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We thought a cure would come through in time, now, I fear it won't
There was no day where Vezalius didn't see blood. For him, it was a casual, normal day to see wounded people coming to him for a quick yet polished help. He has healed civilians, his other co-heroes in ASH , and of course his partners, Wilson and Vanta.
There was no mission of theirs that didn't end up with the two of them mildly wounded on their arms or side. Vezalius didn't mind though. Vanta and Wilson were never fond of showing their vulnerable sides to the civilians or the villains. They were kind, modest, and interactive but they don't want to be seen as mentally and emotionally vulnerable.
And Vezalius was glad to be the only one who could see that side of them, sitting quietly on the bed of Vezalius' clinic, totally on the mercy of his hands.
One time they were both quiet while Vezalius attended to their wounds, nothing too major, just small cuts and bruises to be iced. Then both of their hands held Vezalius' hands, who were pampering them carefully, tightly and firmly.
"We… have a special mission," Vanta spoke. He was slightly slurring his words as if he was waiting the whole day to reveal them. His lips were split, tanned skin glowing under the clinic's light despite it looking tired.
Vezalius kneeled in front of them, eyebrows slight frowning. "A special mission?"
"Yeah, the two of us and other heroes were sent," Wilson said, glancing sideways to Vanta who was still looking down on Vezalius.
"Like… the two of you?" Vezalius concluded, pursing his lips. "Alright. Usually I would come and aid you after your battles, since it is slightly dangerous for me to standby. Where are you guys located?"
Both heroes looked at him, before looking at each other. "It's confidential."
Vezalius halted, "Confidential? We literally work together, in the same company, in the same team."
"It's too dangerous because the higher-ups know you're going to locate the place to help us," Vanta reasoned.
"Wait, wait, what?" Vezalius spluttered, standing up slowly. "What?"
"Zali, the place is dangerous, and we were assigned there to eliminate all targets, after that we're going back to the HQ to get taken care of,"
Vezalius stared at them in bewilderment and confusion. He ignored the hurt filling his chest. "I don't get it, why can't I come with you guys or after your battle?"
"You're most likely to be targeted as soon as the enemies figured out you're the healer," Vanta thumbed his knuckles gently, reassuringly. "It will only last for three days."
"Three days?" Vezalius echoed. "You could lose a big amount of blood that could kill you during those days, Vanta."
"We're not going to be alone there," Wilson assured him. "We're powerful altogether, Zali. I hope you don't worry."
" We are powerful together, the three of us." Vezalius choked out softly. "I am strong, too, just in case you forgot."
"We can't disobey the orders, Z," Wilson whispered. "I'm so sorry."
Vezalius blinked slowly as his lips parted slightly in shock, his hands still being held gently by the two heroes sitting in front of him, eyes sad and guilty.
"Who are you guys fighting?" Vezalius whispered. Neither answered. It was still confidential. Confidential enough that even Vezalius himself cannot know.
Vezalius didn't say anymore words, he just mutely continued cleaning up the two of his partners. He raised his face mask to cover half of his face to hide the emotions he was going through. He let his hair become the curtain between his eyes and the heroes who were gazing at him.
Do I throw out everything we built or keep it?
Since ASH was a big place, they allowed their heroes to reside there, it was more convenient for everyone. On this floor, he lived alone with the rest of his teammates. His room was in the middle while Vanta was on the right and Wilson was on the left.
Outside his balcony, Vezalius sat on the ground while his eyes were trained on the sky. No stars in sight, no clouds, no nothing. Just an empty, dark sky. He felt lost. He felt even more out of path, seeing how blank the night sky was.
He silently called for his late sister in his mind. He missed her. She would have comforted him like she used to.
The night before the team left, knocks on Vezalius' door were heard.
Fatigue from overthinking and brooding, he trudged towards the door, peeking through the small gap, and saw a glimpse of Wilson and Vanta standing there awkwardly.
Vezalius gulped, opening the door a bit wider.
Suddenly, two tall and built bodies collided with him. arms wrapping around the healer tightly. Vezalius closed his eyes as Vanta's lips travelled towards his temple, nuzzling his hair.
