Chapter Text
It's dark around him, he doesn't remember where he fell asleep, he doesn't recognize where he woke up. His body feels heavy and sluggish.
He tries to get a feel of his surroundings. Definitely on a bed, it is a soft and large bed. There is no end in either direction to make out.
The pillows and blankets smell familiar, they send a sense of comfort through him, he doesn't feel like he is in a life threatening situation, not with that smell, not with that much comfort.
He still needs to figure out where he is, sliding to one side of the bed. The windows are tightly shut, there is no possibility of light coming through the curtains.
He can make out a door, the slit between door and floor is illuminated. The only light source in the room, not enough to see anything else. Something keeps him from getting out of bed.
"Accio wand." He tries, nothing happens. A chill ran through him, that wasn't his voice, way too high and pitchy. His voice should be rough from sleep. Dread sets in the pit of his stomach.
He tries to remember what is the last thing he knows. Everything after the battle of Hogwarts is not clear.
He was sent to Azkaban with his mother and father. How long he was in there he doesn't know it could be anything between days and years. At least there were no dementors, just you alone with your mind, your guilt and your mistakes. He could hear his mother crying, he couldn't find it in him to comfort her.
At some time he was sent to a courtroom, he doesn't remember much of it either, just green eyes that look at him without hate but just too much pity. By some miracle he and his mother were freed and put under house arrest in the Manor. That's right he is at the Malfoy Manor, for a few weeks now.
Mother had insisted that they would remodel the Manor, since Draco is the Lord now. He didn't want to have anything to do with it and let her have free reign over it.
They get frequent visits from Aurors, who check that they don't break their parole or do anything else illegal.
Most of the time he sits in the garden and stares ahead, mother tries to get him to eat but everything just tastes like ashes.
That would explain the lack of his wand, he didn't get it back after the battle and he isn't allowed a new one.
With a sign he stands up and opens the door. And sure enough he stands in the hallways of Malfoy Manor. Something is still off, didn't mother just take all of the portraits down. But all around he was greeted with old Malfoy Lords and Lady's.
He walks over to the bathroom, this one at least was just how he remembers it. Over at the sink he turns the water on and splashed his face, he needs to get rid of that nagging feeling at the back of his head. He cups water in his hands and drinks a few sips.
His eyes travel to the mirror over the sink and he screams.
He screams until hands shake him and brake eye contact between him and his reflection.
He was met with a worried face, his mothers.
"Draco, my love, are you alright." Narcissa looks at least 20 years younger, she bent down to be at eye level with him.
She is beautiful, she always was, but untouched by the war she was radiant. His eyes travel back to the mirror and were greeted by an 11 year old Draco Malfoy.
Still with round cheeks and big round eyes.
"Just a bad dream." He says again with this high pitched voice, he couldn't remember ever sounding like that. His eyes are not leaving his own face.
"Well let's get you a hot chocolate and cuddle." Strong and steady hands guide him back to his room.
Notes:
This is first Drarry fic, so I hope you enjoy it.
Please let me know what you are thinking.
English is not my first language, I apologize for any mistakes I make.
Chapter 2
Notes:
I am no Snape fan at all.
But in favour of this story I will change his character drastically.
Chapter Text
The next time Draco woke up the room was flooded with light, the curtains were pulled back and he was alone again.
He took his time and looked around. That was his room just how he remembered it at age 11. His bed was in the middle, headboard against the wall, between two big floor to ceiling windows, the walls are lined with bookcases, on one wall are Quidditch memorabilia, poster of his favourite Quidditch team, the chudley canons and his broom mounted, opposite the door was another door that led to his walk-in closet. The bookcases are just half filled with books, the rest are plushies and other toys and gimmicks.
The color scheme was a little more colourful, than it will be in the coming years.
Draco didn't know how to feel, did anything he remembers actually happened.
Slowly his hands wander to his left forearm, he was terrified, what if it will be there, on his eleven year old body. He never wanted it in the first place but to have it on this small and fragile body felt worse. Slowly he pulled his sleeve up.
Where the dark mark was supposed to be was a long and thick scar. At first there was relief and then terror.
How was he supposed to work out what that meant?
Somehow he got transported into the past and whatever magic did that was able to hide his mark behind a scar, it wasn't able to get rid of it. So that wasn't his real eleven year old body.
His eighteen year old body mixed with it or what does it mean?
His eyes traveled to his left calf, more panic seized him, he started sweating. If what ever happened wasn't able to vanish the mark was it able to get rid of that?
His breathing got faster but it didn't supply him with enough air. The end of his vision grew blurred, he could just stare at his leg unable to move.
His hand landed on his calf and he could feel the raised and hollowed pattern of his skin, slowly he pulled his pant leg up. He started sobbing like the child he looked like.
It was still there, the curse, the punishment he got because his father failed his quest. The bite mark of Fenrir Greyback.
The shock of actually seeing it on such a small body snapped him into action. He got out of bed and started getting dressed. He needed to get answers.
How and why, he ended up here?
What was he supposed to do?
Could he change the future?
Should he change it?
Time travel was not without risks.
But first of all he needs to know when the next full moon is.
Did he have enough time to brew wolfsbane potion?
Was he able to brew it?
He assisted Severus a few times but that didn't qualify him to do it himself. Wolfsbane was a high risk potion, a little mistake in brewing would carry out a big mistake in consumption.
Severus!
The memory of his godfather made him freeze. He had seen his lifeless body, he attended his funeral, he listened to Potter proclaiming him as a war hero.
Apparently he was a spy for the order the whole time. They never were super close but he still looked up to him.
He was able to do something Draco wasn't able to do.
Severus was someone he could trust, he could trust him more than his father especially with the garnly truth of Draco's leg. He needed to get in immediate contact with Severus. He would tell him everything and ask him for help, and Merlin he needed help, and this time he would accept Severus' help.
He drafted out several letters but he couldn't convey the urgency as convincing as it needed to be, he needed to remind him that they weren't as close as they would be and that he indeed was 11 for everyone around him.
In the end he went with short and ominous, hoping to peak his interest. He was able to figure out that the full moon will be in 10 days, not enough time to brew wolfsbane himself but if Severus happened to be in possession or be able to brew it faster than Draco would be, there would be hope. Draco suffered through two transformations without the potion and he would love to be able to prevent that if possible. He also wanted to keep that a secret from his parents, especially his mother. He wanted to spare her as much grief as possible, there soon will be enough sorrow for her.
* * *
The afternoon, he was waiting for an answer from Severus was spent in the garden, watching Narcissa tending to the rose bushes, picking the prettiest for an arrangement.
It felt like a memory that he was watching in a pensive. He never would have imagined that he would see his mother that happy again. He himself felt quiet at peace in the summer sun, he nearly could leave the memories behind and forget them as bad dreams.
It helped that he didn't need to face his father yet. Seeing that face, that is so awfully like his own that betrayed every trust that Draco and Narcissa had in him. That he couldn't forget.
"Draco, I received a rather interesting owl this morning. Would you be able to explain the meaning of this?" The voice of Severus cut through his musing of past and present. The dark figure standing in the glas door to the sun room seemed unreal. The last time he saw that man, he was bleeding to his death.
Draco's heartbeat increased and he could see his vision swimming. He tried to even his breathing and stop panicking, there are way more pressing matters.
A glance at his mother showed her still preoccupied with the flowers, she hadn't noticed Severus' arrival.
"Severus. Good to see you so soon. Please follow me." Draco hears his way to a high voice say.
It lost his usual arrogant drawl, he had in another lifetime at eleven. He could see Severus raising an eyebrow but he still followed him through the mansion to Draco's room.
The moment the door to Draco's room closed and the both were alone Draco put pleading eyes at Severus and started rambling
"I know this will sound like a prank or just completely crazy, but you need to listen to me, you need to believe me! You have to! I just woke up this morning here in this room but I fell asleep somewhere else! You need to believe me! I fell asleep like an 18 year old boy! Lord Voldemort came back and I, no, You killed Dumbledore and I got bitten and you died. So many people died, there was a war. It was hell. There was a big battle. I was bitten by Fenrir Greyback and now I am a werewolf. You need to help me please! I need wolfsbane potion. I think I came from the future! I know that's a crazy thing to say but it's true. I was in Azkaban but I got freed. The good side won the war.-"
"-draco stop." Severus grabbed him at the shoulders, Draco didn't notice that he was hyperventilating and crying.
He was shaking violently.
"I can't Severus, please help me. I need your help."
"You need to breathe first. I couldn't understand half of what you said. Calm down and then start from the beginning."
A few moments passed, silent and tense, Draco sitting at the edge of his bed Severus towering over him.
"I'm a werewolf" deciding that the important information needed to be transferred first, he pulled his pant leg up and showed the bite.
Severus breathed in sharply, he bowed down and inspected the bite he pulled his wand out causing Draco to flinsh. He recognised the diagnosing spells Severus performed.
"That is not fresh, that happened a while ago." There was no doubt what he was asking.
"It happened when I was 16. The Dark Lord had given my father a quest, but he failed and as a punishment he set Fenrir Greyback at me. I was supposed to die, but apparently Grayback thinks I'm too pretty. He let me live as one of his cubs. And I got my own mission from the Dark Lord to redeem my family." There was no emotion in his voice, only thing he noticed that even his high boyish voice seemed to age with the information it conveyed.
Severus was watching him, and Draco could feel the attempt at occlumency at the corner of his mind unable to penetrate.
"Sorry Aunt Bella taught me. I don't know how to take them down."
There was no emotion on either man's face, both were watching the other for a reaction.
"Are you telling me, Draco, that you are from the future?" Severus stood back up without breaking eye contact.
"Severus, I don't know what or who or when I am. I just know I suddenly woke up as an eleven year old. I kept the bite and I kept this." He showed his left arm where the scar that replaced the dark mark sat.
That got a reaction out of Severus, his eyes went wide and his hand went on its own accord to his forearm. Even as only a scar it was obvious what it represents.
"Oh Draco." There was sadness in his voice.
Chapter Text
The following days were spent in the library, fishing every book about time travel out of the book cases. There were a lot of theories and hypotheses, but nothing concrete. Rather unhelpful.
He found a few case reports of people traveling further in the past as they had planned or being trapped in a time loop, but nothing that came close to his own situation.
Every morning he hoped he would wake up in his old body, no matter how bad the situation was he left at 18 he didn’t want to experience the war a second time.
He started a journal, detailing everything he remembered about the coming years. The first ones were rather sparse, coming closer to the war it got more detailed. That's how memories work.
The situation with the full moon was not good either. Severus obviously didn’t have any wolfsbane potion on hand, and he wasn’t able to acquire some either. Their new and only plan was that Draco would visit Severus for a few days and they would set up his basement to be wolf safe.
Draco felt bad to put Severus in so much danger, if they would just put one ward wrong and Draco would get out, that would be bad. But Severus just assured Draco he would be fine, that he would be able to handle Draco.
Draco was able to avoid his father. Fortunately Lucius was very busy with whatever he always did in the ministry. Probably bribing and black mailing.
He had hated his father at the end of the war and he still couldn't shake that feeling, even if this person didn't do all that, but he will. So Draco stayed away.
The company of his mother he sought out, reliving in her happiness and jauntiness. She just radiated happiness, she blossomed in her tasks to organise the newest evening event the whole pureblood world would keep going on about. The next one would be the autumn equinox, he would miss it being in Hogwarts. The first one he would miss, he had attended every gala his mother had hosted so far, always playing the perfect little heir. He was so glad to not be attending, until he figured out who he is now.
Is this a new beginning, is it redemption or did nothing really change?
Well he wasn't the same spoiled prat like last time, but what was he then?
He felt disconnected to the whole pureblood show, but does that make him a blood traitor?
Not better than a Weasley?
* * *
The dreaded day came way too quick.
After green heatless flames he found himself standing in a very ordinary living room, face to face with Severus.
They both shared what they could find out about time travel and both were empty handed.
"We should talk to Dumbledore about this." Snape suggested not for the first time and Draco gave the same answer,
"No, I don't trust Dumbledore." At what Snape would scoff but didn't press why.
Both their opinions were that Draco shouldn't talk much about the other timeline. Just in case, they hadn’t enough information to work out what would happen if Draco gives information. And he could see Severus did want the information but he also could see he was afraid. No one could blame him. War was nothing to joke about. Draco didn’t even want to know what he knew.
Only a few hours to go, Draco couldn't keep sitting still and concentrate on their research. He started pacing and fidgeting, to the great annoyance of Severus.
The hours ticked by, Draco could feel the seconds crawl by. He could feel his skin starting to itch and getting hot and sticky with sweat.
An hour before the moon rose they went down into the basement.
"You put up charms to keep me loked up?"
"Yes."
"And wards so if the charms break I still can't get out?"
"Yes."
He asked not for the first time.
"And when I make it out you won't hesitate to jinx me!"
"Yes. I will scar your pretty face, boy."
They made it downstairs and Draco vomited instantly.
"Nice touch with the silver." Swiping his mouth with the sleeve. With a flick of the wand the vomit was gone and the door opened.
The inside was rather small, like the rest of the house. An old mattress in the middle of the room and nothing more. Well, except next to the mattress was a small box.
"What's this?" He opened it and pulled some very weird contraptions out of it. One was a short thick rope with knots at the ends, another one looked like a bone but softer and made a weird noise if pressed and the last one was a small ball that was hard but bounced back.
"Muggle dog toys." Severus said with a straight face.
"What are they for?"
"Obviously for you to play with."
It was so absurd Draco couldn't hold his laughter, all the stress of the last hours was gone, he was just laughing.
The transformation wasn't bad. Was it great no, but it wasn't terrible either. He had vague memories, he was angry the enclosure was too small. He had explored the tiny basement, he had torn the mattress apart and he actually had played with the dog toys, mainly with the bounce ball.
He laid on the mattress, or what was left of it for a few hours trying to sleep until he felt the wards lifting and then heard the door opening.
Snape stood over him, Draco's body felt too heavy to move much or at all, he got examined for potential injuries. He actually got some slashed on his back, he didn't remember them.
Quite impressive actually how he was able to claw at his back. With some flicks of Severus wand the wounds closed, he also rubbed some ditany on it easing the pain out of Draco's body.
"It will scar."
"T'is fine. Not the first one." He mumbled.
He got some pepper up potion, blood replenish and more he couldn't clearly identify.
He felt too tired to move but too energised to sleep. So his day consisted of alternating between trying to sleep and trying to read, succession in nothing. He also felt too queasy to eat so he just drank tea after tea.
* * *
That afternoon he went home for dinner, he couldn't sleep the night and he didn't manage to sleep during the day. He was understandably dead on his feet but couldn't let his parents know.
To his horror Lucius was early home and would attend dinner with his family. He tried hard to come up with an excuse to just go to his room but nothing would come to mind.
So he found himself sitting in the middle of their way too opulent dinner table to his right Lucius and to his left his mother. His parents made idle small talk with each other.
At least Draco's appetite returned so that wouldn't draw attention. Draco just tried to be invisible but obviously that didn't work.
His father addressed him during the appetizers.
"Son, I have good news for you. Your letter came this morning." He levitated said letter over to him.
The emotions that were coursing through him were hard to figure out, but he schooled his features to look excited. He snached the letter out of the air and was greeted with the same elegant handwriting in emerald green he knew so well. He read it even though he still knew it from memory, from all those years ago. It was identical.
"We will escort you to Diagon Alley tomorrow to get all your necessaries." His mother smiled lovely while the house elves served the main course.
The rest of the meal went by uneventfully. Father talked just to hear himself talk.
Dracos mind was at the first time he was shopping for his first year supplies.
He ran into Harry Potter in Madame Malkin's without realising it at first, the realization came later, seeing that boy on the train again with the famous scar visible. He made a full arse out of himself on both occasions, nothing new.
He dreaded that meeting now, not knowing how to behave in front of the Savior of the wizarding world. Well obviously he wasn't yet the chosen one or the Savior of the Wizarding world, he was just the boy who lived.
Merlin wizards really gave corny nicknames to their celebrities.
Draco just needed to go to Madame Malkin's at another time, then it would be easy to avoid Potter.
Right?
Notes:
I would appreciate if you would let me know what you think.
My apologies for any mistake I make, English is not my first language.
Chapter Text
Apparently it wasn't as easy as he thought.
He could convince his mother to first get his books, then his wand and after that his new robes.
Luckly Lucius decided to part from them to go about his own business. Draco remembers from last time that he had bothered Lucius and whined that he wanted to go with him.
This time he just followed his mother and bid his father a polite goodbye.
Inside Flourish and Blotts he saw Granger excitedly taking book after book from the shelves, he couldn't see her parents.
He kept his head down, how ironic for a Malfoy, got his required books and a few extra ones.
He was especially excited about Ollivanders. Finally getting a wand, his old wand, he had missed it after Potter took it from him, no wand he held after felt quite right and after the battle he wasn't allowed a new one. So this was very special to him.
Entering the shop felt just as last time, even growing up around magic this place felt magical.
He didn't think this through, he forgot that for the wand shopping he actually had to see the owner. Both Malfoys stood in the small stuffed room and Ollivander just popped up from some shelf.
The old wrinkled face looks just like it did the last time he saw him. The lighting was just as bad as in the Manor cellar, he could just be back there bringing the prisoners food, trying to talk to them as if they were somewhere else. They wanted to be there as much as he did himself.
That was his only good deed in the war, he never tourtured the prisoners, tried to be nice to them, even to Thomas. He smuggled good food down there that was edible instead of the slime he was supposed to bring.
He could hear Auntie Bella cackling while torturing and Nargini slithering around and eating the corpses left around his childhood home. He felt bile rising in his throat and his hands started shaking.
His mother placed a hand on his shoulder bringing him back to the now.
"We are here for Draco's first wand." She explained calming Draco down.
