Chapter Text
You were with Craig the night the world fell apart.
It was evening, and he had invited you out for coffee. You weren’t quite sure if it was because he wanted to spend time with you or see his best friend Tweek. More than likely it was a mixture of both of those two feelings, though Craig Tucker wasn’t one to admit to having them. Feelings, that is. It was winter break, so everyone was back from college. He had texted you an ambiguous message earlier that day in greeting, one that had left your brows furrowed and your heart beating oddly. Ugh, you hated when Tucker messaged you because you always got your hopes up for nothing.
Your crush started in the ninth grade, though nothing ever came to show for it. You still had some feelings, buried underneath all the denial and forced unawareness, but for the most part you were able to go through your days normally. That is to say: without one thought of Craig Tucker. It also helped you both went to different colleges, so therefore the two of you had very little interactions. The most that happened was he would comment on your statuses and you would imagine his nasally, apathetic voice saying the things he typed aloud.
You really needed to get out more and make new friends.
Honestly, you were still wrapped up in this crush. You had hoped once you went to college you would forget him; forget all about South Park and the crazy shit that always seemed to happen in the small, mountain town. No such luck so far. It was truly a pity. No boys were overly interested in you, nor did you show much concern in that regard. You hadn’t even asked one guy for his number since you had started school! You really need to remember your vow that you would forget Craig Tucker. It was proving harder and harder to do with each passing day though.
are u going 2 go?
Think of the devil and he shall text you again! You glanced at your smart phone, brows furrowed and raised it so your fingers could slide smoothly over the letters. I already told you yes. I thought you were going to pick me up? You set your phone back down and went back to watching your TV show, eyes idly glancing at the clock every few minutes. It took him a whole ten before he actually texted you again. He was notorious for being the slowest texter in South Park. Hell, even Butters-- who had the oldest phone imaginable because his parents refused to pay a lot of money on it-- texted faster than Craig, and Tucker had an iPhone!
o ok. walk or drive?
Doesn’t matter. You can choose.
see u in 5. You sighed as you reached your hand out to turn off the television, jumping to your feet. You supposed you should actually wear something nice for a change. You had been lounging around in your pajamas for most of your winter break. It’d be a nice change of pace to switch it up a little and put on something decent. You hadn’t seen Craig-- or Tweek, who was also your friend-- since last summer before you all went back out to college for Sophomore year. Craig was at Boulder, while Tweek was just in Denver. You had chosen to go to Chicago instead. You’d gotten a scholarship, so why the fuck not? It had also helped your plans of getting away from this small, mountain town too.
He was actually there in ten minutes, not five, but you had been expecting that. Craig was obnoxiously late to everything. He’d be late to his own funeral if he could. He laid on the horn for a good fifteen seconds, causing your brows to snap together in annoyance. He was out there acting like you were the one who was late! Huffing, you grabbed your messenger bag and slid out the front door, making sure to pat your pockets to check for your keys before closing it all the way. You had locked it from the inside and didn’t want to come home to realize you couldn’t get back in.
He looked good. Your first glance at him as you walked over to his car told you that his hair was a little shaggier, but he was still wearing that damn hat. As you opened the passenger side door, your eyes took in the whole appearance. “Well look at you,” you greeted. “Looking just as casually hipster as ever.”
“I don’t look hipster,” Craig told you in that emotionless, nasally voice of his. His eyes slid over to connect with your own before easing away again. “Get in. Let’s go.”
You closed the door and buckled yourself in, allowing your bag to sit between your feet on the floor. “How’s Boulder?”
“Better than South Park,” came his reply a few moments later. It was a simple ride to Tweak Bros, mostly because in South Park everything was close to everything else. After he responded to your question you both fell silent; there wasn’t much to talk about quite yet, or maybe you were both even feeling a bit awkward. You weren’t one hundred percent sure at this point. Knowing Craig, he just didn’t want to put the effort in to make meaningless conversation. You just felt awkward.
