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Since I was little I heard your exploits and my admiration for you began, and when I became your apprentice it was like a gift from Star Clan with you I could be the strongest cat our clan has ever seen, over time I developed other kinds of feelings asia you
Every night in the apprentices' den I wanted you to be next to my bed sharing our warmth, in our training I always tried to do my best to show you that I was the best. Maybe that way one day you would notice me.
When I suffered my accident I felt helpless, my dreams of being the best warrior for the clan were unfairly frustrated, maybe if I had obeyed you nothing would have happened. But despite everything I would not want to change anything. Despite everything, you and Yellowfang were always there for me, giving me unconditional support, which only made my love for you grow.
After becoming Yellowfang's apprentice I knew I could never be with you, that made me feel bad but I knew it was my destiny to love you but never be reciprocated . Over time that sadness faded but anger invaded me when I began to notice that every time you spent more time with Sandstorm, although I could not judge you, she was beautiful, she seemed like an angel with a warrior character. I tried to stay strong I had accepted this and I couldn't force you to love me.
I was devastated with the death of Silverstream it was hard losing my first cat, I lost confidence in myself I felt that I could have done more if Yellowfang had gone instead of me maybe he could have been saved. You and yellow jaws made me believe in myself again I understood that Silverstream dying was not my fault, her death was not in my paws.
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When Bluestar died and you took her place, we became more united thanks to the connection of healer and leader.
On the trip to the moonstone I could feel your anguish was normal just a short time after you held the position of leader. After finishing the ceremony, I tried to comfort you as best I could. I didn't know what you had seen there, but what mattered most to me was that you were okay.
I felt so happy because you turned to me for comfort with the dreams that the stellar clan sent you, even though I had no answers for you, you always came back to me but in turn each day you were closer to Sandstorm until the about to share a nest with her. There was no doubt that you loved only her, as you looked at her your eyes lit up just by smelling her.
My chest compressed every time that happened, I wanted you to give me that look, I wanted to be the cat that would steal your sighs of love just as you stole them from me.
With the threat of Tiger Star I saw that you were filled with anguish
In the fight with the shadow clan, I was greatly distressed to see you fight with those big and wild cats thirsty for blood.
-scourge dead !!-.
It was the announcement that made the war stop.
I felt the urge to run to you to rub my head on your chest, but I knew I shouldn't. Although he did not stop me from rubbing our Jaws . But that happiness faded to see you go with Sandstorm.
-I love you Sandstorm-.
They were your words. I felt that my heart fell into my stomach but it was fine, your destiny was to be with her and be happy and that didn't bother me, the only thing I want is to see you happy even if it's not with me.
Moons ago I realized you would never love me Firestar and that's okay.