Work Text:
At this point, there was no other explanation besides the obvious: Captain Kelly was a racist pig and didn't even bother to hide it.
Yeonjun was thrilled to know that he was having his own desk and would be assigned his first few cases after finally leaving his days of being a beat cop behind, even after having to swallow loads and loads of really unfunny jokes about his race. Being a police officer was already difficult in New York by itself, but it was even worse for the son of a Korean immigrant couple. When the name Steve Choi was on the top of Yeonjun's file for his newest case, he immediately knew he was not going to have fun and do any real detective work any time soon. He was just the asian guy and of course his first assigned partner would be asian as well.
"C'mon Dan, lighten up. Captain is looking out for you, if you think about it," exclaimed Yeonjun's deskmate as he saw Yeonjun grimace. The man wasn't his friend and barely an acquaintance, since he decided from day one that Yeonjun's name was 'Way too difficult' and therefore he should keep his american name. No one in the office called him anything but Daniel. "Y'all share a last name and everything, you're probably long lost cousins or something."
Yeonjun didn't bother to correct Detective Johnson, just giving him the fakest smile possible and a shrug. He spent the next twenty minutes studying his third case, a stake out to observe the daughter of some cartel low ranking dealer. Great.
His first two cases weren't exciting, just a robbery and a home invasion. He solved those without having to leave his desk, just by skimming through the case files for longer than five seconds. Captain Kelly probably hated getting those faxes in under a day for each case, so now he was punishing Yeonjun with having to watch a nineteen year old girl from a nearby window. It was going to
be exciting to spend at least ten days in a rented room on the other end of the street of the girl's dorm, and with the only other asian detective of the precinct too.
Yeonjun and Detective Steve Choi weren't on the same shifts, so they were never properly introduced, all Yeonjun knew was that his real name was Soobin, that no one called him that either and that he'd been a detective for two years already, but had no illustrious cases under his belt.
Well, at least Yeonjun wouldn't need to buy groceries or even cook for at minimum a third of the month, the department would provide him and Detective Choi all they needed and he would have the opportunity to know another korean-american, which wasn't as usual as Yeonjun's family would like. Nothing he couldn't deal with.
Yeonjun was a stupid idiot and he knew it. How do you explain dropping a glass cup on his first day in a case in a rented room when the most important part of your job is to be silent?
In his defense, there wasn't anything he could do besides panic a little once Soobin walked in, a good few inches of height above Yeonjun and with a pair of stupidly cute dimples marking his cheeks as he dropped his suitcase and ditched his jacket, clumsily wiping his hands on his jeans to greet Yeonjun with a shake of hands that came only after he stepped over the broken cup to come closer.
Sargeant Williams ignored the briefing that Captain Kelly gave the morning before Yeonjun moved in the rental, where he ordered the two detectives to meet in the precinct once Soobin clocked in and then go to their room together. Yeonjun had to exhaust his very limited supply of polite and obedient smiles when the Sergeant instructed him to just meet “the other Detective Choi” (as everyone involved in the case were so fond of saying) in the rental, no one would benefit from them to be suspected as a "couple of fairies" on their first day in the new neighborhood. Yeonjun was sure that no one besides the few people he hooked up with along the years knew about his… Sexual inclinations. No one would perceive either of them as gays, thank you very much.
After the two detectives very awkwardly cleaned up Yeonjun's mess, chose their beds out of the two singles in the back of their room, each of them moved to set up their equipment. They would have plenty of time to get to know each other. According to the sloppily put together schedule of one Miss Alba Lombardi, she wouldn't be back from University for the next five hours, but still, Yeonjun threw his partner a once over as stealthily as he could manage in a tiny, two bed suite.
Soobin was for sure a christian, with a cross pendant shining under the yellow lights of the room hanging from a thin golden necklace. He dressed like he was about to go to the morning mass too, with a bottom up black shirt doing wonders for his arms, the sleeves pulled up to let him set up cameras on the two windows of the room. He completed the look with jeans and a black belt, his dress leather shoes were left behind at the room's doorstep.
Handsome and most definitely straight, if the golden band on his ring finger had anything to say. Not many gay guys wasted their time doing police work. Yeonjun had decided before he even knew he was going to be a cop that the closet was a very welcoming place. He had a family that loved him and a job that kept his belly full and roof over his head while he stayed there.