"We'll be back in three days," Vanta whispered against his hair. "I promise. Three days."
Wilson's fingers hooked Vezalius' hair behind his ear, stroking the healer's flushed cheek. "We'll be back before you know it."
Both of them pulled away, and Vezalius only noticed that they were both wearing their skin tight suits, not their usual hero outfit. This looked more secure, thicker, and tougher. Vezalius only felt sicker. He wasn't confident enough that these two will not get harmed. They were strong, he trusted them, he had faith in them.
But he didn't have faith in the enemies' plan for them.
"You're frowning again," Wilson smoothened the crease on his forehead. "You're overthinking. We're strong, you know that."
"Don't you trust us?" Vanta jabbed him teasingly.
Vezalius didn't answer. Vanta grabbed his pale hand, pressing his palm against his cheek gently, kissing it softly.
"Rest tonight, Zali," He whispered. "Promise us. We promise you we'll be careful, you promise us you'll sleep."
Wilson did the same to his other hand, and Vezalius felt like sinking onto his knees, and begged them to take him. He pressed his lips together.
"Okay," was all he could muster up. It was weak, hopeless, and concerned.
"We'll come home," Wilson promised. "We will."
I'm getting tired even for a phoenix, always risin' from the ashes, mendin' all her gashes
"VANTA!" Vanta felt blood spurting out his mouth as he landed on the ground after receiving a nasty blow on his stomach caused by the enemy. He felt dizzy, he could taste his own blood and they did not taste good. The taste made him even more nauseous than he already does.
He could feel the pain on his stomach quickly spreading, agonizing and unbearable. He cried out. He had been dealing with a lot of damage for God knows how long now, and he was strong, but he could feel himself slipping away.
"VANTA!"
He heard a voice scream from a distance while a loud roar was heard along with it, he could hear the sounds of his co-heroes' abilities trying to defeat the enemies surrounding them.
He hallucinated it was Vezalius who was screaming for him, but his almost unconscious mind knew he wasn't here.
A cold, unsteady hand held his cheek firmly. "Vanta, Vanta," Wilson's voice echoed as he tried to wake him up. "Stay with me."
"W-Wi—" He coughed harshly. Wilson let out a whimper of concern. He felt his forehead touch against his.
"Don't speak, it's okay," Wilson repeated like a mantra, cradling the man's head in his hands carefully. "Fuck, you're losing a lot of blood."
Vanta whimpered under his breath, touching his stomach and feeling warm, sticky liquid touching his palm. "I-I'm—fine." He gasped.
"We'll find a safe space, and we'll get you there so you can rest. Okay? You have to live."
He easily carried Vanta and skipped through the ruined stones to bring him somewhere safer. "Don't sleep, Vanta."
"Wil-Wilson," Vanta croaked out, hand on his stomach. "It-It kinda hurts."
"Of course it hurts, you idiot," Wilson told him lightly but his voice was kind of shaky. He could feel Vanta tremble in his arms which made him tremble in return.
Anxiety filled in Wilson's body as he reached a safe spot just a few metres away from the battle scene, gently placing Vanta on a hard, rocky ground.
Vanta wheezed, red stained lips parting as he lifted his hand, all covered by his own blood. "I'm leaking."
"This is not the time to joke around," Wilson ripped a part of his undershirt, lifting Vanta's suit and almost gagging at the wound he had. It was hollow by the impact, unknown liquid substance was flowing out of it and Wilson guessed it came from the enemy. Red veins and forming black and blue bruises were surrounding the fatal wound.
He felt like fainting.
"Shit, shit," He mumbled to himself, hands unsteady as he tried to figure out how to stop the bleeding.
"Hey, hey, it's fine," Vanta whispered, his bloodied hands holding Wilson's tightly. "C-Calm down."
"Shit," Wilson choked out. "We should have brought Zali with us."
"Can't," Vanta reminded him sharply. "You know we can't."
Wilson's lip trembled as he kneeled properly beside Vanta, looking in the distance where other ASH heroes were fighting for their lives trying to eliminate their very last target.
"Ah," Vanta grunted. Wilson looked down, and saw him plucking something out of his wound. "You think we could sell this?"
