When I See Your Light Shine (I Know I'm Home)

by Supercorp_Rositara

Summary:

After Transcendence, the survivors are given two gifts:
One: they are sent back in time to start over from the moment the dropship lands
Two: their memories are mostly intact
They scramble to find out why they were given a second chance and how to survive what's the come. But as for Clarke Griffin, the only thing she can think of is reuniting with her back (hopefully) alive green eyed lover.

Chapter 1: Back to the Start

“Prisoner 319, face the wall.”

 

“Earth, Clarke. You get to go to Earth.”

 

“We are not alone.”

 

“What do you want me to say, Clarke?” “I want you to say that you’re with us.”

 

“Welcome to Mount Weather.”

 

“These people aren’t telling us everything. It’s not safe.”

 

“I found you.”

 

“You’re the one who burned 300 of my warriors alive.” “You’re the one who sent them there to kill us.”

 

“Maybe life should be about more than just surviving. Don’t we deserve better than that?” “Maybe we do.”

 

“You were born for this, Klark. Same as me.”

 

“I bear it so they don’t have to.”

 

“If you want forgiveness, I’ll give it to you. you’re forgiven.”

 

“May we meet again.”

 

“Wanheda.”

 

“You bitch! I’ll kill you! you wanted the Commander of Death, well you’ve got her!”

 

“You can be the thirteenth station or the thirteenth clan. This is our unity day, mom.”

 

“I swear fealty to you, Klark kom Skaikru. I vow to treat your needs as my needs and your people as my people.”

 

“Ai laik Heda, non a throu don gon ai.”

 

“I won’t just stand there and watch you die!” “If it is to be my fate then you must.”

 

“Jus no drein jus daun.”

 

“Maybe one day, neither of us will anything more to our people.”

 

“That’s why…that’s why you’re you.”

 

“The next Commander will protect you.” “I don’t want the next Commander, I want you!”

 

“You were right, Klark. Life is about more than just surviving.”

 

“In peace may you leave this shore, in love may you find the next. Safe passage on your travels until our final journey on the ground. May we meet again.”

 

“Is she really in there?” “She is.”

 

“Stop! It’s Lexa!”

 

“Lexa was special.”

 

“Because of you, Ontari never ascended.”

 

“Her friends are her weakness. Start with Bellamy Blake.”

 

“Lexa?!”

 

“Lexa! I love you.” “I’ll always be with you.”

 

“Clarke, you don’t look like someone who just saved the world.” “Because we didn’t.”

 

“Lexa would be proud of you.”

 

“This was Jasper’s. He’d want you to have it.”

 

“We aren’t going back, we’re going up.”

 

“I say that death wave can kiss my ass.”

 

“Bellamy, if you can hear me…don’t wait.”

 

“I’ve lost everything!”

 

“I used to think that life was about more than just surviving. But now surviving is all there is.”

 

“Yu laik Natblida, sha?”

 

“Clarke? Tell me the story.”

 

“Wait! He tried to help me. I think he’s a good guy.” “There are no good guys.”

 

“Tell me about how our planet ended.” “Which time?”

 

“Clarke! If we leave, Diyoza will kill you!”

 

“I was protecting you.” “That’s my job!”

 

“She bore it so they didn’t have to. Just you like you did.”

 

“I thought love was weakness. Isn’t that what the Commanders in your head tell you?” “Yes. All but one.”

 

“We will meet again.” “How do you know?” “Because I am the Commander of death and I say that we will.”

 

“I hope Jasper was wrong and we’re not the problem. Be the good guys. May we meet again.”

 

“My mother died today. I can’t lose you, too.”

 

“I’m sorry.” “I’m sorry, too.”

 

“My brother died a long time ago.”

 

“Madi? Say something, Madi. Say something!”

 

“I’m not her, Clarke.” “I know.”

 

“Feel me holding Lexa as she dies. Feel me see someone else wear my mother’s face. Feel me murder my best friend to save my child only to have her die anyway. Feel that!”

 

“It’s okay. I know you don’t want to leave me, but you have to go now. This gives you a chance to live. Let go, Madi. I’ll be okay. I love you forever, Madi.”

 

“Picasso! Please come back! I don’t want to be alone.”

 

“I bear it so they don’t have to…again.”

 

“Transcendence is a choice? You can choice to come back?” “Of course…though until now, no one ever had. There won’t be offspring and they won’t join us when they die. None of them seem to care.”

 

“A curious species, indeed…”

 

The rattle of turbulence shook Clarke awake. Wait, turbulence? Emerald green eyes faded from behind her eyelids as she opens them in confusion. She blinks against the dim light, expecting the bright beach but instead is greeted with the inside of the dropship. She sees people strapped to chairs as the dropship they’re in plummets down. Not just any people—the hundred. She looks around as the lights flicker and the tin coffin shakes. She sees Wells beside her and instead of profusely apologizing, she just meets her best friends warm eyes.

 

“We’re back.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement.

 

“It appears so,” she chokes out before she searches the place. She sees Finn strapped into his seat this time. He remembered what happened last time. She sees Octavia beside Miller. Harper, Monroe, Monty, Jasper. “We’ll be okay.”

 

There’s a thud. And the sound of machinery is gone. She waits for Jasper’s comment of no machine hum but there is none. They had all almost forgotten what it sounded like. She unstraps quickly, Wells following suit. Octavia beats her to the door and they share a brief smile.

 

“Bellamy!” Octavia’s calling before she’s even down the ladder. “Bellamy!”

 

“O?” Bellamy catches his sister in a hug, holding her tightly. “O, I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. So sorry.”

 

“You were right, Bellamy. Not about Cadogan but about Transcendence.”

 

“Did you…?”

 

“Yes. But we chose to go back. We chose to stay and live…and then we woke up here.”

 

“We?”

 

“Bellamy?” Clarke approached cautiously, searching his face. She sees no resentment when he reaches for her, pulling her close. She hugs him, she hugs her best friend. “I’m sorry I killed you,” she chokes out, voice breaking.

 

“I’m sorry I made you,” he makes out. “Madi?”

 

Clarke shakes her head. “He still hurt her. She transcended though, Bellamy. She survived in a way.”

 

Their bubble is popped when others crowd them. They welcomed it. Welcomed Murphy, Jasper, Monty, Harper, Miller, Monroe. “Can we go out?” Jasper still had a light, dim but there, shining in his brown eyes. Excitement sparked because for many of them, they were back home.

 

“What do you say, O? Want the honor again?”

 

Octavia smirks and nods. Bellamy lifts the lever and a hissing sound reaches their ears. The ramp lowers and Octavia steps out. She walks down the ramp, breathing in the delightful smell of Earth. Sees the sun peeking through the moss covered trees, hears birds chirping and flying about. Her feet hit the soft mossy Earth and she throws her arms in the air before yelling loud and clear, “we’re back, bitches!”

 

A chorus of cheers and laughter ring out as everyone runs out behind her. Jasper lets out a whoop! Miller and Bellamy are elated as Monty and Harper laugh, arms looped.

 

“What, Princess? No ‘they dropped us on the wrong damn mountain’?” Clarke looks over as Finn steps up beside her.

 

She looks at the peak of Mount Weather in the distance before looking around the familiar land. Their land. “No. They dropped us right where we belong.”

 

Wells appears on her other side. “What about the Grounders?”

 

Grounders. Lexa. She’s hit with the image of soft brown curls and emerald green eyes, sun-kissed skin donned with a intricate tattoo down her spine. A gentle, kind smile reserved only for her. “Lexa…”

 

Finn’s head snaps towards her. “Lexa? Isn’t that—”

 

“The Commander,” Clarke nods.

 

“Did she threaten you? Hurt you? Is that why we’re back in time, to take care of her?”

 

“Wh—no! No. Don’t…” She draws a breath through her nose. “She would never hurt me.”

 

“She was going to have me tortured, Clarke. Death by a hundred cuts or something like that. She’s a savage.”

 

“She’s not!” she all but shouts, causing Wells to put a hand on her tense shoulder. “She didn’t want to. She let me do what I did, she made her people accept it. She was…she had so much burden on her shoulders. But Lexa was good. Lexa is good. Lexa is special.”

 

“Special? Clarke? You don’t…do you like her? After what she’s done? After what her people did?”

 

“I don’t like her. I love her.” There. She said it aloud and proud.

 

“How can you after—”

 

“You forced her hand when you murdered eighteen unarmed elders and children!”

 

That got the others attention. When she looks behind her she sees Bellamy, Octavia, Murphy, Monty and Jasper standing not too far away. Clarke shakes her head, ignoring the pained look on Finn’s face. She feels bad for a moment but his distaste for the woman she loves kept her from sparing him another look. She walked over to the others and hears Wells following. “I need to go to her.”

 

“Clarke,” Bellamy gives her an unreadable look. “We need a plan.”

 

“The plan is I go to Trikru and get Indra to bring me to Polis.”

 

“We need a plan for the others,” he tells her. “Echo.”

 

“She’s in Mount Weather,” the realization hits her. “And Maya,” she gives Jasper an apologetic look.

 

“And Emori is in the dead zone,” Murphy sighs.

 

“Octavia wants to find Lincoln. Go with her, find him, then find Indra.”

 

“You want us to go?”

 

“Want? No. But I need you to. We need you when you get to Polis to talk to Lexa about striking a deal with Dante, to free the grounder prisoners and set the Mountain Men free. We’re going to all need the mountain in just over a year when Praimfaya comes. It’s going to be a hard talk, especially with their history with the Mountain Men. But we need this for the human race to survive what’s to come. And then I need to round up volunteers for bone marrow donation…”

 

“Polis? Mountain Men? Praimfaya? Bone marrow?” Finn and Wells both give Bellamy a questioning look mixed with horror.

 

“I guess while you find the Commander, we have a lot of explaining to do here.”

 

“Good luck, Big Brother,” Octavia tells him, corner of her lips tilt up in a smirk.

 

He pulls her into a crushing her, holding onto her a little longer than he normally would. “You too, O. You too.”

 

****

 

“Skaikru.”

 

“The leader of Skaikru has requested to meet with you.” “Bring him in.” “Not a him.” “Not Marcus Kane?” “No. A girl. Clarke.”

 

“You’re the one who burned three hundred of my warriors alive. “You’re the one who sent them there to kill us.”

 

“You may have your peace. But I want something in return. Bring me the one you call Finn.”

 

“Show my people that you aren’t savages.” “We are what we are.”

 

“I recognized it for what it is: weakness.” “What is? Love?” “Yes.”

 

“Jop en op en yu jop ai op.”

 

“You couldn’t leave me to die. That was weakness.” “I thought love was weakness?” “Mockery is not the product of a strong mind, Clarke.”

 

“You may be heartless, Lexa, but at least you’re smart.”

 

“Don’t be afraid, Klark. Death is not the end.” “We are not dying here!”

 

“It’s okay. You’re safe.”

 

“Clarke of the sky people has honored us with her presence.”

 

“Did that make you feel better?” “No.”

 

“You were born for this, Clarke. Same as me.”

 

“You can’t just kill everyone you don’t trust!” “Yes I can.”

 

“Maybe life should be about more than just surviving. Don’t we deserve better than that?” “Maybe we do.”

 

“Jus drein jus daun!”

 

“You should come with me to the capitol. Polis will change the way you think about us.” “You already have.”

 

“Where are my people?” “I’m sorry, Clarke. They weren’t part of the deal.”

 

“I’ll kill you! You wanted the Commander of Death, you’ve got her!”

 

“I swear fealty to you, Klark kom Skaikru. I vow to treat your needs as my needs and your people as my people.”

 

“I won’t just stand here and watch you die!” “If that is to be my fate, you must.”

 

“Is this ‘I told you so?’” “No. This is ‘thank you.’”

 

“Do you ever talk about anything other than your death?”

 

“Our people act as if war is easier than peace. If that’s so, should we not try to and achieve the more difficult goal? Blood must not have blood.”

 

“Hey, it’s okay. You’re okay.”

 

“Jus no drein jus daun!”

 

“That’s why I…that’s why you’re you.” “Maybe someday, you and I will owe nothing more to our people.” “I hope so.”

 

“We don’t have to talk at all…”

 

“You were right, Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving.”

 

“In peace, may you leave this shore. In love, may you find the next. Safe passage on our travels until our final journey on the ground. May we meet again.”

 

“Lexa! I love you.” “I’ll always be with you.”

 

Emerald green eyes flashed open. She sits up with labored breathing. She presses her palm to her middle but there’s nothing. No blood, no wound. She feels the thumping of a beating heart—she didn’t have that in the flame, not when she last saw…

 

“Klark,” she breathes, looking around.

 

How was she here, alive? And where was Clarke? She didn’t remember much from the flame and had no idea how her lover was in it or how much time had passed between her death and that moment. She remembers Clarke was hurt and she saved her, remember searching for something, and having to say goodbye to save her. But that was all.

 

She had said she loved her. “Lexa! I love you.” Was that part real? Did she really say that? She climbed out of bed, dressing in her day-to-day clothes before walking to the doors and pulling them open, ready to find out what was happening and most of all, finding the love of her life.

Chapter 2: Lincoln

Notes:

What is spoken in Trigedasleng is in bold italics. Some will actually be in trig but most is just bold in English because I don't want to spend forever trying to figure out the translations lol

Octavia moved through the trees, quietly and stealthily. She could feel her muscles aching already—her mind was as sharp as before but her body was back to a girl who lived under the floor and then a cell. Her years of muscle was gone but she welcomed the ache, welcomed the idea of Indra helping her achieve her skill once more.

 

Clarke followed, stepping nearly as quietly. Like her first time trekking through the woods, she was anxious about her surroundings. But instead of anxious of the impending hunger, she was concerned about the threats out here. They had no weapons and she had no idea if there were anyone who wanted to hurt them. Like warriors they burned alive in a ring of fire.

 

“Octavia, slow down!”

 

“We’re almost to Lincoln’s cave!”

 

“Octavia! How many warriors are out here that we killed that have no idea we ever made an alliance? Warriors that would kill any Skaikru they came across. We have to be careful out here.”

 

The younger girls’ step falters. In her excitement to find her love she had forgotten that there could very well be threats out here. “You think they have their memories?”

 

“They could.”

 

There’s some doubt on her face this time, her frown deepening. “Do you think they will remember?” Clarke knew who they were—Lincoln, Indra, Lexa.

 

“I hope so,” her voice is longing as she thinks of soft brown curls and emerald green eyes. She wishes she has a better answer. She sees the fear of Lincoln not remembering her written across Octavia’s face. She wants to comfort her, but she knows they’re better off worrying and being relieved when they see recognition in their eyes than to be filled with unwavering hope only to be crushed when their lovers don’t even know their names. “There’s only one way to find out. Come on, let’s go find him.”

 

****

 

“You made a deal with them?” Finn asks. “And then they betrayed you? And Clarke still likes her?”

 

“Clarke is forgiving, usually.”

 

“She hated you for a year,” Finn reminds him.

 

“She didn’t hate me because she thought I betrayed her.”

 

“She thought you were the reason her father was executed,” Bellamy says, “that’s worse than a betrayal. Anyways, I never understood what she saw—sees—in Lexa, maybe I never will. But I learned a long time ago to never question her.”

 

“How did you defeat the mountain without her help?” Wells asks.

 

“I found a way to irradiate the level,” Monty is who speaks up, giving Jasper another apologetic look. Jasper gives him a tense smile, the hurt still so raw. But he was understanding. They were given a second chance to do it all over, Maya was alive again. He hoped she was, hoped she wasn’t in danger if Cage or Emerson had their memories and wanted revenge. “I did it.”

 

“You did it but Clarke and I pulled the level. We killed over three hundred people. Men, women, children. They had our people, they were drilling them for their bone marrow. Raven, Abby. Octavia was captured. We couldn’t let them die. We did what we had to do. ‘I bear it so they don’t have to,’ that’s what Clarke said before we pulled it.”

 

“That’s such a burden for you both to carry,” Wells sighs, “she understands her, right? Lexa?”

 

“I guess,” he sighs, rubbing his forehead. “So we headed home and Clarke couldn’t go into camp. She walked away and was missing for three months.”

 

“Where was she?” Finn brings himself to ask, very much aware what happened to him last time Clarke was missing after a battle.

 

“Everywhere? I don’t know. Next time I saw her was three months later and she was held captive by the prince of Azgeda.”

 

“That’s the bad clan, right?” Wells asked, wracking his brain to try to remember everything he’s learned so far. There were a lot of clans.

 

“Yes. The prince, Roan, he wasn’t that bad. He wasn’t there to hurt her. Clarke had a bounty of her head—”

 

“Why?” Finn interrupts.

 

“If you let me finish you’d know,” Bellamy gives him his shut up, I’m in charge look. He had only covered from the ring of fire to Mount Weather and he was already exhausted. He had so much more ahead and he wasn’t sure he was prepared for that. He was thankful for Murphy, Jasper, Monty and Harper jumping in whenever they could. “When she killed the mountain men, people started calling her Wanheda. Commander of Death. Legend has it if they killed her they’d be able to command death itself.”

 

“So she was being hunted for three months?” Wells asks for clarification. “By the grounders?”

 

“By Azgeda.”

 

“Where’d the prince bring her?”

 

“Polis,” Murphy answers this time. “It was named after the thirteenth station Polaris, when the pod cane down the a and r were burned off when it entered the atmosphere. Polis is the grounder capitol.”

 

“The thirteenth station was blown out of the sky by the Ark,” Finn counters. He remembers when he said the exact same thing that first unity day on the ground.

 

“Not before Becca escaped. She was a scientist and the reason for the bombs,” Monty adds. “There wasn’t a war. It was ALIE.”

 

“Alie?” Finn’s frown deepens.

 

“Artificial intelligence,” Jasper, the only one present who had been in the City of Light, responded. “Applied Lucent Intelligence Emulator.”

 

“Wait, that’s what that stands for?” Murphy asks.

 

“Yup. Wish I didn’t know that” he looks down, his memory stilled plagued by the guilt of taking the chip and hurting his friends, mainly Monty.

 

“Back to the bombs,” Finn says impatiently.

 

“Becca created ALIE to help improve human life. she went rogue,” Jasper continues. “Her core command was to make life better for mankind. She took her commands too literally, locked the scientists out, hacked nuclear passcodes and well, we all know the rest.”

 

“Why?” Finn and Wells ask at the same time.

 

“Too many people,” Murphy quotes. “Your father searched for her. He heard about this magical place called the City of Light across the dead zone. Took a dozen of us with him. Half turned back when we ran out of food and water, half of what was left died in a minefield, the other two were eaten by a sea monster. When we found it, it wasn’t what it seemed. She had people swallow a key that tapped into human consciousness. Swallowing it allowed ALIE to control them or something.”

 

Jasper nods, swallowing hard. “Murphy’s right. When I swallowed it, she controlled what I did. It’s like she manipulated our thoughts. I was still me but I wanted to do what she wanted. When she was killed I remembered everything that happened in it.”

 

“How was she killed?” Wells asks.

 

“Clarke, with a little help from Raven,” Bellamy answers. Finn’s head snaps up at the mention of his former girlfriend. “Clarke had a blood transfusion of Nightblood and took the flame. Damn near killed her but she did it to save us.”

 

“Sounds like her,” Wells smiles lightly.

 

“What’s the flame?” Finn asks.

 

Bellamy, Murphy, Jasper, Monty and Harper shared a look. Their talk just became a lot more complicated.

 

****

 

“We’re almost there,” Octavia says as her surroundings became familiar. It had been so long since she last saw the cave but it was forever etched into her memory. “Just another minute—”

 

“Who’s there?” a gravelly voice asks, accent thick as he spoke in Trigedasleng. Oh how Octavia missed the native tongue here. But more importantly, she missed his voice.

 

“Lincoln…” his name left her lips just above a whisper as she slowly pivots to the direction the voice came from.

 

He emerged from the shadows and her heart skips a beat. Her green eyes search his face, searching for any recognition on his face. His hardened expression softens, jaw slackening as he has a hint of a smile. “Octavia.”

 

“Lincoln.” The warrior in her is pushed aside as she takes the few steps between them in a sprint. He catches her, lifting her up into a crushing hug. She folds her arms around his broad shoulder, burying her face in the crook of his neck as she breathes his in.

 

“I’m sorry I left you,” he says into her hair.

 

“I’m sorry for what I became after you died,” she mutters.

 

He lowers her, cupping her chin to meet his gaze. He picked up on her saying what rather than who. He saw the deep shame and the layers of hurt in her eyes but he doesn’t push. He knows her well enough—she would tell him when she was ready. And she would, but not here in the woods where enemies could be watching. She would tell him when they had nothing but time and privacy where they could lay in furs and recount their lives.

 

“We need to see Indra,” she says, her face telling him how much she didn’t enjoy ruining their reunion. She looks back at Clarke, “we need to talk to the Commander.”

 

“Alright, just…hold on.” He cups her face gently, brushing his fingers along her smooth, unscarred face. He leans down and kisses her deeply, savoring the moment like it was their last. For all he knew, it could be. He never imaged their time would be cut so short last time.

 

“Ai hod yu in,” she whispers.

 

“Ai hod yu in,” he repeats, his love for her heavy in his voice. He smiles, a sight that made her heart swell. His words soothe her even more. “Come on, let’s go see Indra.”

Chapter 3: Earth Monitoring

“I’ll save you the trouble. I feel fine.”

 

“They’re not dying. They’re taking them off.”

 

“What a piece of junk. They must have found this thing when they salvaged MIR-3 in 2102. You want me to get it ready to withstand the inferno of re-entry in nine days?”

 

“I dreamed it would smell like this! Is this rain?”

 

“This is Raven Reyes. I’m from Mecha Station. The hundred are alive.”

 

“Don’t shoot!” “Why not? You shot me.”

 

“She stopped being a kid the moment you sent her down here to die.”

 

“We all have battle scars, Finn. Suck it up and build a brace for yours.”

 

“The only murderer here is you!”

 

“Kyle. Don’t leave me, please.”

 

“Because you stole my memories, you crazy bitch!”

 

“I’m going to get you out of here!” “Stay in the rover…”

 

“Hey Luna? It’s not your blood that defines you…it’s your heart.”

 

“Welcome to Mount Weather.”

 

“What do I say? I say that death wave can kiss my ass.”

 

“Time violation. Murphy or latrines.”

 

“There is no escape pod…you’re right, it’d suck to die alone.”

 

“Does the name ‘Shaw’ mean anything to you?”

 

“I was focusing on what I lost and not what I had, I’m sorry, for all of it. The drugs, disappointing you…truly.” “I’m sorry for how things have been between us. It wasn’t always fair how I judged you.” “I deserved to be judged for what I did to you. And I will never hurt you that way again. I may not be your mother but you are my family, Raven.”

 

“This was me…I did this.”

 

“Take this one to M-Cap.” “Bellamy, no! So much for family.”

 

“He didn’t send them to Sanctum.” “Correct! And thank you for demonstrating why I didn’t send you with them.”

 

“So…Sheidheda’s alive and Madi’s in a nuclear reactor? You did good.” “All of our friends are missing and Bellamy’s a sheep? So did you.”

 

“I sent them in and when things got really bad and I…I locked him in here because I was afraid he was as much if a coward as I am. He wasn’t, he was brave. I chose to let them all die and save myself instead. It should have been me.” “You live with what you’ve done.”

 

“What is taking you so long?” “Miracles take time. Hero Murphy is kind of freaking me out.”

 

“I failed. It should have been you, not me. They should have picked you first.”

 

“Don’t you see? Despite the beauty humans are capable of, you can’t break free from the cycle of violence. This is who you are, that is why you failed the test. It’s time for us to go, Raven. The end of the human race is here.”

 

“I told you. We can change. We just need more time.”

 

Raven’s eyes snap open, the memories bouncing around through her beautiful brain. She looks around her room and sees the metallic walls, feels the rough fabric of her cot beneath her.

 

“No. This is the Ark.” It was her room she’d had for as long as she could remember, the humming she had spent her life listening to until it forever changed when she landed on Earth. “How? Why…Abby.”

 

She gets out of bed and realizes she got up smoothly, painlessly. She reaches down and doesn’t feel the brace that had become a part of her. She moves her knee seamlessly, rolling her ankle, wiggling her toes. “Time travel?” She muses, not remembering going through any portals on Earth. As far as she knew, they only led to other planets, not through time itself. She vowed to figure it out later—if they were truly back in time, it’d mean Abby was alive, Sinclair was alive.

 

She leaves her room and enters the dim hallway. She had become too accustomed to the sun despite the fact that she spent more time on the Ark and ring than she did on Earth or Sanctum. She heads to Earth Monitoring; if everyone else had their memories than she just might step foot in there for the first time. If everyone had memories, she knew that’s where Sinclair, Abby and Kane would be.

 

“Raven!”

 

Raven spins on her heel when she hears the familiar voice. She can’t help the smile that breaks out on her face. “Jackson!”

 

He pulls her into a hug when he reaches her. “You remember,” he says.

 

“You do, too. Do others?”

 

“You mean Abby? Yes. She and Kane both do.”

 

“Sinclair?”

 

“That I’m not certain of, but I’d bet yes. It seems like pretty much everyone has their memories. Abby actually sent me to find you, though seems you’re already on your way to exactly where she needs you.”

 

“What can I say? Predictable,” she smirks.

 

“Still as cocky as ever, I see.”

 

She laughs, a genuine laugh that reaches her eyes. Jackson joins her, a smile she usually only saw when he was with Miller. They headed to Earth Monitoring together, smiles subsiding and seriousness taking over. The guards stationed there let them both in without question.

 

“Sinclair!” The name came out the second she saw him. Her mentor smiles and moves to embrace her tightly. Stay in the rover. “I missed you,” she chokes out.

 

“You did good, Raven. I’m so proud.” Sinclair was a great teacher and although he was kind, his praises were always reserved. His undoubting praise made tears prick in her eyes. “I’m not the only one who was waiting for you. You took your sweet time getting here.” She lets out a watery laugh as he lets her go.

 

She doesn’t even try to keep the tears at bay, not when she sees Abby. She forgets how together she typically kept herself as she throws herself into Abby’s waiting arms. She sees Abby in her mind, sees her make amends only for Russel to shove a needle in her neck to erase everything that made her Abby. Her emotions, her memories. Sees him turn her into Simone, see Abby’s face on the enemy. Feels her heart sputter when she hears Abby’s body was gone, leaving nothing to bury. Leaving them no grave to cry over, just like how they lost Kane. I may not be your mother, but you are my family, Raven.

 

“You were gone,” her voice comes out in a strangled sob, “we tried—tried to help you but we…we couldn’t.”

 

“Jackson said the same thing,” Abby soothes. “Let me look at you.” She lets her go and wipes away the tears from her cheeks. She smooths back some strands that escaped her ponytail, stroking her cheek. “Your leg?”

 

“Good as new. We went backwards. Murphy never shot me. Mount Weather never drilled into it.”

 

“So everyone was reset. But our memories are intact. Why?” Kane asks, observing the screen ahead of him with Jaha by his side. Raven follows his gaze. The hundred. Their vitals. Clarke, Octavia, Murphy, Jasper, Monty, Harper, Finn. She can’t even bring herself to think of Finn, she couldn’t do that all over again.

 

“The higher beings must have sent us back,” she muses.

 

“I’m sorry, the what?” Sinclair asks. He was a man of science, he loved things he could put together and understand. The thought of higher beings, gods, whatever threw his mind off.

 

“They were like gods. An alien species across the universe, across many universes. They judged species in a test and decided whether to allow them to transcend into one likeminded consciousness of immortality in a sense or to wipe the species out of existence. Transcendence was a choice though, some of us chose to come back. One minute I was going to sleep on the beach, next I was waking up in my bed up here.”

 

“Higher beings?” Jaha asks and she sees him almost envisioning ALIE.

 

“Aliens. Real beings. Not like the City of Light, it was real. They sent us back, that’s the only explanation that makes sense.”

 

“I’m going to need to hear more of this,” Sinclair says, sitting.

 

“Later. We have more important things to discuss,” Abby tells him. She looks back to Raven. “The hundred are on the ground. Once again, we have no way to contact them. We know that Mecha, Alpha and Farm survived landing. We know Factory made it through but was destroyed in landing. The other ships blew up entering the atmosphere. We need time to plan exactly when to launch so we can land where we can live and to prepare the grounders for our reentry especially if they don’t have memories. We need you to rebuild that pod, I need you to get to the ground to let the others know and so you all have a radio.”

 

“We’ll give you everything you need to build it. And assistance if you’d like it,” Kane tells her, eyes not leaving the screens.

 

“And supplies,” Jaha says. “When my memory came back the dropship had already launched so there was no time to load them up with supplies. We’ll send you down with blankets, food and medicine.”

 

“When do I start?” Raven asks, straightening. She had a purpose now.

 

“Now,” Sinclair hands her a toolbox. “We start now.”

 

****

 

“We’re almost there,” Lincoln says in his native tongue. They had decided sticking to Trig was in their best interest and would draw less attention to them. Lincoln had admitted he hadn’t gone to the village yet so he had no idea if anyone else had memories.

 

“What if they don’t remember?” Clarke asks.

 

“We do our best to convince them,” Octavia answers. “If Indra doesn’t remember…”

 

Lincoln gives her hand a comforting squeeze, fingers rubbing the back of her hand. She draws comfort from him. Clarke observes them from the corner of her eyes, longing for what they had. She never got that with Lexa. When she was finally ready, they had one beautiful, blissful moment. And then she watched her die. Octavia meets her gaze and the younger girls’ expression softens. She understood what that look meant.

 

“Osir laik hir,” Lincoln says, letting Octavia’s hand go. He took the lead walking into TonDC. The two girls followed, side by side. Octavia observed the village around her, wonder in her eyes.

 

“Lincoln.”

 

“Anya.”

 

Clarke observed the woman in front of her. The woman she was at war with, created a fragile peace with and then her people shot her. But she was also the woman who Lexa served as Seken to before she ascended. “Why did you bring Skaikru?” The disapproving in her voice, the glare she fixed Clarke with, it all told them that her memories were intact.

 

“We’re here to see Indra kom Trikru,” Octavia spoke up.

 

“And you taught her our tongue.”

 

“I’ve spoken your tongue for many years. Ai laik Oktevia kom Skaikru, ai laik seken to Amin Indra.”

 

“Indra would never take on a Skaikru seken.”

 

“She did,” Clarke answers. “It is important for us to see her.”

 

“You taught her, too?”

 

“No. Leksa did.”

 

“You made it to Heda?” Clarke nods.

 

Before Anya cam question her further, “Oktevia kom Skaikru!” sounded out and Octavia’s face broke out into a smile. Octavia steps towards her former mentor and Anya steps aside, letting the girl past. Once Octavia passes her, she fixes Clarke with another stony look.

 

“Indra,” Octavia breathes. She holds out her hand to clasp her mentor’s arm but Indra forgoes it and pull her former Seken and then leader into a hug. It was short but it meant the world to the girl.

 

Clarke stalks past Anya, heading over to Octavia and Indra. Indra gives her a rare smile when she sees her. It had taken her a long time, but she had eventually grown fond of the blonde sky girl. “Clarke,” she reaches out, clasping her arm.

 

“I need to see Lexa.”

 

Indra surveys her for a moment. “I am heading for Polis tomorrow at first light, you are welcome to join me.”

 

“Thank you, Indra.”

 

“Fid!” She calls to one of the warriors nearby, “show Klark and Oktevia kom Skaikru where they can rest. We have a long journey in the morning.”

 

Clarke had ended up in a small tent by herself, Lincoln and Octavia claiming the other one. Clarke was asleep almost as soon as she laid down, the thought that by the next night, she would be reunited with Lexa. She clung to the hope, the very hope she had been afraid of since she awoke, that Lexa would remember. That they would have their second chance and this time she wouldn’t waste a second of it.

Chapter 4: Strength

Notes:

Words in bold italics are spoken in Trig. Most is written in English because, well, I don't have time tp figure out entire conversations in Trig lol

I can't find any accurate things about Lexa's age. JRoth said age doesn't matter, I saw somewhere she was a teen, somewhere she was in her 20s. I went with she's around Clarke's age- 17/18.

 

“Heda, I beg of you.”

 

“We’ve been over this, Titus,” she fights to hold back the anger bubbling in her chest. She had been going back and forth with the Commander since the morning.

 

“At least wait until first light. If you leave now, you’ll be traveling through the dark. You’re enemies are back from the dead! Queen Nia, the Mountain, reapers. It isn’t safe! It is not worth you losing your life again because of Skai—”

 

Lexa swung around and Titus took a step back. He hadn’t seen her that angry, not even after he shot her. “Skaikru didn’t end my life, Titus,” she says between clenched teeth. “You did that. You shot me. You killed me when you tried to kill Klark. Did you hurt her, Titus? Is that why you’re so set—”

 

“No! I swore to you that I would never harm her. I wouldn’t dishonor you.”

 

“You shot me.”

 

“Heda, after you were gone and Ontari killed the Natblidas I gave Klark the flame and anointed her Flamekeeper. I got her out of Polis and sent her to find Luna. I gave my own life to buy her time to escape. Whether she escaped or not, I do not know. But I did everything in my power to get her out.”

 

“Then why are you so against my leaving?”

 

“Because your enemies know your weakness now more than ever! Nia knows! Wanheda will be your downfall!”

 

“She’s not Wanheda now. The Mountain stands again. She’s Klark kom Skaikru.”

 

“If Nia gets her hands on her she’ll do exactly what she did to Costia to her. Do you want that fate bestowed upon that girl? Do you want to be questioned by Nia again? To have another coup?”

 

“Klark won’t be harmed, not under my protection. Nia won’t challenge me, not when it didn’t work last time. No she’ll try something new.”

 

“It didn’t work last time because you broke the rules of solo gomplei and killed he instead of your opponent.”

 

“I won. I had Roan on his back! You heard the crowd cheering after, Titus. They were happy to be free from Nia.”

 

“They cheered because they were relieved they had a Commander who protected them. If they worry the Sky Girl affects your leadership they will strike again.”

 

“She won’t affect my leadership! I am more than capable of separating feelings from duties!”

 

He backed off at that moment. He was brought back (or forward?) in time where she had yelled the same thing at him. He hadn’t listened to her then and because of that he had killed her mere hours later. “You shouldn’t travel alone, Heda.”

 

“I won’t be. Gustus will be with me.”

 

“You said the reason you didn’t return with him last time was because he betrayed you. He poisoned himself to break up your treaty with Skaikru. Now you bring him with you to protect your Skaikru lover on Skaikru land.”

 

“He poisoned himself, it’s true. He let Raven get tortured. But he never hurt Klark or her people and he never killed his Heda doing it.” He looks down in shame. That guilt was something he knew would never leave him. “He won’t question me. I’ll be sure of it. My horse should be ready. I have a few hours until dark. I will travel through the dark if I must.”

 

“Be safe, Heda.”

 

“Take care of my Natblidas.” He nearly flinches at that. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get her look of heartbreak and horror that appeared on her face when he told her what had happened to the Natblidas, what happened to Aden. The fact her beloved novitiates had their heads hacked off as they slept while he was too focused fighting with Clarke to watch over them would forever haunt the both of them.

 

She walks away from him, heading for the lift. A guard lets her into the lift, stepping in beside her. She feels the lift lower shakily to the ground. When it finishes its descend she and her guard step out and walk through the tunnel that leads out of the tower. She finds the horses waiting as predicted. She looks up to see the sun beginning to dip, leaving them a few hours before the sky blackened. She sees Gustus who refuses to meet her gaze. She knows he feels heavy regret from their first life.

 

“Gustus.”

 

He finally meets her gaze. “Heda.”

 

“You will be accompanying me to TonDC.”

 

“Why me?” he asks, keeping a respectful tone.

 

“You are still my Fosgona, aren’t you?”

“Sha, Heda.”

 

“We will settle at TonDC. And then we will find the children of Skaikru. The Ark hasn’t come down, just the kids sent first. We will aid them, keep them safe like we should have done before.”

 

“Heda…if they remember they’ll remember the war. They’ll think us as the enemy.”

 

“No. If they remember their leader will assure them that we mean them no harm.” There’s the smallest of smiles on her lips when she thinks of the girl she had fallen for, who had crashed through her walls and demolished her belief that love was weakness. She thinks of golden hair and eyes as blue as the summer sky.

 

“Their leader was a grown man, not a child.”

 

“Their true leader was Klark kom Skaikru.”

 

“The blonde.” He sees the hint of a smile on her lips even after she mounts her grey horse. “Heda you didn’t. You swore to never have another lover, swore you wouldn’t be weak again. not after Cos—”

 

She shoots him a cold glare, daring him to finish his sentence. He shrinks down on his horse not wanting to temp her. She was hardened unlike before but also softer in a way. He could see taking about the sky girl was out of the question and respected it as much as he hated to. Trying to destroy the alliance last time had cost him his life and if she had some kind of relationship with the girl it meant he had died for nothing.

 

“Do not question me.”

 

“Bosh moba, Heda.”

 

“Yu nou trana bash op Klark or Skaikru nodotaim nowe. Swega em klin.”

 

“Ai swega em klin.”

 

“Again.”

 

****

 

Clarke was awake before the sun rose. She sat on a log across from the fire, hands shoved deep inside of her pockets. She knew Octavia would likely need to be woken up to go—sleeping in Lincoln’s arms was exactly where her friend needed to be to feel safe and warm.

 

“You’re going to be exhausted on the journey.” Clarke looks behind her and sees Indra approaching her.

 

“So will you.”

 

“I do fine without sleep,” the warrior says, lowering herself down on the log next to Clarke’s. “Octavia may be the only one who’s getting sleep.” Clarke follows her gaze to see Anya was awake as well, speaking with some other warriors.

 

“Octavia has Lincoln back,” Clarke says simply, “it’s all she wanted…that and getting to you. She was adamant about finding Lincoln and then coming here right after. I needed to get here so I could get to her.”

 

“What happened between you and the Commander?” Indra asks, gaze steady on the fire.

 

Clarke bites her lip, stunned by the question. “I…It’s up to her to share. I don’t know how much she wants anyone knowing, not after her feelings for me got her killed…”

 

“Her love for you didn’t kill her,” Indra says fiercely. “Heda was always stronger and more stubborn than anyone I knew. Even as a small child she was brave and strong and smart. She won her conclave when she was just twelve years old. She united the twelve clans, something no other Commander could ever do, when she was fourteen years old. She’s so young, some would argue too young for the burden she carries. I despised you t first, all of you. Octavia was the first to show me that you all weren’t so insufferable. And then I saw the change in our Commander. From you. the light in her was snuffed out when the Queen of Azgeda killed Costia. You brought that light back. The other clans may say she was weak to love you. But to those who know her best, you were her strength.”

 

“You think?” Clarke asks doubtfully, blinking against the tears.

 

“I know. And I am never wrong.”

 

****

 

Clarke was strapping her pack to the copper colored gelding she was given to ride for the journey. Nearby Octavia was doing the same with Helios. Clarke swore that her friend’s eyes teared up when she was reunited with her horse. Lincoln was getting his big black horse ready while Indra spoke with Anya, her bay horse already ready and tied to a post.

 

Anya wasn’t fond of the idea of Indra heading to Polis with the girls from Skaikru. Indra assured the warrior that they were no threat to the Commander, especially not Clarke. Anya didn’t trust them but she trusted Indra’s judgment. Or at least, she did. The Indra she knew would have never taken a child from the sky as her seken let alone hug her, feel fond of her. she wouldn’t smile at the young leader of the enemy.

 

Their stare off was interrupted by a horse galloping into the village. They instantly recognized the rider as a Polis guard.

 

“Indra kom Trikru, Ai Laik Kaito kom Trishanakru.”

 

“You ride fom Polis,” Indra asks. “Is there word from Heda?”

 

“Heda sent me ahead of her to inform you.” Clarke’s head swings to look at the rider. Ahead of her? “Heda will be here soon. No more than an hours’ time.”

 

“Heda is on her way here?” Anya asks, frowning. “Why?”

 

Anya follows the riders, and Indra’s, gaze right over to where Clarke stood in shock. “Of course,” Anya grumbled before stalking away.

 

****

 

Clarke paced around inside of the tent. It had been set up for Heda but Indra had allowed her to go in and wait for her. Clarke wasn’t sure she could control her emotions if she saw Lexa alive out in the open and the last thing she wanted to do was make her look weak in front of hose already judging their potential relationship.

 

She freezes when she hears the sound of horses approaching and “Heda” being said by the warriors outside. Hears Lexa’s tired voice telling her warriors that come night they will feast but now, she needed rest. She hears Indra’s voice telling her that “Klark kom Skaikru is in your tent. She is waiting to speak with you.”

 

She hears no response from Lexa and she isn’t know what to think. Was she speechless because she wanted her? Was she quiet because she was upset that some random sky person was in her tent?

 

The tent flap swings open and Clarke startles for half a second. Standing before her was Lexa. Standing alive and real, not a consciousness in a flame, not a higher being taking her face. It was her and she was real. Emerald greens eyes she dreamt about, soft curls in her intricate grounder braids, long coat around her slender frame, swords crisscrossing across her back.

 

Clarke searched her eyes, those stunning eyes, looking to see if she had any memory of her. What she saw in those eyes wasn’t anger or confusion—she saw shock, the hope, the love.

 

“Klark,” the name left her lips and Clarke is hit with how much she missed her voice.

 

“Lexa,” she breathes out. Lexa’s entire posture relaxed and the Commander mask dropped as she stepped towards her. Clarke closed that gap with a sot cry leaving her lips, throwing her arms around Lexa’s strong shoulders. he clings to her, feeling her soft hair under her shaking hands, face buried in the crook of her neck. She smelt like Earth, the woodsy smell soothing her.

 

Lexa held her equally as tight, an arm around her quivering shoulders, fingers threading through her soft blonde hair free of tangles and berry stains. “We met again,” Lexa whispered against her shoulder.

 

Clarke lets her go, reaching up to stroke her cheek. “You’re real.” A small smile graced Lexa’s lips. “I never though I’d see you again.”

 

“I’m right here,” Lexa says softly. Her eyes flicker down to Clarke’s lips and it was Clarke who took that leap. She captures Lexa’s lips in her own, kissing her deeply and lovingly. She kissed her as if to make up for all the time she had wasted with her. She kissed her to burn the memory, the feeling, the taste into their minds for all of time. Lexa kissed her back, willing her love and sincerity and hope to transfer over. She wanted Clarke to know how much she loved her, how much she loves her. Wants her to know this second chance, this knew life, was theirs and nobody, not Nia, not the Mountain Men, could ever take it away form them this time.

 

Life was about more than just surviving. This time, this time they would live.

Chapter 5: Remembrance

Notes:

Bold italic is spoken in Trig

Clarke traced her fingers down Lexa’s back, tracing the intricate tattoo that went down it. She was hit with a memory, of what felt like a lifetime ago. A time where she had finally let go of the anger she had held onto long after it faded and spent an evening, the best evening of her life. She had explored every inch of Lexa’s body, ignoring the clock closing in on them. After she had laid behind her, tracing the tattoo on her arm and then her back and Lexa told her the story of how she got it after her ascension.

 

“I can feel you thinking, Klark,” Lexa says lazily. “Rest. We have hours until we need to leave this tent for the feast. Once we leave we won’t be back here until the morning to have a quick nap. We won’t get another chance to rest for a day until we know where to go from here and how to do it…tell me what you’re thinking?”

 

“Just remembering something,” she says with a smile, scooting forward to press a kiss to the back of Lexa’s neck. Lexa just hums. “Our story was cut too short before.”

 

“Mine was. Yours wasn’t.”

 

“For a long time I was just surviving. I forgot how to live for a while.”

 

“And life is about more than just surviving.”

 

“That’s my line,” Clarke says with a chuckle but her tone is off. She remembers who last said that line. Lexa rolls onto her back when she sense Clarke is off. She looks at her, eyebrows furrowing. Clarke sighs.

 

“Clarke? What are you really thinking about?” Lexa’s voice is soft, gentle, and it makes Clarke’s heart melt.

 

“The last person to say that line.”

 

“Madi.”

 

Clarke looks at her with wide eyes. “You remember her?”

 

“No. Not fully…the flame has its memories, too. I don’t remember being there, but there’s things I said and saw that the flame showed me. Things I said to a young Commander trying to get through to you—Madi kom Lowada Kliron Kru. I don’t remember being there but I know what the flame tells me.”

 

“She was six when I met her. Wild little thing. We were the last people earth, my friends went back to space and everyone else was in a bunker or dead. The death wave jumped over Shallow Valley but the radiation didn’t. It killed everyone including her parents. She thought I was a Flamekeeper when I asked her if she was a Nightblood. Never expected a small child to lead me into a bear trap then proceed to attempt to stab me to death. If she hasn’t stabbed my arm and saw that I had Nightblood, too, she wouldn’t have stopped. Her parents wanted her safe and hid her under the floor so nobody knew they had a nightblood child.”

 

“People will go through great lengths to protect their children. When I saw Aden after I woke up back in Polis, he ran over and threw his arms around me. After that they all did. I saw the disapproving look on Titus’ face but he didn’t dare say anything. All I could think of in that moment was how I wanted them all safe no matter what happens to me.”

 

“Maybe they will be,” Clarke muses. “I became a Nightblood from Luna’s bone marrow. To distribute bone marrow would be impossible. But we know that nightblood works. My mom and Raven were working on creating a serum based off of Nightblood. They only had under two months before, but now we have a year. When they get down, and I know they will, they can make it. If everyone’s a nightblood then there won’t be a conclave again. A new way to declare a Commander can be figured out.” Lexa nods slowly. “There was seven Natblidas?”

 

“Yes. I guess Madi is number eight but nobody needs to know that.”

 

“They already do,” Clarke closes her eyes. “Wonkru. Everyone who survived Praimfaya knows she’s a Natblida. What happens if someone finds her in Shallow Valley and brings her to Polis?”

 

“Then she won’t be any safer than the rest of them. Tonight after the feast, we’ll ride for Shallow Valley if that’s what you wish.”

 

“You’d do that for me?”

 

“Don’t you know, Klark? I’d do anything for you.”

 

****

 

“Yu laik Natblida, sha?”

 

“Teach me how to do that? Wait, come back! Please!”

 

“Ai laik Klark kom Skaikru. Yu laik?” “Madi…kom Lowada Kliron Kru.” “Hi, Madi.”

 

“That?” “That’s the rover. Want to go for a ride?” “Sha!”

 

“Once upon a time there was a castle in the sky. The people who lived there were scared of the ground below. But the castle was dying so they decided to send the bad children down to the scary place to see if they could survive. In the beginning there was a hundred of them.” “A hundred and one, counting Bellamy.”

 

“I’ll cook for a week and clean up.” “Two weeks.” “Deal. I’ll drive!”

 

“I’m sorry they left without you.” “Well, I’m not. If I was with them, I never would have met you.”

 

“Are you really going to shoot a kid?” “Why not? She shot me.” “First of all, because she’s a kid.”

 

“He tried to help me, I think he’s a good guy.” “There are no good guys.”

 

“Bellamy? Clarke knew you would come.”

 

“I thought you’d be funnier.”

 

“Madi is a big fan. She has heard every story about the girl under the floor.”

 

“Clarke! If we go back, Diyoza will kill you.”

 

“I did it to protect you.” “That’s my job.”

 

“Bellamy, if you do this, she will never forgive you.”

 

“You served with honor as the royal guard of Lexa kom Trikru. You believed in her, now believe in me.”

 

“I thought was love is weakness? Isn’t that what the Commanders in your head tell you?” “Yes…all but one.”

 

“What if I never see you again?” “You will.” “How do you know?” “Because you may be the Commander but I’m the Commander of Death and I say, ‘we will.’”

 

“Sheidheda.”

 

“I’m not the Commander anymore.”

 

“Picasso comes with the house.” “We can keep her?”

 

“Ai hod yu in, Klark!”

 

“How are you here, Seda?”

 

“I’m doing this for my family.”

 

“Say something, Madi. Say something!”

 

“It’s okay. I know you don’t want to leave me, but you have to go now. This gives you a chance to live. Let go, Madi. I’ll be okay. I love you forever, Madi.”

 

Madi jumped up from her cot under the floor. It takes her a moment to realize she didn’t smack her head. Then she realized she shouldn’t be under the floor because it didn’t exist anymore. McCreary had bombed it. Then she realized the reason she didn’t smack her head was because she was two feet shorter.

 

“What?” She looks at her little hands, her old clothes. She feels her hair, messy and unbraided. She looks around the space and sees what used to be littered with pages she snagged from Clarke’s sketchbook was bare. “No, no. Klark? Klark!” She shoves the ceiling, or floor depending on what side she was on, up and scurried up into the hut. “Klark!”

 

“What are you doing up here? You know better!” A voice comes and she slowly turns. She had almost forgotten that voice.

 

“Nomon?”

Chapter 6: Heading to Earth

“Are we really building a wall if these people are really our friends?” Finn questions as Bellamy swings his axe into the small tree.

 

“What happened to being a peacekeeper?” Murphy asks, wiping sweat off of his forehead with the back of his hand. Bellamy, Murphy, Wells and Miller were cutting down lumber to build the wall. Finn was out helping them but he was talking more than working. He hated the idea of Clarke out there with the Grounders—he tried hard not to be but he was unable to stop it. Jasper and Monroe were running point inside the wall while Monty and Harper were looking to see if there was more salvageable parts of this ship than there were last time even though deep down they all knew there wasn’t.

 

“The Grounders were going to have me tortured and executed, after they killed how many of our people then went to war against us?”

 

“After you killed eighteen of their people,” Bellamy gives him a pointed look.

 

“They had—I thought they had Cl…our friends.”

 

“You almost said Clarke, didn’t you?” Wells asks, sparing him a look. “You killed eighteen people in Clarke’s name? She would never want you to do that.”

 

“You think I don’t know that?!?” He snaps in annoyance.

 

“Hey!” Bellamy gives him a warning look.

 

“Who put you in charge again, huh? After how many people died under your leadership last time?”

 

“I did,” Miller says, an edge to his tone. “Murphy did. Clarke did. Octavia, Jasper, Monty, Harper, Monroe, Fox. We all trust him and Clarke to lead us. Clarke is negotiating with the Grounders and Bellamy is in charge here until Clarke returns and then they co-lead. Until they say they don’t want it, we look to them. They got us through the Ring of Fire, saved us from Mount Weather, from ALIE, Praimfaya, Eligius, Sanctum, the end of the damn human race. Whatever we face now, we want them helping us through it. They know where they messed up before and what went wrong before and know how to be even better leaders this time.”

 

“Definitely learned from our mistakes,” Bellamy says confidently but Miller and Murphy knew better. Irradiating Mount Weather, following Pike and then Cadogan haunted him still. He still felt the guilt of Lincoln’s death, Kane’s arresting, his friends’ torture on Bardo. He felt responsible for the rise of Skairipa which was the gateway for Blodreina.

 

“I hope you’re right,” Finn says, “or we all are going to end up dead.”

 

“They’re right,” Wells says.

 

“You weren’t even there! You didn’t see what I saw, Wells.”

 

“No. But I know Clarke and if she trusts him with everyone’s lives then I trust his judgement. Clearly him being an ass was a phase,” he gives him a look, telling him he remembered “whatever the hell you want” and holding him down while his boys pried his wristband off his wrist. But everything they said they went through—a war, sociopaths stealing their marrow, a rogue AI, another apocalypse, another war, end of the world—he was there that long, side by side with Clarke. He hadn’t lied about his mistakes, he told them how he and Clarke fought, and boy did they ever fight. How he chose to irradiate the mountain with her, how he chose the wrong side and even though he didn’t pull the trigger himself he still felt responsible for his sister’s boyfriend’s execution. How he chose a belief, one that ended up true but that’s not the point, over his family. How he was willing to hand over Clarke’s daughter (Wells was still wrapping his head around that) to his leader which resulted in her pulling the trigger that ended his life.

 

“Clearly mine was too,” Murphy says, clearing his throat.

 

“Sure about that?” Bellamy asks with a smirk. Murphy shoves him with a laugh.

 

“Come on guys,” Miller says but they all see the smile he’s fighting. “Walls not gonna build itself.”

 

****

 

“Three days.”

 

Abby surveys the pod, happily surprised with the progress.

 

Raven raises an eyebrow at her. “Last time I had it fully functional and heading to Earth in nine days by myself, in secret, with a faulty part. You really surprised with Sinclair’s help and with everything we need thanks to you, Kane and Jaha that it’s ready three days in? We need to pack supplies and double check everything but there’s no reason it can’t drop tomorrow.”

 

“No, I shouldn’t be surprised should I?” She chuckles, remembering everything Raven had done that should be damn near impossible. She had rebuilt this very same pod all on her own in nine days and made it to Earth on her own, somehow created a ring of fire while paralyzed and bleeding out, built a radio to reach the Ark out of a remote control car, survived spinal surgery without anesthetic or even pain meds, learned to walk again with a paralyzed leg, survived being drilled for bone marrow in Mount Weather, survived and fought off ALIE, got herself and seven others back to the ring, got them down six years later, and from what others told her is the one who bought them all time so Octavia could end the last war. Octavia. That was a whole other thing she had yet to process. She still struggled to separate Octavia Blake from Blodreina and escape the guilt of her part in turning the girl into that monster.

 

“Abby?” Abby shook herself out of the haze. “I said your name three times. Where’d you go?”

 

“The bunker.”

 

The younger girl’s face softens. She knew the horrors there—it took a while for them to get the whole story from Niylah but she had finally learned of what they went through down there. She knew the effects of Abby’s drug addiction first hand, spurred from her knowing Clarke was alone on Earth and the cannibalism combined.

 

“Octavia was with you? Before the…reset?”

 

“Yeah,” Raven says slowly, hauling her bag over her shoulder. She starts her walk back to earth monitoring and Abby keeps stride with her. “She wasn’t the same girl from the bunker, Abby. She was our family again before we came back. But I think that’s a story for her to tell you herself when we get down. And we will.”

 

“You’re right, I will make it down. But when Jaha and Sinclair get the Ark to the ground. I won’t be the one going down with you in the morning.”

 

****

 

“Ready?”

 

“No,” Raven says, arms wrapping around Abby. Abby rubs her back lovingly, sighing. Clarke, Raven. The idea of both away from her would hurt but she knew they’d look out for each other. Clarke, Raven, Bellamy, Octavia and the others would all have each other’s backs.

 

“I’ll keep her safe,” Kane says with a smile. “Or she’ll keep me safe.”

 

“That one,” Abby laughs wetly. As much as she wanted to go with Raven and as much as it stung to send the man she loved down with her, Kane was better fit for Earth. He was the first of them to meet Lexa and stood behind the young commander, he had befriended Indra of all people and his face had lit up that first time in Polis. He had strived to learn Trigedasleng and believed in the grounders and wanted to learn and respect their ways. If the grounders had no memory, Kane was the best adult to have down there.

 

“Tell Clarke I love her,” Abby tells them, stroking Raven’s cheek.

 

“I will,” Raven promises.

 

“I love you too,” Abby tells her, sincerity in her voice. She hugs her tight one last time before letting her go to put her suit on.

 

“You’re my family,” Raven repeats Abby’s own distant words to her, eyes glistening. “I’ll always love you.” Abby wants to embrace her again, but she’s pulling her suit on.

 

“We’ll radio the moment we’re safe on the ground,” Kane says as Sinclair hands him his own suit.

 

“Be safe,” Abby tells him. Kane searches her eyes before he lands down and kisses her goodbye. “You, too.”

 

“We need to clear out,” Sinclair tells Abby.

 

“Raven! When you see Nate—”

 

“I’ll tell him,” Raven reassures. She puts on her helmet with the raven decal on it as Sinclair herds Abby and Jackson out. Behind the sealed door they wait. They wait for a few minutes until they hear the sound of the pod deploying, feels the shake. Out the window they watch the pod hurdle towards Earth.

 

Abby holds her hand against the window, whispering, “may we meet again.”

Chapter 7: Invitation

Notes:

Bold Italics is spoken in Trig.

If anyone has any suggestions for what they'd like to see happen in upcoming events (Skaikru coming down, Mount Weather prior to infiltrating, infiltrating Mount Weather, Nia/Roan/Ontari/Azgeda, handling effects of Praimfaya such as radiation/black rain, Praimfaya, Eligiu, ect) feel free to comment! I have plenty of my own ideas and can't do everything everyone wants but I can take it into advisement and work ideas into it if it fits! :)

“Heda? Indra is ready to go to the Skaikru children.”

 

Clarke looks from the tent flap to where the voice came from and back to Lexa. Her brow furrows. “What is he talking about?”

 

“We’re feasting tonight. I thought your friends would like to come have a proper meal. And the ones who died before or in the mountain could see that we are not their enemies anymore. We can show them, not just tell them.”

 

Clarke smiles at her, love in her eyes. “I’m sure they’ll appreciate it. Sending Indra is a good idea. Bellamy, Miller and Murphy know her. So does Monty and Harper.”

 

“Tell her to go. Tell her to bring Oktevia kom Skaikru with her as well. Let it be known the children from the sky are welcomed here and that any resistance to them will be punished.”

 

“Sha, Heda.”

 

Clarke doesn’t bring up what she means by punishment and Lexa doesn’t offer an explanation either. “Once your friends come we won’t have time alone in a while,” Lexa reminds her when Clarke flops back down. “When we feast I’ll be out there as Heda. You’ll be able to be by my side if you choose, but that’s all. Even in binded couples, open affection is frowned upon. I imagine you’ll want to enjoy the night with your friends.”

 

“I had a long time with most my friends, I had such a short time with you.”

 

“We have a long time ahead of us now.”

 

“That’s not guaranteed.”

 

“You’re right. But we can’t live afraid of what might happen, Clarke. That’s not how you live, Clarke. That’s just surviving.”

 

“And life is about more than just surviving,” Clarke answers with a gentle smile. She tugs her arm gently. “Come on. Lay with me a bit longer before we have to go out there.”

 

Lexa lays back down beside her, wanting to soak up the moments of relaxation while she had it. They all knew full well that after the feast, talk of what to do about Azgeda and the Maunon would happen. They wouldn’t laugh and feast and relax until it was all over. And even then, Praimfaya lurked a years’ time away. Creating Nightblood and distributing it wouldn’t be the hard part, no getting her people to accept it would be the hardest part of that.

 

“I can feel you thinking,” Clarke says, repeating her words from that morning.

 

“Hard not to,” she murmurs.

 

“Outside of this tent you are the great Heda of the twelve clans. But right now inside of this tent you’re just Lexa kom Trikru.”

 

“I wish it was that easy, Clarke.”

 

“It can be, if you just let it. The Commander may need to ensure everyone survives, but it’s your job to live.”

 

“Maybe you’re right.”

 

“Maybe?” she raises an eyebrow at her.

 

“You’re right,” she huffs, green eyes rolling. She rests her forehead against Clarke’s with a soft sigh. “The future ahead isn’t going to be easy.”

 

“That’s why we have to enjoy the moments we have in the moment before we have the weight of our people on our shoulders again.”

 

“You said our people.”

 

“Considering you sent Indra to get my friends, I think my clan is now one of yours all over again.”

 

“If they want to be.”

 

“They will.”

 

“How are you so sure?”

 

“Because you, Lincoln and Indra are here to show them that we aren’t so different and together is better than apart.”

 

“I hope you’re right.”

 

“Everyone learns from their mistakes…well, mostly everyone. I can think of a few who probably didn’t.”

 

“I’d rather not talk about Nia or the Maunon.”

 

“We don’t have to talk at all.”

 

That brought a smile to Lexa’s lips, remembering the last time Clarke said that. Their last blissful moment in the last life. Clarke didn’t hesitate to cup her cheek and press her lips to hers, kissing her deeply and passionately to drown out the fears and uncertainties of the future ahead.

 

****

 

“Why did you ask Linkon to stay behind?” Indra asks, looking to her former—or maybe current—second. Ever since they arrived at TonDC the two had been inseparable and she hadn’t missed Octavia’s duck of her head and the confusion painted on Lincoln’s face when she asked him to stay and make sure there wouldn’t be resistance to bringing back ninety-eight teenagers.

 

“I have to tell him.” She didn’t need to elaborate for Indra to know what the child was talking about.

 

“You do not. That is the past. This is now.”

 

“It’s eating away at me, Indra.”

 

“Even now? After all this time?”

 

 “I see the faces looking at me back at the village. Faces of relief, some of anger. Faces from the guard, the fighting pits. There’ll be faces from every clan. Faces of those who died and their time in the bunker is the last thing they remember. No time passed for them.”

 

“If anyone says anything—”

 

“Indra.”

 

“It is my job to protect you this time, Oktevia kom Skaikru. Unless you want out of your duties.”

 

“Duties…didn’t think you’d want me to be your seken again after last time.”

 

“You were always a good seken. You made me proud.”

 

“But then Skairipa. Blodreina.”

 

“Blodreina was just as much my fault as yours. Mine, Gaia, Abby, Kane. Everyone who defied you. We were all Blodreina. If you must tell Linkon about the time in the bunker, of the Dark Year, then tell him that we were all at fault. If anyone says anything about it to you then I will gladly tell them that myself.”

 

“I wonder if Clarke is plagued by Maunon, by turning on us to McCreary. If Bellamy is plagued by slaughtering the army with Pike. If Jaha is for ALIE.”

 

“Everyone feels their demons. But this is a second chance, child. What we’ve all done is now undone. Everyone has a second chance. You won’t have the weight of the world on your shoulders after Praimfaya, Clarke won’t be left alone to tackle the Mountain, Bellamy won’t start a war. We’re already working together and establishing peace. Thirteen clans working as one. Heda will deal with Nia when it comes to it like she did before.”

 

“I get it now.” Indra gives her a questioning look. “Why she let the missile drop on TonDC. Why she left us at the mountain. She went through great lengths to ensure the survival of her people at the costs of others. We were no different in the bunker.”

 

“When the lives of the human race rests on ones shoulders, the journey is never easy. I will always regret allowing you to take the burden all by yourself. As your mentor it was my responsibility to guide you.”

 

“If it makes you feel better, I blamed Abby and Kane way more than you.”

 

“It does, a little. They weren’t the ones who swore to council you though.”

 

“Technically they did.”

 

“Well that can be discussed later…we’re here.”

 

Indra slowed her horse, allowing Octavia to ride ahead of her. She steered Helios through the entrance of the wall that was in progress. She hears the stunned whispers as they all ogled at her horse. And maybe at her in her Grounder clothes and the braids Lincoln weaved through her hair that morning.

 

“O!” Bellamy was the first to approach, a relieved smile on his face.

 

“Where’s Clarke?” Murphy asks, following.

 

“She’s back at TonDC with Lexa.” She doesn’t miss confusion painted on some of their faces or the bitter look on Finn’s. “We have our peace. We’re actually here to talk about that.”

 

“We?” Miller questions.

 

“Indra?” Octavia calls and the older woman rides her horse through the gate. She hears startled and excited gasps from the kids seeing a Grounder riding in. Octavia’s reminded that very few of them lived long enough to see the alliance with the Grounders.

 

“Indra,” Miller approaches with a smile. He had grown fond of her through their years in the bunker.

 

“Heda sent us to retrieve you. Tonight we feast and you’re all invited to join.”

 

Excited voices are heard after a beat. “Real food?” “Yes!” “Hell yeah!” “Thank god, I’m starved.”

 

“Hello, Helios.” Octavia hears a familiar voice say. She glances down and sees Harper stroking the horse’s muzzle. He nickers and bops her hand when it stops. She smiles and resumes petting him gently.

 

“Alright, let’s go then!” Bellamy’s voice booms. “Let’s not make them wait. I know we’re all hungry.”

 

“Want a ride?” Octavia asks Harper, holding her hand out.

 

“Hell yeah,” she takes her hand and climbs up behind her before shooting Monty an apologetic glance. He had Jasper back, the walk would give them more time to catch up. Harper always wanted to learn to ride and was determined to learn before Praimfaya ravaged the Earth once again.

 

****

 

Clarke leveled her gaze, blue eyes piercing Anya’s brown. The two had been in some version of a staring contest the last few minutes. Gustus had refused to meet her gaze at all and Clarke had briefly wondered what Lexa had said to him. Anya though let no fear show. She had keep a direct glare at her.

 

Clarke hears footsteps approaching and knows it’s Lexa when the chair beside her is pulled back and the person sits beside her. “Clarke.”

 

“Hm?” Clarke doesn’t look away from Anya.

 

“Anya.” Anya doesn’t even acknowledge her Commander, refusing to break her gaze from the Sky Girl.

 

“Gustus?”

 

“Sha, Heda?”

 

“This…what are they doing?” She gestures to her former mentor and her lover.

 

“Trying to win dominance it seems. Whoever looks away first is the weakest.”

 

“Hm. Strange way of doing so.”

 

“Sha, Heda.”

 

“Skaikru will be here soon, Clarke.”

 

“Cool,” Clarke says, narrowing her eyes. She had no idea what glaring right back at the warrior would accomplish but when she caught her glaring at her she just couldn’t look away.

 

“Are you just going to ignore them, too?”

 

Clarke broke Anya’s gaze then—she’d rather lose to Anya then to upset Lexa. She huffs when she sees a smirk playing on the Commander’s lips instead of a frown. “Really?”

 

Lexa shrugs innocently. “You’ll never make friends if you defy her at every moment you get. Anya is chief of TonDC, if you and your friends want to be greeted peacefully you might want her for you and not against you. Just because I said you were to be welcomed here doesn’t mean she has to like you.”

 

“I don’t particularly…dislike them.”

 

“But you don’t particularly like them.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“You don’t need to.” She doesn’t miss the look Clarke gives her. “She’s allowed to dislike you until she’s given reason to like you. Her orders are to not harm any of you, not to be friends.”

 

“Fair,” Clarke nods. “I’m sure we’ll come to an understanding.”

 

“I hope so,” Anya grumbles. She wasn’t fond of the idea of befriending anyone from Skaikru, but she also knew fighting with them all the time would be exhausting. Especially since the one she had the most history with was the one who was becoming close to the Commander—has become close to the Commander. And another one, the one Lincoln had betrayed them for, was Indra’s seken. She was still wrapping her head around that one.

 

“Your friends are here,” Lexa tells Clarke, nodding in the direction that Indra had appeared astride her horse. Octavia followed, a blonde girl Lexa didn’t recognize behind her. As the large group follows the horses, she realizes that she really only recognized very few. Bellamy, sourness following as she remembers he was the one who had slaughtered her sleeping army. She has to remind herself that they all had sins and this was a chance to do it all right. She recognizes Finn, eyes flitting to Clarke briefly. She had loved him, mercy killed him, when she met her. She was the reason Clarke had to kill him, but he also had forced her hand. She recognizes another. Jasper she recalls. She had only seen him in the City of Light but it was mostly a blur to her. And a boy she can’t remember the name of. He was in Polis, gentle and comforting to Clarke as she died. Titus was going to use this boy to frame for Clarke’s death but it never worked in the end. Clarke lived and she died, and she had been okay with that.

 

“Come. Let’s greet them.” She ushers Anya who grumbled again but followed dutifully alongside Gustus. Clarke led the way over, Lexa following despite Gustus asking her to stay behind him.

