Chapter Text
Lance had done some stupid things in his life, but this was the absolute stupidest.
How had he let this happen?
He’d been suspicious, but he needed proof before he began freaking out. Ruling out the idea of Coran or the questionable Altean medical equipment, Lance had broken away from the group during a visit to the Unilu space mall. He’d found a pharmacy shop that had sold health and beauty items for hundreds of alien races.
Glancing around nervously the entire time, Lance had located the collection of pregnancy tests. He couldn’t read any of them, but the packaging with photos of smiling parents and happy babies was universal it seemed.
Unsure of which one would work, if any, he’d grabbed them all.
And now here he sat, on the closed lid of his toilet, six positive pregnancy tests staring him in the face. Four others hadn’t registered anything, but absolutely none of them had come up negative.
That was probably a bad sign.
”Fuck,” Lance whispered into his palm, his other hand clutching the front of his shirt, right over his lower abdomen.
This couldn’t have been worse.
They were currently in space, in an intergalactic war, he was a pilot of the machine that was supposed to save billions of life forms, and now… he was pregnant.
And to top it off, the father didn’t even want him.
Lance closed his eyes, but tears spilled down his cheeks regardless.
It wasn’t fair!
Lance had done everything right. He’d warned Shiro of his impending heat with plenty of time for them to move out of Galra territory, keeping Lance and everyone else safe. The Alpha had been so sweet to him, telling him everything would be alright, flooding Lance with calming pheromones to prove it.
He’d quarantined himself away, nesting on the lowest floor of the ship, far from where anyone traveled. Lance had made sure he had everything he’d possibly need – a nearby bathroom, lots of blankets and towels, wet wipes, a bright pink dildo to get him through the worst of it.
Everyone on the ship knew what was going on. Hunk and Pidge had been supportive and helpful during the beginning of his estrus, eating snacks with him and just generally providing the comfort and love his Omega heart craved. Even Allura and Coran, who didn’t quite understand the secondary sexes of humans, realized that this was a sensitive time for Lance, and did everything they could to help him prepare.
Shiro had been extra nice, going out of his way to touch Lance more often, soft brushes of his large hand on the small of Lance’s back, or his shoulder. Praising him for little things, making Lance blush and preen every time. The Alpha’s scent had helped him relax and feel safe, something that was crucial for his heat to go well.
Keith though….
The paladins had been aware of Lance’s secondary sex from day one. He’d never hid it in his life, like some Omega’s did. He had a birth control implant that prevented him from going into heat, and dulled his scent just a bit, but anyone who had the ability to breath and identify scents could tell once stepping within five feet of him. They’d been in space for years though, and his implant had expired, Coran cutting it out of his arm a few months back.
It had taken some time, but his scent eventually returned in full. Lance probably never would have noticed it if it hadn’t been for Keith.
They had become friends, he thought.
They still bickered, but it was less mean and more funny, joking. They even trained together sometimes.
But then suddenly, it was like day one again. Worse, even.
Keith wanted nothing to do with him, going out of his way to avoid Lance, and being out-right hostile to him when he couldn’t. Lance wasn’t one to take abuse lying down, and he gave back as good as he got.
It wasn’t until they were screaming at each other, reaching across the dinner table, Lance’s hand moving to his Bayard, that he even begun to understand what was happening.
Shiro was out of his chair like a shot, grabbing Keith and throwing him against the wall. Similarly, Hunk was holding Lance back, his big arms wrapped around the tall Omega, making calming noises that fell on deaf ears.
Shiro took Keith out of the room, his hand on the back of his neck scruffing the younger Alpha who looked murderous. With his aggressor gone Lance loosened, relaxing against the larger Beta.
“What is with him?!” He shouted, gesturing towards the two men who had just left. “It’s like he’s lost his mind lately!”
The others seated at the table exchanged a look before turning to Hunk, who sighed.
“It’s your scent, Lance.” He said, not unkindly. “I don’t think Keith’s ever been around an Omega before, he doesn’t know how to handle it.”
“Like hell! I’ve been sharing a ship with that asshole for years now!”
Hunk looked slightly embarrassed, “Well yeah, but now you actually smell like an Omega. Or like, ya know, an Omega ready to breed.”
Lance paused, taken aback. He had noticed a shift in his scent lately, but it wasn’t anything different. He still smelled the same, just a little more… cloying.
“But…” he paused, blushing. “Isn’t an Omega’s scent supposed to make Alpha’s nicer? More… friendly?”
He looked at Pidge, the youngest of them but often the smartest.
“Well, uh-“ She pushed her glasses up her nose, as if trying to hide her face. “I think your scent is making Keith feel… too friendly. He doesn’t know how to handle it so instead of the usual response he’s being…”
“A total asshole.” Hunk finished.
Well at least everyone else could see it, and it wasn’t just Lance being overly sensitive.
With his new-found knowledge, Lance went out of his way to avoid Keith too. It wasn’t his fault he was an Omega, and it wasn’t his fault Keith couldn’t control himself.
But it kind of was, wasn’t it?
Lance had managed to turn the quietest, most behind-the-scenes guy on the team into a raging lunatic just with his pheromones. And it was only getting worse the closer to his heat he got. He felt like an instigator, the match to Keith’s increasingly short fuse.
He started staying away from areas where he’d run into Keith, training as far away from him as possible. Even when they formed Voltron, Lance put everything he had into blanking out his mind, keeping his thoughts small and hidden.
It was putting a strain on the team, and Lance knew he was to blame.
This feeling must have started showing on his face, because Shiro pulled him aside one night, when Lance was deep in estrus, his heat only days away.
Pushing him into a dark hallway, he pulled Lance into his chest, pressing the Omega’s face into his neck, right below the scent glands in the hollow of his throat. Heavy arms wrapped around his thin shoulders.
Lance instantly felt relaxed.
“Just give him time,” Shiro’s deep voice rumbled in his chest. “This isn’t your fault, Keith just needs to work through some things.”
Lance nodded, not saying a word. He was worried if he opened his mouth he might moan.
Shiro squeezed him once and then was gone, rejoining the group as if he hadn’t just gotten Lance back into the right mental space for his heat with a single hug.
So yeah, Lance had done everything right.
What happened during his heat wasn’t his fault.
He knew that, rationally. But he still couldn’t help feeling like he could have tried harder to stop it.
Keith had showed up in Lance’s nesting space two days into his heat.
Lance was naked on his knees, back against the wall and facing the doorway when the Alpha walked in. Four fingers of one hand buried in his asshole, the other pulling at his nipples, scratching his chest until he bled. His eyes were closed, and his ears were filled with the sound of his own rushing blood, but he didn’t need either of those senses to recognize Keith’s presence.
It was the scent.
Keith smelled like heaven.
Lance’s head snapped down, eyes wide and nostrils flaring. Keith closed the door behind him, and walked barefoot across the small space, shedding his clothes as he went.
Lance’s hands moved to his knees, averting his eyes as he bared his throat to Keith. The perfect submissive posture. He didn’t even look up when the Alpha crouched down in front of him, his hand coming up to Lance’s throat, fingers sliding up into his hair.
He pulled the strands backwards, forcing Lance to look up, forcing him to look in Keith’s eyes.
They were fully dilated, the dark Galra purple completely gone, nothing but black that seemed to go on forever. Even the whites looked wrong, slightly red and irritated, like he’d been crying.
Lance knew in that moment that Keith wasn’t in his right mind.
A better person would have stopped him, pushed Keith out of the room and called someone to make sure he didn’t come back.
But Lance was weak.
And worst of all… He was in love with Keith.
Months upon months of subtle – and unsubtle – flirting, pining from afar, hoping and wishing that the Red Paladin would notice his feelings. It had made Keith’s recent shift so much harder bear.
Despite what Pidge said about Keith liking his scent too much, it was obvious from his behavior that he did not want to be attracted to Lance.
Keith didn’t want Lance, but the Alpha inside him did, and in that moment, that was enough.
He whimpered then, his eyelids sliding shut, as Keith leaned in to scent him. He pressed his nose tightly against the Omega’s shoulder, sliding up behind his ear to the source of his scent, just below his hairline. Briefly, Lance thought of Shiro, the way he had pulled Lance into him, to let him do this exact thing. This made him remember Keith’s own scent glands, and he leaned forward slightly, licking the Alpha’s throat.
Keith growled, and Lance felt his loosened asshole gush slick.
Keith must have been able to smell it because he went wild, manhandling Lance until he was splayed out on the floor in front of him, bent over on his hands and knees.
Presenting.
Lance could barely breath with how turned on he was, and Keith wasted absolutely zero time with preparation as his shoved his thick, Alpha cock inside his ass. Lance keened, his back arching until his face pressed against the blankets on the floor.
Lance had a brief moment of clarity to regret the fact that he hadn’t gotten a good look at Keith’s dick.
The Alpha set a bruising pace, his right hand coming down to press Lance’s face further into the blankets, left clutching his hip. Keith fucked him so ruthlessly it felt like he was punishing Lance for something. For bickering and sniping. For the weeks of fighting and avoidance. For being an Omega.
Lance hated how much he loved it.
It seemed like no time at all before he was coming, his heat and hours of fingering himself ramping up his sensitivity until his small useless cock was spilling thin, impotent semen while his asshole clenched down around his assailant.
Keith seemed to like this, if his growling was anything to go by. He pushed Lance even further down, until the Omega’s hips were flush with the floor and Keith’s entire body covered him. There was no pause in his thrusting, his cock driving even deeper inside Lance as he rutted up into him, using his hands on the floor for leverage.
It was at this point Lance realized he was crying, snot and tears smearing into the blankets, his mouth open and leaking drool as he panted. He cringed, knowing Keith must have found him disgusting despite the way his knot was swelling and pressing against the rim of Lance’s hole.
Without warning Keith knotted him, shoving his dick as deep as it would go until he popped past the tight ring of Lance’s asshole. Lance couldn’t help the way he screamed, as his body shook with the most intense orgasm of his life. Keith was moaning harshly as he shot his load as deep as he could get it, his hips grinding into the ass below him in an effort to prolong the feeling.
Lance panted, as he lay crushed under the heavy Alpha, tears leaking from his eyes. Keith rolled them over, his arm coming up to rest over Lance’s side as their breathing evened out. Lance couldn’t seem to stop crying, and his shoulders shook with his sobs until Keith finally brought his hand up against his chest, attempting to sooth him until his swollen knot went down and they could separate.
They hadn’t kissed. Keith hadn’t spoken a word to him the entire time.
When Lance woke up he was alone.
What followed next was the most hellish three days of his entire life. His body had gotten a taste of an Alpha’s knot and now nothing would satisfy his desire. He fucked himself uselessly with the dildo, bawling as he tried to come but he couldn’t bring himself off even once after Keith had left.
When he showed back up in the castle proper, things went on as normal. Like actual normal. His scent had regulated to something much less fragrant and overwhelming, and Keith went back to treating him how he’d always treated him – like a slightly annoying brother. He never spoke to Keith about what happened, and Keith never brought it up.
Everyone breathed a sigh of relief that life was back on track.
And if Lance found himself crying before he fell asleep most nights, that was fine. He was fine. He’d get over it. He had to.
It was Pidge of all people who noticed his scent.
Pidge was unpresented, which was unusual by her age but not enough to be worrisome. Pidge certainly wasn’t mad about it, she often said she was in zero rush to be a slave to her hormones.
Everyone was praying she’d be a Beta.
They were sitting together on the floor of Lance’s bedroom, staring at a ridiculously small screen with controllers in their hands, thumbs moving a mile a minute.
“It smells weird.” She said, distractedly.
“Uh, rude,” Lance started, never taking his eyes from the screen. “I picked up before you came in, and I keep it pretty clean in here, alrigh-“
Pidge cut him off, “No, it’s not your sweaty gym clothes.” She rolled her eyes and paused the game.
“It’s something else… not bad weird, just… different.” She looked at him and tilted her head, “Did your scent change?”
Lance felt his stomach drop. He’d been so incredibly worried after his heat that someone would be able to smell Keith on him. Smell what they had done. He’d showered like crazy after his heat, sinking his fingers deep into his ass to try and remove any lingering fluids. His skin had been red from scrubbing by the time he was done.
But it had been three weeks, and no one had said anything, not even Shiro - who, as an Alpha, had the strongest sense of smell next to Keith.
“Oh uhm, maybe?” He laughed lightly, desperate for her to not make a big deal out of it. “Maybe it’s just leveling out, after being on birth control for so long?”
Come on, Pidge. Just let it go. Please.
She shrugged and turned back to the game, “Oh yeah, probably.”
Lance almost crossed himself, and they went on to play more until she spoke again to say, “It’s actually kind of nice.”
Lance blushed.
But that conversation sat heavy in his mind, especially once he started getting sick.
The first time it happened it was admissible, and everyone had laughed as he hurled in the sink after trying a new recipe from Hunk.
The next time was less justifiable, as he’d been leaving the training room, exhausted beyond words. Lately, all Lance wanted to do was sleep, drowning in the depression that was his life post Keith’s knot.
He was midsentence, talking to Shiro about battle formation tactics when his stomach rebelled, forcing him to stop and hold his mouth as he gagged.
Shiro froze with surprise before moving towards Lance, his arms grasping the Blue Paladin’s shoulders. “Are you okay? Do you need some water?”
Lance squeezed his eyes shut, breathing in through his nose and out through his mouth, nodding at the other man. Shiro handed him the water bottle in his hand and Lance took a long drink, his stomach calming.
He looked at Shiro’s concerned face and laughed softly, “You’re supposed to move back when someone is gonna barf, not rush into the splash zone.”
Shiro smiled but his heart was clearly not in it.
“Are you sick, Lance? You’ve been a little off lately.”
Well actually Shiro, your little friend fucked me during my heat and subsequently broke my heart. I haven’t eaten decently in weeks and a black fog of depression is choking me with every breath I take. Oh, also I cry myself to sleep every night. Does that count as sick?
“I’m fine!” He laughed again, touching his stomach. “I think Hunk’s breakfast venture isn’t settling well.”
They started back down the hall, Lance putting every bit of energy into being his normal, perky self.
“Alright, but if you’re feeling sick, you need to let me know so we can get you some medicine. Do you think Altean medicine would work on us?” He looked at Lance who shrugged uselessly. “Well we’d figure something out. We can’t have you out there fighting the Galra while you’re throwing up, Blue Lion might spit you out.”
Lance laughed for real at that.
“Hey, if Yellow Lion can handle Hunk, I think Blue can take a little barf.”
“That…. is a really good point.”
Lance continued to throw up, but now he made sure to do it secretly, carrying a toothbrush and mouthwash in his jacket pocket at all times.
Only once did he almost get caught, slipping out of a bathroom after quickly darting in to hurl, by Keith of all people.
The Alpha was watching him with an odd expression, which morphed into bored annoyance when he saw Lance staring back.
Five weeks post heat was when it hit Lance.
It had been easy to ignore the symptoms, so entrenched in his own misery. Of course, he was tired, depressed people often slept more than normal. And his lower back aching, it was probably from spending so much time in bed. Plus training! They were always training.
The throwing up was weird, but maybe he’d caught some space bug. That happened, right?
No, all of that was explainable. What really made him realize it was his tits.
They were aching. Constantly. His nipples were puffy, and so sensitive he could barely touch them, his soft shirts providing too much stimulation.
He took a rough jab to the chest while sparring with Hunk one day. It should have been nothing, maybe unsteadied him a little, but instead it brought him to his knees, tears in his eyes.
“Oh my God, dude,” Hunk rushed over. “Did I hit you hard? I didn’t even realize!”
Lance squeezed his eyes, willing the tears away before he stood up, holding out a hand to stop Hunk.
“I’m fine,” he panted, “just a little tired.”
Hunk gave him an odd look, knowing for a fact that Lance had gone to bed early the night before and slept in late that morning. He didn’t push the Omega though, and they ended their practicing to head to the kitchen for a snack.
The next day he asked the team to stop by the Unilu mall.
Everyone had noticed Lance’s recent downturn in mood, and it seemed like so long since he had voluntarily called attention to himself that Shiro and Allura immediately agreed and they all went together a few days later.
That trip had brought him here, lying on his bathroom floor, crying.
Lance was so sick of crying.
He rolled over on his bathmat, squinting against the florescent lighting, his hands resting lightly on his abdomen.
There was a baby in there.
Well, not a baby… but the beginning of a baby.
Half of him and half of Keith.
He was going to be a mom. And his baby was going to have no father.
That was fine. People did that all the time now. This wasn’t the old days, they weren’t going to pin a scarlet letter to his shirt. He’d spent so much time around his younger siblings and nieces and nephews, he’d be a great mom. The best there ever was, even without a dad around.
Keith can never know. Fresh tears welled in his eyes at that thought and he released a shuddering breath.
That brought up a whole new set of worries. How was he going to hide this? It was one thing to conceal his feelings about Keith and what had happened, it was another thing entirely to hide a pregnancy.
He pictured the team finding out and flushed with shame. He imagined Shiro’s voice, heavy with disappointment as he said Really, Lance? You couldn’t even control yourself for one heat?
Lance pushed himself into a sitting position then stood up.
Get your shit together, dude. He thought, looking at himself in the mirror.
He looked awful, his eyes red and puffy, his skin broken out and oily, hair in all directions. He’d stopped taking care of his appearance after the heat. What was the point? He’d literally been splayed out naked on the floor, his scent at its most appealing and still an Alpha had been able to walk away from him.
He turned sideways then and pulled his shirt up to look at his stomach. It was flat, the muscles there light but firm. He placed his hand over his abdomen, where he knew he’d start expanding soon.
A baby.
Lance pulled off his clothes and moved into the shower, scrubbing himself down with his favorite body wash, shaving his legs and armpits while he deep conditioned his hair. Afterwards he stood in the mirror plucking his eyebrows with a pore strip over his nose. This made him think of Shiro and he laughed. It was the first real laugh he’d had in days.
After a facemask and night cream, Lance changed into a pair of soft pajamas and laid down in bed. He put his hands over his stomach gently. He’d figure it out. He’d come up with a plan. He could do this.
Lance dropped off to sleep, eyes dry.
+
It was only a few days later when Lance was finally able to sneak into the med bay without raising suspicion. Shiro was still worried he was sick, had even commented on his change in scent. Despite taking more care with his appearance, Lance still looked less than stellar.
Weren’t pregnant people supposed to glow? Lance had got the short end of the stick on that one, because he just looked greasy and bloated.
Pulling up a screen, silently thanking Pidge for having developed a translator program, he typed in the word - pregnancy.
Hundreds of articles and files popped up. Eyes widening, he updated his search to say – human pregnancy.
A handful of articles popped up.
Opening the links, he found the first few to be complete nonsense and a couple others to be on par with elementary school sex ed. Ready to give up he clicked on the final link.
Now we’re talking.
Inside the article he found extensive details on the human reproductive system and gestation. Everything looked accurate, from what he could tell, so he scrolled down to where it said – week six.
His baby was the size of a sweet pea.
He looked down and his stomach and considered that, the little pea inside of him. Crazy.
Everything else looked on par - morning sickness, constipation, fatigue, sore breasts. Nothing to be worried about. Lance saved the article, with its week by week break down, to his personal data pad and headed back to his room for a nap.
He was almost to his door when he smelled him. Keith. Heading to his own room, sweaty and out of breath, clearly coming from the training room. They were going to have to walk right past each other. Lance tried to decide how much dignity he was willing to lose by sprinting to his room.
Keith seemed fine. Like he and Lance were totally cool now that Lance didn’t smell so fuckable. Like he hadn’t ripped out Lance’s heart and turned his life upside down in the process.
“Lance,” he nodded in greeting, casual as ever.
Lance on the other hand, was not. The smell of Keith right then. It was almost exactly like that night. Sweaty and dominating, it was clouding the Omega’s head and bringing a flush to his cheeks.
He nodded tightly at Keith, holding his breath as they passed, trying to keep from inhaling the Alpha pheromones.
Keith shot him an odd look but didn’t comment and Lance finally made it to his door.
Once inside he leaned back against the metal surface, sliding down to the floor, gasping for air that wasn’t Keith flavored.
Who was that guy out there?! How could he be acting so normal, after everything that had happened? Lance was literally submerged in despair, every waking moment a reminder of what had happened and what they had done. And Keith was just Keith. Same as ever.
Lance was eight weeks – his baby the size of a raspberry – the first time he felt it.
It was like a hunger pang but more… primal. Closer to how he felt in heat. Needy. For something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.
Lance had been steadily gaining weight, not quite noticeable to anyone but himself. Despite how much he was still throwing up, he was stuffing his face enough to make his pants start feeling tight.
He wasn’t showing yet, he looked at his stomach in the mirror every morning, dreading the day when he started to round out – still no closer to a plan than the day he peed on ten sticks in his bathroom – but luckily, he was still mostly flat.
He was getting a little chubby though. Like water weight gain that never went back down. He still fit into his Blue Paladin suit though and that was all that mattered.
Assuming this feeling was just more of the hunger that was constantly plaguing him, Lance made his way to the kitchens, his heavy jacket wrapped around him in an attempt to hide his bloating.
The second he walked into the kitchen area though he realized it wasn’t food he was after. It was Alpha.
“Shiro.” He practically moaned it.
The Black Paladin looked up from his data pad, pushing black framed reading glasses up his face with a tired smile at Lance. He had a cup of the closest thing to coffee they could find in front of him, and loose papers scattered about.
“Hey Lance, how you feeling?” The Alpha asked, and Lance melted at the concern in his voice, before registering his question. Did Shiro know something? Was he suspicious? Had Keith said something to him?
He walked closer to the other man, trying to keep his voice light. “Fine?” He forced a laugh, “Why wouldn’t I be fine?”
He moved to sit down next to Shiro, in the closest chair despite the availability of several others that would have placed him in a better vantage point for a friendly chat. He seemed unaware of his movements, as he scooted the chair slightly closer to the Alpha, encroaching on his personal space.
Shiro looked at him, having to bend his head at a steep angle to even consider eye contact, telling Lance, “You’ve seemed a little weird lately…”
Lance laughed nervously, inadvertently shifting his scent to one of edgy anxiety, “Weird? Nothing weird here! Just uh, little tired, ya know?”
Shiro considered this, suspicion on his face, Lance’s agitated scent in his nose. “You would tell me if anything was going on, right?”
He tried to relax his body, his muscles tense at the pheromones of an Omega in distress. Lance merely looked up at him, not answering his question.
Lance for his part was losing his ability to form words, the scent of strong, dependable, trustworthy Alpha inundating his senses. This is what he’d been craving. He just needed a whiff of Alpha scent and suddenly Lance was able to breathe comfortably for the first time in days.
He leaned his forehead against Shiro’s upper arm, the muscle firm but giving, his voice small when he said, “Do you mind?”
Shiro did mind, but only because this behavior from Lance was alarming, setting off all of his protective instincts, driving home what he already knew – something is wrong with Lance.
He didn’t want to do anything that would drive Lance back into hiding, so he merely nodded, despite the Blue Paladin’s eyes on the floor and said, “Not at all.”