“How’s Chicago?” He finally asked it as he parallel parked in front of the shop. You glanced over at him as your fingers went to undo the buckle, raising a brow. He looked at you blankly. “What?”
“Surprised you even asked,” you responded with a chuckle as you opened the door and hopped out. “The Craig Tucker from high school wouldn’t give a damn.”
“I’m the Craig Tucker from college,” he said gruffly as he shook his head at you, rolling his eyes. His finger actually came up to flip you off, which gave you a sense of nostalgia. “I’m asking you.” You weren’t sure if you should, but you felt touched that he didn’t mention the ‘not giving a damn’ part. Could that mean he actually cared? You were probably thinking too far into this. It was Craig, after all.
“It’s great,” you told him honestly. “A lot different from South Park, which I love! No more crazy, whacky adventures because of Stan Marsh and the gang.” Though you did miss making fun of Stan and his friends with Craig, it was a small price to pay for some normalcy in your life. Ever since you moved to South Park in the fourth grade, you had learned that nothing here was ever normal. It was always out of control crazy. Just look at Craig! He went to Peru and shot lasers out of his eyes! That was not normal.
The two of you walked side-by-side to the front door of the coffee shop. You could just see Tweek inside, hurrying around to fulfill orders. You hadn’t seen him since last August, and it made you grin as you watched him spazz minutely behind the counter. You missed your old friends; though you were happy to be out of town now, that didn’t mean they hadn’t wormed their way into your heart. Clyde texted you on a regular basis (probably to annoy you) and Token even e-mailed you sometimes. Tweek was the one who usually messaged you on social sites, texted, and e -mailed. He was the only one who seemed to keep in regular touch with you. Craig was usually pretty silent on his end.
A pang wracked your chest, but you ruthlessly shoved it aside. You had to ignore that. Craig and you were growing older, growing apart. It didn’t matter that he didn’t talk to you as often as he used to now. This was what getting older did to friends; they slowly branched into other places in life and left each other behind. You didn’t try to text him after all. But that was mostly because of how stubborn you were; if he wasn’t going to text you first, then why should you waste your time on him!? Huffing, catching Craig’s attention in reality, you kept your eyes straight forward as you marched into the shop. You hadn’t even noticed that Craig had noticed your aggravated sigh. You probably weren’t even aware you had done it aloud.
“Hello, Tweek,” you said brightly as you reached the counter. The blond male jumped, startled, and then turned to blink owlishly at you. When it finally dawned on him who was speaking to him, a small smile lit up his face. He murmured your name, and that was when you reached over the counter to pull him into an one armed hug. He sputtered and you were quite sure that his face was red. Pulling back, you were smug to realize you had been correct. His face was the color of a ripe tomato right about now.
“(Y/N),” he murmured and his eyes darted over to Craig, then back to you. “I-It’s nice to s-see you again.” Thankfully the old nervous twitches he used to have in elementary school had slowly faded, and now he just stuttered occasionally. You were mostly glad because you had hated it when he would spazz the fuck out with a bunch of “nnghs” and grunts in his sentences. It made it hard to follow his train of thought and respond to him.
“It’s good to see you too.” You glanced up at the menu, though you had it memorized by this point. You could probably order your drink blindfolded. Tweek didn’t even wait to see what you would say; he was already flitting about on the machines, whipping it up. By the time your eyes fell from the menu, he was already holding it out to you, a small smile on his lips. “Thanks!” You reached to slide out money from your jeans and handed it over to him, dumping the rest of the change into his tip jar. He practically glowed when you did that; he probably didn’t get a lot because he was usually dropping and spilling drinks on a regular occurrence.
“Craig,” he said and he nodded towards the male. “What do you w-want?”
“Coffee. Black.” Craig was the one who always changed his order each time he entered. You knew he usually had about ten favorites at any given time, and that meant Tweek couldn’t just go about making something like he did with you. You were normal, bland. You ordered the same thing every time and never grew bored of it. It was probably one of the main problems with why you couldn’t stop liking Craig; once you started liking something, it was damn near impossible to get you to stop. Your eyes had slid over to study the male as he placed his order, and now they clashed with his own as they flicked over to yours. “What?”
