Growing Pains

by OceanLace

Summary:

Crowley is once again without a Nanny for his twin terrors and is at his wit's end. His so called friend Tracey seems to have a solution for him, but is she hoping that this new Nanny will become more? Of course she is! And it's a Good Omens fan fic so love will abound!

Notes:

Hello everyone, it's me again! Am I starting another fic without finishing my last one? I sure am. I couldn't get this idea out of my head but it will probably be pretty slow updating, I'm still writing it as we speak.

Chapter 1

“You know I love the boys, I really, really do, but I’m not getting any younger Duck, I can’t keep up with them like I used to be able to. My knees aren’t what they used to be.” Tracey smoothed down her orange wig before sipping her tea.

“I know Trace, but they don’t like anyone else. They’ve chased off every other person I’ve ever hired to take care of them. They like you, and pretty much only you. They tolerate me at best.”

Tracey clucked her tongue. “Those boys love you Duck, but you have to have a firmer hand with them. Now, I know I have more experience in dealing out punishments then you do –“

“Ugh, no, nope, not going there, thanks.” Crowley threw himself back in his chair. At 35 he still looked boyish especially when he smiled with his hair flopped on his forehead but today he was scowling, his hair pushed back and messy. His boys (biologically his nephews but Harry had all but dumped them on him as soon as they had been born, signed the papers and everything. Fucked off to America to start a new life as if she had never been knocked up in the first place. They were his now and he loved them fiercely even if they drove him mad) had chased off the latest Nanny that he had hired to help take care of them. Crowley had lost count of how many there had been over the years. It was mid-summer, Crowley was horribly busy with his plant nursery and landscaping business and he didn’t have time for any of this. Tracey had been taking care of the boys as much as she could, but she was pushing 60 and was still doing her other “job” semi regularly. Chasing two almost five-year old’s was no easy task.

“When’s the last time you’ve gone anywhere like that hun?”

“Christ Tracey, can we not right now?”

“Oh fine you prude. Listen, I know how hard it is for you to go through the process of finding someone new when you know that they aren’t going to last so you needn’t worry, I’ve got someone lined up! You just need to meet them and give them the ok.”

“I can’t even begin to think about hiring someone new right now, someone new in my house, with my kids, everything is so hectic this time of year.”

Tracey turned her head, “Aziraphale! Yooo hooo! You can come in now love!”

“Oh you’ve got to be kidding me, right now?” Crowley growled. He looked towards the door as this Aziraphale walked into his office, extending his hand.

“Hello,” he said in a bright voice. “My name is Aziraphale. It’s a bit of a tough one so you can call me Az if you prefer.”

Crowley stared at the man for a few seconds too long. He was young, extremely young by the looks of it. He had blond curly hair, so light it was nearly white. His eyes were a bright blue that seemed to be sparkling, or was that the touch of gold eyeliner he was wearing? Crowley let his eyes travel down. He was wearing a tight white t shirt (that was doing things to Crowley) and tight blue shorts. He had flip flops on his feet and his toenails were painted a bright pink. Crowley was going to die right here and now, he was certain of it.

“You’re meant to shake his hand Duck.” Tracey stage whispered, a smile on her face.

“Shit, sorry!” Crowley shook his hand and motioned to an empty chair. “Sorry. Crowley. Is my name.” He cleared his throat.

“Nice to meet you Mr. Crowley.”

“Crowley is just fine.”

“Alright then.” Aziraphale folded his hands in his lap and continued to smile.

“I’m sorry, how old are you? You seem young. Really young.”

“Oh, thank you! I’m 22.”

“Ok, young.”

“How old are you?”

Crowley blinked at him, glad to be wearing his sunglasses. “Excuse me?”

“Well, I don’t see how my age is all that relevant but I told you, so now I’d like to know how old you are.”

“I’m 35.”

“Hmmm, would have pegged you as younger. Nice! You have two four-year old’s I’m told?”

“Uh, yes. Twin demons.” Crowley shifted in his chair, this surprise interview was quickly going off the rails. “Do you have a CV or something I can look at?”

Aziraphale laughed lightly. “Oh no, not at all. I suppose I could write one up for you but it would be very limited. I graduated this spring and haven’t really done much work, other than part time at the University library while I was going to school.”

“Alright….and you’re applying for this childcare job because…?”

“Madam Tracey told me that you would hire me.”

“Did she now,” Crowley clenched his teeth and glared at the smiling woman. “How do you two know each other?”

“Oh, Aziraphale just moved here with his friend Mr. Pulsifer, the new teacher? I met him at Ana’s art class.”

“I see.”

“He was the nude model.”

Crowley choked on nothing while Tracey smiled serenely.

“Are you quite alright?” Aziraphale asked concerned.

“Yup, fine,” Crowley croaked, not fine in the least. He pushed the images that were trying to bubble to the surface as far down as he could. Inappropriate. “Not sure nude modeling will be required for this position.”

“Pity, he’s proper fit.” Tracey said happily, grinning from ear to ear.

“Oh you,” Aziraphale blushed happily. “I have a criminal check done. I’m drug free, don’t do much drinking except a bit socially here and there. I don’t smoke. I’ll be happy with just about any pay that you’re willing to give, I’m quite desperate to pay my own way, poor Newton has been looking after me for a long time I’m afraid.”

Crowley felt a stab of disappointment in his chest to hear that Aziraphale was taken, then internally shook himself, this was a job interview, not a date. “How long have you two been together?”

Aziraphale made a horrified sound. “Together? Newton and I? Disgusting! We’re basically brothers! We were brought up in care together.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Crowley floundered.

“Oh, no need. People get quite squidgy when they hear the mentioning of care or counsel flats, don’t they? It’s silly honestly. Lots of us out there. It was fine once we both got placed with Mary, that’s where we met. I was 8 and he was 12 and we just stuck together like glue. Stayed there until we aged out, which was lovely honestly. Mary’s a gem.” He smiled his pretty smile again.

“Look, I don’t know if this is such a good job, Adam and Lock are terrors, actual bloody terrors, and if you don’t have the experience looking after them…I could find a job for you here, at the shop or in the field if you’d like?”

Aziraphale scrunched up his button nose and held up his perfectly manicured soft hands. “Do I look like the type of person to dig in a garden?”

“No, but you don’t look like the type to finger paint either.”

A sudden loud crash made them all jump.

“Oi, come back here you monsters!” A gruff voice yelled.

“Oh Satan, here we go.” Crowley sighed.

Two little boys came running into the office, hand in hand with a tiny dark-haired person trailing behind them.

“What did they break this time Bea?” Crowley sighed, dreading the answer.

“Knocked over that big rubber tree plant you’ve been trying to shift for ages.”

Crowley rubbed his temples.

“Who are you?” Adam demanded looking at Aziraphale.

“Manners Duck,” Tracey clucked.

“Who are you please?”

Aziraphale beamed at him and offered a hand to first Adam, then Lock. “Hello, my name is Aziraphale, it’s ever so lovely to meet you both.”

Adam looked at him with intense focus. “You’ve got your toenails painted pink.”

“Yes, I do, thank you for noticing. Do you like them?”

“Boys don’t usually have their toenails painted.” Adam said, crossing his arms.

“Adam,” Crowley warned.

“Why do you think that is?” Aziraphale asked calmy.

“Cause it’s something girls usually do?” Adam sounded unsure.

“That’s probably true in most cases. I, myself, don’t care much for what boys and girls usually do. I do the things that I like to do. I like to sometimes paint my nails or wear makeup. I’ve been known to wear a dress on occasion. I certainly have the legs for it! I like to do things that make me happy, I don’t much care for what is ‘usually’ done.”

The boys looked at him intensely, their little noses scrunched up for a few seconds before Adam spoke again. “Are you our new Nanny?” He demanded.

“That depends on your father I suppose. Do you want me to be your new Nanny?”

Adam and Lock turned to one another and seemed to have a silent conversation in the way that only twins can. They turned back to the adults after a few seconds. “We’ll give it a go.” Adam confirmed.

“Hey now, I make the decisions here.” Crowley argued.

“Do you now? News to us.” Tracey said, standing. “Come on now my duckies, let’s clean up the mess you’ve made then we’ll go get some ice cream yeah? Let your Da and Nanny work out things.”

“Ice cream!” Adam yelled, dragging Lock behind him out of the room. Bea jumped out of the way before they were bowled over.

“Not too late to run Blondie.” Bea warned before following after the kids.

“Oh, I like a bit of a challenge.” Aziraphale smiled and waved to Tracey as she left the office as well.

Crowley shook his head. “I’m not even sure what’s happened but apparently you’re hired. Give me your number and I’ll text you the address to the house and we’ll figure out everything else. Can you be there at 7? Hours in the summer will be a bit longer than they would be any other time of the year, and once the brats start school in the fall you’ll have a bit of a split day, if you last that long.”

“Oh, I’m taking this as a personal challenge now,” Aziraphale dug his phone out of his pocket, unlocked the screen and handed it to Crowley. “Put your number in there. I will be at your place bright and early tomorrow morning. Text me any instructions you want, allergies, hard rules and the rest I’m sure Adam will tell me all about. Going to rule the world one day, that one, I can tell.” He snatched his phone back from Crowley and smiled brightly at him again. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He bounced out of the office leaving a bewildered Crowley alone.

“Well that was a thing.”

 

“So it went well then?”

“Ugh, Newton, you’re not listening to me! He’s unreasonably attractive! I’m supposed to see him every day and take care of his kids and not drape myself all over him? Impossible.” Aziraphale huffed as he poked at a cardboard box with his big toe.

“You’re supposed to unpack the box Az, not kick it.”

“I’m going through a crisis here and you expect me to do manual labor?”

Newton laughed and fixed his glasses. “You didn’t have to say yes to the job, you could have just asked him out instead.”

Aziraphale gasped. “That would have gone horribly. He’s older. He’d say no.”

“How much older?”

“A few years.”

“How few are we talking?”

“He’s 35, alright?”

Newton whistled before picking up another box and setting it on the kitchen counter. “Yeah, that’s a few. But how hot are we talking?”

Aziraphale blushed and passed his phone over. He had found the nursey’s Instagram page as soon as he had left and, in turn, found Crowley’s personal page.

“Oh shit. Ok, I see your problem now.” He scrolled through the pictures on display and whistled at what was clearly a thirst trap picture posted a few years ago. Crowley was shirtless, his hair long. He had dirt smudged on his bare chest and cheeks, artfully. He was leaning on a shovel, an unplanted rose bush at his feet. "He's got tattoos." Newt mused. "A rather lot of them."

“Exactly! I’m such a disaster. Look at him! Are you looking at the shirtless one? You are aren't you? I could only see the tattoo on his face today, but I'd like to see the others." He threw his arms up. "What am I going to do?"

“I’ve never really seen you act like this before, it’s kind of great.” Newton passed his phone back and opened the box, digging through it. “Wondered if you were ever going to be interested in anyone. Not that you need to be interested in anyone, if you weren’t that would have been fine too.”

“Yes, yes Newton, you’re very woke and with it and love all the colours of the rainbow. Not the point.”

“What is the point exactly?”

“The point is that his afternoon I found out that I apparently have daddy issues and I want my new boss to destroy me!”

“Oh my god Az, no, stop. Never, ever say those things around me again. Or anyone for that matter.” Newton made a horrified face.

“Did you or did you not ask me what my point was?” Aziraphale threw his arms up, exasperated.

Newton took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes. “I’m going to be teaching his kids in the Fall Az, I don’t need to think about him in the context. Or you for that matter!”

“One look at him would have you thinking those thoughts too my bisexual brother.” Aziraphale bit his lip. “He was behind his desk the whole time, but he looks tall in his pictures. Do you think he’ll be tall?”

“I’m not engaging in this conversation anymore. Grab a box and unpack something.”

“I’m trying to unpack the sexual awakening that I’ve just had!”

“Something tangible please!”

“You’re no help at all.”

“If you keep this up I won’t give you a ride tomorrow.”

Aziraphale opened a box and frowned at the contents. “You can’t give me a ride every day, I’ll have to get my own car.”

“You don’t even have a license.” Newton pointed out, staring at the contents of his own open box.

“Bike then?”

“Have you ever ridden a bike?”

“Newton, of course I have!”

“When? Not since I’ve known you, and you were eight when we met.”

“Regardless, I have ridden a bike. I can’t be that hard to do it again.”

“Yeah, I hear it’s just like riding a bike.” Newton snorted.

“I hate you.”

“Yeah, hate you too. Wanna go explore the village some more? I can’t face another box today.”

“We’re never going to be unpacked at this rate but yes, absolutely.”

Chapter 2

Summary:

Aziraphale survives his first day taking care of the twins and we're introduced to another character

Notes:

A little update of Aziraphale's first day on the new job.
Don't worry, there will be a bit of spice in the next chapter but I'm going to try to keep this as a slow burn. I do love it when the idiots pine.

At six forty-five the next morning the pair sat in Newton’s idling car outside of a huge home on the seashore.

“Are we sure this is it?” Newton asked for the second time.

“It’s the address he gave me.” Aziraphale hugged his backpack closer to him. “He’s a business owner, and he can afford a Nanny, it was a good bet that he’s got money.”

“I can’t help but notice that you haven’t gotten out of the car yet. Do you need me to come with you to the door?” Newton smiled sweetly.

“What? No! Of course I don’t, I’m not a child!” Aziraphale pouted.

“No, obviously not. Seriously though, get out.” Newton made a shooing motion. “You don’t want to be late for your first day.”

“Alright, I’m going.” Aziraphale carefully stepped out of the car and put his backpack on.

“Have a good day! Call me if you need anything!” Newton called out the open door, sounding like a proud parent on the first day of school.

“Ugh, Newt! Go home!” Aziraphale carefully closed the door (he was afraid if he slammed it like he wanted to the whole thing might just come off in his hand) and waved his brother off. After a moment of some deep calming breaths he made his way up the lane, admiring all of the flowers and shrubs that lined the path to the house. He saw a gleaming black car in front of the closed garage and admired it for a moment before finally knocking on the door.

The door was swung open almost immediately by Crowley and Aziraphale openly gaped at him before he managed to close his mouth. Crowley was standing in the open doorway (very tall!) a twin hanging onto each leg, the shirt he must be intending to wear dangling from his free hand.

“Oh thank Satan you’re here,” Crowley breathed, shuffling backwards awkwardly and motioning for Aziraphale to come in.

Aziraphale somehow managed not to drool all over the poor harried father and schooled his face. “Of course I’m here. Good morning Crowley, good morning Lock and Adam. How are you doing this morning?”

“Lock doesn’t want Dad to go to work so we’re gonna keep him here.” Adam said, tightening his grip.

“Oh dear. Does that mean I should just go home then? You don’t need me around if you have your Dad I’m sure.” Aziraphale smiled brightly.

“Wot?” Crowley asked while he tried to shake Adam off one of his long legs.

“I was hoping to walk down to the beach today, maybe have a picnic and a little paddle about, it’s supposed to be very warm today. Maybe hunt for some sea glass, or shells. Oh, I do love a bit of sea glass!” Aziraphale said, sounding wistful. “And this is such a lovely house, I was hoping that someone could show me around, and maybe the garden as well, I’ll bet there are all sorts of fun little nooks and crannies that your father doesn’t even know about and would be so fun to explore! But really, if there’s no need for me then I’ll just hop on out of here and get out of your way.” He slowly turned back towards the door.

“Wait!” Adam cried, loosening his grip a bit and leaning towards Lock. “I want to go the beach.”

Lock nodded. “Me too,” he whispered. Slowly he let go of his father’s leg and stepped back.

Crowley scooped up the quiet boy and hugged him tight. “You’ll be fine kid, you’ll have fun. I know it’s a bit scary, someone new again, but I have a good feeling about this one.”

Aziraphale felt his cheeks warm up as he tried not to listen too closely to their conversations.

Crowley set Lock down then scooped Adam up, who squealed and laughed as Crowley tickled him. “And you, my little monster, try not to be such a terror alright? I don’t want you chasing another one off!”

“I’ll try!” Adam laughed before being set down beside his brother.

“Alright, run on to the kitchen and finish up your breakfast while I have a talk with Az, alright?” Crowley saw the worried look in Lock’s eyes. “I won’t leave without saying see ya later first alright? Promise. We’re right behind you.”

Adam whispered in Lock’s ear which made the boy smile before they turned and scurried off down the hallway.

“Well, that was a great way to start your first day, huh?”

“My dear, you’re not out the door yet, things could very well still go downhill. I’ll manage though.”

“You sure?”

“Reasonably.”

Crowley threw his head back and laughed loudly.

Aziraphale gulped as he watched the long lines of Crowley’s throat bob with each chuckle. He shook his head and cleared his throat. “Ahem. I got your messages last night, no allergies, emergency numbers and everything else, thank you. I’m just going to attempt to keep them somewhat entertained today until I get a better idea how what I can do with them.”

“If you can keep them from destroying the house and making you want to quit today then I’ll be beyond happy.” Crowley pulled on his t-shirt, careful not to knock his sunglasses off in the process. He guided Aziraphale on a quick tour of the first floor before ending up in the kitchen where the boys were perched on impossibly high stools eating bowls of sugary cereal happily.

Crowley scratched the back of his neck. “Yeah, I usually feed ‘em better than this, but the spring and summertime are crazy for me.”

“Oh, my favorite,” Aziraphale pointed at the box. “I’ll try to get a piece of fruit into their tummies today. Maybe even a veg!”

“Whoa, don’t go crazy there.”

“Have to impress on my first day.”

“Seem impressive already.” Crowley big his tongue. Fuck. What was wrong with him? He has a pretty young thing in front of him and suddenly he turns into a creep? Maybe Tracey was right, it had just been too long since he had fooled around in any way and was more pent up then he had realized.

Aziraphale’s face warmed as he looked away quickly then backup at up Crowley through his lashes. Oh, it would be so easy to flirt if there weren’t two four year olds a few inches away. “Right, well, I think we’ll manage, don’t you two think? You’ll keep me in line.”

“Yup,” Adam nodded, his mouth full of cereal. Warlock offered a small milky smile.

“Wonderful. Perhaps your father could scurry off now to work? I’m sure he has a long day ahead of him.”

“So do you, trust me,” Crowley mumbled. “Alright Monsters, listen up. Today is Az’s first day so make it a good one ok? Don’t be so awful that you scare him off, got it? Be as good as you can be, don’t run off or anything. If you to go the sea shore wear your floaties, remember where the sunscreen is? You’ll need to put that on, there’s lots of food in the fridge and cupboards of course, you can help yourself to any of it, and call me! Call me anytime, I’ll pick up, and –“

Aziraphale held up a hand. “Alrighty, off you go then!” He looked at the boys “Say bye to your father!”

Adam waved his spoon, spraying milk all over half the kitchen. “Bye Dad! Have a good day!”

“Bye Papa,” Warlock said, looking a little more sure of the situation then he had been a few minutes before.

“Alright, I can take a hint, bye. Love you both, see you as soon as I can get home alright?”

“Go on, shoo,” Aziraphale motioned him out of the room.

 

“Why are you smiling like an idiot?”

Startled, Crowley looked up to see Anathema had come into his office, her arms full of papers, without him hearing her. “Was I smiling? Sorry, I’ll knock that off right now.” He put his phone face down on his desk.

Anathema dumped her armload on Crowley’s pristine desk and stuck her tongue out at him. “It’s just so rare, it’s off-putting. Seriously, what’s got you all happy?” She started to organize the mess in front of her.

“Nothing, just the new Nanny’s been sending pictures of the boys and looks like they’re having a good day is all. It’s nice for a change.”

Anathema made a ‘give me’ motion and Crowley sighed, handing his phone over. She scrolled through the messages and pictures that had been sent so far today. There was one of the boys splashing in the gentle waves on the beach near the big house, their backs to the camera. There was another taken by the Nanny, the tips of pink painted toenails sticking out of the mound of sand the boys were busily piling on top of them. The most recent picture was of a truly spectacular blanket fort covering a good portion of the living room. She handed the phone back. “Wow, looks like she has it under control then.”

“Not she, he Ana.” Crowley slid his phone back into his pocket and started to leaf through the designs for the latest project they were going to be working on.

“Oh? That’s new. You’ve only hired women before.”

“Yeah, well, Tracey practically threw him at me yesterday. Hope it works out though, he seems nice.”

Anathema stared hard at Crowley. “Nice? Nice? You HATE that word. Who is this ‘nice man’ anyway? Do I know him? I must, I know everyone around here.”

“Oh, you know him. Know him well I heard.” Crowley waggled his eyebrows.

Anathema flushed. “What on earth are you talking about? You know I haven’t…with anyone here in town. It’s too complicated.”

“He’s one of your models apparently. Aziraphale Fell.”

“Oh! Oh, he’s sooooo nice, and super hot too, objectively speaking. I mean, not really my type but I can appreciate him. Do you want to see the pics I have? Better then pink toes, let me tell you!”

Crowley sputtered. “You took naked pictures of him?”

“No, dummy. Well, not fully naked. His bits and bobs were covered. For the most part. I always take pictures of the class while they’re working.” She started scrolling through her phone.

“No Ana, please, I beg you, do not send me semi nude pics of my kid’s Nanny please.”

Ana looked up and smiled slowly. “Oh, I see.”

“What, what do you see you witch?” Crowley busied himself with the papers again. He held one up. “We are not putting in a fucking koi pond at this place. Those idiots wouldn’t know how to take care of them.”

“They’re rich, they’ll hire someone to do it,” Anathema dismissed him. “What I see, good try changing the subject by the way, is that you’d really, really like to see the pics I have. You think he’s hot.”

“Anathema Device. I am his employer. He is taking care of my children. I also have two eyes and of course I can see that he is adorable. I also know that he’s 22 god damn years old, and, again, he works for me. Off limits. Hard pass.”

“Boo!”

“Can we get back to picking a design for these twats please?”

“Fine. I’ll send you those pictures though. When you least expect it, bam! Cute butt!”

“Great.”

 

Crowley unlocked the door and kicked his boots off. He was tired and hungry and wanted to sleep for about six years. He had worked later then he had meant to, it wasn’t fair on Aziraphale on his first day, and not fair for the boys. He tried to press down the guilt of not being able to be with them more. He trudged through the house, listening for the sounds of the boys.

“Now of course if you are full you do not need to finish everything on your plate, but if you have room for a big dessert then I don’t think that your tummy has enough of your dinner in it, do you?” Aziraphale reasoned with Adam.

“If I finish my carrots can I have a medium amount of dessert?” Adam asked, stabbing a piece of carrot with his fork.

“Hmmm…Yes, I think that’s a good compromise, I would agree to that. Now, Lock, you’ve done so well! Your carrots are all gone! Lovely!”

“Smells good, any left for me?”

“Dad!”

“Papa!”

Crowley leaned over each boy and gave them a squeeze and a kiss on their wind tossed hair.

“Welcome home! Of course I saved some for you. Not much of a meal I’m afraid, some dino nuggets, carrots and some orange slices.” Aziraphale blushed, busying himself with clearing his plate and getting Crowley’s out of the oven where he had been keeping it warm.

“Sounds fantastic right about now.” He sat down heavily in the dining room chair as the plate was set down beside him. He poured himself a glass of water and started munching.

“Dad, we went to the beach today! Az made us pick up any trash we found and he let us bury him in the sand!”

“We found shells, they’re in the back garden.” Lock said excitedly.

“And we built a fort out of ALL the blankets in the house! It’s still up!”

“Ah, yes. My apologies. They wanted to show you.” Aziraphale smiled as he put a small dish of chocolate ice cream in front of each boy.

“I can’t wait to see it, do you think I’ll fit?”

“Yeah!” Adam bounced in his seat. “I bet we all can, it’s giant Dad! Maybe we can sleep in there tonight!”

“Well there are certainly enough pillows and blankets to make it nice and cozy.” Aziraphale smiled as he cleared their plates and puttered around in the kitchen, cleaning while Crowley and his sons ate and talked about plans for the night that seemed to include Disney movies and the fort.

Crowley pushed his empty plate away. “You guys go wash that chocolate off your faces alright? I gotta kick Az out of here.”

“Ah, no,” Lock pouted.

Crowley looked at him in surprise. That was a new thing, Lock didn’t tend to get attached to many people.

Aziraphale dried his hands. “I’ll be back, bright and early tomorrow morning. Now, off you pop, do as your father asked. You have a wonderful night.”

“Bye Az!” Adam called as he ran out of the room, Lock in tow.

“So,” Crowley stretched and Aziraphale tracked the way his t-shirt rode up his flat stomach just a bit. “You survived the day then?”

Aziraphale looked away and busied his hands. “Yes, it was rather lovely. They showed me the house and the gardens. All of it lovely by the way, though the house is a bit…modern, isn’t it?”

Crowley chuckled. “You can say cold. A lot of grey and stone huh? When I built it, I didn’t have kids in mind, that’s for sure.”

“Well, it’s lovely. As are the gardens, so pretty, but that makes sense, I suppose. We had a lovely time on the beach, we had our lunch there as well, then came back and got cleaned up and we built the fort and played some games and before you knew it, it was time for dinner. They were wonderful, honestly. No blowups, no tears. Couldn’t have asked for a better day.”

“I’m glad to hear it, I was…concerned. The kids are good at running people off. It’s kind of impressive actually.”

“Well, they are both extremely intelligent, that’s for certain. Well, we never did talk about it, did you want me to stay through to bedtime, or-“

“Oh god no, I’m not one of those Dad’s, I can put my kids to bed. Go on, get out of here. I’ll see you in the morning?”

“Yes, of course. I’ll see you in the morning. Good night Crowley.”

“Good night Aziraphale.”

Chapter 3

Summary:

Aziraphale ends his night off at an art class and gets to know more of the community.

Notes:

short update tonight. I'm not sure when I will be able to update again, I don't have much more written after this but it's coming to me.
CW there's a small section of smut that's easily avoided if that's not your thing

Aziraphale unlocked the door to the flat and dropped his backpack on the floor. He was hot and sticky from the walk back into town from Crowley’s home on the outskirts.

“Oh, you’re home,” Newt came around the corner, surprised to see Aziraphale there. “Why didn’t you call? I would have come and gotten you.”

“It’s fine. I didn’t need you to come and get me, I walked, it was lovely.”

Newt screwed up his nose. “Was it? You’re all dusty and sweaty.”

“Sorry to upset your delicate sensibilities.” Aziraphale mumbled as he made his way to the fridge and poured himself some water, chugging it down.

“Do you want to do something tonight to celebrate your first day? It’s still early. Maybe we can go to the pub? It looks like a decent enough place.”

“I would love to but I got a text from Anathema Device, the art lady? She wanted me to sit for her class again so I have to shower and get going.”

“Aw, too bad. I wanted to hear all about Hot Dad and his kids tonight,” Newton joked.

“Ha ha,” Aziraphale plugged his phone in to charge on the counter and headed towards the bathroom. “The kids were good, great even. Really well behaved, don’t know why their father told me they were monsters.”

“And how was Daddy?”

“Newt don’t start!” Aziraphale slammed the bathroom door but could still hear Newton laughing behind it. He pouted while he stripped out of his clothes and climbed into the lukewarm spray. It had been a good day, really. It took a little while to get Lock to warm up to him enough to not be glued to Adam’s side, but eventually he had seemed more sure. Searching for seashells had helped (he discovered that both he and Lock seemed to have a love for finding shiny pretty things). The fort had been Adam’s idea, naturally. They had been soldiers, wizards and then knights during the building process. He had laughed a lot and enjoyed himself but he was tired now. He had been looking forward to laying on one end of the couch and watching mindless TV with Newton but the cash from the live drawing classes was a big draw. It also allowed him to meet people in the village and he honestly didn’t mind stripping down. Maybe he could give someone a thrill!

He shampooed his hair quickly and rinsed before starting to scrub his body. As he scrubbed his stomach he began to think of Crowley’s bare torso and the quick glimpse he had seen of Crowley’s own tight stomach at the dinner table. He remembered the dusting of auburn hair, the hint of ribs… and he felt a jolt go through his body, his cock starting to stiffen. “Seriously?” he muttered incredulously. He reached down and stroked himself to full hardness and leaned his forehead against the cool tile. While never actually having had any type of sex, Aziraphale was lucky to be blessed with a very vivid imagination. It wasn’t that he didn’t like the idea of sex, or kissing or things like that, but he just never felt the desire strong enough to act on, at least with another person. He didn’t find it easy to get close to people. He could put on a good act, of course, be friendly and flirty and the life of the party when he needed to but it was hard to let people actually know him. A counselor he had seen while attending university had told him that he had abandonment issues, from his time in care (big shock there, luckily the sessions had been free) and it was easier not to let someone get close to him and that way they could never leave him. As a result he hadn’t had a boyfriend or partner of any kind ever, and the thought of having sex with a stranger was so unpleasant…so no sex for him. That didn’t mean he didn’t have urges. Last night he had cried into the pillow as he opened himself up on his fingers and stroked himself roughly with his free hand, imagining it was Crowley behind him.

He was thinking of him again now, in the shower with him. He was so tall and lean; he had towered over Aziraphale this morning when he had thrown the door open. Aziraphale imagined how he would crowd him up against the shower wall, his large hand covering him as he jerked him painfully slow, thumb sweeping over the leaking head. “Oh god,” he moaned into the wall, biting the inside of his cheeks to try to keep quiet. He came quickly and hard, his knees trembling. “Oh fuck,” he was gasping. Maybe he just needed to get this out of his system? A few fantasies wouldn’t hurt and maybe it would keep him from flirting or thinking improper thoughts every time he saw his new boss. He should invest in good lube. Maybe a toy? He had never considered such a thing before but he thought of it now, how it would feel…his spent cock gave a twitch of interest and he shook his head, enough of that for now, he had to get going.

 

An hour later he was being arranged by a smiling Anathema in front of the small group of students. He was standing today, naked, in a pose that reminded him of an Ancient Greek soldier.

“Comfortable?” She asked, moving his arm slightly.

“Yes, all good.”

“is it warm enough in here?”

“Yes, it’s perfect.”

“Wonderful!” She turned towards the class. “Now Aziraphale has very generously agreed to pose completely nude for us today, so this is a real treat. We don’t get many nude models here in Tadfield. Please take advantage of this everyone and let the creativity flow.” She slowly walked around the room, looking at each member’s sketches as they worked. She would stop to speak to each student, discuss their sketch and offer advice or praise. It was a small class so she was able to take her time with each person.

“Hello Tracey, how are you doing tonight?”

“Hello Duck, I’m lovely, especially now. This is really helping to get the creative juices flowing,” she motioned to Aziraphale in the middle of the room, bracelets jingling on her wrist.

“Yes, I see you’ve chosen to concentrate on one particular anatomy tonight.”

“Not often you get to see one of those here in Live Drawing, it’s an exciting night! And to have one that’s so lovely too, just a treat.”

Some of the other students snorted and Aziraphale’s cheeks darkened a bit but he didn’t move.

“Honestly woman, calm yourself.” The man sitting next to Tracey muttered gruffly.

“Oh Mr. S, it’s only a bit of fun! You know I only have eyes for you!”

The man’s cheeks brightened and he looked away, back at his canvas.

Anathema moved over to look at what he was choosing to focus on. “Wow Mr. Shadwell, you are getting so much better at your details, those toenails are amazing.” Mr. Shadwell made a grumbling sound that somehow managed to sound a bit pleased but kept his head on his canvas.

The minutes ticked by and before Aziraphale realized it, thirty minutes had passed and Anathema was placing a robe around his shoulders. “Alright, stretch it out and have a drink. Do you need anything? Are you alright to do another pose after a break?”

“Yes, perfectly fine, I didn’t even realize it had already been thirty minutes.” Aziraphale tied the robe loosely and walked to the back of the room where he had left his bag, taking out his water bottle and taking a small drink.

Tracey tracked his movements. “You sure you don’t want to put your feet up love? You must be exhausted after watching those little terrors all day. I know I’m worn right out when I have them.”

“Oh, I am a bit tired but feel fine. And the boys were lovely, honestly.”

Everyone in the room seemed to share the same look of mild disbelief. “Really, I promise! We had a really nice day together.” Aziraphale put his water bottle back into his bag and stretched his back.

“That’s really good to hear. Crowley has had a terrible time trying to get care for those boys. Adam can break anyone I think, and Lock won’t warm up to anyone really. I don’t know what it’s going to be like when they go to school.” Tracey sighed.

“With my brother Newton as their teacher I’m sure they will be fine, they will be in good hands. Newton is honestly the kindest person I’ve ever met. I know they will love him.”

“How are you finding Crowley?” One of the other students spoke up, she was dark skinned with beautiful natural hair fanned around her head.

“He’s been nothing but kind, but I’ve only known him for a couple of days, um?”

“Oh, Rose. I’m Pepper’s Mom, well one of them anyway. You’ll meet Pepper soon enough, she’ll be starting school with Crowley’s twins in the Fall. They went to nursery together on the days when he could get the boys there.”

“Nice to meet you Rose, I’m sure we will get to each other quite well If the boy sand Pepper are in the same class together.” Aziraphale gave her a warm smile.

“Alright, let’s get back at it,” Anathema came to collect Aziraphale again, taking his robe from him and posing him so his back was to the class.

“Boo!” Tracey yelled causing everyone else to laugh.

Aziraphale giggled and looked back, winking at Tracey, before facing away again, letting Anathema pose him exactly how she wanted.

“I’m so sorry Aziraphale, apparently you’re causing the crowd to get extra rowdy tonight.”

“I’m sure Tracey doesn’t need my help to get rowdy.”

Tracey barked out a laugh. “Oh, I like you.”

By the time the class was over, Aziraphale was near dead on his feet, crisp notes shoved into his pockets. He internally groaned as he readied himself for the walk across the village back to his flat. As he left the community center a rusty truck pulled up beside him. “Get in Lad, I’ll take you home. It’s on my way.”

“Oh, Mr. Shadwell you don’t have to do that.”

“Hurry up before I take my offer back.”

Sending him a sunny smile, Aziraphale quickly made his way to the passenger door and climbed in. “Thank you, I really do appreciate it.”

“None of that now,” Shadwell waved a hand as he pulled out onto the quiet street. “Don’t mind, not going out of my way. You really tamed those boys today?”

“Well, I don’t think either could ever be ‘tamed’ and nor would I want to, but we had a lovely day, yes. They were quite well behaved and listened very well to me.”

“Aye, that’s good. Maybe Crowley should have hired a man a long time ago, those boys are used to just him being with them, and you’re a fancy boy and all, like him.”

Aziraphale made a face. “If by ‘fancy boy’ you mean gay, then yes. If you have a problem with that-“

“Don’t get your knickers in a twist Lad, I meant nothing by it. Who am I to judge? I was young once too.”

Aziraphale’s eyes went wide.

“What I’m saying is I’m glad. Glad you’re here, take care of those boys, give Crowley a bit of peace. I’ve known him since he was a little thing himself, always causing mischief, him and his sister. Wasn’t much of a home life there, but look at him now, really made something of himself. Does a lot for the town too you know? Doesn’t want people to know it, but we all do.”

Aziraphale, still flustered, smiled. “Well, that is really good to know. It would seem an awful pity if he wasn’t a good person.”

Shadwell stopped the truck in front of the small building of flats.

“Thank you so much, I really appreciate it.”

Shadwell waved off the thanks. “See ya around Lad.”

“Good night Mr. Shadwell.” He hopped out of the truck and made his way to the door, happy to be home earlier than expected. As he had been getting ready to leave the community center Newton had sent him a picture of the coffee table covered in pizzas and all their favorite snacks and drinks, Netflix waiting on the television. He truly did have the best brother possible.

Chapter 4

Summary:

Aziraphale and Crowley spend a bit of time together.
A new nickname emerges!

The last days of June had melted into the hazy days of July. Crowley’s schedule was still busy, but not nearly as insane as it had been in May and June when the wedding orders of the shop would clash with landscaping and new projects. It had only been a few weeks since he had hired Aziraphale but the boys seemed to be thriving with their new Nanny. Warlock had been trying to copy Aziraphale’s posher accent which was adorable, and Adam hadn’t tried to mutiny ye, which was frankly amazing. There was a growing collection of seashells and sea glass being stored in bowls and vases all over Crowley’s house now. One day he had come home early to find Lock and Aziraphale doing serious trading between themselves, dividing up that days’ finds in the back garden.

“Just like a couple of magpies,” Crowley had joked.

“If I’m a magpie then you’re a crow, in all your tight black clothing and-“Aziraphale had promptly turned bright red and nearly ran back into the house to ‘check on something’. Crowley had watched him go, an amused smile on his face, one eyebrow high up on his forehead.

Today Crowley had left work early and joined Aziraphale and the boys at the beach, both adults leaning back on a blanket under an umbrella while the boys built unrecognizable blobs in the sand close by.

“What did you find today Magpie?” Crowley drawled, glancing over.

Aziraphale’s cheeks grew pinker. “You’re not going to let that go are you?”

“Nope.”

Aziraphale sighed. “You’re worse than the children.”

Crowley grinned sharply. “I’ve heard that before.”

“We didn’t find much today as we’ve picked this particular stretch pretty clean. If we get a bit of rough weather who knows? I’ve been meaning to do a walk some evening further down but well, it slips my mind.”

“Any time you want to drop by, you’re welcome, you know? You could come by on your days off and use the path to the beach, rinse off in the back garden when you’re finished. We wouldn’t mind, you know. The boys miss you when you’re not here.”

“Only the boys?” Aziraphale’s cheeks grew darker.

Oh, it was dangerous. Crowley wanted nothing more than to let him know how much he missed him when he wasn’t around, how he hated the silent phone when there weren’t pictures and messages coming through constantly. “Of course I miss you, I can never make the dino nuggies like you do.”

Aziraphale stuck his tongue out at him and looked back towards the boys. “I’ve been meaning to ask, do you have any plans for the boy’s birthdays? Adam has been mentioning it practically nonstop.”

“August is a long way off Magpie.”

“Crowley, honestly, it’s a month! A month is no time! We need to have a plan! They’re turning five, it’s a huge deal! We need to find a location, we need to decide on food, games, prizes. Presents! Do you have presents for them? And a cake, oh goodness.”

“Don’t panic, it’s fine.”

“How can you be so calm? You know Adam wants a puppy right?”

“He wishes.” Crowley snorted. “Look, I have some gifts, of course, I’m not that bad of a Dad, give me some credit. And I mean, usually it’s just us and Tracey, Ana, Bea –“

“A bunch of 40 + year old’s at a children’s party?”

Crowley sputtered. “Excuse me? I am NOT 40.”

Aziraphale laughed then looked towards the children and tutted. “Adam Crowley,” he called, “do not take another bite of that sand!”

“I didn’t!”

“I just saw you lick your shovel, don’t do it again!”

“Fine!”

“Ugh.” He turned back to Crowley. “What were we talking about?”

“The fact that you think I’m decrepit apparently. Bones turning to dust.”

“What bones? I’ve seen very little evidence that you’ve actually got any.”

“You’re feisty today. I’m loving it.”

“Really. Why don’t you leave it to me, I’ll plan a party, invite some actual children, not adults who act like children. We can do it here, the garden is certainly large enough. Hopefully the weather will hold.”

“Not really your job though is it?”

Aziraphale scrunched up his nose. “I’m pretty sure it is though?”

“Who knows. Whatever you think is best Magpie.”

“I hate you, you know that right?”

Crowley grinned. “Sure you do.”

 

Aziraphale had stayed later that evening, helping Crowley give the boys baths after their supper, then helped with the reading of bedtime stories. Once the boys were reasonably settled (Adam with his scruffy stuffed dog under one arm and Lock with his prized duck) the adults drifted down into the living room.

“I know it’s getting late-“

“Crowley, it’s 7:30, I’d hardly call that late.”

“Well, an old codger like me, getting close to my bedtime and all.” Crowley grinned as Aziraphale huffed and rolled his eyes. “I thought about it and wondered if you wanted to do some party planning? Maybe you’re right, we should make a bit of a thing out of it this year. They’re turning five, starting school soon…growing up too damn fast.”

“Well, as shocking as you thinking is,”

“Hey now!”

“I think that’s a wonderful plan. Can I tell you what I’ve been thinking?”

“I’m sure you will regardless.” Crowley fell back on the couch and sprawled, long legs taking up an impossible amount of space.

Aziraphale cleared his throat and sat primly on the other end. “Well, I thought we could invite the children that Adam and Lock liked to play with from nursery. We’ve met them for play dates in the park a few times since I’ve been taking care of them, and they’re all very sweet. Well, I’m not sure one would call Pepper sweet, tenacious is probably the right word for her. Perhaps she’ll be ruling the world right beside Adam someday.”

“Co-rulers, I like it.”

“Yes, well, there’s Pepper, Jeremy and Brian. They didn’t seem to make up with any of the other children, not in any real way. Their birthday is on a Saturday which is wonderful luck, I can contact the parents and see if they’re free that day. I thought maybe we could rent on of those little bouncy castles for them? Kids love those! We could have candy and cake and pizza and ice cream. Maybe something else for the adults. We can set things up in the back garden and I just know they would be thrilled.”

“Wow, you have been thinking about this, huh?”

“Well, when Adam mentions it about a hundred times a day, it’s hard not to, honestly.”

“Ha! Then he mentions it another fifty times to me before bed.”

“He really wants a dog, you know.”

“Of course I bloody know, it’s all he talks about, that’s the only thing he’s mentioned.”

“You don’t want a dog?”

“Ah, I don’t know Aziraphale. A dog is a big responsibility, and they’re so little. How do you feel about dogs? It would be like another kid you’d be taking care of.”

“I don’t think it would be like another child. I’m fine with dogs. I’ve always wanted a cat, honestly. I’ve never been able to have one though. My last home, she didn’t have any pets, then I was in university housing and now I’m here…things have been busy. Maybe someday.” He looked wistful then shook his head. “As I was saying, it wouldn’t be anymore trouble, I’m sure. I can handle it.”

“I know that you’re capable, I’m not questioning that.” Crowley took his sunglasses off. The room was dim enough that the light didn’t bother him. “Fuck it. You wanna go look at dogs tomorrow? There’s a shelter in the next town over we can go to.”

“Oh, yes! I’d love to!” Aziraphale smiled brightly. “Well, now that is settled, I should get going.”

“I’ll walk you out.”

Aziraphale gathered his things and followed Crowley to the door, exchanging goodbyes. As Aziraphale walked down the lane and into the roadway, Crowley called after him. “Aziraphale, what are you doing?”

Aziraphale stopped and looked at him blankly. “I’m walking home.”

“You’re walking?”

“Yes?”

“Walking all the way into the village?”

“Yes?”

“Since when?”

“What do you mean?”

“Why are you walking into the village?”

“Crowley, what the hell are you on about? I’m going home.”

“By walking?”

Aziraphale threw his arms up in the air. “Yes Crowley, how else am I supposed to get to my flat? By elephant?”

“By driving you idiot.”

“Crowley, I have been coming to your house almost every day for weeks now. When have you ever seen me drive here?”

Crowley left the doorway and tramped down the lane. “You walk here and home ever bloody day? How long does that even take?”

“Well, if it’s raining then Newton insists on driving me, or if it’s very hot in the evenings he’ll come and meet me in the lane somewhere. Sometimes I’ll get a ride here or back with Mr. Shadwell if he’s going my way. He always stops for me. It doesn’t take long, though, half an hour at most.”

“Why don’t you drive here though? At least somedays. Surely your brother doesn’t need that wreck of a car every day.”

“Oh, well, of course Newton would dive me here and back every day if I’d let him, and naturally he’d let me borrow the car, if I asked.”

“And?”

“Well, it’s just that, well…”

“Spit it out Magpie.”

“I can’t drive, alright?”

Crowley laughed.

“Oh, thank you very much.” Aziraphale turned on his heel and started to stomp away, cheeks burning.

“No, wait, I’m sorry,” Crowley reached out and grabbed his arm, pulling him back towards him, pulling Aziraphale off balance, then righting him again.

“Goodness.” Aziraphale breathed. They were close now, much closer than before. Aziraphale had to crane his head up to look him in his honey-colored eyes.

Crowley gazed down at Aziraphale and swallowed thickly. He had a ridiculous urge to tuck one of his curls behind his ears so he let go of his arm and took half a step back. “Take the test Magpie. You’re cleaver, you’ll pass easily enough. When it comes to the driving test, I’ll help. I can teach you to drive, no one better in town to do it.”

“You drive like a demon.”

“You love it, gives you a bit of a thrill. I can teach you how to drive a real car and your brother can teach you how to drive a toy car, and between us we’ll make an expert out of you.”

“I don’t know…”

“Please Aziraphale?”

Aziraphale gulped. The thought of sitting in a car alone with Crowley was a sweet sort of torture. “Alright, I’ll do it. If it will make you happy.”

“It would make me very happy.”

Aziraphale nodded again and then took a step backward. “Alrighty then. I’ll just be heading on home then.”

Crowley smiled again. “See you bright and early tomorrow morning, time to go find Adam a mangy mutt.”

Chapter 5

Summary:

Crowley takes the twins their Nanny to the animal shelter to pick out a dog but things don't go quite as planned.

Warning: short fluffy chapter ahead.

“Are we really getting a puppy Dad?”

“Yes Adam. For the hundredth time, yes.” Crowley’s hands tightened on the steering wheel.

“Mind the speed limit,” Aziraphale murmured. He turned in the passenger seat. “I know that you’re very excited Adam and that’s good, it’s an exciting day! However, you must trust that your father wouldn’t lie to you, especially about something that’s so important. We will be at the shelter in two ticks but you must promise to behave! There will be many animals there and we mustn’t be too loud, they hear so much better than us and we will hurt their little ears.”

“Alright, ok, I promise, I don’t want to hurt the animals. I just want a dog so much!” Adam cried, bouncing in his car seat.

“Yes darling I know. Patience, alright? How about you Lock, are you excited?”

Lock shrugged his shoulders. “Adam wants a puppy, so I want a puppy I guess.”

Crowley quickly turned to Aziraphale and they shared a look.

“It’s a family dog Lock, no matter what Adam thinks. We don’t get a dog unless we all agree on which one, alright?” Crowley glanced in the rear-view mirror to catch Lock’s eye.

“Alright Papa.”

They finally pulled into the shelter parking lot Adam squealed In excitement.

“Fuck me,” Crowley mumbled under his breath. Aziraphale heard and tutted.

“Language.” He turned around again. “None of that in the building Adam, remember what I said please.”

“Alright Azi, I’m sorry.”

“That’s quite alright.”

Seatbelts were unbuckled and doors were opened. Crowley swept Adam up in his arms before he could take off in a run and Aziraphale held Lock’s hand as they all made their way into the grey building where they were welcomed by the staff. There were shown where to look around at the available dogs and left to roam on their own with a promise to check on them shortly. There was a symphony of barking as they made their way into the dog area and Lock pressed himself up against Aziraphale’s leg.

Aziraphale scooped him up and held him tight. “It’s alright my darling, they are just so excited to see us! They all want to have a nice lovely home and are trying to get our attention. ‘Hello!’ they’re shouting, ‘Hello, look at me!’” Lock gave a small smile but made no indication that he wanted to get down from his Nanny’s arms.

Holding his other wiggling twin Crowley watched the interaction and felt a flutter in his chest. It looked so natural, Aziraphale holding Lock and trying to sooth his anxiety. He closed his eyes for a second and then focused on Adam again. “Ok, listen, hey listen Adam. I’m going to put you down and you are going to be calm, do you understand? No fingers in cages ok? We don’t know if any of these dogs like four year old fingers for treats, got it?”

Adam giggled. “I got it, I got it.”

Crowley set Adam on his feet and watched as his son skipped down the hallway, peering into every cage, giving each dog a critical look. Aziraphale and Lock followed behind the pair, occasionally stopping at a calmer pup’s kennel so Lock could have a look. He held tight to Aziraphale’s collar with one hand as he took in everything.

“Here, Dad, Azi, Lock, here, here! Here’s our dog!” Adam was crouched down in front of a kennel near the end of the row, a small black and white terrier mix wagging its tail and jumping up against the kennel door.

“Ah, I see you’ve found Bandit, he’s our newest guest.” A worker met the group. She explained where the dog was found, what condition he had been in, his temperament (good with children and other animals) as well as the fee to adopt him, if they wished to take him home. “What do you think? Would you like to take him into a room and see if you like him?”

“I love him.” Adam declared, solemnly.

“Oh well, perfect then.” She smiled and looked to Crowley.

“Yeah, we’ll try him on for size.”

Bandit was hooked to a leash and he led the way to a small room with dog toys scattered about. “Why don’t you boys sit on the floor and Bandit will do a bit of a sniff around and come over and see you when he’s ready. Remember, don’t grab at him, you’ll frighten him. Hold the back of your hands out for him to get a good sniff.”

Within seconds of being let off his leash Bandit was crawling between either boy, covering them both in slobbery doggy kisses. Adam laughed loudly, delighted. Warlock looked a bit unsure but stroked the dog when it would slow down for a rub.

Crowley had started taking a video and leaned over towards Aziraphale. “What do you think, new member of the family?”

Aziraphale snapped a couple of pictures. “Yes, it seems so.”

“What do you think boys?”

“Please Dad, please, I love him so much.”

“Yes, I know that Adam. What do you think Lock?”

“He’s nice.”

“Oh, what a ringing endorsement.”

“Lock would you like to look at the other animals? The cats or bunnies?” Aziraphale asked.

“Bunnies?” Lock hopped up, eyes wide and excited.

Crowley looked stricken. He pulled Aziraphale aside and bent his head to whisper in his ear. “We’re here for a dog, not a dog AND a bunny Magpie.”

Aziraphale pouted. “That dog will clearly be Adam’s, why can’t Lock just look and see if something catches his eye?”

“Because a blasted rabbit needs a hutch and cage and hay and I don’t know? Carrots?”

“Pellets and lettuce I believe.”

“Aziraphale!” Crowley hissed.

Lock was tugging on Crowley’s shirt. “Papa, can I look at the bunnies? Please?”

