passive mask from his own spot, separated from the rest. "I had some help."
"Figures," Bakugou puffed, shoving his hands into his pockets with a grunt. "I swear, if you're about to give me a lecture about the magic of friendship I'll seriously puke."
"Noted," Izuku bobbed his head in assent. Somehow, I feel it would go over your head anyways.
A loud voice cried out a short distance away. "FOOD!"
Ah—looks like Kirishima finally got Ashido back on her feet.
The heroine-in-training sped across the floor so fast Izuku suspected she might have used her quirk, plopping down by one of the long tables with tears of joy streaming down her face. Stars glistened in her eyes as she took in the wide selection of delectable cuisine, looking as if she had discovered the road to El Dorado.
"We should probably sit down before Ashido eats all the food," Uraraka quipped, lightly patting her freckled friend on the back as she passed him to find herself an open seat.
"Good idea," Iida concurred. His delivery was so deadpan Izuku questioned whether he realized Uraraka was only joking, before ultimately deciding it didn't matter, and he joined his friends in the buffet they helped prepare.
After dinner was over, everyone looking more than satisfied with their fill, it was time for a well deserved and well delayed bath. Izuku closed his eyes, exhaling a lengthy sigh of satisfaction as he finally felt his muscles begin to relax. An odd squishing sound to his left interrupted his peace and without missing a beat he called out:
"Mineta."
He opened his eyes a crack and gave the shortest student in their class a Look. The boy stood frozen by the wall that separated the men's and women's bath, one sticky and purple ball-shaped object in one hand and another already affixed to the wooden divide. Droplets of sweat trickled down his back, and Izuku suspected it had nothing to do with the hot steam surrounding them.
"Sit down."
He sat down.
Izuku closed his eyes and sank back down, nose almost touching water. He breathed slowly. Ardent and quiet chatter alike filled the background. Bit by bit it started to fade as Izuku filtered out the world around him, not even leaving his own thoughts behind. Things were calm… nice.
Peaceful.
He sank deeper into the water.
It never lasts long…
"Awwwright tiger, show me what you've got! Don't hold back!"
Izuku raised a fist. "...you sure?"
"Sure am!" the oldest and only male member of the Wild Wild Pussycats blared sonorously, limbs spread into a steady stance ready to tackle any attack sent his way.
"...alright then," Izuku nodded, settling his face into an even expression. He peered at his fist, considering. How many percent could he handle now?
"Five percent…" he mouthed, clenching his fingers tighter. He felt power surge within him, but it wasn't enough to strain him yet. "...ten percent." The fist began to shake. I can still take more—
"Twelve percent," he declared. He reared his hand back and punched, air pressure and brute force alike surging forward sharply. Tiger's expression twitched once and he jumped out of the way just moments before the attack could hit him dead on.
"Woah—" he exclaimed in a breathless huff of air, stumbling on his landing. The leftover air pressure was almost enough to finish the job, but he held out until the last minute. Then, he swung a punch of his own and Izuku channeled a small amount of One for All into his legs before pushing back, narrowly avoiding the blow. He could feel the very tips of Tiger's knuckles graze his nose, but was otherwise unharmed.
"...impressive!" Tiger grinned, all fire and zeal. "But not enough! Next time, I want you to dodge it completely."
"Y-yes sir!" Izuku gave a salute of respect, somewhat out of breath. "I'm ready to give this training my all, so please don't hold back on bit on me! No matter what!"
Tiger laughed. "Big words, but I can tell you mean them! That's great! Just one thing…" he poked a paw into Izuku's chest, the force causing the boy to stumbled back. "I can see fire in your eyes, the kind that tells me you'd push yourself to your very limits to reach new heights and become even stronger! It's good to have passion, but don't forget that when it comes to training, there are no shortcuts. Don't push yourself harder than necessary just because you're impatient! If you do, the only thing that's gonna happen is you tearing yourself apart. That's all. Got it?"
"Um…" Izuku was a bit taken aback by the sudden turn in conversation. Now that he thinks about it, didn't All Might tell him something similar at one point?
"I'm happy to see you working hard, but overdoing it is no good either my boy!"
He wasn't sure. It was hard to tell memories from dreams nowadays. But…
...but I can't afford to be patient. I get what Tiger is saying, but he doesn't understand what's at stake. I have to work harder than anyone else, or—
"You should relax sometimes, Midoriya. You're not the only hero out there."
Izuku frowned as Dr. Kyuusai's words unwittingly forced themselves to the front of his mind. Damn. Don't tell me the therapist actually works.
"...right," he answered after a moment of silence. He nodded up at Tiger. "Got it."
Tiger's eyes bore into him. The intense stare prickled the back of Izuku's neck. Then, the hero's face split into its usual sharp grin. He bobbed his head, satisfied.
"Awwwrrright!" he twirled around, facing a group of waiting students. "So, who's up next?"
"So… Midoriya!" Kaminari grinned as he situated himself on the bench opposite to him, slamming down his tray of food energetically, spilling some of the contents in the process. He didn't seem to notice.
Izuku looked at him questioningly as he sat down, shifting in place a few times to make himself comfortable. It wasn't that he and the lightning quirk user were on unfriendly terms, but it was still fairly rare for them to interact. Mainly because Kaminari would often hang around Kirishima, who in turn hung out with Bakugou… for whatever reason. The blonde would curse more than make actual human conversation, but Kirishima just laughed through it all without batting an eye.
It was pretty impressive actually. Especially since Bakugou had yet to kill the self-proclaimed friend.
"...yes?" Izuku inquired, genuinely curious as he studied Kaminari's beaming face. Then, that smile turned into something more mischievous, and Izuku immediately regretted entertaining him. That couldn't be anything good.
Kaminari reached a hand out, stretching himself across the table and slapped him hard on the shoulder. Izuku flinched and rubbed the spot. "Dude! You just keep getting cooler! I was gonna ask you earlier but didn't find the time—anyways! I got so many questions man. First there was Stain and now the hand dude. So, how'd you—"
Izuku's expression fell. Right… he should have expected that someone would press him on that sooner or later. Before his spirited classmate could get out another word, Izuku rose to his feet and uttered the first lame excuse that came to his mind.
"Sorry, I just remembered something I had to ask Tiger… I'll be back later."
And he left.
He just barely managed to catch Uraraka muttering, "Great going…" before he was out the door.
Izuku wasn't entirely sure how he ended up here. All he knew was that he needed somewhere quiet where he could go over his thoughts alone, with no curious and babbling mouths interrupting him. He didn't have a specific goal in mind when he left the mess hall, instead allowing his feet to carry him wherever they took him. That place was apparently here, on a tall cliffside overlooking the Beast's Forest. The green trees looked black in the dark light and Izuku could just about make out the training site hiding amongst the treetops.
It was the perfect retreat for quiet introspection. Except, as it turned out, this spot had already been claimed.
Kota didn't turn to his approach, settling for emitting a terse grunt to show he was aware of the green teen's presence.
Izuku sat down next to him. He didn't quite understanding why he bothered, but decided that his legs must have carried him here for a reason. He observed the boy silently for a minute, before offering up a small greeting. "Hey," he said, not quite sure where he was going with this or what he was even trying to do. "What are you doing up here?"
"Sitting," came the simple answer. "What are you doing here?"
Izuku shrugged. "Just needed some space to think," he hummed. "The stars are nice tonight."
"I guess," Kota tilted his head. They sat there for what felt like a lot longer than it surely was. The only sound breaking up the silence was the singing crickets and their own quiet breathing, until the companionable silence was suddenly broken by a question. "Why are you here?"
Izuku frowned, cocking his head in light confusion. "Didn't you ask that already?"
"No, I mean," Kota gestured wide with his hands. "Why are you here?"
Green eyes blinked in confusion. "I'm not sure what you mean…?"
"I mean, why do you want to be a hero?"
Izuku was struck dumb for a moment. Where was this question coming from?
"I don't understand—"
"You're not like the others," Kota cut him off. "I can tell by looking at you. You've lost people too, haven't you?"
The young hero-to-be was stunned. He could tell? Just like that?
"...yes," came the hesitant answer before he shook his head, perhaps to clear his thoughts, before continuing the conversation. "Nevermind that. How is this relevant?"
Kota looked annoyed.
"How did they die?"
Izuku considered the question. How was he supposed to answer that? Oh you know, they were just brutally murdered over and over again as I watched, but hey! That was all in an alternative universe so they're not actually dead. No biggie.
"...they were killed by villains," he settled for instead, holding back the pessimistic bitterness in his voice as much as he could. Kota nodded in understanding, crossing his arms over his chest and grimaced with a click of his tongue.
"My mom and dad were killed by villains too," the young boy informed, voice unusually subdued. Izuku turned to him in surprise but didn't speak. "They were heroes. That's why they died."
A beat.
"Oh," Izuku replied, not sure what else to say. "I'm sorry."
Kota gave him a look.
"Shut up."
The teen frowned and scratched his neck awkwardly. "...sorry?"
Two small palms slammed against the rocky floor. "Seriously, stop it," Kota dismissed the apology, his chubby face drawn together into an irked look. "Everyone always says that and I don't get it. I know who killed my parents and it wasn't them, so why do they keep freaking apologizing about it?! As if that would make me feel better."
He turned away from the other to stare over the forest, suddenly silent. Then, he muttered softly, "You've lost people to villains too… do you want me to apologize for that?"
Izuku shook his head, even if if was impossible for Kota to see him at this angle. "No."
"Good, because I won't," he crossed his arms over his chest once more and Izuku had to keep in a giggle at the childish gesture. He didn't want Kota to start yelling at him again.
"So?" the smaller of the two said after a moment of nothing but the breeze passing between them. Izuku blinked dumbly.
"Huh?"
"Why do you want to be a hero?"
"Oh, right… sorr—" Izuku stopped himself. He wasn't sure if Kota would tell him to shut up again if he continued. He thought over the question for a brief moment. He didn't need much time. The answer was obvious. "Because I don't want to lose anyone again. I have to protect them."
Kota looked at him. Eyes solemn. "...even if you had to sacrifice yourself to do it?"
Izuku didn't hesitate. "Yes."
That was apparently the wrong thing to say as Kota rose suddenly, his whole body shaking with furious trembles.
"That's so selfish!" he shouted, angry tears blossoming in the corners of his eyes. "That's what's wrong with you heroes! You're always so ready to die to save others, but what about the people you leave behind?! Did they ask you to die for them?!"
"What are you…?" Izuku cautiously moved into a standing position as well, unsure of how to handle all the fury now unexpectedly directed at him.
"I'm sure dying to save others makes you feel real good about yourself," Kota continued, red faced. "But it's everyone else who has to deal with the fact that you're gone!" a broken sob tore through the angry barrage and the yelling turned into a hoarse whimper. "I would rather my parents were normal and alive than heroes and dead."
"Kota…" Izuku bit out. "I understand how you feel."
"Do you?" the boy glowered at him, his skepticism evident. "If you did, then why are you still training to be a hero?!"
"Because, while I understand losing your parents hurts… if it weren't for people like them, there would be many more people out there feeling like you do now," he took a deep breath. Kota still looked far from satisfied, but he wasn't crying any protests. "Maybe that doesn't make you feel better, but that's the truth."
The kid puffed. "Whatever," he looked away, refusing to meet the young heroes eyes. Izuku wasn't sure if he said the right thing or not, or if any of his words reached Kota. But he said what he wanted to say; it would be up to Kota whether he accepted it or not.
There was a tense thread hanging in the air, growing ever tighter as time went on. Izuku didn't know what would happen once it snapped, and decided he'd rather not find out. He needed to head back anyways, before someone came looking for him. That would be sure to make things even more awkward than they already were. He brushed the back of his pants, clearing it from stray dust and dirt before announcing, "I'm heading back."
Kota grunted. "Like I care."
Izuku began to turn around but paused, casting the young boy a last look. "...oh, and by the way; I'm not planning on dying any time soon. If I did, who would be there to protect the ones I care about? So… there's no need to worry about me."
Kota let out a squawk of indignity. "Worrying?! Who's worrying?! Dumbass! Don't go around putting words in my mouth!"
Izuku laughed lightly, the sound carrying in the chilled night breeze. "Take care Kota. Don't stay out too long."
And he left.
Notes:
Almost... there...
Poor Kaminari keeps saying the wrong things. :( It's not his fault he's an idiot. Haha.
Chapter 35: The Storm
Summary:
It's been too long since anything important happened. By this point, his nerves were wound so tight, he'd be relieved once the other shoe finally dropped.
Notes:
Every day I regret naming my story something so generic. But I'm afraid of changing it now or people may get confused. So guess we're stuck with this. But if I did change the name it would be King Nothing from the Metallica song:
"Careful what you wish, careful what you say
Careful what you wish, you may regret it
Careful what you wish, you just might get itThen it all crashes down, and you break your crown
And you point your finger, but there's no one around
Just want one thing, just to play the king
But the castle crumbled, and you're left with just a name
Where's your crown, King Nothing?"
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Izuku sat back hunched, legs bent, and stared listlessly at a pile of firewood. He'd just deposited it into the masonry heater, and lips pursed in deliberation while he tapped a finger against his thigh. He reached out to the leftmost piece, picking it up before plopping it down in the middle. He paused for a moment. Then, with a brisk shake of his head, he snatched it back and threw it to the right.
He glared.
With a meticulous sigh, he scooped all the pieces to the ground and started to rearrange them again from the beginning for the third time.
"It's all going to burn the same anyway… it's no big deal," he mumbled between pressed lips. With two motley sized pieces in his hands, he scrutinized them firmly. Should he put the bigger ones in the middle and the smaller ones on the side? Or would an even surface be better? What about the small ones in the middle and the bigger ones beside it?
He groaned. "No… that's stupid."
Dropping the blocks, he tried again.
He worked with a keen and single minded focus, when his interest was snagged by pair of familiar boots creeping into view. Izuku paused in his ministrations, looking up to meet a pair a dual colored eyes staring at him. He nodded in recognition.
"Todoroki."
"Midoriya."
The newcomer pointedly glanced to the pile of wood by the furnace. "Are you… doing okay?"
Izuku followed his line of sight. Then, he looked to the few scattered blocks of wood he'd managed to file onto the brickwork of what was to be their cooking station. He shrugged. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just trying to think of the best way to arrange this firewood."
"...oh," Todoroki nodded, though he did not look any less befuddled. "...why?"
Izuku tapped some kindling against his knee. It was the same question he'd asked himself each time he scrapped his work only to build the fire again back from scratch. Something nagged at him in the back of his head, whispering that it was absolutely imperative that he got this right, or something terrible was sure to happen. Which was ridiculous of course, but knowing that didn't make the voice any easier to ignore or feel any less real.
It's been too long since anything important happened. By this point, his nerves were wound so tight, he'd be relieved once the other shoe finally dropped.
Ignoring the woodpile's taunts for now, he dropped the piece in his hand and planted both palms on his knees. "So… Todoroki. What's up?"
"Um…" Todoroki averted his gaze. "Not much… I think. What, uh, what about you?"
"Same," Izuku nodded, very proud of his contribution to this riveting conversation. He glanced around. "Hey, have you seen Kota around anywhere?"
Todoroki looked thrown by the jump in conversation, muttering a quick, "Who?"
"Kota. That kid from earlier. You saw him when we first got here."
"Oh, yeah… I remember," Todoroki eyed their immediate surroundings before shrugging. "I don't know. Did you need something with him? I'm sure Mandalay can help you."
"Ah, no… not really," Izuku rubbed the back of his neck. "I was just thinking that he must get bored here, no other kids his age to play with and all… Just thought I'd check in, you know? Well, that and I…"
Their conversation from yesterday had kept Izuku up for the better part of the night. The words the child threw at him must have gnawed on Kota for some time. Did he ever talk about his feelings with Mandalay? Or anyone, for that matter? Losing your parents is never easy, nevermind losing them at such a young age. And the type of resentment Kota was showing… it's not the kind that goes away on its own. It just keeps growing.
Even though I want to talk to Mandalay about it, I know it's not my place… I'm just a stranger after all. And I know for sure I wouldn't enjoy having people talk about my personal issues behind my back…
"Midoriya."
Todoroki cut through his classmate's brooding when he called for Izuku's attention. Those mismatched eyes were focused on the other with a strange intensity, and not for the first time Izuku wished his classmate was easier to read.
"Forgive me if I'm misunderstanding something, but if you're trying to think of the right words to say to him to make him feel better or whatever… that might be impossible," he started. "There's not always a right combination of words that will automatically fix all of your problems. Out over that, before you help someone, that person must be willing to accept it in the first place. You can't force it."
Izuku knit his brows together. "You say 'might'... so, you're also saying there might be a way?"
"Yes," the other boy nodded. "Even if your words do not reach them at the moment, it can be the starting point for change… or it can be completely lost on them. The answer will only be known through time. What I'm trying to say is… not that you shouldn't try to help people, but rather… to not get your hopes up. Even if you give it your all and try your best, it won't always work out. And just because it doesn't work, it doesn't have to be through any fault of your own. Some things are just not meant to be. If we could all get what we wanted just by trying hard enough, the world wouldn't need heroes."
"So… keep trying but don't be disappointed if I fail?"
"Yeah… something like that," Todoroki gave an affirmative dip of his head. He looked unaccustomed to such long speeches, and was now fiddling with the sleeve of his shirt with a drained appearance. Wanting to reassure his classmates that all his effort weren't in vain, Izuku gave his most reassuring smile.
"I'll try to keep that in mind… thank you, Todoroki."
His... friend? Acquaintance? stiffly returned the gesture, though his posture did relaxed somewhat. He decided to leave Izuku to his business, wandering off to do whatever chores he'd been assigned before getting distracted by their conversation.
Hm, speaking of… why had he even approached Izuku in the first place? Had he really been that distracted by Izuku's self imposed job of building the perfect fireplace?
Come to think of it, even though I said all those things to him at the festival, we haven't really talked much outside of it… In fact, most of the time it's been Todoroki who'd approached me first—
Oh.
Izuku placed his face in his hands and groaned.
He's been trying to befriend me this whole time and I've just been brushing him off, haven't I?
Well, maybe not brushing him off exactly. But considering all the emotions they went through together during the festival, you'd figured it would have built some kind of kinship between them. Perhaps it had for Todoroki, and Izuku was too busy worrying about other things to notice the other's subtle attempts to grow closer. It must have been awkward for him, not having much experience how things like friendships worked and still trying hard to make one. Izuku could relate. Kacchan was the only one from his childhood whom he'd called a friend, until he got to U.A. and learned what the word actually meant with Iida and Uraraka.
Izuku staved off the urge to smack his face into the bricks of the furnace.
Well, it's never too late… right?
He nodded to himself. Next time he had lunch with his friends, he'd make sure to invite Todoroki as well.
Now, there's only one thing left…
Izuku looked at the pile of wood by his feet. Cupping his hands, he did his best to scoop up and balance the pieces together without dropping any. He threw them into the furnace.
"Perfect."
Izuku looked from the number eight in his hand to Bakugou and Todoroki scowling at each other. Or rather, Bakugou scowling whilst Todoroki looked as indifferent as always. Considering Izuku's earlier revelation, it was as if the universe just handed him the perfect opportunity to deepen the bond he promised to build.
Too bad he was about to throw it away.
He turned to Mandalay. "Um, excuse me… I was wondering, where's Kota? I thought he could join us in the test of courage… if he wants to, and if you're okay with it, that is."
Mandalay looked taken aback by the query, but her puzzlement was soon forgone in favor of a pensive smile. "Hm… that's a very nice idea, but I have a good feeling he'd refuse if you asked."
"Just asking couldn't hurt, right?" Izuku contended. "There's still time before my turn comes up. If I says no I'll just go alone."
The pro drummed a finger against her chin. She tapped it once, twice. "Well…" she flashed her teeth, before she used the very same hand to ruffle his green curls, turning them even wilder than they already were. She laughed. "Guess you're right! You can ask Ragdoll for his location. That kid has a special knack for disappearing; it's a good thing we have her quirk or I'd have to put a leash on him!"
"Don't worry, I got it," Izuku reassured, already jogging in place, "I have a good idea of where he is already. I won't be long!"
"Looks like my intuition was right."
Kota started, though he quickly hid his consternation with a scowl. "Ugh, you again… what do you want now?"
With years of practice, Izuku brushed the hostility off without so much as letting his smile falter. "We're taking a break from training to do a test of courage. I was wondering… if maybe you wanted to join us?"
He faltered halfway through his lines, but seeing as he'd already walked all the way up here, it'd be more awkward if he left without saying anything.
Once again, he caught Kota by surprise. But instead of the glares or insults you'd come to expect, the young boy grabbed the brim of his cap and pulled it low, leaving his face shadowed and unreadable.
"Jeez… you came all the way up here just to ask me that?"
"More or less," Izuku confirmed. "...I haven't heard a 'no' yet."
Ah, there was the glare. Thought this could only be called 'half-hearted' at best. It spoke of embarrassment over genuine anger.
"Ugh…" Kota groaned. "You're damn persistent… even if I told you to leave, would you even listen?"
"If you ask me to go, I'll go. But if you want to come with me…"
"Fine, fine! I'm going, I'm going!"
Kota folded his arms over his torso. "Just don't tell me my stupid aunt put you up to this."
"I promise you: this stupid idea was all my own."
The kid snorted. Feeling an odd sense of accomplishment, Izuku memorized the sound and filed it away as a win.
He reached a hand out.
"Let's go. I promised your aunt I'd be back before our turn came."
