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"The trails" is an unusual place, attractive to the eyes of University students in the area and, at the same time, a curious myth.
The way to get inside is, in fact, not that hard. New students can ask anyone at any club if they know about The Trails and people will easily point out the address for them.
Yet that’s the only easy thing about it, and Seokjin is an expert at fooling people into getting lost in there.
In his defense, there are warnings all over the place, many of them, actually, so the crowd waiting inside isn’t solely his responsibility.
Do not enter is written on the rusty plate at the old gate. That alone gives people a warning before they step in. If they walk past it, they do it at their own risk.
Prohibited access is written on a deformed plate on the floor. The old thing has already been damaged by countless people and their motorcycles stepping on it. Now it’s pretty much useless.
Seokjin frowns at it, stepping on it too as he walks in.
The young man follows the path confidently, with the cigarette stub between his lips.
His sinning lips, the same ones that were around something quite different a few minutes ago.
Seokjin keeps removing the filthy taste from his mouth, replacing it with the minty flavor of the cigarette.
"Hyung! Why aren't you waiting for me?" A playful voice screams on his back.
Seokjin stops walking as soon as he hears it. He stays still, feeling the cold breeze blowing his hair back, touching his forehead.
A younger man walks past him, turning around with inquisitive eyes when Seokjin doesn’t follow.
The forest is too dark tonight, moonlight barely caressing it. However, Seokjin has that man’s face engraved in his mind and soul, knowing exactly what sort of expression he is wearing in the dim lighting.
"I don't think we should arrive at the same time," Seokjin murmurs before the young man can ask him any questions. "Go first."
"Aren't you overreacting, hyung?"
Seokjin sighs. He isn’t going to explain his thoughts out loud, not to him at least. He already did it many times before, especially during the two years they spent dating, but it turns out it was a waste of time.
Jeon Jungkook never cared.
Seokjin is tired of trying to explain the obvious. Trying to explain how wrong this is, how fucked up it is for both of them to keep playing this dirty game.
Jungkook looks at him cluelessly like he doesn’t know what they were doing a few minutes ago inside that car, Jungkook’s boyfriend’s car.
"I said go.”
"Hyung–" Jungkook starts but Seokjin interrupts his cry with an abrupt and chaste kiss.
"Jungkook-ah, stop being a pain in my ass," his whisper caresses Jungkook’s humid lips, they smell like coconut. “Go away, I already told you twice.”
Jungkook still refuses, shaking his head, “Come with me.”
“I’ll be right behind you.”
“Hyung, I said come with me, now.”
Seokjin tongues his cheek, his patience has a limit.
"Why aren’t you listening to me tonight? You’ve been acting horribly." Seokjin grabs the back of Jungkook’s hair, pulling at the soft locks, raising his face closer.
Jungkook blinks, avoiding hyung's eyes “Because you deserve it,” he finally whispers. Seokjin grimaces at that, not understanding quite what he means. “You thought I wasn’t going to notice?”
“Notice what?”
Jungkook huffs, stepping aside. “The way you looked at him, the mint-haired dude, the–" Seokjin smirks at his words, finally understanding where this is coming from.
“Are you talking about the hot twink that arrived with Namjoon tonight? Is that what got you so worked up? That’s why you dragged me to Jimin’s car eager for my cock?”
Jungkook blushes at such a filthy question, at the way Seokjin whispers every word in that intimidating way of his.
Tonight Jungkook has been acting like a stupid little brat, and it makes Seokjin want to kneel and suck him off right in the middle of the desolate forest.
The younger man knows he has Seokjin wrapped around his finger but still gets jealous for the most foolish reasons.
“Don’t make a scene, Jungkook. Don't be ridiculous.”
“Stop looking at him, then. You have me, you don’t need him to get your dick wet.”
I don’t have you. Seokjin wants to say but keeps his lips sealed before his thought escapes. He sighs instead, locking his eyes with Jungkook’s, raising one of his hands to rub the younger man’s chin with his thumb.
“You are cute.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, ignoring him. “The guy is here with his boyfriend, you should leave him alone,” Seokjin blinks, speechless at his words.
Is Jungkook joking?
“Namjoon fucked my boyfriend too, didn’t he?” Seokjin asks with a tiny glimpse of irony in his voice. “Maybe that’s what we do, we share things,” Jungkook inhales sharply at Seokjin's words.
“Now go away,” Seokjin orders in a dry whisper, smacking Jungkook’s ass.
“Hyung–”
“Good luck tonight, I’ll try to talk to you later, but if I don’t, remember I’ll be watching you so don’t do anything stupid.”
Jungkook sighs “Just come soon, the race is about to start. I want you to be there.”
“I’ll be there, I promise.”
Min Yoongi never imagined his Saturday night was going to be filled with this sort of event, he thought he had left all this in the past, in Daegu, but maybe not, maybe moving to Seoul was even worse.
He grabs the package of menthol cigarettes from the tail bag on his friend’s Ducati, checking the number of cigarettes left inside. Just three, fuck.
He checks the time, it’s still early, at least thirty minutes before the first race. “Namjoon-ah, I’ll go to my car for a sec, I forgot my cigarettes”
“Hyung, I have a brand new package here,” Yoongi makes a face, which only makes Namjoon roll his eyes, “You are so picky, the menthol ones aren’t even that good.”
“I like them, and I’m the one smoking them, so it’s not your business.”
“Whatever, come back soon. I’ll be there with the guys.”
Yoongi nods, “Okay.”
This is Yoongi’s first time in The Trails, so he gets a bit lost when he walks through the forest. He follows the path to the entrance, at least he still remembers what the gate looked like.
At some point, he turns on the flashlight in his phone, illuminating the quiet and dark place. It’s quite scary, honestly.
He finally gets to the entrance after a couple of minutes of walking, being welcomed by the damaged fence and the strong smell of a joint. He walks past the smell in silence, holding his breath, ignoring how a group of guys whistle at him when he walks past them.
Yoongi knows his hair catches people’s attention, and as a person that likes to be invisible, it annoys him to feel people staring at him.
Damn Kim Taehyung for making him dye his hair mint—although it’s his own fault for losing the stupid bet in the first place.
He spots his car a few meters away, sighing at it. “There you are,” he pats his car, his baby, a fancy Audi he bought last year. “I was looking for you,” he murmurs, opening one of the doors. His eyes find the package of cigarettes quickly, putting them inside his jacket pocket along with an extra lighter.
The walk back to The Trails it’s silent again, his feet crash against the dried leaves, cracking them under his weight. This time, though, the moon illuminates his path. He walks with his head leaned back, eyes lost in the bright sphere in the sky.
The noise coming from The Trails sounds muffled by the trees dancing with the breeze, and it’s oddly peaceful, he would stay there for a while if he had the chance.
Maybe he can come back alone next time, one of the nights The Trails aren’t being used for illegal motorcycle races and alcoholic parties.
“Go away,” Yoongi hears from afar, stopping walking, discovering he isn’t as alone as he thought.
His eyes fall on two guys, closely talking, maybe doing a bit more than just talking. They are a few meters away from Yoongi so he can’t be seen, but it doesn’t mean Yoongi can just disappear.
Yoongi narrows his eyes at them, not seeing much more than two shadows, wondering what to do now. He doesn’t want to spy on them, but if he walks, the leaves on the floor will crack under his feet again and they will find him staring, and now they are kissing so that would be awkward.
He decides to stay still, looking back up at the moon, patiently waiting for them to finish whatever thing they have going on.
One of them walks away first, leaving the other behind, Yoongi can’t see more than his back, but that’s enough to describe him. The guy is wide, as big as Namjoon, maybe a bit broader. His jacket says Kore, it's pretty odd. His hair catches Yoongi’s attention; it’s long at the back, but not too long, just enough to be moved by the cold wind.
The guy remains still for a while, looking up at the moon the same pensive way Yoongi did a few seconds ago. Yoongi isn’t a fortune teller nor does he have telepathic powers, but he knows something’s off between them.
Or maybe Yoongi is just too sensitive after leaving Taehyung in Daegu, still missing his silly smile and dumb ideas that somehow turned out to be brilliant. He misses every single little aspect of Taehyung’s character, every kiss, and every caress.
And the guy seems slightly troubled too, maybe because of the other guy that just left his side. Yoongi can’t tell with clarity yet, but recently he has such talent to attract broken hearts that maybe he isn’t far from the truth.
As Yoongi distracts himself with his memories, he doesn’t notice when the guy disappears. Next time Yoongi looks in his direction there’s no one, and that’s his cue to walk back too, he doesn’t want Namjoon losing his mind.
Seokjin is not a big fan of being the center of attention, but he does notice how whenever he arrives in a place, people turn around only to look at him.
Tonight is not an exception. As soon as he appears from the forest, people’s eyes find him like they are attracted to him by a magnetic force.
Perhaps it’s the fact that if Seokjin is there, it means the real deal is about to start.
The young man ignores the curious eyes and searches for his group of friends in the ocean of leather jackets. People chat around him, minding their business, or at least acting like they are minding their business, despite their eyes falling back on Seokjin over and over again.
Seokjin hates it. He is not a celebrity for god’s sake. Well, kind of. Being his father’s son, and the brother of a man like Seokjung has brought some pressure into his life. He hates it. He dislikes the way strangers look at him with curiosity and expectation. God, he really detests their expectations.
“Oh! Sorry,” a boy mumbles when he bumps against Seokjin’s back, surprising him, almost making both of them fall. Seokjin holds tightly on someone’s motorcycle, taken off guard. “Sorry, I didn’t see you.”
Seokjin turns around, confused. His eyes land on his mint hair first, recognizing it instantly.
It's the boy he saw earlier, sitting on Namjoon's Ducati.
Seokjin doesn’t say a thing, making the boy look up at him, confused at the lack of response. He finds Seokjin's eyes already focused on him. “You didn’t see me?” Seokjin asks in a dry and sharp whisper. “How is that possible? Couldn’t you make a better excuse? Come on.”
The boy gapes in vain as no words come out of his mouth.
Seokjin can tell the guy is offended, maybe a bit startled, but Seokjin doesn’t care, because that’s exactly the point.
The guy bumped into him, Namjoon’s boyfriend bumped into him. This opportunity seems ridiculously perfect.
“It was just an accident,” the guy finally says. Seokjin knows that, he knows it wasn’t on purpose, but the guy did it regardless, and that’s what matters.
Before Seokjin can say something bitter, a firm hand squeezes his shoulder. “Be careful, Jin hyung,” a man warns near his ear. There is a shade of a threat in there, almost hidden, Seokjin can detect it easily because he knows Kim Namjoon way too well.
He takes Namjoon’s hand off his shoulder with ease, turning around to face him. “Not my fault that your new toy can’t see who’s standing before his eyes."
"How dare you call him–"
"Namjoon-ah, it was my fault," the mint-haired boy interrupts, moving closer to Namjoon's side. "Didn't you say the race was starting soon? Let's go, I got my cigarettes already."
Seokjin scowls at the way the guy takes Namjoon by his arm and tries to drag him away, trying to ruin the perfect opportunity of a punch on Namjoon's jaw, or at least a good discussion.
"Hey!" Seokjin calls sharply. Both Namjoon and his company turn around. There are people around them still looking at him, so Seokjin lowers his voice before the whole place finds out the two main racers are arguing. "What's your name?" He asks the stranger.
Namjoon snorts, stepping before the shorter guy, trying to hide him "His name's–"
"I didn't ask you, did I?" Namjoon scoffs but has the decency to keep his mouth shut this time, so Seokjin's attention rapidly returns to the mint-haired guy, "So? Do you have a name? Or a voice? Or should I talk with Namjoon only?" To Seokjin’s annoyance, the mint-haired guy remains silent. “God, Namjoon-ah, what a useless doll you brought this time.”
The shorter man laughs, shaking his head in disbelief. "Is it mandatory to give you my name? Is this a rule I didn’t know? Are you the fucking president to demand things from me?"
Seokjin smiles and shrugs, satisfied by his reaction. This is exactly what he wanted. "I would be surprised if anyone here respected the fucking president,” he murmurs using the same ironic tone. “I’m not the president, but I’m the owner of this place. You are standing in my yard right now, and that gives me enough right to ask you your name.”
Namjoon rolls his eyes. It always bothered him when Seokjin bragged, especially when it was true.
“I see. Rich guys are naturally irritating. Do you always act so entitled? Like you are the center of the universe?” Yoongi asks with a bitter laugh.
“I don’t know, but now that you mention it, I think Namjoon represents that stereotype very well.”
Namjoon raises one sharp brow when his name is called. "Wow, you really hold a grudge for a long time, don't you? How long has it been already? Half a year?"
"You really wanna talk about that now?"
Namjoon shrugs, "I don't know, should we finally talk about that now?” He asks ironically, “Wait, I think the real question is are you prepared to talk about that now? Looking at you, I don’t think so.”
Seokjin hates the cocky smile on his face, that fucking dimple making him look so gentle when he is not. He hates how Namjoon still dares to taunt him after all the damage he caused.
Namjoon breathes in and adds with a tired tone “Listen, if it makes you feel better, he wasn’t even that good.”
“He wasn’t that good?” Seokjin repeats in a heartbeat, walking closer to Namjoon. The latter is slightly taller, but Seokjin’s anger can’t be compared to Namjoon’s, and that’s what makes him more threatening.
Much to Seokjin’s surprise and annoyance, two hands stop him from stepping closer.
“Yoongi, my name’s Yoongi,” the mint-haired guy interrupts, stepping in between the two of them. His hands are firmly pressing Seokjin’s chest over the leather jacket, while the latter looks down at him, blinking confusedly. “My name’s Yoongi,” he repeats once again.
Seokjin looks into his eyes for the split of a second, and somehow it’s enough time for Yoongi’s cat-shaped eyes to be carved in his mind. He snaps out of the trance before his stupid brain falls for those pretty weapons, taking Yoongi’s hands in his own with a wicked idea.
"Namjoon-ah, would it be so bad if I just… reciprocated your sweet actions? I can give you my verdict later, see if he isn’t that good either," Seokjin whispers, flicking his gaze between Namjoon and a confused Yoongi who doesn’t understand what he means.
And that seems to be a violent button to press because Namjoon harshly pulls Yoongi away from his hold, getting him behind his back. "Stay away from him, asshole."
Seokjin shakes his head, "This is your fault, you shouldn't have brought him here and you know it. But you are lucky, Namjoon-ah. You’re lucky because he isn’t my type,” his eyes fall on Yoongi again, who’s frowning at him. “No offense.”
Yoongi scoffs, "What the hell are you two talking about?"
Seokjin laughs, ignorance looks pure in his eyes, attractive even. “No–” a gunshot echoes to their ears, then, taking Seokjin by surprise. What time is it?
The noise wasn’t from a real gun, just a flare gun, but it was loud enough to indicate the race has just begun.
Fuck, Jungkook.
Seokjin turns around trying to catch a glimpse of the speedway but can't see anything, there are too many people screaming in excitement, hanging over the dusty barricade.
Namjoon laughs ironically. “Well, well, well, I see you’re still sucking his dick, aren’t you?"
Seokjin turns around sharply "Do you really want me to punch you tonight?"
"Can you two stop?" Yoongi intervenes then, once again. He pulls Namjoon closer to him, away from Seokjin. "I don't know what this is about, but I didn't come here tonight to see you fighting, Namjoon-ah, so let's go watch the fucking race or take me back to the dorms asap."
Seokjin blinks at the sudden outburst from the shorter one, his voice is sharp and strict. He frowns when Namjoon bites his tongue and swallows whatever bullshit he was about to say.
Look at you Namjoon-ah, you’re fucking whipped for his ass.
Seokjin smirks when Yoongi finally succeeds at taking Namjoon with him, leaving Seokjin behind by himself. This time he doesn’t stop them, he doesn’t have time to keep arguing, Jungkook might go into the second lap at any second and he has to be there.
He quickly walks to the opposite side, finding Jaehwan’s face looking at him, grinning with mocking irony when they lock eyes.
“Look who decided to come back, I guess you were having fun,” Jaehwan murmurs, welcoming him again, offering him a beer. “First Jungkook, now that new brat. Seriously, did you come here to play tonight or what?”
Seokjin’s face scrunches, “Stop acting like a jealous boyfriend. I swear, it doesn’t suit you at all.”
Jaehwan snorts, rolling his eyes “I’m not your boyfriend, but I’m your manager.”
“You are not such a thing,” Jaehwan only laughs in response.
“Are you ready? You are in the next one.”
Seokjin nods as he downs half the beer at once. “Do you have the bets ready?”
“Yes, I tried to make up for… you know… the last round,” Jaehwan’s whiny tone doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Stop being greedy and just be thankful. I’m the one that makes you rich every weekend, I’m the one that does the hard job too, so calm your ass down before I fire you as my, so-called, manager.”
Jaehwan laughs again. "Jin-ah, we have a full house tonight. You could have made us richer but you decided to act dumb."
"Exactly, we have a full house, that's why my plan it's better than average money."
Jaehwan narrows his eyes, "Is it?” Seokjin nods, decisive. Jaehwan only sighs deeply in return. “Just avoid getting into a fight, police officers are patrolling near The Trails and near our dorms tonight, we don't need a fuss."
Seokjin knows it better than anyone else. There have been countless fights in this place, none of them involving Seokjin, but they were big enough to get the police involved, obligating all the people in there to escape the best way they could.
Seokjin doesn't need that chaos tonight, and that's why he has planned his actions carefully.
Jaehwan narrows his eyes, "Are you sure about...?"
"Yes, I'm sure, and don't worry, Namjoon can get very stupid when you press the right buttons. Besides, his pride and ego are bigger than his loyalty," Jaehwan nods, grabbing a cigarette, making Seokjin scrunch his face in disgust. If it's not his favorite menthol brand, then he hates them. He is picky like that.
"Do you like the guy?"
Seokjin snorts at that. Like? No, this is not about liking, this is about revenge, and Seokjin is ready for it. "That's the last thing you should worry about."
"Is this about Jungkook, then? Are you still wasting your time because of him?"
"Jae, I like you, you know that. We are good friends.”
Jaehwan chuckles. “But?”
“But this whole thing is none of your business, so let me live my life the way I want it.”
“Believe me, I don’t care how you live your life, I just care when it affects my pocket money.”
Seokjin smirks, squeezing his friend’s shoulder. “Maybe you should consider getting a real job and stop making a living out of me.” He pats Jaehwan’s back as he walks past him to greet the rest of their friends.
“Is it true?” Yoongi asks from his spot on the bench. Everyone around them is screaming, cheering on their favorite racers.
“What?” Namjoon asks, distracted.
“What the guy said, that he is the owner of this place?”
