The New Order

by SolitudeMoon

Summary:

Sequel to Pearl Stranded. After escaping The Jackknife and establishing a new place to live, 11 and a handful of other mothers of The Jackknife turn their sights on Homeworld. In order to ensure their future and their freedom, and to free other Gems, they must topple The Diamond Authority. As they do, they will also unite with the Crystal Gems on Earth. The odds are against them, but the odds have always been against them, so they will fight.

Notes:

Yay! Continuation time! I kept holding off worried I didn't have enough of a buffer to consistently post chapters, but now I have like 14 figured it was time. As with the previous work in this series, pay attention to the tags as they also serve as a content warning. Hope you enjoy as we continue this story! As always, kudos and comments are greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading!

Chapter 1: New Life

11 smiled as she realized the sun would soon rise. She'd had a bit of a rough night, but the comfort of the sun still soothed her so much, even after all of these years. She stood and stretched, her arm and back ached. She might have overdone it a little with training. 

 

11 had a huge breakthrough though. A new transformation. Now that she had learned how to handle Rage a bit better she found all sorts of new powers. Despair and Fear still overwhelmed her, although she could snap herself out of those transformations fairly quickly. Fear got her a few times in the early days of establishing Haven, often nightmares she barely was able to wake and teleport out of the shared sleeping space or dorms in time. She still caused quite a bit of destruction to the in-construction village but the mothers used music to help her and they always rebuilt.

 

Now though, she had a massive transformation she could control completely. It was almost dragon-like, complete with wings and fangs and claws. Instead of scales though a myriad of jumbled bones made a shield around her. She was powerful, fast, and strong. She couldn't maintain the transformation for long since it took so much of her energy and focus, but it was a good ace in the hole.

 

It had not been easy to get this transformation.  11 found she often had to tackle extremely overwhelming and complicated feelings within herself in order to make headway with her more monstrous shadow powers. This training session, she finally accepted them as her powers, as part of herself. She struggled for a long time with the feeling she was this creature now who had stolen Shadow's powers by eating her alive, even if it wasn't intentional.

 

Doc and Sickle ended up having to get on her about calling her transformations her monster forms, or those powers her monster powers. They were her Shadow forms, and her Shadow powers, a manifestation of the fact she was actually part Crystal and part Gem. They weren't evil, nor did they make her less than.

 

11 wasn't exactly a fifty-fifty split the way Steven was half Gem and half Human, but she certainly wasn't completely Gem anymore. She needed to eat organic matter now. Just once every month unless she was using more Shadow powers, which was often. Still, at least food wasn’t typically required daily. 

 

She craved souls, life energy, but all the souls she inherited from Shadow kept her satisfied enough with the organic matter as a boost.  She had the knowledge that raw, still living organic matter, particular fauna, would be more satisfying, but she barely could stomach cooked meat at this point so she just stuck with that and freshly picked fruits or vegetables. 11 had to sleep more than the other mothers as well. A full nine hours every two weeks. Everyone else now just needed a few hours every four weeks, although many slept more out of habit or desire.

 

The sun finally broke on the horizon.  11 calmed her thoughts and watched it. The life energy she could see with her left eye all started spiking around her as the light increased. More fauna awoke from their slumber and became active. Flora began opening their stomata for more vigorous photosynthesis, taking in carbon dioxide and light and releasing oxygen. It all added an extra glow to the world, shimmering and undulating as things became breathed with a more active pulse of life. 

 

11 let herself be still, let herself take it all in. She had eaten recently so the Hunger didn't gnaw at her like it sometimes did when she saw this burst of life energy. It was just peaceful and reassuring. The beauty of the world around her unfurling. It had been difficult at first before she had gained more control, but now, now it was an enhancement to the wonders of the universe around her.

 

Once 11 had thoroughly enjoyed the view, she started heading back home, to Haven. Their secret village they'd set up and had been flourishing in. She was excited, this had been a longer training trip than she usually did, six whole weeks, and she had decided to go alone rather than with Jolt and Justice, they had gained as much control as they could from their Shadow powers a long time ago anyway. 11 was ready to be with her fellows again.

 

11 reached the shore quickly enough. On a whim, she detoured from her boat to a freshwater hot spring. She stripped and let herself soak in the water, eyes closed and breathing in a specific way so she was floating on her back to just relax and listen.  There were all sorts of insects making various sounds. Recently they'd seen an explosion of amphibians, reptiles, and birds, and she could hear them as well. They were surprised to find so much fauna already on land when they first reached this continent. They had thought life like that was mostly still in the sea, and that was seventy-nine years ago. They were very wrong. There was absolutely no sign of anything vaguely mammalian yet though if there ever was going to be.

 

After a while, 11 dragged herself away from the hot spring, the warmth was nice on her aching body, but her desire for company was stronger, and she still had at least a two day journey by sea. The Hunger caught her a little off guard as she stretched and let her form dry. She didn't expect such intense pangs after eating so recently and not having issues at sunrise, and it made the need instantly too strong to ignore.  She picked some fruit from a nearby tree, using her Shadow arms to easily break the hard husk and get the softer, sweet flesh before the Hunger consumed her. It took two more before she felt in control completely again. 

Hunger still gnawed a little at her as she washed the juices from her hands and face.

 

11 decided to fish later after she had set sail. She still had some smoked fish, but she preferred to keep that for emergencies. The tough texture was always a little more off-putting than just freshly cooked fish and as it was, she felt a little ill from the fruit. Not that it had been rotten, just that fruit had a slimier texture she abhorred. She'd never have kept it down if she wasn't in the grips of the Hunger.

 

Once dried and dressed, 11 returned to the shore and pulled her boat from its hiding spot in the underbrush. It looked like just a long chest when in storage mode, but opened up into a solar sailboat big enough for three pearls. 11 casted off and manually steered the boat through the choppier shore waters, but switched to autopilot once she was more out in open sea and found it as calm as the ocean got. She traveled from one small island to the next in this little archipelago. This island didn't have a sandy shore, instead bordered by sheer, rocky cliffs, and caves.  

 

There was a cove on the south side of the island she always found a myriad of fish in. She had to be a little cautious since there were sometimes quite large predators curious about her boat and if it was edible, and once one had capsized her.  Although she didn't really have to worry about being eaten by them, and she certainly couldn't drown, she liked to avoid the encounters all the same.  She didn't see any signs of the large, almost eel-like predators, nor the fin of the torpedo bodied shark-like ones, so she set the boat to maintain position and casted a line. 

 

She kept having the cheekier, smaller predators snag her catches from the line, but eventually she just managed to catch one of them when it grabbed the fish she hooked.  She quickly ate its soul to stop it from thrashing about on the boat since it was a little bigger than she liked, then she sailed to the shallows of the next isle over and processed the fish, keeping some of the gorgeous scales for Bis2 and the meat she wanted but letting the birds and other fish enjoy the rest of the carcass. The Hunger surprised her as it grew again. Usually after fruit and a soul she'd never have pangs this soon. She wondered if it was perhaps a side effect of her new transformation and made a mental note of it.  

 

11 made it to the open sea before cooking and eating the fish. Finally, The Hunger subsided. She was very grateful for this, since she now felt uncomfortably full and was very overwhelmed by the eating process.  This part of being a hybrid was easily one of her least favorites. She never enjoyed eating, ever . And now she had to. She had actually found a few things she enjoyed, mostly broths, bitter greens, strong teas, or very salted mushrooms, but outside of the tea, those were a little harder to take and keep with her on these longer training trips, and often not satisfying enough for more intense Hunger pangs. And training like this always caused stronger Hunger pangs.

 

11 was a little envious of Jolt and Justice. They also had some Hunger pangs, although 11 had figured out how to share some souls with them and help them a lot.  They however, also loved all sorts of food and cooking became one of their favorite hobbies.  Actually now that 11 thought about it, they were really the reason she had discovered some foods she liked. They specifically experimented to figure out what would fit 11's tastes and texture preferences, and then taught 11 how to make those things.

 

11 was pleased with her good luck as she encountered zero storms, a miracle really, and made it to the shores of Haven in record time.  She made landfall at night, right before dawn, on her second day. She packed her things in a bag and slung it across her shoulder before putting the boat back in storage mode and placing it back onto one of their bigger ships they used to escape The Jackknife. They kept two here, at the shore, hidden in a cave.  The rest they modified to be terrestrial, and Jolt was working on getting one flying now.

 

11 mentally noted these two ships needed some maintenance to keep them seaworthy in case a hasty escape was needed. Then she exited the cave and began her hike.  The sun had risen by the time she made it to another cave, this one nowhere near the shore, and retrieved the solar scooter she had come out on.  It was just a few hours of driving, and then she put the scooter in storage mode so it was compact enough she could sling it across her back as well.

 

11 admired the new bit of security. Jolt had fixed up Chrysoberyl's ship so it was their ship now and had recently figured out how to cloak it.  As a few test runs, they had taken the ship out and stole some tech from Homeworld to help improve their village. This was one of those things, more parts to create another cloak, one that went around the entrance of the village. 

 

With the mountains and thick forest, they had quite a bit of natural security, but there was this one part, a clearing, vital for getting in and out, but also a weakness.  They'd had a gate and all sorts of sensors previously (tripped annoyingly frequently by the animals). Now they had this, a field that made the entrance look like it was still mountain.  The cloak extended of the entirety of the village as well so if any ship flew over they would just see more mountain and jungle. 

 

11 went to a very specific "boulder" and opened it. A beam came from it and scanned her gem. It beeped twice and then the field was gone, revealing the well trodden path that led to the village.  11 walked in and the field automatically reestablished.

 

11 had to fight the strong urge to run down the path and get to Haven faster. She was so close now.  She passed the Burning Zone fist, noting a rather fresh scorched streak leading to the fireproof pad.  They had set this up for their trio of ruby gemlings. They were still young and couldn't always control their flames, not that 11 expected them to ever fully control them.  So they made this, a little fireproof section for them to run too so they wouldn't cause too much destruction.

 

11 smiled fondly thinking of the rubies. They were the first geodes to burst here in Haven.  Ultimately the mothers had decided to let most of the geodes develop and burst. They also decided to keep most in standard incubation rather than the fast incubators so they wouldn't get overwhelmed with too many at once.

 

Geodes that had mostly formed or could even potentially form gemlings if cracked at that moment, the pearls had overwhelmingly decided to raise, but that was only a very small portion. Most were in various earlier stages of development. Those had been a lot more complicated to get everyone to agree on.  

 

After a lot of deliberation, they decided the gemlings and these geodes were a group effort, but also each mother deserved to make the best choice for herself.  Mothers that wanted their geodes would become the gemlings' main mother once bursted. Ones that didn't want to be mothers at all didn't have to be, but were expected to intervene if they saw the gemlings about to do something life-threatening and that was all, if they had geodes that were fairly developed, they gave them to the group to raise. Ones that wanted to be mothers but did not want a geode of their own produced from being raped at The Jackknife or did not have any geodes would take turns being temporary main mothers for different gemlings until they found one they wished to be permanent for. Or, they just remained temp mains like 11 and Doc decided. And of course, those that had these geodes that were in the very earliest stage of development, where really it was still just magma in a geode, were given the choice to destroy them or give them to the group to raise. Only a couple decided to destroy theirs, letting the shell and magma inside spill into the ocean while they were still at sea.

 

11 had two geodes from being raped by Chrysoberyl in The Mirror Room. She wasn't entirely sure what to do with them yet. She had decided to let them continue to develop, but not if she would raise them. Doc and her had discussed it extensively but the ultimate decision was up to 11 and she simply didn't know what she wanted. Would they just be constant reminders of Chrysoberyl and The Mirror Room for both herself and Doc? Would it be fine? 

 

11 and Doc did want gemlings eventually, although Doc had long ago gotten rid of her stored essence since she never wanted to be a part of any geode's makeup. With her abdomen scar she couldn't make geodes either.  But were these the right gemlings for them? Could another pearl love them better? Something deep ached in 11 though thinking of giving them up. But another part ached thinking about keeping them. It was a dilemma. One she'd have to solve in the next century since they would be like to burst in that time. Different gem types took different amounts of time, but 130 to 180 years was the most common timeframe.

 

11's lost in thought frown turned into a smile as she saw Bis2 strumming on a guitar in a tree right before the village. Bis2 was still stuck in second phase without any indication of entering third phase soon.

"Aren't you supposed to be at school, little one?" 11 asked.

Bis2's face lit up as she turned to look at who had spoken to her, "11! You're back! You're back!"

 

Bis2 stored her guitar in her gem and then flung herself at 11.  11 laughed and caught the excited gemling in her arms, hugging her tight. 

After the greeting 11 pulled away a little, still holding Bis2, "I'm back. Now seriously, why aren't you in school?"

 

Bis2 shrugged, "It's review day. Stuff that us older kids have gone over several times already. Jolt came up with a test and if you get a perfect score she considers you to have mastered the material so you get free time instead."

"Oh? I suppose that makes sense. So you got a perfect score for today's lessons?"

Bis2 held her head up and puffed out her chest, "Yep! So I decided to come out here and write, collect stuff, and practice guitar."

 

"Oh, that reminds me," 11 set Bis2 down and swung her bag around, "I have something for you."

Bis2's voice squeaked, "You do!?"

11 smiled and nodded, "Mm-hm, I caught a new fish the other day and I thought you'd like the scales for your miniatures."

11 pulled out the bag of scales, a muted rainbow in color, and handed them over.

"Whoa! They're me colored! Thanks Mom-uh, 11!"

 

Bis2 blushed furiously at calling 11 Mom and then quickly said all in one breath,"Oh right I told Zip I would meet her by the river better go bye."

Bis2 blushed even more as she tripped and then she ran off, but stopped and said, "Thanks again for the scales!" and kept running.

 

11 smiled and then sighed a little. It was hard sometimes, with Bis2.  She had such a strong bond with the gemling. Doc did as well, especially since Doc tended to the gemlings back at The Jackknife.  Honestly 11 wanted to become Bis2's main mother, and Doc did as well. She suspected Bis2 wanted that also.  11 couldn't though, not with what came next. 

 

She couldn't, in good conscience, become one of Bis2's mains just to leave her, even temporarily. Especially since Doc was coming with 11, too. As hard as it was, it simply wasn't fair to Bis2. Because what came next was war with Homeworld. And she knew that was next because she and a few of the others were going to start the war.

Chapter 2: What Tomorrow Will Bring

Sickle immediately came over to 11 as she entered Haven.

"Thank fuck you're back," 5-7 greeted in Nacreous, "Doc is being stubborn."

11 frowned,"About?"

 

Sickle switched to Common with her thick accent, she had been starting to understand and speak Common more and practiced frequently now, "Who knows. Will not talk, will not sleep. She needs sleep. She just holed up in her herb lab and keeps setting up new seedlings. So many seedlings! And for what? She will not say. Her energy is low but she now refuses to even let me in to talk."

11's frown deepened and she looked towards Doc's hydroponics lab, "I'll speak with her, see if I can get anything. At the very least I could use some rest as well so I'll try to get her to go with me back to our room."

 

Sickle nodded, "Best of luck. You will need it. Oh, how was training?" She blushed, "Forgive, I did not even say hello."

11 chuckled, "No worries, dear friend, I'm glad you told me about Doc. Training went very well. I have a new transformation, one I can control. It's very taxing, but should come in handy."

Sickle nodded, "Good, very good. Well, I need to go. I am helping at school today. The littlest ones are starting to learn about healing plants."

11 smiled, "Have fun then."

 

11 immediately went to Doc's hydroponics lab. Originally she was going to go to the dorms to drop off the scooter in the lobby storage and her belongings in her apartment with Doctor, but she wanted to check on Doc first now. 11 could see even walking through the smaller greenhouse connected to Doc's hydroponics lab that Sickle was correct that Doctor was planting a seemingly unnecessary amount of seedlings. So much they didn't all fit in the lab.

 

11 actually found Doc setting a section up in the greenhouse.  She took a moment to assess how Doc was doing from her physical appearance. Doc's brows were both furrowed and crinkled and her lip well chewed. Meaning she at least wasn't disconnected from her feelings. 

 

Her orchid hair was pulled into a tight bun, but some of the strands had come loose and were not back in place yet. The jacket she usually wore over her dress was gone, and the shirt part of her dress was unzipped and hanging at her sides.  11 could see Doc was still sweating despite this, the hardlight sweat an indicator of her stress as it dripped down her scarred back and abdomen.  Doc had her brand of 3-10 out as well. Something she had been struggling to have visible recently.

 

As 11 got closer, Doctor startled and whirled around and then said tersely as she returned to her work, "If you've been sent here by Sickle to try to force me to rest then you can go back and tell her to mind her business and stop being stubborn."

11 raised an eyebrow and hung back a bit, "Hm, well, I'll keep that in mind. But I'm also here to greet you, my love. And because I was worried something was wrong. I am even more worried now that I see you, because there clearly is something stressing and worrying you."

 

Doc paused, then glanced back, "It is good to see you've returned, my love. I missed you." Then she finished setting out the last of the seedlings from the cart onto the greenhouse table and headed back for the lab. 11 debated and then followed.

 

"So what's the goal here?" 11 asked, "Perhaps I could help. I have some energy left after all, and I would very much like to cuddle up with you in our bed and sleep soundly, and I know you won't be able to rest until this goal is hit."

Doctor hesitated a little, but then continued, "I have to be prepared. It's time. I should have started this already. I suppose I didn't really want to think about it yet."

 

11 leaned against the door frame, "Time? For what?"

Doc fought tears but kept working. "It's been 79 years here.  Which means another 100 years has passed on Earth. Plus, we've seen signs Homeworld is inquiring about the disappearance of The Jackknife. Plus you and Jolt and Justice have all really gained control of your new Shadow powers. Plus you and Jolt have the spaceship up and running and Jolt has proven her cloaking device works with the test raids, and the educational trips you've taken the gemlings on. Plus, there is restlessness. The need for action. The desire to strike back."

 

Doctor ran out of water in her can and soil in her bucket and went to refill them. Tears betrayed her and fell down her face, "Which means it's time for some of us to leave. It's time for war. And I know it has to happen. I know Homeworld will hound us and we have to make allies first. I know all Gems deserve freedom and someone has to step up to the plate and get that going. I know you need to return to your old home on Earth. I just, I'm not ready. I don't know if I'll ever be ready. What if something happens to you, or 5-7? What if something happens to Haven, our fellows, the gemlings? I…I don't know."

 

11 finally approached Doc and gently encouraged her to place the soil pail and watering can down. She wrapped herself around Doc and rested her chin on Doc's shoulder. "There is no being ready for war, my love. I would be lying to you to say anything different. And you are correct, it is time. We are as ready as we ever can be and it is better to go to Homeworld rather than letting Homeworld come to us. And it will be dangerous. I'm sorry I can't alleviate this dread, but it is true and I won't lie to you."

 

Doc sighed and pressed a kiss into 11's forehead. "Thank you. I do want to be more prepared though. I'm trying to leave a huge amount of rations and healing herbs that work with our hardlight bodies with the mothers that are staying, and I want to take plenty with us."

11 nodded, "Makes sense. However," 11 felt Doc tense a little, "I think a break at this moment is still needed. I figured with Remembrance close and Celebration a few months after that the earliest we would leave is after Celebration. So you still have plenty of time with our technology's ability to speed plant growth up. Plus, you just scooped soil into the watering can and water in the soil bucket so I do think you've perhaps pushed yourself too hard.'

 

Doctor looked down and bursted out laughing as she saw 11 was correct. "Alright, you may have a point. I suppose making more mistakes like this wouldn't be conducive to my goal anyway."

11 smiled and pressed a kiss into Doc's neck, "It may cause some amusement, or frustration, but yes, probably not the most productive."

Doc made an exaggerated sigh and leaned back into 11, "Fiiiiine, I suppose you've made me see the error of my ways. Take me away, my love, rest is required."

 

11 rolled her eyes and chuckled, "Whatever would you do without me?"

Doc grinned, "Be sad I suppose. Although maybe less distracted."

11 mocked an indignant scoff, "Please, I'm your favorite distraction and you know it."

Doc faced 11 and cradled her, "Yes, yes. Yes, you definitely are."

 

They kissed and then Doc pulled up the shirt part of her dress enough to cover her brand. Then they left. They held hands as they walked to the dorms.  Doctor asked about training and 11 filled her in and asked if anything exciting happened in Haven. Doc did not actually know since she had been isolated in her lab, but she hadn't heard anything at least.  They passed several other pearls who all smiled and waved as they went about their days, taking care of gemlings not school age yet, going to various activities like weaving, horticulture, documenting the fauna and flora around them, dance, music, leisure, baseball, whatever they wanted. This was Haven. This was all theirs.

 

They paused a little as they got to the center of the village and admired the new Great Tree and how well it was growing.  It wasn't full sized yet, needing another century or so based on the former Great Tree, but it was big enough they started adding decorations, bridges, string lights, lounging spots, and places for the children to play. After a nice, quiet moment Doc yawned and sighed, commenting that sleep really was required soon.

 

So the two continued on, around the Great Tree and directly to the dorms.  The dorms used the same spatial technology The Temple of Earth and many other Gem structures in locations with limited space did, so it was much smaller on the outside than inside and easy to add new rooms or rearrange rooms.  Instead of individual entrances though, there was a single entrance they all used that led to the lobby. The outside structure itself was shaped like a giant, closed, scalloped clam.  The door made the clam appear to open and allow them into the protection of its shell.

 

The lobby and all the shared spaces and halls were always well lit with the full spectrum of light. They refused to be denied light anymore after The Jackknife, and Gems had mastered renewable energy a long, long time ago.  There was a large fountain in the center and around it the floor was irrigated much like The Knot of The Jackknife had been and it watered all of the plants the mothers had brought with them across the sea.  There were new plants from the surrounding area as well. Dispersed amongst all these plants were all sorts of comfortable places to sit or lounge.  They often all congregated here since they were so used to being with each other. 

 

North of the lobby was a great hall for them to dance, sing, or train. From the sounds echoing out of it as a pearl opened the door and came into the lobby, Usurper was currently leading a self-defense class.  To the east of the lobby was the great bath hall, a massive space with warm, healing water for them to soak and enjoy, and even sometimes to heal more minor damage from strenuous activities like exploration, building, or sparring.  There was a large area to shower and laundry area as well. Mainly to remove dirt and debris from outside that clung to them and their clothes.   To the west was the communal storage area for things like the solar scooters, and then the "elevators" to help quickly get to whatever floor the pearls needed.

 

11 headed west first and dropped off the solar scooter.  She figured they would go straight up to their room next with how tired Doc was, but Doc led her away, "How about a quick shower and soak first? Both of our clothes are filthy and I can feel a layer of grime all across my form. I don't think I'll be able to ignore the feeling enough to sleep."

11 smiled, "I could use a good shower and soak too."

 

They went back to the lobby and then to the east.  There was a good pile of communal laundry, blankets, tapestries, and pillows that individually didn't warrant an entire load but together made the washing worth it.  Doc and 11 stripped down completely and added their clothes and the communal pile into the machine and ran it with the soap they made from plant extracts and Gem tech.  While that washed, much faster than human machines, they took a shower. They took turns gently removing the film of organic debris off each other's forms and then slathered each other with an oil scented with extract from a local flower that reminded 11 of a mixture of chamomile and lavender.

 

They moved their laundry to the dryer and then went into the bath and soaked, leaning on each other near the edge.  They soaked until the laundry was long dry and Doc could barely keep her eyes open. 11 wasn't too far behind.  They went through the quick dry arch, dressed, and were mercifully relieved of folding duty by a group of pearls who had come from training and saw how tired the pair was.

 

So they got into the elevator sleepy, clean, and smelling amazing.  Their hallway was quiet, likely everyone was out enjoying the daylight.  Sickle's room was right before theirs. Jolt and Justice lived on the other side, and Pearl 4 across the way.

 

Doc opened their apartment door with her pearl. Without a word, the two walked through their kitchen/living room/dining room and directly to their bedroom. They both stripped again and crawled under the covers naked. Sometimes they wore thinner, softer night clothes, but they preferred more skin contact between them. They sleepily kissed and cuddled until they both fell asleep. It was a long, peaceful sleep.

 

11 awoke when Doctor jolted awake a whole day later.  11 was worried Doc had a nightmare, but it turned out Doc had remembered she was supposed to help teach the little ones about healing and had missed it. She found a message from 5-7 on her communicator (inspired by human cell phones). Sickle had covered for her and was covering lessons for that day as well so Doc would rest and relax.

 

With that crisis averted, they snuggled back into each other.  They began kissing again, this time though things quickly heated up and until they were having sex.  The frantic type of sex. The type of sex like they were both in heat, or like 11 had been gone for a handful of years instead of a handful of weeks. The type where they chased orgasm after orgasm as if it was some peak they were setting a record scaling.

 

Afterwards they flopped down next to each other and laughed and rested until they decided to go out and enjoy the rest of the daylight.  It was too late to take a solar scooter to the beach and get there before sunset, so they decided to stay near Haven.

 

They started in the arboretum, a space curated by some of the pearls, paths created and up-kept, a few sculptures here and there, some places to sit, the native plants left mostly natural with only enough interference to encourage more flowers and to keep the path. At this time of year it was positively buzzing, insects, reptiles, birds, all excitedly feeding from the myriad of flowers and engaging in intricate courting rituals.

 

They pressed on though, out more into the dense forest of mostly stiff, blue trees with soft rounded leaves that in some ways reminded 11 of bamboo, and some very tall trees with girthy trunks that had a smooth light tan bark that peeled off in thin sheets. Here there was one path cut, only wide enough for a single pearl. This was so they did the least amount of damage, but it certainly created some giggling conundrums when two pearls going opposite directions met. 

 

11 held Doc's hand still as she led them through.  Eventually the path naturally began to widen as the forest thinned, since the bamboo-like trees didn’t grow here. The soil became red and beige from clay and sand. There were hardly any trees after a while, and they all had a distinct stain near the base of their trunks from consistent flooding that would happen a little later in the year. The ground was already soggy though, which made Doc regret not making an exception and wearing her shoes. 

 

Several pearls and gemlings ran around barefoot, their forms not as sensitive as a humans and immune to bacterial or viral infections after all.  Doc was one of them. She had spent so much of her life barefoot at The Jackknife shoes were uncomfortable. Plus, she didn't like how shoes made her feel disconnected from the environment either.  That sensation was important to her, feeling the soil or grass beneath her sometimes instead of just the smooth artificial floor of a Gem structure.  A tactile reminder she wasn't in The Jackknife, especially not in The Mirror Room. Mud was not exactly her favorite though. The squish was a little too wet for her liking.

 

Finally they made it to their destination, a small rocky outcropping overlooking the raging river.  11 pulled a thick, scratchy blanket from her gem. She had discovered using her Shadow powers she couldn't regain access to her actual storage space, but she was able to set up a new storage space. How much she could keep was a lot more limited and foods would decay, but it was better than nothing.  

 

The blanket wasn't the most pleasant thing to sit on, but it didn't wick moisture so it stayed dried and kept their clothes from getting damp where they sat on it. Doc and 11 snuggled into each other and just watched the river for a long time.  It was something that soothed them both, being near moving water.  11 was sure one day whenever she got to show Doc her room in The Temple on Earth that Doc would love it. The fountains, the fake sky. Assuming the others kept her room, which since they kept Rose's 11 suspected they had.

 

Some gemlings showed up and played in the river nearby. There was a slight drop and sharp bend that slowed the river down considerably, and they loved to play in this section, splashing each other, looking at the rocks, plants, and aquatic animals. 11 and Doc couldn't help but smile as they watched the gemlings. Their laughter was a much welcomed sound in addition to the flow of the water.  As the sun began to set the gemlings headed back to the village, but Doc and 11 stayed.

 

They watched the sunset and admired the stars for a while.

"It's going to be difficult," 11 decided to broach the topic, "leaving all this. Even if it's just temporary.  These past seventy-nine years have been some of the most restful and serene years of my life.  I love what we've built here together."

Doc paused, "So it will be temporary?"

11 raised an eyebrow, "Of course. I mean, that's the plan, war can be unpredictable but I certainly have every intention to survive."

"And what of Earth?" Doc asked, "Don't you want to go back?"

 

11 nodded, understanding the worry now, "Haven is my home now, my love. I will always cherish Earth as well, and I will no doubt visit it frequently and spend a lot of time there once we reconnect, but this is where I belong now. I want to see Earth again, I want to be with my old family again, but I don’t know Earth anymore. Not really, it's been too long and it has no doubt changed, and I have changed. Haven is home, Haven is what I know, Haven is what I want."

 

Doc pressed a kiss into 11's temple, "It's nice to hear you say that. I…I have to admit, I have been worried that you will want to move there and I would be torn between going with you or staying here. Because I love it here more than anywhere I've ever been. But I love you more than any Gem I've ever loved and I don't know if I could bear such distance, even though all our tech could guarantee we could see each other every day still."

11 reassured her, "I belong here. I am stranded in with all of you. I have been for a long time now."

Doc nodded.

 

There was another pause, "So, after Celebration, we go off to war."

"Tentatively," 11 said, "there is a task we must complete first.  One last test run."

Doc raised an eyebrow.

"Jolt found 1-8's location. I'm relatively sure I can stabilize her and we can infiltrate the prison she's being kept in. She deserves to be free. She deserves to be here, safe in Haven and amongst us mothers again."

Doc nodded, "Not a bad test operation either. To start getting us used to raiding Homeworld held faculties with actual Gems, not just the unguarded warehouses Jolt has been pillaging."

11 nodded, "Exactly. After that, or after Celebration if that comes later, then yes, it will be time for war."

 

They were quiet again.

Doc sighed, "I'm still terrified. I know we need to do it.  Engaging Homeworld again is inevitable and I want to do it on our terms this time. They have so much power though."

11 nodded, "They do. But as we've learned through keeping up communications with our Bismuth ally whenever we can, there is a thirst for freedom. A growing unease with the unfairness of the system. We will not be alone."

Doc nodded, "You're right.  Are you still going to keep your identity secret?"

 

11 sighed, "I think, yes, mostly. Ultimately I don't want Homeworld to know just how successful the Crystal/Gem hybridization experiment was with me. Not that I think they can easily reproduce the results, since the friendship I formed with Shadow is the major factor in my hybridization, but I don't want them even trying. I don't want them even more tempted to reach into the Crystal's realm and steal more of them.  Since Yellow is the main Diamond in charge of The Crystal Project she will likely see that realm as too risky to tackle while a civil war is going on without a clear benefit. I want to keep it that way."

 

Doc nodded.

"I don't want too many secrets amongst us rebels though,” 11 continued, “some secrets are necessary, especially since we will have to deal with spies.  But, too many causes far more problems.  So I think after a certain point, rebels will be allowed to know who I am.  It could lead to my identity being leaked, but I just…after everything with Rose and after too many secrets leaving enough doubt for someone to betray us in The Jackknife I have to take that risk.”

 

Doc let out a breath through her nose, “I suppose overall I agree.  I would argue that keeping your identity secret mostly for this is different than Rose.  Remember as well, it is a liability if Homeworld figures out you’re a dishonored mother of pearl.  We know after reviewing what happened at The Jackknife that quartzes couldn’t seem to give you orders even when you were in control, but it was unclear with the onyxes.  It looked like Yellow may have at least caused you to pause before you lost control. Also, 3-9’s betrayal is a lot more complex than secrets being kept.  There was a lot of different and unique pressures in that fucking hell and some of it was just who 3-9 is.”

 

11 conceded, “I suppose that is true.  My own safety is also at risk if my identity is too well known.  And that also opens the rebellion up to more risk as well.”

Doc nodded, “I’ll keep working on trying to nullify this modified nacre we have in our gems now, especially as we gain more resources as we fight.  I have no guarantee I’ll find something though.  We will mainly have to rely on keeping rebels considered high rank in Homeworld’s system with us dishonored mothers and keep things like localized Sound Eliminators on us.”  

11 agreed.

 

They talked a little more like this, working through fears by discussing them and solidifying plans and details. Eventually Doc brought 11 closer and hugged her tightly.  11 shifted, changing positions completely so she was on her back with her head in Doc's lap, looking up at her lover and the night sky. 

Doc smiled at her and began softly running her fingers through 11's hair, "Enjoying the view?"

11 grinned, "Of course, I can't think of anything more beautiful in this universe."

 

They stayed out until dawn and watched the sunrise. When a light rainstorm rolled in they headed to Doc's hydroponics lab and greenhouse and finished all the seedlings she had started previously.  It took all morning and a little into the afternoon. The sun was shining again by then. 

 

It was nice to be together. 11 would miss this terribly during the war. She supposed it was something to look forward to again after.

Chapter 3: A Knock on the Door

There was a shaky knock at the apartment door. Doc and 11 both looked puzzled, it was the afternoon and sunny and usually the mothers would all be enjoying the sun unless they were asleep, gravid, or shelled. It was later than usual for someone sleeping. They were in their room though.  Neither thought anyone was gravid at this point as well.

 

Several mothers took and kept their stored essence from The Jackknife and had used it to choose to have a clutch with their partners. Some held onto it for later, just in case, like 11 had. Especially since Doc had figured out a serum to inject when in heat and during the first two weeks so it would limit the clutch size and be much easier on their gems and forms. As far as they knew, everyone else was on hold with clutches.

 

11 answered the door and found Sickle. She was shaking and clutching her hooded shawl tight over herself. 11 couldn't help but think of one of the first times this happened, although 5-7 didn't have her shawl yet and blushed furiously and almost left before 11 insisted she come in.  They were all still mostly used to sleeping in the same room, to hearing others when awoken from a nightmare and passing notepads to ease the fear and loneliness. It was a challenge for single pearls sometimes in this new setup.  Doc and 11 made sure Sickle knew she was always welcomed to join them though. 

 

Sickle staggered and had to lean heavily against the wall after she walked in.  11 hastily closed the door and supported 5-7 as Doc ran and grabbed her med kit and then pulled out a dining room chair.

11 asked as she helped 5-7 to the chair,"Moissanite nightmare?"

Sickle nodded.

 

5-7 loosened her grip on her shawl and let it fall from her face and loosely hang at her shoulders. She had her left eye shut tight and her scar over it was glowing with fury. She still overall wasn't comfortable with most others seeing her experiencing strong feelings, but with Doc and 11, she actually sought them out.

"Legs as well?" Doc asked in Nacreous, as much as Sickle liked to practice Common, she was guaranteed to struggle with it and even not understand again during intense panic, pain, or fury.

"Yes," Sickle hissed in Nacreous, “and chest.”

 

Doc had a few decades back developed patches to help ease the pain of misbehaving scars, strips of fabric with tech between the layers that encouraged the energy to disperse from the scar and back through the rest of their forms as it should. Doc handed two to 11 and 11 placed one over 5-7's eye.  The other one 11 gently pulled part of Sickle’s shawl away and then paused with the patch at 5-7’s collarbone, “Good?”

Sickle nodded.  Sometimes physical touch in certain parts of Sickle’s body brought intense panic attacks now, even when it was for medical care, so 11 and Doc always made sure to check in before proceeding.  11 slid the patch over the other scar she shared with 5-7, the one that was in place where her left breast used to be. 

 

Then Doc leaned 5-7 towards 11, started lifting her nightgown, checked in, got the okay, and placed the strips on the leg scars for that side, and then pulled 5-7 toward herself so 11 could place the strips on Sickle's leg scars on the other side.

 

Sickle sighed in relief as they pulled her nightgown back down. "Much better already," she whispered.

Doc leaned her forward and scanned her gem, "Your energy is low. Looks like you had started to overheat, but it's already cooled. Probably just a reaction to the sudden spike in pain from the scars.  How does your back feel? Any scars acting up there?"

5-7 paused, "I think it is okay?"

"Would you mind taking off your shawl so I can get a better look?" Doc gently asked.

 

Sickle nodded and took off her shawl and held 11's hands as Doc looked at her back by pulling her nightgown away a little. Sickle was still shaking. 11 crouched down and placed her gem to 5-7's forehead, a gesture of closeness and support.  5-7 teared up and whispered a thank you.

"Alright, shawl can go back on, your back looks good." Doc announced.

 

Doc helped Sickle get her shawl back in place so the cut-out for her gem was where it was supposed to be.  5-7 pressed her back into the chair then and let out a long breath. She clutched her shawl close with one hand and held onto 11 with the other.  Doc went to the kitchen and started heating a kettle and preparing three cups for tea. 5-7's open eye seemed distant, but she kept hold of 11.  Doc pulled up a chair for 11 to sit, and then another on the other side of 5-7.

 

Doc and 11 chatted quietly as 5-7 collected herself.  They knew she liked to have them close and to hear them even if she wasn't necessarily ready to talk yet. When the tea was ready 5-7 let 11's hand go so she could clutch the warm cup with both of her hands.  After a few sips and another cleansing breath, Sickle began talking.

"Do you think we'll have to fight her … White Moissanite," Sickle's voice trembled a little as she forced herself to say the name, "in this war we will eventually start?"

 

11 paused, she hadn't actually thought about this yet, "I suppose at some point we might. Certainly not at first. When the Crystal Gem rebellion started the Diamonds didn't take it very seriously, it wasn't for a good seven hundred years before they really started sending a lot of top fighters like that at us. Before that there were some pretty terrifying operations, but those were few and far between. Plus, they'll mainly want Moissanite searching for new colonies. Resources are going to become an even bigger issue once the war gains traction, especially since we are going to focus on taking their supplies the most upfront."

 

Doc frowned, "I hadn't thought about her coming for you two. That's…unsettling to say the least. I don't want her even in the same solar system as either of you."

Sickle spat, "I also do not want that fucking bitch in the same system as us."

11 nodded, "Agreed," she felt her left eye ache a little, "I never want to see her again. I never want her anywhere near my body or my gem ever again. And I certainly don't want her anywhere near Haven or any of us, or the gemlings…or the geodes."

Sickle held one of 11's hands again. "Stars, she would crush the geodes and torture the children, too."

11 squeezed Sickle's hand and closed her left eye to focus as Rage bubbled up and threatened to slightly transform her, "She's done it before after all."

 

There was a long pause. 

"I know," 5-7 started, "look, I understand we have to avoid shattering Homeworld Gems as much as possible. I really do. I can comprehend that the Diamonds shatter rebels quite readily but other Gems hesitate, especially when they know the rebels, but that hesitation tends to go away when rebels shatter Homeworld Gems. But," Sickle locked her eye with 11's, "if I see her …my dear friend, I do not think I can stop myself from trying to shatter her."

11 shifted and sighed, "If there was a Gem that deserved an exception to the no shattering rule it would certainly be her. Her and the Diamonds. The Diamonds are more useful to us alive though. But White Moissanite? I can't think of a single use to justify keeping her."

 

A shadow chain with a vaguely purple hue materialized around 11 as Rage pressured to make herself more known.

11 fought her down and the chain disappeared, "I have to admit I don't know if I can stop myself from shattering her either."

Doc quietly stood and poured more water for another cup of tea.

"Sorry, my love," 11 offered, "I'm sure this is an uncomfortable topic for you."

 

Doc huffed, "You don't need to be sorry. Honestly I don't quite understand my feelings on this. I would feel much better and secure about our safety if she was ground to dust. I agree there is no rehabilitation for a Gem like her and there's no use we need for her, and she’s going to continue to torture and kill Gems. I logically get it. I just," she shuddered, "I don't know, the thought still makes my skin crawl. It's like…well, like when I think back about what I did to Dumor, it was necessary, but I can't imagine doing it now."

Sickle frowned, "Do you regret it? Should I have stopped you?"

"Oh, there was no stopping me, my dear friend, and no, not regret exactly.  Maybe some? I don’t know, I guess I just can't picture being in that frame of mind now. I just, I suppose the circumstances are so different."

 

11 was puzzled,"You mean threatening to castrate Dumor when she was raping me?"

Doc raised an eyebrow.

Sickle gasped, "We never told her."

Doc's eyebrow raise became more severe,"Sure we did, it wasn't a secret."

11 felt even more confused and now slightly alarmed, "Uh, what are we talking about?"

Doc looked at 11, "Wait… did we tell you?"

"I do not think we had the chance," Sickle said.

 

11 was a little exasperated now, "Alright, will one of you please just tell me what we're talking about in relation to Dumor. Did she hurt you as well Doc? Was that why she left me alone? Did she just shift her focus to you?"

Doc shook her head and hand, "No, no, nothing like that. Uh, you see, after Dumor tried to shatter you I was, uh, a tad bit irate."

5-7 snorted, "I did not think Doc was capable of such fury honestly, that is more my specialty after all."

11 raised an eyebrow now, "Oookay. That makes sense, she did literally try to shatter me right in front of you in a very cruel and personal way. And a way she knew would bother you the most after shattering a former friend the same way."

 

Doc nodded, "Right, so, well-" her eyes darted to Sickle.

5-7 shrugged, "Threats need teeth. The threat was issued, the threat was ignored, so the teeth were deployed."

11 frowned and then gasped and then laughed, "Holy shit, did you two actually castrate her?!"

Doc and Sickle both nodded.

11 mused, "That explains so much. I always wondered why she actually did leave me alone. I thought maybe she just lost interest because she had done the worst her twisted brain could come up with and was bored after I survived."

 

Doc clasped the back of her own neck and looked at the ground, "Yes, I did what I needed to do, and ultimately it really was what was needed to keep you safe from her.  She couldn't tell what we did to her or she would have been sent away, and she couldn't terrorize you the same way, and she couldn't turn to her fellow quartzes because they would have turned on her.  But I suppose it's just…I'm a healer. A doctor. That's why I chose the name Doctor, or Doc for short. I am a fighter as well, so it's not like the concept of causing harm is unfathomable to me, but I just- it's different? When it's personal? Although I suppose I took great pleasure in defeating Chrysoberyl and I am relieved she was eaten."

 

11 smiled, "It's complicated, my love. Violence always is. And your compassion is something that will make that even more complicated. And something I love and respect greatly in you.  When threatened and subjected to as much violence as we’ve been through it is hard to not…hm well to see all violence as the same in a way.  But it isn’t, and it’s important to remember that.”  

 

11 shifted in her seat and her smile faded as she stared off, “Violence in defense and to counter in response to the type of oppressive and tortuous violence we were constantly under is not exactly the same as that oppressive and tortuous violence.  There are very different motives behind what you did to Dumor and what Dumor did to me.  And very different motives behind everything Chrysoberyl did to us, and what we did to escape The Jackknife and gain our freedom.  Those motives make a world of difference.   To not acknowledge that is to not only place an unfair burden on us, but it is also dangerous.  If I think things like choosing to use my new powers even though I knew I didn’t completely have control was the same as White Moissanite torturing me to get off sexually, and there is no difference, it opens way too many thoughts up of well, since I’m already just as bad, then what does it matter?  There is no limit, no line, no worse or better, no nuance, I’m already broken and just as bad as them, so why not embrace all violence? Become the one torturing other Gems and enjoying it?  Not that it’s any easier to actually know where all those lines are, but it’s the only way I can ever keep my darker impulses in check."

 

"Yes, it is a good balance for both of us, and your hesitancy specifically is good Doctor," 5-7 added, "I admit without you my thoughts would stray to much darker places.  You remind me to look towards the light sometimes when I want to spiral into my hatred and despair."

 

Doc took a sip of tea, "Thank you, my old friend. I am not so star-sighted to think that shattering won't happen though, and that sometimes, in very rare cases, I know it is necessary. I know I may even be a part of it.  And you’re right, my love, it is a very dangerous path to completely believe all and any violence are the exact same thing. But I just…I don't know. It certainly is complicated."

A long, quiet pause followed.

 

11 slowly opened her left eye, happy to see her vision was back to the new normal now that Rage was quelled. "You know it's kind of funny. Back on Earth, when I was still a Crystal Gem and Homeworld first showed signs of being interested in Earth again, I panicked.  I thought I can't do this again, fight Homeworld, especially without Rose. I was so scared.  Now,” 11 took a sip of her tea, “I’m not exactly excited to start a war again, but I’m not scared, not in the same way.  I want Homeworld to know my ire. I look forward to rising up and spitting in their smug fucking faces after everything they’ve done.”

 

11 shifted a little, “Yet there is a different fear this time.  Perhaps different isn’t exactly the word.  Near the end of the war, it started to become apparent that there was a division amongst us Crystal Gems.  There were ones like me, the soldiers, who started to become more willing to cross the line, that started to want to take the fight to Homeworld more, Bismuth was like me as well.  It caused strain because then there were ones like Rose, and Garnet, who only wanted to do the bare minimum of fighting required.  Rose for a whole mess of reasons and Garnet because ultimately, she is for love, she fought only because she was told she was not allowed to exist but not existing was unacceptable for her.  She was very good at fighting and never hesitated when it came time to do it, but ultimately, she just fought to make a world where she didn’t have to keep fighting.  More Crystal Gems were like them than like us.  It made me ashamed of that part of me.”

 

11 looked at nothing in particular on the table, “Now, I’ve accepted that part.  And although I don’t think it’s a bad thing, I do worry, because there were cases of those like me, but who ended up crossing that boundary too far.  It twisted them into Gems I hardly even recognized.  It’s not the easiest thing to see the beginning of or even grow until it’s too late. Especially because it was something we didn't openly discuss, even though we knew it was a tension that should be addressd. But,” 11 smiled, “the thing with us is we’re more aware of all of this.  We know who is who, that Sickle, myself, and Justice are all more willing to cross lines.  But you, Jolt, and Pearl 4 aren’t. Usurper is actually a bit of both by herself, and so on.”

Doc looked at her tea, “As you said, we balance you, wait at the line to pull you back if you start to go too far.”

 

5-7 smiled, “Yes, and you do so without judgment, and with an understanding.”

11 smirked, “Together we thrive, together we rise.  We all have our strengths and weaknesses.  As difficult a burden as it is, I am glad to know you have that hesitancy still.  The caution, the question.”

Doc sat next to them again, “And I am glad you two have the strength to push and cross that line when I hesitate at a time action is required.”

 

Sickle yawned suddenly, “Oh, hm, sleep summons me again.  I had only gotten about thirty minutes before my nightmare and I’m actually a little late with this sleep.”

Doc clasped Sickle’s shoulder, “Sorry, that’s because you had to cover for me isn’t it?”

Sickle frowned, “No sorries.  I did so with joy. Would…would it be alright if I slept here though?  I know you two do not need sleep right now and you do not have to worry about being quiet.  I just, I need to know we are near each other.  Nearer than even next door neighbors.”

Doc nuzzled her gem onto Sickle’s forehead, “Of course my dearest and oldest friend, you are always welcomed here.  Do you want to use our bed, or the couch?” 

“We did just change the sheets on the bed,” 11 said, “but the couch is oddly comforting when you lay facing the back of it.”

 

Sickle smiled, “You do bring up a good point about the couch, but I think the bed will be better.  I am not a light sleeper, but also not a heavy sleeper.  Thank you both.”

“Think nothing of it,” Doc and 11 said in unison.

5-7 hugged them both tightly before she gingerly walked to their room, her legs more stable with treatment but still sore.

 

Doc and 11 ended up cuddling on the couch with another pot of tea. They had planned to go out since this was the last bit before their mother rotation where their room would be rotated so it connected with the nursery where the gemlings spent most of their time. Bis2 would be sleeping on their couch as well.  Usually they would take a baby since the care was more intense and it was easier with two of them, but this time with preparation for war they decided a second phase gemling would be better and Bis2 was always excited the few times they had mained for her previously.

 

The quiet and the still was nice as well. Plus once Sickle woke up it would be fun to do things with her if she was up to it. Sometimes she needed space after flare-ups like this, other times she needed close companionship. Eventually Doctor worked on her documentation of a few new discoveries in her healing manual and 11 started practicing on her electric bass. 

 

11 had a connector that allowed her to use headphones to get the full sound so only the quieter sounds of those strings were audible to everyone else. Once she warmed up she focused specifically on a few songs she had made with Bis2, always songs from all of the imaginative stories that seemed endless in the gemlings' thoughts. Bis2 had an idea for a new one apparently as well they'd work on in the evenings while she was with them this rotation.

 

11 had to fight tears suddenly as she thought fondly of writing and playing songs with Steven when he was little.  He had always been a creative and hopeful child as well. Always laughing and talking about good and evil and adventure and magic. 11 had to stop playing and covered her face as she couldn't fight off the tears. Doc didn't notice at first, completely focused on her work.  11 thought about getting her attention, she knew Doc would be supportive, but she wasn't sure if she really wanted that. Perhaps she needed to grieve at this moment. To let it out.

 

Ultimately 11 decided to just let the feelings wash over her. As she did her tears turned into Despair's ooze. She leaned back so it would just hit her clothes. The stains from the ooze would eventually go away, but it usually took a few days, and she tried to keep it to things like her clothes she could wash or put away until the stain dissipated.

 

Doc eventually noticed, "Oh, sweetie, sweetie, what's wrong? Can you speak?"

11 sniffled, "Yes, yes my love, no scars are acting up. I was just," she had to pause as her tears intensified, "I was thinking of all the times Steven and I played music together."

Doc came over and sat with 11 on the floor and wrapped an arm around her.

"Careful, I'm oozing." 11 warned.

Doc gently kissed 11's temple, "I can see that dear, it's okay. Do you want to talk? Or just be?"

"Just be." 11 replied.

 

So they sat together until 11's tears changed back to normal and then subsided completely. 

"I love making music with Bis2, I really do, and it is very different from songs Steven made but…I can't help but remember. His little laugh, when he'd blush if he got self-conscious and how his face would light up and practically glow when I encouraged him to keep going. It makes me feel…guilty in a way too. I didn't, I wasn't a very good parent to him. Maybe not the worst, but when I think of how I used my grief as a weapon to lash out with and how sometimes he'd get caught up in it all…or how I didn’t see him for who he was instead of who Rose had been. Or even just how I avoided him for so long when he was a baby and never really did much for or with him until he was a toddler. I could have done better. He deserved better."

 

Doc sighed, "It's easy to pick apart the past from the future."

11 nodded, "I suppose that is part of it. It doesn't help that the rest of his childhood and potentially the rest of his entire life was ripped away from me either.  I never had the chance to improve. Or see him grow. I was really looking forward to that."

Doc nodded, "Yes, there was absolutely nothing fair about that. Do you…do you still get that worry sometimes that maybe ultimately they ended up being better off without you?"

 

11 felt tears brim her eyes again, "A little.  Not as much as I used to.  I know what grief is like, and I do think they have grieved me, as much as that pains me. I know that must have had a negative impact. I also know I was…downright unstable. And I was awful sometimes. I was ashamed of it then and I still am. I kept doing things though, even when there was a part of myself screaming at myself to stop. Just don't pick the fight with Amethyst, just make my own decisions and don't rely on Garnet so heavily, just handle my feelings with Rose on my own and don't spill them all over Steven like some curse he has to cure. But I kept doing it. And a part of me just can't help but wonder if in some ways their lives are better without that."

 

Doc frowned, "Wait, are you…are you unsure about going to Earth again? Now that it is becoming more of a possibility in the near future?"

Tears flooded from 11 again and turned to ooze once more, she tilted her head back and let out a surprised but defeated, "Oh."

Doc held her close again, "Ah."

 

11 chuckled, "Hadn't realized that, but apparently-" she broke off her sentence and sobbed.

Doc started rocking back and forth with 11.

11 sniffled, "Oh, why am I like this?"

Doc gently scolded, "Ah, no, no, as you've said yourself, despair doesn't have to be an accusation or remonstrance."

11 nodded, "Right, right. Sometimes it just is."

"The fear makes sense, too. Uncertainty, pain, cruelty, they leave these wounds. What might have been is gone and what happened since is unknown, so all you can do is pick apart what came before."

 

11 glanced down and realized Fear's Shadow chain was indeed very visible around her as well and sighed, "Sometimes these new powers of mine are a blessing and a curse. On one hand, it does make it obvious exactly what emotions are behind the moment and help me understand them, on the other hand, they could mind their own damn business sometimes."

Doc and 11 chuckled together.

 

11 paused, "I suppose this is good. To acknowledge this side of reunion. Even if it isn't necessarily the most logical or likely.  I've been only focusing on how wonderful it could be. I neglected these feelings, this but what if, whispers. And I guess reality will be somewhere in between. My absence will have caused both good and bad changes for them. And my reappearance is bound to bring both as well. I think though, I think it will bring more joy than pain. For me, and them."

Doc smiled, "Agreed. And I am excited to meet your lost family. A lot of us are actually."

 

The ooze and chain faded as 11 smirked, "Hmmm, is it really meeting all of them, or meeting my other lover? I do know there is a lot of chatter about Bismuth."

Doc smirked, "We do all love discussing romance. Honestly I don't know which bismuth has more speculation and hype surrounding her, your blacksmithing rebel Bismuth, or Sickle's rebel and love, Lefts."

11 chuckled, "Well when the time comes I hope you all behave, Biz is a shy one."

Doc sucked in air through her teeth, "Oh, I don't know about that, dear, I can behave myself, but I can make no guarantee about the others."

 

11 felt more at ease as they continued to talk. Eventually she even felt good, and excited. She did love mother duties, especially with Bis2 or another second phase gemlings. So 11 began cleaning the apartment, dusting, wiping counters down, cleaning the bathroom, a place she spent more time than she liked now that she had to eat but did enjoy cleaning.  Then she moved to sweeping, mopping, getting the couch set up for Bis2. 11 flourished the tasks with dance and humming as she always did when she cleaned while in a good mood. Doc smiled and went back to her work and made sure to move as needed to not be in the way.

 

Once 11 was done cleaning, she quietly went into the room and grabbed a change of clothes. She briefly checked on Sickle, it had been about seven hours, which was longer than usual, so she was a little worried.  5-7’s gem felt cool when 11 hoovered her hand above it though and Sickle looked quite peaceful.  11 smiled and went back to the living room.

 

“How is she?” Doc asked, “she’s sleeping more than she typically does.”

“Good,” 11 confirmed, “gem is cool.  I think she was just exhausted.”

Doc’s shoulders relaxed and she sighed, “Good, good. That would make sense, she was up longer than normal and had a lot of scars flare up.”

11 sat next to Doc as she watched Doc tense up again and stare off at nothing particular.

 

“Are you worrying about White Moissanite and us still?” 11 asked softly.

Doc looked at her and bit her lip, “Yes. It’s hard not to.  I hadn’t thought about her potentially coming for you. What if she captures one of you?  She can definitely order both of you around.  All of us mothers really, I mean, the only Gems that outrank a moissanite are the diamonds for stars sake.  And Blue and Yellow Moissanite may be tame compared to White, but they are hardly potential allies.  They are also very cruel and known to enjoy the cruelty, they just aren’t as cruel.  Plus White is still the one your gem is going to recognize as your owner now.  Which means even with your ability to resist some orders there is no way you can with ones she gives.”

 

11 nodded, “Yes.  I know.  I hadn’t thought of it yet either.  I try not to think about her.  Not really ready to face all of that,” 11 took in a sharp breath as distant memories of her time alone on White Moissanite’s ship started bubbling up, “but I suppose I need to.  Because you’re right.  We don’t have a contingency plan for her. And we may end up desperately needing one.”

Doc held her arms open.  11 moved in and they held each other tightly.  Doc was trembling.