 

“They’re children, Gustus.”

 

“Children sent down for being criminals.”

 

“And what were we to them? You poisoned yourself to try to destroy an alliance, the very alliance Anya died for. You had one of the children tortured for your sin.” That shut him up.

 

“Seriously?” Anya gives him a look. “You tried to make it seem like the children wanted her dead? I was shot trying to get her to Heda.”

 

“You were?”

 

“Klark told us so,” Lexa tells him with narrowed eyes.

 

“I didn’t believe her.”

 

“Can’t blame you,” Anya tells him.

 

“Enough,” Lexa hisses as they approached the sky children. She sees Bellamy and the boy from Polis had minimal reservations on their faces. A few looked curious and guarded, plenty looked nervous, eyes flitting from Bellamy to Clarke to Octavia. Finn looked at her with a sour look as he took note of just how close she stood to Clarke. “Welcome,” she says to them.

 

“Octavia said we were invited here?” Bellamy asks and she hears the reservations in his voice as he tried to figure out if the invitation was a pleasantry or a nice way to cover up the fact they had no choice.

 

“Yes. We are having a feast tonight and you were invited to join. You must all be hungry. After you eat, you may stay the night or be escorted back to your dropship. Those who choose to return and live there will be given supplies to help them through until the rest of your people come down with the Ark, and that includes aid building your wall if you wish. How much we help or don’t help is up to you. Those who want to stay will be welcomed,” she says this looking at Octavia. Octavia gives a short nod with a shadow of a smile. “This is a fresh start. Old sins are forgiven,” her eyes flit from Bellamy to Finn, “tonight we feast. Tomorrow we will discuss what to do about the Mountain. How to take them out without killing everyone.”

 

“We will make sure those who helped us, like Maya and her friends, survive,” Clarke says, nodding at Jasper who smiles finally, “and rescue Echo and the other prisoners,” she sees Bellamy relax but just slightly, “but Cage and Emerson and anyone who helped them will not live. Jasper, Monty, Harper, Miller and anyone else who can tell us who’s friend and who’s an enemy will be asked to join the meeting. But all that’s for tomorrow. Tonight, as the Commander said, is to enjoy our second chance, to eat and make friends because we are all on the same side now and we all need each other.”

 

“This way,” a friendly voice says and Clarke smiles when she sees Nyko. “Lincoln and I will show you were you can rest and get familiar while we wait for the feast.”

 

Most of them followed Nyko and Lincoln. Bellamy, Murphy, and Wells lingered behind. “Clarke?” Murphy approached her. “Emori. What about her?”

 

“With Mount Weather comes the rover. The rover will travel faster and safer through the dead zone than on foot or horseback. Once we have the rover, you have my word that finding Emori will be the priority. She’s not disposable, Murphy. None of our friends are.”

 

“Do you have the ability to give us your word?” He eyes the Commander standing not far from them.

 

“Clarke doesn’t need my permission to make promises to search for her friends. If you were to choose to go on foot, you’d be given provisions. If you chose to ride, you’d be given horses. But she’s right—the rover is your best bet. The dead zone is not an easy trek to make.”

 

“Oh I know. I did it on foot before. All but two of us died doing it. I’m just impatient to find her is all.”

 

“You love her,” Lexa says simply. She doesn’t miss Anya’s head snapping around to face her. Love is weakness is what Lexa had seethed to her ever since Costia’s murder.

 

“Yes.”

 

“Good. Hold onto that, it’ll give you the strength to get through what we must so you may be able to get to her. Come, Clarke. We have a little left to do before the feast.”

 

“I’ll see you soon,” Clarke tells them, mainly Wells, before following Lexa. She expects to be led deeper into the village to speak to others there. But she’s led into Lexa’s tent once again. “What do we have left to do?”

 

Lexa doesn’t respond. Instead she just pulls her into a searing kiss. Clarke could tell it was going to be a long night so she didn’t question it, she just melted into the kiss. She pulls her closer to it, fingers fumbling with the buckle of her shoulder guard. “Too much armor, Heda,” she mumbles against her lips.

 

“Too much is better than not enough,” Lexa responds. Clarke silently agreed—she had wished more than anything that she had armor that could have saved her from the bullet tearing through her last time.

 

Clarke got the shoulder guard off and Lexa shrugged off her trench coat easily before pulling Clarke’s coat off of her. They only had a short amount of time, but they would make sure it counted.

 

****

 

“I want to introduce you to someone,” Clarke says, grabbing Wells’ hand and leading him over to the table she was previously sitting at with Lexa and a begrudging Anya and Gustus.

 

“You’re girlfriend?” he teases and she halts, causing him to bump into her.

 

“I—”

 

“Bellamy and Murphy gave me a full rundown. They may have mentioned the Commander. Several times.”

 

“I don’t know what we are.”

 

“But you love her, right?”

 

“More than anything,” she admits softly.

 

“And she loves you?”

 

“She has for a long time.”

 

“That’s all that matters, then. Not the title. As long as your happy.”

 

“Her being alive again, nothing makes me happier. And once we go find Madi…”

 

“Bellamy said you adopted a kid.”

 

“You’re going to love her,” she smiles longingly. “We’re heading to Shallow Valley at first light unless something bad happens. But come and meet Lexa now. Just don’t call her Lexa, you can call her Heda or Commander. And don’t talk about our relationship status. Never talk about that, especially in public. It’d just put a target on both our backs.”

 

“Got it. No relationship talk and call her by her title, not her name.”

 

“You got it.” She leads him over to the table. Lexa looks up as they approach and the first thing Wells notices is how striking her green eyes are. The second is how her eyes zoomed on his hand interlocked with Clarke’s. “This is Wells. Wells, this is the Commander.”

 

“Hello, Commander.”

 

“Hello.” Her voice isn’t as friendly as his.

 

“Wells was my best friend since we were practically born. We were as close to siblings as could be up on the Ark.” He sees Lexa relax at siblings and ignores the little pang in his chest at it.

 

“You and Clarke grew up together as children?”

 

“Yes,” he nods, “I’ve got a lot of stories of little Clarke.”

 

“Wells!” Clarke hisses and Lexa fights a smile. Clarke sits down beside Lexa, patting the seat beside her. He sits, about the ask the Commander a question when a boom sounded above. They look up to see the familiar burning star like form and Clarke immediately knows who it is.

 

“Raven’s early.”

Chapter 8: I'll Do Better

Notes:

Bold italics is Trig

Well, this has a lot. A little Clexa, a little Linctavia, a little Madi, a snippet of our daily dose of Anya sass.

“Let me go! No! I won’t go back down there, I won’t!”

 

“Stop yelling, child. They’ll hear you!”

 

“They already know who I am. I was their Heda!”

 

“It was just a dream, Madi.”

 

“No, no it was real! It was real, Nomon. Praimfaya, Klark, Wonkru, the flame, Sanctum, Bardo. It was real. Klark is real!”

 

“Klark?”

 

“She found me after you died. She’s a Natblida, like me! She came from the sky. She’ll be a red blood now, her mother was a doctor who turned her into a Natblida…”

 

“Not possible. It’s a dream, child. A dream that plagued you in death. We died, little one. But we aren’t no more, a gift from Bekka herself.”

 

“No! You died, not me! Being a Natblida saved me. And Klark!”

 

Madi takes advantage of her mother’s shock and bolts for the door. Her mother grabbed her, dragging her back from the door. Madi fought back, but her little five year old self had nothing on the young teenage warrior she had become. Her mother forced her back into the hole, closing it on her, wincing every time the child yelled. If anyone discovered she had a child who was a hidden Natblida, they’d all be in trouble.

 

****

“You want to go meet her?” Lexa asks Clarke who had zoned out, head turned in the direction of where Raven’s pod had just landed.

 

“Yes. But Madi…we know Raven will be in good hands with Bellamy and Murphy. Wonkru warriors know about Madi including Azgeda, I need to know that she’s safe. I just need to see her and make sure she’ll be protected. I don’t want to just take her from her parents but she can’t stay there. They know she’s Lowada Kliron Kru. All it’ll take is one warrior to want some sort of gain to go abduct her.”

 

“We can offer her parents protection if they wish it,” Lexa assures her as she stuffs her rations into her saddle bag. “And inform the chief of her village to keep their eyes out.”

 

“Thank you.”

 

As they were finishing preparing their horses, Gustus approached them. “Heda, are you almost ready? The Skaikru boys are ready and are planning on heading their way now.”

 

“Tell them to hold on. They’ll need a guide to get them through safely. Any Trikru warrior who died in the Ring of Fire or the slaughter outside of Arkadia will want their heads. Especially Bellamy’s.” He was there for both. From what she was told, Murphy had been at neither but just being Skaikru was enough. “Where’s Indra?”

 

“She said she as dealing with…personal matters.” The thought of any grounder warrior, let alone a war chief of an entire clan, putting duties aside for personal matters was shocking. But Indra? She kept her personal life locked up tight. They knew her parents were killed by Sheidheda when she was a child. Knew her bonded died in battle. Knew she once had a child. But that was the extent of it—none of her personal matters ever affected her job and that’s why she was such a good leader.

 

“Let her. I’ll have Anya escort them.” Clarke bites back a smile and fights a chuckle. Anya thought she was annoying? She almost couldn’t wait for the cold warrior to meet the likes of Raven Reyes.

 

“Anya won’t like that.”

 

She fixes him a glare. “She’ll listen to her Heda.”

 

“She will, Heda.”

 

“Good. Come, Klark.”

 

Lexa let her grey mare over towards the others, Clarke trailing behind her with the chestnut gelding she was supposed to ride last journey. The moment they reached them Finn approached Clarke. Gustus went to block him but Clarke waves the warrior off.

 

“Clarke, I want to go with them. It’s Raven.”

 

“Bellamy and Murphy will get her, Finn. Trust me, she’ll be more than happy to see the two of them.”

 

“Murphy said that they buried the hatchet, but Clarke. Even though I broke her heart last time and it’s over, she’s still my family.”

 

“Finn, you’re needed here.”

 

“Needed?” He scoffs.

 

“Yes. Octavia talked to Joro, you’re going with them when they hunt later. You’re a good tracker, Finn. But most of you aren’t going to stay here in the village permanently. When the Ark comes down, mostly everyone will join them there. They’ll need a damn good tracker so they don’t spend until Praimfaya relying on Trikru help every time food needs to be hunter or someone wanders off and lets lost. Joro is hard but he’s Trikru’s best tracker and he’s willing to teach you, so don’t blow it. Want to help Raven and everyone? Take your skill and turn it into something that’ll keep everyone alive. Track, hunt, learn anything that’ll be useful because they’re going to need everything they can get to get them through what’s to come.”

 

“You keep sayin they.” She looks down briefly, gathering her thoughts. She didn’t know how he’d take it when she says that she has no intention of leaving Lexa ever again. “Okay, I’ll stay and listen to their tracker.”

 

“Thank you. Take Wells too.”

 

“Aced botany class, right. Well, um…good luck out there.”

 

“You, too.”

 

He walked, more like trudged, away right as Anya approached them. “You asked for me, Heda?”

 

“I need you to escort Bellamy and Murphy to the pod that just landed. One of their people are in it, someone very useful for what’s to come. We won’t take Mount Weather without her.”

 

“Escorting sky children to get another one? Heda, I—”

 

“Anya. You are chief of TonDC, I am Heda. It is your duty to listen to what I say.”

 

“Yes, Heda. Apologies, Heda.” She was unhappy about it, that much was clear. The dirty look she shot at Clarke solidified that. But she knew better to defy her Commander, especially over something as trivial as this. She just hoped these sky children would know how to shut up and leave her be. She stalked off, motioning silently. Bellamy and Murphy followed quickly, catching up to her.

 

“Didn’t think she could hate me more,” Clarke mused as she sticks her foot in the stirrup, hauling herself up onto the horse.

 

“You haven’t seen just how much she can hate yet,” Lexa tells her, getting onto her own horse easily with a smirk.

 

“Thanks,” Clarke huffs but chuckles regardless. “I’d really like to not see that.”

 

****

 

The knock on the door was startling, especially since she had just shooed her noisy daughter down into the hole. Her daughter who nobody knew existed. She opened the door, expecting a nosy neighbor.  But the woman on the other side of the door was not someone she recognized. Her eyes zeroed in on the sacred symbol on a pendant around her neck and she immediately knew she was a Fleimkepa. 

 

“Can I help you?”

 

“I’m here to see your daughter.”

 

“I don’t have a daughter, Fleimkepa.”

 

“I’m just a scout…now. I was a Fleimkepa in the last life. your daughter’s teacher. Madi kom Lowada Kliron Kru.” She sees the woman’s face falter. “Beja. I just want to protect her. After Praimfaya, one hundred people from each clan became one in a bunker. Wonkru. After the bunker we met Madi, we met her through Skaikru’s leader, Klark.” The woman’s eyes widen at that name. “She became our Heda. Everyone from Wonkru still alive when we were freed knows she’s a Natblida and knows where she’s from.”

 

“How do I know you won’t just bring the child, if I even have one, to Polis to your Fleimkepa?”

 

“I would never. I was her Seda and she is important to me. She wouldn’t be with me anyways—Klark kom Skaikru will protect your child with her life. If Madi stays here, she is in danger.”

 

“You want me to give my child away?”

 

“No. You can come with her. But we must go now.”

 

“Do you know who I am?”

 

“No…”

 

“I am Chief of Lowada Kliron Kru. How else do you think I’ve been able to hide my child without a higher up discovering her. After my bonded died, no one questioned my grief in my home and gave me space. Madi was so young, it gave me time to raise her and keep her quiet. I cannot leave.”

 

“Madi cannot stay.”

 

“I can keep her safe. She belongs with her mother.”

 

“Klark raised her, too. She found her when she was six, had her for seven years before the reset. She’s her mother, too.”

 

“She may have raised her but only because I died. If I lived, Madi would have never met her.”

 

“But you did die and Clarke did raise her. I know it’s hard, but you need to do what’s best for your daughter.”

 

****

“You wanted to go with Indra, I know you did,” Lincoln murmurs, fingers tracing down her arm where her tattoos once were. The very tattoos that he had done himself. She had sat on the chair for a long time, teeth gritting but refusing to admit she was in pain or to take anything for it. It had taken weeks to complete the intricate designs.

 

“I wanted to be with you more.” She glances up at him before nodding at a satchel.

 

“What’s that?” his curiosity piques but he doesn’t move from where he’s laying behind her, fingers not ceasing their strokes.

 

“Can you do my tattoos again?”

 

“Now?”

 

“No…but soon.”

 

“It’ll hurt.”

 

“I know. But I have a…story to tell you to distract me.”

 

“Maybe we should do that now,” he murmurs, stroking ceasing. “The story…whatever happened in your past is eating away at you. I hate seeing you so upset, I can’t help you if you don’t talk to me.”

 

“I don’t wat you to look at me differently.” She switched back to English which told him it was more serious than he thought. Though English was her language, she had adapted to Trigedasleng fast and preferred to speak in their common tongue when she was with just him or Indra. He had been born into Trikru but she chose it and it awed him every day.

 

“There’s nothing you could do for that to happen. Octavia…”

 

She sits up and leans over to grab the satchel. His fingers trail down her bare back as she does so and she shivers. She puts the satchel down and turns around to face him, pulling him into a searing kiss.

 

He runs his hands down her sides and she shudders against him. He grabs her hips and pulls her onto his lap, kissing her deeper. They had spent more time on the pile of furs in their tent than out there, their clothes sitting in an untouched pile since after the feast the night before. He had pressed his lips down her body, hands memorizing every inch of her. And she had done the same when it was her turn. For him, he had woken up with groggy memories of having her just an hour before her death, kissing her and conveying all his love before a reaper stick rendered her unconscious. But for her it had been seven long years without him.

 

“Ai hod yu in,” she breathes against his lips. “I want you.”

 

“You have all of me, ai hodnes,” he tells her, laying her back against the pillows gently. She wraps her legs around his hips, a firm grip on his muscular shoulders as he kissed her neck, sucking on her soft skin. His lips moved lower, and lower.

 

****

 

“You brought reinforcements?” The woman, Kyra, snaps at Gaia. Madi looked from her Seda to her mother, brow furrowing.

 

“No, I came alone,” Gaia makes out. She peers out the window when the sound Kyra heard reaches her ears. Horses, people talking. “Heda.”

 

“Heda Leksa?” Madi asks, excitement in her voice. She remembers the Commander in her head. She was her favorite. She was who she trusted the most, at least until Sheidheda locked her away. She had soft brown curls that Madi thought looked so soft, stunning green eyes and a warm smile. She also loved Clarke, and Clarke loved her.

 

She remembers seeing Clarke’s devastated face at Mount Weather as Lexa admitted her deepest regret. “Commander’s die, Madi. All of them.” She remembers how Lexa felt as she died, how her only concern was Clarke’ safety. “I thought love was weakness. Isn’t that what all the Commander’s in your head tell you?” They all had, all but the one who assured her that her love for Clarke was her strength. “Yes. All but one.” She sees Clarke in a tent, “maybe life should be about more than just surviving,” hears Lexa’s voice as she dies, “you were right, Clarke. Life is about more than just surviving.” So when Clarke told her, “this is how we survive” she repeated those words back to her: “life is about more than just surviving” and she saw the broken look on Clarke’s face.

 

“Yes…” Gaia looks at her with an unreadable expression.

 

“What is it, Seda?”

 

“Heda isn’t alone.” The tender smile tells her who it is.

 

Madi is running for the door before her mother can grab her. She gets the door open, charging down the steps. She sees her atop a gorgeous copper horse. Sees her dismount. “Clarke!” Sees her look in her direction. Meets her eyes.

 

“Madi!” She’s running to her, dropping down to her knees in time for the bulldozer of a five year old to slam into her, arms gripping her tightly. Clarke held her, a happy sob erupting from her throat. “I’ve got you,” Clarke says soothingly and Madi thinks it’s to center herself. “My baby, I’ve got you.” My baby. Last she heard that was when she held her, crying when she realized that she had lost her. This time, it was full of hope, happiness.  

 

Clarke seeing her in the woods that day. Clarke stepping into that bear trap. Clarke drawing her pictures and telling her stories. Clarke teaching her all about the rover. Clarke teaching her English. Her teaching Clarke to fish and what plants and berries could and couldn’t eat. Clarke hiding her once then twice from Diyoza’s men. Running to Clarke in the wasteland. Joining Wonkru to protect Clarke. Clarke making her hide her skill. Her defying Clarke and Gaia. Her taking the flame. Clarke taking her away from Polis. Her using Lexa to break through to Clarke. Her leading Wonkru through the gorge. Clarke kissing her goodbye before Cyrosleep. Running to Clarke in Sanctum. Her thinking Clarke was dead and letting Sheidheda take over. Clarke holding a gun to her own head to get her to fight Sheidheda. The flame dying. Clarke giving her Picasso. Clarke being missing. Clarke rescuing her from the reactor. Clarke crying because she killed Bellamy for her. Her arguing with Clarke. Her turning herself into Bardo. Her mind being destroyed. Clarke breaking, the guilt that she broke Clarke. Clarke telling her it’s okay to go. her choosing not to return. Clarke. Clarke. Clarke.

 

“I love you,” Madi chokes out into Clarke’s hair. “I’m sorry I left you. I won’t do it again, I promise.”

 

“It’s—it’s okay, Madi. It’s okay. You’re okay now, you’re safe now.”

 

“Don’t leave me,” Madi whimpers, the five year old part of her coming through her thirteen year old mind.

 

“I won’t,” Clarke promises. “I promise I’ll do better.”

Notes:

Are we wanting to see them up on the Ark or just wanting to stay focused on the ground and we'll see the rest of Skaikru when they land?

Chapter 9: Grounder Princess

Notes:

Bold italics is spoken in Trig

“We’re almost there,” Bellamy says, the woods surrounding them becoming familiar. He was almost certain the little slope they were on was where Raven ad Clarke caught up to them after he stole Raven’s radio from the pod, where he slammed Raven into a tree as she held a knife at his neck.

 

“You’re right. Dropship is what, twenty minutes that way?” Murphy asks, pointing.

 

“Correct. Now quiet,” Anya growls. She doesn’t know why she even bothered. Every time she told the sky boys to be quit, they listened for no more than a few minutes before they began talking again. At least they talked quietly now. And they didn’t step on every twig possible like they had when they first started out.

 

“You think we’re bad, just wait until you meet Raven,” Murphy chuckles.

 

“She talk as much as you two do?”

 

“More,” Bellamy says, “but that’s because she thinks she’s awesome.”

 

“Because she is awesome. She’s cocky because she’s saved our asses more times than we can count. Admit it. After every single Clarke and Bellamy win, there’s a Raven Reyes or Monty Green behind the entire thing.”

 

“What are these…wins?” Anya asks, a hint of curiosity in her hardened voice.

 

“You really want to know?”

 

“Forget it,” she growls.

 

“Murphy,” Bellamy gives him a look. “The ring of fire? Barbecued Grounders? Raven’s work. You guys might blame Clarke for that, sure it was her idea, but Raven did all the work to make it real. Jasper, too. Mount Weather, Raven blew the turbines so our people could get in. Irradiating it, Clarke and I pulled the lever but that was made possible by Monty. Clarke got the blood transfusion and took the flame, but Raven found her the back door.”

 

“Don’t forget, I literally pumped Ontari’s heart with my hand.”

 

“Right.”

 

“Clarke took the flame?” Anya asks in disbelief.

 

“Temporarily. After Lexa, er, the Commander was killed Titus gave Clarke the flame and sent her to go find Luna. Anyways, Luna refused the flame but this crazy bitch ALIE, she was like a woman made from technology, she was mind controlling everyone, right? So Ontari dies, we pump her nightblood through Clarke and insta temporary nightblood she became. She takes the flame, goes into the City of Light where she and her dead girlfriends spirit battle mind controlled zombies, find the hatch courtesy of Raven and Clarke stops ALIE. Then we had Praimfaya to deal with.”

 

“Impossible,” the warrior breathes.

 

“Wish it was,” Bellamy sighs. “ALIE told Clarke in the City of Light. Clarke and I went back to Arkadia while Kane, our leader, and Octavia stayed behind in Polis to help King Roan stay in power. Yes, Roan from Azgeda. He’s a good guy, Clarke and the Commander liked him. There was a bunker to ride it out. We needed Raven so some of us went to get her but we didn’t make it back. By this time Clarke is a real nightblood. Well all of us but her went back up to space. Raven and Monty kept us alive up there for six years.”

 

“Let’s skip to the end when we had a test to decide the entire fate of the human race. I’d like to finish this story before we get to Raven,” Murphy tells Bellamy. “So, Clarke goes in an fails. Lexa dies, Abby died, Bellamy died, Madi died. She was just mad, who can blame her? She fails because her human reaction is too strong or whatever. She was pretty vague about being in that glowing orb. After she failed, Raven went in and as the story goes, she bought us time and convinced the God to let it play out just as Octavia stops the war. Everyone transcended, Clarke couldn’t because she was like the only person ever to commit murder in the test which I kinda find hard to believe, and the lot of us chose to stay back with her. Then we woke up, game reset.”

 

Anya just surveyed them but there’s a shift. The disdain is still there, but it’s not as strong as before. In other words, they weren’t concerned for their life anymore.

 

****

 

“Have you heard from Raven yet? Or Marcus?” Abby asks, pacing. Jackson shakes his head, again.

 

“They might not have even touched down yet. They’ll call, Abby. We sent them a second radio in case one was damaged in the landing, although with Sinclair helping her I doubt anything would go wrong. everything was perfectly secured, you know that. Trust me, I want to hear from them as much as you. I miss Nate.”

 

“I’m sorry,” her shoulders sag.

 

“Have we heard from them yet?” Sinclair asks as he strode into Earth Monitoring.

 

“Not yet, it’s still early,” Abby sighs.

 

“Raven will radio. Trust me, Abby. Last time she rebuilt the radio using a remote controller and car. Even if somehow the radios are damaged, it won’t take her long to fix them. And it’s been four days? If the Grounders remember, it will take the hundred a very short time to reconnect. If they didn’t, knowing your daughter she’d have brokered peace regardless by now.”

 

“I know. I know I sent Marcus instead of me, but I still miss him so much. Clarke and Raven too. Three of the people I love most are on Earth and I don’t know how any of them are.”

 

“You will soon,” Jaha’s voice sounds behind her. The three of them turn to face to Chancellor. Sinclair’s face turns to a scowl when he sees who’s behind him. “Please,” Jaha raises a hand, “hear him out.”

 

“After everything he did?” Jackson demands.

 

“I have my sins,” Pike responds, “but let me help. This is a second chance for us all.”

 

“What happens if we get to the ground and there’s a feud? Is Azgeda and Trikru don’t get along and we face Nia’s wrath again? Are you going to slaughter more innocent villages? Because maybe this time Azgeda won’t kill your people, but in your memory they always do. And you can’t change those memories,” Abby says, eyes staring into his soul. “You can’t change their memories either. Those warriors you slaughtered? Bellamy who you manipulated? Lincoln who you executed after he did so much for us? Octavia? Indra?”

 

“I can’t make promises not to do something in the future. But I can promise I’ll try.”

 

“You’ll try to get rid of your genocidal xenophobic ways?” Jackson scoffs. He was typically one for forgiveness—it took him some time but he had even learned to forgive Murphy for Abby’s demise. But Pike, he wasn’t sure how anyone would forgive the situations he put him in. When they first began their relationship in the early years of the bunker, long before Blodreina, Nate had spent many nights talking of the loneliness when he and Harper where the only ones working with Kane, the only ones actively against the man. Jackson didn’t really live through it, he had been so busy in medical and then under ALIE’s influence, but Nate had told him so many stories that it felt so close to him.

 

“It wasn’t—” Pike sighs, knowing arguing was futile. He knew the young doctor was right and if he wanted a second chance, fighting with them would not be in his favor.

 

“Mount Weather is still out there so the Exodus ship is not optimal. Unless Sinclair can somehow keep the signal working to reach the ground but block it from the Mountain’s interference.”

 

“I could but it’d take longer than we have,” Sinclair admits, “it’d a lot of trial and error since I don’t know their frequency. Raven did, but she’s hurtling to or on earth. Without time, we’d be playing Russian roulette. Maybe Mount Weather doesn’t want to start a war. Or maybe they want to even more because we killed every single person in it. We know what stations made it, we just need to pinpoint exact locations.”

 

Jaha shakes his head. “We need to shift them, actually. Factory made it but because it landed on the edge of a cliff everyone but one poor girl died. We need to determine how to shift it without it being detrimental.” He unrolls a map that Sinclair had sequenced, showing the area the stations had landed.

 

“Alpha station is what we turned into Arkadia,” Abby says, pointing at the spot. “It landed right here, next to the lake.” Jaha places a marker that says Alpha on it.

 

“Mecha landed here,” Sinclair says, placing the Mecha label. “It landed in the woods. We moved everyone to Alpha because with the field and lake it was a better living place. And Factory landed here and went over this place.”

 

“Farm was here,” Pike says finally, touching the spot. “Right in a crater, cliff all around.” Jaha places the marker.

 

“So to shift Factory to say here, can we shift the others?”

 

“Alpha would move here, still enough away from the shore. Mecha would still be in woods but we’ll need to confirm there isn’t a village too close. Looks like Farm would be good too.”

 

“Excellent,” Jaha nods. “Once we confirm with Raven and Marcus we can begin the real planning.”

 

“There is one thing we need to talk about,” Abby says, looking at Jaha with an unreadable look. “Diana Sydney.”

 

****

 

“There!” Murphy goes to run into the small clearing the pod was but Anya grabs him by the collar, pulling him back.

 

“No. Let me.”

 

“That’s our friend!”

 

“And mine may be in the woods ready to shoot any sky person they see,” she growls.

 

“Murphy, let her go first. She’s right, if we get shot by an arrow or speared we’ll do Raven no good. She’s Trikru’s chief, they won’t shoot her.”

 

Anya nods her gruff thanks to Bellamy before walking from the tree line, striding into the clearing. She could feel eyes on her, she knew there were scouts in the trees. “If you know what’s good for you, you will let my companions pass,” Anya says loudly. “Skaikru is under Heda’s protection and is an ally to the coalition!” When she hears no grumble, just quiet acceptance, she calls to the men, “come, you are safe.”

 

“You sure about that?” Murphy asks but he leaves the cover of the trees anyways.

 

“I told them you are under the Commander’s protection.”

 

“I heard, I know Trig. My girlfriend and his girlfriend taught us.”

 

“Your…girlfriends,” that term was so unfamiliar with the term. Bonded was what they always used. “Who are they?”

 

“Emori. She doesn’t have a clan. She’s um…she’s different.” He hated the term the Grounders used. Frikdreina. “Her hand is different.”

 

If Anya was bothered by that she didn’t let it show. “And yours?”

 

“Echo…kom Azgeda—hey, she’s good. I promise you, she is good. She’s one of us.”

 

“She’s Spacekru,” Murphy says. “Spent six years in space with us, Emori, Raven, Monty and Harper.”  

 

“Hm,” is all the warrior says. She finishes the last steps to the pod in silence. She draws her sword out and steps aside so Bellamy can open the hatch. They were hit with a burst of shock seeing two people in the pod and not just one. The first was clearly Raven, the black raven decal on the helmet obvious. That and the familiar groan as she comes to. He gets her out of the harness keeping her in the pod and pulls her out.

 

“Oh god,” she mutters as Murphy helps get her helmet off as Bellamy goes for the other person. “We made it?”

 

“You made it,” he says with a wince, looking her over for injuries he doesn’t find. He assumes the wind was knocked out of her good upon landing and that’s why she was out of it.

 

“Murphy!” realization hits her and she throws her arms around his neck. “Is Kane okay?”

 

“I’m good, Raven,” Kane responds, his voice strained. Bellamy leads him around the pod to them. Kane’s leaning against Bellamy and he looks a bit out if it but uninjured.

 

“Who’s he?” Anya asks, pointing her sword at him. They were on a trip to retrieve a young and, according to the boys, very annoying girl. Not a man older than she was.

 

“Marcus Kane,” he says, holding a hand out. She looks at him with disdain, grimacing.

 

“Grounder princess!” Raven says suddenly in realization. “Grounder princess looks pissed.” “Our princess has that affect.” Bellamy nudges her in the ribs and she winces. “Ow.”

 

“What’d you call me?” Her disdain leaves the man and turns it to the sky girl.

 

“Grounder—you know what, doesn’t matter.” Anya doesn’t look away. “Last time, you met Clarke on the bridge. We called her Princess. So we called you Grounder princess since Clarke was our princess. We thought she was meeting with the grounder leader, not the chief of a clan. We didn’t know there were other clans. And we didn’t know about Lex—the Commander yet.”

 

Anya notes this is at least the fourth sky person who slipped up and said, or nearly said, Lexa instead of Commander or Heda. How casual was Heda with these people?

 

“Let’s go,” she says gruffly after a moment, not commenting on what Raven said. Yet.

 

****

 

“Where are we going?”

 

Clarke looks down at her former daughter. Or was she still? Since her birth mother was alive now, did that mean Clarke was just a person Madi knew? Or does the fact she adopted her and raised her still stand. “You’ll be safe.” If Madi preferred to speak in Trig, she would let her.

 

“Are you hiding me?”

 

“No,” Lexa responds this time. Clarke doesn’t miss the way Madi’s eyes light up in wonder. Lexa had been a hero in the child’s mind when she had the flame, her favorite former Heda. This was like her reaction when she had met the girl under the floor she grew up on stories about, but more magnified. “I thought about it. But then we thought that the safest place for you is by my side. From what Klark told me, most of Wonkru had been strong flame believers. I’d like to believe they’d follow my rule whether they know about your blood or not.”

 

“They would,” Madi says. “The people I knew would.”

 

“I hope so,” Clarke murmurs. She knew whatever they had chosen there’d be risks. If they were going to risk it, they might as well do it where she could have Madi and Lexa both. It was all she ever wanted.

 

“I have a million questions,” Madi says, looking at Lexa with awe again.

 

“Soon, strik won. Once we’re back at camp, you can ask me everything you’d like. We must be quiet on the trip there.”

 

“Could be enemies in these woods?”

 

“Yes. So we must be quiet.”

 

“I will. Until we get back to TonDC.”

 

“Please tell me she’s exaggerating about a millions questions,” she whispers to Clarke.

 

“Wish I could,” Clarke chuckles.

 

Lexa can’t even bring herself to feel anything other than overwhelming joy. She’d answer a million questions to see Clarke’s smile and Madi’s awestruck look. She’d answer thousand more. A million more. They had a second chance and she vowed not to waste a moment of it.

Chapter 10: Lost and Found

Notes:

Bold italics is spoken in Trig

“I lost myself. Not just after you died. I lost sight of everything that made me…me years later.”

 

“What happened?” Lincoln was as patient as ever, letting her work over her words and feelings. The two were sitting on the floor of his tent, leaning back against a pile of furs. His arm was wrapped around her as she leaned against him, seeking his comfort and warmth.

 

“Skairipa.”

 

“Death from above,” Lincoln translates, frowning. The name didn’t suit her and he wonders what the cruel world turned her into without his love to guide her.

 

“All I saw was red. Everywhere. I hated everyone, especially my brother. I know now it wasn’t really his fault. He let Pike influence him, which is on him. But I know now how easy it is for scared and desperate people to follow someone whether they are good or not. I hated him so much. He was there and it was easy to hate him when I couldn’t get to Pike. After what Pike killed you…I hit my brother and I kept hitting him. I couldn’t stop. I didn’t want to stop and that scared me most of all. And he let me.”

 

“All he ever wanted to do was to protect you. I saw him when Pike sentenced us to die. He didn’t realize how far Pike would go.”

 

“He regretted it. I just couldn’t see it, not for a long time. I was just so…blinded by my need for vengeance. We needed Pike to fight ALIE. I spent the whole time wanting to kill him. He saved my life during the fight and the moment I got a chance, the moment the fight was over, I put my sword through him.”

 

“Anyone in your position would have done the same. If he had taken you from me, I know I would too.”

 

“You’re too good to do that.”

 

“Maybe now. But if someone killed you? I don’t think my conscience would win. You are my world.”

 

“Maybe not after the rest of the story.”

 

“Nothing you can say will make me think otherwise.”

 

“How about that when a man, Ilian Trishanakru blew Arkadia up and I made him kneel in the very spot you kneeled and I stood where Pike stood with a gun to his head? Or after Kane stopped me by making me remember your death I ran off and ended up in a cave with him. In the very cave I tried to end my own life and then I kissed him just to feel something but the anger and grief?”

 

“Grief makes people do things they would never do before. Think about Finn. He thought the village had Clarke and he slaughtered them. The same Finn who talked me into getting a meeting with Anya for peace just weeks before. But unlike him, you didn’t pull the trigger.”

 

“I fought in a final conclave for the bunker. I killed two people. Had to kill Ilian when someone put an arrow through his neck, paralyzing him. I killed Luna who Abby turned into a murderer.” She sees him clench his jaw at the mention of Luna. Luna who took in refugees fleeing war and destruction. Luna who hated violence. “I won. And we became Wonkru.” At that name, she grimaces and her voice changes.

 

“Wonkru. What I always said we should be.” The pride in his voice made her tense shoulders relax and she melted back into him.

 

“The bunker could hold twelve hundred people. Floukru was no more. So there were twelve clans again. a hundred people per clan survived Praimfaya in the bunker.”

 

“You saved them all.”

 

“No,” she mutters bitterly. “It gets worse. You haven’t heard about Blodreina yet.”

 

He strokes her cheek, wiping away a stray tear she hadn’t realized she’d shed. “That’s a story for another day.”

 

“I—”

 

“I think Helios would love going for a ride to stretch his legs, don’t you think?” He gets up taking her hand and pulls her up with him. He always knew how to make her feel better, how to get her to relax.

 

“He probably would enjoy a ride,” she admits. “As would I. Don’t laugh if I fall off though, I’m back to no muscle. All the muscle over years, gone in a reset. It’s worth it, though,” she admits, the adoring look in her eyes as she looks at him is evident.

 

They left the tent, noting how quiet it was. Clarke and Lexa had left to find Madi and had yet to return. If she was at her home in Shallow Valley and her birth mother didn’t give them much trouble, they would return by the next morning. Anya, who Octavia was really enjoying seeing the woman’s annoyance and confusion bouncing back and forth much like Indra was in the beginning, had taken Bellamy and Murphy to what they assumed was Raven’s pod. Indra was near the fire with a few other warriors eating the catch of the day that Finn of all people had helped track down with Wells’ and some Trikru hunters.

 

Octavia approached Indra first. “Indra,” she calls, “we’re taking the horses for a ride.”

 

Indra’s eyes flit behind her to Lincoln and she nods, satisfied she’d have a source of protection. She knew once she got more muscle, the girl would be a force but now she was in no condition to fight herself. Especially against angry Azgeda warriors. “Alright. Don’t go past the river, Fid and Artigas said they say Nia’s men nearby. Heda will deal with Azgeda if they cross but she hasn’t returned yet. Until then we must avoid conflict.”

 

“If we see anything at all we will ride back,” she promises.

 

The couple made their way to their horses. Octavia smiled when Helios nickered to her, ears pricking at the sight of her. she strokes his velvety muzzle when she reaches him, running a hand down his white blaze down his face. “You want to go for a run, boy?”

 

The horse seems to understand and bobs his head excitedly. Octavia had picked it up last time that the horse understood certain words. Come, walk, faster, slow, whoa, easy, ride, food, treat, stay, go away.

 

Octavia ran the brush over his soft chestnut fur, combing his mane and tail then picking dirt out of his hooves. She tossed the fur over the slope of his strong back and put the saddle, also donned in fur, over it. she tightened the cinch and he flattened his ears—he hated the saddle being strapped on him. She strapped on the breastplate and he opened his mouth to accept the bit as she pulled the bridle over his ears. “Ready,” she calls and peeks under his neck. She sees Lincoln is finishing bridling his antsy black horse. The horse pawed with his stocky leg, eager to go for a run. Octavia noted all the differences between the two animals. Lincoln’s horse, Badan (which meant Loyal in his native tongue), was a much bigger horse than Helios. He was tall and broadly built. He had a thick neck and a big head with a slipped nose. His legs were stocky, fur all above his hooves with a long, wavy mane and tail. Helios was a decent size and much slenderer than Badan. His neck wasn’t as thick as his but was well muscled, his head dainty. His long, slender legs carried him faster than most of the other horses. She remembers the times before when Helios kept up with the rover.

 

“Ready,” he responds.

 

They mounted their horses and rode off, the village disappearing behind them. The horses picked up speed, Octavia letting Helios pick his speed. Badan cantered at his heels until the path widened and the horses ran side by side. Helios eyed Badan and for a moment Octavia thought her steed would charge forward competitively but he stayed in a relaxed, happy canter. They broke from the tree line and when they did, Helios did charge but out of excitement not competition.

 

“Hold on!” Lincoln yells, remembering her comment about falling earlier. Falling from this speed could be dangerous.

 

Octavia, who already had her fingers knotted in his long mane, responded, “I’m good!”

 

Lincoln relaxed at her confidence at staying on and gave his steed his head, letting him stretch out and chase after Helios’ red blur. Badan tried to catch up but Helios’ picked up speed, snorting and swishing his tail playfully. He was loving this.

 

They gradually slowed at the tree line opposite of the field, halting the horses. “Best not go into the woods. River isn’t far,” Octavia suggests as she pats Helios’ arched neck.

 

“Good idea,” he agrees. He goes to turn his horse but stops. “Hod op. Someone’s there.”

 

“Whoever’s there, come out now!” Octavia shouts in a bout of bravery. Or maybe stupidity. She’d know which when she saw who was behind the trees.

 

A figure emerged from the trees, limping towards them. When they got a clear view of them, Octavia froze. “Oh my god.”

Notes:

Next Chapter:
We discover who Linctavia found in the woods (who do you think it is?)
Clarke and Lexa return to TonDC with Madi and Gaia
Anya, Bellamy and Murphy return to TonDC with Raven and Kane

Chapter 11: Good News, Bad News

“I miss the rover. Walking these distances kind of sucks,” Raven says breathlessly. Ahead of her, Anya rolled her eyes. These people never stopped talking.

 

“We had to walk all the way to you and now all the back. You can’t complain,” Murphy tells her but there’s no bite. The corner of his mouth twitches as he fights a smile. She doesn’t even try to contain hers.

 

“I just spent the past few days rebuilding a pod, got thrown around like a ragdoll during re-entry, hurdled to earth and got knocked out upon landing. So who really gets to complain, huh?”

 

“Raven wins,” Bellamy tells Murphy and the younger man grumbles while Kane, still shaking off the effects of being thrown around in a tin can down to Earth, chuckles in agreeance.

 

Anya fights a hint of a smile. Even she had to admit the obnoxious woman had a point. She thought Lexa was obnoxious as a child but these people, the same age and older than Lexa now, were well more annoying.

 

“Raven always gets to win.”

 

“Ha. Cause I’m more awesome than you, Murphy.”

 

“You might be awesome but I’m immortal.”

 

“Not anymore, technically.”

 

“Once a cockroach, always a cockroach, right?”

 

Anya frowns at that analogy, who in their right mind would call themselves a cockroach with pride? She didn’t understand sky people.

 

“You just need your other half and you’ll be golden,” Raven tells him, a longing in her tone.

 

“You mean your other half, too? You always stole her.”

 

“This again?” Bellamy asks. “So many arguments about that on the ring.”

 

“I remember you grumbling every time I stole Echo when I needed manpower,” Raven gives him a pointed look.

 

“That’s because you always sent her back too exhausted to do anything. She’d down the algae then collapse in bed to sleep. When you asked for her, you had her move machinery all day not sporadically.”

 

“If I had her do it sporadically, she’d be sore all the time and not want to train ever…or other physical activities with you,” Murphy snorts at that and Anya bites down on her lip to keep the smirk at bay. Kane grimaced along with Bellamy. “So doing it all in one day when we needed it done and having her exhausted and sore for a day or two beat constant tiredness and soreness in the long run.”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” he mutters.

 

They only made it a couple more steps before Anya held up a hand. She shushes them and they stain to hear what she heard. Bellamy picks up on it first—a distant whinny from a horse, hoofbeats getting closer. “Down,” Anya growls.

 

Bellamy ducks in the bushes, Murphy following suit pulling Raven with him. Kane lowered himself beside Bellamy. Anya grabbed the hilt of her sword but it became clear to her that she didn’t need it. Her scowl softened when she saw Jorum kom Sangedakru—one of Heda’s guards who had accompanied her on her ride to Lowada Kliron. She sees other horses in the distance, including Heda’s telltale grey mare.

 

“Just Heda,” Anya tells them, “you can get back up.”

 

She walked away from them, heading to the riders. She nods at Jorum before walking to Heda who had just halted her horse. She glances at Clarke and frowns, seeing a young child perched on the saddle in front of her. she doesn’t question it aloud though. “Heda. Everything alright?”

 

“Sha. Klark just wanted to make sure her friend landed alright,” she peers over Anya and sees Bellamy and Murphy, and as predicted Raven. She was surprised to see Kane as well. “Chancellor Kane came with her,” she informs her lover who turns her attention from the little one in front of her to Kane’s direction. She smiles as they approach.

 

“Clarke!” Raven’s the first to greet her with a big smile. Her gaze falls on the child. “Madi?”

 

“Raven!” It was Madi alright—she was younger, cuter, her adorable little high pitch voice melted the mechanic’s heart. “Kane,” Madi says, “you look different with short hair and no beard.”

 

Raven and Murphy laugh at Kane’s expression. “Did you say the same to Bellamy?”

 

“Nope. I’m just seeing all of you. Murphy and Raven look the same. Bellamy looks like he did the day he…” she trails off, looking up at Clarke.

 

“Day he what?” Kane asks, frowning,

 

“Died,” Bellamy answers. “Day I died. It’s a long story, I’ll fill you in at camp. Unless you…”

 

“Didn’t tell him about that. It’s your story to tell, not mine. I just gave him a quick rundown of Cadogan and the higher beings.”

 

“Higher beings?” Anya butts in, frown deepening.

 

“We need to go in depth,” Clarke says, “I gave Lexa a rundown of it too and I bet Octavia gave Lincoln one. But everyone needs to be on the same page and know everything vital that’s coming. Please tell me you have a working radio.”

 

Raven holds her pack up. “We let your mom know we made it, she did respond. Once we’re back at camp she wants to talk to you. Sinclair is planning on when to launch the Ark with Jaha and your mom. Once they have a better idea, we’ll have a meeting. Commander, we’ll need you to okay where the landing spots are when we know better. But it’ll probably be the same places just slight alterations. Alpha would land where Arkadia was, Mecha would land in the woods again…”

 

“Both would be fine, I think. No villages would be affected,” Lexa says and Anya nods with a grimace.

 

“Factory landed on a cliff, which is why we need alterations.”

 

“The cliff was on the edge of Trikru land,” Clarke tells them. “Only one person survived last time.”

 

“No one was affected last time so it should be fine there also, but we need to discuss with the chiefs of Trikru,” Anya suggests and Lexa nods in agreeance.

 

“The problem will be Farm station,” Bellamy sighs.

 

“Where did that one land?” Lexa asks.

 

“Azgeda.”

 

****

 

“Bellamy!” Octavia ran over to her brother when they emerged from the trees and headed into TonDC.

 

“O,” she barely stops in time from colliding with him. He reaches for her in concern. “Did something happen? Is something wrong?”

 

“Yes—no. Something happened but it’s not, I don’t know. Maybe it’s bad, maybe it’s good. Good for you, bad for us in the long run. Or maybe just bad for her—”

 

“Her? Who, O?”

 

“Echo.”

Chapter 12: Echo

“Echo!” Bellamy grabs her, pulling her into a tight hug. He doesn’t miss the way she winces in pain. “Sorry. Are you hurt?”

 

“No.” He doesn’t believe her and looks her over. Someone had given her clothes so the pants and jacket kept him from seeing any injuries inflicted in the mountain but he sees a scabbing would on the side of her head, dried blood that she was in the process of scrubbing away staining her sickly pale cheek. He looks at Octavia but his little sister refuses to answer for his girlfriend. Was she even his girlfriend anymore after what he did for Cadogan?  

 

“How are you here?” Clarke asks, hands shoved in her pockets. “You were in the mountain, weren’t you?” She hears Lexa quietly order warriors to cover the entire perimeter in case this was a trap.

 

“I was. I was let go.”

 

“Why?” Clarke asks slowly, not liking where this was going.

 

“It’s not a trap,” Echo assures her. “It was supposed to be though.”

 

“Explain.” Indra is who speaks this time.

 

“A guard. Emerson. He worked with Nia last time after the mountain was irradiated. I met him a few times, he’s the one who gave the assassin the code to the self-destruct button inside the mountain to blow it so Nia got her war against Trikru and Skaikru. He knew I was loyal to Queen Nia and that I was her most trusted spy at the time. He remembers everything. He wanted to team up with Nia, for her to be their eyes and ears on the ground. He believes I was still loyal to her, I made him believe I still was without a shadow of a doubt. So he set me free with a message for her,” she holds an envelope out to Clarke, not Bellamy, and it stings.

 

“What message?” Lexa, stepping closer so she’s standing by Clarke’s side. Clarke opens the envelope but waits to hear what Echo says before reading it. She would be able to explain it better than scribbled instructions on the page, especially when Emerson must have explained it in length with her before setting her free.

 

“He wants Azgeda to attack Skaikru’s ship. To take as many of them as they could and deliver them so they could use their bone marrow. In exchange, he would give Azgeda weapons and show them how to use them with the promise of not retaliating on them for picking up a gun. As long as Azgeda let them roam free after the war, Nia could keep her crown and rule over the remains of the other clans as long as she leaves them be. No Heda, no enemy clans, she gets all the power? She’d take the deal. She can’t know about the deal. I don’t want to go back there so I came here. I knew you’d be here,” her gaze flits from Bellamy to Clarke to Octavia.

 

“Echo, do you know who’s in charge of the mountain?” Clarke asks.

 

“President Wallace. The second. I heard them talking about how he locked his father up and about how to deal with the resistance within the mountain. There’s people who don’t want to repeat history, who don’t want them murdering kids so they can walk the earth when they’re thriving in the mountain. They’re desperate, that’s why they’re reaching out for outside help. It’s only a matter of time before a civil war breaks out.”

 

“Maya and Vincent are in danger then,” Bellamy says. “They led it last time.”

 

“If we play this out carefully, we can use it to our advantage,” Anya says slowly. “We take out Nia, let them take out each other.”

 

“No!” Clarke and Bellamy say at the same time.

 

“We need to help them. The moment the Ark comes down with their guns, we need to fight the mountain. Together this time. There are innocent people in the mountain, there are children. If we can keep it from everyone being slaughtered and fix what happened last time, we have to!”

 

“Clarke’s right. We owe it to them to help,” Lexa admits and Indra nods her agreeance. “But for now, Nia is our priority. Once the Ark stations come down, we can make a plan for the Mountain. But until they do, we have to focus on what we can do.”

 

“We need Roan,” Clarke says. “He’s on our side. At least he was before his death in the final conclave.”

 

“He will be,” Octavia nods confidently. “We joined teams to take out Luna. Any resentment he had for Skaikru was pretty small. He wants his people to live more than anything.”

 

“There’s someone else who might be willing to help our cause,” Echo says, a thoughtful look on her face, “you won’t like it though.”

 

“Who?” Clarke asks, having a feeling she already knew the answer.

 

“Ontari.”

 

****

 

“Our plan is to sit and wait for the Ark, find a banished prince, work with a psychotic teenager who wanted all of Skaikru dead, attempt to assassinate a ruthless queen to put said prince on the throne and then infiltrate a state of the art bunker with armed, ruthless forces without innocent casualties.”

 

Lexa nods, realizing how insane the plan was now that Clarke laid it out for her.

 

“We did harder things than that before,” little Madi says, looking up from the pad she was drawing on. She wasn’t an artist like Clarke but she still pretty good. After all, it was her sketch of Cadogan’s daughter that led to the events that resulted in her pretty much death in the last life. “Like Diyoza’s ship and the gorge, the Primes, Sheidheda,” the little girl shudders at his name and pauses her recount of horrors momentarily before resuming, “being in the reactor, Cadogan and his men. This can’t be too hard.” Clarke scoffs softly. “Clarke, think about it. You, Heda,” she looks at Lexa with wonder filled eyes, “Indra, Octavia,” another name said with wonder, “Murphy, Raven, Monty, Harper, Echo, Emori will be found, Gaia, Miller, we’ll find Niylah, all these other warriors who follow Heda.”

 

“Who we have isn’t the only thing we need, Madi.”

 

“But you know what to do! You already beat the mountain before. You know the bad guys, you know how you defeated them last time and what not to do this time. So you’re already so many steps ahead of it than last time. Yeah, they remember but you heard Echo! Good guys are fighting them inside, we fight them outside and we can’t lose.”

 

“She has a point,” Lexa says, pouring some water into cups.

 

“And the Azgeda queen won’t know what hit her. I bet you’ll get through to the Natblida girl. You can get through to anyone.”

 

“Also another good point,” Lexa says, handing Clarke and Madi cups.

 

“And with Roan—I can’t wait to meet him, his stories were awesome, and Echo and the Natblida who knows her, you can’t lose that either!”

 

“Maybe she should run our war councils.”

 

Clarke laughs at that, shaking her head. “Maybe she should.”

 

“Okay, now that we got that out of the way…you promised you would answer all my questions,” Madi says, looking at Lexa with wide blue eyes.

 

Lexa nods, sitting on the edge of her bed beside Clarke. “I did.” Madi clambers up on the bed and sits between the two women.

 

“First question. You were only twelve when you became the greatest Heda of all time?”

 

“Not the greatest—”

 

“You were. You are,” Madi insists. “If you were twelve when you became Heda, how old were you when you united all of the clans and created the coalition?”

 

“Fifteen, I think?” Lexa had blocked out most of that year. While it had involved her greatest feat as Heda, it was also the year she had lost Costia. Despite Titus warning her about love being weakness, she had ignored his teachings and had started a budding relationship with her childhood friend. They were just starting to explore their young love when Costia was ripped away from her, the only part that returned was her head. She had closed herself off for so long, believing love truly was weakness, until Clarke came crashing into her life.

 

“And that was two years ago then? This timeline wise?”

 

“Nearly three. All of the clans besides Azgeda had joined months before. Azgeda only joined after Roan’s banishment…after Costia’s death.” Clarke glances at her when she says her dead lovers name.

 

Madi shakes off the somber mood. “Next question! Who taught you how to fight? In all the memories in the flame you’re such a badass.”

 

“Badass?” Lexa frowns and looks at Clarke for an explanation of the foreign word. It didn’t sound appealing to her.

 

“It means awesome or cool,” Clarke explains.

 

“Ah. Well, strik won, it was Anya who taught me to fight when I was no older than you are now. You met her briefly when we joined up with her group in the woods earlier.”

 

“Right! She’s grumpy.”

 

“She is. You’ll get used to it, she’s not nearly as bad as she seems. I trained with her as her seken until I was nine. Then I was sent to Polis to train with the other novitiates under Titus.”

 

Madi scowls. “I don’t like him in the stories.” Lexa gives Clarke a look but the blonde just shrugs unapologetically. He hated her, tried to shoot her and frame her friend and in doing so had killed his Commander. Sure he had pretty much died to give her time to flee but that didn’t mean she was going to paint a picture of him as a good guy in her daughter’s history stories.

 

“That’s okay,” Lexa sighs, “a lot of people don’t like him in person.”

 

“Okay,” her little shoulders relax when she sees her hero was not angry. “Another question. Can you teach me to fight? Clarke and Octavia taught me plenty last time. But I want to be better. Imagine if they teach me and you do too! I’d really be a badass. And I could keep people I love safe.”

 

“Training isn’t a bad idea,” she says slowly, looking at Clarke. Clarke doesn’t even need convincing.

 

“Training will be good. I need it, too. But tomorrow. I just want a little more time to relax before we’re thrown into the chaos of all this planning.”

 

“Sounds good,” Lexa responds with a soft smile.

 

Clarke pulls Madi onto her lap and the former teen doesn’t even complain. She relaxes back against Clarke with a content little sigh. Clarke scoots over so she’s sitting right beside Lexa. The brunette wraps an arm around the blonde’s shoulders and Clarke rests her head on her shoulder with a happy sigh, arms wrapped around little Madi.

 

This. This was home.

Chapter 13: Kill Orders

Notes:

Sorry it's been a bit since I've updated! I got my dream job and it had a grueling orientation of 8 hrs a day orientation (with homework on top) and then in-person training so after my classes I've been just too drained to write.

Today was my first day off in over a week. Spent hours at the barn spending time with and working my horses to make it up to them for not riding on 2 weeks. It's an hour drive each way so I spent a good time of the drive (I wasn't driving) working on this chapter. I hope it's at least decent!

Next few chapters may be updated spottily. Due to the pandemic I a nanny for a little girl who I've babysat since she was 1 who's were still working full time (one was a nurse so frontline) for 2 years. She's 7 and I wrote a lot as she did online school and then when she played mostly independently or with neighbors, so the previous chapters were updated at least 1 a week due to free time. Now that life is normalizing and said child is in school, I got a job (dream job!) so updates may be spotty until I adjust to my new schedule but even if there's sometimes gaps between updates I promise I will update, it just may take time at first!

Also as always, bold italics is spoken in Trig.

Two weeks later

“Let’s go over it one more time,” Indra says at the close of the meeting. She had understood almost everything the young mechanic had said but the confused looks on many of the other stated that they did not.

 

“The Ark comes down in two days’ time. Mecha will land where Arkadia was, just slightly off,” she places a rock on the spot on the map Indra laid out of the territory. “Alpha in the woods. Factory will land by the cliff, the Commander has ordered everyone to stay from that area. Farm will land in Azgeda, the Commander has warriors ready to meet them and stop anyone from Azgeda from harming anyone and steer them to safety. With the Ark here, we’ll have the technology to plan about what to do with Mount Weather while you guys figure out how to deal with the evil Ice Queen.”

 

Anya’s lips twitched at that. The sky girl from the pod was annoying at best, but her witty remarks and sassy demeanor was infectious, she’d admit. Indra started barking orders in Trigedasleng to her generals and the Skaikru members chose to slip out quietly.

 

“Well that went smoother than I expected,” Kane admits to Raven as they left the tent.

 

“It’s good having Indra being able to explain things in a way they understand, huh? I’m glad she understands most of what we say.”

 

“It is.”

 

“Thanks to Octavia.” Kane huffs. “Are you seriously holding things against her? After all this time? When it was Abby who pushed her? Don’t give me that look, Abby admitted it all herself because she felt guilty about everything she did. You let a young adult rule a bunker of previously warring clans alone, forced her hand then blamed her when she messed up and instead of being helpful like the mentor and adult you should have been. You acted less mature than a twelve year old Madi. She changed, long before the reset you know. She became our friend again, our family. And what she did weighed on her every day. You should talk to her, clear the air because if you don’t, you know who’s side Indra and the other grounders will be on. I’m sure she’ll listen to you this time.”

 

“Maybe,” he sighs, thinking of his former mentee. Sure, the dark year had fractured everything. But during Pike, she had been his most trusted ally. She had been the olive branch that gave him his friendship with Indra in the first place. A talk, no matter how painful it might be for both him and the teen, might be just what they needed.

 

****

 

“But it was Abby’s idea,” Lincoln states, eyes focused on his work.

 

“Yeah but I still did it,” she winces at the needle injecting the ink into her skin. She had forgotten how much getting the tattoo had hurt. It didn’t hurt nearly as bad as her recount of the dark year and the beginning of Blodreina. “I could have refused or said no. Eating…that had to happen. There was no other food to sustain anyone, even though it was immoral. But maybe taking away everyone’s choice could have been avoidable. If they would rather starved, that’d be their choice. They deserved the right to have that choice.”

 

“Taking away the choice killed people, giving a choice would have too. Doesn’t sound like there was any good choice in that situation. If there was, I know someone would have come up with it.”

 

“That wasn’t the worst part anyways.”

 

His hand pauses. “What was?”

 

“Don’t stop,” she tells him, wanting the tattoo to be finished and to not have the process dragged out. “The fighting pits. The clans…weren’t getting along. They were scared. Stealing blankets and food and the council fighting over how to punish the ones who did so. Some wanted to stone them, some wanted different forms of execution, some—Kane mostly—wanted leniency. I gave them that until some members of Skaikru stole the hydro farm and left the rest of Skaikru and every other clan to die. Jaha had a plan to open the doors but the only way he would was if I got the other clans to agree to not slaughter all of Skaikru and trust me to punish the guilty who stole it. ‘You are Wonkru or you are the enemy of Skaikru. Choose.’ That’s what I said as I killed so many warriors who refused to let me deal with it all. The blood of my enemies became my war paint. Later on I started cutting my own arm to use my own blood.”

 

Lincoln sucks in a quiet breath. She could tell he didn’t like this memory but she could also tell he needed to hear it. He needed to know where she was at, what had happened to her to make her a very different girl than the one he knew before.

 

“After that we took a page from ancient Rome. I took a page from it. The fighting pits were born. Anyone who committed a crime was put in the pits where they fought to the death until only one survived. Inspired from ancient Rome, just like the conclaves. Win the fight, save your life and—I, um…” she trails off with a strangled sob.

 

“Take a break,” Lincoln says softly. She startles slightly when she realizes he’s in front of her. Realizes the stinging of the needle is gone. He wipes the tears from her cheek. “Take a break. Tell me the rest later, little at a time. We have time, Oktevia.”

 

“Do we?”

 

“Come here,” he pulls her small frame into his strong arms, holding her close. “I don’t know but I’ll do everything in my power not to leave you again.”

 

****

 

Nia’s Castle, Azgeda

 

“Do this. Do that. I’m not a servant girl. I am a warrior. A Natblida. I deserve more respect than she gives me. Maybe I am not destined to be a Heda, but I know how to run Azgeda better than her. I was born for this,” the teen says to herself as she stalks through the snow on the outskirts of the castle.

 

Ever since Nia woke up with her memories intact she had been hell bent on revenge. Revenge against Lexa for killing her, on Wanheda, on Roan even especially after a guard told her about her son’s alliance with Skaikru and honoring Lexa’s wishes in keeping Skaikru the thirteenth clan and forcing Azgeda to align with them.

 

The same guard had relayed on how Ontari triumphed by killing Lexa’s novitiates in their sleep but had been taken over by ALIE and ultimately dying. Nia had yelled at her and struck her about how weak she was.

 

Nia didn’t understand. She didn’t understand how awful it was, having some thing control her mind and she could see and hear everything but she couldn’t control it. She didn’t want to die but she had volunteered to and couldn’t stop it. She remembers even now how it felt. Part of her hated Skaikru even more for bringing that thing to Polis, the other was at least a little grateful that they had destroyed the woman in the red dress.

 

“Maybe I’ll find Roan. Tell him everything and help him kill her. Maybe I’ll help him reign. He’s never particularly liked me but at least he knows my worth.”

 

“That’s right, I do.”

 

She turns to the voice. He emerges from the tree line. He’s covered, face hidden by a hood because he’s not just banished anymore, he’s wanted, but she knows his voice. “Roan. We have a lot to discuss.”

 

“Yes. Not here.”

 

“Where?”

 

“Come with me.”

 

“I go with you, I’ll have a kill order on me, too.”

 

“Is that so bad? You were just babbling about coming to find me.”

 

“I was not babbling!” she huffs defiantly.

 

“Whatever. Come now or you’re on your own with my mother.”

 

He stalks off and his lips switch slightly when he hears her following him.

Chapter 14: Not Sacred

“She’s a Natblida?” Anya asks slowly, eyes on the little girl standing in front of Clarke, leaning against her legs. “She was a Heda? And now you’re hiding her identity and just hoping no one from this…Wonkru…recognizes and starts something?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Lexa! You know better than this!”

 

“Anya,” she levels her gaze. Anya may have been her mentor and may be close to her, but she couldn’t have her treating her like she was an insolent child when she was Commander of the twelve, to be thirteen, clans. “You know what would happen if the world knew who she was. Knew she’s a past Heda. She’d be sent to Polis. I want the kids already there out of that situation!”

 

“Heda! You don’t mean that!”

 

“I do! They deserve better than to be trained to kill each other. With the plan for Praimfaya, it won’t matter anymore anyways—”

 

“What plan,” Anya asks slowly with a steely look.

 

“It’ll be discussed once we win the fight against the Mountain. One life altering event at a time.”

 

“Leksa,” Anya drops the general tone and looks at her former mentee with a sigh. “What plan?”

 

“It can’t get out there, I shouldn’t have slipped—”

 

“What plan?” Anya asks again, gentler. “You know I won’t speak of it. You know you can trust me.”

 

Lexa and Clarke share a long look before the blonde looks to her with an explanation, speaking a little slower in their language but still fluently. “Natblida. It was created by Bekka Pramheda. She was a scientist from the world before and she fell from the sky after the first Praimfaya. She wasn’t a god who had come to save everyone, she was a woman of science who brought nightblood to fight against radiation.” Anya looks at Lexa with eyes and the Commander nods. “Before Praimfaya, Luna was letting us use her bone marrow—”

 

“Luna? The cowardly Natblida who fled the conclave?”

 

“She wasn’t a coward,” Lexa responds heavily. “She knew she’d win. She didn’t want it, she never wanted it. She knew I would make a better Heda, everyone knew that. She killed Nato and knew if she killed me she’d be Heda so she fled and disappeared with Floukru.”

 

Anya just makes a disgruntled sound and gives Clarke a half-assed wave to continue. “We used Luna’s marrow to test. Things happened after I took her marrow so it was untested. Twelve-hundred people—a hundred per clan—went into the bunker, my friends went to space and I stayed behind because I had to set the satellite manually…” she could see she was losing the warrior. “Praimfaya came, I hid from the death wave, and the radiation made me sick but because I had nightblood I thought I was the only one to survive…until I found Madi.” She looks down at the little girl. “We lived together just the two of us for six years. Everyone came back and something happened that made her take the flame but that’s history. What matters now is keeping her safe.”

 

“Natblida… that’s the plan? For everyone? Avoid the death wave, survive radiation…the sacred blood?”

 

“It’s not actually sacred,” Lexa says slowly, still processing the information herself. But she had seen Becca herself in the flame and even so, she trusted Clarke. “It’s how we all survive, Anya. The only way. From what I was told, the building collapsed onto the hatch in the death wave and there was no other exit. Now we can remove the building before it comes, tear it down little by little. But that doesn’t change the fact that the twelve hundred didn’t make it. According to Oktevia kom Skaikru, by the first year it was half rations. By year three, the crops failed and there was no food and they had to resort to…drastic measures. Even with time to make sure the machines worked properly and create an underground farm, it’s not guaranteed to work. So the plan is to turn as many people as possible into Nightbloods and wait out the wave and early radiation in the bunker and Mount Weather. That’s why we need to take out the Mountain without destroying anything. There’s a lot to go over involving the plan and a lot to work out but we’ll deal with that after the Mountain and Nia.”

 

“Who else knows about this?”

 

“Indra and Linkon, and certain members of Skaikru—Oktevia, Bellomi, Markus, Raven, Murphy, Monty, Harper, Ecko kom Azgeda.”

 

“So if I were to discuss it with Indra…?”

 

“You have every right to, just not near prying ears.”

 

“Of course not, Heda. Never. Thank you for telling me…even if it was because I cornered you.”

 

“I’m sorry it took cornering us for us to tell you.”

 

“You’re right, you’re a good Heda. You must be careful with such plans. It’s my fault for not making you think that I could be trusted easily. Unlike Indra, I spend…too much time away. Too distant ever since you took the throne.”

 

Lexa surprised all four of them, especially herself, when she stepped forward and threw her arms around Anya. The older woman froze for a moment before wrapping her arms around her, holding her close. There had been only one time before when Lexa had hugged her and it was when she was a small child. After her first kill, the child had been in shock. After she had unfrozen, she had launched herself into Anya’s arms and clung to her in tears. Anya had held her for a moment before she let her go, wiping her wetness off her cheeks and told her ste yuj. Anya had spent a long time after that, after they whisked her little mentee away to train until she either died or became the most powerful person, wishing she had held her just a moment longer. She never got that chance again, until now.

 

Clarke took Madi’s hand and led the child from the tent to give the two a moment alone.

 

“Don’t let go,” Lexa breathes into her shoulder. It wasn’t an order, it was a plea. Anya doesn’t answer but she holds her tighter, savoring the moment. She didn’t know when she’d get a chance like this again.

 

****

 

“Are you still mad?” Bellamy asks, trailing a finger down Echo’s tattoo on her arm.

 

“A little,” she admits quietly. She rolls onto her back so she can look at him. “Do you regret it? Like really regret it?”

 

“More than anything. All I wanted was to find my sister and then get back to you,” he admits. “It was a long time on that mountain. Things I don’t know how to explain…”

 

“I turned into a glowing orb with everyone else, had a conversation with higher beings and was sent back to Earth. And then went to sleep on a beach and woke up in a cage a hundred and thirty one years in the past but with all my memories. I think I might be able to understand you.”