Crowley schooled his face. “Of course you can kid. Why don’t you and Azi go look at the bunnies and I’ll stay here with Adam and Bandit.”

“Oh, his name is Dog.” Adam said matter-of-factly.

“Of course it is.” Crowley rolled his eyes behind his sunglasses.

“Papa said we can look at the bunnies!” Lock jumped up and down.

“He did! Let’s go darling.” Aziraphale and Lock both gave Crowley blinding smiles before they left the room.

Ten minutes later while Crowley was filling out the paperwork for Dog, his phone pinged. He opened it to a picture of Lock smiling brightly while holding up a pudgy little bunny with long floppy ears.

 

‘fucks sake’ he typed back. ‘I guess we’re getting a rabbit too’

‘You big softie!’

‘shut it’

 

“Hey, looks like my other son has decided he wants a bunny. Guess I’ll need to fill out paperwork for this guy as well.” Crowley showed the shelter worker the picture on his phone then he shot off a text to Hastur and Ligur asking how long it would take them to bang out a rabbit hutch and dreaded their replies.

“Oh, that’s the orange mini lop that we recently rescued. He will make a lovely pet. Let’s head over that way.”

Adam proudly led Dog on his leash as they walked towards the small animal section of the building. The bunny had been put back in it’s cage but Lock was sitting on the floor in front of it, happily stroking the soft bits of fur that were sticking out. Aziraphale was at the other end of the room speaking to a different worker who was leaning in close while Aziraphale had something cradled in his arms. Crowley left Adam with Lock at the bunny cage and stalked over.

“Oh, Crowley, hello, sorry, I was watching Lock, I promise but I heard this little chap crying and I just had to come and see him and look at him Crowley, he only has one eye!” Aziraphale held out the tiny black kitten, who indeed was missing his left eye.

“Oh, I didn’t realize you were here with…your family?” The man who had been helping Aziraphale looked disappointed and shuffled back.

Crowley’s head snapped towards him. He was a bit older than Aziraphale and had the rugged look of a man who enjoyed tramping about in fields with half a dozen dogs on a rainy Saturday morning. Crowley hated him instantly. “Yup.” Crowley popped the ‘p’ annoyingly. “We’re here looking to add to our happy little family. Who do you have here Magpie?” Crowley leaned towards Aziraphale, invading his space.

Aziraphale, enthralled with the purring black kitten barely noticed anything else around him. “They’ve called him Cy, which is kind of rude if you ask me, it’s not his fault he’s lost an eye, poor little thing. Did you know that black cats statistically don’t get adopted as often as other colored cats? Derick told me, isn’t that awful?”

“Derick told you, did he?” Crowley sneered. “Well lucky for this little furball, he’s coming home with us.”

“Oh Crowley, no, I couldn’t possibly-“

“Don’t you worry your pretty little head about it Magpie.” Crowley turned put a little extra swagger into his steps as he went back to his boys. “We’ll need adoption papers for that little guy too.”

 

Outwardly Crowley was the picture of calm as he drove towards the nearest pet supply store but inwardly he was a bundle of nerves. He had bought his Nanny a kitten. His Nanny? He wasn’t just his Nanny anymore though was he? It felt like he was a part of the family now. The boys both loved him and Crowley…it was best not to think about it honestly. But when he had seen that guy, Derick, leaning into Aziraphale’s personal space, smiling that sleezy smile…He had been so, well, there was no other word for it other than jealous. He had no right to be jealous, no claim over Aziraphale, but Satan help him, he wanted to make that claim.

Aziraphale sat beside him happily cradling his new little black kitten who was purring loudly, staring down at the little fluffy thing with a look of pure wonder and joy. Dog was jumping all over the backseat, occasionally barking excitedly while Adam laughed. Lock was talking nonstop to his bunny who sat on his lap in a small cardboard container with breathing holes large enough that Lock could look through and see Floppy. Crowley wasn’t sure he had ever heard Lock speak so much to someone who wasn’t Adam before today. Ligur had replied to the group chat (predictably enough taking the piss) but said that they could come over the next evening and bang out a nice little rabbit hutch outside.

“I can’t believe you bought me a kitten.” Aziraphale said for the third time since they had gotten into the car.

“What’s one more animal for the zoo? Besides, you were already in love with it, would have broken your heart to walk away without him.”

“Yes, but I could have paid the fee myself.”

“Don’t mention it Magpie, honestly. I know you. You would have talked yourself out of it and then felt bad for weeks thinking about him in his little cage.”

Aziraphale chuckled. “Oh dear, it seems you do know me.”

 

Once at the pet store Crowley loaded the boys and their new pets into one cart that Aziraphale pushed (with the sleeping kitten tucked in his shirt) while they slowly went up and down each aisle, Crowley loading his own cart and having to leave it at the front of the store and started on another. Food and water bowls had to be purchased as well as food, treats and toys. Brushes and nail clippers, collars and harnesses. A cage for Floppy, bedding and litter boxes and actual litter (one litter box for the flat and one for the house, incase Aziraphale wanted to bring his new pet to work with him. Crowley couldn’t believe what a sap he was.).

After a brief argument at the till in which Crowley won the right to pay for everything, they were all in the impossibly packed car and heading back to the village.

“I’ll drop you at your flat, I’m just going to take the rest of the day and get these monsters all settled.”

“Oh, are you certain? There’s so much work to be done, I don’t mind helping. I’m supposed to be working all day after all.”

“Nah, you go home and settle in with your new friend there. Did you text Newton about him yet?”

“Oh, um, no. I suppose I should text him and ask him to meet me downstairs to help bring up all this gear you insisted on buying.”

“Oh man, hope he likes cats.”

Aziraphale snorted. “Newton likes everyone. Well, nearly everyone. He won’t mind.” Aziraphale pushed his face into the sleeping kitten’s fur.

“You’re worse than the kids back there.”

“I’ve wanted a kitten practically my whole life,” his voice was soft, “and now I have one. Isn’t it amazing? Thank you Crowley.”

Crowley felt his cheeks heat up, a warm feeling down in his gut. “Don’t mention it, really. Managed to make all my boys happy today didn’t I?”

Aziraphale’s cheeks pinked. “All your boys? Is that what I am? One of your boys?”

They had pulled up to a stop near Aziraphale’s flat. Crowley turned the car off and half turned in his seat, Aziraphale mirroring him.

“Aziraphale, I –“

“Yes?” Aziraphale whispered.

“Dad! Dog is PEEING on me!”

Both men in the front seat startled. “Fuck!”

“Papa, that’s a bad word!”

“I’ve been peed on!”

“Goodness,” Aziraphale said, opening the door and almost falling out onto the sidewalk. “Let me run up stairs and get a towel, I’ll only be a mo.”

“Fuck,” Crowley cursed again. He had been so close to, close to what exactly? Kissing Aziraphale? Telling him that he had developed feelings for him sometime around the second he first laid eyes on him? How could he have forgotten the boys were in the backseat? A wave of guilt washed over him. The boys and their happiness, that’s what he needed to focus on. He was too old for Aziraphale anyway, he thought grumpily as he hauled a dripping sniffling Adam out of the car. He had to put this stupid crush he had behind him and focus on the boys. He could still have Aziraphale in his life as his boy’s Nanny, and, he hoped as his friend.

Chapter 6

Summary:

Driving lessons and birthday parties in today's chapter with a wee bit of smut thrown in for flavour :)

Crowley’s resolve to put this silly little crush he had lasted about thirty seconds into their first driving lesson. He had pulled up to Aziraphale’s flat the evening of his day off, Tracey staying with the kids. Aziraphale had come bouncing out of the flat and he was wearing glasses. Glasses!

“Glasses.” Crowley said intelligently.

“Hello to you too Crowley. Yes, I’m wearing my glasses today.” Aziraphale adjusted the small golden frames then buckled his seatbelt.

“Since when do you wear glasses?” Crowley pulled out into traffic.

“Um, since always? I usually have my contacts in. I have awful eyesight. You’ve seen me wear these before, surely?”

“Aziraphale, believe me when I tell you, I wouldn’t have forgotten if I had seen you wearing those.”

Aziraphale frowned. “Do they look that bad?”

“The exact opposite of bad Magpie.”

“Oh!” Aziraphale blushed furiously.

That night, when the kids had long since been put to bed, Crowley fisted his aching cock roughly in the shower with soapy hands. He pictured Aziraphale on his knees, pouty lips wrapped tightly around him, making urgent sounds. Crowley thought of pulling out and covering those glasses in his cum, how it would drip down the lenses and onto that beautiful face. He came so hard his knees buckled and he nearly brained himself on the tile wall.

The next driving lesson consisted mostly of making Aziraphale back in and out of parking spaces until he could do it without thinking. This had him putting his arm on the back of the passenger seat as he leaned and looked out the rear window. Each time he did Crowley would smell the citrusy cologne Aziraphale wore and feel the heat radiating from his body. That night he didn’t even make it into the house. He stopped at the end of his driveway just off the lane, pulled himself out of his trousers and jerked himself there in the car where he could still smell Aziraphale, cleaning up with the wipes he kept in the car for dirty faces and hands.

Every driving lesson ended more or less the same way, though he made it into the house and into a locked room each time after that. He worried he was going to wank himself silly at this rate. He both hoped Aziraphale would and wouldn’t take the driver’s test soon. He was going to miss the excuse to be alone with him, but wasn’t sure his body could take the self-abuse much longer

+++++++++++

“Aziraphale, you need to just take the practical test at this point. You’re driving is fine. Great even.” Newton sat in the passenger seat as they ambled around the village. It was evening and the roads were nearly empty.

“I think I need more practice, just a bit more.”

“Look, I know you just want to spend more time with Hot Dad alone in his fancy car,” Newton ignored the pout Aziraphale shot at him, “but you’re just drawing it out at this point. Just take the test and get it done.”

“I’m not trying to spend more time alone with Crowley.” Aziraphale insisted.

“Great, then it works out perfect that I’ve booked the driving test for you Friday morning.”

“You did what?”

“Eyes on the road, eyes on the road!”

“Shite!” Aziraphale quickly parked the car and turned it off with slightly trembling hands. “You did what?” He asked again.

“I booked the test, 8am sharp on Friday.”

“That’s the day before the twin’s birthday party and Crowley has work, I can’t just take the morning off – “

“I already cleared it with Crowley. It’s fine. He’s going to stay home that morning and you can head in when you’re finished with your test.”

“You ‘cleared it’ with Crowley?”

“Yeah, I stopped by his shop, finally introduced myself, and told him I was booking your test. It’s all good.”

Aziraphale chewed on his lip. “And?”

“And he’s even hotter in person. Don’t know how you do it.” Newton grinned at his younger brother.

“Oh Newton, it’s awful! Sometimes I think he’s flirting with me, and other times I think it’s all in my head because I want him to be flirting with me.”

“Dude, he bought you a kitten. He’s flirting with you.”

“Do you think so?”

“I mean, I’d have to see it in person to be sure but yeah.”

“Oh! Come to the boys party on Saturday.”

“What?”

“It will be perfect, I’ll need another set of capable hands, you can meet some parents and students, and you can watch Crowley and I, give me your opinion.”

“I mean, if he doesn’t mind, if he doesn’t think it will be weird, I guess I could go.”

“He won’t mind, I promise! Please?”

“You know I can’t say no to those puppy dog eyes, fine.”

 

++++++++++++

Crowley was watching the boys as they played on the swings in the back garden, anxiously bouncing his leg. He had checked his phone every couple of minutes but he had nothing from Aziraphale yet. He was on his second cup of coffee and thinking of pouring a third.

“There you all are!”

“Azi!” Adam jumped off his swing and ran towards the patio door that Aziraphale was walking out of and hugged his leg, Lock running to hug the other.

“Hello my boys, how are you doing today? I do hope you’ve been kind to your father?”

“Running me ragged, as usual. Hi Magpie.”

“Hello Crowley.”

They shared a smile before Crowley cleared his throat. “So, how did it go?”

“Ah, well. It could have gone better.” Aziraphale patted the boys on their heads and tried to remove them from his legs. “Honestly, you don’t have to hold on to me, I’m here the rest of the day. Go on, go and play I’ll be here.”

Adam let go first. “Tomorrow’s our birthday, remember?”

“Oh my gosh I forgot all about it! Thank goodness I have you to remind me!”

“Really?”

Aziraphale laughed. “No Adam, I remembered, trust me! Now go on. You too Lock.” He ran his fingers through Lock’s black hair gently. Lock smiled up at him and slowly let go before following Adam back to the swings. Dog, who had been sleeping under Floppy’s hutch, chased after them.

“You’re killing me here Aziraphale.” Crowley scowled. He stood and walked towards Aziraphale. “Did you pass or fail?”

“Well, I tried to refute some points there were deducted,” Aziraphale huffed. “Seemed completely ridiculous what they were deducted for.”

“Aziraphale,” Crowley growled.

“I passed!”

Crowley laughed and threw his arms around Aziraphale squeezing him tightly. “I knew you could, I’m so proud of you Magpie.”

Aziraphale buried his shocked face in Crowley’s chest and slid his arms around his narrow waist, his heart beating fast. “Thank you. For everything.”

Crowley squeezed him tighter for a moment then reluctantly let him go, stepping back. “Let me see your license picture.”

“Oh, I don’t think so.”

“Come on!”

“No, it’s horrid!”

Crowley made a show of reaching for his pocket to grab at his wallet, Aziraphale laughing and trying to move away. They ended up with Aziraphale’s back pressed against the wall, Crowley leaning over him, pinning his arms above his head.

Aziraphale’s chest heaved as he looked up into Crowley’s covered eyes and licked his lips.

“Daddy and Azi are wrestling!” Adam yelled, delighted.

Crowley dropped Aziraphale’s hands quickly and turned away, trying to adjust himself. He had half hardened during the exchange.

Aziraphale, cheeks dark red and eyes wide turned to go back into the house, Crowley catching a glimpse of the bulge straining his shorts. “Your Daddy is so silly! Who wants lemonade? I’ll make us all some lemonade!”

“Yes, lemonade sounds great.” Crowley agreed. “I’ll have a glass before I head into the shop.” The boys and Dog ran into the house, Crowley following behind. “Coward,” he muttered to himself.

+++++++++++

 

“Why are you so nervous?” Newton asked, helping Aziraphale pack up the car. Ash, formally Cy, sat on Aziraphale’s shoulder, purring loudly. He had grown in the weeks since he had been adopted, his little belly fat and round. He had found a good home with the two young men who both fawned over him and gave him more treats than he needed. He slept on Aziraphale’s pillow every night.

“I’m not nervous. Just hoping that the party goes well, that’s all. It’s such a big day for the boys.”

“I don’t think that’s it. You were super squirrely when you got home last night. Did something happen during the test? Or at work?”

“What would happen? Nothing happened! Why would you think something happened?”

“Wow, I haven’t heard your voice that high in a while. Not since you were eleven or so.”

“Everything is fine. Let’s go, please.”

The drive to the party was quiet, Ash standing on the dash looking out the windshield, Aziraphale’s hands ready to catch him if he slipped.

“Can you at least let me know if something bad happened?”

The concern in Newton’s voice was clear. “Yes, of course. You know I would.” Aziraphale worried his lip. “There was a hug that may have gotten a little out of hand.”

“Out of hand how?” Newton sounded alarmed.

“Oh, nothing like that Newton, I promise. I really wanted it to get out of hand actually, and it may have, but the boys…”

“Az, I know I joke about the whole Hot Dad thing but there is a real imbalance of power thing happening here. He’s your boss, he pays your salary and he’s older than you. If he’s pressuring you into anything - ”

“He’s not, I promise he’s not! He’s been a perfect gentleman.”

“Alright, I believe you, but I’ll be watching for sure now.”

“Oh, my big brother is going to protect me is he?”

“I’ve done it before!”

“Yes, when we were children and it always ended up rather bad for you, didn’t it?” Aziraphale smiled, lost in memory for a minute. “I just wish I knew that what he wanted.”

“Maybe you should ask him what he wants? Or tell him what you want?”

“I couldn’t do that!”

Newton sighed. “No, of course not, why would you.” Newton pulled up to the house and parked off to the side. “How weird is this going to be?”

“Probably a little. I’m sorry, you can head home.”

“No, no. I said I’d help and here I am, helping.” Newton offered a smile. “Come on, let’s go give those kids a heck of a birthday party!”

 

++++++++++

Crowley was in hell. Hell was his back garden full of screaming kids high on sugar. The small bouncy castle was a hit (Bea had taken their own turn, they were so tiny they were under the weight limit). There were balloons and streamers everywhere and Dog was having the time of his life chasing after all the extra children. Floppy was in his outside hutch munching away and taking in everything surprisingly calmly while Ash was in his own outside crate in the shade for now. The childless adults were huddled together in a back corner while poor Newton was being accosted by the parents of Pepper, Brian and Jeremy.

Aziraphale floated through all the chaos smoothly. He was there to wipe a dirty face or kiss a scrapped knee. He was there to pour another glass of lemonade or find a lost shoe. He laughed and spoke with all the adults. Except Crowley.

Well, they spoke. ‘Hello, how are you, I think the table should go there, where did all these balloons come from?’ sort of thing but nothing more than that.

“Hello Duck, enjoying the party?” Tracey slid her hand in the crook of Crowley’s arm and gave him a squeeze.

“Oh yeah, it’s just my scene.”

“The boys are happy, look at them! You did ‘em proud Dad.”

“Nah, it was all Magpie. I just paid for it all.”

“OOohh, ‘Magpie’ is it?” Tracey poked him.

“Shut it.”

“Yooohoo! Aziraphale!” Tracey called. “Come take a break and give us a jabber will you?”

“Anything for you Tracey.” Aziraphale jogged over and wiped his forehead on the back of his arm. He grabbed a drink from the table near by and chugged it quickly. “How’s everything here on the adult side?”

“Oh, just peachy hun, just peachy. But you know, I was trying to figure out just how many of us here has seen you starkers.”

Crowley choked on his lemonade. “Jesus Tracey.”

“Oh really Tracey,” Aziraphale tittered. “Not really conversation for a child’s birthday party now is it?”

“Oh, they’re all off having a time, look at them!”

Despite being told that only two could bounce in the castle at the same time, all five of them were in there now, screaming and giggling.

“Oh dear, I had better – “

Tracey reached out with her free hand and took hold of Aziraphale’s arm. “Take a break, they’re fine! Now, Anathema and I have seen you starkers, and Rose here.”

Rose raised her own cup. “Sure have!” Uriel, her wife, made a distasteful sound.

“Is that it then? Here at the party?” Tracey asked, eyebrows raised.

“Well, I had the misfortune on more then one occasion.” Newton spoke up.

“We were children!”

“Still.” Newton did a play of shuddering.

Anathema snorted and then blushed. Newton gave her a little smile.

“How do you end up doing that sort of thing? Posing with your tackle out?” Hastur asked.

“Oh, well, I saw the notice at the community center, right after we moved here. I had done some modeling in Uni, and it was always an easy way to make a bit of cash. In Uni I had an art prof approach me and tell me that I had a good figure for modeling and would I like to make a bit of cash and…oh dear.” Aziraphale looked to Newton. “Do you think it was possible he was…hitting on me?”

Newton threw his arms up in the air. “People are always hitting on you Aziraphale but you’re bind do it! Makes me feel REALLY great when we’re out together and everyone is making eyes at you, let me tell you, but yes, Professor Perv was hitting in you. Why do you think I walked you to and from those jobs? He was always trying to corner you afterwards.”

“He had to be sixty! And he wore a ring!” Aziraphale looked horrified. “I was 19!”

“Ah, lust knows no age limits.” Tracey said wisely.

“Goodness. I’m feeling a bit squidgy.” Aziraphale disentangled himself from Tracey and sat down heavily in a near by lawn chair.

“You’re very pretty pet, I’m sure that you’ve had a lot of admirers over the years. Lots of girlfriends?”

Aziraphale gave Tracey a look.

“Ha! Boyfriends then?”

“Oh yes, are you seeing anyone here in the village yet? I have a cousin who would be perfect for you!” Rose said, excitedly.

“Your cousin Ronnie is perfect for no one.” Uriel commented.

“Oh, you!” Rose giggled.

“Not much of a gay scene here in Tadfield but you should come down to the pub sometime, pretty thing like you could pull easily enough.” Ligur laughed.

Crowley gritted his teeth and stared straight ahead.

“Azi!” Adam yelled from the bouncy castle.

“Oh thank god,” Aziraphale jumped up from his chair and quickly made his way across the garden to the castle.

“My but he’s cagey isn’t he?” Tracey tutted.

“Not everyone wants to discuss “pulling” at a kids party.” Crowley grumbled.

“Crowley would like to talk to Aziraphale about pulling something.” Bea snorted.

“Can you kindly fuck off?” Crowley hissed.

Newton made a horrified sound and Anathema laughed again.

“This is amazing,” she snorted. “I’m so glad I came today.”

“Oh really?” Rose asked coming closer. “I didn’t know you two were an item?”

“We’re not, of course we’re not.” Crowley said. He pulled his arm away from Tracey and shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Oh, but you want to be.” Rose said, understanding dawning on her.

“Rose, this isn’t something that you need to be involved in.” Uriel commented.

“I think that it’s cake time, isn’t it cake time? Magpie,” Crowley yelled, “is it time for cake?”

“Yay!” Adam yelled, falling out of the bouncy castle. “I want cake now!”

“Oh, alright, we can do cake now.” He threw a questioning look towards Crowley but shrugged his shoulders. “I’ll just go get it.

“I’ll help.” Crowley moved towards the patio doors.

“I’m sure you will,” Anathema mumbled.

“Shut it!”

++++++++

Twenty minutes later the parents were trying to wrangle their children who were covered in chocolate cake and ice cream. Aziraphale strode into the fray “Eyes up here! Thank you!” He somehow formed a line of children and was wiping faces and hands clean. “My, my Brian, how did you manage to get cake in your ear?”

Brian shrugged and grinned.

“Alright everyone, now that you’ve had your cake and treats, I think your parents are wanting to take you home now.”

“Awwwwww”

“I know, I know, we’ve had such a lovely day! Adam, Lock, do you have something to say to your friends?”

“Thank you for the presents!”

“Thank you Adam. Lock, did you want to say anything?”

“Thank you for coming to our party.” Lock said quietly.

Crowley’s heart swooped in his chest. Lock had always been the shy one out of the pair, always more than willing to let Adam speak for him.

“Ah, wonderful, well said darling boy.” Aziraphale beamed at him. “Now, before you go everyone, I’d like you to come over here by Floppy, hello Floppy! As you can see, we have a bag of treats for you to take home (He pointed to a small table with brown paper bags, each child’s name (including Lock and Adam) printed in big colorful letters on it.

“Oh good, more sugar.” Brian’s Mom sighed.

“We also have this little bin of friends who need a new home.” He pulled a sheet off a box filled with stuffed dogs, cats and bunnies. “Would you all like to adopt one to take home?”

It was like a frenzy, the kids pulling the stuffed toys out of the box, hugging them, trading for one they wanted more. Eventually everyone was happy and Aziraphale pulled out ‘adoption papers’ and painstakingly filled each one out for all the children.

“You’ve got a real treasure there,” Rose said, coming up close to Crowley. “He’s wonderful with all the kids.”

“Yes, he’s really something. He’s been bringing Lock out of his shell a bit.” Crowley watched with a smile.

“If I was a worse person, I might try to steal him away from you, but we don’t really need a Nanny.” Rose laughed. “Hold on to him though, other parents will try to steal him from you once school starts.”

“I intend to.”

 

++++++++++

An hour later all the kids had long since gone home, the twins had fallen asleep early after crashing and burning (two tantrums and a couple of foot stomps later they were both sleeping in bed. Dog slept at Adam’s feet, his old stuffed dog and new one (Adam knew what he liked) under each arm. Floppy was safe in his cage at the end of Lock’s bed, his stuffed duck and new stuffed bunny cuddled up to him.

Tracey had gone home when the children and parents left, mentioning that she had an important “appointment” to get ready for. The other adults had stayed to clean up the mess and pack up all the party supplies. They were all sitting around the back yard now, drinks in hand, relaxing after the busy day.

Ash was up in Aziraphale’s arms as he leaned back in his chair between Newton and Crowley.

“How many of those monsters will you be teaching next year? You sure you’re ready for that?” Bea asked Newton.

“Well, I don’t intend to stuff the kids full of sugar and cake every day but yeah, I’m more then a little unnerved right now.” He ran his fingers through his hair.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine, you seem capable enough.” Anathema said, nudging him with her foot.

Crowley caught her eye and raised an eyebrow at her. Anathema quickly looked away.

“Well done today Magpie,” Crowley drawled, stretching his legs and bumping one of Aziraphale’s feet.

“Oh, thank you. It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing. You gave the boys one hell of a day.” Crowley was earnest.

“Might have to get you to plan my next birthday party.” Hastur joked.

“Will you be wanting a bouncy castle as well?” Aziraphale asked sweetly.

“Hell, I want one of those.” Bea said. “You did good Blondie, was a hell of day.”

“Thank you. I think I’ll go home and sleep for 16 hours or so.” He yawned.

“Go on, get out of here. I’ll see you Monday.” Crowley nudged him again.

“Are you sure? I could drop by tomorrow if you need me.”

“No, you’ve earned a break from those chaos machines.” Crowley stood up and stretched, then reached a hand down to Aziraphale.

Aziraphale gathered Ash up in one hand and reached his other towards Crowley who hauled him up.

“Hey, Lizard boy, stop flirting with the witch and take your brother home, he’s dead on his feet.”

“Newts are amphibians, not reptiles, I think?” Newton said, standing up and stretching himself while Anathema sputtered and blushed.

“Oh boy, if you’re teaching five-year-olds, you gotta know your animals.” Crowley laughed.

“Um. I need my hand.” Aziraphale said softly.

“Oh shit,” Crowley realized with horror he was still holding onto the younger man’s soft hand. “Sorry, tired I guess.”

Aziraphale smiled up at him. “I’ll see you on Monday Crowley.”

“See you on Monday Magpie.” He watched as the two men waved to everyone and then made their way out of the back garden, closing the gate behind them. He listened for the sound of slamming car doors before turning back around to his friends.

“Holy fuck, you got it baaaaad.” Bea laughed.

Crowley all but collapsed in his lawn chair.

Hastur was doubled over. “You were holding his hand! I’ve never seen you like this before! You’re so fucking stupid!”

“Alright, thank you for that. I’m happy that my pain can bring some joy to the people who are supposed to be my friends. Can we at least talk about how Ana was flirting with the teacher?”

“Oh, we’ll get there, but we’re not done laughing about you yet.” LIgur sneered.

“Trust me, you can’t make me feel any more stupid about this. I’ve almost kissed him twice now, when the boys were around, without you know, talking to him? I’m acting like an idiot.”

“Crowley and Blondie up in a tree,” Ana said in a sing song voice. “K-i-s-s-i-n-g”

“He wishes.” Bea snorted again.

“Right now I wish you were all dead.” Crowley grumbled.

The garden erupted in laughter that Crowley couldn’t help but join in on.

Chapter 7

Summary:

Crowley buys Aziraphale a non-gift gift.

Bea and Crowley make a deal.

It was a week after the boy’s party and Aziraphale’s heart still fluttered like a Victorian maiden’s when he thought about the way Crowley had gripped his hand at the end of the night. His hand was large, much larger than Aziraphale’s own hand. It had calluses from hours spent working outside, digging in soil and uprooting rocks. Aziraphale was already planning on getting him some high-quality hand cream as part of his Christmas gift that year, and what he wouldn’t do to be able to paint those nails! He imagined them black or maybe navy blue with a galaxy of silver sparkles. He shook his head to clear his thoughts as he made his way up the long and winding driveway where he paused. Parked neatly next to Crowley’s black sporty car was a shiny blue utility vehicle. It was early for visitors, not yet 7am. Crowley must have bought a second car, strange that he hadn’t mentioned it. Or perhaps Crowley had had an overnight visitor who hadn’t left yet? He was free to do so, of course but Aziraphale’s stomach felt heavy with dread. Would he have to make small talk with Crowley’s lover over tea and toast? Taking a calming breath he turned the key in the lock and tucked his shoes in the corner before heading into the kitchen where Crowley was drinking a cup of coffee. Alone.

“’Morning Magpie.”

“Good morning Crowley, are the boys still sleeping?” He kept his voice light while he tried not to frantically look around.

“Yeah, you tired them out well yesterday, thanks for that.” Crowley smiled over his black mug.

“I’ll confess, I went to bed quite early myself.” He put his backpack on one of the kitchen stools. “I saw another car in the drive this morning.” He tried for a casual tone.

“Do you like it? She’s pretty isn’t she?”

Aziraphale wrinkled his nose. “She?”

“Yeah, a Ford Puma, brand new, do you like the color? Just brought her home yesterday.”

“Yes, it’s a very nice blue, though I can’t imagine you driving anything that isn’t black my dear. It looks like it has plenty of space for the boys and dog.” Aziraphale could have jumped for joy. A second vehicle meant there wasn’t another person waiting to sneak out of the house before the boys woke.

“Oh, I won’t be driving it.”

“I’m confused. You bought a new car to look at?”

Crowley slid a set of car keys across the grey granite countertop. “I uh, bought it for you. So you could drop the kids off at school if I couldn’t take them, and pick them up.”

Aziraphale stared at the keys and said nothing.

Crowley continued, scratching the back of his neck. “The weather’s going to turn any day now, and the lane will be muddy. You’ll be in a right state getting here and back to your flat every day and I know you don’t like to ask people for help so yeah. I bought a second car. You know. For you. For the kids! For you as a Nanny to drive the kids.” He took a gulp of his coffee and willed Aziraphale to say something, anything.

“You bought a car.” Aziraphale said very slowly, looking hard at the keys on the counter.

“Yup.”

“So I wouldn’t get muddy?” Aziraphale looked puzzled. “Am I to take the car home with me at night?”

“Well, yeah, it’s yours. I mean, it’s mine, I’m paying for it, but it’s yours to use. Whenever you want, like a perk, or benefit of the job.”

Aziraphale reached for the keys. “Mine to use. For work.”

“Well, whenever you like, after work. You know, I don’t need it, you take it home with you, at night, on the weekends, you know, whenever.”

“Alright.” Aziraphale spoke slowly.

“You wanna go look at her, start her up? You could take her for a test drive, I’m in no hurry to get to work this morning. Or any morning really.”

“I’ll just go take a look, shall I?” Aziraphale asked uncertainly.

“Yeah, go on.”

Aziraphale retraced his steps and found himself looking at the blue car up close. He walked around it slowly, trailing his fingers lightly over it before unlocking the driver’s side and sliding in. He took a moment to adjust the seat and turned the key in the ignition. He was too stunned to form a coherent thought and suddenly broke out into giggles. “Crowley bought me a fucking car,” he said incredulously to no one and laughed harder.

Crowley had waited until the door was closed before scrambling to the window. He could feel himself sweating as he watched Aziraphale approach the car carefully, as if it was something dangerous. His stomach felt sour, from anxiety and too much coffee, too little sleep. It had seemed like a great idea when he had first thought of it. Part of the reason why he had pushed Aziraphale to learn how to drive was so he could drive the kids to and from school when they started. The fact that he didn’t have his own car was only a minor inconvenience, one that Crowley could throw some money at and solve. Part of him hoped maybe Aziraphale would be impressed, or thankful. He wasn’t expecting anything in return, he wasn’t a pig. A smile would be enough.

Peering out he watched as Aziraphale got into the car and started it up and then…laughed? Was he laughing? Crowley’s nervousness climbed higher. He quickly made his way back to the kitchen so he wasn’t caught spying on the younger man like a complete creep.

Aziraphale came back into the house a few minutes later, cheeks a dusty pink. “I don’t know what to say Crowley, I really don’t.”

“It’s nothing. Practical.”

Aziraphale hummed. “Not sure many would agree with you. Newton is going to be green with envy. It’s, well, beautiful.”

“Glad you like it Magpie.” Anything to make you happy, Crowley almost said but managed to stop himself.

 

++++++

“That’s a nice car Blondie got himself.” Bea was helping Crowley with a wedding order and only grumbling a little about it.

“Yup.”

“I knew you were paying him well but I didn’t think he’d have that much saved up yet.” Bea watched Crowley as he wrapped rose stems in hemp. “Must be pretty excited about it. Saw him driving the boys to the shops yesterday.”

“Yeah. It’s nice.”

“And you bought it.”

“And I bought it.” Crowley sighed.

Bea threw the bunch of flowers they were working on at him. “You absolute twat. Trying out for the Sugar Daddy position now?”

“Ugh, don’t call me that.” Crowley frowned.

“Well, you bought the hot young thing a fucking car Crowley, what would you call it?”

“I don’t know! It seemed like a good idea! He needs a car to drive the kids around, he doesn’t have a car so I bought him a car. Simple!”

“If he’s got you this twisted up now, what will it be like when you’re actually banging him?”

“Hey, don’t.” Crowley frowned.

“I don’t mean anything bad. I like him.”

Crowley stared. “You don’t like anyone.”

“True. He’s like, I don’t know, a ray of god damn sunshine walking around. I’ve seen you smile a lot lately. An unnerving amount. I mean, don’t get me wrong, you were always great with the kids. Here at work though, and out in the village...it’s good to see you looking happier.” They looked at Crowley for a second. “When’s the last time you’ve had a proper shag?”

“Jesus Bea.”

“That long huh? Been at least five years is my guess. That’s like a lifetime for an old slut like you.” Bea snorted.

“Thank you very much, I’m not an ‘old slut’. I had my fair share of partners back in uni, but after moving back here, well, like the guys said at the party there’s not much of a gay scene here in town. I was trying to get this business up and running and that wasn’t exactly making me horny. Fuck, do you remember how awful that was? Then Harry showed up out of the blue with the boys and shit. It has been a few.” Crowley continued wrapping flower stems for a few long moments, lost in thought. “It’s not just, you know, shagging that I want from him.”

Bea bumped him. “I know. Ya gotta stop acting like an idiot over him though and just have a conversation. Like an adult.”

“Oh that’s rich coming from you. You’ve been staring at Dana for years.”

Bea colored. “I have not been looking at Dana for years.”

Crowley snorted. “Sure.”

“Alright tough guy, fine, I’ll ask Dana the Queen of City Hall out if you ask your hot little Nanny out.”

Crowley smiled. “Oh it’s tempting. Mostly because I know you’d never do it.”

Bea held out their hand. “Shake on it then?” When Crowley hesitated Bea snickered. “I knew it, you’re such a chicken shit.”

Crowley grabbed their hand and shook it firmly.

Bea grimaced. “Alright we got a deal.”

“And don’t we both look thrilled about it?”

Notes:

Alright, so I do know enough about traffic laws that Aziraphale wouldn't be able to drive the twins around as a brand new driver (at least here in Canada) but we're just going to pretend that everything is on the up and up here.

Also, full disclosure I googled "Top cars in the UK" and the Ford Puma was such an awesome blue it had to be the car

Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed this little piece of fluff

Chapter 8

Summary:

It's the first day of school and nerves are a bit frazzled.
Crowley slips up (again) and a "date" is made

“Do you really think they will be alright?”

Crowley looked over at Aziraphale who’s eyes were wet, grateful for the cover of his own sunglasses. It was the first day of school and it had been a doozy of a morning so far. Getting the boys settled in bed the night before after baths and story time had been a whole Thing. Adam had been near frantic with excitement and Lock with nerves. Then there was the struggle of getting the boys in their unfamiliar uniforms the next morning (Aziraphale had shown up in a short-sleeved baby blue button up and bright blue bowtie in solidarity, nearly making Crowley weak in the knees.) but they succeeded. The school was a hive of activity verging on chaos with harried looking parents and hyperactive children, half of them sniffling or wailing. Once faced with the school gates, Adam promptly burst into tears and Lock froze like a statue, a look of panic on his face.

Exchanging looks with one another Aziraphale scooped up Lock and spoke quietly to him while Crowley squatted down and hugged Adam to him while giving him a pep talk. Adam cried harder and Lock began to whimper so they traded twins and eventually got them if not completely calm then calmer then they were before. Lock no longer looked terrified and Adam’s tears had been dried.

Newton arrived in his suit (slightly rumpled already) with his clipboard in hand and started to round up the children in his class. Pepper strode forward bravely away from her mothers who were both holding back tears (Uriel much more successfully than Rose). Crowley and Aziraphale walked the twins over and Aziraphale leaned close to Newton whispering something in his ear. Newton laughed and pushed him away but looked less nervous than before.

Crowley had led Aziraphale back to the car, his hand hovering on the small of his back. “They will be fine but I’m not going to be if I stay here much longer though.”

“I don’t know what I’m going to do with myself.” Aziraphale confessed. “I know I’ve only been their Nanny for a short time, but I feel quite lost at the moment.”

“You’re lost? Ha! what about me?” Crowley opened the door for Aziraphale who flashed him a bright smile. Once the man was safely inside he closed the door and strutted around to the other side. “I’ll take you back to the house, you can get your car.” Crowley drummed his fingers on the steering wheel.

“Remember, you promised to take Dog to work with you today and to sit with Floppy for a while.”

“Yes, I remember. Why did I get those flea bags again?”

“Because you knew that they would make your boys so very happy.”

“Right, that’s why. How’s Ash?”

Aziraphale’s face lit up. “Oh he’s amazing! He’s growing so much and he’s got such a funny personality. I’ll have to bring him to work soon so you and the boys can see him. He’s so soft! I brush him every night and he sleeps on my pillow beside me. Soon I’ll have to give it up to him, he’ll take up the whole thing!”

‘Adorable’ was all Crowley could think. The image of Aziraphale tucked in his bed with the black one-eyed kitten curled in a ball on his pillow next to his soft face…a ding interrupted his thoughts.

Aziraphale pulled out his phone. “It’s Rose. She wants to know if we can meet at the pub at lunch time.”

“Both of us?”

“Yes dear. She says that Uriel has a ‘proposition to discuss’. My, that sounds a tad ominous doesn’t’ it?”

Crowley grinned “Let’s do lunch Magpie.”

+++++++

After a morning spent puttering around the house making sure that both Dog and Floppy lots of attention, Crowley and Aziraphale made their way back to the village. Crowley had insisted on driving them there, leaving the other car behind again.

“I’m taking the day Magpie. We’ll putter around the village until the end of the school day and pick the boys up. No sense in bringing two cars.” After parking the car near the pub, Crowley again rushed around to open Aziraphale’s door for him. Aziraphale blushed and said a quiet ‘thank you’ while Crowley hovered his hand over the small of Aziraphale’s back before gently placing his hand there and leading him on to the pub.

Aziraphale tensed for a second, heart beating wildly then forced himself to relax. There was a part of him that had believed Crowley had bought that car as a grand gesture, some sort of a sign or signal of…wanting more out of their arrangement for lack of a better world. Things had stayed largely the same however, much to Aziraphale’s disappointment. Now, with Crowley’s hand on his lower back, hot as a brand, he felt like he could fly.

Crowley’s own heart was beating wildly as he felt the warmth from Aziraphale’s back seep into his hand. He had felt the man tense for a second and was about to pull his hand back when Aziraphale had seemed to relax into the touch.

“Over here you two!” Crowley’s head snapped to a table where Rose was waving her hand calling to them.

“Hiya! How are you two holding up? I’ve cried more this morning then I have in years I think!” Rose dabbed at her red eyes with a tissue.

“Oh you know, stiff upper lip and all that.” Crowley teased as he sat down in a free chair.

Aziraphale leaned over and kissed Rose on the cheek before sitting next to Crowley. “There there Rose. I’m sure Pepper is leading the class by now, probably has poor Newton tied up in the corner.”

Uriel smiled and Rose let out a watery laugh, leaning into her wife.

“So what’s this all about anyway?” Crowley drawled, folding his long legs under the table, bumping knees with Aziraphale.

“Oh, my cleaver Uriel has such a good plan!” Rose said happily. “Just you wait.”

Drinks and food were ordered and then Uriel got down to business. “We know that our children get alone quite well, and I think that we, as parents, get on reasonably well.”

“You’re really selling it Babe,” Rose laughed. “Look, it’s hard as Queer parents in a small village,” she made a sweeping motion, “and being Black to boot. It’s a good Village, people aren’t horrible, just…awkward? It’s so great when you can get along with people and have the kids get on like a house on fire too.”

“Yes,” Uriel continued. “As Rose was saying, we all seem to get along as a group and we thought that perhaps it might be nice to reap some benefits?”

“Benefits?” Crowley asked before taking a sip of his pint.

“I thought that some sort of an arrangement could be made. When’s the last time you’ve had a night to yourself Crowley?”

Crowley blew out a long breath. “A whole night? Before the boys came along.”

“Oh you poor thing!” Aziraphale squeezed Crowley’s forearm. “You should have told me! I’d be more than happy to stay late or come over on the weekend so you can have a night to yourself.”

Crowley smiled at him. “It’s nothing. Got used to it.”

Uriel nodded. “I was thinking we could pool our resources and help one another with that. If we have sleep overs for the kids two Saturdays of every month that’s one Saturday night kid free. You could drop the boys off next Saturday afternoon and pick them after lunch on Sunday. That gives you almost 24 hours of freedom.”

“We love our Pepper. Dearly. But the thought of 24 hours to ourselves,” Rose smiled dreamily. “We could all do with a date night here and there, couldn’t we?” She stared at Crowley pointedly.

“Ngk.” Crowley coughed. “Look, if you think you can handle my two along with your firecracker, I’m game.” Crowley thought about having a free Saturday every month. He could sleep in! He could ask Aziraphale out for a proper meal. He could take him home and shag him into the mattress and not worry about the boys waking up and walking in on them. He shook his head. One thing at a time.

“Oh, I could come by and help you when it’s your turn to host if you’d like, even stay the night like a big sleep over! It could be fun!” Aziraphale pushed his salad away and sipped his water.

Crowley cleared his throat. “Yup, fun. I’m game.”

Rose smiled broadly. “Right, so next weekend you drop off your wee ones and enjoy a free night!”

Glasses were clinked, the food was finished, and the bills were taken care of (Crowley grabbed Aziraphale’s before he could) and so longs were made. They would see each other again at the school gates soon enough.

They parked the car close to the school and walked towards Crowley’s shop where they whiled away the afternoon with Crowley’s friends and co-workers. Crowley was admiring Aziraphale’s arse while he was leaned over the counter speaking to Bea when his phone dinged. He dug it out of his pocket and opened a new message from Ana and then jumped, juggling the phone before it hit the poured concrete floors.

“What on earth?” Aziraphale questioned.

“Nothing! Nothing. Just, uh, gotta call Ana. You know. Witch troubles.” Crowley scuttled into his office and slammed the door, pressing his back against it. He stabbed the call button.

“Helllllloooo?”

“What the hell are you playing at?” Crowley hissed.

“Is that how you greet me when I send you such a lovely gift? I thought you could use some cheering up today.” Anathema snorted into the phone.

“I’m going to kill you.” Crowley looked at the file Anathema had sent him. It had been taken at her one of her art classes and showed Aziraphale posed on some sort of fainting couch, bare except for a sheet draped just barely over his genitals and pooling dramatically on the floor around him. The curve of his backside clearly on display.

“You’re awful quiet, are you drooling?”

“I hate you.”

“You love me. Is it everything you’ve been dreaming of?”

Crowley gulped. “Obviously! Feels wrong though, dirty.”

“He knows I took the picture, it’s all on the up and up, and I bet he’d be thrilled to know that you’ll be looking at it tonight….during some alone time.”

“Christ sake Ana, do you think you can manage to keep it in your pants?”

There was a knock on the door that nearly made Crowley toss his phone again. “Crowley? My Dear it’s almost time to pick up the boys.”

“Shit!” Crowley stabbed at his phone screen, ending the call and closing out of the picture before slamming the damned thing back in his pocket. “Coming Magpie!” He ripped open the door to face a startled Aziraphale.

“Is everything alright? You look flushed.”

Crowley thought of all the ways he could murder his meddling friend. “Oh you know, Ana was just being irritating on purpose.”

“Really? She’s only ever been kind to me.”

“Hey, Arsehole!” Bea shouted.

“Yes?”

“Blondie told me about your free Saturday night coming up. Why don’t we do a pub night? Invite everyone. Been a dog’s age since you’ve had a free night, might as well celebrate it. You can invite your brother.” They motioned to Aziraphale.

“Oh, I’m sure he’d enjoy that.”

“Dana usually goes to the pub Saturday nights doesn’t she?” Crowley asked, grinning wildly.

Bea gritted their teeth. “Yeah, think she does.”

“I’ll text her, shall I? She should join us.”

Bea forced a smile. “Yeah, it will be nice to be out for the night, you, me, Dana, Aziraphale.” She stressed his name. “Anything could happen on a Saturday night at the Flaming Sword.”

“If I didn’t know any better, that’s the perfect name for a gay bar.” Aziraphale chuckled happily, oblivious to the sneers the two old friends were trading.

“It’s a date.”

“Is it now?”

“So, should we be going?” Aziraphale motioned towards the door. “Wouldn’t want them to be waiting for us on their first day!”

“Go get your brats, we’ll talk later.” Bea waved them off.

“Chao,” Crowley twiddled his fingers before putting his hand on Aziraphale’s back and shooting Bea a triumphant look.

“Doesn’t count!”

Crowley slammed the door.

“What do they m –“

“Who knows with them? This way Angel.”

Aziraphale gasped and stumbled. “Angel?”

FUCK. “Oh shit, there’s the bell, we better hurry.” He pushed Aziraphale along, taking long strides.

Aziraphale hurried to keep up. “I didn’t hear a bell.”

“Really? I heard it loud and clear. Try to keep up Magpie.”

Aziraphale huffed as he tried to keep up with the long-legged man who seemed determined to get to the school as quickly as possible. When they got there the bell hadn’t in fact rung and they were among the first parents milling around the gates to pick up their children. “Crowley, what on earth has gotten into you?”

“Huh, must be these old ears of mine.” Crowley stared hard at the school building, willing the bell to ring.

“Hiya again!” Rose walked up hand in hand with Uriel and threw her free arm around Aziraphale.

“Thank Christ,” Crowley muttered under his breath. “Hi Rose, Uriel.”

The four made small talk while more parents gathered around them and waited for the bell to ring. When it finally did there was a flurry of activity before they all finally got ahold of their children again.

“Papa!” Warlock yelled as he ran towards Crowley and was scooped up in a massive hug.

“Hey Lock, I missed you! Did you have a good day? Where’s that brother of yours?” Crowley squeezed the boy tight making him giggle.

“We drawed so many pictures today!”

“Did you now?”

“That’s wonderful darling. Oh look, there’s your brother now.” Aziraphale pointed towards Adam who was running with Pepper towards them.

Adam was swept up in Crowley’s arms next to his brother and was squeezed just as tight.

“Did you have a good day Adam?”

“It was brilliant!”

“Oh, I’m so pleased!” Aziraphale stood on tiptoes to kiss each boy on the cheek. “I’ll just go speak to Mr. Pulsifer for a mo.”

Crowley watched Aziraphale as he reached his brother and gave him a quick hug as they spoke and laughed. His attention was pulled back to Adam who was chattering about a picture of a dinosaur pirate captain that he had drawn while Lock was telling him excitedly about the tall slide in the playground. “Sounds like you both had a fantastic day. We should celebrate, what do you want for dinner tonight? We’ll go anywhere you two want to go if you can agree on a place.” Crowley set both boys down on their feet and watched with an amused smile as Lock whispered in Adam’s.

“We want chicken nuggets!”

“Hey Magpie,” Crowley called, “can we tempt you to a Big Mac for dinner?”

“Temptation accomplished!”

Chapter 9

Summary:

It's Saturday night at the Flaming Sword and anything can happen.
New relationships can blossom and new friendships can be made.

Notes:

Just a slight CW about childhood drama. I don't go into great detail but there is some mention of drug use and child abandonment.

Take care of yourselves and thank you for reading

“Why are you so nervous?”

Aziraphale looked to his open bedroom door where Newton was watching him. He had been agonizing over what to wear to the pub for an hour now. Crowley had texted him a picture that afternoon of the boys with Pepper and her Mum’s waving at the camera. ‘c u 2nite’ the text had read. Aziraphale had sighed when he saw the terrible grammar and knew that’s exactly why Crowley had sent it that way. It still managed to make his heart beat terribly fast. Newton was wearing dark corduroy trousers and a soft brown jumper and looked so relaxed Aziraphale could spit. “Help!” he cried pathetically.

“Oh boy. Ok, how about we try breathing for a minute?” Newton surveyed the clothing that had been dumped on the bed, Ash sleeping in the middle of it. “It’s not Pride so I think we can put the rainbow booty shorts away where they belong. It’s not a job interview so you probably don’t need the ironed trousers and button-downs.”

“I think Crowley liked me in the bow tie on the first day of school.” Aziraphale mused, remembering the way Crowley had seemed to stare at him when he had opened the door that morning (damn those sunglasses!).

“Can I ask a serious question?”

“Always.”

“What are your expectations for tonight?”

“I want Crowley’s tongue in my mouth.”

Newton blinked slowly. “Ok. We’re doing this.” Newton dug around in the clothes, went to the closet and finally had an outfit put together. “Put that on.” He turned and headed for the living room.

Aziraphale came out of the bedroom in a tight white t-shirt with a v neck, a tartan shirt in soft blues open and a pair of dark wash jeans.

“He hasn’t seen you in jeans before, you’ve been wearing shorts all summer.” Newton nodded at the outfit.

“I have nice legs.” The blond mumbled before heading to the bathroom and opening his makeup bag. He hadn’t worn anything really since he had moved to the village but it was Saturday night and it felt like a time to celebrate. He was soon happy with the way his face looked, the way his hair sat sort of tamed and the way his clothes felt. “What do you think?” He did a little twirl for Newton.

“I think we’ll have to be careful not to step on Crowley’s jaw.”

Aziraphale giggled. “I doubt that but thank you. I feel better now.” He threw his arms around his brother and snapped a couple of pics before posting one to Instagram. “Alright, let’s go before I change my mind and put something else on.”

