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“Alex, where can we go?”
“That’s not what you asked, you asked where we couldn’t go.”
“I’m regretting that now.” Sabina was regretting involving Alex at all at this point but she had tried to be accommodating. Also he’d shot down her first 4 ideas with very dodgy excuses. She knew he’d traveled a lot internationally and some of his trips hadn’t ended well but this was excessive. “Okay then explain what I’m looking at. Why have you given me 6 different lists?”
“I thought it would be easier to group countries based on why they would be a bad idea. The first list is the easiest. These are countries that won’t allow me in and that I don’t want to visit.”
“Why does the second part matter if you can’t get in then why would it matter if you don’t want to go or vis-a-versa?”
“Well that gets us to list 4.”
“What about lists 2 and 3?”
“Don’t worry we will come back to them. List 4 is countries that won’t allow me in but I would still like to go to. So I’d need to use an alternate identity.”
“Alex, no I'm not helping you cross borders illegally.”
“Of course not I’d be helping you, you're a known associate of mine so you’d need a new identity too. If you’re so against it then we can go back to list 3. That’s the list Australia is on.”
“Yes, care to explain the dubiously titled ‘Countries that WANT me to visit but I don’t want to visit.’”
“Does it need an explanation?” The silence and raised eyebrow got Sabina’s point across but Alex considered his answer for a few seconds before responding.”I’d be detained at the border until someone from the government came to pick me up and then I’d rejoin you a week later.”
“You mean they’d want you to work if you went there.”
“Yeah, part of the agreement with most List 3 countries is that to be allowed back into the country I’d need to provide a favor.”
“Most, so not all of them. Why does that matter?”
“You see the asterix’s,” Sabina hummed in agreement “Those are countries I’ve never visited but have asked if I do visit that I do something for them as a token of good will but since I’ve never been before they are willing to work around my schedule and it wouldn’t have to be as soon as I arrive.”
“Okay so if I’m reading this right then if we travel to Slovenia for example we’d be able to fly in just fine but you’d have to go work in the middle of our vacation.
“Well that would be a bad example because there’s no way to travel directly to Slovenia from the West Coast.”
“Is this where List 2 comes in?”
“Yeah airports are kind of a grey zone, passports get checked and I’d probably get flagged and have to wait with security until it was time to board the next flight but they’ll let me continue to my final destination just as long as my final destination isn’t in that country. So to get to Slovenia we’d have to pass through at least one of the List 2 countries or we could fly directly into Italy or Austria and then drive into Slovenia but they are on Lists 5 and 6 respectively.”
“Alex, why are there some countries you can’t visit until you’re 23.”
“That’s when the statute of limitations will have run out on my crimes in those countries.”
“Alex! That's 5 years away.”
“Yeah it’s a bit of a moving goal post. Depending on work I might have to extend that time frame.”
“And list 6?”
“Those countries' governments will allow me to enter but the agreements are with individuals. If those people lose power then I might not be allowed to enter anymore or they may be moved to another list depending on the new agreement.”
“Alright I give up we’ll just stay in America let’s go to Florida that’s popular for Spring Break.”
“Did you want to go to Miami or Tampa?”
“Does it matter?”
“Wellll…”
“ALEX!"