Chapter Text
One day, SD-OC decided he'd bring in a bunch of drones to react to their future, because he feels sad for N. N needs to have his future known, so he cannot make same mistakes and become happy. Oh yeah, also Riley. Riley is awesome. What's what? Everyone else? Okay fine, they'll react to their future too.
SD-OC called out for the N Plushies, the Uzi Plushies, and the V Plushies to assemble.
"Nuuu!" declares the N Plush, giving a salute.
"Uzeee!" the Uzi Plush gives it's response with a foot stomp to emphasize it's word.
"Veeeveee!" V Plush is happy.
SD-OC nods in approval at their rapid response, "Alright, N Plushies, you set up the theatre, we need like... thirty seats... separated into two groups. Three on one side. I don't want to risk the murder drones eating the worker next to them."
He turns to Uzi Plushies, "You, take your sisters and find some oil packets for our... guests. They'll be very thirsty and we need to pacify them."
He finally glances over towards the V Plush, which stares up at him with gleaming eyes, eager to do whatever is asked.
SD-OC scratches his head, pondering for a moment, then raises his finger, "Yes! We need a large TV! Acquire the biggest, 16K Ulta-Resolution Flatscreen you can find V Plushies!"
V Plushies simultaneously grinned before zipping away to rob a supermarket.
SD-OC meanwhile, gathered up a set of DvDs... for the cast introduction, there shall be the simple teaser. Then the episodes will follow. But before that he needs some, you know, funny fan content to make them react to. Until those become available.
...Some time passes and everything is set up.
SD-OC checks the time, "An hour behind schedule, good!" he snaps his fingers, but nothing happens, "Oh, forgot I'm not an omnipotent being. Be right back."
He ninja-vanishes and speeds across the galaxy and transcends dimensions. Until finally... he acquires the guests he desires.
He grabs Thad, Lizzy, Doll, Uzi, Khan, and Riley from the worker drone side (with some extra worker drones just because). SD-J, SD-V, and SD-N from the disassembly drone side. Then yeeted them into this theatre on Copper-9 and clapped his hands twice so the Plushies take that as their cue to lock the doors and guard all exits. This theatre is locked down tighter than V's claws around a worker drone's neck!
"Whoa..." Thad is disoriented, "Chad hits harder than I thought." he must still be in a doozy.
Lizzy helps up Doll, how nice, but then the two notice the disassembly drones. They're chill, but the other worker drone students were quick to scream, panic, flail. Lizzy could give less of a damn. Doll, is more focused on the one responsible for her woes.
Uzi was unfortunate enough to be right beside them, luckily, unlike humans, drones can't go deaf like humans. But Uzi had to clasp her hands around her non-existent ears because, human or not, being near a bunch of screaming drones hurts.
"AAAGH WHAT THE HELL?!" Uzi bites back a cuss word as she notices the DDs, "Oh, uh..." she looks around, only seats and some popcorn, "Oh crap!" she grabs a carton of popcorn and holds it like as if it were a weapon, '...who am I kidding what's paper carton gonna do against a murder drone?' spur of the moment, yeah. Nice try though Uzi. Maybe if you're lucky N will die from allergies... oh wait, drones don't have allergies to popcorn. Oh well, props for trying.
Khan attempts to calm the workers, by suggesting they build a door.
Teacher shrugs, uncaring that danger is just a couple meters from them, taking another sip from his mug of... coffee? Tea? Who knows what he drinks. It could be root beer or black engine oil.
SD-J is peeved by all the noise, quite a nuisance, but that turned annoyance turned to sadistic delight at the amount of worker drones presented before her. SD-V looks far worse, she is already in attack mode and charging at poor Uzi.
However, she realized something, her swipe was... just a slap across the face. Uzi realized that SD-V lacks her claws, her wings... all she has is her tail and SD-V was not quick enough to realize this as Uzi tackled her with a mighty battle cry.
Uzi attempts to punch SD-V in the face, but SD-V manages to grab and throw Uzi into a seat, breaking it because murder drones throw harder than a human, that's for sure.
