Work Text:
“Jihoon, babe, wake up.” Jihoon groaned in annoyance. He shuffled further under the covers, away from the hand shaking his shoulder. “Don’t groan at me, mister. You are the one that told Cheollie-hyung you would meet him at 12 for lunch and work.” Jihoon huffed and swung his arm around to knock the annoying voice away. He smirked in sleepy satisfaction when his hand met with flesh. “Ouch, dammit Ji, quit abusing your boyfriend and get up. I made coffee.”
“Why didn’t you just say that from the beginning?” Jihoon grumbled.
“And here I thought my beautiful smile and face was enough to get you out of bed. You wound me, I am wounded. Somebody, alert the press.” Soonyoung cried, flopping back onto the bed dramatically. Jihoon bounced with the movement and let out a quiet laugh as he removed the covers from his face to stare at his boyfriend. “Hi.” Soonyoung said quietly, leaning in to kiss Jihoon softly.
“Hi.” Jihoon whispered back. It was moments like these that Jihoon still couldn’t believe were his to keep. These soft moments with Soonyoung, just quiet and existing next to each other. After years of pining and months of miscommunication that almost broke their relationship before it began. Here it is now, three months short of their one-year anniversary, and Jihoon has never been happier. He’s never really felt that he would ever make the words of his songs real, but then he met Soonyoung, and the rest became history.
“You thought wrong,” Jihoon said into the quiet, only continuing when he got Soonyoung’s confused look. “I only care about the coffee; your face holds no value to me.” His actions, he knew contradicted his words as he caressed Soonyoung’s face softly. His fingers automatically tracing the others lips as he smiled. Soonyoung nipped playfully at his fingers, laughing as he sat up. He smacked Jihoon’s ass through the covers. He laughed again as he dodged Jihoon’s kick.
“Seriously, get up. I don’t want to listen to Hyung whine about you always being late for your dates.”
Jihoon sat up and glared at his smirking boyfriend. “What the fuck? They are not dates!” Jihoon threw a pillow as Soonyoung laughed his way out of the room. He shook his head, smiling as he got out of the bed. After finishing in the bathroom and getting dressed he walked into the living room to find the other on the couch texting. His cup of coffee sitting next to Jihoon’s. Jihoon placed a small kiss on Soonyoung’s cheek as he grabbed his cup. “Who are you texting?’
Soonyoung lifted his head and smiled at Jihoon. “Channie, he wanted to know what time we were supposed to be meeting at the dance studio.” Jihoon hmmed in acknowledgement as he sipped the coffee. “We are choregraphing for the competition in six months.” Soonyoung continued, putting his phone down and turning to look at Jihoon.
Jihoon raised an eyebrow, “You’re being weird.” He muttered as Soonyoung just continued to stare at him. Jihoon averted his eyes as he felt his face begin to flush with the attention.
“I know,” Soonyoung smiled impishly before pressing a light kiss to Jihoon’s lips. Jihoon let his eyes wonder over Soonyoung’s body when the other stood up and stretched. “I’m gonna go get ready.” Soonyoung muttered as he scratched his stomach. Jihoon nodded as he pulled out his own phone and texted Seungcheol that he was fixing to leave to head to the Studio. He stood up, taking both empty coffee cups to the kitchen and settling them into the sink after rinsing them. He checked to make sure he had everything as he made his way to the door.
“I’m leaving.” Jihoon called back over his shoulder towards the back of the apartment.
“Okay, be safe. Tell Cheollie-hyung hi for me.” Soonyoung called back from the direction of their room.
“Okay! See ya later!” Jihoon said, opening the door.
“Bye, I love you.” Soonyoung called sticking his head out the bedroom door. Jihoon froze in the open doorway. He turned and looked at Soonyoung who was walking towards him with a small smile.
“That’s, uh, that’s um…nice.” Jihoon finished lamely.
Soonyoung laughed, “It is.” He leaned down pressing a soft kiss to Jihoon’s lips. “You better get going, or you’re going to be late.” Jihoon nodded dumbly as he turned and walked out the door, with Soonyoung shaking his head at him as he closed the door.
Jihoon was so out of it, that he didn’t even register that he made it to the studio. He was still staring at the dark computer screen when Seungcheol walked in and waved his hand in front of Jihoon’s face.
