Chapter Text
oooOOooo
Christmas Eve Morning
It was cold out, way too cold for this to be Georgia and predictions were it was only going to get worse. He'd heard on the radio that by noon there'd be whiteout conditions. An ice storm was coming followed by a snow storm, and both would be accompanied by high winds. The roads were already slick, covered in a layer of ice from the freezing temperatures.
The news was telling everyone to stay in, no unnecessary travel. Conditions were hazardous not just in Georgia but throughout the south.
He was staying right there at home, hunkered down. He didn't have anywhere he needed to be but home. He'd planned for a long time to take the day off, in fact he was taking the whole next week off. Unless he had an emergency call.
And sure enough at 7:00 am one of those calls came in. He couldn't tell her no, not Mrs. Heywood, she was an elderly widow whose furnace had gone out. In these conditions it would be giving her a death sentence. "Yes Ma'm ya bundle up an my Shadow an me will be there quick as we can."
He changed into insulated jeans, thick wool socks, and put on a heavy flannel shirt. His Shadow was trying to mimic him but he was having a little trouble. "Lemme help ya now or we'll never get outta here."
They got to Mrs. Heywood's and he was grateful to find it was just the pilot light that had gone out. He got the furnace going but just to be on the safe side he'd also built a fire for her in the old wood stove. He carried in several bundles of firewood, enough to tide her over until he could stop back by in a few days and check on her. "Lemme pay ya Daryl."
"Nah Ma'am we're good. I didn't do much a nuthin'. Ya just keep a log on that fire an ya call me if ya got more trouble, k?"
She handed his Shadow a cookie, "Well I insist ya take this loaf a cranberry bread, an thank ya Daryl you're a good man."
"No problem Miz Heywood, thanks for the bread an ya have ya a Merry Christmas now."
"You too Son."
He was back on the two lane and headed for his place, thankful he was in his work truck. It weighed heavy and sat low so he felt pretty sure of it on the bad road. But that rain mixed with ice that was falling was making him anxious to get back home.
Then he saw it up ahead blocking both lanes, a big tree limb lying across the road, and there was a small passenger car that had slid off the side. Whoever it was must have tried to brake too fast and lost control.
He pulled over slow and told his Shadow, "Ya sit tight now, ya hear? I'll be right back." He hurried over to the vehicle and saw the blond head leaning against the steering wheel, not moving. Thinking the worst he muttered "Shit," as he pulled the door open. But her head came up quickly and her eyes went right to him, scared looking and with tears running down her face.
"Ya okay? Ya get hurt?"
"No I don't think so. I think I'm alright I'm just scared is all."
"C'mon then, come with me. We gotta go. Ice is blowin' an the temperature is droppin' fast, c'mon. I got a boy in the truck, can't leave him."
"I'd like to take my bag, please."
"Yeah, yeah c'mon hand it here."
He got her up in the truck, threw her case in the back and barked, "Ya stay put now, the both a ya. I'ma try an move that branch, otherwise we're gonna have take our chances a goin' over it." He grabbed a small ax from the tool box and ran over to the big tree limb. He hacked off and tossed aside enough branches to clear a path, and hurried back to the vehicle, practically jumping in, "Alright, now we just gotta make it two more miles."
She'd been so scared and she realized now that she hadn't thought this through; she'd just done what he said. But seeing the little boy did make her feel better. Obviously he was a family man, probably not a serial killer. Hopefully. "I'm Beth Greene. Who are you?"
"Name's Daryl Dixon, this here is Timmy Dixon." That was all he said. She could see he was concentrating hard on the road, it was getting nearly impossible to see and she didn't want to distract him. She'd had enough close calls for one day. She'd just wait and talk to his wife.
They pulled off the highway and followed a barely visible road that was already covered in snow and ice. When they'd gone some distance she saw the faint outline of what looked to be a shop building. It was so hard to see she wasn't sure, but he headed right toward it. "Y'all stay put, ya hear?" And he lept from the truck and moved quickly through the snow, pulling the shops' big overhead door up. He got back in the truck and drove into the shop and as he looked at the little boy, for the first time he seemed to relax, just a little, "We're home now Shadow."
The little boy hadn't spoken to either of them, he just kept his eyes trained on his Daddy. He was a beautiful child with dark blond curls, pale skin and vibrant blue eyes. He looked to be about three. The man, Daryl, took the boy from the car seat and instructed him, "Ya keep your face buried in Daddy's shoulder, then ya won't get ice on it, an ya try an hang on ta this bread Miz Heywood give us, K?" The little boy nodded, "Yes Daddy."
Then he looked to her, "C'mon an hurry now, we need ta get in the house, this ain't gettin' better anytime soon."
He had the little boy held close to him with one arm and her case in his hand. It wasn't like she had choices so she just did as he said. The minute she stepped out of the shop building and onto the icy ground she slipped. Before she knew what was happening he'd dropped her case,and his arm was around her waist, holding her upright and close to his side. "Lemme get the two a ya inside, I'll come back for your case."
She couldn't believe it, the visibility was nearly zero as they carefully trudged to the house. With the ice coming down hard and pelting their faces, and the wind howling the way it was, she knew she would have never even seen the house if he hadn't led her there.
He opened the door, kicking his boots against the door jamb to knock the snow off. She did the same, not wanting to upset his wife by making a mess in her home. He rushed her and the boy inside, "Y'all stay put, I'ma close the shop door an get your case."
When he'd shut the cabin door she looked to the little boy, "Is your Mommy home Timmy?"
He just looked confused and she didn't push him, she had no desire to frighten small children. She noticed the wooden coat hooks on the wall by the door and that was her cue. She took the loaf of bread from the little boy and set it on an end table and then removed his coat and hung it. She slipped his boots off, "My goodness Timmy your feet are freezing." She was rubbing those little feet, trying to warm them up when Daryl Dixon walked back in.
He took his coat off and hung it but he was watching her and she felt the need to explain herself. "His feet were so cold I was just trying to warm them."
"That's nice but ya better get your own wet clothes off now. Timmy ya go get your slippers on Son."
"K Daddy." And off he trotted.
She took her opportunity, "Is your wife home?"
He looked puzzled for just a moment and then smiled a sort of barely there and funny kind of half smile, "Ain't got one, never did."
"Oh I see, I'm sorry."
"Ain't nuthin' ta be sorry about, an nah ya don't see it girl. Whatever you're thinkin' ain't what it is." And that was all he said leaving her completely confused. Now she was starting to worry. She'd willingly gotten into the vehicle of some man she didn't even know, and here she was virtually trapped in his house with him. Somewhere in the middle of nowhere in a raging storm. Good thinking Beth. Of course, if she had stayed where she was she'd probably be dead by Christmas. Either way it wasn't looking real good.
He called to his son, "Timmy! Where's my Shadow? C'mon now n help Daddy stoke this fire." The little boy came running in from what she supposed was his bedroom. As his Daddy knelt on the floor in front of the big wood stove, the child took a log from the neat stack and handed it to him. "Thatta boy, I think one more's gonna do it for now." And again the child handed him a log from the stack. After placing the log in the fire Daryl shut the heavy cast door of the woodstove and stood. "See there? We'll be warm an dry now Son."
He trained his eyes on her, "So now tell me why the hell ya was out drivin' by yourself on an ol' two lane, when they done shut down the whole damn state? Even the governor was warnin' everyone ta stay in. Ya got ya a death wish?"
"It's a long story." She was embarrassed; it had been stupid that was clear to her now. And just to really embarrass her, she'd felt the color come to her cheeks.
"Timmy an me got nuthin' but time, we ain't goin' nowhere." The little boy stood right there by his Daddy, imitating his stance and his focused stare.
No sense fighting it, she shrugged, "I've been living in Atlanta for about a year, just to kind of see what city life is all about. I didn't have a great job or anything, but it was enough to rent a tiny studio apartment and feed myself. I thought everything was going pretty good until two days ago. Out of the blue my boss tells me he's got to let me go, there's not enough work. Merry Christmas to me. I don't have any savings or anything, and the rents' due next week. It was really kind of a blessing anyway, I don't think I'm cut out to live in the city. I just packed up what little I had, stuck it in the trunk of the car and I was on my way home. All I wanted to do was just get there for Christmas."
He just nodded his head, "You're lucky, it coulda been a real bad Christmas for ya, an your folks too."
"You saved my life." It was like she was just realizing it.
"Whatever. Did ya call your folks an let 'em know you're okay? Ya best call 'em."
"You have cell service here?"
"Yeah, we're not far from a ranger station, you'll ping offa their tower. Me an the boy we're gonna get us a stew started for supper." He pointed toward the wall, "There's a TV set there, an there's some books on the shelf, mostly nature an such. Ya go ahead an entertain yourself."
"Thanks, I can't believe your power is still on."
"We're livin' off the grid, got a generator, a well an a septic system. We even got solar."
"And TV?"
He smiled what was almost a real smile, "Well we do got a satellite dish. Me an Timmy we like our cartoons, western movies and nature shows. An I get the radio that way too. We ain't completely backwards out here."
"C'mon Timmy." And just like that he and the young boy went to the kitchen.
That's when she finally took a look around. It was simple, comfortable, and very well kept. The front room area had the woodstove in the corner, with the neat stack of logs next to it. There was a big overstuffed sofa, an easy chair, a recliner and a couple of small end tables. There was a big braided rug in front of the sofa that along with the fire added to the room's cozy feel. Off in a far corner was an antique roll top desk with an old fashioned wood office chair, a bookcase stood next to it.
In the corner opposite the woodstove was a small Christmas tree. The tree itself was perfect but it was definitely lacking in decorations. There were lights strung but only six or seven ornaments hung from it.
There were very few things adorning the walls, a photo of Daryl and Timmy, both had a big smile and she thought they should smile more often. They were so handsome when they did. There was a large crossbow hung near the front door that looked both well-cared for and well used. The only other thing, and the only hint of modernity she'd seen in the place, was a large flat screen TV mounted on the wall opposite the sofa. She could picture the man and his son sitting there watching some ancient cowboy movie.
She called her folks and explained about the mishap, he could hear her trying to calm them, "No I'm fine Mama I promise. A real nice family came to my rescue and took me in, I'm safe and warm. I'll call you as soon as the roads are passable again. Yes, yes okay I love you too. Yes I promise, I'm fine."
She wandered into the kitchen to see what they were doing. The little boy was sitting on the counter closely watching his Daddy. Daryl had dredged some big chunks of meat in flour and was browning them in a large cast iron skillet. "See there Timmy, ya just wanna brown it, not cook it all the way through, then ya put it in the big pot. It'll cook more with the stew. K?"
"Yes Daddy."
He spoke to the small boy as if he was a grown up, and like he was going to do this very same thing himself, maybe as soon as tomorrow. And the little boy acted so serious like he was absorbing every bit of the information. All of it made her smile.
"Are you expecting him to start cooking any day now?" She asked it in a very lighthearted way.
Daryl looked serious, not angry, but definitely serious, "It's my job ta teach him things an it's his job ta learn 'em. He's all I got an I'm all he's got. We gotta be able ta lookout for each other."
She was a little taken aback by the solemnity of his answer, and sad. He made it sound like they were the only two people left in the world. She didn't want to make a big deal out of what really wasn't her business, "Well I'd like to help if I could, I'm a fair cook."
He looked at her like he was gaging her ability, "Yeah okay, I guess if we're all gonna be eatin' it we can all help fix it. How's your carrot choppin' skills?"
"I'd say I'm above average."
"Sounds good. I like ta use alotta vegetables in stew cuz it's about the only way Timmy likes ta eat 'em."
"Then it's a great idea and I love vegetables myself, the more the merrier." She smiled, genuinely looking forward to helping with the preparation. And it did turn out to be fun all of them helping a little. She noticed he was extra cautious about the little boy, not letting him too close to the range or near the knives, and he never stopped explaining to him what they were doing.
As they worked she took in the big square kitchen. There were plenty of cabinets, but also some open shelving that held lots of colorful jars of home-canned fruits and vegetables. The cabinets didn't have the slick and polished style of new cabinetry. These cabinets had a rough hewn and handcrafted look to them. They definitely fit the personality of the cabin. The big white farmhouse sink, the huge freestanding gas range, and the round top refrigerator all looked like what her grandmother used to have. The counters were wood but not butcher block, just thick wood that while it looked perfectly clean and sanitary, also looked ancient. There was an eating area at one end of the room, next to a big window, and the simple dinette had that 1950's diner look.
"Did you can all these fruits and veggies Daryl?"
"Nah them are all from trades I made. There's some elderly folks I help out around here. I don't take money from old folks so they trade me canned an baked goods. I like the way it works out an so do they."
"That's wonderful, what kind of work do you do?"
He snickered a little, "What I really do is heatin' an A/C, but folks call me for every kinda job they either don't know how ta do, or can't do. I guess that makes me a jack a all trades. Keeps me busy an no one seems ta mind that I bring my Shadow with me."
"Well it sounds like you keep busy and I'm sure he's a very capable helper."
"He's a real big help ta me. He knows most a the tools an he don't complain, he just watches an learns." She could tell the man was proud of the little boy, and Timmy smiled when his Daddy spoke of him that way.
"I'ma fix me an my boy lunch now, ya hungry? I got plenty."
"Thank you I am hungry. Can I help though, you've done so much."
"Ain't nuthin'. But yeah, if ya wanna. I set aside some leftovers, rabbit an biscuits. Will ya eat rabbit?"
"Oh sure. I was raised on a farm I'm not skittish about meats."
"Good, that's venison I used in the stew."
He watched her as she ate, doing his best to be discreet. She was pretty, he'd noticed it the minute he opened her car door and she looked up at him with her tear stained face. And tiny, he knew that when he'd half-carried her from the shop to the house. She seemed real nice, pleasant. She'd warmed Timmy's feet, offered to help with the meal and never complained about anything.
He'd never been a guy who got around with women much, and he'd never had a steady one. Once Timmy came to be with him there were no women at all. His life was devoted to the child. Now this woman had shown up and caught him by surprise. But he wasn't kidding himself. The only reason she was here with him and Timmy was because she couldn't go anywhere else.
She looked at him, smiling, "If you had some paper I could help Timmy make some decorations for the tree. I think it would be fun and I'd clean up any messes we made."
He looked at her, curious, did she think he was disagreeable? "I don't mind, an yeah I got copy paper an I got construction paper for Timmy. But he has ta lay down after lunch. He needs a little rest in the afternoon or he gets kinda cranky later. He stays down about an hour, so after that, k?"
"Yes that would be great, I think we'll have fun."
"Speakin' a his nap, so ya know, I'ma lay him down in my room. Ya can bunk in his room while you're here. Sorry the sheets ain't fresh today, yesterday was laundry day. He don't have accidents or nuthin' though."
"Its' fine I appreciate it, but are you sure it's not an inconvenience? I don't mind sleeping on the couch."
"Nah, he'll be fine in there with me."
She was surprised with how relaxed she'd begun to feel with them. She'd started to realize that as big and rough as he looked, and as raspy and coarse as his voice was, he was obviously a very nice guy who seemed to take really good care of his young son. And there was no denying he was handsome, and very nicely built. His shoulders were broad and squared, and she could tell by the way his shirt seemed to strain that his arms were quite muscular.
She wondered what the story was on the boy. When she'd asked him about a wife he'd seemed kind of flippant, like he definitely was neither heartbroken nor bitter. She wished she had the nerve to just ask but again she felt it wasn't her business, she didn't want to pry.
What convinced her she had nothing to worry about with Daryl Dixon was when Timmy woke from his nap. It was apparent the little guy was one of those people that's slow to wake, the kind that need some hugs. That's just what his Daddy did, he sat in the big chair and he held the little boy close, running a hand through his son's curls and asking questions in such a soft voice, barely above a whisper. "How's my Shadow? Did ya have sweet dreams? Get plenty a rest did ya? Ya know Daddy loves ya, right?" It was tender and loving, and it seemed to contradict the look of the man to be so gentle.
Soon the little guy was back to being a wide awake child and his Daddy told him, "Beth is a nice lady, isn't she son? She's gonna show ya how ta make some decorations for the Christmas tree, K?"
Timmy nodded and smiled, "K Daddy. K Bef." And with that the curly headed little guy stole her heart.
Daryl got them set up with paper and scissors and even crayons. She saw that his Daddy had all the coloring goodies for him, and even a pair of round tipped children's scissors. And Daddy sat at the kitchen table with them and watched. She didn't feel for a minute that it was because he didn't trust her, she noticed he paid attention, like he was always learning.
She folded the paper slowly, giving Timmy step by step instructions, then she folded a second. "Okay Timmy, I'll show you one first, then you can try the next one and I'll help you, okay?" He nodded with a very serious look on his face.
She cut the paper, carefully opened the folds and showed him the snowflake. He clapped his little hands and smiled, and she got a little bit of a thrill when his Daddy said, "Dang that's cool. Show us that again."
By the time they were done they'd made close to twenty of the snowflakes. Timmy's were kind of a mess, but he didn't know it and no one was telling him so. He was quite proud of his creations. "You did such a great job Timmy, I'd never guess you hadn't done this before because you're really good at it."
Daryl looked at her wondering if anyone was really so nice. He went to his desk and got the hole punch and some paperclips. He made the small hole in each snowflake and bent the paper clips to use as hangers, they all took turns hanging the paper snowflakes on the tree.
She noticed how big and proud both their smiles were at the sight of the paper ornaments hanging on the little tree.
He'd watched her, she was good at this. Not just making the snowflakes but the way she talked to the little boy, the way she encouraged him and was so patient. It was almost an emotional feeling for him, watching this woman, a stranger, show love toward his boy. He'd always been the only one in Timmy's life but he found he didn't mind her stepping in one bit. She had a kindness to her, a gentle spirit.
After they'd had dinner and the kitchen was clean he smiled at his son, "Okay one program, which is it, Rudolph or Frosty?"
"Fwosty."
"Alright, Frosty it is." The little boy climbed up on the couch and his Daddy sat next to him. She chose a chair and Daryl started the recorded cartoon.
When it was over he looked to the boy, while resting a hand on his head, "Bath time son." The little boys' expression changed dramatically as he began to softly cry. Beth was confused by that. "I'm sorry son but ya gotta, an besides, ya don't want Santa comin' an you're all stinky do ya? He probably wouldn't like that."
It didn't seem to change the little guys' feelings about the bath, "He hates to bathe?" She asked it without really thinking it wasn't her business.
"He wouldn't mind it so much if he didn't hafta wash his hair. That part scares him some."
"I might be able to help with that Timmy, I know a magic hair washing trick. It won't let soap in your eyes or water in your nose. Do you want to try?"
She had the attention of both the little guy and his Daddy and the little boy gave her nod.
She and Daryl both knelt by the tub, Beth took the clean washcloth and told the little boy, "Now watch closely, the magic goes into the washcloth because of the way I fold it, it's kind of special and I say the magic words 'abracadabra.' Your job Timmy is to hold the magic washcloth over your eyes while I wash your hair, don't move it though, okay?"
"K Bef."
He held the washcloth over his eyes while she kept a strong hand on his back, gently coaxing him to lean back. She used her hand to scoop up the water and carefully get his hair wet, all the while asking him, "Okay? Is the magic working?"
"K." He would answer, while his Daddy looked on amazed not just at the way his son was so trusting of this woman, but of her. He couldn't believe how easily she'd handled this situation he'd struggled with so many times. Again he marveled at the soothing gentleness in her voice and her manner, and she showed such kindness and patience with the little boy. Soon his hair was washed and he was dressed in his warm jammies, all ready to lay in bed and wait for Santa Claus. Not a tear had fallen during what had always been the worst time of the day.
She went to the door of Daryl's room and watched as he tucked the little boy in. Like the rest of his home the room was simple, there was a big four poster bed, a dresser, a night table and a chair, and a sweet little boy under the covers. "Alright Shadow ya gotta sleep now so Santa can come, k? Ya been so good all year an I'm sure he's gonna bring ya sumthin', k?" Daryl hugged the boy and kissed his head. Again she saw the gentle side of this rough looking man.
She took a chance, "Can I give him a little hug goodnight?" She'd already found herself growing so attached to the child.
Daryl looked to her, "Yeah sure. He never gets girl hugs, he might like one." She almost laughed but she was also wondering if Timmy's Daddy ever got girl hugs, she was thinking she wouldn't mind at all giving him one.
She settled for just Timmy this evening, "Goodnight Timmy, you sleep tight and I'll see you in the morning, okay?"
"Night Bef." She could feel the huge smile on her face at his simple words.
When he was sure the little guy was asleep he'd gotten the gifts from the coat closet. There were just the two, one was a big metal truck, the other was a small crossbow. The bow was obviously made for little people with arrows that had soft spongy ends. Neither was wrapped and she asked, "No wrapping paper?"
"Yeah shit I forgot about it. I'm tryin' ta do this Christmas thing right. I want him ta have that but I don't know much about it. I never had Christmas growing up."
"Why?" She immediately wished she hadn't asked, she didn't want to snoop.
He didn't hesitate, "A mean bastard of an old man. But just cuz I didn't get ta have it, don't mean I want Timmy doin' without."
She had no way to respond to that so just asked, "How about newspaper? It makes good wrapping, especially the comic section."
"Serious?"
"Yes serious."
"Well I got a lotta newspaper, I take all I can offa people's hands. I use it ta start the fire in the stove. Funny papers huh?"
She nodded and he went to the kindling box and dug out the papers. She showed him how to wrap the packages and he smiled, "Damn woman ya know how ta do everythin' don't ya?"
She laughed then, "I guess I'm a jill of all trades, but only with the children's things. I've always wanted to be a Mom ever since I was a tiny girl."
"Well I think you're gonna be a perfect one." He was starting to dread the weather clearing. She'd be gone then and he and Timmy would likely never see her again. He didn't like the idea of that. Not at all.
He wanted to talk to her, he had so many questions and things about her he'd like to know, he just wasn't sure how to ask.
She was so curious about him, everything about him. Who was this man with the little boy and the harsh sounding past? She'd like to know more but she didn't feel comfortable asking.
So instead they sat on the couch and watched the news. "I only watch when Timmy can't hear it, there's too much bad stuff he don't need ta know it."
"That's a good idea."
She thought it might be hard to sleep in the strange house with the little boy and the man she didn't really know. But she must have been more comfortable than she realized because as soon as her head hit the pillow sleep came.
They were up early, she could hear them in his room, Daryl was talking to the little boy. She glanced at her watch, 5:15. It sounded like he'd been soothing the child again, but suddenly the little boy seemed to wake completely. She heard the giggling and squealing as his Daddy teased, "Ya don't wanna see under that tree, c'mon now, you're just jokin', ya don't care 'bout no presents do ya?"
She knew the child probably couldn't last long and she hurriedly got up and put on her robe and slippers. So relieved she'd thought to ask about bringing her bag.
Daryl must have gotten up really early because when she walked in the front room she smelled the coffee. Christmas music was playing softly on the radio and there was a good fire going in the stove. And here they came, both looking happy. Timmy was jumping up and down with excitement over the two packages and his Daddy smiled, "Go ahead son, the big one is from Santa, that funny shaped one is from Daddy," he paused, "An Beth."
That griped her heart, even more than when the little boy opened the crossbow and his excitement filled the room, "Bow, bow." His Daddy showed him how to shoot it and he was a little boy in heaven. He played with it for several minutes before getting to the second package. He opened it and declared it, "Twuck."
"That's right Timmy, I guess Santa knows you're a workin' man an a workin' man needs a good truck, don't he?"
The little boy was so happy and content with his two gifts and his Daddy looked almost as happy as he reached a hand over and lay it on her shoulder, "Merry Christmas Beth, we done good, he's so happy."
It was like he suddenly realized he'd touched her, he pulled his hand away quickly, stood and said, "Uh yeah, I'll go make the pancakes."
oooOOooo
Chapter 2: Chapter Two
Summary:
Chapter Text
oo00oo
Christmas Day
The fire he'd built was keeping the house so cozy but she could hear the wind still howling as the snow continued to fall. She smiled as she watched the sweet little boy so happily playing with his truck, "Santa brought you a really nice present didn't he Timmy?"
The little boy looked up at her and smiled, "Twuck."
She was amazed by how right all of this felt.
Who would have even believed it? She never would have. When she'd left Atlanta for the farm she knew the weather was going to be awful and yes, even dangerous. She'd foolishly thought she could handle it; she'd been sure that if she just took it slow it would be no problem at all. But she'd been so nervous out on the old two lane, she could feel the tension making her neck stiff and she was gripping the steering wheel so tight her hands hurt. When she'd seen the big limb laying across the road she just reacted, doing exactly what she shouldn't have done, pressing hard on the brake. The car spun out of control so quickly she didn't even know what was happening. It finally came to an abrupt stop just off the road.
She was so scared she couldn't think what to do next, so she had a good cry. She'd rested her head on the steering wheel and let the tears come, she'd think about things in just a few minutes. What she hadn't expected was a man would pull her car door open and practically demand she leave with him. Even harder to believe was she'd just done what he told her.
Something about Daryl Dixon had made her feel safe from the start. She'd watched as he quickly hacked branches off the big limb and tossed them aside, making the road passable. She knew it then, well really it was more of a feeling she had, he was that guy who would always find a way, the one you'd think of as a survivor.
What were the odds she'd end up spending such a sweet Christmas with this man she didn't even know, and a little boy who had already stolen her heart? And that all of it would somehow feel like it was exactly how it was supposed to be.
She was so touched when he'd told Timmy the gift was not just from him but from her too. That was such a nice gesture and totally unexpected. And when he'd reached over and placed his hand on her shoulder she'd been so surprised, in a very pleasant way. With these thoughts in her mind she left Timmy happily playing with his new truck and went to the kitchen.
He was laying strips of bacon in the cast iron skillet and she went right to him. She knew he'd been embarrassed when he touched her, and she wanted to somehow let him know she didn't mind the innocent contact. She lightly laid her hand on his back, but he turned quickly as though she'd struck him, "What? Sumthin' wrong?"
There was a percolator there on the range and she smiled at him nodding toward the ancient coffee pot, "May I have a cup of coffee?"
"Oh yeah, sorry I didn't ask, I ain't used ta company. Lemme get ya some." He reached up in the cabinet taking down an old diner style mug. She hadn't seen one like it in years. "There's sugar in a bowl on the table an I got fresh cream in the fridge."
He couldn't believe she'd touched him, it wasn't that it was suggestive, it wasn't like that at all. It had just been so long since he'd felt a woman's touch, and never a woman anything like her. He found himself wishing she'd have kept her hand on him a while longer.
"Wow fresh cream, what a nice treat."
"Yeah well when ya end up tradin' work ya get all kinds a good stuff but not a lotta money for the bank account." He smiled that endearing kind of half smile, "At least me an Timmy ain't gonna go hungry."
She smiled back and poured a little of the cream in her cup. She didn't normally use it but it did seem like a perfect Christmas treat.
"Can I help you with breakfast? I can make some pretty fluffy pancakes."
He chewed at his lip, "Is that right? I's just gonna get the fixins out."
"I was wondering if in all those lovely canning jars there might be apple or pumpkin? I could make something a little different, some special pancakes for Christmas morning."
She could feel him studying her but he nodded, "Yeah, Miz Horvath traded me both them, the applesauce is the real chunky kind an she said the punkin's just plain."
"Oh how nice, I could make apple pancakes if you think Timmy would eat them. And if you like I could maybe make a pumpkin pie for Christmas dinner."
He was wondering just who this woman was that he'd picked up on the highway. She seemed almost too nice, too perfect, she wasn't at all like Timmy's Mom. That woman had been just the kind of woman Dixons were used to. Not at all sweet, or nice or too perfect.
"Yeah sounds good." He came close to smiling when he said, "As long as ya don't put vegetables in them pancakes he'll eat 'em. An I dunno but I think I probably got everythin' for pie, I ain't ever tried ta make one. I know for sure Timmy an me both like it, it'd be real nice. An I even got a little sumthin' different for dinner. I fixed a washer for some folks who actually paid with cash an they even give me a small ham. It's fresh, not cured, so she told me I gotta put it in the oven 'bout lunch time."
"In the meantime that boy's gonna be comin' in here tellin' me he's starvin' any minute now." When he spoke of the child he smiled a full smile and she wished he did that more often. He looked so good when he did.
Just the day before, when she'd offered to help, he didn't think he'd care to have her in the kitchen with him. But he found he didn't mind it at all. She was pleasant and always seemed to have a smile. She definitely knew what she was doing and he liked watching her. She had such an easy way about her. Like it was all just everyday kind of stuff, no big deals. He realized that was it, she was calm and she made him feel calm. And he liked having her there.
She'd glance over at him when she could, frying up the bacon and looking as though it was almost second nature to him. Not like her Daddy or her brother Shawn, she was pretty sure they'd starve if they ever had to cook for themselves. And he certainly knew his son, just as she began pouring batter on the grill and Daryl was taking the last of the bacon from the pan, Timmy came in, "Daddy eat brefass?"
"Real soon now Shadow, we're just now gettin' it fixed for ya, ya wanna help?" The little guy nodded and Daryl handed him the platter of bacon, "Here ya be real careful an ya carry this ta the table now, k?"
"Yes Daddy." She noticed Daryl never really let go of the platter but the little boy didn't notice, he thought he'd carried it to the table all by himself. "That's a good job son, you're a real good helper." The small child beamed up at his Daddy.
She couldn't help smiling herself as she watched the man butter the pancakes for his little boy, and then cut them up into bite sized pieces. "I'ma just put a little syrup on ta start, I don't want ya gettin' all sugared up. If ya gotta have more ya tell me, k?" She admired him for the patience and care he took with the child.
He was a man who ate like he was on a mission, "The pancakes are real good Beth, ain't they good Timmy?" The smile on the little boys' face told her his answer, but his Daddy wanted more, "Whaddya say son?"
"Tank ya Bef."
And he said it as well, "Thank ya Beth."
Their simple words again warmed her heart, "Thank you both for taking me in. I'd be awfully cold and hungry right now if not for the two of you." She was thinking she'd probably be much worse off than that.
When they'd had their breakfast and all three had helped with dishes she asked, "Is it okay if I take a bath?"
She thought he looked a little embarrassed when he answered, "Yeah, yeah sure. Ya ain't gotta ask, ya just do whatever it is ya need ta."
"Thank you." She got her bag of toiletries and a change of clothes and went in the only bathroom in the house. It was large, square and as old fashioned as the rest of the house. There was a built-in dresser and a big white porcelain sink that stood on four legs, a big wooden medicine cabinet with mirror was mounted above the sink. And there was a claw foot tub. He'd installed a showerhead above the old tub and there was a shower curtain rod with a plain white curtain that wrapped completely around it.
There were two hooks on the wall. On one hook hung Timmy's pajamas, on the other a pair of men's flannel sleep pants. Something about that made her smile. It just seemed so sweet. Big man, little man.
And the big old tub was wonderful. She'd been dying to get in it ever since she'd helped with Timmy's bath the night before. But she didn't spend too long enjoying it, it was the only bathroom in the house and she didn't want to inconvenience anyone. Besides there was a pie to be made.
They were a pair, when she walked back in the living room he and Timmy were on the floor stacking wooden building blocks. They weren't building anything, they were seeing who could get the blocks stacked the highest before they fell over. Every time they all fell over it made the little guy giggle so hard, and truth was Daryl seemed to be getting just as big a kick out of it as the child.
When she came back in the living room it was all he could do not to stare. She was so pretty in such a natural way. Her hair was damp and had gone more curly with the moisture. She wore a simple pink sweater and tight blue jeans, tennis shoes on her feet and a smile on her lips. He thought she looked perfect when she asked, "Who wants to help bake a pie?" It turned out both of those boys did.
They followed her in the kitchen and that's when he realized it, it was like the whole place had taken on a different feel, a different smell. It was her, it was her fragrance, and it was as though everything was somehow softer with her there.
He hadn't even thought about the fact he didn't own a pie pan. He was disappointed thinking it was a deal breaker, but she'd smiled and shrugged a little, "Well we'll just make it in this square one. We don't care how it's shaped as long as it's good, right?"
He liked her way of thinking, "I sure don't, I'ma eat it no matter what."
They watched carefully as she made the pie crust, they seemed particularly interested in the way she floured the old wood counter and rolled out the pie dough. She lay it in the pan, and cut off the excess with a sharp knife. She cut the leftover pieces of dough into smaller pieces and placed them on a flat pan. When she had the pieces arranged she sprinkled them with sugar and cinnamon. She slipped the pan in the oven while she made the pie filling.
Never did the man and the boy stop watching her every move, both of them so curious. And he and the child were thrilled to have the small pieces of sweetened and crispy baked pie dough when she took them from the oven, and set their pie in to bake.
And then the roughhousing got underway. Daryl and his son rolled all over that living room rug, and it made her laugh the way the strong man would act as if the tiny boy was getting the best of him. And the dramatic sounds they made were so exaggerated, as though they were in one of those wrestling matches Shawn liked to watch on TV.
Her favorite part though was that he would laugh and the little boy would laugh. It all felt like so much fun and love were going on it that room. When they took a break he was still smiling, "I think me n my Shadow musta been gettin' a case a cabin fever. We ain't used ta bein' stuck in the house all day."
Supper would be early so she wasn't having lunch and he didn't either, but he fixed Timmy a small bowl of stew and a glass of milk. "Ya eat now Timmy, I know ya gotta be starvin' after beatin' up your Daddy the way ya did."
After he'd laid the little boy down for his nap he told her, "I'ma go on outside for just a few minutes. Just gonna have a quick smoke an check on things in the shop."
"I didn't know you smoked."
He softly snickered, "Used ta be a habit before Timmy, but I won't smoke in fronta him. Sometimes I still sneak one though."
He hadn't planned on asking her but as he grabbed the door handle he heard the words come out of his mouth, "Ya wanna come with me, see the shop?"
The wind had calmed some, at least the ice wasn't blowing and she thought that yes, she wouldn't mind seeing another glimpse of who this man was. She hadn't even had a chance to really see the shop the day before, everything had just been so rushed. "Yes, let me just get my coat and gloves."
The air was bitterly cold and the ground every bit as slippery as it had been. When her shoe hit that ice and she voiced a worried, "Oh dear," his reaction was to take her hand. "C'mon an be careful now, at least it ain't too far."
Even though they wore gloves she found she still liked the feel of his hand wrapped around hers. She was almost disappointed when they reached the shop and he let go to pull the big door open.
The work truck was there and water had pooled on the ground around it, where the snow and ice had melted off. There was an older lawn tractor that looked to be well-used but well-kept, and a practically vintage Jeep Wagoneer. She was guessing the vehicle was close to 40 years old and it was a sight to behold, it was almost new looking. And there were tools, lots of tools. There was also something off in a corner, covered. She was pretty sure she knew what it was, "Is that a motorcycle?"
He pursed his lips as he nodded his head once, "Yep, it's a bike, ya wanna see?"
"Sure." They walked over to it and he carefully pulled the cover off. It was beautiful, as shinny as if it was on the showroom floor. All black and polished chrome. It said it was a Triumph. "It looks brand new, do you ride it often?"
"It ain't new, I've had it close ta ten years. I used ta ride it all the time, but I also used ta be a different man livin' a different life. Since I come ta have a boy things are changed, I don't ride no more. Timmy's too little an I don't feel comfortable ridin' him. An I don't much care for other folks watchin' him so I can ride. He's mine ta care for."
She noticed he never used phrases like, "When my son was born," or, "Ever since Timmy was born." She wasn't sure why that struck her as odd, but it did. She didn't question it though, and she didn't question him about being uncomfortable leaving Timmy with someone. Some people are nervous about leaving their children in the care of others. And he hadn't mentioned other family members and no family had called to wish him and his son a Merry Christmas.
As she stood just inside the shop building, while he stood just outside of it and smoked his cigarette, she almost smiled at her thoughts. As nasty a habit as she'd always thought smoking was somehow he made it look appealing. She was thinking it was an odd feeling that the more she knew about him the less she knew, and the more curious she was to learn. And there was no denying she was feeling affection for this rough looking man she was convinced had a gentle heart.
They didn't stay out long, it was just too cold and nasty. As they walked back toward the house his hand went to her upper arm, holding it tightly but gently. The small gesture made her feel safe and also cared for. Once inside the cozy home he added a couple of small logs to the fire and told her, "I'ma take my chance while I got it an take a fast shower, Timmy's gonna be up soon."
She took the opportunity of the alone time and called her folks to wish them Merry Christmas. "Yes Mama we're all fine here. They've been very kind and it was such a nice morning. They have a little boy and it was fun to watch him open gifts. Don't worry Mama everything is good, I'm warm and safe and well-fed. I'll be home as soon as weather permits to tell you all about it. I love you Mama." She was careful not to mention to her Mother that her host was a single man with a small boy. She knew Mama well enough to know the idea of her being alone with a strange man would worry the woman.
He hadn't been out of the shower and back in the living room more than five minutes when the little boy came in the room. He was quiet, never uttering a sound as he crawled up in his Daddy's lap. Just like the day before the man held him close, stroking his hair and softly asking about his dreams and if he'd slept well, and telling him he loved him. She was convinced it was the sweetest thing she would ever see.
Their Christmas dinner was simple and delicious, there was the ham, and he'd mixed home-canned green beans with boiled new potatoes and bits of leftover bacon from that mornings' breakfast. He'd even made a cornbread. When he set it on the table he smiled, "That's the only bakin' I know, how ta make cornbread an biscuits."
She was so relieved the pie had turned out just right, and as Daryl and Timmy ate it she remembered her grandma telling her, cooking was so much more pleasurable when you cooked for people who love to eat. When he smiled and said, "Best punkin' pie I ever ate Beth, thanks for makin' it for us," she was so happy she'd thought to do it.
For her it was the company that made the meal special. She worried a little about that because she found herself becoming more and more attached to the man and the little boy. And the brief conversation they'd had in the shop was playing over in her mind. When he'd said he use to be a different man she wondered what he meant. All she knew for sure was he was an attractive and loving Daddy, and a man who seemed to feel the weight of responsibility.
Timmy again requested Frosty and Daryl looked to her, "Don't know why I even bothered recordin' Rudolph, it seems we don't care much for him round here."
She just smiled, "Maybe next Christmas."
While Timmy watched that show for what seemed to Daryl the 100th time, he kept his arm around the boy's shoulder, but he was watching her. He was surprised how much he liked having her there, and he was dreading the time she would leave. He wondered if she had a boyfriend, she hadn't called one, but still someone as sweet and pretty as her must have a guy.
Even if there was no man why would she be interested in someone like him? Living a simple and outdated way of life; that probably seemed boring to a girl who'd been living in the big city. Although she did say she hadn't cared for it there. She'd been nice and kind, all those good things, and she'd been so sweet with the boy, but hell she was trapped there, what choice did she have? And the roads would clear in a day or two and she'd be gone. She was probably counting the minutes.
Again this night she watched from the doorway as he put the child to bed. He hugged the boy and told him, "Ya sleep good now Shadow, maybe we can play outside tomorrow if the wind ain't blowin' so hard. Ya have them happy dreams for now an remember Daddy loves ya."
And she thought she might tear up when the little boy put his arms around his Daddy's neck and said, "Love Daddy." And it only got better when Timmy held his arms out to her, inviting her to hug him. She didn't waste a moment thinking about it, she just hurried over to the bed and hugged the little guy, "Goodnight Timmy."