After saying goodbye to a sleeping Ash they headed out the door and began the walk to the pub. “Maybe this is a bad idea.” Aziraphale felt jittery.

“Alright, can you tell me what might be bad about it?” Newton asked patiently. “We are going to drinks with a group of people who will hopefully become our friends. Nothing more than that needs to happen tonight Az.” He adjusted his glasses. “There doesn’t have to be any higher expectations here. I know that you are…pining? Lusting? Something after Crowley but you don’t need to put pressure on yourself. This is one night. One night of your life and you are going to have a couple of drinks and laugh at a few stories and that’s all that needs happen. There doesn’t have to be a giant declaration of love or fucking in the alley way.”

“Newton!”

Newton grinned. “I can say ‘fucking’ if I want to.”

“But you shouldn’t! Think of the children!” Aziraphale clutched his imaginary pearls. “I hate how smart you are sometimes.”

“Gee thanks.” They had reached the Flaming Sword. “Ready?”

“Ready.”

 

Crowley had been watching the door for fifteen minutes now. Maybe he wasn’t going to come. He didn’t have to. There was no obligation.

“You’re shaking the whole building with the bouncing of your stupid giraffe leg.” Bea complained into their pint. “He’ll be here. He’s young, 8 is early for them to come out.”

Crowley stopped bouncing his leg and took a gulp of his own pint. “Sorry.” He picked up his phone again. No new text from Aziraphale or Rose. Rose had sent a picture of the three kids in their pajamas smiling for the camera half an hour ago and nothing since then.

“They he is.” Bea motioned with their head towards the pub doors. Newton led the way into the pub and ambled his way towards the bar where Shadwell eyed the newcomers. Aziraphale spotted Crowley and his group in the back corner and sent them a smile and a wave before following his brother. After an exchange which had Newton laughing, they made their way over to the crowded tables pulled together.

“Hiya Magpie,” Crowley motioned to the free chair beside him then swallowed hard. Aziraphale was wearing jeans, something he had never seen him wear before. The white t-shirt he was wearing was tight and showed his slightly padded frame. Shit, was he wearing eye liner?

“Hello Crowley, hello everyone! How are you doing my dear, empty nest and all?”

“Bit weird but I could get used to it. What was that all about up at the bar?”

“Yeah, what did old Shadwell say to you?” Hastur asked, his arm slung easily around Ligur’s shoulders.

Newton snorted into his cider.

Aziraphale huffed. “He asked to see my ID! He’s seen me naked at Anathema’s art classes but he made me show my ID before he’d serve me!”

The table erupted in chuckles as Aziraphale sipped his gin and tonic, cheeks already rosy.

Crowley’s mind flashed on the picture that Anathema had shared of one of those art classes and he felt his own cheeks warm.

“So, you two are brothers? You don’t look anything alike.” Anathema smiled at Newton who sat beside her, across from Aziraphale.

“Adopted,” both men said at the same time.

“Oh, I see. So your birth parents?”

“Jesus Ana,” Crowley snipped. “Boundaries.”

“We don’t talk about them. Now if you want to hear about our amazing Mum then we’ll talk for hours.”

“Something we learned from her.” Aziraphale added, a feeling of unease in his belly. Getting into either of their so called ‘tragic backstories’ really wasn’t on his to do list tonight.

Newton snorted. “Yeah, so our Mum was a nun, and she chucked that away, became a kick ass social worker. I ended up with her when I was ten and a couple of years later this scrawny blond thing showed up and wouldn’t leave,” he pointed at Aziraphale and made a face, then chuckled. “She adopted us both not long after that, so we got to stay. It was pretty great.”

The table was quiet for a while until Bea spoke up. “Yeah, we all got some pretty shit parents here at this table, don’t we?”

There were nods all around.

“Mine were just not cut out to be parents, never should have stayed together. When you knock up a teenage girl with twins though, you do the ‘right thing’ and marry ‘em.” Crowley grumbled. “Old man was worse than useless. Don’t know that he ever kept a job for more then a few months. Ma managed to get her nursing degree by some miracle, though god knows she wasn’t very loving at home, me and Harry ran wild.”

“You have a twin brother as well?” Aziraphale asked.

“Nah, Harriet, but she hates that name.”

“Ah. Where are your parents now, surely they’re not here in the village? I would have met them by now.”

“Old man scampered off when we were teenagers, don’t know where he is and don’t care. Ma fucked off to Spain ten years back or so. Hasn’t been back since.” Crowley took a drink. “Harry’s been off America somewhere for five years now, no interest in coming back here.”

“My goodness!”

“Nah, not much good about them. Could have been worse though.”

“Don’t know who my dad is,” Hastur spoke up. “And me Mum, well, she was always trying to give me a proper dad, and that never worked out all that well for any of us. She’s not a bad sort, just bad with men.”

“Raised by my grandmother,” Ligur grunted. “Saint of a bloody woman, wouldn’t change a thing about her.”

“Aye, true.” Hastur agreed, squeezing his partner tighter.

“My parents kicked me out when I was 15 when I told them I wasn’t a girl or a boy.” Bea said simply. “I got by, the Village has some good people in it, couch surfed a bit. I can attest to Ligur’s Nan being a Saint,” they tipped their glass towards him. “Went to Uni and somehow managed to end up back here. Parents aren’t here anymore though, thank fuck. No time for that shit.”

“See Newt, Magpie? We all got shit.” Crowley smiled.

“Religious Zealots.” Aziraphale blurted out, then folded in on himself a bit.

“Drug addicts for me! There, we’ve all got our dirty little secrets out now in the open,” Newton quickly said. “Except you Anathema.”

Anathema looked startled for a minute. “Oh, um, nothing tragic. Opposite really, they’re very rich.” She shrugged her shoulders.

“That’s why she likes slumming it with us.” Crowley drawled.

“Yeah, Mr. Own’s My Own Business and has a Giant House.” Hastur grumbled. “You’re really struggling.”

“Hey now, I pay all you lot more than a living wage so shut it!” The conversation carried on as Crowley leaned in towards Aziraphale. “You ok Magpie?”

“Oh yes, um. Just wasn’t expecting childhood trauma as a conversation tonight.” He laughed shrilly and quickly took another gulp of his drink.

Crowley slipped his arm around Aziraphale and gave him a little squeeze. “Don’t need to say anything else about it, no worries.”

Aziraphale’s heart was pounding hard. “I wouldn’t mind telling you about it…someday.”

“And I’d love to listen anytime you want, anything you have to say.” Crowley started to take his arm back but heard Aziraphale make a small noise of complaint. Emboldened, he left it there.

“What’s up fuckers?” Dana walked up to the table with a drink in her hand and dragging a chair behind her.

There was a round of greetings and introductions. Dana plunked her drink down on the table between Crowley and Bea who’s cheeks were turning red. “Is someone going to move so I can get in here or what? Christ Crowley, take those douchey things off, it’s as dark as a dog’s arsehole in here.”

“Always a pleasure Dana.” Crowley smirked, removing his sunglasses with one hand, and putting them in his shirt pocket. He blinked a few times. The light was low enough that he wouldn’t get a headache if he left them off for a bit.

“Oh! It’s always lovely to see your eyes. And your little friend.” Aziraphale’s fingers skated over the snake tattoo on the side of Crowley’s face, a part of it always hidden by his glasses.

Crowley tried to think of something intelligent to say other than “Ngk” which was threatening to come out.

“Why did you arseholes put a koi pond in at Gabe’s house? I’ve spent more time there taking care of them then I am taking care of the town records.” Dana groused.

“Told you!” Crowley pointed to Anathema across the table. “Told you he’d muck it up.”

“Who’s Gabe?” Newton asked.

“Ugh, Gabe is our Himbo Mayer, you haven’t met him yet?” Dana complained. “He usually introduces himself to everyone, gives you that big empty smile.” Dana gave a big sharp toothed grin. “I’d like to say he’s harmless but he’s always mucking something up. He’s like…a big dumb golden retriever or something. All energy and no substance.”

“Lives in a disgustingly huge estate way on the other side of town. The Messengers have money, old and new. He went to school in the States, kept the accent? It’s weird.” Bea finished raised their empty glass towards the bar. Eric, Shadwell’s helper, waved back.

“His sister lives there with him, she’s the headmistress of the school.” Crowley added for the brothers.

“Oh yes, Ms. Messenger. She’s slightly terrifying.”

“Always was.” Bea added.

“Anyway, you two will meet him, he’ll shake your hand hard enough to break it and then hit on you good naturedly.”

“Oh, you have a gay mayor? That’s exciting!”

“Gabriel Messenger thinks he’s God’s Gift to everyone.” Ligur snorted. “Hit on anything.”

“He’s dumb as a rock and he can’t take care of fish for shit. I’ve had to take half of those poor koi home to my own ponds. Michael refuses to go anywhere near them as she didn’t want them in the first place, it’s a whole thing and I’m holding all of you responsible.” Dana slunk down in her seat.

“Hello everyone,” Eric showed up with a full try and passed new drinks around, somehow knowing what everyone was drinking.

“Good lad, cheers,” Hastur raised his half empty glass at him.

“Thanks baby brother,” Ligur smiled softly.

Eric smiled wide, managed to gather up the empties and was back behind the bar in a flash.

++++++

The night was passing so pleasantly that Aziraphale felt like he was in a dream. All of Crowley’s friends were kind, in their own way, to him and Newton. Anathema was getting increasingly closer to Newton all night, touching his arm or shoulder whenever she was speaking to him. Dana was leaned permanently towards Bea who was stammering unlike their usual sure speech. Crowley had kept his arm firmly around Aziraphale so they were plastered together. It felt amazing. Aziraphale closed his eyes and breathed in deeply, Crowley’s smokey wood scent filling his nostrils. Regretfully nature eventually called and Aziraphale had to untangle himself from Crowley and visit the loo. On his way back to the table he stopped at the bar and chatted to Shadwell and Eric.

“Hello there, can I buy you a drink?”

Aziraphale turned to see squat man leaning against the bars grinning at Aziraphale. His shirt was unbuttoned an obscene amount and he was clearly wearing a toupee. Aziraphale raised his eyebrows. The man had to be fifty! “Oh, no thank you,” he stammered. “I have one.”

“Ahh, come on, let me buy you a drink! Haven’t seen you in here before.”

“Leave the lad alone.” Shadwell barked at him. “He can pay for his own drink, don’t need the likes of you sniffing around.”

“None of your concern Mr. Shadwell, I’m talking to my new friend here.” The man grinned again, a flash of gold catching in the dim lighting.

“Thank you, it’s really kind of you, but as Mr. Shadwell said, I can buy my own drinks.” He raised his glass as if to show proof of this.

The man moved faster then Aziraphale would have expected and crowded Aziraphale up against the bar. “Come on, pretty little thing like you shouldn’t be let out all by yourself, done up like this. I wouldn’t let you leave my bed if I had my choice.”

“Get the fuck off him Sandy, now.”

“Fuck off Crowley,” the man, Sandy, pressed in tighter without breaking his eye contact with Aziraphale. “I’m busy.”

Crowley grabbed Sandy by the shoulder and ripped him away from Aziraphale, pushing himself in between the two. “I said leave him alone.” Crowley growled, fists balled at his side.

“What’s your problem? I saw him first.” Sandy spit.

“The hell you did! He’s mine!”

“No fighting in my pub! Sandy, you get your slimy arse out of here before I ban you! Go on now.” Shadwell barked.

“Ridiculous! I’ll take my money elsewhere!” Sandy threw up his arms then leered at Aziraphale. “You come find me when you’re ready for a real man.”

Aziraphale gave him a disgusted look as he exited the pub.

“Angel, Magpie, are you alright? Saw that bastard all over you.” Crowley was running his large hands up and down Aziraphale’s arms. “You alright? He didn’t hurt you did he? What did he say? Fuck, I should have come to the loo with you, but that would have been creepy though, right? Don’t want to be a creep but –“

Aziraphale reached for the lapels of Crowley’s shirt and dragged him down towards him and kissed him clumsily, sweetly.

Crowley’s eyes were wide. He slipped his arms around Aziraphale’s middle and pulled him close, deepening the kiss.

Aziraphale pulled back, eyes still closed and sighed.

“Oh fuck Angel, what do you want? From me? Anything Angel, I’ll give you anything.” Crowley groaned into the side of Aziraphale’s neck before nipping it.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale moaned.

“Hey, this is a respectable business, not a bordello! Take that sort of thing out of here.”

Aziraphale’s eyes shot open. “Oh, I’m so sorry Mr. Shadwell!”

Crowley kissed his upturned nose. “Come on, let’s go find a place to talk. We probably need to talk, right? Can think of a few things I’d like to do more but talking is good.”

Aziraphale followed him in a daze to a corner table. “You kissed me.”

Crowley grinned before pulling Aziraphale down beside him. “You kissed me actually. And it was bloody brilliant. You’re braver than me by a long shot.”

“You were so protective and the way you were standing so tall…you’re very, very tall.”

“Hmmm, you like that, huh?”

If possible Aziraphale blushed harder. “There are a lot of things I like about you. Have always liked about you but…”

“But?” Crowley frowned.

“It’s complicated, isn’t it? With the boys, and you paying me…”

“Yeeaahhh,” Crowley drawled. “But we don’t have to make it complicated. He reached for Aziraphale’s hands. “Look, what do you want out of this? I know you’re young, and I was there once, but I can’t do casual. Not with you, and not with the boys. If it went wrong…”

Aziraphale snorted. “Yes, we young ones are so much different than you wise ancient ones.”

Crowley chuckled. “Ok, you know what I mean though, I’m more than a decade older than you. I have two kids, I run a business. I can’t just, drop everything and be with you, even if I wanted to.”

“Crowley, you have to know, you have to know that I would never expect to come before your children, or your business. I just want what we already have, but more. Whatever you are willing to give me.”

“Fuck Angel, do you want the moon? I’ll go get it for you.”

Aziraphale laughed delightedly. “No darling, leave it up there, it looks so nice. You’ve called me that a couple times now: Angel.”

“Yeah….well.” Crowley motioned towards him. “What do you expect, it’s what you are, isn’t it? Just look at you? All silver and gold and sweetness. Came into my life, the boys lives, and made it so much better. God damned Angel is what you are.”

“Oh Crowley,” Aziraphale felt ridiculous tears springing to his eyes as he buried his face in Crowley’s neck.

“Silly Angel,” Crowley whispered into his curls, arms around him again. “Let me take you out, I can get Tracey to watch the boys or what about Monday? I’ll get the boys off to school and pick you up for lunch, or brunch. We’ll go to the nice Café.”

“That sounds wonderful Crowley.” He picked at a button on Crowley’s shirt. “Um, can I ask you something? Would you mind terribly if we took things…slowly? I wouldn’t want to rush things and I haven’t got much experience…I would just like to take things slow.”

“Says the bloke who snogged me in the middle of the pub on a Saturday night!” Crowley chuckled. “Yes, slow as you want Angel. We’ll go at your pace. Do you think it would be ok if we not say or do anything different in front of the boys for a bit? They’ve never seen me date someone, and you’re so damn special to all of us…”

“Of course! You don’t need to worry about that. Who was that terrible man anyway?”

“Ugh, Sandy Fann, Sandy bloody Fanny. He owns a few of the tourist traps and a bit of land around town, terrible landlord.”

“He was extremely distasteful. As if I’d ever.” Aziraphale sniffed. “I have standards.”

“And here I am, lowering them.” Crowley grinned as Aziraphale tutted and settled back into his arms.

“Should we join the others?”

“Hmmmm not yet. Enjoying this.” Crowley sighed, trailing fingers up and down Aziraphale’s back, making him shiver.

“Me too.”

The pub moved around them, their friends and family laughed at the table across the room, shooting them looks every now and then. Eric came around to see if they needed more drinks but Crowley and Aziraphale were happy wrapped together in their own little corner.

Chapter 10

Summary:

Aziraphale makes a purchase and has a little fun on a Sunday afternoon

Notes:

This is just silly smut, if smut isn't your thing than you can skip this chapter and you won't miss anything in the overall story. I decided to post this on it's own even though it's short because it didn't fit in with the "first date" chapter that would be coming next. Enjoy a little smut on a Friday!

The chimes on the door startled Aziraphale as he made his way into the dimly lit shop.

“Cor! I didn’t think I’d see you darkening my door!” Tracey trilled from behind the counter. “I’m guessing you’re not here for a bit of crystal or a reading are you Duck? Be wanting in my back room?”

“Um…” Aziraphale’s tongue felt heavy, his cheeks hot.

“Oh, come on in, come in! I was wondering if you’d ever darken my door!” Tracey came around the counter, bracelets jingling and skirts swirling.

“I don’t think I can do this,” Aziraphale stammered. “I should just order something online.”

“Phish! You don’t know what you’re getting when you order something online. Come on, have a look! Have a feel!” Tracey looped her arm through Aziraphale’s and pulled him along through the midnight blue curtains near the back of the store.

“Now back there,” She pointed to door to the right, “is where I do my readings and commune with the spirts who are willing. And over here,” pointing to the left, “is where the fun is! Tada!” She threw open a door to show a dimly lit but well-organized room filled to the brim with sex toys, lingerie and books. “Now, what exactly are we looking for today hmmmm?”

“I, um, I’m not sure.” Aziraphale mumbled, trying not to openly gape. Was that a chain over there hanging from the wall? What on earth?

“Now a little birdie told me that you and Mr. Crowley were all over each other at the pub last night! Finally! Why that brat didn’t call me and tell me himself, I’ll never know. I’ll give him a piece of my mind next time I see him! Are you looking for something to use with him?” She grinned, wriggling her eyebrows.

Aziraphale squeaked.

“To use without him then? Don’t be shy Dearie, I promise you I’ve heard it all and seen most of it.” She smiled and patted his hand.

“Ugh, this is humiliating!” Aziraphale tried to pull away to leave.

Tracey held him tightly. “That’s just society’s notions messing you up, sex is natural Duck! We should be free to have it and speak about it as much as we want. Now there’s no one here but you and I Love, and I won’t breath a word to anyone.”

Aziraphale took a slow deep breath. “Alright. I, well, that is…”

“Ah, I see. Virgin are you? My but that’s hard to believe, a looker like you!”

Aziraphale sighed in relief when Tracey understood his stammering. “I never really wanted to, you know, do anything until I met Crowley.”

Tracey smiled softly. “Well, isn’t that some kind of wonderful? So, you’re wanting to ease into things with him, is that what’s happening? Take things nice an slow but you’re gagging for it?”

“Tracey!”

She laughed and dragged him towards the display of colorful dildos. “Alright, well, I have lots to choose from. You wouldn’t believe the customers I get in a small village! Very adventurous lot our residents. A lot of this will be too advanced for you Dearie, don’t want you biting off more than you can chew, as they say. Hmmm. No to Alpha, no to Titanic. We’ll stay away from the inhuman looking ones hmm? Unless monster fucking tickles your fancy?” She held up a something that looked like a purple tentacle.

“I don’t know what that is.” Aziraphale choked out.

“Oh goodness, you really are a precious innocent, aren’t you? Lovely. Oh! Slim Jim.” She took the display model of a six-inch slim silicone dildo, dark blue in colour and handed it to Aziraphale. “Now Jim here is a healthy six inches, not too thick. He’s got some give to him, a suction base so you can stick him to the wall, the shower tile, the floor. Good little curve to him, very natural feeling. Yes, this is the one I’d recommend. You can work your way up to something bigger someday.” She motioned to the truly gigantic offerings on display.

“Alright. I mean, I’ll trust you.” Aziraphale thought he would have bought anything to get out of that room.

“Lovely!” She took the display model back and handed him a box. “There you are. Now, let’s go get you some lube.”

Aziraphale found himself back at the counter with Slim Jim and two bottles of lube in a brown paper bag. “I’ll just add these in, shall I?” Tracey held up a box of condoms before dropping them in. She added a layer of tissue paper before adding a piece of rose quartz and tiger’s eye crystals. “These will help you Ducky, I promise you that. Believe in the healing power of crystals!” She handed him his bag and his credit card. “Enjoy yourself!”

Mortified Aziraphale mumbled a goodbye and exited the shop with as much dignity as he had left.

Unlocking the door to the flat a few minutes later Aziraphale hurried into his bedroom feeling like a thief in the night. He knew Newton was out for a walk with Anathema and he’d have the flat to himself for at least another hour. He stood in the center of the room worrying his hands, feeling nervous and a bit shameful. “Oh, grow up!” he hissed at himself before dumping the bag out on his desk, crystals skittering about. A hot feeling coiled in the pit of his stomach when he saw the dildo. With trembling fingers Aziraphale unboxed it and stuck it to the desktop with its suction base. A nervous giggle slipped out of him as he watched it sway slightly on its flared base. It seemed so silly now that he had it here in his room, nothing to be ashamed of. Oh but Tracey had been right, he was truly gagging for something, some relief. His hand only did so much, and his own fingers could only reach so far.

Kissing Crowley last night had ignited something in him, the need for something more. He had given away his first kiss last night and being kissed back had given him a feeling that he was having trouble putting words to. His whole body had felt like it was lighting up from the inside, a thousand pin pricks of fire erupting at once. He wanted to keep going, to kiss Crowley for hours. Even just being held by him, not just an arm casually slung around him but holding him tight, feeling enveloped in the warmth of the other man…Aziraphale shivered. That had been as close to perfection as he had ever found himself.

Ten minutes later he was rubbing the bulbous head of Jim around his shiny and stretched out rim. “It’s never going to fit, how could it fit?” He mumbled before forcing himself to breath slower, will his body to relax. Almost by surprise he eased the dildo forward until its head was swallowed by his body. “Oh fuck!” he cried, arching his back, shivering. After raggedly breathing and letting his body adjust to this feeling, this feeling of stretch and fullness he had never achieved before he began to move. He slowly worked it in and out of himself, gaining ground until eventually the base was flat against his backside, his cock dripping and hard against his stomach. Would it be this way with Crowley he wondered, shivering. He laid there, not moving just feeling full and stimulated, experiencing it for the first time. It was strange and thrilling and he wished Crowley was leaning over him now, buried balls deep inside him. Thinking of Crowley, Aziraphale began to move again, whimpering. What kind of lover would Crowley be? He was so handsome, surely he had had many lovers in the past. Would he be gentle? Would he whisper sweet nothings in Aziraphale’s ear as he slowly made love to him? Or would he be rough with him? Hold him down on the bed, pushing his face into the pillows as he took him hard from behind? Aziraphale shifted in the bed a bit to get a better angle and cried out, arching his back. “There, there!” He cried to the empty room as he pounded Jim in and out, wrapping a lube slick hand around his hot aching cock. His vision whited out and his mouth was opened in a wordless scream as he trembled.

Eventually he realized that his eyes were screwed tightly shut and he eased them open, blinking slowly. His stomach was covered in his cum, Jim was shoved tightly in his still clenching arse. He reached for the towel beside him and clumsily wiped his hand and stomach before grimacing as he removed the dildo, wrapping it in the dirty towel and dropping it to the floor to be delt with later. He wiped his sensitive bottom with his discarded shirt after he struggled to his feet and back into his pants. He shoved the lube and the wrapped dildo under his bed and wobbled to his bedroom door unlocking it and opening it slightly, mortified to think that Newton may have come home to hear any of that. Thankfully there was no sign of Newton but there was a disgruntled looking Ash sitting at his door.

“Sorry baby,” Aziraphale mumbled as Ash strode past him and up onto the bed. Aziraphale followed him and sunk down under the blankets, an arm flung around Ash as he dozed off into an exhausted sleep.

Chapter 11

Summary:

Crowley takes Aziraphale out on their promised lunch date!
There's some smooching!
Newton and Aziraphale have an important discussion

Notes:

Hello everyone. I wanted to include a CW here at the top. There's a pretty short discussion about an eating disorder at the end of the chapter as well as some observations about food made by Crowley sprinkled here and there. If that is something that you can not possibly read about, I want you to know that it's not severe. Basically Aziraphale has a phobia about eating more than a small amount of food around newer people due to some childhood issues that he hasn't quite worked out yet. He will speak to Crowley about this in the next chapter and it's something that he will work on. I want to stress that he eats fine at home as well as around the twins because he has spent so many hours with the boys at this point. He is healthy. Again, if this is something that you just can't read about, I understand!
Take care of yourselves friends.

After a morning spent fielding questions of ‘Where’s Az?’ (‘He’s having a lie in. Yes, you will see him after school. Yes, he will pick you up. Yes, he will make you dinner. I don’t know if he’ll stay for a bedtime story, you will have to ask him nicely.’) he had gotten the twins off to school. Maybe not looking quite as smart as Aziraphale sends them off, perhaps their lunches not quite as perfectly packed (who has time to make cucumber slices into star shapes??) he headed into the shop, mostly to gloat around Bea.

“Gooood morning Bea!”

“What’s so good about it?” Bea gulped coffee from their spot behind the counter.

“Well, maybe your morning isn’t as great as mine, but mine is leading me to a fantastic lunch date with an Angel.” Crowley sauntered up to the counter and leaned on it.

“And?”

“And I win!”

“What did you win?”

Crowley threw his arms up in the air. “Our bet, I won. Didn’t you hear me say ‘date’? Did you not see Angel and I kiss at the Pub? I win.”

“Dana and I fucked Saturday night.” Bea put their mug down and crossed their arms, a smile forming on their face.

“You wot?” Crowley sputtered.

“Fucked.” Their smile grew wider. “And we spent all day yesterday together, like, you know, a date.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Crowley growled.

“We both knew I would win.” Bea picked up their mug again and took another deep drink.

“I don’t fucking believe it, I need proof.”

“You want proof of Dana and I fucking you perv?” They put their mug down again. “Wait, we took some pics yesterday,” They reached for their phone on the counter.

“Nope, nope, no never mind!” Crowley hurried away towards his office in the back. “You win!”

“That’s what I thought.”

 

He managed to hold out until 10:30 before texting Aziraphale.

C: angel….angel

A: Hello Darling! How are you this morning? How
were the boys?

C: nobody texts like that

A: Well, somebody must because I am doing
it right now. Did you just want to critique
my texting or did you want something?

C: …….

C: tryin to decide if i should play it
cool or not

A: Well, I know that you are very cool
so you don’t need to worry about that.

C: u r adorable

C: missed u today

A: I missed you too.

C: Can I come get you now? Is it too early?

A: Never too early! I’ll be ready in two ticks.

C: adorable c u soon

 

Crowley took the stairs to Aziraphale’s flat two at a time, grinning like a madman. He managed to arrange himself in a casual sprawl against the doorframe before knocking, trying to appear at least a little cool.

The door opened to a smiling Aziraphale. “Hello!”

“Hiya Angel.” Crowley rearranged himself to lean over the other man, swooping down for a quick sweet kiss, reveling in the fact that he could do that now. He pulled back and grinned wider.

“Oh!” Aziraphale looked a bit dazed, licking his lips afterwards. “Come in, come in, just have to get my phone and my keys.”

 

Crowley followed him into the flat, closing the door behind him, then reached for the other man. He pulled Aziraphale into his arms and squeezed him tight and kissed him again, open mouthed and filthy. Aziraphale went limp on his arms, his moans muffled. He moved down to Aziraphale’s neck where he placed a row of open mouth kisses along his jawline.

Aziraphale moaned again, trembling. “Crowley, Ah! Crowley, if you don’t stop that we won’t make it to lunch.”

“Would that be so terrible?”

“Crowley!”

Crowley snickered and placed one last lingering kiss on the Angel’s pulse point before moving away. “Sorry you’re just so delicious, can’t stop thinking about you. Yesterday was torture. I shouldn’t say that, me and the boys had a great day, but I wanted you to be there too. What did you get up to yesterday.”

Aziraphale eyes went wide. “Nothing! Nothing, why, what did you hear? What would I have gotten up to on a Sunday?”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “Just asking how you spent the day. I know we texted a bit in the evening but didn’t hear from you for most of the day. Which is fine!”

“Oh um, you know, just relaxed. Did a bit of a shop. Had an afternoon nap with Ash.”

“Sounds lovely. Where is the little flea bag?”

“Honestly. As if I’d let my cat have fleas! Ash is sleeping in my room. Are you ready to go?” Aziraphale scooped up his things from the coffee table and pocked them.

“After you Angel.” Crowley enjoyed the blush that dusted Aziraphale’s cheeks as he followed him out of the flat.

Fifteen minutes later they were seated at a corner table inside the café waiting for their food. Aziraphale sipped his water and smiled across the table.

Crowley bumped their knees together. “You must really love salad.”

“Hmm?”

“That’s all I’ve ever seen you order anytime we go out. Except at MacDonald’s, but you only had a few fries there.”

“Oh, yes, I was quite full that day.”

Crowley thought for a minute. “You only had half your salad at the pub for lunch the day we took the boys to MacDonald’s.”

“My, I didn’t know you were studying me quite so hard.” Aziraphale smiled sweetly. “Had I known, I would have made more interesting food choices.”

“Just saying. Doesn’t really fill you up, does it? Salad. Like what we feed Floppy.” He grimaced at the thought.

“Floppy needs to eat his grass and hay Crowley, you can’t be feeding him treats all the time.” Aziraphale scolded.

“Phhhh as if salad is a treat.” Crowley made a face.

“Were the boys difficult to get moving this morning?” Aziraphale fiddled with his napkin.

“Nah, just lot’s of ‘Where’s Az? Why isn’t Az here?’ questions.”

“Oh dear.”

“I think you’re on the hook for bedtime story duty tonight.”

Aziraphale placed the back of his hand on his forehead. “Oh no! Not that!”

“Yes, terrible. I know how much you hate it.” Crowley smiled fondly across the table.

“Here we are gents,” a smiling waitress arrived at their table. “For you, fish and chips and for you the kale and quinoa salad.” She placed the plates down on the table. “Anything else I can get you?”

“This is lovely, ta.” Aziraphale beamed at her.

”You want some of my chips?” Crowley offered up his plate.

“Oh no thank you.”

They chatted a bit about their weekends. Aziraphale was properly scandalized that Bea had spent the night with Dana. He cooed at the video of the boys running around the yard being chased by Floppy and Dog. Aziraphale shared his own pictures of Ash sprawled out on the bed.

“It seems like everyone is pairing up.” Aziraphale moved his kale around his bowl. “Did you know that Newton and Anathema went on a walk yesterday?”

Crowley pushed his nearly empty plate away and sat back in his chair. “I didn’t know that. Huh. Your brother, he’s a good sort, isn’t he?”

“Of course! Newton is, well, kindness personified.”

“Nah, that’s you Angel. He seems alright. Ana’s been through the wringer before though. Just wanna make sure she’s alright.”

“Oh, Newton is a sweetheart. It could just be friendly Crowley, people can just be friends you know.” Aziraphale pushed his bowl away and Crowley frowned at it. It was still mostly full. “They would make a lovely couple though, despite the age difference.”

“How old is your brother? Ana’s only just gone 30.”

“He’s 26, there’s four years between us.”

“Christ, I keep forgetting how young you are.”

“That’ll be your age addled mind.” Aziraphale was reaching for his wallet when Crowley stopped him.

“I don’t think so, I invited you, I pay.”

“You paid for all my drinks on Saturday!”

“Yup.”

“You’ve got to let me pay sometimes.”

“Nah,” Crowley grinned.

“Seriously Crowley.” Aziraphale pouted.

“Look,” Crowley took Aziraphale’s soft hand and let his thumb travel gently over his knuckles. “I like being able to pay your way, see you smile. Makes me feel good. I know that you can take care of yourself. I just like doing it. Will you let me?”

“You’re very strange, do you know that?”

“I’m just interesting.” He gave his hand a last squeeze before standing up and heading to the counter to pay.

There was still lots of time before the final bell rang so they had walked around the village for a bit then drove back towards Aziraphale’s flat. Crowley found a quiet spot to park so they could continue their date.

“Oh, our mother didn’t know what to do, there was flour everywhere!” Aziraphale laughed. “We had tried our best to clean it up, but you know what it’s like, it gets everywhere!”

Crowley reached over and fingered one of Aziraphale’s curls gently. “Was she cross?”

“No, I haven’t seen her ever truly cross. Well, at other people perhaps. She would get stopped by nosey people on the streets from time to time, people asking if we were her children.” Aziraphale frowned. “Two very white children with a Black woman is apparently still cause for alarm among some people.” He sniffed.

Crowley clucked his tongue and ran his fingers fully through the blood fluffy curls eliciting a sigh. “Just as soft as I imagined.” Crowley said softly.

“Feels lovely.”

“For me too. Come ‘er.” Crowley slid his hand down to the back of Aziraphale’s neck and gently pulled him closer capturing his lips.

Aziraphale clumsily kissed the older man back, internally worrying. Could Crowley tell this was all new to him? Was it too wet? Too dry? What exactly was one supposed to do with one’s tongue? He pulled back with a gasp. “Crowley, we’re in public!”

“We’re on a side street Magpie, no one is around. I’ll stop though.” He kissed him again softly. “You make me feel like a randy teenager, want to be kissing and touching you all the time.”

Aziraphale settled back in his seat. “I can’t imagine why.”

“Because you’re fucking gorgeous and sexy as hell?”

Aziraphale snorted. “Have you looked in the mirror my dear?”

Crowley grinned. “I guess we’ll just have to agree that we’re both smokin’ hot.”

Aziraphale rolled his eyes and smiled fondly. “Let’s table that discussion for a moment. If you’d like, I can stay after the boys are in bed. Perhaps we can continue the date on the sofa?”

“You little minx!”

Aziraphale gasped. “I am no such thing. Now I must say goodbye to you, you horrible man and go wait for the boys.” He leaned in for a quick kiss and wiggled away before a laughing Crowley could get ahold of him again. “I’ll see you tonight!” He shut the car door and walked towards his flat, wiggling a bit. Crowley wolf whistled as he sped by. “Menace!” Aziraphale called after him with a happy grin.

 

“Dad’s home!”

Crowley was greeted by his boys and a yipping Dog at the front door as he kicked his boots off.

“Az is going to stay for story time!” Adam hopped up and down.

“Az made shepherd’s pie!” Lock added.

Crowley swept them both up in his arms and gave them kisses. “Sounds delicious, smells good too!” He made his way into the dining room putting the twins down so they could sit in their seats with their steaming plates.

“You’re home early! Sit.” Aziraphale slid the plate in front of him to Crowley’s spot before getting up.

“I’ll go dish up my own Angel, no need to fuss.”

“Oh, do sit down, I’ll get another plate, it’s no bother.”

Crowley followed Aziraphale into the kitchen and as soon as they were out of sight he swooped in for a quick kiss. “Hi.”

Aziraphale smiled. “Hi.” He put his forehead on Crowley’s chest for a moment and breathed deep before pushing off. “Get yourself a cup while you’re in here.”

Crowley went to the cupboard to get himself a cup and watched Aziraphale dish out a small amount of shepherd’s pie for himself, no bigger than what the boys were eating. “That’s not all you’re having. The plate you gave me is full.”

“I can always dish out more if I’m hungry. We had a lovely plate of cheese and crackers for snack probably a bit too close to dinner time.” Aziraphale breezed by and headed back to the dining table where the boys were happily eating while Dog trolled around under the table for dropped morsels.

 

“Finally. How many stories did you have to read?”

Aziraphale dropped down on the sofa next to Crowley who slipped an arm around his shoulders. “I don’t even know. Too many.”

Crowley slid his hands up and down Aziraphale’s side. “My poor Magpie. Should I just put Bake Off on? We can cuddle up?”

“Oh, that sounds lovely actually.” Aziraphale arranged himself closer to Crowley snuggling into his chest and sighing.

“Do you want any wine or nibbles?”

“Ha, you said nibbles!” Aziraphale giggled.

“Guess you’re rubbing off on me.” Crowley leered.

“You are horrible!”

“Do you want anything or not?”

“I’m fine, I just want to lay here for a bit with you, if that’s alright?”

“Course.” Crowley kissed the top of his fluffy head and absently mindedly trailed his fingers back and forth over Aziraphale’s side.

One episode became two. Crowley tried to offer food to Aziraphale again and was put off. “I should actually be going home soon.” Aziraphale sat up and stretched.

“I suppose I can let you go.”

“I’ll be back before you know it.” He headed towards the front door where his shoes and backpack waited for him.

“Can I give you a proper kiss goodbye?”

“Of course darling.”

Crowley pulled Aziraphale into his arms and cupped his jaw, tilting him just so before kissing him slowly, savoring him. He could feel Aziraphale trembling and he felt a hot flush go through his whole body, pooling in his stomach. He slowed the kiss and moved, resting their foreheads together. “It’s more amazing every time we do that.”

Aziraphale let out a nervous giggle. “Practice makes perfect I suppose! I’ll see you in the morning dear one.”

“Good night, drive safe. Text me when you get home.” Crowley opened the door for him.

“Honestly, it’s less than a five minute journey!”

“I know, I’m a Dad though, I worry.”

“I’ll text you, in about six minutes. Good night!”

Crowley waved as Aziraphale walked towards the door and watched as he got into the shiny blue car driving away.

 

“Newton, I’m starving!” Aziraphale flung his bag on the floor, nearly tripping over Ash as he tried to get into the kitchen as quickly as possible.

“Ordered you a curry. Oh, got extra garlic naan too.” Newton pushed a takeout container towards Aziraphale who descended on it like man starving.

“Thank you! I wasn’t expecting Crowley to be home for dinner after spending so much time this afternoon with me.” With his free hand he sent a text to Crowley letting him know that he was home safely. He ate several more bites quickly before slowing down and taking a drink of the water that Newton had poured for him.

Newton had his arms crossed. “You need to tell him.”

“I just need to spend more time around him during mealtimes and it will be fine! I was able to eat a bit of the shepherd’s pie tonight.”

“I think we should revisit the idea of counselling while we’re at it too.”

“Newton it’s fine, I’ll be fine, once I’m more comfortable I’ll be able to eat just fine around him.”

“You’ve shared plenty of meals with him, you’re dating him for crying out loud.” Newton crossed his arms. “I’m sure he’s noticed.”

Aziraphale tore into the garlic naan. “He mentioned something today. I’ll talk to him when we’re alone. I just, it’s weird, you know?”

“I know, but it’s not. You just have issues eating around people because of your messed up childhood. Which counselling would probably help with by the way.”

“If I say that I’ll consider it will you drop it for tonight? Please?”

“Yes, of course. I just worry about you.”

“I know, it’s fine, really. I eat fine here at home, and I’m comfortable around the boys now, I can eat around them. I’ll just work my way up to Crowley. I’m certain you’re right, if I speak to him…I know he won’t make a thing out of it but part of me worries…”

“He’s not going to end things with you because you have a phobia about eating too much food around new people Az.”

“I know, I know that! Logically. But there’s a part of me that worries. Weird food thing, no experience with sex or relationships, crappy childhood…I worry that he’ll take a look at the whole picture and he won’t like what he sees.”

“Impossible. And even if he did, fuck him!”

“You’re very free with that word lately.” Aziraphale smiled.

“I’m very aware of not being able to say it during the day now so it wants to come out when I’m not at the school. Get used to it.” He leaned down and picked up a purring Ash and gave him a cuddle. “You’ll talk to Crowley?”

“Yes, I promise. As soon as we’re alone for more than five minutes again.”

“Good. Now come find something truly awful for us to watch on the telly. Maybe oversized animals running amok?”

Aziraphale gathered up his meal and followed Newton and Ash into the living room before going back for his phone. There was a message from Crowley telling him how much he missed him. He texted back, agreeing and his chest felt less tight. How could he think that Crowley, the sweet man that he was, would react badly to him sharing something important about himself? He would speak to him as soon as he could.

“Come on! I found something called Eight Legged Freaks and I’m extremely excited!”

Aziraphale rolled his eyes. “I’m coming, try to contain your excitement if you can.”

Chapter 12

Summary:

Aziraphale has a heart to heart with Crowley and they come to an understanding.

Also a taste of smut.

Notes:

Hello everyone. As promised, this chapter has Aziraphale explaining his eating disorder to Crowley, so there is of course a CW for eating disorders for this chapter. There are also vague mentions of child abuse but no details are gone into. This chapter will be the most that Aziraphale's eating disorder will be explored, other chapters will have mentions of it, but nothing as in-depth as this one.
Stay safe and take care of yourselves and thanks for reading

Tuesday proved too busy to sit down for the conversation as Aziraphale had planned. He had barely seen Crowley at all that day as there had been a last-minute wedding order Crowley had agreed to provide flowers for (“Angel, who the fuck gets married on a Wednesday?”). Tracey had ended up coming to stay with the boys that evening as it was all hands on deck at the shop and Crowley wasn’t sure how late he’d be working. After a difficult chat with Tracey (‘Yes, Jim and I have become quite well acquainted, thank you for asking!”) he had made his way back to the village.

The next night Crowley didn’t get home until well after the boys were asleep. He gulped down the food Aziraphale placed in front of him and argued when Aziraphale sent him off to bed andwas asleep within minutes.

Wednesday. He was determined that they would have the conversation today. He was had been jittery since Monday and couldn’t put it off any longer for his own sanity.

A: How are you today dear? We didn’t have a chance to chat
before you went into work this morning.

C: angel! was thinking of you

C: shops a disaster everyone is
cranky as fuck

C: remind me to never do last
minute weddings

C: especially not Wednesday weddings

C: fuck

C: how are you boys get off ok

A: That sounds stressful! I could drop
by and help if you’d like, it’s no bother.
The boys were good as gold, as usual.
I miss you.

C: aw miss you too

C: could stop by now for a visit
if you want.

C: i mean i’ll drop by your flat

C: if you want

A: Please!

 

Aziraphale anxiously tidied the already tidy flat while he waited for Crowley’s visit. A knock on the door made him startle and he forced himself to be calm. “It’s open!” he called out.

Crowley pushed open the door with a smile. “Hiya Angel.”

“Crowley,” Aziraphale sighed. They moved towards each other and were soon embracing.

“Missed you Angel. Bloody weddings! It’s not even bloody wedding season. A Wednesday, can you believe it? Fuck me. Got the guys helping in the shop today, Bea will have it whipped back into shape soon but Christ what a mess!” He squeezed the blond tight. He made to let go but Aziraphale held him tighter. “Something wrong Angel?”

Aziraphale took a deep breath in and slowly let it out again. “There’s something I need to talk to you about Crowley.”

Crowley stiffened. “Alright.”

“And it’s going to be…difficult for me to talk about so I just need you to listen.”

Crowley felt panic welling up. “Alright.”

“Come, sit.” Aziraphale detangled himself from Crowley and led him to the sofa. He wrung his hands while he struggled to find a way to start the conversation. “Crowley, on Monday you mentioned, that is, you noticed,” Aziraphale groaned.

“Angel, you’re freaking me out here.” Crowley had started bouncing one of his long legs.

“Oh, there’s nothing for you to be nervous about, I promise!” Aziraphale reached for one of Crowley’s hands and squeezed them tightly. He kept them in his lap where he could fiddle with the long fingers while he gathered his courage. He began again. “You noticed that I didn’t eat much in front of you. Well, that’s a problem I have. I have a problem eating around new people, or strangers, or anyone, really, until I spend a lot of time with them, until I know them and feel, I don’t know? Safe perhaps? I think it’s taking me longer to eat around you because, well, the feelings that developed between us. That’s new to me.”

“Oh Angel, you should have said, I wouldn’t have commented on it if I had known.” Crowley looked pained.

Aziraphale shook his head. “No, no you didn’t do anything wrong. I should have mentioned…I don’t want there to be secrets between us Crowley and this, this thing is a part of my life.” He paused and squeezed the long fingers he still had in his grasp. “I don’t remember my biological family, not really. Shades of a memory here and there. I know mostly what my mother Mary told me. She answered every question we ever asked her, you know? I know they were religious. Part of some group. Food was scarce, money was too. I remember being hungry, that’s the main thing I remember. I remember some other more…unpleasant things. It was a ‘spare the rod and spoil the child’ sort of group. I was so little and quiet back then I think I escaped the worst of it. When I was taken out of their care, I was put in a hospital for a time, to ‘fatten’ me up, as the nurses said. They were lovely, I have good memories of them. It took me a while to eat everything that was offered to me, because gluttony is a sin, don’t you know?” He laughed bitterly. “Regardless, I was a healthy weight before long and I was put into the care system. The first family I had was, well, let’s just say that there are a lot, a lot of good people out there who want to do good and to help children, give them a family and a safe home. Then there are those who do it to collect money. This was a huge family, they had three or four children of their own then at least as many fosters. I was eating with relish then, anything I ate I was excited about!”

Aziraphale paused and looked up at Crowley who was sitting stiffly, his jaw clenched. “They started calling me a little piggy. Not in a nice way. I was eating ‘too’ much, whatever that means. They just wanted to stretch their food budget I suppose, I don’t know that they did it to be cruel but I suppose it felt a bit like whiplash. I had been denied, then told to indulge and denied again. I began eating slower, more carefully and was still put down for it. I left there not long after that, I had lost a bit of weight and my case worker was concerned.”

Aziraphale stood up and began to pace around the room, Crowley’s eyes following him, staying silent.

“It all sort of went downhill from there. I wasn’t placed in any truly horrific homes. I wasn’t, wasn’t touched or abused. Some were kind. Some were indifferent. I suppose I closed in on myself a bit, turned inwards. Not uncommon. It got to the point where I couldn’t eat at the table while those, those strangers were staring at me, the new child in their home, like I was part of some sort of exhibit, judging my every movement, my every sound.” He shuddered. “I could eat fine on my own, in my room or in the kitchen when I was alone. I would get in trouble for stealing food but it was only the food I should have eaten at meal times. I had a lovely older couple who let me eat in my bedroom, they were kind. I ate school lunches locked in a bathroom stall or tucked away in an empty classroom.”

“Angel,” Crowley’s voice sounded tight.

“Mary’s house was different. I was still very thin when I showed up there. She’s a social worker and a good one. Took Newton and I to counselling appointments, made us feel safe and loved and cared for.” He sat back down on the couch. Crowley reached for him and pulled him into his arms, squeezing him tight, his bony chin resting in a nest of curls.

“When I was able to voice it, explain the problem I had she built a wall out of books on the kitchen table! She and Newton and on one side and I sat on the other during mealtimes. That way we were still together but they couldn’t see me. It took a while, I was worried about the sounds I made, or eating too much too quickly but Mary would just talk and talk. After a few weeks she would take a book away until eventually it was just the three of us, sharing a meal together. A family.”

Crowley tightened his arms around Aziraphale. “What can I do Angel? I mean, obviously I’m going to hunt down your bio parents and foster parents and murder them all, but other than that, what can I do for you?”

Aziraphale snorted. “As appealing as it is for you to become a serial killer to right the wrongs of my past, let’s not be too hasty.”

“I can come home later perhaps. After you and the boys are finished eating?”

“Oh darling, you can’t skip meals with your boys. Perhaps I can try to eat a bit with the three of you and then you can chase the boys off and I can finish my meal on my own? I know that in time, I’ll be able to eat more around you. I eat around the boys all the time now.”

“Anything, and I mean anything Angel.”

“It’s rather silly, isn’t it?”

“What? No not silly at all. It’s a part of you, and if you want my help, I’ll help you. Seriously, murder is still very much on the table.”

“Crowley!”

Crowley grinned wickedly. “All you have to do is ask.”

“You’re awful.”

“And you love it. I wonder what else I can do to help though, seriously. I wonder if, in time, you’ll let me feed you. A sweet strawberry or a truffle?”

“Oh!” Aziraphale’s cheeks darkened.

“Would love to be the one to put food in that pretty mouth of yours. Maybe we can work up to it? One small bite at a time? No rush. Nice and slow.” Crowley’s own eyes were dark, his sunglasses pushed up in his hair.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale gasped, turning in his grip to crash their mouths together.

Crowley pulled Aziraphale into his lap, his large hands gripping Aziraphale’s arse tightly. Aziraphale’s hands were in Crowley’s hair, tugging at the short red strands as their mouths and tongues moved together. He jerked his hips upwards tearing a moan from Aziraphale when their erections brushed together. “Fuck Angel, feel so good. You wanna stop? We can stop if you’re feeling-“

“No!” Aziraphale dove down to capture Crowley’s mouth again, grinding himself downward so their erections met.

Crowley broke free from the kiss so Aziraphale attacked his neck. “Angel, you just, ah! You just unloaded some heavy stuff there and oh fuck! Yes! Killing me Angel.” Crowley’s head fell back, eyes closed.

Aziraphale kissed up Crowley’s jawline. “Crowley, thank you for caring so much that you’d willingly cut short this snog session, but I actually feel great.”

Crowley squeezed his arse tightly. “You sure do.”

Aziraphale giggled. “Awful! What I was trying to say is, I feel good about it, honestly! It’s not weighing on me anymore, I feel so…light. You didn’t run.”

“Would never Angel, would never run from you.”

“Oh, Dearest.”

They stared at each other sharing besotted looks before Crowley rolled his hips again. “We both have a bit of a situation here.”

Aziraphale closed his eyes. “Mmm we do.”

“What should we do about it?” Crowley ghosted his hand over the bulge in the front of Aziraphale’s trousers.

Aziraphale’s hips seem to have a mind of their own as they stuttered up towards the hovering hand. “Crowley,” he whined, his entire body shuddering.

“Tell me what you need Magpie.”

“I don’t know!”

“Shhhh it’s alright, shhh.” Crowley covered Aziraphale’s face with gentle kisses. “We don’t have to anything more than this Aziraphale.”

“Can we, that is, can we, like this? With our clothes on?” He was blushing furiously.

“Yes, yes Angel.” Crowley palmed the bulge again, pulling a cry from Aziraphale. He hid his face in Crowley’s neck, hips rabbiting.

“Fuck Angel, yes, you feel so good like this, so fucking good in my hand. Do you feel good? Want to make you feel amazing.”

“Ah! I can’t, I can’t!” Aziraphale cried taking fist fulls of Crowley’s shirt and huffing into his neck.

“You can, fall apart for me Magpie, let me see it, let me see it.” He moved his hand faster.