 

“I need you safe,” Doc sniffled, “I need you both safe.”

“I know,” 11 whispered, “I know.  I wish I had an answer for you.  I do.”

Doc nodded and just squeezed.

More memories tried to push themselves up to the surface and 11 could feel Fear, Rage, and Despair all flaring up at once.  She pushed them all down and managed to get out, “I need a change of topic, love.”

 

Doc pressed their gems together, “Understood.  How about we set up the living room for a ‘jam session’ as Bis2 likes to call it, hm?  Sickle may want to play once she wakes up and Bis2 certainly will first thing tomorrow night once school and afterschool activities are done.”

11 smiled and nodded. “A wonderful idea.”

 

11 and Doctor worked together to store the furniture in the living room so the only thing out was the couch and the rug.  Then they brought out Doc’s large pedal harp, as well as her smaller lever harp.  After that was their guitar stand with Doc’s acoustic guitar, 11’s electric and acoustic guitar, and 11’s electric bass guitar.  Next 11 brought out her cello and they set up chairs, leaving one in a large open area for Sickle and her keyboard and synths, or Bis2 and her guitars and drum kit. 11 set up all of the electronic components while Doc went around and tuned all of the string instruments.

 

Sickle appeared just as they finished. 

Doc smiled at her, “Good rest?”

Sickle mumbled in Common and nodded as she very carefully stretched, “Better than in a long while.”

“Let’s check your scars.” Doctor said and pulled out a chair from the kitchen table.

Doc ended up removing all the patches from Sickle’s scars since they all scanned well.

 

After, Sickle asked if 11 minded doing their Moissanite bonding song.  It was a song they had made in The Jackknife, and added to in Haven.  It was a way for them both to vent their frustration and fear about White Moissanite.  11 was unsure, worried she would not be able to keep Rage in check.  Sickle offered to fuse.  11 agreed.  Doctor could handle Fear and Despair best when they were fused, but 5-7 handled Rage the best, so 11 felt comfortable enough she’d remain stable and in control.

 

Doctor played a version of the music 5-7 created for this bonding song on her guitar.  Usually they had Justice play it for them since she would use the same instrument as Sickle, but it was just the three of them at the moment and they wanted to keep it that way.  Sickle pushed herself with dancing.  11 hesitated, but she could feel the need was so strong for 5-7.  When they fused Sickle’s legs were more stable, and although they often ached after, 5-7 needed that time to express herself this way as she used to before White Moissanite.  And it felt so good to share Rage, especially with someone who understood it so thoroughly the way Sickle did.  They held each other as the song ended, making a silent promise to each other through the fusion that no matter what it took, they would protect each other from being at the mercy of White Moissanite again.

 

After the dance Sickle decided she needed a shower and a soak.  Doc and 11 joined her, never ones to turn down either activity. Doc enjoyed helping Sickle wash her long hair, and they all enjoyed the soothing warm, healing waters of the fountain on all of their scars.  The only time they were able to escape the constant ache from these Jackknife reminders.  The soak room was actually quite busy, another rigorous self defense class had recently ended so they were all soothing aches and chatty.  It was nice to be so connected with everyone.  

 

When the trio decided to head back to Doc and 11’s apartment, Sickle only loosely put her hair up after drying it since 11 had offered to braid it.  It had been a while since she’d last done so, and it had always been an important bond between them through their many trips to White Moissanite together.  Doc played on her pedal harp as 11 braided 5-7’s hair.  After 11 was done braiding, Sickle pulled 11’s arms around her, and they held each other close, with Sickle’s gem pressed into 11 and 11’s chin resting on Sickle’s shoulder.  Another common way they used to comfort each other after Moissanite.

 

Now they didn’t have to endure the pain.  The lingering impacts of all of that torture certainly, but not actively go through it anymore.  They had broken themselves out of that.  Now they got to enjoy just this, their closeness, their bond.  The comfort of their close friendship and understanding.  

 

And 11 let herself soak it all up.  Let herself immerse into the moment.  One of her most precious and closest friends in her arms.  Her safe, clean, always illuminated room. Her beautiful partner playing so expertly and passionately on her harp.  It was wonderful.  It was everything they all deserved after The Jackknife. And it was everything that was worth fighting again for.

Chapter 4: An Eventful Announcement

11 was practically vibrating with excitement.  It was almost time for school to let out.  The hall had already been shifted so Doc and 11’s apartment were connected to The Nest.  Sickle chose to sit this rotation out.  She liked helping at the school and sometimes she enjoyed a rotation for group mother duties here and there, and that was good enough for her for now.

 

The Nest was the nursery, kitchen, dining hall, inside playroom, and gemling’s dorms.  They all had their beds and belongings there and a massive play area.  The babies spent the least amount of time there, mostly just there for play time since they thrived under constant care.  The second phase gemlings however, spent a lot of time there. They were free to roam while the sun was still up after school, but once it started getting dark they’d head back here so their always light-hungry forms could soak up the artificial light through the night. 

 

The pearls found the gemlings all did better regularly eating organic food as well so they had a ritual for a group breakfast and dinner for second phase gemlings. Pearls on Mother Duty would help second phase gemlings make enough food for them all, and often they’d eat with the kids since that made the kids happy.  Third phase gemlings were given more freedom, they could stay out a little later, make their own meals whenever they wanted, and some had their own rooms in their Main Mothers’ apartments instead of a bed in the dorms if they wanted.  

 

Pearls on baby duty had more specialized food for the babies they all called formula even though it really did not resemble the makeup of the human concept of formula, it was just the term 11 started using for it and became popular.  It was very similar to the paste form of the ration bars and the first phase gemlings almost all loved it.  They did so much better when given some four times a day.

 

Since Doc and 11 were taking Bis2 this time and had offered individual time, Bis2 would sleep in their apartment and spend as much of her free time with them as she wanted.  With her, that meant she’d often immediately head over right after school, even if the sun was still up.  Since the rotation lasted a month, Doc and 11 would insist she sometimes still play outside with the other gemlings.  Not the first day though.  They all enjoyed spending the first day completely together.

 

Jolt and Justice were over as well as they waited.  They were talking about YT.  Jolt and Justice were her official main mothers and they spent a lot of time together. More than most of the gemlings since they were together through travel after The Jackknife, and the mothers building Haven. 

 

YT still had chosen to sleep in The Nest once it was built.  She was used to having all the other gemlings with her after her early life in The Jackknife.  YT had recently entered third phase however, and now she had started to spend fewer nights in The Nest, and more with Jolt and Justice.  Much to Jolt’s delight.  Jolt adored her daughter and was so proud of everything she did.  Justice had developed quite the soft spot for YT as well.  The two were a known mother-daughter prankster force across the village.

 

Jolt grinned and started pacing, “Oh, I know I shouldn’t get my hopes up too much, since I don’t know for sure, but oh, what if I’m right?”

Doctor smiled, “I think you are. It would make sense.”

11 added, “YT has been spending more and more time with you two.  You’ve even been having meals together, correct?”

 

Justice nodded and signed, “And she has slept on our couch four times this week alone.”

Jolt squealed a little, “And then this morning she made an announcement that she had an important decision she made she wanted to share with us and that she wanted you two there for it as well!”

 

Doc nodded, “It has to be that she wants to add a room to your apartment so that you’ll officially be a family unit and she will be moving in. What else could it be?”

11 playfully added, “I don’t know, her and Dottie both have been getting quite close since they both hit third phase.  It could be an announcement that they are dating.”

Jolt’s eyes went wide, “I hadn’t thought of that.  I suppose that is possible.” Then she smiled, “Oh, that would be wonderful, too! Dottie is such a sweet Gem and they get along so well.  YT is always so calm and confident around Dottie.”

Justice signed with a smirk, “Dottie is quite obviously smitten with YT.  She has been a wonderful addition for pranks also.”

 

Jolt sighed, “Love, you are mostly keeping them out of trouble, right?”

Justice just smirked and playfully signed with just one hand, “Maybe.”

Jolt rolled her eyes, “I guess that’s better than never.”

 

Jolt’s smile fell a little as she rubbed the 2-9 still branded on her collarbone and looked at the 3-5 on Justice’s collarbone, “It’s so weird sometimes.  It feels like we’ve barely been in Haven at all certain times, and other times it feels like we’ve been here forever.”

11 touched her own brand, “I know what you mean.”

Justice lifted her bangs above her eyes so they could all see her roll them before she signed, “No sad saps, we’re making it so Haven will be our forever, remember?”

Jolt chuckled and shook her head and then let excitement light up her face again, “Right!”

 

A knock on the door that led to The Nest grabbed their attention.

“Come in!” Doc yelled.

YT, Dottie, and Bis2 all came in.  Bis2 was holding a box about the size of most of her torso, Dottie had a rolled sack, and YT had a long box.

YT smiled, “Howdy!” 

Dottie waved sheepishly.

Bis2’s face was serious as she added, “Hello, could we get Sickle as well? She is rather vital to our announcement.”

 

11 nodded, “Sure, she’s been resting today, but she shouldn’t mind.”

Once 5-7 was over YT nudged Bis2, “Alright Lil’ Boss, take over.”

11 smiled. Bis2 had remained in charge amongst the gemlings, even the ones that had surpassed her in physical development when they hit third phase while she was still stalled at second.  A lot of the pearls had taken to calling 11 Boss sometimes, and the gemlings picked up on this and often called Bis2 Lil’ Boss and 11 Big Boss.

 

Bis2 nodded again and blushed a little, “Right, well, er, so we know sometime this year some of you will be leaving to start a revolution.”

The room instantly quieted and stilled, none of the pearls expected a topic of this magnitude to be brought up.

YT continued, “We figured you wouldn’t let us gemlings come along, not even us thirds.”

A chorus of "Correct", "Absolutely you're not allowed", "It is not appropriate," came from the pearls.

 

Bis2 licked her lips, “Right, so we’ve decided we will show our support in other ways. Dottie?”

Dottie flinched and then stumbled a little, “Oh, r-right, so, well, Big Boss, you know I’ve really been loving making weapons with you.”

She kneeled down and rolled out the sack she was holding, revealing multiple swords, daggers, knives, and a few maces 11 had not seen Dottie make, “And, well, you know that has only become a bigger passion of mine since I gained full heat immunity when I entered third phase. So I decided to do some weapon smithing on my own, to prove to myself I can. And to prove to you that I may not fight in the revolution, but I can still help.”

 

YT went next, placing the long trunk she had on the ground and opening it, revealing all sorts of gadgets from scanners to different variations of the Sound Eliminator and recall devices for thrown weapons like Sickle’s bolas or Jolt’s throwing knives. 

“Moms,” YT said to Jolt and Justice and knocked on her prosthetic leg, "you know the second Ma introduced me to electronics I instantly fell in love, and robotic prosthetics for us gemlings with missing limbs has been my go-to specialty. Hardly my only specialty though. Which is why I'm going to move in officially. I want to add a room and live with you two and then add my own workshop to yours Ma, so I can do my part for the revolution safe in Haven."

 

Jolt squealed and cried and ran over and hugged YT tightly, "Oh, my baby is officially going to live with me!"

YT blushed and rolled her eyes, but smiled and hugged Jolt back, "Ma, please, we're the same height now, I'm hardly a baby."

"You know what she means," Justice signed and then looked at the gadgets, "and welcome to the revolution, little one."

YT blushed even more, "Thanks Mom. I want to protect my home, and make you two proud. Well, prouder than I already do."

Jolt, “Oh you know I’m always proud of you.”

 

YT grinned, “Yeah, yeah, but hey, we can’t steal the show too much, Lil’ Boss?”

Bis2 nodded, “11, this,” she lifted the box more, “is for you.  We all worked together on it.”

YT nodded, “Lil’ Boss had tons of ideas for this and I made what I could reality tech wise.”

Dottie fidgeted, “And I worked the metal.”

Bis2 blushed a little, “I created the design of the symbol too, but we can change it, of course, if you don’t like it.”

 

11 raised an eyebrow, “What exactly is it, little one?”

Bis2 blushed more, “Oh right,” she placed the box on the ground, “so we know you’re going to have to keep your identity a secret, and we thought this might help.”

Bis2 lifted a helmet with a full face mask out of the box.  It was all black except for a symbol over the mask, a circle with a myriad of colors in between a white chevron pointing up, and a blue and yellow chevron pointing down. “The chevrons represent the Diamond Authority, the circle represents all of us, breaking that authority as we work together.”

 

11 smiled and kneeled down, “I love it.  Good design Bis2, and this will certainly be helpful.”

YT’s voice cracked from excitement as she said, “Try it on! There's all sorts of goodies I can walk you through.”

Dottie whispered, “And I can adjust it if it doesn’t fit.  4-1 modeled for me though, so it should work.”

 

11 nodded and slipped the helmet on.  It fit perfectly.  She was instantly impressed too, she expected the helmet to block a lot of her vision since it looked so opaque.  Once she put it on though, she realized YT had adapted Gem visor technology so she could see through the helmet, but others couldn’t see inside.

 

“How’s your vision?” YT asked.

“Completely unobstructed.” 11 reported, her voice projected from the helmet, “I can even use my Shadow vision.”

YT pumped her fist in the air, “Hell yeah, perfect. Okay, I’m gonna put your hands on the controls and walk you through the settings.

11 held up her hand and allowed the gemling to guide her, “Alright, push this button and then say something.

 

11 pushed the button and said, “Testing, testing, one, two, oh, a voice modulator, excellent. Perhaps a bit too much distortion?”

YT frowned, “Hmmm, yeah, agreed, your voice is very disguised but also a little hard to understand. I can modify that, we can work on it later. Alright, turn that off for now and then try the button right below it.” 

 

11 turned off the voice modulator and then pressed the button below it, “Oh, it feels exactly like the suppression cloth for the Shadow powers, the Shadow vision is even gone.”

“Perfect! I don’t know exactly how good it will be, but it should be as good as the cloth if not a little better. Bis2 figured some extra control with your Shadow powers would be handy.” YT explained.

 

11 nodded and turned this off too, “Very thoughtful. I am very impressed. What are these last two buttons?”

YT answered, “Communications and a scanner! So you can send or receive messages. You should also be able to scan for Gems near you, although that has been really finicky. You can voice activate them as well. Still tweaking that part a bit, but we have time!”

 

11 took the helmet off and smiled at the three gemlings, “Well done.  I want to make this absolutely clear though,” she made her voice stern and her face a firm frown, “You are under no circumstances ever allowed to leave Haven to join the fight. Ever . Obviously in the worst case scenario, if Haven is raided you must fight to evacuate, but outside of that, your role in the rebellion stays here. And it is vital.  These are all skills and tools that are irreplaceable and monumentally important for the success of our rebellion.”

 

All of the gemlings nodded.

“And what’s more, with some of us pearls leaving, we’ll need more help from you older gemlings to help with tasks around Haven we usually handle.”

Bis2 nodded, “Aqua is already training to manage fresh water for the village. And Sickle, Doctor, Hems wants to do even more in the Healing Herbs Labs, if you think she’s ready.”

5-7 nodded, “Absolutely.”

Doc nodded as well, “Yes, she has proven herself to be quite valuable in the lab, and we will need someone to keep things going.”

 

11 sighed, “Good.  Excellent even.  There’s one more thing…a thing I hope is just a precaution.  I don’t want you fighting, but if fighting comes to Haven, I want you to be able to protect yourselves.  With us fighting pearls being the majority leaving, you’ll need to be ready to defend yourselves in such a dire situation.  So any third phase gemling, and you Bis2, that wants, will attend additional self-defense classes with us adults on top of the basics you children are already taught.”

The gemlings nodded.

 

“Thanks Big Boss.” Dottie said.

YT smiled, “Bis2 had this whole impassioned speech pleading our case for something like that.”

Bis2 shrugged, “Glad I didn’t need it.”

11 rested her hand on Bis2's shoulder and smiled, "You can tell it to me later, just for fun."

 

11 made her face serious again and stood tall, "Well then, eventful announcement you three. I suppose the only thing left to say is: Together we thrive, together we rise."

All the gemlings gasped a little and stood tall and stiff as they repeated the phrase for the first time with the other pearls in the room, "Together we thrive, together we rise."

 

Excitement broke out soon after. YT left with Jolt and Justice to work on adding her room to their apartment. Dottie sheepishly followed when Justice invited her. Bis2 announced she needed to go and let the other gemlings know how the announcement went, then she excitedly added they could play music when she got back. Doc corrected that dinner would likely be first, then they'd play and Bis2 nodded and skipped off. Sickle returned to her room.

 

11 placed the helmet on a desk in her room with Doc and stared at it.

Doctor came in after a while, "Something wrong?"

11 sighed, "I just…with Steven I never really knew if I was doing the right thing when it came to…complications with Homeworld. At first I forbade him from it all, too dangerous, he wasn't ready. But that just made him feel like we didn't have any faith in him and that he was weak. But then once he did start getting involved sometimes it seemed like it really was too much. I never really knew if I was doing the right thing. It didn't really feel like there was a right decision. I worry I'm going to make the same mistake with these gemlings. I don't want them to feel useless but, stars do I want them as far away from the war as I can manage."

 

Doc paused and chuckled, "You certainly did well hiding your doubt while you were talking to them. I admit…I was wondering something similar. They are so proud of their skills and work and eager to help. And we do need the help.  But this is going to be war, and we are no strangers to the depth of cruelty Homeworld is willing to deploy.  I suppose they aren't either. They've already been exposed to such cruelty. There was so little I could protect them from in The Jackknife," Doc winced a little as her throat scar glowed a bit. Her voice was quieter as she continued, "but here, here I can do so much more to protect them. But I don't want to just set them up in a different type of prison."

 

11 nodded, "I don't want to just control them either. I wouldn't be any good at it anyway, Steven certainly taught me that. I guess all we can do is try our best. For now, they're happy with the tasks we've given them. Hopefully it stays that way. If it doesn't, I suppose we'll have to tackle that problem when or if it arises."

Doc looked at the helmet and nodded, "It's all we can do. Shall we head to The Nest and start helping with dinner? It's early, but I know since this is their first weekend meal for the rotation, the others wanted to start something a little fancier."

 

11 smiled, "The kids helping with the rebellion will probably want to celebrate too. Oh! I know, you go ahead, tell the others I'm going to get at least one of the kids’ favorite crustaceans from the coast. So we can have a proper celebratory meal."

Doc smiled, "Do you have enough time? I know they're easy to collect but that is quite the distance, even with your teleporting abilities."

"I may be a little late, but it's not like it takes long to cook. I better leave now though." 11 went to the apartment entrance and put on her socks and boots.

 

"Eat this on the way," Doc said and handed 11 a bag with a strip of dried fish, "to combat the somewhat unnecessary energy expenditure."

11 grimaced a little, "What if I just eat dinner with the little ones? Instead of just having tea?"

Doctor smirked a little, "Alright, but you'll have to eat a pretty good portion."

11 nodded and sighed, "If only we could establish a warp pad at the coast or if the solar scooters were faster."

Doc kissed 11 on the lips, "Maybe one day. We do have some fish in storage, so you really don't have to go."

 

11 returned the kiss, "I've already put my boots on. Besides, I want them to have their favorites. I want to celebrate." 

Doc sighed, "You do love to spoil them."

11 smiled, "They deserve it."

Doc nodded, "They do. You better get going then."

 

11 giggled and took off down the hall. She went down the elevator and from communal storage grabbed a large and small net, as well as a solar scooter to get out of the village faster. Once she was a safe distance from the village, she got off the scooter and put it in storage mode. Then 11 took in a deep breath, and focused.  Teleporting longer distances using Shadow powers was a little tricky. She certainly couldn't make it all the way to the beach in one go. Typically, for safety and because it was much easier to control, she liked to only teleport to places she could still see.  That way would take far too much energy to get to the coast. 

 

11 focused on a very specific clearing she knew was on the way and near the limit of the distance she could go. Then she let more of her Shadow energy course through her entire form and held out her hand in the direction of travel as a guide. Once she gathered enough energy, she closed her eyes and thought only of the clearing.  With a distorted screech and an intense sound of rushing air, she made it. She giggled, getting a little jolt from the thrill of the movement and success. She thought of her next checkpoint and was easily able to get to it.

 

11 had to take a small break after her third teleport, then arrived close enough to the beach on her sixth.  Not bad, but she wished she had made it in four. This many teleports meant she would have to eat a rather large meal to balance out the energy expenditure. She probably would need a second meal in the middle of the night as well. It was worth it for the kids.

 

11 placed the scooter on a large flat rock and then headed to the rockier part of the coast. As expected, several of the creatures she was after were out. They looked very much like large versions of a combination of Earth crab and lobster. They mainly fed at the bottom of the ocean, but during certain parts of the day they'd come on land to pick off completely aquatic creatures that were shored during changes in the tide. They were easy to pick up by their backs, the shell providing plenty of surface and texture to grab and their limited mobility preventing their claws from reaching the dead center of their back.

 

Since the pearls had a policy to try to minimize impact on the ecosystem, 11 only picked large ones showing signs they were older, and didn't take any that had visible eggs nestled and protected on the underside of their shell. They wanted these creatures to continue to thrive after all. Since only older and larger ones tended to venture to the dangers of the beach, this was always the best spot to collect.

 

Since they were prone to fighting in the net, 11 dispatched them before placing them in, choosing this time to quickly eat their souls to help prepare some energy for teleporting back home.  Once she collected enough for the meal, she stored the large net in her gem to at least slow the decay of the delicate creatures.  Then she stripped down and placed her clothes in the scooter case and boots next to the case. She grabbed the small net and a small, curved knife attached to it.

 

11 dove into the ocean and clung to the cliffs.  She was looking for very specific mollusk-like filter feeders that liked to anchor there. Most of the gemlings weren't too keen on these, but 11 favored them and figured she'd collect a handful for her later meal to try and make the experience less arduous. She was quite happy to find a massive collection of them and very carefully pried just enough for her own meal of the larger ones using the knife.

 

11 briefly surfaced to store these in her gem. She had learned the hard way once that storing things underwater in this new space she made in her gem would also store some of the water. Expelling it from the space had been unpleasant. Doc had to end up going in to mop some of it up for her so everything stored would stop being water logged. 

 

Once that was done 11 dove back in and headed to the bottom. This area wasn't exactly shallow, but it wasn't very deep either. The flow of water was less extreme as well and there was a well-established reef, so creatures often gathered here.  There were all sorts of life darting about, but 11 was after a very specific one.  Another crustacean like creature, typically very big.  They weren't rare, but they were not as common so they were very picky about harvesting them.  They also happened to be everyone's favorite, so they would be good for their little impromptu celebration.

 

11 ended up not having any luck.  She found a few, but they were too young. If she had a little more time she likely would have found an older one, but she settled for what she already collected and made a mental note to make sure she dedicated enough time to collect one for actual Celebration in a few months. 11 surfaced and was impatient as she waited to dry. She had forgotten to grab a towel and didn't particularly want to deal with soggy clothes.

 

She was going to be a little late. Not too bad though, hopefully only delaying dinner by fifteen minutes or so.  Enough that some of the fussier gemlings would complain, but hopefully there would be something for them to snack on to keep them happy. The sun was starting to set as she dressed.

 

It took seven teleports to get close enough to Haven. 11 huffed when she missed her mark on one teleport. Wasted energy. At least she had enough food to make up for the blunder later.  She got on the scooter again once she was close enough and headed directly for the dorms. It had been dark for a few minutes once she made it. After storing the scooter, she made a quick stop in her apartment to put the mollusks in suspended storage and then brought out the mostly full net from her gem and entered into The Nest.

 

The Nest was a bustle of activity and noise as usual. Second phase gemlings were helping wash and prep the vegetables and fruits grown in one of the greenhouses and pearls were doing more complicated prep and the cooking. Jolt was in charge and YT was helping her. Jolt and the gemlings were very excited to see what 11 brought.

"Oh perfect, I have water boiling already," Jolt called over the din, "hand that over to YT so she can clean and get them going."

 

"11!" Sparks called, "would you mind tending to this emerald in first? She's less fussy with you and I promised to play with some of the seconds."

"Sure, just one sec!" 11 called. She handed the net to YT and then strategically slipped through everyone working and headed to where Sparks was sitting at the table with the other pearls tending to first phase gemlings. 

 

11 eagerly took the little bluish green emerald gemling who instantly cooed and grabbed 11's nose.

"Thanks Boss, just fed her formula recently. She's been asking for energy too, sometimes, Tank can help with that if it happens." Sparks said right before she was dragged away by a rowdy group of second phase gemlings chanting something 11 couldn't determine.

 

11 greeted Tank, a pearl she hadn't known well in The Jackknife since she came in with Usurper, but who 11 certainly knew well now. She was always helping with the gemlings. It hadn't been something she was sure about at first, but after her first rotation, she never took a break and she never wanted one. 

"Bis2 has been very excited that she's going to be with you and Doc this rotation." Tank smiled. "She has a new song idea she's very excited about."

 

11 blew a raspberry on the little emerald's belly gem and made her squeal in delight, "We already have our apartment all set so we can play after dinner."

"Good," Tank's face fell a little and she scooted closer so 11 could hear her better over all the other sounds without talking loudly, "just so you know, she's been having some really intense recurring nightmares about Chrysoberyl."

 

11 frowned, "Anything particular? Ways to help?"

Tank sighed, "She hasn't talked to me about it. Doesn't want to. I've been encouraging her, but you know I won't force it since that doesn't do any good. Just keep nearby when she's sleeping to be there if she wakes up. Who knows, she trusts you and Doctor the most so she may open up more with you two."

11 nodded, "Thanks for the heads-up. By the way, where is Doc?"

 

Tank chuckled, “Some of the thirds dragged her away to show her something.  And when she gets back she’s already promised to read the seconds.  You know how they all love her.”

11 smiled and nodded, “Yes, they did all get to bond with her before all this.”

 

11 remained at the table chatting with the others and tending to the little emerald after that.  Doc and the third phase gemlings with Bis2 came in right before dinner was served.  Doc came over, checked 11’s gem, gave her a kiss, and then went to the kitchen to help make sure all the gemlings got their food.

 

Dinner was chaotic as usual.  Most of the gemlings were always excited about food, but tonight they were even more excited since it was one of their favorites.  It was messy too since some of them only like to eat the flesh and had to remove the shell.  Bis2 sat next to Doc and 11.  She liked to very meticulously remove the meat and then keep the shells as intact as possible for her projects.

 

Sparks came back for the emerald gemling just as Doc brought over a rather large portion of food for 11 and hot tea for both of them.

11 grimaced a little, “This is quite a bit, my love.”

Doc nodded, “Yes, you’re pale and your gem feels a little warm, you need it.”

 

11 sighed and accepted her fate.  Doctor had given her plenty of the salad with a quite bitter leaf that was one of 11’s favorites at least.  It didn’t help satiate The Hunger much, but it made the other food more palatable for 11.  11 actually ate some of the softer parts of the shell since she rather enjoyed the taste and added texture.  Thicker and harder parts of the shell she delicately pulled the meat out and gave to Bis2 for her collection.

 

There was a small squabble between two gemlings over the last of the crustacean, but Jolt easily redirected them and helped them figure out how to share. After food was done, 11 and Bis2 led cleanup so Jolt and YT could go back to moving YT into their apartment.  Doc and a few of the other pearls played imagination with the seconds and then helped them wind down with story time. Most of the thirds left again to enjoy a little more time outside before bed.

 

Once dinner was completely cleaned up and everything was away, Tank and Sparks took over bedtime rituals for the gemlings that would be staying in The Nest so those getting one on one time with a particular mother or a pair of mothers could go back to their apartments.  They had a whole schedule to make sure all the gemlings had an even amount of time with each other in The Nest, and one-on-one time with a main mother. It was perhaps not the simplest system, but they found it worked for them and the gemlings loved both their sense of community and independence, as well as being able to rely on the adults and get more individual attention.

 

Bis2 was still full of excitement as she went into the apartment with 11 and Doctor.  After she set up the couch with her blanket, pillow, the data pad with the book she was reading and her other data pad for a book she was writing, she moved to music.  Dinner and clean up had taken longer than usual, so they didn’t have as much time as Bis2 wanted before the need for sleep caught up with her.

 

They had enough time to get Bis2’s drum kit set up though and discuss this new song she was so excited about.  It was about a lonely creature that wandered the forest, misunderstood and shunned by all who saw it, howling through the night in search for companionship.  She had the most work done on drums and lyrics since she would be playing drums and backing vocals.  She wanted Doc to play her harp through most of the piece and had some chords and loose melody ideas.  For 11, she had a basic guitar riff, directions on lead vocals, lyrics, the need for a “super awesome, amazing, otherworldly guitar solo” and some Shadow howls at a few points to represent the beast.

 

Bis2 really wanted to actually play more, but she kept yawning and even started nodding off.  11 and Doc assured her they could spend all day after breakfast working on the new song to convince her to go to sleep.  Bis2 reluctantly agreed since she could barely keep her eyes open. 11 tucked Bis2 in and kissed her on the forehead while Doc changed the living room lights to sleep mode. The lights remained on, but took on more red tones.  They found this was the best for both the gemlings and pearls when sleeping, both because bright light was a little hard to sleep in, but also because the low frequency red light was absorbed particularly well by their gems while they slept.

 

Before 11 could leave, Bis2 gently grabbed and said, “Wait, 11, Doctor, can I…well, it’s just, I, uh, well…I have a request.”

“What is it, little one?” Doc came over and gently rested her hand on Bis2.

“Would it be alright, before you go, you know since you’ll be gone for a while, could we…could we have another rotation where you’re my mains? I know it’s sooner than usual, but you’ll be gone for so long and it’s going to be so uncertain when you can return and I just- I’d like more time. If that’s okay?” 

 

Doc and 11 both glanced at each other and nodded and then smiled.

“Of course Bis2.” Doctor nodded.

“Sure it’s off schedule,” 11 said, “but I think the situation warrants a little flexibility.”

Bis2 smiled and mumbled something as she fell asleep.

 

Doc and 11 retreated into their room and sat in bed, chatting about the gemlings and then reading.  Eventually 11 had to leave, Hunger gnawed at her and reminded her of the mollusks she had collected.  Since she wanted to cook them, she decided to go to The New Great Tree.  They had a park all around it with a fire pit she could use.  Doctor asked if she wanted company, and honestly, she did, but she mentioned what Tank had said about Bis2 and her nightmares so Doc stayed.

 

11 found 3-9 at the park, sitting in the dark and staring at the tree. The mothers almost never saw 3-9. Not since Haven was built.  She stayed nearby for safety, but she didn’t live in the dorms with everyone else, and never participated in any community events.  She tidied around the village and made contributions while everyone else was in the light of a building through the night.  No one made her do this.  Several had tried to reach out to her and get her to come out during the day instead. But she did it all the same.

 

11 had planned to go to 3-9’s after eating to talk with her, so this worked well.  She hadn’t exactly forgiven 3-9, and she didn’t exactly trust her, but she didn’t hate her either.  She wished 3-9 wouldn’t isolate and punish herself, but she had no idea how to break her out of it. No one did.

 

When 3-9 saw 11 she blushed and stood, going to rush away.

“3-9, wait,” 11 called, “join me. There’s something I’d like to discuss with you.”

3-9 hesitated but came over and sat on the other side of the fire 11 had created in the pit.  

11 placed the grate over the pit once the fire was stable and then added the deep pan and the salt water she brought with her.  As that came up to temp, she looked at 3-9 and sighed.

 

“It’s still a little ways out, but sooner rather than later, some of us will be leaving.”

3-9 glanced up and then looked at the ground again, “Are we going to be under attack?”

11 shook her head, “Stars, I hope not.  The plan is to avoid that. And to avoid that, we’re going to go and overthrow the Diamond Authority.”

3-9’s eyes widened, “Oh. And you want me to go with you?”

 

The water started to boil so 11 added the mollusks and covered the pan, “No.  I want you here. We need pearls here who can fight and keep everything going.”

3-9 frowned and held herself, “Surely you don’t trust me with that.”

“3-9,” 11 sighed, “look, I can’t make you believe this, but I want you to be apart of us again. To find a place. To heal the wounds of our past as much as possible rather than to lay in the festering ooze. Proving you can do that by helping keep Haven safe and functional would be a great first step.”

3-9 glanced up briefly and then looked at the Tree.  There was a long silence.

Finally 3-9 whispered, “I suppose I can do that.”

11 shook her head, “No, I need more certainty than that 3-9. This is important.  Do you care about Haven or not?”

3-9 frowned and then nodded, “I want everyone here to live long and happy lives. So yes, I care. And yes, I will do my part to protect Haven while some of you are away.”

11 nodded, “Good. That was all I wanted to discuss.”

 

There was a long pause.  3-9 lingered. She usually didn't.

11 looked at her and then looked at the Tree, "You know, deep down, I still believe in you. When I was new to The Jackknife, before I trusted any of you besides Doctor, there was you. You and 3-2. You approached me, offered to help, respected boundaries and my hesitancy to trust, connected me with the others to get the story that helped me not panic my first Dark Time.  I had never been able to rely on other pearls before. That was important to me. It still is."

 

3-9 scoffed, "It was 3-2's idea to approach you when she heard 5-7 ask for someone in Strand 3 to check in with you. And whatever we built, I threw it all away. For nothing. For paranoia. For-" she fought tears and went silent.

 

3-9 didn’t stay much longer after that.  11 didn’t stop her either. She sighed heavily once she was alone.  She never really knew what to do with 3-9.  She wanted to at least keep trying though.  11 stared at the Tree and couldn’t help but remember The Jackknife.  Like some distant howling reminding her the universe is full of danger.  So 11 looked up at the sky again, to remind herself where she was headed next rather than dwell on where she’d been.

Chapter 5: Shadows of the Past

Doc found herself rereading the same paragraph over and over. She had been anxious since she accepted it was time to leave Haven to take down Homeworld. She had kept trying to reason with herself that it made sense. Because it did.

 

Every time she thought she had finally convinced herself of this though, something else came up.

 

Like thinking about Chrysoberyl.

 

Doctor sighed as her throat ached and her neck to her mouth stabbed her with pain. She tried to push it down. There was so much with Chrysoberyl she just couldn't think about yet. Doc had survived her, but thinking back on it all, especially now that life was so good, was like looking into a black hole that would stretch her out until she was nothing but molecules.

 

Then Doc heard something. Muffled and uncertain at first, but when she paused and gave her full attention to the sound, she realized Bis2 was indeed having a nightmare.  Doc got out of bed and slowly raised the lights from night to day mode, waking Bis2 up as gently as possible. Bis2 thrashed a little on the couch and then gasped awake. She panted and her eyes darted around.

 

“Hey little one,” Doctor whispered, her voice throbbing in her throat.

Bis2 turned to her, tried to laugh, and then started sobbing, burying her face in her hands. Doc came over and sat on the couch next to Bis2, placing a hand on her back.

 

Bis2 crawled into Doc's lap and buried her face into Doc like she hadn't done since Jackknife days.  Doctor held her tight and rested her head on the gemling. They stayed there until Bis2 was able to stop crying.

 

Bis2 sniffled as she pulled away just enough to look at Doc, "I-I keep having these nightmares. I try not to, I know a lot of the others still look up to me even though they know they can always go to one of you now. I've never been as good as Bis1 though."

Doc's shoulders hunched a little and she teared up. It was always so hard for her to remember that little gemling.

 

Bis2 blushed, "Sorry, I know I shouldn't bring her up."

Doctor cupped Bis2's face, she had to whisper since her throat was hurting badly now, "No, no, little one, it's not that you shouldn't bring her up. I just…I miss her, too. I wish I had been able to save her."

Bis2 nodded.

 

Doc had to pause to let a stabbing pain at her jaw pass, "And I know she would be proud of you. Of how you took over for her."

Bis2 shook her head, "She was never afraid though and I, I feel like I'm afraid almost all of the time."

Doc fought tears, "She was afraid though, all of us trapped in The Jackknife were afraid. And a lot of us still are, even now that everything is so much better."

 

Bis2 sniffled, "Are-are you still afraid sometimes?"

Doctor nodded, "Yes, absolutely. I think I will be for a very long time too."

Bis2 looked down, "Is that one of the reasons you and 11 have to go and fight Homeworld?"

 

Doc took in a deep breath and huffed, "In a way, yes, it's what we have to do to permanently secure our freedom and stop them from forcing us back into a new Jackknife facility. But, with that comes new fears as well."

Bis2 nodded, "I believe in all of you but, but, I'm worried you won't come back. Homeworld is so powerful."

"I know little one, I worry we'll lose some of us as well. But that's also why my role is so important. And why the roles you will have here are important. We are support."

 

Bis2 smiled a little and nodded, "Yeah, yeah. Um," she frowned again, "Doc?"

"Yes, little one?"

Bis2 started crying, "Do you- it's just- it's probably silly, but," Bis2 paused for a long time but whispered, "Chrysoberyl is really dead, right? We didn't find her gem and 11 can't identify individual souls she consumed but we know Chryso is gone, right?"

 

Doctor held Bis2 close again as her scar glowed. She had tried to prepare herself for this. When 11 told her Bis2 was having nightmares she figured it would be something like this. It was something she herself had nightmares about. She tried to logic it away, but it was so unsettling that they didn't find Chrysoberyl's gem. They couldn't absolutely confirm she was gone.

 

Doc calmed herself enough to let Bis2 pull away, "We're safe from Chrysoberyl. I know it's hard, we didn't get to confirm she was gone like so many others. But she was one of the first ones to encounter 11 in her Fear transformation before she learned any amount of control. And Jolt may not have seen her be eaten by 11, but she heard it. On top of that, some of the sensors on that floor were damaged, but it did seem like the breach that destabilized the floor would have caused a massive pressure change and an intense rush of water. And we were there long enough for her to have reformed and taken control of the station, but she didn't."

 

Bis2 nodded and started sobbing, "I'm always so scared I'm going to go to sleep and when I wake up I'll be back in our old room and some gemlings will have been taken to the Harvester. Or I have nightmares of how she'd beat you so badly whenever she was angry because we did something she didn't like or even if we did nothing at all. Like that time we were all asleep and she literally dragged you up out of the pile and just started screaming and hitting you. I couldn't even tell what she was saying. But we couldn't have done anything, we weren't even awake! And then she- she," she couldn't finish the sentence as she cried harder.

 

Doctor cried as well. She did remember this incident. Chrysoberyl had been mad at orders Alexandrite had given and took it out on her, beating and raping her in front of the gemlings. She had tried to plead for Chrysoberyl to stop and they could both go to her room but Chrysoberyl silenced her. She never forgot how absolutely horrified and filled with terror they all looked once Chrysoberyl pulled out and dragged her away.

 

"I was so scared she was taking you to the Harvester with how angry she was and how she was dragging you," Bis2 continued through sobs, "or that she was going to shatter you just by beating you the way she was. And then the other thing she did. We'd never seen that. I thought that was the last time I would see you, that the last moments we'd all have together was you being hurt and us not even trying to help."

 

"Oh," Doctor sniffled, "oh. Bis2, it's good you didn't interfere. She absolutely would have Harvested any gemling that tried to help me when she was angry like that. There was no reasoning with her when she was raging. And she was so fast, and so strong. And none of it was ever your fault Bis2. Chrysoberyl was power hungry and unstable and violent. It wasn't about how well you behaved, just as it wasn't about how well I pretended to be the pearl she expected.  I wish, I wish I had been able to protect you all more and protect myself better, but I couldn't. Chrysoberyl was just, she just had so much power." 

 

Bis2 hugged her tight again and they both sobbed. Doc could feel Bis2's form getting cold but her gem warming. She needed more sleep.  That wasn't feasible to happen quickly though. Doctor rocked back and forth and tried to soothe her, so they could get to a point where the gemling could sleep. She wished she could sing, but she had lost her voice now.

 

Thankfully 11 came home. She was worried, but asked quietly if it was a nightmare. Doc nodded and Bis2 reached for her as well. They ended up all in their room. Doc and 11 didn't need sleep, but they had Bis2 with them in the bed, safe and warm in the middle so she could get some sleep that was hopefully more restful. 11 managed to sing the gemling to sleep.

 

It was a long night. Neither of them dared to move, wanting to make sure Bis2 got the sleep she desperately needed. Doc felt herself shell a little. She couldn't stop thinking about Chrysoberyl. She didn't want to, but her thoughts just kept reminding her of all the gemlings she hadn't been able to save. Like Bis1, the gemling that called her Mom.

 

She had cried so much earlier she no longer was now, but she felt like she should be. All that abuse that happened in front of them, to the only grown Gem they thought of as kind and looked up to. She was one of their few sources of safety, and Chrysoberyl tore that illusion down constantly. An illusion they needed, they were gemlings, young, scared, vulnerable, trying to find some sense of routine and security. And Doc couldn't help but think of how much she'd failed to give them that even though she knew it wasn't her fault.

 

When the morning came, Doctor still felt disconnected from herself and her voice was still gone. She didn't want Bis2 to feel bad though. She forced herself up, forced a smile, signed to Bis2 as the gemling woke up more that she was so proud of her for opening up. Made sure to encourage Bis2 and assure her they were safe now. Bis2 seemed a little quiet, but happier over all.

 

11 offered to handle group breakfast solo with Bis2 and Doc accepted it. She was only able to keep this mask she had on up for so long. Once Bis2 and 11 left to The Nest Doctor immediately headed to Sickle's apartment next door.

 

She felt so relieved the second she saw Sickle's face.

"My dearest and oldest friend," 5-7 greeted in Nacreous, "what is wrong?"

Doctor smiled and signed her request to come in.

Sickle, of course, let her in and started a pot of tea.

 

Doctor couldn't help but start crying as she explained what happened.  Sickle sat quietly and took it all in. When Doc couldn't even sign anymore because she was so distraught, 5-7 came over with a blanket and sat next to her, wrapping them both up. Then they just sat, Doc crying into Sickle's shoulder. 

 

They moved to the couch with the tea so it'd be more comfortable to sit next to each other.  In a rare occurrence, Doc's hands had been shaking. They finally stilled after a few gulps of tea.

That was when 5-7 spoke, "For what it is worth. I think Chrysoberyl was an absolute piece of shit and now I have no doubts that she is a dead piece of shit. We have both seen 11's Fear form, and I saw her in Rage form and out of control. There is no doubt in my mind Chrysoberyl did not survive."

 

Doctor nodded and tried to talk, relieved she could whisper again, even though it still hurt, "And even if she had been the only one to survive, she would have attacked us when she reformed. There's no way her anger wouldn't override her logic that backup would be beneficial."

"Correct," Sickle agreed. "Her ego would not have allowed her to just let us leave or leave herself, not even for backup. And even if she had left to get backup, we were there long enough she would have made it back. I doubt there would be any hesitation on Homeworld's part to recapture us."

 

Doc nodded, "Alexandrite was willing to let Chrysoberyl harvest children to hide less than ideal Reef conditions, there's no way she'd have even told higher ups about it. She would have given Chrysoberyl whatever she needed and told her to handle it before anyone noticed."

"Still though," Sickle added, "it would be more comforting if we had her inert gem. Even if the chance of her returning is so fantastical it could only happen in one of those dramatic stories 3-2 used to like to write. There is a satisfaction and permanency having that physical part of her would have granted."

 

Doc rested her head on Sickle's shoulder again and they sat in silence.  Doctor thought how lucky she was to have a friend like Sickle. So she said so out loud.

5-7 chuckled, "Nonsense my friend, we are both lucky to have each other."

Doc smiled, but it faded fast, "I can't help but feel guilty. I pulled away for so long. Was trapped in that fog. There, but still leaving you alone. You must have needed me, but I was unavailable. I abandoned you for so long."

 

Sickle squeezed Doc and said, "Look at me."

Doctor did.

5-7 started tearing up, but her face remained stern and serious, "That is not how I see it, Doctor. You did not abandon me. You were trapped in that fog for a long time, yes, and I often missed you dearly during that period. But it was because I could so clearly see you were in pain but couldn't express it. I didn't know what to do, I couldn't help. Ultimately, I knew it was because Chrysoberyl was up to something. She was obsessed with you the second she laid eyes on you and kept escalating. I had no doubt that eventually, Chrysoberyl would escalate to the point she would decide the only way to truly possess you would be to shatter you and prevent you from experiencing anyone else. I just didn't know when that would be." She started crying then and looked away.

 

Doctor clasped one of Sickle's hands, "My dear friend, I, I didn't know that was a worry you had."

Sickle chuckled, "You had other things to focus on, like surviving. And helping as many of us survive as possible. Do not discredit yourself. Even when you were in your deepest shells, you would rise up to save one of our lives. I always admired that. It was your spark that could never be extinguished."

 

Doc squeezed 5-7's hand again. She was feeling a lot better now. "Thank you. So tell me, what was your spark that could never be extinguished, hm?"

Sickle smirked, "Oh pure spite and stubbornness, clearly."

Doc laughed and 5-7's smirk broadened.

 

Then Doc teased, "Hmmm, I don't know dear friend, if you ask me, I think it was love, you sappy romantic."

Sickle blushed and her mouth kept going to form words, smiling and then trying to say something else.

"Ha," Doctor teasingly exclaimed in triumph, "got you. I know you well, after all."

 

Sickle rolled her eyes and playfully shoved Doc, "All right, all right, my passion for Lefts and wanting to return to her may have been a good motivator, yes."

As they both giggled they felt themselves staring to fuse and leaned into it.

 

Oddly, they never fused except for medical reasons in The Jackknife. Even though they were close for so long and weren't opposed to the idea. It wasn't until they could relax here in Haven that it happened. They always had so much fun too. 11 had learned to prepare for a barrage of wisecracks and satirical remarks and more giggling than either of them did separately. They liked to dance a lot too.

 

They didn't dance this time. Deciding to just hang out on the couch, arms around each other's shoulders, communicating solely through their fusion. It was very refreshing.  And uplifting. There was this invincible feeling they always got together that would linger a little after as well.

 

Eventually the need to return to 11 and Bis2 pulled strongly at Doc.  She knew that by now they’d be back in the apartment.  She was feeling better and she did want to keep her promise with Bis2 and work on the new song.  Sickle felt this too and squeezed her tight. She pulled away from their fusion.  Doctor reluctantly let her go.

 

Sickle stood and stretched, “I actually have to meet up with Jolt and YT soon.  They have been working on a way for me to recall my bolas after throwing them.  So far I just narrowly avoided hitting myself in the face, I have broken a window, and one time they flew so off course it got Jolt in the gut. So it should be interesting. They may end up being busy setting up YT’s new room and workshop, but they did not cancel, so I should go.  Maybe I can even just lend a hand.”

 

Doc stood as well, “Well have fun with that.  Please don’t hurt yourself."

Sickle smirked, "Oh I will not hurt myself, others? Eh, no guarantees."

Doctor chuckled and they both left the apartment. Sickle went to the elevator and Doc returned to her apartment. 

 

Bis2 was happy to see her, "Oh good, you're back!."

"Good visit with 5-7?" 11 asked.

Doc smiled and nodded, "Yes."

"Oh! Your voice is back!" Bis2 perked up.

"It is." Doc confirmed, "how was breakfast?"

 

"Good," Bis2 shrugged, "everyone seemed normal. Tank made us pancakes too, which are one of my favorites."

"Oh good. You two didn't have to wait for me before working on the new song, by the way." Doc replied.

Bis2 blushed.

"Actually, we talked it over and we think going to the beach would be better today." 11 offered.

 

"I'm still thinking a little about my nightmares," Bis2 whispered, "and I don't want this song associated with them."

Doc nodded, "Very wise, Bis2. Plus you know 11 and I love the beach so we certainly won't balk."

Bis2 beamed, "Yeah! And I want to collect more shells. I have this whole underwater palace miniature I want to build."

 

They grabbed one of the medium sized solar sleds from community storage. It was bulkier even when folded, but much faster than the scooter and they could all fit on it. They made it to the beach a little before midday and had a wonderful time. 

 

Doc felt much better as the day went. She had fun helping make dinner that night as well, and both 11 and herself helped Bis2 start her underwater miniature. Bis2 was sleepy early, exhaustion still plaguing her after her restless nights.  Doc decided then that soon she'd get 5-7 and 11 together and start tackling and talking through all the awful things Chrysoberyl had done. So she could heal more and help Bis2 heal more as well.

 

For now though, she was in a good mood. Once Bis2 was sound asleep, 11 and Doc went to their room. Doc closed the door. 

"We can't listen for Bis2 with the door closed, love." 11 said and then started changing.

Doc smiled and wrapped her arms around 11, stopping her from dressing, "It's temporary. Besides, it also means Bis2 can't hear us."

 

11 smirked as Doc began kissing her neck and rubbing 11's nipple between her thumb and index finger, "I suppose that's true."

Doc spun 11 around and then somewhat forcefully pushed 11 on their bed. Then she smiled and slowly began undressing. They were passionate and clawing at each other this time. It didn't last long, but it brought a bliss that made Doc's gem glow so bright she had to close her eyes from the intensity.

 

They dressed and opened the door after to listen for Bis2. Then they snuggled up into each other on their bed. They didn't plan on sleeping, but they wanted to hold each other for a while. And, for the first time in her life, Doc had an afterglow. She chuckled and blushed.

 

"Well, well, well," 11 teased and kissed Doctor's neck, "looks like you can afterglow after all."

Doctor blushed even more and sighed happily as she looked at 11's gorgeous face bathed in the soft purple light coming from her gem, "I guess I just needed to be in the proper mood."

Notes:

Guess who absolutely forgot to upload last week despite having a reminder? Meeeeeee, haha. Oops.

Chapter 6: The Raid

11 checked over everything for what felt like the fiftieth time.  She was nervous.  Everyone in the ship was.  It was still weird being off planet, even though they had been off planet several times now, but it was even weirder to be heading towards a Homeworld facility. One they planned to raid.

 

It wasn’t a large or populated facility. Instead, a secret lab on a moon around a colony that had long been dried up of all the resources Homeworld considered useful.  There weren’t many Gems either.  Five quartzes, a grey tourmaline, a pair of iolites, 1-8, and a howlite that was being held prisoner.  The howlite had been caught fusing with an azurite and both had been previously sent to The Lab at the Jackknife.  The azurite didn’t make it, but the howlite somewhat did.  She was less conscious than 1-8 from what they observed in the security feed Jolt had tapped into.  She was more conscious than any of the mothers that had been experimented on before 1-8 though.  

 

The tourmaline had two experiments going with these prisoners.  To howlite, she was trying to artificially fuse with shards from other Gems exposed to Shadow that showed residual Shadow power.  To 1-8, she was trying to harness what she was calling The Vision.  From everything 11 had read from the reports, it sounded like 1-8 had gained the sight Shadow had to see life energy, but it was also different.  It was like she could also see glimpses of the past and future, but they were more confusing ghosts haunting her than clear visions like a sapphire had.  There was accuracy to the ones 11 and the mothers knew though.  At first, they thought she must have connected up with 2-9 over the distance, as she wailed and described 11 in Fear form for the first time perfectly.  Except Doc pointed out the date of the log and when they compared it to The Jackknife logs realized she had this vision a good three months before it happened.  They checked all the other log dates and realized a few happened after the event occurred as well as before.

 

11 was relatively sure she could stabilize 1-8.  That all she needed was a few more souls to power this new ability and then she’d be more like Jolt and Justice.  Not as powerful, 11 was unsure if 1-8 would even be able to fully transform, but it should give her enough control to only use her Vision when she wanted to.  All they had to do was break her out of this facility.  

 

It was a straightforward enough plan.  Since this facility was in a rather deserted location and was a science facility that no longer needed to observe the planet the moon was in orbit of, none of the Homeworld Gems really scanned the space around them.  They only scanned within to keep an eye on their two captives. So the approach was without issue, especially with their cloak.

 

Jolt and YT had developed a weapon utilizing hardlight and mounted it to the ship.  So first they would blast their way in, take out all the quartzes, researchers, and howlite. YT had also developed a device the mothers could wear on their wrist to create artificial stasis bubbles that acted exactly like the bubbles they used to be able to make before the mother of pearl procedure. So they’d bubble all of these Gems and send the bubbles to a stasis field in the ship for extra security. They’d scatter fake shards Doc had developed with Sickle and Jolt as they went.

 

Then 11 would find and stabilize 1-8, and they’d get her on the ship.  On their way out, they’d damage the facility almost to the point of complete destruction, erase the correct records, and replace them with false records that would have just enough to suggest something had gone wrong with the experiment.  The hope was that this would not only prevent Homeworld from connecting this attack with the mothers of The Jackknife and figuring out they had escaped rather than been presumed shattered as the official record currently stated, but also deter future projects with the Crystals and their realm.   Between the destruction at The Jackknife and this facility without any results, Yellow Diamond was more likely to see less reason to dedicate resources to the project. 

 

It seemed like such an easy mission after the mission of escaping from The Jackknife.  Too easy almost.  That was making 11 feel the most nervous.  She tried to keep rationalizing it.  Homeworld didn’t expect rebels, certainly not rebel disgraced mother of pearls who were presumed dead.  So of course these early missions were going to be a cakewalk until Homeworld considered them an actual threat.  The early missions with Rose as a Crystal Gem were extremely easy, too. So this should be no different.

 

It just felt wrong to 11 to willingly walk into a Homeworld facility again.  Even to raid it and rescue a fellow mother.  They had all fought so hard for their freedom and they were still nowhere close to figuring out how to nullify the modification that forced them to obey any order from higher ranking Gems.  They technically could bring a gemling like YT with them since she would outrank a lot of gems in Homeworld’s hierarchy, but there was no way they would put a gemling in the line of fire like that.  Not even a third phase one. 

 

So they would have to rely on confusion, the element of surprise, and whatever resistance 11 had to some orders from hybridization.  At least until they had more Gems join this new rebellion.

 

11 looked at her helmet.  She and YT had patched all the bugs so the voice was still distorted but easy to understand and communications were mostly functional.  11 decided to wear it for this mission.  Even though it wasn’t an official mission of the rebellion.  

 

11 stared at the symbol.  The symbol of the Diamond Authority being broken by a perfect circle.  It was oddly fitting that the rebels would be symbolized by a circle.  Bis2 and the other gemlings didn’t know about the Jackknife salute. At least not the details of the idea that disgraced mothers didn’t deserve to venerate the Diamonds directly but still had to acknowledge they were within their sphere of influence. So they had no idea that in some way a circle had ties to being dishonored mothers of pearls.  A symbol thrusted on the mothers that they were now making their own and turning into something to empower themselves and undermine the Diamonds.  Poetic. They all appreciated it.

 

11 had yet to decide what they call this new rebellion.  They wouldn’t be the Crystal Gems or even the New Crystal Gems.  Nor would they call themselves the Freedom Pearls as Usurper had named her group.  They wanted this new rebellion to indicate it was open for all who were willing to stand up against the tyranny of Homeworld’s system, but also be separate from Earth and that war.

 

11 sighed, she still didn’t have any ideas.  She hoped this rebellion would gain its name as the Crystal Gems had, where they hadn’t actually called themselves anything, but Homeworld started calling them Crystal Gems as an insult to imply they were fragile and cared too much.  Rose and Pearl 11 had been very amused by this and decided to take it as a compliment and started proudly calling themselves that.  She figured something similar would happen with this new rebellion as well.