A sparkly yet bloody purplish gem was pulled out of Vanta's stomach, the unknown liquid from earlier now formed into small, spiky gemstones on his wound that looked painful and uncomfortable.
It was starting.
In a few hours, this gemstone in Vanta's stomach might grow bigger, and might spread across his body. If they don't finish this fight sooner, Wilson might bring Vanta to ASH all covered with hard stones.
It will kill him. It will kill Vezalius to see that state of Vanta.
"I can still fight," Vanta breathed out weakly. "Wilson."
"No," Wilson said simply. "You will stay here."
"I can't be a dead weight to everyone," Vanta continued. "I can't just stay here."
"You can't fight, Vanta, you're all injured, and you already lost a lot of blood,"
"You will not let me stay here and fucking die," Vanta snapped with all of his might, but it sounded like a desperate whisper to Wilson's ears. "I will not lay here waiting for my death while you guys fight. I'm weak right now but my power can still be useful."
"I promised Vezalius we're coming home,"
"And we will,"
"I can't come home bringing your dead body," Wilson told him. "I can't."
"I'm not gonna die," Vanta tried to sit up, face twitching with agony. "We will see him again. Soon if we finish this up quickly."
You might just have dealt the final blow
Everything was in slow motion. It was as if they were in an action movie fighting enemies to look cool, to be famous. Part of Vanta and Wilson's will to be heroes were those reasons. They wanted to look cool, it was something they always made jokes of. They were pretty famous as heroes, as they always saved the day.
Everything was in slow motion. It was as if the time was doing it on purpose, to make everything slow and agonizing. It was as if it didn't want the heroes to finish up the battle, it was as if it didn't want the two of them to come home to their waiting healer.
Everything… was in slow motion. He saw a flash of image in his head, a heavily injured Vezalius coming to ASH with a scowl on his face. A passed out Wilson carried by Vezalius' bandage inside their headquarters. Them staying up one night and just decided to spend it away by talking and casually hanging out.
A sharp, crystalized claw smacked Vanta across the face as the hero landed one powerful hit on the enemy's chest. The crystalized enemy let out a loud roar that caused the surrounding to shake as it stumbled backwards. Wilson took this chance to land another powerful hit on the enemy's body as it fell, his eyes tearing up as soon as he spotted Vanta's slowly landing body across the scene.
He cried out to him but there was no sound. His throat hurt, but he didn't make any noise as he shouted as loud as he could. His vision blurred as he weakly ran towards the direction where Vanta could have possibly flown.
Vanta landed very far from the scene, his back hitting against the wall roughly making it crack against his body. His face stung. Even without touching, he could feel it bleeding. He let out a chuckle. This was gonna be a huge scar.
The battle ended after 2 and a half days.
Stop, you're losing me, I can't find a pulse, my heart won't start anymore…
Vezalius slowly sank to his knees as soon as the bodies of the heroes recovered from the battle scene arrived.
He felt someone hold him but he couldn't move. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't think .
The pain from the past was slowly coming back to him like a memory he had long forgotten. The wind that passed by whistled, as if taunting him, it made him shiver.
He was cold. He felt like dying. He breathed loudly as he weakly tried to crawl towards the gurneys where the injured heroes lie, a broken sob releasing out of his mouth as he took the sight of his teammates.
He let out a very, loud scream of agony as his eyes spotted the crystals on Vanta's stomach, his face was bloody, ripped by some kind of sharp claw.
"Vezalius!" A voice shouted as they tried to hold him.
Wilson was no better, his arms and legs were crystalized too, his face was pale, he was unmoving, he looked dead.
He continued to scream as he easily got out of the grip of whoever was holding him back, running towards his injured partners with tears in his eyes.
No, no, no. No. He will NOT go through this pain again. He will not let anyone die again. He will not let anyone down again. He will not be put in the same fucking situation again.
"No, no, no, no," Vezalius cried, caressing Wilson and Vanta's face as he cried continuously. "No." He repeated.
He touched the crystals and it was no mistake that these were the same crystals that killed his sister. He let out a howl of grief as his chest racketed with harsh sobs.