He was nine weeks pregnant – a cherry! – when Keith announced he was going to be joining the Blades of Marmora for a lengthy trip into enemy territory. He’d been working with them here and there and no one was surprised when he made the decision.
Shiro and Allura seemed to have been expecting it, and luckily their planning was not in vain, when the Princess was able to bond with the Red Lion. It was hardly surprising, it had been her father’s Lion before anyone else’s, but she swore up and down that once Keith returned she would resume her place in the castle.
Lance was torn. On the one hand, he would be able to live a Keith free life for a few months, finally able to relax, no longer peeping around every corner before he entered a room. Keith may have been back to normal, but Lance was anything but. Even the scent of the Alpha drove him into crushing sadness, his heart pounding so loud he was sure everyone could hear it, his hands clenching to stop them from shaking.
Not only that, but he’d be able to form Voltron without having to share himself with the man who had hurt him beyond words. Lance had grown adept at hiding himself in the mind melding formation they shared. The depression that was bringing him so low was his saving grace in that moment, as no one could filter through his thoughts beyond the dark mist that surrounded him. But with Keith gone, at least now he wouldn’t have to experience his feelings, or lack thereof.
On the other hand, Keith was leaving. The father of his child would be gone, and Lance was stricken at the thought. Although they hadn’t fallen back into their playful friendship, Keith still provided a valuable service to Lance. He was an Alpha, his scent lingered throughout the castle, and despite how miserable it made Lance feel it also assuaged his baby’s need for Alpha pheromones.
With Keith gone, his baby’s only source of comfort would be Shiro.
And Lance was avoiding Shiro.
Not quite on the same scale as his avoidance of Keith, but ever since that evening in the kitchen, when Lance had given himself over completely to his Omega instincts, he’d gone out of his way to not be alone with Shiro.
The elder Alpha was definitely suspicious.
In the end it didn’t matter what Lance felt about Keith’s departure. Keith wasn’t his Alpha and he wasn’t Keith’s Omega.
They all stood in the hangar, wishing Keith good luck and exchanging hugs. Lance knew this was coming, he’d been preparing himself for it all day, so when it finally came to him, he slipped his arms around and away from Keith so fast it barely registered as a hug.
Keith laughed and pushed him slightly, rolling his eyes as he walked away, trading last farewells with Shiro.
The next time they formed Voltron, it was like a breath of fresh air for Lance. Everyone could feel the difference, but no one commented on it.
Shiro merely looked at him afterwards, that same concerned Alpha expression he’d been throwing Lance’s way for weeks.
Despite his resolve to stay away from Shiro, three days after Keith’s departure Lance found himself outside the Black Paladin’s door.
He’d wandered the whole castle, trying to soak in the lingering scent of the two Alpha’s, trying desperately to quench that feeling within himself. That wanting.
Without thought his feet took him right to the source.
He stood there, his fist raised up but frozen, trying to talk his Omega instincts down. Lance wasn’t close to showing still but his scent was definitely changed, and any prolonged exposure within a confined space was a bad idea.
He was almost in tears, his thoughts at war with each other when the decision was taken out of his hands and Shiro opened the door.
“Were you planning to knock, or did you just want to stand in the hallway?” He was wearing those glasses again and he smiled at Lance, who felt his resolve crumble.
“Can I come in?” Lance was looking at the floor.
“Yes, of course.” Shiro stepped backwards and Lance walked past him into the room. He’d never been in the Black Paladin’s room before, but it looked like a much nicer version of his own.
“Your bed is huge… perks of being the leader?” He asked, gazing around.
Shiro laughed lightly, “I think it’s just cause I’m bigger than you.”
“Pfft,” Lance gave Shiro a faux offended look. He continued to snoop around, walking through the room, avoiding the Alpha who stood near the door, observing him.
“Everything okay, Lance?” He asked gently.
Everything Shiro did lately with Lance was gentle. It was like Lance was a bomb and he was trying not to set him off. Lance would have felt offended if he wasn’t so desperately in need of love and affection.
“Can I…” He started, closing his eyes as he felt a blush rise up. “Can I just, sit with you? For a bit?” He looked up then, making eye contact.
“Absolutely.” Shiro moved to his bed, scooting close to the wall to leave room for Lance. Picking up the data pad he’d been using prior to his arrival, he tried to look casual and inviting to the obviously distressed Omega.
“If you’re busy I can go,” Lance started, moving no closer to the bed. He was still having a hard time making eye contact and he continued to gaze around the room nervously.
“I’m not busy,” Shiro assured him, urging his scent to be as calming as possible. This was the first time Lance had sought him out in weeks. The Omega was clearly struggling with something, but he hadn’t been able to get anything out of him.
Lance meandered over to the bed, finally sitting on the edge, looking away from Shiro. Just being in his room was enough to satisfy Lance’s Omega instincts but sitting near Shiro was almost overwhelming. He began to feel his muscles loosen, his shoulders drooping in relief.
“You can lay back,” Shiro offered, he had seemingly taken on Lance’s tension, trying to figure out what was going through the Omega’s head.
Lance hummed, “I have my shoes on.”
Shiro huffed a laugh and reached out to wrap his arm around Lance’s waist, pulling him back against the pillows. Lance froze momentarily, before letting the Alpha pheromone’s lull him back into repose. He didn’t look at Shiro as he toed his shoes off, letting them drop to the floor, before pulling his knees up.
Shiro went back to his data pad, in an attempt to make Lance more comfortable, make him feel as if he wasn’t worrying the Alpha beyond words. His arm stayed wrapped loosely around Lance’s waist.
Lance let himself give in, sinking down against the bed, rolling slightly to rest his face against Shiro’s side. After a long stretch of time, he finally spoke, his words slurring from the pheromone haze he had settled in. “What’re you working on?”
Shiro looked down at the Blue Paladin cuddled into his side.
“I’m not, actually.” He tilted the data pad to show Lance a long page of text. “Do you like Stephen King?”
Lance looked up, surprised. ”You like Stephen King?”
He nodded, “I always liked monster movies, as a kid. Eventually it turned into horror in general – books, movies.”
This surprised Lance a lot… To be honest, he didn’t know much about Shiro outside of his accomplishments as a fighter pilot and everything that had been uncovered about his time as a Galra prisoner. Lance had placed Shiro on a pedestal so long ago, he’d never been comfortable getting to know him on a personal level.
He had been quiet for a long time, and Shiro seemed to have given up on a response from Lance when he finally said, “I do like Stephen King. The Shining is my favorite book. The movie was weird though.”
Shiro’s face softened. “I was always partial to Salem’s Lot. I’m reading Pet Sematary right now though.”
He paused, then said, “I could read it out loud?”
Lance felt hot tears start to well up in his eyes, what the fuck, he thought miserably. Why were his hormones so all over the place? Why was Shiro’s kindness ripping him open, leaving him a raw, emotional wreck?
Why was Shiro being so nice to him?
Not trusting his voice Lance nodded, and Shiro slid his finger over the screen quickly scrolling to the beginning of the novel. He pulled Lance in just slightly, his scent shifting subtly in a way that Lance couldn’t identify and began to read.
Lance started going to Shiro’s room every night. He’d lay in bed next to Shiro, sometimes pressed against him, sometimes on his back – eyes closed, hands resting on his abdomen as he listened to Shiro’s smooth, deep voice recite the eerie tale of Louis and Jud and the Indian burial ground behind their homes.
Every night, when he slipped out of the Alpha’s room and walked back to his own he swore it was his last. That he’d stop embarrassing himself by crawling into Shiro’s bed, practically purring as the Black Paladin read to him.
But Lance knew it wasn’t a coincidence that he’d slept better in the past week than had had in months, well beyond his heat and the incident with Keith. It was more than just the Alpha’s scent that comforted Lance, it was his inexplicable kindness and compassion. It didn’t cure his depression, but it made it more manageable. It made it so that thoughts of Keith and their baby didn’t choke Lance with grief.
Shiro never pressed him. Never asked the questions that Lance could clearly see in his eyes. He just opened his door, creating room for the smaller Omega on his bed and picked up their story without comment. It was a comfortable routine in Lance’s growing uncertainty.
On the sixth night, Lance was seated next to the Black Paladin, his head resting on the larger shoulder, his face just close enough to the Alpha scent glands that he felt pleasantly dizzy when midsentence, Shiro asked him, “Can we move?”
Lance, who honestly was expecting Shiro to grow tired of his presence at any moment, pulled back suddenly, a blush rising to his face and his hands flying up to push away when Shiro grabbed his arms.
“Relax, Lance,” he tried to imbue calm into his scent, shocked at the sudden panic he had scented in the Omega. It stung his nose, like ammonia in a confined space.
“Relax,” he soothed again, “I just want to roll over. My back is sore from reclining like this every night.”
“I’m sorry,” Lance was stricken, “I can go, you don’t have to keep reading to me, I don’t even know why I keep com-“ His babbling was cut off when Shiro bodily rolled him over, his larger frame moving up behind him in a spooning position.
Lance froze.
Shiro moved the data pad in front of them both and picked back up where he’d left off, hoping to coax Lance back into the warm, content mindset he’d been in every night since this had begun.
Sentence by sentence Lance let himself untense, his head dropping down to rest on Shiro’s pillow, the Black Paladin’s heavy arm resting on his side, moving gently with every breath Lance took. In this position he could feel the rumble of Shiro’s voice at his back, his breath warm against the side of his neck, caressing the spot where his Omega scent gland hid.
Lance didn’t even feel himself drop off to sleep.
Hours later he awoke at the feeling of someone else moving. He experienced a moment of confusion, his hand moving to his stomach – but no, it was much too early for that, right?
The lights were low, and Lance found himself disoriented when he looked around. An arm he hadn’t even realized was draped over his hip moved again, the hand coming up to press on his sensitive chest, pulling him backwards against a firm, warm body.
Awareness struck him like a wall of cold water, rushing through his veins, leaving him breathless.
He was up like a shot, startling Shiro awake, turning around to stare at the Alpha still in bed, his eyes wide. Shiro, an experienced soldier, was awake instantly, but seemingly lost for words. At his silence, Lance quickly rushed to the door, leaving his shoes near the bed, ignoring the alarmed “Lance!” at his back.
He ran back to his room, locking the door and throwing himself onto the bed.
What am I doing? He berated himself. Laying around with Shiro cuddling – because that’s what it was, cuddling, Lance could deny it all he wanted but it didn’t change the facts – while he was pregnant with Keith’s baby.
His baby. At the thought of the strawberry sized baby inside him, he sagged. Spending time with Shiro, getting to know him outside of being the Voltron leader, observing him in a soft, domestic setting. It was all a distraction. It was almost a betrayal.
The baby should have been his only focus. Coming up with a plan on what to do, where to go when he could no longer hide his pregnancy, how to get back to Earth so that he could leave his child with his family.
Or even… how to leave Voltron, for good. Raise his baby, in space, far away from the Galra and their intergalactic war.
Allura could pilot the Red Lion, she could probably pilot Blue as well, right? And even if she couldn’t, with all of the allies they gained, surely, they could find another Paladin. Someone stronger than Lance, who wouldn’t constantly embarrass everyone, who actually added to the team instead of holding them back, who wouldn’t put their selfish desires first and get pregnant because of it.
What kind of idiot got knocked up the first time they had sex?
Voltron could go on without him. But his baby couldn’t. His baby needed him, needed him to get his shit together and step up as a mother.
Lance didn’t sleep that night.
He avoided the team the next day, staying mostly in his room, or prowling the lower levels where no one ever went. He didn’t go back to Shiro’s room that night.
The next day was much the same, but the now familiar ache was beginning to settle back into him. He tried to follow the scent of Alpha without running into Shiro, but it was hard to do. Instead he wandered back down to the lowest level, where he’d spent his heat.
The scent had dissipated, but when he entered the room where he’d nested, he almost imagined he could smell Keith. Smell what they had done. He stepped into the room, sinking down to the floor, his knees pulled tight to his chest.
He was so tired. Pregnancy was wearing him thin – the vomiting hadn’t let up, and his joints ached. His chest was still a constant source of discomfort, the tissue there swelling just slightly in preparation of milk flow. He slid down further, laying on the floor, his head pillowed on his arms, giving into exhaustion.
Hands were touching him, shaking his shoulder gently. Panic set in immediately and in his confusion, Lance asked, “Keith?” while shoving as far away from the intruder as possible.
“What?” Shiro’s voice. “No, it’s me Lance.”
Lance looked up then, finding the Black Paladin crouched over him, concern in every line of his face.
“Right, sorry.” Lance struggled to sit up, trying to keep the blush off his face. He’d said Keith’s name, Jesus Christ.
“Why are you down here?” Shiro asked, his tone so serious Lance was forced to look up at him. “Please tell me what’s going on with you.” This spoken softer, pleading.
“Nothing! I’m just – not sleeping well, ya know. I went for a walk and must have fallen asleep.” Lance tried to look casual, but he knew his scent probably gave him away. The pounding of his heart was practically audible.
“Please stop lying to me Lance.” His face was so close to Lance’s. “I need to know what’s going on, so I can help. I’m yo- ugh, I’m the Alpha of this pack. I need to know how to help you.”
Lance trembled, and his eyes filled with tears.
“I can’t say.” He shook his head, dislodging the tears until they spilled down his cheeks.
“Fuck, Lance,” Shiro’s voice was raspy, full of emotion. He grabbed Lance pulling him forward, one arm holding him tight around his back while the other cupped his head.
“You can tell me, I’m here for you.” It was spoken with such resolve Lance almost told him. Almost pulled back and spilled out everything that had happened in this room and what had resulted from it.
Lance pulled away but kept his hands on Shiro’s forearms. He didn’t think he could stay upright without the other man’s support.
“You’re a good Alpha,” he spoke softly, looking down at both of their hands.
“Then why can’t you trust me with this?”
Lance sighed. “I’m just going through some stuff. It’ll pass.”
“I would love to take some of that burden off of you, Lance.”
Lance smiled softly up at him, his cheeks tear streaked, and asked the question that had been plaguing him. “Why are you being so nice to me?”
Shiro looked momentarily confused, before looking slightly pained and replying, “I’m your leader, Lance.”
Lance snorted, “I think all of this goes well beyond your responsibility as the Black Paladin.”
Shiro had a look in his eyes that Lance had never seen before. He stopped, considering, before lifting his nose a little bit to scent the air. Shiro was nervous.
Never one to equivocate though, Shiro straightened slightly with resolve before saying, “I like you, Lance.”
Lance was quick, “You like everyone…”
“No,” Shiro huffed a frustrated noise, before falling back into his comfort zone: action.
He surged forward, his hands moving to the back of Lance’s head, pulling the Omega closer, before pressing their mouths together. Lance froze for a second, shocked, before the baser side of him gave in and he mewled.
Shiro chuffed back - a primal, Alpha noise that resonated in his chest and made the Omega melt - as he plunged his tongue into Lance’s mouth, using his hands to guide the smaller head to where he wanted it.
Shiro kissed like he fought. Focused, consuming, a force to be reckoned with. Lance never wanted it to stop but of course it had to, and the Black Paladin pulled back eventually, dropping a series of smaller kisses, as if he didn’t want it to end either.
Shiro sat back, his eyes searching Lance’s face, who looked almost startled.
“Since when? Why? What- why are you, what?” He probably would have continued babbling if Shiro hadn’t grabbed his hands, stilling his nervous energy.
“For a while,” he started. “I can’t remember exactly, a couple years maybe.”
”What!” Lance jerked back, “You’ve liked me for years?! What the fuck! Why didn’t you… why wouldn’t you tell me?” How could Shiro have been harboring some kind of crush on him for years without letting him know?
Shiro gave him a look as if the answer was obvious. “Because you liked Keith.”
Lance felt like he’d been slapped. He reeled even further away, falling back on his ass, rocked to his core.
Shiro knew he loved Keith.
Well, Shiro knew he liked Keith, at least. And Shiro liked him. This whole time! It was insanity! Shiro was stunning – strong, smart, essential – everything Lance wasn’t. Yeah Lance had looked up to him at the Garrison but he’d never in his greatest fantasies considered a crush on Shiro. It would have been a waste of time and effort on his part.
Shiro was on God level. Why the fuck would he like Lance?
“Why the fuck would you like me?” Shiro rolled his eyes but Lance continued, “No, I’m serious Shiro. You’re like a billion times out of my league!”
Shiro gave Lance a look like he thought all of that was ridiculous, but it gave Lance a moment to say, “This is because I’m the only Omega on the ship.”
“No!” Shiro’s voice was so commanding, Lance was startled. “No Lance, that’s not it.”
He ran his hands through his hair, pulling the white bangs down as if to cover his face. “I just… fuck, I’m so bad at this.” He murmured to himself. “Obviously, I considered that.”
Lance flinched, despite the fact that he had offered the explanation.
Shiro went on, “You’re right. You are the only Omega for billions of miles. It may have been what attracted me to you in the first place, but that isn’t why I continued to be. It isn’t why I have feelings for you.”
This was so beyond anything Lance had ever expected. Shiro liked him and had never said anything? Madness. And what if he had? Would that have changed his feelings for Keith? Would Shiro’s affection have made him look away from the only other Alpha on the ship? Would they have fallen in love? Would he have been able to avoid everything that had happened with Keith? Could Shiro have prevented him from getting pregnant?
“I think… that I should go to bed.” Lance said after the silence had grown awkward.
“Please don’t think that my feelings for you are the only reason I want to help you Lance. Something is clearly bothering you. Is it because of the way Keith has been acting? Did you guys have a falling out?” Shiro sounded pained asking.
“I’m going to head back to my room…” He stood up, prompting Shiro to stand as well.
“I’m going to walk you there,” Shiro informed him and Lance only nodded, saying nothing as the Black Paladin followed him back up to the sleeping quarters.
When they got to his door, Lance paused, opening his mouth to speak. Shiro seemed to hold his breath, waiting to hear what the Blue Paladin would say, but Lance lost his nerve before finally saying, “Goodnight Shiro.”
“Goodnight Lance.”
+
Over the next couple weeks Lance went back to avoiding Shiro. Sometimes it was impossible. They trained as a team frequently, and they’d needed to form Voltron twice in that time while on missions.
When they were in the castle though, Lance was like a ghost. He hung around Hunk occasionally, watching as he worked on whatever machine he was currently engrossed with. He even played video games with Pidge when she asked.
Mostly he tried to be as normal as possible with them, because they were already highly suspicious of his behavior. If pretending to be his usual self kept them off his case, he could plaster on a smile and crack a few lewd jokes.
Shiro seemed to be letting Lance keep to himself, as long as he showed up for meals occasionally and didn’t miss too many training sessions.
Lance was twelve weeks in and it was starting to show. Despite the fact that his baby was only the size of a plum, his stomach was beginning to pooch out just a bit, the skin there firmer than usual.
Lying back in his bed, Lance pulled up his shirt to inspect. His tits were swollen, still small like all male Omegas, just below an A cup. If he had been on earth he probably would have started wearing a soft sports bra, just to lessen the jostling. He could just see the little hill of his baby bump, and he ran his hand over it slowly.
“Hi little baby,” he whispered, nervous to speak it aloud, despite the fact that no one would be able to hear him.
He wondered then where Keith was at, if he was safe. Imagined what it would be like if things had been better, right. Would he put his hand on Lance’s rounding stomach and talk to their baby?
As always thoughts of Keith ushered in darker emotions, the memories of their encounter reminding him of his situation and his unhappiness. He wished he had the Alpha’s scent to sooth him.
He thought then of Shiro.
Strong, supportive, wonderful Shiro.
What was wrong with Lance? After Shiro’s confession, the Blue Paladin had been plagued by thoughts of “what if” that were unfair to the older man. How could he have known that Keith would succumb to Lance’s heat scent? Or that Lance was weak enough to let it happen. It was completely unreasonable of Lance to think that if Shiro had just told him from the beginning, none of this would have happened.
Well it didn’t matter anyway. It’s not like Shiro would continue to want him when he found out Lance was pregnant with the other Alpha’s baby. Whatever Shiro saw in him, there was no way it was enough to overlook Lance’s stupidity in getting knocked up.
Thinking of Shiro brought back that hunger from before though.
Lance had been fighting his need for an Alpha’s presence, managing to get by on Shiro’s lingering scent and surreptitious whiffs of him while training.
But it wasn’t just Shiro’s scent he missed. It was everything. The way he held Lance up against his warm body, his even voice as he read aloud, the side comments they shared whenever the characters did something particularly stupid.
He and Shiro had been on a path to real friendship, and Lance felt cold at the idea that he had lost it.
He found himself outside Shiro’s door before he could talk himself out of it, and he knocked gently.
Shiro opened it faster than he ever had before, like he’d been waiting for someone.
“Lance,” there was relief in his voice. “I didn’t think…”
“How much further have you gotten in the book?” Lance asked, as if he hadn’t been evading Shiro for weeks.
“I stopped, after.” He gestured behind himself. “We can pick it back up?”
Lance nodded and moved to the bed. He noticed the shoes he left, what seemed like forever ago, sitting neatly under Shiro’s bed. Removing the pair he was currently wearing, he climbed up onto the large bed, putting himself against the wall for the first time.
Shiro sat down next to him, leaving a small amount of space between them, and picked up the data pad from his bed side table and began to read.
Lance was already feeling himself relax, the scent of Shiro and the soft mattress below him. Making a frustrated noise at the distance between them, he moved closer to the larger man. Without word, Shiro lifted his arm allowing Lance to slide under, tucked against his side. Lance rocked slightly with every breath Shiro took.
It seemed like only moments later Shiro was petting him awake.
“You’re going to have to tell me what you last remember happening in the book because I didn’t notice you falling asleep.” He smiled softly and ran his fingers through Lance’s hair.
Lance was struck then by the realization that he would be happy waking up like this every day.
With that thought in mind he moved swiftly, pulling himself up and swinging a leg over Shiro’s lap until he straddled the Black Paladin.
Shiro looked surprised as they stared into each other’s eyes and then his expression changed to one that Lance was unfamiliar with but suspected he wanted to see more often. Shiro’s hands moved to Lance’s hips as Lance’s hands moved to Shiro’s face, pushing the black framed glasses back into his hair.
They came together suddenly, Lance having more control of this kiss than their previous one. He used the height he had in this position to his advantage, controlling the movements of their mouths, licking into Shiro, caressing his tongue and teeth.
Shiro for his part used this opportunity to run his hands along Lance’s body, feeling the sleek swimmer’s muscles in his back, going lower to pet his rounded Omega hips, squeezing his soft ass.
Lance broke away to moan at that, giving Shiro the opportunity to bury his face in Lance’s neck. Releasing his bottom, he brought his hands up to guide the Omega down low enough that he could press his nose against his neck, sliding up to scent the gland behind his ear. He ran his tongue over it messily before biting down gently, releasing heady, aroused Omega pheromones.
Lance tossed his head and cried out, his arms wrapped loosely around Shiro’s shoulders as he tried to breathe through the onslaught. He ground his hips down without thought and couldn’t help the soft moan when he felt Shiro’s hard cock, straining up to press against him.
