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I was nervous; there was no denying that, after all, I had never done this before. But overriding the nervousness, making it just a trilling murmur beneath the roar of other thoughts was excitement. I knew that my life was about to change, and I knew that I had made the right choice. He loved me, I knew that, and I loved him, I was sure of that, too. Everything would be perfect. I wasn't completely innocent, but this was a whole new world for me. Everything had taken on that brightness that accompanies new love. Adrenaline coursed through my veins as I awaited his arrival. The room was small, just barely enough room for the bed and a dresser, but I knew that we wouldn't be needing much space. After all, it was just the two of us. I tucked my bag neatly beneath the bed and sat down to wait.
Before long I heard his key in the lock, and I felt my heart jump. Somewhere in the time that I had been waiting doubts had crept into my mind. They must have shown on my face, because when he looked at me he laughed, "What's this?" he'd said, "my blushing bride?" At that point I did indeed blush, and he laughed again. "Don't be so worried, I'm not going to hurt you. I won't even rush you, we'll take our time." His voice got really soft and gentle then as he sat down next to me, "I know you're nervous, I am too. Just because I've done this before doesn't really make it any easier."
I nodded mutely, waiting for him to make the first move, too many possible words choking my voice in my throat. He took off his jacket and draped it across the dresser, he moved so smoothly, not once betraying the nervousness he had just admitted to me. "Stop looking so scared- everything will be fine." Again, all I could do was nod. He sighed and took my hand, pulling me to him. I didn't resist; I followed his movements seamlessly, curling against his chest as he enfolded me in his arms. Now it was my turn to sigh as I felt my nerves settle, he was right, everything would be fine. He just held me for awhile, slowly stroking my hair and brushing light kisses against my face. Then, when I was completely at ease, I looked up at him, unspoken questions in my eyes. He cupped my jaw in his hand and lowered his mouth to mine.
What an amazing feeling! His lips barely brushed my own at first, tickling me, grazing my mouth. It sent little waves of sensation radiating out over my jaw line, down my neck, settling at the base of my spine. I gasped in pleased shock; he had never kissed me like this before. I felt rather than saw him smile... the texture of his lips changed ever so slightly with the change in his expression. The velvet caress turning into the touch of silk against bare skin. But he didn't increase the pressure, still barely touching my mouth, almost as if he was kissing air, he moved his lips against my own. The little waves got stronger and I leaned into the kiss, wanting more.
Now I was kissing him, sliding my lips firmly across his, snaking my hands up his back and into his hair. He shuddered as I brushed my fingertips across the back of his neck, so I did it again, liking the way he reacted to my touch. His grasp tightened and he darted his tongue between my lips, tasting me. I reacted in kind, our tongues dancing against one another, exploring each other's mouths. The kiss became deeper, more passionate, more intimate. I loved it! I loved the feelings coursing through my body. I loved the way he felt against me. I never wanted the kiss to end. It felt so right to be held by him.
His hands slid up and down my back slowly, feeling every muscle, every inch of me as if he wanted to commit me to memory. I still had one of my hands laced in his hair, the other tracing playful patterns in the short bristly hairs at the back of his neck, so different from the soft silk of the rest of his hair. I arched my back against him and tipped my head back, allowing him more access to my mouth, wanting the kiss to become even deeper. His hands clenched at my shoulders and his mouth became more insistent. I was being wrapped in a haze of desire, and I found that our clothes were becoming a barrier. Leaving his hair, my hands hurriedly tore at the hidden buttons of his short blue shirt. Finally, I had undone enough of them to slip my hands underneath the soft fabric. His skin was warm to the touch, smooth and flushed with his growing passion. He moaned against my mouth as I thoughtlessly dug my fingertips into the bare flesh of his shoulders.
He pulled his mouth away from mine, ending our kiss, and gazed down into my eyes, his own smoky from the impact of our kiss. "Still nervous?" he asked huskily. Biting my lips slightly, I shook my head. "Still need to go slow?" He took my hand and kissed my palm, searching my face for an answer.