She went in her bedroom for a minute, attempting to process these feelings she was having. The room was simple like the rest of the house. There was a double bed covered in a well-worn but cozy quilt, a dresser and a night table. A child-sized table and chair with the crayons and coloring books on it, and beside it what she was sure was a homemade toy box. There was a photo on the night table. Daryl was wearing a shirt that looked like the sleeves had been torn off, and he was holding a baby she was certain was Timmy. He was feeding him from a bottle and she was sure the smile on Daryl's face was the biggest smile he'd ever smiled.
She went in the living room where he sat watching the news. "All they got is more bad news it seems." She nodded in agreement. "Ya mind if I switch?" When she told him not at all he'd put on a nature show and they quietly watched together, but she saw he seemed nervous, chewing on his lip. She'd seen that habit crop up a couple of times.
When the program ended he turned to her, "Weather's supposed ta clear by late tomorrow night. I s'pose the next morning I'll go get your car. You'll be able ta go home." He'd already gotten used to having her there, finding he liked it real well. He didn't much care for the thought of her leaving and she hated the thought of going, but neither expressed those thoughts.
When they said goodnight in the hallway she just did it, and she would have liked for it to last longer but she thought it best to keep it brief. She put her arms around his waist, hugging him but not too tight, and lightly laying her head on his chest "Thanks so much for taking me in Daryl, I had a wonderful Christmas."
He'd been caught off guard, his hand simply cupped her elbow, and just for a moment he let his chin rest on her head. "Best Christmas I ever had for sure. Thanks." And then she moved back and they spoke no words, they just looked in each other's eyes before she quickly turned and went in Timmy's room.
Chapter 3: Chapter Three
Summary:
Chapter Text
ooo00ooo
Typically as soon as he lay down on the bed he was out like a light, but it wasn't working that way this night. Of course this wasn't just any night. His usual nights didn't include a hug from a woman.
Timmy was snugged into his side and he held an arm around the little boy. His other arm lay across his forehead while he stared up at the ceiling. Doing a lot more thinking than he wanted to do.
He was trying hard to digest it all and be honest with himself. He'd enjoyed the little bit of touching they'd done, there was no denying it. It had all been just innocent, meaningless stuff. Hadn't it? Like when she touched his back, that was just because he was standing in front of the stove and she wanted to get a cup of coffee. And the only reason he'd taken her hand when they walked to the shop, and her arm when they walked back, was just so she wouldn't slip. Just so she didn't get hurt. He was just being careful, that was all there was to all of that. Right?
But then she'd hugged him, and there was no way he could ignore how nice that felt, how good it was to have her arms around him. Everything about her was soft, warm and appealing.
He thought back to when he'd seen the car off the side of the road, remembering how he'd silently cussed it. All he'd wanted to do was get Timmy home safe. But he couldn't just drive by, possibly leave someone injured and stranded on the side of the road. In freezing temperatures. The man he was now couldn't live with himself if he did something like that.
He hadn't even thought about what might happen, he'd just gotten her in the truck and made up his mind that they were all going to get home safely. He hadn't thought about what was going to happen next. Or that she'd be there with him and Timmy. They'd all be stuck together until the weather cleared. But he didn't feel stuck now, not at all.
The brutal honesty came in when he thought about the man he used to be, he was damn sure she never would have hugged that man. Shit, a woman like Beth would have been afraid to get in a truck with that man.
The he remembered back further, to when he was a little guy in elementary school. He'd been typical of a kid that came from the type of home he was living in. He was quiet and he kept to himself. Merle did any of the fighting Merle decided needed to be done, and Merle protected him. But when his brother joined the army he was left alone to fight his own battles.
He'd quickly developed both a nasty and defensive attitude, and a very short fuse. He'd start fights with anyone who looked at him the wrong way. He remembered hearing one of his teachers tell the principal that he was "volatile." He supposed he was. And he knew plenty about how to fight and inflict pain; he'd learned that right at home. He'd been out of line a lot, a real little asshole.
He'd kept it up, the fighting, the petty theft, already smoking and drinking way too much for any man, and he was still just a kid. Somehow he managed to graduate from high school just about the time Merle came home from the Army. That's when they'd started tearing it up together, they were a team. A couple of redneck assholes was what they were. One just as bad as the other.
They participated in far more than their share of illegal activities. They'd even managed to "find" enough cash that they'd bought those damn bikes. Those damn bikes. Not that they hadn't had plenty of fun with them, they'd had all kinds of hell raising good times. That was a fact. For some of those good times he'd been so drunk he couldn't even remember if he'd had fun, and he knew how lucky he was to still be alive. It could have all ended for him so easily.
The first big change came when he was 22. Looking back it was hard to believe he'd been that young and already lived the life he had, done the things he'd done. He might still be doing all that shit, but it was about that time Merle got on the hard drugs. The crystal had been the worst. His brother was flat out addicted to that shit. Daryl just couldn't deal with him when he was on that meth high.
Unsure what to do he took himself up in the mountains for a few days. He thought hard about the life he was living, the slippery road he was heading down. He loved his brother but he didn't want to be doing the shit Merle was doing. He wanted something different. He didn't have a lot of desire for material things, that wasn't his motivation. What he was after was a life with maybe just a little meaning to it, that's all he wanted.
He took a job, an entry level job with a construction crew. He had a natural talent for building things and for making things work, and for figuring the best way to achieve the desired end result. But that wasn't really where he wanted to be either.
He wanted to learn a trade so he could strike out on his own, start a little business. So at night he went to trade school, and he learned all about two of the things people in the Deep South use and depend on all the time, heating and air conditioning. He got certified in HVAC.
One Saturday he was out just trying to blow off a little steam. He'd planned to ride his bike out into the woods, maybe do a little hiking, and maybe even shoot his bow. He had no particular plan, he was just screwing around. That's when he'd seen it, the old house.
A guy was pounding the wooden "For Sale" sign next to a broken down front gate. He didn't think about it a lot. He pulled up, turned the bike off and asked the fellow, "How much?" The price sounded too good to be true.
"Why so cheap?"
The guy shrugged a shoulder, "We had ta move my grand folks ta my Mama's place. We need ta sell this one ta help Mama get by an pay the medical bills. Ya wanna have a look? It needs a lotta work."
"Yeah, I do wanna look." It was like once the old place was built no one ever changed a thing about it, it was a step back in time. Maybe that was the part he liked the best. It did need work but he didn't mind that part, it was a kind of work he liked doing. He liked that it was out away from town, he liked the peace and quiet. He'd come to feel he needed those things in his life. It seemed like his whole life he'd been living too fast and too loud.
The trading had started with the folks he bought the cabin from. He was able to pay off a lot of what he owed them by working on the Mama's place. Everything from handicap ramps and widened doorways, to a new furnace, a new roof and repairing an old Chevy. They'd spread the word that he could fix damn near anything, that his pricing was fair and if you didn't have the money he'd trade you.
He was good with all of that, he didn't need a lot of cash. He'd had plenty of cash when he and Merle were doing what they did, back when he was the man he used to be. Now he had a new way of being and he felt happy in his new life. He had his home and his business, he had a reputation not as a redneck asshole who liked nothing more than a good fight. Now he had the reputation of being a good man. A man who could be trusted and depended on. He liked the man he was now so much better than he'd ever liked the man he used to be.
Two of his best trades were his work truck and his Jeep. He'd gotten the truck when he redid the whole HVAC system at a car dealership just outside Atlanta. The guy had traded him the lightly used truck for his labor. They'd both walked away happy with what they got.
The Jeep had belonged to Mrs. Heywood, actually it had belonged to her husband. When Mr. Heywood passed she had no idea what to do with it. But she'd heard about Daryl and she traded him the labor to repair her roof, porch and gate for the car.
It turned out that car was going to be something he needed in the next phase of his new life.
Just three months after he turned 27 years old; on a Friday night in the early spring of the year, Timmy had come to be with him. He'd suddenly become a Daddy to a two week old baby boy.
He had no idea what to do or how to do it. All he knew for sure was this sweet little baby would not know the same life he had known. This child would know love and he would know right from wrong. He'd teach this boy everything he could about how to be a good man. And he'd protect this little person from anything or anybody who ever thought to hurt him. Timmy was his little boy, his son. That little boy quickly became his life.
ooo00ooo
She lay there in Timmy's bed tired and ready for sleep, but unable to sleep. She couldn't seem to think about anything but Daryl. She couldn't believe she'd hugged him. She'd only been thinking how much she'd like to, but she hadn't really planned to act on those thoughts. Suddenly it was as though she'd been compelled. It had been a little awkward because they were both a little unsure, a little hesitant. But she could tell, she could feel it, he'd liked that brief embrace every bit as much as she had.
His body was warm and strong and solid. Even just the small touch of his hand on her elbow and the feel of his chin resting on her head, it had sent a tingle right through her. She wished he would have kissed her, any kind of little kiss.
She thought he was interested but he seemed so reluctant to touch. It wasn't that she thought he hated to be touched, but more like he was shy or uncertain what to do next. She thought it kind of odd because obviously he'd had a woman, whether she was a wife, a girlfriend or a one night stand he'd had a child with someone.
She found herself hoping the weather report was wrong, that maybe the roads wouldn't clear. Maybe she'd have to stay a while longer. She'd like to stay a lot longer.
ooo00ooo
She woke to the sounds of Daryl and Timmy in the hall. "I know ya don't wanna son, I don't wanna either at five in the mornin' but we gotta do this. We're both gonna be stinkin' n rashy if we don't." She could hear the little boy crying softly and Daryl telling him, "Daddy ain't mad at ya Shadow, not at all. Stuff like this happens, but we gotta get us an the bed cleaned up, k? Ya know Daddy loves ya, right?"
And she heard Timmy say, "Bef."
"Son, Beth can't come in the bathroom when Daddy's in there with ya, I'm sorry."
By the time he'd finished the sentence she was in her robe and slippers and in the hall with them. She saw the problem right away, Timmy's pajamas were wet and so was the side of his Daddy's sleep pants. She managed to think fast, "Timmy how about if I fold the magic washcloth for you and your Daddy can help you with it in the bathroom. Would that be okay?"
The small boy was rubbing his eye with his little fist, "K Bef."
"Alright let me do that really fast before you and Daddy freeze out here." He couldn't believe this woman and he was so grateful she was there. It had been a rough way to wake up after a rough night of very little sleep. She was definitely taking the edge off things for him.
"Okay here it is Timmy, you're ready now and everything is going to be fine. Daddy knows just what to do, okay?"
The little boy was sniffling when he said, "Yes Bef." And she didn't even think twice, she took his little face in her hands and smiled, "I'll make you breakfast while you get bathed and dressed. You'll see Timmy, it's going to be a good day."
Timmy's Daddy just watched her and he knew she was someone so special.
The first thing she did was hurry in his room and pull the bedding off the bed. She was happy to see he had a protective cover on the mattress. That saved the day. She'd walked by that closed door in the hallway a few times, this time she opened it. She was happy to discover it was a small mud and laundry room.
As she carried the soiled bedding down the hall she heard him tell Timmy, "Okay now ya do like Beth told ya Shadow, ya hold that magic washcloth over your eyes." It never failed to bring a smile to her face, the way the big rough man was so tender with the little boy.
She put the sheets in washer, washed her hands in the big utility sink, and went to the kitchen to start their breakfast.
She wasn't sure she knew exactly how to make coffee in that old percolator, she just hoped for the best. She looked around in the pantry cabinet and the fridge and decided on the leftover ham with some grits, eggs and biscuits. In the short time she'd been with them she'd learned they liked a hardy meal, especially at breakfast. Well at least Daryl did.
Just as everything was about ready they came walking in kitchen, all cleaned up and looking much happier than they had. "Everythin' looks an smells real good, but Beth ya didn't let us help. "
"Well you were busy, and hold that thought about it being good until you taste the coffee. I've never made coffee in a percolator, in fact the only one I've ever seen was in a thrift store."
He smiled at her and a quiet laugh escaped him, "Yeah I know, I ain't one ta throw out sumthin' that still works just fine." Then he got a little serious, "I seen ya took the beddin' off, ya ain't gotta do that stuff Beth."
"It was nothing, I'm happy to help. I did find the washer and I put the sheets in, and yes I see you're still getting use out of that old relic of a machine too."
He laughed again, "Yeah I know it's an old one, but it come with the place an it still washes just fine."
He got a more serious look as he lightly touched her upper arm with an open hand, "Thanks Beth, I appreciate it. He ain't done that in long time, caught us both by surprise. Now what can I do ta help ya?"
She softly smiled at him, "You can eat and then you two can do the dishes while I get a bath."
"Ya got ya a deal. Ain't that right Shadow?" The little boy answered, "Yes Daddy." And now Daryl looked at her and shrugged, "Timmy's my 'yes' man."
ooo00ooo
After her bath she walked in the living room and the sight of them almost made her laugh out loud. They had the blocks stacked and they were both lying on the floor on their tummies, about four feet away from the stack. They were taking turns with the little crossbow trying to shoot the blocks over. It was hard to know which of them was having the most fun.
She walked to the window and looked out at all the snow, it was so peaceful. She turned to them, "The wind isn't blowing anymore, we should build a snowman."
Daryl jumped right up, "C'mon Timmy, let's get this cleaned up so can get outside n play. We got a snowman ta build."
They got the carrot from the fridge, a well-worn cap from the mud room, and from his rag basket an old towel for the scarf, "Ain't got any coal but I can find some rocks that oughta work."
They all bundled up and they were out the door. She couldn't remember ever having more fun trying to build a snowman. Daryl and Timmy were taking it so seriously, determined they would have the best snowman anyone had ever built. They found rocks for the eyes, mouth and the buttons, and their snowman really did look pretty darn perfect.
It was Beth who started it. She wasn't sure what had come over her. But while he was busy helping Timmy put those rock "buttons" on the snowman, she'd made herself a little arsenal of snowballs. The minute Daryl stood up straight she took aim, and her aim was true. She'd caught him right in the chest and completely by surprise. He laughed then tried to sound tough, "Ya want war do ya? Well ya got it!"
They were throwing snowballs at each other, and tiny soft ones at Timmy, and Timmy was just picking up handfuls of snow and trying to hit them with it.
She got Daryl square in the face with a good one, and he yelled, "That's it, you're done girl!" He'd run to her and grabbed her, so that his arms were around hers and she couldn't move. They lost their balance and tumbled into the soft snow. They were rolling around having their own little wrestling match and laughing real hard. Suddenly she was on her back and he was above her, and they stopped laughing as he looked deeply into her eyes. His gloved hand slowly went to her face, lightly brushing away the snow. "Ya okay? I didn't hurt ya did I?" He was taking in every bit of her pretty face.
She didn't speak, she didn't know if she could. She just shook her head "no" as she looked just as deeply into his eyes.
He wanted to kiss her so badly and she wanted to be kissed just as much. But they were both still so unsure of each other and what they were supposed to do next. And Timmy was there and so what they settled for was that long hard stare.
They were having those thoughts when Timmy threw himself into the pile. They all rolled in the snow together laughing, and getting out all the energy they seemed to have stored up while being stuck inside for two days. And for Daryl and Beth it helped to relieve just a little of that special kind of tension that was building between them.
They went in the back door and took their wet clothes off in the mudroom, still laughing about the fun they'd had. "Here I's thinkin' ya was a real nice gal Beth, I had no idea ya had a violent streak in ya."
She looked at him with a decidedly serious expression, "There's quite a bit you don't know about me Mister Dixon." Again they looked hard in each-other's eyes.
While he was getting Timmy's coat, hat, boots and gloves off she put the sheets in the dryer and the blanket in the wash. Casually mentioning, "When I was looking in the pantry for the grits I came across a real pretty jar, all decorated. The tag said 'Merry Christmas Daryl, Love from Karen.' It's hot cocoa mix, do you think it would be fun if we all had some, you know, to warm up?"
Even as lame as he thought he was about women he knew what she was really asking, and he wanted her to know the answer. "Yeah that sounds real good, Timmy would love that. Karen's a real nice lady. She lives in town with her man, Tyrese. I just built a shed for 'em."
"Oh. Okay good then. I'll go make the cocoa."
As they sat at the kitchen table sipping their nice warm drinks she mentioned, "Another thing I saw in your pantry was molasses. If you like we could make molasses cookies."
"You're just full a good ideas Beth, them are one my favorites. Ya think we got time before Timmy's nap?"
"I think we should wait until after Timmy naps, we don't want to rush or mess up his schedule. Besides I have to try and remember the recipe, it's been a while since I've made them."
"We could google it." She looked at him, curious and he shrugged, "Told ya we ain't completely backwards out here, I got a laptop."
"I didn't think for a minute you were backwards Daryl."
He smiled that crooked little half smile of his, it was something she was sure she would never tire of seeing. "C'mon, I'll show ya." She liked the way he very lightly put his hand on her low back, as though he was gently guiding her toward the desk. The gesture felt both protective and affectionate.
He rolled open the top of the old desk and it made her smile, it was his mini technology center. There was a laptop, a small printer and a cell phone charger.
He started the laptop, and his hand rested lightly on her shoulder as he told her, "I got WiFi with the satellite an it's usually pretty good." He flipped the printer on, "Ya can print out the recipe if ya wanna. I still got paper, we didn't use it all makin' snowflakes." He smiled at his small joke.
"While you're doin' that I'ma get the sheets outta the dryer and the blanket in, then I'ma go get Timmy his lunch, what can I get ya?"
"I still feel full from breakfast, maybe I'll hold off until dinner. And if we bake cookies I'm going to have to try one. I think its cookie baking rule number 101."
"Sounds right ta me. I'll go see ta Timmy."
She found a recipe she thought was nearly the same as her grandma's and had just printed it out when they came in from the kitchen. "Alright Timmy ya get a little treat, ya get ta watch a cartoon while Daddy puts the sheets back on the bed."
When he had the show on for Timmy she volunteered, "Let me help you, it goes so much faster with two."
"Ya don't gotta Beth."
"I know I don't but I want to help."
And it did go faster and he really did appreciate the help, and as they worked from somewhere he got the words to tell her what he felt, "You're a real nice lady Beth. I appreciate everythin' ya done here. Ya been so good ta us."
"I was thinking it was you who'd been real good to me. I've enjoyed this time with you and Timmy very much." Neither of them seemed to know what to say after that, they just went back to their work.
Back in the living room he told the little boy, "Alright c'mon now Shadow, after ya have ya a little rest we get ta make cookies, ain't that right Beth?"
"It sure is and I can't wait." And she couldn't believe when the little boy walked over and put his arms around her leg in a kind of hug, "Bef." She bent down picking him up and she held him to her for a minute, "You have a good rest now Timmy I'll see you very soon, and we'll have more fun." She gave him a kiss on the cheek, and all the while his Daddy looked on amazed by the love and kindness she showed his child. Maybe even more than that he was surprised by how attached his son had become to this woman.
ooo00ooo
After his nap, when Timmy's Daddy had loved him fully awake, they all went in the kitchen to bake their cookies.
Again they watched so closely and she followed Daryl's style, explaining step by step everything she did. She was happy to have Daryl's help stirring that stiff cookie dough. She let Timmy hold the fork and she held her hand around his tiny one, guiding him as he made little crosshatch patterns on the dropped dough. She looked at the little guy, "You did that just perfectly, I know for sure now these cookies are going to be delicious. I can hardly wait to taste one." He looked so proud of himself.
Daryl put the cookie sheet in the oven and spoke to her in a low voice, "Thanks again for treatin' my boy so nice, an me too."
"Well Daryl it's what people do when they care about someone, I care about both of you very much." They each turned a little pink and it wasn't from the heat of the oven. But she didn't regret saying it at all, she wanted to let him know how she felt.
He was having trouble believing what he'd heard her say was real. He'd never had a woman say she cared for him and mean it. Not just saying it because she was drunk in some bar with him and planning to give herself up for the night. Beth, wasn't that kind of woman at all.
ooo00ooo
That evening after dinner they all sat to watch a little TV before Timmy went to bed. Daryl sat next to Timmy on the couch just like he always did. Beth didn't sit in the chair like she'd been doing. She sat on the couch too, on the other side of Timmy. His Daddy told him, "Ya get ta watch a little extra tonight Shadow, ya had a bath this mornin' an I ain't gonna make ya take another. But I'ma pick the show, k?"
"Yes Daddy."
He put on a program called Nature: The Animals of Winter. There were penguins, polar beers and bison and she was surprised how much she and Timmy both enjoyed it. But what she enjoyed even more was the three of them sitting together on the couch, Daryl with his arm around Timmy and every once in the while looking over at her and smiling.
She followed them to the bathroom and waited in the hall while Timmy brushed his teeth and went potty, and then she followed them in the bedroom. She didn't wait in the doorway, she went right in and stood by the bed next to Daryl. He tucked the little boy in, bent down and kissed him telling him like he did every night, to have good dreams and remember that his Daddy loves him.
And just like the night before the child held his arms out to Beth, she bent down and hugged him close, "Goodnight sweet Timmy, you're the best little boy ever. You sleep tight now."
She and Daryl sat on the sofa and he asked, "Anything special ya wanna watch?" He was exhausted from his nearly sleepless night. When he'd finally fallen into a deep sleep Timmy had his accident and the day started early and a little dramatically.
"I'm sure whatever you pick will be just fine with me." She was so tired she really didn't care anyway.
He put on another nature show, a BBC program about the world's oceans. It wasn't long before Daryl and Beth were both asleep on the couch.
He woke up disoriented. Then he felt it, that weight on his arm and shoulder. He knew right away what it was. Without moving he looked down and saw the blond hair spread across his chest. He felt the warmth of her and smelled her delicate natural fragrance. He wasn't typically an impulsive man, but this night was different. His arm tightened around her, gently pulling her closer into his side. His other hand went to her hair and he softly ran his fingers through the blond curls. He bent down and kissed her forehead and she let out a soft sigh. He knew he should wake her, they should go to bed. But first he was going to enjoy having her in his arms for just a few more minutes.
Chapter 4: Chapter 4
Summary:
Chapter Text
ooo00ooo
She sighed again, more deeply this time as she stretched and her arm wrapped around him, her hand coming to rest on his shoulder. It must have been the feel of him that made her slowly began to wake. Her awareness of the situation came as they locked eyes.
Instinct made her pull away a little, "I'm, uh, um, I'm sorry."
"Don't be it was fine, it was all good. I didn't wanna wake ya."
She felt the color rise up on her cheeks and she was still a little disoriented. "Well now that I'm awake I should probably get up and get myself to bed."
"Yeah I guess."
They were both disappointed but she didn't know quite what to do, it was just all so confusing. It seemed to be going so quickly, whatever this thing was that was happening between them. She'd only been there three days, 72 hours. But somehow it felt like she'd known Daryl longer, like he'd been in her heart a very long time.
And when she thought about the amount of real time they'd spent together in these few days, all of them in the old house, it seemed like so much more than just three days. Cooking together, eating together, being together. They were almost like a family. A family that just needed to learn a little more about each other, to discover if whatever this seemed to be turning into was real.
He wasn't at all the sort of man she'd ever have believed she'd be attracted to. Aside from his looks, there was no denying that attraction. But never in her wildest imagination had she imagined herself having this powerful attraction to a man anything like Daryl. She didn't even know there could be a man like Daryl, living this kind of backwoods lifestyle from 50 or 60 years ago. Probably longer. He seemed quite content in his role as jack of all trades, he appeared to have no great concern for money or material things. And Daryl was already a Daddy to a small boy.
She still knew nothing about that circumstance. Where was Timmy's mother? Why hadn't she visited or even called her son for Christmas? It was weird. All she knew for sure was Daryl loved that little boy. She was so curious to find out just what that part of his story was all about. She was anxious to know everything about him.
There was also the deep sadness she was feeling. He'd told her in the morning he'd be going after her car. She'd have to go home. She wasn't ready. She wasn't sure when she'd be ready. Maybe she'd never be ready.
It was another fitful night of little sleep.
He was wishing she hadn't woken up, at least not then. He liked the way her arm had wrapped around him, he didn't want her to move. It felt so natural to have her there, it was the feeling that's where she belonged, there in his arms.
He wondered why he was even having those thoughts. Sure she was really pretty, and really sweet and she had a beautiful smile, and there were those eyes. A man really could fall right into those eyes. But he barely knew her. She definitely wasn't the sort of woman he'd ever had anything to do with, or the type of woman that would have anything to do with a man like him. She was too good. And it was so strange this feeling he had, kind of like he'd known her all along time, like she'd somehow always been there with him, somewhere in his heart.
And it wasn't just him, he could plainly see she already had Timmy's heart, and it seemed maybe Timmy had her heart too. How was he going to let her go now? He wasn't quite ready. He didn't know if he'd ever be ready.
But he couldn't just keep her she wasn't a prisoner or a possession. She wanted to go home and he had to let her. And just why was he worrying and wondering how they'd get along without her? They'd been doing just fine on their own. The trouble was now they knew how much nicer, how much better it was with her there.
As much as he didn't want to he'd go get her car tomorrow, tow it home and make sure it was safe for her to drive. He figured it was likely once she got back to her family's place she'd send him and Timmy some kind of little thank you card. Women like her did that sort of thing. Once she did she'd probably forget about them. He felt pretty sure he and Timmy weren't really her kind of people.
He was tired but he couldn't seem to rest, his mind wouldn't shut down. He held the little boy close to him, seeking comfort in the small child and wishing he could quit thinking about what tomorrow was going to bring.
ooo00ooo
It was early, really early. She didn't even have to check her watch to know that. When she did she saw it was only four. It was quiet, she couldn't hear him and Timmy but she smelled the coffee. She wondered if he'd had the same kind of sleepless night she had.
She got her slippers and robe on and found him in the kitchen, sitting at the table sipping coffee. He looked up with the half smile that got her every time, "Sorry, did I wake ya?"
"No it was the smell of the coffee but honestly I wasn't really sleeping that well." As soon as she sat down he stood to get her a cup. And he poured cream in it. She didn't bother to tell him she didn't really take cream, that had only been that once, that it was a Christmas treat. Rather than mention it she just appreciated his thoughtfulness and that he'd remembered.
"Yeah, me either. Listen uh, I's gonna ask ya. I didn't know I had my phone on silent, an I seen when I checked this mornin' I had a message from Miz Heywood. She asked could I come by just after noontime an get some firewood in for her. I'm s'posed ta be off but I don't like sayin' no ta elderly folks. 'Specially with this bad weather. Thing is, it's not far from where your car's at. I's wonderin' if ya mind if I wait an get the car when I'm comin' back from her place. I shouldn't be long."
All she could really think about was it bought them a few more hours together. "Of course I don't mind Daryl, not at all. I've only got twenty miles to drive home."
"Yeah that ain't bad then, but I'ma be checkin' your car over good 'fore ya leave, make sure everythin's alright."
"I appreciate it Daryl. And I'm so grateful you stopped for me and that you brought me to your home. I've really loved being here with you and Timmy."
"We was lucky ta have ya here Beth, ya make everythin' real special." She saw his neck flush and she could swear she felt her own doing the same.
Mama would be so ashamed of her; she'd been raised better than that. You just don't ask people those kinds of questions, you don't pry into other people's business and take a chance of embarrassing them. And she thoroughly embarrassed herself when the words came out of her mouth. But then you can't unsay something, can you? So there it was, she'd asked it, "Does Timmy's Mama ever come visit him?"
He looked in her eyes but he didn't look especially sad as he answered, "Nah, she's dead. She died when he was still real tiny."
"Oh I'm so sorry for your loss, for Timmy's loss. And I apologize Daryl I never should have asked you that, it's none of my business. I'm really so sorry."
"Ya ain't gotta be sorry, I'd wonder why the little fella's Mama never come ta see him too. Thing is I didn't really know her very well."
Now she had more questions than answers and she had no idea how to respond to that, so she just got up from her chair and said, "Why don't I start breakfast, Timmy will be getting up soon."
"Ya ain't gotta Beth, I can do it."
"I know Daryl but it's my last morning here and I'd like to do this for you and Timmy, please."
"That's real nice, I just ain't use ta havin' someone do for me. Ya sure I can't help? I feel like I should be helpin'."
She smiled that pretty smile he already felt so attached to, "Timmy's going to be waking up soon and he's going to need his Daddy to be giving him love."
It was her, she'd caused him to do it. It was so unlike him, something he'd never done and it seemed so intimate, so personal. Maybe it was because it was all about feeling affection and attraction and caring, all the feelings he'd never experienced with the women he'd known. This seemingly small gesture held all kinds of feelings. He put his hand gently on the back of her head, drew her close to his chest and held her there next to him. In a low sort of raspy whisper he told her, "I never have known a women like ya, you're real special Beth."
And just like that he'd left the kitchen and left her wondering. She would have liked for him to hold her for so much longer, and to have whispered so much more to her.
After their brief, spontaneous caress, so unplanned and so unexpected, she thought breakfast might have a little different atmosphere. Maybe it would feel more awkward, or maybe it would have a new feeling of closeness. But everything seemed to have fallen back into their usual routine. That man and his son both ate their biscuits and gravy like they'd been starved for days. And although the mood was certainly pleasant and friendly, she would have liked something more.
"Thank ya for a real nice meal Beth. Biscuits an gravy is my favorite. Ya do whatever now, me an my Shadow's gonna clean the kitchen, then we got some work outside. We gotta see about the yard, this meltin' snow is gonna make a mess a things."
She took her bath and then stripped Timmy's bedding, she wanted to leave everything clean for them. Once the sheets were in the washer she cleaned the little room that didn't really need much cleaning, and the living room that didn't need it much either.
When she put the sheets in the dryer she thought, why not do this for them? And she started his and Timmy's wash, and then she cleaned the bathroom. She wasn't going to go in his room, that seemed too intrusive, and she didn't actually go in. But curiosity made her peek. The bed was made and the room was clean and tidy.
The man had his ways and she knew he was trying to show Timmy how things should be done. It seemed almost as if he was following a guidebook of how things ought to be and passing that onto Timmy, making sure the little boy learned those things. It was like he just wanted so much to do everything the right way with his son. He seemed afraid to make a mistake, to mess this up. One thing was for sure though, that was the love he had for the little boy. It was so wonderful to see the affection between the two.
She couldn't help but wonder about his relationship with Timmy's Mama. It sounded like it must have been a very casual encounter, maybe even a one night stand. She wondered if she'd ever get to know the whole story.
She was keeping herself as busy as possible, desperately trying to keep her mind off the fact she'd be leaving later in the day. That included packing her bag. She thanked God again she'd thought to bring it. She would have hated not having a change of clothes and a few of her own things these past few days. But packing to go felt like the worst part, it seemed so final.
She called her Mother, "Hi Mama the weather has finally cleared up enough that I'll be home this afternoon. Yes, yes the man is going to go after lunch and get my car. It's off the road so he plans to tow it here and check it over real good. Yes Mama you're right they are, they're really, really nice. I'm so grateful they rescued me and I've had such a good time with this family, they're wonderful people. I love you too Mama, I'll see you late this afternoon. Give Daddy my love."
He and Timmy had swept down the porch and steps, and they did their best to shovel and create a snow and mud free path to the shop, and then he started on the work truck. He first checked to see how everything had weathered the storm. He and Timmy cleaned the interior and then he told the little boy, "I'ma wash it in the yard but this time you're waitin' inside, either in the truck or the in house. It's just gonna get too muddy Shadow, no use for us both ta be a mess, K?"
"Yes Daddy."
It made Daryl smile but also kind of fear the day his son might say, "No Daddy, no way."
"Alright then, house or truck?"
"Twuck."
She watched out the window as Daryl pulled the truck to the side of the house and began to wash it. Timmy was in the cab and he was laughing so hard while his Daddy took aim with the hose, running around the vehicle and squirting the windows like he was trying to squirt the little boy, yelling, "Be careful now Shadow, don't ya get wet!" And then Daryl made a really big deal out of soaping those windows up, suds were everywhere. She thought little Timmy might get sick to his stomach he was laughing so hard. It was all so fun and funny and so sweet. She was going to miss this and them so much.
He was doing everything he could think to stay busy, trying to take his mind off her leaving. And he had another kind of sadness that was going to be coming right along with that, Timmy. He knew his son had already grown attached to her, how the hell was he going to explain why she was leaving? He could already imagine the tears and he didn't know if he could stand seeing the little guy so heartbroken, especially not when he was bearing the weight of his own sadness at her leaving.
By the time the truck was washed and he'd attached the tow bar to the bumper, Timmy was talking about being hungry and yawning for a nap. "C'mon Shadow we best get ya in an fed 'fore ya fall asleep on the job."
They were both wet and dirty so they went in through the mud room, removing jackets, hats and boots, and washing up in the big utility sink.
They walked in the kitchen and he was surprised to see she already had lunch waiting for them on the table. "Beth you're ruinin' us, I told ya we ain't use ta bein' so well cared for an now we're spoiled. Ain't gonna be the same at all when you're gone."
His words gave her kind of a thrill, "I'm going to miss it too. It's been so nice here with you, both of you. I hate to leave." There, she'd said it, she hoped it left no doubt. He'd responded with that look of his and a nod of his head. But that was all, just that acknowledgement. She hoped when the time came at the very least he'd ask for her phone number.
When lunch was done he stood, "I'ma go ahead n clean this up, then Shadow an me can go on ta Miz Heywood's."
"What about Timmy's nap?"
"He'll catch one in the truck."
"I know you said you don't like to leave him but if you feel like you can trust me, I'd be happy to keep him here. I'm going to be here anyway and wouldn't it be better if he napped in bed?"
It hadn't even occurred to him, he'd always been the only one looking out for Timmy. He'd had people offer to watch the little boy if he needed someone, but he felt apprehensive about anyone besides him caring for Timmy. But he'd seen Beth with his son and she definitely had a way with him, and just as important, he knew Timmy loved her.
"Ya sure Beth? He's mine ta care for an I ain't never left him with anyone."
"I know Daryl but we'll be fine I promise. It's not a bit of trouble for me, he'll be napping anyway and he'll get a much better nap in bed than in the truck."
"K, thanks, oh lemme give ya my cell number just in case. Ya call me right away if ya got any kinda trouble, even if he's just bein' naughty or sumthin'."
She couldn't help it that little laugh just came out, "Daryl please I can handle this and if he gets naughty I'll handle that too."
"I don't never hit him though k?"
She should have been offended that he'd even think to say that to her but there was something, a feeling she got as he spoke those words like it wasn't personal or really even directed at her. She couldn't exactly put her finger on it but she didn't feel angry like she might have. "Daryl I would never take it upon myself to hit your child. Even if you wanted me to I couldn't. Please go now and try not to worry about us."
"I'm sorry Beth, that was wrong. I know ya ain't like that. It's just I never have left him."
He picked the little boy up and hugged him like he might never see him again, "Daddy's gotta go help out Miz Heywood an I gotta get Beth's car. Ya get ta stay here with her while I'm gone. Ya be real good an ya do like Beth tells ya, k?"
"K Daddy."
He kissed the little boy and then he leaned over and kissed her cheek, "I'll see y'all soon, I won't be gone long."
She was so surprised she could barely say, "Okay, we'll see you soon."
He went out through the mud room getting his boots and coat back on, and kind of smiling. He'd surprised himself but he was glad he did, it felt right to kiss both of them goodbye. He was only wishing he would have just gone ahead and kissed her lips.
She'd been a little nervous that when she laid Timmy down for his nap he'd cry for his Daddy. She'd just try to handle whatever happened. She took him potty, took his slippers off and laid him in Daryl's bed, covering him with the big quilt and kissing his sweet little cheek. She sat down by him and began to tell him a story. He didn't last long, he was out halfway through her tale.
She went in the laundry room to put the last load in the dryer and she saw it, Daryl's cellphone lying on the small folding table. Well he wouldn't be calling but she didn't feel worried, he was just gone for a short time and she was sure she wouldn't have a reason to call him.
She was tired from another sleepless and a very early wake up, so she took a book from the shelf and sat in the big chair. She read for a while and then she must have dosed off, she woke to Timmy wordlessly crawling up in her lap. She smiled, happy to know he felt this comfortable with her. She did what she'd seen his Daddy do with him. She ran her fingers through his curls and asked him if he'd had a good rest, if he'd had good dreams and she told him he was the best little boy in the whole world and that she loved him, and she meant those words. And then she kissed his curly little head.
After a few minutes he came awake like she'd seen him do and smiled, "Twuck?"
"You want to play with your truck Timmy?"
"Pwease twuck?"
"Sure we can play with the truck." And she tried very hard to play with him the way his Daddy did. She'd never been a little boy but she'd been staying with two people, both of whom she'd seen act like little boys. She smiled at the thought.
The drive seemed kind of lonely without his Shadow beside him but he did think Beth was right. The little guy was better off having a real nap in a real bed. As long as he was with Beth Daryl felt okay, he wouldn't trust anyone else with Timmy.
He got to Mrs. Heywood's and that was the first question she asked, "Daryl where's your Shadow? I made butter cookies for him."
"That's real nice a ya Miz Heywood. He's havin' his nap right now, a friend a mine is keepin' an eye on him."
"Oh how nice." She wondered but it wasn't her business to ask, Daryl never left the boy. Ever.
He repaired a couple of spots on the coups chicken wire, nailed down some loose boards on the front porch and carried in several armloads of wood and stacked them. "Now ya got all this firewood we're probably gonna have us a heat wave. How's that furnace? Still workin' okay?"
"Yes. I know ya saved my life when ya come the other day, I thank ya again."
"I think I owe ya one Miz Heywood, it turned out ta be a real good day for me."
He left with a cardboard box that held three dozen eggs, two loaves of homemade bread, two pints of peach jam and a tin of butter cookies.
Beth's car had gone off the road quite a bit further than he remembered. Now that he saw the steep slope he knew how lucky it was the car hadn't slid down. He shuddered thinking what could have happened to her. He'd been in such a hurry when he'd stopped to help and so anxious to get out of there, he hadn't really paid close attention.
The first thing he thought to do was take a walk around the vehicle, looking under it to make sure there wasn't any kind of noticeable damage, no oil or other fluids leaking, no tires going flat. He was back near the trunk when it happened; the heel of his boot hit a patch of ice. It must have been from moisture dripping off the car and then freezing on the ground during the night. But then it really didn't matter where it came from, what mattered was he lost his footing and he began to slide down that very steep hill.
At first it almost seemed to be happening in slow motion as he tried grabbing at anything to help stop his momentum. But he ended up going all the way down, and fast, an out of control ride down that jagged shale and Georgia clay. He could feel the effects right away, in his shoulder and especially in his left leg. But he didn't think either was broken, that was the good news. It wasn't all good though, he had some bad cuts and scrapping, his legs and arms were bleeding, even his stomach. And he could feel his back was bleeding too, his shirt was getting wet.
He dug around for his cell phone; maybe he could get ahold of Tyrese or someone to come help him out. He didn't like to call on others but it seemed like the smart thing to do right now. He couldn't find it, it wasn't in any of his pockets. He laid his head back for just a minute thinkin'.
She and Timmy had played with the truck until he tired of it, then they'd colored and she had him pick his favorite picture. She took the liberty of rolling up the top on Daryl's desk to get the tape, and she had Timmy help her hang his artwork on the fridge. She smiled until it hurt at how excited he got and the way he clapped for himself.
By four she was getting worried, but not too worried.
He'd thawed a chicken for their dinner and she thought she'd better get it in the oven for him. The little guy would be hungry before too long, and she was sure Daryl would be hungry by the time he got home.
There was only one thing for him to do and that was get back up that hill, it wasn't as easy as it sounded. It was naturally slippery and there was little to grab onto, he made several failed attempts. He'd get a quarter or halfway up when damn if he didn't slide back down. He was making no progress and getting weaker with each try, and his body was becoming more and more battered.