Shiro growled softly, a quiet aroused noise that brought Lance’s eyes and hands back to his face. They maintained eye contact as Shiro used the hands at his hips to roll Lance down against him. Lance bit his lip as he fought a moan, which Shiro made a face at, before pressing their mouths together again.
“Don’t hold back,” he panted. “I want to hear you.”
His words alone were enough for Lance to mewl helplessly, but the way Shiro rolled his hips up into him – his hands clutching Lance against them in the most amazing friction he’d ever experienced – had Lance moaning without pause.
“Yes,” Shiro panted, his eyes never leaving Lance’s. He was so enraptured by the Omega sitting in his lap, Lance had never felt so significant to anyone as he did in that moment. “I want to make you come, baby. Please, come for me, Lance.”
It was his name that did it. Hearing Shiro of all people call him baby was enough to have his asshole dripping, but the sound of his name then, whispered reverently, pushed Lance right over the edge.
“Shiro!” He shook with his orgasm, tears in his eyes that weren’t due to his unending depression for the first time in months.
It took Lance a second, so wrapped up in his own orgasm, to realize that Shiro was coming too. He clutched Lance’s hips to his lap so tightly as he rode it out, and he’d buried his face in Lance’s throat, a growl escaping his chest.
As suddenly as it had started, it was over.
Shiro fell back against the pillows, his grip on Lance bringing the Omega with him. He ran his hands up Lance’s back soothingly, and laughed a little when he said, “I haven’t come in my pants since flight school.”
Lance smiled and purred, content to ignore the cooling mess in his boxer briefs. He was coasting on the high on an amazing orgasm from the most attractive Alpha he’d ever set eyes on.
Who knew how long he would have stayed there, purring away while Shiro continued to pet him, if his belly hadn’t pressed down against Shiro’s hard stomach. It was the slightest give, not enough for Shiro to notice but enough that Lance instantly froze.
Shiro felt him tense immediately and asked, “Lance?”
“Uh, I- I have to go. I’m sorry.” Lance pushed himself off of Shiro and was out the door in seconds.
His only thought when he reached his rooms was that he was going to be out of shoes soon if this kept up.
Lance didn’t go to training the next day.
It was early afternoon and he had yet to leave his bed. His morning sickness was finally passing, and he was able to sleep in again. He’d read in that article that it was important he ate well during this point in the pregnancy, because he needed to start gaining more weight, but he was afraid to venture into the kitchen, running into Shiro not worth the risk.
He couldn’t stop thinking about the night before. Shiro’s hands on his hips, his moans and growls, the way he’d called him baby. Lance shivered at the memory.
So, he liked Shiro.
And Shiro liked him.
It should have been so easy.
Someone knocked on the door then and Lance looked up, alarmed, before calling, “What’s up?”
“Can I please come in?” It was Shiro.
Lance felt adrenaline flood his system and he knew his corned Omega scent was probably ratcheting up, filing the room with proof of his nerves. “Uhm, just a sec.”
Quickly he threw on a baggy sweatshirt to go with his sleep pants and moved to open the door.
Shiro stood there, in his training clothes, holding two pairs of Lance’s shoes.
“I brought you these,” he said by way of greeting. Lance took them with a nervous word of thanks and stepped back, allowing the Black Paladin to enter.
He looked around his room, trying to imagine the way Shiro was seeing it now. It was a little messy, but nowhere near Pidge’s disaster area. His walls were covered in knickknacks from all of the places they’d visited, and his closet overflowed with clothes, but otherwise it wasn’t anything to be ashamed of.
“Your room reeks of anxiety, Lance.” Or, never mind, maybe he did have cause to be ashamed. Lance walked around nervously, dropping his shoes in the closet, straightening items on his desk and moving clothes off his bed, as if organizing his things would somehow clear the air.
“Oh uhm, I’m sorry, I just-“ He started to flounder for an excuse but Shiro stopped him with a firm grip on his wrist.
“Lance,” he stepped closer to the Omega, right into his space. “Why are you always apologizing to me?”
This was not the question Lance expected and he pulled up short.
“Oh… I don’t…” Lance hesitated, avoiding Shiro’s piercing gaze by staring at the floor. “I guess because I don’t want you to be disappointed in me.” He huffed a laugh in an effort to clear the mood but Shiro pulled on his wrist, forcing Lance to look up.
“Why would I be disappointed in you?” The heart of the matter.
So many reasons.
“Lance, please tell me what is going on. I’m struggling to understand, and – after last night, I just-“
Lance cut him off, “Last night was a mistake.”
Hurt flashed in Shiro’s eyes but he still asked. “Do you really believe that?”
Lance tried to pull his wrist out of Shiro’s grasp, but the Alpha’s grip held strong. Panicking he felt his eyes begin to water, he’d never hated his stupid hormones so much as that moment. Instead of answering the question he said, “You don’t want me Shiro.” He pulled again, moisture spilling over.
Shiro let him go immediately, rocked by the appearance of Lance’s tears.
“You don’t understand,” Lance cried, pressing his hands against his own chest beseechingly. “You don’t want me.”
“Then help me understand Lance!” Shiro was beginning to feel the grip of panic as well, he wanted to grab Lance and shake him until the truth spilled out of him. “Why wouldn’t I want you?”
Lance’s hands moved to his face, trying to hide from Shiro’s piercing stare, and he only cried harder as he said, “I’m so stupid Shiro, you don’t want me, I’m so fucking stupid.” He took a deep breath and found he couldn’t draw in air. He tried again and choked, trying unsuccessfully to catch his breath. Hysteria began to set in as he continued to gasp for air, tears running into his open mouth, desperation burning in his lungs.
Suddenly he was sat on the edge of his bed, legs spread, and his head held between his knees by a firm grip on the back of his neck. The ringing in his ears he hadn’t even noticed until then began to dissipate as he was finally able to draw breath. He realized Shiro was talking to him.
“-aving a panic attack, just breath slow, in through your nose and out through your mouth, it’s okay Lance, you’re okay.” He ran his hand from the back of Lance’s neck, down his spine and up again, all the while whispering gentle instructions to relax. His thumb smoothed over Lance’s scent gland soothingly.
“I’m sor-“ But Shiro cut him off with a light squeeze to his neck. “I mean, thank you… “ He looked at Shiro then, “You figured that out quick,” he said, a question in his voice.
“You see them a lot in the Garrison. First time pilots, kids away from their family. I may also have had my share of them…” He smiled softly to Lance, his large hand still caressing the glands in his neck.
“There’s a lot I don’t know about you,” Lance said quietly, his eyes never leaving Shiro’s face.
Shiro did smile at that, “Well then at least we’re on an even playing field.”
Shiro stood up then, and without thinking Lance moved back on the bed, giving the larger man room to lie next to him, which Shiro did without comment.
They lay together on the narrow bed, not touching beyond their hands in the middle, looking at one another.
“Your bed smells nice,” Shiro told him, pressing his face deeper into the pillow.
Lance gave him an amused look despite everything, “I thought it smelled like anxiety.”
Shiro shrugged, “Nah, the air smells like anxiety. Your bed smells like you.”
“What do I smell like?” Lance had never asked his question of anyone, it always seemed too intimate.
Shiro raised an eyebrow and looked briefly down at Lance’s neck. “May I?”
Lance nodded, tipping his head down into the pillow, giving Shiro access to the source. The Alpha leaned forward, pressing his nose into Lance’s throat, taking short deep breaths, a rumbling chuffing noise in his chest. Lance felt his reply in his throat, a small chattering sound, pure pleased Omega.
Shiro pulled away with a thoughtful expression. “You smell like rain.” He hummed and continued, “Like that moment right before it rains, when it’s calm and expectant, and you know it’s about to pour.”
Lance blushed, shocked at the feeling behind Shiro’s words.
“Lately though you smell anxious, which is more chemical-y. Like astringent… or bleach.” Shiro shrugged.
“Oh…” Lance trailed off, his eyes drifting down to the hollow of Shiro’s throat, where his Alpha scent glands were. Shiro tracked his gaze, then tilted his head back, inviting.
Never one to waste an opportunity, Lance shifted forward, pressing his face under the Alpha’s chin. Breathing deeply, he tried to organize his thoughts to describe the scent.
He leaned back and looked up at Shiro’s face. “You smell… important.”
“That’s not a smell Lance,” Shiro laughed but Lance went on, waving him away.
“No like, ugh- This is hard to describe. It’s like… you know when you smell coffee?”
“I smell like coffee?” Shiro raised his eyebrow skeptically.
“No, it’s like the smell of it. You know how it makes you feel? Like, just the smell of coffee can change your mood? And it’s imperative that you have a cup, you need it. That warm longing.” He trailed off, looking embarrassed before confessing, “It kind of reminds me of my dad.”
Shiro groaned his laughter, burying his face into the pillows, muffling his voice when he said, “Oh God, you did not just compare me to your dad, Lance.”
Lance laughed and pulled Shiro up, trying to get him to stop hiding his face as he explained, “No it’s nice! Like, not in a weird way. My dad’s an Alpha too and his scent was always really comforting. I like it…”
Shiro let himself be pulled up out of the pillows, his eyes shining with laughter as he looked at Lance. “As long as you don’t call me Dad,” he said, with a roll of his eyes.
“But what if I called you Daddy?” He quipped, voice pitched lower as a joke, but the smile dropped from his face when he saw the way Shiro’s eyes dilated, his breathing heavier suddenly.
The tension in the room was back, tenfold. Shiro leaned up slightly then, and Lance automatically rolled onto his back to look up at him.
Lance tried to lighten the mood, “So Daddy does it for you, huh?” he joked, but Shiro didn’t smile. He seemed to be studying Lance, looking for something.
Finally, he asked, “Lance… Do you like me?” He looked as stoic as ever but there was vulnerability in his voice.
“Yes,” it was a whisper, the answer surprising Lance, who had planned to never say it aloud.
“Then what’s holding you back?”
It could have been the emotion in Shiro’s voice when he asked, or the way he’d comforted the Omega over the past week. Hell, the past few months, Lance thought briefly of the hug in the hallway before his heat. It could have been the way Lance felt so incredibly comfortable in the other man’s presence. Or it could have just been the fact that Lance had been harboring this massive secret that pervaded his every thought and was crushing him more and more each day. Lance wasn’t sure what made him do it, but he looked Shiro directly in the eyes as he whispered.
“I’m pregnant.”
Shiro sat up and back so fast Lance couldn’t track his movements. It didn’t matter anyway though because as soon as the words were out of his mouth he was crying, curling in on himself, pulling a pillow over to try and cover his face.
He couldn’t look at Shiro now, he couldn’t handle his disappointment.
Shiro sat perfectly still, trying to process the information until Lance’s distressed sobbing brought him back to himself.
“What?” He said, not the smartest remark he’d ever made, but the only word that he could pull from his mouth. He looked down at Lance and his obvious anguish at the confession turned Shiro’s shock into concern. He pulled at the pillow Lance was attempting to hide in, trying to ignore the way this made the Omega cry harder.
Finally, he got it, but Lance only moved to cover his face with his hands, the only word he could gasp out was, “Sorry.”
“Lance, please,” Shiro pulled at his hands, trying to get the smaller man to look at him but Lance kept his eyes squeezed shut, tears pooling under his eyelashes. “What… are you sure?”
Lanced nodded, his eyes still closed, his face red and wet. Shiro had not released his grip on the Omega’s hands and he could feel their trembling.
Shiro had never felt so out of depth, at a loss for words. “How?” It was all he could get out.
Lance finally opened his eyes, giving Shiro a dark look, as if the answer should be obvious.
Because it was.
“Keith.” At Shiro’s voice, Lance began to cry anew, pulling his hands from Shiro’s now slack grip, covering his face.
He rolled onto his side away from Shiro, his heart breaking at the thought that this new, wonderful thing developing between he and Shiro was over before it even started.
“I saw him during your heat though… He couldn’t have been with you. And you guys have been at each other’s throats for months! Even since then, it’s still so tense when you’re both in the room…” He seemed to be talking to himself before a growl escaped him and he turned the Omega back over, looming over him. “Did Keith… was this not consensual?”
“I…” Lance trailed off and Shiro’s eyes hardened, assuming the worst. He growled then in a way that Lance had never heard, angry and threatening. It made the Omega in him shake.
“I’ll kill him.”
Lance’s eyes widened at that statement, at the truth he heard in it, and he sat up suddenly, his hands on Shiro’s chest to push him back.
“No, it wasn’t like that!” He paused to organize his thoughts and Shiro watched him, apprehensive.
“I- fuck, it wasn’t Keith’s fault…” He took a deep breath and eyes fixed on his lap, spilled it all out.
“You saw what Keith was like leading up to my heat. He was so angry at me, I couldn’t even understand what was happening. Pidge suggested… Well she thought that maybe it was my scent, that Keith was aroused by it and he didn’t want to be. Either way, it was awful and instead of trying to talk to Keith about it and work things out I just hid from him, which looking back now I realize was a mistake because when my heat did start for real, Keith must have like, snapped or something.
“He showed up in the room where I was nesting and when he got there, I knew immediately he wasn’t right, it was like he was in this trance, his eyes were huge. I could have stopped him Shiro, but I didn’t, because you were right, I do like Keith. I did… I- fuck.” He covered his mouth with both hands, hoping to stem the verbal vomit.
When Shiro didn’t say anything, he went on, “It was only once and afterwards he left and then I don’t know, we never talked about it. Keith went back to how he always was, it was like it never happened! Like he doesn’t even remember. Honestly, the whole thing was so surreal I would have thought I dreamt it if I hadn’t gotten…”
Shiro moved down then, closer to Lance, and touched his hand to Lance’s shin. The physical contact brought Lance back enough to realize he was still crying, less violently, but steady.
“I’m so fucking tired of crying,” he said.
“Lance… baby,” Lance looked up at that, beyond surprised that Shiro would use a pet name, after everything he’d just heard but Shiro went on.
“I’m so sorry.” It was a role reversal, and Lance reeled back confused. “I told you I would keep you safe during your heat, I should have been more cautious, but I thought staying away from the lower levels was being cautious! I thought I was the one you had to worry about!”
“Shiro, this isn’t your fault, it’s mi-“ The Alpha cut him off quickly.
“It’s not Lance. This isn’t your fault, at all.” He grabbed Lance’s hands, pulling him until they were looking directly at each other. “Playing the blame game isn’t helpful but if you need to put it somewhere, put it on me. And put it on Keith. What he did was inexcusable.”
“But-“
“No Lance, listen to me. Keith has a lot of bottled up feelings that he needs to work on, I won’t pretend to understand why he acted the way he did leading up to your heat. But he broke your trust, and mine, by going down to the lower levels. We all knew you were there and why. He may have been clouded by your scent when you were around, but nothing you did forced him to go down there.”
Shiro leaned back with a noise of disgust, but continued, “Keith should have never gotten near enough to be affected by your heat scent. He knew better, I don’t know what the fuck he was thinking.”
Lance tried to process what Shiro was saying. It was true, Keith had gone out of his way to find Lance – must have headed to the lowest level and followed his scent. But it didn’t change the fact that Lance had let the Alpha have him. He may have been an Omega, but he wasn’t defenseless, he could have kicked Keith out, had considered it in fact, before giving into his own selfish desire.
“I didn’t stop him though,” he said. “I was so happy he was there, I thought… I don’t know what I thought.”
“Lance, you would have fucked anyone who walked into that room.” He pulled Lance even closer, “I’m sorry to put it so bluntly but that’s just how it is when an Omega is in heat. I’ve seen it, I know.”
He sighed, “The fact that you have feelings for Keith didn’t make the difference, it just makes the whole situation more painful now.”
He pushed Lance away gently, until the Omega whined.
“Please,” Lance didn’t know what he was asking for. “I don’t have feelings for Keith. I mean, I did, or I thought that I did… I don’t know, this whole thing is so confusing. I’m so confused.”
His hand dropped down to his stomach instinctively, which did not go unnoticed by Shiro.
“What are you going to do?” He asked, gesturing to where Lance’s baby grew. Lance’s baby. God dammit.
“I was planning to leave Voltron.”
Shiro looked up at that, his eyes widening, “What- Lance, what are you thinking?”
“I can’t raise a baby and save the universe Shiro! I don’t have a lot of options!”
Shiro paused, before saying, “So you want to keep it?”
Lance looked up, surprised, then back down to his stomach, where both hands rested.
He came from a large family. His mother had birthed a lot of kids, and his cousins and nieces and nephews were constantly all over the place. He’d always known that he would have a baby of his own one day. He hadn’t expected it to happen so soon or… under such circumstances, but he knew he wanted to be a mom.
Finding out he was pregnant was scary, there were a lot of unknowns and it had completely sidetracked all of the plans he’d made for the future. But it also felt so natural, like something he’d been missing was now found. It had never occurred to him to look into an abortion. He understood why Shiro would ask, and it wasn’t like he was opposed to the idea of abortions. It just wasn’t for him.
At first, he had thought he wanted to keep it simply because it was a part of Keith, probably the only part of Keith he would ever have, but as his pregnancy went on, he realized more and more that he wanted this baby because it was a part of him.
“Yeah,” he said, moving his hands softly over his stomach. “I… already love them.” He blushed furiously.
Shiro sighed, rubbing his hand over his mouth. “Okay,” he said, looking around the room before coming back to Lance. “Okay, we have to come up with a plan.”
Lance looked up suddenly, we? Shiro couldn’t possibly be…
“We have to tell the team,” he said, as if it was the most obvious first move.
“No!” Lance shouted, moving forward to grab Shiro, even though the Alpha had made no move to go. Shiro looked at him, surprised.
“Lance, how do you think you can keep this a secret?!”
“I have so far!” Shiro looked at him incredulously. “It’ll be awhile before I’m even showing enough for other people to notice, and once it gets there then I’ll leave. I have time to plan.”
“I’m not letting you leave,” Shiro’s voice took on a higher tone, “Are you insane, Lance? I wouldn’t let any pregnant Omega just waltz off into space, and I definitely won’t let you.”
“I’m not your responsibility Shiro, this isn’t your baby!”
Shiro sat back down, he hadn’t even realized he’d been raising up on his knees, as if hovering over Lance would force the Blue Paladin to see his point.
“You’re right. It’s not my baby. But you are my team member, and I won’t let you endanger yourself.” He paused for a moment, and then said, “My feelings for you haven’t changed. What I said before still stands. I’m here to help you, so let me help you.”
“Please don’t tell the team,” Lance said. “I… promise I won’t run off, but I’m not ready for everyone to know.”
“Nobody would judge you Lance. Everyone on this ship loves you.”
Like clockwork, Lance felt his eyes grow wet, and he lay back in the bed with a grimace.
“I’m so… fucking embarrassed.” He whispered, even his voice sounded wet with tears.
Shiro moved to lie next to him then, spooning up against the Omega, his hand pressed against Lance’s chest, face buried in his neck.
“Everyone is going to know how stupid I am,” he whispered, squeezing his eyes closed, pressing back into Shiro and relishing the warm comfort the Alpha was providing.
“No one is going to think you’re stupid, Lance.”
Lance didn’t agree with that statement in the least, but he kept his comments to himself. He rolled over in Shiro’s hold, until they were face to face.
“What could you possibly see in me that my being knocked up by another Alpha doesn’t scare you off?” He looked at Shiro, searching for some kind of answer.
Shiro looked considering. “This is honestly… really shocking. I won’t lie to you. But also, I’m a little relieved? Your behavior lately has been so worrisome, and when you wouldn’t just tell me outright, I started imagining all kinds of worst-case scenarios.”
He huffed a small laugh, “I never imagined this, of course.”
“This is definitely a worst-case scenario, Shiro.” His eyes shined with left over tears, which may have spilled over when Shiro pulled him in tight, tucking Lance’s face right up against his scent glands.
“No baby, this is definitely not the worst thing that could happen.”
Lance lay there, breathing in the soothing, protective Alpha pheromones until he fell asleep, clutching Shiro’s shirt.
When he woke up, he could tell a few hours had passed, his arm was numb from laying on it and his face felt puffy and gross from crying earlier. Shiro’s arm was still loosely wrapped around him and his chest rose and fell with his breath.
Why was Shiro so wonderful to Lance? What had he ever done to deserve it, beyond be a member of the Voltron team? And how had he been so ignorant to it over the years? Shiro was always so kind and thoughtful to him, but he was like that with everyone! So yeah, maybe Shiro’s hand found its way to Lance’s person more often than was necessary. And Shiro always complimented Lance, particularly when he was feeling down, almost as if Shiro didn’t like to see him unhappy.
But that was just normal Alpha stuff, right? How an Alpha treated an Omega in their pack. It was exactly how he’d always seen his dad treat his mom.
Oh Jesus Christ.
How had he been so blind?! Had he really been so wrapped up in Keith, and his stupid crush that he didn’t see the way Shiro looked at him? Spoke to him?
Shiro didn’t just like him.
Shiro was in love with him.
Lance felt himself grow dizzy, and a wave of nausea crashed over him. By now intimately familiar with the feeling, Lance practically vaulted over the sleeping Alpha and threw himself into the bathroom.
He was hunched over the bowl, retching so hard he thought he’d choke up an organ, when he felt a hand brush his back and the water bottle he kept by his bed being held out to him. With one last gagging cough, he leaned back and grabbed it, rinsing his mouth before spitting it into the bowl. He flushed the toilet, then moved to lean back against the wall.
Shiro was crouched next to him, concern in his eyes. “Have you been sick a lot?” He asked.
Lance nodded, “Yeah, it’s been getting better though. I think it’s finally going away.”
“I can’t believe you’ve managed to keep this a secret for so long, it’s been like…”
“Twelve weeks,” Lance supplied.
“Twelve weeks,” Shiro repeated, sinking down onto the floor next to Lance. “And you haven’t told anyone? Not even Hunk?”
“No.”
“Lance, everyone has been so worried about you. Your feelings when we form Voltron, they’re so… crushing, it’s like overwhelming melancholy.”
“Yeah well, I’m sad.” He made a self-deprecating face. “I was diagnosed with clinical depression years ago and it’s not like I’ve had access to any type of medication.”
Shiro looked over at him, “Why wouldn’t you tell someone? We can make medicine, Pidge could synthesize something-“
Lance cut him off, “It’s not something I love telling people. And honestly, with Voltron and everything we’ve been up to these past few years, it hasn’t been as noticeable as it used to be. I’d gone so long without a depressive period, I was starting to believe it was gone for good.”
“Things like that don’t go away,” Shiro spoke softly.
“I know,” Lance replied. “The worst part is that I’m so focused on being miserable, I barely have any energy to give thought to my pregnancy. I always thought that when I got knocked up I would be happy about it. I want to be happy about it.”
He paused and said, “I always thought I would be married, or at least bonded. I never thought… I never thought that the father of my child wouldn’t want me.”
Shiro grasped Lance’s hand, lacing their fingers together.
“Sleep in my room tonight,” Shiro said after a while. At Lance’s face he quickly went on, “Nothing serious, just – sleep, with me.”
So Lance followed Shiro back to his room, barefoot this time, clutching to the Alpha’s hand the entire way. Lance was mentally rehearsing excuses, in the event they ran into someone, but they reached the Alpha’s room without incident. When they arrived, it was like all the other nights Lance had spent in that room, Shiro reading aloud to him as they cuddled in bed. They were going to finish the book soon and the thought made him sad.
