Chapter Text
I batted away the hand that was hovering over my face. Maybe a little too hard, since my cousin let out an audible gasp and a “ouch!”, but it was enough to stop him from pressing my eyelid.
“Would you stop touching me? It’s getting frustrating,” I hissed at him from across the booth, baring my teeth.
“I wouldn’t touch you if you didn’t look like you were in a bar fight!” he replied, hand over the one I slapped away as to massage it.
I sighed and let it slide for the moment. I looked out of the window, watching the landscape flying by so quickly I couldn’t even really grasp where we were, the details of this journey. Maybe that was the whole point, maybe you’re not supposed to understand how to get to this shitty school. How would I know? Until a few days before, I didn’t even know magic existed. I was not an idiot, and I was not oblivious to the fact that I’ve always been somewhat special. I didn’t go as far as thinking that my wishes getting true were some kind of superhuman power in my bloodstream.
“I was in a fight,” I clarified, “I was in a fight, in juvie, where your dad picked me up from.”
That shut Nicky up, at least for a few minutes.
He was nice, really. He wasn’t the kind of guy I expected to be part of a negligent family, but what kind of people even are those? He didn’t know I was even a person until his father looked me up and found out I was being raised by humans – or muggles, as they call them – and was in jail at the dire age of 14 years old. That was the reason my face was battered: I had a cut on my top lip that kept opening up and bleeding, a black - purple-ish, really - eye, and some bruises here and there.
All the same, I could tell Nicky liked me, maybe just for the sake of my brother who was still studying us like we were some kind of freak social experiment, and someone was about to jump out and tell us this was all a joke, and we weren’t actually family. I did get it, in some ways. It was hard to think of them as family, flesh of my flesh. They were never there and they just kind of appeared in my life, spawned where previously there was nothing. It was easier than I expected, to come to terms with that, especially since Nicky was some kind of human firework and Aaron did look exactly like me, but it was still a hard concept to fully grasp. I never had family. Or, at the very least, someone who loved me, who cared for me and my education. I never felt the need to have someone like that anyway.
But that was well before I went to Hogwarts.
So, there I was, on a magic train, headed for a magic school in a magic land. What could be so magical about Scotland?
My uncle gave me luggage and clothes and books and a cat, for some reason. Nicky named him King Fluffkins, and I went on, boarding a train in an invisible train station in the middle of London. I get why people don’t believe in magic: this shit sounds bonkers.
I was petting King when the train jumped and so did he, scared. He leaped off my lap and started running away when I tried to catch him.
“That looks like a you problem,” Aaron stated, still looking at me like I was about to disappear from before his eyes.
“Thanks, Gretel,” I replied, getting up so I could chase the cat.
As I walked through the train hallway and passed the booths where the students were seated, I examined their looks.
They were colorful and seemed to be happy, all wrapped up in red, blue, green and yellow. They looked like they were on the trip of their life, to the most beautiful place, and they didn’t seem to mind the wait. They didn’t seem to mind the fact that we were in the middle of nowhere, traveling at the speed of light. And they all looked at me like I was some kind of ghost, flabbergasted and shocked.
I didn’t really pay attention to that and kept searching the floor for my new, black cat, until I passed a booth and heard a gasp and a screech and a voice saying:
“Woah, Aaron! What the hell happened to you?”
I looked up and saw a very – emphasis on very, because his legs took up the whole booth – tall, black man, surrounded by two girls and guy.
They all looked at me in disbelief and utter panic.
“To me? Nothing, luckily” Aaron, who apparently followed me, answered from behind, “to him? A fight. Muggles like throwing punches.”
“Yeah, they don’t value their faces nearly enough,” the blond, tall girl in the booth confirmed, looking at her reflection in the window and scrunching up her nose.
“Okay, but who exactly is he?”, the black girl beside her asked.
I was about to reply that it was a stupid, rather rhetorical question since Aaron and I were twins and it wasn’t really shocking that we might be related, but then I noticed a petite, pale, blond girl crouched down at my feet.
And she was stroking King’s belly.
“That’s my cat,” I simply said, tilting my head to the side.
“I didn’t quite catch your name,” she just replied, a smile on her face as she looked up at me.
“Well, I don’t know any of yours either, but that doesn’t change the fact that you are indeed petting my cat.”
“Uh, feisty! I like him,” she said, standing up and handing me King, “and I’m Renée, by the way. Now, can I know your name?”
“He’s Andrew”, and that was Nicky.