He needed to get a grip. All those horrible things didn't happen yet, he took a deep breath, calming his nerves further.
Getting back to his excited mind set of getting his first wand. But everytime Olivander moved suddenly or in Draco's direction he would flinch.
Trying to wait patiently for his 10'' Hawthorne unicorn hair wand to be presented to him. Wand after wand got tested building a tower on his desk.
Then there it was his trusted and loved wand, but holding it, did nothing just like the rest of the wands did nothing.
He could feel his mother getting nervous casting looks out the window, no one could see that a Malfoy was struggling to get a wand.
Ollivander on the other hand got more and more excited, the more wands Draco discarded the happier he got.
Ollivander took the Hawthorne wand back, and Draco's hairs stood up and his neck started to prickle.
This was not right, he was supposed to get his wand back.
Did this time travel bullshit damage his magic?
Was he still capable of magic?
Was he a squib now?
Knowledge of the future but banned from Hogwarts because he isn't magical anymore.
Then the door opens and no other than Harry fucking Potter walked in. He looked just as young as Draco did. He looked around, mesmerized, trying to see everything.
"Be with you shortly." Ollivander informed Potter while placing another wand into Draco's hand.
Potter looked back at them and had the nerve to smile at Draco. He sat himself on a chair in the corner to wait patiently and politely. What a tosser.
Draco tried to get his attention back on the wand in his hand but still could feel Potter's eyes on him. He moved the wand and nothing happened again.
"Has he ever performed accidental magic?" Draco's heart sank at the question.
"Of course! I hope you are not instigating anything?" Mother was at his side, putting a hand on his shoulder glaring at Ollivander, "my son is certainly no squib! He even performed magic with my wand before!" The grip on his shoulder got stronger.
Ollivander was unaffected by Narcissa's cold tone.
"Ah yes yes yes, 15" chestnut unicorn hair." He kept mumbling to himself and retreated into his shelves.
"Stay here I will get you father!"
"No, mother, it is fine." But she didn't listen to him storming off.
Draco watched after her, very aware of Potter's eyes on him.
"What's a squib?" Potter's voice was as high as his own, untouched by puberty.
He looked over to him sitting on the high chair watching Draco with big and curious eyes.
"Someone who is born in a magical family but is showing no signs of magic itself. The opposite of muggleborn" He answers automatically leaving out all the curse words and racist slurs, that usually accompanied this explanation in his family.
Ollivander came back around with more wands in his arms and an excited glint in his eyes.
He put wand after wand in his hands without anything happening. He hurried back in his shelves murmuring to himself about wand sizes, cores and what not.
"Don't worry you will get one." Potter dared to smile in support at him with that irritating young face.
"Of course I will." It was too easy to fall into his old behaviour around Potter, being snarky and condescending. But in contrast to the other timeline Potter just kept smiling at him.
"I'm Harry." He extended his hand in Dracos direction.
What a bad joke the universe plays.
How often did Draco think about that time Potter refused to shake his hand, just because he was an insufferable bigoted boy who insulted his friends.
He stared at the small tan hand, a stark contrast to his pale hand. He shook the offered hand once.
"Draco Malfoy. Nice to make your acquaintance." His cursed manners kicking in, Potter's smile just getting bigger.
Ollivander came back again, never giving up, with one single wand.
His pale eyes fluttered over Draco. To Draco's absolute horror lingering shortly at his chest, left forearm and left leg, as if he could see it, as if he could see through Draco's robes and not only see his scars but could see everything about Draco.
Could he see that Draco wasn't from this time?
"This wand, ... this wand has been in my family for a long time. He never accepted a wizard before, it is the oldest wand I own. 10" apple unicorn hair." He put it softly in Draco's hand.
His whole body started to tingle and his left hand holding the wand grew a comfortable warmth. It felt more like an extension of his arm than something he was holding. He never even felt that with his old one.
"Well well well, at last. How wonderful."
"See Draco, I told you, you would find one" Potter was standing next to him, looking very happy for him. How odd.
"You will be able to do great things with that wand, Mr. Malfoy, great things. Quite different from your family, following in those steps you might find especially hard. The unicorn hair will be faithful to you and only to you, but certain things can cause the hair to die. Mixed with the apple the wand is very powerful, supporting the high ambitions of the owner, but doing very poorly in the dark arts." Ollivander delivered that speech calmly, even when he accused his family of being dark wizards there was no real accusation, just stating facts.
Just as he was done the door opened, and Lucius and Narcissa stepped back in the shop. Draco took a step back from Potter, shielding him from his fathers eyesight.
"Father, I was able to acquire a wand." He held said wand up.
"Wonderful." His mother put her hands on his shoulder and gave them a squeeze.
"What kind of wand is this?" Father questioned Ollivander.
"10" apple unicorn hair. Quite an extraordinary combination." Lucius looked disgusted.
"There is no other option available?"
"No sir, the wand chooses the wizard."
Sneering, he bought the wand and left the shop, without waiting for the exchange money.
"Keep the change, for all your trouble." Mother said diplomatically, looking over all the boxes of wands Draco had tried.
"No trouble at all." With a flick of his own wand every box flew back to their place.
"Bye Harry." Draco said with a wink, leaving the shop after his mother.
Hours later he would still think about it, why did he do that?
Notes:
I would enjoy a comment about your thoughts and kudos if you enjoyed it :)
Chapter Text
Mother escorted Draco to Platform 9 ¾, he actually got excited again, his last trips were sullied by that snake man and the war. It felt great to be able to get himself swept in the excitement of all the people around him.
They arrived at the designated apparition point. Narcissa gave the same speech of behaving well, keeping the name of Malfoy proud, not causing too much trouble for Severus, and yadda yadda.
“Mother, how would you react if I wouldn't be sorted into Slytherin?” he interrupted her, watching closely for her reaction.
He knew of just one Family member that wasn’t sorted into Slytherin, Sirius Black, his mothers cousin, he didn't know about one on the Malfoy side of his Family. His mother didn’t answer right away, she studied his face closely.
“What makes you ask such a question?” She holds his shoulder.
“What would happen?”
“What should happen? Don’t worry you will make it into Slytherin.”
“But what if I don't?”
“There is no use in plaguing us with what if’s”
“Would I get disowned?” Her grip tightened and there was open angst in her face, she was able to hide it quickly but Draco saw the panik. He knows what that means, she would never do that, but she couldn’t warrant that for her husband. He had seen that look often on her face, she didn't know what her husband was capable of. He knew she loved him, did she love Lucius more than Draco? Time will show what side she chooses. In the other timeline she chose Draco, but never against her husband. She lied to the Dark Lord but wasn’t able to say anything against her husband. Draco didn’t blame her, he didn't understand love that well, he never had loved anyone.
“You are right. Why worry about what ifs. Thank you for accompanying me mother. I will write to you.” he took her hand off his shoulder, gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and boarded the train, without looking back.
* * *
The journey to Hogsmead was uneventful. He found a compartment filled with all his childhood friends.
Half of which would die.
He made polite small talk but mostly watched the szenerie changing outside the train.
This time when the rumor reached him that the Harry Potter (trademark) was on board, he didn’t want to check it out.
When they finally arrived he was one of the last to exit the train. Shortly he considered just getting to the carriages and driving this way up. But then he remembered the view from the boats and that he didn't want to miss. He made it just to the shore as they started departing.
Suddenly he got jerked into a boat. His eyes met green eyes.
"Hi Draco." Harry Potter smiled at him, again. Why was this boy so happy? They didn't talk much during the crossing of the great lake. In the boat were also the Ginger and Granger. There was just a little bit of jealousy on his part for how quick they apparently got friends, just a tiny bit.
He never made friends on his own. Did he ever have real friends? Every friendship he had he got because of family ties, Vincent, Greg and Theo as well as Blaise. Even Pansy was at first just interested because he was a respectable pureblood, later they got closer, platonically, but would they have ended there if their relationship wasn’t set up by their parents. Pathetic.
* * *
He was able to avoid Potter for the rest of the trip up to the entrance hall.
Once he was sorted he could avoid Potter even better. He would never survive living in the same common room as him.
So Gryffindor was completely out of the question. Not that that ever was a possibility, he wasn't brave enough at all. If he were brave he would have been able to stand up to his father even once, but he always bowed his head. Bravery is out.
Ravenclaw could be interesting, he certainly reached their demands, he valued knowledge and he was smart. It would also certainly help him figuring out why he was trapped in the past, there were rumours that the Ravenclaws had their own library.
His loyalty was only to himself and his mother so Hufflepuff is out too. Luckily, he would also lose every self-respect if he were put in that house.
So the run was between Slytherin and Ravenclaw, not bad he could handle either.
He stood in the middle of the bulk of chittering students standing in front of McGonagall and the hat. The hat sang his song, as ever way too long and boring, and then the sorting could begin. Starting off with Hannah Abbott to Hufflepuff and so on.
Draco didn't pay much mind until it was his time. He walked up to the hat, mustering every ounce of Malfoy Pride he still had. The hat covered his eyes. He didn't remember that from last time, being sorted so fast.
"Long time since my last time traveler."
"What? You know more? Tell me!"
"I am only a hat with a simple task, I don't know much." He felt the intrusion of occlumency, but easily sliding around his walls, panicking he tried to stabilise them.
"That is no use against me. Let's see. A great mind, but a damaged one, touched by war, death and destruction. I can see attributes of each house in you, but which one would help you best. Slytherin is your old house, would this help you grow this time or would this just enable you to fall in old habits. Ravenclaw would be a good place, I see a great mind willing to be filled with more knowledge. And yes I also see attributes for Hufflepuff but the strong character causes more trouble even though I think you could also learn from them, about true friendship and it would humble you." The hat chuckled to himself. Draco didn't dare to say anything. Let the hat battle it out.
"And then there is Gryffindor, I see no big fan, but believe me I see enough courage in you, even if it just needs to be brought out. It is also a place for lifelong friendships."
"Just put me in Slytherin, I know it. I won't become a death eater again, never again. I swear!" The hat didn't answer, for a long time. He tried to plead for Slytherin some more, vouching to never again become a death eater, but nothing came from the hat.
He turned his head, tilting so he could look at McGonagall, who just raised an eyebrow at him. Should he say he broke the hat? He turned back and closed his eyes. Listening to the silence of the hat.
The more time passed the louder he could hear the Great hall becoming. He got so embarrassed and self-conscious. A Malfoy a hatstall, never heard of before.
"Gryffindor!"
Draco's heart sank, the hat did not just say that out loud, did it? The hat was lifted from his hat. Panicked he looked at McGonagall, smiling at him, he turned further looking at Severus, who probably mirrored his panicked expression. A hand on his shoulder guided him in the opposite direction as all those years ago. The Great hall was silent. Just a few people who probably didn't know who he was, clapped politely.
He found himself seated next to Granger, the sorting moved on. He didn't move a muscle and didn't dare look at anyone in his new house let alone at his old one. A Malfoy in Gryffindor unheard of, so much for keeping a low profile.
He was startled out of his panicked mind by the sudden arrival of food all around him. He couldn't eat, he felt like puking and adding food to that feeling wouldn't be a good idea. So he just sat there and started at his plate.
No one talked to him or acknowledged him, which suited him just fine.
His attention was drawn as Harry asked one of the Weasleys, "Who is that next to Professor Quirrel?"
Before the Weasley could answer Draco heard himself say, "Professor Snape, the potion master. Supposed to be my head of house." He mumbled the last part but apparently not quiet enough.
A lot of eyes fixed on him. His upbringing kicking in, he held his head high.
"You wanted to be in Slytherin?" Someone asked.
"Of course I wanted to be in Slytherin, who wouldn't." Looking around the answer was obviously, noone. "Better than to be in Gryffindor, infested with," he couldn't say it, he didn't even believe it anymore, did he, so he settled for "Weasleys."
He doesn't know if there would have been more outcry if he had said mudblood or blood traitors. The old Weasley quiet them down again.
"Well Malfoy if you like it or not, this is your house now, there is no changing it, ever. No matter how much influence one family might have. So you better get used to it." He leaned closer over the table, "and don't think I don't know what you wanted to say first." Dracos response was just a sneer.
He succeeded in everyone actively avoiding him and casting disgruntled looks at him.
* * *
"First years follow me." Old Weasleys voice sounded over the crowd of first years.
Draco let himself be swept with the flow. His feet would have him instinctively walking down in the dungeons. But this time the journey went up. Stairs after stairs. Good thing he wasn't afraid of heights.
The journey ended in front of a portrait.
"Password." The fat lady asked.
"Pig Snout" Weasley said, and the portrait swung forward, "never forget it or you will be stranded in the hallway."
The common room was as different from his old as can be. It was just as big, but more cluttered. Everything was red and gold. Where the green and silver looked timeless and elegant, the Gryffindor looked old and pretentious. Nothing was new, it looked well used. No armchair looked like the next, different shades of red and different patterns.
It looked cosy, and Draco hated himself for thinking that.
“Boys dormitory on the left and the girls on the right." More stairs. He followed his new roommates upstairs. They were loud and wild.
The dormitories looked similar to Slytherin but instead of square the room was circular and of course red and gold.
His trunk sat at the end of the bed that was the closest to the door, on the other side was Thomas. He could live with that, at least he was far away from Potter.
He sat down and looked at the newly transfigured red tie and sweater and scarf and everything sickeningly red and gold. He doesn't look good in red.
All around him people were talking, they ignored him mostly, they were unpacking and claiming their places. Thomas next to him put posters of unmoving pictures over his bed. Football he said.
He was completely overwhelmed. He couldn't move, he just sat on his bed and kept staring around. Gryffindors are loud.
What is he supposed to do?
How will he ever survive seven years of this?
Or well if he will ever get so far.
Notes:
Feedback is always welcome :)
Chapter 6: Inside Gryffindor
Notes:
I love to read your comments and see the story through your perspective. It gives me new angles I haven't considered yet.
I really enjoy it. Thank you so much.
I hope I will do y'all justice.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Draco tried to blend in as well as he could, which was not at all.
He argued first thing in the morning with Weasley about the bathroom use, he had stood in line after Thomas and Weasley tried to cut the line. So it's not his fault at all. He was perfectly polite.
He made a side comment about Thomas and his football poster and Weasley took it as muggleborn prejudice.
Well he mostly fought with Weasley, the rest even Potter didn't interact much with him.
Longbottom even seemed to be actively afraid of him, so that wasn't different at all.
On his way down to breakfast he got flagged down by Theo and Blaise. Flabbergasted as to how he could end up not in Slytherin. They tried to cheer him up but as soon as Pansy joined, who at this point was still annoyingly in love with him, he fled to the Gryffindor table.
How bizarre.
Breakfast went by eventless. He sat beside Granger and some nameless face. Granger babbled on and on to whoever would listen.
* * *
The first lesson was Charms by Flitwick, Draco looked forward to it.
He had practiced a few spells with his new wand, it responded great and powerful. It felt more comforting in its magic, softer.
He enjoyed it greatly, even still feeling a little loss for his old one.
Charms was always his best Subjekt, next to Potions, and the only class he ever could beat Granger. Especially now.
They were not even half through the introduction as the door opened.
"Excuse the interruption Professor but we need to take Draco Malfoy out of your class." McGonagall said.
All eyes snapped to him but he stared at Snape who stood next to McGonagall.
"Take your things." He advised Draco quietly and even quieter he said "it's your father."
He could hear Weasley gloat but the rest was a blur.
He was led to the headmasters office.
"What did I do?"
"Nothing boy, your father is upset because of your sorting." Severus answers, earning a raised eyebrow from McGonagall.
"But I didn't do it on purpose, Severus. I didn't want to be put there. It was the damn hat."
"Language Mr Malfoy."
"I know, but Lucius is still livid, threatening to get you out of here."
"What no, I don't wanna leave! I need to stay here!" He grabbed Snape's arm, stopping them, "Severus, I need to stay here!"
"Sigh, I know, insufferable boy, that's why I brought you. Now let's go and get moving."
Draco was aware of the prying eyes of McGonagall, but didn't care, should she think what she wanted.
They made it to Dumbledore's office, and even outside they could hear loud voices.
McGonagall knocked sharp and opened the door. Revealing a standing Lucius Malfoy threatening Dumbledore loudly.
Amature move father.
His mother was sitting in a chair, ever so gracefully.
"Father, mother." He made his presence known.
The fury of his father snapped at him, immediately, he flinched at the fury in his father's eyes. He hated how he felt immediately inferior. Before he could cower as usual something snapped in him. His hatred for his father bubbled up. He gripped his wand inside his sleeve, he didn't draw it he just felt the wood under his skin. A reminder that he isn't the same as he used to be.
"Son, explain yourself!" He seized his shoulder, gripping it hard. The pain in his shoulder just solidified his resolution. He won't get shoved around again.
"I have nothing to explain myself for, I did nothing wrong. I tried to get into Slytherin but the hat didn't agree." He extracted the hand from his shoulder.
"This is your fault, your blood, the troubled Black's, Sirius and Andromeda. He got that from your blood. Never before was a Malfoy sorted into anywhere else than Slytherin." His father vented on, at the mention of her sister and cousin his mothers face went white.
"Father, you are making a scene. I think the only Malfoy who is tainting the name is you right now with your childish tantrum."
Maybe the hat wasn't wrong at all, he stood up against his father. The adrenaline coursing through his veins never felt so good.
His father looked at him, disbelieving his ears.
"My dear, don't say something like that to your father." His mother chastised him in French.
"I don't care, I am right." He answered without breaking eye contact with his father.
"Draco let's take a walk, Severus accompanies us."
"No thank you father, I don't see any need for that. I will continue my education in this school, in Gryffindor," he couldn't bring himself to say 'my house', he isn't there yet, "and it won't make a difference. I will bring home good grades and what more could a father want." He smiled diplomatically, setting his father chess mate, in front of Dumbledore of all people.