"UGHFU!" Uzi doesn't seem like she took lethal damage, she's just dazed, "Ugh, worst quick time decision ever."
Thad went to assist Uzi, because he's not a jerk, while SD-N went to help SD-V, but SD-V needs no help.
Luckily before SD-V could stab Uzi through the face, SD-OC came charging in and tackles SD-V, "NO KILLING GUESTS ON THESE HOLY GROUNDS!"
"Holy crap they talk!" shouts Uzi at seeing Serial Designation OC speak.
SD-N is quick to help out his crush, "Hey! Don't touch V!" he grabs SD-OC, but SD-OC has his entire arsenal and just unfurls his wings and smacks SD-N into Khan.
Khan is unconscious, he must have fainted from shock from PTSD, or from impact.
SD-N stands up and notices the cowering worker drones, and notices how there's literally an entire table with the WDF still at their seats with cards in hand, only their expressions are one of sheer mortification, "Oooh, deal me in I love rummy!"
Todd, the worker drone defense force guy whose relatively relaxed considering the situation, chuckles, "Actually, it's called gin rummy? It's easy to confuse the two I know."
Alf tackles SD-N and pulls back the rack, chambering a round and pointing his rifle to N's face, "Calm down buddy. I don't want to waste bullets on you."
SD-N quickly flings Alf off by flipping himself back up. Alf lands on his feet, only for SD-J to attempt to sting him with her stinger. Keyword, attempted, because he came around and blocked it using his AK's bayonet.
"Your defiance won't save you little toaster." snarls J, bringing up her fists, as if she could face a space vietnam war vet in hand to hand.
Alf chuckles, "I ain't no kitchen appliance girl, I've killed drones worse than you."
However the N Plushies in the room restrained SD-J, while a bunch of V Plushies pulled SD-N back. He didn't seem to resist that much and seemed more confused if anything at the sight of being dragged to a seat by mini-Vs.
After some effort, the workers were put on the left side of the room, with the disassembly drones on the right.
SD-OC wipes off non-existent sweat and breathe a sigh of relief, "FINALLY! Your all in your seats."
Alf has his rifle pointed at SD-J, from a safe distance of thirty yards. Without their wings and boost ability, they can't make a sudden lunge to cover that distance so he should be able to land a hit. Though the ones restraining her and SD-V are N Plushies. SD-N himself is just, drinking an oil packet of pure refined golden brown oil, fresh from the refinery, while hugging a V Plush with his free hand.
Once things had settled down, namely the worker drones stop screaming or pleading for IC-0N or whatever to save their robot souls, they became confused, if not just outright accepting of the situation in Riley's case.
Khan was awoken by Riley smacking the guy in the back of the head, hand to head does wonders for drones.
SD-OC claps his hands, "DRONES PLEASE! Let's be civil!"
Alf the worker drone pulls back the rack and chambers a round into his AK rifle, for effect.
The disassembly drones, seemed to struggle, but SD-N just accepted the situation and slurps up the oil. Screw California law if N wants a straw he gets a straw.
SD-N then realizes, "Wait, this is... brown?" he realizes the color of the oil and turns to the... rogue disassembly drone in the room.
SD-OC shrugs, "Oil's natural color. Commonly brownish gold, but the color varies depending on the additional chemicals, but most oils you encounter are a kind of smooth brownish gold. Black usually means it's contaminated, old, used too much."
SD-N mouths 'Oooh' and then realizes something, "Wait, does this mean we've been drinking the human equivalent of-" N realizes he's likely been drinking what might as well be worker drone piss, "Biscuits..." poor N.
SD-V suddenly reared back, disgust all over her face, "What?! EW!" the realization hits hard.
SD-J looks, unaffected, she's just glaring at SD-OC, "Don't listen to this traitor! It's attempting to deceive you idiots! The company uses renewable oil, it's safe to consume! It has no drawbacks despite its visual similarity to crude oil. Our nanites would refine it regardless."
SD-OC barked out a laugh, "I have absolutely nothing to gain from lying! But if you want, whatever, I mean the company does use a special brand of oil meant to last for a hundred cycles, or so they claim. I forget if it's supposed to be black or not, but nobody likes the color of brownish gold, but c'mon! Your my guests! You deserve the best drinks on hand!"
