Chapter Text
Thomas Barrow was standing on a cold and windy railway station platform in York in the afternoon of some day between Christmas and New Year’s Eve and wondered if his life would ever be easy and predictable.
A few minutes ago he had returned from the best Christmas celebration he had ever been part of, in his entire life. He had been honoured to celebrate with the man he loved and his unbelievingly acceptable family. Even the bad weather in York and the prospect of returning to work in the evening couldn’t dampen his good mood.
He had kissed Richard in the hallway of his parents’ house under the mistletoe and no one even batted an eye.
All the way back to the station Richard had been humming Christmas songs and not even the grumpy ticket officer inside had been able to wipe the smile from Thomas’ face.
And then he stepped back outside, hat and tickets in his hand, coat still open and noticed who was standing right next to Richard on the platform.
His little brother Ethan, the chubby grinning boy, had grown into a man in his early thirties, who looked restless and tired and excited at the same time. Almost twenty years of silence and now here he was, talking to Richard like he was just some stranger on his way through the country looking for the right train.
This couldn’t be happening right now. Thomas had just spent a wonderful Christmas with Richard and his family and he had managed to avoid thinking of his own broken family rather well. And now here was his long lost brother, who hadn’t bothered to look for him all these years.
Thomas looked at Richard with a helplessness in his eyes that hopefully conveyed the fact that he was unable to deal with this right now. The shock simply ran too deep. And Richard, this kind, wonderful, beautiful man, stepped in and saved him from dealing with it.
At least until Ethan asked him who he was. And of course that was a dangerous question. Thomas didn’t know what Ethan knew. He had no idea why he was here, what their parents told him, why he wasn’t screaming insults right now. But what he knew for sure was that he couldn’t get Richard involved.
“He is a colleague.” Thomas said firmly, when he finally managed to find his voice. He was still staring at Ethan and now he stepped around Richard to get the man’s focus back on him. “And a friend.”
Ethan directed his grey eyes at Thomas and his gaze was unnerving. It were the same eyes he saw every morning in the mirror. How could this be the same small boy who had cried in Thomas arms when the neighbours’ boy had stolen his toys? How should he talk to someone he had last seen at the age of eight when he himself had not even been sixteen?
“What are you doing here?” Thomas asked because Ethan frowned now and he had to distract him from the fact that it was a few days after Christmas and he was wandering around the railway station in York with a man who was apparently his work colleague.
Ethan looked taken aback as if he was not sure how to react. “I was looking for you Thomas. I was on my way to Downton.”
“Why?” Thomas asked.
“You are my brother.” He replied simply as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. His gaze drifted to Richard. “Can we go somewhere to talk?”
Thomas hesitated. He didn’t want to deal with this now. He just wanted to get on that train with Richard. Work wasn’t the only reason why he wanted to get back to Downton as soon as possible. He would’ve never admitted it but he missed the people at Downton even if they had only been away for a few hours.
“I have to get back to work.” He said and pressed his lips together.
Ethan didn’t look happy. “I know this must seem as sudden to you as it seems to me, but I hoped we could perhaps talk about it?”
Thomas closed his eyes. Behind them the people on the platform began to board the train. Soon it would depart. He had to make a decision.
“We have to take this train.” He finally said with a long sigh. “But I suppose I cannot stop you, if you want to come.”
He looked at Richard who nodded with a small hesitating smile. So the valet was on his side. Good. Thomas could use all the support he would get.
Ethan nodded quickly and picked up his valise. “Let’s go then.”
Thomas shot him a last wary gaze before he pulled himself together. They climbed the stairs and closed the door behind them. The ticket officer looked at their tickets, frowned at the two crumbled pieces of paper Thomas showed him and then they made their way down the carriage.
It was fortunate that not many people decided to travel in this weather. The train was not even half-full. They found an empty compartment without any trouble.
Thomas immediately took one of the window seats and Richard took the seat next to him. Ethan slowly sat down opposite of them. His gaze was still directed at Richard as if he was wondering why the valet hadn’t excused himself in the politest way possible.
“I am sorry but shouldn’t we talk alone?” he asked carefully.
“He stays.” Thomas replied sharply.
Ethan arched a brow but nodded. Then he extended his hand to Richard. “I feel like we missed the opportunity for an introduction. I am Ethan Barrow.”
Richard smiled and shook the hand but he still looked like he was not sure what to think. “Richard Ellis.” He said. “Is it alright if I call you Ethan? I fear everything else would be confusing.”
Thomas snorted and Ethan laughed a bit nervously. “Of course, if I may call you Richard?”
Richard nodded and the train slowly started moving.
“Alright, enough of the pleasantries.” Thomas said and looked at his brother. “Why are you here?”
Ethan opened his mouth with a frown but Thomas shook his head. “I mean why now? What changed?”
For the fraction of a second Ethan looked uncomfortable but then his expression turned blank and he shook his head. “What changed?” he asked. “I haven’t seen you since I was eight, Thomas.”
“So?” Thomas arched a brow. “You didn’t care about that the last couple of years. Why do you want to see me now? I am sure our parents told you that this would be an awful idea.”
Ethan’s gaze wandered to Richard again. “Are you sure that we can’t talk in private somewhere?” he asked. “I don’t feel comfortable discussing this here.”
Richard got up from his seat with the help of his cane. Thomas could see that his knuckles had turned white around it. “I can leave you alone, if that is what you want.” He said but his gaze was only directed at Thomas.
Thomas shook his head immediately. “Sit down.” He said and had to suppress the panic in his voice. He needed Richard to be here right now. He couldn’t do this alone.
Then he looked at his brother. “He is a very good friend, Ethan. I trust him with my life. You can speak frankly in his presence.”
Richard sat down again, his hand was still cramped around his walking cane. Thomas knew him well enough to see the anxiousness behind the polite expression on his face. This could turn into an ugly conversation rather fast.
Ethan looked like he wanted to protest but decided against it after a few seconds. His hands fidgeted with his valise. “I thought you were dead.” He finally said.
“What?” Thomas snapped.
Ethan’s gaze drifted down to Thomas hand. He gestured at it. “A war wound?”
Thomas frowned but nodded after a moment. He didn’t reply anything. As always he didn’t like it when people paid attention to his hand.
His brother sighed. “They told me you died in the war.”
There was a short shocked silence. And then Thomas couldn’t suppress his laugh anymore. “Oh they did?” he asked with a big ironic smile. “I should’ve known.”
“Thomas…” Richard said concerned and looked like he wanted to touch Thomas but couldn’t.
“This is bloody hilarious.” Thomas snorted. “They used the one perfect solution to finally wipe me from their lives and memories. They simply pretended I died. That’s brilliant, Richard. I suppose no one in the neighbourhood even dared to mention the fact that I ever brought shame to their house after I died fighting for our country.”
Ethan narrowed his eyes. “This isn’t amusing.” He said. “First you just disappear and then they tell me you are dead. I lost my brother when I was eight years old, only to find out that he has been living here the whole time when I turned thirty. Do you think that was easy for me?”
Thomas stared at him. There were many unbelievable parts of this sentence, but only one that took his breath away. “Disappeared?” he asked quietly.
Ethan returned his gaze with confusion in his eyes. “Yes.” he said. “How would you call it when you wake up one morning and someone is simply gone? How would you feel if your brother decided to run away in the middle of the night without ever telling you the reason?”
Silence. Thomas stared at him and he suddenly realised how he misjudged his parents behaviour all these years. He had often imagined what might have happened after his father had found out about him, beaten him almost to death and thrown him out of the house in the middle of the night. He could still see his mother’s disappointed and his sisters’ disgusted gaze. Could still remember how he had been glad that Ethan was in bed, sleeping and not witnessing any of that.
He always thought they had told Ethan what happened. That they would tell him what happened to Thomas, if only to warn him from taking the same path. Not that they ever could understand that it wasn’t a choice for anyone.
But they hadn’t told his brother. He should’ve known. They kept it under wraps and they did with Thomas what they had done with every slightly abnormal occurrence since he had been a child. They avoided any thought of it, tried to bury it as deep as they could and used the first opportunity to declare him dead so they didn’t have to bother with the questions anymore.
“I didn’t run away.” Thomas said quietly because that was something he had to make abundantly clear. He did not want to tell Ethan about himself, but he could at least tell him the truth about his parents. “He beat me and threw me out of the house. She stood there and did nothing. Then they told you a lie story so they both could pretend that nothing happened. So they could pretend to have only one perfect son.”
Ethan’s eyes widened and he suddenly looked like the boy, Thomas had known all these years ago. “What?” he asked completely baffled.
Thomas didn’t reply. He looked out of the window and waited for the inevitable denial that would surely follow any second now. His brother had believed the lies for years. Why should he change his mind now.
A few more seconds of silence followed. “Why?” Ethan finally asked quietly. “Why would they do something like that?”
Thomas laughed bitterly. “They really didn’t tell you?”
“No. Like I said, I had no idea you were alive.” Ethan said with a deep breath. “A few weeks ago I was working on a case in York and read an advert for a vacant valet position in the paper. Your name was in it. I just thought the paper made a mistake or it was a different Thomas Barrow. Then I did some research and wondered if maybe the War Office made a mistake and wrongly declared you dead. But then…” he stopped speaking and shook his head.
“Case?” Thomas asked with a frown.
“I’m practising law.” Ethan replied and looked down at his hands that still clutched the valise. “That doesn’t matter right now. Tell me why they would do something like this. Why would they have lied to me for all these years?”
So he was a lawyer. Good for him.
Thomas clenched his jaw. “I can’t.” he said.
Ethan leant forward in his seat with narrowed eyes. “Why not?” he asked and now his voice was demanding. Thomas could suddenly imagine him in a court room. “What did you do that you deserved being thrown out of the house by dad? I know you never got along well with him. But this? You must’ve done something terrible.”
And this was apparently enough to eliminate the small amount of patience that Richard was still holding onto. “He did nothing wrong.” He snapped and his voice was icy. “Nothing. Your father is the one, who wronged Thomas. Your father is the villain in this story, even if you might not want to believe it.”
Thomas closed his eyes in defeat while Ethan stared at the valet in surprise.
“I don’t want to be impolite, Richard, but what do you know about this?” Ethan asked with a bit of annoyance in his voice.
“Enough.” Richard replied with a side glance at Thomas. “Enough to know that this was entirely your father’s fault.”
“I think I can judge that for myself.” Ethan replied curtly. “Thomas, I am not eight years old anymore. I deserve the truth. What is this all about?”
Thomas finally looked at him and made a decision. Ethan was right. He deserved the truth. On top of that Thomas had nothing to lose. If he told his brother and he was disgusted by him they would simply part ways. He had managed to live without Ethan for years. He grew up to believe that his brother hated him for who he was. There was no need to fear his reaction now. Nothing had changed.
“Do you remember Lewis McNally?” he asked nonchalantly.
Ethan frowned. “The boy from next door? He was a friend of yours wasn’t he? What has he to do with this?”
Thomas shot a look to the door of the compartment but it was still firmly closed and they were alone. “My so-called crime was to kiss him. And he caught us.” It was obvious who he meant with he. He just couldn’t call him father in this moment.
He almost felt Richard’s body tense next to him. Maybe the valet hadn’t expected, that Thomas would be this open.
There was a long silence in which Ethan simply looked at Thomas with a surprised expression on his face. Then his gaze wandered to Richard and his eyes widened slightly as if he had just realised what Thomas was implying.
“Yes. He is more than a colleague. More than a friend.” Thomas replied to the question marks on his face. “I don’t expect you to understand. No one ever does. I was not the one who owed you this explanation, but if they are too cowardly to give it to you, I suppose it has to be me who tells you the truth. You can go back to your life now without feeling guilty about anything. I don’t need a reminder of the past. I am good where I am right now.” He looked at Richard, who smiled at him. Thomas didn’t know what possessed him, but he had the sudden stupid urge to take Richard’s hand. And for once, he relented and did it.
It simply felt right in this moment.
Ethan didn’t reply. He stared at their joined hands. “You are…”
“Abnormal? A queer? A degenerate? A mistake of god?” Thomas asked bitterly. “It doesn’t matter what you want to call it, I heard it all before and I don’t care anymore.”
“Thomas, stop calling yourself that.” Richard said quietly but Thomas simply got to his feet and pulled the valet up as well.
“I think I am done now.” He said to his brother. “There is nothing else to say. I am glad that you have a good life, you should go back to it now.”
The train slowly approached Downton now. In a few minutes they would arrive at the station. Thomas let go of Richard’s hand and opened the door. He had planned on stepping out without another look at Ethan, but he didn’t get far. “Thomas.” His brother said and got up from his seat as well. He suddenly looked ten years older. “Mum died a couple of weeks ago.”