Namjoon sighs, “His name is Kim Seokjin, his father is Kim Raejung.”
Yoongi’s eyes get wider. “Kim Raejung? Are you for real?”
“He bought this place years ago, he used to participate in illegal street races when he was younger.”
“I thought it was a myth.”
“It’s a ‘myth’ because it’s illegal, but what happens here it’s well known by everyone, that’s why police officers stay near the place or the dorms. Our university’s renowned for this shit.”
“I know, it’s one of the main reasons you moved from Daegu to study here.”
Namjoon chuckles, “Hyung, that’s not true,” His words are in vain because Yoongi knows it is true. “Anyway, Kim Raejung bought the famous trails when he got older. Kim Seokjung was the first one to follow his father’s steps but now that he is competing professionally Seokjin it’s the one in charge.”
Yoongi hums, processing the unexpected information. “Well, I bet he… he must feel incredibly pressured by the weight of his name,” The way his voice becomes smaller shows how much he relates to that feeling. Namjoon shoots him a short glance.
Yoongi has always lived under constant pressure himself, but this wasn’t the moment to dig further into it. This wasn’t the correct place to feel or look vulnerable.
Namjoon clicks his tongue, “Don’t feel sorry for him, he’s an ass,” Yoongi laughs.
Seokjin didn't sound like an ass, he sounded incredibly hurt. Yoongi doesn't know him, but he can see people's feelings through their eyes, and the few seconds he stared at Seokjin, he saw raw anger dilating his pupils. Anger caused by Namjoon, for sure.
“You were an ass too. What the hell was all that about?”
Namjoon shrugs, grabbing a cigarette. “I don’t want to talk about it, it’s not important.”
“It seemed important for him.”
Namjoon frowns, bumping Yoongi’s arm playfully, “Are you on his side or mine?”
“No one’s side until you tell me what you did to him. He was about to kick your ass, Namjoon-ah.”
Namjoon groans, finally sitting next to him. “It’s an old story. I accept that I was wrong, but I’m not the only one to blame.”
“Okay,”
“And Seokjin hyung keeps hating me, only me,” Namjoon continues ignoring Yoongi. “It’s unfair, I don’t deserve that treatment, we used to be friends.”
“Okay,” Yoongi repeats, but Namjoon ignores him again.
“I wish he wasn’t like that, but I know him, and he will never forgive me. He just won’t. He needs to blame someone, and I guess it’s easier to blame me.”
Yoongi narrows his eyes suspiciously, crossing his arms and leaning back on the bench. “Well... if you did something wrong, even if you weren’t the only one, I hope you apologized for it.”
“I’ve tried.”
Yoongi rolls his eyes, “Have you?”
“Hyung, the question offends me.”
Yoongi snorts, squeezing his shoulder. “All I have to say is that people’s hearts deserve to heal, and it’s hard to do so when chapters aren’t closed.”
“Closing that chapter is not up to me.”
Yoongi sighs, “Are you sure about that?”
“You saw him, you heard him. He hates me.”
Yoongi hums, without knowing what happened, he can't help his dear friend.
Namjoon doesn’t talk after it, and Yoongi doesn't pressure him any harder. Maybe their time to heal hasn’t come yet, but knowing Namjoon, the older man knows that time will come and things will be alright again.
When Jungkook wins it’s not a surprise for anyone, he was the favorite. The crowd screams at him, throwing beer in the starting grid direction.
Jungkook likes this, it’s evident in his eyes, he removes the face shield showing his sweet smile to the people cheering on him. His eyes search for something, and Seokjin wants to believe he is searching for him, but the reality is, he might be looking for his boyfriend.
It tastes bitter, but it’s alright, time changes.
A blond head appears in the middle of the crowd, Seokjin swallows a knot when he sees the guy jumping in Jungkook's arms, taking off his helmet, kissing him.
“Where’s my baby?” Seokjin asks, distracted.
Jaehwan stares at him in silence before answering, “Woonie brought it, it’s ready for you.”
Seokjin walks away from his friend, grabbing his spotless Yamaha, sitting on it as curious eyes stare at him.
He doesn’t like to be the center of attention, at all, that's true. Yet he accepts it tonight, because he knows he will win, and people will watch him do so.
He enters the dark speedway with cheers ringing in his ears. He ignores the people growling at him in excitement, all of them mostly drunk.
During races, Seokjin never distracts his mind from the main goal, that’s why he never stares around the crowd and only focuses his eyes on the speedway.
However, tonight a foreign force guides his head to the side, trying to find Jungkook’s face somewhere in there.
He doesn’t find Jungkook, but his eyes land on someone else, refusing to move to the rest of the crowd.
The mint-haired guy is not looking back at him at all, too busy with something on his phone.
It’s funny, he stands out the most in the barricade, the people around him are suddenly blurred as if Seokjin was under a spell. Is it the mint hair? Maybe it is.
Seokjin hates to admit it, but Namjoon has good taste in cute-looking guys, and what’s worse, Seokjin's taste is pretty similar.
Fuck.
He adjusts his helmet, with the face shield hiding his eyes, letting him explore more. No one knows the way he stares at Yoongi’s hands, or how his eyes stop on his pouty lips, or his button nose as he scrunches it.
He is cute.
Namjoon’s motorcycle growls next to him, bringing Seokjin’s attention back to their present. He makes his motorcycle growl just as loud, making Namjoon's head turn in his direction.
There are more guys in line, guys Seokjin has been competing against for a long time. None of them are real rivals, thinking of them as such is an insult.
They are nothing but a bunch of rich dudes that lose money like it’s their hobby.
Seokjin returns his eyes to the speedway, trying to focus on what matters.
And just like that, the energy shifts.
It's easy to know when the race it's about to start. The air shifts into something denser and thicker. The smell of gasoline blossoms, bitter and heavy.
And then, the flare gun shoots up to the sky, and Seokjin's mind can only focus on one thing: winning.
Beating Seokjin has never been an easy task, and maybe it's because Seokjin has never focused on beating anyone else but himself. His concentration always stays in his previous records, in his past mistakes, in his way to improve.
His mind focuses on the wind, on the number of laps, on the edgy curves in the circuit. He never looks at who's next to him, or who's about to surpass him, or who's greedier than him to do irresponsible tricks that can cause stupid damage.
Seokjin knows very well that the only way to be better than the rest is to keep his performance under control, focusing on his path and making his hard work speak for itself.
He finishes the first lap in the lead, feeling the vibration of the motorcycle getting inside his body like they are one.
Right at this moment, he feels complete, he feels like he is the only person in the entire universe. Only him and his motorcycle exist, and it’s truly perfect.
Seokjin is the owner of the world.
But magical moments don’t last much, that’s what makes them special, so Seokjin isn’t surprised when he spots the flag rising at the last lap, focusing his eyes on it until he suddenly surpasses it.
Seokjin knows he's first but doesn’t care about the result. Instead, he focuses on the glorious feeling of the adrenaline releasing the tense pressure in his shoulders until it finally disappears, leaving Seokjin levitating for a few seconds.
Quickly, he drives back to the starting grid, being welcomed by loud drunk people, but Seokjin doesn't acknowledge any of them.
People usually know him for being "cool" when he wins, constantly showing no reaction. But Seokjin doesn't act like this because he is cool, he is just an introvert that can be loud but only with the right people, and they are not the right people, so Seokjin ignores them. As simple as that.
Jaehwan takes off his helmet, smiling proudly at his friend. "You did well, do you want a beer?"
Seokjin shakes his head, “Just water.”
“Don't say anything,” Namjoon burst out dryly, taking off his helmet.
He is walking back to the parking lot after losing his second –and final– competition.
Yoongi is waiting for him on a bench, smiling at him, trying to show some comfort.
“Do you think he did it on purpose?” Namjoon asks, his voice covered in evident frustration.
“Did it on purpose? What do you mean?”
“Almost losing just to beat my ass at the end,” Namjoon explains like it wasn’t obvious.
Yoongi hums, recalling the way the Kore jacket guy almost slipped in the first lap losing all the advantage he had. He didn’t do it on purpose, he was on the verge of losing the whole thing, Yoongi is convinced of it. The only reason he still won was Namjoon’s own mistakes trying to keep the lead.
“Namjoon-ah, next time focus on your timing, focus only on yourself, and don’t look back every couple of seconds to check how close he is, okay?” Namjoon groans in response. “Don’t be too harsh on yourself, Joonie, you did well, you almost won.”
“Exactly, I almost won, almost!”
Yoongi chuckles at his little explosion of temper, squeezing his shoulder in support. “Relax, it’s not a big deal–”
“Kim Namjoon!” A new voice screams from the back, startling both Yoongi and Namjoon. “You almost beat me,” Seokjin’s voice sounds firm and annoyed, now catching strangers’ attention too. “I thought I was going to lose.”
“You almost did,” Namjoon replies instantly, standing up with a raised chin.
Seokjin nods, walking arms crossed in their direction. Yoongi can’t avoid looking up at him, trying to read his intentions in those sharp eyes.
Luckily, their eyes don’t meet this time, Yoongi doesn’t wait for it to happen, he quickly flicks his gaze back to Namjoon, keeping himself in a safe zone.
The thing about Seokjin is that he is quite intimidating and too attractive for his own good. Yoongi is not petty enough to deny his beauty. However, the guys that look that good, especially when they know they look that good, are usually a threat.
They are a fatal combination of ego and narcissism, paired with a glimpse of irony in their sour humor, and all that packaged in one detestable but equally desirable body.
It’s an addictive combination.
Seokjin doesn’t seem to be an exception to the rule, so it's easy to dislike him. Yoongi does dislike him, but his eyes are drawn back to Seokjin’s nonetheless, even against his own will.
Seokjin’s beauty is, surely, his number one weapon.
“You know very well that I don’t like the feeling of almost losing, or almost winning,” Seokjin says once he is closer. People’s eyes fall on them, already expecting something to happen, something that Yoongi doesn’t like one bit. “I don't like winning by accident.”
Namjoon narrows his eyes “Just tell me what the hell you want.”
“Another round, the last one.”
As soon as the words roll off his tongue, numerous whispers reach their ears. Yoongi looks around, finding those strangers’ faces staring at them with incredulity.
“Now?” Namjoon asks, surprised.
“Yeah. Oh, sorry. Did you have anything better to do?” He asks ironically, with his eyes flicking to Namjoon’s company’s direction. Yoongi frowns at him, not liking his tone. “We can make another bet to make it more exciting.”
“Nothing is exciting about money,” Namjoon replies unimpressed.
“I wasn’t talking about money.”
Yoongi crosses his arms, sighing through his nose. He can practically read Seokjin’s mischievous intentions, so he grabs his friend’s hand, pulling him closer. “Namjoon-ah, let’s go home. I’m tired,” Seokjin’s threatening eyes fall on their hold, then back up to Yoongi’s eyes.
Yoongi doesn't shy away this time.
“What do you want to bet then?” Namjoon asks instead, taking both Yoongi and Seokjin by surprise. The older guy looks oddly proud of himself.
Meanwhile, Yoongi sighs, shaking his head in disapproval, he looks ready to protest.
Seokjin points at his Yamaha then, resting a few meters away from them. The crowd gasps in absolute disbelief.
“Hyung–” a new voice calls. Everyone’s eyes land on the owner, including Yoongi’s. It’s a young guy with big round eyes. His face looks so harmless, so innocent. Yoongi recognizes him immediately. “Hyung you can’t do that, that's your bike.”
Yoongi knows he has seen the guy before, one time, in the forest, kissing Seokjin.
“Jungkook, this is none of your business,” Seokjin says gently. He doesn’t sound like the same brutal person anymore. Is that his boyfriend? Does he have the power to put Seokjin under a spell? “Go back with Jimin, everything’s fine.”
Jungkook shakes his head, stubbornly. “Hyung, you won, you don’t have to do this. You kicked his ass because you are better than him. One more round won't change anything.”
Namjoon exhales sharply, catching Yoongi’s attention, “Didn’t you hear your hyung? He told you to go away with your boyfriend. Don’t get involved.”
Yoongi frowns now, more confused than before.
So, the so-called Jungkook is not Seokjin’s boyfriend? But they were making out, he thinks, trying to understand.
Yoongi suddenly gasps when the puzzle pieces fall in the right place.
They were hiding, he whispers to himself as the recognition sinks in. An involuntary and nervous chuckle makes it out of his mouth.
“What’s so funny?” Seokjin asks, his brows pinch together.
The mint-haired man shakes his head, feeling called out.
“Nothing. I guess– I guess I’m just tired,” Yoongi mumbles, not expecting Seokjin’s eyes to be on him when he looks in his direction.
Seokjin hums “Are you?” Yoongi nods, not knowing what else to do, “Well, I can take you home if you want.”
And Yoongi only blinks, now he really doesn't know what to do.
Seokjin, satisfied with himself, focuses on Namjoon again, “Namjoon-ah, if you win, you can take my baby,” A thousand of whats and hows echo from the crowd around them. “You know how important that motorcycle is to me,” he adds, trying to persuade him.
Namjoon narrows his eyes, “And if you win?” he asks, curious.
“If I win?” Seokjin asks with a playful grin, “If I win, I’ll take him with me tonight,” Seokjin answers, pointing at Yoongi with his eyes.
“What?” all three men whisper at once.
Namjoon doesn’t move from his spot, staring in both disbelief and astonishment. He looks so confused.
Jungkook’s lips become a firm line, looking up at Seokjin with pleading eyes, silently asking him not to do this.
But then there's Yoongi. He is the only one whose expression hasn’t changed at all. He saw it coming.
Just as he suspected. Seokjin is a jerk, and Namjoon is a fool for falling right into his trap.
“So? What do you say? Is this more exciting than money?”
Namjoon shakes his head, ready to refuse Seokjin’s offer. However, his words are cut short by the crowd, encouraging Namjoon to accept the deal.
Yoongi can’t believe he is seeing doubt in his eyes. Would his friend bet him in a stupid race? Is he fucking serious?
“Kim Namjoon,” Yoongi calls out sharply.
Namjoon sighs, looking down at him. Yoongi knows he wants to say no, he isn’t such a heartless guy. Seokjin also knows that Namjoon would have said no already if they were alone.
Unfortunately, this stupid conversation is taking place in the middle of the parking, with lots of people cornering Namjoon to say yes, to accept the damn deal.
Yoongi looks up at Seokjin, who’s already staring at him with those alluring, and condescending eyes, knowing his plan succeeded.
Yoongi shakes his head, pinching the tip of his nose, already defeated. He refuses to look up, refuses to look at the whole crowd celebrating as Namjoon says yes.
Yoongi is so furious at that moment that he can barely keep it together.
“I hope you are happy,” Yoongi murmurs bitterly to no one in particular, but Seokjin knows he is talking to him.
Both of them walk rather closer now that the crowd is moving back to the barricade.
“I’m half happy, I’ll be happier once I take you home with me.”
Yoongi fakes a laugh, “You said I wasn’t your type yet you seem devoted to taking me home with you. Weird, isn’t it?”
Seokjin yawns, unimpressed, but there's a mischievous smirk somewhere hidden in his lips.
Yoongi deeply hates how dangerously attractive his smile is, paired with those half-dimples at the edge of his mouth.
“I hope Namjoon wins,” Yoongi bites back.
“He is not good enough to win, and you know it. That’s why you look so pathetically defeated already.”
Yoongi purses his lips in silence. He has had enough.
He looks around, checking the uninterested crowd surrounding them, and when the right moment comes, he pulls Seokjin into the forest, hiding them from curious eyes.
The movement gets Seokjin off guard. He doesn't have time to react before Yoongi is pressing him against a tree.
“Look, I’m not a fucking toy for you to play around with, so this is the last time I let you do this bullshit to me. I don’t care who you are, I will still kick your ass. Do you get it?”
Seokjin’s expression shifts into a wicked smile. He raises his chin in defense but doesn’t push Yoongi away. “I knew it was suspicious the way you accepted everything in silence, so submissive. You are not that naive after all, are you?”
“Shut the fuck up, you don’t know shit about me–”
“That filthy mouth of yours. I hate it,” Seokjin breathes out as he shifts their positions, easily straddling Yoongi against the tree, trapping his thigh between his, stopping Yoongi from moving. “You are wrong, though. I know you well enough. I can see you are as stupid as me–”
“Stupid?”
“Yes, otherwise you wouldn’t have accepted the way Namjoon traded you for a fucking vehicle, you would have stood up for yourself, but your filthy mouth remained silent. You're a joke.”
Yoongi frowns. He isn't stupid, nor a joke. He only accepted it because of Namjoon and what he means to him. He is Taehyung's brother for god's sake.
“But don’t worry, as you said, you are not my type, you are just my perfect opportunity and I’m not going to waste it.”
For a split second, Yoongi thinks he is going to be kissed. But no, Seokjin just comes closer to his ear and whispers, “Don’t be scared, I won’t do anything to you. I’m not like Namjoon after all,” And then he pulls apart rapidly as if touching Yoongi burns him alive.
Seokjin quickly disappears into the parking lot, not looking back once.
Meanwhile, Yoongi stares at the darkness of the forest, still confused about what just happened, and preparing himself for what's coming next.
Yoongi never expected his night to be filled with odd events like these, ending with him standing alone in a strange street waiting for a stranger to take him to an unknown place.
He purposely wants to ignore the fact that all of this is happening because his friend just traded him for a fancy motorcycle. That's so depressing.
He stares around in the loneliness of the empty street, leaning on his car, contemplating the attractive idea of getting in and driving away.
Fuck you, Seokjin. Fuck you, Namjoon.
But he can’t. Yoongi just got to Seoul, the last thing he needs right now is to gain popularity for being a coward.
Besides, race bets seem to be a huge deal in this elite community, he doesn't want his name involved in some shitty situation –more involved than he already is.
It doesn't take long before the growl of a motorcycle startles Yoongi, making him turn around, finding Seokjin’s outstanding Yamaha approaching him.
The heavy lights in the middle of the darkness blind Yoongi completely, but when his eyes are opened again, Seokjin is already next to him.
“Were you trying to run away?” Seokjin asks, turning off the loud motor.
Yoongi huffs, baffled, “Do I look like I was running away?”
“You look like you want to rip my head open.”
“Not that far from the truth.”
Seokjin chuckles, shaking his head. “Is that car yours?” He asks instead, Yoongi nods. “I see. What did you just say about rich guys? Does it apply to you as well?”
There is his cocky smile again, the one Yoongi wants to get rid of.
“Talking about my car, if you think I will leave it in this gross street and go home in that thing with you, then you are fucking crazy.”
Seokjin laughs at his words. It’s the first time Yoongi sees him laughing like something is actually funny for him, allowing himself to stop wearing that narcissist mask.
