Chapter Text
“ -and soon enough, it will be as if we never felt it at all. Mere passion. It must because it has to.”
The silence that followed weighed heavily on Kate. She watched Lord Bridgerton, Anthony as her traitorous mind referred to him, shake his head at her. She wonders how he could possibly argue against her. Both families will suffer scandal if they do not fulfill their duties. How could he fail to see that?
More silence followed and she allowed herself to get lost in his eyes one last time, until he finally replied with a quiet and firm “Very well.”
She simultaneously felt dread and relief until he stepped closer, invading her space.
“If that is truly what you wish…” he grasped her hands and returned her stare with wide, earnest eyes and continued “If that is truly what you wish…I will do as you ask. Is that what you want?”
Kate was immediately transported back to the Hearts and Flowers Ball, as he asked her the same question among the watchful mamas of the ton and the hopeful eyes of her sister.
Grasping his gloved hands, it suddenly struck her that no one, aside from Anthony, ever asked her what she wanted. Mama, Edwina, even Lady Danbury were perfectly content to believe the half-truth of her desire for freedom and independence. And loneliness, her mind whispered.
Yet Anthony is the only one who pushed beyond the lie, who demanded an answer instead of assuming it. Twice.
It is in this moment, as he squeezes her hands and places the direction of his future up to her desires, that Kate realizes she cannot doom him to a loveless marriage, just as she cannot allow Edwina to experience that unhappiness.
No matter how much young, sweet Edwina thinks she wants it. No matter how much Lord Bridgerton denies himself the love match he too deserves. Even if it is with another woman.
She slowly extricates her hands from Lord Bridgerton’s grasp and replies with a resounding “No.”
She leaves the clearing first. His words, “ It will be as if we never met ” repeating in her mind, willing them to be true.