I was confused; I wanted to be with him, but I was enjoying the pace we were moving at. I was trying to formulate a response through the haze of desire in my brain when he nodded, "Ok, we'll just see what happens. Kiss me again," the last was a throaty demand I happily obliged. This time the kiss had none of it's earlier tenderness. His lips crushed mine with a desperate need and I responded in kind. I clenched him to me as little moans and gasps escaped us and I felt myself being backed towards the bed. The mattress nudged me gently at the back of my knees, and I felt his strong arms support me as he lowered me to the bed.
Still kissing me, he stretched out over me, supporting most of his weight on one knee. He propped himself up on his elbow and pushed my long hair out of my face. "You look so incredible with your lips swollen from my kisses and your eyes dancing with passion," he whispered huskily, "Are you sure you're ready for this?"
"Positive," I answered, not recognizing my own voice. I tried to pull his face to mine so that I could kiss him again and prove my words, but instead he began to trail little nibbling kisses along my jaw. My breath caught and I unconsciously craned back my head to allow him a better angle. He chuckled against my skin at my innocent reaction, but didn't stop. I couldn't believe how good such a simple touch could feel. My skin felt like it was on fire. My head swam, and I couldn't stay still. I squirmed against him mindlessly, wanting more contact. He slid one of his hands to the base of my throat and found the buttons to my crumpled shirt, beginning to undo them. He continued to kiss and nuzzle my neck as I writhed against him. His mouth found my earlobe and I moaned aloud with pleasure as I felt the damp fire of his tongue dart to the sensitive spot nestled behind it. He sucked and nibbled at the lobe until I was nearly mindless with pleasure and anticipation. Suddenly my focus shifted. From wanting only to bask in his attentions, now I wanted to return some of the pleasure he had already given me.
I pushed him back onto the bed, tearing my open shirt from my body as I climbed atop him. He sat up to kiss me and I used the opportunity to peel his shirt off of him and press his broad chest against my slighter frame. The feel of our flesh touching was electric, we both shuddered at the shock. Somewhere along the way my ponytail had come undone, my hair spilling out, brushing my shoulders and I had lost my glasses, so the room had taken on a soft fuzziness from my blurred vision, matching the pleasant haze I felt. Usually I felt uncomfortable without the augmentation to my vision but this time I felt that it fit, somehow. That sharp lines and clear focus would only detract from the magical feel of the evening. I splayed my hand on his shoulder and gently shoved him back onto the bed. The cheap bedspread was coarse against my skin as I stretched out beside him. Unlike him, I had yet to reach my full height and he was considerably taller than I. I nestled easily into the crook of his arm, drawing twirling patterns over the deep sheen of his skin. I found one of the piercings he wore and raised myself up to gently kiss him there. He gasped at the contact, arching into the slight pressure. I smiled softly and tugged gently on the cool metal ring with my teeth. I heard his quick intake of breath and felt his hand clutch at my shoulder. "You like that?" I murmured against him.
"God yes," he hissed back, "don't stop." I sucked at the pierced nipple for a while, relishing in the heady rush of giving him pleasure. He trembled and shuddered, clenching at me randomly.
I swung my leg over his hips and slid across his chest, repeating my attentions on the other nipple and its ring. His hands slid over my back and pressed me to him firmly. He moaned deeply and whispered half-finished, fragmented endearments to me. I liked the feeling of power I got from being able to make him react this way. It was flattering and intoxicating, almost as powerful as the pleasure I derived from his touch. Suddenly he shifted his weight and I found myself pinned to the bed under his larger frame. His blue eyes bore down on my own, almost luminous in the dim light. Even through the blurry haze that was my natural vision I could see the cold fire dancing in their depths. "I never figured you for such a delightful tease Hyu-" he half growled before crushing my mouth in a desperate kiss.
His hand trailed down my side and over my hips, he slipped one finger into the waistband of my pants and dragged it along until he found the fly. My heart stopped, I knew that there was no turning back now. This was already further than we had ever gone before, and I was starting to feel like we were skipping a major section of advancement in our rush to be together. When my pants were undone he surprised me by simply resting his hand on my hip under my clothes. It occurred to me then that he could always tell when I was starting to feel nervous and was adjusting his pace to keep me relaxed.