Thomas froze. A wave of mixed feelings crashed down on top of him, but he managed to suppress most of them. He didn’t turn around fully when he answered. “Am I supposed to care about that?”
“She cared about you.” Ethan said quietly. “She left me a letter. It was the final straw to convince me that I had to meet you. She told me you were alive and that she never regretted anything as much as not reaching out to you. She told me I should do it.”
“I highly doubt that she cared about me. And if she did, it’s a little late for regret. But I suppose you fulfilled her last wish, so you can sleep easier now.” Thomas said bitterly. He turned to Richard. “Let’s go?”
Richard looked undecided but only for a second. Then he nodded.
Thomas couldn’t keep himself from looking over his shoulder one last time. There was a painful gaze on Ethan’s face. “Thomas,” he said. “I am sorry, but-”
“I understand.” Thomas said and rubbed a hand over his face. He forced himself to be honest. “And you have nothing to be sorry for. It was never your fault. You were just a child.”
“And you weren’t?” Ethan asked with a grimace before he took a deep breath and shook his head. “I think I need time to process this but…can we talk later?”
And now it was Thomas, who shook his head. “I don’t think I can deal with this. And you don’t need me to bring chaos into your life, Ethan. Go back to it before it’s too late.”
And with that he finally turned around to Richard who nodded at Ethan one last time and followed Thomas into the corridor. Ethan didn’t try to stop them.
They departed the train in silence and walked the way through Downton in a matter of minutes. It slowly began to rain now. They didn’t meet a single person on the street. The weather was too terrible. The air was still cold and the wind got stronger every few steps but Thomas didn’t even notice it anymore. His body was numb.
“Thomas…” Richard finally whispered when they reached the safety of the woods around the Abbey. “Talk to me.”
Thomas stopped walking abruptly and stared down at his hands that were shaking. “My mother is dead, Richard.” He said quietly and without any emotion in his voice.
Richard looked around quickly before he took a step closer and pulled Thomas into a tight embrace.
Shudders went through Thomas body when he finally realised what had just happened. His hand clenched around Richard’s coat and his eyes were burning all of a sudden. He looked into Richard’s eyes. “My mother is dead…” he gasped out.
“I know.” Richard whispered and cupped his cheek with his hand. “I am here Thomas. It’s alright. Let go for a moment. You are allowed to feel like this.”
Thomas let out a shaky laugh. “But that’s just it, Richard.” He gasped and now tears streamed down his cheeks. “She is dead and I feel absolutely nothing.”
They must’ve stood there for an eternity. Thomas didn’t want to let go of Richard but the wind still kept getting stronger and it had begun to snow in the last few minutes.
“You know we don’t have to go back to the house.” Richard said finally and pulled away. “I am sure they would understand…”
Thomas took a shuddering breath and wiped with his sleeve over his eyes. “We told them we would be back in the evening. They will send someone for us if we don’t show up.”
The thought was annoying and calming at the same time. He knew that Phyllis wouldn’t rest until she was absolutely sure that they made it back safely from York. She had been especially agitated when they told her that they were taking the train.
“Fine.” Richard sighed and pulled his coat closer around his shoulders. “But let us hurry. I have the feeling that this blizzard is getting worse the longer we are out here.”
He wasn’t wrong with that. The snow was falling in big flakes now and it was more and more impossible to see through it.
They walked the rest of the way in silence. Thomas was glad about it. Even if they could’ve had a conversation in this storm, he wouldn’t have the faintest idea what to say. His feelings were a turmoil. Maybe Richard had been right. Maybe it would’ve been better to simply skip dinner at the Abbey and use the storm as an excuse. Well, it was too late now. They were almost at the house.
Richard’s hand was still clasped around Thomas’ and he didn’t let go, even when they stepped out of the woods and Downton Abbey slowly came into view.
It got more and more difficult to walk, the further they stepped onto the flat grounds around Downton Abbey. The trees had offered a bit of protection from the storm. Not anymore.
“We should get inside. Now!” Richard almost shouted against the wind and still his voice was barely audible.
“Good idea!” Thomas shouted back and held on to his hat with one hand before it could fly away. “Can you walk faster?”
Richard stared into the direction of the house, that was still a few hundred yards away and shook his head. “Probably not fast enough. I might need a little help.” He said with a sigh and Thomas barely understood him.
Thomas suppressed an eye-roll that no one would’ve seen. This man…
Instead he simply grabbed the walking cane from Richard’s hand and pulled his left arm over his own shoulder. “Lean on me, we are going to the front door. That’s closer.” He shouted and his lips were only inches from Richard’s ear.
The valet nodded tight-lipped and began to move. Thomas pulled him along, carrying half of his weight and they moved as fast as they could against the raging storm.
Thomas was glad that it was already dark enough that the lights of Downton Abbey were on. He was not sure if they would’ve been able to see the house through the snow if that hadn’t been the case.
They reached the front door a few minutes later and Thomas was suddenly aware that he couldn’t feel his hands anymore. The only warmth he was feeling came from Richard’s breath against the side of his neck and his left side where the other man’s body pressed against his.
Thomas pushed Richard into the shadow of the front entrance and banged his fist against the door. God, he hoped Andy would be somewhere around. It wouldn’t be ideal for the family to open the-
The door opened to the surprised faces of Lord Grantham and Mr. Talbot and Thomas just managed to think of course when Richard’s leg gave way and he had to catch the valet before he could bash his head in against the doorframe.
“Dear Lord, Barrow!” Lord Grantham gasped and immediately made a step to the side when a gust of cold wind entered the entrance hall and threw snow in his face. “Get inside!”
Easier said than done. Richard was shaking now and Thomas’ fingers were so numb that he couldn’t hold on to the walking cane that clattered to the stone floor only seconds later.
Fortunately Mr. Talbot and Lord Grantham were perceptive enough to notice the dilemma and act accordingly.
Before Thomas could do anything else the Earl had made a step into the cold, grabbed him by the arm and dragged him inside the entrance hall. At the same time Mr. Talbot pulled Richard’s left arm over his shoulder and a few seconds later the front door was slammed shut and everyone was breathing heavily.
Thomas managed to catch himself against the banister of the stairway, but his legs were shaking so badly that he had to sit down on the steps after a moment of hesitation. Lord Grantham’s hand was still on his shoulder. “What on earth were you still doing out there, Barrow?” the Earl asked and watched as his son-in-law slowly lowered Richard to the ground. “We thought you would have had the sense to stay in York given the dangerous nature of this blizzard.”
Thomas didn’t hear him. His eyes were directed at Richard, whose face had an unhealthy pallor. “Are you alright?” he asked the valet and it was difficult to talk and keep his teeth from chattering at the same time.
“Fine.” Richard managed to get out and grimaced, one hand was massaging his injured leg. He looked up at Mr. Talbot and Lord Grantham who were still frowning at both of them, probably not sure what to do. “We didn’t expect that the weather would take such a sudden turn. We wanted to be back before dinner.”
“Well, that was careless.” Mr. Talbot said with a worried shake of his head. “Something could’ve happened out there. The woods are not safe tonight.”
As if on cue a lightning strike illuminated the entire entrance hall and immediately after followed a loud clap of thunder that made them all wince. The storm must’ve been right on top of them now. Thomas was glad that they got back to the house just in time.
“I think it might be best if you stayed here tonight. These blizzards are unpredictable. They come so sudden that, one could freeze to death out there without even noticing.” Lord Grantham said resolutely, picked up the walking cane and handed it to Richard. “And you should probably get a cup of tea from Mrs. Patmore.”
Thomas slowly managed to get to his feet. “Thank you. And I will see to the dinner preparations…as soon as I feel my hands again.”
Mr. Talbot immediately shook his head. “You will do no such thing. Let Andy handle the dinner. You need to warm up. I can almost hear your teeth chattering from here.”
Thomas chose to ignore the advice and instead took off his gloves. He grimaced. His right hand was pins and needles and he could barely move the left one. Great. “Can you stand up?” he asked Richard who was still sitting on the floor with a pained expression on his face. The running and the cold had apparently not been good for his leg.
“Probably.” He replied. “With a little help.”
“I will call Andrew up.” Lord Grantham said and made a step into the direction of the library but Mr. Talbot was faster.
“Nonsense. I’ll help you downstairs.” He said and bent down to pull Richard’s arm over his shoulder again. Richard seemed to suppress any protests. He simply took deep laboured breaths and allowed that his employer pulled him to his feet with the additional help of the walking cane.
“Do you need help?” Thomas asked immediately.
Mr. Talbot shook his head. “It’s alright, but could you open the door?”
He pulled open the green baize door and Richard smiled reassuringly at him one more time before the two of them slowly began to make their way down the stairs.
Thomas just wanted to follow when Lord Grantham’s voice interrupted his line of thought. “Barrow?”
He turned around and arched a questioning brow at the Earl. “Yes, your Lordship?”
Lord Grantham looked a bit uncomfortable, which was still happing from time to time. The Earl was really trying to be more open. Thomas knew it wasn’t easy. He himself still felt reluctant to speak what was on his mind in the presence of his employer. “I hope you somehow managed to have a pleasant day in York before this blasted blizzard decided to make an appearance?”
Thomas blinked at him, but he held back the hysteric laugh that was threatening to bubble out. “Yes, it was a pleasant day.” Which was technically true when he didn’t consider his brother, who had suddenly appeared out of nowhere and told him that his mother was dead. This was nothing he should discuss with his employer. Everything before that unfortunate meeting had been pleasant, so he wasn’t even lying.
“I am glad to hear that.” Lord Grantham said with a small smile before he turned around to step into the library. “Now get a cup of tea, Barrow, and do something about that hand of yours. That is an order.”
Thomas stared at him in open surprise. “That hand, Milord…?” he asked because surely the Earl couldn’t have noticed anything about his war wound could he?
Lord Grantham looked at the hand in question and there was some kind of deep understanding in his gaze. “Scars always act up in the cold. You should be careful with that. Massaging it will probably help. And I am sure Daisy already lit a fire in the servants hall.”
And before Thomas could do more than stare at the man with an open mouth, the Earl had already turned around and vanished through the library doors.
Thomas shook his head in silent wonder. It was strange that a man who he had known all his life was still capable of surprising him sometimes. A few years back the Earl would never have thought about something like this and in absolutely no case would he have vocalised it.
Maybe it was time to heed Lord Grantham’s advice. A cup of tea sounded like a great idea.
Richard bit back his protests when Henry decided to help him down to the servants hall. His leg was hurting again and his teeth were still chattering. He had no energy left to argue.
The way down the stairs was slow and strenuous and he was glad when they finally reached the bottom.
“You can let go of me now.” Richard said and supported himself against the wall.
Henry didn’t reply but after a moment of hesitation he nodded and made a step back. Richard managed to keep himself on his feet with the help of the wall and the walking cane, which was ridiculous in itself, but for some reason he was immensely proud of it.
Andy suddenly appeared next to them. “What happened?” the footman asked with a concerned look at Richard.
“The blizzard. Richard is not feeling well and Thomas shouldn’t have to deal with the dinner right now. Are you up for it, Andy? And do you know where Daisy is? I wanted to ask her for some tea.” Henry said without hesitation and ignored every single convention by calling every one of them by their Christian names. This man…Richard thought not for the first time.
Andy’s expression would’ve been hilarious in every other situation. “Of course Mr. Talbot. And Daisy is in the kitchen.”
Henry nodded gratefully. “Excellent. Why don’t you check if all the windows are closed? We wouldn’t want this blizzard to wreak even more havoc than it already did, would we?” He looked at Richard. “Wait here for a second?”
The former racing driver didn’t even wait for a reply. He was already on his way to the kitchen.
Andy shot another curious look at Richard before he excused himself and disappeared to start with the dinner preparations.
Richard sighed deeply and leant his back against the wall. He was exhausted. Today had been a chaos of feelings. And Thomas must feel even worse. It was not Richard’s brother who had shown up out of the blue to tell him that he had believed he was dead for years, and his mother had passed away a few weeks ago. How on earth should he comfort Thomas in such an impossible situation? And couldn’t this have happened on any other day? Richard had the feeling that Thomas had just accepted, that he was a part of his family. And now here was his own, reminding him once again, what he was missing.
“Richard?”
Henry was back.
“Mmm?” Richard got out without looking at the other man.
“Let’s get you to the butler’s pantry. I told Daisy to light a fire and bring you tea. Thomas should be downstairs in a minute.”
He only nodded as a reply and the next thing he knew was, that his wet coat was pushed from his shoulders and he could finally sit down in a chair.
