Chapter Text
“Oh, no you don’t!” Enid mutters under her breath, eyes narrowing on the tarasek that tries to go after her healer. She smashes taunt until it turns to her and keeps a tight grip until the hunter kill shot’s it. “Hell yeah! Not so cocky now, huh, you motherfucker?” She moves to the double boss, the final one in this dungeon, and calls it to her.
She keeps her eyes on the game, not willing to get distracted by her chat or the–
Her iPad pings.
“Well hello there, pretty lady,” she flicks her eyes to her tablet, where she has Dorothy’s Roulette set up. She’d been kinda reluctant to try it out when one of her viewers suggested it a few weeks ago, but she’s liking it so far, meeting some really interesting people. The greasy, sweaty dude with leering eyes is certainly not one of them. She can’t see his lap, the image ends at his bare, hairy, greasy chest, but she can see his arm moving and flexing. Revulsion sweeps through her faster than a roadrunner. It’s so strong that she actually gags.
“Oh my Goddess,” she snatches her hand away from the keyboard and swipes him away, returning just in time to move away from the fireball Kyrakka sends her way. “Is Giddy here? I’m taking back what I said, DR isn’t fun. I think I just got an STI from looking at that guy,” she gags again and makes a disgusted face at the camera.
The chat is exploding with grossed-out and puking emojis, her iPad’s screen being linked into her set up as a little window next to the one that shows her own image, so they all saw the same thing she did. She finishes the fight, whopping when she sees the wavy horns manuscript for her velocidrake, and says thanks and goodbye to the team before exiting the dungeon and finally looking at her chat, absently noting that she has three more viewers than when she last checked.
DuskSesame: 🤢🤮🤢🤮
Yirigusss: well, that was incredibly traumatizing…
GiddyB¡tch: That has never happened to me!!! I recommended this app because it’s for LGBTQA+ people!!! And the developers take this kind of crap really seriously! Report him!
Tritonium: 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Fivvvy: hey! you finally got the manuscript! Congrats!
GiddyB¡tch: Like, everything is recorded so if you report it they review your claim and the user gets blocked.
“Hmm… ok, I’ll forgive you. Let me just…” She leans over to the tablet where the Searching for open chats still bounces around the screen and clicks on the History Tab. “OMG even his user name gives me the creeps,” She taps the cogwheel next to Big_D_Daddy and then the red Report . Then promptly laughs at the reasons presented. “Definitely ‘Creepy straight dude’,” She taps that one and goes back to the game. “Ok, what should we do next?” she asks as she flies over to Valdraken’s Rostrum to put the new horns in.
Yirigusss: sidequests?
BubblyBoo: Racing
DFG23: I think there’s a storm fury going on
“Oh, Storm Fury! Hell yeah, let’s do that! I need more essence for the mount,” she mounts and flies up, swooping around the arches to gain speed and then waving around the trees before flying up and onto the golden platform next to the portal.
Her iPad pings. She turns and can’t help but grin at the sight. A cat is lounging right in front of the camera, and she can barely see a head of unruly hair peeking up from behind it. It raises, and a girl that looks to be around ten grins at her.
“Hi! Your hair is very pretty!”
“Thank you! So is yours! And your kitten too! What’s their name?”
“Oscar! Say, do you know what DNA is made of?”
“Uhh… nucleotides, I think?” She checks her chat and sees a bunch of yeses and yeps. “Yeah, nucleotides.”
The girl giggles out a ‘thanks’ and leans back down. It’s then that it dawns on Enid that she’s talking to a child , and she clearly remembers the app having a +16 requirement.
“Should you be on this app, hun? How old are you?” the giggling stops, and the girl looks at her with wide eyes before swiping her away and the Searching for open chats starts bouncing around her screen once more.
SicklyGoof: BUSTED
GiddyB¡tch: her face when you asked her age XDXDXD
Enid makes a ‘what can you do’ face at her camera and enters the portal. Not even a second passes that Soridormi tells her the portals are closed, but the Primalists have awoken the monster. “Hah! Well, that was fast,” she immediately flies over, only to groan so loud she fears she peaks her mike. “No! Not the ice one!”
DFG23: Don’t be a baby!
FluffOff: cmon Enid you can do it!!!!!!!
BubblyBoo: I hate this one too, it’s such a pain
“Right? It’s like, the Earth one is super chill, the wind one just has the big ass area and then nothing, but this one? Ugh!” she makes another face at the camera and swipes at the elemental; she drops a heat source to keep the cold at bay. Soon enough the aegides appear, and she switches over to the closest one, having to move constantly to avoid all the goddess-damned areas that keep popping up and down. “I hate you,” she growls as she heals from the area that explodes on her face. So concentrated is she on avoiding death that she doesn’t notice the ping from her iPad and her chat going wild.
GiddyB¡tch: HOLY SHIT IS THAT WHO I THINK IT IS?????
Paablitoo: pretty
DuskSesame: is it me or is that viper the la muerte
SicklyGoof: OMGOMGOMG ITS WEDNESDAY ADDAMS!!!!!
“UGH, just die already, you motherfucker!” Enid shouts, smashing at her keys.