They held each other's eye for a long moment.
"Would that be all Lucius?" Dumbledore asked in his calm voice.
"Narcissa, let's go." He stormed off without waiting for her.
"Darling, why would you do that? My love, such a stubborn boy. I love you, but that was foolish of you." She hugged him short and gave him a kiss on the forehead.
"Will he be mad at you? I don't want anything happening to you."
She looked long at him without answering.
"I will be alright." She finally said with her crisp voice. Turning to his professors she nodded courtesy.
"Severus" she grabbed his arm, gave it a squeeze and then she was out the door.
He loved his mother fiercely, he hoped that this change in the timeline didn't put her too much in danger. She was a strong woman. He knew that but he was still worried.
He turned to Dumbledore, "May I go back to my classes, sir?"
Dumbledore gave him a kind look over his glasses smiling with his eyes.
He could feel a slight nudge on his walls, but as fast as it was there it was gone.
"Sir?"
"You are a remarkably interessesting young man Mr. Malfoy. I am intrigued to see what you will bring to this world."
There it was again, a slightly more forceful push. He narrowed his eyes, before he could say anything.
"You may go now."
Without hesitation Draco was out.
Dumbledore’s presence freaked him out. Not only because he multiple times tried to kill that old man but he looked too knowingly, like he could see you, all of you.
Well apparently he didn't hesitate to invade people's minds.
* * *
At lunch he overheard everyone speculating what had happened to him, apparently someone had seen him leaving Dumbledore's office, but not his father or mother.
The rumors grew more absurd as the day went on.
Gossip was so irritating if it was about oneself, and if you're not the one spreading the rumors. Who would have thought.
Every free minute Draco had he would hide in the library. He found some promising books about time travel. He secured the most hidden table for himself. It was a four seater but he was sure he would be able to defend it.
* * *
The next few days went better, he was able to blend more in.
He wasn't able to not fight with Weasley, baby steps.
At least he was able to have rather civil conversations with the rest of his dorm.
He asked Thomas about football and got a very passionate explanation.
"There are eleven people in each team, one goal and one ball, you have a goalie, five defenders, three midfielders and two forwards. The game is won by whichever team scores the most goals in the set time."
"So they just run on grass chasing one ball, a ball that doesn't move on its own accord?"
They fell in quite a comfortable conversation, Thomas noticed he needed to explain a little slower, starting with the concept of kicking the ball to move it.
He still tried in succes to keep Potter far away from him. Easy when every time Potter was around so was Weasley and they couldn't exchange words without insults.
At curfew he would lay in bed, hidden by the curtains, reading and listening to the other boys.
He needed to agree Finnigan was surprisingly funny, even if most of the jokes were only funny because of his accent. Thomas was a smart guy, reminding him of Theo, with his indestructible patients. Neville was just trough and trough a kind boy, awfully shy but so soft.
In classes he had with Slytherin he would sit with Blaise. Getting updates on what they were getting up to in the dungeons.
It was a peaceful life.
Notes:
I just got vaccinated so I will mostly lie in bed, a lot of time to keep writing, if I don't fall asleep.
Comments and Kudos are always welcome :)
Chapter 7: It already changed
Summary:
A lot of appreciation for my lovely Beta-Reader Claunsstar
Check them out :)
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
It was the weekend, Draco woke up before everybody else in his dorm. He decided he would get an early breakfast and then a glorious day in the library.
Just one week into the semester and he was already packed with homework. He would finish it quickly and then dedicate the rest of the day to his research.
He found a few curses as well as Potions. He needed to find out more about that.
He just made it to the entrance hall, deep in thought. He was stopped by a can on his shoulder. A very familiar feeling.
"Son." His father's voice was cold. He turned around to his father and a few steps behind him Snape. Draco kept his eyes on his father.
"Father."
"I was pleasantly surprised to hear you kept in touch with your old acquaintances."
"Well of course, sir."
"Also that your performances in class are extraordinary."
How did he hear that yet? It was only a week into term. They mostly had introductions into the subject. The only classes who already started up were potions and transfiguration. He didn't doubt that any of those teachers would say anything else after witnessing the last meeting between father and son.
"Of course father like I said I would, sir."
Lucius seemed satisfied with Draco's politeness, as that would make Draco follow him again.
"Very well, your mother sends her best."
"How is mother?"
"Occupied with the organisation of the autumn equinox gala. Sadly you will miss it."
There was a pause. Severus looked like he was ready to jump in every moment, to do what Draco didn't know.
"After your not so horrible performance in Hogwarts I have decided to leave you at Hogwarts in that horrid house." The unsaid threat was loud and clear.
"Thank you sir."
Lucius turned around with a flourish, Draco always admired the grace his father had, but seeing it now as the farce it was.
Lucius had no power with Voldemort and now had no power over Draco. It was all a show, an illusion.
The way Severus followed him had more grace and dignity.
He turned around, thoughts about food forgotten. He came face to face with Potter and Weasley. Of course that was his luck, wasn't it.
"Your father wanted to pull you from Hogwarts for being in Gryffindor?" Potter asked.
"You call your father sir?" Weasley asked.
"Is being a Gryffindor so bad?" Potter seemed to show sympathy, how awful.
"What are you all so surprised about? I made it perfectly clear I didn't want to be a Gryffindor from the start."
"You call your father sir?" Weasley was as ever slow on the up pick.
"Yes, what do you call yours?"
"Dad?!"
"Well just showing that your family has no manners."
"Or that my parents actually like me."
"Ron!" Potter chastised
"Oh you really think so? You don't think you're just a casualty of your parents wanting a girl?!"
"Draco!"
Ron's face grew horrible red, clashing strongly with his hair.
"Fuck you! Wanted or not, at least they love me! You were a requirement to their pureblood status as if they give a rat's as about you!"
Weasley had grabbed the front of Draco's robes pulling him close to his face. Draco was just as ready to hex him, wand in hand.
"No-no-no fighting in the cor-cor-corridors, bo-boys." Quirrel interrupted.
Potter pushes them bodily apart.
With even less grace than his father had, Draco flounced away.
* * *
He sat in his usual seat in the library still fuming at what Weasley said. The worst thing was he was not wrong, at least about his father. He still believed mother loved him for who he is. But Weasley hit a nerve about just being a requirement, his father isn't made to be a father, clearly.
He just needed to keep the Malfoy name going. He needed to marry and produce an heir. He didn't care for either Draco's mother or Draco. Well great cause Draco didn't care about him either.
Fuck Lucius for being a shitty person and fuck Weasley for being right.
A movement at his table ripped him out of his musing.
Granger was sitting diagonally in front of him.
"What are you doing?" He asked, his voice sounded as if he had cried, he cleared it.
"Homework" she looked up and then kept scribbling.
"My inquiry was more regarding the location of your being." He asked condescendingly.
She just raised an eyebrow "It's full everywhere else. Don't worry I won't say a word." She moved on.
He watched her, it really seemed she just wanted to study. Her face scrunched up in concentration, nibbling on her lip.
True to her word she didn't say a word, the whole time they sat together.
He looked back down at his own scroll, embarrassingly empty.
They worked in silence for most of the day. Draco must admit it was rather nice, the accompanying rustle of pergament and book's, the syncron scratching of their quills.
He finished his homework quickly and started his research.
He had very little memories from first year, so how was he supposed to not fuck up the timeline, never mind he already made a major alteration with being sorten with the lions.
Would it impact the rest of the time, who was he trying to be kidding. A lot of changes were made. He would never play Quidditch against Potter, being on the same team, well he probably will not get on the team with Potter occupying the seeker position. His only chance was to play another position. So that changed.
He won't become a death eater again, he is a werewolf at eleven, he is no bigot anymore and he already knows he is gay, no gay crisis needed. Those are just the changes in him.
So there was no way he wouldn't be able to change history. So why not embrace it and try to change more.
He could try and stop the Dark Lord from ever getting back to power.
The only problem was he didn't know how he came to power.
His first three years in Hogwarts were a blur, all he could remember was:
He was sorted into Slytherin, so he already failed that.
Potter got on the Quidditch team, how exactly he managed that he didn't know.
And at the end of the year Potter apparently defeated Voldemort who was possessing the back of Quirrell's head.
And because of Potter's heroics Slytherin lost the house cup.
Second year he made the Slytherin team, his father bought him in with the nimbus 2001, he called Granger a mudblood for pointing it out.
He cringed at the memory, at that age he didn't even know what that meant, just heard his father use it and he needed to be like Lucius so bad back then.
The true horrible nature of that word he learned when he saw his aunt carve it into Granger's skin.
In second year the heir of Slytherin petrified students, rumor was Potter was the heir because he was a parseltongue. But in the end Potter saved the day, again. He never figured out who the heir was.
Potter had managed to get into the chamber of secrets and allegedly killed a basilisk and safed the Weaselette.
Yes his memories were failing him.
Third year was just as little.
His Cousin escaped prison, his mother was very quiet at that time, and his father was gloating that they imprisoned an innocent man as a death eater and that he was able to escape it.
He could remember the dementors, the slumber party in the Great hall and getting mauled by the hippogriff. And the defence against the dark arts Professor getting fired for being a werewolf. Weren't that great perspectives for himself.
He should concentrate more on the upcoming year, he needed to somehow get Potter on the Quidditch team. And make sure he would defeat the Quirrell/Voldemort thing.
That sounded easy enough. Right?
At a very quiet moment his stomach decided to make his presence known.
Draco remembered he skipped breakfast and if the clock on the wall is to be trusted he also skipped lunch.
Granger chuckled as his stomach rumbled again.
"Shut it, Granger." But there was no malice in his words. He started packing his things to make it to dinner at least.
Granger fell into his steps.
"Charms is a rather interesting subject, I think it will be my favourite, even though I like the precision of potion and the accuracy of transfiguration. History is fascinating as well but a little dry." She was rambling.
He couldn't befriend her, she needed to be friends with Potter, without her they are lost, having not one functional brain between Weasley and Potter. And it was out of question for him to join their group as well. Out of question!
Notes:
Constructive Criticism is very welcome :D
Chapter 8: Remembrall
Summary:
This chapter was read and corrected by my lovely beta reader Claunsstar
A big thank you for that <3
Check them out, she has great works too :)
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
The first flying lesson was approaching. Draco didn't have the urge to show-off this time around but was still happy to get on a broom again.
The last time was in fifth year, before shit broke loose.
Granger was nervous and kept pestering about the mechanism, she asked so specific questions that even he wasn't able to answer.
Flying is just flying. You get on a broom and the rest ist instinct.
That didn't satisfy Granger, surprisingly.
Before the lesson had started he had talked to Blaise and Theo, with Pansy around, about Quidditch. How they used to play mini matches in their gardens. Bringing memories back that were totally lost to him before, Draco actually always preferred to play chaser. He couldn't admit to himself that he only ever played seeker to compete with Potter. He was a pathetic little sot.
Blaise complained about the school brooms and Draco and Theo agreed.
The class started slowly and dull. They were just summoning their brooms again and again.
When they were finally able to get on their brooms, Longbottom mocks it all up by falling and breaking his wrist.
Seeing the small shimmering red ball, Draco remembered something. He picked it up. It couldn't be, that because of the prank Draco pulled that Potter became seeker, could it?
"I wonder what he forgot." He tossed the ball in the air again and again, earning a few chuckles from the students around. He also got Potter's attention.
"Give it back, Malfoy!" Potter demanded.
When did Draco become Malfoy again? He ignored the sting of hearing Potter use his surname again.
He sneered, "make me!" And with a second nature move he was on his broom in the air.
Yes that was definitely the wrong thing to say, what's wrong with him? Gay or not you don’t flirt with the golden boy.
But nevertheless a few seconds later he could see Potter in the air, closing up to him. Draco let himself be chased for a while and shortly before Potter got to him he threw the ball, he was aiming for the window of the Transfiguration Professor's office. Potter zoomed past him, Draco watched him for a few seconds until he made his descent.
Playing innocent bystander.
Of course Granger had the nerve to chastise him.
Soon enough Potter was back, Remembrall in his hand, Gryffindor cheering and McGonagall storming their way.
If this wasn’t the reason, he got on the Quidditch team, at least it would give him detention. Good enough for him.
At dinner Weasley and Potter are talking animatedly with each other. Both looking happy so Draco assumes that he was right. Potter made the team.
After dinner Draco made his way to Snape’s office for his first portion of wolfsbane potion.
He knocked at the door. It was the first time after the sorting that they would see each other in private.
The door opened automatically and closed as well after Draco stepped in.
Snape entered from the other door that led to his private chambers, Draco was in there only once the last time around, it was very minimalistic.
He had a goblet in hand, with a head movement he beckoned Draco to his desk.
“I must confess this was a particularly difficult potion to brew. I had a few batches that did not turn out well. But I am rather confident that this would not kill you. The colour is just as it should be as well as the odour.” He put the goblet in front of Draco. “Please inspect it too.”
Colour was correct as was the stench. He had confidence in Severus, his potion making skills were exceptional.
“Looks alright. So bottoms up?” Snape gave a short nod and Draco drowned it as fast as possible. “The horrendous taste is correct too.”
“You said adding sugar renders the effect useless?”
“Yes, you actually told me that.”
A look crossed Snape’s face that he got when Draco’s time travel is mentioned. Part intrigued and part afraid.
He didn’t ask, instead he said, “is this a new development too?” his eyes travel to Draco’s tie, offensively red and gold.
“Yes. I don’t know how to feel about it. I never thought I would be able to be put in there! The possibility never crossed my mind.” Shaking his head, he sighed. “All those faces I fought in my past are now in my dorm.”
Severus never looked so sympathetic, no pity just understanding.
They talked about their respective research. Neither coming any closer. Draco showed him the potions he found, Snape dismissed them immediately.
Their conversation came to a lull both deep in thought.
“How did you become a spy?” Draco knew about that just in the end, never having the chance to ask that question then. He felt slightly betrayed to hear that from Potter at the funeral.
Why did he never bother to get him out too?
But he could answer this question already, couldn’t he?
Snape couldn’t trust him back then, he never showed a tendency to betray either Voldemort or his father, he played proud of his mission that destroyed him. He still looked down on everyone even as a half breed. Pretentious prick.
“I was blended by the promises offered to me until I saw the ugly truth. At first I just thought it was just a political uprising until I saw the murder. It opened my eyes. My best friend and I noticed it together so we wanted to get out. But he couldn’t and I couldn’t leave him. He told me he found something out about the Dark Lord that will bring him down. He didn’t tell me what and then he died. I was desperate so I went to Dumbledore and told him everything I know and asked for his help. He enrolled me as Potion teacher and ever since I played spy.” He never saw Snape so vulnerable.
“I never had the strength to walk away or do that. I’m sorry about your loss.”
Snape made a choking sound, Draco pretended not to hear.
With a deep sigh he put two glasses on the table and a bottle of firewhiskey, filling both two fingers high.
“I’m eleven.”
“I thought you were 18?”
“Oh, Yess thank Merlin! You actually got a point there …” he grabbed the closest glass and took a sip. He had craved a strong drink since he woke up in his childhood room. The burn was soothing and even surprisingly his small body could handle it, he remembered the first whiskey he had. He had choked and coughed, it was embarrassing, but not this time.
“Being a spy made the things I did more bearable. I just thought - if you do that you can tell Dumbledore later and try to stop worse things from happening.” Snape looked at the bottom of his tumbler, deep frown on his face. “Still couldn’t stop him from killing her.”
“I was just thinking about my mother, at moments I didn’t want to survive.”
Silence took over them, both in memories of their respective wars.
Way after curfew Draco made his way back to his common room, irritated that instead of just walking a few corridors he needed to get up high in the towers. Snape had scribbled him a note excusing his late wandering. He just drank that one tumbler but his body is small, so he could feel a little buzzed. He was rather happy to have someone to relate to and someone not treat him as a small child. Someone to trust.
He just made it to the portrait and said the password as there were 4 children sprinting at him.
“Draco what are you doing up?” Hermione asked, clasping her sides and breathing heavily.
“Really Granger, you want to reprimand me about being out after curfew?” he raised his eyebrow, watching Granger, Potter, Weasley and Longbottom catch their breath.
“What the hell was that?” Longbottom squeaked, ignorant to the fact that Draco stood next to them.
“What is more intriguing is what it was guarding. Did you not see where it stood?” Granger, still clutching her side, was able to breathe normally again.
“What is guarding what?”
“None of your fucking business, Malfoy.” Weasley snapped, as always spewing venom.
“Whatever?” he rolled his eyes making his way to the boys dorm, hoping not to sway too much.
So, the golden trio is already up to their annual adventure. Good for them.
That was definitely not jealousy he was feeling.
Definitely not!
Notes:
Lovely comments and Kudos are very much appreciated.
Chapter 9: Of course Dumbledore is there
Summary:
My beta reader made me aware that the Greengrass sisters are not twins, I will leave it like that for my story. Daphne and Astoria are Twins and in Draco's year :)
Big thank you Claunsstar for helping me write this story better :DAlso a big thank you to everyone who gave kudos and left comments, I appreciate you!
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
He smelled blood, he tasted blood, disgusting. He remembered chasing after rodents. Ugh he ate rats.
His body hurt but it was better than the last in this timeline, so the potion actually worked.
Moving still hurt, looking around he recognised the place Severus took him yesterday, the shrieking shack.
Draco made slow process to the mattress in the room. This time he didn’t hurt himself, no new scars. His head hit the filthy pillows and he fell asleep.
Hours later he woke to voices around him. Alarmed, he sat up, his wand raised.
In the room with him stood Severus, the nurse and Dumbledore. He didn’t lower the wand.
“You told him?” his voice was even higher.
“I assure you Mr. Malfoy, your godfather had all intention of keeping his promise, but you see if something, excuse my words, dangerous is in the proximity of my students I am to be informed. I got a report of the shack being haunted again, you excuse my inquiry.”