“Uh, Ji, you okay there?” Seungcheol asked, poking Jihoon’s shoulder slightly. Jihoon looked at Seungcheol with wide eyes.
“He said he loves me.” He said instead of answering Seungcheol’s question.
Seungcheol stared at him blankly, still not getting it. “Um, what?”
Jihoon groaned and let his head fall onto the desk. “Soonyoung said he loved me this morning.”
“I’m still not getting it, Ji. You guys have been friends since your freshman year in college, been living together for two of those years, and have been dating for almost a year, I’m sure he’s said it before.” Seungcheol said.
Jihoon looked up at Seungcheol and grimaced. Seungcheol slowly started to get an uneasy feeling. “This isn’t the first time either of you said it right?” He asked.
“Um…”
“Jihoon!” Seungcheol yelled, disbelief flavoring his tone.
“What? I was shocked, okay! I wasn’t expecting it.” Jihoon cried, running his hands through his hair.
Seungcheol sat up and looked at Jihoon in shock. “Not expecting it? Ji, you’ve been in love with Soonyoung since you’ve met him.”
“Not helping.” Jihoon cried out.
Seungcheol took a deep breath calming down, “Okay, okay, so when he said he loves you, what did you say back?” Jihoon grimaced again and looked away from Seungcheol. “Jihoon?” He asked again.
Jihoon groaned loudly, “I said that’s nice.”
Seungcheol actually whimpered, “That’s nice?! What the hell Jihoon?”
“What? I was stunned and froze.” Jihoon yelled, standing up and started pacing the studio room.
“What did he say after that?” Seungcheol was almost too afraid to ask.
“He said it was and then told me I was going to be late in meeting you.” Jihoon muttered, biting his thumb nail as he paced. Seungcheol looked up at the ceiling as if asking it what he was supposed to do or say. “It’s going to be fine, right?” Jihoon asked, still pacing. “I mean, I didn’t say it back, but Soonie knows, right? He knows that I love him.” Jihoon said freaking out looking at his Hyung for help.
Seungcheol sighed, grabbing Jihoon as he paced by and dragged him into his arms on the couch. “First, breathe. I need you to breathe. It’s going to be fine.” He said hugging the younger one to him. He remembered how much the two went through to get together. Between the two of them, they had two failed relationships. One of them being Jihoon and Seungcheol’s own failed attempt at something more than best friends. They overcame Jihoon’s emotionally constipated self, who didn’t do casual relationships. They overcame Soonyoung’s extreme trust issues who had given up on relationships and therefore only did casual hookups. Seungcheol remembered how their group of friends struggled to survive throughout the tension between them whenever they were in the same room with each other.
“What if I messed everything up?” Jihoon asked quietly. “This is the first time he’s said I love you since that asshole almost broke him.”
“But he didn’t break him, Soonyoung is one of the strongest people I know. And you helped him put himself back together, for himself.” Seungcheol said.
“What if he doesn’t think I love him?” Jihoon whispered his fear out loud. “It took him forever to even trust me, not even including being comfortable with the two of us being friends when he found out we used to date. Even if you just started dating Jeonghan and Shua-hyungs.”
“But he did, he knows that we are best friends only, regardless of our past, Ji. He trusts you and he even trusts me. He knows, Ji, he knows you love him.” Seungcheol replied, “Calm down and call him. Call him now and tell him how you feel.”
“Isn’t this something I should say to his face though?” Jihoon asked, sitting up and grabbing his phone.
“Who cares? I’m sure he won’t care.” Seungcheol said, going quiet as Jihoon was already pressing Soonyoung’s name to call.
Hey guys! Sorry, you’ve reached Soonyoung,
but I can’t come to the phone right now.
Please leave a message and I’ll
call you back as soon as possible.
Jihoon groaned, “He’s probably in the dance studio already. They are preparing for a big competition.”
“Okay, so go to him.” Seungcheol said, but Jihoon just sighed and shook his head.
“No, I don’t want to interrupt them in the middle of their choregraphing session. Let’s…let’s just work on the song. When he calls me back, I’ll tell him.”
“Are you sure?” Seungcheol asked.