Was this a band reunion of some sorts?
It was, in fact.
“Sorry for mistaking you for Aaron,” the black guy said, “I’m Matt, nice to meet you.”
He then pointed and added:
“That’s Danielle but you must call her Dan, or you will be slammed into a wall, trust me. And then we have Allison and Seth, weirdest couple on campus, and you have met the lovely, lovely Renée. And that’s the most of us,” he smiled, like he was proud of himself.
“Most? Us?” I shook my head.
“One is missing, actually. You’ll meet him tonight at dinner, though. He sent me a letter some days ago saying he wouldn’t be able to catch the train,” Danielle – or Dan, apparently – said, eyes fixated on me as she talked, “and yes, us. We are a group, or a clique, or… whatever you want to call us. We are friends. People don’t necessarily like that, Merlin knows why, but we make do. Is that a problem?”
“Have some pity,” Nicky replied, launching himself into the booth and on Matt’s lap, who giggled in response, “I don’t think he ever had any friends.”
“Yeah, he’s not exactly a social butterfly,” Aaron added, stepping into the booth himself.
“Well, I still like him,” Renée stated and winked at me.
“I bet Neil will like him,” Allison pounded on, finally looking away from the window and at me, taking in the whole image of me and smirking, “I bet he’s just his type.”
“That’s just nauseating,” Aaron said.
“Neil doesn’t like boys,” Nicky answered, “I would know. I asked him, like, a lot of times.”
“We know that” everyone replied in unison.
And that was enough for me to decide it was time to take off and return to my booth.
“Well, I’m going to go, now,” I said and turned away from them.
“Coming, Hansel,” Aaron rolled back his eyes and followed me again.
But when Nicky widened his eyes, and Matt straightened his back and they all looked up, I felt a chilling sensation down my spine.
I turned around just to see a group of people, all in black and red and gold, pale as it is possible while still having blood circulating in your body, looking at us like they were predators, and we were mere flesh.
A small, Asian guy stepped apart from that crowd, taking us all in as he smiled and sighed.
“Well, well, well, if it isn’t our favorite freaks,” he started, “who is the new guy?”
The group stayed quiet, and Seth hugged Allison as to protect her. I didn’t quite understand why they were so afraid of him, but it seemed like it was an over-exaggeration, considering the guy couldn’t be so strong and intimidating as he seemed to be to them. So, I just shrugged.
“You must be really dumb,” I replied, “for you not to see I’m identical to my twin brother. Take a guess, Addams family, it’s not that hard.”
Some of the guys behind him let out a gasp, some chuckled and he just got angry. He pointed his finger at me, jaws clenched and body tense.
“I’ll let it slide because you’re new,” he whispered, “but next time, you’re going down.”
“I’ll be waiting, Mulan,” I said, smiling at him like he was doing just a few moments ago.
As he walked away and his cult followed him, I pointed back and looked at the group, who was staring at me like I was better off dead at that point.
“Who was the little douchebag?”
“That was Riko,” Dan said, “and please, never do that again.”
“Why? What’s so special about him?”
“Just trust us, okay?” Renée looked terrified, “he’s not good news. Stay away from him. For your own safety.”
“I can watch my back,” I replied, petting the cat who was still held against my chest, “don’t worry about me.”
I then finally turned away and went back to my booth, where I laid on the seat, looked outside and thought about everything that was happening.
It was hard to keep track of the news in my life, the changes I had to make so suddenly, so quickly. So unexpectedly. I was just a boy who made very wrong choices for some very good reasons, I was just some dude who was fighting for his life with his teeth and nails. I never expected to be anything more. I never expected to be somewhat important. I was raised by twelve different families, never too long and never too lovingly. I was never enough, never educated, always beaten up and abused. I lost hope, growing up, to ever be free and live my life like it was actually mine.
Then the guard came, said I had visitors when I didn’t even really know anyone besides my cell buddy and took me to the family room. My uncle said my mother never admitted until some days before that she had a second son, that she was mentally ill and made a wrong decision many years before. He said that they would be happy to pay for my freedom and take me in and send me to a school that was appropriate for people like me.
I thought he meant a school for troubled youth. I thought he meant I had to change before I could be accepted into their house. I never would had thought he could bring me in a magical alley full of wizards and witches and tell me I was one of them, too. That all my family was pureblood, that I should have been raised to be the fantastic wizard I probably was.