“Nothing,” you said and quickly shook yourself, turning away and watching as Tweek got Craig’s coffee. You could just barely make out the slight shift in Tucker’s expression, but he didn’t push you on it. That was the thing with him: he never pushed anyone on anything. He preferred to let people come to him if they wanted to talk, and even then he usually didn’t give two shits about what they were saying. It was hard to get Craig to actually genuinely care. He didn’t do it for anyone outside of his circle of friends, and even with those friends he only did it occasionally. Otherwise it just felt like he was putting up with you and pretending to listen to your problems.
“H-here you go,” Tweek murmured and you were both snapped out of your separate thoughts. Craig reached forward to take the hot drink out of his friend’s hands, then paid quietly and headed towards a window booth. It was the same place he sat every time he came in here, and you were already headed in that direction before he had even paid his tab. Some things never change.
Since Tweek had no more customers he trailed along behind you both, standing at the edge of the table instead of sitting down with you. He was probably nervous about being ready for any customers that might walk through the door. “How’s school going, Tweek?” You were the one to ask, of course. Craig was sipping away at his beverage and not paying much attention to you both. Tweek glanced at you, then at Craig, before finally settling his gaze more firmly upon your face. He shrugged one shoulder and bit his lower lip, worrying it between his teeth.
“I’m managing o-okay,” he murmured and his eyes flitted away from your own. That meant he was probably only getting C’s but that was pretty good. Considering the Tweek from years passed, this one was flourishing and really succeeding. His parents used to think he’d never leave South Park and start to get a real life. You were rather proud of him yourself, though you felt foolish for being a ‘mother hen’ about him. “I c-come here on the weekends and work so I can s-see my parents.”
“That’s nice of you, Tweek.” You sipped your own drink as you studied him. You were about to open your mouth to ask him another question, but he beat you to the punch. His eyes were bright as he finally pulled up a chair and seated himself. It was clear by the deserted street outside no one else would be in for awhile yet.
“How’s Chicago? You’re s-so far from h-home. It must be s-scary.” He said this every time he saw you during breaks, mostly because it always rekindled in his mind when his eyes set upon you. You managed a small smile and gave a shrug of your own this time. Living so far away wasn’t so hard; your Aunt lived in one of the suburbs outside of Chicago, so if something happened you had family there to help. Your mother didn’t like it that you refused to be like Craig or Tweek and go closer to home, but this was what you had wanted. You had wanted a life away from South Park.
“It’s a new experience,” you told him honestly. “Though there are people from South Park that are going to school in the area. Wendy is only a few hours away; one time we met up for dinner when she was in the area ‘cause of a convention for her major.” It was the truth. You still had contacts from South Park besides your old group of friends. You talked to Wendy and Bebe occasionally, and Kyle also sent you e-mails from time to time. It wasn’t that you were completely cut off from your old life, or that you didn't have friends who cared about you now. “It was easier on me to live so far away once I made some friends.”
“O-oh,” Tweek muttered and bit his lower lip again. His eyes went to your face, then back to Craig’s again. You furrowed your brows at that and glanced over at the dark haired male yourself. Craig was studying you intently, and probably had been the entire time you were speaking, but now that your eyes were on him he looked away. You blinked in his direction, then turned back to Tweek. It was clear he was the only one who was going to keep up the other end of the conversation. “W-what about... no, nevermind.”
Now that was something new. Tweek usually didn’t completely cut off what he was about to say and refuse to continue. Your brows furrowed as you leaned forward so your elbows could balance on the edge of the table, eyes curious. “What?”
This time Tweek stared at Craig for a few moments before finally opening his mouth to continue. “D-do you have a boyfriend?” His face turned bright red and you just stared blankly at him, stunned he would ask. He usually didn’t try to delve into anyone’s personal life. You looked at Craig yourself to find he was back to watching you, brows furrowed. You frowned back at him before turning back to Tweek.