 

“You…” he swallows. Clarke told him they all transcended and went back. That he knew. But hearing Echo say it felt different. He wanted Clarke to understand, she was his best friend. But Echo, he needed her understand. “There was a snow storm so bad it nearly killed us. We ran out of food and we had to eat bugs to survive. I kept trying to hike through it regardless. I needed to get to the anomaly to get back. We were in the cave for weeks, months. I lost track of time. We saw…glowing figures. Orbs. My mother. The higher being came in the form of my mother and I believed them and then suddenly the storm stopped and the sky cleared. After that it all blurs together. It was…tunnel vision. I remembering betraying you and sending Clarke and Raven to MCap but I can’t remember the feelings. I remember talking to you and remembering a feeling but not the words said. Sanctum, Clarke shooting me to save Madi. It replays in my head day after day. It never ends.”

 

“Bellamy?”

 

“How can you ever forgive me?”

 

“I already have,” she says gently, reaching up and stroking his cheek. She tilts his chin up, sighing as he evades meeting her eyes. “Bellamy.”

 

“I messed up.”

 

“Like I haven’t?” she raises her eyebrow and the corners of his mouth twitch. “Come here,” she pulls him down into a searing kiss.

 

****

 

“Heda!”

 

Lexa sighs. She glances at Clarke who was sitting beside her, then to Madi who was asleep strewn across Clarke’s lap. She didn’t want to disturb the child so she gets up off the bed. Clarke shoots her a sympathetic look as she makes her way to the entrance, pulling the flap back to reveal Gustus. “What is it?”

 

“Azgeda. Our scouts came back saying they found two Azgeda warriors in Trikru territory, heading here to TonDC.”

 

“Why?”

 

“To speak with you.”

 

“Who are they?”

 

“The…prince of Azgeda.”

 

“Roan. You said two.”

 

“A girl is with him. the scout said her name was Ontari.”

 

“Klark,” Lexa says immediately, turning to her lover. “You’re going to want to get up for this.”

Chapter 15: A Fateful Meeting

“Hey, O?” Clarke walked over to her friend, Madi walking beside her hand in hand. “Do you know where Indra is?”

 

Octavia glances up from where she’s sitting beside Lincoln, sharpening her sword. Lincoln was skinning his kill from earlier.

 

“She went that way with Kane,” she nods in the direction. “Is something wrong?

“Roan’s here…Ontari, too. They requested a meeting with Lexa. She wants Indra there.”

 

“And you too?”

 

“Uh, yeah. Why?”

 

“Madi. She’s not going too, is she?”

 

“I can’t just leave her in the tent.”

 

“You can leave her here. Raven, Bellamy, and Echo are just over there. Murphy, Monty, and Harper are close by. We can keep her safe, I promise. I doubt anyone would bother a little grounder child anyways, even if the kid is associated with the Commander. How about that, Madi? Want to stay with me? Maybe we could even get a kickstart on that training you mentioned wanting.”

 

“Yeah!” Madi beamed. “Please, Clarke? Can I start training with Octavia? I miss training and she needs practice like me.”

 

“Be gentle with her,” Clarke tells Octavia.

 

“More like she should be gentle with me,” Octavia suggests. “Indra’s been kicking my ass and I’m sore all over.”

 

“Don’t break Octavia,” Clarke chuckles to Madi before hugging her. She walks away in the direction Indra was last seen in.

 

Madi sidles up to Octavia, smiling. Her blue eyes flit between her and Lincoln. “Hi,” she says, the slightest hint of shyness in her voice. She was wary, but she knew that Clarke would never leave her with someone unsafe.

 

“Hello,” he answers. He has a softer voice than she expected, Trikru accent shining through. “My name is Lincoln.”

 

“I’m Madi,” she smiles. Lincoln, she knew his story. He was to Octavia that Emori was the Murphy, that Lexa was to Clarke, that Harper was to Monty. He was gentle and strong and fair in the stories. He was the first grounder to help the sky people.

 

“Hello, Madi. You want to be a warrior?” He wonders how old she was before time reversed.

 

“Yeah. I was pretty good before. I trained with the other Wonkru novitiates. I was Octavia’s seken for a little bit. We trained together a few times. Clarke mostly taught me, though. But now by the time I’m twelve again, I’ll have so many badass warriors teaching me. Clarke, Lexa, Octavia, Indra, Lexa even mentioned seeing if Anya would train me—she’s who taught Lexa!”

 

He has a knowing gleam in his eyes, her excitement was infectious. “Come on, skinning this deer can wait.” He gets up and Octavia lets out a hiss of “yes!”

 

****

 

“Madi?” Lexa asks under her breath and she and Clarke approach the tent Roan and Ontari were being watched in.

 

“With Octavia and Lincoln.”

 

“Good,” she breathes. “Roan and especially Ontari cannot know of her existence unless we can trust them. Last thing we need is Nia seeing her as a weakness and trying to capture her.”

 

Clarke swallows hard. “Agreed.”

 

Gustus holds open the flap with a contempt look and the two step into the tent. Roan is immediately lowering his head in greeting, tugging Ontari’s arm. The young Azgeda lets out a grumble before following suit.

 

“Heda,” Roan says in greeting, his face stoic. He glances at Clarke. “Klark. I thought I’d find you both here.”

 

“What is this about?” Lexa asks and looks at Ontari. “Why is she here?”

 

“She’s here to help…I think.”

 

“She killed all of my Natblidas.”

 

“And your Fleimkepa killed you and he’s still at Polis watching over your novitiates, is he not?” Roan sighs. “Look, we all did bad things before but this is like a clean slate, right? I get not trusting her, I don’t fully either. But she wants my mother dead as much as you and she does know the castle well.”

 

“Or maybe she just wants to lead us into a trap,” Indra says disapprovingly, scowl on her face.

 

“Indra’s right,” Anya agrees.

 

“The queen is cruel. She stole me from my parents when I was just a baby and raised me. She’s cruel and cold. Am I? Yes I am because it’s the only way to survive and I won’t apologize for doing what I had to do. But that was then. Right now, I’d rather follow you than Nia. I want her dead. I want to be free of her hold. I hate her.”

 

“And Skaikru? You wanted their extinction before,” Indra growls.

 

“I can hate them without trying to kill them,” she says reluctantly, eyes boring into Clarke. Lexa levels her own glare, giving the girl a steely look until she looks away.

 

“I can live with that,” Clarke says finally.

 

“I’d be more comfortable if a guard stayed with you when you move around freely. You understand.”

 

“Of course,” Roan says quickly. Guards eyes on them beat being a prisoner. He made a noise, raising an eyebrow at Ontari.

 

“Of course,” Ontari grunts out through her teeth. Roan knew she’d take work. A lot of work.

 

“So what do we propose we do about your mother? Do you have a plan?”

 

“I have information,” Ontari offers reluctantly. “Queen Nia plans on meeting with the mountain. Like before. A man there sent her a message—he would send a messenger of proof of good faith and a time and place.”

 

“Wonder how she’ll feel when her messenger never shows up,” Lexa muses, exchanging a look with Clarke, Indra and Anya.

 

“What does that mean?” Roan questions, brows furrowing. “Did you kill the messenger?”

 

“Of course not,” Lexa scoffs. “I am only telling you this because you will be watched every second of every day and every night. The messenger was a former Azgeda spy who is no longer loyal to Azgeda. They’re loyal to us. They came to us on their own free will.”

 

“Echo,” Ontari says quickly. “Echo’s here?”

 

“Of course she’s not loyal,” Roan scoffs. “Getting banished and perishing in Praimfaya made her bitter.”

 

Ontari scowls at him. Echo she liked, Echo she had maybe even loved once, when the older girl was an orphaned working girl named Ash who would hide sweets under her pillow and sneak her food and mend her clothes when she’d accidentally torn them as she ran around when she shouldn’t have been. The older girl had soothed many bruises and cuts that came from an angry Nia, had always made sure she was alright and sometimes snuck into her room at night during the guard change to tell her elaborate stories. Then the real Echo died, and Ash replaced her. And she visited her less and less as Nia gave the girl more and more missions and soon her presence in Ontari’s life was non-existent, and the children they once were was gone, as if they never even existed in the first place.

 

“She didn’t,” Clarke says.

 

“Didn’t what?” Roan asks.

 

“Didn’t perish.”

 

“I banished her.”

 

“From the bunker. She was never in the bunker.”

 

“I—how—” he sputtered, confused. “There was nowhere else.”

 

“On Earth,” Clarke shrugged. “Maybe I should start from the beginning. Octavia won the conclave and instead of Skaikru taking the bunker, she allowed a hundred people from each clan to live in the bunker. Skaikru were drawing names from a bowl or something to determine who would stay. Emori wasn’t even Skaikru so she wouldn’t be in it and Murphy wouldn’t live without her, Monty and Harper were on their way from the opposite direction. Raven was at the island, and they needed her. Me, Bellamy, Murphy and Emori headed to the island to get Raven but we were stopped on the way, attacked by grounders who wanted our suits. Echo saved us. Monty and Harper came to the rescue but by that point, there was no time to get there and back and I was sick anyways so there was no just going back from there. We knew there was an option—the Ark. Someone had to stay and manually override a satellite to the Ark for the rocket, it was me. I wasn’t able to do that and get back before the death wave. But they went to space. Bellamy brought her.”

 

“Bellamy…the same Bellamy I found with his hands around her neck during the conclave?”

 

“Yes. I wondered if one of them would lose it on each other, if both would comes down alive. I was not prepared for them to come down together.”

 

“Together, they all didn’t come down?”

 

“They all did. They were a couple. Like, in love together.”

 

Roan was speechless, staring at Clarke like a frozen deer. And all Clarke could do as crack a smile. She made a mental note to find the couple after that and to give them warning, about it all.

 

****

 

“Argh!”

 

Madi brought her knee to Octavia’s shin and rolled her eyes when the teen dropped. “I didn’t kick you that hard. You don’t have to pretend to get taken down.”

 

“Mm. Artigas kicked me there in sparring yesterday, I’m not faking,” Octavia groans. Lincoln bit a smirk, nodding when Madi looked at him for confirmation.

 

“Sorry. Clarke said not to break you.”

 

“You didn’t. Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim. It’s good practice anyways.”

 

“For when you have kids?” Octavia’s green eyes widened and she whipped her head around to look at Lincoln before looking back at the little girl in shock. “What? You don’t to be a mom. Clarke’s like my mom. My real mom is alive again, but Clarke’s also like my mom. And she’s your age and your friend. Why is she the only one of all of you with a kid?”

 

“She’s—I—um…I, uh…we haven’t—you shouldn’t—we…”

 

“Didn’t I tell you not to break Octavia?” Clarke asks when she appears behind the little group.

 

“I’m not sure how I broke her,” Madi says in confusion. “All I did was ask if she needs practice for when she has kids.”

 

“Oh,” Clarke looks at her with wide eyes. “I get why she’s broken.”

 

“Why?”

 

Clarke takes her hand. “I’ll explain one day. Not today. My brain’s too tired.”

 

“My body’s too tired.”

 

Octavia watches as the duo walk away. Lincoln steps over to her, wrapping an arm around her. “That was quite a reaction.” He switches back to Trigedasleng which snaps her back into focus.

 

“I was not expecting that from a six year old. Even though she has the brain of a thirteen year old.”

 

“After Praimfaya?”

 

“After Praimfaya.”

Notes:

Thank you for everyone's patience as I take a bit longer between chapters as I still adjust to my new job. I appreciate it! And I appreciate all of you :)

Chapter 16: How Was Space?

Notes:

First and foremost, thank you all for your patience as I worked on writing this! My job is going well but I'm always so tired because I'm physically moving, carrying things, pushing or pulling this almost the whole time (horses are not easy to take care of lol) I appreciate all of you!

Secondly, READ THIS, I *attempted* a smut scene. I am terrible at it. Yet I attempt at leats one scene every fic for some reason. If you don't like reading smut, you can go about 1/4 down the fic and find the first **** and start there.

“Indra wants to call a meeting discussing—”

 

“Forty minutes.”

 

“Klark—”

 

“Gustus has orders not to allow you to be disturbed for the next hour. Forty minutes is all I need.” She turns her attention to kissing her lover’s neck, fingers undoing her shirt easily. She gets it over her head, undoing her bindings.

 

“Klark,” she breathes, feeling her warm breath on her chest. Part of her wants to demand Clarke be as equally bare as her, but the other part can’t find the words. When she feels Clarke’s mouth on her breast all her cares are gone and she starts to come undone. Clarke kneads at her other breast making the Commander’s head to fall back with a moan, fingers raking up her back, tangling in Clarke’s hair, anything to ground. After Clarke is satisfied with her work, she abandons her breasts and kisses her way down Lexa’s toned abdomen. She feels her shivers under her warm breath and she smirks. Lexa never let weakness or emotions show, but in the privacy of their tent, or the room in Polis long ago, she enjoyed seeing her melt, seeing her just let go. Lexa never let weakness or emotions show, but in the privacy of their tent, or the room back in Polis long ago, she enjoyed seeing her melt, seeing her just let go.

 

“Why are all your clothes always so complicated?” She complains halfheartedly, working on getting her pants off. She got no reply, not that she expected one. She got her pants off, tossing them in the heap of her other garments.

 

Clarke settled down between her lover’s legs and wasted no time. She had wanted to savor the moment, to bask in the love she was still in awe about being real, but she couldn’t wait any longer. She feels Lexa shudder under her hands in anticipation as she feels Clarke’s hot breath against her center and she dives right in, tongue gliding through her folds. Lexa’s head falls back against the furs, a jolt of electricity running through her. She presses her palm against her mouth to mask the moans that escaped. She briefly thinks she can’t wait until the return to Polis, where they’d have nothing but time and she wouldn’t have to quiet herself. Clarke’s tongue may be magic she thinks as she starts coming undone. It had been forever it felt like. Just a couple hundred year from Clarke’s timeline, she thinks in the brief moment she has of being coherent. She isn’t thinking coherently for long, breathless curses slipping past her tongue, muffled by her palm. She writhes when Clarke adds her fingers, overwhelming her in the best way possible.

 

“Kl-Klark,” she stutters her name out, followed by a babble of Trigedasleng. It isn’t long before she comes fully undone, finding her release.

 

“Worth it?” Clarke asks with a soft smirk as she climbs back up beside her, hand resting on her heaving chest.

 

Lexa nods jerkily, taking a moment for her breathing to even. “There’s no time for you.”

 

“Tonight,” Clarke assures her, pressing a kiss to her lips to silence a rebuttal. Lexa nods against her, kissing her back hungrily. And they stay that way until Gustus gives them their ten minute warning.

 

****

 

“I shouldn’t go.”

 

Echo was rarely ever nervous. Bellamy could count the amount of times he saw the warrior nervous, and every time she wore the mask well and he could barely tell. This time, she was visibly nervous which confused him. that, and she slipped into Trig for normal talk, which was her telltale nervous sign—unless they needed to speak her common tongue with danger nearby she spoke English with him since it was what most of Spacekru was more comfortable with. They all knew Trig, but they had only spoken it for a few short years while Echo spent most of her life speaking both languages.

 

“Lex—Heda asked for you to be there. Ontari all but demanded it is what Klark said. She wants someone she can trust.”

 

“Roan will be there. He wants me dead. He banished me to die, I should have died in Praimfaya but I didn’t.”

 

“You were important to him long before that. One of his most trusted people. If he hadn’t died, he’d have likely regretted it.”

 

“But he didn’t, Bellamy.”

 

“Look. You’re safe here. Azgeda has no hold on you, you’re Spacekru even though we hopefully won’t go to the ring this time. Anyways, right now you, him and Ontari are all Azgeda—or former Azgeda—who turned on your Queen. You need each other regardless. And I’d bet you could take him so don’t worry. But I got your back just in case. So does my sister, Klark, Raven, Murphy, Monty, Harper. Indra, Gaia and Miller too. And if you have Klark on your side, you got Heda on your side. We’re all family, right? I’d bet that Roan will want to get in on this family business once he sees how awesome it is.”

 

“Right,” she chuckles, already relaxing. Her grip on his hand loosens and he takes a breath of relief to have feeling in his fingers again. Echo rarely let anything bother her, but for some reason she always cared what Roan thought of it, like his mother before him.

 

“Forget Roan, if we walk in late we’ll be the center of everyone’s attention,” he reminds her. “So come on.”

 

The two walked to the tent they were meeting in. Echo let his hand go as they approached, straightening up as she slipped her mask on. She entered the tent first, Bellamy on her heels. She stopped when she saw how empty it was. Anya was there looking unimpressed as Raven was launched into some defensive story. Echo’s lips twitch at that. She noticed Roan and Ontari were over the other side, Roan looking like he was giving her a pep talk about behaving herself. She drew a deep breath and headed over to Raven.

 

“Finally! Echo, Bellamy, help me out here!” Echo sees Roan’s head snap in their direction from the corner of her eyes. “Eligius.”

 

“What about it?” Bellamy asks with a grimace.

 

“Tell her it was real. That they had state of the ark tech and could fly all over unlike a rocket and about cryo. She doesn’t believe me.”

 

“It was real,” Echo’s grimace matches Bellamy’s. “We were all in cryo.”

 

“She said cryo froze people. You cannot survive being frozen. And not for hundreds of years.”

 

“It…preserved the bodies in a sleep like state,” Bellamy tries to explain. “And it was just over a hundred, not hundreds. Raven explains it better though.”

 

“Raven talks too much, too fast,” Anya says in a disapproving voice. “I don’t understand most of what she says.”

 

“I know the feeling,” Echo chuckles which makes the other warrior crack a smile.

 

“Hey, I’m right here!”

 

“I think you confused everyone but Monty when we were planning to go up to the ring,” Bellamy laughs. “You sure as hell confused me.”

 

“I had never been more confused,” Echo admits, “and I’ve yet to be more confused than that.”

 

“Okay, I get it. I speak mechanic and thanks to Sinclair, Wick and Monty, a little bit Engineer, too often. I’ll try to dumb it down for you people.”

 

“Is that an insult?” Anya asks in offense.

 

“No. that’s Raven being Raven,” Bellamy assures her.

 

“Hi.”

 

Raven spins around and almost falls when the greeting sounds right in her ear. She stumbles back right into Bellamy. “Holy shit. Hi. That was sneaky. Holy crap my heart.”

 

“At least she said hello with her voice and not a knife,” is what Roan says when he approaches. Ontari gives him a sour look that doesn’t phase him. There’s an awkward moment between the group before he blurts out, “how was space.”

 

Echo and Bellamy share a look before Echo responds, “dark.”

 

“Like mother’s castle?”

 

“Darker. No sun in the windows. Cold, too. But the people were nice.”

 

“Sometimes,” Bellamy butts in. “Sometimes people were nice.”

 

“True, true,” Raven says.

 

“What’d you eat? How’d you get air?” Ontari asks suddenly, curiosity piqued.

 

“Algae,” Echo wrinkles her nose.

 

“Gross,” the teen says with a disgusted face.

 

“As for air,” Raven starts, “air filters took the air and reused it over and over. And you think the algae is gross, imagine how we got out drinking water.”

 

“I don’t want to know.”

 

“I pretended I didn’t know,” Bellamy says, shaking his head.

 

“I think we all did,” Echo admits.

 

The conversation is halted by Indra entering the tent with the others who were necessary for the meeting, including Octavia who immediately made her way over to her brother. Anya left the group, rubbing her temples. She went over to Indra. Clarke and Lexa finally appeared, Gustus on their heels.

 

Roan leaned over and whispered before the meeting started, “can we talk after?”

 

Echo took a moment before she nodded with a quiet, “okay.”

Notes:

As I mentioned, I appreciate my readers. I write this for you guys as much as for me. So if anyone ever has any suggestions of things they'd like to see in future chapters or how they'd like things done, you can always comment it! I can't always do everyything everyone wants but I will always read and take every suggestion into real consideration.

Chapter 17: Don't Want to Wait

Notes:

I am (hopefully temporality) out of work due to an injury. Whether I can return this week or not depends on a doctor's appointment tomorrow.
Anyways, I was able to produce a chapter for all three fics this weekend, so it was time off well spent! I had quite a few requests for more Anya/Clarke scene and Clarke training, so I hope your guys enjoy the beginning of that storyline this chapter!

“Everyone is ready for tonight?” Raven asks the group, barely looking up as she fiddled with the radio.

 

“Yes,” Anya is who answers. “The area by the lake has been completely cleared, reinforced best we could by the cliff, area in the woods are cleared, the valley where your ship will land has been cleared and we have warriors stationed in Azgeda on official Coalition orders. Nia can do nothing about it.”

 

“Good. Abby said that things were going according to plans. Mount Weather won’t be able to jam the signal this time. The Exodus is on its way down as we speak, coordinates are locked on. The rest of the Ark follows tonight.”

 

“We have a group of volunteers ready to greet the ship when it lands,” Lexa says. “Your people, they know we all have an understanding?”

 

“They do. Abby and Jaha said everyone knows. Only those they trust fully will have weapons upon landing.”

 

“Good.” She smiles at Clarke. “You’ll see your mom tonight.”

 

Clarke nods with a relieved laugh. “I can’t wait. I miss her. And once they’re here, we can finally make plans for Mount Weather and Nia.”

 

“Thanks to Echo, Roan and Ontari we have enough information to stop her if it comes to a battle.”

 

“It feels good, you know,” Clarke looks at everyone around her. “It feels good to be able to do everything again, the right way this time. No needless deaths, no irradiating Mount Weather if we can help it, saving all the innocent people in there.”

 

“Together this time,” Lexa nods. Mount Weather was her biggest regret and she would do better this time. They all would.

 

“Well, if the meeting is over, we got a training session to get to,” Anya grumbles. She trudges out of the tent.

 

“Good luck.” Lexa fights a smile as Clarke makes a face at her before following the warrior out.

 

Clarke followed Anya quite a bit of ways away from the center of the village. Clarke thinks that if she were anyone else, she’d get her ass kicked left and right in the middle of the village for everyone to see. But she was Lexa’s, and Anya either wanted to hide the fact that the former Wanheda couldn’t fight or that the great Heda was with someone so weak, or that she was planning on actually going easy on the Commander’s girlfriend and didn’t want anyone to know. When Clarke thought about it, she realized in horror it was probably the latter.

 

“Hey, Anya?”

 

The warrior made a noise at her, telling her she heard her. It was pretty clear this wasn’t exactly what she wanted.

 

She switches to Trigedasleng, an olive branch to a begrudging Anya. “Don’t go easy on me because I’m Skaikru or because of Lexa, okay? Treat me like you’d treat anyone else you train. I can handle it.”

 

“If I don’t go easy on you, I promise you will return to your tent covered in bruises.”

 

“And then the next session I’ll remember those bruises and I’ll remember how I got them. I’ll fight smarter than I did the last time. Look, Lexa asked you to train me because I asked for you. Indra could have, we know each other well. But you trained Lexa. You’re the best according to her. And you didn’t know what I was capable of once upon a time. So I’m asking you because I trust you to push me and treat me like any of the others you train. Out here, I’m not the former great Wanheda, the former leader of Skaikru or Lexa’s lover. I’m just your student.”

 

Anya watches her for a moment before nodding slowly. This was not what she expected when Lexa had asked her to train her lover. She had expected weakness and whining or just straight up stubbornness of a girl who didn’t want to train. She thought it’d be like training a child, but here she was asking to be trained the hard and proper way. She was gaining more respect for the sky girl. She shouldn’t have been surprised—one of her foggy final memories was a fight outside their crisped ship, Clarke besting her, thought Anya was pretty injured at the time. But the point was, the sky girl didn’t give up ad showed strength and promise.

 

“You don’t want to be a burden.” It’s not a question, she could read the girl.

 

“I don’t. I don’t want Lexa being afraid and trying to protect me every time something happens. I’d never forgive myself if she died trying to protect me.”

 

“She’ll always worry.”

 

“But she’ll worry less if she knows I can defend myself.” Anya nods at that. “And Madi. She used to be a fierce little fighter but now she’s so little. I need to be able to protect her.”

 

“Alright,” she nods. “I don’t want t send you to Lexa covered in bruises today. Today, we will work on how you stand and move your body, and how to build your strength and muscle because you have none. Then later we will ride, you must perfect riding in case it ever comes to a battle between clans.”

 

“Okay,” Clarke nods with a determined smile. “Let’s do it.”

 

****

 

“Try and keep up!”

 

Octavia had shouted those words right before letting Helios move out into a fast paced gallop. The athletic chestnut would always move faster and easier than Lincoln’s bigger, bulkier Friesian, Badan. The little Quarter Horse showed no sign of slowing, his endurance as strong as his speed.

 

Octavia remembered finding books they had retrieved from Mount Weather in the old life. during her boredom she had found a horse encyclopedia and had pawed through it until she had found what appeared to be Helios. He had it all—a common color, the head shape, the back, the muscular hind the breed was known for. The temperament. She had read that they got their name from being one of the fastest breeds over a quarter mile. That Quarter Horses once had been a race horse, but before the world fell they were best known as ranch horses.

 

She looked behind her, hearing Badan's hoof beats falling further behind her. She slows down and lets them catch up.

 

“We're supposed to be making sure nobody is at the drop site,” he reminds her.

 

“We are,” she chuckles. “Just having fun while doing it. And so far not a sign of anyone. Want to go separate ways around the valley or together?”

 

“Separate is faster but I’m not leaving you with Azgeda still lurking out here.”

 

“Together it is,” she says with a smile. She reaches out and he takes her hand, the horses walking steadily side by side. She switches the Trig, speaking softly and unsure. “Do you still want a family? After the war? After Praimfaya?”

 

“I think the bigger question is, do you?” He watches her, sees the uncertainty painted on her face.

 

“After all I’ve seen, it’s hard to think if bringing a child into this world. Growing up, I accepted the fact I’d never have a family. But then I met you and it seemed real. And then I lost you. But then there was Hope, and all I wanted was one of my own. But Hope was enough, then. Now…is it even possible Lincoln? Would it be safe for a child? Fair to do that? To take myself out of the equation if there’s a threat?”

 

“Is it fair for you to choose to not do something because you think others would be unhappy you aren’t willing to sacrifice yourself because you’re a mother? I don’t think it’d ever be safe. But that never stops anyone, now does it?”

 

“No. It doesn’t. My mom chose to have me, knowing she’d have to hide me forever and if she was ever caught, she’d be executed. Her love for me was more important than her safety. Bellamy chose it too. He chose not to say anything. At first it was because he was scared of his mom dying, but he said somewhere along the way it was less of losing mom and more about protecting me. I felt that with Hope. The urge to do anything to keep her safe. I miss that feeling.”

 

“We can do whatever we want, Octavia. As soon or as far away as we want. Our people have alliances, Heda is with Skaikru. We can be together with nothing stopping us this time.”

 

“What if I don’t want to wait?”

 

“Because you’re scared of losing me?”

 

“No…yes. Not just that, though. If we wait for things to be okay, we’ll never stop waiting.”

 

“I think we have a lot of things to discuss…after we make sure nobody’s wandered into the drop site.”

 

“I’ll race you around the perimeter.”

 

“You always win—hey!” He shakes his head and clucks, encouraging Badan to run after the red blur ahead of him. “This woman.”

 

***

“Is that them?” Madi asks, pointing to the ship breaking through the atmosphere.

“That’s the Exodus ship,” Clarke answers with a smile. “My mom’s on it. And then in a few hours the Ark itself will follow.”

Lexa approached them. “Klark? We’re ready to head out to meet the ship when it lands.” 

“Can I go?” Madi asks with wide eyes.

“No. Oktevia offered to watch you while we go. It’s just safer, Madi. According to Oktevia, the Skaikru part of Wonkru was arguably the most unpredictable. We need to keep you away from them until we know where they all stand.”  

“And Oktevia. She won’t be any safer than me. Less safe,” Madi says tensely.

“Which is why Indra is going to stay near her for now,” Lexa tells the little one. “And Linkon. Even Kane wants everyone safe. And Anya and Gustus are filled in. These are just precautions, Madi.” 

“Okay,” she sighs. She wraps her arms around Clarke tightly. “Be safe,” she mumbles against her. She lets her go and thinks for a moment before throwing her arms around Lexa. “You too. Take care of each other.”

Lexa kneels down to Madi’s level, putting her hands on her little shoulders and looks her in the eye. “Madi, I promise I will keep Clarke safe and I’ll do my best to stay safe myself. We have some of the best warriors coming with us. And Kane, Raven and Bellamy because Skaikru trusts them. We’re going to bring them here until the Ark lands and everyone is reunited. You’re not just worried about us, are you? You’re worried about here, too?”

Madi nods slowly. “I heard them say Azgeda was seen. Maybe the bad ones.”

“Indra is staying here, as well as plenty of great warriors. We’re only taking some of the warriors with us. The rest of the best warriors are here. Alright?” Madi nods again. “Here.” Lexa takes a sheath off of her belt and holds it up to Madi, showing her the blade inside. “Do you know what this is?” 

“You had it the day you met Clarke the first time.”

“Anya gave this to me when I was not much older than you. I was scared to go to Polis and train away from home. She told me this would keep me safe if I was ever in trouble. I don’t need it anymore. It’s yours now—it’ll keep you safe.”

Madi clips it to her belt before throwing her arms around Lexa’s neck. “Thank you.” She lets the Commander go and looks at Clarke with a watery smile, unable to go to her again or else she’d cry, before running over to a waiting Octavia. She jumps up and Octavia catches her and she perches on the teen’s hip. Usually she wasn’t big on being treated like a little one, not when she remembered being a teen. But right now she needed that comfort.

“You’re so good with her,” Clarke says softly as she and Lexa approached their waiting steeds. “She loves you.”

“Because of you.”  

“No. Because of you. I’m glad she loves you. All I ever wanted was to have the two of you, together.” 

“Now you do. Always.” She gives Clarke’s hand a comforting squeeze. Clarke steps closer and presses a kiss to her lips before the two mounted their horses, beginning their ride to the valley.

Chapter 18: Identities

Notes:

I'm not sure what this chapter is. Definitely unplanned. A case of kinda zoning out and typing faster than my brain can process and the chapter writing itself. This is why I should not write while in pain, no sleep and no caffeine lmao

“Mom!”

 

Clarke didn’t slow

Clarke barely slowed down right before she crashed into her mother, wrapping her arms around her tightly. Abby held onto her daughter tightly, pressing a kiss to her head. It takes her a long moment to let her go. Clarke sidesteps to let Abby pull Raven into a crushing hug. Clarke looks around with a smile. She sees Kane greeting others, sees Miller and Jackson embracing each other. Her smile drops when she sees David Miller leading a cuffed Diana Sydney from the exodus ship. She wonders what happened there. She can’t dwell on it much longer when her thoughts are interrupted by “Sinclair!” and Raven running into his arms. Her smile returns.

 

“Commander,” she hears her mother’s greeting. It’s formal but the stiffness from the world before is gone. I loved her, mom.

 

“Abby,” Lexa dips her head at the older woman. “Or do you prefer Dr. Griffin?”

 

Abby’s eyes widen a little at the leader asking her what her preference was. “It doesn’t really matter. I’m called both, Commander.” She looks at Clarke. “All the kids?”

 

“All doing great,” Clarke smiles. “Indra set them all up well at the dropship. They’re checked on every day. Finn and Wells have learned to track so well, they’ll be great assets when Arkadia is set up again. I was told Atom, Mbege, Murphy and Bellamy have been doing very well with their hunting. Monty has been taking full advantage of the farming opportunities. Echo, Roan and Ontari are at TonDC.”

 

“Ontari?”

 

“She’s not as bad as I thought she’d be. She likes sneaking up on people. And she has an odd budding friendship with Octavia much to Indra’s dismay. She thoroughly likes sneaking up on Raven. Raven isn’t overly threatening and swears too much for one person which is probably why she sneaks up on her. Oh, and Madi can’t wait to see you.”

 

“You have Madi?” Abby’s eyes lit up at the mention of her granddaughter.

 

“Yeah. She’s back at TonDC, O’s watching her.”

 

The happy look drops. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

 

“Of course it is. She’s one of my best friends, Mom. She more than redeemed herself before we were sent back in time. And as the story goes, you were just as responsible as she was for Blodreina. Eat or die—it was your idea.”

 

“It was my idea, I’ll admit that. But she took it too far. She continued it even after the Dark Year.”

 

“Mom. She was seventeen when she won the conclave. She wasn’t a leader, it was tossed onto her. And of course she took it too far! You let her carry that burden and left her to sink and then expected her to make it out without a lifeline.”

 

Abby doesn’t speak but nods, looking down in shame. She knew her daughter was right.

 

“We should get them to where the camp will be for their grand reunion,” Lexa tells Clarke softly. Clarke nods in agreeance, she could continue the conversation with her mother later.

 

****

 

“I am not afraid.”

 

“That’s right. You’re a brave little one.”

 

“I am. It’s only been a few hours but I miss Clarke…and Lexa.”

 

“I know. I miss my family whenever they go out, too.”

 

“I’m your family, too. Right?”

 

“Of course you are, Madi.”

 

Madi sheathes the knife Lexa gave her so she can throw her arms around Octavia’s neck. The young child in her craved the closeness and love as much as the teen in her craved independence and validation. She lets her go, little face frowning. “I’m hungry.”

 

“Good thing I brought food over here, then,” a voice says and Madi looks up with a smile.

 

“Mochof, Echo!” Madi reaches for the plate.

 

Echo puts the tray with the rest of the food down on a stump before perching on the log Octavia was sitting on. “Bellamy is pacing around the perimeter. He’s taking guard duty very seriously.”

 

“Of course he is,” Octavia huffs with the shake of her head. “He’s always been so protective. Is Lincoln with him?”

 

“He was. Murphy ate quickly and relieved Lincoln so he could eat. He was going over to Nyko last I saw him. I can keep an eye on her if you want to go find him?”

 

“Do you mind, Madi?” she asks the little girl.

 

Madi shakes her head. “Echo keeps me safe. She got me from Lowada Kliron to the rover then to rescue you and then to the gorge last time, remember?”

 

“I remember,” she smiles tensely, trying to ignore the memory. “I’ll be back soon, okay?”

 

“Okay. We’ll be fine,” she smiles at the other warrior. When Octavia is gone, with her plate of food, Madi looks at Echo all business-like. “I’d like you to train me.”

 

Echo pauses mid-bite, brow furrowing. “Don’t you already have like, five people training you?”

 

Madi shrugs. “They’re mostly Trikru. Different clans fight differently. Different people do. Anya trains me different than Octavia does. And they both train different than Lexa. And they all train different than Harper. And I know you fight different so you can train me your way, too. I want to be a good fighter.”

 

“I’m not training you until I ask Clarke. I don’t need her wrath.”

 

“She won’t care. She likes you!”

 

“Who likes who?”

 

Echo spins to face the person behind her, momentarily startled. She growls lightly at the intruder. “We need to put a bell on you.” The words were Bellamy’s, spoken after one of the many times she startled him on the ring. He was only half joking when he said that—she almost thought he would ask Raven or Monty to build some signaling device for her or something for when she wandered around like a ghost.

 

“A bell?” Ontari asks in confusion. She hesitates before sitting in Octavia’s previous spot. Madi scoots closer to Echo instinctively, eying the teen she had met a few times. Nobody ever let her near the older girl and she didn’t bother asking why—she just accepted that she was capable of something bad.

 

“Cats,” Echo shrugs. “That’s what Bellamy says.”

 

“Cats,” comes a snort as the prince as he plops down across from them. Madi jumps at the new intrusion and ends up clambering up onto Echo’s lap. She eyes the two newcomers warily. Roan eyes her right back. “That’s the kid that’s always chasing Klark around.” Echo gives one brisk nod. “Why do you have her?”

 

“I’m watching her.” Roan can’t understand why she’s so stiff with him all of the sudden—he thought they two of them had buried the hatchet.

 

“You’re like her guard?”

 

“She’s my family!” Madi blurts out, glaring at the Prince. “She’s keeping me safe as my family, not as a guard. Little kids need to be kept safe,” she grumbles, not thrilled with the little kid part.

 

“You weren’t so little before…this, were you?”

 

“I was thirteen. Now I’m five. I don’t like it,” she folds her arm and Echo holds back a comment about how adorable angry little Madi was. “You’re the Prince of Azgeda, right?”

 

“Yeah. Prince Roan, but you can just call me Roan.”

 

“Roan,” she tests the name on her tongue. “And you are?”

 

“Ontari.”

 

“I’m Madi.”

 

“Kom Lowada Kliron Kru,” Ontari finishes for her and Madi’s, and Echo’s, eyes widen.

 

“How did you…?”

 

“People talk. I listen. Word is you were Heda in the last life. The ‘true’ successor of Leksa kom Trikru. Word was your Nightblood was created in a lab, taken from Klark kom Skaikru and put into you before Praimfaya. False blood or not, you still had it, and that was good enough to stick the flame into your head. But I think you were born with it, right? That’s why everyone’s so careful with you. That’s why you need to be guarded.”

 

“Ontari!” Echo hisses, panic seizing in her chest. She wasn’t sure what to do, but she was regretting letting her former family anywhere near the child. She reminds herself that Octavia would have too—she had some weird budding friendship with the Azgeda teen.

 

“I won’t say anything.” Ontari puts her hands up in defense.

 

“If you do, Heda will have your head,” Echo threatens.

 

“Funny, I thought that was Nia’s go-to.”

 

“This isn’t funny,” Roan growls at the girl. “People already don’t trust you. Anyone catches wind that you’re accusing the Commander of harboring a secret Natblida child and you’ll start a war right in this camp. And Heda’s allies just came down with a lot of guns.”

 

“When they return, you’re telling Klark and Heda you know about Madi. You’ll tell them where you heard it and swear to them that you won’t repeat it. They can decide where to go from there,” Roan orders causing the teen’s eyes to widen.

 

“Are you kidding me?! After what happened last time with Natblida kids? They’d kill me right then and there!”

 

“Maybe if you hadn’t beheaded all of Heda’s novitiates you wouldn’t have to worry!”

 

“Roan! I’ll talk to them. She’s right. You haven’t seen the lengths Klark would go to protect Madi. She left Bellamy for dead—twice—in an attempt to protect her even though she didn’t need it. I’ll talk to Octavia, then we’ll decide how to approach Heda. Don’t go around saying anything to anyone, got it? You too, Roan.”

 

“You don’t tell me what to do,” Roan tells her. “I’m your prince.”

 

“No. You’re Azgeda’s prince. I’m not Azgeda.”

 

“The banishment was a long time ago.”

 

“Banishment or not—I’m Spacekru. Even if we don’t go to the ring in this time. I’ll always be Spacekru.”

 

“Echo.”

 

“Roan.”

 

“Guys? What’s going on?”

 

Echo looks at Octavia who reappeared and takes a deep breath. “We have a bit of a situation here.”

 

“What kind of situation?” she asks slowly, wearily.

 

“Ontari knows who Madi is…and what she used to be.”

 

“Oh, crap.”

Chapter 19: The Pillars of The Commander

“What’s wrong?” was the first thing Clarke asks upon seeing the looks on Octavia and Echo’s faces after the former pulled her into a tent. “Wait, where’s Madi?!”

 

“Madi’s okay. She’s with Monty and Harper. She was trying to convince Harper to train her Ark Guard style.”

 

“Then what’s wrong?”

 

“Ontari knows who Madi was last time and that she’s a Natblida,” Echo says before she can stop herself. “Others in this village were talking about it and she overheard.”

 

“Who were? Who’s been carelessly walking around saying that Madi is a Natblida and that she was Heda? If Ontari heard, then who else could have? Were they members of Wonkru? Have they outright told anyone?!”

 

“Clarke! I don’t know. All I know is what Ontari told us. She said she didn’t tell anyone else.”

 

Clarke looks to Echo. “Would she have told anyone else?”

 

Echo shakes her head. “The only people she talks to is me, Roan and Octavia…Roan was with us and knows too. He pretty much threatened Ontari if she ever spoke of it again.”

 

“Well I hope she’s ready to be threatened again. Where is she?”

 

“I’ll bring you.”

 

Clarke follows her friends out of the tent. She stops when she hears someone calling her name. “Over here!”

 

Lexa made her way over, looking tired from all the chaos that had been happening the last few days. It was far from over with the Ark itself coming down shorty, dealing with Azgeda and the Mountain Men, and in a years’ time, Praimfaya. “What’s wrong?” Green eyes search tired blue.

 

“Ontari knows that Madi is a Natblida. And that she was Heda before we came back.”

 

“What?” Lexa growls.

 

“She heard others talking about it.”

 

“Who?!”

 

“That’s what I’m about to find out. Come on.” She takes her hand, not worrying about looks in the cover in the night. They four of them made their way over to the fire where Ontari and Roan were still sitting. The teen looked at them, at Clarke and Heda, and visibly gulped. Very few things ever scared Ontari. But being at the wrath of the Commander and her very overprotective lover was enough to turn the girl’s blood cold. “Who did you hear?” Clarke demands the moment they’re in front of the Azgeda Natblida and prince.

 

“Guards,” Ontari shrugged. “They were standing guard at the doors of the meeting room. They didn’t notice me. One of them was insisting that the kid you have was a true Natblida, the other argued that she was turned into one when Praimfaya came.”

 

“Dieran and Jorum,” Lexa says instantly.

 

“One told the other they’d prove it,” Ontari finishes, shifting from one foot to the other.

 

“When was this?” Lexa snaps.

 

“Today. I came over to them,” she nods her head at Echo and Octavia, “not long after.”

 

“I’ll find Madi,” Octavia tells them, “make sure she’s safe and that Monty and Harper know what’s up.”

 

“Thank you,” Clarke tells her friend before she runs off.

 

Lexa steps closer to Ontari. “If you ever repeat what you heard to anyone else…”

 

“You’ll have my head?”

 

“You’ll wish your death would be that quick.”

 

“Understood.”

 

“And if you think you were being watched before…”

 

“Also understood,” the teen sighs deeply.

 

“Good.” The couple walked away in the direction Octavia had run off to.

 

“You’re lucky that they’re so focused on who you heard to focus on wanting to slit your throat,” Echo tells the younger girl. “You seriously better keep it all to yourself Ontari. Seriously. They won’t hesitate to kill you. If you speak of this, it won’t be you knowing about a kid that seals your fate, it’ll be defying a direct order from Heda herself.”

 

“I’m not an idiot! I won’t say anything.”

 

“You better not,” Roan adds, “I brought you here. You do anything, you screw it up for all of us.”

 

“For you two,” Echo reminds him. “Not me. I’m not one of you. Not anymore.”

 

She walks away, ignoring Roan calling her name. She thinks of her childhood, after she replaced the real Echo. A childhood with Roan like an older brother, a little Ontari. Her memories were painful, but there were some moments she’d never take back. But she thinks of her family from the sky, a family that would have never been if unlikely circumstances hadn’t aligned. If Roan hadn’t banished her, if she hadn’t sulked outside of the bunker, if Raven hadn’t been left on the island, if she hadn’t overheard Murphy and Emori talk about the lighthouse bunker, if she hadn’t saved them, if Monty and Harper hadn’t come, if they didn’t get the oxygenator, if Clarke hadn’t stayed behind, if they were just a minute later than they had been…if any of those things hadn’t happened, then she wouldn’t have been who she was, none of them would have. Fate had somehow aligned all of those near impossible moments and gave them all a family. Spacekru. In the sky or on the ground, they would always be her people.

 

****

 

“We need to be more careful, Madi,” Clarke tells the child as they go into Lexa’s tent.

 

“We’re always so careful,” she complains.

 

“People are talking.”

 

“That girl from Azgeda said.”

 

“Madi, look at me.” It was Lexa this time. The Commander kneeled down to the child’s level. “This is serious. There’s word going around that you weren’t a Natblida created by Clarke, that you were born with the blood. There’s people who want to prove it. If they do, you’ll be in danger. Clarke will be in danger.”

 

“You’ll be in danger? For hiding me?”

 

“People have staged a coup against me for less.”

 

“For loving Clarke.” Lexa nods.

 

“They thought me weak. They wanted me dead.”

 

“So they challenged you to solo gomplei and you killed the Queen instead. The flame showed me your memories, the important ones. Like leaving Clarke at the Mountain, swearing fealty to her, solo gomplei…you dying. Your Flamekeeper killed you, didn’t he? Did he die after?” Clarke nods. “Is he back?” This time Lexa nods. “Was he punished?”

 

“No. He learned last time. He already paid for it with his life.”

 

“You just forgave him?”

 

“Did anyone ever teach you what the pillars of the Commander are?”

 

“Gaia did. Wisdom, compassion, and strength.”

 

“Well, little one. It is wise to know that sometimes, forgiveness is important. Forgiveness is compassion. And forgiving someone for killing you…well that takes a lot of strength. So many terrible things happen in each of our lives, and if you hold hate in your heart it’ll snuff out your light. You don’t need to forgive every person who wrongs you, but if you can—forgive, whether they deserve it or not. I was in that dark place for a long time. Nia killed someone very dear to me and I was filled with so much hate. I accomplished many things but I closed myself off. I wasn’t me anymore. Then one day, I met Clarke. And little by little she let some light in until I could see clearly again. I know it’s frustrating, but now’s a good time to practice the pillars even if you aren’t Heda. It’s good for everyone to have wisdom, compassion, and strength. Use wisdom to know that we’re only trying to protect you, that we’re only having you be careful to keep you safe. Have compassion for us, for everyone who does what we all do for you. And be strong, someday soon being a Natblida won’t matter and you won’t need to hide.”

 

“What about you? If being a Natblida won’t matter, what if others try to take you down again?”

 

Clarke kneels down beside them, “we will all keep each other safe, Madi. I promise.”

 

**** 

 

Shadows danced across the old stone walls of the castle, the sound of the wind howling filling the halls. It was a dreary place, Dieran kom Trikru thought. But he knew war would be upon them soon, and he wanted to choose the winning side.

 

“My own son,” Nia scoffs, “well, I always knew he was a coward. He was his father’s son, after all. Echo and Ontari…I took those girls in, I raised them and this is the thanks I get? Maybe when I win, I’ll lock them in the dungeon to rot and think about how wrong they were to betray me instead of taking their heads. Clarke kom Skaikru, I’ll let her rot too. They aren’t my prizes though.”

 

“Who is your prize, my Queen?”

 

“The time of the Commanders will soon be over. Soon, false black blood will run through everyone’s veins and the real fight will begin. Soon, the leader won’t be determined by blood. Once Lexa,” she spits the name out, “is dead, I will rule this pathetic coalition. Azgeda will have all the power just like we should have from the start. That child will not rule no more.”

 

“You’ll send an assassin for her?”

 

“No. We need to let them turn everyone into false Natblidas. Let her cause her own unrest amongst the clans. Let them see her for who she truly is. Then I’ll put a bounty on her. I want her alive. I want her to scream and beg. And then…then I want her head.”

Chapter 20: All the Odds

TONDC

“Dieran is nowhere to be found. Nobody’s seen him since yesterday morning.”

 “What do you mean, he’s nowhere?” Lexa growls, anger spreading through her body. “How did this happen? Get me Jorum. He saw him last.”

Clarke started pacing the second Gustus retreated to find the guard. “Madi’s not safe.”

“We don’t know that.”

“Lexa! We do! He knows about Madi, he—”

“It wasn’t an accident,” Lexa says suddenly.

“What?”

“Ontari wasn’t slinking around. Unless she’s lying, she just happened to walk past the conversation. They wouldn’t be so careless, not for no reason and then have one disappear. No, there had to be a play happening here. Someone’s pulling the strings.”

“What? Lexa. Who?”

“I don’t know,” she sighs.

“Nia?” Lex lifts her head and looks at Clarke. “What if it wasn’t an accident Ontari heard?”

“Someone thinking if Ontari walked around talking about Madi being a Natblida, we’d focus on her and not who told her. That we’d be paranoid and fighting with her. We’d be so busy trying to silence her and cover up anything she said that we wouldn’t see anything coming.”

“What does she want?” Clarke complains. “Last time she wanted Ontari to be the next Commander. I may not trust Ontari, but I do believe she’s on our side.”

“Clarke…Dieran has been in all of our meetings. He knows our plans for Praimfaya. He knows the plan is to turn everyone into Nightbloods.”

“Madi’s not the target,” Clarke says as it dawns on her. “Madi was the distraction. You’re the target.”

“We need Indra and Anya now.”

“I’ll find them. You stay here and wait for Gustus to return, please.”

Lexa nods, knowing better than to argue with Clarke. She sits back down on her throne shakily. Things weren’t looking too good.

****

MOUNT WEATHER

“I should have heard back from the Queen by now.” Emerson says, staring at the calendar. “It’s been over three weeks.”

“How far a walk is the ice nation from here?” Cage asks him, annoyance visible in his features.

“Shouldn’t have taken her more than a week and a half at most. Once she relayed the message, someone would have gotten back with their own message in half the time on horseback.”

“You think the other savages captured her?”

“With all due respect, sir, once we make it up to the ground we have to live with these people. Calling them savages won’t bode well. We’ll need them.”

“We will not. We have our home, we have our own food, we have enough artillery to blow them to hell. We still have a missile.”

“Sir, I lived out there. Artillery and food isn’t enough to survive out there. There are more threats than just the people.”

Cage doesn’t look like he wants to hear him out but he doesn’t argue either. There isn’t time for that. “You figure it out. Send more of the prisoners out if you need to. I need to see if Mendez is any closer to getting around whatever barrier is keeping us from scrambling their tech. Then we need to figure out what to do about those savages before they attack us. We know they’ll strike again. They brought down their entire damn space station already! So instead of telling me about your problems why don’t you go and do something about it. If you need ideas, why don’t you go to containment and speak to my father next time instead of interrupting my very busy day.”

“Yes, sir.”

Emerson leaves the room, cursing under his breath. Both men were completely unaware that their conversation, and many before it, had been heard by a person hiding in the vent shaft.

****

TONDC

“How do we proceed forward? We can’t station more guards without alerting everyone else that something is wrong,” Anya says.

“No. It was a guard who did this,” Lexa tells her former mentor. “Everyone in this room is those we can without a doubt trust. Everyone else we have to be careful with what we say.” She surveys the small group in the room. She and Clarke were in the room, as were Gustus, Anya, Indra, a couple of her most trusted guards that she knew would rather die than turn on her, Octavia, Echo, Raven and Kane.

“Last time Emerson worked with the Queen,” Raven speaks up. “And we know that they want Nia on their side again this time.”

“Emerson sent me with a message for Nia,” Echo nods. She had already told them this much. “By now he must have realized the message never reached her. Whatever he plans, it’ll take time to do it. So Nia is doing this on her own. What happens once one of them reach the other and they have assistance?”

“We need to move forward with our plans for the Mountain,” Indra says. “It can’t wait.”

“We’re not ready,” Kane disagrees, shaking his head.

“We need to be,” Clarke tells him. “Once Nia teams up with Mount Weather…with Nia’s knowledge of the land, her spies and allies and Mount Weather’s artillery, it’d be game over.”

“Clarke’s right, Kane,” Raven tells him.

“You have two days to come up with the best plan you can,” Lexa tells Raven. “Then, I’ll call upon the armies of the twelve clans. There won’t be anything Nia can do to stop it.”

“Nia can use the distraction of everyone together to have you killed, Heda,” Gustus warns his young Commander.

“I know. I’m counting on that.”

“Heda?” Anya’s brows furrow.

“Don’t worry, Anya,” she shares a tense look with Clarke. “I know what I’m doing. There’s another plan happening side by side with this one. I need all of you to focus on planning the assault on the Mountain. Raven, all we have is at your disposable. Jorum will bring you and the others who know tech to dig through and find anything you think you could use. Everyone else, round up those you trust to help you figure things out. Clarke, Octavia, Echo, with me.”

Lexa leaves the council room with Clarke and the other two warriors following. She knows Gustus and Anya were itching to follow her but they stayed where they were needed. They head away from the main council room, down through the outskirts until they arrived at the remains of another building. They head inside where their audiences await.

“The others are brainstorming. Raven and Monty will come up with a plan, especially with Sinclair’s help.” Clarke is the first to speak. She looks at the others in the room. Bellamy, Murphy, Roan and Ontari.

“What’s our plan?” Ontari asks, the young Natblida shifts, eying Murphy who eyed her right back. Clarke knew they had a complicated relationship last time but she didn’t know the extent of what happened. The two had begrudgingly agreed to be civil, but she knew they’d probably never move beyond that.

“The odds of Nia taking advantage of the chaos of the armies of twelve clans is high. She’ll find an opportunity to try to take out Lexa to assert herself as leader, especially since she probably knows by now the plan of everyone becoming Nightbloods. In another circumstance she’d bide her time and wait for the chaos that will happen when we try to turn everyone into Nightbloods, but if she’s handed the opportunity to do it easily and sooner?”

“Then she’ll take it,” Roan agrees with Clarke.

“So what, we hide the Commander?” Bellamy asks.

“No. I’m the bait,” Lexa says simply. “I have to be there through it all. Nia won’t miss it. She’ll come. She’ll have an assassin do her dirty work for her but she’ll come. And when that happens…”

“We ambush her assassination attempt with an assassination?” Bellamy asks. He looks at his girlfriend and eyes widen a little. “No way.”

“She was a spy and a damn good one. She can do it, Bellamy,” Octavia tells her brother.

“No. You can’t risk her life like that.”

“Bellamy.” He looks at Echo when she speaks. “If we don’t take out Nia and she does win, I’m dead anyways. We all are. I can do it.” Her gaze shifts to the other two Azgeda members. “We can do it.”

“Take out the Queen while we take out the Mountain,” Murphy speaks up. “Two birds with one stone. How hard could it be?”

Chapter 21: Moments

Notes:

Hey guys, sorry it's been almost a month! My life has been hectic. I had an injury and was out of work for a month and I was too stressed and too sore to do much writing and I've been exhausted from going from no work to full blown back in work with no easing, just "hey you got cleared. Here's your full blown schedule with normal chores. Good luck!" Horses and barn work is SO. MUCH. WORK guys. And I got 2 horses of my own. Do not recommend lmao.

On another note, this chapter is nearly double the usual length! Hope you enjoy!

“I can’t believe you did this,” Sinclair says, looking between Monty and Raven.

“You taught me how to,” Raven reminds him. “Plus, it wasn’t hard. We made one with less last time. Monty and I like to defy the odds. And the scrap Lexa let us look through definitely helped. You won’t believe the stuff we found that could be viable for projects in the near future.”

“Raven thinks she can make some low-grade armor for our frontliners.”

“Chest plates at least, to protect abdomens from bullets. We know Mount Weather will be using firepower when we fight them.”

“And Lexa gave us permission to teach the warriors that want to learn to shoot guns,” says Kane’s voice as he enters. “David and Nate Miller are setting up the practice range. What’s been accomplished in here?”

“These two have built a radio and I believe we’ll be listening in on the Mountain by tonight,” Sinclair says, looking at his proteges proudly.

“Lexa’s riders are heading out to alert the armies of the twelve clans at first light. It’s all coming together. The clans will take some days to all gather, and in a week we’ll be heading for hopefully our first and last war before Praimfaya comes.”

“Are you forgetting the queen?” Monty asks. “Azgeda?”

“Lexa said she has a plan. She’s not letting us in on it because she wants us focused on the Mountain, but she has a team she trusts and we just have to trust them to see it through.”

“Octavia’s in on it,” Raven says slowly, knowing how the man felt.

Kane had been speaking to Indra, and his friend had been trying to make him see reason. “She’s a girl. She’s just a girl. Her actions were her own, but they were fueled by others. Abby and I included. I can’t…it’d be hypocritical to still hate her without hating Abby, or myself.”

“Wow. That’s a grown up this to say, Kane. Indra’s influence?”

“Yes,” he admits.

“Good. We all need to be on the same page and not holding things against each other from a literal lifetime ago. I’m going to go find Finn and Wells, see if they want to go search more of the scrap with me. Monty, take a break. Harper probably misses you.”

“Raven, you take a break too,” Sinclair says and stops Raven before she can protest. “I will go look through the junk with the others. You should go spend time with your friends before everything descends into chaos.”

“Okay,” she agrees.

“That was easy.”

“We don’t know how this will end. I’m not wasting anymore time with the people I love.”

****

“What happened to taking it slow?” Anya asks as Clarke groans, picking herself up off the ground. She’d admit to herself that she was proud to see the sky girl rise every time she knocked her down. Not that she’d tell her that. A part of her also enjoyed knocking her down. Clarke was growing on her, but she still didn’t particularly like her. She did however like her influence on the Commander, though she’d never admit that to either of them.

“I know footwork and building muscle and strength has been really important to learn and there’s still more to learn, but we’re heading into a war soon. A war in which Nia is likely planning on trying to take our Commander out. I know even if we trained all day every day I wouldn’t be a skilled fighter in a short time, but maybe I can be enough to give her a fighting chance. Maybe I could make a difference, even a small one. Maybe it’d be enough. I can’t lose her again.”

“You’re doing your best for her. Not out of duty but because you care for her. You’re already enough. But understood.”

“If anyone can make me something of a fighter in time, it’s you.”

“I might actually like you one day,” Anya tells her reluctantly. Clarke chuckles at that.

“You definitely like kicking my butt.”

“I do,” she allows a rare smile before her face turns serious again. “Okay. don’t let me knock you down.

Clarke lasts longer in staying upright than before, swiping her leg and knocking Anya’s balance off but not knocking her down. But Anya’s proud nod and light praise was enough to fill her with more determination. The two kept at it for a while until Anya was satisfied with the blonde’s progress and Clarke was rightfully sore and tired.

“Same time tomorrow barring anything popping up?”

Anya nods to her and the two go their separate ways.

****

“My riders are riding out at first light to notify the clans. Azgeda will likely be ome of the first to arrive with how close they are to us. Nia will show up but she’ll wait. But we need to be ready in case she doesn’t. She’ll wait until we’re near the mountain and everyone is gathered,” Lexa informs her team. She and Clarke were gathered with Octavia, Murphy, Bellamy, Echo, Roan and Ontari. “Jorum and a few very trusted guards have been let in on the plan. As has Indra and Anya but they’re focus is on the mountain.”

“When the time comes,” Clarke begins, “Bellamy, Murphy and Roan will be security detail. Octavia and I will be moving back and forth keeping everyone in on the loop. And Echo and Ontari are our eyes and ears. We all have a place. Harper has volunteered to keep Madi with her and Monroe when the clans arrive.”

“Anya wants to do some training with all of you, in case you need to fight hand to hand,” Lexa tells them, mainly the Skaikru members.”

“Anya’s been training me,” Clarke assures Bellamy and Murphy who shared looks.

“I’m also willing to train so Anya doesn’t have to overdue it. We need her at her full strength too,” Roan offers.

“Thank you, Roan,” Lexa nods. She turns her attention to the youngest Azgeda member. “Are you up for this?”

“I’ve been ready to take Nia out for a long time, Commander,” Ontari says firmly.

“And ready to accept Roan as the king one Nia falls and honor the coalition?”

“Trust me, I don’t want it again.” She shakes her head with a shudder. “You’re my Commander…and Skaikru isn’t that bad. Some of them aren’t anyways.”

There’s a knock on the door and Roan opens it, taking an early start to his security detail. “Heda, it’s Jorum.” Lexa approaches her trusted guard and they talk too quietly for anyone else to hear.

“Murphy,” Lexa calls to the sky boy. “It’s for you.”

He looks at the young Commander in confusion and walks over to them. He follows Jorum out, wondering what was for him. He didn’t think it was a trap, but his brain couldn’t help but go there.

All his doubt went away in an instant.

“John!”

He’s running and scooping her up in his arms, holding her close. He almost couldn’t believe she was here. “I love you, I love you,” she says into her hair and she just laughs happily against his neck. “I would rather take a few more hours with you over forever without.” The last few weeks awake without her had been hell for him. “How are you here? I was, I was just waiting for the war to start and end to get the rover so I could get to you.”

“Some of the Commander’s men found me and my brother, told me they’d bring me to you. They mentioned Raven, Monty, Harper, Echo and Bellamy too so it seemed real. I figured I’d live dangerously and believe them. I’m glad I did.”

“Me, too,” he makes out before crashing their lips together. One small piece fell back into place and the future looked just a little bit brighter.

****

“You sent a team to get that girl just to make one person happy,” Anya comments. Lexa can’t tell if she disapproved or not, Anya’s emotions locked tight.

“Not just one person. She was part of a group, a group I very much need whole. And when they’re whole, others around them will be.”

“That’s not why you did it, Lexa.”

“He loves her. I don’t know him well, but I understand him. He won’t be fully there without his other half. I wouldn’t be.”

“Lexa.” They were treading on dangerous waters now.

“Anya, I need you to promise me something.”

“Yes, Heda.”

“No as the commanding chief. As my former mentor, my…friend.”

“Lexa…”

“If we don’t succeed in time—”

“Lexa, no. Don’t go there.”

“Anya. Please. If this plan goes wrong, if Echo can’t take Nia out before she gets to me, promise me you’ll take care of them. Take care of Clarke and Madi.”

“Lexa.”

“Anya, don’t let her blame herself. Don’t let her close in on herself. Yu take care of me. And Madi, you protect Madi. Don’t let them take her or hurt her. She’s not just a little girl, she’s our future. She’s special.”

“You’re special, Lexa. You always were.”

“Anya.”

“I promise. That won’t be an easy thing to do though so you better not let this ice queen kill you now after avoiding it all these years. You can’t let her kill you, not now that you have a family.”

“You disapprove.”

“I did, at first. But you’ve never been one to fully conform to our ways.” She places her hands on her former mentee’s shoulders. “That’s what makes you special. You see things differently than anyone else does. You’re the Commander that’s going to be able to get us where we need to go when the world falls again. You aren’t just respected, you are loved amongst the clans. No other Commander has ever been as loved and respected as you are. I knew it would be you from the moment you were assigned to me when you were no older than that little girl.”

“Would you think of me differently if I told you I was afraid?”

“No,” Anya shakes her head. “You need to put your brave face off and not show weakness out there. But in here you’re only human. You’ve had so much put on your shoulders and you’re so young still. I think I get it. What you said about wanting the Natblidas out of Polis.”

“They deserve more,” Lexa whispers quietly. “Aden would shine so brightly if he got to see the world and just live. He’ll be so good for Madi.”

“You’ve really thought this through, haven’t you?”

“Every day. I need to look forward. If I don’t, I won’t make it through this battle.”

“Have you told Clarke about how you feel?”

Lexa shakes her head. “I can’t burden her with that. She already worries so much for me and for Madi.” She breathes in shakily, blinking back unshed tears. “Can you hold me, just a moment?”

Anya nods and dropped her guard. She wraps her arm around her and held her close. She held her for a moment but had no intention of letting her go.

Chapter 22: Maya

Notes:

I do not know how disabling defenses and stuff works, so I apologize if things aren't correct/logical.

Mount Weather

“Where are we with the plan?”

It had been weeks and Cage’s patience was wearing thin. He wanted these savages dead now. Every attempt to reach the queen seemed to fail and he was losing his patience with Emerson who had promised a meeting with the Commander-hating queen.  

“Multiple armies are en route to TonDC. Like before but bigger this time. they’re building force against us it seems,” Emerson informs him.

“So why are they alive?” Cage snaps. “Why is she still alive?”

When he had learned that the Commander was just a girl, he didn’t even blink. And he didn’t hesitate to demand her death. He wanted her dead and he wanted Clarke dead. He wanted everyone who would stand in his way dead. He figured cutting off the head of the snake—the two girls who foiled his plan time and time again—the rest would follow.

“Because I finally got a response from The Queen. She’s heading to TonDC.”

“Why the hell is she going there? Did you not tell her our plan?”

“I did, sir. But she wants to kill the Commander herself. I guess the two of them have a…complicated history.”

Cage scowls. “How does an older queen have a complicated history with a Commander who’s no older than a child?”

“I didn’t ask that, sir. I think our best course is to let the Queen kill the Commander, let all the armies gather and hit them as they head our way. when they reach the kill zone, we release the fog. And any who escape, we’ll hit with the missile.”

“And waste our resources when we can hit them the moment they all gather?”

“Because if the Queen doesn’t get the signal she’ll pull her army. Trust me, sir. The Ice Nation is the last clan we want to face once we’re on the ground. And if we blow them up now, how do we get the people from the Ark to use their marrow? Nia promised that if we allow her to kill the Commander, her warriors will capture the people from the Ark and deliver them, including Clarke. And she’ll let us be once we’re on the ground as long as we leave her alone. it’s our best course of action.”

“It better be. If this plan fails, Emerson, you’ll wish you were never resurrected.”

They both look up when they hear a scramble from above. The sound of someone quickly moving through the vents. “Find who that is. And kill them.”

Up in the vents, a young child scurried out. She crawled out of the vent, running as fast as she could the moment she was out. “Kill them” rang through her head as she sprinted, breathing heavily in fear. She ran and ran until she reached the door she needed. She knocked the secret knock and the door opened.

“Lucy, you’re back. Were you followed?” A kind woman, Margaret, asks and she shakes their head.

“I don’t—I don’t think so. They heard me though.”

“Hurry in,” she pulls her inside the room and leads her to the secret wall, ushering her in.

“Lucy!” Maya says when she sees the little girl. She gives the man she was talking with an apologetic smile before going over to the child. “Did you hear anything?”

“They heard me.” Maya pales a little. “They didn’t follow me. I heard them though. The outsiders are gathering together now. They’ll be all gathered by first light. There’s a queen, she wants to kill the Commander. She told Emerson that if they let her kill her, she’ll capture the Arkers and bring them for their bones. Cage said the Commander was no older than a child. Their leader is a kid?”

“Like a big kid, like me,” Maya tells her, “what’s their plan, Luce?”

“After the queen kills the Commander and she takes over, the army will come our way. She’ll lead them to the kill zone where all but Ice Nation will be hit by the fog. And any that escape will be hit with the missile.”

“Dad?” Maya calls immediately and Vincent walked over to her.

“I heard,” he says tensely.

“We need to take out their defenses.”

“Maya, no. It’s too dangerous. You heard Lucy. They’ll be looking for us actively now that they know they were heard by someone.”

“They’re our friends!”

“I know—”

“Jasper, Monty, Harper! Bellamy, Octavia!”

“I know, I know.”

“We can do this, Dad. Please. It’s not just them. If they kill the outsiders, there’s no chance for us. We need them, Dad.”

Vincent sighs heavily. “Alright. We gotta do it all at once though.”

“I can take Jenna to disable the fog. She’s good at the science stuff.”

“Take Alex too.”

“No, you need Alex. We’re sneaking to the boiler. You’re going to go disable a missile.”

“We’re going to need Liam too. He’s also good at this…science stuff. I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

“We’ve got this. We owe it to everyone good to stop them.”

“I know,” he sighs. “Come here, kid.” He pulls Maya into a hug. “You be safe.”

“You, too.”

****

Maya swiped the card she was given by one of the guards that assisted them. She and Jenna entered the boiler room and the former shudders.

“How did your friends do it last time?”

“Flame, blew it up.”

“They blew it up?!”

“Sh!” Maya hisses. “But yes. He did. It’s a good thing we’ve got you and Liam. If not, I’d be blowing the fog and I don’t know what we’d even do about the missile.”

“I’m glad to help,” the other teen smiles.