“Crowley!” Aziraphale stiffened then trembled and fell forward into Crowley’s arms gasping.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck!” Crowley held Aziraphale tight as he frantically rubbed himself against the other man’s thigh before he froze and groaned loudly.

After his breathing had slowed Aziraphale realized he had all but collapsed in Crowley’s arms. “I’m not too heavy am I?”

“Nope, feels great, you in my arms. Feels like I could fly right now.”

“It was all over rather quickly, wasn’t it?” Aziraphale giggled.

“Yeah, not a stellar performance on either of our parts, but the finish was fan-fucking-tastic.”

Aziraphale shifted and grimaced at the cooling wetness in his pants. “I now see one of the many drawbacks to doing this with our clothes on.”

Crowley laughed. “All part of the fun. Though I will take advantage of your loo and clean myself up. Want to look at least halfway presentable when I leave here.”

“Can we cuddle for just a few more minutes?”

“As long as you want Angel.”

Chapter 13

Summary:

Crowley and Aziraphale supervise a sleepover and are adorably domestic.

“Remind me why I agreed to this again?” It was Saturday night and Crowley was watching Adam, Lock and Pepper run around the back garden, dog nipping at their heels as they screamed about dragons and knights.

“You agreed to this to help out a fellow family and to have a free Saturday night here and there.” Aziraphale replied, Floppy half asleep in his arms as he was gently stroked. The two men watched the kids run off their energy after their dinner of pizza and juice boxes followed by ice cream sundaes which may have been a terrible idea. Crowley had chased the kids out of the dining room as soon as they were finished eating, roaring that he was a dragon about to eat them for stealing his treasure. They had all screamed in delight as they scrambled to get away. Crowley had winked at Aziraphale who’s own slice of pizza had been nibbled on during dinner. Once alone he had finished it, along with another piece and a spoon full of ice cream that he snuck while putting everything away. When he had joined everyone outside Crowley was loosely tied to a lawn chair with a skipping rope and Floppy was in serious danger of being trampled at any given moment as he calmly hopped about, nibbling grass happily.

“Ah, the free Saturday night, that’s right. Worth it then.” He smiled softly at Aziraphale.

“When you look at me like that it’s very difficult not to kiss you.” Aziraphale pouted.

“Now you know how I feel every time I look at you.”

“Oh you romantic!” Aziraphale made a face before he hid it in Floppy’s soft fur.

“Did you get your fill of dinner?” Crowley looked straight ahead, tone causal.

Aziraphale smiled. “Yes darling, I – Adam, don’t you dare hit your brother with that sword! I’m watching you!”

“I wasn’t gonna!”

“Adam!” Crowley warned.

“I wasn’t!”

“Why do they even have wooden swords?” Aziraphale fretted.

“They’ll be fine.”

“Ahh! Adam hit me!” Lock screeched.

“Oh dear.”

“Adam James Crowley!” Crowley was on his feet trying to untangle the skipping rope around his legs.

“I didn’t mean to Dad, I didn’t!”

“Adam hit my hand and it hurts!”

“Come here my darling, let’s have a look.”

“Why do men always have to turn everything violent?” Pepper huffed.

Aziraphale gently put Floppy down in the grass before gathering a distressed Lock up in his arms. “Let’s see, let’s see. Oh dear, I see a bit of a red mark here on your hand. That calls for an ice pack, don’t you think?”

Lock sniffed and nodded his head.

“Alright my darling, you’re being very brave about the whole thing! Let’s go get an ice pack. Come back up Floppy.” Aziraphale reached down and scooped up Floppy with his free hand and handed him to Lock, then stood up, carrying them both into the house. “Come on Pepper, you come in now while Crowley speaks to Adam.”

“I don’t have to go home now, do I?”

“Of course not Pepper, this is just a little bump.” He sat Lock down on the counter before opening the freezer and digging for one of the small ice packs.

“Good, because my Moms are probably kissing right now and I don’t want to be there for that.”

“Yuck.” Lock grimaced.

“I know, it’s awful.” Pepper made a face. “They’re always kissing.”

“It’s lovely when parents love each other so well that they like to hug and kiss.” Aziraphale placed the ice pack on Lock’s hand and gave Floppy a scratch.

“It’s gross. Grownups are so weird.” Pepper crossed her arms.

Crowley and Adam came into the kitchen, Dog trotting ahead. “Go on Adam, what do you have to say?”

Adam looked down at his feet. “I’m sorry that I hit you even though I didn’t mean to hit you.”

Crowley rolled his eyes. “Let’s have a look at your war wound solder. Wow, you must be tough, no tears or anything.” He grinned at his son and ruffled his hair.

“Why don’t we put on a movie and have some popcorn?” Aziraphale suggested. “Start to settle a bit before bedtime.”

Half an hour later Crowley was sprawled on the sofa with Aziraphale sitting beside him, just close enough that he could trace mindless shapes on the back of his neck, smiling when he felt the man shiver. The kids were sitting on the floor too close to the television, watching a Disney movie and tossing pieces of popcorn in the air for Dog to snap up. Aziraphale took a picture and sent it to Rose letting her know that Pepper was having a great time and they would try to wrangle them into bed at a half respectable time.

“Come closer Magpie,” Crowley murmured.

“I don’t think that would be a very good idea.”

“I think it would be an excellent idea.”

“You are an actual demon you know that, right?”

Crowley grinned. “Isn’t it time for you lot to get off to bed already?”

“Aw Dad, the movie’s not done yet!”

“We stayed up later than this when we had the sleepover at my house.”

“Few more minutes than.”

Lock climbed to his feet and clambered onto the sofa between the adults, leaning against Crowley and putting his feet in Aziraphale’s lap.

“Getting tired little man?” Crowley asked quietly, sweeping Lock’s hair from his forehead gently.

“No!”

The adults shared a look and smiled.

“What was I thinking?” Crowley kept gently playing with Lock’s hair while the boy cuddled into him more, his eyes closing.

Half an hour later Crowley and Aziraphale were tiptoeing out of the boys room, leaving the door open just a bit. Crowley had carried a sleeping Lock upstairs earlier, brushing his teeth and putting his pajamas on for him while the boy sleepily protested. Once he was in bed with his stuffed Floppy under his arm and his real Floppy in his cage, he was snoring quietly in minutes. Meanwhile Aziraphale had lead a protesting Adam up the stairs while carrying Pepper, Dog yawning and running ahead where he jumped onto Adam’s bed and settled down. After some cajoling both children had their teeth brushed and were in their own pajamas. Pepper was settled in the air mattress on the floor between the twin’s beds, both children following Lock into sleep quickly.

“Running around beating themselves silly with wooden swords seems to be the trick to an early bedtime.”

“Poor Lock will have a bruise tomorrow.” Aziraphale frowned.

“He’ll be fine, kids always have bumps and bruises. Adam will be more careful next time.” They made their way downstairs towards the living room again. Before Aziraphale could bend to start cleaning up the spilled popcorn on the floor Crowley slipped an arm around his waist and pulled him close, leaning down for a deep kiss.

Aziraphale’s eyes fluttered closed and he sighed, all but melting into Crowley’s arms.

Crowley slowed the kiss then broke it, putting their foreheads together. “Been killing me all day, seeing you and not being able to touch you.”

“I know, but we agreed.” Aziraphale slipped his hands around Crowley’s trim waist.

Crowley’s hands traveled downwards as they slid over Aziraphale’s behind, causing the other man to gasp and blush. “We did, and it’s the right thing to do, for the boys. Just hard on me, seeing you look so fucking sexy all day and not being able to do anything about it.”

Aziraphale snorted. “Sexy? I’m wearing a pair of corduroy trousers and a jumper.”

“Exactly. Sexy. You should wear your glasses sometime.”

“My glasses? Goodness, those old things?”

“Got me going that day, in the car. Could barely keep my hands off myself when I got home.”

“Crowley!”

“Nearly knocked myself out in the shower that night, came so hard I almost lost my footing.”

“Goodness!” Aziraphale was blushing furiously.

“You drive me Crazy Magpie. Haven’t wanked this much since I was about 15.”

“Crowley! You can’t say such things!”

“I’ll stop if it bothers you.”

“I didn’t say that.”

Crowley grinned. “I think you like it, hearing how hot and bothered I get around you.”

“Well, it’s…flattering, I suppose.”

It was Crowley’s turn to snort. “Come on, let’s sit down. Are you hungry? Not to be a bother.”

“I’m alright, thank you.”

“You sure? I can’t get you anything?”

“Well, I suppose I am a bit thirsty. I’ll just go get my water bottle from the kitchen.”

“Sit! I’ll get it!”

“Crowley, you don’t need to wait on me.”

“Sit.” Crowley’s voice was stern.

Aziraphale’s eyes went wide. “Yes Sir.” He sat primly on the couch.

“Sir, I like that.” Crowley strutted away and returned with his Yeti, the sound of ice cubes ringing.

They cuddled on the couch for a bit, chatting. Aziraphale snuggled up to Crowley’s side and Crowley’s arm possessively around him.

“We best go to bed Darling, I’m sure the children will be up early.”

“Can’t believe you are spending the night in my house and not in my bed.” Crowley grumbled.

“Honestly! We’re not there yet, are we? In our relationship?”

“Yeah, I guess we should talk about the logistics, shouldn’t we?”

“Logistics?”

“Yeah, when’s the last time you were tested?”

“Tested?”

“Is there an echo in the room?”

“Sorry,” Aziraphale worried his hands.

“Been a while for me. Got tested after my last hookup but that was a few years now. If you haven’t been tested in a while we can go together.”

“Oh. That ‘tested’.” Aziraphale blushed furiously. “Can’t seem to recall the last time I was tested.”

“When’s the last time you’ve had a partner? Not that I want to know the details, the thought of someone else touching you…” Crowley made a face.

“Oh, um, there’s been no one of any consequence for a long time.” Aziraphale was looking anywhere but at Crowley.

“I’ll make us a couple of appointments for a blood draw than? Just so we know? Not that I’m in a hurry to get you into bed or anything. Not that I don’t want to either!”

“You are very cute when you get flustered.”

“I’m not cute! I’m ruggedly handsome.” Crowley scowled.

“Of course dear.”

Aziraphale squealed as Crowley tackled him, tickling and kissing him senseless.

 

 

Sunday afternoon Aziraphale was at the grocery store doing his shopping while Newton was an aisle away. It had been a smooth morning, the kids had sort of slept in and Rose and Urial had picked Pepper up just before lunch time. Rose had teased the men about Aziraphale spending the night horribly, causing Crowley to sputter and Aziraphale blush brightly.

It had been so difficult to untangle from each other and go to bed in separate rooms the night before. Crowley had kissed him within an inch of his life against the guest room’s door before sauntering down the hallway to his own bedroom leaving Aziraphale gasping and desperate. He wished he had told him earlier that he didn’t actually need a blood draw, that he had never been with another person in his life but he hadn’t been able to tell him. It was so silly, he knew Crowley wouldn’t make fun of him or treat him differently, he had proven that already, but he just felt embarrassed about the whole thing.

“Hello beautiful.”

Aziraphale felt a hot breath on his neck and spun around quickly, nearly dropping his shopping basket.

Sandy Fann was inches away from him, grinning widely, his gold tooth catching the overhead lights.

Aziraphale stepped back. “Mr. Fann.”

“So formal, you can call me Sandy.”

“I don’t think so Mr. Fann. Is there something that you wanted?”

Sandy’s wide grin faltered. “I had hoped that we could get to know one another better.”

“I don’t think so, Mr. Fann. It appears that you are looking for more than friendship. I am with Crowley.”

“Seems a bit sketchy, doesn’t it? The boss fucking the nanny?”

Aziraphale went pale. “I don’t think that what my partner and I do or don’t do is anyone’s business.”

“Partners are you?” Sandy’s smile looked slimy somehow. “Is that what they call it these days? Old enough to be your Dad isn’t he?”

“If Crowley is old enough to be my father than you are certainly old enough to be my grandfather. Good day.” Aziraphale turned on his heel and marched down the rest of the aisle in search of Newton.

Later in the car he was still fuming. “How dare he? I clearly had no interest in him at the pub that night and now he’s accosting me while I’m doing my shopping?”

“He’s gross.” Newton agreed as he drove them back to the flat. “He gives me creep vibes for sure. It sucks that he’s our landlord.”

“He is?” Aziraphale nearly shrieked.

“Yeah, you were finishing up school when I came down and did the walkthrough. He was fine to deal with, just kind of…ick.”

“That man has a key to our flat. Horrifying.”

“I’ll play Devi’s advocate here for a moment if you don’t mind.” Newton had parked his car and they began the task of carrying their bags up the stairs. “You and Crowley aren’t exactly public.”

Aziraphale watched Newton struggle with his bags and the flat keys, narrowly avoiding dropping everything in the process before he successfully unlocked the door and pushed it open. Ash came running and rubbed up against both men, darting in and out of their legs as they struggled to close the door, not drop their heavy bags, or crush the cat.

“Out of the way you silly thing!” Aziraphale said fondly. He made it to the kitchen with his bags and put them on the counter before bending to pick up Ash who started loudly purring immediately. “To your point, we’re not NOT telling anyone. We just don’t want to let on around the boys incase things don’t work out. They’re so young and Crowley’s never brought anyone home to them before.”

“Are you concerned it’s not going to work out?” Newton began unpacking the bags and sorting things.

“Well, I mean, general anxiety and all that.” He shrugged before letting Ash climb up on his shoulder. He started putting away things as Newton unpacked. “I think it’s going well.”

“Have you two…yet?”

“Newton. My brother. Are you asking me, your younger brother, if I have had sex with my boyfriend yet?”

“Ugh, no, forget I asked.” He held up two bags of oranges. “How did we both buy oranges. We had a list didn’t we?”

“Oranges were on my list.”

“They were on mine too.” Newton shrugged.

“We’re going to go get blood tests together.” Aziraphale refused to meet Newton’s eyes.

“Aziraphale, you’ve never had sex.”

“I know that!”

“So, do you need to be tested for STI’s?”

“Probably not.” He pouted.

“Probably?”

“What’s happening with you and Anathema?”

“Very smooth subject change.” Newton stopped unpacking groceries. “I’m not really sure. We’ve hung out a few times, but I don’t know, getting mixed signals from her. Sometimes she’s really touchy feely and other times she keeps me at arm’s length.” He shrugged. “I’m enjoying her company but I’m not going to push a relationship on her. I’m happy with being her friend. I’d be happy to see if we could be more. She’s beautiful and smart and funny and weird, in a good way. I don’t know, do you think it’s the age thing? She’s only a few years older than me.”

“Anathema doesn’t seem to be the type of person to let a few years stand in the way. Crowley mentioned that she’d been through a lot, so maybe she’s just being cautious?”

“Yeah, I get that vibe. I’ll just go at her pace and see where she leads us.”

“How are you so calm?”

“Well, I’m not dying of horniness like you are.”

“I beg your pardon!”

Newton laughed before going back to the groceries. “Tell me I’m not wrong?”

“You’re a menace, you know that?”

“A menace who’s right.”

“Menace.” Aziraphale muttered as he began loading packages and cans into the cupboards.

Notes:

Guys. Guys. Over 3400 of you have hit on this story and I am blown away. I can not thank everyone enough. Thank you to everyone who has read and hopefully enjoyed this story and thank you to everyone who gives me such lovely comments. They really do mean the world to me. Stay safe everyone.

Chapter 14

Summary:

Crowley and Az go to their appointments for their blood tests
Aziraphale has another run in with Sandy

Notes:

There's a bit of angst in this chapter but not between our boys.

There's mention of possible stalking behavour, nothing in great detail but if that's something that would trigger or upset you, please skip this chapter. Sandy will not be featured in much more of the story so you can take heart in that!

Again, thank you for reading, thank you for your kind comments, they brighten my day so much. I appreciate each and every one.

Take care of yourselves.

Aziraphale was waiting at the Café for the lunch order Crowley had called in for his staff while happily texting the man. It was Thursday and Crowley always treated his staff to lunch that day, as a long-standing tradition. Lately Aziraphale had been picking up the lunch order and dropping it off. He would often stay and visit with the staff, sometimes until it was time for him to pick up the boys when the school day was done. Today Crowley would be driving them to the clinic for their blood draws at 1 so there was time to have a quick visit and still pick up the boys.

“Fancy seeing you here.”

Aziraphale’s stomach dropped. “Mr. Fann.”

Sandy grinned, standing closer to Aziraphale than he needed to. “You’re not here alone are you? Why don’t you join me? I’ll even treat you.”

“How kind of an offer.” Aziraphale tucked his phone away. “I have plans. I am just waiting to pick up my order.”

“Come sit with me while you wait then, we can have a bit of a chat.”

“Mr. Fann, I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be rude but I don’t know how else to tell you this: I am not interested in chatting, or anything else with you. I am seeing someone and very happy.”

“Aziraphale? Crowley’s order is ready.”

Aziraphale turned away from the silently fuming Mr. Fann and smiled warmly at the server. “Thank you so much Stacey, it smells wonderful.” She had boxed up the orders for him so he could carry it and the bright coloured smoothie easily to his car. He swiftly gathered up the order and left he café without another word or glance towards that odious little man. A few minutes later he was balancing the box of food and his smoothie as he tried to pull open the shop door. Crowley (who had been watching for him) rushed forward to open it for him and take the box from his arms.

“Oh, thank you.”

Crowley swooped down for a kiss, causing Bea, Ligur and Hastur to wolf whistle and jeer.

“Pack it in you perverts.”

“Another smoothie?” Hastur pointed his sandwich at Aziraphale.

Crowley tensed up beside him. Aziraphale placed his hand on the other man’s knee. “Well one can’t eat bacon sandwiches every day and keep this girlish figure, can they?”

Hastur snickered and went back to his lunch.

“Something wrong Magpie? You’re quiet today.” Crowley murmured in his ear as he slipped an arm around him.

“It’s nothing. Well, I had another run in with that terrible Mr. Fann.” Aziraphale made a face before taking another sip of his smoothie.

“What the fuck did he want now?” Crowley growled.

“Same as usual, I suppose. I had to be quite rude with him this time I’m afraid.”

“Did you tell him to fuck off?” Bea asked.

“No, I didn’t go that far, but I was tempted.”

“Do you want me to have a talk with him Magpie?”

“No dear, I’m sure it will be fine. I let him know in no uncertain terms that I had no interest in anything to do with him.”

“If he bothers you again, let me know. This is what, the third, fourth time? Is he stalking you?”

“Crowley, honestly. It’s a small village, I’m bound to see him from time to time. Now eat your lunch.”

“We can have a talk to him if you want,” Ligur grunted, mouth half full.

Aziraphale smiled softly. The thought of Hastur and Ligur wanting to help warmed him. “I don’t think we need to resort to violence.”

“Nah, we wouldn’t BE violent, just suggest some.” Hastur popped the last bite of his sandwich into his mouth and started on his chips.

Bea was texting while eating their own food. “Guy like that is dumb as shit Blonde, might help him to have his head knocked around a bit. Ugh. Dana keeps bugging me, she wants another pub night with you lot. For some reason.”

“Oh, how is that going?” Aziraphale was happy to change the subject.

Bea shrugged. “Good.”

“Bea doesn’t like to kiss and tell Magpie.” Crowley tightened his arm around Aziraphale as he sipped his coffee.

“Unlike some showy fuckers I know.” Bea grumbled.

Crowley ignored them. “We don’t get a free Saturday night for a couple of weeks. Could put feelers out for Tracey, or Ana I suppose.” Crowley stuffed a handful of chips in his mouth.

“ ‘We’ ?“ Bea raised their eyebrows.

“Yes, ‘we’ Bea. Now fuck off about it.” Crowley crumpled up his napkin and finished the last of his coffee. “Ready to go Angel?”

“Of course.” Aziraphale stood up and Crowley’s arm found it’s way around his waist.

“Leaving for a little afternoon delight?” Hastur asked.

“Good lord!”

“Fuck off,” Crowley stuck two fingers up in the air as he led his boyfriend out of the shop, leaving laughter behind them. “Horny beggars.” He opened the passenger side door for Aziraphale before trotting around to the other side to climb in himself. “Not scared of needles are you Angel? Need me to hold your hand?”

“How kind. I think I will manage.” Aziraphale took another small sip.

Crowley glanced over. “You sure you ok? Is it the Sandy thing? Cause I’ll talk to him. I’ll loom over him, I’ve got two feet on him at least.” He grinned. “Or is it the appointment?”

“Honestly Crowley, I’m fine, don’t fret over me. Watch the road, watch the road!”

Crowley swerved slightly to avoid a bike. “They know what they’re getting into, driving in the road with cars.”

“Goodness,” Aziraphale looked behind them. “I think you almost hit Anathema!”

“Wouldn’t be the first time.” Crowley said cheerfully.

“What??”

“Long story Magpie, I’ll tell you sometime. We’re here.” After opening the car door Crowley led Aziraphale into the clinic with his hand on the small of his back. Once they had been checked in they sat in the plastic chairs of the waiting room. Crowley did his best to wrangle his body into a somewhat upright position.

A nurse in a crisp uniform came forward a few minutes later with a clipboard. “Mr. Crowley?”

“That’s me. See you in a few.” He quickly kissed Aziraphale and sauntered after the nurse.

Aziraphale didn’t have to wait long until his own name was called and he followed a petit nurse into a small room.

 

“Hello Mr. Fell, I’m nurse Maude. I see from your chart that you’re here for a blood draw for sexual health screening.”

“Ye-yes, that’s correct.”

Maude smiled warmly. “No need to be nervous, just you and I here in the room Mr. Fell, having a bit of a chat. I’m going to ask you some questions if you don’t mind. First off, are you currently in a sexual relationship?”

“Um, yes?”

Maude blinked at him. “You’re not certain?”

“Well, there hasn’t been any, you know?”

“Penetration?”

Aziraphale’s whole body felt hot. “Yes.”

“What about oral sex? Any exchange of bodily fluids?”

“No!”

“Alright then,” Maude made some notes on in his file. “And when is the last time that you’ve had penetrative or oral sex and did you use a condom?”

“Um. Well.”

“Been a while? If you don’t remember exactly, just give it your best guess.”

Aziraphale mumbled quietly.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

“Never!”

“Never?”

“Never!”

Maude put her pen down. “Well, I must say, this is a first. What on earth are you doing here then?”

Aziraphale fretted with his hands. “I haven’t told my boyf-my partner that I’m, not, ‘experienced’ and when he suggested we get tested so we’d both have a clean bill of health…I’m afraid the whole situation has gotten rather far away from me.”

“My goodness. You’re not being pressured by your partner, are you?”

“No, no nothing like that. Crowley is, well, wonderful.”

Maude nodded and made some notes. “Well, we can still do the blood draw and send it off for tests, it is always better safe than never but think we can both say what those results will be. You honestly should have a chat with your partner Mr. Fell. One can’t have a good relationship when there are secrets. My Leslie and I, we tell one another everything.” She put on a pair of latex gloves and gathered her supplies for the blood draw. “I’ll tell you what I tell teenagers when they show up here. If you’re not able to talk about sex without giggling or feeling embarrassed, you’re not ready to be having it.” She wiped Aziraphale’s arm with an alcohol wipe. “I do hope you’ll speak to your man. Are we ready?”

“Yes, please.” Aziraphale looked away as she placed a tourniquet on his arm and quickly and efficiently did his blood draw.

“There we are love, all done. You should have your results texted to you within 48 hours.” She placed a small bandaid on his arm. “Oh, here!” she opened a drawer and gave him a pamphlet and a sample box of condoms. “It’s about safe sex and all that.”

“Oh good lord.” Aziraphale folded up the pamphlet and shoved it into his pocket as well as the box.

“God luck with you and your man Mr. Fell.”

Aziraphale scurried from the room face as red as a boiled lobster. Crowley was leaned up against a wall in the waiting area looking terribly cool and handsome. He straightened when he saw Aziraphale coming towards him. “Ready Angel? All ok?”

“Yes, fine, fine. Didn’t even hurt.”

Crowley’s arm found it’s way around his shoulders as they left the clinic and ambled towards the car. “Can I interest you in a bit of a snog session back at the shop before you have to go pick up the kids?”

“Temptation accomplished!”

 

 

Aziraphale climbed the stairs towards his flat that evening, tired but happy. The boys had been a bit out of sorts after school so he had taken them down to the beach and let them play in the sand, the weather was still holding, soon it would be too wet and dreary to do such things. Crowley had come home early with a curry takeout as a surprise and they had made a picnic of it, eating on a big tartan blanket on the lounge floor. Aziraphale had been able to eat more around Crowley than he had ever managed before and while the boys were playing Crowley had dragged him into the loo and kissed and praised him within an inch of his life. As he reached his flat and started to dig for his keys he heard voices from inside. Puzzled he tried the door and it opened.

Standing in the middle of the lounge was Newton, his arms crossed and a frown on his face and Sandy Fann. Aziraphale dropped his keys in surprise.

“Ah, hello Aziraphale.” Sandy said, smile on his face.

“Az, our landlord is here for an inspection even though he’s supposed to give us 24 hours notice.”

“As I’ve explained to you Mr. Pulsifer, one of the other units had an issue with their smoke alarms today, I’m sure you heard it going off when you came home! I’m checking all the units to make sure that there are no other issues. Don’t want to get a call at 2 in the morning and have to come out.”

Aziraphale scooped up his keys and eyed him wearily before closing the door. “If you say so.” He put his bag in its usual spot and toed off his shoes.

“I’ll only be a few moments gents.” He walked off towards Newton’s bedroom.

“I didn’t know Az, he just showed up a few minutes ago, I would have texted you and told you to stay out later. You can leave if you want.”

“No, no it’s fine, you’re here, it’s fine.”

Newton followed after Sandy. “I’ll get him out of here as soon as I can.” Before he made it to his bedroom door Sandy was coming out of it and heading towards Aziraphale’s room.

Aziraphale shuddered. The thought of that man in his room…Newton hurried ahead of him and was in the room, arms crossed. He would make sure that nothing was disturbed. When Sandy came out of the room he was frowning.

“Is there something wrong?” Aziraphale was sitting ram rod straight on the sofa.

“You have a cat.”

“Ash hissed at Mr. Fann.” Newton was smiling.

“He’s never hissed before in his life.” Aziraphale was shocked.

“Aziraphale, did you have a good lunch today?”

“Pardon?”

“You were being Crowley’s errand boy earlier, bringing him his lunch.”

Aziraphale squared his shoulders. “I was doing my boyfriend a favor and picking up the lunch he ordered for himself, his employees and myself so he could continue working. He’s a business owner. I’m sure you understand how busy he can be.”

“Boyfriend.” Sandy’s tone was flat.

“Yes. Serious boyfriend.”

“You have a cat.” Sandy said again.

“Yes, your point?”

“No pets allowed in the apartment. You’ll have to get rid of it.”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Now wait a minute, when the lease was signed there was nothing about pets.” Newton dug his phone of out his pocket and scrolled a minute before finding a picture of the lease. “Yeah, I’m looking at it here, there’s nothing about there being no pets allowed.”

“We’ll have to rectify it then, there’s no pets allowed.” Sandy crossed his arms.

“Mrs. Parkins downstairs has at least half a dozen cats.”

“She’s grandfathered in, been here for ages. It has to go. Or you can go.” Sandy shrugged. “Sorry, sometimes things don’t go the way you hoped they would. I’ll check back in a few days from now. If it’s not gone, you two will have to vacate the property. Have a good evening gents.” Sandy stomped out of the apartment slamming the door behind him.

The brothers stared after him, stunned. “He can’t, he can’t do that, can he Newton?”

“No, no he can’t, it’s not in our lease, he can’t.”

“Newton, I can’t get rid of Ash.”

“I know, I know. Um. Give me a minute.” Newton walked to the door and turned the deadbolt and added the chain. “I’m going to call Mom. It’ll be fine Az.”

Aziraphale fled to his room and picked up Ash and buried his face in his dark fur. “That awful man, that awful man! I hate him!”

 

Crowley was laying on his bed mindlessly scrolling on his phone. The boys were both sleeping, and the house was quiet. He wished that Aziraphale had stayed for the evening but he understood he had his own life outside of him and the boys. His phone rang causing him to jump then smile when he saw the name flash across the screen. “Hey Angel.”

“Crowley, I don’t know what to do!”

“Angel? Angel what’s wrong?” He sat up straight on the bed, concerned. Aziraphale sounded panicked.

“I can’t give him up, I just can’t!”

“Angel, where are you? Wherever you are, I’ll come to you! What’s happening?”

There was a shuddering sob down the phone line and a few gasps. “Mr. Fann, that awful man! He came to do an inspection today, something about the fire alarms, I don’t know, and he said that I had to get rid of Ash, that there are no pets allowed! Newton showed him the agreement that we signed and there’s nothing at all about pets in it, but he said that they aren’t allowed and either we get rid of Ash or we had to leave and I can’t give him up Crowley, I just can’t!”

“Fucking hell, that slimy bastard. This is just because you won’t give him the time of day, you know? He’s punishing you.” Crowley clenched his fists. “We can fight it Angel, you won’t have to give up Ash.”

“He’ll just keep doing something awful, keep popping by to check the pipes or something. Poor Newton, it’s not his fault!”

Crowley closed his eyes. “Ok, ok. Let me think. He owns your building and the flats by the library. Those are the only flats he owns in the village. If you don’t want to deal with him, there are other places in town for rent, I’m sure. I know Tracey has a flat above her place that she rents out and it’s empty right now, but it’s a one bedroom. I’m sure that there are more places over in Mooreside, but that would be a bit of a jaunt for Newt’s poor old car every day.” Crowley puffed out some air and silently cursed Sandy. “You could stay at my place if you like.”

“Crowley!”

“I know, not like that. I have an extra room, you know. It could be yours, and Newt’s if you two don’t mind bunking up until we find you something better. Live in Nannies are common enough.”

“I’m not sure…the boys…it would be an awful temptation Crowley.”

“I know, can barely keep my hands off you as it is. Look all I’m saying is there are options. You can bring Ash over here if you’re worried something will happen to him, we’ll look after him, you’re here every day anyway. He can even sleep on my pillow.”

“You’d hate that.” Aziraphale’s voice was watery but less panicky than a few minutes before.

“Every blessed minute.” Crowley agreed. “I’d still let him though.”

“Oh Crowley, I don’t deserve you.”

“None of that. Need me to come get you Angel? Or you could come over here?”

“No, no. I’m going to talk to Newton, I feel much better now. Thank you so much.”

“Anytime Magpie. Call me if you need me, or text, I don’t care what time it is. I guess I have to add Sandy to my ‘People to Murder for Aziraphale’ list.”

Aziraphale snorted. “Thank you darling. I think Newton is talking to Mom right now, perhaps I’ll call you again in a bit.”

“Take care Magpie.”

“You too darling.” Aziraphale wiped his eyes and put his phone down on his bed before scooping Ash up in his arms and heading out into the lounge.

“Yeah, I know legally we can fight it, but I don’t know if it will be worth it mentally.” Newton looked up when he heard Aziraphale’s door opened and motioned him over. “He’s here now Mom.”

Aziraphale sat down on the sofa close to Newton who turned his phone towards him. “Hi Mom.”

“Oh my poor little lambkins! Newton was telling me what happened! Azi, why didn’t you tell me this man was being so awful to you? I can’t believe it, how horrible. Do you need me to drive down there and speak to him? I will! I’ll give him a piece of my mind that’s for certain. He doesn’t have a legal leg to stand on, Newton sent me the lease and there is no clause against pets of any kind, certainly not my adorable little furry grandkitten! The nerve of him!”

“I know Mom. I spoke to Crowley, he said that we should fight it, but I don’t know, is it worth it?”

“It’s always worth it to stand up for yourself love! Do you remember when you were ten and I –“

“Mom,” Newton interrupted before she started on another story about their childhood. “We’ll figure it out, I just wanted to talk it over with you.”

“Crowley mentioned that Tracey has a flat that’s empty above her shop, it’s only one bedroom though. He did, uh, give me the option of becoming a live in Nanny. He said you’d be welcome as well, but we’d need to share a room. The other bedrooms upstairs are filled up I’m afraid, one’s a plant room, one’s an office of sorts.”

“Live in Nanny, what would you think of that lamby? You would be stuck there with your employer all the time, and the children.”

“I don’t think Aziraphale would mind that at all.”

“Newton,” Aziraphale warned.

“What do you mean?” Their mother looked concerned.

Newton glanced at Aziraphale. He mouthed “You didn’t tell her?”

“No!” Aziraphale mouthed back.

“Boys, if you think I can’t read lips at this point in my life – “

“Ahem. Did I mention that I’m seeing someone Mom?”

“You’re what? Lamb! You never said! This is so exciting! What are they like? Who are they? Are the kind? How long have you been seeing them? I need you to send me pictures! I had hoped that someday you would find a person for you, I always hoped that this day would come!” Mary clapped her hands together, smiling brightly.

“We’re very happy. We’ve been seeing one another for a while, taking things rather slow. He’s older. He’s wealthy. He’s my boss. It’s Crowley.”

Their mother was uncharacteristically quiet for what felt like several long minutes.

“Mom?” Aziraphale asked timidly.

“Right. I have a conference this weekend but next weekend I’m coming up there.”

“Mom-“

“If you haven’t settled this flat thing, I will help with that, and I’m going to meet this ‘Crowley’. Newton, are you hiding an older beau?”

“Um,” Newton scratched the back of his neck with his free hand. “Not really? Kind of maybe seeing someone but she’s only four years older than me.”

“I see. And you felt that you couldn’t tell me about someone special in your life either Newton?”

“Crowley’s 35!”

“Newton!” Aziraphale cried.

“Sorry, I panicked!”

Mary closed her eyes and held the bridge of her nose. “That is a bit on the concerning side, wouldn’t you say Aziraphale? Perhaps this is the person for you, and that would be wonderful. I want my children to be happy. I need to go now, but we will discuss all of this and my trip very soon. I love you both very much.”

“Love you too” both men mumbled. The call ended and Newton dropped the phone in his lap. Aziraphale slapped him on the shoulder. “Ow!”

“Crowley’s 35 Mummy” Aziraphale mocked.

“She sounded so disappointed! I didn’t want it directed at me.”

“Thanks a lot.” Aziraphale closed his eyes leaned back. “What are we going to do?”

“I think tonight we wallow, and maybe have a bit of a panic. Tomorrow we plan.”

“How should we wallow?”

“With extraordinary amounts of alcohol!” Newton was on his feet moving towards the cabinet they kept their meager alcohol supplies in.

“Go on then, pour me something.” Aziraphale went back to his room to grab his phone and shot off a quick text to Crowley.

A: Spoke to Mom. Newton told her about us.
She wants to come next weekend to meet you.
I’m sorry!

C: fuck

C: meeting the parents is big

A: I know, I’m going to try to persuade her not
to come but she won’t listen to me.

C: no prob ill charm her

C: you ok

A: No, not really. I feel better having spoken to you.
Newton suggested we wallow and panic tonight and
get ourselves together tomorrow. Tonight we drink!
Tomorrow we look at new flats I suppose?

C: offer still there for my place

A: I know darling, I’m thinking on it.

C: good

C: go drink with your bro send me drunk pics later

C: dont worry bout tmrw am ill take the boys to skool

A: I hate the way you text you terrible man. That was
painful to read!

C: u luv it

“Come on Az, drinks are poured!”

“Coming, coming.” Today had been a rollercoaster but sitting down with Newton on their warn sofa with Ash jumping on their feet while they got abysmally drunk seemed like the best possible ending to the night.

Chapter 15

Summary:

The brothers wake up Friday morning feeling less than ideal. Crowley drops by to take care of him with big Dad energy.

Notes:

There's some non graphic mentioning of vomit in this chapter. Anyone who has ever been hungover can probably relate.

Boy, this was a hard chapter to get out! I don't know about the rest of you but the weather here on the Atlantic coast of Canada has been up and down and the constant changes has had me having pressure headaches pretty much every day for two weeks, so spending extra time at a computer hasn't really been possible. Hopefully this short chapter doesn't have too many glaring mistakes, if it does just give me a heads up and I'll fix it! Next chapter we'll see Tracey and Crowley together again which will be fun.

I also added a little bit to the conversation between Newt and Az in chapter 1 because I realized I never mentioned any of Crowley's tattoos and you better believe that Mama Mary is going to mention them when they all meet up.

Keep safe everyone and thank you for reading

Aziraphale woke to the sound of retching and was pleased to realize it wasn’t him making those awful sounds. He was laying mostly on his bed (one leg dangling off the edge) still dressed. He had a second of panic that he had left his contacts in but opening his eyes and seeing the world in a blur let him set that worry aside. The massive wave of nausea that was rolling over him was of a more pressing concern. Sitting up felt nearly impossible but he managed it, hauling himself to his feet and holding on to the walls for support as he made his way out of his bedroom.

Newton stumbled out of the bathroom wearing only his pants. He headed for the kitchen and began gulping water straight from the faucet.

“Newton. Newton, last night was a bad idea. What did we drink?” Aziraphale’s voice was gravely and seemed impossibly loud in his own skull.

Newton rested his head on the counter, eyes closed. “Everything by the looks of the flat. Gin is empty. Vodka is empty. Empty cans of cider all over.”

Aziraphale’s insides made a bid to claw their way out of his body so he stumbled towards the loo, falling to his knees and retching into the toilet.

“You ok?” Newton called.

“I think I’m dying.” Aziraphale managed to choke out.

“I think I’m already dead.” Newton came into the bathroom and offered him a hand.

“Why are you practically naked?”

“Why are you still dressed?” Newton helped Aziraphale to his feet.

“Good lord Newton, I hardly remember anything from last night. Where’s Ash?” Aziraphale stumbled past his brother and began to look about the flat.

“He’s sleeping over there in the sun,” Newton pointed as he shuffled into his room and came back out with a pair of pajama pants that he struggled into. “Christ, I haven’t felt this awful ever.”

“What time is it?” Once Aziraphale spotted Ash he went into the kitchen and poured himself a glass of water and gulped it down.

“Just gone noon.”

“Noon? Newton, it’s Friday! The school!”

“I know, I know. Miraculously I heard my alarm and was able to call in. Hate to do it, only been there for such a short time but I think I was probably mostly drunk at 8 am.” Newton collapsed on the sofa pulling a quilt over his bare shoulders. “You best call Crowley, you’re in no condition to look after the twins today.”

“Oh dear.” As he began to search for his phone he noticed Ash’s dish over flowing with kibble and what looked like a dish of melted ice cream set down for him. He quickly put the dish in the sink.

A pounding on the door made both men jump and then collectively clutch their heads.

“Door,” Newton supplied helpfully.

“Yes, thank you Newton.” Aziraphale replied testily. He made his way over to the door and glimpsed through the peephole. “Crowley?”

“Special delivery Angel, open up.”

Aziraphale struggled with the locks before he was able to let Crowley into the flat who had two large grocery bags with him. “Hiya Angel, how’s the head?”

“What on earth are you doing here?”

Crowley pushed past him and shut the door with his foot. “Hi Newt, still alive I see?”

“Am I?” Newton moaned, head still in his hands.

“Crowley?”

Crowley put his bags on the kitchen counter and began unpacking them. “When I dropped the boys off and didn’t see Newton in the yard I guessed he had called off. When you didn’t answer any text messages this morning I figured you two had really tied one on and I better come and make sure you were still alive.”

“Oh god,” Aziraphale felt a wave of horror wash over him. “I’m still in my clothes from yesterday. I probably smell like vomit and old gin! Don’t look at me!”

Crowley snickered. “Angel –“

Aziraphale scurried to the bathroom slamming the door behind him.

“Ow.” Newton complained.

“Here mate.” Crowley handed him a bottle of paracetamol and a cold sports drink.

“Oh bless you kind sir.” Newton struggled with the pill bottle for a minute before he managed it and gulped down a couple.

While waiting for Aziraphale Crowley looked around the flat. Ash was sleeping in a spot of sunlight, belly large. There were empty bottles on the coffee table and sticky glasses as well as overturned cider cans. Empty bags of crisps and a melting tub of ice cream were littered about. He quickly gathered up all the trash and binned it. Aziraphale came out of the bathroom sheepishly, smelling of mint and wrapped in a tartan dressing gown.

“Go on, have a sit.” Crowley gestured to the couch beside Newton. He handed Aziraphale a bottle of sports drink and Newton handed him the paracetamol.

Aziraphale took both items thankfully and fell onto the sofa. After swallowing the pain pills with a few small sips of the sickly-sweet sports drink he cleared his throat. “What are you doing here darling?”

Crowley went back over to the grocery bags in the kitchen. “Like I said, when I didn’t see Newt at the school I guessed you two had really gone all in last night. I texted you a few times and then called and got no answer. Figured you were still in bed but would welcome some supplies.” He removed two large MacDonald’s bags and brought them over to the coffee table. “I know I always appreciated pure grease after a night like you two had.”

“Oooo,” Newton looked up and made grabby motions with his hands, the blanket slipping. Crowley dropped the bags on the coffee table in front of him. Newton quickly dug in, unwrapping a double cheeseburger and taking a huge bite, groaning with happiness.

Aziraphale made a face and looked away. “No, no no thank you.” He stood up quickly.

“Aw, sorry Angel, have another drink, you need the electrolytes.”

Aziraphale took another sip and then grimaced and shoved the bottle into Crowley’s chest as he hurried to the bathroom. He slammed the door behind him before throwing himself down on the floor and retching again.

“Christ. How much did you two drink last night?” Crowley put the bottle down on the coffee table and looked concerned towards the bathroom.

“So much Crowley. So, so much.” Newton was eating his second cheeseburger and realized he was sitting bare chested. He stuffed the last bite into his mouth before heading to his room to find a shirt. “You ok Az?” The only answer he received was the sound of heaving. He shook his head and went into his room and came back out pulling a shirt over his head, glasses crooked.

Crowley looked to the bathroom door itching to go in there. Instead he looked around the flat again, seeing what more he could do. He saw Aziraphale’s phone peaking out of a sofa cushion so he picked it up and headed for the bedroom. “Is his charger in here? Is it ok if I go in there do you think?”

Newton waved him on.

Entering the bedroom felt a bit weird, it was private and Aziraphale hadn’t invited him in yet. He did feel a thrill through seeing Aziraphale’s bed, allowing himself a moment to imagine what happened there. Shaking those thoughts from his head he went to the bedside table and plugged the phone into the charger. Seeing Aziraphale’s glasses he took those with him as he turned and headed to the bathroom. He knocked softly on the door. “Magpie, can I come in?”

“I’m extremely unsexy right now!”

“Impossible.”

Crowley heard a flush. “Alright.”

He opened the door and smiled when he saw a flushed Aziraphale sitting on the floor, his back leaning against the bathtub. Crowley placed the glasses in his hand carefully down on the bathroom counter, pushed his own up on his forehead and squatted down. “My poor Angel.”

“This is humiliating.”

“Nah.” Crowley looked around. He stood and ran a flannel under the tap then squeezed it out. He squatted again and gently wiped Aziraphale’s face and forehead.

“Oh, that feels amazing.” Aziraphale sighed, eyes fluttering closed.

“Course it does. How’s your stomach doing? Do you think we can wave goodbye to the toilet?”

Aziraphale scowled adorably. “I’m not one of your children Crowley.”

Crowley cackled. “Sorry, I’m finding this all pretty funny. Up we go.” He hauled Aziraphale to his feet.

“Crowley! Good lord!” Aziraphale clung to the other man.

“Rinse your mouth out like a good boy and then we’ll get you into bed.”

Aziraphale tried to pout again but did as he was told before putting his glasses on. “Oh dear. I look even more frightful than I thought.” He watched his reflection before turning away.

“Nah, you still look cute. Come on.” He pulled Aziraphale out of the small bathroom. “Let’s get you into bed.”

“If you two are going to do it while I’m dying on the sofa that’s cruel.”

“Newton!”

Crowley snorted. “Don’t fancy being vomited on during, that’s not my particular thing. Go on, get tucked into bed and I’ll bring you some water. And a bucket.” Crowley found Aziraphale’s water bottle and filled it with ice and cold water and found a bucket under the kitchen sink. “You should probably go back to bed too mate.”

Newton nodded. “Stomach’s feeling a lot better, thanks for the grease, but yeah, could use another forty hours of sleep or so. I’ll wait until you go so I can do the chain and the bolt. Don’t like the idea of that sleezy guy being able to come in while we’re sleeping.”

Crowley clenched his teeth and nodded. He had to remind himself that it was a bad idea to run over Sandy with his car. He went into Aziraphale’s room to find him in bed with the covers pulled up to his chin, still looking miserable. “My poor Angel.” He kissed his forehead then set down the bucket and water bottle. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m really embarrassed you’ve seen me like this. I don’t normally do this.”

“I know, we’ve known each other for months. I won’t hold it against you. I’ll bring it up for a laugh but I won’t hold it against you.”

“How kind.”

Crowley grinned. “I’ll be back in a minute pet, get comfortable.”

Crowley surveyed the flat again. He gathered up the food wrappers despite Newton’s weak protests and binned them, putting the rest of the food in the fridge. He put out some fresh food and water for Ash then picked the startled kitten up and brought him into Aziraphale’s room.

“Oh my poor baby. I shudder to think what I’ll find in the litter box later.” Aziraphale took Ash and cradled him in his arms kissing his head. Ash had been disgruntled being woken up by Crowley but was purring happily now.

“Alright. Get some rest. I’ll get the boys, don’t worry about a thing. Tomorrow we’ll tackle the living situation.”

“I can’t thank you enough, coming to check on us, the offer of a place to stay, just everything.”

“Angel, I do it because I care about you, yeah? I do it because it’s you.” He leaned down and kissed Aziraphale softly on his forehead.

A bit of colour blossomed on Aziraphale’s pale cheeks.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Of course. Bye Crowley.”

“Bye Angel.”

Crowley left the bedroom door open enough for Ash to come and go as he pleased. Newton was in the kitchen filling a glass with water.

“You get some rest too, and we’ll get all this figured out tomorrow.” He lowered his voice. “I don’t want that creep anywhere near Aziraphale again.”

Newton nodded. “Agreed.”

“Right. Lock up go pass out again.” Crowley headed for the door to the flat and waved before leaving, waiting until he heard the locks turning. Satisfied he headed out of the building and headed towards Tracey’s shop.

Chapter 16

Summary:

The brothers make a decision on what to do about the nightmare landlord situation and their new friends make it happen in record time.

Notes:

The interaction with Sandy is brief and shouldn't be triggering. There's a good bit of spice at the end of the chapter, and I'm happy to say the next chapter will be a continuation of the evening. I hope you all enjoy!

“So are you free tomorrow for lunch? Rose and Uriel are going to take the boys and I thought we’d brainstorm at my place. I want Aziraphale and Newton out of that flat as soon as possible.”

Crowley was leaning across the counter in Tracey’s shop, a mug of tea long since gone cold at his elbow. When he had first walked in Tracey had been excited to see him, ready to tease him about his “young beau”. She changed her tune as soon as she saw the scowl set on her friend’s face.

“Yes, of course. I don’t mind closing up the shop for the afternoon, this is important. Imagine the nerve of that dodgy old pillock! I’ve got half a mind to put a hex on him.”

“Sure Ana would help with that.” Crowley muttered.

“Aw duck, you’re really upset.” Tracey patted his hand.

“Aziraphale is being stalked and is essentially being forced out of his home. Poor Newton too, through no fault of his own.”

“We’ll get it fixed up Pet, no worries alright? Do you want me to bring anything tomorrow? Blood Mary mix maybe?”

“I’m not sure the brothers would appreciate that. They are in rough shape Trace, you should have seen them.” Crowley chuckled.

“Poor things.” Tracey clucked her tongue. “Well, we’ll get things right for them quick as can be.”

“Thanks Trace, knew I could count on you.” Crowley stood up and stretched.

“You want to take a look in my backroom? I have some new stock.” She raised her eyebrows.

“I think I’m good.” He grinned back. “Maybe I’ll drag Aziraphale here sometime. Can you imagine?”

Tracey smiled. “Yes, I bet that would be quite a sight.”

Crowley cackled on his way out the door, waving goodbye as he went.

 

“Listen arseholes, I want you to all be on your best behavior today, you got it? I’ve closed down the shop for the weekend, juggled our appointments all in the hopes that we are moving Magpie and Newton out of their place today, at the latest tomorrow.” He pointed a long finger at Hastur. “And nobody fucking mentions food to Aziraphale at all, you hear me? If he’s not eating, he’s not fucking eating, it’s no one’s business!”

“Christ what crawled up your arse and died today?” Hastur grumbled.

“Sorry, sorry. This whole situation has set my teeth on edge. I’d like to fucking strangle Sandy.” Crowley ran his hands through his hair for again nervously.

Dana snorted. “Think you’ll have to get in line there. You know, there’s been a lot of complaints about him and his buildings over the years. I know that your fella doesn’t want to make things worse by drawing this out, but I don’t know, might be something there.” She finished arranging cut up veggies on the platter and wiped her hands. “I’ll do some digging.”

“Thanks Dana.”

Anathema gave Crowley a quick hug. “Hun, you need to cool it ok? I know you want to rush in guns blazing and fix everything but you have to remember that Newt and Az are two grownups who can and will make their own decisions. We’re all here to support them, in whatever decision they make.”

“ ‘Guns blazing’? Can you be anymore American?” Crowley grumbled.

Anathema raised an eyebrow. “Yes, yes I heard the rest of it. I know.” Crowley bumped her with his hip.

There was a brief knock on the door before it was thrown open. “Helloooooooo! Look what fine young gentlemen I found to squire me to lunch today!” Tracey swept into the house with a sheepish looking Newton on her arm. Aziraphale was trailing behind them, Ash on his shoulder.

Dog excitedly ran to greet the newcomers, giving a happy bark and a wagging tail. “Hello Dog, nice to see you too.” Aziraphale carefully bent down to give him a pat and allow Ash to jump off his shoulder and run off with Dog. “Where are the boys?”

Crowley accepted a kiss from Tracey as she swept by him and patted Newt on the shoulder as he made his way towards Aziraphale. “Play date with Pepper. Hiya Angel.”