SD-N seems to be simply in a higher state of mind drinking this refined oil, to put it lightly, I don't want to use a more vulgar word, "May I have some more, please?" he is very polite.
"Sure thing bud!" SD-OC tosses another packet which N catches.
"Thanks!" N is grateful, but gets smacked by J whose face is marred by a scowl.
"YOU IDIOT! Don't just drink what that rogue asset gives you!"
N looks like he's ascending by his expression, "But, it's oil, pure, refined, succulent, beautiful, smooth, silky oil!"
N then realizes something, "Wait, now that I analyze this pack of oil..." he cradles his chin with a hand, "Doesn't this have plastic casing? I thought we were hot enough to melt this kind of material upon contact?"
SD-OC shrugs, "Overheating isn't an issue here. So you can hug a human and not melt their skin off their bones."
SD-N nods in understanding, "Cool, uh so-"
"HEY BIG GUY! WHAT ABOUT US?!" Uzi please, there is time for us all to hear our thoughts.
SD-OC glances over to the workers who are just, looking at the DDs as if expecting an attack. Uzi appears to be the only one voicing her thoughts, the others are still cautious or just accepting everything (Riley).
SD-OC throws them packets of oil, "I already swapped out your oil. Your good as new. But in case you want-"
Teacher raises his hand, SD-OC points over at him, "I would like some coffee." suddenly coffee splats into his mug. Riley just looks at his mug, shrugs, and picks it up. He just rolls with life like a true depressed teacher.
Alf steps forward, "Your all here to view your future, okay? We got this big HD 8k resolution TV here and it wasn't cheap. Any questions, raise your hands."
Everyone turns their attention to Alf. Several hands raise, mostly from the worker drone side.
SD-J attempted to lunge out again breaking out of the N Plushies stubby little grip, but SD-OC tackles her down and yeets her back into the seat. The N Plushies get a better grasp on her.
"Stay." SD-OC orders, with the most serious expression he can muster.
SD-J snarls, while restrained she can still voice her complaints, "Obstruction of the company's-"
SD-OC groans, interrupting her, "I hear enough of that from my own team, just sit tight and after you see the episodes, then you can decide if you want to kill the workers in the room, alright? Promise me that?"
The worker drones, namely Uzi, voice their complaints.
SD-J scoffs, "If you think you have any authority over us-"
Alf rolls his eyes, "Future vision is good for us all. Let's just watch the stuff already!" he really doesn't want to be here. Security detail duty without pay sucks when you need to look after a human racist midget whose just annoying without their railgun and very insane killer adults.
"...So." Uzi's voice turns everyone's attention to her, she shrinks down somewhat, 'Geeze I just wanted to ask... what's with this attention?!'
Alf raises an eyebrow, "Yes?"
"I- we, are going to see our future, is that what you said?" Uzi seems, curious.
Alf nods, "Yes, we, or more like you all, will see your future. I'm just here to make sure the DDs in the room don't fook everything up. Namely by killing you guys. Designation OC here wanted equal viewing by equal folks. Just having worker drones here would not do much, and swaying the minds of disassembly drones seems viable."
SD-OC nods, "Yep! Now, if you guys are really nice we might invite some additional guests for you to meet!" yeah like T-Dolls and Droids and other robots. What fun. Or maybe others, like Uzi's mom, if we ever hear how she was or what she looks like.
Suddenly a door at the end of the theatre opens up, a Misaka Sister enters and notices the guests have arrived, "Oh, is Misaka interrupting something? Asks Misaka feeling unnerved at the sudden attention."
SD-OC waves his hand dismissively, "Oh no! You arrived just in time! Brought the DvDs?"
The Misaka Sister holds up an N Plush, which is holding a V Plush, which is holding an Uzi Plush, which is holding a DvD labeled 'Murder Drones'. Talk about a pyramid of success.
The worker drones, majority wise, are still coping and somewhat panicking. At least the screaming stopped so they're mostly just, looking at the disassembly drones, prepared to throw popcorn at them need be. Khan seems to be shaking, as if he's having a PTSD attack, in fact it's implied in canon he may have some PTSD from that time and this may affect him to a degree.