“Do you need anything for your leg?” Henry asked when Richard grimaced at the pain.
Richard shook his head. “It’s just the cold. It should get better as soon as I warmed up a bit.”
As if on cue Daisy was suddenly there to put a blanket over his legs and a cup of tea in his hands. “What were you even doing out there in this weather? Everyone else went home early because of the storm. Andy and I are the only ones who stayed.” she said with an incredulous shake of her head. “You should’ve spent the night in York at your parents’ house.”
Richard only sighed, already tired of the argument. But he also knew that Daisy only meant well, so he decided to give her a reply. “We were distracted. We didn’t notice the storm until we had already made it back to Downton.”
“Fools.” Daisy said but her voice was soft. “Where is he anyway?”
“On his way.” Henry interjected with a pointed glance at Daisy. “And we all agree this was foolish, but I don’t think this is the time to blame anyone.”
“Of course Mr. Talbot.” Daisy said immediately and now she sounded a bit sheepish. She stoked up the fire one more time before she left.
Richard took a sip from his tea and sighed relieved. The warmth immediately made him feel better.
“Are you alright?” Henry asked, still standing next to him, apparently not sure what to do. “Thomas seemed shaken and I don’t think it was because of the blizzard.”
Richard wondered faintly why the other man kept asking him questions that no normal person, least of all an employer, would want an answer for. He closed his eyes for a moment and didn’t say anything.
“Was it your family? Did something happen?” Henry was apparently still not content to leave.
“No, it wasn’t my family.” Richard muttered with a shake of his head. “It was…” his family. He cleared his throat. No, he couldn’t talk about this right now. “I am sorry, I think I need a minute.”
Henry’s expression turned sympathetic. He still looked curious, but he didn’t press. “Of course. You don’t need to tell me. Just rest a while.”
Richard managed a nod before he let his head sink back against the chair and closed his eyes.
He heard how Henry stepped out of the room. “Oh good you are here.” His voice sounded a moment later. “He is in there.”
“Mr. Talbot.” Thomas replied and there was something in his voice that sounded like reluctant gratefulness. Richard knew that it was still difficult for the butler to accept Henry’s refusal to acknowledge any social conventions. “Thank you for helping him.”
“No problem at all.” The former racing driver replied. “Can I trust that you will both stay here tonight? I really don’t want to organise a search party in the middle of the night.”
A clap of thunder interrupted Thomas’ reply. Both of them were silent for a few seconds.
“I appreciate the concern, but I can assure you, we are not stupid enough to go out there again tonight, Mr. Talbot.” Thomas replied dryly. “If you would excuse me now?”
Henry muttered a reply that Richard didn’t understand and then the door to the butler’s pantry was finally pushed open and Thomas appeared.
“He only meant well.” Richard said as soon as the butler had closed the door behind himself.
Thomas only shrugged. He still looked pale and there were dark circles beneath his eyes. He slowly peeled his wet coat from his shoulders and hung it up next to the door before he took the chair next to Richard. “How is your leg?” he asked and he examined Richard’s face as if he was looking for signs of pain.
Richard smiled faintly. “Slowly warming up. How is your hand?” Of course he had noticed how Thomas took off his coat with only his right hand. He wasn’t blind. Thomas’ war wound was always bothering him in the cold. Why should it be any different right now?
Thomas sighed and didn’t even try to deny it. “If I could feel it right now it would probably hurt like hell.” He admitted.
Richard placed his cup of tea onto the floor next to his chair, before he took Thomas left hand between his and slowly began to pull off the glove. It took a while because of the stiffness of the muscles but he managed it in the end and rubbed Thomas hand between his to warm it up. He knew the ropes by now.
“You don’t have to do that.” Thomas said with a frown.
“I know.” Richard replied quietly without stopping. “But I want to.”
Thomas leant back in his chair and left him to it. He closed his eyes and let out a relieved sigh. “Thank you.” He muttered under his breath.
“Do you want to talk about your family?” Richard asked after a few seconds of silence.
Thomas didn’t pull his hand back but Richard could feel him flinch, which was a sure sign that he had been tempted for a split second.
“What is there to talk about?” he finally said with a bitter tone in his voice.
“Please don’t play this down, Thomas.” Richard replied. “I know you are hurting.”
Thomas opened his eyes abruptly and there was anger in them. “And what if I am? It isn’t as if my family has never hurt me before. This isn’t exactly a new development.”
“Your brother seemed alright.” Richard said hesitatingly. “And he didn’t immediately insult or report us when you told him about us.”
Thomas snorted. “I wouldn’t bet on it. He could still report us. Didn’t you hear him say, that he is a lawyer?”
For some reason there wasn’t as much concern in Thomas’ voice as Richard would’ve expected with such a topic. He had noticed that something in Thomas had changed in the last few weeks. Maybe it had been a side effect of the encounter with the Duke and Mr. Howell. Maybe it was their brush with the police and death itself.
Whatever it was, Thomas seemed more reluctant than ever to hide who they were. The fact that he immediately told his brother about them, only proved that. Richard was not sure what he should think about that. He himself felt more confident since they were both working in a house, where everyone knew and no one cared about their relationship. But that didn’t mean that he was not painfully aware of the fact, that any stranger on the street could report them to the police, if they gave them the right reason.
“He didn’t seem like someone who would do something like this.” Richard said slowly when he surfaced from his thoughts and remembered what Thomas said last. “And you forget that he thought you were dead for years. He was shocked to see you there. I am sure he needs time to comprehend all of this. He will come round.”
Thomas pinched the bridge of his nose with his right hand while his left one was still resting between Richard’s hands. “I honestly don’t know if I want him to, Richard.”
Richard stared at him in surprise. He had of course been present when Thomas told his brother, that he should live his own life, but he had thought that had only been a defence mechanism to get out of a conversation he wasn’t comfortable with.
“Why?” Richard asked quietly.
Thomas looked as if he would like the floor to swallow him whole. “If he comes round, he’ll want to meet me again. And if we meet and he should for some ludicrous reason decide to accept who I am, sooner or later he will insist that I try to put things right with the rest of my family and I don’t want-“ his voice broke at the word and he shook his head. “I can’t do that.” There was desperation in his eyes when he looked back at Richard. “I never want to go back to Manchester. I never want to meet my father again. I never want to see the sister, who showed me nothing but disgust. I don’t want to-”
“Thomas, don’t go there.” Richard said and reached out for him before he could say anymore and pulled him into a strong hug. “I understand. And you don’t have to do any of that. You never have to meet them again, if you don’t want to.” He whispered in Thomas hair.
The butler took a deep breath and buried his face against Richard’s shoulder. “I just want to forget them.” He muttered. “I loved spending time with your family today. And it showed me once again, that I don’t want to see mine ever again.”
“And your mother?” Richard asked quietly.
Thomas pulled back and wiped with his sleeve over his eyes. There was bitterness in his gaze. “I shouldn’t shed a tear for her. She was cold and distant in every single memory I have of her. She never hugged me or supported me. Never seemed to care about what I did at all. She never had any expectations. Not even the ones I couldn’t have met anyways. She was the exact opposite of my father in that regard. He had so many expectations…”
Richard squeezed his arm. “Your siblings…was she any different with them?”
Thomas shook his head. “Not that I know of. She treated them exactly the same. I think she gave up long before we even existed. Her mistake was marrying my father. He broke her heart, if she even had one in the first place.”
“I am so sorry.” Richard said and couldn’t keep his voice from shaking. “I can’t even imagine how hard growing up in a family like that could’ve been for you.”
Thomas suddenly looked up and cupped Richard’s face with his hand. There was determination in his eyes. The anger was completely gone. “And I am so glad about that, Richard. You have a wonderful family and today I saw again how they all support you. I could never say the same about mine and sometimes I cannot understand it, but I am so grateful that every single one of them loves you the way they do. What your mother did because of Alice is incredible. And your sister even took a gamble and let you plan her wedding.”
Richard frowned. “She told you about that?” he asked a bit annoyed. Why was Ginny so nosy all the time? He was not sure how to feel about the fact that Thomas knew that particular story. It seemed far too close to their conversations about weddings. A subject they both were not ready for.
Thomas smiled. “Yes. And I think what you did with it was wonderful.”
“I have my moments.” Richard replied with a faint smile and decided that humour was the best way to deal with an uncomfortable topic. On top of that the thought of Thomas’ mother was still at the back of his mind and he couldn’t let the subject go just yet. “You will always be a part of my family. And if they haven’t told you that already, you can always go there if you need anything.”
Thomas’ breath hitched but there was the beginning of an incredulous smile on his face now. “They have told me. Several times.”
Of course. He had expected that. “Good.” Richard said. He hesitated a few seconds. “I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but I think you should give your brother a chance, should he change his mind and show up again.”
“You are rather optimistic that he will…” Thomas muttered with a doubtful look.
Richard didn’t hesitate this time. “He came all this way to look for you, even though he thought you left him when he was a child. I don’t think that such a miniscule matter will scare him off completely.”
Thomas arched a brow at him. “Did you just call our relationship a miniscule matter?” he asked.
Richard kissed him as a reply. “Of course not.” He said with a smile when he pulled back. “I was merely talking about the blizzard.”
The wind was howling outside. Every few minutes lightning and a loud clap of thunder reminded them that the storm was still raging. The snow had turned into a mixture of rain and icy crystals that drummed against the windows of the dining room with a strength that almost shook the glass.
“I hate thunder.” Andy said after another especially loud sound made him wince. Fortunately he managed not to drop the stack with plates he was balancing right now.
Mrs. Patmore had asked her to prepare a small dinner before she left for her cottage and Daisy was glad for it. She always felt better when she could cook something on her own for a change.
It was a strange night. Everyone had left early because of the blizzard. Mr. Barrow and Mr. Ellis had returned from York, looking quite shaken. And now here she was, helping Andy with the dinner preparations.
Daisy brought her tray with wine glasses to the table and stepped closer to the nearest window to look outside. She couldn’t even see further than a few yards. Rain and ice obscured everything, from the trees at the edge of the estate, over the stone folly that she was absolutely sure she could’ve seen on a clear day, up to the bed of flowers directly next to the front door. “I used to like storms when I was younger.” She said quietly. “I thought they were exciting. The power in those gusts of wind. The rain. The lightning. I always wanted to run through the rain and no one would’ve been able to see or stop me.”
She felt Andy’s surprised look at the back of her head and turned around to smile at him. To her surprise there was already a small worried smile on his face. “I think I understand what you mean. But please don’t go out there now, Daisy. It’s dangerous.”
She rolled her eyes. “I know that, you fool. I was talking about summer storms. Not full-blown blizzards. I don’t want to freeze to death.”
He let out a sound that was somewhere between a snort and a laugh before he gestured to the door. “You may not be able to run through the rain, but I could use some help running through the house. I think there could still be some windows open upstairs. Mr. Talbot told me to check.”
Daisy’s eyes widened. “And you were waiting to tell me that until now?”
Andy shrugged a bit sheepishly. “I had to prepare everything for the dinner and forgot. I just remembered.”
Oh well. If there were any precious rugs or furniture that were getting soaked right this second, it was probably too late for them anyways. “Alright.” She said and rubbed her hands together in anticipation. “You’ll take the ground floor, I’ll start on the second floor. We meet in the middle. The person who finds the most open windows wins. Loser has to tell Lord Grantham what damage the storm has already done.”
Andy grinned. “Deal.” He said. “I’ll even give you a head start to get to the second floor.”
Daisy smirked at him and rolled up her sleeves. “I won’t need it.” And she was out of the dining room faster than he could blink.
She ran up the stairs, taking two steps at a time. On the first landing she passed an amused Lady Mary who was just descending the stairway. “Is the house on fire, Daisy?” she asked dryly.
“No, Milady! Just closing all the windows!” Daisy shouted over her shoulder and ran past her without stopping.
She reached the second floor in no time and threw open the first guest room door, just when another clap of thunder echoed around the house. She didn’t even turn on a light. The lightning was bright enough to show her that all the windows were closed in this room.
“Bollocks.” She muttered under her breath and the thought that she was hoping for the wrong outcome here, crossed her mind for a split second, before she decided to ignore it. This was a game and she refused to lose.
Daisy quickly closed the door she had just opened and pulled open the next one. She had never even counted the rooms in this house. She only knew there were far too many if someone was given the task to light all the fireplaces.
Maybe it hadn’t been the best idea to start on the second floor. They hardly used the rooms up here these days. On the other hand Elisabeth had been dusting and airing out this floor yesterday and the girl almost always forgot to close a window.
