Chapter Text
Everything seemed like he was back at square one since she died.
Ranboo Belové was a mess before his cousin took him in to take care of him.
Before her, Ranboo was a suicidal teenager who slept most of his days away, therefore skipping school and having horrible grades, and he was overall just in a slump everyday.
Really the only good thing about his life then was his cat, Ender-chest.
On top of that mess, was a another mess of bouncing home to home between his family members as his presence slowly killed them off.
His Mother didn't survive his birth, so it became just him and his Father.
A pressure his father couldn't take apparently, as shortly after, he took his own life.
He stayed with his grandparents, his uncle, his aunt but they all just seemed doomed to die or get horribly sick when Ranboo entered their lives.
But there was a light.
Upon hearing her mother had passed and had been raising her newly discovered cousin, Niki Niachu entered the ring, inserting herself into the fight that was taking care of Ranboo.
Niki— the godsend that she was— wouldn't take no for an answer and convinced Ranboo that she would be okay if he moved in with her.
Ranboo— the absolute idiot that he was— believed it and said yes.
Now, here he is, repeating a cycle he falsely thought he could break. Bringing death wherever he goes and falling into a depression because of it.
Except it feels so, so much worse this time.
Niki raised him since he was fourteen, and had told him that he had so much potential and was bound to do something absolutely amazing.
If not, she at least wanted him to at least finish highschool, that would be perfectly fine with her.
He's got a month until that happens, and that's fine by him.
It gives him enough time to say his goodbyes.
°•⚘•°
Ranboo wakes up in a cold sweat, immediately shooting up in his bed, panting, and waiting for the lingering memories of his most recent nightmare to fade away.
When they do, he's able to register his alarm going off, blasting some Lemon Demon song through his room.
He swipes the screen of his phone to turn it off, and drags himself out of his bed…
The house is so much quieter without her. There's no clanging pans, or sizzling food, or oven timer going off. There's no delicious smell floating through the air, no vintage-sounding indie pop music playing through a speaker.
Just silence and the lingering smell of a strawberry muffin scented candle Ranboo lit to remind himself of her perfume.
He drags himself to the bathroom…
He hasn't gotten rid of any of her stuff from the counter or medicine cabinet. Her mango flavored toothpaste, her toothbrush, her medicines…they're all still there.
Ranboo takes his time taking off his hoodie— a black and white one that she had gotten for him— as he readies himself to shower.
It's the saddest shower he's ever taken, the kind where he just lets the shampoo run down his body until he realized today was important and he needs to look and smell nice.
After quickly brushing his teeth— strawberry toothpaste, fruit flavored toothpaste was he and Niki's thing— Ranboo worked on gathering the different parts of his outfit.
Ranboo thinks back to another thing Niki had said in the hospital: "If I die…" Ranboo didn't want to believe she would. "... don't you dare wear all black to my funeral."
Ranboo, always one to be keeping his promises, picked out a strawberry blonde dress shirt, a pair of black slacks and suspenders, and a red bow tie (one that he struggled to tie for about five minutes).
After running a brush through his black and platinum hair, Ranboo was somewhat satisfied with the way he looked, and made his way to the kitchen.
Niki's apron— a light lavender colored one her fiancé got her— was laid over her chair, the one at the head of the table.
It was just sitting there, as if she was home just a bit ago, cooking dinner, and went out after taking off the apron.
The whole house, everything in it including Ranboo, felt as if it was just there now.
It didn't feel like a home that people lived in anymore, it felt like a museum replica of their house, and Ranboo was looking at everything through slightly stained plexiglass.
Ranboo blinked back tears he's been needing to spill since the moment we woke up, and made himself a Poptart.
When it was done, he tucked it away into a napkin, and grabbed his messenger bag off the back of his chair, the one closest to Niki's on the right.
He put in his phone, earbuds, and sketchbook, and a mechanical pencil, and made sure he had everything, and put on his black dress shoes, then made his way out the door.
Walking away from the house, he noticed his car in the driveway.
Ranboo hadn't driven or trusted a car since Niki's death.
He looked away, and continued his journey to the bus stop.
°•⚘•°
Ranboo was the first one to arrive at the church, which was suitable since he did most of the planning with Niki's fiancé.
He didn't want to sit in a church and think about his grief until people arrived, so he opted to sit on his phone until people started trickling in.
He sat watching Heartstopper on his phone, a bit freeing, allowing him to get some dopamine into his system.
After a cute moment between the fictional couple, Ranboo noticed the time and people would start coming in soon.