"So, Detective Choi, are you really my cousin or is everyone in the precinct an asshole?", Soobin asked, tilting his head and everything. So that's how he was going to play it? Hot, with a sense of humor and cute, all at the same time? Goddamnit.
"I don't think so," Yeonjun answered with what he hoped wasn't a nervous chuckle. "I'm a second generation kid, my grandparents came after the war. Captain Kelly was very clear when he told me you weren't even born here in America, right?".
Soobin rolled his eyes, making a mess of the equipment box they had to set up, probably trying to find a tape to put in the recorder, something they most definitely wouldn't need any time soon. They were only supposed to do their paperwork before they went to sleep and even then, the tapes were only if they felt like actually writing it all down was dangerous. Yeonjun was sure they wouldn't be in any sort of danger, let alone in enough risk to need to use encrypted tapes.
"Well, Captain Kelly is a stupid cunt and he's wrong. I'm a first generation kid, born in Long Island. My parents weren't born here."
Yeonjun nodded and took pity on the guy, kneeling beside him to help him find the tape. Once it was secured, he handed him to his partner, who stood right over him on the other side of the box. If the equipment wasn't there, it would look kind of indecent to be on his knees in front of a stranger in a rented room. Yeonjun decided to toss away his stupid thoughts with a throwaway question.
"For a man that looks like a youth pastor, you sure like to cuss a lot, Detective Choi," He said, regretting the comment as soon as he got up and looked Soobin in the eyes. The dimpled gentle look was gone and in its place the senior officer had what could only be described as a sarcastic smirk and a weird darkness in his eyes.
"Well, we are all sinners after all," Soobin said, turning around to put the tape in the recorder. Yeonjun took a deep, thick swallow and nodded to himself, grateful that he was given a break from those transformed eyes. "And you can call me Soobin."
Yeonjun wasn't really the believer kind of guy, but he thanked God for his self control. In any other situation, if this wasn't work, he could risk a black eye or even worse to attempt something, anything, with that man. Alas, this was work and he needed to focus on that, so Yeonjun went back to it.
For the next two hours, they took post on each of the two windows of the room, testing their cameras and lenses, the silence having gone for too long for Yeonjun to feel comfortable enough to break it with banter or talk of the weather.
Miss Lombardi solved that for him, arriving on a sleek SVU several hours before the schedule said she was supposed to come, kissing a man goodbye after he circled the car to open the door for her. When he went back to his seat, Yeonjun zoomed in as much as he could and he did not recognize the guy from the case files or even general criminal knowledge. What he knew for sure was that he was at the very least in his forties, surely way too old to be kissing any nineteen year old college student on the lips. He took as many pictures as he could and could hear the shutter going off from Soobin's camera as well.
"Creep alert," mumbled Soobin from his seat, backing up from his camera. "That's Mikhailo Andreev, he's from the Russian side of the town. I highly doubt Alba has permission from her Italian father to be in cahoots with a rival."
Yeonjun wasn't the most knowledgeable when it came to ID'ing the mafia, which only highlighted that Captain Kelly only assigned him this case to punish him and relieve the other, all white detectives of the precinct to have to work with the asian guys. Soobin was a detective for two years already, so he surely should be working on things way more exciting than knowing that a college girl was being groomed by one of her families' rival mafia guys.
Since Alba had gone in and the light of her room was lit under a minute after she closed the front door behind her, there probably wouldn't be much to do besides wait for her to go to sleep and then one of them (probably Soobin, since he was already used to working on the night shift) would stay up to confirm if the schedule was right at least for the time she left for school tomorrow, so Yeonjun decided to make the effort to get close to his partner, for camaraderie or something.
"So… How old are you, Mr Steve?"
Soobin scoffed on his side of the room, getting up from his chair to get his suitcase, pulling out what looked like silk pajamas. Huh.
"Don't call me that and I was born in '70, just last month I became twenty-four. How about you?"
Yeonjun was taken aback, remembering for sure that the file said that Soobin was two years his senior as a detective, so how come he was a year younger than him?
"Hey, are you some kind of prodigy or something? How come you became a detective at twenty-two?"