I only had a few days to comprehend the extent of the deal before I was put on this train. I still didn’t know a lot about this school, and some 11-year-olds knew so much more than me. I still didn’t know how or why my wand was different from Aaron’s, or what was magic and how do we cast spells and was everything real? Were ghosts, and fairies, and vampires real?
How could this be happening?
Before I knew it, it was dark outside, and we’d been traveling for hours. Nicky and Aaron came back to our booth shortly after me and started chatting about the subjects and the courses they’d be taking this year. I couldn’t believe neither of them mentioned math or science. It all revolved around magic, somehow. Did they even know how to do basic math?
When the train stopped, we got off and had to leave our luggage and King Fluffkins behind. I assumed somebody would collect it afterwards.
We reunited with the rest of the group. Only then I noticed they were all wearing different attire, and that was probably why people didn’t like them hanging together.
Every group I laid my eyes upon had the same clothes, the same color. They were mixed up and of different ages, so they didn’t fit the standard.
“Oh, my sweet children!”
I looked up… and up, and up, and up.
The most gigantic man I’d ever seen, big and tall and with long, brown hair and beard, stood just before us. He had his arms wide open and a smile going from ear to ear.
The group just screamed and jumped and ran towards him, latching onto his body like he was some kind of big, fluffy teddy bear. I stayed distant, observing the scene.
“I missed you so much, kiddos,” he added, patting Renée’s head, “and who are you?”
“People seem to be asking that a lot,” I just said.
“Ah, we got ourselves someone with a bit of an attitude! That’s not going to be a problem,” the giant – half-giant, or so Dan would say to me later – smiled at me and signaled me to join the group hug. I just shook my head.
“He doesn’t do hugs,” Nicky explained.
“Well, if that’s the case, I’m Hagrid, little one,” he presented himself, and did a bit of a bow as the others left him alone, “if you follow me, I’ll lead you to the castle and then we part our ways.”
I nodded and started to follow him and the group. They were chatting away about everything and anything when I felt something by my side.
“Nervous?”
It was Renée, arms crossed behind her back and gaze fixated above, to the stars and heavens. She walked graciously and silently, like her feet didn’t really touch the ground. When I looked ahead, I saw the reason she was asking.
Hogwarts was, indeed, a castle. It was so high I couldn’t really see the top of some of the towers without my glasses. It didn’t look like a school, a least not the schools I was used to go to. It looked like a medieval fort and, I have to be honest, it scared me a bit. So, I looked at the girl beside me, who was smiling at me.
“I know, it’s intimidating,” she whispered, “that’s what I thought when I first saw it, too. But you’ll change your mind, in time. Hogwarts is home for those like you and me.”
“Like you and me?”
“For those who don’t belong anywhere,” she explained.
I nodded, searching for air in my lungs and finding none. That’s when she grabbed my hand and I went numb, shocked, angry, and cold.
“Renée.”
“Yes, Andrew?”
“I… I have a bit of a problem with touch, but I think you're nice and I don’t want to hurt you,” I said, “let go of my hand.”
She hastily let go of it and looked at my trembling limbs.
“I’m sorry,” she said in return, “I’ll never touch you without asking first ever again. I’ll make sure the others know about it, too.”
“Thanks. And, by the way, I do think you're okay, I guess,” I whispered, strength gone and lost.
“I also think you're okay,” she smiled again, “You’re safe here, Andrew, I promise.”
And I believed her, for the first time in my life.
---
Hagrid left me and the guys at the entrance, where they also parted ways from me.
As stated in the letter of my admission, I was to have the tour of the school with the first-year students, so I could participate in the sorting ceremony without attracting attention upon me. It really helped that I was as short as they come, because I blended easily into the group of children three years younger than me.
We were greeted at the door by a professor, and she presented herself as Minerva McGonagall. She was really, really old and honestly, I wondered how she was still alive. She probably witnessed the French revolution with her own eyes. She had stern eyes, a severe look on her face and grey hair tied in a very slick bun. But she seemed kind and loving as she took us from room to room, explaining the details of this magical school and how it worked. There were a few warnings, too: don’t explore too much, the stairs like to change – whatever that meant – and the paintings hear and watch everything and anything we do in the corridors, so we better watch our mouths.
I bet that was particularly aimed towards me.
As we stood before the entrance of the dining room, she turned to us and smiled.
“Children,” she began, “very few people are lucky enough to attend this beautiful school, and I’m very proud to say that here, you are at home. This will be your house and school and family until you are brilliant young adults who will shape the future of magic. I hope you will find here the harmony and the joy we are willing to give you. Now, if you follow me, the sorting ceremony will begin.”