The next room brought her luck. One of the three windows was hanging wide open, the curtains were already soaked and there was a wet spot on the rug, but fortunately no furniture or paintings anywhere in its close vicinity.
Daisy quickly closed it, tried to memorise the room, so she could tell Mrs. Hughes about it later and continued her search.
Not only five minutes later she met Andy in the middle of the first floor with only three doors left between them. They both stopped and took a moment to catch their breath. She was proud to say that he looked more winded than she felt.
“How many did you find?” she asked when the air had returned to her lungs.
He held up four fingers.
“Blast it.” She muttered. “I only got three.”
And straightened himself up and grinned. “Thank god. The window in Lady Grantham’s sitting room was open and I think the rain ruined the couch.”
Daisy groaned, not happy about the fact that she would be the one to bring the Earl’s wife the news. “Fantastic.” She said and gestured to the three remaining doors. “Do you want to have the honour?”
Andy immediately shook his head. “I left these for you. I think the Dowager has one of those rooms but I can’t remember which one.”
Daisy suppressed a laugh. Of course. “Are you afraid of Lord Grantham’s mother, Andy?” she asked.
He looked at her as if she was speaking gibberish. “Who isn’t? She is terrifying!”
“I never thought she was scary. Maybe a bit blunt, but that doesn’t harm anyone.” Daisy said seriously before she tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her left ear. “Alright, I’ll open these for you, but if I find two more open windows I’ll win.”
Andy grumbled something that sounded slightly like agreement, so she opened the first door without a knock. She remembered exactly which room the Dowager had moved into when she arrived to recover from her flue before Christmas. It was the one with the best view at the Eastern corner of the house. She apparently liked watching the sun rise in the morning.
Unfortunately in the first empty room the windows were all closed but the second room, which was Lady Edith’s old room, greeted her with the loud howling of the wind. “Ha!” Daisy laughed and Andy said something she couldn’t understand because of the racket outside.
She closed the window and turned around with an arched brow. “What?”
“It’s a tie.” He said. “We both got four. Who has to tell them now?”
Daisy smirked and walked past him swiftly. “I still have one room left.”
She didn’t hear Andy’s doubtful reply when she rapped with her knuckles against the one remaining door.
“Milady?” she asked loudly when no one answered after a few seconds.
Andy shot her a concerned look. “Maybe she already went downstairs?”
Daisy shook her head with a frown. “I don’t think so. You didn’t ring the bell yet and she is always punctual.” She knocked again. Still no reply.
“I am going in.” she said after a moment of hesitation. Maybe she was sleeping…
“Are you sure that is a good idea?” Andy asked faintly but Daisy had already pushed open the door.
“Milady, I am coming in.” she said and braced herself for whatever she would see. The woman was old and she hadn’t been well these past days. Daisy tried to ignore the thought but she couldn’t suppress it.
The first thing she noticed was that the room was dark. Not a single lamp was on.
She pushed the door open a bit further and slowly stepped inside. As soon as her eyes adjusted to the dark Daisy took a deep relived breath. The old Lady Grantham was standing next to one of the windows. She was already dressed for dinner and one of her hands gripped her walking cane, the other was holding back the curtain. The window was open. It appeared Daisy had won the game. The thought was immediately drowned out by her common sense.
“Milady?” Daisy said shocked and took a step closer. “You can’t have the window open in this storm!”
And finally the older woman seemed to notice that she wasn’t alone anymore. She looked over her shoulder but Daisy couldn’t see the expression on her face in the dark. “Ah, Mrs. Mason.” She said and her tone was not surprised at all. “Would you come over here for a minute?”
Daisy blinked at her and shot a look over her shoulder to make sure that Andy was still there and she didn’t imagine this scene. He looked just as puzzled as she felt.
Slowly she made her way over to the window and immediately pulled the sleeves of her dress down again. Even a yard away she still got goosebumps from the cold wind.
“Please close the window, Milady. You are still not fully recovered from your flu. This is dangerous. You could-” She said but stopped abruptly when Violet Crawley made an impatient gesture and pointed out of the window.
“Oh stop making a fuss, girl. We are British. If we cannot borne a bit of a drizzle we haven’t earned our right to live in this country.”
A bit of a drizzle…Daisy thought shocked. Well, the Dowager was older than anyone else in this house. Who knew how many storms she had seen in her life.
“Look out there and tell me if you see something as well.” Daisy could hear the annoyed tone in her voice even over the sound of the wind.
She sighed inwardly but took a step closer and looked out of the window. A gust of wind immediately threw rain in her face. Fantastic.
“What do you mean, Milady? I see nothing.” She said and squinted to discern something outside.
“Not in that direction. Over there by the trees.” The dowager said impatiently and gestured again. “I might be old but my eyes are still sharp. There is a motorcar over there. And unless I am very much mistaken, it is not one of ours.”
“A car?” Daisy asked puzzled and her eyes almost watered from the effort. Was that a shape of something at the edge of the estate? She couldn’t tell. It might’ve been a tree or a bush. “I am sorry I don’t see anything, Milady. It’s impossible to make out anything at this distance and in the rain. But I really think we should close the window now.”
The Dowager stared out of the window for a few more seconds before she snorted and shook her head. “Oh well,” she said and stepped back so Daisy could finally close the window. “I suppose whoever is foolish enough to be outside in this weather, will come knocking sooner or later. No reason to send someone out right now.”
Daisy wiped the wetness from her face with the sleeve of her dress. “You just called it a drizzle, Milady.” She couldn’t hold herself back.
The Dowager smiled and her gaze drifted back outside. “It takes a few weeks in Russia before you are truly able to cherish the English weather. Rest assured, the worst blizzard this country has seen is still a far cry from the Siberian winter.”
“You’ve been to Russia, Milady?” Daisy asked interested.
The dowager’s smile suddenly got nostalgic. There was something in her gaze that was almost longing. “I knew someone there. A very long time ago, when your generation was not even born.”
They all were silent for a moment but it wasn’t uncomfortable, which should’ve been a miracle.
And then the Dowager seemed to surface from her thoughts and looked from Daisy to Andy with an arched brow as if she just realised that the kitchen maid and the footman were standing in her room.
“What exactly are you two doing here?” she asked and fortunately her voice didn’t sound angry, merely astounded.
Andy looked frightened anyways. “The dinner is almost ready, Milady.” He muttered and stared down at his shoes.
Violet Crawley looked at him over the tip of her proud nose. “Well then I suppose you are both needed downstairs? Or are you hiding a tray somewhere behind your back and I don’t have to go to the bother of walking down the stairs?”
Andy’s face turned red in a matter of seconds.
“I am afraid not, Milady.” Daisy interjected quickly and pulled Andy in the direction of the door. “Please excuse us. We will ring the bell in a moment.”
“Fantastic, I am quite famished.” The dowagers voice followed them outside and then they were standing in the corridor and stared at each other.
“What on earth was that about?” Andy asked immediately and frowned.
“I don’t know.” Daisy replied with a shrug. “But do you know what I just realised?”
He looked at her with a questioning gaze.
She grinned and started walking down the corridor in the direction of the stairs. She still had to add a few finishing touches to the dinner. “I won the game.”
Andy’s groan was the best reward she could’ve hoped for.
It didn’t surprise him, when Thomas decided to get out of his chair ten minutes later.
“I cannot leave the dinner to Andy. He had to stand in for me enough times already. How would it look, if the butler was barely doing his job in this house?” he replied when Richard protested.
This couldn’t be the only reason. Richard knew Thomas was caring more about Andy’s sanity and less about the families thoughts on the matter. Of course Thomas would’ve never admitted that.
Richard suppressed another protest and sighed. “Do you need help with anything?”
“No.” came the expected reply and before he could stand up as well, Thomas had put his hands on his shoulders and pushed him back down. “You rest.”
Why was he always so thoughtful? Richard would’ve protested a bit more if his leg hadn’t been so useless right now. Additionally he felt as if he could fall asleep right then and there.
“Did I ever tell you that your frown is adorable?” Thomas asked a second later with a barely suppressed smile. The butlers hands were still on Richard’s shoulders.
“No. Did I ever tell you that your bullheadedness is dangerous?” he replied without batting an eye at Thomas’ distraction attempt.
“A few times. I suppose you just have to remind me of it from time to time.” Thomas said before he bent down and gave Richard a quick but gentle kiss onto the forehead.
It was such an unexpected gesture that Richard could only stare after him until the door to the butler’s pantry closed behind him.
“How is he real?” he muttered under his breath.
Of course he hadn’t missed that Thomas had avoided to talk about his family more than absolutely necessary. Richard could see the pain they had caused in his eyes and that he didn’t know what to do about it, only made the whole situation worse.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. They would get through this together. They had been through worse.
The telephone on the butler’s desk rang loudly and he flinched.
Even though he knew the Duke was dead, he was still expecting his voice every time he heard this sound. He couldn’t even imagine how Thomas must feel.
Richard shook his head. This was ridiculous. It was just a phone.
He grabbed the receiver before it could ring a third time.
“Downton Abbey, Richard Ellis speaking.” He answered and faintly wondered whose business was important enough to call during a blizzard.
To his utter surprise it was his fathers’ voice. “Oh thank god! You made it back!”
“Dad?” Richard asked completely baffled. “Why are you calling? Did something happen?”
His father laughed but Richard could hear his worry behind it. “Did you take a look outside? We were so worried that you didn’t make it back. I didn’t even know if it would work. The neighbours phone line is dead.”
Richard put his hand over his eyes. Of course. He should’ve expected that his parents would worry. It showed him once again how different his family was from Thomas’. As if he had needed any more proof right now.
“We are fine.” He said and tried to sound as reassuring as he could. “We made it back to the Abbey in time. Only got a bit cold and wet but I already had a cup of tea. Tell Mum she doesn’t have to worry.”
His father let out something that sounded like a relieved breath. “Good.” There was a small pause. “I am sorry. I didn’t want to make a fuss. I didn’t think that you couldn’t handle the train ride. I know you are an adult and I don’t need to make sure that you arrive safely at home every single time. It’s just-“
“Dad.” Richard interrupted him and he had to keep his voice from shaking. “It’s alright. I am glad you called.”
There was another short silence between them. “Alright.” His father’s voice was quiet.
Richard was suddenly reminded of all the times he had come home late in his youth and his father had always been there to wait until he stumbled through the back door. He had never been there to scold him. Just to make sure that he returned safely.
“I suppose I should let you rest now. I don’t want to bother you.” Jacob Ellis added a few seconds later.
“Wait.” Richard said before he could hang up on him. “There is something else…”
He took a deep breath and knew that his father was waiting for him to continue.
“We met Thomas’ brother at the railway station in York.” He said with a quick look to the door, that was still closed.
A short silence followed. “What happened?” his father finally said.
Richard closed his eyes. His hand cramped around the receiver. “Thomas told him about us.”
And there was the worry again. “Richard…”
“It’s fine, Dad.” Richard said quickly. “I think…”
“You think?”
There was something in his tone that almost sounded like anger. Maybe Richard had imagined it.
“He didn’t seem as if he would report us.” Richard added reassuringly. “Of course, he was shocked. But he was more shocked to see Thomas alive.”
More silence on the other end.
Richard wondered if it had been a mistake to tell his father about this.
“Dad?” he asked hesitatingly.
“I am here.” The reply came with a deep sigh. “You have to be careful. I am incredibly happy for you that all the people at Downton Abbey seem to be so accepting, but please don’t expect that from everyone. You shouldn’t let your guard down.”
“I am not doing that.” Richard said and forced himself to remain calm. He knew his father meant well. He knew the older man was simply worrying about all the dangerous situations his son was getting himself into. “This was Thomas’ choice and I think he made the right one. I don’t think his brother will tell anyone.”
“You can never know what people will do, Richard.” His father said without any emotion in his voice. “Even when they were once part of his family.”
Richard blinked away the tears that suddenly filled his eyes. “And still it feels good to risk it from time to time. They tend to surprise us.”
His father didn’t seem to have a reply to that. “Is Thomas alright?” he asked finally. “How is he faring with this?”
Richard laughed bitterly. “In his own way. But at least he talked to me about it a little.”
“That’s good. You know what your mother always says: communication is the key-“
“-in every healthy relationship.” Richard interrupted him with an incredulous shake of his head. “I know dad. I lived in a house with the two of you for more than sixteen years.”
He could practically hear his father’s smile through the phone. “I am glad you listened to something we said. But then again, it has always been your sister who had problems with men.”
Richard tried to suppress his eye-roll but it was difficult.
Before he could say anything else there was a short knock on the butlers pantry’s door.
“I have to go, Dad.” He said.