Soobin shrugged, getting a toiletry bag and a pair of briefs out of his suitcase. "Got in the force as young as I could and pestered as many people as I could for a promotion too. It helped that One Police Plaza wants to get progressive points so they've been promoting a lot of 'colored people', as they say when they think we're not listening. And you didn't tell me your age, Mr Daniel."
Yeonjun decided not to pester him about his vague answer, instead looking back to his camera viewfinder that showed a mostly empty street and the still on light of Alba's room. "I'm twenty-five, born in '69. Guess I'm your hyung then, no?"
It felt wrong to toss an honorific in the middle of the conversation, but it was nice to remember that they could have this sort of relationship, something that the other officers wouldn't really understand.
"I'll have you know, Yeonjun hyung , that I barely speak Korean because my mom did not let me learn it so I wouldn't have an accent and be bullied. Too bad for her, I was bullied anyways and whenever I go to Koreatown or any family meeting they treat me like an outsider, so…"
Yeonjun turned around again, hoping to give Soobin some resemblance of sympathy, but he was already going towards the bathroom.
Well, if Soobin was already oversharing, surely they would be good friends. Or so he hoped.
The next two days went at a snail's pace, with Alba sticking to her schedule faithfully, but always getting picked up and dropped off by the Russian goon. Soobin had explained that he had even less of a role in the Andreev family compared to Alba's father, the one they were hoping to get even a glimpse of in this case. The only entertainment, if one could call it that, that Yeonjun got was learning that Soobin was really, deeply, a strange man.
He got on his knees beside his bed in the two nights they'd been in the rental to pray before going to sleep, but he swore like a sailor and talked with his mouth full, dressing all proper-like but Yeonjun was sure he had to be taking his sweet time on his showers to beat his meat off like a madman. It was the middle of summer, so no one would be taking any hot baths, but he always came out of the bathroom flushed red and avoided eye contact.
Still, Yeonjun did his best to be friendly, feed into idle banter, but there was always a lingering tension between them, the peak of it so far coming when Yeonjun couldn't have a clear view of Mikhailo and Alba as they left in the second morning and Soobin was sure that a third person was in the backseat of the car, telling him to come closer so he could see it through the viewfinder. Their pictures would only be developed in the precinct and they would only see them once they were relieved of their post. Yeonjun came closer, but Soobin didn't leave his seat, gesturing towards the camera.
"What? Want me to sit in your lap?", Yeonjun asked, hoping to come off stern, but Soobin gave him only an eye roll and pulled him down by the nape of his neck, shoving his face on the camera. By the time he focused on anything, the car was already pulling off its parking spot, but Soobin's hand stayed in his nape. Yeonjun stood frozen in his position for two, three breaths and no camera zoom was necessary to see that the car was gone, but Soobin's large and warm hand stayed right there. Once Yeonjun turned his head around, he was sure he was red from the top of his scalp down to his chest and he got a first closer look at Soobin's face, his own heating up in embarrassment and by their shared breaths. He had enough time to observe a few moles dotting his fellow officer's face, the elegant curve of his nose, and how his hair was the exact same shade of brown of his eyes.
"Did you get a good look, Detective?"
Hearing Soobin’s rich, deeper tone right in front of his face was enough to bring Yeonjun down to earth, as he pulled back brusquely while clearing his throat.
"I couldn't see much, Officer".
Yeonjun wanted to smash his head against the window as soon as he answered. Soobin had this thing with referring to Yeonjun by his position rather than his name, but it came naturally for him. For Yeonjun, on the other hand, it came out stilted, like he had to calculate each and every phrase he said around his colleague.
Still, the feel of Soobin's hand on his neck was enough to get him to finally follow his steps and jerk off in the shower as well, later that night, forcing him to take even longer than usual waiting for his face to not be as red as Soobin's always was when he stepped out.
If Detective Steve Choi noticed anything once Yeonjun went back in the room, he didn't say, instead pointing with his chopsticks towards a steaming bowl of ramen on Yeonjun's bedside table.
They didn't exchange a single word until Alba came back from a night of clubbing, the first since they got here, with her dorm friends instead of Creep Mikhailo. Still, to their dismay, Mikhailo came only ten minutes later and they had to keep watching and just take pictures as she greeted him and very quickly they started screaming until Mikhailo slapped her. She cried, Mikhailo seemed to apologize and then she went up to her room with him.