At one point he'd taken a particularly bad slide and he was wondering if he had it in him to even try again. That's when he swore he heard Merle, "What's the matter, Darylina? That all ya got in ya? Throw away that purse an climb. C'mon, don't be like that. I'm on your side."
And he felt like he wanted to respond, "Yeah? Since when?"
And Merle coming back at him, "Hell, since the day ya was born, baby brother. Somebody had ta look after your worthless ass."
And him back at Merle, "Ya never took care a me. Ya talk a big game but ya was never there. Hell, ya ain't here now."
Maybe that conversation was all made up in his mind but it lit a fire in him, he was getting up that fucking hill if it was the last damn thing he ever did. He had a boy that needed him, he was all that boy had. And he wanted to see her again. He had to see them both, he needed to get home to them. That's what finally powered him up that hill. That and proving a little something to Merle.
By 4:30 she'd started to think that even if he got home soon, by the time he checked her car it was going to be too dark for her to drive. She was afraid as soon as what little sun there was went down things would be iced over again. She wasn't sure what to do.
At five she called her Mother back, "I'm sorry Mama there's just a small problem with my car, the man is working on it now. I just don't want to take the chance of driving alone at night. I'm sorry to disappoint you Mama but it doesn't seem like a good idea. No, oh gosh no, I don't want Daddy coming after me, there's no reason he should be out in the dark and cold." She tried to add a little humor, as much for herself as her Mother. "I'm disappointed too Mama, but let's think about the fact I don't even have a job, you're probably going to get sick and tired of having me around by the time I find one."
She hated lying to her Mama but there was no sense in letting the poor woman worry. She was worried enough for everyone.
By 5:30 she knew she couldn't hold Timmy off any longer, the little guy was hungry. She sat down for dinner with him but she mostly just moved her food around, she was feeling so nervous and getting more and more concerned.
It was well passed dark when he was finally successful getting back to the truck. There wasn't a part of him that didn't hurt, that didn't feel beaten, bruised, cut, scraped or all of the above. He was trying to hold onto something positive for strength, all he came up with was he'd made it up the hill and he didn't think anything was broken.
He decided he'd try to get through one more thing. The truck was in position, the tow bar was on it, he'd rigged her bumper. Might as well. He dug out the big flashlight and he got the little car hooked on. But by the time he'd gotten himself up in the driver's seat of the work truck he was completely spent. He thought he'd close his eyes for just a minute, then he'd be okay.
When he opened them again the clock on the dash said ten o'clock. He was weak, cold and hungry and every part of him hurt. But he told himself he only had two miles, he could make two miles.
She'd kept with the routine because that seemed best. She didn't want Timmy to think anything was wrong. She had him help her with the dishes and then they sat to watch TV. "What would you like to watch Timmy?"
"Fwosty." It made her smile and she needed that, and she didn't mind watching it again at all. She put her arm around the little boy and held him close while it played. Wishing hard that his Daddy would hurry home.
He was brave for his bath and she told him that as she put him in his pajamas and helped him brush his teeth. She gave him a story book to look at while she put her own pajamas on and brushed her teeth.
She was getting ready to help him up in his Daddy's bed when he shrugged his little shoulders in that way, just like his Daddy did, and looked at her with those blue eyes, "Daddy where?" She could feel her own eyes get moist, she couldn't very well tell him she wished she knew. "He'll be home real soon Timmy. Daddy had to work, but its' okay, I'm going to take care of you until he gets here, okay?"
"K Bef."
She'd only meant to lay in the bed with him until he feel asleep, but it was somehow just so comforting to be holding onto the little boy. She was scared, worried about Daryl but she kept telling herself he was a survivor. She'd had that feeling since she'd watched him hack the branches off that tree in the road. She just knew he'd come home to them. She just knew he would, she prayed he would and soon. She relaxed, taking comfort in the scent of Daryl on the bed pillow and the feel of the small boy wrapped in her arms. Finally she slept.
She heard something, it had woken her and she was scared. Moonlight was streaming in the bedroom window and she saw a figure in the doorway. She was half asleep and so confused and frightened, and then he spoke, "Beth…" And she watched him slowly slide down the wall before collapsing to the floor.
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Chapter 5: Chapter 5
Summary:
Chapter Text
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Before she was even fully awake she was out of bed and rushing to Daryl. She fell to her knees beside him but she was hesitant to touch him. He looked so badly hurt and she didn't want to risk adding to his injuries. She had no idea what may have happened but it looked like he'd been beaten, or that maybe he'd been hit by something. Maybe a car.
She could feel the tears but she didn't want to cry, she wanted to be strong, she had to be. She'd wait and fall apart later when she was sure he was okay. She gingerly stroked her hand along the side of his face, trying to sound calm as she quietly asked, "Daryl, Daryl what happened? Please talk to me." She was panicked but trying very hard to control her emotions.
She barely heard it, his already raspy voice was so low, "Got hurt." That seemed to be the understatement of the century.
"Do you think you can get up? I can help you. We should get you to the bed so I can see how bad it is."
"Can't scare Shadow." His voice was so faint it added to her fears.
"He's fine, he's in your bed and sound asleep. Let's see if we can get you to his room." She struggled as she helped him, but finally with the two of them working together he got to his feet. With him half leaning against her they were able to make it the short distance to Timmy's room.
It was when she turned on the light she saw how bad it really was. His clothes were practically in shreds and there was blood everywhere. She took a deep breath and tried very hard to sound matter-of-fact when she told him, "I'm going to clean you up a little so I can decide if I need to get you to the hospital."
"Ain't goin' ta no hospital dammit, ain't leavin' here. I'ma be fine ain't nuthin' broke." As weak as he was, as thin as his voice was, he still managed to sound so tough and determined, and quite ornery. She didn't want to argue with him, not yet anyway. First she'd check the wounds and see what she thought. Then if need be they'd find out which of them could be the most stubborn.
She couldn't help but touch him, she'd been so scared and worried about him earlier, and now that he'd finally come home he looked so badly injured and so drained. He didn't look at all like the rough and strong man she'd gotten to know. She softly ran a hand through his long hair, carefully moving it away from his face. "Do you have any first aid supplies Daryl?"
His eyes were closed and she thought he might be sleeping, but again in the low voice he replied, "Bathroom. Dresser. Top drawer. Timmy can't reach 'em." His words brought a lump to her throat, the way he always had that sweet little boy on his mind.
She rushed to the kitchen first and got a big pot, then to the laundry room and the rag basket. She knew the rags were clean and she grabbed some of the old washcloths and hand towels from the basket. Then in the bathroom she filled the pot with hot water, and searched the drawer for first aid supplies.
It seemed he had everything he might need and that made sense to her. Living out from town the way he did and having a young child who might get hurt, he was being smart. And there was him, he looked like the kind of man who may have had his share of cuts and scrapes. And in the short time she'd known him she'd learned he was also the kind of man who was prepared. Prepared to take care of himself and Timmy no matter what, and without the help of others.
He may be all of those things but she had every intention of helping him in any way she could.
There were lots of things she didn't need, children's Tylenol, something for teething pain, cough syrup, throat lozenges, eyedrops and eardrops. But she also found what she did need, peroxide, rubbing alcohol, regular Band-Aids in every size, plus gauze bandages and tape. There were even Steri-Strips. There was a spray bottle of Bactine and a tube of antibiotic ointment, she took everything she thought she might need into the bedroom and set it on Timmy's little coloring table.
She hurried over to him and heard him softly snoring. She hated so much to wake him, she knew whatever had happened to him had sapped every bit of his strength and energy. Again she lightly touched his hair, moving it off his forehead. "I'm sorry Daryl but I need to take care of these wounds."
He stirred enough to weakly respond, "Don't need ta, I can. Lemme rest first."
"I'm sure you can do it." She may have spoken the words but she'd already begun her work. Fortunately his face seemed to have been pretty well spared. There were just minor cuts, except for one laceration above his eyebrow. She suspected there would be bruising soon but she also felt confident there weren't any broken bones.
He mostly slept while she worked and that was good. He needed his rest and she needed him to lay still and let her do what needed to be done.
Once she was done with his face she knew she had to remove his shirt. She leaned down close to his ear, "I'm sorry Daryl, I just need to get your shirt off." That's when he got crankier.
"Nah, I'm good. Go on now an just leave me alone."
Although he sounded mean she was going to try and humor him long enough to get this done. After all he was the injured one so she felt she should try and be patient. The shirt was so torn, the buttons all but gone, there really wasn't much to do. She fought a gasp as she carefully removed most of what was left of the blood and dirt-covered garment, and saw his injuries. His chest, arms and back were covered in ribbons of bloody gashes.
Even more disturbing than his fresh wounds were the welts across his back, they appeared to be from some long ago injuries. It looked as if he'd been whipped at some time in his life, and more than once. It made her think back to what he'd said about Christmas and why he'd never had one. She hoped what she was thinking wasn't true.
Except for the small star on his hand this was also the first time she'd seen his tattoos. It seemed there was a lot more to learn about Daryl and the life he had lived. But for now she had a job to do and she tried hard to concentrate only on that.
As she carefully pulled the last of what was left of the shirt away from his body he grumbled, "The fuck Beth, I told ya leave me alone. I can do it."
That was it for her, she'd surpassed her maximum stress level. She'd worried about him for hours and when he'd finally come home he was terribly injured, and she still didn't even know what had happened to him. To make matters worse now he was being mean, stubborn and ungrateful. She gave him a taste of that right back. "Oh I'm sure you can, you can just do anything Mister Dixon, can't you? You're like the superman jack of all trades or something. But guess what? I don't care! Now just lay still, be quiet and let me do what I need to do." She surprised herself with the harshness of her tone.
As exhausted as he was, and as much as everything hurt, he liked her attitude, she wasn't taking his shit. Still he grumbled, "Damn, didn't know ya was gonna get all badass on me girl."
"Well now you do know, so just let me do this. Please." And that's when he heard it in her voice, how upset and scared she was. He could tell she was on the verge of tears. He felt like a complete horses' ass. How could he be mean to this woman who was so kind to him and his son? The woman who was doing everything she could to care for him now.
"An now ya know sumthin' 'bout me Beth, I can be a real dick. I'm sorry."
She swallowed hard and swore if they got through this she'd get a better apology from him than that, but it would do for now. "Just lay as still as you can. I need to make sure all these cuts and scrapes are clean so you don't get an infection. And I think you might have a couple of either badly bruised or broken ribs. God only knows what else is wrong. You should probably be in the ER, so don't be mean anymore or I'll just give up and call 9-1-1."
He reached for her hand, gently wrapping his around it, "Said I's sorry an I really am, but I ain't goin' ta no hospitals. I'll lay quiet."
It took a long time for her to get all those cuts on his abdomen, arms and back cleaned, treated and when needed, bandaged. She was feeling it in her own back and the stress of the day and the stress of him being injured, all of it was making her head and neck ache. She also knew however bad he was feeling right now it would likely be far worse later. He'd be stiffening up for sure, and whatever had happened to him it appeared no part of him had been spared. She thought he'd probably have trouble just getting around for at least a couple of days. But finally she was done, at least with his upper half.
He'd been in and out for most of it, and she knew it had to hurt badly, but he'd just grit his teeth and never say a word. Hardest to believe was that he did sleep off and on. His body must be exhausted. She leaned down and quietly said, "Daryl we need to get your pants off."
He looked at her from the side of his eye, "Nah."
"Don't argue anymore, please. As bad as your upper body is, your legs had to have taken a beating too. I just want to get those wounds cleaned and cared for, please."
"Beth I'm…ah shit I'm goin' commando."
That did it. Everything that had been building up in her, the worry and the wonder and the stress, the fatigue and her own aches and pains. His words hit her just right and all that pent-up tension came out, in laughter. She just couldn't seem to stop. She guessed it was better than crying, but it was no easier to control.
"What's so damn funny?" He mumbled.
His voice was still so weak and low she could barely hear him, but she had regained a little self-control. "Nothing is funny I think I'm just coming unwound."
"It's my fault, I really fucked things up. I'm sorry, I know ya wanna go home ya ain't gotta stay an do this." Every time he spoke it seemed like such an effort, she wished he would just rest and let her take care of him.
"You can be so maddening Daryl Dixon. I'm here, I'm staying. I'm not abandoning you and I'm sure not abandoning Timmy. So just quit talking like that." Now she felt like she was on the verge of tears again, "Do you even own underwear? Or do you have pair of shorts or something, anything?"
He looked at her now feeling every bit like the asshole he knew he'd been. Things had been bad and he knew he'd made them worse. As pretty as she was she looked so tired and so stressed.
On top of everything else going on he was feeling so confused about her. He knew he didn't want her to leave, he knew he'd been mean and he was angry at himself for that. He trusted her and that was something new for him. He wished that somehow maybe they could be more to each other. What he had no idea of was what he should do about any of it. But he knew what he shouldn't do. He shouldn't be so damn mean, and he sure as hell shouldn't hurt her in any way.
There was the added frustration of feeling that he should be the one caring for her, he didn't want her to have to take care of him.
He wasn't sure where it came from, it wasn't like him at all, but he took her hand in his, "I ain't been nice an I know it. I care about ya too much ta be treatin' ya the way I have. I got the biggest urge ta hug ya Beth an tell ya how sorry I am, but I don't think I can get up ta do that."
She was taken aback by what he said, it was so unexpected. She did want to hear those words from him, but she'd hoped to hear them under much different circumstances. She couldn't keep from smiling at the man who was making her so angry and so happy at the same time, "I'll tell you what, you tell me where I can find something for you to cover up with. Then you let me finish taking care of you, and be nice while I do that. Then I'll give you a real serious hug and you can tell me how sorry you are. How's that?"
In that ever weakening voice, but still trying to sound far more pleasant than he had, he told her, "Okay then let's get er done. In the dresser, my room, top draw, I got a couple pair a boxers. Best get a pair a sleep pants an a t-shirt for when you're done, please. All these cuts an bruises gonna scare Timmy. An Beth, there's a bottle a Jack under a t-shirt ta the back a the drawer, bring that too, please."
She knew he'd had it and she was exhausted too, she was hoping to maybe get a couple of hours sleep before Timmy woke up. So she rushed to get the boxers, his sleep clothes and the bottle. She didn't think she been gone more than a minute, but he was out when she got back to the room.
"Daryl."
"Hmmm?"
"We're almost done, please get these shorts on. Can you manage?"
He opened one eye, "Ya offerin' ta do it for me?"
"Smart aleck. I would if I had to but I think you can do it."
"That's what the shot's for, can I get that bottle?"
"Don't you want a glass?"
He just looked at her as he took a pull and then handed it back. "A'ight, I'ma do this now."
She wasn't sure what she should do but she figured they were both adults so she simply turned around. "Let me know when you're decent."
His laugh was barely audible, "Yeah."
Although she was pretty sure he was trying very hard to stifle the sound, she could tell by the noises he was making that it was a lot of exertion and there was pain. Finally he breathed out a, "K," and she could tell by the sound of it he was physically done in. She went to him and like she'd done earlier she ran a hand through his hair. He was so spent his eyes didn't open but his eyebrows arched up as he kind of hummed, "mmmm."
"We're almost done Daryl, then you can rest for as long as you like."
"Timmy…" The name barely came out.
"He'll be fine. I'll take care of him, you should know that."
"I do." And that warmed her heart.
His legs were a mass of bruises and one knee was almost raw. There were more of the cuts, lots of scrapes, and on the backs of his thighs she saw the old scaring, just like on his back. Her heart broke thinking that someone had hurt him that way. That's when it dawned on her, why he'd mentioned that he didn't hit Timmy, why he'd said something to her before he left the little boy with her.
There was definitely so much she didn't know about Daryl Dixon and she wanted the opportunity to learn it all.
When she was done cleaning and treating the wounds on his legs she softly said, "I want to let you rest Daryl but I know you want to cover up before Timmy sees you. Let me help you please. If you can lift your head up just a little I can get your t-shirt on." She was able to get that accomplished with a little help from him and a lot less trouble than she'd feared.
Now for the pants. She gathered up the legs and slipped one of each of his feet through each of the openings. She alternated carefully pulling them up leg to leg, until the waistband was up passed his knees. As bad off as he was he tried to joke about looking so awful she had to hurry and get clothes on him. She wanted to tell him that as bad as he looked he still looked real good to her, but she didn't, "Stop that. Okay, you have to pull them up over your butt yourself, can you?"
"Gimme one more pull from the bottle, please." She did and then turned her back, he groaned as he pulled them on. But finally at least phase one of the whole ordeal was complete.
By the time she was done cleaning and treating him, cleaning up the messes in the bedroom and bathroom, and washing herself up, it was four in the morning. She couldn't recall ever having been so tired.
She went to him and she knew he was asleep, she bent down and kissed his cheek, "Goodnight Daryl, sleep well."
His voice was barely there, "Ya said a serious hug."
She felt a smile spread across her face as she leaned down as far as she could to hug him. Apparently that wasn't enough. He put his arm around her back gently trying to move her toward him, "C'mere, please."
She could feel the color rise in her face but she didn't argue, instead she lay down next to him. She was careful as she put an arm around his waist, trying hard not to hurt him. His eyes were closed but his hand moved to her hair and he lightly ran his fingers through her blond curls. He moved his head just enough to softly kiss her forehead. "Really am sorry Beth, ya know ya mean so much ta me."
She woke to a tiny hand patting her arm,"Bef." Thank goodness he'd come to her side of the bed. She rolled over facing the little boy. "Good morning Timmy, do you want to snuggle for a minute?" He just rubbed his little eyes and nodded. She helped him up on the bed and held him close. Running her hand through his curly hair, "Did you sleep good? Did you have sweet dreams about trucks and crossbows and coloring pictures? You know you're the best little boy in the whole world don't you? I love you Timmy."
She thought he was sound asleep but as soon as the words were out of her mouth she felt Daryl's hand on her shoulder, "Beth," was all he said and then she heard the soft snoring again.
Timmy came to life and as tired as she was, and as much as she wanted to just sleep she got up and put her robe and slippers on, "C'mon Timmy let's you and I fix breakfast, okay?"
"K Bef."
"First we'd better get this fire stoked." Just as she'd done the day before she mimicked Daryl's actions, kneeling in front of the woodstove and opening the heavy door. Timmy handed her the log from the stack and she smiled at the proud little boy, "You're such a good helper, thank you Timmy. I think we may need one more, just a small one." He handed her the next and she put it in, closed the door and told him, "There we go Timmy we'll be warm and dry now, won't we?"
"Yes Bef." She couldn't help herself, she hugged the little guy close for just a minute.
She sat him on the counter the way she'd seen his Daddy do so often. "What shall we have for breakfast today?"
He grinned so happily, "Cakes pwease."
"Pancakes it is. Will you help me? It's easier with two of us."
"Yes Bef."
She was so tired, and her stomach felt unsettled. She supposed the upset in her stomach was from the upset of everything that had happened, combined with her lack of sleep. She didn't think she could eat, and she was pretty sure Daryl wouldn't be eating pancakes today. It was more likely she'd be taking the leftover chicken and making a pot of soup. But Timmy didn't need to know any of that. She was determined to keep things as normal for him as she could. And besides, the leftover pancakes would keep just fine in the refrigerator; he could have them again tomorrow morning.
He held his arms out, palms up and shrugged those little shoulders, "Daddy?"
She took a deep breath. "Daddy's feeling just a little bit sick, he's going to stay in bed and rest and you and me will take care of him, okay?"
"K Bef." The sweet little boy looked so worried and she wanted to reassure him. She also felt terrible he'd seen her in bed with his Daddy. He didn't seem to think anything of it, but still she was concerned.
"He's going to be just fine Timmy, it will only take a day or two, alright? The more he rests the better he's going to feel. That's why I laid down with him for just a minute, so he could fall asleep. Anyway, we're going to stay busy ourselves today and let him rest all he needs to, does that sound okay?"
"Yes Bef."
She pretended to eat while Timmy enjoyed his breakfast, and she was relieved to see his concerns about his Daddy had eased. She still didn't know what had happened to Daryl, she was hoping later in the day after he'd slept and maybe eaten, he'd feel well enough to tell her.
What wouldn't quit playing over in her mind was the way he'd taken her hand twice, the words he'd said when he apologized, the hug, and the kiss. He'd told her she meant "so much" to him, and she hoped he meant it in the way she wanted. That he was interested in maybe pursuing some kind of relationship with her, not just a friendship.
After they'd cleaned the kitchen she told Timmy, "I know you don't usually get to watch cartoons during the day, but I'm going to let you watch one right now if you make me a promise, okay?"
He trained those big blue eyes on her, "K Bef."
"Okay, you have to stay right on the couch and watch the cartoon, no bothering Daddy or trying to do anything else. If Daddy needs something you come knock on the bathroom door and let me know, then you come back to the couch, okay?" She didn't know why she was so nervous about leaving him for twenty minutes while she quickly showered and dressed. Moms had to do stuff like that all the time. But then she'd never been a mom.
"Yes Bef." She thought of Daryl's words and he was right, Timmy really was a yes man.
She got her clothes from the room and checked on Daryl, he seemed to be sleeping peacefully. It was all she could do not to lay down with him, but no that couldn't happen right now. Someday maybe, she hoped.
She didn't think she'd ever taken a faster shower; it was like she was late for work. She didn't even bother to dry her hair. She'd just let that hair dry as curly as it wanted then she'd put it in a ponytail. She hurriedly got dressed, dashed in the living room to check on Timmy, and seeing all was well there, she got her phone and went in Daryl's room to call her mother.
She took a deep breath and pushed the button. "Hi Mama. I'm good Mama, I'm really good I promise. Now I don't want you to worry, like I said I'm fine, a 100%. But something happened when the man was working on my car, he got hurt and it's pretty bad. He's quite laid up and it looks like it's going to be that way for a while. I'm so sorry Mama but I feel like they've been so good to me I can't just abandon them now. I'm going to stay and help out. It's only for a couple of days. Mama please don't cry, it's like I told you yesterday, you're going to get sick of me soon enough. I promise when I get home we'll have a mother daughter day, just you and me. Okay Mama? I love you too Mama, you're the best Mother in the whole world, I know that for sure."
She felt so bad lying to her Mother that way, but she knew she'd feel even worse if she left Daryl and Timmy. How could she possibly leave them? How could Daryl take care of the little boy? She'd tell her everything when she saw her, she knew her Mama would understand. They were very much alike.
She quickly made Daryl's bed and then went in Timmy's room to check on him. She ran a hand along his head, and that, "mmmm" sound came from him again, and again she had to fight the urge to lay down with him.
She was happy to see Timmy right where she'd left him on the couch, thoroughly engrossed in a program called "Paw Patrol." She sat down next to him and put her arm around his little shoulders, "I'll let you watch to the end, then we'll turn it off." She liked sitting there with the little boy that way, holding him close. She knew she was letting herself get way too attached to someone else's child, but she couldn't help herself.
When the cartoon was over she told the little boy, "I'm going to work in the kitchen, how about I get your crayons and you keep me company at the kitchen table?"
He smiled and nodded his head and together they quietly entered the bedroom and got his things. But he pointed to his Daddy in the bed, "Daddy sweep."
"That's right Timmy, Daddy's resting so he'll feel better."
She'd no sooner gotten everything into the big pot than she heard him weakly call her name. She and Timmy both hurried to the bedroom. He still sounded weak and tired but it was better. It was how he looked that had gotten so much worse. The bruises had come up on his face and arms and he definitely looked rough. "Hey Shadow, hey Beth."
Before anyone could say a word Timmy was up on that bed and by his Daddy's side. "What Daddy?"
"What happened? Is that what you're tryin' ta ask?"
"What Daddy?" The little boy looked so distressed at the sight of his father bruised and cut face.
"Daddy's okay Shadow. I just fell down is all. I slipped on some ice when I's tryin' ta get Beth's car. I fell right down a big ol' hill an then I had a lotta trouble tryin' ta get back up that hill. It was real steep, like that one near Mr. n Miz Horvath's place, ya know the one? I kept on tryin' but I kept right on fallin' back down. Anyway took me a long time an I got some cuts an bruises, but I'm fine son. An I made it home, I'm always gonna make it home ta ya Shadow, K?"
"K Daddy."
Daryl hugged the little boy but when he looked up he saw she was quietly crying and of course he had no idea why. He just knew he didn't want to see that, but he didn't want to say too much because he also didn't want to upset Timmy any more. He searched her eyes, "Okay?"
"Maybe."
"Can we talk later when the man is restin'?"
"Yes." He nodded to her, never losing that eye contact and she knew she'd worried him, that was clear by the look on his face.
"Aw man, I forgot. Miz Heywood give me a box with eggs an bread an jam, even some cookies for my Shadow. If it's still cold out it outta all be okay. It's on the seat a the work truck."
She nodded, "Okay I'll get it while Timmy's here with you."
She quickly left the room and he heard her stop in the bathroom and blow her nose. His mind was racing trying to think of something he might have said or done to upset her. He knew he'd been an ass the night before but he thought she'd accepted his apology. Maybe not.
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She made Timmy a fried egg sandwich for lunch and peeled an orange for him, and she made Daryl a bowl of grits and some toast. She thought he should try eating something light at first, then they'd see about a little more.
She set Timmy's meal at the little coloring table in his room so they could all be together while he and his Daddy ate. "Where's yours Beth?"
"I'm not hungry right now, thanks."
"Oh yeah? When was the last time ya ate?" She didn't answer she just looked at him. "That's what I thought. I ain't eatin' til ya get ya sumthin'."
"Okay I will right now, but please you need to eat." Out of the blue Timmy piped up, "Daddy eat." That definitely alleviated some of the tension in the room.
She hurried to the kitchen and scooped herself up a bowl of the grits, it was as she did she realized it had been noon the day before when she last ate. No wonder she didn't feel good. She went back in the bedroom and he spoke softly to her, "Will ya sit here by me?" She did as he asked and he laid his hand on hers, "Eat now Beth, please."
And Timmy was at it again, "Bef eat." That did bring a smile to her face and it turned out nice to have the meal together, to not be separated because of Daryl's injuries. She was sure it was comforting for Timmy to be with his Daddy.
Once the little boy was soundly asleep she walked back in the room and looked at Daryl, he lightly patted the spot next to him, and asked, "Will ya please come sit by me?" She did and he spoke to her in that weak raspy voice, "I think I's too tired ta dream, hell I only been up now an hour an I'm already real tired again. But I do remember one dream. You an me an Timmy was up in the woods sittin' round a campfire together. I had one arm round ya an the other round Timmy. You was tellin' us a story. That's all I remember, that an how happy I felt bein' there with the two a ya. Now, ya tell me Beth, what's wrong?"
She couldn't help it, it started again, she was crying softly and he gently squeezed her hand, "What Beth, tell me now, please."
The words rushed out of her, "It's all my fault you got hurt. If I hadn't been so stupid and stubborn in the first place, thinking I could make it home, then sliding off the road, you wouldn't have had to go get my car. You never would have been hurt like this. I just can't believe what I've caused. I feel so terrible and I'm so ashamed and so sorry."
She hadn't quite completed that last sentence before he tenderly moved a hand to the back of her neck, gently guiding her closer to him, until her head lay on his chest.
"Beth I ain't blamin' ya, don't ya ever think that. Ya know how much worse it woulda been if I hadn't had ta help ya that day? Ya realize everythin' that would mean? Cuz I do, I thought about it a lot. Me an Timmy wouldn't a learned how ta make snowflakes, or wrap presents in newspapers, wouldn't know 'bout magic washcloths, wouldn't know how a person makes a cookie or a pie. Worse thing is that'd mean I didn't get ta know ya, that Timmy didn't get ta know ya."
He took in a deep breath and pulled her closer, "I'd fall down that hill a million more times just ta feel ya layin' here with me now."
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Chapter 6: Chapter 6
Summary:
Chapter Text
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His words had caught her completely by surprise. She wasn't sure what she should say so she made no verbal reply, instead her response was to scoot her body closer to his. She kicked her shoes off curling her legs on the bed, lying so near it was as if she'd moved right into him. Her head still lay on his chest and his hand was still in her hair. Silently she took his other hand and drew it close to her lips, and as she lightly kissed it his fingers laced through hers.
She'd had so little sleep and his body was craving sleep to heal; they lay there together quietly, neither one speaking and soon they had dozed off. Until she felt the tiny hand patting her arm, "Bef."
Her smile was instant, the little boy had that effect on her. It was so many things about him, the natural sweetness and innocence of the young child, the way he said her name, the way he so willingly came to her. All of it made her feel a gladness in her heart, and she knew the small boy had owned that heart of hers since her first day with them.
She tried to be so careful as she moved to sit up, not wanting to wake him, but Daryl stirred. "Is that my Shadow?" he mumbled hoarsely. By then she already had the little boy in her arms, holding him close and running her hand through his curls. His Daddy leaned forward as best he could and rubbed his son's back, "There's my boy an he's a fine boy too. Did ya have ya some sweet dreams Shadow? Did ya dream we went for a hike and shot the bow? Just as soon as Daddy feels a little better that's what we're gonna do for sure. We're gonna go out in the woods a ways an see how we like the way it shoots. I love ya Timmy, you're the best little boy in the whole world." With his Daddy still rubbing the little boy's back she leaned her head down and kissed the child's curls.
Suddenly he was wide awake. "Juice pwease?"
"Sure you can have some juice. Let's go in the kitchen and I'll get you some. How about you Daryl? Maybe you should have some juice, you need fluids."
"I'm about ta go in that bathroom an get rid a some fluids."
"Gee, thanks for sharing." She tried hard to look disgusted as she wrinkled her nose at him. But then her concern surfaced, "Are you sure you can make it? I could help you."
"I think I can do this part myself Beth, 'specially that standin' in fronta the porcelain part. I'm hopin' I never have ta ask ya ta help me do that."
She was determined not to give him the satisfaction of laughing but it wasn't easy, "I see you woke up in a playful mood Mister Dixon, I hadn't expected that. I'm sorry I can't stay and enjoy it with you but Timmy and I have juice to pour. We'll bring you back a glass." They exchanged smiles as she left the room.
###
He felt like he was moving in slow motion as he carefully tried to maneuver himself up and out of the bed. It was such a strange feeling, like his body was going so slow while his mind was racing. He couldn't quit thinking about what he'd said; he'd startled himself when he told her first about his dream, and then a lot about how he felt.
He'd been so bold just laying it out to her the way he had, that wasn't like him at all. But she wasn't at all like anyone he'd ever known. There'd been a time in his life, back when he was the man he used to be, that he enjoyed taking risks, but never this type of risk. He'd never risked his feelings. But the man he was now didn't want to take a chance on what might happen if he didn't tell her, if he didn't take that chance.
And it wasn't just one thing that brought his admission on, it was everything. It was like one feeling had played right off the other, and all those heightened emotions had come together.
There was the fear, hers and his. Not that he would ever talk about or admit to being fearful, but he had been. He knew he'd been one lucky son of a bitch to have gotten back up that hill. For a while he'd been pretty sure he wouldn't. And he knew she was fearful, she had to have been when he hadn't come home and she was left alone with his child. And he knew she was fearful when she saw him, when she saw his injuries.
There was the care she'd given him. It hadn't been easy for her and he knew that. Not physically or mentally or any other way. She'd been running on minimum sleep in a still unfamiliar setting, and she was having to clean and care for wounds on man's body. A man she didn't know much about. A man whose body she was not at all familiar with. He'd bet every bit of what he owned she wasn't a woman who was at all accustomed to looking at the bodies of men she didn't know.
But she'd done it because that was her way, she was a person who did what needed to be done. He saw that clearly. And for his part he'd been a dick. And again, because she was the woman she was, she'd forgiven him and moved beyond it.
When she'd begun to cry he had no idea what had brought it on and he'd felt a sense of panic. It hurt him to see her hurt. He couldn't deal with it, with her being so sad. He needed to know why. It's what he did, he fixed things, and now he needed to know how he could fix this. So he told her the dream, thinking if he gave her a little bit of himself maybe she'd give a little bit of herself to him.
What he did next, well what else could he do? He didn't have a choice. When she told him why she was crying, why she felt so bad, he had to tell her he didn't blame her for what had happened, not in any way. He could never blame her, never. And he'd meant every word of what he told her. How she'd brought so much to them, so much they would have missed if they had never known her. And when her head lay on his chest, and his hand was in her hair, he took that risk and the words just seemed to come so naturally and they were true, he'd do it all again, a million more times, just to have that one moment with her.
These kinds of feelings were a new thing for him, something he'd never experienced. He wasn't certain what it all meant or what to do next. He was wishing maybe she'd take the lead, but he didn't think that was going to happen either. All he knew for sure was when he spoke those words to her it was like she just curled right up into him, she'd kissed his bruised and cut up hand. But she didn't tell him her feelings. He thought she had an interest in him, it sure seemed that way. But signs from a woman may be the only signs he couldn't read. He hoped if she did have feelings, those feelings would be that she cared for him not just as a friend, but also in the way a woman cares for a man.
###
As they walked through the living room she noticed the fire, "Oh dear look Timmy, I think we'd better add a log to that fire before we do anything else. We've let it burn down to just embers."
"K Bef."
She knelt in front of the stove and he handed her the log, "Thank you Timmy this one is going to burn real good, I can tell just by looking at it." She smiled at the little boy as she placed it in the coals. "I think just one more for now, we don't want to put the embers out by adding too much too soon, okay?"
"K Bef." He was so serious as he handed her the second log and then stood behind her. He leaned over her shoulder as he watched her set it in the stove and stir the coals a little with the poker. She grinned to herself, wondering if the small boy thought she couldn't do this without his help. She hoped that was exactly what he thought.
"Thank you Timmy, you're such a wonderful helper. Now let's get your juice, I know you're thirsty." They went to the kitchen and she poured juice for the little one and a tall glass for his Daddy. "I'll let you have this in your room so you can visit with Daddy, but you have to let me carry it in there for you, okay?"
"K Bef."
The notion just came to her and she bent down and asked him, "Will you say Beth?" And she hit that 'th' sound hard. The little boy looked at her quizzically as he responded, "Bef."
It was so sweet and he was so precious, he was doing his best and she was starting to like her new name. "That's right Timmy, I just love to hear you say my name."
They walked in the living room and she let out a sort of mini gasp when she saw Daryl sitting in the chair, "You should be in bed resting." As she was saying the words Timmy was running to him and crawling in his lap.
"Nah, a man can't be layin' up in bed all day, it ain't like I'm sick just got some cuts n bruises is all. I wanna be out here spendin' my time with my boy an with you."
He was trying to hide it, pretend it didn't hurt, but she could see it in his face. He was covered in cuts and bruises and the little boy crawling on him in that way, it had to be painful. But she wasn't surprised he didn't complain at all or tell the child to stop.
She already knew many things about this man. He definitely had a sense of the way things were supposed to be. And he'd made it clear he believed the little boy should learn how to do things, that he should help and contribute and that he should have manners. But she also knew how devoted he was to Timmy, how much love he gave the child and how sensitive he was to his son's feelings. He'd endure all the pain he had to just to have the closeness with the little boy.
"There's probably no changing your mind so while you two keep each other company, I'm going to put some wash in. I didn't know I was going to be staying and I'm out of clean clothes. And while you're out of the bed I probably need to wash the sheets. There was a lot of…" She looked at the little boy and didn't say the word, but Daryl knew she meant the blood he'd undoubtedly left on those sheets.
"Ya ain't gotta Beth, lemme do it."
"No, it's more important for you to be with Timmy, he needs his Daddy time."
"You're kind of a bossy woman ain't ya?" She knew he was teasing by that little smile on his lips.
"Only when you force my hand." He hadn't seen it coming and he was a little stunned, she stopped next to his chair on her way to the bedroom. She was resting her hand lightly on his shoulder while she bent down and kissed the top of Timmy's head. Then with her cheek next to Daryl's cheek she whispered in his ear, "Please be a good patient and take it easy. I want you to get better Daryl, please." And then she kissed him. Though it was on the lips it was innocent, but it was a kiss and it brought a smile to his face.
She put the sheets and her pajamas in the washer with some peroxide hoping that would help with the blood stains. She straightened up Daryl's bed from Timmy's nap and walked back in the living room to find them both on the floor. They were playing their game of stacking the blocks and knocking them over, both of them laughing like little boys.
"Daryl do you think that's a good idea for you right now?"
He heard the strain in her voice and he did feel bad for causing it, so he tried a big smile to ease her concern, "It probably ain't so good for my body but it's doin' my heart an my mind a whole lotta good. An look, I drank all my juice."
She couldn't help it, as annoyed as she was with him she was smiling, "Fine, just because of you I'm about to give up on my new nursing career. My patient is so uncooperative it's just not working out at all."
She left them playing and went in the kitchen to see about the soup. He frustrated her with his unwillingness to just take it easy for a couple of days, but she wasn't surprised by it. He wasn't the kind of man who would give in to any physical pain, not without a fight anyway. She admired him for it but it was so exasperating because she did want him to get better.
Of course when he got better she wouldn't have any more excuses, she'd have to go home. She tried not to think about that.
She stirred the soup, tidied up the kitchen that didn't need tidying, and went to the mud room to put his sheets in the dryer and her clothes in the washer. The clothes he'd worn the day before were beyond help. She checked his pockets, removing a billfold and a ring of keys, and then threw the clothes in the trash. She stood there a minute and then took them back out. She'd better ask, it seemed like that man never threw anything away. He'd find something those clothes were good for.
She thought it would be better for Daryl, a quiet game they could all play together, so when she walked back in the living room she mentioned, "I saw the checker board in Timmy's room, how about we all play checkers? Me and Timmy against you."
"That ain't fair, that's two against one." He was trying to look real serious, she supposed for Timmy's sake.
"Let me think about this Daryl, I haven't played in years and I'd bet Timmy has never played, but judging by how old that checker board is you've been playing your whole life." She gave him her best sassy look.
"Nah, them checkers belonged ta my brother. Checkers, dominoes an chess. He was a master. Army an prison trained. Course he mighta taken me under his wing, taught me a trick or two."
"I'll just bet. I'll go get them." The way he'd used the past tense when talking about his brother she was pretty sure the brother must have died. And he'd mentioned prison. That made her wonder if Daryl had also been in prison. It seemed like there was a lot of sadness in Daryl's life, and so much she still didn't know. Maybe later that night when Timmy went to bed they'd talk a little bit.
There was that one burning question she was dying to know the answer to, what was the story on Timmy?
She and Timmy beat him every game and every time they did, when Timmy wasn't looking she'd shake her head "no" at Daryl. She knew he'd lost on purpose. Then they played that one last game and he had it won before they'd barely gotten started. She squinted an eye at him, "I just knew it."
He smiled back, "Just a trick or two I learned from the master."
He was trying to stifle it but that yawn wouldn't be denied.
"That's it Daryl you need to rest, at least for a little while. Timmy and I are going to put the sheets back on his bed but you can lie down in your room. Then Timmy's going to help me make the biscuits for dinner. We'll come get you when it's ready. Please."
This time he didn't argue or try to make jokes, he knew he'd hit the wall. "A'ight I'ma do it, I am kinda tired." He got to his room and quietly slid open the top drawer of his dresser, slipped out the bottle of Jack and took a pull. Every part of him, every inch of skin he had and every nerve ending was screaming in pain. He hadn't wanted to let on to Timmy or Beth, he wanted to spend time with them and enjoy them. He knew now it had set him back. He took one more pull, thinking that ought to do it, he'd sleep.
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She went in to tell him dinner was ready but when she saw how hard he was sleeping she couldn't bring herself to wake him. She hoped he wouldn't be upset later when he learned Timmy had his meal without him; but she took the chance because she was sure what Daryl needed more than anything right now was rest.