He hated the calm and collected demeanour of Dumbledore, he didn’t even crack as Draco pointed his wand at him, the last time in the astronomy tower, with intention to kill.
“And what now? You tell my parents? You will kick me out of school?”
At the mention of his unknowing parents, he got a reaction from the headmaster, a small shocked expression crossing his face.
“I have no intention of doing any of that. My intention was just making sure every one of my students is safe.”
Draco lowered his wand.
“Now how about Madame Pomfrey checks you over, she actually has experience with working with werewolves.” He nodded to the healer.
She approached cautiously, Draco keeping his eyes on Dumbledore.
He was put in the infirmary under his protest. But the petite Madame Pomfrey was quite intimidating. He didn’t remember her like that
She checked him another time, in his bed, over. She fixed his finder nails that were splintered and small injuries he didn’t even notice.
She is handing him a sleeping potion and looking relieved when she didn’t find more injuries with him.
“If you have any questions regarding your condition, I will be happy to answer them, when I know the answer, that is.” She was silent for a long time looking at him, he was shocked seeing tears in her eyes. She squeezed his shoulder, much more tenderly than any of his parents ever had.
Draco loves sleeping potions. They make nightmares hard to appear, dreamless potions were even better.
He actually sleeps the whole day, Pompfrey informs him that he got excused from classes, she asks about his favourite food and let it be sent to him from the kitchens.
He had never spent much thought on this person, the one time he was in the hospital wing he just felt brushed aside. In retrospect he can understand he made a spectator out of himself and played his injuries way more up than they were. But now requiring actual medical attention he just wants to leave. His life is full of ironic contradictions.
He got released late in the afternoon, most of his lingering lesions were aching muscles. He could handle that.
He had instructions to go to his own bed immediately and rest a while more.
Something he was glad to disobey.
He made his way to the library and was immensely relieved to see his table already occupied. Never would he have thought he would enjoy the sight of the big and frizzy hair.
She was furiously scribbling on parchment. Draco lowered himself slowly on his stool, muscles protesting.
“Would you be able to lend me your notes for today?” Granger, just noticing his presence, looked shocked.
“Draco? Are you alright?”
“Just felt a little under the weather.” He shrugged, “So Herbology and Charms today, right?”
She put the notes in front of him. She even went so far to explain her notes, apologizing repeatedly about her disorganising note taking.
Her notes in Herbology were even more chaotic but if you see her method once you can puzzle it out.
Maybe Draco should ask Longbottom about his notes, wasn’t he a prodigy back in his time?
They worked together till dinner, this time not in silence. They asked each other questions and helped with their essays.
Draco really is making a friend. Today he can’t find it in him to care. He actually enjoyed her company, she was so intellectual, and this time it was not competition but cooperation.
The next few weeks went by like a blur. Draco sat with Blaise and Theo every time he got the chance, he observed how Vincent and Greg found their own way, without him using them as bodyguards. Vincent made friends with older students like Marcus Flint, Greg got closer to Millicent and the Greengrass twins, he also did better in class, which pained Draco to say - surprised him. Pansy wasn’t as glued to him as before, but every time they talk, she would do this stupid thing she called flirting. Blaise and Theo were just as he remembered, that was a relief. He even got to know them better, they were actually people with character, who would have thought. Blaise was still vain and flirty. Theo was surprisingly funny, very dry humor but if you listen carefully you could understand it. He never had so much fun with them when they were roommates. Sadly they now had lesser time together.
He got friendlier with his new roommates as well, at least with everyone except Weasley and Potter, who now held a grudge because of the remembrall thing. Even though that secured Potter a place in the team. Talking about ungratefulness.
Draco couldn’t keep his curiosity in check and asked Thomas more about football, quite a confusing sport. But Thomas took his interest positively, so he found himself some days next to Thomas and Finnigan at meals. They made surprisingly good dinner company, if Finnigan could keep his wand in his pants.
Draco also found himself partnered up with Longbottom in Potions. He had helped him a few times in single assignments and when it came to form a group, he had a nervous Longbottom asking him to partner up. He couldn’t say no, apparently, he had a soft spot for the awkward boy.
It also amused him seeing Severus award points to Gryffindor, he could see it pained him, he was the only one knowing in another time those points would have landed in Slytherin. Especially since Longbottom didn’t lose Gryffindor any points, but that he didn’t know.
With Granger he now had formed a study group, the no talking at his table rule being banned. He noticed that Theo came a few times over at his place to talk or ask questions about their assignments, but as soon as Granger sat down, he would excuse himself.
He knows that Theo’s father was a death eater in both wars, but he always thought that Theo stood rather neutral towards it. He reassured himself with the knowledge that Theo didn’t grow up to be a death eater.
Surprisingly he enjoyed his time with Granger the most.
Who would have thought that?
Her intellect challenges Draco to think out of the box and in more directions than the given way. No wonder she always was top of the year, and grew up to be the brightest witch of their time.
The next full moon came faster than he would have thought. The days leading up to it he couldn’t sleep, although it got colder, he repeatedly woke up soaked.
After another fitful night he stood up and went to the bathroom. He changed into another pair of pyjamas and splashed water into his face, to cool down.
When he returned to the dorm, he saw a small figure sitting in the window. Catching his curiosity he made his way over, too late he saw it was no other than Potter.
“What are you doing, Potter?” missing the venom he thought would be there.
“Can’t sleep, what about you?”
He could say so much but he found himself telling the truth.
“Nightmares.” Against his will and better judgement, he sat down next to him. He had always felt a strange pull to the other boy, apparently, he couldn’t resist it anymore in this timeline.
He could feel Potter studying him, he returned the look. Those damn green eyes.
“I get them too.”
There was a long silence between them.
“Homesick?” Draco asked after a while, causing Potter to laugh.
“No, oh god, no. More the opposite.” He looked back at Draco and seemingly tried to figure him out. Good luck with that.
“I am thinking about my parents, how they were here too, here at Hogwarts. I never had much that reminded me of them. Now I have Hogwarts. I think I still can’t fully process it. Me being here, away from the Dursleys.”
Draco never had given much thought about it, Potter growing up amongst muggles, how that made him feel.
Draco didn’t need to ask the question Potter seemed to see it in his face.
“They’re the family I live with. My mother’s sister and her family. They are muggles. I didn’t know I was a wizard until Hagrid told me.”
Draco noticed how he didn’t say, my family.
“You didn’t know? One of the most popular wizards in our society didn’t know he was a wizard before a half giant told him?” Draco could resist laughing “how ironic.”
Potter grinned back at him and there was a weird prickle on the back of his neck. They kept looking at each other and with each passing moment the prickle grew and Draco got more uncomfortable.
“Well now you know, and you can live the life your parents would have thought for you.”
No answer from Potter
“I will try to get some more sleep. You should do the same.” He got up and walked over to his bed, very aware about Potter doing the same.
“Good night, Draco."
Notes:
Please leave a comment and tell me what you thought :)
Chapter 10: They apologize?
Summary:
“Troll — in the dungeons — thought you ought to know”
Chapter Text
The next full moon was better than the last. The potion started to have more effect on him, he was still not able to just roll up on the moldy mattress and sleep.
He had more control over himself but he was restless and everything smelled so interesting, so he kept roaming the small room over and over. Never finding anything new but still moving.
This time he didn’t wake up to Dumbledore seeing him in his most vulnerable state.
He woke to a gentle knock on the poor excuse of a door. He made a sound that could be translated to ‘come in’ and Madame Pomfrey walked in.
He wasn’t bad off, and he was able to convince Pomfrey to let him go to classes.
But he still missed his first lesson, he made it just in time to see the students exit the classroom.
He spotted Granger easily, she was just behind Potter, he came into earshot the moment Weasley said, “It’s no wonder no one can stand her, she’s a nightmare, honestly.” Granger shoved Potter and went crying past Draco.
“I think she heard you.”
“So? She must’ve noticed she’s got no friends.”
“Oi Weasley, you gotta be joking ,you spineless shit. What the fuck is wrong with you?” He stood very close to Weasley now, who immediately lost every remorse on his face and went into full rage. An understandable reaction for a Weasley when confronted by a Malfoy, honestly how far back did this feud reach?
“What is your problem, Malfoy?”
“What is my problem? Oh that’s rich Weasley. I didn’t just make a girl cry. Do you feel better about yourself now?” Weasley did have the heart to look ashamed, but then Draco was always able to push Wesley’s buttons “You will apologize to her!”
“And why should I? Everything I said was true! She is an insufferable know-it-all.”
“Ron! Draco!” Both boys looked at an angry Potter. “you both are totally out of line! Ron you will apologize to Hermione and Draco you will apologize to Ron!”
“What should I apologize for?” Draco asked bewildered, those green eyes blazed in anger.
“The way you talked to Ron was not nice either.”
“Oh Potter, I am not nice, but you are supposed to be nice. You are Gryffindor’s, you are supposed to be brave, talking shit behind a girl’s back is the opposite!”
“Defending your little girlfriend?”
“At least I would be able to get a girl.-”
"Arranged marriage doesn't.-"
“Both of you shut up!” again they looked both stunned at Potter. “How about that - Ron apologises to Hermione, and then you will apologise to Ron?”
Draco didn’t know Potter was such a Diplomat.
“If Weasley ever gets the balls to do it, I will.” Sneering at Weasley he turned on the spot and walked to the next class.
Granger didn’t make it to the next class or the class after, Draco kept sending daggers in Weasley's direction, who had at least a mind to look guilty.
Today was the Halloween feast and Granger would miss it because of that dimwit Ginger.
At dinner Draco finds out that Granger apparently hid in the girls bathroom crying all day.
He shot Weasley a look and before he could say something nasty, Quirrel stormed into the Great hall.
Draco totally forgot the droll in the dungeons. And sure enough Quirrell screamed, “Troll — in the dungeons — thought you ought to know” and fainted.
And Panic ensured.
They got ushered out by their prefects. Draco tried to find those two dimwits and promptly walked into Potter.
“Granger!” He said in a low voice, grabbing both boys by their elbows.
“Yes, I thought the same! She doesn’t know about the troll.”
“Percy’s better not seeing us”
They made their way to the girls bathroom, when Draco was suddenly yanked behind a Statue.
“Wha-“ Potter clamped a hand over his mouth stopping whatever protest he wanted to make.
They watched Professor Snape walking, in his brisk steps, past them.
“Wuahhh, what the hell Draco.” Potter screamed and wiped Draco’s salvia onto his robes.
“Never do that ever again!” Draco hissed.
“Guys! What is Snape doing here? All the other teachers went down in the dungeons!”
Against Draco’s will they spied on Snape.
“He is headed towards the 3rd floor.” Potter hissed in his ear.
“What does that matter? Let’s go get Granger and go back to the common room.” He hissed back.
“What’s that smell?”
Before Draco could give a cruel comment. There was a sound. A low scuffling and grunting.
The Troll in all its four meter smelly glory. It looked so horrid it was hard to look away. It didn’t spot them, instead it walked into a room.
“There is a key, we could lock it in.”
“Great idea!”
“Terrible idea, honestly how dim-witted are you? This is the girls bathroom. We’re supposed to get Granger to safety, not lock her up with the troll.” Both boys went pale and looked at him in shock.
“Hermione!” both said in unison.
All three stormed after the Troll.
Inside they could hear Granger scream for her life, she looked pale and slightly greenish, her eyes were puffy and her face was blotchy from crying.
Immediately both foolish Gryffindor’s tried to get the attention of the troll off Granger, but all that did was turn the attention on them.
“Great now it’s charging at us.” Draco muttered.
To his absolute horror Potter jumped the Troll, sinking his wand deep in the troll's nose.
Draco drew his wand, he hit the troll with a Petrificus Totalus, it seemed to have no effect, too much mass. He tried a Stupefy next, same result. Potter is still sitting on the back of the Troll getting a free bull ride and Weasley chucking pieces of the former inner decor of the bathroom at it.
The attention of the beast was split between those two boys, it didn't pay no mind to Granger or Draco.
Granger was in total shock.
“Incarcerous” Draco screamed, thick ropes came out of his wand and wriggled their way around the troll's body trapping his arms and legs together, it stumbled and came crushing to the floor. Potter was lucky the troll didn’t land on him. He pulled his wand out of his nose, pulling long snot threads with it.
The troll kept tossing and turning, trying to get free but the ropes held.
Draco moved over towards Granger, he gently touched her chin, her eyes snapped from the troll to Draco and she sighed with relief. He pulled her towards the other boys and away from the tossing troll.
Just as the other boys wanted to ask about her wellbeing, Professor McGonagall, Professor Snape and Professor Quirrell entered.
Snape bent over the still wiggling troll examining the tied-up troll, his eyes met Draco’s, he raised an eyebrow.
“Excellent spell work” he interrupted the scolding of McGonagall.
“Professors, it was my fault. I went looking for the troll, I - I thought – I thought I could handle it on my own – because I had read so much about them.” She swallowed hard, holding her head high, “if they wouldn’t have found me I would be dead. Potter jumped on its back, Ron kept it distracted while Draco tried different spells to defeat it. There was no time to get a teacher.”
Draco could see the admiring looks on Weasley's and Potter's faces.
That ridiculous trio didn’t really bond over fighting a mountain troll.
McGonagall chastised Granger quite harshly. He could see new tears treating to spill.
She took five points from Granger for her foolishness.
After she sent Granger away she turned to the remaining three Gryffindor’s, Draco could have sworn her eyes lingered a bit longer on him than it did on the others.
“Well, I still have to say that you were lucky, but not many first years could have taken on a four meter mountain troll. You each win Gryffindor five points. Professor Dumbledore will be informed of this.” There was hesitation in her eyes.
“Mr. Malfoy, how were you able to perform such a spell? This is quite advanced magic.” She gave him a calculating look.
“I read a lot.” Was his answer.
She shot Severus a look, with a sign she dismissed them.
Potter and Weasley talked about how Granger saved them from punishment.
Draco stayed enough steps behind them to not get drawn in their conversation.
Entering the common room after them he noticed that Granger had waited for them.
“Oi, Weasley don’t you think you have something to say to Ms Granger?” He put an arm around her shoulders.
“Yes, Hermione, I am sorry for what I said about you in the corridors, I was just mad at you, but it still was not the right thing to say. I am sorry.” He looked genuine, and then his face split in a wide grin, “it was bloody brilliant of you how you lied to Professor McGonagall.”
Granger blushed and said something about the right thing, Draco let his arm down.
“Don’t you think, Draco, you have something to say as well?” Potter fixed him with a mischievous grin.
Draco could play dumb and just walk away, but something in those damn green eyes kept him where he was.
“Weasley, my apologies for screaming at you. I think I was in the right, but proper Potter does not agree.” He smirked at Potter.
To his surprise Weasley laughed out loud.
“You wanker.” There was no malice in his voice.
When the people around him played crazy like that, it was time to go to bed. The golden trio walked over to the mini version of the feast of the Great Hall.
Draco slipped away into his dorm, he was relieved to see his bed.
He had half a mind that the next time when Pomfrey insisted on him staying in the hospital wing he would oblige.
As soon as his head hit the pillows he was gone.
Notes:
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Please leave a comment
Chapter 11: First Quidditch Match
Summary:
TW:
Panic attacks and PTSD.I am no professional. The tricks and tips I use in this chapter are some that help me personally.
Notes:
Sending love to my beta reader, she is an amazing help Claunsstar
This chapter contains a little dramione baiting. Sry :p
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
As predicted the golden trio was now a unit.
As much as Draco liked to see the original timeline following important milestones, he felt a twinge that he had to learn alone again.
But he knows it is not supposed to be.
Granger is the brain of the trio, they need her.
Draco didn’t.
And he refused to get drawn into the golden trio. Not going to happen, as much as he apparently changed by being put into Gryffindor, he won't allow this to happen!
Not a chance!
To his surprise a week later he found Granger back at his table, his heart made a flip at the sight of this incredible frizzy haired girl.
He tried to play it cool.
"Hi."
Damn did he ever say hi?
He never said hi before.
"Hi." Granger had a wide grin on her face looking up to him.
She knows, she knows he doesn't say hi and he just made a fool of himself.
He didn't dare to say more, he just pulled his school work out and started.
"I think I didn't really say thank you before! So," she reached over to him, putting her hand on top of his, "thank you."
"Nothing to thank me for, if it weren't for those dimwits you wouldn't have needed saving." He blushed against his will at the physical contact.
She laughed too loud, hastily she put her hand over her mouth to stifle the sound, "probably true, but they are not that bad."
Draco just shrugged and they weren't mentioned again.
They fell back into their study rhythm.
And Draco was relieved, he kept his first real friend.
The first Quidditch Match was approaching and the news of Potter's position was out.
Draco contemplated long with himself if he would go or not.
He just didn't know.
He still felt like a Slytherin and rooting for Gryffindor was just not right.
But he couldn't root for Slytherin either, it didn't feel right either.
He could go as neutral, just watching a sport event without team attachment, but could he?
It was a surprisingly warm day for November. Draco found himself in casual grey robes in a flock of people streaming outside towards the Quidditch Pitch.
He turned three times around but still found his way to the Gryffindor stands.
He found Granger easily, to his, not really, surprise she stood next to Weasley. Still he made his way over. He could see the rest of his dorm as well, which was also comforting.
In what world did Draco live in that Dean Thomas and Seamus Finnigan were comforting presences.
"Hello" he made himself known.
"Draco, hi. I'm so excited to see what Quidditch is all about. Let's see if I will switch my football poster for a Quidditch one." Thomas grinned.
"I'm sure you will like it."
Draco made his way over to Granger's side, keeping her between himself and Weasley.
"What is this Granger?" He asked about the banner she was holding.
"Hermione."
"Excuse me?"
"Hermione!" She said, still looking at the banner waving her wand at it.