“Nah,” you replied and shrugged. “I’m not really interested in that whole scene.”
“Y-you’ve never had a boyfriend?”
Tweek was really pushing it today. Where had he found all this confidence all of a sudden? “Why are you interested, Tweek?” Your smile suddenly appeared and you angled towards him, chuckling. “Are you trying to hint that you’re interested?”
“N-no!” Tweek’s face was definitely aflame now. “I was j-j-just curious! T-that’s all!”
“Well you’re the only guy who texts me on a regular basis,” you teased and then leaned back, smile easing up to a more gentle one. “But no, I’ve never had a boyfriend. Why would I need one? I have you two dolts to depend on if I need male muscle.” You sipped your drink again and looked away from the blond, back towards the raven-haired youth sitting across from you. He was staring at you rather pensively, his lips twisted down at the corners. “What, Craig?”
“Nothing,” he responded and went back to his own drink, glancing out the window. “You’re saying there’s no guy who’s shown interest in you?” That question caught you off guard more than Tweek’s had. You hadn’t thought that Craig would give a damn about your social life, let alone the romantic aspect of it. Or lack thereof, anyway.
“Nope,” you responded lightly, attempting to act nonchalant. “Guys just aren’t that into me, I guess. I must be too amazing or something?”
“And there’s no guy you’re interested in?”
It was your turn to pensively stare at Craig. Your brows were pinched and your thoughts were whirling chaotically about in your head. Why was he asking all of these questions? Why did he even care? He had never shown even a vague sense of curiosity in the last two years since you had gone to Chicago. Why was he suddenly wanting to know now? “Craig, are you feeling alright? You’re starting to sound like an actual friend.”
“Ha ha,” Craig muttered. “Funny. Just answer the question.”
“Sure, there’s one guy I’ve liked for awhile.” Fuck it. In a few weeks you weren’t going to see him again for months on end, and by the time you did come face-to-face with him once more, he would probably forget you even hinted at liking him. Craig’s brows shot up and he couldn’t hide the curiosity in his gaze fast enough, though he did try his best. He took a moment to sip at his coffee, though you had a feeling it was more to pretend he wasn’t all that interested in the conversation. Tweek had fallen silent, staring at the both of you with large, round eyes and a partially agape mouth.
“You never thought to tell him you like him?”
“Why would I? He’s not interested in me.”
“How would you know that unless you said something?”
“If he is interested in me,” you began and your eyes had narrowed. “Then why wouldn’t he say something himself?”
There was an awkward silence now. Craig was looking anywhere but at you, while Tweek was studying his fingernails as if they were the most fascinating thing in the room. You scoffed and drank your own beverage, but your eyes didn’t leave the dark haired male in front of you. You were still waiting for an answer. It was starting to become clear-- after a two minute wait-- that Craig had no intention of bringing the topic back up again.
“O-oh!” Tweek jumped to his feet as someone came dashing up to the front entrance of Tweak Bros. “W-welcome to-- o-oh, hi, Clyde.”
“Guys, have you been listening to the radio!?” Clyde asked and he didn’t even stop to listen for an answer, because he dashed into the store and turned on the battered device behind the counter. Tweek was wringing his hands as he hurried forward, attempting to shoo Clyde out from behind the counter. You clambered to your feet and headed over to stand next to the brunette, confused by his abrupt behavior.
You hadn’t seen him in months, and his last text to you had been a week ago. You had figured he’d at least be excited to see you all, maybe say something first, but he was acting frantic. His hair was in disarray and his eyes were bright with anxiety. You turned to the radio, which Tweek had just adjusted so the sound came out clear and crisp. Something brushed against your side and you startled, glancing over to see Craig standing silently next to you. Turning your gaze back to the radio, you waited for the static to finish clearing.
