Chapter Text
He thinks it's Thursday. Maybe it was still Wednesday, but he's pretty sure it's been Thursday for a while. And while Valentine's Day wasn't usually his favourite day of the year, this year it's just grotesque. He looked through the gauzy curtains across the table from where he sat on Reid's sofa, and held his fourth or fifth cup of coffee in both hands.
"So, I've got a few more days off," he said, nodding like he's not sure if he's going to laugh or cry.
"Me too." Reid's been a little too quiet, and these are the first words he's said in a few hours.
"What the fuck," Langly said, for probably the fourteenth time in those hours, and it's still not a question.
"We're involved in a shooting. It's just neither of us took the shot." Chaz nodded like a bobblehead, like the motion was the only thing keeping him from doing something regrettable. "You get covered in someone else's brains, you get a few days off."
"You two sure you're okay?" Langly asked from the chair he'd dragged over to the end of the coffee table.
"We will be," Reid assured him, quietly. He looked down at his arm, eyeing the unbloodied bandages that were a souvenir of last week's case in Baltimore. "The stitches come out soon."
Chaz took one hand off his coffee and wrapped it around Reid's hand. "I'm sorry."
"It was the best answer we had. Given the circumstances, I'm less upset by your choices than I would have been if he'd pulled the trigger."
"I doubt you'd have had the time to be upset," Chaz pointed out, grimly. "I still shouldn't have--"
"You did. And now I know. And just like you've learned to live with it, so will I." Reid held tightly to Chaz's hand, a physical reassurance more compelling than anything else he'd been able to offer since Chaz slammed the door between them, in the aftermath.
"You, um... You're not...?" Langly eyed his boyfriend warily.
"No. Still not. I'm a little more useful than we thought, but I'm not anomalous." Reid shrugged. "I don't think I ever will be, unless I get a much better offer."
"There are no good offers," Chaz muttered into his cup.
"Yeah, if you're not by now, I'm not really sure what it would take," Langly admitted. "Though I think having a gun to your head in the presence of two gammas might have done it, for anyone else. But, you're you, and I like you, but you're kind of a freak. I like that, too."
Chaz caught a blip through the barrier between them, and wondered what Reid had just remembered so loudly. Probably not his business, given how fast it went away. He was relieved, though, that he could still hold Reid at bay at all after what they'd done. He cleared his throat and derailed the conversation. "In bed."
"He has a bed, now." Langly pointed at Reid. "And it's bigger than yours."
"I still prefer the chair, if I'm sleeping alone," Reid protested, absently rubbing his thumb across the back of Chaz's hand. They didn't need to be sharing thoughts for him to know how shaken Chaz still was by what had happened only a few hours ago, however long it felt. "If Duke asks, you slept on my couch."
"Obviously." Chaz slumped down on the sofa, tipping his head back. "He's sure you're anomalous."
"He's wrong."
"I know. You're definitely not the kind of anomalous he thinks you are." Chaz snorted. "He thinks you've got some kind of echolocation thing."
Reid looked stunned for about as long as it took the laugh to start. "He what?"
"He hasn't figured out that you only show signs of anomalous talents when you're with me. Mostly because he doesn't see you by yourself. It was the most reasonable explanation for how you managed to walk to the car with your eyes closed."
"That is not a reasonable explanation."
"You were talking for a lot of it. We were talking for a lot of it."
"And somehow this is more reasonable than the idea that I've worked in that building for years, and I'm pretty sure I could have done most of that blindfolded anyway? At least to the door." The faintly horrified smile that accompanied the laugh still hadn't faded. "Counting steps is much easier than counting cards."
Langly cut in. "Seriously? How much of the building can you do that with?"
"Only the parts I visit regularly, which leaves out several floors. Of course, the layouts of everything above ground level are fairly consistent, so even if I don't know what's on that floor, I probably do know where the walls are, if nothing else. Did discover I don't know where the bathrooms are on six, though."
"Behind the elevator," Chaz muttered.
"...That's a maintenance closet."
"Not on six!"
Reid shook his head. "Anyway, I could've made it as far as the door without help, but probably not to the car. And it wouldn't have been nearly as easy as we made it look."
Langly groaned loudly. "If you end up in Idlewood, out of all of us, I'm going to have some serious questions."
"It's not going to happen. Again, I'm not anomalous, and it's really unlikely that's going to change now," Reid argued, snatching up his coffee again. "And we've got other concerns with Duke, not that I think those concerns are going to manifest until he's determined how to wield them to the best effect."
"The picture was destroyed, Spencer. There's no way he figured out it was you."