"I know that is your name, but what-"
"Then use it." She said looking up.
"I-" he never thought the day would come that The Hermione Granger would offer him her given name.
The girl he tormented all their school years.
The girl he called mudblood just for fun.
The girl he watched being tortured by his aunt.
The girl who had mudblood carved into her arm because Draco was a coward.
"We are friends now, and friends use their first name." Her friendly voice brought him back from his spiraling. He looked at the smiling girl in front of him, he never called this girl mudblood once and he never will, and he will protect her from the rest.
"So we are friends now, huh? When did that happen?" He asked, trying for his usual cocky self, his voice just quivering a little bit.
"Yes we are and there is no return available." She grinned broader, causing Draco to laugh.
"Alright, Hermione." He never said that name out loud before, he liked it.
He helped her with the banner, it said 'Potter for President' a reference he apparently didn't get. Thomas had drawn a lion on one side, and Hermione wanted the letters to change color.
"Why are you not wearing your Gryffindor scarf?" Weasley interrupted their work.
"Well since my heart still lies with Slytherin I couldn't betray it like that. What would my father say." He said, melodramatic.
"When you love Slytherin so much, why are you not over there then? Rooting for your wanna-be house?" Face red with anger.
"I can't annoy you as good over there." He smirked at Weasley, who looked stunned.
Suddenly he broke out laughing.
The teams walked onto the pitch and they were in the air soon after.
Draco couldn't believe he never noticed how dirty his old team played.
Well his attention back then was mostly trained on Potter, he tried not to do the same now, unsuccessful.
Marcus tackled Potter and got a penalty but that was the only consequence to their game. The beater who aimed for the heads or chasers who rammed others so they nearly fell off their broom got nothing. Yes Quidditch was a ruff sport but it still had rules, which they were certainly breaking.
Draco still tried to be unbiased.
Then it happened, Draco totally forgot about it, Potter's broom jerked around, trying to throw off its rider.
Everyone gasped and sat on the edge of their seats.
One violent move of the broom and Potter lost its balance, he dangled from it, barely holding on.
The Weasley twins circled around him, in case he would fall.
"-except powerful dark magic." When did Hagrid make it into the stands?
Draco's eyes snapped to the teacher's stand, he could see Quirrell fixated on Potter, the shy and stuttering Professor looked calm and focused.
"It's Snape!" Hermione next to him exclaimed, his eyes landed a few rows beneath Quirrell to his godfather, he as well was fixated on Potter, his lips moving.
Yes, ok that looked incriminating, but knowing what Draco knew it couldn't be him, he probably tried to counter jinx it.
Hermione pushed the binoculars at Weasley and made her way out of the stands.
The jerking and quivering of the broom got worse, it looked impossible for Potter to be able to still hold on.
Draco was rooted to the spot, he didn't know what to do. He could only watch Potter and hope he wouldn't fall, hope that he wouldn't die.
His mind unhelpfully supplied images of Hagrid carrying a limp Potter onto the Hogwarts grounds.
What are they supposed to do if Potter died right then and there?
Who would stop the madman?
He didn't notice he was hyperventilating until he felt a heavy hand on his shoulder and a gruff voice talking to him. He couldn't make out the words, his mind just replaying that awful moment everyone thought Potter was dead. The hopelessness he felt that moment.
"Draco, snap out of it. Harry is fine, look. He is back on his broom." Was that Weasley comforting him, why was he faking an irish accent?
He put his head in his hands, taking shaking breath after shaking breath, slowly the noise of the pitch came back to him. Jordan's energetic voice commentating the happenings on the field, biased as ever, but calming now.
His hands were still shaking and he tasted iron.
What the hell was that, it never was that bad when he got overwhelmed by memories. He dared to look up again Finnigan stood next to him, looking at him with his hand on Draco's shoulder.
"You alright?" a heavy irish accent, filled with concern, concern for Draco. He murley nodded. He didn't have an explanation for his hissy fit.
Looking up he saw the game back at its usual pace. Potter was circling above the pitch eyes searching for the snitch.
Draco looked back at his hands, he could still feel Finnigan's hand on his shoulder, his thumb pressing circles in his skin, it felt like too much and not enough.
A collective gasp from all-around him brought him back to the game. His heart dropped again, Potter was dropping at full speed to the ground, he pulled up just at the last moment, hands on his mouth he landed, broom clattering to the floor.
He spit into his hand, he spit the snitch into his hands.
"I caught the snitch." He hollers holding the golden ball up into the air.
All around them the stands erupted in cheers.
Draco still felt numb, he was led back to the castle by Thomas and Finnigan, who's hand was still on Draco's shoulder.
In the common room he sat down on one of the armchairs.
"My mum gets them too. Panic attacks, kinda nasty." He looked Finnigan in the face, no pity.
"I- I didn't know that's what this is." His voice sounded far away.
"So you don't have a coping mechanism? It's different from person to person. My mum just tries to breathe calmly, in through the nose and out through the mouth, and counting those breaths, and she always has some lavender on her, the scent is calming. It also helps her to focus on a random object around her."
He nodded, "I like lavender."
Notes:
Please let me know what you think, either trough a comment or visit me on Tumblr
I really enjoy reading your thoughts <3
Chapter 12: I just want to sleep
Notes:
everything read in books in this chapter is purely fictional
My lovely Beta-Reader Claunsstar is a big help.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
'-used in Rituals, spread wide among the tribes.'
A passing student startled Draco out of the book he was reading.
He looked at the clock, three hours later.
He checked the book infront of him, it was about plants found in South Africa.
It was very interesting and he enjoyed it, but why was he reading about it?
He looked at the other books around him, all about very different topics.
He fell again in a research loop.
It was recently happening a lot to him. He would start his research about time travel and then something would catch his attention and he would research further into this topic and there would be something that would pique his interest and so on.
He had exhausted every approach and every book, even the ones just mentioning time travel, he found nothing.
Absolut nothing.
Maybe he should write a book about it for the next poor bastard blasted into the past.
All he learned is that it is very dangerous, prone to accidents and no one was supposed to know so there wouldn't be any meddling with time.
A little to late for that.
He closed the books around him with a sigh, shuddering at the idea to put them all away.
His eyes fell back on the book of old and ancient plants used in Rituals.
He really enjoyed reading about it, even if it would not benefit him in his mission.
He put all the other books away, among them a book about goblins, he really had read about goblins for fun, wasn't Binns bad enough, and loaned the fascinating plant book.
He recently spent a lot of time alone in the library, his frequent study partners having better things to do.
Hermione was up to something with her dimwits.
Theo apparently was too busy too.
He made his way up to his common room, getting used to the stairs. It only happened four times that he was deep in thought and suddenly stood in front of the Slytherin common room, with no access.
Inside the Gryffindor common room was a tumult, it was two weeks before the end of term and Christmas holidays. The common room was decorated opulent, even the portraits were adorned in cheesy Christmas ornaments.
It was too cold to be outside so every resident of Gryffindor was squashed in the common room, it was exceptionally loud. Draco wasn’t used to it one bit and probably never will.
This time the Weasley twins did something. One stood on a chair, the other on a table and the rest was obscured by a loud crowd watching their shenanigans.
Draco was not interested, he went upstairs, putting his book bag down.
He noticed a letter on his pillow. The letters on it were neatly writing his name, it belonged to his father. He had frequent exchanges with his mother but since the first week in Hogwarts he has neither seen nor spoken a word to his father.
Dear Draco,
I am pleased to inform you that the Yule Gala will be held at the Malfoy Manor this year.
You are to behave in the utmost respect for your Malfoy blood.
An accompaniment has been orchestrated for you.
You will not embarrass us!
There will be no talking about your unfortunate sorting, and especially no talking about your recent company.
We also will be talking about that.
Lucius Malfoy
What a pleasant letter. Draco actually had been looking forward to Christmas at home. The Manor always looked like a fairytale.
He hadn't seen it for years and he missed it. The tall trees were tastefully decorated, the fairy lights glowing everywhere and the snow.
Yuletide was Nacrissa's favorite time of the year, she always went all out.
Usually the Yule Gala was held by the pureblood Family MacMillan. He doesn't know why they changed it.
Now his time will be sullied. Needing to play the obedient perfect little pureblood heir.
Well his father will be in for a surprise. Draco is a Gryffindor now, he still has trouble accepting it but he will not cower for his father anymore.
The gears in his head are already turning and planning how to embarrass his father the most.
He reread the letter, fueling his rage more.
The approved date for the Gala is most certainly Pansy. An aspect that wasn't that bad if Pansy wouldn't still want to be the future Lady Malfoy.
He had built kind of a friendship last time before coming out to her, that led to a more realistic friendship.
She was the only one to know him like that, to really know him, until he shut even her out.
What would happen if he would tell her now? They barely talk with each other now. That made Draco feel guilty, he should pay more mind to his old friends and shouldn't drop them like that.
He reread the letter again to get back on track.
The night was hard, he couldn't sleep.His mind couldn't shut down for a minute.
As resolved as he was to embarrass his father, his mind couldn't stop showing him how his plan could fail, the ways his father could punish him, the way everything could go completely wrong in the long run.
Would he get disowned, could he get broken down and follow again in his place. No matter how much he swore himself that he wouldn't go down that path again the more he doubted himself.
He felt like an 11 year old, insecure and scared.
At around three he gave up trying to sleep, he would go and ask Severus for a sleeping draught and if he already was down there he would try his luck to get a dreamless potion as well.
He pulled the curtains around his bed away. He looked around to see if his roommates were asleep so his missing wouldn't be noticed.
The curtains around Seamus and Dean were closed so he assumed they were in there, Nevilles were poorly closed so you could see him peacefully sleeping, and Weasley, not having any regards for decency didn't bother trying to close his own.
The last bed was Potters. The curtains were shut on one side, the other side looked hastily opened, and his bed was empty.
What was that dimwit up to now?
Would he go about without his trusting Ginger?
He tried to push those thoughts down.
What did he care what Potter was up to?
He prepared his bed to look like he was still in there, and made his way down to the common room.
It looked peaceful again, no mob of people being loud and obnoxious.
The shadows that were cast from the still flickering fire and the light coming through the windows were more soothing and gentle than in the Slytherin common room at night.
He really could feel at home here. He stood in the middle, taking everything around him in. The red and gold didn't look that tacky anymore. It had a warm and welcoming feeling to it, which increased every day he would come back up to it, after a long day in the library.
As loud as the occupants are, and as much as it annoyed Draco sometimes, he could grow to like it.
"Draco?" The silence and the spell broke.
Draco flinched, his head snapping around to the sound, hand on his wand. His eyes snapped to green ones.
"Potter?" His voice was awkwardly high.
"What are you doing down here?"
Potter sat at a windowsill next to the stairs to the boys dormitory, so he was right behind Draco.
He tried to relax and pry his fingers from his wand, but he couldn't quiet his mind, it screamed at him how he could be so unobservant, he could have been dead.
Easy prey.
A voice that sounded like the Mad Eye said "constant vigilance!"
He had laughed at that loony guy, but he remembered it later and kept that lesson in mind.
"None of your business!" His voice was very shaky. He took a deep breath, counted to three and slowly exhaled.
He turned around and left the common room and Potter behind.
"Where are you going? It is past curfew you can't be wandering around. You will lose house points."
Draco wished he could care about something as meaningless as house points right now.
"Then don't follow me!"
"Stop!" Potter grabbed his arm and pulled him back.
Draco who was still shaky on his legs, lost his balance, he tumbled against Potter. Both boys fell down, against a nearby armor bringing it down as well.
"Good job Potter, now the whole castle knows where we are." He tried to get up, "let go of me, you imbecile."
"Why are you always so mean? I didn't do anything to you! You are nice one day and then awful the next. And Hermione always says how nice you are! What is your problem?"
Draco still tried to get up, not answering him.
With a way to graceful motion Potter was on top and pinning Draco down. Creative Curse Word flood out of Draco's mouth, trying to get free.
"I tried to be your friend, but you make it incredibly hard, but I see how nice you are to everyone else! You befriended everyone else. So what is your problem with me?"
His face was hard, his eyes blazing, those green eyes just as hateful as they used to be, or was that not hate.
Before Draco could say anything he would regret, in any way, he was saved.
Ms Norris came around the corner and started to meow.
"Shit." Potter finally got off him.
Draco's relief was short lived then as soon as both boys stood Potter took his hand and yanked him in the opposite direction.
Away from Ms Norris and away from the common room.
"Potter. Let. Go." He growled, his panic and insecurity gone, replaced by irritation.
He didn't get an answer.
At the end of the corridor a light appeared, Potter slowed down, searching for an escape, finding none.
Snape rounded the corner, immediately spotting them, or rather spotting Potter.
"No regards for rules Potter. I shouldn't be surprised that you and Mr Wea-" his eyes landed on Draco, taking him in, still in his pyjamas out of breath and completely disheveled from physically fighting Potter off of him.
He raised an eyebrow questionly at Draco, and then his eyes landed on their still interlocked hands. Draco tried to let go, but Potter's grip was fierce.
"Is there an explanation for this blatantly disregard for the school rules? Mr Potter? Mr Malfoy?"
Draco had a decision to make, he knew he could get out of this with Severus, he easily could say the truth or say a number of things to him, nothing would put him into trouble. But the presence of Potter made it more difficult, he couldn't just say that he indeed had the intention to go to Snape, not without raising more questions from Potter.
"Sir, I apologize I didn't feel well and Potter offered to walk me to the Hospital wing." He was able to say that convincingly, convincingly for Potter, Severus knows he is lying. Potter looked surprised.
"Is that so?"
To their luck this corridor was actually a reasonable way to the hospital wing.
"Yes! We should hurry, so it doesn't get worse with him being out in the cold."
Draco had a hard time not laughing at the face their professor made, like he bit on something sour.
"Very well then. I will confirm with Madame Pomfrey if that is where you will end up." He moved on, and Draco was sure he hated him now. Siding with Potter and stripping him of the joy of ducking house points from Gryffindor.
He wondered what Severus was doing so late, what was going on?
It certainly wasn't a common teacher's patrol, not after three.
No wonder he was always in a foul mood, with the sleep deprivation he must have.
He felt a tug at the arm that was still attached to Potter.
"He just believed you!" He looked impressed, then a thought occurred to him, "is that where you were going in the first place? Oh that makes what I did so much worse. I already feel guilty about it. I'm sorry I followed you and you know. I'm sorry."
"Shut your face, Potter." He started towards the hospital wing. Their hands still interlocked, dragging Potter behind him.
"See that is what I mean. You just saved me from Snape and now you are being pissy again. You just could have told Snape the truth and I would be back in the common room with detention. So what do you want?"
That was a good question, what did Draco want?
How should he answer that question, he didn't want to be friends, he couldn't be friends, but somehow he always got pulled towards that stupid boy, with his stupid scar and stupid perfect green eyes.
Memories of their fights or more like Draco's bullying swam in his head.
Their relationship wasn't like that anymore, it wasn't that easy anymore.
They weren't enemies, two boys on both sides of the war, both thrown into the thick of it.
One famous for saving the world, one famous for bringing the world down.
Could they ever be anything else?
Could they ever be just Draco and Harry, Harry and Draco?
"I don't know." They had walked a lot without talking, so his whispered words were loud in the silence. "I don't know what I want."
Draco opened the door to the hospital wing, finally letting go of Potter's hand.
Draco made it just to the nearest bed when the door to Madam Pompfrey's office opened.
"Mr. Malfoy, what is wrong?" She immediately went over to feel his forehead, her eyes moved to Potter, "and you Mr. Potter?"
"I'm fine. I just helped Draco get to the hospital wing."
"Well, very kind of you, but you may head back to your own bed now. Draco is in good hands."
She summoned a vial, Draco recognised it as sleeping draught, delighted he downed it in one go.
He was so glad that she had experience in treating his kind, so she didn't beat around the bush and just gave him what he needed.
So after all this he finally got what he wanted. No time to think about what Potter wants from him. No thinking about Potter at all.
He felt the effect immediately, his exhausted body helping, and both were able to shut his mind down.
He got comfy and before drifting off he was able to hear Potter say
"Good night, Draco."
Notes:
As always comments and Kudos are greatly appreciated <3
Chapter 13: The Planning
Notes:
Well there I am again, sry for the long wait.
Fell in a writing block and then in a depressive hole.
But here I am, bringing a new chapter!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Should he, do it?
No, he really shouldn't.
But they were his best bet.
No, no, no bad idea.
Or was it a brilliant idea?
Well he could just talk to them, right?
No harm in talking.
He really shouldn't even consider this.
Draco paced back and forth.
The Weasley twins and their friend were sitting in the courtyard.
Yesterday he had the brilliant idea asking them for help with his plotting against his father, but now standing in front of the task he doubted himself.
What was he thinking they would never help him.
You are a bloody Gryffindor, get your Courage together!
With a deep breath he left the castle and approaches the three teens.
"Hi" his voice was high and weak, and again with the pathetic - Hi-, could he just for once not embarrass himself.
All six eyes landed on him, standing in front of them and having their attention made him want to run
away again.
To his astonishment they locked curious, like he was a puzzle they wanted to solve.
"What’s up, Malfoy?" no malice in his voice, he can't remember ever hearing his name out of a Weasley without
some kind of hatred.
He opened his mouth to talk but couldn't.
The twins started grinning.
"Pranks!" he said way too loud.
Twin left started sniggering, causing Draco's checks to burn.
"Apologize my outburst" causing the right twin to laugh as well.
Draco sat himself across of them, noticing a poorly constructed heating charm on the floor, he was tempted
to cast a better one, but he shouldn't be able yet.
He cleaned his throat to get back on track.
"Obviously you are known for well constructed pranks, and I would request for your assistance for my own."
That startled them but also got their curiosity like nothing else, he could say, could.