Lance slept there that night, and the night after that.
Sharing a space with Shiro was odd. The first morning Lance awoke to find the bed empty, his sleeping partner on a spongy mat on the ground, huffing for breath through rigorous crunches. His shirt was off, but he wore his work out shoes, and when he noticed Lance was awake and observing him, he stopped suddenly.
“Good morning,” he wasn’t even out of breath despite what was clearly a rigorous workout.
Lance watched the sweat skate down from his damp hairline, over his throat and down his chest. The smell of Alpha was cloying.
“Morning,” Lance replied, when his brain came back online. “Do you do this every day?”
Shiro nodded, crossing is arms over his bent knees, bringing his face closer to Lance’s.
“And then you still run the team ragged in the training room? Are you… okay?”
Shiro laughed, but didn’t say anything, only shrugged in response.
“Well, count me out. In fact, if you could cut me from all training that’d be great,” he rolled back onto the bed, burrowing into the covers as if to prove his laziness.
“Alright, you’re dismissed,” Shiro laughed. “No training, ever again.”
Lance sighed languidly with his eyes closed, “God, I knew dating you would have some perks.”
Shiro hummed, then said, “Is that what we’re doing? Dating?”
Lance looked over at Shiro, who was smiling that sweet smile Lance was coming to love.
“I mean… It’s not like we can do dinner and a movie. And I am pregnant. And you are my team captain…”
Shiro’s face was expectant as he listened to Lance tick off all the reasons this situation was a mess.
“But yeah, I think I’d call this dating.” Lance gave Shiro a flirty look to drive it home, and Shiro laughed.
How had he never noticed how nice Shiro’s laugh was?
“Well if we’re dating, I’m gonna kiss you. A lot.” Shiro said, matter-of-factly.
Lance blushed but nodded.
“And the team is gonna know. I’m not going to announce it at dinner or anything, but I’m not the sneaking around type when it comes to this stuff.” At his look, Lance nodded again.
“I’m okay with hiding the pregnancy, for now, but I want everyone to know you’re mine, Lance.”
Lance shivered at that, and for whatever reason, felt himself get wet. He prayed Shiro wouldn’t scent it.
“I’m going to shower. You should probably go get dressed.” He told Lance. “I’d really like it if you came to breakfast this morning.”
With that he leaned over, pressing a slightly sweaty kiss to Lance’s hairline, before walking into the bathroom.
Lance waited until the bathroom door closed before reaching down below the covers, into his sleep pants. He was soaking.
What the fuck, brain, Lance chastised himself.
He gathered his energy before leaving, sneaking down the hallway until he was at his own room. He showered quickly and was just finishing getting dressed when there was a knock at his door.
“Hey man, can I look for something?” It was Hunk’s voice. Despite himself, Lance looked around for incriminating evidence to hide, as if he had positive pregnancy tests or ultrasound photos lying everywhere.
Finding the room acceptable, he looked at his stomach. Fuck, he was going to start struggling to hide it soon. For now, though, the hastily thrown on sweater covered everything.
He opened the door, trying to look normal, “Hey, hi, what’s up?”
Distinctly not normal, Lance, pull it together.
“Do you still have that box of adapters, from when you were putting together the game system? Pidge said she thought she saw them in your room.”
Lance snapped his fingers, “Oh yeah, they’re right over here, hold on.” He reached under his desk where he had left them and turned back to Hunk.
It must have been the way he moved or how near they had to come to each other to pass over the box, but Hunk made a weird face and said, “Whoa dude, you reek of Shiro.”
“Wait, what?” He stepped back, “I don’t kno- I mean, I’m not-“
Thankfully Hunk cut in, “Dude it’s fine, it just surprised me at first. It’s really common for Omegas to smell like the Alphas they’re sleeping with.”
”What?!” Lance’s eye were huge, “What are you talking about? Are you seriously, do you hear yourself, I’m not-“
“Oh my God, Lance, why are you making this such a big deal?”
Lance stopped himself, trying to contain his verbal vomit. Think, Lance.
“Why would you think that Shiro and I are sleeping together?” He asked, trying to sound nonchalant.
Hunk didn’t buy it. “You’re never here when I come by in the evening,” he held up a finger, ready to start listing. “You’ve been super weird lately, like you’re keeping some big secret, Pidge saw you leave Shiro’s room in the middle of the night once.”
Lance gasped, he’d been so careful!
Hunk went on, three fingers aloft. “And of course, right now, you smell like you rolled around in a huge pile of Shiro. Not to mention Shiro has a giant crush on you, so it was only a matter of time.”
”You knew?!” Lance gasped even louder.
“Yeah man, everyone knows.” Understanding dawned on his face, “Wait, did you not know?”
”NO!” He threw his arms in the air.
“Oh man, classic Lance,” Hunk laughed, shaking his head. “Well everything worked out in the end, so ya know, all good.”
Lance was running his hands through his hair, berating himself. Everyone knew?! And he was the only one clueless? Did Keith know? Keith must know, he and Shiro were close. Holy shit, this was insane.
Hunk noticed his friend spiraling and grabbed his arm, “Dude, Lance, what’s up? Is everything not cool with you and Shiro?”
Lance pulled out of his thoughts, “No! No, everything is cool. I mean, we’re not sleeping together, well- we are sleeping together, in that I slept in his bed a few nights and the other day he napped in my-“
“Lance, you’re babbling.” Hunk always knew just how to pull Lance out of his rambling.
“Right, sorry,” he looked at Hunk full on. “Me and Shiro are… taking it slow.”
Hunk looked surprised at that. “That’s cool, I’m just glad you guys have figured it out. Me and Pidge were about to start placing bets.”
“I still can’t believe you didn’t tell me, so much for best friends!” Lance walked out of the room, Hunk trailing after him laughing.
Breakfast was normal. Coran regaled Hunk and Pidge with stories of old Altean monarchs, Lance cracked jokes, Allura and Shiro chatted about whatever it was Voltron leader’s talked about. Every once in a while, Shiro caught his eye and smiled that soft smile at him. No one even noticed. It was almost like Shiro had been smiling at him that way for years and Lance was the only one unaware.
Lance went to training and powered through. He noticed that Shiro didn’t suggest any hand-to-hand for him and he was grateful, if not a little nervous. If Shiro started treating him differently and having different expectations for him from the others, people would start to notice.
Everyone separated in the afternoon, Shiro heading to the bridge with Allura to look over battle strategies, Hunk and Pidge disappearing into the engineering room, already bickering over the best way to fix something.
Lance found himself alone and, for the first time in months, had no wish to be.
He wandered around the castle, considering heading back to the training room for some target practice – he’d mastered his rifle but had managed to unlock a much smaller handgun within his Bayard that he wanted to work with more – when he came across Coran in the med bay.
Lance hadn’t been in the med bay since the night he’d downloaded the week by week article on human pregnancy.
Coran was bustling around whistling, wiping down counter tops and taking stock of all the supplies they had, when he said, “Well come on, if you’re going to stare you might as well help!”
Lance startled at being caught but wandered in, grabbing the rag to wipe equipment.
“Everything okay, Lance? Not every day you volunteer to help with cleaning.” He stroked his moustache while eyeing the Blue Paladin.
Lance scoffed, “I didn’t volunteer, I was voluntold.” He rolled his eyes, before continuing, “I’m okay though.”
Coran hummed, “You’ve seemed a little off lately. Might I say, a little Blue?”
Lance huffed a laugh at the joke, “Jeez, I’m fine, just still homesick, I guess.”
The Altean nodded, “I can understand that sentiment.”
The way he said it made Lance’s heart ache for him, and with his hormones making him more emotional, he prayed he wouldn’t start crying. That would be totally suspicious, not to mention, Lance was so over crying.
They continued to work together in silence, and Lance started thinking about the medical equipment. There was probably something there that could scan his uterus, Alteans probably needed ultrasounds too, right? And what if there was something wrong with the baby? How would Lance know to fix it if I wasn’t aware in the first place.
There were a lot of things that could go wrong in a pregnancy. If Lance wanted to be a good mom, he needed to start now.
But he didn’t know anything about medicine. And even if he did, the Altean equipment was literally from another world. He had zero idea how to use any of it or read any of the results he might have gotten.
But there was someone who did.
Lance loved Coran. The Altean royal advisor had stepped into a father role for all of them, and he’d proven himself to be trustworthy and dependable, time and again. He’d always kind of felt like he and Coran had the best relationship, that Coran liked him the best of all the Paladins.
Of course, Coran often worked with Pidge and Hunk in the engineering room, but he and Lance had spent hundreds of hours performing menial tasks together, exchanging stories and laughing at each other’s bad jokes. Coran would never judge him.
“Hey Coran,” he said aloud, and the man jumped a tiny bit, startled.
“Yes, Lance?” He turned to look at the younger man.
“Did Alteans believe in Doctor-Patient confidentiality?” Lance tried to look uninterested, as if his question was out of curiosity. He failed, miserably.
“If you’re asking whether a medical professional would keep any diagnoses private when asked, then yes, they did.” He paused, then said, “If you’re asking me if I would keep any information you gave me secret, if you asked, the answer is of course, yes.”
“Even if you thought me keeping it a secret was a bad idea? Even if you thought I was endangering myself?” Lance had to be sure.
“Even then.” Coran promised. “Are you going to tell me what’s been bothering you, Blue?”
Lance looked around, walked over to the door and closed it, locking it to be sure. Coran looked unsurprised, remaining silent. Lance walked back over and leaned casually against a healing pod.
“I…” It was hard to get the words out, even though he’d already told the Black Paladin. With Shiro it was kind of an accident, more verbal vomit that Lance couldn’t keep in. He’d never said it out loud before that moment, and by saying to Shiro it was almost more real. Saying it now to Coran was far more difficult.
Coran was on the balls of his feet, his body language screaming for Lance to spit it out already, so he sighed and tried again.
“I’m… gonna have a baby.” He looked at Coran’s face and was surprised when he found not shock but understanding.
“I suspected that.” He said softly.
“Wait, really?” Did everyone one on this ship know everything about his life without telling him? “How did you know?”
“I recognized the symptoms – you were exhausted suddenly, and I heard you vomiting in the bathroom more than once. With the timeline from your heat, it just didn’t seem like a coincidence… Then of course I saw the past searches on the medical data pad.” Coran paused, while Lance internally chastised himself. What was he a thirteen-year-old looking up porn on the family computer? “I didn’t want to pressure you, but I’m so glad you’ve told me because now we can get you the medical attention you need.”
Lance was still trying to process the fact that Coran knew he was pregnant.
“So, wait,” he waved to the man, “Does Allura know? Did you tell anyone?”
“Of course not, and judging by your earlier questions, I can assume you’d like this to stay a secret still.” His face was so understanding it was making Lance weepy. “Does… the father know?”
“No.” He said it with possibly more force than was necessary. “But Shiro knows.”
That statement effectively narrowed down the possible father to one.
“Oh dear,” Coran said. The look he gave Lance said that he was more than aware of the tumultuous relationship he had with Keith.
“Yeah,” Lance shrugged as if it didn’t bother him, then said, “I don’t want anyone else to know. Obviously, it’s gonna become hard to hide eventually but until then… I’m not ready.”
“I won’t pressure you to do anything you’re not comfortable with, Lance.”
“Thanks, Coran. It means a lot to me.” He tried to look casual, but Coran stepped forward and hugged him firmly.
“You’re family, Lance.” He stepped back briskly, “Now! Let’s take a look at your little bundle of joy.”
Lance snorted but hopped up on the examination table. Coran pulled over what looked like a data pad but was clear in the middle. He instructed Lance to hold it over his midsection, while he began pressing buttons on the screen. His moustache shifted as he tried to decipher the readings, then he said, “Now I just switch this off to drown out your heartbeat and voila!” He tapped one more button and then Lance heard it.
It was soft, like the sound of blood rushing in your ears, or no – like the ocean. It sounded exactly like the surf coming in and pulling back out with the tide. Just a little bit faster.
“Baby looks very healthy, Lance.” Coran said, smiling at the monitor, handing Lance a tissue.
Lance hadn’t even realized he was crying. These days it was as second nature as breathing, he wasn’t surprised, but the difference with these tears is that they were happy.
He sniffed, wiping his face with the tissue.
“Thank you, Coran.”
“Anything, Blue. Anything you need.” He squeezed Lance’s knee, pulling the monitor away.
“Normally at this point in a pregnancy you’d only need a check-up every month or so, until much later, but as I’m not as familiar with human biology as Altean, I would recommend every two weeks. Just to be safe.”
“Sounds good.” Lance jumped off the table. He felt lighter, knowing that Coran knew, and that he had the medical support he needed.
After such an emotional conversation, Lance wanted to sleep. He started to walk to his room before he hesitated. He wanted a nap, and while he could probably get it in his own bed, what he really wanted was to laze in Shiro’s scent, and that could be found much stronger in the Alpha’s bed.
His feet carried him there before his brain could intervene.
He realized then that he’d never entered Shiro’s room without him there. He might not even be able to get in, Shiro probably kept it locked. But he pressed his hand to the pad on the wall and heard the whoosh of hydraulics as it opened.
He walked straight to the bed, shedding his sweater and shoes, climbing under the soft black duvet. God, Shiro’s bed was so much nicer than his. This was clear favoritism, he was going to bring it up with Allura ASAP because Lance wouldn’t stand for it. He planned out the conversation in his head until he fell asleep.
A hand was running through his hair, and Lance opened his eyes slowly to find Shiro looking down at him.
“We’ve got to stop meeting like this,” Lance said, turning slightly to smoosh his face into the pillow. Shiro laughed, his hair was wet, like he’d just gotten out of the shower.
“I brought you some food,” he gestured to the nightstand. “You missed dinner.”
“Wow, I slept forever.” He yawned, sitting up and taking the food from the tray, the blanket falling away from him.
Shiro’s eyes went down to his chest briefly and he blushed, looking back up quickly. He couldn’t believe it. Shiro was blushing. Why?
Lance looked down at himself. Oh. Right. This was probably the first time Shiro had seen him in something besides a baggy sweater in some time.
His stomach only slightly stretched his undershirt, but his chest was clearly more filled out than usual. Lance felt himself blushing then.
“I told Coran,” Lance said, changing the subject.
It was very effective. Shiro leaned forward as if shocked, “Really? That’s great Lance, I’m so happy to hear that.”
Lance tried to cut his excitement off, replying, “I needed a check-up, for the baby. I’m still not ready to tell anyone.”
“No, of course.” Shiro looked out of depth, an expression Lance hadn’t seen on Shiro’s face in all their years sharing a space until very recently. “I’m glad you told him though. Is everything… okay?” He gestured vaguely to Lance’s stomach.
“Yeah, uhm, I heard the heartbeat so that was kind of cool,” he downplayed, shoving the last bites of dinner in his mouth to avoid further speaking.
Shiro spread out on the blanket next to him, not climbing under, but laying by Lance’s side all the same. “I’ve never really been around a pregnant person,” he said.
“Really?” Lance put his empty dish back on the table and slid down slightly, to face Shiro more comfortably. “In my family, there’s always someone pregnant.” He rolled his eyes.
“You have a big family, right?” Shiro asked.
“Huge. Too huge. But it’s nice… I like having a lot of family around… A lot of noise.” He hummed thoughtfully and asked, “What about your family?”
“Not much to tell,” he said. “My mom died when I was young, I don’t really remember her that well.”
“Oh, that’s sad,” Lance said, unnecessarily, and reached his hand out from the blanket to touch Shiro’s face softly. “What about your dad?”
“We don’t get along,” Shiro didn’t seem upset by this. “He sent me to military school when I was really young, then I joined the Garrison. I probably spoke to him once a year at most.”
Lance couldn’t keep the forlorn expression off his face, despite his best efforts. Shiro spoke as if none of this bothered him, and Lance knew there was nothing worse than someone telling you what you should be feeling.
“Well you have us now,” he leaned forward and pressed his mouth full against the Alpha’s.
“I do,” Shiro replied, following Lance as he moved back, resuming the kiss. He moved to take it deeper, but the blanket caught between them held him back.
Lance pushed at it, making frustrated noises, suddenly desperate. He was getting wet again. Just from kissing! Normally Lance only got wet during his heat, any other time he remained dry despite his arousal. Was it the pregnancy?
Shiro quickly assisted, shoving the duvet to the foot of his bed, pushing Lance onto his back and moving over top of him to continue their kiss. Lance’s legs came up automatically, wrapping around the Alpha’s waist, Shiro pressing him even deeper to the mattress.
Shiro slid his organic hand underneath Lance’s shirt, dragging fingers up his back then down to his ass, squeezing lightly. Lance moaned into his kiss, his brain clouded by the thought how did Shiro get so good at this? when the Alpha moved his hand forward, caressing his side, skating up towards his stomach.
Lance froze.
Shiro pulled his head back, breaking the kiss. “Is this okay?”
“Uhm,” Lance hesitated, looking away, “I just, I’m not exactly-“
“I’m aware that you’re pregnant Lance,” Shiro said, not unkindly, moving back to sit on his heels as Lance moved up to his elbows.
“Yeah, but there’s a difference between just knowing and actually seeing.” Lance didn’t understand Shiro at all. The more he got to know him, the more confusing the older man seemed. How was he taking everything in stride like this? And what would it take to push him too far? To make him realize Lance really wasn’t worth it.
“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do,” Shiro offered, “but I’d really like to get you naked.”
Lance’s eyes widened, and his hole grew slicker. Fuuuuck. He nodded up at Shiro, who moved instantly, pushing him back, resuming their kiss. Lance whined in his throat, a noise he’d never made outside of heat, and Shiro growled in reply.
This time when Shiro moved to lift his shirt off, Lance let him, though his heart was racing. The Alpha ran firm hands up his sides, moving his mouth down to briefly kiss and lick Lance’s neck, before moving back to look at him.
Shiro’s eyes moved over him, taking stock of the pregnant Omega in his bed. Lance’s tummy was only somewhat rounded, hardly recognizable as that of the stomach of an expectant mother. But his chest though…
Shiro moved back to hover over Lance, who looked up at him nervously. “You’re very beautiful,” he said honestly.
Lance blushed, mortified despite himself. “Why do you always do that?!” He cried, startling Shiro, who looked at him questioningly. “Why do you always say embarrassing shit like that?”
Shiro raised an eyebrow, “What, like how I like you and find you attractive?”
“Yes!” Lance wailed, covering his eyes.
“You know I can literally smell how turned on you are?” He asked, moving down to cover Lance’s body with his own. Lance looked at him, startled at the confession. “I could smell the second you got wet.” He ran his mouth over Lance’s throat, moving lower. “I could smell you this morning too.”
Lance mewled, and Shiro continued to drop increasingly messier kisses down his chest, across his sensitive breasts. Shiro looked up then, making eye contact, “I think you like it when I say those things.” He flicked his tongue over Lance’s nipple before lowering his mouth fully to suck it in.
Lance cried out, his hands coming up to Shiro’s shoulders, head thrown back. Shiro sucked harder, biting with his teeth then laving with his tongue flat.
“Fuck! Fuckfuckfuck,” Lance babbled unthinkingly, throwing an arm over his eyes.
Shiro pulled back, and his fingers immediately moved to replace his mouth, pinching slightly. “Sensitive?” He asked.
“Very,” Lance replied, not looking at him.
“Good or bad?” Shiro asked, though his face said he knew the answer, and when Lance replied, “So good,” he moved his mouth immediately to the other nipple.
Once Lance was moaning incoherently, the smell of his slick hanging in the air, Shiro pulled off, kissing just beneath the nipple, then biting – sucking the flesh into his mouth until the blood capillaries broke. He did this again, relishing in the way Lance was squirming underneath him, unconsciously pushing his erection up against Shiro’s stomach, seeking friction. He marked Lance again and again before pulling back to view his work.
His small tits were littered with hickeys, and Shiro couldn’t stop the pleased rumbling noise that started in his chest. Lance sat up then, looked Shiro directly in the eyes and then was scrambling, pushing the Alpha off of him and backwards.
Shiro found himself on his back, Lance between his legs, pulling on his sweat pants. He lifted his hips up to give the Omega room to maneuver them off, pulling his feet out helpfully. When he was finally naked from the waist down, Lance wasted no time, picking up his heavy cock and licking wetly across the tip.
Lance for his part was reeling. He was on his knees, holding Takashi Shirogane’s dick – or most of it, since his fingers couldn’t touch when wrapped around it – about to suck him off. He’d dreamt about this once before, at the Garrison. Woken up hard and panting, before shoving his hand into his pants to finish himself off. And now here he was.
Holy shit.
He gripped the base, and ran his tongue along the frenulum, allowing the saliva in his mouth to spill over until everything was wet enough for him to plunge his mouth down, stroking the part he couldn’t reach.
Shiro reached his hand out, clutching at Lance’s hair, and the Omega looked up then, his mouth full as he pulled up, hollowing his cheeks.
Shiro looked wrecked, Lance noted with glee. His chest was heaving with deep breaths and his pupils were blown wide. He looked like he couldn’t believe what was happening. He looked like a man who was getting something he’d wanted for a long, long time.
I’ll make sure it was worth the wait.
Braced on one arm, Lance moved the hand that had been stroking Shiro, now slicked with drool, down further, cupping his balls before squeezing gently. His mouth moved lower on the shaft, before pulling up – applying pressure with his tongue – then dropping back down, this time not stopping until his lips touched the base.
“Lance, baby, oh my God,” Shiro moaned, his hand never leaving Lance’s hair.
Lance smiled around his mouthful before pulling back and repeating the action until his throat grew too sore. It was okay though, deep throating felt good and looked hot as hell, but it wasn’t going to get the job done. And Lance wanted nothing more than to swallow down his Alpha’s load.
His Alpha. He moaned at the thought, the vibration only adding to Shiro’s pleasure.
He pulled back, sucking wetly at the head, his hand stroking rhythmically until he felt the cock in his mouth harden even more, the balls he was still massaging drawing up and Shiro’s grip on his hair tightening almost painfully.
”Fuck, I’m gonna-“ Shiro grit out between clenched teeth.
Lance nodded and hummed an affirmative noise, his eyes closed in obvious contentment, and Shiro tipped over. Hot, salty jizz filled Lance’s mouth faster than he could have imagined, it was so thick as it hit the back of his throat that he choked slightly, coughing and pulled back to swallow. Shiro wasn’t finished though and one last shot hit him right in the face, only just missing his eye.
Shiro looked at the Omega still holding his softening cock, his right eye squinted and tongue poking out to lick at the come on his face. He shook with laughter, sitting up to whip off his own black shirt, pulling Lance into his lap to wipe his face off.
“It’s really great for my self-esteem when I blow a guy and he starts laughing,” Lance said with an exasperated look, which only made Shiro laugh more, pulling him into a tight hug.
“Sorry,” he sounded breathless, but happy. “Nervous energy, endorphins? I dunno.”
He pulled away to look at Lance and say, “Why are you so good at that?”