We stepped into the dining room, following McGonagall and everyone, all at once, looked up.
I was stunned.
The ceiling wasn’t there, or it probably was, but it was surely covered by an incantation that depicted the night sky so beautifully, it almost looked real. It was identical to the one Renée and I were looking at just minutes before, in awe at the magnificence of the stars and moon and the deep, blue sky. I then looked around me to see four parallel tables that were basically as long as the room itself, which ended in a short staircase and a horizontal table were the professors sat. There was a little bookstand at the top of the staircase, and a chair next to it.
We were headed there.
McGonagall pointed at the tables and explained how they were divided per Houses, so that, when we’d be sorted out, we would know where to go and sit. She went up the staircase and held another little monologue so the other students would listen and stop talking with each other.
I looked back to recognize the familiar faces of Nicky, Matt and Renée sat together at the very start of the table just beside me. They were all in the same House, then. Whatever that was. They smiled and waved at me, and I guessed that was what made them similar: they were warm, and accepting, and they valued nothing more than loyalty and friendship.
Dan was sat at the table next to theirs, where red reigned: not too far from her there was Riko’s group and friends. I didn’t know how such a fierce, strong woman as Dan appeared to be, could be put in the same position as Riko and his little cult of zombies, but all the same, I guessed.
Aaron was alone at the table across from them, where everyone wore blue and black: most people there were silent and absorbed in the ceremony, and I guessed they were the group that valued knowledge and intellect.
Behind him, at the green table, hugging and holding hands were Allison and Seth, who were too quiet and self-absorbed to actually gain some information about them.
As I watched all of them in what was supposed to be their natural element, people were being called and sorted out into those same Houses. People so young, how can they have an actual set of values? How can they know what that little child was supposed to be?
“Andrew Minyard,” called McGonagall.
I looked ahead, where she was waiting for me at the bookstand.
I popped out of the crowd, walked up the staircase and sat on the chair. I didn’t know what I was expecting, but certainly it was not a hat. A simple hat.
That talked.
“How interesting,” it said, “someone who really doesn’t know who they are.”
“I…”, I began, but it didn’t let me finish.
“Oh, child, your thoughts are so loud! What do you feel? What do you think?”
I sat there in silence, heart pounding as I didn’t know how to respond and how to act. I grasped the chair, nails digging into the wood.
“I see someone who is smart, but cunning, loyal and brave. I see someone who is not afraid to do something wrong if it is to protect someone they love… or maybe just themselves. A mystery, indeed, because you walk in here and you don’t even know why… or how. How can I sort you out? How can I decide?”
“Why did you put my brother there?”, I asked, closing my eyes, and thinking about Aaron.
“Ah, yes! Your brother… the Ravenclaw. Do you wish to be with your brother?”
“I guess…?”
“Well, that could put you in Hufflepuff. I have to be careful with you, my child. I have the feeling if I put you in the wrong place, I could ruin you…”
“Why?”
“Because everyone who values everything is too fragile to endure heartbreak and strong enough to be feared. You are powerful and you are curious, you are loving, and you are cold-blooded. You could be anything, any one of those Houses. So where do I put you? Where do you stand?”
“Why are you asking me? Isn’t this your whole job, stupid talking hat?”
“I see why you say that,” it said, then took a minute to think about it in silence, as the whole room stayed quiet, “Then, it’s settled. Ravenclaw!”, the hat shouted, and the table in blue rose and applauded me.
I walked in a trance towards my brother and sat beside him, looking at the food on my plate.
“Why did it put you here?”, Aaron asked as soon as I picked up a fork.
“I don’t know, ask the bloody hat.”
“Yeah, maybe I will.”
We sat in silence throughout the rest of the ceremony and the dinner, which was accompanied by the annual welcome speech by the headmaster, Dumbledore.
When everyone started scattering away to their beds, the group reunited around us, and Aaron started chatting away with them.
I moved away just a little, focusing on the food: I hadn’t had something in my stomach that felt like real food in years. I hadn’t eaten like this ever.
“You seem awfully quiet for someone who just got in the most famous magical school in the world,” an unfamiliar voice beside me said.
I lifted my gaze from my plate and pointed it at the guy beside me.
And my food caught in my throat.