He looks a bit more handsome when he laughs freely, which doesn't help Yoongi’s situation at all.
“Just get on. You should be thankful I’m willing to drive you, no one beside me is allowed to ride my baby. You are just a very tiny exception.”
Yoongi rolls his eyes. Does Seokjin want to play that game? Good then. “No one can ride your bike?”
“No, no one.”
“Not even that guy?”
“That guy?” Seokjin repeats with a raised brow.
“The cute eyes guy. I wonder what would he think if he saw me riding your–”
“What do you even know about him?” Seokjin asks, stepping closer, Yoongi walks backward until his back touches his car door. “Did Namjoon say shit about him too?”
Yoongi frowns, “Namjoon?”
“Don’t play dumb, it doesn’t suit you at all.”
Yoongi takes that as a compliment and gently pushes him away, he doesn't want to repeat the situation from the tree.
“Don’t get so worked up. No one told me anything, it was pretty obvious.”
“There’s nothing between Jungkook and me, he has a boyfriend and–”
“And you? Do you have a boyfriend?”
Seokjin tongues his cheek shaking his head, “No, I don’t.” his voice comes out cold and sharp.
Yoongi giggles softly, “why do you sound so bitter?”
Seokjin stares at him in silence, it looks like he is processing the question, but he doesn't answer it. He turns around, ignoring Yoongi’s teasing, grabs a helmet, and hands it to him.
“Put it on,” Seokjin orders.
“What about my car?”
“I’ll send someone for it, it’ll be waiting for you outside my apartment in the morning. Now take the helmet.”
Yoongi crosses his arms “What about you?” He isn't a fool, he knows that’s the same helmet Seokjin wore in the races earlier.
“My apartment is near, it’s okay. Thank you for worrying though, maybe you don’t hate me as much as I thought.”
“That’s not–”
“Put. It. On.”
Yoongi huffs but does as he is told.
He looks at his car one last time as he sits on the Yamaha. Seokjin starts the motor again, making the growl echo across the empty street.
“Stop pouting,” Seokjin scolds, startling Yoongi. The latter didn't notice he was pouting. “Someone will come for your car, I promise. Stop looking like you’ll never drive it again. You are so dramatic.”
“I'm sure you would be as ‘dramatic’ as me if someone made you leave your ‘baby’ parked in the middle of nowhere, so don't be an ass–”
His words are cut short when Seokjin grabs his wrists and wraps them around his waist in a tight hug. “Make sure you don’t fall off, I’m not a gentle driver.”
Yoongi rapidly removes his arms from his waist as if touching Seokjin was forbidden. “I don’t think it's necessary, I can hold onto–”
“I told you to hold on tight, didn't I?” Seokjin interrupts sharply, putting Yoongi’s arms around his waist again. “Be careful as I drive, I won't stop even if you fall off on the pavement.”
Yoongi’s eyes go blank at first, not taking his warning seriously. He moves his hands away again, holding onto the back of the motorcycle.
Soon he discovers that Seokjin drives like there’s no one else in the city besides him, which, well, it’s kinda true, it’s late and the streets are clear.
Still, he drives like he is possessed.
When they pass past a police car, Yoongi expects them to stop Seokjin. Turns out they don't. The two men inside only stare at Seokjin and Yoongi passing by, like this is normal.
Even after that, Yoongi still refuses to hold on tight. However, a narrow curve comes, surprising Yoongi, almost making him fall off on the pavement.
He curses, terrified, tugging at Seokjin’s jacket, gripping at it tightly.
His chest glues to Seokjin’s back as his helmet finds a place on Seokjin’s blades, holding onto his body the best he can.
After a few seconds, he feels Seokjin’s body vibrating, as he laughs at him.
“Fuck off!” Yoongi screams, half annoyed, half scared.
Seokjin just laughs louder at him, bringing one of his hands to check if Yoongi’s hands are positioned correctly now.
“I hope you learned!” Seokjin screams back, but Yoongi just sighs and holds onto Seokjin as if his life depended on him.
“How was it?”
“You’re an awful driver,” compared to Taehyung, is left unsaid.
“Should I remind you that you are here because I won you in a race? I don’t think I’m that bad,” Seokjin says with a teasing grin.“Besides, if you followed instructions properly, you wouldn’t have scared yourself like that.”
“You drive insanely fast, I don’t think it’s even legal,” Yoongi whines, having a bit of trouble unlocking the helmet.
“We don’t care about such formalities, one fat check and that’s sorted out.”
Yoongi rolls his eyes. Why is he even surprised? “You are ridiculous.”
Seokjin hums, looking at him with a judgemental look as Yoongi remains unable to unlock the straps.
“Do you need help with that?”
“No.”
“What, are you too petty to let me do it for you? Too much pride?”
Yoongi huffs, annoyed. “Fine, unlock this. It's strangling me.”
Seokjin laughs, carefully opening the clasp and removing the helmet. Yoongi sighs in relief when the heavy weight isn't on his head anymore.
“You are so dramatic,” Seokjin repeats, walking away first. Yoongi doesn't reply, he just follows him closely, not familiar with the place.
After a minute ride on the elevator, they finally step into Seokjin’s apartment.
Yoongi won’t lie, it looks better than he expected. This is pretty much the nicest apartment he has visited in Seoul.
Just recalling his shitty dorm right now feels like torture.
“Do you live here by yourself?” He asks quietly, walking around the spacious living room.
He wishes he could stay in a nice place like this, but due to his last-minute application, he got the worst dorm to ever exist. It seems like all the students in their University have their parties in that cursed building.
“I usually share it with my brother when he is in town,” Seokjin answers, distractedly searching for something in the kitchen.
Yoongi refuses to look in his direction, so he walks to the floor-to-ceiling windows instead, taking a look outside.
It’s dark, the sky looks nearly black, only the moon keeps them company.
After around five minutes of silence, someone –Seokjin– clicks his tongue, tired of being ignored.
“Do you want something to drink? or are you going to stay there staring out of the window the whole night?” Seokjin asks with a tired tone.
Yoongi turns around to receive the bottle of beer that Seokjin is already offering to him. He finishes half of it in just one go. Seokjin blinks at him.
“It's a relief you have a decent place. I was scared you might bring me to a crack house or something like that,” Yoongi finally murmurs.
Seokjin chokes on his own beer, “Wait, what? Who do you think I am?”
“I don't know much about you.”
“Yeah, I can see that, but a crack house? Seriously?” Seokjin shakes his head looking entertained.
“All I know about you is that you are a rich brat,” Yoongi murmurs as if it explained anything. “And that you hate Namjoon, and that's why you hate me, which is very stu–”
“You think I hate you?” Seokjin asks with a sinful grin on his face.
“Don't you?” Yoongi asks back, watching him walk away through the window’s reflection.
Seokjin giggles, throwing himself on the sofa, “I only know one thing about you, that I like your hair, a lot.”
Yoongi frowns, turning around just to find Seokjin’s eyes already on him. He feels the intensity of his gaze, feels Seokjin’s eyes trailing down his entire body, stopping on his eyes.
“That's it?” Yoongi asks, trying to sound unimpressed. He still feels his cheeks heating. “That's all you know about me? That you ‘like my hair’?”
“Yeah, the color suits you. It looks good on you.”
Yoongi shakes his head, turning to the window again. “Yeah, sure. When are you going to stop making fun of me?”
Seokjin frowns and doesn’t reply, slipping into a thick silence instead. However, as soon as he finishes his beer, he stands up, slowly erasing the space between them.
Yoongi cautiously observes his reflection on the window, watching him approaching from behind.
Suddenly, he feels Seokjin’s fingers carding softly through his hair.
The touch is barely there, but Yoongi can feel it vibrating all over his body.
“I really like it, you stand out from the crowd with it,” Seokjin whispers as his finger tangles with a soft strand of mint hair.
Yoongi wants to push him away. In his mind, he is pushing him away.
Physically, he is frozen on spot.
He stares at their reflection, watching how his small figure contrasts with Seokjin’s wide body.
Yoongi’s lack of verbal response to Seokjin's words ends up in Seokjin touching his hair with more familiarity.
Yoongi can't move, he feels like he is drowned in a daze; a rare combination of tiredness, alcohol and the vulnerable need to be touched.
It’s not his fault. How long has it been since the last time Taehyung held him? One month? Two months? It's hard to tell now.
He missed this feeling. Someone’s eyes on him, someone’s hands on him, someone breathing near his skin.
He closes his lazy eyes as Seokjin’s chest meets his back, letting Yoongi lean on him if he needs to.
“Stop that,” Yoongi blurts out when Seokjin’s breath gets dangerously close to his ear.
Seokjin chuckles softly, “I thought you liked it.”
Yoongi doesn't want to admit it, but he does.
It’s not something he can focus on now. Not when Seokjin rests his chin on his shoulder making Yoongi’s mind stop processing thoughts completely.
Seokjin could back hug him right now and Yoongi would probably disintegrate.
What's wrong with him?
“You are a quiet guy,” Seokjin whispers after a while, “I like that too,” Yoongi opens his eyes at those words, turning his head to face Seokjin. “You have pretty eyes as well, cat eyes,” the older man breathes out.
Yoongi swallows under his gaze, raising his chin, getting slightly closer to his face. “Are you flirting with me?”
Seokjin chuckles, caressing his mint hair. “Am I?”
Yoongi’s narrowed eyes fall on the perfect curve of his upper lip, on the seductive shape of his mouth.
If Yoongi kissed Seokjin right now, would his tongue taste as addicting as the sound of his voice?
Maybe Seokjin can read through his eyes, because he moves slightly closer, rubbing the tip of their noses together.
“Do you want me to flirt with you?” he asks in a whisper, “Should I flirt with you?”
His breath caresses Yoongi’s lower lip, it's minty, with a soft hint of beer. It complements Seokjin’s perfume perfectly.
It's sweet, bitter, and desirable. The smell of danger.
Yoongi would lean one inch closer and touch his lips, finishing with this pointless game.
The thing is that Seokjin isn't just a random hookup he met in a club tonight, no, Seokjin is the guy that humiliated him at The Trails, treating him like he was nothing. Worse, treating him like he was something he could just take and own.
“This has to stop,” Yoongi whispers shortly, sighing and turning his face to the window again.
“Okay,” Seokjin replies with his brows furrowed. Yoongi can see his reflection covered in confusion. “I wasn't flirting with you though,” Seokjin starts, “I already told you this, but I’m not going to do anything tonight.”
“Because you are not like Namjoon, and I'm not your type.” Yoongi completes, remembering Seokjin’s words from earlier.
“Exactly. I’m not like him, I would never do what he did. I would never fuck someone’s else boyfriend,” he finishes firmly.
Yoongi grimaces, where did that come from?
“I'm not that cruel,” Seokjin continues, “No matter what your perception of me is, I'm not as bad as you think.”
Yoongi hums, still confused. “Are you saying that you don't sleep with guys that are dating? Is that it?”
“Yeah, I don’t.”
At his words, Yoongi remembers the scene in the forest. He remembers Seokjin’s hand on the young guy’s ass and remembers their mouths too busy tasting each other to pay attention to their surroundings.
He can't hide the chuckle that escapes from his mouth.
“You are lying,” Yoongi concludes.
“Why do you think I’m lying? Why do you sound so sure about it?”
Yoongi chuckles ironically. “Maybe because I saw you making out in the forest tonight, making out with Jungkook, and correct me if I'm wrong but you said he has a boyfriend.”
There's an awkward silence before Seokjin’s surprised voice comes out again. “You saw me?” Yoongi hums, locking his fierce eyes with Seokjin’s, daring him to deny it to his face. “Okay, yeah. I guess I wasn't really careful tonight. Now stop looking at me like that. God, you are scary,”
Yoongi rolls his eyes, “So you do fuck with guys that are taken,” Yoongi doesn't know why it matters to clarify it, but it does.
“No, not guys, just Jungkook,” Seokjin explains shamelessly. “But I would never do that with another person, especially not with Namjoon’s boyfriend, it doesn't matter how beautiful and mint-haired he is,” he says nonchalantly.
Yoongi blinks, quite shaken by his words. Did Seokjin just imply that Yoongi and Namjoon are… a thing? Hold on.
“Did you just–Did you just bring me home because you thought I'm Namjoon’s boyfriend?” It sounds like a rhetorical question so Seokjin stays quiet this time.
Yoongi gasps, finally understanding the source of all this mess. “Please tell me you are joking. Please tell me you didn't make my night a nightmare just because you thought I was dating Namjoon. Oh. My. God.”
Seokjin walks backward, suddenly putting enough distance between them, “You are not his boyfriend?”
Yoongi gasps again, “I'm not! I would never date Namjoonie, he is like my younger brother!”
Seokjin looks visibly puzzled now, “But– but you were– you were with him the entire night! He had his arm wrapped around you almost the whole night. Everyone thought you were dating him, not just me!”
Yoongi’s eyes grow wide at that, “What? Are all of you a bunch of idiots?”
Seokjin rubs his eyes, looking rather frustrated now, “Fuck. Are you really not his boyfriend?” Yoongi throws a murdering look at him. “Okay, calm down, I get it.”
“Having your arm wrapped around someone doesn't mean anything romantic. Are you fifteen years old?”
“You were sitting on his Ducati before the race, we all saw you. For us, motorcycles are sacred, no one sits on them, that's well-known information in our circle.”
“I didn't know that.”
“You didn't have to know that. If Namjoon let you sit there, it was because he wanted us to know that you were off-limits, that you were untouchable, that's why I thought you two were dating.”
Yoongi huffs, “And you still decided to be an ass with me? Don't you have codes or something?”
“If he doesn't respect the codes, why would I?”
Yoongi groans, “Listen, I have no idea what happened between you two, but this isn't okay.”
Seokjin sighs, calming himself. “I know, I know, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done the whole race bet. I thought something was going on between you two.”
Yoongi shakes his head in disbelief. So that's the only reason Seokjin took him home. But why? Why would Seokjin want to mess up with Namjoon’s love partner?
Everything is so messy.
“I hope it's clear that I'm not dating him. I really hope that something like this doesn't happen again.”
Seokjin nods, scratching the back of his head, “It won't, I’m sorry.”
Seokjin sits on the sofa in front, narrowing his eyes at the younger. “I don't understand though, why were you with Namjoon tonight? I’ve been his friend for a while already and I’d never seen you with him before, yet you two seem close. Where did you come from?”
Yoongi huffs, not in the mood for introductions. “I just moved to Seoul, I'm from Daegu.”
“You are from Daegu? That's Namjoon’s hometown.”
“I'm also Taehyung’s boyfriend,” That makes Seokjin raise his eyebrows, recognizing the name, “I mean, ex-boyfriend,” Yoongi corrects himself with a tight chest. It kinda stings. “And I won't talk about that ever again.”
Seokjin hums, “Well, Jungkook used to be my boyfriend too, and I hate talking about him with people. Believe me, I understand.”
Yoongi sighs, now things made more sense. “So that's why you said he was special... I can tell you still have something strong going on–”
“Didn't you hear me? I said I hate talking about him.”
Yoongi raises his brow at the sharp interruption, keeping quiet after it. Seokjin sighs, flicking his eyes across the room. There's something awkward in the air now.
“Do you want another beer?” Seokjin asks finally, standing up.
Yoongi shrugs, “I guess I do. I kinda need one.”
“We can go to bed later,” Seokjin says from the kitchen.
Yoongi blinks rapidly, joining him, “You won't make me sleep with you, will you?”
Seokjin chokes out a laugh, embarrassed. He shakes his head, “Of course not. That was never part of the plan.” So he did have a plan, Yoongi thinks.
“Although, maybe you can tell Namjoon that we shared a bed? You are not his boyfriend but you are important for him so–”
Yoongi crosses his arms, “I won't mortify him with this.”
“Oh, kitten, you are no fun,” Seokjin replies with a mocking pout.
Did he say k-kitten…? Yoongi scowls at him.
“I don't– I don't like lying,” Yoongi stutters, still shaken by the unexpected pet name.
“Oh? Is that it? Should I try kissing you for real then? So you wouldn't have to lie?” Seokjin jokes with his head facing the fridge, choosing the beers.
Yoongi rolls his eyes at his constant teasing. Does Seokjin think he is the only one that can play that game?
Yoongi is getting tired of this.
He walks around the kitchen aisle, catching Seokjin still facing the fridge. Yoongi closes the door, obligating a surprised Seokjin to turn around and face him.
“Why are you messing around with me?” Yoongi asks softly. Seokjin frowns, visibly confused by the sudden proximity. He can't reply, Yoongi doesn't give him the chance to do so. “Is it fun for you, Seokjin?” Yoongi asks, holding his chin, pulling their faces closer.
Seokjin gapes, “I'm not–”
“You know what's funny? We could've been making out by now,” Yoongi whispers, with feigned disappointment. “We could’ve been kissing on that couch. Or maybe I would be down here,” he says putting his thigh in between Seokjin’s legs. “Doing something even better with my mouth.”
As soon as Yoongi stops talking, Seokjin chases for his mouth, taking him by surprise. His lips land on Yoongi’s cheek.
“But here you are, only using me to upset Namjoon,” Yoongi continues as if nothing has happened, locking his eyes with Seokjin’s again. “What a waste of time, don’t you think? I thought you were smarter than this. You looked smarter than this.”
Seokjin’s ears become redder under Yoongi’s eyes, visibly affected by all his mocking.
“I’ll go to bed now, Seokjin-ssi, I'm tired,” Yoongi whispers, but he has not gotten enough, he needs to do something else, provoke him a bit more.
That's how his lips are drawn to the crook of his neck, leaving a chaste kiss hidden in the perfect spot where his pulse is, crossing the thin line between them.
The scent of Seokjin blossoms in that intimate closeness. Yoongi can smell his perfume and his skin so raw and strong, discovering it's slightly more addicting than he had noticed earlier.
The tip of his nose traces a path of its own, while his lips follow right behind.
Yoongi knows he is provoking him, he knows his pride is getting hurt by being messed around like this.
“Yoongi,” Seokjin warns, and it's the first time he says his name. His deep voice, charged with contained hunger, sends a thrill through Yoongi’s body.
“Tell me,” Yoongi whispers, nibbling at his earlobe.
“Yoongi, you are playing with the wrong person,” he warns, swallowing when Yoongi’s hand wraps around his neck briefly.
Yoongi shakes his head, sliding his lips down again, tracing the curve of his neck with small kisses.
“I think you played with the wrong person first, and now you are paying the consequences,” Yoongi mumbles back, parting his lips, finally kissing his skin open-mouthed.
“Careful, Kitten,” Seokjin growls, tilting his neck to the side.