Clyde had turned it to a news station. It was rather odd for him, because he usually only listened to music and didn’t give two craps about the events of the world. You turned to ask him what was going on-- you had even opened your mouth to do so-- when a large horn sound emitted from the device and caused all of you to clap your hands over your ears. “Alert!” came a computerized voice from the machine. “Alert, alert!”
“Clyde--” You cried out, wondering what the fuck was going on. Clyde just hushed you and clamped a hand over your mouth, causing you to yell out muffled words around it. Craig reached out to grasp his hand and fling it off, but Clyde pulled you with him to get out of range.
“Shut up and listen!” Clyde hissed. You fell silent, and Craig dropped his arm, though a lingering look in his eyes hinted at annoyance. It was clear he didn’t like Clyde clamping his hand over your mouth. Both of you shared a look of utter confusion before turning your gazes back to the radio once more. A woman was talking in a fast, frenzied voice and you could barely make out the garbled words she was slurring into the mic.
“An epidemic,” she said and it was one of the only words you caught in her hurried speech. She kept talking and you furrowed your brows, trying to tune your ears more to the sound. “People have been dropping like flies! You are advised to stay indoors until which time we know more about the situation. I repeat, stay indoors until more is known! People are becoming sick and dying out there; you do not want to be caught in the middle of that.”
“Clyde--” You had managed to get his hand partially away from your mouth, trying to speak. He just hushed you again, his arm falling so it was wrapped around your neck instead. It wasn’t a threatening move, and you didn’t feel worried that he had his arm there. It was more like he needed to hold onto something or he would start to fall apart. Craning your head to peer up at his face, you finally noticed how pale he was and the thrown together way he appeared right now. It was as if he had thrown on whatever he could reach and ran right out of his house to the first place he could find.
“Do you know what they’re talking about?” Clyde asked and his eyes swept the room, first to you, then to Craig and Tweek. “Dude, other news stations are reporting it too. It’s not some sickness! Some are saying that the people are dying and then...”
“Then?” You asked and raised your brows at him. Your stomach was knotting itself into an uncomfortable ball and you didn’t like where this conversation was headed. You were starting to get an inkling you knew what Clyde was going to announce.
“They come back!”
“Come back?” Craig sounded less than convinced. “What are you talking about come back?”
“Zombies.”
The next few moments passed in utter silence. Nobody moved, except Clyde who clutched you tighter. You were now squirming to get away from him so you could face him directly. More than anything you wanted to see the expression on his face after announcing something so insane like that. Craig stepped forward and reached out, pulling Clyde’s arm off of you so you could move away. Clyde allowed you to go and his arm dropped limply to his side, as he watched each of you absorb what he just said.
“Did you get drunk last night?” Craig was the first to react. You and Tweek were still just staring numbly at the brunette. “Because this sounds like one of those stupid things you would talk about after you got drunk.”
“I’m not fucking drunk!” There was a pause. “Okay, I had like three drinks last night, but that’s not impairing me so much that I think we’re having a zombie apocalypse right now! I fucking know we are, dude! It’s all over the news!”
“Maybe we should knock him over the head with something,” you mused as you tapped your lower lip, debating. “When he wakes up he’ll see reason and realize he was temporarily insane there for a little bit.”
“Tweek, do you have a TV in this place, man?” Clyde rounded on the blond. Tweek jumped, startled that someone was suddenly forcefully talking to him, but he was quick to reply.
“Y-yeah!” He replied and nodded furiously. “It’s in the back! M-my parents don’t like to k-keep it in the front.”
“Come on,” Clyde snapped and shoved his way past the door leading to the back, even though Tweek instantly started protesting. He was probably worried his parents wouldn’t like non-workers back there. You sighed and followed along behind Clyde, allowing Craig and Tweek to bring up the rear. “Let me just get this piece of junk onto the right station and then you guys can see as well as hear.”
“Do you think this is some mass prank?” Craig asked and you glanced over at him, raising a brow. He stared back at you, nonplussed. “We’re from South Park. You can never put it past them not to pull a mass prank like this.”