He began to trail gentle nibbling kisses over my chest and abdomen, exploring me in no real pattern. I grasped at the bed sheets in an attempt to stay still beneath his fiery touch; trying, and always failing to predict where his soft mouth would touch me next. I knew I was already covered in a thin sheen of sweat as I thrashed helplessly against the bed. I felt overheated and flushed, my breath coming to me in ragged gasps. I barely registered him slowly sliding my pants down over my hips and legs, until I felt the welcome coolness of the air-conditioned room against my legs. He slowly kneaded my thighs, working from the outside of my hip, down to my knees and back up my inner thigh. I was near mindless with pleasure at this point but it was not lost on me that he was carefully avoiding contact with certain areas.
I felt the heat of his tongue teasing my belly button and I shuddered at the surprising sensation. He held my hips firmly to keep me still as he nibbled along the sensitive skin at the top of my thigh. I wanted to scream for him to stop; I wanted to beg that this feeling would never end. I couldn't speak, I couldn't think, I was completely overwhelmed by the waves of reaction that buffeted through me.
When I felt his mouth enclose me, the intensity that racked my body actually did wrench a scream of pleasure from my throat and I unconsciously bucked my hips towards the source of this new heaven. I expected to become used to this new level of pleasure, as I had every other, but as he slid his tongue over and around the sensitive head, I realized that I could never keep up with the sensations that I felt. I was no longer in control; I wasn't just enjoying this anymore. My body had abandoned my mind, taking control, pushing any doubts, any nervousness far out of reach. I was acting purely on instinct and pleasure now. Something raw and primitive surfaced in me, and any trace of the rather shy, bookish young man he knew was summarily erased by this new drive to please and be pleased. I screamed, I gasped, I moaned, I couldn't believe it was my own voice I heard echoing through the room, but I knew that it was. I reached down and grasped his hair, guiding his movements as best I could. My hips moved of their own accord, striving to match the pace he set with his mouth and lips and tongue. I could feel the tension building within me as he sucked expertly on my cock.
I gasped in surprise as I felt him gently ease one fingertip into me. His hand was slick with something, and when I opened me eyes I could barely make out the small tube that lay beside me on the bed. I had no idea where it had come from, but I was glad he had thought to bring it, I had completely forgotten. The sensation was unusual, not exactly painful, not exactly pleasant-only slightly uncomfortable. It was quickly forgotten as his mouth continued its ministrations and I was caught up once more in pleasure. I was grateful that he was taking the time to stretch me, I had known that this would be painful for me and the knowledge had played a large part in my earlier nervousness. I should have trusted him more.
The intensity of my reactions surprised me; I was not a virgin. I had been with girls before. Breeding was encouraged among the slave class, especially after the plague had wiped out so many of us. As one of the few survivors, I had been encouraged (almost to the point of being pressured) to 'mate' with as many girls as possible. I certainly had more experience than people assumed upon meeting me, but I had never reacted this strongly before. This was hardly comparable to the nervous fumbling of the young slave girls, or the slightly bored actions of the more experienced women I had been with. The intellectual monologue that normally guided my actions in intimate moments had forsaken me. I was being dragged along by my body's intense needs. I felt a raw drive that I had never experienced before, and its intensity was slightly frightening. I didn't like the feeling of not being in complete control, if I didn't trust Sigrd so much- But I did trust him, and the pleasure I was feeling far outweighed the uneasiness I felt in my own abandonment.
I was being tossed about by waves of ecstasy; completely powerless to do anything to control how quickly I was responding to the attentions of my lover. Things were moving much too quickly, and I felt a strong desire to prolong the pleasure. If he didn't stop what he was doing soon, this interlude would be over before it ever really got started. I tried to tell him to slow down but my mouth wouldn't form the words properly, I would have been shocked if he had been able to decipher the broken words and moans and gasps that fell from my lips. Finally, I pushed at his head desperately, dragging his mouth back to mine. My mouth devoured his; I kissed him with the full force of my passion and need. My hands tore at the waistband of his pants, pushing the offending clothes from his hard body. He seemed surprised and more than a little pleased with the shift in my nature, relinquishing control to me happily.