Was this why they didn't want him to tag along? Was this why they didn't want him to know who they were fighting? He was so mad. Mad at everything. He had the cure for this. He had the solution for this. Why was he abandoned back here while his teammates, his co heroes fought for their lives until the end? Until they were on the brink of their own deaths? He was the person who made the cure for this. He will not let his teammates get killed for the same reason why his sister died.
By his idiocy and his carelessness. By his tardiness. He wildly looked around, eyes wide and fierce, his gaze piercing it hurt. He looked mad, he looked like he absolutely lost it.
"Bring them to my clinic, now!" With angry tears running down his face, he ordered the assistants, pointing towards the heroes, excluding his partners, who were injured as well. "I will not let anyone, anyone, interrupt me. I have to treat them urgently. They will die. No one knew how to treat this curse. Only I can."
I know my pain is such an imposition
The crystals on Vanta and Wilson's body were now long gone. They were wrapped neatly by clean bandages while they were still unconscious on the beds of Vezalius' clinic. They have not made any signs of waking up, but Vezalius got their hearts beating again, and they were breathing normally.
The healer sat across the room, his pale, nimble fingers fiddling with the feather hanging from his clothes.
He felt bad for telling them what happened to him and what occurred in his past. He shouldn't have told them about the crystal curse before, if he didn't then he would have been there with them. They wouldn't be in this situation. They were thinking about his reaction if he ever realized that they were fighting a monster that once infiltrated his life before.
Vezalius hated how selfless they've become. He hated how they thought about him before themselves. He shouldn't impose like this to them when they were supposed to be a team. Their pain was his pain, not only his pain was their pain. It didn't feel equal, it didn't feel fair.
He sadly walked towards his partners, his fingers slowly thumbing Wilson's cheek. His other hand touched Vanta's freshly wounded face, looking at his scarred jaw, cheek, and forehead. The healer let out a pained sigh.
He took this as a sign of his failure as a healer. He should have been there. He sat on Wilson's bed, his mind slightly calming down at the beeps of their life lines.
He should have been there.
"You don't know what you got until it's gone"
It has been two days since Vanta and Wilson woke up. They woke up at the same time as if they just napped together only their bodies felt sore and they couldn't even move a single muscle.
The place was at least familiar, it smelled like Vezalius. The clinic was slightly dimmed, a few new ASH healers tinkering around the place. One approached them if they were feeling any pain.
"Just my limbs," answered Wilson. Vanta said the same, but added his stomach and his face.
"How bad was it?" He asked Wilson who struggled to look at him because he couldn't tilt his head to the side.
"Oh no," Wilson winced as soon as he took a glance at Vanta's tanned, scarred face. "Not bad but… bad enough."
"You think this is gonna affect my popularity?"
"Yeah, it will make my image better than you,"
"So you admit that I have the better popularity thay you,"
Their healer was missing, though. He was not around.
"Hey," Wilson called for one of the healers. "Where's Zali?"
The healer hesitated, "He was sent out to a private mission."
Both heroes frowned, "What?"
"He ran out of vile for the cure of crystality curse so he requested to be sent out to a specific location to look for the ingredient he needed,"
"Alone?"
"A few healers went with him," The healer assured them. "He will come back tonight. He has been gone for three days now."
"How long were we out?"
"Around two weeks," The healer told them solemnly. "It was a painful process for Vezalius."
Guilt spread all through Wilson and Vanta's chest as the healer exited the room.
"Two weeks," Vanta echoed, breathing heavily. "You think he thought we're not waking up anymore?"
"Idiot, Zali does not give up that easily. He won't let us go knowing we still have a huge chance of living," Wilson told him, closing his eyes. "I barely remember anything from the battle."
"Me, too," Vanta seconded him, memories hazy and blurry.
The clinic was quiet, the other beds were empty but Vanta was sure he had some pretty vague memories of seeing patients laying there with hero costumes. He guessed they all woke up earlier than they did, and got discharged early as well.
That left the two of them.
A familiar voice appeared from the doorway, catching the attention of the two heroes, making them turn their heads towards the direction.