Kota scrunched his nose up. He inspected the offered appendage with suspicion. Izuku looked down.
Ah… I reached my hand out without thinking. Now Kota probably thinks I'm patronizing him.
Beaten, he fell back, dropping his arm slack by his side. Or, at least, that's what he would have done, were he not interrupted by an upheaval of noise and percussion as the world around him turned on its head. A cloud formed to blind his vision as stone crushed into sand; gravel beat against his skin like drops of rain, and it was pure instinct that propelled Izuku to jump in front of Kota to protect the smaller form with his own.
In the next moment, they were flying. His back felt like it had been torn through with an excavator—and they were flying. He couldn't even hear the soaring wind over the boy screaming in his ear. He didn't even feel the small hands digging into his broken ribs over the adrenaline that engulfed him like an old friend.
Ignoring his body's pains of protest, he pulled Kota close and covered him with as much of himself as possible. He turned until his back was angled toward the ground. It was already a mess; one more impact wouldn't make a difference.
He bounced when he landed, and he had to swallow the scream beating against his esophagus. He couldn't allow Kota to see any weakness. He couldn't allow the boy to hesitate when Izuku told him to run.
The first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was the stars. He wasn't even aware he had closed them. It could have been when that first burst of dust assaulted them, or it could have been his own instinctual reaction to protect himself from the pain he knew was coming. It didn't matter.
The stars were beautiful. Just as beautiful as they had been yesterday, shining bright like polished silver. He could make out a few constellations, thought no matter how hard he tried he could not remember any of the names.
He looked down. Lower. Lower. Lower.
It was on the cliff. Tall, and impossibly muscular. Behind the figure the cliff gaped open, a grand hole leading into darkness. Even from this distance, the bloodlust was unmistakable. It practically rolled off of him, reeking of death and cruelty. His teeth were showing, but to call it a smile felt like an insult. It was a twisted, wretched thing; the only joy behind it the thrill of pain he caused.
It was evil.
"Kota…" Izuku murmured. The figure in his arms chattered like a body naked in a blizzard. The older boy raised a trembling arm, stroking his fingers over the other's back in silent reassurance. "Run… Kota…"
Izuku's bloodied shirt grew even wetter as Kota shook his head furiously, rubbing snot and tears into his shoulder.
"N-no way… it's too late... too late…"
"Kota…"
Using what strength he still possessed, Izuku pushed at the smaller form. Kota clung valiantly to him, but eventually conceded and let himself be forced up onto his feet. Izuku heard a whoosh of air and a thump and he knew time was running short.
He looked up. The villain grinned at them just a few feet away. He arched his back, standing long and proud, like his very existence required celebration. His arms stretched out by his sides as if to embrace, but there was no mistaking the gesture for tenderness.
Their eyes met.
Izuku breathed.
In.
Out.
He stopped.
He allowed himself a moment. The rest of the world washed away as he felt every inch of his body. Every stab of pain, every creaking bone, every twitching muscle. He tried to assess the damage. He had to know how much time was left.
It won't be long.
Cracked ribs dug into his lungs, gouging into the organs further for each struggling breath he forced himself through. He coughed up the blood that poured into the many holes in his punctured respiratory system. He knew it was a losing battle, but that wasn't his concern. Izuku just wanted a few more seconds, a few more moment, before the reset.
Izuku pushed against Kota's legs, urging him.
"Kota," he repeated for a fourth time. His voice was as loud as he could make it, yet it was hardly even above a whisper. He swallowed, trying to look as composed as he could given the situation. "You don't have to be scared… alright?"
"Alright?!" the boy screeched, big fat tears rolling down his cheeks as he slowly started to back away from the villain's approaching form. "I-I'm not gonna be alright! Don't—don't lie to me! He… he killed you! You're already dead, don't you get it?!"
"I know."
Kota stumbled to a momentary stop. He looked unbelieving at the almost tranquil look on the teenager's face. Izuku forced their eyes to lock, gaze steady and unbreakable. He smiled. "I know there's no way I'll survive this. But you don't have to worry. Do you want to know why?"
The villain had stopped as well. Izuku could feel his attention on him. If he turned his face, he would see the man's artificial eye narrow in suspicion and mouth twist downward in displeasure. But he didn't. Instead, he ignored the stranger completely. The only thing of importance was the distraught child mourning in front of him.
"It's a secret, but I'll tell you," Izuku spoke slowly, each word a battle. But he pressed on, no minding how draining or painful it was. "It's because I'll be back, and then none of this will have ever happened. And it's going to happen again. And again. And again. As many times as it takes, until the only ones left standing are the two of us, together." Finally, he turned to look at the villain. He grinned. "You lost the moment you met me."
Kota dropped to his knees, sobbing. He twisted his hand into his shirt just above his heart, pulling at the fabric and throwing his head from side to side in repudiation. The villain's face coiled with furor.
"You brat—"
Izuku dropped his smile. He bore into the man. When he spoke, there was no enjoyment, no hatred, no anguish. Only caustic repose. "I know you don't believe me. Neither of you do. You must think I'm deluded, or that I've lost my mind. But that's alright. You don't have to believe me." He felt along the cuts and bruises over his body, running into every dip and over every bump. It stung. "Whether you believe me or not, none of that matter. It won't make what I'm saying any less true. And there's nothing… not you, not me… that can stop it."
His voice broke and he hacked out a phlegm of blood and spit. "It's… about to happen…" he could speak no more as his throat sized in a violent fit of barks and coughs. Breathing became impossible as every gasp for air just filled his lungs with more and more blood. It wasn't a pleasant way to go, but it wasn't the worst.
Before he died, he looked at the villain one more time. His face looked strange, forced into an expression that was surely unfamiliar to him.
It was doubt, in the way his muscles relaxed and went slack. And it was fear, in how his pupils shrunk and mouth opened just a fraction.
But it was just that. He was still confident, assured of his victory. He didn't believe the last words of the broken boy in front of him.
But you didn't need to believe to be afraid.
Izuku didn't believe in death.
But death was terrifying.
And like a lover's familiar embrace, the pain ebbed away and time turned on its axis.
For once, there wasn't any shame or guilt in Izuku's heart. For he had already won without anyone ever realizing it.
Because that man never laid one finger on Izumi Kota.
Notes:
Man, I hated writing the first part of this chapter... I did not like it at all, but I think it turned out a lot better in my second draft. Also, that whole sequence was basically just me facepalming at myself when I realized I've basically been ignoring Todoroki for a good part of this fic. I'm gonna try to change that. In any case I'm glad to get the boring parts out of the way and now we can get back to the suffering. (The real reason this story's chapters were so short in the begining was because I wanted to skip the boring parts and get right to the good stuff, before I decided to start fleshing things out more because I like torturing myself I guess.) But damn, there's only so many ways I can thing of how to describe someone getting brutally torn apart.
Fun fact: I wrote the bit with Muscular a long time ago. Sometimes I like skipping ahead in the story and writing upcoming parts because I can't wait.
Also, kudos to the commenter who figured out where I was going with the chapter titles. Maybe it wasn't that hard to guess but still, kudos, haha.
Chapter 36: Certainty
Summary:
Izuku and Muscular goes for round two.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
"Kota," Izuku pulled his hand back abruptly. "We need to leave."
Kota gave him a confused glare. "...why?"
"Call it a hero's intuition," the student forced out between clenched teeth, grabbing the younger by the nape of his shirt and pulling him bumbling into his legs. Kota let out a high pitched yelp, quick to struggle against the diamond grip. "Something bad is about to happen."
Kota drummed his small fists into his side. "Let me go, stupid!"
Izuku ignored the kid's struggles. He heard the explosion before he saw it, and didn't bother to turn his head back to look before he dove over the cliff's edge. Despite what happened last time, he still lacked a proper plan for what his next step should be, only thinking as far as 'getting the fuck away from this murderous asshole'. He hadn't a clue of how he was going to nail this landing without breaking something or worse, but he had plenty of tries to work with. Right now, his number one priority was finding out what the fuck this guy's deal was.
Mid-air, he angled his head to scowl at the very miffed-looking villain left behind in the dust. Guess the man didn't expect his victims to make such a quick escape. Izuku narrowed his eyes, cradling a now very terrified child close to his chest.
"What's happening?!" Kota cried, clawing at Izuku's arms before clamping down on them like his life depended on it, which it very well might. Izuku dismissed that thought.
"It's a villain," Izuku provided, perhaps superfluous. "I don't know how he knew we were here or what he wants, but it doesn't matter."
"It doesn't?!"
"No. Because either way, I'm gonna win."
Maybe it was the confidence in his words. Maybe it was shock. But despite the clear skepticism Kota displayed when he looked at him, his grasp lessened minutely.
"Oh… okay."
The whisper was almost lost to the wind's wail, but to Izuku, those words were more important than anything else. It was a small victory in a mountain of bullshit, and that meant everything when you had nothing else.
Ignoring the villain behind him, Izuku considered his next steps.
The forest. Trees.
Clipped phrases moved straight to the point, filtering out anything deemed inconsequential.
Use them to break your fall.
Setting his course for a thicket of leaves and branches wasn't the easiest thing when free-falling through the air with a terrified child in his arms, but Izuku had worked with worse odds. Momentarily, he shifted his arms to free up one limb while still holding Kota tight with the other. The young boy crushed his face into his protector's shoulder, bunching up the fabric of Izuku's dark green tee and pulling on it to the point of breaking to keep from screaming. The other gave him what he hoped was a comforting squeeze, before using his free hand and aimed it behind him before flicking his fingers.
With a bit of One for All, the air pressure pushed them closer to the emerald crown and he moved his feet in front of him to take on the brunt of the damage. He returned his one armed grip of Kota into two, hugging him close to give him the fullest protection he could and slammed into the vegetation with a grunt. Branches broke their decent, scratching his arms into a spiderweb of maroon, but otherwise leaving him relatively unarmed, excluding a few bumps and bruises.
Rather this than a hole through my back.
He gingerly unfurled from his protective stance, dropping his charge by his feet and taking a step back.
"What are you doing?!" Kota still held his shirt hostage in a death grip. "Don't leave me!"
"Of course I'm not leaving you," Izuku frowned. He'd almost be offended by the notion if the child didn't look so scared. "I'm just gonna take care of the problem while you stay here. Okay?"
"No!" the kid tugged on the fabric. His voice cracked with dismayed ire. "You're gonna take care of it?! You're not even a real hero! You're just a wanna-be! What do you think you can do? Don't—don't leave me—"
"Kota."
The boy flinched back with force. His hat had fallen off at some point during their tumble so his hand grasped at nothing when it moved up to pull at the brim in reflex. He settled for covering his face with his palm, blocking off Izuku and resolutely refusing to face him.
Izuku sighed. "I get it. I'm supposed to grab you and run and tell the pros what's happening here and let them deal with it. Right? That's what you're thinking, isn't it?"
Kota didn't answer, but his silence spoke enough.
"It's fine to think that. You're not wrong. That is what one would normally do. It's what you should do. But I won't, and I'm gonna tell you why. I know what's going to happen. And I'll tell you."
The child had removed his hand and was looking at him now. His wavering gaze swam with uncertainty, but there was a spark of hope too. Or the wish for hope at least.
"If I run now, people will get hurt. It's inevitable. And if there's a way for me to stop it and I throw that chance away… that's what you'd call 'evil', isn't it? But don't worry. I meant what I said before.
"I'm going to win."
Something buzzed behind him. A sonorous cackling laugh, like a mix between a swarm of bees and yapping wolves, pulled straight from the gut and cutting the atmosphere with its mockery.
"Oooh, looks like we've got a brave one. That's great. Great. You know, making shitty brats like you cry for mommy just as you finish your awe-inspiring speech is my favorite. Fucking hilarious. Especially when I get to watch the people who believed in you realize that all your gallant posturing was just a load of bullshit."
The man expelled another raucous round of laughter, like he just said something profoundly clever. Izuku whirled around with a sneer. Putting his canines on display, he flexed his fists and snarled.
"The only bullshit posturing I see here is you. What—too afraid to pick on someone your own size? Is killing little kids the only time you get to feel brave?"
"Haaa—" the man's smile was wiped away in an instant like a whip to the face. He quirked one bright blonde brow into an angry frown, the other missing completely as it had been permanently erased by an old mottled scar that split his face in two. In the middle of the pink and damaged skin bulged an eye that looked much to glassy to be anything but artificial. It was surrounded by a framework of metal, serving functions Izuku could only theorize on. "Wow. You sure got a mouth on you, dontcha? You pissant. Can't wait to hear your screams when I tear your fucking tongue out."
"Good luck with that," Izuku growled. "But I think that's gonna be hard when I've broken all your limbs, you absolute piece of human refuse."
The villain rumbled deep in his chest, an echo chamber of acrimony. He raised a trunk of an arm and Izuku squinted. Was he growing? Or was the dark just playing tricks on him? No—his arm was definitely getting bigger. Threads of crimson climbed the limb like snakes curled around prey to squeeze the life out it. It almost looked like—
Muscle fibers?
The red was a meaty hue that reminded Izuku of too many past mistakes, climbing up the villain's side and growing his arm into sizes even larger than before. As if he wasn't already freakishly big, now he began to look like something out of an old school monster movie. This must be his quirk then; some type of muscle manipulation perhaps? Izuku would have to do a few tests before he could draw any proper conclusions.
"Oh—by the way, I just realized! Your face! I know you!"
Izuku was taken aback at the villain's seemingly out of the blue announcement. He burst into another cacophony of whooping amusement, slapping a knee and looking genuinely tickled. Like there was some inside joke only he understood.
"You… do?" Izuku couldn't help his wonder take the better of him. It was one of his best traits after all. Or worst, depending on who you asked.
Curiosity killed the Deku, but who's counting?
"Oh, oh yeah." The man's quirk wavered slightly from his merry fit, red strings retracting for a moment, but quickly returned to their previous state as their user forced himself to calm down between bouts of stray chuckles. "Oooh, I've heard allll about you. Well, everything that man knows, that is. Shigaraki? Yeah, you know him. Man, he couldn't stop going on about all the things he would do once he finally got his hands on you. Not gonna lie, I've got a strong stomach, but that shit was disturbing. Funny, but disturbing.
"Actually, I'm not supposed to kill you. Mr. Hands wants the honor all to himself, yada yada. I don't really care about all that shit he rambled about. Sure, if I capture you semi-alive that'd be nice I guess, but I won't cry over spilt milk if things go sideways. Especially now that you've pissed me off. Fuck. I think I get what Shigaraki mean now. Maybe I'll just fucking kill you after all."
"...oh," Izuku nodded. "Yeah. That makes sense. He looked pretty pissed after I broke his wrists back then. I'd be surprised if he didn't want to torture me to death after that."
The villain's lips twitched. He looked vaguely amused by Izuku's casual delivery, but was still too annoyed to show it. He drew in a phlegm of saliva, spitting it out on the ground by his boots.
"Enough talk," he declared, contracting his quirk enhanced arm. "I've stared at your stupid face long enough. If I go another second without punching it, I will burst a vein."
He didn't leave room for any witty retorts before catapulting himself toward the other. Izuku only had a split second to make his choice: dodge, block or counter. If this was a regular fight, avoiding the blow entirely would be his first instinct. Despite the limited knowledge he possessed of his opponent, it was obvious that any defense he put up would be blown through effortlessly.
Should he stand his ground and take it anyway? Would it teach him anything he didn't already know about the enemy's capabilities? It'd probably kill him, but—
Izuku sucked in a sharp breath and pushed his feet back. The arm barely grazed him, yet he could still feel pain bloom by the point of impact. It was sure to leave bruises later—assuming he lived that long, that is.
Frantically, he searched for Kota. The boy hadn't moved an inch from where he left him, frozen to the spot and mouth ajar in a noise that never came.
"Don't just stand there!" Izuku screamed at him, hoping to knock the boy out of his stupor. "Go, hide! I'll take care of this guy and then we'll both go find your aunt together!"
As the words left his mouth, Izuku's eyes widened with a sudden realization. Perhaps it was a bit too late for it to hit him now, and he'd probably been vaguely aware ever since the villain first blew a hole through him. But in his defense, he'd been too busy with more pressing thoughts to truly let the situation sink in until this very moment.
Kota had at the very least reacted to his words, and was now floundering backwards with a still paralyzed expression, just barely catching himself on his hands as he careened over a stubborn rock that ambushed his heel. Quickly, he rolled over and pushed himself back up, only looking over his shoulder once before distancing himself from the battlefield and dashing into the shadows of the forest. Izuku could see him peeking out from behind some branches and figured it would have to do.
Knowing Kota was as safe as could be given the situation, he zeroed back in on the enemy. He glared at the man, exuding as much animosity as he could and pointed an accusing fist his way.
"Hey, you're not alone here, are you?! You mentioned Shigaraki before so that must mean you're working for him. Is he here too?! Who else did he send?!"
Were his classmates already brawling for their lives while he was too busy dealing with this wanna-be Hulk to help them?
The villain—Izuku really needed a name for him, just calling him 'the villain' was growing kind of tiresome—scratched his face, running chipped nails over the mottled blushing flesh covering the better part of his face.
"And why would I tell you any of that?"
"You already told me he wants to capture and torture me. Besides, you're gonna kill me here anyways, so what's answering a few more questions?"
"Hm…" the man snorted, rubbing his chin. "Yeah, okay, that's fair. No, 'big man' ain't here, too lazy or too pussy I guess. Or he figured he got better things to do. I don't know the names of all the extras he sent, bunch of tools if you ask me. Especially that fire fuck, but they do have some nice power. Probably busy slaughtering your friends as we speak. Hmmm, toasty."
He guffawed at his own joke, and Izuku stored away the new information for later. Fire quirk, huh? Don't think I've died that way yet.
"And, um…" Izuku huffed. It was worth a shot. "What's your quirk anyway? It looked like you were manipulating your muscle fibers before. Is that right?"
The man blinked. "Yeah, pretty much." To accentuate his words, he flashed his quirk until both arms were covered in ropes of bulging and pulsating masses of flesh, looking like disgusting tumors. "Pretty neat, huh? Perfect for pulverizing anyone that gets in my way. Like snotty green-haired brats, for example."
"Don't doubt it…" Izuku murmured. He called upon the power of One for All and felt the familiar energy heat up his muscles. There was just one more thing. "By the way… what's your name?"
The tower of a man paused for a moment, studying him with mismatched eyes. He clicked his tongue. "You know. Most times, the villain will usually introduce himself before anyone even asks the question. And if they don't, the police are usually the ones left to find out the answer."
"Yeah? Are you going somewhere with this?"
"No. Just thought it was funny… figures a weird kid like you would be the one to break tradition.
"It's Muscular, kid. Though I don't think you'll need to remember it for long."
This time, Izuku was the first to move. He went for a straightforward punch, imploring that his speed be enough to throw the other off and allow for an easy jab. Muscular stood his ground, raising both arms in a guard. Hitting him was like striking a brick wall, and when Izuku's knuckles struck its target he cried out as he felt his bones crack and grind against each other into twisted angles from the pressure.
He retreated, slightly dazed and jarred by how absolutely ineffective his attack had been. Muscular hadn't budged and inch, and his arms looked none the worse for wear. He reached out to grab him, but Izuku dashed to safety before the ominous fist could close around him. He pulled his swollen fingers to his chest, cradling them delicately. That had been thirteen percent, the highest output he could manage before breaking his body apart like an overripe melon.
Shit—what should I try next? Twenty? Or should I just go all in?
This would have been less of a dilemma if there wasn't more villains for Izuku to deal with after this one. Cracking a few bones was a given, but he couldn't break himself down too early.
He's only been using his arms thus far. What about the rest of his body?
Using his already broken hand, Izuku used another thirteen percent and shot for Muscular's legs. The man didn't even bother to avoid it, telling Izuku that this was a futile endeavor before he even got to the results. His suspicions were confirmed when his bruised knuckles smacked into what was previously regular skin, now pulsating with crimson threads.
"I can control all the muscle fibers in my body as I'd like. If that puny punt is the best you've got, then this is gonna be even easier than I thought."
Izuku only had enough time to slur a curse before Muscular grabbed him by the back of his shirt and rammed a knee into his rib cage. He gasped as all air was crushed from his lungs. His body refused to cooperate when he tried to pull new oxygen into his body, sending him into an abrupt delirious panic. He felt heady as he slumped bonelessly to the ground as Muscular released his hold. For a moment, all rational thoughts escaped him and he forgot what he was doing, until a frenzied wail was kind enough to put him back on track.
"Deku!"
Shit—Izuku shoved himself onto all fours and jumped back into a fighting stance, even as his ribs protested against him. He was pretty sure they were busted again, no surprise there. His lungs had at least quit their seizing and he could gulp in some much needed fresh air, which cleared up some of the fog in his head.
Muscular crossed his arms, leering at him with a nasty smirk. "I'll give it to ya, kid. You've got some quick recovery time. Most people would be busy rolling on the floor by now."
Izuku coughed, but didn't respond. His body felt sluggish after his abuse, and he tried his best to rearrange his thoughts in order so that he could hopefully form some sort of plan. It proved to be a challenge when he still felt on the verge to throw up his dinner and his eyeballs threatened to escape his skull from the veins throbbing hard behind them.
If thirteen isn't enough… I'll just have to up the ante.
He jumped. With an animalistic warcry, he smashed into Muscular's shoulder at thirty percent. He was still using his pulverized fist, figuring he might as well put it through its paces until he was physically incapable of doing any more. The man tensed as the hand plowed into him, but remained rooted to his place. He still had his arms crossed, content to watch Izuku's seemingly futile struggle to put a dent in him.