Lance shrugged but he blushed, “I had a friend, back home. Just screwing around, nothing serious.”
“I’d like to call that friend and thank him,” Shiro said, face completely serious and Lance shoved him away with a laugh.
Shiro pushed him gently off his lap, and Lance moved back to give him room. It also gave him a chance to look at Shiro in full. Really appreciate his nudity.
Shiro was like a Greek statute, it was ridiculous. It would have made him self-conscious if it weren’t for the fact that he’d so obviously just rocked Shiro’s world. He preened slightly at the thought and then ask suddenly, “Have you ever thought about this?”
Shiro paused, leaning over Lance, fingers hooked in the top of his jeans. He blushed slightly – which Lance found incredibly endearing, he’d just come on Lance’s face and here he was blushing at a question – and asked, “Us… in bed?”
“Yeah, or me sucking you off or just, I dunno, anything?”
“Yes.” He didn’t volunteer anything else.
Lance had assumed the answer was yes, Shiro admitted to liking Lance for years, and they were trapped on a tiny – relatively – ship, so it stood to reason fantasies were to be had.
Hearing him say it out loud though did something to his stomach, flipping it nervously. Shiro was still looking at him, some emotion Lance couldn’t name in his eyes, his fingers still hooked into his waistband.
“What did you think about?” He asked, curiosity getting the better of him.
Shiro shrugged but answered, “Oh, a lot of things. Kissing you…” he started to tug on the soft denims, lifting Lance up gently with his other hand.
“Sucking you,” he kept his eyes on his task, pulling the pants completely off, then moving to his boxer briefs, which were sticking to him with slick.
“Licking you,” Shiro went on, and Lance moaned at that. Shiro’s eyes flicked up to him then as he pulled the underwear free.
Lance moved to lay back as Shiro pushed his knees up and apart, putting him on display. His small cock was leaking against his stomach, and his hole was soaked, shiny with slick. Shiro’s eyes roved over him, taking it all in, before diving forward, licking his tongue from his asshole to his dick.
Lance’s shout was probably heard outside. It was probably heard down the hall, it echoed in the room so loudly.
Shiro pulled back, and began licking at the Omega’s thighs, licking away every inch of slick that covered him. He took his time, using broad strokes of his tongue, cleaning him like a cat – Lance wanted to cry it was so good. Shiro moved back to his hole and Lance did cry out then, his hands moving to Shiro’s hair, gripping the white strands in front to guide him deeper.
Lance’s thighs were shaking, and Shiro took this for the warning to was, pulling up suddenly to swallow down the Omega’s cock and plunging two fingers deep into his ass to draw out the orgasm.
Lance’s ears were ringing, like he’d spent too much time on the rifle range, and Shiro was looking down at him, expression managing to pull off pride and concern at the same time.
“…did I blackout?” He asked, amazed that his mouth could form the words, he felt so boneless.
“You blacked out,” Shiro said, the concern passing and only pride remaining. “Only for a few seconds though.”
“Oh, is that all?” He moved slightly then, giving Shiro the chance to lay down, before relaxing back against him. “We should have been doing this for like, years.”
Shiro huffed a laugh, “You’re telling me.”
+
The next few weeks went much the same. Lance stayed in Shiro’s room every night, and slowly his things managed to trickle over from his own room. It happened so gradually that it wasn’t until Lance was looking for a jacket in his own closet before remembering it was currently hanging in Shiro’s closet that he even was aware it was happening.
It became obvious to the team very quickly that Shiro and Lance were now a thing. Even without the fact that they were so obviously sharing a bed, Shiro’s behavior was a dead giveaway.
Lance was coming to realize that Shiro had been seriously holding himself back over the years, and that the past times when he’d graze Lance’s lower back or clasp his shoulder had been slip-ups on the Alpha’s part. Now there was barely a time when Shiro wasn’t touching Lance, his hand grazing his wrist, an arm casually slung over his shoulder as they sat in the lounge area, fingers on the back of his neck.
Lance wanted to be embarrassed but he just felt so fucking happy over the whole thing. The Omega part of him was in bliss at the attention from Shiro, and he was constantly fighting the urge to purr. And honestly, it wasn’t like anyone was making a big enough deal about it to be embarrassed.
Shiro and Lance had been alone in the kitchen one morning, talking and laughing as they prepared the coffee facsimile, wrapped up in the euphoric feeling of seclusion that only two people falling in love can share. Shiro had looped an arm around Lance’s waist, using his free hand to tilt the Omega’s head backward, dropping a kiss to his smiling mouth.
Pidge had walked into the kitchen, grabbed a cup of coffee, thrown the words “About time” over her shoulder before walking to sit down at the table. Lance had blushed heavily and Shiro merely kissed him again.
As the head of Voltron, Shiro remained commanding and authoritative, a stark contrast to the man Lance was sharing a bed with – someone who was always laughing and cuddling and getting him off. The more he got to know him though, the more Lance began to realize the fearless leader identity was only a small facet of Shiro.
He learned something else fairly quickly too. Shiro had nightmares.
Not every night but a few times Lance was awakened by the sudden movement of his bed partner, soft grunts accompanied with twitching muscles and rapid movement beneath his eyelids. The first time it happened Lance sat up, not sure what to do, reaching over gently to press his hand to Shiro’s chest.
“Shiro?” It was barely a whisper, but it was enough for Shiro’s eyes to snap open, both hands coming up to clutch the one on his chest, his breathing heavy as he frantically looked around before making eye contact with Lance.
“Oh,” he deflated, squeezing his eyes closed, his body untensing. “Sorry, I-“
“It’s okay,” Lance moved up the bed, resting on his elbow as he ran his fingers through Shiro’s hair. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“Not really,” Shiro’s breathing was regulating back to normal, his eyes still closed. “Just, old shit… I didn’t mean to wake you up.”
Lance hummed, settling back down, pressing himself against Shiro reassuringly. It was actually kind of nice, being able to reassure Shiro in some way, even if only physically.
Lance was slowly getting bigger. Unnoticeable in his Paladin armor or loose clothing, but his tee shirts stretched obviously.
He was also getting friskier.
During his last check up, Coran had, embarrassingly and without being asked, told him this was normal at this point in his pregnancy.
It seemed weird that having a baby inside him would make him want to have sex so bad, wasn’t that the point of sex in the first place? To achieve what had already happened?
Lance was just happy he’d stopped crying at every turn.
He suspected that had less to do with his hormones however, and more to do with the obvious adoration from Shiro.
Lance held his Bayard in front of him, the hand gun it was currently formed to warm from his grasp. He focused on the target in front of him, gently squeezing the trigger, trying to ignore the feeling of warm slick trickling out of him.
When he missed the center of the target by a fraction of an inch, he huffed and rolled his eyes, letting his Bayard deactivate.
It was impossible to concentrate when all he could think about was his dripping asshole. He moved to walk towards the training room showers before remembering it was absolutely not an option. He flushed at his near mistake, before turning around, heading towards Shiro’s room.
Their room?
His life was so bizarre now.
The shower was running when he entered the room giving Lance pause. Shiro was in there. Naked. Wet. Willing.
Lance was undressed before he even realized what he was doing, pressing the panel to open the bathroom door. Shiro looked up at the noise and upon seeing Lance, smiled.
That sweet smile. It was so fucking beautiful it hurt Lance. He paused, pressing his hand to his chest, rocked by the sudden onslaught of emotion. He felt dizzy with desire for the man in front of him.
The man who was now giving him an odd look, asking, “Okay?”
Lance snapped out of it, nodding he stepped into the shower, winding his arms around Shiro and pressing his face into his chest.
Shiro spun them around lightly, directing Lance’s head under the water, using his hands to tilt the Omega’s head under the stream. He spun them again, grabbing shampoo from the shelf in the corner, pouring it into Lance’s hair and working it into a froth with his fingers.
“Are you giving me a shampoo mohawk?” Lance asked, arms still wrapped around Shiro’s middle.
“No,” Shiro lied, twisting the chocolatey brown locks into liberty spikes.
“Uh huh,” Lance licked across Shiro’s nipple, and Shiro gasped, squirming away.
Oh really…? Lance did it again on the other side, and Shiro shook lightly. Wait… there was no way…
He pulled his arms forward, grazing his fingers over the Alpha’s side softly and Shiro’s arms came down so fast Lance barely saw it, a slight squeal escaping his throat.
“Oh my God!” Lance forced his hands back under Shiro’s arms, running his fingers down his ribs, and forward over his hips, towards his cock, stopping just before it turned sexual.
Shiro giggled.
“You’re ticklish!” Lance screeched, giddy with this newfound knowledge.
Shiro tried to pulled away, breathless, giggling, as he said, “No one will ever believe you!”
Lance paused, struck by how true that statement was. So unfair.
“They will if I tickle you in front of them,” he said slyly, still on the attack.
“You wouldn’t,” Shiro dodged, trying to avoid Lance’s searching hands while also not letting them slip to their death.
“Won’t I?” He challenged, giving up his tickling in favor of running his flat palms along Shiro’s stomach and hips. “When you least expect it – expect it.”
Shiro rolled his eyes, dipping Lance back under the water to rinse the soap from his now lopsided mohawk. Lance continued petting him, moving both hands back to cup Shiro’s firm butt cheeks.
“This is a gift to Omegas everywhere,” Lance sighed. “Actually, people in general.”
Shiro tightened the muscles of his thighs and ass, and Lance huffed out “Show off,” before sliding his palms back around to grasp Shiro’s rapidly hardening cock.
The playful atmosphere in the shower shifted, as Lance wrapped both hands around the shaft and pulled firmly. Shiro moaned low in his throat, moving his hands up to brace against the wall on either side of Lance’s head. He leaned down, pressing their mouths together, warm water running down into their kiss.
He brought one hand down to Lance’s neck, sweeping it slowly down the Omega’s body, gripping his soft, round bottom. Lance moaned into the kiss and Shiro dipped his hand lower, brushing his fingers over the soft, slick opening. He broke the kiss, moving to mouth at Lance’s neck, kissing his way up to his Omega gland, sucking firmly, scraping his teeth slightly in a suggestion of a Bond Bite.
Lance moaned, reaching up to clutch as Shiro’s shoulders, begging, “Please!”
“Please, what?” He continued to softly bite over the gland, saturating the small bathroom with the scent of aroused Omega.
“Please fuck me,” he breathed in Shiro’s ear.
He pulled back, looking Lance directly in the eye. “Are you sure?”
Lance and Shiro had been sharing a bed for almost three weeks and had made use of every opportunity to lick and suck and stroke each other to completion. But Lance had yet to suggest penetration, and Shiro was wary of pushing Lance to do anything the Omega didn’t want to.
Lance nodded, his cheeks faintly pink. “If you want to,” he said, suddenly overwhelmed with nerves.
Shiro growled, reaching back to shut the water off, then running his hands down Lance’s thighs in warning before lifting him up. Lance grabbed his shoulders in surprise, then wrapped his legs around Shiro’s waist, his small tummy squished into hard muscle.
They fell back into kissing immediately, as Shiro walked them to the bedroom, ignored towels still in the bathroom. He laid Lance down on the bed softly, hovering over him on his hands, eyes roving over his body.
“How would you like…?” Shiro questioned, and Lance had a moment of uncertainty. On his back, his stomach would be obvious, and despite Shiro’s obvious attraction to him, he was still self-conscious about the way his pregnancy was changing his body.
But on his hands and knees, it was too much like the last time. His first time. He squeezed his eyes to push the memory away and jumped slightly when Shiro touched his face tenderly.
“Hey, look at me,” Lance opened his eyes to find Shiro still above him. “We don’t have to do this, baby.”
“No,” Lance sighed, relaxing muscles he hadn’t even realized he’d tensed. “I really want this, Shiro.” He turned his face into the hand still cupping his cheek. “I’ve just… only done it once before, and it didn’t turn out so well.” He tried to laugh it off.
“That was…? Oh, Lance, sweetheart,” he ran his fingers through Lance’s wet hair softly, before making a decision, moving to lay back on the bed and bringing Lance up to straddle his hips.
Lance looked surprised to find himself on top so suddenly.
“Is this better?” Shiro asked, running his hands up Lance’s thighs before moving back to cup his ass.
“Yeah,” Lance’s eyes were taking in the view below him, before pushing his hips back slightly to feel the erection behind him. “Yeah, this is good.”
He moved his hands across Shiro’s chest, grazing his sides, smiling when the Alpha squirmed. He bent down, bringing himself face to face with the hollow of Shiro’s throat, licking across the gland.
Shiro used this opportunity to sink his fingers into Lance’s wet hole, driving the Omega to cry out. He wasn’t in heat, wouldn’t be again for quite some time, and as such should have been tight and in need of lube. But the pregnancy hormones were potent, and he was so loose he hardly required stretching, Shiro’s three fingers met almost no resistance.
Lance moved back quickly, reaching behind himself to grasp Shiro and position him at his entrance, his other hand bracing on the hard chest below. He began to push down quickly, when Shiro’s hands came up to grasp his thighs, “Easy, easy, love, go slow,” and other comforting platitudes spilling from the Alpha.
Lance released the breath he was holding and willed his body to relax, allowing Shiro to slip inside him easily. When he bottomed out, he was panting, his thighs trembling from the strain. He looked down at Shiro who was staring up at him, the picture of pleased, possessive Alpha. Lance couldn’t help the high, breathy noise that escaped him, overwhelmed by the intensity of Shiro’s gaze. In an effort to distract himself, he placed his hands on the Alpha’s chest for leverage and pushed his hips up slightly, before dropping them back down at the same excruciatingly slow pace.
”Fuck,” Lance huffed, his back arching at the feeling of Shiro’s cock, touching somewhere deep inside him. “You’re really big.”
Shiro smiled, placing his hands on Lance’s hips to help guide him into a gentle rolling pace, “You can take it.”
Lance looked up, surprised at Shiro’s words, and the Alpha went on, “You were made to take my cock.”
“Oh!” Lance shuddered at that, at the growling timber of Shiro’s voice, the way he could feel it under his hands.
They continued at this comfortable pace for a bit, Lance allowing himself the chance to become familiar with the feeling of a huge cock in his ass. It was slightly odd, but he had to admit, Shiro was right. He was made to take it. His body had grabbed the reins, like it knew exactly what to do.
Shiro was thrusting up slightly, using Lance’s slow pace to his advantage by running his hands all over the Omega, pressing his thumbs into sensitive nipples, brushing his fingers over the scent gland behind his ear – which made Lance moan loudly, he noted for later.
Finally, Lance leaned forward, his hands slipping in Shiro’s sweat, bringing their faces close enough to exchange sloppy, wet kisses. He pulled back up to a sitting pose, but his thighs were burning, the trembling constant.
“Fuck,” he laughed, “I like this position but it’s a lot of work.”
Shiro grinned up at him, his sharp canines catching on his full bottom lip. “Ready for me to take over?”
Lance didn’t have to think, his head nodding as he tilted it backwards, even his neck too tired to support anything.
Shiro didn’t have to be told twice, having been holding himself back from flipping them both and pounding into the warm, velvety hole gripping his dick so tightly. He bent his knees up to support Lance’s back, his feet flat on the bed, while his hands moved to Lance’s waist, before thrusting his hips up suddenly.
“Ah!” All of the air left Lance’s lungs in one breath, his hands coming up to grab Shiro’s thighs in surprise. He tried to close his mouth, but it was impossible with the intense pace Shiro set, so he settled for shoving his fingers in his mouth to cover the near constant moaning.
Shiro snatched his hand out of his mouth so fast, Lance couldn’t stop the drool that spilled out. “Lemme hear your voice,” he growled. “I love your voice.”
Oh God, was Shiro trying to kill Lance? Because that is what was happening, Lance was going to die. Fucked to death. A good way to go, all things considered.
Without the gag, the room was filled with the sounds of Lance’s wailing, a staccato beat set by Shiro’s rough thrusts and low, growled out encouragements.
They were beginning to lose rhythm as Shiro moved closer to the edge, when Lance felt it.
Shiro’s knot.
He gasped when it pressed up against his hole, “Is that…?” he trailed off.
Shiro slowed, pushing his knot up against Lance gently. “Yeah,” he shuddered at the sensation of warmth at the most sensitive part of him. “I don’t have to-“
“I thought that only happened when I’m in heat? Like the heat scent triggers it?” Lance was still moving his hips slowly up and down.
“Generally,” Shiro was panting, his hands like vices on Lance’s hips, “but, uh-“ he squeezed his eyes closed, “sometimes it happens.”
Lance was slowly working himself lower, taking the knot just a little bit more with each pass, never going over the widest part, like Shiro was so clearly desperate for.
“Sometimes,” Shiro grit out, “if I really like someone, that’s all it takes. But you don’t nee-“ his words were cut off by Lance dropping his weight suddenly, swallowing his knot. He pulled Lance to him then, rolling them over, grinding his hips into him – riding out his orgasm.
The second Lance’s back hit the mattress, he was coming, his fingers wrapped around Shiro’s shoulders, nails breaking skin.
It took him a moment to come back to himself, Shiro still above him, holding most of his weight on his elbows, face buried in his neck.
“Holy shit,” Lance sighed, wiggling slightly to pull at the place they were tied. Shiro grunted at the movement, pulling up to look him in the eyes.
“Holy shit,” he agreed.
Maybe it was the endorphins, maybe it was the fact that Shiro cursing was still so odd to him, or maybe it was the unbelievable fact that he was currented knotted to Takashi fucking Shirogane! Whatever the reason, Lance started giggling.
Shiro looked surprised by the noise, then smiled at Lance, burying his face back in his neck while the Omega laughed off the energy coursing through him.
+
Lance was eighteen weeks pregnant the first time he felt the baby move. He’d been experiencing odd twinges from his stomach for a while, but he’d been able to attribute it to his stomach gurgling or gas. The pregnancy article said some people didn’t feel movement until twenty-five weeks, and his little pomegranate sized baby had seemed on track with those expectations, so Lance was quite surprised when it happened.
They were lying in bed, as Lance so often found himself in the evenings now, with Shiro reading aloud. Lance was so happy they’d continued the ritual, he loved listening to Shiro’s steady, deep voice, and it gave him plenty of opportunity to touch and kiss Shiro without scrutiny.
They were halfway through Misery, Annie minutes away from cutting off Paul’s foot and cauterizing it with a blow torch, when Lance sat up suddenly, startling Shiro.
“It moved,” he gasped, looking to Shiro, his hands pressed firmly to his rapidly growing belly. “Like, I felt it under my hand.”
Shiro looked nervously at his stomach then back up to Lance’s face, “Can I…?” but Lance was already grabbing his hand, pressing it to his lower abdomen. They both waited, holding their breath in anticipation for the soft pressure Shiro felt suddenly.
“Oh,” Shiro said, “Wow. There’s… a baby in you.” He made no move to remove his hand, but the way he said it gave Lance pause.
“This whole time,” Lance told him, gentle but matter of fact.
“No, I know,” Shiro looked up at him, and then back down to his stomach. “I guess it’s just easy for me to forget sometimes. I know that’s probably… not good but,” he paused.
“No, I get it. Sometimes I even forget.” Lance pulled his hand away then, lacing their fingers, tugging until Shiro looked up at him. “Shiro… I understand if this is too weird for you…”
“I…” Shiro looked off before huffing and turning back to say, “Honestly, no, this isn’t how I wanted us to get together. But you getting pregnant… It’s really the only reason you started coming around, right? You needed the scent of an Alpha?”
Lance’s expression was abashed, but he nodded.
“So, I can’t help feeling glad it happened.” He stopped, and seemed to consider his words before saying, “That didn’t come out right.”
Lance moved to his knees, shuffling forward to straddle Shiro’s lap and push the Alpha against the wall.
“What’s going to happen when I have this baby?” He asked, afraid of the answer but desperate to know.
“We should probably baby-proof some stuff?” Shiro asked, then laughed, pulling Lance closer, squishing his stomach between them.
Lance smiled, but persisted, “No, what happens with us?” His dropped a kiss to the scar on Shiro’s nose.
“I’ll be here, Lance. I’m not going anywhere.” He kissed fully Lance then.
“Why?” Lance knew, but he needed to hear it.
“I’m in love with you.” It was said with zero hesitation, voice firm.
Knowing and hearing were two different things, and it was still shocking to have Shiro say so. “This is crazy – you realize that, right? You understand what you’re suggesting here?” Lance’s voice was growing hysterical, “I’m having another man’s baby, how are you okay with that? You shouldn’t be okay with that!”
“What do you want me to tell you, Lance?” There was that exasperation Lance had been waiting for. “Do you want me to be upset? Do you want me to tell you that it’s killing me that you’re having a baby that isn’t mine?”
Lance’s eyes widened. “Because it is, it’s killing me, I wish I could change it, but I can’t. I know better than anyone life doesn’t always turn out how we expect it, sometimes you have to just roll with things.”
It was the closest Shiro had ever come to shouting at him and Lance felt awful for bringing it out of him.
“I wish it was yours,” Lance whispered the thought that had been plaguing him for weeks, that was constantly in his head every time Shiro held him, kissed him, looked at him. Why couldn’t it be Shiro’s baby?!
“Me too,” Shiro replied, already unwinding from his brief outburst.
Lance took Shiro’s face between his hands and pressed their foreheads together lightly. “You’re way too good of a person for me.” Shiro snorted, tilting his face up until their mouths touched.
Lance wanted to tell Shiro that he loved him back. But he was beginning to think he didn’t have a firm grasp on the concept of romantic love.
It was so different from how he’d felt with Keith. With the Red Paladin it was burning – a constant ache in his chest, always pushing the other man in an effort to get him to lash out, to turn his attention to Lance, if only for a moment. It hurt knowing Keith was so close and yet so untouchable. So uninterested in Lance.
Love was painful, right? That’s what he’d read in books and watched on telenovelas with his grandmother.
But when Lance looked back on the handful of weeks he’d spent with Shiro, it was mostly them laughing together. They moved throughout their life, the same as they always had, but together. It made Lance look forward to his day more. Even boring, mundane shit like brushing their teeth at night before bed was engaging. It made the melancholy that always sat at the back of his mind more manageable. It was still there, but for some reason it didn’t feel as threatening to Lance as it always had.
It was like they were friends, best friends – who had really great sex and told each other all the tedious details of their day before they fell asleep. Was that love?
He put all the feelings he didn’t have the right words for into their kiss.
Lance was beginning to realize he couldn’t picture his future without Shiro in it. He had a hard time visualizing his child, or himself as a parent. Maybe because the baby was such an abstract concept to him still. Whatever the reason, when Lance tried to envision his future, he never saw his son or daughter. But he did see Shiro. Going through life, day to day, sharing adventures, laughing.
That conversation seemed to be a turning point in their relationship. Where before they had avoided talking about Lance’s pregnancy, now it was frequently a topic of conversation.
“Are you going to find out if it’s a girl or boy?” Shiro asked him one night, as they prepared to sleep, changing into more comfortable clothes.
Lance was currently enjoying his new-found ability to ogle Shiro as much as he wanted, and had to tear his eyes away from Shiro’s bare stomach to look up and say, “Uhm, what?”
Shiro smiled at him and repeated his question.