"Alright." left twin leaned in.
"Tell us more." their friend had a similar grin on his face. Draco couldn't remember his name, he only remembered as the commentator of the Quidditch matches.
"What's your name?" honesty goes a long way. That caused the boy to finally laugh out land at him, too.
"Lee Jordan." he extended his hand. What a crazy world, just getting handshakes left and right.
‘Pureblood but not sacred 28’, his brain immediately provided. Can't shake all old habits.
"Draco Malfoy." he accepted the hand, but not without causing them all to laugh again.
"I would ask who is which, but I doubt I would get the right answer." he turned to the twins.
"Maybe!"
"He's clever." they said simultaneously.
"Alright, back to your request. I am curious were this is going." Lee gave him a dazzling smile. Damn he really had a type in men.
Draco cleared his throat again to get back on track, and launched in his tale of his father und his disappointment in his sorting, he even went so far as to give them the letter.
He could see them get angrier as he went on, he never thought he would get empathy from a Weasley, nevertheless two, and from the twins even. Who he knew to be brilliant and, who probably would have made it in Slytherin without anyone even questioning it. Their ambition made it able for them to open a bloodzy joke shop in the middle of a war!
As soon as he stopped talking they launched in a discussion about dung bombs and spells for different blasting effects.
"That is were it gets tricky. The Gala can't be disrupted. My mother spent a lot of time and energy into it, and I am not ruining that for her, she doesn't deserve that. It is only my father who I want to target!"
"Indeed."
They were quiet for some time. He never saw the twins that concentrated, completely focused on the task before them. Even in the battle of Hogwarts they didn't lock like that. He studied their faces, wondering which of them is the one to die.
Luckily enough he couldn't even remember the name from his time, so even if he could tell them apart now, he didn't have the burden of knowing. That made him feel happy in a very twisted way.
"So more of a political stunt." Jordan got him back from his memories. “Your father has a high political standing. Target that and it will hurt him.”
"Yes of course, the answer is right here:" left twin took the letter back.
"So you just do everything he forbids you from doing." right twin leaned to his brother to read the letter again" and it should be with an audience."
"Preferably without him noticing so he is just confronted with the aftermath."
They were on to something, the gears started turning.
"So I just talk to everyone who listens about my sorting and my new best friend Hermione!"
"What are about Hermione?" a voice disturbed their working flow.
All four boys turned to lock at the golden trio.
"What are you doing with him?" Weasley asked his brothers, pointing rudely at Draco, the twins look as unperturbed as ever.
"Non of your buisness, little brother."
"Now move along, we need to talk to our new friend." The word friend startled Draco.
"But-" Wesley started to whine.
"No buts"
"Off you go."
"Hmpf" he stomped away, a confused Potter following.
"We wanted to go visit Hagrid, do you want to come along?" Hermione smiled sweetly at Draco while casting wary looks at the other three. It was apparent she didn’t approve of her friend to associate with trouble makers like the Weasley twins, sweet Hermione and her rules.
"No thank you, Hermione." the use of her first name made her smile nonetheless.
As soon as she was out ear shot Jordan moved in again, resuming their plotting as if they haven't been interrupted.
"And it would be best if you do it in front of reporters so your words are getting spread even more!"
"Maybe your clothes should be in gold and scarlet as well, so even if you don't talk to people they will know"
They kept plotting more, down to the smallest detail.
They stayed out there for hours, until the warming charm wore thin and they started to freeze. At that time they decided they would head inside instead of recasting the charm.
Somehow Draco ended up with them at dinner as well. They stopped talking about the Gala and started to recount past pranks they played on their family, classmates and teachers.
Draco was barley able to eat from laughing.
Students around them, probably friends of them joined in and told their tales as well.
Eventho most of the faces were familiar to Draco, barley any names were. He wondered how ignorant he could have walked thought the world to not even know the names of the people he played Quidditch against.
He had a great time but at some point when the immediate attention wasn't on him, he started to wonder which faces would die, which faces would get tortured, disfigured or bitten.
His brain really doesn't want him to be happy even just for a second.
Every time he tried to zone back into the conversation, the faces before him flashed to the battle of Hogwarts.
He couldn't stand it anymore and abruptly stood up. No one seemed to notice, except one of the twins did, the one sitting next to him, he couldn't even tell if it was ‘left’ or ‘right’ twin.
"You alright, Draco?"
Oh my, he was on first name basis with a Weasley, he couldn't even tell his name.
Was he the one who died?
He tried to get the picture of the corpse with the read hair out of his mind.
"Yes, just forgot something"
His legs carried him away. His mind still supplying him with pictures of dead people. Dead people in the great hall, dead people inside his home.
He could hear his Aunt Bella cackle as she stood above him alternately torturing with the cruciatus curse und legilimentis.
He couldn't register anything around him anymore, he doesn't know where he was anymore.
'Panic attack!' a voice said.
'...long breath in, hold 1-2-3, and out...'
he tried to listen to the words, tried to use them to get himself out of it, where ever he was.
Slowly his vision started to clear.
His whole body started to tingle, he couldn't say if he was sitting, standing ore still walking.
The voice still ordered him to breath and he complied.
After sometime he couldn't tell how long, he could feel his body again, his eyes focus on the face of the voice and the faces of the dead disappeared again.
"... 3 - and slowly breath in..."
The change in his manner was apparent. A vial of something he couldn't identifier via smell was pushed against his lips.
"Trust me Draco, this is a special potion, I invented to battle PTSD." Snape tilted his head carefully und Draco opened his mouth. The potion tasted like strawberry honey.
Without any say in the matter he started to cry like a little child, well he is supposed to be a little child. The relieve of the potion washing over him. Severus, as awkward as he is, tapped his shoulder three times.
“It’s fine. Tears of relief.” He sniffled.
Severus placed a vial of opalescence purple liquid in his hands.
“If that happens again drink this. You should drink it only before a episode, otherwise it might have a very different effect. It will calm you down and put your mind to ease, if you are in a panic state, if not it will cause you to be hyperactive, everything will be louder, faster and will trigger another episode, so be careful in it’s use. And maybe after consumption you should also come to me, I only tested this potion on myself. So we should keep an eye on any unwanted reactions.”
Draco swirled the liquid around watching the way the light reflects of it. Tears were still rolling down his face. He could feel Severus shuffling uncomfortable beside him. He couldn’t blame him, he wouldn’tkniw what to do either.
“Do you want to talk about it? I know we said no detail from the future but maybe you should talk about it.”
Draco looked at Snape’s face, very happy he never saw him dead.
“One of the twins dies.” His voice felt weak but actually sounded clear, “I don’t know which one, never could separate them, can’t now either. I kept seeing his dead face instead of the one in front of me. At first it wasn’t that bad I could ignore it and concentrate on the conversation we had but then in the Great hall it overwhelmed me. And...”
Snape left him time to finish his sentence, as it never came he continued the conversation.
“What was the difference between those two situations?”
It seemed like Snape knew and just wanted Draco to guess, which he wasn’t in the mood for so he just shrugged.
“I would say your episode is caused when you are overwhelmed by a large group of people. How many were you each time?”
“At first only three plus me and then there were 6 to 8 more people, I guess.”
They talked more about situations like that one, and Severus let him vent about his feelings and worries. He even complaint about the whole mess with Potter. Which to his surprise made Severus chuckle. He wouldn’t explain what was so funny. But it felt good to let all weight go for a moment and share it with someone. Severus was never in his situation but he could understand his feelings of living through a war on the wrong side and the terrible regret that burdens you. And that helped explain himself and feel understood.
The next few days Draco tried to avoid the twins, which was surprisingly easy, since their schedule doesn’t overlap a lot.
The only time they were for long in one place was during meals and he just could sit far away from them.
Hermione tried to interrogate him about their meeting but the answer ‘just chitchat' doesn’t seem to satisfy her.
Weasley was even more obnoxious he tried to get some answers out of him as well but every time he would approach, they just started fighting. It took everything Draco had good in him not to hex and/or curse him. After a few days they both seemed to drop their interrogation.
So, when he finally felt save and thought he could put it behind him. He found himself again in front of two identical redheads and their way too attractive friend.
On his way to the library the Weasley twins and Lee cut in his way, herding him like an animal into an abandoned classroom
No one answering his questions or to his protest, until they were behind a closed door, and then all three started to talk at the same time.
"Ok stop there I can't understand anything!"
"You are going to invite us to the Gala!" One of the twins blurted out.
"No! No, I won’t!"
"I told you he wouldn't like it!" Lee said casually leaning back on the teacher’s desk.
"Ok but listen, we will be the best guests!"
"The perfect guest!"
"Your mothers Gala will not be disturbed."
"Our presence will only bother your father!"
"Weasley’s and Malfoy’s hate each other!" Draco protested.
"Exactly!"
They kept explaining their genius idea to Draco until he could not, not agree with their twisted logic!
He couldn't believe they talked him into inviting bloody Wesley’s to his home. But here we are on the way to the Owlery, posting a letter to his mother asking for invites for some of his new friends.
He even made it clear that he was talking about purebloods without dropping their names.
Draco was relieved he went through their interaction without any awkward panic attack or other freaking out. He still didn't use the vial he was given and he hoped it would stay that way. But if Snape's speculation was in anyway true, he would have a hard time at the Gala.
A lot of people and a lot of faces he stood side by side during war.
What a fun time this will be.
Notes:
A big thank you to SuperCrazyGoat and BEaUtiFuLUwU14691970 for leaving lovely comments and bringing my motivation back. ily <3
Chapter 14: Moon Cookies
Summary:
A few scene jumps, hopefully not too hectic.
Notes:
Finished this one at last, took a lot of work. Wrote myself into a corner more than once, but i am finaly happy about it.
The lovely Claunstar was a great help :D
A big thank you to all the wonderful people taking their time to leave a comment.
I apreciate it so much <3 ily <3
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Twas the night before, they would go back home for Christmas.
He was bloody nervous.
The prospect of seeing his father did not put him at ease, not even the joy he felt to see his mother calmed him down.
So he found himself again unable to sleep. The full moon was two weeks away, usually a time his body would allow him to sleep.
But that would have been too easy, wouldn't it.
Somehow he didn't dare to get up. Afraid to walk into Potter again. His accusation repeated in his head.
-"What do you want?"-
This question flew around in his head again and again.
What did he want?
He didn't want to be here, he wanted to be back in his time. Shut away in his manor brewing in his war mistakes. Not having to do it all over again.
He wanted to be free.
He wanted to be loved.
He wanted to love.
He wanted to be Harry's friend, he always had.
The day Potter rejected his hand, his heart broke, he never admitted it but it did.
Potter was the boy who survived, a hero.
He hated Weasley for being able to befriend him.
It was so much more complicated for Draco.
But was it or did Draco make it more complicated?
-"I tried to be your friend…"-
Draco admitted he didn't make it easy for Potter, actively going out of his way to avoid him. But he couldn't fathom the idea of Potter wanting to be his friend. Even after he said it Draco couldn't believe him.
Why would a boy like Potter, so full of light and love, want to be friends with someone as damaged as Draco?
Draco couldn't breath, he tried to, but there wouldn't be enough oxygen in his lungs.
What was he supposed to do if this happens?
He couldn't remember.
His breathing grew more erratic.
Shit.
He sat up, folding in on himself, head in his hands. Tears started to stream down his face.
Stupid Potter!
The curtain rustled and a head appeared in a slit.
"Draco, are you alright?" Said boy clambered on his bed.
Green eyes, bloody green eyes.
Draco stared at those green eyes.
"I am sorry, I could hear you crying, are you alright?"
Did he never hear about personal boundaries?
If you hear a bloke cry, you ignore it.
Bloody Potter with his stupid green eyes.
Draco wanted to curse, but he couldn't form a sentence, his throat felt closed up.
His eyes were glued to Potter's eyes, his erratic breathing ebbed away, the tears dried on his face. He didn’t know how long they sat in front of each other, time seemed nonexistent.
"Are you nervous about going home?"
"Are you?" Draco's voice was not recognisable.
"I will stay at Hogwarts."
"You do?"
"Why would I go and spend my Christmas where I'm not welcome?"
Another stab from Potter.
Why was this boy turning everything Draco knew over? A hollow laugh escaped Draco, it sounded raspy and remembered him at the time after Azkaban, he hadn't used his voice in months and it had been raspy from misuse.
Even though he didn't want to show weakness in front of Potter he put his head back in his hands, at least he will conceal his tears.
"That is a bloody good question!"
"Is your father still mad at you because of your sorting?"
He couldn’t answer, he couldn't say anything.
How was he supposed to explain his situation to Potter, how could he explain the expectations put on him since birth.
How could he explain to him he once believed all the prejudice his father spewed, until he saw people dying, until he tortured people, until he sat in a cold and damp cell waiting for his sentence, not knowing if he preferred the kiss or a lifetime in prison.
Potter the silence dragging between them.
"It's difficult. Hard to explain."
They sat in silence once more.
Potter broke the eye contact, making Draco nearly whine from the loss, but he could keep at least a little bit of his dignity.
“Christmas was always the worst, all the cooking and the hour long sitting in the church. I never got any presents. Aunt Petunia always said I should be grateful enough that I had a roof over my head and didn’t need to sleep in the snow.”
“That's awful.” Draco could feel a dark feeling arise for those muggles.
Potter shrugged looking at his fidgeting fingers. He shrugged and said, “That's why I am so happy to stay at Hogwarts for the Holidays. It is quite literally magical.” Harry smiled at him.
“Well I hope you have a magical Christmas.”
They fell silent again, both smiling despite Potter's dark confession.
Something about the atmosphere made Draco open his mouth again, it wasn’t planned and he couldn’t stop it.
“Christmas is one of my favourite holidays, Mother and I always decorated the Manor. We would bake Moon cookies and I always would put way too much icing and sprinkles on them. Father would only eat those with too much on it, claiming they were the only ones carrying the true Yule spirit.” He smiled, happy he still had those memories of a happy time with his Family, he nearly had forgotten. Suddenly he felt awful sharing such a happy memory with Potter after he told him how awful his Christmas always was. But he found him smiling at him, no trace of jealousy.
That broke Draco again, Potter was just so pure, never having had a good Christmas and then needing to listen to him and just being happy for him.
Maybe he really wanted to be friends. Maybe Draco could just let it happen. And like a dam being broken Draco shared his drama with his father as best as he could. He told Harry about the family traditions he broke by just being sorted into Gryffindor, the expectations he had weighing on his shoulder. Harry didn’t seem to understand much but it felt so good just letting it all out. After his big rant Harry shared more about his Home life, how the Dursleys didn’t want him to attend Hogwarts and wanted him to just suppress his magic, how they had lied about his parents death.
At one point they laid down next to each other, Draco was so absorbed in their mutual sharing, he didn’t have any capacity to think much about it.
Pansy didn't shut up. She was babbling on and on about the upcoming Yule Gala at Malfoy Manor. There even were multiple newspaper articles talking about it. It was supposed to be one of the biggest happenings this year. Mother went all out, she invited nearly the whole wizarding society.
To his delight this meant Blaise and Theo were there too, maybe they could work as a buffer between him and Pansy. It also meant the twins could blend in better.
Currently Pansy talked about the dress her mother custom ordered for her from some french designer. The Greengrass twins were listening interested and even Theo looked interested.
The train ride couldn't end sooner.
Blaise seemed as bored as Draco felt, he was absently flicking through a Quidditch magazine, in Italian.
"Save me." He whispered over to Blaise in an attempt to get the boys attention on the other side of the department. He only sent him a wicked grin over his magazine.
He tried to listen a little more about fashion, but at Theos description of his new cufflinks and the girls swooning over it, he excused himself.
He actually meant to get out at some point to look for his favourite Gryffindor, hopefully he could talk with her in private.
He found her alone a few carriers over.
"What are you doing here?"
"Taking a train back to London." With a slight smile she closed the book she was reading.
"What are you doing on this train to London alone?" He sat down next to her.
She shrugged.
"So you decided to brood somewhere alone? Why didn't you come to my compartment?"
"I'm not brooding." She laughed, "and I know your friends don't like me." She said as a matter of fact.
At that moment the door opened and Neville stumbled in.
"And I am not alone."
"Hi Draco." Neville smiled. He smiled back and nodded in greeting.
He refocused his attention back on Hermione and the revelation she made.
"Did they say anything to you? Who said something?"
"No one said anything. I see how they look at me, and I know how they view people like me. It doesn't bother me."
On instinct he took her hand, she looked surprised and a slight blush settled on her cheeks.
"Whatever it may be. They are wrong! Alright, it doesn't matter what your heritage is, what your blood status is. You are an incredibly talented witch and that is all you! You earned it all by yourself, no family name to rest on. So if they give you shit, I will let them eat it."
She looked stunned.
"Understood?"
She nodded.
"Great! So back to business." He produced a silver wrapped parcel and handed it over to her. Laughing, she produced one as well. It was square and wrapped in colourful dotted paper. Rather obnoxious, but Draco enjoyed it, he never received such a horrendous wrapped gift. It was always calculated and way too expensive, obnoxious in a different way.
"I wanted to give it to you after Christmas so I would see your reaction."
"Let's open it now." Draco winked with a wicked grin. Neville gasped, scandalised.
They looked at each other and simultaneously tore the paper open.
He held a book in his hand.
"It is a Muggle book. My favourite, I think you would enjoy it." She smiled sheepishly.
"Thank you." Without thinking he grabbed her and hugged her tightly. Never had he got such a present, so personal and with love. It was a used copy, probably Hermione's personal one.
He fought the tears down hard.
He really got soppy in his, again, young age..
"You are welcome." She hesitantly hugged him back.
"Now I feel like a dick because of my present." He sat back down.
"What? Why? It is a very pretty quill, and must have been expensive." She said unsure.
"Well it is charmed, so the writing always comes out neatly." He couldn't keep the grin in. He felt so happy, bubbling in his chest.