The student reeled back, and before gravity put him back on the ground, he smashed his loosely clenched fist into the same spot once, twice, increasing his power by ten percent for each hit. Finally, he dropped to his feet and glared down at his hand with a look of betrayal. It was hardly held together by this point, just a pulp of sinew and muscle and powered bone.
He switched arms, using a sixty percent smash and aimed it for Muscular's face. The villain quickly uncrossed his arms and pulled them up to ward off the blow, One for All bouncing off it like rain on plastic. Following in the theme of everything else Izuku had done up to this point, he only managed to hurt himself more than he hurt the villain. Yet, his opponent's seemingly ordinary action gave him pause.
He put a few meters distance between himself and the enemy, dropping his massacred hands to his hips. "Why did you block me?"
Muscular pressed his lips into a tight line.
"Is there something I could have actually hurt if I hit your face?" Izuku made a move to bring his fingers up to cup his chin, but winced when he was painfully reminded of the exercise he put them through. He aborted the action, but that didn't stop him from falling into one of his patented mumble tirades. "Is it possible that your quirk doesn't extend to your face? No, you said earlier that you can control all the muscles in your body. So if that's not it, then it must mean—"
"You talk too much."
It was the last thing Izuku heard before an arm tore through his sternum. He blinked. He was vaguely aware of Kota screaming his name in the background, and he watched uncomprehending as his guts spilled to his feet.
Oh, he thought with a wet cough, just before the reset took hold of him. I think I get it now.
Notes:
Muscular talks up a storm and then he complains when Izuku does a bit of mumbling, smdh.
Not gonna lie, writing Muscular's dialogue was pretty fun. But man, does the guy know how to talk or what? It wasn't intentional but eh, that's what we've got now. I like dialogue in stories, it's my favorite parts. It's also pretty fun to write Deku sassing him.
I actually had to do some planning for this arc. I usually just write as I go, but there's a lot that happens this arc so I had to sit down and think it through a bit. Now I've got some vague idea of where to go. I know how it will end, I just wasn't quite sure of the in-betweens.
Chapter 37: Anatomy of a Villain
Summary:
Izuku tries and tries again.
Notes:
W-what? An update within less than a month's interruption? Nani?!
It's just as unlikely as you think.
This chapter has extra foul language compared to the usual. Thank Muscular.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"Don't leave me!"
If he had to rate his landing technique, he'd give himself a seven out of ten. Could use some work, but pretty decent all thing considered.
He patted Kota's head with a hum. "Go and wait behind that tree over there, please. I'll be back soon."
"What?" Kota gaped at him. His pupils narrowed to pricks and he glowered with something akin to betrayal. "No, don't you dare—"
"Don't worry. I've got a pretty good idea of how to deal with this guy… I think."
"You think?!"
"Eighty percent sure?"
"Quit your blabbering and face me, you brats!"
Izuku cocked his head. He scowled at Muscular, who stood flexing his biceps behind the duo. Izuku pushed gently on Kota's shoulder.
"Come on," he urged, casting a beseeching look the other's way. "I promise I'll be back for you."
Kota's lower lip trembled. He looked like he wanted to interject, but when he glanced over to the posturing villain, a heart stricken expression jumped his face. His hat had survived the fall this time, so he pulled it over his eyes before leaving with hurried steps to hide behind the trunk of the closest tree, as per Izuku's instruction.
The teen turned to his adversary. He took a moment to consider his options. With a pull of his mouth and a shrug, he went ahead and asked what had been on his mind since the last reset.
"I'll fight you, but before that… what can you tell me about the other villains that came here with you?"
Muscular tilted his head. "Hm… them? I don't really give a shit about them so I can't tell you much. Not that it would help anyways, since you—"
"—'ll be dead soon, yeah. But come on. There must be something you can tell me about them. How many are there? What are their quirks?"
Muscular made a strange face at the string of questions. It was something like a pout while simultaneously showing of his clenched teeth. He looked like he was itching to punch something, but evidently liked the sound of his own voice enough to humor his would-be victim.
"What is this, an interview? But fine, fine, I'll play along… not counting me, seven. No, wait, eight! Maybe nine."
Izuku kept a frustrated sigh at bay. He waited for Muscular to continue digging his party's own grave.
"There's the crazy bitch—not sure what her deal is, or her quirk for that matter—and then there's the fire fuck. Asshole think he's cosplaying a scarecrow or something. There's also the ninja turtle wannabe and… ugh," the man shook his head. He creased a thin ash-blonde eyebrow. "I changed my mind. This is boring. Why the fuck am I answering some little punk's questions when I could just pound him to dust instead?"
Izuku widened his stance but kept his arms by his sides. "Because you're such a nice, upstanding citizen?"
Muscular raised a brow. Apparently, he didn't see fit to deign Izuku's banter with a response, settling for a silent scowl. The bushy haired boy bit into his cheek. He raised his guard.
"Well… let's see if you could answer one more question for me."
He jumped. With a horizontal launch, he raced fist-first toward the man like some two-bit amateur. Or like a student with no prior fighting experience. Muscular grinned, raising his pulsating red-threaded arms in front of him. Just before the moment of impact, Izuku unclenched his fingers and switched from the perfectly televised punch to a grapple. He curled the digits around a bulging wrist, so thick his thumb didn't even touch the tips of the rest of his fingers. Muscular's face changed from already assured victory to surprise as Izuku used his secure hold to swing his legs up like some kind of circus act, the tips of his feet aimed for a single minded goal.
Muscular turned his head just in time before a One for All infused kick smacked into his temporal bone. Izku tsked, but his effort weren't for nothing as he heard a deep howl leave the villain. The hero-to-be's target had been the man's artificial eye, and while most of his foot missed the mark due to his enemy's sharp maneuvering, his heel still managed to jostle its position in its socket. Apparently, the sensation was less than pleasant.
"It's like I thought," Izuku disclosed his observation aloud as he dropped to the floor. "Any place that doesn't have muscles is completely vulnerable."
Muscular birthed an unholy screech, jumping for Izuku's throat, looking ready to snap his throat like a candy bar. Izuku flicked the air next to himself, sending him tumbling to the side with a little too much force.
"Oof," he complained as he rolled over the ground. A few stray rocks dug into and stuck to his cheek. "You're also easy to rile up."
"YOU LITTLE FUCK!" Muscular roared, mouth practically frothing as he whirled to face the teen. "I'm gonna make you pay for that that, you cocksucker!"
Like an angry bull seeing red, he charged for Izuku, screaming the whole way. His quirk practically tore his body apart, and Izuku had to admit the sight was kinda goddamn terrifying. Still, he couldn't let fear's chill take hold of him, and was quickly back on his feet, ready to jump out of the stampeding villain's path. The sequence reminded him of a boss fight in a video game, where the player had to dodge attacks with perfectly timed button mashes and watch as the enemy, either blinded by rage or too dumb to stop, smacked into a pillar or wall to be stunned just long enough for the hero to make a move. Though Izuku doubted things would work so conveniently in real life, sadly.
It really was unfortunate that Muscular caught onto Izuku's plan to quickly, the teen thought as he bound out of the way of the lunging behemoth. Now the man was sure to be on even higher alert than earlier, and Izuku doubted he'd get another crack at the madly spinning mechanical eye any time soon. At least he'd proven his theory true, so even if he died here, it wouldn't be a complete waste. Now, he only needed to figure out how to best utilize that information.
He cupped a handful of dirt, throwing it in the villain's face. Muscular shielded himself with an arm, and Izuku used the brief moment of blindness to rush toward the man, before dropping low to slide across the ground. The friction tore a path through the dirt, and his clothes ripped along with his skin. Fresh wounds burned unpleasantly as earth got into the lacerations, but Izuku brushed it off with practiced ease.
He leapt straight up like a jack rabbit once he crossed under the boundary of Muscular's guarding limb, almost touching noses with the other as they stared face to face for the briefest of moments. Izuku was about to tear the man's prosthetic eye out, but from the corner of his eye he saw his opponent's free arm put in motion. With the realization that he wouldn't be fast enough, he settled for his next best choice, and slammed his forehead into the fake-eye as hard as he could.
Muscular was stunned as another tide of pain pulsed through him, and he wobbled slightly. Any of his previous plans of action was put on hold as he recuperated, and Izuku used the moment to complete his own aim. He latched himself around Muscular's torso using his knees, before thrusting his palms out and scratched at the other's face with violent vigor.
"Jesus Christ!" Muscular swore, swatting at Izuku's abdomen like a fly, pushing the teenager off and sending him crashing into the ground. Izuku wheezed, but that was all. No blood or gore. The agony he inflicted on the other must have been intense enough that Muscular was unable to muster up his full strength to smack Izuku around like a piñata. "Enough of this!" the man roared. He flexed his body, muscles growing to sizes previously unseen. Now Izuku thought this really must be some type of video game, with Muscular entering his second phase.
If this is a video game I really hope there's some sort of cheat code, Izuku grimaced. I'm tired of running around with one life but infinite retries.
Muscular ran at him with outstretched arms and a wild snarl. Izuku readied his stance. Seconds before clashing, the big man changed his course and ran past the teen, jumping into the thicket of trees behind him. Izuku's eyes widened, and with blind panic and righteous furor, he erupted with a scream and sprung up on the villain's back with a One for All aided pounce.
"Don't you dare touch him!" he howled, pulling Muscular into a choke hold, not even considering the futility of the action. All he knew was that the man needed to hurt, hurt him enough that he'd never again consider touching a hair of—
Muscular jumped. He pulled at Izuku's wrists into a bone breaking hold, before tilting his body backward mid-air. The teen could only gape as he realized his opponent's intention. He wondered if it was all planned since the moment the man changed his focus from Izuku to Kota.
What the fuck—
If it was possible to crack a person's bones all at once like a hazelnut on Christmas, then Muscular figured it out. At least the shock was great enough that Izuku hardly even felt it when the villain suplexed his body into the ground. He crushed the student with the flat of his back into the earth, filling the air with the sound of a multitude of foreboding pops and snaps that Izuku could only begin to guess the origin of.
All things considered, it wasn't the worst way to go.
"Stay here and don't come out until I tell you to, alright?"
Izuku shoved the horned cap over Kota's head and turned to face his opponent for the fourth time. His last mistake was being goaded into doing what Muscular had expected him to do. Well, if the man wanted to play mind games, then so could he.
"Hello Muscular," he called out, mouth drawn and a sporting a severe glare. The aforementioned man looked momentarily surprised by the call of his name, but was quick to shrug it off.
"Heh, you recognize me? I guess I did make some pretty big waves back when I killed those heroes."
Izuku paused. No, he was not aware that this villain had killed heroes before. While the fanboy had the ability to name more or less every hero under the sun no matter how minor, he rarely took the time to memorize villains. Not until recently, that is.
Muscular looked much too proud of himself. He wore a self satisfied smirk that showed off all his teeth, curling up the corners of his disproportionate eyes. A hollow feeling settled in Izuku's chest, before it was replaced by burning fire. Not allowing Muscular the chance to put him off his game, he stalked up to his opponent with an even gait.
"Right," he bit out, unwilling to give Muscular any more gratification than he could help. "Well, maybe you recognize me too. Midoriya Izuku. Ring any bells?" Muscular scratched his shaggy ash-colored hair, pursing his lips with contemplation as he stared the teenager down. Impatient, Izuku provided the man with another hint. "Come on. I'm sure Shigaraki mentioned me to you. Probably something about how he would torture me to death? I mean, I did make some pretty big waves back when I broke both his wrists."
Muscular's eyes lit up with recognition. Good. He never said anything about knowing Izuku last time, but that was likely thanks to him being too angry to pay enough attention to his challenger's face.
The man grinned. "Oh yeah," he bellowed out a laugh. "Now I remember. Midoriya Izuku, that's right. Shigaraki—" he halted in the middle of his dialogue, sadistic delight altering into perplexity. He made a face, studying Izuku with a suspicious glare. "Hold on. Why the hell are you assuming I know who Shigaraki is? Do you think all us villains like to gather for shindigs on the weekends or something?"
Izuku titled his head innocently. "You don't? Then what do you do on the weekend? Steal candy from little babies?"
"Haha. Very funny," Muscular audibly ground his teeth together. Belying his words, he looked far from amused. "You've got some inside information I was not aware of, or did you just make a lucky guess?"
"Hm…" Izuku smiled. "Wouldn't you like to know?"
Muscular growled, clearly agitated at the non-answer. He covered both arms in reinforced muscle fiber, and looked ready to grind the puny little student in front of him into minced meat. Izuku thought back to what happened last time, musing to himself.
If I could only get his eye, I could severely handicap him. But even with One for All, this guy's reflexes are crazy fast. As soon as I aim for his face, he'll know what's up.
They circled each other like two boxers ready to square off in the ring. Izuku continued to run down his options.
I know what I said about Shigaraki tripped him up, but it won't be enough on its own to gain the upper hand. Come on, think, his eyes can't be the only weak spot—
His eyes lit up with an old memory. Kacchan's and his own mother had set up a game night and forced the two boys to attend. Not that Izuku could ever say no to his mom. They had been about ten by then, and they had settled for a trivia board game after much discussion. It was geared toward a slightly older audience than the children had been, but they didn't have many options to pick from.
Kacchan carried a sour expression with him most of the night, while Izuku tried his best to act normal in front of the two mothers. They were still under the impression that the two boys were best of friends, which, in a way, they were. Just not the way Izuku wanted them to be.
"Alright Izuku, it's your turn."
He eyed the fists clenched by Muscular's hips.
"Hey, Katsuki! Give me the damn card, you brat!"
"Hey, Muscular. You wanna know a fun fact?"
"Okay, okay, let's see… the question is—"
He kicked the tip of his boots into the ground, using his quirk to punt a mound of dirt in Muscular's direction. The man took a step back, raising a hand to slap the offending muck away. With one leg still raised in the air, Izuku performed a one-legged jump and pirouetted through the air almost gracefully, albeit unintentionally. He latched onto his opponent's hovering limb, clinging on tight with the inner side of his elbow with one arm, while the other traveled up to slot his fingers in between Muscular's, palm to palm.
"How many muscles does your fingers have?"
Izuku hoisted himself up along the limb with his legs, until he was eye to eye with the villain himself.
"All the muscles controlling your fingers exist in your palm and arm. The rest is just tendons."
He flexed his hand. And he pushed.
Pop.
Muscular roared as several cracks resounded from his twisted digits. Izuku pushed off with his soles against the other's abs to soar to safety, before his opponent had a moment to counter act.
"You—absolute fucker!" the blonde man grit his teeth, and Izuku could tell the villain did his damnedest to endure the pain he'd just been subjected to.
One hand down, Izuku counted. Another to go.
It wasn't particularly hard to incapacitate Muscular's other fingers. Izuku had expected his enemy to put up more resistance, but it seemed like the man didn't have the greatest tolerance for pain. He probably wasn't used to actually taking damage, so when he did, his instincts went into overdrive. With a primitive and uncontrollable anger, Muscular flung his remaining fist around without much thought of where it went. He did manage to knock it into Izuku's jaw hard enough to leave an impressive bruise for later, but no bones were broken, no joints dislocated and no teeth lost. It was easy to capture the fist and pull the fingers back until they touched the back of Muscular's hand with the accompanying series of snaps.
All in all, Izuku felt pretty good.
Deeming Muscular sufficiently handicapped, it was time to carry out what would hopefully be the last step of his plan. Gouging his fingers in between the metal frame of Muscular's artificial eye and its socket was a lot easier when the villain's means of fighting back had been cut down a few notches. He could still swing his arms and legs around, sure. He even tried his damnedest to bite at Izuku whenever the boy got too close to the other's eager teeth, but it was a lot easier to avoid attacks when his perpetrator couldn't hold him down without hugging him with both arms.
That's not to say it was a walk in the park. Aside from his jaw, Izuku sustained a few more bumps and tender spots as he was jostled around attempting to climb the villain like a monkey in a tree. He went up Muscular's back to avoid the hug of death, not too worried about being body slammed like last time. The man could try, but it would be easy for the teen to jump off to safety, and Muscular would only find himself in a new vulnerable position lying supine on the floor with Izuku unharmed above him.
The man opted for shaking his body around like a wet dog to throw him off instead, but Izuku held firm. He snaked his fingers over Muscular's scar and dug the tips in between folds of skin. The man swore at him. He kicked his feet up behind him, and Izuku grunted as they smacked into his calves, but he refused to let go. Realizing his tactic wasn't working, Muscular pulled his arms behind himself in an attempt to crush the boy against his back using his flexor muscles.
Izuku locked his elbows around his enemy's neck and lifted his lower body into the air to avoid the assault. His stomach, back, arms and legs all tensed to be hard as steel with the effort; thank God for All Might's strength training.
"Stop struggling!" Izuku growled in frustration. "Just fucking let me do this already!"
Still suspended in the air—he didn't trust Muscular's arms under him—he pushed the digits of his right hand up to crawl along the villain's face. The left he used to grab onto a stark-red shoulder, the fold of his arm locked around the man's neck.
Finally reaching his goal, Izuku infused his fingers with One for All, before plunging them as deep into the socket as they could go. He grabbed a hold of as much as he could and then, he pulled.
Muscular let out an ungodly shriek as whatever used to occupy his skull dropped down on the dirt floor with a soft clatter of gears and screws and glass. He gave an unusually strong twist of his shoulder, and Izuku's grip slipped. He fell, bouncing back a few meters on his toes. Muscular brought a mess of a hand up to cup against the gaping hole in his head. Izuku absentmindedly rubbed his fingers against one another, stinging slightly from the metal previously digging into them.
He felt something wet. He looked down and saw his hand covered in blood. From the sheer amount of it, and the lack of visible cuts, he knew it didn't belong to him for once.
Muscular turned—stumbled, more like—half blind to face the student that just messed his face up worse than it already was. Izuku could see a river of red press out from under the palm pushed up against the villain's ugly scar. It was an alarming volume of blood, but Muscular still remained standing, looking more pissed than anything Izuku had ever seen. Maybe even more pissed than Shigaraki after having his wrists broken.
"You…" Muscular opened his mouth. He gaped like an opened bag of chips for a moment, making gasping and gargled noises as he tried to come up with his best threat or insult. Probably both. He looked lost. "You took my eye… you crazy fucking psycho! My goddamn eye! You piece of cum guzzling shit pile! I'll kill you! I'll fucking kill you, you, you worthless, good for nothing, masquerade of a hero!"
Izuku grimaced. "I'm the psycho? You're the one trying to kill a little kid! And you're calling me the psycho?"
The hypocrisy pissed Izuku off more than the insults themselves.
"You're just a wanna-be!" Muscular repeated, voice shrill with glee. He grinned, but struggled to secure it. "I've fought a buncha heroes before you! Killed some too! And you better believe I enjoyed it! So sure, I'm a psychopath, but at least I never pretended to be something I ain't! You're just a hack! All that pretend virtue, it's enough to make me sick!" he took a step forward. He paused as his knee buckled, but he remained standing. "You think I'm a hypocrite. But the truth is, the only real hypocrite here is you."
"Shut up," Izuku tensed his muscles. The hard and jagged edge of a rock he picked off the ground cut into his palm. "Don't pretend like you know anything about me. I'm just doing what's necessary."
"Oh yeah?" Muscular removed the hand from his head. The chasm of his empty socked gaped raw and meaty as it was unveiled for the world to see. Izuku stared at it. Could hardly look away. His breath hitched. "Is it necessary for you to enjoy it too?"
The stone sailed through the air, almost breaking apart from the force of Izuku's quirk. It sliced an arc through the sky with hissing turbulence, before plunging into its target. Muscular didn't scream this time. His other eye was decimated as soon as the rock touched it, and it exploded with clear fluid splashing over the man's skin and the space in front of him. He fell onto his back with a heavy thump.
"Fuck…" he rasped, quiet as a breath. His anger from earlier must have scurried off somewhere, and it put Izuku on edge more than anything else. "Guess… you're strong after all, huh? Damn… I'll give you credit for that. You're a fighter. A sneaky, slippery pest, but… you beat me fair and square," he tried to sit up, but fell back unceremoniously after less than a second of trying. He hissed as his broken fingers dragged across the uneven ground. His face was painted red from the two yawning holes in his head. "Motherfucker… when I recover from this and run into you again… I'll kill you for sure. I'll definitely… kill you..."
He coughed wetly, before falling silent. Izuku watched the man's torso slowly raise and lower as he inhaled and exhaled with tired, wheezing breaths. His body had returned to its normal form, and he looked unusually pale in the silver spotlight of the moon. Soft steps pattered up next to Izuku, and the teen glanced to its source.
"Is it over?" Kota whispered, tugging on Izuku's sore wrist. He sidled up behind Izuku's back and peeked out at the marred villain, lips trembling.
Izuku looked to Muscular. He was far from a pretty sight. The teen felt a pang of remorse. Kota was far too young to see something like this. "I don't think he'll be getting up any time soon," he confirmed, looping his arm around Kota and pulling him against his torso in a half-embrace. He muttered under his breath, "He better not after all the problems he caused… or I won't be so soft."
"What do we do now?"
Kota stared up at Izuku with askance. The student hummed in consideration.
"I should get you to a pro. They can do a better job at keeping you safe than I can," Izuku released Kota and crouched down in front of him. "Hop on my back. We can travel faster this way."
Izuku formed his arms into loops for Kota to thread his legs through. The kid jumped up and crossed his arms over the other's neck for support. "You better not drop me," he grumbled, tightening his hold as far as he could without strangling his ride.