"I don't know if you've noticed, recently, but we're not the same colour, and I've got wider ankles. Parts of the legs were still intact. And he was looking at me."
"Not like he can see your ankles," Langly pointed out, eyeing the overlong pyjamas Reid was still wearing. "And you're wearing the fluffy socks, anyway." He glanced over at Chaz. "I'll replace it."
Chaz sighed, still staring at the ceiling. "I don't know if you should. It's beautiful, and I'll miss it, but... A little difficult to hide something that big, you know?"
"Then I'll replace it better."
"If you're thinking about a digital frame, I'm just going to nix that, up front. Do you know what Hafs would do with a digital frame that big, across from my bed?"
"Whatever I do won't be wireless," Langly promised, after a moment's consideration. "Because never mind what she'd do to the picture, I'm more worried about what she'd do to me if she had to see it."
There was a long pause, before anyone spoke again, the hazy light at the windows brightening a touch.
"I don't think I'm ever going to get used to-- There are deaths you can look at, and they're not so bad. You do this job long enough, and you get used to dead people. You get used to seeing the worst things one person can inflict on someone else. You wind up with a strong stomach, at the very least. And exactly none of it prepares you to wear someone's brains from less than six inches away."
Langly swallowed hard, trying not to think too hard about it.
"I know," Reid said it quietly, but his voice carried weight in the silent room. "I wasn't as close, but I know."
"Jack wasn't a bad guy. I only knew him to nod to, but he was like any of us. And he never said a word to me about it. I don't think I ever caught him flirting... This was the last thing I expected. And I was so sure he was safe, when I looked away..."
"You know that not everyone handles the Anomaly as well as you do," Reid reminded him.
"I know, but... I didn't see it."
"Look, you met this guy at a club, right? Of course you didn't see it." Langly got up and tried to make his way around the far side of the table, to the kitchen, without tripping over anything. "You're expecting to get stared at. He's probably staring at you. It's not weird."
"No, I mean, he shot himself. I didn't see it." Chaz sat forward, leaning his elbows on his knees, twisting his hand out of Reid's. "I thought he was going to shoot one of us. When he started to move, he was going to shoot you."
"And then you stopped him." Reid rubbed his face, tiredly. "You're afraid you killed him, but I don't think you did. I think he saw something in your face, when you turned around, that he wasn't expecting, and it changed his mind."
"That I wasn't going to change my mind, if he killed you? That I love you?"
Langly leaned out of the kitchen, leaving the dishwasher open. "Uhh, excuse me?"
Chaz looked up at him, brow wrinkled in confusion, and then he remembered. "Right. You slept through that conversation. I love your boyfriend, but not like you do."
"You love him, you're boning him, where's the difference?" Annoyance crossed Langly's face. "You're not interested in a relationship, so of course, you fall in love with my boyfriend."
"No." Reid turned his head to look at Langly. "Not in love. Like Byers."
Langly's mouth shut so fast his teeth clicked, and he straightened up, blinking.
"We're almost inseparably part of each other. I don't want to say it was inevitable, because I know that's not true, but it was one of a fairly small number of likely outcomes. I care very deeply about Chaz, because he's part of me." Reid held out a hand to Langly, an embarrassed smile curving his lips. "You... I love you like Launcelot loved Guinevere. Completely, foolishly, and to the ends of the earth, whether or not it's a good idea."
"This the part where I'm supposed to yell at you for not getting on the god damn cart fast enough?" Langly shut the dishwasher with his knee.
"You remember that?"
"You always tell that one when you think I can't hear you."
"Not always. But, I do come back to it often." Reid ducked his head, eyes bright when he looked back up. "It's a reminder to myself of the lengths I would go to, for you."
"It's true." Chaz nodded sagely, glad the conversation had turned back away from him. "He kicked a guy in the face."
Reid shot him a pained look. "And that was neither good nor right, and is exactly the kind of thing I'm trying to avoid doing."
"It was an effort for me not to kick him again, for good measure," Chaz admitted, scratching at the tape holding the gauze on his neck.
Looking wryly up at Langly, Reid cleared his throat. "That's the kind of thing you're supposed to complain when I do."
Langly shrugged. "You complained enough about it without the help. I thought it was kind of hot."
Behind Reid, Chaz yawned despite himself. "You two should look at each other like that in front of Duke a few times. Pretty sure that'll clear up any questions he's got about me."
"As concerned as I am about his thoughts on our relationship, I'm interested to see his reaction once he figures out why I come off as anomalous. Eventually, he will figure out it's you, not me."