“Oh, alright.” His father said with a bit of disappointment in his voice, that Richard didn’t understand because he had just seen him a few hours ago. “Be careful, will you?”
“Always.” He replied seriously before he hung up and turned to the door. “Come in.”
The door opened and to his surprise it wasn’t Thomas or Henry who stepped inside.
Instead a bulky man in a drenched coat entered the room. There was an unlit cigar between his lips and his cap was pulled deep into his eyes. He looked as if he had just spend hours standing in the rain. His shoes made a squishing sound with every step.
Richard slowly got up from his chair and frowned at the newcomer. “Who are you? How did you get in here?”
He had never seen the man before and it was not every day that strangers simply walked through the backdoor of Downton Abbey.
“Evenin’.” The man said without giving a direct reply to the question. “The back door was open and there was no one in the kitchen. I thought I would find somebody in the butlers pantry. Are you the butler of the house?”
Richard slowly stepped around the desk and looked the man up and down. For some reason he suddenly had a bad feeling. Maybe it was the way the stranger moved, as if he was preparing for a fight. Maybe it was his way of talking, that told Richard that he wasn’t from around here and had probably driven a long way from wherever he came from in the middle of a blizzard. Maybe it was the fact that Richard couldn’t see his eyes. He only knew that something was off about him.
“I am not the butler. What did you say your name was?” he asked and tried to sound polite which was difficult when he didn’t know who he was talking to.
“Jackson.” The man replied, which could’ve been his first or his last name and didn’t help at all to bring order into Richard’s confusing thoughts.
“What is your business here, Mr. Jackson?” Richard asked and his gaze wandered to the door. Everyone else was apparently still somewhere upstairs. “What do you want?”
“To talk to the butler.” The man replied with something that could count as a crooked smile.
“He isn’t available at the moment. You can talk to me about your business as well. My name is Mr. Ellis, I am a valet.” Somehow he didn’t want Thomas to meet this man.
The grin on the other man’s face turned into something else. It almost looked feral. He showed a row of silver teeth with it.
“Alright, Mr. Ellis.” Jackson said. “I am looking for information about the Duke of Crowborough and was told that the people in this house could help me with my inquiries.”
A cold shiver immediately went down Richard’s spine and he couldn’t keep his hands from shaking all of a sudden.
Who was this man? What did he want? Was he a business partner of the Duke, or somebody who worked for him, or maybe even a rival’s henchman? He didn’t look like someone the Duke would be friends with.
Richard’s thoughts wandered in three different directions at the same time. Three different voices began to tell him what to do. One voice told him to keep silent and get rid of this man as quickly as possible. The second one told him to lie and tell the man that he knew nothing about the Duke.
In the end Richard listened to the third one for a simple reason. He wanted to see the other man’s reaction to the news. It would undoubtedly tell him what kind of relationship he had with the Duke.
“He died a few weeks ago.” Richard replied curtly.
The man didn’t even flinch. The grin didn’t vanish from his face. He also didn’t say anything as a reply.
“That is why you are here, isn’t it?” Richard asked and could barely banish the anxiousness from his voice. “Unfortunately I cannot help you. I didn’t know the Duke at all.”
Jackson turned around suddenly and directed his gaze into the fireplace. He watched the flames for a few seconds before he replied. “He was here before his death, wasn’t he.” he asked and it didn’t sound like a question. Somehow this man seemed to know more than he let on.
“He was.” Richard admitted. “For one evening and half of a night. He attended a birthday celebration, but left in a rush. We haven’t seen him since.”
“I believe that is not entirely true, Mr. Ellis.” Jackson said and turned his back to the fireplace to look at Richard again. He made a step around the closest armchair and was now only a few feet from away. “I believe you even were one of the last people who saw him.”
How in the world could he know about this? Richard pressed his lips together and shook his head. It got more and more difficult to breathe. “You must mistake me for someone else. I only saw him once. At Lady Edith’s birthday. That was the last time.”
“Do you think me stupid? You know that he is dead. I had to threaten at least five people before I found out about that. You don’t need to be the brightest to notice that the police is careful who they talk to about this. Which tells me that you and the people in this house know more than you are admitting.”
Richard didn’t step back, even when the other man kept approaching. He would not let this ruffian intimidate him. “I demand that you leave. You have no business here.” He said coldly.
“There are more people here.” The man said with a dangerously low voice and a second later he had pushed his coat to the side and pulled a gun from the back of his pants. “And if you don’t talk to me, I’ll try my luck with them.”
Richard’s eyes widened. The gun was directed at his midsection. If the man decided to pull the trigger it would undoubtfully end in a bleeding stomach wound for him. And he didn’t look as if that would stop him. It would probably result in him looking for a new target. Richard slowly lifted his hands.
“I will tell you what I know.” He said quietly and pointed to the gun. “But there is no need for violence. Especially not against anybody else in this house. They were not involved in this.”
“You don’t say…” Mr. Jackson snorted. “Tell me what happened to the Duke.”
Richard pressed his lips together. His thoughts were racing. If he told him the whole truth, that he himself shot the Duke, he didn’t know what the man would do to him. Maybe shoot him. Maybe congratulate him. Maybe kidnap him to get revenge. There were to many possibilities. There was only one solution. He had to tell him the same lie, Thomas already told the police.
“He was shot by Lord Grantham’s former valet.” Richard said. “His name was Mr. Edward Howell. He is dead now. They shot each other.”
“Who else was there?” the man asked and didn’t react to the news at all.
“Beside the two of them, I was the only one there.” Richard replied with determination in his voice.
To his shock the other man simply laughed at that. “Don’t take me for a bloody idiot. Why do you think I asked for the butler of this house at the beginning of this conversation? I know Thomas Barrow had a hand in this.”
Richard froze. His heart stopped beating for a split second and he had the unmistakable urge to run from the room to warn Thomas. “No.” he said. “You are wrong. He wasn’t there.”
“Pity.” The man said and cocked the gun. “I thought you would be more useful.”
Richard closed his eyes.
The damn telephone chose this moment to ring again.
Both of them flinched and Richard was surprised when the other man didn’t shoot him on accident.
The telephone kept ringing.
“Who is this?” the man snapped annoyed.
“Am I supposed to have an answer to that?” Richard asked and it sounded way less sarcastic than he would’ve wished because the fear was clearly audible in his voice now.
The telephone didn’t stop ringing.
“You were on the phone before I knocked. I heard you through the door. Who was it? Could they be calling back?” He shook the weapon at Richard in a threatening gesture.
“My father.” Richard said after a moment of hesitation. He suddenly had an idea. “He might have forgotten to tell me something. He will get suspicious if I take it. He knows me to well.”
“Then don’t answer it.” Jackson said over the sound . “And tell me where the butler is.”
“Why do you need him?” he asked. “I told you about Mr. Howell. You clearly informed yourself before you came here. What else do you need?”
“I need to know where this Mr. Howell guy disappeared to, Mr. Ellis. I am not in the mood for games.” His voice was low and threatening.
The telephone stopped ringing before it immediately started again. Richard vaguely wondered what kind of emergency it was this time.
And still he couldn’t suppress a short laugh at the man’s last words. “I would highly suspect his body to be at the morgue or the police station in Ripon. Have you tried looking there?”
And now something like a small insolent smile crossed the other man’s face.
“And that is exactly why I know, that you are not the person with the information I need, Mr. Ellis.” He said cryptically. “If you were this person, you would know that I am not looking for a dead man.”
Richard’s eyes widened. “What?”
He didn’t have time to think about it. The door to the butler’s pantry opened without a knock and Henry walked into the room. There was something rectangular in his hands that Richard didn’t recognise in the brief moment before everything descended into chaos. “The phone is ringing, Richard. Why are you not-” He stopped abruptly when he spotted the man with the gun in front of the desk.
Everything that followed happened in the blink of an eye. Jackson had turned his head around when the door opened and the arm with the weapon lowered a few inches. He lost his focus.
Richard used the split second that the other man was distracted and bashed his walking cane against the inner side of the man’s right forearm. He was glad that it was the luxurious sturdy version with the silver handle that Lord Grantham had given him, because any other walking cane would’ve probably splintered under the force of the blow.
Henry let out a loud curse and dropped whatever he was holding, while the gun clattered to the floor. At the same time Richard threw himself against the bulky man and hit him again with the cane. This time it struck him against the side of the head. The cigar flew from his mouth and a second later he went to the ground like a felled tree.
Richard came to his feet as quickly as he could, with his stiff leg, still breathing heavily.
“What the bloody hell!” Henry gasped with a wide-eyed look at the unconscious man on the floor and the gun. Fortunately it hadn’t went off in the struggle.
Richard made a few stumbling steps back, until he stood next to Henry. “We have a problem.” He said breathlessly.
The former racing driver only stared at him. “What is happening? Who is that?”
“He wanted information about the Duke.” Richard said darkly. “I don’t know if he is a business partner or an enemy but he threatened to shoot me if I didn’t tell him what happened.”
“So you beat him unconscious with your walking cane?” Henry asked completely baffled.
“It was that or getting shot again.” Richard replied before he gestured to the ground. His fingers were shaking and he quickly pulled his hand back before Henry could notice. “Would you please get the gun?”
Henry Talbot arched a brow as if he was wondering why Richard wasn’t getting it himself, before he shook his head and picked it up, looking at it as if it would bite him.
He put it in his jacket before he stared down at the body of the unconscious man.
They both were silent for a moment.
Richard realised that the object Henry had dropped when he entered the room was the chess set from his room. The pawns were strewn around all over the floor.
“What are you even doing here?” Richard asked and hoped, it didn’t sound as impolite as it did in his head.
Henry let out something that sounded like a shaky laugh. “I thought we could play a match.”
A clap of thunder from outside made them both flinch and reminded them that there was still a blizzard raging above their heads.
“What now?” Henry asked. “We cannot call the police. They would never make it here during this storm.”
Richard looked around the room. There was no way they could get this man elsewhere while he was still unconscious. He was simply too heavy and Richard wouldn’t be a great help with his hurting leg.
“We’ll take the telephone.” He said quickly and took the keys to the butler’s pantry from the desks upper drawer. “And lock him in here for now.”
Henry looked as if he wondered how Richard knew the hiding place of the keys. He was probably not suspecting all the times Richard had locked this door behind himself and Thomas when they wanted a few minutes of privacy. “Do you think that is a good idea?”
Richard shook his head. “No. Thomas will not like this, but do you have a better one?”
No reply came to that, which spoke for itself. Richard grabbed the telephone cord and ripped it from the wall socket while Henry took the whole phone into his arms and made his way to the door.
In the corridor, the former racing driver shot a look over his shoulder before he sighed deeply. “Alright, we think about a solution for that situation later. Just lock that door. I don’t want that man to run around the house, threatening the people I care about.”
“It won’t come to that.” Richard replied while he locked the door and earned himself a frown.
“It already has.” Henry replied curtly and looked Richard up and down. “Are you alright? Did he hurt you?”
Richard needed a moment to stomach the fact that his employer had just declared him part of the people he cared about, before he could reply with a shake of his head. “No. I am fine. But he said something that concerned me.”
Henry seemed to notice, that this wasn’t a conversation someone should have in the hallway because he gestured in the direction of the boot room and after a moment of hesitation Richard nodded and followed. But not before he put the key to the butler’s pantry in his pocket.
The telephone was dumped on the table and a chair was shoved in Richard’s direction, before the former racing driver leant his back against a cupboard and crossed his arms in front of his chest. “What did he say?”
Richard pressed his lips together in discomfort. This wasn’t a conversation they should have. Fortunately that had never held Henry back.
“He basically implied that Mr. Howell is not dead.” He said and kept staring into his employers eyes, so he didn’t miss even the smallest reaction. “And I think he might have told the truth.”
Henry didn’t flinch but he also didn’t reply immediately and his gaze went to the floor for a split second. “What makes you think that?” he asked after a moment of hesitation.
“Perhaps it is the fact that he had nothing to lose by telling me, or perhaps I think that because there is definitely something Thomas hasn’t told me about. And if it isn’t one of these reasons, then it’s the guilty look in your eyes right now, Mr. Talbot.”
And now Henry did flinch, which was probably only partly because Richard had called him by his last name again.
“I don’t think that it should be me who tells you this.” Henry said quietly after a few seconds of silent and uncomfortable contemplation.
“So he is alive.” Richard concluded immediately.
The silence stretched between them.
“You should talk to Thomas.” His employer said after a while.