 

“We’re starting our final approach,” Jolt whispered.

Despite how softly Jolt had spoken, it sounded thunderous in the uneasy silence.

“Alright, everyone check their gear and warm-up,” 11 announced, “we’re coming in hot and want to make our attack as swift and precise as possible.”

Doc, Justice, 4-1, Usurper, and Sparks all nodded.  

 

They all checked their weapons and their tech.  Then they began stretching in complete silence.  11 saw Jolt start shaking and struggling to control her Shadow powers.

“Jolt?” 11 asked.

Jolt laughed, but it was a nervous laugh, the type that was too fast and shaky, “Sorry, I don’t know what’s come over me.  Jackknife flashbacks suddenly.”

 

“Maybe a song would help?” 4-1 said, “To get us in the ass kicking mood?”

Jolt nodded and forced a smile, “Ye-yeah, yeah, that’s a good idea.”

So they sang as they finished stretching.  It was a song they had created in Haven.  They beat their chests rhythmically and most of them hummed low and loud while Doc sang high and quiet, calling on the fury from the past but the focus to create the future.  It worked.  All of them felt their nerves still, and a new type of quiet unfurled in the silence that followed their song.  11 placed her helmet over her head.  She now didn’t have a single part of her skin exposed and her identity would be near impossible to determine.  They were ready.

 

The facility was in sight of their viewer now.  Jolt took aim with the Hardlight Canon.  They all drew their weapons and lined up. Jolt would remain on the ship. Doc stood ready at the door.  She would open it the second Jolt landed them at the breach in the hull Jolt was about to shoot.  4-1 was leading the charge, followed by Sparks and Usurper.  Justice, 11, and Doctor would go last.  One team would focus on eliminating the Homeworld Gems, the other, using their power to sense 1-8 and beeline to her. Both teams would place charges around the station once their primary mission was complete.

 

“Remember,” 11 said, smiling a little at the sound of her own voice deepened and distorted by the helmet, “no one escapes, but no one shatters.  We do this exactly as planned.  Keep it clean, keep it focused, keep it fast.”

4-1 giggled and bounced on the balls of her feet, “You got it Boss.”

“Understood,” everyone else said.

 

“I’m about to be in range,” Jolt announced and then there was a pause followed by, “firing in five, four, three, two, one. Target hit, breach successful. Landing now.”

They all crouched and Doc hovered her hand over the open door command.

“Lining up with the breach now,” Jolt said, “and landing in three, two, one.”

The ship shook ever so slightly.

“Dock complete, ready for go.”

 

Doctor slapped the door open.  4-1 cartwheeled out, giggling with glee and followed closely by Sparks and Usurper. They went to the left.  11, Doc, and Justice went to the right.

 

They had an idea where 1-8 would be from the internal scans and security footage Jolt tapped into, but for some reason 1-8’s actual energy signature didn't show up.  11 could see her though with her Shadow vision.

 

They moved quickly, they came across a single quartz and the research team. 11 took the quartz out before she'd even drawn her weapon. Doctor and Justice handled the research team.

 

Doc spread fake shards while Justice sent the bubbles to the ship. 11 kept going, they were so close to 1-8 now. 1-8’s door had a lock that required a key. 11 didn't bother with it. 

 

11 lined her left arm with a shadow arm. It caused a little pain, the hardshadow and hardlight of her form didn't like interacting so directly, but 11 didn't want it to be visible, even though they were erasing this footage. Just to be safe.

 

This addition of the shadow arm made her much, much stronger than usual, and she was already stronger than any of the other pearls after hybridization, so she was able to rip the door to the cell off with ease. 1-8 was inside behind a destabilizing field. She cowered and hid her face and her scars from her self-shatter attempt all started to glow.  

 

Shadow energy surrounded 1-8 and something started to form. Barely visible to 11, just faint outlines of events that just took place.  They seemed to be much more physical to 1-8 though, the way she reacted. She started speaking in a mixture of Nacreous, Common, and Crystal. 11 could sense intense fear and confusion from her.  She only sensed emotions from others outside of fear when they were absolutely overwhelming. 

 

The vague outline of Shadow bore down on 1-8 where she was shielding herself with her arms and a cut appeared there.  The Shadow became more solid to 11’s vision, a large Gem with a blade of some sort. Some sort of vision of the past of future, but it could interact with 1-8.

 

So 11 decided to throw out caution to help 1-8. She removed her helmet and spoke in Nacreous.

"1-8, it's me, 3-11, we're here to save you. I can help."

1-8 stilled and her scars stopped glowing and the outline of the vision wobbled and then disappeared. 

 

11 replaced her helmet, powered down the destabilizing field, and knelt, gently clasping 1-8's shoulders.  1-8 was muttering to herself, her fingers twitching and her body rocking a little.  11 let out a long breath and focused.

 

11 didn't even hear Doc come into the room as she transferred a small bundle of souls from her Inner Realm to 1-8.

1-8 gasped, her eyes changed, looking exactly like Shadow's eyes, and she grew a few spikes on her shoulders, two sets of fangs, and shorter claws. Then she returned to her typical form, looked 11 in the eyes, whispered, "You're real this time," and then passed out.

 

Doc rushed over and scanned her, "Low energy, various wounds to her physical form, although none major, some signs of recent stress fractures to her gem that haven’t healed right. She's stable enough to move, though."

The communicator in 11's helmet beeped and Usurper announced the facility was secure and they were placing the charges to destroy the facility.

11 turned to Doctor, "Get 1-8 to the ship and tend to her. We'll handle the rest."

 

Doc nodded, scooped 1-8 up, and briskly walked back towards the ship. Justice and 11 worked in silence as they placed the charges. Doc sent a communication a few minutes later. Jolt was having a panic attack and struggling to complete her part of the mission of erasing records and planting the fakes. 11 sent Justice to help Jolt and Sparks to finish Jolt's part of the mission.

 

Part of 11 mused about how no matter how easy the mission, things going awry was always a possibility. Still, they were on track for success. Usurper and 4-1 caught up with 11 when she had ten charges left to place. She divided them up and they finished within minutes and returned to the ship.

 

Jolt and presumably Justice were in a Shadow bubble. Jolt must have had the feeling she needed to contain and conceal herself. Sparks was at the console.

"Status report?" 11 asked.

 

"1-8 is stable. I've healed her injuries and have the HILD on her. She'll probably just sleep for a while. Justice is with Jolt. No signs of overheating when they went in. Ready to go." Doctor answered.

 

Sparks worked a little bit more, "And now that you're on board I have the security footage erased and replaced. You'll need to pilot us so I can take care of the records of our departure and set off the charges."

11 nodded, "Good, Usurper, close the door. Everyone prepare for launch."

 

Once the door was secure and everyone sat in their chairs, 11 swapped places with Sparks and Sparks moved to the secondary console.  11 pulled them away gently and slowly moved them out of range of the blast. Sparks worked a bit more and then said she was ready. 11 moved them further away as Sparks destroyed the facility. 

 

Once Sparks confirmed the demolition was complete 11 punched it, going as fast as the ship could and setting it for autopilot. She realized she was still wearing her mask so she took it off as she turned around.

 

4-1 squealed, "We did it!"

11 smiled, "We did it. Well done everyone. Things perhaps could have gone a little smoother, but everyone adapted well and our objective is complete. Now we get to bring 1-8 home." 

 

They all smiled and looked at 1-8.

"I bet she's going to love Haven," 4-1 said and then squealed again and started doing cartwheels, "how are you all so calm? We did it! They didn't even know what hit them!"

Doctor mused, "I suppose a celebration is in order. Let me move 1-8 to the other room first though. She needs rest and quiet."

 

They ended up singing and dancing once 1-8 was comfortable in the only other room on the small ship. Once Jolt's shadow bubble lowered, she ended up going in the room as well. To watch over 1-8, she had said.  11 saw she was feeling guilty and tried to approach her to tell her it was alright, but Jolt said she wasn't ready to talk yet.

 

1-8 was still asleep when they arrived in Haven. They moved her to what would become her apartment if she wanted it. For now it was an empty kitchen/living room and a room with just a bed, but she could customize it once she was awake. Doc left a bracelet on 1-8 that would alert her when 1-8 woke up.

 

All of Haven was happy and started planning a celebration to welcome 1-8. Everyone except Jolt. Justice was out and about though. She said Jolt was okay, but needed some time. So they waited, and were patient.

 

Jolt knocked on Doc and 11's door one night.

After she settled at the table with them, Jolt sighed heavily.

"Justice and I have decided to sit this next mother rotation out. We had wanted to get one more in before Remembrance and Celebration, and leaving, but this mission made me realize something."

 

"You know what happened with the mission was okay, right? I mean, obviously not ideal, but we set it up so that it was still successful, and it was," 11 said.

Jolt smiled briefly, "That's very kind. It really wasn't alright though. I'm glad Sparks and you managed, but… I don't want that to happen again. Mainly because it made me realize that I've been neglecting myself."

 

Jolt paused, "I don't know why it didn't happen with the other raids that I’ve led. I guess maybe because those were all storage caches that didn't even have guards? And the field trips you two and I have gone on with the gemlings weren't to Gem facilities?  I don't know. But this mission made me realize I never really worked out most of my complicated feelings about Homeworld and the Jackknife. I love YT and I'm so glad to have her and to raise her as much as I did, and I'm still so excited for my geodes that are incubating. But…well, I also realized I used them as a distraction. Something happy and hopeful to focus on rather than dwell on all the trauma and grief."

 

Doctor nodded, "It caught up to you on this mission."

Jolt teared up and chuckled, "Yeah, yeah it did."

"Is there anything you need from us?" 11 asked.

 

Jolt wiped her eyes, "Yes, I, uh, well, I'm going to go out by myself a bit. The ships in the ocean cave should have thorough maintenance, and I think I need to do it myself. To think and feel and focus on just me.  Here I have too many Gems and things to fall back on to avoid all my feelings. Plus, YT is old enough and Justice will be here for her. It just means I won't be available for my other duties here."

 

11 nodded, "Do not worry Jolt, Sparks and I can handle it. Actually, some of it we'll probably train YT and Hems for as well so they can take over once the rebellion starts."

Jolt nodded.

"Make sure you take plenty of healing supplies and a long range communicator." Doctor said, "And food, in case you have The Hunger increase with all the emotional release."

 

Jolt laughed and sighed, "Thank you. For understanding. I know it's a little inconvenient, but I want to be as ready as I can for the war. Because I will fight. I'm not going to accept these feelings stopping me from helping forge a better future. I refuse ."

11 nodded, "Take the time you need. The road ahead will come with enough strife, it's good to unload as much burden from the past as you can."

 

Jolt nodded, "Right. I'll head out tomorrow then.  I think I'll do Remembrance alone, but I'll come back for Celebration."

11 frowned. "If you're sure. Remembrance is intense, you know if you need to you can come back. Take the fastest solar sled. So you can get back quickly. Just in case."

Jolt agreed, "I'll want to take quite a bit with me for repairs as well."

 

Jolt set out the next day.  It was good for the ships to have an overhaul before they set out, and it was good for Jolt to work through the past more to be ready for war.  11 couldn’t help but worry.  She always had been a worrier.  She wished Jolt had at least taken one other mother with her. 

 

11 understood though.  The need for solitude.  The need to train alone and work through things.  She did it herself, after all.  She idly wondered if Doc or her friends ever felt similar worry all the times 11 had gone out for solo training.  It hadn’t been her intention.  She hoped they understood.

 

1-8 started waking up a few days after Jolt left.

Doctor gasped and smiled when she noticed, “Come on, let’s head over.  I want to give her a little time to look around, but I don’t want her to get too nervous or confused.”

11 and Doc didn’t linger too long on their way to the elevator and to the level 1-8’s apartment was on.  Doctor monitored 1-8’s vitals on the way.

 

“Alright, she’s fully awake now.  Stress level seems good considering she just woke up in a strange room.” Doctor announced.

“Time to say hello then.” 11 confirmed. 

They walked down the hall and gently knocked on 1-8’s door.

 

After a pause, there was an uncertain response in Nacreous, “Come in?”

1-8 was in a corner with her hands clasped when they entered.  Her eyes were wide and shoulders hunched.  She relaxed a little as she saw them.

“Th-this is real, right? This is actually happening? You saved me? And stabilized my powers? I do feel a lot better. Before, it was like I was stuck in this veil of existence. I could barely even think. Now though, now things are clear. I think.  I mean, they feel a lot clearer.  I haven’t had a single vision and nothing is…fuzzy?”

 

Doctor approached and tilted her head down a little, “Feel my gem.”

1-8’s hand shook a little as she reached up and placed her hand on Doc’s pearl.  Then 1-8 teared up and shuddered, “I can feel your energy pulse.  Oh, you’re real, this is real.”

1-8 rushed into a tight hug and Doc hugged her tightly back.  Then 1-8 came over to 11 and they hugged each other tightly as well.

 

“It’s so good to see you again 1-8.” 11 fought tears. “For so long we thought the experiment had shattered you.  That’s what Chrysoberyl said had happened.”

1-8 shook her head, “Of course she said that.  It, it didn’t. But it gave me these powers, to see things that had happened or might happen.  But they were always so jumbled, and sometimes, sometimes I’d get hurt on my physical form from them.  Only on really strong visions.  But I could never tell when it would happen. And there would be these long periods where the visions were non-stop and I couldn't control them and I couldn’t even tell what was a vision and what was real anymore.  Some of it wasn’t even just from our realm, but also from her’s, from The Shadow’s. I take it you were touched by The Shadow too, 3-11?” 

 

11 and Doctor caught 1-8 up on everything. New names, 11 being hybridized, the All Hands Event, the escape, settling Haven, the gemlings, and the plans for starting a war with Homeworld.  1-8 asked a lot of questions, and also remained quiet for a while sometimes, taking it all in.  It was a lot of information.

 

1-8 held herself, “So we’re free, and we’re safe, for now?”

11 nodded, “Yes, and I plan to keep it that way.”

1-8 bit her lip, “Right, by overthrowing The Diamond Authority.  We truly would forever be free then.”

“Exactly.”

 

1-8 was quiet a bit longer and then blushed a little, “I don’t supposed, I mean…it was so long that I was gone…none of the gemlings are mine are they?”

Doc hesitated, “One is. A pearl.  Chrysoberyl held her and few others in stasis as a backup.  She bursted not too long ago and about five years ago grew into second phase.  You don’t have to raise her if you don’t want to, though.”

“What do you mean?” 1-8 asked.

 

Doctor explained the system they had in place for the gemlings and the different options for all the mothers. 

1-8 smiled, “That’s amazing.  I love it. I, um, I would like to main for my gemling then, if that’s okay?”

Doctor smiled, “Of course.  We have a training course we developed that Tank can walk you through.  And to give you time to set up your apartment.  Then we’ll connect your room up with The Nest.”

 

1-8’s smile broadened, “Oh, how amazing.  This all seems too good to be true!”

11 chuckled, “Oh trust us, we understand that.  But it’s real, 1-8.  We did it.  We survived, and we are thriving.  You can live again, as we are living again. If you’re up for it, I can give you a tour of Haven?  Have you see everyone who can help you set your apartment up the way you want and show you around? Or do you need more rest?”

1-8 grabbed 11’s shoulders, “Oh, please, a tour. I’ve been trapped in that cell since they moved me from The Lab.  I need to see the sun! And to breathe in fresh air, and enjoy being outside!”

 

So 11 guided 1-8 around.  Doc slipped away and went to start getting things together for the celebration planned for 1-8.  11 started with the dorms, affectionately called Clam Quarters by a lot of the others.  1-8 loved the sauna and showers as expected, and she was excited for all the activities 11 listed. 

 

Then they went outside. 1-8 fell to her knees and laughed and cried out of the sheer excitement and relief. 11 showed her The New Great Tree and the path to the Arboretum, the greenhouses, the aqueducts and water treatment building. Then she led them towards a quiet part of town. 

“How about we get the most somber part of the tour completed. This,” 11 gestured to an extremely ornate building, with columns at its entrance and a tall steeple, “is the Hall of the Fallen.  Inside we have the shards of all the mothers’ that did not make it out of The Jackknife whole.”

 

1-8 clasped her hands together and whispered, “I want to see.”

11 nodded and led 1-8 in.

Everything was silent and quiescent. 1-8 looked around and took it all in.

 

In the antechamber hung a great tapestry. The first Remembrance they had all woven this tapestry together with the designation and a brief eulogy of every single mother they had shards of.  Done completely in Nacreous of course.  It had taken several days, even with all of them working together without sleep. Each of them had picked mothers they knew the best to create a square to add to the whole.  

 

11 had done one for 3-3 and 4-3, and collaborated with Justice for 3-2, and Pearl 4 for 5-8.  She had also been support for a lot of the others as they made their squares. All of them needed someone through the process. A lot of tears had spilled on each square as it was made.  11 could still remember not being able to contain her wailing as she worked on 4-3’s square specifically.  Her loss had been 11’s first in The Jackknife, and it always had cut her the deepest because of that and how things went with Dumor.

 

In the main hall there were rows and rows of statues lovingly carved of every single mother, recreated perfectly from their memories. Several of the pearls had discovered a passion for stonework as they completed this project and perfected techniques because they wanted something grand and personable for every single pearl that had been taken from them.  At the base of each statue was the carving of a large, open clamshell, and nestled within a bubble with the shards. Light from a stained-glass skylight with the pearl’s favorite colors would illuminate the statues during the day.  At night, the clam part of the statues would glow, ensuring that even the remnants of these pearls were never condemned to another moment of darkness.  

 

1-8 quietly walked with 11 and looked at all the statues.  She stopped and silently cried when she came across a few of her old friends.  11 held out her hand as an offer and 1-8 took it.  They completed the tour this way, ending in another small room.  This one was dimly lit and had a few places to sit.  They called it the Mourning Room, for pearls to sit and cry and remember.

 

They were silent for a bit longer once they left the Hall of the Fallen. Then, when 1-8 was ready, 11 continued the tour.  Everyone was so happy to see 1-8 returned to them and eager to help her later to decorate her apartment and integrate her into the daily happenings of Haven.  So many happy tears and laughter and hugs.  

 

11 ended the tour by leading 1-8 out a little bit to a nearby clearing.  In this clearing, they had created a proper baseball field.

1-8 instantly lit up and gasped, “There’s proper dugouts! And a foul ball net with bleachers behind them! And the markings on the ground! Oh! It’s just like you described to me.  Well, bigger than what I imagined, but that’s even better! And I see the gemlings are getting into the sport.”

 

11 smiled as they watched the gemlings practice, with 4-1 as their coach.

“Wonderful, isn’t it?” 11 commented. “We mothers have teams as well and play each other. We’d love to have you join. Also, you see that little pearl currently in left outfield?”

1-8 squinted and then nodded.

“That’s her, the gemling from your geode.  She has a love of baseball as well.  We never told her about you, we don’t tell the gemlings much about mothers who didn’t get to decide what happened to their geodes since they were not with us at the time, but she fell in love on her own accord.”

 

Excited tears brimmed 1-8’s eyes, “Oh, she’s perfect. Oh, this is all so wonderful. I,” she started crying harder and 11 hugged her.

“Take it all in, and take your time. It’s a lot.” 11 said.

1-8 buried her face into 11’s shoulder and cried even harder, squeezing 11 tightly.

She hiccuped and sniffled as she pulled away and said, “Thank you, thank you, my dear friend. For coming for me. For saving me. You did so much for me already and now-now, oh, I’ll never be able to repay you.”

11 rested her hand on 1-8’s shoulder, “My friend, repayment is not necessary. We take care of our own. Together we thrive, together we rise.”

 

After 1-8 reunited with 4-1, she met her gemling and played baseball with them until the gemlings had to go to The Nest. Once the gemlings were fed and in bed, the celebration for 1-8’s return started at The New Great Tree. It was a wonderful celebration that went through the night.  They sang and danced and played baseball. Justice introduced 1-8 to food, and 1-8 found it delightful. 

 

They ended by all coming together to help 1-8 set her apartment up more.  Some things would need to be custom-built for her, but they got what they could done.  She had a home now.  She became overwhelmed and cried, so most of the mothers quietly slipped away after saying good night.  1-8 asked 4-1 to stay, so 11 and Doc took their leave, Doc reminding 1-8 how to get to their apartment and Sickle’s if she needed any medical attention.

 

Doctor and 11 walked hand-in-hand, deciding to go to the river to watch the sunrise.  They held each other close.  Today was a victory, a triumph, an achievement.  There was something bittersweet, though.  A reminder of all the mothers that had lost.  All the mothers they wished they could show this place to and help create a home for as well.  So they held each other tightly and reminded themselves to be thankful for what they did have. To honor those who didn’t get this chance.

Chapter 7: Remembrance

Remembrance arrived as it did every year. Even though the world around them was the same as it always was, it didn’t feel like it was.  It was quieter and somber.  The New Great Tree, the River, and the Arboretum were filled with mothers quietly sitting. Not sad or anxious exactly, but lacking a spark, a zeal that usually rang through the air as laughter and chatter.  Now there was only the occasional knell of a soft crying, or a shuffle when a gemling in first cried for energy or more attention.

 

The day of, Usurper remained with the second and first phase gemlings and all of the third phase gemlings helped her.  The pearls took turns with who tended the children and who attended the ritual.  YT, Bis2, and Dottie had all come up with a wonderful outing to the beach, to allow the mothers space to mourn and feel. They would even camp overnight.  Something they didn’t do often for safety and the gemlings always adored.  It made the whole thing a special treat to them, which alleviated a lot of stress off the mothers.

 

Doctor and 11 got ready together in silence as they usually did.  Doc was far away mentally, trapped in that fog that had swallowed her so often when they were enslaved.  Sometimes they wondered if this ritual reopened the old wounds more than they helped.  Then they’d get to the end and they’d remember why it was so important to do. As 11 watched her love distant, disconnected, and unemotional though, she wondered any way.

 

The Jackknife clothing was scratchy against 11’s skin as it always was.  With access to so many more materials and the materializer all of their clothing now had a variety of colors and textures and none of them were like the stiffer and itchy gray cloth from The Jackknife.  11 always forgot how it would overload her senses for a bit.

 

Once they were dressed, Doctor and 11 helped each other wrap gray cloth over certain scars, the scars that still impacted them the most mentally and physically. For 11 it was her left arm, eye, and the gray discoloration at her stomach. For Doc, her abdomen and throat. Doctor went to speak, but no sound came out, so she signed, "I love you."

11 pulled Doc close and whispered into her ear, "I love you, too."

 

They held each other until there was a soft knock at their door. It was Sickle, already in her Jackknife dress and her braids piled on her head like a crown, as she wore most often back then. As usual, 11 helped tie cloth around Sickle's left eye as well, and Doctor wrapped cloth around 5-7's waist for her hip scars. 

 

They left all together, holding hands.  Many of the others were already in the commons. There was a low murmur from whispered conversation, but nothing more. Nothing like the lively, loud conversations that usually reverberated off the walls.

 

Once everyone arrived, they all got in a circle and held hands. They all whispered a song, quiet, mournful, and with few words.  Then 11 led them as she always did to The Hall of the Fallen. Inside there were baskets of flowers, unlit candles, various small crafts, and some cleaning supplies.  Without a word, they picked up items and cleaned and decorated every single statue.  They made sure every single one and the surrounding area was free of dust, adorned with flowers and other gifts, and lit by candles. Sobs and whispers came and went.  Occasionally there were even a few quiet chuckles, reminiscing about old times with friends now lost and telling events that had happened in Haven since last Remembrance.

 

After every statue was complete, they all sang together again.  Three songs this time. One, for remembering, one for anguish, and one for anger.  There was silence again.  They were mostly all sitting near statues most precious to them.  Slowly they started filtering out in small groups to follow traditions they’d all established amongst themselves.

 

Eventually, Doc, 11, Sickle, Justice, 4-1, Pearl 4, and 1-8 left together. They went to the courtyard around the Concert Hall, a large structure designed specifically for everyone to play in and where Remembrance would end. Music and dance was how this group would express themselves.  They needed that outlet in order to channel the overwhelming and complex feelings about the past. 1-8 wasn't sure exactly what would be best for her, but she knew pearls in this group the best.

 

Sickle loosely wrapped a grey headscarf around herself. She didn't have this in Jackknife days, but she made it from the same material when she discovered having her head wrapped and face partially covered like with her shawl comforted her and allowed her to emote more. Once this was in place she began to play and sing about death and devastation. 11 joined her on her cello and Doc her harp. The others danced.

 

The rest of the day went by. They talked, they played more songs, and they danced. They remembered. At one point 11 had to withdraw within herself, leaning against the wall of the courtyard and taking herself into her inner realm, to the Soul Aquarium, where she could feel her more intense emotions safely. Where she could howl and claw at herself and wail without transforming or hurting her physical body. The surrounding souls would swirl and cry around her until they sounded like a screeching tornado.

 

When 11 felt spent, the souls quieted and stilled until they were their normal meandering fog with soft moans of confusion.  11 heard a song as she walked back and leapt the gap to reach herself.  It was an angrier song.  One Sickle made a long time ago about the nightmare and horrors of the way they had been treated.  Like some twisted and dark fairy tale.

 

11 reconnected with her physical form and gently tapped the ground.  5-7 saw and let her take over singing for the bridge, the plea to break them free of the curse they were under, to awaken again, to rise. The bridge ended and Sickle kept playing. 11 leapt to her feet and grabbed her dance prop as her anger rioted in her chest.  She chanted and joined the others in the circle they were dancing and smacking their props together, “We are the fear that creeps at your neck, we are the dread that turns your stomach, we are your fear, we are your dread,” Sickle’s song became louder and louder, and they all yelled in unison, “we have soaked in your poison, and now we will use it to rot you too!”

 

Justice played next so 3-11 and 5-7, and 4-1 and 1-8, could partner off and dance through their song about White Moissanite.  As usual, Sickle pushed herself to dance more than she really should.  11 supported her as they fused. Their energy exchange helped stabilize 5-7’s legs just a little bit more.  By the end of the song, 3-11 and 5-7 had every single Moissanite scar glowing and clawing at them with pure agony, but they refused to stop, and refused aid from Doctor, whispering synchronously, “I need to feel this.”  They let all the pain wash over them, like the thunderous tides of an angry ocean. They let it consume them until they were numb and exhausted, crumpled in each other's arms like a crushed house of paper.

 

1-8 and 4-1 accepted Doctor’s help with their scars. They cradled each other and whispered in Nacreous, fusing together as well. 

 

Later, Sickle, Justice, and Doctor played another song.  A song Doctor had written.  It focused exclusively on how fragile life was in the Jackknife and how helpless they all felt every time the life of a pearl slipped out of their grasp.  11 danced alone to this, wearing a gray hood that completely shrouded her vision to represent the dead.  The others quietly wept and held each other.

 

As usual at the end of the song, 11 removed the hood, folded it, and placed it at the foot of the courtyard statue, the statue of a pearl gem on a pedestal to represent them all.  She kneeled with her head bowed and her dance prop down in respect.  Like a knight.  A knight sworn to every single life, both current and lost, in Haven.  She spoke a vow in her head just as she had when they first founded Haven, “I vow to all those of Haven to protect, to fight, to raise the cry of outrage and forge a new world.  A world we can be free.  A world where a place like The Jackknife will never exist again. I vow our daughters and all pearls everywhere will never know the pain and savagery we did.”

 

When 11 rose, she saw Doc was breaking down, silently wailing and shaking on her knees where she had collapsed next to her harp, her throat scar glowing furiously and spreading across her face as it did when it was flaring up severely.  Sickle was holding her tight.  11 rushed over and clutched at them both, whispering in Nacreous, “You’re here, I’m here, we’re here.”

Doc’s hand struggled to clasp 11 and bring her close, they lost balance and fell more on their behinds, but that was okay.  They were close, they were together, that was all that mattered.

 

Long after sunset, the others started filtering into the Concert Hall.  Once everyone was inside, 11 and her group joined as well, moving all their instruments into storage except Sickle’s.  They movers her equipment and instrument to the center of the largest room instead.  Once everything was set up, everyone paired up.  

 

Doc moved over to Sickle.  Sickle stripped until she only had the cloths over her worst scars.  She removed the cloth over her eye herself.  Then she tried to remove the cloth from her hips, but was unable to from a burst of emotion, so Doctor removed them and draped it over Sickle’s shoulders.  5-7 pressed her forehead to Doc’s pearl for a moment and then walked to her instrument in the very center of the Concert Hall. 

 

Sickle played the final Remembrance song.  It was called Tears and completely in Nacreous.  5-7 sang how all their tears were shared, blended, one.  How their sorrow was like some desperate gasp for breath, pushing them onwards.  She sang how she had stripped away the past and let the tears flow across her like water bathing away a thick grime.  

 

As she sang, the rest of them danced, staying in the pairs they had already formed.  Doc and 11 danced together.  The pairs rotated around Sickle, moving closer and then farther.  Pulsing around her.

 

Then Sickle sang more, calling the others to join her.  To undress this sorrow and bathe in the tears with her.  They all stopped dancing and stripped as Sickle continued to play.  They folded their outfits neatly and held the bundle close to their chests. As Sickle began to sing again, they all danced away from her and placed the clothes in a circle around them.  Once that was complete, they returned to their partners and danced as they had before. 

 

Sickle again sang to join her.  She repeated they should undress from sorrow and bathe in the tears with her.  They stopped again and removed the cloths tied around their most painful scars.  Ones they were able to remove themselves, they dropped to the floor.  Ones the emotional pain remained too great, they had their partners remove for them and then drape on their shoulders.  A symbol and acknowledgement of the burden unfairly forced on them by the Jackknife still to bear for another year.  A way to give themselves permission to feel that pain and see that they were not alone.

 

11 was able to remove the one from her arm by herself. For the first time, she removed the cloth from her stomach herself, too.  It felt amazing.  Like she was removing a heavy weight and not a light strip of cloth.  She was pleased.  She had finally accepted who she was more now.  That was how she had her new transformation, and that was why she felt so elated now.  

 

Her eye was a different story.  That one had too much attached to it still from White Moissanite and The Lab.  Doc removed that one for her and draped it around 11’s neck.  11 removed the cloth from Doc’s neck when she was unable to remove herself and draped it over Doc’s shoulders.  They held each other close and slowly shuffled together.

 

The song began to crescendo and changed key, going from a minor key to a major one.  Sickle began to sing of hope, of new beginnings, of this cleansing the tears had granted them for another year. They all began to dance more vigorously and sang with her.  They all came together again in a circle and held hands as they sang the very last note.

 

There was a long pause.  Then they all let go and began grabbing their clothes and cloths and heading back to the dorms.  Doc and 11 helped Sickle.  Her legs were starting to give out, so 11 carried her equipment and Doc helped support 5-7.

 

When they got to their apartments, Sickle paused before going into hers and glanced over, then frowned at herself.

“Would you like to join us, my dearest and oldest friend?”  Doc whispered, her voice quiet and slightly distorted, like a glitching computer.

“We’re probably just going to lie in bed and fall asleep.  It’s what we usually do.  We don’t even bother to get dressed.” 11 added.

Sickle looked at the ground but said, “As long as I wouldn’t be intruding.”

 

“Of course not,” they both assured her.

So Sickle followed 11 and Doc into their apartment.  They all placed their clothes on the table and then moved to the room.  Doctor ended up in the middle, her back pressed into Sickle’s back, protecting Sickle’s gem.  11 curled up into Doc’s arms, facing her and pressing her gem into Doc’s collar bone.  11 placed one of her hand’s on Doctor’s pearl, and the other reached around and rested on Sickle.  

 

The three were quietly as they laid there.  They enjoyed the softness of the bedsheets and mattress, and the closeness of so much of their bare skin in contact with each other.  11 couldn’t help but smile.  It was so soothing.  It was something she would have never thought she’d enjoy in her early life.  Being nude and touching others had always been sexual to her in some way before, an expectation, a hope, or a demand. Now, now there was nothing like that at this moment, nothing sexual in the slightest.  Instead, she could just enjoy the different type of intimacy. The type of vulnerability and trust only the deep bonds of friendship they all had could allow.

 

It was one of the things 11 had learned to cherish from her time in The Jackknife.  This change of perception she had gained.  How she had sharpened her boundaries more and critically challenged her own views.  It was a bit of a double-edge sword back then, since at the time those boundaries were often not observed and blurred.  Overall though, she identified what was most important to her, and learned to enjoy the security of support like when mothers would hold each other through and after rough assignments.  How nudity really was just nudity sometime.  And now she always had her boundaries respected and everything was so much better.  

 

They all felt lighter.  Even in their exhaustion.  As always, there had been so much anguish and frustration, and panic throughout the day. Yet at the end of it all, they found peace.  They found stillness.  They found calm.  They found community.  One by one, they all drifted off to sleep.

Chapter 8: Wanted

“Have you seen Bis2?” Tank asked.     

Doctor yawned, "No, but I've been in the greenhouse for the past two weeks. With Celebration coming up, I’ve been making sure everything is ready for our departure after. Is there something wrong?”

Tank shrugged, “Nah, Dottie’s just looking for her.  She tested out of review today, so she’s probably just off playing her guitar or gathering things for whatever project she’s working on.”

 

Doc nodded and yawned again, “I think she’s still working on that underwater miniature she’s been creating for the past several months.  May want to look by the river first.  I know she’s still after very specific sized smooth stones.”

 

Tank smiled, “Thanks Doc, now go get some rest. You look like shit.”

Doctor smirked, “Thanks, always nice to hear.  Think I’ll take a shower first to get all this soil off.”

Tank mused, “Oh yeah, with your partner, I imagine dragging in all that dirt into the apartment would not go over well.”

Doc laughed, “11 does have that cleaning compulsion very strongly, yes.  She would probably kick me right out before I got too far in, or shove me into our personal shower and grumble as she cleaned up.”

 

Doctor and Tank didn’t talk much longer, just a few more niceties.  They weren’t exactly friends, but they certainly weren’t at odds with each other.  They most often just discussed Bis2.  Doc suspected Tank sensed 11 and her wanted to adopt Bis2 and that Bis2 wanted them as her main mothers, but also that something was holding them back.  Tank never pried directly, but she often noted how well the three of them got along and how happy Bis2 always was after a rotation with 11 and Doctor.  

 

Or maybe Tank knew, understood that adopting a gemling only to leave to war in a few months time wasn’t exactly prudent. Yet also understood they couldn’t keep away.  They cared too much about the little gemling to really keep their distance.

 

Idly, Doctor thought about how maybe they’d get lucky, and the war wouldn’t take long, so they could come back while Bis2 was still stuck in second phase and then have her move in once she hit third.  If she wanted.  Doctor sighed, knowing how incredibly unlikely that scenario was.  The war would probably last at least until Bis2 hit third phase.  

 

Doc didn’t bother heading up to the apartment once she got to the dorms, instead going directly to the communal showers, bath, and laundry.  She saw Sickle there, soaking in the fountain.  Doctor waved but did not join her friend after she stripped and placed her clothes in the washer with the community pile.  She was too tired for a soak, even though it would certainly help with her aching and stiff back.  All the work she had done in the greenhouse had really aggravated her scars.  

 

To her surprise though, 5-7 ended up joining her in the showers.

“Are you alright?” Sickle started in her accented Common and then switched to Nacreous, “You look a little rough, dear friend.”

Doctor smiled, “I’m just a little overtired and overworked.”

“Going to soak, then?”

“No, just cleaning up before I go up and get into bed.” Doc frowned then, “Are you alright, dear friend?”

 

Sickle opened her mouth and then shut it tight and gripped herself.

Doc put down the soap and leaned close to 5-7 so she could quietly whisper, “Hey, what is it?  You know I am here for you.”

Sickle blushed vehemently, her cheeks and forehead turning pink. “I…I’ve been lonely.  I have been since we changed from our communal sleeping room to having apartments.  I kept telling myself it was just an adjustment period, and that everyone else seemed to be adapting. I have you two right next door and can go over whenever I need.  But I just…I don’t know, after this Remembrance and with our departure coming up it’s made the feeling worse for some reason.”

 

Doc placed a hand on Sickle’s shoulder, “I wish you’d told me sooner. How about we have a cup of tea in your apartment once I’m done showering?”

“You’re exhausted and-” Sickle started to decline, but Doc interrupted her.

“Ah, ah,” Doc smirked, “I wouldn’t have offered if I minded. A cup of warm tea sounds nice before sleep, anyway.  Especially with good company.”

 

So Doctor ended up in Sickle’s apartment after her shower and cleaning her clothes.  She couldn’t help but look around more as she sipped the bitter and earthy liquid from the warm cup and chatted.  Everything was more spaced out and oversized for a pearl. Sickle hadn’t designed her place for just a pearl, though.  She had designed it to be bismuth sized.  For Lefts.  No one had ever pointed it out, but they all noticed, and they all understood.  It was a hope and a promise that Lefts would return and be healed.

 

Doc smiled, thinking of how Sickle, despite her more aloof and even somewhat stern outward appearance, truly was a deeply romantic Gem.  One that loved with a passion that never burned out, for partners and friends and anyone she cared about.  It made 5-7 feel vulnerable so often, and Doc knew Sickle hated the lack of control when all her emotions overwhelmed her, but it was something Doc had always intensely respected.

 

After a little while Sickle was feeling a lot better and the tea was now gone.  So the two hugged and Doctor left.  In that brief moment she was in the hall, Sparks stopped her.

“Oh, Doc, perfect!” Sparks jogged over, “Do you mind checking out Pear? Her arm stump is bothering her and we can’t figure out why.”

Doctor nodded, “Of course, let me grab my healing kit and then I’ll head to The Nest.”

 

Doc found the apartment empty, 11 out with Pearl 4, Jolt, and Justice. They had a metal band together, Jolt on drums, Justice and Pearl 4 on guitar, and 11 on bass and vocals. Doc thought with a little luck she may come back from The Nest as 11 was coming home and convince her to stay so they can sleep together. It was a little early for 11 to sleep, but both of them found sleep more restful when they did it together.

 

First though, she needed to check on this gemling.  Pear was a little peridot gemling whose left arm was missing from the elbow down. YT had recently made a robotic arm for her and it seemed to always be causing her trouble.  They had made so many adjustments assuming it was the connection with the arm, but Doc had yet to look at it.  

 

Pear seemed nervous when Doctor arrived and started scanning her.  Doc couldn’t find anything wrong.  She wasn’t getting any readings of pain. Pear tried to say the reports of her discomfort were overexaggerated at first, but another gemling near her, Rusty, said Pear wouldn’t even use her robotic arm because of it.  Then Pear said the pain came and went and it just wasn’t happening at the moment.  

 

Doc asked her why she wasn’t using the arm then. Pear stumbled around her words and blushed and then one of the ruby gemlings, Cinder, from across the way yelled, “Just tell the truth Pear! They’re not going to be mad.”

Pear blushed even more and stuttered, “I-I, I don’t know what she’s talking about! Cinder, s-stop just saying random things. I swear there’s nothing going on! I mean, there is, uh, with my stump, but it just comes and goes. I-it’s not a big deal. That’s all.  Everyone just needs to relax.”

 

Several gemlings groaned and rolled their eyes.  Doc escorted Pear away from everyone else, sensing that maybe doing the exam in The Nest had been a mistake.  She usually tended to them all in The Nest since it was easy with them all together.  Clearly there was something more happening here though, something Pear was embarrassed by.

 

“Pear,” Doctor said sternly, but quietly, “please, you need to tell me exactly what’s going on.  Cinder is correct, I won’t be mad. I’m just worried.  Pain coming and going can be a sign of hardlight destabilization.  I know it may seem trivial, but it is imperative I have all the facts to make the correct decisions.”  

Doctor was particular with the words she chose.  She knew this gemling prided herself on her vocabulary and knowledge and sometimes it upset her when the mothers talked with her in more plain terms, even when she didn’t necessarily always know exactly what they were saying.

 

Pear looked at the ground and frowned.  Then she sighed, “I…I have been fibbing. Only a little though!” She added quickly and glanced up, then looked down again.

Doc nodded and asked, "About your arm?"

 

Pear blushed again and nodded, "It doesn't so much hurt to use the robotic arm, I just don't like it. Sometimes it's okay, but most of the time it just, I don't know, annoys me! I feel like I just don't need it, or it's even in my way cuz I kinda still forget to use it. I'm so used to doing everything the way I am. I've never felt like I couldn't keep up, or not do what I wanted, or needed another forearm and hand. But I know YT has worked so hard on making it and everyone expects me to use it and everyone else missing a limb seems to like their prosthetics, so I feel bad. When I said it was uncomfortable and YT mistook that to mean painful I just didn't correct her. I'm sorry. I'll just use the arm and make myself get used to it."

 

Doc sat down all the way, knowing this gemling didn't really like direct physical attention but responded well to someone being nearby, "Oh Pear, you don't have to do anything of the sort. And I think it's us who owe you an apology. Yes, being more forward and open with what you were feeling would have been better, but we should have never made you feel you needed to use a prosthetic. I hope we didn't make you feel there's something wrong with the way your form is."

 

Pear shrugged, "There is though, right? That's why my geode was marked as unfit by Homeworld, that's why I don't have as many hands as most of you, and that's why I require something like a robotic arm to fix it, right?"

Doctor suppressed a frown as she noted they definitely needed to have a talk with the gemlings about this, "It is true that your form is different than a lot of other Gems, and that Homeworld saw that as a flaw that meant your geode wasn't one they wanted. That doesn't make your form a problem to be solved though. The robotics are tools to help you, an option, and if you don't want or need it, you absolutely do not have to use it. There's really nothing inherently bad or wrong about your form. You may find certain tasks more of a challenge since they are designed for forms more like mine, and when you do, come to us, and we'll work on improving our designs so they do work for you, too. And we'll try to be more mindful going forward, and design things that work for everyone as much as we can, okay?"

 

Pear was quiet for a long time, a deep frown on her face as she thought about what Doc had just said, like she still wasn't completely in agreement but had more to consider, "I guess I can kind of see that. So, I don't have to use the robot arm? That's allowed?"

"Absolutely. Do you have any other questions?"

Pear frowned again, "Maybe, I'm not sure yet. I have a lot to think about. May I get back to the others now?"

 

Doc smiled, "Of course, and I'll return the prosthetic to YT and let her know you won't be needing it, alright?"

Pear smiled and chirped, "Thank you," before she scrambled off to join the others.

 

Doctor’s thoughts were churning, trying to formulate how best to approach the topic with the other gemlings and even other pearls.  She didn't like that there was a feeling missing limbs or scars that interfere with some sort of function were seen as something that must be fixed or solved and lessened a Gem's value, but she also knew there certainly were still challenges and downplaying those challenges wouldn't do any good either.  

 

It was different in a lot of ways for the gemlings, their forms as is was their normal, not a reminder of a time of horrific abuse or the feeling of something lost. Doctor sighed as her jaw and back ached at that thought.  She let herself be still for a second, to let her emotions swirl around in her before she acted.

 

Doc gave the arm intended for Pear to YT and explained it wouldn't be needed. Adding that after she slept she'd work with Tank to create a space to talk about the prosthetics and how they are truly optional.  YT felt awful and guilty, but Doc gently grasped her shoulder, "Hey, it's okay. You were trying to help, and sharing a passion that made you feel more secure in yourself and your own experience bursting without a limb. Plus, all of this is new to us Gems, we're bound to not get it perfect."

 

YT wiped away a few tears, "Right, it's about learning and improving, not getting it perfect from the start." 

YT looked away and then looked at her own prosthetic leg, "I guess I just feel a little…rude still. I mean, I was never one that felt less valuable because I only have one leg, not like some of the others, even though Chryso certainly drilled that into us. I did still feel like something was missing, and I didn't know how to describe it because I never had the leg in the first place. This helped though," she tapped on her prosthetic, "and not just a little, it made that gnawing sense of something missing go away almost completely. I guess I just got so excited I forgot to think of how it may be even more different for the others, especially the ones who bursted in Haven, and how maybe this wouldn't bring the comfort it did for me, not on the same level, or maybe even not at all."

 

Doctor smiled, "That's understandable. It's hard to predict how different everyone is, no matter how aware of the existence of difference there is in the first place. I was thinking how it was difficult for us mothers since for us, missing eyes, losing voices, and mobility loss in limbs stems from atrocities committed against us at The Jackknife. There was a more active force taking something from us and a lingering trauma from it all. It's a very different experience and perspective with some overlapping feelings but also completely unique ones in comparison to simply forming without a certain part from the beginning."

 

YT nodded, "It's not painful for us either. For you mothers, the pain is always there, just at different levels. I can't imagine that, I mean, my first models with my leg used to cause discomfort and I still have to take breaks now, but with access to all this tech there's not even that really. As long as I rest it for a few hours a day, it's no big deal. The only chronic element is all the maintenance and even then I only have so much cuz I love to fiddle and optimize, and my particular model is so complicated."

 

Doc nodded and then staggered back a little.

"Whoa," YT supported her, "are you okay?"

Doctor shook her head, "Desperately need rest, is all."

"Let's talk later then," YT said, "so you can go to bed."

 

Doctor grinned, "Well there's a role reversal, hm? You telling me to go to bed "

YT blushed and then burst out laughing, "I guess so. What can I say, between my moms and you, I learned from the best."

Doc chuckled, "Very true. I'll leave you to your work then."

 

Doc managed to make it back to the apartment without getting stopped by anyone else. She yawned as she opened the door. She was surprised to find 11 on the couch with Bis2 crying in her lap. Anxiety clarified her from her sleepiness.  Both seem uninjured except 11 had her left arm in a sling.

 

"What happened," Doctor meant to say in her usual speaking volume but found she could only manage a whisper, "is anyone hurt?"

Bis2 sniffled and shook her head and tried to speak but then looked at 11.

11 nodded, "No injuries. My arm is acting up but I just overworked it. Bis2 is having a bit of a hard time though. She's worried about us leaving."

 

Doctor sighed and felt tension release in her shoulders she didn't know she'd been holding.

"Oh, that's all. I mean," Doctor stumbled a little, sleep tugging at her even stronger now that her anxiety was resolved.

Bis2 scrambled over and 11 stood.

"Mom, are you okay?" Bis2's eyes were wide and brimmed with tears.

 

Doc felt herself stiffen. Mom, Bis2 had called her mom.

Doctor smiled to hide tears and said, "I'm just exhausted, little one."

11 gently placed her hand on Doc's shoulder, "That's right you are overdue to sleep. And you know," 11 grinned, "Bis2 hasn't been sleeping enough, and I'm close to needing sleep. How about you two get to bed, I'll let Tank know what's happening, and then I'll join you, hm? And after we sleep we can do something fun."

 

Bis2 fidgeted, "I would like that. I know I'm not supposed to."

Doc smiled, "An exception can certainly be made considering. Now come, I'm about to fall asleep right here in the living room."

Doctor scooped Bis2 up in her arms and twirled while holding her, making the gemling giggle from surprise and delight. 

 

11 kissed Doctor on the mouth, and then pressed a kiss to Bis2's forehead, followed by blowing a raspberry there and making the gemling giggle again. Doctor took Bis2 to the room as 11 called Tank on her communicator. Doc didn't bother changing, too exhausted. She fell asleep almost instantly once she had laid down, cradling Bis2 close. She didn't even wake up when 11 joined them, keeping Bis2 in the middle.

 

Doctor was the first to wake up. She couldn’t help but smile as she saw Bis2 and 11 both sprawled out a little now, completely relaxed and snoring ever-so-slightly. She took the moment in, the pure serenity, the feeling of invincibility and timelessness.  As a pearl she remembered everything anyway, but this moment, this moment she wanted etched so searingly deep into her memories that it always shone as a bright beacon, no matter how many years passed.  This would be one of her most precious gems of time in all the grains of her life.

 

Of course it had to end.  11 woke up first, smiling with half-opened eyes. Bis2 wasn’t too much longer after, yawning and stretching instinctively as she woke up.  

 

They had a lovely time walking around Haven once they fully woke up.  Bis2 seemed set on making a new memory with all of them at all of her favorite locations in town.  The school, the studio in the community center where she built most of her miniatures, the tree she liked to sit in while creating new music, and the river’s edge where she loved to forage for material or stand ankle deep in the stream, wanting to feel that unwavering current without it sweeping her away completely.

 

Doctor didn’t blame her.  She wanted all of these memories as well.  As many as she could hold.  The future was guaranteed to bring change, but that didn’t mean she shouldn’t enjoy what she had at the moment.  If anything, it meant she should cherish it even more, for all the times she wouldn’t have it.  Doctor looked up at the sky, instinctively towards Homeworld.  They would make a lot of waves when they left on this errand.  And from there, Doctor hoped the waves would keep growing until they crushed the entire Diamond Authority and all they stood for.

Chapter 9: Celebration

11 glanced at Doctor after Bis2 left for school the next day. Doctor seemed distant, lost in thoughts. 11 wondered if they were the same thoughts preoccupying her mind as well.

"What is it, my love?"

 

Doc closed her eyes, fighting tears, “She called me Mom.”

11 paused, she had heard Bis2 accidentally call Doctor Mom, but 11 wasn’t sure why that was so impactful, “Ah, yes, she’s done that to me a few times as well.  I sense there’s something more for you, though?”

 

Doc looked off to nothing particularly and held the back of her own neck.  There was a long pause before she began to whisper, “Bis1 called me Mom.  I let her, sensing it gave her comfort.  It seemed so small and powerful, and I wanted to give her that.  The gemlings needed things like that, just as we needed to clutch at whatever modicum of hope and community we could.”

 

11 waited as Doctor paused again.  There were a lot of things from The Jackknife Doctor still found difficult to talk about.  Not because she couldn’t anymore, but because it was so painful. Well, sometimes because she couldn’t still, but not nearly as often.  11 always wanted to make sure she gave her the space when Doc could and was ready.  She knew recently Doc was really trying to unpack things from Chrysoberyl.  It was hard to wait sometimes. 11 just wanted to hold Doc tight and tell her it would never happen again.

 

Finally, Doc continued, “It started to feel so true.  That I was her mom.  That she was my gemling even though she wasn’t my gemling.  And then I couldn’t protect her.  I couldn’t save her,” tears started steadily streaming down her face, “I tried so hard to save her. I just made Chrysoberyl angry, and Bis1’s last moments were agony before she was thrust into a harvester.”

 

Doctor wiped her tears away, but more fell and she sobbed, “Losing her was so hard.  It was, it was when I had that bleed, the one you discovered my abdomen scar and the Mirror Room.”

11 stiffened, “Oh.  I- I heard her.  When we were fused. I heard a voice I didn’t recognize mixed with Steven’s saying ‘It’s okay Mom’…I, I thought it had just been from me.  That it was a manifestation of my fear of Earth being nothing like I remembered.  It never occurred to me that maybe…maybe we were sharing a feeling.  In sync with the desire to protect and be a part of the life of one we considered our child but…but were unable to.”   

 

There was another long pause.

Then Doctor shook her head, “Dammit.  Dammit.  11, I know it makes no sense for us to adopt Bis2. We’re on the verge of leaving for a war we don’t know the duration of that is extremely dangerous and with no guarantees we will survive. But, but at the same time, she is our gemling . You feel it, I feel, she feels it. Logic be damned, is it really so bad if we grasp at these last few months before we depart and enjoy it as a family? Officially?”

 

11 smiled and chuckled with the realization that ultimately, she and Doctor were having the same thoughts. “I’ve been wondering that, too.  It kept feeling selfish, my desire for us to officially adopt Bis2 when I knew I would be leaving, and that you would be joining me.   After yesterday though…it made me wonder exactly how selfish it really was.  Or if maybe the true selfishness was not embracing the connection in some attempt of maybe sparing us all the pain if the war goes badly.  Because the war can go badly.  Stars, am I aware of how badly it can go.  How those three diamonds can ban together and turn an entire planet’s worth of Gems into mindless zombies, into Corruptions.  Does that mean we should deny these connections that may be ripped away? Or embrace them fully and enjoy every precious moment we can?”

 

Doctor sighed, “Where is that line, that balance, between feeling and thinking?”

11 replied, “Is there even a balance to be found when it comes to this? Some middle ground? Or are we just lying to ourselves that we can logic our emotions into passive acceptance, when really the only option is embracing the illogical beauty of it all? I can’t speak for you, but I can tell you for me…for me, I hit this point where all I have is my heart to guide me, and I’ve hit that point with Bis2.  She is our gemling to me.  No matter what part of my head tells me I need to not allow that feeling.”

 

Doctor smiled, “You’re right,” she whispered, “you’re right.  I may have never actively let Bis2 call me Mom or think of myself as her mom, but…but I am.  I am, and I have been for a while now. Oh,” she chuckled, “now it seems so silly that we haven’t adopted her already.”

11 smiled, “How about at Celebration? We can surprise her? Make it special?”

 

Doctor nodded. "I like that idea. A Celebration to remember, hm?"

11 went to talk with her hands about how excited she was, but a sharp pain in her left shoulder followed by numbness in her forearm stopped her. 

 

Doctor, of course, immediately noticed and began scanning and treating 11's shoulder.  11 was getting far too used to these little surgeries.  Once Doc was at a point she was wrapping up and 11's arm felt better, although still weakened and more painful than before this flare up, 11 dared to ask. "So, how's it looking?"

 

Doc sighed. "Well…you know initially I thought it would be a handful of reforms before you lost function completely. The changes in the scans indicated as much between your reforms in The Jackknife and your two recent ones here, between that construction accident and then the training mishap with Justice. Now though. If it keeps this up you may lose function and be in agony again either this formation, or your next reform.  There just isn't enough continuity in your form's blueprint for me to work with. I'll try to figure out how to get you more use, though."

 

11 paused, another ache splintered from her shoulder up to her jaw and down her ribs. "What if…what if we just got rid of it?"

Doc shook her head, "It might help lessen the pain a bit this formation, but it will only guarantee next reform it will definitely be beyond repair and likely more painful."

"No I mean like, permanently get rid of it with the derezzer, and I'll get YT and crew to make me a prosthetic that can handle Shadow powers like the helmet they made me."

 

Doctor paused, and frowned, and then picked up her data pad and started pacing a little, “Hm, I suppose that could work.  I hadn’t considered it,” she started mumbling to herself, eventually she looked back and said clearly, “I’ll need some time to walk through the procedure and do some simulations, but I do think I can make that happen.  If you’re really sure you don’t want that arm anymore.  Once I do this, there will absolutely not be a way for me to get it back.”

11 nodded, “It hurts, all the time, and sometimes it’s awful to the point it’s distracting and irritating. As you know,” 11 blushed a little thinking of the few times she snapped at Doc over small things during her worst pain, “and now it’s unreliable, too.  Like what caused the construction accident where one moment it was a little stiff but not painful and working fine as I helped carry that support beam, then the next moment it just went completely limp and numb. It’s just causing me more grief to have than to just get rid of it.” 

 

Doctor nodded, “That makes sense. Hm, I wonder if maybe I could do something similar for Sickle.  Some sort of stabilizer for her hips and thighs or replacement I place inside, since her legs haven’t responded to the surgeries the way your shoulder has.”

11 smiled, “I’m sure she would appreciate that. You know how terribly she misses dancing.”