Once Kota was settled, Izuku ran. He set his destination for the lodge, figuring he should at least be able to find one teacher there. His muscles smarted from strain and littered bruises, and the child clinging to him didn't help as he unintentionally pressed into Izuku's sore spots. Still, it was a minor enough discomfort that ignoring it was easy, especially with the residue adrenaline still pumping through his veins.
He zig-zagged through the brush, keeping an eagle eyed vision out for any movement. His dry eyes made him wish he had a pair of goggles like Aizawa. He reminded himself to ask support for that addition to his costume when he had the chance.
"Deku!" Kota yelled in his ear, pointing a short finger to a spot of darkness. "O-over there!"
Izuku rested on his heels and dug them into the soil, sending up a small dust of cloud behind him as the friction broke his advance. He pulled to a full stop with a small tumble, following Kota's direction with a sinking feeling.
"I-is that…?" Kota hugged his back closer. The boy didn't dare finish the sentence and could only stare wide eyed at the two charcoal forms burned into the ground. His expression wilted and he sobbed. "This can't be happening… none of this is happening…"
Izuku's legs felt weak and he had to slip Kota down his back before he made them both fall over. Once the kids feet hit the ground, Izuku ran up to the blackened shapes, praying to God that Kota was right.
He kneeled down in the dirt, swathing his knees with a layer of soot. He held out a hand, cupping it over one of the coal silhouettes. The dry material crumbled at the touch, and his stomach churned. The bodies were completely unrecognizable, burnt so badly he could only discern the vague shapes of something that used to be human.
When did this happen? Izuku swallowed down a gag. Can I still stop it?
"Deku! Watch out!"
Izuku didn't have time to act before he was screaming. Every inch of his skin blared with anguish and he collapsed onto his stomach. Bright blue light filled his vision, turning him blind. He tried to close his eyes, but his eyelids were melted into his skull. He had no choice but to keep looking, and through the azure flames, he could make out the growing hazy shape of someone tall and lean.
One arm was stretched out in Izuku's direction. The villain spoke.
"For a bunch of heroes to be, you don't put up much of a fight, do you?"
Izuku opened his mouth. He wanted to scream at the man, curse him to hell and back, but the only thing that escaped his barren throat was a raspy whine. He tried to stand, do anything, but his muscles refused to cooperate. His nose brimmed with the smell of burnt flesh and fabric. He would have thrown up if he could.
The man was right in front of him now. Izuku's vision was blurry, and he could only make out splotches of washed out color. He raked his eyes from the villain's boots to his indistinguishable face. He memorized it all.
Fire fuck.
Notes:
This chapter has a lot of dark humor. Well, I guess a lot of this story does. Things are already depressing enough as is so I like to lighten it up somewhat, haha.
RIP Muscular. Death by angry broccoli.
Chapter 38: Cremation
Notes:
Sorry for the long wait... again. In my defense, I've had some pretty busy days. Also, my motivation to write died. But then I started to read Worm (or I should say, I have been reading Worm, took a long break, and then picked it up again) and it made me want to write more dark superhero stuff again. Speaking of, if you like superheroes, and you like dark stories, read Worm. It's free. It will only steal your time.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck."
Izuku pulled his hand back. He looked to the cliff wall, then back to Kota. His eyes widened, and he sucked in a breath. Back here again? Shit… this is just great. He placed his hands on the boy's shoulders and pushed him back. Fuck. Fucking fucking fuck fuck.
"H-hey, what gives—?"
"Just…" Izuku heaved Kota up by the armpits, before putting him down again, adjusting him slightly as he manhandled him into position. "Great. That should be just perfect. Now, just stand there and don't move a muscle."
"Wha—"
Izuku pressed his fingers up to Kota's lips. "Not. A muscle," he repeated. He stepped back, and then he continued to walk backwards, studying the stony wall beside him for familiar patterns. Eventually, he stopped. He looked back to Kota. Just where he left him. He relaxed.
Ready.
"Now, Kota," he spoke, trying for a smile. It came off crooked. "Whatever happens next, don't freak out."
"What does that even mean…?"
When the wall broke asunder, Kota screamed, but Izuku was already in position. Quick as Muscular's reflexes may be, the dust created by his entrance obscured his vision, and he had no way to prepare for the boy who already knew the future. Frankly, he only had himself to blame for what happened next.
Izuku's placement wasn't perfect, but it was good enough. Taking a step in front of Muscular to grab his hands and push them back was easy. The velocity of Muscular's body moving forward did most of the work. Izuku only really needed One for All to brace his own flesh to keep it from tearing itself apart from the force.
He counted the snaps, one, two, all the way up to ten and a few more. He let go, moving his fingers to points and pushing them into the soft tissue of Muscular's one remaining eye and the hard metal that gouged scratches into his skin.
The man screamed, an automatic response to the unexpected assault of pain. Izuku saw his opportunity and took it. He knocked his knuckles into Muscular's dentist grin, savoring the sound made as the teeth shattered on impact. Blood and bits of sharp enamel scattered in the air, some of it burying itself into Izuku's hand, some into his face and eyelids as he closed them to protect the more sensitive tissue underneath.
He spat in disgust when a few bits got into his mouth and pulled his fist back. For good measure, or maybe as a final fuck you, he grabbed one of Muscular's ridicilously buldging shoulders, before bringing his knee up and dirving it as hard as he could into the villain's crotch. He didn't have time to be merciful, and he didn't much feel like it anyway.
Muscular wheezed, dropping to the ground like a forgotten toy. Izuku backed up, breathing heavily.
Fuck fuck fuck.
He shook out his wrists. He turned to Kota. The boy was covered in sand and dust, with bits of debris scattered by his feet. None had gone far enough to hit him, and Izuku grinned in self satisfied victory. Kota was fine. He was okay. Izuku's calculations had been perfect.
Izuku took a step toward the boy. Kota squeaked and retreated, falling on his behind. His eyes were like dinner plates, staring at the scene in front of him.
"What… what the hell was that? What just happened? What did you do?"
Izuku refrained from commenting on the child's word voice. The kid earned himself a bit of swearing.
"Villain," he explained simply. He looked down at Muscular, body stretched out and hardly moving, aside from the occasional twitch. Blood flowed from his head, and soon it would run down the side of the cliff like a fucked up waterfall. He moved his feet back as the viscous liquid closed in on him. "I heard him coming. Now, come on. There's more out there. We need to get you to safety and deal with them."
The lie came easily. He already figured Kota would demand an explanation from him, and this way they both left happy. He didn't feel guilty.
"Uuh.." the noise left Kota unbidden. A whine or a whimper, muffled as its owner did his best to suppress it. His fists balled at his sides and his lips trembled, pressed together so tight they turned white. He blinked rapidly, tried his hardest to keep the tears inside and failed. He sniffed. Izuku walked up to him, lowering himself to one knee.
"Come on," he urged. He tried to put his hand on Kota's shoulder to rub it comfortingly, but stopped half way when he watched Kota flinch. He put his hand on his knee. "We need to leave. Now."
Kota didn't say anything at first. His eyes were despondent, staring into nothing. Izuku snapped his fingers over his nose and he blinked back to attention.
"Come on," Izuku repeated. He didn't want to get snappy with the kid, but they needed to hurry. He had no clue how much time they had to waste. "Let's go."
He turned around, presenting his back for a piggy back ride, just like last time. He glanced back at Kota, hardening his gaze until the young boy stood up on wobbly knees and climbed into position. His face was red and sticky with snot, sniffling occasionally, but otherwise stayed eerily silent. His arms felt loose around Izuku's neck, and the older boy pulled at them gingerly.
"Hold on tight. Don't fall off."
Kota's grip tightened as Izuku stood up. He looked to the cliff's edge. Should he risk it? He felt Kota's forehead touch the hem of his t-shirt's neck and pressed his teeth together. Turning around, he used One for All to dig his feet and fingers into the rock and began to climb down. It wasn't as fast as jumping, but it was safer, and still faster than taking the mountain path he used to get up here.
With two to three meters left to the ground, he dropped, bending his knees in time with the fall to mitigate damage. He turned, and after making sure Kota's arms were still secure, ran.
He took the same path vaguely memorized from last time. It was hard to tell the trees apart as they all looked the same, and he didn't pay much attention the first time. Still, he had a general idea, going more on feeling than sight, trusting that his instincts would come through for him.
Please be fast enough, he pleaded for any who would listen. Please please please.
He saw a pale shape shift in the darkness, and leapt right toward it.
"Hey—"
The voice was abruptly cut off as Izuku stumbled into them face first. The stranger yelped, falling onto their back as Izuku smacked his face into their torso.
"Honenuki! Are you alright?"
Honenuki wheezed through compressed lungs, pushing on Izuku to free himself.
"Y-yeah, I'm fine," he hacked. He opened his eyes, white and wide as they focused on Izuku. The stranger blinked. His hair was a shaggy blonde, but Izuku was more distracted by the set of gigantic teeth that took up half his face. "Where'd you come from?"
"No time to talk," Izuku said. He jumped off the 1-B student, pulling the other teen to his feet as he did. Honenuki let out a noise of surprise, shifting his legs to balance himself. "A villain will be here soon. His quirk is fire, so be ready."
"What? Hey!" a girl Izuku didn't know the name of ran up to the trio. Her hair was green, reaching just a bit past her shoulders, with sharp eyes that shifted between them, clearly perturbed and slightly annoyed. She tapped her foot on the ground, eyeing Izuku from toe to tip. "What's going on here? What's this about a villain? Were you chased? What's with the kid? Isn't that Mandalay's nephew?"
"Look," Izuku put Kota down. He clasped his wrists in his hands tightly. If he pressed hard enough, he could stop them from shaking. "I can answer your questions later, but now's really not the time. Just trust me on this. A villain's going to be here soon, and if we all want to get out of this alive, we need to work together to take him down."
"You wanna fight? Really?" Honenuki appeared skeptical. He eyed Kota warily. "If a villain's chasing you like you said, wouldn't it be better to run?"
"No."
There must've been something in the tone of his voice, because both class B students winced. His fingers tightened their grip over his skin. It burned. The girl was the first to recover, and he could already see the protest ready on her lips. He elaborated.
"If we run, this guy's just going to go after someone else. Are you okay with that? Could you live with yourself if someone got hurt because you ran away?"
The girl and Honenuki exchanged a glance. They appeared hesitant, and for good reason. Izuku had seen first hand what happened if these two were left to fight the villain on their own. Maybe telling them to run was the right choice. He could tell them to take Kota with them and leave Izuku to face the villain alone.
But what if they ran into more trouble on their way to safety? What if they weren't strong enough to protect Kota or themselves and they all got killed? What if Izuku only found out when it was already too late?
There was too much risk involved. He made a promise to keep Kota safe, and he intended to keep it.
"Well… when you put it like that…" the girl scratched her cheek. Wide curls bounced over her shoulders with the motion. She looked less than thrilled, but that was fine. This wasn't a time for pleasantries.
"Great," Izuku nodded. "Tell me your quirks so I've got an idea of what to work with. Mine's enhanced strength and speed, well, mostly. I don't know much about the villain, other than he can control fire somehow, and it's really fucking hot. So, if you've got something against that, that'd be great."
"I can soften anything I touch, so long it isn't alive. Don't think it'd be much help against fire though," Honenuki piped up. "Name's Honenuki, by the way. You're… Mido-something, right?"
"Midora!" the girl exclaimed, grinning brightly.
"Midoriya," Izuku corrected. She pouted, and he almost felt bad. The expression was quickly wiped away as she introduced herself.
"Tokage Setsuna. I can split my body into parts like a lizard, and I'm free to move them around in the air as I'd like! Pretty nifty, huh?"
"Huh," Izuku's brows raised. That opened up a lot of questions. Too bad he didn't have time to ask them all. "You're right. That is pretty nifty."
She grinned.
"Hey… what about me?" Honenuki pointed a finger to himself. "My quirk is cool too, right?"
"Both of your quirks are strong," Izuku reassured. His head already spun with ideas and implications. "Hm… neither's very useful against fire though. Maybe if we could catch him off guard then… ah."
"Yeah?" Tokage cocked her head. "You've got an idea?"
"Maybe. Not a plan really, but…" Izuku looked at Honenuki. He eyed him up carefully. "When you say 'soft'... how soft are we talking exactly?"
This time, Izuku was ready.
He motioned his arm in an arc, moving air and earth alike forward in a rippling wave. The blue fire's path across the ground was halted, thrown into disarray and died before it reached him. The air was left heavy and hot in the aftermath, and Izuku's lungs felt heavy as he breathed deep to pull in enough oxygen to keep his head from swimming.
"Hm. Nice quirk you've got, kid. Nice reflexes too. Any slower and you'd be toast by now. Literally."
Izuku's tongue tasted salty from the sweat dripping down his lips. "Yeah? You've turned anyone into toast yet?"
The villain made a sound. Azure flames parted around him like Moses as he stepped through the thicket of trees, revealing a tall figure who looked more like a raggedy old scarecrow than a person. He had more scars than skin, with thick threads stitching the patchy skin together. Izuku wondered if it was to keep his flesh from bursting free, or if it was just some fucked up fashion statement.
"Mm. Dunno. This forest is burning pretty nicely, don't you think? Probably killed a few of your friends already. Then again, I guess you hero wannabes are a bit tougher than your average brat."
It wasn't a definite no, but it wasn't a yes either. It was the best answer he could hope for, given the circumstances.
"I see. Anyway, how about we skip the witty banter and move straight to the part where you try to kill me and I inevitably defeat you with the power of believing in myself? I really don't want this to drag out any longer than it has to."
The scarred man's face was unreadable. He blinked slowly, then, without uttering a single noise, he raised his arm and jerked his fingers. A pillar of heat exploded in Izuku's direction, and he threw himself to the side in pure reflex. The fire moved past him, before bending and coming for his back. Izuku opened his mouth, throwing out a curse.
Shit! This guy can't just create fire, he can control it too?!
Izuku sliced his hand through the air, throwing a burst of wind that pushed the flames off course. They didn't make a second move for him, instead fading off into nothing once it ran out of material on the ground to burn.
The man raised his arm again. His pupils turned to pricks as they focused on Izuku. His expression was still just as unreadable as stone.
"Hey, ugly! Over here!"
The man spun on the spot. A tidal wave of fire followed the pendulum motion of his hand, moving for the trees.
"Don't!"
With another surge of One for All, Izuku punched a hook in the air that forced Mr. Fire Fuck lumbering to the side, along with his flames. They licked against his dark coat, before quickly dying.
He's not immune to fire.
Izuku jumped.
If he can't stand his own flames, he'll be powerless in close quarter combat.
Or so he hoped. In either case, he was about to find out soon.
He latched onto the tall villain's back, pushing him down to the ground. He grabbed one of the black coat sleeves, turning the enemy over. One hand pressed down on the man's chest, the other raised to smash his face in and add to his impressive collection of scars.
Their eyes met. Izuku felt something brush against his stomach, and the man grinned. Immediately, Izuku pushed against the ground and jumped off the villain. A scarred hand rested where his gut was just seconds ago, small embers floating over the palm like glitter.
"Bummer. And I was just about to turn you to coal from the inside out."
I see. He could have burned me to a crisp in less than a second without taking any, or at least not much, damage to himself.
No close combat then. This guy was really turning into a nuisance.
He's been using his hands to direct his flames this whole time. Is that a requirement of his quirk or just for style? No, he wouldn't want to signal his moves unless it was necessary… or he's arrogant enough to think he can win either way.
Izuku didn't have much choice but to assume the former. If he was wrong, he'd just have to try again.
In the time Izuku spent mulling over his options, the villain returned to his feet. One hand was in his coat's pocket, the other raised, palm up, a cruel sneer on his ruined face. He looked the image of unflappable malice. The man eyed his left, then his right, but Izuku wasn't foolish enough to think he was distracted enough for Izuku to sneak a hit in.
His opponent hummed. "Two little heroes against one villain… isn't that unfair?" his head shifted, fingers twitching. "Question is: who do I kill first? You? Or whoever is hiding there in those trees?"
"I thought I made it clear I don't care for your banter. Are you trying to waste my time?"
The villain's lips twitched. "Ha… sassy. Guys like you really annoy me."
Izuku think this may be what they call a Mexican standoff. Both sides were hesitant to act, anticipating their opponents next move. One good flick from Izuku's finger would be enough to take the man down, but he'd seen how the villain handled his flames. He could set them off faster than Izuku could use One for All. What Izuku needed was a distraction.
He glanced into the branches and leaves over his head.
"To your left!"
The villain turned to the right. An oblong shape sped toward him, and he raised a mottled purple hand and fired. It turned to ash before it touched him. He opened his mouth to say something, but was beaten to the punch.
"I said your left! Should have listened!"
Two floating hands latched to the man's wrists from behind him. A girl's voice cackled, tugging on the tall villain, trying to move him. He dug his heels into the ground and tried to shake the offending hands off with little luck.
Izuku saw his opening and pointed his fingers.
"Nice work!" he called out, before flicking his index finger over his thumb.
His opponent didn't have time to send out a new wave of flames before his feet left the ground and his body flung through the air by the gale Izuku created. Tokage was still holding onto him, and she maneuvered the villain until his stomach was perpendicular with the ground.
She pulled down, and her hands disappeared into the earth. The man followed, until he was sunk wrist deep into the softened ground. His knees scraped over the dirt where the ground was still hard, gaining traction as he tried to pull himself free.
"Honenuki! Help me pin him down!" the girl cried out. Two bodies jumped out of the pool of softened ground, one small, one large, the smaller clinging to the taller shape.
"On it!"
Kota let go as soon as he was free, landing on a patch of grass while the large toothed student pushed on the villain's back to keep his arms buried in the ground. From this angle, it was impossible for the man to overpower the body keeping him down. His brows drew together and Izuku saw his shoulders shrug. The man frowned, and Izuku couldn't help the small smile that played across his face.
"Guess you can't use your flames with your hands stuck in the ground, can you?" it was phrased like a question, but it was more rhetorical than genuine. Izuku was sure that if the man could do something, he would have done so already. "Guess you lose."
He walked up to Honenuki. The other boy's face was twisted in a look of hard concentration, despite the villain's struggles showing little progress. Tokage's headless and handless body climbed out of the pool, joining them. Her head emerged from the brush, floating and attaching itself to her neck. Her hands followed shortly after. She shrugged her shoulders, making a dull cracking sound. She sighed, satisfied.
"I say that was some pretty neat teamwork, huh? So, Midora. What do we do now?" she poked her foot carefully into the villain's side. "I don't suppose you have any rope we can tie him up with?"
Izuku shook his head. "Even if I did, that's too risky. We can't give him a chance to break free."
"Yeah?" Honenuki was hesitant when he took his eyes off of the enemy to look at Izuku. "Then what are we supposed to do? Wait here until a teacher finds us?"
Izuku dropped to a crouch.
"I'm going to knock him out."
"That's dangerous!" Tokage protested. "What if you end up giving him brain damage? If it happens in the midst of a fight, that's one thing, but this is premeditated—"
"Like I said: I'm not taking any chances here. We'll knock him out, take him with us. Drop him off with a pro and let them handle the rest. If anything bad happens, I'll take full responsibility. So don't worry about it, okay?"
The class B students exchanged a look. Reluctantly, they nodded.
"Alright…" Tokage conceded. "Just be careful. Don't crack his skull open or anything."
The villain for his part stayed silent. Maybe eerily so. Was he thinking up countermeasures? Did he already have a plan in place? He seemed awfully calm.
Izuku shook his head. Nevermind. He couldn't afford to hesitate. Maybe the man just had enough grace to accept when he was defeated.
Izuku raised his fist.
The villain looked at him. His eyes were just as blue as his flames.
"Ah," his mouth formed an O. "I know you."
Izuku punched.
There was a splattering noise and a pungent odour filled his nostrils. He sputtered, drawing his palm down his face to clear it from the sticky substance.
"H-hey! What did you do?!"
That was Honenuki's voice. Izuku blinked dark spots out of his eyes, clearing his blurry vision. He looked down at the ground where the villain's body was just moments ago. Only a strange dark goo was left behind.
"I don't know," he admitted. He gathered a mound of dirt mixed with the strange liquid. He shifted it in his palm as he considered it. A fearful thought started to take form. He held back curse. "I don't think that was the real villain."
"What do you mean?" Tokage stared at the empty spot, just as lost for words as the rest of them. She chewed on her lip, fidgeting with her hands. The left one was still floating in the air, the part it would usually attach to missing, leaving the girl with only half an arm.
"I don't know, but this means he's probably still out there. If I had to guess, this was just… a clone, or some type of body double," he looked at the girl's half formed arm. "...are you alright?"
"Huh?" Tokage looked down to her floating fist, as if she'd somehow forgotten about it. "Oh! Don't worry about that. Give it some time and my arm will regrow. Doesn't even hurt or anything. Kinda itches, though," she smiled, like a big sister trying to reassure her younger brother. Izuku didn't have any siblings, but he was sure it must be something like this.
"So he's not dead," Honenuki looked relieved, but not enough to override his anxiety. "I was scared for a second… I'm not ready to have that on my record."
He laughed. It was shrill, and a little too chipper. Painfully fake.
"Come on," Izuku urged. "We should head back to the lodge. I'm sure a teacher will be there. They'll know what to do."
"Good idea," Tokage nodded. She looked over at Kota. With a wave of her hand, she motioned him over. "Come on, kid. Let's go find your aunt."