“Hello dear.” Aziraphale stood up and allowed himself to be pulled into a long tight hug.

Crowley ducked his head and kissed Aziraphale tenderly before pulling away and resting their foreheads together. “How are you feeling Angel?”

“Stop making out and get in here, we have shit to get done today!” Bea yelled from the dining room.

Crowley growled and Aziraphale smiled, slowly pulling himself out of Crowley’s arms. Crowley slipped his arm around his shoulders and led him into the dining room where everyone was waiting.

“How’s the head this morning?” Ligur asked, snickering.

“Yeah, do you want a bloody Mary?” Hastur asked.

“Ugh, no thank you. I’m fine, feel much better than yesterday, though my pride is perhaps a bit hurt.” Aziraphale sat down in the chair that Crowley had led him to.

“I feel bad but I’m kind of glad that the boys aren’t here. I don’t know if I could face them today.” Newton took a gulp of water from his battered water bottle.

“Well, they were very concerned about the two of you and I have ‘get well soon’ cards that they made that I promised you would take home.”

“That’s worse.” Newton slumped in his chair.

“It’s sweet, they love you. You’re a great teacher.” Anathema patted Newton on the arm.

“Yeah, and I missed a day teaching him because I was so hungover I thought I was dead.” He shook his head as there were snickers around the table.

“Oh buck up and tuck in, you’re only young once!” Tracey said as she reached for a cinnamon bun.

“Yeah, everyone fill your plates if you’re so inclined.” Crowley lowered his voice. “Anything for you Angel?”

“No need to mother hen me Crowley.” He reached for a cinnamon bun and put it on his plate.

“Yeah, yeah, sorry.”

“So, are we going to talk about fuckwad or what?” Bea pointed a baby carrot at Aziraphale.

“I would rather not, if possible.” He frowned. “I’m sure Crowley has filled you all in. It’s…unpleasant.”

“Are we talking about your landlord or your hangover?” Dana asked.

“Good Lord.” Aziraphale hid his face in his hands.

There was more good-natured laughter before Crowley spoke up again. “I should have taken a video of the two of you, honestly.”

“No one needs to see me shirtless eating cheeseburgers like my life depends on it.” Newton spoke up.

“I’m sure someone would like to see that,” Tracey said, wagging her eyebrows and looking at Ana pointedly. Ana blushed furiously and looked away.

More jokes were made, and stories shared of hangovers until Newton and Aziraphale were relaxed and at ease. Newton filled his plate twice and Aziraphale nibbled on his bun and some sliced apples while cuddled up to Crowley’s side, the older man’s arm around him protectively.

Dana pushed her plate away. “Alright, time to talk logistics here. Crowley explained things and it’s messed up. You guys have every right to be there with your cat, but I get that Handsy Sandy is being a total creep and it’s safer and better for your sanity to get out of there. Have you two had any time to think about where you will go?”

Newton sat up. “We spoke a bit last night when we were in better shape. We have ideas but we need some input. Crowley mentioned that you had a flat Tracey?”

Tracey smiled and picked up her phone. “Yes I do, it’s lovely really. I lived there myself for a bit before I was able to buy my little cottage. It’s a good size but only one bedroom.” She held her phone out and it was passed down to Newton. “I took some pictures last night, you can swipe through them. Mind how you go! Don’t swipe backwards, there may be some things you don’t want to see.”

Newton took the phone carefully and nervously began to swipe through the pictures. Ana leaned in close.

“Oh, it’s lovely Trace.” Ana said.

“Bit dusty but yes, I did have some good times there, back in my day. We can go take a look if you want, discuss rent and the like. You’ll be paying less than you’re paying now, I guarantee it. I don’t need much and if you help a poor old lady carry heavy boxes every now and then I’ll be ever so grateful.”

“You’ll have to introduce me to that poor old lady sometime.” Newton said, holding the phone out so it can be passed back to Tracey.

“Oh! You blessed charmer!”

“What about you Angel, did you give moving in here any thought?”

Aziraphale pulled away and hunched over his plate, crumbling the bun with nervous fingers. “Yes, I thought about it, and Newton and I talked it over. It would be the best solution, in a lot of ways but I have my concerns. What about the boys?”

“I spoke to the boys about it and asked them what they would think if you lived here with us, in the spare bedroom and they were over the moon about the idea.”

Aziraphale smiled. “That’s wonderful. Did you speak to them about us though?”

The table went quiet.

“Well, we should clear up some of these dishes, don’t you think?” Anathema asked, standing quickly.

Tracey stood up. “Yes, let’s get these leftovers put away.”

With amazing efficiency and speed the table was cleared and everyone was in the kitchen speaking very loudly about dishes and containers and who would take what home. Crowley stared at the group in the kitchen incredulously than cleared his throat. “Well, no, I haven’t spoke to them about us being together.”

Aziraphale slumped in his seat further. “I just don’t see how it will work Crowley. I want…I want so much with you,” he whispered. “If we are together every evening, alone, after the boys are in bed…I’m just worried it will carry over to the day with them. I don’t want to kiss you without thinking about it while they’re playing. It’s not fair to them.”

“I’ll talk to them. I will. Soon! Tomorrow! I’ll keep my hands to myself until then. I just want you safe Angel, and you’ll be safe here.”

Aziraphale nodded. “I’m not trying to pressure you or-“

“No, no I know that! I should have spoken to the boys already. They’ll be fine, happy even. They like you way more than they do me.”

Aziraphale snorted. “That’s not true.”

“It is! I can’t blame them! You’re so much nicer and prettier than me.”

Aziraphale grinned up at him and Crowley dipped for a quick kiss. “What do you say Angel? Are you ready to be a live in?”

“Yes!”

 

It was a whirlwind of an afternoon. Ash was left at the house while everyone headed back to the village. With the work van and personal cars they knew they could make short work of moving everything. Hastur and Ligur went back to the flower shop to find as many empty boxes and crates they could. Tracey, Dana and Ana went to Tracey’s flat to clean it and ready it for move in while everyone else went to the old flat to start packing it up.

“Seems like just a few days ago we were moving in here.” They had decided that Newton would take most of the things in the flat seeing as how Crowley had everything. Aziraphale was taking his favorite mugs and that was about it from the cupboards.

“I’m going to miss living with you. It was nice, seeing you every day again.” Aziraphale sighed. “It’s silly, but I’m quite sad all of a sudden.”

“Not silly. This sucks Az. We’re being forced into making major decisions very quickly and it’s hard and yeah, it is emotional. I know that you’re all grown up and god knows you’re smarter than I am in almost every way, but, I don’t know. Been looking out for you for more than half of your life now. It was nice having you here, knowing you were, I don’t know, safe.”

“Newton,” Aziraphale’s voice was strained. Newt turned and pulled Aziraphale into a crushing hug.

“You’re my brother, yeah? The brother I got to choose. We’ll still see each other all the time, and talk and text.”

“I know, I know. I’m being silly.”

“Hey, what did Mom always say? Feelings aren’t silly.”

“Right, right.” He pulled away and wiped his eyes quickly.

Bea walked over. “Why don’t you both go start packing your clothes or whatever? I can do the kitchen stuff. Those idiots should be here with boxes soon.”

“Can you reach the top shelf without a ladder?” Crowley asked.

“Can you fuck right off?”

Crowley snickered as he followed Aziraphale into his bedroom. He flopped down on the bed. “Do you want to take this bed with you Angel, or are you happy with the one at home?”

“Oh, that one is more comfortable than this one.” Aziraphale turned away from his closet and then blushed to the roots of his fair hair.

“What’s with the face?” Crowley asked, then grinned. “Oh Angel, is it because I’m laying in your bed.”

“NO!”

“Oh, I think it is. Did you picture me in here? With you?”

“Crowley,” Aziraphale whined.

Crowley stood up and stalked towards him, slowly backing him into the wall. “Oh Angel,” he breathed into his neck. “The things I want to do to you.” He abruptly pulled away. “But I made a promise to keep my hands to myself, and we’ve got a job to do.”

“Oh you absolute fiend!”

 

It took a surprisingly short amount of time to get things packed up between all of them. It was rather depressing to see everything go back into boxes, as it seemed like they had only moved to Tadfield so recently but really Halloween was just around the corner. Newton was taking most of the furniture, minus one of the bookshelves. Ligur was convinced to take Aziraphale’s bed and bedroom furniture for Eric who was moving into a cottage with some of his friends soon.

“I need to clean out the drawer of the nightstand!” Aziraphale cried when he saw Ligur start to lift it. He shooed the man out then slammed the bedroom door.

There were some snickers and Newton gave a stricken look. “I don’t want to know,” he mumbled.

Aziraphale had opened the door and tried to be casual but failed miserably. Hastur suggested taking those things back to their place to store for now, then filling the van with Newton’s belongings before filling it one last time with Aziraphale’s.

“Let’s pack some of this stuff in the cars, that way there’s more room in the van for the big stuff.” Crowley suggested. He heaved a box of books and headed out the door to the flat and nearly ran into Sandy.

“Outta the way.” Crowley snarled.

“What’s going on here? I got a call about an awful lot of commotion happening.” Sandy tried to look around Crowley and into the flat.

“What’s it look like?” Crowley sneered.

Newton stood behind Crowley in the open doorway. “Hello Mr. Fann. You’ll be receiving our written notice of departure shortly.”

Sandy looked stunned for a minute. “You can’t just break your lease and leave.”

“We can, and we are. You gave us an ultimatum, the cat goes or we go. We’re all going.”

Sandy sputtered. “You’ll forfeit your damage deposit and last month’s rent if you do that.”

Newton shrugged. “Not ideal but we’ll manage.”

Crowley shifted the books. “They’ll be out of your nonexistent hair in an hour tops, so you’ll have no more business with them, do you hear me? If you so much as look at Aziraphale again-”

“You’ll do what exactly Crowley?”

Bea pushed her way between both men and stood inches from Sandy. “Look, whatever you think you’re gonna get out of this it’s not happening. The kids are leaving, Blondie is heading into the sunset with Prince Charming here and you have an empty flat to rent out. Get lost.”

“This is my building!”

“And you have to give us 24 hours notice to enter our flat,” Newton said calmly. “If you want to stand here in the hallway while we move our things out, that is perfectly fine and well within your rights. I’d thank you not to interfere.”

Bea took the box of books from Crowley. “Drop your keys inside lover boy, I’ll take these down.”

Crowley dug the keys out of his pocket and dropped them in the box and slowly backed into the flat, eyes never leaving Sandy. He slammed the door once he was inside. “Fucking wanker.” He said loudly.

“I can’t believe he came. He’s here.”

“Yeah, and he’ll fucking leave if he KNOWS WHAT’S GOOD FOR HIM!” Crowley yelled.

“Hush dear.” Aziraphale clicked his tongue. “Don’t stoop to his level. It’s fine. I will ignore him.”

“I’m going to push him down the stairs.” Crowley muttered.

“Alright darling, you keep planning an ‘unfortunate accident’ and I’m going to pack up the last of my books.

“They’d be nothing unfortunate about it.”

“I know dear.”

 

“Yeah, thanks Rose, I owe you one. Not next week, I got Aziraphale’s mum coming, but week after that, I can take your hellion for the whole weekend if you want. Yeah, you’ve done us a solid.” Crowley was leaned against the door of the guest room, Aziraphale’s room now, watching him load books onto the scuffed-up bookshelf. He’d have to buy him a new one, maybe two, something that matched the dark sleek bedroom furniture. “Uh huh, ok. Yeah, well I’ll see if I can even get out of bed tomorrow, today was a whirlwind. Haven’t moved around that long since my younger days. Yeah, ok. Well, if they don’t want to say hi to their dear old Dad let them be, as long as they’re happy. Yeah, alright. Talk to you tomorrow. Ta.” He slipped his phone into his pocket. “Boys are staying the night with Pepper and we can pick them up however late we want tomorrow.”

“Oh! That’s very kind of them.” Aziraphale looked around the room and sighed. “Bit of a disaster but I don’t think I can face it right now.”

“We’ll get it all set up to your liking soon enough. Come here, you’ve had a bit of a day, how are you feeling?”

“That’s an understatement for sure.” Aziraphale made his way around the boxes and suitcases and all but fell into Crowley’s waiting arms. “Oh, this feels heavenly.”

Crowley tightened his arms around him. “Are you hungry? You barely ate at lunch and I don’t think you had any of the pizza at Tracey’s.”

“Newton’s.” Aziraphale corrected.

“Yes, Newton’s. It’s a nice flat, he’ll be happy there I think.” Crowley slowly rubbed up and down Aziraphale’s back.

“I think so. It’s a bit closer to the school, and he has his own space. I’ll miss him though.”

“I know Magpie, but you can see him whenever you want. You won’t be held prisoner here at home with me and the boys. Now, you ignored me before, are you hungry?”

“I know I probably should be but I’m just drained I think.”

“Hmmmm. How would you like to have a shower and afterwards we’ll have a bite of something? Just relax and we’ll worry about sorting everything out tomorrow.”

“That does sound nice.”

Crowley pulled away slightly then took Aziraphale’s hand. “Come on, let me introduce you to my shower, the best part of this whole house.”

Aziraphale swallowed thickly as they passed by the king sized bed covered in dark bedding.

The master bathroom was decadent to say the least. All dark tile and smooth lines, the shower a truly epic size. Crowley explained all the settings to Aziraphale and then made to leave.

“Oh. I thought…”Aziraphale trailed off and fiddled with the hem of his shirt.

Crowley froze, mind reeling. “Did you think,” he started, voice husky, “That I’d be joining you in the shower?”

“Um…”

“Is that something that you’d want Angel?”

“Yes,” Aziraphale whispered.

Crowley crashed their mouths together in a wet and messy kiss drawing an indecent moan from Aziraphale’s throat. He pulled back. “The things you do to me Angel,” he groaned then nipped at the pale neck in front of him.

Aziraphale moaned again and arched his back. “Darling!”

Crowley groaned and began to frantically undress, shimmying out of his jeans and ripping his shirt off over his head.

Aziraphale gasped and reached out, lightly tracing over the tattoos on his chest and upper arms. “Crowley, these are beautiful.”

“Nah, just some ink. You’re the beautiful one. Come on, let me see you!”

“In a minute, let me admire you.” Aziraphale swept his hands over Crowley’s chest, through his sparse red chest hair and down towards his sharp hips. “Gorgeous,” he sighed.

“Ngk.” Crowley’s face flamed under the gentle scrutiny. “I’m in my pants and socks and you’re all buttoned up still. This isn’t fair!”

“Oh, my poor darling.” Aziraphale mock pouted. His eyes fell on the sizeable bulge in Crowley’s pants and he felt his own cock twitch.

Crowley hopped from foot to foot as he ripped off his socks. “Angel, you’re driving me mad here.”

Taking a steadying breath Aziraphale quickly shucked off his trousers and kicked them away. “We’re doing this. We’re really doing this!”

Crowley laughed. “You’re adorable, you know that?” He slid his hands in Aziraphale’s hair and kissed him again. The kiss turned heated quickly, tearing moans from Aziraphale’s throat. Crowley reached down and cupped Aziraphale’s bum cheeks, squeezing.

“Oh fuck!”

Crowley shuddered. “When you talk like that…” He kissed Aziraphale harder, in a near frenzy.

Aziraphale broke the kiss and gasped for air.

“Take this off, please, can I take this off?” Crowley whined, hands on the buttons of Aziraphale’s shirt.

“Yes!”

Crowley unbuttoned the shirt with fingers trembling with excitement and bushed it off his shoulders. “An undershirt? You’ve got to be kidding me!” Aziraphale giggled and Crowley growled at him, ripping the offending garment off and tossing it aside. “Fuck Angel, you’re so fucking pretty.” He latched onto the soft white chest, biting his way down it.

Aziraphale’s knees trembled as he clung onto Crowley’s frame. “Crowley, Crowley.” He was panting and whining, trembling all over.

Crowley tore himself away and stumbled towards the shower, setting the temperature. “Come here Angel, let me get you inside. Let me have you.”

Aziraphale scrambled to tear off his socks and fiddled with the waist band of his briefs nervously. Crowley smiled wickedly at him as he slowly pushed his own briefs down over his hip, his cock springing free.

“That’s so much bigger than Jim.” Aziraphale’s eyes were wide.

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “Jim? Old boyfriend?”

Aziraphale dragged his eyes away from Crowley’s cock and sputtered. “No, not, um…can we not talk about that right now?”

Crowley ran a hand lightly up and down his erection and sighed. “Whatever you want but if you don’t get those off right now, I’m going to explode.” He turned and climbed into the shower, the warm spray of water hitting him. “Come on Angel.” Aziraphale lowered his briefs and kicked them away and climbed into the shower. “There you are. Can I?” Crowley’s hand hovered over Aziraphale’s dripping cock.

“Yes, please.”

Crowley gasped him and slowly began to move his hand. Aziraphale cried out and all but fell against the taller man. Crowley held him tightly with his free arm. “Oh, you feel so good Angel, so good.”

“Crowley, I’m not going to last.”

“I know sweetheart, I know.” He kissed Aziraphale sweetly. “Did you get your test results back yet? I’m clean.”

“Oh, yes, I am too.”

“Perfect.” Crowley sunk to his knees and nuzzled the base of Aziraphale’s cock.

“Crow-Crowley what are you-”

“I’m going to taste you, can I taste you?” Crowley’s voice was husky, his pupils blown wide.

Aziraphale whimpered in answer.

Crowley smiled wickedly before licking him from root to tip.

“Oh Jesus!” Aziraphale’s hips bucked.

Crowley gripped the padded hips tight enough to leave bruises before taking as much of Aziraphale as he could into his mouth.

Aziraphale wailed, throwing his head back. His hands went to Crowley’s hair and gripped him tightly, pulling slightly.

Crowley moaned around his mouthful as he bobbed up and down.

“Crow-oh god, Crowley, it feels so good. I didn’t know it would feel this good! Your mouth! If you don’t stop I’m going to-oh god!”

Crowley bobbed his head faster, sucking and sliding his tongue along the underside of Aziraphale’s member filling his mouth. He pulled off, looking up at the younger man who was nearly wrecked already. “You can, you can come. I want you to. Right down my throat Angel. Give it to me.”

Aziraphale’s mouth hung open before he was engulfed in the wet heat of Crowley’s mouth again. Crowley look him a little deeper until his tip was nudging into Crowley’s throat and that was it, Aziraphale’s whole body shook and shuddered as he came with a mindless shout, curling himself over Crowley’s back.

“Delicious,” Crowley’s voice was gruff as he stood up and backed Aziraphale into the shower wall, kissing him before moving onto his neck, nipping and sucking.

Aziraphale was still shuddering. “Do you, oh darling, do you want me to-”

“Just touch me Angel.” Crowley reached for the small bottle of lube he kept in the shower and poured a bit in Aziraphale’s hand. Nervously he reached out and grasped Crowley who groaned into his neck. “Fuck Angel, I’m so hard. I’m going to come so hard. Keep going, hold me tighter. Ah! That’s it.” He was thrusting into the tight slippery fist, chasing his pleasure. He came with a groan, barely holding himself up.

Aziraphale watched fascinated as his hand was covered in someone else’s cum that was soon washed down the drain.

“Oh Angel, my Angel.” Crowley sighed. He kissed the flushed cheek and sighed. “Let’s get you washed up before the water runs cold. I’m dying to see you in my bed. I’ll get us something to nibble on.

Chapter 17

Summary:

Aziraphale has something that he needs to confess to Crowley but is worried about how he will react.
Crowley has some things he needs to explain himself.
Together they share a real adult conversation then end up having some "adult" time together.

Notes:

Oh hello friends, are you surprised to see me so soon? I decided to post this early, consider it a gift of mostly smut. If smut isn't your thing, skip the last half of the chapter.
There's some discussion of kind of child abandonment? It's brief but if that's triggering please skip out after Azi's confession and head straight for smut town.

In the next chapter we'll meet Mama Mary.

Thank you for all the lovely comments and kudos, they seriously mean the world to me. I never thought I'd ever feel comfortable posting any writing publicly but the reception I've gotten has just warmed my cold cold heart

Stay safe and kind friends

“You’re such a good boy.”

Aziraphale shivered at the praise as he bit into the strawberry Crowley held to his lips.

“You’re so good, so beautiful.”

They were laid out in the big king size bed under the soft sheets and duvet, a plate of strawberries, grapes, cheese and crackers between them. Crowley had been feeding Aziraphale bites from the plate slowly, praising him every time he took the offered food and slowly chewed. Aziraphale laid back on the soft pillows. “I can’t eat anymore.”

“You did so well Angel, so good.” Crowley broke up a piece of cheese and shared it between Ash and Dog who had been waiting near their feet, inching closer and closer to the plate. He set aside the dish and settled into the bed, pulling Aziraphale close to him. “Hmmmm nice having you here, in my bed. Been dreaming about it for ages.” He trailed his fingers along Aziraphale’s bare back. “You smell like me too now, it’s nice.”

Aziraphale chewed on his bottom lip nervously. “Crowley, there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you for a long time, but it’s…embarrassing.”

“What is it love?”

Aziraphale’s cheeks burned and his heat thumped wildly. “Back then, in the shower? That was my first time receiving, you know, a blow job.”

“Seriously?” Crowley was stunned. “What kind of selfish exes do you have in your closet Angel?”

Aziraphale pushed on, unable to slow the words as they tumbled out of his mouth. “That was also the first time that I gave someone a, ugh, ‘hand job’ sounds so juvenile doesn’t it? That day, on my sofa at the flat? When we, you know, enjoyed ourselves so much? That was the first time I did that with another person, ever. Oh, and at the pub? When we kissed? That was my first kiss. Ever.” He sat up and looked at Crowley. “I’m a virgin Crowley. I’ve never done any of this with anyone before.”

Crowley’s mouth was hanging open as he struggled to sit up.

“I’m sorry, please don’t be angry with me! I was just so embarrassed and I thought that if you realized how inexperienced I was, you wouldn’t take me seriously, and I so wanted you to take me seriously!”

“We got blood work done.” Crowley stated.

Aziraphale hid his face in his hands. “Don’t remind me, that was a whole different kind of humiliation.”

“Angel, you should have told me. I feel like so sleezy now.”

“What, no, no no no no no! You did nothing wrong!” Aziraphale was practically in Crowley’s lap, arms thrown around him. “I was just so, so stupid. It’s humiliating Crowley, I’m a 22 year old virgin, and you’re this super attractive cool man, with kids and his own business who buys me a fucking car and I can’t even, I can’t even, ugh!” He buries his face in Crowley’s neck. “Please don’t be angry with me.” He says in a small broken voice.

Crowley slipped his arms around Aziraphale. “Azi, I’m not angry with you. I wish you would have told me and I’m seriously having a really hard time believing that you haven’t had scores of guys falling at your feet. I would have been more gentle, I would have gone slower this whole time. I feel like I’ve been pressuring you, not on purpose but just because I assumed. When you asked to go slow I just thought it was because you wanted this to be a real relationship, and because of the kids, not because this was all new to you. I would have done better.”

“We did go slow! You have been gentle. Crowley, I’ve been almost ‘dying of horniness’ as Newton put it, pretty much since I met you. It’s all new to me. I never, well, before I met you, I just never really wanted to do anything like that with anyone else.”

“What about Jim?”

Aziraphale tried to bury his face deeper. “Jim is a dildo.” He said quietly, voice muffled.

“What?”

“I said Jim’s a dildo!” He cried. “ ‘Slim Jim’ is a healthy six inches. He’s blue and he’s rather a new purchase. Oh, I wish the floor would open up and swallow me whole.”

Crowley chuckled. “Hey, no, I’ve finally got you naked in my bed and you’re taking about disappearing? Owning a sex toy isn’t a crime Magpie.”

Aziraphale peaked up at him. “You’re not angry?”

Crowley sighed. “No, I’m not angry. I wish you had, I don’t know, trusted me more? Felt more comfortable? I wish you had told me, but no, I’m not upset. You really never did any kind of experimenting or anything with someone before?”

He shook his head. “No, I always thought I was maybe, I don’t know, a little off? I mean, I, you know, did stuff, on my own. But I just never felt the urge with another person. I could appreciate someone was attractive but never wanted to do anything with them.”

Crowley smiled. “Maybe you’re demisexual and maybe it was love at first sight? Because I do love you Angel. I’ve never said it, but you know it don’t you?”

“Oh Crowley! I love you too! I’m so sorry, I’ll never keep anything from you ever again, I promise!” Aziraphale covered Crowley’s face with kisses before Crowley captured his lip and they shared a long languid kiss. Aziraphale sighed after breaking the kiss and fell back on the pillows. “I feel lighter now. I shouldn’t have kept that from you.”

Crowley hummed and was quiet for a minute. “Um, Angel, in the spirt of sharing there’s something that I probably should have explained to you by now. I don’t know, maybe you already know, it’s sort of an open secret in a village this small.”

“Feeling not so light again.”

“No, no sweetheart, nothing like that.” Crowley reached for Aziraphale’s hand and kissed his knuckles before holding it and gently sweeping his thumb over it while he spoke. “It’s about the boys, and their mum. You’ve never asked where she was.”

“Oh, well, I assumed it was private. That you would tell me if it was important. The boys never mentioned her so I didn’t know if she perhaps wasn’t with us any longer or just didn’t want to be part of your lives.”

“How did you think that me, a very gay man, managed to have two children, just out of curiosity.”

“Well, I assumed the usual way. That you were bi or pan or something. People who are gay sometimes still manage to have children the ‘old fashioned way’ Crowley, before they are out. It happens all the time.”

“Ha, I suppose. Not me though, knew what I was early on. Look, it’s complicated but you remember I told you about Harry, my sister? Harriet?”

“Yes, of course.”

Ok, here goes. We had been really close growing up, always running around, causing trouble. We both went away to Uni but she dropped out after the first year and got swallowed up by London. Mum and Dad were less than useless and she stopped answering my texts and calls after a while. I worried about her, you know, but we were adults and could do whatever we wanted with our lives. Not saying it didn’t hurt, but you can’t control other people. I ended up here, somehow, and started the business. It was all landscaping and stuff before we really got going, I was tired all the time, always dirty but we got things up and going and got the shop done and we were doing great, you know? I had hired the guys and Bea and it was just like we were in high school but not as stupid or reckless anymore. I was pushing 30 but had shit under control. I bought the land and built this house, had land to grow flowers and shrubs, the shop was doing well, I was making good money, great money, and we had our regular landscaping jobs. Barely had time to eat three meals a day let alone have a proper shag so a partner was out of the question. I was happy though, you know?”

“It’s a lot to accomplish, you were right to be proud.” Aziraphale beamed at him.

Crowley waved him off. “I got a call one day, it was just gone six and it’s fucking Harry on the other end of the line. ‘Hey Crowley, what’s up?’ she has the nerve to say, just like we had spoken that morning or something. Been three years since I last heard from her. Then she only goes on to say she was sitting in the hospital having bloody twins and I better get there soon because if I didn’t come pick ‘em up she was putting them in care.”

“Crowley!”

“Yeah, so I’m fucking dumbstruck but I drive up to London, find her and she’s had them. They’re in their little cot thing and they’re so tiny Aziraphale, so god damn tiny. The whole drive up I’ve been preparing this speech, telling Harry that it’s her mess and I’m going to clean it up and she’s got to be a mother, I wasn’t fit to be anyone’s dad…I took one look at them lying there together and that was it, they were mine.”

“Darling, of course you did!”

“She had all these papers for me to sign, felt like I was signing my life away. She signed away her parental rights, the father signed his away and there were adoption papers to sign. It was all so quick I figured it was a scam, you know? Had them looked over afterwards but they were legit. The father was some rich married twat and if you have enough money you can make anything happen in a hurry I suppose.” He ran his free hand through his hair. “Tried to keep in touch with her, you know? Send her pictures and updates. She called me up and said ‘Look Crowley, I know you’re going to think I’m a total bitch and that’s fine, but these aren’t my kids. I don’t need to know how they’re doing.’ Can you believe that?”

“My god!”

“She fucked off over to America. Last I heard from her she was married to some conservative politician who no doubt doesn’t know that she had twin kids during an affair and gave them to her gay brother. So, that’s why we don’t talk about her. The boys don’t know. I’m their Dad and they haven’t ever really asked about a Mom, which is a bit strange now that I think of it.”

“Oh darling, that’s horrible. The boys are certainly safer and happier where they are. You’ve given them a wonderful life, and you are a wonderful father.”

“They’re happier with you in their lives now.”

“Oh, surly not.”

“They are, they love you. I love you.” Crowley gently placed a hand on Aziraphale’s cheek before kissing him softly. Aziraphale sighed into the kiss, his eyes fluttering closed. The kiss deepened until they were laying in the bed, Crowley hovering over Aziraphale.

Aziraphale thrust his hips so their hardening cocks could rub together, making Crowley break the kiss and hiss. “You’re playing with fire here tonight Angel.” He growled. “If I didn’t know you were so innocent I’d flip you over and have you.”

Aziraphale groaned. “You can have me, please Crowley, oh god I want you so badly.”

“Angel,” Crowley whined. “You can’t say things like that to me, I’m trying to be good here.”

“You are Crowley, you’re so very good to me. I need you though, please?”

Crowley kissed the pout off Aziraphale’s lips and pushed his tongue roughly into the other man’s mouth. The kiss grew more and more heated before he broke it, leaving them both gasping. “Hands and knees like a good boy.”

“Oh god!” Aziraphale scrambled to comply.

Crowley sighed happily. “This is just a fantastic arse, you know? Gotta be top ten in the universe.” He ran his hands from Aziraphale’s shoulder blades down his back and onto his backside, squeezing one cheek with each hand. Aziraphale’s hips jerked and he moaned softly.

“Just beautiful.” Crowley kneaded the cheeks lightly before spreading them. He leant down and licked Aziraphale from his bollocks to the small of his back.

Aziraphale’s arms gave way and he landed face first into the pillow already panting. “What, Crowley, oh god, that’s so dirty.”

Crowley licked over the tight pucker in front of him eliciting another cry. “Do you want me to stop Angel?”

“No!”

Crowley cackled. He leaned over towards the nightstand and took out a bottle of lube and close by. He spread Aziraphale’s cheeks again and began licking and sucking at his hole like a man starving, driving all kinds of wanton sounds out of him. Saliva was dripping down onto the bedsheets and was smeared on his chin but he didn’t care. The sounds that Aziraphale was making was driving him crazy. He began to circle the slickened rim with a fingertip before breaching it slightly, working the tip in and out. “Ok there Angel? Want me to stop? Slow down?” He reached for the lube and poured some on, working it in with his finger slowly.

“Don’t you dare stop!”

Crowley laughed again and kissed one plush arse cheek as he watched his finger disappear into the tight heat of his boyfriend.

“Oh god!”

Crowley kissed his lower back. “Relax sweetheart, relax. I won’t hurt you. I want to make you feel so good.” Crowley slowly rocked the finger back and forth before adding more lube and a second finger. He scissored them back and forth slowly.

“Ah! Crowley, I’m ready!”

“You might be ready for Jim but you’re not ready for me.” He thrust against Aziraphale’s thigh. He added more lube and slowly inserted a third finger. “You’re doing so well for me, I wish you could see how well you’re taking my fingers. Your tight little hole is so greedy for them, fuck, I bet you could take four, couldn’t you?”

“Crowley!”

“I won’t make you take four, not today, but another day, another day I’ll spend an hour eating you out and fucking you on my fingers, make you take them all.” He searched for the spot he had been avoiding and brushed up against it. Aziraphale wailed and his knees gave out completely. Crowley smirked and removed his fingers, wiping them on the sheets. He manhandled the panting Aziraphale onto his back with a pillow under his hips. “Be easer if you were on your knees, but for your first time, I want to be able to see you.” He leaned down for a quick kiss before situating himself between Aziraphale’s bent knees. “You sure Angel, really really sure?”

“Yes, yes please!”

Crowley upended some lube over himself and smeared it all over his aching cock before adding some more to Aziraphale. He gripped himself and slowly began to push against the loosened rim.

Aziraphale was breathing rapidly, his chest heaving and groaned when he felt Crowley’s cock begin to spear him open.

“Relax, relax.” Crowley soothed, rubbing one of his legs soothingly. When he felt Aziraphale relaxing for him he slowly pushed forward while watching Aziraphale’s face carefully for any sign of discomfort or pain. After what felt like an eternity the head of his cock had finally breached him. “Fuck!” They both groaned at the same time. Crowley screwed his eyes shut and clamped down almost painfully hard on the base of his penis. “Angel, you’re so fucking tight, gonna last about five seconds.” He opened his eyes. “You alright?”

“You feel huge.” Aziraphale managed to choke out, eyes tightly closed.

“It’s just the tip so far.” Crowley tried not to swell with pride.

“Just the tip?” Aziraphale’s eyes opened wide.

“You want me to stop, we can stop here.”

Aziraphale flung his legs around Crowley’s waist. “No!”

“I’ll go slow.”

Slowly, so slowly, Crowley worked himself into Aziraphale’s tight heat with shallow thrusts. He hiked one leg up on his shoulder and kissed every part that he could reach while speaking a steady stream of praise, endearments and curse words. With one final push Crowley shuddered. “There, that’s it, you’re taking all of me now. How do you feel?”

Aziraphale was trembling, his cock red and dripping onto his stomach, a sheen of sweat on his skin. “I feel, oh darling. I don’t even know.”

“I’m not hurting you, am I? I should have spent longer preparing you.”

“No, no, it feels, odd. But nice? I feel very full.”

“Let me know when you’re ready for me to move.”

“Oh, I think you could move now, but go slowly!”

“Of course Angel.” Crowley began to thrust his hips in slow shallow movements, closing his eyes to savor the feel of everything and listen to the little moans Aziraphale was making. He angled his hips and felt Aziraphale clench around him while his back arched.

“Ah! There! There!” Aziraphale’s hands scrambled on the sheets before he found Crowley’s muscular thighs and he clawed at them, urging Crowley forward.

Crowley began to lengthen his thrusts and moved with a bit more force, mindful of not being too rough for Aziraphale’s first time. It was hard to hold back, hard not to chase his pleasure.

“Crowley! Crowley!”

“I know,” Crowley grunted and reached between them and began to fist Aziraphale’s cock. “Are you going to come for me Angel? Fuck, let me see it, let me feel it. You feel so good around me, so tight.” He sped up his thrusts again as Aziraphale clawed at him, moaning lewdly. “Fuck Angel, gonna come, want you to come first and then I’ll come, fill you right up.”

Aziraphale arched his back and screamed as he came, covering his stomach and chest with come.

Crowley slowed down and worked Aziraphale through it, trying to prolong his orgasm before he finished himself.

Aziraphale was gasping and writhing underneath him. “I love you,” he gasped. “I love you. I love you.”

Crowley thrust deeply once, twice three more times before he shuddered and cried out and all but collapsed on his lover. He gasped trying to catch his breath and slow his heart. He made to move and Aziraphale clutched at him.

“No, please. I’m not ready for you to go yet.”

Crowley nodded and carefully rolled them so they were on their sides facing one another, foreheads together, gasping and breathing in one another’s spaces. Finally biology did it’s work and he slipped out of Aziraphale with a grunt. “Sorry Angel, should have used a condom.” He managed.

Aziraphale’s eyes were closed. “I kind of like it? I like the idea of something of you still being in me? Makes me feel like I’ve been marked by you or something.”

“Oh you kinky fucker.” Crowley grinned, delighted. “We’ll have to go to Tracey’s and get you a plug maybe. That way you can keep me inside you for hours if you want.”

Aziraphale nodded before hiding his blushing face in Crowley’s neck.

“Oh Magpie, we’re going to have so much fun together. I didn’t hurt you did I? wasn’t too rough?”

“No, it was perfect.”

“I’ll get up and get a cloth, clean you up.”

“Can you just stay, like this for a bit? Feels so good, don’t want to move.”

“Listen to you, you’re drunk on sex.” Crowley crowed.

“Try not to sound so pleased with yourself.” Aziraphale cuddled closer.

Crowley hooked the duvet with a long leg. “Not every day I get to take your virginity and give you the shag of your life.”

“You’re impossible.”

“And you love me.”

“I do. Now shhh.”

Chapter 18

Summary:

Crowley has a heart to heart with the twins about relationships and what is happening between he and Aziraphale.

Notes:

A small update today. I know I promised the Mother Meeting in this chapter but it was feeling too bulky so I had to split it up. Hoping to have the next chapter up later in the week or early next week.

This is a pretty smutty and fluffy chapter, I hope you enjoy!

It was still dark when Aziraphale woke up, overly warm and out of sorts. He reached out for his phone that was usually on his nightstand but felt only soft sheets. As he became more aware of his surroundings he registered the body pressed tight against his back, a strong arm wrapped around him. Ash was on his pillow beside him as usual but everything else was strange.

“G’back to sleep Magpie.” Crowley mumbled into Aziraphale’s curls. “Still dark.”

“Oh!” Aziraphale startled. “I forgot for a moment, thought I was in the flat.” He relaxed back down into Crowley’s arms.

Crowley squeezed him tighter. “Mine now,” he mumbled.

Aziraphale smiled at the possessive gesture and slowly rubbed the arm that was holding him so tightly. He could smell Crowley’s shampoo and the sharp scent of sex and his mind instantly began to replay everything that had happened only hours before. Almost without realizing what he was doing he pushed back and wiggled about, his bottom grinding against the half hardness he could feel behind him.

Crowley hissed and moved his mouth to a creamy shoulder. “What are you doing Magpie?”

“I thought, since we were both awake, and the boys aren’t home…?”

“I’ve created a monster. Angel, I’m 35 fucking years old, not 19. The spirit is willing but the body is weak.”

Aziraphale reached behind him and grasped Crowley’s hardening cock slowly moving his hand up and down it’s length. “It feels like your body is just as willing as your spirit.”

“Oh christ. I’ll be shooting dust at this point. Where’s the lube?” He ran his hands down the cleft of Az’s wiggling backside. “Oh fuck, you’re still open and wet for me.” He groaned and bit into the thick shoulder as he slowly pushed two fingers into the wet heat of him, feeling the mess of lube and his spend.

“Oh Crowley,” Aziraphale moaned pushing back against the fingers. His hand blindly searched around the bed for the lube and Ash stood up and jumped off the bed, disgruntled at all the noise and movement. When he found the bottle tangled in the sheets and he shoved it behind him.

Crowley wasted no time in slicking himself up. “Here, put your leg up, yes like that Angel.” He used one hand to hold Aziraphale’s cheeks apart and the other to slowly feed himself past the pucker of muscles. Once he bottomed out he wrapped one arm tightly around Aziraphale’s chest and with his other hand tight on one plush hip he began to thrust. They didn’t speak in the darkness of the bedroom but they moved together, Crowley driving forward and Aziraphale pushing back, the wet sound of sex and skin slapping, a groan or bitten off moan filling the room. Crowley covered Aziraphale’s neck and shoulder with kisses and stinging love bites as he worked himself in and out of his lover in a steady rhythm.

“More,” Aziraphale breathed.

Crowley pulled out despite the cry of protest and climbed to his knees. He rolled Aziraphale onto his stomach than pulled at his hips so his bottom was in the air. Swiftly he plunged back in causing Aziraphale to cry out into the pillow. “Fuck Angel, like a vice you are.” Crowley grunted. He held a hip tightly and ran his other hand up the pale flawless back and pushed down between his shoulder blades, pinning him to the bed.

Aziraphale shuddered and moaned.

“You like that do you? Me holding you down? Using you?” Crowley thrust harder.

“Yes, yes!”

“You act like you’re all sweetness and sunshine but now we see what you’re like.” Crowley growled. He held Aziraphale by both hips now, pulling him back as he thrusted hard.

“Oh god Crowley!” Aziraphale shoved a hand underneath himself.

“No! You’ll come on my cock or you won’t come at all.” Crowley growled again.

“I can’t, I can’t!”

“You can, I know you can.”

Aziraphale was writhing and moaning into the pillow while Crowley pummeled him. His orgasm felt like it was ripped from him when he came spurting onto the sheets the pillow muffling his cries.

“Fuck, fuck yessssssss!” Crowley groaned as he felt Aziraphale clenching wildly around him. He pounded into him wildly before he came with a shout. When he caught his breath he pulled out with a groan. “Fuck, Magpie you ok? Got a little out of hand there. I didn’t hurt you did I?”Aziraphale mumbled something into the pillow as he collapsed completely into the mattress. Crowley climbed off the bed on wobbling legs and made his way to the bathroom. He came back with a warm cloth and carefully and slowly cleaned Aziraphale.

“Ah, that stings a bit.” Aziraphale mumbled.

“Shit, yeah, shouldn’t have fucked you a second time tonight. Roll over. Careful now.” Aziraphale flopped onto his back and Crowley wiped up the mess. “Good thing the bed is big, move over to my side more so you’re not sleeping in a wet spot.” Crowley tossed the cloth on the plate on the bedside table and crawled back into bed with Aziraphale. “Can’t remember ever coming three times in one night.” Crowley mused.

“Mmmm”

Crowley kissed the head of sweaty curls under his nose. “Go back to sleep Angel.”

 

Crowley startled awake as Ash landed on his chest and Dog was whining on the floor. The sun was bright in the bedroom, too bright. “Christ what time is it?” Aziraphale was still sleeping curled on his chest. Dog whined again. “Alright, alright I’m coming.” He shooed Ash off his chest and carefully climbed out of bed, trying to not to wake up Aziraphale. He shoved on his sunglasses and grabbed a pair of briefs on his way out of the bedroom and struggled into them while the dog and cat raced ahead. Stopping off at the boys room he opened up Floppy’s cage. “Morning you.” He scooped up the rabbit and headed downstairs. Dog was prancing in front of the door leading to the back garden. “Sorry boy, didn’t take you out for a wee before bed.” Dog bolted outside as soon as the door was opened, Crowley followed along and jumped when his feet touched the cold dewy grass. “Shit!” He tiptoed to Floppy’s hutch and put him inside, making sure he had lots of food and water before heading back to the house shivering. It was truly Fall now. Dog ran in ahead of him bolting for the kitchen. He nearly tripped over Ash who was twisting between his legs meowing. “Worst than the boys.” He grumbled on his way to feed them.

Aziraphale woke up to an empty bed but the spot beside was still warm. There was a noise that had woken him and it took a few more seconds to recognize it. He stumbled out of bed looking for his phone before remembering it was in his trousers in the bathroom. He hissed as he bent over to fish it out of his pocket. “Hello?” He asked in a sleep thick voice.

“Lamb? Why aren’t you wearing a shirt? What are those marks on your chest and my goodness your neck!?”

Aziraphale stared dumbly at his mother’s face on his phone screen for a few seconds before he yelped and dropped the phone back into the pile of his discarded clothes. “Uh, just a mo Mom, dropped the phone, butter fingers!” He fished out his briefs and pulled them on before pulling his shirt over his head. He picked up the phone and sat down on the closed lid of the toilet and winced, adjusting how he sat.

“What is happening Az?”

“Sorry Mom, I was changing and answered without thinking.”

“You sounded mostly asleep. It’s 11am Aziraphale. It’s not like you to sleep the day away, since you were a little one you were always up early. What on earth happened to you? You look like you’ve been attacked!”

“I had a late night and a long day Mum, have you been speaking to Newton at all?” He avoided her questions.

“Yes, I have. He informed me that you both moved yesterday.”

“Yes, it was rather a whirlwind but things are mostly settled.”

‘Moved in with your employer boyfriend.”

“Mum, it’s not like that, I have my own bedroom.”

“Angel, are you hungry? I’m starving, we burned off a lot of calories last night! You want to go out or is your bottom too sore? We can order something in, or I’ll cook for you, anything you want. Christ, I’ll have to do a wash before the boys come home, the sheets look like a Jackson Pollock painting! Kind of impressive honestly.”

Crowley sauntered through the open door of the bathroom where Aziraphale sat frozen and horrified.

“Oh, you’re speaking to someone, sorry.”

“Sorry about that MUM.” Aziraphale glared at his boyfriend.

“Fuck! I mean fudge, shit. Sorry about that Mrs….Aziraphale’s Mom.” Crowley called across the room.

There was a long awkward pause before Mary spoke. “I see you’re rather busy Lamb, I’ll let you go. I just wanted to see how things went from your perspective since your brother was kind enough to call me last night and let me know that you two were out of that awful man’s flat, but clearly you’ve been a busy bee. I’ll be in touch about my visit later in the week.”

“Alright, sorry again Mom, Crowley is barely house trained.”

“Love you Lamb.”

“Love you too.” Aziraphale put his phone down on the bathroom counter. “Crowley!”

“I’m sorry! I didn’t know you were speaking to someone, just thought maybe you were using the loo, or I don’t know, washing your face. The door was open!”

“A Jackson Pollock painting!” Aziraphale huffed on his way past Crowley. “Honestly!”

 

“Dad!” Lock barreled into Crowley’s open arms.

“Hey little man! How are you? Did you have fun?”

“We played lots of games and chased the chickens!”

“Did you now?” Crowley set Lock down and scooped Adam up. “Hey little hellion.”

“Hey Dad. What’s that on your neck?”

“Uh…not sure, probably a bruise from all the moving we did yesterday.” Crowley used his free hand to adjust his collar.

“I hear moving bedroom furniture can be particularly exhausting and sometimes dangerous.” Rose smiled as she ambled up, Pepper on her hip.

“Rose,” Uriel warned as she followed with the boys backpacks.

Crowley cleared his throat. “Thanks again, yesterday was crazy, not having to worry about these two trouble makers made a big difference. I hope they didn’t cause you too much grief.”

“No more than the usual amount. All moved in then?”

Crowley put Adam down and opened the backseat door for the boys before taking the backpacks. “Yeah, we got Newton and all his stuff moved and then Aziraphale moved into our place.”

Lock and Adam squealed and started jumping up and down. “Az is really going to live with us?” Adam asked.

“Forever??”

“Well, I don’t know about forever Lock, but yes, he’s all moved in. Hop in, let’s get you buckled so we can get on home to him alright?” When he had the boys settled and in the car he thanked Rose and Uriel again for their help and started off for home. The boys were chatter boxes and Crowley smiled as he listened to them and laughed along with their stories. When they were almost home Crowley cleared his throat. “Hey guys, can I talk to you about something? I’m going to pull over real quick ok?”

The boys exchanged looks and Lock reached out for Adam’s hand, gripping it tightly.

Crowley noticed in the rear view mirror. “Nothing bad! I promise, all good alright? I don’t want anyone to be nervous or upset.” He pulled into the parking lot of the grocery store, unbuckled his seatbelt, and turned so he could face his sons. “Big exciting news, Az living with us now, right?”

“Yeah. Jenny White’s Nanny lives with them. She has her own room that Jenny says she’s not allowed to go into.” Adam quipped.

“Yeah, there are lots of families who have Nannies who live with them and you’re right, their room is private, when Az is in his room and the door is closed we have to give him his privacy alright?” Both boys nodded and Crowley nodded along with them before rubbing the back of his neck nervously. “So um, you guys like Az right?”

“Duh,” Adam snarked.

“Alright smart arse, can the attitude. I like Az too. Really like him. A lot. Yup. I really like Az.” Crowley plowed on. “Ok, you know how in some houses there are a Mom and a Dad? Like with Brian or Jeremy’s house? Or a Mom and a Mom, like with Pepper? Well, there are some houses that have two Dad’s.”

“Like Tango Makes Three!” Lock said excitedly. “Will you read me that tonight?”

Crowley smiled. “Yes love, I can read you the penguin book tonight. What I’m getting at, is there are all kinds of couples and families, yeah? And that’s a good thing. Sometimes there’s just one Mommy or one Daddy too, like in our house, yeah? And sometimes that Mommy or Daddy starts to get a little lonely for another adult and so they decide to take someone that they like very much on a date.”

“Dad, what are you talking about?” Adam asked, letting go of Lock’s hand and crossing his arms.

“I’m just wondering how you would feel if I took someone on a date? Would that be ok?”

Both boys shrugged.

“Oh boy,” Crowley mumbled. “Would you be ok if I took another man out on a date?”

Again, they both shrugged.

“Do you guys even know what a date is?”

“It’s when you eat dinner with a candle in the middle of the table.” Adam said mater-of-fact.

“And you have chocolates in a heart box.” Lock added.

“And you kiss.” Adam made a face. “Pepper’s Mom’s are always kissing.” Lock nodded in agreement.

Crowley tried to tamp down the grin that was threatening to overtake his face and nodded. “Yes, you can do all those things on a date, you are right. I have another very important question. Would you two be ok with the idea of Az and I going on dates?”

Two sets of eyes looked back at him before Lock leaned over and whispered into Adam’s ear, Adam nodding along while he listened.

“Would you two kiss?”

Incredibly Crowley felt his cheeks warm. “Yes, uh, I guess we would kiss sometimes. But!” he hurried seeing the horror dawning on his boys faces, “not around you two, just when we’re alone.”

“Alright then.”

“Alright?”

“Yeah,” Adam shrugged. “Can we go home now? I wanna play with Dog.”

“Yeah, yeah ‘course.” Crowley turned around in his seat and buckled up. As he pulled into traffic he let out a long breath he hadn’t realized he had been holding.

 

The boys barreled in through the open door kicking their shoes willy nilly and throwing their bags and jackets down on the floor.

“Oi, get back here you ruffians and pick up your stuff!” Crowley called after them.

“Az! Az are you here?” Adam yelled. “Hi Dog! I missed you!”

Crowley sighed and tidied the shoes and picked up the discarded backpacks and followed the noise to see where the boys had gotten. He found them upstairs jumping on Az’s bed, dog bouncing up and down yipping along with them as they both tried to speak at the same time.

“I missed you! Daddy said you were sick, are you still sick? Mr. Newton was sick too and we missed him at school.”

“Ms. Messenger was our teacher and she’s so mean! She made us count and count and count and we hardly had any time to draw!”

“She only read two stories!”

“Mr. Newton is waayy better! He doesn’t make us count as much and always does lots of stories!”

“With voices and everything!”

“You live here now!”