“Yeah, besides, the company purchasing this song wanted it last week anyways.” Jihoon said, turning on his computer. “Into the booth you go. I already did the vocal guide, I just need you to help out with the rapping guide.” Seungcheol sighed as Jihoon tried to focus on work, but his eyes kept glancing at his phone, but honestly, he didn’t know what else to say to Jihoon to calm his fears.
What they both forgot, was that when they both entered working mode that they developed tunneled vision. Also, Jihoon forgot to take his phone off silent. Which he realized five hours later when they finished tweaking the song and deemed it finished and sent it in to the company. When he looked down at his phone he started cussing.
15 missed calls from Soonyoung
“Fuck, Fuck! Hyung! Soonyoung called and I missed it.” Jihoon yelled as he stared at his notifications. Staring at the one lone voicemail notifications from fifteen missed calls.
“Fuck, Ji, breathe dammit.” Seungcheol said, shaking the younger one harshly.
“He left a voicemail.” Jihoon said, his voice so small that Seungcheol had to strain to hear it.
“Listen to it,” Seungcheol particularly yelled. His own heart beating against his chest.
Jihoon pressed play letting the voice play on speaker.
“Ji, you must have your phone on silent again…”
Soonyoung sighed through the phone.
“Look, I don’t have much…”
Soonyoung’s voice muffled out as he moved the phone away from his mouth, when he came back he was already saying something different.
“…I knew that this would happen…”
Jihoon muffled a whimper as the voicemail abruptly cut off. He looked up with scared eyes at Seungcheol. “Fuck.” He muttered, his eyes stinging as tears sprung up to his eyes.
“No, no, no, none of that. Don’t think the worst.” Seungcheol demanded, looking sternly at the other.
“What did he know?” Jihoon asked.
“Come on, Jihoonie, think positive.” Seungcheol begged. “Go home,” He said looking at his watch, “it’s 5:30 pm, he should be home from the dance studio by six, right?” Wasn’t that one of the rules from the both of you? Both be home from the studios by six unless you told the other one otherwise before then.” Jihoon nodded slowly, eyes on his phone still. Seungcheol sighed, “Come on, you gotta give me something, Ji. You being this quiet is scaring me.”
“What if he isn’t there when I get home? What if he left?” Jihoon asked.
“The Soonyoung I know would never do that to you, besides the fact he said he loves you this morning, he would never be like that asshole.” Seungcheol firmly said, making sure to look in Jihoon’s eyes, to get him listen to him. Jihoon nodded and they quietly gathered their things and made their way out of the building. “Do you want me to go with you?” Seungcheol asked when they made it outside.
Jihoon shook his head, “It’s date night for you and the hyungs, no need to ruin your relationship too.”
Seungcheol brought him in for a one-armed hug, “You wouldn’t ruin our relationship, and you didn’t ruin yours. Call me if you need me, okay?”
Jihoon just nodded and waved bye as he hailed a cab. After giving the driver his address, he tried calling Soonyoung again, only to be sent straight to voicemail. Pulling up to their apartment, he thanked the driver and paid him. He slowly made his way to the apartment He held his key in his hand and took a deep breath, steeling himself he slipped the key into the lock and opened the door. He walked in and wanted to cry with when saw the apartment was still dark. Jihoon wanted to crumble with the sadness weighing him down. He closed the door and dropped his things in the middle of the hallway. He slowly made his way towards their room in the dark. His mind as blank as the dark apartment. He didn’t bother turning on any of the lights, just sitting on the end of the bed staring at the outline of the closed closet doors. He knew that to get the answer he wanted, all he had to do was open the closet. If Soonyoung’s clothes were still there, he still had a chance.
He still had a chance to tell Soonyoung that he loved him. He still had a chance to tell Soonyoung that he was Jihoon’s favorite thing in his life. He still had a chance to tell him that all his songs were about him. He still had a chance to tell him that Jihoon wouldn’t be who he was without Soonyoung being in his life. He still had a chance to tell him that Soonyoung was the reason for every smile on his face.
If his clothes weren’t there, then Jihoon knew he lost the one thing that meant the most to him. God, Jihoon thought, why couldn’t he just say that he loved Soonyoung too this morning. He continued to stare at the door of the closet, getting up and opening the doors seem like the hardest thing for him to do.