Richard put his hand over his eyes and sighed deeply. The feelings he experienced right now in this moment were a mixture of fear, anger and confusion. Why didn’t Thomas tell him about this? What would happen if Mr. Howell told anyone what really took place on this memorable day? Could he be a threat? Oh, what was he thinking…Mr. Howell was a threat. His only hope was that he lacked the stupidity, somebody in his situation would need to go to the police.
“Thomas lied to me.” Richard said and now he pinched the bridge of his nose. “Why did he lie to me?”
“I think you can answer that particular question for yourself.” Henry said.
Richard snorted bitterly. “To protect me from it.”
“He didn’t want to worry you.” Henry agreed. “I believe he was afraid what you would do if you found out.”
“What is that supposed to mean? Did he think I would lose it? I am not so highly sensitive that I cannot deal with a traitor who almost shot me, running around with information that could send me to prison.”
“I am honestly not sure what he thought, Richard. That is why you have to talk to him about it.” Henry started pacing up and down. “And then we have to think about the situation in the butler’s pantry. We will have no choice but to call the police about this.”
Richard’s felt ill alone at the thought of them coming back here. There must’ve been something on his face because Henry grimaced.
“I don’t like this either. But we cannot leave him here and sooner or later he will wake up.” He hesitated. “You could leave with Thomas, while we call them and return as soon as the coast is clear.”
Richard laughed. “And you think it wouldn’t look suspicious at all, if of all people Thomas and I would be missing when the police shows up? Don’t you think we should try to make this house look as normal as we can?”
“And one of you? They might not get any ideas if we pretend one of you is off to see…I don’t know…a fiancée or something like that.”
“I will not leave him alone.” Richard replied with a shake of his head. “And Thomas will undoubtfully say the same.”
“Well…then-“
A loud bang and an exclamation from the direction of the butler’s pantry interrupted them. “What the hell?!”
It was followed by a slammed door and a curse that Richard had never heard before but sounded quite Irish in his ears.
Henry froze and his gaze met Richard’s for a split second. “Tom.” He said.
“Go.” Richard said and the former racing driver nodded and was out of the room a second later.
Richard grabbed his cane and got out of his chair with a grimace. His leg was still stiff and he had to move slowly. When he stepped into the corridor Henry had already crouched down next to a cursing Tom Branson, who sat on the floor and pressed a handkerchief against his bleeding nose.
“Why is it always the nose with you, Tom?” Henry asked with some misplaced amusement in his voice, while he shook his head. There must’ve been another instance when Mr. Branson got a bleeding nose in the past, because Richard could only remember the one after the pub visit, Thomas had told him about.
“Henry, I am not in the mood for your jokes.” Mr. Branson grumbled indistinctly. The handkerchief turned red in a matter of seconds. “A man I have never seen before, just hit me with a bloody chess board!”
“Where did he go?” Richard asked and looked up and down the corridor. The door to the butlers pantry was wide open. He took a step closer. The lock was broken. It looked like someone had thrown his entire bodyweight against it.
It shouldn’t be a surprise. He had seen the man. And still it seemed like something that only happened in adventure novels or cartoons.
“I don’t know.” Mr. Branson muttered annoyed. “I was too busy with the pain.”
Henry squeezed Tom Branson’s shoulder one more time before he got to his feet and turned around to Richard. “This is not good.”
Richard would’ve replied something like you don’t say! If he had any energy left. Instead he rubbed a hand over his face. His eyes felt heavy all of a sudden. “I think I will go to bed.”
He could feel the two shocked gazes even though he was not looking at them.
“Would anyone bother to tell me what just happened?” Tom Branson asked and stumbled to his feet, the handkerchief still pressed against his bleeding nose. “Who was that man?”
Richard looked at Henry with resignation in his gaze before he replied to the former chauffeur‘s question. “I don’t know Mr. Branson. But I am hardly the one who is fully informed about any of this. I am sure Mr. Talbot or Mr. Barrow can bring you up to speed.”
His employer pressed his lips together in obvious discomfort but he only nodded as if he silently agreed with Richard.
“Do you need anything else, Mr. Talbot?” Richard asked a bit coldly and didn’t expect a reply.
To his surprise the other man nodded. “Don’t be a stubborn fool and talk to Thomas. I’ll send him upstairs as soon as dinner is over.”
“Don’t bother. I am sure he is busy.” Richard replied and then he turned around and decided that Tom Branson’s confused face would be the last he would see of the family on this horrible evening.
He had the feeling that something else would happen, if he didn’t go to sleep right now. And if there was one thing this day didn’t need right now it was another drama.
“You are starting to show, dear.” Were the first words her grandmother directed at Mary when she slowly stepped into the dining room with the help of Andrew and her walking cane. “You should consider wearing less revealing dresses.”
Mary barely suppressed an eye-roll. Of course. She had already expected a comment like this sometime in the near future. “I don’t need to hide the fact that I am expecting my husband’s child, Granny. Even you should approve of that.”
“I said nothing about disapproving.” Her grandmother replied a bit put out. “Which doesn’t mean that everyone who looks at you should be coerced to utter assumptions.”
Before Mary could open her mouth her mother decided to intervene. “I am glad to say that the days, when pregnant woman were expected to hide in their rooms for nine months are over. I never understood what was so terrible about seeing a new life grow into existence.”
Violet Crawley took her seat at the table with the same grace she would have showed twenty years ago, before she looked at her daughter-in-law with something like disappointment. “It is not the growing of a new life one should consider scandalous, but rather the fact that all and sundry is suddenly allowed to think about the reason for it.”
“Don’t tell me you turned prudish in your old age, Granny.” Mary grinned.
Her grandmother waved at a blushing Andrew instead of a reply. “Would you tell the butler, that I cannot possibly continue this conversation without a good glass of Pinot Noir?”
Before the footman could say anything her father appeared in the door. “No need, Andrew.” He said with a shake of his head before he took his seat at the head of the table. “Barrow was caught in the storm. I told him he should take the rest of the evening off.”
“My, my.” Granny said with ironic amusement in her voice. “The man doesn’t leave out a single drama, does he? Be careful that he doesn’t get so used to taking breaks that he neglects his work.”
“I wouldn’t dream of it, Milady.” A dry voice came from the door and the man in question stepped through with a bottle of Pinot Noir in his left and a tray with three glasses in his right hand as if he had read their minds or at least listened to the entire conversation.
For once her grandmother seemed speechless. Perhaps it was because deep inside she had agreed with her father’s decision to give the butler the evening off. Perhaps it was because people rarely talked back to her. Or she was simply surprised that a servant could’ve thought of the Pinot before she had even mentioned it.
Mary scrutinized Barrow for a few seconds. He didn’t look particular ill or as if he had just gone through a blizzard. His hair was perfectly styled and whatever he had worn while visiting Ellis’ family, there was no sign of water or creases because he had apparently changed into his livery as soon as he got back. The only sign that something was not quite right, was the tight grip of his left hand around the wine bottle. It was almost as if he needed to tense his muscles to not let go of it.
“Are you sure you are alright, Barrow?” her father was surprisingly the first one who asked the question, everyone was thinking.
“I assure you, I am perfectly fine, your Lordship.” Barrow replied with a short nod before he busied himself with pouring the wine.
Andrew looked wary for a few seconds, obviously being one of the few people who had seen Barrow arrive earlier, but he recovered quickly and began to bring them the first tray with baked potatoes. There were a few rosemary leaves next to them.
Mary loved these. She knew that they were one of Daisy’s specialties and suddenly she didn’t even mind that Mrs. Patmore had went home earlier this evening.
“Has anyone seen Henry or Tom?” Mary asked her family, while she scooped a mountain of potatoes onto her plate and ignored the Dowager’s condemnatory look.
Barrow finished pouring the wine and her grandmother’s gaze softened a bit as soon as she had her glass in her hand. “Thank you, Barrow.” She said with an appreciative nod that seemed like a rare form of praise from her.
“Well I hope, they are not somewhere out there right now.” Her mother replied with a frown and a look out of the window. The rain was still drumming against it.
“You went downstairs with Henry didn’t you, Barrow?” her father interjected and eyed the third wine glass with a bit of jealousy in his gaze. “Is that for me?”
Barrow’s hand stiffened around the bottle when he looked down at her father. There was suddenly something in his posture that told her that she was not the only one thinking about her father’s unfortunate escapade with the Brandy.
“Doctor Clarkson allowed you to drink something on one day per week. It is your choice to decide which day that is, Lord Grantham.” Barrow finally replied before he looked at Mary. “I have seen Mr. Talbot downstairs a few minutes ago. I am sure he will be here shortly. And Mr. Branson was trying his luck with the boiler again, last time I saw him.”
Mary could only roll her eyes, while her father wisely decided he would wait until New Year’s Eve with the alcohol.
Tom had set himself to try and repair the boiler, when it stopped working again this evening, as soon as the blizzard started. Mary couldn’t fathom why he wasn’t leaving it to the repair workers, who would arrive tomorrow, if the weather would let them.
“Do you think he confused it with a motorcar, Robert?” Violet said with a small snort. “One could certainly make the mistake, if you ask me. It is loud, overheats if you are not careful and is in constant need of fixing. Perhaps he will be able to repair it.”
“I am very glad you gained a considerable amount of trust in Tom’s abilities, but I am afraid I don’t believe he will be successful in this case, Mama.” The Earl of Grantham said with a small shake of his head.
Mary silently agreed with him.
A longer silence followed in which everyone began to eat their food. Mary was enjoying the rolled roast Daisy had prepared quite a lot. The green beans and the rosemary potatoes were also more than delicious. “This was exceptional.” She said as soon as she had emptied her plate and looked at the footman. “Would you bear my compliments for the cook, Andrew?”
The footman nodded and because he had never been as good as Barrow at the servants blank, she could clearly see how proud he was of his fiancée.
“I agree.” Her mother said with a small smile before she seemed to remember something. “Oh, I didn’t tell you yet. Edith called today. They are thinking of travelling to Downton for New Year’s Eve.”
Her father frowned. “Is she well enough for such a journey? It was not long ago that the child arrived.”
“One ought to think, she would want to rest a little more after such an ordeal.” Violet agreed with a frown. “I still remember how it was after your birth, Robert. I couldn’t bear speaking to anyone for at least a month. You should try having a civilised conversation when you haven’t slept a wink in days because your son won’t stop wailing. It is near on impossible.”
“Mother!” her father said indignantly and Mary noticed how Barrow turned a laugh into a cough in the last moment. “There is no reason to bring this up right now.”
Her grandmother looked as if she didn’t regret it at all. “I was merely explaining, why I would be amazed if our dear Edith made it here for New Year’s Eve. No reason to be upset, Robert. I am sure your daughter is facing the same problems as every other mother.”
“I am surprised you even had to concern yourself with that, Granny.” Mary drawled. “Don’t understand me wrong, but you seem like someone who would’ve left this to the nanny.”
“We didn’t have a nanny at the time, Mary.” Her grandmother replied before she took a small sip from her wine glass. “And I have to admit, I wasn’t as irritated by taking care of a child, as one ought to think.”
“I am glad to hear that, Mama.” Robert said dryly before he turned to his wife. “If Edith is truly planning to join us for the New Year’s celebration there are still a few issues we have to concern ourself with. It is only a few days from now, after all. And we will probably have to hope that this blasted blizzard disappears until then.”
“Of course.” Her mother replied. “I don’t want them to drive through this storm. If the telephone is still working tomorrow, I will call her again to talk about the details.”
Mary looked up at the butler. “Barrow, would you make sure that there are a few rooms prepared for them, tomorrow? Just in case.” A few seconds later her stomach growled quietly.
The butler gave her a curt nod, before he offered her the serving plate with the rosemary potatoes one more time.
She smiled at him. “Sometimes I think you can read my mind, Barrow.” She said and took the serving spoon one more time to add more potatoes to her plate.
Her grandmother fortunately didn’t make a comment about her appetite this time. Instead she looked at her son.
“Will you make absolutely sure, that Edith refrains from inviting this terrible Duke of Crowborough this time around, Robert? I am too old to borne another dinner next to the likes of him.”
Someone could have heard a pin drop in the following silence.
Barrow froze next to Mary’s elbow, the serving plate still in his hands.
Her parents exchanged an incredulous look and Mary herself wondered how they could’ve missed this.
Her grandmother had been bedridden with a rather nasty flu since it had gotten colder and no one had wanted to trouble her with the events that had occurred with Mr. Howell and the Duke. But that had been weeks ago. Someone must’ve told her…
Apparently not.
“Why are you all looking at me as if I said something incredibly tactless?” the Dowager asked now and narrowed her eyes at her son. “What have you kept from me this time?”
Her father’s uncomfortable gaze wandered to Barrow, who was busy staring at the carpet right now. Neither of them looked as if they would say something in the next few minutes.