He shut off his phone, and decided to pay attention to the order everyone arrived. Doing what he did best: psychoanalyze other people.
As expected, Niki's fiancé, Puffy, was the first guest to enter with her daughter, Drista, and her brother, Schlatt.
Puffy gave Ranboo a bitter-sweet smile, and continued to find a seat near the front. She was probably going to check on him before everything really started.
Niki's friends, Jack and Fundy came in after, and Fundy handed Ranboo two flower bouquets.
Ranboo almost fell apart as he noticed the small gesture of their colors and meanings.
One bouquet was a bunch of white chrysanthemums and black calla lilies, with red calla lilies peppered about the flowers.
The other bouquet was pink hibiscus flowers with more white chrysanthemums peppered in them.
Ranboo got up and hugged Fundy, as a silent thank you and because this was going to be just as hard for him as it would be for Ranboo.
When they departed, Jack put his hand on Ranboo's shoulder, then he and Fundy went to find seats.
Wilbur was next.
Ranboo had always been grateful for Wilbur.
When he was sixteen, he stayed with Wil for five months while Niki went to visit a friend of hers, which came with stories of Death and her lover as Wilbur and Ranboo would stargaze for hours. "There she is up there," He would point to a constellation, "Lady Death, Mother of Stars, dancing with her Angel and their millions of children."
Wilbur cleaned up nice, but still had his worn, brown trench coat over his lavender button up and black tie. A very Wilbur thing to do. Niki would've loved it.
Wilbur saw Ranboo and immediately jogged up to give him a suffocating hug.
Hugs from Wilbur were always nice because the two of them were almost the same height, which was a novelty for Ranboo.
But, Ranboo could feel Wilbur's tears soak through the shoulder of his shirt.
They departed and Wilbur cleaned his glasses off, then looked towards the door.
Trailing him were his brother's, Tommy and Techno.
Techno's frizzy, pink hair was strangled into a messy ponytail, and he looked like he hadn't slept in days, his fists were wrapped in gozz.
Tommy was in a similar state, looking like he hadn't slept much, and his emotional support animal, a black cat called Shroud, was carefully held in his arms. His light pink button up was wrinkled but you wouldn't be able to tell when he had his favorite blue cardigan over it.
Shroud always makes Ranboo wish he'd remember to try and have Enderchest registered as an emotional support animal.
Next was Dream and Foolish, Puffy's kids, who probably only came in later because they needed a minute to gather themselves, seeing as they had lost a motherly figure as much as Ranboo has.
And finally was Quackity, who made his entrance very apparent.
"¡Deberías haberme dicho que no podías atarlo antes de que saliéramos de la casa!" He exclaimed to someone, as he walked backwards focused on tying the tie of whoever he was talking to.
"Primo, you know I can't understand when you talk so fast!" They said—a British accent— just barely keeping up with Quackity, and as they made their way into the main part of the church, they were revealed to be a short brunette. They had a headband that pushed their bangs back and revealed one discolored eye and a massive scar.
When Quackity was done, and satisfied with his work, he stood up straight, still not aware that everyone was staring at him.
"Lo siento, Tubito, I'm just…stressed about this. I said you should have told me you couldn't tie it before we left the house. I turn around and see you in the back seat looking like you're on the verge of tears, tie in your hands, like a sad puppy!" He chuckled, but he was clearly tired and stressed, and needed a break.
Ranboo feels that on a whole nother level.
The now named Tubbo realized the attention he and his cousin brought to themselves and cleared his throat, pointing behind Quackity.
Quackity turned around and was immediately hit with a crowd of eyes.
"Ah, I'm so sorry! Please go back to getting yourselves situated!" He gave another nervous chuckle and loosened his tie.
Ranboo could feel his embarrassment from where he stood. So, he broke the ice.
"Quackity!"
"Ranboo! How are you, man?"
"I could be better I will admit," Ranboo said, try to be light-hearted.
"Ah, I feel that!" Quackity responded, looking away for a bit before snapping back. "Oh! You've never met them, but this is mi Prímo, Tubbo," Quackity said, putting his hand on Tubbo's shoulder.
Ranboo hadn't noticed, but Tubbo had been staring up at Ranboo the whole time he and Quackity were talking, only focusing when he felt Quackity's hand.
"O-oh! Uhm…yup! That's me, Tubbo, Quackity's cousin, the one and only! Well, I mean that I'm the only Tubbo, not Quackity's only cousin- he has plenty of cousins…I should stop talking," The brunette nervously chuckled.