“Oh, I don’t know… I hadn’t really thought about it.”
“Well, what do you hope it is?”
Lance considered, “I hadn’t given it much thought honestly. I was more worried about just hiding it.”
Shiro rolled his eyes, “That’s an issue for another day. Have you thought about names?”
“Oh my God, no,” Lance sat down on the bed, looking alarmed, “That’s probably something I should be thinking about, right?”
Shiro laughed and pushed Lance flat, moving to straddle his thighs, as if to highlight Lance’s round belly. “It is kind of important.”
He placed his hand against the Omega’s stomach, pushing gently to feel the baby inside move. They were going to have to come up with a game plan to tell the team soon, Lance was getting bigger every day. The Paladin armor could only hide so much and soon Lance would be too pregnant to pilot his Lion.
“Lance Jr. if it’s a boy and Lancita if it’s a girl.” Lance had his hands on Shiro’s thighs, grinning up at him.
“No way in hell,” Shiro deadpanned and Lance laughed loudly.
“I dunno,” Lance shrugged, “I feel like I need to meet them first, you know? I can’t just pick out some random name, what if it doesn’t fit?”
A few days after that Shiro said to him, “That pregnancy article of yours says babies in utero can hear voices by this point, and that you can talk to them.”
“Yeah, my sister did that with her baby a lot. Used to put headphones on her stomach and play music,” Lance said.
“Music can help with mental development,” Shiro threw in, suddenly an expert in child rearing after reading one article.
“Yeah but I think they mean like Mozart and stuff, not J Balvin and Daddy Yankee,” Lance rolled his eyes.
“Do you ever talk to them? The baby?” Shiro asked.
“Uhm, sometimes,” Lance blushed lightly, “Not like, full on conversations.”
“Can I?” Shiro seemed genuinely excited, and something like alarm must have shown on Lance’s face because he quickly added, “Sorry, is that weird? I didn’t-“
“No,” Lance cut him off, “It’s not weird. It’s nice…”
Lance sat back on the bed, and leaned against the pillows, before gesturing towards his stomach. “Go crazy,” he smiled.
Shiro moved to sit next to him, then hesitated, “Uh- What should I say?”
“You’re the one who brought it up!” Shiro looked abashed and Lance huffed a laugh, “Say whatever you want to say. Tell them how cool I am and how lucky they are to have me as a mom, you know, stuff like that,” he grinned.
He expected Shiro to laugh or roll his eyes after that comment but the expression on his face conveyed warm agreement, soft and sweet. “Okay,” he said, leaning forward.
“Hi baby,” he paused, pink staining his cheeks at the knowing grin from Lance, “You’re coming into a weird situation – aliens, and space exploration and actual robot lions – but at least you’re gonna have a great mom through all of it.”
He very purposely didn’t look at Lance’s face before he continued, “He’s really funny, he always knows how to lighten a tense situation and make everyone else relax. Not to mention he’s selfless and dependable, someone you know you can count on, someone you want at your back in a fight.”
Lance made a soft noise but Shiro persisted without looking up, “Plus he’s gorgeous, I really hope you get his eyes – they’re like the ocean, I could drown in them. He’s my favorite person… You’re so lucky to have him as your mother…”
He trailed off, finally turning to look at Lance, who was staring – his hands cupped over the bottom half of his face, his cheeks wet from the tears spilling from his eyes. Eyes Shiro loved, apparently.
“Shiro…” it was muffled by his hands. “I can’t believe…”
Shiro moved to lean against the wall, pulling Lance up to straddle his lap.
“How was I so blind to your feelings this entire time,” Lance moaned, buying his face into Shiro’s neck. “I feel like such an asshole…”
“Hey, you’re not,” Shiro admonished, “It’s not like I made it obvious.”
Lance leaned back, “Yeah but like, everyone knew but me!”
Shiro flushed, “Oookay, that’s good to know.”
“Oh, sorry,” Lance ducked his head, “I didn’t mean to make that sound-“
“No, no,” Shiro tried to shake off his blush, “It’s fine. Obviously, I’m not as discreet as I believed but either way, I never actually told you.”
He pulled Lance even closer, bringing their faces together. “I’ve watched you for a lot of years now, Lance. Even before I realized I had feelings for you, I was watching you. There’s something about you that just draws my eye… I- anyway, one of the things I’ve noticed about you is that you take people at face value. Which is good! You’re really honest and open and it’s like you expect everyone else to be the same.”
“Yeah it’s great, love it when hot alien chicks handcuff me to pillars,” Lance huffed, trying to contain his smile.
“You might be a little too trusting…” Shiro pulled him in for a kiss, “But it’s one of the things I love about you.”
Everything is Lance’s life was going so well. He hadn’t been so happy in years. Definitely not since he’d been launched into space by a robotic Blue Lion.
So of course, it had to blow up in his face spectacularly.
Lance wasn’t so wrapped up in his new-found romance with Shiro that he could pretend there wasn’t anything to worry about. But he could ignore it. And ignore it he did, until one morning he walked into the kitchen and the source of all his worries was sitting at the table.
“Hey Lance,” Keith said warmly, a cup of not-coffee in front of him.
Lance froze, his eyes wide. Keith continued to look at him, waiting for a return greeting. Lance probably would have stood there forever had Shiro not walked up behind him, placing large hands on his shoulders.
“Okay, baby?” He said, low enough for Lance’s ears only.
“Shiro!” Keith shouted, standing up and moving to embrace the older Alpha.
Lance could tell immediately that Shiro hadn’t been aware of the other man’s presence, when his hands jumped lightly on his shoulders, before squeezing gently and pulling Lance back against his chest. His arms wrapped protectively around the Omega’s shoulders, and Lance felt himself untense as Shiro’s defensive pheromones spiked suddenly.
Keith paused, his hands coming up – palms bared, and stepped back. “Whoa, man,” he was trying to look unthreatening, Lance could tell. “Not trying to start anything.”
“Keith,” Shiro’s greeting was clipped.
The Red Paladin moved to retake his seat, his posture preternaturally calm. “So, you finally came clean to Lance?” He smiled and gestured to the embrace both men had yet to move from. Lance’s eye widened, and he looked up at Shiro helplessly.
“Yeah, we’re together now,” Shiro’s words were matter of fact, but Lance could feel his heartbeat thundering, his possessive Alpha instincts at war with his mastered sense of calm and clarity.
“That’s great,” Keith smiled, and to Lance it seemed genuine. “I’m really happy for you both.”
“Keith…” The tone of Shiro’s voice had Lance whining low in his throat. “We need to talk.”
“Shiro, no-“ A harsh squeeze to his shoulders cut Lance off.
“Yeah of course, I’ve got a lot of information from the Blades I need to fill everyone in on, I was going to wait for Allura bu-“ Keith was moving to stand up again, but a harsh growl from Shiro had him sitting back down.
If Shiro hadn’t had such a tight grip on him, Lance’s would have been on the floor because his knees buckled at that sound. It was a posturing growl, exchanged between fighting Alphas. Strong enough to force Keith back down, it turned Lance into a puddle.
“Shiro, what the fuck,” Keith regained his feet, an embarrassed flush staining his face.
At the same time, Lance found his strength and turned around to grab Shiro’s face and pull his head down to make eye contact.
“Shiro, please don’t do this,” Lance pleaded, tears shining in his eyes. “Please stop.”
Shiro seemed to come out of his instinct driven state to look at Lance. His face softened minutely, and he wrapped his hand around Lance’s neck, pulling him in for a soft kiss.
Lance felt relief flow through his body and let himself be turned around.
Shiro used this brief lowering of his guard to open the kitchen door that had closed behind them and push Lance gently out of the room.
Lance’s eyes were wide with shock as he watched the Alpha step back, before reaching over to close the door again.
“Shiro?” He rushed forward, placing his hand against the key panel, but nothing happened. Shiro had locked the door. “Shiro!”
He heard growling from inside and his blood ran cold. He pressed his hand to his stomach, fighting the urge to drop to the ground.
Fuck his Omega instincts, his boyfriend was about to kill the father of his child. Shiro was about to kill his best friend!
Lance took off running, not sure where any of the other Paladins would be but knowing he needed to stop what was about to happen in the kitchen.
He burst onto the bridge, his face sweaty and his lungs burning as he tried to pull in air. Allura and Coran both jumped, obviously startled.
“Shiro-“ he panted, “and Keith- they’re fighting.”
“What?” Allura looked alarmed but Coran looked knowing and grabbed the Princess’s arm to start pulling her towards the door.
“Where are they, Lance?” He called, not waiting for an answer.
Lance was already following, “The kitchen!”
They got there just in time to find Pidge and Hunk pressing on the key panel, shared looks of annoyance at the malfunction.
“The lock is jam-“ Pidge started to say, but was cut off by a snarled shout from inside. She looked at the door, shocked. “Was that-?”
Allura was already pushing her out of the way, pressing her hand against the panel to override the locking mechanism. The doors whooshed open and the growling from inside was no longer muffled.
Hunk gasped, and Lance couldn’t help the pitiful moan that escaped his throat at the sight before them all.
The table, which up until this point Lance had believed was bolted down, was thrown to the side. The chairs were pushed to the walls, one of them mangled in a way that was obvious it had been thrown. There was blood on the floor and smeared along one of the walls.
Shiro and Keith stood at opposite sides, their heads both down to protect their necks, chests heaving and growls emanating without pause.
It was clear the blood had come from Shiro, it was still spilling from his nose into his mouth, his bared teeth slick with it.
Keith looked worse off by far, there was bruising around his neck already, oozing scratches from Shiro’s nails. His shoulder was being held at an odd angle, clearly damaged, his other arm holding it still to prevent too much movement.
Neither Alpha seemed to notice their audience, and everyone watching was frozen into inaction.
Keith took a slight step forward and Shiro was across the room immediately, using Keith’s broken arm against him, pressing his back against the wall, leaning his entire weight into the other Alpha. He yanked Keith’s hair back and made to grab at his throat with his teeth, but Keith’s leg came up to hook behind his knee and they toppled to the floor.
Lance could only assume it was the Alpha instincts driving them to fight so viscerally, as Shiro hadn’t activated his weaponized arm and neither man had made to summon their Bayards.
Shiro used his size and strength to flip them, pushing Keith face first into the floor, his knee pressing into the smaller Alpha’s lower back as he pulled painfully on his broken arm. There was a horrific crunching noise and Keith cried out in agony.
This noise seemed to snap everyone out of their trance, and Allura rushed forward, using her impressive strength to push Shiro off of the other man. Shiro’s arm came up instinctively, to take on the new challenger, but Coran was ready, and he grabbed the Black Paladin from behind, pulling his arms behind his back to hold him still.
Hunk and Pidge immediately moved to pull Keith off the floor, taking care to not jostle his arm. It was clear from his dazed expression and lack of reaction that the pain was overpowering his innate Alpha desire to dominate.
“What is going on here?!” Allura screamed, standing between the two men.
Shiro was coming back to himself, his expression clearing of intense rage, but his eyes were still hateful as he looked at Keith.
“I don’t want him on this ship, I don’t want him in Voltron, and I don’t want him near Lance!”
Everyone immediately turned to look at Lance.
The Blue Paladin was still in the doorway, on his knees, his hands clutched protectively over his stomach as he heaved with silent tears. The scent of enraged Alpha was overwhelming, and if he hasn’t been so concerned with protecting his child, he would have been on his hands and knees, throat bared.
He pulled his hands away to cover his mouth, his head shaking in disbelief at everything that was occurring. He couldn’t keep his hands from his stomach for long though, and it did not go unnoticed by the team.
“I never meant-“ Keith started and the team turned their attention back to the fight.
Shiro’s eyes had never left Keith, his face still twisted in disgust as he said, “I don’t give a fuck what you meant, it’s what you did!” He tried to pull out of Coran’s hold but the Altean tightened his grip.
“Shiro-“ Keith was crying, fat tear rolling down his face. Seeing that made Lance shake.
“You were my brother, Keith,” Shiro’s voice sounded near tears as well, Lance was too scared to look, afraid of what he might see. “I can never trust you again.”
Pidge gasped, summing up what everyone was feeling.
“Someone tell me what is going on here!” Allura yelled, but neither Alpha looked at her.
Hunk, on the other hand, was releasing Keith to slide against the floor, moving over quickly to grab Lance.
“Lance,” he dropped down to his knees, pulling Lance against him. “It’s okay.” The second his hands touched Lance, the dam broke, and his silent crying gave way to heaving sobs.
Shiro and Keith’s faces both snapped over immediately, their attention diverted by the sounds of a distressed Omega.
Shiro tried once again to pull away from Coran but the older man held strong, telling him, “Let him be, Shiro.”
Allura asked again, “Please, can someone tell me what has happened? Why are two of my Paladins trying to kill each other?”
Surprisingly, Hunk answered. “I think…” he looked at Lance questioningly, whose crying was quieter but steady. The Omega looked at his friend meaningfully, then nodded softly.
“I think Lance is pregnant.”
Everyone paused collectively. Allura’s shocked gaze turned to Lance, before looking to Shiro. At the obvious anger on Shiro’s face, she looked at Keith, who looked devastated.
“Oh dear…” She looked at Coran and knew immediately that her advisor had been aware. “Coran, I can’t believe you would let him keep this a secret.”
“I’m sorry, Princess,” his voice was contrite, but his expression was unwavering. “It was not my place to tell.”
“That doesn’t explain why Shiro and Keith are trying to kill each other,” Pidge spoke up.
“Because Keith is a rapist,” Shiro spat angrily.
Pidge and Allura gasped, while Hunk – sweet, Beta Hunk – growled, pulling Lance to him tighter.
“It wasn’t like that!” Keith shouted, but everyone was looking at him accusingly.
Shiro began to growl again and was finally able to pull free of Coran to rush across the room. He only had room to take three steps before someone was blocking his path.
Lance had pulled out of Hunks hold, adrenaline coursing through him as he vaulted across the room, jumping in front of Keith with his hands up to press against Shiro’s chest.
“Shiro,” his voice was low and gravely from his wailing. Shiro paused, eyes wide, and Lance used his opportunity to grab his face, bringing their foreheads together.
“It’s okay, Shiro,” he lowered his voice and a soft chattering noise issued forth from his chest. He pulled the Alpha’s face lower, and twisted his head to bare his throat, presenting his Omega glands and producing the calmest scent he was capable of.
Shiro’s hands came up to touch his hips before sliding upwards and winding around his waist.
Lance let his arms wrap around Shiro’s shoulders, continuing to make soothing noises.
Everyone in the room watched as Shiro’s muscles loosened, his eyelids drooping as his aggressive Alpha response began to pass and his sanity began to return.
Lance pulled away, taking Shiro’s hand in both of his.
“Keith is right,” Lance could hear Keith gasp softly behind him. “It wasn’t like that.”
He looked over at everyone, trying to ignore their disbelieving expressions.
“I’m sorry that it came out like this, but I am pregnant.” He paused when Shiro squeezed his hand.
“I would get Keith into a healing pod as soon as possible. We can… talk about this later.” And with that Lance left the kitchen, and the absolute wreckage behind him, hand still clasped with Shiro’s.
When they reached the bedroom, Shiro still seemed to be in a daze. He let Lance push him down to sit on the edge of bed and remained there as the Omega moved to the bathroom to grab a wet cloth.
Lance stood between Shiro’s spread knees, holding his face with one hand as the other smoothed the rag across his chin and neck, wiping away the blood. His nose wasn’t broken but there was already dark bruising spreading across his face. He continued to make soft, natural calming noises in his throat – Shiro heavily effected by them, his eyes closed, returning chuffing noises occasionally.
When he was finished, he nudged at Shiro’s feet, encouraging the Alpha to remove his boots. Lance pulled the tee shirt he was wearing over his head, and started unbuttoning his pants, tugging lightly. Shiro caught on quickly, lifting his hips to assist, while swiftly undoing Lance’s own pants, hooking his fingers in the elastic of his boxer briefs and pulling down.
Lance whipped his own shirt over his head, moving to straddle Shiro who immediately flipped them, his heightened Alpha instincts driving him to be on top, to dominate.
Lance moaned as Shiro pressed his face into his neck, licking and sucking as he went. He wound his legs around Shiro, and the Alpha immediately began to rut against him, his hard cock slipping in the slick dripping from Lance. Shiro growled when he felt how wet Lance was, how obviously turned on he was by Shiro’s posturing.
Shiro reached down to grasp his erection, guiding it to Lance’s sopping hole. ”My Omega,” he moaned as he sank into the tight, wet passage.
Lance cried out, his hands coming up to hold Shiro’s face, guiding him to look at Lance directly. “My Alpha,” he said, firmly and clearly.
Shiro groaned, both hands coming up to brace on the mattress as he set an arduous pace, his hips snapping forward and driving his cock as deep as possible.
Lance tried his best to hold on, his legs falling back to the mattress but his arms winding around Shiro’s shoulders, scratching at his back, moaning incessantly.
The thrill of the fight was still singing in his blood and it seemed like no time at all before Lance felt Shiro’s knot swelling, pressing up against the rim of his hole. Shiro had only knotted him once, that first time they’d had penetrative sex, and that time the Alpha had been hesitant and gentle.
This time was different.
Shiro growled the second he felt it, his face moving back to Lance’s neck to scent him aggressively. He thrust upwards hard, no question in his mind about knotting his Omega, when Lance whispered, “Claim me.”
Shiro didn’t hesitate, shoving his knot past the tight ring of muscles, hand in Lance’s hair to pull his head back enough and make room for his teeth to clamp down over his Omega gland.
Lance screamed, his nails raking down Shiro’s back, leaving thin bloody trails. His body shook with orgasm, thighs falling even further apart to give Shiro room to grind his knot as deeply as possible. The bite hurt. It hurt so fucking bad. Lance never wanted it to stop.
Shiro’s head was clouded with the scent of sated, bonded, Omega – Lance’s pheromones just as strong as the rage he’d experienced earlier. He pulled back, sucking Lance’s blood from his teeth before licking at the gouges he’d left. Driven by some indecipherable instinct Shiro sank his teeth back into the marks, drawing more blood, and Lance tightened around his knot with another orgasm.
Shiro hadn’t even noticed his own orgasm, so caught up in the emotions brought on by claiming Lance, but he felt his come ooze slightly around him with Lance’s pulses.
Shiro continued to lick at the wound, waiting for his knot to go down so they could move to a more comfortable position, when Lance said softly, “I love you, Takashi.”
Lance watched as Shiro pulled back, and his heart ached at the wetness in the Alpha’s eyes.
“I love you, Lance.” He drew Lance into a kiss, pulling away to rest their foreheads together. “I’m so sorry.”
Lance didn’t need to ask what for.
“I never meant,” he stopped then tried again. “That’s not how I wanted- ugh, I can’t believe I-“
Lance touched his face softly and Shiro took a deep breath.
“I’m sorry I made a scene and outed you to everyone. I knew Keith would return eventually and that we would have to confront everything that happened. But I don’t know, it was like, I could smell how alarmed you were. And that triggered something in me, it was like my vision whited out…”
He went on, sighing. “It’s still no excuse. I never should have let myself get to that point.”
Shiro felt the give between them and he pulled out gently, drawing a soft moan from Lance. He moved to lay down, rolling the Omega to face him.
“Keith didn’t rape me.” Lance said calmly. “I could have fought him off Shiro, I’m not helpless.”
“I know,” Shiro said, “I absolutely know that Lance. But he did take advantage of you, he hurt you.”
“Yeah, he did.” Lance replied quietly.
Shiro turned to lay back, staring at the ceiling, “And selfishly, he hurt me too. Keith was fully aware of my feelings for you.”
Lance felt his eyes grow wet, and he laid his head down on Shiro’s chest.
“I’m sorry, Shiro.”
“There’s going to be some major fallout from this morning,” Shiro replied, his hand drifting down to press against Lance’s belly. Lance could feel the baby reacting to the Alpha’s presence. “But we’ll deal with it later. I’ve only been awake for a little while and already I need a nap.”
Lance smiled and moved into a more comfortable cuddle, spooned up against the Alpha’s side.
They slept for hours, moving against each other like the tide. When Lance awoke, it was to the rare experience of Shiro still being asleep.
He turned to watch the older man, his chest rising and falling with every breath. His Alpha. His mate. Lance reached up to touch his neck, hissing at the sting from Shiro’s bite.
The soft noise was enough to wake Shiro, who opened his eyes suddenly, his body tensing before becoming aware of his surroundings and relaxing again.
“What do you dream about?” Lance asked Shiro.
Shiro shrugged, “Home, sometimes. The Galra prisons, often. Fighting in the arena, occasionally.” He pushed Lance’s hair away from his face, “You, if I’m lucky.”
“Softie,” he blushed at the Alpha, who pressed him backwards, tongue licking wetly over his Bond Bite.
Lance hummed, “I love you, Shiro.”
He could feel Shiro’s smile against his throat. “What happened to Takashi?”
Lance’s face grew warm, “Do you like that?”
“When you say it,” he replied, kissing his way back up until their lips met, his tongue skating across the roof of Lance’s mouth.
They continued to kiss lazily until Lance noticed the fact that their sheets were literally stuck to his skin with come. After a shower, they both stood in the bedroom, slowly dressing.
Lance chose a soft tee shirt, which stretched tight across his belly. In case anyone had been doubtful of the truth, might as well drive home the point with physical evidence.
Shiro held Lance’s face in his hands, pressing kisses to his forehead, both eyelids, his nose, his cheeks and finally – right over his fresh Bond Bite.
“Well, now or never,” Lance said, determined.
They held hands as they walked through the halls, before arriving at the bridge. Everyone was there, with the exception of Keith.
At their entrance, all conversation died. From the looks on their faces, the mornings events were still the hot topic. Lance watched as one by one they all looked at his stomach, before looking back up to his face nervously.
Only Coran appeared normal, stepping towards the couple to give Lance a tight hug.
Lance froze momentarily before releasing Shiro’s hand to wrap his arms around the Altean.
Coran pulled back, saying “You’re looking well, Blue.”
This seemed to snap everyone out of their nerves, and suddenly he was surrounded by the entire team, even Allura, pulling him into hugs and petting his hair, hands pressing against his round belly.
Pidge saying, “I knew you were getting fat!” and Lance glaring at her.
Hunk hugging him hardest of all, “I can’t believe you didn’t tell me!”
Allura’s musical voice telling him about a former Paladin who had been pregnant at one point as well. “Though we’ll have to find someone to pilot your Lion when your stomach is too round for you to reach the controls over!”
Shiro watched everything from the sidelines, his expression guarded but his eyes warm as they looked at Lance.
When Lance tore his attention away from the team to find Shiro, the others shifted their gazes as well, looking to the Black Paladin.
With everyone’s focus on him, Shiro took a deep breath and said, “I apologize for my behavior this morning. It was incredibly unbecoming of the leader of Voltron, and not how I wish to conduct myself.”
Allura nodded at his remorse, but Hunk said angrily, “I don’t think anyone blames you dude, if Keith did what you said he did.”
Shiro’s face hardened but he shook his head, “I misspoke.” He paused, “While Keith isn’t entirely blameless in all of this, I shouldn’t have made it sound like that.”