Mary sighed. It seemed, as if she would have to bring the uncomfortable news. Typical. “You will never have to sit next to him again, Granny.” She said dryly. “He is dead.”
She saw Barrow flinch from the corner of her eye and pressed her lips together. How long would he stand there without adding anything to the conversation? Somehow she expected him to excuse himself in the next few minutes. She really hoped he would do it. This was clearly not a conversation topic he was comfortable with and absolutely no one could blame him for it.
“Dead?” her grandmother exclaimed truly surprised. “Dear Lord what happened?” she looked around the room. “And why am I the only one not informed about this?”
“We can talk about this after dinner.” Her father said and he was still looking at Barrow with a wary expression on his face. “This isn’t table talk.”
“Oh come now, Robert. Don’t insult me.” His mother snapped. “I can see that you kept this from me deliberately. Did you think I couldn’t take this kind of news because of my age? I will not suddenly die, just because you tell me that fate deprived the world of one more cruel idiot.”
“Violet!” Cora gasped and almost choked on the sip of wine she just took. “We should not speak ill of the dead.”
“Oh, why not Cora?” her grandmother replied dryly. “Perhaps you want to enlighten us what exactly this man did to deserve kinder words? Go on, I am sure we are all eager to hear it.”
Her gaze was piercing and not for the first time Mary felt as if her grandmother knew more than she let on.
Cora pressed her lips together, but her expression clearly showed that she had no idea what to say to her mother-in-law’s words.
“I thought so.” The old woman said with a small nod before she looked at Mary. “How did he die?”
Mary opened her mouth to reply, but she was interrupted by Barrow, who finally seemed to have enough. “Excuse me, your Lordship?” he asked her father.
Robert nodded apologetically and gestured to the door. “Of course. I am sorry, Barrow.”
Barrow nodded curtly and turned around without another word to leave the room.
Her grandmother looked after him with an arched brow. “What is wrong with him, now?”
“The Duke was shot by Robert’s old valet, Mr. Howell.” her mother began to explain to Mary’s surprise. She had been the one Barrow told about this at the hospital. Maybe she felt that it was her obligation to bring the news. She didn’t look happy about it. “But not before he threatened Barrow, Ellis and Henry with a gun. Ellis got shot during this encounter and barely survived. It is a subject we usually try to avoid in their presence and I would like to advise you to do that as well.”
It was rare that her mother sounded this stern. She was usually the one who smiled and comforted. But this was apparently a subject were she would not give in.
Her grandmother was speechless for a long moment.
“It is a long story.” Mary added. “And one that should best be kept secret, Granny. Henry was quite shaken after it and Barrow still gets agitated each time someone mentions the Duke’s name. The least we can do is not remind them of this.”
For a few minutes they were all silent, waiting for her grandmother’s reaction in something that almost was jittery anticipation. One could never say what this woman would think about certain subjects. The only thing that could be heard in the silence was the rain that was still drumming against the windows relentlessly.
“Where did he die?” her grandmother asked finally and surprised everyone with that. “Not in this house, I hope?”
Mary shook her head. “Somewhere in the countryside. We don’t know where exactly. The police started an investigation but it was over rather quickly. After all they shot each other. There is not much to investigate if both of the shooters are dead.”
Her grandmother arched a brow. “And no one has come to ask questions about this turmoil?”
“What are you talking about, Mama?” her father asked confused.
A small shiver went down Mary’s spine. She suspected what her grandmother was talking about and she was suddenly very glad that Mr. Howell was dead and the case was closed.
“A Duke died, and the last feud he had was with your house, Robert.” Violet said indignantly, as if it was surprising to her, that no one had thought of this. “And if you ask me he was not a very likable person. I suspect that he didn’t surround himself with the most pleasant of associates. If I were you, Robert, I would worry who else might come knocking at your door in the near future.”
“His killer is dead, Granny.” Mary said and shook her head. “No one in this house is responsible for what happened with him. We had nothing to do with his death.”
Her grandmother leant back in her chair and for some reason she looked out of the window now. She could not possibly see anything with the rain and the snow and still, it was as if she was looking for something.
“In the evening one may praise the day, Mary.” She said quietly. “Unfortunately I am quite sure we are nowhere close to that evening yet.”
Tom had left a few minutes later, grumbling something about getting ice for his nose from the pantry and he had left Henry with the task of cleaning up the mess.
The first thing he did was picking up the chess board and the pawns that littered the floor of the butlers pantry. There was a bit of blood on the board, which definitely belonged to Tom.
Henry grimaced and suppressed the urge to simply wipe it off with his sleeve. He tried to be more considerate of his clothes these days. If only to spare Richard the additional work. He still regretted ruining more than half of his trousers with engine oil the first few weeks. He never had a valet before, which meant that he was not used to caring about the state of his clothes at all. He tried to be more thoughtful, now that he was creating more work for someone, merely by kneeling down next to a broken car.
He placed the chess board onto the desk and decided to clean it later.
After that Henry went to the boot room and picked up the telephone. He put it back were it belonged on the desk in the butlers pantry and bent down to connect it.
The movement reminded him of an unusual weight in his pocket and he froze. The gun, they had taken from the intruder was still there. Henry slowly put his hand in his pocket, but stopped halfway before he could touch the metal.
Instead he took off his jacket and held it as far away from himself as he could. He eyed it carefully. What should he do with this? He couldn’t touch the weapon again. He had heard about fingerprints. What if the police decided to look at it? Or was it already too late for that?
And why was he even thinking about this? They did nothing wrong. Some stranger had brought this gun to Downton Abbey and threatened someone with it. If anything they should call the police in the morning and hand over the gun.
No he couldn’t do that. Bringing the police to Downton Abbey again could mean a risk to Richard and Thomas. If they suspected anything it could end in another arrest, which was something he didn’t want to be responsible for.
“Mr. Talbot?” a voice came from the door and Henry flinched and looked over his shoulder.
To his surprise Thomas stood in the doorway. For some reason the butler looked unsettled.
“Ah…” Henry said and put the jacket over his arm with a guilty look at it. “Yes?”
The butler blinked at him in confusion, before he shook his head and looked around the butlers pantry. The fact that he didn’t get suspicious immediately told Henry more than anything else that the man was exhausted. “Where is he?”
He? Henry thought before the penny dropped. Of course. Richard had went upstairs after their unfortunate encounter with the intruder. “He went upstairs.” Henry said slowly. “He was exhausted.”
Thomas looked concerned for a few seconds before he nodded. Unfortunately that was the moment when he spotted the chess board on the desk. “Did something happen?” he asked suspiciously and looked Henry up and down.
Henry sighed. There was no way around it. “We had an unexpected run-in with someone who was acquainted with the Duke.”
Thomas’ eyes widened. “What?!” he snapped and he immediately made another step into the room. “When?”
“Just now.” Henry said. He didn’t want to be the one to tell the butler about this, but he knew that Thomas had to be warned. There were only three people in this house who knew the whole story and Richard was in no condition. “He threatened Richard with a weapon and hit Tom with my chess board before he left.”
Thomas paled even more. His skin tone looked close to a corpses all of a sudden. There was fear in his eyes.
“Richard is fine.” Henry said quickly because this was surely the biggest fear right now. “But he knows now that Mr. Howell is not dead, Thomas. Whoever this man was, he asked for Mr. Howell’s whereabouts. Richard found out that we kept him in the dark about it.”
Thomas abruptly turned his back to him and stared into the fireplace. He lifted his hand to his face as if he was trying and failing to keep his composure.
“You must’ve known that he would find out about it sooner or later.” Henry said and shook his head. “It was only a matter of time.”
Thomas didn’t reply. He stared into the flames and didn’t move.
“You should talk to him.” Henry suggested. “He seemed agitated.”
“Not today.” Thomas replied and it was barely audible. “Too much already happened today. I don’t have the energy.”
That shocked Henry more than anything else. This was Thomas Barrow. A man who never admitted that he was tired. Who always kept his servants blank and refused to show any emotion to the people he worked for. And here he was, telling him that he was exhausted. He sounded so broken that Henry suddenly felt as if he was intruding in a very personal moment.
“I am sure he understands that.” He managed to reply but it was hard not to say more. He bit back any sympathetic words. He knew that would only make the other man more uncomfortable.
Thomas didn’t reply. His back was still turned, but Henry could see how his shoulders shook.
Henry had to do something. He could almost hear Mary’s voice at the back of his mind, ordering him to give the man a break. He knew she would know exactly what to say in a situation like this.
“Go upstairs and rest. Now.” He said softly. “You are done with the day.”
“I can’t-“ Thomas shook his head but his voice broke in the middle of the sentence and he didn’t try to conclude it. That alone was another sign of his exhaustion.
Henry stepped around the chair and put on a stern gaze. It took a lot to ban any sympathy from his voice but it seemed like that was necessary right now. “That wasn’t a question, Mr. Barrow. I am still your employer and I am telling you what to do right now.”
It took a few seconds but finally the butler nodded and seemed to pull himself together. He turned around and left without another word.
Henry sighed deeply before he grabbed his jacket and the chess board. He really hoped that tomorrow wouldn’t bring the same kind of chaos. They all deserved a break.
Thomas stumbled up the stairs to the bathroom in the servants quarters, where he immediately splashed cold water in his face and took deep calming breaths. He suddenly felt like crying.
There had been a reason why he had kept this from Richard. And now somehow he had found out about it.
He couldn’t think straight. He was feeling anger because of this intruder, whoever he had been. He was afraid for Richard and relieved that he had not been hurt. He was dreading the argument they would undoubtfully have tomorrow. He was grateful for meeting Richards family again and happy that he was a part of it. Meeting his own brother had left him with confusion and fear and regret. Hearing about his mother had brought nothing but emptiness.
It was too much.
He was thinking about sleeping somewhere else tonight, but the thought of Richard alone in his room kept him from hiding. No dreaded argument would keep him from making sure that the man he loved was alright.
And if he needed one thing right now it was Richard. Even if the valet would want nothing to do with him.
His hands cramped around the sink for a moment, but he managed to let go in the end. He looked into the mirror and took a deep breath. There were dark circles beneath his eyes. No surprise there. This day had been madness.
Thomas resolutely turned his back to his reflection and left the bathroom. He walked the few steps down the corridor and carefully opened the door to Richard’s room. The bed was empty.
For a small moment panic threatened to drown him. Had he left? In this storm? Was he this angry? Was that it? Could they really come back from this?
Thomas forced himself to snap out of it. Instead he shook his head to get rid of the thoughts and walked a few more steps to his own room.
And there he was. Richard was curled up on his side in Thomas’ bed, with his face to the door. The blanket covered him but Thomas could see from the door that he had taken off his shirt. His chest was rising slowly and his eyes were closed.
Thomas watched him sleep for a small moment and tried to ascertain if the man would mind it if he joined him.
He was still pondering that, when lightning struck outside and made him flinch. To his surprise Richard didn’t wake up.
This was ridiculous. Richard would’ve slept in his own bed, if he really wanted to be alone.
Thomas quietly closed the door behind himself and changed his clothes before he stepped closer to the bed and sat down next to Richard.
The valet had still not woken up, but when Thomas hesitatingly lifted his hand and stroked over his hair, his eyes fluttered open.
Thomas froze, not sure if the touch would be welcomed.
Richard’s eyelids were heavy with sleep when he blinked up at Thomas.
“I am sorry.” Thomas said quietly. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”
Richard slowly sat up and scooted a bit further away until his left side was pressed up against the wall. Thomas was not sure if he did it to give him more space in the bed, or to get as far away from him as possible.
“It’s alright.” Richard replied with a raspy voice but he didn’t look at Thomas. He stared down at his hands.
They were both silent for a few seconds.
“Can we talk about it tomorrow? Not now.” Thomas asked finally. “Please?”
Richard avoided his gaze for a few more seconds before he sighed deeply and nodded. Then he opened his arms wide. “Come here.”
Thomas let out something that was close to a sob. He closed his eyes, but it did not do much to hold back the tears. Without hesitating another second he sank into Richard’s arms and held on tightly.
“I am here.” Richard muttered and pulled Thomas down next to him until they were facing each other. He put his head on Richard’s chest and listened to his heart beat. “Just try to get some sleep.”
Thomas tried to close his eyes but there was one more answer he needed or he wouldn’t find any sleep tonight. “Are you angry?”
It took a moment before the other man replied. “Yes, I am angry.” He admitted.
Of course. Who wouldn’t be angry? Thomas had kept the truth from him. A truth that concerned him greatly and could put them both in danger.
“Will we be alright?” Thomas asked.