“Goodness, goodness! I thought you’d be all tired out after your weekend with Pepper! Yes darlings I’m feeling ever so much better now. I’m sorry that Ms. Messenger wasn’t as much fun as Mr. Newton is at school, you will have to tell him tomorrow! And yes, I do live her now, what do you think of that?”

Lock bounced into Aziraphale’s arms.

“Oh my! Careful darlings, Adam you come down from there now.” He squeezed Lock tight.

“I want a hug too!”

“Of course, of course.” Aziraphale scooped Adam up as well and hugged both boys tight. “Oh, I missed you my darlings.”

“Are you going to be here every day?” Lock asked.

“Yes everyday darling.” He set the boys down and startled when he saw Crowley lingering in the doorway with a decidedly besotted look. “Oh! Hello dea-there. Hello.”

“Hi.”

They smiled at one another while the boys looked at them.

“Are you going to kiss now?” Adam asked, sticking his tongue out.

“What?!” Aziraphale chocked, cheeks blooming. “What? Of course not, why would…? Adam!”

“Apparently that’s what people do when they date Magpie. Remind me to buy you a heart-shaped box of chocolates.” He pushed off the doorframe and came into the room properly.

“Oh!” Aziraphale sat down on the bed. “So, um, you boys are alright with your Dad and I having dates?”

“Yup.” Adam was crouched on the floor giving Dog a belly rub.

Lock went over to his father and pulled on his hand. “Dad, is Floppy outside? Can I go out and say hello?”

“Yeah, alright. Why don’t you take Dog out for a wee Adam? Put your jackets on.”

“Come on Dog!” The three ran from the rooms and thumped out the stairs. Both men winced when they heard a door slam.

“They didn’t put their jackets on.” Crowley sighed and sat down next to Aziraphale. “Hi.” He grinned.

“Hello Darling.”

Crowley leaned in and captured the blonds lips in a sweet kiss. “As long as they don’t see us kissing they’re just fine with the dating thing.”

Aziraphale smiled. “You told them.”

“I said I would, didn’t I? They were fine. They love you Magpie, so much. Now we just have to make sure that your mother loves me.”

“After your performance today?”

Crowley flopped back down on the bed. “Not my finest moment. Is she going to take the piss out of me for it?”

“I would say there is a high probability of that.”

“Fantastic.” Crowley stood up and stretched. “Alright, no point in dwelling on it now. I gotta to make sure my rugrats are still in the garden. Help me put fresh sheets on the bed later?” He wiggled his eyebrows.

“Of course. Can’t have you sleeping on a bare mattress.”

“Aw Angel, you’re not going to sleep with me tonight?”

“It’s probably best we give the boys a bit of time to adjust to one thing at a time, don’t you think?”

Crowley pouted. “Was nice, having you in my arms last night.”

“Crowley, stop trying to tempt me and go check on your children.”

“Angel, if I ever stop trying to tempt you, there’s something very, very wrong with me.” He grinned as he sauntered away, a little extra sway in his step, Aziraphale helpless but to stare while his cheeks heated up.

“Fiend.” He muttered under his breath, his own smile starting.

Chapter 19

Summary:

Aziraphale's mother finally comes to town and Crowley meets her face to face. He tries his best to survive the meeting.

Notes:

Whew, that was difficult chapter to wrangle, I hope it reads alright! It's fluff friends, plain and simple. I had hoped to get it out earlier but the Easter long weekend kind of kicked my butt.
As always, I hope you enjoy and stay safe friends.

“Crowley for fuck sake, sit down!” Bea hissed.

“Language!” Lock called out.

“Bea you have to put a pound in the bad word jar!” Adam sang.

“Listen you little sh-“

“Bea!”

“Crowley, you’re going to wear a hole in the floor.” Anathema sighed. “They’ll be here soon and you looking like a nervous wreck isn’t going to help anything.”

“Aren’t they just dropping by anyway? Isn’t the real deal tonight when you get grilled by the mother-in-law?” Bea didn’t look up from the picture they were coloring with Lock on the counter, Lock sitting in the middle of scattered markers.

“Look Bea-” Crowley growled, long finger pointing.

The jingling of the door made everyone turn. “Hello all!” Aziraphale called brightly.

“Down, down!” Lock whispered to Bea who helped him down. Both boys ran to Aziraphale who had squatted down to hug them.

“Hello Darlings.”

“You were gone FOREVER.” Adam complained.

“So sorry about that.” Aziraphale stood up and motioned behind him where Newton stood with a woman dressed sharply in a grey pants suit. “Boys, I want you to meet my mother Mary. Mary, this is Lock and Adam.”

Lock clung to Aziraphale’s leg while Adam stared up at the woman.

“Hey guys! It’s ok to be nervous when you’re meeting someone new but remember, Aziraphale and I wouldn’t introduce you to someone to be afraid of, right?” Newton had also squatted down so he was eye to eye with Lock who slowly nodded.

“You’re the same colour as Pepper and her mums.”

“Adam!” Crowley hissed.

Mary raised an eyebrow. “Am I?”

“Yeah. Pepper’s mums are brown like you, but how come Azi and Mr. Newton and you are all different colours if you’re their mum?”

“Adam!”

Mary smiled. “Well, I didn’t meet Newton or Aziraphale until they were little boys, older than you and your brother. They had different mothers who weren’t able to care for them any longer so they came to live with me. I loved them so much they stayed with me and I became their Mum. Do you understand?” Adam nodded and stuck out his hand for her to shake. “It’s very nice to meet you, Adam. You as well Lock, but you don’t need to shake my hand.”

Aziraphale clapped his hands together. “Lovely. Uh, Mum? This is Bea, pronouns they/them. They are one of Crowley’s oldest friends and they sort of run things her at The Garden.” Bea waved from their spot behind the counter. “This here is Anathema, she/her. She also works for Crowley and does some art programs at the community center. She was one of the first people I met in Tadfield after we moved.”

Anathema stepped forward. “It’s so nice to meet you Mrs-”

“Hodges, it’s Ms. but you can call me Mary.” She took Anathema’s outstretched hand and shook it warmly.

“Mary then. Your sons are a wonderful addition to the village. Newton is loved at the school and Aziraphale is a hit at our live drawing classes.”

“That’s lovely to hear. I’ve heard some lovely things about you as well from my boys.”

Aziraphale awkwardly shuffled over to Crowley’s side with Lock still latched to his leg. “Um, Mum? I’d like you to meet Anthony Crowley. He/him. Uh, he prefers to be called Crowley.”

Crowley grinned and took her outstretched hand. “It’s lovely to meet you in person Mary, Aziraphale has told me so many wonderful things about you.”

“Did your sheets come clean?”

Crowley mouth fell open and he went red to the roots of his hair while Aziraphale squeaked and cried “Mum!”

Mary dropped his hand. “Just curious, you sound so concerned about them. Now! Isn’t this a lovely shop? I noticed you named it “The Garden” is that a reference to the original Garden? Aziraphale didn’t mention you were religious, he normally steers quite clear from anyone with strong ties to religion on account of his upbringing don’t you Lamb?”

Crowley closed his hanging mouth and swallowed. “Uh, yeah, not religious at all, very gay, very agnostic. Can’t remember the last time I was in a church, probably burn up or something if I tried to go into one. The name was sort of as an inside joke I suppose? I hired friends to work with me and we were all a bit on the wild side growing up so we’re like the demons invading the garden I guess?” He rubbed the back of his neck. “Seemed funny at the time, was younger then.”

“Yes, I assume you were quite young when you got that tattoo on your face there, don’t see a lot of people with face tattoos do you? Though I suppose it is becoming more common. Is that a general snake or a particular one? The original serpent perhaps? Oh, and while I’m thinking of it why are you wearing sunglasses inside? Seems rather odd.”

“Mum!”

“It’s fine Magpie. Light sensitivity, wear them pretty much all day. Keep it fairly dim at home so I can go without them once the sun has gone down. If I don’t wear them I get killer migraines and I’m useless for days.” He pointed to the snake. “Youthful stupidity.”

“Our Dad has a lot of tattoos. A LOT.”

“Yes, thank you Adam.” Crowley said through clenched teeth. He motioned to the shop. “Have a look around, please.”

“Come see the koi in the pond Mum. Boys, do you want to show Mary the fish?” Newton asked.

Adam pried Lock off Aziraphale’s leg and led him off in the direction of the pond, Newton leading Mary and pointing out different things.

“Oh my god.” Aziraphale whispered.

“She hates you.” Anathema said quietly.

“Ok, well, I don’t think she hates me Ana, thank you very much for that, just, you know, not a big fan yet. Right?”

“What was that about the sheets?” Anathema asked.

It was Aziraphale’s turn to turn dark red as he turned on his heel and went after the group.

“Ana, Ana you gotta stay for dinner tonight.”

“Oh no, I said I’d come over and entertain the boys for you until bedtime while you got things ready but no, no way.”

“Please? This is awful. Please!”

“Crowley….”

“What if Newt stays too?”

Ana fiddled with the lace on her sleeve. “Fine, but only because I don’t want you and lover boy to stroke out.”

“Not the kind of stroking they usually do.” Bea snorted behind them.

“That’s not helpful!” Crowley hissed, pointing a long finger their way.

“Or untrue.” Anathema covered her laughing mouth.

“Not helping!”

“Crowley built this up on his own, when he was younger Mum, he works with his friends. I assume Ligur and Hastur are out on a job right now, they do landscaping and weddings and everyday arrangements.”

“It’s very lovely in here, lots of beautiful blooms.” They were all walking back to the front of the shop, Adam’s sleeves suspiciously dripping.

“I was going to make a bouquet for you to take home, or maybe a plant but I wasn’t sure what you would like best.” Crowley walked up to them. “Can I make you something?”

“Oh, I haven’t a green thumb at all I’m afraid, if it isn’t plastic I can’t take care of it! At least when it comes to plants anyway, and as lovely as a bouquet would be, it would be a bit unwieldly on the train I’m afraid. Lamb, your flat must have just been brimming with plants and flowers, dating a man with a floral business.”

“Um, well, no actually.”

“Your boyfriend owns an entire business based on flowers and you’ve never gotten a bouquet?”

“Newton!” Anathema said much too loudly. “Will you come over tonight to Crowley’s? Seems a shame to take you away from your mom, and I’m going to be there to wrestle the boys into bed, seems like I’ll earn a bit of wine and grub afterwards.”

“Yes Newton, that would be wonderful, we haven’t gotten a chance to see much of one another this last week.” Aziraphale said, pleading with his eyes.

“What? Uh, yeah, um, sure if that’s alright I guess I could come over…”

“You can come over and play with Dog!” Adam shook his arms sending droplets of water everywhere.

“Oi! Keep your grubby little hands out of the Koi pond! You’ll have Dana after you if those fish get sick!” Bea called from their perch.

“Boys! You know better than to stick your hands in the Koi’s home!” Aziraphale tutted. He turned to Newton and Mary. “We best be going if we’re going to have tea with Tracey.”

“Yes, she’ll be waiting for us. I guess I’ll see you all later tonight. Bye Bea!” Newton waved. Mary smiled at everyone before being led away by Newton.

Bea grunted in answer and began to tidy up the markers that were scattered over the counter.

“I’ll see you both there.” Aziraphale waved them off. As soon as the door closed he sagged in Crowley’s arms.

“Boys, look away there’s going to be kisses.” Crowley warned.

“Ewwwww!” Adam squealed as he led Lock behind the counter where they could hide.

“Crowley, I hope you have very, very good wine for tonight.”

Crowley squeezed Aziraphale tightly. “Fuck Angel,” he kept his voice quiet. “It’ll be alright, promise. At least she wasn’t outright hostile.”

“What a thing to be thankful for!” Aziraphale stood on his tiptoes to kiss Crowley softly, ignoring the retching sounds from Bea. “I best be off. I’ll see you this evening.” He pulled away. “Goodbye boys!”

“Bye Az!”

 

Aziraphale caught up with his family as they headed towards Tracey’s, feeling flustered.

Mary slowed down and took his arm. “Hello Lamb. Why the long face love?”

“Did you have to calm Crowley down?” Newton asked.

“Why ever would he need calming down?” Mary asked, innocently.

Aziraphale looked between the two of them as they were walking and seeming to be struggling to keep their expressions neutral. “Oh you monsters!” They both started laughing, Mary holding on to Aziraphale for support as she stumbled. “I can’t believe you! He’s back there worried that you hate him! I’ve been worried sick! Mum!”

“I’m sorry Lamb, I really, really am. It was just too tempting not to play the horrible mother-in-law.”

“Mother-in-law! We’re only just dating! There’s no talk of marriage!” Aziraphale blushed hotly. “I need to let him know that this was all for fun.”

“That man is gone for you, anyone could see. Let him stew a bit though Lamb, I’ll set it all to rights when we go over later this evening. It’s good for him to have a bit of a scare! Imagine! Just blabbing on about the state of the sheets like that!”

“Why do you keep talking about sheets?” Newton asked.

“Fawn, love, give it a good ol’ think won’t you? Why might Crowley have been blathering on about how the sheets needed a good wash in the morning?”

Realization dawned and Newton made a face. “Oh god, gross! Oh god, why do you know about that?”

“He started blathering on about it while I was on the phone with Lamb, he didn’t realize we were on a call. It was…uncomfortable.”

“Like this is!” Aziraphale whined.

“Wait, so you guy…? Az! Why didn’t you tell me?” Newton asked, slapping Aziraphale on the back.

“Oh, honestly you two are the absolute worst! Can we not have a ‘Aziraphale lost his virginity’ conversation please!”

“It’s a big deal!”

“I’m twenty two!”

“All the more reason to celebrate!”

“I hate you both so much.”

“No you don’t Lamb, you love us.”

“I do.” Aziraphale couldn’t help but smile as they neared Tracey’s shop. “But if my boyfriend has a heart attack before the night is over I’ll love you a bit less.”

Mary smiled. “Noted.”

 

“Adam, I already told you that you can be a zombie robot for Halloween, we just have to figure out how to make the costume.” Crowley sighed. “Please, listen to Auntie Ana ok? It’s well past your bedtime.”

“Why can’t we stay up until Az comes home?”

“We’re not sure when he’s coming, he’s spending time with his Mum and brother, he hasn’t seen his Mum in a long time so we have to let him be alright? You get to spend all sorts of time with him.”

“I guess.”

“Adam Crowley! Get in this bathroom and finish brushing your teeth or I’m going to put a hex on you!”

“Uh oh.” Adam looked at his dad.

“Yeah, I’d get going if I were you. I’ll come up in a minute for hugs alright?”

“Adam!”

“Coming!”

Crowley watched Adam scramble up the stairs before heading back to the kitchen. He and Ana had made a truly ridiculous amount of finger foods for the evening. There were mini quiches, sausage rolls, falafels, marinated prawns. The goats cheese bruschetta was ready to pop in the oven when everyone arrived, the raspberry cheesecake bites were cooling.

“Well, the monsters are in bed, though I doubt they will be asleep anytime soon. What do you need me to do?” Anathema nudged Crowley to the side so she could wash her hands.

“Uh, you made the guacamole, the bean dip is made. We won’t put out the pita chips until everyone is here. The cheese and meat tray are in the fridge. Plates and napkins and everything are in the lounge, the fireplace is set, wine is chilling.”

“Relax babe. Time for me to start making the cranberry margaritas!”

“Not sure we should introduce tequila into the mix.”

“Tequila is just what we need! Loosen you guys up!”

Crowley rolled his eyes and busied himself with arranging the fruit and veggie trays. The sound of the front door unlocking made Crowley and Ana exchange a look. “Go on, I’ve got this.” She gently pushed him towards the door.

“Do I look alright?” Crowley looked down at himself. He was wearing a nicer pair of black jeans with a charcoal gray cashmere sweater that fit him well.

“Of course you vain thing, go on!”

Crowley reached the foyer as Aziraphale was leading Mary and Newton further into the home.

“Hiya Angel,” Crowley smiled warmly. “Hello again.” He nodded at Mary and Newt.

“Hello dear, how are you? Oh! This is nice.” Aziraphale reached out and ran his hands down the sleeve of the dark shirt.

Crowley suppressed a shiver and leaned down for a lightening quick kiss. “Thanks Angel, starting to get colder, time for me to break out the jumpers, cold blooded thing that I am.”

“That’s because you don’t eat enough! You’re so thin! You can’t survive on coffee alone Crowley.”

“I eat plenty, especially with you cooking for me and the boys half the time.” They shared a smile before turning away from each other.

“Oh! Come in, come in. Isn’t Crowley’s home lovely?”

Mary looked around, smiling. “It is very nice, bit less cluttered than I’d think, with two boys running around.”

“Don’t look in any closets or their bedroom.” Crowley joked.

Ash came running up from wherever he had himself tucked away and rubbed against Aziraphale’s legs. “Ash! There you are, come and meet your grandmother.” He scooped up the purring cat and held him up to Mary.

“Oh look at you, you darling little thing! Oh, your poor widdle eye!” She held out her hands and Ash was transferred happily.

“Come into the lounge, I just have to check on Ana in the kitchen.”

“I’ll come help.” Aziraphale offered.

“No no, you sit Angel.”

Anathema popped her head out of the kitchen. “I’ve got this Crowley, you better go give the boys hugs before Adam leads a munity.”

“Oh, are they still awake? I’ll come as well.” Together they made their way up the stairs and quietly to the boys’ room, Crowley pushing the door open slowly and slipping inside followed by Aziraphale. They both gently kissed sleeping boys’ good night and gave Dog a quick pat before slipping out into the hallway. Crowley left no time in crowding Aziraphale up against the wall.

“Angel, missed you today.”

“Missed you too darling.” The blond inclined his head and licked his lips. Crowley grinned and leaned down, kissing him deeply, one hand gently cupping a cheek, the other sliding around to cup his bottom. Aziraphale moaned into the redhead’s mouth before pulling away. “Crowley!”

“Sorry, I couldn’t resist.” He kissed Aziraphale on his upturned nose and took his hand to lead him back downstairs to join everyone else.

“It smells heavenly in here,” Aziraphale said as he walked into the lounge, eyes going wide at the amount of food spread over the coffee table. “Good lord, how many people did you think were coming Crowley?”

Crowley ran his hands through his hair. “May have gotten a bit carried away. Dig in everyone.”

Soon everyone had a full plate balanced on their knee and a drink in hand. Crowley angled himself on the sofa beside Aziraphale so he was blocking Ana’s view and he could eat more comfortably.

“You two were upstairs for a long time, what were you up to?” Mary asked before popping a quiche into her mouth.

“Um…”

“Uh, just checking on the boys, you know.” Crowley took a sip of his wine.

“Mmmhmmm.” Mary was given him a stern look making him squirm before she broke into laugher. “Oh goodness, you’re an easy one to wind up aren’t you?”

“What?” Crowley stared at her.

“Honestly, it’s been fun but I do feel a bit badly about it now.” She was laughing now, Newton snorting into his hand.

Crowley looked around the room confused.

“She’s been having you on darling, apparently this stern disapproval was all part of an act.”

Crowley sputtered.

Mary took a sip of her wine. “Well, to be fair, I did have concerns, which I think you can understand.” She ticked them off on her fingers as she spoke. “The power imbalance between employer and employee, the age difference, the fact that children are involved, moving in with one another very quickly, despite the sperate rooms. I understand that the moving in was sort of forced but still, concerning. The fact that Aziraphale has never been in a relationship before is also a big concern. Aziraphale keeping the fact that he had started a relationship in the first place also concerned me, it felt like he was hiding something.”

“Sorry Mum, I was just worried about, well, all the things you had just mentioned I suppose.”

Mary waved her hands. “Now that I’ve seen the two of you together for my own eyes, I do feel better about it. You are clearly gone on each other, it’s rather sweet. I can forgive you for the dirty sheets comment I suppose.”

Crowley let his head hit the back of the couch. “I’ll never live that one down.”

“What is it about dirty sheets?” Anathema asked.

“You don’t want to know.” Newton made a face.

“Oh? Oh!” Anathema looked at Aziraphale and Crowley. “Did you guys finally do it? I figured since you were living together and all it was only a matter of time.”

“None of your business Ana.” Crowley pointed at her.

“That man deflowered my brother!” Newt said, with mock indignation while pointing at Crowley.

“Newton!”

“Well I think that’s enough booze for your fawn.” Mary scolded with a smile.

“ ‘Deflowered’? Gross term for one thing and oh my god, you were a virgin?” Ana bounced in her seat.

Aziraphale hid his face in Crowley’s shoulder. “We are not having this conversation, especially not with my mother here.”

“Why not? Your mother seems super cool!”

“She’s a mum, mum’s aren’t cool.” Newton made a face.

“And she was a nun.” Aziraphale added, his voice muffled.

“ ‘Was’ being the important part Lamb.”

“Ok, I can handle making fun of Az’s sex life but I really, really don’t want any details on yours mum.” Newton scrunched up his nose.

Anathema looked at him and smiled softly, then back at Crowley. ‘adorable’ she mouthed.

“Maybe we should talk about your sex life Newt, even the playing field.” Crowley tried to coax Aziraphale away from his shoulder a bit.

“Oh, there’s nothing to tell there.” He waved his hand.

“So you were a nun huh?” Anathema broke in quickly, shooting Crowley a dirty look.

“Yes, for many years. My family was very religious and I suppose I felt like I had a calling, a longing to be part of something…bigger than myself. I thought that God and the Church was it but well, I became disillusioned quite quickly. When I finally left it was difficult, it was the only life I had known for so long, but I found my footing and eventually, social work within the foster care system and then I found my fawn and lamb and here we are.”

“I love the woodland nicknames for these two strapping grown men.” Anathema laughed. “Lamb I get, look at all those curls! But fawn?”

“Oh, every time Newton would get a growth spurt it all went to his legs and he’d be tripping over everything, as if he couldn’t control them! Just like a newborn deer so fawn just stuck.”

“Mum,” Newton groaned while Anathema clapped her hands and squealed.

“What about you dear? Care to share anything?”

Anathema shifted uncomfortably. “Oh, well, not much to tell. I grew up in Miami, my parents are disgustingly wealthy. We have very different opinions on how to live our lives so I don’t have much contact with them. Every now and then they’ll swoop in and offer me a staggering amount of money to go back home and live the life they want for me…but that’s not me. This is me. I’ve found my real home, and I’m making my own family.”

Mary nodded. “I understand. Well, you’re very brave and strong for living your life the way you want to, the way you need to.” She picked up her purse and dug in it for a moment before handing over a card to Anathema. “If you ever want to talk about leaving family behind or get more stories about my little Lamb and Fawn, feel free to call me.”

Anathema blushed but smiled gratefully at Mary while clutching the card tightly.

“I can’t believe you’ve been having me on.” Crowley muttered. “I was shitting bricks.”

Mary smiled. “I haven’t often had the chance to play the stern mother, it was rather fun.”

“Unbelievable.” Crowley muttered.

Aziraphale squeezed Crowley’s hand. “All in good fun darling. She had me worried as well until we were on our way to Tracey’s.”

“Who is a delight, by the way.” Mary added.

“Yes, she’s something alright.” Crowley grinned. “Love her, crazy thing that she is.”

Crowley and Anathema started sharing their increasingly funny stories about Tracey, everyone laughing and getting slightly tipsy. Newton remained the most sober, having to drive he and his mother back to his flat for the night. Finally they decided to wrap up the night, Mary having an early train to catch in the morning. She hugged a surprised Anathema and Crowley before giving Aziraphale a lingering hug and a kiss on his cheek before rushing out in the cool night air with Newton.

“Your mother is amazing!” Anathema was helping to clear up the living room.

“Yes, she really is.” Aziraphale sighed.

“Can’t believe she had me believing she was going to string me up.” Crowley muttered.

“That was fantastic!”

“Shut it.”

Aziraphale tutted. “Crowley, honestly.”

Anathema stuck her tongue out at Crowley behind Aziraphale’s back. “Well, I guess I should head out too.”

“Certainly not! You’ve had far too much to drink, it’s late, dark and cold out there and you are not riding your bicycle all the way into the village.” Aziraphale had his hand on his hips. “I’ll sleep down here and you can take my bed.”

“Angel, that’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever said. You can sleep with me.”

“Crowley, the boys-”

“The boys aren’t going to care once they realize that Ana had to sleep in your bed, it’s just like a sleepover. I’ll keep my hands to myself.”

“Doubt it.” Anathema snorted.

“Do you want to bike home?”

“I’ll be good! I’m tired.” Anathema pouted.

“Of course you are dear. Come on, let’s get you settled. I suppose you’re right Crowley but we are wearing pajamas and sleeping with the door open. Now be a dear and take Dog out for his wee won’t you? I’ll get Anathema settled.”

Twenty minutes later Crowley had his arms full of a warm Angel along with Ash who decide to sleep on his pillow tonight despite the scowling (Crowley) and giggling (Aziraphale) being directed at him.

“Glad your Mum doesn’t completely hate me,” Crowley kissed the riot of curls under his nose.

Aziraphale hummed. “As if anyone could hate you my dear.”

“Shut up.”

Aziraphale smiled. “I love you too darling. Now go to sleep.”

“Bossy Angel.”

“Sweet man. Go to sleep and dream about whatever it is you like best.”

“You then.” Crowley mumbled into the curls.

“Me then darling.”

Chapter 20

Summary:

Crowley and Aziraphale take the boys trick or treating for some family fluff before having their first "fight" as a couple

Notes:

CW for this chapter includes expectation of transphobia (misplaced) and mentions of biphobia. Also discussions of sex. There is no actual smut in this chapter.

“Hold still Lock while I finish drawing on your mustache. There we are!” Aziraphale straightened up and smiled. “Oh, very dashing and mysterious!”

Lock turned to look at himself in the mirror and smiled shyly. He was dressed in a magician’s outfit, complete with top hat and swirling cape. He had been nearly heartbroken that he couldn’t bring Floppy with him while they trick or treated but had been consoled when Aziraphale agreed to be his assistant. Aziraphale wore his own drawn on mustache, glittering bowtie, and flowing cape. Donning his top hat he grinned at the boy. “Should we do down and see if your father and Adam are ready?”

Lock nodded. “Can you take my picture with Floppy first please?”

“Of course!”

A few minutes later they headed down the stairs to where Crowley was helping Adam into his robot costume. It had taken some creative thinking on how exactly to make him into a zombie robot but they had managed it. His robot body that should have been silver had rusted out markings and busted wires and dials. His face was painted to look like a decaying zombie and he was trying to perfect his shambling gait. Adam decided Crowley was going to be a normal boring zombie compared to him. Crowley had pulled on his grubbiest work clothing and added some extra dirt on his face on top of his zombie makeup.

“Oh, look at you two terrifying ghouls!” Aziraphale cried.

“And you two handsome magicians.” Crowley smiled softly at the pair.

Aziraphale made a pleased sound and fluttered his eyelashes. “Let’s get some pictures of the two of you.”

“And Dog!” Adam said, pointing to Dog in his own zombie costume, a rather gruesome vest with fake ribs poking through the “rotting” flesh.

“And Ash too!” Lock said, pointing to where Ash was lounging on the new cat three that Crowley had ordered for him. “And Floppy!”

“Of course.” Aziraphale cradled the cat and straightened out the jolly roger bandana he wore around his neck while Crowley ran to retrieve the bunny.

The next few minutes were spent taking pictures in various poses and configurations, mostly of the boys but Crowley, with his long arm, managed to get a ‘family’ photo of all of them in their costumes before finally herding the group into Aziraphale’s car to head into town. They were meeting Pepper and Rose at the flower shop so they could trick or treat together in the village. Anathema always set up at the shop as her cottage was even further out from the village than Crowley’s and she never got many children there. Aziraphale was just as delighted with her display as the boys were.

“Look at all of this!” He exclaimed, motioning to the bubbling cauldron, cobwebs and purple lights strung up.

“This better all be cleared out by tomorrow morning.”

“You are such a scrooge.” Anathema adjusted her witches’ hat as she scolded Crowley before making them all stand together for a picture. “I had hoped you’d bring Ash so he could be my familiar but alas.”

“I suppose I could have put him in his backpack, he would have been happy enough.”

“Spoiled thing.”

“Can we go? Please??” Adam pulled on Crowley’s jacket.

“Yes, yes, we’re just waiting for Pepper, alright? Look, there she is now.”

Pepper and Rose were making their way towards them, Pepper dressed in a white lab coat with a clipboard and thick glasses, Rose as a scarecrow, straw sticking out of her coveralls and her hair, stitching drawn on her face.

“Hello loves, oh look at all of you! Adorable!”

“Hello Rose, hello Pepper, wonderful costumes.” Aziraphale gushed.

“Daaaaadddd.”

“Yes Adam, christ on a cracker. Everyone ready to go? Good? Let’s go.”

The trio of kids ran off ahead of them with Dog trotting along, his lead tied around Adam’s waist.

“Not too far!” Aziraphale cried. “Remember to say thank you!”

“Lost cause Angel.” Crowley caught his hand and and swung them as they walked. “Absolute chaos tonight.”

“Well you look at that!” Rose motioned to the men’s hands as she took Aziraphale’s free arm. “Warms the heart it does.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Crowley grumbled but smiled softly after he felt Aziraphale squeeze his hand a bit tighter.

 

“You know, before I met you all, I didn’t know that you could brush the teeth of a sleeping child.” Aziraphale was relaxed into Crowley’s arms on the sofa.

“Kids teach you all sorts of things.” He tipped the blond’s chin so he could kiss him, slipping his tongue inside his warm mouth as soon as the smooth lips parted. Aziraphale sighed into the kiss and went pliant, Crowley pulling him until he had the man in his lap, straddling him, the kiss becoming heated. They broke apart gasping before Crowley dove towards Aziraphale’s neck, kissing and biting all the skin he could reach.

“Crowley, ah! Darling, the boys are just upstairs.”

“Passed out in their beds.” Crowley hooked his fingers in the top buttons of Aziraphale’s shirt collar and popped them open. “Wish you had left that horrible bowtie on, I’d like to have taken it off of you myself.” He shifted his hips so he could rut against Aziraphale.

“Darling, we shouldn’t, with the boys, oh goodness.”

Crowley stopped and leaned back in the sofa. “Angel, are we not going to fuck anytime the kids are home?”

“Crowley!”

“You only kiss me when we’re alone.”

“The boys specifically said that they don’t want to see us kissing!”

“The only time you’ve slept in bed with me while the boys have been home was when Ana stayed the night and you set an alarm so you could be out of bed and down on the couch at 5am.”

“I didn’t want to confuse the boys, there had been so many changes.”

“The only time we’ve full on fucked since the first night was when the boys stayed at Pepper’s. Otherwise it’s been hand jobs at lunch time in my office a couple of times a week, not even here in the house!”

“I didn’t know you were so unsatisfied with our, our intimacies!” Aziraphale scrambled off Crowley’s lap and rebuttoned his shirt.

“Angel, you do realize that parents fuck with their kids in the house, right? How do you think they get more kids?”

“Unlikely to be the outcome in this situation.”

“Stop being a smart bastard.”

Aziraphale looked up sharply. “Are you actually angry right now?”

“I’m not angry Aziraphale, I’m frustrated and confused. When you moved in I thought-”

“I thought you asked me to move in here with you so I wouldn’t have to worry about that sleezy man,” Aziraphale stood up and crossed his arms. “Did you move me in here so we could have copious amounts of sex whenever you wanted?”

“What the actual fuck?” Crowley stood up and crossed his own arms. “That’s so fucking shitty. That’s not why I wanted you to move in here, I wanted to be able to keep you safe, you know that! Sorry if I just assumed after we went at it like teenagers that first night that you would want to keep it up.”

“It feels strange with the boys here. What if they woke up? What if they saw us?”

Crowley threw his arms up in the air. “That’s what locks are for Angel! Fuck! They’re my kids, why don’t you let me worry about them? You do realize that we are the adults in the house, right? We get to make the rules.”

“Don’t yell at me!”

“I’m not yelling at you, I’m, I’m raising my voice because this is stupid. You’re being stupid right now!”

Aziraphale gasped and turned on his heels. “Goodnight Crowley, I hope you’re a lot more pleasant in the morning!”

“We’re not finished talking about this.”

“Oh, is that what we’re doing,” Aziraphale hissed from the bottom of the stairs. “Talking? I rather thought you were loudly complaining that I’m not putting out enough for you.”

“Angel-”

Aziraphale stomped up the stairs but only got halfway before Crowley gently pulled on his arm. “Aziraphale stop and talk to me.”

“I don’t think so, not tonight.”

“Aziraphale…I shouldn’t have raised my voice, I’m sorry.”

Aziraphale hesitated before he let his body relax. “I’m sorry too. Can we talk more about this tomorrow? I just, I need to…gather my thoughts on why I’m hesitant.”

Crowley pulled Aziraphale into a hug. “I shouldn’t have pushed. Hard for me is all, now that I’ve gotten a taste of you, want you all the time. Shit of me.”

“I want you all the time too you know, you’re devilishly handsome.”

“You’re the pretty one.”

“We’re both pretty.”

Crowley kissed the blond curls softly. “Love you Angel.”

“I love you too. Now go to bed, the boys will be a nightmare in the morning.”

“Ugh. Alright. You’re not upset? We’re alright?”

“Yes Crowley, we’re alright.”

Crowley looked unsure but nodded, following Aziraphale up the stairs and kissing him gently outside his bedroom door.

Aziraphale went through the motions of getting ready for bed, feeling ill-at-ease about the whole thing. He climbed into bed and got cozy, trying to read before he gave up and texted Newton.

**Hey is it too late? Crowley and I had a fight, sort of? I mean
I think we’re alright but…**

Not long after pressing send the phone rang, surprising him. He put the phone on speaker before settling back in his pillows. “Hello?”

“Anathema and I had a fight too.”

“Oh? What about, are you alight?”

“You go first,” Newton sighed. “What happened?”

“Well, I’ll spare you all the details that might make you uncomfortable, but we were um, kissing, and Crowley wanted to do more and I said we shouldn’t because the kids were home and well, he brought up the fact that I’m not really open to doing anything…graphic when they’re here.”

“You don’t have sex when the boys are in the house?”

“I was trying not to say that Newton but yes, and he is apparently quite upset about it. I understand, I do, but things got heated and well…we’re alright, we kind of talked about it, but I asked if I could have some time before we sat down and had a real talk.”

“Wow, your first fight as a couple huh?”

“First fight ever. I hate it. I feel awful.”

“Well, you have a boundary and he pushed against it, you’re bound to feel crappy. Can I ask what’s the deal with it though? I assume you want do have sex still?”

Aziraphale snorted. “You have seen my boyfriend right?”

“Point taken.”

Aziraphale fiddled with the duvet. “I don’t know, it’s just, Crowley’s never done this, had someone special in his life around the boys, it’s a lot of change for them.”

“Yeah, I get it, we’re both sensitive when it comes to kids Az, we lived that constant change thing and it sucked.”

“You’re probably right, it’s probably my own stuff rather than really about the boys. It’s not fair on him.”

“You should talk to the boys. They talk about you guys all the time at school you know? None of it is bad.”

“Well that’s nice to hear. I’ll talk to Crowley tomorrow. Do you want to tell me what happened with you and Anathema now?”

Newton let out another long sigh. “I don’t know Az. She’s so hard to read, you know? I’ve been pretty chill about it, just sort of going with the flow of things but it kind of came to a head tonight. I helped her clean up her Halloween display on the curb outside the flower shop and she came over to mine for a drink, nothing special, just nice you know? We were talking and she had her hand on my arm and it just felt right so I leaned in for a kiss and she basically yelled ‘I’m trans!’ in my face.”

“Oh!”

“Yeah, so I said, alright, and? She got so mad at me! Like, angry I wasn’t upset or something? It was so strange, she demanded to know why I was so calm. I told her that her being trans wasn’t something anyone should be upset about, least of all me.”

“Obviously!”

“She started going on how straight cis men like me always freak out and sometimes say they can ‘handle’ it but can’t and it all ends in a mess.”

Aziraphale made a face. “You’re not straight.”

“Exactly! I told her that I wasn’t straight, that I was bi and she rolled her eyes!”

“Oh Newton.”

“So that made me get all riled up about that whole thing and she was riled up about the trans stuff. She left in a huff and I’ve been pacing around the flat for the last half an hour. What am I supposed to do with this? I really like her Az, and I don’t care if she’s trans! If she hasn’t had bottom surgery what do I care? I mean, I care in the sense that I care about her as a person but-”

“I understand what you’re trying to say Newton. Her body is a part of her and you like her, all of her.”

“Yeah, none of that matters to me, I really like her, all of her. I guess I’m also a bit stung that she rolled her eyes at me when I said I was bi. That was a bit shit of her.”

“Yes, I would agree with that. To play devil’s advocate I would say she’s probably had a lot of practice at being defensive in these situations and was perhaps a bit thrown off? It’s always a bit nerve wrecking to come out to someone, and I can’t even begin to imagine what it is like to tell someone that you are trans.”

“Maybe. Who knows? Not me because she never tells me what she’s thinking ever.” Newton grumbled.

“At least now you know why? Even if it’s misplaced in this instance?”

“Yeah. Just sucks you know? I really like her Az, thought I could see us as something but if she’s not willing to give us a chance even…”

“She, much like myself tonight, probably just needs to unpack everything and think it over. For all we know she’s speaking to Crowley right now about it.”

“Heh, yeah, she might be. And then he’d be talking about you and we’re all just a big bunch of idiots who can’t talk to one another.”

“Normally I would correct you but I feel a bit like an idiot tonight.” Aziraphale sighed.

“Nah, you guys will be fine. You love one another, you just need to talk to him about it. He looks at you as if you were a wonder, you’ll figure it out.”

“I do hope you’re right. I love him Newton, I really do. I believe that you and Anathema will come to an understanding as well.”

“I’m not so certain of that one.”

“I really do. I’ve seen the way she looks at you, it’s so very soft. I think maybe she just got scared tonight, a bit of ‘I’ll reject him before he can reject me’ which wasn’t needed but it’s hard to put the horse back in the barn.”

“I’m going to give it a bit, I don’t want to irk her or anything. Even if this is it, if she doesn’t want to go any further…I’d still like to be her friend.”

“Aw, you’re such a sweetheart Newton.”

“Yeah, alright. I’m going to go, got a bunch of tired sugar crashed kids to try to teach tomorrow morning.”

“Yes, good luck with that! Call me or text me if you need anything, just to vent or whatnot.”

“Same goes for you. G’night Az.

“Good night Newton.” Aziraphale plugged in his phone and laid back, looking up at the ceiling before he huffed and climbed out of bed. He opened his door to a disgruntled looking Ash. “Oh, sorry darling. Come on now.” He scooped him up and placed him on his shoulder as he made his way down the hallway. He peaked in on the boys who were both sleeping soundly before knocking gently on Crowley’s mostly closed bedroom door before pushing it open.

“Angel!” Crowley had sat up in bed quickly dropping his phone. He was shirtless and his hair was messy as if he’d been laying down.

“I haven’t woken you or anything have I?” Aziraphale edged into the bedroom.

“No, no of course not.”

They looked at one another for a bit before Aziraphale stepped closer. “Is there room in the bed for us?”

Crowley visibly relaxed before smiling softly. “Always Angel.” He pulled back the covers.

Aziraphale returned his smile before setting Ash down (who promptly made his way to Crowley’s pillow while Crowley glared) and climbed in beside his boyfriend, wiggling until his back was firm against his chest.

Crowley sighed and pulled Aziraphale closer somehow, squeezing him tight. “Do you want me to set an earlier alarm so you can go back to your own bed?”

“No, the usual will be fine. I’m sure we’ll have to drag them out of bed tomorrow.”

“I’m sorry about getting upset earlier.” Crowley mumbled.

“I know, I am too. I spoke to Newton just now. He made me realize some things. I think maybe I’m projecting my own stuff on them a bit? Change was always so scary when I was a child, it was so often and abrupt until I made it to Mary’s. I guess I was trying to protect them from some of that.”

“Aw Angel, it does all sorts of gooey things to this cold heart of mine to know that you love my kids so much and you want to protect them. They aren’t going to even really notice that you’re in here. They’ll make one comment and then that’s it.”

“You’re probably right. I’m also horrified at the idea of them hearing us.”

“You more like,” Crowley snorted.

“Crowley! That’s not helping!”

Crowley cackled. “I know, couldn’t resist! Look, the walls are thick, the door is heavy with a good lock…they won’t hear us. We’ll have rules too! Door has to be closed and locked, after we’re finished and we’ve cuddled we need to get cleaned up and dressed and the lube and whatnot need to be put away so when we open the door again it’s all PG in here. It will be fine, but I want you to be comfortable too Angel. If it freaks you out then we can just keep on like we’re doing.”

“Hmm. Well, I’m not against it, believe me.” Aziraphale yawned. “Maybe tomorrow night we can just see how things go?”

“Whatever you need Angel.” He kissed Aziraphale’s cheek.

“This is your relationship as well Crowley, I can’t be the one calling all the shots.”

“You’re not, but you’re the one setting the pace and sometimes I forget it. I don’t want to go too fast for you, for us.”

Aziraphale linked their hands together, enjoying the way the long fingers curved around his shorter fingers, the way they looked. He brought them up to his mouth and kissed a bony knuckle before sighing again.

“Go to sleep Angel. I’ll hold you while you fall asleep.”

Aziraphale drifted off in a warm embrace surrounded by Crowley’s scent, the sound of Ash’s purrs in his ears. It was everything.

Chapter 21

Summary:

Newton and Anathema talk and find a common ground.
Crowley and Aziraphale enjoy some domestic bliss

Notes:

Hello friends. This chapter is mostly fluff and smut but there is some mention of biphobia, transphobia and deadnaming. It is all brief and everything is worked out in the end but if that's something that might trigger you then please skip down to "Wine Angel?" and you'll be good. Please take care of yourselves.

“I need to talk to you.”

“Good morning to you too Ana.” Crowley pushed open the door to his office in the back of the shop that Ana had been leaning against.

“Good morning. I need to talk to you.”

Crowley set down his travel mug on his desk along with the lunch that Aziraphale had packed for him and smiled softly. He had been nearly sick with worry when they had parted the night before after their, well, not a fight but it had been something that churned his stomach. When Aziraphale had crawled into bed with him afterwards he wondered if it was possible for a person to float away with happiness. They had slept the whole night through until the alarm buzzed them both awake and they had to go about the morning routines of showers and bathroom breaks for Dog, dragging the kids out of bed (“Adam, I don’t care if the candy is fruit flavoured, you can not have it for breakfast!”). He and Aziraphale had had a lovely chaotic morning together. There had been small domestic touches, hands on lower backs as they passed one another, a quick kiss on the cheek, soft smiles…

“Have you heard a single word I’ve said?”

“Uh…”

“Useless! You’re absolutely useless.” Anathema flopped down in a chair and crossed her arms.

“Sorry, sorry. Had a bit of a night last night. What’s up?” Crowley sprawled in his own chair.

“Well I’m sure you know all about it.”

“Uh, no?”

“Really? I assumed Newt would have called Az and Az would have told you.”

“He mentioned he’d been speaking with Newt but about our shit. We had a,” he twirled his hand in the air, “something last night. It’s fine now, but it sucked. What happened between you and the lizard?”

Anathema hid her face in her hands. “He tried to kiss me.”

“Alright? Isn’t that what you wanted? You’ve been making moon eyes at him since he moved into town.”

“I told him I was trans.”

Crowley went very still. “You hadn’t already told him? Did he say something Anathema? Something shitty to you? Do I need to go to the school?”

“No! No, that’s the problem, he didn’t say anything.”

Crowley relaxed again. “As if he was so in shock he didn’t say anything or it’s no big deal so he didn’t say anything?”

“The second one.”

“Ana, you’re killing me here. What the hell is the problem then? You wanted him to be a transphobic dick?”

“No, of course not, but he was just so…nonchalant about it! As if it’s no big deal.”

“It really isn’t, you’re just a person.”

“Straight guys always make a big deal out of it.”

“Well, congratulations, you got yourself an educated straight white guy who isn’t a complete arse. That’s a rare find.” Crowley grinned.

“Well, get this, I tell him I’m trans and he goes ‘ok’ and I sort of freak out about that and then he said how he likes the person I am, and body parts don’t really matter, especially since he’s bi.”

Crowley raised an eyebrow. “That’s lucky then.”

“Is he though? Does he seem like it to you?”

“Ana, are you being a dick now?” He leaned forward on the desk. “If he says he’s bi, he’s bi. He doesn’t need to have sex with a guy and a girl in front of you to prove it, does he?”

Ana’s cheeks went dark. “No, of course not! I just thought he’d advertise it a bit more. I had no idea!”

“The guy just moved to a new village to teach little children. He doesn’t know what the parents are like, how open the school is, how safe it is. You don’t go around with a sign that says “Hey I’m Trans!” I don’t walk around yelling “I’m gay and I love cock!” It’s just not done Ana.”

“Ugh Crowley I’ve made such a mess of things!”

“Well, if I’ve learned anything from Aziraphale it’s that you need to talk to Newton. Tell him all of this. Tell him that you’ve had guys say crappy things to you or that you’ve felt unsafe and your back was up, that you panicked a bit. Tell him that your family still deadnames you every chance they get and you basically have no relationship with them. Tell him you’re sorry and that you want to shag him senseless.”

Ana let out a watery laugh as she wiped at her eyes.

“Well, maybe save that last part.”

“Alright, I’ll talk to him, today. I really, really like him Crowley.”

“Yeah, hasn’t been obvious at all.”

Anathema rolled her eyes. “As if you weren’t making heart eyes at Az from the moment you saw him. You bought him a car for crying out loud.”

“Shut up.”

 

Newton watched the last of his students go off with their mother and sighed in relief. It had been a long day; most of the students were tired from being up late the night before and they all had candy with their lunches. He had read a soothing story that afternoon and more than one of them nodded off on the story time carpet. When Aziraphale had shown up for the twins they had a quick hushed conversation before Aziraphale led the irritable boys to his shiny blue car and took them off towards home.

“Hey!”

Newton jumped and looked around before seeing Anathema on the other side of the fence, twisting the lace of her sleeve between her fingers. He swallowed thickly before heading her way. “Hi.”

“Um, hi.”

“Did you-”

“Can we-”

Newton smiled. “You first.”

“Uh, thanks. Um, do you think maybe we can go somewhere and talk?”

Newton nodded. “Meet me at my flat in half an hour? I have to tidy up my classroom and set out some things for tomorrow’s lessons.”

“Oh, yeah of course! It can be later-”

Newton reached over the fence and gently stilled Anathema’s fingers. “You’re going to rip this, it’s too delicate for that kind of a workout. Half an hour, alright?”

“Yes, yes, thank you.”

“Alright, I best get in there.”

Anathema nodded. “Alright,” she took ahold of her bike that had been leaning on the fence and started to push it slowly down the sidewalk towards the flat. “I’ll see you soon.”

Newton watched her go for a minute before hurrying back to his classroom. His hands were trembling a bit as he organized the finger paintings that had been left out to dry. They kept trembling as he wiped down the white boards and organized his markers. When he couldn’t wait any longer he grabbed his messenger bag and slung it over his shoulder before hurrying out of the school, nodding to the other teachers he met. When he reached the backstairs to his flat he couldn’t help but smile. Anathema was sitting on them, her bike propped up against the building’s wall. She had a sketch book open on her knees.

She startled. “Oh! You were quick.”

“Yeah, I uh, wanted to get here.” He dug for his keys in his bag while Anathema climbed to her feet, sketch book stuffed into her own oversized bag. “There they are! Alright, come up?” She nodded and followed him up the stairs and waited patiently while he struggled with the old lock. Once inside he left his bag by the door and looked around. “Um, can I get you anything? Tea?”

“I am so sorry Newton, I’m so sorry. I acted badly last night, and I rolled my eyes at you when you mentioned your bisexuality and that was so shitty of me. The last thing I would ever want to do is to hurt you or push you away and I did both.”

“I wasn’t actually expecting to get here so quickly.” Newton mused. He motioned to the sofa and they both sat down. “Look, Anathema, I’m not mad at you. I’m not going to lie to you, it did feel pretty awful, the things you said last night, but I think I can understand why you said them, at least to an extent.”

“It’s difficult enough finding someone decent enough to date and finding someone who’s ok with this,” she motioned to herself, “it’s not easy. I’ve had a few scary moments, but mostly disappointing.”

“Anathema, to hell with anyone who ever made you feel like less of a person than you are. You’re amazing! You’re pretty and smart and funny and I have so much fun whenever I’m with you. Well, not last night but I’m hoping that was a one off.”

Anathema nodded quickly. “It was, I promise! I really really want to see where this goes Newt, I feel like there’s something here.”

Newton smiled softly. “I feel that as well.”

“And you’re really not bothered by the whole trans thing? I haven’t had bottom surgery but I got to pick these out.” She motioned to her chest.

Newton blushed but smiled. “Not bothered. That’s something that we can navigate when we get there.”

“I would really, really like to be kissed by you right now.”

“I really, really want to kiss you.” Newton leaned in and cupped Anathema’s cheek and kissed her softly.

Anathema sighed into the kiss then broke it and moved closer to Newton so she was leaning on his chest. He brought his arm around her and squeezed her tight. “This feels right.” She said softly.

“Extremely.”

 

 

“Wine Angel?”

Aziraphale took the offered glass and gulped down half of it. It had been a difficult afternoon with the boys. They had both been tired and irritable when he had picked them up from school, Lock falling asleep on the brief car ride home. He had to limit the access to their treats as Adam seemed determined to eat it all in one sitting. He finally decided on an early dinner and was already bathing the boys when Crowley came home, a bit later than usual due to a project he had been working on. He had knelt on the bathroom floor and started scrubbing shampoo into Adam’s curls while Aziraphale did the same to Lock. They had struggled the boys into the pajamas and got their teeth brushed, despite all the protests. Crowley had tried to send Aziraphale downstairs for a break but Lock had burst into tears and demanded the Nanny lay in bed with him while Crowley read bedtime stories. So Crowley had sat on the floor, his back against Adam’s bed while Aziraphale laid in the small bed with Lock, rubbing the small boys back in soothing circles until his eyes began to flutter closed.