He jumped when he heard the front door open and a muffled curse of someone tripping over things on the floor.
“What the fuck? Why is it so dark? Ji, you home? Babe, why is your stuff in the middle of the floor?” Soonyoung called out, flipping on the lights. Jihoon didn’t wait, as soon as he heard his favorite voice in the world, he ran. He ran without thought, immediately jumping into Soonyoung’s arms. He held on tightly as the strong arms dropped everything he was holding and immediately clamped around him without hesitation.
“Whoa, hey, Ji. Baby, what’s wrong?” Soonyoung asked, concern laced in his voice. Jihoon said nothing, just breathing in Soonyoung’s scent. It was sweaty and earthy, with a faint smell of food and a scent that was purely Soonyoung. He pressed himself closer to Soonyoung who responded by picking him up and carrying him to the couch. Jihoon felt Soonyoung running his hands on his back in a comforting caress.
“Hoonie, you’re starting to scare me. What’s wrong?” Soonyoung asked quietly.
Jihoon took a deep breath and sat up in Soonyoung’s lap and stared into his eyes. “I thought you left.” He admitted quietly.
Soonyoung’s eyes widen in alarm, “What?!”
Jihoon hushed him with a quick kiss to his lips. “Let me explain.” Soonyoung nodded once, hands tightening onto Jihoon’s waist. “I thought you left because when you said you loved me this morning, I only said that it was nice.” He put his hand over Soonyoung’s mouth to keep him from interrupting. “I don’t know why I couldn’t just say that I love you too. Because, god, Soonyoung, I do. I love you so much. I love how you’re the reason I rush home every day. I love how you smile when you help someone without them realizing it was you. I love your laugh and how it automatically brightens up my bad days. I love you dance, showing the entire world how beautiful your soul is, letting everyone see what I think is the most beautiful thing in this world. I love your eyes, and how they hold my entire universe in them. I could get lost and never want to be found in them if it meant I could stay with you for the rest of my life.”
Jihoon talked, saying everything his heard had been dying to tell Soonyoung since the day he met him freshman year. With each declaration, he wiped Soonyoung’s tears away. “I love you, Kwon Soonyoung, and if that means that your face is the first thing I see every morning, nothing would ever make me happier.” He finished, pressing an innocent kiss to Soonyoung’s lips. He cradled his head to his chest as he waited for Soonyoung to collect himself.
“God, fuck, Jihoon.” I love you so much.” He said, his voice thick with tears. He looked up to meet Jihoon’s eyes. “I said I love you this morning, because I do. I love everything about you, Lee Jihoon. After the last time, I never knew whether I could trust someone with my heart, but you are the one I trust the most in this world. You made my heart whole again.” Soonyoung said hugging Jihoon tightly to him. They sat there together, holding each other, with Jihoon never leaving Soonyoung’s lap. Letting all their insecurities and fears ease out as they relaxed into each other’s arms.
Soonyoung broke the quiet first, “Not that I’m complaining, but what exactly brought all this on? Why did you think I was leaving you?”
“I was already freaking out about this morning and then I saw all your missed calls, and then your voicemail cut off with you only saying you knew this would happen.” Jihoon explained quietly.
Soonyoung chuckled quietly, “I forgot my phone charger this morning. My phone was dying when I was talking to your voicemail. I was calling to tell you I was going to be late coming home.” Jihoon looked at Soonyoung and shook his head. His body shaking as he tried to hold back his laughter. Jihoon started laughing, which caused Soonyoung to laugh with him. The next few minutes were them laughing at the situation and the overreactions to each other. Catching their breaths, Jihoon sat up and kissed Soonyoung until he was breathless again. The kiss quickly becoming heated as they poured their raw emotions for each other through the kiss. When they broke apart to breathe, Jihoon rested his forehead against Soonyoung’s and panted.
“I love you, Kwon Soonyoung, so much you wouldn’t believe.” Jihoon whispered.
“I love you, Lee Jihoon, you are the reason my heart beats again.” Soonyoung whispered in between peppering Jihoon’s face with kisses.
“Show me.” Jihoon said, watching as Soonyoung’s eyes darken with desire. Soonyoung stood up with Jihoon still in his arms and made his way to their bedroom.
It was the next morning before Jihoon remembered to text Seungcheol that all was well.