Kota was mute, only nodding numbly before running up to the girl. Maybe it was just his imagination, but when Izuku tried to meet Kota's gaze, he found himself ignored. It made him frown, but he decided to dismiss it for now. There were bigger properties to deal with first.
"Know the way?" Honenuki slapped Izuku on the back. Maybe he was smiling but it was hard to tell when his head was more teeth than face.
Izuku nodded. He pointed. "That way."
He didn't need to say anything else before they were moving.
"Aizawa! Thank God!"
The teacher looked surprised to see them, but unmistakably relieved.
"Midoriya," his voice was monotone as always, but his shoulders slumped at their approach. "You didn't go and break your bones again. I'm surprised."
"Ahaha," Izuku ran his hand through his curls awkwardly. "Y-yeah… I got lucky. Um, anyways, I was thinking…"
"Stop," Aizawa glared at him. "I already know what you're going to say, and no, I won't let you put yourself in more danger than you already have."
"But—"
"No buts. You four are heading back to the lodge where Vlad will look after you. Don't leave to go fight villains on your own. This is something you leave to the pros."
Izuku ruminated for a moment. "No. I'm sorry Aizawa, but I can't agree to that."
Aizawa opened his mouth, likely to admonish him. Izuku gestured at Kota and the two class-B students behind him, pressing on.
"These three will head to Vlad, but I'm coming with you. I've already beat one of the villains, and we sorta beat another. Except it wasn't really him, but some clone or something—nevermind, I can explain later. Point is, I won't be a liability, and I won't take no for an answer. I am going to fight, and I can promise you this: I won't die."
Izuku had thought this through long and hard all the way to the lodge. He didn't like Kota leaving his sight, but he knew pulling the kid along into the thick of the villains was just asking for trouble. The lodge, protected by a pro and whoever of his classmates where there, was the safest place to be.
Aizawa took a long breath. "Problem child…" he muttered. "...no. I can't accept that. I know you're stubborn, but no matter how stubborn you are, some things are just impossible. I'm a pro hero, but first and foremost, I am your teacher. My job is to care for and cultivate you, not send you head first into hopeless danger. You're going back to the lodge, and that's final."
Izuku shifted his legs. He turned his head to look into the Beast's Forest. Fire and smoke licked at the trees, and in the distance, you could hear the cries and clashes of battle.
"Like I told you, Aizawa," he spoke, enunciating the words carefully. "I won't be taking no for an answer. Sorry."
Before Aizawa could activate his quirk, Izuku dug his soles into the ground. A cloud of dust kicked up behind him as he activated One for All and dashed to where the noise was loudest.
"Midoriya!" Aizawa coughed. Izuku heard him draw in a phlegm and spat it out on the ground. "Don't you dare! Come back here!"
Izuku hoped Aizawa would forgive him. He really hoped this wouldn't end up getting him suspended.
Don't think a reset can fix that, he thought with a grimace.
Notes:
Class B superiority. #MonomaDidNothingWrong
Izuku is doing a speedrun on how to give his teachers heart attacks.
Also, full disclosure. In canon when Deku and Muscular fight, Deku finds out that the villains are looking for Bakugou. Deku doesn't know that here, and no, that's not because I planned it that way. I just forgot, haha. Don't think it would have flowed well with the dialogue anyway, so. Guess we're doing it this way now.
How you're enjoying the new season of Re:Zero anyway? I'm glad we're back to the Subaru suffering. Fantastic. Just wished there was less shitty looking CGI.
Chapter 39: By Tooth and Claw
Summary:
"I'm tired of all these goddamn villains."
Notes:
Izuku and the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The sound of battle was almost drowned out by the wind in his ears. He arrived in an open area in the woods and saw Tiger and Mandalay engaged with two villains Izuku didn't recognize. One had a body completely covered in green scales, wielding a very inconvenient looking weapon that could maybe be called a sword, if one was generous. Izuku thinks he remembers Muscular mentioning something about this one, the "ninja turtle wannabe", as he put it. The other was a tall and imposing figure, with a broad psyche similar to Tiger's.
Would be nice if Muscular told me anything about their quirks, Izuku thought, before launching a kick through the so-called sword and scattering it in a hundred blades that exploded over the battlefield.
"Kid!" Mandalay cried out at his approach. "What are you doing here?! Where's Kota?!"
"He's safe, back with Vlad King!" Izuku replied without missing a beat, skidding over the dirt to halt by the two heroes. Looking down, he saw Pixie-Bob lying unconscious on the ground, and he grit his teeth. He looked from Tiger to Mandalay. "Is she alive?"
"She'll be fine," Tiger reassured, getting himself ready in a battle stance. "You should get out of here, kiddo. This is no fight for children."
Izuku shook his head. "No. I'm staying."
"Midoriya—"
"I'm staying," Izuku cut Mandalay's protests off. "I can help. Now, tell me what these villains can do."
Someone clicked their tongue. "What a troublesome kid," the large villain spoke. "What kind of teachers can't even handle their own students?"
"Big sis Magne, wait!" the green one swung his arm out, not looking too cut up about the loss of his sword-amalgamation. "This is the kid Stain approved of! We shouldn't fight him!"
"You mean the one Shigaraki wants dead?" Magne leered, showing her crooked teeth off. "How lucky of us, to be the ones to run into him. Shigaraki will be a happy man when we bring this kid in."
I'm still here, you know, Izuku wanted to say. Instead, he stayed silent, grabbing one of the scattered knives that belonged to the green villain. He threw it in the big one's direction, but she was quick enough to dodge it with a huff of breath. Didn't help that Izuku's aim was only sub-par, though One for All helped in sending the weapon flying in a straight line.
"You sure don't waste any time," she said. She glared at her partner. "Hey, Spinner, why don't you distract these guys long enough so I can get my thing back?"
"But—" Spinner was cut off with a yelp as another knife launched in his direction. It split a shallow cut over his scaly cheek. "Hey, no fair! You can't turn my own weapons against me!"
"Says who? The Geneva Convention?" Izuku held a dagger in each hand, jumping for the villain. Spinner rolled out of the way with another noise of surprise. "Stain?"
"Says I!" Spinner lay on the ground and took a page out of Izuku's book, throwing a blade towards the other. It was clear his aim was a lot better than Izuku's, though Izuku's reflexes were fast enough that he could knock the weapon out of the air with one of his stolen daggers. Spinner picked up as many blades as he could reach, throwing them one after the other at Izuku. "This isn't very heroic, you know!"
"I don't care," Izuku snarled through clenched teeth, running in a line to avoid the flying knives.
"I can't say I approve of this," Tiger called out, just as he threw himself at Spinner. He kicked the other back with a heel in the green man's stomach. "But things are too tense to argue between each other. Just promise that you'll leave as soon as things get too dangerous for you!"
"Fine," Izuku replied without zest. Tiger was right that this wasn't the time to argue.
"We'll definitely talk about this later, kitty cat," Mandalay's voice echoed inside his head. "For now, watch the big one."
In the commotion, the 'big one' had managed to get her hands on what appeared to be a long cylinder wrapped up in a dirty piece of cloth. She shifted it over her shoulder and pointed it towards Izuku. She grinned, and Izuku felt his feet lift off the ground as he was sent sailing head first toward the villain. Izuku was still holding the daggers in his hands, and threw one towards her. Magne shifted her head and the weapon missed her completely, sticking to the cloth of the cylinder. It didn't fall.
A magnet, Izuku deduced. He held up the other knife in front of his nose, ready to slash once he got close enough.
Mandalay charged the villain, the claws of her costume raised and ready. Magne saw her approach and cocked her head slightly in the heroine's direction. She shifted the weight over her shoulders, and thrusted the magnet in Izuku's direction. It punched into his stomach, and Izuku tightened his muscles to dampen the blow. It hurt, but the worst it would leave was a bruise.
An invisible force tugged at his limbs, throwing them up in the air and stretched out to his left. Mandalay made a high pitched noise as she was pulled in his direction. The magnet Magne drove into his stomach held Izuku in place, while the knife in his hand pointed at Mandalay's face. He immediately dropped it, except it didn't fall to the ground as expected, sticking to the skin of his palm like it'd been glued there. He tried shaking it off, to no avail. He activated One for All and crumpled it like an empty can of soda, just before Mandalay smacked nose first into his clenched fist.
The magnetic aura around her disappeared, and she dropped to the ground, clutching her nose. Magne grinned down at her handiwork, and Izuku took the momentary distraction to kick the villain in the stomach. She grunted, and Izuku fell. He distanced himself from the villain, bringing the pro-heroine with him.
"Damn… I should have realized approaching that villain with you already there was a bad idea. With a quirk like that, it's safest to fight her one on one," Mandalay spoke nasally, clutching her bloodied nose.
"What's her quirk? Some form of magnetism?" Izuku asked.
"Yeah. I still haven't figured it out completely, but from what I saw, she was able to magnetize us both and have us attract each other. But I think there's a certain range to her power, or we'd already be flying towards her again."
"You big brute!" Spinner shouted from his side of the battlefield. Tiger had him clutched by his collar, and he was swinging a knife wildly through the air. Tiger had his arm stretched out, keeping the villain at a safe distance. Spinner threw the knife, and the hero dodged it by a tilt of his head. "Lemme go, dammit!"
"Hm," Magne made a noise, watching her partner struggle. She clutched the magnet in both hands, looking to something on the ground. Before Izuku realized what had got her attention, she moved. Pixie-Bob's unconscious body floated up, attaching itself to the magnet.
"Crap!" Mandalay showed off her teeth, claws trembling at her sides. Magne deactivated her quirk, holding Pixie-Bob by the back of her shirt.
"Let's see now… what do I wanna do with you?" she shook the pro, like a baby shaking a rattle. "Do I kill her now? Or keep her as a hostage long enough until you've been dealt with?"
"You hear that?!" Spinner pointed a finger at Tiger. "You better let me go now if you even care a little bit about your friend!"
Tiger growled. Veins stood out against the back of his hand as he pulled Spinner's collar taut.
The gears in Izuku's head were spinning as he considered forms of approach. He couldn't throw any knives, as Magne was likely to magnetize Pixie-Bob and turn Izuku's attack against him. He could throw himself at the villain, but he didn't know how Magne would use her quirk to counter him.
He eyed the magnet in the large woman's hand. The knife he threw earlier was still attached to it. If he had to make a guess, Magne's magnetism only extended to people. She couldn't magnetize objects. The cylinder she carried was just a normal magnet, albeit unusually strong.
Deciding to take the chance, he jumped at Magne. He was confident that Magne wouldn't hurt Pixie-Bob so long she figured she could still use the hero as a hostage. Even with Izuku moving towards her, she would leave Pixie-Bob alone until the very last moment. He had to act quickly.
"Dammit, Midoriya! Don't!"
Mandalay shouted after him as Magne activated her quirk. Izuku felt his momentum increase, but it didn't matter. She thrust the magnet out to punch him with it like earlier, but Izuku pushed his arms out in front of him and twined them around the magnet. He had to use One for All to have enough power to climb along the surface, feeling like an ocean was bearing down on him. He took a hold of the knife still attached to the magnet, stabbing it in Magne's direction. She reeled back, but Izuku followed her movements and cut a long line over her face from forehead to chin.
She dropped Pixie-Bob and the magnet. Izuku was free from the force of her quirk, and quickly kicked the magnet off into the distance. It crashed into a tree, breaking the trunk in two. He grabbed Pixie-Bob and returned her to Mandalay. The heroine pulled her friend closer, checking the woman for any new injuries.
"That was a really risky move," she chastised him, but she looked relieved. "Don't do something so reckless again."
"I'll try not to," Izuku replied, which was mostly true. He'd like to avoid any risky maneuvers if he could, but with no safer alternatives, he wouldn't hesitate.
"Ack!" Spinner choked as Tiger beared down on him. "Big sis, you okay?!"
"'m fine," Magne muttered. She wiped her arm over her face, sneering down at the curtain of blood that stuck to her forearm. "Crazy kid. I'll make you pay for messing my face up."
Izuku was about to reply, either with some clever retort or just a regular insult. Your face's already ugly enough as it is. If anything, I did you a favor. But his train of thought was derailed by a loud howl, catching them all off guard.
The noise was somehow both a keening wail and a low rumbling roar at the same time. His eardrums vibrated along with the air, leaving a ringing sound behind even after the voice fell quiet. It didn't take long before they heard another scream, along with cracks of breaking wood and a thundering of destruction.
Izuku turned his head, and what he saw caused the breath to hitch in his throat. A massive dark mass stretched up towards the moon, pulling trees out by the roots and flinging boulders left and right with no care where they landed.
Is that… Tokoyami? Izuku felt cold as he watched what must be an out of control Dark Shadow tearing through the Beast's Forest like a human stomping through an ant hill.
"What in God's name is that?!" Mandalay exclaimed. The fighting between villains and heroes temporarily seized as everyone was stuck watching the monster level the forest with ease.
"Hey, Magne, this isn't one of our guys, is it?" Spinner asked, staring slack jawed at what was happening. Magne didn't answer, just as distracted as the rest of them.
"Fuck," Izuku swore, the first to pull himself out of the reverie. He repeated the curse, for good measure. "Fuck!"
"Midoriya?" Mandalay looked at him, concerned. "You know what's going on?"
"It's Tokoyami. Must be," he replied, not even looking at her. He heard her inhale sharply. "All this fighting must have caused his quirk to go wild."
"Fuck," the pro repeated his sentiment. "This is a worst case scenario. I'll have to send Aizawa, he can calm your friend down."
"Maybe," Izuku spoke through his teeth. "That's assuming he's not already stuck fighting some villain. Mandalay—"
"No, I'm not sending you off to—"
"I have to!" Izuku finally looked at her, throwing his arms out on both sides in an open gesture. "Tokoyami is my friend. I have to help him before he does something he'll regret."
"Dammit kid," Mandalay shook her head. "Don't look at me like that. How am I supposed to argue against you like that?"
"I'll stay safe," Izuku promised. "Just promise you'll do the same."
"Don't worry about us. I think we've got a handle on these guys, now. Just… you better not make me regret this, or I'll never be able to catch a wink of sleep again."
"Mandalay," Tiger cut in. He still had Spinner in his grip, but the villain was too preoccupied watching Dark Shadow to struggle. "We can't let him—"
"I know," Mandalay's eyes hardened. "But do you honestly think we could hold him here and fight these villains at the same time?"
Tiger didn't answer. Just glared at Spinner. Spinner didn't react.
"I'm going to be fine," Izuku looked at both pros as he spoke. He cast a quick glance to Pixie-Bob, resting in Mandalay's arms. "I promise."
He didn't waste another minute, running off into the forest after the screaming Tokoyami. He heard the fighting pick back up behind him, and prayed the heroes would come out of it okay.
This is the worst, he thought. This is the absolute worst.
He dodged a tree flying in his direction, not letting it interrupt his rhythm as he got closer to his rampaging classmate. He was trying to think of ways to calm the other boy down, not wanting to rely on the feeble hope that Aizawa would show up just in time to put a stop to the fighting. He was going to need light, and a lot of it. He just didn't know how he was going to get it. If he knocked Tokoyami out, would that put a stop to his quirk? Or would Dark Shadow continue his rage, unaffected by his inert master? Even if he did knock the other out, he couldn't be sure he wouldn't do some irreparable damage to Tokoyami in the process.
Part of the forest the fire villain set ablaze was still caught in a raving inferno. If Izuku could lead Tokoyami in that direction, then maybe it would be enough to return his classmate to normal. It was the only semi-solid plan he had to work with, save for a miracle.
Izuku pulled to a stop. Tokoyami was less than a hundred meters away from him, and didn't appear to have noticed him yet. The crow-boy didn't appear entirely aware of his surroundings in general, ripping up trees at random and throwing them without aim. Izuku caught sight of a familiar shape on the ground, coated in red. His stomach dropped, and he ran up to it quickly.
"Shoji," he called out, half a whisper, half a shout. He didn't want to catch Dark Shadow's attention yet. Shoji didn't answer, and Izuku checked his pulse. It was slow, but there, and he was breathing. Alive, but just barely.
Izuku pinched his face to keep from crying in relief. He pulled out a strip of cloth from the bottom of his shirt, gingerly tying it like a bandana over the gash that split Shoji's hair apart to stem the bleeding, before standing. He'd like to bring the other to safety, but he needed to deal with Tokoyami, and he was afraid moving Shoji around without a proper assessment of his injuries could aggravate the wounds further.
He ran, making a quarter of a circle around Tokoyami. He wanted to ensure that when his out of control classmate caught sight of him, he would move away from Shoji. He climbed to the top of the nearest and tallest tree with a single jump, taking in the Beast's Forest from his new vantage point. He saw dark smoke in the distance, guiding him like a compass.
Course set, he turned to Tokoyami. He breathed in as much air as his lungs could hold, before shouting.
"HEY!" he bellowed. "OVER HERE!"
Dark Shadow caught sight of him immediately. He bent forward, and two clawed hands the same size as small cars dug into the earth. He pulled, leaping towards Izuku with a two toned screech. Izuku sucked in a breath, not expecting Tokoyami to be as fast as he was. He turned, jumping between tree tops to where he saw flames lick the sky.
"Just like that!" he called out behind him, throwing a One for All charged punch under his feet to push himself forward. Black claws swiped the air where he'd been just seconds before. "Just keep following me!"
Tokoyami's only answer was a ghastly howl. He ripped a tree from under Izuku's feet, and the freckled boy stumbled. He tucked himself into a ball, rolling over the ground. He pitched a rock into Dark Shadow's shoulder, but it hardly seemed to affect him. It shattered on impact.
"M-Midoriyaaaaa!" he wailed, and Izuku's heart jumped into his throat. Whatever semblance of sanity Izuku thought his classmate regained seemed to be for naught, as another pair of claws reached out for him. Izuku avoided them just in time, and Tokoyami groaned. "Shooojiiiii!"
Crystal liquid ran down his face. Tears. He was crying. One of Tokoyami's eyes met Izuku's, pleading. It only lasted for a second before his living shadow swallowed his head whole, leaving a luminous and bottomless white pit behind. His black beak opened, and he screamed. It drilled right into Izuku's core, almost freezing him to the spot.
"Soon!" he promised, mouth turning dry from all his shouting as he continued to run. "I'm going to fix you soon!"
Izuku was almost bisected when an ivory blade cut across his path. He ducked under it just in time, crashing into the ground and tearing his chin up in the process. He pushed himself up to his knees, scrambling to move before Dark Shadow pulverized him with his fist, or turned him into ribbons with his claws. He'd arrived in a glade, and his eyes followed the jagged line of white that almost forced him into a reset, avoiding another strike from Tokoyami at the same time.
"Are you kidding me?!" he proclaimed, catching sight of what must be another villain. He looked to be dressed in some type of fetish gear, clad in a black leather straight jacket and spider gag. A labyrinth of white lines connected to his teeth, stabbing into the ground and forming a sharp and deadly cage. It took Izuku another second before he realized those were his teeth, just incredibly stretched out and deformed. Disgusting.
Of course he was going to run into another villain when he already had enough to worry about on his plate. It seemed to be a running theme with him, ever since joining U.A.
"E-eat," the villain chattered, gnashing his teeth together as well he could. "Meat."
It was as far as he got before Tokoyami slapped him into the ground. His teeth shattered, and his head cracked against a rock. He didn't get up.
"Holy shit!"
Izuku recognized that voice. He whipped his head to the side, finding a familiar angry blonde. His red eyes gawked bug eyed at the downed villain.
"What the actual shit?" he continued, before noticing Izuku. "Deku? What the fuck?!"
"Kacchan," Izuku breathed. "I don't think I've ever been as happy to see you as I am now."
Bakugou uttered a sound of indignation. A small cliff of ice was behind him, and a frazzled looking Todoroki stepped out from behind it.
"What's going on?" he asked. Tokoyami had momentarily paused his attacks, appearing distracted by the deathly still villain. "Is that… Tokoyami?"
Izuku's shoulders went slack. He took a shuddering breath.
"Todoroki. I am so happy right now, you have no idea."
Todoroki didn't look convinced. His disinclination didn't last long however, as Tokoyami soon lost his interest in the tooth-villain and now eyed his classmates like a hawk watching its prey, which wasn't too far from the truth.
"Todoroki. Kacchan. I'm going to need you to create as much light as you possibly can. Now."
Bakugou opened his mouth, probably to tell Izuku to fuck off and not tell him what to do, when a sharp claw moved towards him. Izuku drove his elbow into his stomach at the same time Bakugou ignited his palms in the shadow's direction. Dark Shadow screeched in protest and they stumbled to the ground, leaving Bakugou sputtering.
"You fucking idiot!" he barked. "I fucking had him!"
"Todoroki," Izuku turned to his two-toned classmate. "Fire. Now."
The boy didn't need any further prompting, and he raised his left hand to unleash a tornado of fire that rose like a pillar over Tokoyami. The shadow shied away from the glow, pupil-less eyes seeking like a homing missile for the culprit behind it. They found Todoroki, charging him to cut off the source of his weakness.
"Kacchan!" Izuku demanded the blonde's attention. "More light!"
Thankfully, Bakugou listened for once, jumping after Tokoyami with burning fists.
"How'd you like this, birdbrain?!" he cackled, increasing the size of his explosions bit by bit as Dark Shadow reeled back, away from Todoroki. The explosions were at their peak, a glory of fire and power, before abruptly fizzling out. "Fuck."