Uzi, however, is uncertain how to react at the plush version of herself, "...What is that?" she just noticed the plushies.
The Uzi Plush hops out of the V Plush's stub arms and walks over to the disc player and shoves the disc in, quite literally. Through sheer brute force.
"Uzeee!" the Uzi plush yells as it shoves the disc into the player.
Now the drones are confused. Uzi even more so at the thing's language.
"...What's with the dolls?" SD-V is not sure how to react when she doesn't know what a dvd player even is.
An N Plushy, wanders over to N.
N looks down at it, they trade words in silence, then he nods and it hops onto his lap.
"Veee!"
"Nuuuuuu!"
N smiles, 'Aw, they're just so adorable!' he hugs the N and V plush. So adorable.
SD-J looks, pissed off at SD-N warming up to the hosts so easily. SD-V just accepted the situation, but seems bored out of her mind. She can't fight out of this, the darn N Plushies had a strong grip when in group of a dozen.
SD-OC clasps his hands, "OKAY! Now that we are all settled, my name is SD-OC, my assistant here is named Alf, now, let us begin introductions!" he bows his head, and slowly scoots out of view. Alf just stands to the side, rifle at the ready.
The Misaka Sister takes the front of the... theatre? Stage? Whatever you call the front where the big flatscreen 8k ultra resolution TV is.
"Introduce yourselves, or Misaka will have to resort to more direct measures, demands Misaka with impatience." Misaka Sister 15780 is impatient, wow, I never knew.
The workers glance at each other, most wondering who should go first or if they should do it, they don't even know who TF these people are. The disassembly drones, well, they're about as good as you'd think.
Thankfully, SD-N stands up and gives a salute towards, the general audience, "I'm Serial Designation N! Nice to meet you! I uh, normally wouldn't be introducing myself to... worker drones, but hey, I like doing anything!" a glare from SD-J quickly shut him up and he sat back down, sulking. Dang it SD-J let him be happy.
Teacher oddly enough stood up first from the worker drone side of the audience, "I am the one and only teacher of the youth of this outpost..." and sat back down without another word. To the point, I like it.
Uzi grins and stands up, "Uzi, remember it well human, because I'm the one who's going to stop all this pointless murder among drones and kick human ass!" she points dramatic ally to the host up front.
SD-J nearly breaks out of her restraints, oh how she would love to see the oil spurt from Uzi as she cuts her apart in the most agonizing way possible. SD-V also looked equally vexed by Uzi's taunt.
Misaka Sister looks up at Uzi, and blankly replies, "Congratulations, Misaka doesn't give a shit, states Misaka in a tone of indifference."
Uzi is left, cracked, because that was unexpected, "..." Uzi.exe has stopped working.
Thad coughs into his hand, to break the awkward atmosphere, "Name's Thad, just your average jock in school." he gives finger guns at the host. Why are they all giving introductions to the host? I meant- whatever.
"Khan Doorman, I construct doors to protect the outpost from... the very murder drones in the room. Oh, if you'd like any more information regarding doors I am more than happy to-" Khan, stop, that coping process is just depressing.
Misaka raises a hand, thank gosh, "No need, states Misaka not wanting to listen to an essay of useless information."
Khan sulks, doors are not useless info. But, no one else in the room really wants to hear an essay on doors.
SD-V was not talking. But after a moment she sighs, "Okay fine, I'm Serial Designation V, happy now?" she really looks like she just, wants to get out and murder, but can't, so she's just... accepting this.
SD-OC nods on the side, SD-V grins, "I'm going to tear your spine out of your mouth the moment I get my claws back."
SD-OC shakes his head, still smiling, because SD-V just convinced him to not give her any access to her arsenal anytime soon.
SD-J stands up, the N Plushies let go, but stand around her remaining on guard, almost taunting her to try something as they take out an entire armory's worth of weapons. Ranging from a knife to a shotgun to the BFG 5000.