It was his turn to be pushed back onto the tangled bed sheets. Mindlessly I ran my hands over his body. My fingers tore at the hard planes of his chest, the chiseled curve of his hips. He arched against my hands, my mouth, as his body trembled and shuddered beneath my fevered touch. I slipped my hand between his legs, cupping him intimately and he moaned loudly against my mouth. I ran my hand over his hard cock, reveling in the way he clutched at me in response; exploring the full length of him. Tearing my lips from his, I stared into his incredible blue eyes silently. His breath caught and he rolled his eyes upward unconsciously, clenching the rumpled sheets in his fists until his knuckles turned white. I smiled at him and maneuvered to lightly trace the head of his cock with my tongue. He cried out. I repeated the motion, a little more slowly this time. He shook, biting down on his lip, hard. I grazed my moistened lips over him in a feather-light touch. His hips strained upwards, trying to increase the pressure. "Tease," he ground out through clenched teeth.
Arching one eyebrow at him, I captured his full-length in mouth, amazing myself that I didn't gag. I began to work my lips and jaw lightly against him, creating suction and a rhythmic squeezing. Glancing up I saw that his eyes had gotten huge with shock and pleasure. I felt a swell of pride and self-satisfaction at his response. "Where the hell did you learn to do that?" he demanded breathlessly. I couldn't help it, he sounded so astounded that my lips stretched into a broad smile and I chuckled, with him still enclosed in my hot mouth. "Oh god!" he gasped as he drove deeper into my mouth and he buried his hands in my hair. Roughly he guided my movements with his clenched, trembling hands; moving his hips against me. I had never seen him like this. He was always so self-assured, so confident. It always seemed that he had complete control of every situation. To see him tremble, see the need in his eyes, hear the helplessness in his voice as he cried out, was novel. To know that I could do this to him was intoxicating.
"You have to stop," he panted, "it's too much- you have to stop." Blissfully I ignored his pleas; I was enjoying being able to return the torturous pleasure he had already given me. I knew all too well how overwhelming these sensations were, and I refused to deny him (or myself), the full range of them. "I- I- slow down, Hyu," he begged, "this... this is... oh god!" Suddenly he was moving. He wrenched himself free of me, a desperate groan echoing through the small room. He scooped me up and flipped me onto my back, crushing my mouth to his. He kissed me savagely, biting my lower lip and thrusting his tongue deeply into my mouth. His hands grasped my hips firmly, moving them into position beneath him.
"I wanted to take it slow- for you," he rasped as his hands fumbled for the little tube of lubricant, "I didn't expect you to be such an evil tease." He was nipping at my jawline as he tore the words from his throat, blindly groping for the tube entangled in the bedclothes. He had both of my arms pinned above my head with one of his strong arms, my hips held in place by the weight of him on top of me. Every inch of my body hummed with anticipation of what was to come. I felt him shift his weight and then I felt the shocking coolness of the slippery substance between my legs, not yet warmed by the heat of his hand as he prepared me for entry. I gasped as his finger slid effortlessly into to me.
First one- then two- he was stretching me to accommodate him. I had expected the discomfort; but as I relaxed, caught up in the sweet tingle of his rough kisses at my throat I was surprised by the little waves of pleasure radiating from somewhere deep inside me; little rhythmic throbs of sensation coaxed into being by his careful movements. I began to squirm against him, wanting more of the tantalizing pleasure he was giving me. My legs kicked helplessly against the bed as I strained to move my hips upwards. It was useless; my hips were still pinned beneath him, immobilized.