The two head over to where they’re needed. Jenna types at the keyboard and pulls up options, brow furrowing in concentration. Maya did her best not to pace—Jenna hated it when people moved around or made too much noise when she worked. If they were in chaos, she could do it, but she worked best and the quickest when things were still and quiet.

“Jenna?” Maya asks when minutes drag on and she notices they’d been on here nearly an hour.

“Almost got it. just one more minute,” she says, eyes not leaving the screen. “And…done.”

“What stops them from enabling it?”

“They kinda can’t. Not without creating everything new from scratch and it’ll be hard since I made it nearly impossible to do so and definitely not before the army reaches us. I don’t really have time to explain, come on!”

The two bolted to the door. Maya swiped the card and the two exited. They barely made it out the door before Maya collided with a body. She looked up and inhaled sharply when her eyes met Emerson’s.

“Maya, Maya. We’ve been looking for you for weeks. Do you realize the disruption you’ve caused again?”

Maya tries to pull away. “Let me go! It’s going to blow!”

“You didn’t.”

“I did,” she lies, face sober.

He hauls her forward and they bolt down the hall. He knocks them down and gets down himself. A minute passes and when nothing else happens he yanks them back up. “You lied.”

“Yep,” Maya kicks him in the shin, hard. He loses his grip on Jenna. “Run!” She yells to her friend and the other girl bolts.

“We’ll find your friend. But right now, you’ll due. Cage has been on my ass since day one, you being caught will make him ease up a little. Cut off the head of the snake, per say,” he says as he drags her down the hall.

They didn’t get far before Lucy appears in front of them.

“Mister! I need your help, please!” She begs, tear tracks on her little face. “My friend is dead. Someone killed him! Help me!” She runs around the corner with a sob.

Emerson brings Maya and they halt when they see a little boy laying on the ground, a puddle of blood around him. “What the—” He’s cut off by something hitting him over the head. He falls with a thud and Maya nearly jumps out of her skin when the dead boy leapt up.

“Ketchup,” he says with a cheeky smile.

“Who—” She swings around to see Jenna.

“Didn’t think I’d leave you, did you?”

“Never. Come on,” she took Lucy’s hand and Jenna took Zachary’s and they four ran to safety.

****

“He’s late.”

“He’ll be alright, child,” Margaret offers.

This time Maya did pace. “He’s been gone for hours. What if they caught him? What if he’s dead? I sent him out there!”

“He’ll be okay. He has Alex and Liam. Alex is strong and Liam is smart and your dad is a survivor and planner. He organized this entire resistance.”

“I know, I just…I worry. Last time…” She sighs and sniffles. “I just need him to be okay.”

“He will. I have faith,” Lucy speaks up.

“Me, too,” Zachary adds. “I always do.”

“Good will win,” Lucy says confidently.

“Thanks guys,” Maya gives the children a watery smile.

The door opens and she swings around in shock before breathing a sigh in relief. Alex is limping, being supported by Liam and her father. “We’re okay,” Vincent says quickly. “Ran into some trouble. Alex kept us safe, took a hit to the leg. Don’t think its broken but we need Maria to check him out.

Maria, the doctor that joined the resistance, rushed over to the guard.

“Dad!” Maya flung herself into his arms.

“I’m okay. You’re okay?”

“Yeah,” she nods against his shoulder. “Is it done?”

“It’s done. Nobody’s using that missile.”

“Good.” She sighs. “Dad, we have one more mission to do.”

“Okay, kiddo. Let’s do this.”

****

TonDC

“Do you hear that?” Raven asks Monty when they hear the radio crackle to life. Raven messes with the dials, trying to get the static to clear up. The voice becomes more prominent.

“Mount Weather to the Outsiders. This is The Resistance. Do you copy?”

“That’s Maya,” Monty says slowly. His eyes widen. “Harper! Get Jasper!” Harper was already halfway out of the tent when he said it and his shoulders relax just a bit. He grabs it and clicks it on. “This is Monty Green responding from the ground to the Resistance, do you copy?”

“Monty!” There’s relief in her voice. “Is, um, is Jasper there?”

“Harper’s getting him. Is this a secure line?”

“It should be. I have a friend who’s like the girl version of you.” Monty laughs at that. “We have news for you.”

“Good, I hope.”

“It’s as good as it gets.”

Jasper enters the tent looking frazzled and Monty hands him the radio quickly. “Maya?!”

“Jasper.”

“Are you okay? Are you safe?”

“I am for now. We have a resistance in here. A good fifty people. We have those on the outside getting us food, water supplies. We’re hanging in there. we heard from news from Cage and Emerson today. They got ahold of some Queen. She plans on killing the Commander. She’s heading to your camp to kill her and abduct as many of your people from the Ark as possible. The plan was when you got into the kill zone after the Commander’s death to wipe you out with the fog and then the missile to make sure the job was done. My friend and I disable the fog and my dad and his friend got the missile deactivated. But it still won’t be easy.”

“We don’t need easy. We just need possible. We all talked, us and the Grounders. This time we’re all in it together. We’re going to win without killing anyone this time. Only the guilty will die. We’ve had volunteers to donate their marrow once it’s won to the people that remain after.”

“Thank you. We’ll do everything we can to help the battle from the inside. We’re your inside men and women this time.”

“Good because we’re counting on you.”

****

The knock sounded in the room where they had been meeting.

“Come in,” Lexa calls and Gustus entered.

“Heda, they’re here.”

“Nia?”

“She came. And she’s heavily guarded. She was looking around the camp, she was looking to spot you. Heda, please, let me—”

“No. If this isn’t done properly, the clans will be at war with each other. We have no proof and I do not need the clans losing faith in me before we face the mountain. Is that all?”

“Yes, Heda.”

“Then you may leave and find Anya. Fill her in.”

“Yes, Heda.” He bows his head and disappears out the door, closing it behind him.

She turns to the others. “This is it. this is what we’ve all been training for. Echo, are you ready?”

“I am,” she nods, picking up her bow.

“Everyone else know what they’re job is?”

There was a chorus of yesses and she nods, swallowing back the lump in her throat. This was it. “Okay. let’s do this then.”

Chapter 23: Anything Suspicious

TonDC was bustling with restless warriors of the twelve clans, soldiers of the Ark mingling in with them. Anya walked the perimeter restlessly, eyes searching for any Azgeda warriors or their allies out of place. She hated her young commander being a target, and hated the idea of another love or worse, the child, being used against her as much.

“Bellamy and Murphy are watching on the other side,” a quiet voice says behind her.

Anya looks at the young mechanic and nods. “If you must stay over here, walk with me and keep your eyes out for anything suspicious.”

Raven falls in step with the warrior. “Murphy said they’re plan is tight, whatever that means. He seems confident. He says Clarke and Lex—the Commander doesn’t seem any more worried than before. Echo, Roan and Ontari are getting ready.”

“Why do all of your people call her by her name?” she asks, light annoyance in her tone.

“I—we mostly know of her through Clarke. Most of us don’t really know her well, plenty of us have never even met her. I did, a few times before the restart. Things weren’t…pleasant. But Clarke always talked about her saying ‘Lexa.’ Plus, plenty of us have authority issues.”

“You don’t say…”

“I mean, the council voted to send a hundred kids down to what was thought to be a possibly radioactive plant with no survivors as guinea pigs…as a test, per say, because they were expendable.”

“Because you broke the law?” She remembered several conversations spoken about the subject but she never cared enough to ask any questions.

“Octavia’s crime was being born.” Anya frowns at that. “Because of lack of supplies and oxygen, a family was only allowed one child. Jasper and Monty were dumb kids and stole weed. I wasn’t one of the hundred but I was the reason one of them was.”

“What did you do?”

“I failed the physical exam to do my job up there. Something with my heart, it was a one in a million shot my heart would ever give out but they didn’t think it was worth it. For my eighteenth birthday, my boyfriend at the time arranged an illegal spacewalk that wasted a couple months of oxygen.”

“What’s a…spacewalk?”

“It’s a…we should talk about that later because that looks suspicious.” She points to the queen who was talking to a few individuals who had cloaks shrouding their heads. “Do warriors or anyone dress like that.”

“Only assassins,” Anya murmurs. “We need to alert the others that it’s in motion.”

Raven holds up her walkie. “Secure channel, tell them all using codes in a minute.”

“I might actually not hate you.”

“Thanks. I think.”

****

“Warriors of the clans, today is a day we plan so we can fix our past tomorrow. At first light we will march on the mountain. A team of mountain men defectors are preparing for their own battle inside at this very moment. The leader of them has been hard at work with the Skaikru who are good at the tech part. We will surround the mountain. Monty kom Skaikru, Raven kom Skaikru and two within the mountain will get the doors open. The two from inside will be taking out the generators temporarily to cut the power to the door and then it’s Monty and Raven’s job to open the door. We will have a short window before the backup generator comes on, much like before. Thanks to Sinclair and Raven kom Skaikru, a shield has been created to protect those in range from the mountain men’s guns. Once it’s open, we will be at war. There will be losses on both sides. To limit our losses, the Skaikru soldiers have been showing warriors of the clans how to wield a gun. Anyone else who wants to learn, I encourage you to. The legend is false, the mountain men want us gone whether we hold a gun or a sword.” There’s a grumble that’s a mix of agreeance and disagree. “When we march inside the mountain, the plan we had once before will stand. Only the guilty will fall. Anyone who lays down their weapons and surrenders will be allowed to live.”

“And what will become of the ones we allow to live, Heda?” Nia stood in defiance, steely eyes locked onto the young Commander.

“Like the Skaikru, they will live with us in coexistence. Together, we will all prepare for what’s the come. We’ll need their knowledge of living underground and their resources so as many people can survive Praimfaya as possible.”

“And we’ll live in the mountain for six years?” she sneers. She’s baiting her, trying to see if she’ll slip about the night blood. Lexa just stares back.

“If you’d rather stay outside the bunker and burn, Nia, that’s your decision.”

“We’re supposed to follow you blindly through this war? What’s to stop the ones who surrendered to try to take us out again!”

“You’re the one who teamed up with the sole survivor last time and blew up the mountain. You started a war! Maybe we should all question you this time, not me. Does anyone else here question my decisions?”

There’s a murmur and heads shaking. There’s some resentment here and there, but in most of the leaders eyes, their young Commander had never failed them. All the wrong they can remember, everything from the City of Light and Praimfaya, happened after the girl was killed.

“Rest tonight. Tomorrow, we march.”

She stepped down and walked through them and the crowd parted for her like the sea.

****

Everyone was getting ready in some way or another.

Lincoln sat in his tent, Octavia leaning back against him. He held onto her tightly. They would march together and he would keep her in his sights, but it didn’t make the fear of losing her again, of her losing him again, any less. They sat in silence, soaking in the quiet moment. He stroked her hair back absentmindedly. No words were needed between them, they just needed each other.

Murphy and Emori were on watch. Words weren’t shared between them, either. But Murphy kept a firm grip around her shoulders. He’d be damned if they separated so close after being reunited.

Monty was in his tent with Harper, pressing a sweet kiss to her lips. He didn’t have long before he had to join Raven and Sinclair, so he was staying as close to his love as he could. “I love yous” were whispered against lips and hands held on to each other desperately.

“Do you have to go now?” Bellamy asked Echo, who was shoving provisions into her pack.

“We don’t know when Nia could strike. I’ll be okay. I won’t be alone.”

“No you’ll be with the person you were convinced wanted you dead weeks ago.”

“You’re the one who told me that Roan’s intentions were clean, Bellamy.”

“I’m just worried. I want to go with you.”

“I know.” She rests her head on his shoulder. “Octavia and Clarke need you here. I need you here taking care of the rest of our family.”

“You better come back to me.”

“I will.”

Their moment is interrupted by the tent flap flying open. Clarke enters the tent breathless. “I’m sorry, I—”

“Clarke? What’s wrong?”

“Is it Madi?” Echo asks.

“N-no. Madi’s okay. She’s with my mom. I need your help. I can’t find Lexa anywhere. She hasn’t been seen since she left the meeting.”

Chapter 24: Doomed Us All

“I need to go. Now.”

That was all Echo said before disappearing out of the tent. Clarke went to follow but Bellamy caught her arm. “You need to go to Anya.”

“What I need is to find Lexa!”

“That’s what Echo’s doing. Her job. Yours is to be at the head of this.”

“It’s Lexa!”

“I know, Clarke, okay? But you need to do your job like everyone else. I’m going to go out there and do mine which right now includes subtly looking for your girlfriend since I’m security detail. Clarke? Who was supposed to be with her after the meeting? Someone’s supposed to be with you, her and Madi at all times now that Nia’s here.”

“Jorum. He’s nowhere to be found, either.”

“Go to Anya to figure this out, I’ll find him.”

Clarke sucks in a deep breath and heads out towards when Anya last was. Bellamy was right, she needed to focus on her job. She was struggling to focus without her Commander by her side. They needed her to fight the mountain, she needed her. Without her, who would keep the coalition together as they faced their greatest foe?

She approached Anya who’s grim face told her that she hadn’t found anything. But she had to ask anyways. “Anything?”

“Nothing. Nia isn’t acting suspicious and she hasn’t disappeared at all. So if someone took her, Nia hasn’t gone yet.”

“She’d have someone else take her anyways,” Clarke chokes out. “She’ll want to k…she’d want to do that herself but she’d have someone else take her so she didn’t get caught.”

“If she’s missing and Nia’s still here, it means she’s still alive, Clarke. We need to address this. We need to keep everyone going forward.”

“Anya…”

“If on the off chance Nia doesn’t know she’s missing, we can’t hand her anything to use against her. We keep the army together, we still march at first light whether we find her or not. Lexa would want us to keep going with or without her.”

“Anya.”

“Clarke, we need to be strong.”

“What do we tell them?” she swallows, taking a steadying breath.

“Heda and Jorum went on a scouting mission. She went ahead last time, did she not?”

“To take out the gun men.”

“Then she could do it again.”

“But—”

“We need our people to all have faith in her, not doubt her. We owe her that much.”

“You said our people.”

“Damn Heda and her feelings is infectious,” she grumbles. “Come on. Let’s make sure our armies are all ready to go at first light. Let’s make our Heda proud.”

****

“Where is our Commander?”

It was the first thing Nia questioned as Clarke, Indra, and Anya checked in.

“She went ahead on a scouting mission,” Anya says calmly. “She entrusted us to prepare everyone as she makes sure it’s safe. Heda wants this mission to succeed. She needs her warriors well rested so she volunteered to go.” 

“With just…one other person?” Nia challenges.

Clarke sees it in her eyes. She knows. Before she can take a step, Anya grabs her arm to halt her. Anya can tell that Nia knows exactly where the Commander was, but they couldn’t question her, not when she’d deny it. Not when the clans would cast accusations and fall apart. Not when Anya and Clarke would lose the trust for lying to them.

“We can’t exactly have a bunch of warriors out there now, can we? Are you questioning our Commander?”

“No.” She looks Clarke in her eyes when she says her next line. “She’s exactly where she needs to be.” Anya tightens her hold on Clarke, trying to keep her own emotions at bay. “It’d be a shame though. If she were to get hurt…or killed…why she’s out there all on her own.”

“Is that a threat?” Anya asks in a steely voice.

By now, the warriors gathered and giving uneasy looks between the Ice Queen and the other two women. It wouldn’t be the first time the queen had made a threat to the young Commander’s life and it wouldn’t be the first time she’d challenged Anya or went after the blonde sky girl. But a lot of them could tell that whatever was happening now was somehow different than the times before.

Anya sees Clarke swallowing hard and blinking back tears and is quick to dismiss everyone, locking cold eyes with the queen until she’s gone. “Follow her,” Anya instructs Gustus who nods and slips out of the tent.

“Sh-she said she’s gonna h-hurt her or…or k-kill her,” Clarke makes out shakily in broken English.

“Hey. Hey, she will not have someone else do that. She’d do it herself. You said that. As long as we have eyes on her here, the higher the chances of our people out there looking find her. Understand?” She nods jerkily. “Breathe. Wipe your tears and go out there. You are a leader, Klark kom Skaikru. Your one and only focus is the mountain. This is our one and only shot at this. Lexa will be found, maybe not until after but she will be. When we find her, you will tell her how you led our people to the mountain and won. You won’t be telling her how you were weak and failed. If you fail because she’s missing you will further instill the notion that love is weakness. Use your love for her to fuel this mission, and you can tell everyone how your love, her love, is strength.”

“Love is strength,” she whispers back. “She makes me strong.”

“She does. So let’s go make her proud.”

“Okay,” she nods, sniffing. She washes her face under Anya’s dutiful gaze and they head to the flap. It opens before they reach it.

“Bellamy? What did you find.”

“Jorum. He’s dead.”

“He’s what?” Clarke looks at her friend with wide eyes.

“No sign of Lexa. Not even a sign of a struggle. The weird thing is, there’s what appears to be a man’s footprint leading from camp over to where Lexa and Jorum’s prints were. And Lexa’s prints and the man’s are walking away, not running. She went off with someone.”

“She’d only go off with someone she trusted…” Clarke’s eyes widen and she ducks out of the tent quickly with Anya at her heels. “No.”

****

Lexa came to slowly and groggily at first and then her senses returned. She looked around her surroundings, seeing she was in a cabin of some sorts. She blinks, wincing at the pulsing pain in her head.

“Easy now.”

She freezes at the familiar voice and looks over to them. Her eyes widen, the pain in her head forgotten. “No.”

“I’m sorry, Heda.”

“You betrayed me,” she seethes in anger and hurt.

“I saved you. This is how you live.”

“You…you’re working with Nia?”

“She came to me. Proposed a deal that keeps you alive. You disappear for a while and let the coalition turn to her. And once they do, you’ll be set free.”

“You want the clans to think their Commander abandoned them right before a war?”

Lexa swallows. “You really think she’d set me free? No. She’s wanted my death since I was a little girl. When I was twelve she sent an assassin for me. She killed Costia. She staged a coup. She wants my head. And you’ve delivered me right to her!”

“She did a sacred oath Heda, you will be spared.”

“And if she does, it’ll only be after the clans I spent years leading hate me and follow Azgeda. Clarke?”

“If she doesn’t cause a problem, she’ll be spared.”

“It’s Clarke. She’ll do everything to find me.”

“I’m sorry, Heda.”

“Really, you’re sorry?” She questions, swallowing the lump in her throat. Commander’s don’t cry. “You swore a sacred oath to protect me. To serve me. You promised! And now…now you’ve doomed us all.”

Notes:

Up next we'll finally see them head out at first light and get to the mountain. And find out who the person who betrayed Lexa is.

Chapter 25: The Start of War

Notes:

At 3k words this is my longest chapter for this story so enjoy!

“Warriors of the twelve clans, Skaikru, today is the day we’ve been waiting for,” Anya’s voice projects across the field. “We are about to march to the mountain to bring down their reign of terror—the right way. Remember, we are only there to kill their leadership and any who holds arms against us. Anyone who surrenders will be spared! Heda has not returned yet which tells us something has her caught up, maybe the mountain men, maybe the reapers. We will do what we came here for and we will make our Heda proud!”

The warriors cheered, weapons raised. If there was a rumble of complaint, none was heard. They were ready to march, ready to fight, ready to do what they could for their Commander.

The lack of complaint, lack of anything being questioned made Clarke scan the crowd. That’s when she realized Nia wasn’t there.

“Where’s Nia?” Clarke whispers to Anya.

“I don’t know. Gustus was following her and hasn’t checked in. wherever she is, he’s tracking her. He better be tracking her and not ending up like Jorum.” She swallows and sighs. “We can’t think about that now. We need to focus on our mission. We leave in an hour, Clarke. Your head needs to be all in. I know you’re scared for Heda, she’s been missing for two days now, but we need to trust that she can handle herself and trust Gustus to be okay and find her.”

“Easier said than done.”

“I know. I worry too, you know. I’ve known her since she was little, littler than your Madi. She’s important to me. She always has been.”

“I’m sorry,” Clarke sighs. “She’s your family too.”

Anya just makes a soft sound of agreeance. “Let’s go get ready to march.”

The two headed over to where everyone was getting ready. They went their separate ways, Anya heading to where Indra was speaking with some chiefs as Clarke ducked into her tent. Lexa’s tent. She looks around and holds back her tears, covering her mouth with her hand. She holds back a choked sob. “I’m sorry,” she chokes out. “Please be okay.”

She gathers what she needs, letting to tears roll down her cheeks. Only when she needed to leave her tent did she wipe away her tears and wet a cloth, washing all remnants of tears away.

She leaves the tent and almost runs into Octavia. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Clarke says shakily.

“Echo’s not back. She’s still out searching and she’ll keep searching until she finds her. Bellamy’s staying behind but Murphy’s coming. Only one of them needs to stay in case they do find her and need help.”

“He needs to stay with Echo. I get that.”

“It’s not for Echo, Clarke. I mean, she is part of the reason, but he takes his role as Lexa’s security seriously. Bellamy and Murphy are kicking themselves for not doing their job well enough. Roan too. He’s torn between coming or staying. I think he should come. He’s important enough that his absence would be noticed, especially if his mother doesn’t show up. But on the other hand, he could probably stop her. It’s a mess.” Her eyes widened slightly. “Speaking of a mess…”

Clarke turned and saw Gustus approaching them.

“I had to stop searching, I’m sorry.” Clarke barely heard him. her focus was on the child beside him.

“Aden.”

“Hello, Clarke.” He looks at her with deep concern on his face.

“What are you doing here? You’re supposed to be in Polis.”

“The Queen of Azgeda came days ago. She kept talking to Titus and it didn’t feel right. Then a few nights ago, he left us. He just…said Lyra would watch us. And he left. He’s the Fleimkepa, he doesn’t ever leave Polis. He never has. But he left…with the Queen. And I just had a bad feeling. So I followed him. I lost him but I kept trying to follow. Gustus found me.”

“We need to find Anya,” Clarke says finally. “I think we know who took Lexa.”

“He took Heda?” Aden looks at her wide-eyed. “He took Heda for the queen? That queen, she wants her dead, right? That’s why she challenged her for solo gomplei.”

“We’ll do everything we can to find her, Aden. Okay? You have to stay here. We’re about to leave.”

“To take the mountain? You’ll be Wanheda again?”

“No, no. Just Clarke.”

“If you’re leaving, who’ll find her, Clarke?”

“We have a very good team out there right now.”

“Okay,” he sighs but he doesn’t meet her eyes.

“Gustus?”

“I’ll stay behind with the boy.”

“Thank you.”

 

****

When the queen of Azgeda showed up at Polis, he was quick to dismiss and threaten her to leave. But then she had told him he needed to hear her piece. And she told him about the nightblood plan about Praimfaya. The blasphemy of it made him freeze and he accused her of lying. Said Heda would never allow it. Then she brought in one of Heda’s guards, Dieran kom Trikru, one he knew was always loyal to his beloved leader. Dieran had told him about the plan. That Praimfaya was coming and the plan was to turn everyone into Nightbloods. Last time they used Luna, but there was no talk of her. They told him that the Commander could be used. They’d take her blood and give it away until there was nothing left. And even if she didn’t, Nia wanted her pretty head on a spike.

Nia had told him that if he got the young Commander out of the way during the war and let her take charge, that she’d spare her. She wouldn’t kill her, wouldn’t drain her blood. She ensured the Flamekeeper that this was how his precious Commander could live. That he’d save her.

It took convincing, but he soon believed her.

He was pacing the length of one of the rooms when Nia entered the room, sticking her knife into its sheath. Titus stared at her, eyes flitting down to the blood on her hand. Black blood. He strides to her, rage bubbling in his chest. “You swore to me you wouldn’t harm her!” he yells at her.

“No. I swore I wouldn’t kill her. And I haven’t. Yet.”

“You swore the sacred oath!”

“You are a naïve man, Fleimkepa. The sacred blood will no longer be sacred, so why should the sacred oath? And after this, after their beloved Heda left them on their own to fight the mountain, the clans will turn on her. They’ll want her head. They’ll beg me to kill her, to get justice. I will take great pleasure in kneeling that child down in front of the clans and taking her head publicly. First though, we will need her blood for the future. I have guards ready to take the Skaikru’s healer at my command. Which I was pleasantly surprised to discover that the healer was Klark kom Skaikru’s mother. The Skaikru healer will have a part in killing her daughter’s lover.”

“I won’t allow this to happen!”

“You have no choice. You were a fool and delivered her right to me. All these years waiting to kill that girl and I finally get to…thanks to you, Fleimkepa.” She nods to the guards that keep him at bay as she leaves, closing the door behind her.

****

The warriors broke through the woods and the door to the mountain was in view. Clarke wouldn’t be lying if she said she was terrified of being in front of the army with Anya, Indra, and Octavia.

It was unnerving being up front where the gunmen could see if they were even there. She had no idea if there even were gunmen ready. She didn’t know if the battle inside the mountain happened yet. Maya had told them they were preparing, but they hadn’t heard from her since the day before.

“Get the shields up here!” Anya calls back.

Those with the shields that shielded the front and top of the first group scurried up to them. they moved towards the door, carefully and quietly.

“You think there’s gunners out here, yet?” Clarke whispers to Anya.

Before the warrior could respond, the shattering sound of a gun echoed and a bullet pierced through Fid’s head.

“War is here!”

The Skaikru and grounders with guns fired in the direction.

“Raven!” Clarke yells. “Monty! We need to get to the doors for when the generators go!”

“How do we know Jenna and Liam succeeded? They’re radio silence.”

“We just hope,” Monty says, looking at Harper who was firing her gun. “We need to win this and we need to win it right,” this time he glances at Jasper who was between Harper and Monroe.

Anya faces the small group. “Let’s get you th—” she’s cut off as the bullet tears through her, blood splattering onto Clarke.

“Anya!” Clarke screams. Octavia grabs her, pulling her back barely in time. bullets whiz past them and Octavia drags her towards the door, Monty, and Raven on their heels. Lincoln half carries, half drags Clarke away when she tries t pull out of Octavia’s grip.

“Keep your head in the game, Clarke! For Lexa. Do this for Lexa.”

“For Lexa,” she chokes out. “I—okay. Okay,” she chokes out. “For Lexa…”

They barely make it to the door. Clarke spares a look, seeing more people on the ground than she’d like. “We need this door opened, dammit! People are dying!”

“We need to wait. Soon, it’s gotta be soon,” Raven says, staring at the light still shining. “Soon.”

They jump as the door opens. An unfamiliar face greets them. “Hey. I’m Liam. We couldn’t take out the generators but turns out all we had to do was knock out a few guards to open it from here. Come on.”

“Liam? Raven,” Raven introduces herself.

“Great to meet you. I definitely have a ton of questions once we save everyone.”

“Cool. Let’s get to it, then.”

“Let’s go, let’s go!” Octavia yells.

The clans raced forward and flowed through the door. For the first time ever, the army of the twelve clans entered the mountain united.

****

“Bow. Bow down before me. Crown me as the leader of the clans and I’ll let you live. Watching you get on your knees and serve me like a servant girl might satisfy me more than cut you apart limb by limb and put that pretty head on a spike.”

“Do what she says, Lexa,” Titus begs her.

“I will never bow to you. I won’t let you rule my people. You are cruel and heartless and why don’t you just get on with it then!”

“Heda!”

Nia’s knife presses against her cheek, pressure beginning to pierce her skin. “I need you recognizable, not perfect. Maybe I won’t take your blood. Maybe I’ll skin you alive. Your sweet little Natblidas will have enough blood in them to use, more than you do.”

“Don’t touch them!” Lexa yells, hissing as the knife slashes her cheek when she moves. “Don’t you dare touch them. They’re just children!”

“I’ll start with little Madi.” Lexa pales at that. “You thought I didn’t know about the little Natblida you’ve been harboring?”

“Heda, what is she talking about?” Titus questions in horror.

“Your Heda has been here in TonDC, playing house with Klark kom Skaikru and a little Natblida. A little five year old girl who, back before we came back to life, took the flame after Heda’s death when the child was only eleven. She’s hiding a past Commander and who knows how many others know about her. Which means that the child must die regardless after I kill you. Or maybe I’ll kill the child first, make you watch her die. And of course I’ll need to kill Clarke afterwards because she’ll never stop trying to kill me after I kill you and her child.”

“You’re a monster,” Lexa hisses, unable to stop the tear that rolled down her cheek.

“I do what I need to do, child. And what I’ve always needed was your death. You’re a plague, Lexa kom Trikru. Your ideas and weakness has affected the clans. They’ve strayed from our ways. You side with the enemy, handed them Skaikru weapons, plan on sparing mountain men and living in their halls. You plan to turn the sacred blood into a common blood. You do all this and the clans are still loyal! The only way to end your reign is by making the clans turn on you and then I can kill you. You will not be the martyr in this story, Lexa. You will be the traitor nobody will miss.”

“She is the most respected and beloved Heda since Bekka herself!” Titus shouts.

“She was. When I’m done with this child, the clans will be calling for her traitorous head. They’ll call for yours too, Flamekeeper. The flamekeeper who conspired with the Commander to turn against the clans in time of war. Your story is over, Flamekeeper. And Lexa, enjoy your last moments of being Commander. Your legacy is over.”

Nia stepped out of the room and exits the building. She was proud of her work. Happy to be soon rid of the young Commander that ruined her life.

She only made it two steps before an arrow pierces her shoulder, followed by another. She howls in pain and shock. As her knees buckled she saw her guards were already dead.

“In there!”  

Nia’s eyes widen when she sees who shot her. “You…I took you in. I raised you. I gave you a purpose! And now you’ll repay the favor by killing me?”

“I’m not going to kill you,” Echo says, standing over her. “That’s for Heda and Clarke to do. And you didn’t do me any favors, Nia,” she spits out the name. “You tortured and manipulated me and hurt me. When I was a child you forced my closest friend to kill me, and when I killed her you made me take her name, her title. You deserve all the pain you will receive. Take her,” she orders. Two of the Commanders guards haul her up and tie her up.

She heads into the building to find Titus looking at Ontari in disgust and the young girl shot back a nasty look back. “Don’t untie him,” Echo snaps.

“I wasn’t intending to,” Ontari assures her. “Last time you killed her. This time you kidnap her and let Nia torture her. How close was she to dying because of you again?”

“Says the girl who killed all of the Natblidas!”

“I’m trying to change! You clearly aren’t, you worm.”

“Ontari,” Echo warns. “Calm. Down.”

Echo’s gaze shifts to the Commander who Gustus was lifting upright. “Is she okay?” Echo asks with concern lacing her tone.

“She’s hurt,” Gustus says quietly and in worry.

“I’m fine,” Lexa says, leaning against her protector. “The army? Did they march?”

“They left at first light,” Echo tells her.

“Clarke?”

“She went with Anya and Indra,” Gustus informs her.

“Madi?”

“With Abby, she’s safe.”

“I need to get to the mountain. I need to see this through.”

“You’re in no condition to go out there, Heda. It’ll be a battlefield.”

Nia’s words ring in her ears. “They’re my people, Gustus. They need me there. I don’t need to fight. They just need to see me, to know I didn’t abandon them. They need my strength. Clarke needs my strength. Please.”

“We’ll get her there safe.” They look up at the new voice. Bellamy. Roan.

“You take care of the kids and my mother. We’ll take care of the Commander. Get her there safe, keep her safe.”

“Kids?” Lexa frowns.

“Aden followed him. He was scared for you,” Gustus growls and Lexa spares Titus a look. He looks horrified at the realization that Aden had been in danger, too.

“Aden’s here?” Lexa asks in horror.

“He’s safe, with Madi.”

“Keep him safe,” she tells Gustus, stepping over to the other two men. “They’ll keep me safe.”

“The fastest horses we have are ready. We’ll get there fast, we should go now.”

****

“I’m running low on bullets!” Clarke yells.

When they arrived in the mountain, it was a blood bath. They told the civilians to stay in their rooms and they fought the soldiers. And then the resistance in the mountain joined to help, including Maya. It had been going on for what felt like forever and they knew it was far from over.

“Me too!” Raven responds, her voice strained. “We need to reload.”

“What we need to do is move to a better location,” Octavia says, “we're too exposed here!”  

“Go! I'll cover you!” Clarke yells.

The other three move run for better cover. Before Clarke can follow, they're cut off by a mount weather soldier. He fires at Clark and she ducks behind the wall. She fires back at him, one bullet, two, and then she's out. She hears the clicking of either Octavia or Raven’s guns. They were all out.

Clarke prepares to be shot like Lexa I was before, like Anya was before they entered. She thinks about Madi, about Lexa. Thinks about how Madi will react to losing them both, Lexa and if she was ever found. She hopes they find her, Madi needs her.

She's prepared.                                                                                                       

And then a spear slices through the air, embedding itself into the soldier’s chest. Clarke spins around and drops her empty gun. She's running and she skids to a halt, arms being thrown tightly around Lexa. “Oh my God. You're here, you’re okay.” Lexa flinches and Clarke notices the slash on her face and looks her over. “Oh my god, you’re hurt.”

“Clarke, check her over later. We are literally in the middle of a battlefield!” Raven calls.

“I’m okay,” Lexa breathes. “Let’s go win this. Let’s go save us all.”

Notes:

Next chapter: we finally see the war of the mountain

Chapter 26: Until the Battle is Won

Notes:

I feel like the first half of this is good but the last half feels kind of rushed/lacking detail. I've been working on this for almost a week and I've had no proper sleep in days so I'm just exhausted both physically, emotionally and mentally so I apologize if it's not as satisfying to read as anyone hoped.

The walls of the mountain had been painted red, blood pooling in puddles on the floor. The amount of soldiers in the mountain was overwhelming, but the coalition having guns themselves evened the odds.

“Jenna, hold up!” Maya grabs her friend’s wrist when she tries to pop up from their hiding spot.

“I heard Liam!” Jenna hisses.

“You don’t know if it’s Liam!”

“I know my brother’s voice,” Jenna insists. “Maya, this is it. This is what we’ve been waiting for. What you and your father created the revolution for!”

“Jenna, they said anyone who wishes peace to stay in the rooms. We can’t go out there.”

“They know you! This is our time. This is our moment. You want to change the world? We’re the future, Maya. Your dad and the other adults are out there fighting with the Outsiders right now and all we did was duck out when things got bad. Why not us? You—you said you wished you’d have done more last time. This time we can. Do it with me. For you, for me, for Liam and for Lucy and Zachary. For your dad, for Margaret.”

“For me?” the two swing around to see the face peeking out of the vent.

“Lucy!” Jenna exclaims. She frowns. “Is Zach in there too?”

“No,” comes Zachary’s little voice.

“Zachary Michael Blake!” Jenna scolds her little brother. “You are eight years old! You’re supposed to be hiding in your closet, not crawling through the vents with Lucy!”

“Still want to go out there, Jen? Cause it’s now or never. And you’re right—I need to do more, do better than before.” Maya asks.

“Well, they won’t shoot us if we have two little kids with us, right?”

While the two second graders should have been filled with fear over that prospect, they had shared excited looks. Jenna and Maya figure that maybe it was best they were born bold and adventurous. That was needed for the world to come.

****

The rapid gunfire sounded down the halls. Clarke peeked around the corner, pulling back as a bullet ricocheted right beside her. She was pinned there with Lexa, Raven, Octavia, and Jasper. The blood droplets on the floor that dripped off of Lexa worried her as much as the soldiers firing at them did.

“Take a break,” Raven orders and swaps places with Clarke. “It won’t be long until Bellamy and Roan fight their way back to us.” They had been separated. Jasper, Monty, and Harper were separated from them too.

Raven was fresh troops and starts firing her gun around the corner. She’s satisfied when she hears a body drop. She ducks away as they shoot back. “We’re going t be pinned here until someone runs out of bullets!”

“If we run out first?” Clarke asks, already dreading the answer.

“Then we’re dead.”

“Great. We’re like, scarily low,” Octavia says. “At least I am.”

“Me, too,” Clarke admits. “We just hope they have less.”

“They can get more,” Raven says. “We’re pinned down, they aren’t. They have friends.”

“Raven! Any other comforting thoughts you’d like to share?!” Clarke’s voice raises an octave and Lexa giving her hand a squeeze does little to calm her nerves.

“Clarke.” Her voice is off and Clarke looks at her with a frown. She presses the back of her hand to her clammy forehead. She expected her to feel like she was burning up but instead she felt cold.

“We need to get out of here. Now,” Clarke says desperately.

“Clarke. We’re pinned down!” Raven says as if it was obvious.

“She’s losing too much blood!”

“You’re a damn doctor! Treat her here. We have plenty of time right now.”

“Here.” Octavia takes a layer off, ripping it into strips for bandages.

“Thank you,” she tells her, helping Lexa down. She pulls her jacket off and folds it, easing Lexa backwards to lay down, using her jacket as a pillow. She pushes her shirt up to reveal an oozing wound on her side. “God, Lexa. You’ve been running around with this?”

She slips into Trig which further concerned Clarke. She was breathless and a little sluggish and her native tongue was easiest for her. “There was no time to see Nyko. I had to get here. You’d be dead if I had shown up just seconds later, Klark.”

“If we don’t get proper medicine, you could die, Lexa!”

“Would be worth it. It’d always be worth it.”

“Don’t you dare say that.”

“Klark. I’ll be alright. I’ve survived worse. Just do what you can. You heard Raven—Bellamy and Roan will find us.”

Clarke nods wordlessly, swiping at her cheeks. The stress and the fear was catching up to her. Octavia hands her a canteen and Clarke doesn’t even question where it came from. She pours the water onto the wound to clean it and wipes at it. Lexa grits her teeth to hold back a cry of pain. “I’m sorry,” Clarke says as she puts pressure on the wound. This time Lexa does cry out. A few tears escape and Clarke whispers apologies over and over again. She wraps a ling strip around her waist, tying it around the makeshift bandage. “All done.”

Lexa lets out a shuddering breath and nods. “I think…that…hurt worse…than get…getting stabbed…by Nia.”

“Sorry,” Clarke winces.

“At least we didn’t have fire,” Octavia tells her. “If we did, she’d have burnt it closed and speaking from experience, that really fucking hurts.”

Lexa chuckles then winces. “Ow.”

“Guys?” Raven breaks the moment, eyes wide. “They’re coming our way.”

“Crap,” Octavia moves towards her readying her gun. “Clarke!”

Before Clarke to react, the sound of rapid gunfire sounded but no bullets came their way. “Bellamy!” Octavia yells going around the corner once the sound ceased. She runs into her brother’s arms and Raven follows suit.

“Roan!” Clarke calls when the king peers around the corner.

“Was she shot?” he asks, looking at the Commander on the ground.

“No. Your mother happened, though.”

“I know. We stopped my mother and then Bellamy and I got Lexa here.” He sees Clarke shooting him an angry look. “She was coming one way or another, Clarke. Figured making sure she got here in one peace was the best option.”

“I’ll yell at all of you later.” She directs the comment to Lexa who’s pushing herself upright with an apologetic look at Roan. “Help her.”

“Do not carry me,” Lexa warns lowly and the king gives one short nod.

“If we need to run, I will,” he warns.

“No.”

“Lexa,” Clarke gives her a look that makes the Commander’s shoulders slump. “You’re only human and you lost a lot of blood. You will put your pride aside for a short time and let him help you. I can almost guarantee the clans would rather see you carried after being wounded over seeing your body being carried out because you let yourself die for your pride.”

“Fine,” she mumbles. “But only if we need to run.”

“Good.”

The three made their way over to the other three. The group made their way down a hall that led to another. They rounded the corner and narrowly avoided firing at their friends. Monty, Harper, Miller, Jasper, and Liam.

“Oh thank god!” Harper breathes. “We thought you were dead.”

“Have you seen Lincoln or Indra?” Octavia asks with hope in her voice. After they were fired at when they approached, many of them were separated. Octavia didn’t even know if her lover or mentor made it inside.

“I saw Lincoln,” Monty tells her. “We split. He went with some of the other warriors. Haven’t seen them since but he’s strong. Indra never came in. After Anya went down she stayed behind to pull her off the battlefield.”

“Anya was shot?” It was Lexa this time, concern thick in her voice.

“Yeah. I’m not sure where, just that she went down.”

“Is she alive?” Clarke asks.

“Lincoln didn’t know.”

“I hope so,” Raven says which surprises the others. “What? She was starting to grow on me.”

“Come on,” Miller urges, “we need to find the others. And we need to win this battle. This is our one and only shot.”

“He’s right,” Lexa swallows.

“Let’s go.”

****

“Maya! Slow down!” Jenna yells, pulling Lucy and Zachary with her.

“I heard my dad yell, Jenna!” Maya yells.

“Maya!” Lucy whines. “I’m tired!”

Maya slows a fraction for them to catch up better but keeps moving forward. She rounds the corner and freezes. “Dad!”

“Stay there, Maya!” Vincent yells.

Maya’s eyes drifts to the puddle of blood on the floor. Alex was dead. Alex who dismantled the missile, Alex who told Jenna how to disable the fog, Alex who saved them all. And there were other resistance members dead along with mountain soldiers. It was a blood bath and both sides of that shooting had died. “Dad?” Maya notices that he’s not moving. “Dad! Were you shot?!”

“It’s not bad, Maya. The bleeding is slowing. I don’t know if there’s anyone else coming and I’d only slow you down, kiddo. I need you to keep moving and you’ll find me after.”

“Dad,” she cries, “no. Not again.”

“Maya. I'm okay. I'm going to be fine. But I need you to take over for now. I need to be able to count on you. The resistance needs you.”

“Okay. I won’t let you down.”

“You never let me down, My.”

They tense up when they hear approaching footsteps. Vincent waves them away but Jenna refuses when she hears a familiar voice. All caution goes out the window when she screams, “Liam!”

“Jenna!” Maya grabs her friends arm and tugs. “Anyone could have heard that!”

“My brother!”

The footsteps quickened and a group rounded the corner. “Jenna!” Liam shouts, running towards his sister with elation on his face. He notices their youngest sibling and his step pauses. “Zach?”

A shot rings out and blood trickles down Liam’s face where the bullet was embedded. He falls down, dead. Zachary’s scream fills the hall. Maya grabs him, grabbing Jenna’s arm. “Jenna!” All she can do is stare in horror at her brother’s body. Jasper runs over to them and he grabs Jenna’s arm and helps Maya lead her away.

“Who shot that?” Raven asks.

“I don’t care who, we need to follow them!” Harper yells, pointing where Jasper and Maya were going. “Come on.”

“Harper’s right. We need to—” Monty is cut off by another shot. He stares in horror as Harper’s shirt begins to turn red. “Harper!”

Miller presses his hands to his friend’s shoulder and apologizes when she winces. “Sorry, Harper. Need to stop this.”

“I can,” she pants, pressing her own hand to staunch the flow shakily. “We need to go!”

“Roan?” Clarke says, looking at him with wide blue eyes.

He nods. “Sorry, Heda.” Lexa doesn’t even protest when she’s lifted up by the king. None of them do.

****

The sound of gunfire was fewer in less between. Clarke knew one side was winning and the other was dying. She hoped the mountain men that fought them were dying and the coalition was thriving. She hoped it wouldn’t come to the extinction of one of the other.

She was with Bellamy, Octavia, Raven, Miller and Jasper and Maya.

Maya had led them to a door that held the resistance’s headquarters where a sweet woman named Barbara let them in. a handful of people were inside waiting—all the able bodied adults were out there, either fighting or dead already. The bullet wasn’t through and through and the closest thing they had to a doctor was afraid to try to remove it. One scream and it was game over. So she stopped the bleeding and bandaged it for the time being. Monty stayed with her. The doctor had looked Lexa over, assuring Clarke that she’d do her best to keep her comfortable much like Harper until the battle was won and one look from Clarke was all it took for Roan to stay with her. Maya had been reluctant to leave Jenna and especially Zachary but Jenna was mumbled through her sobs that she promised her father. So she left, after she made Lucy swear not to follow.

“Do you think we’re winning?” Jasper asks quietly.

“We have to be,” Clarke mutters. “We didn’t go through all this to do better just to die.”

“No matter what happens, we did to better,” Maya assures her. “We are better.”

“We’re in this together. We’re a team,” Raven says. “Now let’s go finish this. For Anya, for Indra, for Lexa and Harper. Monty and Roan.”

“My dad,” Maya adds, “and Alex and Liam. Jenna, Zachary, Lucy. For them all, for both of our people.”

“We’re all one people,” Octavia says, “a coalition, united as one.”

“For our people.”

The small group moved through the halls. It was getting quiet. Too quiet.

“Where’s my daughter, Maya?”

The group swung around. Clarke raised her gun, finger on the trigger. He had his gun pointed at them. And he wasn’t alone. “Carl Emerson, Mount Weather Security Detail.”

“Hello, Clarke,” he sneers. “Where is my daughter, Maya?”

“What is he talking about?” Jasper asks his girlfriend.

“My daughter. Isaac saw her with you after he killed the oldest Blake boy. Such a shame, he had so much potential. I’ll ask you once more: where is she?”

“Lucy chose to be with us!” Maya shouts.

“Lucy?!” her group looks at her. Clarke’s eyes flicker to Emerson and she sees the resemblance he has to the little girl. Her hair was lighter than his, more blonde than brown, but she had the same blue eyes. But Lucy’s was full of light and innocence while his was full of cold hatred. And she had similar features, but she missed it because he was full of hatred and revenge while the little girl reminded her of Madi.

“You filled my daughter’s head with all that crap! You brainwashed my little girl!”

“No. Lucy heard you talking about killing people and wanting to eradicate everyone but the residents in here! Heard you threaten my dad and my life! You scared her and she came to Jenna and then me. Did you forget that Lucy and Zachary have been best friends since birth? And Zach’s older sister has been my best friend since birth? You turned your own daughter against you.”

“Aaron?” he looks at the boy beside him. “You hear that. They’re accusing your baby sister of treason all on her own.”

“Who do you think got Lucy in and out?” the boy says as he walks past his father to stand in front of him. “You’re crazy. You lost your mind. Mom knew it. She said it and then the next day she was gone. You made mom disappear. We knew who deserved to win. Lucy always liked playing in the vents. Mom was always worried about one thing or another and you were always busy so she had to get creative. I couldn’t find her one day and I went into the vents, happened upon Alex and Liam talking. Talked to Lucy who confirmed it. We’re a part of the resistance, dad.”

Emerson looks at the boy in shock. And Clarke took her chance. She aimed her gun and fired. The bullet piercing through Emerson’s head was satisfying but at the same time, she also wished that she could have gotten more for all the pain and carnage he had cost. But he was dead, and Cage was all that was left.

“Where’s Lucy?” comes Aaron’s croak.

“Headquarters,” Maya tells him softly. “I’m sorry, Aaron.”

“Don’t be. He stopped being my dad the day we all died before.” There’s no malice in his voice. If he knew that their deaths before turned his dad into a monster, maybe he would be. But he knew his dad had done awful things before, he had just been good at hiding it before. Aaron wasn’t blind, neither was Lucy. It didn’t make the pin of being an orphan and less though.

“Stay with us,” Maya pleads.

“Kill Cage. We won’t be free until he’s dead.” With that, Aaron turned and fled.

“Why do I feel that that’ll be easier said than done?” Octavia sighs.

“It will be,” Maya sighs, “if anyone has security measures, it’s him.”

****

Maya was right.

Cage had security guarding his door really well.

It was Raven’s idea to toss the gas grenade. She said it was easier to gas them now and kill while down than to start shooting and no one could argue that. So they threw the gas and it knocked out the guards.

“This feels too easy,” Miller murmurs.

“Be ready,” Clarke warns her friends. “We have no idea what we’re walking into.”

The door opens before they can approach and shots begin to fire. Five guards file out and they fire at them.

“Miller!” Raven yells when he goes down and she can’t tell where he was shot as she ducks behind a wall. “Where’s O?!” she yells. everyone is accounted for besides the young warrior. “Octavia!”

“Did she go inside?” Jasper yells, wincing as Maya ties a makeshift bandage around the bullet hole in his leg. “Where’s Miller?”

“Down,” Raven gestures her head to where he is.

“Was he shot?”

“I think so. Why aren’t they shooting anymore?”

“They’re dead,” is Clarke’s reply. The other poke their heads out to see the soldiers on the ground. The culprit stands above them. They expected Octavia but it is not her.

“Where is Octavia?” Lincoln asks.

“I think she went in there?” Clarke points to Cage’s door shakily. She picks up the pace and runs into the room with her weapon raised. She sees the other guards on the floor dead, throats slit courtesy of Octavia. And she sees Octavia on her knees with raised hands, Cage’s gun pointed at her head.

“Hello, Clarke,” Cage says, “I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Let her go.”

“You speak as if you have any leverage. I want you dead. And her dead. And your girlfriend dead.”

“Well you’re not getting any of that!” Octavia growls and Clarke hisses at her to shush.

“Where’s your father?”

“Dead.”

“I don’t believe you,” Clarke shakes her head.

“After what you did last time…he didn’t want revenge but he was plagued by the guilt. You know how it feels? To walk into your father’s study and finding his body? What losing a parent like that is like?!”

“Actually, yeah, I do,” Clarke says coldly.

“Did your father kill himself, Clarke?”

“He died because he wanted to save everyone. He was executed trying to warn our people. He knew he’d be killed but tried to do it anyway. Why don’t you let Octavia go and we can talk about this, huh?”

“No. I want you to watch her die. Then I want you to suffer.”

“We kill your people, your people kill us. When does this end, Cage?”

“With one of us completely dead and it won’t be mine.”

“You’re already losing Cage. Look at your guards! There’s no one here but you. And I have six friends out there, all with guns. If you shoot Octavia, you die anyways.”

“I die even if I don’t kill her, so what’s to stop me from taking both her and you out before they even come running?”

“Your father’s legacy. Give up and stop this war.”

“No.” He moves the gun closer to Octavia’s head and goes to pull the trigger.

Clarke unloads her gun just as Octavia drops, Cage’s bullet narrowly missing her head. She shoots him until her gun is empty, until he’s long dead. She can sense her friends behind her as she unleashes her fury onto the leader’s corpse. For Anya, for Lexa, for Madi.

“Octavia!” Lincoln is pulling her to her feet. “What were you thinking?”

“I thought you might be gone,” she admits.

“So that meant it was okay to go on a suicide mission?!”

“Yes?”

“Don’t ever do that again,” he pulls her into a crushing hug. “Never again.”

“No promises.”

“This woman,” he mutters into her hair.

“Was that is?” Raven asks wearily.

Clarke to the intercom. “We announce Cage’s death. And then yes, I believe that this is it.”

“What about us?” Maya asks.

“Guess it means it’ll be time to call in all our donors. It’s time for us all to go home.”

Chapter 27: No Half Truths

Notes:

I haven't even touched my other fics. I started this chapter right after I posted the war and it's taken me a bit to write. It's not action packed or very heavy but it definitely made me feel things. It's also very long unlike most of the chapters. Most of my chapter are typically between 1k-1.5k words. This aftermath one almost 3.5k words.

Also guys. City of Light. They're going to need to go to Becca's Island most likely. So do we want a quick and probably unrealistic shut down of ALIE courtesy of Raven, Monty and Jenna, do we want to just like pretend ALIE was never rebooted and stayed dead this time unlike the flame, or do we want to venture into that clusterfuck of a storyline?

“Mom! Help her please!”

The first thing Clarke did when they arrived back to camp was run to find her mother. Abby was scheduled to be in TonDC to meet the injured and assess, and the rover they got from the mountain carried them home.

Abby is quick to look the Commander up and down but Lexa shakes her head at her.

“Let her help your friends. Harper needs a surgeon to remove the bullet. Nyko can help me.”

“You need a doctor.”

“She’s right, Clarke. Let Nyko assess her. If she still needs me or Jackson, we can help after we deal with the critical patients.”

“She lost a lot of blood.”

“Nyko can make sure she’s stable. Although I’m not entirely sure how we’d go about giving her blood since she’s a Nightblood but we’ll figure it out. But if she can rest for a few days, it’ll do her good and she might not even need any blood. Get her to Nyko so she can rest.”

Clarke nods and helps Lexa over to Nyko’s tent. “Heda.” The healer is quick to move to the young Commander and helps her onto a cot and searches her for wounds. Clarke pushes her shirt up to show the makeshift bandage. Lexa hisses quietly as Nyko peels the bandage from her wound. “This is not a shot.”

“Nia,” Lexa hisses. “Stabbed me.”

He presses fingers to the reddening around the wound and she flinches. “I can give her something for the pain and to keep her blood for poisoning.” Keep away infection, Clarke corrects in her head. Nyko grabs a pouch and Clarke follows with her eyes, Lexa’s hand in her own. He’s mixing something into a drink and Lexa wrinkles her nose in disgust telling Clarke this wasn’t the first time she’s gotten injured and had an infection brewing. “Drink, Heda.”

“I hate this stuff,” she grumbles but downs the concoction while trying not to gag. “Disgusting.”

“Well you feel yourself,” he chuckles dryly. “You should be fine, Heda, as long as you rest.”

“There is no time to rest,” the Commander argues despite the tiredness she feels deep in her bones.

“The war is over, Heda. We won.” Lexa looks to the doorway of the tent where Indra in entering.

“Indra! You’re okay?”

“I am fine, Heda. I am sorry I did not fight.”

“Lincoln said you didn’t go in because Anya got shot.”

“I needed to help her.”

“Is she…is she alive?”

“She is. Abby said the bullet barely missed her heart. It was a miracle it didn’t do a lot of damage. She won’t be training any time soon but after some rest she will be up and moving again.”

Lexa and Clarke both let out breaths of relief.

“We were both so relieved to hear from Echo that you were found. Not so relieved to hear yu went to battle while already injured.”

“I didn’t get injured any more than I already was,” Lexa points out, “other than losing blood.”

“Because you know, blood isn’t important at all or anything,” Clarke says sarcastically with a sour tone.

“Mockery isn’t the product of a strong mind, Clarke,” Lexa says and the corner of Clarke’s lips twitch at that.

Indra shakes her head at the pair. “Is she going to be alright, Nyko?”

“If she rests,” the healer says. “Bleeding has stopped and clotted. I gave her the tea.” Indra tries not to smirk at that—Lexa had a knack for getting into trouble even as a child and that tea had been a regular for her when she was not much older than Madi.

“There’s two young ones waiting impatiently to see you both.”

“Aden,” Lexa suddenly remembers that her Natblida had followed Titus. “How much does Madi know?”

“About your disappearance?” Clarke asks. “Nothing. With me needing to go to the mountain I didn’t want to scare her any more than she already was.”

“We can talk to them both,” Lexa tells her. “If rest is all I need, can I do it in my own tent?” she asks Nyko.

He looks at Clarke. “You’ll make sure she rests?” Clarke nods. “Then I don’t see why not.”

“Thank you, Nyko.”

Clarke helps her up and the Commander doesn’t even dare to wave her off. She leads her from the tent and towards their own with Indra trailing them. Members of the clan watch but they give them their space. Word of how the Commander’s Fleimkepa had betrayed her, the queen tried to kill her but she survived and was freed and then went to the mountain to help them win despite being injured had spread like wildfire and the clans were more in awe with their commander than they were before. And Clarke—word of how the former great Wanheda chose to save everyone and kept their Heda alive was also spreading. As was the bravery of others, especially Indra’s Skaikru second. Those who looked at her remembering Blodreina looked at her with a little less contempt, some even dropped all animosity.

“You did good, Clarke,” Lexa pants as they arrive to their tent.

“We did good.”

“All I did was managed to get taken. I can’t believe he…I trusted him, Clarke. I wanted to trust him not to hurt us again. I don’t know the full extent of what Nia told him but how could he ever believe that bringing me to her was saving me? She’s wanted me dead since I was just a little girl no older than Aden. He didn’t learn. He still went so far into the extreme to keep me alive and once again I paid the price. This time not with my life but…where do I go from here?”

Clarke wipes the tear that trailed down her lover’s cheek. “One step at a time. Today we rest. Madi and Aden will come and we’ll hold our little Natblida and thank whoever we want that we’re alive. Next we tell them what happened and prepare ourselves for what’s to come. And then…there’s no choice but for Titus to suffer the same fate as the ice queen, is there?”

“There is not,” Indra speaks, “he abducted his Commander and delivered her to the enemy and allowed her to be injured and quite probably would have led to her death. It was treason, and it was all the worst that it was at time of war.” She looks at the distraught Commander and her look softens. “Shall I bring the children in?”

“Can we have some time?” Clarke asks, wrapping her arms around Lexa. “She just needs some time to process.”

“Of course. Whenever you’re both ready.”

****

“You almost died.”

“I know.”

“You can’t do anything like that again. Even if I’m ever actually gone.”

Octavia’s green eyes look at him and the emotion on her face made his heart ache. “I know what it’s like to live a life without you. I can’t do it again, Lincoln. I won’t do it again. I can’t take that pain again. I wouldn’t survive that again.”

“You’re not the same girl you were before.”

“We don’t know that.”

“I know you, Octavia. I can’t live worried that if anything happens to me that you’ll follow me. I want you to live.”

“I was barely surviving. If it hadn’t been for Diyoza and Hope…”

“And they’ll be here in six years if times stay true, won’t they?”

“Just under seven years if they wake the same time. But if the captain they took the bridge from remembers, who knows what will happen. The Diyoza who came down in that ship and the Diyoza I spent ten years with on Skyring were very different people. Nobody but me knew the real her. I hope they come. I want you to meet her. And Hope…Hope won’t remember anything. She’s not even born yet. There’ll be no memory of Skyring, no memory of Auntie O. I’m glad she won’t remember growing up alone after we were taken but I hate she won’t remember her first ten years. We'll remember it but she’s going to be a completely different kid.”

“Maybe different circumstances but she’ll be the same kid, especially if she has the same influences in her life.”

“You really think so?”

“I know so.”

She climbs onto his lap, pressing her lips to his. “Ai hod yu in.”

“Ai hod yu in,” he repeats against her lips.

****

“I’m glad you’re alive.”

The corner on Anya’s lips twitch slightly. The young mechanic sat cross-legged on a chair near her cot, picking at her sleeve.

“It’d have been a tragedy if I got killed by a random bullet again.”

“A real tragedy.” Raven's lips twitch this time.

“Tell me what happened.”

“Didn’t Indra already fill you in?”

“She’s Indra. I want the alive version. Even if you talk way to fast and I don’t understand you half the time.”

“Where should I start?”

“Start with after I went down.”

“Okay. We made it inside and it was seriously guns blazing. Shots fired every direction and I think we all thought we were screwed. It was me, Clarke, Octavia, Monty, Harper, Miller, and this dude Liam. Liam’s running around in a hazmat suit because radiation but we closed the door and he shed it real fast. With the guns and ducking out and everything we got separated. Me, Clarke and Octavia were by ourselves and we didn’t even know if the others were alive. We had hope. But we were running low and didn’t have a chance to reload. We were screwed. Then a spear appears and hit the guard so hard he went flying. It was epic. Lexa has amazing aim even hurt and tired. So she, Bellamy and Roan come in and they save our asses. Literally. And then somehow we lose the guys! They had one job—keep the Commander alive. Well they left it up to us. We’re pinned down, she’s bleeding all over the place, we’re taking turns on shooting around the corner when I remind Clarke that she’s a freaking doctor and to calm her ass down and take care of her girl before she bleeds to death. So Clarke and O patch her up, we pretty much run out of bullets again and bam! Bellamy and Roan to the rescue.”

“You guys needed a lot of rescuing.”

“We did our fair share of rescuing, trust me.”

“Okay…continue.”

“So we get our asses out of there. Clarke wants Roan to carry Lexa, Lexa makes it clear ain’t nobody carrying her unless it’s absolutely necessary and Roan is too scared of her to argue. We round a corner and there’s Harper, Monty, Jasper, Miller and Liam. And then we’re moving again. It’s quiet then it’s loud then it’s quiet again. And we hear a girl yell and Liam books it. We find Maya and some redhead girl our age and of course she’s Liam's sister cause they both have really red hair. And there’s this adorable little boy who’s also this super redhead. And a cute little blonde girl not much older than Madi. And the kicker? Little blondie and her older brother was the big bad’s second in command’s kids. The man in charge of a lot of this carnage, his kids were working with the rebels in the mountain. He was bad but his kids, despite being so young knew he was bad and wasn’t going to change so they made the choice to be good even if it meant their father’s death. The older one, he was like maybe eleven or twelve, watched his father die and then all he cared about was finding his little sister. It was both incredibly sad yet moving at the same time.”

“That was a very mature decision for those children.”

“Yeah,” Raven nods. “After Emerson’s death, all that was left was Cage.”

“The one who was fully in charge?”

“Yeah, him. We get to him and I have the grand idea to throw smoke grenades to knock their asses out. Miller gets shot, they’re shooting at us, and Octavia disappears. She didn’t know where Lincoln was so she went on a suicide mission to stop Cage. He had her down and a gun to her head. He was about to kill her when Clarke unloaded her gun into him. Lincoln was not happy that Octavia was willing to sacrifice her life just because she thought he could be dead.”

“Sounds familiar,” Anya says, thinking of Clarke ready to self-combust and throw the mission away because Lexa was missing.

“Love makes some people willing to do anything.”

“Have you ever had something like that?”

Raven hesitates. She was not prepared for that question to come from Anya of all people. “I thought I did.”

“What happened?”

“Last time he came to the ground with the others. I followed just almost two weeks later and he was already sleeping with someone else. I’ve forgiven him but I don’t think I’ll ever forget that.”

“Nobody truly forgets a heartbreak like that.”

“What about you? Have you ever been in love?”

“No,” the warrior grimaces. “That was never an option.”

“It wasn’t an option for Lexa either, was it?”

“I suppose not.” She shifts and clears her throat. “Your friends who were shot? Will they be okay?”

“Harper will be. Bed rest for a little and she’ll be up and about kicking our asses before we know it. Miller isn’t out of the woods yet. It was a pretty bad shot. One of the mountain people who helped us, his name is Vincent. Maya who we talked to on the radio? He’s her dad. He’s in rough shape but we think he’ll pull through.”

“And the Mountain Men walk amongst us.”

“The ones who’ve surrendered and joined us. There were kids. Three of them who risked their lives every day since this restart for this. Two of them are only eight years old.”

“How are your people feeling after giving their…”

“Marrow? Sore but they’ll be fine.”

“You didn’t do it.”

“Yeah, I have some seriously bad memories from that drill.” Anya gives a questioning look. “Back before…I was crippled. This leg,” she rubs her leg, still not fully used to the sensation of feeling, “was paralyzed. I couldn’t feel anything below the knee and I had a metal brace so I could walk. During the mountain war back then they drilled into my hip without anything to numb it and the part of my leg I could feel was just in chronic pain. My life for years was being in pain nonstop every day with no relief. I hated it so much.”

“I’m sorry,” is all Anya can muster. “That must have been awful.”

Raven shrugs it away, trying to shake away the feeling that haunted her. “Anyways, me and the others who suffered that stuff opted out of donated for mental health reasons. Did Abby give you good meds for the pain?”

Anya motions at a cup that has some pills in it. Raven gives her a disapproving look. “You’re supposed to swallow them. They won’t help you if you don’t take them.”

“I don’t need mountain medicine.”

“You’re such a stubborn ass.” Anya glowers at her. “Take the pills or I’ll go tell Lexa or Indra that you won’t listen to the doctor.” Anya’s cold look turns colder and Raven almost fear for her life. But then the warrior pops the pills in her mouth and swallows them down with a cup of water and shudders.

“Disgusting.”

“Couldn’t agree more,” Raven chuckles. “Thank you for taking those.”

“Hm. Don’t you have anywhere to be?”

“No…do you want me to leave?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

****

“Heda!”

“Gentle, Aden,” Clarke reminds the boy with a wince as he practically tackles Lexa into a big hug.

“Let me go!” Madi complains, trying to pull her hand from Clarke’s.

“One at a time,” Clarke tells the youngster. “You haven’t seen her in days. Aden hasn’t seen her in weeks.”

Madi stops fighting Clarke’s hold but she settles a glare at Aden. Jealously coursed through her as she watches Lexa hug the boy close just like how she held her. The older, mature part of Madi that remembered being a young teen reminds herself that Lexa had Aden first, that the Commander had a big enough heart to love more than one child, that once they went to Polis there’d be a whole class of Natblida’s fighting for their Commander’s attention but that didn’t mean she’d be sidelined. But the five year old part of her didn’t care and all she saw was competition for the attention she's had all to herself for weeks. The young part of her couldn’t help but think that Clarke and Lexa were hers. They were her family. The young and old part of her could almost forget that in this life, her actual mother was alive when she looked at the two women in front of her.

“Madi.” Lexa’s gentle voice brought her out of her thoughts. She sees Lexa’s look of concern and Aden looking at the floor, shifting his feet. He almost looked like he felt bad for inserting himself into their little family. “Come here.”

Clarke lets her go and she trudges over to Lexa. Clarke trails after her. “I don’t like that.”

“Like what?” Lexa presses.

“That I have to share,” she glances at Aden as she says that. “I’ve never had to share before.”

“I can teach you,” Aden says quietly, raising his eyes from the ground. Working with younger Natblidas was like second nature to the boy. He was the oldest in his class and looking out for the new novitiates was his job. She wasn’t part of his class and she wasn’t a novitiate but the offer came naturally to him.

“Can you train with me, too?” Madi blurts out, the idea of training with another child and another nightblood was appealing to her, even if she was jealous of him at least a little.

Aden looks at Lexa for permission and Madi frowns slightly. Aden looked at her like he wished she was a parent to him but he acted like she was his teacher and ruler. Madi knew she was their Commander but she never really fell into the behavior of acting like it. Lexa nods to him with a soft smile and he returns it. “Okay.”

“Okay. You train with me and I’ll share my parents.”

“Madi, we aren’t—” Lex starts but cuts off from a look from the youngster. She looks between them with big blue eyes and she doesn’t budge and neither have the strength to argue with her. She has a mother out there a few clans away but the child was more than certain about who she wanted.

“I know I can’t say it out loud outside the tent. I know. But in here I can.”

“Actually about secrets…” Lexa glances at Clarke and then to Madi. “Nia knows exactly who you are, Madi. I know we wanted to hide you in plain sight, but I think it’s now time that we tell everyone who you are and what you were.”

“That I’m a Nightblood and was your successor,” Madi nods in acceptance but curiosity won over and starts what she says next carefully. “Wonkru knows Clarke was like my mom. She made it clear that I was her kid last time and stopped at nothing to keep me safe. And it’s no secret that you two are together. I’ve heard whisperings wondering if the great Lexa kom Trikru will be the first Heda to ever be bonded. So Clarke’s kid is your kid. We’re a family. Do we have to hide that?”

“Madi, the danger,” Clarke says softly.

“Am I really in any more danger than I already am? I’m associated with the two of you anyways. If they need to know I’m a Natblida, they should know exactly who they’re messing with if they ever try to hurt me. You kept me safe all on your own last time. Sure we had some help but it was you, even if sometimes you overreacted.” Clarke looked down, remembering exactly what she was talking about. There are no good guys. Immediately labeling Octavia the bad guy. Taking her far from Polis without a thought nd leaving Bellamy and the others in the pit. The shock collar. Joining McCreary. "I forgave you long ago for that. But now? You, Lexa, Octavia, Lincoln, Indra, Anya, Echo, Bellamy, Raven, all the others who would do anything for us. We have a whole village around us. I'm well protected! And if you just say I'm at Natblida under protection and anyone from Wonkru who knows you raised me last time says something they'll know you lied and that could be bad."