“You do realize that pressing the keys harder won’t impact anything, right?”
Enid freezes. She knows that voice. She’s watched both movies four times, each. She has all five books, three of them signed. She’s watched interviews and conferences. She turns to her iPad and there she is: Wednesday Addams. Looking at her, one eyebrow raised, head tilted slightly to the side.
“Uhh… hi?” she squeaks out, face burning and mouth gaping open.
“Hello.”
“... hi!”
DFG23: I think this is gay panic 2.0
DuskSesame: Enid you’re dying
GiddyB¡tch: ENID MOVE!!!
Tritonium: MOVEMOVE
FluffOff: MOVE
Fivvvy: MOVE
FluffOff: MOVE
Yirigusss: ENID MOVE
FluffOff: MOVE
“Wha–” Enid doesn’t think she’s ever seen her chat move so fast. Then what they say registers and looks up at her screen to see her character about to die, red pulsing at the edges of the screen. “CRAP, CRAP, CRAP!!!” she scrambles to press Tiger Dash, but it’s too late. Her health drops to zero, and her worgen shifts back to its OG form only to swing around and drop, its whimper echoing through the speakers.
GiddyB¡tch: LOL death by gay panic
Fivvvy: RIP Enid, death by hot goth butch
Yirigusss: seems fitting tbh
DuskSesame: XDXD
“S-Sorry, I just… you’re Wednesday Addams”
“Correct. What of it?” Enid gapes.
“What do you mean, ‘what of it’!? You’re like, my hero! I’ve been obsessed with your book saga ever since the first one dropped! And the movies, holy shit! Like, it’s not as good as the books because a lot has to get cut out, but you’re amazing in those too! I’m such a fan!”
DuskSesame: Simp mode: activated
FluffOff: same, enid, same
“That’s pleasant to hear. I have to admit, you’re the most agreeable person I’ve met in this cursed app,”
“If you don’t like it then why are you using it?” Enid moves her iPad so it’s next to her computer screen and respawns. If she’s quick about it she may still loot the goddess-damned boss.
“I lost a bet with my brother. For the next week, I’m required to do two hours of an activity of his choice. Today: talk to strangers on a platform designed for queer people because, and I’m quoting here, ‘being a hermit is not sexy’,”
“Well, I don’t know, you look pretty great to me!” Enid grins down at the smaller screen while half her neurons run around in a panic inside her head. Wednesday’s right eyebrow raises, and the other half has a small heart attack.
Fivvvy: DAYUM ENID’S GOT GAME!!!!
GiddyB¡tch: that was gay
BubblyBoo: Smooth
“Be that as it may,” Wednesday continues, “I still have an hour to go, and as I said, you’re the most pleasant so far. So, what are you doing?”
“I’m playing World of Warcraft,” loot acquired, Enid exits the Primalist Future and returns to Valdrakken. “It’s an online game where you create characters, level up, explore, do dungeons and raids… you can also do PvP but I’m not really a fan of that.”
“Interesting.”
“Would you like to play with me?” does she sound eager? Well, she is. Incredibly. WoW is her favorite game and not many of her friends also play. Getting to play with Wednesday Addams is a dream come true “You have to pay for a monthly subscription to get to where I am, but you can make an account and level up a character up to level twenty to test it out for free!”
“...Sure, why not. I still have an hour to go. Let me get my laptop,” once gone, Enid turns to her camera, eyes wide and mouth open.
“Oh. My. Goddess,” she whisper-shouts. Her chat seems equally flabbergasted.
“Ok, we’re all set! Let’s get started!”
Enid is bouncing on her chair. She’s about to play World of Warcraft, one of her favorite games, with Wednesday freaking Addams aka her hero aka the author of her #1 favorite book series aka the hottest actress in the world. So... yeah, she’s excited, sue her. Her chat has been saying ‘SIMP’ over and over for around ten minutes now, but fuck them.
Wednesday is set up with her own Battle.net account, has downloaded the game, and is currently watching the Dragonflight trailer with wide eyes and a tilted head. “These are incredible graphics.”
They really are. Enid has watched all the trailers about a dozen times each.
They create new characters together: Enid chooses a human hunter, because she wants to try out the survival spec and wants the human heritage armor, and Wednesday –after almost ten minutes of deliberation and reading all the descriptions while Enid entertains her chat– chooses a draenei rogue, because the impossibility of a hooved being managing to sneak around, and Enid’s frustrated rant about it, are incredibly amusing.
They obviously go to the Forgotten Reach so they can play together and Enid takes great pleasure in teaching Wednesday everything she can. She also talks about the backstory as much as she can without giving Wednesday any major spoilers, mainly the important story characters and how the game has progressed in the broadest terms she possibly can. She also gives her a brief description of what sets each expansion, from The Burning Crusade all the way to the current one, Dragonflight.
“I don’t like the way this is set up. I want it like you,” Wednesday complains ten minutes into the game as they kill a quillboar, her gauntlet-shaped mouse moving around the screen, so Enid directs her to the Edit Mode and they arrange her interface just like Enid’s. “He sounds ridiculous,” she adds once they rescue Lindie and he makes them get onto one of his contraptions.