"Timmy your Daddy is still sound asleep, he's very tired. We're going to have our dinner and then when we get the kitchen clean you can watch a program, alright?"
"K Bef, hungwy pwease."
"I'm sure you are and I'm hungry too. You sit up to the table now and I'll get your food."
She set a bowl of the hearty soup and a small plate with a buttered biscuit in front of him, and when he said, "Tank ya Bef." It was so sweet and perfect she thought she might cry.
"You're very welcome." She'd eaten so little herself the last two days that this night she didn't need to pretend. She and Timmy both finished their dinner and had a cookie for dessert.
She cleared the table and then gave him a damp cloth. That was his job, to wipe off the table and chairs. She loved how seriously he took his chore.
When their work was done they sat on the couch and she asked him, "Okay which program tonight Timmy?"
"Fwosty."
She was holding in a laugh. "Are you sure? We've watched that quite a bit. Isn't there anything else you might want to see?"
"No Bef."
"Okay, Frosty it is." She started the program, put her arm around him and within two minutes she was sound asleep. She woke to the little boy patting her leg, and the controller was in his hand. "Timmy how many times did we watch Frosty?" He held up two tiny fingers. She couldn't get mad at him, it was her own fault, she was the one who'd fallen asleep on the job. "Uh oh, we'd better get you in that bathtub."
"K Bef." When he looked at her with those big blue eyes she knew it would be really hard to ever get mad at the sweet little boy.
She gave him his bath and got his pajamas on, and she was just trying to decide which bed to put him in when Daryl called to them from the bedroom, "Beth? Shadow?"
He'd propped himself up a little in the bed and although it didn't seem possible, he looked even more tired. "Oh man I see I slept a while, my boys' already in his pajamas. Can I get a hug an maybe even a kiss before bed?"
She helped the little boy up and cautioned, "Be a little bit careful Timmy, Daddy has some hurts."
"Daddy?"
"I'm okay son I told ya, remember? I fell down an hurt myself a little. I just gotta rest a couple days."
"K Daddy." Timmy leaned over and puckered those lips like a little fish, his Daddy smiled and did the same right back. "I need ya ta sleep in your own bed tonight son. Ya can't be gettin' in the habit a sleepin' with me. Ya have real sweet dreams now an ya remember your Daddy loves ya. K?" He felt bad, but he knew the little boy kicking and squirming in his sleep wasn't going to help those wounds heal.
"I yuv Daddy." His Daddy gave him one more hug.
"Will ya help him Beth, then come back n talk ta me?"
"Of course I will." Again she tried to keep it all as normal as possible. She took the little boy to his room, tucked him in and told him a story. Then she hugged him, "You're such a good boy Timmy I just don't know what I would have done today without all of your help. Thank you for being such a good helper. You sleep tight now and have some happy dreams, okay? I love you."
"I yuv Bef." And she was so moved by his words she had to have one more hug. "I'll see you in the morning."
She'd heard Daryl get up and use the bathroom while she was telling Timmy the story, and he'd gone right back to the bedroom. She was concerned.
"Are you doing okay Daryl?"
He took a deep breath, "Don't expect me ta admit this very often, but ya was right an I's wrong. I shoulda laid up in bed. I think I give myself a setback."
"Well I didn't want to be right about that. Let me get you some dinner, you've hardly eaten in two days. I'll be right back."
She came back with the food, handing him the big bowl and setting the plate of biscuits on the night table, "Looks good an smells even better, thanks Beth. Did my Shadow eat good?"
"Every bite. He really is such a good boy Daryl, you should be very proud."
He looked at her like he was studying her and then nodded his head, "Thanks that means a lot. It's important ta me that he's a good boy an that he grows up ta be a good man." He said it in a way other people might say they wished their child stayed healthy and got a good education.
When he'd finished his food and she took the dishes from him he asked her, "Will ya come back an visit with me?"
"Yes of course I will, I'll be right back."
When she returned to the room he looked at her, that crooked half smile on his lips, "Will ya sit up here on the bed with me? As bad as I'm feelin' I think you'll be safe."
"You didn't have to warn me Daryl."
"Thank ya for takin' such good care a my boy Beth. Ya been so good ta the both of us an ya been workin' too hard."
"I've enjoyed it, Timmy's a sweetheart and you're kind of nice too, when you do what I say." She said it with a smile and he laughed and told her, "I never did mind real well."
He got a more serious look on his face when he asked her, "Tell me about Beth. Who are ya?"
"Who am I? What do you mean? I'm confused."
"Ya said ya grew up on a farm, ya been livin' in Atlanta for a year. Now ya been stuck here with me an my boy a few days. Where would ya be tonight if ya wasn't sittin' here with me?"
"I'd be home on the farm with Mama and Daddy. I wasn't just going home for Christmas, I was going home to them because I have nowhere else to go. I made just enough money in Atlanta, barely enough, to pay rent on the smallest apartment you've ever seen. Now I need to try and figure out what I'm doing with my life, settle on a career, find a good job. All the things I should have done long before now."
"Ya said ya didn't really care for it there. Why's that?"
"A few reasons I guess. It's not that Atlanta's some terrible place but it was just so busy, there's so many people. I went there thinking it would be exciting and I'd make all kinds of friends and we'd do fun things every weekend, and I'd be so happy that I'd moved. Instead I was lonely, I didn't make any friends really, and I didn't have enough left over after paying the rent and buying a few groceries to go out anywhere."
Then he got to the real question that was on his mind, and she recognized it for what it was the minute he asked, "What, ya didn't have ya a boyfriend?"
"No, not really. I dated a guy a few times. He was an agent at the real estate company I was working for. I thought he was a real nice guy at first, it turned out he wasn't nice at all."
He suddenly felt angry and protective and he wasn't even sure why. His instinct was to take her hand, which is what he did, "What? He hurt ya somehow?"
"Let's just say he had a lot of trouble believing that when I said no it was what I meant. He was that kind of man that feels since he bought a few dinners and a bouquet of flowers, you owe him payment. He seemed pretty convinced he was irresistible. You know what I'm talking about. I ended it on my front porch one night and when he started yelling at me it was pretty bad. I got scared and screamed, that's when the lady next door came out with her son's baseball bat and ran him off."
He was mad just thinking about it but it had happened, it was done and there was nothing he could do now. He moved on, "So no one now, huh?"
"No Daryl, no one now. What about you? Who are you when I'm not here?"
He chewed on his lip for a minute before he answered. He wanted her to know the truth, if she was going to be scared off, or disgusted by him, or whatever, he wanted it to happen now. Before either he or Timmy fell in any deeper. "I wasn't always a good man Beth. The man I used ta be, I don't think you'd want anythin' ta do with that man, not a nice woman like ya are."
"So you used to act badly but you've changed?"
He snickered at that, "Yeah I guess ya could put it real nice that way. But the hard truth is I's just a redneck asshole with an even bigger asshole for a brother. Merle an me were real bad news."
"Were you in jail Daryl?" She couldn't believe she just came right out and asked like that, but then he'd brought these things up.
She was surprised he smiled at her question, "I got that ex con look do I? Nah, I's lucky, I coulda gone for the things I done but I never did get caught. Merle, my brother, he probably wouldn't a ever got caught either if it hadn't been for dope. He got clean a couple times but Merle just couldn't get clear a the dope for good, not until he died."
"You miss him, don't you?"
"Mosta my life he was my whole family."
"I'm really sorry Daryl, that must be so hard. Can I ask, and I promise I wouldn't if you hadn't brought it up first, but what are these things you did that you could have gone to prison for?" She was hopeful it wasn't anything that would be deal breaker for her. No matter how attracted she was to him and how much she cared for Timmy, there were a couple of things she knew she couldn't live with.
"Beth ya can ask me anythin', I'm tellin' ya all a this in case ya wanna run off, get outta here real quick. I want ya ta know the truth about me. As for crimes, it was the usual bullshit mostly. I drank way too much an rode my Bike even when I's stumblin' drunk. I fought anybody and everybody every damn chance I got. An we stole, me an Merle stole money an we stole stuff. That's why I got the rule for myself now, why I don't take no money from older people, or expect payment from people I know ain't got much money. It's the only way I can think ta make up for them things I done. The only reason I take the food an the little stuff from em is cuz they got their pride, they don't want me ta just keep doin' for 'em if they ain't payin' me somehow."
She'd just seen a whole new side of Daryl Dixon, "I think that's beautiful Daryl. That's a wonderful way to look at things, the perfect way to make up for what you did. Can I ask what changed your mind, what made you decide to change?"
"It was strange really, one day it was like it hit me an I come ta my senses. Decided I's either gonna change it up or I's gonna die young. My choice. I decided ta try an have a life for myself."
"I's 22 livin' outside Atlanta, Merle was hittin' the crystal real hard. I went off by myself in the mountains an I thought about everythin'. I come back ta town an I got me a job, a real job workin' construction. I stayed away from Merle an that was the hardest but I done it. I went ta trade school at night an studied up on HVAC, an I got certified an licensed. When I's 24 I got this place. About three years later, when I's 27, I got Timmy."
She would have asked her big question then but there was something he'd said that she couldn't stop thinking about. It was how he seemed to think once she knew about his past she'd want to just hurry and leave him. She had to let him know that wasn't the case, not at all.
She gently touched her hand to his face, lightly resting it on his cheek, "What I know is you're a very brave man Daryl Dixon. You walked away from a life you knew everything about, a life where you had money and you had your brother. But you knew the things you were doing weren't right, and instead of just wishing those things were different you had the courage to change everything. You'd never been caught and no one here knew anything about you. But you still wanted to make it right so you're giving back to people that need help, and you're raising the best little boy I've ever seen."
"I'd say the man you are is everything a real man should be. I'm not running anywhere Daryl."
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Chapter 7: Chapter 7
Summary:
Chapter Text
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This time it was her that reached for his hand, "This is quite the situation we've found ourselves in Daryl. I thought I was going home for Christmas to stay with my folks and try and start a new life. Instead I wound up in a cabin in the woods with a man and a little boy. We've been together and very isolated here for these five days. That's a lot of togetherness. I feel in some ways I know you better than I know anyone except my immediate family. But I also feel like there's so much I don't know about you and about Timmy."
She felt him stiffen just a little when she mentioned not knowing about Timmy, but he nodded, "I said I'd tell ya whatever ya wanted ta know an I will."
She watched him and his blue eyes, even with the pronounced bruising around them, were still so focused. She did want to ask questions but he looked so exhausted, and she was sure whatever the story was it wasn't going to be quick or without a lot of questions on her part. "Let's talk again tomorrow night, after Timmy's gone to bed. Then maybe you can answer my biggest question."
"What's that?"
"Who is Timmy?"
He continued to stare hard into her eyes. "I'll tell ya all of it cuz I trust ya, an I said I'd answer whatever questions ya had. It's just that it ain't sumthin' folks round here know about. They got no need ta know."
Now she was really intrigued but even though it seemed he'd slept a lot, she could see his eyes were heavy and he was fading fast. This was a conversation she did not want to rush. "Whatever you tell me Daryl is between us, I wouldn't betray your confidence. Tomorrow night then, right here? Will that work?"
"Yeah sure, I ain't ashamed a nuthin' Beth. I'll answer your questions."
"I never thought it was something you should be ashamed of. It's just that now I think we're both thinking maybe there could be something between us, I know I am. So it's a two way street. I want you to know you can ask me all the questions you want Daryl."
"Right now I just got the one, will ya lay here with me tonight? I ain't kiddin' when I say I'm pretty harmless right now." He tried to smile but he even seemed too tired for that.
She laughed softy, leaned up and kissed his cheek, "Thank you for the invitation and it does sound like something I'd like to do. I just don't think we should. If Timmy finds us in bed together again I want it to be because we belong there with each other."
Now he reached up and moved his fingers through her hair, "I knew ya was quite a woman Beth. Like none I ever knew for sure. I respect what you're sayin' an I'm sure you're right, but dammit, I'd like ta feel ya close ta me."
"Close to you is where I'd like to be Daryl. That's why I'd better go in the other room now before I weaken and change my mind."
She lay there snuggling the little boy but her eyes were wide open. There was so much to think about. Daryl and Timmy, everything that had and could happen, all of it was keeping her mind too busy to rest. She still wondered at how she could already have such deep feelings for this man, and he claimed to have them for her. But then just as she'd said to him earlier, it had been five days of togetherness and mostly isolated from the rest of the world.
She'd grown up on the farm, not exactly a city life but they did have almost daily contact with neighbors. They'd go back and forth to each other's homes and help one another with the stock or the harvest, babysitting and rides into town. Her Mama canned and sewed with the other ladies. Her Daddy talked commodity prices and played checkers and cribbage with the other men. It was a farming community.
But no one had visited here. Even though she knew she was getting way ahead of herself and the situation, she couldn't help but wonder just what it would be like living in a place like this all the time. It felt so remote and it gave the sense of being an entirely different world.
She knew a lot of that feeling was because of the way he lived. Daryl seemed to prefer the old fashioned ways, definitely appearing to be very comfortable with the lifestyle. And the little boy now sleeping in her arms was comfortable with it too. His whole world was right here in this home with his Daddy or in that work truck with his Daddy.
She knew now Daryl had a past and even as open and honest as he'd been she was sure there was much more to it. She wanted to know about all of it. She felt pretty sure it was his father who had beaten him so badly he had scars. Was the man now gone or dead or what? And what about his mother, where was she? The brother had died, was there no one else? She had so many questions.
Timmy though, Timmy was her biggest question. She'd come to feel pretty certain Timmy was not his child. She couldn't put her finger on exactly why it was she thought that, but she did. Yet never had she seen anyone love a child more or be so selfless. As much as she was anxious for answers, once that door was open she wanted him alert and ready to tell it all.
She also had some concern about appearing to interrogate him for answers to her many questions. She thought she should tread lightly. She was pretty sure his physical injuries had contributed to his sudden openness, his vulnerability and she didn't want to take advantage. She didn't want him to have second thoughts later, to regret that he'd told her things, especially the thing that was apparently his biggest secret.
Then there was the "them." He'd made it clear he had feelings for her and she didn't doubt he would be honest about something so serious. She felt confident he wasn't the kind to play at something like this. Especially with how careful he was about his son.
So many questions.
ooo00ooo
As bone-tired as he felt his mind was working overtime. He wanted to have something with this woman and he was no longer going to deny that fact, to himself or to her. Now she'd finally opened that door and let him know she was interested. But he had questions, serious questions because he wasn't in this alone. It wasn't that simple. He had to put Timmy first. No matter what might eventually happen between him and Beth before anything ever got started he needed to know. Could she even consider taking on someone else's child? He'd heard ladies talk about that, how a lot of men shied away from a woman with children, not wanting to take on the responsibility of another man's child. Would she feel that way about another woman's child?
Did she have the kind of love that could look passed where a child came from? It seemed like she did, just by the way she'd been with Timmy, how she cared for him and loved on him. Still though it had been limited to a few days. Maybe she'd tire of having to worry over a small boy, especially if he got sick and cried all night with an earache, or because he was cutting a molar.
Would she say it was all just too much and walk away? He didn't think so but he didn't know for sure.
As for the story of how he came to be Timmy's Daddy he figured there was a 50 / 50 chance of her either thinking he was a good man, or thinking he'd been foolish to take it on. He couldn't even believe he was going to tell her, he must have stronger feelings for her than even he was aware of. So few people knew the story, only those who absolutely needed to know. Now he was going to share this very personal information with a woman he'd just met.
And then there was his life. She'd told him she didn't care for city life, but not caring to live in a big city and being willing to live how he lived weren't quite the same thing.
Everything in life was some kind of compromise, he understood that and he thought he could make changes if that was what she wanted. But he could never change the fact that he was Timmy's Daddy. That was a commitment he'd made, and his profound love for the child would never allow him to be anything less than a loving and involved Daddy to him.
Yeah, there were questions.
ooo00ooo
Timmy had wakened and she'd snuggled him close, loving him awake and then they were off to check the woodstove. But before she'd even gotten her robe on her phone rang. She told the little boy, "Go ahead and look but don't touch, okay?"
"K Bef."
She grabbed her phone as she walked from the room and got a little nervous because the screen said, "Mama." Why was Mama calling so early?
"Mama? Is everything okay? Is Daddy alright? Oh, well um, well...yes of course I'm sure it's fine. Yes okay let me tell you all that…"
When the conversation ended she hurried over to the stove, "Sorry Timmy. Now we'd better see about this fire." She hoped her tone didn't give away her current state of mini panic.
They got the fire stoked and she and Timmy had just gone in the kitchen to get breakfast ready, when Daryl walked in to join them. His hair was sticking out all over, he still looked exhausted and his t-shirt and sleep pants were a wrinkled mess. She was sure no man had ever looked better.
He was rubbing a hand through his hair as he smiled at the two of them, "Is that my Shadow up an about? And Beth, just look at the two of ya. Got the fire going good an you're fixin' breakfast. It's like ya don't need me at all. I guess I'll go on back ta bed."
"No Daddy hep."
"Help? I gotta help? Ah alright. What's Daddy gotta do Shadow?"
Beth chimed in then, "Daddy should make the coffee, I think he does it best."
"I'm on it. What's for breakfast?"
"Well if Timmy wants them I have pancakes saved for him. Do you want pancakes Timmy?"
"Cakes pwease."
"You're spoilin' him. Pancakes are for Sunday an special days. But that does sound real good." He smiled at her again as he casually touched her upper arm. "Let me get this old coffee pot an the bacon goin'."
Timmy was up on the counter watching as his Daddy lay bacon in the pan and she teased Daryl, "I didn't know there was a pancake rule around here, gosh my Daddy eats them every day."
"Your Mama spoils your Daddy pretty good, huh?" He was smiling now.
"Yes she does and he spoils her too." She smiled right back.
"I like that, that seems good."
"Well hold that thought Daryl because I have some news."
He could tell by her tone she was a little nervous, he turned and put a hand on her shoulder, "What?"
"Mama called this morning. They want to meet this family I've been staying with so long so they're coming for lunch, they're bringing the fried chicken and a potato salad." And she was so scared he'd be upset she put her hand over her mouth thinking she might throw up.
"Hey Beth it's fine. C'mon now. What are ya worried about?"
"There's a couple of things. Umm…" She inclined her head toward Timmy, just a little, "Maybe we can talk about it after breakfast."
He thought he knew what the problem was. "Uh huh. Ya a little embarrassed of us are ya?" He'd read it all wrong.
"No. Why would you say that? That's not it at all, please can we talk in a little bit?" And she knew what he was thinking now and she didn't want that. When he turned back to the stove she wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her head lightly against his back. "You know better."
Her hand was on his stomach and he wrapped his around it, "Sorry."
"It's okay, you'll be happier once you've had coffee and some day old pancakes."
When they'd eaten and cleaned the kitchen he told Timmy, "Daddy's gonna take a bath now. I need ya ta sit on the couch while I do. Don't want ya ta be gettin' into anythin', k?"
"K Daddy."
"I'll turn on that cartoon ya like an when I get all cleaned up then we can play, a'ight?"
"Yes Daddy."
"Are you sure you're okay to bathe Daryl?"
"I might need ya ta take off some a them bandages on my back, but I'm good."
She followed him into the bathroom and for some reason that felt more personal than sitting on his bed with him.
He pulled his t-shirt off and she almost gasped, but not really from the wounds or the bruises, or even the terrible scars on his back. It was him. She'd been so worried and concentrating so hard on his injuries the other night she must not have been paying attention. But it got her full attention now. Seeing him standing there in just those sleep pants was a sight she was enjoying maybe just a little too much.
He had his back to her then, "So while you're rippin' them bandages off an makin' me cry an all, why don't ya tell me what's goin' on with the folks?"
"It's my own fault Daryl, I know that. I thought it was the right thing at the time, sparing Mama. But it was wrong and I know it."
"What are ya even talkin' about?"
He made her laugh, "Well I don't suppose men have to worry about this stuff like women do. I just thought Mama would be very uncomfortable with the idea of me staying with a man I didn't know. Now that I say it out loud it does sound bad and they're a little old fashioned. So I made it sound like it was a family, like a husband and wife and little boy. I didn't actually say that but I know I implied it. Now they're going to see it's just been you, me and Timmy. I guess I'm just worried they'll think…oh you have to know what I'm worried they'll think."
He didn't say anything he simply turned around, took her face in his hands, leaned it and gave her a long, slow and very intense kiss. Eventually he pulled his face away a little and smiled, "I wasn't plannin' on kissin' ya like that until maybe after we had our talk tonight. But ya got me thinkin' your old man is gonna kick my ass so I better just go ahead an do it now, ya know while I still can."
She was breathless and speechless and a little bit confused, and also real pleased. "Daryl I, I…"
"Yeah, that." And he did it again. This time as he pulled away he said, "Ya better quit makin' me do that now Beth, I gotta get a bath company's comin'. Ya wanna help? Maybe hold a magic washcloth for me or anythin'?"
"What in the world got into you Daryl Dixon?"
"Must be them day old pancakes. Ya ain't mad are ya?"
"I didn't act like I was mad did I?"
He smiled as he leaned in and kissed her cheek, "Better run, I'm about ta take my pants off an start fillin' this tub."
"Smart aleck."
She hurried to make the beds and 20 minutes later he was calling her name, "Hey Beth, can ya help me out in here?"
She was almost afraid what that might mean. She tapped lightly on the bathroom door and when he opened it there he stood, in nothing but the towel wrapped around his waist, his shaggy hair dripping and a big grin. "Can ya take care a them cuts on my back, please?"
"Yes if you'll be good and let me." But she smiled when she said it and he smiled back.
He got a little more serious when he told her, "It's gonna be alright Beth, me an Timmy's gonna be on our best behavior today, K?"
"If they get upset it won't be at you, but thank you for that."
She doctored the wounds and then told him, "I'll get Timmy dressed while you get dressed."
"Thanks an hey, don't worry so much you're a grown woman Beth, they know that, right?"
"They do but Mama says I'll always be her little girl."
"Yeah? That's kinda sweet, you're lucky for that."
They arrived promptly at 11:30 just like Mama said they would. "Mama, Daddy this is Daryl Dixon and his son Timmy Dixon. Daryl, Timmy these are my parents Annette and Hershel Greene."
Daryl nodded to her Mama first, "Nice ta meet ya Ma'am lemme take them bags ta the kitchen for ya. C'mon son ya carry this little one. Be right back Sir."
"Yes Daddy." Mama was charmed by the man and his little boy, although she did think they could both use a haircut.
Annette and Beth remained in the kitchen to get lunch prepared, while Daryl and Timmy walked back in the living room. Daryl extended his hand to her father, "Sir, very nice ta meet ya. Thanks for comin' by. C'mon n have a seat in the livin' room."
He noticed her Daddy had a hitch in his gate and didn't move too fast, but he didn't seem infirm at all, "Nice place you've got here Daryl, I haven't been out this way in years. Is Dale Horvath still living out this way?"
"Yeah he is, he an Miz Horvath are good folk, I done quite a bit a work for 'em the past couple years."
"You sound like a country boy Daryl."
"Yeah I guess ya could call it that, or redneck."
"Nothing wrong with a neck that's red from working in the sun all day, is there now?"
"No sir an thanks for sayin' so." He liked her Daddy.
In the meantime in the kitchen Mama asked right away, 'Where's Mrs. Dixon?"
Beth swallowed hard and quickly said a silent prayer, "Well Mama there is no Mrs. Dixon, it's just Daryl and Timmy."
Mama's mouth dropped just a little while her eyebrows shot up a bit, "Baby girl have you been staying out here with just that man and his child?"
"Yes Mama I have and before you get all riled up remember that man saved my life. He's been a gentleman and Timmy is the best little boy I've ever seen."
"Why Miss Beth Greene have you got a crush on that man?"
"Mama please, and his name is Daryl." And darn she could feel her cheeks heat up.
"Well in spite of those cuts and bruises he appears to be a strong and healthy man. I think it may be time for you to come home."
She took a deep breath, "I'll come home tomorrow Mama. Let's not worry about it anymore right now. I'd like you to try and get to know Daryl and Timmy, they do mean something to me."
He'd carried the extra chair in from his room and they all sat at the small kitchen table for their lunch. Daddy asked Daryl a lot of questions about his work and the things he knew how to do and fix. "Do you have some experience with oil heat?"
"Yeah I do, yours actin' up?"
"About once or twice a winter I seem to have some kind of big trouble. I think maybe it's just got too much age on it."
"I'll come have a look at it next week if ya like."
Beth was so pleased with how painlessly it all appeared to be going. Especially the conversation between her father and Daryl. The two men seemed to be getting along great, discussing every kind of farm equipment and all sorts of other machinery.
Even Mama seemed happy and relaxed. She was involved in conversation with Timmy. It made Beth smile because when the little boy said, "Ma'am" it came out "Man." She was sure Mama was egging that on. Mama got her biggest smile when Beth asked him, "Do you like the chicken Timmy?"
He responded, "Yes tank ya Bef." Mama was grinning ear to ear. "He has such good manners and you daughter have a new name."
Beth teased right back, "Yes I do Man."
Daryl may have won Mama over with two things. First when he said, "Ma'am I ain't had fried chicken since I don't even know when. I don't know how ta make it myself. But whenever I did have it, it was never this good. Thank ya for bringin' it to us."
Beth saw her Mama's cheeks turn pink as she smiled at him, "You're very welcome, it was my pleasure."
The next thing he did she knew he hadn't even given any thought to, it was just him. He stood and began to clear the table, her Mama got up to help with the dishes and he told her, "No Ma'am, that ain't fair. Ya cooked it so me an Timmy's gonna do the cleanup. Ain't that right Timmy?"
"Yes Daddy."
"That's very nice Daryl and thank you Timmy. Are you a good helper?"
"Yes Man."
Daddy tried to look stern when he said, "You two fellas are making me look bad."
Two things happened after lunch that took away any doubt Mama or Daddy may have about feelings between this man and their daughter.
Beth had told him she'd lay Timmy down for his nap while Daryl and her father put their coats on, and he and Daddy went to have a look at the shop.
Mama watched from the hall as her daughter took the little boy to the bathroom, helped him wash his hands and then held his little hand as she walked him the short distance to his room. The love was hard to miss. Mama was leaning against the doorjamb as Beth tucked the little boy in bed and sang him a song. Her girl told him, "You have a nice rest now Timmy and dream happy dreams. I love you." And she kissed the little boy. The child then put his tiny hand on her daughter's face and said, "Yuve Bef."
Mama knew.
Out in the shop Daryl was showing Daddy his tools and they were talking about hunting and fishing, and then Daddy came right out and asked, "So what's going on with you and my daughter Daryl?"
He'd definitely caught the man off guard, but Daryl smiled, "Well there ain't nuthin' goin' on quite yet. But I ain't gonna tell ya I don't wanna have sumthin' goin' on. I like your daughter very much, I respect her too. I want ya ta know that part. I got feelin's for her an I think, I hope she's got feelin's for me too."
"I see. What about the boy's Mama? How's she going to feel about another woman around her child?"
"His Mama's passed, long time ago."
"Well I'm sorry to hear that."
"Yeah thank ya. Just so ya know, I ain't in this ta find a Mama for my son. He's mine ta care for an always will be."
Daddy nodded, "Well it sure seems to me you're doing a fine job at that. He's quite the little fella. A real charmer. He's got my wife and daughter both wrapped around his little finger."
Daryl just smiled, 'I'ma have ta ask him how he does that."
Daddy clapped him on the shoulder, "I think you've already managed it."
As much as he thought of Daryl and his son, Daddy did tell the man, "I'll expect my daughter home tomorrow. Alright?"
"Yessir, I understand." Although he didn't like it he did understand.
When Mama hugged Beth goodbye she told her the same, "I'll see you at home in time for lunch tomorrow, understand?"
"Ye Mama I'll be there." She did understand but she wasn't happy.
When they'd driven off Daryl surprised her, wrapping his arms around her he said, "Damn Beth we run outta excuses for ya ta stay."
"I don't even want to think about it." He felt as bad as she did, although he did like hearing she was so reluctant to go.
ooo00ooo
Mama hadn't taken home the leftovers and so they snacked on those for dinner. Being completely unaware of the situation Timmy had a much better appetite than either Daryl or Beth. They couldn't get their minds off two things, the conversation they'd have after Timmy went to bed, and the fact that she'd be leaving the next morning.
They were seated on the sofa with Timmy between them and Daryl asked her with a smile, "So do ya think Timmy's stinky tonight?"
She wasn't sure what he was up to but she made a point of sniffing the little boy's hair, "No not really he kind of smells like fried chicken, but I like fried chicken so it's good."
"Well then maybe he don't need a bath tonight an we can all watch a cowboy movie."
Timmy was already clapping his little hands and Beth was holding in a laugh, "I think we could for tonight, and I've been wanting to watch a cowboy movie all week."
"Whaddya think Shadow? Would ya be all sad if ya didn't get ta have your bath an ya had ta watch a cowboy movie?"
Timmy crawled right up in his Daddy's lap and got practically nose to nose, "Moobie pwease."
"Well alright then Son ya win this one."
She recognized the movie right away, "This is one of my Daddy's favorites."
"See there? I knew your Daddy was a smart man."
They both tucked Timmy in and Beth told him a story before they kissed him and told the little boy they loved him. When they left the room Daryl stopped, placed his hands on her shoulders and asked, "Beth, ya got tears in your eyes, what's wrong."
She buried her face in his chest and his hand came up to caress the back of her head, "What?"
"This is the last time I get to tuck him in." He hadn't thought about it until she said that, he wrapped his arms around her and whispered, "We're gonna miss ya so much Beth. We're gonna have ta figure this all out. But it just ain't gonna be the same with you livin' there an us livin' here."
ooo00ooo
The little boy had fallen asleep quickly and just as they'd planned they went to his room. Daryl shut the door just in case. There were things he didn't want Timmy to hear.
They sat on the bed together with the pillows propped up behind them, legs stretched out in front of them and hands clasped. "I'm sorry ya can't stay longer. Been so nice ta have ya here Beth for me an for Timmy. Ya made everythin' seem more special."
"I don't want to go but I know it's what's right. Mama and Daddy were expecting me for Christmas Eve and Christmas. Tomorrow will be December 30th and I'm still not home."
"Went by fast didn't it? Next week me an Timmy's gonna be back ta work, that's bad really. It's not I don't like ta work, I do an so does Timmy. It's that I took this time off thinkin' he an I would do some hikin', shoot the bows, maybe even fish if it wasn't too cold. We didn't get none a that done between the weather an my clumsy ass."
"I don't think it was your clumsiness. And you still have the weekend maybe the weather will turn warmer. I don't know what I'm going to do, look for secretarial work I guess. Maybe I'll take a couple of classes and try to learn some other skills, bookkeeping or something like that."
"I don't think there's anythin' ya can't do Beth, and damn girl you're tough. Ya got that thing, that inner strength they call it. The way ya took care a me you was sumthin' an just jumpin' right in an carin' for Timmy the way ya done. I could never repay ya for that."
"You did save my life and my car and you've fed me well and kept me warm, I'd say we're even. So now, are we just going to share pleasantries and exchange compliments or are you going to tell me who Timmy really is."
"How'd ya figure that out? That he wasn't born ta me?"
"I don't know it's just a feeling I had. It sure doesn't have anything to do with how much you love him or how well you take care of him. He couldn't find a better Daddy." He squeezed her hand then.
And then he began to tell the story, "It was a Saturday mornin' an I's in the shop. I'd just changed the oil in the work truck when I heard the motorcycle from a ways off an comin' my way. I knew it had ta be my brother, Merle. Sure enough pretty soon he pulled up here. There was a woman with him. I'd seen her before. They were pretty regular. Maybe not love but they were the same kind of people an they found comfort in each other I guess."
"They got off the Bike and she seemed kinda awkward when she did. He come over ta me an said, 'Hey little brother what ya doin'?' I said, 'What's it look like Merle? I'm workin' what the fuck you doin'?' I's mad I could see he was loaded, higher n kite first thing in the mornin' an ridin' a motorcycle. Hell he lived in Atlanta he rode a couple hours ta get here."
"He said, 'Now is that any way ta talk ta your brother? I brung ya a present ya get ta keep it too. I can't take care of it an she won't. So we're given it ta you.' That was when she walked over ta me an Merle unzipped her coat an there was tiny baby. Real tiny. They'd taken that baby all the way from Atlanta like that on the back of a motorcycle. Merle took the little fella from her arms an put him in my arms, 'He's all yours little brother his name's Cornelius.' Then he handed me an envelope an said, 'Here's his papers.' I said ta him, ya can't just give away babies ya dumb ass. He just laughed an she handed me her backpack."
"They got back on that bike an they was gone. I s'pose I coulda put him right back in her arms or his arms or done sumthin' but I made a mistake, I looked at him. I knew then I's gonna take care of him as best I could, an wasn't no one ever gonna hurt him if I could help it. He was like me, alone. He needed me an I needed him."
"But shit I sure didn't know nuthin' bout babies. All that was in the pack was one bottle, one little gown an one diaper. Even I knew that wasn't gonna be enough. I went in the house with him an I laid him on a little blanket near my desk. I looked at the paper an then I knew how old he was. I washed up quick an got him in the truck. We had ta drive 40 miles ta one a them big ol stores, WalMart it was. I's worried cuz I didn't have no car seat, but what could I do?"
"I got there an I just held him in one arm an I pushed a cart with the other. I got ta the baby section an shit I's baffled, I just stood there lookin' around. Here come a young Mama had a tiny baby in one a them slings on her chest and a little fella sittin' in the seat a the cart. She looked at me kinda laughed an said, 'New Daddy, huh?' I said, yes Ma'am an I need help. His Mama's gone an I don't know what I need."
"She looked at me laid a hand on my arm an said, 'lemme help.' She did, she picked out bottles an diapers an formula an blankets an some little clothes an a car seat. She told me I should go ta this baby exchange store. She said I could get all what I needed like a bed an high chair, all that just lightly used. She told me ta go home an look on the internet, I could get a lotta information about babies an how ta care for 'em. I give her my card told her ta call me I owed her an her husband some work. Anyway like a lotta folks with a new baby I had ta find my way."
"My cell phone rang the next mornin', it was the hospital down in Marietta askin' me was I a relation ta Merle Dixon, I said he's my brother. They told me he was in their intensive care an that if I wanted ta see him again I should come. Me an Timmy went an said our goodbye. Timmy's Mama had been killed instantly. Merle was drunk, high, they hit a retainin' wall. It was lucky they didn't kill no one else."
Beth had tears rolling down her cheeks as she clasped his hand more tightly, "My God Daryl, I'm so sorry I, I, I'm almost speechless really. So what happened? I mean obviously you changed Timmy's name, but what about the rest of it?"
"Well I never did call him by nuthin' but Timmy, I don't know why but it sounded like a good name. I figured he'd have a better shot on the playground havin' a name like Timmy 'stead a Cornelius. Anyway, I didn't have no choice. Well that ain't true, I coulda got a baby tender I s'pose, but I didn't feel right ta leave the little fella with anyone. I figured he belonged with me so I just took him with me on the job."
"At that time I's workin' on a real big house, 6,000 square feet. A vacation retreat was how the guy called it. It was a big deal lawyer from down in Atlanta that was havin' me do the work. He'd heard about me from another fella an he hired me. He'd come by a couple a times an checked on things an we got along fine an all. But about a week after Timmy came to be with me he come out ta the lake an seen I had him there.
He started ta have a little fit, said he'd be liable if anythin' happened ta the boy. I said well then I's sorry but I had ta quit, he was mine ta care for an I wasn't leavin' him with no one else. I said I wouldn't charge him for nuthin'."
"He says 'Hey now c'mon what's goin' on Dixon? You didn't have that baby before.' An I don't know why cuz I ain't the type ta tell my business or be open about nuthin', but I knew he was a lawyer an I knew I probably needed advice. So I told him the story. He asked me did I have the birth certificate, I said I did an I also had a letter my brother an his woman signed, sayin' they was given me the baby. He asked did I know anything about the baby's Mama. I said I didn't except once Merle did tell me she grew up in foster care, didn't have no family."
"The long an short of it is he had his investigator check it out an sure enough, she didn't have no relatives. He did all the legal stuff an I got ta adopt Timmy all fair an square. I even got ta change his name, it's Timothy James Dixon. I thought that sounded good. I traded the lawyer for his help, did all the work on that house, heating, A/C an all. That was a lotta duct work Timmy an I done. Best trade I ever made. He's my boy an not just in my heart, ain't no one ever gonna take him away from me."
She was crying harder now, "The whole story is so beautiful and so tragic and I'm just overwhelmed with so many emotions. I have one more question about that, will you ever tell Timmy?"
"Nah, I mean I'll tell him about Merle and her someday when he's bigger, but I'll never tell him what they done, that they just gave him away like that. He don't need the hurt. He'll feel bad enough ta know his Daddy and Mama died in a accident. Folks around here they don't ask but I know what they think. I overheard sumthin' one day at the hardware, a couple talkin' in the next aisle. Story was I had a woman an she had Timmy, she died in childbirth an now I'm raisin' him alone." He snorted out a laugh then, "Who the hell starts these damn stories anyway? I guess it don't matter cuz I ain't ever tellin' nuthin'. It'll be Timmy's ta decide who he tells."
"What about you Beth? What if we was ta get sumthin' more goin' between us? Have ya thought about what all that would mean? Ya wouldn't just be takin' on a man, you'd be takin' on a child. It ain't easy, an there's plenty a guys out there that don't have no kids. Would ya really wanna be with a man that does?"
They looked in each other's eyes for what seemed a very long time, until finally she answered his question, "I would want that with the right man and the right curly haired little boy."
She smiled as she moved her hand to the side of his face and then her fingers into his hair. She didn't speak and he didn't speak, he just moved his hand to the side of her face and then his fingers wove into her hair, until his hand was caressing her head. He brought her face close to his as he leaned down and their lips met.
ooo00ooo
Chapter 8: Chapter 8
Summary:
Chapter Text
ooo00ooo
They held the kiss for what seemed a very long time but still not quite long enough. As he pulled away his head flopped back on the pillow and his arm lay across his forehead, "Ya know he's been real good an all while ya been here but it ain't always that way. He can get cranky an downright hardheaded. He's made some messes I didn't think anyone that small was capable a makin'. Whaddya gonna think when he cries all night with a earache or pees on ya in the bed? Ya still gonna like him then?"
"Are you trying to scare me off or talk me out of liking him? Or do you doubt I'm capable of loving him when he's less than perfect?"
His expression turned very serious as he looked in her eyes, "Nah it means a lot that ya care for him so much. I'm just warnin' ya it can get real with him. He can get ta actin' like me a whole lot more'n I wish he would. But that's different, he's my boy an I don't never stay mad at him for long."
She looked at him with just the hint of a smile while laying her hand lightly on his cheek. "That's what people do when they love each other Daryl. They forgive those little things, the day to day nuisances and differences that come up and they concentrate on what's important, the love. I can't imagine I'd be so cold or so shallow as to just walk away from Timmy because he was up all night crying with an earache."
"That's cuz ya got a gentle a nature an you're sweet like that." Now his hand was on her cheek and his blue eyes were staring hard into hers, "When me n your Daddy was out in the shop he asked me what was goin' on between you an me."
"You're kidding. What did you say?"
"I told him the truth. I said wasn't nuthin' goin' on yet but that I wanted sumthin'. That's when he said he wanted ya ta come home." He stopped and smiled at her before continuing, "Then he asked real nice an all, but he asked me how Timmy's Mama was gonna feel about another woman bein' round her child. I just told him Timmy's Mama had died. He didn't ask no more about it. But Beth ya gotta know if things go the way I hope they do, they're gonna ask more questions. An for now ya know they're thinkin' I's a married man an all."
