Work Text:
Chloe found it somewhat sad that she could divide her life into sections corresponding to before and after different people in her life left her.
The first people to leave her happened at the same time.
Apparently, the universe thought it was not enough that her dad had just been killed in a car crash. No, her best friend just had to leave at the same time. Chloe knew that realistically she could not entirely fault either for leaving, as it was not William's choice to die in a car crash. Nor was it Max's choice that her parents decided to move to Seattle, leaving Chloe without her best friend.
However, it was unequivocally Max's choice to abandon Chloe once she had left for greener pastures. Which in itself would have been bad enough, if it was not for the fact that it happened at Chloe's lowest point.
Before that time was a time of relative bliss. A time filled with pretending to be pirates, a beautiful friendship with the most wonderful girl in the world. And a relationship with her loving father who much like Max loved her for who she was.
Afterwards, there were only attempts of rebellion against Joyce, who Chloe knew loved her and had her best interests at heart. But in a world where everyone abandons you, it is very hard for you to believe that someone cares for you. Especially when that someone seems bound and determined to bring someone like David into your life.
And while drugs, rebellion, and punk numbed the pain, Chloe could never help but feel like she was empty and useless. A fact that felt increasingly evident by Blackwell making it clear to her constantly that she was not good enough for them.
And hell, Blackwell is this prestigious academy and she's just this broken, unlovable teenage girl, who nobody could ever want to have around. So maybe they were right.
~~~
This all changed when she met Rachel Amber.
Rachel was like a hurricane, who blew into Chloe's life from seemingly nowhere, and immediately turned her life on its side.
This rich, popular, smart girl thought that Chloe was special. And that Chloe was lovable enough that Rachel was willing, nay, Rachel was wanting to tear up her cushy and certain life to join with Chloe in a life of uncertainty in Los Angeles. To Chloe, it made perfect sense that Rachel and her would go to Los Angeles, as Los Angeles is the City of Angels. And Rachel Amber was most certainly some sort of Angel.
Truly, Rachel Amber made Chloe feel like there was something worth living for and that this idea of a tomorrow together with Rachel in LA where Rachel would be free of the expectations put upon her to be perfect. And Chloe would be free of the life that she lived in Arcadia Bay where she constantly was reminded of the past both the past where Chloe was loved by those who no longer loved her, or were no longer around to love her. And of the past during which she felt that no one loved her or even could love her.
And although she still felt that there was some part of her that was fundamentally unlovable, she knew that when Rachel looked at her, Rachel looked at her with love in a way that Chloe did not think anyone could or would ever look at her ever again.
Of course, that was when Rachel was there.
And of course, Rachel, like Max, and her father before her was gone.
When Rachel first went missing Chloe kept expecting to get a call, or even a letter from Rachel saying where she had gone, and calling Chloe to join her. And so while Chloe tore apart Arcadia Bay to find Rachel, she kept hoping that Rachel would find her so to speak.
That never happened.
While Chloe kept looking for Rachel relentlessly, she rapidly realized that Rachel had well and truly left her.
Which figures, truly it does. It always felt like such an elaborate prank that everyone but her was in on that Rachel fucking Amber the Queen of Blackwell chose to look upon her Chloe Price the delinquent girl who lost it all.
Maybe Rachel finally decided it was time to play off the prank and abandon her as well.
Maybe Rachel finally realized what a fucking loser she was and decided that she needed to fall off the map to get away from the mess that was Chloe.
It would figure, truly that was all everyone in Chloe's life ever did.
~~~
When Chloe saw Max in the Blackwell Parking Lot that day at first she couldn't believe it.
Sure, Max confirmed that it was her when she responded to Chloe after Chloe almost hit her with her truck, but still, she couldn't believe it.
First, she couldn't believe that somehow she had come to see Max again, as truly after Max left Arcadia Bay and abandoned her, she never expected she would ever see Max again. And really why would she? While she was pissed that Max and Rachel had abandoned her, she couldn't say she was surprised. As who would want to be around some broken, annoying, punk girl, in some Oregon Hick Town. Especially when Max had left Arcadia Bay for Seattle which to Chloe seemed like was the town that perhaps best embodied who Max Caulfield was. It was hipster, it was cool. It was everything that Chloe and Arcadia Bay weren't, and that Max was.