The blonde shook out his arms and wiped a hand over his forehead to gather as much sweat as he could to replenish his ammunition. His palms crackled back to life, and he and Todoroki worked together to drive Dark Shadow back and slowly shrink him to a size where its user could regain control.
"Keep going!" Izuku called out over the cacophony of fire and explosions, feeling a little useless. He took a broken branch and used Todoroki's fire to light it up, waving it at Tokoyami. He wasn't sure it did anything, but it made him feel a little better. "Just a little more! Just keep. Holding. Out!"
Fat beads of sweat dripped down Todoroki's brow. He grit his teeth, keeping up the inferno without complaint, not able to afford the distraction.
"M-Midoriyaaaaa—" Tokoyami called out his name for the second time. His voice was returning to normal and he looked to be trying his hardest to fight back against his haywire quirk. His beak hung open in a silent cry, and Izuku gave him a reassuring smile.
"Almost there, Tokoyami," he said. "You're almost there."
He was there. And then he wasn't. Izuku blinked.
"What—"
"Whoops. Sorry, were you using that?"
A man balanced atop a tree branch. His face was obscured by a black and white mask, and he twirled something small and round between his fingers with practiced ease. A marble.
One for All exploded in Izuku before he even realized it, and he screamed. "What did you do?!"
"This must be my lucky day," the man continued, ignoring the boy's outburst. "Both targets right next to one another, and a little bonus to boot. Shigaraki will be overjoyed. Maybe I'll even see him smile, for once."
Izuku sprung for him, fist raised. He roared, fully intending to hit the man with the full force of One for All.
I'm so goddamn tired of all these goddamn villains—
Everything went black. He tried to twitch his muscles, but they wouldn't budge. His fist was still raised in front of him, frozen in time. He couldn't even breathe.
What… he tried to blink. Useless. ...what just happened?
Notes:
Izuku is loosing his goddamned mind.
Writing Magne I have decided I really like her quirk. It was fun. Probably my favorite chapter after Baku-punch. Also, Deku's about to get fucked.
Chapter 40: Checkpoint
Summary:
Izuku is stuck, and this time, he's not sure there's a way out of it.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Dark. As far as the eye could see, the blackness stretched on, just as deep and endless as space. Izuku counted the seconds, not just to stay sane, but also to gauge how long he spent in here.
346… 347… three hundred and—wait, was it seven or eight?
Despite knowing how useless it was, he tried to bite down on the capsule in his mouth. He'd been doing so well, until that mask wearing asshole showed up and did God knows what. It was frustrating, being so close and then having it all go to hell.
His chest felt strangely constricted. He couldn't contract or expand his lungs, but no matter how much time passed, he didn't pass out of oxygen deprivation or feel any of its effects. His head was clear, and his eyes didn't sting despite staying open for so long.
A pocket dimension. Infinite space that immobilizes whatever is caught in it? Does it only work on people or can it be used on objects as well? What about something less tangible, like air or heat?
…how long is he going to keep me here? How long can he keep me here?
It was a terrifying thought, to think he could be left in this emptiness forever. If its user died, would he be set free? Or would it make escape impossible and doom him to an eternal existence of nothing?
Something whispered in the back of his ear. Soft like a buzzing mosquito, hardly there but impossible to ignore. It caressed his eardrums like silk, tantalizing and demanding attention. If he concentrated, he thought he could make out words, but he didn't understand any of them. They blended into one another, a warbled mix of vowels and consonants. Was he finally losing his mind?
Or, he thought, even worse. What if this was the darkness around him, coming to life, here to swallow him whole. A living creature made of nothing, eating him alive like Dark Shadow consumed Tokoyami. Except Tokoyami was still there, under all those layers of darkness. Izuku would be ground to dust, and then that dust would be ground to nothing. Izuku would cease to exist entirely, and he wasn't sure his quirk could save him from that.
Just as the fear was so overwhelming Izuku was sure its cold grasp would never let him go, black bled into color. It was still dark, but instead of the ink deep void from his stagnant prison, these were shades of gray and dirt brown. The contrast was so strong, he might as well be looking at a rainbow. In front of him was a wooden floor stained with suspicious spots of unknown origins, brick walls, and a long slab of wood with stools clad in faded red bolted to the floor in a row next to it.
One for All fizzled out as he took stock of the new situation he'd been thrown into, not wanting to cause untold destruction until he knew for sure what was happening.
"Motherfuckers!" someone screamed. Izuku spun on his heel, searching for the voice.
"Kacch—"
He choked, unable to finish his sentence as a thick smog invaded his lungs. The room turned blurry as a mysterious fog engulfed it, and Izuku squinted in an attempt to fight against his lowered vision, groping blindly for the dark outline of Bakugou's shadow.
"Kacchan!"
Bakugou turned in his direction. He extended a hand, reaching for Izuku's. Their fingers hovered just centimeters apart when, for the second time that day, everything went dark.
"Wakey wakey, hero," a raspy voice filtered in next to his head. It was barely above a whisper, but it jolted Izuku awake, back straight and ready for a fight.
He was greeted by the cracked grin of Shigaraki Tomura, leering down at him.
"Hello," the raspy voice welcomed him, giving Izuku a small wave with a spindly looking hand. Izuku didn't bother returning the greeting, opting to peer around the dimly lit room cautiously instead.
It was the same room from before, before he passed out. Now that he had more time to take it in, he realized it was some kind of bar. A shelf lined one wall, carrying an array of differently colored and labeled bottles that looked to be there more for decor than anything else. If this place had a theme going for it, Izuku would describe it as 'sketchy'. Or maybe that was just his bias talking, as he was currently surrounded by a small crowd of villains. More concerning than that, however, were the two occupied chairs next to him.
Bakugou flexed his muscles, but it did little to budge the array of leather straps binding him down. His hands were covered, palms turned to press into each other to discourage the use of his quirk. A bright, clinical light had been positioned to shine down on the other chair, though its occupant had yet to wake up. Even with his eyes closed, Tokoyami didn't look rested. The corners of his eyes twitched fitfully, and he shivered. The man with the mask stood next to him, his hand resting on the bird boy's head.
His classmates' chairs were made of ordinary wood, but when Izuku looked down at his own, metal shined back. Shackles squeezed his wrists and ankles to the legs and armrests, and he tried channeling a bit of One for All, testing his bond's sturdiness.
"Don't even try," Shigaraki hissed. "That chair isn't meant to hold you, only slow you down. If I even so much as suspect you're trying to escape, your friends will be the ones to get it."
He jabbed a thumb in Bakugou's and Tokoyami's direction for emphasis. The explosive blonde glared at the appendage like he wanted to bite it off, but the gag covering his mouth made it impossible. No matter how much he worked his jaw, only muffled sounds escaped.
Shigaraki continued. "Assuming you're not a completely heartless bastard, you'll cooperate, won't you? After all, these are the people you've been fighting so hard to protect. Correct?"
"What do you want?"
Izuku refused to give Shigaraki the satisfaction of seeing his fear. He kept his tone hard and direct, meeting the villain's red gaze head on. He touched the cyanide capsule in his mouth with his tongue, but didn't bite down. He didn't want to waste the chance to ask boss-man himself some questions.
Shigaraki didn't answer right away. His face split in two with glee, figuratively and almost literally. The corners of his mouth bled from the dry skin pulling apart at the seams, and the man didn't even flinch. He opened his mouth, speaking with a voice that was akin to nails on a chalkboard. "I want to hear you scream."
A viscous feeling settled in Izuku's gut, heavy, but he refused to let it show. Keeping his voice and face neutral, he asked, "Is that all?"
Shigaraki's face twisted. He raised his hand, ready to strike. But then, he smiled, and all his ire bled out with a dark chuckle. His hand stayed where it was, hovering in the air, threatening. "With you? No. There is nothing else I want."
Izuku peered Bakugou's and Tokoyami's way. Tokoyami was still asleep, as expected, but Bakugou was staring at Izuku. His gaze was intent, fixed. Izuku could see the blonde's coiled muscles tense under the leather bonds, probably testing for any weaknesses, searching for any point that would give. His eyes moved from Izuku to Shigaraki, sharpening once they reached the latter. There was a dark smolder in his pupils that Izuku had never seen before, and he struggled to interpret it.
"I have other plans for your friends," Shigaraki provided, sensing Izuku's train of thought. "They'll live, so long they do as I say. You, on the other hand…" he brought a hand up to touch his face, caressing the upturned points of his mouth, feeling out his smile as if it was a stranger in the dark. "You're not getting out of here alive."
Izuku heard Bakugou shift, but he didn't look at the blonde, too preoccupied with studying every minute movement Shigaraki made. He blurted out, "Is this about the mall?"
"'Is this about the mall?'" Shigaraki repeated in a mocking high pitched note, looking incredulous. "Yes, this is about the fucking mall!"
Izuku bit back a scream when the man placed a hand on his shoulder. His skin felt like it had been set on fire as Shigaraki's quirk dissolved through cloth and skin with the same difficulty as kicking a sleeping toddler. He stopped once he reached muscles, apparently not willing to give his captive too quick of an end. Spiderweb cracks travelled over the length of Izuku's skin, bleeding red and growing in length with every shifting movement.
Someone growled, deep and low in his chest. Bakugou. Shigaraki ignored it, moving to Izuku's other shoulder.
"Hey, wait!" one of the villains called before Izuku could. He jumped in between his boss and Izuku, waving his arms. It was the green one, Spinner. Fuck. If he was here, then what happened to Mandalay and Tiger? "Look, I know this kid messed with you, but isn't this kind of fucked up? I'm not sure I like the idea of killing him, but if you have to do it, why not be quick about it?"
"Out of my way, scaly," Shigaraki sneered. "This is my territory, my group. I make the rules, and if you don't like 'em, then you can either die or leave."
"Come on, Spinner," Magne spoke, nuzzling a glass of bourbon in one of her large hands. The glass was dwarfed between her fingers. "Let the man do what he wants. There's no point getting worked up about it." She threw the glass back in one gulp.
"But—"
"You heard Magneto. Out. Of. The. Way. Or you're next," Shigaraki glared at his subordinate. Spinner glanced between him and Izuku, caught between a rock and a hard place. Then, he shrugged.
"Sorry, kid," he said. "I'll come visit your grave, okay?"
I don't need your sympathies. If you really felt bad, you wouldn't just stand there. Izuku grit his teeth.
"What happened to them?" Izuku asked. "To the heroes you fought?"
Spinner glanced to Magne, as if he was looking for permission. The woman smirked, that crooked ugly grin of hers.
"Wouldn't you like to know?" she said, turning on the stool she sat on to give herself a better vantage point, waiting for his reaction. Izuku slumped his shoulders.
"Thank God," he sighed. "That means they're alright then, or you'd already be rubbing it in my face."
Magne sneered, and the glass in her hand cracked as she clamped her fingers around it. Kurogiri gave her a disapproving look, which she pointedly ignored. She threw the glass down on the floor with a click of her tongue.
"Enough!" Shigaraki glared at Spinner and Magne. "If you're going to be such a bother, then go away. This is my time, and I won't let you assholes ruin it."
Without warning, he put his fingers on Izuku's uninjured shoulder, dissolving it much like he did the first. Izuku's exposed muscles stung in the open air of the dirty bar, and he held his breath to keep any whimpers inside. Even the smallest of movements rung the warning bells in his brain, telling him that something was wrong, stop moving, stop—
Shigaraki dug his nails into the exposed wounds and Izuku gasped. The man didn't use all of his fingers, preventing Izuku's shoulders from dissolving any further, but it was far from a mercy.
"That's the first," Shigaraki grinned. "Next, I'll make you sing."
Someone laughed, high in pitch and sharp like a cat's claws. "Aww, he's so cute! Please, Shiggy! Just one little stab, pleasepleaseplease!"
Shigaraki didn't pay the blonde girl sitting on the bar top, playfully swinging her legs back and forth, any attention. His eyes were glued on Izuku, drinking in any twitch of pain or sign of discomfort he found in the boy's face or body language. He brought one of his hands up, fingers outstretched. He moved them to a point, hand shaped like a cone, before moving the tips closer to Izuku's face.
First, the vision became clear. Izuku could count the groves and bumps on the pads of the villain's fingers. But as they inched closer, they turned into blurry spots, impossible to focus on. Izuku attempted to rear his head back once he realized the man's intent, but Shigaraki easily caught him with his free hand, pulling on his scalp and digging with his nails until Izuku was sure he drew blood. He squeezed his eyes shut, despite knowing how useless it'd be. A dark chuckle reverberated from in front of him.
"You know that won't help you," Shigaraki said. Izuku's eyes remained closed, unable to bring himself to open them. He heard the chair next to him bang and rattle against the floor furiously, and he wondered what was going through Bakugou's mind right now. Was he scared? Angry? Or did he just think of Izuku as a pathetic, helpless Deku? Would Bakugou mourn his death if he could?
Dry skin brushed against an unprotected eyelid. Pressing, prodding, piercing. When those fingers burned through the thin patch of skin and finally reached the green eyeball beneath, Izuku screamed.
For the third time that day, everything went dark. But this time, he could feel.
"Hey… hey, kid! Listen to me! Don't go! I said wait—you need to listen to me!"
"...what?" Izuku didn't know who the voice belonged to or where it came from. Everything was dark. Was he back in the mask guy's prison? But this felt different somehow. Wherever he was now… he couldn't feel his body. Only his mind, floating like a ghost in the void.
"That's right, just like that. Stay with me kid. Listen up, our connection is still weak so we don't have a lot of time. Now, you're going to need to pay all the attention you can to what I say."
Izuku thought he could see the outline of a person. It was white, staticky. A man? He was waving his arms as he spoke. He put one of his glowing hands on Izuku's non-existing shoulders, pulling on him.
"Wait, no! It's too early! You can't—"
The man's hand slipped free and the man started to shrink. He broke out into a sprint, chasing after Izuku, but no matter how fast he moved, he only appeared further and further away. Izuku reached out for him, trying to catch his hand, opening his mouth to shout something.
"Wakey wakey, hero."
Izuku started awake, drenched in sweat and shivering.
"What?" he blinked the blur out of his eyes. There was a memory in the back of his head, quickly fading. He tried to catch it, but the harder he tried to remember, the more it tapered into meaningless dribble. All he recalled was the voice. What did it say?
I need to remember, I have to remember—
Shigaraki snapped his fingers in front of his eyes.
"Hey, brat. Listen when I'm talking to you," he lowered his hand, sneering at his captive. He threw his arms out, gesturing at his lair like a proud mother. "This is my place. What do you think? It's gonna be the last thing you see, so take it all in while you still can."
Izuku's eyes rowed from left to right, registering his surroundings as much and fast as he could. Kurogiri behind the bar, the blonde girl, Magne and Spinner. A young boy sitting in the dark by one of the tables, staring down at the bottom of an empty glass. The man with the mask standing between Bakugou and Tokoyami.
"No," Izuku trembled in the shackles holding him down. "No no no no nonononoNO!"
He didn't consider the consequences when he started to pull himself free. It was too early, the checkpoint couldn't have moved, not now, not here. Not here not here not here.
"No no no no—"
"Fucking hell," that was Magne. "Shut up kid, would you? Where'd all that cockiness from before run off to, huh? This is just pathetic."
Izuku didn't pay her words any mind. One for All buzzed in him and the metal over his wrists and ankles creaked. He didn't have a plan, he just needed to—needed to—to do something.
"Stay still," Shigaraki hissed. He put his hands on Izuku's shoulders, and Izuku didn't have the mind to hold his gasp back.
"No, please," he struggled, even as Shigaraki reached his flesh. "This isn't right. I can't be here. It's too early. This isn't—right!"
"I don't give a fuck what's right or not," Shigaraki pushed him into the backrest of the chair. He moved his hands from Izuku's mottled shoulders and dug them into the boy's scalp. Dark green locks turned ashen gray and drifted to the floor like leaves in fall. Izuku felt like his skull was boiling out of his skin, and no matter how he twisted and pulled, he couldn't escape the constant searing pain.
"Gh—" Bakugou tried to speak under his gag. He roared, but it sounded hoarse, muted. His chair shook as he tried to pull himself free. Izuku listened to it, trying to slow his breath, ignoring how it felt like he was slowly burning alive.
"Hey, this is going too far," it was Spinner again. He pulled on Shigaraki's shoulder. "I mean, this is the guy Stain—"
"Shut the fuck up," Shigaraki shoved Spinner away with his elbow, but he let Izuku go. Izuku had the distinct feeling it was only because Shigaraki didn't want his fun to end so soon, and not out of guilt. Like last time. "You're not the boss here. I don't have to listen to shit you say, so piss off."
Surprisingly, the pain was helping Izuku stabilize himself. His thoughts started to pull into a semblance of coherency, like respooling a thread. He couldn't let himself panic, even though things looked to be the worst case scenario. He didn't understand how his quirk worked exactly, how much time he was sent back in time was never the same, but there had always been a way out of it. That wouldn't have changed now, would it? There must be a way out. Had to be. He just needed to think and find it.
"Okay…" he sucked in a lungful of air. "Okay. I'm calm. Calm."
Shigaraki clicked his tongue. "Did I ask you? Do I look like I give a fuck about your feelings?"
Izuku looked up. Shigaraki leaned over him, his long hair falling forward and casting his face in shadow. No, he did not have the face of someone who cared. At least, not the face of someone who gave a smidgeon of a fuck whether Izuku was comfortable or not. Would probably prefer if he wasn't.
"Look, you don't need to kill me," Izuku said, trying to think of an argument that would convince Shigaraki he was right. "I mean, wouldn't I be more valuable as a hostage? Is that an advantage you can afford to lose?"
"I don't need a fucking hostage. The heroes won't find us here. What I need is to see you dead."
"Okay. Okay. Um… let me think."
There must be a way to convince Shigaraki to let him live and leave him alone. Then, all he needed was an escape plan and everything would be dandy. He'd break himself, Bakugou and Tokoyami out of here. Easy. He'd worked with worse odds before, right? Maybe?
"No," Shigaraki lifted his hand. "I'm tired of listening to your whiny sniveling. Now, I wanna hear you scream."
"Wakey wakey, hero."
Izuku pulled himself free and jumped, aiming for Shigaraki. He turned to dust before he could even feel it.
"Wakey wakey, hero."
Izuku pulled himself free and jumped, aiming for Shigaraki. This time, he avoided his hands. One for All blasted through his abdomen, splitting the man in two. Magne barked as her shirt was covered in his guts. Spinner jumped back to hide behind the bar with a yelp. Kurogiri dropped the glass he was cleaning, breaking it open on the ground at the same time as he opened a portal.
Izuku heard the snap of bone and jerked his head in its direction. The man with the mask twirled a white marble on the tip of his pointer finger, patting Bakugou's shoulder with the other. Tokoyami slumped forward, and a spurt of red formed an arch before it soaked into the wooden floor with a splat. His head was gone.
Izuku's breath stuttered, caught between a scream of fury and a weeping howl.
"Don't move, or I'm taking this arm next," he said, squeezing Bakugou's shoulder. He flicked the marble in Izuku's direction and snapped his fingers. With a poof it returned to its original state. Tokoyami's head bumped against Izuku's foot with a wet thud.
Izuku stared at it numbly. He pushed his head up, meeting the man's eyes beyond the shadowed holes cut into the pristine mask. He raised his finger, pointing at the man. With less emotions than he was feeling, he spoke.
"You're going to pay for this. All of you."
He fought for all he had, even when he was more broken than whole. It wasn't out of any desire to continue this future. His motivation was nothing more than the fact he could, and he wanted to.
Crushing the mask in his hand felt good.
"Wakey wakey, hero."
Izuku pulled himself free and jumped, aiming for Tokoyami. He shattered the mask of the man behind him with one punch, along with his head. The wall was painted a mix of red and gray behind him.
"What the hell?!" Spinner lurched back, sticking his hands and feet to a wall.
"Oh!" the blonde girl looked intrigued, waving a box cutter in front of her face. "Squishy!"
Izuku turned to Shigaraki. "You're next."
"Oh, for fuck—Mustard! Do something already!" he shouted, stumbling backwards.
The kid by the tables sighed, before a purple fog filled the room. For the—who's even counting any more?—time that day, everything went dark.
"Wakey wakey, hero."
Izuku opened his eyes. He looked at Shigaraki for the longest time, watching his lips move but hearing nothing.
He closed his eyes, and he cried.
"Kid. You're back."
Izuku tried to turn, but his body didn't exist. There was only the voice, coming from every direction, a murmur and booming at the same time.
"You've really gotten yourself stuck in a terrible situation, haven't you? Can't say I envy you, but don't worry. I'm here to help."
"Help…? Who are you?" Izuku spoke, thought, something. He didn't have a mouth, but his words were clear. In either case, the voice seemed to understand him, as it answered.
"I can tell you who I am later, once you get out of this. But I only have so much time, and I don't want to waste it when there's more important things to do."
"How the hell are you going to help me?! I just keep dying over and over, and what was supposed to be my failsafe has been rendered useless since I always start in the same shitty spot. If there's something you can do to get me out of this hell, then spit it out already!"
"You need to calm down. I know it's hard, but you're going to need a clear head when you listen to me. You've still got an ace up your sleeve, one you don't know about yet. It's—"
"Wakey wakey, hero."
Notes:
This is what happens when you quick save right before the enemy kills you.
Just realized the voices of OfA are basically the witches for Subaru.
Chapter 41: Turning Wheel
Summary:
Izuku considers his options and comes up with a plan. Or something like that.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
"Wait!" Izuku gasped, throwing his head back with a flinch. His wrists stung as he pulled his arms instinctively to shield his face. He pried his eyelids open, meeting an amused Shigaraki. The villain chuckled.