"Daryl you told me the story in confidence and I said I wasn't going to tell. Even though I love my folks that includes not telling them. Whatever they learn about Timmy they're going to learn from you."
"Well if things get serious we're gonna have ta tell 'em the truth. It would be right that they'd know."
The tone of her voice was low and tender, "I know that what happened with your brother hurt you. I'm so sorry for you and for him and for Timmy's Mama." She moved her hand to his hand then and gently squeezed it, "Your brother may have had his troubles but when he left, he left you with something so precious."
He didn't respond except to tightly purse his lips and nod his head once, while weaving his fingers through hers and gently squeezing her hand.
A change of subject seemed like a good idea so she asked another of her questions, "I'm curious why, and you can say it's none of my business, but I've noticed you haven't had visitors at all while I've been here."
That brought a smile to his face, "I been thinkin' how ya must feel about bein' kinda remote out here, like we're cut off from the world. It really ain't like that or at least I don't think it is. Folks visit an all, me an Timmy ain't so ornery that no one comes round. But have ya noticed what the weather's been like? I figure everyone's been layin' low with the cold an such, an most folks knew I's takin' time off ta spend with him. We had a few callers the week before Christmas. We both got us some new gloves an Timmy got them slippers Miz Horvath knit for him. We got more canned stuff an we got a real good loaf a cinnamon raisin bread, that was Timmy's favorite. My favorite was a casserole, chicken n rice."
"This callin' on folks, it was all new ta me when I moved out here. Folks bein' neighborly an all. At first when they'd come round it made me uneasy til I seen they was just bein' friendly. I still ain't one ta go callin' on them, not unless I know someone's sick an might need help. It's just not sumthin' I know much about, we never did that sorta thing when I's growin' up. No one wanted to or dared ta come callin' on my Dad. But that don't mean I wouldn't try n learn."
He suddenly started to laugh and it was a real laugh.
"What? What's so funny?"
"When I done all the work for the folks I bought this place from, well I guess they talked me up pretty good. Anyway I'd hear from some neighbor an they'd invite me ta Sunday dinner an such. I felt strange goin' but I's tryin' ta meet folks an get customers, an I sure didn't wanna be makin' no one mad. So I'd go." And his laughter continued.
She was smiling to see him laugh, "You're killing me Daryl, what's so funny?"
"There was a few times I'd go an there'd be a woman there I didn't know. Someone's niece or granddaughter or a girl they knew from the bank, like that. I didn't get it really the first time it happened, even the second time. Hell I guess I just didn't know enough ta think a thing of it. Then the third time it happened ta me the woman, her name's Tara an she's a friend a mine still. Anyway she asks me out ta the porch an she tells me, 'You're slow aren't ya?' an I must be cuz I get a little pissy with her an I say, 'What's your problem?' an she laughs right at me an says, 'We're bein' set up Daryl.' I still didn't get it. She had ta explain it ta me, an then she told me I's fresh meat."
Beth laughed along with him but she also felt just a little jealous, "So you had lots of dates huh?"
He looked at her with a wide grin, "Yeah that's me alright a real backwoods lady's man. I never dated any of 'em, I never did really date ever. I ain't gonna pretend or lie ta ya Beth, I been with women an I even hung out with some a while. Sometimes things went here an there but I never did have what you'd call a girlfriend or a regular woman. Once Timmy come ta be with me I never had nuthin' ta do with any woman at all. I just spent my time on him."
"Truth is Beth I never have known a woman like you, a woman I felt like I wanted ta have sumthin' more with. I just ain't sure how we're gonna do this thing when ya ain't here with me. Do I just call ya an ask ya ta the movies or out ta eat? Do ya come over here? Hell I don't know the first thing about any of it an that's the truth. An there's Timmy, ya know I don't leave Timmy with no one 'cept you. An what about you? Ya had a lotta experience datin' rednecks with children?"
It was her turn to laugh, "No you'll officially be my first redneck date. I wanted to start with the most handsome backwoods lady's man I could find, one with a sweet little curly haired son."
"What about guys? Ya had a lotta boyfriends have ya? A woman like ya are probably has ta fight em off huh?"
He may be acting like he was joking but she could tell he wanted to know. "I had a boyfriend all through high school, he was a farm boy and I was a farm girl. We were young and mostly innocent and I think we thought we loved each other, but it was just kids trying to be grown up. That's the way high school was, it seemed like everyone was pairing up. He and I didn't last long after graduation. He's happily married to someone else now and still living on his folks' farm. Besides Jimmy, that was his name, I've dated but I've never run into 'that guy.' There is a man I've recently met and I'm very interested to see if he may be that guy."
He just smiled as he wove his fingers into her hair and they kissed and held onto one another, and soon they were asleep.
At four she was awakened by a dream and she panicked just a little then hurried to leave his bed. She wanted to be in the other bedroom when Timmy woke. Her movements had awakened him and they shared one more deep kiss and tight hug. "I'll see you for breakfast Mister Dixon."
When they finished breakfast she cleaned the kitchen while Daryl and Timmy went out to check on her car and make sure everything was okay. She peeked out the window smiling as she watched Daryl washing the vehicle and teasing Timmy, just like he'd done when he washed his work truck. She couldn't help her emotions and her eyes filled with tears thinking how much she'd miss both those boys.
She made herself busy packing and tidying up, while he made himself busy checking her oil and tire pressure and vacuuming the cars' interior. He was always careful to show Timmy what he was doing and explain why he was doing it. The little boy looked so serious as he tried very hard to understand the things his Daddy told him.
She was packed and ready when they came back in through the mudroom, discarding their wet coats and dirty boots.
She stood in the hall watching as they did and Daryl walked right to her, taking her in his arms and holding on tightly as he whispered, "I hate this Beth. I'll call an ya can tell me what ta do an when I'm s'posed ta do it, if I should come over or take ya someplace or if ya wanna come here. K?"
She whispered back, "Okay. I hate it too. I don't want to leave you and Timmy."
That's when she felt the little boys' arms suddenly wrap tightly around her leg, and she looked down to see his cheek pressed firmly against her. "No Bef no." She marveled at how he knew, but then Mama always told her children pick up on everything.
She ran her hand through his curls trying to reassure him while she was fighting her own sadness. "It's going to be alright Timmy we're going to see each other very soon."
The little boy started to cry and his Daddy lifted him up and held him close, smoothing his hair from his face and wiping at the tears with his thumb, "It's okay Shadow we'll see Beth again real soon, I promise." But the child wasn't consoled and Daryl looked to her, "He'll calm down when ya go. Text me when ya get there just so I know you're safe, k? Be real careful. We're gonna miss ya round here, a lot."
She was trying so hard to keep her own emotions in check, she didn't want the little boy to see she was as upset as him. But when he held his little arms out crying hard and in a pleading voice said, "Bef, Bef," she'd swear she could feel her heart break right in two.
She leaned in and kissed him, "I love you Timmy I'll see you very soon, I promise. Bye Daryl." She kissed him on the cheek and hurried out the door.
She drove just far enough to be out of site of the little house before she pulled over and had a good cry.
ooo00ooo
Mama had never doubted her daughter's story about the car going off the road and the Good Samaritan coming to her rescue. And she never even considered asking her to try and come home until the weather cleared. She and Daddy were sad and disappointed they couldn't have Christmas Eve and Christmas with their girl, but more than that they were relieved she was safe.
However when the weather had cleared and Beth called to say she couldn't come home as expected, that somehow the man had been hurt working on her car, Mama got a little suspicious. It just didn't quite ring true. If the man had a family why weren't they caring for him? Why would they want this woman who was a stranger really, caring for their loved one? And then there was the sound of Beth's voice when she told the story, something about the tone of it. Mama had always been able to tell when her daughter was telling a fib. The girl was the world's worst liar.
She and Daddy had a talk about it. It wasn't that Mama thought Beth was in danger but something was definitely up and she and Daddy agreed, it was time to find out just what that was.
It wasn't at all usual behavior for their daughter that's why they had their suspicions it might be a man. Especially when Mama called her early in the morning to say they were coming for lunch. She knew she'd caught her daughter completely by surprise and the girl was obviously flustered.
On the drive home from Daryl's Hershel and Annette talked. She asked her husband what he thought of Daryl Dixon. "I'm trying to be careful about making a decision too soon Annette. In the beginning of his relationship with Maggie I didn't take Glenn seriously. It took me longer than it should have to learn what a good man he is. I'm trying to be a little more open minded about Daryl. I'd say my first impression was he's a little unpolished, not that it makes him a bad person I guess it just surprised me a little, I always thought Beth liked clean cut fellows. It seems to me he's a good man who wants to live a very simple kind of life. He definitely knows about machinery of every type and takes pride in doing things the right way. That says something about the person he is. I was mighty impressed with the way he's got that place fixed up. I remember what it looked like a few years ago so I know he's not afraid of a challenge or hard work. I did come right out and ask him what was going on with him and Beth."
His last remark almost made Mama forget everything else he'd said, "Oh my golly Hershel you didn't! What did he say?"
Now Daddy was laughing a little, maybe his wife didn't believe in prying but that didn't mean she didn't like knowing. "He said nothing was going on, not yet anyway. But he's hopeful there will be. He said he likes her and he respects her. Then I asked him about the little fellas' Mama, what was she going to think of another woman around her child?"
"My goodness you've gotten to be quite the inquisitor, so what did he say to that?
"He said the boy's Mama had passed. He didn't elaborate and I didn't push. But he also wanted to make it clear he wasn't looking for a Mother for the little boy. Did Beth say anything?"
"Oh my, what a shame, a widower and that poor little fella losing his Mama." Mama shook her head side to side just thinking of such a tragic thing. "Beth didn't volunteer anything except that him and the little boy were important to her. But Hershel she didn't really have to say anything. I just had to look at her eyes when she looked at him. I've never seen her look at anyone that way. I saw the way he looked at her too; you know the way a man looks at a woman he's got feelings for. If nothing has happened in the romance department yet I don't think it'll be long now. Having the little one there is probably the only thing keeping them on their best behavior. That was something else I saw Hershel, the way she put that little boy down for his nap and told him she loved him, and he said it to her too. They all act like a little family. I'm pretty sure this is out of our hands, but it will be nice for us to have her home, at least for a while."
Mama laughed as she said to Daddy, "I've never had anyone call me 'Man,' but coming out of that sweet little face I kind of liked it. As for Daryl he isn't the kind I would have ever imagined our daughter with either, but I do like him. Under that rough exterior I think he's kind and humble, but he also has the proper amount of pride in his home and his child. I just wish he'd cut his hair but then I wish you'd cut yours too. I swear I'm going to start braiding it for you soon."
ooo00ooo
Daryl was able to cheer the little guy up some by taking him and the crossbows to the yard. He set up a target for Timmy and one for himself and they took turns shooting their bows. Every time Timmy's little sponge arrow hit anywhere near his target he jumped up and down with excitement an yelled, "Gots it Daddy!"
"Ya sure did Shadow, 'fore ya know it you'll be bringin' home supper." It was a fun distraction but it didn't really take Daryl's mind off of her. He didn't think there was anything that could take his mind off her.
He made them lunch but he wasn't hungry. What he was was confused, sad and missing her. To add to that when he laid Timmy down for his nap the child asked for her in such a pitiful little voice, "Bef Daddy."
"I know Shadow I miss her too. I promise we're gonna see her soon."
He sat on the bed next to his son until he was asleep, then he started pacing while his mind was working.
ooo00ooo
She got to the farm and Mama and Daddy greeted her with the customary hugs and love. Mama noticed it right away, "Bethie, Honey you've been crying. Why?"
She was trying to control her emotions, she didn't want to start crying again. "It was hard to leave Mama, Timmy was crying so hard. But I did want to come stay with you, I really did it was just all so hard."
Mama put her arm around her daughter's shoulder, "I know Honey, I know."
Beth carried her case, the box with her personal items and the box with her clothes up to her room. The box with the few kitchen items she owned she took to the storage shed. Daddy wanted to help but she told him "no" she could do it. Mostly she just wanted something to do to try and take her mind off things.
By the time she'd made the three trips up the stairs and the one to the shed it was time to help Mama with lunch. She wished there was more to help with. She cut the biscuit dough and got the pan in the oven, set the table and poured the tea, and then carried the big pot of beef, vegetable and noodle soup to the table.
When they were seated for lunch she saw things hadn't changed at all on the farm, Daddy said the blessing and Mama ladled out the soup. There was comfort in the routine and comfort in the goodness of her parents. It was nice to be home with them, it had been so long and she did love and appreciate them so much. And Mama's soup was just the comfort food she needed.
Even though her heart was feeling heavy she tried her best to act happy and be positive, "Mama I've missed your cooking so much. There were plenty of times while I was living in Atlanta, I'd have given anything for a bowl of your soup and one of your biscuits."
Daddy nodded, "I never understood why you stayed in the city so long. How can a person live in that rat race?"
That made her smile, "Well Daddy lots of people love the fast pace I just don't think we're cut out for it."
She helped Mama clean up and then decided what she needed was a walk around the farm. That ought to help calm her.
When she was out of earshot they looked at each other, "My gosh Hershel I have never seen her mope like this. I thought she'd be a miserable young lady when she and Jimmy broke up, but that didn't even seem to faze her. I can't believe she's only known Daryl and Timmy a few days and she's already so, well I don't even know what you call it."
"She's smitten Annette, like one of those lovesick characters in an old 1930's melodrama."
Once he'd loved Timmy awake from his nap he mumbled out loud, "Screw it, I ain't fightin' it no more."
Beth was in the barn brushing Nellie when she heard the truck pull up in the drive. She ran toward it with an ear to ear grin. Mama and Daddy just stood on the big front porch smiling at each other as Daddy said, "Well I guess Daryl's a little lovesick himself. How long did he last Annette? Not quite four hours?" They turned and watched the scene before them unfold.
It may have been a little shock to their system when they saw the man wrap her up in his arms, and give her the kind of kiss you don't typically give a woman while her folks are looking on. They didn't fail to notice their daughter was both receptive and responsive to that kiss.
It was little Timmy that broke the spell, "Bef! Bef!" He was jumping on the seat of the truck and holding his arms out to her. Their daughter took the little boy and held him close, smiling and laughing. Daddy looked at Mama, shrugged his shoulders and remarked, "Well I guess that took away any doubt we might have had."
But Daryl did try to present a viable story as he approached her parents. He nodded his head to Mama, "Miz Greene," and he shook Daddy's hand, "I told ya I'd come have a look at that furnace for ya, today seemed like as good a day as any."
Daddy did his best to go along nodding his head and responding, "I appreciate it Daryl. Let me just show you where that furnace is located son."
Beth smiled at him, "I'll take Timmy with me. I have some animals I want to introduce him to."
She took the little boy to meet Nellie first, "This horse is very big and strong and sometimes she's not so nice. You can only come see her when I'm with you, okay?"
"K Bef." She picked him up and let him pet the horse and play with the hair of her mane. She could see he was fascinated by the big animal but also a little fearful. They didn't stay with the horse long, "Let's go see the milk cow Timmy I bet she'd like to meet you."
She ended up taking the little guy all over the farm, they visited the chickens, walked through the orchard and even took a walk to the pond. "Now this is something else you can only do if Daddy or me are with you. The water is pretty but it can be dangerous, okay?"
"Yes Bef." She smiled trying hard to imagine him hardheaded and ornery like his Daddy said he could be.
They'd been gone a long while when they finally headed back to check on Daryl and Hershel. She heard him tell her Daddy, "I think I got it so's ya can get another two winters outta it at least, but you're gonna probably need ta think about gettin' a new furnace sometime soon."
That's when Beth learned just how the barter system worked, "Well I appreciate you getting it working for us for now. I suppose I'll be having you check on a new one before too long. So what do I owe you for today?"
"Nah Sir I won't take your money an I didn't do much anyway."
"That's not quite true Daryl I watched how hard you worked and you've been at it a long time. Just because you and my daughter are friends doesn't mean I don't expect to pay you."
Daddy could tell by the set of the the man's jaw and the tone in his voice there was no point to argue, "I understand Sir it's just that I don't never take money from older people, it's just a rule I got for myself. I appreciate it an all but ya keep your money an ya lemme know right away if ya got more trouble. I'll take care of it."
"Well if you won't take money then you'll take a gallon of fresh milk, a gallon of apple juice and some home canned preserves, peaches, applesauce and green beans."
"Sounds just right Sir an real generous. Timmy an me will enjoy all that."
That's when Mama came around and said, "Now Daryl you've been working hard all afternoon I'm expecting you and Timmy to stay for supper."
"I appreciate that Ma'am but we don't wanna make a nuisance outta ourselves."
"Don't be silly we're happy you're here, we were getting kind of tired of looking at Beth's long face."
"Mama!" But as embarrassed and red-faced as she was Beth couldn't help but laugh. Daryl just smiled her way, happy to know she'd missed him like he'd missed her.
He was nervous about having supper with her Daddy and Mama. He'd had meals with several people but these people were Beth's parents, and he worried he'd somehow screw something up. He took Timmy in the bathroom to wash up for dinner and reminded him, "Ya be real good now Shadow an ya mind your manners, k?"
"Yes Daddy."
"That's my good boy an Daddy's gonna try an be a real good boy too, k?"
Her Mama had fixed pork chops, potatoes and gravy, glazed carrots and of course biscuits. "Everythin's real good Miz Greene, thanks for invitin' Timmy an me ta share the meal."
He was proud when his son said, "Tank ya Man." Beth looked right at Mama and saw how she was working to hold in that laugh.
"You're very welcome. Thank you both so much for joining us."
He insisted that he and Timmy help with the cleanup and when it was done Mama told him, "Why don't you leave Timmy to watch a program with Hershel and me, you and Beth can have some privacy in the front parlor."
He hadn't expected it but when Timmy seemed happy to sit on the couch between the older couple, he agreed.
He took her hand as they sat on the small sofa that he was sure got little use, "I hope ya ain't mad that I just come over unexpected an all. I just wanted ta see ya."
She smiled as she reached for his hand, "Have I been acting like I minded at all? The only other time I've been that happy to see someone was when Mama picked me up after my first day of kindergarten."
He was laughing and he hugged her, "I bet ya was a sweet an shy little thing, wasn't ya?"
"Maybe I was but I toughened up a lot since then."
"I told ya before you're stronger than ya know. I seen it in ya right away."
The kissing started then and when he finally pulled his lips away for just a moment he whispered to her, "I don't think I'll ever get enough a kissin' ya Beth."
They heard the footsteps coming their way and tried to straighten up and look innocent. Mama looked in smiling. "I'm afraid that little man of yours couldn't last for the whole program Daryl, he's sound asleep."
Daryl stood quickly, "I'm sorry Ma'am I shoulda took him home right after supper."
"Don't be sorry we enjoyed having him, we haven't had a little boy sitting on the couch with us in quite a few years."
Beth helped him bundle Timmy up and buckle him in his car seat. The air was frosty cold but that didn't stop them from lingering by the door of the truck as they shared a goodbye kiss. "I'll call ya an see ya real soon, k?"
"I can't wait."
New Year's Eve Morning
She was up early helping Mama with the cooking. First thing was making the pies. Mama liked to have pies handy when good friends stopped by. They always had lots of visitors and folks dropping in on New Year's Eve or New Year's Day just to give good wishes. Mama would put out a big spread and she liked to send their closest friends home with one her pies.
After they'd made the pies they started on the traditional Southern New Year's meal, enough of it to feed an army. There would be smothered pork roast, black eyed peas, collard greens and turnip greens, southern fried cabbage, hoppin' john and cornbread. And of course for dessert Mama's special banana pudding.
"Mama how many more years do you plan to do all of this?"
Her Mama looked shocked her girl would even ask such a question, "Well daughter I'm a southern country woman I'll be doing this until the day I can't do it anymore. Then you'll do it." She smiled as she patted her daughter's shoulder.
Like most Mother's, Beth's Mama had an uncanny ability to read her child. She knew her daughter was missing Daryl Dixon and his little boy. But she was being a sweet uncomplaining daughter as she helped prepare the big meal.
By three they had the dining room table opened to its full length with warming trays and chafing dishes piled high with the feast they'd made. Beth was just on her way upstairs to change into something a little nicer. They knew their visitors would start to come by soon. Mama called after her, "Pack a little overnight bag."
Beth was confused as she looked at her Mother, "What?"
"You'll need a little bag to take to Daryl's. I'll expect you, him and Timmy back here tomorrow to wish your Daddy and me a Happy New Year."
Beth ran to the woman her hugging her close, "Oh Mama thank you I love you so much. Happy New Year Mama."
"Alright go on now and hurry before I change my mind."
While she did Mama had packed up a cooler full of food for her to take. "I'll expect all of you for the noon meal tomorrow."
"I promise Mama." She kissed her Mama, went in her Daddy's office and kissed him, wished him a Happy New Year and hurried to her car.
He and Timmy were out working in the yard when she pulled in. You'd think it had been a year since they'd all seen each other.
ooo00ooo
Chapter 9: Chapter 9
Summary:
Chapter Text
ooo00ooo
New Year's Eve
She'd just shut the engine down when Daryl pulled her car door open and Timmy was practically crawling in her lap, "Bef!"
She felt the smile stretch across her face, "Well hello to you Timmy! Did you miss me? I know I sure missed you a lot."
Daryl picked the little guy up, "C'mon now Shadow let Beth get outta the car before ya go on the attack." He was still holding his son close when he extended a hand to help her out. He took her in a one armed hug and was holding onto both of them when he leaned in, kissed her cheek and smiled, "Hey you." Timmy did just like his Daddy, leaning in and kissing her cheek, "You."
She was happy and maybe just a little emotional as she returned their kisses, "My goodness you guys are making me feel so special. I might just leave and come back so we can do this all again." That's when it occurred to her, "I hope it's okay that I just showed up. I'm sorry I probably should have called first."
Daryl pulled her just a little closer, "Stop. We're surprised an real glad ta see ya, can't ya tell we're happy ya come? We was just tossin' the ball around a little, ya wanna join in?"
"Sounds like fun."
It was a child's big and colorful rubber ball and either she or Daryl would throw it underhand to the little boy, but he'd never quite manage to catch it. He'd run to retrieve the ball and then attempt to throw it underhand right back to his Daddy or to her. Seldom getting anywhere close to either of them. It became mostly a game of everyone having to chase the ball. This. All of them playing and laughing, she loved the innocence and simplicity of it and how happy it made Timmy. She noticed something else as well, these playtimes were when Daryl would truly relax and seem almost carefree.
Eventually his Daddy told him, "Okay Shadow we better put the ball up now, we gotta get in an start on supper."
"Oh my gosh I was having so much fun I forgot to tell you, Mama sent dinner. There's a big cooler full of food in the trunk of my car. Mama never fixes a little bit of anything."
She popped the trunk and he reached in to get the cooler while she reached in for her bag. "Nah ya let me get that. How 'bout ya take charge a your little buddy here, make sure he takes them boots off 'fore he goes in? I'll do the carryin'."
She couldn't help it, when she took his boots off she had to rub those tiny feet. "I can't have you walking around here with cold feet Timmy. Why don't you go put your slippers on now and then we'll wash up, okay?"
"K Bef." Before he ran to his room she just had to pull the little boy close to her and hug him tight. When those tiny arms wrapped around her the love she felt was so sweet and pure, it made her smile.
They walked in the kitchen and there was Daryl unpacking the cooler, "The food stayed nice n warm I don't think we're gonna need ta reheat it. An your Mama packed enough for a platoon, there's even a container with a pie in it."
"I told you Mama never fixes just a little bit of anything."
He sent Timmy on an errand to find a rag in the mudroom, but only because he needed a minute to tell her, "I gotta make Timmy's plate before we sit down. The smothered pork has onion gravy, the hoppin' John's got onions an the cabbage has onions. He won't get near an onion, but if he don't see 'em he'll never know they was there. I'ma just get rid of em as best I can. I ain't even gonna try n put them greens on his plate I know better. Besides there's more for me that way," He smiled at her, "But I'ma see if I can slip the cabbage on there. He ain't ever tried it. While I'm sneakin' around pickin' all this onion outta everthin' maybe you can keep him busy readin' a book or sumthin'."
She was smiling big now, "He's like I was when I was little, kind of picky. That's been a while and I don't think Mama thought about cooking special for him. Well I don't think either Mama or me knew I was coming over here until the cooking was already done."
"He must get that picky part from you then," She thought he kind of winked at her as he said it, but he got a little more serious when he continued, "I's always one ta eat whatever I could get my hands on. We didn't have much food. Anyway your Mama shouldn't have ta worry 'bout fixin' special for him."
"Oh she wouldn't worry about it she'd take pleasure in it."
"I think ya got a lotta your Mama in ya Beth. Between the two a ya you're gonna spoil that boy rotten."
"Me and Mama? Are we the ones picking onions out of hoppin' John?"
They were both laughing but he tried hard to pretend he was angry, "Go on now an read your book I'm busy in here!"
"Yes sir Mister Dixon!"
It was fun teasing Daryl and she was enjoying reading with Timmy. But she was also worrying over what he'd said about not getting much to eat growing up. Between that and the scars she still had questions, but they weren't for now. That was a conversation they'd have another time and certainly not when Timmy might hear.
By the time she and the little boy had read the Berenstain Bears book he was calling them to the table.
Timmy went right for the meat and Daryl smiled as his rubbed the child's head, "My boy's a carnivore just like his Daddy." The little guy ate every bite of that meat and then started right in on the hoppin' john. He seemed to like that just fine too as he quickly downed all that was on his plate. The cabbage was a completely different story, he looked at it and then looked at his Daddy almost suspiciously, "What Daddy?"
"It's called cabbage Shadow an it's real good stuff. Daddy cut it up nice an small for ya. Give it a try an if ya don't like it ya ain't gotta eat it. At least try it cuz I think you're gonna think it's real good."
Timmy scooped up a spoonful looked at his Daddy again and then put the bite in his mouth. His face instantly turned sour with his little eyes squinted almost closed. Daryl was trying not to laugh when he told him, "Hurry an wash it down with a big drink a milk." That's just what the little guy did, he took a big drink. What came next came fast and without warning. Timmy had no sooner swallowed the milk than that milk, the bite of cabbage, all the hoppin' John and all the meat came right up and right out of him.
It was all over the table, on the floor and on the little boy. And that little boy was crying hard. Daryl hurriedly slid his chair back grabbed Timmy up and took him over to the sink. He turned to Beth and she was still seated her eyes wide and looking like she was frozen in place. Daryl gave her the side eye and grinned, "Told ya it can get real with him. Happy New Year."
She jumped up then, "Okay, one of us should bathe him and the other one clean this up. Which job do you want?"
"I can handle it all Beth."
"I'm sure you can but I'm not going to let you."
He shook his head and smiled, "Alright Tough Guy, ya take the bathin' I'll take this mess. An Beth, I'm sorry an I know Timmy is too."
She touched his arm, "It'll be fine Daryl."
She tried to calm the little boy by singing to him while she got his clothes off and filled the tub, finally lifting him in. By then he seemed to be over the whole experience and was having fun splashing in the water. But between the smell of his clothes and what had gotten on her, she wasn't enjoying this quite as much as he was.
She was just folding the Magic Washcloth when Daryl knocked on the door, "Can I come in an get them dirty clothes."
"Yes please." She knew he'd had the far worse cleanup job but he still smiled as he entered the bathroom. "Like I said he makes big messes for someone so small, huh?"
"I won't argue with you on that. I think when he's done in the tub I'd like to have a fast shower myself, if it's okay, if you don't mind."
"A course it's okay an a course I don't mind. I wish you'd just be okay with doin' what ya gotta do around here Beth. An in case ya ain't been able ta tell, I always want ya here with me. Timmy wants ya here too. Ya ain't gotta call or nuthin' like that. I wish you'd just know that. I'll have my shower when you're done." And he was out the door.
She didn't think those words had come easily to him or that for one minute he took them lightly. She already knew him far better than that. If Daryl said it he meant it. She didn't know if he realized how much his words had moved her or how much they meant to her. He'd just told her this was where he wanted her, always. Although it hadn't seemed at all like a romantic moment, she'd felt the pure romance in the meaning of the words he spoke.
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The clothes were in the washer and everyone was bathed and in their pajamas when Beth announced, "It's New Year's Eve we need party hats!"
Daryl was a little reluctant to even ask what this was all about, but he did, "Party hats?"
"Yes we're having our own little New Year's Eve party, just the three of us. Come on, I'll show you." She went to the kindling box and got some newspapers, "Timmy let's go to the kitchen table. I'll show you how to fold this into a pirate's hat okay?"
When it came to the little boy her enthusiasm about things was always contagious, and he proved that by smiling happily as he clapped his hands together and followed her, "Hat Bef." Daryl just followed the two of them waiting to see what little bit of magic she'd be working this time.
She showed them both how to carefully fold and crease the newspaper to make the hat, and Timmy giggled excitedly when she placed it on his head. His little hand was reaching up curious to touch it when his Daddy just scooped him right up and said, "C'mon I'll show ya what a tough lookin' pirate ya make." He looked at himself in the mirror smiling ear to ear and it was obvious he loved his new hat. "Daddy hat."
And Daryl knew there was no getting out of it, "Ya think I need a hat, do ya? I'm really more of snapback kind a guy."
"Daddy hat." Beth was standing in the doorway smiling as she watched them, she couldn't resist, "I think you're right Timmy, Daddy needs a pirate hat. After all you don't want to be the party pooper, right?"
He squinted his eyes at her, "Yeah c'mon Timmy let's get Daddy and Beth a hat too." As he walked by her he whispered, "I bet ya make a damn cute pirate."
Soon they were all seated on the couch in their newspaper hats, Daryl with the TV controller in his hand ready to start the movie. He looked over at her and although he was smiling she could see some worry in his face, "Is this what ya had in mind for a big New Year's Eve Beth? A little pukin', gettin' all fancied up in a newspaper hat, an then some sittin' on the sofa ta watch an old cowboy movie? Pretty excitin' stuff, huh?"
She reached over squeezing his arm, "So far this has been my best New Year's Eve ever, I'm spending it with two of my favorite people."
Timmy chimed in then, "Hungwee Daddy."
"Yeah I bet you're hungry, come ta think of it I didn't get my dinner either. How bout you Beth, ya hungry?"
"As a matter of fact I am."
They opted against anything they'd had earlier and decided on grilled cheese sandwiches, followed by a slice of Mama's apple pie. After they'd all had their meal and cleaned up, they finally settled in to watch their movie. By the time it was over Timmy had been up nearly an hour passed his bedtime.
The little guy had worn his hat while he ate his sandwich, he watched the movie in his hat, brushed his teeth in his hat, and he wanted to sleep in his hat. Seeing how proud he was of it made Beth feel so happy she'd thought to make them. She gently explained to him, "It will get crushed if you sleep in it, it won't look like a pirate hat anymore. I'll tell you what, I'm going to set it right here on the night table and in the morning you can put it right back on, okay?"
He looked a little sad but he reluctantly agreed, "K Bef." She and his Daddy both gave him some sleepy time hugs, told him to have real good dreams and they'd see him in the morning. As soon as they'd given him a Happy New Year kiss the little guy was out almost instantly.
As they walked out of the room Daryl whispered, "That could be it Beth, ya know your new career? You can open a business sellin' newspaper hats." She tried not to give him the satisfaction of laughing as she lightly elbowed his still-sore ribs.
As they made their way in the living room he stopped kind of abruptly, "Shit I just remembered I got sumthin' we can celebrate with."
He scooted a chair over by the kitchen cabinet and climbed up. "I don't have much call for this kinda thing so I keep it way up here. I hope it ain't gone bad." He opened the cabinet to reveal several bottles of wine. He grabbed a bottle and a corkscrew that lay up there with them.
"Look here, this corkscrew has my name engraved right on it," he laughed, "Kinda funny I got all this ain't it? If I'ma drink I mostly stick ta the beer or Jack."
"Let me guess, a trade?"
"Yep. I got a customer over in Murty name's Bob, he's a Physician's Assistant. He has one a them walk-in clinic places. I done quite a bit a work on that for him an at his house too. He pays in real money but he always wants me ta take a bottle a wine. Then he give me that corkscrew after I finished the HVAC for his office."
"I'm fascinated by all of the trading Daryl. It's kind of amazing really and in some ways it seems better than money."
"A lot of it is. Like the food thing, that helps a workin' man out. When someone gives me a big ol' container a soup, a casserole or stew, hell dinner's ready when Shadow an me get home. An the canned goods always come in real handy."
They sat on the couch drinking their wine, not bothering with the TV or the music. They were just enjoying each other and the quiet. He had his arm around her shoulder and she'd laid her head against his chest. He moved just a little so that his chin was resting lightly on her head. "Sorry about the mess earlier, I guess I shoulda known better than ta give it ta him. He can get a touchy stomach like that."
"Daryl please quit worrying about it. I understand, really. I felt a lot worse for him than for myself, believe me. You worry too much that I can't handle him just being the little boy that he is."
He kissed the top of her head and agreed, "Yeah I do but ya always prove me wrong," and he took a swallow of wine.
"And as far as I'm concerned this is a wonderful way to bring in the New Year. I'm sitting with a man I'm pretty crazy about, there's a warm fire going, his arm is around me and we're sipping on wine. I can't seem to find a complaint with any of it."
"What is it ya want Beth?"
"What do I want?"
"Yeah from me, whaddya want?"
It was her turn to step up and she knew that. He'd been very honest with her from the start, and surprisingly willing to share his history, his secrets and his feelings.
"This is all kind of complicated in a way, isn't it? It all seems so strange like we're taking this nice and slow, and at the same time it feels like we've rushed it. It's only been a week Daryl. I've thought a lot about that and wondered how I could already have such deep feelings for you and Timmy. I haven't known you long at all. But what I also thought about was in the four years I dated Jimmy I probably never spent this much 'real' time with him. You know the minute by minute, day to day and hour to hour moments of real, everyday life. The fun stuff like Christmas morning and snowball fights, and the really hard stuff like when I was so scared waiting for you to come home, and then seeing you so hurt."
"I know I want more of this with you, the fun stuff, the everyday stuff and even that not so fun stuff with the messes and the tears. It's life, real life and that's what I hope you and I can have together." She couldn't believe she'd actually had the nerve to tell him what was in her heart, but she did and she was glad she did.
He was emotionally high from her words. She'd stated it all so simply. It was exactly what these past few days had been all about with them. It was about real life, every bit of it. An everyday life that a man, a woman and a small child had been enjoying together.
He set their wineglasses down on the coffee table and took her in his arms, holding her close to him, "I like ta hold ya like this, I like the feel of ya next ta me. It's like you're a part a me. I feel the same as ya said, like I ain't known ya long but like I know ya better'n I know anyone. I seen things in ya right from the start Beth, your heart an your sweetness an your gentle way a bein'. There ain't nuthin' put on about ya, you're what ya appear ta be. An you're the woman I wanna keep close."
He moved to lay her down there on the couch and she made no effort to stop him. He was poised above her and lightly tangling his fingers through her hair. Neither spoke, rather they just looked in each others eyes. Even when he leaned in and began kissing her deeply they still held that look, until his mouth moved down to her neck and he started kissing and tenderly sucking the soft sensitive skin.
He was taking it nice and slow, he had no desire to rush things with her. He felt like he knew her heart and now he wanted to know her body. He wasn't looking for some quick physical release, he wanted so much more than that. He wanted to make love to her. As his lips and tongue moved to the delicate skin of her throat her fingers were weaving through his hair. He heard the soft low sound coming from her, it was almost like a hum. The lilt of it and the response of her body to his told him she was receptive to this physical attention.
He continued kissing and lightly sucking her lips and the skin of her neck and throat, stopping only to softly nibble at her earlobe, his hand slipped under her pajama top. He slid the open palm under her and stroked the skin of her back. Eventually his hand made its way to her side, dipping just a little below the waist of her pajamas. He lightly moved that open palm up and down her soft skin from the the curve of her hip, over the slimness of her waist up to her arm, and slowly back to her hip and over to the low of her back, and then to her abdomen. Repeating these moves as he was slowly moving ever closer to what he sought.
He could feel himself harden and with only the thin pajamas between them he knew she felt it too. He knew by her breathing and the way her body was moving into him, her anticipation matched his. As he found his way she did not make any protest, and ultimately the big rough hand gently engulfed her small breast. He began to tenderly fondle it, as he kissed her mouth in a way that didn't just convey his passion, but somehow was also a physical expression of the feelings he had for her.
He slowly lifted her top revealing her breast, but before he moved his mouth to it he once more kissed her deeply. When his mouth touched her breast she breathlessly moaned, "oh," and her enjoyment of his attentions along with the sensual sounds coming from her, aroused him even more as their foreplay continued.
He didn't let it go much further though. As much as he wanted this with her there was something he wanted to have happen before this. He found it hard to believe himself but he wanted there to be some kind of real commitment between them, at the very least words of love and hopefully far more than that.
He brought her to her pleasure and kissed her again, then pulled the blanket from the back of the couch. He covered them both as he held her close and burrowed his face into her hair. He suddenly remembered, moved his face back enough to kiss her lips and whispered, "Happy New Year Beth." She smiled as her fingers moved the hair away from his eyes and she whispered back, "Happy New Year Daryl."
They feel asleep where they lay and didn't wake until a tiny hand began patting them, "Daddy, Bef." Daryl quickly peeked under the blanket to make sure her pajama top was covering her, and then with one strong arm pulled the little boy up to lay him between them.
As they loved the little boy awake Daryl's hand moved to her cheek and he smiled sleepily, "Are we good Beth? Everything alright?"
"Everything's very good, better than alright."
He looked at her, looked down at Timmy and then back at her, "This right here, this is perfect."
She lightly rubbed the palm of her hand along his arm, "This right here is everything."
ooo00ooo
Chapter 10: Chapter 10
Summary:
Chapter Text
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Before he helped his Daddy stoke the fire Timmy had to rush back to his bedroom and get his pirate hat. Daryl looked at her with that crooked little grin, "I told ya, bein' a hat maker is the career for ya."
She shook her head at him but smiled before turning to go to the kitchen, "I'm seriously considering it."
She'd just set the old percolator on the burner when she felt him move behind her. His arms wrapped around her waist as he softly kissed and nibbled the back of her neck, "I figure I got about 10 seconds ta enjoy this, to enjoy the feel of you before my Shadow comes stormin' in." He had the timing pretty spot on, soon Timmy came running in and saw them embracing. He quickly imitated what he saw, grabbing his Daddy from behind and wrapping his arms around Daryl's leg.
Daryl enjoyed the sweetness for a moment and then laughed as he picked the boy up and set him on the counter, "Alright now Shadow, we're gonna have ta stop all this mornin' lovin' long enough ta get breakfast ready. You're hungry ain't ya?"
"Hungwee pwease."
"Did ya have anythin' in mind Beth?"
"I know you have your very serious pancake rules and all Daryl, but since this is New Year's Day and an official government holiday, I thought that was special enough for peach pancakes. Would anyone be interested?"
"Cakes!"
Daryl squinted his eye but he grinned at her, "Okay hat maker ya got ya a taker. I'll get the bacon goin'."
She let Timmy help her while she gave him step by step instructions, just like his Daddy would do. "Okay now do you think you can stir the batter all by yourself?"
The little boy smiled and nodded excitedly, but as she made to hand him the big spoon his Daddy warned her, "You're gonna wanna be holdin' onto that bowl while he stirs cuz he won't. When them bowls fly offa the counter it ain't no fun at all ta clean up the mess." He spoke like a man with experience.