Secondly, while Max had abandoned her, and she had never really expected to see Max again she supposed that she had hoped that if Max ever decided to deign Arcadia Bay with her presence, that Max would see her as well. Because they were best friends! They were best friends, right? Chloe didn't know anymore maybe Chloe had only thought they were and Max hadn't returned such an absurd train of thought. And if she was here at Blackwell, that meant that Max had to have been here for at least a month. But yet in that time, Max had never come to see Chloe. Or even gone to the Two Whales, which while Chloe and her mom may not have had the best relationship ever, Chloe feels pretty certain in saying that if Max had come to the Two Whales that Joyce would've told her.
That thought made Chloe angry honestly. Not only was Max not brave enough to face Chloe herself and face up to the fact that she had abandoned her, but she also couldn't even face Joyce.
But yet, when Chloe saw Nathan trying to intimidate/attack Max and the boy that Max was with, she couldn't help but give Max a hand even though she didn't deserve it.
But hey, she was still Max Caulfield.
~~~
When Chloe picked up Max from the Blackwell parking lot she honestly had never expected for Max to be her saviour. Literally and Figuratively. While Chloe had doubted initially that Max had actually been her best friend, she had proven that this doubt of Chloe's was not one worth having. And she did so time and time again. From standing up for her and taking the blame when Step-Douche decided to get into her business. To staring down fucking Frank Bowers and not batting an eye and showing that she was willing to stand up for Chloe.
And that was not even mentioning the countless times that Max saved Chloe using her control over time, whether that be with Nathan in the Blackwell Bathrooms, or when Chloe got stuck on the train tracks.
But truly what showed Chloe that Max cared was that Max was willing to help Chloe try to find Rachel. A girl that Max had never met, and a girl that had in a sense taken Max's spot. And yet, Max helped Chloe do all sorts of illegal and dangerous acts that ranged from breaking into Blackwell, breaking into Frank's RV, to breaking into the Prescott's Barn and the Bunker Beneath. (They really did a lot of breaking into different places, she realized.)
Through these acts and the care, and empathy that Max showed Chloe when Chloe's whole world was turned upside down when she found Rachel dead in the junkyard, she showed truly how much she was sorry for abandoning Chloe. And the fact that she was a great person who was well worth letting in again.
When Chloe found Rachel in the junkyard she truly felt horrible for thinking that Rachel would just abandon her. While Chloe knew from her discoveries of Rachel's relationship with Frank that Rachel was not the perfect angel that Chloe and the world had put her on a pedestal to be, she still felt horrible for thinking that Rachel would ever willingly abandon her.
~~~
When the storm came, Chloe truly came to know just how much Max cared for her. Max was willing to give up a whole town for her. And to know that someone, especially the smart, talented, pretty, Max Caulfield loved her for who she was enough that she was willing to turn her world upside down just for her was truly a moment in which Chloe just felt whole in a word.
And while part of Chloe felt so bad for feeling so joyous when Arcadia Bay was being destroyed, and many people were dying or having their lives destroyed. Especially when Chloe and Max were lucky that all of their loved ones, including Joyce, Max's friends, and even David, managed to survive the storm. She still couldn't shake that joy.
Chloe's life could undoubtedly be divided up into portions defined by before and after people abandoned her. And she would feel forever saddened that her dad and Rachel had been forced to leave Chloe so soon and would forever miss the presence and love of both of them. She at the same time couldn't help but feel like as she looked at Max, that maybe within those losses and abandonments her life was defined and some things made her happy as well as things that made her sad.
Because when her dad died, and Max abandoned her, that was when the universe brought Rachel to her.
When Rachel was taken from her, that was when the universe brought Max back to her.
Not to say that there are silver linings in everything, or even most things, but Chloe realized that maybe things will not always turn out negatively with people abandoning her. Although she will undoubtedly sometimes worry for the rest of her life, that such a thing will occur. There are some instances in which people will not only not abandon you, but those who you thought to have will return. And show them that not only will they not abandon you again. But that they, the wonderful Max Caulfield, could love you Chloe Price.