"I'm not looking forward to that. Falkner is going to have my head on a plate." Chaz slid sideways until his head rested on Reid's shoulder. "What was that about you having a bed?"
"You really think you're going to sleep?" Reid asked, resting his cheek against the top of Chaz's head.
"No, but I think I'm rapidly losing the ability to avoid the attempt."
"Come on, you can laugh at me when I don't open the door right, again."
"Wait, wait, wait," Langly argued, leaning against the doorframe. "Where's all that courtly love shit, now? He should have to open the door if he wants to use the bed."
Chaz squinted up at Langly, sure he'd missed something. "It's a door. I'm not that tired."
"Oh, come on, that is such a set up, and you know it." Langly stared intently at Reid and gestured at Chaz. "Isn't this the part where Sir Full Of Himself walks into the price for arrogance, and Lady Whoeverthefuck has to come save him from himself by feeding him completely cryptic clues?"
"You just want an excuse to make me play the part of Lady Whoever."
Langly's look turned coy. "Well, you did such a good job last time..."
"Last... time...?" Chaz looked even more confused than he'd started. "I feel like I should ask, and at the same time, I'm pretty sure I'm better off not knowing. One of us in a dress was enough, and you still have great legs."
"Yeah, I know." Langly glanced down at himself and rolled his eyes. "First step? Find the door."
Now, Chaz was sure they were fucking with him. "The door that's about ten feet behind the couch? That door?"
"Not this bedroom," Reid told him. "His bedroom."
"Your bedroom, my apartment," Langly argued.
"You took the one on the end, so it's that wall." Chaz gestured vaguely toward the wall in question. "If it's in the wall, it's a bookcase. Only two of them are big enough, so I'm guessing it's the one you just moved all the crap out from in front of."
Reid was glad Chaz wasn't in his head, right then, or he'd have felt the smile that didn't happen. "One way to find out, right? I'm going to tell you it's not a trick book, because I don't want to sit here all night while you try all of them."
"Yeah, we should probably get to bed sometime this year," Langly teased, leaning out to grab Reid's empty cup so he could add that to the dishwasher.
"Or you could just show me how the fucking door works, and we could go to bed now."
Reid could feel the change in the weight against his shoulder, and he knew if they didn't get up now, Chaz was probably going to pass out. Really, he was almost surprised they both hadn't dropped off an hour ago, but every time his eyes drifted shut, he could see the side of Jack's head disintegrate, and Chaz had been so much closer.
He looked up at Langly. "Go open the door. We'll be there shortly."
Langly spent another few seconds studying Chaz, slowly realising that he was nowhere near as okay as he'd been pretending, and he really hadn't looked that okay to begin with. "Are you sure you don't need a hand?"
"We're fine. Just get the door." Reid waited until Langly had crossed the room before he reached across himself to put a hand on Chaz's shoulder. "Come back to me," he said quietly.
"No. You don't need this." Chaz dragged himself to his feet, grateful when he didn't topple into Reid's lap. He hadn't really been awake that long, but the day they'd had weighed on him almost physically.
"You don't need it, either. You're afraid you killed him, but none of us were supposed to survive."
"You don't know that."
"Yes, I do. And if I know it, so do you, because you're how I know it. He meant--"
"And that's why I can't. I can't put you through what I went through. I had no right to use you like that, and there's a chance that if we do that again, you're going to--"
Reid stood up, nudging the coffee table out of his way, eyes bright and chin tipped up that half inch that put him eye to eye with Chaz. "How angry would you be if I'd had to shoot him with your gun? Because that's what we're talking about, here. You borrowed something of mine to save our lives, and maybe you didn't ask first, but it was my decision. You were having trouble, because you couldn't see him. I knew if I could get him to look me in the eye, you could. And he'd be distracted for a split second, because he was entirely focused on you, at that point. I made that decision, and I was really hoping you could follow that thought."
Chaz opened his mouth and Reid cut him off.
"Yes, I am sure that was my idea. If we could tell them what was happening, my team would tell you that was my idea, because that is exactly the sort of thing I do when I have a gun to my head, although at least once, possibly twice, the immediate danger to life and limb involved explosives. And do you know why I'm willing to make questionable decisions in the face of death? Because the only thing worse than dying is dying slowly and painfully, and I think we both know that. I know you know that, for almost the same reasons I do. We were going to die, and I offered you an easy way to stop that from happening, and if I haven't said it yet, thank you." Reid held up a finger as he stopped to breathe. "So, please. Come back to me. I've never been afraid of you, and I'm not going to start now, just because we've learned to do something new. There is not enough time in my life for that kind of fear."