Ranboo chuckled, and outstretched his hand for Tubbo to shake.
He cringed at himself a little
Who my age shakes hands and isn't named Nathaniel, what am I doing, what the hell-
Tubbo grabbed the hand, and gave a firm shake like he was on a mission.
Ranboo retracted his, and Tubbo looked down at his own hand.
"You've got hella soft hands, dude," Tubbo said suddenly, immediately bringing his hand up to his mouth as if to shut himself up.
Ranboo genuinely laughed for the first time in a bit, it felt nice.
Still, he felt empty. He couldn't go home and tell Niki about this, he wouldn't be able to share another joke or funny accident with her again.
Ranboo realized his laugh had faded out, then he excused himself to welcome in other people.
A few more people started trickling in, some of Dream and Foolish's friends, Phil's wife, Kristen, explained that he sent his regards but he couldn't catch a plane back home from his business trip in time.
Ranboo was right to think Puffy would check on him before the ceremony started, as she had gotten up from her seat to see if he was okay.
That was Puffy, even in complete devastation, she was taking care of people who needed it.
Ranboo allowed himself this help, and bent down to give her a hug. It hurt his spine, but he couldn't care any less.
They departed, and Ranboo went to the back seats to gather his stuff and move it to the front so he could sit with Puffy, Dream, Foolish, and Drista.
Everyone chatted a bit more before the priest showed up, and at that Ranboo let out a sigh of relief.
The mingling part of funerals always felt awkward. There was an elephant in the room, the reason everyone was here, but everyone just had to squeeze around it until the ceremony reminded them.
The priest began speaking after some somber piano music and a few more pictures of Niki on the projector behind him. Ranboo tuned him out completely, he knew Puffy would let him know when he had to go up.
In the middle of his dissociation, Puffy tapped Ranboo on his shoulder to let him know it was his turn to say a few words. She was standing up, so Ranboo deduced that she had just spoken.
After nodding his head, Ranboo walked up to the platform area ahead of him.
He grasped the microphone, closed his eyes, and took a deep breath.
And then the world went dark.
When Ranboo was done speaking it was like he was tossed back into his own body. He assumes everything went well though because people were clapping as he walked down from the platform back to his seat.
Puffy wiped her eyes and sniffled, then she gave Ranboo the biggest hug someone her size could give someone his size.
The rest of the Captaín family moved from their seats to join in this hug.
Ranboo could tell he stuck out like a sore thumb, he was one of the only ones besides Foolish who wasn't blonde and he towered over everyone in the hug.
Still, this felt like his family if only for a bit.
Living doesn't last forever, neither will this hug, and neither will Ranboo.
But this moment can last for just a bit longer.
Eventually, the hug departs, and Puffy reaches to hold Ranboo's hand. She reminds him of Niki, of a mother figure.
It's a selfish thought really, thinking of Puffy as a mom. He doesn't want to put that on her, and if the feeling becomes mutual and she thinks of him as her son, it'll be so much worse for both of them when Ranboo is gone.
Puffy doesn't deserve to lose anyone else. Puffy doesn't deserve the risks that come with loving Ranboo.
She stands on her tiptoes indicating she has to tell Ranboo something, he gets this signal and leans down.
When they're at the same level, Puffy looks at Ranboo with the most serious and yet sweet look ever.
Now with both of her hands on his cheeks, she says "You know you can stay with us anytime you want, right, dear?"
And Ranboo breaks.
He had been breaking ever since he met Puffy.
When she made Niki happy, when she was there with Ranboo as the life faded from Niki's eyes, when they shared tears, and laughs, and time together.
Ranboo had always been fond of Puffy, but something about their dynamic clicked when Niki passed. They became closer, bonded over a tragedy.
And Ranboo was trying not to get too attached. Puffy doesn't deserve it.
But she offered him comfort, and a shoulder to cry on, and now she is offering him her home.
Her home she shares with her kids who are just as close to Ranboo, a home she shares with her brother who Ranboo doesn't know too well but knows he's a recovering alcoholic. A home she shares with her family.
She is opening the opportunity to join that family.
"You okay, Ranboo?" She asked, pulling him from his daze.
He knew the answer. He knew he was glossy eyed and going to stutter his way through whatever he says next.
"I'm uh…yeah. Y-yeah, I think I'm okay."
Finally the two sat down, they were probably quite the spectacle to whoever wasn't paying attention to the priest speaking in the front.
Quite the spectacle to a certain brown haired boy sitting in the third row with his cousin.