Yoongi smirks, allowing himself to have this, just this once.
He closes his eyes, and kisses Seokjin’s neck, sliding both of his hands over his wide shoulders, and back down over his clothed chest.
Seokjin hums, wrapping his arms around Yoongi’s waist, pulling him a bit closer by his lower back.
The soft melody of Yoongi’s lips echo around the privacy of Seokjin’s apartment, it's the only sound that can be heard in the entire place.
“I told you we could've had fun,” Yoongi whispers like it’s a secret.
He let's his shy tongue out, tasting and exploring Seokjin for the first time, right over the prominence of his Adam’s apple, kissing his chin at the end.
He takes a look at Seokjin, who’s eyes closed, visibly enjoying this.
Is then when Yoongi bites over the small spot of his pulse, making Seokjin inhale sharply, rocking his hips against Yoongi’s.
There’s a curse coming out inaudibly as his hands squeeze Yoongi’s hips, putting him flush to the space between his legs.
Maybe Yoongi is playing with fire indeed, because his lips part and the back of his throat makes an involuntary sound when he feels his clothed bulge pressing against his. That wasn't supposed to happen.
“Fuck,” Seokjin breaths out.
Yoongi sucks at him, always in the same place, not stopping even if Seokjin starts rocking his hips against him. Not stopping even if his own hips mirror Seokjin’s movements. Not stopping even if Seokjin’s stray hands scratch his back pockets.
“Kiss me,” Seokjin’s panting voice whispers near his ear, and it almost sounds like a broken plea.
Yoongi knows he has lost most of his self-control when his first reaction is to search for Seokjin’s lips. But something in the back of his head reminds him of his promise, reminds him that his hair is still mint, reminds him that Seokjin is not Taehyung.
So even if he is still panting himself, he decides is time to stop.
He regrets it, for sure. He wants to keep going, the bulge in his jeans want to keep going, Seokjin’s captivating sounds makes him want to keep going, but he stops either way. He has to.
When his mouth finally leaves Seokjin’s neck, there's a dark mark on his skin, a mark that won’t be able to be erased in at least a week, and it pleases Yoongi to know that he made it.
Seokjin searches for his lips again, misunderstanding Yoongi’s intentions to stop, so Yoongi has to dodge his lips once again, even if it's harder to say no this time.
“I hope this will remind you not to mess around with me,” Yoongi whispers, slowly taking Seokjin’s hands off his hips, distancing their bodies.
The way Yoongi misses his warmth is a bad sign.
“Yoongi,” Seokjin tries to hold his hand, but the younger is quicker and leaves him with his hand hanging.
“It was fun meeting you, but I'm tired, so I’ll go to bed now.”
Seokjin’s eyes are fierce, incredulous even, but after staring at Yoongi’s eyes for a few seconds, he doesn't insist anymore.
Instead, he grabs his beer and leads the way to his brother’s bedroom, letting Yoongi know he can take it for the night and asking for his car keys.
Yoongi takes a shower as soon as he locks himself inside the room, and stays under cold water for enough time to keep the heat from coming back.
Even after that, that night becomes the first night Yoongi dreams of Seokjin.
Friday night at The Trails is always busy and cramped.
Seokjin doesn’t go to The Trails every week, and even if he pays a visit, it’s not always to actively participate in the competitions.
Jaehwan isn’t a fan of those nights where his best racer doesn't participate, but tonight he doesn’t argue against Seokjin’s decision. Not with Jung Hoseok, the renowned racer from Busan University, staying in Seoul and rumored to visit The Trails at some point of the night.
Everyone in Seoul University knows about the feud between the racers of each city, it isn’t explicit but there is a tense vibe in the air that can’t be ignored.
When Seokjin steps into The Trails tonight, everyone has a different sparkle in their eyes and it can only mean one thing: Hoseok is already here.
Seokjin sees his leather jacket from behind, the big Hope word written in rainbow colors gives him away. His mere presence makes Seokjin’s hands turn into fists inside his pockets.
“Jung,” Seokjin says with a sharp tone. The young man is just a meter away from him so their eyes meet easily when Hoseok turns around.
Seokjin still wonders how he managed to have a fling with that dude? It makes no sense.
Hoseok is hot, that’s a given, but he is also an ass. Even now, the way he looks in Seokjin’s direction, with that familiar arrogance in his eyes, makes the older man want to spit on his face.
Right, that bitter ‘enmity’ was the reason they hooked up.
Remembering their messy encounter makes Seokjin question his life decisions. Glad he was drunk and heartbroken, at least he can say he wasn’t in his right mind.
“Jin-ah, long time no see.” Jin-ah. Seriously? Ever since the night they slept together, Hoseok has called him that way. Seokjin hates it.
“I see you’re doing well. It’s nice to have you back.” Seokjin mutters with a tight jaw.
“I wanted to pay a visit, maybe have some fun. I heard you are not competing tonight, is that right?”
Seokjin nods, “I’ve been busy this week, today I just want to relax and get wasted.”
Hoseok grins at him, “Well, I heard there’s a party in the Park’s dorm, I’d like to see you there.”
Not a chance, Seokjin thinks immediately. “I’ll think about it.”
Hoseok nods, “Sure.”
“I’ll take a look around, to see how everything is going. Good luck tonight.” Seokjin says, offering his hand.
Hoseok shakes it in a firm grip, raising his chin, “Thank you, Jin-ah, but I don’t think I will need it.”
Hoseok wins the two rounds he runs, he beats Jungkook’s ass too, who, for some reason, is in the same round as him.
Is the brat trying to prove himself? Seokjin doesn’t know what’s going on tonight with Jungkook but he seems to be out of his mind.
Namjoon ends up third, but Seokjin knows him, he knows he did it on purpose. He knows Namjoon wanted to give the brat the chance to win.
In moments like this, Seokjin wonders when did Namjoon started developing feelings for Jungkook, and vice versa.
No matter how much Jungkook denied his feelings for Namjoon, Seokjin knows there's more behind it.
Well, he needs to believe there's more behind it. He refuses to believe that his beloved boyfriend slept with Namjoon just because he was horny. That's too plain, too impersonal. Jungkook is better than that.
“You trained him well,” Hoseok says suddenly, abruptly interrupting Seokjin’s thoughts.
“I didn’t train him, I only taught him the basics and he aced it. He is that good.”
Hoseok chuckles, drinking his beer.
“He admires you though, or maybe he is just jealous of me? I’m not sure. You are not together anymore, are you?”
“That’s none of your business,” Seokjin answers sharply, looking in his direction, “But no, we broke up.”
Hoseok hums knowingly then. “He told me something funny, I guess he is jealous. Maybe he knows about our encounter?”
Seokjin frowns at the younger man, “Shut up. He doesn’t know and he has nothing to be jealous about, so stop talking about it. Should I remind you that we had a deal?”
Hoseok chuckles, “Okay, okay, calm down. I forgot Jungkook was a sensitive topic for you.”
Seokjin sighs, running out of patience. “I said shut up.”
“Relax, I'm just messing with you,” he squeezes Seokjin’s shoulder as if he had the right to touch him. “Anyway, let's talk about something else. Are you coming to the party tonight?”
Seokjin shakes his head, “I don't think so, partying is not really my thing.”
Hoseok bumps his fist on his arm, “Come on, we deserve a few drinks, and I mean good drinks, not just cheap beer,” He says raising the empty bottle in his hand. “Do you still have that nice bar at your apartment? We could go there tonight, we had fun last time.”
The undertone bothers Seokjin, he faces him again, ready to answer something sharp and vile, but Hoseok’s attention shifts towards someone else.
“I think this night just got better,” Hoseok mumbles mostly to himself.
Seokjin turns around, curiously.
His eyes are immediately drawn to Min Yoongi’s mint hair, to the way it moves along with the faint wind, so gracefully.
Seokjin still remembers the first night he saw him, innocently staring around on Namjoon’s Ducati.
That night he was biting his lips the same nervous way he is doing now, the only difference is that now Seokjin knows how those lips feel against his skin.
If anyone removed his turtleneck, they would still find proof of it.
“That’s the guy, isn’t he?” Hoseok asks, bringing Seokjin back to reality.
“What?”
“The dude from last week, that's him, isn't he?”
“What do you even know about him?” Seokjin asks with evident confusion.
“Nothing, I just heard that you started making interesting bets lately,” Hoseok says with a mocking grin. “I don’t judge you. Now that I look at him, I think I’d have done it too–”
“Don’t,” Seokjin cuts him sharply.
Hoseok shoots Seokjin a suspicious glance, “Don’t? Don't what?”
“Don't bother him, don't involve him, leave him out of our business, Jung.”
“I didn’t know you were interested in such twinks. I mean, I don't judge you, he is hot and perfectly sized for us, but I thought you liked buff guys. What does he taste like, though? I bet he tastes sweet.”
Seokjin exhales through his nose.
His tone, his words, even the way he looks at Yoongi bothers him.
“That’s none of your business, stop being gross,” Seokjin scolds with a clenched jaw. “Besides, what happened last week was not–”
Before Seokjin can explain further, Hoseok walks past him in Yoongi’s direction, leaving him behind.
Seokjin follows him with his eyes, not moving yet.
He watches as Yoongi’s face changes completely when Hoseok joins them, watches his defensive mode activating, watches the threatening look appearing in his eyes.
The sight makes his feet move in their direction as well, he needs to put Hoseok away before he starts shit.
However, his plan is rapidly crushed by a hand holding his forearm. “Relax, you are not a superhero,” Jaehwan whispers into his ear, putting Seokjin away from the crowd.
“I didn’t say I was, I just want Hoseok away from him.”
Jaehwan sighs, “Let Namjoon handle it.”
Taking into account the events from last week, Seokjin doesn’t want Namjoon to be in charge of anything.
“Hoseok is only doing this to bother me, he thinks I like Yoongi, he thinks he is an easy target after what happened last week. He only wants to piss us off.”
“Did you give him reasons to believe you like him? Why would he think that?” Jaehwan asks, narrowing his eyes suspiciously.
Seokjin exhales in desperation, “I didn't say anything. You know I don't like Yoongi, this is not like that at all.”
“Okay.”
Seokjin doesn't seem too happy with that short response, “Im serious, I’m not into him, he isn’t my–”
“I said okay, you don't have to justify yourself,” Jaehwan whispers shortly.
Just then, the environment shifts completely, making Seokjin return his attention back to Namjoon’s circle.
There's something captivating and disturbing about The Trails and trouble, a unique scent.
Whether you are familiarized with The Trails or not, you know when someone is trying to start a fight. It's all about the sudden silence in the place, and the familiar whispers coming from all edges.
Trouble suits The Trails beautifully, Seokjin is used to that, yet tonight it feels wrong.
He can't hear what's happening a few meters away from him, but he knows what's going on, he knows what Hoseok is trying to provoke, what he is trying to replicate.
Seokjin focuses his eyes on Yoongi alone, nothing else deserve his attention right now. He catches the mint-haired man wandering his eyes around the crowd, looking uncomfortable. The look on his eyes doesn't sit right with Seokjin at all.
When their eyes meet, Seokjin swallows under Yoongi’s puzzled gaze.
It feels like it's his duty to stand up for him. After all, Seokjin is the only one that can put a stop to Hoseok, not only because he is the head of the entire place, but because this is a consequence of his past actions.
Also, he knows Yoongi is new to The Trails, new to Seoul, he probably doesn't know any better.
But Seokjin does know all of it, so he pays a short glance at his friend standing next to him and says, “Jaehwan, lend me your motorcycle,” he words it out like a favor, but it comes out like an order. “And your jacket too,” he adds, remembering he is only wearing a denim jacket tonight.
Jaehwan looks baffled by his words. “Are you serious?”
Seokjin clicks his tongue, taking off his jacket, “Just let me borrow it, come on.”
“Seokjin-ah, my bike is brand new,” Jaehwan replies, taking off his leather jacket, “If you crash it, I’ll take yours as payment.”
Seokjin snorts “Jae, you know who you are talking to, right? In case you don't remember, my victories paid for half of that bike, so give me the keys.”
Jaehwan rolls his eyes, “The keys are inside the left pocket. What do you want my bike for anyway?”
Seokjin doesn’t answer, instead, he looks back at Yoongi.
The younger man is focused on Hoseok, brows furrowed and lips slamming together in a firm line.
It might sound odd, but Seokjin can read the murdering thoughts running inside his head.
Yoongi might be cute and pocket size, but he is equally intimidating when he stares at people with those mischievous Kitten eyes.
Suddenly, people start whistling around Seokjin and he knows he is running out of time.
Yoongi’s eyes find Seokjin’s as soon as the latter takes one step closer, almost as if he was waiting for him to walk to his side.
Seokjin doesn’t know if he sees relief or more stress on them, maybe both, but that doesn’t stop him from moving forward.
“Jung, I heard you are making interesting bets tonight,” Seokjin fakely jokes, using similar words to the ones Hoseok said earlier.
The younger man turns around with an entertained grin on his face. “You got me inspired,”
Seokjin raises one of his eyebrows “Did I?”
“Did you tell him to do this? Are you such an ass Seokjin? Didn't you have enough the other night?” Namjoon asks bitterly.
Seokjin ignores him, taking Jaehwan keys out of the pocket. He raises his hand, so the crowd can see his intentions.
“Seokjin,” Yoongi calls in a warning tone, “Please don’t–”
“I think I have the right to participate. What do you think guys?” Seokjin asks the crowd. Everyone is already cheering for him, this must be funny for them. But not for Yoongi, he shakes his head vehemently. “What do you two think? Are you up to try to beat me?”
“I thought you weren’t competing tonight,” Hoseok answers, taking the keys off his hand, inspecting them. “This is not your bike either, this is a Ducati.”
“You’ll like it,” Seokjin replies, taking the keys back. “You’ll like it too, Namjoon-ah. It's parked there, you can check it out later,” Namjoon doesn’t tear his murdering eyes away from Seokjin.
In Seokjin's defense, he is doing this to save Yoongi’s ass from Hoseok hands.
It might be hypocritical of him after what he did the weekend before, but unlike Seokjin, Hoseok would never stop trying to get Yoongi under his spell, he would never stop until the very end.
“So, are you two up to beat me?”
When both guys nod, mostly due to the crowd pressure, everyone cheers and records them for their social media.
Yoongi only stands there with his arms crossed, staring at Seokjin like he wants to rip his head open, again.
Luckily for Seokjin, he is now getting used to that threatening look in his eyes, so he just winks in his direction.
He is ready to win Yoongi again.
“I thought I was clear the other night!” Yoongi screams, half an hour later, when he finally finds Seokjin at the other side of the parking lot.
Seokjin jumps in his spot, turning around to face Yoongi.
“I thought we were on good terms, I thought you listened to what I said and were willing to be nicer to me. What did I even do to you? Why do you keep treating me like a fucking toy?”
Seokjin just stares at him, visibly confused.
Maybe Yoongi should be congratulating him first, Seokjin won the race with a great advantage after all. But he is too blinded to praise his outstanding skills.
“Hello to you too,” Seokjin finally whispers, still looking shaken.
On the other side, Jaehwan stares at Yoongi with rounded eyes too, handing Seokjin a bottle of water.
“Uhm, I think I’ll see you later, Jin-ah,” he murmurs, slowly walking past them.
“Wait, don’t leave me alone, he will kill me as soon as you’re gone,” Seokjin whispers with feigned fear, grabbing his friend’s hand.
Yoongi’s cheeks get painted a bright red shade. He didn’t notice Seokjin’s friend was there.
Jaehwan giggles, “He won’t kill you, and if he does, I’d support him, you're kinda annoying after all.”
Seokjin rolls his eyes, “Get your ass out of here.”
When they are finally alone, Yoongi sits on a bench, avoiding Seokjin’s eyes, putting his attention on his own fingers instead.
He feels as Seokjin takes off the leather jacket he was wearing and puts on a denim one. He feels Seokjin’s scrutinized gaze falling on him like he is waiting for Yoongi to say something, anything.
Seokjin clears his throat after a few minutes of thick silence. “Everything alright with you?” he asks.
Yoongi shakes his head, “I thought things were cleared between us, why did you do that?” Yoongi asks in a whisper, a bit calmer now. “My entire week was a nightmare because of you, and I needed this to fade away, but now you ruined it again.”
Yoongi sees Seokjin faltering in his movements for a second, “Your week was a nightmare? What do you mean?” he asks with genuine interest.
“Don’t answer my question with another question.”
Seokjin scowls, sitting next to him. “What do you want me to tell you? I just wanted to help you–”
“Help me?” Yoongi interrupts, sounding a bit incredulous.
“Yes, that's why I saved your ass,” Seokjin replies as if it wasn't obvious.
Yoongi’s face transforms into a very confused one, “Save my ass?” he repeats. “What are you even saying? Namjoon was going to win, that was the plan, you just ruined it.”
“Namjoon?” Seokjin asks, baffled. “You thought Namjoon was going to win? Yoongi, I don’t know if you are being too cute or too naive.”
Yoongi stands up, getting mad again. “He could’ve won if you weren’t there.”
“No, he wouldn't. You have no idea what you are talking about.”
Yoongi scowls at him, he isn’t as clueless as Seokjin thinks. “I told you I’m Taehyung’s ex-boyfriend,” he says as matter of fact. “You know who Kim Taehyung is, right?”
Seokjin tongues his cheek, unimpressed. “Kind of, I saw him competing in Japan last year.”
“Right, your brother was in that competition as well,” Yoongi replies, knowingly.
At those words, he receives a surprised look from the man in front of him.
“How do you know about my family?” Seokjin asks with narrowed eyes.
“Everybody knows about your family.”
Seokjin bites his inner cheek, slightly annoyed, “Namjoon told you who my father was, didn't he?”
“That's not important.”
“That means he did because last week you had no idea who I was,” Seokjin replies, bitterly.
Yoongi’s eyes go blank. “Going back to the point, Tae taught me enough to know that Namjoon is better. He controls his space and speed on the circuit better than Hoseok, he is more skilled than Hoseok too, he–”
“Even if all that was true, Hoseok would’ve still won.”
“Listen, I know you hate Namjoon, but you should give him a little bit of credit. You know he is better, look at me and tell me he is not.”
Seokjin doesn't hesitate, standing up with a raised chin, locking their eyes.
Seokjin’s gaze is threatening, heated, fierce. It makes Yoongi tear his eyes apart first.
There’s something unusual about Seokjin that's difficult to decipher.
It's like he has the unspoken talent to bring particular reactions out of Yoongi’s body. Reactions he isn't familiarized with. Reactions he doesn't like, because they make him feel exposed.
“Namjoon is better,” Seokjin whispers with a soothing voice. Yoongi hears him but refuses to look back at him. Not this close.