“She’s right, Heda,” Aden offers. “No half-truths. Just the full truth.”

Clarke and Lexa share a look for a moment, communicating silently in a way that both children were always in awe of. “Okay,” Clarke answers. “No half-truths. The full truth no matter what. And then…”

“The queen will be dead,” Lexa finishes with finality and coldness, “and long live the king.”

Chapter 28: Execution

Notes:

The second half of this chapter is a bit heavy (chapter title tells you why) and it is heavy with Lexa+feelings

also I only got a handful of responses last chapter so putting it here again: do we want the ALIE storyline or not really? And of so, how are we feeling about doing it? I can barely rewatch the second half of S3 because of that storyline so I need ideas here definitely

“Are you ready?” Clarke asks Madi. “Once we do this, there is no going back.”

She nods. “I don’t want to keep lying and hiding for the rest of my life,” she glances at Lexa and frowns. “Is she ready?”

“Hey, Lex?” Lexa doesn’t respond and Clarke helps Madi up. “Just give her a minute.”

“She’s talking to the past Commanders,” Madi tells her. “I did that, too. That’s how Sheidheda got me. He took advantage and I was so hurt after what happened to you that I listened to him and then his power got too strong for me to fight when I realized what I had done.”

“He won’t ever be a problem for anyone again.” They glance over as Lexa’s eyes open. “He’s gone.”

“Good,” Madi nods, swallowing. “Are you ready for after?”

“I have to be.”

“You don’t.”

“I can’t show weakness today. You know, he’s now killed me and betrayed me. But it still hurts, knowing that he must meet the same fate as Nia. I’ve known him since I was a little girl. He was a good teacher before, you know. He meant a lot to me. I just wished that he learned from his mistakes. But he’s shown me that the man he’s become won’t change. Gustus betrayed me but he hurt himself to try to protect me. Titus, he…he killed me,” her voice breaks, “trying to kill you. And here again. An Azgeda warrior came at us. Jorum put himself in front of me to protect and he died. Titus showed up and he killed the warrior. He told me he needed me to go with him. I wanted to go find you and he was adamant he needed me safe. Said a Trikru warrior was already on his way to get you and warn Anya. I believed him. I followed him. He led me right to where Azgeda warriors were waiting and someone hit me in the back of my head. When I woke up, I thought we had been ambushed but he was there, unbound, unharmed. I was tied to a chair. He said he was sorry but that was how he would save me. He was wrong. Nia had every intention to kill me…and Madi,” her eyes shift to the child who gasps lightly. “The best way we protect her is by being honest. We don’t know how many people Nia told and the truth will come out one way or another. We’re honest now and it can’t be used against us in the future. The best way to protect us all is with their deaths. Titus has to die, and I have to be present. I have to finish it. It is my duty as Commander.”

Clarke takes her hand. “You have us.”

Lexa wraps her arms around her and holds her close. “I know. I love you.”

“I love you,” Clarke breathes. “And you,” she chuckles as Madi climbs up to throw her arms around them.

“I love you both. You’re who I want forever.”

****

The gathering wasn’t large. It was the leaders and generals of each clan. The important people. Indra was present though they had successfully convinced Anya to stay in her tent and rest. Indra swore she’d update her fellow warrior when it was all over. Anya had been adamant that if she was resting during the meeting that she’d be present for the execution—she would not miss watching the ice queen finally die.

There was about twenty-five of them and they watched their great Commander, the former great Wanheda and the young child.

“How many of you were in the bunker after Praimfaya?” Clarke asks to start. It’d be easiest to explain if some already knew Madi from before. She’s surprised when twenty of them raised hands up, though she guesses she shouldn’t be—it made sense that leaders, war generals and ambassadors made the list for each clan. “How many survived inside the bunker and made it out?” She’s pleasantly surprised when only two hands lowered. Eighteen out of twenty-five made it to meet Madi before.

“Is these questions because of the child?” the Trikru ambassador asks.

“It is,” it’s Lexa who confirms. “Before the execution, we decided that we should be honest now that the mountain war has been won. Everyone deserves to know the truth.”

“Which is?” the Azgeda general glances at his king then back to his Commander. His look tells the two woman that he did not know anything from Nia, and his look to Roan told them his loyalty was to his new King.

“I didn’t turn Madi into a Nightblood. She was born that way.”

It was eerily quiet for a moment before the Trikru ambassador dropped his shoulders in relief. “That’s the big truth? Was it known knowledge that she was created? One day she was just some kid that followed you around and next she was Heda. I thought the whole time she was a born Natblida.” There’s a murmur of agreement throughout the room.

Madi looks up at Clarke. “We told Octavia that you created me. No one else but Gaia. I guess Octavia decided to just keep the fact I’m a Natblida a mostly secret. And anyone she told was sworn to secrecy.”

“She did,” the Trishanakru ambassador responds. “I was there as a guard when they did the oath when she told Octavia her truth. We were sworn to keep the secret both for Blodreina and the child’s safety.”

Lexa takes a steadying breath. “This is no longer a secret. Let it be known…carefully… that Madi is a Natblida. She is under our protection. She is not a pawn, a weapon or in training to be the next Commander. She is our child under our protection and just happens to have the blood. Because in a few months the blood won’t matter as most of you know.”

“We swore our loyalty to our Commander. The child is included,” the Trikru ambassador says, bowing.

Soon, the rest of the clans had bowed one by one, swearing fealty to their Commander, her lover and their Natblida child.

****

“That went really good,” Madi says carefully, taking a bite of her lunch. Her eyes look from Clarke to Lexa and she has a small smile. “You called me your child.”

Lexa kneels in front of Madi. “I did. But Madi…you’re mother is still out there, alive. What about her?”

“I love my mom, but I barely remember her. Before, when I thought of her all I could remember was her dying in my arms. It’s always Clarke I think of. And you.”

“You’ve known me a few months.”

“I knew you in the flame before I met you for real. I knew you for years through Clarke’s stories and pictures. I love you. I have a mom, but I have you both too. I want you both. I can still love my mom but have you, can’t I?”

“You’re mom will probably be upset.”

“I know…but if I wasn’t here, I’d be really upset. This is what I want…do you have a mom?”

Clarke moves closer when she hears that. That was something Clarke didn’t know the answer to. Lexa sighs softly and gets up. She sits on the bed and pulls Madi up beside her. Clarke sits on Madi’s other side.

“I did.”

“What happened to her?”

“Nia.” Clarke sucks in a breath at that. “When I was not much older than Aden, Nia took her. I didn’t notice for a while as I was so focused on getting Costia back, and then so broken when I got only her head back.”

“Is she dead?”

“Nia never said. But there’s no reason she wouldn’t have killed her. She’s gone, she’s been gone for years.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you sadder before the execution.”

“It’s alright, Madi.” She strokes the youngster’s head. “Clarke and I were talking and we think maybe you shouldn’t be there.”

“I figured.”

“Did you?”

“I thought Aden and I could keep Anya some company while you two go. She said you have to come get her when it’s time for the queen to die though. But she’ll hang out with us until then. Maybe we can get some stories of you when you were little while we wait.”

“Oh no.”

“You better remember those stories because I’ll want to hear them,” Clarke tells Madi with a smirk and the youngster giggles.

“Clarke!” Lexa looks almost offended. “Remember when Wells offered to share little Clarke stories? I’ll take him up on that offer I swear.”

“You wouldn’t.”

“I would. I’ll ask Abby too. I’m sure she has a lot of stories.”

“Lexa!”

“This is so awesome. I can’t wait to tell Aden what he’s missing!”

“Madi!”

****

“We’re gathered here today to witness the death of two traitors. Nia, former queen of Azgeda, is guilty of plotting against the coalition in time of war, for treason involving having the Commander taken and harming her and threatening three known Natblidas including our Commander. Titus, former Fleimkepa who is stripped of his title, is guilty of treason including taking the Commander to the queen and allowing harm to come to her. Both have been sentenced to death by a thousand cuts.”

The two were tied to trees for everyone to see. Nia looked spiteful and full of hatred while Titus had the decency to looked ashamed. Indra was front and center, reading off their crimes in place of the Commander which everyone understood and respected. Lexa and Clarke were in the front of the crowd. Madi and Aden were safely with Anya and the latter made them swear she’d be gotten so she could watch Nia’s demise.

“Do you have anything to say?” Indra asks Titus coldly.

“I’m sorry, Heda.”

Lexa looks at him and gives the smallest of nods letting him know she heard him but offers no words of forgiveness. As much as she once loved him, she couldn’t offer him forgiveness even as he stared death in the face. Not when Nia’s words threatening Clarke and Madi rung in her head. She couldn’t forgive the fact that if Echo hadn’t stopped Nia, both her love and child could be dead right now along with her.

One by one, members of the clans took turns walking up and cutting the former Fleimkepa. Lexa watched with a face giving no emotion away. The grunts of pain made them flinch here and there. Lexa wished he wouldn’t be so strong. She wished he’d just go. She told herself she wasn’t watching her teacher die. She was watching a traitor. The man who brought Costia up in arguments. Who gave her disapproving looks when she grieved her parents or Costia. Who fought her every step of the way when it came to Clarke. Who tried to kill Clarke and in result shot a bullet through her own abdomen. Who started the ritual as Clarke desperately tried to keep the life inside of her. Who fought her and tried to plant seeds as she left for TonDC after they woke up. Who had Jorum killed and had her knocked unconscious. Who brought her to Nia. Who sat outside the door as Nia tortured her. Who stood there and watched as Nia cut her and threatened her, threatened Madi.

The sad man held on for some reason as they took turns cutting him. Lexa knew it’d be more enthusiastic when it was Nia’s turn. When everyone was done, Lexa knew she’d have to use the sword to end his life. When Gustus approached her with the sword and handed it to her, he uttered the words “ste yuj” like he had the time she had to use the sword on him. Lexa stepped to him, sword in her hand and looks at the bloody man before her who she barely recognized.

“Your fight is over.”

She struck the sword forward and it penetrated his chest. It struck his heart and he exhaled sharply and then he died.

Lexa stayed up front and looked among the crowd with a shuddering breath. “And now, it is time for Nia kom Azgeda, former queen of Azgeda, to die.” The crowd murmured in agreement and those who weren’t already had perked up. Nia’s loyal Azgeda members showed clear contempt on their faces but they all seemed to know better than to say anything for fear of joining their treasonous queen. “Nia has worked against the coalition for too long. She has hurt and killed and tormented for too long. Her reign is over. And so is her life.”

Those in the crowd cheered for their Commander, for the queen's death. The cheer was loud and long. Lexa scanned the crowd and her eyes fell on Clarke who looked neither cheerful or upset—her face stayed composed, her eyes showed her relief. Next she sees Indra who gave her a nod. Roan who, like Clarke, stayed composed. Echo and Ontari had looks of mixed feelings and Echo’s hand was interlocked with Bellamy’s. She saw that Anya had arrived and she looked relieved and mildly happy with Raven by her side to keep the warrior upright as subtly as she could. She was relieved when she didn’t spot Aden or Madi in the crowd.

“What about your treason?” Nia spits at the young Commander.

“I’ve committed no such treason.”

“You hide a Natblida child!”

“We know about the child.” It was the general of Azgeda who speaks much to many of their surprise.

“She told you when? Right before she came to execute me?”

“We knew about Madi before we came back,” the Trikru Ambassador says. “Heda didn’t have to tell us for us to know of Wanheda's child. Of her child now. Madi is protected by the coalition.”

“Has she told you of her plan to turn you all into Natblidas?”

“Yes.” The other ambassadors and generals nod along with him. “We know of their plan to save us.”

“Any other last words?” Lexa asks the fallen monarch.

Nia smashes her lips together when she realizes nothing she could ever say would make them turn on their beloved Commander. Not now when they were so in awe of her overcoming what she did to her. Not when she had Wanheda at her side. Not when the clans were getting along…for now.

Indra hands Lexa the knife and she stares at it contemplatively. Part of her wanted to just end it, to kill Nia so it was done for good. She knew she wouldn’t be faulted for it, not right now. But the other part knew the woman deserved to die from a thousand cuts, deserved to bleed and feel the pain of each mark the knife cut into her. Her forest green eyes meet Nia’s cold blue and she holds her gaze. And then she plunges the knife between her ribs right where Nia had stabbed her. She twists the knife and feels slightly comforted when Nia howls in pain. Lexa needed her to feel the pain. She yanks the knife out and hands it to Indra to pass on as she marches back to Clarke’s side. She has a blank face as she stares at the former queen as each member takes turn cutting, and some taking after the Commander with stabbing.

Lexa can almost feel every slash and stab.

Huts burning as Azgeda waged war on Trikru when she was a mere child.

Unable to fight the tears as her father’s body was burned days later.

Nights of wandering the halls waiting for news of Costia.

The gut wrenching pain as Costia’s head was delivered in a box at the foot of her bed with the single note, “I never hurt a hair on her head,” and the numbness that followed.

Fighting the tears when she learned of her mother’s disappearing and Nia refusing answers.

Love is weakness.

Countless sleeping nights trying to form the coalition despite Nia’s efforts to thwart it.

Assassination attempts she could never truly prove.

Countless ambassadors kicked out of the tower because of their loyalty to their queen.

Clarke’s face covered in black blood and the solo gomplei.

Aden’s head cut off by the child Nia twisted and tormented.

Nia threatening her. Threatening Clarke. Threatening Madi.

The utter betrayal she had a hand in.

The hot burning pain of the knife.

The dizziness and pain and numbness and tiredness that’s followed.

Much like the others before her, the former queen is still somehow alive when the members are finished. Her breathing is shallow and she’s only held up by the binds but she’s alive and Lexa feels an unsettling feeling of rage in her chest. When she takes the sword there’s no hesitation this time. She swings it with all her rage behind it and the sword slices through her neck like butter. Nia’s head falls to the ground and there’s collective murmurs and gasps of shock and surprise. Lexa drops the sword with a clatter and walks away, past Clarke who was saying something but she couldn’t hear through the ringing, past everyone, and into the woods.

Chapter 29: Stories

Clarke trudged into their tent numbly, still processing what had happened. She was as shocked as the others all were when Lexa had suddenly snapped and in a moment of rage beheaded Nia. Then she had walked off into the trees ignoring anything anyone said. Clarke had tried to follow her but Anya had stopped her, telling her the young Commander just needed some time. She told Clarke she should take some time to process herself before she goes to speak with the children. Anya, with Raven’s guidance, went back to her tent where Madi and Aden were waiting promising that Raven would walk them to Clarkes tent to wait for her. So after she took time to process what went down along with waiting for Lexa and still seeing no sign of her, she decided to go see the kids knowing they’d have a ton of questions.

“Clarke!” Madi ran over to her and threw her arms around her waist. Clarke hugs her back and gives Raven a grateful small smile as the brunette slipped out.

“Where’s Heda?” Aden asks, shifting nervously as he stares at the flap behind them.

“Let’s sit, okay?” Clarke asks the children, sinking down on the bed. She pulls Madi up to sit beside her and Aden sits on her other side.

“Where’s Lexa?” Madi repeats Aden’s question.

“Is Titus dead?” Aden asks.

“The queen is dead, right?” voices Madi.

“Hold on,” Clarke gently quiets them. “Titus went first. He got a thousand cuts and in the end Lexa had to use the sword to end him.” Aden closes his eyes and sighs. He was so angry at the man for hurting his Commander but he’s known Titus most of his life and the man taught him and raised him so a part of him ached at the fact he was dead. He ached more for the fact that his Commander had to end his life. “Then Nia tried to turn the crowd against Lexa. Thankfully we told everyone everything beforehand and most of the leaders remembered Madi previously because nobody listened to her. She got the cuts and like Titus, Lexa had to finish her. She was so angry and she didn’t just put the sword through her. She cut off her head.” Aden flinches at that. “I’m sorry.” She puts a hand on the boy’s shoulder, the visual of Ontari holding Aden’s lifeless head still real in his head. 

“Where’s Heda now?” he asks, shaking the memory away.

“I don’t know,” she admits.

“What do you mean?!”

“She walked away after and went into the woods. Anya’s not worried for her safety so I’m not too worried. I am a little worried about what’s going on through her head.”

“Are you going to go look for her?” Madi asks with her little face scrunched up in concern.

“If she’s not back by dark I will.”

****

“You have a lot of people worried about you.”

Lexa swings around defensively. She notes that her guard was way down when she wasn’t able to hear someone approaching her, and a sky person at that. She surveys the boy. She knew he was a good friend of Clarke’s but had spoken to him very little.

“Your Clarke’s friend. Wells?”

“Yeah. Hi.”

“What are you doing here?” her tone is curious and not upset so he sits on the fallen tree, keeping some distance between them.

“I guess with that queen dead and the war won it means it’s time for a celebratory feast so I was out with some others hunting when I saw you. I’m not sure if that’s custom or Indra’s way to distract everyone from the fact you disappeared into the woods.”

“Both.”

“My dad was the Chancellor on the Ark most of my life. He didn’t make the laws but he enforced them. Up there, there was only one punishment no matter how small the crime.”

“Floating.”

“Yeah, that. He floated Clarke’s dad. They knew each other since they were young. Raised their kids together. And he floated him and then locked up Clarke because she knew the secret too. That was mainly Kane though. He’d floated a lot of parents but was never the same after Jake. He had finally ruined his family. My mom was dead, Jake was dead, Abby hated him, Clarke was in solitary and I hated him. What I’m trying to get at is…you didn’t kill anyone who didn’t deserve it. That’s why there’s a celebration. But it’s clearly bothering you. You’re not alone. You have Clarke who’s clearly in love with you, and how many kids? Two now? Don’t shut them out because I can promise you that family is what keeps people together. What makes leaders stay sane from the sentences they must hand out. I watched it destroy my dad, I can’t watch Clarke’s family go up in flames. Not if I can help it.”

“I cut her head off.”

“I saw.”

“Even when I killed her before, I threw a spear into her. I was just so…mad. Before she had gone after me. Killed people I loved. But this time, she got Titus involved and said something to make him betray me. She threatened Clarke. Threatened Madi. I was so…”

“Enraged?”

“Yes. I couldn’t think clearly. I was so angry and on instinct I just swung and took off her head. I lost control in front of all of my people. I lost control in front of Clarke. I showed weakness.”

“Clarke sat for a while waiting for you to return before she went to go see the kids. And as for the celebrating, nobody’s calling you weak. I think they my love you more for what you did.”

“I don’t want them to love me more for that.”

“I know. But they do. You may have been a bit extreme but after all the people she killed and hurt in both lives, I think maybe she deserved what she got.”

“Maybe…when you first came to TonDC you said you had some young Clarke stories.”

“And there’s no Clarke to stop me this time,” he answers with a smile. “Do you want cute or funny?”

“Funny.”

“Okay. Every year on Unity Day the kids on the Ark do a presentation. Being the Chancellor and the Chief Engineer’s kids, we had a big part in the pageant. We really didn’t like the teacher, she would drone on and on and on and I think she kind of hated me especially because of who my dad was. He floated her husband when I was even younger. We were like eight at this point? Well Clarke was so annoyed that she treated me differently. Now one day my dad needed me with him for something, I don’t even remember what it was. But Clarke took the opportunity and she and all the kids saved the most wet parts of their breakfast and lunch that day and some water and mixed it all together.”

“Oh no,” Lexa says, trying to fight a smile.

“They all went to the room for practice early rigged up a bucket over the door with the mixture. Well the teacher went in through the door and this bucket of the most brownish foul smelling goop falls from the bucket that tipped when the door opened and poured all over her. She was soaked head to toe in that monstrosity. She was so angry that she stormed to my dad’s office and started screaming about what his son did without realizing I was in there with him. Clarke and the rest of the kids followed trying their hardest not to laugh and Clarke just looks at her with her hands on her hips with the smuggest smile and says, ‘how could Wells have done it if he’s been with his daddy all day?’ and then she realized I was sitting at the desk with my dad and she got even more mad demanding to know which ‘delinquent’ did it to her and demanded punishment. Clarke being Clarke says loudly in front of my father ‘if we deserve punishment, so do you for how you always treat Wells.’ My dad sent us all out and I don’t know what he said to her but I got a thorough apology and she was never mean to me again. Clarke and the others? They got a very strict talking to about wasting resources and had to clean up all the mess. Totally worth it though.”

By the end of his story he was laughing and was happy to see that the Commander was unable to hold back her laughter anymore.

“I strongly advise you to bring this up to her and see how red her face gets, Commander.”

“Lexa.”

“What?”

“In meetings and around groups of people I’m Heda. But when I’m not…you can call me Lexa.”

“Okay. I got plenty of more stories if you want to hear them, Lexa.”

“I think there’s time for a few more before we must head back. I feel that if I’m still out here by the time the sun sets Clarke will have organized a search party for me.”

“Wouldn’t put it past her.”

****

“Lexa!” Madi sprinted as fast as she could over to the Commander and jumped up into her arms, hugging her tight. Aden followed the younger Natblida and threw his arms around her.

“I’m okay,” Lexa says when she sees Clarke approach her. “Are you okay?”

“I was worried. But I’m okay now.” Aden lets go of Lexa and Clarke wraps an arm around his shoulder. Madi is more than okay to sit on Lexa’s hip and be carried. “Let’s go to our tent for a bit?” The members around them were pretty good about not staring at the exchange no matter how curious but Clarke wanted a moment alone to just breathe before the feast began.

“I’m sorry I worried you.”

“You needed space.”

“You didn’t.”

“I had Madi and Aden. I knew you’d be back.”

“I shouldn’t have done what I did.”

“That ice queen totally deserved it though,” Aden speaks up.

“Aden’s right. It caught us all off guard but she definitely deserved it. I don’t think anyone but the few still loyal to her are upset. There’s a whole feast that is happening because of her dead. How many people did Nia kill and cut their heads off?”

“Too many to count.”

“Exactly.”

“Still was a little…extreme.”

“A little. Wait, I’ve never heard you use that word before.”

“I got it from Wells.”

“Wells?”

“He came across me in the woods. We sat and talked for a while.”

“Oh no.”

“Oh yes.”

“What did he tell you?!”

“What’s happening?” Madi asks.

“Clarke’s best friend told me stories of her when she was little.”

“I wanna hear!” Madi giggles.

“Me, too,” Aden admits cautiously.

“What did he tell you, Lexa?”

“Brown, foul smelling goop.”

“Not that one!”

“He said I needed a laugh.”

“Oh my god.”

“Tell me!” Madi giggles.

Lexa plops Madi down on the bed and sits beside her. Aden climbs on the bed with them and Clarke just shakes her head.

“He told me others, too.”

“Oh my god.”

“I wanna know!” Madi says louder.

“We had this teacher who was really rude to Wells and it made me mad. He was slacking off on school and was doing homework with his dad one day and I kind of arranged a little coup. We all saved parts of our breakfasts and lunches for two days and put it in a pail and soaked it in water and mixed it into a sludge. Mrs. Rourke came in, the pail dumped, and she smelt worse than a latrine.”

Aden and Madi were both laughing at the story.

“She was really mad, I got yelled at and put on clean up duty but Well was never treated differently again.”

“Wells told it better.”

“I’m going to Anya next, I hope you know it.”

“She’s going to tell you about a little girl that always ran away from lessons, climbed trees, through stuff into fires and started mini revolutions. Nothing like little girls who dump stuff on teachers or flood offices or puts chairs upside down.”

“You are very lucky I love you too much to hate you for that.”

“Hm.”

“You’re ridiculous,” Clarke mutters before kissing her.

Chapter 30: One Day

The group was in a full swing meeting discussing moving forward after they spent a few weeks of simmering down after Mount Weather and the executions.

“We know the Nightblood works via bone marrow from Clarke,” Jackson speaks up. “The question is, can those who were given nightblood be donors too? We only have two Nightbloods,” he gestures to Lexa and Ontari, knowing full well that the children weren’t options, “and they only have so much marrow they can safely give.”

“Three if we can somehow convince Luna to again, which won’t be easy.”

“I can talk to her,” Lincoln offers.

“Me, too,” Lexa says. “Luna and I were raised in Polis together. If she hadn’t fled I’d be dead and she’d be in my place right now.”

“I should definitely stay here,” Octavia sighs. “I killed her.”

“In a conclave she voluntarily entered,” Indra reminds her.

“Mother is right,” Gaia gives her a smile. “But if you’d like to stay, I could use help training the Natblidas.”

Octavia smiles softly knowing it was a genuine offer and not just a pity toss. “I’d like that actually.”

“And while you guys do that, Sinclair,  Monty, Jenna and I have an AI to hack and kill so we can use the island,” Raven informs them.

“And drones,” Emori shudders. “Kill the drones too. That was not fun.”

“You’re telling me.”

“So it’s settled,” Lexa says. “Clarke, Lincoln and I will lead a small, peaceful group to Floukru, Raven’s group will work towards defeating ALIE, and Gaia and Octavia will train the Natblidas…while letting them still be kids.”

“Lucy and Zachary were watching as Madi and Lysa were sparring,” Octavia says tentatively.

“If any other children want training I don’t see why they can’t join in as long as those in charge of them agree,” Lexa says.

“Before anyone asks…I guess I can offer some aid in training if more children join,” Anya speaks up.

“Taking it easy while doing so, right?” Raven raises an eyebrow.

“I’ll direct them and help with positions but they can spar with each other.”

“Good.”

“Octavia?” Lexa asks as the meeting adjourns and other start to file out. “Clarke and I will both be going to Floukru. Do you think you could keep an eye on Madi and Aden?”

“Of course. Echo and I do a great job tag teaming kid responsibilities.”

“Oh so I’m now a part of this?” Echo asks with a shine in her eye.

“Yeah, actually,” Octavia smirks at her future sister in law. “Bellamy and you are stuck on babysitting duty with me forever.”

“How am I a part of this?” Bellamy asks but he can't stop the smile from spreading across his facepp.

“You don’t want to help your girlfriend and sister take care of your best friends kids?”

“Not what I said, O,” Bellamy chuckles and tosses a crumpled piece of paper at her head.

Clarke and Lexa left the bickering siblings with chuckles. They knew that the kids would be in good hands.

“Mom!” Madi rums over to them panting with a big smile. “Can we go to the river with Harper and Monty? They want to go fishing!”

“Who is ‘we?’” Clarke asks.

“Me and Aden and Lysa. The others want to stay and play.”

“What did Harper and Monty say to this? Are they aware of you three wanting to go?” Lexa asks this time.

“Yeah! She said to ask you. Lucy and Zach are asking Mister Vincent.”

“Harper and Monty are taking five children to the river?”

“Me and Aden and Lysa are mature children. They’re you’re Natblidas, Mom.”

“Madi.”

“What?”

Lexa just shakes her head with a sigh. It had been an ongoing battle. Clarke had accepted the name “mom" happily but Lexa was still concerned. With being taken to Polis at such a young age and then her own mother disappearing when she was thirteen, Lexa had issues with parental terms. Madi having a mother out there made her more on edge with the term.

“Go on, Mads,” Clarke tells her and the child ran off.

“You know how much she loves you. That’s why she’s so determined to call us her parents. And we introduced her as our child and she’s protected…Lex, do you not want to be a mother?”

“No,” she says incredulously. “I…I never had a mother, not fully. From a very young age I was to follow Anya and train her and I saw my parents for dinner. When I was nine I was sent to Polis and saw my mother so occasionally. Then she was gone. It’s not that I don’t want to be her mother, Clarke. I don’t know how to be one so it’s easier for all of us if you’re who she wants the most.”

“When I met her I was eighteen and had no experience with kids. Like at all. The first kid I interacted with ended up killing my best friend then jumping off a cliff. Then I had very few interactions with Aden. That was it. And I raised Madi all by myself. So trust me, you have more experience and help than I did.”

“Her mother is out there.”

“I know. But regardless of what happens, Madi picked us. Us, Lex. Not just me. Aden though he just wants you.”

“That’s not true! He just doesn’t know what having parents are like and I’m famil…oh.”

“I’m learning to be a warrior and a pretty sad one at that.”

“You’re not. You’re learning and getting better every time. Anya says so.”

“Just like we're learning to be a family. You’re just too stubborn for your own good.”

“And you’re not?”

“Fair. But the point is…I’m learning to fight and lead and be in a family because being a mom and having a family is different. You’re learning to lead through new uncharted territory and how to be happy in a relationship and how to be a parent. Madi is learning how to share because she’s never had to. And she’s a thirteen year old trapped in a five year olds body. And Aden is learning to just be a kid. Somebody’s kid. And how to be a brother. We're learning and we do better.”

“How are you doing so good at this?”

“I’ve already lived through this and that was without you. With you and Madi and Aden? It feels more survivable. And livable. This is completely new to you and everyone’s looking to you for answers.”

“They should look to you.”

“They could. They could take me more seriously if I spoke in meetings. I might not be a Commander but I do hold the former title of Wanheda. You know, I was talking to Indra and she said that if a village chief got bonded their wife or husband became an equal.”

Lexa stopped walking. She stared at Clarke, blinking at her. “Bonded?” It came out as a whisper.

“Um…yeah. Not that we have to. Just being together is the most amazing thing to me,” Clarke says quickly trying to backtrack.

“You don’t want to?”

“Do you want to?”

“Do you?”

“Yeah,” Clarke sighs, shifting. “One day. Or today. Or anytime really. I mean, I’d want to some—”

Lexa cuts her off with a passionate kiss.

“What happened to no public displays of affection?” Clarke whispers.

“I don’t care anymore. Let the world know I love you,” she whispers back before kissing her again. “Maybe we should continue this in our tent.”

“I definitely think we should.”

****

“You better come back to me,” Octavia says softly, face nuzzling into his neck.

“I always will do everything in my power to make it back to you,” he says. It was closest thing he could say without promising. His hand strayed down her bare back, breathing in the earthy smell of her hair.

“I want to go with you, I do. But there’s too many demons even there.”

“Madi needs you here too,” he says. One of his favorite things to see was her interacting with the kids. Sparring with Madi or Aden or even Lysa now. Leading Helios with kids on his back. Showing Lucy how to hold a knife and Zachary how to walk silently. Letting the mountain kids pet Helios in awe.

“She’d have Echo if I left.”

“She wants you both.”

And it was true. Octavia having a strong bond was a little surprising to some. But the former Azgeda spy bonding and spending time with the kids was even more surprising.

“We're family. All of us.”

“Which is why Clarke and Lexa aren’t too worried about leaving Madi behind. They know she’s safe with you. And I’m not too worried because you have family here too. I almost couldn’t believe it at first, but I think Indra would actually sacrifice her life for yours.”

“If both Gaia or I were in danger she definitely would.” She chuckles against his neck. “Somedays she probably thinks that she liked us more when we didn’t get along.”

“Instead of one daughter she’s got two now.”

“Two that rarely listen to her,” she says cheekily.

He laughs at that. “That’s what you get to look forward to.”

There’s a moment of hesitation before she smiles softly. “It could be a boy y'know. Or a girl who's more like you.”

“I think a miniature you would be perfect.”

“You say that now. I bet you'll feel different when that kid is a thirteen year old rebel."

“I won’t take it back.”

“One day you will.”

He grumbles at her. She sits up and chuckles at him. “One day is not today. Today we have nothing else to do.” She climbs onto his lap. “You leave at first light. We should take advantage of the free time we have left.”

He sits up and presses a searing kiss against her lips. They would make good of the time they had left indeed. 

Chapter 31: Ash

“I miss my moms,” Madi says, digging the toe of her boot into the dirt. The group heading to Floukru had left that morning and Madi had been sitting around sullenly since. “I hate it when they both go. Do you miss Lincoln?”

“I do. But I know he’ll be okay. Luna would never put him in danger. And from the stories I’ve heard, she won’t hurt Lexa or Clarke by extension either.”

“I don’t know how I feel about her stories.”

“What stories did you hear?” Octavia asks, curious of what Clarke told her.

“Once upon a time there was a girl who lived by the sea. She had blood that was black so she was sent away to a tower to train to be the Greatest One. There she met a child from the trees that was destined to be the Great One. When the test came, she ran away so the destined one could become great. The Sea Girl disappeared and lived in a castle in the middle of the sea where she took in lost souls tired of war and monsters. After the Great One’s light went out the bravest of them all traveled the world to bring the sea girl the light. But she didn’t want it so she sent them back to the trees. But the unkillable monster came and it poisoned the sea first and killed the fish which poisoned the sea people. The sea girl came begging for help but her people were eaten by the monster. She lived because her black blood was magic blood. They needed her help to give everyone the magic blood because it could save them from the monster. Still she wouldn’t take the light but she had a light of her own. They tested the blood with potions and spells but it wasn’t enough. The spells turned the sea girl’s light to dark and she was angry at the people and wanted the monster to eat them all up. And then the brave girl under the floor—that’s you—saved everyone in the final battle and snuffed out the darkness…but there wasn’t any light left and the sea girl was given back to the sea.”

“The…potions and spells? Did Clarke ever explain that to you?”

“She said they took Luna’s bone marrow and she was mad and became the bad guy.”

“It’s not as simple as that.”

“Just like how Blodreina wasn’t as simple as that?”

“Yeah. I wasn’t there but I got various stories. I guess Luna offered blood and marrow willingly but then someone died in the test. And she didn’t want any more blood on her hands so she said no more. They didn’t give her a choice. So they knocked her out and took her bone marrow. They were going to do it to Emori but Clarke intervened last minute.”

“That’s how she became a Nightblood.”

“Yeah.”

“Then Abby killed the machine, right?”

“That’s right.”

“And Luna was mad that it was all for nothing and they took her bone marrow like they did at mount weather?”

“Exactly.”

“Why did she want everyone to die, though?”

“Grief does a lot to a person, Madi. All her people died, including a little girl she loved. She had nobody left. She believed that maybe the human race didn’t deserve to survive. I don’t know. Sometimes I couldn’t help but agree.”

“But now? Maybe she’ll be good?”

“Maybe. We’ll see.”

“Should we go to training now?”

“Probably. Where’s Aden?”

“He left early to go spar with Lysa and Tomas.”

“Come on then. Let’s go join them.” Octavia got up and held a hand out. Madi took her hand and the pair made their way to where Gia had the other kids. “Octavia.” Madi points to the other two children watching curiously.

“Hey, guys,” Octavia says gently leading Madi over.

“Hi,” comes Lucy’s response. The mountain girl was nervous. Brave as she was in the resistance in the mountain, the outside world scared her.

“Hi,” Zachary echoes.

“Want to come train with us? You don’t have to spar but you can learn! Gaia is a really good teacher. And my brother and my new best friend is there. I’m the youngest but my mom is the Commander so I’m really good.”

“The Commander is a big kid like Maya,” Lucy repeats what she heard back before. “Kids can’t have kids.”

“She’s a grown up. Both my mom’s are. They’re just young grownups. They aren’t my birth parents. They adopted me. They’d have been like…twelve when I was born.”

“Seventeen is still a kid,” Zachary points out.

“Not in our culture,” Octavia says, shifting uncomfortably. The thought of her being a kid made her feel weird. Kids can’t have kids made her feel worse. “Come on, Mads.”

“Wait! I wanna come!” Lucy follows and Zachary follows her.

“If Anya’s not there, we should definitely get her,” Madi says to Octavia who just nods in agreement.

****

“I like watching Gaia teach. She doesn’t just show them how to fight. She teaches them the pillars and how to have obedience. They aren’t little soldiers, they’re children ready for anything. And they need to be. But they need to be kids too.”

Bellamy and Echo were watching the children train with Gaia, Octavia, and Anya. Gaia was talking while Octavia and Anya showed them simple self defense techniques. The two mountain kids were watching nearby at first but then they joined in.

“You could help teach, you know.”

“I couldn’t.”

“You haven’t been yourself since Nia was killed.”

“Just a lot of old stuff got brought up, that’s all.” Her voice is quiet and he looks at her with concern.

“Want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Do you want to go to our tent?” She shrugs and he takes it as good of a yes as he’ll get from her. “Come on.” He takes her hand and he’s relived that she doesn’t pull away. He leads from everyone and to their tent. “Echo?”

“That wasn’t always my name.”

“What?”

“There was an Echo. The real one. She was the closest thing I had to a sister. My village was burned by Azgeda, the queen did take me. But to be a servant girl. I wasn’t supposed to be anything more than that. From a young age, I was to accompany the real Echo, do everything she wanted of me. I learned quickly to mend and fold and fetch from Nia. I still have the scars to show for it. Royals were cruel to their servants, even the children. I was lucky. She was…kind and smart and brave and treated me more like a friend than anything. I grew up with her. Roan was older than us but I accompanied her on many meetings so I knew him well. And Ontari was younger but she followed us. I was goof at fixing things and helping and Ontari’s servant was an older woman who got frustrated at her all the time so I helped her. I taught her to read and helped her organize her belongings and sparred with her when no one was looking. Roan’s servant was an adult too. I think she had a servant the same age as her because she was a child spy and I could accompany her on trips. Nobody would question two lost little girls. One day we were training in the woods. She was being sent on a mission to Sangedakru and she was perfecting her archery. Nia rode up with a Sangedakru spy. Set him free and told her to kill him. She was an archer and a spy in training, not a killer. So she hesitated and she missed. Nia shot him down. She was…angry. So she told her she had one more chance. To kill me. If she didn’t, we’d both me executed. She tried to get me to fight back but I was a servant girl, I wasn’t even a fighter. I had no formal training. It was just instinct I guess when she went in for the kill that I stabbed her first. She was my only friend and she was my first kill. Nia said Sangedakru was expecting a girl named Echo, and that’s who I became.”

“I’m so sorry.” It’s the best he can offer as he wraps his arms around her frame. “What was your name?”

“Ash.”

“Is that what you’d rather be called?” he asks tentatively, still a bit shocked by the whole revelation.

“No. That little girl died that day.” She takes a shuddering breath. “I’m still the same girl you fell in love with.”

“I know. I know,” he hugs her tighter. “You could have told me before.”

“I don’t like thinking about it. First time I remembered it was back in…Sanctum. When they wanted to mind wipe me for Simone. I told my story then because I wanted someone to know my story. But then I was rescued. But I haven’t really thought about it since.”

“Seeing Nia again brought it all back up.”

“It did. It’s a lot to process. A lot to work through.”

“I’m right here.”

“I know. that’s the only reason I’ll be able to work through it at all.”

****

“Are you okay? You don’t look really good,” Madi comments as she walks back to the tent with Aden and Octavia.

“I’m fine, Madi. Just wiped out. There was a lot going on.”

“We barely sparred.”

“I did a lot of barely sparring with a lot of kids. It adds up.”

“You look sick, not tired.”

“Madi, drop it.” Octavia halts mid step and stares at the little girl. The thirteen year old inside of her stared back. “I’m sure Bellamy and Echo would be happy to have her overnight.”

“I don’t want to.”

“If I’m so sick then I shouldn’t be watching you.”

“Not so sick. Just a little.”

“I’m not sick!”

Right on cue as if her body hated her, she couldn’t hold back the sudden queasy feeling. She doesn’t say anything else and trudges forward, willing her stomach to keep it together. They made it to the flap of the tent before she couldn’t hold it back anymore. She doubled over, emptying the contents of her stomach, and coughing as the acid burned her throat.

“I’m getting Indra!”

“Madi, no!” She yells at the child but she’s already disappearing from view. She glances at Aden who’s looking everywhere but at her and she trudges into the tent. She sits on the bed with a heavy sigh, resigning herself to her fate. “Fuck, she’s going to kill me.”

Chapter 32: Love and Faith

Notes:

They're not super long, but three chapters in three days?
I'm sort of on a roll. Although the last five or so chapters have had the lowest amount of comments in the entire story so I'm wondering if it's just not as enjoyable as it was before?

Also Clexa fans and those waiting for Luna, the next chapter will be 100% our group at Floukru!

“I should go stay with the other Natblidas,” Aden says, eyes on the floor.

“If you want,” Octavia tells him. She’s waiting for Madi to burst through the tent with Indra in tow. God knows what Madi had told her. “Can you wait? It’s dark out now. Someone should walk Madi to Echo’s tent and you to the Natblidas.”

“I can go on my own. I can even walk Madi. I’m twelve.”

“I’d rather a grown up walk you.”

“Well…Indra won’t be able to. Unless she brings someone…Lexa let me go off my own. And let me bring Madi. Echo’s tent isn’t far. And there’s so many guards near the Natblida’s that I’ll be safe.”

“Okay,” she relents, too tired to argue.

Aden sighs and sits on the bed beside her. “You said you’re not sick. Was that just for Madi?”

“No. I’m really not sick. My stomach felt a bit off but I’m not sick. But I do feel a little weird. But I’m okay. I’m not going anywhere.”

He smiles at that with some relief. “Good. I’m tired of people leaving. My parents handed me off to Polis when I was a baby, did you know that? Most people were happy and proud to have a Natblida but my parents? I don’t know if it hurt too much or they were mad but I was just a few months old when I was dumped there. Lexa wasn’t even Heda yet when I was dumped. I would have been taken as the new group after her conclave when I was older. I should have grown up in Trikru and been a second maybe even to Anya and sent to Polis when I was a bit older. Lexa became Heda when she was eleven, and she had been there a couple years by then. I was there my whole life. I didn’t have parents. Just…Lexa and Titus. And now Titus is gone and I’m not mad. He hurt Lexa. But she and Clarke have left again. I just hate people leaving.”

“You’re stuck with me, kid.”

“Okay,” he meets her gaze finally with a cautious smile.

The flap swung open and Madi raced into the tent panting. Octavia groaned when Indra followed her in, looking worried. She wondered exactly what Madi had told her. Aden sees th discomfort and gets up. “Come on, Madi. I’m bringing you to Echo.”

“But—no!”

“I told you not to go get anyone!” Octavia switches to English with annoyance.

“Octavia!” Indra’s tone had a warning to it. Octavia’s eyes flit to Madi and she sees genuine tears filling the little girl’s eyes. She sighs, realizing the child had been actually scared. Herself nearly collapsing and puking her guts up probably made Madi think she might actually be deathly ill with everything the kid had been through in her life, prior and current.

“I’m sorry, Madi. I do need you to go, though. Not because of you doing anything. I just…have to have a grown up talk with Indra, and it’s something even thirteen year old you would have been sent away for also.”

“So you are really sick?”

“No. I’m not. Go with Aden. And don’t worry Echo or my brother, please? Just tell them I had to have a meeting with Indra, do not mention ‘sick’ or anything like that. Okay?”

“Okay.” Madi takes Aden’s hand reluctantly and follows him out of the tent.

“What did she tell you?” Octavia asks once the children are gone.

“You got sick from barely sparring and looked like you were dying. Pale, sweaty. Said you collapsed and were throwing up. You scared her pretty good.” Indra reaches out and brushes her fingers against her cheek. “You don’t look that well.”

“I’m not sick,” she says in exasperation though it comes out as more of a whine. She feels a frustrated tear roll down her cheek and she swipes it away quickly. “I’m fine.”

“You might not be sick but you’re not fine. Gaia said you were fine sparring with the kids. Said you worked hard but didn’t seem ill. So I believe you aren’t sick. Are you hurt then? Did you take a hard hit somewhere?”

“No.”

“Did you eat something you shouldn’t have?”

“I’m not five.”

“Did you eat anything?”

“Um…I took a break and ate some fruit.”

“Sparring all day and you only ate some fruit? No wonder you got sick. You know better than to spar for hours in the sun on an empty stomach!”

“I wanted to eat but the smell of the meat made me feel so sick.”

“The smell?”

“Um…”

“Octavia.” Her tone and look told her that she knew.

“I didn’t try to! Didn’t not try to. It just…happened. We wanted to at some point. After Praimfaya. Not before! And I don’t—he’s so happy Indra and I can’t say how absolutely terrified I am and I couldn’t tell anyone because—because I don’t want anyone to hate me or be disappointed in me and of course you’d be disappointed because I’m a little disappointed. I’m not disappointed at the situation, I’m disappointed at myself for being…me. It’s normal here for people to have kids young but I, I’m not even seventeen yet. Emotionally I’m older but I mean that barely counts because of Blodreina and all of that stuff and I can’t even—I’m such an idiot. We’re what, nine, ten months from Praimfaya? How do we even—”

“Breathe.” Physical touch was rare for Indra but it always went out the window when it came to the sky girl she had taken under her wing. And this was no exception. She sits beside the girl and wraps her arms around her and lets her cry into her shoulder. “I’m talking to you. I want your input. Not what you think anyone else wants. What you want.”

“O-okay.”

“Do you want to do this?”

“I’m scared.”

“Most are, even those who deliberately have children. That wasn’t the question.”

“I want a family with him. More than anything. He’s my whole world.”

“Let’s break this all down then because you’re doing yourself no good with all this worry. First, how long have you been hiding this?”

“A couple weeks.”

“Before or after mount weather?”

“After.” She shudders, thinking about how close she was to dying and now knowing that it wasn’t just herself she almost got killed.

“Have you seen a doctor?”

“Shayla.” She mentions one of Trikru’s healers. When Lincoln had mentioned it to Nyko he had sent them Shayla’s way. If someone was hurt, Nyko was the best. If someone was with child, it was Shayla’s territory.

“What about Abby? Surely Skaikru’s more advanced at this especially with mount weather’s tech now.”

“No. Abby will not know and will not come anywhere near me!”

“Octavia.”

“No! I don’t want Abby or Kane anywhere near me or my child. They still think of me as a devil, I would not trust them with my child’s life. If I need more than Shayla can offer, there’s Maria.”

“The Mountain Men doctor.”

“Better than Abby.”

Indra sighs but it’s better than a straight up refusal. “You need to eat. You need to find something more than fruit that won’t make you ill. You aren’t just feeding yourself. You’re growing another person inside of you. So you will eat.” Octavia nods with a sigh. “I’m serious. Don’t think I didn’t notice that you barely eat. You haven’t touched any meat since we left the bunker and that was long before you were with child. but you need to work on that, if not for you then for your child.”

“Okay. I…I’ll try.”

“That’s all I can ask of you. Also no long days sparring in the heat, even if it’s just with children. You can do light careful sparring with people who know to be careful, you can teach and direct from a distance to real spars. But you will be taking things carefully. Madi needs to know so she doesn’t run right into you anymore. You brother needs to know. Others you’re around often should know. You can hide it now but eventually you won’t.”

“Bellamy will be mad.”

“How can you be so sure?”

She shrugs. “He’s my big brother. It’s his job to be protective and a little mad, even though he likes Lincoln.”

“Then let him be a little mad. You just said it comes from wanting to protect you.”

“Are you a little mad?”

“A little frustrated. But it’s not my place to be anything but. Doesn’t make me love you less.”

Octavia looks down, last time she uttered those words flashing through her mind. “Love no one and no one can hurt you.” “I love you. Does that make me weak?” “I would never say that to you, Seda.”

“Octavia.”

She looks back to Indra and takes a steadying breath. “And Praimfaya?”

“We do better this time. We’re already working on the nightblood solution. We have a team working to keep the building from collapsing on the bunker. Mount Weather and Shallow Valley are being prepared with supplies as well. We have teams looking for any other bunkers to avoid the death wave. The Second Dawn bunker is already mostly ready.”

“I won’t be in there.”

“Octavia!”

“I won’t. I can’t. I’ll go to Mount Weather before I go back there.”

“I guess I should get used to the idea of the mountain.”

“Indra.”

“I’m going where you’re going and others probably will too. Your brother, Echo.”

“Lexa and Clarke would be in the second dawn one with Madi.”

“Probably.”

“Maybe I need to get used to facing my demons.”

“That’s entirely up to you.”

She rests her head on Indra’s shoulder. “Do you think Lincoln’s okay?”

“I’m sure they’re all okay.”

“They should be there by morning if they traveled without a lot of breaks.”

“They’ll be okay, Octavia. Have some faith.”

“I try,” she mumbles softly. “I try.”

Chapter 33: Her Conclave

Polis, ten years ago

“Aleo, wait up!” Luna shouted, running after her brother. Her brother, two years older than her, raced ahead while she dragged Lexa, two years younger than her, with her.

“You catch up!” the twelve year old shouted back to the two girls.

“She’s got little legs!” Luna yells and the oldest slows with a groan.

Despite being siblings, the two Floukru Natblidas couldn’t be an different. Aleo sought out trouble while Luna would de-escalate everything she could. He fought with aggressive, she fought smart. He was loud and sometimes rude, she thought carefully before every word. He liked sneaking out, and well…she did too. She just hadn’t expected Lexa to follow this time. She wasn’t surprised though. Although Lexa was one of the younger ones in their group, she showed much promise. Almost as much promise as Luna did. So Titus kept a sharp eye on her, too. Luna knew though that despite Luna holding the best odds to win should Heda die anytime soon that Lexa was his favorite.

Lexa was everybody’s favorite.

She was an adorable little thing. Small but quick and stronger than she looked. She was smart, so incredibly smart. She was well beyond her years. She knew that Anya, who she never met but heard in a million stories from Lexa, had trained her well. Lexa excelled at every weapon she picked up but she liked swordsmanship best. She was solemn, but when she smiled she lit up the room. Luna liked to make her smile. She had big, innocent eyes. Eyes as green as the forest and long brown curls she kept braided back all fancy. Luna sometimes thought she’d make a great Commander one day. But then she remembers that she and her brother would need to die for that and she shoves the thought away. She prays that when the time of the conclave comes, that someone else kills Lexa first because she didn’t know if she could.

“We’re going to be in trouble,” Lexa tells them with a too serious face for a little eight year old girl.

“Lighten up, Lex. Titus might be mad but you won’t ever be punished.”

“What does that mean?”

“He has favorites.”

“No.”

“Yes,” he rolls his eyes.

“Aleo. She’s eight.”

“So? Phylo is eight too and he knows differences.”

“Phylo is a troublemaker. Of course he’s treated differently.”

“Am I a troublemaker then?” Aleo challenges.

“Do you hurt other Natblidas?”

“No…”

“Then you’re different. What are we doing anyways?”

“I was going to go to the market to get some good food. I didn’t know you two would be tagging along. I guess it works out though. I was gonna use the last of the coins father sent me but if you go in there looking all cute maybe we can get something for free. We know how these people feel about Natblidas. We could be their future Heda. And nobody can ever say no to you anyways. So…go be cute.”

Lexa shrugs and leads the way. They got looks here and there as people recognized them. Sometimes they got looks of pity, especially Aleo and Luna. They were brother and sister and only one would live. Sometimes Lexa got looks of pity, this tiny little whisp of a girl who’d have to face off with others. Luna at ten didn’t have too much height on Lexa but twelve year old Aleo was tall for his age. Luna knew deep down that if the conclave happened today, even Lexa could take him and it hurt to think that.

“Hi, Mari!” Lexa put on her best smile as the three approached.

“Hello, Lexa, Luna, Aleo,” the baker smiled at the two girls. All three of the children were frequent visitors.

“Could we have some sweet bread?” Lexa asks with eyes as wide as saucers and the baker smiles at them and nods.

“Here you go, child.” She gave each child a wrapped up piece of the dessert.

“Thank you!” they all beamed at her.

“Now hurry back before Titus realizes you’re all gone,” she winks at them.

“Come on,” Luna grabbed Lexa’s hand with her free hand and the three made their way back to the tower, munching on their treats. “Sun is setting.”

“We’re in trouble if Titus catches up,” Aleo agrees. “But they can’t really do anything to hurt us. We’re sacred kids.”

“Yes they can,” Lexa frowns at him, dumbfounded. “They do so hurt us!”

“What the hell are you talking about?” Aleo gives her a look like she’s an idiot.

“Nothing,” the youngest of them pouts, taking a bite of her bread. “I don’t wanna get in trouble. I don’t wanna be hurt.”

“Nobody is going to hurt us, stupid. Titus will lecture us good and be disappointed but that’s it. And totally worth it for a treat.”

“Ignore him. He thinks he’s smarter and better because he’s older,” Luna whispers and the little one grins.

The three run for the lift once they’re in the tower. They climb into the ladder behind it and the three climb their way all the way up, rung by rung. It feels like they were climbing for ages by the time they arrive at their level.

“What do we have here?” one of the guards ask when they spot the children closing the door.

“Went for a walk?” Luna says nervously. Aleo just crosses his arms. Lexa on the other hand hides behind Luna, peeking anxiously around her.

“Dieran, do not scare my Natblidas. I will see to it that they learn,” Titus’ voice booms as her walked down the hall looking very unhappy. The young guard nodded his head and stepped away and the three children followed their Flamekeeper nervously.

“Remember: the sweets were worth it,” Aleo whispers and the girls giggle, stopping when they received Titus’ disappointing look.

****

Rod to Floukru, present day

“We should arrive at the beach at first light,” Lincoln tells the group. They were taking a short break, mainly for the horses. He knew the path to Floukru pretty well by now.

“I miss Madi and Aden,” Clarke says, sitting down on a fallen tree while her horse drank from the creek.

“I do, too,” Lexa tells her s she sits down beside her. “But they’ll be okay. We left them in good hands. Octavia, Echo, and Bellamy are more than capable. And Indra is there, too.”

“Why did Indra stay? That’s unlike her.”

“Lincoln said she needed to stay just in case. In case of what, I have no idea but I won’t argue that.”

Clarke is quick to change the subject, the thought of anything happening to their children too much. “When is the last time you saw Luna?”

“Day of my conclave.”

“How old were you?”

“Eleven.”

“How old was she?”

“Thirteen. When did you last see her?”

“Day of her conclave right before Praimfaya.”

Lincoln moved over to them. “What was she like before she decided humanity wasn’t worth saving?”

“She kept a lot to herself,” Clarke starts. “We um, went to Floukru to try to convince her to take the Flame.” Her hand seeks out Lexa’s holding her hand tight to remind herself that she was here and alive. “ALIE was coming and the flame was the only way to win. Only ALIE 2.0 could stop ALIE. She didn’t want it, said she never did. ALIE followed us there and her lover was killed. We were sent back home with no Commander. Next time I saw her was after ALIE was defeated. The radiation affected the fish in the sea and all of Floukru was ill. They all died, even Adria, who was like a daughter to her. That’s when we realized Nightblood was the key. She went to Becca’s island with my mom, Jackson, Miller, Raven, Murphy, and Emori. I’m not sure what went on at the island other than that she and Raven became good friends and she helped Raven with her demons and seizures. I joined them with Roan later. When I joined, Emori lied about someone so we would test it on him over anyone else. It failed and she didn’t want to test again. she didn’t want her bone marrow to be used on someone else who could be killed by the radiation. We um…took her choice away just like they did at Mount Weather. Took her marrow and were going to use it on Emori but I couldn’t let them. so I injected myself and my mom panicked and destroyed the machine so it was never tested.”

“You did what you thought you had to do,” Lexa tells her softly.

“Don’t do that,” Clarke says, heavy with emotions.

“Do what?”

“Talk to me like that. Like every time someone does something horrible as long as it’s for their people it absolves them of all guilt. That’s not how that works, Lexa. Bad things are still bad no matter what. Doing it for someone doesn’t make it right. Some people feel guilt.”

“I’m sorry.” When Clarke doesn’t meet her gaze she sighs and gets up. “I’m going to go check on the others.”

“Wait, Lexa. Don’t go, please.” But she was already walking away. “Great.”

“She’s just giving you some space. Which you seem to need,” Lincoln tells her.

“Don’t go.”

“I’ll stay until she returns.”

“Thank you,” she sighs. “I know she’s trying to help. I wish I saw the world the way she does. She was murdered and still didn’t want to see the worst in the man who killed her. She gave Nia chance after chance. She tries so hard for everyone. I just…I wanted Titus and Nia to die painfully before they hurt her this time. I’ve tried to be the good guy, to see the best in people, but I can’t. Not when I’ve had all these losses and seen so much pain. I just…if I’m not watching out for us, who will?”

“I think she’s capable of deciding who’s good and who’s bad. Titus was a personal issue. I’ve known Lexa a long time. She’s always struggled with feelings and things being personal. She did everything for her people and nothing for herself. So when she says she did things for her people, she means it with her whole heart. This is new to her, being in love and having a child. She’s learning as much as you are. And I can guarantee she’s not upset at you, she just thinks it’s easier to give you space than it is to talk. But I think the two of you need to talk before we get to Luna.”

She nods in agreeance. “Do you think Luna will help?”

“If she’s anything like the Luna I knew then yes, I think she will. But she will likely need convincing.”

“That’s what you and Lexa are here for.”

“We knew her at different times. The Luna Heda knew, the Luna I knew and the Luna you knew are very different people.”

“Maybe bringing three people she knew at three different times could be exactly what she needs.”

“Hopefully it’s enough.”

****

Polis, eight years ago

 “Luna. Luna!”

Luna rolled over and groaned into her pillow, unhappy about the ten year old shaking her awake. “Go. Away.”

“Luna!”

Luna sat up in bed with an annoyed huff. “Lexa, it’s late. We’re supposed to be asleep. What are you doing in my room?”

“I can’t sleep.”

“Well I can.”

“Can I sleep in your bed. Please?”

“You know that’s not allowed.”

“Please?”

That’s when Luna noticed the tear marks on the younger girl’s face and heard her voice breaking. “What happened?” She scoots over and lets her climb onto her bed. Just this once, she tells herself. She reaches out and grabs her arm to help her climb up.

“Ow!”

“Are you hurt?”

“No,” the younger girl says quietly. “I just can’t sleep.”

“If Titus finds you in here…”

“I’m not afraid of Titus. Titus yells but he’s nice. He doesn’t hurt anyone. Maybe feelings but that’s all.”

“Who hurts people then?” Luna asks, laying back down. This wasn’t the first time the younger girl had climbed into her bed in the middle of the night with injuries she wouldn’t show or explain. Luna was wondering if the bold little girl was picking fights and came to her when she lost. She wouldn’t be surprised—Phyllo often sported bruises, too, and he was known to be a troublemaker. “Phyllo?”

“Sometimes he does.”

“You should stop getting into fights.”

“I’m not!”

“Sh!”

“I’m not. Not all the time. I’m not a troublemaker.”

“Well, you’re something.”

“Can we talk about something else?”

“Like what?”

“Like how Heda is really ill.”

“He is not!”

“He is. I heard them talking. Titus and Dieran were talking. They think the conclave will be soon.”

“What else did you hear?”

“Titus wants to focus on my training. Dieran said he shouldn’t bother cause you’ll be the next Commander.”

“Lexa. Are you sure you heard right?”

“I’ve been watching Heda. He’s paler and seems sicker. He’s dying and he doesn’t have much time left. Can you promise me something?”

“What?”

“If we’re paired, can you make it quick? I don’t like being hurt.”

“That’s…inevitable. We need to fight until…”

“I won’t fight, not if you promise you’ll make it quick.”

“Don’t talk like that. You’d make a better Commander. You’ve memorized and lived by all of the pillars already.”

“I don’t want to hurt anybody.”

“Promise me that whoever you’re paired with you’ll fight? You’ll win?”

“Only if you promise you’ll make it quick if we’re paired. I can’t beat you, I know that. I know I can hold my own against the others but not you. So promise.”

Luna swallows hard before whispering, “I promise.”

****

Floukru checkpoint, present day

“I’m sorry,” Clarke says as the others started working on the signal fire. Lincoln was instructing the group.

“No, you have no reason to apologize Clarke. I’m sorry. you’re right. Just because we do things for our people doesn’t mean that it’s good. Like abandoning you at Mount Weather.” Clarke looks at her. “I did it and saved all of my people, but I betrayed you and it is one of my deepest regrets.”

“I have a lot of regrets, too.” Clarke shoves her hand sin her pockets, looking down. Luna, stealing the bunker, almost shooting Bellamy (and then later actually shooting Bellamy) were all some of her deepest ones. She wasn’t sure how she’d face Luna after what she’d done.

“You feel guilty about Luna.”

“I tried to make her take the flame against her will the first time. I left that out of the story.”

“And you hate that because ALIE took free will and you almost did the same.”

Clarke pulled her hand free from her coat and wrapped it around Lexa wanting her close. Lexa could tell that Clarke needed to be the one held so she turned and wrapped her arms around her, holding her close. She rested her head against her shoulder, face hiding in the crook of her neck. “Exactly.”

“I have plenty of Luna regrets too.”

“From when you were kids?”

“I asked her to make it quick.”

“You—what?”

“I knew I couldn’t beat her. I was ten, a few weeks from turning eleven. Heda was gravely ill. I told Luna I wouldn’t fight her as long as she killed me quickly.”

“Lexa!” Clarke lifts her head an looks at her in horror.

“Next thing I knew she was gone. She fled and I won. Titus wanted to send guards after her but I wouldn’t let him. She had just killed Aleo and ran to spare me. she was broken, too. So in a way, I took her choice from her too. I made her think that fighting guaranteed my death. I’ve had to live with that my whole life. I’m thinking Lincoln may be the only person she’ll be happy to see.”

“Unless Lincoln has a story to share too,” Clarke says, trying to smile. It doesn’t quite meet her eyes.

“Luna forgave you, right? She came to you later?”

“She asked me not to turn her away like she had to us. I don’t know if she forgave me exactly, but she trusted me enough to help. But there was nothing we could do. We tried though. We tried to make it right.”

“You did everything you could.”

“I did.”

“Maybe she won’t be upset to see you, then.”

“How do you know she won’t be happy to see you? Maybe you weren’t the reason that she even fled. It was just a part of a bigger story?”

“Because unlike you, neither of us ever reached out to each other again.”

“She couldn’t go to Polis and you couldn’t just up and leave to some secret place.”

“I up and left to TonDC the second we woke up.”

“That’s different…I think. Wait who’s running Polis?”

“The Ambassadors.”

“The ones who staged a coup against you?”

“Clarke!”

“Sorry,” she chuckles. “Are they expecting you back at any time?”

“No. They know we have to go to the island. Clarke? Will it hurt?”

“The bone marrow?” Lexa nods. “You’ll be asleep for the actual procedure. You’ll be a shot, just a needle prick. When you wake up, it’ll hurt a bit. Stiff, sore.”

“How does it happen? The procedure?”

“You don’t need to—”

“I do.”

“Um…my mom will be doing it. So, um…she’ll have to cut the skin at your hip. Right here,” her hand presses against Lexa’s hip, “and she’ll um, drill a hole into the bone.” She doesn’t miss the wince. “Then she takes the marrow out. Cleans the area, puts in some stitches. It’ll hurt fr a while because there’ll be a hole in your bone. Not a big one though. and stitches sometimes pull and it gets itchy sometimes too. You’ll be okay.”

“You’ll be there the whole time?”

“Yeah. I will.”

“Okay.”

“They’re coming!” Lincoln calls and the two women join them. The Floukru warriors emerge from the sea. There’s some recognition when they see Lincoln and some freeze as Lexa approaches.

“I am Heda Lexa kom Trikru, and we seek safe passage to speak with Luna kom Floukru.”

They don’t deny their Commander though a few look like they want to. Here was the mighty Commander, at their hidden meeting ground signaling a fire, wanting to go to their secret, sacred home to speak with their leader. One of the men hold out vials Clarke knows all too well.

“Thank you,” Lexa says warmly and the cold guard thaws a little.

Lincoln drinks first, after he’s already sitting. Clarke sits, pulling Lexa with her. The two share one last look before downing the vial. Soon the world faded to black.

****

Polis, eight years ago

The horn sounded throughout the land, telling everyone that their Commander was dead. They gathered in the chambers and wished the spirit of the Commander to find favor over them. “May the spirit of the Commander choose me.”

Most of the children knew they wouldn’t survive. They all knew Luna was likely to kill them all.

Luna was in the back. She had done her own war paint and was now helping Lexa do hers. She had turned eleven just the day before and this was not how Luna wanted to celebrate it. She wasn’t mentally ready to kill seven other children, one being her own brother and another being a child she thought of like a little sister. She loved them.

“Remember your promise?” Lexa asks and Luna’s hand stilled.

“Lexa.”

“You promised. I need you to keep it.”

“Keep what?” Aleo asks, coming over. He had be fighting back tears all day. He knew him and his sister would not both make it out alive and he knew that if only one could live, it would be his little sister. He would make sure of it.

“She promised she’d make it quick.”

“If we’re paired she isn’t going to fight,” Luna manages to say as she blinks back tears.

“Luna…I won’t fight either. I won’t hurt you.”

“Aleo, no!”

“You need to make it, Luna. This is your time.”

“I wouldn’t make a good Commander. I don’t want it. You do, you both do.”

“I can’t beat you, and I don’t want to,” Lexa says, looking down.

“And I won’t kill my sister.”

The three of them looked at each other, knowing this was their last moment together. Years they spent in the tower, for years Luna chased after her brother and Lexa chased after her. They weren’t so little anymore. Eleven, thirteen, fifteen.

“Natblidas!” Titus stepped into the room. “It is time. Remember, you are all worthy of your blood.”

Lexa takes Luna’s hand and the three walk out of the room. Lexa looks back, saying a silent farewell.

They would go a pair at a time. whoever won would be paired with the next and they’d keep going until only one remained. Luna thought it was ridiculous. Whoever won the first round, in order to survive and be Commander, would then have to kill six more children.

The fates were cruel that day.

Luna and Aleo were drawn first.

Lexa had hugged Luna tight and she was quick to throw her arms around Aleo’s waist. As much as he teased her, he was family. And one of them was about to die.

Aleo didn’t just kneel down and accept his fate. Swords clashed, he put on a show. He didn’t play along for long. He didn’t want to tire her out. He got in the way of her sword instead of dodging and the sword went right through his abdomen. Luna withdrew hew sword in shock and watched as he lay on her floor, choking in his own blood. She ends it quickly with a sob. They praise her like she’s a victor but she feels anything but when her brother was laying in a puddle of blood at her feet.

Fate was crueler.

It was crueler when before she could process that Aleo was dead that she was paired with Lexa. Lexa who made her promise. Lexa who wouldn’t fight. The feeling of her sword embedding itself into Aleo was too much and she couldn’t do it to that little girl. So she slipped out in the chaos and disappeared leaving Lexa to hold her own against everyone else.

She had wanted to say goodbye, but she couldn’t.

She had disappeared to the sea and beyond. She remembered hearing the trumpet as the conclave was won. And she remembered the relief when she heard that Lexa kom Trikru was the new Commander. She did her part for her soul and left Lexa to deal with the rest. She could do it. Aleo had told her that she was born for it but she knew that she wasn’t. Lexa was born to be the Commander and now her reign had begun.

****

Floukru, present day

The group were beginning to come to. Clarke immediately recognized the storage unit they had been in before.

“Lexa,” she whispers, reaching out. She felt Lexa’s fingers and squeezed her hand.

“Clarke.” Her name came out groggily.

“You’re up. Good,” Lincoln says and Clarke sit sup, wincing at her sore muscles.

“How long have you been up?”

“Not long. A few minutes at most.”

Clarke nods and tugs Lexa’s arm, encouraging her to get up with her.

Noise approaches the storage unit and they wait expectantly. It opens and the man who handed out the vials steps in. Luna steps in behind him. She smiles when she sees Lincoln, remembering the pain she felt when she learnt of his death. “Lincoln.” She spies Clarke and knows it’s not a social visit. Then she sees the woman beside Clarke.