 

Excitement grabbed Doctor the next couple of weeks as she focused in on these new projects.  5-7 was over frequently as well, helping plan for both removing 11’s arm but also trying to figure something out to mitigate her own Moissanite scars. YT was excited about the new projects as well.  

 

Tank was very excited when Doc and 11 told her they would be becoming Bis2’s main mothers.  She was very understanding as to why they were hesitant, but also agreed they were making the right choice.  She liked the idea of waiting until Celebration.  She insisted the best time would be at the very end of the day. And to wait to make the pins because Bis2 would probably want to help with that.

11 and Doc thought a lot about what their pins would be.  It was a newer tradition established by YT to make these little pins for the mother’s and their daughter.  She made a trio of cogs with a spoke through it for herself, Jolt and Justice.  Something to represent them.  What symbol would work well for Doc, 11, and Bis2 though? They decided Tank was right and they should ask for Bis2’s opinion.  They had an idea, something based on what they all cherished between them: the sun.  It had been a longing for both 11 and Doc, and a joy they shared with Bis2 for the first time.  They just needed to know she felt the same.

 

Pearl 4 approached 11 the day before Celebration.  First, she invited 11 and Doc to the last orgy the pearls had planned before leaving to war, which 11 accepted for herself and promised to pass the invitation to Doctor.  These parties were strictly only for mother of pearls and only a handful were interested, but 11 and Doc always liked to go and enjoyed them.  They were very sexually compatible in most ways except that Doctor only had an interest in being more in charge, which was fine for 11 most of the time, but she also liked to be in charge sometimes as well.  11 had to wrestle a little with some jealousy at first, but they were able to talk through things and reassure each other.   

 

To 11’s surprise, Pearl 4 suddenly seemed very nervous as she brought out a data pad.  She had redone the Periculture Chronicles so it applied to all rebellion, and she had a plan to make more through the war and distribute it across space wherever they could patch into communications but still allow Gems that downloaded it anonymously.  11 couldn’t help but smile, remembering when she first met Pearl 4 heading up to Touch Desensitivity Training.  Before she had reformed with short jagged hair so it was no longer in the shape of her previous owner’s gem. She would never have been confident in herself to do this back then.  She had grown though, and working with 3-2 really helped her when it came to confidence in her writing.  

 

Everything was falling into place.

 

Pearl 4 sighed, “I wish 3-2 was still here, or 2-4.  To help me.  And 5-8. They would have wanted to be a part of this and contributed so much.”

11 nodded, “Yes.  They would have.  3-3 would have loved to join the fight too.  And to be amongst friendly quartzes again.”

 

Pearl 4 closed her eyes and then took a deep breath, “And that’s why I’ve finally chosen a name.”

11 raised an eyebrow, “Oh? To be called in tandem with Pearl 4?”

Pearl 4 shook her head no, “To solely be called.  From now on, my name is Ghostwriter. I pen my words for myself, for all those we lost, and for anyone who deserves it, and I always will,” then she smirked, “plus I think Ghost for short is badass.”

 

11 chuckled and agreed. Ghostwriter left beaming from ear-to-ear.  Again, 11 found herself thinking of the past.  Of those early days in The Jackknife.  The torment, the agony, the loneliness, the longing for the Crystal Gems. When everything was so raw and new.  She didn’t let herself dwell there long.  She was done with the past, and the future was a much pressing matter.

 

Celebration felt like it came faster than 11 was ready and they were all buzzing.  They feasted, they sang happy songs, like the song they created when they first left The Jackknife.  They danced, and laughed, and retold happy memories.  

 

Doctor whisked 11 away to a more private spot so they could make love and then rejoin the party after.  It was slow, Doc pressing 11 up against a stone wall while pressing herself against 11’s back and making 11 come undone with her hand, taking her time, being meticulous.  11, her legs shaking when she had enough, wrestled Doc to the ground and returned the favor with her mouth. They laid next to each other for a few minutes after, laughing, panting, enjoying the moment.  Enjoying the freedom.

 

Serenity washed over 11 as her and Doc kissed and then returned to the party, holding hands.  They sat near the fire they were using to cook in the center of town.  Sickle chatted with Doctor and 11 leaned back.  She closed her eyes and took in all the sounds around her.  The cracking of the fire, the excited chatting, upbeat music in the distance, gemlings squealing with delight as they ran around, her partner enjoying a conversation with her best friend.  It was perfect.  It was what would drive her through the hard times she knew would happen in the war. The goal to get back to.  True peace, and bliss, and joy.  Once the threats to their lives and freedom were eliminated, it would just be this.  What a wondrous day that would be.

 

11 opened her eyes when Doctor nudged her. She saw Bis2 approaching.  Bis2 had her hands behind her back as she walked up to where 11 and Doc sat and cleared her throat. “I have something I want to ask you two.”

11 and Doctor nodded.  

11 said, “Ask away, little one.”

 

Bis2 frowned as her voice cracked, but she gave a quick huff and then nodded to herself, “Doc, you are the first adult Gem who ever showed me any kindness.  Who really saw me at all.  You were always a source of radiant light in that nightmare of a place I cleaved and bursted into.  You took care of me, gave me amazing things to fuel my imagination, like the existence of suns, encouraged me to create, and protected me as much as you could, and you continue to do that here, in this wonderful place all of us have built together.  And 11, you literally ripped the door off my prison, told me the Gem I feared the most was gone, and asked me if I wanted to see the sun for the first time.”

 

Bis2 teared up a little, but also smiled, “I couldn’t think of anything more magical than that, and you did show me the sun, and you’ve shown me other distant suns and helped me continue to create here in our home.  I know you both have the war to focus on, and I have the other Jackknife gemlings that need me for a little while longer.  But I believe there will be a time the war is over, and they won’t need me as much anymore.  And I know I’m a pretty independent gemling, and it may not seem like I need...well I do, I mean, what I want to ask is, well,” she blushed as she moved her hands so they were outstretched in front of her, revealing two golden, metal pins shaped like suns, “will you two be my main mothers?”

 

“Yes, absolutely,” 11 responded without hesitation as tears started to fall.

“I would be absolutely beaming with pride to be one of your main mothers, to be your Mom,” Doc responded with a huge smile and tears in her eyes as well.

Bis2 let out a breath she was holding and started crying too, “Oh thank stars, I was worried for a moment you would say no and I’m not sure why, but you didn’t so that’s good.”

11 wiped away tears, “I said yes about three times in my head, I didn’t want to interrupt your speech.”

“Now get over here you,” Doc said and held out her hands. 

 

Bis2 ran over to 11 and Doc and the three hugged and laughed.  

Several pearls around them started cheering and one exclaimed in Nacreous, “Finally!”

Tank was grinning from ear to ear and looked quite pleased with herself. 11 asked in sign if Tank knew, and Tank nodded, puffing out her chest with pride. 11 chuckled.

 

Bis2 placed a pin on Doctor’s shirt, then onto 11’s.  After that she brought out a necklace with the same sun as a pendant, and Doc and 11 placed it over Bis2's head together.  11 couldn't stop herself from crying more happy tears, and they all hugged again.

 

The rest of Celebration was pure joy, causing an additional energy in their ending song.  They all formed a circle and different couples or pairs would go into the center and sing of their triumph before they’d return to the circle so they could all sing the chorus:

 

“Oh, oh, oh, oh ohhh now we’re finally free,

Ah, ah ah ah ahh, above death and sea,

 

Whoooooaaaah, now we're finally free, above death and sea.”

 

Doc swept 11 into her arms as they finished their turn, and they spun and laughed. They held each other close once 11’s feet were on the ground again.  11 lifted Bis2 onto her shoulders when it was time for the final chorus.  Then all of them, all the pearls, all the gemlings, reached up to embrace the sky as Sickle finished the song.

 

They whooped and hollered and laughed and then settled by the fire, the only source of light as the sun set. Then slowly they started to filter out, another Celebration at an end.  Even though it happened a while after Remembrance, it always felt like it was tied together.  Remembrance was the exhalation of the old, of everything they had endured and suffered. Of pain. Celebration was the inhalation of the new, of everything that was wonderful and promising. Of hope. A complete cycle.

Chapter 10: Rise of The New Order

11 sat at the head of the table in one of the smaller rooms in the community center.  They used this room for group meetings, socializing, and classes.  Today, it was their war room.  The room she’d tell the mothers following her into war her plan and iron out any details before they launched.

 

She was oddly not nervous.  Not about the war, at least.  She wasn’t excited, either.  At peace was a much better description. She had a clear goal, a mission, and an idea on how to accomplish it.

 

Once everyone had filtered in, she laid out the plan. They would start with Offcolors, and bismuths and quartzes that had been reset after rebelling.

“Obviously,” 11 said, “I want to focus on freeing pearls.  However, if we do that upfront we risk Homeworld connecting we are mother of pearls early, before we have allies and supplies to help us combat our gems with the modified nacre.”

 

Everyone nodded.

Usurper asked, “Do we all need masks then? So the mark on our gems isn’t visible?

11 shook her head, “No.  We have something else, although you are free to go for a mask if you want to.  I know this will cause mixed feelings, since some of you feel like hiding the dark grey nacre of our gem is as if we are ashamed, and some of you want nothing more than to make the mark go away, but, we do have a device. Jolt?”

 

Jolt explained the device she created with her daughter.  It would sit on the edge of their pearls, completely invisible, and emit a projection that covered the dark grey part. It only lasted six hours though. The device was too small to have instant solar synthesis for energy, but they hadn't been able to make it bigger without it being obvious or falling off. Upfront they'd all always use them when out on operations, but later, once they had more Gems and resources, they would get to choose to keep using it or not.

 

Once Jolt finished describing the device and answering questions, 11 returned them to the strategy.  They had managed to keep in touch with the bismuth that Sickle knew and rebelled, and she would be their first point of contact.  Sickle would work with her to reconnect with their other bismuth friends that had been a part of the uprising so long ago. After that, 11 would try to remind the former Crystal Gem quartzes who they were.  Their agate had again become complacent with watching them, so 11 was confident she could actually break them away.  She knew they ultimately thirsted for freedom.  And there was also that peridot that would be easy to remind who she truly was once the quartzes had their memories again, and she had connections with the underground of Offcolors across the Gem Empire.

 

And that was how the rebellion started. With Gems they knew had rebelled before and been reset, and with Offcolors.  Usurper quickly became an unwavering force.  She not only knew how to speak to an entire colony to get them to turn on Homeworld, but who to pick and how to structure power so a colony could govern itself and she could move on to the next planet.  

 

Sickle became 11’s irreplaceable second in command.  The bismuths that followed her without question collapsed Homeworld defenses like they were nothing but paper and she had a shrewd sense of strategy, plus she was able to keep calm under most pressure. Combined with her healing knowledge as well, rebels saw her as strict and maybe not the most emotionally available, but knew she cared deeply for them all and would lead them fairly.

 

Sickle’s recruited entourage of bismuths grew far beyond her old friends.  They single-handedly destroyed a multitude of structures.  They built it all, after all, asking the bismuths to destroy it was asking even less of their skills.  

 

More importantly though, bismuths saw the lie more, the way that everyone loved the things bismuth’s created but deemed bismuths to be insignificant, boasted the spires and coliseums as grand and genius, but called bismuths lackluster and dense.  How bismuths were seen by “higher” Gems as invisible, unworthy, low caste, while gorging themselves on the bismuths’ creations.  How they saw the work bismuth’s did, but not bismuth’s themselves.  Not unlike how Homeworld saw and did not see pearls.  It made pearls and bismuths consistently fast friends.

 

Doctor and Ghostwriter commanded supporting forces, medicine, morale, and supplies.  Jolt and Sparks with some hematites and an obsidian took over weapons, combing tech and classic weaponry to create deadly weapons for offense, as well as ironclad defensive tech.  Justice was a powerhouse of an assassin, able to infiltrate deep into enemy territory and bubble key command Gems before the rest of the rebels attacked, leaving Homeworld forces disjointed and in a panicked chaos without orders once The New Order struck.

 

4-1 took on the name Rascal, and she was an agent of chaos for the rebellion.  She had an uncanny ability to enter any battlefield and throw all of Homeworld’s strategies into chaos.  Partly because of her fighting skills, but also because of her unpredictable nature and how much fun she always had on and off the battlefield.  She was flexing her skills and enjoying the action rather than hyperfocused on victory.

 

Three of the mothers that came with Usurper’s group, Lucky, the sole survivor of Strand 9, Ace, formerly 7-10, and Mayday, formerly 8-6 all became top pilots, learning initially from 11, and then gaining their own styles from experience.  None of them had any desire to lead, but give them any sort of ship, space, air, land, or aquatic, and they knew what to do.  

 

Within five years the new rebellion captured twenty-three outer colonies.  They controlled everything, communications, travel, supplies.  They kept building from there.  More and more Gems supported them.  It was the most rapid pace for a change in Gem society ever seen.  

 

And just as 11 predicted, a name for them emerged, although it wasn’t one she imagined by any means.  The Era Three Homeworld slogan was “Their Order is Our Order” referring to the diamonds and the order they demanded.  They quickly countermanded this with the simple slogan, “Their Order is not Our Order.”  Then suddenly everyone was calling the rebellion The New Order.

 

11 wasn’t sure how she felt about this name at first.  She really didn’t have some sort of grand order to replace the Diamond order; she simply wanted to destroy the order already established.  She knew the old was wrong, but she had doubts as to if she knew exactly how to make the new world better, and if she should ultimately rule if they won.  

 

If she even wanted to rule if they won.  There was a time she would have jumped at the chance, even though she would have been filled with insecurities and overcompensating.  Honestly at that time she shouldn’t have been in charge yet anyway.  Now though, now all she wanted to do was be back in Haven with her family, and have the ability to visit Earth and reconnect with the rest of her family.  Now she just wanted a quiet life raising Bis2 and more daughters with Bismuth and Doctor, tinkering, making music, soaking in the baths, doing laundry, lounging at the river or the beach, strolling in nature on Haven or Earth, getting into mischief with Amethyst, maintaining the Temple with Garnet, reconnecting with Steven if he was still alive. 

 

There was so much support for the New Order.  Even if 11 didn’t know how to create the new rules, she at least knew exactly how the old ones must be destroyed.  That the only way forward and discover a new path, was to cut away the thorns of this old control, to discard the order and faux purpose the Diamonds promised.  She understood how Gem Society was comprised of cruelty and false promises of exaltation, and the pain and bitterness that stemmed from that.  And she knew how to channel those feelings.

 

So she did.

 

Over and over again. 

 

11 realized perhaps she did know a little more what the new world should look like than she gave herself credit initially.  Because she knew it would be some form of what The New Order was, figuring out the Gems that could lead, bringing out their potential, and allowing them to bring out everyone else’s potential.  Allowing Gems to grow in ways unexpected as they desired.  Knowing that sometimes these things were deliberate, slow, unintentional, fast, messy, or calculated, but always needing the space and understanding to let it happen.  A complex organism all of its own, made up of several different parts doing what they pleased and contributing to a beautifully varied and yet complete whole.  It wasn’t always perfect, it wasn’t always painless, but it was alive, and it was true. 

 

The New Order kept growing and pressing forwards.  They met all sorts of Gems that rebelled in all sorts of ways and for all sorts of reasons. Sickle led riot after riot with Justice using music and the bismuths deconstructing defenses, Usurper turned more and more colonies.  A quartz who joined them ended up becoming extremely valuable with some of the best tactical skills they’d ever seen, and 11 made her commander of the spacefleet so she could focus more on the ground troops.  

 

They crawled closer and closer to Homeworld.  As they hit more inner colonies, the resistance to their rebellion grew exponentially, but it couldn’t stop them.  Nothing could stop them.

 

Communications in any zone not controlled by The New Order remained heavily monitored and locked down by Homeworld.  Which made connecting with new colonies slow and difficult, and Earth still out of reach.  

 

11 and The New Order pressed on. 

 

And on.

 

And soon, The New Order not only far, far, surpassed what the Crystal Gems were, but the struggle transformed into a full-out civil war.  The clash of the old and new, the oppressors and the free.  The years passed and the war continued.

 

Doctor finished her idea for procedures to help several mothers with Jackknife scars, including Sickle’s legs.  She installed prosthetics within Sickle's thighs, and they granted almost full movement and strength for about seventy-six hours before they needed to recharge for about eight hours, although she could also charge them more frequently for less time.  

 

They had tried to have the devices power from Sickle’s energy like other prosthetics did, but since they had to be embedded quite deep within and a lack of energy flow was the entire cause of the issue, it hadn’t worked.  They also tried to make the devices solar-powered, but in ordered to make a collection unit big enough to power such a complex device, it was too restrictive or uncomfortable to have around Sickle’s thighs and the logistics of putting the panels elsewhere on her and running a cable to them had proven disastrous in battle multiple times. So Sickle chose this rechargeable battery accessible through a port option. 

 

Doc was ready to remove 11’s arm as well so 11 could replace it with the prosthetic YT had tirelessly worked on.  11 kept putting the procedure off.  She was simply too busy.  Then she was poofed on a mission right before they reached Homeworld.  11 was worried they would lose momentum and wanted to press forward, even with her left arm completely lacking function and extremely painful after her reformation.  Doctor and Sickle and everyone kept telling her it would be better if they took a few weeks to prepare anyways so now was the perfect time to return to Haven and get the procedure done.

 

11 was stubborn.

 

And stressed.

Then one night as 11 poured over all her reports, Sickle came into her room and slapped a packed bag and message from Doc she was excited 11 would be returning home.  Sickle and Jolt had broken into 11’s computer and sent a message saying she was returning to get her arm taken care of.

 

11 went to argue.

 

Sickle grabbed the front of 11’s shirt roughly and snarled in Nacreous, “Unless you prefer your tits out?”

 

11 growled at first and then laughed, remembering that time so long ago when Sickle had first said that to her.  When she was new to The Jackknife and so sure she needed to reject everyone else’s help, that she needed to be an island.

“I do not.” 11 responded in Nacreous and then sighed, “I’ve been difficult, haven’t I?”

 

Sickle shrugged and relaxed, “You have been you.  Now, go, Doctor and Bis2 are excited to see you and we need you at one hundred percent for our entry into Homeworld. It is time.  Get your surgery, enjoy time with your love and child, de-stress, then return to us fresh and ready to raise all Hell.”

11 hugged Sickle tightly for a long moment, letting them soak in the feeling of being close and connected, then stood and grabbed the pack bag, “Thank you, my dear friend. I will do as you say.”

 

So 11 piloted Uncharted, the name they had given Chrysoberyl’s old ship now that it belonged to them, and headed back home, back to Haven.  She let herself relax, to dream of home, to dream of Earth, and to dream of being back on Homeworld, this time with complete autonomy.  It had felt like a long thirty-two year war so far, and she hoped to end it sooner rather than later.

Chapter 11: Preparations

11 awoke in her bed she shared with Doctor in her apartment on Haven.  For the first time in her recent memory, she had almost no pain in her left shoulder.  It was amazing.

 

It was a little odd as she sat up though. She felt lighter and yet also almost like the arm was still there at the same time. She looked at the new shoulder and small, rounded portion of her upper arm Doctor had managed to reconstruct in the mirror. Unlike humans, their hardlight bodies healed so fast there was no swelling, barely any bruising, and just a small, thin incision along the scar on her shoulder, and a thicker scar that looked more like a fold in the middle at the end of what remained of her arm.  Even then, the shoulder incision would likely be gone within a few days once her Gem accepted the change in her form. Almost made it feel like it hadn’t even happened. It was surreal.

 

She wasn't exactly regretting the decision, the arm had given her nothing except agony recently, but she was still feeling a sense of missing something she wasn't anticipating.  Not exactly like she wasn't whole anymore, but there was a tangible absence, a part of her gone. Maybe that was the same thing.  She wasn’t sure. Logically, she could see how a part being missing and not being whole were the same, but emotionally it simply felt different.  

 

As she ran her fingers across her skin there, the feeling of absence but also something still being there seemed to lessen some, like touching it was recalibrating her perception of her form and how energy flowed.  She continued to massage it until the feeling went away, for good or temporarily, only time would tell.

 

Doctor was happy to see her on her feet and then frowned as she looked closer at 11.

"Are you okay, my love? You don’t look great."

11 managed a smile, "I'm still just exhausted.  I’d been going non-stop with the war after all.  I just also don't really want to sleep more right now."

 

Doc scanned her and examined the shoulder. She was pleased with how it was healing and stabilizing. She had wanted to reconstruct a little more of 11's arm than she did, preferably almost to the elbow, to make the final touches on the prosthetic easier. 11's form could only be changed so much before the previous damage started showing up. 

 

It was good though, enough was there to make it easier for them to shape a liner and sleeve and get the prosthetic to attach. The more complicated part was Doc found trying to install the port that allowed her form to sync up with the prosthetic at 11's residual limb kept being rejected or caused pain so she had to implant it in her collarbone.  

 

YT would need to make some adjustments that would take some time.  11 would need an additional piece that partially went over her shoulder and collar bone to go over the port that connected her prosthetic and form together, channeling the energy from her hardlight body into the arm so she could control the prosthetic in a somewhat similar way to a hardlight arm.  It would be stiffer certainly, but YT had really perfected her robotics so even that was less noticeable now.  11 wouldn't be able to feel sensations on the prosthetic, but she would be able to feel it in the more vague sense of movement through the channeled energy, since that energy was an extension of her actual form.

 

It was nice to be home while YT made all the final adjustments.  11 had forgotten how peaceful and safe Haven felt. The only place now she could truly relax.  The only place she knew she wouldn’t receive any orders. Of course it was wonderful to be with Doc and Bis2 as well. They went hiking, gathered things for Bis2’s current miniature project, sang and danced, whatever they wanted.  

 

Doc and 11 started a routine after Bis2 went to bed since she was staying with them while 11 was home. They'd soak for a good hour or so in the warm waters of the spa, holding each other close and chatting with any other pearls if they were there. It was good for 11’s physical recovery, but also for her soul to be connected again to so many pearls.  Then they'd go for a long walk, ending at The New Great Tree and sitting at one of the benches for a while before heading back to the apartment.

 

11 kept having that feeling creep back, the one of loss and also that her arm was still there.  She even experienced severe pain, although when Doctor scanned her there was no pain detected in the readout, nor any hardlight destabilization.  11 had heard of something like this from humans, phantom limb pain or nerve pain.  Gem bodies didn’t exactly have nerves in the organic sense, but their gems did still carry this blueprint of their forms, and even as that blueprint adapted, old blueprints still caused a chaos of sorts.  

 

Sometimes it made 11’s temper short, dealing with pain after finally getting relief, the memories of torture from White Moissanite always bubbling at the surface of her thoughts along with it.  She tried to not lash out but it was difficult.  Often she'd isolate herself instead, which only made it worse, Rage gnawing at her like a dog at a bone. 

 

Other times she would cry and couldn’t stop, Despair making her ooze and no one and nothing could console her.  Doc worried that it was regret.  11 assured her it wasn’t, not in the slightest.  She knew she’d made the right decision.  At the end of the day though, the loss of this arm stemmed from a deep wound, physically, mentally, and emotionally, and the surgery had brought all that up to the surface so it felt fresh and overwhelming again.  

 

Sometimes she obsessively cleaned, trying to distract herself.  Doc didn’t have the cleaning impulse like 11 did.  The apartment got quite dirty whenever 11 was away but Doc was in Haven for a while.  Doctor had done a decent job of cleaning up before 11 came home, but it wasn’t the deep clean 11 would have done.  So 11 did the deep clean.  And then meticulously maintained that level of cleanliness.

 

Other times 11 felt completely disconnected from herself.  Not shelled exactly, but like everything around her and within her was muted.  She thought of White Moissanite and her crew the most on those days.  She tried not to.  Tried to contain those memories into a box deep inside herself.  But the more she tried, the more numb she felt.

 

11 learned to adapt.  And she hoped the prosthetic would help more once it was complete.  She talked with the gemlings about some of the things she was experiencing and why she was opting to have a prosthetic. It was something new YT and Tank had started while 11 was gone. It helped the gemlings understand the mothers and the prosthetics better and allowed them to ask questions about their own forms. A handful of gemlings had stopped using their prosthetics and a few younger ones decided to never opt in. 

 

Many still chose them though and they gleefully offered 11 tips and what it was like to use a prosthetic, happy and proud they had their own knowledge to contribute. It did make 11 feel better. She hadn't really expected that. But talking with them made her realize she kept telling herself this had been the right choice and what she truly wanted so she wasn't allowed to have any mixed feelings, but that was unreasonable considering everything.

 

Ultimately, being back in Haven, with other disgraced mother of pearls, with the gemlings, it reminded 11 of everything they were all fighting for.  Not that she had forgotten exactly, but the war had taken its toll. As it does.  She had managed to not lose any of the mothers, although there were a few close calls and Sickle and Jolt were captured for a month once. 

 

That had been one of the worst feelings.  11 considered it one of her biggest failings as a leader.  Jolt and Sickle didn’t hold it against her.  They were ambushed, it was war.  11 still felt a stab of guilt especially when she remembered the faces Doctor and Justice had made when she told them. Thankfully the two were mostly just detained, except the last week they had started being tortured.  11 had managed to rescue them before any more permanent physical injuries happened, but it had certainly taken a toll on both of them mentally. 

 

And 11 had lost others. Shattered by Homeworld in battle or when a mission went wrong and led to rebels being captured.  In hindsight, for the amount of time and scale of the war against such a powerful enemy, it wasn't a bad number. It was still higher than she liked: seventy-four. 

 

Most of the rebels shattered were quartzes,they were often targeted more. Although there were a few bismuths and non-Jackknife pearls as well and a handful of other gem types. 11 mourned every single one. The loss of their lives were what she considered her absolute biggest failure.

 

The mothers in the war had all adapted Remembrance and Celebration for while they were away.  11 modeled a form of Remembrance for all of the rebels as a way to mourn those they lost or had not yet been able to free from Homeworld's grip.  It proved an important part for them all to bond.

 

11 realized now some form of Celebration was needed for everyone too.  It was important to focus on their losses, but it was important to focus on victories as well.  To breathe and remind themselves of everything that had been accomplished.  

 

They needed to bask in the pride of how many colonies were free now.  Peaceful, thriving, learning to live in their own ways.  There were many refugee planets for colonies still in contention that Gems were able to flee to if they did not want to fight. There were even more colonies actively in the fight.  There had never been a Gem movement on the scale of what they had accomplished, not even close.  

 

They could always find ways to start anew. They overcame every obstacle thrown at them so far.

 

None of it was without challenges.  There was a constant pressure to keep stealing supplies from Homeworld and maintain their space to provide safe passage and communication.  Innovation had birthed from this need though.  Ways to find their own resources without damaging a planet completely.  Different ways of doing things so the certain exclusively Homeworld resources just weren’t needed.

 

Some of these freed Gems had even started families.  The Message, which is what Ghostwriter called The New Order version of The Periculture Chronicles, had introduced the concept of marriage and family to Gems. And many adopted the ideas immediately, while others began making their own versions, much like the mothers of Haven had for raising gemlings.  So soon all types of families started forming and from that came different rituals, and dialects, and pastimes. New cultures were forming everywhere faster than any of them could keep up with.  

 

That all deserved to be celebrated.  To be remembered intentionally.  To be enjoyed.  To keep pressing forward until the Diamond Authority fell and everyone was free.

 

It took almost two months for YT to complete 11’s arm after some unexpected snags with 11’s Shadow powers.  11’s helmet relied more on suppression and was separate from 11’s form, but this arm had all of 11’s energy flowing through it, and 11 decided she wanted to be able to channel more Shadow energy than usual since it didn’t feel uncomfortable and wouldn't get damaged the way it sometimes did on her hardlight form.  It wasn’t easy, but YT managed. 

 

It took another month and a half for 11 to get used to the prosthetic.  As hoped she had fewer times she experienced the phantom limb pain and the feeling of absence. Although 11 found taking daily breaks would prevent discomfort the way YT did for her leg.

 

Since the prosthetic was quite complicated, it required a lot more maintenance than others. 

11 didn’t mind though.  Just having the option of the prosthetic helped her more than she had even hoped, and she liked the routine of the maintenance.  It hit that same impulse as her need to clean and tidy things. 

 

The break ended up being perfect in terms of the war as well.  Sickle had come across a wulfenite whose crew had been rogue and near Homeworld for centuries now.  The Diamonds had given the wulfenite an order that would have killed half her crew.  So she refused, deciding The Diamonds must not have understood the situation and retreated instead.  The Diamonds had sentenced her to be shattered.  Her crew broke her out of her holding cell and stole their ship. They had been on the run ever since.

 

So while 11 was in Haven, Sickle and Wulfenite had been carving a safe corridor through the inner colonies and straight to Homeworld.  They established supply lines and secure communications they had anticipated would take years to accomplish.  11, after conferring with her other commanders, made Wulfenite a commander and put her in charge of the spacefleet for the inner colonies.

 

Usurper was about wrapped up on a rebellion project for a very key inner colony that would be an ideal staging planet to assault Homeworld. 11 decided to wait to return until she was done.

 

So, after a little over five months, 11 once again loaded up onto Uncharted, this time with Doctor who would help establish medical supply lines, facilities, and train new recruits interested in healing at the new base.  11 had her prosthetic, two extra liners, a maintenance kit, and a repair kit with tools and parts YT determined would be most prone to damage and cause failure.   

 

They went to the planet Usurper had just freed.  The Gems there had decided to all evacuate and either join the fight or move to a very large and sparsely populated freed outer colony that had volunteered to take them in.  

 

The bismuths created a well-fortified headquarters.  11 helped with the construction and planning technology and security.  Doc established the medical ward and trained several new recruits.  Jolt added a bunch of new cloaking and monitoring tech. Justice went on several major supply runs with the pilot trio.  Ghost planned several special edition issues of The Message ahead to distribute at key points of infiltrating Homeworld. Usurper began freeing another key inner colony.

 

Then finally, they were ready.  It was time to return to Homeworld.  And they were going to make sure they would be very loud about it.

Chapter 12: The Nacre Spire

11 took in a deep breath and let it out slowly. Finally, a mission the mothers had been looking forward to since the very beginning of the rebellion, particularly in the past few years since they made it to Homeworld. They were raiding the Nacre Spire, the tower the honorable mother of pearls were kept in and Homeworld’s Grey Rooms and breeding operations took place. They would free as many pearls as they could, move any pearls that refused to join to safety, retrieve any geodes, send out a message through another temporary communications access point exposing the breeding program, and destroy the building.

 

Missions infiltrating, clearing out, and destroying buildings were commonplace for them now.  As normal, Sickle would lead the charge with the bismuths, exploiting structural weaknesses to break in and get the other teams in. A peridot on their team would break off with two of the bismuths and move all of the incubation equipment with the incubating geodes safely out and send them to Haven or other colonies. The rest would prepare and carry out the demolition. 

 

Jolt’s team would lead evacuation, first loading up any pearls or other Gems that wished to break away from Homeworld onto ships and get them away and to nearby bases where they would be interviewed and sorted based on their desires and needs. Then she would focus on getting the ones that were remaining loyal to Homeworld to a holding area in another sector until the operation was complete.   Homeworld could then pick them up from there.

 

Jolt was also in charge of final scans, looking for living walls, brushes, or any Gem like that, or Gem powered objects.  Nothing would be left.  Not that they anticipated any of those in the Nacre Spire.  Those types of Gems and objects were usually only found in the highest levels of the Diamond Courts, considered luxuries not fit for more than a select few.

 

11 would lead the team of fighters.  They knew from their reconnaissance missions and their own, albeit dated, experiences in the Grey Rooms there was very little security, although bolstered with the civil war, so 11 kept the team small.  It would be her, Rascal, with a benitoite on her shoulder to negate orders, a pair of quartzes, three rubies, and a muscovite.  11 would also use the interplanetary communications patch Jolt had set up to send out the message about the Pearl Breeding Program and about what the Nacre Spire truly had been for. 

 

11 and team along with Jolt and team were crouched in the tunnels below that ran all through Homeworld, long left from a bygone era that the Gem Empire had built upon.  They were waiting as everyone else made it into position.  Rascal, fidgeted as she always did, twirling her uneven pigtails and chewing on a gum replica 11 had made on Haven for baseball.

 

The rhodonite in charge of the extraction vessels sent two clicks to the comms in 11’s helmet, letting her know she was in place.  11 relayed this to Jolt with sign. The teams shifted.  Not quite stretching yet, but becoming slightly more lively.  Now they just needed signs from the back-up crew and Sickle.

 

Sickle was next to check in.  She actually called in, speaking in Nacreous, “At site, slight anomaly present, but low risk.”

11 frowned, “Tactical, or cosmetic?”

“Cosmetic. Very cosmetic.” Sickle replied.

 

11 relaxed.  This meant there was an unexpected visitor at the Nacre Spire, but it wasn’t a quartz troop or other warrior, but some sort of upper class Gem with no designed fighting abilities whatsoever.  Judging by the tone Sickle used when she said very cosmetic, 11 bet the Gem wasn’t even something like a sapphire that would have future vision or elemental abilities that would pose a challenge.

 

11 responded, “Waiting for one. Hold for go. Radio silence unless anomaly turns supernova.”

“Affirmative.” Sickle grunted.

11 signed to the teams Sickle was in place.  They started warming up now.

 

There was more waiting.  Finally, 11 received three clicks.  This was from the amber in charge of their back-up crew.  They didn’t expect any Homeworld forces to be able to react fast enough to the attack since this wasn’t a military or supply target, but they liked her forces on standby all the same.

 

With that, the mission was on.  11 sent out the message the mission was a go through the comms to Sickle, Rhodonite, and Amber.  She stood and said in person, “Move out, we’re on.”

Jolt nodded, “Their Order is not Our Order.”

The team all repeated the slogan, and they moved quietly and swiftly through the tunnels and up towards the surface.

 

It was silent for the first couple of minutes.  Nothing was alive down here, and the only ones who moved through the decaying bones of this lost era were the rebels and the occasional mini roaming eye looking for them.  As they got closer to the surface though, closer to the spire, they could hear the commotion.  It was mostly the bismuths talking to each other, but a little fighting still as well.

 

11 drew her swords as she broke into the light and saw the last few quartz guards the bismuths and Sickle were battling.  She charged them with her team and took them out within seconds.  11 didn’t see any Gems she wasn’t expecting, so she assumed Sickle had already handled the issue.  11’s team and Jolt’s team both entered the breach Sickle’s team had made and split off, focusing in on their missions.  Jolt and team would hit the Grey Rooms first, then move up to the mother of pearl floor. 

 

11’s team headed towards the single guard room on the mother of pearl floor, the small quartz half barracks with agate room, and then up to the command floor at the top of the spire where the onyx and nepheline usually remained. A very different structure than The Jackknife, with the Grey Rooms, visitor quarters, and incubation rooms at the bottom, while the mothers were kept above with the quartzes and the commander.

 

Also unlike The Jackknife, instead of an elevator that bottle necked them to a singular way to go up and down, the Nacre Spire had two wide, spiraling ramps delicately entwining inside the tower.  As anticipated, it was easy to take out the few guards in the halls on the way up.  There were only three quartzes in the guard station on the mother of pearl floor.  11 sheathed her swords and let her team handle the quartzes as she approached the honorable mother of pearls cowered behind who she was assuming was the Grand Mother.

 

11 slowly held out her hands to show they were empty, “We mean you no harm.  You have a choice.  Join us, and you will be free.  You will get to choose what you get to do with your bodies.  You will belong to no one, you can go wherever you like, be with whomever you want.  You can learn to fight, or you can go to one of our colonies to live in peace.  Or, if you would like to continue to live under Homeworld rule, we will move you elsewhere, for although we do not mean you harm, the Pearl Breeding program and this Spire is another story.”

 

11 ached to just remove her helmet.  To just show she was one of them, but it was far too risky.  She did always reveal to pearls who joined the New Order immediately rather than after a few years like other recruits.  A risk still, and she supposed a type of favoritism, but she could never help herself.  After so many thousands of years of isolation before connecting with other pearls at The Jackknife, now she found herself desperately reaching out to every pearl she could.  

 

They were too out in the open here, though.  She would have to wait until later.  Some of them may yet remain loyal to Homeworld.

 

The one 11 suspected was the Grand Mother frowned, but asked, “What type of breeding schedule would you demand of us?”

“None,” 11 assured, “I do not ask any pearl of the New Order to carry geodes for us, and the same goes for mother of pearls.”

 

“She’s telling the truth.” Rascal said as she approached, her hammer behind her back, “I’ve never been forced to breed at any point for the New Order.  In fact, haven’t carried a clutch in over a hundred years.”

There were whispers, they noticed the mark on Rascal’s gem, that she was a disgraced mother.

 

One pearl hissed, “Grand Mother, surely you aren’t entertaining this.  Entertaining… betraying Homeworld?”

The Grand Mother sighed, “For a very long time I would have never, but that was before we went from three hundred and fifty to only seventy-six in the span of a handful of years. Nepheline has never been a Gem I would call kind, but… none of us can ignore the nakedness of her cruelty now, nor the system that praised her for it.”

All the mothers faces went grim, and their eyes went to the ground.

 

Rascal and 11 gasped.

11 said without thinking, “The All Hands Event claimed that many of you?"

The Grand Mother frowned, “How do you know of The All Hands Event?”

 

Rascal answered, “There’s a handful of us disgraced mother of pearls in The New Order.  The All Hands Event claimed a lot of us too.  I can’t remember how many exactly we started with. Eighty-nine or ninety, I think? We ended with forty though.  Would have been a lot less without our healers.”

“Healers? Those who aid with laying geodes?” One of the mothers asked.

 

Rascal shook her head, “More than that, they help with injuries, complications through the entire gravid process, do everything to keep us alive as long as possible, keep our energy up, ask for more rations, develop ways to boost healing and energy lows.”

The Grand Mother fought tears, “Ah, we have no such skills amongst us. No doubt…well no matter, leader of The New Order, you absolutely swear that you won’t breed any of us to shards, ever , no matter how desperate your war gets?”

 

11 approached and knelt near the Grand Mother.  She lit her gem up just enough so the Grand Mother could see where it was under her helmet without revealing what type of Gem she was, then moved the Grand Mother’s hand onto her helmet over her gem.  11 removed the glove from her right hand and placed it on the Grand Mother’s pearl at her wrist, feeling the faint difference in nacre from the brighter pearlescent white and a milkier spot about where 11 had a grey spot on her gem, “I swear I will never breed any of you at all ever, no matter how desperate this war gets.” 

 

There was a silence. All of the mothers glanced at The Grand Mother as 11 stood again and replaced her glove.

“You don’t have to make your decision exactly at this moment,” 11 said, “but I’m afraid it does it have to be soon.  I will leave Rascal here for you to talk to.  Another disgraced mother, Jolt, will be up soon to evacuate you out of the Spire.  You may talk to her as well.  At that point, each one of you will choose where to evacuate to, either to a safe location back to Homeworld controlled territory, or to a New Order sorting hub, where you will get to make more decisions.  I know this is probably overwhelming, and yet uncertain. So ask your questions of Rascal and Jolt in this time that you have, get the answers to your doubt.  I will respect your choice.”

 

It was hard to walk away.  She wanted to stay.  To rip off her helmet and plea to all of them.  To reveal who she was.  To tell them they didn’t need to ever go through anything like The All Hands Event again.  Or to be raped again.  Or carry a clutch of geodes they didn’t want again.  Or do absolutely anything they didn’t want again.  And that she swore, ultimately, that was a good thing.  It was scary, after so many loyal years and having no other frame of how to live, but it was worth it.

 

Three hundred and fifty to seventy-six.  11 turned the number over in her head as she drew her swords again and continued up.  That meant they had to watch two hundred and seventy-four of their fellow pearls shatter.  Two hundred and seventy-four.  11 paused and let the weight of the number crush her for a moment. 

 

The quartzes, ruby fusion, and muscovite paused with her. Then one of the quartzes asked, “Er, boss?”

“Just one moment,” 11 said, “I need to grasp the full weight of the burden these mothers have been carrying, even if it’s just a glimpse.”

They all nodded, although 11 suspected they still didn’t fully understand. 

 

They continued without a word and charged the control room.  11 left the onyx to the quartzes and the ruby fusion.  Muscovite and 11 circled the Nepheline as she screeched at them about how dare they try taking her things and attacking her quartzes.

“Muscovite, fall back.” 11 spat.

Muscovite instantly did, helping dispatch onyx and then holding the others back, knowing exactly what 11’s tone meant.  

 

Rage bubbled to the surface. The helmet kept 11’s Shadow powers in check enough so that Rage’s chains didn’t manifest, but 11 could feel her very close.

“Tell me,” 11 could hear extra distortion from Rage on top of the modulation the helmet added to her voice, “when you just said your things, did you mean the mother of pearls?”

The Nepheline laughed, “Of course I did you half-lustered clod.  What else would I be talking about?  They are my pride and joy of the Nacre Spire.  The treasures I am to keep shiny and fit for use while under my watch.”

 

“Really? And is that what you were doing when two hundred and seventy-four mother of pearls shattered during The All Hands Event?” 11 struggled to keep her voice level.

Nepheline scoffed and rolled her eyes, “Is that what this is about? I’ll have you know my superiors marked my record with accolades for exemplary performance for that. I was expected to lose all but ten after all, so the fact that I kept almost eight times more than that was a great testament to my excellent care.”

 

11 had to take a few breaths and her jaw moved side-to-side before she said, “And do the mothers agree with that assessment?  Did they sing your praises as they watched more of their own crumble to shards before their very eyes?  Or were they wailing their sorrows and cursing your cruelty?”

 

Nepheline laughed, that haughty, almost closed-teeth laugh upper level Homeworld Gems so often had, “How should I know?  Am I supposed to be able to tell the differences between their songs or their wails?  They are but pearls, and I am a nepheline.  It is like asking me to make intelligible thoughts from the brutish grunts of rubies or quartzes, or to find wisdom in the musing of a muscovite.  Who cares?  Now,” She drew her whip and snapped it, “you will return my Gems, you will leave my Spire, and you will leave my things exactly where they are, and yes, by things I mean every single mother of pearl.”

 

11 didn’t say a word.  She channeled Shadow power into her prosthetic arm and through the blade.  The nepheline’s gem was at her right cheek, so 11 started with her legs.  With all that Shadow energy she easily cut through the limbs high at the thighs, causing the nepheline to start falling.  Before she hit the ground, 11 removed her arms as well.  After a moment of shock, the nepheline started to scream.

 

11 allowed her to briefly keep screaming, but then grabbed her mouth to muffle the sound and asked, “Tell me now, since you seem to have difficulty grasping the concept, were those sounds you just made a song, or wails?”

Then she severed the nepheline’s head, forcing her into her gem.  It was difficult to not feed on her energy with Rage so present and terror spewing off Nepheline so strongly right before she poofed.

 

11 refrained though, instead bubbling the gem and sending her away.

 

There was a silence.  It dawned on 11 suddenly that she had allowed herself to be vengeful in front of these Gems.  Allowed was perhaps not the correct word, more she hadn’t been able to control her rage after all the pain so similar to a place in her past. She knew these Gems well, but not super well. This was the first mission the rubies were on her team directly, previously they had been on missions with her but as a part of another leader’s team.  They were now unfused and were glancing at each other, nervous, uncertain.  11 at least had made sure everyone on this mission knew who she was, that they knew she was a disgraced mother of pearl.  She had suspected her emotions to run high, and she wanted them to understand that.

 

One of the quartzes broke the silence, “Well good riddance to that cunt.  She sounded like a real piece of work.  Kind of reminded me of one of the agates I had.  Meanest Gem I’ve ever known.  Got a bunch of us shattered on some unnecessarily flashy mission just to get a promotion.”

 

One of the rubies nodded, “Yeah, a corundum I had was like that too.”

Muscovite nodded, “A common occurrence sadly. It is one of the great flaws of The Diamonds’ supposed ‘perfect’ order, they reward extravagance and aggrandizing from a select few at the expense of the many, and they call it efficiency while completely ignoring the waste of potential all of us have and the impacts of such cruelty.”

 

One of the other rubies crossed her arms and pouted, “And you know what, that was incredibly wise Muscovite, and I understood every single word quite intelligibly, so that Nepheline can also take her judgment and shove it up her, her…”

“Ass crack?” The other quartz offered.

 

All the rubies snickered and Muscovite rolled her eyes but smirked.

“Yeah! Right up her ass crack!” The rubies cheered.

“All right, all right, let’s settle down,” 11 said, although she chuckled as well, her voice back to the normal modulation with Rage now contained deep within her again, “I admit I still let my emotions get the better of me, even if that Nepheline was a raging cunt with her nose up her ass crack.”

 

All the rubies started giggling again, and the quartzes smiled broadly.

11 continued, “It is difficult to not react sometimes.  But also good to not make a habit of it. Now, we still have a mission to complete.  I can handle the rest up here, go meet up with Jolt and see if she needs any help with evacuation.  If she doesn’t, then report to Sickle and see if she needs help with demolition or geode retrieval.”

They all nodded.

 

Muscovite lingered, “Boss, just so you know…I don’t think you necessarily did anything wrong.  I suppose there was a bit of an, well, let’s say an edge, to how you took out that Gem.  It was a very specific circumstance though.”

11 turned to the console and began patching into the communications weaknesses Jolt had identified weeks ago when they planned this mission, “I appreciate the sentiment.  I overall agree, although I also note that too many allowances and excuses of ‘very specific circumstances’ can quickly build to very unfortunate patterns.  Afterall, I could have just beheaded her to instantly take her out.  It would have been more efficient and caused her less pain.  Getting too much into causing pain is not a good path.”

 

Muscovite chuckled, “11, if I was worried about that with you, I would not be here.  But all the same, even if that starts to change, I know I have the voice to say something about it, and that is what makes us different from them .”

11 allowed Muscovite to leave without another word. She mulled this over as she worked.

 

11 admitted to herself she didn’t regret making the Nepheline suffer briefly before forcing her to retreat into her gem.  She had been a little overwhelmed by anger, but she also just couldn’t bring herself to feel bad, not with the way Nepheline was boasting.  She regretted doing it in front of Gems she was to be an example of though.  What did that say about her?

 

She shook her head and focused on her task.  

 

11 sent out all of the data about the Pearl Breeding Program and opened communications.  This particular breach only allowed for a broad signal stretching out across most of the Empire.  11 bet it could even reach Earth if there was any way for them to receive it.  Too bad she couldn’t piggyback a pinpointed message to them.  Not that they had a receiver she knew of any way.  

 

Soon.  She told herself.  They were working on creating secure communications out that way and were hopeful to establish it by the end of next year and see if Earth could become a refugee planet for a small group of Gems. She would finally get to see them all again. After so long.

 

Not now though.

 

Now she spat with a controlled anger against the atrocities of the Pearl Breeding Program, asserted how pearls were individuals, how what was being done here in this spire was wrong, calling it rape and sexual slavery specifically. She pointed out the hypocrisy of how frequently organic life that sexually reproduced was denounced as lesser than for that, yet here Gems were, sexually producing.  She highlighted how if the Diamonds were so certain the program was just and good, why was it kept relatively secret, and why were Gems that bursted from geodes given false memories of bursting from Kindergartens instead.  She concluded that this spire was nothing more but another construct of the Diamond’s long string of convenient lies to exert a control they had no right to, and so, like that control, she would destroy it.  Then she cut the feed.

 

11 placed charges Sickle had given her before they had split prior to the mission and was about to leave to see how everything else was progressing when a gray bubble dropped into the room.

11 drew her swords as the bubble disappeared and revealed Pink Pearl, completely monochrome and with a vacant stare and hollow smile.

 

White Diamond spoke through Pink Pearl, “Well, well, well, what do we have here?  Growing bolder and bolder aren’t you?  It will no doubt be your downfall.”

11 didn’t let her speak anymore.  Rage returned to the surface as she could see the strings of light White was using to puppet Pink Pearl, shifted just slightly out of this dimension, invisible to most Gems, but no longer invisible to 11 with her Shadow eye.  And 11 was done seeing pearls be used, she was done hearing about pearls being used, she was done.  

 

Without a second thought, 11 channeled Shadow energy to her left arm and blade again and severed those strings, cutting off White Diamond’s access to Pink Pearl.  11 staggered a little, the energy to achieve this more than she was anticipating.  Color returned to Pink Pearl and she collapsed to the ground, unconscious.

 

This would probably be suspicious to White Diamond, although 11 doubted she’d be able to piece together how the severance of control had been accomplished.  11 decided White could have her suspicion.  It was worth the price of Pink Pearl’s freedom.

 

11 sheathed her blade and scanned Pink Pearl with her helmet.  She was stable, energy wasn’t low, energy flow was fine, only a little pain reading at her damaged eye.  The lack of consciousness must simply be from being suddenly and violently untethered from White’s will after so long.  A slight Hunger pain told 11 the energy expenditure would require a meal later. 11 sighed and scooped Pink Pearl up, carrying her down the ramp to join the others.

Chapter 13: Completion

11 stretched as everyone left the meeting room after they had debriefed.  The mission had been a success.  The message was out, the Nacre Spire was destroyed, and there were zero casualties.  There were also plenty of pearls that decided to leave Homeworld behind.    

 

The unexpected visitor Sickle had come across was just a datolite, not at all a fighter.  Datolite’s Homeworld purpose was to help higher ranked Gems continue to advance and fulfill their purpose at a higher than average standard.  There were few of them and all of them were exclusively in high caste sectors since they were sought out solely by those seeking to make it into a Diamond’s court.  

 

The others were a little worried about White Diamond’s appearance, but 11 tried to assure them. She could only do so much though after White Diamond broadcasted a planet-wide message that the thefts of pearls across Homeworld, including the one she was “keeping in memory of Pink Diamond” would have dire consequences.  She sang a song with Blue and Yellow’s Pearl under her control as backup to “soothe and unify Gems that understood the true meaning of the universe in this trying time.” She smiled the entire time, especially when she promised to crush The New Order into dust to be used for tools to enhance the future generations of True and Pure Gems. 11 pretended to not worry too much, they knew they would get the attention of all Diamonds eventually. Reaching that point was still unsettling.

 

11 immediately headed to the pearl room in the holding center after the meeting. Thirty-three of the forty-pearls in the Grey Rooms had defected.  Plus, to 11’s surprise, every single mother of pearl had decided to come with them.  Doctor and Ghostwriter were currently tending to them all and 11 wanted to see how they were. She also wanted to reveal she was a mother of pearl herself as she always did with any new pearl recruit, and check to see if Pink Pearl had regained consciousness yet.

 

Doc and Ghost didn’t even notice 11 enter the room since they were so busy.  The Grand Mother greeted her, thanking her for the opportunity.  11 could see by how stiff her posture was and the trained pleasant smile that The Grand Mother still didn’t completely trust her yet.  11 didn’t blame her, not after everything.

 

“How is everyone?” 11 asked.

Doc startled a little but reported as she continued working, “Everyone’s energy is low, a lot of stress to their forms from so much ill-treatment or just normal gravid complications.  All of the pearls that are gravid absolutely need food, but honestly, even the ones not currently gravid could use a meal to give them a boost.  There are a slew of minor to medium injuries as well, plus two in critical condition, and we’re currently focused on that.”

11 nodded, “I’ll get Jolt and Justice to start a meal and bring in something immediately for the gravid mothers.”

 

The Grand Mother’s smile became more genuine. “Such amazing talent.  Being able to heal like this.  Thank you for taking care of us.”

Doctor nodded, “It is something that brings me great joy.  My team and I will happily train any of you how to heal if there is any desire to learn.”

The Grand Mother nodded, “I would like that, I’m sure a few others will too.  So, leader of the New Order, what is next? And what should we call you?”

 

11 replied, “Next you will all get to decide where you go from here.  If you want to stay and fight, or live peacefully at one of the colonies.  As for what to call me, I have a tradition.  As you can see, we keep my identity mostly secret.  Rebels of The New Order who have been with us for a while and pearls, however, get to know it.”

She removed her helmet, keeping her left eye closed.  She heard several small gasps.  The Grand Mother’s face betrayed her surprise and then her genuine smile returned, “You are a mother of pearl as well, of course.  No wonder there are so many of you, and you knew about the All Hands Event.”

 

“Wait,” one of the other mothers said, “Aren’t you The Renegade? I thought you had been shattered.”

11 explained and gave a brief summary, leaving out her hybridization.  That was a secret very few knew still.  The mothers intently listened.

 

“It is amazing you all managed to escape The Jackknife. We heard of the fall of your facility since you were our sister program, but very little details.”

11 nodded, “They didn’t really like us disgraced mothers interacting with all of you.”

The Grand Mother just said, “Yes, they wanted us to see you disgraced mothers as beneath us and inappropriate.  The only times we heard of you was to disparage you.  At the end of the day though, we are all mothers, how fancy and restrictive a facility we were in and the cruelty of the clientele seems to be the main differences from what I’ve heard.”

11 noticed a few of the mothers scoff and roll their eyes at this.  

 

11 sent a message to Jolt and Justice about bringing food, and then sat and continued talking to The Grand Mother as Doc moved on, tending to more of the mothers and other pearls.

“So,” 11 asked, “any ideas what you’ll want to do from here?”

The Grand Mother shook her head, “The only things we are certain of is that the others who were at the Spire are free to come with us if they’d like, and that we want to stay together.  I know you are offering everyone to have their own outcomes, but we are simply not at the point we are comfortable with that and cannot stand the thought of splitting up.  Especially not after all those we lost.  ”

 

11 nodded, “Of course.  Do whatever is best.  Know today’s decision doesn’t have to be permanent either.  Well, as long as we are at war you can’t return to Homeworld, but if down the line the group is more comfortable splitting up and some want to change their minds, they are free too.  Stay together as long as you need.”

“You make it sound so easy.” One of the other mothers said.

 

11 chuckled, “I assure you, I know it isn’t.  I’ve known many thousands of years of freedom, and making decisions, and I still sometimes find myself struggling with it.  It feels natural to do now, but that took a long time, and ultimately, making decisions will always be a complicated thing because it is for everyone, not just us pearls.”

 

One of the mothers that had scoffed earlier asked, “So, no returning to Homeworld though?  The only off limits decision? So we are forced to be loyal to you?”

11 shrugged, “As I said at the Spire, that was a decision for you to make then, and it has been made.  And yes, for now, changing your mind on that decision is in a sense off limits.  It is too risky for us to let you return and tell the location of this base and more about our operations.  War complicates things.  I am responsible for the safety of the Gems who follow me and the success of this rebellion, there are only so many risks I am willing to take.”

 

The Grand Mother nodded, “Of course.  I can see how one of us returning to Homeworld would be a great threat.”

The mother that spoke up sighed, “Yeah, yeah, I guess that does make sense.”

Another mother asked, “So what about the colony we’d go to if we choose that option?  What will it be like?”

 

11 explained to them there were actually three colonies they could potentially go to and how each had their own forms of government and attributes.  She would have Jolt bring a pad with all the information they had on these colonies for them to review and consider.   There were a few more questions to answer.

 

Eventually, Jolt came with the data pad and some tea, smoked fish, and salad, for the gravid pearls, then promised a hot meal of soup with more bread for everyone in about an hour.  The gravid mothers scarfed the food down, all of them complimenting the taste and texture.  One asked if they had any ration bars, she was one that craved them.  Jolt said she would see if she could track one down in their stolen supplies, and left.  Unfortunately, Homeworld wasn’t making many ration bars anymore and since the rebellion didn’t have a need with the supplementation of other food, it wasn’t their highest priority to steal.    