Crowley snorted at Aziraphale while he took his meal out of the microwave.

“Oh dear. I love the boys, I really do. However today has felt like a thousand hours long and it’s only just gone seven!”

“Aw Angel you should have called me I would have come home sooner.”

“Oh no, it was fine, it’s my job Crowley, and you were busy! There were just a lot of strong feelings today, most of them tending towards the cranky end of the scale.” He took a smaller sip of his wine this time.

Crowley pushed his plate away. “Why don’t you go have a nice long shower or a bath and I’ll clean up down here, get things squared away. Put on your silly pajamas and crawl into bed with a book. We can have a cuddle.”

“Oh that does sound rather lovely. You spoil me.”

“Not nearly enough. As your mother pointed out I’ve never brought you home any flowers and I grow the bastards.”

“You do however pay me exceedingly well and you bought me a car Crowley.”

“Did you tell her that?”

Aziraphale clutched his imaginary pearls. “Of course not, can you imagine!”

Crowley chuckled as Aziraphale downed the rest of his wine and then refilled the glass. “I’ll make this one last.”

“Go on before I put you on dish duty.”

 

Half an hour later Crowley found Aziraphale under the blankets of their big bed, propped up on pillows with a book in his lap, his curls damp. “Hello love,” he leaned in for a kiss, tasting the wine on his lips.

“Hello to you.” He closed the book and set it aside. “Come for our cuddle?”

Crowley pulled his shirt off and dropped it on the floor, grinning at the ‘tsk’ he received from Aziraphale. As he started to undo his belt buckle Aziraphale cleared his throat.

“Maybe lock the door? Just incase?”

Crowley’s hands stilled. “Angel, we don’t have to do anything tonight.”

“I know that Crowley, that’s why I said ‘incase’. Better to be safe, is it not?” He fluttered his eyelashes.

Crowley nodded and sauntered to the door. He closed it firmly then eyed Aziraphale as he slowly turned the lock. He then made his way to the bathroom and grabbed a towel which he dropped on the end of the bed before crawling towards Aziraphale.

Aziraphale was tracking his every movement but couldn’t help but gasp out a surprised laugh when Crowley dove onto the bed and playfully pined his shoulders down.

“Hi,” Crowley grinned before mouthing at Aziraphale’s throat.

“Hello Cr-oh god, keep doing that.”

Crowley snickered but bit down again on the sensitive skin.

Aziraphale buried his hands in Crowley’s hair and gave it a tug, electing a growl from the older man.

“Mmmm want you Angel.”

Aziraphale bit his lip. “I want you too, but…”

“Do you trust me Angel?” Crowley nosed at the other side of his throat before leaving a matching mark.

“Ah! Yes darling, yes.”

Crowley grinned. “Get up love, get those terrible pajamas off.”

“They’re not terrible!”

“They’re tartan.”

“Tartan is stylish!”

Crowley shook his head. “Remind me again, how exactly did I fall for you?”

“Something about my bottom being one in the top ten bottom’s in the Universe I believe?” Aziraphale unbuttoned his shirt before dropping it on the floor along with his pajama bottoms.

“Ah yes, I remember now.” Crowley had pulled back the duvet and was spreading the towel over the bed. “Oh naughty boy, you’re not wearing any pants.”

Aziraphale blushed. “I was in pajamas!”

“Get into bed love.” Crowley turned off the lights and stripped off the rest of his clothes before climbing into bed getting his arms around Aziraphale. They kissed for a few minutes before Crowley pulled away. “This still ok?”

“Yes,” Aziraphale sighed.

“You let me know if it isn’t.”

Aziraphale smiled sweetly. “Of course.”

They were soon rutting against one another, gasping into one another’s mouths.

“Angel,” Crowley groaned, “roll on your other side, yeah?”

Aziraphale shivered and quickly rolled over. He heard the familiar sound of a bottle of lube being opened and trembled again.

“Lift your leg, there you are.”

Aziraphale gasped when he felt cold lube being slathered on his thighs. “Crowley, what?”

“Shhh, I’ll make us both feel good. Close your legs, yes like that.” Crowley nudged his straining cock between the closed legs and began to slowly thrust.

“Oh! Oh, that feels…” Aziraphale trailed off with a gasp.

“Fuck, fuck these thighs,” Crowley panted into Aziraphale’s neck. He let his hands roam the soft body in his arms and settled on the pair of rosy nipples that he soon had worked into hard peaks, all while thrusting.

“Crowley, Crowley please touch me!”

“I am touching you,” He tweaked one nipple then the other.

Aziraphale buried his face into the pillow to muffle a cry as his body jerked, and cried again when Crowley’s slick hand grasped him and began moving at the same time as his thrusts.

“Yessssss,” Crowley hissed. “So good, you’re so good Angel. Feel so good. So good for me.”

Aziraphale half sobbed into the pillow before he fell apart, coming in thick ropes up his stomach and chest.

“Shit, shit!” Crowley hissed thrusting faster before he shuddered and gasped, adding his own mess to Aziraphale’s trembling body. When he came back to himself he was breathing hard, his spent cock slipping out from between Aziraphale’s legs. He slowly gathered himself and stumbled off the bed and was soon back with a warm cloth. He leaned over the still panting Aziraphale who still had his eyes closed and kissed him softly on his sweaty forehead.

Aziraphale’s eyes fluttered open and they shared dopey love drunk smiles before Crowley gently cleaned up the mess they had made together and helped Aziraphale back into his pajamas. He slipped back into his briefs and unlocked the bedroom door before carefully shuffling down the hallway and peaking in on the kids. Both boys were sleeping soundly, dog snoring softly at Adam’s feet. Satisfied he made his way back to his bedroom where Aziraphale was relaxing back on the pillows, a purring Ash in his arms.

“Where did he come from?”

“He slipped in when you opened the door.”

“Lucky I didn’t step on the sneaky thing.” Crowley yawned and crawled into bed.

Aziraphale gave Ash a kiss before setting him down and settling into the bed, Crowley’s arm slung around him.

“Mmm love having you in my bed. That was fantastic Angel.”

“Yes, and the boys?”

“Sound asleep, none the wiser that I shagged you silly.”

Aziraphale slapped Crowley’s arm. “Crowley!”

Crowley snorted before kissing Aziraphale’s cheek. “All is well love.” He squeezed him tight before settling down in the bed sighing.

“It really is, isn’t it?” Aziraphale whispered.

The only response he got was Ash purring beside him and Crowley softly snoring in his ear. Aziraphale sighed happily and put an arm gently around Ash and closing his own heavy eyes.

Chapter 22

Summary:

A regular Wednesday morning goes off the rails and leads to a plan to rid the village of their most annoying resident.

Notes:

There are mentions of blood and an injury requiring stitches in this chapter. I don't go into any gory details but blood is mentioned several times, so if that is a trigger for you, you can skip the first few paragraphs and continue on with the story.

We're nearing the end friends, I don't have everything written yet, so I'm guessing there are maybe four chapters left? We're getting there!

Thank you for reading and as always, stay safe.

Aziraphale sat in the waiting room of the clinic holding his bleeding hand. It hurt an unbelievable amount and he was trying very hard not to call Crowley to come and distract him or hold his other hand.

 

It had been a normal morning. He had gotten the boys off to school and Crowley off to work with no issues. He ran to the shops and decided to take Dog and Ash on a walk along the beach. It had been cold but the sun was bright and he wanted to soak up as much of it as possible before winter took it’s hold. Ash ended up cuddled in his coat purring against Aziraphale’s warm chest for most of the walk while Dog barked and chased disgruntled gulls. Aziraphale’s pockets held a few pieces of broken pottery and smooth glass that Crowley would roll his eyes over, but Lock would love.

 

Once they were back home and warmed, he puttered around the house tidying up things as he wandered before washing the wine glasses from the night before. He was thinking about what the wine had led to when the glass somehow shattered while his hand was inside it, a jagged edge slicing into his palm and turning the bubbly water pink. Aziraphale had thought about panicking for a moment before wrapping his hand in a tea towel and heading for his car. The amount of blood that was already soaking through the towel was concerning, the drive into the village a bit harrowing but he had managed it alright. Now he was waiting for his name to be called as he held his hand above his head trying to ignore the streaks that had run down his arm and stained his shirt, his pants, oh the car!

 

“Looks like you’ve run into a bit of trouble.”

 

Aziraphale let his head thump into the wall behind him. “I really am not in the mood for an interaction with you at the moment Mr. Fann.”

 

“You know, it’s shocking what nastiness can come out of that sweet mouth of yours.”

 

Aziraphale looked at the man in disgust as he leered in the seat beside him in the otherwise empty waiting room.

 

“Mr. Fell? Come through won’t you?” The nurse at the desk pointed down the hall. “Can you get to room three alright on your own?”

 

“Yes, thank you.” He stood up without sparing a look for Sandy Fann and made his way quickly to his room.

 

“Aziraphale, I’m surprised to see you here, what happened?”

 

“Uriel? You’re a doctor?”

 

Uriel nodded her head as she closed the door and looked at his chart.

 

“How did I not know this?”

 

“Well, the Crowley’s have been remarkably healthy these past few months and looking at your chart here, I see that you’ve only come in for blood work since moving to the village.”

 

Aziraphale coloured at the memory. “Still, you or Rose never mentioned.”

 

“I assumed you knew, small village and all. Now, what happened?” Uriel put the chart down and reached for a pair of gloves.

 

“Oh, it was so strange! I was washing a wine glass and it just shattered in my hands and well, here I am.”

 

“Ouch, let’s take a look.” She unwrapped the tea towel and maneuvered the bloodied hand. “That’s a deep cut, but it looks like most of the bleeding has stopped. I don’t believe there’s any shards in there, but let’s get it nice and clean. You will need to be sutured for sure.”

 

“Oh dear,” Aziraphale closed his eyes.

 

“Feeling faint?”

 

“No, I just don’t care to look.”

 

“Keep your eyes closed if you like and I’ll start cleaning this up so I can see just how bad it is. Then I’ll give you a numbing shot and start with the sutures. I suspect you will need at least five.”

 

Aziraphale grimaced and kept his eyes closed as Uriel efficiently cleaned and then neatly stitched the wound.

 

“All finished Aziraphale.”

 

He opened his eyes and cautiously viewed his right palm, ugly wound closed with neat stitches.

 

“It took seven to close,” Uriel thew her gloves in the trashcan and handed him a pamphlet. “Wound care. Try not to get it wet for 48 hours, after that you can wash your hands and shower as usual but no soaking. Watch for signs of infection, you’re gong to be quite tender. Come back in a week and I’ll see if we can remove them.”

 

“Thank you Uriel. Looks quite frightful doesn’t it? Not that you didn’t do a wonderful job!”

 

Uriel smiled. “It will start to look better in a few days. Just be cautious.”

 

“Crowley will have me wrapped in bubble wrap.” Aziraphale sighed as he got to his feet. “Oh, I do hope that horrible man isn’t still out there.”

 

Uriel narrowed her eyes. “Who?”

 

“Ugh, Sandy Fann.”

 

“Did he say anything to you?”

 

“Thankfully my name was called right after he sat beside me. He did manage to make one remark about my ‘pretty mouth’ that will haunt me for the rest of my days.”

 

Uriel grimaced. “I’ll walk you out. Did you drive here on your own?”

 

Aziraphale blushed. “I did, it was rather silly of me. I’ll see if I can get someone to drive the car back home for me, is it alright here in the lot?”

 

“Of course, don’t worry about that. You should get Crowley to take you home now. Can you get to the flower shop on your own?”

 

“I can.” He looked down at himself and frowned. “Hopefully no one phones the police on me, I look like I’ve done someone in.”

 

That earned a rare chuckle from Uriel. “As if you could.” She opened the door and ushered him out. “You should have juice or a cookie or something, get your blood sugar up.” Once they reached the waiting room she kept them walking past Sandy who looked like he was about to say something until they were on the sidewalk. “There we are Aziraphale, don’t hesitate to come back if there are any problems.”

 

Aziraphale smiled. “Thank you for that. I’ll see you soon.” He gingerly removed his phone from his pocket and saw several mixed text messages from Crowley. “Oh dear.” He hit the call button and started to walk slowly towards the flower shop.

 

“Angel! I’ve been texting you for 45 minutes, did you have a nap in the sun with Ash or something?”

 

“Um, no. Are you at the shop?”

 

“Yes, why?”

 

“I’m on my way there right now. I want you to promise me something.”

 

“Alright.”

 

“I want you to promise me that you won’t freak out when you see me.”

 

“What happened? Are you alright? I’m coming to get you, pull the car over!”

 

“Crowley, honestly! Breath darling.” Aziraphale closed his own eyes and leaned against the building he was passing for a short rest. “I’m fine. I’m just coming from the health clinic. Why didn’t you tell me that Uriel was a doctor?”

 

“The clinic? What’s wrong, are you sick? Did you get hurt?”

 

“I hope you weren’t overly attached to your wine glasses because you are down one now. Oh dear, there’s probably a bit of a crime scene at the house now that I’m thinking of it. At least the glass is all in the sink so the animals can’t get to it.” He opened his eyes and kept walking, nearing the shop.

 

“You cut yourself bad enough to need to go to the clinic? Whey didn’t you call me?”

 

“Well, that would have probably been the most prudent thing to do, especially since the car also has blood all over it. I’m afraid I’m in a terrible mess but I’m all sewn up now and I’m fine.”

 

“Angel, christ. I’m coming to get you.”

 

“Crowley, I’m walking up on the shop now. I’m hanging up dear.”

 

“Angel-”

 

Aziraphale shoved his phone back into his pocket and shuffled his way towards the shop. He was about to push the door in when it was ripped open and a near frantic Crowley was pulling him inside.

 

“What happened? My god, you’re covered in blood! Let me see Angel? Fuck, are you alright?”

 

“Ow Crowley, don’t grab me so.”

 

“Shit, sorry!”

 

“I’m fine. I had a very silly little accident and cut my hand. I thought I could get myself to the clinic without incident and I could, but not without some mess. Uriel, who I had no idea was the town’s doctor by the by, cleaned it and used seven-”

 

“Seven?!?”

 

“Seven stiches to close it up. I’m rather sore and not to worry you more but I’m a tad bit dizzy.”

 

“Stop grilling him and get him a chair you idiot.” Bea shouted.

 

“Fuck, yes a chair.” He pulled Aziraphale behind the counter and sat him on a stool. “I’ll get you some water.” Crowley scurried off.

 

“He’s useless when it comes to this sort of thing.” Bea handed Aziraphale a Kit Kat bar. “Let me see?”

 

“Oh thank you,” he held up his hand for Bea to inspect while trying to open the Kit Kat with his teeth and left hand.

 

“You’re a bit on the useless side right now too.” They took the bar from him and opened it, handing it back. “Gnarly looking cut.”

 

“Yes, quite.” He sighed taking a bite.

 

“Here, here drink some water.” Crowley handed him a bottle with the cap unscrewed.

 

“Thank you darling, I’m alright honestly. I feel silly more than anything else. You’re so busy right now, and I’m going to be selfish and ask you to drive me home and oh goodness what time is it? The boys will need to be picked up and someone is going to need to drive my car back to the house and I hate to think of what it even looks like inside, I mean look at the state of me! I’ll never get these stains out!”

 

“Angel, shhhh.”  

 

Aziraphale took a gulp of his water. “Oh dear.”

 

“I’ll pick the monsters up, you take Blondie home. Give me your keys and Dana and I will get your car to you.”

 

Arrangements made, Crowley ushered Aziraphale outside and into the sleek black car and rushed him back home.

 

Crowley had fussed over the injured hand to a ridiculous degree. He helped Aziraphale into a clean pair of pajamas and settled him on the couch in the lounge with cold water, a cup of cocoa, plate of cookies and three warm furry friends not to count the fuzzy blankets he was wrapped in, all while he took care of the aftermath of the accident. When the boys were dropped off after school by Bea they fussed and fawned over Aziraphale just as much if not more, adding more blankets and pillows to the couch and carefully cuddling in close while a quiet movie was playing on the television. Crowley ordered in and insisted on feeding a blushing Aziraphale.

 

The boys went to bed extremely easily for a change, though the adults didn’t expect that to extend to the next night. They were cuddled up on the sofa, Crowley holding Aziraphale tight with one arm and cradling his injured hand with the other. It was half past eight and Aziraphale was seriously considering following the boys to bed when a knock interrupted the quiet evening.

 

“Who the hell is that?” Crowley grumbled. Before he could detangle himself the door was unlocked and flung open.

 

“Kids asleep?” Bea kicked their boots off and stomped into the house followed by Dana.

 

“Feel free to just come into my house with your emergency key.” Crowley grumbled.

 

”Thanks.” They flopped down on the love seat.

 

“Hey babe, heard you had a bit of a shit day huh? Brought your car back.” Dana dropped the keys on the coffee table and sat down next to Bea.

 

“Oh thank you, I really appreciate it.”

 

“What’s up?” Crowley settled back down on the sofa.

 

“Just waiting for the others.”

 

“The others?” Aziraphale asked, pulling the blanket closer around himself.

 

“Yeah, everyone.” Dana shrugged.

 

“Why the fuck is everyone coming over to our house at 8:30 on a Wednesday?”

 

“Because,” Bea smiled wide, unnerving the men, “we’re going to decide how we can fuck over Sandy Fann.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 23

Summary:

It's time to start some serious plotting and the whole gang get in on it

Crowley and Aziraphale had looked understandably stunned by Bea’s declaration. “Not that I’m not thrilled with the idea of fucking that guy over, but why now?” Crowley questioned.

Bea exchanged a look with Aziraphale. He stared back for a moment before understanding dawned on him. How on earth had they heard about the short exchange at the clinic? He cleared his throat. “If you’ll all excuse me I’ll go put on something that aren’t my pajamas, I feel underdressed if ‘everyone’ will be over soon.”

“Aw, but you’re so adorable in ‘em!” Dana teased.

Aziraphale blushed to the roots of his hair and untangled his body from Crowley’s.

“I’ll help you.” Crowley stood and followed behind.

“Be quick with the fucking, you got company coming!” Bea called after them.

“Bea!”

“Shut it you monster, the boys are sleeping!” Crowley growled.

They climbed the stars, looking in on the boys before heading to the master bedroom. Aziraphale had all but moved into the room with Crowley at this point. He had feared what the boys would think, finding them in bed together, but they hadn’t even commented on it! The first Saturday Aziraphale didn’t stumble back to his own bed the twins had merely jumped on the bed and instigated a free for all wrestling match that ended with giggles and cuddling. After the boys had run downstairs, Dog yipping at their heels, Crowley had raised an eyebrow at Aziraphale who sighed and rolled his eyes.

“I can’t believe the whole gang is on their way, seems a bit extreme.” Aziraphale sighed, going towards his wardrobe.

“Sit, you!” Crowley pointed towards the bed before pulling out some clothes for Aziraphale.

“Crowley, I can use my left hand to open drawers.” He looked at the redhead fondly.

“You can but you won’t.” Crowley grinned before laying down his selection on the bed, a pair of soft trousers and a dark blue Henley Crowley had bought him. With many kisses and giggles, Crowley got Aziraphale stripped off and then dressed again.

“Oh Angel,” Crowley purred. “Look at you.”

Aziraphale smiled coyly. “It’s just a Henley darling.”

“It’s not the shirt, it’s the man wearing it.” Crowley cupped his cheek and leaned in for a soft kiss.

Aziraphale sighed into the kiss as Crowley brought his arms around him and squeezed tightly.

Crowley broke the kiss and rested their foreheads together. “Hi.”

Aziraphale smiled up at him. “Hi.”

Crowley groaned and pulled away. “We better get down there before Bea accuses us of all sorts of things.” He took Aziraphale’s uninjured hand and led him down the stairs.

“Oh Love, let me see!” Rose met them at the bottom of the stairs, hands held out.

“Hello Rose! What are you doing here?” Aziraphale showed her his sore palm.

Rose gasped. “Love, come over here and look at this! It looks so sore! Are you sure it’s alright? Are you sure it’s not infected? Shouldn’t it be wrapped up or something?”

Urial joined them. “It looks fine Rose, it’s a new wound and it needs to heal. How are you Aziraphale? Crowley?”

“I’m alright, bit surprised by all the visitors.” The rest of the group had arrived while the couple were upstairs. Chairs from the dining room had been dragged in, the coffee table covered in pizza boxes and cans of beer. Hastur and Ligur were sitting on two of the chairs, munching on pizza, Anathema was sitting in the armchair with Newton perched on the arm. Tracey was sitting on the sofa, a gift bag on her lap.

“Come on over duck, let me see your poor paw.” Tracey cooed. “Mr. S would have come but Eric has the night off and he’s short staffed, poor old bear.”

“This is hardly necessary.”

“We brought eggs!” Rose said, walking Aziraphale over towards the sofa. “They’re in the kitchen. The girls have been busy lately.”

“Got your car cleaned too, was a bit of a horror show in there.” Dana added.

Bewildered, Aziraphale sat sandwiched between Crowley and Tracey.

“Aw, poor duck, must have hurt like anything!” She passed the gift bag she was holding to him. “This is for the both of you really, I’ve got a feeling that our Crowley will be taking extra care of you these next few days.”

“Oh Tracey, you shouldn’t have, it’s really-Tracey!” Aziraphale slammed the bag closed and shoved it behind his back.

The group broke out in laughter. “Ooo, I’m very interested to know what’s in there.” Crowley joked.

“Not appropriate for this setting!”

“I’d rather not see what sort of sex toys you guys have in rotation.” Newton said, with a blush.

Anathema laughed. “We brought a gift too, not as exciting as whatever Tracey brought!” She passed a gift bag to Crowley who helped Aziraphale open it.

“Oh very funny Anathema.” Aziraphale removed a plastic wine glass.

“It’s a set of two, you guys should be safe now.”

“Very good, thank you.”

Crowley reached for a slice of pizza and offered a bite to Aziraphale who shook his head, before stuffing half of it in his mouth. “Alright, now, can you lot tell me what’s happening? Why are we having the Let’s Fuck Sandy Fanny Over meeting tonight?”

“We’re waiting on one more.” Dana said, looking at her phone.

Crowley looked around the room confused. “Everyone’s already here.”

“He’s here,” Dana jumped up from her spot and headed for the door.

“Who?” Crowley asked Bea.

Bea folded their arms and began to blush.

“Hello, hello everyone, I hope you weren’t waiting on me too long, this little village doesn’t run itself you know!”

Aziraphale turned his head at the voice he didn’t recognize to watch Dana leading a tall man with broad shoulders into the room. He was impeccably dressed in a grey suit and had perfectly styled dark hair with a touch of silver at his temples.

“Hi! I’m Gabriel Messenger, Mayor of this little slice of Heaven. I’m sure you’ve heard of me. It’s downright criminal that we haven’t met yet.” He held out his hand for Aziraphale to shake.

“He can’t shake your hand dummy, it’s cut, remember?” Bea grumbled.

Gabriel chuckled. “Of course, of course! Thanks for reminding me honeybee.”

“ ‘Honeybee’?” Half the room questioned.

“Come on, sit down over here.” Dana pushed Gabriel to the loveseat where he sat sandwiched between Dana and Bea. He gave each a peck on the cheek before throwing his arms around them.

“What the actual fuck” Ligur asked.

“What he said,” Hastur grunted.

“Aw babes, you didn’t tell your friends yet?” Gabriel pouted, looking absurd.

“Gotta do it now babe.” Dana smiled at Bea.

“Ugh. Look, it’s not a big deal.” Bea grumbled. “We’ve just got this…thing going on. The three of us.”

“We’re a thruple!” Gabriel beamed.

“Well, that’s exciting, isn’t it?” Tracey exclaimed. Ligur and Hastur exchanged looks of shock, while Rose and Uriel shared an impressed one.

“Look, it’s not a big deal, can we drop it?” Bea’s pale cheeks were dark red now.

“I can’t believe you never told me you were fucking the mayor.” Crowley looked aghast. “And Dana. You are fucking two people.”

“It’s not just fucking,” Dana tossed her hair. “It’s a relationship. We’re actually really happy about it.”

“Well, um, congratulations to the three of you and it’s very nice to meet you Mayor Messenger.” Aziraphale said before glancing over at Newton who mouthed ‘awkward’.

“And you! Call me Gabriel, we’re all friends here! I’ve heard a lot about you, you’ve made quite a stir in our old village.”

“Oh! Well, um…”

“Can we get down to talking about fucking Sandy over or what?” Hastur grumbled.

Uriel spoke up. “I am sorry about telling Rose about what happened today Aziraphale. If it had had anything to do with your medical condition I would have kept it confidential but it just didn’t sit right with me, and once Rose knew, well…” Uriel gestured at the room.

“Angel?” Crowley asked.

“Darling, I want you to know that I didn’t intentionally keep anything from you, it was just a rather terrible morning and when I saw you at the shop it entirely slipped my mind.”

“Alright.”

“And honestly, it was more an annoyance than anything else, and certainly wasn’t the worst interaction that I’ve had with that man.”

“Angel.”

“I’m getting there. Alright. So.” Aziraphale took a deep breath. “Remember, don’t get upset, it was honestly nothing and everyone is making a big fuss.”

“Angel!”

“Alright, alright! After I had signed in at the clinic I was sitting in the waiting area, which was empty by the by. Well, Mr. Fann decided to sit in the seat next to me.”

Crowley clenched his teeth but stayed quiet.

“Ahem. I told him that I wasn’t in the mood to speak to him at the moment, you know, bleeding profusely and all, and he said something along the lines of how such nasty things can come out of my, um, pretty mouth.”

“I see.” Crowley said through his clenched teeth. “Well, that settles that then.” He stood up.

Hastur and Ligur exchanged looks and jumped out of their chairs, moving to block the front door.

“Crowley, where on earth are you going at 9pm on a Wednesday? We have guests!”

“I’m going to kill Sandy.”

Aziraphale jumped up and grabbed at Crowley with his left hand, pulling on his arm. “Oh no you don’t! You’re not going to go to jail and leave me to raise the boys on my own!”

Crowley stopped and turned. “You’d raise the boys if something happened to me?”

“Of course I would, I love them.”

Crowley blinked a few times and fished his glasses out of his pocket, shoving them on his face.

“Crowley, sit down please. We’re all here to figure out a noncriminal way to get rid of Sandy.” Anathema sighed.

“Mostly noncriminal at least.” Dana snorted, swiping on her phone.

“Oh, that’s my little spicy tuna roll! You never know what she’s going to say!” Gabriel grinned.

“I don’t know what’s going to make me puke first, the thought of Sandy even looking at you, let alone saying that creepy shit, or the fucking Mayor, who’s apparently in a thruple with my oldest friend, making comments like that. I need a drink, something harder than beer.”

“Crowley –“

“Let him go love, he’ll be no good until he has a bit of a pout. Come, sit back down with me dearie.” Tracey patted the sofa cushion.

Bea pushed themselves out of their spot and stomped after Crowley. “What the fuck is your problem?”

Crowley was quietly, but forcefully, opening and closing cupboard doors until he found his scotch and poured himself a shot, downing it. “Oh, I don’t know. My oldest friend can form a fucking posse in an afternoon to go after a slimeball for making a comment about my boyfriend, but they can’t tell me that they are not only fucking the idiot mayor but, what, in love with the idiot? And their girlfriend too?” Crowley took another shot.

“He’s my friend.”

“What?”

“Blondie. He’s not just your ‘boyfriend’, he’s my friend. Everyone out there thinks of him as their friend, not just as your boyfriend. Well, not Gabriel but he’s here because Aziraphale is important to me, and Dana. That’s why we’re all here.” Bea took the bottle from Crowley and took a swig. “Look I’m sorry about not telling you. It’s weird, alright?”

“You’re telling me.”

“I went from not being close in that way with anyone for a really long time, to finally getting together with Dana, which is great, but somehow I also ended up with that big golden retriever of a person too. And the really stupid thing is I’m happy. It’s fucked up.”

“Sounds it.” Crowley sighed. “Ok, I feel like an idiot now.”

“Nah, well, yeah, you are one obviously, but I shouldn’t have kept it from you. Just felt weird saying it out loud to anyone.”

“Well, anything you do is far from normal.”

“Thanks arsehole.” Bea handed back the bottle. “Ready to get back in there?”

“Yup.” They strode back into the living room. “Ok, listen up. Bea and Dana and Gabe here are together and Bea doesn’t want to talk about it, so we’re all just going to pretend that’s old news and move on with our lives.” He turned to Aziraphale. “I’m not upset at you for forgetting to tell me about the latest Sandy drama Angel, just pissed off it even happened. Now I’m ready to plot. I’m all ears, but clearly down for murder.” Crowley flopped down beside Aziraphale and pulled him close. Aziraphale sighed and cuddled in.

“Ok, well Dana is privy to a lot of town records, obviously.” Bea started. “Not just Town Hall records.”

“The Village Police share the building with us, and they are not exactly iron clad with their security, ironically.” Dana added, still looking at her phone. “It’s amazing what you can find if you take the time to look.”

“That sounds vaguely illegal?” Aziraphale ventured.

Dana waved her arm. “Don’t worry about it. As I was saying, between tenant complaints, dropped charges and the like, our Sandy isn’t exactly squeaky clean. I think we should hit him where it really hurts though, his wallet.”

“How do you suggest we do that?” Anathema asked.

“Well, he owns three buildings in total. One is a historic property that was converted into flats with very strict guidelines. I have it on good authority that when one of the units had a plumbing issue, instead of restoring the small section of flooring, he had it all ripped out and replaced with something much cheaper, that’s a big no no. I’m sure there are other issues with that building that an inspector would discover.” Dana kept scrolling. “I think it’s high time that the fire department went and checked all the units to make sure that all of the fire detecting equipment is up to date and up to code as well, in all the buildings.”

“Oooo you want to strangle him in bureaucratic red tape.” Anathema laughed.

“Ideally. It might take longer than say murder,” she tipped her head at Crowley and grinned, “but it will be less bloody and I think, more satisfying to see him sweat.”

“Isn’t she something?” Gabriel beamed with pride.

“I feel as though this may be a bit of an overreaction,” Aziraphale spoke up. “He hasn’t physically harmed me, he’s just been…creepy.”

“Hang on Az,” Newton started. “He made us homeless. It all worked out because we have amazing friends but he basically illegally evicted us because you wouldn’t sleep with him. That’s disgusting and dangerous. Ana’s been telling me that he’s fairly aggressive with other people too, making lewd comments, grabbing and such. Mr. Shadwell is pretty close to banning him from the Flaming Sword because of how much he hassles Eric.”

Anathema nodded. “It’s true. There aren’t many queer people in the village but if they are male presenting, pretty and young Sandy has gone after them. So yes, we are doing this because he’s being terrible to you, but also because he’s an awful person and we just want him ideally to leave Tadfield, but I’ll take making him suffer.”

“Guys, murder is still on the table.” Crowley quipped.

“Shush you!” Aziraphale elbowed his ribs.

“We’ll put it on the list if the other things don’t work out.” Dana grinned again. “I’ll draw up some things for you to sign when we’re in the office tomorrow Gabriel.”

“Sure thing!”

Bea rolled their eyes but smiled fondly at the pair.

“Is there anything any of us can do?” Rose asked.

Dana shrugged. “You can keep your eyes open, call him out on his bullshit. I’ll get things moving from Town Hall and hopefully we’ll bury him.”

“Hear hear!” Tracey called, eliciting laughs.

They brainstormed and gossiped for a while longer; Newton fussed over Aziraphale’s hand, taking pictures and promising not to tell Mary, Aziraphale would take care of that tomorrow. The pizza was eaten and the beer was drank, the mess cleaned away and people began leaving. When Aziraphale started yawning Crowley shooed him off to bed. He remembered the gift bag from Tracey and hid it away in a high spot where the boys wouldn’t find it. Crowley had helped him change into pajamas again and get tucked into bed with a glass of water, a pain pill and Ash. Dog joined them in bed after his trip outside and they were cuddled up together.

“I’ll get the boys off to school tomorrow, you stay in bed and sleep.” Crowley kissed the blond curls that were tickling his nose.

“Darling, I can get the boys off to school.”

“Of course you can, you’re amazing, you can do anything. You can do this one thing for me, can’t you love? Stay in bed and rest up and feel better while I take care of everything else?”

“If-if that’s what you’d like.”

“I would very much like that. Now, close your eyes and go to sleep. You’ve had a long day.”

Aziraphale sighed. “Well, I can’t argue with you on that point. Good night darling. I love you.”

“I love you too Angel, so much.”

Notes:

Do I know anything about Landlord and housing laws? No. Am I worried about it? Also no.

I hope you enjoyed this little chapter of plotting, next chapter will have some smut, some care and we'll see some of Dana's work in action! I love her.

Chapter 24

Summary:

Crowley takes care of Aziraphale as only he can.

Lock and Adam come to an important decision.

Notes:

Why am I so bad at summaries?

It's been a while, I know. I'm sorry! Work is getting crazier now that summer is pretty much here and my son was super sick (not Covid thankfully, just some other horrible respiratory bug that won't go away) so it's hard to find time to write more than a few minutes at a time. I hope you enjoy this chapter of smut and a bit of family love at the end, next chapter we're back in the Taking Sandy Down plot :)

Stay safe friends!

“Shhhh you’re going to wake Azi up.”

“But Daaaad I want to say goodbye!”

“Lock-”

“I’m up, I’m up!” Aziraphale struggled to untangle himself from the blankets and hissed when he put weight on his right palm.

“Angel, don’t get up you’ll hurt yourself.”

“I’m fine!” He struggled into a sitting position and reached for his glasses, shoving them on. “Good morning boys, I must have slept through the alarm.”

 

“I’m trying to get them off to school,” Crowley leaned against the doorframe as the boys pushed their way into the room.

“Oh dear, I’m sorry, you should have woken me!”

“I obviously wanted you to sleep.” Crowley rolled his eyes before shoving on his own glasses. “Come on kiddos, say your ‘see ya laters’ and let’s get this show on the road.”

After a drawn-out goodbye from all the Crowley boys, Aziraphale did settle back into the pillows and tried to sleep but found it too difficult to settle again. He fetched a plastic bag from the kitchen, fastened it around his hand and had a very quick and clumsy shower. He pulled on the soft clothes he had worn the night before and wandered downstairs where he fixed himself a cup of tea and settled down to call his mother, Ash and Dog settled nearby.

“Lamb!” Mary exclaimed after Aziraphale had sheepishly told his story and showed him her hand. “It’s not like you to be getting hurt, that’s your brother’s territory!”

“Newton has been remarkably without notable injuries since moving to Tadfield.” Aziraphale mused.

“Does it hurt much Lamb?”

Aziraphale shrugged. “Not so bad today, feels…tight? It was throbbing a bit last night.”

“And is your man taking care of you?”

Aziraphale’s cheeks bloomed. “Well, if it was up to Crowley I’d no doubt be encased in bubble wrap at the moment.”

Mary laughed delightedly. “I like to hear that! I want my boys to be so happy.”

“Well, I won’t speak for Newton, but I’m very happy Mum.”

“I know you are Lamb.”

“Angel, are you sleeping?” Crowley called softly after unlocking the front door.

“I’m in here dear, speaking to Mum.”

Crowley sauntered into the lounge and leaned over the back, kissing Aziraphale on his damp hair.

“Hello Mary. Angel, you were supposed to be sleeping.”

“Oh dear, you’re in trouble now Lamb. Best listen to your man.”

Aziraphale rolled his eyes. “I’ll speak to you later Mum.”

“Yes, let me know how you’re getting on. Love you Lamb! Goodbye Crowley.”

Crowley waved at Mary before Aziraphale clicked the screen and it went black.

“You not only got out of bed, but you showered. How did you manage?” Crowley nuzzled the damp blond curls.

“It was a bit of a struggle but I got there in the end.” Aziraphale shivered. “Get the boys to school alright?”

“Mmmmhmmmm,” Crowley hummed, nuzzling down towards Aziraphale’s ear.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale sighed.

“Angel, how are you feeling?”

“Wonderful at the moment.”

Crowley grinned sharply. “The boys are at school, Bea shooed me out of the shop. Why don’t we head upstairs? Put you to bed.”

“To sleep?”

“Well, we could have a kip afterwards. I want to get a look at what Tracey brought for you.”

“Oh, that woman!” Aziraphale scowled adorably. “In front of all those people!”

Crowley laughed and came around the sofa, offering a hand. Once Aziraphale was standing Crowley swooped in for a deep kiss. “Don’t be too hard on Tracey, she got us together.”

Aziraphale smiled. “Threw us together more like.”

Five minutes later they were stripped to their pants and Crowley had dumped the bag of goodies from Tracey on the bed. “Let’s see, what do we have here.”

Aziraphale was crimson as he watched Crowley pick up a bright blue anal plug and wiggle it about. “It’s like she knew!”

“I hate her.”

Crowley snickered. “You don’t. Oh, look, this feels like silk.” He held up a red scarf. “Perfect way to make sure you keep your hands to yourself, safe and sound, hmmm?”

“Oh good lord,” Aziraphale whispered and shivered.

Crowley looked up sharply. “Let’s put a big pin in that later Angel.”

“Yes please!”

Crowley surged up and captured Aziraphale’s mouth before pinning him to the mattress, gently holding his right wrist. Aziraphale writhed beneath Crowley, trying to grind upwards, desperate for friction.

“We have hours Angel, boys are at school, and here we are.” Crowley licked a hot stripe up Aziraphale’s neck. “I’m going to make very good use of this time.”

“Please, please!”

Crowley growled before nipping Aziraphale’s bare shoulder and sitting up, straddling the younger man, his black briefs tented obscenely. Smiling, he trailed the red silken scarf up Aziraphale’s bare chest. “When your hand isn’t being held together by string, I’m going to tie you to the headboard and fuck you raw.”

“Jesus!” Aziraphale stared up at Crowley, wide eyed and panting.

“You’re going to leave your hand here,” Crowley firmly placed Aziraphale’s right hand on the pillow by his head. “Don’t move it.”

Aziraphale nodded.

“I’ll be cross if you do,” Crowley warned. He reached behind him and grabbed one of the sample packets of lube that Tracey had stuffed into the gift bag. “Let’s get these off,” he put the packet between his teeth as he shimmied Aziraphale’s tartan boxers down. “Look at you love, beautiful.”

Aziraphale closed his eyes and writhed around on the black sheets. “Crowley, please, please do something. Anything.”

Crowley slithered down the mattress and settled between Aziraphale’s spread legs, dragging a pillow with him. He stuffed it under his hips before licking the drop of precum that was glistening in front of him.

“Shit!”

“My baby is wound up tight this morning. Maybe I’ll let you come in my mouth and then let you come again on my cock.”

“God! The mouth on you!”

Crowley smirked before taking Aziraphale’s cock into his mouth while pushing one slippery finger inside him.

Aziraphale arched off the bed, remembering to keep his right hand firmly in its place. He was shuddering and gasping as Crowley worked him open, tongue and lips working along his shaft and swollen tip. After what felt like hours he felt more pressure and opened his eyes, expecting to see Crowley pushing his cock into him. Instead Crowley was slowly pushing the blue plug in. With a toe-curling moan Aziraphale orgasmed while Crowley swallowed him down. When he came back to his senses Crowley was kissing his way up his naked body gently before settling on the bed beside him. “Now you,” Aziraphale gasped, clumsily reaching for him.

“Not a one in, one out sort of deal Aziraphale. Besides, only place I’m planning on coming today is in your arse.”

Aziraphale crushed his mouth clumsily against Crowley’s in a desperate kiss, rolling onto his side and throwing his leg over his lover’s narrow hip, pulling him impossibly closer.

Crowley reached around and played with the plug while they traded heated kisses until he could feel Aziraphale harden again against his own aching member. “Fuck,” Crowley gasped. “Recovery time is wasted on the young.”

Aziraphale giggled. “You recover just fine, if my memory serves me right.”

“Not within minutes Angel. Christ.” Crowley gripped the base of his cock and closed his eyes. “If I don’t get in that arse soon…”

“Oh please, please!”

Crowley growled as he manhandled Aziraphale onto his back once more, pulling the plug out and setting it aside before bending Aziraphale nearly in half and plunging inside.

“Crowley!”

“Fuck! Fuck!” Crowley hissed as he pushed in deeper until his hips were pressed against creamy heated skin.

“Oh god, oh god.” Aziraphale closed his eyes and shuddered.

“Alright?” Crowley choked out.

“Move damn you!”

Crowley set a brutal pace, hammering in and out with short thrusts before lengthen them, almost slipping out before slamming back in. “So good, so fucking good.” He grunted out. “Love you. Love your arse.” Aziraphale huffed a laugh that turned into a moan. “Gonna come in this arse and then I’m going to plug it up, leave my spend in you for a while, then I’ll take it out and eat that arse out, taste myself, maybe I’ll feed some to you.”

Aziraphale came suddenly, incredibly hard all over his stomach and chest, while thrashing and moaning loudly. Crowley groaned and pushed in once, twice before going still and stifling his own moan, shuddering as he emptied inside Aziraphale. Clumsily he reached for the plug and after carefully pulling out he pushed it into place.

“Oh goodness,” Aziraphale moaned.

“Fuck.” Crowley collapsed on the bed, reaching beside him for some tissues and tried to clean Aziraphale’s chest with a shaking hand. “I think that one almost killed me.” He gave up and tossed the tissues on the floor.

“You? The things you were saying!”

Crowley grinned lazily. “You loved every word.”

“That’s beside the point.” Aziraphale somehow managed to sound prim while covered in sweat and ejaculate, pink cheeked and well fucked.

“Alright, time for our kip then we’ll go again!”

“You’re certainly randy today.”

“Ugh, Angel, don’t say ‘randy’.”

“Lustful? Hot to trot? Libidinous?”

Crowley scowled. “How are we a thing?”

Aziraphale giggled as he cuddled into a bony tattooed shoulder.

 

“And Dad didn’t cut our cucumber into shapes, just slices.”

“And he didn’t peel it,” Warlock added.

“Oh dear. I’ll have to give your father a lesson on proper lunch boxes by the sounds of it.” Aziraphale suppressed a smile as Crowley made a face across the table. “Other than the subpar lunch kits, was it a good day?”

“Subpar?” Crowley hissed.

“We got to colour.” Warlock said happily.

“Well that’s always a fantastic day in my book.” Aziraphale smiled and pushed his plate away.

“Dad, you know how Pepper has two mums, right?” Adam asked, playing with his peas.

“Yup. Hard to forget a thing like that.”

“And some people have two Dads?”

“Sure.”

“Well, Pepper calls one of her mum’s Mum, and the other one Ma.”

Crowley nodded. “Yeah, she does.”

“What would you call another Dad, if you already had a Dad but you have another Dad in your house?”

Aziraphale looked to Crowley, wide eyed.

Crowley cleared his throat. “Huh, well, I suppose you could call them both Dad.”

“Too confusing.” Adam stated, crossing his arms.

“Right. Well, there’s daddy I guess, and papa, or pa. Pop?”

Warlock looked at Adam. “I like papa,” he whispered.

Adam thought for a moment. “Papa is good. Azi, we’re going to call you Papa now, ok?”

Aziraphale blinked away a tear. “Um, well…I suppose that would depend on uh, if it was alright with your Father.”

Crowley cleared his throat again. “If that’s something you guys would like to do, it’s fine by me. Is it fine by you Angel?”

Aziraphale nodded happily.

Warlock smiled widely. “Dad and Papa!”

Adam nodded. “Dad and Papa. Can we go play in the back garden now?”

“Put your coats on, take Dog.” Crowley waved them away, bewildered.

“Yay!” Adam pushed his chair away from the table with a loud scrape before bounding out of the room, Warlock running behind him. Dog, who had been lying under the table at Adam’s feet was yipping at their heels.

Aziraphale promptly burst into tears.

“Angel!” Crowley pushed his own chair out, nearly toppling it before gathering Aziraphale up in his arms.

“Are you really alright with this?”

“Angel, the boys have been thinking on this for a while, Adam never goes into anything halfcocked. And I don’t know about you, and yeah, it’s too soon to be saying shite like this, but this is it for me. I’m not letting you go if I have a say in it. Not ever.”

“Oh Crowley,” Aziraphale sobbed into his chest. “I’m so happy.”

“Me too. You’ve done that, for the boys too. You’ve made us all so happy. Made us a proper family.”

Chapter 25

Summary:

The gang puts their plan for Sandy into motion, stand back and watch the fireworks

Notes:

CW for the idea of discrimination/homophobia but we're only discriminating against creeps in this fic

Short and sweet chapter today, hope you enjoy!

“Blimey, would you look at that,” Tracey elbowed Newton in his ribs while they watched the fire inspector arguing with Sandy outside one of his buildings of flats. They were sitting at the counter of Tracey’s shop and had a wonderful view of the proceedings through the front window.

“Doesn’t look to be going very well for him, does it?” Newton mused.

“No indeed. Shame. Tea love?”

“Yes please!”

 

“As I’ve already explained Mr. Fann, part of the responsibility of owning a historical property is maintaining it. You need to follow the protocols put in place by the town council and the historical society. Clearly you have not. A large fine is the least of your worries at this point. You’re looking at having the property confiscated from you in order to preserve it.” Mr. Tyler continued to make notes on his clipboard.

Ligur and Hastur tried to keep the grins off their faces as they sauntered down the sidewalk slowly, listening in on the conversation.

“This is outrageous! This is harassment!” Sandy sputtered.

“What’s outrageous is what you did to the original oak flooring in those flats! You could have sourced replacement for the few floorboards that were water damaged but instead you tore up the whole thing and put down the cheapest you could find. Outrageous indeed!” Mr. Tyler finished writing on his clipboard and looked up. “You’ll have a report within the week, as well as a hefty fine that will need paying. The Council will probably want to hold a special meeting about your ownership of this building, but that’s not for me to say. Good day Mr. Fann.”

“This is a witch hunt! You’ll be hearing from my lawyer!” Sandy screamed.

“Tough luck mate.” Hastur called in passing while Ligur snickered.

“Piss off!” Sandy shouted as he stomped back towards the building.

The couple broke out into loud laughter as they stumbled down the sidewalk.

 

“This is preposterous! I don’t have any cash on me, who carries cash? Why can’t I run a tab like I always do and pay by my card at the end of the night?” Sandy was fuming on the other side of the bar while Shadwell stared him down.

“New policy.” Shadwell grunted.

“Really new,” Eric added as he headed to the back with a tray full of dirty cups.

“If ye don’t like it, ye don’t have to drink here.”

Sandy sputtered. “I’m one of your best customers!”

“Just because you drink a lot doesn’t make you one of my best customers.”

“How dare you!”

“That’s it, you’re banned!”

“What?”

“You heard me! Out, don’t come back!”

“You can’t ban me, I’ve done nothing wrong! This is discrimination!”

“Against what exactly? Slimy gits?”

Sandy’s face was dangerously red. “Because I’m gay!”

“So are half the people who drink here, and Eric. Get out. Don’t come back.”

“You’ll be hearing from my lawyer!” Sandy fumed.

“Don’t let the door hit your arse on the way out!”

 

Bea tried not to blush as they walked up the stairs of the town hall carrying an iced coffee for Dana and disgustingly green drink for Gabriel. They could hardly believe that they were even doing this, that this had become a regular thing. They still had a difficult time even understanding how they had found themselves in this situation in the first place, but when they were tucked into bed with Dana and the big goof…well, it really didn’t matter.

They pushed open the gleaming glass doors with their elbow and stalked into the lobby and stopped short. Dana was leaning against the big mahogany reception desk looking bored while Sandy Fann, red faced and arms flying, yelled at her.

Dana checked their nails. “Not sure what you want me to do about any of this Sandy. Not really my department.”

“I am being unfairly harassed by the village council! I demand to see the mayor! I am a businessman! I do a lot of good for the village!”

“Do you? I don’t remember seeing your name pop up on any of the doner lists for fundraisers. Unless you’re donating anonymously of course.”

“Listen you,” Sandy jabbed Dana in the middle of her chest, startling her. Bea made ready to throw the drinks they were holding and pounce.

“There is no need of that kind of behavior, surely, Mr. Fann.” Gabriel rounded a corner. His smile, usually warm and wide was cold and shark like. He edged into the room and put himself between Dana and Sandy. “Are you alright?” He asked in a quiet concerned voice.

“Yeah, ‘course.”

“Hey, what’s all the excitement?” Bea walked up to the desk and dropped the drinks on the desk before sliding in beside Gabriel, scowling.

“Hi Babes,” Dana said.

Sandy looked at the wall in front of him, confused. “Mayor Messenger, I was just explaining to this woman-”

“Ms. Daggs.”

“What?”

Gabriel smiled wider. “Her name is Ms. Daggs. She is a very important team member, she keeps the town running.”

“Uhh…I was telling Ms. Daggs that I am not going to stand for this sudden vendetta the town seems to have against me.”

Gabriel chuckled. “A vendetta? In Tadfield? Seems unlikely doesn’t it Mr. Fann? Now why don’t you calm down and come back to my office and we’ll have a little chat, hmmm? See if we can’t get to the bottom of your issue.”

Sandy straightened his jacket and raised his head up high. “That’s more like it!”

Bea rolled their eyes as Sandy was led away by Gabriel. They turned to Dana. “You really ok?”

“Yeah, I mean, he jabbed me pretty close to my boobs and that’s an unpleasant thought, but I’m fine. The fact that his spittle has been landing on me for the last five minutes while he ranted is much worse.” Dana took a long sip of the iced coffee Bea had brought her. “Ahh, thanks Babes, really, really needed this.” She leaned over for a sweet kiss.

“He’s lucky Gabe got to him first.” Bea growled.

Dana smiled. “My knight in black tights.”

Bea smiled back but jumped when the slamming of a door was heard echoing through the building.

“Ready for another hissy fit?” Dana asked, grinning.

“And another thing,” Sandy was practically screaming as he stomped his way towards the doors, Gabriel serenely trailing behind, “you better believe that my lawyer will be paying you a visit!”