“Hello, Lexa.”

Chapter 34: A Better Place

Notes:

Hey everyone.
I'm sorry that this chapter took so long to produce and that it's not a great chapter.
I've had so much go wrong in my life and it started going downhill over 6 months ago. Recently I had to rehome almost all of my animals, leave my house, I'm back home but may have to leave again when they start repairs. Almost had to sell my horses because of how much work I missed due to not being home. So my mental health has been...bad. And I had absolute no motivation to do anything let alone write. I'm back, hopefully more regularly again.

“You’re here about my Nightblood.” It was the first thing Luna said after the group settled. She was in a room with her guards and with Clarke, Lexa, and Lincoln.

“Yes,” Clarke answered first without hesitation.

“Are you here to ask me, or to order me to?”

“Ask,” Lexa answers this time, voice soft. “You can say no and we’ll leave. Abby and Raven could go to space, they probably still will. But we know now that the bone marrow does work.”

“Do you?” Luna questions with a scowl. “The machine got destroyed. I bled for nothing.”

“You bled to save a little girl’s life,” Clarke responds. “Octavia won the conclave and united the clans. One hundred people per clan lived in the bunker. Raven, Bellamy, Echo, Murphy, Emori, Monty, and Harper went back to the Ark. I didn’t make it to either one. I thought I was giving up my life so they could make it to the Ark but the Nightblood worked. I was alone for a while. Then I met Madi. She was a six year old Natblida that was hidden from the Flamekeeper’s scouts. We saved each other. We lived together for six years before others came. Now, you can help save everyone. Lexa and I are here instead of being with Madi, who’s back to being a little girl, because we need your help. Lexa can only give so much marrow to get us started and we won’t touch the children.”

“The children?”

“My Natblidas. Titus…he’s dead. They’re at TonDC right now being watched by Indra and Gaia.”

“What did he do this time?”

“Took me and brought me to Nia.” Luna sucked in a breath at that. “She’s dead too, now.”

“It’s more than just a bunker now to avoid the wave itself,” Lincoln speaks up. “We’re allied with the Mountain Men. Working on seeing if there’s any viable bunkers elsewhere. But that’s two large bunkers and a valley to avoid the death wave. Both bunkers can only sustain so many people long term but with the Nightblood solution, it could fit a lot more for a short time. I was told the radiation hit Floukru first.”

“It affected the fish. Killed everyone but me.”

“Move Floukru before the point it happened. With Titus gone, you’re free to return, Luna.”

“And Adria can have friends there,” Clarke says and Luna’s face softens at the child’s name. “Aden’s about her age. And there’s other kids too. Kids from the clans and the mountain.”

“I’ll need to speak to the others. And think about this. I will not jump in blindly. You are welcome to stay a few days as we decide. For real, this time.”

“Thank you.”

“Ryn will show you to your quarters,” Luna says to the two women. “Lexa, I’d like to talk later if that’s alright?” The young Commander nods before she and Clarke followed Ryn. “Lincoln, perhaps we should speak.”

“Of course.” He sat back down beside her.

“So. Your lover really reunited the clans like you always dreamed of?”

He nods with a smile. “She did. I knew it was possible. To be united as one. Lexa had the right idea about the coalition. I thought it could go further than just being allied. I was right. There was more to them than just warriors. There were peacemakers, understanding each other, having faith. They might not be Wonkru right now but it’s inside them all. Everyone is capable of it.”

“I’d love to see it. I’d love to see old traditions die and others start anew.”

“Lexa’s in the works of outlawing the conclave, or at least the way it happens.”

“I’d love to see that. I wished we had someone like that when we were kids.”

“So your brother could still be alive.”

“Yes. I lost Aleo, Lexa and myself that day.”

“I’m sorry.”

“I gained you, though. You helped me find myself again.” She squeezed his arm. “I owe you my life. Though your lover killed me so I guess in a sense I did give you my life.” She sighs when she realizes how not funny it was.

“War turns people into people they aren’t.”

“War turns people into monsters,” she corrects.

“You weren’t a monster.”

“I was close enough at that point. I could go ahead and blame Skaikru but I am my own person responsible for my own action. But enough about the past. You’re glowing, you have been this whole time. Tell me why.”

“You need to keep this to yourself.”

“Of course,” she says, confused.

“Octavia will want to tell Clarke herself.” Luna’s eyes widen as it sinks in. “It’s still pretty early, but I’m going to be a father.”

Luna hugs him suddenly like the girl sh once was, smiling big. “You always wanted a family. I’m so happy for you.”

“We were hiding it. I wanted to tell everyone but Octavia was scared.”

“Scared of being judged with it being so close to Praimfaya?”

“Exactly.”

“Well screw them all. Some happiness has gotta come from all of this.”

“I might be the happiest I’ve ever been.”

“I guess I should start talking to the others so that you can get back to your love as soon as possible. Will you be bonded before the babe comes? Or wait until after?”

“I would be bonded to her tomorrow if I could. You should come with us and see her. Tell her how happy you are that there’s a babe coming. It’d go a long way to making her feel…okay.”

“I will. As soon as I can.”

“And I could use a sparring partner now that mine is down for the next eight months.”

“I bet she could still kick your ass.”

“Oh I know she could. She’s a little terror. Wait until you meet Heda and Clarke’s kid. She’s a little force of nature. She was Heda after Lexa died.”

“From Heda to Heda’s child.”

“Was Clarke’s kid before she was Heda is what I’ve been told. I guess Clarke didn’t want her to be Heda. Said they all die. Plenty of them young.”

“I think our Heda before Lexa was one of the longest living ones. Very few lived to see forty years. Lexa was too young when she was killed.”

“She became Heda too young too. Madi was the same age when she became Heda so I was told.”

“I’m glad she’s trying to change it. Let the children be children.”

“Agreed. If Nightblood works, all the children in our future will be Natblidas. My child will be. Only because of injections. But now that I’m going to be a father, the thought of being a parent and having my child taken to be Heda or killed makes me sick.”

“Most are proud that they had a Natblida child. I could never. Not after seeing it firsthand. Madi is lucky she has parents who’ll do their damdest to change the world for her. Lexa and I know more than anyone how the burden of winning the conclave weighs. I didn’t win. But I took my brother’s life and felt the fear when I was pared with Lexa. Saw the fear on her face. The pain on Aleo’s. I will never forget any of that.”

“I remember how broken you were when I found you in the woods that day. That will always stay with me, too.”

“We were just kids. and the world broke us before we got the chance to ever truly live.”

“It’ll be better. For Madi, for my child. we’ll make the world a better place for us all.”

Chapter 35: For Our Future

Notes:

Sorry it's not the greatest. I'm really lacking motivation with this story but I'm trying to produce chapters. Always open to ideas for plot points. There's still like 9 months of timeline between now and Praimfaya that needs to be filled.
We have the basics: Island (and disconnecting the drones), ending ALIE (quite possibly "off screen" as majority voted just pretend they end her quick), bone marrow, possibly Abby/Raven going up to make some nightblood too, prepare the bunkers, somebody asked if any plants could be shut down so its not as bad (any science people want to chime in if its even possible/how its done/timeline/ect?), praimfaya itself.
But there's...moments to be filled and development and side plots ect
Apologies if this doesn't make sense. I'm sick and have the 6 month old culprit of getting me sick sleeping on me.

“How have you been, Leksa?” Luna asks, hands hard at work repairing the net. Usually she did the tasks with the young members, but she needed to speak with Lexa and needed something to occupy herself as she spoke.

The young Commander was standing nearby, looking less Commander and more like the girl Luna once knew. Her clothes were simple and plain and her hair fell loose down her back in soft curls. Luna knew that if it wasn’t common knowledge that the Commander was on the rig, she’d be unrecognizable and blend right in.

“I’ve been alright,” Lexa says in a soft voice but her green eyes looked everywhere but at her former friend.

“Don’t lie to me.” Luna has an authority in her voice like an older sister as if years hadn’t passed since their childhood at Polis. She eyed the girl. Sometimes she forgot how young she was.

“I’m not. I have Clarke, Madi and Aden. Anya and Gustus are alive. My Natblidas are all going to live. We won the war against the mountain. We’re changing the fate of our people. I’m okay.”

“And the man who raised you, who killed you before, this time dragged you to the woman who’s wanted you dead since you were a little girl. Did you do it? Execute him?”

“I did.”

“And you’re okay?”

“I’m getting there,” she admits, hands fidgeting with a knot, eyes downcast still.

“And Nia? You executed her?”

“Um…yes.”

“Why do you sound more upset at executing Nia over Titus? What happened there?”

“I lost myself for a moment. I beheaded her in front of everyone. Then I ran off into the woods and sat there for hours.”

“I would have done worse. I would’ve probably tortured her and put her head on a spike.”

“That’s not you.”

“You don’t know me. Not anymore. The girl you knew died that day in the arena with her brother. Just like the little girl I knew died the day she killed the rest of the Natblidas and became Heda at eleven years old.”

“No. That little girl is still in me. I see glimpses of her sometimes. Now more than ever when I’m around Madi.”

“Your daughter.”

“She’s…her mother is alive. She’s in Shallow Valley right now. She let us take Madi to keep her safe, not to replace her as her new parents. Madi though…her parents hid her for years. She never stepped out of her hut and lived under the floor. And then they died in front of her during Praimfaya. Clarke found her and raised her. Clarke was her mother. So to Madi, she’s still her mother.”

“But she doesn’t see you as a parent?”

“She does. She keeps trying to call me her mother. I don’t know what to do about it. Clarke makes it look so easy. My mother, I loved her. But she didn’t raise me. Anya did. And then Titus. And I was raised under the notion that love was weakness and Commander’s cannot have a family. I know she’s safe, the clans adore her. It’s not her. I never saw this happening, you know? I didn’t think I would have any future. I was sure from a very young age that I’d grow up and be Commander. Then I went to Polis and I was sure one day, I would die in the conclave. Then I became Commander and I thought I could love, and then Costia’s head was delivered to me in the middle of the night to the foot of my bed. I closed myself off from love. I never saw Clarke coming. I fell in love with her so fast and so hard. And our story was cut so short. This time I was hesitant to move on, like the moment we fell so deeply in love that someone would take her from me.”

“Maybe deep down you feel the same about Madi? Losing a lover is hard, losing a child is worse.” She knew from experience. The pain of holding Adria as the child took her final breaths would be forever engraved in her mind. The pain would haunt her, even with the child alive and well again.

“And it was me who was almost lost because I trusted Titus even after everything.”

“You have a good heart, Lexa. You always have. That’s why I always knew you’d be one of the greatest Commander’s the clans would ever see.”

“You would have been a pretty damn good Commander, you know. You have a good heart too, and you were so smart. You always knew what to say to me. When you come, you should do some training with my Natblidas. Maybe talk to them. You would love Aden. He’s so wise and brave and kind. And he’s skilled. He’s better than I was at his age.”

“How old is he now?” Luna remembered him as the small child who ran around the halls, far too young to be there. He had been abandoned at the tower as just a babe. “He was five then, wasn’t he?”

“Yes.”

“So he’s what? Eleven now? Twelve?”

“Eleven. He’ll be twelve soon.”

“Has it only been six years since then?”

“Feels like a lifetime ago, doesn’t it?”

“It does. The ache Aleo left hasn’t ever really left. Sometimes days go by where I don’t remember, but the times I do…”

“Hurts like hell.”

Luna nods. “You’re no stranger to pain either.”

“I play it in my mind sometimes. I see your sword piercing thorough Aleo, the bodies of all the other novitiates lying in pools of blood, Costia’s head in a box, news of my mother’s disappearance, Clarke handing me Anya’s braid, driving a sword through Gustus myself, my world going dark, being told of my Natblida’s being killed in their sleep, driving the sword through Titus, Nia’s head hitting the ground.”

“I see it too sometimes. Aleo. Countless others. I see Derrick, knowing I…killed him. ALIE took him over. I lost so many guards. I see my people dying on the rig as they eat sick fish, the elders and the younger children dying first. See them die on the way to Arkadia and unable to even do pyres. Sees them die in Arkadia. See Adria taking her last pain filled breath in my arms. I see the man dying painfully in the radiation chamber. I see blisters forming on others in the acid rain. I see my victims fall in the conclave. We all have our demons.”

“But we have to do better. We need to fix our broken world and not leave it for the children of the future to deal with.”

“You’re not just doing it for the future. You’re doing it for your daughter.”

She thinks of Madi, black curls bouncing as the runs, bright blue eyes, and freckles across her nose. Then she thinks of Aden, hair almost as golden a Clarke’s and blue eyes that looked into your soul. “My kids.”

“Aden’s right there on Madi’s level now?”

“I love all of my Natblidas. Aden, he just…”

“Is something more.”

“He always has been. There’s not…a big gap in our ages though.”

“So? I’m not that much older than you and Adria’s a bit older than Aden. So there’s pretty similar age difference between us, too. Still gonna call her my daughter.”

“That’s the first time I’ve heard you say that.”

“And I’ve yet to actually hear you say the words daughter or son. Just ‘my kids.’”

“Little steps.”

“Alright. Come, I’m hungry. You must be too. We’ll find your lover before she gets into any trouble,” Lexa chuckled at that, “and I’ll introduce you to my daughter.”

“I’d like that.”

The two headed back inside, leaving the freshly repaired net hanging to be used another day.

Chapter 36: Luna

Notes:

I didn't have a set plan on Luna and Lincoln's backstory going in, I started it a bit apprehensive and then a short backstory turned into well over 2k words of backstory. And it's just the tip of the iceberg. Unlike Lexa/Luna who only knew each other as novitiates, Lincoln/Luna knew each other post conclave. I have no idea when they met at all, but I could picture them meeting as kids both wanting a better world.

Next chapter we'll see Clexa and our characters such as Octavia and Madi back in TonDC I promise

Luna was thirteen years old when she stood in the arena staring down at her fifteen year old brother’s body. His dark blood pooled out, seeping under her boots.

It was minutes later when eleven year old Lexa’s name was drawn next. The youngster was like a sister to her. She followed her, snuck out with her, got sweets with her, and sometimes slept in her bed with her. She had killed her brother. And now she would have to kill the little girl she loved like a sister.

She had just a few minutes to catch her breath. And she did what felt like the only rational thing in that moment: she fled. She didn’t want it. She didn’t want to be Commander. She didn’t want to pay that price.

She got a glimpse of Lexa, in her armor and braided brown curls and charcoal paint around forest green eyes. She wanted to say goodbye. To hug her, to tell her she could do it. Tell her that she could live. Every second she stayed was a second closer to being caught and if she said goodbye…

She slipped through the crowd, feet moving quickly as she ran. She swiped at her own paint desperately, not missing a few confused looks. She ran and ran. She ran to where she knew there was a gap in the wall. Aleo had shown her and Lexa one day and she briefly wondered why he made sure they knew where it was but never used it. Maybe he knew that one day she’d need it.

She ran and ran, into the woods, as far from civilization as she could.

The sky was darkening when she heard the triumphant sound ringing checkpoint to checkpoint alerting that there was a new Commander. She prayed it was Lexa.

She had lost track of the days as she stumbled around. She was afraid of stopping by a trader post for supplies for risk of being seen, drinking water from streams, and even resorting to murky puddles from the constant rain from the last few days. She ate berries off of bushes and bugs from under rocks. It never satisfied her or renewed her energy fully but it kept her alive.

She was soaked to the bone from the constant rain when she stumbled upon a lake. She was weighing the odds of catching a fish with her lack of supplies. She was already soaked so she didn’t see the harm. She was only knee deep when she heard a voice ask, “want a net?” She spun around so fast she slipped and fell in the water, fully submerged for a moment. She resurfaces and gets up shakily.

“Who are you?” she demands, glaring at the stranger. He’s a boy who looked the same age as her. He had a hunting spear and a net on him but she didn’t spy any other weapons.

“Lincoln kom Trikru. You are?”

“L…Lyla kom…Floukru.”

“You’re a long way from the sea,” he comments but it’s not accusatory.

“I…got lost. A long time ago. My family…died.”

“I’m sorry.” He walked over towards her and she doesn’t flee. She watches him carefully though. “Do you want to use my net? I came here to fish. You won’t be very successful without a net. You should practice catching fish if you’re to return home to the sea.”

“Thanks…” she takes the net from him.

The two young teens spent hours out on the lake. They caught what they deemed as enough fish and hauled them to shore. Lincoln started a fire which Luna wasn’t sure how with how damp the wood and leaves were. He said growing up in Trikru where it was all woods and rained half the year meant that they had their ways of unearthing the dry stuff. Lincoln gutted the fish then handed them to Luna, who peeled the scales off and skewered them before placing over the fire. Before long, they had plenty of cooked fish to eat.

“You caught all of this for just you?” she questions.

“For us.”

“Duh,” she rolls her eyes. “But nobody else…?”

“My mother died when I was real young.” He sighs. “Azgeda.” Luna makes a face which told him she knew the terrors of the rogue clan. “My father was never the same. It’s his goal to make me strong and fearless and a warrior. I don’t want to hurt or kill anybody.”

“Me either,” Luna whispers, shaking softly as she remembers the feeling of her sword impaling her brother.

“I’m going to the sea. I can bring you with me.”

“Why are you going there?”

“They’re peaceful people. They don’t always engage with the other clans. I want to see a part of the world that isn’t all trees and see a life where it’s not all violence before I decide what my path will be. What I want, not my father, not my clan.”

“You are brave, Lincoln kom Trikru. That’s the bravest thing I’ve ever heard anybody say.”

****

It took Luna a full day and a half before she worked up the courage to ask, “Have you heard about the new Commander?”

“Everyone heard about that,” he gives her a funny look. “Those trumpets aren’t exactly quiet.”

“I know—I heard them. But do you know who it is?”

He suddenly looks proud. “Trikru.”

There were two Trikru novitiates—Lexa, and a boy her age, Kaden.

“I heard in my travels there were two Trikru novitiates. A boy and a girl.”

“Girl,” Lincoln nods. “Lexa kom Trikru. I met her a few times, you know. Anya was one of the village chiefs. Lexa was her second before she was called to Polis. She didn’t really play with other kids, she wasn’t allowed. She trained and observed. She talked to us though. Said it was her duty to know who her people were if she ever became Heda. She was eight? Nine? I feel pretty confident in our future with her up in that tower.”

“Yeah…me, too.”

They traveled in comfortable silence, in small talk. Luna had heard stories of the sea but she had never seen it. There was a youngster a year younger than Lexa who was Floukru, but the boy kept mostly to himself. She longed for the mountains she grew up, adjusted to walking through the dense forest and prepared herself to live at the salty sea.

“Have you been? To Floukru?”

“No but I met a friend on my travels who had. He said it’s a magnificent place. They avoid bloodshed when possible and keep to themselves and live in the middle of the sea!”

“In the middle of it?!”

“That’s what he said!”

“How?”

“I don’t know. Here, look.” He paused his step and pulled something out of his satchel. She observed the small branch curiously. “He gave me the map we’re following. Said to find the spot with the pillars of rocks, light a fire as the sun sets and toss the branches in the flame. It’ll signal them and they will bring me to the sea. He said I am to say, ‘I am Lincoln kom Trikru and I seek safe passage.’ So that is what we’ll say.”

“How far away are we?”

“We should get there by sundown tomorrow if we keep a good pace. We should make camp soon, get some sleep before we finish our travels.”

“Okay.” She hadn’t realized how tired and hungry she was. He pulled dried meat out his satchel as if he read her mind and she took it when he offered it with a smile.

****

“I need to tell you something. It’s important.”

The two were building the fire as the sky began to grow dark. Luna shifted nervously.

“What is it?”

“My name is not Lyla. It’s Luna. And I’m not from Floukru. But I want to live there.”

“What? Why did you tell me that then?”

“I ran away.”

“From home?”

“From the conclave.”

“From the—what?”

“You don’t…there’s probably people looking for me.”

Lincoln shrugged. “I haven’t heard about that. So…you’re a Natblida.”

“I am.”

“Why’d you run?” There’s no judgment and for that Luna is grateful.

“I didn’t want to win.” He stops what he’s doing and stares at her, confusion clouding his face. “I didn’t want to pay the price. I had a brother, he was two years older than me. I was paired with him,” she bites her lip, sniffing back tears. “I killed my brother. I put my sword right through him. I watched his face scrunch up in pain, watched the life fade away and his blood pooled out all around. They paired me with Lexa next. She wanted it, she’d be a great Commander. I wouldn’t. I couldn’t make those impossible choices. I couldn’t send out armies, watch bloodshed and cause it myself. She’s a good kid. I hope she can do it. That it doesn’t destroy her. She’s got a good heart. Maybe one day she’ll change the world.”

“That’d be nice to see. I hate the violence and hurt and anger. And the division. I wish everyone could just be…one people. One kru.”

“That’s a nice thought.”

“I want a better world for my family one day.”

“You want a family?” she scrunched her face up. Not that she spent much time with other children outside of the novitiates, but she didn’t think having a family was something on most thirteen year old boys minds. Then again, most wanted to be warriors, not peace keepers.

“Don’t you?”

Luna had never entertained that idea. She knew from a very young age she’d grow to one day either die or be Heda. Heda’s didn’t have families. Their duty was to the clans and not themselves. Now that she fled, she was focused on hiding. And even in Floukru harbored her, what if she one day had a child of her own? What if the child was born with the sacred blood? She couldn’t live every day in fear for a child. So she just shakes her head at him. No, the thought of a family terrified her.

“Because the baby could be a Nightblood?”

“Yeah,” she nudged pine needles with her boot.

“And no nightblood as far as we know ever had a baby so we don’t know the odds. It seems so random…your mom had two nightblood kids? And she’s red blood?”

“Yes. Imagine how proud she was when she learnt her second born was a nightblood. She had her hopes up for third times a charm but baby number three was red blooded.”

“You have another sibling?”

“Met him a few times. He was born not long before we left for Polis. Visited a few times. Probably doesn’t even remember me. He’s like…five now? But anyways, I hate the sacred blood.”

“I hate it too,” he answers and she smiles.

Luna decides that Lincoln is her favorite person.

“Luna!” He points when he sees the men emerge from the water.

“Who are you? Why did you signal?” they ask. If they were surprised by two children showing up, it didn’t show.

“I am Lincoln kom Trikru and this is my companion Luna and we seek safe passage.”

The green liquid they decided was gross just moments before the world turned upside down and they fell backwards onto the ground, the world around them fading to black.

****

Luna decided that if she never left the rig again she’d be okay.

She loved the peace. She loved watching the cargo arrive. Loved story times and mending nets and classes. She loved that she was allowed to teach classes—self-defense, just in case. She loved the mystery of sharks existing. Loved catching, cooking, and eating fish.

She loved doing all of the above with Lincoln.

She liked him. a little more each day. But she’d never tell him. She never wanted a family and he desired one. So she settled with being his best friend.

It lasted almost year.

Lincoln’s adventure was up. He spent nearly a year on the rig but he declared he wanted to see more of the world before returning to Trikru.

She smiled and hugged him and made him promise he’d write and visit. She knew there was a chance she’d never see him again and she added him to the list of lost.

Aleo, who was gone forever.

Lexa, who lived in the tower she fled. They’d have her head if she ever returned.

Lincoln, who had a world to see and a family to make.

She didn’t cry when he said goodbye. Didn’t cry when the cargo ship was shipped out.

She only cried hours later when she returned to the room and only saw one bed, one set of belongings. And for the first time since the conclave, she felt utterly alone.

Days later, a small orphaned child was delivered to the rig after a battle. A little thing that followed Luna around and asked questions in a little voice and climbed into her bed at night and giggled at everything. She came with nothing but her name. But Luna made sure that Adria would have everything she needed in more, everything she longed for once upon a time when she was just a little girl with nothing but a name and the color of her blood.

Now all she longed for was for the broken world to mend, if even just a little.

Chapter 37: For as Long as You Want

Notes:

This may be my last chapter in a while.
The universe has decided it doesn't want me to exist or something.
The other day my home burned along with all my belongings and worse, several of my pets including my dog who was in service dog training and possibly one of the cats.

I lost my laptop. I only now have remembered I do have Word on my phone and didn't actually lose my work. This chapter is not long or edited, it's just wherever I left off last time I wrote.

Maybe I'll pick up and write soon as a coping mechanism. Or maybe I won't in a while. At this time I am not sure.

How much longer?” Madi asked, pushing her food around on her plate. “They’ve been gone a week now.”

“I don’t know, Madi,” Octavia answers with a sigh—she wished she had an answer for the child. “I want them to come back soon, too.”

“Lincoln?”

“Yeah.”

“They’re safe, right? All of them together?”

“They should be.”

“Do you think Luna will come back with them?”

“I hope so.”

“Me, too. I want to meet her, see what she’s like outside of stories. Can I go play with Lucy and Zach?”

“If you eat your lunch instead of playing with it.”

“Are you going to eat yours?” Madi's blue eyes looked from the untouched meat on Octavia’s plate back up to her.

Octavia swallows. She knew she needed the protein and strength for what’s to come. And she knew her feeling ill wasn’t from morning sickness, she knew it was from her past memories that plagued her. She picked a piece up cautiously. She promised Indra she would try. She was grateful Madi turned her attention to her own food, eating quickly so she could go play with her friends.

“Go on,” she tells Madi when she sees her finish her last bite.

“Thank you!” Madi bolted out of the tent. Octavia got up and went to the entrance and watched as Madi ran across the camp over to where she could make out Lucy and Zach who were playing with a few other kids from the village.

She sits back down, staring at her plate. Her face turns to disgust and she pushed it away before leaving the tent altogether to find something to due to pass the time.

****

“Madi’s going to be so happy when we get home,” Clarke says, rubbing her horse’s neck.

“Home?” Lexa asks from atop her own horse, soft smile on her face.

“For now. We know that Polis won’t be home after Praimfaya. TonDC won’t exist either. But it’s home, for now. Until the valley. Or wherever. Technically we have the stone but I don’t think anyone wants to touch that thing quite yet.”

“From what everyone has said, I’d agree with that. I’d like to not have a war with another kind of people from another planet and put our kids in danger.”

“Our kids?”

“Clarke.”

“Lexa.”

Lexa bites back a smile. “Fine…yes. Our kids. Those two treat each other like brother and sister. It’s nice to see.”

“It is,” Clarke nods. “They’re going to make it, right?”

“They have to. There won’t be the fight for Heda like they both faced in different ways before. It is my goal to change the ways a Commander is chosen before I die.”

“And that better not be for a very long time, Lexa. I mean it. It’s not just your people and a budding romance with me. We’re together, changing the world, and responsible for two children now.”

“I don’t plan on going anywhere, Clarke. I swear.” She holds her hand not holding the reins out and Clarke reaches out and takes it, threading her fingers through hers. “I love you.”

Clarke smiles at that. “I love you.”

The group rode on for a few more hours, Lexa and Clarke’s hands threaded together for most of it. They let go to pick up the pace a bit in hopes to make it before the sun set.

The sky was painted in hues of purples and oranges as they horses stepped foot into the village. They were dismounting and handing their horses off when they heard the yell. Madi ran over, massive smile on her face. “Mom!”

She reached Clarke first, leaping up into her arms. Clarke stumbled back a few steps, hugging the child tightly with a brilliant smile. Once Madi was satisfied with Clarke’s embrace she reached out and was passed over into Lexa’s arms. Madi wraps her arms around her neck, laying her head on her shoulder contentedly as she feels Clarke wrap her arms around the both of them.

She smiles as Aden runs over with a massive smile on his face. “You’re back!”

“We are.” It’s Lexa that answers, holding a free arm out. He throws his arm around her and Madi, his other arm finding Clarke.

This was home.

Not far from them Lincoln picked up his pace and caught Octavia in his arms, holding her closely but carefully.

“I’m so happy you’re back,” she breathes into chest. “I was worried and Madi was worried.”

“I promised I’d always come back to you,” he says softly into her hair, pressing his lips to the top of her head. “Are you doing okay?”

“Yeah,” she sighs.

“And is…?”

“It’s okay, too.”

“Good. Have you seen anyone?” Octavia nods and the look on her face answers his unanswered question. “Abby would probably be a lot of help.”

“Not you, too.”

“Indra?”

“Yes. You both suggest her. I do not want to see her. I’d be happy to never see her again.”

“Okay,” he puts his hands up. “It’s your call. Unless there’s an emergency.”

“It better be an emergency where I’m not conscious.”

He snorts. “Stubborn woman…does Bellamy know?”

She groans. “No. Just Indra. Madi was worried that I was sick and got her. Indra guessed. I told her I’d tell Bell when you returned. Same with Clarke and Lexa…before Madi accidentally spills. Then there’s still Raven, Miller, Gaia…” She sighs deeply. “The list surely goes on.”

“We'll get through it together. Okay?”

“Okay.”

She sinks deeper into her arms. “For now I just want to stay like this. I want to enjoy that we are together again. We need this moment.”

“Maybe we should go to our tent and we can stay like this here for as long as you want.”

Chapter 38: Like You

Notes:

I know I said yesterday probably last update. And there's a very real chance this might be last for a while. But currently my family of 4 is staying at my older brothers apartment who's a family of 4. The room I'm staying in had my 7 yr old niece asleep in. So I was stuck in the living room where my other brothers took over the TV, again. And I'm too anxious to put on headphones and not hear anything so watching stuff on my phone wasn't an option. So went with attempting (and apparently succeededing) to write trumped sitting in silence until I was tired enough for bed.

Here's some Clexa, little bit of Linctavia and Becho and some Ranya cause they've been lacking in their "screentime"

“How long do we have?” Lexa asks. Clarke's fingers trailing down her bare side. She smiles when her lover squirms a little, the action tickling her.

“Still some time,” Clarke says not even trying to hide her smile. “My mom still has to get here from Arkadia and talk with Luna. She’ll probably want to visit with the kids a bit before we get into serious talk. You know Ontari volunteered to come with and help with nightblood? She said it’s a way for her to make up a bit more for her past.”

“I heard. It’s appreciated. I really don’t want to resort to any child being used.”

“Me, either. My mom and Raven will have a lot of planning to do before we leave for the island.”

“We don’t need to go.”

“You’re going, so I’m going. It's just for a short time.”

“Short enough to bring the kids with us?” Lexa’s voice is hopeful.

Clarke smiles. “Was already thinking that.”

“Good. I’d hate to be separated from them again. Those weeks in Floukru were hard enough.”

“I know. Now I understand my moms anxiety every time I kept taking off—and I was a teenager, not a little girl.”

“Your mom and you may not always see things the same, but you have a good family.”

“I guess I do…even better now. You’re my family, both kids are.”

“I love that your mother is looking forward to seeing Aden as much as Madi. He deserves a good family.”

“You do, too.”

“It’s a good thing I have one,” she responds, moving closer to capture Clarke’s lips into a deep kiss, hands greedily roaming. Gaia had the kids with the other Natblida's, so they knew they had plenty of time alone.

****

Octavia and Lincoln were seated in Bellamy and Echo's tent, sitting across from them. Bellamy bounced his knee anxiously as he wondered what was wrong as Echo waited patiently. Lincoln was calm, but Octavia’s worry just fueled her brother’s.

“We need to talk to you,” was all Octavia said and that was several minutes ago.

“O?” Bellamy tries with a furrow in his brows.

“I, um…don’t be mad, please?”

“Mad? What did—what’s going on.”.

“We weren’t trying. Not with Praimfaya literally like nine months away.”

“Jesus, O. I thought you were hurt or sick or—or something! You were acting like it.”

“You’re not mad?”

“I mean, I’m not thrilled but I’m not shocked. You’ve never been one to follow the flow of things anyways.” He glances at Echo.

“Don’t even.”

“Okay.”

“Don’t even what?” Octavia raises his eyebrows.”

“Don’t even say anything because now he can borrow your child instead of all his ‘after Praimfaya' stuff.”

“See, we kept saying ‘after Praimfaya' too and well…”

“Don’t tell her that,” Bellamy groans and Lincoln chuckles sympathetically. “Now she’s not going to do anything even carefully.”

“Okay ew, I don’t need to think about the things you do. You’re my brother. Also Echo, so far I do not recommend. Morning sickness fucking sucks. And eating is a struggle. Always tired. Oh and goodbye riding, goodbye sparring, goodbye life.”

“Octavia!” both Lincoln and Bellamy say together.

“Is it really that bad?” Lincoln asks in concern.

“Or are you just trying to ruin my sex life?”

“Bellamy, gross!”

“Keep talking about our sex life to your sister and you’ll ruin it yourself,” Echo warns with a smirk.

“She started it.”

“No I didn’t!”

“Bellamy!” Echo says sternly at the same time Lincoln chastises, “Octavia.”

“Want to go bother Raven a little before Abby shows up and takes all her attention?” Echo suggests. “We can leave before Abby gets there. Maybe you’ll be less bored and bother your brother less. You get to visit him. You bother him and I’m the one who lives with him.” She jumps away from Bellamy’s half annoyed swat. He wasn’t going to complain—it was nice to see his sister and lover getting along even if it was at his expense.

“Behave,” Bellamy says to the both of them and Lincoln makes a sound in agrreance and a grumble that “you think they actually will?”

Bellamy didn’t think they would. But one could hope.

****

“How long will you be gone?” Anya asks, glancing up from her sword.

By now she was used to the strange tech taking up part of her tent. Raven spent much of her time in her tent, demanding her companionship and silence at different times. Anya liked the quiet but secretly enjoyed their chats.

“A few weeks probably,” Raven answers.

“And you’re going to space?”

“Briefly. If we even do. We probably will. We just need a Zero Gravity environment to get it to bind. We could just do bone marrow but that’ll be a lot of work. We can and will get started with it especially since we have all three Nightbloods volunteering.”

“Will it be safe for Lexa for this to happen?”

“Trust me. The only person ever loved more than our Commander was probably Bekka Praimheda herself. And after we all survive Praimfaya, Lexa may as well be a new and improved god amongst us to your people. Very few look down at her. And with the amount of people backing her those few would never try an assassination. Plus very few will know about it because she’ll be at the island helping planning as far as anyone knows. By the time we return she’ll be well into her recovery. You could come, you know. It’d make you feel better, right? Be by her side while she’s more defenseless as usual? Though I swear it’s not actually as bad as it sounds if done right and Abby will do it right.”

“Someone has to stay and help Indra run and protect the village,” Anya tells her.

“I knew you'd say that,” Raven admits with a sheepish look, “so I talked to Gustus.” Anya raises her eyebrows expectantly. “He agreed to stay and let you go with Lexa as a protector if you wished.”

“You negotiated with Gustus…who you usually avoid when possible?”

“Yes.”

“You did that for Lexa?”

“Yeah. Well a little.”

“A little?”

“I mostly did it for you…and me.”

“For you?”

“Yes,” Raven groans. “I don’t just hang around anyone for no reason.”

“I’ve noticed.”

“Yeah. So I’d like someone I like being around with me.”

“You like me being around you?”

“Yes—are all you people so…” she trails off when she sees the smirk. “You’re just messing with me.”

“I do want to know what you meant by ‘are all you people.’”

“So difficult,” Raven finishes. “Like Bellamy having to spell it out to Echo. And Clarke to Lexa in other aspects. Lexa was the one who liked Clarke first.”

“Spell it out?”

“Okay. Um…means like, tell them very clearly. Instead of just talking about it they had to pretty much say ‘I am in love with you.’”

“And that’s what you, um…”

“No. Not fully. I’m not…there. Yet. But if you change it to like then you’ll be pretty spot on.”

“…oh.”

“Yeah…”

“I think…I’ll let Gustus know I will be trading places with him for the trip.”

Raven didn’t say anything. She just smiled.

Chapter 39: The New Normal

Notes:

I should hopefully be semi back. Someone donated a laptop to me, though it's much different than my old one so it's been difficult to type but it is much easier than writing on my phone. And it has no caps lock or right click so was a bit f expirimenting to get this chapter done.

For those who have said they were going to be waiting for updates: My family is living in a hotel for now. Our missing cats were unfortuanately found in the house. They never made it out despite what we were told. More than one person said they saw Autumn and she's not a cat that can be mistaken (she was a calico and we don't have stray calicos here). So it hit hard, mostly my brothers and mother as one cat was one of my brothers and the other was my moms/little brothers. But we're all managing best we can. I returned to work which was helpful as my job is working with therapy horses. And one of them is my therapy horse. So seeing him has helped. As has seeing the two horses I own (they live at a different barn than my work). Slowly life is getting to some semblance of "normal"

“What’s that?” Aden asks. Abby pulled the stethoscope from around her neck and handed it to the boy.  

“This is a stethoscope,” she tells him.  

“What’s it for?” he asks curiously.  

“It helps you listen to people’s heartbeats.” His eyes widen in excitement. “Here, put these in your ears.” Aden puts them in his ears cautiously. Abby pressed the end to her chest and Aden’s eyes widened.  

“I hear it!”  

“My turn!” Madi says, pulling at Aden’s arm.  

“Patience, Madi,” Abby tells her granddaughter. “Do you want to let him listen to your heartbeat?”  

“Yeah,” she nods, curls bouncing.  

“It’s a little cold,” Abby warns before placing the end against her chest. She giggles a little in agreeance.  

“Her heart is so much faster than yours,” Aden says, taking end pieces out of his ear and passing the tool to Madi.  

“She’s littler and more excitable,” Abby explains as Madi puts the ends in her little ears.  

“Can I listen to yours?” Madi asks Aden who nods. She presses the end to his chest. “Woah!”  

“This is really cool,” Aden comments. “Thank you for this.”  

“You’re welcome. Anything for my grandchildren.”  

Madi beams at that, and Aden allows a tentative smile. The whole having family thing was new to him, and while he sometimes felt a little awkward and out of place, he also felt good. He wasn’t sure if he thought of Lexa and Clarke as his parents , but they were family to him, and he was sure of that.  

“So, I can call you Grandma then, right?” Madi asks. Abby paused at that. “I call Clarke and Lexa Mom now. Clarke likes that. Lexa stopped trying to stop me now.”  

“You usually say Nomon to them,” Aden corrects cheekily. Madi swats at him with a playful scowl.  

“Be nice,” Abby tells them but there’s no bite to it. She smiles and it’s almost sad. “I wish Clarke could have grown up with a sibling.”  

“She had Wells. He was kind of like a brother, right?”  

“Kind of. I have no experience, but I think having an actual sibling would feel different.”  

Aden looks at Madi. “I grew up with all the other Natblidas and we’re all close, but it feels a lot different with you...because I kind of feel like you’re my sister now.”  

“I think so, too,” Madi nods confidently. “I’ll ask Octavia before she brings us to Gaia’s class later. She can tell us what having a big brother is like. I bet I'll agree with her. And you should ask Bellamy what having a little sister is like! Then we can compare what they said.”  

“That sounds good,” Aden agrees.  

“How are they?” Abby asks hesitantly.  

“You mean how is Octavia ?” Madi asks cheekily.  

“You should ask her yourself,” Aden says quickly, giving Madi a look that told her to keep her mouth shut. Abby's brows furrow in concern.  

“Is everything alright?”  

“You should really just ask Octavia about it,” Aden tells her again. “She’s not hurt or anything. But it’s not our place to tell you. Especially with your... history .”  

“Our history?” Abby frowns. “She’s talking to you children about our past?”  

“ I told him,” Madi says with an apologetic grimace. “I have the mind of thirteen-year-old me but I'm as impulsive as five-year-old me. Mom says I don’t filter what I say, whatever that means.”  

Abby's face softens. “It’s alright, Madi.”  

“Octavia doesn’t talk about you, at least not to us. She's not Blodreina. She was never the only Blodreina. You and everyone else created her into that. You're the one who told us the story of the Dark Year where the villain was created in a group effort. Try to remember her as the girl she was before the bunker. She's that girl, too.”  

“You will be a force to be reckoned with when you’re a teenager again, Madi.”  

“I know,” she answers with a big smile.  

****  

“This is both impressive and nerve-wracking,” Raven makes out, eyes not leaving Anya and Lexa who were sparring. Anya had been cleared to resume her normal activity, her injury from being shot at the mountain being completely healed. Apparently, that meant she had to have a serious sparring session with her former mentee. “I am glad they’re on our side.”  

“If they ever end up against us, I'll be jumping ship with them,” Clarke tells her. “I’d follow her anywhere.”  

“Well, if you jump ship, I have jump ship. Then O probably will, and Bellamy, and Echo, and Murphy and Emori. And Monty and Harper. Probably Jasper. Oh, and Lincoln if Octavia does. So, I mean, it wouldn’t be the worst thing.”  

Clarke slowly turns to look at her. “If anyone stages a coup, I'll let you inform all the ship jumping people then. That was well thought out.”  

“I mean, with what’s to come...”  

“With Praimfaya?”  

“There’s going to be people alive who weren’t before. For all we know, Blodreina won’t hold a candle to who might come out. I mean it’s going to be a much shorter bunker visit. Just a few weeks, right? A month or so if we’re all nightbloods? But a few weeks being trapped underground...there can’t be a Commander in every place keeping the peace and we all know Anya and Indra will be wherever Lexa is probably. And even if we all come out unscathed, that’s a small valley for twelve clans to coexist. And Diyoza and McCreary will be coming down at some point, though I hope Diyoza kills the bastard before he leaves cryo. But that’s a whole new people. And someone one day will be tempted with the anomaly stone and then we’ll have the Primes to deal with. Though we’ll get Gabriel too. And there’s Bardo and Skyring and all that fun stuff. But unlike the Primes at least we won’t have to deal with Anders, so maybe it won’t be so bad. And we know what the last war actually is. Thank god we already took out Sheidheda because Russel as Russel was not actually as bad as Russel as Sheidheda. Though Russel did try to burn us alive...”  

“Raven, I get it. I’m putting you in charge after Praimfaya.”  

“Please don’t. I'm not a leader. Though I appreciate being picked first,” she smiles.  

“Always. I told you I pick you first. That feels like forever ago.”  

“One hundred and thirty two years ago to be exact.”  

“Ha-ha.”  

“Okay more like seven and a half years ago. Do we count cryo?”  

“I don’t. We were asleep.”  

“Okay,” she shrugs.  

“Why do you two look so serious?” The two jump at Anya’s sudden voice. Clarke looks up and sees Anya staring at them and Lexa looking at them with a slightly concerned expression.  

“Raven is listing every single thing we have to look forward to,” Clarke responds drily. “From Praimfaya to the other planets.”  

“I’m a planner.”  

“I told her I'll put her in charge.”  

“Planner, not leader. I'll stay with the planning and fixing where I'm safe, thank you very much. You can lead the masses.”  

“Smart choice,” Anya says, sitting down with a wince.  

“Shouldn’t have sparred so much after sitting for a while, huh?” Raven says with a grin. She earned a scowl from that. “I tried to warn you, but you stubbornly ignored me.” Anya just grumbled quietly in response.  

****  

“Are you ready for the drive tomorrow?” Octavia asks, curled up beside Lincoln.  

“I am.”  

“Are you nervous?”  

“A little. Are you?”  

“A little. Maya has nothing but good things to say about Maria though. It should be fine. I can’t keep putting it off. Indra's threatened to get Abby if I don’t go soon,” she responds with a grimace. “Before she knew of our technology, she would have been totally fine with just Shayla. But nope, I should see a doctor and not just a healer.” She finishes her sentence with an eye roll.  

“You should see a doctor and not just a healer.”  

“I know, I know.”  

“Be easy on Indra. This is a first for her, too.”  

Octavia's face softens. “I know,” she sighs. There's a knock on the post outside the door. “That’s probably her right now.”  

“I’ll get it,” he says, getting up so she can stay curled up. He goes to the flap and pulls it open. He steps outside and she watches the flap for a moment with a confused frown. He's gone for a few minutes before he returns.  

“What’s wrong?”  

“Nothing.”  

“Lincoln?”  

He steps aside to allow who he was talking to enter. She sucks in a breath sharply and her soft features harden.  

“Abby.”  

Chapter 40: Abby

Notes:

As someone who is very much pro Octavia and very anti Abby, I hope this chapter came out as unbiased as I tried.

Next chapter will focus on our little Clexa family as they prepare for their travels to Becca's island. They're going to need a bigger ship to get the island this time apparently haha

“Abby.”   

“Hello, Octavia.”  

“What are you doing here?” the young woman folds her arms around her middle protectively. Green eyes flit over to Lincoln wondering why he let the older woman in. He knew how she felt about the doctor, so she wondered what Abby had said to him to convince him.   

“Trying to do better. That is what we are all supposed to be doing with our second chance, isn’t it?”  

“That’s not how you felt when we woke up from cryo even after you heard Monty’s message.”  

“The wounds were still pretty raw at that time,” she tells her. “I was still in a lot of pain from Marcus. And he actively ended up back in surgery which led to his death after you and him argued very shortly after waking up if you remember.”  

“So what, you came here to cast blame at me then?” she asks, anxiety bubbling in her chest. Lincoln takes a step closer to her.  

“No. To apologize.”  

“Seriously?”  

“Madi said some things that made me realize that things aren’t so...black and white. Not one single person was to blame.” She sighs and glances at Lincoln. “Can I speak with her alone?”  

“That’s up to her,” he says simply, crossing his arms.   

“Don’t go far?” Octavia asks softly after a moment of thought.   

“If you need me, just shout and I'll be right here,” he promises before pressing a kiss to her forehead. He gives Abby a look of warning before he leaves the tent, not straying far. He stood outside the tent like a guard, ready to storm back in the second he hears a sound of distress. He liked to think of himself as a peacekeeper, but there was not a line he wouldn’t cross for the woman he loved or his unborn child. Part of him hoped Octavia would let the doctor know about the baby, if only to lessen any stressful moments that may happen between the two.  

“May I sit?” Abby asks to break the tense silence after Lincoln disappeared from sight. Octavia just nods silently.   

“I’m sorry about everything,” the older woman admits.   

Octavia swallows hard. She knew that Abby wasn’t the only one who needed to apologize. “What I did...everything I did as Blodreina was me . I don’t want anyone to take the blame from me, I know what I did and who I became. I just needed to hear that you’re sorry for your part in what was created. ‘Eat or die.’ I didn't want to do that, but I did because you convinced me that was what was best for my people. I’m not mad that you convinced me, I’m mad that I had to do it on my own. I wasn’t a leader. I was nineteen. All I really needed was for all of you to stand by the decision you encouraged me to make. It wasn’t just you. It was everyone . But you and Indra were who I needed most and suddenly I was left alone to bare it all myself. I understood Clarke then, but I got no escape and nothing out of it. You know, I was jealous of her having Madi while I just kept losing and losing. I know I brought it upon myself, but I was so hurt and angry, and nobody stood by me, and nobody would listen to my side. Bellamy wouldn’t hear me out. Clarke wouldn’t, though her focus was on protecting Madi and not picking sides, I know that now. The only person who heard my story and believed me was Madi and oddly, Echo . Diyoza though, she was my saving grace. My story would have ended long before the reset if it weren’t for her.”  

“Diyoza from the Eligius ship?”  

“Yeah...that's a long story for another day. Does Kane still hate my existence?”  

“No. He did at first when he first woke up, but he does listen to others. He was overwhelmed by guilt at first, then upset at me for pushing eat or die specifically to make him eat, and then angry at you for Blodreina and then he was just angry at himself for not trying harder. And then he realized being angry at anyone would just set him backwards and he forgave himself and everyone. He is already on the do better train. He came to TonDC too, he’s insisting on talking to the Commander to see what he can do to make the transition to the clans thrown together again easier. He wants to start on a better note, so more people come out alive and unharmed. There'll be more people in the bunkers, more in the valley. He wanted to come when I said I was coming to speak with you, but I told him it would probably be easier if you saw just one of us at first.”  

“You’re right about that. If you both showed up, I would have kicked you both out instantly if Lincoln didn’t beat me to it.”  

“I figured that much. Having Lincoln back must feel great.”  

“It does. Though I often think I don’t deserve a man as good as him.” She chuckles softly. “He knows everything . Skairipa, Blodreina. Who I was at Sanctum and Skyring and Bardo. He never judged me or held it against me. He heard me and he knows the real me.” She eyes her suddenly. “Why are you asking me all of this?”  

“I’m just making small talk,” Abby says simply. “I’m not sure what to ask you anymore. I don’t think I ever knew what to ask you. I usually let Clarke take the lead with you.”  

“Clarke and I butted heads. A lot .”  

“You were both stubborn teenagers. I was never surprised when any of you kids butted heads with each other. Especially you, Clarke and Raven.”  

“You should have seen my brother and Clarke before the Ark came down. Talk about butting heads. They fought over leadership before they decided to share it.”  

“I can picture that.”  

“Bellamy telling me to stay in camp. Clarke asking me to sneak out.”  

“Let me guess. You listened to Clarke.”  

“She wanted me to sneak out to get information from Lincoln. Of course, I did.”  

Abby chuckles before her face turned serious. “I’m a doctor.”  

“I’m aware.”  

Abby nods at her arms still wrapped around her middle. “At first, I thought it was a coping comfort method. But then I realized I've never seen you do that. Then the doctor in me wondered if something was wrong. If you were sick or injured. But you don’t look sick or injured. But there’s another option, isn’t there?” Octavia shifts and Abby sees it on her face—she was right. “Lincoln hovering, worried about stress, the protective holding.”  

“So?”  

“How far along are you?”  

“Few months?”  

“Have you seen a doctor?”  

“Healer. Was going to make a trip to Mount Weather.”  

“Arkadia is closer than Mount Weather. Less stress to travel. Just so you know for when you decide you need to see a doctor.”  

“You’re not going to make a comment on how there’s only seven months until Praimfaya and how stupid it is?”  

“Well did you try for this?”  

“No!”  

“I didn’t think so. And I imagine you’ve already had your fair share of people reminding you of when your due date is. I am going to want to work closely with you soon though. I think bringing you to the island with us would be a good idea come to think of it...”  

“You just said I should have a shorter travel for less stress, Abby.”  

“I know. But the island has a better lab. We’re turning people into Nightbloods. You'll get bone marrow but it’s unclear if that’ll do anything for the baby. And the radiation levels will have risen too much by the time you give birth and it’d be risky to give a newborn bone marrow anyways...yes, it’ll be best to study what to do for the baby at the lab.”  

“Um...”  

“Let me call Lincoln back in here. I'll tell all of this to him. And maybe Indra. We leave in a few days we need to figure this out before we go. But I think this will be most beneficial.”  

Octavia watched wordlessly as Abby got Lincoln back in the tent, wondering what the hell just happened.  

Chapter 41: The Island

“How long do you think we’ll be gone?” Aden asks as he pulls the strap over his shoulder. They were preparing to head for the boat that would bring them to Becca’s Island.  

“A few weeks at most, I think. We know what to do there, we just have to do it,” Clarke tells him. “We’re running on limited time so the sooner we do what we have to do, the more people who will live.” 

“And what we need to do is to make Nightblood,” Madi says, nodding to herself. “Indra and Gustus are who is in charge here until we come back?” 

“Yes,” Lexa answers, “and Roan’s stepped up, too. Most of the clans respect his authority now. He wants humanity to survive, not just Azgeda. Bellamy is here to speak for Skaikru if necessary.” 

“Are there a lot of people coming with us?” 

“Not a whole lot, but more than initially planned.” Clarke answers this time. 

“Who’s coming with us?” 

“Don’t you want to just wait and see? We are heading for the boat soon. Like, we’re literally finishing packing because we’re heading out in like an hour .” 

“No, I want to know now so I can brace myself.” 

Clarke shakes her head at the youngster while Lexa hides an amused smile. “Brace yourself?”  

“Just knowing Kane and Octavia are going to be meeting again on the boat is enough to need to brace,” Madi insists.  

“She has a point,” Lexa points out. 

“It’ll be fine ,” Clarke insists, looking from Lexa to Madi. “Don’t you agree, Aden?” 

“Sure,” he shrugs, not knowing Kane, or the history, enough to have the same worry that Madi had. “Only a fool would pick a fight in front of Heda or you. Especially with the person being pregnant and Chief of TonDC’s second.” 

“ Also a good point.”  

“So, who’s coming?” Madi asks again.  

“Us,” Aden says with a smirk and Madi sticks her tongue out at him. “And Octavia, Kane and Abby.” 

“Well aware,” Madi says dryly. “Mom?”  

“Raven, Anya, Lincoln,” Clarke answers. “Echo, Ontari.” 

“Onatri because she’s a Natblida. Echo?” 

“For Bellamy. And extra protection.” 

“Is Jackson coming?” 

“No, he’s staying here this time. Miller, too. Echo is kind of taking over Miller’s role last time and I’m more so taking over for Jackson. Jackson is needed to prep and prepare everyone for their doses so once we finish, we can get it out as fast as possible.” 

“And Anya?” 

“With both Gustus and Indra staying here, Anya is my protector even though I probably wouldn’t need one. But we all agreed that we can't be too safe.”  

“And that’s not the only reason she’s coming,” Clarke snickers. 

“Because she always sticks around Raven even though she seems annoyed with her often,” Aden says. “Adults and their feelings can be quite confusing.” 

“That’s the truth!” Madi agrees. “You both can be super confusing,” Madi informs Clarke and Lexa.  

“Thanks, Mads,” Clarke shakes her head. She's only a teenager but she couldn’t argue with her. She was serious and adult like from a very young age, and she knew it was the same for Lexa. “Come on, let’s go. We’re taking a rover to the boat.” 

“Who’s driving the rovers back?” 

“Jackson and Miller are giving us rides to the boat.” 

“More than one rover?”  

“We aren’t all squishing into one,” Lexa says, wrinkling her nose. “We are riding in one with Lincoln, Octavia and Anya. Abby, Kane, Raven, Ontari, Bellamy and Echo are taking the other.”  

“Oh okay.”  

The four made their way to the where the rovers were waiting. They see Octavia and Lincoln already there, the former leaning against the vehicle partially behind Lincoln.  

“Are you hiding?” Clarke chuckles.  

“Maybe,” Octavia answers.  

“Why not wait inside?”  

“Staying with Lincoln. 

Clarke shrugs. She couldn’t really argue that. Anya is there in a flash, ruffling the top of Madi’s head earning both a whine and a giggle. Miller is there and he opens the door to hop into the driver’s seat.  

“Can I ride up front?” Aden asks quietly and shyly. He was still awed by the vehicles.  

“Of course,” Clarke answers without hesitation. She opens the door. “Hey, Aden’s going to ride beside you. That cool?” 

“Of course. Hey, kid.” 

“Hi.” Aden clambers up.  

“I was doing some training with O last time. That can’t happen anymore. But you’re a tough kid, maybe when you guys come back you could do sparring with me?”  

Clarke smiles when she sees Aden relax and smile at Miller with an eager nod. She knew he would be just fine riding shotgun with her friend. She climbs in back seeing everyone was in and shuts the door behind her. She sees Lexa sitting beside Madi and she takes a seat on the child’s other side.  

“Everyone ready?” Aden calls back, likely prompted by Miller.  

“All set!” Clarke says after everyone nods.  

The rover lurches to life and the drive begins.  

**** 

“Woah...” Madi runs ahead of them with Aden on her heels as she looks above her, taking in Becca’s Island. “This is so cool!” 

“Yeah,” Aden agrees quietly. He had never seen anything like this before. “This was really Bekka Praimheda’s?”  

“It was,” Abby says, placing her bag on a table.  

Everyone filed in. Clarke and Lexa were quick to move to the kids. Lexa was looking around in nearly as much awe as the children. Clarke knew the place well and she shudders slightly at some of the memories. Raven immediately heads for where the rocket was. Anya walks over to her family, the guard in her strong with them all in the unfamiliar place. Her instinct isn’t to shield the Commander; she places one hand on Aden’s shoulder and the other on Madi’s. Lexa would never mind—she would always want her children protected above herself. But she didn’t fear the place. Bellamy wandered in the direction Raven went with Echo at his side, Ontari trailing after them. Octavia made a beeline to Clarke, Lincoln following with an amused look. Kane and Octavia didn’t reunite on the boat. Octavia had hidden somewhere and wasn’t seen by anyone. From Lincoln’s amusement Clarke figured she had squished herself inside of a cupboard or something. The teen was far from cowardly or anxious but with pregnancy came the need to protect the unborn baby and so far, that translated into hiding from anything, or anyone, that she worried could cause harm. Kane walked over to Abby, surveying the area. Clarke remembered Kane never actually came to the island—he had been in Polis while her mother had come to the island.  

“This is it,” Raven’s voice says as she reappears. The glint in her eye tells them that she had reunited with the rocket. Tomorrow all the fuel we could ever need will be delivered. So explore, rest, relax. Tomorrow we begin. Tomorrow, we save the human race.” 

“Come on,” Clarke takes Lexa’s hand. “I know of a pretty awesome house with nice hot water and really comfortable beds. It's like a five minute walk. Pretty sure Lincoln and Octavia will want to come too but it’s a big house.”  

Lexa looks over at the kids.  

“Go,” Clarke turns and looks at Echo. “I for one do want to look around. Bellamy and I can keep an eye on Aden and Madi.”  

“You can stay. Four of us walking five minutes will be fine without a guard,” Lincoln tells Anya who hesitates. Lexa gives her a nod and Anya begrudgingly agrees. 

“We got the kids,” Echo tells Anya with a knowing smirk. “Go find Raven.” 

Both Clarke and Lexa chuckle as they walk away with Lincon and Octavia for some much needed pre Praimfaya time. 

Notes:

Next chapter will feature mostly fluffiness with Clexa and Linctavia, and some Ranya and babysitters Becho

Chapter 42: Rest and Plans

Notes:

This took longer to write than I planned. My birthday was Friday, I wanted to see my horses on my birthday. My horse Ruby (who I've had for 7 years) was great. Rode her, did photos. I brought my other horse Sassy (had for 1.5 years) over for group photos. Ruby decides that *jealousy activated* and in a temper tantrum kicked my hand. Ruby loves Sassy, they're best friends. Live outside together in a herd 24/7. That day Ruby did in fact NOT love Sassy. My hand paid the price. She broke it. So I am now trying to write one handed. It is not fun guys lmao I got weeks off of work and I can't even easily write.
Horses are fun, they said. Get more than one horse, they said.
They lied.
I'll still keep them around though. Ruby's grounded though. No extra snacks for her.

"I’m totally good with just curling up until tomorrow,” Octavia admits as the four enter Becca’s mansion.   

“Why?” Clarke prompts playfully. “Didn’t get enough rest hiding on the ride here?”  

Octavia makes a face at her. Then it softens. “Testing starts tomorrow.” She sighs again. Clarke and Lexa look at her expectantly but patiently. “I’m pregnant. Though I figure by now you’ve heard from someone .”   

Lexa is who nods. “We were waiting until you were ready to tell us.”  

“I’m about three or so months along, I think. I was definitely pregnant when we were in the Moutain,” she sighs regretfully.   

“You didn’t know,” Clarke tries to sound reassuring.  

“I figured it out not long after. Like... days after.”  

“Are you alright? Oktevia?” Lincoln asks, brows furrowed in concern. His lover had been sitting there, staring blankly at the tent wall.   

She looks at him finally and he can’t read the look in her green eyes. “I almost died.”  

“I know,” he sighs. “We’ve talked about this, ai hodnes.”  

“It wasn’t just me .”  

“Octavia?”  

“Diyoza was already six months along when I met her. But there were similarities. I almost missed it but I can feel...I feel repulsed by the food but it’s not because of the Dark Year. It's something else. Sickness but not sick.”  

“Sickness...Octavia, what’s going on?”   

“I think...I don’t want you to be angry.”  

“I won’t be.”  

“You don’t know that.”  

“Octavia.”  

“Lincoln...I’m pregnant. At least, I think I am. Pretty sure I am.”  

He had an unreadable look, and she blinked up at him. But then his face breaks out into a huge smile, and she feels a little lighter. He hugs her and he’s the gentlest she’s ever felt him be. She smiles a little at that. Shes still terrified , but a little bit of hope blossoms.   

“That is the best news, my love. I couldn’t be angry about that. We're going to have a child . I'll be a father!”  

“Best news? Praimfaya.”  

“We’ll figure it out. It'll be just fine.”  

“You really think so?”   

“I know so.” His smile grows. “I’m going to be a father! You'll be a mother. You're so good with Madi. And you said you raised Hope. You'll be great.”  

“You’ll be great.”  

“I knew I wanted a family, even as a kid. You are all I ever wanted, and this baby is the greatest bonus we could have.”  

Octavia smiles at the memory. She relaxes at the reassuring smiles from Clarke and the Commander.   

“You’re going to be on babysitting duty, you know,” she blurts out.  

“Of course. We owe you for all the times you’ve watched Madi and Aden,” Clarke agrees instantly.   

“And a baby will be so refreshing to have around,” Lexa agrees carefully. Friendship was still a tentative thing for her. “If anyone can make sure you and your baby will be just fine, it’s Abby.” Last time Lexa may have argued just a little, but her faith in the Skaikru and their tech had grown substantially.  

“That makes me feel a bit better,” Octavia admits. She covers a yawn. “I really do want to find those super comfy beds Murphy kept talking about. I won’t be surprised if he shows up with the shipment tomorrow.”  

“Neither would I,” Clarke chuckles.   

****   

“You’re going to space? In that?” Anya eyes the rocket.   

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” Raven says, trying to sound assuring. “This time will be much smoother. We have fuel from the dropship, and from Arkadia and other ships. I don’t think we’ll have the same problem with the delivery as before either. Abby and I go up, spend some time sequencing DNA to create Nightblood and voila. Before we go up, we are going to take bone marrow to test it. Ontari already volunteered. And someone will play guinea pig with the sequenced DNA blood to see if that holds up. The hope is that the sequenced DNA works as well as the real stuff and we can create enough of it in time. We will harvest as much marrow that is safe from Lexa, Luna and Ontari. Here’s the good part though. Say the sequenced DNA doesn’t work-"  

“ That’s the good part?” Anya scowls.   

“It’s how you look at it. The light if the bad thing happens. So say it doesn’t work, or say we can’t make enough of it. We won’t bleed our Nightbloods dry or take from the children. Once the marrow joins, we can use the created Nightbloods. So,11 say we inject myself, Clarke, Echo, you, whoever with the marrow before we go up—and at least a few people will be because of my example. The ones injected then, if need be, we can take marrow from them while the true Nightbloods recover.”   

“So even if everyone needs bone marrow, Lexa, and all the other Nightbloods, will be safe?”  

“Exactly. The goal of binding the DNA will hopefully make it so we don’t need to, but if we have to it won’t kill anyone. I hope we don’t need to because that’d be a lot of drilling.”  

Anya shudders at that.   

“Want to look inside? Promise I won’t start it.” She’s climbing inside the rocket before Anya can even answer. She smiles when she hears her following.   

“This is insane,” Anya mutters, looking inside the pristine machine.   

“Echo and Emori felt similar when we flew in it. Grounders in space. Hell, even Bellamy, Murphy, Monty and Harper were in awe.”  

“Can’t imagine why.”  

Raven sits in the piloting seat. Anya eyes her with mild distrust but sits beside her anyways. “I would never fly in one of these.”  

“A lot of people say that. Last time the choice was fly or die, so,” she shrugs with a smirk.   

“You’re not a warrior, but you’re braver than most.” Her tone is as genuine as Raven's ever heard it and she smiles.   

“You going to be worried when we go up in space?”  

“No.” She’s fighting a smile so she knows she’s not serious.   

“Liar.”  

“I do not lie.”  

“ Everyone lies.”   

Anya scoffs but doesn’t argue.   

“Do you have any weapons on you?”   

“Why?”  

“I want to make sure you won’t stab me.”  

Anya rolls her eyes. “If I was going to stab you, I would have done it a long time ago.”  

“Don’t stab me anyways,” Raven repeats.  

Anya stares at her in confusion. Then realization came.   

She didn’t even try to stop Raven from kissing her. She even maybe kissed her back.   

****  

“This place is so cool!”  

“Madi, don’t run too far ahead!” Bellamy calls. The little girl listens and stops at the end of the hall. She bounces in place, waiting for the other three to catch up.  

“Are you tired? Hungry?” Echo asks once they do. “You’ve got to be either one by now.”  

“Nope!”  

“ I’m hungry,” Aden says, less shy this time than the last. Echo hands him a sandwich from the bag and he smiles his thanks. Echo smiles in relief when Madi hops over for her own sandwich. Echo offers Bellamy a sandwich, and they all munch on their lunch as they continue the exploration.   

“He’s coming out of his shell a lot more,” Bellamy observes as the two children walk ahead.   

“I’m glad he is. He gets to just be a kid now.” He threads his fingers through hers. He knew that topic touched her deep. He felt it too in a way. He grew up watching his sister suffer. She wasn’t raised under harsh ways or to one day fight or die like Echo had, like Aden had been, but she raised as a girl who didn’t exist . He wasn’t sure what was worse.   

“Madi too,” he agrees. “She didn’t have it as bad, but she didn’t get to be a normal kid. Though I guess her six years with just her and Clarke were happy.”  

“Now that she has all these people in her life I think she’d say it was lonely, too, even if she didn’t realize it. It was lonely on the ring and there were seven of us.”  

“That’s also true. So…after Praimfaya?”  

“Bellamy.”   

“What?”  

“Why don’t you spend a good amount of time watching your sisters baby when it’s born before you start asking for anything.”  

“I raised a baby before.”  

“You were seven .”   

“Still counts.”  

“To an extent. But your mother also raised her. You have a baby there isn’t anyone but the parents to raise it. Wait until Octavia is a mother and ask her to compare the differences between helping raise Hope and having her own baby. And speaking of children, we're missing two.”  

“Damn it.”  

Echo chuckles as Bellamy jogs ahead of her. He stops at the end of the hall and she sees him deflate with relief. They didn’t actually lose them… yet .   

****   

“Think the kids are okay?”  

“Klark.”  

“Sorry. Instinct.”   

Clarke had introduced Lexa to the very hot showers with the great water pressure. Lexa had definitely said that after Praimfaya was over one of the first things needed was the showers recreated. Clarke definitely agreed. Their clothes were strewn on the floor and they were lying on the most comfortable bed Lexa had ever laid on covered by the softest blanket. It beat the fur blankets adorning the beds in Polis, and way better than what they had in TonDC.  

“I could lay here forever,” Clarke mumbles against Lexa’s neck.  

“Without the kids?” Lexa asks cheekily.  

Clarke lifts her head with a faux scowl. “The kids can stay here too, I guess.”  

“We should have them come take a good shower before we leave at least once. Aden will love it.”  

“Madi’ll flood the place with the tub.”  

Lexa laughs at that. “Probably. At least it won’t exist soon.”  

“True. That's fine I guess, then,” Clarke laughs. “Let them do whatever the hell they want— safely —until Praimfaya. They'll be cooped up for a while in not too long.”  

“I wouldn’t word it quite like that.”  

“Okay fine. Not quite like that.”  

“But anyways—kids are fine . It's not always we get half a mansion to ourselves while someone else watches the kids. We should enjoy the peace while it lasts.”  

“Okay, okay,” Clarke agrees. She presses her lips to Lexa’s in a searing kiss, relaxing into the peaceful quiet that surrounds them. There was less than a year until the world ended but their story was just beginning.  