"I bet, thanks for the warning."
They were in no rush to dress, they didn't have to be at the farm until noon. So once the kitchen was clean they tackled the taking down of the Christmas tree. There wasn't much to it, but with Timmy in charge of ornament removal it took quite a lot longer than it might have otherwise.
His Daddy was holding him up high so he could reach the ones at the top of the tree. The little boy was taking it so seriously, not wanting to tear any of the paper snowflakes they'd made. They were about halfway through the job when there was a knock on the door, Daryl didn't hesitate. He walked right over to answer it in his sleep pants and t-shirt. It was Dale and Erma Horvath and he invited them to come in.
It was then he realized what this must look like. Him in his pajamas, Timmy in his pajamas, but the big surprise for the Horvaths would be Beth standing there in her pajamas. And Beth could feel her face turn pink.
Dale spoke first and he was talking fast, clearly a little uncomfortable, "I'm sorry, we didn't mean to stop by too early. We made this our first call because we know you and Timmy are usually up before the chickens. We wanted to wish you all a Happy New Year. Erma made you a batch of those double fudge brownies you like so well."
Daryl got his wits about him quickly, "Ain't a problem at all an we been up a long time, we was just gettin' the tree down. Anyway you're always welcome ta stop by, ya know that. Thanks a lot for the brownies that's real nice Miz Horvath, Timmy an I appreciate it a lot. Me an Shadow are always glad ta have some a your delicious cookin'. This here is my friend Beth Greene. Beth this is Dale and Erma Horvath." He was trying to remember if he'd ever talked that much and that fast all at once.
She smiled the biggest and brightest smile she could muster up as she tried to look thrilled to meet them. She was pretty sure her face must still be red and she knew her crazy hair was all over the place. She was also just as sure it looked like quite a bit more had happened between her and Daryl than actually had. "It's very nice to meet you both, Daryl speaks so highly of you. Can we offer you coffee, lemonade or sweet tea?" That's when she realized she was making it sound like it was her house and she was the hostess. She felt her face get even hotter.
Dale asked, "Beth Greene? Are you Hershel Greene's younger daughter?"
Oh wonderful, things just got even better. "Why yes I am."
That's when Daryl jumped in to try and rescue her, "Yeah her Dad told me he knows ya, he was askin' if you was still livin' out this way. C'mon now n have a seat. What did ya decide on for sumthin' ta drink?"
Beth was sure Erma Horvath hadn't taken her eyes off of her, even though Timmy was paying attention to the woman and she was lovingly rubbing her hand through his curls. She was asking him all about Christmas and what Santa brought him, but for some reason Beth felt like she was being watched. Maybe she was just self-conscious.
Daryl was in the kitchen getting everyone a glass of sweet tea, and Beth was thinking this was all her fault. She should never have asked him why he didn't get visitors.
Mrs. Horvath smiled sweetly and asked, "So what is it you do Beth?"
Perfect. She tried to keep it simple and matter-of-fact, "Well I was working in real estate in Atlanta but city life wasn't really for me. I've just recently moved back here. I'm living with my folks for a while while I consider my future." She immediately regretted that last part. Even she wondered, if she was living with her folks then what was she doing at Daryl's house in her pajamas? Planning her future?
Out of the blue Timmy came over and held his arms out to her, "Bef," and she pulled him up in her lap. That made her smile. Having him there cuddling with her made everything so much less uncomfortable. And thank goodness Daryl was walking back in the room with the sweet tea.
The Horvaths stayed about a half hour visiting and catching Daryl up on how all the neighbors had fared with the recent rough weather. Beth had relaxed a little, they really were very nice people, but still she wished she had her jeans and t-shirt on. And she really wished her hair didn't look like she'd just rolled out of bed.
She was very surprised and definitely caught off guard when, just before their visitors left Erma Horvath took light hold of her arm, smiled and whispered, "You got you a real good man in Daryl. Hang on to that one."
Beth didn't know exactly how to respond to that, so she just answered, "Okay, thank you."
When their visitors had driven out of sight she looked at Daryl and said, "I wasn't sure if I was going to throw up or just faint."
He wrapped an arm around her shoulders and gave her a quick kiss, then he laughed softly and tried to make light of it, "One thing is we ain't gotta worry about tellin' folks you an me are together, that news is about ta become the talk a the mountain." Then he got concerned, "Ya ain't embarrassed ta have folks know we got sumthin' goin' on between us, are ya?"
She was glad Timmy was in his room coloring while they were having this conversation. "You know better, it's not that at all Daryl. I'm proud to be with you but for gosh sake I'm in my pajamas, you're in your pajamas you have to know what they're thinking. It's just not the best way to meet the neighbors, especially acquaintances of my folks'."
"Well yeah, I'm pretty sure they do think we was up ta sumthin' more'n what really happened. But ya know if things go like I'm hopin' then someday soon what they're thinkin' is gonna be right. Beth you're a woman an I'm a man." He gave a slight shrug of his shoulders, smiled and kissed her quickly on the lips.
"Oh. Okay well um, I'm going to go get dressed before anyone else comes to the door."
He realized he'd embarrassed her and he pulled her closer, "It's gonna be okay. People are gonna think what they're gonna think. They coulda thought the same if ya was dressed. An what I said, ya know I ain't gonna press ya ta do sumthin' ya don't wanna do. But I know we both felt it last night, there was more we wanted with each other."
Now she wrapped her arms tightly around him, she'd felt her face turn a little pink and she buried it in his chest, "I did feel it Daryl and I do want all those things with you." She laughed nervously then, "I guess the cat's out of the bag whether we did or we didn't. There's nothing to be done about it now and besides you're right, we're adults it shouldn't matter." She looked at him with the still nervous smile, "Now no one's going to think you're a single Dad anymore."
"I don't feel like a single Dad anymore." The way he kissed her then, the passion and the promise the kiss held, if Timmy hadn't come running in the room it could have led to so much more.
They'd gotten dressed before finishing up with the Christmas tree, and when the last ornament had been laid in the cardboard box and Daryl had pulled off the string of lights, he and Timmy hauled the tree out to the burn pile.
She'd busied herself making the beds and straightening up the bathroom, and when she heard them come in the mudroom door she went to help Timmy with his coat and boots. What Daryl said then seemed to come out of the blue, but she knew him better than that. It must have been on his mind, "Bad news for me and maybe for you too, if ya see it that way, me an Timmy are back ta work in the mornin'. We laid off for a whole week an we got us a stack a stuff ta catch up on. Ain't that right Timmy?"
"Yes Daddy."
"Gosh I guess I hadn't thought about that." She asked herself what in the world it was she had been thinking about, apparently it hadn't been reality. Of course he had to get back to work.
He smiled as he roughed Timmy's hair but the timber of his voice told her he was nervous when he said, "Shadow an me don't mind if ya wanna come with us, but I bet ya got a whole lotta other things ya gotta do."
"I don't think I'd mind it at all I'd just worry you two would get sick of having me around. Anyway I'm sure I'll be helping Mama clean all day tomorrow. After the cooking we did, and the folks coming in yesterday and today there's going to be plenty to do. After tomorrow though, besides opening a hat shop and stuff, I'm just not sure what I'll be doing."
Although they smiled they both felt unsettled and unsure about what to do next. It seemed like they'd just gotten their start and now there were big changes coming to their small, cozy world.
ooo00ooo
She wanted to get to the farm a little early to help her Mama. Daryl thought they should take the Wagoneer, and she smiled to herself when he shrugged and said, "It's more of a family car." They were relieved when almost as soon as they got in the big Jeep Timmy nodded out. He hadn't gotten his usual amount of sleep the night before, and with the timing now he was going to be missing his regular nap.
Beth reached in the back smiling as she carefully removed his paper hat.
When they arrived at the farm the little boy was still sound asleep, even when his Daddy lifted him from the vehicle he didn't wake. "He must really be tired Daryl, there's a guest room downstairs and we can lay him in that bed."
"Ya don't think your Mama will mind?"
"I think you already know Mama better than that." She took the paper hat from the seat.
"Alright if ya think it's' okay, I'll come back out for the cooler." It was then he realized. "Shit girl, your car's still at my house."
"I know Daryl. I won't need it, and that would be a good excuse for you to come pick me up when you're done working tomorrow."
He looked at her, just slightly shaking his head, "I'ma have ta keep an eye on ya Beth, you're kinda sneaky," But he was smiling as he bent down and gave her a quick kiss.
Mama had heard them coming down the drive and was already holding the front door open, she saw the sleeping child and whispered, "Now isn't he just the most precious one." She lead the way to the guest bedroom and whispered, "Lay him right down on the bed Daryl." Daryl was wondering just how precious Beth's Mama would think the little guy was, if she'd seen what happened with the nice meal she fixed.
Beth and her Mother were in the kitchen when Daryl brought the cooler onto the back porch. Beth's Mama told him, "Hershel's out in the barn."
Daryl sensed that was her very nice way of saying, get your ass out of here, and he did.
Her Daddy was busily working on some old wood steps that led up to the hayloft, "Hey Mister Greene, Happy New Year. Is there sumthin' I can help ya with?"
The man stopped what he was doing and turned around, looking and sounding serious, "You can. You can tell me exactly what's going on between you and Beth. Is this love or are you just playing around with her?"
At first Daryl was caught off guard but then his mind went to the Horvaths' earlier visit. He was a simple man at the heart of him and a man who told the truth. Long gone was the man he used to be. He was also deeply offended by the question. His brow furrowed and his voice seemed rougher, but he didn't raise it to her Father as he answered, "I's honest with ya before about my feelins for Beth, but I'll tell it again. I get it, even though she's grown she's your baby girl an ya got your concerns for her. I got my concerns for her too. I also got concerns for my son. I don't take nuthin' lightly when it comes ta him. I wouldn't bring a woman in the home I share with my boy ta just play around with her. That ain't my way. Shit I ain't even had a woman since Timmy come ta be with me. And you more'n anyone know Beth ain't that kinda woman."
"When I stopped ta help her I sure as hell didn't think about her being some woman I could play with. All I's thinkin' was ta get her outta that car an outta there. I knew I had ta get all a us outta there. When I got her an Timmy home safe I figured she'd stay a couple days til it was safe ta come home ta y'all, I's pretty sure once she could leave I'd never see her again. I didn't expect ta get feelins for her. But I did. Ain't neither of us said its love but we've talked about how we feel, an I'd like ta think that's where it's goin'."
"Ya ask me a question twice an I gave ya an honest answer twice. Whatever ya think we done together, we ain't. But that don't mean I wouldn't if she was willin'. I'm a grown man, she's a grown woman. Now I told ya plain how I feel about her, an I ain't inclined ta have ta answer again."
Hershel Greene couldn't help but admire the simple man who spoke his mind and then moved on. Daddy extended his hand, "Thank you for saving my daughter's life. She's convinced you did and I agree. I'm sorry I've insulted you. You deserve respect and I do respect you Daryl. I've seen enough of you to know you're a good man. I guess I overreacted to things I heard from others and I know I spoke out of turn."
"Yeah it don't matter, it's done. So what can I help ya with out here?" He'd said his piece and he was done talking.
"I'm having a little trouble with an old John Deere. I can't start tearing it up today though, my wife won't be happy if I'm not being a gracious host when company comes by. But if you find some time in your work week to drop by, I'd appreciate the help."
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Beth had followed her Mother into the kitchen offering to help however she could, but Mama had a little something else in mind first. She gave her daughter a serious look as she spoke, "So Miss maybe you recall a visit y'all got this morning from the Horvaths? They made the drive right here from Daryl's and told me and Daddy all about it. Surely you remember, how they stopped by Daryl's and the three of you were all in your pajamas like a sweet little happy family. I'm just wondering whose sleeping where."
Beth immediately felt herself turn red and she felt a little sick, but she spoke right up. "Mama I know you worry and I know you have my best interests at heart, but I do wish you'd remember I'm an adult now. I'm also not hiding anything from you. Daryl, Timmy and I had a very casual evening. We had dinner and then Timmy had an accident that made quite the mess. So he had his bath and then Daryl and I each took a shower. We were all in our pajamas. We made newspaper hats and watched an old movie. After that we put Timmy to bed."
"When he was asleep Daryl and I sat on the couch sipping wine and we talked about our feelings for each other. It was serious but in a good way, a happy way. Then we kissed and we laid down on the couch and we did get close. But we didn't do what you think or what the Horvaths think. We fell asleep right there and didn't wake up until Timmy came and patted his Daddy's arm this morning. Daryl got him up on the couch and he laid there between us, we all snuggled for a while. It was nice Mama."
"We got up and the three of us cooked breakfast together, peach pancakes. We were being kind of lazy and we hadn't gotten dressed yet. We started taking the Christmas tree down. There was a knock on the door and it was the Horvaths. I thought I'd die right then. That's all I can tell you Mama except that we care for each other a lot, and yes we were in our pajamas. I love you Mama and I respect your feelings, but please remember I am a woman not a teenager."
Suddenly a panicked little voice shrieked, "Daddy! Bef!"
Mama went running, "Oh no he sounds scared."
She followed behind her mother and watched as the woman scooped the child up in her arms. Mama guessed the little guy woke up and was disoriented, not knowing where he was. She was sitting on the edge of the bed hugging Timmy to her chest, "Now don't you be scared Timmy, you're right here with me and I'd never let anything bad happen to you. Daddy and Beth are here too, okay?"
"K man," the little voice trembled.
She smiled as she tenderly rubbed the small child's back and spoke in a low soothing voice, "You're such a good little boy with such nice manners. I'm so happy you came to visit me today. I'd been missing you. I was hoping you'd come over and keep me company, maybe you could help me a little in the kitchen. Would you want to do that?"
"Yes Man."
"Oh that's wonderful. I'm so glad because I heard you're a very good helper."
The little boy snuggled into her, comforted by her words and soothing voice, but still not quite ready to get moving.
Beth was floored when her Mama looked at her and calmly asked her question, "So daughter do you think you're ready to be a Mother?"
As stunned as she was by the question she answered honestly, "Yes Mama I'm sure I am, I love Timmy."
They hadn't known he was watching them. He'd come to check on his son and from the hall he'd heard her Mama talking to the little guy. It made him happy to hear the woman being so kind to his child. He'd kept quiet, not wanting to spoil the moment.
Beth must have finally sensed him, or maybe it was that she felt his eyes on her. She turned and saw him there, his shoulder leaning against the jamb and his eyes focused right on her. His expression told her so much, she knew he was both stunned and touched by what he'd heard.
Mama saw the look they exchanged, and she'd heard what her daughter had told her. She was sure the couple needed to talk. Still holding the little boy in her arms she rose, "I'm going to get Timmy a glass of juice," she seemed to know to take the paper hat from the nightstand with her. She left the room and left the couple alone.
He moved to let her Mama pass and whispered, "Thank ya Ma'am."
As soon as she was gone he went to Beth. At first they simply stood face to face staring in each-other's eyes. Neither sure what they were supposed to say or do next. It was Daryl who spoke first, "It's too soon ain't it? I mean for this kinda heavy talkin', is it too soon?"
She shrugged a little, "I don't know. It seems like it is too soon, but I can't seem to help what I'm feeling. But yes, it's probably too soon."
They were both so confused by these feelings, neither had ever experienced anything like this, and it was soon. But it was also real.
"Alright then if it's too soon we ain't gonna talk about it." He moved quickly taking her in his arms and kissing her full-on and deep. When they stopped to catch their breath he whispered, "Like I said, I ain't talkin' about it, I'm just thinkin' out loud that I wish you was stayin' with me all the time."
She took a deep breath trying to calm her pounding heart, "I'm not talking about it either. I'm just thinking out loud, but if I was saying it then it would be that I wish I was staying with you all the time."
Again they simply stood there with neither speaking, eyes gazing deeply into eyes. Once more it was Daryl who broke the spell when he pulled her close. He began kissing her hard leaving no doubt of his desire. The heat between them was getting intense, too intense for her parents' guest room with company on the way. They needed to stop now or they may not be able to. Finally in a voice trembling with the emotion and passion of the moment she said, "I'd better help Mama." And he replied, "Yeah an I should be helpin' your Daddy an watchin' my boy."
He stepped aside to let her pass through the door ahead of him. But before she did he took her hand and pulled her in for one more hug, "Whenever you're ready ta come on home Beth I'ma be waitin' there for ya. Timmy an me both are."
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Chapter 11: Chapter 11
Summary:
Chapter Text
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They stood in the hallway a moment longer. He worried she might have a tear in her eye as they kissed just one more time. She was going to help her Mama in the kitchen, while he'd see if her Daddy could use a hand.
"Daryl why don't you let Timmy help Mama for a while, they seem to be enjoying each other's company. I'll come for you if he needs you."
"Alright if you're sure, but if he gets cranky ya come K? I don't want him disrespectin' your Mama."
"Please quit worrying so much Daryl, he's a good boy and he'll be fine. Now go on before I weaken and don't let you leave me at all."
He groaned a little as he whispered, "Damn girl don't tempt me like that," and lightly brushed his hand along her cheek.
She walked in the kitchen to see that her Mama had Timmy sitting on the counter in his paper hat, while she was pulling pans of food out of the oven. "I'm sorry Mama I should have been here helping you."
"It's okay daughter, I'm sure you and Daryl had some things to talk about. Besides I didn't need you, I had a very capable helper." And she saw Mama and Timmy beam at each other.
"I'm glad Timmy was able to fill in for me. Daryl and I did need to talk Mama, and it's something I want to talk to you about, but not while tiny ears are listening."
"Alright I'll be anxious to hear." Mama already had a pretty good idea of what may be coming.
They were setting the pans on the wood-topped kitchen island as Timmy looked on. Beth explained to him exactly what they were doing and what everything was, as they uncovered each pan and set the food in warming pans and chafing dishes. Then she uncovered the cabbage. He let out a loud shriek and immediately began to cry as if he was in physical pain. Mama was shaken and moved quickly to put her arms around the little boy. "Timmy my goodness child, are you okay? What in the world happened?"
The little guy pointed a finger at the cabbage and cried as he said, "No Man, no!"
Beth was working so hard at swallowing her laughter it almost hurt. She went to the little boy herself running a hand through his curls as she assured him, "Timmy, Honey you don't have to eat the cabbage I promise. Some other people are going to eat it but you're not."
It was then that Daryl walked in the kitchen, he'd come to get sweet tea for her Daddy and himself. He hurried over to the women and the little boy, "What happened?" His voice was tense, worried as he lay a hand on the little guy's cheek wiping away tears with the pad of his thumb.
In her own concerned and nervous voice her Mama told him, "I don't know Daryl everything was fine, then Beth uncovered the pan of cabbage and he started to shriek and cry. He pointed toward it and yelled 'no!'."
As controlled as Daryl usually was and as reserved as he most often was, this time he lost it. He just couldn't help himself and when he started laughing Beth lost control of herself. Now Mama was completely baffled. Timmy was a little confused too as he looked from his Daddy to Beth. His crying had turned to sniffles and Daryl took him in his arms cuddling him close. "I'ma just take Shadow out ta help me an Mister Greene, Beth will tell ya the whole story."
"Daryl!" She pretended to punch his arm. He just smiled and left the room as Mama called after him, "Beth will bring your tea."
She turned to her daughter then, "Alright now Miss, what's this all about?"
Beth told her Mama how Daryl had picked the onions out of the New Year's Eve dinner they'd made, trying to slip the food by the little boy. She told her how much Timmy loved the pork and the hoppin' john, and then about the bite of cabbage followed by the big drink of milk. And then she told her about the vomiting that immediately followed the milk. And following that the cleanup, the bath, the showers and laundry. Mama started laughing herself, "It's no wonder you were all sitting around in your pajamas. Timmy sounds just like you Bethie. Now go take those boys some tea so we can get this work done." This wasn't Mama's first experience with a little person.
Their guests would be arriving in the next hour or so and the food would be served buffet style. For now the elder Greenes along with Beth, Daryl and Timmy sat to enjoy their New Year's Day meal as a family. Daddy said the prayer thanking God for the bounty before them and asking His blessing on all of them. He prayed for peace and he prayed for the health of the soil and fair weather for the crops. Then it was time to eat.
Mama uncovered the dishes of food including a bowl and plate she set in front of Timmy. The bowl held plain buttered noodles with small pieces of ham, and a buttered biscuit with jam was on the plate. When Hershel saw what it was he smiled at Annette, "Just like Beth, huh?" Mama smiled and nodded, "Exactly."
At that Daryl finally relaxed. These were good people, he knew it before but this had sealed the deal. "Thank ya Ma'am that's real nice a ya ta go ta extra trouble for Timmy."
Timmy may not have understood what was going on but that really didn't matter when he said, "Tank ya Man."
Guests came and went and Beth was certain they were all looking at her like they'd heard something about her and Daryl, and she was sure they probably had. She'd lived in a small town nearly her whole life, she knew news traveled fast. Anyway she really didn't mind at all that people knew. She felt very proud to be seen as Daryl's girlfriend, and she was also proud of the well-mannered little boy.
By 5:30 Annette was sure the last of the guests had come and gone. Daryl helped with the cleanup until six when Mama got firm, "You need to get home now Daryl, you and Timmy have an early day tomorrow and you both need your rest. Beth and I can take care of the rest of this tomorrow, we've got all day. And I want you to take some of these food gifts too, there's no way we can use all of this. Why don't you take the macaroni and cheese, Timmy will love that and take that pot roast too."
"That seems too much Ma'am, too generous. We ain't needy, we got food."
"I have no doubt you're a good provider Daryl, that isn't why I offered. Think about it, what am I going to do with it all? Hershel and I can only eat so much and Beth will probably be spending more time with you and Timmy than with us."
She'd caught him and Beth both by surprise with her remark and she knew it. She couldn't help herself, she laughed and said, "I may be old but that doesn't mean I don't know about love." Now they were really shocked, they had yet to speak that word.
Flustered and not sure what to say Daryl just looked at her as calmly as he could and nodded, "Yes Ma'am."
He loaded the car first then Beth walked him and Timmy to the vehicle. Mama didn't want to be nosey but she just couldn't help herself, she was peeking out through the kitchen curtain watching as Daryl opened the door of the big Jeep. He had the little boy on his hip and was holding him tight with one arm, when he wrapped his other arm around Beth's shoulders. Immediately his head dipped down nuzzling into the curve of her neck and hair. As Mama watched with a smile she remarked out loud, "Now that's a man in love."
She didn't know her husband was standing right behind her, "Annette shame on you! It's not polite to snoop. Now pull that curtain a little further aside so I can see." They smiled at first but when the embrace ended and the little boy held his arms out to Beth crying hard, well it broke Mama's heart and definitely put a crack in Daddy's.
They watched as Beth took the child from Daryl and held him tight rocking him in her arms, then Daryl reached for him and put him in the car seat and the child was still crying. He took Beth in his arms, kissed her quickly and started to get in the vehicle but paused and looked back at her. It was obvious to the window peekers he was reluctant to leave her.
It was true that he didn't want to leave her and she didn't want him to go, but they both knew he needed to get the little boy home. He gave her one more quick kiss and hurried to get in the rig and leave before he felt compelled to stop and kiss her again.
Daddy looked to Mama, "Our daughter's going to be leaving home Annette."
"I know and I'll be sad to see her go, but at least they'll be living nice and close to us. And Hershel, we get a sweet little grandson to spoil." Mama was all smiles at the thought.
When Beth walked in the front door the tears were falling and that was all it took for Mama. She hugged her close, "I know it's hard Bethie. Both those boys love you and I know you love them."
"Are you sure it's love Mama?" That's when Daddy said, "pfftt well if it isn't then I'd like to know what the hell it is."
Mama gave her husband a stern look, "Hershel Greene you watch your language now, but daughter I think your Daddy's right. The big question is just what are you and Daryl going to do about that?"
"Like I said, he'll be by to pick me up after work tomorrow and we're going to talk about things, then I'm going to talk to you. Okay?"
"That sounds like a good idea. I think we've all worked hard enough today, we can save the rest of this for tomorrow. Let's you and I go upstairs and chat while Daddy watches his program." Hershel didn't mind a bit, he knew his wife would fill him in on anything important.
Annette and her daughter sat next to each other on the edge of Beth's bed, "So Daughter talk to your Mother."
"It's hard to put it in words Mama, everything about it seems so strange and yet so normal. I mean how we met isn't strange really but the weather definitely wasn't normal. To think we'd be snowed in that way and that there was no chance I could possibly make it home, at least not at first. But everything at Daryl's was so routine Mama, just really normal every day stuff. We cooked, we cleaned up, we took care of Timmy and played with him. We were all living so close and stuff it was almost like we were suddenly a family."
"Until Daryl's accident there wasn't one thing that was out of the ordinary. Except I felt this deep attraction for him that just seemed to happen so quickly, and I knew he was feeling it for me too. I'm not just talking about some physical attraction either Mama. I honestly liked and admired Daryl so much right from the start. I have a lot respect for the fact he's a man who knows exactly how he wants to live his life, he knows the person he is and he's content in that. And he's such a good Daddy to Timmy. And Mama, that little guy, how could anyone not love him? He's such a precious person."
Mama was smiling at the things her daughter told her but she did have a question, "What about Timmy's Mother? Daryl told Daddy the poor woman had passed, Daddy didn't want to ask the circumstances. Is Timmy close with her family?"
Beth told her Mama what she felt she could without betraying Daryl's trust, "Timmy's Mother was killed in a motorcycle accident. Daryl said she had no family and that she grew up in foster care. I'm sorry Mama but Daryl told me the whole story in confidence and I have to honor that trust. He also said if things got serious with him and me and we were thinking about taking it further, he'd tell you and Daddy everything. I think that's how it should be. The story should come from him."
"I think so too and I promise Daddy and I will be open-minded, we know life doesn't always follow a script. And just so you understand our position and you feel comfortable talking to us, Daddy and I know something else. We know love doesn't have a timetable, it doesn't use a calendar. When love comes it comes. You and Daryl seem to have that feeling between you already."
"I think so too and I think Daryl thinks so. It just seems like there's so much emotion, so many feelings so fast and all at once."
Her Mother hugged her and Beth whispered, "Thank you Mama. It'll be good for me and Daryl to talk tomorrow."
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Timmy did calm down after a few minutes and it was a huge relief to his Daddy. He hated seeing the little boy so sad, especially when he was every bit as unhappy himself. He felt it so strongly, this wasn't right at all, this was all wrong. Maybe she'd only been with them a few days but that didn't matter. What mattered was she belonged there. He knew it, she knew it and he was sure Timmy knew it.
He hated the idea of more tears, he just didn't think he could deal with it tonight and he didn't think Timmy could either. So with a half-guilty conscience he decided to forego the little boy's bath time. Instead they watched Frosty again, Daryl didn't mind because he wasn't watching anyway. He was too busy thinking about her.
He'd accepted the truth of his feelings and once he did, he wasn't sure why he'd been trying so hard to fight those emotions. Why didn't he just admit them to himself and to her? He'd told her he wanted her to come home, but he hadn't told her why. He hadn't expressed the depth of his feelings. It shouldn't matter whether it had been seven days or seven years, he cared for Beth. He felt pretty sure she was feeling the same kinds of things for him as he did for her. Yes he was sure. The time had come to talk about some kind of next step, and to let her know about the feelings he had.
He got Timmy tucked in and then got their things together for the next day, lunches made, snacks for Timmy, water for them both and juice boxes for his son. He went on line and checked for messages, found he had three new job requests waiting, and finally decided to try and get some sleep. It didn't come easy but it came.
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Talking to Mama had helped ease her mind and it also brought a lot of clarity, as well as the good feeling that came from knowing her parents were supportive. Mama's reassurances that it wasn't crazy, it was a little unusual and fast yes, but not crazy or impossible that they'd fallen so quickly and so hard. It was comforting and gave Beth both the confidence and the push she needed.
Daryl wanted her to come home and that's what she wanted too.
She also gave a great deal of thought to Timmy. Mama had asked her if she was ready to be a mother. It was something she'd asked herself several times a day since she'd first rubbed those tiny feet on Christmas Eve morning. She felt sure she was ready to take it all on, all the sweetness and happiness that seemed to just be in the child's nature, and the things that were definitely far less pleasant like the tears, the bedwetting and even the vomit. She felt she had a good grasp of the big picture. There would be some rough times but the good things more than made up for all of that.
And the biggest reason she felt ready was because she knew she loved Timmy. She had no trouble at all understanding how Daryl had completely and unconditionally accepted his role as the child's Daddy. And the truth of it was she'd seen it in her own family. Mama had always treated Maggie as her own, just like Daddy had always treated Shawn as his own. There was never any question they loved all of their children equally.
She felt it deeply, a longing for Daryl and Timmy to be her family. She was so sure now that it was how it was supposed to be, the three of them together. She couldn't wait to talk to Daryl, to tell him how she felt and to tell him she wanted him to take her home.
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When Mama made a peach pie for Timmy first thing in the morning, Beth knew for sure the little guy had stolen her heart too. It meant so much to know her own Mother had accepted the child and obviously had deep affection for him.
The two women worked hard all day getting the holiday decorations put away and the house back in order. Despite the work it was fun for just the two of them to have this time of being together in a casual and comfortable way.
Daryl texted her late morning, "Hey, can we just eat at home tonight? Just the three of us?" She didn't hesitate to respond "Yes xo," or to smile at his use of "home" rather than saying his house.
She explained to her parents at lunch that she and Daryl had talking to do and he and Timmy wouldn't be staying for dinner. After lunch Daddy took her hand and smiled, "We understand Bethie but I want Daryl to understand too. I want him to come to me and your Mama and tell us about himself and about Timmy. We don't want to judge him, but if you're serious about him then as your parents we feel we need to know him better."
"I'll let him know Daddy, he told me before he'd tell you everything."
He and Timmy were there by five all smiles and happy to see her, and she was smiling herself as she walked to the truck. The three hugged for a long moment and he whispered, "Missed ya Beth, real bad." And she whispered, "I missed you more." And Timmy was just saying, "Bef, Bef."
"I need to tell Mama and Daddy goodbye and get my bag."
"Yeah Shadow an me need ta tell 'em 'hey,' an I'll carry your case."
Daryl smiled when Mama handed him the pie and said, "This is for Timmy but I'm sure if you ask he'll share."
"Thank ya Ma'am that was real nice. I hope he does share." He turned to his son, "Look here Shadow Miz Greene made ya a peach pie. Whaddya say?"
"Tanks Man." The little boy smiled up at her and she couldn't resist leaning down for a hug and a kiss on the cheek.
Mama and Daddy held hands as they watched Daryl's truck head back down the drive, and they wondered aloud if their daughter would ever spend another night in their home without Daryl. In this moment they were sure the answer was no.
She insisted on getting the dinner ready, warming the pot roast and fixings Mama had sent him home with, "You go ahead and get your work stuff organized for tomorrow and have your shower. Timmy and I are going to take care of dinner, aren't we Timmy?"
"Yes Bef hungwy pwease."
"I'm sure you are. I know you've been working hard all day and that makes a man hungry." Daryl walked away with a smile. He wondered how he'd gotten so lucky but he'd made up his mind he wasn't going to overthink it, and he wasn't going to question it. He was going to accept and enjoy his good fortune.
After dinner and cleanup they sat with Timmy on the sofa watching a nature program about tropical fish. The little boy was fascinated by the colorful fish and the music that played in the background, but the adults weren't really paying attention. They had their arms wrapped around behind him as the three sat close, and they kept glancing at each other, smiling in an almost shy way. They both knew there was a big talk coming after Timmy went down for the night and each was feeling a little anxious.
It wasn't so much they didn't know what to expect, it was more that they knew exactly what to expect and in its way, and as much as it was what each of them wanted, it was daunting. Commitment was a big word with an even bigger meaning. He'd never made a commitment to a woman and she'd never made one to a man.
Then it seemed to happen for them at the same time. They each took a deep breath followed by a look at the little boy, and then a long look at each other. It was like any doubt or anxiety they may have been experiencing lifted in that moment. This was it, right here. It was what they wanted and exactly what they were happy and anxious to commit to, the two of them and the little boy being together was everything.
Timmy was happily splashing in the tub as she knelt beside it folding the magic washcloth. Daryl was kneeling next to her watching them both and smiling. "Everythin's so much better, like it all just smooths right out when you're here with us Beth. I'm happier an Shadow's happier, ya make our life better."
As if on cue the little boy turned his head to look at her, "Bef yuv." She could feel the emotion welling up inside her as she ran her hand over his curls, "I love you Timmy, so much." And the look she gave to Daryl seemed to convey she may have those same feelings for him.
They put the little boy to bed together, all of them sharing hugs, kisses, wishes for happy dreams and most of all love. As they walked from the child's room he took her hand and simply asked, "Ready?"
"Yes."
They sat cross legged on his bed, they were looking at one another in a serious way as he talked of days gone by. Occasionally one would reach out to lightly touch the other's hand, or arm or leg, while Daryl told her the story of the life he'd had. He didn't hold back or try to pretty up what was often a very ugly reality. It was nothing to brag about but also nothing to feel ashamed of, it was simply the story of what had been.
It had been a hostile household where hateful beatings were often the order of the day and fun, laughter and love were non-existent. He told her there had been some love at one time when he was very small, before his Mom completely gave herself up to the bottle, but he recalled very little of it.
What he did remember was being eight years old and out with the neighborhood children riding a bike Merle had stolen for him. He saw the smoke and heard the sirens, both coming from the direction of their house. By the time he got there it was mostly done and gone, and not just the house. His Mom was gone for good too. The fireman said it was an accident, they said she'd fallen asleep with a cigarette in her hand. In that moment Daryl admitted to Beth something he'd never shared with anyone, he'd often wondered if it had really been an accident. Life was so bad at their house he wouldn't have faulted his Mom if she did it on purpose.
He shared with her what was the brutality of his growing up years after his mother was gone, the hunger and more beatings and what it was like to live with constant fear, anger and hate. She fought her tears not wanting him to mistake them for pity, or to stop his story thinking she couldn't take it. It was hard to hear but she knew it was a part of him and she had to accept it, she had to know about the life he'd lead to fully know him. He often spoke of the man he used to be before he became the man he was now. She wanted to know everything about both those men.
He went into greater detail than he had before about how he and Merle had lived and the things they'd done. "Ya had it right when ya asked did I miss him. I do, I miss that redneck asshole every day a my life. But when Merle died it was like that part of my life died with him. He was the last of any family I had, I was the last man standing. I knew I could never give up, never falter and never fail cuz I had that little man in that bed in there. I needed ta care for him an I needed ta do it right. Caring for him was what helped heal me up. Sometimes I just look up at the sky an I think, 'Thanks brother, thanks for trustin' me ta care for the best thing ya ever done in this life.'"
So powerful to her were these words he had spoken and the things that he'd told her. As she looked in his eyes she spoke her own truth, "I love you Daryl Dixon."
The tears came to his eyes then, and as he reached for her he said it clearly and with both deep affection and deep conviction, "I love you Beth Greene."
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Chapter 12: Chapter 12
Summary:
Chapter Text
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All they could do for several minutes was just hold onto each other. His face was pressed in the curve of her neck, buried in those blond curls and he was holding her so tightly that for a moment he worried he might hurt her. But the soft sounds coming from her told him she was okay. He knew she was holding him just as tight as those arms of hers were able, and his happiness came in the knowing that she wanted to be as close to him as he wanted to be to her. He felt it so strongly, the need to continue taking in the feel of her and the smell of her, and he wanted to let those words she'd said to him keep replaying over and over in his mind.
He was overwhelmed by his own feelings causing him to be emotional. He'd never experienced anything like this. When he'd felt those tears come he knew they weren't caused by sadness, they were caused by the profoundness of this love he was feeling. He'd found this huge part of himself and his life that he hadn't even known was missing. He knew he would never be the same.
She hadn't planned for it to happen quite the way it did, but now she was so glad she'd spoken those words to him. She'd been hoping he would say them to her first. Isn't that how it's supposed to be? The man tells the woman he loves her and then she tells him? Maybe that was the usual way relationships developed, but then nothing about her relationship with Daryl was "the usual" or ordinary, or anything like she'd always thought these things were supposed to be. Why should this moment have been any different? This was their love story, hers and Daryl's. She was so happy she'd told him when she did. When he'd bared his soul to her she realized that it was a huge sign of his love for her, that this man would so completely open up to her about so many things. She knew he was a private person and yet he'd taken a huge leap of faith with her, he told it all. It was the consummate display of love and trust.
Thinking of these things she became so overcome with feelings she had to tell him once again, "I love you Daryl." She felt him pull her even tighter into him, she hadn't thought it was possible they could be any closer, but they were. She'd never been held so tightly. Yet it didn't hurt, in fact she'd never known anything could feel as good as his strong arms wrapped around her. It was perfect, it was powerful and it was pure, it was loving and it felt so safe. She hoped he'd never let her go.
"I wanna say things to ya about how I feel, but I ain't no poet. I don't know how ta put my feelins' into words. Right now I'm just tryin' hard ta think how it was that I ever managed without ya. I love ya girl, you're always gonna be the only one I love."
"That's poetry to me Daryl."
He kissed her then and although there was passion in his kiss it was so tender.
"I don't wanna be selfish Beth but I guess it's what I am. I don't want ya leavin' us no more. I know ya love your Mama n Daddy an I know they love ya too. I get they want ya there. But I want ya here, Timmy wants ya here. I want us ta be family."
She felt the tears come to her eyes, family, yes that was what they'd become in the short time she'd been with Daryl and Timmy, her family. In a quiet emotion-filled voice she told him, "It's what I want too Daryl and I don't think Mama and Daddy are going to be completely shocked. What I don't know is what I'll do, I mean I feel like it isn't right for me to just move in here and start living off of you. I don't have any money, I don't have a job, I don't have a prospect of a job."
He didn't want to be angry, anger was the last thing he wanted this to be about, but her words had triggered something in him, "Is that what ya think this is about, that we're gonna worry about who's got what and who makes cash money an who don't? Ya think I'd want ya here for a paycheck? Shit Beth my mind didn't even go there. I's thinkin' it was about love an bein' together like the family we already are. Don't ya see it? Just bein' here with me an Shadow, ya don't even know how much ya do, how much ya help an how much better ya make our lives. I couldn't pay no one ta do what ya do. An I damn sure couldn't pay someone ta be what ya are ta us."
His words were so loving and so powerful and she had no doubt how honest they were. She felt bad for having said what she said. "Please don't be angry I guess I just feel a little guilty is all."
"I ain't angry at ya Beth, I think it hurt is all. Ya want a job? I'll give ya one, but do we gotta talk about it now?"
She kissed him, "No. Not now. But Daryl you're going to have to talk to Daddy and Mama, they have questions."
"I will. I got no problem with that, if that's what I gotta do ta have ya here I'm happy to. But ya ain't told me how ya want it ta be. Do ya still have doubts or do ya want this home with us, this life with me an Timmy?"
"Yes I want this with you and Timmy, more than I've ever wanted anything."
He'd laid her down and he lay above her, leaning on his elbows and with his hands resting lightly to either side of her face, his fingers weaving through her hair. Her hands were on his face as her thumbs lightly stroked his cheeks. He looked into her eyes with an odd mix of love and solemnity, "It's real ain't it? The things we said, this thing we got, it's real?"
It was more of a statement laced with incredulity than a question, yet she answered him, "Yes Daryl it's real, it's very real."