The door opened quietly, revealing Vezalius, whose hair was messily tied into a half man-bun, his clothes slightly dirty and torn up. He looked dead tired, he looked paler than the heroes remembered him.
He looked up, face blank, eyes cold, and his lips were pale as they parted. He closed the door quietly, face still void of any emotions. The silence was uncomfortable.
The heroes snuck glances at each other before looking at their healer who immediately went to check their vitals and their conditions.
"You will stay here for a few more days," Vezalius said raspily, tiredly. "I cannot let you two go back to your own rooms. Here you will be assisted and taken care of by the healers."
The heroes didn't say anything as Vezalius wrote something on the board in his hands.
"I should tell the others to bring you two food," Vezalius added quietly as soon as he finished writing, walking towards the door when Wilson called him out.
My heart won't start anymore (Stop 'cause you're losing me)
"Zali,"
The healer paused, his back on them. "Yes?"
"Are you… okay?" Wilson asked, then winced at his own question. Was Vezalius okay? Was he alright? How could he ask that when he was the one lying helplessly on a hospital bed and was aware of the mental state of his partner.
"Am I okay?" Vezalius whispered. "I lost you two. Twice." He continued softly. "You don't know what I'm feeling right now. I'm so fucking tired."
Vanta pressed his lips together. "Lost us twice?"
"Your hearts stopped twice." Vezalius explained shortly. "When you arrived, and a day before I left to search for a cure. Your hearts… they stopped beating right where my hands were pressed." He lifted his hands. flexing them, staring directly at his palms. Something flashed in his eyes that made his cheeks flush and his lower lip tremble.
What were they gonna say? They were sorry? They didn't mean it? They promised to come home alive. They barely even made it home, they barely made it alive. What should they do to make Vezalius feel better?
"We're sorry," Vanta offered weakly. "Zali, we're sorry."
They saw a tear slip from their healer's eyes as soon as Vanta uttered the words, his eyes glistened with something other than relief mixed with grief.
"Just…" Vezalius whispered weakly, lips barely moving. "Rest. Please. I will bring you two something to eat."
Unable to do anything, the two heroes just laid on their beds helplessly as their healer trudged out of the room, shoulders hunched.
How long could we be a sad song? 'Til we were too far gone to bring back to life?
"I will not allow it," Vezalius firmly denied the request of their superior who assigned the three of them on a special mission just a month after the incident, a week after the heroes woke up. "I decline."
His partners' eyes widened as they looked at him as if he just said he was going to burn his own bandages. Their superior's graying eyebrows raised as he leaned back to his chair, narrowing his eyes at the young hero who was fiercely looking back at him.
"You… decline?" He repeated.
"I am," Vezalius confirmed with no hesitation. "I am declining. Not just for me but for my whole team."
"Zali," Vanta whispered angrily. "What are you doing?"
"I see," Their superior said slowly, eyes bouncing back and forth between the three heroes in front of him who looked pale and in shock.
"We'll think about it," Wilson quickly said, raising his hands as if to stop him from confirming that they won't do the mission. "Can you give us some time?"
"A day would be enough?"
"No, we're not thinking about it," Vezalius sharply cut him off.
He looked absolutely furious. He was nothing like the Vezalius his partners knew, he looked really angry, with his eyes sharp and intense.
"Vezalius!" Vanta snapped at him in a low tone that some people would find scary but Vezalius only glared back at him. "Stop it!"
"Looks like you three need time to think about my offer," The superior sighed, looking at the healer. "What makes you decline, young man? Usually you are eager to accept missions with your team. Are you perhaps angry about the last mission?"
"I am," Vezalius answered, tone final yet still professional. He only had an edge of anger in his voice. "I am indeed upset about the last mission, you didn't let me come with my team when I was supposed to be their healer. They came back broken, injured." Vezalius' voice cracked. "They are not even healed fully yet and you're sending them away to a mission? I'm not risking it. They almost lost their lives and I'm not risking losing them completely. I respectfully decline." He emphasized his last sentence strongly.
Their superior stared at him, before spinning his chair around, facing his transparent window as he lifted his hand in dismissal. "You three may go. I will talk to you again tomorrow."
Vezalius didn't waste any time standing up, and leaving his partners on their seats, speechless and in awe.