Chapter 43: This Feeling

Notes:

I have no clue how long it'd take to make nightblood in space so I'm just guessing here. If anyone actually knows please let me know and I'll edit it lol

“How long will you be up there?” Clarke asks her mother. They were preparing for their brief visit to space to make the nightblood.   

“Not long. Raven has studied on that computer; she knows exactly what to do. As do I. We have more than enough fuel. We shouldn’t be up there more than a few days. Maybe not even that. We need to get it to bind, and enough. If we can bind enough, we won’t even need to use bone marrow. Lexa and Ontari are here just in case , not because we’ll need their marrow for sure.”  

“We’re going to beat it this time,” Raven says, all but jogging around the corner with her voice full of confidence. “I don’t think we’ll need a drop of marrow. I bet after all this, we’ll head back to TonDC and all that happened was we went to space, and you and your girl had a couple getaway with several babysitters at your disposal.”  

Clarke grimaces at the “ your girl” remark. Not only was it cheesy, but Lexa felt like it was so much more than her girl .   

Raven grimaced too. “Yeah. I know. Never let Lexa hear me say that.”  

“Let me hear you say what?” Clarke chuckles when she hears Lexa’s voice. The Commander turned the corner, Aden glued to her side with wide eyes. He was still in awe every time he walked around the lab. “Where’s Mads?”  

“With Echo and Bellamy.” Clarke wasn’t surprised. Madi spent a lot of time with the former spy. Between Echo and Bellamy, Lincoln and Octavia, Madi never felt lonely when she and Lexa had something they had to do. “Hear you say what?” she repeats.   

“Skaikru language,” was all Raven had to say.   

“More like don’t let Anya hear you. Skaikru language really bugs her sometimes,” Clarke laughs.   

“Most of the time,” Lexa says quietly.  

“All the time!” Aden offers with a laugh.   

“See, I love this!” Raven laughs. “Everyone’s cool with just making fun of each other.”  

“You all say things so strangely,” is all Lexa says about it.   

Abby smiles softly. “You’ll get used to it. Even I struggle to understand what they’re saying. Though I’m apparently too old to keep up. You will do just fine keeping up...eventually.”  

“You’re not too old , Mom,” Clarke tells her. “Just old enough to be a grandmother!”   

The rest of them laugh as Clarke dodges Abby’s swat.   

****   

“Do you ever wish you could go back up to space?” Madi asks, fingers working at the brain challenge toy in her hand that Raven had given her. She and Echo were sitting in one of the bedrooms in the house. Bellamy had gone downstairs to make some food, leaving the two together.  

“No,” Echo’s answer comes quickly. “Not unless Bellamy had to go back up. Then I’d go back willingly. And only then.”   

“What if he had to but you couldn’t? Or you had to, and he couldn’t?”  

Echo pauses, lips pursed as she considers Madi’s sudden question. She'd argue that wouldn’t be a scenario, but she knew it very well could be one. Clarke got left behind despite the fact she was supposed to go. She went at the last minute. They all did. It was supposed to be her crashing Murphy and Emori’s lighthouse bunker trip, the others getting Raven and going back to the bunker. But instead, they all, minus Clarke, went to space. “I don’t know,” she says quietly to Madi.  

“I kind of wish I could go and visit space,” she mulls. “Like a visit up to the ring. I liked those stories.”  

“It wasn’t as much fun as the stories may have seemed.” If it hadn’t been the place she fell in love with Bellamy, she would have wished it all away. She would have wished Azgeda away too, so she reckons the ring wasn’t that bad. But for six long years she yearned for blue sky, rain, snow, sunshine, fresh air and real ground beneath her feet.  

“Tell me about it?”  

“As you know, it was dark and cold. The sky was just a long dark abyss,” she had learned that word from Raven one day when she was staring into the dark nothingness outside the window. “The sun was this big orb, it looked nothing like it does from earth. The moon didn’t, either. The air was recycled and never smelt fresh or clean and it was cold, hard steel under our feet. There was no true sunlight, no day or night, no rain or breeze or warmth. We used clocks to tell time. It was just always dark out. The showers were only hot for three minutes, the fourth minute it was warm, by five minutes it was icy cold. We had to take turns cleaning the latrines, which was not a fun job. Eating algae was bad, though I'd tell Monty it was getting better. He worked so hard to improve it. Our drinking—and bathing—water was recycled urine. There weren’t many places to go. I wanted to disappear a lot at first, I was the outsider. A hated outsider.”  

“Briefly,” Bellamy’s voice sounds from the doorway. Echo smiles when he walks into the room with a tray. He offers both of them a bowl of soup.  

“Thank you,” Echo says and Madi mimics her.  

“I followed you around a lot. Might have been a little annoying but I wanted you to fit in. I knew you were an important part of our survival.” What he doesn’t say aloud for Madi’s ears is, I followed you everywhere because you wandered the halls like a ghost. You had that haunted look in your eyes that worried me. I was scared you might try to kill yourself again.  

“A little annoying?” Echo chuckles and he smirks. “Emori became your friend early on. She didn’t know you but you were both Grounders in space so you had some sort of understanding. And Raven realized you’re strong pretty quickly and roped you into work and training. Once that happened Harper was all in.”  

“Monty was pretty wary at first.”  

“He worries about Harper a lot.”  

“And Murphy definitely didn’t like me but he didn’t really like anyone, so I wasn’t too bothered it took him the longest to warm up to me.”  

“I knew him a year and he still didn’t always like me.”  

“He’s your best friend now.” Best friend . Another Skaikru line she had adopted with ease.  

“Who’s yours?” MAdi asks cheekily, knowing her answer.  

“Octavia.” She could have easily said Emori or Raven, but Octavia was who would get a reaction out of Bellamy. It's what Madi was fishing for. She giggles at his expression.  

“I love that you and my sister get along great now. I just don’t love that your favorite pastime together is to torment me .”  

“It’s what she wants to do,” Echo says innocently with a shrug.  

He scoffs but can’t fight the smile. “It’s what you like to do, too. You don’t do anything you don’t want to, not anymore.” His words have no bite and he wraps an arm around her. He kisses her cheek lovingly.  

“You really love each other,” Madi speaks up with a smile. She saw Lexa and Clarke, Octavia and Lincoln, Echo and Bellamy, and all she ever saw between them was unconditional love. It warmed her heart every time.  

“We do, don’t we?” he asks, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear.  

“When are you having a baby?” Madi asks curiously. Echo freezes and Madi frowns. “Is that not what grownups who love each other do? My moms have me and Aden, Octavia’s having a baby.”  

“It is what grownups do,” Echo says carefully, “but not right now. Not with Praimfaya soon. Octavia wasn’t trying to have a baby before Praimfaya. It just happened.”  

“But one day?”  

“One day.”  

“How does it happen? How are babies made?”  

“That is an excellent question to ask your mom,” Echo says with an edge of panic in her voice.  

“Which one?”  

“Either one,” Bellamy at the same time Echo says, “Clarke.”  

“Cause Lexa will panic?” Madi guesses.  

“There’s a good chance of that happening.”  

“You’re right,” Madi shrugs. “Clarke’s good at not panicking at my questions by now.”  

“Clarke’s good at not panicking at most things by now,” Echo says with some awe and respect in her voice.  

“That she is.”  

Chapter 44: An Olive Branch

Notes:

First half includes a sad attempt at smut

But hey! I'm back! They say they come in threes...I changed jobs, which is great but a lot more hours. Life was going pretty good. My idiot self even bought a new horse. Then BAM 7 car pileup on the highway. I walked away with minor injuries thankfully, and spent a week resting but since my glasses broke I couldn't even write on my downtime lol but I was stuck sitting in a waiting room today because my little brother got stung by a bee on his face (like HOW did he manage that?) at the barn and had a reaction (thankfully not serious and he's okay) and while sitting, with new glasses, I produced this. Not the greatest chapter but it's a chapter. The smut half I wrote weeks ago and just never finished the chapter. Hoping to be back on a semi-regular basis at least, and not a once every other month basis. We shall see!

Anyone who likes medical stuff/sciency stuff know how the heck to make the baby a Nightblood? Cause if not I'm winging it and basing it on what little knowledge I have from Grey's Anatomy lol

“You get to see your mom today.”  

Clarke smiles. “I do. I can’t wait. It hasn’t been that long, but I've really missed her.”  

Lexa smiles softly, sitting beside her. “Once they come down, the whole world will change. In a much better way, this time.”   

“We’ll all be Natblidas.”  

“You volunteered to be the first to test it?”  

“I did . Then Bellamy decided to swoop in or whatever to be the actual first. Saying something like if it doesn’t work, which saying that pissed Raven off,” they both chuckled, “that I'm needed to help my mom with making sure Octavia and the baby will be safe.”  

“He’s not wrong. You're valuable in so many ways, Klark. As a leader, a doctor and a warrior.” Clarke scoffed at that. “You may not be the best in hand-to-hand combat, yet, but you’re valuable among using Skaikru guns. Don't count yourself out.”  

“You think too highly of me.”  

“I don’t think I do. I do get updates from Anya. She says you’re a quick learner and you have skill. Trust me, she knows. She trained me .”  

“Confident, aren’t we?”   

Lexa smirks. “Just a little.”  

“I think it’s more than just a little ,” Clarke laughs lightly. Lexa loves the sound. She doesn’t respond, she merely captures Clarke’s lips in her own.   

Clarke backs Lexa to the bed. Legs hitting the mattress made Lexa fall into a sitting position. It was a sense of déjà vu, without any danger on the horizon. Clarke leans down, kissing her lover passionately. It had been a while, or at least it felt like it. The children were all the way at the lab with Echo, and they were alone in the mansion.   

She works at removing her lover’s top. No random snaps, no buckles, no armor, just a simple shirt. She loved seeing her lover living happily, simply. They deserved it. Lexa is just as eager to remove Clarke’s clothes. It was a blur of clothes being removed and tossed haphazardly.   

Clarke sucked at her neck, feeling her pulse under her hot breath. She didn’t even care if she left a mark and she heard no complaint coming from Lexa’s lips. Lexa’s hands roamed eagerly.   

Clarke lets out a startled gasp when she suddenly finds herself laying on her back instead of hovering. She raises her eyebrows at Lexa. “Really?”  

“You always get to be in charge. My turn,” Lexa says to her in a soft, gentle voice.   

That was Lexa—outside she was the Commander in charge of the human race. In the room, she was softer, and often happy to let Clarke take charge.   

She kissed her neck, savoring the sounds she heard from her lover. She sucked on her pulse and kissed down her clavicle, her chest. Clarke moaned when Lexa’s mouth found her breast, her hand finding her other breast. She played with her breast with one hand, kissing and sucking the other. When she was satisfied, she switched, giving her other breast attention with her mouth.   

When she was done, she kissed her way slowly down her stomach, each kiss fueled by love and passion. And kissed her hips as she settled between her legs. She kissed the inside of her thighs, taking her time. They had all the time in the world at this moment, and she was going to use it. One thing she had learned in her time on earth, both of her times, was that tomorrow wasn’t promised. She had learned to treat every time like it was her last time, because for all she knew it could be. She kissed her warm center, eliciting sounds from Clarke that she’d keep in her memory. She heard a gasp followed by a moan when she ran her tongue through her folds. She was going to make sure everything in this moment was imprinted in their minds.  

****   

“So…how do we even do this?” Octavia asks. “How do we even ensure that our baby becomes a Natblida too?”   

“I’ve been doing research, and there’s a procedure I’ll probably  have to do. Becca had the procedure in her findings but I’ve found nothing on if it works or any real steps. This is going to be trial and error.”  

“So…our baby is going to be a science experiment?”   

She feels Lincoln’s strong hands on her shoulders though it doesn’t do much to help her anxious nerves. Not much scared Octavia. She didn’t shy from fights, from war, from death. She fought the people controlled by ALIE, fought and won the conclave, survived for years in the bunker, faced the Primes and the Children of Gabriel and Cadogan's army. But this? This terrified her in a way she never thought she’d be.   

“I’m not thinking of it like that way. I’m thinking of you as a patient, a patient I know, and I care about. And the baby as a patient, a person who just needs some experimenting with to give him or her the best care possible. That is how I’m looking at this situation.”   

“Okay,” she breathes.   

“It’s a scary situation, I understand. I’ll keep you as informed as I can as we plan this. But we’ll be testing the nightblood before we do anything to you or the baby.”  

“Testing it on my brother . Always the damn hero.”  

“He’s thinking of the children. Your baby, Madi and Aden.”  

“Yeah, he jumped in the second Clarke started to volunteer. He can’t risk it and leave Madi without her.”  

“He’s trying to make up for past sins.”  

“Why can’t he realize he’s already been forgiven?”  

“Maybe he needs to learn how to forgive himself.”   

Octavia spun around when she heard the last voice she wanted to hear. She knew she could only avoid Kane for so long.   

Looking at him cause anger to rise up in her.   

Him refusing to eat which caused Abby to push her. Which put the wheels of her becoming Blodreina in motion. No, she didn’t solely blame him or Abby for Blodreina. She blamed them for letting her do it alone and refusing to take any responsibility. She hated him for joining McCreary and killing countless people in the gorge. For slaughtering others to save his ass.   

She also felt crippling guilt. Forcing him to eat—taking away his choice. Letting what others did turn her into the person so many feared. For putting him in the fighting pits, not once, but twice. For punishing him for taking the fall for Abby. For the argument post cryo that resulted in his eventual death.   

“Do you forgive yourself for all the deaths in the gorge that only happened because of you?”   

“Do you forgive yourself for them being in the gorge in the first place?”   

She swallowed hard. Lincoln puts his hands on her shoulders and gives Kane a look of warning. “No, that’s fair,” she admits. “That’s not me. Blodreina was a monster created by a lot of people. You included. Am I responsible for what I did? Yeah I am. But I don’t carry the full blame for her existence.”  

“That’s…fair. We all made mistakes. I guess that’s why we’re here now. To fix our mistakes. To make humanity better for the future.”   

“So not going to Bardo .”  

“What about Sanctum?” Abby asks, thinking of her last moments in the last life.  

“The Primes may have memory too. But I think Sanctum will be a Clarke and Bellamy decision. They lived there with the Primes. I never really spent time with them. I was with Diyoza and Gabriel the whole time.”  

“Diyoza?” Abby and Kane both ask.  

“The same Diyoza from Eligius ship?”  

“Mmhmm. That's a long story. For later. Right now, I really need to eat.”  

“I was just stopping by to see if Abby wanted to take a lunch break with me. We could all go eat together?” He offers. It's an olive branch.  

She nods, and she takes it.  

Chapter 45: To Be Loved

Notes:

This took a little extra time to write, but it's also a little extra longer than usual. Hope you enjoy!

“Are you ready?”   

Bellamy simply nods, holding his arm out to Abby. He feels Echo's grip on his other hand tighten. He sees Octavia, Clarke and Raven watching with baited breaths. This wasn’t the scary part, not really. It was what came next.   

Abby inserted the needle into his arm and injected it. Black veins formed up his arm. Clarke remembered watching it weave up her own arm last time.   

“How do you feel?” Echo asks, voice laced with concern.   

“I’m okay,” he nods, looking at his sister who had paled.   

“We'll test it tonight,” Abby says. “Make sure that the nightblood has enough time to be effective in your body.”   

She leaves then, heading back to the lab. She still had much to do, and a lot of prep for Octavia’s procedure that would happen if the Nightblood proved effective. When, she reminds herself. She didn’t think the group’s hope and future would remain intact if Bellamy’s nightblood test did not end well.  

“Come on. Let’s go get something to eat,” Bellamy says to the others. None of them had eaten yet. They had all come straight to the lab first thing this morning.  

“I’m not that hungry,” Octavia mumbles.   

“ You need to eat,” Clarke says, forcing a smile. Her stomach was doing flip flops, the harsh reality that things that could go wrong did was still ever present in her mind.  

“Everything will be fine,” Raven assures them. “Things are better this time.”  

“She’s right,” Bellamy agrees.   

“I know that look, Clarke,” Raven says, “everything going wrong has happened to us. It was our reality. But we fought like hell, and we’ve been given a second chance. We have worked hard, so hard, and things have been working in our favor this time. The Hundred landed and there were no losses. I landed safely, radio intact. The Ark was able to land safely. We have peace with all the clans—or we’re at least safe from them because of Lexa. We got the Mountain with minimal losses. We defeated Nia and shut down ALIE. We alerted everyone about Praimfaya without serious chaos. We’re working on shutting down the closer reactors before they, well, react.”  

“Wait, what?”   

Raven shakes her head. “Our loved ones are alive. Bellamy is going to ace that test. We'll all get Nightblood. The procedure for Octavia’s baby will be successful. We’ll ride out the death wave, we’ll have hopefully lessened the blow and Monty’s algae crap will help plants regrow outside of Eden. And we’ll be hopefully ready when McCreary inevitably comes down. I’m not sure how ready we’ll be if we see the Primes, but we have so much time until then. We'll all be fine.”  

“Love the confidence,” Bellamy says, “but can we circle back to the shutting down reactors?”  

“I’ve been radioing Monty and Sinclair. We think we might be able to shut them down before they melt down. The radiation isn’t the greatest around them, though.”  

“But if you’re Nightbloods with the suits...”  

“We have a serious chance of actually succeeding.”   

“I think after the test, we all deserve a victory dinner,” Bellamy tells them.  

“Or a last meal,” Octavia says with a rue smile.  

“O.” Bellamy sighs and wraps an arm around his sister’s shoulders with the arm Echo wasn't attached to.   

The group headed back to the house where the rest of their family was waiting for them. They had a long couple of days ahead of them.  

****   

Abby had drawn everyone’s blood who was in the lab, except for Ontari, Aden and Madi. She had drawn some of Lexa’s, who volunteered, much to Clarke’s dismay, only to compare hers with the nightblood they had created in space. She was making sure the Nightblood would be compatible for everyone. She wasn’t risking losing a single person. She wasn’t trying to do anything but that, but she was tired and ran the extra blood against each other.   

It wasn’t like any of them other than the Blake siblings were related, anyways.   

She was wrong.   

“What did you need to show me?” Kane asks tiredly, rubbing his hand on his face.   

“I needed a break from the Nightblood so I ran tests on the blood I took.”  

“Is someone sick?” He’s more alert now, worry showing on his face.  

“No.” She pulls up the screen. A screen showing paternity.    

“Abby, what is this?”  

“A paternity test.”  

“I see that, but what—" he looks at the other name on the test. His child. “Have you told—"  

“No. I needed to show you first. Whether you want it told or not, is up to you.”  

He runs his hand through his hair, processing what he just learned. This was the last thing he expected to learn. And he didn’t know what to do with the information.  

****   

Everyone was gathered in the lab this time.   

Bellamy was near the pod where he would soon climb into as he was battered with wave after wave of radiation. Echo was right by him, anxiety rolling off her in waves. Her fists clenched tightly, and she felt the burn in her eyes. Octavia was on his other side, Lincoln’s arms around her. He was ready to pull her from the room if need be. Raven stood nearby, Anya beside her, a hand on the unusually quiet mechanic’s shoulder. Clarke was near them, Lexa beside her. The Commander’s fingers were threaded through Clarke’s comfortingly. Aden and Madi were towards the back of the room with Ontari. They didn’t fully trust the Azgeda teenager yet, but they allowed her to hang out in the back with them in case things went wrong and they had to be ushered out. Kane hung in the back as well in case he needed to aid the children. Abby surveyed the look on his face from across the room. He was watching the group with an unreadable look. Abby wished he would have said something before the radiation test, but she knew he wouldn’t. Couldn’t .   

“Are you ready?”  

Bellamy nods, not trusting his voice. He pulls Echo over and kisses her deeply, and the former spy didn’t care about the audience they had. He presses a kiss to his sister’s forehead, holding her close for a moment before Lincoln guided her away. Bellamy climbs into the pod and Raven approaches. She takes Echo’s hand and coaxes her friend back from the pod.  

“Everything will be okay,” the mechanic quietly assures her friend. “He’ll be fine. And then we all will.”  

“I need you to be right,” Echo murmured, watching as the clear cover of the pod shut. It whirrs to life and Abby begins pressing buttons. Echo inches forward instinctively.   

Bellamy sees her and presses his palm against the glass and Echo frees her hand from Raven’s. She moves over to the pod and presses her hand against it over his. She was willing him to be okay with everything in her. Wiling him to survive, and thrive, to pave way for the rest of them, for the entire human race.  

“Increasing the radiation,” Abby informs. Echo flinches and she sees Octavia do the same from the corner of her eye. She knows Octavia wants to be here with her brother, pressing her own palm against the glass. She also knows why Lincoln won’t let her. If it goes wrong, Lincoln doesn’t want her to see it. Echo knows Raven wants to keep her back away from the pod, too, but she’s not strong enough. Raven was wishing for Roan to be here this time again so someone could pull Echo back if need be.  

“Increasing radiation to Praimfaya levels.”  

This was where it went wrong before. Where the man they tested started convulsing and ultimately died. Clarke reminds herself that he only died because he was on a medicinal that thinned his blood and the radiation test made him bleed out.   

With baited breaths they watched and waited.  

“How are you feeling, Bellamy?” Abby asks.  

“Good,” he answers breathily. “A little claustrophobic in here and maybe tingly. But I feel fine. When can I get out?”  

“When the radiation clears. It shouldn’t be too long.” Abby turns the machine off and turns the filter on.   

Octavia rushes up beside Echo, pressing her palm to the glass. “Hey, Big Brother.”  

Bellamy presses his hand on the other side of hers. “Hey, O. You good?”  

She nods. She knows she’s pale and shaky but she’s truly okay now that he’s survived. “I’m good. Now. Don’t do anything scary like this again though.”  

“I agree with her,” Echo chuckles, placing a hand on her shoulder.  

“Of course, you do,” he laughs, a genuine laugh.  

****  

“Get some sleep, O. Your procedure is tomorrow.”  

Octavia nods, wrapping her arms tightly around her brother’s waist. “I’m scared.”  

“I’ll be right there. Lincoln will too.”  

“I’ll be asleep.”  

“We’ll still be there.” He strokes her hair. “You may be asleep for it, but you won’t be alone. And when you wake up, you’ll have us and the knowledge that your baby is safe.”  

“If the procedure goes well—"  

“When.”  

She chuckles lightly and nods. “ When the procedure is successful, it gives you no excuse not to make sure my baby has a friends close in age.”  

“Octavia!” He shakes his head at her when she lets him go to give him a tired smirk. “That’s more up to Echo, anyway. I highly doubt she’ll agree with you, anyway.”  

Octavia simply shrugs before ducking into her room. He shakes his head and heads to the room he and Echo shared in the mansion.  

He hears the shower going and he heads for the bathroom, shedding his clothes. He steps into the shower and her eyes meet his. He kisses her under the stream of hot water. The very hot water. Usually, he’d made a complaint about how a woman from the Ice Nation shouldn’t bathe in water that was equal to standing in flames and she’d roll her eyes at him. He wasn’t in the mood for that today. He places his hand on her face, stroking her cheek. He takes a moment, memorizing everything. How her long, wavy brown hair was darker under the water. Her caramel brown eyes and how much love they carried even though she wasn’t loved most of her life. The shape of her face, her lips, every little detail. He captures her lips in his own then, kissing her deeply, lovingly. He almost died today, and all he wants in this moment is to love her and be loved. He kisses her cheek, her neck, her shoulder. Every kiss was deliberate, purposeful, loving.  

“Ai hod yu in.” Her voice is soft and shaky, and it fills his heart with joy. Usually, he initiated the “I love you.” Usually, he was lucky to get a solid response back. She loved him more than anything and he knew it, but voicing her emotions was never her strong suit.  

“Ai hod yu in,” he tells her, just as softly. He kisses her lips softly. “Forever.”  

****  

Kane walked up the stairs, slowly as he wondered if he was doing the right thing. He didn’t spend much time in the mansion, he mostly slept in the room in the lab with Abby. Asking any of the sky kids would get around before he could even reach out himself, so he had to resort to asking Lexa what room he had to go to, and then explain himself best he could to the confused and slightly concerned Commander. She had reluctantly told him, and he was half convinced that she had Anya watching him from somewhere he couldn’t see.  

He wasn't sure if he was trying to convince himself into or out of knocking. He drew a deep breath. Once he knocked, there was no going back. There was so much history there, good and bad. Once he said what he came to say, there was no going back.  

How did he do this? Just blurt out, “I’m apparently your father. No, I didn’t know. I just found out late last night.”  

That wasn’t him . He, the man he aspired to be, encouraged everyone to try better. He gave speeches about hope. He encouraged honesty and being just. He could give a speech about a better tomorrow to the whole clan, but he struggled to find the words to say to his kid.  

He knocks.  

And the door opens.  

Notes:

Next chapter:
Kane & the conversation
Clarke and Lexa get some scenes again, sorry for the lack of them this chapter!
Octavia's procedure!

Chapter 46: Family Now

Notes:

Here it is, updates close together! And this one ended up over 3k words, which is double the usual length. Apologies if the last part is rushed or doesn;t make much sense. The first 2/3 was written with care, the last 1/3 was written on the ride to work, lunch break, and at the end of my night after a looong week of being a teacher pf 20 four year olds lmao, I'm exhausted and running on no sleep but my half asleep brain really wanted to finish this chapter over sleep so here it is!

He, the man he aspired to be, encouraged everyone to try better. He gave speeches about hope. He encouraged honesty and being just. He could give a speech about a better tomorrow to the whole clan, but he struggled to find the words to say to his kid.    

He knocks.    

And the door opens.    

He half expected Lincoln to open the door, but he was relieved when it was Octavia who was.  

“Kane?” she’s rubbing her eyes tiredly. He feels some remorse for coming so late. She has a long day tomorrow with the procedure, but that is why he had to come. He couldn’t spring it on her tomorrow morning right before her procedure, but he couldn’t wait.  Maybe it was selfish. Maybe his confession would leave her sleepless tonight.   

“Can I talk to you?”   

She looks over her shoulder at Lincoln. “Does it have to be tonight?”  

This was his out. He could easily nod and wait and pray. But he nodded his head. “It won’t be too long. We can go for a short walk to the kitchen and get a glass of water before you go to bed.”  

“Um…okay...” She looks doubtful and reluctant but agrees. “I’ll just let Lincoln know. I’ll be right back out.”  

He’s very surprised she agreed to come with him at all, let alone at this hour. He half expected her to shut the door in his face or to mumble an excuse or send Lincoln to shoo him away. When she comes back out a minute later, he notices how tired she looks. He's surprised Lincoln let her leave, but also not surprised that he did with her independence and stubbornness  

“I knew your mother,” he blurts as they make their way to the kitchen.   

“You had a part in floating her, did you not?”   

Ouch . “Not like—not from that. I knew her.”  

“ You knew a lowly woman from Factory Station?” She sounds almost amused. “I thought the privileged didn’t mingle with the worker bees?” She seemed too tired to process the fact that he was the last person she wanted to have a conversation with. Or maybe she was just more forgiving than he thought.   

“It wasn’t a public affair.” She hears a hint of remorse in his voice. She swallows and then frowns in confusion. He seems to be piecing things together as he talks, and she’s confused—was he friends with her mother? More than that? “I saw her behind closed doors, when Bellamy was gone. I had arranged her care for him even though she couldn’t afford to put him in care.”   

“So, it was before I was born, then?”  

They reach the kitchen, and he grabs two glasses and fills them with filtered water. He hands her a glass. “I cared for Aurora, very much so. We had, um, we were talking about introducing me to Bellamy. Being seen in the public eye. But then, one day she cut me off. No explanation. It hurt, but eventually I moved on. Since I was high up on the council and she was a seamstress in Factory, our paths didn’t pass anymore.”  

She sips her water, having questions at the tip of her tongue but didn’t want to interrupt his talking. She would take anything about her mother she could learn. Bellamy didn’t like talking about her, and most of what he knew of her so did she. He didn’t have a lot of memories of her back when he was so little. He was so young when she was born. Too young to have been responsible for a secret baby.  

“I didn’t think much of it even when she was arrested and floated sixteen years later for having a second child. She must have just found out she was pregnant with you when she ended things with me. She didn’t want me to know—"  

“Wait.” He stops, letting her process. She stares at him, emotions flashing in her green eyes. “What are you saying, Kane?”    

“Abby did the nightblood simulations. She had extra blood and ran some tests on it. Maybe she was bored, maybe she was curious. I'm not sure why.”  

“And ours matched?” It was oddly comforting and easy for him, that she was filling in the blanks without him having to force the words out.   

“They did.”  

“And you were with my mother up until her pregnancy? Like...having sex and all that?” He grimaces but nods, letting her process. “You didn’t know at all?”  

“Not until Abby told me last night.”  

“So...”  

“Octavia?” He can’t read her expression.   

“So, you’re my father?”   

“I am.”  

“Do you hate that?”   

“Why would I—"  

“You hate me, hated . After the Dark Year, the gorge, after.”  

“Octavia, I don’t hate you. I don’t think I ever hated you. It was easy to blame you, easier than hating Abby or myself. It's taken a long time to realize that. Too long. I needed to tell you before tomorrow.”   

“In case I die? Or something—something happens to the baby, and I just wish I was dead?”  

He puts his hands on her shoulders. “Hey. Look at me.” She refuses and he tilts her chin up. “Octavia. You are not going to die. You will be fine. The baby will be fine. You will both be fine. Things are different now.”  

She nods, drawing a steady breath. “I hope you’re right. We fought hard for a better life.” She gave a cheeky smirk; one he hadn’t seen since she was a child in the old life. Before Lincoln’s death. “So... you found out you’re a father and a grandfather the same day?”  

He laughs, his first real laugh in what felt like ages. “I guess I did.” He sighs. This moment was nice. In this moment, it was almost as if the animosity from the past had dissipated. He knew there was a very real chance that tomorrow, after everything sunk in, that she’d turn around and be back to shutting dors and avoiding him. He wanted to bask into this moment, but it’s late and she has a long day the next day. “Should get you back to your room before Lincoln comes looking for you.”  

She chuckles sleepily and knows it’s a very real possibility. He rinses out both cups and sets them to dry. He holds out a hand to help her out of her seat and she takes it, letting him help her up. They're quiet on the walk back. It's not a far walk and they’re both processing. They stop at the door and he’s not sure what to say.   

“Goodnight,” she breaks the silence, though her voice is not much above a whisper.   

“Goodnight,” he echoes.   

She hesitates before stepping towards him. He's shocked when she wraps her arms around her waist. The action shocks her, too. She writes it off as she’s exhausted and hormonal and emotional about the day to come. But she doesn’t let go and lets him hold her tight. He held her like he did after the relief at Mount Weather, like after she was nearly killed in the act that won Indra over, when he survived the collapsed building from the missile. He hugged her like he did after Lincoln’s death, after ALIE, after the conclave. He hugged her like those early days in the bunker when she was trying to find her way, when he was her support system once upon a time. Like he did before the Dark Year.   

It's familiar. And it feels, deep in both of their souls, like a piece neither knew was missing finds its place where it belongs. It's comforting, and it almost feels like home .  

****   

“I almost don’t want to leave,” Clarke says softly, wrapped up in the warmth of the blanket and Lexa’s arms. It was her most comforting place—laying in a comfortable bed, in her lovers arms, skin on skin. Another beauty of the spacious mansion was that Aden and Madi had the room next to them. Back at TonDC, the four shared a tent , leaving Clarke and Lexa to find moments between meetings and the kids playing and sparring.   

“It’s nice,” Lexa agrees. “This is the life we dreamed of before”  

“Maybe someday, you and I will owe nothing more to our people,” Clarke says, quoting her past self. “Maybe after Praimfaya, once we get then through this all, and everyone’s a nightblood, we can find our someday.”  

Lexa smiles softly despite that it likely wouldn’t become reality. “We can take our children and make a peaceful home.”  

“If they can stop some reactors, maybe there’ll be places other than the valley.”  

“Maybe here,” Lexa says softly. “Maybe we won’t have to leave here for good.”  

“That would be perfect. Maybe someday will be sooner than we think.”  

“I hope so.” Lexa rests her head against Clarke’s. “I love you,” she says. It comes out so easily now, and she feels the love deep in her soul.   

“I love you,” Clarke gets out before kissing her hungrily. Lexa let her climb on top of her. She was the Commander out in the public eye, but when it was just the two lovers, Clarke was often the one in charge. Clarke kisses her deeply then moves down. She kisses her neck, right over her pulse. Lexa's heart is racing and Clarke smiles as she kisses her. She kisses down her clavicle and her mouth finds her breast. She kneads at her other breast, making Lexa's head fall back with a moan. Her hands ran up her back smoothly, gripping her to ground herself. After Clarke is satisfied with the attention she’s given her breasts, she kisses her way down her lover’s toned abdomen. She feels her shiver under her warm breath. Even now, even after being alive again for quite some time with her love, she still always fell apart when they were in the safety and privacy of closed doors—or tent flaps.   

“You’re so tense ,” Clarke mumbles against her hip.   

“Stress,” is Lexa’s breathless excuse.   

Clarke settles down between her lover’s legs with no fear of interruption. She had wanted to savor the moment. She always wanted to savor every single moment with the love of her life. She feels Lexa shudder under her as she feels her hot breath against her center and she dives in, tongue gliding through her wet folds. Lexa’s head jerks back against the furs, a jolt of electricity running through her. She presses her palm against her mouth to muffle the moans that escaped. There were actual walls here, but their children slept on the other side of it. She almost doesn’t care. But she doesn’t want to answer any questions, especially from the ever-curious Madi.  

She isn’t thinking coherently for long, breathless curses in both her native tongue and English slipping past her tongue, muffled by her palm. She knows Clarke hears them and is savoring th way she makes her feel. She can barely mask herself when Clarke adds her fingers, overwhelming her in the best way possible.   

“Kl-Klark,” she sputters her name out, followed by a babble of Trigedasleng. “I--I’m almost th-there.” It isn’t long before she comes fully undone, finding her release.  

Clarke climbs back up, lying beside her. Lexa rolls over, head on Clarke’s bare chest as her breathing evens out. She strokes Clarke’s arm absentmindedly as she comes down from. “You should get a tattoo.”   

“I-- what?” Clarke chuckles breathlessly, kissing the top of her head. “That’s where your mind went?”  

“Hmm. I don’t mean—something like others. I mean—a bonding one.”  

Clarke sits up, startling Lexa and forcing her to sit up as well. “Bonding is marriage.”  

“It...is.”  

“You want to?”  

Lexa nods instantly. Confidently. “I know I'm the one who’s had... cold feet as Skaikru puts it. I don’t want to waste a single moment with you, Clarke. I want a life worth living . And I’m not afraid of everyone knowing that you are mine. That we are a family—you and I, Aden and Madi.”  

“When do you want to?” Clarke asks carefully, keeping her excitement at bay. She wanted to jump up and down like an excited child and scream loud enough for everyone to hear.   

“After we distribute the Nightblood. Before Praimfaya. In that in between time where we can all relax for a short while.”  

“And you want a—a public bonding ceremony?”  

“In Polis.” Clarke nods. Polis . Where their love story truly began, just before it suddenly ended. “We could do TonDC if you want,” she adds quickly.   

“No. Polis...it’s beautiful. It ended there, our story. This time, in the same place, we continue it. Do the tattoos hurt?”  

Lexa laughs. “I’ve felt a lot worse. So have you.”  

“So that’s a yes.”  

“Yeah, it’s a yes.” But she just laughs, and Clarke loves the sound of it.   

****   

That morning, it was busy. Very busy. Not for everyone, just a select few. Abby and Clarke had prepped the testing lab. Abby hadn’t wanted Clarke doing everything medical on her friend, but Clarke insisted she be there as a second set of hands. She'd be damned if Octavia or the baby died when she could have prevented it.   

Lincoln had walked Octavia down. Abby didn’t bother telling him, or Bellamy, to leave. They'd fight and stay no matter what.   

“You’re shaking,” Clarke says softly, rubbing her hands up and down Octavia’s arms.   

“I’m a little bit terrified here,” the younger girl manages to say.   

She looks at Lincoln with wide green eyes and he’s over by her in a flash. He wraps his strong arms around her small frame. “You’re okay, my love,” he whispers in her hair. Bellamy moves closer, placing a hand on her back. She needed as much comfort as she could get.   

“It’s time,” Abby says. “I’ll talk you through it one more time, okay?” Octavia nods mutely. She sniffs, fighting the urge to cry from the overwhelming feeling she was having. “I’m going to give you an IV with fluids and add an injection that will put you to sleep. Not deep asleep, just lightly. I'll give you some oxygen, just in case. I'll make a small incision, and I'll insert the shunt and probe into your stomach, through the uterus guided by ultrasound. The nightblood serum will be injected directly into the umbilical cord. We will keep you asleep and under close monitor of you and the baby for a few hours to make sure there’s no adverse effects. When all is clear, we’ll wake you up. You'll need to be monitored for twenty-four hours for any effects, but it should all go well.”  

“We’ll be there the whole time, O,” Bellamy promises, and she nods.   

When she’s laid down with Abby prepping her arm is when the tears come. She’s shaking, shivering, tears running from the corner of her eyes into her hairline. Lincoln is stroking her hair back, and Bellamy has a firm grip on her hand. She lets out a hiss when Abby inserts the IV into her arm, her vulnerable state causing her to be more sensitive to pain than usual.   

“You’re okay,” Lincoln soothes, stroking tears off her cheek.   

The door opens and Bellamy looks over his shoulder to see who was intruding. He feels a strong feeling of annoyance when he sees its Kane. “What do you want?” His tone is harsh. He thinks that the last person Octavia wants to see is the man she’s been avoiding at all costs.   

“I just wanted to check on her before her procedure,” he says almost doubtfully.  

“You should leave.”  

“Bell,” Octavia mumbles. “S’okay.”   

He looks at Abby, sees her drawing the needle from the IV. She's starting to feel drowsy, and he chalks it up to that, until she continues.   

“He can stay. Be nice.”  

“Why should he stay?” he demands. He looks at Lincoln, wondering why he’s not bewildered at this.  

“Cause...he’s my dad.”  

“He’s what?” He looks at Lincoln, then Abby and Clarke, then Kane. The only one who appeared as confused as him was Clarke. “O?”  

“She’s not going to be answering anything else,” Abby says, eyes on the screen showing her vitals. She covers her nose and mouth with an oxygen mask, just to be safe. “If there’s going to be any issues, everyone must leave. She's out just enough, there’s a good chance she’ll be able to hear any fighting even if subconsciously. We need her to fight and be okay, if she gets distressed, the baby will too.”  

“No fighting,” Bellamy promises, turning his attention back to his sleeping sister.   

“Get comfortable.”   

Kane brings over a chair to Lincoln so he can stay by her head, stroking it and whispering sweet nothings into her ears. He brings a chair to Bellamy, who keeps a hold of her hand. He brings a chair to her other side and sits.   

“Hold this,” Abby directs, and Clarke holds the ultrasound wand to her friend’s growing stomach. At four and a half months along, her pregnancy was clearly visible now. There was no hiding it anymore.   

Abby made an incision on her abdomen and readies her tools. Bellamy grimaces—they look scarier than he expected. He notes that Lincoln looks like he feels the same. Lincoln was more concerned; he was much less familiar with Skaikru technology than Bellamy. The tool is inserted into her abdomen, and he flinches. She was asleep but it looked like it hurt . “There we go.” Abby murmurs. She picks up the syringe with a long needle that a small amount of nightblood.   

“Are you injecting the nightblood into the umbilical cord?” Kane asks quietly, remembering Abby’s many nights of rambling.  

“I am,” she murmurs, inserting the needle in slowly and steadily.    

Bellamy looks at Kane, looking for a distraction from the fact that a very large needle was inside of his sister. “What do you mean by you’re her father? You didn’t even know our mother.”  

“I did. I was…I was in a relationship with Aurora, you were young, and I saw her when you were in care. That's how your mother was able to put you in care. I had pull.”  

Abby glances up from her patient. “She’s who we teased you about? We knew you were seeing someone. Thelonious, Jake and I would bother you endlessly about your secret lover. Even after you came home one day with a broken heart, you refused to tell us who the mystery woman was.”  

“It was her. She broke things out so suddenly. It must have been after she discovered she was pregnant.”  

“If you found out, she would have been forced to terminate my sister’s life.”  

He shakes his head. “No. I had pull—"  

“No pull allows a second child.”  

“She wouldn’t have been. I would have fought. She would have been my first child. I would have taken her. She wouldn't have had a brother if that happened and having you as her brother is why she is who she is today. I think everything worked out the way it was meant to.”  

“When did you find out?”  

“Two nights ago. I told her last night.”  

Bellamy looks at Lincoln and he nods. Kane knows Octavia would have filled him in on everything. “How was she? After I talked?”  

“Tired. Confused. Overwhelmed.” It’s all Lincoln offers. His eyes stayed glued on his sleeping beauty and Kane knows he won’t get anything else out of him barring an emergency.  

Abby lets out a whoosh breath. They all look at her to see she’s extracted the needle, and the shunt. She gets the materials she needs to stitch.  

“Is that it?” Bellamy asks, startled.  

“It is. Now, we just have to monitor her and the baby closely for the next few days. I'll keep her under a few hours—if any reaction happens it will be easier to work on if she’s already out and not panicking. After a few hours if she’s doing well, we’ll wake her. She'll need to stay here for the day. We'll discuss whether to keep her here at the lab or to let you bring her back to the house when we get to that point.”  

Lincoln nods and whispers his thanks before pressing a kiss to Octavia's forehead. Bellamy nods as well as Abby begins stitching her up.  

“You can come over if you want,” Bellamy offers begrudgingly. It's a small olive branch and he gratefully takes it.  

After all, they were family now.  

Chapter 47: Ultrasound

“Hi, my love.” 

Octavia blinked, winching at how bright it was in the room. Her sleepy eyes sought out the voice groggily, and she sees Lincoln seated beside her. He was brushing her hair back and stroking her cheek lovingly. “H-hi,” she whispers. She feels someone squeezing her hand on the opposite side and her head lolls to the side to see Bellamy. “Nobody looks sc-scared,” she murmurs, her voice slurring a bit. “Nothing wrong?” 

“Everything went just how it should,” Lincoln reassures her. “You were just fine, and you woke up easy. And our baby is doing great. Abby said his or her vitals are strong, and the serum worked.” 

“Abby said that depending on how you and baby are doing tonight is whether she’ll keep you here for monitoring or let us bring you to the house,” Bellamy adds. 

“I don’t want to stay here,” she whines sluggishly. Lincoln bites back a smile. He thinks that’s one of the most adorable things he’s heard. Moments of her having a dropped guard and just expressing herself were few and far between—and right now all she could do was express emotions. “Lincoln can monitor me. He always monitors me anyways. All of me. Very well.” 

“O!” Bellamy chastises with a laugh. Lincoln ducks his head in embarrassment, but they hear a snicker come from him anyways. They hear a throat clear uncomfortably behind them and Bellamy smirks, knowing the awkwardness Kane was feeling in the moment and couldn’t find a part of him that felt bad.  

Just then, Abby walked into the room, Clarke on her heels. “I see our patient is awake,” Abby comments with a fond smile. “Did she wake up okay?” 

“Woke up trying to scar me, per usual,” Bellamy shrugs.  

“As your little sister, that’s her job,” the doctor laughs. “What particular scarring did she do this time?” 

“She likes to remind me how she got pregnant in the first place.” 

“Blame it on the drugs this time,” Clarke tells him with a laugh, amused. 

“This time.” Bellamy snorts. “How out of it is she? She seems too okay to blame the drugs.” He gives Octavia a side eye. 

“I can hear you, big brother,” Octavia mumbles. 

Abby pulls up a chair and sits. “Okay, humor me. What’s your name?” 

Octavia rolls her eyes but answers, nonetheless. “Octavia Blake.” 

“Where are we?” 

“Becca’s Lab, on an island.” Her answer is slow and a little slurred, but it’s correct and confident.  

“Why are we here?” 

“All of us? Or me in this par… particular moment?”  

“Let’s say both,” Abby chuckles. 

“Nightblood sol…solution. I am here cause the baby got nightblood. Now ev-everyone here has nightblood.” 

Abby looks at Bellamy. “Scratch that. Can't fully blame it on the drugs. She’s not that out of it. Her inhibitions are just lowered so she can speak freely without the fear of consequence.” There was laughter throughout the whole room, including Octavia. Abby's face turned serious, but a welcoming serious. “While we are here, with Becca’s beautiful, advanced technology, and since you’re feeling alright, I thought that you’d like to see your baby on the ultrasound.” 

Octavia adjusted herself, a bit more alert at the sound of that. “Different than the ultrasound from Mount Weather?” 

“ Much better. I might just take it back with us to one of the bunkers.” 

“You should .” Clarke was who answered. Abby smiles at her daughter's eagerness.  

“ How much better?” Octavia asks. The one at Arkadia had shown a blurry but an actual image of her then teeny tiny baby. The whooshing of its little heart had filled the small medical room. Could it be better than an imagine and the sound? 

“ This ultrasound is much clearer. You’ll be able to make out the baby itself more than just seeing a blob. And he or she is bigger now. And the heartbeat will sound clearer.” 

Octavia nods quickly and jerkily. “And you can make sure it's healthy, right? That nothing is wrong?” 

Abby nods as she turns on the machine. “The vitals have been great. If there’s anything physically wrong then yes, I could likely see it. But I highly doubt anything is wrong. Everything about the baby seems too healthy for that.” She folds up her shirt. Octavia's eyes flit to the stitched-up incision on her stomach. “See, just a small cut. It should heal up nicely. It might get itchy so make sure you don’t scratch at it.”  

“I’ll make sure she doesn’t,” Lincoln assures Abby with a smile.  

“Thank you.” She’s genuinely thankful. Sometimes talking to strong willed Octavia was in one ear and out the other. She wouldn’t always listen to authority figures, especially those she had trust or respect issues with, but she would almost always listen and respond to Lincoln.  

“Going to be cold?” Octavia asks as she sees the gel.  

“Going to be cold,” Abby nods in agreement.  

"Bell didn’t see last time,” Octavia says as Abby puts the gel on her stomach.  

“This is going to be really cool,” Clarke tells Bellamy. She looks at Kane, “yours, too.”  

Octavia glances at Kane. Her eyes flit to Bellamy, then to the older man. She could easily guess that the reason Kane was standing so far away was because of her big brother’s protectiveness. “You can come closer, if you’d like. Lincoln won’t let Bellamy bite.”  

“I don’t bite,” Bellamy says, amused. He looks at Kane, still unsure how he felt. But he wasn’t going to kick him out if his sister and Lincoln were alright with his presence. With the recent stress, Octavia being willing to accept him in her half-asleep state would not come as a shock. But if Lincoln deemed him safe to be near her, he figured he could be, too. “You can come over,” he adds for good measure.  

Kane shuffles over, staying on the other side of the bed than Bellamy. He was beside Clarke, who was also more or less a daughter to him now. She gave him a friendly smile.  

The screen lit up the doctor’s face when she turned it on, and she moved the wand around the girl’s stomach. The whooshing sound of the baby’s heartbeat filled the room loud and clear. “There it is, healthy and strong.” Abby gives the couple a smile and turns the screen so they can see.  

“It actually looks like a baby ,” Octavia blurts out. “Not a blob.” Everyone laughed at that.  

“The baby grows quite fast in this stage of utero; they do quickly turn from blob looking to human looking in mere weeks,” she tells her with a chuckle. “At this stage, babies do move around more so if you start feeling any aching don’t be too worried. Your baby is also getting its senses, which means it’ll be able to hear your voices. At this stage, gender of the baby can be determined if the ultrasound gets a good angle.” 

“Is it? A good angle, I mean?” Octavia asks slowly. 

“A very good angle, actually.” 

“So, you know if it’s a boy or girl?” Lincoln asks her. It was incredibly quiet in the room, as everyone waited for Abby’s answer.  

“I do.” 

“Are you going to tell us?” Octavia asks again with an impatient tone that made the doctor chuckle. 

“Lincoln, do you want to know?”  

He nods, “yes.”  

“You have a beautiful, healthy little girl.”  

**** 

The spacecraft was circling the planet. Unlike before, where it was a vast desolation of brown except for Eden, it was mostly green, with minor desolation.  

The coordinates were set for North America. More specifically, northwestern Virginia.  

Boots thudded down the corridor, past the rows of frosted cryosleep chambers. He hovered over one pod specifically, staring at the face behind the glass, fingers hovering over the keypad. Two choices. Two leaders amongst the prisoners. He didn’t know which one was better. Paxton McCreary. Charmaine Diyoza. Which was the lesser of the two evils?  

“Please let this be the right choice.”  

He pressed the bottom. And with a hiss, the pod opened. 

Chapter 48: Home Sweet Home

"I already miss the island,” Madi complains as the rover makes its way back to TonDC.  

“Me, too. I liked the shower things,” Aden agreed. “After Praimfaya, they should be built. Raven can build showers.”  

“I can?” Raven asks, eyebrows raising. Anya snorts beside her. “I think you’re overestimating the nature of my abilities. I can build things that are tech , not showers. Mechanic . Not plumber.”  

“You won’t know ‘til you try, won’t you?” Madi challenges. Like her adoptive brother, she also loved the hot, steamy stalls.  

“Yeah, Raven,” Clarke laughs, turning around in the front seat to look at her friend, “you won’t know until you try!”  

Raven looks over at Lexa, raising an eyebrow. “You willingly signed up to deal with this ?”  

Anya elbowed Raven hard and the mechanic winces. She might have a budding something with the mechanic, but she was speaking to their Commander . But Lexa just smiled, unaffected. She had accepted how obnoxiously outspoken Skaikru could be, boldly speaking their minds. And she has accepted that Raven was one of Clarke’s best friends, her family, and getting along with her was in everyone’s best interest. She also accepted how blunt the Mechanic was. It wasn’t hard—it was getting easier and easier for the mechanic to make her smile or fight back a laugh. “You’re special, Raven. They don’t do that to me.”  

Raven chokes on her words before laughing hard. “You’re right. I am special.”  

“Now she’s really full of herself,” Anya complains to her former mentee, but Lexa can tell it has no bite. The loud, exuberant Mechanic had been slowly softening up the war chief. Anya would smile here and there, occasionally joke and would slip and use Skaikru words if she didn’t catch herself first. She had managed to keep it together for the most part, even through the Nightblood injections.  

Becca's Island, 3 weeks ago  

“Finally!” Raven exclaimed when Abby presented the nightblood doses, making the doctor chuckle.  

Anya looked at the mechanic, unsure why she was so excited to be a Nightblood. She was Skaikru . She didn’t grow up with black blood as a rarity, something royal and special. Or, to some people, an almost guaranteed death sentence.  

Echo saw the expression on the village chief’s face. “Not the way you think. She's excited because she’s not the odd one out this time.”  

“This time?”  

“Last time Clarke was a nightblood, Murphy and Emori became nightbloods. Then you joined that group,” Raven looks at Echo.  

Echo shrugged with a downcast face. “I wasn’t a willing participant of it.”  

“But what I'm saying is that Bellamy and I, we were the only ones who weren’t part of it willingly or unwillingly. Which wasn’t a big deal, until Emori was dying, and I was the red blooded one who wasn’t able to help save her.”  

It still bothered her, learning Emori died . Thankfully because her mind was preserved in Murphy’s head, the higher beings let her transcend. When Murphy and Emori told them all about their last few hours, especially to Clarke because of what happened with Josephine, Raven had found herself holding Emori close, clutching her like the higher beings might change their mind and take her away.  

“We’re all here, now,” Abby assured her. She stroked Raven’s cheek. She had a lot of pain, guilt and regret heavy on her young shoulders. Raven held guilt and pain heavily from Abby’s death. “Are you ready now?” Raven nods quickly.  

She holds out her arm and Abby holds it gently. Raven sees Anya move to watch closer from the corner of her eye. She sucks in a breath when the needle was inserted into the crook of her arm. “Cool,” she murmurs as the black veins weaved up her arm like a web.  

“Let me know if you feel any affects,” Abby tells her, putting the syringe back in the case before producing another one. She glances at the door just as Bellamy walked through it. “Right on time.”  

Bellamy walked over to Echo and sat beside her. “I asked Abby to do Raven first so I would be able to make it here for you.” Echo smiles at him and he kisses her temple.  

“Just a pinch,” Abby assures her, holding her arm. “A big pinch but it will be over quickly.”  

Echo nods, swallowing. She remembered last time a little too well. Bellamy threads his fingers through hers on her other hand. She squeezes his hand when Abby inserts the needle, inserting the black serum into her veins. The black tendrils formed up her arm and she stared at them. She didn’t see that happen last time, she had been bound.  

“Does it hurt?” Bellamy whispers in her ear.  

“Just a little,” she answers. Once the needle was out, it was just a dull ache. He wrapped his arm around her, hugging her closely.  

Abby moved over to Anya next with a new vial. She wasn’t sure how the war chief would react and approached her apprehensively. Anya just held out her arm to her. She trusted Lexa, and she’s witnessed quite a few of the injections by now. When Abby grasps her arm is when she speaks. “Do you realize what this will cause? I understand this is how we survive, but it has the ability to cause unsettling in the clans. It could cause uprisings. Nia is dead, that’s true. But that doesn’t mean there isn’t any Azgeda who is still for her cause. That there isn’t anyone in other clans who want Lexa’s downfall but didn’t have the ability or cause to act before. We may not have seen the last of war before Praimfaya comes. We could face a war, or maybe even assassins sent for her head. With everyone being a Nightblood, anyone can take the flame. That means Lexa’s life could be in danger. Aden, the other novitiates. Madi, too. All the true Natblidas, the ones born with the blood.”  

“That is why we’ll have to come up with extra security measures once we’re back home. Keeping Lexa and the kids safe will be of the utmost importance other than Praimfaya preparation. I promise you.”  

Anya studies the doctor and gives a short nod. “You may do the... injection now.” The term sounded foreign in her mouth.  

The corner of her mouth twitched when the needle penetrated her skin, but she didn’t let the pain of the sharp pinch show. It wasn't so much the pain itself—she had felt much worse. It was the type of pain. Just like in the mountain a lifetime ago. The needle shoved in her arm to make the world spin and go dark so they could hand her upside down and drain her blood. She was not in the cage for very long, but it stuck with her despite her ability to hide it. The black veins told her that she was turning into a Natblida. And with that, a lifetime of beliefs was coming to an end, opening the doors for a new era.  

Present Day   

“I think... everyone’s a little special. In their own way, for their own reasons.” Madi says, looking at Raven’s lingering smirk.  

“I agree with that, kid,” Raven agrees.  

Clarke turns around in her seat again to peer at Madi. “Who are you most excited to see once we’re home?”  

Madi looks thoughtful. Aden speaks up, “the other Natblidas. I used to spend all my time with them. But I like having a family now.” He smiles at Clarke, and she smiles back in return.  

“Gaia,” Madi finally says. “I love my Seda. What about you? Who are you most excited to see?”  

“Honestly? Probably Murphy.” Madi laughs at that. “Like Aden said, I spent a lot of time with Murphy. And with Emori, Monty and Harper.”  

“I miss Harper,” Madi says with a nod. “She watched me almost as much as Octavia and Echo when you had meetings.”  

Aden nods. “She’s really nice and kind. Monty, too.”  

“Murphy?” Madi giggles.  

Aden shook his head, “no. I like him I guess, but he’s not nice. He’s not mean, but he’s... different . Emori is different too but she’s a tough kind of nice. And kind.”  

“That’s why she was believable portraying Kaylee Prime. It wasn’t just an act,” Raven adds, smiling. “That’s my girl.”  

“Apparently Raven and Murphy liked to fight over Emori,” Clarke explains to the others.  

“She spends a lot of time in the workshop,” Anya says. Raven glances at her. She could hear what almost sounded like jealousy in the warrior’s voice.  

Raven nods. “She’s a quick learner. On the ring after Praimfaya, she was a quick study and I taught her everything I could. How to run things, how to use the rocket simulator, how to build and fix things. She's my best friend. She is absolutely without a doubt in love with Murphy. Definitely was a surprise for some of us. They just work so well. Next pregnancy I'm betting will be them.”  

“I bet it will be Bellamy and Echo,” Madi voices, “Bellamy keeps bringing it up.”  

“He what?!” Clarke and Raven exclaim loudly, making both Anya and even Lexa jump slightly.  

“You’d be surprised what people will say in front of kids. They never think I pay attention. I always pay attention.”  

Before Clarke could respond, Miller announces, “here we are. Home sweet home.” Clarke looks forward to see that they were rolling through the gate of TonDC. Home sweet home.  

****  

“Clarke!”  

Clarke exited the tent, following the sound of Harper calling her. The other blonde doesn’t give any explanation, she just grabs Clarke’s hand and pulls her to Raven’s communication tent.  

“What’s going—"  

“Shh!” Raben hushes her.  

Clarke hears it, garbled sound coming from the radio. “I could hear it better with the radio tower at Arkadia,” she whispers. She's fiddling with the radio. “Unless I can get it clearer here.”  

Clarke looks around. It's just their close-knit group. Raven, Bellamy, Octavia, Echo, Murphy, Emori, and Harper. She wonders why Lincoln and Jasper aren’t present, but she figures it’s the same reason why she didn’t drag Lexa with her. She does wonder why Monty isn’t here but doesn’t have to wonder long. He walks into the tent, putting tools down.  

“Try now,” he says.  

Harper looks at her friends who were on the island. “While you were figuring out the Nightblood solution on the island for the last six weeks, we built a radio tower. Well, Miller and I carried things and did the lifting while Monty and Sinclair put it together.”  

“Life savers. All of you,” Raven says with a smile. She turns the knob again and the radio came to life.  

“Calling the ground, looking for safe landing,” a woman’s monotone voice sounded over the radio, sounding bored.  

Murphy grabbed the radio before anyone could stop him. “Who the hell is this?”  

There's a pause, likely from surprise. “Eligius. Looking for safe landing.”  

"They're early. Years early," Monty says with concern. There's a mixture of concern, annoyance and even fear on their faces. On everyone's faces besides Octavia's, who had a mix of concern and hope on her face. 

“That voice sounds familiar,” Clarke says. “But I can’t place it.”  

“I can,” Raven says. “Remember my frenemy, Nikki?”  

“Hello? Are you still there?”  

Clarke reaches out a hand to still Murphy from responding. “Guys. One important thing. Whose side was she on before Sanctum?”  

“You mean, which side is awake on that ship right now?” Raven asks, swallowing.  

“Does that matter?” Murphy asks, hearing Nikki’s voice on the radio again trying to reach them.  

“It matters because someone woke her up.” Clarke points out.  

“McCreary,” Emori answers. “She and Hatch were McCreary’s.”  

“So... can we take a guess on who’s awake on that ship up there?”  

“Well, fuck.”  

Chapter 49: The Radio

Notes:

Not that long, not that great. But it's been a while and wanted to give you all something.

“Guys. One important thing. Whose side was she on before Sanctum?”    

“You mean, which side is awake on that ship right now?” Raven asks, swallowing.    

“Does that matter?” Murphy asks, hearing Nikki’s voice on the radio again trying to reach them.    

“It matters because someone woke her up.” Clarke points out.    

“McCreary,” Emori answers. “She and Hatch were McCreary’s.”    

“So... can we take a guess on who’s awake on that ship up there?”    

“Well, fuck.”    

Octavia yanks the radio out of Murphy’s hand. “O, don’t!” Bellamy warns. “Not until we talk about what to do.”  

“We need to know who’s awake. They're coming down either way and we should know whether to welcome them or prepare for war.”  

“She’s right,” Clarke tells Bellamy with an exhausted sigh.   

“And they already know we’re here because someone already spoke.” Octavia states, eyeing Murphy. He just simply shrugs.   

“What are you going to say?” Bellamy asks in a resigned voice. Echo puts a hand on his arm and his shoulders lower a bit. He was not ready for a war, not with Praimfaya looming over them. Clarke glances at the younger Blake.   

“Who her leader is,” Octavia says simply, confidently. “Once we know what we’re facing, we’ll know what to do next.”  

“Easier said than done,” Murphy answers. “Maybe someone else should take that,” Murphy suggests, motioning to the radio that is in her hand with a vice grip, “one of them ,” he nods towards Clarke, Bellamy and Raven.   

“No way.” She moves the radio further from him.  

“And maybe her girlfriend should come so when this blows up in our faces, at least the Commander is in on it. We do not need two wars going on.”  

“Shut up, Murphy,” Harper tells him. Monty's lips twitch slightly.  

“ I’m doing this.” Octavia says. “Not Clarke, not my brother.”  

“You want to be a leader again? Revive Blodreina or reinvent her or whatever?” Emori swats his arm, raising her eyebrows at him.  

“No.”  

“Then why?” Emori asks, voice curious.  

“Diyoza,” Raven answers for her. “Well, go on.”  

Octavia was suddenly very aware of all the eyes that were on her. Bellamy and Clarke, with matching expressions of utter concern. Echo and Raven, with looks of encouragement. Murphy, with curiosity mixed with doubt. Emori, with complete curiosity. Harper’s reassuring look, Monty with a mix of concern and encouragement.  

“This is the ground,” Octavia speaks into the device, “who is this?”  

The radio is silent for a moment, then the voice is heard again. Her tone is mixed with relief yet cautiousness. “You’re there. Nikki. What's yours?”  

“That doesn’t matter. Who woke you?” Octavia’s voice is demanding and leaves no room for argument. Bellamy knew the harshness in his sister’s tone was the anxiety talking. She was bouncing on her heels a little, the hand not holding the radio was clenched in a fist.  

“Our pilot.”  

“Shaw?” She looks at Raven. The mechanic had a relationship with him before . Then he died, and they went back in time, and she had some sort of budding relationship with Anya. She wondered how her friend felt. Any emotions Raven was feeling she was keeping at bay.  

“Yes,” there’s a small hint of surprise in the criminal’s voice. “You knew him?” She knew there were very few people from the ground left by the time she met them in Sanctum.  

“ Of him. Just like I know of you, Nikki. So, tell me, who else is awake?”  

“You want to know which mass murderer will be coming down with an army?”  

Octavia's nostrils flare. Raven shakes her head and yanks the radio out of Octavia’s hand. “Please just tell us, Nikki.”  

There’s a pause. “Raven Reyes? Well, i think this would be what, fourth time we’d be saving your asses?”  

“I guess we owe you big time down here. But we can’t pay you back if we’re all dead .”  

“You have a point,” she sighs over the radio. “Hey! Be a doll and go get the boss. Our friends on the radio are dying to hear from them.”  

There's a collective eye roll on the ground. “We’re supposed to work with her on the ground?” Echo mutters.  

“Funny, I said the same thing about you before,” Octavia counters with a smile that Echo returns.  

“You still there, Raven Reyes and whoever was on before her?” Nikki’s voice sounds over the radio. “Because I got the conscious leader here.”  

“Who is it?”  

They all braced themselves. McCreary or Diyoza. The one who would try to destroy everything they were building. One who they could probably work with.  

“I think there’s probably more than just Raven and one other person,” the voice says over the radio. “I’d be willing to be a hell of a lot that there’s a whole group surrounding the radio right now.”  

Before Raven could respond, Octavia took the radio back, taking a few steps away from her friends. “Diyoza?”  

“Octavia.”  

Chapter 50: From the Sky

Notes:

This was kind of all over the place with not a lot of resolve, but hope you enjoy regardless.
If you haven't read the note the chapter before this, please check it out.

“Diyoza?”  

“Octavia.”  

The youngest Blake’s shoulders relaxed, and she seemed to deflate. She hears footsteps behind her, and she turns to see Bellamy. Echo's on his heels and she’s thankful it’s them . She scans the rest of them. Clarke still has a look of concern on her face, the leader in her still having its guard up despite the brief time she spent on Bardo with them. Raven's face mirrored her brother and Echo—relief. Murphy and Emori’s looks were unreadable, as in Harper, but Monty still looked concerned. He didn’t have any good memories of Diyoza, unlike the rest. She was the terrorist who fought with them over the valley, that was al he and Harper remembered.  

“Octavia, are you there?” Diyoza’s concerned voice came through the radio.  

“Wait, before you respond,” Murphy says, halting her, “maybe her girlfriend really should be here for this . She’s the leader of the human race, after all. Even though she’s our age,” he says, eyes on Clarke. Murphy thought it was ironic how much in the beginning Abby, Kane and Jaha had fought them on Clarke, and even Bellamy, being leaders at their young age when a kid like them ruled the entire human race . “If this does blow up in our faces, we really do need the Commander in on it, and whoever she sees fit. We seriously do not need more than one war on top of the impending door of Apocalypse Two.”  

“He’s right, Clarke,” Raven points out. “Lexa needs to be here before we radio back anything else. This will affect all the clans and possibly all of our plans.”  

Clarke nods, resigned. “I’ll go get her; you should really get Anya, she’s Chief of TonDC. Octavia, you should get Indra.”  

Octavia hesitated, not wanting to release her vice grip on the radio. She didn’t want to miss a single word that would come from Diyoza. She wanted nothing more than to assure her that she was still here. The older woman was a lifeline to her, especially in this very moment. She thought she’d have to wait years to see the woman she had grown to love as her family again.  

Echo was observing her, remembering her own time on Bardo with Octavia, Diyoza and Hope. Hope . The Hope they knew was gone forever. She would just be a child no older than Octavia’s baby, with no memory of the Anomaly, meeting her and Gabriel on Sanctum, the training on Bardo, transcendence after the Last War, the beach by the lake. That stung . She knew that knowledge had to have stung Octavia too—she had raised Hope. But getting Diyoza back could be enough to soothe the ache in the younger Blake’s chest.  

“I can go find Indra,” Echo offers. She and Octavia’s relationship had come a long way. She as a person had come a long way. She feels Bellamy squeeze her hand in gratitude and sees the small, relieved smile on Octavia’s lips.  

“Thank you,” Octavia says, shoulders relaxing. Echo released Bellamy’s hand, and the older Blake immediately moved to his sister, putting himself between her and the others who might try to stop her from reassuring Diyoza. Well, between his sister and Murphy. She figured Emori, Monty and Harper wouldn’t try to stop any attempts. She glances at Bellamy pulling Octavia into his arms as she ducked out of the tent. She thinks she just might stop to fill Lincoln in after she finds Indra.  

Further down the lines of tents, Clarke was walking into the large tent that belonged to her family. She pauses and smiles at the peaceful feeling that washed over her. Lexa sat on the bed, dressed in her plain sleeping clothes, face free of paint, her hair free of braids, curls falling over her shoulders. Madi was curled up on the bed, her head resting on Lexa’s lap as she slept. Lexa’s eyes were on the sleeping child, a content smile on her lips. She was combing her hair through Madi’s dark curls, the child’s hair also free of any braids. Clarke scans the room and sees Aden asleep in his bed. He was burrowed under the furs, the top of his blonde head the only thing visible. Clarke walked over to the bed and green eyes met hers.  

“Is something wrong, ai hodnes?” Lexa asks, concern written on her once peaceful face. Clarke hated that.  

She sits, careful not to jostle Madi. “We need you in the communication tent,” Clarke answers. She draws her legs up, sitting cross-legged. “Remember the story about the Eligius crew?”  

“The ship that came down when it was just you and Madi in Shallow Valley?”  