"Good morning, hero," he said. "Had a nice nap?"
Izuku panted vigorously, eyes round as he stared at the man. He was running out of ideas, and with heavy trepidation, he said, "I know what you're going to do. You're going to torture me to death."
The villain's eyes crinkled into slits with mirth. "Look, the hero knows what's coming," his giggles joined the blonde girl, who was practically bouncing in her seat on the bar counter.
"Toga Himiko!" she'd said, pressing the blade into his cheek. "Please say my name before you die, okay?"
"Aw, he's so scared! Like a baby bunny! It's sooooo cute!" she practically sang her words, juggling the open box cutter in one hand, the sharp steel glinting in the low light as it pirouetted through the air, before she caught it by the handle with ease and started the process over again. "Come on Shiggy, let me have just one stab at him, pleeeeease!"
"No," Shigaraki snarled. "This brat's mine. I let you have your fun back at the camp, now it's my turn."
The girl pouted, sticking her tongue out at her boss when he wasn't looking. Izuku paid close attention to it all, every word, every action, everything. A plan was stringing itself together in his head. It wasn't a good plan, it was desperate, a last resort from being pushed into a corner with no other way out, but it was a chance.
I want to get out of here. Out o u t . I don't care anymore.
"I know more than that, Shigaraki."
That caught the villain's attention. He raised a wispy brow. "Oh?" he challenged, doubting. "Please, enlighten me."
"I know you want Kacc—Bakugou and Tokoyami to join you as subordinates," he glanced at his classmates. The man with the mask, Mr. Compress, managed to look smug despite his covered face, standing between the two teens, hands ready to strike. Bakugou scowled at Izuku, but it was more puzzled than cross. "You saw how Bakugou acted in the sports festival and decided he would make a good villain. Tokoyami was just a bonus."
"Hooo…?" Shigaraki cocked his head. "Did you figure that out yourself, or did someone tell you?"
"There's more," Izuku ignored the question, swallowing. "I could tell you how much Toga wants to stab me right now, but you already know that. Spinner doesn't like the idea of killing me, especially not through torture, because of my association with Stain, but he won't stop you. These restraints aren't meant to hold me, just give Mr. Compress enough time to kill Tokoyami in case I don't behave. He won't touch Bakugou unless he has to, and he'll only kill him as a last resort. If that isn't enough to stop me, Mustard will use his quirk to force me into unconsciousness. Not every villain is in this room right now. You have more waiting further inside. One of them uses fire, the other can create clones. Not to mention the noumus. The reason you kidnapped me is because you want revenge for the mall."
Shigaraki looked like he couldn't settle between feeling intrigued or disturbed, but from the way his fingers twitched, Izuku knew he wasn't sold yet. He could practically smell the man's bloodlust from here.
"One more thing," Izuku said. His tongue felt heavy, and his throat itched. "I know what you're going to say next."
The sickly looking man stilled. He almost sounded excited when he asked, "And what is that?"
Izuku worked his jaw. His lips parted. Closed.
"I don't know yet. But I will."
And he would.
"And then you'll listen to me."
And he would.
"What are you thinking, kid?! This is insanity! You can't let them know!"
"What do you expect me to do? This is the only option I have left. It's not like I want them to know my secret. But I can't keep this up for much longer."
The shadow—could you call it that when it was so bright?—walked up to him. Izuku could make out more details now than in their previous meetings. Something that could be goggles outlines the man's bald head, a heavy jacket hung over his shoulders and a bumpy belt strapped over his torso. He took hold of Izuku's hands, squeezing the fingers tight. That was new. He didn't have hands last time he was here. The limbs cut off a bit after his wrists, reducing to black plumes of smoke outlined by a bright white, floating in the void.
"Here. Your body still hasn't acclimated to One for All completely, but I can't stand watching this any longer. None of us can. I'm giving you my power."
"Power?" Izuku almost pulled back in shock. "What power? What are you talking about?"
"My quirk," the man held Izuku in place as the boy tried to pull away. He felt a strange vibration inside him, leading right into the very core of his soul. "I call it Blackwhip. It's a grade A quirk, so you better put it to good use. Just call on it and, well… I hope you're ready."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Izuku demanded. The man still refused to let him go. "Ready for what? What the hell did you just give me? Another quirk? That's, no, I can't believe—who the hell are you?" realization struck him. "You're… a previous holder of One for All, aren't you? Then…"
The man clutched his hands. "Don't forget," he said. "Remember what I just gave you. Don't forget," he repeated, over and over, crushing Izuku's fingers between his own. His eyes were a pure white, but Izuku still felt the pupils boring into him. "Don't forget."
"Don't forget."
"Don't forget."
"Don't forget."
"Wakey, wakey, hero."
Izuku was slow to open his eyes, "Don't forget," he murmured. He tried to stretch his muscles. Something was different. He couldn't put his finger on what, but he knew something had changed.
A spark ran through him and he stiffened, but it was gone before he could identify it.
"Don't forget?" Shigaraki copied his words. "Don't forget what?"
Izuku blinked the blurriness out of his eyes. It took a moment before Shigaraki's words registered with him, and another moment before he understood their meaning. "I'm… not sure," he admitted, fighting to recall where he'd heard those words before. "Something important… something…"
He was mumbling. Shigaraki raised his hand, and the back of his palm struck Izuku's cheek hard enough that he tasted metal.
"Don't care," the man said, a complete reversal of his previous position. "I won't have you distracted for what's to come."
Izuku's fingers moved. They jerked as if struck, stirring without his input. Like static electricity, the same spark from earlier, seizing his muscles from the tips of his fingers up to his shoulders. It didn't hurt, but it needled his nerves, like a limb waking up after falling asleep. His thoughts divided into two, one side telling him to remember, buzzing incessantly, a voice that didn't belong to him stuck on autopilot, telling him the same thing over and over. "Use it."
It was a distraction, and he tried to ignore it, concentrating on his original plan. He leaned back in his seat, ignoring how uncomfortable the metal chair felt digging into his back.
"Don't mind me," he told Shigaraki. "Please. Do your thing."
Shigaraki's eye twitched.
"You look smug now," the villain said. "Let's see how long that lasts."
"How am I supposed to use a quirk when I can't even remember I have it? What does it even do? And why do I keep forgetting these conversations?"
"It's like I said before. You still haven't fully grown into One for All, and your connection with the previous holders of your quirk is still weak. Even just these short conversations takes a great effort."
"How do I fix that?"
"Time. And I'm not just talking about your mind. That's part of it, sure, but your body needs time too. These… resets, as you call them, can't help you with that. Unfortunately."
"So, in short, there's nothing I can do but just… hope for the best?"
"Yes."
"Great."
The man sat down next to him, crossing his legs and leaning on one elbow against a raised knee. Izuku's body followed him down, and the man slapped his free hand over Izuku's back. He felt the impact, but it didn't hurt.
"Hey, don't look so down, kid. I said there's nothing you can do, but I'm still going to try my hardest. You're not alone. Got it?"
It was a good thing Izuku didn't have a head, or he'd probably be tearing up. "I don't want to go back."
"You're not alone," the ghost repeated. "We're all looking out for you, cheering you on. You're going to get out of this. Promise."
It was all too soon when the man faded into nothing.
"'Wakey, wakey, hero,'" he said before his eyes cracked open. When he did, it was to see Shigaraki's nonplussed expression. "That's what you were going to say, right?"
Shigaraki's gaze sharpened. Before he could speak, Izuku interjected.
"'How did you know that?'" Izuku turned his voice as raspy as possible, moving his lips faster than Shigaraki had time to protest. "'Stop it. You're not funny. Stop! What the fuck's your deal, you creepy motherfucker?! Your quirk's supposed to be enhancer related, not precognition! Hey, Kurogiri, what the fuck is this?!'" Izuku paused for dramatic tension. "And now, realizing I will just speak your every thought before you even have the chance to think them, you're going to stay quiet. Only for a bit though. You can't hold your tongue for long. Don't worry, I'll let you speak this time."
Shigaraki chewed on his lips, tearing up old and new wounds on the dry skin. His fingers trembled. Toga leaned forward, chin in her hands, elbows on her knees. The knife in her grip almost touched her cheek, and her eyes sparkled with intrigue.
"Oh—"
"'—this is fun! I've never met anyone with precognition before!" Izuku's throat hurt from the high pitch he forced it into. He blurted the most God-awful giggle he could manage. "'It's so creepy! I love it!'"
Shigaraki whipped his head in the girl's direction.
"'Shut up!'"
Shigaraki's jaw tensed, and he glared at Izuku. The boy shrugged, blinking innocently. "Oops, sorry. I forgot. Didn't mean to steal your spotlight. My bad."
The villain stalked up to him, grabbing the lapel of his shirt.
"'Anyone could've guessed that! You're not special!'" Izuku could have laughed at Shigaraki's indignant expression, but that was likely to get him killed. "And now you're going to slap your hand over my mo—mph."
Shigaraki clicked his tongue. His thumb hovered less than a centimeter away from Izuku's skin, a warning, the dry palm pressing flat over his victim's lips.
"What's this kid's deal?!" he looked accusingly over at the other villains. "Explain what's happening, now!"
Spinner jumped from his seat, backing away slightly, waving his hands up and down to calm his boss down. "Hey, I swear he wasn't doing any of this when we fought him! He was just quick and strong! That's it!"
Magne took a deep swig of her drink. "Like Spinner said."
"Then what the fuck?!" Shigaraki tore his hand off. He jabbed a nail into Izuku's forehead. "Don't you say a fucking thing! Just tell me what your goddamned deal is!"
"You want me to explain myself without talking?" Izuku questioned. Shigaraki's finger lowered until it was poking the skin between the boy's eyebrows, and Izuku decided that antagonizing the man further was a poor idea. "I don't have precognition. My quirk is just as you said. That much is true."
"But?!"
"But," Izuku held his tongue. Shigaraki leaned forward, waiting impatiently for his answer. "...hm. Maybe I'll keep that secret to myself. You're just gonna kill me anyways, aren't you? Why should I tell you anything?"
"Compress," Shigaraki's eyes narrowed in the masked man's direction. Mr. Compress tightened his fingers over Tokoyami's head.
"Don't," Izuku bit out. "You do that and I won't tell you shit. I'm serious. Look in my eyes if you don't believe me."
Shigaraki pulled on his curls, dragging his captive's head up and squishing the freckled cheeks, forcing Izuku to scowl up at the man. The boy set his eyes, making them as hard and cold as steel, not giving an inch. He meant what he said. If any of these villains hurt his classmates, he'd reset. There was no way he'd give them what they wanted.
"Tch. You really mean it, huh? Freak," Shigaraki dissolved a patch of skin in the space between Izuku's chin and cheek, but Izuku refused to let his gaze waver. The man let him go with a shove, and Izuku's chin dropped to his chest, resting against the nook of his collarbones. "This is bullshit. Let me think."
The man paced back and forth, before turning around and leaving through a side door at the end of the bar, disappearing into the rest of the villain compound. Izuku held his breath. Had he convinced Shigaraki to let him leave? At least long enough until the villain figured out what Izuku's trick was? Did he finally break the loop?
Izuku tried to stay calm. He knew the fallout of his actions could be disastrous. Even if he escaped from here, he doubted the villains would be content to leave him alone, and now, their motivations would be more than simple revenge. They would have a purpose that didn't previously exist, a drive to pull him apart and spill all the secrets he kept locked up deep inside. But what else could he do?
He peered over at Bakugou. The other teen's expression was screwed up in constipation, red eyes glued on Izuku. You could practically see the gears turning from here, and the blonde's eyebrows drew low on his face in scrutiny, like he was stuck looking at a very complicated puzzle. His pupils sharpened, trying to communicate to Izuku with his eyes alone. Unfortunately, Izuku wasn't sure what he wanted to say.
"I have some questions for you later, nerd," perhaps? "You better answer or I will kill you."
The wait for Shigaraki's return was awkward. An understatement maybe, but true enough. The villains didn't talk much, content to cast him the occasional glance before returning to their own devices. Toga was the only one carrying something akin to conversation, though calling it 'conversation' was generous. It was more of a monologue, prattling on about all the ways she'd like to kill Izuku and everyone else in this room, how exciting everything was, and did Izuku like the cute bunny sticker on her phone? It looked just like him!
It was almost a relief when Shigaraki reappeared. Izuku's nose twitched as the shallow wound on his face itched, and he really wished he could pull free to scratch it. The constant tickling was worse than the pain, in a sense. Pain was easier to ignore.
Shigaraki towered over him. He was positively fuming when he said, "We're going to keep him alive."
"Oh, does that mean I can stab him? Just a lil bit? Promise I won't kill him!" Toga bounced on her feet, waving the box cutter in Shigaraki's face. The man ignored her, turning to the misty man behind the bar.
"Kurogiri. Prepare a room we can keep him in that his quirk won't be able to break him out of. I want one of you losers to guard him, too. Make sure this slippery brat doesn't have a chance of escape. If he slithers free I'll kill whoever's responsible. I don't care who."
"Of course," Kurogiri nodded, or performed the smoky equivalent of what Izuku assumed to be a nod. "And the other two?"
"Keep them here. I want to talk to them, without this…" Shigaraki gestured at Izuku. "...one present. He's just gonna mess up my vibes."
Kurogiri put down the glass he was cleaning, had been cleaning ever since Izuku first woke up, on the counter, along with the rag he used to wipe it down. He disappeared in a wispy spiral of black fog, before returning moments later.
"I found a sufficiently reinforced room that should be able to hold the boy, and I have instructed Dabi to stand guard, along with one of our noumus. He didn't appear too pleased about the order, but he will follow."
"He better…" Shigaraki muttered. "Well? Get on with it!"
A black and purple portal opened under Izuku's feet, circular and large enough to take both boy and the chair he was sitting on with it. It landed with a thud on concrete floor, falling over to its side. Izuku cringed as his shoulder bumped against the hard surface. He used One for All to pry himself free, Kurogiri's floating head watching him.
"Remember, we still have your friends in our possession. From your earlier words, you are perfectly aware what will happen to them should you attempt to escape, correct?"
"Pretty fucking good idea," Izuku spat on the floor. Kurogiri's expression didn't change.
"Excellent. Then you will cooperate."
With that last goodbye, he was gone. Izuku took the chance to observe his new surroundings. Thick concrete walls, floor and ceiling. A grated drain in the corner, too small to fit through. A strange odor was wafting through it, one Izuku didn't spend too long considering its origins. There was a door to the left of him, heavy looking and made of what he assumed to be reinforced steel. He wondered how sturdy his cage was, and decided to test it by stepping up to one of the walls. He punched it, and it split into cracks. He pulled a sharp and loosened slab out, several smaller ones falling free with it, finding a barricade of metal hiding beneath. He tisked. He wasn't sure he was strong enough to break through this, at least not without breaking himself in the process. His knuckles already smarted just from the impact against the concrete.
There was a knock on the door. Without waiting for a reply, a voice called out. It sounded tired.
"Hey, whatever you're doing in there, knock it off. I'm not paid enough to come in there and turn you into a crisp."
Dabi.
"Fire-Fuck," Izuku said. The door was silent for a bit, before the voice spoke again.
"Hm. I was wondering what happened to him. So, you ran into Muscular, did you? Since you're here and he's not… you managed to take him out, huh? Pretty impressive. Too bad you still lost in the end."
"I also ran into a clone of yours," Izuku said, for no other reason but to put the villain off kilter. Or maybe it was a much simpler motivation than that, and Izuku just wanted to piss Dabi off. "You lost, by the way. You sure you can keep me in here?"
Dabi was quiet. He hummed, but didn't say anything else. Izuku sat on his haunches, taking this moment to compose himself. He closed his eyes, breathing through his nose loudly.
Alright. I'm still alive, he thought. Now what the hell do I do?!
Notes:
Deku channels his inner Joseph Joestar.
Also, Toga=best girl.
Chapter 42: Follow the Leader
Summary:
Izuku tries, trains, and talks. Someone listens.
Notes:
This chapter took a while because I was mapping out how I want the rest of this arc to play out... now I have somewhat of an idea so here I am.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Izuku sat hunched on the floor, knees drawn close, counting the bolts in the door. A way to pass the time as he thought, or to build up courage, rather.
A test.
Unpleasant, but the sooner he had his answer, the better.
He counted the bolts again. By the time he ran out, he stood up and walked to the door. He aimed at the hinges with the full force of One for All, and it blasted the thing hard enough to make a dent on the opposite wall. It also broke his arm in the process, predictably. Before he had the chance to step through, everything turned blue. The flames turned him to ash in less than a second.
Reset.
The smell hit him before his vision could clear. It was the same unpleasant odor from before, wafting up from the piping system connected to the room.
Back in my cell.
It's what he'd suspected, and he was relieved to not be back in the chair. It felt like progress. That didn't erase the fear that he'd irrevocably fucked up his chances and doomed Tokoyami and Bakugou to a terrible fate, but he'd tried fighting his way through the roomful of villains enough times to know there was no avenue there that would bring all of them through alive and safe.
In any case, waking up in the cell rather than the chair meant he was free to experiment breaking out of here without having to talk Shigaraki into letting him live each time. Small mercies. If he had to torture his vocal cords by mimicking one more villain, he would really lose it.
From his last attempt punching the door off the frame he knew it was, at least in theory, possible for him to escape from here. Now, whether it was possible to do so without pulverizing his bones or burning to death in the process was another matter entirely.
He counted the bolts. Then he walked up to the door.
I really wish I had some way to journal all of this, he thought as he raised his fist. 90%, One for All.
Izuku counted down the mental list he'd made. Four times he'd died in here. The first three had been through Dabi's flames. The last was the noumu, when Izuku had managed to talk Dabi into standing in front of the door before he punched it across the hallway. He'd taken one step outside, which was a marginal improvement, before a chainsaw promptly decapitated him. The noise of metal chewing through bone still grinded his eardrums, even now.
He counted the bolts.
What should I do? Do I really have to sacrifice an arm to get out of here?
Normally, that wouldn't be a huge deal, but he still had more villains to fight after this, and classmates to rescue. He needed all the fire power he could get. But the only way to get through the door in one hit was to use enough power to break him, and if he used less power but more punches, Dabi would kill him before he could finish.
He cursed himself. If only I had more, he thought, biting the nail of his thumb. More control of this quirk of mine, more power, more—
He reeled his head back as he felt his fingertips buzz. Surprised, he peered down at them. For just a second, he saw it. Black energy sparkled between his fingers. A name popped into existence, a memory he'd forgotten he was looking for.
Blackwhip.
He flexed his fingers, but nothing happened. He concentrated, trying to bring that power back.
I remember now, he thought. Well, sort of. It's still foggy, but I remember… I was talking to someone. This is his power. A previous holder of One for All.
The memory felt like it was running away from him, and he tried his hardest to draw that spark of power back before it escaped him entirely.
"Ouch," he closed his eyes, just as something whipped over his nose and eyelid. He opened them again, observing his hands with fascination as an ink black power like electricity danced between his fingertips intermittently. He moved them slightly to experiment, and one zig-zagging whip hit the floor, while another left an angry red mark over his wrist, before the quirk fizzled out completely.
"Damn," he muttered. But through his disappointment was a bigger excitement: this was a chance. Hope.
He ignored thoughts of escape, Dabi, the villains, his classmates, putting his entire focus on bringing Blackwhip back and taking control. He didn't know what this quirk was, what it did, but from the marks left on his skin and the name, he could guess.
Will this be useful for me? he wondered as his pupils narrowed in hard concentration. He dismissed the thought quickly. Even if he didn't have an idea of how to use it yet, more power meant more opportunity, whether that was now or in an unprecedented situation later.
I have time, he reminded himself. One quirk, two quirks, three or four. I'll take everything I can get.
Counting the bolts, he stood up and walked to the door.
"Hey, Dabi," he called out. His fingers twitched as he forced Blackwhip through. It took a few tries to get it working, but he was starting to get the hang of it. It was very much like learning how to control a new limb, or several. Using it was even harder.
Dabi was silent, not reacting to his calls. Typical. The villain didn't respond well to taunts, being a lot harder to rile up than someone like Muscular or Shigaraki. Annoying, but Izuku knew how to get him in the position he wanted.
"I'm bored," he said, tapping the door with his foot. "Tell me a joke."
Silence.
"What do you use this room for, anyways?" he continued their one sided conversation, looking at his surroundings. "...and what's that smell?"
"Quiet," Dabi cut in. "You talk too much."
"What else am I supposed to do?" Izuku injected his voice with a nasally whine, trying to sound as grating as possible. "How long am I going to stay here? What's your plan? I'm hungry."
Dabi shifted on the other side, no doubt growing peeved with the constant chattering.
"Don't know, don't care," he replied. "Now shut up."
Izuku stayed quiet for approximately thirty seconds, just enough time for Dabi to relax his guard and think the conversation had drawn to a close. He listened to the small sigh through the cracks in the door, and pounced.
"What happens if I need to use the bathroom?" he asked, mock innocence. "Don't tell me I have to use the grate. Gross. At least throw me some toilet paper."
Dabi pushed off of the wall he was presumably leaning on, changing to stand in front of the door. The metal slot covering the peephole shifted and it screeched as Dabi pulled it open. His electric blues glared at him sharply, ready to threaten him with bodily harm if he didn't shut his damn mouth already.