 

Sickle joined, bringing some instruments with her for the pearls to try out, and helped Ghost and Doc finish healing the injured.  Rascal and Lucky, another Jackknife pearl and sole survivor of Strand 9, joined just to hang out.  Later Jolt and Justice came in wheeling a large container of hot soup and bowls and spoons.  They gave soup to any pearl that wanted it, all of them deciding to try it.  Doc handed 11 a bowl after scanning her, the energy toll from freeing Pink Pearl demanding food to boost her levels. 

 

They remained there for the rest of the evening, all the Jackknife mothers in the area with all the Nacre Spire mothers and recently freed breeding pearls.  They exchanged experiences, encouragement, sang, dance, and even played some music.  It was incredible to feel so connected to so many pearls again.  A few mothers kept to themselves, The Grand Mother explaining they were the ones most hesitant to leave Homeworld and had always been more driven to fulfill their purpose, the All Hands Event being the only thing that shook that determination.  They had still decided to leave though.

 

The next week 11 spent as much time with all the pearls as she could.  It was relaxing to be able to drop her guard and feel the comradery.  Then the mother of pearls made their decision, they would go to a colony to live in peace.  Some of the other pearls from the Nacre Spire would go with them, they had bonded with the mothers.  The rest of the pearls wanted to go to Haven.  

 

The mothers group chose the second colony option, a colony that had named itself Conglomeratoria.  The colony had a looser overall government made up of representatives from different regions and groups that were allowed to mostly govern themselves.  Each group handled most of their needs locally, and the main point of the overall government was just to allow for an exchange of information and resources to make sure everyone had access to things they didn’t locally, as well as make planet-wide decisions such as allowing refugees in.

 

The representatives of Conglomeratoria had agreed the mothers would get to settle at a spot near the beach surrounded by grassy plains and, as usual, govern themselves and choose a representative for the main government.  The mothers group liked this, that they got to keep together and also not worry too much about being told what to do or be taken advantage of.  So they were sent with supplies to create their village. Jolt and a few bismuths would temporarily join them to help set up shelter, teach them some construction skills, and set up incubators.  

 

After talking with the Jackknife mothers, the Nacre Spire mothers and other gravid pearls decided to do the same thing for raising their geodes. There were several mothers who laid and did not want them near her at all and they chose to donate them.  All of the geodes from any other pearl bred at the Nacre Spire they couldn’t ask the pearl about because they were back with their owners were also donated. The demands for geodes were actually pretty high across the colonies.  There was a larger population than expected of non-pearl Gems that ended up having geode sacs even though they weren’t “supposed” to, and several Gems that were willingly becoming surrogates for couples, but there were still more families that wanted geodes and couldn’t.

 

11 gave the Grand Mother, who was now calling herself Matriarch after the others learned the word and started using it, a way to contact her, Doc, Usurper, and Sickle directly in case anyone from the colony started to not respect the mother's autonomy and especially if anyone tried to force breeding on them again.  She also welcomed them to visit Haven, even if they had chosen not to join Haven since the planet was so far out, they were certainly still allowed as guests.

 

To the pearls going to Haven, 11 gave them the manual for learning Nacreous and a general overview of the culture and living arrangements.  She had Ghost start working on an orientation manual to give to these pearls as soon as possible, and in case any more pearls chose Haven in the future.  She held a long session with any available Jackknife mother to answer all the pearls’ questions about Haven and their past right before they shipped out as well.

 

11 and The Jackknife mothers were sad to watch them all go, and they all hung out more together for a while as they felt that absence.  But they were also very proud of them for breaking away from Homeworld and happy they were choosing their own paths.  11 was relieved to know they were safe now too, not just from Homeworld, but from the war as well.  As much as she would have enjoyed having so many new pearls in the rebellion, she also had been nervous about losing them to the fighting.

 

Which left Pink Pearl.  She still hadn’t woken up.  This made 11 worried.  Doc assured her that her scans were still fine though, and she seemed to just be resting.  11 never saw any signs of grey on her either and thoroughly checked her soul and the surrounding dimensions to ensure White Diamond’s control had been completely cut off.

 

Then finally, she woke up.  She was very confused at first.  11 walked her through everything she missed and how she had a choice now.  Pink was quiet for a long time. 

 

Then she asked, “So she’s gone? Our Diamond? She just…no longer exists?”

11 nodded, “Yes.”

Pink Pearl smiled and closed her eye, but the smile was too wide, "So that's it, after everything, she's just gone and poof so are thousands of years for me. It's just a whole new world. And I was just replaced! And now that position doesn't even exist. Everything was for nothing and doesn't matter now."

 

11 frowned as the crack at Pink's eye grew.  She walked over and placed her hand on Pink's, "I know it's a lot."

Pink looked at her with tears in her eye, "She's just gone.  I don't know how everything ended. And you said she changed and I want to believe that.  I always saw good in her, especially compared to the other diamonds. She hurt others sometimes, destroyed things, but she didn't mean it. I mean, you know how she was, how her temper was, her scream that could crack walls and Gems too close."

 

11 sighed, "I don't really.  I only experienced it once.  The Gem I knew was always gentle, a healer, a keeper of many secrets, perhaps too many, and deeply conflicted and ashamed.  She still caused hurt, but she tried not to and often didn’t mean to.  And she certainly healed and rebuilt more than she hurt and destroyed."

 

Pink frowned, "I…I see.  Oh what am I all twisted up about?  Like we both said, she didn't mean it.  I just, I was too close that one time is all, and she didn't - couldn't control it."

11 squeezed Pink's shoulder. "Yes, but you were still hurt, badly hurt.  And she doesn't have ownership of that.  Feeling that pain, letting yourself acknowledge it, that doesn’t have to be an accusation or remonstrance.  Sometimes it just is."

 

Tears steadily fell down Pink's face and she sniffled, "I don't want to though," she sobbed, "I don't want to hurt.  I want it to stop. How did you stop hurting?"

11 hugged Pink tight, tears forming in her own eyes and a small smile on her face, "I didn't."

Pink started sobbing loudly and wrapped her arms tightly around 11 as well.

 

11 felt them start to fuse, as much as she could fuse now.  She hesitated, unsure what Pink would think, but Pink reached out, so desperately wanted that connection.  So 11 embraced it, let their thoughts and feelings meld.

 

They exchanged so much through their fusion. About Rose, who she was, and who she was as Pink Diamond as 11 knew her, and then as Pink Pearl knew her.  So many missing pieces coming together, forming a whole neither of them ever imagined.  The pain, the love, the friendship, the joy, the agony, the despair.  All of it. The beginning and the end, finally put together.

 

They were quiet for a long time, leaning into each other and holding hands as they exchanged so much of themselves through fusion.  Then finally Pink started to pull away, and 11 let her go.

 

Pink smiled and sighed, "Well, a lot has changed…and so much is gone, but, at least we have each other."

11 nodded, "Yes. And now we have a completed chapter of both of our lives.  For you to start anew, and for me, another moment of resolution."

Pink nodded.

 

Doctor came in, surprised but happy to see Pink awake.  She gave her a thorough scan and was very pleased.  Doctor kept looking at 11 too, sensing something had happened, but that it wasn't something to worry about.

 

"So," Doc asked as she put her scanner away, "any idea what you want to do next?"

11 offered, "You can stay and learn to fight, or be transferred to a New Order colony."

Pink bit her lip, "Can I, if it's allowed that is, can I live in Haven?  I know I'm not a mother of pearl but I think I'll feel most comfortable there.  I only know other pearls really. Mainly just Blue and Yellow, and they're still trapped on Homeworld, so, again, only if it's allowed."

 

11 smiled, "I'd like that. We actually just recently had some non-mother pearls join Haven too, so you won’t be the only one. I'll need to ask the other mothers to confirm, of course."

Pink nodded, "Of course."

Doc smiled as she looked at them both, "I doubt there will be an issue though.  There will be a lot for you to learn."

Pink Pearl sat up straighter and her smile brightened, "Yes, that's another reason I want to go.  Everywhere I guess will have a lot, but a whole pearl language and culture is very exciting to me!"

 

So 11 ran it by the other Jackknife mothers in the Order and back at home on Haven.  There was a little hesitancy from a few, since Pink had never even been part of the breeding program, but far more were excited to have her join them.  The move was approved.

 

Doctor would take her to Haven.  Since the inner Homeworld space foothold was now fully established, she'd return to Haven for some supplies, and then tour around the Outer colonies helping maintain and establish additional healing herbs and medicinal facilities. 11 and Pink fused once more before she left. Pink was much happier and felt she had direction now.  She was diving right into learning Nacreous, even.

 

11 and Doc said their goodbyes after that.  They weren't sure how long Doctor would be needed in the Outer colonies, but they knew it would likely be a while.  11 couldn't help but cry as the two left on Uncharted, a hole in her heart aching from the absence of her love and new friend.  Sickle was there for her.  Besides, she had plenty of work to keep herself occupied as well.

 

There was still The Diamond Authority to completely dismantle.

Notes:

I live! Sorry I dropped off the face of the planet, between getting sick and computer problems, posting wasn't exactly feasible. All sorted now though!

Chapter 14: The Return

Steven hummed to himself a little as he trimmed his beard.  In a few days they would be celebrating Garnet’s 400-year anniversary, and Steven wanted it to be big.  He remembered when Ruby and Sapphire finally got married.  After learning Pearl had been shattered, the wedding seemed off the table completely. 

 

Processing grief took time. 

 

Not that the two loved each other less, although they had briefly broken up a few years after The Incident, Ruby feeling like she didn’t know who she was as just Ruby, that she only knew herself with Sapphire or through Garnet.  After Ruby came back from some solo adventures and reunited with Sapphire, Garnet was stronger than ever.  

 

It wasn’t until Steven and Connie moved across the country and got married themselves years after that the idea returned to Garnet.  Steven had so much fun coming back to Beach City and planning everything.  He became ordained so he could officiate, planned the decorations, outfits, ceremony, and party.  Everything.

 

There had been a little sadness.  Sapphire and Ruby wished Pearl and other Crystal Gems who were gone or Corrupted could have attended.  There was always a little sadness in everything now.  It wasn’t something Steven had fully understood about his family when he was a kid.  He knew they all were grieving the loss of Rose, and it was a big thing, but it wasn’t until he lost Pearl he understood how it truly soaked into everything. Some areas of life were more heavily saturated, and others it was barely present, but grief was always there.

 

Steven forced himself to think of the anniversary and skipped up the stairs like he was a child again. On his way out he had to stop and look at the portrait of Connie and himself as kids, along with Amethyst, Garnet, and Pearl over the door that led outside.  Nowadays, that door was up a spiral tower that led to Obsidian's shoulders and two staircases outside, one to the laundry and second warp pad, and the other to the lighthouse.  

 

About two hundred years back, most of Beach City had submerged under the rising seas and damming of the coast to the north of them.  The beach around the Temple had started to submerge even before that.  The lighthouse was now an old building on a hill instead of a cliff.  The statue of Obsidian was half underwater. Her lower hands were submerged and holding this tower that kept the house and Temple safe and dry. Biz had connected the tower to the higher Obsidian hand holding the washer and dryer, so Greg could walk to it, and so they could still easily come and go by non-warp means or use both warps.

 

Sadness overwhelmed Steven the longer he stared at the portrait and thought of everything that had changed since they lost Pearl.  He remembered Connie passionately fighting for policies to change environmental regulation as more extreme weather pattern changes become more and more undeniable.  They hadn’t listened to her at first.  She had been a part of the international space program before, working on ways to get humans out in space and establishing a presence on other planets.  Opponents used this to discredit her at first, as if knowing about other planets somehow made her less knowledgeable about Earth.  

 

Then Connie died in a car accident.  It had been so sudden.  He was at home after a long day at the recording studio he ran with his dad and Sadie when he got the call. They were only in their thirties.  They hadn’t talked about death yet.  When they gave him some time alone in the morgue after he identified her body he started crying uncontrollably, and miraculously, his power to resurrect kicked in.  They hadn’t discussed if Connie wanted to be brought back like this, and it still changed their lives completely.  Ultimately, Steven was relieved to still have her in his life, and she was happy to still be alive.

 

It took them a few decades to adjust. Connie spent a lot more time with her parents at first, until eventually she and Steven moved in with them. Dying had made Connie realize how little time she had spent with her parents since she left for college at seventeen, and how fragile life really was.  It was like she wanted to make up for the decade she had missed.  

 

The Maheswarans never held it against her, they prided themselves that their daughter had such a prestigious career she was passionate about. They were getting older though, and they appreciated this closeness. Steven enjoyed it too. It almost made him feel like he had a taste of what being completely human would have been like.

 

Eventually things got worse and Connie tried to keep fighting in secret.  It was hard though. They realized some of the climate changes were from damage caused by Gems back in colony days, but they didn’t have the technology to fix it, Gem or human.  And then the worst started to happen and no longer did there need to be advocacy for environmental regulation.  Instead, the focus was scrambling to try and save as many people and as much of the way of life they knew as possible.  It was the most unified time in recorded human history, at least. 

 

The hardest thing personally was when they realized Connie could no longer get pregnant.  They had wanted a family together.  They couldn’t exactly legally adopt either since Connie was officially dead and Steven never even existed in the government’s systems.  They debated trying to adopt through illegal channels.  It made Steven realize he wasn’t sure he actually did want children in their life now.  There was always an inherent danger being half Gem brought, even when he wasn’t near the Temple or a Gem structure, Corruptions were still drawn to him. And there was always the possibility that the Diamonds would one day return. Plus now human life was uncertain and he just didn’t feel like he had the stability within himself or his life to be a parent.  Ultimately, Connie and Steven decided to focus on saving as much of the planet as they could.

 

Greg died in his sixties from a heart attack.  He wanted to be revived.  Steven had asked him specifically after what happened with Connie.  Steven had honestly feared Greg would want to remain dead, thinking if his time had come he needed to move on to what was next, like Connie’s parents had wanted.  To Steven’s relief, though, he wanted as much time with Steven as he could get.  And the resurrection did buy a lot more time.

 

Not infinity though.

 

Steven had always secretly hoped he was powerful enough to make them immortal in the way a Gem was.  Then Lion died and there was nothing Steven could do to revive him.  A few decades back Lars started slowing down the way Lion did before the end, and then he died a second time.  Which meant soon, Steven would lose Connie and his Dad.  His Dad was already showing signs of slowing, even though he had been revived after Connie.  Peridot theorized it was because Greg was older when he had been resurrected.

 

Steven started to glow pink as he remembered and kept staring at Pearl in the portrait, a huge smile on her face and her stance tall and proud.  It was too much, the threat of more permanent losses impending in his near future.  He blinked tears away and focused again on the anniversary, needing to distract himself. 

 

Steven slapped his cheeks gently, put on a smile, and walked outside. The top of the spiral connected with the lighthouse hill and that was where they would hold the anniversary. The wedding had happened on the beach, but with that underwater, they decided this was better.

 

Steven found everyone crowded around the receiver they had built from scraps from the crashed ship the Offcolors and Lars had returned in and human tech. Peridot had worked off and on creating it for centuries and finished it a few years back.  They still couldn't send messages to other Gems, but they could receive them.

 

They learned there was a civil war happening among Gems. A rebellion that made it all the way to Homeworld by a group called the New Order.  There were pearls in this rebellion. It hurt every time Steven saw one of the pearls. No matter how different they were, they always reminded him of Crystal Gem Pearl.  

 

One day they received a message of the rebels destroying a place called the Nacre Spire. They told of a pearl breeding program, how pearls of higher ranked Gems were raped by other Gems that were lied to and told it was a reward, a duty, a stress relief, or that pearls wanted it or were just fulfilling their purpose. That those pearls carried geodes, that Gems reproduced, sexually, like organics, and that these Gems had growth stages, gemlings, like organics had newborns, children, and adolescence. Those Gems’ memories were wiped of this early stage and programmed with a false memory of bursting and their gemetic makeup used as templates for the Injector program. To keep everything varied so Gems could continue to adapt.

 

That was a hard transmission for Steven to digest. He remembered feeling his entire body going numb watching it. Everyone was still and quiet after.  He finally asked the question. If that happened to Pearl. He had barely reacted at all when Bismuth confirmed yes, yes it had. He had more questions, like why Mom let that happen, but he never asked.  He didn't want to know, not really, because it didn't matter now. At least, that's what he kept telling himself.

 

Today they were picking up the visual of a message, but the audio kept cutting out, large sections were fine and then only a stream of disconnected words here and there.  It started with two pearls, one playing an instrument as the other sang, and a group of bismuths worked to dismantle the surrounding wall.  They were at the edge of Blue’s inner sector tearing a massive hole in her main defenses to lead a charge.

 

Homeworld quartzes disrupted the rebels ranks and reached the pearls.  The pearl singing pulled a sickle from her back and sliced the attacking quartzes arm, then kicked her away, orange blood now splattered on her face and weapon.  She didn’t stop singing.  She raised her bloodied sickle in the air as the chorus started.  She sang in a language none of the others knew, but a translation in Gem, which Steven learned once when he was bored, had been going at the bottom of the transmission.

 

Steven stared at the lines as the pearl shouted them and gulped.

“Your world throws mud on my face to stain me of my color and grace,

But instead I have cloaked myself with it,

Not wallowing but growing to burst from the ground once more.

 

Yes, I am an Offcolor, defective, improper,

I am covered in this mud,

And now it is my armor,

You cannot touch me.”

 

The leader appeared, dressed all in black with a cape and helmet that hid her identity. She gave a speech, but the signal was too garbled to really get much until the end, when clearly "Your order is not our order" came through. An explosion took place off-screen and the remains of a Diamond flag on fire floated in front of the leader and away right before the transmission cut off.

 

Bismuth whooped, "Look at that! These new rebels sure are something else! Showing those Upper Crusts exactly what's coming for them. Wish I could join them. I'd love to give the Diamonds a piece of my mind." 

Steven fidgeted as he saw the excitement on Bismuth's face. She always got fired up when they got anything about the rebellion.

 

It made Steven nervous.  He liked the idea of Gems being free of course, and he agreed the Diamonds shouldn't be in charge, but war scared him. If it came to Earth. If it pulled more of his loved ones away and shattered them.  He was a fighter in the sense that he could fight and would if needed, but at his core, he truly was not a Fighter.  Not like Bismuth.  Not like Pearl had been.

 

He didn't really like thinking about Homeworld at all either.  All his memories were wrapped up in the Trial.  Of Pearl falling from the palanquin and being crushed by Blue Diamond.  Of Lars dying. Of Pearl shattering. Of his world permanently turning upside down.

 

Steven redirected everyone. There were things to do. A big wedding anniversary just days away to finish putting together. Love to celebrate. Plenty of other days to dedicate to sorrow and war and fear, and complicated feelings about Rose left unpacked for far too long, the next few days could only be about love. About family. About what they still had together. 

 

And they did celebrate.

 

Ruby and Sapphire got back into their wedding outfits, Sapphire her tux and Ruby her dress.  They walked the aisle again, and renewed their vows. They kissed and fused into Garnet. Biz cried just as much as the first time. There wasn't anyone from town anymore so it was just the Gems, Connie, Steven, and Greg, but that just made them feel closer together.

 

They danced and laughed. Greg grilled hot dogs, much harder to find now, so only for special occasions. None of them needed to eat much anymore, not even Steven, he found once his body had stopped growing he only needed to eat once or twice a week.  They liked to though.  It made them feel more like what their normal was before, and that was important to them.  And of course, Amethyst still loved to eat. 

 

The afternoon passed, and evening blushed the sky pink and purple.

 

And then there was a deafening boom.

 

They had all been so distracted, none of them had heard their proximity sensors screaming at them.  They heard them now. Far too late as they looked up and saw Blue Diamond's and Yellow Diamond’s ships barreling right towards them.

Chapter 15: Homeworld Again

Connie looked again at the ship that was a pink pair of legs.  She still couldn't believe how everything had gone down these past few days.  Yellow and Blue Diamond had come for The Cluster, they wanted them as a weapon for the civil war.  But The Cluster fought the Diamonds, and badly damaged their ships.

 

There had been a brief fight between the Crystal Gems and the Diamonds too, Peridot and Lapis were poofed by Yellow, and Rose's sword destroyed when Connie attacked Blue Diamond with it.  But Steven unlocked a new ability as the Diamonds beat down on the advanced hexagonal shaped bubble he had.  Connie had been so alarmed when he suddenly passed out, worried he had overtaxed his energy.  But then they connected and realized it was some sort of astral projection like ability. Once a pink aura washed over them, the two diamonds recognized it and stopped their attack.

 

Connie wasn't sure how much the Diamonds actually believed Steven wasn't Rose, but they were calling him Steven at least. She also suspected they would try to get Steven to join the civil war on their side.  But they had almost successfully healed Corruption and promised to seek White Diamond to gain the final piece.  

 

So they would be Homeworld bound.  Greg was staying on Earth with Lapis and Peridot's gems.  Everyone else was going.  Another thing Connie found suspicious. Bismuth had always been adamant she'd never go back to Homeworld, but now she wanted to.  She said it was to support finding a cure for Corruption so she could get her friends back.  Connie suspected it was because she wanted to join The New Order.

 

She suspected it so much she pulled the blacksmith aside while everyone else was working on loading the ship, “Hey, I just wanted to check in real quick.”

“Sure,” Bismuth smiled, “That sword I made you good? I know you haven’t had a lot of time with it yet, but I still can make some adjustments before we go if you need. We can even have a quick spar to test it.”

Connie put her hand on the pommel of the sword Bismuth had quickly made so she wouldn’t have to be unarmed on Homeworld. “The sword you made is perfect Biz, there was something else I wanted to talk about.”

 

Bismuth raised an eyebrow, “Oh, sure, fire away Connie.”

Connie calmed herself with a breath, “Look, I know part of you still wants justice for Pearl, and you definitely want to join The New Order.”

Bismuth looked like she was about to try and deny this, so Connie held up her hand to stop her.

“Look, it’s fine. I’m not judging or telling you what to do. Just, please, remember Steven’s safety is on the line too.  I know Yellow and Blue are calling him Steven now, but I suspect they still mostly see him as Pink Diamond.  Which means they will expect him to act like a Diamond and hold him accountable for us.  So please, however you do what you’re planning, keep that in mind.  Try to make it so they sympathize rather than blame him.  They’re having Gems flock over to the New Order as well, after all.”

 

Bismuth paused and then nodded. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

Connie nodded, “One more thing,” she placed a hand on Bismuth’s forearm, “please be careful.  As careful as you can be in a war.  We’ve lost so much already, losing you too would be devastating. And I’d be out of sword fighting teachers.”

Bismuth smiled and put her hand on Connie’s shoulder, “I’d hardly say you’re still a student when it comes to sword fighting.  You were barely one when I took over for Pearl with your lessons. And don’t worry, I’ll do my best.  I’m a tough Gem, ya know.  And I’m not looking to get myself shattered, I’m looking to change things.  In order to do that, I’ve got to be around after all the fighting to forge the future into something new.”

“That’s good to hear.  And hey, guess I’ll finally get to go explore space a little in my lifetime now.”

Bismuth laughed, “Truly a day for dreams to come true!”

 

Connie felt a little lighter after that conversation.  But only a little.  There was still a pit in her stomach as they finished loading the ship and taking off.  The rough take-off did not help.  Steven was embarrassed at first, but Yellow and Blue both fondly reminisced, so apparently Rose had been no better at the process.

 

Despite her unease, Connie still convinced herself to rest on the long trip to Homeworld.  Yellow and Blue said with new Diamond ships like the arms they came in it would have only been half a day at maximum speed, but Pink’s ship had such an old engine it would take two full days, although that was still much faster than most modern ships given to lower ranked Gems or short-ranged vessels for resource efficiency.  Connie wanted to be ready when they landed, so she rested the second day.

 

There was a massive procession waiting for them.  Connie knew they hadn’t sent a message out beforehand, which meant there must have been some sort of scanner that detected their approach.  Connie wondered at what point they were detected.  Right when they left Earth? When they left the solar system? Entered Homeworld’s solar system? Would Steven’s mother have worried about that?  Would she have thought about leaving Earth at all?

 

Connie pushed all of these worries down.  They were here now, and it was obvious White had been expecting them on some level.  Blue Diamond’s Pearl was waiting for them at the dock where they landed and exited the Leg Ship.

The pearl curtsied and saluted, “My Diamond, I am overjoyed at your return, but I must inform you I am currently acting on behalf of White Diamond.  She has an announcement she will be giving through me.”

 

Blue Diamond frowned briefly but bowed her head slightly, “Of course, proceed Pearl.”

Connie glanced at Steven, and grabbed his hand.  He was looking at the ground as she expected.  He found it difficult to look at pearls.  He knew they were all individuals and none of them were exactly like Crystal Gem Pearl, the pearl who helped raise him, but there was still enough similarity it hurt him.  He carried a guilt and a grief about her death he had never been able to unpack.  She could never fully unpack her own feelings about losing Pearl either if she was being completely honest, so she understood on some level, but she also knew it was different for him.  

 

Once, after he had lost control of his powers and transformed, he had cried to her and told her how it was his fault, how if he hadn’t been so scared and if he had looked back to make sure she was securely on board before activating Blue’s Palanquin she’d still be alive.  She wouldn’t have fallen out and been crushed by Blue.  She would have been with him and Lars when they met the Offcolors and traveled back home through Lion.  Connie tried to comfort him, point out that if Homeworld hadn’t been so cruel she wouldn’t have been shattered at all, or that if Pearl had been allowed to freely speak the truth there would have never been a trial in the first place. It only helped so much.

 

Connie returned her attention to the blue pearl as an unsettling smile spread across her face and her color drained to grey.  She turned to the crowd of Gems below them, all organized by colors and forming a diamond.  Her voice boomed from her chest, except it was no longer her voice, but another.  One that was sweet and melodic and yet unnerving in a way that made Connie feel small.

 

She proclaimed the return of Pink Diamond and had Steven step forward and the crowd cheer for him.  She announced that this meant once again there would be unity on Homeworld. The Diamond Authority would be complete and more powerful than it had been in thousands of years, and it would make those loyal to the true order of things more prosperous than they had known for a long time.

 

Connie didn’t like it.  The words were very clearly chosen with a purpose in mind.  They had just landed, and already Steven was being used as a puppet to bolster the Diamond’s propaganda in the war and undermine the New Order.  He hadn’t even been able to say anything yet.  White Diamond, or at least who Connie was presuming to be White Diamond, was already putting words in his mouth.  There was a thunderous roar from all the Gems of “Their Order is Our Order,” and “To the Return of The Ultimate Diamond Authority!”

 

That pit in Connie’s stomach felt heavier and heavier, and her face felt numb as they chanted this over and over.

 

What had they gotten themselves into?

 

Then a giant grey bubble swallowed the pearl and Steven and floated away toward a giant white ship shaped like a torso and head.

“Steven!” All of them except the two Diamonds exclaimed.

Yellow sighed, “I guess White wanted to talk to her.  Makes sense, Pink Diamond has been gone for a long time.” 

 

Connie frowned, noticing the immediate change to calling Steven Pink Diamond again.

Blue smiled, “Come along, we can wait in my temporary throne room for now. Pearl will no doubt return to me once White has finished the meeting.  It’s much closer since, well, since it was just built, and smaller since they built it in a day, but adequate.”

Yellow’s lips pursed, “You mean since the rebels invaded your inner sector and posed a safety risk to your official throne room after I warned you about that weakness in your defenses?”

 

“Forgive the intrusion,” a new but somewhat familiar voice spoke, “White Diamond led a surprise raid with her forces very recently. Blue Diamond’s inner sector is once again secure and your throne room is safe.”

 

Connie turned and saw Yellow Diamond’s Pearl join them on the platform, saluting and bowing to her Diamond.

“Oh how wonderful!” Blue Diamond exclaimed. “Come then, we can all go to my spire and wait for news.”

Yellow Diamond’s eyes narrowed, “Yes, and we can learn more of this raid White led in our absence.”

 

They all followed the three Homeworld Gems to a sector of the planet that was overwhelmingly blue.  Part of it was in ruins, and the section of wall Connie recognized from the transmission of the New Order raid was patched with a pristine white material that practically sparkled.  Several of the buildings were completely leveled and there were deep diamond shaped grooves cut into the ground.  One section of the indentation was incomplete, rounded out like a shield had blocked the attack.  Blue Diamond made a comment about how White certainly hadn’t held back during the raid. Yellow said she was surprised she had even joined, noting this was the first time she had sent any troops or weapons for the war.

 

Connie took everything in.  She wondered if the New Order was watching them.  Surely they had seen the procession and heard the speech at their arrival.  It would have been difficult to miss after all.  Did they have enough people still inside to watch them now?  Would they be able to see they didn’t exactly side with Homeworld as White Diamond had made it seemed?  Maybe it was good Bismuth planned to join up.  She could help be a bridge between them.

 

The Diamonds left them in the antechamber and disappeared into Blue Diamond’s Throne room to discuss things privately.

The second the door was closed Bismuth said, “I don’t like this one damn bit.”

Amethyst nodded, “They’ve already split us up.”

“And you heard that speech Garnet,” Biz spat, “they’re already using him as some prop to strengthen their position against the new rebels.”

“And Yellow and Blue have both started calling him Pink again instead of Steven,” Connie added.

 

Garnet sighed and rubbed her temples, “I know, I know . I just… I can’t see how this is going to play out yet.  Except at this point, nothing good happens if we step out of line too soon.  For now, we have to play the part and wait for an opening.  It isn’t going to be fun, trust me, for any of us.”

 

After a while, Blue Diamond came out of the throne room with Blue Pearl.  They hadn’t seen the pearl return so she must have come from some other way.  Blue Diamond was excited and talking about a Grand Exhibition White Diamond had proposed to welcome Pink Diamond back.  Apparently this meant White, Yellow, and Blue would all send Gems to show off certain skills through events and then there would be a tournament at the end.  Steven had been given options to participate as well but chose to spectate instead and requested all of them in the observatory with the Diamonds.

 

“It’s a bit unusual,” Blue Diamond concluded and then chuckled, “but that’s our Pink for you.  Now, there are some rules.  First, the Amethyst, we can’t have you looking like that, broken and so clearly malformed size-wise, too.  Yellow Diamond has graciously lent her Pearl to lead you to be fitted for limb enhancers once she is done with a brief errand."

 

They all flinched at how casual her tone was as she said that.  Connie looked at Amethyst and saw the purple quartz flipping Blue Diamond off.  The gesture went unnoticed by Blue though.

 

"Now for the rest of you, Pink provided a list for the guests she would like. Although you’re going to have to help me since I’m a bit confused with these names. She does love her little nicknames.  I suppose there will be some things she will need from the ship to her room as well but of course her Pearl will be among those things so she can - oh right, her Pearl is… unavailable, I suppose you’ll have to do it Pearl.”

Blue Pearl saluted, “Of course, my Diamond.”

 

Everyone grimaced and Bismuth growled a little when Blue Diamond called Pearl a “thing” and said she was “unavailable.”

 

“Excellent.” Blue Diamond smiled, completely missing the reaction, “now, next is something called a, er, a Connie?”

Connie sighed and raised her hand, “That’s me.”

Blue snickered, “Ah, the pet. Unorthodox but not the first time Pink has brought a pet to a function, I suppose.”

Connie sighed again. A pet.  Great.  She was only married to the man and had been for hundreds of years now, but then again, they couldn’t even comprehend Steven wasn’t his mother.

 

Blue Diamond, “Right, so next the bismuth, which is probably the easiest one since there is an actual bismuth. Another unorthodox guest in the Observatory Tower, but simple enough even if she is a…gaudy example who seems to think she can dress like a pearl and not look anything except grotesque and ridiculous.”

 

Connie’s mouth went agape, quite done with all of them being so rudely dismissed.  She glanced back at Bismuth and saw the blacksmith blush and instinctively make herself smaller.  Connie stood between Bismuth and Blue Diamond, putting one hand on her hip another on the pommel of the sword Bismuth made her, while tapping her foot and saying tersely, “Are you done yet?”

 

Blue Diamond narrowed her eyes and pursed her lips, “Lastly, she listed a garnet, but I don’t see a garnet amongst you?”

“I’m Garnet.” Garnet said.

Blue Diamond snickered again, “ That calls herself a garnet? My, my, Pink really is outdoing herself this time.”

Everyone grimaced again. Garnet clenched her fists and then crossed her arms. Connie could hear Bismuth grinding her teeth.  Connie scoffed and rolled her eyes. "I said , are you done yet?"

 

Blue Diamond remained willfully oblivious, “I suppose that takes care of that, then.  Pearl, gather Pink’s things from her ship and drop them off at her tower with these Gems.  It will take a handful of days to prepare everything. Once the event is to begin, Pearl will return and lead Pink and,” she snickered, “I guess what we’re humoring as Pink’s court to the Observatory Tower for the Grand Exhibition.”

 

They were all in a sour mood as they waved goodbye to Amethyst and followed Blue Pearl back to the ship and then towards a pink tower closer to a white sector of the planet.  Their moods lifted considerably once they saw Steven and he introduced them to the Pebbles.  Connie was unsure about him wearing Pink Diamond’s outfit, thinking of how it would look like he supported the message White had just given.  Steven didn’t seem worried about it, though.  He said his main focus was still getting White to come back with them to help heal Corruption and maybe from there to convince them he could help broker a peace.

 

Connie kept feeling that pit in her stomach as the days passed.  Amethyst joined them not too long after with purple limb enhancers much like Peridot had when she first made it to Earth so long ago.  As the days passed, Steven left a few times to meet with Blue and Yellow Diamond.  He was the only one allowed to leave.  Everyone else was restless.

 

There was no sign of activity from the New Order.  At least not from what they could observe.  Yellow and Blue refused to speak of it with Steven outside of telling him the attack led by White had been very thorough.  There hadn’t been any signs of the leader since the attack, and it was known she was in the sector when White personally bore down on it with her own power.  There was speculation she may have been killed.

 

Connie didn’t like it.  Connie didn’t like any of it.  

 

Steven was outwardly optimistic as ever.  Connie could see him sliding into childhood bad habits, people pleasing to the point of shoving down things that were making him feel uncomfortable and like an imposter in his own body or just not enough.  The others noticed it, but he kept brushing it off, said he had it handled and it was just part of playing the part to get the Diamonds to come around and change their minds.  At first he would at least listen to Connie more, but then he started shutting her out as well.

 

Before it could come to any sort of conflict, the Grand Exhibition was upon them.  Steven was escorted away first. Then the rest of them were led by Blue Pearl into the Observatory Tower high above everyone else.  It reminded Connie a little of those fancy VIP rooms at a stadium for a sporting event.  None of the Diamonds were there yet, despite being led away first.  

 

Connie asked Blue Pearl, who at first had been hesitant to speak to her whenever she came to them in the pink tower, unsure if she would get her in trouble, but had come around.  Blue Pearl quietly explained there was a ritual to these kinds of things.  Any event a Diamond attended meant they were to be announced and officially presented so they could be venerated by the crowd before they took their places on their thrones.  She then had to excuse herself so she could go join her Diamond and announce her entrance.

 

Two guards entered from the elevator and stationed themselves at the wall near the thrones.  Connie shuffled to the front of the side of the pink throne so she could hear them whispering.

“...think we’ll see any action?”

“Why would we?”

“The New Order, why else? A spectacle like this? All the Diamonds here, even Pink , it’s the perfect target.”

“Pfft, after what White did to them? Nah, I bet they're still holed up somewhere in shock.  Heard their leader bit the dust in the attack, too.”

“That’s not what I heard. I heard they had some super secret shield and all got out.”

“Shut it.  That’s Offcolor propaganda, you’ll get us in deep ooze with that kind of talk.”

 

They stopped talking after that.  Connie shuffled back to the others leaning against the wall behind the thrones.

“Hear anything good?” Biz asked.

Connie shook her head no, “Just rumors and speculations about the New Order.”

Bismuth grunted.

 

As expected the Diamonds made an entrance with a great spectacle, Yellow and Blue were announced by their pearls.  Blue announced Steven as Pink Diamond who waved and looked uncomfortable despite his smile.  

 

Connie moved to the side of the pink throne again with Garnet and Amethyst once he sat down.  Bismuth decided to remain at the wall.  Steven blew Connie a kiss when he saw her.  

 

White Diamond took over Yellow Pearl briefly and announced she was too busy to attend the event in person, but she had sent her representatives and wished them all a splendid time for such a momentous occasion to mark the most unified the Diamond Authority has been this Era.

 

Then the Exhibition began.  Honestly, in a different circumstance Connie would have found it fascinating.  They started it with a build off, a collection of bismuths led by a Gem type she didn’t know making different yet similar structures depending on categories and then judged by another set of Gems she was unfamiliar with.  If Bismuth was closer, she would have asked more about it.  When she glanced back though Bismuth looked closed off, and even a little disgusted.  Her arms were crossed, her eyes on the ground, and her lip pulled into a slight snarl.  Maybe she had been forced to participate in something like this while on Homeworld and it brought up bad memories.  Maybe it was just being on Homeworld.

 

Next was a collection of peridots and more Gems Connie didn’t know showing off various Gems.  From what she gathered, they were all perfect specimens from different kindergartens across the colonies and were graded.  Like some weird combination of a fine jewel rating with a dog show.  That one made Connie feel uncomfortable, especially with how much pride the peridots and their commanders showed over these Gems being seen as “high grade” and “top of show”.

 

After, three teams of lapis lazulis competed to shape large sections of rocks warped into the arena into something “efficient.” They were allowed to sabotage each other, which was where each team’s ruby guard trio came into play.  It got pretty heated and the lower portions of the crowd were roaring and cheering, even when some of the water or flames spilled into the seats.

 

Yellow commented how easily common Gems were entertained when this happened. 

 

Once this was complete, there was an “entertainment intermission” while the arena was reset before the tournament.  This was a large group of pearls singing and dancing.  This one made Connie the most uncomfortable.  It became extremely clear how pearls were looked at during this.  It wasn’t even like people in awe watching athletes that are elite dancers performing their craft or listening to truly talented and well-disciplined singers.  The hordes of Gems looked at the pearls like they were fancy automatons flitting about the stage, or unattainable objects of desire and status to lust after.  But not as Gems.  Not as equals.  Not as anything with sentience.  Just as things.  Pretty, distracting things.  

 

The guards even commented under their breaths, loud enough for each other and Connie to hear but no one else, “Think that hottie on the left ever gets sent to the Gray Room?” Followed by what even she could tell was a Gem lewd gesture.  The other scoffed and muttered something about “What Gray Room, they got destroyed, remember?”

 

It made Connie rage inside.  All she could think of was Gems looking and thinking those things of the Pearl she knew.  Her first mentor who had meant so much to her.  Training with Pearl had given her so much confidence.  They had a rocky start, but as Pearl grew and understood herself, Connie grew to understand some of those same things in her own personality.  She got to grow with her mentor, and they were both stronger for it. And here were these Gems that would have just looked down on her.  Who would look at her and not even see her.

 

Rage frustratingly caused tears to sting Connie’s eyes, so she looked at the others and discreetly wiped them away.  Connie focused on Steven instead and saw how absolutely miserable he looked, trying to look anywhere except at the pearls and the crowd watching the performance.  Connie put a small smile on her face and gently tapped the throne to get Steven’s attention.  He looked at her and smiled back.  At least they had each other.  She always wanted that message to be sent to him in whatever way she could through all of this.  They had each other.

 

Steven glanced over at the Diamond’s and then quickly reached down and lifted Connie up and next to him on the giant throne.  Connie figured this probably wasn’t allowed but it wasn’t noticed.  The two suppressed giggles, feeling a lot like they were teens again breaking some silly rules.  They snuggled into each other and Connie pressed a kiss to Steven’s jaw.  Together, as they should be, like nothing else mattered. 

Chapter 16: The Strike

Bismuth had been tired of pretending by the time they had walked back to Pink Diamond’s room on the first day.  Now she had to watch this farce of a ceremony while Steven pretended to be Pink Diamond to schmooze with the other Diamonds in order to convince them to make White help heal Corruption.  When White very clearly did not care about them at all.  All she cared about was looking perfect and ending this war as fast as possible.

 

It made Bismuth feel sick to look like she was siding with Homeworld in any fashion.  To be in the same room with the callous shatterers and so-called leaders of Gemkind.  To play nice with the assholes that ripped so many of her friends and loved ones from her.  Bismuth squeezed herself as the image of Pearl being shattered flashed in her mind another agonizing time.  That image had been haunting her a lot since the Diamonds had landed on Earth.

 

Bismuth huffed and shifted her weight from one foot to another.  She hated all of this.  Being…civil with the Diamonds.  Pretending everything was all right. Watching events she used to participate in, used to watch and cheer for and not understand how fucked up it all was.  Watching and standing and doing nothing behind the thrones of the Diamond Observatory Tower.  It made her feel ridiculous. She got why they all had to pander to the Diamonds, she really did. But that did not mean she was going to fucking like it.

 

The crowd erupted with cheers and cries in unison. Programmed reaction, to a programmed event, with a programmed expectation.  Bismuth’s face twitched. Her finger that she'd been tapping her bicep with tapped faster.  At least it meant the fight was either over or almost over.  The last event was a tournament and this was the final fight.  There was another roar and round of applause. Announcements started. Over then.  Finally. 

 

Bismuth let herself zone out, there was always a lot of pomp after the fighting ended in a tournament.  Lots of venerating the Diamonds and all their “brilliant, radiant glory” and all that crap. Nothing important.

 

Except there was something unexpected. Gasps, shouting, movement.  Bismuth couldn’t quite make out what was happening below. She pushed off from the wall to move forward. 

 

Then Bismuth found herself kneeling and unable to stand.  Something was pulling her down.  She looked around and saw everyone else was the same.  Garnet and Amethyst on the floor close to the throne, Steven and Connie stuck to Pink’s throne, and Yellow and Blue in their thrones as well. They weren’t in pain or being crushed, but they also just couldn’t move.

 

“What is this?” Steven asked.

 

And then a new voice rang loud and clear across the entire stadium speaker system.  Bismuth recognized it instantly by the heavy accent.  It was one of the rogue pearls, the one that would lead riots and protests through song with a fellow pearl.

 

“You bask in your decadence while the universe around us suffers, while the Gems you’ve unfairly deemed as less than trudge through mud and magma for nothing but your frivolity.  You genocide all life you cannot comprehend and terrorize the very existence that makes you be. You call it your order. We say, your order is not our order.”

 

A song started, the other pearl playing on the synthesizer patched into the intercoms.  The pearl that spoke began to sing, breathy, and quiet, ominous even.  It was in the language none of them knew. The lyrics appeared in Gem all around them though.  

 

“I have removed your poison from my eyes,

It pours from my hands and slithers through my fingers,

It seeps into the ground wherever I walk,

Wherever I breathe

Wherever I shout

 

So I sing to you

And shout at you

So it can infect you too

Infect you too

 

It writhes and evolves

It creeps in your halls

Soaks your sacred rooms

It twists and turns into a new sort of fume

A fuel to spark, a fuel that seeps

Now let it all burn,

Let it all burn”

 

She began shouting the lyrics now :

 

“I have removed your poison from my eyes,

And sent it back as incendiary fumes,

To make you burn,

Make you burn!”

 

There was the sound of fighting and screaming and fleeing.

 

And yet none of them in the Observatory Tower could move . Not in any meaningful way.  How was it possible?

 

The song continued, but Bismuth was no longer paying attention to it, instead trying to focus on what exactly was keeping her in place.  Some sort of magnetic field? But that wouldn’t impact the others. An electrical current? Again though, that wouldn’t impact all of them. What was it?

 

Suddenly the leader of the rebellion appeared on the balcony ledge, her helmet reflected the light for a moment, her cape billowed around her. Bismuth inwardly mused how she supposed that answered the rumors about whether White’s attacks had shattered her or not.  There was a flash of blades and the two guards were dispatched.  The leader caught their gems on her swords and grey bubbles appeared around them. Then with another swipe the bubbles disappeared, and the leader stashed her swords.

 

The song was starting to swell again.  The lyrics again being shouted.

“I have removed your poison from my eyes,

I threw it back at you as cinders and fuel, 

Now let it all burn,

Let it all burn!”

 

The leader brought out a small box that fit in her palm with a button she pressed as she spoke with the lyrics in Common, “Let it all burn.”

There were two massive explosions in the distance. 

 

“No!” Yellow Diamond shouted.

Blue Diamond gasped.

Yellow's sauna and Blue’s pool came raining down from their lofty platforms, a hardlight screen catching the falling debris so it wouldn’t crush the city below as the rubble smoked and burned.

 

The leader stood tall. “We have warned you your tyranny will no longer be tolerated.  No longer will we suffer and shatter for your petty whims. Yet here you are, throwing a Grand Exhibition, celebrating your 'mighty authority.'  Well, that is what we think of your authority, of your order.  For your order is not our order. And you,” she pointed to Steven, “They just let anyone call himself Pink Diamond these days, I see, hm?”

 

“Huh?” Steven reacted, still struggling to move.

 

Yellow and Blue Diamond began berating the leader, but she ignored them, hopping down from the ledge of the balcony and walking behind Yellow Diamond’s throne.  She opened a massive panel and revealed a terminal and began typing away.

 

Bismuth studied her.  Physically, she was a lot smaller than Bismuth expected, but the way she carried herself and the pressure she exerted was much larger.  Bismuth studied the two swords at her side.  They were definitely physical weapons and not Gem ones.  Bismuth suspected that the second she heard the sound when they were sheathed, but she was certain as she saw how they were attached and held to the leader’s form. Gem swords with sheaths made from hardlight hoovered near a Gem’s form, ignoring gravity in some way, but these hung and swayed from clasps and buckles.

 

Several ropes came down from the level above, hanging near the ledge of the balcony.  The leader pressed something on her helmet and held it there for a few moments. Then she got back to work. 

 

Ten quartzes, a ruby, a yellow topaz fusion, and a Fire Agate jumped into the room from the rope.  They circled the leader, weapons drawn.

“Hands up!” The Agate yelled, although her voice wavered, “We have you surrounded.”

 

The leader didn’t move.

 

There was a brief tension, broken by the ding of the elevator.

 

“Those are our reinforcements,” The agate continued, “you can’t run.”

“Are they your reinforcements?” The leader asked.

 

The elevator doors opened and a cheery voice yelled, “Surprise!” 

 

A metal canister clanked to the ground near the Homeworld Gems’ feet and pink and green smoke quickly billowed around them.

 

Then the same voice yelled, “Batter up!”

 

Bismuth saw a sphere come zooming out of the elevator.  When the sphere hit the topaz it exploded, poofing and bubbling the topaz and two quartzes next to her, and blowing away a lot of the smoke.  A pearl with a giant hammer cartwheeled out of the elevator, gleefully laughing as she smashed the ruby instantly into a puff of clouds. 

 

Another pearl who had entered the room through the smoke and placed herself strategically behind the Homeworld fighters threw several knives from some sort of devices on her forearms, taking out three more quartzes.  Once she was out of knives, she pressed a button and the knives started recalling to another device on her back.  She drew a rapier and engaged a quartz lunging at her.

 

There was chaos then.  None of them originally in the room were able to move yet.  Still held in place by some invisible force.  Watching as everything unfolded.  Gems were bubbled, more Gems fell. The pearls were easily dispatching them.  They were playing with them, really. Especially the pearl with the hammer.  She was twirling and zipping around on roller skates, gleefully laughing and chatting the entire time as she completely crushed any Homeworld Gem that got in her path. 

 

The other pearl swapped places with the leader, and the leader drew her swords.

 

“Heya Boss,” the pearl with the hammer greeted the leader, “they were faster on that response than we expected, huh?”

The leader replied, “Yes, within parameters though.  Any trouble with the guards on the ground floor?”

“Nope, not even a little.  It was almost boring really.”

The leader grunted, “Boring is good sometimes.”

 

“Well, then we can’t have that, can we?” A new voice said.

 

An alamadine and andradite dropped into the room from the ropes.

The pearl with the hammer squealed, “Ooooooo, garnets, now we’re getting interesting.  Team up Boss?”

The leader nodded.  The gem on the pearl's forehead glowed and for a moment Bismuth thought they would fuse, but they remained separated.  Except then they moved in unison.  It was amazing, more like they were dancing with acrobatics and props rather than fighting with blades and a hammer.  

 

Bismuth noted the hammer wasn’t a gem weapon either.  The thud as it made contact with things and the way the pearl carried it was absolutely something solid in an organic and metallic way rather than hardlight. The pearl was an amazing fighter, too.  Smart, agile, and with this barely contained chaos she channeled into devastating attacks.

 

It took a handful of minutes and the two rebels took a few blows, but with a spinning attack by the pearl with a hammer and a well placed strike from the leader, the two garnets fell and were bubbled away.  It was amazing.  Bismuth had half a mind to join up right then and there.  They were everything she wanted to be.  Free, fighting, spitting in the Diamond’s face and dismantling the whole corrupt system.

 

“How much longer?” The leader asked.

“Not sure, I’ve run into an unexpected security program.  Once I’m past that though, a matter of moments.” The pearl at the terminal replied.

 

The leader walked over and looked at the terminal as well.  The two began whispering in that language the singer used. Then suddenly the leader tossed the pearl across the room and jumped back.  A burst of electricity concentrated into a single bolt shot from the terminal.  The leader caught it with her left hand and with a grunt redirected it harmlessly to an empty part of the stadium.  

 

The blast had pushed the leader back a little, so now she was inches away from Bismuth.  Bismuth frowned a little as she saw the leader lower her left arm.  Her clothes on that arm were now tattered and smoking. A piece fell to the ground and didn’t return to unbound light.  A spark caught Bismuth’s attention, she looked back at the leader's arm and saw that it wasn’t hardlight either.  It also wasn’t like any gem designed prosthetic she’d seen. 

 

Then Bismuth glanced up and saw the mask part of the leader’s helmet directly pointed at her, staring at Bismuth as she stared at her.  The leader covered her left arm with her cape and walked back to the terminal.  The pearl returned, unscathed from being tossed to safety and the blast.  A few more moments working, and then some sort of large machinery powered down, audibly becoming silent.

“Done!” The pearl beamed.

 

“Well done Jolt,” The leader said and pressed and held a button on her helmet again.  The pearl with the hammer who had been busy yanking the ropes from above away and stopping new ones that were thrown briefly skated over to Bismuth, looked her over, winked, and said, “Yeah, you are definitely a cutie.”

 

Bismuth felt her entire face flush instantly, completely taken by surprise.

The leader sighed, “Come on Rascal, leave her be.”

The pearl called Rascal winked again, “Catch you later, doll.”

Bismuth felt her face grow impossibly hotter.

 

The two pearls dashed to the ledge and leapt off the balcony. The leader jumped on the ledge and faced the Diamonds again, still hiding her left arm.  She curtsied and said, “That will be all,” and then jumped backwards off the ledge. 

 

A moment later an aircraft rose up with all the rebels onboard including the musicians.  As it flew away, it revealed it was hauling some massive piece of tech they had just stolen.  Yellow Diamond screamed after them for it.  Saying how one day she’d get them and make them pay.  The rebels disappeared, successfully escaping without any Homeworld forces getting anywhere near them. Smoke still billowed from the ruined bathhouse and pool, and there were still the sounds of chaos below.  

 

Then suddenly they could all move again.

  

There was a lot more chaos.  Bismuth mostly ignored the Diamonds, her own thoughts turning.  These new rebels were so impressive.  Bold, brilliant, capable. She'd been itching to join them the second they landed, and now it was all she could think of.  Not that she didn’t have any faith in Steven and diplomacy.  She just wasn’t sure how far diplomacy would really get them, or how fast, and for so many lower caste Gems, taking their time was not an option.  

 

Bismuth kept in mind what Connie had said, about being strategic about how she left Steven and joined up.  She hadn’t exactly been sure how to do that, but maybe this was it.  After that display, wouldn’t it make sense for Bismuth to switch sides?  She was a Crystal Gem, so seeing rebels up close like that rekindling her thirst for rebellion would make sense to a Diamond, right?  Listen to her, trying to think like a Diamond.  No, she was done with that.  Now all she needed was a way to contact The New Order.

 

They ended up in Yellow Diamond’s throne room. Yellow made a few calls, trying to see how the rebels accomplished everything, then checking in on the status of a few things.

Yellow slammed her fist on the console, “They completely made a fool of us.  They infiltrated the system and had the scanners lock onto us to follow us no matter where in the room we were and then change the gravity specifically around each of us. They even tailored it to our different strength levels. And they blew right past security to get the global transmitter core. Now we don’t have planet wide communications and won’t for a while.”

“So those new rebels, who are they?” Steven asked, not for the first time in these past days on Homeworld.

 

Yellow sighed and brought up some images, “They call themselves The New Order.  At first they were just a small group making some noise far in our outer colonies.  Rapidly though, they grew in numbers.  They started taking control of colonies, disrupting our supply lines, stealing supplies for themselves, sabotaging our communication and establishing their own communications. They have been gaining more and more, and about three years ago, they finally made it here to Homeworld.”

 

Yellow brought up pictures of two pearls, a quartz, and a wulfenite. “These are the commanders.”

Bismuth recognized one of the pearls as the one who had been singing.

Yellow walked through them, “This pearl is known as Sickle, she was sentenced to punishment a long time ago after attacking her owner while attempting to flee with a bismuth and spurring a brief bismuth uprising.  She has since reconnected with many of those bismuths and is causing havoc to structural defenses with them. She also rallies support and pushes The New Order’s messages with song, as you saw today.”

 

“This other pearl is known as Usurper. She somewhat recently started a pearl uprising and even took control of a planet for a while.  She has been the one radicalizing other colonies and taking over.  She helps the rebelled colony break away, sets up a new power structure, and then moves on to the next planet.”

 

“The quartz was rather insignificant before, but now commands The New Order’s spacefleet in the outer colonies.  Her tactics are precise and devastating, yet cause very few casualties.

 

“The wulfenite previously disobeyed orders, saying it was to protect her crew and then fleeing when she was ordered to be shattered.  She commands The New Order’s spacefleet for the inner colonies.  She seems to know every hiding space around us and we suspect must have an informant since she strikes even our most secret of supply transports, as well as moves rebel troops and supplies with impunity. ”

 

“And then there is their leader,” Yellow spat and changed the images to various images of the helmeted and cloaked figure, “very little is known about her.  We are not even sure what type of Gem she is since she keeps herself covered head-to-toe and modulates her voice.  We speculated at first she must be another defective pearl due to her build, and how many defective pearls are a part of The New Order.  Until this happened.”

 

Yellow Diamond played a clip, the leader was with the pearl that had helped navigate the system in the heist they’d just seen, and the pearl that had been playing an instrument at the Stadium.  A trap was closing on the three, except then the leader punched right through it and they escaped.

 

“That trap was designed to be twenty-six times stronger than the strongest pearl can achieve.  Meaning it is impossible for her to be a pearl.  We speculate based on this strength and her build that she must be a chrysoberyl.   Her ability to absorb and deflect electricity today solidifies this theory.”