The heads in the room shifted to Lance, even Coran looked curious, after weeks of wondering himself.
Lance blushed, “Keith and I… It was only once, he got caught up in my heat scent and I, uh, didn’t discourage him…”
“Lance, that’s basically rape,” Hunk argued, still angry, despite his friends claims. “Everyone knows you don’t go near an Omega in heat without their permission!”
Shiro growled slightly in agreement, but quickly got himself under control again.
“Omegas aren’t weak willed bitches waiting to be bred, Hunk. That’s just a shitty stereo-type that I would think you were smart enough to realize isn’t true.”
Hunk reared back at the anger in Lance’s voice, “That’s not what I think-“ He started, but Lance cut him off.
“Look, it’s like Shiro said. Keith was stupid, and I was stupid back. It was a mistake we both made, and this is the result.” He pressed his hands against his stomach.
“I don’t want everyone to hate Keith,” he said softly.
“Well, we’re certainly not gonna like him a whole lot, after this,” Pidge spoke up. “I get where you’re coming from Lance, being an Omega doesn’t make you weak. But Keith crossed the line. You were in heat and everyone knows how much you had a crush on him!”
Lance flushed, and Pidge slapped her hands over her mouth.
“I didn’t mean-“ She began, but Shiro cut her off, moving to grab Lance’s hand.
“What’s done is done.” He stated. “Lance insists that Keith isn’t the aggressor and I have to believe what he says.”
“Look,” Lance said. “I spent a lot of time being miserable about this, and then being angry. Eventually I made peace with the situation, and honestly, I’m happier now than I ever have been.”
He looked at Shiro meaningfully, and everyone knew what he meant.
“I don’t want to play the blame game.”
The tension in the room seemed to drain out all at once. Lance knew that it would be some time before the team dynamic from before would return, if it ever would. It would take time for everyone to accept what had occurred between Keith and himself.
He was still torn over his feelings regarding Keith as well. He needed to talk to him. As soon as possible.
“In the meantime, I’m having a baby!” He laughed disbelievingly, and everyone instantly perked up, moving back to hug him again and asking questions.
“Is it a girl or boy?” Pidge asked, pressing her small hand against his stomach once more.
“I don’t know, actually.”
Coran chimed in, “I do!” Everyone whirled on him, shouts of “Well?!” and “Spill!”
Coran looked at him questioningly and Lance shrugged with a smile.
“It’s a girl.”
A girl.
Lance was going to have a baby girl.
Shiro’s arms came up around him, pulling the Omega back against his chest. Lance couldn’t help relaxing back against him with a smile.
They were going to have a baby girl.
The team devolved into excited chatter, discussing all the details of raising a girl. Someone asked what he was going to name her, and when Lance jokingly replied “Lancita!” Shiro finally joined in with, “Still no, Lance!”
Shiro and Allura began to discuss the game plan for Lance’s ongoing pregnancy and what they would do for a Blue Paladin when the time grew closer. Hunk and Pidge continued to debate names, each one more awful than the last. Coran started to tell Lance about all the different methods of baby-proofing the Castle of Lions that he had employed during Allura’s childhood.
However, it wasn’t easy for Lance to forget the fact that one member of their party was not present.
Shiro seemed to have the same thought just as he did, their eyes meeting across the room.
They made their excuses and started to pull away, claiming they were tired, to which Hunk said, “Right, tired, sure. We all saw that Bond Bite!”
Lance blushed and Shiro grinned proudly, but they eventually made their way out.
“Where do you think he is?” Lance asked, holding Shiro’s hand tightly.
“Training rooms, probably. Or hiding in his room.” They walked the long halls to the training corridor, but all of the doors were open, the rooms empty.
Turning back, they headed towards the bedrooms, but before they could get there, Lance paused, scenting the air.
“I don’t think he’s in his room.” Tugging on the Alpha’s hand, he led them towards the lower floors, the scent of anxious, jumpy Alpha guiding their path.
Lance’s eyes widened when he realized where Keith was.
Shiro growled slightly when he looked at the door to Lance’s heat nest, uneasy with this entire situation.
Lance shushed him, then said, “I’m going to go in and talk to him.”
“Not by yourself!” Shiro huffed, but Lance held up his hand.
“Shiro, this is Keith. Our friend. Your friend.” At the dark look from Shiro, Lance continued. “Wait right outside. If you hear anything you’re worried about, rip it out of the frame if you want.”
“Lance…” he tried not to growl, but it was a near thing.
Lance pressed a kiss to his mouth, “Relax.”
He opened the door quickly and stepped inside, closing it behind him.
Keith’s head snapped up from where it was pressed to his knees, back against the wall. His injuries from earlier were clearly healed but he still looked awful.
“Lance,” his eyes were wide.
“Hey buddy,” Lance replied, forcing his voice to remain light. He moved to sit on the floor as well, opposite of Keith.
He couldn’t help seeing the way Keith’s eyes were glued to his belly, fear evident in his eyes.
“Where’s Shiro?” He asked, his eyes moving to the door.
“Outside,” Lance replied calmly. “He’s really sorry for what happened earlier.”
Keith scoffed, “I doubt that.” Shame bled into his face, “Lance, I…”
Lance remained silent, waiting, until it became clear Keith would not be finishing his sentence.
“You?” He didn’t mean to sound so catty, but it bled into his voice anyway.
“Is that really my baby?” He asked, instead.
“No.” Lance said firmly. “You got me pregnant, yeah, but this is not your baby. It never will be.”
“That’s not what I meant-“
Lance cut him off, “I just wanted to make that really clear.”
“I would never try to take your baby away from you Lance, even if I am the father.”
They were silent for a few minutes, both caught up in their own thoughts until Keith began to speak.
“I kind of thought I dreamt it, you know?” Lance snorted as Keith echoed his own words to Shiro all those weeks ago.
“After your heat, you never brought it up, never confronted me. You were distant, I see that now, but at the time I just thought it was because I had been such a dick before your heat.”
Lance huffed his agreement with that statement.
“I don’t know what it was, you’re not the first Omega I’ve been around, not even the first heat scent I’ve ever encountered. But something about it… It drove me wild. I couldn’t think straight when you were near, I was even dreaming about you!”
Keith paused before continuing, “If it wasn’t for Shiro, I probably would have just come on to you and done the normal Alpha-Omega thing.”
Lances eyes were huge at this confession, “What’s Shiro got to do with it?”
“Oh, come on Lance, you must know by now that Shiro’s been into you forever. I knew that better than anyone, I’m the one he always confided in. Shiro’s my best friend, I couldn’t do that to him.”
He huffed then, putting his head in his hands, “Instead I just did way worse,” his voice broke, and Lance was alarmed to see that he was crying.
“That day-“ he stopped, wiping his face with his hands. “That day, I was so fucking stupid. I thought that I could just go near you, I just wanted to scent you, I thought it would relax me enough that I could finally sleep. But then I got close enough to hear you, and you said my name.”
Lance flushed with embarrassment, “That doesn’t mean anything.”
“I know, I swear I know that, logically, but I just- I blacked out. I only remember flashes, it honestly feels more like a dream than anything.”
He pulled his head up, making eye contact with Lance for the first time, and his shoulders began to shake as he cried harder.
“But I do remember you crying. I can’t get it out of my head. Shiro was right, I raped you.” He squeezed his eyes closed and pressed his hands against his face.
Lance was fighting the urge to move across the floor and comfort Keith, a strange feeling indeed, so instead he said, “I wish people would stop telling me I’ve been raped.”
Keith’s eyes popped open, and he looked askance.
“I can’t change the way you feel about what happened Keith, but as far as I’m concerned, I consented to what happened. I had the opportunity to stop you and I didn’t because I wanted it.”
“Lance, I-“
“No, it’s my turn.” Keith’s eyes grew wide at those words.
“I was in heat and gagging for it and I took the opportunity when it was presented. Would I go back and make the same choice? I don’t know, life has changed for me a lot since then. But I can tell you, the only reason everything hurt so bad is that you acted like nothing fucking happened.”
His voice was getting louder, “If you had just manned up and said something to me afterwards, a lot of things would be different. You definitely wouldn’t have had to fight off Shiro, that’s for sure. I’m a fucking person Keith, you can’t just pretend like nothing happened and hope it will all go away. How old are you?”
Keith looked contrite, his cheeks flushed.
“We fucked, you knotted me, you knocked me up and then you act like we’re just back to how it always was?!”
Lance hadn’t realized how loud his voice had climbed until the door opened and Shiro entered the room. Keith froze, his eyes darting up to the Alpha standing above them both.
Lance, for his part, sagged, the air leaving his sails immediately. He was tired. While it felt good to get Keith’s side of the story and to give him a piece of his mind, he couldn’t help being aware of the futility.
Nothing either of them said was going to change the past.
“Well, that’s all I have to say,” Lance said, at a much more reasonable volume.
Keith looked at Shiro nervously before turning his attention back to Lance, “I know it’s not worth much, but I’m so sorry for hurting you, Lance. I care about you, and I hope one day you can trust me again.”
Shiro scoffed under his breath, and Keith winced at the sound.
Lance pushed to his feet and slid his hands together to dust them off.
“Prove it,” he said, simply.
+
“Soon you’re not going to be able to pilot your Lion, you know,” Allura told him, as she dug deeper into her closet, pulling out articles of clothing to consider then discard on the floor.
“Yeah, I know,” Lance sat on her bed, his hand resting on his stomach. At twenty-four weeks he was very aware of the baby moving inside of him. He tried to ignore the rhythmic jumping coming from his uterus, but his consternation must have shown on his face because Allura was abandoning her search to walk over and ask if he was okay.
“Oh,” he laughed, “yeah, I think the baby has hiccups.”
“Hiccups?” Allura asked, looking curiously at his belly.
Lance grabbed her hand and pulled her up onto the bed, pressing her palm up underneath his shirt, against his skin.
“You know, when you can’t get a deep breath so your body kind of starts grabbing at air?” He stopped talking so that Allura could feel the little skips underneath her hand.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, before Allura finally squealed, “Lance, this is so amazing! I can’t wait to meet your baby.”
Lance smiled at her, laughing to himself over the fact that his pregnancy had brought them closer together, when he’d been so worried she would judge him for it.
She pulled her hand back and gestured to the closet. “Well, I can’t find anything that will fit you more comfortably, I’m afraid. Unless you’re willing to embrace frills and lace-“
“No,” Lance cut her off, “I’m still a dude.”
Allura rolled her eyes at his odd human sensibilities. “Well, we’ll just have to visit the Unilu mall again!” Lance made a face.
“Also, I was thinking I should start trying to bond with your Lion,” she began again, “Shiro and I agree that you’re getting to a point where it’s dangerous to engage in riskier missions.”
Lance started to speak but she bowled him over, “You’re getting so big, and-“
“The baby is only the size of a grapefruit!” Lance interjected to which Allura scrunched her face and said, “A what?”
“Never mind,” Lance deflated.
“Well either way, there’s no point taking risks that are unnecessary, and Keith can take over the Red Lion at any time,” she spoke.
“Can he?” Lance asked under his breath, and Allura gave him a concerned look.
“I think so,” she replied with a worried voice.
Keith had remained in the Castle, though they only knew that because of Coran’s trackers. He avoided everyone like the plague, only venturing to the kitchen when he knew the team was engaged in training then spending his nights in the training rooms when everyone was asleep.
It was really starting to freak Lance out.
He knew was it was like to bury yourself in misery and loneliness, and despite everything that had occurred between them, he didn’t want Keith to go through that.
Maybe he still had feelings for Keith. It was definitely not normal to be empathizing with someone who had hurt him so much, right?
“Maybe you should test that theory first,” Lance suggested, kindly.
The Princess hummed, “Let’s go check and see how long it would take to reach the mall.”
They were currently orbiting a rebel allied planet, Hunk and Pidge had their Lions on the surface, assisting with technical repairs. Despite the populations efforts against the Galra, the threat of attack was low, as they were far outside of the Empire’s territory.
That was why Lance and Allura were so startled when the lights blinked, and the entire ship rocked, the faraway sound of an explosion snapping their attention to the other side of the Castle.
Coran’s voice was over the intercom immediately, “We’re taking on enemy fire! All available Paladin’s to your Lions!”
They ran as quickly as possible, reaching the bridge at the same time as Shiro and Keith, who flushed when he saw Allura, holding her Paladin’s helmet under her arm.
“Oh, I-“ he began, stepping back lightly, but Allura gave him no chance, shoving the Red Bayard into his hand.
“You’re the Red Paladin, Keith,” she told him, her voice neutral but firm. “Take your Lion, protect the Castle.”
Keith nodded, determinedly, avoiding looking towards the Black Paladin, whose expression was unreadable.
“Lance,” Allura spoke, “Please be careful.”
“I always am, Princess,” he smiled lightly, but he couldn’t help thinking to himself that if he’d been a little more careful during his heat, they wouldn’t be having this conversation.
Once they were in their Lions, Lance could see the Galra battleship that had appeared in the sky, right behind the Castle. Thousands of drone ships were pouring from the underside.
It would have been a fearsome sight on its own, but Lance watched in horror as a second battleship appeared behind it, and another one after that.
“Someone leaked our location,” Keith breathed over the coms system.
“Pidge, Hunk, where are you guys?” Shiro’s deep voice was calm and steady, despite what Lance knew he was probably feeling.
Pidge’s voice crackled over the system, “They’ve got us down here too! We’ll try to make it up there, but-“ it cut out briefly, before picking up, “without us!”
Shiro cursed, “We need to take out their command system to disable the drones. Lance, if you can get your Ice Ray close enough to freeze the turrets, your Sonic Cannon should be able to shatter them. Keith, you watch his back.”
“Right!” They both called in unison.
“I’m going after the Ion Cannon, we’ve got to keep them from destroying the castle.”
Lance watched as the Black Lion took off towards the front of the ship and he and Keith immediately headed towards the back.
Usually it was Hunk in charge of disabling the Galra systems, but Lance was confident he could handle the task, he just needed a little more time to pull off multiple steps.
“I’ve got your back, Lance,” Keith told him, as he flipped his Lion around to start taking out drone ships with his Tail Laser.
Lance could feel the baby girl inside him, flipping frantically with the anxiety coursing through him. He breathed deep, trying to will the Ice Ray to push harder when he felt the Red Lion crash into him, his own Lion shuddering under the weight.
“What’s-“ he tried to call, but it was covered by the sound of Keith screaming, “There’s too many, Shiro, I need backup!”
Shiro may have tried to reply but his voice was cutting out as the Lion’s systems flickered, Lance’s entire body shuddering as the Red Lion crashed into him again.
“Keith, my Lion can’t take another-“ but he never got the chance to reply as the Red Lion smashed into him a third time and the panels in front of him dimmed, his communications cutting out. He felt, rather than saw, the Blue Lion’s consciousness blink out.
This close to the surface of the planet, he immediately began to plummet. Without the stabilization system, Lance jerked harshly against the belts holding him in, his belly pressing heavily into the gear shifts in front of him.
Instantly he was vomiting, sour bile burning up his throat, and only the sensation of it dripping into his nostrils made him realize he was upside down, the Lion flipping head over tail. He scrambled to shield his stomach and, in his haste to protect himself, pulled on the belt release.
Lance only had a moment for fear to wash over him as he flew forward against the view screen, slamming his helmet into the glass, and lost consciousness.
Shiro’s heart was in his throat as he watched the Blue Lion freefall to the surface. The brief relief he felt as he saw the Yellow and Green lion race past him was drowned out by the fact that Lance wasn’t responding, his Lion’s eyes dim and empty.
“Take out those ships, Shiro,” Keith’s voice told him, “I’ll get Lance!”
Despite every facet of his being telling him to follow Lance, his military mind agreed with Keith, knowing his Lion was faster and could reach Lance first.
Pidge and Hunk were cheering distantly in the background as they took out the first ship, and he was briefly concerned about his own communication systems until he realized it wasn’t a malfunction but the ringing in his ears – so loud he could barely hear.
“Right,” Shiro replied, coming back to himself. “If he can’t get his systems back online, get his Lion to the surface as safely as possible.”
“I won’t let you down,” Keith’s voice was confident and Shiro prayed it wasn’t false.
Shiro snapped into action, moving quickly to join Pidge and Hunk while Keith spun back towards Lance, urging his Lion as fast as possible until he was underneath the plummeting Blue Lion.
He braced himself for impact but couldn’t help his gasp as the Lion’s entire weight slammed into him, pushing them both to the surface, at a slower rate.
Keith opened up a communications line directly to the Blue Lion and tried to call out to Lance, but he was met with chilling silence.
With no way of communicating with the Blue Paladin or attempting to restart the system, Keith put all of his effort into guiding them both to the surface as carefully as possible.
It still rocked his entire Lion painfully when they hit, the shock only partly absorbed by the soft, wet dirt below them.
Keith was out of his Lion in record time, tearing off his helmet and running towards the other ship, slamming open the emergency hatch underneath. He scrambled inside and immediately gagged as he was hit with the smell of vomit.
Vomit, and something else, something tangier.
He couldn’t help the horrified sound that escaped him when he saw the blood streaked across the floor. He rushed across the room, finding Lance shoved into a tight corner, trapped. Keith released Lance’s helmet and pulled it off, examining the gash across his temple, attempting to wipe away the blood to see its severity.
Lance moaned slightly, and Keith felt relief flood through him, as he dragged Lance into a tight hug.
It was relief short lived as Lance tipped his head forward, vomiting frothy yellow liquid all over them both.
“Lance, oh my God,” Keith cried, grasping the Blue Paladin’s face, trying to get him to look at him. Lance’s eyes remained closed.
Keith wrapped his arms around the Omega’s waist to move him. He placed his foot firmly on the floor for leverage, but he slipped, falling back against Lance.
Looking down he saw what he’d slipped in.
Blood.
Thick and dark, unlike the bright red pouring from his head wound.
Keith’s eye widened in alarm as he followed the trail to its source, the crotch of Lance’s Paladin uniform saturated with it.
“Lance,” he moaned, pulling the Blue Paladin closer to his chest, this time merely holding him tight, burying his own face against his neck.
He reached up to his collar, activating the emergency communication channel. He was immediately assaulted with the voices of the other Paladins, Shiro’s whipping out instruction. He listened long enough to tell that the main threats had been eliminated before saying, “Guys, we need help.”
The chattering stopped immediately.
“We’re on the surface, Lance is-“ his voice broke, and he heard Allura gasp.
Coran’s voice cut in, “I can see his vitals! They’re dropping but he’s alive!”
There was a collective breath of relief before Shiro yelled, “I’m on my way.”
Keith continued to cradle the Blue Paladin in his arms, unmindful of the tears pouring from his face into the soft brown hair.
“I’m so sorry, Lance,” he breathed, squeezing his eyes shut. “Our baby… I’m so sorry.”
He continued to whisper begging apologies to the Omega, running his fingers through his hair, making soothing noises. Lance remained very still in his arms.
He didn’t even notice the Black Paladin’s arrival until a hand was at his shoulder, gripping him roughly. He looked up at Shiro, fear in his eyes but his arms tightened around Lance protectively.
Shiro seemed to understand, and he crouched down next to them both. Without words, they lifted Lance and pulled him from the corner he was trapped in.
Once they were safely out of the way of the smeared blood on the floor, Keith released his hold and Shiro bent low, sliding his arm under Lance’s legs in a bridal carry.
They were just stepping out of the Lion when Pidge ran up. She cupped her mouth when she saw them, eyes taking in the blood smeared on all three of them. She gathered her resolve and told them, “I’ll get Lance’s Lion back online. You guys get him to the ship.”
“I’ll fly us, Shiro, Pidge can keep an eye on the Black Lion.” Keith began hurrying towards his own lion, Shiro moving behind him without comment.
They were back at the Castle in record time, Coran meeting them in the hangar bay, his eyes wide with fear but his hands steady as took Lance’s vitals manually.
Shiro carried him to the med bay and through it all Lance remained placid until suddenly he wasn’t, his body seizing up violently, more frothy bile spilling from his mouth.
“Lay him on the table, on his side!” Coran shouted, moving towards the medical equipment. “He’s seizing from the head injury, don’t let him choke.” Shiro held him in an incline until his body untensed and sagged back to the table.
Allura stood in the doorway with Keith, both of their faces wet with tears, “Can’t we put him into the healing pod?” She cried.
“No,” Coran spoke calmly, he’d finally removed Lance’s armor and was moving to start cutting away the spandex uniform underneath. “With a concussion he’ll need to be woken up first.”
He hesitated and then went on, “And… he’ll more than likely enter labor soon, a miscarriage this late has to be passed much like a natural birth.”
“What?” Shiro looked up, alarmed. Behind him Keith gasped wetly.
Coran looked at him then, grief in his expression. “The child’s vitals cut out sometime during the free fall Shiro, I’m so sorry.”
Allura began to sob, and Keith pulled her into a tight embrace, his own expression devastated.
Shiro hadn’t moved. He continued to watch Coran undress the Blue Paladin, his grip relaxing when the Altean pulled his hands away to make room. He could see the black, viscous blood sticking the uniform to Lance’s skin, mostly concentrated between his legs.
Coran moved Lance onto his back, spreading Lance’s legs and pushing his knees to his chest, propping them up on expandable bracers in the table. He looked at Shiro and said, “Hold his head between your hands, if he starts to vomit again, turn him sideways immediately.”
Shiro nodded unthinkingly, moving to the head of the table. Just then Lance gasped, and Shiro could actually see the clenching of his belly.
“That will be the contractions,” Coran said, almost to himself. He pulled a blanket to cover Lance’s lap, providing some semblance of privacy from all the onlookers.
Shiro stared down at Lance, whose eyes remained closed, dark bruises forming underneath his eyelashes. He let his hand drift down to the Bond Bite, his fingers caressing the newly formed scars.
Coran administered a muscle relaxant, to facilitate dilation. After that everything moved very quickly. Pidge and Hunk appeared in the doorway at some point, Shiro barely heard Hunk’s sobs over the sound of his own heartbeat, pounding in his ears.
He watched as Coran finally pulled the very tiny baby girl out, handing her to Allura who was waiting with a blanket, her own eyes red and puffy.
The second she was out Lance began to seize again, even with the muscle relaxant. Shiro moved quickly, and he and Coran had the Omega on his side, Coran’s fingers in his mouth to prevent him from biting his tongue.
After it passed, Coran said, “I’m going to stitch him up and then we’ll have to wake him up.”
Shiro’s unease must have shown on his face because he said, “We can’t let him sleep through a concussion. Once he’s conscious enough we can put him into the healing pod.”
He moved back between the Omega’s legs and Shiro flushed when he realized what Coran had meant by stitching him up. Even a baby so small as the one Lance had given birth to must have taken its toll.
Shiro felt tears well in his eyes for the first time all day.
He’d been frozen in a state of shock since the moment he’d seen Lance’s Lion lose power, and suddenly that feeling was passing. His knees buckled, and he began to sag, he might have hit the floor if he hadn’t felt Keith at his back, supporting his weight.