He was stunning. Ocean blue eyes and red, fiery hair that curled a bit at the ends and fell in front of his eyes, a face so symmetrical it was almost scary and two full, rosy lips pressed together in a small, cunning smile. He was the most beautiful person I have ever laid my eyes on. He was so pretty I almost forgot what he said.
“I’m not the chattery type,” I replied.
“You and the hat talked quite a lot, what was that about?”, he said, grabbing a plate and stuffing it with food.
And then, I noticed he wasn’t using a fork. He was lifting stuff. Like, with his mind.
“What are you doing?”
“Magic, dummy,” he smiled again.
“But… you’re not saying spells. And you’re not using a wand,” I pointed out.
“Yeah… sometimes I don’t need to do that. So, what was the hat telling you?”
“Who even are you?”, I asked, returning to the food in my plate so I could go on about my life and avoid this ridiculous, pointless conversation.
“I’m Neil,” he said, and extended a hand towards me.
“I don’t…”
“Oh, I didn’t want to shake your hand. I just… wanted the salt. Could you pass it? It’s like, right beside you. Thanks.”
I tilted my head to the side and looked at him, really looked.
“Did Renée talk to you?”
“No, why?” he said, grabbing the first big bite of food with his fork and stuffing it in his mouth. I pointed at his hand as I passed him the shaker.
“Oh, yeah. No, I just noticed you weren’t really a touchy guy. It’s fine, really. I don’t like touch either,” he kept rambling on.
“You… talk a lot.”
“Well, it’s just damned luck that you don’t talk at all, then,” he smiled all teeth at me, and I nodded.
It made me smile a little too.
“Why weren’t you on the train?”, I finally asked after quite some time.
“I came by foot,” he said, not lifting his gaze from the food.
“Do you live near here?”
“Let’s say that,” he nodded.
He talked to me about how he transferred the year before from Durmstrang, where his mother and father enrolled him. So, he knew all about being the “new kid”. He told me how the group of friends took him in, outcast with other outcasts, and they all became friends. They all played a game, a magical game that was like rugby but in the air. Quidditch, it was called. He told me the tryouts were in a month and I could try to play if I wanted to.
He kept talking and talking, never really saying anything about himself or his family. It was extremely clear that, while the group thought they were all alike, he was different in some ways. It was like he talked in fear I asked something about him, something he didn’t know how to reply to without telling me a truth he didn’t want to say out loud.
“Did the puppy get a new friend?”
Suddenly, between my face and Neil’s there was Riko’s, smiling wickedly at the both of us. Neil sighed, and batted Riko’s hands away from his shoulders.
“Leave them be, Riko,” a guy from his group said. He was tall and pale, just like the others, but he had a little “two” tattooed on his cheekbone. Riko had a “one”, in roman numbers.
So, it didn’t surprise me when he ignored the first guy.
“I’m having a lot of fun tonight,” he said, “but it wouldn’t be complete if I didn’t come here and joked around with my little doggy.”
“It’s our first night,” that was Renée, coming closer to us, as to protect us from him, “don’t you like, have some holidays? Is tormenting us a full-time job for you?”
“Shut it, pixie,” he yelled, and Matt was quick to hug her so she wouldn’t be scared. But the only thing I saw in Renée eyes was pure rage.
“So, do you like your new pet, puppy?”, Riko kept going, looking at Neil. He just clenched his fists and squeezed as hard as he could, “is this a no? So, what if I do this?”
He put a hand on my shoulder. The other ran to a knife.
I was quicker.
I grabbed his hand, the knife, stood up and flipped him onto the ground, over my shoulders. I was tiny and short, but I didn’t go to juvie because I was fragile as a flower. As Riko laid onto the ground, I knelt on his chest and pointed the knife at his throat.
“Touch me again, samurai,” I hissed, “and I will rip out your windpipe and use it as a flute to play at your funeral, do you understand me?”
He just stared at me blankly, but I took it as a win, so I pierced the floor right next to his throat with the knife and got up. I started walking toward the hallways, not looking back at the people I left behind.
“Where are you going?”, that was Dan.
“To my bed. I need some sleep,” I shouted back.
“But you don’t know where the common room is,” Aaron.
“And you don’t know the password,” Matt.
“Don’t go alone, Andrew,” Renée.
“I’ll ask around,” I lifted my hand to signal them to stop caring.
When I was about to exit the dining room, though, I turned around. Riko was gone, and the group was talking like nothing happened, not caring about me or where I was headed. But two blue eyes were studying me like I was the most interesting thing that they’d met in a while.