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It’s funny, Namjoon thinks, how it always ends up like this. How every few months the three of them end up laying in a corridor outside the flat of an unknown college student or on a balcony, a joint passing between them, soft blue clouds floating around them with the scent of weed.
It often starts with a text from Hoseok to Namjoon, saying There’s a party at Jimin’s place tonight, come pls !!, with an awful amount of pleading emojis. Namjoon, would then say that he can’t, that he has a project to hand over at the end of the week, but after a few more texts from Hoseok he would finally let himself be persuaded. And then, Yoongi would receive a text that’s more or less the same, with a Joonie said he was coming, come on, don’t be grumpy it'll be fun added.
The parties were okay. The music was good, and when it wasn’t Yoongi would head over to the designated DJ of the night and promptly change the music to something better. The alcohol was bad, the vodka watered down because they were all broke students ( except Jin – the alcohol was always the best at his place), and the beer the cheapest on the market.
That’s the main reason that led them to take this habit. The weed was a compromise to the bad alcohol. When the night was already well started, that the bedroom were getting filled with hook-up and we could count two or three people that had thrown up in the bathroom or had just black out in a corner, Yoongi would take Namjoon’s hands and get closer to his ear so he could be heard above the music, he would tell him let's get out, and Namjoon would just say okay and get up from the sofa where they were lying on. They would then fray a path between all the bodies dancing under neon lights and grinding to each other until they’d found Hoseok.
As soon as he spoted them, Hoseok knew what it meant and he would wordlessly detach himself from the body he was grinding to, a smile as a sorry to the unlucky guy that had to find another partner.
Tonight was no different, they were sitting on the balcony of Jimin’s flat, bottles of empty beer laying around them. Hoesok and Yoongi were leaning against the wall in the corner, while Namjoon was sitting back against the bars of the balcony. They were digging uncomfortably between his shoulder blades, but Namjoon couldn’t find it in himself to mind it. The fresh breeze of spring was encircling them, and Namjoon could see goosebumps on Yoongi’s arms as he was wearing only a short sleeves shirt. Namjoon's fingers were itching to take off his sweatshirt to give it to him, but he knew better than to offer when he knew Yoongi would only respond with a tshh.
Hoseok had a joint pressed between his lips and was flicking a lighter in front of him in a vain attempt to light it, but the breeze wouldn’t let the flame take upon the joint. After a few minutes of desperate try, Yoongi lifted himself from where he was propped and in a swift motion straddle Hoseok's laps. From where he was, Namjoon could see the way Yoongi wiggled his ass for a few seconds until he found a position where Hoseok's bony knees wouldn't sink too much in his flesh. Then, he drew his hands close to Hoseok's and closed them around him. This time, when Hoseok flicked the lighter, the flame caught up to the joint and a cloud of smoke escaped his parted lips in an exhale.
At this point, Namjoon just wants to touch them, to feel them, to feel the air leaving their lungs under their ribcage. Yoongi took the blunt between his fingers and brought it to his lips while Hoseok was gazing to the sky, the last cloud of weed escaping his lips and blending in the night. Namjoon wanted. He wanted to press his lips against his neck, to lick his skin that surely tasted like sweat from before when he was dancing, to take it between his teeth until red and purple bruises blossomed all over him. He wanted his hands to discover all over again the body that he already knew so well. Hoseok's shirt was left open from the three top buttons, and he wanted to press his tongue against his collarbones until pretty noises escaped his pretty lips.
At some point, he must have lost himself in his thoughts, because the next thing he knows is that Yoongi is standing just in front of him. He crawls slowly into his laps (he must have left Hosoeok’s one earlier) and brings the roach to his mouth. A shudder courses through his body and all he can think is that Yoongi is close, that he’s sitting on top of him and that his tights – Yoongi has such pretty tight, white and smooth and soft – are straddling him, and his hands comes down on his legs and stroke him softly above his ripped jeans.
He is close, and so Namjoon can see that the joint is badly rolled, it’s okay, it’s Hoseok that rolled it and he never saw the men doing this well. And Namjoon looks at the joint, but then he’s looking at Yoongi’s lips because his lips pinch the joint and because he is close and his lips are so pretty. And right now, he really wants to kiss him, and he could kiss him. He'd just have to get closer, to press him a little bit closer to his chest and to press his lips against his.
Maybe Yoongi read his thought, or maybe he just saw it in his eyes that still hadn’t left his lips, but then he takes his jaw in his hand – not roughly but not exactly softly either, with just enough force to bring him back to the present moment and to part his lips. And Namjoon really thinks he’s gonna kiss him, but he stops himself when their mouths are just a few centimeters apart, and exhales a cloud of weed in his mouth.