She looked scandalised, "my writing is not that bad!"
"Chicken scratches."
"How dare you?" She shrieked but he could see the corners of her mouth irking up. She balled the wrapping paper up and threw it at him. With ease he caught it and threw it back. It bounced off her head to Neville.
All three dissolved into giggles.
"So what are you two up to during holidays?"
"Oh my family goes skiing every year. We fly to the Alps, we have family there and we visit them and I love skiing."
She got very confused looks back.
"How do you fly? Your parents are Muggle, aren't they? How can they fly?" One of them asked.
"Skiing, what is it?" The other one asked.
"I- eh-" she launched into an elaborate explanation, earning more and more confused looks and questions.
The train ride went faster to an end than Draco would have thought. He was laughing and eating sweets with Gryffindors. At some point Seamus and Dean joined them and it got louder and boisterous and Draco didn’t really mind. He was enjoying himself.
The festivities were in full swing.
Draco had his hair slicked back in old Draco Malfoy style.
He didn't realised how long his hair grew out. He actually liked it, it started to curl slightly, which he enjoyed, he just couldn't think about the resemblance to his Aunt Bella, he needed to focus on the resemblance to his Mother, even though She never wore her hair curly any more. The only way he knew nearly everyone one the Black side had curly hair was from old family photos his mother still had and showed him sometimes. Telling him tales of his Aunts and Cousins. He envied her, growing up with so many siblings and cousins, always wanting that for himself. Only understanding why he hadn't during the second war.
This year his mother went all over the top. In every accessible room stood a tree, tall as the ceiling, opulent decorated, every surface is covered with snow or some other Christmas ornaments. It still was tasteful, as elegant as his mother.
Who was the star of the evening, dressed in the most expensive and lavish dress he had ever seen, you couldn't take your eyes off her.
Seeing all her hard work and her passion made him second guess his plan.
But the gears were already in motion, he had transfigured his dress robes, which were supposed to be matching colour and style with his mother and father, to be Gryffindor red with gold trims and accents. He actually thought he looked rather fetching. Normal people would say it was tacky, but he still was a fucking Malfoy and nothing ist to much for a Malfoy.
Currently he was in a conversation with an old hag who kept telling him how much he grew and how handsome he got. He had no memory of ever seeing her before.
Next to him, the gorgeous Pansy, clashing terribly in her pastel lavendel dress with him.
She smiled and nodded politely at all the things the grown ups said.
He couldn't concentrate on the old people. He kept staring at the nearby clock, anticipating the time they determined for the twins' arrival. 28 mins to go. He hadn't had a chance to do a lot of his planed stunts yet. But the twins were right.
Them showing up to a bloody Malfoy Gala was perfect.
He wasn't spotted by his father yet, and mother only raised her eyebrows at him but didn't say anything else. It was nice, because he could foul himself and pretend it was because she supported him.
He hadn't noticed any other reaction yet.
He still needed to talk to more people, preferably more bigoted folk. should be easy to find.
Five minutes before his meetup with the twins he excused himself and left Pansy behind, not feeling proud to leave her with them.
He ditched some other old hags and made it to the sun room which was not open to the guests. He only waited five minutes before the fireplace spit out a red headed one. Still no idea which one was which.
They actually cleaned up quite nicely.
They were wearing old dress robes Draco stole from his father and slightly allerted them to fit them better, and that they did.
He couldn't afford a bloody crush right now.
With a swift wand move they were cleaned from the ash and soot of the fireplace.
"Woah! You really do live in a bloody mansion!"
"And you didn't even see the rest yet." Draco chuckled, as much as he always made fun of the poor Wesley's, he didn't really want to brag now.
"So do we need to go through what you will say and do?"
"I really would like to know that actually!"
Draco's beautiful divine mother stood in the door.
Notes:
tell me what you think :)
Chapter 15: Yule Gala
Summary:
Finally the Yule Gala
Notes:
This Chapter was surprisingly tough for me to write, I rewrote it about three times.
I am more or less confident about this attempt.
Usually I would abandon a work at something like this, but I couldn't with this wip.
One because of all your incredible support!
Especially
BEaUtiFuLUwU14691970
PittPensPats
sir_burnsalot
I reread your comments to keep me going, I don't care how pathetic that sounds!
I love U!
Two because I am surprisingly proud of it and have a lot more to tell in this story!
So I hope the next chapters will flow smoother from here on!
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"Mother" Draco recovered fast from the shock, his upbringing kicking in ''let me introduce. Mother, this is Fred and George Weasley," the left one nodded at the name Fred, Draco tried to remember that." the friends I asked you for the extra invites. Fred and George, this is my mother Narcisse Malfoy. "
"It is a pleasure to meet you, Lady Malfoy. You have a lovely home" the one closest to them, George spoke and held his hand out. Narcissa took his hand. And to Dracos horror he bowed down and kissed the back of it. Causing Narcissa to laugh.
"Thank you for the invite, we are delighted to be attending such a significant function. Draco was telling us such great things about it." Fred copied his brother's gesture.
"It is my pleasure." Narcissa smiled.
Draco couldn't place the look on his mothers face, she mustered the twins and her son.
Fortunately Narcisse said not much more, just escorted them back to the main rooms.
Draco was sure his mother knew he was up to something, but he didn't know why she didn't stop them.
The three Gryffindors started with a little tour of the Gala, showing off his mothers work.
They made it through the room with the dance floor without disturbances. But as soon as they got closer to the beverages and the buffets they got flagged down by a rather large group of very old women. Who immediately started commenting on their appearance, lucky for them it was mostly compliments.
"So dear young Lord Malfoy, why don't you introduce your handsome friends to us. Don't be shy, or otherwise I will keep the 'good fortune'!" all of them started cackling.
"Of course mam, my manners. These are my friends Fred and George Weasley!
That shut them up, one unfortunate old woman was in the middle of a sip and was now coughing ferociously. There were stutters of "friends" and "weasley". A little more severe reaction than Draco would have thought.
"Why my dears have you been sorted into slytherin?" one asked the twins.
"No, I have been sorted into Gryffindor!" according to the following gasps they just found the right group for their plan, one even was grasping her pearls.
"I think my fellow old ladys are forgetting their manners. I am pleased to meet you and see friendships bloom from silly disputes. A blessed yule and some fortune for the young lords." a sturdy woman still with colour in her hair stepped forward. She handed each a heavy green pouch with a fine and delicate wine pattern on the fabric, letting Draco know the family relation.
"Thank you very much Lady Avery. I am very pleased to know some people still understand friendship. Happy Yule." The twins copied the Happy yule, looking utterly perplexed at the pouches.
"Ctynthia, I think you downplay it by calling it a silly dispute."
"Correct! It is a blood feud!"
"Oh darling, that was generations ago! Now it is just silly!" And that's when a whole debate broke loose.
Shocked, the three boys walked away.
"Blood feud?" Fred asked as soon as they made it to safety.
"Honestly, first time I ever heard about it."
"So much to minimal chaos." George gestured back to the group, somewhere now throwing their champagne flutes. More and more people got involved to seperate them.
"Well didn't that just go horribly wrong!"
"By the way, what's up with this?" Fred asked, gesturing to the pouch still in his hands.
Perplexed, Draco explained the tradition of old people handing young and pretty people 'good fortune' in exchange for youth and beauty. The good fortune was pouches full of valuables, mostly galleons.
They made their way to the other room, back to the ballroom, the dance floor was full of people.
"Draco Lucius Malfoy! Never, never leave me alone with those wrinkled old people again!" Pansy appeared next to him, interrupting his tale, and linked their arms. "They were talking about how good my hips look for child birthing. But sadly my breasts are not there yet. Disgusting old hags!" in that moment he saw the old Pansy, his best friend Pansy, feisty, strong and just so Pansy. He hoped he could keep that Pansy by his side, she often kept him grounded when his head floated too high. Not that he will encounter the same problem again. Feeling like more the opposite would be true, that he would sink down by all the weight he was carrying.
"That is honestly very disturbing! My apologies for leaving you!"
"You can make it up to me with dancing, a lot of dancing!"
Dracos protest died on his lips as he noticed the twins were gone. He looked around but there were no red heads visible.
Pansy pulled him on the dancefloor and that was that.
He just hoped the twins would be fine without him, they couldn't make it worse then they already did.
Right?!
"Well then let's move your child birthing hips."
"Draco!" she slapped his arm.
They danced for a rather long time, all the while Draco didn't even got a glance of the twins, he started to get worried.
Just as he was contemplating going to look for them Blaise appeared asking to cut in. Without hesitation he gave Pansy over. In his worries he didn't notice Blaise's disappointment.
He felt like he looked everywhere without the slightest clue, not even a hint that the twins ever attended the Gala.
He didn't imagine them, did he?
Out of nowhere there landed a big and heavy hand on his shoulder, his own being on his wand before he knew the owner.
And the owner was bad news, Evan Rosier.
He was the age as his father and just as much a death eater.
"Good to see you young man. Your father told me about your sorting. A little bit unfortunate, for such a fine man like you. Hope your head doesn't get filled with lies, from all those blood traitors."
The blood in Dracos veins froze, he gripped his wand as hard as possible, either to not hex the man or to calm himself down with the knowledge that he could hex the man.
In the old timeline Draco and Evan often got partnered up for raids and other missions assigned by the Dark Lord.
Evan had an incredible mean streak, he wasn't as cruel as his Aunt Bella, but he was pretty close.
Taking way too much pleasure in the suffering of innocent people, but surprisingly he had sympathy for Draco's situation, not agreeing with Voldemort's decision to punish him like that. His reasoning wasn't the right one though, it was regrettable that the only Malfoy heir was a halfbreed now and the pure bloodline gone.
He still showed him some decent respect at least, more than his father ever showed. Even Though he was the reason Draco turned once a month to begin with!
Draco was aware that he needed to leave this conversation as fast as possible, he could already feel his heartbeat increasing and his breathing getting shallow.
"Lord Rosier, I'm sorry but I don't know what you could mean!" He tried to leave but the hand didn't let go.
"I told your father he needs to improve your education of our traditions especially in a time like this!" with a quick jerk they were face to face, Draco could smell the whiskey and hors d'oeuvre on his breath.
Black eyes boring into grey ones.
"Don't forget your place! I saw your little friends, that was a stupid move little boy! You have no Idea what you are playing with! Better be careful, it would be such a shame to lose a pretty face like yours!" without waiting for a response he was gone, getting swallowed by the mass of people around them.
All at once the noise of the Party came crashing back.
Dracos whole body was shaking violently, every sound, every smell, every touch was too much. He couldn't breath and he feet sick, afraid of puking in the middle of the ballroom Draco ran upstairs, as fast as his stupidly small body allowed.
He just made it up one flight of stairs as his body collapsed.
He rolled up, glad he was out of eyesight and the noise was bearable.
What Evan had said wasn't that bad, barely incriminating himself with threatening Draco. But he knew the man, and he was mostly feared for his actions.
"Why is Master Malfoy lying on the floor? Does Master Malfoy need something? ", a small hand brushed hair out of his face. He knew that voice, having heard that voice all the time when he fell ill, that voice surprisingly meant safety.
"Potion, my room, my trunk." He barely got those words out.
A few seconds later a small vial was being pushed into his hands.
He unscrewed it, a whiff confirmed that it was the right one, with a big gulp he drowned it all.
The effects were immediately noticeable. His senses were still running high, picking up every smell and sound. But his heart rate and breathing ebbed down.
He opened his eyes and saw Dobby sitting in front of him, watching him with big eyes.
"Is Master Malfoy feeling better?"
"Yes, thank you!" he sat back up again, missing Dobby's eyes growing in size.
They sat in silence.
Draco was lost in memories. Gruesome memories, even though he mostly got around of torturing people he didn't manage to avoid it all the time. He was surprisingly proud that his cruciatus curse sucked. It wasn't painless but way less than the one of his Aunt Bella, which he had encountered numerous times. He could still see every face he ever cursed.
The potion gladly kept him from freaking out again but it couldn't quiet his racing mind.
"Dobby is very sorry, but Dobby has come to give Master Malfoy some bad news. Master Malfoys friends caused some trouble. Dobby thinks they should leave before worse things happen." Dobby played with his pillow case garment, too nervous to look him in the eyes.
"What?" he jumped up, causing Dobby to flinch, "where are they?"
His imagination supplied him with the worst case scenarios, all the while he could hear Evans' voice threatening him, mixed with the sound of a cane hitting something and a cruel laugh.
Without hesitation Dobby brought him to the kitchen, where both Weasleys sat at the counter, looking guilty.
They didn't need Draco to ask, both simultan apologising and explaining what happened.
Draco couldn't make any sense of their babbling.
Feeling rage and fear cursing through his body, his body which was way too small for all those emotions.
"Doesn't matter now, we need to get you out of here!" he interrupted their rambling.
Both boys looked sheepish and followed in absolute silence to the next fireplace connected to the network, which wasn't far and luckily didn't lead through the festivities.
"We are very sorry, Draco!" and like that they were gone.
Leaving Draco feeling alone and drained.
Evan was right, involving some Weasleys was a wrong move.
He should have laid low, like he planned from the beginning not getting riled up by his father.
He should have played the good and perfect son.
He should have just pulled the strings in the back.
He failed miserably.
Deciding to use the calming effect of the portion, still running through his veins, he made his way back to the Gala.
At first glance he couldn't see anything wrong, then he noticed a strong smell that burned like acid in his nose.
There were two burned Christmas trees, one was completely destroyed the other one was slightly singed.
He couldn't come up with any explanation how the twins possibly could have caused that.
If he had invited Finnigan he wouldn't be surprised, but Fred and George weren't pyromaniacs. Not to his knowledge.
Being completely done with the evening he got a bottle of some kind of alcohol and went upstairs again to his room.
He downed half of the bottle in one go, immediately noticing the effect on his eleven year old body.
His mind was still racing, he felt like a failure, but a very quiet voice in his head, that got louder the longer he was in this timeline.
The voice told him that he did nothing wrong, even without his ulterior motive, he just invited friends he made in his house. He shouldn't get threatened for something like that. They shouldn't shame him for being in a different school house than his family, it was only a school house after all.
He even stayed friends with his friends in Slytherin, he even got along with people in Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw, people he never even exchanged a word with in his old timeline.
If there was something they should say to him, they should congratulate him that he was able to look past school houses and build connections beyond that.
Did he just find himself agreeing with Dumbledore and his ongoing speech about house unity?
The evening couldn't get more bizarre.
Just as he thought that the door opened and Blaise, Theo and Pansy entered.
"Could have invited us to your after party." Blaise laid himself next to Draco and pulled the bottle to his lips. Pansy followed Blaise on his bed, but more carefully than Blaise.
Theo made himself at home at Dracos desk pulling a book out of somewhere.
Draco wanted to protest, wanted to tell them that he wanted to be alone, but before he even could think of the words, Blaise continued a conversation the three obviously had just before entering his bedroom.
Blaise ran his mouth about some witch or other, living in the gossip of the rich and famous. Pansy listened excitedly chiming in with the side of the story she heard.
Draco found himself leaning back, finding comfort in his friends' presence, gossiping like nothing else mattered then who wore what.
His mind caught up with the potion and the alcohol, it felt cloudy but instead of just shutting up it kept spinning circles, and it landed on a question, which Draco just asked without thinking about it.
"Would we still be friends if it weren't for our parents or blood status?" He interrupted Pansy's slander of someone's dress.
Draco noticed he didn't feel embarrassed at the question, just very curious.
"Merlin Draco, how much did you drink?" Blaise laughed.
Neither said anything after that, seeming to think about his question.
"I wouldn't. I think I wouldn't leave the library or talk to anyone." Theo's soft voice carried to everyone he addressed.
"Probably true mate." Blaise laughed, pushing him a little, "I think I would still befriend you." He winked, "don't know about you tho, mate." He looked at Draco calculating, taking in his slouched position, his ridiculous red suit, "probably wouldn't talk to a Gryffindor."
Draco heaved a sign and slid further down, nursing his bottle some more.
"That's what I thought." He sounded pathetic.
"I would still be your friend, Draco." Pansy smiled, turning more towards him and put her hand on his shoulder.
"No you wouldn't either." It didn't come out as he intended, it sounded sad.
That followed a heavy silence.
Draco felt pathetic, wasn't his day emotional enough, who even thought about asking such a stupid question.
"Good thing we are friends then, no matter the circumstances." Theo looked up from his book and looked everyone in the eyes, with a very hesitant smile, which was so Theo.
"Yes exactly!" Blaise threw his arm around Draco.
"What makes you so melodramatic, Draco?"
He shrugged dismissively, not really wanting to talk about it.
"You can talk to us, that's what friends are for." Pansy sounded sincere, and for once she talked to Draco like a human being, not like a love sick fool.
He took his time, looking each of his friends in the face, he was met with interest and earnesty, even Theo closed his book.
"I started to question everything that was teached to me growing up. About blood purity and elitism, the superiority of wizards over other magical folk. Everything I thought was true is starting to crumble."
No one dared to say something, no one dared to keep eye contact.
The silence between them stretched more and more. Draco started regretting ever opening his mouth, he didn't even dare to move. He wanted to walk away or at least get a new bottle. But the weight of his words put him in place.
"I think I never believed in it in the first place." Theo broke the tense silence, telling Draco he isn't alone.
"Why do you run away every time Hermione is near?" Where did the venom come from?
Theo flinched and averted his eyes.
"Because she is a bloody Gryffindor!" Blaise threw the venom back.
"What?" Draco wasn't sure he could process what he said, there definitely was more alcohol in it than he thought.
"Draco, the whole school hates Slytherin's."
"What?"
"Did you not hear the Weasley twins boo everyone who got sorted into Slytherin."