 

“What do they want?” Steven asked.

Yellow was exasperated, “What do you mean? Who cares, they are trying to destroy our society, our order, our way of life, so they must be stopped.”

 

Yellow Pearl suddenly came in, "Forgive the intrusion, my radiant and ever-luminescent Diamond, but I have been issued emergency orders from White Diamond. In lieu of the attack at the Grand Exhibition, the Gems that came from Earth with Pink Diamond will return to her ship and be held under guard." She stood next to Steven, "And Pink Diamond is to be sent to her room at once."

 

An opaque gray sphere surrounded just Steven and he floated away.

 

Yellow Diamond sighed, "Very well, return to me once you have finished carrying out White's orders Pearl."

"Of course, my Diamond," Yellow Pearl responded.

 

There was another moment of chaos as they all tried to ask why they were being separated from Steven and what was the meaning of this, but it ended abruptly as a bubble surrounded all of them with Yellow Pearl and floated away.  When the bubble was gone, they were back in the Leg Ship.

 

Yellow Pearl walked over to the controls and did something, then informed them the ship was now on lockdown mode and was well guarded by a full Gem battalion. Before she left, Connie stopped her, asking for more information on the leader of The New Order. Yellow Pearl said she was not authorized to give that information. Connie pressed the issue and asked if she could ask for permission to. After some convincing from Garnet, the pearl agreed and then left.

 

Connie sighed after Yellow Pearl left, saying she was annoyed, but happy they would at least maybe get the information about the leader of The New Order.

“So, those New Order rebels sure were something.” Amethyst said, kicking off the limb enhancers and flopping to the floor.

 

Connie frowned, “Especially the leader.  I…I know this is going to sound weird but, is it possible she’s a Gem you know? Garnet or Bismuth? From the Crystal Gems?”

“Because she used himself for Steven?” Amethyst asked.

Connie nodded, “Yes, but not just that. There were other things, like how that one pearl yelled batter up and had roller skates, both distinctly human things, like they knew of Earth and were monitoring humans in a fond way.  Or how the leader fought…it was familiar.  Not exactly the same, like her left arm was a bit stiff and not as equally skilled as her right, and she took fewer risks, but the overall style and a few specific moves reminded me, of, well, Pearl.”

 

Garnet frowned, “Pearl did train a lot of Crystal Gems how to fight.”

Bismuth held up a piece of singed, black cloth, “There’s more.  Her clothes, they aren’t hardlight. At least not the outer layer.  Her sleeve was tattered and smoking after she redirected that electrical burst, and this in my hand is definitely fabric, I picked it up once we could move again.  And her left arm, it’s a prosthetic, but it doesn’t look like any prosthetic a Gem usually would ever make, more like what a human would with access to Gem tech. Or, a Gem with a lot of knowledge on humans.”

 

Garnet paced a little, “There weren’t a lot of Crystal Gem chrysoberyls though, and certainly not any with both electrical attunement and whose weapon was a pair of swords.”

Bismuth shook her head, “Those swords weren’t her Gem weapon, those were made of metal. I can hear the difference. The two pearls were using physical weapons and not Gem weapons as well. I also don’t think she’s a chrysoberyl. She’s strong enough to be one, but not fast enough. Besides, if we’re really leaning towards the Crystal Gem theory, that makes less sense since we have all the chrysoberyls that were on our side Corrupted and bubbled. So there’s no way it would even be a chrysoberyl still undercover when the war for Earth ended.  Unless more joined after I was bubbled.”

 

Garnet shook her head, “They didn’t.”

“A rogue pearl after all?” Amethyst asked.

Bismuth shook her head, “The Renegade was the only pearl in the rebellion.”

Garnet added, “Plus Yellow Diamond is right, Gem types are capped out at certain ranges for each attribute, Offcolors may push the limits, but even then, she is much stronger than a pearl would be.”

 

There was a long silence.

 

Connie broke the silence and changed subjects, “I guess we’ll just have to wait until we get more information on The New Order. So what’s our plan now, to get to Steven?”

Bismuth frowned as she thought, “First we have to find a way to sneak past the guards White sent and get off the ship, then we have to find a way to get all the way to Pink’s tower undetected and sneak into the top room where Steven will be.”

"How we do that is where it gets complicated." Garnet added.

 

The mechanically distorted voice they all recognized as the leader of the New Order suddenly answered from above them.

The masked figure clung to the side of the wall. "Don't worry, leave that part to me."

 

Before any of them could properly react, they were suddenly sucked into a different space. They were now in a dimly lit, rectangular room with dark grey walls and a black ceiling.  In the center of the room was a light blue tube containing several weapons, and a few other items like clothes, including the tattered shirt the leader had just been wearing, what looked like a medical kit, another kit Bismuth wasn’t sure what it was for, food, another helmet, and a mask that would just cover the eyes.

 

“Where are we?” Connie asked and drew her sword.

“I have no idea.” Garnet said and looked around, gauntlets at the ready.

“It…” Bismuth frowned, “it kind of reminds me of the inside of Pearl’s gem a little.  Except it’s kinda small, there’s no inner version, and there is a very different color scheme.”

“Great,” Amethyst sighed, “Sooooo, now we’ve been separated from Steven, detained by White Diamond, and then kidnapped to who even knows where by the leader of the local rebellion?”

Garnet paused and then stated matter-of-factly, “Yes.”  

 

“I mean, she said she would help us though.  And we’re also rebels, so I wouldn’t think the New Order would harm us.” Bismuth said, and looked over the weapons held in suspension.

She was impressed.  They were fairly well crafted.  Not exactly to her caliber, but definitely of expert skill.  She was excited that this was likely her best opportunity to join up as well.

 

Connie frowned. “I suppose that’s true, but she did still kidnap us without much warning.  If our ideals and the New Order’s ideals don’t completely align things could get dicey. And we have such little information on her.”

Garnet nodded. “Agreed.  We can’t let down our guard yet.”

Amethyst flopped onto the floor. “Great.”

Chapter 17: Reunion

11 deftly moved closer and closer to Pink’s tower.  Being on the surface was always dangerous for her, but being this close to areas under high scrutiny by the diamonds meant she had to stay on the move and out of sight until she got to Pink’s room.  Thankfully, she knew this route very well. 

 

11 used to travel this path all the time, and even though it had been thousands of years, very little had changed.  She felt her chest get tight as she approached the tower, soon, everyone would know she had been alive this entire time.  She would actually be able to talk to everyone, to hear how Steven’s voice had changed, to hug Bismuth, to hug all of them.

 

She shot out a shadow arm from her left side, digging claws into the side of the tower and then using it to quickly spring herself upwards. Her prosthetic arm felt a little off, the movement not as smooth, the connection at the post a little loose, and the sleeve clung in an unusual way against her stump and shoulder.  The electrical burst from the security prgram at the Grand Exhibition must have done some damage, even if there wasn’t pain now.  At least It was functional.  

 

11 shot her shadow arm up again and repeated the process until she saw the window to Pink's room.  11 took in a breath and then let it out slowly before finally flipping herself into the room and crouching down so she would be out of sight quickly if there were any onlookers.

 

Steven yelped and tripped backwards, landing on one of the cushions the pebbles had no doubt made. 

"Uh, h-hi there." Steven's voice squeaked and then he cleared his throat. "You're the leader of the New Order right?"

 

"That’s correct Steven." 11 brought out everyone from her gem and then slipped over to a control panel and placed her hand on it. 11 activated the room's private mode, which shielded the windows and ensured no one could listen in to conversations in the room. An upgrade she had designed herself back in the war for Earth. 11 stared at the wall, steadying herself with another breath before swiveling around.

 

"Oh stars! Friendly, I'm friendly!" 11 yelped and put her hands in the air as she saw everyone with weapons drawn, ready to fight. 

"What, is kidnapping people without an introduction a standard friendly greeting for you guys or something?" Amethyst sassed.

"Amethyst," Garnet gently reprimanded. "We appreciate your help getting us to Steven, but I do remain cautious as to your motive."

 

11 blushed and chuckled, realizing she had, in fact, just kidnapped them without even saying hello. "My apologies. I suppose how I brought you all here was rather rude. Your caution is quite understandable. I have to admit, I've been anticipating this moment for so long I may have let my emotions get to me and not think about the situation from your perspective. Being on the surface is dangerous for me, especially in this particular area. I just wanted to get us here with the safeties up as soon as I could."

 

Bismuth raised an eyebrow. "So you know this room well. And you’re familiar with us Crystal Gems.  Were you in Pink’s court or something? Or maybe even a Crystal Gem?” 

 

11 shrugged. “Yes, but things will make a lot more sense without this helmet on. Actually, you’ll probably have a few more questions first, but you’ll see.  I’m just going to use my right hand here to take the mask off, no funny business, no tricks.”

11 closed her left eye, not wanting to alarm them too much with that information yet.  Discovering she was alive in the first place was going to be shock enough.  

 

Then she slowly lifted her helmet off and smiled. “Hello again, everyone. Miss me much?”

Everyone’s guards and jaws dropped as they all gasped.

Bismuth started tearing up. “Is it- is it really you?”

 

11 grinned and let her arms fall to her side, clipping her helmet to her belt. “It’s really me. Good to see you out of a bubble again.  Love the new form by the way, especially that strapless shirt.”

“But, the transmission we saw, they shattered you, we have part of your gem!” Garnet stored her gauntlets and got rid of her glasses, revealing brows knitted from confusion and worry.

11 nodded. “They only pretended to shatter me.  They had… other ideas for punishing my defiance, but they wanted to send out a strong message against rebellion.”

 

11 expected more questions, but instead Bismuth started bawling, shifting her hammers back to hands and closing the gap between them so she could lift 11 into a strong hug. 

Bismuth squeezed. “Stars, oh stars, you’re alive, you’re really alive.”

11 tilted her head up and locked her lips with Bismuth’s, getting a surprised moan and another squeeze in response. 

Then she pulled back a little and clasped her arms around Bismuth while pressing her gem to Bismuth’s forehead. “I’ve missed you too, Bismuth.”

 

The next handful of moments were spent reuniting with everyone.  Hugs were exchanged with everyone.  11 marveled at how tall Steven and Connie were, and noted Connie was pink now.  She was excited when she noticed the matching wedding rings the two were wearing. She also couldn’t help but jab that she didn’t think the Pink Diamond outfit suited Steven any better than it did his mother, although the chest hair certainly did give it a different vibe. 

 

Garnet was quick to give her signature head pat, which was nice for 11 to feel one Garnet’s gems on her pearl after so long.  11 was again excited when she saw wedding bands on Garnet’s hands. Amethyst also even stayed on 11’s shoulders like she used to before Rose passed while 11 chatted with Garnet.  

 

Then Bismuth saw it and gasped. “Your, your gem,” she teared up again, “oh Pearl, they, they turned you into a mother of pearl?”

Garnet gasped and reacted as well. “No!”

 

11 nodded and sighed. “I go by 11 now, and I am a disgraced mother of pearl, more specifically. Or dishonored mother of pearl. We kinda use the term interchangeably.”

“What does the disgraced part add?” Garnet questioned.

11 replied, “Mostly that they were much rougher with how they treated me and the others in The Jackknife, the facility I was sentenced to.”

 

“Like, so rough you lost that eye?” Amethyst gulped.

“And your left arm?” Bismuth added.

“I,” 11 instinctively touched her left eye, “I did lose this eye, yes, although it’s complicated. As is my arm, honestly.” She chuckled, “I wondered if you had noticed or not Biz, after I used my prosthetic to neutralize that security discharge. Actually, since I have some time, I’m going to take advantage and maintenance it while I uh, catch up on some things.”

 

Amethyst hopped off and settled next to 11 as she sat and brought out her repair kit before powering down her arm, disconnecting the port, pressing in the button at the bicep to disconnect it from the post attached to her liner, and then removed her arm so she could put it on the stand and work on the damage that electrical charge had caused.  She decided to take the liner with the post off as well, but left the extra sleeve she liked as another cushioning layer on. 

 

Amethyst grinned and waved her own arm that was missing a hand and part of her forearm, “Oh hey, we're nubbin’ buddies now.”

11 smiled and laughed, “Well look at that, we are, high one?” She raised her stump with her sleeve as much as possible.

Amethyst grinned and they mimicked a high five while laughing.

 

11 returned her attention to her prosthetic and told everyone brief summaries of The Jackknife and the experiments, leaving out large swaths of details like the specific tortures and rape she endured, but giving them enough to understand that she had been intensively bred, hybridized after a failed rebellion, and then she and the others had escaped and been living peacefully until they decided to fight Homeworld.

 

"Trying to establish further communications and reach Earth so we could reunite and I could propose Earth as a refugee planet was actually a project I was hoping I'd achieve soon, but you're here now." 11 finished, slowly started opening her left eye, letting it adjust to the light and also letting the others adjust. Even though she warned them, she knew the actual feeling seeing the eye would cause would take some getting used to.

 

11 steadied herself as she sensed the small spike of fear seeing her eye fully opened caused. As usual, sensing fear tugged at her hunger a little. She found herself suppressing a very amused smirk as well once she sensed some arousal from Bismuth. She glanced over at the blacksmith just in time to catch a dark lavender blush on Bismuth’s cheeks and a somewhat confused look before she frowned and shook her head to focus herself.

 

"So," 11 glanced at the door panel which turned into a camera in this mode and confirmed there were no Gems nearby, "I think I can spare a little more time. Briefly catch me up to speed about what I've missed on Earth."

11 listened while she repaired some minor damage to the port that connected her shoulder to the arm. She also discovered her sleeve could not be removed, like it had partially melded with her hardlight body as it healed, which had no doubt been why it had hurt so bad when she had actually been dealing with the electrical discharge.  She looked at the inside of the liner with the post and saw damage where the metal met the fabric and residue from the stretchy and darker fabric of her sleeve.  The electricity must have coursed through the arm and then went up the post, heating up the liner and sleeve and burning her stump, or maybe even continuing on to the port and burning her hardlight body that way as well.  Either way, it was a bit of a conundrum to solve later.

 

She learned that Connie and Greg had both died and been resurrected, but that they learned after Lion and Lars passing it would still be limited and both were likely close to their ends again.  She learned Beach City had become a ghost town as climate change and normal coastal shifts had isolated them as an island and then had been purposefully flooded to save other coastal areas that were shored up.  The Temple was also partially underwater, although Bismuth had built a spire around it to keep it dry and accessible.

 

So many major changes.

 

As Steven was talking, 11 heard a beep that usually wouldn’t be audible, but only was since she wasn’t wearing her helmet.  She excused the intrusion and then placed her helmet on and took the call so she could hear it, but the others couldn’t.

 

“What is it?”

Sickle replied; she was panting and speaking only in Nacreous.  11 instantly picked up that she was extremely stressed.  There was a lot of background chaos.  She learned the extraction team had been ambushed.  Jolt with Black Opal, who was on the team to combat orders made if a gem figured out they were disgraced mothers, had made it out with the global communications core, but Rascal, Justice, and Sickle had been pinned down and were on the run in the heart of Homeworld.  

 

11 got up and checked the area. They were mostly still in the clear, Homeworld forces were mainly focused on the Stadium.  There were several patrols where all the Diamonds were located though, including here.  White’s orders for “Pink Diamond” were to remain sheltered until the high risk alert was lifted, which was unlikely to be for a few days.  11 decided to take a risk. 

 

11 gave Sickle instructions on how to gain access to a secret tunnel she had built herself back in her Crystal Gem days.  She suspected it may be damaged after all this time, but since things didn’t change as much on Homeworld it should be intact enough.  The tunnel would lead up to this tower without exposing them to the patrols.  The pebbles could meet them and help them get up to the room the way they used to for her or Rose.  Sickle calmed some and said they were on their way.   

 

11 removed her helmet and pulled some items from her gem she knew the pebbles would love.  Then she gently tapped on the wall and traded with the pebbles, smiling since it had been so long.  They agreed to help her and bring the three pearls up.

 

“Everything alright?” Garnet asked.

 

11 shook her head, “My team encountered some issues at extraction.  Three of them were stranded nearby so I’m having them use an old secret way of mine here so we can leave together.  Oh," she blushed, “sorry, I suppose I should have ran that by you all first.”

“Oh no,” Steven said, “it’s fine!  I don’t mind helping.”

Connie frowned, “It is a little risky.  We are trying to stay on the Diamond’s good sides to diplomatically find a resolution and get them to help us with Corruption, and find peace.”

11 nodded, “Yes, and getting caught with me and us rebels would not exactly be good.  I apologize, I wasn’t thinking of that.  We won’t be long, though.”

 

Steven looked a little crestfallen, “Oh, right.  I guess since you are the leader of the Diamonds' sworn enemy right now you can’t stay for long.”

11 walked over to him and hugged him tight, “Don’t worry Steven, they can’t keep me away forever.  Clearly, they’ve tried and failed after all.”

 

11 paused as she looked at Steven again, his face, how he was standing, the Pink Diamond outfit, she couldn’t help but frown.  She glanced at Connie and saw her give him another worried look. 

11 took in a deep breath and then let it out slowly, “And Steven, a little advice?”

Steven nodded, “Yeah! Anything.”

 

11 gestured to the outfit and the room, “All this?  Don’t bother.  I know you’re going the diplomatic route, and there’s nothing wrong with that, except stop trying to do it this way.  You aren’t your mother, and to be blunt, they never listened to her anyway.  And you can never be what the other Diamonds expect you to be.  So just be you, be Steven Universe.”

Steven blushed and laughed, looking at the outfit and his hands. “So…Mom did try?  To convince the Diamonds to change?”

 

11 nodded, “So many times.  I suppose, I’ve never been able to tell you that before.”

Steven frowned, “Because Mom didn’t let you.”

11 sighed, “She did order my silence, yes.  To be honest though, I wouldn’t have told you until Homeworld came back anyway.  I was still growing, and I wrapped so much of my identity in Rose back then.  Even after losing her, or, really, especially after losing her, clinging to my identity through her as her sole confidant felt like clinging to grains of sands of my own being as they slipped through my fingers.  Either way, I can tell you now.”

 

11 told them of going to Earth, back when it was just a standard colony, how Pink had wanted to see the Amethysts emerge in the Alpha Kindergarten and greet them, even if it wasn’t proper.  How 11 had learned by then that Rose liked when she was more creative with her suggestions and even when she spoke out of turn so she suggested they go down in disguise and that was how Rose Quartz in form came to be.  They toured the Earth, and Rose was happier than 11 had ever seen her.  Then they returned to the Kindergarten and Rose realized one of Homeworld’s big lies, that they weren’t creating life from nothing, but taking life away and leaving nothing behind.

 

“So, it was just a joyride but she like, had a revelation?”  Amethyst added.

11 shrugged, “Essentially at first, yes.”

She told them how as Pink she started trying to change the other Diamond’s minds.  There was so much they could learn, new resources, ways to revolutionize Gemkind as well as Earthlings, how life was precious, not just Gem life, but other life across the universe, even organic life.  She was ignored, she was told she was being immature, lazy, frivolous, they made the Zoo and threw a handful of humans and other Earth plants in it and told her to be satisfied with that amount of preservation.  She was told she needed to finish what she had started. Then, she was punished with the twilight and blackout towers when she persisted, and eventually, they punished 11 as well, knowing that capitalizing on Rose’s compassion and care for 11 was a surefire way to control her.

 

So, the Crystal Gems began.  Rose Quartz truly started to become Rose Quartz and 11 became the Renegade Pearl.  They just wanted to scare Gems off the planet though.

“Until,” 11 smiled and looked at Garnet, “you. Seeing your fusion, opening up that idea that there was so much potential we never considered from Gems because we just were never told it was possible.  And from there, well, everything changed. She wanted to fight for the Earth, she wanted to fight for you, for herself, and she wanted to fight for Gems and everything we could become.  She was always one of conflict and opposites, even her powers.  Destruction and raw power, combined with healing and creation.  She came from this place, devoid of compassion and at every turn designed to snuff out any compassion that started, but she still grew that compassion.  She loved and cared deeply for life and for all of us.  Imperfectly, certainly, and she caused harm.  But she caused so much more good and growth than harm.  Maybe she was foolish, maybe even selfish but…”

 

Garnet chuckled, “All this time…I’ve been seeing it as we were following Rose, but she was following us , all of us, how could she not, after you swept her off her feet?”

11 raised an eyebrow and chuckled, “W-what? Me?”

Steven laughed and clasped 11’s shoulder, “You took her on a whirlwind tour of Earth and then she decided she wanted to completely leave her old life behind so she could live on Earth with you forever.  I would say that’s a pretty clean sweep.”

 

11 blushed a little, a sadness settled into her chest, but not a clawing one.  The type that just sits and rests in the soul, an acknowledgement of something that would have meant so much long ago, but now, after moving on, is more like another finishing touch on a painting, or the punctuation at the end of a sentence.

 

“I suppose so.” 11 conceded. “Ultimately, this,” she gestured to the Pink Diamond outfit, “is nothing but an empty costume.  You’ve probably even seen your mother’s dressing room since you met the pebbles.”

Steven nodded, “I was kind of curious why she had that.”

11 nodded, “At first it was to try to pump herself up to be the Pink Diamond she was expected to be.  As the Crystal Gems grew and the war continued, it became a place for both of us to put our Homeworld costumes back on.  For me, the dress, the demure stances, and the vapid smile.  A mask I had long perfected even when I was completely loyal to Homeworld.  For her…for her it was a different type of pain, becoming Pink Diamond again.  She saw Pink as separate from Rose as I did, perhaps even moreso.  And who she truly was, was Rose.  Forcing herself back into Pink was untethering to her sense of self until it was unbearable for any length of time.  She used to even duck back into this room to change back into Rose for breaks.  Eventually, she just put off coming back to Homeworld all together.  This place, that form, was not only no longer her home, but a type of prison for her.  An unending, painful lie whose only end was death.”

 

Bismuth sighed, “A lie and a prison, like Homeworld and our roles were for the rest of us Crystal Gems. Maybe even more for her.”

Amethyst huffed, “Yeah, well, she’s gone now.  And we’re the ones that have to deal with all this.  11 is right dude, stop trying to be your Mom, or this Pink Diamond bull shit box the others are trying to force you into.  Be Steven, you know that’s the best you can be.”

Connie wrapped her arm around Steven and playfully added, “As I’ve been telling you, dear.”

 

Steven laughed, “All right, all right.  You’ve all made your point.  I guess I just…I don’t know, in some ways I almost feel like I’m fourteen again.  Being back here, dealing with this.  Guess I just lost sight of myself a bit.”

11 smiled and nodded, “Oh trust me, I can understand how fucking weird it is to be back on Homeworld.”

 

Amethyst was absolutely delighted by the swear word and Steven was briefly shocked.

Bismuth added, “I don’t know Renegade, I’d think the whole leading an entire civil war against the Diamond Authority might make the view a little different.”

Amethyst jested, “Especially with the very overdramatic theatrics.”

11 feigned indignation and stuck her nose in the air, “I’ll have you know our theatrics are exactly as dramatic as they need to be.”

They all laughed and teased a little.

 

Then there was a knock on the wall and a pebble appeared and made an even larger opening in the wall.

11 heard Rascal say, “Right, sooo I’m guessing head towards the hole you all just made?”

“Please tell me it is the last of the crawling,” Sickle added in Common. 

 

11 was pleased to hear Common from Sickle, it meant she was at least not completely stressed out now. 

11 crouched down at the new entrance and saw the three pearls, “Yes, it is the last of the crawling, dear friend.”

“Oh thank fuck.” Sickle grunted.

“Heya Boss!” Rascal greeted, “It has been crazy out here, and these tunnels!  They’re so pink and winding, I like them.”

“Get me out.”  Justice signed, “I disagree with Rascal.”

 

11 chuckled and helped the three pearls into the room, noting they all had minor injuries, and Sickle had a bad wound to her left thigh.

11 asked in Nacreous, “Is your prosthetic damaged in that leg?”

Sickle nodded.

11 frowned and promised to fix it once they got back to base. No wonder Sickle had been so tense, feeling the impact of her hip scars always gave her anxiety, and on top of that she was nearly captured again.

 

11 turned to Steven, “Would you mind healing them please?”

Steven blushed, “Er, not at all.  Just a warning for you three though, it uh, it’s a little gross.  See my healing power manifests through my spit.  I usually lick my hand and place it on a Gem that way.”

“Oh neat!” Rascal bounced over and held out her hand, “high five? Should I spit in my hand too?  Does that make it more, or less, gross?”

Steven hesitated, “Uh, no, your spit isn’t needed.  I’ll just,” he licked his hand and then gave Rascal a high five.

 

Rascal giggled, “Oh it feels a little fuzzy. Oh wow! I feel great now!  That’s even better than normal Diamond healing stuff!  Thanks bud!”

Justice walked over, pointed to 11 and asked her to translate, and then signed, “I don’t need a high five, just put it on the back of my hand.”

11 relayed the message to Steven and he put his spit on the back of Justice’s hand as requested.  There was a tense moment as Justice’s Shadow powers surged, 11 realized as it happened it was reacting to the more organic elements of Steven’s spit, but Justice got it under control before anyone else even noticed.

 

Steven walked over to where Sickle was leaning on 11 for support. 

Sickle’s face was twisted by a very open grimace as she asked in Common, “I don’t suppose there is any…other method you can administer your healing?”

Steven scratched the back of his head, “Um, I can give a small kiss to the back of your hand or something?”

Sickle recoiled slightly and cut the air with her hand as a no, “That is infinitely a much worser way. I suppose just…put it on my elbow.  There is less in feeling for an elbow than a hand, after all.” 

 

Sickle shivered a little and wiped away the spit as soon as she was healed but still thanked Steven.

“You probably need healing too, right?”  Steven asked 11.

11 and Sickle said in unison, “No!”

11 chuckled, “I mean, yes, but I have a Shadow wound right now, and we’ve discovered my form reacts quite adversely to Gem healing essence when I have a Shadow wound.”

 

Steven blinked, “Shadow wound?  Like…did you hit yourself on accident with your own power?”

11 explained that in a way, sort of.  Since hardshadow and hardlight were so opposing she had to maintain a somewhat tenuous balance within her form.  Certain powers were much easier to blend or branch off, like her transformations, teleportation, or Shadow arms.  Others were much harder and took a lot more concentration, and if she got it wrong, the two would clash and leave her with a slow-healing wound.  It was one of many reasons she limited her use of Shadow powers.

 

However when White Diamond had attacked she had formed a large Shadow shield out of necessity. She had to do it so rapidly she ended up not quite mixing it all correctly, which left a large wound on her back.  It was also the only reason they all survived though, so it was worth the damage.

 

Sickle held out her hand, “Speaking of which, give me a healing kit and off with your shirt.  I need to make sure you are stable and see how your back is healing.”

11 shook her head, “It can wait until we are back at base.”

Sickle put her other hand on her hip and said sternly, “11, now.  I am not about to let you keep rushing around heart of our enemy stronghold without check in.” 

11 shrugged, “I’m alright, really.”

Sickle looked at everyone else in the room, “Crystal Gems, tell me, has she always been this stubborn and thick crusted about taking care of herself and her injuries?”

 

They all responded yes.

Rascal giggled, “Wow Boss, that was quite a resounding yes with no hesitation.  You have a reputation.”

11 blushed.

Sickle tapped 11’s gem and then held that hand open, “Healing kit, shirt off.”

 

11 relented with a dramatic sigh and sat down, letting her cape fall and undoing the clasps of her shirt so it fell to her sides, held to her pants with a few buckles.  She had designed the shirt so she could quickly undress and transform into her smaller forms without damaging the clothes if absolutely needed, but it was convenient for this too.  She insisted she would not be unwrapping her chest though.  Sickle replied in Nacreous she needed 11’s back out, not her tit.  11 chuckled a little as she saw Rascal whispering to Justice and Justice signing, both of them commenting on Bismuth and their impressions of her.

 

Sickle slapped the scanner on 11 and frowned, “What…what is happening with your sleeve and left shoulder?”

11 grinned, “Oh, that, take a look, try to remove the sleeve.”

Sickle tried, found it had fused to 11’s shoulder and cursed, “Shit, I’m going to have to call your partner for help on this.  With so much previous damage, it will be tricky to remove.”

11 shrugged, “Might be best to just leave it and let it fall off next time I retreat into my gem.  It still functions as extra padding between my form and my prosthetic at least, especially with the liner as another layer, which only has a little damage. Although it may annoy the shit out of me.”

 

Sickle hummed and healed the few minor wounds from the fight with the garnets using the Handheld, then moved to her back.

Connie came over, curious, “I didn’t know Gems had any sort of medical tech.”

Sickle nodded, “It is a thing we mothers of the Jackknife developed.  Pioneered by this one’s partner, named Doctor.  Which to my understanding is a Earthman, no, human term she learned from 11.”

 

Connie smiled, “Yes, my mother was actually a doctor.  She didn’t have anything like this, though.”

11 noted the sadness in Connie’s voice and the was.  11 felt a little sad, that must have meant Connie’s parents had not been revived.  When she heard Greg and Connie had both been revived she had hoped Connie’s parents had been too.  She would have liked to have tea again with Dr. Maheswaran.

 

“So are these gouges and the huge grey spot the shadow wound?” Connie asked.

“The grey spot is.  The gouges are old scars from tor-”

“From Jackknife days,” 11 interrupted.

Sickle glared a little, she really didn’t like being interrupted.  Especially when speaking Common.  However 11 didn’t want to unload so much detail about the torture on her family.

 

Thankfully Rascal broke the tension, “Oh I can’t stand it anymore! How are you all so calm?! We’ve been excited for 11 to reunite with her Earth family for like, hundreds of years and now here we are!”

She rushed over to Garnet, “You must be Garnet right?  The Ruby and Sapphire that fell in love on Earth and are fused all the time? So romantic,” she clasped her hands and sighed and then moved to Amethyst, “And Amethyst! A friendly quartz! I’m still not completely used to friendly quartzes, but the ones I know tend to know how to party, sooooo if you’re anything like that we’ll become fast friends.

 “And humans!” Rascal pointed to Steven and Connie, “she was so sure and worried she’d never get to see you again but you’re here! And of course you doll,” she winked at Bismuth. “Lots of us are excited to meet you.  11’s long lost love. Doc has been particularly keen you and 11 reunite, seeing how she’s also in love with 11.”

 

Bismuth blushed. 

11 pinched the bridge of her nose. “Rascal.”

Rascal tilted her head and then gasped, “Oh right, sorry, you’re a shy one and we’re supposed to behave, my bad. But anyway, it’s a happy thing!”

11 redressed as Sickle finished healing and took the scanner off. “It is, it really is.  We do need to get going though.  There is bound to be a patrol around again soon, and no doubt one of the other diamonds or their pearls will come to check on Steven.”

Rascal pouted a little but didn’t say anything else.  

 

11 walked back to her arm and sat down.  She replaced the liner with the post and then secured the post into the socket of the prosthetic with a click. She moved the shoulder piece into place so it lined up with the port in her collar bone and further secured the arm.  She connected the arm to the port and waited a moment as it powered up by drawing from the energy of her hardlight body.  Once it was fully charged she lifted it from the stand, testing out the movement after her repairs.  Satisfied, she stored the stand and stood back up.  

 

11 looked at the camera again.

“Next patrol will pass by in a few minutes and then we’ll leave.”

Steven frowned, “Right, yeah, I guess you do have to go.  At least you brought me some company though.”

11 nodded.

 

“Wait,” Bismuth said, “I want to go with you.  I want to join the New Order.  No offense Steven, it’s not that I don’t have faith in your way, it just, well -”

Garnet added, “It’s not really your style.  You like to be doing, raising up the Gems deemed to be at the bottom, and to be bold.  I figured you only came along with us to join the New Order.”

Biz blushed, “Yeah, I just wasn't sure when the right time was.  I didn’t want to make anything harder for you guys.  But I mean, you can just say that after seeing the New Order up close and in action I was entranced or something.”

 

Sickle walked over to Bismuth and stared her down.  Biz fidgetted a little but didn’t back down.

Sickle nodded, “Yes, I like her.  I know you will vouch for her 11, but it had been some time.  I see nothing alarming, though.”

11 smiled, “Rascal, Justice, any objections?”

They both had none.

“Welcome to the New Order Bismuth, your skills will be greatly appreciated.” 

 

“Right,” Steven bit his lip, “just one thing though with the New Order. 11, would it be possible for you to temporarily cease New Order operations?  I know that’s asking a lot, but maybe I can go to the diamonds and say you came to me to request that as a third party The Crystal Gems and I will mediate between you two if they agree to a ceasefire.”

 

Sickle spoke in Nacreous, “Absolutely not.  We have far too many Gems to pull out of Homeworld’s way right now.  Not to mention those medical supplies we desperately need to stabilize that batch of tumbled Gems we just rescued.”

“We just gained a lot of traction, too.” Justice signed, “and we have no guarantee the diamonds will listen.  What if they just use it to try and track us down and attack again?”

11 sighed and said in Nacreous, “If we want peace, one of us eventually has to attempt it first.  And we do need the diamonds' help to heal the Corrupted Crystal Gems, and maybe even some of the badly injured Gems we’ve rescued.  Plus, for better or worse, they see Steven as one of them and are more likely to start listening to him,” she held her hand up to stop Sickle’s objections, “but we will not abandon Gems in grave danger.”

 

11 switched to Common, “We can’t completely cease operations, no.  There are Gems at risk of being caught, tortured, or shattered by Homeworld we have arrangements to free.  And there will be more Gems that reach out to us to be freed.  We won’t stop that.  It is a matter of life and death.  Plus there are some supplies we desperately and immediately need to stabilize some recently rescued Gems that were brutally tortured, the type of supplies that can help damaged gemstones.”

 

Steven put his finger to his chin as he thought, “I could, uh, spit a lot in a bottle if you have one?”

11 chuckled, “That would help, but I’m afraid it will likely not be enough.  Although…there is an extraction chamber near Pink’s room, the pebble’s can help you get to it.  It will allow you to sweat out the essence that gives you healing powers and collect it.  If you could collect a couple of vials of that I’ll send someone to retrieve it tomorrow and that would handle the most important supplies.  Just for a week, or maybe two.  There’s only so long I can stop supply runs.  We have a lot of colonies to look after.”

 

Steven nodded, “Done.”

11 glanced at Sickle and she nodded.  

“Then we will at least stop any further attacks like what we did today at the Grand Exhibition, or the wall of inner diamond sectors, and destruction of buildings, as well as inciting riots with music.  The only operations will be to evacuate refugees.  Unless the diamonds strike us. We will defend ourselves if they go that route.”

Steven smiled and nodded, “Perfect!  That will give me time to talk with Yellow and Blue and figure out how to get an audience with White.”

 

11 hummed, “You could try a ball.”

“Like…juggling?” Steven raised an eyebrow.

11 chuckled, “No, as in the dancing type.  It’s not exactly the most exciting thing, but all Diamonds are expected to attend, and your mother was known to throw massive balls so it won’t be seen as an odd request.”

Steven perked up, “Oh, perfect! Yeah, I’ll do that after offering to mediate!”

 

11 nodded, “Excellent. Alright, so initially all of you going with me will need to go into my Gem, once we’re out of the hardest zone to sneak through I’ll bring Justice and Rascal out for backup.  Sickle, the second you’re in my Gem you start working on what we will send out as new orders for our truncated operations.  Work fast please, if we are to get all the changes out in time I will need a draft by the time we reach base.  Bismuth, just hold tight.  I do trust you, but it is custom to not have new recruits know the exact location and path to our bases.  For safety.”

 

Sickle frowned and whispered in Nacreous, “My one leg might be out, but I am not so useless you need to give me busy work in your gem.”

11 replied in Nacreous, “Dear friend, it is not busy work.  We have a mere three hours to get all the new orders out before our next mission, and you are my second in command.  I can store you in my gem, I know this area much better, and I have teleportation abilities.  It makes more sense for you to be drafting these orders in my gem while I get us back to base than for you to carry me in your arms while I draft them.”

Sickle blushed a little, “Oh, right. Yes, that…sorry, I was not thinking.  I am a little on edge still, I suppose.”

11 placed a hand on Sickle’s shoulder, “No need to apologize, dear friend.”

 

11 glanced at the video feed again, “Alright, time is nearly up.”

“Wait!” Steven said but then faltered and started to fight tears, “Just, please…come back when you can?”

11 teared up as well and hugged Steven again.  He squeezed her back and to her surprise, Garnet joined, followed by Connie and Amethyst.

“I will, I promise.” 11 said, “Like I said, they can’t keep me away forever, they’ve already tried and failed.”

 

The five of them were crying now as they broke their embrace, as were Rascal and Bismuth.  

11 wiped the tears away, glanced at the camera and sniffled, “Oh, go time.”

She stored Rascal, Sickle, Justice and Bismuth in her Gem.  Then she put her helmet on, turned off the security mode and teleported down to the tower base below.

Chapter 18: Old Lovers

Bismuth fidgeted as Rascal and Justice stared at her, Rascal whispering and Justice's hands moving.  She could tell they were talking about her even though she didn’t know either language.  Biz tried to ignore it, but there wasn’t much else happening.  Sickle had waved her hands at the container 11 had items stored and revealed additional items, taking a data pad before returning the storage tube back to its original place, sitting down, and furiously typing.

 

Biz looked over the weapons again and said, “Sooo, the inside of 11’s gem sure does look different.  Weird to be in here without an inner version of herself too.”

Rascal answered her in Common, “None of us disgraced mothers of pearls have access to our true inner dimension.  11 gained this when she was hybridized.  She has an inner spirit dimension that is completely different and houses the souls she inherited from Shadow or that she's eaten and all the levels of her soul are organized there. Buuuut like I said, that’s really different.”

 

Bismuth nodded slowly and let herself process that information, especially the souls she's eaten and levels of her soul parts. “So her soul is… fractured now?”

Rascal put her hands behind her back and rocked on the balls of her feet, “Not exactly, well maybe, actually not really sure how that all works. 11 can explain it better but essentially when she was hybridized she had to sort through the strong emotions that cause her to lose control. Each one is tied to a different transformation, and once she gained control of them they like, stayed in their own layer within her soul dimension? Like how we pearls store impactful memories at different layers in our gems. Does that make sense?”

 

Bismuth looked around again, “Kind of? Her new powers are tied to emotions and she had to learn to compartmentalize them in order to have control of them?”

Rascal nodded, “Yeah, basically.”

 

A long silence followed.

 

“Sooooooo,” Rascal grinned, “what was 11 like when she was younger? Like, when she was a Crystal Gem.”

Biz laughed, “I mean, in some ways not too different from what I can tell. But also very different at the same time. She was absolutely devoted to Rose and rebellion, a fierce fighter, excited to explore and do all the things she had been told she couldn't by Homeworld. She was…always a little unsure of herself though, nervous about a lot of things, and certainly as naive as all of us were back then. Everything was new, none of us really knew what we were doing.”

 

Rascal smiled, “That's beautiful, getting to stumble around and figure it all out together. We mothers have experienced that too. Both with each other as we rebelled in The Jackknife and built our life after, and now observing everyone joining The New Order.”

 

Justice signed something and Rascal laughed. She added, “Justice has requested I translate for her, she wants to know if 11 has always been a goofy nerd with a reeeeally strong case of the cleaning urge.”

Biz laughed from her gut, caught off guard by the bluntness. She grinned, “Oh absolutely. And she's always been a workaholic who overthinks things. In a lot of ways, that's how we bonded so fast. That and the deep devotion to our loved ones and to freedom.”

 

Justice grinned and nodded. The three chatted a bit more, exchanging more of their backgrounds, what led Bismuth to rebel, what got Rascal and Justice sentenced to The Jackknife. Then they became quite animated as Rascal and Justice showed off their weapons. Using tech woven into the weapons the pearls could actually extend their forms’ energy into them, making the weapons stronger, able to complete customized transformations, and be recalled if they are knocked away.

 

Rascal's hammer could become an oversized baseball bat that was quite effective as a club, and Justice had heavy gloves for punching she could also extend and retract razor sharp blades from between the knuckles like claws. Bismuth didn't get a chance to see them, but she was told Sickle had a foldable sickle and a foldable scythe, her weapon transformation focused on easy storage rather than additional features in a fight. She also had tech in her shoes that let her glide ever so slightly when she wanted, giving her increased movement in a fight without overstressing her legs.

 

Bismuth was excited to see the base, meet more rebels, and, most importantly, see what the forge setup was. She didn't have to wait long after 11 pulled them all out of her gem and into a spherical room decorated with plants Bismuth didn't know still existed on Homeworld and illuminated with a soft blue glow.

 

Sickle gave the data pad she had been working on to 11. They spoke in that unique language the mothers used for a while. Then 11 came over and told Bismuth to follow Sickle; they would meet up again later, but 11 had to do some work first. 

 

Sickle immediately led Bismuth to the bases's Forge.

“I figured I'd start the tour with where you are likely to spend most of your time. You bismuths do so hate idle hands, after all.” Sickle smirked.

Bismuth grinned, “You are correct.”

 

Bismuth became more and more animated as she looked around. The basic setup was almost identical to her Earth set up during the Crystal Gem rebellion, but then there were much more advanced elements for weaving in tech and more delicate smithing. The possibilities lit up her face and she couldn't help but compliment and comment on all the things while pointing at them and even bringing out scratch paper from her gem and sketching an idea out.

 

Bismuth saw Sickle smirking as she turned back to her, causing Bismuth to blush a bit, “Sorry, got excited.” 

Sickle chuckled, “No need for sorry, it is nice to see a Gem so passionate about anything. Now come, I'll show you Commons, Meeting Hall, where you can find 11 most of the time when she's at base, and what will be your quarters. Oh and introduce to the other bismuths if you like.”

 

Bismuth nodded and found herself impressed over and over. She couldn't tell exactly where on the planet she was still, since this wasn't a structure she had helped build, but she could tell it was a part of Homeworld that hadn’t been touched since the dawn of Gemkind. Now it was teeming with organic life, grasses, shrubs, flowers, and trees, which she was informed were all native to Homeworld, and of course, the hustle and bustle of all the rebels. 

 

The New Order reminded Bismuth of the later Crystal Gems in some ways, in that there was a mixture of Gems brand new to freedom and others that had been there for a bit, but also it was completely different. There was a more open, but still cautious, nature she wasn’t as familiar with. Everyone was a little more aware of how wrong things could go, but it didn’t stop them believing in the cause. 

 

Some actually were former Crystal Gems that hadn't been extracted to Earth before the Diamonds’ final attack who had been hiding and waiting for a new leader. It was nice to reunite with them, although bittersweet as she had to update them on a few friends when asked. Most were Corrupted and found and bubbled since 11 had been taken from Earth, but one unfortunately had been shattered and used by Homeworld in the artificial fusion experiment. 

 

Her quarters were plain, and a little on the small size, but adequate. A perfect place to rest or have a private moment. Which was all she needed anyway. She knew she'd spend little time there after all. It was still nicer than a lot of Crystal Gem bases. Most of the time they didn't even have individual rooms, they would all just cluster together or share a tent with at least one other Gem.

 

Bismuth found herself more nervous than expected as Sickle led them towards the bismuths.

“Can we pause for a moment?” She asked.

Sickle stopped, “If you are trying to make an excuse for me to get a break, no. I may be limping, but it is nothing.”

Bismuth blushed a little and scratched the back of her head, she actually hadn't noticed that Sickle was limping.

 

Sickle's expression softened a little then, “Ah, it is not that.” She paused and looked at Bismuth more, “When was the last time you saw another bismuth?”

Bismuth’s blush burned her entire face now, caught off guard by how well Sickle could read her despite just meeting. “Um, er, well, there were a handful in the Crystal Gems but I never really interacted with them, I was pretty much always in my Forge, and when I wasn't it was for a mission, or a battle, or with other Crystal Gems that weren’t bismuths, or, well spending time with 11 or Rose of course. I uh, kinda always had a hard time fitting in with bismuths. Other Gems and I just clicked more. And since I've been out of the bubble these past hundreds of years it's just been me, Amethyst, Garnet, Steven, and the humans.”

 

Sickle grinned for a brief moment and nodded, “Another way you are similar to 11 then. She never really connected with pearls on Homeworld and had been isolated for so long,” she rested her hand on bismuths forearm, “I assure you, it is worth the try. You will be out of place first, but it can get better. And remember, these are not Homeworld bismuths. These ones are more like you, rebels shunned by Homeworld. It is wonderful that connections with other Gems come easy for you, but there is peace with others of your own that can be rewarding.”

 

Bismuth felt herself relax more and chuckled, “I'm glad 11 has a friend like you.”

Sickle blushed a little then, “Feeling is mutual. Now come, I fibbed earlier, my leg is quite painful and I would like to return to 11 for repairs.”

So Bismuth followed Sickle to a large room filled with bismuths lounging about and laughing, several of them had cubes they were idling fidgeting with that had different things like buttons, a sphere they could roll or a switch.

 

They were all happy to see Sickle and fretted over her a little when they saw her limping. She assured them she had that handled and then introduced Bismuth. They were all excited, they asked her so many questions about her Crystal Gem days and to Bismuth’s surprise she had heroic tales of her own that had been passed amongst the bismuths from that time, some more true than others. It was nice. Her nerves fizzled quickly and she even found herself laughing amongst them like they were old friends. 

 

They gave her a standard communicator issued to all New Order members and helped her set it up and showed her how to use it. The first message she sent was to 11, “All settled in.”

The bismuths teased her a bit for “schmoozing up to the Boss already” knowing full well their history. Bismuth took it with stride and fired a jab back of her own that got a howling laughter out of many.

 

Bismuth had such a good time she didn't notice Sickle leave. Eventually though she wanted back to the Forge. The bismuths told her to have fun and invited her to a get together later that week.

 

A few hours quickly passed as she got a feel for this new forge. She made a few simple swords and shields at first, her go-to for warming up. Then she made some support jacks for some walls she noted when she was being shown around. Next she made three different versions of some thin, lightweight, but sturdy guards for Sickle's thighs to protect her implants.

 

Finally she studied how the transformation technology worked and recreated 11's spear so that 11 could install tech to turn it into a wand for storage and shoot lasers just like her Gem weapon. Of course she recreated the look as well, the delicate swirl of the spear tip, the half star at the butt of the staff, the light teal and yellow accents along the cream. It took several iterations, but she still managed to figure it out quickly.

 

As if on cue, 11 and Sickle showed up as she was making the final touches on 11’s spear. Both pearls were ecstatic about the gifts. Sickle was impressed by how light the guards were and how they fit so well she could barely even feel them. 11 instantly started installing tech into the spear, gushing about how she had tried to recreate her spear herself but had lacked the skill.   

 

A few modifications to the tech 11 had already made in her own attempt and one

 install later, 11 had a spear again. She held it up, her chest puffed out while she admired the pointed tip. One of her eyes watered and she wiped it away with a chuckle.

 

“I didn’t realize how much I’d truly missed my spear until now. I suppose it is very identifiable so I can’t use it in battle much yet, but having it again makes me feel much more secure. Thank you Biz.”

Bismuth smiled and nodded, “You know you’ve always been my favorite Gem to arm.”

 

“Thank you as well,” Sickle said as she fiddled with the leg armor, “I appreciate less worry about damage to my prosthetics now. That was quite an unpleasant experience today.”

“Thank you for giving me a tour and encouraging me to meet the other bismuths. I honestly wouldn’t have done that without you.”

Sickle shrugged, “Think nothing of it.”

 

11 put her staff into wand mode and stored it in her gem, then spoke to Sickle in their unique language, Nacreous, the bismuths had told her it was called. Apparently the mothers of the Jackknife had developed it themselves to build community and communicate in secret more easily. Sickle nodded and left, the door clicked in an odd way after her.

 

“I, uh, asked her to give us some privacy. We have some catching up to do after all.” 11 looked down and frowned.

Bismuth used a single finger to gently tilt 11’s head back up, “I’ve missed you dearly.”

11 blushed a little and smiled, “As have I missed you dearly.”

 

11’s hands played against each other a bit and she pulled away a little, “I, I owe you an apology. Many apologies really. First, for my behaviour in the war, how I kept throwing myself into unnecessary danger and trying to sacrifice myself for Rose, how I didn’t always prioritize our relationship as much as I should have, and… and for not fighting to get you released from the bubble again when Steven brought you back. I should have done that, you deserved that. I’m sorry, I’m truly sorry.”

 

Bismuth paused, a little surprised and unsure what to say. Eventually she chuckled, “Well, you’ve really been focusing on your communication skills since I last saw you.”

11 shrugged and grinned, “Just a little bit.”

 

“Thank you,” Bismuth said, “and I accept your apology and forgive you. I could never hold anything against you. I appreciate that you didn’t try to make any excuses or try to explain things away, too.”

11 blushed again, “Yeah, I used to be really bad about that. I was insecure in myself and I could see it damaging my relationships, but I didn’t make any changes.”

 

Bismuth paused again, “It’s not an easy thing to do. I have my own issues too, there were…there were a lot of things I held back and just didn’t say either.”

“You always have been a more private Gem, focused on others and freely accepting, but reserved about yourself.”

Bismuth laughed, “Yeah, yeah, you know me.  I… I was a little angry for a while. After some of the initial grief wore off, that you left me in that bubble. I understood, I was out of line and I hurt Steven. I was, well, I was downright paranoid with him even. But…I wished you had given me a second chance, especially since, well, since I felt so betrayed that Rose never gave me one either.”

 

11 teared up and wiped them away.

Bismuth took in a deep breath and let it out slowly, “Garnet told me though.”

11 raised an eyebrow, “Told you what?”

“You did fight for me,” Bismuth smiled, “Garnet was going to leave me in the bubble indefinitely because my future was so clouded and she was overwhelmed with all the unknown variables. You convinced her otherwise though, you agreed that the risk to Steven couldn’t be ignored, but also you could talk to me, that once Steven had full control of his powers and could defend himself better you would give it a chance.”

“Oh,” 11 fidgeted more, “I didn’t think she had actually listened to me.”

 

Bismuth nodded, “She did. I admit…I still feel a little betrayed, but, I miss and love you far more than that. Honestly, the betrayal from Rose stings a lot more. I get it, shattering a bunch of Gems wasn’t the answer. I really do understand that now. I’ve worked through a lot of the anger and grief that drove me to make The Breaking Point in the first place. Losing so many friends, and then the torture White Moissanite put us through and the horrific death of our little ones, it, it messed me up. That’s not an excuse or anything, just something I had to work through, and I am glad I never got to use The Breaking Point. I have no qualms about using violence in order to overthrow this fucked up authoritarian system and protecting my loved ones, but…but I think actually shattering a Gem would have broken me. At the time I convinced myself it wouldn’t, I was a true freedom fighter after all, but it would have, and part of me knew it even back then. Now if the Diamonds end up shattered you bet I'm not shedding a tear, well, unless they hadn't had a chance to undo Corruption, but it would be for my comrades then, not those tyrants.”

 

11 shifted weight from one foot to another, “Agreed, the Diamonds have value for now, but I certainly wouldn't miss them if they were gone, I would miss the healing and restoration that we can achieve if we can get them on board. Not wanting to personally shatter anymore doesn’t make you less of a freedom fighter you know. It’s a good thing. We talk a lot about it in The New Order, there are plenty of us that, like you and I, are soldiers through and through, and there are those who have other roles that are just as vital, support roles like medical, communication, subverting Homeworld’s laws through words and song, it’s all needed. And amongst us soldiers, we have to keep each other in check when we go too far past the line and start losing ourselves and our supports help with that as well. We didn’t have that in the Crystal Gems. It was just seen as bad, inappropriate, Homeworld behavior even. That left a huge communication gap amongst all of us and bottling up those feelings, and even shame, for me at least. I thought this anger I had was nothing but an ugly flaw, a sign of how much lesser I still was than Rose even. Unfair of me on a lot of levels, but that was where I was at and that was where communication about the topic was at. I also lost myself for a while after White Moissanite and the death of our gemlings, particularly after your disappearance.”

 

“Yeah, Garnet told me. She said you even broke up with Rose and left the Crystal Gems for a while, she never fully knew why. She said you were so angry with everyone and then were gone one day after a huge fight with Rose and then a while later Rose brought you back and the anger was gone, but you were even more reckless.”

11 nodded and looked down again, “A part of me really wanted to die then, to be frank, when Rose brought me back. Mostly though I just channeled all my love for her into everything I did, convinced myself I wasn’t being reckless, I was just showing that love, even though it hurt me, even though it hurt her.”

 

“What,” Bismuth bit her lip, “what did make you leave?”

11 blushed again, “I wanted to find you. I searched every free moment after the Battle for the Ziggurat. I was so scared you were gone for good, I convinced myself instead you must have been captured again and I needed to save you. I couldn’t understand why Rose was so hesitant, why she started discouraging my search. Then one day…she broke her promise to me, she ordered me to stop looking for you, as Rose. She swore she’d never give me an order as Rose. So I told her she needed to lift that order or I would leave because she clearly didn’t actually respect me and my autonomy. She said that was unfair and she just wanted to protect me and didn’t lift it, so I left.”

 

11 began rubbing circles into the palm of her hand, “To get around the order, I started searching for the emerald that had been in charge of the facility we were tortured at. I hunted her down across the Earth, no matter how far she ran from me. When I finally pinned her down, she said she didn’t know where you were. I cut off her arms and legs and asked her again, and she gave me access to her system to prove it. I confirmed, Homeworld did not have you, not on their official record, and not on their blacklist records either. I forced the emerald into her gem and was about to shatter her when Rose found me. When she stopped me from crushing that emerald to shards, it hit me that you were really gone and all that anger just fizzled out.”

 

Bismuth found herself at a loss again, she was touched 11 had been so adamant about searching for her, but it unnerved her the lengths she went and how reckless she had been. Bismuth also knew if the roles were reversed she would have done the same. 

“I…it worries me a little you put yourself at such a risk for me, but, I can’t say much, I would have done it for you too. I feel guilty I didn’t search for you harder once Steven brought me back.”

 

“Oh Biz, you couldn’t have known, I know Homeworld sent a message out with a fake recording of my shattering, and that you all somehow received it with some Off Colors I assume Steven befriended to get back to Earth, and that they attempted to steal my ‘shards’, and the only one they got was the actual chunk they took from my gem when they turned me into a mother of pearl. If I had video evidence, even if it was a little suspicious, and an actual shard from your gem, I would also have not searched for you. Homeworld was thorough with faming my shattering, they even…they even, in a time of dwindling resources, rush ordered a pearl to be made to look exactly like me just to shatter her for that footage. I had hoped they had just faked it another way, but Jolt dug it up from their records in one of batches of data we stole. They went to great lengths to convince you all I was dead.”

 

“Why?” Bismuth asked, “So we wouldn’t come for you?”

11 shook her head no, “So you would come, to avenge me. Specifically, they were still thinking Steven was Rose and trying to draw her out. When we were Pink Diamond and her Pearl, they often used me as leverage to control Pink, they would throw me in the blackout or twilight tower for instance when she kept doing something they didn’t approve of. They always assumed she was maliciously making mistakes to manipulate them so they would manipulate her in ways that hurt her emotionally because that was the only way they saw was ‘viable control’, they said that to her even. So, they were assuming they could manipulate Rose to come for my shards herself, and capture her in Yellow’s throne room. They didn’t realize she’s gone, nor did they expect the existence of Off Colors on Homeworld, and certainly not ones bold enough to steal from Yellow Diamond.”