"Spencer..." Chaz leaned down and took the kiss that wasn't quite being offered. "I can't. Not right now. Just let me put my head on." A laugh that was less humour than dismay slipped out. "I don't want you to see me like this."
And that, Reid understood all too well. "Come to bed. You need to sleep."
"So do you."
"I'll get there," Reid promised, slipping an arm around Chaz's waist and leading him toward the door, where Langly waited.
Chaz glanced down the wall. "I picked the wrong bookcase."
"And that is why I moved, as you noticed, 'all the crap' from in front of the other one."
Chaz let Reid walk him into the next room, but as soon as he looked up, he stopped dead. He could hear Langly sliding the door closed behind them, but that barely registered as he took in the dark walls and the muted light that spilled down them from the windows at the end of the room. "Is this the part where you tell me I actually died, and welcome me to the afterlife? Because I might be a little disappointed, but not much."
"Sorry, you're still breathing." Langly clapped him on the back, as he passed, heading for the bed that Chaz was just beginning to realise occupied the entire other end of the room.
"You remember that conversation about how you weren't going to put a bed--"
"In my living room?" Reid drawled. "It's not my living room. It's his living room."
"It's your master bedroom, complete with attached bath, which I will be replacing with a whirlpool tub that fits all three of us." Langly smiled smugly as he kicked off his shoes. "Byers owns the building. I can do that."
"Yeah, still not convinced this isn't Narnia." Chaz took another look around the room, picking out the glow stars on the ceiling that the light hadn't yet reached. "What the hell, Frank?"
Langly shrugged and tipped backwards to sprawl across the bed. "I can take a hint, occasionally. I took his entire apartment and redid it in blue and purple, instead of green and blue, because it's a bedroom, and it's supposed to be relaxing. He likes dim, but not dark, and the best way to get there is to make the walls dark, which I know, because surprise, guess who also doesn't have white walls. And the bed had to be big enough for three of us in any direction, and you had to not be able to fall out of it, so maybe that's a little over the top, but I'm voting it's not, because I've met us. Anyway, welcome to the mythical land of Go The Fuck To Bed."
Chaz staggered away from Reid and collapsed face-first onto the bed. "Nobody wake me up before noon."
"I'm not waking you up before four, and that's because we've got dinner reservations at seven." Reid carefully undressed, at the foot of the bed, hanging his clothes on the rack Langly had dragged in from somewhere, while he wasn't looking.
"I'll be out of your way by then," Chaz promised.
"Don't be a dumbass, Villette." Langly elbowed him sharply. "We're taking you out to dinner. It's Valentine's Day."
"Which is exactly why I should go home."
"You can't. They're still processing the scene, and then you have to get it cleaned," Reid reminded him. "You're stuck with one of us, for a few days."
"Or both of us." Langly grinned.
"I'm so glad Duke's never seen your apartment, but what's JJ going to think?"
"She's not. She doesn't know you're here. And if Garcia tells her, I'm telling her you slept on the couch. I used to sleep on that couch. It's more comfortable than it looks." Reid studied the configuration of bodies. "And you're on my side of the bed."
Chaz groaned. "Do you care? Do you really care?"
"No, but when you attempt to jam yourself into the corner, there's going to be about seven feet between you and the reflexive end of that thought."
Chaz blinked against his forearm and turned his head to look at Langly.
"And I put the juice and shitty protein bars on the other side of the bed." Langly took his glasses off and tossed them towards the windows, listening for the sound of them hitting a shelf.
"You built a bed for Spencer, but you put food neither of you like next to it."
"Because you like it, and we like you." Langly propped himself up on his elbow and squinted at Chaz. "Did you hit your head or something? You're not usually this completely fucking dumb."
Reid slipped into the space between Chaz and the wrong wall, pulling himself up to the top of the bed to get under the blankets. "This hasn't been the best day for either of us. Also, it's Valentine's Day," he reminded Langly, "and he's single."
"What the hell am I, chopped meat?" Langly poked Chaz sharply in the ribs.
"Since this conversation is clearly headed in that direction, let me just say I prefer your meat intact," Chaz muttered against his arm. "And now if we're done psychoanalysing the least coherent member of this fucksandwich, I was on my way to sleep. Pretty sure this falls under 'don't profile your co-workers', at the very least, Spencer."
"I think we're pretty far past that. Pretty sure we just jumped headlong into 'using your profiling skills to avoid screwing up yet another relationship'."
Chaz lifted his head and blinked blearily up from somewhere around Reid's hip. "Does that even work?"
"I have no idea, but, for obvious reasons, I'm sure you'll be the first to know."