Izuku punched the door, obliterating it, Dabi, and his arm with one swift action. He jumped back, waiting for the noumu to react. It bent down in front of the door, slow as it tried to squeeze its hulking frame through the not quite big enough opening. One arm turned into a chainsaw, trying to saw through the surrounding material uselessly. The other shifted into a nail gun, aiming for Izuku's curly head. Before it could fire, the boy used his working arm to shoot out ink ropes that snaked through the air before latching onto the monstrously thick arm. He pulled, but the noumu didn't budge. The monster, confused, pulled its arm back to curiously observe the whips snagging onto its wrist. Izuku stumbled, before combining One for All with Blackwhip and tried to gain as much traction as he could on the floor with his shoes, before pulling. It didn't do much, and he slipped and fell on his face. Still, Blackwhip held on strong, staying intact until he manually deactivated it and let the noumu go. He scrabbled to his knees to use it again, aiming for the still running chainsaw this time. He missed the first time, hitting the wall instead, and a nail pierced his shoulder controlling his good arm. He grit his teeth, pushed through the pain, and tried again.
Blackwhip wound itself around the spinning blades of the saw, stopping it in its tracks. The black ropes held on strong.
It's durable, he noted, tugging it tentatively. And once I learn to control it, I'm sure its movements will be quite versatile.
This wasn't an escape attempt. He wanted to test the effectiveness of Blackwhip on a real target before he practiced fine tuning his control over it. Knowing how much abuse it could take would help in making future plans.
Blackwhip short circuited as Izuku's concentration faltered. Izuku wouldn't call his ability to use One for All innate, or even good, but it was still leagues ahead of Blackwhip it seemed.
The noumu turned its body, finally figuring out how to move to squeeze itself through the gap of the door. It ducked low, before lunging at Izuku. The nail gun turned to a sharp point, and he stabbed the ice pick through Izuku's torso. The boy allowed it to happen. When the creature raised the arm with the whirring chainsaw, Izuku closed his eyes. The spinning blades ate through his skull quickly, but stalled as bone and flesh got caught in the mechanism. It didn't matter. The blood loss turned Izuku's vision black in seconds, and the reset happened before he knew it.
Izuku woke up. He still remembered his newfound power, and wasted no time in working on it, flexing his fingers and poking at that unknown point inside him that called the black energy forth. It felt more sluggish than it did before his reset, and he deduced that his death put him back a step or two in his quirk's development. He's reasonably sure the vestige in his dreams mentioned something like that. Something about how using his quirks wasn't just a matter of mind power, but also his body growing used to it. Any progress his body gained would be lost when he died, returned to the point it was at his last checkpoint. Bothersome, but he'd just have to focus on what he could improve.
He ignored the smell from the grate, the bolts in the door, the wheezing breath of the noumu that could be heard if you strained your ears. He trained his command of Blackwhip as well as he could. Aiming, stretching, making the tendrils thicker and thinner, using one whip, using two or three or even more. It was easier to focus on one part at a time, the more processes he combined, the wilder his control became. At points, Blackwhip would turn off without warning. Other times it would explode in an untamable burst of energy, whipping and pulling at his face and body and the surroundings as if it had a mind of its own. Dabi had pulled the slot of the peephole back to see what he was up to after a particularly strong burst, and it was just in time that Izuku calmed the quirk down, hiding the still slightly sparkling hand in his lap and behind his legs, face turned down to hide the red marks marring it.
"...don't do anything stupid," Dabi warned simply, before pulling the slot back in place with a screech, and then presumably returning to rest against the wall.
Izuku raised his head. A small trickle of blood ran down his cheek, a result of Blackwhip ripping open the spot where Shigaraki previously decayed a small patch of skin. He waited a moment, before turning back to his training.
He wished he'd kept track of time—not that he had a convenient way to do so other than counting the seconds in his head—because he heard a voice at the other side of the door that didn't belong to Dabi.
Change. Something useful?
"Hey! Dabi-dude," the voice had a rough quality to it, almost sounding as if it was forced into a pitch lower than what was natural. A farce to sound more intimidating than he truly was. Izuku took a second to place it. "How's it going?"
"Spinner," Dabi returned, sounding less than enthused to talk to the lizard man. "...what do you want?"
"You look bored," Spinner said. By the loudness of his voice, he must be standing just outside the door. "Kid isn't causing any trouble, is he?"
Dabi didn't answer the question verbally, but he must have made some gesture before he said, "Get to the point, Spinner. Why're you here?"
"Let's switch! I can watch the kid for a while, how about it?"
"...does Shigaraki know about this?"
"Do you think he'll mind?"
"Probably," there was a beat. "But fine. Knock yourself out. I need to take a piss anyways."
Izuku listened as Dabi's footfalls grew more reticent as they turned down the corridor. When he was gone, a knock sounded at the door.
"Heeey… you in there, kid? You awake?"
Izuku weighed the merits of ignoring the villain versus answering him. With a sigh, he said, "Yup. Feeling just peachy."
The slot in the door opened. Izuku looked down at his lap, letting his hair fall forward to cover his face.
"This might be a bit weird," Spinner said. "But I'm sorta a fan of yours. Was. Is? Thought it'd be cool to meet you, so I was excited for that when Shigaraki said we would attack U.A. But meeting you in person, fighting you… you're not really what I imagined. I thought you'd be more heroic."
Izuku couldn't help but laugh. "Oh really? Well, I'll be sure to take your criticism into account, Mr. Villain. Excuse me for giving my damndest to make sure you and your coworkers don't murder me and everyone I care about."
He wished he could see Spinner's expression, but he didn't want to move his head and be forced to explain why his face was littered with bruises.
"That's a good point," Spinner said after some thought. "You did fight hard to protect your friends. That's the type of thing Stain would praise, right?"
I'm tired of these Stain fans, Izuku pinched the bridge of his nose, ignoring how sore the skin was.
"What's your motivation?" he asked. "You're a fan of Stain? If that's the case, then why are you hanging out with these guys?"
"Huh? What do you mean?" Spinner sounded confused. "Stain worked with the League, didn't he? I only want to follow his ideals. That means I should help the League too!"
"You think Shigaraki gives a crap what Stain wants?" Izukus shook his head. "You're under the wrong impression. Shigaraki only follows his own desires, he couldn't care less about Stain. He's only using Stain's reputation for his own benefits, just like he's using you. Be honest: I don't like Stain, but I don't think he's the kind of guy that would torture kids for petty revenge. Is that how you see him? Is your hero that shallow?"
"No!" he almost sounded offended. "Of course not!"
"And yet, you're content to play along with it," Izuku paused, letting his words sink in. "If you want to follow Stain's ideals, then you're doing a real shit job of it."
He looked up, ignoring the cuts and blemishes on his face, taking in Spinner's reaction. The man's brow turned down into a V, anger to have his loyalty put in doubt. It pulled down further, thinking. He spun on his heel, head bent forward.
"Give me a moment!" he called out. "I need to figure out if you're trying to trick me or if you're right! Let me think…"
Izuku waited, patient. He wasn't expecting much, but he was willing to try any avenue he could find. He didn't have anything to lose. Spinner muttered to himself.
"Maybe… but no… then again! But, if I did that—"
His one-party argument continued, and Izuku made himself comfortable as he waited for its conclusion, experimenting with Blackwhip in the meantime. There was a soft smack of skin against skin, or scales, rather, as Spinner punched his fist in his palm, reaching a conclusion. He turned, and Izuku dispelled Blackwhip before Spinner noticed. The man sprung forward, staring through the gap in the door intently.
"You're right!" he exclaimed. "I've suspected it for a bit, but I was holding out hope I was wrong. But Shigaraki doesn't care about Stain, does he? He's just doing his own thing, like you said. I can't… I can't accept that!" he nodded, determined. "But, what should I do? What would Stain do in this situation?"
Izuku's mouth fell open, a half formed idea. Is this… something I can use?
He clenched his fists.
"I don't like Stain, but… he wasn't wrong. Not completely," he said. Spinner nodded along, hanging onto his prisoner's words. "He's in prison now, but I'm still here. Someone he approved of. Not like Shigaraki. If you want to help Stain, then help me."
Spinner still didn't look entirely convinced, pressing his mouth tight together, doubting.
"Shigaraki would kill me."
"Are you a coward?" Izuku spat the words out. "Do you think Stain approves of cowards?"
That got his attention. Spinner straightened up, eyes hard.
"I'm not a coward!" he insisted. "I'm the man who will see Stain's will through!"
"Then do it."
Izuku pushed himself to his feet, approaching the door. He punched the metal, and it rattled.
"Follow in Stain's footsteps," he said. "And help me get this door open."
Notes:
What Would Stain Do?
Izuku recruits local lizard man to fight villains. More at 5.
Spinner: "We really do live in a society."
Chapter 43: Give and Take
Summary:
Spinner helps, and Izuku thinks. A bit too much.
Notes:
Gamers rise up.
Chapter Text
"I don't have the keys for the door," Spinner admitted, tapping his foot against the metal gate.
"Who does?" Izuku cupped his mouth with his hand, murmuring. "The door was already locked when I got put here… it would be annoying if there wasn't a way to unlock it, though a smart move on the villain's part, I suppose. Relying on Kurogiri's warping abilities to move prisoners around… but Shigaraki's someone who enjoys being in control. I doubt he'd be content without direct access to his victims. Question is: does he keep the keys on him, or somewhere else?"
"Hey, hey! I can't hear you when you speak so quietly!" Spinner complained. "Besides, I'm more concerned about this noumu. D'you think it'd attack me if I let you out?"
"That's a good question. Hey, why don't you give it a poke? See if it retaliates."
Spinner made a strangled noise like a choking cat.
"No way! Are you crazy?! I'm not a coward, but I'm not an idiot either! I won't pick a one-on-one fight with a noumu!"
Annoying, Izuku thought, sucking his lips to his teeth to keep from clicking his tongue in displeasure. I have no idea how this noumu's programmed; it's entirely possible it won't attack anyone tagged as an ally. Spinner could easily kill it in that case, without any danger to himself. If I'm wrong, I could just reset. Of course, I can't tell Spinner that. Unless…
He tapped his lip. He did present himself as a person with some type of precognitive ability not even an hour ago. If he told Spinner he'd be safe fighting the noumu and just go for it, would he listen?
Maybe I could provoke the noumu from inside the cell and trick it into destroying the door for me… but that would make a ton of noise, and I'd have to disable the noumu after that. At least I wouldn't break myself getting out of my cell.
"Don't worry about it," Izuku said, snapping his fingers and giving Spinner a curt bob of his head. "The noumu's instruction is to keep me here, that's all. It won't attack an ally, so you'll be fine."
"Huh…" Spinner peered up at the hulking monstrosity, looming several heads above him. Izuku could hear him swallow from here. "Y'sure? Because you didn't sound sure before."
"I'm sure. Do you think I'd ask this of you if I wasn't?" I should definitely feel more guilty for this. "Trust me."
Spinner eyed the length of the noumu, from its bare feet to its exposed brain. The villain shifted his shoulders forward, arms hanging low. From the limited gap in the door, Izuku could only see so much, but he assumed Spinner filled his hands with the many blades he'd hidden across his body.
"Alright," Spinner announced, dubious. "Here we go."
He leapt, and where Izuku couldn't see, he heard. A grunt, snapping and whirring, a scream cut off prematurely. Blood splattered the wall, before it was covered by a monstrous head. It leaned down to glance through the opening in the door. A purple helmet covered half its face, eyes hidden under a viridian pane of glass. Its mouth gaped open, saliva dripping over the uneven teeth as it groaned.
Izuku winced, looked away.
So that's a no.
"I don't have the keys for the door," Spinner admitted, tapping his foot against the metal gate.
Izuku hummed.
Maybe I should try tricking the noumu after all. I'm just afraid that as soon as we start making too much noise, Tokoyami and Bakugou will be in trouble. Then again, even if Spinner finds the key for the door, won't the result be the same? We'll have to fight the noumu either way, unless the thing is stupid enough that it doesn't register the door being unlocked as an escape attempt, which is… entirely possible.
"If I had to guess, I'd say Shigaraki keeps the keys to every door in this place either on him or in his room. Or any place he's got easy access to, really, without giving anyone else access. Can you think of any places like that?"
Spinner rubbed his chin. "...maybe."
He didn't start moving right away, and Izuku gestured with his hands impatiently.
"Well? What are you waiting for?"
"Dabi. I told him I'd guard you, and if he sees I've abandoned my post… he'll be pissed."
"Play dumb. Tell him you got bored and figured the noumu provided enough protection. He'll be annoyed, sure, but it's not like you're planning to stick with these guys for much longer, are you?"
"Hm. Point," he tapped the side of his head. "You're a smart kid. You'll be a good hero."
Izuku was surprised at the tug of guilt those words brought forth. He wasn't a fool, even if Spinner was his temporary ally, that didn't make up for or erase all the bad things he'd done. Or would do, once their alliance was over. Still…
Sorry for getting you killed, he thought. But I value my classmates' lives more than I do your's.
Whether he felt guilty or not, he wouldn't let that stop him from doing what needed to be done.
Spinner left to search for the elusive key, closing the slab over the hole peeking into the cell as he did. Izuku, for want of nothing better to do, continued to practice Blackwhip. The villains had stripped him of all possessions excluding the clothes on his back, so with no watch to keep track of time, he counted the seconds manually. When he reached the thousands, he grew worried.
Should it take this long or did Spinner get himself in trouble? Shit… how long do I wait until I reset?
A voice approached from the outside. Loud, grating, angry. The words were a mix of curses and complaints, and it didn't take long to guess who.
Shigaraki… fuck.
"Alright, alright… I get it. It was stupid of me to entrust him with the kid, won't happen again… boss," a second voice joined the other, droning monotonously and dripping with sarcasm at the last word. Dabi.
"You're lucky I'm even giving you a second chance, Franken-Freak. I should just..." Shigaraki growled. He stopped outside Izuku's cell, metal slot slamming open. His red eyes practically glowed with hostility.
"Think you're clever, huh?" he rasped out. "Kurogiri."
Something dropped behind Izuku, a noise consisting of the clatter of metal and something softer. He could already guess what it was, but he needed to confirm. Haltingly, he turned his head. He caught the black dot of Kurogiri's warp portal before it winked out of existence, and with a sense of dread, he turned his eyes to the floor. Spinner lay in an unceremonious heap, his knives spread around him like a steel crown from where they spilled out of their sheaths. One of his arms were missing, along with half his head, giving Izuku a clear view of the contents inside. His skull formed a bowl that caught the small portion of his brain that still remained, most having spilled out from earlier. Some of his scales were bent backwards, others removed completely, revealing red muscle beneath, like a fish that'd been scaled.
Izuku's mouth moved, but didn't make a sound. Sorry.
"When did you catch him?" he asked, eyes never leaving the still form.
"You think I'd tell you?" Shigaraki scoffed. "No, I'll just leave you to ponder that question until you die. Damn bastard… I don't care what sensei says, I'm going to kill—"
Izuku blinked, changing his focus from Spinner to Shigaraki. He regarded the man as he raised his hands, moving them to his throat. He crushed, tearing the skin and arteries out in a fountain of gore. A few drops of blood managed to reach through the gap in the door and landed on Shigaraki's cheek, and the man leapt back in surprise.
"What the fuck—"
Izuku smiled. He made a wheezing sound, red liquid bubbling over his lips in his obscure attempt at laughter. Shigaraki looked positively perturbed.
Never gets old, Izuku thought, before dropping to the floor with the grace of a dead Spinner.
"You're a smart kid. You'll be a good hero."
Izuku smiled sardonically. He wondered if Spinner, if Stain, if All Might or his mom, if any of his friends would think the same of if they knew everything he knew.
Spinner made to leave, but Izuku stopped him.
"Wait," he called out. Spinner observed him curiosity. "...where are you planning to look first?"
"I'll start with Shigaraki's room, then move on from there. Sure hoping he's not keeping the keys on him, or we're in trouble."
Izuku thought their options through. He knew Spinner would run afoul of something, and soon, but he didn't know if it started in Shigaraki's room or elsewhere. The blind leading the blind.
"Why don't you wait with that?" Izuku suggested. "If Shigaraki sees you rooting through his personal belongings, I'm sure he'd kill you, no matter what shoddy excuse you come up with. Start safe, as safe as you can, before you crank up the danger factor. Okay?"
"I'm not completely useless, you know," Spinner straightened his back, lifted his chin, and jabbed his thumb into his chest. "Stealth is my forte, actually. You might've guessed it already, but my quirk lets me stick to walls and ceilings like a lizard. You'd be seriously surprised at how rarely people look up—"
"That's great, but seriously, don't get seen. I'm not calling you weak, but do you honestly think you'd survive a fight against the whole League without backup?"
Spinner deflated. "...no."
"Good," Izuku nodded. "Be careful, don't take stupid risks. Stay hidden, stay alive. And, um…" it sounded stupid, but he said it anyways. "...make Stain proud?"
He cringed inwardly. Speaking it aloud was even worse than just thinking it, but Spinner's eyes lit up with a spark of determination, which is exactly what Izuku hoped for. He thinks. Maybe he doesn't want Spinner to be too determined, or he might take those stupid risks Izuku warned him against.
Guess I'm about to find out…
"Understood!" Spinner saluted. Wistfully, he added, "A new age of heroes… a new world…"
His eyes briefly dimmed over, lost in some fantasy, before he slapped his cheeks lightly and brought himself back. His eyes hardened, taking on a more serious edge. He didn't close the slot this time, and Izuku saw him stride away with more purpose than before. He disappeared from view, and Izuku was forced to sit as his legs started to shake. Anxiousness wormed its way into his guts. There was fear that his plan would fail, that his grain of hope proved useless, and shame. The shame of knowingly sending a man to his very possible death, albeit a temporary one.
Why does it feel worse every time I do it? It wasn't so bad the first time. It's like… I'm playing with human lives like they're pieces on a chessboard.
He stared down at his hands, fingers splayed open, palms up. I've killed before, he thought. He flexed the muscles, watching as the pale and jagged scars stretched taut over the scraped skin. I did it, with these hands. It was desperation the first time, almost an accident, but after—
He remembered Mr. Compress' mask shattering like glass, plastic shards digging into his knuckles. The skull followed shortly after. He remembered disemboweling Shigaraki with his nails alone, remembered crushing the one solid piece of Kurogiri's body that kept him alive, remembered tearing Magne's head off of her shoulders and crushing it flat between his palms.
It had been in the heat of the moment, passionate anger pushing him to commit acts a sane Izuku never would. He supposed that was the difference from then to here. He hated Spinner, sure, but he wasn't particularly angry at him. Not at the moment. If anything, he was a bit grateful, because the man provided him a step forward.
It had been in the heat of the moment, but in that moment, he'd enjoyed it. He'd taken notice of it, the sick pleasure he felt at hurting the ones who hurt him and his friends, but put off analyzing those feelings for later. He had more important matters to attend to, he'd told himself, but he also knew, he didn't want to think about it. But that piece of guilt as he sent Spinner off with his corpse still fresh on his mind, it reminded him of why he wanted to be a hero in the first place. He wanted to save people, to be like All Might. A paragon of hope, pure goodness, without any selfish motivations other than the personal desire to see people smile. Hero, civilian, villain, it wouldn't matter, because everyone deserved to feel safe and happy.
I'm not like All Might, he realized. The shock was like a physical blow, and his heart stuttered. I… I can't be like All Might! I can't—Oh God—I messed up! I completely fucked up! Since the moment I killed Stain, I ruined it completely! Everything I was supposed to be, I… fuck! FUCK!
He could tear his hair out. He wanted to, but settled for digging his fingers into the wound on his cheek, digging until blood ran down his throat. He messed up. Completely fucked up beyond saving. Screw second chances, he had that, and he'd repeatedly done the same thing over and over again! Because he was angry, because he felt robbed, because he thought he was justified, and it's not like anyone but him would know the truth. But did that really make it okay? This was part of him now, a smudge that couldn't be wiped clean. The mark, the stain, of a killer.
He could push the blame on the villains all he liked, but in the end, he made the choice. He really was fucked up, because despite acknowledging his wretched actions, despite his regret…
It was regret for all the wrong reasons. Regret for not living up to All Might's expectations—no, his own expectations—regret because he'd never be able to fulfill his dream, regret because Izuku wasn't who he thought he was. He didn't regret what he did because it was wrong, he regretted it because of how it affected him.
Arrogant. Selfish. Was this how he'd always been? Or was this where he'd been pushed?
He thought back to the lives he'd taken, and he thought, They deserved it.
He pushed himself to his knees, crawled over to the grate, and emptied the contents of his stomach down the drain.
Four tries. The keychain jingled as Spinner switched between his options. The click and creak of the door swinging open announced his success. Spinner jumped up on the ceiling, but the noumu didn't so much as twitch. He breathed out a sigh, dropping back down.
"They were in his room after all," Spinner said. "But I did as you said. I was careful, and I'm sure no one saw me. We shouldn't dilly-dally though, I think Shigaraki wants to check on you soon."
Now that the door was open, he had a better vision of the hero student. He gave Izuku a once over, brow raising. "What happened to you? You look terrible!"
"I'm fine," Izuku said, not caring enough to explain himself. He was still inside the cell, and he glanced over at the noumu just visible outside. "So… moment of truth."
Spinner cleared a good distance between the door and the monster. "Uh, yeah, you… yeah. I'll just stand… aaaall the way over here."
He shuffled up a wall, looking like a cat with its tail raised, ready to either strike or skitter away at the drop of a hat.
"Go ahead," he said.
Izuku did.
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