 

Bismuth felt a pit in her stomach burning up to her chest, “Fuck, that’s…that’s so awful. I didn’t, I never realized how bad Homeworld was for Rose. I guess, I guess that helps explain some things. I just also, I don’t know. I don’t understand why she didn’t give me a second chance. She’s all about second chances! I saw her give second and third and fourth chances to so many other Crystal Gems!”

 

11 sighed, “She gave me a second chance after all. After attempting to shatter that emerald.”

“Exactly!” Bismuth felt her voice strain as she fought tears, “So why? I know my relationship with Rose wasn’t like what you two had, and it was certainly different than what you and I had, but, but I was more than just a comrade, and I was more than just a friend! At least, I thought I was.”

 

“You were,” 11 assured, “you were. I know you two never really formally established a relationship, but I know she did love you, and you were certainly more than just a friend.”

“So why?!” Bismuth couldn’t stop the tears now, “Why couldn’t she have just, been honest with me? Told me who she was and how just shattering the other Diamonds wasn’t the way? Why couldn’t she explain things so they would make sense! The questionable battle tactics, her disappearances with you, the precariousness of her position. I would have understood! I would have still seen her as Rose! I probably would have pushed her to be more transparent with everyone, and even with the Diamonds, but I wouldn’t have…I wouldn’t have wasted my second chance if she gave me one. I wouldn’t have hurt her like that. I could never have hurt her like that, if only I had known.”

 

Bismuth covered her face with both of her hands as more tears fell. She shuddered a little as she felt 11’s hands on her, she couldn’t help but note the prosthetic was warmer than she expected and not as delicate, but still gentle, still 11, it was different, she was different, but she was still her.  Bismuth let 11 lower her hands and saw she was crying as well.

 

“I don’t know Bismuth. I can’t know, none of us can. The only one who can truly answer those questions is Rose, and she’s gone.”

Bismuth sniffled, “Gone, and we’re left with the pieces,” she chuckled mirthlessly, “and she would hate to know that too.”

 

11 nodded, “Agreed, she would hate to know she left behind so much pain. She did love you, and me, and the Earth, and all the Crystal Gems. She was filled with so much love, genuine, deep, passionate love. Her grief to see loved ones in pain was so great her tears healed us. She was also deeply conflicted, and she, she hated herself in a way I never fully saw when she was still alive. That doesn’t make it all right, that’s not an excuse, it’s just…”

Bismuth sighed, “No one’s perfect, no love is perfect, just because there were bad things doesn’t mean all of her actions were disingenuous. I guess I really shouldn’t be angry.”

 

“No,” 11 assured, “you’re allowed to be angry, you’re allowed to be hurt. Things happened to you and no one else owns your feelings about that. And your pain, your anger, doesn’t have to be an accusation, sometimes it just is.”

 

Bismuth teared up again and nodded, “I miss her 11. I miss her so much. I’ll never forget when she recruited me. She said you had mentioned me to her as someone with potential, she made me look at all the things in Homeworld that made me uncomfortable but I avoided thinking about and confront that I knew it wasn’t the right way. And when I had a moment of despair where I felt everything I had ever accomplished under Homeworld was worth nothing, was just wasted effort, she said that it did mean something, and Homeworld was hoping we never realized it. And that changed everything for me. That one sentence rewired my whole outlook, made me realize how much worth I had, despite how much Homeworld didn’t want me to know it. She was so important to me, and she always will be and now she’s gone and I don’t know what to do with that and I don’t even know where to begin on unpacking how things ended between us.” 

 

11 nodded,“All we can do is remember her, all of her, the good, and the bad. Not as some perfect beacon of a Gem on some lofty pedestal with expectations no Gem could ever live up to, not as some secret evil destroying all of our lives, but a flawed, well-meaning, hurt Gem who loved deeply and imperfectly. I often describe my own feelings with her as a never-closing wound, it’s not a scar, it’s raw, it hurts, and I know if she could cry her healing tears on it and mend it she would, but she can’t, so I’m left to tend to the wound, to keep it from festering, and to hope that slowly as time and life moves on, I can continue to move on, too.”

 

Bismuth clutched herself, “Yeah, yeah, that’s a damn good description, Renegade. A damn good one.”

 

There was a long pause again and Bismuth felt a peace was over her, relaxing her jaw she didn’t realize she was clenching, her hunched shoulders, the vice grips her hands had of her arms. She let her arms fall to her sides and dangle as she looked around the New Order’s forge. Then she looked at 11, timidly watching her and patiently waiting. Bismuth smiled and cupped 11’s face with her hand, brushing away a stray tear and feeling the roughness of the scar under her eye. “Thank you.”

 

11 smiled back and nuzzled into Bismuth’s hand, “My pleasure, Bismuth.”

Bismuth dropped her hand and grinned, “Soooooo, you have a new lover I heard.”

11 blushed and chuckled, “We’ve been together for a few hundred years now, so I don’t know if new is exactly the word, but yes. She’s a fellow dishonored mother of pearl, her name is Doctor, or Doc for short. She is also a healer, although she doesn’t have anything like healing tears or spit, instead she has in depth knowledge of how our hardlight bodies work and how energy flows through it and has used that knowledge to create skills and techniques supported by tools and technology.”

 

Bismuth smirked, “A master of her craft then, impressive.”

11 stood taller and puffed her chest out, “Yes, she’s also damn good with a shield and javelin, plus during this war she’s developed her own techniques for hand-to-hand combat utilizing her knowledge of energy flow to take down opponents much stronger than her.”

 

Bismuth couldn’t help but let happiness buzz through her just because 11 was so happy at that moment, “Sounds like quite the catch. And she uh, is okay with us, if we decide to keep our relationship going?”

 

“Oh yes, absolutely,” 11 assured, “we aren’t monogamous. Although she isn’t romantically involved with anyone else at this point, just other ways. I struggle with jealousy sometimes still, but nowhere near as bad as I used to with Rose and Greg, and our communication is very strong. She's been very excited to meet you.”

 

“I'm excited to meet her too, sounds like she's been taking good care of you.”

11 looked away, still smiling, “Yes, she has. She helped me through so much of the worst of The Jackknife. We helped each other really. I can't imagine my life without her. So you said if we continue our relationship.“

 

“I suppose if isn’t exactly the right word. I would like to continue, if you want to as well. I just, I’d like to take things slow. Honestly I’m kind of still in shock that you’re still alive. I’m so happy you are, and I love you so much still, but it’s just, I don’t know.”

11 smiled, “It’s a lot to process. When we first got together we did go so fast, just overwhelmed with passion and the impatience of being young and new to freedom. Then there was that period we did start slowing down and everything felt so much more intimate. And then we were captured and I thought you were dead for thousands of years and then you thought I was dead for hundreds. Certainly an emotional roller coaster. I’ve changed a lot as well, and I’m sure you have too. Oh right there’s also the whole war on Homeworld tyranny I won’t let go of until the Diamonds have been removed from their thrones and the entire system is overhauled. Little details like that,” she jested.

 

Bismuth laughed, “Yeah just a few minor little details. I am happy to be with you again, and I’m excited to be at your side as we strike the final blows to this fucked up system the Diamonds havr forced for far too long on too many Gems.”

“And the eradication of organic life across the galaxies they control,” 11 added, “I no longer want to be complicit with a system of thinking that places us above all other life and snuffs it out for our own short-sighted gain.”

 

Bismuth shifted one of her hands into a hammer, “Show me where to start then Boss.”  

“I don’t trust the Diamonds to maintain the ceasefire until a treaty can be made. Since Steven will supply us with healing essence we can hold off on supply runs for a few weeks, maybe more, and our attack missions are on hold. Which means any time we aren’t extracting Gems defecting from Homeworld I will have all hands overhauling our defenses and training. I need our skills and our weapons sharp, and our defenses near impenetrable. Think you can lead the efforts for fortification and weapons for new recruits here on Homeworld as you did for the Crystal Gems on Earth?”

 

“Of course.”

“Good, report to Sickle tomorrow morning. You will have your own team, but she will be your direct report since I will be switching her to managing the overhaul for this quadrant. Welcome to the New Order. Their order is not our order.”

“Their order is not our order.”

Notes:

I finally got past this chapter! I don't know why it gave me so much trouble, but I'm kind of glad it did because Rebecca Sugar casually dropped some Rose and Biz sketches that sparked a lot of ideas and helped me finish this chapter. Not sure if I'll post next week or the week after, but I do have the next two chapters written (I actually finished them a while ago, just couldn't get this one done, writing be like that sometimes) so we'll see.

Chapter 19: Let's Have a Ball

Steven wiped sweat from his brow and watched as a pink essence was automatically drawn from his sweat and into a glass bottle. It was a faster process than he expected and he'd already filled seven of them and he was working on an eighth.

Connie smiled, “This sure is neat. I wonder if we can get something back home like this so you can have healing vials around for the others when you aren't there.”

 

Steven tried to make his voice sound upbeat, to not betray what he was feeling and thinking, but the tone still came out sad as he said, “Yeah, that would be neat.”

Connie frowned and gently placed a hand on his forearm, “What is it Steven?”

 

For a moment he thought about lying, about telling her anything except what his brain kept circling over and over. He couldn't think of anything else though. 

After a long pause he quietly said, “That feeling, when 11 opened her Shadow Eye, I recognized it. It was less intense, but it was the same feeling as those nightmares I used to get. In the early days of 11's disappearance. The ones where I'd see her but it was like some distortion was overlaid on her.”

 

Connie was quiet for a beat, “I remember you telling me about those. You think it was Shadow trying to connect you with 11 don't you?”

“What else could it be? And that last nightmare I had of her, her voice was so much clearer, and she told me she was alive and was about to tell me where she was sentenced. And I shut her out. Put up that hexagonal shield I had just unlocked and it completely removed her presence from my dreams. I thought it was symbolic at the time. But what if it wasn't? What if it was actually her? She could have told me where she was, and something only she would know for me to prove she was alive. She could have told me to look for Mom's ship! We could have saved her, her and all those other pearls, and I could have prevented hundreds of years of agony!”

 

There was a long pause. That “we” becoming an “I” weighed down the entire room. It was true the potential for the change that could have happened was massive. And Connie remembered how everyone had given up on 11 being alive still at that point, everyone except Steven. Even she had given up on 11 being alive. They had all convinced him to give up on her too. But they really had been wrong. It wasn't like they wanted to be right either, and Steven had been tearing himself apart at the time.

 

“We couldn't have known Steven,” Connie whispered, fighting tears, “those nightmares were so distorted, we could never have imagined a being like the Shadow. And we had that video, verified by a chunk of her gem that was completely inert. Garnet didn't even know what a disgraced mother of pearl was so her future vision couldn't even detect the possible timelines 11 lived. Everything we had pointed to her death.”

 

“But I could have saved her! She could have been back with us after only a handful of years or sooner! You can't tell me that wouldn't have been better! That you wouldn't have wanted her back that quickly.” Steven snapped.

 

“Of course I wanted her back, Steven!” Tears finally fell from Connie's eyes, “I never fully processed losing her. She was my first mentor, and my friend. She understood me in ways I didn't even understand myself. My mother and her used to drink tea after training whenever Mom was available and I could see how much it relaxed Mom. You know my mom rarely had time to make friends when she was working, and there were even fewer who understood her. But 11 did. I always cherished that. And 11 unlocked a confidence in me I never imagined I could have. And she was the first one in my life I ever lost. Dadi Maheswaran hadn't even passed yet! Losing 11 was like losing a part of me, and I never fixed that. Never.”

 

They were quiet again after that.  Steven realized he'd never actually asked how Connie felt about losing Pearl. Everything had been so big, and he'd ran himself so ragged trying to hold on to hope and denial it had just, slipped his mind. 

I'm sorry.” Steven whispered, “I shouldn't have said that. I just…I was feeling all the what ifs and the could haves.” 

 

Steven sighed, “Being here, dealing with the Diamonds, makes me feel like some useless kid again. Plus I have all these feelings with Mom I just never even touched and I'm learning even more about her and then suddenly, someone so important to me who I thought was long gone is back.”

Connie nodded.

 

From the corner of the room someone cleared their voice. Connie and Steven turned and saw one of the pearls 11 had brought up to Pink's room. Rascal, Steven remembered she'd been called.

 

“Sorry,” the pearl awkwardly waved, “didn't mean to eavesdrop but also wasn't sure how to interrupt and then it was just awkward because it'd been so long and that made it even more awkward so I really didn't know how to interrupt then. Anyway, I just… look, when bad things happen it's easy to wish things had been better, and it's even easier to let maybes eat you alive. For a long time I followed a gem who wasn't who I'd convinced myself she was. Who treated me awfully and treated all her followers that way. When I broke away, I wasted a lot of time being sad and frustrated by gaining so many true friends and wonderful experiences because I kept thinking of how I could have had all these awesome things so much sooner, until one day I realized I was letting that rob me of fully enjoying the change. And when she died, I started wallowing in all the ways I maybe could have changed her mind and saved her until I realized all that was doing was distracting me from all the Gems who were still in my life.”

 

Rascal looked off at nothing and then back, “It's a lot easier said than done, but the past is the past. It's written, it's unchanging. There's no amount of wishing and hoping that can remedy it.  All you can do is focus on what you still have in the present, trying to avoid the same mistakes, making yourself proud, and making the ones important to you proud too. And hey, good news, you have a second chance! And Boss is already proud of you. I know she always hated the idea of all of you suffering the loss of her. I know she'd hate to know that pain lingers, but it doesn't have to. It's a part of grief, but it's really just that, a part of.”

 

Rascal shrugged and smiled, “At least that's my advice. Anyway, I'm here to collect some healing vials. How's it going? Oh it's… leaking from your body?”

 

Steven blinked a few times as Rascal skipped over and poked at the bottles like they might bite her. It was such a sudden shift in her whole demeanor Steven wasn't sure how to react.

He laughed, “I guess it kind of is? I'm not actually entirely sure how extraction works. From what I can tell it's pulling it from my sweat.”

Rascal picked up the bottle and continued to inspect it, “Sooooo it's pulled from your body and into this bottle that seems to have no sort of stasis field, but it doesn't return to unbound light after being out of contact with you.”

 

Steven blushed, "Y-yeah, I'm half human so my body is pretty organic and does that.”

Rascal nodded, “Right, but like this is more your Gem half right? And the other Diamond’s, er, I feel weird calling it essence since it isn't the same as what we more commonly call essence, but this stuff, it's also extracted from their bodies but stays solid.”

 

Steven thought about his visits to Yellow's sauna and Blue's pool leading up to the Grand Exhibition and realized Rascal was right. “Oh, you're correct. That…is pretty weird. I'm glad it's helpful at least.”

Connie asked, “If this isn't what you commonly call essence what is?”

 

Rascal held the bottle over her head to look at the bottom of it, “Cum, like the stuff that comes out of dicks.”

Connie and Steven both blushed vehemently.

Steven stuttered, “O-oh, that's, that is definitely not what this is.”

Rascal nodded and tapped on the bottle, “Yeah, that's why I felt weird calling it that.”

Steven nodded, “What should I call it instead?”

 

Rascal shrugged and looked back at them, “No idea, that's just the word us Gems use for both things, I never actually thought how weird it is until explaining it to you non-Gems.  Maaaaybe Diamond Juice?”

Connie chuckled a little, “It does kind of look like a sparkling juice.”

Steven smiled, “Diamond Juice it is. How many bottles do you need?”

 

Rascal looked at them all, “Well, 11 was only expecting like, three, although she said more is always appreciated. Soooo maybe I'll take six and leave the other two for you Crystal Gems? Doesn't hurt to be prepared.”

Steven agreed.

 

Rascal wasn't there for much longer, stashing the bottles in various places of her garments and then hopping to her feet and skipping away with a goodbye in a sing-song voice.

 

Connie and Steven chatted a bit longer until the eighth bottle was filled, keeping the topic light-hearted to avoid more tension. Steven knew they would need to talk about losing 11 more at some point, but he wasn't ready for that now, and Connie seemed to feel the same way.

 

The next few weeks Steven wore his normal clothes, distressed jeans, sandals, and various colors of t-shirt with the yellow star. Yellow and Blue both disapproved, but he just shrugged and insisted he wasn't his Mom so the other outfit didn't fit him after all. He started correcting them when they called him Pink Diamond too. It took some effort, but they both eventually went back to Steven and using he/him. 

 

The ball took a while to put together. For two weeks he wasn't even allowed out of Pink Diamond’s tower because everyone was still on high alert after the New Order’s operation at the Grand Exhibition. Yellow and Blue also didn't believe him at first that New Order was offering an opportunity for peace talks by minimizing their operations.

 

After a month they started to believe him more. He couldn't convince them to start peace talks still, but Yellow Diamond had grown to respect Connie when she was helping him propose the ceasefire and she accepted it until at least the ball since the New Order held up their end and restricted activities to extraction of defecting Gems only and one supply run.

 

There was still nothing from White. Steven kept kicking himself. He had been so thrown off by the weird greeting and intimidated by White Diamond he had hardly said more than a sentence. As the days kept going, the more he felt like he blew his chance.  He tried to ignore it though, focusing on the ball and convincing himself she’d be there.

 

Finally, the day was upon them.  There was one last, final snag.  Blue Diamond was refusing to let Garnet attend, insisting she unfuse and go as Sapphire and Ruby.  Garnet was willing, although not thrilled.  Steven had enough though.  Blue Diamond had been particularly dismissive of Garnet this entire time no matter how much he corrected her and insisted she was, in fact, the leader of the Crystal Gems, not him.  This was the last straw.

 

“I’ll be alright Garnet.  We’ve made so many concessions to them already, we have to hold ground certain places.  Like how I gave up wearing the Pink Diamond outfit and letting them call me Pink.  You’re Garnet, and that’s that.”

“Besides,” Amethyst picked her nose with the floating fingers of the limb enhancers, “me and Connie will be there so if things go tits up we can get him out. And if we can’t then you’ll be free to go to the New Order and get help to break us out.”

 

Garnet’s face remained neutral, but her hand went to her glasses, a tell-tale sign she was using Future Vision, “There are a handful of possibilities things go badly.  It is a sound idea to have one of us not in attendance to help the others.”

Connie smiled, “Then it’s settled.”

Garnet nodded, “Be careful, you three and… thank you.  I admit I’ve rather hit my limit with Blue Dimaond and her prejudice.”

Steven agreed and they headed out.

 

The ball was a failure.  White Diamond didn’t show up.  Instead, she took over Blue Diamond’s Pearl to make some announcements and say she is watching from afar.  On top of that it was boring.  Steven thought once they got past all of the protocols for all Gem’s attending to come up to the thrones and pay respects they’d actually get to have fun.  They didn’t.

 

Everything was scripted.  Everything was precise.  And there was no joy.  No true connections.  Gems were lined up in perfect rows by color and gem type not even looking at each other.  Certainly not socializing.  The Gems dancing didn’t even look at each other.

Blue and Yellow seemed pleased, although they had both balked a little when Connie had joined Steven on the throne at the beginning.  Steven sighed. Connie held his hand and pressed a kiss to his forehead.  Steven leaned in, she didn’t radiate intense warmth the way she used to before she was revived, but she wasn’t cold either.  It was always a comfort with her at his side.

 

She nuzzled in and whispered in a way he could hear her smile, “What do you say we shake things up and show these Gems how we dance on Earth, hm?”

Steven chuckled, “That would be very against the rules.”

Connie pulled back, her lip was curled into a grin on the right side and her eyes were shining, “Yes, it would.  But it’s your ball, the Steven Universe Ball. And right now it doesn’t feel like that at all.”

 

Steven smiled, he could never resist her when she was in her rebellious mood. “You are correct. As usual.”

Connie’s grin widened and she laughed as she stood and pulled him to the dance floor.  Steven laughed too, letting her take over.

 

He blushed as they went to the center of the floor and suddenly all eyes were on them.  Steven’s eyes darted around and he saw Connie blush a little too as she noticed.  Then Connie placed her hand on Steven’s cheek and they focused on just each other.

“Together,” Steven whispered, “as we should be.”

She nodded, “Together.”

 

They started with some ballroom dancing they’d learned when Connie first became obsessed with learning different styles of dancing, then they moved on to dances Dadi Maheswaran had taught them before she died, next moving to jazz, and then finally freestyling as they tripped over themselves and laughed even harder.  Steven completely forgot where they were.  Forgot all of the stress and expectations and uncertainties.  The universe at that moment was just Connie and him.

 

Except he got too relaxed and forgot to keep his powers in check.  One moment, Connie and Steven were two separate beings, the next, there was only Stevonnie.  

Gasps of scandal and a sharp, “What is the meaning of this!” from Yellow Diamond broke the spell.  

 

Then all hell broke loose.  Amethyst ditched her limb enhancers and stood next to Stevonnie, a pair of Jades fused, gleefully exclaiming how happy she wasn’t the only one. Stevonnie tried to placate the angry and disgusted Diamonds and deescalate the situation, but before they could even get a few words out Yellow Diamond poofed Amethyst and Jade and Blue Diamond scooped Stevonnie up, her grip firm and a little painful on their ribs.

 

The Diamonds stomped out of the ball and down several halls, lecturing Stevonnie the entire time.  They tried to argue, tried to calm the situation, but the Diamonds wouldn’t listen.  Stevonnie thought about fighting, but they were panicking.  They tried to unfuse, but they were too worried about being split up.  

 

The three reached a grey tower and Yellow threw open the door as Blue tossed Stevonnie inside hard enough they bounced a few times and were winded as they slammed against a curved wall.

“That was wildly inappropriate Pink!” Blue Diamond spat.

“Yes, now sit here and think about what you’ve done.” Yellow added and then slammed the door shut.

 

Stevonnie panted, the tower was dark, light barely entering the room through a single window, like a single outstretched vine that led to nowhere.  Stevonnie leaned against the wall and closed their eyes at first, but that just caused them to start hyperventilating, so they brought their knees up and nestled their head between their knees, counting to five as they inhaled and seven as they exhaled. Once their head stopped pounding and their breathing slowed they leaned against the wall again and looked up.

“Well,” they said to themselves, “I guess it’s good Garnet is still out there.”

 

They were left alone for over a week. They could feel their energy slowly draining from the lack of proper light without another source of energy like proper food and water. They had some snacks and water in the pack Connie kept on her at all times but they weren't sure how long they would be here so they were strictly rationing it, buying themselves as much time as they could. It helped that they didn't need food and water as much as most humans, although the more their Gem energy drained, the hungrier and thirstier they felt. 

 

Then Yellow Diamond came and announced Garnet and a handful of New Order rebels had been captured in an attempt to rescue them. Caught in a trap Yellow had set for them at a false location in this tower. They had been transferred to a facility under White Diamond’s control and would be “processed for information”. Stevonnie plead for Yellow to not hurt them, plead for her to listen. But Yellow Diamond wouldn't budge.

 

Stevonnie decided to stop playing diplomat then. They would fight and get out of this tower so they could rescue their family and allies. Except when they tried to soar up to the window and start breaking out they discovered they didn't have enough energy and instead fell apart.

 

Connie grunted as she hit the ground. She was more exhausted than she had been in a long time. She tried to stand but instantly felt dizzy and so instead scooted to the wall and leaned up against it. She tried to talk to Steven but her head felt too heavy. She thought she had just blinked but the next thing she knew it was nighttime, the small sliver of light from the window gone. Steven was cradling her and snoring softly, mumbling something incoherent sometimes. She sipped on the water and ate some of the granola bar. It had been so long since she had needed food and water she had forgotten how amazing it was to have after being deprived, and how viscous the gnawing hunger and thirst was when she could not completely satiate it.

 

When Steven woke up he said he had connected to one offspring of the watermelon people he'd accidentally made when he was a kid and hopefully had gotten a message to his dad, Lapis, and Peridot. She had him eat and they tried to rest to regain their strength while they waited for rescue.

Chapter 20: Waiting

Sickle paced the shared cell over and over. After the ball the Crystal Gems were silent, until Sapphire stumbled upon a New Order outpost three days later. She was badly injured and her gem cracked. Ruby was in her gem after taking a direct hit from Yellow Diamond while they were on the run. 11 used healing essence on Sapphire and told her Yellow’s attacks drained Gems to near depletion, making reformation take much longer, but she could fuse with Ruby while she was still in her gem due to their well-established bond and that would rejuvenate her faster, although Garnet would be low on energy for a day or two still.

 

Sickle was caught off guard when Garnet reformed and she openly wept and clutched at 11, she had only seen Garnet as balanced and betraying little emotion, more like herself really. Seeing this other side of her made her uncomfortable in an odd way. Not that she thought it was inappropriate, but in a way she knew she was watching someone she thought was more like herself expressing more emotions than she'd feel safe doing so publically. She knew it was a holdover from the Jackknife and her time on Homeworld with her abusive owner, but that didn't make the feeling less intense.

 

After a day, there was an exhaustive search to find out what had happened to Amethyst, Steven, and Connie. They found Amethyst first, she was in a bubble in Yellow Diamond’s throne room. A place impossible to get to since the war and the time 11’s shard had been stolen caused exponential security updates. Even getting information from Yellow Diamond’s sector was tricky without getting caught.

 

Jolt managed to dig up information on Steven and Connie, they had fused and Stevonnie had been thrown into the Twilight Tower. That was a facility they could breach.  11 took command on the rescue attempt, recruiting Sickle, Justice, Rascal, and Bismuth. Garnet joined them as well, agreeing to neutralize any orders since their gems would recognize her as a high-ranked sapphire. Everything had gone to plan getting to the tower and into the room their information said was where Steveonnie was located. Except it had been a trap. The room sealed and a suppression field brought them to their knees.

 

11 could have escaped using her Shadow powers, but she refused, instead she quickly changed out of her more identifiable clothes, wrapped her left eye, and stored her main weapons. Sickle pleaded with her to leave, but she had clasped her shoulders and said in Nacreous, “I can never leave my comrades behind, besides, this is an opportunity to infiltrate White’s sector. Together we thrive, together we rise.” 

 

Sickle fought tears as she thought of that moment again. Shortly after that, they came and collared the non-pearls. They identified 11 as being formerly Pink Diamond’s pearl and took her away for questions. They ended up collaring the remaining mother of pearls before putting them in the cell as well, for added security.

 

It had now been three days in White’s high security prison and they had been mostly left alone with no sign of where 11 was. The only things keeping Sickle sane were she managed to stash a small, in-ear communicator so she was in contact with Jolt and the rest of the New Order, and that she had two fellow mothers to speak to in Nacreous when stress got the best of her.

 

“How long do we wait?” Bismuth asked, not for the first time.

“I do not know,” Sickle replied, “I just know I will honor 11’s wish to use this as an opportunity.”

“What if they’re just torturing her?” Bismuth growled, “Or what if they’ve shattered her! And we’re just sitting here!”

Sickle snarled, “They could never shatter her, not anymore, not again. If 11 was truly at risk she would use her Shadow powers to end this and come for us. We stick to plan.”

Bismuth flinched, “A-again?”

 

Sickle felt bad then, she hadn’t thought about how alarming that would sound to 11’s old friends. “When she hybridized, her pearl and Shadow’s crystal shattered, and then all of the shards came back together for her to reform. She’s much harder to force into her gem and her gem rarely cracks now.”

Bismuth shook her head,“No, no, this is too risky, we can’t lose her again. I can’t lose her again!”

Sickle fought tears of her own seeing the blacksmith start to cry, seeing how deeply worried she was about 11, “Have trust Bismuth, 11 knows what she’s doing, she’s a tough Gem, and she is over wanting to martyr herself, she wants to live.”

“Garnet?” Bismuth asked.

Garnet grunted, “Sickle is right, 11 would use Shadow powers if things were too dire. I can’t see what other path we’re on, but we are not on that path at least.”

 

A loud clang as the door at the end of the hall opened and slid shut again stopped the argument.  There were two sets of stomping footsteps heading their way and a protesting voice that yelled, “Now what? You know I can fucking walk on my own right, I’m short but my legs work just fine.”

Garnet shot to her feet, “Amethyst!”

 

When the quartz guards came into view, Sickle saw they were holding a small Amethyst wearing shorts with stars and a black sleeveless. She vaguely recognized her from their brief meeting in Pink Diamond’s room and realized this must be the Crystal Gem Amethyst, which meant they had pulled her out of the bubble from Yellow Diamond’s room. Sickle noted they had also collared her, but there weren’t any marks of damage.

 

Everyone in the cell hissed as they were ordered to their knees and the collars all went off, it felt similar to a low powered destablilzer burst. Sickle, Rascal, and Justice all agreed at that level they could easily fight it since they were used to being hit with a destabilizer, but chose to pretend it stopped them for now until they could ascertain what was happening to 11, and formulate a clear escape. It still made Sickle’s head swim. Reminded her she was in a cage, again. She hated being in so many cages.

 

Thinking about being trapped muddled her understanding of Common as Amethyst was tossed in, and the guards turned the field at the front of their cell back on before stomping off. As Amethyst reunited with Garnet and Bismuth, Justice came over and soothed her. Sickle thanked her, the fury and hatred towards their treatment had bonded them together long ago, and now it was a much needed anchor.

 

Common became clearer to her once more, and Sickle realized her gem had actually overheated a little now that it was cooling. The more it cooled, the more she understood. This was not the first time she had noticed the correlation. It made sense, she had long known trauma and stress had caused her issue with the language in the first place, as it had a handful of others too, so of course, even as she began to work through the block, high levels of stress would cause a relapse. Since their gems were in some ways like their main computers, overheating causing performance issues made sense as well. 

 

Knowing all that and reminding herself of it at the moment didn’t make her feel less agitated though. Justice sensed this and remained nearby as Sickle walked over to Amethyst.

“Did you see 11?”

Amethyst shook her head, “Nope, didn’t even know she was in here, too.”

Sickle’s fear spiked, but she bottled it, forcing herself into a state more like her Jackknife days, a skill she both appreciated and despised she had.

 

“Why did they take you out of the bubble? Did they torture you?” Sickle asked.

Amethyst shrugged, “If you consider this fucking collar and so many unnecessary comments about my height torture, then I guess. Really all they did was slap this stupid thing around my neck and then asked me what happened to Pink Diamond.”

Everyone glanced at each other.

 

Bismuth put her hand to her chin, “That could be what they’re doing with 11 as well. The Diamonds haven’t been particularly sincere about accepting that Steven isn’t his mother, and they would still see 11 as Pink Diamond's pearl.”

Garnet touched her glasses,“Yes, I am seeing a likely path there. White Diamond especially has seen Steven only as Pink Diamond ‘playing a game.’ After fusing with Connie at the ball, maybe she thinks it’s time to ‘end the game.’ So she’s trying to figure out how to make Steven Pink Diamond again.”

 

“That is not possible, correct?” Sickle asked.

“As far as we know,” Garnet answered.

“There hasn’t exactly been anyone else like Steven since he’s a hybrid,” Bismuth added, “he is definitely his own person, with his own memories, personality, and life, but none of us knows what happens when he dies, or if he even can die.”

Sickle frowned, “So he is likely in grave danger.”

 

Everyone went quiet as the door at the end of the hall slid open and then slammed shut again. Sickle heard only one set of stomping footsteps, which was odd, especially since it wasn't time for the normal patrol and there were usually two or three quartzes at a time. Relief instantly washed over Sickle as she saw 11 trailing slightly behind the quartz guard in a standard pearl position, her quiet footsteps completely inaudible with the stomps of the quartz. She noted they hadn't collared 11, which was interesting since they had done so with herself and the other two mothers despite being able to already give them orders. She also noted that 11’s form had no visible damage.

 

The quartz ordered them all on their knees again, turned off the energy shield at the front of the cell, shoved 11 inside, turned the energy field back on, and left.

Well,” 11 sighed, “this is an unmitigated disaster.”

Garnet shrugged, “If it’s any consolation, there are actually two even worse timelines.”

11 smirked, “I suppose it’s something.”

 

“Hey,” the quartz grunted as she suddenly came back and pointed at 11, “you, come here again, that’s an order.”

Sickle saw 11 huff.  11 could technically fight the order due to the slight immunity her Shadow powers gave her, but she put on a vacant pearl smile and complied. Probably saving that trick for when they actually escaped.

 

Once 11 was back in the hall, with everyone on their knees and the energy field up again, the quartz pointed to 11’s prosthetic, “That arm, give it. Can’t have you using it to break out.”  

11 sighed, powered down her arm and then disconnected it and handed it over.  The quartz ended up demanding her liner and sleeve as well, suspicious she had something hidden in it.

 

Sickle suppressed a grin when 11 asked, “By the way, are we allowed to sing? It’s comforting to us.”

The quartz snarled and roughly grabbed 11’s jaw, “I don’t remember giving you permission to speak, pearlie.”

11’s uncovered eye twitched but she managed to not react any more than that.

“Hey, get your hands off her, you asshole!” Amethyst shouted from the cell.

 

The quartz glared at Amethyst for a moment and pushed a button on the cell wall so sound from inside couldn’t be heard, then returned her attention to 11. All the mothers shot to their feet without a second thought to the low destabilizing pulse that was supposed to be immobilizing them as the quartz loosened her grip and began caressing 11’s jaw and neck. The quartz froze, alarmed at their resistance. 11 covertly signed at them to go back down, and they did, making the quartz relaxed again. A smug grin sprawled on the quartzes face, and then she bit her bottom lip as her fingers and eyes traveled down 11’s neck, resting at the center of 11’s chest.  

 

Sickle seethed as she saw 11’s gaze become distant, and her shoulders slump, signs she had partially disconnected from her body and shut down a little.

The quartz drew her finger across 11’s collar bone,“I suppose it is only fair.  You pearls are made for singing after all. And looking good.  You know,” the quartz cupped 11’s cheek again and placed her thumb on 11’s mouth, threatening to push it in, “you’re not as fiery as I was expecting.  Maybe you were just waiting for the right Gem to come around and tame you, the so-called Renegade. I bet that's it, just going from one master to another.”

 

Sickle snarled, and she saw the hint of Shadow powers from Justice as her rage flared. 11's eye became sharp again and narrowed, “You’re not the first to say something like that.”

The quartz’s eyes shone with that hunger the mothers were still all too familiar as she moved her hand down to caress 11’s neck, “Oh yeah?”

Rage flared around 11 ever so slightly, not visible, but the pressure unmistakable.  11 smiled too wide as she replied in a lilted tone, “Yes, but with any luck, you’ll be the last.”

 

The quartz jerked back, no doubt feeling the danger of 11’s Shadow power.

The quartz took a moment and then thumbed her own nose. “Whatever, now get back into your cell.”

11 continued to glare at the quartz while keeping the unsettling smile. 

Justice signed a warning, “She's hungry.”

 

Sickle remained on alert, unsure how one of them could become an anchor for 11 if the quartz continued to push and triggered the hunger even more. She replayed recent days in her mind to remember when she had last seen 11 eat or sleep, it had been a while. Too long, if the hunger got the best of her, it would be difficult to control.

 

Thankfully, the quartz couldn’t bear to look at 11 anymore, staring anywhere else she could as she lowered the field to let 11 back into the cell. This was good, the lack of eye contact allowed 11 to bottle Rage again, and Sickle didn't feel any pressure anymore. She glanced at Justice and she gave the all good sign. The quartz told them to get comfortable and await their trial, telling them they were lucky it was high priority so it would be only thirteen years before it happened. Then she secured the prison cell once more and stomped off, trying to laugh to taunt them, but it was too fast and high and only betrayed she was still nervous.

 

11 dropped her smile and huffed as she shook off the unwanted touch.

"Cunt," Sickle snarled as she watched the quartz turn the corner, and then she turned to 11 and inspected her jaw, "did she hurt you? Crack your jaw?"

11 shook her head, "I'm fine, just a typical power-hungry quartz."

Bismuth came over and 11 hugged her tightly.

 

“Did they rape you or torture you?” Sickle’s voice shook a little as she asked.

11 placed a hand on Sickle’s shoulder, “They just asked me questions, dear friend. I played the role of a docile and obedient pearl and they fell for it. There was some chatter of rape but they dared not risk it with White's Zircon checking in frequently.”

 

“What the fuck, that's still really fucked up Pierogi.” Amethyst said.

11 went over to Amethyst, sitting down and putting her arm around her, no doubt needing that safety of a trusted quartz after the encounters with hungry and abusive ones, “It is, although I have grown used to it. I suppose that doesn't exactly make it better.”

"Are," Amethyst gulped and squeezed 11's hand, "are most quartzes like that?"

 

Sickle saw the slight blush as Amethyst asked the question, worry and self-consciousness blending together in her eyebrows, her hunched shoulders, and the way her eyes wouldn't leave the floor.

11 assured her,"Thankfully, no. Most are honorable and trustworthy, and several are even more like you, completely good-natured and at least respectful in a way that acknowledges pearls are sentient. Unfortunately, the quartzes that are like her, the ones that lean towards cruelty and crave that power over others, are the ones who tend to be put in charge and rewarded the most.  In The Jackknife, only quartzes even worse than her were selected to keep us in line, too. So it is very nice to be able to be around you again."

 

Amethyst seemed relieved, but her brow still furrowed as she processed the information.

Garnet, after a beat, said, “Well, now there’s only one worse timeline.”

11 chuckled, “So it still could be worse, hm?”

 

Amethyst was still staring at where the quartz left.  She looked like she was going to ask something, but the sound of the door sliding shut at the end of the hall made her recoil. She walked over to the corner of the cell. Sickle was glad to finally hear the door, her hands had remained balled fists at her side, worried the quartz's wounded pride would cause her to be rash and return to actually go through with her threat of “taming the Renegade.”

 

Sickle knelt next to 11 and put her hand to 11’s jaw as if she was inspecting it again.

11 said in Nacreous, “Do not worry, dear friend, she really did just piss me off far more than she hurt me.”

Sickle nodded, and then pressed her forehead to 11’s gem and whispered, “I figured as much, but I wanted to be sure the guard was fully gone and give you some comfort anyway.”

 

Then Sickle nimbly slid the small communicator into 11’s ear.  11 beamed from ear-to-ear as Sickle pulled away with a smirk. 11 clasped Sickle's shoulder and said, “Excellent job, my second-in-command.”

 

Sickle switched to Common,“What did they want from you? Did they ask about returning Pink Diamond of you as well?”

11 nodded, “Yes, I take it that's why they unbubbled you, Amethyst?”

Amethyst confirmed.

 

11 cursed, “I wish I'd been able to find Stevonnie’s true location. I worry White Diamond will eventually take much more drastic action. Thankfully, since they decided to not collar me and don't know about my hybridization, I was able to lie some. I was honest that Pink is long gone, as is Rose. I lied about my own identity as leader of the New Order though, and said that I had simply been following orders to rebel before. Thankfully my trial was sealed so they couldn't exactly verify any of that.”

 

Sickle felt relief wash over her, “Good, less threat to your safety. What is the plan from here?”

11 went to rub her palm with her thumb, an old self-soothing technique from Jackknife days. 11 looked down in confusion and huffed as she saw the lack of limb and prosthetic. Sickle began rubbing the circles into her palm for her, an agreement they came to long ago in the pod after White Moissanite when she'd lost function of her left arm.

 

11 thanked her, “It's not ideal, but we'll hold position here until we can get Stevonnie's location, unless that takes longer than two weeks. I'm not willing to keep us trapped longer than that and risk the quartzes getting bored. Especially since their plan for us from here seems to be wait until the trial which is years off. Eventually, White Zircon will visit less, and the quartzes will try to rape us mothers. I'm guessing you've had Jolt get us the layout of this facility and schematic for the security hardware of this room?”

Sickle replied, “She is in progress on layout, but the security hardware thingie she has.”

 

11 paused, “Hm, I at least know how to get to the security room where our weapons and other items are kept. We could probably access the layout from there too in a pinch. Any idea on getting the collars off?”

Sickle pointed to Garnet, “Electrical overload.”

11 smiled, “Oh that's right, they won't expect you to have that power. Alright, I'm going to check in with Jolt and see what's happening on the outside.”

 

As 11 got up-to-date on the New Order, Sickle kept helping 11 soothe by rubbing circles into 11's palm until 11 gently squeezed her hand, indicating she was good for now. Then Sickle stood and stared at the hall, stared at their way towards freedom. It wouldn't be easy holding position in this cage. She knew it was necessary, but that didn't mean she wouldn't hate every second of it.

 

Justice came back over and signed, “How are you holding up?”

Sickle whispered in Nacreous, “I am tired of confinement, of unfairly being trapped in cages meant to demean and degrade us. I have tasted freedom, and like when 11 first joined us in The Jackknife, that freedom makes oppression taste that much more bitter, even if I know it to be temporary.”

Justice nodded, “Keep the fire of that rage going my friend, we will need it when we escape.”

Sickle relaxed, “Yes, when, because it is not an if.”

Chapter 21: The Announcement

The days passed slowly, but being able to sing brought Sickle comfort. Getting the layout of the prison was proving near impossible. After a week and a half they had the guard rotation well memorized and started planning their escape, deciding to get the layout from the security room. If Jolt got the layout in the next few days, they'd replan.

 

Sickle felt much better once the plan was solidified. Especially since the plan included 11 anchoring to her and feeding to recharge and force a good portion of the guards into their gems. That would clear the fighting before they could reclaim their weapons, and help 11 maintain her energy balance. The Crystal Gems could bubble and send all of the guards away once 11 had forced them in their gems as well, and they could summon their weapons if 11 started to lose control and had to stop using her powers.

 

Sickle had tried to convince 11 to sneak food out of her gem and eat but it was too risky. She did at least manage to help 11 sleep a little, especially since she had a few bouts of phantom limb pain without access to her prosthetic, and that had clearly worn her out. At first Sickle let 11 redo her hair, keeping to a simple three stranded braid 11 could do with one hand and her chin. Then Sickle wrapped around 11 like they used to do in the pod on Moissanite assignments and sang the soothing song until 11 drifted off. She caught Bismuth smiling at them more than once, and she quietly thanked Sickle for taking care of 11 once she was asleep. Sickle had simply responded, “Together we thrive, together we rise.”

 

Two days before they planned to escape, 11 received an emergency transmission from Jolt. White Diamond had sent troops to hit one of The New Order’s strongholds. Thankfully they had good enough intel everyone escaped and most of the supplies went with them, but the building itself was leveled and some supplies lost. More importantly though, the ceasefire had been broken. There were signs this was only the first attack as well.

 

“Wait time is over,” 11 said, “Crystal Gems, we're leaving, I assume you'll want to go with me. When I get to the security room I intend to declare a full planet response from the New Order. The Twilight Tower will be one of my main targets. If you want, Rascal can escort you to Pink Diamond’s ship and we can bring Stevonnie after rescue so you can return to Earth. Or, you can fight by our side. I will warn you, I intend to end this war today if we can.”

 

Sickle smiled, “Time to be fucking loud then, Boss?”

11 grinned, “Time to be fucking loud, dear friend.

Rascal squealed, “Oooooo, this is going to be so much fun!”

Justice signed, “It's war, not a sleepover Rascal,” then she smirked, “but yes, it will be fun.”

 

Garnet walked up to 11 and removed her glasses, then rested her hand on 11's shoulder, “A long time ago, when I was brand new and didn’t even know who I was, your blades and determination protected me, and that day you helped me discover I was a Gem that would never abandon a friend. You have protected me many times since, and I know who I am now, and I still know I am not a Gem who abandons a friend. The Crystal Gems are by your side.”

11 gently grasped one of Garnet’s gemmed hands, “Thank you old friend, and hey, now you’re used to not being ruby height.”

 

Garnet chuckled, “I'm never going to live that down, am I?”

Bismuth came over and rested one arm on Garnet, and the other on 11, “Absolutely never, this will be a blast from the past huh? Sticking it to Homeworld, fighting side by side.”

 

11 blushed as she nodded and her smile widened as she looked at Bismuth. Sickle recognized it as her look of adoration after witnessing that same look often when 11 looked at Doc. Rascal came up next to Sickle and whispered in Nacreous, “Aren't they so cute?”

Justice signed, “Doctor is going to be so happy when she gets to actually meet Bismuth and see how much she adores 11.”

Sickle signed in response, “And how much 11 adores Bismuth.”

“Do you think they've fucked yet since reuniting?” Justice signed.

 

Sickle felt her cheeks involuntarily turn bright pink, the blush spreading only further as she realized 11 was looking at them now.

11 signed, “Really, that’s what you're all wondering right now?” The exasperation on her face and more emphatic movement for the that's sign driving home her disbelief.

Rascal spoke in Common, “Justice started it, Sickle and I were just talking about how much you and Biz clearly adore each other when -” 

Sickle felt her shoulders blush now too as she hissed, “Not out loud in Common!”

Rascal stopped her sentence with a high-pitched “eep.”

Justice shook her head and pinched the bridge of her nose.

 

Bismuth blushed now. 

11 also pinched the bridge of her nose, speaking in Common as well, “Anyways! Jolt is moving into position to meet us near security so she can get the layout and we can send a message to The New Order. Once she lets me know she's there, we'll start singing to cover the noise. Rascal and Justice, I'll give you each one of my swords. I don't intend for you to have to fight before the security room and I know it's been a while since you’ve used a sword, but better than nothing. I want you to save Shadow powers for later Justice. Sickle, you just focus on being my anchor.”

 

They all nodded. Sickle calmed her nerves, preparing herself to be tethered to 11 when using her Shadow powers. She figured Rage would be the main one 11 would pull her powers from, but Fear would likely be close to the surface. That would be fine though, Sickle had anchored for 11 like this before, when she was still getting a handle on safely using her Shadow powers, and Rage was always the one Sickle did the best with. 11 also had much better control now.

 

The wait was short but felt longer than recent days. The promise of freedom so close and yet out of reach gnawed at Sickle. She was angry, and a little scared they would somehow fail. That would be fine, too. It worked better when the emotions of the anchor matched 11’s. That was likely one of the main reasons why 11 had chosen her over Rascal.

 

Finally, 11 received the signal from Jolt.

 

There was a patrol due soon so they waited for that, warming up with a simple song they'd often sing to pass the time, and so the guards would have less suspicion when they started their louder song. After the two quartzes came and went, it was time.

 

The Crystal Gems moved to the very back of the room. Rascal and Justice paired off near the Crystal Gems, and Sickle and 11 paired off near the front of the cell. They would move all around the cell as the song went so 11 could damage key mechanisms with her Shadow power, but they needed to start here for the tethering process, so Justice could be a barrier between the other Gems and 11 if the tethering went wrong.

 

11 started the song, a solo in both voice and dance, Sickle would join once she saw a Shadow chain crossed around 11’s torso and the end of the chain in her hand, outstretched for Sickle to take. Once they were successfully tethered, Rascal and Justice would join.

 

11 had picked the song, since she needed to get into the right mental and emotional state. She had chosen well. It was a song about how as pearls, especially disgraced mothers, were held back, their souls unfairly judged, constantly on trial by Homeworld and trying to snuff out their individuality. As 11 sang, “Put on trial, trying to bleach me out, on trial,” the chain formed.

Sickle accepted the chain from 11 and joined the song. It coiled around her wrist and forearm and as it did, she felt Rage, not just her pressure exuded from 11, but within her now, joined with her own feelings, her own rage. Sickle fully clasped the chain, wrapped it around her waist, and then held the remaining slack with both hands.

 

Sickle's left eye began seeing life energy as 11's did, except it was fuzzy and unclear. When 11 removed the cloth from her own eye though, it all sharpened, and Hunger made their stomachs lurch and their chests heave. 

 

Anticipation.

 

Fear pressed at the base of their skulls but they soothed her and let Rage begin to burn their chests. Their shared pain, their shared thirst for freedom, their shared desire to destroy the crooked system that had tormented and oppressed them swirled around and the Shadow chain solidified.

 

United, fused, and tethered 11/Sickle/Rage sang, “On trial, but wait until our song bursts out!”

 

Rascal and Justice joined then, Justice signing and whispering the lyrics, pushing her voice because it was important to her to sing with all of her form in that moment. They all began stomping, and their singing changed more to a shout.

 

“Oh so we're heretics now, damned from grace, constantly on trial, but wait until our song bursts out!”

 

The lyrics paused and they hummed instead as they changed spaces, and continued to stomp and clap. A quiet moment before they all began to lament. Their souls were truly light years away, at home, in peace, in love, in Haven, but they were tired, and they had enough. They all shouted "Enough!” and as they did, two Shadow arms sprung from 11's back, they phased through the wall and strategically damaged certain components, a technique 11 had mastered through the war as she used her Shadow powers while hiding it.

 

They continued, “You can't tell me to regret, this fire that I've kept, I'll build it to unrest, yes, fire won't forget!”

 

Another pass of 11's Shadow hands on the other wall punctuated this lyric. They continued all together repeating the chorus and verse. Garnet removed their collars as they passed, and then removed her own, plus Bismuth's and Amethyst's. Once Rascal was behind Justice near the Crystal Gems again and the only thing left was one more pass and the loudest part. 11 made the last swipe with her Shadow arms. Rascal and 11 chanted how they had been chained and shackled but no longer, they were breaking free as Sickle and Justice hummed, Justice's voice fading to a growl and giving out again near the end. 

 

Then Sickle’s head and arms flopped as she was momentarily overwhelmed by Rage because 11 transformed. Everything went dark to her, and there was a loud ringing replaced by a screech and horrendous scraping of metal on metal. Sickle snapped back to clarity and grabbed the slack of the chain again. 11 was fully in Rage mode now, her skin a mixture of dark greys and her usual off-white, with blue growing crystals protruding from her spine, shoulders, and elbow like talons and horns. Her teeth were fangs, and her breaths were haggard and wheezing. Her eyes were glowing shades of deep blue and teal on black scleras, the Y-shaped scar around her left eye glowed as well. 

 

The prison door was also gone. 11 had blown out the frame holding the emitters completely off with a screech, the break as clean as it could be and without tripping alarms after what had been disconnected during the song.

 

11 and Sickle led the way.  11 easily ate the guards on patrol to the point they just lost their form without any issues. Justice and Rascal with a sword each guarded Sickle’s back and Amethyst and Bismuth bubbled the two quartzes and sent them away.

 

 As they moved into a more main hall, there were six quartzes in a cluster and one further down the hall. The one down the hall was on the edge of the range for the level of attack 11 was using, but she fell to her knees with the rest as 11 began to feed on their energy with a raspy inhale. Sickle recognized the farther quartz as the one who had molested 11 when she put her in the cell. This quartz managed to flee out of range and scrambled to sound the alarm. 11 wasn’t able to extend her range of attack enough before the alarm was activated. That was fine though, they knew they wouldn’t make it all the way to security without raising the alarm anyways. 

 

11 focused on eating the quartzes in range so it was done properly without completely eating their souls. Then there was just the one quartz. She tripped backwards in fear and started sputtering. 11/Sickle/Rage realized the quartz was trying to issue orders and a Shadow arm sprang from 11’s back and crushed the quartz’s mouth shut, raising her in the air so her feet weren’t touching the ground.

 

“I don’t remember giving you permission to speak,” 11, her voice completely distorted by Rage, taunted, and then she crushed the quartz's head to force her into her gem. Hunger surged through 11 and Rage and Sickle had to dig her heels in and pull the chain taut as 11 went to eat that quartz’s soul. The pulling of the chain snapped 11’s attention to Sickle. A flurry of emotions whirled through them. Both of them honestly wanted that quartz dead, triggered by her cruelty and how it mirrored so much abusive treatment they had both received, and the knowledge that if the quartz thought she could have, she absolutely would have raped and tortured 11 like so many Gems had before. But Sickle focused on reason, she knew 11 held herself at a standard when it came to eating souls and shattering enemies and this was not it. This gem was not a current active and deadly threat.

 

Hunger became a dull feeling in Rage and 11 again and Sickle allowed slack in the chain once more.  She realized Justice was holding the Crystal Gems back from retrieving the quartz gems. They couldn’t have known what was transpiring between 11 and Sickle at that moment and how easily Hunger could have transferred to them. That would have been untethering to 11, if she accidentally began feeding on one of her friends. It was under control though, 11/Sickle confirmed in themselves.

 

As Garnet bubbled the farther quartz 11/Sickle closed their eyes and refocused Rage. It wasn't much further to the Security Room. There were twelve other quartzes on the way but 11 fed on their energy without further issue. 

 

As they turned the corner onto the security room hall, they say fifteen more quartz blocking the way with their bodies.

“Alright little pearlies and whatever the fuck of an abomination you are, you've had your fun. Now it's time to behave,” an agate taunted as the quartzes rotated to let her through.

“Or what?” 11/Sickle/Rage snarled.

The agate laughed and then growled, “Or I'll let this entire outpost use you pearls for stress relief and make those sniveling, weak-hearted Crystal Gems watch.”

 

11/Sickle/Rage felt Jolt in the ceiling slowly unleashing her power and grinned, “Proposal denied, how about instead I eat your energy until you can't sustain your hardlight forms and you're bubbled and sent away? Oh and don't worry, I'll make sure to be careful so I don't eat your soul in the process.”

 

The quartzes looked a little uneasy, but the agate rolled her eyes and started walking away, “Take care of these prisoners, once they're secure you may begin using the pearls.”

Then Jolt cut the lights, and for a moment there was only the glow of 11's eyes and crystal like protrusion.

 

The quartzes in the back of the formation started screaming as Jolt began taking them out. The rest scrambled to illuminate their gems for light but 11/Rage began to feed. The quartzes continued to scream, being fed on wasn't painful, although certainly an odd sensation, but their panic spiked as they felt powerless while their energy was being sucked away. Sickle felt Hunger creeping up again, not overwhelming, but waiting to pounce, excited by all of the strong fear. So Sickle lowered her stance and wrapped the slack of the tethering chain around her hands, ready to snap it taut at a moment's notice. 

 

Once the last quartz was forced to her gem, 11 surprised Sickle and returned to her standard form, completely containing Rage and her Shadow powers. Sickle let go of the tether, sensing 11 was done using her powers for the moment through their connection.

 

When the lights turned back on, the agate was cowering, just a shivering mess crouched low to the ground and with her hands covering her ears and surrounding by the gems of her fallen quartzes. Jolt was nearby behind her. 

 

The agate shot up with a blush, trying, and failing, to stop her trembling. 

Her voice wavered and pitched up as she screeched, “You’re just a pearl, too? What the fuck are you freaks?!”

Jolt silently crept up behind her, resting one hand on her shoulder while easily slipping a dagger between the agate’s ribs, “You said it yourself, we're ‘just’ pearls, and we're tired of shit heels like you.”

 

Then Jolt twisted the dagger and the agate lost her form. Justice tossed the sword to 11 as she ran past and tackled Jolt, almost knocking her to the ground. The two giggled and kissed. Jolt asked if they hurt her and when she shook her head no Jolt asked a follow-up question of if she hurt them and Justice signed with a grin, “Not yet, but soon.”