SD-J scowls, "As if I'd try anything with these cloth dolls around." so she takes a deep breath, and does an immediate 180, a hand to her chest and openly declares, "I am Serial Designation J! MVP of the last quarter for the company you once served. If any of you seek assistance with fulfilling the company's objective, I am more than happy to oblige." she gives a short bow at the end.
"As if anyone would just accept death." Alf rolls his eyes, SD-J snarls at his response.
Lizzy and Doll give their introductions, then the other worker drones, and whatever.
After that, Misaka Sister 15780 finds a seat besides Uzi, much to Uzi's annoyance.
Uzi doesn't look to happy sitting beside a human.
"Your thinking something bad about Misaka, aren't you? Inquires Misaka, admittedly peeved at the drone's thought process." says the Misaka Sister.
Uzi winces, 'She sounds more robotic than any drone I know... are all humans like this?' now that one thinks about it, Uzi never met humans in person before now did she? She was born after the Great Yeetening.
"...Misaka is a clone, states Misaka." explains the Misaka Sister.
"Oh..." Uzi is unsure of what to make of that, "So... why do you talk like an automated message system?" with what little Uzi knows about humans, they don't talk in third person, unless something's wrong with their mental state.
"It's how Misaka was programmed-"
Alf is suddenly standing menacingly besides Misaka Sister 15780, "Silence underage waifu. The show is about to begin."
"...Misaka would make a joke about your lack of partner, but Misaka knows better than to joke about personal loss."
"Good." Alf tosses over a notepad that smacks Uzi in the face.
"HEY?! What was that for?!"
"I meant to hit the human beside you, but I missed." states Alf.
"Misaka appreciates the honesty."
"Shut up waifu. Just keep that notepad beside you."
SD-J still looks, unconvinced about this being a view of the future, much less actually wanting to abide by the rules, but seeing how SD-OC can easily overpower her, and their weapons are not exactly functioning, other than their tails, she reluctantly remains seated. Even she knows when a fight is a losing one, she won't just charge in recklessly like some moron, that's what SD-N does. Oh how she wants to tear apart SD-OC, but that guy has access to his wings and weapons. She'd get overpowered, again, if not from him, these pesky cloth creatures that look like miniature versions of her pathetic teammate and the worker drone munchkin.
"Alright, here we go." Alf presses the start button on the remote.
[The teaser starts by opening to the night passing by as the moon and, other ringed planet. Ruins of the once human populated city, now a harsh tundra world.]
The only one in the audience with an ounce of interest, is N, and Riley. Mostly N, because he just seems to be amazed at anything.
Uzi is wondering why she's seeing what she already put into her project she just started on for the week assigned by her teacher.
Teacher feels like Uzi is going to frak up another assignment.
[The scene cuts to frozen human skulls on the snow covered surface.]
Uzi smirks, guess she likes seeing dead humans. As you know, human greed and pride once again leads to their demise. Maybe JCJenson officials ordered the lower employees to do so, so some employees likely carried it out but whatever, they never cared much about the worker drones regardless. So to Uzi, it's karma.
"And where's the action?" SD-V seems like she's gonna murder people if she doesn't get what was promised.
SD-OC sighs, "Believe me, there will be action. Be patient."
But patience is not SD-V's strong point.
[Now the scene is of an intersection, the signals are stuck on red, and two arms are protruding from the snow, a worker drone arm and a human arm, both reaching upwards, as if to grasp one another in their final moments.]
SD-J doesn't seem all that impressed so far, 'Future? I knew it'd be a lie. All I see is what was covered in the briefing before deployment.'
SD-V only raises an eyebrow, "Wow, an arm. So amazing." she glances over at the worker drones with a not so friendly expression, but SD-OC steps between the two factions, making the sadistic disassembly drone scowl.
"Patience. If N can wait so can you." states SD-OC.
"That pathetic bot would wait in the sun until he melts if ordered." SD-J you are not helping.
The worker drones are still wary of the DDs, at least Uzi seems to be paying half attention to the screen, not like the murder drones are in the best of state to, you know, murder.
Thad just doesn't seem to have anything to say. Rebecca, and a handful of other students, are somewhat terrified by the images. Lizzy is semi-affected, but when your partner is a literal psychic freak with a want of oil you really can't be so affected by things like this.