“I told you.”
“But,” Seokjin proceeds, grabbing Yoongi’s chin with delicate fingers, guiding his eyes back to him. Yoongi's entire body shivers following his movement.
“But Hoseok is a bit– a bit naughty.”
“What does that even mean?” Yoongi asks, quietly.
Seokjin shrugs, “It means that he can make a stupid trick out of nowhere, and kick you out of the speedway in a second.”
Yoongi flinches, “That doesn’t sound fair, it sounds illegal and dangerous.”
Seokjin chuckles then, a sweet smile covers his lips.
“Kitten,” he says fondly. “Nothing in here is legal. We are not supposed to be here, this entire place shouldn’t exist, but it does, and we have rules, but even those rules can be broken sometimes by some people,” Seokjin whispers, tugging Yoongi’s messy strand of hair behind his ear. “I just wanted to look after you.”
Yoongi freezes at his touch, at his voice, at his eyes.
The touch makes Yoongi feel small, vulnerable, and lost.
Yoongi never feels small, vulnerable, or lost.
Yoongi is grand, independent, and as strong as the rocks under their feet. But Seokjin has just made him feel small, and that’s strange, and for some reason, it’s exactly how Yoongi has been feeling since he moved to Seoul, it's just that he refused to acknowledge it.
Seokjin’s hand remains on his hair, his thumb caresses the top of his ear very briefly, maybe by accident, maybe not. Yoongi only knows he wants to lean on his touch and hide in Seokjin’s neck for the rest of the night until he feels big again.
“Oh, I didn’t know I was interrupting,” a familiar voice murmurs from their backs. Yoongi quickly snaps back to their reality, grabbing Seokjin’s hand, putting it away from his hair. “I guess I wasn’t that wrong earlier,” Hoseok says with a mischievous grin on his face.
Seokjin sighs deeply, “Jung, go away.”
“So that’s how it works here?” Hoseok asks, mockingly. “Namjoon takes your boyfriend, so now you take his boyfriend? Interesting modus operandi, I guess people from Seoul are more open-minded than I thought.”
Yoongi frowns at his words, turning around to face Seokjin instead. His face doesn’t say anything, he remains unbothered, yet Yoongi feels his hand being squeezed.
“Jung, what do you want?” Seokjin asks with a tired tone.
“Just wanted to ask if you were coming to the party, or maybe you were up for something else, but I guess your night is full already,” his eyes fell on Yoongi with disdain. “I’ll just go and have fun, see you soon, Jin-ah. See you soon too, doll,” he adds in Yoongi’s direction.
Is Yoongi crazy or is this guy looking at him with resentment? What did he even do to that man?
Are all the racers in The Trails fucking insane?
But then he recognizes the shade in his eyes, he recognizes the jealousy, he recognizes the desire. Hoseok wanted Seokjin, that's why he is here.
Yoongi looks down at the way Seokjin is holding his hand, a loose hold, a shy hold. So Yoongi takes the task upon himself and intertwines their fingers with confidence.
The way Hoseok’s eyes harden, confirms Yoongi’s theory.
“Good night to you too,” Yoongi replies drily, “But my name is Min Yoongi, not doll.”
“Doll suits you better.”
“I agree, doll suits him better,” Seokjin whispers, raising his free hand and caressing Yoongi’s cheek with his thumb. Yoongi doesn't move, taken by surprise. “He is beautiful, isn't he?” Seokjin adds in a whisper.
“A delightful doll, yes,” Hoseok murmurs.
Yoongi sees Seokjin’s jaw clenching.
“But he said his name is Min Yoongi, and you will respect that,” Seokjin murmurs firmly. “If you don't, I'm sorry to say this, but the gates of The Trails will be closed for you,” Seokjin’s voice is almost innocent, there's nearly no harm in it, most people won't believe that he is threatening someone.
Is the devilish sparkle in his eyes what makes Hoseok huff.
“I see how it is,” Hoseok replies.
“I don't want more comments like the ones you made earlier, and I don't want bets like the one you made earlier. I already told you this, leave Yoongi out of our problems, okay?” Yoongi frowns at Seokjin, a bit lost.
Hoseok smiles, it's a bitter smile, but he ends up nodding.
“Enjoy the party,” Seokjin says, finishing with the conversation. “I would love to go but we have other things to do. It was nice seeing you again though.”
Yoongi feels a hand moving down his spine until it stops on the lower part of his back. Seokjin prompts him to walk, leaving Hoseok behind. “Go back home safely, and tell Jiwoo noona I say hi, I haven’t seen her since she left school,” Seokjin murmurs finally, taking Yoongi with him.
They don’t look back at The Trails as they walk to the entrance, but they can feel Hoseok’s eyes still on them until they get into the forest.
Seokjin’s hand is still on Yoongi’s back when they reach the gate. There are many cars lined up on the edge of the street, and a lot of people standing beside said cars. Yoongi looks around, not knowing where to go. He avoids looking up at Seokjin’s eyes, he doesn’t ask where they are going either, he is embarrassed to talk after what happened down there in The Trails.
Seokjin stops next to a black Porsche, “Did you bring your car?” he asks Yoongi, unlocking the driver's door.
“No, Namjoon was supposed to take me home. Is this yours?” he asks in awe, he thought Seokjin moved in bikes only.
“No, it’s Seokjung’s, I take it whenever I’m not riding my bike,” Seokjin explains, walking around it, opening the passenger door. “Cars are not my thing but I can drive anything. Get inside, I’ll drive you to your dorm.”
Yoongi is surprised to hear that he is driving him to the dorm instead of taking him to his apartment as last week.
He doesn’t say anything and gets into the fancy Porsche, waiting for Seokjin to get into the car with him.
They don't talk, everything is silent inside the car, but it feels alright, not as uncomfortable as Yoongi had imagined it would be.
He steals a few glances as Seokjin drives, his profile is quite a sight, like everything else about him.
Being a friend of a man like him must be difficult, Yoongi has only seen him twice and it's enough for Seokjin’s overwhelming attractiveness to make him stutter in his own words.
“Kitten,” Seokjin says suddenly, making Yoongi jump in his seat. “Is it alright if I call you Kitten?”
Yoongi shakes his head, keeping his eyes on the road, “No, but I feel like you will still call me that even if I tell you not to, so I won’t waste my time arguing about it.”
Seokjin laughs loudly then, Yoongi steals a glimpse of his smile too. “You are a wise man, I see.”
“Just make sure not to call me that in front of people, it’s embarrassing.”
Seokjin nods, still laughing. He stops the car at a red light. Yoongi raises his brows in astonishment when he sees him following the traffic rules.
“I wanted to thank you,” Seokjin says shyly, looking at Yoongi. The latter stares at him inquisitively. “For holding my hand earlier, with Jung.”
“Oh, sure,” he replies, not knowing what else to say.
Seokjin sighs, “I know it’s stupid, it’s been a while since that happened and it still affects me, it’s ridiculous. I don’t know what was going through my mind when I told Jung about it, I guess I’m just glad he hasn’t said any of it to other people.”
Yoongi grimaces, “Sorry, you lost me, I don't know what you are talking about.”
“About what Jung said,” Seokjin looks at Yoongi again, but he seems clueless. “About Namjoon taking my boyfriend and me taking his boyfriend, aka, you.”
“Oh, I didn’t understand that part of the conversation at all, you seemed uncomfortable and I thought holding your hand was the right thing to do.”
“What do you mean you didn’t understand?” Seokjin asks, parking the car out of a convenience store. “He was very clear.”
Yoongi shrugs, “Namjoon took your boyfriend? That’s why you hate him?” Seokjin’s confused stare falls on him, “I mean, I’m not trying to sound insensitive but, things like that happen all the time. You break up, your ex-boyfriend finds a new boyfriend, you move on. Isn’t it normal?” Seokjin’s scowl deepens at his words. Yoongi scratches the back of his head. “I mean, I know you two were friends, and I guess it’s a bit fucked up when your friend dates your ex-boyfriend but… is not the end of the world. You know?”
Seokjin scrunches his nose, “I don’t know if you are very open-minded or you just don't know what happened here. I’m confused.”
Yoongi furrows his brows, “What?”
Seokjin giggles, “Well, I guess your friend can fall in love with your boyfriend, it can happen, maybe. However, when you find your best friend and your boyfriend fucking each other then it can be a bit painful, don't you think?”
“What?” Yoongi repeats, getting more confused each second.
“Stepping into a room just to find your boyfriend bent while your best friend bangs him is a bit shocking.”
“No, wait,” Yoongi replies, his brows pinched together now, staring at Seokjin in disbelief. It can’t mean what he thinks it means. “Are you saying that Namjoonie, he–”
“He fucked my boyfriend, Jungkook. Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying,” Seokjin finishes with a firm tone.
Yoongi gapes, genuinely shocked. “Are you sure?” he asks, and he knows it’s a stupid question but for god’s sake, he just found out Namjoon did something this cruel to someone that was his friend. What?
“Yes? I saw them myself. Do you want me to detail the scene for you?” Seokjin asks, baffled.
“No, no, no. God, I sound so stupid, I’m sorry. Uhm, I didn’t know about that,” Yoongi explains as sincerely as he possibly can. “Fuck, I knew something bad had happened between you two but this is beyond my expectations.”
Seokjin hums, “I thought you knew about it.”
“No, no, Namjoon never said anything,” Yoongi murmurs with his head still a mess. “Jungkook, he was the same guy you were making out with at The Trails the other night, right?” Seokjin nods with his head leaned back. “Okay, I guess that’s messed up too but that’s your business.”
Seokjin laughs, “I don’t know why I’m laughing, I usually cry every time I talk about this. I guess seeing you clueless and confused it’s a bit endearing and funny,” he replies with a big sigh, unlocking his seat belt.
Yoongi is still wrapping his head around it, but his hand reaches Seokjin’s shoulder, the older man turns around to face him.
“I’m so sorry they did that to you. I’ve never gone through something like that, but I fell in love once and had to let him go, and it hurt like hell. I can’t imagine how heartbreaking it is to find your partner betraying your love and trust like that. I’m sorry Jungkook did that to you.”
To Yoongi’s surprise, Seokjin’s eyes are sparkling when he finishes speaking, he doesn’t tear up, but the pain is there, in his eyes, and Yoongi has the inexplicable need of wrapping him in a tight hug.
“This is why you told me I was your perfect opportunity for revenge. You thought I was his boyfriend,” Yoongi murmurs in an understanding tone.
Seokjin nods, shrugging. “I wasn’t going to do anything to you, I just wanted to bother him. I know it’s childish, but I needed him to feel a tiny part of the pain he made me feel.”
Yoongi understands him now, this explains the way Seokjin acted with him that first night.
Yoongi won't lie, he was startled when he stepped into The Trails and automatically became the target of a powerful dude he had never seen before.
“It was childish, but I don't judge you. If anything, I would advise you to clear things up with Namjoon, it seems like you are on good terms with Jungkook.”
“I know that's the most obvious conclusion, clear things up, but it's not easy, It’s a fucked up situation,” Seokjin says, and Yoongi nods, silently agreeing with him. “Fuck, I really need a cigarette now.”
Yoongi laughs, looking at him, “Me too,” he says with a dumb smile on his face. “Wait, I think I have a package in my pocket,” he murmurs, digging inside his jacket pocket.
“Oh, don’t worry, I just like the menthol one's.”
“These?” a surprised Yoongi asks, showing Seokjin his package.
“Okay this is weird,” Seokjin laughs, amazed. “Usually, people offer me the normal ones, I hate those, they taste awful and the smell is just gross,” He takes one cigarette with his lips and gives the package back to Yoongi.
Yoongi nods as he lights up his cigarette, stopping before taking the first drag. “Wait, can we smoke inside the car?” he asks with rounded eyes. Seokjin laughs at him, shaking his body.
“Kitten, you can do whatever you want,” he replies easily, sucking the filtered end of the cigarette, lighting it up too.
Soon he takes a drag himself, inhaling the minty smoke, leaning his head back on the seat. “I needed this,” he whispers, more relaxed now.
Yoongi nods, letting the smoke dribble slowly through his mouth.
They slip into silence with the cigarettes between their lips, staring at nothing in particular.
Well, Yoongi’s eyes wander around, landing on Seokjin. But Seokjin is distracted, he doesn’t notice it, he seems to be caught up in his mind, or his memories.
Yoongi doesn’t pity him, but he feels sorry and as ridiculous as it sounds, a bit responsible for his pain too. It was his friend who caused it after all.
He never imagined that Namjoon would have done something so cruel. That Jungkook guy too. Yoongi doesn't really know him, yet he feels a deep rejection towards him.
A few minutes later, Seokjin starts the car again, leaving the convenience store behind, getting into the highway.
When Seokjin asks him what's his dorm’s name, Yoongi’s surprised by his reaction when he mentions the Park’s Dorms.
Yoongi knows his dorm is shit, but he didn't expect such a shocked reaction.
“Who's the dramatic one now?” Yoongi mocks. Seokjin just shakes his head.
“But Kitten, what the hell are you doing living in there? That's not a place for you,” Seokjin murmurs, pouting his lips.
Yoongi automatically sinks into his seat with a pout.
Seokjin’s voice makes him feel small again, but not in a way Yoongi dislikes, it's the opposite.
It feels like Yoongi finally gets to be small, finally able to be vulnerable.
It's been a while since he allowed himself to feel like that around someone.
“It’s not my fault, it's the dorm I got.”
Seokjin shakes his head, he leaves the highway at the first exit, and takes a turn, driving to the opposite side.
Yoongi looks around, “Where are we going?”
“My apartment, you can stay there tonight,” Yoongi is about to argue but Seokjin shakes his head. “I won't drive you to that place this late. I was invited to one of those parties tonight, and I won't let you stay there alone.”
“Namjoon is there too,” Yoongi replies.
“And he is useless–”
“Hey!” Seokjin rolls his eyes. “You won't talk bad about him in front of me, it's wrong.”
“Anyway, you are coming home with me, you can take Seokjung’s bedroom again, he is out of town until the end of the month.”
Yoongi sighs but doesn't fight back. Sleeping on a good mattress on the good side of the city sounds like a vacation.
“This time, you don't need to sneak out in the middle of the night, though,” Seokjin whispers mockingly.
“I didn't sneak out.”
“Well, I knocked on your door first time in the morning and you weren't there, so.”
Yoongi hums, looking at him suspiciously, “Were you looking for me?”
Seokjin shrugs, “I wanted to offer breakfast as a sign of peace, but you escaped, so I guess we are still at war, aren't we?”
Yoongi laughs, leaning his head back. “You can prepare breakfast for me tomorrow morning, if it's good, we will be at peace, for now.”
Seokjin hums, knowing in approval. “That sounds good. Please don't sneak out again,” he repeats, making Yoongi slap his hand.
“I told you I didn't sneak out,” he whines with a pout still on his lip.
Yoongi never whines.
Seokjin smiles at the road, turning his hand and wrapping it around Yoongi’s hand without looking at him.
“I said I didn't sneak out,” Yoongi repeats, distracted, with his eyes on their hands, “I'll be there in the morning, hungry for breakfast so it better be good.”
“It will be good,” Seokjin assures him, stealing a short glance in Yoongi’s direction.
They don't talk to each other after that, but Seokjin doesn't let him go, and Yoongi has no idea of how to feel about it, but he doesn’t take his hand away either.
Seokjin has a push and pull relationship with his emotions. One day he feels in sync with them, but the other he doesn’t understand why his mind and chest feel that way.
It’s confusing but as he grows older, he has learned how to live with it, how to ignore the signals, and act like his heart isn’t beating faster when another hand suddenly wraps around his.
Another thing Seokjin has discovered, even if it's unrelated, is that Min Yoongi has many types of smiles. Yes, too many.
There’s a cautious one, the one he makes when something it’s funny, but he is too shy to laugh openly about it. It was the only smile he would show to Seokjin when they met.
There’s another, the mischievous smile, the one that appears when he gossips around about certain situations he has seen at the campus, and Seokjin would add some extra spice and tell him more details he knows.
There’s another smile, the one he makes when he talks about Kim Taehyung, a name that's starting to become way too familiar to Seokjin’s ears.
That smile is bittersweet for Seokjin, and he has been liking it less and less these last few days.
But then there’s this smile, the one he is making now, and it's beautiful and reckless. Yoongi laughs with his eyes closed, his head leaning back, and his mouth showing off the cutest gum smile Seokjin has ever seen.
His whole body shakes as he holds Seokjin’s hand.
Seokjin didn't know this smile was so scarce, but he does now, and he has learned to appreciate it more every time it appears.
“What’s so funny?” he asks, with fake confusion. “Why are you laughing?”
“You have–” Yoongi starts, but can't keep going.
“Hey, hey, breathe, you will faint,” Seokjin says, trying to keep a straight face, but Yoongi’s laugh is contagious.
“Were you cooking?” Yoongi asks, taking off his shoes, holding Seokjin’s hand for support.
“Something like that, my brother is supposed to come here tonight for dinner, he asked me to prepare pasta.”
Yoongi frowns, “Are you making the pasta? Like the actual noodles?” His question is answered soon when he enters the living room and gets a sight of the messy kitchen.
Seokjin raises his chin, “Impressive, right?”
Yoongi laughs again, turning around to face Seokjin. “Come here big guy, you are an impressive mess indeed,” he whispers, delicately removing some of the flour from his cheeks.
Seokjin closes his eyes and stays still as Yoongi’s thumbs caress his skin. He doesn't remember when Yoongi started feeling comfortable around him, but he likes what he feels, he likes how this gesture comes as second nature, he likes having Yoongi’s attention solely on him.
Maybe it all started a few weeks ago, the night he offered Yoongi his place to study if he needed it. Yoongi declined the offer right away, but then Seokjin offered it again the following morning during breakfast, making sure Yoongi understood how this apartment was empty most of the time. Seokjin’s brother hardly ever visited it and Seokjin spent most of his time at Jaehwan’s place or the gym after classes.
Yoongi ended up accepting, so now finding Yoongi and his textbooks in the living room it’s a common sight. Sometimes Seokjin takes them to Seokjung’s desk in his bedroom, letting Yoongi know he is free to stay there if he needs to pull an all-nighter.
If anyone asked Seokjin why he did all that, he wouldn't know what to answer. He would say something like, he can’t see one of his friends suffering, which is true. However, Seokjin isn’t sure if Yoongi fits into the “friends” category yet.
They don't hang out outside, they don’t even acknowledge each other’s presence when they pass by on campus.
It's like they don’t exist for each other outside these four walls.