Draco vaguely remembered, but didn't think much of it, the time he got sorted into Slytherin he took it as a badge of honour. Apparently not everyone thought so.
"I constantly work alone in class because we are an uneven number of Slytherin's and not even the teachers would pair a Slytherin with a non Slytherin. The system is rigged. Theo gets barely any points for his right answers but Granger needs to breathe and gets points. Potion is the only class where it is even." Pansy crossed her arms over, she sounded genuinely hurt.
He didn't remember this treatment, well he remembered Potter and his entourage was favoured by everything but he honestly did not pay attention to much more.
"But you work with Daphne."
"Yes when we have class with you, because you pair up with Blaise or Theo and because you make it even."
He was stunned. He never thought that an issue, never thought his sorting would affect anyone but him. He felt like he mattered. The first time he felt like he made a difference and it was while letting his friends down. He felt sick. The universe or whatever power put him in this situation is a really sadistic bastard.
"I haven't noticed."
"Because you are a Gryffindor."
That was a slap to his face, he felt sober again.
Blaise managed to steer the conversation to idle gossip again, Draco couldn't listen. He tried to replay the last few months, and see it from another perspective.
Without much success.
'You are a Gryffindor. '
That sentence echoed in his mind long after he was alone again. He couldn't decide if he should feel offended or reassured or hurt.
He was exhausted, his day was very stressful. A whole whirlwind of emotions. No mention of what the next day will bring, the aftermath of his Yule Gala Prank. Facing his mother for the fire hazard he brought in her house and facing his father for everything else he did as not expected from him.
His body filled with dread and sleep felt miles away.
'You are a Gryffindor. '
Notes:
I don't care about canon that much, so yeah I know Evan Rosier is supposed to be dead, but I need him in this story.
So resurrection!If you would be so kind to leave me a comment, I would highly appreciate it. I can handle criticism, I promise!
Ily <3
Chapter 16: The aftermath
Notes:
Well here i am again.
Without further ado, next chapter
enjoy ^-^
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
"Oh come on Severus, just let me stay with you! You won't notice me at all!"
"Absolutly not! you will stay where you belong! Pulling Pranks on your mother like that! You know how much that meant to her!"
Severus walked in front of Draco, his Robes flowing behind him not slowing down to let Draco's short legs keep up.
Narcisse has rudely woken Draco up in the middle of the night. She hadn't said much, just told him to pack his things and then he was shoved through the floo, stumbling in Severus' study. who as well didn't say much to Draco. Those were the first words he mustered after a lot of whining from Draco.
"You know it was my father I was aiming for. It just got out of hand "
"That's what you get for inviting Weasleys. Honestly, what were you thinking?" that prompted him to stop and turn around causing Draco to nearly walk into him.
"What about keeping a low profile? Not changing anything? Have you thought about the consequences or have those Gryffindors fouled your mind? "
"I am a Gryffindor!"
After that statement both just stood there looking stunned.
Just like Blaise said.
It was the first time Draco said it aloud. The first time it felt true The first time it felt right.
In just a few weeks living as a Gryffindor he found his first real friends, he even got closer to his old friends, got them to know on a more human level, he was able to stand up for himself towards his father, he found courage in himself just because an old leather hat believed it was already inside Draco.
He was sure on this path he would find the best version of Draco.
Maybe there was an even more selfless version of him, would he have been sorted in Hufflepuff, maybe on another round.
" I see. " Severus broke the silence.
He couldn't figure out the look in the pitch black eyes out.
Disappointment? Sadness? Sympathy?
What Draco couldn't know was that those words were once again screamed in his face.
"Of course I thought about the consequences but I will never again fall behind my father, never again the perfect little son! Never again follow him." he raised his voice without meaning to, there was just too much emotion building up, his hand landing on his left forearm .
In the back of his mind he could feel the dread and the panic building, but for some reason he didn't want to break down in front of Severus again. Didn't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing him weak, seeing him as a child.
So he started to sprint the stairs up towards his common room.
He could hear Severus call his name a few times but he didn't slow down nor turn back again.
The burn in his lungs and in every muscle helped him to keep grounded. He really should keep up with his cardio if he wants to play Quidditch next year, his stamina was severely lacking.
He made it to the portrait wheezing, barely being able to give the password.
The common room was dark, the first rays of sunshine barely making it inside the windows.
Draco looked around, he barely left for a week but standing here again felt right.
There were no right words for it, but he felt good, happy even.
He couldn't believe how easy it was to just be somewhere, to feel like one belongs. Never would he have thought such feelings would arise by simple standing in an obnoxiously decorated tower.
His body slumped in an armchair. Being comforted by the smell and warmth he fell asleep.
* * *
A few hours after an uncomfortable sleep, he went down for breakfast. Noticing the first signs of a hangover.
He wouldn't have thought that his presence would be so spectacular.
Every head turned and stared at him.
Feeling self-conscious he quickly sat down.
In retrospect he should have paid more attention to where he sat himself, right in front of him sat Dumbledore, to his left McGonagall.
Both stared at him like the other students.
"Mr. Malfoy I am sure to recall you signed your absence during the holidays." McGonalgall interrupted the uncomfortable silence that had settled over the Great Hall.
"Well there were some short term changes." he didn't dare to look them in the eye, loading his plate with food instead.
There was more silence, which felt deafening to him. He could feel eyes on him, like spiders crawling up his spine, before he could snap at them, McGonagall pulled the attention back to her.
"Well Mr. Malfoy, would you please accompany me to my office to officially sign you back in."
With no other chance he followed his Head of House to her office.
He sat at the desk looking at his hands while the Professor rummaged through her stuff.
"Biscuit draco?” She offered him a tin with homemade yuletide biscuits.
He sullenly took a hand full and placed them next to the silently offered tee cup.
“I had a lot of students in my care in my life as a head of House, I saw a lot of different situations. Bullying from classmates, beeing the bully, self sabotage, causing disruptions in class or outside of them, difficult family situations and so on. And I pride myself on being able to always offer an open ear and some advice here and there. There was a student who came most often in my office, in the beginning by my invitation and as time went on he came on his own. He was very special to me. A troubled little boy who just always went in over his head. He had a temper of his own no self-regulation and he and his group of friends always caused some mayhem in the school. He came from a very unstable family situation. Just like you he was sorted into Gryffindor against all odds of his family, but as the had is rarely wrong he was able to find himself in my house and under my guidance. His family was disappointed and showed him just how much. But as it is he found his true family in his friends he made in his house. All this to say and all I mean is, if you ever need someone I am here and may also be able to help your specific situation. Not that I know what you are going throught but I will always listen.”
After her whole speech Dracos brain was scrambled. He felt like she could see through him could see all his issues he had hidden deep deep down. The new issues that were caused by his stumble with time and all the old issues he carried through a war. Was he that transparent he should have a better poker face by now.
His first instinct was to run and avoid ever beeing in the same close space than her but than the words sunk in. Cause there was something that was itching in his brain, some faint memories something stuck deep in his brain.
“Sirius Black” he couldn't even relish in the shock that travelled over her face, but just like the teacher she was she caught herself rather fast.
“I wouldn't have suspected that your familie would talk about him.”
Well they didn't, just in the darkest of nights, when everything his mother had tried failed to put him to sleep she would talk about him. The stories she told him at daylight with pictures to highlight who she was talking about. The name Sirius was always missing. Not in the ones at night, when draco had kept her awake for hours and she was exhausted. Then the full stories came out. The most silliest and not proper stories. The ones about singing portraits or flying teddybears or the flying teapots. Then two more names get dropped, Sirius and Andromeda. If asked about those names the next morning she vehemently denied ever to have spoken those names. But in nights like these they always appeared again.
Draco suspected that Narcissa took the saftey of the dark to relive her most happiest memories about her family. Which always had those names.
His father on the other hand did talk about him, just not by name but by offence. He often heard warnings when he played to ruff or slacked in his studies, that he should not end up like his disowned cousine. Well how times have changed
“you would have suspected correct.”
They sat in silence, he could feel her gaze analysing him while he tried to avoid her gaze and just enjoy his biscuits.
Her analysisng him felt way more pleasant than that of dumbledore he could not feel one tug at his walls in his mind. She just took in what she could see and what he would say. And somehow that felt more exposing, but yet more pleasant. It was like she was seeing him, seeing all of him. Not just his name, not just his attitude, not just what he brought to her lessons, not just his house. Just him.
The silence dragged on until he finished all of them and his tea.
He played with the idea to ask if he could be dismissed, when she leaned forward on her desk.
“How are the biscuits, my wife and I baked them just this morning.”
He lost his track of thought by the swift topic change.
“They are delightful, Professor.”
Her lips tucked up in a sort of smile.
“You want some more while I look for your papers?” He nodded and she moved the open tin over to him and started looking thought her stacks of paper.
He was dismissed short after having eaten nearly the whole tin. She didn't say more on his familie issues after that, which he was insanely glad for. But her words still stuck with him for the following days.
* * *
As is custom for the new Draco in this time, he spend the rest of the holidays in the library. Just reading for fun and getting ahead of his assignments.
He was glad that the twins, who appeared at school shortly after him did not avoid him after the fiasco at the yule gala. They were still tight lipped about what exactly went down there, but at this point he couldn't care less.
On the other side was his short and quick encounters with the other weasley more hostile then ever. Potter who was most of the time close by didn't pay any mind to their bickering. Which felt very off cause he played peacekeeper every other time they started going at eachother throats.
Potter seemed very off the whole holiday, not that Draco was paying him any mind.
He seemed lost in his own mind.
Maybe yule at hogwarts was not as magical as Potter had imagined.
Draco tried even harder to stay out of their way.
Which worked easily until it didn't.
Notes:
For all of you who kept commenting and asking for a next chapter.
I saw you!
I appreciate you immensely!
This chapter is for you!
Chapter 17: The mirror of erised
Notes:
I wanna again make it clear that I don't like Canon Severus Snape.
I believe his character is interesting but just badly written.
But since he plays a big role in my fic I explored him a little more.
So this is completely my interpretation of him and I will mold him how I like in this fic.
So it will follow a very soft and sweet (to Draco) Snape.
You are welcome to tell me how you like it or don't like it.
Chapter Text
Draco was out after curfew, he was very aware. After Ms Pince had kicked him out of the library he hid in an alcove somewhere until his eyes couldn't keep up with what he tried to read. He had read the book Hermione gave him about four times now and he loved it dearly. It felt whimsical and magical in its muggle way. All the muggle stuff that was described as ordinary felt just so out of this world for him.
He wanted to write to his father and talk about the new appreciation he had now for muggle ways of living.
He was lost in thought about using a telephone when a hand out of thin air grabbed him.
His wand was pointed at nothing. The arm that had a good grip on his biceps just ended mid air.
Before he could voice his confusion he was yanked under some sort of blanket.
And now he stood face to face with a delighted looking Potter.
“I have to show you something!” There was more light in Potter's eyes then the last week and his voice was high from excitement.
“Where the hell are we going, and what is this blanket over my head? Potter?”
He didn't get an answer and was left following.
He was shoved in an old classroom and in front of a very old and dusty mirror. The silver plate should really be shined, who let such a beautiful antique mirror become so dirty.
“What do you see?”
“What are you talking about? I see myself looking in a mirror?!”
But that wasn't true. While he knew his face must show all the annoyance he was feeling, his reflection just smiled back at him. It was a serene smile, a smile that was just on someone's face cause they were content. Not an over joyed smile, just content.
He could feel his face twisting in confusion but it was not mirrored at him.
His reflection just tipped his head and pulled his left sleeve back.
Draco inhaled sharply but his reflection arm was free. Free of that ugly mark and free of the ugly scar that was now visible on his arm. It was just a clean forearm.
He starred in absolute horror at the mirror.
“Draco? What? Ron and I were seeing happy things, I am sorry.”
There was again a hand on his arm, lightly squeezing. He was shaking like a leaf. His eyes left the mirror and fell on Potter's face, a face full of concern.
He ripped his arm free and started running.
* * *
To his surprise he ended up in the shrieking shack. He didn't spend a lot of time there and especially no pleasant time. He was rolled up on the dingy mattress, knees to his chest and arms wrapped around them. He was cold. The kind of cold that sits in your bones.
His eyes were trapped on his left arm. He didn't need to pull up the sleeve to know what was hidden. He didn't want to pull up the sleeve in case the mark was back, ugly and writhing under his skin, pulling him to a dark lord he never wanted.
There were tears running down his face and he squeezed his eyes shut.
Time felt nonexistent. Which was very paradox for some one who travelled through time. He didn't know when he appeared here and he didn't know how long he sat here. The sun peeked through the boarded up windows and disappeared again.
His mind was full and empty at the same time. Too many thoughts swirling around and not one he could catch. He lost all sense of himself.
What did it mean?
What did he see?
Was it some kind of other time?
A time where Draco was happy? Not just happy but content. Content and happy.
What kind of trick did Potter play on him?
Did he know?
Could he know?
“Draco!”
What was happening to him?
What did it mean?
“DRACO!”
Someone was shaking him, he could feel it but there was nothing more he could register.
Suddenly everything became blank and he was falling into the depth of nothingness.
* * *
He woke up to too much light, too much warmth, too much pressure on him.
He woke up to just too much.
He just wanted to be nothing.
“He is severely frostbitten. I could save his toes but just because I am that good."
“What happened to him?”
“How long was he out there?”
“All questions I can not answer. All I manage to do is make sure he will wake up again and his body will be unmaimed.”
“Thank you Poppy.”
“Urgh save it for your homelife!”
“Just look away!”
“SHUT UP!” Draco sat upright in his bed staring at his Professors and his school nurse. Their constant babbling was way too loud. He could hear every breath, every rustle of fabric every fucking thing in this stupid hospital wing.
“Draco!” All three immediately came to his bedside, they were at the other end of the wing, far far away for how clear Draco could hear everything.
The mediwitch immediately did multiple diagnostic spells. Making his nose itch with all the magic in the air.
Not helping his over sensitive senses.
Severus fell into a lecture about how dangerous his behaviour was, and how much trouble he put himself in.
“Was that a suicide attempt?” The question of McGonagall shut up Severus and gave pause to the assault of spells of Madame Pomfrey.
His already fried nerves got even thinner. All he could do was laugh. It was an unnatural manic laugh. He couldn't stop.
What an absurd question. If Draco wanted to die he wouldn't just wait to freeze to death. He made a point in voicing the absurdity of that question.
“If I wanted to die, Professor, I certainly wouldn't wait for the cold to do it. I would just tell my father I don't care about blood purity or that I am actually very intrigued by muggle culture, or that one of the closest people I consider as friend is a muggleborn and one of the best witches I know. Or you know just tell him I am fucking gay and will end the malfoy and black bloodline one and for all.”
“OK good to know, then what in Merlin's name did you put yourself through?“ McGonagall's stern voice was just as frightening than ever.
Memories of the mirror came back and he felt all emotions drain out of him.
“I saw something “ he couldn't keep talking.
The adults gave him room to finish, but how could he explain?
“Leave me alone with him.” Severus tried to save him. But both witches immediately started protesting.
“Please” at that they were stunned looking between the boy and the man.
After a while they both left without a word. A please from severus both never heard.
Draco didn't dare move, never had he heard his godparent talk so gentle.
Time passed and nothing happened, until the bed next to Draco dipped and a second body sat down next to him.
They continued to sit together in silence.
It was nice, Draco felt calm and his mind could work things out.
This was the most fatherly gesture he ever received from anyone. It was so nice just the company and the reassurance he had time and wouldn't be left alone with his drama. And that thought broke the dam, tears started streaming down his face and he started to babble, to tell him everything that happened to him.
Severus put a comforting hand on his shoulder. It was heavy and comforting.
Draco just rambled on, he wasn't even sure he made sense, but Severus did not interrupt. He gave him all the time and space he needed to let it all out.
After Draco let all his thoughts out, Severus just said, “That must be a lot, I couldn't know how you feel. But never disappear like that again. You can always come to me. With everything, even if I don't understand it. I am here.” The for you was not said but both knew it was meant.
And just like that Draco felt better.
To both surprises he went for a hug or in their current position it ended up to be more of a cuddle. Severus had not suspected such a gesture, and froze.
Just when Draco regretted his reaction, Severus put an arm around him.
In the warmth and comfort of this fatherly embrace he felt himself contemplating.
He never had an adult treat him like that. With that much kindness and so gentle. He never could go to his parents with any of his problems, which was why he confided in Severus in the first place.
Sure his mother coddled him and everything, and he never doubted her love for him. How could he, her motherly love, saved the whole wizarding world and saved them both from a lifetime in prison, after Harry talked in their favor in front of the wizgamont.
But even when she loved him so dearly, it was very conditional. He had to be a good son, he had to listen to his father, he had to do what his father said. No matter how much she loved him, she loved Lucius more. No matter how much she loved him, she couldn't save him from his father, from the dark lord, from grayback. Her love wasn't that dependent.
And his father was always distant. He never engaged with him in any meaningful way when he was a child, and after he attended Hogwarts all their time together was basically parading Draco around, showing off his perfect little heir. He never cared fro him. He never even knew who Draco was.
And his relationship with Severus back in his time, was basically nonexistent. He was his godfather and he was present in big life events, but Draco didn't care about him. All he wanted was his father's approval.
That has already changed in this time so much. He couldn't imagine what it would be without severus on his side.
He always knew he was an incredibly smart and talented wizard but he never appreciated it.
Now he enjoyed their conversation, enjoyed their time together. How severus would spark his curiosity and encouraged him to think outside the box.
This was what a father should be. This is how it feels to have a father who cares.
Draco couldn't help the next waves of tears. He cried because he was so grateful to be able to experience something like that.
“Thank you.” He sniffled into severus robes.
“What for?”
Draco couldn't put all his thoughts into words, he just hugged him tighter, and repeated his words.
The answer.
“Always.”
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