 

11 collected her other sword from Rascal and stored them, then pulled her shirt back up. The Crystal Gems bubble all of the quartzes and the agate. Jolt excitedly greeted them but 11 drew her attention to the security room door. Jolt easily opened it with her Shadow powers and then wrapped her chest back up. They all entered the security room, there was a single quartz and the labradorite on watch duty. Jolt and 11 quickly took them out. Then Jolt used her powers to lock the door so only she could open it again.

 

Sickle rushed over to the far corner of the room where their weapons were piled up. Rascal cartwheeled over as well, picking up her hammer and hugging and kissing it. Justice grabbed her brass knuckles and transformed them to claws and inspected them. Sickle transformed her sickle first, inspecting it for damage and pleased to find none, then she checked her scythe and cursed as it didn't completely fold out. It looked like someone had tried to open it using brute force and overdid it.

 

“I can fix that in like five minutes and with something hot if you'd like,” Bismuth offered.

“Please,” Sickle confirmed and handed her the weapon. It felt weird to do, giving up her weapon willingly, even though she trusted Bismuth so far.

Garnet unfused and Ruby heated a plate Bismuth brought out.

“My arm in that pile?” 11 asked as she came over, she also added in Nacreous, “and how are you? Not too drained?”

 

Sickle responded, “I don't see your arm. And you did good, I could probably even tether for you again although a nap later would still be ideal.”

11 nodded, “We'll try to get you that,” she switched back to Common, “Jolt, can you sense my arm in the room?”

 

Jolt unwrapped her chest a little and her eyes glowed, “Locker to your left,” she lifted her hand towards the locker and it opened. Then she wrapped her chest back up. Jolt went to the console and created a secure way to message all of The New Order at once as 11 had requested when they made the plan.

 

Rascal was nervous and asked if it was okay to sing. 11 allowed it, stating to be ready to pause for the recording. Jolt joined Rascal and brought out her travel drum, made with tech so it sounded like a hand drum but had a much smaller profile. They picked a song they made recently, a way to focus before a tough mission.

 

Rascal started the song and Jolt played on her drum. It started with how they had been away from home for so long, first they had been kept from making a true home in prison, and now here, staring down foes that sought to enslave them again. While she sang, Sickle put her armor in place over her thighs, and reattached the rest of her gear. She double checked her sickle, Bismuth still worked on her scythe. 

 

11 reconnected her arm and changed back into her outfit as the leader of New Order, and put in place a few hidden knives she liked to keep that she had stored before their capture. Sickle watched 11's face closely as she placed her helmet on the console. She was determined, and there were no signs of losing control. Sickle let herself relax and closed her eyes to take in the song more.

 

Rascal sang that she had been hunted before, had been threatened, had suffered before, but now she was the hunter, she was the threat, she was the one who refused to accept more suffering now. Sickle opened her eyes again and stared at the Era 3 flag honoring the three Diamonds on the wall that would be visible in 11’s message. Sickle gestured to it with her head to 11 and then brought out some spray paint from her satchel that she often used when she caused riots with Justice through music and art. 11 nodded and drew a sword, slashing the flag so most of it fell but some would still be visible in the message.

 

Rascal continued to sing as Sickle painted the symbol of the New Order where the flag had been. 11 walked to the console and placed her hand on her helmet, closing her eyes and focusing. Once Sickle was done Rascal came to the chorus again, except instead of I, all the mothers joined in, singing in unison that they were the ones who hunted now, they were the threat, they were the ones who thrived, they were the ones who refused to accept more suffering, and they refused to let any more of them die.

 

Then 11 signed for the song to pause and put her helmet on. Everyone went quiet and made sure they wouldn't be in the background.

11 opened the channel and started her speech, “Members of the New Order, we offered a chance for a peaceful solution, a ceasefire to show we were open for negotiations. The Diamonds have responded by imprisoning our mediator and the other Crystal Gems, and even myself. Now, they've even gone so far as to attack one of our bases here on Homeworld, with plans for more attacks.”

 

Then 11 did something that surprised them all, she took off her helmet, keeping her left eye closed, “No more. We must draw a line in the sand and create a unified response to their threat. That is why I reveal myself to you now. Because I want you to know exactly who you are following into this fight. I am a pearl, I once belonged to Pink Diamond, I rebelled on Earth and became a Crystal Gem. I was captured by Homeworld long after the war for Earth, put on trial, and sentenced to become a dishonored mother of pearl at a facility known as the Jackknife. I, with all the mothers of the Jackknife, overthrew our wardens there, including the Chrysoberyl in charge, reduced that facility to nothing but heaps of metal and tech at the bottom of the ocean, and escaped so we could start a new life, a free life.”

 

Sickle found her mouth betraying her, her lips spread into a wide grin, unable to contain her pride. She'd always understood the need to hide 11's identity, but she also liked seeing her open and free. The recounting of their past feats was certainly a source of pride as well.

 

11 continued, “The New Order is and will continue to be the way we build that free life for all of us. Today and for the foreseeable future, Homeworld is threatening that freedom. But it isn't all of Homeworld, as we see from the growth of our rebellion, there are many who stand with us, and many more who want to join. A few Gems hold the most power: The Diamonds. And they have accomplished many things, but it is at the expense of too many of us, and a demand for us to give up our individuality, and at the expense of all other life around us. No more. We're ending this now. Execute Operation Cloudfall. Cut off their power, dull their shine, and make the Diamonds fall. Their order is not our order.” 

 

11 cut the feed. Rascal started loudly cheering and doing flips. 11 gently told her to calm herself and focus before looking at the Crystal Gems.

“Alright, time to start moving. No doubt reinforcements are on their way. We’ll get out of the facility, rescue Stevonnie, and go from there. Crystal Gems, just so you know, Operation Cloudfall is an all-out assault on Homeworld. We will have some of our spacefleet come into the atmosphere, we’ll also launch non-spacefaring aircraft, and New Order rebels will flood the streets near the Diamonds’ thrones from tunnels we recently completed. The point is to show just how many of us there are, to fill the skies and give Gems a more tangible grasp of just how big our operation is and how much power we have so the Diamonds don’t look so absolute. On top of that, we will use the global transmitter core we stole at the Grand Exhibition to broadcast a message across Homeworld and every colony with a speech I prerecorded encouraging more Gems to join and take a stand, as well as testimonials from New Order members, both our fighters, and those living peacefully in the colonies we’ve emancipated.” 

 

Garnet nodded and grinned, “Quite a plan. I forgot how good of a strategist you are. Seems like you’ve leveled up even more since I last saw you. We’re in.”

“Fuck yeah! Let’s get ‘em!” Amethyst whooped.

11 smiled, “Glad to have you here.”

 

11 went to put her helmet back on, but then paused, stored it in her gem, and pulled out the spear that was a replica of her Gem weapon.

Sickle felt pride well up in her again and another smile on her face. She walked over to 11 and spoke in Nacreous, “It is good to see you old friend, the real you, in this fight. Now let us claim victory for all of our comrades no longer with us, and all of the comrades we still have.”

11 clasped Sickle’s shoulder, “Together we thrive, together we rise.”

Notes:

Sorry for the delay. I've been traveling and didn't have my laptop with me.

Chapter 22: An Old Enemy

11 took in another long breath and held it. She focused on her body. The warmth of her spear, thrumming with her energy. The vague sense of her prosthetic she had from the energy flowing through it as well. She was calm, steady, soothing breaths. No Fear, Rage, Despair, or even Hunger. 

 

She looked around the room as everyone drew their weapons and prepared themselves. Sickle was very pleased as Bismuth 11 returned her scythe, now completely functional. 11 smiled, this certainly wasn't the way she imagined this moment, but that wasn't a problem at all. If anything, this was even better than she imagined. With the exception of Stevonnie being captured.

 

A banging at the door snapped 11 out of the moment.

“Sounds like we have company again. Jolt, ready your crossbow. Everyone else, behind me.”

 

The was the shuffle of movement as they all got into place. 11 charged her spear with Shadow energy.

“Ready?” 11 asked as the pounding at the door doubled in ferocity.

“Ready!” Everyone replied.

 

11 unleashed her strike as a slice of energy, which easily cut open the doors and the two gems closest to the door. Jolt fired several bolts from her crossbow and took out the other four Gems. Bismuth and Amethyst bubbled the gems and sent them to Earth.

 

The group met little resistance at first, since they had cleared out a good portion of the troops on this floor heading to the security room. Jolt led the way since she had downloaded the map while waiting for them to make it to the security room. As they moved up a floor, things became more intense.

 

At first, it was just more troops of quartzes with an agate in charge. They easily tore through them, falling into the groove of the pearls leading the charge so the others could bubble the poofed gems.

 

When they entered a large room though, they found a trio of garnets with a cymophane and two more quartz troops.

The cymophane spoke, “I will give you one chance and one chance only, surrender now or else.”

“We'll never surrender,” Garnet and 11 said in unison.

 

“Rascal,” Garnet said with a grin as she briefly touched her sunglasses, “11's going to need to borrow your hammer.”

Rascal excitedly handed it over. 11 hesitated as she took it, but still did, and handed her spear to Garnet when she asked for it.

“You know I can't completely fuse anymore right?” 11 questioned.

‘Don't worry,” Garnet replied and combined her gauntlets with 11's spear, because of course Bismuth had forged the ability to be combined with gem weapons into it, “we can fuse enough.”

 

“What are you fools doing?” Cymophane asked, “Surrender now.”

11 and Garnet synched quickly, doing a shortened version of their fusion dance without Garnet throwing 11.

 

11 felt herself starting to blend with Garnet and expected it to be similar to fusing with another mother where they would feel a little of the new personality, in this case Sardonyx, a little of Garnet, and a little of herself. To her surprise though, Sardonyx became stronger and stronger. From Garnet she felt Future Vision had seen this happening, that their bodies would remain separate, but Sardonyx could take over since Garnet was not also a mother of pearl. So 11 let go of herself, let herself become Sardonyx.

 

“Well, well, well, what a pleasant surprise!” Sardonyx spoke with two mouths, “And here I thought I'd never get to exist again. Oh my, two bodies, one mind is a new one. Good thing improv is one of my strongest performance skills.”

 

“Holy shit, your voices,” Bismuth said, “Sardonyx?!”

“Yes dear, in the flesh, well, two in the hardlight flesh, oh and plus a little extra,” she said as she flexed the prosthetic arm on one of her bodies, “I don't quite look myself yet though, not ready for the show, hmmmmm.”

 

Sardonyx evaluated her two bodies, the one with the pearl, 11, she found she couldn't do much to except change the color of the hair to her usual apricot and one of the eyes to her magenta. The body with two gems, Garnet, though, she could change much more. Sardonyx changed Garnet into her outfit, swapping out the pink diamonds on her shoes for a yellow star and the symbol of the new orders and making her tail coats a bit more like part dress part suit, taking inspiration from Garnet's wedding outfit, which amused 11 to learn of course even Garnet’s wedding outfit was a fusion and made Garnet very proud. Sardonyx changed Garnet’s coloration completely to her own, although kept Garnet's hair the same shape.

 

“Ah yes, much, much better,” Sardonyx spoke, and then a flash of Future Vision showed the likely need for Opal but Opal would struggle a bit more with the two bodies so she added “I usually don't get to see my components like this, that's a little fun. And disorienting, but thinking of myself as two halves, one 11's form and the other Garnet’s form seems to work.”

 

Cymophane laughed, “Is this supposed to intimidate us, traitors?”

“Oh no, no, no, darling,” Sardonyx replied, “this was simply the preparation, the warm-up. Don't worry, the show's about to begin.” 

 

Sardonyx wrapped an arm around each of her body's shoulders and then lifted her two hammers to rest on her other shoulders, allowing the heads of the hammers gently smack together.

 

“Enough!” Cymophane snarled and ordered the two quartz troops to move in.

Sardonyx did a quick bow, “And it looks like we have our first contestants. How about we start with a dance?”

“Yeah, fuck ‘em up Sards!” Amethyst yelled.

 

Sardonyx smirked and then hooked two of her arms together and shot forward, spinning with her hammers out. The quartzes continued to charge, assuming they could overpower the fused pair, but Sardonyx easily bowled them over, sending them flying across the room and landing hard enough against the wall to poof. The quartzes hit with the hammer made of Garnet's gauntlets also bubbled and sent those gems away, the others clattered to the floor.

 

Future Vision gave her an idea. Sardonyx maintained control as she separated her bodies, using Garnet's form to launch 11 in the air. She used a Shadow arm from 11's back to grab the ceiling and wait as she moved Garnet's form in place. Sardonyx slid to the side, bubbling the other poofed quartzes. 

 

Future Vision again showed the most likely path was the trio of garnets lining up perfectly in a few moments. Sardonyx smirked, “Well, well like fish in a barrel,” and she sent Garnet's form towards the spot the line up would happen, reaching perfectly in time to hit the front garnet with an electrified hammer, knocking her into the two garnets behind her and sending the three towards 11's form.

 

Sardonyx then moved 11's form, spinning off the ceiling for extra momentum to slam the borrowed hammer into the flying garnets and poofing all three with a single blow. Sardonyx brought her two bodies back together, bubbling the three fallen garnets and preparing for the remaining quartzes, agates, and the cymophane to rush her.

 

To her surprise, the cymophane held back. She wasn't entirely sure why, but also didn't have time to muse too much on this as the quartzes and agates bore down on her. Sardonyx batted some of them away towards the others so they could help without getting into friendly fire range, then began spinning and swinging, not erratically, but certainly without restraint. 

 

Sardonyx looked for Cymophane again, and frowned as she realized she had moved. Sardonyx's eyes darted around the room as she dodged an attack with Garnet and blocked another with 11. She saw a very familiar alexandrite had entered the room. That wasn't good. Not only was one chrysoberyl hard enough to contend with, but there was now two, and since this was the alexandrite Chrysoberyl used to report to, it was very likely she would recognize 11.

 

Sardonyx didn't see Cymophane again either. She hastily knocked the handful of quartzes away. Alexandrite ordered 11 to freeze. Sardonyx felt the pull of the order but was able to ignore it and continue to move 11's form. 

 

Sardonyx felt 11's consciousness become stronger, a little panic in her triggered by the sight of Alexandrite and the order, even though the order was unsuccessful. Sardonyx soothed 11, she was safe, she was protected, and Sardonyx vowed to ensure the only way Alexandrite left this room was in a bubble. 11 let go again and Sardonyx took complete control once more.

The second the last of the quartzes had been sent Sardonyx switched targets to Alexandrite, but it was too late. Cymophane came shooting out from behind a wall she just lowered and kicked Garnet and 11 away from each other, hard. 

 

The pain started splitting Sardonyx's control. Alexandrite kicked 11 this time, sending her flying towards Amethyst while Cymophane used her powers to make walls raise up from the ground to isolate them. Sardonyx knew she couldn't stay fused for much longer. With her last moments, she had Garnet separate 11's spear and threw it into the forming room 11 was kicked to.

 

11 slammed into the wall with a choking gasp as it winded her. She forced herself to look around, even though she was a little disoriented after the breaking of her fusion with Garnet. She saw her spear nearby and Amethyst running over her. Alexandrite was smiling as she looked down on her and the walls closed around them.

 

11 instantly had to battle Fear down.

“You okay?” Amethyst asked.

“Fuse, now, please,” 11 managed to gasp.

 

She wasn't sure if being able to resist Alexandrite’s order earlier had been because she was fused with Garnet and Sapphire outranked her, or just because she was fused with a non-mother of pearl, but she knew her resistance to orders alone wouldn't be enough. She had tested her resistance to orders as the New Order gained more members and learned that most Gems considered “elite” could still give her orders. Only gems like quartzes, rubies, fellow pearls, bismuths, and peridots could she completely resist. Mid level Gems like agates and onyxes were a bit trickier, but still manageable. Alexandrite was a type of chrysoberyl, an elite form of a chrysoberyl in Homeworld's eyes, there was no way she could resist her orders alone.

 

11 focused in on fusing. It was always so hard to form Opal, Amethyst and 11 were so opposite in so many ways, finding common ground was difficult. They were both terrified at the moment though so they started there. Thankfully Alexandrite was the type that liked to boast so that bought them more time.

 

“Well, well, well, 3-11, we meet again. I have to admit, I am surprised. I was quite convinced Chrysoberyl had quite thoroughly broken you. After all you seemed so earnest when you'd pleasure me with your mouth and you would orgasm so readily when I'd use your little cunt and bred you. Now look at you playing leader. Should I tie up your friend and make her watch while I remind you of your place?”

 

This made Rage flare up in 11, she was worried it would impede their fusion, but instead she felt more connected with Amethyst as she also became disgusted and infuriated by the comment. 11 was particularly amused by a strong thought from Amethyst of, “Talk shit, get hit, bitch.” 

Finally, they started to feel Opal between them and 11 surrendered herself.

 

Opal took in a deep breath with her two forms and let it out slowly. There was pain in one of her chests. She almost felt herself come undone immediately, thrown off by having two bodies instead of one. She remembered what Sardonyx had said, to think of her components as two halves of herself, as 11 and Amethyst, and remained in control. 

 

She had Amethyst perch on 11’s shoulder and 11 stand. From 11 she had knowledge that Alexandrite would be very strong and fast since she was a type of chrysoberyl. She quickly changed Amethyst so her outfit, coloration, eyes, and hairstyle reflected herself. For 11 she changed the color and pupil of her right eye and the color of her hair. As she looked at Alexandrite Opal felt her components wills become stronger and threatening the fusion again.

 

11 was struggling, looking at this Gem, unsure if she could give her orders, and being trapped in a room with her involuntarily brought of memories of abuse, of things she endured directly from the Gem, being raped, being used as some sort of proof to the higher ups she was less than other Gems, but also, what Alexandrite did to her friends, she pictured a fading pearl lying in a bed and then shattering in her hands, she couldn’t save her, she had wanted to save her, she had been innocent, Alexandrite knew she was innocent, and yet, yet she was gone now. Gone for existing, gone because Chrysoberyl thought she was useless to her and Homeworld because of The Fade and this fucking Alexandrite agreed.

 

11 started pulling away from Opal, she didn’t want to expose Amethyst to this, she felt bad about it. But Amethyst leaped, held them together tight, held them as 11, Opal, and Amethyst and screamed, “Fuck this dude. Fuck this cunt, you aren’t the problem, she is. Let me in, trust me, let me help you put this piece of shit into a bubble, because you aren’t forcing me to, I want to. I fucking miss you Pierogi, and I care about you, I always have, even when we were fighting all the time. The least I can do is lend what little power I have to stop fuckwads that have hurt you.”

 

And 11 cried, so they all cried, and she accepted it, said Amethyst had more power than she knew, and she was proud to have such an ally by her side in such a dire moment, and released her fear for the moment with the statement, “I trust you, completely and forever.” 

And then there was just Opal again, still with two bodies, but now of one mind.

 

Opal looked at the Alexandrite with a singular purpose: End the threat of her.

She ignored Alexandrite's taunt, something about them seeming unstable. It didn't matter.

 

Alexandrite tried to give 11 orders. Opal felt the tug, but she was also easily able to ignore it. She smirked, so it was just fusion itself that gave her the edge. Peace and calm relaxed Opals's shoulders and backs. She took in another breath, held it, and let it out slowly.

 

Time to get to work.

 

Opal pulled Jolt’s longbow from 11’s limited storage. Opal decided to humiliate Alexandrite by defeating her as quickly as possible. When Alexandrite charged, she brought out a smoke bomb kept for Rascal from 11’s pearl and used Amethyst to quickly create an energy arrow and shoot the smoke bomb, then used the cover to get around Alexandrite as she charged right into the smoke and began coughing as she breathed it in and closed her eyes. Alexandrite summoned a mace and haphazardly swung it around, trying to protect herself.

 

But Opal stood far away from Alexandrite now, using Amethyst to create another energy arrow, except she took her time, let it charge, waited for the Alexandrite to stumble towards her more, wiping tears from her eyes after the smoke and then look at Opal right as she drew her bow back all the way and fired. 

 

Alexandrite screamed no, screamed how they were beneath her. She swung her mace at the arrow and barely made contact in time, but the power of the arrow overwhelmed her, engulfing and piercing right through her. The arrow forced her into her Gem, bubbling her and sending her to Earth. The arrow continued, blasting open a massive gap into the wall before fizzling out.

 

As Opal emerged, Cymophane yelled at her, how dare she, she couldn’t have beaten Alexandrite that quickly. So Opal drew her bow back again, creating another strong energy arrow, then stated, “And yet, I did.”

The arrow wasn’t for Cymophane though, it was for the wall behind her, and to distract her. Garnet and Sickle descended upon Cymophane, Garnet hitting her squarely in the jaw to stun her and Sickle slicing her in half with a single swing of her scythe. 

 

Garnet bubbled and sent Cymophane away, then both her and Sickle jumped away. Opal released her arrow, shooting a clear path through multiple floors and all the way outside. Then Opal kneeled, bringing Amethyst down to the floor and letting Amethyst and 11 embrace each other as she unfused.

 

11 cried into Amethyst’s shoulder, “I’m so sorry, I was trying to stop those memories, but-”

“Dude,” Amethyst cut her off, “I meant it when I said I was happy I could help you beat that cunt. Don’t make it weird, Pierogi. Besides, I’m fucking tired of these enemies threatening to rape you in front of me, got it? That’s fucked up, and I’m not about it.”

11 wiped away her tears, “Right, right, thank you.”

Amethyst blushed and thumbed her nose, “I’m just doing the bare minimum dude, you don’t have to thank me for it,” and then walked away. 

11 smiled, knowing that was Amethyst’s way of showing she cared in her guarded way.

 

11 stood and grabbed her spear, staring ahead towards the way out Opal had punched through the building. Sickle came over and checked in on her, a little uncertain when 11 assured her she was fine now, but satisfied.

 

Jolt called out, “Boss, check communications! Also can I have my longbow since we’re moving more into the open?”

11 gave Jolt her bow and put her finger to the communicator still in her ear to activate it, “This is 11, go for message.”

 

Ghostwriter jumped on, quickly speaking in Nacreous, “11! Good, glad you’re safe. It’s getting weird out here. Blue Diamond and Yellow Diamond were seen fighting in Yellow’s sector with the ones you called Steven and Connie nearby. Eventually Yellow and Blue stopped fighting, and they took Steven and Connie towards Pink Diamond’s ship. White Diamond intercepted them, though. She’s taken control of Yellow and Blue Diamond and then absorbed them into her ship and took control of Pink Diamond’s as well! She’s back at her throne room in the White section, and Yellow and Blues’ back up ships have joined as well. They’re just waiting there, and Steven and Connie are heading towards them.”

 

11 frowned and replied in Nacreous, “Thank you for the update, we’re escaping the prison now and will intercept and help Steven and Connie get to White Diamond. Focus on executing Cloudfall.”

“Affirmative, Ghost out.”

11 turned to the group, “Steven needs us, let’s go.”

Chapter 23: The Wall

11 perched at the opening, everyone else nearby and Garnet looking out with her. Despite being in White’s sector, they were still far away from White’s throne, where the combined ship of all four Diamond’s ships ominously stood, waiting, ready.  There was a shield around the combined ship and White’s entire sector that prevented the New Order from attacking it. They were within the shield though since they had been in White’s prison. Connie and Steven had made it into White’s sector before the shield went up as well, although the group had lost sight of them. 

“That shield needs to come down so we can get back up. Jolt, can you find the power source?”

Jolt partially unwrapped her chest and her eyes turned royal blue with dark grey scleras, “It's in the wall halfway between here and the megaship.”

 

Garnet pointed to the distance, Steven and Connie were visible again, although way too far to talk or even get their attention. They were heading directly towards the megaship.

“Alright, Garnet, Amethyst, do you mind sticking with us a little longer so we can knock this shield out faster? If there isn't anything major we should make it to the ship at about the same time as Connie and Steven.”

 

Garnet touched her glasses, “We'll help with the shield. It's needed.”

11 nodded and they all headed out. 

 

Immediately, 11 felt something was off. It was too quiet. She rationalized maybe White had mobilized a lot of the troops in her sector to attack The New Order in the other sectors before she raised the shield. As they made it towards the wall and 11 saw absolutely no guards whatsoever, she halted the team and had them duck into a building.

 

“Something isn't right,” 11 whispered, “why is there absolutely no one guarding this wall? Even though the shield is activated, this wall is typically the most guarded since it separates the outer and inner ring of her sector. White Diamond likes some redundancy, she would still have something else here even with the shield.”

Garnet touched her glasses again, “Agreed, but I can't…I don't have enough information to predict the possible paths. Any ideas?”

 

11 couldn't help but look a little surprised at Garnet. It was unlike her to so openly admit she didn't know what to do, and the last time she heard a question from Garnet was way back when they first met.

“You alright there?” Amethyst asked.

11 shook her head, “Sorry, just changes and all. Anyway,” 11 closed her right eye so she could see lifeforce energy more easily, “I'm really not seeing any Gems, even with my Shadow vision. Is there extra tech Jolt?”

Jolt used her vision and shook her head,“I don't see anything, just the shield power source. Feels like a trap.”

 

“Maybe they just expect us to be in prison still?” Rascal offered.

“Or they're lulling us into a false sense of security.” Sickle added.

“11,” Bismuth spoke up, “let me try. You know despite my size I can be stealthy enough when needed,1 and I can easily demolish that wall and the power source by myself. Especially with all of you watching my back.”

11 debated, “You have done it before.”

“Multiple times,” Garnet added.

11 agreed, “Alright. Bring it down Biz, be careful, the walls here are sturdier than the ones you took out on Earth, but we've got you covered.”

Bismuth grinned and headed out.

It was tense as they watched her. She was doing a good job of staying out of sight and quiet. Everything else remained still, too still.

 

And then 11 saw it, or something, she actually wasn't sure what it was at first. A small distortion that got bigger and bigger the more she looked at it. Then she realized it was moving. What was it though? She saw lifeforce suddenly, both light, and shadow.

“Bismuth watch out!!” 11 yelled right as a giant creature revealed itself and went to slam down on Bismuth with both light and shadow energy.

 

It took 11 a moment to piece together, but the look of the energy helped her realize this was a corrupted Gem that had been touched by Shadow or some other similar Crystal the way Jolt and Justice were. It also had some sort of camouflage ability, and she realized it hadn't actually fully revealed itself yet, just what was needed to attack Bismuth. 11 started teleporting to intercept the attack.

 

It was too late. The creature came crushing down on Bismuth before 11 could make it. Shadow energy rained down with the blow, completely distorting Bismuth’s energy, and then as its leg started to lift, Bismuth's energy had completely disappeared from the spot. Not just weakened or concentrated into her gem. Gone.

 

Rage and Despair instantly flared up, partially transforming 11 and clouding her thoughts. She screeched and with her Shadow claws severed the giant leg of the creature that had crushed Bismuth. Hunger panged her, but when she tried to eat she couldn't focus herself. She was warring within now to remain in control as Despair made her ooze and wanted to take over, and Rage made her teeth jagged and also wanted to take over.

 

She hadn't been able to save Bismuth. She was so done losing Gems she cared about and now, Bismuth was gone too. 11 was starting to lose herself without a tether. She realized since she had teleported Sickle and Rascal wouldn't be able to get to her in time to anchor for her either.

 

She glanced up and saw another leg coming towards her to crush her. Sugalite intercepted the attack and started wrestling with the corruption. An expertly placed arrow from Jolt's longbow pierced the Shadow Corruption with a special energy that sent electricity laced with shadow power through it. Finally its entire body was revealed; it looked like a cross between a centipede and iguana. It was three times as big as Sugilite with twenty legs, at the mouth was a powerful set of pincers and a fanged jaw, as well as a long tail, and spikes that ran down its back. There were two gems at its throat, a corrupted fusion then.

 

11 had to look away as Rage and Despair threatened to overwhelm her again. 

Then 11 heard Bismuth behind her. 

“That was a close one.”

Rage and Despair instantly went back down as 11 looked and saw Biz had turned her hands into shovels and tunneled away from the attack. 11 glanced back at the spot Bismuth had been attacked and saw a hole. That's why it had looked like her energy was gone, 11 had focused so hard on the exact spot she missed Bismuth’s energy moving away underground.

 

Purely on instinct, 11 ran and tackled Bismuth. She struggled to speak about how she thought Bismuth had been shattered through her sobbing. She squeezed Bismuth tight before kissing her. 11 heard Bismuth shift her hands back into hands and felt them on her back, reassuring and warm.

 

When 11 pulled away a little Bismuth said, “Hey, I'm alright, I'm alright, that was a close call, but I'm good.”

11 still trembled but nodded and then chuckled, “I guess uh, I guess I'm not any good at taking things slow with you, sorry.”

 

Bismuth blushed and kissed 11 briefly, “I haven't exactly been any good at it myself. I mean, I was even the one who, uh, initiated after that one mission.”

11 smiled, “True, although I had a pretty good idea of what would happen after you invited me to your room.”

 

11 felt them start to fuse without really meaning too. Bismuth was hesitant, waiting to see what 11 wanted. 11 mused it had certainly been a busy day with fusing and then let herself go.

Labradorite instantly laughed and stretched with all of her arms.

 

“Woooo! Good to be back in action. And hey, twice the fun with twice the bodies,” she joked as she looked at herself.

Labradorite quickly updated her look, changing Bismuth’s skin tone to her iridescent teal and both of her forms’ hair to golds and metallic greens. She ended up keeping the style of Bismuth’s clothes, but changed the colors to a vibrant royal blue and accents of gold and metallic green.

 

“Hey lovebirds,” Sugilite, panting as she tossed the corrupt, shadow fusion towards the wall, “If you're done being sappy, come pull your weight.” 

Sugilite inhaled deeply and then spit purple flames at the ground, making a trail of molten rock from the wall to near Labradorite.

 

“Fuck!” Sugilite cursed as the shadow corruption wrapped its tail around her and yanked her backwards and towards the mouth. Sugilite grabbed its pincers to hold herself away from the gnashing teeth.

 

Labradorite grinned, moving her Bismuth half to molten ground, placing one foot into it, and activating her powers. She was happy she still had them despite the unusual fusion. The molten rocks intensified and spread until there was a river of bubbling lava heading towards the wall. 

Labradorite moved her 11 half close and confirmed she did not have lava-proofing. Bismuth and Labradorite were usually lava-proof but 11 wasn't, and unfortunately the immunity hadn't passed through this level of fusion. She pulled a lava-proof face helmet and pair of gloves from her bismuth gem, stored there long ago when Pearl would help Bismuth in the Forge. She tossed the gear to her 11 half, and Labradorite put on the helmet and one glove. The left glove didn't fit over 11's prosthetic, so Labradorite stored the glove back into her bismuth.

 

Labradorite had 11 hop onto Bismuth’s form, using the prosthetic to hold one of her Bismuth shoulders, and placing 11's feet on Bismuth's back, crouched and ready. She was pleased to find that 11's form may not have gotten the lava proofing, but it did get the ability to manipulate lava and magma.

 

The river of lava reached the wall, making it groan and creak from the strain. Labradorite used her lava manipulation to ride the lava towards the wall, pulling up fistfuls of lava with her Bismuth hands and gloved 11 hand and throwing them strategically at the wall. By the time she reached the wall it had started to buckle, and as she jumped up, bringing the river of lava with her, it finally collapsed in the middle. 

 

The shield around them flickered as the main power source was exposed and melted by the lava. A back-up turned on and the shield became solid again. Labradorite planted her feet on the wall near where she had made it collapse and started running across it, taking the lava with her and hoping the backup would be in the wall as well so if she destroyed enough of it, she'd knock the shield out.

 

“I see the back-up,” Jolt said through the ear piece in one of Labradorite’s 11's ears, “I'll mark its location with an arrow.”

Labradorite paused, keeping a watch out for the arrow and glancing at Sugilite as she continued to fight the Corrupted and shadow-touched gem. Both giants’ forms were battered, but Sugilite’s fusion hadn't come undone, and the corruption had not lost form.

 

An arrow with a flattened, sticky head thumped onto the wall several meters away.

“Target successfully marked.” Jolt said through the ear piece.

 

Labradorite grinned, she grabbed a huge ball of lava with her gloved 11 hand and then used her bismuth half to launch her 11 half at the arrow. Labradorite didn’t quite make it to the arrow so she ran with her 11 half along the side of the wall, using the ball of lava as an opposing force to keep her upright against gravity. Once she got close enough, Labradorite leaped up and chucked the ball of lava right at the arrow, making a hole straight into the wall and destroying all the tech at that spot. The shield fell and didn’t turn back on.

 

Labradorite had her bismuth half jump at the shadow-touched corruption bringing what was left of the river of lava with her, and holding a ball of lava in her hand. Labradorite brought her 11 half back to her bismuth half by using the ball of lava in one of her bismuth hands like a magnet, instead of using her power to bring the lava to her 11 half, she used it to bring her 11 half to the lava. Labradorite perched her 11 half on her bismuth’s half shoulders and back again and rained lava down on the corruption right as it landed a blow that separated Sugilite back into Garnet and Amethyst.

 

The corruption screeched and thrashed as the lava overtook it. Labradorite was careful, keeping lava under her feet and weaving through the thrashing limbs while channeling the lava to also damage the corruptions form but not her gems. Now that Labradorite was closer, she recognized the gems, a tourmaline and a quartz, they were a Crystal Gem permafusion, Tanzanite, obviously corrupted on Earth and at some point after the end of the war had been captured by Homeworld and brought here for experiments.

 

“Sorry old comrade,” Labradorite said, “we can’t heal you yet, but until we can Tanzanite, we won’t let them hurt you anymore.”

Then she squeezed corrupted and shadow-touched Tanzanite with the lava and she didn’t just fall out of her fusion, but poofed too. Labradorite caught the two gems and put them in the same bubble and sent the pair to Earth.  

 

Amethyst flopped to the ground and Garnet kneeled so they could take a quick rest and ready themselves for more fighting. Labradorite felt 11 and Bismuth’s wills more, 11 was worried about maintaining her energy levels after all of the fusing, so Labradorite stored the lava proof helmet and glove back in her bismuth gem and let go.

 

11 was a little shaky on her feet for a moment. She had eaten a lot of energy on the way out of the prison, but between using her powers and fusing, she had gone through it all. Before 11 could think too much about it, Bismuth scooped her into her arms and held her close as she spun and laughed, giddy from the fusion and the success. 11 laughed and nuzzled into Bismuth’s face.

“I forgot how fun it is to be Labradorite,” 11 whispered.

 

A loud, low siren shook White Diamond’s entire sector and shook 11 back into the battle. Homeworld ships scattered, haphazardly fleeing to the next closest Diamond sector.

11 jumped to the ground and called Ghost, “Ghost tell everyone heading into White Diamond’s sector to reverse and be ready to evade, something is about to happen. I’m not sure what, but all Homeworld ships are fleeing White Diamond’s sector so-”

 

She was cut off as a massive beam shot from White Diamond’s ship, taking out the tops of a few buildings and large swathes of ships. The vast majority of the destroyed ships were Homeworld ships. The New Order’s forces were barely breaching the shield perimeter, and had started reversing per commands, so most were still in Blue or Yellow’s sector. White had taken out a huge portion of her own, personal soldiers, particularly closest to her throne, because they weren’t given enough time. All to hit only a handful of New Order ships, and some of them had managed to keep flying after and were now out of White’s sector.  

 

Was that truly the maximum range? Or was that just the standard range? Maybe she hadn’t let it fully charged and fired just to slow the advance once the shield was down to buy her more time. Way too many possibilities. Way too many ways for the fighters trusting her with their lives to die. And what about Steven and Connie? They were closing in on White’s ship, near where the buildings were hit. Were they far enough from the rubble raining down? What if they got to White’s ship without backup.

 

“Shit,” 11 tossed the ear piece to Sickle, “Sickle, take- oof.”

 

11’s ears rung for a moment. She was disoriented, and then she realized she was on the ground, how did she get on the ground? Dust billowed around her going in odd directions before starting to settle. Right, shockwave, the light of the attack traveled faster than the shockwave from firing. 11 forced herself to her feet, “Sickle, report.”

“Here” Sickle responded in Nacreous and then switched to Common, “I’m here. No injuries.”

 

11 nodded, her disorientation alleviated a good amount. Everyone else was uninjured and returning to their feet as well.

 

Movement behind them caught 11’s attention.  She turned and saw several large light cannons appearing along the undamaged parts of the wall.

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” 11 cursed as she pulled Rascal’s bomb bag and Rascal’s roller skates out of her gem, “Rascal, go all out, knock out as many cannons as you can.”

 

Rascal squealed with glee as she took the items from 11. She hummed to herself as she quickly changed out her shoes and transformed her hammer into a giant bat. Rascal secured the bag with all her bombs across her torso and then locked in place by a custom-made buckle around her thigh. She went silent and looked back at 11 for the cue to start.

 

11 looked back at Sickle, “Sickle, take command of The New Order and back-up Rascal. Jolt, Justice, Crystal Gems, with me,” 11 turned to White Diamond’s ship and glared, “we’re not letting White Diamond take a second shot.”

Chapter 24: Operation Cloudfall

“Stop White Diamond before she fires again?!” Jolt exclaimed, “How?”

11 continued giving orders, “Rascal, go have fun.” 

Rascal squealed with glee again and raced off, taking out three canons in quick succession by throwing the bombs up for herself to hit with her bat. She was cheering and laughing as she skated to the next section of canons.

 

“Jolt, Justice, you are both going to transform. Jolt, you’ll shield the Crystal Gems from shadow power. Justice, you stay close by me in case you need to cut some sense into me.”

Justice smiled and signed, “Whatever crazy fucking plan you’re about to tell us, I’m in.”

 

11 pointed at the gap in the wall, “Nearby the other side of that hole we just made are roughly 550 Homeworld foot soldiers, including several high ranking commanders and a general. It will take too long to fight them, plus we still have a large distance to cover in a short time before the second shot. So I’m going to eat their energy and use my Dragon Form. Jolt, you are going to bring the Crystal Gems onto my back once I’m transformed and stable, and prepare to help me stay stable if needed.”

“Wait,” Amethyst barked, “what does that all mean?”

“No time,” 11 held her hand out and aimed for the middle of the clearing after the wall, “we’re going now.”

 

11 felt that odd rush as she teleported, like sound, light, and space were all contorting and screeching by her at superspeed, and then it was quiet. She struggled to stay upright for a moment, tripping but not falling. She was still a little shaky from low energy. She was about to fix that though. And then immediately use up the energy and be right back at low energy.

 

11 stilled her thoughts, “Focus, don’t jump ahead, the most important step is the one I’m currently on.” 

The energy of all the Homeworld Gems around her lit up like beacons. Hunger stirred. She soothed it, reassuring it that although she would not feed on souls, she was about to feed.

 

11 let off her cape, undid the clasps of her shirt, and then shrugged the shirt off her shoulders to hang from her waist where it attached. She had gotten pretty good about keeping her clothes intact through a transformation, but her torso was still tricky, and she had never done this transformation with her prosthetic on so she wanted to focus on protecting it while it was surrounded by Shadow energy. 11 pushed that worry out of her thoughts and began to float as she inhaled deeply. She paused and let things be completely still, and then gasped for a deeper breath. 

 

All of the energy started coming to her, and she continued to inhale. Then 11 felt it, a massive rush. She’d never fed on energy off this many living things at once. It was overwhelming for a moment, but she managed to stay in control. 

 

She focused again on all the beacons of energy around her. They were dwindling, disappearing into her. 11 was looking for this perfect moment, the one where the light was just a careless breath away from going out, the moment she had to disengage. This would force all she was feeding on into their gems. If she left too much, they wouldn’t poof, and could attack her; if she left too little, she would devour their souls.

 

She saw it, the perfect moment, and disengaged. She hit the ground a little hard, stumbling forward onto her hands and knees. She had done it though, all the Homeworld gems around her were in their gems and she was overflowing with energy. It was unbearable, making her entire form feel like it was about to split open and burst. That was fine, though. This would last no more than another moment as she shifted to her next task: transformation.

 

11 had still only completed this transformation a handful of times. All were when she was safe around Haven and training. All had been extremely draining. A very different circumstance than this moment of chaos and a race against death. It was okay, she confirmed to herself, she knew how to do it, she could trust herself, this was a part of her, her transformation, her power, and trust that Jolt and Justice would complete their tasks flawlessly, and that Sickle would handle the rest of The New Order, and that The Crystal Gems would be there to back up Steven and Connie. 

 

Everything went stark white, and it felt like all the energy had actually exploded out of her for a second until 11 could feel a rhythm to the chaos, a pattern just barely there, struggling to connect itself amongst the screeching static, but there. She focused on that feeling, the pattern, followed the pattern, and as she did, she felt her form solidify. 

 

11 inhaled and as she did it sounded like a great gust of wind. The air assaulted her nose and mouth with tastes of melted electronics, still cooling rock, and fear. She looked around, it was both amazing, and limiting. She could see over so many rooftops now, and White Diamond’s ship suddenly seemed much more average in size, but she was struggling to spot Steven and Connie, she was simply a different scale. There were giant projections dotted here and there as far as she could see playing The New Order’s message, the call to action, to join, to fight.

 

All of the fear around her tugged at her again. She could see thousands and thousands of lights, all the Gems in White’s sector and even a little into Blue’s and Yellow’s. And they were all looking at her. And they were afraid. So much energy for her to feed, so much fear, so many souls. So much food life.

 

“Focus.” 11 said, although all that came out was a raspy hiss and a brief grunt.

11 found Steven and Connie just as Justice landed on her back. Not long after, Jolt landed on her back with the Crystal Gems protected in her distortion shield. 11 could not see them, but she felt them, and the familiarity of the active Shadow power released from Jolt and Justice calmed 11.

 

11 spread out her wings and charged. Of the other times she had transformed into the Dragon, she had only flown once. She was flying a second time now. 11 was a little too low at first, pushing off buildings with her legs to give her a little boost before they crumbled in her grasp. Finally, she was high enough she wasn’t hitting any buildings, but low enough she could keep her eye on Steven and Connie, who were thankfully jumping across rooftops towards White’s Ship and hadn't spotted her yet. 

 

11 felt Jolt and her distortion shield shift to 11's other side so they would be closer to Steven and Connie as 11 passed. 11 was pleased, they hadn’t discussed this in the plan, it was a last minute impulse as she was transforming, but Jolt knew to adjust accordingly without further communication. 11 tilted and swooped low over the roof Steven and Connie were frozen and staring at her from now that they noticed her. Jolt scooped the two up and into the shield.

 

11 used the buildings to throw herself even higher than before and change direction sharply. She gained a little more height and then dove, bringing her wings and legs in close so she was more streamline.  11 closed her eyes briefly as she passed through one of the projections, the voice echoing around her, it was Ghost, reading the last words 4-3 wrote so long ago before she shattered in The Jackknife, “Even when I’m shards, know I am always there, telling you to never give up.”

 

11 roared to channel a boost from Rage and Despair as she thought about 4-3, 3-3, 3-2, 5-8, and every single mother of pearl that didn’t make it out of The Jackknife. Something happened, something new. She didn’t have time to ponder it or explore it, but it was like all of the mothers she was thinking of was with her, standing on her back, surrounding Jolt, Justice, and the Crystal Gems, supporting her. Now she was barreling straight for White Diamond’s ship, filled with fury and determination. Her roar tapered off into something more like a screech and then she snapped her mouth shut with an audible clack of her teeth.

 

White turned to her and fired the big weapon again, even though all Homeworld ships were still not out of the sector. It was fine though, because the weapon was pointed right at 11. 11 opened her mouth and inhaled deeply as the blast came towards her. It was a lot of energy to eat, she would have never been able to do it if she wasn’t already transformed. She struggled. She felt that vague presence, that memory of mothers lost on her back strongly again, she heard a few of their voices.

3-3 saying, “C’mon Cold Bud, where’s your warrior’s pride.”

3-2 encouraging, “Like you’re always telling me, it takes all types in a rebellion, and that includes you.”
5-8 laughing, “Hey, diplomacy has gotten us this far,” then her tone going serious, “now our blades must handle the rest.”

 

11 felt like everything was on fire, and the crystals around her body glowed white-hot, she oozed from her eyes, and a deep guttural, screeching cry rattled in her throat, tenuously held back by gnashing fangs and bone-armored lips. Not only did she manage to eat all the energy of the blast, she had managed to siphon off some of it and circulate it around her body harmlessly. She fired that energy back from her mouth directly at White Diamond, destroying the weapon and taking out one of the legs of Pink’s ship, forcing the megaship to a knee. 

 

11 sank the rest of the surplus energy into something she usually would never even think of, she transported herself and everyone touching her right to White Diamond’s ship. 11 had to let go of the transformation before she lost control. Her last movement was to fling the Crystal Gems and Jolt into a maintenance entrance she knew of on White’s ship: the eyeball. She hoped it was still always open, since usually no one would dream of sabotaging a Diamond, but the war had changed things. Jolt could handle any automated security though.

 

11 felt her body go completely weightless as it returned to her base form and she plummeted towards the ground far below. She didn’t have any energy to move, certainly not to transport again. She had used all that energy up already, firing back, transporting while she was so large, and breaking the transformation had burned through it all like nothing. A part of her whispered if she had taken even a handful of souls she would still have energy. Souls gave so much more than just life energy. 11 fought this thought down, Hunger would be connected to it, and that could be dangerous.

 

11 tried to look around but could barely get her head to move. She was hoping to see Justice nearby, although she was probably making her own safe landing. Since she was on the opposite side of 11's back when the others were tossed, she would have been flung the other way. Which meant she wouldn't have time to catch 11.

 

Hunger suddenly seemed less dangerous than free-falling straight into sheets of metal on the ground around the megaship. 11 started to panic, Fear bubbled up, but without energy slinked quickly away.

“Focus,” 11 closed her eyes and held out her hand, “focus.”

 

She managed to teleport just briefly, but didn’t make it to a building, and now she was higher again as she started falling once more.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, no, no focus, focus.” 11 grunted and closed her eyes tight.

 

And then suddenly she was decelerating and something tugged at her waist. She heard the flaps of wings and a voice asking if she was okay and she opened her eyes.

“Lapis?!” 11 exclaimed. 

“Oh good, you can still identify gem types. You’re a pearl. Of sorts, never seen one quite like you, and I have known a very odd pearl.”

“You’ll be pleased to know I’m the same odd renegade pearl. Although I go by 11 now.”

 

“What?” Lapis growled. Her brows went from furrowed to panicked, to furrowed again as she accidentally let go and then grabbed 11 by the shirt still attached to 11's waist to stop her falling again.

“That’s not something to joke about with me. How do you even know that.” Lapis spat.

“I’m not joking, I’m not joking,” 11 pleaded, glancing nervously at the ground and confirming she still had much too far off a drop and then back to Lapis, “it’s me, Homeworld faked my shattering, dug out a chunk of my gem to bait you all with, and then ran experiments on me that turned me into a hybrid.”

 

Lapis’s eyes went over 11’s face over and over, “You do look…similar. Say something only Crystal Gem Pearl would know.”

11 blushed, “Well, hm, when you were in the mirror,” 11 talked faster as she saw Lapis's face sour again, “which was fucked up of me, I was definitely in the wrong there. But well, we’re the only ones who know about the whole trying to recreate a date with Rose combining my projection powers and the mirror’s database and projection powers in a grief-fueled and desperate plan that did not work at all.”

Lapis snorted, “Yeah that was pretty pathetic. I laughed about it for a decade. Still laugh about it here and there when it crosses my mind. Guess you're like a cockroach then, just no getting rid of you.”  

 

11 rolled her eyes and bit back a retort, deciding it was best not to tease the Gem flying her to safety. She was about to ask how Lapis got there, but she saw a smaller attack from the megaship forming in the palm of Blue’s hand. Right as 11 alerted Lapis, a cobbled together arm ship made from the crashed Yellow and Blue ships the Crystal Gems had told her about, zipped out of the sky and grabbed the charging hand, forcing the attack to shoot harmlessly up.

 

 The Yellow arm of the megaship went to punch the patchwork ship. The patchwork ship yanked the Blue megaship arm into the oncoming attack, sending the megaship backwards onto its butt. The Homeworld ships left in White Diamond's sector came screaming back towards the megaship to defend the Diamonds, but The New Order ships were hot on their trails, charging now that 11 had taken out the weapon.

 

Lapis dropped 11 onto the second highest floor of a nearby building and landed herself.

“Are you going to be okay here?” 

“Give me a minute,” 11 flopped onto a nearby wall to support herself as she sat up, “hopefully I can recover enough so we can help Steven and the others.”

“Where are they?” Lapis asked.

“I tossed them into the left eye of White’s ship, they should be able to easily get to her throne room from there. I sent Jolt, one of my tech experts, with them to disengage any security measures they run into.”

“Oh that’s what you were doing when you got close to the ship. Couldn’t really see from my angle. How much time do you need?”

 

Lapis summoned her wings and protected them both as debris came flying from the fight between the patchwork ship and the megaship. White had punched the patchwork ship as it managed to rip Blue’s arm ship away, which had sent both arm ships into nearby buildings and sent the megaship to its back. Then the patchwork ship and Blue’s arm caught on fire.

“Peridot!” Lapis yelled and was about to take flight until Peridot appeared from the destroyed ships, surfing through the air on a trash can lid.

“Lapis! Lapis! Did you see! I ripped that arm right off!”

 

Peridot joined them and was excitedly recounting her feats. 11 managed to sit up some more and pulled up her shirt and fastened it. She was glad she used magnets for the clasps since her prosthetic was very stiff and sluggish because of how low her energy was.

“Oh, you’re a pearl, that’s a surprise,” Peridot said, “I’ve never seen a pearl that can transform into a dragon thing.”

Lapis explained who 11 was and 11 confirmed it.

 

Peridot started excitedly looking at 11’s prosthetic and how amazing the tech was and asking questions. Then Justice came leaping from the floor below and threw Peridot away from 11 and into Lapis.

“Whoa, whoa, stand down, stand down,” 11 said in Nacreous and then switched to Common, “Stand down Justice, they’re friends, Crystal Gems from Earth, they just got here.”

Lapis changed her wings to fists and stood at the ready; Peridot scrambled to her feet.

Justice changed her weapons from claws back to brass knuckles, relaxed her stance, and signed, “Oh, my bad, tell them I apologize.”

 

11 conveyed the message and introduced everyone to each other. Lapis crossed her arms but changed the water fists back to water wings and grunted an it’s fine. Peridot immediately started asking about Justice’s weapon.They were interrupted as ships made it to their location and dog fights broke out between Homeworld and the New Order.

 

“We’ll talk later,” 11 forced herself to stand, “we need to get into White’s ship and join the others. Peridot, do you think you could carry one of us with your powers and the trash can lid?”

Justice gently pushed 11 back to the ground and signed, “what do you think you’re doing? You are in no shape to go straight into an enemy stronghold.”

“I have to Justice, I can’t just get this close and do nothing.” 11 replied verbally and with sign.

 

Justice huffed and her hands slapped loudly together as she angrily signed, “You’ve done enough! You got us here, took out the shield, took out the big weapon, got the Crystal Gems into White’s ship, and did critical damage to her ship. And now you’re out of energy. Are you trying to die! Cuz I will NOT just stand by and let that happen.”

 

11 tried to stand again but couldn’t. Tears stung her eyes. Justice was right. She was tapped out. She had to rest. As she accepted this, 11 realized she was fighting to stay conscious as well. She still didn’t want to admit it though.

 

“Hey,” Lapis called, “we’ve got this,” she looked away, “you fought Homeworld for 1,000 years, had to watch and defend the Earth from your friends who were Corrupted by Homeworld for several thousands more, went through whatever they did that took your arm, gave you all those scars and made you a hybrid, and now you’re fighting the Diamonds directly. Save some glory for us new rebels and let us handle this.”

 

“Yeah! Like Biz always says, when it comes to rebelling against Homeworld there's plenty to go around!” Peridot flexed.

11 was surprised but chuckled, “Alright, alright, I suppose I'm in no position to argue,” she looked back at the ship, “Good luck you two.”

 

“Oh, we don't need luck.” Lapis boasted.

“Yeah,” Peridot put her hands to her hips, “we've been training with Bismuth. Plus we have our powers.”

Both of them took to the air, Lapis with her wings and Peridot with her trash can lid. They zipped straight for White Diamond’s eye, dodging the fights expertly and easily.

 

Justice helped 11 to her feet again and walked her a little more into the building so they would be more sheltered but could also keep an eye on the fights in case they needed to dodge. 11 couldn't help but cry in frustration again that she had been knocked out of the fight.

“You've done enough,” Justice forced herself to whisper, “any more you die or lose control.”

11 sniffled, “I know, I know.”

 

Justice and 11 settled and watched the fights. Justice began to cry.

“You really don’t have to stay here with me,” 11 encouraged, “go, join the fight.”

Justice chuckled soundlessly, her voice to warn out from the adventures of the day and the screeching she couldn’t contain while she was in her own Shadow mode. 

“It’s not that.” Justice signed.

“What is it?” 11 asked out loud and with sign.

 

“Your new power,” Justice started, “it was cool, I am so happy about it too, but, it was sad as well.”

“Oh,” 11 blinked a few times, “you felt and heard that too? Like the mother’s we lost were with us when I was the Dragon?”

Justice cocked her head, “Not just that, and not just us. These, odd shadowy versions of themselves, like they were made of nothing but jet black gauze wrapped around their forms, came up from your back. They were all around us, and we could all hear and see them.”

 

11 began to apologize and explain but Justice snapped her fingers and pursed her lips. 

“No sorries, I am glad they got to join the glory of the downfall of The Diamond Authority.”

11 chuckled and nodded. She supposed that was true. She hadn’t thought about it like that, but in many ways, they had joined her. She mentally noted to make sure she told Ghostwriter about this, how proud it would make her to know hearing her words unlocked this ability and allowed the dead to speak in this final hour.

 

The New Order was swiftly taking control of the skies. Many of White Diamond's ships disengaged and surrendered. 11 forced herself to stay awake by wondering how much White Diamond firing at her own ships impacted things. Then suddenly all of Homeworld's ships stopped. They didn't fight, they didn't run, they didn't dodge.

 

After a few shots, The New Order ships ceased firing and held their positions, hopeful but cautious. Then something 11 would never have believed if she hadn't seen it herself and made her mouth fall open happened: White Diamond's ship's face blushed pink, and a pink aura surrounded the megaship. It wasn’t Steven though, with her ability to see energy, 11 could see it was from White Diamond herself.

 

Then the official surrender message displayed in the sky by the megaship. Homeworld's ships actually surrendered, all of them landing and deboarding as New Order ships surrounded the megaship. 

 

After a tense handful of minutes Sickle's face appeared in the sky; she was using the planetary communication device they had stolen, probably patched into their intergalactic system as well. She announced the Diamonds had surrendered and a ceasefire had been agreed upon. They would officially open negotiations in five days. For now, The New Order would hold a position within White Diamond's sector and both sides would ready their arguments and demands, and arbiters would be decided.

 

11 couldn't help but laugh and squeeze Justice tight, mumbling about how they had done it before her words slurred and relief finally allowed exhaustion to win. 11 leaned back and did her best to warn Justice she was about to pass out. She wasn't sure how successful she was, but she felt Justice support her and gently placed their pearls together, a promise to watch over 11. So 11 stopped fighting and allowed herself to drift off.

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 2 of A Pearl Among Many