But it’s alright, Seokjin wouldn’t change any of it, not when he gets home to Yoongi’s asleep face in his living room, or to Yoongi’s preparing ramyun, always making sure to add an extra portion in case Seokjin is arriving home soon.
Maybe they aren’t friends, but it’s fine.
It's fine.
It’s fine until it isn’t.
It's been a while since the last competition in The Trails, so it's a surprise to receive a call from Jaehwan telling him he needs him at The Trails the following night.
Seokjin has been busy with exam week at University, but there's only one exam left so he accepts to go, making Jaehwan the happiest.
Seokjin is not screaming in excitement, but it feels good to go back.
“Good news?” Yoongi asks. Each of them is sitting across from each other at the opposite ends of the leather sofa.
Yoongi is reading a Russian book which Seokjin has no idea what it is about, while Seokjin is studying his flashcards for his business class.
“Something like that, I'm competing in The Trails tomorrow night, some racers are coming from Busan.”
Yoongi looks up at him, “That Hoseok guy again?”
Seokjin snorts, “No, Jung has a business to run himself,” Yoongi sighs in relief, “Don't worry about him, even if he came, he wouldn't bother you.”
Yoongi shrugs, “As long as he doesn't see me with you, he won't, for sure,” Seokjin frowns, confused. “Come on, you know he’s into you, he was jealous, that's why he came for me. He wanted me out of the way.”
Seokjin laughs, shaking his head, “Kitten, he doesn't want me like that.”
“Everyone wants you like that,” Yoongi replies quietly, with his eyes still on his book pages. Seokjin raises his brow.
“No, not everyone.”
Yoongi snorts, “Tell me one person.”
Seokjin doesn't seem able to contain himself, Yoongi has given him a perfect chance to mess around.
He puts the flashcards aside, crawling across the large sofa, putting himself in between Yoongi’s bent legs. “You,” he whispers, nuzzling his nose across Yoongi’s neck. “I could offer myself entirely to you, and your attention would never leave your book.”
Yoongi doesn't move, looking used to Seokjin’s antics.
“I could kiss you right here,” he whispers, pulling at Yoongi’s earlobe with his teeth, “And you wouldn't reciprocate any of that. You wouldn't even let me kiss you.”
Yoongi clears his throat, putting the book aside. “You know I can’t–”
“I know, I know,” Seokjin replies. “Taehyung.”
“Yes,” Yoongi replies, clearing his throat again. Seokjin rolls his eyes, standing up from the couch. “Why do you roll your eyes? Do you want to kiss me so badly?”
Yes. Seokjin wants to reply, but he shakes his head instead. “I just like messing around with you. You will pay for what you did to me that first night in that kitchen.”
“You will never let me live after it, will you?” Yoongi asks with a grin, standing up and moving to the said kitchen.
“No, you really fooled me, and marked me,” Seokjin clicks his tongue a few times, standing behind Yoongi. “I will mark you one day, and we will be tied,” he warns near his ear, not touching Yoongi at all.
“Sure,” Yoongi replies, taking a big sip of his bottle of water.
“Anyway, I know you hardly ever go to The Trails anymore, but I wanted to know if you wanna come tomorrow night? I can pick you up at your place.”
Yoongi looks surprised at him. “Are you inviting me to support you tomorrow?”
“Is it too strange? Why are you asking it with that voice?”
“What voice?”
“The ‘you have to be kidding me’ type of voice,” Seokjin replies, grabbing a beer from the fridge. Studies are done for the night.
“I'm not using that voice,” Yoongi replies with a giggle. “And yes, I will go. It'll be fun, I haven't been there in weeks. Namjoonie invited me the other day, but I had exams the following Monday so I had to decline.”
Seokjin hums, he knows how busy Yoongi has been. “So that's a yes? Will you be there supporting me?”
“Sure.”
Seokjin smiles, walking around to hug Yoongi from behind, “Thank you, Kitten,” he whispers, kissing his cheek noisily. “I'll make sure you have fun.”
“Will Jungkook be there?” Yoongi asks all of a sudden. Seokjin hums, shrugging. “Jimin broke up with him, I'm sure you heard the news.”
Seokjin sighs, resting his chin on Yoongi’s shoulder. “Yeah, I heard about it.”
“Some of my classmates said they saw you at Jungkook’s dorm last night,” Yoongi adds, turning around, wrapping his arms around Seokjin's waist, looking up at him. “Is everything alright with you?”
“Yeah, I just, I guess I just wanted to tell him that everything is alright. He was sad, and seeing Jungkook sad makes me sad.”
Yoongi hums, “Just be careful, I don't like the way he manipulates you.”
Seokjin nods, eyes closed. “He isn't as bad as you think.”
“Sorry, it's hard to believe that.”
Seokjin focuses his eyes on Yoongi again, sighing deeply. He rests their foreheads together. “Would it be too bad if I gave him a second chance?” he asks, eyes closed again.
“What? Did he have the audacity to ask you to give him a second chance? Does he even know how much he hurt you?”
“Hey, you always say we shouldn't hold a grudge against people.”
“Yes, because it's not healthy to keep that inside of you,” Yoongi replies sharply, pointing his index finger at Seokjin’s heart. “But that doesn't mean you can ignore everything he did. You can forgive him if that's what you want, but you shouldn't put yourself in a situation you are not sure about.”
“How do you know I'm not sure about it? Maybe I want him back.”
Yoongi shakes his head, “If you were sure, you wouldn't have asked me anything and that guy would be here right now instead of me.”
Seokjin groans, bringing Yoongi into a tight hug, “I hate when you use that smart brain of yours,” he kisses his temple before letting Yoongi go. “Fine then, I will tell him my new friend Yoongi told me not to date him again,” Seokjin jokes, receiving a murdering look from Yoongi. It makes Seokjin laugh, “I'm just kidding.”
“I know, just, think about it very well before giving him an answer, okay?” Seokjin nods, sitting back on the sofa, patting the seat beside him for Yoongi. “Promise me you won't just say yes, be wise.”
“There's nothing to think about. This is my time to move on, I already learned, and I'm prepared to find someone new.”
Yoongi nods, sitting legs crossed leaning on Seokjin's shoulder. “First loves are scary, aren't they?”
Seokjin hums, “They are, you feel your heart detached when they are gone, and it feels like they never give it back. Somehow it feels like I got a new heart to replace the one Jungkook stole. Is it possible to have multiple hearts?”
Yoongi smiles softly, looking up at Seokjin. “Totally, you buy them on Amazon, but they are too expensive and constantly out of stock, so be careful with this new one.”
Seokjin looks down at him, “I hate capitalism,” he replies, taking Yoongi’s hand in his.
What did Seokjin say about not being friends with Yoongi? That it was fine?
Ha. Jokes on him.
He has never described himself as a jealous man, but the second he hears Jaehwan mentioning the list of bettors his heart breaks a little.
One thing is seeing Yoongi spending the entire night with Namjoon and his circle of friends, Seokjin knows they are close, he knows he is in a lower range in Yoongi’s list of priorities, and that's not a big deal.
However, his foolish self still hoped for the night to be different, still hoped for Yoongi to acknowledge his presence at least.
It didn't happen.
Now it's time for Seokjin to compete, and Namjoon is on the list with him, the only two competitors from Seoul on the whole list.
This is war.
But while everyone discusses how this arrangement it's a setup, Seokjin can only focus on one thing. Yoongi bet on Namjoon’s favor. He bet on Namjoon’s favor. He went all the way and bet ₩100,000 on his damn favor.
Seokjin purses his lips, shaking his head in disbelief.
He is so stupid.
“Jesus, why do you look so mad? I promise you this wasn't planned by me, they did the arrangement,” Jaehwan whispers in his ear, making Seokjin roll his eyes.
“Believe me, I just want to beat everyone's ass right now, I don't care who made the fucking arrangement,” he replies with a clenched jaw.
Jaehwan tilts his head, surprised. “Okay, that's good, that's the hunger we are looking for.”
Seokjin doesn't react in any way, grabbing his helmet instead, and walking in his motorcycle direction, focusing on doing his job well.
As soon as the flare gun shoots, Seokjin flies away from the starting grid, taking a steady advantage.
He doesn't care about the advantage per se, he just wants to feel alone, he doesn't want to hear anyone’s bike next to him. He wants time for himself and his mind, nothing else.
Thanks to his experience, he is capable of keeping control of his motorcycle even when he accelerates. He knows his baby, his partner in crime, his most loyal friend. He becomes one with it.
And so, in a blink of an eye, he wins.
When his bike finally stops, the adrenaline takes all the bitter feelings away with it, and now the only remaining sentiment inside his chest and mind is an uncomfortable sadness.
Well, that's half the truth.
It's not just sadness, it's betrayal and jealousy running through his body.
He takes off the helmet as he walks back to his circle. Jaehwan is the first one to congratulate him, and the first and only one to notice that something is wrong with Seokjin.
“Hey, Seokjin,” Namjoon murmurs, putting his hand on his shoulder. “That was impressive.”
Seokjin turns around, looking down at the hand on his shoulder with disdain. Namjoon takes it away instantly.
“I know, someone had to do the job in the representation of our University, that's why I'm here.”
Namjoon hums, “Yeah, you did well. More than just well.”
Seokjin nods, not replying anything back.
At the awkward silence, Jaehwan intervenes. “Namjoon-ah, you did well too, you came second, before that Wonyoung asshole, you were amazing.”
“Thank you Jae hyung,” Namjoon replies, “And thank you for inviting me to compete against them.”
“We needed the best duo tonight,” Jaehwan replies easily. Seokjin only stares at the void, hearing them talking at the back of his head.
His attention only is brought back to reality when Yoongi appears in front of his eyes, looking for Namjoon, of course.
“Namjoonie! Tae is calling, he wants to congratulate you,” Yoongi screams with an excited smile, handing his phone to Namjoon.
Seokjin can't see this going further. His job here is done, he won, and now he is gone.
“Hey, hey, hey,” Jaehwan stops him, whispering into his ear. “What's wrong with you? You fucking won! Why aren't you celebrating?”
“Nothing happened, I'm just not in the mood.”
Jaehwan frowns, ruffling Seokjin’s hair as he has always done. “You're lying,” he whispers with a small pout. “Jaehwan gets sad when Seokjinnie lies.”
Seokjin chuckles against his will, he hates it when Jaehwan babies him, especially in front of people. “Shut up, I'll just go. Have fun celebrating, I won for all of you, not just for me.”
“You want me to take you home?”
Seokjin shakes his head, “No, I need time to clear my head.”
Jaehwan’s frown deepens, “Okay, that got me worried, but okay, I'll call you tomorrow.”
Seokjin nods and walks back to his bike, he doesn't put on his helmet this time, and just drives away, he can't stay in The Trails anymore.
“I thought there was going to be a celebration afterward,” Yoongi whispers, distracted by Seokjin’s motorcycle getting lost into the forest.
“Yeah, in your dorm actually,” Namjoon replies with a giggle. “Why?”
“Seokjin left,” Yoongi answers, stupidly waiting for Seokjin to come back. He doesn't.
“Really? Well, he is not party-friendly, he is a bit like you. I'm sure he will celebrate at home–” his words are suddenly cut, Yoongi knows why. Both of them see Jungkook’s motorcycle following Seokjin’s path, leaving The Trails as well. “With a private company,” Namjoon finishes when Jungkook’s bike is out of their vision.
“You think they will celebrate together?” and Yoongi doesn't know why his voice comes out as bitter as it does, but fuck, he wanted to congratulate Seokjin too.
“I don't know, I don't care, it's their mess,” Namjoon murmurs with a sigh, “Taehyungie is preparing a surprise for you,” he murmurs instead.
That brings Yoongi’s attention back to Namjoon. “What?”
“Just prepare yourself, it's a big surprise.”
Yoongi fakes a smile, nodding, but his eyes are drawn back to the forest, confused by Seokjin suddenly leaving.
“I'll drive home now before I lose my spot in the parking lot, it'll be crowded later.”
Namjoon nods, “Sure,” he says, picking up a cigarette with his lips. “I'll see you later, hyung.”
Yoongi waves to the rest of Namjoon’s friends and starts his walk back to the main street, now knowing the path through the forest by heart.
He finds his car, getting inside quickly. He sighs, holding the steering wheel tightly, biting his lip. “Fuck Yoongi, don't do it,” he says to himself, but he knows he will do it either way.
He starts his car with only one destiny in mind. Seokjin’s place.
His ride there is calm and stopped by too many red lights, maybe it's a sign not to go there, but Yoongi ignores them, following what his chest is telling him to do.
He parks the car, nervously. At least all the other times he came here, he was announced before, and Seokjin welcomed him with a smile, or maybe the apartment was empty for him to use.
But tonight he is here unannounced, and he doesn't know how Seokjin will welcome him.
He does see Jungkook’s motorcycle parked next to Seokjin’s, which only makes him more stressed.
Maybe they are busy.
Doing stuff.
Yoongi shakes his head during the whole elevator ride.
Why is he doing this? Huh? He doesn't even have an answer for that.
Well, anything besides Seokjin’s weird expression at The Trails or the way he left without letting Yoongi approach him.
Right, Yoongi is just worried, nothing else.
He knows the password but decides to ring the doorbell instead.
Seokjin opens the door with a surprised expression. “Kitten?”
Good, he called him Kitten, that's a good sign. “Hey, big guy,” Yoongi replies with a smile.
Seokjin doesn't smile back, he purses his lips instead, swallowing. “What are you doing here? I thought you would be celebrating with–”
“With the winner, of course,” Yoongi finishes. “I had to come all the way here, to congratulate you. Why did you leave? I thought you would be coming to my dorm to celebrate with the rest, I would have let you sleep on my bed if you needed it,” Yoongi says, trying to sound funny.
“I wasn't in the mood for parties,” and the way he doesn't reply with something flirty is enough proof that something is indeed wrong.
“What happened? You looked excited yesterday. Is it Jungkook?” he asks, can't hold it back. “I know he is here.”
“How do you know that?”
“His bike is parked down there, and I guess that's why I'm not welcomed inside your apartment this time.”
Seokjin gapes, shaking his head. “I'm not trying to be rude, it's just that, I need to talk to him.”
Yoongi hums, trying not to look too disappointed. Seokjin notices, he tries to reach for his hand but Yoongi shakes his head. “Don't worry, it's just weird. I'll get used to his presence. We will still be friends, right?”
And for a split second, he is suddenly scared that Seokjin will say no. Yoongi has no clue why he feels so attached to his man, they have known each other for a little while only, but if Seokjin says no, something will break.
Perhaps it's because Seokjin has been his first and only friend in this city since he arrived.
But Seokjin nods right away, not letting Yoongi think weird things for too long.
“What about having dinner tomorrow night? Would that be okay?” Seokjin offers. Yoongi agrees, a bit relaxed now. “I have to go back inside now, Jungkook is taking a shower and I–”
“You will take a shower with him,” Yoongi finishes before he can stop himself.
Seokjin laughs, it’s the first time his expression changes since Yoongi saw him at The Trails earlier tonight. “What? No, I'm just going to prepare him some clothes,” he laughs once again, shaking his head. “Your brain is something else.”
Yoongi blushes. “I’ll leave now, I only wanted to congratulate you.”
Seokjin winks, “Thank you for coming all the way here.”
Yoongi winks back, “Sure.”
The last, the very last thing Yoongi imagined happening after their short conversation, was opening the door of his bedroom in the middle of the night, just to find Seokjin on the other side.
The second thing he never saw coming was Seokjin straddling him against his closed door.
“What are you doing here?” Yoongi whispers, taken off guard, he feels the pressure of Seokjin’s thigh separating his own.
“What do you think I'm doing here? Kitten?”
“I don't know?” Yoongi replies, but he does know, he does feel Seokjin kissing his jawline, his teeth pulling at his earlobe, and his nose trailing down the crook of his neck.
“You know I want you, don't you? And you want me too. That's why you visited me tonight, jealous.”
Yoongi sighs. It's weird to hear Seokjin saying it out loud, it's weird because he hasn't accepted it himself yet.
Yes, he was jealous of Jungkook, jealous of him for being there with Seokjin, jealous of him for being able to touch him and kiss him as much as he pleases.
Yoongi wants that too, he really wants him, he wants this.
But he can't share.
“You don't want me?” Seokjin whispers, stepping aside with an unreadable expression, but Yoongi pulls him back to his side by his nape, rubbing their noses together. “You want me.”
“I don't know what I want,” Yoongi whispers. It's true, everything is messed up. “I miss Taehyung, but I feel like I don't miss him the same way anymore.”
Seokjin blinks, wetting his lips. “What about me?”
Yoongi sighs, kissing the tip of his nose, holding his face delicately. “You? I can't stop thinking about you, I can't bring myself to put you away from me.”
Seokjin nods, sliding his hands down his back in a small hug, finding the edge of his sweatshirt, pulling it up slowly. “You won't betray Taehyung if you give me a chance. You are not together anymore.”
“But I made him a promise, this is why my hair is still mint, my promise is still valid, it is for him. I'm waiting for him.”
Seokjin narrows his eyes, pulling the sweatshirt off Yoongi’s body, exposing his bare chest. “Are you really?” he whispers, trailing down Yoongi's chest to his abs, scratching his skin with the tip of his nails. Yoongi shivers.
“You said that first loves takes our hearts, and then we have to replace them. What if I don't want it to be replaced? What if my heart is not detached? Does it mean that I still love him even if it doesn't feel that way?”
Seokjin hums, leaning forward to kiss his chest, right over his heart. Yoongi throws his head back. “What if that means that Taehyung didn't steal it? What if it means that he never owned it?” Seokjin asks in a whisper, kneeling, mouthing down Yoongi’s chest to his abs, kissing his navel, and sliding back up to take one of his nipples between his teeth.
Yoongi pants looking down at him, open-mouthed, caressing his black hair back. He is so beautiful like this, his pouty lips sucking at his chest, making a deep groan escape from the sealed cage where his desire has been trapped all these months.
“You want me, you want this,” Seokjin whispers like a mantra, and Yoongi can't fight against it anymore. It's absurd to fight against it.
“What about Jungkook?”
“I choose you,” Seokjin replies in a heartbeat, “I choose you over anyone else. You are what I need, Yoongi. I want your smart brain scolding me, guiding me. I want your arms wrapped around my waist, I want your lips on mine at every second of the day. I want your entire body to complement mine.”
Yoongi brings him up to his feet, pushing him down to bed, his tiny bed that Seokjin makes look even tinier.
He sits on him, sits on the prominent heat coming from his probably perfect-looking dick, still covered by his jeans.
He hovers over Seokjin’s tiny and angelic face, removing his bangs, just to discover he looks a little more perfect like that.
“Fuck, you could have anyone you want,” Yoongi whispers.