I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy
For the whole week they were awake, Vezalius just refused to be with them. He refused to talk to them, he refused to be in the same room with them. He only visited them in the clinic to check on their condition before disappearing for the rest of the day.
He never looked them in the eye nor did he breathe the same air as them. It was driving the two heroes insane as Vezalius just didn't want to acknowledge their existence. As if they really died on the spot and they were just mere ghosts that kept hovering around Vezalius trying to get his attention.
They furiously followed Vezalius to his room, their boots stomping against the thick, tiled floors as they invaded the healer's home.
"What the hell was that?" Wilson snapped angrily, slamming the door closed. Vezalius didn't answer, he just took off his bandages from his body, back on them.
"Vezalius," Vanta called him. "Would you care to explain that? How could you just selfishly decide something like that? We didn't even get to say anything about this!"
"I already told the superior the reason, is that not enough?" Vezalius answered blankly, removing his top shirt to replace with a much more comfortable wear.
"Why are you being like this?" Wilson asked him, frustrated. "Why are you being so difficult?"
Vezalius didn't answer, he just walked towards his kitchen to grab some water. The heroes fumed.
"Are you going to continue fucking ignoring us?" Vanta exclaimed, throwing his hands up in bewilderment. "You're being a bitch right now do you know that?"
They have never fought like this before. For the years they were together, they have never raised their voices at each other.
Vezalius sipped his water. "You have no right to call me a bitch when I spend my nights taking care of your asses instead of sleeping."
"We didn't ask for that," Wilson told him. "We didn't ask for your help."
Vezalius looked at him with wide eyes, "What?"
Vanta looked at Wilson and jabbed him with his elbow. "What? It's true," Wilson said. "You're being difficult, and we're gonna get more difficult to you. How can you decide something like that without us?"
"Because the last time you two decided for yourselves you almost died!" Vezalius answered, slowly getting furious. "You're like a bunch of little kids I'm trying to tail!"
"No one has asked you to do it!"
"But that's my job!" Vezalius shouted back. "How fucking dare you tell me you didn't ask for my help? How dare you say that to me when I tired myself out crying while I'm trying to keep your heart pumping at four in the morning?" He teared up. "I am your assigned healer, you assholes."
He slammed his glass against the table, slightly cracking it with his strength. "I can't even look at you two without your blood flashing back in my mind!" He continued. "I can't even look at you without thinking how I uselessly stayed holed up in this hell hole when you two are fighting for your lives when I was supposed to be there! I can't even express how fucking mad I am, not at you but at myself!"
"You know we have a reason why we didn't let you come," Vanta told him.
"I don't care!" Vezalius said. "I declined your mission and you're listening to me. I will not spend another day trying to revive my teammates."
And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier
"That was our mission," Vanta reasoned, almost begging. "To be heroes, to bleed, to save people. We won't always be having a chill mission, Zali, one of these days we're gonna have a brutal mission like that!" Fingers ran through golden hair. "I tried my best to keep myself alive, so I could come home to you. So we could come back as soon as possible so you wouldn't have to worry. I tried my best to be in good shape, Zali. Don't think I didn't try."
"Still didn't excuse the fact that you two straight up lied to my face about the enemies you were facing,"
"We didn't want to bring up something in your past that could easily harm you," Wilson told him but Vezalius cut him off.
"I didn't ask for that," Vezalius said with a soft croak. "I don't even care. I'm not some civilian you think you can save. I'm a hero, too, Vanta. I can manage myself. You didn't have to be so selfless. It's not fair, it's not fair!" He repeated, angry tears flowing down his cheeks. "I knew how to stop those villains! I knew how to make your work easier yet you listened to them and kept it from me. What if I lost you, too? I can't lose you. I can't."
Fighting in only your army, frontlines, don't you ignore me
"We want to be stronger for you," Wilson told him, eyes glistening. "We want to be more dependable. Because we think we always rely on you. Zali, we want to be the heroes you can rely on when you're in need of help. When you need us. When you can't trust yourself. I want us to be your foundation of this team, I know you're the healer but we want to be the one to take care of you, to protect you."