“I look forward to it, always happy to meet someone new!”

Sandy scowled as he left the building.

“What a dick.” Dana took another slurp of her coffee.

“Aw, honeybee did you bring me a kale smoothie?” Gabriel leaned down and planted a kiss on Bea’s thin lips.

“Would have brought something stronger if I had known that slime ball was here.”

“We got it, no biggie.” Dana shrugged. “He was yelling at poor Shirley so I sent her off and texted Gabe. He’s super pissed. I’m so excited.”

“Your evil plan seems to be working babe.” Gabriel grinned.

“Not evil. He’s a creep. We’re just doing our best to make him some other village’s problem.”

Bea smiled. “I love you, you know. Both of you.”

Dana rolled her eyes. “Obviously. Your place tonight?”

“See you both there.”

Chapter 26

Summary:

With Christmas approaching plans are being made and things are moving on the Get-Sandy-Out-Of-Town front

Notes:

Wow, it's been a minute hasn't it? I haven't forgotten about this fic, I'm back! I will try to do the next update in a more timely manner!
Thank you, and as always, stay safe.

“Do you think that we’ve gotten everything on their wish lists?”

“Everything and more Angel, come back to bed.”

“I was just thinking, maybe I could run up to London and –“

“If you’re still able to think then I haven’t done my job properly, come back here.” Crowley growled, reaching for Aziraphale where he was perched on the side of the bed.

Aziraphale yelped as he was hauled backwards. “Crowley!” Aziraphale briefly struggled before melting into the wiry arms that held him tight. “You know, I’d rather you didn’t speak about our love making as a job.”

“Ugh, ‘love making’? Gross.” Crowley nipped a creamy shoulder. “It’s always a pleasure with you.”

“And you say I’m corny.”

Crowley snorted. “You are! Come on Angel, lay back and relax, enjoy the afternoon before the terrors are home. I’ll be able to go again soon.” He shifted his hips forward.

Aziraphale let out a put-upon sigh. “Not sure I’m enjoying these winter hours of yours.”

“Oi!”

Aziraphale giggled, turning his head so he could kiss Crowley sweetly.

“You’re trouble, you know that?”

“So you tell me, quite often. It’s a wonder you keep me around if I’m such a trouble to you.” Aziraphale hummed closing his eyes.

“As if I’d unleash you on someone else who couldn’t handle you. Doing a public service, I am.”

Aziraphale snorted happily.

They lazed in each other’s arms quietly for a few minutes before Crowley started carding through Aziraphale’s hair with his long fingers. “You nervous?”

“Hmmm?”

“About Christmas?”

Aziraphale tensed for a moment but melted quickly, the feeling of strong fingers running over his scalp making him shiver. “I just want it to be perfect for them.”

“They’re five Az, as long as there are gifts to unwrap they’ll be over the moon. No, don’t you ‘tsk’ at me. It’s true! You’ve found everything that they had on their frankly obscene wish lists, you’ve packed the pantry full of treats and I know that you’ll start baking any day now. They’re even going love those hideous sweaters you bought for us to wear for the Christmas picture. I still don’t know how you found ones small enough for all the pets.”

“They’re part of the family too and they must be included! This is our first Christmas all together, as a family.”

Crowley squeezed Aziraphale even tighter. “You’re insane, you know that? It’s glorious.”

Aziraphale grumbled while Crowley chuckled. They were interrupted by Crowley’s phone buzzing on the nightstand. “I’ll just ignore it.”

“It could be about the boys.”

“They’ll call back.”

“Crowley –“

“Fine!” He rolled away from the warmth of the younger man and groped for his phone frowning when he saw who was calling. “The shop better be on fire.”

Bea snorted. “Are you never not fucking him?”

“Not if I can help it.”

“Gross. Look, Dana said texted that Sandy is having some sort of a conniption in front of the town hall, I was going to check it out, thought you might be interested.”

“Close the shop and get over there, I’m on my way.” Crowley threw the blankets off and began hastily pulling on his discarded clothes.

“What’s happening?” Aziraphale began pulling on his own clothing, panic welling up.

“Sandy’s losing it at town hall, wanna come and throw some petrel on the flames?”

Despite his better judgement Aziraphale smiled.

 

When they parked at the shop and jogged over to join Bea in front of the town hall there was already a sizable crowd gathered. Sandy was red in the face and sweaty despite the chill in the air, tearing up bits of paper and throwing them on the ground, stomping his feet.

“What’s all this then?” Crowley asked as he sauntered up to where Bea stood, a smirk on their face.

“Crowley.” Bea nodded. “Sandy’s not too pleased with the fines that he’s been handed down from the sounds of it.”

Gabriel stood calmly at the foot of the steps, Dana behind him recording Sandy on her phone while two officers took in the scene.

“Oh dear, he’s making such a mess.” Aziraphale frowned and Crowley quickly kissed it off his plump lips.

“Hope the coppers do him in for littering.” Bea snorted. They held their own phone up and took a picture.

One of the officers pulled Sandy aside and spoke to him which only led to more screaming on Sandy’s part. The other officer started waving off the crowd. “Alright everyone, let’s move this along, nothing to see here.”

“Looks like lots to see from where I’m standing.”

“That’s enough out of you Anthony Crowley, go on now.”

“Come on darling.” Aziraphale tugged at Crowley’s arm.

Bea shrugged and slunk after them. “Dana will fill us in later.”

The trio made their way back to the shop, puttering around while waiting to hear anything from Dana or Gabriel. Crowley had sent a group text to everyone involved in the scheme while Aziraphale walked to the school to wait for the bell and pick up the boys. Crowley yawned and stretched, pulling his keys out of his pocket. “What you think, group meet up at our place? Rose and Uriel can bring Pepper and keep the boys occupied. We can either celebrate or drawn our sorrows?”

Bea nodded. “Yeah, sounds good. They must be in the thick of things if she’s not getting back to me.”

“How’s the love thrupple going anyway?”

Bea raised an eyebrow. “You really want to know?”

“I mean, not like the finer details of things, but you’re happy yeah?”

Bea stared at him for a moment. “Yeah. Stupidly happy. It’s fucked.”

Crowley grinned. “It is! Me too! I’m going to marry that guy.”

“Christ, give it a year will you?”

Crowley snorted. “I mean, I’m not going to drop down to one knee anytime soon or anything but that’s the end game. What about you?”

“I’ve no plans to find anyone else if that’s what you’re asking.”

Crowley nodded. “Ok, but like, how does it work?”

Bea glared. “You said you didn’t want any ‘finer details’.”

“Yeah, I know, it’s just hard to picture and-”

“Don’t picture me fucking!”

Crowley snorted. “I mean, I’m not doing it on purpose or anything! But it’s hard not to think about the, you know, logistics. Gabriel is twice your height! And in my experience, someone’s always feeling a little left out in a threesome.”

“You were with some shitty people then.”

“Oh, I’ve never been the one left out.” Crowley wiggled his eyebrows.

“I’m going to puke all over the flowers if you keep this up.”

Crowley bumped Bea with his hip. “Glad you’re happy and getting some is all, I guess I’m trying to say.”

“Yeah, yeah, all the same to you. I hope I don’t look as dopey as you do wandering around.”

“I’m going to take that as a compliment.”

“I wouldn’t but you do you.” Bea cracked a smile. “Send a message out, I’ll be there for sure, I’ll probably close up early and wander over if it’s all the same to you.”

“Yeah, do that. We can talk more about our sexual experiences with our lovers.”

“Fuck right off!”

Crowley cackled as he headed out to the car. “Byeeeee.”

Chapter 27

Summary:

The group meet and discuss the Sandy problem and finally have some good news!

“I thought he was going to have a heart attack, I really did. He was purple, wasn’t he babe?” Dana looked towards Gabriel.

“He certainly was, it was impressive he was still standing.” Gabriel beamed back.

“I was pissed the cops made us leave.” Bea grumbled.

“Ah Babes, it settled down not long after you left, you didn’t miss much!” Dana leaned over and kissed Bea’s blushing cheek.

“Well I’m ever so grateful you sent me the video! I was in the middle of a reading and couldn’t get away.” Tracey sipped her tea, a smile on her face from where she sat tucked into Aziraphale’s side on the sofa, Crowley sprawled out on the other side of him.

A loud thump from upstairs made Aziraphale jump. “I should probably-“

“Leave it Angel, no one’s crying, they’re fine.”

Rose agreed, smiling brightly. “They’re fine Azi, honestly. We’d hear screaming and crying if they weren’t!” She sipped her own tea. “I do wish Uriel was able to be here, but she’s working.”

Crowley nodded. “Hastur and Ligur have got Ligur’s Nan in town for Christmas shopping, so we’ll have to fill them in, and Ana and Newton never got back to our texts.”

“Already sent them the video.” Bea grinned.

“So, two parts of the Triple Threat,” Crowley started.

“Terrible nickname.” Bea groaned.

“Aw, I like it!” Gabriel beamed.

“Course you do. As I was saying, what’s the word?”

The front door suddenly banged, causing everyone in the lounge to jump and gasp as Ana and Newt came in, coats flapping. “Sorry, sorry we’re late!”

“When you didn’t answer my text, I figured you weren’t coming.” Crowley shrugged.

“I just didn’t see it until a few minutes ago, got here as fast as we could.”

Crowley cocked an eyebrow. “Newt, you didn’t see the text that Az sent earlier either?”

“Or the video that I sent both of you?” Bea asked.

Newton’s cheeks turned tomato red.

Tracey clapped her hands. “A little afternoon delight ducks? And it isn’t even a Friday! Good for you.”

Newton and Aziraphale both looked equally horror struck while Ana tossed her coat on the oversized armchair. “What two consenting adults do, or do not, is no one’s concern. Now, can you fill us in?”

“Sure you haven’t been filled in already today?”

“Crowley!”

“Gross.”

“Inappropriate!”

Crowley snickered.

“What are you twelve?” Ana demanded, her own cheeks dusted with pink. She pulled Newton towards the chair where they both arranged themselves.

“He was worse at twelve, if you can believe it.” Bea sighed, then turned to their partners. “Fill us in already!”

Dana grinned sharply. “Well, Sandy was given his report today and it didn’t go the way he was hoping it would.”

“That’s putting it rather mildly honey,” Gabriel smiled.

Dana grinned wider. “Ok, so the report on the historical building he owns basically had him owing fines for almost as much as he bought the place for!”

“No!” Tracey gasped, delighted.

“Yes!” Dana was bouncing in her seat now. “With Mr. Tyler’s report, along with some fines from the fire inspection on both of his properties, as well as all the other stuff going on, he was basically stroking out right there in front of us.”

“He kept saying he was going to sue, it was a witch hunt, things like that. He was hysterical,” Gabriel added.

Dana nodded. “He really was, he was threatening both of us and threatened to burn down the town hall at one point! The coppers had to threaten him with arrest before he finally calmed down enough to sit down and attempt to talk. His lawyer showed up and somehow managed to be even slimer than Sandy.”

Aziraphale pulled a face. “How is that possible?”

“I don’t know Blondie, but he was!” Dana shook her head. “Anyway, we,” she motioned to Gabriel, “sat down with the two of them in Gabe’s office while the police sort of loitered around outside, I think they really thought they were going to have to haul Sandy off to jail. Gabriel was brilliant! He was all smiles and platitudes. He was so serene I thought Sandy was going to flip the desk or something!” She looked over at him fondly.

Gabriel waved his hand. “I was only serene because of your plan Babe.”

Bea rolled their eyes. “Get on with it, christ you two.”

“Right! Anyway, we had our own lawyer pop in for the meeting and it was intense to say the least. There was a lot of back forth and legal bullshit but, but! Basically, and this is amazing, basically the village will agree to wave most of the fines that Sandy has against him if he signs the historical property back to the village, sells his remaining building and donates a percentage of the sale to the village and gets the heck out of here!”

“Is that…legal?” Aziraphale asked.

“Well, it sounded a lot better when our lawyer said it, trust me but yeah, it’s all great, there’s paperwork being filed right now!” Dana smiled even wider if possible.

“Holy shit, remind me to stay on your good side,” Ana joked. “This is amazing!”

“Fuck yeah!’ Crowley cried, fist bumping the air.

“Dad that’s a bad word!” Adam yelled out as he led the other children down the stairs.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale clicked his tongue.

“Sorry kids,” Crowley smiled. “What’s up?”

“We’re hungry,” Pepper said as she crawled into her mother’s lap.

“We can’t have that!” Aziraphale jumped up. “Come on, let’s go see what we can find in the kitchen.”

“Angel-“

“Come on poppet, up you pop, let’s follow these boys and see what we can find for your belly!” Rose said brightly. “Let’s leave the grown ups to their boring talking.”

“But you and Az are grownups.” Pepper pointed out, trailing behind her mother.

“But we are certainly not boring!”

 

Later when Aziraphale had flitted in and out of the room, trays laden with cut sandwiches, sliced cheeses and cured meat, hummus and crackers the conversation was less boisterous on account of little ears but no less joyful as the group munched. Dog and Ash trotted around the room looking for nibbles while Aziraphale sat on the floor with the children sitting close as they had their snacks. Aziraphale managed to take little bites of food here and there and was feeling joyful and light. He idly ran his fingers through Adams curls before dropping a kiss on the crown of Lock’s head. This was his family, the thought struck him. Not just Crowley and the boys, but Pepper and Rose, the trio lovingly squashed together on the love seat, Newton and Ana laughing at something Tracey was saying. All these people, and the few who were missing, these were his family, his real family. He felt a heat in his chest as the realization settled before raising his eyes to meet Crowley’s. Crowley was starting at him intensely and he mouthed “I love you,” before Aziraphale smiled and mouthed “I love you back.” Another realization hit him just as quickly: he was going to marry that man someday.

Notes:

Well Friends, here we are, we're getting close to the end now, just a few more loose ends to tie up and we'll have our happily ever after. I hope that you've enjoyed reading this story half as much as I have writing it. Thank you so much for all of your kind words, they really do mean so much.

Chapter 28

Summary:

With Sandy out of the picture Aziraphale and the Crowley's are able to focus on making this Christmas the best Christmas ever!

The days and weeks following Sandy’s melt down were a whirlwind. Dana kept everyone updated on what was happening at the Town Hall: when the historical building was legally signed over, when the first For Sale sign was up, when Sandy squealed out of town with a moving truck in town, shouting curses behind him. Crowley had popped the cork on a stupidly expensive bottle of bubbly that night after the boys were in bed and the couple drank until they were giggling and falling into bed with one another, waking up with headaches and regrets the next morning when the alarm went off and the boys were yelling for breakfast. It was perfect.

Although it felt like maybe something would go wrong, that Sandy would show up again and do something to throw a shadow over their lives once more, things were settled and Aziraphale was able to breath easier now, feeling lighter every day. He was able to focus on the lead up to Christmas and worked hard to make everything as near as perfect as he could for the Crowley boys. He stuffed the pantry with treats and baked countless goodies, decorated gingerbread houses with the boys and had wrapped gifts hidden all over the house which had more decorations up then it had any other year before. His excitement was practically on par with the two five year old’s in the house.

 

“Dad! Papa! Wake up! It’s Christmas!”

Crowley groaned and pushed his head under his pillow and braced himself as Adam and Lock jumped up on the bed and began crawling all over their fathers.

“It’s still dark.” Aziraphale moaned softly. He had been up late the night before putting the finishing touches on everything to ensure the boys had a perfect morning.

“Papa it’s time to get up,” Lock wiggled his way under the blankets that Aziraphale had pulled up over his face, pressing his cold nose into Aziraphale’s cheek.

“Alright my darling, I’m up, I’m up. Why don’t you two wake up Newton and Ana and Mary as well, maybe with less jumping?”

“Ok!” Adam rolled off the bed and was out of the room in a flash.

“Don’t go downstairs without us!” Crowley yelled after him.

“It’s Christmas!” Lock exclaimed.

Aziraphale hugged him tight before rolling them both so Crowley could hook his arm around the pair. “It is my darling. Happy Christmas!”

 

The morning was a blur of ripped paper and shouts of joy as the adults sat huddled on the furniture, wrapped in warm robes and slurping cups of tea or coffee. All except Aziraphale who excitedly sat in front of the Christmas tree and passed out gifts, sharing in the excitement every time the twins opened a gift and were thrilled.

After the boys had finished opening their gifts Aziraphale and Mary made their way to the kitchen to make breakfast for everyone while Crowley tried to gather up all of the bits of paper and ribbon that Ash, Floppy and Dog were rolling around in.

“Dad where’s Papa’s special present?” Adam asked, looking around.

“Az opened all his gifts,” Crowley pointed to the towering pile next to the sofa. He may have gone a bit overboard.

Adam shook his head. “The little one, remember? In the little box? You wouldn’t let Lock and I see it, you said that was a special present for Papa.”

“Ngk.” Crowley stammered. “Uhhhhh.”

Ana perked up from where she was cuddled with Newton half asleep. “How big was the box Adam?” She grinned at Crowley.

“Really tiny, like this big.” He held his fingers apart. “Dad hid it high up in the closet, said it was a secret.”

Lock nodded. “A secret for Papa.”

“Anthony Jessica Crowley!” Ana squealed.

“Breakfast is ready everyone, if you want to come to the dining room.” Aziraphale poked his head into the lounge.

“Breakfast! Breakfast let’s go, let’s go have breakfast!” Crowley called out loudly.

“Goodness Crowley, what is wrong with you? Why are you yelling about breakfast?” Aziraphale asked.

“Papa, Dad has another gift for you but he forgot it in the closet!” Adam laughed.

“Does he now? Honestly Crowley, you’ve done too much already!”

“I’ll keep it for your birthday!” Crowley shrugged his shoulders, trying to act nonchalant while he nervously chewed on his lip.

Lock pouted. “Papa should get his present, it’s Christmas.”

“Yeah, I think Papa should get his special gift right now!” Ana agreed.

“Ana,” Newton warned. “Maybe Crowley wants to give Aziraphale his special gift later when they are alone.”

Aziraphale looked horror struck. “Crowley!” He hissed. “Not in front of the children!”

“It’s not that kind of a gift Angel, christ!” Crowley threw his arms up in the air.

“Well, what is it then?”

“Is anyone coming to eat?” Mary popped her head into the lounge. “Lamb and I made a nice spread!”

“Dad forgot to give Papa a present.” Adam answered. “We want him to go get it and he won’t!”

“Apparently it’s a private present.” Aziraphale looked to his mother who raised her eyebrows. “Not that kind! At least I hope not! Goodness sake, let’s all go eat.” His cheeks were pink and he was flustered as he ushered the twins into the dining room.

“Fucks sake,” Crowley muttered. Newton gave him a sympathetic look as he passed by.

“We’ll be in in a second, start without us!” Ana called, taking Crowley by the shoulders. “Where is it? I want to see!”

“This wasn’t supposed to happen, fuck.” Crowley muttered again, shaking his head.

“Crowley!”

“Fine! Come upstairs.”

After digging around on the top of a shelf in the walk in closet Crowley handed Ana a small black ring box.

“Oh my god! It is a ring!” She squealed.

“Shhh!”

“Sorry, sorry!” Ana whispered as she careful opened the box and sighed happily. Nestled in the ring box was a delicate white gold band engraved with three forget-me-nots flowers with the tiniest diamonds in the middle of each.

“It’s an antique.” Crowley muttered. “Saw it when I was looking for Christmas gifts for him. Just had to buy it. The boys saw the box when I was showing them some of the things I had bought, I panicked. Wasn’t going to give it to him now, just wanted to have it for when you know, it was right. I know it’s too soon and-”

Ana snapped the box shut and threw herself at Crowley. “It’s perfect!” She cried. “Crowley it’s perfect and you two are perfect together. You were waiting for him and he was waiting for you. Your auras are beautiful together, they just…melt into one another.”

“Well, I don’t know about that aura shit but the rest of it,” Crowley gave a watery chuckle. “I love him so fucking much Ana.”

“So go make an honest man out of him!”

“It’s not too soon? Isn’t it super cliché to get engaged on Christmas? I thought I’d make a big deal about it, maybe take him away to Paris on a weekend in the Spring…”

Ana nodded. “You could totally do that. Az would love that, every second of it. Or you could go down there and get on one knee with your family around you and then you can plan a Spring wedding with a honeymoon in Paris.” Ana’s eyes were shining with unshed tears.

Crowley sniffed and wished he was wearing his sunglasses. “Yup. Could do that I suppose.”

“It’s up to you.” Ana handed him back the box.

Crowley put it in the pocket of his robe. “Let’s go get some breakfast.”

Ana jumped up and down and hugged Crowley again.

 

“And what was your favorite gift you received Adam?” Mary asked as Ana and Crowley slipped into the dining room.

“Maybe my dinosaur?” He answered while chewing on his pancake.

Aziraphale looked up. “There you two are, get some food before it gets cold!”

Crowley exchanged a nervous look with Ana who grinned and nodded before taking a seat beside Newton and squeezing his hand.

“Before I do that, I uh, have a question for you.” Crowley cleared his throat.

“Alright.” Aziraphale smiled brightly. “What is it?”

“Ok, so, uh, fuc-fudge.” Crowley rubbed the back of his neck. “I ugh, didn’t plan this out like this, I didn’t have much of a plan as it was, just an idea, a hope and a need.” Crowley walked around the table to where Aziraphale sat. “And you know how much you mean to me, how much you mean to us.” He gestured to the boys who sat munching away.

“Yes, of course Crowley, what-” he gasped as Crowley kneeled on one knee before him and held up the ring box.

“Aziraphale, Magpie, Angel. I know it’s been fast for us, but I knew instantly that you were an amazing person and I needed to have you in my life, and the life of my sons, our sons. You have made every day brighter just by being in it, your smile lights up the room and your eyes, they kill me. Oh and your hair! Well, everything about you.” He took a deep breath. “Will you make me the happiest man in the world and say yes?” He opened the ring box and held it up.

Aziraphale was crying, tears sliding down his face as he nodded.

A tear ran down Crowley’s cheek. “Yes?”

Aziraphale nodded again. “Yes!” He gasped.

Crowley surged up and threw his arms around Aziraphale, cutting off his sob with a kiss.

“He said yes!” Ana cried out, clapping his hands. “Your Dad and Papa are going to get married!”

“Married?” Lock asked.

“Married!”

Adam and Lock jumped down from their seats and pushed their way in between the happy couple. “You are getting married?” Adam asked.

“We are, what do you think?” Crowley asked, his voice rough.

“Married forever?” Lock asked.

“Yes my darling, forever.” Aziraphale half sobbed, pulling the boys into the hug.

“My little lamb is getting married!” Mary cried, wiping her eye with a napkin. “I can’t believe it! I’m so happy for all of you!”

“Congratulations little brother.” Newton smiled.

“Are we thinking a Spring wedding?” Ana prodded.

“I haven’t even put the ring on him yet Ana, give us a moment yeah?”

“Oh! Put the ring on me! Put it on!” Aziraphale held out his shaking hand.

“Gladly Angel.” He took the ring out and carefully slid the ring on to Aziraphale’s finger. “Look at that, it fits!”

“It’s perfect Crowley!” Aziraphale admired it then pulled his fiancé in for another kiss.

“Ewww!” Adam cried as he pulled Lock away and they scurried into the lounge to their new toys, leaving the adults behind.

Crowley grinned into the kiss and stood up. “So, are we thinking a Spring wedding?”

“Whatever you want, I’ll marry you today!” Aziraphale laughed.

“Are we eager for the honeymoon Angel?”

“Ahem.” Newton waved his arms at himself and his mother. “Can you not?”

“Oops, sorry about that, bro.” Crowley grinned.

“Another son.” Mary sighed happily, standing up and pulling the couple into a hug. “Congratulations to you both.”

Ana dragged Newton over and forced their way into the hug while Aziraphale laughed happily.

“We’re getting married!”

“We’re getting married Angel.”

Notes:

Thank you for reading! We are getting closer and closer to the end my friends! I'm getting sad just thinking about it, but I'm blown away by all the support that you have given me over these months, it means so much to me.

Chapter 29

Summary:

It's a beautiful day for a wedding...

“Are you nervous?”

Aziraphale blinked up at Ana who had just finished helping with his wedding makeup. “Why, do I look it?” He stared at himself in the mirror of the master bath.

“No, no, you just have a very determined look on your face.”

“I’m…well I suppose I’m nervous about the people bit, you know, being the center of attention and all that but I’m not nervous about marrying Crowley.”

“It’s all people that you know and who love you Az.” Ana smiled as she packed away the cosmetics.

“How is it going in here?” Newton poked his head into the bathroom.

“Perfection, obviously.” Ana said with a wink. “How are things going out there?”

“Crowley’s still trying to add more flowers to the wedding arch and looks like he’s going to vibrate right out of his suit.”

“Let’s hope he manages to keep it on until tonight.” Ana laughed at Aziraphale’s blush.

“I told him not to fuss so much! It’s a simple ceremony in our back garden with twenty people.” Aziraphale sighed.

“He just wants it to be perfect for you.” Newton said softly.

“I know, but today is for the both of us, not just me. It’s not as if I’ve been some terrible groomzilla about the whole thing, but he’s acting like every little detail needs to be perfect or the whole day will be a wreck!” He smoothed his shirt again and looked at himself critically in the mirror. “Has Mum got the boys and Pepper ready to go?”

Newton grinned. “She does and they look fantastic in their little matching suits.”

“I can’t wait to see them!” Ana cooed. “The flower boys and the ring bearer.”

“Pepper was very insistent on not wearing a dress or carrying flowers and Lock and Adam couldn’t have been happier to toss flower petals about, so it all worked out.”

Eric popped his head in. “Az, you look gorge! Can I snap some pictures?” He held up his camera. “I got some of Crowley and Bea getting ready earlier, and him out in the garden on a flower placing warpath, so it’s your turn now!”

“I thought I would be there nervous one!” Aziraphale laughed as Newton helped him into his light blue jacket and fixed his bow tie all while Eric snapped away.

“Mum’s got our boutonnieres ready for us downstairs, she wants to put them on us.”

“It’s nearly time, isn’t it? Can we head down?”

“I’ll go ahead and make sure Crowley is somewhat clam and waiting for you, see you out there Az!” Ana skipped away.

“I’ll go downstairs so I can get some pictures of you coming down them!” Eric followed her.

“So, just us now, how are you really?”

“I’m…peaceful Newton. I’m nervous because everyone will be looking at me, but I’m just so happy to be making this official.” He fiddled with his engagement ring.

“Good, I’m so happy for you Az.” Newton pulled him into a tight hug. “Let’s get you married!”

After walking down the staircase slowly so Eric could take the pictures he wanted, Aziraphale was fussed over by Mary who talked a mile a minute as she pinned on the boutonnieres Crowley had made specially. After blinking away some tears she pulled herself together and clapped her hands. “Alright, where are my little ones?”

The trio of kids came running into the room and Aziraphale had to put his hand to his heart and hand to concentrate on not crying. “You three are adorable!”

Pepper rolled her eyes and patted the child sized brief case she held. “They’re safe.”

Lock held up his basket. “We’re ready Papa!”

“Alright, alright let’s go!” Mary shoed the children towards the patio door. “You three wait here while I go sit down and when the music starts you can come down the aisle. Remember there are seats in the front row for you.”

“We remember.” Adam said, nodding. “We’re ready.”

Mary took one more look at Aziraphale. “I love you Lamb.”

“I love you too Mum.”

“Try not to trip Fawn.”

“Mum!”

Mary giggled as she made her way out into the garden towards her seat.

“Ok guys,” Newton pointed to the door, “time to go! Take your time, walk slowly and together. See you out there!”

The three linked arms and walked outside. Newton watched them go and then turned back to Aziraphale. “Ok, I’m going now, see you up there!”

“Don’t trip!”

“Not you too! I’m going to do it for sure now!” Newton hissed.

Aziraphale giggled as he watched his brother very carefully head out of the house. He breathed in deeply and waited a minute before he headed out into the sunshine.

The garden was beautiful, of course it was. It was in full bloom already and Crowley had planted more flowers and shrubs along the fence in the weeks leading up to the wedding on top of the potted blooms that were scattered about. The scant guests stood up from their white wooden chairs when Aziraphale stepped outside and were watching him as he made his way slowly down the makeshift aisle towards the beautiful archway that Ligur and Hastur had built them, which was now dripping with blooms of every size and color. Underneath the arch was the justice of the peace, Newton, Bea and most importantly of all Crowley in his devastatingly handsome navy suit and sunglasses. Aziraphale was already reaching his hands out towards him before he had even reached the arch. Crowley took them and squeezed them tight.

“Angel,” Crowley breathed quietly, like a secret only meant to be heard by the pair.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale sighed in answer.

The Justice cleared his throat. “Welcome everyone to the union of Anthony Crowley and Aziraphale Fell on this truly beautiful day. Marriage is a legal union, a coming together of two but beyond that it means you are making a commitment to one another to always be there for each other. It means you will be there to share in one another’s joy during happy occasions and will be there to support and comfort one another during difficult times. You will forever walk the path of life alongside one another and experience everything it has to offer you together as a married couple. The grooms have written their own vows. Anthony, you can begin when you’re ready.”

Crowley sucked in a deep breath. “Don’t know why I’m so nervous!” He quipped. He let go of Aziraphale’s hands to take his sunglasses off and put them in his breast pocket.

“Oh Crowley, your eyes! You’ll get a terrible headache!”

Crowley took Aziraphale’s hands back and swept his thumbs gently over his knuckles. “I’ll survive a few minutes; I need to see you properly. Aziraphale part of me doesn’t believe that this is even happening, that I was ever lucky enough to get someone like you to be a part of my life. I don’t know what I thought, maybe that I’d try dating when the boys were at uni or something.” He chuckled. “Tracey knew better and practically threw you at me, and I was pretty much gone right from day one. You were, and are, the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. You shine from the inside out and your smile knocks me out every time you turn it on me. You loved my boys right away and in no time at all they became our boys. You have added so much joy to this big ol’ house. A year ago it was just the three of us, and we were happy. We’re so much happier now with you and Dog, Ash, and Floppy. Hard to imagine life without all of us now! I love you Angel. I am so full of love for you sometimes I worry that my chest is going to crack open and it’s all going to come spilling out all over the place. I already thought I was the happiest I could be with my boys, but you have managed to make me even happier, the happiest man alive. For as long as I live, I promise you, I will do everything I can to give you the best, happiest life you could ever wish for. I love you.” He gently dropped Aziraphale’s hands and used his thumbs to wipe away the silent tears that were running down Aziraphale’s cheeks.

Aziraphale took a breath. “Goodness, I wish I had gone first now.” A chuckle ran through the crowd and Crowley grinned. “Crowley, we’re getting married! I never thought when I followed Newton to Tadfield that I would find my forever home, that I would understand what true happiness was, that I would find my person! I never had a real home or family until I found my way to Mum and Newton, and then again here in Tadfield, with you and Adam and Lock, oh and Ash, Dog and Floppy of course! I didn’t realize until I met you that I could have all of this, a home, a family, love. I have found love with you Anthony J. Crowley, a love that has been a bit terrifying at times I will admit! Overwhelming and consuming and perfect. I am beyond grateful that I moved here, that we were pushed together and that we were drawn to one another. I am so grateful that you have been my first and will be my only love.”

Crowley looked like he desperately wanted to shove his glasses back on, but he cleared his throat and instead rested his forehead on Aziraphale’s.

“Can we have the rings please?” The Justice asked.

Pepper stood up and placed the brief case on her empty seat before opening it. She carefully took out the two ring boxes and slowly, seriously walked them over to Bea.

“Thanks kid,” Bea took them from her, opened them both and handed the rings to the Justice before pocketing the empty boxes.

“Anthony, please repeat after me. ‘I Anthony J. Crowley take you Aziraphale Zachariah Fell to be my husband. To have and to hold from this day forward, to honor and to cherish you in sickness and health, for richer and for poorer and will be faithful to you for as long as we both shall live.”

In a trembling voice Crowley recited the words.

“Now Aziraphale it’s your turn. ‘I Aziraphale Zachariah fell take you Anthony J. Crowley to be my husband. To have and to hold from this day forward, to honor and to cherish you in sickness and health, for richer and for poorer and will be faithful to you for as long as we both shall live.”

In a slow watery voice Aziraphale managed to repeat the words.

“Your wedding rings are a visible sign of your eternal love for one another. As you look at them from day to day may they remind you of the promises you have made here together. Anthony, place this ring on Aziraphale’s finger and repeat after me: With this ring I thee wed, and pledge you my love.”

Crowley took the offered ring and with trembling fingers he slowly slid it on Aziraphale’s ring finger. “With this ring I thee wed, and pledge you my love.”

“Aziraphale, place this ring on Crowley’s finger and repeat after me: With this ring I thee wed, and pledge you my love.”

Aziraphale’s hands were shaking so badly he almost dropped the ring but managed to get it on Crowley’s offered finger. “With this ring I thee wed, and pledge you my love.”

The Justice smiled. “You have both declared your intention to take each other in marriage through these vows you have accepted and these rings you have exchanged. With the authority that has been granted to me it is my great honor and privilege to pronounce you married! You may now kiss one another!”

Crowley swooped in, his hands on either side of Aziraphale’s face and kissed him deeply, ignoring the whoops and wolf whistles their friends lobbed at them.

“We’re fucking married!” Crowley cried as he pulled away.

Aziraphale, pink cheeked and slightly dazed stared back at him. “We’re fucking married!”

Crowley threw his arms around Aziraphale and kissed him again, laughing into the kiss as Aziraphale clung to him. When they broke apart Crowley looked to their family and friends. “Let’s party!”

Notes:

The chapter was getting unruly so I had to break it into two parts, the next part will feature some married couple smut
We are nearing the end, I'm estimating two more chapters which is hard for me to believe, this has been such a rewarding experience for me, and the fact that some of you have been reading since the beginning means so much.

Chapter 30

Summary:

Crowley and Aziraphale enjoy their first night as a married couple

Notes:

This is just pure honeymoon smut, the smuttiest of smuts that I have ever written. If that's not your thing, seriously just skip this chapter, I'll catch you in the next one (which will be the last one of this work!)

Crowley threw his head back and cackled at something that Tracey had just whispered in his ear. He held Adam in one arm, had his other thrown around Aziraphale, keeping him pressed close to him, while Aziraphale held Lock in his own arms.

“I don’t even want to know what you just said to him!” Aziraphale huffed good naturedly.

“You really don’t Angel.”

Tracey tutted. “I just told our Crowley that I put your wedding gift in his luggage, that’s all. Best to be used on your little upcoming honeymoon!”

Aziraphale blushed to the tips of his ears. “Tracey!”

She grinned. “You’d expect nothing less from me Duck.” She kissed Aziraphale’s cheek then Crowley’s, then added loud smooches to both boy’s cheeks for good measure, making them giggle. “Are you excited for your little vacation away from your Dad and Papa?”

“Mary’s going to stay for bit and Ana and Mr. Newton are going to stay here at our house too!” Adam bounced in his father’s arms.

“I want to go with you Papa.” Lock whispered into Aziraphale’s ear.

Aziraphale pouted. “I know darling, I want you both to come as well, but once school is over we will do a vacation, a family vacation!”

“Promise?”

“I promise little love.”

Crowley leaned over and bumped his forehead against Lock’s gently. “You’re going to be spoiled rotten by Mary and Ana and Newton while we’re gone.”

“And me!” Tracey piped up. “I’ll be around with ice cream!”

Lock smiled. “That sounds alright.”

“Alright? Alright? Sounds like a lot of fun. Maybe we better stay home Angel, the twins might have too much fun without us!”

“Dad!” Adam laughed.

“Yes, ‘Dad’, don’t be silly. We will have our own fun in Paris.”

“Too right we will.” Crowley grinned sharply.

Aziraphale shivered.

“Speaking of which, the car’s going to be here soon to take you to London, you have a train to catch! Go on, go get changed, I’ll keep these little monsters entertained.” Tracey shooed the men towards the house after they each set down one of the boys.

Crowley rested his hand low on Aziraphale’s back as Hastur wolf whistled.

“We’re just getting changed for the trip!” Aziraphale shot back.

“Sure, sure!” Dana called after them. “I’ll set a timer shall I?”

Crowley stuck two fingers up in the air as he led his new husband into the house.

 

Aziraphale’s back hit the wall hard as Crowley captured his mouth in a searing kiss. They had been tempted to mess around while changing out of their wedding suits earlier in the day, but their guests and the kids were in and out of the house and Crowley had whispered about ‘taking his time’ with his new husband and properly seeing to him.

Saying goodbye to the boys was harder than either of them thought and they both had shiny eyes in the backseat of the taxi on the way to the train station. They knew the boys were in good hands, and they would be back in four days. The train ride itself was a special kind of torture. They sat close to one another, Crowley always touching Aziraphale; trailing long fingers over the back of Aziraphale’s neck, rubbing circles on his back, a hand on his knee, his thigh….by the time the baggage attendant left the hotel room, and the door was closed Aziraphale felt faint with desire.

“Fucks sake, who’s idea was this anyway? Why didn’t we leave in the morning? Could have already had you by now, had you a few times.” Crowley growled into Aziraphale’s neck, nipping and sucking between words.

“Ah! It was oh, god yes! It was yours darling.”

“I’m a fucking idiot.” Crowley ground out before mashing their mouths together again in a stinging kiss. When he pulled back Aziraphale sagged against the wall, barely holding himself up. Crowley, looking unaffected other than the obviously large bulge in his tight jeans went to their luggage and unzipped it. “Get us a towel will you love?”

It took a few seconds to get his legs to cooperate but Aziraphale managed to peel himself from the wall and head into the bathroom where he gasped. “Crowley! The tub is even bigger than the one we have at home!”

“I picked this suite for the view, the king sized bed and the ensuite. I don’t think we’ll be going anywhere tomorrow. I’ll take you out and show you off, but tomorrow we live here.”

Aziraphale walked back towards the bedroom with the towel. Cowley took it from him and spread it out on the massive bed, the blankets having been turned down. “Come here, need you naked, now.” He had Aziraphale undressed in record speed and put him on his hands and knees. “Fuck, look at you!” Crowley’s voice was rough.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale whined.

“I know love, soon.”

Aziraphale heard Crowley stripping and dropping his clothes, then heard him dropping things near him before the bed dipped and Crowley was behind him, leaving hot trailing kisses down his spine.

“Oh god.” Aziraphale’s arms were already shaking.

“Just me Angel, just your husband.”

Aziraphale sighed “My husband!” before he squeaked, Crowley’s tongue surprising him as it trailed up and down his cleft before lapping at the very center of him.

“Crowley, oh lord, I won’t last!”

Crowley pulled away. “Don’t then Angel. Here’s my idea see what you think,” he kissed Aziraphale’s hole. “I eat you out like the starving man I am. Eventually I finger you. Maybe see if you can take all my fingers.”

“Fuck,” Aziraphale whined.

“If you come, fantastic. You’ll come again. And maybe even again, young man like you, I bet you could, don’t you? Come for me as many times as I want you to.”

“Crowley-”

“You’ll be my good boy won’t you? You’ll be my good boy and come for me as many times as I need you to?”

The noise Aziraphale made sounded like a wounded animal.

“I think I’d like that. I think I’d be chuffed if you came on my tongue, my fingers and my cock on our wedding night. Can you do that love? Can you do that for your husband.”

Aziraphale moaned and shakily nodded. “Yes, yes, please yes.”

“That’s my good boy.” Crowley cooed before he spread apart Aziraphale’s cheeks and dove in again, lapping and sucking, moaning almost as much as Aziraphale was.

“Crowleycrowleycrowely,” Aziraphale chanted before his arms gave out and he landed on his face, ass up and being devoured by his husband. He wailed when he felt Crowley’s long tongue push in and wriggle about before he came all over the towel and his stomach, crying out Crowley’s name.

Crowley slowed to a stop and pulled back panting. “Fuck Angel, you’re amazing, you know that?” He gripped the base of his cock painfully tight. He planned on coming only once tonight. He closed his eyes before he reached for the lube. “You want to stay like this for a bit or roll over?”

Aziraphale panted but wiggled his bum in a “get on with it” motion.

“Brat,” Crowley laughed before bending down and nipping at first one cheek then the other, pulling gasps and giggles out of Aziraphale. He managed to wrestle a pillow underneath Aziraphale’s hips so he could prop him up a bit, then coated two fingers with lube. He rubbed them all over Aziraphale’s sensitive rim before slowly pushing one in smoothly. Aziraphale groaned happily. “Fuck you always take me so well Angel. You were made for me, christ.” He pushed his other finger in and in no time was slowly fucking Aziraphale smoothly, the blond pushing back his hips, soft moans escaping his lips. “You want another finger love?”

“Yes, please!”

“You hard for me again?”

Aziraphale moaned. “Yes!”

Crowley grinned before pulling out and coating a third finger in lube before carefully pushing all three in. “Fuck, look at you.” He was careful not to graze Aziraphale’s prostate too much, he wanted to do this for as long as the other man would let him. Aziraphale was moaning softly and pushing his hips back to meet Crowley’s fingers on each thrust. “You were made for this weren’t you? Made to be fucked, made to take cock.”

“Only yours!”

“That’s right!” Crowley growled. “Only ever mine, my cock is the only cock you’ll ever know the feel of, the taste of, isn’t that right.”

Aziraphale sobbed in answer.

“I think you can take four.”

“Crowley, I can’t, I can’t, I need you, please, I need you.”

“You have me Angel, right here, I’m watching my fingers disappear into your greedy little hole, it looks like it wants more. Can you do that? Can you take more for me? Still green?”

Aziraphale moaned but choked out “Yes, green!”

Crowley shuddered and palmed himself to try to relieve some of the pressure. He was painfully hard and leaking all over his stomach. “Alright Angel, here we go. Four. You’ve never taken four.” Soon the lubed up digits were pressing into Aziraphale again and he screamed, shuddering as came for the second time.

“Shush, you’re alright.” Crowley rubbed his free hand up and down Aziraphale’s back. “That was beautiful.”

“Crowley, need to see you.” Aziraphale sobbed.

“Yes love of course.” He pulled his fingers out and admired the gape of Aziraphale’s hole before helping him roll over and settle. He settled in beside him and kissed him softly. “So beautiful, you’re doing just what I asked you to do. You’re going to come on my cock next.”

“Crowley, I don’t think I can!”

“Shhh, we’ll try in a minute, yeah, let you catch your breath.” Crowley pulled him into a soft kiss as he wiped way the drying tears.

“I’m green, I don’t know why I’m crying.”

Crowley smiled. “You feel so good don’t you? I made you feel good?”

“Yes,” Aziraphale sighed. “I want to make you feel good too.”

“You will. You are. When I fuck your arse and fill you up, I’m going to put this plug in you,” He held up a plug, larger than the one that they usually used, “so I can keep you wet and open. Then when we wake up I’ll fuck you again.”

Aziraphale moaned, feeling his spent cock impossibly twitch again. “I don’t think I can get hard again Crowley, but I want you to fuck me.”

Crowley ran his fingers all around Aziraphale’s loosened wet rim. “I think you will love, I know you will. You’ll get hard for me and then I’ll give you want you really want.”

Aziraphale whined, over sensitive but wanting nothing more but to have Crowley inside him, filling him perfectly. His cock twitched again.

Crowley pouted. “My poor Angel, I left you all messy.” Leaving his fingers to play, he snaked down the bed and lapped up the smeared come from Aziraphale’s stomach before taking the head of his cock into his mouth and gently sucking.

Aziraphale wailed as Crowley swirled his tongue and pressed two fingers inside and rubbed on his prostate.

“Oh fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!” He felt his cock filling in Crowley’s hot mouth and started laughing hysterically.

“Not sure that’s the reaction I’m looking for love,” Crowley quipped after he pulled off. “But it got us to where we needed to be.” He pulled his fingers out and hissed as he slathered lube onto his own aching cock. “I’ll probably blow my load in about three seconds,” he warned. “Watching you come, feeling you on my tongue, my fingers.” He shuddered as he slowly started feeding his cock into Aziraphale’s heat. “If it hurts I’ll stop.” He assured him.

Aziraphale arched his back and hooked his legs around Crowley, pulling him closer. “I need you.” He cried out. “Now!”

“Fuck!” Crowley slammed into him, bottoming out in no time and set a brutal pace. “Fucking hell Angel, you feel so good, unlike anything,” He ground out, hiking his husband’s legs up to rest on his shoulders as he leaned in for a brutal kiss. “You make me wild!”

Aziraphale moaned in response as he was fucked brutally, blissfully into the mattress.

Crowley wrapped a lubed hand around Aziraphale’s cock and stroked it. “You can do it Angel, you can, let me feel you come around me, I can’t last, I’m not going to last, fuck, I’ll fuck you for as long as you want tomorrow but I can’t, I’m going to come, I need you to come first.”

Aziraphale’s mouth opened in a silent scream, his whole body shuddering, his cock twitching, barely drooling as he felt Crowley’s cock spurting hotly inside him.

“Angel,” Crowley roared as he ground his hips again and again before he stopped, sagging and panting before he reached for the plug. He pulled out and shoved it in before too much come could escape, making Aziraphale cry out.

“shhhhh do you want me to take it out, does it hurt? Did I hurt you?”

Aziraphale shook his head as he gasped.

Crowley collapsed beside him as he gasped and tried to catch his breath. Eventually he was able to stand and he carefully cleaned up the both of them and forced Aziraphale to swallow some water before he turned off the lights and pulled the blankets over them.

When Aziraphale’s head was less fuzzy he mumbled into Crowley’s chest, “I hope these rooms are soundproofed.”

Crowley snickered. “It’s Paris, if you come here you have to expect to hear people fucking.”

Aziraphale wrinkled his nose. “I don’t want to hear other people having…relations.”

Crowley snorted. “After what we just did, you still can’t say ‘fucked’?”

“Good manners and grammar cost nothing.”

“I can’t believe I married the sexiest nerd in the world.”

“And I can’t believe I married the only man in history who manages to walk around with no hips.”

“Fuck, we really are married now aren’t we?”

“Yes, you’ve taken my virtue, you can’t give me back now.”

“Took that a long time ago love,” Crowley yawned, the day and evening catching up to him. “Sleep Angel.”

“You too darling. I love you, husband.”

“I love you too, husband.”

Chapter 31

Summary:

An epilogue two years in the future

“Here’s your tea Ms. White.” Aziraphale handed the slim grey-haired woman a steaming mug.

“Oh! Thank you, Mr. Crowley. I was caught up in watching your husband and the kids.”

Aziraphale chuckled. “I don’t know how he keeps up with them if I’m honest. He always tells me that I’m so young and full of life but he has far more energy than I do.”

Ms. White set her mug on the patio table and opened the file folder she had brought with her. “She looks wonderful, as usual.”

Aziraphale beamed. “She’s lovely, the boys, including Crowley, just adore her.” Aziraphale looked out into the back garden where Crowley was chasing around the twins and a chubby little red headed toddler who was shrieking with joy and running as fast as her little legs would carry her. Dog was barking and running around in circles, tail wagging nonstop. Eventually Crowley jogged over to the adults and kissed Aziraphale before falling into his own chair, legs kicked out. Wordlessly Aziraphale handed Crowley his own mug of tea.

Crowley took a slurp. “Ta Angel.” After placing the mug on the table he turned his head. “So, why are you here again so soon?”

“Crowley!”

“What? She was just here last week.”

“I’m sorry Ms. White, ignore my rude husband.”

Ms. White smiled. “No, it’s a valid question.” She sipped her tea again then flipped through the open folder. “You had Lilly placed with you nearly six months ago. She had just turned two, was a thin little thing, wasn’t talking, was barely playing. Look at her now! So plump and happy, I think she has half a dozen new words every time I drop in to check on her. She is thriving.”

Aziraphale smiled softly. “We love having her here, we love her. She has fit in so well, the boys just adore her.” He reached for Crowley’s hand. “As do we.” He straightened up in his chair. “You’re taking her, aren’t you? Her family wants her back? I knew it would happen, I remember what it was like, never being somewhere for too long.”

Crowley gripped Aziraphale’s hand tightly, gritted his teeth. “That why you’re here then? To take her? Bit of notice would be nice.”

“I was actually wondering if perhaps you would be interested in making this arrangement...more permanent?”

“Excuse me?” Aziraphale looked at the social worker with wide eyes.

“Her parents have given up their parental rights. Her father is in prison and her mother is…no longer interested in providing any kind of care for Lilly. She would like her to be adopted, a closed adoption. We like to keep children where they are thriving, where they are happy and loved, if possible. There is so much love here, in this house and in this family. If you were interested in adopting Lilly-”

“Yes.” Crowley interrupted.

“Yes?” Ms. White asked with a smile. “You don’t need to discuss it?”

Aziraphale’s lip trembled, shaking his head. “Yes, yes please yes. The thought of letting her go…” He nodded. “Yes.”

“Wonderful!” Ms. White stood up. “Why don’t you two come into the office on Friday and we can get the process started, three o’clock?”

“We’ll be there.” Crowley affirmed, eyes back on the children.

“Thank you so much, I’ll see you out!”

“No need, I know my way now. Enjoy the rest of your day Mr. and Mr. Crowley.”

“Angel.”

“Crowley!”

They turned towards one another and embraced, then kissed.

“Ugh, gross!” Adam yelled.

“Don’t look Lilly, Dad and Papa are being gross as usual!” Lock cried.

Lilly giggled and fell over in the grass, her brothers quickly righting her.

Crowley grinned as he pulled away, held up his mug of tea to Aziraphale who tapped his own against it. “To our little world Angel.”

Aziraphale sighed happily. “To our world.”

Notes:

Well here we are! I knew this was how I wanted this story to end, but I didn't know exactly how we would get there. After nearly a year (!) it's finished and I'm more than a little sad. When I started writing this I thought maybe it would be ten chapters, fifteen at the most but I had more to say then I thought I did, and the response I have gotten from day one has just been so positive I was blown away. Thank you to everyone who has taken time out of their day to leave me a kind word, it has meant so much to me.

I have a few more ideas brewing, so this isn't goodbye, just so long for now.

Thank you so much friends.