“I want you.”
Yoongi licks his lips, kissing his jawline, as Seokjin’s hands trail down his spine, into the back of his sweatpants, getting his hands inside.
“Kiss me,” Yoongi blurts out.
“Are you sure?” Seokjin asks, Yoongi nods.
“Please.”
“You said I couldn't kiss you, you said you wanted Taehyung. You said kisses were important and you would never give them away.”
Yoongi shakes his head, rocking his hips with more liberty now that he has accepted his fate, Seokjin helps him guide the movements to the right place, moaning into each other's open mouths.
“Kiss me,” Yoongi begs, touching Seokjin’s lips with his.
“Are you sure?”
Yoongi nods, biting his bottom lip, “Please, do it. Kiss me.”
But Seokjin doesn't kiss him, suddenly Seokjin is not even there anymore, Seokjin has never been there, to begin with. The only thing facing Yoongi is darkness and loneliness.
Yoongi opens his eyes to find himself in an embarrassing position, with his mouth gasping for air, panting like he was underwater for hours.
He has the urge to touch himself, disoriented, finding out he is hard and was probably dry jumping against his bed.
“Shit,” he blurts out, bewildered. “No, no, no, no,” he repeats over and over again, still with his chest feeling heavy and out of breath.
It hurts, it hurts to come back to reality still remembering every single word in his dream as if they were real.
He looks around feeling lost, lonely, and horny. And he needs to take care of the last one right away before he goes insane.
He doesn't remember waking up hard since he was a teenager, and he doesn't remember having a dream so real that he could still hear the other person’s voice inside his head.
Is he really going nuts?
He sits on his bed when his breathing pace is back to normal, his brows remain pinched together, and his mind keeps recalling Seokjin’s voice saying all those words.
Words that were created solely by Yoongi.
Words that Yoongi has been too much of a coward to affront.
This is it.
The words have escaped in this horrendous way, and now he can't keep acting like he doesn't mean every single of those words.
It's time.
It's time to move on.
It's time to say goodbye to the mint hair that has accompanied him all these months.
It's time to fight for what he wants without a drop of guiltiness because there's nothing to be guilty about.
“Jin-ah, did you hear the news?” Jaehwan asks as soon as Seokjin opens the door. Walking past a confused and sleepy Seokjin.
“What news? And why are you here? You should be at your place, dying with a hangover.”
“It’s noon, I already died and resuscitated.”
Seokjin groans in response.
“Anyway, Taehyung is here!” Jaehwan informs with a small scream, opening the fridge, grabbing a jar of juice.
Seokjin blinks, still looking at his blurred friend. “What? What Taehyung? What are you even talking about?” he asks, yawning and stretching his body.
“Uhm, Kim Taehyung? Namjoon’s brother?”
“What?” Seokjin replies, not sure if he heard right.
The familiar name he has been hearing for months was now being mentioned by his closest friend.
Yoongi’s boyfriend is here?
“He will be at The Trails tonight, Namjoon just told me. The guys from Busan will be there too, maybe they are hungry for another massacre. You have to compete, okay? It's not an option, we don't have Namjoon this time, he won’t compete against his brother.”
Seokjin stopped listening to his friend the second he mentioned Taehyung's name.
He sits on the kitchen stool, staring straight at the minutes going up in the microwave.
How unlucky can a person be? Just the second he decides to let Jungkook go, after everything that had happened, choosing to risk it all and be honest with Yoongi, his boyfriend returns? Seriously?
“Earth to Seokjin? Hello?”
Seokjin shakes his head, defeated. “I can't win against him,” he groans, hiding his face behind both of his hands.
Jaehwan blinks, “Hey, it's alright. I know he is a professional racer but you are just as good, the only reason you don't compete professionally is that you don't want to, but you did classify.”
Seokjin looks at him, exhaling through his nose. “I'm not talking about that, dumbass. I don't care about a stupid competition.”
Jaehwan snorts, “What is this about then? Enlighten me, because I don't understand. You have been acting very weird recently.”
Seokjin shakes his head, “I'm talking about Yoongi, I can't win.”
“Yoongi is competing? I didn't know he knew how to ride–”
“Oh God, can you shut up?” Seokjin blurts out, exploding. “I mean Yoongi, him, I can't win Yoongi's heart if I'm competing against Taehyung. I will always come second, okay? I like this guy, and he is my number one, but it doesn't matter, because for him I'm second, or third, or tenth, never first!”
Jaehwan blinks in his direction, perplexed, confused, stunned.
Seokjin sighs, shaking his head, hiding his face behind his hands again.
“There's a lot to unpack there. I'm assuming Yoongi is not Namjoon’s boyfriend but Taehyung’s?” Seokjin nods, not facing him. “And I'm also assuming that you like Yoongi? Like you want to date him kind of liking?”
Seokjin sighs deeply, facing his friend with puppy eyes. “I really feel the greatest with him, but it's so hard to have him. He will never choose me over Taehyung.”
“Jinnie,” Jaehwan whines cutely, wrapping one arm around him. “I’m so happy to hear you being so fiercely into someone. Jungkook is in the past, isn't he?”
Seokjin slightly nods, leaning onto his friend’s hug. “It was time.”
“It was, I'm so happy for you.”
Seokjin shrugs, “It's not like I have better options here, the man I want is taken, and I would never put myself in between.”
Jaehwan shakes his head, “It’s fine Jinnie. Listen, one day you will find someone perfect for you, to complement the amazing person you already are, and that man will be lucky. I'm so glad you are allowing yourself to find that again.”
Seokjin groans, “That person is Yoongi, he fits perfectly in my life, this is the worst-case scenario I would have ever imagined. Are you sure Taehyung is back?”
“Yeah, Namjoon told me. I'm sorry this is bad timing, but I don't want you to be sad. Moving on from someone you were so stuck with is a good reason to keep this charming chin raised. Don't be sad, buddy. Please. You’ll make me sad too,” his pout is cute, but if he keeps talking in that baby tone he will make Seokjin cry.
“I hate you so much,” Seokjin replies, leaning a bit closer to his side.
Seokjin adores Jaehwan with all his heart. He will never stop thanking him for staying by his side after everything that happened.
“Thank you for your words,” Seokjin whispers at the end.
“Well, you make rich, I have to keep you happy,” he says jokingly, Seokjin pushes him away with a smile.
“Get out of my apartment.”
“Sure, I just came here to steal a glass of juice, never asked you to tell me your whole love crisis, you need friends,” Seokjin laughs when Jaehwan ruffles his hair, patting his back with a fond and stupid smile.
He is a great friend, and Seokjin is lucky to have him.
“I'll see you tonight,” Seokjin murmurs as Jaehwan leaves his apartment.
A deep exhale leaves his lungs when he is alone again. He is so fucked up he doesn't know where to start.
Going to The Trails tonight feels different than any other night before. It feels life-changing, it feels like something exceptional is about to happen.
Is it because he closed a chapter with Jungkook last night? Maybe it is, maybe that's the reason he feels so lightweighted tonight.
The wind hits Seokjin’s face, not freezing his bones as usual, this time it’s more enjoyable.
He takes a few extra minutes to stand there. He leans his head back staring up at the big moon painting the sky tonight.
It's been a while since he took a few minutes to calm himself like this before a race, closing his eyes, hearing the wind creating a melody with the trees.
The first time he visited this place, he was a toddler, guided by his father’s hand.
The old man always let his hand go, always let Seokjin run freely through the wildness of the forest. The Trails have always been a place to face his fears, always surrounded by dad, uncles, and friends.
Now they are not here anymore, but he still has this particular place in the middle of the forest, right where his name it's carved in the tree trunk.
He traces the hidden mark with a big sigh.
So it's alright, he has this.
He encourages himself to step into The Trails, either he loses or wins tonight, it’s still fine. This place is his home, and none of the strangers inside will ever change it.
His chin is raised when he steps into the open space, his arms are crossed, and just like every other night, most of the people turn around to steal a glimpse of him as soon as he appears.
The very first thing Seokjin’s eyes find tonight is Jung Hoseok’s jacket. The man is standing on the front side, smoking a cigarette and chatting with other racers from Busan, the ones Seokjin beat yesterday.
Seokjin didn't know he was going to be here tonight.
The second surprise of the night is finding Jungkook openly talking with Namjoon on the other side of the parking lot.
Seokjin knows he has moved on the moment he looks at them not feeling hurt anymore.
He is also happy to see that his conversation with Jungkook helped the younger man to move forward. Now he doesn't hide himself to talk to the people he wants, and he looks relaxed, Namjoon mirrors his expression.
It's good to see them communicating after the conversation he had with Jungkook last night. Seokjin had never seen Jungkook crying so hard before.
He sighs, moving his eyes away, trying to spot Jaehwan. To Seokjin’s astonishment, he finds his friend and Jimin sharing a beer.
He had never seen them talking before, and he won't assume things, Jaehwan is just an amazing friend to have around, if Jimin considers him one, then good for him.
He crosses his arms, wandering around without much thought, stopping only when his eyes meet some familiar cat-shaped eyes.
However, he has to double-take this time, a bit startled at seeing that Yoongi’s mint hair is absolutely gone.
His hair is black now.
Seokjin wasn't prepared for this, Yoongi looks one thousand times more breathtaking than before.
His pale skin contrasts his black hair so drastically that he looks like a walking angel in the middle of the crowd.
Yoongi stares back at him, not tearing his eyes apart once. But Seokjin does tear his eyes apart, falling on the arm wrapped around his waist, possessively, keeping him steady over the white Yamaha he is sitting on.
Seokjin has never seen that motorcycle before.
They have always acted like the other doesn't exist outside Seokjin’s apartment, Yoongi probably wouldn't mind if Seokjin ignores him the rest of the night.
So that's what he does, he purposely avoids looking in his direction the whole night, not failing once, no matter how hard it gets.
Jaehwan is his lifesaver tonight, he is committed to helping Seokjin in his task and stays by his side like a bodyguard the whole night.
When the time for the competition comes, Seokjin has to obligate himself not to peek at the list of bettors this time, he wouldn't handle seeing Yoongi betting on Taehyung’s favor. This is being hard enough already.
Unlike other nights, he is pressured to win this time, he feels the heavyweight on his shoulders from the crowd screaming at him.
There's only one representative for each city, Seokjin competes for Seoul, Kim Taehyung for Daegu, and Jung Hoseok for Busan.
People record them as they enter the speedway, ready to share pictures and videos on social media.
“Fighting, Seokjin hyung!” Seokjin hears suddenly. The familiarity of that voice makes him turn his head to the crowd.
Just as he suspected, he finds Jungkook screaming for him on the first row of the barricade. He hasn't done that since they were dating. It does make Seokjin smile. Jungkook makes cute hearts in his direction.
Namjoon is right behind him, laughing and shaking his head, covering his dimpled smile.
For a minute it feels like going back in time, seeing them there, supporting him in the first row.
Seokjin shakes his head, focusing his eyes on the road instead. Breathing in, breathing out, breathing in, breathing out. He hasn't felt like this in a while, so pressured to the point his heart is beating out of his chest.
It's good to feel this way, it reminds him why he loves street races so intensely.
The flair gun shoots and the three of them start at a concerning speed, head to head with each other.
Seokjin has to be wiser this time, he has seen Taehyung competing before, and is familiarized with Hoseok’s technique. Both are dangerous, the three of them lack and ace certain skills that make them gain and lose advantage.
Kim Taehyung is an expert at curves, he takes them gracefully, making them look easy. Seokjin gets right behind him at the first curve, but he was expecting it, so he doesn't get desperate.
Jung Hoseok is an expert at overtaking his opponents, he switches tracks fiercely, making the other competitors slow down. He is so good he ends up head to head with Taehyung.
Seokjin is third at some point, but right at the second curve, Hoseok gets back to his initial position. Seokjin doesn't scream in victory but is relieved to be second again.
He makes sure to keep a short gap between him and Taehyung for the rest of the race, and unlike other times, he keeps an eye on Hoseok too, who’s following close behind.
Seokjin succeeds at not losing the second spot ever again, preparing the scenario until his forte comes.
Something Seokjin has aced since the first time he rode a bike, is self-control, and speed control.
He knows when to slow down, but he can also measure the distances and wind force very quickly, calculating how suicidal is to take the step further and reach that scary speed potential that makes most racers lose control of their bikes.
As soon as the last curve comes, Seokjin prepares himself to overtake Taehyung at a dangerous speed, and with that, he shows off why he is known and respected in this place, and how a person doesn't need a stupid title and trophies to overtake an opponent and win.
He needs nothing but discipline and concentration, those two factors make him lead until the end, winning with the greatest advantage of the night.
He hears people screaming in horror and excitement when he wins, driving past them at a risky speed. However, against popular belief, he doesn't crash against the upcoming curve at the end of the circuit.
He practically hears the whole crowd gasping in relief at the same time.
When he finally stops, he discovers that his heart is almost falling off his chest.
He breathes in and out a few times patting his motorcycle.
“Good job baby, you did well,” he whispers as if his bike could listen to his praise. “You did well too Seokjin-ah.”
He removes the face shield, and takes a deep breath, driving back to the starting grid where everyone is gathered together.
He is welcomed with screams, Jaehwan is already waiting for him in the speedway with open arms. Seokjin laughs at him, but his laugh is quickly interrupted.
His expression completely falls, broken.
If Seokjin didn't know he had fallen for Yoongi already, then he knew it now.
His eyes land on Taehyung by accident, on the way he is wrapping his arms around Yoongi’s waist as they kiss for everyone to see. Yoongi’s hands are still on his opened face shield, like he just ran into the speedway, opened the face shield, and kissed his boyfriend without a caress in the world.
And Seokjin looks at them the same way everyone else does. He knew it, he knew that he would never come first against Taehyung.
He puts his face shield back on, letting Jaehwan guide him back to their spot.
Suddenly, the attention is back on him, everyone chants for him, offering high fives.
Seokjin feels like a celebrity, but the pressure in his chest remains there.
Namjoon and Jungkook are already in his circle when he arrives, Seokjin doesn't say anything friendly to them, but doesn't threaten them to leave either.
At the end of the day, Namjoon used to be part of this group in the past, and he still fits perfectly with the rest.
“You beat my brother,” Namjoon says a few minutes later. Catching Seokjin by himself. “Somehow I'm not surprised, I always told you that you should be competing professionally like our brothers.”
“Taehyung is good, I'm sure he would have won if I had made one little mistake. We were tied.”
Namjoon chuckles, shaking his head, “Unless that mistake left you on the floor, then no, you could have still won. You should give yourself more credit.”
Seokjin chuckles, taking off his gloves. “Shouldn't you be congratulating your brother?”
Namjoon shakes his head, laughing. “He has good company already, I'm sure he prefers to spend time alone with Yoongi hyung without me on the way.”
Seokjin laughs too, pained.
“Hyung! You did so well!” Jungkook screams, taking him off guard with a back hug. Seokjin chuckles, accepting the hug, he needed one.
Jungkook seems to notice something is wrong because he tightens his arms and stays glued to his back for a few more minutes.
“We are moving to the Park’s dorm to celebrate,” Jaehwan informs.
Seokjin’s jaw clenches, the last thing he wants is to go there.
“What if we go to my apartment? Our group I mean.”
Jaehwan blinks, “What? Really?”
“Yeah, so we can celebrate better.”
That seems like great news to everyone, going to Seokjin’s apartment is a big deal indeed.
Jungkook is automatically included in the list along with the rest of their friends, and Jaehwan stutters before inviting Namjoon but Seokjin sighs and discretely nods at his friend for him to know that it's alright.
Another person included is Hoseok, Seokjin can't deny him an invitation, he did well in the competition and hasn't been a pain in his ass.
That's how they wrap the night, or that's what Seokjin thought, only to feel a hand on his elbow when he is about to leave.
The Trails are cleared by now, just a few people remain in the place. Seokjin turns around, surprised by the hand holding him, only to get more surprised when he finds himself face to face with Kim Taehyung.
“Hey, I think we need to talk,” The younger man says.
“About what, exactly?” Seokjin asks with narrowed eyes, freeing his arm from his hold. “I don't know you.”
“But you know my boyfriend,” Taehyung replies. His gaze is sharp and hostile. He isn't here to waste his time. “You are Kim Seokjin, the guy that decided to target my boyfriend. I think I know you very well, and not for good reasons.”
Seokjin clenches his jaw. First of all, Yoongi is his ex-boyfriend, secondly, that's between Yoongi and him. Who does this dude think he is?
“Listen, kiddo, I cleared that misunderstanding with Yoongi, and I don't see him here, so this conversation is irrelevant.”
Taehyung shakes his head, clicking his tongue.
Seokjin doesn't want trouble, especially with Taehyung knowing how much he means to Yoongi, he doesn't want to ruin his night.
But Taehyung is looking at him with that familiar shade of hunger in his eyes. Hunger for a fight, hunger for revenge. He lost the race to the man that “harassed” his boyfriend. Seokjin understands how he feels.
“I don't want trouble, I'm sure Yoongi is having a good time with you here, he missed you a lot, so don't waste your time with me and go spend time with him.”
Taehyung snorts, “Who even are you? You don't know anything about my boyfriend or me, shut the fuck up.”
“Hey,” Seokjin replies with a warning tone. He has been nice, but he won't tolerate this disrespectful brat much longer. “What do you want to finish with all this? I have a party to attend.”
Taehyung narrows his eyes, “You like him, don't you?”
“What?”
“You like Yoongi hyung,” Tahyung repeats, but this time it’s not a question. His jaw is clenched, Seokjin sees his whole body tensing. “I can't let you have him, he is mine.”
“That's not up to you, and he isn't yours, he is free to choose what's the best for him. And don't bother, I would never get in between you two if that's what he wants.”
Taehyung huffs, getting his hand inside his pocket, grabbing something. He shows off the keys in the palm of his hand.
“I don't want your bike,” Seokjin replies immediately, turning around and walking away. He won't compete against him again.
“But you want my man!” Taehyung screams.
Seokjin sighs, stopping walking, turning back to face Taehyung. “I know you are mad, Taehyung, but stop now before things get bad here. I'm not that patient.”
“Come on, don't be a coward, you know what I want,” Exactly, Seokjin knows what he wants, and that means Yoongi’s night will be fucked up again, and Seokjin won't be an accomplice of that.
Seokjin shakes his head again, “I won't let you bet Yoongi in a race,” he says firmly.
Taehyung chuckles, “If is not with you, I will ask that Hoseok guy, I know he will be interested too. That asshole.”
Seokjin gapes at him. “Would you do that? Really?”
“Im not afraid, I know I can beat any of you.”
“I just won-”
“Because I let you win,” Taehyung interrupts, there's a mischievous smirk.