Then again, who isn't? It's the outside world that not many worker drones here haven't even seen. Few wander out in the first place.
[Suddenly it swaps to a view of some black visor of a drone, reading 'FATAL ERROR' as numerous statements appear and vanish all over the screen. It suddenly zooms out to reveal it was the dead of a worker drone.]
Worker drones shout and cry out in terror.
Uzi just rolls her eyes, 'Seriously? It's just a head.'
SD-V is still bored, 'I collect heads, seriously, when's the action? Ugh, if only that rogue disassembly drone wasn't here, then I could make nice little balloon animals with those worker drones. Starting with that purple freak.'
Uzi feels a chill, someone must be thinking ill about her.
SD-J narrows her gaze over at SD-OC specifically, as if waiting for an opportunity to nab him.
[A shadow passes over, and then reveals SD-V flying through and is seen in the darkness as she hovers briefly in front of the ringed planet's glow. Landing onto the snow, kicking up a gust of the white dust. She glances up with an X across her visor. A sadistic smile plastered on her face.]
Uzi noticed the beat has dropped, 'Damn, I need to ask them for a copy of this soundtrack. It'll make me sound like a badass.'
Riley, the vibe worker drone seems to like this music too, and is eagerly waiting for the beat drop.
SD-N calls out, "Look V it's you!"
SD-V rolls her eyes, "Yeah, so? I'm not dismantling anything..." come on V, act a little more, cheery? Gosh not everyone's a murder wiz like you! Lighten up!
SD-J pays no attention to the screen, only feinting to do so, one of her "Eyes" on her headband is keeping watch on SD-OC, she really wants to kill the guy. At least she knows she can't take him on without... her weapons. A tail is useful, but she doesn't know much hand to hand without claws. You could say disassembly drones are not really intended to punch other disassembly drones to death. Much less go up against another disassembly drone that has their full arsenal at their disposal.
Khan just looks, nervous, mostly for the disassembly drones in the room. He don't got no doors to shield him now.
Teacher is bored and tired of living.
Thad is being a gentleman and offering comfort to the students around him.
But Doll? Doll is... well to be fair her focus isn't quite on the screen, more so the V sitting a dozen yards away.
[The beat kicks up again as the Disassembly Drone Skull appears on screen and then flashes out. Then the title of the series "MURDER DRONES" appears with a skull in the place of the O.]
"That's so vibe." says Riley clapping his hands in approval after the music had ended, "Could I have a copy of that soundtrack?"
Alf nods, "Yes, in fact we're going to play the entire version for you guys before we see the future. I'll hand you a copy of the entire song if you want."
"I want one!" Uzi stands up, noticing how she just grabbed everyone's attention she falls back into her seat and tries to vanish herself into her jacket.
Alf chuckles, "Sure thing."
"Same here." Thad raises his hand. Alf shoots him a thumbs up. It's a good beat to listen while you dismantle your enemies, or dismantle your homework. Whichever fits the bill.
SD-N raises his hand, but SD-J smacks it down. She gives him a glare to end all glares. SD-N submits, letting out a sigh. Guess he wanted the beat too. Alf noticed however and just added SD-N to the list of who to give the entire Murder Drones soundtrack to when this ends. Darn you SD-J, just let N get contraband it's not that bad! The music totally fits!
SD-V doesn't admit it, but even she liked the beat. It sounds like the theme was almost made for her.
Alf takes out the remote from his belt and plays the Disassembly Required OST. Just because why not? Might as well show them the full music.
...
After that, it can be said for sure.
"I want it." says SD-V, giving a subtle glare at Alf, "It's the least you can give me to keep me entertained."
Alf nods, "Sure." and tosses a USB at her, which she catches.
Alf then tossed other copies at SD-N, Uzi, Riley, and Thad. SD-J attempts to confiscate the usbs from her team, but V uses N as a shield. N in turn clutches the USB to his chest refusing to surrender it to J!
The screen shifted, and the words appear...
=[Murder Drones - Pilot Episode]=
[Starting in 3... 2... 1...]