“All gnomes sound ridiculous, Wednesday, wanna know why?”
“Hmm?”
“They are ridiculous,” Wednesday snorts, and Enid feels like she’s won a contest. No, she’s not obsessed. That snort was adorable and the little stutter in her chest is totally justified.
Yirigusss: GNOME BASHING TIME!!!
Tritonium: Ok, I’m out of here 😩😒
Enid giggles but decides not to go on another tangent of her completely unfounded beef with gnomes. For now. They keep playing together, separating only to complete their class-specific quests. Enid has a mini meltdown when she sees her new pet, a grey wolf with blue bands that she absolutely loves and will never replace. She names her Tofu.
By the time they reach level ten, kill the dragon, and are carted off the island, Enid is convinced Wednesday is hooked. And after, when they complete Val’sharah’s questline and Wednesday tells her to leave it there so their levels stay the same, Enid whoops and does a little dance on her chair.
“Another one converted into the dark side!”
“I admit, I have never felt so many emotions while playing a game, and I didn’t have a truly deep connection with the dragon. I look forward to continuing the story,” Wednesday says as she closes the app, their characters safely resting in Stormwind. “When are you next free? Preferably during at least two hours so we can have a decent amount of time in?”
She’s dreaming. Enid is totally dreaming.
“Well, I work from home and I manage my own schedule, so whenever you want, really,”
“Does the day after tomorrow at ten sound acceptable?”
“Uhh… yeah, yeah! Totally!”
“Perfect. I’ll send you a private message through this infernal app. I must attend to business now. It was a true pleasure.”
And with that, she’s gone, and Searching for open chats bounces around Enid’s screen once more. She shuts it down and listens to the music of the game for a few seconds before looking up at her camera.
“Well, that happened… I wasn’t hallucinating, right? That was Wednesday Addams… right?”
It’s then that Enid finally notices how big her audience is. She blinks down at the number, stupified, as the chat zooms by, just then noticing all the unfamiliar names.
Now, Enid isn’t a full-time streamer, she doesn’t even have a set schedule except her Saturday evening/Sunday morning binge sessions, and her followers consist of her friends and about a hundred more people. Her usual audience tends to range from ten to forty people at a time with the four or five activities she usually does on stream, and last she checked she had eleven subs. Right now, she has two thousand viewers, and her followers have tripled.
“Holy shit, where did you all come from?!” she squeaks, and for the first time in her life, she has trouble reading her chat with how fast it’s going.
Fannnyy: Twitter
Duncan89: Saw on Twitter that Wednesday Addams was playing WoW. Had to see for myself.
Secilinia: Someone posted on Tumblr that Viper de la Muerte was playing a videogame on Twitch
WhyBother: twitter told me to come
Viv2002: Came to see if Viper de la Muerte was actually playing WoW. Stayed because I like your style.
“How…? Twitter? Tumblr?”
GiddyB¡tch: It was us. You’re welcome, Enid!
FluffOff: You’re welcome, babe! It’s about time people found out how much of a gem you are!
DuskSesame: MAKE SURE TO FOLLOW AND GET YOURSELVES A SUB FOR ENID’S CHANNEL!!! SHE WORKS TOO MUCH AND DESERVES TO BE ABLE TO PLAY MORE!!!
“Dusk, don’t you dare! No need for that! I work fine, I have a schedule so I don’t overwork myself, ignore them! Holy shit, ok. Honestly, this is kind of intimidating, I didn’t even notice everyone coming uhh… So… Thanks for watching, I guess? I’m not that big of a streamer, I just set it up whenever I feel like it; it’s mostly WoW but I also stream DnD sessions, Rimworld, and other games that my friends recommend… not much else to say… Goddess, this is awkward,” she giggles, feeling incredibly self-conscious. Reassurances from her regulars start pouring in, hearts and kissy faces abound.
BubblyBoo: You’re doing great, hun!
WhyBother: Honestly, I couldn’t have asked for a better and more succinct presentation. I’ll definitely come watch whenever you feel like streaming
Yirigusss: 😘❤️😘❤️😘❤️
Lignuss22: are you gonna stream the next session with Addams???
“Thanks, WhyBother, that feels nice to hear. Uhh… I’m not sure if I’ll stream on Thursday; as I said I only stream when the mood strikes and if it does I’ll have to ask her too if she’s ok with me streaming. She said it was fine today but I was already on stream when we started playing, I don’t know how she’ll feel then. We’ll see. I have to get going now, I’m already running a bit late. See ya all soon!”
And with that and a final wave at the camera, she ends the stream. Blowing out a deep breath she gets up from her chair, stretches until her back releases a few satisfying pops, and grabs her phone. The second she takes it out of Streaming Focus messages start pouring in, as well as missed calls and failed Face Times. Before she can read anything though, her phone rings, and Bestest Bestie , accompanied by a picture of her and Yoko’s faces smushed together to fit into the photo, flash on her screen.
“Enid. Bestie. Sister. Platonic love of my life. Who did you just spend three hours playing with???”
“Uhh…”