It was as if he froze for a moment, then his mouth was on hers with a need so powerful she might have felt overwhelmed if her own need hadn't been as great as his. They were no longer making an effort to repress their desire. Their kisses soon became so impassioned, so intense that his light stroking of her hair had turned into his hands clasping at the blond curls, just short of pulling; while her light thumb strokes on his cheeks had turned into her fingers lacing in his hair as if in an effort to pull him even closer into her.
He tried to gain some control, he didn't want this to just be about some kind of hot and fast sex. That wasn't how it was going to be with her. She was the first and only woman he'd ever loved and he planned to treat her that way, in and out of bed. He took in a deep breath as his mouth moved to the lobe of her ear where he gently sucked and bit at the soft flesh. Soon his lips made their way to the curve of her neck, her shoulders, collarbones and the delicate skin of her throat. His need was palpable, as though he'd been dying of thirst and had just found cool water. The soft humming noise and throaty murmuring sounds coming from her gave him confidence she was feeling a need and a pleasure equal to his own.
It occurred to him then, he hadn't even asked. He lifted his head and fixed his eyes on hers, in a hoarse voice he questioned, "Is this okay Beth?"
She understood exactly what he wanted to know, "Yes, I want everything with you." Her affirmation was all it took and he was off the bed before she knew what had happened. He hurriedly locked the bedroom door then went to his dresser where he took something out, he held it in his hand before setting it on the night table. It was then she saw it was a packet of condoms. She wondered if all men kept those handy, but she didn't wonder for long as his lips moved back onto hers and her mind was only on him.
He knelt above her now looking down with that little half grin. The almost shy look he often had was replaced by the confident look of a man who knows exactly what he wants. His hands gently slipped up and under her tee shirt and he quickly had it off, before reaching a hand behind her as he nimbly popped the hooks of her bra. He paused as he once again asked, "Still alright?" The longing in her eyes told him what he needed to know even before she softly whispered "Yes." With that he slipped the garment off her before hastily removing his own shirt. His mouth moved to her breasts and her already taut nipples, his licking and sucking, the little nibbles, and light pinching all served to intensify the need they were already feeling so powerfully.
As he continued his attentions to her breasts and the delicate skin of her throat and neck, her hands were in his hair and her mouth licked, nibbled and kissed at the skin of his shoulders, collarbones and chest. When her hands slid down to the scarred skin of his back she felt him flinch, but after a moment he relaxed. She felt it again, he was letting go for her, he was making all that was a part of him available and open to her. She tried to impart the deep love that was in her heart into her soft touch. The sounds that came from him had become low and like a guttural and demanding purr. It was making her want him even more.
His mouth moved down the length of her abdomen and his kisses there were more open mouthed as his lips lightly sucked at the warm skin. She knew her body had given in to him completely when she seemed to have lost all control over the movement of her hips and the arching of her back.
His hand slipped to the button on her jeans and he quickly had it loosened as he began sliding her zipper down. Again he briefly stopped himself asking in a rough and desire-filled whisper, "Ya sure?"
"Very," and with her assurances he had her jeans off of her and on the floor along with his own. His mouth wandered between her breasts, while his hands were on them. She felt like every one of her nerve endings was vibrating as he kissed and licked at her skin, slowly moving that mouth down her abdomen again until he reached her panties. He deftly slipped them down and off and his tongue and lips began to tease her most sensitive area. Her hips began to raise more as her desire intensified, and he slid his hands just above her hips pulling her closer to him. He stopped just long enough to whisper, "I got ya Beth, lemme make ya feel that." The heightened pace of her breathing, the more fervent rising and falling of her hips as she responded to his attentions, and the amplified sounds of her moaning let him know he was bringing her pleasure. When she came he felt himself smile knowing he could take her to that place.
Now his mouth worked its way slowly back up her body, back up her abdomen to her breasts and then her throat. He took his time, giving her a chance to catch her breath and to make her ready for him. When he got to her lips he kissed her deeply and he knew he wanted her more than ever. His voice had grown ever rougher as he whispered, "I love ya."
She replied, still just a bit breathless, "I love you." With that his hand slipped between her legs as he once again found that sweet spot and she responded to his touch.
He knelt between her thighs as he slipped the condom on, then leaned down and kissed her hungrily before entering her. His movements were slow at first, wanting to prolong the feeling for both of them, and it thrilled him that her rhythm almost immediately came into sync with his. As he moved in her he continued his attentions to her breasts and the skin of her shoulders and throat, stopping only to kiss her long and hard.
When he felt she was getting close he reached his hands under her bottom, raising her low body even closer into his as his thrusts became harder and more rapid. When he felt her began to let go he let himself go and they came together.
They clung to one another as they tried hard to catch their breath. He felt her shiver and pulled the cover up over them as he pulled her closer. "Can we just lay like this a while?" Her only response was to burrow even closer into him.
He woke at two a.m. and tried to be as quiet as possible as he slipped out of the bed, covering her with the big quilt. As quietly and as carefully as he could he folded her clothes and set them neatly on the chair, and then did the same with his own. Before he left the room he softly kissed her cheek, and then made his way to the bathroom. He put on his sleep pants and went to Timmy's room, crawling in bed with the little guy. As much as he loved holding Shadow close to him as he slept, he hadn't wanted to leave what was now his and Beth's bed. But she'd been right before, it wouldn't be good for Timmy to just walk in and find them there.
Even though the boy was really too little to understand it, it was still something that was different, a change in his life and routine. Just like Daryl explained everything else to the child, he would explain to him that Beth was now a part of their family, that she'd be living in their home with them. That she'd be sharing the bed with him because that's what Daddies and Mommies do. And his own thought brought him face to face with a new reality and a huge question. Would Beth now be Timmy's Mommy? Would that be a role she'd care to take on? He realized there was still so much for them to talk about.
For now though he was dog tired and sleep was quickly upon him. He didn't wake again until he felt the little hand patting his shoulder. "Daddy." He was smiling before his eyes even opened. He wrapped the child in his arms as he kissed his sweet little head and whispered to him, "How's my boy today? How's my Shadow? Did ya have ya a good rest? Did ya have some a them happy dreams? You're Daddy's boy an I love ya so much son." It was as he spoke he noticed the smell of the coffee and he smiled but he wondered why she was up before them, she should have rested.
Suddenly the little boy was ready to go, and he patted his Daddy again, "Hungwee Pwease." Daryl smiled, "Alright then get them slippers on."
He saw she had the fire going strong, and as they walked in the kitchen she turned from the stove with a smile, "Well good morning you two." Timmy was over to her just that fast, wrapping his little arms around her leg, "Bef."
Daryl went to her leaning down and kissing her cheek, "G'mornin', I's hopin' maybe you'd sleep in, get ya some rest."
She bit her lip to bite back a laugh as her cheeks pinked up, "I had a very good night's sleep thanks to you." She'd embarrassed him for sure but also made him smile and wish they could go right back in that room.
But there were responsibilities and number one of those was still hanging onto her leg, ""Hungwee Bef. Pwease."
"Now Shadow if we're gonna eat we need ta help, right?"
"Yes Daddy."
"Beth what can me an my helper do?"
"You could cut the biscuits and get them in the oven, please."
They were keeping it a little low key, not wanting to say anything to Timmy quite yet. They'd agreed it was the right step to talk to her parents first, then they'd do their best to explain things to the little boy.
His last service call of the day was supposed to be at Tyrese and Karen's house, giving the furnace a cleaning and changing the filters. He was going to call them and see if he could reschedule for first thing the next morning. That way he and Timmy could get to the farm early. He was hoping to have a chance to talk to her folks before supper.
Now that this was really happening he was anxious to talk to them. He wouldn't go into the kind of detail he had with Beth, but he would tell them a little about the man he used to be, and how Timmy came to be with him. Now that he felt so sure they were good people, he hoped they'd be understanding and accept these things. He wanted them to feel good about him and Beth being in love and wanting to be together. It surprised him when he realized their "blessing" was so important to him. After all, these were Beth's people and she loved them and wanted to be close with them. He couldn't be truly happy if he somehow got in the way of that.
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She was driving to the farm thinking of all she had to do to prepare for this move. There was the packing for one. Daryl lived so simply it seemed almost impossible that someone lived that way in this day and age. Yet nothing about his life felt austere, it was really quite peaceful. She decided he was on to something and she'd already grown to prefer the lifestyle herself. It seemed so much easier not to have all the "stuff," so many unnecessary things cluttering up your home and your life. Things no one really needs. Instead he had just the things he needed, along with what he considered his one big luxury, a TV. The thought made her smile. What really made her smile was she knew it wasn't some kind of well thought out "lifestyle choice" Daryl had made. It was just Daryl, it was who he was. And who he was to her was the man she loved.
Nevertheless, on that drive she suddenly questioned this. What the hell were they thinking? They barely knew each other. How could this possibly work out? It was insane, they needed to rethink things, wait awhile. Ah, but then she thought about him and about the man he was, he was good and he had his code. He was honorable, honest, responsible and devoted and she was so lucky because it was her that he loved and it was him that she loved.
That's what she knew and all she needed to know. What better foundation could they have than love?
She was a little nervous about telling her folks even though, just like she'd told Daryl, she knew they wouldn't be shocked. She was sure they were expecting something like this. But now it was going to happen and she knew they were likely to have issues with her "living" with a man. They'd undoubtedly prefer she got married before anything like that happened. She was grateful Daryl was going to be there early to talk to them.
When she pulled in the driveway she saw Daddy and Mama on the porch taking a little break, having a glass of sweet tea together. The time had come, she took a deep breath.
They were all smiles as she leaned close and kissed them each on the cheek, "Good morning you two."
Her Daddy smiled, "Daughter we missed you, sit with us."
Mama was already starting to get up, "I'll get you a glass of tea."
"No Mama you sit, for gosh sake I can get my own tea."
They all seemed to feel it, to know that something big was coming but still they started with the pleasantries of conversation. "Timmy loved the peach pie Mama, and Daryl was very happy he was willing to share. There's not much left."
Daddy chuckled softly, "Your Mama's pretty taken with the little fella, she didn't bake me any peach pie."
"Daddy you get more homemade pie than any other man on this planet."
It was time and she took another deep breath, "Mama, Daddy, Daryl and I have made a big decision, he's coming over this afternoon to talk to you about it more. Anyway, we talked a lot and he wants me to stay there with him and Timmy, and that's what I want too."
Daddy just nodded at first, while Mama's eyes filled with tears. Not because she felt sad so much as because this was the last big step, her baby girl, her youngest child was no longer "little" she was a woman about to officially embark on a life of her own.
The other thing at play was that Hershel and Annette Greene were very conservative people. They didn't really condone the idea of couples living together without the benefit of marriage. She knew that and she respected their beliefs, but she was also ready for this step and she knew Daryl was too.
Daddy finally took his own deep breath and simply said, "I'll be anxious to talk with Daryl this afternoon." Beth didn't push it any further or ask him any questions. The conversation had gone smoothly and she wasn't going to take a chance of starting any trouble.
All she said was, "You know I love you both so much. I know how lucky I've been to have you as my parents. I promise you I'm not entering into this lightly. I love Daryl, I love Timmy and I know they love me."
When she went to her room she looked around and it made her smile, she still had things from Middle School on her bulletin board, and when she looked in her closet she saw clothes she hadn't worn in years. It was definitely time to sort through all of that stuff and that was how she spent her day. Weeding out what she no longer needed, wanted or wore. Keeping only the things she really used and the few keepsakes that actually held meaning for her. She ended up with just two boxes, including one or two of her kitchen items. She smiled when she packed her pie plate and baking sheets.
She showered and dressed and packed up her toiletry items. She'd just gotten everything together in one corner of her room when her phone beeped, it was a text from Daryl. "Leaving now be there in twenty." Perfect timing.
She practically skipped down the stairs, "Mama I just heard from Daryl and he's on his way."
"Oh, alright you'd better go tell your Daddy."
When he pulled in the drive she went right to the truck, "Hey you, I missed you two boys today."
"Not as bad as we missed you." He hugged her close and then got Timmy from the truck and she held the little boy in her arms, smiling as Daryl wrapped his arms around them both. If she'd had even one bit of lingering doubt it ended with that small gesture. This was right, this was good.
Mama and Daddy waited on the porch and as hard as her leaving was for them, even they couldn't help feeling this was right. There was something so good about it and they had that strong sense that it was always meant to happen. Their beliefs ran deep and they thought of it as God's plan for their daughter, for Daryl and for that sweet and innocent child.
Beth set the little boy down and he went running straight to her Mama, he smiled happily as he wrapped his arms around her leg and said, "Man." She picked him up and said, "How's my Timmy today? I missed you." He laid his head on her shoulder and just snuggled in. Mama's heart was happy, yes this was right.
Beth knew Daryl was anxious to just do this thing, to talk to them and resolve whatever might need resolving. He wanted them to start their new life together and he hoped they'd do that with the Greene's blessing.
After he'd shaken her Daddy's hand and nodded, "Hello Ma'am," to her Mama Beth sweetly interjected, "While you all visit, Timmy and I are going in the kitchen to have a glass of juice and finish getting supper ready." She could honestly say she was more than happy to not be part of the discussion, she was grateful Daryl was going to handle this.
They went in Hershel's study and Daryl told them a little about his life, not all the details as he had with Beth, but he did let them know he came from a troubled and abusive home, that he'd had very little supervision when he was young and that he and Merle had taken a bad path. He told them about realizing it wasn't the life he wanted. He touched on the sadness that came from knowing his brother couldn't leave that lifestyle behind. Then he told them about his brother's final visit and how he was left with Timmy.
Mama was softly crying but she spoke the truth as she saw it. "Your brother Merle may have had his troubles, but he must have been a very good man to acknowledge he was in no condition to care for a small baby. He knew who was though, didn't he Daryl? To think your brother trusted you with something so special just proves how much he loved and respected you."
Her words nearly caused him to cry but he swallowed hard and said simply, "Thank ya Ma'am Timmy and Beth are the two best things ta ever come ta me."
He told them how much he loved Beth and how much he wanted them to be family. He promised her folks he'd care for her and treat her just as special as they would. "I ain't ever gonna hurt Beth in any way, ya got my word on that." They already knew Daryl Dixon well enough to know he was a good man.
Daddy spoke then, "I appreciate everything you've told us Daryl. I appreciate your honesty about your past, and about Timmy. I have no doubt you'll be good to Beth and I know she loves you. But my wife and I are traditional people and that causes me to wonder, and to ask you if you plan to marry our daughter?"
That caught him completely off guard. It wasn't that he wouldn't or he couldn't, it was just something he'd never thought of. He'd never imagined himself as a married man, a family man. He supposed he should have thought of that with Beth. He was ready to commit to her, he had committed to her. He'd told her she would always be the first and only woman he loved. "It ain't that I'm against it at all, I guess I just hadn't come ta think of it. Her an me, we'll talk about that. I promise ya."
Daddy could only smile at the man, "That sounds fair, you two talk about it."
Beth was relieved when Daryl and her Mama came in the kitchen together both of them smiling, but she tried to act casual like there were no big deals. Thankfully Daryl spoke first, "If ya got your stuff together I could load it in the truck." He couldn't keep the smile from his face and never had she wanted to kiss him more than right that minute.
"Okay, I'll show you."
As good as her Mama's cooking was she couldn't wait to get through dinner and cleanup, and she was certain Daryl felt the same. He feigned a yawn and said, "We better get on home now, Timmy an me got a big work day tomorrow." If he and Beth thought Mama and Daddy were even one bit fooled, they were wrong.
He knew Timmy would cry at the thought of leaving her so as he carried the boy to his truck he told him, "Ya ain't gotta cry now Shadow, Beth's comin' home with us. She's gonna be drivin' right in front a us in her car, k? She's comin' home ta stay son."
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Chapter 13: Chapter 13
Summary:
Chapter Text
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It was as though you could feel it in the air, the closeness and love that only comes when hearts are open and ready to receive it. They were home. They weren't at his home and they weren't at her parent's home, this was their home.
It wasn't just Daryl and Beth who were ready to receive this love, there was a small boy whose heart had been open to it from the start. Together they would try to explain to that little boy how a family was exactly what they'd become.
"Guess what Shadow, no bath for you tonight. Daddy an Beth are gonna talk with ya a little, K? Then we can watch a cartoon before bed."
"K Daddy." Although the little boy no longer hated bath time, like he did before Beth and her magic washcloths came into his life, he was still far happier with the idea of watching a cartoon.
Daryl knew it was right that he be the one to initiate this conversation with the child, not Beth. Timmy was his son and his responsibility. There was a major change coming to the child's life, a change that both Daryl and Beth felt sure was a permanent change. It was Daryl's place to be the one to talk to his son about this new life they'd all be living together. He was happy to know Beth would be right there though, even if she never said a word he knew just her presence would would help him.
The little guy was seated on the couch and Beth was in the big chair. Daryl chose to kneel on the floor with his hands resting on Timmy's knees and face to face, eye to eye with his son. "Ya remember on Christmas Eve mornin' how we went ta Miz Heywood's, even though we didn't wanna get out in that cold?"
Timmy shook his little body like he was shivering all over but he smiled when he said, "Burrr." It still fascinated Beth how every time Daryl talked to the child, whether it was about making pancakes, stoking the fire, or shooting his bow the little boy got so serious and paid such close attention. They would look so intently into each others eyes and Timmy would be so focused. It seemed unusual for a child his age. Then she thought again about how for the little boy's entire life Daryl was his everything, his only "person."
"I'll say it was burr, we was about ta freeze our bottoms right off til the heater in the truck kicked in good. 'Member on our way home it was even worse? Man it was spittin' snow an the wind was blowin' hard. Then Daddy saw that car on the road."
"Bef." That made Daryl smile, it was like an odd kind of relief. Now he knew for sure Timmy was aware of the chain of events that had led to Beth being with them.
"Yeah she had a little accident an it wasn't safe out there, so me an you we brought her home with us, didn't we?"
"Daddy break tree."
Daryl laughed a little and rubbed a hand through the little boys' curls, "That's right, Daddy had ta hack up that tree ta get it outta our way so's we could get home, an so we could get Beth home with us."
"Do ya like havin' Beth here with us Shadow?" He was sure he knew the answer but Beth told him it was probably a good idea to let Timmy have a voice in all of this.
They were both rewarded when the little boy responded, "Bef yuv."
"Ya love Beth, huh? Well guess what? Daddy loves Beth too. Ya know what else? Beth loves you son an she loves Daddy. Ain't that nice, that we all love each other that way?"
"Yes Daddy."
"That's right Shadow, an when people love each other then they wanna be together, ain't that right? You an Beth an me, we all love each other an we wanna be together, don't ya think?"
"Yes Daddy."
"Well then what would ya think about if Beth was ta live here with you an me? She could stay with us all the time, every night an every day. Would ya think that was good?"
Timmy smiled and nodded his head several times, and even turned his face away from his Daddy's just long enough to glance over at her. "Stay."
She'd never thought about the possibility of Timmy not wanting her there, he'd been so sad when she left or didn't go home with them. But he said that one word and the emotion welled up in her. He wanted her to stay there with them. She had to get up and go to the little boy, wrapping her arms around him as she told him, "I always want to stay with you Timmy, I love you."
He nodded his head like he was already so sure of the love, "Bef Yuv."
Then came the time for Daddy to tell him the part he worried might get a little sticky. The part where he told Timmy Beth would be sleeping in his Daddy's bedroom. He didn't think Timmy would understand any sexual implications of that, in fact he was certain the little boy wouldn't. What he worried about was that Timmy would wonder why Beth got to stay in there when he didn't. Why was he the only one who had to sleep alone?
Daryl took a deep breath, "So yeah, so Shadow um Beth here is gonna be sleepin' in Daddy's room from now on. Ya still get ta keep your own room with all your stuff just for yourself. Beth she's gonna be stayin' in my bedroom."
"K Daddy. Toons?" And there it was, the extent of the child's concern. Were they ever going to just stop talking and put the cartoon on?
Beth was suppressing a laugh while Daryl was breathing a sigh of relief, "Yeah that's right cartoons."
Beth joined them on the sofa and Daryl got the cartoon on, an episode of the Backyardigans. When the episode began and the animals started to dance and sing, Beth jumped up off the couch smiled at the little boy and said, "C'mon Timmy, let's dance."
There the two of them were humming along with the music, Beth in key and Timmy out, and dancing to the upbeat songs that were being played. Timmy was smiling, waving his little arms and shaking his bottom side to side, while Beth had the moves down quite well. Daryl just watched them.
She always seemed to have some little surprise in store, some little part of her he hadn't yet seen. As simple as it was, this getting up to dance and sing was something that would have never even crossed Daryl's mind. But he liked it, his child was having fun and she was having fun and there wasn't anything about Beth and her happy nature that didn't appeal to him.
Just as he'd felt and said so many times, she made their lives better. With every new thing she did he seemed to fall more in love. He could see now that his and Timmy's lives really were going to change completely with her there. She and Daryl were such different people. Maybe that was part of what made it so good. They each brought something of their own to this relationship, something different. Not just the one they had with each other but also their relationship with Timmy.
He smiled as he continued watching them and thought back to the man he used to be. He wondered if at that time in his life he would have truly appreciated this woman and this child. Would he have had the love in his heart for them that he did now? He thought No, he hadn't been ready then. They each came to him at just the right moment in his life, the moment when his heart was open to receiving them.
"Daryl," Beth gently nudged his shoulder, "the cartoon is over. Where have you been?"
"I don't know I guess my mind was just wanderin' is all. You two dancers about ready ta get pajamas on?"
They tucked the little boy in and each took their turn holding him tightly and telling him how much they loved him and to have good dreams, happy dreams, and they kissed him goodnight.
Beth was feeling elated, everything had gone so well. She wasn't sure what she would have done if Timmy had been upset about her staying, or if he would have been unhappy or sad about her getting to be the one to share his Daddy's bed.
Daryl though, he still had a lot on his mind as he held her hand and they walked toward the living room. He stopped for a moment, "Ya know I think I'ma have a drink. Ya want one?"
She was surprised he'd decided to drink, it wasn't that she minded him having one it just wasn't expected when he had work in the morning, "No I think I'm fine thank you."
She sat in the big chair and he made his way back to the bedroom, returning with that bottle of Jack he kept stashed. "I'ma have ta make a liquor run here sometime soon." He grinned at her but it was a nervous looking smile and she was starting to suspect something was up. She felt the slightest of a knot start to form in her tummy.
He went to the kitchen and when he returned with the glass of ice and liquor he stood in front of her, "Why doncha get up a minute, lemme sit an ya can sit on my lap." He held his hand out to help her up. She was instantly relieved. Surely if it was something bad he wouldn't want her on his lap.
When she sat his arm wrapped right around her as he took a sip from the glass he held. She laid her head on his shoulder waiting to hear what this was that seemed to be weighing so heavy on his mind. He set the glass down on the small table then reached his hand under her chin and tilted her face up, looking in her eyes. His face was so serious she started to get nervous again, "Daryl?"
He took a deep breath, cleared his throat and asked, "Yeah so, do ya think we should get married Beth? I mean ya know I wanna if ya wanna."
If she hadn't been so stunned by his question she may have laughed at the way he asked it. But she didn't laugh and she didn't tease because she realized the seriousness of his question, and she knew Daryl was not a man to ask it if he wasn't ready to take the step. She had to tread lightly.
She smiled as sweetly and sincerely as she could when she answered, "Daryl I don't know what to say, I hadn't expected you to ask this right now. You know I love you but it just seems like we've already moved so fast with everything. Maybe it's time to slow down for a while, just let things be what they are. Do you think maybe we should get used to living our lives together before we take the next big step?"
She wanted to die when she saw the look that came over his face and she knew she was the one who put it there. It was easy with a big strong man like Daryl to forget how sensitive he was, how tender his feelings could be. He shrugged his shoulders like it was no big deal, "Yeah whatever, I'm sure you're right."
She turned herself around in the chair so that she was straddling his hips and they were face to face. "Daryl please don't."
"Please don't what? I ain't doin' nuthin'." His tone had become decidedly edgy, unhappy.
"Please don't be upset with me. We said we loved each other Daryl. I know I meant it then and I don't ever expect my feelings for you to change. We made love and that was a very serious step for me. It meant everything to share that with you. I'm here now, here with you and Timmy. I wouldn't be if I wasn't committed to you, committed to us and committed to Timmy. I just think we should give ourselves time, just a little time to adjust to all these changes. Okay?"
He reached over took the glass from the table and drank the contents in one gulp, "Yeah sure whatever ya want."
She put her hands firmly to either side of his face, not so much caressing as making it so he had to look at her as she looked seriously into his eyes, "You stop it Daryl. Don't you make me get angry." Then she loosened her hold, moving her face forward until her cheek rested on his. She whispered in his ear, "I love you, I'm here and it's where I want to be, here with you forever. In my heart I've made the commitment to you. I'm not rejecting you, I could never do that, and I'll never want any man but you in my life, I'm just saying let's wait just a little while. Now please, stop feeling hurt and angry. Please talk to me."
She was right, he had to knock it off and he knew that. He pulled his face back just enough so he could look in her eyes again, "I'm bein' a dick, ain't I? I'm sorry Beth. You're right. I guess there ain't nuthin' wrong with waitin' a while. If waitin's what ya want then waitin's what we'll do."
He'd said those words but what lay behind his eyes were the words unspoken, those eyes told her of his sadness. She moved her hands through his hair and her lips to his. She kissed him in a way that at first was sweet and tender and loving, but soon it turned more passionate, more intense. She leaned back and looked in his eyes once more, "Take me to our bed Daryl, please."
He didn't say a word, he stood from the chair with her still in his arms and carried her to their room, stopping only long enough to lock the bedroom door. He laid her down on their bed and stood next to it looking down at her, never taking his eyes off of hers as he loosened his belt and then quickly undressed. They made love but it was very different than the night before, he was different. She felt that need from him and it was strong but it was more than just physical need or an expression of love. She could swear she felt that emotional need too. He needed to know they were still solid, that she still wanted him. She did everything she could to show him her love.
She was up early with breakfast going when he and Timmy came from the bedrooms, already dressed and ready for work. "Ya gonna go with us today Beth?"
He seemed far happier this morning. Maybe the love they made and the good night's sleep had helped him feel better about her decision to wait. "I was thinking I'd stay home this morning and get my clothes and things put away. Do you mind if I rearrange the drawers and the closet to get my stuff in them? I don't want to just go through your things."
He looked so serious, "I ain't got nuthin' I need ta hide from ya, ya do whatever ya need ta do ta get yourself moved in. It's your home now too Beth. Me an Timmy are gonna be workin' right over at Horvath's this mornin' so we can come home for lunch, if ya want us to."
"Of course I want you to, that would be great."
He put a big bite of his eggs in his mouth, seemed to swallow without chewing and snorted out a small laugh, "I'll see if I can't give them folks sumthin' ta talk about." She had just taken a drink of her coffee but managed to get it swallowed before she began laughing too.
Timmy just looked between the two adults wondering what was wrong with them and went back to eating his eggs and grits.
She insisted she'd do the kitchen work, she knew he felt guilty leaving it to her but she convinced him it was fair. Once the kitchen was clean and the house tidied up she took her bath and then set about putting her things away.
She decided the dresser was the place to start. Maybe it would work for them to have "his and her" sides. She began by removing all of his things and setting them on the bed. Daryl didn't have much, just a few pairs of boxers, a second pair of sleep pants, a few t-shirts and socks. She smiled to herself thinking how he had the idea of getting by with only what he needed down to a science.
It was in the top drawer, the one where he seemed to "stash" things other than his clothes. She'd been in the drawer that night he came home injured getting the bottle. She hadn't noticed the big manila envelope then. It had been such a high stress, crazy and emotional evening.
At first she just set the envelope on top of the dresser, it wasn't her business. But it was like the darn thing was looking back at her, wanting her attention. She was so curious she could hardly stand it, and hadn't he said he had nothing to hide from her? She knew she was justifying something that was wrong, but Beth was human and she just couldn't stop herself. She carefully opened it and slipped out the contents.
It held Timmy's adoption certificate with Daryl listed as the father. It made her smile and she felt her eyes get moist. There was a smaller envelope, maybe 6x9 inches and she whispered, "forgive me" as she opened it. It held two photographs and she knew right away who those young boys were in the first photo. Daryl's hair was quite blond then. Not as curly as Timmy's, more like a little wavy. He was about seven years old and already had the hard look of a child living a tough life. The other boy was much older, maybe 17. His hand rested on Daryl's shoulder and there was no doubt in her mind it was his brother Merle. He was tall, lean and muscular, but his eyes like Daryl's had the hard look of a hard life.
Her heart ached for the two boys in the photo. She thought of how different their lives could have been if their home life hadn't been so harsh. But her mind also went to the reality that had things been different there would not have been Timmy. Like so many things life seemed to throw at a person this was one she was relieved hadn't been placed in her hands to decide.
The second picture showed them older. Daryl looked to be 18 or 19 and Merle closer to 30. They were both wearing leather and looking like very tough guys. Merle had on a leather jacket, Daryl wore a leather vest with a plaid shirt under it, the sleeves of the shirt had been torn off.
She stood just studying the picture for a long while. She stared at their faces and especially the eyes. She decided then it was true what they say about the eyes being the window to the soul. Both had such a cold look in their blue eyes. They looked like hard, rough and even mean men. The sort of people you'd cross the street to avoid walking by. She knew that this was her one glimpse of the man he used to be.
She shook herself back to the moment. She carefully put the certificate and the pictures back just as she'd found them, and then neatly put both his clothes and hers away in the dresser.
It was then she moved on to the closet and it was there she found another piece of his past. Way in the back and over to the side hung what she knew was the leather vest he wore in the photo. It was heavy, laced up the sides, and on the back was a pair of angel's wings. As rough as he'd looked in that old picture, she thought she might like to see him in this vest. Daryl was a man who deserved to have an angel looking over him.
She got the closet organized much like the dresser, his clothes on one side, hers on the other. She felt a little embarrassed when she compared the amount of clothes she had to the amount he had. The whole time she'd spent working the images of Daryl and his brother as boys, and then as young men played on her mind. She couldn't keep the sadness quite at bay as she thought about how hard their young lives had been. She felt she understood even better now what a huge change Daryl had made in his life. What a monumental break from his past he'd manged to pull off.
But the sadness came in knowing that he and Merle had to go through the terrible things they lived through as children. Just seeing those pictures made her somehow feel she knew Daryl better. Who she knew now was a man who was so humble in his way, rough looking and yet so loving, an amazing person who had risen above his past. He'd built a good life for himself and the small boy, and now for her.
She heard the truck pull up in the drive and watched out the window as he got Timmy from the truck, roughed a hand through his hair and kissed the top of his head, before setting him down and taking his hand. Her heart was so full she felt like it couldn't possibly hold any more love for him.
They walked in the door and he put an arm around her, "Hey you, the men are home an one of 'em is real hungry." She felt the little arms wrap around her leg then, squeezing with all their might as the sweet little voice said, "Hungwy pwease."
"I have something to cure that, you wash up and lunch will be on the table, alright?"
"Yes Bef."
As she watched them walkaway from her toward the bathroom she found herself hurrying to catch up to Daryl, wrapping her arms tightly around his waist. He stopped and she held her body close to his as she laid her head on his back. "I love you so much. " He thought he might have heard a cry in her voice and he quickly turned around to look at her. His hands were on her shoulders and he simply asked, "Okay?"
"Yes, I'm okay I just love you and admire you and respect you so much." He was baffled by this sudden expression of love and admiration that seemed to come out of nowhere. He put his arms around her and pulled her into his chest, "Beth I...well I ain't sure what's goin' on but ya know I love ya." They just stood there holding tight until again the little voice said, "Hungwy pwease."
That night after they'd put Timmy down she knew she had to tell him, it had been eating at her all day. "Daryl when I rearranged the dresser today I did something terrible."
He smiled when he asked, "Ya didn't throw my favorite t-shirt in the rag bag did ya?"
She smiled at his question but shook her head as she replied, "No, it was something much worse."
His brow immediately furrowed and he shrugged in confusion as he simply asked, "What?"
She tried to steady herself, "I found that manila envelope in your top drawer. I knew what I was doing was wrong and I did it anyway, I opened it and looked at what was inside. I'm so sorry Daryl, please don't be angry."
His hand cupped her cheek, "Shame on ya," He smiled, "Just kiddin'. It surprises me a little cuz ya ain't the snoopin' type, but Beth if I'da thought of it I woulda showed ya those things. I'm savin' them things for Timmy. Them's the only pictures I got a my brother, and the one is the only one we had taken as kids. I remember we did have school pictures taken but Dixon's didn't buy no school pictures, anyway now ya met Merle. Whaddya think? Timmy's got his hair don't he?"
"Daryl you're a wonder and one of a kind. And yes, that hair was passed along for sure. You and your brother are both such handsome men, I guess that's why Timmy is so good looking."
They laughed but the laughter turned into him taking her in his arms and just quietly holding on tight. She understood, some pain never really goes away.
ooo00ooo
It wasn't long before they'd developed a routine. She went to work with Daryl and Timmy three mornings a week and they would all come home at lunch time, unless the job was too far away. On those days they took a picnic and went somewhere close by where they could sit and eat as a family. Any time they did get to come home, Timmy stayed home with her after lunch. It worked so much better for his nap time and she enjoyed that time with him. It was a similar routine on the days she didn't go with them, he and Timmy would come home for lunch and Timmy would stay with her when Daryl went back to work.
She started spending two hours every afternoon after Timmy's nap on lessons with the little boy. There wasn't a preschool close around for him, and even if there had been she knew his Daddy would not have been inclined to send him. But Beth wanted Timmy to have just that little bit of a head start. He already knew his colors but they worked on numbers and letters, she taught him children's songs and they read together. The little boy was so serious and so attentive that he caught on to things quite quickly.
Three Months Later
The dream had never left his mind. The dream he'd had when he was injured in the fall, the dream where he and Beth and Timmy were in the woods. In the dream they were sitting watching the campfire, Timmy sat between him and Beth and he had an arm wrapped around each of them. In his dream he'd felt such a powerful feeling of happiness. He wanted to do that, take them up in the woods and play that dream out. As soon as the weather was warm enough he put his plan into action.
He set up the camp tent while she and Timmy collected good-sized rocks to build a fire ring. He pulled a couple of fallen logs for them to sit on as close to the ring as was safe. He had a camp table with a lantern on it and a Coleman stove, there was an ice chest full of food and drink and they were set.
They did some walking, it was slow going as they kept to Timmy's pace. Timmy shot the little bow and then in a most serious way the small boy showed Beth how to shoot it. When her first arrow flew the little boy began clapping for her, even before he saw where it landed.
Daryl even showed her how to shoot his bow. She'd worried about the weight of it but she did manage to lift it. He'd already loaded the bolt for her and he stood behind her as she took aim and shot. Timmy was laughing and clapping when the arrow whizzed by the tree. His Daddy smiled at her, "Ya done good, ya got a good eye Beth."
Later that evening they sat around the campfire toasting marshmallows, and simply enjoying the peace of the place and the fact that they were together. Timmy sat between he and Beth and he had an arm around each of them, just like in his dream. His Daddy noticed Timmy was almost asleep there on the log. The nights were still so chilly Daryl got him in his footed pajamas and in his sleeping bag.
When the little boy was all tucked in for the night Daryl rejoined her by the fire. His arm was around her shoulder and he asked, "Are ya happy Beth, are ya happy with this life?"
"I never imagined my life could be this happy and this full, I'm positive it's as close to perfect as life gets."
"I'm the same. I still can't believe it's real, it seems too good like I'ma wake up some mornin' an find out it was all just a dream."
"It's real Daryl and we're living it." She turned then, so that they could look at one another face to face. She lay her hand softly on his cheek, "Yes."
"Yes?"
"If you still want to then yes Daryl, will you marry me, please?"
He knew then his dream had come true as he was overcome with the most powerful feeling of happiness.
ooo00ooo
Chapter 14: Chapter 14
Summary:
Chapter Text
ooo00ooo
They held tightly to each other not speaking and not moving. They were taking in the emotion and the weight of the moment, it was almost as though they were breathing it in, all of it. The level of love they felt and the decision they'd made were powerful. He pulled away first but only so he could hold her face in his hands while he kissed her. He still couldn't quite believe what was happening and as he looked into her eyes he questioned, "We're gonna do this, get married, right Beth? It's gonna happen?"
"Yes Daryl, we're going to do it and it is going to happen unless you change your mind."
"Yeah I think we both know that ain't gonna ever happen. Damn, I wanna make love ta ya so bad right now."
That idea was going to take a little planning. They were all sharing the tent and there was no way they'd be making love in it while the Timmy slept next to them. The truck didn't seem right, and they couldn't go further into the woods and further from the little boy.
Daryl's desire spurred his creativity. He got in the tent just as quietly as he could. Timmy was sleeping soundly, oblivious to his Daddy and what he was doing. What he was doing was slowly and noiselessly taking her sleeping bag and his from the tent. When he'd gotten the bags out he silently zipped the entry flap to the tent closed.
He unzipped one of the bags and laid it fully open on the nearly flat ground, before unzipping the other and laying it on top. They took their boots off and slid in between the two. He had himself undressed in record time but it took her just a little longer and he volunteered, "Lemme help with them panties. I'm gettin' pretty good at that." He always knew how to make her laugh but she was trying so hard to keep quiet.
The ground was just as hard as Georgia clay gets and he slid his hands up under her arms, in one swift move he was on his back and she was on top of him. "Ya better stay topside or your little ass is gonna be hurtin'."
Again she was suppressing her laughter. She could tell by the way he was teasing around and having fun with all this just how happy he was. That was what she wanted him to feel always, happy. She moved her hands through his long hair, looking down into his eyes, "You are the sweetest and most thoughtful man in the world Daryl, along with being the goofiest sometimes. I'm so lucky that you love me, but what about your ass?"
"I call bullshit, I think I'm the lucky one here. An my ass ain't the ass I'm most interested in."
The ground was indeed hard and things got a little awkward more than once. There was also the light wind that sneaked in between the sleeping bags a couple of times, definitely bringing a chill with it. But things did not get awkward enough and there was not enough of a chill to cool them down. It's hard to say what could have dampened their spirits, or tamped down the pleasure they took in each other.
Spent and still breathing hard from their lovemaking they lay there resting, Beth still atop him and his mood still playful, "I gotta figure out who the hell I'ma be able ta trade work to. I need someone who'll pay me with a big ass diamond ring."
She nearly lost it then, burying her face in his neck while she tried to muffle her laugh. She made an attempt to get a little bit serious with him, "I think you know I don't want some big ass diamond ring. What I really want is for you to find me a ring, and make it a small ass ring please. Something you think is perfect for me. Whatever you come up with is what I'll love because you picked it."
"That sounds a whole lot trickier than me findin' someone ta trade me a big diamond ring."
"I agree but it'll also be the most special ring in the world, because it will be the one you chose for me. I don't care about fancy and expensive Daryl, I'd much rather have something simple and from your heart."
It was the purity of her love and her complete acceptance of the man he was that got to him, that made him feel so at peace and so happy. He brought her closer to him and they lay like that a few more minutes before he said, "We best sneak in the tent an get some sleep. I'll go get ya your sleep stuff just in case Shadow wakes up." He smiled and lightly slapped her bottom as he moved out from under the sleeping bag. She thought of how much he'd changed when it came to "them," how he'd eased right into this closeness with her. She didn't doubt for one moment that marrying Daryl Dixon was a very good idea.
They weren't far from home, Daryl never liked to venture too far with Timmy, and Sunday morning they decided to break camp right after breakfast. They wanted to get home, clean up and make the drive over to the farm to tell her Mama and Daddy their big news.