The smoke fills his lungs and it feels so good. It’s been quite some time since the last time he got high; perhaps two months ago or perhaps two weeks ago he doesn’t remember, but he missed it. Once Yoongi finishes passing him the smoke, he shifts and lets his hand fall on his lap.
Namjoon throws his head back and exhales, lips parted and eyes closed. He can feel the stare of the two others on him, and wonder if they have the same thoughts as he had earlier about Hoseok. He faintly heard their voice speaking, and behind it the sound of the party still going on inside.
They smoke like this, Yoongi extends his arm behind him when the joint passes between him and Hoseok, and a bluish smoke starts surrounding them.
He stays like this, with no track of time (the weed started to take effect, or he might just be drunk, he doesn’t remember how much he drank tonight), but after some time the weight that was on him is not here anymore, as well as the warm, and so he feels cold. In the distance,he hears somewhere near him a whine).
He opens his eyes to see that Yoongi detached himself from him and went back to sit next to Hoseok, who now has the joint back and is breathing in the last of the joint. They both are looking at him with a strange smirke on their face.
“Joonie”, it’s Hoseok speaking. There is smoke escaping his mouth as he forms the words. He puts what’s left of the joint aside and crook a finger in his direction. “Come here Joonie”
So Namjoon gets up and goes to sit in front of him, because it’s Hoseok asking and what else is he supposed to do?
“Do you feel good Joonie?” He nods and responds with a quiet “Yeah”. He feels good, he feels like he is floating among the clouds and he’s with the two people he loves the most in the world. Hoseok is smiling when he looks at him.
“Are you cold Joonie?” This time it’s Yoongi speaking. He hesitates an instant. He is not cold from the breeze or the fresh air – he put a sweatshirt on before going outside – but he is cold from where Yoongi is no longer touching him. Is he making sense right now? Can he be cold from the missing feeling of contact ? He is not physically cold, but he is longing for the warmth of Yoongi’s body.
“Yah Joonie, stay with us okay, don’t get lost in this big brain of yours” says Yoongi again. He must have drifted off, it happens sometimes.
Yoongi must still wait for an answer because he is looking at him with expectation..
“Probably less cold than you”, he ends up saying while looking at his bare arms, and he sees the corner of Yoongi’s mouth lifting up at that.
“Come here then, warm me up” At first he thinks he wants him to come cuddle him, but then he sees the malice in his eyes and oh. Oh, it’s one of these nights then. Maybe they saw the hunger inside him after all.
He hurries up and sits closer to Yoongi and angles himself so that he is facing him more than Hoseok now. He doesn’t really know what to do next, he feels awkward – he is too big, he doesn’t know what to do with all his limbs. Should he kiss Yoongi? Touch his cheeks? (he really wants to touch his cheeks, they look soft and squishy.)
Maybe Yoongi saw that he didn’t know what to do next, maybe he knows him that well; or not, but either way he ends up straddling his laps (again), and then he takes his face in his hands and kisses him, deep. Namjoon is briefly surprised, and he has to adjust himself because this time there is nothing behind him to support him, so he spread his knees a little bit to keep balance. He places one hand on Yoongi’s cheek (he can now, Yoongi is kissing him) and the other in the hollow of his back.
Yoongi tastes like weed and vodka, but Namjoon doesn’t care. Yoongi kisses him, he licks the inside of his mouth and it’s a bit messy, there’s saliva in the corner of his mouth. He bites his lips, and it hurts a little bit, but it’s a good hurt, and Namjoon groans.
The kiss is good, Yoongi detaches himself from him just long enough to take a breath, and then he attacks his lips all over again. At some point Namjoon realizes that he’s letting out small noises every now and then, and it’s embarrassing, he feels the heat growing on his cheeks and …
Suddenly, he feels a hot breath mouthing at his neck, and a body pressing at his back. A hand comes crawling at his skin as another one is landing on his stomach up his sweatshirt.
Hoseok is pressed against him, chest to back, hands touching him everywhere they can have access to, Yoongi’s tongue is inside his mouth and Namjoon feels hot, he’s panting and he slowly feels his pants growing too tight.
Sometimes, Hoseok's lips pull out from the skin of his neck, leaving behind a trail of spit on which he gently blows, and a shudder runs through Namjoon’s body. He feels a hand coming closer to his jeans, and then finally presses on his hard-on. His hips jerks forwards without him meaning to and the moan that escapes his mouth is truly sinful. Namjoon feels like half of his blood is rushing south while the other half is rising to his cheeks, and he can’t help but hide his face in the crook of Yoongi’s neck. He hears in his ear the low shuckle of Hoseok's voice as he continues to put and relieve pressure on his crotch.
“Joonie”, he hears Yoongi say in his ear, “you wanna go home?”
The movements on his body stop as they let him catch his breath.
When he answers, even he can tell that his voice is all breathy.
“Yes, fuck yeah let just go please”