“That’s the one.”  

“You said they came down six years after Praimfaya. One leader was a tyrant and slaughtered what was left of the clans in a gorge, and he bombed the valley leaving Earth inhabitable. The other one had eventually turned into a hero in the end.” Clarke nods, staying quiet as Lexa works it out. Clarke can see the gears turning in her beautiful head. “They must have their memories, too...they were told stories of down on Earth?”  

“Diyoza was, at least.”  

“They’re awake?”  

“Some of them are.”  

“Your friends, they built their radio tower, didn’t they?” Clarke nods. “They’ve radioed?” Clarke nods again. “Which one is awake?”  

“Diyoza.”  

“That’s the one eventually became a ‘good guy?’”  

“She is. They know we’re here, but before any plans are made, we need you. Raven went to get Anya, and Octavia went to get Indra. It's up to you on who else is involved.”  

“Who else knows of this?”  

“Bellamy, Echo, Murphy, Emori, Monty and Harper.”  

“Nomon?” Madi’s sleepy voice interrupts them. She sits up, rubbing her eyes tiredly. “What’s happening?”  

“It’s okay, Madi,” Clarke assures her.  

“Diyoza is on the radio?”  

“How much did you hear?” Lexa asks her gently.  

“Some,” she shrugs with a yawn.  

“We should bring her with us, see if maybe Harper can watch her for us since she already knows what’s happening. We can’t leave her with someone else,” Clarke tells her. “We’ll ask Gustus to keep an ear out in case Aden wakes up.”  

Lexa nods in agreement. Clarke gets up and Lexa follows suit. She lifts Madi up, the child’s legs wrapping around her waist, arms wrapped securely around her neck, head resting sleepily on her shoulder. “You have her?” Clarke nods.  

Lexa nods, “she’ll be asleep before we reach the tent, I reckon.”  

The two left the tent, Lexa asking Gustus to watch over Aden. Before he could argue that he should be watching over her , Anya and Raven approached them. The four walked to the communication tent together.  

“We’re supposed to just trust these people?” Anya asks skeptically.  

“That’s more a question for Octavia and Echo. They knew Diyoza best,” Clarke admits.  

“Heda?” Anya raises and eyebrow at Lexa.  

“We listen to the woman on the radio, talk with Octavia and Echo, then we decide and plan. They may have resources we may need to survive Praimfaya,” Lexa says, rubbing an almost asleep Madi’s back.  

“The Eligius ship could be used for overflow people to go up and come back down when it’s safe,” Raven adds. “Also, last time Polis tower collapsed on top of the bunker, and they were trapped there for an extra year. Eligius used their technology to free them. We'll need that. We cannot move the tower and our people stationed in Polis say it’s been a struggle to find ways to ensure an exit point after the death wave.”  

Anya sighs. She doesn’t like it, but she would just have to trust Lexa, Clarke, Raven and the others to make the right choice.  

They enter the communication tent. Clarke sees Indra is there. She sees that Lincoln and Roan have joined.  

“Roan was with Indra when I went to get her,” Echo immediately explains when she sees Clarke’s curious look. Clarke doesn’t bring up the fact that she thought Octavia was finding her mentor.  

“Is everyone all aware of what’s happening?” Clarke asks, eyes flitting to the three newcomers.  

“Echo explained everything on the walk over here,” Indra says.  

“Octavia told me,” Lincoln told them.  

“What did you tell Diyoza?” Clarke asks the younger Blake. She knew that Octavia would not leave Diyoza sitting there, asking over and over if they were there like they had with Nikki.  

“I told her that we would talk soon, and that you were getting our leader. That's all.”  

Clarke nods and she holds a hand out for the radio. Octavia sighs but hands it over before going back to leaning against Lincoln.  

“Diyoza?”  

“Clarke. Hello. I assume this means your leader is with you now? Octavia didn’t tell me who it was. It isn’t Madi, is it? She's what, five or six now? And it’s clearly not you.”  

Clarke offers the radio to Lexa. The Commander readjusted the sleeping child and took the radio. Using the radio was still so foreign to her, but she was growing comfortable by the Sky People’s technology little by little.  

“Hello. My name is Lexa kom Trikru, and I am the Commander.”  

There's silence for a moment, and then, “holy crap, is there ever an adult in charge? You sound way too young to be a grown up.”  

Lexa looked at Clarke in alarm. “That’s just her being her,” Clarke assures her quickly. “In, um...the time before the first Praimfaya—that's where they’re from—kids were never in charge of anything. Under eighteen was considered a child, and adults had to go through extensive processes or something to become leaders. So, her seeing Octavia, me, and especially Madi in leadership roles bothered her. You being in charge also is a little bothersome. She'll respect you, Lexa. At least as much as Skaikru does.”  

Lexa smirked. “Why am I not surprised?” She sighs. “How many of you are awake?”  

“Thirty-eight.”  

“Ask her how many are still asleep,” Clarke prompts.  

“How many are asleep?”  

“Two hundred and sixty-two.”  

“Does she plan on waking them?” Raven asks. “Or leaving them in cryo?”  

“What will happen to those who are sleeping?” Lexa asks.  

“That depends on how this chat goes,” Diyoza answered honestly.  

Clarke reaches for the radio, which Lexa gladly handed over to her. “What the hell does that mean?”  

“Hello again, Clarke. If this goes well, then with the help of everyone’s knowledge we’ll decide who to wake and who doesn’t. If this doesn't go over well, then it’ll be a fun guessing game and everyone besides McCreary and his close associates will be awaken and I'd rather not risk a civil war up here, which would inevitably transfer to down there. So how about we figure this out so myself and my loyal comrades can come down and meet you all?”  

Clarke looks at Lexa. The Commander nodded. “Let’s begin.”  

Notes:

Coming up next chapter will be a Diyoza/Octavia reuinion, and scenes involving Linctavia, Clexa and Becho.

Chapter 51: Eligius

Notes:

Hey, I posted in a reasonable time since last update 😂 and thus chapter is almost triple the usual length! We got a little bit of Clexa, Linctavia, Becho, and we finally meet Diyoza.

“I can’t believe they’re coming down. I thought we had six and a half more years,” Octavia says, laying on her back on a pile of furs. Lincoln was sitting beside her, running his fingers through her long dark hair. “The Hope I knew won’t exist.”

She’s sad in a way Lincoln hasn’t seen before. “You said before that Hope grew up on a planet with only you and Diyoza. Now, she will get to grow up with our child. They’ll grow up chasing after Madi and Aden.”

Octavia smiles. “I do love the idea of that,” she says softly. “Our child and Hope will be almost the same age. Diyoza's six months pregnant. I’m five.” She sighs. “Four months until she’s born, four months until Praimfaya…I still don’t know where we'll be.”

“I thought Mount Weather?” Lincoln questions.

Octavia sighs. “So did I. But Clarke, Lexa, Bellamy, Echo and Raven are all planning to be in the bunker. Strategically, that’s where Lexa needs to be. That bunker will hold the most amount of the people from the clans. I just…I don’t know if I can go back down there.”

Lincoln strokes her head thoughtfully. “Heda and Clarke are going to Polis to orchestrate the Nightblood distribution soon, aren’t they?”

Octavia nods. “A group is going. Jackson and Nyko can manage any medical needs here while Abby leads the whole Nightblood project.”

“Then we’ll go with them,” he says with confidence. “That way, we can go into the bunker, together. Face your demons before Praimfaya so we know that you’ll be okay when the death wave hits.”

She nods thoughtfully. “Okay,” she agrees. “I’ll let Clarke know we want to go with them when we see them later.”

Lincoln settles down beside her, stroking her cheek. “Get some rest now, my love. You want to be well rested when you meet Diyoza again.”

“She can be hard to like,” she warns him, snuggling into his side. She rolled onto her side, laying her head on his chest right above his heart. The sound of his heartbeat letting her know he was here and alive was soothing. He wraps his arm securely around her, holding her close. She knows the days of lying in this comforting position were numbered, her growing bump was proving more and more difficult as the babe grew.

“I have patience,” he assures her. “If you love and trust her, and she’s good for you, then I will grow to like her.”

Octavia thinks of those years on Skyring. Diyoza was everything she needed. She was family. She taught her things others never did—not her mother, not Bellamy, not even Indra. She took a broken girl who was drowning in pain, fear and anger, and fixed her piece by piece. She helped her learn how to ease her pain, she taught her to face the internal fears and demons that haunted her and helped her manage her anger. She helped her see that she can’t place blame on everyone else, but also not to carry it all on her own shoulders. She was just a girl. A teenage girl whose circumstance and the cruelty of the world had battered, used, and spat out. A girl who had the weight of the world, of the entire human race, on her shoulders. Diyoza was a salve, soothing the scars left by her mother, by the circumstance of her existence, by being sent to earth like her life meant nothing, by every betrayal as her young heart yearned to be loved, by her brother turning on her, by Lincoln being executed in front of her, by every life she took in her pain and anger, by Ilian dying in the Conclave, by surviving the Conclave, by Praimfaya, by being separated from Bellamy and never hearing the “I love you” before the radios cut out, by becoming the leader of the human race at only seventeen, by the fighting pits, by the Dark Year, by every adult in her life backing away and leaving her to bare it all, by Blodreina, by six whole years underground, by her brother refusing to hear her out, by the gorge, by everything that has ever gone wrong in her life and piled her up.

“She’s going to be shocked,” she says, hand gliding down her bump. “In a good way,” she assures him with a sleepy smile.

“Good.” He presses his lips to her forehead lovingly. “Now rest. We have a long day ahead of us.”

****

“We could end up at war if this does not happen carefully,” Lexa tells Clarke, sitting wearily on the edge of their bed, shoulders slumping down as if the weight of the world was pressing them down. She was exhausted down to her bones. They had been up all night preparing for Eligius to come down today.

Between traveling from the island and getting no sleep, and then planning for a ship of former criminals to land all night, Lexa was overwhelmed and utterly exhausted. Knowing what loomed over them—turning everyone into Nightbloods, figuring out who went where, dodging potential assassination attempts once everyone had the blood, and then Praimfaya itself, the young Commander was more troubled than ever before.

Clarke laid Madi on the other bed where Aden was still asleep in, knowing the boy would be awake soon and could watch her if needed. Madi had slept in Lexa’s tired arms almost all through the night and would wake well rested in a few mere hours as well. She walked to the bed, sitting beside her love.

“We need sleep, Lex,” Clarke says, fighting a yawn.

“Who will watch the kids?” she asks wearily but allows Clarke to guide her down to lay down.

“Aden can keep watch over Madi. If they wake us up, we can send them to spend time with the other Natblidas.”

Lexa fights to keep her heavy eyelids open. “That woman on the radio is not a threat?” Lexa questions again. The woman’s exclamation of “holy crap, is there ever an adult in charge?” played in the young Commander’s mind despite Clarke’s earlier reassurance. She remembers Clarke telling her about how the adult Skaikru members tried to take over upon landing because they didn’t want children in charge, despite the fact that the children knew they ground, the people and had already fought a war with Trikru. Lexa worried what would happen if this new woman from the sky challenged her while the clans were so tense from the impending doom.

Before, Lexa didn’t fear death. But now, she had Clarke, Aden and Madi. She knew that right now more than ever her leadership was in danger. She knew the chances of assassination were higher than before. She was being labeled as the “greatest Commander of all time.” She is the only Commander to ever swear their life to another, with plans to be bonded. The only Commander to ever have children. She was changing the ways of their people and turning everyone into the sacred Natblidas, which could put herself and the other true blooded Natblidas in danger. She was leading the clans through Praimfaya, and many had bad memories of the prior apocalypse. She died before the former Praimfaya—she was going in blind, relying on Clarke, Madi, Indra, and others input for their survival. Accepting those from Eligius, who many also had bad memories of, and putting herself in the position of being challenged, could do a lot more harm than good.

“She’s not a threat to us. We’ll ensure we only wake those who are not a threat.” Clarke sighs. “She’s pregnant, Lexa. About as far along as Octavia. She just wants the best for Hope. Ruling the human race of planet Earth is not what she’ll want. She has a strong personality, but she means well…she listens to Kane, and he has a lot of respect for you. We’ll be okay.” She kisses her, stroking her hair back. “Sleep now, ai hodnes.”

She smiles softly when Lexa’s breathing finally evens out. She lays her own head down beside her, closing her heavy eyelids and letting sleep wash over her.

****

Bellamy sat on the edge of the bed, watching Echo wearily. He rubbed his face with his hand, shaking his head. He was exhausted. They had traveled a long way from the island to TonDC, having no more than a few mere hours of downtime before being thrust into the call from Eligius and staying up all night planning. He had wanted nothing more than to collapse into bed and sleep half the day away with Echo’s warm body in his arms, but she had been restless since they returned to their tent.

He didn’t have to wonder too long what was bothering his lover. “I spent five years training to be them, and then another three months becoming them.” He never asked her about those five years she spent on another planet, and she never offered any details. Those memories were too raw about his betrayal and then death. He knew she spent those years with Hope. Hope, who was now an unborn babe. He knew the same thought haunted his sister, too. He knew the Hope that Octavia knew and the Hope that Echo knew were different people. He wondered if they ever talked about her with each other.

“Echo.”

She looks up from the pile of clothes she was refolding. When something was bothering her, she never wanted idle hands. She lets out a weary sigh and she gets up, striding over to the bed. She sits beside him but doesn’t meet his gaze. Bellamy misses the island suddenly. Those few months were uncomplicated. Lounging in bed, chasing after Madi and Aden, supporting Octavia and discussing the potential of bringing their own child into the world.

They had been back for not even a full twenty-four hours, and she was already distancing herself.

“I spent months with Diyoza,” Echo starts. Bellamy looks at her, shocked that she’s choosing to bring this up, but he doesn’t voice it. He stays quiet to allow her to gather her thoughts. “Some time in Shallow Valley, but mostly on Bardo. That’s where Octavia and I started to become a team, I suppose. We were on the same side. Both of us having a connection to Hope helped. Diyoza was older, smarter, she kept the three of us all on the same team despite any past grievances. All three of us wanted revenge, Diyoza wanted a future. I wanted revenge for what we assumed was your death, so did Octavia until she started bonding with Levitt. Hope wanted revenge for her lost childhood and Dev's death. None of us could see beyond our emotions. I guess that’s why the teachers always preached to us that love is weakness.”

“Echo.”

“I’m not saying that it is, Bellamy.” She finally looks at him, and her expression is unreadable. “Being with you makes me stronger than I’ve ever been. But losing you? I killed Orlando.” She thinks of the look of horror on Hope’s face, the pain and betrayal on Orlando’s, and the ache in her already numb chest when she learned of his suicide. “We needed to get to Bardo to save you and Octavia. A disciple came at me from behind, and Hope killed them. Orlando was upset, they were his people. But I needed to save my people. I chose to leave him behind on Penance with no way off. Then we learned he had killed himself after our betrayal...my betrayal.”

“You didn’t kill him, Echo.”

“No, but my actions caused it. I may as well had killed him myself. And then Diyoza’s death…”

“How did she die?” he asks when she’s quiet too long.

“On Bardo, they had Gem9. It was a weapon that could wipe out a whole civilization by crystalizing them forever. Cadogan had it saved on Bardo’s weapon room. I stole it, and convinced Hope to get Octavia, Diyoza, Raven, Clarke, and the others out. I didn’t plan on making it out alive. They weren’t about to let me die, though. It was Raven who got me to hand over the Gem9. She refused to leave. She told me that you wouldn’t want me to commit genocide for revenge, and that she would not leave me. If I was going to die doing it, she was going to die with me.” Bellamy reminds himself to thank Raven later. He places a hand on her back, rubbing her back in small circles so as not to overwhelm her. “When Anders sentenced me, Hope slit his throat and ran to the water source I planned to release the Gem9 into. She plunged the syringe and Diyoza caught it with her hand. She crystallized in front of us all. Octavia was dragging Hope backwards and she was screaming. She carried more guilt for her mother’s death than I did. Diyoza’s last words was telling Hope to be better.”

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there for all of you.”

“You died, or so we thought. I know there’s doubt about if Diyoza is a threat or not. The woman I trained with in Bardo for months with was very different than the woman who had landed in Shallow Valley. The woman I trained with kept us alive and motivated. After I stole the Gem9, she kept everyone at bay and talked down Anders and the disciples. Before Hope killed Anders, Diyoza had it that nobody besides me would be punished. Anders let his disgust for us all known, but nobody would have paid. The only ones who paid that day were Anders and Diyoza with their lives. It broke Hope and knocked sense into me. She’s someone we want on our side. I trust her, Bellamy.”

“And Hope?”

“I miss her every day. I spent five years with Hope and Gabriel on Skyring…Penance. I’ll probably miss her for the rest of my life. I’ll never get her back; she’ll just be the kid growing up with Octavia’s child.”

“I’m so sorry, Echo.” He wraps an arm around her, hugging her tight for as long as she would allow it. “Have you talked to O about this?”

She nods against his shoulder. “I have. We both miss her in different ways. I love hearing stories from when she was a child, and Octavia enjoys the stories of her from our time on Skyring. We both understand missing her.”

She lifts her head, and she looks more tired now. “You’re right. We really should get some sleep before Eligius comes down.”

They settle in bed, Bellamy behind her, arm around her waist securely. As they start to drift off, Bellamy says to her softly, “thank you for telling me.”

****

“We should get going, my love,” Lincoln says, feeling much more rested.

“I just need a moment,” is Octavia’s response. She pulls him down to her, pressing her lips to his. He kisses her deeply, pulling her flush against him, careful of her growing bump. “It’s going to get crazy soon. We have time, I want to take it,” she whispers against his lips. “Just a few more minutes.”

He allows her that. He rests his forehead against hers, soaking in the moment. One last moment of peace before the looming chaos. Eligius coming down would throw everything into a frenzy. Then, the trip to Polis would be tiring. He would try his damdest to get her into the Rover instead of travelling on horseback. He knew spending their visit in the bunker would take an emotional toll on her, but they both knew she needed that before Praimfaya came. And then Praimfaya—living in the bunker that made her live in a living hell, an apocalypse, and giving birth to their daughter all at once would take quite the toll.

“I’m ready,” she says with a nod.

They left their tent, hand in hand. They made their way over to the group that was setting out to meet Eligius at their designated drop site. They were landing by the lake not too far from the dropship. They approached Clarke and Lexa, who were standing with both children. Octavia wonders if they were coming.

“Let’s hope this goes smoother than last time,” Murphy’s voice sounds behind them.

“Don’t make counter deals and it should,” Octavia’s eyes flit to Echo who approaches, hand in hand with Bellamy much like she was with Lincoln.

“Wasn’t solely on me,” Murphy argues but there’s no bite to it.

“Sure it wasn’t,” Raven laughs.

Octavia shares a look with Clarke and Lexa, equally as confused as them but enjoying the playful banter regardless.

“I wasn’t that involved,” Emori put her hands up with a cheeky grin, “this time.”

“This time,” Raven snorts. Emori elbows her with a playful smile.

When Kane walks over to them, Lexa faces the group. “Everyone is here. Are you all ready?” When she gets a collection of heads bobbing and verbal agreement, she lets Gustus lead the way. Her Fosgona was paving the way, though they didn’t think they’d find threats in the woods. Not today, anyways. There was a group of warriors flocking the group, ensuring the Commander and the two young Nightbloods’ safety. Indra had taken it upon herself to make sure her young second and her unborn child stayed safe.

The group is quiet for the most part. Gustus led the way with a few other trusted warriors. Lexa and Clarke were quietly walking close, Aden sandwiched between them. Madi clung to Lexa, sitting on her hip. Anya walked beside her, keeping her body between the child and the woods. That was her intent, anyways, until Raven ended up between her and the woods. Part of Anya wanted to switch places with her lover and be closest to potential harm. But she knew her best position was beside her Heda and Madi. If danger arose, she had to be prepared to shield them, or even to quickly grab the child if needed. Behind them, Murphy and Emori walked practically glued to each other. Clarke had been curious about them coming, but they were pivotal to their team, so she understood it. They were there for Bellamy, Echo, and Raven. Their people.

Octavia and Lincoln were nestled in the middle of the group. Lincoln had a firm hold on Octavia’s hand. Indra shadowed the girl and while the warrior in her wanted to protest, the newly mother part of her wanted her to stay close. Bellamy and Echo were close behind them. Bellamy was watching Echo and Octavia equally. Octavia also knew if she looked behind her that she’d find Kane hovering her, trying to make up for all those years of missing out being her father.

They all arrived after a long, uneventful walk. They didn’t have to wait long; they heard the sonic boom as the massive ship came through the atmosphere. They watched, some in fear, some in dread, some in awe and others in hope, as the ship drew closer, brighter. The ship skillfully landed by the water, leaving a safe distance from the waiting crowd.

Anya spared a look at Raven. She was never a jealous woman, but when Raven told her that she had loved the captain of this very ship, and this captain was joining them when it landed, she felt something that she could only assume was jealousy. It was the same feeling she got whenever she saw Raven smiling brightly and laughing with Emori or Luna.

Octavia tried to weasel her way to the front of the group, but she felt both Lincoln and Bellamy holding her back. Until they were certain there was no threat, they were not letting her be front and center.

“I need to see her,” she pants, but she lets them keep her back.

“Once we see her, I'll let you go.” It’s the best Bellamy can offer, and she relents. She knows Lincoln is still hesitant, but she trusts Diyoza with her life.

“It seems bigger than before, Mom,” Madi says, peering around at Clarke. Both women knew the child was anxious when she slipped into her native tongue.

“You’re smaller than before,” Clarke says with a tense smile.

“Will they recognize me?” Madi’s big blue eyes scans the ship. She remembered the Eligius from before clearly. She never got to witness Diyoza the hero, she just knew what she had been told in this lifetime.

“Maybe. Once they hear your name, they will.”

“Maybe…don’t say my name at first.”

“What should we call you?”

Madi shrugs, resting her head on Lexa’s shoulder. “Just you kid for right now.”

“Okay, little one.”

The ship hisses as the ramp drops and they all watch with bated breath. The criminals filed out; Diyoza had been right—there weren’t many awake.

Octavia's green eyes search the group, and they settle on her. Just a handful of the Eligius crew started to approach the group tediously. Diyoza was leading them as the designated leader. Nikki and Hatch were among the few, and so was Miles Shaw.

“Bell,” Octavia complained, pulling her arm and her brother let her go. She gives Lincoln a pleading look and he lets her go but he follows closely behind her as she moves forward. Her eyes don’t leave the older woman, and she can tell the moment Diyoza notices her moving through the crowd.

“Diyoza helped me past that darkness, it’s behind me now. I have Hope. Diyoza's a pain in the ass, but I love her.”

When Octavia reaches her, she throws her arms around her. She doesn't care that she has an audience in this moment, and she knew those who were important enough to care knew the situation.

Diyoza hugs her back fiercely. She can still see it in her head—the shock and absolute terror on Octavia’s face as she drug Hope out of the room as she crystallized. It had hurt, the dark crystals forming across her whole body. Her last dying wish, she had pleased to Hope to not waste her life, to be better. In her final moments, she prayed Octavia would do absolutely everything in her power to ensure Hope didn’t go down the dark path. She had cried tears of joy when she learned that she had succeeded and that Hope had found peace, and even love, settled on a beach with her newfound family.

She lets Octavia go, scanning her up and down to assure that she was okay. She pauses, eyes zeroing in on her stomach, and then on the man hovering behind her.

“Things have certainly changed since last time, that’s for sure.” There’s a twinkle in her blue eyes, and Octavia feels at piece for just a moment. Her eyes flit to Diyoza and notices that unlike herself, Diyoza’s stomach was decidedly flat. She looks at her with concern for am explanation. Diyoza just smiles.

Chapter 52: Hope

Notes:

Hi, everyone! Sorry I disappeared again. I took an 8 week college course while working full time which took all of my free time away. But I'm back! I had one hell of a day baking in mid 90s heat at a competition and spent a decent chunk of it on horseback which has resulted in heat exhaustion, a migraine and an injured foot so hopefully this flows together at least decently for you guys! I wanted to just get this chapter out there so I will come back and edit if need be tomorrow after I get some sleep.

“Hope?”  

That's all Octavia could ask. Her eyes scan around the soldiers behind Diyoza. Diyoza was not far enough along when she awoke from cryo last time for the baby to have survived being born yet, at least she didn’t think so. Nine months is what everyone told her. Eight, maybe .  

“She’s in the ship,” Diyoza responds after what seemed like far too long.  

Octavia was itching to go onto the ship and see the baby alive and healthy. But Diyoza was the leader of the citizens of Eligius, and she needed to talk with Lexa before bringing her aboard.  

Diyoza moved beside Octavia and the two walked back to her group.  

“I can take her,” Echo said quietly behind the Commander. Lexa nodded and turned, passing Madi to her. Aden wordlessly moved so he was standing between Echo and Bellamy. Lexa let out a breath, knowing the children were safe. She and Clarke shared a look before the two moved forward to meet the Eligius leader.  

She heard footsteps behind her, and she knew both Anya and Gustus were on their heels.  

“Hello.” Diyoza was the first to speak. The Commander’s age was on the tip of her tongue, but she held it back. She wasn’t as young as Madi was, but she was still a damn kid . And a kid who had a lot more people to lead than Madi had.  

“Hello,” Lexa said back. Her tone wasn’t very friendly, but it wasn’t hostile either.  

“Hello, Clarke,” Diyoza said. This kid she knew.  

“Diyoza,” Clarke gives her a tight smile and a nod. She was younger than before, but the look in her eyes were as seasoned as before. She had seen a lot, and the memory of before still had a hold on the teen, Diyoza could tell. She wondered how much the young Commander had seen. “I’m glad you landed safely. Is this all who are awake?”  

“There are some more on the ship, but not many. McCreary and his followers are all asleep.”  

Clarke nods. “If I can’t have this valley, then no one can have it.” That had been playing in her head since they announced that they were coming down.  

“What are your intentions?” Lexa asks suddenly. Her hands are clasped behind her back and she’s standing up straight, face serious. It had been a long time since Clarke had seen Lexa so much like a Commander that there was no separation. The last time she had seen her lover so guarded and serious was when Titus and Nia had been executed.  

“To survive,” Diyoza says simply. “To live.” She inhales and Clarke figures what she is about to say is difficult for her. “We recognize this...whatever it is—”  

“Coalition,” Octavia tells her.  

“We recognize this coalition. And recognize you as the Commander. We just want to survive. Look, everyone we woke up are good people. Hard working. We'll all earn our keep; I can promise you that much. On our ship, we can rescue everyone in that bunker once those five years are up. Our technology is extraordinarily advanced compared to your friends from the Ark. We want the human race to survive.”  

Lexa nods. “Alright. You may stay. But if your people cannot stay in line...”  

“They will.”  

“They better.”  

The Commander’s brilliant green eyes stared sharply at the Colonel, who stared right back with light blue eyes. It was Octavia who broke the stare. “ Now can I see Hope?” She asks impatiently, like a child who had been waiting for far too long.  

“May I bring her onto the ship?” She almost grimaces—asking a child permission for something was not something she was in the habit of.  

“She may,” Lexa says, brow furrowed.  

“Echo can come with me,” Octavia says to placate. Bellamy wanted to protest but a look from Echo kept him quiet. Of course, Echo would be safe, of course she could keep his sister safe. He could admit to himself that Echo could keep Octavia safer than he could. She had been a quick study with the use of guns and could take almost anybody in hand-to-hand combat. Echo was a force to be reckoned with. So was his sister, who could hold her own against Skaikru and the grounders alike.  

Lincoln, though, did protest. “I’m going with you.”  

Octavia gave him pleading eyes. She needed to do this. She needed this moment. The only one among them who understood what this moment meant was Echo. A moment to reunite with an infant who was the girl they both loved but would never be the same.  

“She’ll be safe,” Diyoza assures him. Lincoln still hesitates to let her go onto this ship without him for protection, not while she carried their child. He didn’t know this woman.  

“Echo will keep her safe,” Bellamy says. If there’s anything Bellamy is confident of, it’s that. And Lincoln relents. Everything in the warrior wanted to be by her side every step of the way, but he knew that sometimes, he had to let her take steps on her own. Nikki and Hatch stayed as well as a group of the Eligius crew, greeting old friends and familiarizing themselves with new while Diyoza and a few soldiers led the two women onto the ship.  

“Are you okay?” Echo whispers, slipping easily into Trigedasleng once they’re inside the ship.  

Octavia gives a small nod with a tight-lipped smile. “Are you?”  

Echo gives a nod. She swallows a lump in her throat that shouldn’t belong. Even after all this time, she still balked at feelings, forgetting she’s Spacekru and not an Azgeda spy who’d be whipped for showing emotions on her stoic face. “Are you ready?” She knows her voice is thick with emotion when Octavia’s face softens.  

“Are you?”  

Echo shakes her head this time. It’s closure, but it also isn’t. It's finalizing a somber feeling that ached deep in their chests. It's saying goodbye to a person who was such a pivotal figure in each of their lives at different times.  

“Me neither.” It’s hard for Octavia to admit, but it’s Hope .  

“Just through here,” Diyoza says. There's a joyful tone to her voice, and Octavia almost hates it. Diyoza got a second chance to raise her child, but they all also lost something.  

They enter to meet Hope.  

It's Hope .   

“Auntie O!”  

It's not a newborn writing in a bundle. It’s not a small child. It's Hope . Their Hope. She's wrapping Octavia in a tight hug. Octavia hugs her back tightly, tears of happiness rolling down her cheeks. “I missed you,” Hope says like a child.  

Octavia lets her go, cupping her face. “Let me see you.” Hope leaned into her touch with a watery smile. Then she noticed the woman behind them. Octavia let her go, moving slightly as Hope launched forward again.  

“Echo!”  

Echo hugged her tightly, trying to blink away tears. She had just grieved losing her and here she was, r eal . “I missed you, too,” Hope said. “I really missed you both.” Echo clung to one on the closest friends she’d ever had. They eventually release, and Hope holds out her hand towards Octavia who happily takes it.  

“We never thought we’d see you again.” It’s Echo who admits it.  

“God, we were both so happy when Mom told us we were going to Earth so we could see our families.”  

Octavia raises her eyebrows while Echo gives a confused look. “We?”  

Chapter 53: I Didn't Choose This

Notes:

This was intended to be a welcome to the Eligius Crew, and it started that way, but then I got hit so hard with the Clexa feels. I'm not mad about that. Those two are the heart and soul of this fanfiction, but I do try my best to feature others. I promise I will actually feature Murphy and Emori in the next chapter, I have gotten some requests in the comments to give them scenes. Monty/Harper will also get some screen time for the next chapter as well.

“God, we were both so happy when Mom told us we were going to Earth so we could see our families.”    

Octavia raises her eyebrows while Echo gives a confused look. “We?”     

Hope looked over her shoulder, calling out, “you can come out now.”   

Octavia and Echo exchange a look of confusion and curiosity. Surely, it was a friend and not a foe. Hope wouldn’t corner them with a foe. Diyoza wouldn’t lead them into a trap. Echo's shoulder sag in relief when the person appears, while Octavia’s jaw drops. “Jordan?”    

“It’s good to see you both,” he says with Harper’s smile. “Are the others here, too?”   

Echo moves to him, and he embraces her. “Outside,” Octavia manages to say. “This is going to be really weird. You being older than your parents and all.”  

Jordan pauses. He didn’t think about that part, not yet anyways. “How—how old are they?”  

“Seventeen.”   

He swallows. He hadn’t expected them to be that young. “Yeah, that might be...weird. I don’t--I saw the video that I showed some people of my parents on the log. They were young, but not—I don’t think they were that young. Them before me, them when I was a kid. They were adults when I was growing up. Like, actual adults. I was twenty-three when I chose to go into cryo.”  

“My mom’s younger than I remember,” Hope offers. “Though she’s not...younger than me.”  

“Are my parents out there?” Jordan asks, shuffling his feet. The jolliness was fading, replaced with some apprehension, but also hope.  

Echo shook her head. “No, they stayed back. We had a lot of people of high importance come here, so we needed some people who were important to stay behind to protect TonDC. Monty and Harper volunteered to stay. So did Abby, Roan and Miller.”  

“Clarke and Bellamy, Murphy and Emori, are they out there?”  

“They are.”  

“It honestly...it’d probably be easier to see them first.”   

“Your parents, they’re proud of you, you know,” Octavia tell him. “We told them about you. We told them about the Last War . You gave us all the advantage to win a war without fighting. They like peace, especially Monty. Your mom was a soldier, but she fought for peace.”   

“They’re great people,” he nods. “I never saw them interact with anyone else before, just them making the video log and through stories, but I know that they’re great people.”  

“They really are.” Echo nods. While Octavia had been friends with them first, mainly Monty, being part of the 100, it was Echo who had become closer to them. Spending six years with seven people on a ring in space brought people close in ways that most people could never fully understand.   

“Ready to go see everyone?” Octavia asks the two.   

“Ready,” Jordan says.   

“Ready,” Hope responds with a smile.   

****   

“How far along are you?” Diyoza asks, watching the girl twirling the hilt of one of her knives between her fingers.   

“About four and a half months,” Octavia replies, eyes flitting up from her knife to the older woman. “We’ve been on the ground for seven.” She sighs and it’s heavy, weighing her down. “Five months until Praimfaya, five months until this kid is born. Kind of shitty timing.”  

“I’ll say.”  

Octavia's hand still and she fully looks at her. The corner of her mouth twitches into a small smile. If most people had brazenly agreed that the timing was unfortunate, she’d have become angry or even hurt. But it was Diyoza , and she knew there was no accusation or even pity there. Just facts. “Hope’s all grown up.”   

“You know, I was bummed when I came to that realization. I didn’t get a chance to fix things for her. But then I really thought about it—we did a damn good job raising that kid. We were a family . I don’t think Hope could get raised here the way you and I raised her on Skyring. I wouldn’t want to take that away from any of us. Hope asked about you and Echo since we all woke up. She’s taking coming back well, especially since she has that kid Jordan.” She eyes Octavia. “How worried should I be about them?”   

“I can lay on her the joys of pregnancy,” she says with a wry smile. Diyoza scoffs. “She’s not stupid, don’t worry too much. It’s young love, it wasn’t serious yet before.”  

Diyoza surveys her for a moment before asking her, “were you being stupid?”   

Octavia swallows. “It wasn’t intentional. We just weren’t careful enough. I think I just didn’t care enough to be. I lost him in the before, a long time ago. I never truly moved on, as the years went on, the ache lessened but never healed. He was the one .” Her green eyes glistened with tears; he was alive and safe, but the memories of watching his execution and the pain that followed would haunt her forever. Diyoza wrapped an arm around her shoulder, hugging her close. She wasn’t a hugger, but it was different with Octavia.   

“I would love a proper introduction to him, when you’re ready,” Diyoza says, chin on top of her head. “I think he would, too.” She chuckles and thinks about the man who hovered, ready to do whatever it took to protect her. The guarded look he gave her despite the girl’s reassurance. Diyoza isn’t sure she’s ever seen someone love somebody the way he clearly loved her.   

Octavia sniffs. “Probably…it’s a girl, did I tell you that?”   

“No,” she murmurs, combing her fingers through the girls long dark hair soothingly.  

“I’m going to be a mom. It’s because of you and Hope that I feel like I can actually do this. I thought by the time you came down, you’d be meeting my six year old kid. You get to be here from the start. I really like that.”   

Diyoza strokes her head with a smile, a semblance of peace on her face. “I really like that, too.”   

****   

“We have to plan for another trip,” Clarke sighs, fingers running through Lexa’s loose curls. She was undoing her braids from the long, overwhelming meetings with the council and the new Eligius members. Those from the clans were uneasy; they trusted their Commander, but it still put them on edge. With Praimfaya so close, the news of everyone becoming a nightblood still so new, Clarke feared for Lexa’s life more than she had before. She was worried that this unease would never fade. Once the clans were all Natblidas, anyone could try to assassinate her to take her place.  

“We only have five months until Praimfaya,” Lexa murmurs, exhausted. “The trip to Polis is due. Your friend Murphy said they’ve collected the... key to enter the bunker. We can take a week to settle now that these new…sky people are here. But after, we must head to Polis to distribute the nightblood and get well versed with the bunker. Octavia stated that food became an issue, and they had to resort to eating those executed. We won’t be in the bunker that long, but we should be well prepared in case of anything.”  

“Be prepared for anything,” Clarke agrees, fingernails scratching her scalp. Lexa’s head falls back slightly.  

“I can feel you thinking, Clarke.”  

“Raven is taking a team to the closest reactor when we head to Polis to see if they can shut it down before it blows. Maybe spare this whole area from Praimfaya. Here, Shallow Valley, surrounding clans, maybe even Becca’s Island.”  

“We are hoping for that. We are saving more people that can be sustained in a small valley. Fighting will be inevitable in we fit thirteen clans and these new Eligius Crew into one area for the rest of our lives.”  

“After Praimfaya and we settle into our new normal once the levels are low...anyone could take the flame.”  

“Clarke.”  

“What if we let it?”  

Lexa turns her head to look behind her at the love. Her brow furrows, wondering where Clarke’s mind was going.  

“Maybe someday, you and I will owe nothing more to our people.” Lexa’s face softens at the quote. It felt like a lifetime ago when Lexa had uttered those very words. She had been killed a few mere hours after. “What if we won’t? Owe anyone anything? We get them through Praimfaya and after...what if we didn’t have to live like this anymore?”  

“Where would we go?” Lexa entertains the idea. They both know they would likely never follow through, but it was nice to dream of a happily ever after.  

“Becca’s Island,” Clarke says, nodding. “We’d take Aden and Madi and any of our friends who wanted to and go live there. It's a big house, running water, food, the lab. We could survive there. The lower levels of the lab survived Praimfaya, if the death wave didn’t take it out the island would be a perfect place to spend forever at.” She sits on the bed in front of her, brushing Lexa’s hair back, cupping her face. “I can’t lose you again.”  

“I know.” Lexa swallows. Her duty had always been to her people, but there had been a shift. She could tell how her safety weighed on Clarke. She could feel her own anxiety at the idea of leaving Madi and Aden behind. “ If the reactor is able to be stopped.”  

“Would you really?” Clarke asks, though she’s pretty sure she knows the answer.  

“I would.” The confession shocks both herself and Clarke. They're both silent, mulling over what that meant for them both. “I think this is why the preached so much that love was weakness. Not because it made anyone weak, but because it could make a Commander waver from their duty. But I... I didn’t choose this.” Lexa has this faraway look in her eyes. Clarke could tell she was processing; Lexa rarely talked about her upbringing and Clarke had never pushed. She stroked her hair silently, allowing her to process and speak freely. “I was born a Nightblood. My life was mapped out for me from the moment I was born. I was destined to either become the Commander or to die. I didn’t get to grow up with my family or to form friendships or play with other children. I was trained to kill and rule from the moment I could comprehend anything. Everything I did from the moment I arrived as a novitiate was chosen for me. Where I slept, what I ate, who I interacted with. Be silent, listen, obey. When we didn’t ...I was Titus’ favorite and he let me get away with things the other maybe wouldn’t because he was so sure I would be the next Commander, but that didn’t make me safer. I did my best to follow what we had to do. I was silent, I listened, and I tried to obey. There was a guard that had it out for me. To this day, I don’t know why he hurt me. Maybe it was because I was the youngest, or I was Trikru or because Titus favorited me. Then, the conclave came where I was forced to kill or be killed. I killed so many of the kids I spent years with. I grew up with those children, much like how my Natblidas have. That's why I cannot allow there to be another conclave. No child should have to be forced to kill their friends, their family . And Costia...despite Titus’ warnings, I grew close to her. And then she was killed. And I finally believed them when they said love was weakness. I was good at my job. I was good at leading, at forming alliances and uniting warring clans. But then I met you.” Her eyes flickered to Clarke for the first time since she started talking. “I’m tired , Clarke.”  

Clarke wraps her arms around her, holding her tightly. She knew Lexa wasn’t talking about her lack of sleep—she was tired of leading, of making the choices for thousands of people. They were just kids . She pressed a kiss to the side of Lexa’s head. “I know, ai hodnes,” Clarke breathes. Clarke had felt that tiredness down to her bones before, time after time. She wanted better for them. She needed it better for Madi and Aden and for Octavia’s child and all the other children to come. “After Praimfaya, we can be free of this,” Clarke says. "We will figure this out, my love. I promise.” She feels Lexa nod into her shoulder. “I love you, so much.”  

She had made the mistake before of never telling her. She made a promise to herself that she would remind her, every chance she got, for the rest of their lives.  

Chapter 54: Tomorrow

“You don’t have to come.” Emori studied Murphy, willing him to listen, but not expecting that he will. “ John .”  

“If you go, I go.”  

“Raven needs me. That's the only reason—it’s going to be dangerous, John.”  

“Once a cockroach, always a cockroach, right?” The corner of her mouth twitches into a smirk. He felt someone that he could only describe as unexplainable love surge through his chest when he sees that smirk. “Plus, if you succeed, I want to be mentioned in the history books.”  

“Nobody’s writing books anymore,” she informs him with a chuckle.  

“Who knows? Maybe someone might one day. Changing the world to be better and whatnot. Going to be a lot more survivors than last time if Raven can pull this off.”  

“There’ll be more survivors even if we can’t pull this off.”  

“Picture all the clans, plus Skaikru, plus these Eligius assholes, all living in that valley or on an Earth with no water sources or green? This needs to be pulled off or we’re all fucked.”  

“John.”  

“Or there’s the option of the rock from hell. New planets and all that, roll the dice to see what one we land on.”  

“John.”  

“Sorry.” He rubs the back of his neck, sighing. “End of the world never brings the best out in me.”  

“I remember.”  

“This needs to be pulled off. You see all these little kids running around everywhere? Madi?” Emori’s face softens, and Murphy’s does as well. The two had spent a lot of time with Madi before, when Clarke was on the rescue mission. Murphy had helped her through her panic attacks, they had protected her from being a flameless Heda, from Sheidheda, had been locked in a reactor to protect her. “And Octavia’s pregnant, so there’s a real , tiny baby who’ll be making her appearance right around the time the death wave comes. Those kids don’t need to die in a war for the only sustainable valley. They should get to be kids . To grow up better than we did. And who knows who’ll follow next with having kids.”  

“Bellamy and Echo,” Emori answers without hesitation.  

Murphy snorts. “Probably.” He eyes Emori. “Don’t even think about it.”  

“You’d be a really good dad, you know.”  

“To a teenager,” he says half-heartedly. Madi was thirteen , not a baby.  

“One day, maybe,” she shrugs. “Or not. Whatever happens. We will pull this off, and we’ll have forever to think about our future. But we need to have a future to think about.” She nods. “We’re going to pull this off. Raven, me, Monty, Jenna.” She inhales deeply. “If you’re insistent on coming for emotional support, then I imagine Harper will be coming as well.”  

“It’s Harper. Of course she’s going.”  

“Even with Jordan back?”  

Murphy stares at her for a moment. “Jordan is technically older than them, which is kind of disturbing. Almost as bad as Hope being older than Octavia now, even when Octavia was an adult when she disappeared into the woods with pregnant Diyoza days before adult Hope showed up.”  

Emori just hums. “Maybe planet hopping is a bad idea after all.”  

“It was a bad idea before that. But yes, time dilation is a bitch.”  

****  

“Are you ready?”  

Octavia looks up from the pack she’s zipping, glancing over her shoulder at Indra. She was grateful, so grateful, that Indra was travelling with them to Polis the next day. Indra knew more than almost anyone of the trauma she had endured in that bunker. Diyoza knew the aftermath, she had helped her heal from the aftermath, but Indra was there. They had failed each other, but she was still there .  

“All packed.”  

Indra walked into the tent, walking over to her. “You know that’s not what I meant.”  

Octavia fiddled with the strap on her pack with one hand, the other one held protectively over her protruding bump. At nineteen weeks, she was having a harder time hiding the bump. Between the bump that was growing, Lincoln’s hovering, Indra’s protectiveness and her stepping down from all training, she didn’t need to feel paranoid when she received glances. She knew it was being pieced together; it was awful timing indeed. She's just thankful that her near sacrifice during the battle at the mountain, her relationship with the Commander and often having Aden and Madi on her heels had almost completely diminished the whispers of Blodreina . Now, she was just the chief seken who was stupidly pregnant just in time for Praimfaya.  

“As ready as I could be, I guess. Diyoza offered for me to stay in the Eligius ship.” She sees Indra tense up. She doesn’t know if Indra and Diyoza would ever truly like each other, but she hoped they would be able to be civil one day, preferably soon. Both women loved Octavia almost like a daughter, and both felt responsible for her. They both knew her at different times in her life, and she needed them both now . “I’m going to be in the bunker, Indra. I need—I need to face this. I wish she could come into the bunker with us, but she needs to be the leader up there. And... she has Hope.” She swallows. “I need Lincoln, you, Bellamy, Echo. I need my family around me. Diyoza and Hope are my family. The bunker just houses everyone ese that I need.”  

Indra just simply nods. “You need to rest well tonight. We have quite the journey in the morning. You can ride in the wagon.”  

“I wish I could just ride Helios—"  

“If you’re careful.”  

She pauses. She expected her to tell her that there was no way she was getting on a horse. She expected her to list the reasons why she should sit in a cart and not take an unnecessary risk, like long distance walking or riding her horse.  

Indra studies her. “When I was pregnant with Gaia, I didn’t allow myself to be treated like I was fragile. I still hunted, and led my people, and rode my horse. I did everything I did before, besides going into battle. I allowed her father to hover, those close to hover because you can’t be too safe in this kind of life. I even trained. I trained because I refused to be the pregnant woman who got ambushed and could not defend herself.” Octavia stares at her. She felt that longing again. The longing again of missing her life before she pregnant, but the fear of losing the miracle inside of her pulling at the seams of that longing. “Be who you are, Octavia. Be safe, be careful, but don’t let others force you down. What you do need to do, is get plenty of rest so you can safely ride your horse on the long trek to Polis tomorrow.”  

“If Lincoln lets me,” she says with both a scoff and a chuckle.  

“There’s little that he wouldn’t let you do, and you know that.”  

This time, it is a chuckle. Indra pulls her into a hug. She's not a hugger, but for Octavia, she might always be one. Tomorrow would be a long day, indeed.  

Chapter 55: Plans Unfolding

“This thing is so cool!” Jenna says as she looks around the Eligius ship. Raven spared the redhead a glance before focusing on the screens in front of her.   

She had been a little surprised that Diyoza had agreed to fly the group to the reactors. Nikki and Hatch had even helped the group load up their anti-radiation suits and supplies. “You’re sticking with us this time, right?” was Hatch’s way to offer his services. Again . Raven had assured them that she was running point on the whole thing, boots on the ground, when she saw Nikki stiffen.   

Raven was beginning to feel some confidence in the mission. If they could stop even one reactor, it could spare a portion of the clans. The death wave would still likely decimate a large majority of the animal population, but the greenery and buildings would stay. The priority was preserving Polis—it would also spare Trikru lands which included Arkadia, most of Azgeda, parts of Blue Cliff and Rockline, and quite possible Becca’s Island. There were a few reactors on the radar, but the one that kept Polis safe was the one to save if they could only shut down one . Polis was the heart of the clans, and it needed to be preserved.   

The ragtag group of them had grown from the original small group. Raven was running point with the bright minds of Emori and Monty. They had recruited Jenna after the promise she had shown in shutting down the acid fog in the mountain and aiding in the disabling of the missile. Murphy had volunteered—not only to stick with Emori but because he had been one of the people who fixed the pipes in Sanctum. Harper wanted to come with Monty, and she was another body and helper; she had been vital in readying the rocket to go to the ring before the death wave last time. Jordan had chosen to come, despite the fact he had trouble being around his now teenage parents. An eye in the sky as they were shutting down, per say Hope was also on board and eager to help, from the sky only Diyoza had insisted. Hatch and his friends had volunteered, again. And Nikki had reluctantly offered her services. Another body, like Jordan and Hope. When Raven had hinted at Anya that everyone had someone, she had been more than surprised when the tough warrior had gruffly offered to come. She knew the terrain, she had said. That's what she had said anyways to get Lexa to allow her to accompany them. Raven didn’t think the young Commander would have fought, not with the knowing smile she had when she granted her mentor’s request.   

“Don’t touch anything that looks important,” Nikki tells Jenna, sounding disgruntled. She pauses. “Just don’t touch anything.”   

Raven smirks. She glances at her former enemy turned friend. The blonde gives her a nod with the hint of a smile.   

“I won’t,” Jenna says, rocking on her heels. “Pinkie promise.”  

This time Nikki does smile. Raven looks at the redheaded teen quizzically. The people from the mountain had preserved the old world in many ways. Nikki was from the old world. Raven wonders why the people of the Ark didn’t; she figures it was the same reason the Grounders didn’t. Survival was more important than living .   

“Jenna, can you find Emori?” Raven asks, eyes glued on the screens again. “I need her to help me crunch these numbers. I do not want to go in blind.”  

“On it,” she says, scampering off.   

“I like that kid,” she hears Nikki say with a chuckle when she walks away. Raven smiles too, this time.   

****   

“Raven’s probably looking for me,” Emori says breathlessly. Murphy ignores her, stealing another kiss. “John.”  

“Door’s locked,” he shrugs.   

She huffs out a laugh. “Still will be ruined when she pounds on our door. We've been in bed far too long. She won’t be happy that you came along if you distract me from my work.”  

“So, I'm a good distraction, huh?”  

She smiles. Murphy decides her smile could light the whole world. “After we shut down the reactors, we’ll have six months of distractions to pass the time until we can leave whatever bunker we’re in.” Her face sobers. “You’re important. I learned from Raven; I'm needed with her. But you learned from Bellamy. You are just as important as me, just in a different way.”  

He looks at her as if she hung the moon and stars. “I love you.”   

“And I love you,” she smiles brightly again. “I’d rather spend this time with you no matter how short or long, than an eternity without you.”   

“Hey, that’s my line.”  

She shrugs. “I modified it a little.”   

They both jumped slightly when there was a knock on the metallic door. “Emori?” Jenna’s voice came from the other side. “Raven needs you.”   

Emori gives a him an I told you so look before climbing out of bed, reaching for her clothes. “I’ll be right there!”   

“At least she knows how to knock,” Murphy chuckles. Emori laughs.  

****  

It was a cool morning, a breeze making the remaining green on the trees wave. The ground was covered in brown and orange leaves and pine needles as the group made their way to Polis.   

Octavia felt alive as she sat on top of Helios. One hand held the reins, the other was lightly scratching the chestnut’s withers. He was happy, neck stretching down, licking and chewing. Lincoln rode beside her on his Friesian.   

“How are you feeling?” he asks her. She’s surprised, and grateful, this was the first time she’s been asked.   

“A little sore,” she admits. “I haven’t ridden in months. But really good. Really . I love riding Helios, much more than in the wagon or in the river.”   

“You’ve always adapted to the ways of the ground easier than others.”   

“I was born in the wrong place,” she says. It’s only half a joke. She thrived on the ground; she adopted their culture and language with ease. He knew their child would be one with nature.   

“You’re where you belong now.”   

She smiles at him and she feels at home.   

“You’re okay to stay on him?”   

“If I feel like I need to get off, I’ll let you know. I swear,” she says. “I won’t risk her.” She touches her protruding bump with the hand not holding the reins. “We’re more than halfway there.”   

Further up in the front of the caravan, Lexa and Clarke rode side by side.   

“When we get to Polis, we’ll be very busy. You’ll help your mother with Nightblood distribution. Indra will aide with setting the space up and explaining the process. I’ll have several meetings with the gathering Ambassadors. We will need to find a different Skaikru ambassador. You cannot be in the position anymore.”   

“It’ll be a conflict of interest,” Clarke agrees.   

“After the tensions of the Nightblood distribution lower, that’s when we will announce that we are to be bonded. We must be careful about our timing.”   

Clarke whole heartedly agrees. Loving her wasn’t weak but there were those who still had the mindset that love was weakness. If anyone wanted to stage a coup or attempt an assassination attempt, that would be the opening for that.   

“Kane would be a great Ambassador,” Clarke says.  

“He would,” Lexa agrees. “Octavia would have been the one most fit, but that’s not her.”  

Clarke glances back, to where she sees her best friend perched on top of her horse. “That’s not her.” Her eyes find Aden and Madi who are sitting in a wagon behind them with the rest of the Natblida children. The children were all deep in conversation, full of smiles and laughter. “They’re going to be okay, right?”  

“We all will be.” Lexa doesn’t promise it, she can’t. But Clarke knows they’ll do their damn best to keep their little family safe. “Praimfaya, then we get to live .”  

Chapter 56: The Fray Part 1

Notes:

I am so sorry it has taken so long to update. Life truly got in the way, and I had lost all motivation to work on this story. The chapter is short, but I am still not fully motivated (I've been working on this since the last time I updated) but here is what I have produced so you don't need to wait too long. Hopefully a rewatch of the show up until THAT scene in 3x07 will refresh my desire.

“It’s been really quiet here since they left,” Echo muses, leaning against a tree. She and Bellamy were on watch, but it appeared to be more for the citizens of TonDC’s peace of mind than anything. 

“It’s kind of nice,” Bellamy tells her. “A little lonely without all our friends, but still nice.” 

“I still worry.” 

He looks at her. He feels an ache—no matter how much time passed, she spent a lot of time on high alert, waiting for something to happen.  

Bellamy knows that he probably should worry, too. Things had been going in their favor lately; they couldn’t possibly be that lucky. But maybe they were; maybe their second chance didn’t need to be any harder than it was.  

He was wrong. He wished he wasn’t.  

Echo was swiftly letting her arrows fly and he barely registered the ringing noise created when he started pulling the trigger of his gun.  

Metal glittering in the sunlight, Echo’s sword glinting as it struck her opponents. It was almost a dance, bodies spinning and swords clashing and a gurgling sound as her sword pierced through her opponent's neck. The man’s head was nearly severed.  

Echo pants, eyes meeting Bellamy’s. They needed to warn the others. This was too calculated to be random. Someone sent them.  

“We need to—”  

Her words are cut off when a sword stabs through her from behind, slicing straight through her abdomen. Bellamy is moving swiftly, and he shoots, a bullet embedding in the wounded warrior's head. As the dead man fell, the sword was ripped from her abdomen, leaving an open entrance and exit wound. They should have checked to make sure they were all dead. He internally kicks himself as he observes Echo’s injury.  

“How bad?” Echo asks. Her voice is thick with pain as she slipped into her native tongue. 

“You’re talking, so I don’t think it hit anything vital.” He swallows; he’s not sure how accurate his statement is. “We need to get you to Jackson.”   

“Good plan,” she agrees breathlessly.  

He takes a few steps, leading her with him. She gasps, letting out a cry that shakes him to his core. He wasn’t used to hearing her in pain.  

“I can’t,” she chokes out, knees buckling. He catches her before she hits the ground.  “Bellamy, I can’t move.”   

“You have to,” he orders through gritted teeth.  

“Leave me here, go find Jackson.”   

“No way.”   

“Bellamy.”  

“What if more come? I can’t just—I won’t leave you here to die.”   

“That’s even more reason why you need to go. They need to be warned. I’ll only slow you down. Think about everyone at the village.”   

“I am,” he grunts. “I can carry you.”   

“Bellamy—”   

“You’re our best fighter. This is for the village.”   

“Liar,” she whispers. She doesn’t protest again and allows him to lift her up, one arm hooked below her shaky legs and one on her back, careful of her wound. She was steadily bleeding out, and it frightened him. Echo was tall, but she was light, and he was able to carry her easily through the woods. 

“Jackson!” he shouts as he emerges from the trees and runs into the village.  

“Bellamy?” Harper pops out of her tent at the sound of her distressed voice. Her brown eyes widen when she surveys the sight before her. “Echo!” She runs over to her friends. “What the hell happened?!” 

“We need Jackson,” he pants. She nods and she bolts, racing to where she had last seen the doctor. He looks at the group that begins to form. “We were ambushed! We need to be ready for more to come!” Several warriors were quick to move. 

“I’ve got her.” Bellamy eyes Roan, who had appeared before him, confusion and concern alike shining in his eyes. Bellamy shakes his head, holding her tighter. He doesn’t miss the way she groans in pain; neither does the Azgeda king. “You’re about to collapse. She’s safe with me.” 

Bellamy hesitates but carefully transfers her into the king’s strong arms. Roan swiftly heads towards the medical tent, Bellamy stumbling after him. The two headed into the tent where Jackson and Harper were waiting.  

“Here, lay her down.” Roan places her carefully on the bed and Jackson, with Nyko’s aid, begin to quickly assess her injuries.  

“What happened?” Harper asks again. She hadn’t heard his response when she had raced off to alert Jackson.  

“We were on watch on the East corner, and then they came out of nowhere. It wasn’t random. There were six of them, we took them out, but we didn’t...damn it, I'm so stupid . We didn’t make sure they were dead and one of them got up behind her and stabbed her. Is she—” panic rises in his chest when he realizes she stopped making any noise.  

Jackson looked up at him and gave Bellamy a look he never wanted to be on the receiving end of. “I’m sorry. We'll do our best but...” he trails off, at a loss for words.  

“I need the fastest horse to go warn Heda,” Roan says, his voice tight as he stormed out of the tent. 

*******************  

“Something feels wrong.”  

Clarke's eyebrows furrows at Lexa’s words and her blue eyes begin scanning the woods. “Like what?” 

“I don’t...” Lexa swallows. “It’s a feeling.” 

When she turned to look at the children behind them, Clarke knew it was more than just a feeling. Her eyes find Gustus’ and the Fosgona was quick to maneuver his horse beside his young Commander’s.  

“Talk to me, Heda.”  

“We aren’t alone. We're being watched,” she murmurs. When she looks beyond the children, she sees that she’s not the only one plagued with uneasiness. She sees Indra tense, jaw locked, eyes flickering constantly at her seken. Lincoln and Octavia also shared the tense look on their faces. Lincoln was ready to protect his lover.  

“Which side?” he asks.  

“I--both, maybe.”  

This sends alarm through both Gustus and Clarke. When Clarke peers at the kids, she sees that there are no longer smiles on their faces. Aden is high on alert, staring intensely at the woods. Madi mimics him.  

Before anyone can speak one more word, an axe catapults through the air. Aden ducks, narrowly avoiding being hit as Madi screams. Aden wasn’t hit; one of the other Natblida’s had blood cascading down his shoulder where the axe hit before embedding into the side of the cart.  

“Madi!” Clarke yells.  

It was a full brawl in moments, everything happening so quickly all at once. Clarke had stumbled off her spooked horse and ran over to the cart. Gustus' sword is clashing with warrior after warrior. Lexa meets Clarke at the cart, and they begin coaxing and pulling the children off the cart. They were all sitting ducks there. Indra’s sword impaled a warrior’s middle, and she yanks her weapon out with an angry grunt on the other side of the wagon, where the horses were dancing in place and whinnying anxiously. “Octavia!” Clarke yells, seeing the young warrior very obviously fighting the urge to engage; she stayed ready to protect herself—and her unborn child. Her head snapped when she heard her name, and she was quick to dash over to her friend. 

“Follow me,” Lexa commanded. Aden's hand instinctively held hers, feeling fear bubbling in his chest despite his age. Madi clung tightly to Clarke.  

“What’s happening?” Madi, the young part of her taking over her former thirteen-year-old mind. 

“I don’t know,” Clarke responded grimly.  

Lexa led the Natblidas into the woods, away from the fray. She turns to Clarke. “I need you and Octavia to get the children to safety,” she orders. 

“Come with us!” Madi cries, tears streaming down her face now. “Please don’t leave us!”  

Lexa swallowed, never feeling that her title was a curse as much as she was feeling now. “I need to protect my people,” she chokes out, voice strained. She kneels in front of Madi, putting her hands on her little shoulders. Clarke blinks back her own tears, a memory of “the duty to protect my people comes first” from long ago infiltrated her mind. “Do you understand, little one?”  

Madi nods, sniffling. She remembers a time when the burden fell on her too-young shoulders, a burden that left her leading dozens of warriors into a blood-soaked gorge where countless were previously slaughtered.   

“I’ll always be with you. Do you have your knife?” Madi nods, lifting the hem of her shirt to show the knife clipped to her belt. “Good. It will keep you safe.” She stands her careful Heda mask slipping into place. She looks at Clarke and Octavia. “Keep them safe.”  

“We will,” Octavia tells her firmly. Clarke nods.  

Lexa meets the young warrior’s eyes, silently pleading for her to watch out for Clarke as well. Octavia gives a subtle nod. The Commander watches as the two young women lead the group of children away before she takes a steadying breath.  

She turns, walks out from the tree line, and into the fray. 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 57: The Fray Part 2

Notes:

Comments help fuel my writing and help motivate me to write the next chapter!

Swords clashed, blood puddled on the path. The attack was harsh and brutal. Scars from different clans marred the facers of the assailants. And it was vitally clear who the target was. With the word of everyone becoming nightbloods to survive, everyone who had the desire to assassinate the young Commander had been plotting and they had taken their shot. 

Lexa ducked an attack, sword narrowly missing her head. “Heda!” Indra shouts and she spun, skillfully yet difficultly taking out the assailants on either side of her.  

She was tired.  

She was tiring.  

She didn’t have much left in her. And that was why she had sent off Clarke, Octavia, Madi and the rest of the Natblida children.  

Her sword clangs against a large warrior that towered over her. She struggles as he begins to bring her to her knees by brute strength. She has flashes of another time, a time where Roan used the very same move with her. But instead of a crowd chanting her name, now she was surrounded by horror and death and countless who were ready to kill her from all sides.  

She barely hears the nervous whinny. But she feels the hot blood splatter across her face when a sword beheads the warrior looming over her. King Roan reaches a hand down and grasps her hand, pulling her to her feet.  

“TonDC?” she asks, bracing herself for the news.  

“There was an attack. Only one...” he stops himself from saying casualty. He didn’t know if she was dead yet. “Just one was injured.” 

“Who--watch out!”  

They couldn’t finish their conversation as another wave of warriors came after them. 

******************************  

“I’m tired,” one of the youngest Natblidas, Melia, whined.  

“We need to keep going,” Aden pants.  

“Are we almost there, Nomon?” Madi asks.  

“I don’t know,” Clarke breathes. She didn’t even know if they were going the right direction at this point. All she knew was that they were in danger and they needed to get to Polis. She also knew Lexa was in grave danger. 

“Don’t think about it,” Octavia says tensely. Lincoln and Indra were risking their lives, too. They were also in grave danger. 

She touches her stomach and takes a pain filled breath. All the walking and the stress wasn’t good for her. What started as a stitch in her side had turned into intensifying pain. She didn’t tell Clarke about the pain, nor did she cry despite wanting to just curl up in a ditch. She kept walking, one foot in front of the other.  

“Look!” Aden points at a marker on a tree. “We are going to right way!”  

“We’re almost there,” Octavia breathes. “Right through the woods.”  

“Are the bad people going to get us before we get there?” Melia asks in a tiny voice.  

“We need to keep moving,” is all Clarke says. She can’t promise anything, but she doesn’t want to scare the kids. “Octavia? Are you okay?” 

“I will be once I'm there,” she pants. There are spots in her vision, but she pushes forward. She feels a hand in hers and she looks down at the little girl holding onto her. Melia looks up at her with big, scared hazel eyes. She uses the desire to protect the child to keep walking. Melia was even younger than Madi, the newest and youngest Natblida of the group that came from Polis.  

“Can you keep me safe?” Octavia whispers down to the little girl, attempting to empower her.  

Melia smiles with dimples and suddenly, she looked a little less afraid. “I’ll keep you safe.” 

“Mom, my legs are tired,” Madi complains.  

“I know, little one,” Clarke says, taking her hand. Aden and Lysa, the two oldest Natblidas, held the hands of the younger children. “Just a little longer.”  

The minutes felt like hours as they trekked, but before they knew it, they walked through the gates of Polis. Clarke let go of Madi’s hand and ran tiredly to a guard she recognized. He was fiercely loyal to Lexa.  

“Amos,” she breathed raggedly.  

The guard recognized her from a lifetime before, and he puts a hand on his sword. He sees the group of tired Natblidas, dirty and some sporting scratches. He calls out to the other guards. 

“What has happened?” he asks in her native tongue.  

She draws an unsteady breath, filling her wailing lungs. “There was an ambush. They’re after the Commander. She sent us for help. They attacked on the main road; we had just passed the big lake rock.”  

“Oakla, bring Clarke and Octavia kom Skaikru and the Natblidas inside the tower. Get them cleaned up and give them a place to rest,” he barks. He then charges off to the stables with a few other guards. Only some could ride to help, they had to leave protection for the capitol.  

Oakla looked no older than Clarke. She gave a small smile at the group before leading them into the tower. Madi looked around in complete awe; it looked very different now than it did after Praimfaya. They loaded into the elevator, and it brought them up, up, up. Up in the tower, before anyone could react, they were being ushered separately.  

“Mom!” Madi cried when a friendly looking guard tried to guide the Natblidas away.  

“It’s okay,” Aden assures her. “Masor is our guard. He takes care of us.” 

Madi ignored her older brother and ran over to Clarke. Clarke held her close. “Aden, Lysa, look after the others, alright?” 

“We will,” Aden promises, and Lysa nods solemnly.  

While the rest of the Natblidas were herded away to their room to be cleaned up and taken care of, Oakla and another led Clarke, Madi, Octavia, and little Melia who refused to release Octavia’s hand, to a room that was so familiar to Clarke. She surveyed it. This was where she stayed before, first when she was a hostage, and then when she willingly stayed as an ambassador. She stared at the bed, the very bed that in another life, Lexa had died in. 

“It’s a different time,” Octavia whispers. Clarke numbly nods.  

“I am Erie,” the other young maid said with a welcoming smile.  

“You’re Lexa’s handmaiden,” Clarke says, remembering her.  

“I am,” she smiles.  

“And who do we have here?” she peers at the children.  

“This is my daughter, Madi.” 

“Hello, Madi.” 

“Hi,” she says shyly.  

“This is Melia. She's the youngest Natblida,” Octavia says, her voice strained.  

“Octavia, are you okay?” Clarke asks, worry evident in her voice again. She silently shakes her head. “She’s pregnant,” she tells Oakla and Erie. “Our convoy was attacked, and we walked a long way.”  

Erie led her to the bed for a checkup, Melia still refusing to release her hand. Oakla led Clarke and Madi to the couch to sit. “You are all safe now.” 

*******************************  

The dead bodies littered the ground, both from the convoy and from the assailants. They had gotten them, every one of them. A few were captured alive for questioning.  

Roan looked at Amos and swallowed hard.  

“I should ride to TonDC to let them know of the losses we took.” 

Amos nodded, eyes forward. “Yes. I shall return to the capitol to inform them of the loss we have had.” 

Roan took a few steps before turning and grabbing the reins of a horse. The horse appeared uninjured. He led him over to Amos. He offered the reins to him. “Bring him back with you, his rider will be glad to see him. His name is Helios. He belongs to Octavis kom Skaikru.” 

Amos took the reins.  

Roan turned and walked towards his own horse, miraculously alive and unharmed. He climbed onto the horse and turned him towards TonDC. He was afraid of what he would find when he arrived.