Richard didn’t hesitate this time. His voice was soft. “Yes.” He said and his hand stroked over Thomas’ shoulder. “I love you. Even if you try to push me away sometimes.”
“I am sorry.” Thomas replied before he dared to give Richard a deep kiss. “And I love you too.”
A few minutes later they both sank into a restless sleep only interrupted by the occasional clap of thunder.
Ethan Barrow opened the door to his family’s flat in London and the first sound he heard was the faint tune of the piano from the living room.
“I am home, Darling!” he called but his voice was lacking the usual enthusiasm.
The piano stopped. “Don’t stop practising, Emily.” His wife’s voice said sternly and a few moments later the piano started playing anew.
Ethan put his hat on top of the coat rack and slowly peeled the wet coat from his shoulders. He had dropped his brown leather valise to the floor as soon as he closed the door behind himself. The exhaustion had seeped deep into his bones.
On top of everything else the damn blizzard had delayed the train and he had barely managed to get back home through this storm.
He just wanted to sit down in his favourite arm chair with a glass of whiskey and avoid thinking about everything that had happened in Yorkshire.
He rubbed his hand over his face tiredly. Why had he listened to his mother in the first place? Why had he started looking for Thomas? Why had he even attempted to have a normal Christmas with his father and sister? He should’ve expected that it would come close to a nightmare…It was always like this with his family.
“Darling?” His wife had appeared in the doorway to the living room. The light of the fire framed her silhouette and almost made her look like the manifestation of a spirit from one of his stories. Her blond hair was flowing down onto her shoulders and it almost glowed in the dim light. “Are you alright?”
He sighed and made a step forward. “No.” he said and opened his arms.
She stepped into his embrace without hesitation.
“I missed you, Ada.” He whispered into her hair. She smelled like the lavender parfum he had gifted her for Christmas.
“What happened?” she asked immediately, because she had always been able to read his emotions. “How was Manchester?”
“Please don’t ask me now.” He sighed. “I just want to enjoy her music for a moment. Can we do that?”
She pulled back and looked at him with a critical gaze. Her brown eyes were radiating the warmth he had yearned for the whole train ride back. “Do you promise that we’ll talk after?” she asked.
He nodded with another sigh. “Alright.”
“Good. I am glad you made it home.” She replied with a smile and then she pulled him into the living room.
“Daddy!” Emily said with a bright smile and stopped playing. Her blond hair was tied back in a French braid and she was wearing the blue dress she had gotten for Christmas. Small dimples appeared on her cheeks when she smiled. “I learned a new song. Do you want to hear it?”
Even though he was feeling like he had been involved in a train wreck not only hours ago, Ethan forced himself to smile at her. “Of course. Where is your sister, Em?”
She wrinkled her nose in disgust. “Olive is in our room. She is swooning over this boy’s letter again.” And without another word she started playing the song.
Ada laughed quietly. “Sometimes I wonder how they can be twins.” She whispered in Ethan’s ear when they sat down in two arm chairs to listen to the music.
He returned the smile tiredly. “I stopped wondering that fourteen years ago and just accepted the fact that they are not.”
His wife rolled her eyes at him.
For the next few minutes they listened quietly to the beautiful music. Emily had a talent for it and she knew it. Ethan had never been so proud of her.
Then the song stopped and they both applauded.
“Beautiful, Em.” Ethan said and stood up to hug his daughter.
“Thank you, Daddy.” Emily replied with a big grin.
Ada got up from her arm chair. “Yes, you get better every day. I am proud of you. But now it’s time for bed, young lady.”
Emily sighed but she had never been the one who complained about anything.
“Will you tell your sister to get ready for bed as well?” Ada asked.
Emily rolled her eyes, which immediately made her look like an identical but smaller copy of her mother. “I don’t think I will be able to get her away from that letter. She hasn’t left it out of her sight all day.”
Ada sighed. “Very well. I guess I have to remind her again that she is fourteen years old and has no business swooning over boys. Will you be alright for a moment, Darling?” she looked at Ethan with slight worry in her gaze. He must’ve looked more exhausted, than he thought.
“Yes, take your time.” He said with a smile, that was probably looking more like a grimace.
She still looked concerned but she nodded and ushered Emily out of the door into the direction of the girl’s room.
Ethan sighed and rubbed with his hand over his face. He felt the sudden urge to punch something. Maybe he just needed a whiskey.
He got a glass out of the cabinet and poured himself a generous amount. He usually didn’t drink on a week day but today was an exception.
First the visit to Manchester where he had to deal with his father and sister and of course with his sister’s terrible husband. Then the awful weather and the blizzard…and worst of all. Thomas. He had not been prepared for this. And even though he had been searching for him, it had still been a shock to meet his older brother at the railway station in York. It had been a shock to see that he wasn’t dead with his own eyes. It had been a shock to hear the truth about what had happened with their family all these years ago. He always had been under the impression that it was somehow Thomas’ fault, that their family was this broken. He had never even considered that the truth could lie miles from that assumption.
A loud clap of thunder ripped him from his thoughts. He winced and the whiskey sloshed over the edge of the glass onto the armrest of the chair. “Damn it.” He muttered and dapped at it with his handkerchief. The rain was still drumming against the windows relentlessly. It would probably go on like this the entire night.
“Something happened.” Ada was back. How could she have put the girls to bed this fast? Maybe he had been lost in thought longer than he thought. Her look was full of concern. “You found him didn’t you? Or was it the rest of your family?”
He grimaced and put the glass down onto a side table. Somehow drinking had suddenly lost its appeal.
She stepped closer when he didn’t reply immediately and crouched down in front of his armchair. Her dress pooled on the floor around her like a beautiful rose coloured cloud. “Tell me what happened, Ethan.”
He leant back in his chair and closed his eyes. He knew he would tell her. He told her everything. He just didn’t know how.
“I found him.” He said without any emotion.
When he opened his eyes again she smiled brightly. “That is wonderful, Darling! I knew we were right. I knew he wasn’t dead!”
He couldn’t be happy with her. It had always been her, who motivated him to grasp for his dreams. It had been her who motivated him to go to law school. It had been her who motivated him to take a gamble. It had been her who motivated him to go looking for his long lost brother.
He doubted that she had this outcome in mind, when she pushed him in this direction.
“I met him in York.” He said with a sigh. “At the station. It was a coincidence.”
Her hand gripped his and squeezed. A silent support. She had obviously noticed that he didn’t share her enthusiasm. She didn’t say anything. Just waited for him to elaborate.
“He didn’t die in the war. Obviously.” Ethan continued. “Mum and Dad lied to me. All these years…” he shook his head incredulously. “They kept it a secret.”
“We already knew that.” Ada said patiently. “I read your Mother’s letter.”
“Well she didn’t write anything about the reason.” Ethan said bitterly and pulled his hand from hers. “Why they threw him out of the house at the age of fifteen. She just decided to let me discover this tiny detail on my own.”
Ada’s eyes widened. “They threw him out? You said he ran away…”
“I thought that.” Ethan said. “I asked Dad. He refused to tell me anything about it. And you know how my sister is…she scowls at Thomas’ name at any given opportunity. And even as an adult she is still too frightened of Dad to tell me anything.”
“Ethan.” Ada said sternly. “Tell me the reason. Why are you looking like someone died? What did Thomas do?”
“There was another man. At the railway station.” Ethan said and ignored the question. He didn’t know how to tell her, but it was probably best to just get it over with. “His name was Richard Ellis. I first thought it peculiar that he was traveling with Thomas especially when they said they were colleagues. It is after Christmas. Usually not the time to travel anywhere with a work colleague. Especially in this weather. Thomas refused to send him away. He allowed him to stay even though I asked him to speak in private.”
Ada frowned at him. She didn’t seem to know what to make of that.
“And then he told me why Mum and Dad threw him out and it all made sense.” He hesitated, not sure how to phrase it. “They were together, Ada.”
The frown was still on his wife’s face. “Well yes, you said they travelled together, Ethan.”
Ethan sighed. Apparently he had to be clearer. “Together, Ada. As in lovers. Romantically.”
She stared at him in shock for a few seconds.
When she didn’t say anything he decided to simply continue. “We didn’t talk much, Ada. I told him Mum died like I planned to, but after that he left and I didn’t stop him. I didn’t even think about stopping him…I just had to get away. I couldn’t even grasp what this meant until I was half way back to London. Then it got clear to me and now I wonder if I should’ve reacted differently.”
She still was silent. There was something like deep contemplation in her gaze.
“Do you think it was wrong? That I should’ve insisted on a longer conversation?” he whispered. “I don’t think I can…this is against the law.”
She was silent for another few seconds. Then she reached out and took the whiskey glass from the side table. She took a big gulp and he had to hold back a laugh. The situation was anything but funny. Finally she put it back onto the table and now she looked thoughtful. “I think leaving was the most reasonable decision.”
His eyes widened. “Really? You think that?”
She sighed deeply. “I wish it could be different. I know you are a kind person. But it was the decision you were forced to make. You know you could lose your job and even more if anyone could associate you with…people like him.”
Ethan pressed his lips together. “That sounds harsh, Ada.”
“The world is a harsh place.” His wife replied. “If we don’t fight for our rights we will go down. We cannot fight for everyone else’s rights on top of it. No matter how much it pains us. You know what we have to lose.”
“I know.” Ethan replied with a grimace. “But he is my brother.”
“And he is a grown man.” Ada replied firmly. “Who has survived a war and probably much more. I am sure he can manage his life without you.”
Ethan leant forward and put his head in his hands. “He told me that as well.”
“See?” Ada said quietly. “He sounds reasonable to me. He knows it could get you into trouble to stay in contact with him.”
“I just found him again, Ada.” Ethan said. “He is part of my family. A part that I missed for years. He was the only one I liked when I was a child. The only one who wasn’t distant. There has to be a way.”
She shook her head. “You know there isn’t, Ethan. If you let him into your life, you know, sooner or later you’ll have to choose between him and what we built. I think he is clever enough to realize that as well. You should leave it at that.”
“Do you say that because you worry for me or my job?” Ethan asked a bit snappishly.
Ada stared at him for a few seconds before she shook her head with a sad look on her face. “You are not the only one who could lose their livelihood here, Ethan. We are in this together. We have been in this together since the beginning.”
A few seconds of silence followed. Then he sighed again. “I know.” He said. “I am just so sorry. For him. And myself. And for Em and Liv who will never meet their uncle.”
“It is for the better, Ethan.” Ada said and her expression was as sad as his. “Please promise me you won’t call Downton Abbey again.”
He swallowed down his protest and thought about it for a few seconds, before he finally came to the conclusion that she was right. There was too much at stake. And he had to think about Olive’s and Emily’s future as well.
“I promise.” He said, before he got up from his chair, opened the window and emptied out the whiskey glass into the rain without a second thought.
When he turned around again his wife was staring at him with a pitiful look. He was rather certain, that she knew why he had done this.
“You just could’ve poured it into the sink, Darling.” She said with a small sigh.
Ethan closed the window and put down the empty glass on a side table. “I think it is time we get rid of the alcohol again.” He said darkly.
He drank from time to time, but he had also realized a few years back that every time he decided that he would not do it, his father was the cause. He had returned from his visit at Christmas more than once and promptly felt the urge to clear out the alcohol cabinet. Ada had never said anything against it. She supported him in every way and she knew how his father was sometimes. He was one of the two reasons why they had both decided not to introduce Olive and Emily to his family.
“Of course. If you think it will help.” Ada said with a nod.
“No.” Ethan replied and tried to keep the bitterness from his voice. “It never helps. But I am at least feeling some kind of satisfaction, because I am not like him, at least not in this way.”
“You are not like him in a lot of ways, Ethan.” His wife assured him with a soft voice.
On any other day, after any other conversation he perhaps would’ve believed her. Not today. Today he felt cruel and selfish because he couldn’t do anything about the fact that his brother was still suffering from a family that had hurt him in so many ways. A family Ethan was visiting every Christmas as if nothing had happened.
“I wished it was this easy, Ada.” He muttered and felt her hand in his neck a second later. She gently stroked over the skin and as always her touch was soothing.
“It can be this easy.” She replied softly. “You just have to believe that I am here for you, and that I see you as your own person, not as your father’s son.”
For a very small moment he believed her. The moment was gone as fast as it had come.
He couldn’t change that his family was broken. Alone the thought of it made him nauseous. And even though he was glad that she was here in his arms to distract him from it, he also knew with absolute certainty, that today would not be the last day he had to concern himself with the difficulties arising from his family. Meeting Thomas at a random railway station in the middle of a blizzard had once again confirmed what he had always believed:
Coincidences did simply not exist in this world.