"I didn't ask for such thing,"
"But we want to do it," Vanta told him. "You've had enough pain in the past, we refuse to give you more."
"Then why did you come back to me like that?" Vezalius whispered brokenly. "You came back to me all broken, all scarred, all bloody. I sent you off with smiles on your faces and you came back to me lifeless. I cannot sleep at night dreaming about your bodies when you come back."
"You think I am selfish?" Vezalius continued. "It's true, I am. I am selfish that I'm keeping you two with me, away from missions, away from hero work."
"You can't do that," Wilson told him.
"Watch me," Vezalius' bandages suddenly appeared behind him like some kind of snake ready to pounce anytime. "I will do anything to keep you two alive, to keep you two from doing anything hero related. Not until you're fully healed, anyway. I already lost my sister." Vezalius told them breathlessly. "I cannot let you two die in my hands. Not when you have me as your healer."
And I wouldn't marry me either, a pathological people pleaser, who only wanted you to see her
"I have to be the best," Vezalius told them. "I have to be always able to take care of you two, to mend after you two. But I don't want it like this, when you were both close to death while I'm desperate trying to bring you back to life. I felt like I was going to die on the spot, too." His voice broke. "I was repeating it like a mantra, asking you two to not leave me behind. It feels like I was always chasing after you while you charge so carelessly into danger without even thinking of what will happen."
Thank you for thinking about me, about my condition, for wanting to protect me," Vezalius gulped. "I guess protecting each other is something we mutually want to do."
"You're not going to that mission," Vezalius told them. "Listen to me."
The two heroes were quiet, still standing by the doorway.
"Lose something, babe, risk something"
"I can't have you injured again," Vezalius looked at Vanta's face, where his scar was prominent. He still looked really good in Vezalius' eyes. "I can't risk losing you two. Even when I'm there with you, seeing you both get harmed when you just came back from recovery would kill me."
"I will not take no for an answer," Vezalius said, slight edge of professional healer in his tone. "You will stay at home. No other choices. You two hear me? Remember you can decline a mission twice a month. You have not declined any this month yet as you two just woke up." He said tiredly. He sniffed, sitting on his chair as the two stayed standing up, unmoving.
"I got nothing to believe, unless you're choosing me"
The stars in the sky were scattered like some sort of glitter. Vezalius was sitting on his balcony again, a thick blanket wrapped around him as cold wind blew past him. He shivered, holding his blanket tighter around him.
He closed his eyes. The other two went to their office to talk to their superior. He didn't come, he already gave his answer, all he needed them to do was request for a month break from work to fully recover before entering hero work once again.
He told them to take everything easy, he was here to guide them, to take care of them. He didn't need them to hurry. They've got every time in the world.
He didn't want to be that angry again. He didn't want them to see his angry side. He hadn't been that mad since Lia died. He was always known to control his emotions, to suppress them. His serenity and his timidity kept the team at bay, from trouble. But every time he saw the crystal shard scars on Wilson's arms and the scars on Vanta's face, anger came back to him. His anger to himself. He refused to look at them.
He knew he shouldn't be this mad to himself. It was not his fault. But something in his mind whispered it was.
A hand was gently placed above his head, a pair of lips kissing the side of his head. A warm body sat beside him, fitting himself inside the blanket Vezalius prepared for himself.
Another body sat beside him, but only placed his head on the healer's shoulder.
Vezalius felt himself relax.
"What should we do for a month-long vacation?" Wilson whispered as he gazed up at the sky.
"Travel?" Vanta suggested softly. "Nothing too far, just around the corner. A small trip, maybe?"
The healer offered his hands to them by lifting his palms up. The heroes on either side of him placed their bigger hands on his, holding onto him tightly as a reassurance. "How about we stay at home and sleep the rest of the week before you plan something?" Vezalius asked.
Wilson hummed in agreement while Vanta made a noise at the back of his throat, "Just sleeping?"
"Well that is a way to rest more, Bringer," Vezalius told him sleepily. "By the time we all recover our strength, we should head out for a small vacation. Away from everything. Just the three of us."
"Just the three of us," Wilson repeated.
"Just the three of us," Vanta repeated.