The buzzing in his ears passed until he could hear himself crying, Keith holding him up despite his greater weight, the Red Paladin pressing his face into Shiro’s back to muffle his own crying.
Shiro got himself under control quickly, tensing his muscles to take his weight back, but he let himself grasp Keith’s hand, not letting go.
He watched as Coran administered another injection into Lance, plunging in a substance that had Lance gasping, his eyes snapping open and his chest lifting from the table. Shiro was at his side at once, grasping the sides of the table to prevent himself from grabbing Lance and potentially hurting him.
Lance’s chest heaved as he tried to breath, and Coran moved to pull him up by the hand, bracing Lance into a sitting position.
Despite his sudden consciousness, Lance appeared unaware of his situation, his eyes cloudy and his head lolling forward. He groaned, attempting to lift his hand towards his head, but the drugs in his system prevented it, which only seemed to spur him on more, out of instinctual fear.
“I’ve got you, baby,” Shiro said gently, and Lance’s confused expression turned to him, before his body relaxed slightly.
“You’re okay Blue, we’ve got you,” Coran soothed, lifting Lance up against him.
Together they maneuvered Lance into the nearest healing pod, laying him back against the reclined surface.
The fearful confusion on Lance’s face tore at Shiro, and he leaned forward into the pod pressing kisses again the Omega until Coran finally touched his shoulder and said, “It’s time, Shiro.”
He stepped back and Shiro activated the barrier, Lance’s eyes immediately falling closed.
Coran moved back to begin cleaning up, and Shiro looked over to Allura, who stood at the counter, her attention completely focused on the bundle laid there.
Shiro walked over and stood behind her, his eyes on the baby she held.
“Human babies aren’t supposed to be this small, are they?” She asked quietly.
Shiro didn’t say anything, he couldn’t, his eyes were once again filling with tears at the sight of Lance’s daughter, so small and hairless, the skin so thin he could see every vein underneath. Beyond that, she looked just like a baby, fully formed, but very tiny.
His breath hitched and Allura spun around suddenly, pulling him tightly into an embrace.
Coran handled everything, placing the child into a light blue box, the inside lined with soft fabric. He assured Shiro the baby would be preserved until Lance had a chance to see her. Hunk and Pidge eventually departed, after pressing themselves against Shiro in a tight hug.
Coran led Allura away, holding the Princess against him gently, after squeezing Shiro’s shoulder reassuringly.
Shiro and Keith sat side by side on the floor, staring across the room without thought. Lance remained suspended in his healing pod next to them, the soft whir of activity it admitted the only noise in the room. Shiro would have been content to sit in silence forever, his thoughts oddly blank after the excitement of the day, but eventually Keith spoke.
“I’m sorry.”
Shiro felt himself tense, white hot anger shooting through him before it passed, as quick as it’d come. If Keith had tried to apologize to him yesterday, he might have started another fight, might have attacked the Alpha with every ounce of anger he felt at what Keith had done.
“Me, too,” he said, instead.
Keith reached out and grabbed his hand, and Shiro didn’t have the energy to pull away.
“I never meant to hurt you or Lance. I’m so sorry that I did.”
“I know,” Shiro replied.
“Will you- do you think you’ll ever… forgive me?” He sounded small and hesitant, and Shiro was reminded of how young Keith was. How young Lance was too.
“Eventually,” he replied. Keith nodded and began to pull his hand away, but Shiro kept a firm grip, refusing to let him go.
They sat like that for hours, until Coran came back and pushed them out of the med bay.
“He’ll be in there another day at least,” he said, “Get some rest, both of you.”
Shiro showered, trying to ignore the rusty colored water running down the drain.
He laid in bed, positive that he wouldn’t be able to sleep without Lance’s soft, even breathing besides him, but he dropped off almost immediately.
+
Coran recommended pulling Lance from the healing pod early and moving him to a bed before he woke. Shiro laid him in their bed, tucking him in gently before moving to kneel on the floor, his eyes never leaving Lance.
Allura set up all things they would need, medications and sedatives, bottles of water. She seemed desperate to help in some way, piling extra blankets at the foot of the bed. Eventually she ran out of ways to fret, and she leaned over Shiro to softly pet Lance’s face.
“I’ll be just down the hall if you need anything when he wakes up,” she promised, before leaving the room.
Shiro had had to convince the team to give Lance space, knowing how much the Omega would not appreciate an audience when he woke up.
It was almost as if their privacy was the key, and Lance’s eyelids fluttered open, confusion filling his ocean eyes. He looked at Shiro, who was still on his knees beside the bed, before he looked down, his hands pushing below the blanket to touch his stomach.
Shiro could see the second Lance realized the situation, his memories of the fight flooding back, and he moved swiftly to keep Lance from sitting up too quickly.
Lance gasped, before he squeezed his eyes closed and a horrifically pained cry ripped from his throat. Shiro moved to wrap his arms around the Omega, but Lance struck out, fighting Shiro away, his shoulders shaking with sobs.
Shiro took the abuse, trying desperately to calm his partner, whispering soothing words and sounds, flooding the room with protective, calming pheromones.
”Why!” Lance howled, his arms moving to wrap around his stomach, giving Shiro the opportunity to pull him into his lap, his own arms holding the Omega against him tightly.
Shiro didn’t reply, he had been asking himself the same question from the minute Lance’s Lion had fallen.
Why did this have to happen to Lance? Why couldn’t I protect Lance? Why can I never protect Lance when he needs me to?
Lance continued to bawl, his face pressed into Shiro’s throat, his breath hot and humid between them. Shiro could feel the warm tears soaking into his tee shirt. Lance coughed and hiccupped, his emotions pouring out of him until finally his breathing began to even out and his shoulders began to relax. He pulled his arms away from his own waist and wrapped them around Shiro.
“I’m so sorry, baby.” The apology felt useless, and Shiro was struck by how frequently he had used and received those words recently.
Lance didn’t reply, and Shiro moved them both back, laying against the bed. He pulled Lance up against his side, running his hands through the fluffy chocolate hair.
“What happened?” Lance finally asked, his voice thin and tired.
Shiro sighed but told him everything – watching his Lion plummet to the earth, Keith’s rescue, the sound of Keith’s voice when he asked for help, finding Lance unconscious in this Lion, blood everywhere, the way Keith had been holding him. Coran’s quick intervention, the delivery and his subsequent time in the healing pod. He even told him about how he and Keith had held hands on the floor of the med bay, waiting for Lance to wake up.
Lance lay silent in his arms until finally he asked, “Where is she?”
Shiro knew exactly who he meant.
“Coran took good care of her. She’s in a stasis coffer, you can see her as soon as you want.”
“Now,” he said firmly, pulling away from Shiro.
The Black Paladin looked alarmed, “Lance, are you sure, you just-“
“I want to see my daughter,” he interrupted, resolute.
Dressed in soft pajamas, they walked barefoot to the med bay, managing to avoid everyone until they reached the room and found Coran, standing at the counter where the baby’s body lay.
He jumped slightly when they entered the room. “Oh, goodness, gave me a fright.”
“Sorry, Coran,” Shiro apologized. “Lance wanted to come see her.”
“Of course you did, I’m so glad to see you up and about,” he smiled softly at Lance, who only nodded.
Lance walked slowly to the counter and Coran stepped back, “I’ll just give you two some time alone.”
“Thank you,” Shiro replied, and Coran left the room closing the door.
Shiro pulled the lid off and let Lance move close enough to look inside.
True to Coran’s word, the baby inside looked just as she had after Lance had given birth to her. Shiro was certain that if he reached inside, he’d find her skin soft and warm.
Lance had yet to say a word, his hands grasping the side of the counter, trembling slightly. Shiro moved closer to press his body against Lance’s back, allowing the smaller man to relax against him.
“She’s so little,” he said finally. Shiro could hear the tears in his voice.
Lance reached inside, pulling out his daughter, bringing her up to hold under his chin. He could feel the wet warmth running down his face, but he couldn’t stop himself from pressing his cheek against her thin skin.
His baby was dead. This was the first and last time he would hold her in his arms. He would never watch her grow up, never see if she’d inherit his blue eyes or Keith’s dark hair. He’d never see her with Shiro, watch them interact and grow together.
He wasn’t aware of the keening noise escaping his throat until Shiro wrapped his arms tightly around him, hooking his chin over Lance’s shoulder, making soothing noises.
Lance cried until he had nothing left to give, then he gently placed his baby girl back into the blue container and set the lid back on. He turned around in Shiro’s arms and avoided eye contact, saying “I’d like to leave now.”
Shiro kissed his forehead and together they walked back to their room, climbing into bed together. Lance laid his head on Shiro’s chest and let the rhythmic beating of his heart rock him to sleep.
Lance slept on and off for days. He never left the room and ate whenever Shiro brought him food. He probably wouldn’t have bothered showering if it hadn’t been for the night he woke up, panting, his thighs slick with blood.
Shiro sat up immediately, his confusion turning to concern until he realized what was going on.
“Coran said this would probably happen,” he soothed Lance, who was staring at the bloody sheets in horror. “The healing pod doesn’t get rid of everything inside you, and your body has to pass it.”
He bundled Lance up and got him into the shower, before moving back to strip the sheets and replace the bedding.
Lance was sitting on the floor of the shower, watching the blood leaking from his hole wash into the drain. He had a scar across his perineum, from where Coran had apparently stitched him up after the birth.
He flushed with embarrassment, thinking about everything that had occurred. This was all his fault. He shouldn’t have continued to pilot the Blue Lion, he’d taken his own safety for granted and now his daughter was dead.
He buried his face in his hands, pressing the palms against his eyes to try to stifle the flow of tears. He looked up at the sound of Shiro climbing into the shower and crouching down next to him.
“It’s going to get better,” he said, firmly. “I know it doesn’t feel like it now, but you’re strong Lance. You can pick up the pieces and move forward.”
Lance turned to face him, Shiro looked so sincere.
“I just want to stop feeling like this,” Lance huffed, his face crumbling once again.
Shiro pulled Lance up to straddle his lap, unmindful of the blood still leaking from the Omega. With arms wrapped tight around him, he maneuvered Lance’s face against his throat, his scent still obvious despite the water pouring over them both.
It reminded Lance very strongly of that time, so many months ago, right before his heat, when Shiro had embraced him in the hallway, using his scent to calm him down.
Shiro had always been there for him, for so long.
Lance woke up to the sound of Shiro exercising more than a few times, and he would watch the display from the comfort of their bed.
Shiro never pushed him to leave their room, but Lance could tell he was worried by his lethargy.
“Hey, I was thinking,” Shiro said suddenly one morning as he wrapped up his workout. Lance gave him a ‘go on’ look and he continued. “Maybe we could see if Pidge could make some type of antidepressants? Or, even Coran- if you don’t, you know, want to talk to Pidge or-“
Seeing Shiro flustered was still odd, and Lance watched him stumble over his own words before taking pity.
“I could talk to Pidge,” he said, “Or see if Coran knows of anything already available.”
At the obvious relief in Shiro’s eyes, he couldn’t help saying, “Sick of my moping already?” He meant it lightheartedly, as a joke – kind of, but it came out sounding bitter and hurt even to his own ears.
“No, God, Lance,” Shiro sounded frustrated, “Why would you even ask that?”
“Why are you trying to put me back on antidepressants?” Lance tried not to sound angry, but he couldn’t help it. He was angry – angry at Shiro, angry at Keith, angry at this whole fucking situation.
“You said you were on them before! I just want to help you, you’re clearly hurting, and I don’t know what else to do.” Shiro reached out to grab his hands but Lance pulled away first.
“So just drug me instead, that’ll make me easier to be around.” He hissed, unable to control himself.
Shiro threw up his hands, “That’s not- What the fuck, Lance?” The look on his face was pure shock, it made Lance flush with embarrassment, and then for whatever reason, he was crying.
“Shit,” his breath hitched as he leaned back against the wall, hands coming up to hide his eyes. “I’m sorry, I don’t-“
Shiro moved quickly to sit next to him, pulling his hands away from his face, “Stop apologizing.”
“No, I am sorry, I wish you didn’t have to deal with me.” He closed his eyes to try and stop the flow.
“I don’t have to do anything, Lance. I’m here because I love you and because I want to be.” Shiro reached up and softly touched his Bond Bite scar. “I don’t take this lightly.”
Lance wiped his face with the back of his hand. “I can get back on antidepressants, if it’s- I mean, if that’s an option. But I… I’d really prefer not to. They make me sick sometimes and also,” he looked up at Shiro nervously before saying, “They lower my sex drive, by like, a lot.”
“Oh,” Shiro seemed surprised. “I mean, that’s fine. If they make you feel better that’s most important. But if you don’t want to take them – for any reason, not just sex, then you don’t have to.”
Lance nodded, “You’re right though, I need to do something. I feel like I’m going crazy in this room, but the more I stay here the less I want to leave. I’m just… not ready to face anyone else.”
“Lance, everyone on this ship loves you and cares about you so much. Hunk is beside himself, I’m pretty sure he’s baked over a thousand cookies by now.” Shiro squeezed his hand then.
Lance smiled briefly, “I know, I just… This whole thing, this whole experience. It’s been… really fucking awful.”
Shiro nodded, “Yeah, it has.”
“I just still need time. And maybe… I’ll talk to Coran and see what he suggests for, ya know, my brain.” He gestured upwards vaguely.
“Maybe we can… take a walk?” Shiro suggested. “Just you and me, avoid everyone else and get you out of this room for a bit?”
“Yeah, maybe.”
Despite the reticence in his voice, later that night after the Castle was asleep, Lance let Shiro lead him around the ship. Holding hands and chatting mindlessly, Lance focused on feeling normal. Or as close to normal as he’d ever felt.
A few days later Lance was curled in bed, he’d been trying to read a book on Shiro’s data pad – it turned out the Black Paladin had downloaded hundreds of them with Pidge’s help – but he couldn’t manage to focus long enough to follow the story. He kept having to start paragraphs over when he realized he’d been reading without comprehension.
Shiro rarely left him alone but Lance had insisted he go spend time in the training room. Lance was regretting that decision. He’d thought Shiro’s constant worrying presence was starting to feel overbearing but now that his Alpha was gone, Lance just wanted him to return as quickly as possible.
His hormones were still all over the place, he couldn’t make it more than a few hours without crying. He kept telling himself, it was only a miscarriage, as if the fact that his baby wasn’t far enough along to survive outside the womb made it better.
Miscarriage. Miscarriage. People had them all the time. They were less common after the first trimester, but they still happened. Now it had happened to him and he could pick himself up and move on, right?
But the thing was… Lance wouldn’t have had a miscarriage if it hadn’t been for the fight. If it hadn’t been for the risks he had taken. So really, it was more like murder wasn’t it? He had killed his daughter.
Lance stared at the ceiling, his eyes dry for once, as he thought about the ways he could have done things differently. There was a knock at the door and he looked up, nervous.
Shiro wouldn’t knock, and Lance held his breath, waiting for the visitor to identify themselves.
“Can I come in?” It was Keith.
Lance sat up suddenly, pulling the duvet up to cover himself, regardless of the fact that he was fully dressed in a short sleeve tee shirt and Shiro’s grey sweatpants.
“Uhm,” Lance licked his lips, anxious. “Sure.”
The door slid open and revealed the man who had flipped his life upside down. Keith walked in slowly, looking around before pulling the chair at Shiro’s desk closer to the bed, straddling it with his chest to the back.
Lance watched all of this, wide-eyed, and also slightly weirded out by how at ease Keith seemed in Shiro’s room.
Their room.
“How are you feeling?” Keith asked, once it became obvious Lance was not going to say something first.
“I’m fine,” it was clipped and too fast.
Keith gave him a knowing look, but Lance remained silent until he said, “Does Shiro know you’re here?”
“Maybe?” Keith’s eyes looked strained, “Probably not. I can, uh- leave, if you want? Or uh, go get him?”
“Why are you here Keith?” Lance noticed then how tired his voice sounded.
“I just… needed to see you.” He looked away, as if nervous. “I wanted to make sure you were okay. There was so much blood, and I just- I keep dreaming about it. I’m sorry, it’s selfish of me to come see-“
Lance held up his hand to stop the rambling.
“I’m fine, really,” Lance told him. “I mean, physically, everything is okay.”
“And not physically?”
Lance was immediately annoyed with the gentle tone of voice. It was so not Keith it made him sick.
“What do you want to hear? That I’m back to normal, happy, peppy Lance?! My daughter is dead and it’s my fault. Obviously, I’m not going to be jumping for joy anytime soon.”
“Whoa, Lance,” Keith looked alarmed, “No one expects you to be over what happened. And it wasn’t your fault, are you insane? It was an accident.”
“An accident that I could have avoided,” Lance spat, the familiar wetness in his eyes only making him angrier.
“It could have happened from anything, you could have tripped and fallen in the hallway. You can’t torture yourself with how you could have done things differently.”
“But it didn’t,” Lance replied, wiping his eyes. “Why are you even talking to me right now? Let’s just go back to ignoring each other, it was a lot easier.”
“No,” Keith’s voice was firm. “You were right, I shouldn’t have ignored you after what happened, and I won’t do that again. You’re my friend Lance, whether you like it or not.”
Lance rolled his eyes and huffed, “We’re not friends.”
“I thought we were friends,” he looked hurt.
“Oh, is that why you snuck into my heat nest to fuck me?” Lance wanted to make him hurt more.
The Red Paladin didn’t look amused. “Are you going to throw that in my face every chance you get?”
“Maybe.”
“That’s fair, I guess.” Keith sighed.
Lance made a face, “Ugh, it’s not fun if you go along with it.”
“Fun is not the word I would use to describe any of this conversation.” Keith pressed the heel of his hands into his eyes.
Lance laughed at the sight and Keith pulled his hands away at the noise, surprise written across his face.
“My baby is dead,” Lance said matter-of-factly, “I’m never going to get over it. Ever. Even if, one day, I get pregnant again and have a baby, I will always have the memory of the first time I felt her move in me.”
Keith was holding his breath.
“But I will eventually be able to make it through the day without crying, I hope…”
“You will,” Keith said.
“I guess I can look at the bright side of all of this. I have Shiro now and I no longer have a crush on you, thank God.”
“You had a crush on me?” Keith sat back, surprised.
“For real? How do you make it through life this oblivious, are you just always lost?”
Keith made a face at the scathing tone, “You didn’t know Shiro was in love with you, so don’t even start.”
“Uhm, yeah! Have you seen Shiro? Would you ever think he’d like me?!” Lance threw his hands towards the hall, as if Shiro might come through at any moment.
“Alright, good point,” Keith agreed and Lance leaned back, ready to inform Keith he wasn’t supposed to agree, but he caught the gleam in the other man’s eye and before he knew it he was giggling.
Lance’s laughter surprised Keith briefly but he recovered quickly and then he was laughing as well, his shoulders shaking in shared giddiness.
Eventually it tapered off and Lance couldn’t help the blush on his face. It had been awhile since he’d laughed, and here it was Keith of all people causing it.
“Stop being likable, it’s weird,” Lance told him.
“I am likable,” Keith insisted, and Lance merely rolled his eyes.
“Get out of here before my boyfriend comes back and beats you up again,” Lance leaned over and pushed on his arm.
Keith stood up, but he was still smiling when he said, “I honestly wouldn’t put it past Shiro right now, he’s been on one.”
“Yeah?”
At Lance’s concerned face, Keith hurried to say, “I mean, he’s just been worried. We all are…”
Lance shrugged, and when it became clear he wasn’t going to say anything else, Keith walked back to the door, a soft “See you, Lance,” thrown over his shoulder.
Lance released a deep breath and laid back in bed. That wasn’t terrible. Maybe one day they could all get back to where they had been before.
They just needed to take it one day at a time.
+
“All you do is take this little capsule, once a week, and you should feel right as rain!” Coran handed Lance a little tin full of soft green gel caps.
“And I won’t have any weird side effects? Like…” Lance blushed, still incredibly uncomfortable discussing sex in front of Coran, despite the fact that the man had literally had his hands inside him only a few months prior.
“Well of course we can’t be sure of that, but so far all of our Altean medicine has worked perfectly on you Earthlings! Side effects are minimal, and certainly nothing like what you described to me before, the nausea or lack of appetite, or Altea forbid, the sexual-“
“Okay Coran! Got it!” Lance cut him off.
Coran laughed and continued, “If you do feel odd or anything unusual occurs, just let me know! We can always try something else.”
Lance looked down at the tin and back up, “Coran, I can’t thank you enough. For everything.” He hesitated for a moment before throwing his arms around the man, jostling them both precariously for a moment.
“No need to thank me, Blue.” Coran said primly – he was blushing though. “And maybe we can look into some other medication that you might benefit from…”
At Lance’s confused face he continued, “Such as birth control?”
“Oh!” Lance’s face flooded with color. “Uhm, yeah, that would… probably be a good idea. I’m fine now, I mean, I can’t get- You know, only during my heat, so-“
“Well whenever you need, just let me know, I’m sure we can figure something out!” Coran beamed.
“Right, uh- Thanks again,” Lance scrambled to leave the room, content to never discuss his sex life with another Altean again. Or until his next heat rolled around – it was going to be a good chunk of time before Lance was ready to do the pregnancy thing a second time.
Lance headed into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water to down one of the gel capsules Coran had given him. It was kind of nice that he only had to worry about them once a week instead of everyday.
He was considering the likeliness of forgetting and whether he should set a weekly reminder when Shiro walked in.
“There you are,” that soft smile Lance loved. Shiro moved close and pressed a kiss to his mouth. “Everything go okay with Coran?”
“Yeah,” Lance leaned against the Alpha, winding his arms around his waist. “All good.”
Shiro placed his hands on either side of Lance’s face and tilted his head back to kiss him more easily. “I’m glad,” he said between kisses. “Hey, guess what Pidge found for me?”
Lance struggled to follow Shiro’s words through the increasingly sloppier kisses, he hummed questioningly when he realized the other man had asked him a question.
“A download of The Shining,” he pushed his tongue between the Omega’s lax lips, winding his fingers through soft hair as they made out.
“Ooh!” Lance cooed, letting himself be petted and kissed, eating up the attention.
“Don’t you guys have a bedroom, or like… any other room that we don’t make food in?” Pidge asked as she walked in, Keith trailing behind her.
“They’re on a mission to do it in every room of the castle,” the Red Paladin dead panned.
“And your room is next, Keith!” Lance replied, lightning fast.
Pidge and Keith pantomimed vomiting at the same time, which had them both cracking up.
Shiro rolled his eyes at the two of them, turning back to Lance, “Anyway…”
“Well, you gonna read me my favorite book or just talk about it?” Lance hooked his fingers into Shiro’s pants.
“Maybe I want you to read to me?” Shiro replied, voice low.
Lance raised his eyebrow, “Ooh, switching it up, kinky.”
Shiro laughed and grabbed his hand, leading them both out of the kitchen and towards the room they shared.
Lance laid against Shiro’s side, the Alpha’s fingers tracing slowly over his Bond Bite scar as he read the first page of The Shining.
Life after losing his baby would never go back to the way it had been, his former concept of normal lost over time. But his current life, this new normal, it was pretty great. Better, even.