“Why would you even do that?”
“Because my boyfriend likes when I do charity, he has a kind soul, and he saw how stressed you were. He is good isn't he?”
Seokjin blinks at him, not wanting to believe him, but doing it either way. Would Yoongi ask this dude to do something like that?
“What do you say now?” he asks, raising the keys again.
Seokjin doesn't know why he nods, but he does.
“The one that wins, takes Yoongi and the bike,” Taehyung offers and Seokjin doesn't care at this point, he walks back and seals the deal shaking Taehyung's hand.
The Trails is empty now, but somehow that makes this so much better. However, he texts Jaehwan to come back, they need him to shoot the flare gun.
“Are you out of your mind?” is the first thing Jaehwan screams when he appears into The Trails again, “Dude, I thought you cut this crap?”
“It was not up to me,” Seokjin replies, adjusting his leather jacket. “Wait, what are they doing here?” he asks, catching Jimin, Jungkook, and Namjoon entering too. “I told you not to tell anyone, do you not know how to read?”
Jaehwan scoffs, helping Seokjin to put his gloves on. “Well, I was having a very nice make-out session with a very sexy blond guy when you interrupted me. I was not going to leave Jimin alone up there.”
Seokjin scrunched his nose at the words, “You didn't need to be so explicit. I don't like the image of you making out with Jimin, he is pure and beautiful, and you are… well… You.” Jaehwan smacks his shoulder. “And by the way, I hope you were not making out with Namjoon and Jungkook as well, why are they here?”
Jaehwan rolls his eyes, “I didn't tell them anything, that was Taehyung probably.”
“Well, I hope no one else comes.”
“Yeah, let's hope no one else comes.”
Meanwhile, Yoongi is sitting inside his car, waiting for Taehyung’s bike to appear from the end of the street, but it doesn't happen. It has been around twenty minutes and he hasn't appeared yet.
Yoongi waits patiently, smoking a cigarette, trying to relax.
It has been such a long night, such a long day.
Why does it feel like he is breaking up with Taehyung again? They already did it months ago, but it always felt like a stop, not an end.
This time feels different, this time feels like Yoongi will tell him goodbye. This time feels like it's forever.
He doesn't regret it, he is confused but doesn't regret it. Honestly, he is excited to close this chapter and move forward.
And then there's Seokjin, who Yoongi needs to talk to so desperately since last night, and still hasn't had the chance to do so.
He looked so nervous tonight, Yoongi would have wanted to hold his hand, whisper encouraging words in his ears.
But Seokjin ignored him entirely.
He sighs, even his cigarette reminds him of him.
Suddenly, from the corner of his eye, he catches something unusual. The street is almost empty, only a couple of familiar faces are still there doing stuff.
So he notices when one of those few people, Jaehwan, runs into the forest all of a sudden, closely followed by Jimin.
Yoongi frowns, that's weird.
Just then, he sees Namjoon suddenly getting off of his motorcycle and running back as well.
Yoongi’s frown deepens. “What is happening?” He asks himself.
He also catches Jungkook getting off Namjoon’s Ducati and following him back inside too.
The only ones that remain on the street are a small group of friends, some of the guys from Busan.
Hoseok is there, staring at the gates as the guys disappear inside the forest one by one. He looks as perplexed as Yoongi himself.
“What the fuck,” Yoongi asks himself again.
He steps out of his car and slowly walks back into The Trails too, following the rest of the guys.
This time the path through the forest takes ages. He sighs to The Trails, confused.
When he steps into The Trails, he curses again when he finds Taehyung getting into position in the starting grid.
He gets a bit more shocked when he recognizes Seokjin’s jacket right next to him.
Yoongi’s heart skips a beat.
“What the fuck are they doing?” a new voice murmurs next to Yoongi, but he is not talking to him, Hoseok is just thinking out loud.
He walks past Yoongi, and the latter feels stupid for staying there like a statue watching how Jaehwan raises the flair gun and shoots it up to the sky.
Seokjin and Taehyung are gone in the split of a second.
Yoongi runs to the barricade, directly where Namjoon is, gaping in vain because no words come out.
“I tried to tell him not to do it, he didn't listen,” Namjoon explains before Yoongi asks him anything.
“You promised me you wouldn't tell him anything about the bets. This wouldn't be happening if you kept your mouth shut!” Yoongi replies in a hard scream.
He should have known Taehyung was sending him away to do this.
“He already knew! I just told him because he wanted to hear what happened from me too!”
“You should have told me then!”
They drive past the barricade again, bringing Yoongi’s attention back to them, with his air stuck in his lungs, not coming out.
Both of them are good, exceptionally good, but Yoongi can't help but root for Seokjin. It's not on purpose, his heart just makes a little jump every time he surpasses Taehyung.
It's a weird feeling like he is choosing, even when he doesn't want to.
Seokjin is leading now, but it doesn't last too long, right near the ending, Taehyung switches tracks, deviating Seokjin out of the speedway and eventually making him fall off his motorcycle.
“Seokjin!” Jaehwan screams before anyone else, running in his direction. Namjoon jumps over the barricade, Jungkook imitates him but Yoongi takes a little longer to follow them.
When he reacts again, he runs to the circle of people covering Seokjin. Before he can get there, Taehyung grabs his forearm.
“Hyung, I think we should go.”
Yoongi blinks at him, shaking his head but not replying anything back. He turns around trying to get a glimpse of Seokjin, and notices he is already up and walking furiously in their direction. He doesn’t even acknowledge Yoongi’s presence, his target is Taehyung.
“What the fuck was that?” He screams, but before he can touch Taehyung, Namjoon stops him, holding him back. “Let me go!”
“Calm down!” Namjoon replies in the same tone. He is the only tall and wide enough to stop Seokjin.
“Did you see what he did?!”
Namjoon nods, “I know, I’ll talk to him later, now calm down!”
Yoongi stares back and forth not knowing what to do, he feels useless.
“Next time keep your eyes open,” Taehyung replies, and Yoongi gapes at him.
“Tae, stop!”
Seokjin huffs, freeing himself from Namjoon’s hold. “Here!” He throws his keys, they fall on the pavement “You can keep it, I don’t fucking care,” before he turns around, he pays Yoongi a short and fierce look, making Yoongi regret things he doesn’t even understand.
“Seokjin,” He whispers, but it’s in vain, Seokjin walks away from them, and Taehyung doesn't remove the hard grip on his hand, so Yoongi can’t follow him.
Once Seokjin is gone, Namjoon picks up the keys from the floor, but Jungkook takes them away from him in a heartbeat. “You can’t have this.”
Taehyung sighs, “Are you his friend?” he asks the younger one.
“Sort of.”
Yoongi scoffs, freeing himself from Taehyung’s hand, “No, he is not,” he answers, walking to Jungkook and taking the keys away from his hand, putting them in his pocket instead.
No one in here is going to ride that motorcycle.
Jungkook snorts, “You don’t even know who I am. You don’t even know Seokjin hyung! Give me the keys, I won’t let any of you have them, no after what your dear boyfriend did.”
“He isn’t my boyfriend,” Yoongi replies in one short breath. “And you know nothing about me either, so shut up, kiddo.”
Taehyung clears his throat. “Let him take the keys, I don’t want that bike, he can drive it back to its owner.”
Yoongi shakes his head, crossing his arms. The way he looks at Taehyung it’s clear that this is his final word, and Taehyung knows better than to argue against that.
“I won’t leave without those keys,” Jungkook replies. “Hyung never lets anyone ride that bike, and none of you are the exception. I’ll park it here and he will pick it up tomorrow. Now give me the keys.”
Yoongi blinks at his words, recalling Seokjin voice, “You should be thankful I’m willing to drive you, no one beside me is allowed to ride my baby. You are just a very tiny exception.” Right. A very tiny exception.
“Well, that sounds good. Seokjin won this motorcycle against his brother, it has special value for him,” Namjoon adds. “All of us know how important it’s the connection we have with our bikes. We should respect that.”
Taehyung shrugs, “I don’t care what you guys do with the damn bike, I just want to get out of here and have a drink.”
Yoongi can’t even look in Taehyung’s direction anymore. He can’t believe he provoked all this mess behind his back.
“Go ahead, I’ll follow right behind,” he replies.
Taehyung frowns, “You won’t come with us?”
Yoongi nods, “I said I will, but on my car so go ahead, I’ll see you there.”
“I can drive you back to the-”
“Taehyung, I really need time to clear my head now. I can’t believe you did all of this!” He finally explodes. He doesn’t raise his voice much, but even this type of outburst is strange for Taehyung, it’s clear in his eyes. “Please go ahead, I’ll be there later. I don’t want to fight with you tonight,” He doesn’t have more space in his head to focus on something that’s not Seokjin and the pain in his eyes.
“What about the keys?” Jungkook insists. Yoongi sighs through his nose.
“Namjoon-ah, take him out of my sight before I lose the little patience I have left,” Yoongi replies scratching the back of his head.
“Yes, hyung.”
Jungkook tries to argue back but Namjoon whispers something into his ear and calms him down.
Yoongi doesn’t know what did he say to him, but when they meet eyes again, Jungkook stares at Yoongi with a sour expression, like he wants to beat him, but at the same time, wants to be his friend.
Weird.
Once he is finally alone, he takes Seokjin’s keys out of his pocket and observes them in silence.
They are familiar, he has seen them countless times at Seokjin’s apartment. He sighs deeply, putting them back into his pocket.
He walks back to where the motorcycle is lying on the floor, picking it up, and picking up the helmet as well, putting it on.
“Okay, Tiny Exception, let's see if you remember how to drive this,” He murmurs to himself, sitting on it with his hands sweating.
He can do this.
Seokjin is drying his hair when his doorbell rings. It’s nearly two in the morning, who would even ring on his door? He walks to the security camera panel in the living room, choosing the entrance door, and is shocked to see his helmet covering the screen. He frowns, leaving the towel behind.
He walks to the door, not knowing what to expect, and opens it with a hard scowl.
“Hey,” a familiar voice says, opening the face shield at once. It’s Yoongi, with his marshmallow cheeks squeezed. “I can’t take this off.” Seokjin blinks at him, and Yoongi blinks at him, and both stare at each other in silence, not moving at all.
Yoongi tears his eyes apart first, trailing them down, blinking at Seokjin’s exposed chest. “You open the door shirtless? You are a confident man, I see.”
Just then Seokjin notices he is still shirtless, he blushes and covers himself with his arms. Is not like he is embarrassed to show his body off, but it always depends on the circumstances, right now it’s a bit awkward.
“I was taking a shower,” he replies, still a bit shocked by Yoongi’s presence. He snaps out of his own embarrassment and walks closer, unlocking the helmet and taking it off his head. Once again, he is surprised to see Yoongi’s black hair. He wants to touch it but contains himself.
“Thank you,” Yoongi whispers when the helmet is not on his head anymore. “I brought your baby home,” he informs, showing the key to Seokjin.
Okay, this takes the prize as the most shocking thing Seokjin has heard all night. Yoongi did what?
“You brought my bike home?” Yoongi nods, “You drove it?” Yoongi nods again. “And you knew how to drive it?”
“Well, yes? Otherwise, I would be in a hospital now.”
Seokjin exhales, impressed. “I didn’t know you knew how to drive a motorcycle,” he whispers, taking the key in his hand.
“I’m a man of many talents,” Yoongi replies, fidgeting in his spot.
Honestly, Seokjin doesn’t know what to do. How is he supposed to approach him? Just thinking about being in a closed space with Yoongi hurts.
His head still replays the kiss with Taehyung at The Trails, it’s hard to look at his lips now.
Life is so unfair.
Seokjin wants Yoongi, which is not something he can hide for much longer. Keeping the friendly charade makes more damage than good.
Seokjin knows he is still in time to move on, to erase Yoongi from his mind and life and never see him again. But as soon as the thought crosses his mind, he regrets thinking about it.
He sighs, moving aside, letting Yoongi step in.
“Where’s your mint hair?” He can’t avoid asking.
Yoongi hums, taking off his shoes, not looking up at him. “Gone, and it won’t come back,” He replies in a lower tone than usual. He breathes out before turning around, facing Seokjin again. “Why? Is my black hair too ugly?”
Seokjin shakes his head, he knows he should laugh it out, like a joke. But neither of them seems in the mood for jokes.
“You look beautiful all the time, it doesn’t matter what’s the color of your hair,” He raises his hand, on his way to touch it, but takes his hand back again. He can’t touch Yoongi, not when his intentions are not pure, not when Yoongi has a boyfriend waiting for him somewhere in this big city. Seokjin won’t be that guy. “What are you doing here, Kitten?”
Yoongi looks down at the helmet hanging from Seokjin’s hand. “I wanted to bring your bike home. You said no one was allowed to ride it, you said that I was a tiny exception. I don’t know if it’s still valid, but I felt like it was my duty to bring it back.”
Seokjin leans his head back, staring at the ceiling, looking for strength. He can’t keep up with Yoongi’s sweetness, he can’t hear him being good to him, he can’t act like he doesn’t melt whenever Yoongi is there, breathing the same air as his, inches away from him, without being able to hold him.
Suddenly, he feels two arms wrapping around his waist, and lips kissing his bare chest, right over his heart.
Seokjin looks down, startled, confused. Yoongi looks up into his eyes.
There’s nothing left to say, despite having countless questions and confession stuck in the tip of his tongue. It doesn’t seem to matter, Yoongi is looking at his lips, and Seokjin recognizes the desire.
He tries to hold himself back before ruining it because there’s Taehyung somewhere; because his heart has been broken like this before; because he can’t become the kind of person he has despised for so long.
“You don’t want this?” Yoongi asks in a whisper after a few seconds. “Did I read all the signs wrong? Really?”
Seokjin doesn’t know what to say, he kisses his forehead instead. “I can’t do this, not like this. I can’t.”
Yoongi bites his lip, with his head down, “God, this is so embarrassing.”
Seokjin shakes his head, cupping his cheeks, making him look back at him. “I promise you I would erase all my morals for you if I could. I desire you so much, Kitten. I’ve dreamed with your lips on mine since the first time they touched my skin.” His mouth is dangerously close to Yoongi’s, nearly touching his lips at every word he says. “But my brain stops me all the time. Call me stupid if you want but I won’t turn into someone that hurts another person for pleasure.”
Yoongi narrows his eyes, sliding his hands down Seokjin’s chest as they walk backward. Seokjin guides them to the living room, but Yoongi shifts their direction, taking Seokjin to his bedroom instead.
“What do you think I’m doing here, Seokjin?” he asks, closing the door when they are inside.
Seokjin seats on his bed, facing the door, facing Yoongi resting his back on the door, facing Yoongi taking his jacket off. He swallows.
“I truly don’t know,” Seokjin whispers drily.
Yoongi takes off his t-shirt, revealing his pale skin to Seokjin, who inhales sharply on his bed. “I’m not here for sex.”
“Then why are you undressing?” Seokjin replies, and honestly, he is not complaining. He is curious.
“Because I want to hug you, but I want to feel you this time,” the younger man replies, walking closer to Seokjin. The latter doesn’t reply this time, but he pats his lap, inviting Yoongi to sit there, and he does, wrapping his arms around Seokjin’s wide shoulders, hiding his face on the crook of his neck. Seokjin wraps his arms around him, kissing his temple. “I like this feeling.” Yoongi blurts out, his voice is muffled by Seokjin’s skin.
“What feeling?”
“When you make me feel small and protected. It makes me uncomfortable when people look at me and treat me as if I was weak or inferior. I learned how to stand up for myself, too scared to look weak in any form. But then you hold me or talk to me in that particular tone that I adore, and I can’t bring myself to want to feel big again, I don’t want to be big all the time, I want to be vulnerable too, and I can be it with you.”
Seokjin keeps quiet, caressing his back as he speaks.
God, he would do anything for Yoongi. He really would.
“I’m confused,” Seokjin whispers, distancing Yoongi from his neck to lock their eyes. “Your words make me feel confused. They make me feel like, like, you want me.” He says shyly. “But then you ignore me or go around kissing your boyfriend in front of me, and your boyfriend tries to kill me in your honor, and it feels like a twisted game that I don’t know how to play.”
Yoongi hums, frowning. “First of all, I don’t have a boyfriend,” he replies firmly. Seokjin’s brain collapses a little at his words. He doesn’t? “Secondly, you are the one ignoring me. These past two nights I was trying to catch your attention, join your group of friends, or anything, but you ignored me completely.”
“Let’s go back to the ‘I don’t have a boyfriend’ part,” Seokjin whispers, shifting their position. He lies a surprised Yoongi down on his bed. “Taehyung made it sound like you two were back together,” Seokjin breathes out, his lips following the sharp path of his jawline, mouthing over his soft skin.
Maybe the war is not as lost as Seokjin thought.
“This is why you didn’t kiss me? You thought I was cheating on Taehyung?” Yoongi asks, tilting his head to the side, as Seokjin leaves small kisses down the curve of his neck.
Seokjin is a little embarrassed to nod. Now that Yoongi says it out loud, it sounds ridiculous to imagine that Yoongi, this sweet Yoongi, would cheat on someone he loves.
“I would never do that,” Yoongi whispers, and Seokjin looks up at him, nodding.
“I know.”
“I didn’t kiss Taehyung,” Yoongi murmurs, shifting their positions again, now hovering over Seokjin. “He called me over and kissed me, and I was surprised too. I’ve never liked to be the center of attention, so believe me, I was not enjoying it as much as you think.”
Seokjin cups his cheeks, “You don’t know how relieved I am to hear that.”
“Are you?”
Seokjin nods. This is it. He is ready to dive in again, he is ready to risk his heart again.
What if Yoongi breaks it later? It’s okay. At least he has him now, and he will always remember this moment, the moment his mouth opens and whispers a small “I like you, Kitten.” just to receive a smile he has never seen before, a smile that feels it’s made for Seokjin’s eyes only.
He will never forget Yoongi nodding, whispering “I like you too,” with his shy eyes closing, resting their foreheads together.
He will never forget how full his chest feels when Yoongi touches his lips; when Yoongi licks inside his mouth; when Yoongi’s tongue tangles with his.
He will never forget the way Yoongi becomes small in his arms, he will never forget how soft his skin feels under his tongue. He will never forget the tastes of each one of his curves.
He will never forget his cries when Seokjin makes love to him.
He will never forget how his beautiful back arches, and his mouth gasps for air as if he had never breathed before.
What if Yoongi ever breaks his heart? It wouldn’t matter, Seokjin would let him take it, steal it, and keep it, and maybe one day, he would bring it back, because, in his arms, Yoongi feels like a forever, and their bodies will always be drawn to each other the way they are now.