He slipped his fingers free of me, catching my disappointed little gasp with his lips as he kissed me again. He maneuvered between my trembling legs and caught my eyes with his. "I promise I won't hurt you any more than I have to," he whispered as he slowly guided himself into me. I nodded mutely, letting his moan of pleasure fill my ears, as I felt myself stretching, the discomfort growing until it became pain. God, the pain. It was blinding, searing and I tried to squirm away from it; pushing at the bed with my heels, futile attempts to wriggle my way back up the bed and away from the fiery pain. He stroked my hair and lay very still, whispering soft comforting words in my ear, punctuating them with gentle kisses. "Shhh... don't move," he instructed, "just relax... tensing up only makes it worse... that's it, relax... it'll pass, I promise."
I really tried to listen to him; I willed myself to relax, to stay still, and to trust that this would pass. But I couldn't help it, my body insisted that I make the pain stop, right now. Little whimpers escaped my tightly clenched mouth as I writhed mindlessly, trying to get away from the pain.
"Hyuga..." he whispered, "you have to stop. Stop squirming like that, please." There was an odd tinge to his voice, "I'm trying to take it slow and you're making that very difficult right now."
I didn't understand what he was saying. I should have known, but I was so distracted by the protestations of my body that I didn't comprehend the effect my wriggling was having on him. So, when he began to move, I thought he was stopping, I thought that he was giving up. My disappointment with my reaction was mixed with my relief that the pain would end. He pulled almost completely out of me, slowly, before, just as slowly, thrusting against me. What?? I froze in place. I couldn't believe it, didn't he know how much this hurt? He groaned loudly, as he struggled to keep his pace slow and gentle.
"I know, it hurts... but it'll get better, I promise. Please, please, trust me Hyuga..." he pleaded apologetically as he tenderly wiped away the few tears that had squeezed out of my eyes.
I felt betrayed, trust him? He knew that I was hurting, and he knew how to make it stop, but he wouldn't. I was so caught up in my pain and outrage that it took me a few minutes to notice that the pain was indeed easing off. It still hurt, but those tingling little waves of sensation I remembered were coming back, taking the edge off of the stinging pain. Gingerly, tentatively, I began to rock against him, testing the new sensation. It didn't take long for the pleasure to completely erase any trace of my previous pain, and along with it, any mistrust or anger I had ever had towards my lover. I threw my arms around him as we moved together, rejoicing in the new pleasures he had introduced me to.
"Better?" he asked as I cried out beneath him, a playful smile on his face.
"Yes... oh yes!" I gasped in response. He kissed me then, lightly.
"Thank god!" he groaned as he lost all gentleness and slammed into me. He became fierce in his movements, setting a strong, fast rhythm, forcing me to keep up with him. My cock was trapped between our slick, sweat drenched bodies, sliding effortlessly against the hot skin of his stomach. The pleasure I felt was overwhelming; I could feel how close I was to coming and prayed that I would survive it. This was the most intense experience I had ever had, and I knew that my orgasm would make everything I had experienced up to this point pale by comparison.
His hands found mine and we laced our fingers together, desperately clinging to each other as we made love. I lost track of all the endearments we whispered to each other, all of the kisses we shared. When I finally came I was staring into his eyes, our faces so close I could taste his breath as it whispered across my parted lips. I cried out and arched desperately against him, my body caught in an intense explosion of pleasure. I shook and trembled against him as he continued to drive deep inside me, refusing to let the shuddering aftershocks pass until he had reached his own orgasm. His face contorted and I felt him slam against me involuntarily. His jaws closed over the muscle and tendons just above my collarbone as his orgasm ripped through him. The pleasure I received from his strong bite surprised me and sent flurries of shaking little tremors through my body. We both lay entangled, gasping for breath and drenched in well-earned sweat, for some time.
Gradually, our breathing regulated and we became aware of the chill of the air-conditioned room against our damp skin. He rolled off of me, cradling me in his arms as he stretched out beside me. He silently plucked a couple of tissues from the box on the nightstand and tenderly began to clean us both up. I shuddered as the soft tissue swept over my still too sensitive skin. He smiled at me and brushed a kiss lightly against my swollen lips. I snuggled into him and stifled a contented yawn. The last thing I remember, through the soft haze of drowsiness, is the sound of his breathing and the feel of the cheap bedspread being flipped over me as sleep descended upon me.
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