She called her Mother to let her know they were going to stop by and Mama stayed true to character, "Oh good, how nice. Let's see, I'll fix Daddy a snack to tide him over and we'll hold dinner until you get here. I have enough for an army. Oh my, I'm going to get some cookies in the oven right away for my Timmy."
Beth was happy and full of gratitude that her folks completely accepted Timmy as their own. The best part was the feeling was mutual; he loved them as much as they loved him. "You know you spoil him Mama, you don't have to rush to make cookies or a pie, and Daddy doesn't have to play checkers with him or take him fishing every time we come over."
"Don't you try and tell us what we need Miss, we know exactly what we need to do." They both laughed softly and Beth didn't bother to argue, "That's right Mama you do whatever you want."
Her parents were aware of Daryl's earlier proposal. Beth told them a few days after it happened when she and Timmy took a drive to the farm for an afternoon visit. She hadn't wanted to take the chance that her Daddy would question Daryl again about plans to marry, she knew that would be rubbing salt in a wound. So that day while the little boy was having his nap in the guest room, Beth told her parents about Daryl asking her to marry him and how she'd asked to wait. Her parents were confused and Hershel questioned, "But daughter you're living with Daryl as his wife, why wouldn't you marry him?"
"Daddy it isn't that I don't love him and don't want to marry him, I do. It's just that I think we should give it a little time to settle in not just for Daryl and I, but for Timmy too." They hadn't been any more happy with her decision than Daryl was, but just like him they had to accept it.
Now she was excited to tell them that she and Daryl had decided to marry.
Beth could hardly take her eyes off of Daryl as he drove them to the farm. He felt her eyes on him and he questioned her, "Is sumthin' wrong, am I drivin' too fast, drivin' too slow? What?"
"Nothing's wrong I was just looking at you and thinking how happy I am we're getting married."
He turned his attention away from the road only long enough to glance at her for a second, "Yeah well just when is this big tadoo gonna happen? An is that what we're havin'? Some kinda fancy weddin'? You'll wear a big white Cinderella dress an me an Timmy'll wear monkey suits, is that the plan? I mean I ain't fightin' it, I'm just wonderin' is all."
She couldn't help laughing, "Daryl do you really think I want to rip you completely out of your comfort zone for a wedding? It's your wedding too. I don't want to just make me happy I want this to be about us. It's about you and me making a lifetime promise to each other and to Timmy. You're not a monkey suit kind of man and I'm pretty darn sure I'm not a Cinderella kind of woman. I was thinking we'd either have the wedding at the farm or in our yard, either would suit me just perfect. That means outside and I don't want to be wearing a long gown walking around in dirt, clay and grass, so I was thinking of something quite a bit more casual than Cinderella. As for you and Timmy, I think you should be the one to decide what you two are going to wear. You always look handsome to me."
"K we'll wear our pajamas."
"I swear Daryl ever since you accepted my proposal you've gotten so silly. But that does sound perfect, I want to see you parading around in your jammies in front of everyone, that will be a very special wedding day treat."
She could tell he was trying hard not to laugh when he pursed his lips, nodded his head and answered, "Jammies it is then. Serious though Beth, don't ya want me ta get all fancied up?"
"I told you you're going to decide what you and Timmy wear. Fancied up is not the way I think of you, but if that's what you want then I'm all for it."
She glanced in the back seat to see how Timmy was reacting to all their wedding talk, but the little boy was sound asleep.
"This is like the ring ain't it? You're tryin' ta make me be all responsible for my own stuff. That's a lot more work for me than if I just let you decide everythin'. Besides, if you was makin' all the decisions I could just complain on accounta bein' all uncomfortable."
"That's right Mister Dixon, you have my evil scheme all figured out now."
"When are we doin' this thing? Sooner or later?"
"I know Mama is going to want us to have a proper wedding. I'd like to do that for her, within reason. Maggie and Shawn both eloped and I know she was kind of hurt by that. Anyway, I can't imagine it taking much more or less than six weeks to get organized. Where do you want to have it, our place or the farm?"
"I kinda wanna do it at our house cuz it's our home an ya got the yard looking so pretty with all them flowers you an Timmy planted. But then I'm thinkin' what if everyone hangs around a long time, if it's at the farm it don't matter, we can just leave."
"That's true, the farm may work to our advantage."
"Damn, I just thoughta sumthin' else."
"What?"
"A honeymoon, where we gonna go? Where do ya wanna go?"
She was starting to feel bad for her poor husband-to-be, at the rate he was going he'd worry himself to death before they ever had a wedding. "We don't have to decide anything right now Daryl. I'd be fine going camping for a weekend, but I think I'd want to wait for the weekend after the wedding, when things have calmed down."
"You'd be happy with campin'? No trip to Florida or the Bahamas or sumthin'?"
"No I wouldn't want to be away from Timmy for more than two nights."
That's when it hit him, for some reason he hadn't thought about that. He was mentally chewing himself out that it hadn't occurred to him, but then it was something that was difficult for him to think about. "Leave Timmy?"
She heard it in his voice and she understood, "Daryl we don't have to leave Timmy, I'd never insist on that. We can take him with us, I won't mind I promise."
She saw him chewing that bottom lip, and then he did something she hadn't seen in a long time, he started chewing the side of his thumb. "Stop Daryl, you're overthinking this. I swear it's no big deal. Please."
"Yeah, k." She knew he'd worry about it for at least the rest of the day and evening. Just when everything was so happy between them, there was suddenly a little thorn poking out at them.
As they pulled up in the drive Mama and Daddy both came through the screen door waving and with big smiles. Timmy had wakened and he was so excited to see where he was, "Man an Papa!"
Her Mama was at the Suburban and opening that back door at just about the same time Daryl turned the key. She quickly got him out of his car seat and she was holding him close, his little arms were around her neck as she told him, "Timmy I missed you so much! I'm so glad you came to see me."
Daryl thought he was keeping his voice down when he muttered, "Ya just seen him Friday mornin'."
"That's right Daryl, and for your information I've missed him a lot since then."
Daryl looked over at Beth and smiling he told her, "See there? Ya get that feistiness a yours from your Mama."
As soon as Annette put the little boy down he ran to the porch where Hershel stood waiting, "Papa fish?"
"I don't think we're going fishing today son, we're a little later than usual. I'll tell you what, how about you come with me and look for some chicken eggs?" And they were off to the coop.
An hour alter they were all enjoying a dinner of Mama's chicken and dumplings when Beth caught everyone by surprise, including Daryl. He thought it would be his job to tell them, but it was Beth who said, "Mama and Daddy I have an announcement. This weekend I asked Daryl to marry me and he said yes." She saw Daryl's neck turn red and she quickly took his hand, "It's true Daryl that's how it happened."
"Yeah well I asked ya first."
"Let's just say we asked each other, the good news is we're getting married!"
Mama and Daddy were all smiles and both were looking misty eyed, Mama asked, "When, where?"
"The 'where' is we're hoping right here at the farm, and 'when' is depending on how soon you think you and I can pull this thing together. I thought you and me could do the planning Mama, I just want you to know we want it casual, not too much fuss. I've given Daryl his jobs to do. Daddy your job is to give away the bride and Timmy's is to be my other escort."
Daryl looked at her and then to her Daddy, "See how she already thinks she's the boss a me?"
Daddy just smiled, clapped Daryl on the shoulder and said, "Get used to it son."
Mama's tears were right there on the verge of falling, "I'm so excited for you two and for Timmy. I can't wait to start the planning. Can you come over tomorrow Bethie?"
"Sure Mama, Timmy and I will come over in the morning, right after Daryl leaves for work. I have to get the names of the people he wants to invite too."
ooo00ooo
They put Timmy to bed, tucking him in tight and telling him to have sweet dreams about camping and fishing and shooting his bow, they kissed the little boy and told him how much they loved him and walked hand in hand from the room.
Before they sat on the couch she wrapped her arms around him tightly, "There's something I want Daryl, something I've wanted for a long time, ever since I saw it."
He was baffled, "What Beth? Ya know I always try ta give ya what ya want."
"You'd have to be willing to let Mama and Daddy watch Timmy, at least for a little while. It would just be during the day for a few hours, not overnight. What I want is for you to take me for a ride on your motorcycle."
He took her face in his hands and the look he gave her was so intense she almost felt overwhelmed by it, "Ya mean it? You'd do that? Get on that motorcycle with me?"
"Of course I would Daryl. I could tell that day you showed it to me how much it meant to you and that you missed it. Timmy's a very lucky boy, you've been willing to give up so many things in your life for him. I don't think you have to give that up if you don't want to."
"Yeah but Merle…"
"I know, but we know Merle wasn't exactly being careful, you would be."
"Ya think maybe Saturday? I'd wanna look it over real good, maybe take it out just by myself for an hour or so, make sure it's runnin' right. I could do that one day this week while Timmy's nappin'. And a helmet, ya gotta have a helmet and a good leather jacket, just in case there's a spill it'll save some skin." She could tell by how fast he was talking he was excited and his mind was racing.
"So you'd be okay with Mama and Daddy watching Timmy for a few hours next Saturday?"
"Yeah it ain't that way for me Beth, them watchin' him durin' the day I got not problem with that. It's the all-night stuff I can't quite get square in my mind."
"Okay, baby steps then. Maybe you can rearrange some work tomorrow morning since I'm going to have Timmy with me at the farm. It would be the perfect time"
"Yeah, yeah I bet I can. K, that's what I'll do. I can't believe how excited I'm feelin' about this. I try not ta think about the bike an how much I miss it. Thanks for this Beth." His mouth was on hers and his deep kiss felt emotionally charged.
When he moved his lips away to look her in the eyes again, she told him, "There's one more thing I really want Daryl, unless for some reason you don't want to."
His brow furrowed as he asked, "What's that?"
"I want you to wear that vest I saw in the closet, the one with the angel wings on the back."
If possible that intense look that had yet to ease up became even more intense, and she could tell her request had stunned him a little. He answered, "I ain't worn it in years but if ya want, yeah, okay."
It was later that night, they'd made love and were both ready for sleep. As they lay in bed curled up, her head laying on his back and her arm wrapped around his waist, she tentatively questioned, "Can I ask you something personal?"
"Ya always make me nervous when ya start out a question like that. Just ask it ta me, ya know I'ma answer if I can." Worrying maybe he'd sounded a little too harsh he took her hand and held it against his heart.
"Okay, what do these tattoos on your shoulder blade mean?"
He softly snorted, "That means I's a dumbass kid that got some weird tattoos a demons. I spent a lotta time since wonderin' why. It don't have no heavier meanin' than that Beth. I ain't possessed or nuthin'."
She couldn't help laughing a little at that, "If I thought you were possessed I wouldn't be laying here all cuddled up with you. I just thought maybe it had something to do with the angel wings, that it was all tied together."
"Nah it don't. I love ya, now go ta sleep."
She burrowed in even closer, "I love you too."
The next morning he made a couple of quick phone calls and was able to rearrange his schedule, so he could check the bike over and take it for a short ride. "I got everythin' squared away. I'll get the kitchen cleaned, y'all go ahead ta your Mama's an I'll see ya tonight, k?"
"I could help Daryl."
"Nah I got it." As soon as the words were out of his mouth he suddenly moved to her, taking her in his arms and holding her tightly pressed against him. He buried his face in her shoulder for a minute and then in an emotion-filled and raspy voice whispered, "Thanks for this Beth, for sayin' we should go on the bike, for wantin' ta do this with me. I didn't even know how much a part a me that bike is, not 'til ya said we should ride it. I can't believe ya want ta share this with me, but I'm so damn happy ya do. The wings on the vest don't mean nuthin', it's you Beth, you're the angel."
They held each other close and it could have been they were both fighting tears.
She and Timmy were at the farm by 8:30 and she smiled when she saw her Daddy on the front porch. He was rigging up two fishing poles, one of them was quite small and he had the little life jacket leaning over the porch rail. Daddy didn't take any chances with children near the water. "Bethie did you bring me a fishing buddy?"
The words were barely out of his mouth when the little boy stood in front of him patting his knee and smiling, "Papa fish?"
"That's right we're going to see if we can't catch us a big fish today, alright? Do you feel strong and ready?"
"Yes Papa."
"Well then you give your Mother," Daddy caught himself then, looking at Beth like he'd stunned himself, "Give Beth a hug goodbye."
The little boy was oblivious to the slip as he tightly squeezed her leg, "Bye Bef."
She thought it best to just let it go by for now, she bent down kissed his little cheek and said, "You have fun Timmy and take good care of Papa, okay?"
"Yes Bef."
Her father's words got her thinking, and not for the first time, about if and how her role would change. In many ways she already acted as Timmy's Mother, but she still had the mindset that all decisions regarding the little boy were Daryl's. She didn't feel she was really an "official" parent to the child. She made up her mind then, she and Daryl needed to discuss this and soon, before the wedding.
As she and her Mother sat at the dining room table Beth couldn't help laughing, "Mama you can't invite every person you ever knew, we should think about maybe cutting the guest list back just a little, okay?"
"Well daughter why don't you tell me how you see the big day, what is it you and Daryl have in mind?"
Beth took her Mama's hand, "I do want some of the traditional stuff Mama. I'd like our preacher to do the officiating but I want it here on the farm. I was hoping we could set something up down by the water. I want Daddy to escort me and I'm hoping Maggie can make it here and stand up with me. Besides all of that though, it's also really important to me to think about Daryl and Timmy and the simple lifestyle we have together."
"I want Daryl to be comfortable at his own wedding and enjoy himself and what we're celebrating. I don't want him to feel like he's just enduring something and can't wait to break free. I want Timmy to feel like it's a happy occasion too, not just a bunch of crazy stressed out adults. So it seems best if we try to keep it pretty casual, okay?"
"Absolutely, tell me more about what you and Daryl would want. I want you two to have the wedding you envision, just like Daddy and I had the wedding we wanted."
Her daughter smiled, "You're the best Mama. I was thinking we could do a very brief ceremony. No big speeches or vows we write ourselves. When Daryl and I talk like that to each other we do it in private. I don't want him thinking he has to get all romantic in front of half the county."
They both laughed over that and Mama said, "That doesn't sound much like Daryl, does it?"
"No it doesn't. I thought we'd pile the sideboard and dining room table with lots of good southern food, and everyone could just help themselves. We could set up lots of folding tables and chairs outside so no one has to try and eat while they're standing. There's something else I thought would be so much fun. I'm hoping I can get some people I know to bring their guitars, fiddles and banjos. We could have some fun mountain music playing. Does that sound reasonable Mama?"
"I think it sounds perfect for the two of you. We'd better get busy with our plans."
"Wait just a minute Mama, I want us to have an understanding. I don't want you thinking you're going to do all the cooking. Daryl and I talked and he said he'd pay someone to do it, we don't want you having to work so hard for our wedding."
"Bethie do you know how many weddings I've helped with? Family, friends and women from church. I've spent hours and hours cooking for other people's children's weddings. I plan to start talking to the best cooks from that vast group. It's time for your Mama to start calling in favors."
"I love that idea, but if we don't get enough helpers then we're going to let Daryl do things his way, alright? He'll be so upset if he thinks you're working too hard."
"I love my new son-in-law."
Beth was smiling at her Mother, "I'm happy Mama because he loves you too. I have a favor to ask you. Daryl and I want to have a little time together Saturday, just he and I. We were hoping maybe we could bring Timmy by in the morning, if you and Daddy would be willing to watch him."
"It's about time we got him all to ourselves! We were beginning to think you two would never ask. You just bring him over any time, we'll be waiting."
That evening after Timmy was in bed Daryl shared his news, "That damn bike purred like a big ol' kitten Beth, I can't wait to get your little self on the back of it."
"Well I can't wait either and Mama and Daddy are so excited to have Timmy coming over. Please, I don't want you to worry either, I know he'll have fun. After all, we know they'll be spoiling him rotten."
"I know an it ain't that I'm worried they won't take good care of him, an I ain't worried he won't have fun, it's me Beth. I'm the one that don't like bein' away from him."
She loved that core honesty of Daryl's, and the fact that as they'd become so close he freely admitted to her the truth of his feelings about things. "That's why we're just taking baby steps Daryl. When it comes to Timmy I would never ask you to leave him if you weren't 100% okay with it."
It seemed best so she changed the subject and told him all about her and her Mama's talk. Then he had a little surprise for her, "I's at Miz Heywood's for just a minute helpin' her move some heavy boxes. I told her you an me was gettin' married. She wants ta make the weddin' cake. She's a real good cook an I told her I thought that sounded real nice. I been worryin' ever since ya might be mad."
"I'm not mad at all Daryl, I keep telling you it's your wedding too. I'm happy and grateful she wants to help and I'm sure it will be wonderful." She didn't want to tell him she was a little concerned, she'd only met the woman once and then only briefly. A wedding cake was a pretty big undertaking and a lot to trust a stranger with. She'd meant what she said though, it was Daryl's day just as much as hers.
She had other feelings about the situation too. She knew the older lady called him far more often than she really needed him, and she knew he went over to check on her more than she needed him to. Beth had come to think the woman was almost like a grandma to Daryl. Whatever it was, there was a closeness between them. She wasn't taking this away from him. No matter what kind of disaster the cake might be, she knew her Mama and the other ladies well enough to know there would be every kind of pie, cupcake and cookie to choose from. And Mrs. Heywood's cake just might turn out to be the best thing she'd ever tasted.
Saturday morning came and she knew she and Daryl were both almost too excited. They had trouble just eating their breakfast. "Guess what Shadow ya getta go over ta Ma'am an Papa's house for the whole day. Gonna have some fun I bet ya. I gotta do some stuff an so does Beth, but we'll be back for ya around dinnertime, K?"
The little boy was looking between the two adults and smiling, "Man an Papa." He clapped his little hands together and Daryl just looked over to her, "See it ain't him, it's me."
He drove Timmy to the farm while Beth got the kitchen clean and herself ready. She'd just gotten her hair in a ponytail when she heard the truck pull back in the yard.
His voiced sounded so happy as he called out, "Anyone around here ready for a bike ride?"
"I am. Let's go!"
"I just gotta get one thing." He went in their room and came back out wearing the vest. She could swear she heard her heart pounding just at the sight of him in it. That didn't even come close to the thrill she got climbing on that bike behind him and just holding on tight.
ooo00ooo
Chapter 15: Chapter 15
Summary:
Chapter Text
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She thought it would be a lot of fun doing this with him, this thing she knew he loved so much. It had been obvious to her since that day in the shop it symbolized something. It meant more than just a fun activity to him. She hoped that soon he would tell her a little about what that was.
What she hadn't expected was the thrill and the sheer exhilaration she felt when the tires of the big bike hit the pavement, that's when Daryl goosed the throttle. She knew then why he'd told her to hold on tight, not that she'd planned to do anything else. As sexy as he looked on that bike and wearing that vest, she was hoping she'd never have to let go.
She had no idea where he planned to take her on this ride and she couldn't have cared less. No wonder he loved this feeling. Riding nowhere in particular and just feeling the power of the bike, the speed and the freedom. She was already thinking they had to arrange to do this a lot more often.
Although he hadn't been on the bike but for a few minutes since Timmy had come into his life, he'd spent years prior to that on one bike or another. As much riding as he'd done never had it been more fun or more thrilling than it was now. Beth was with him, holding him tightly and sharing this feeling of freedom and the open road with him. He never wanted her to let go and he never wanted the feeling to leave.
They'd been riding for what she thought was an hour or so when he pulled the bike off the two lane, heading up a one lane hard packed dirt road. She noticed when they hit the dirt he immediately slowed the bike down, it seemed he was being more cautious. They rode for what felt like two miles or so, and then she saw it. It was a small lake surrounded by majestic old growth trees, and it was so beautiful and pristine.
He pulled the bike over onto a flat grassy area and immediately removed his helmet, turning his head as much as he could to look back at her with a smile. "Hey you, ya doin' okay back there?"
She took her own helmet off, grabbed him even tighter and laughed as she told him, "I LOVED it Daryl. Oh my gosh that was so much more fun than I ever thought it was going to be. No wonder you've missed it!"
Now he was smiling that rare smile of his, the one that seemed to engulf his whole face. "Ya got no idea how happy ya just made me. I's afraid you'd think it was too fast or too dangerous, or too uncomfortable or too sumthin'." Then he cautioned her, "Be careful gettin' off now, hold onto my shoulders." She didn't really need him to tell her to hang onto him, she wished she never had to let go.
Her legs felt a little wobbly at first but the feeling soon left as they walked hand in hand toward the water's edge. "This is beautiful Daryl I'm surprised you've never brought me here."
"It's a place I used ta come a lot, back when I's tryin' hard ta get my head outta my ass. I'd just come an think, try ta decide what it was I really wanted an what I wanted my life ta be. When Merle died I brought him and Timmy's Mother here an I scattered 'em. I guess you're not really allowed ta do that shit, but who's gonna know? Besides they're dead, it don't matter." There was no denying Daryl was his own man with his own way of seeing and doing things.
She wrapped her arms around him, looked in his eyes and whispered, "I think that's beautiful. You brought your brother to a place that you felt was special."
He'd been as hyped from the ride as she was and now with her holding him that way he didn't hold back. He held her head between strong hands and kissed her hard and deep. When their lips parted he buried his face in the curve of her neck and just breathed her in, "Damn Beth, ya always know what ta say."
They walked around holding hands and talking about Merle. Daryl told her a little more about the man that had meant so much to him. "Yeah before Merle started gettin' himself fucked up on dope all the time, this woulda been just the kinda place he wanted ta be. He liked the feeling a just drinkin' a couple a beers and catchin' a fish or two. When he'd come ta a place like this it was the only time he really seemed ta know how ta relax, quiet down an just be. Now he's here for good."
That's when she found out what the bike riding meant to him, as he told her, "Ridin' was always sumthin' I loved an wanted ta do. Not just cuz of all the things folks think it is, the freedom and the speed, no confinement. But it was more, it was what Merle an me had. Ridin' was the one thing we never fought about an the one thing that got us ta stop fightin'. If one of us said let's 'ride it out' that's what we did. Ya get over shit that way."
In some ways what he said seemed sad, yet Daryl didn't seem sad. It was more like he was at peace with it when he was here. He'd done the most he could and the best he could for his brother.
"Let's go do some more ridin', we could ride over ta Smithton an have us some lunch."
She gave him her best suggestive smile and kittenish voice when she responded, "I'm just riding, I go where you go."
"Stop it. You're gettin' me excited just thinkin' about stuff, stuff that ain't got nuthin' ta do with that bike." He gave her one more of those hot kisses before they got on the big bike and headed back toward the highway.
Smithton was a 20 mile drive and as far as she was concerned it went too quickly. They found a small diner and she watched him with an odd mix of wonder and admiration. He devoured a double cheeseburger like it was a small cracker. That was just before he ate what looked like a pound of fries. "Is that all yer havin' is that salad Beth? Don't ya want some real food?"
"Daryl it has cheese and chicken and even a hardboiled egg on it, I'd say that's real food. At least it's real enough for me."
"Huh. I'd starve."
They rode home without stopping and she wished for just a few miles she could pull the helmet off and feel the wind blow through her hair. It would be dangerous and foolish, but the idea of it was appealing.
When they were back at the house and off the bike he looked at her with that wry little smile, "We got time before we gotta go back ta your folks."
She knew exactly what he was talking about and she just smiled at him when she said, "Let's."
He grabbed her by the hand and they were both laughing as they practically bounced up the porch stairs and back to their bedroom. It had been a day that had been fun and thrilling and had brought them even closer as a couple. The mood of the day followed them into the room and they were hurriedly peeling off clothes while they smiled at each other.
She stunned him when, just as he was crawling in bed she said, "Put the vest back on."
He froze for just a minute, looked in her eyes and said, "Serious?"
"Heck yes I'm serious."
"Man one ride on a motorcycle an ya get all kinds a kinky on me. I like it."
High from the ride and from the freedom they felt, from the love between them and just a little extra spice, the love they made nearly wore them out. He pulled her close, nuzzling into her hair and softly stroking her back, "We got time for a 15 minute nap before we gotta go act like a nice Mama and Daddy."
She was certain he didn't understand the weight the words he'd said carried, but she did. They meant something to her. This wasn't the time to talk about it. She didn't want it to be a rushed conversation. Later when Timmy was asleep they could talk and hopefully come to an understanding that worked for both of them. It needed to happen before the wedding.
Her mind was racing. Rather than sleep she just basked in the feel of his strong arms around her and his sleep sounds.
They pulled up in her folks' driveway and Daryl felt a twinge of disappointment, Timmy hadn't come running out the door to greet him. He knew the feeling he should probably feel was gratitude. Apparently his son was so comfortable here and enjoyed himself so much, he was fine without his Daddy being around. Even when you see the positive though, it doesn't always mean it makes you happy.
When they walked in the kitchen door he saw a big part of the reason Timmy was so content. Mama was up to her elbows in biscuit dough and the little boy was sitting on the counter, munching on a cookie and drinking homemade apple juice. "Hey Shadow, did ya miss Daddy even a little?"
"Miss Daddy." The little boy nodded and smiled as he held his arms out to Daryl, and all was right with the world.
Beth kissed her Mama's cheek, "Thanks for this Mama, we had so much fun."
"Daddy and I have told you both many, many times now, we're willing to care for Timmy anytime you let us."
Beth took her own turn for Timmy hugs then, and putting her arms around the little boy she told him, "I missed you Timmy."
"Miss Bef." Those little lips went into an exaggerated pucker and she happily accepted that kiss and all the love behind it.
They liked giving Timmy his bath together, kneeling next to the tub with Beth washing the little guy's hair before Daryl took care of what he called "washing the undercarriage." Bath time had gone from being nightly trauma for Daryl and Timmy, to being fun family time with the three of them. Timmy even had bath toys now, something Daryl never knew existed before Beth came into their world.
They tucked the little boy in, gave him kisses and told him how much they loved him. They smiled when they told him to have good dreams about fishing with Papa, and helping Ma'am fix dinner.
They walked hand in hand to the living room, but when they sat on the sofa and Daryl reached for the TV controller she reached out and took his hand, "Can we talk for a minute first?"
He always looked so concerned when it was her that wanted to talk, "Yeah sure, did I do sumthin' wrong?"
"Daryl, I never act like you did something wrong," She put her hand through his hair while she told him, "I'm not saying you're perfect but you're close enough for me. I just want to talk to you about me and Timmy."
"You an Timmy? Like what, there's a problem?"
"No there's no problem. I love Timmy and I know he loves me. What I don't know is how you feel about all of this. We're getting married in five short weeks. I just want to understand my place here. I know I'll be your wife and I'm so happy and excited about it, I can't wait for that Daryl. What I don't know is who I'll be for Timmy. I do all the Mom things but I don't make any decisions regarding him, about anything. That's all on you and it works for now, but what about when he gets a little older? Am I always going to just be 'Bef' or will I be his Mama?"
The look on his face said 'confusion' and he expressed that. "I thought ya already was the same thing as his Mama. I guess I shoulda brought it up an we shoulda talked about it. I just assumed ya knew that's what I intended. I don't know why I always act like you're a mind reader. But yeah Beth, I want ya ta be his Mama an I trust ya ta always do right by him. Ya done so much for him already. I'll call that lawyer I worked with, the one who helped me adopt Timmy. We can have it fixed so it's all legal an whatnot. I mean if that's what ya want."
She felt the tears rolling down her cheeks as she told him, "It is what I want, I do want to be Timmy's Mama. I understand exactly what you meant when you told me how he came to be yours, that even if he'd been born to you, you couldn't love him any more than you do. I feel the same way about him. But Daryl a lawyer's bound to cost a lot of money and you're not working for that man, there's nothing to trade."
"I got money, I got a lotta money."
"What? How?"
She was surprised when he laughed and looked a little embarrassed, and then he rolled those shoulders and told her, "Ya know them come-ons for accidental life insurance? Those free policy deals ya get, where ya figure what they're tryin' ta do is suck ya into buyin' some expensive insurance plan? Well I guess Merle got one of 'em in the mail. He wasn't one ta turn down sumthin' someone was gonna just give him. He probably filled out the paper when he was drunk or high or both. Probably didn't even know what the hell he was doin', but it paid off. I can afford ta do this, we can afford it. I been savin' the money, thinkin' if Timmy needed anythin' I couldn't buy him, or wanted ta go ta college or sumthin' I'd have it for him. I can't think a nuthin' Timmy needs more than for you ta be his Mama."
With that she lost it, she was crying and he misunderstood. "I'm sorry Beth, shit I wasn't hidin' nuthin' about it. I know I ain't gonna spend it so it's like it ain't even there. I just don't think about it is all. Please girl, don't cry no more."
She regained her composure wrapping her arms around him, he was relieved and quickly put his arms around her, drawing her as close to him as he could get her, "I'm sorry Beth."
"I'm not crying because I think you kept something from me or because you hurt my feelings. I'm crying because I'm happy and I'm overwhelmed and it's like my dreams are all coming true. I love you Daryl and your quirky ways."
"Quirky?"
"I mean that in a good way." That made them both laugh a little but then she made the move on him, all those powerful emotions had to go somewhere.
ooo00ooo
The Wedding Day
They wanted this more than anything but that didn't mean they weren't both nervous. For Daryl it wasn't about the vows or how the food turned out, how they looked or any of those things that seemed so inconsequential. For him it was just having all those people staring at them during something he thought was private. Wasn't it really just about the two of them?
He hadn't told Beth that though. He knew she was trying to make this special for both of them. He figured she probably really would have wanted one of those big full-on and fancy weddings, if she thought he'd like it. So he was going to do this much for her. He had a smile on his face and plenty of love in his heart and whether or not this was his ideal, it was going to be good. In fact it was perfect because he was marrying Beth. That was the payoff, she was going to be his wife and whatever it took to make that happen was what he had every intention of doing.
He and Timmy hung out with her Dad and her brother Shawn and her sister's husband Glenn. So many new people had entered his life. Her whole family had come out for the big wedding. He liked everyone, it was just that there were so many new ones all at once. It turned out to be good though, they were warm and welcoming and he found himself genuinely having a nice time with them.
There was a real pretty archway her Daddy had built when her sister got married. They'd set it up down by the water and some of the ladies from the church had decorated it with flowers. There was a small raised platform below the arch where he'd stand with Beth, her sister, the preacher and Timmy. He wasn't having a "best man" he just wanted Timmy up there with him. Her brother would legally witness for them.
He couldn't believe the way her Mama's church friends had turned it out for them. There was more food than he'd ever seen in one place. All the tables and chairs in the yard were covered with pretty tablecloths and had bouquets of flowers on them. He had to admit it looked beautiful and he did feel appreciative that so many had done so much for them. A lot of those people he didn't even know.
He was really looking forward to hearing the pickers that had shown up. There was a husband and wife who each played guitar, a young woman who played the fiddle and a banjo picker. He was glad Beth had thought of mountain music, it suited the day and the feel of the outdoor wedding and he felt like it suited them.
Maggie, Mama and Beth were all upstairs in Beth's old room. Her sister was trying to get Beth's hair to calm down and go the way she wanted it too. Maggie finally got so frustrated she just blurted it right out, right in front of Mama, "Oh what the hell Beth, Daryl probably likes you best with bed head anyway."
Mama tried hard not to laugh when she scolded, "Margaret Greene Rhee that is no way to talk to your sister on her wedding day. Or any other day for that matter."
Beth couldn't control her laughing and she found that the laugh helped to ease the little bit of nerves she was feeling. She just wanted to get this ceremony started and make her lifetime commitment to Daryl, there was nothing she wanted more than to be his wife.
There were no long walks down the aisle and no row upon row of white chairs for the guests. This ceremony wasn't going to take that long. Instead the guests stood to either side of the archway, where the preacher, Daryl and Timmy stood waiting. When all were assembled Maggie, followed by Beth holding on to her Daddy's arm, emerged from a stand of trees and walked toward Daryl.
He broke out that big smile when he saw her. She wore a short pale pink lacy dress, tight at the waist and just a little bit of fullness to the skirt. The neckline was modest and her jewelry was at a minimum. Her hair hung down in what seemed like a million curls with flowers woven in. As far as he was concerned she was the prettiest woman in the world.
She looked at him and Timmy waiting for her. Her husband-to-be and their son. Daryl wore black pants and boots, but his shirt was white and he'd put on a thin tie. She loved that he'd thought he should do that. Timmy's Levis were black and he also wore a white dress shirt, but what really brought the smile to her face was his little black bow tie. As far was she was concerned Daryl had done just right in choosing his and Timmy's attire. They were a little dressed up but they still looked like themselves.
Her Daddy left her there next to Daryl and she leaned and kissed him before he went to stand with her Mama, "Thank you Daddy."
Timmy grabbed her leg and hugged it tight, "Bef Hungwy pwease." There was soft laughter from the guests and a big smile from Beth and Daryl. She rubbed a hand through his curls and said, "Hey Timmy. Daddy and me have something to do real quick, then we'll have some lunch, okay?"
"Yes Bef."
The preacher was suppressing his own smile and didn't waste any time getting the ceremony underway. He spoke just briefly on what the meaning of marriage and commitment were, and they freely made their promise to love and care for each other always. Daryl slipped the ring on her finger and she could hardly take her eyes off of it. The silver ring was so unique, she'd never seen another like it. Now she was anxious to ask him the story behind it.
When the preacher pronounced them husband and wife her new husband must have thought that was his cue. He didn't wait for the man to say, 'You may now kiss the bride.' Daryl instantly had his hands in her hair and his lips on hers. The guests were laughing, clapping and cheering and he was so caught up in the moment he didn't even notice.
Timmy had no idea what was going on but he started clapping and cheering with the rest of the group. Daryl picked the little guy up, the the three of them hugged tightly and Daryl told the child, "Shadow ya got a Mama now, son. Beth's your Mama."
She saw the tears in Daryl's eyes just as she felt the tears in her own. When the little boy touched her cheek and said, "Mama," the new husband and wife both let those tears fall.
She'd miss being called Bef but it was going to be so much better being Timmy's Mama.
Things calmed down a bit when the guests started filling their plates, and she took her opportunity to get Daryl alone. "This is the most beautiful and unique ring I've ever seen. Where did you find this Daryl?"
"I kinda made it."
"What does that mean, 'you kind of made it'?"
He shrugged, "Well I got the idea from that song you're always singin', that Tom Waits song, "Hold On." There's a line where it goes 'and a ring made from a spoon.' It give me an idea. I seen over at Miz Heywoods' she has a set a real old silver that came from her grandma. There's these tiny little spoons I guess was for some kinda dainty salt bowls or sumthin'. They were real pretty with that little flower design an delicate lookin', like you. I ask her could I buy one off a her an she ask me what the hell for. When I told her what I was gonna try n do she said she wouldn't take no money. I told her I wouldn't take it for free. We was arguin' over it just a little, havin' a standoff for a minute right there in her kitchen. We finally settled on me givin' her a ride ta Atlanta next month. She's got an old friend there she was wantin' ta call on. She said if you an Timmy wanted ta come too maybe we could go ta the aquarium or sumthin' while she visits. I didn't wanna tell ya any a that 'til after I give ya the ring."
"Daryl I think about it all the time but I don't think I tell you enough, you are an amazing man. I love my ring and now that I know the thought that went into it, I love it even more. I wish I could have seen you and that sweet old lady having your standoff over the spoon – I'll bet that was a frame-worthy moment."
"My gosh and she did such a beautiful job on the cake, it looks professional. I know she's dear to you and she's dear to me now too. As for Atlanta, I'd love to take Timmy to the aquarium. I love you Daryl and I love your way of being."
"That's good cuz now you're stuck with me forever." He said it in a joking manner, but then he took her in his arms pulled her close and kissing her slow deep and professing his own love.
There had been a few more successful 'day stays' with Ma'am and Papa and Daryl had decided it was time to take the big step. They'd made a honeymoon plan and Timmy was going to stay at the farm. Daryl and Beth would leave early Monday morning and just ride. There would be no structure to the trip and no real destination in mind. They'd stop to eat when they were hungry, and they'd stay where the bike and the road took them. Just for three nights though, that was a big enough step for both of them for now.
Christmas Morning
It was hard to believe just a year had passed since the first Christmas they'd spent together. So much had changed, and as far as they were concerned all those changes were for the better. They were married, they were a family. She was now legally Daryl's wife and Timmy's mother. There was no better gift she could ever be given than those two things.
Daryl's thoughts were the same, having Beth in his life had made everything so much better. Never could he have ever imagined he would feel this happy and this loved. As for Timmy, he knew there was no better Mama for the little boy than Beth.
The coffee was percolating in the kitchen and a fire burned in the old wood stove. They were on the sofa under a nice warm afghan Annette had made for them. Her head lay in his lap and he absentmindedly ran his fingers through her hair.
They were both watching the blinking lights on the small tree, admiring all the new paper snowflakes they'd made and listening to the Christmas music coming over the radio. The presents waited under the tree festively wrapped in the comic pages they'd been setting aside all year. They were enjoying this quiet time before Timmy woke. "It sounds like your coffee's ready Daryl, let me get you a cup."
"Nah Beth ya ain't gotta wait on me."
"I know I don't, that's why I want to."
"Bein' stubborn again, ain't ya?" She just smiled as she went to get him a cup.
She'd just handed it to him when Timmy came padding out of his room. He climbed up on the sofa and right in between them, and they loved him awake. "I think Santa come ta see ya Shadow, did ya see? He left ya sumthin' under the tree."
The little boy came to life and he was so excited as he opened his gift from Santa and then his gift from his Daddy and Mama. He was also very proud to give his Daddy the gift Beth had helped him make. It was a braided leather key ring for his work truck and shop keys. "This is just what I been needin' son, it's perfect. Ya done so good, I'm proud of ya an I'ma be proud ta show it off ta folks too."
Beth hadn't thought her gift to him was much, but judging from Daryl's reaction it couldn't have been more special. They'd agreed just one small present each and she'd gotten him a new leather sheath for his knife, complete with his initials. "Man I's just thinkin' I had ta breakdown an get me a new one. I wouldn't a picked one this nice though, thank ya Beth, it's just right."
He gave her a pretty pair of small silver earrings he thought came close to matching her ring. "Oh Daryl they're beautiful I love them, they're just perfect." As she spoke she'd slipped them in her ears.
Timmy had colored a family portrait of them for her. She got a big kick out of the stick figures and especially the way he'd pictured her husband's hair and her body. It was the most adorable thing she'd ever seen. She kept her face serious though as she told him, "I'm going to buy a frame for this Timmy and I'm going to hang it right here in the living room. I don't think we could have a better family picture. Thank you so much." The best part was when he crawled in her lap for a snuggle and simply said, "Mama."
Daryl stood then, "Me an Timmy got one more thing we gotta get outta the shop. C'mon Shadow." She couldn't imagine what they were doing, they'd agreed on just one gift each. Five minutes later the door opened again, she was on her feet as she watched them carry it in.
"That's the most beautiful cradle I've ever seen Daryl. You made that?"
He and Timmy both had ear to ear smiles, "Not by myself, Timmy here had ta help me. He don't want his baby sister goin' without a bed."
Her smile was as big as theirs as her hand rested on her ever growing tummy, while at the same time quiet tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'm so lucky you two found me, I can't imagine having to live my life without you."
Daddy and son both hugged her then, Daryl resting his hand atop hers and their baby, "That ain't right Beth, we're lucky we found you, you brought us everythin' we'd been missin'."
ooo00ooo
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gneebee on Chapter 15 Thu 24 Oct 2024 04:15PM UTC
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gneebee on Chapter 15 Fri 28 Mar 2025 12:54AM UTC
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