“Does this seem like something Stan’s gang would do?” You weren’t so sure. Cartman was more for world domination than zombies, and the others seemed sensible for the most part. Why would anyone want others to believe the end of the world was nearing? Craig shrugged. Tweek just looked panicked. You hoped for his sake that zombies weren’t suddenly cropping up. You weren’t sure Tweek could handle himself in that kind of situation.
“There!” Clyde yelled as he finally got the TV tuned to a good news channel. The pictures that were flooding the screen, the video clips... well, they were horrifying. It really did look like a zombie outbreak. There was a lot of screaming in the background as a news reporter-- looking harried and disheveled-- explained that outside the news building in Denver, it was mass panic and slaughter. “Do you believe me now?” Clyde asked quietly as you all soaked it in.
“I-I don’t think h-he’s lying a-anymore,” Tweek whispered and his voice sounded horrified. Turning to look at him, you saw his face was pasty white and it appeared as if any second he was going to faint. He clutched a table nearest him to keep himself upright, gulping down loud rasping breaths of air to try and steady himself with. “I-I think t-this i-i-is really h-h-happening..” His stutter was worse than usual, hinting at the nerves rushing through him right now.
“What do we do?” Craig was the first one to ask the serious question. It was floating through everyone’s heads. People joked about this all the time, but no one ever seriously thought it would happen. What does one do during a zombie apocalypse? None of you were prepared for this. Your mind was almost completely blank as you stared at each boy in turn; nothing was whirling in your thoughts, nothing had really settled in yet. What were you all supposed to do?
“We should get back to our parents,” Clyde muttered. “Well, you guys should. Mine are out of town this week. I tried calling them, but their cells are off.”
“My parents went on an overnight trip. They won’t be back until tomorrow afternoon,” you responded. There was a tingling in your fingers that hinted at a rising panic, and your gut was clenching up. Sheer terror was going to be your next reaction, because seriously? How the fuck else does one respond to this sort of shit!?
“Is it still safe in South Park?” Craig asked.
“When I was running here, it was quiet as death out there, man,” Clyde said. “I have no idea. Maybe it’s already happening right now.”
That thought sent shivers down everyone’s spines. “We have to find a place to hole up, at least,” Craig muttered. Clyde cut him off.
“Or get the hell out of here.”
“It might be safer to stay here,” you piped up. “More cut off from the rest of the world, more likely we can hole ourselves up and make a stand. You know?”
“Yeah... maybe...” Clyde didn’t sound that convinced. There was a long moment of silence as the four of you stood there, thinking to yourselves. Your parents... you should call them. Your cell phone was still out in the front; you’d have to do that the very next chance you got. Did they even bring their cells with them? Your parents were known to be ‘oldies’ and choose to leave their phones at home when they went out.
“We should at least try to fortify ourselves somewhere safe, and get as much food as we can.” Clyde finally spoke again and his eyes were hard, determined. “Let’s see if any of the old gang is around. Safety in numbers, right?” He was looking at Craig as he said that.
“Yeah, sure,” Craig replied. He didn’t look or sound convinced, but Clyde looked better now that he had something to do. Clyde nodded firmly, then turned and rushed from the room.
“Meet us back here in an hour, Clyde!” You yelled after him. If the phones weren’t working, then it’d be good to know where to meet up later. Clyde yelled something, but you couldn’t decipher what it was. You hoped it was agreement. You turned to look at your two friends, worry clenching in your gut. “What about us?”
“I’m g-going to c-call my parents,” Tweek muttered and then shuffled to the front, where the phone was. You watched him go before turning your gaze to Craig. He was staring blankly at the TV, which hadn’t been turned off. More pictures and clips were being shown, and looking at it yourself only made your stomach seize even more.
“Craig?”
“Let’s go find weapons.” His voice was soft, and you almost didn’t catch what he was saying. He reached out and grasped your wrist, tugging you towards the front.
“O-okay,” you murmured, and followed along behind him towards his car.