"Couples are weird, right?", asked Soobin after whispering for a few seconds to his cross pendant. Yeonjun noticed that both of them had weirdly grown to care, even just a little, for Alba and her comings and goings, not only because of their job but because she seemed like a nice girl. Too bad not only was she born in a mafia family, she was apparently in love enough to another mafioso to take him up to her room after being assaulted by him.
"I guess you would know more than I do, being married and all", Yeonjun answered, bringing up for the first time the one subject he'd never discussed with Soobin. They'd talked about the academy, superior officers they were willing to shoot, how the paperwork for this case was being a bitch, their parents, everything, but Soobin hadn't mentioned his wife even once.
Having not looked back from the viewfinder, Yeonjun didn't notice the puzzled look on Soobin's face until he was right up in his space, poking him in the cheek. "What?"
"That's my line, actually. What are you talking about?"
Yeonjun raised an eyebrow, turning fully to his side to stare at Soobin after pulling his curtain fully closed, covering his camera lens. He crossed his arms, looked at his fellow officer's ring and then back up at his face. Nevermind that he was once again too close for comfort to a man he barely knew, if he was honest, Yeonjun was annoyed.
Soobin followed his motion, raised his hand and seemed to just now notice the thin golden band on his left ring finger. And then he had the audacity to fully guffaw, laughing a bit too loudly until Yeonjun got up and covered his mouth.
"What the fuck, man, you wanna blow our cover?"
Soobin managed to look fully chastised while still chortling to himself, taking a few steps back until he could sit down on his bed.
"This," he said, pointing at the ring, "is a purity ring. Got it after making a few bad decisions after I got promoted by the suggestion of my Priest. I wouldn't know the first thing about couples, I told you my parents divorced before I could even remember and I never had a girlfriend."
Oh. Okay, then.
"Well, sorry. I assumed you were married and was just being weird about your wife. I hear from a lot of older officers that cheating runs through the profession."
Soobin still had a smile on his face, like he was highly amused by the whole exchange. "Well, I wouldn't know. Not planning to get married any time soon."
Two things didn't let Yeonjun sleep that night. First was the whole purity ring thing. From the way Soobin kept looking at him like Yeonjun was the biggest comedian because of his silly mistake to the whole What do you mean this man wears a purity ring, what has the world done to not deserve him fucking someone like he should? aspect of the whole thing, Yeonjun found himself completely lost. He felt like he was back at square one with his partner and didn't know him at all.
Second was the fact that for the first time since they got in the rented room, Soobin did not go down on his knees to pray beside his bed. He took a shorter shower, dressed like he was alone in the room, which meant he got out of the bathroom wearing only boxer shorts, shirtless. The motherfucker was bent on tempting Yeonjun, that was for sure.
He didn't pray, instead he put his cross necklace on his bedside table, said "Night night, hyung" with the worst pronunciation of the word Yeonjun ever heard in his life and turned his back to him, only putting his blanket over his waist.
Yeonjun didn't want to make things awkward by averting his gaze once he realized Soobin's state of undress, so he kept on looking, giving him a smile once Soobin sat down on the bed to pat his hair dry. His physique wasn't anything out of the ordinary, per se, but there was so much of him to look at. A small waist, broad shoulders, a hairless soft looking chest and a thick happy trail going down his navel.
The closet was safe and still firmly locked, but Yeonjun would always allow himself to appreciate a good looking man when he could get a look.
Back at the academy, in the locker rooms, Yeonjun almost lost his mind with how many dicks and chiseled gym rats he got to see. He wasn't going to risk his career before he even started, so brief looks was all he got, but even then he could just go cruising later that day and usually he did.
Tonight, there was nothing to do, he couldn't leave this room unless he was at death risk.
So he sat there for the whole night, occasionally looking through the camera to see if Mikhailo left, but he never did.
The next morning, Yeonjun's insomnia proved to be useful. For the first time in the so far three days of stake out, Alba's father finally came. His SUV was comically similar to the one Mikhailo had parked just a few buldings after Alba's dorm, which had been a lucky twist of fate. It was very entertaining to see Mikhailo stumble his way down the emergency exit out of Alba’s window while one of Alba's friends welcomed Mr Lombardi and two of his goons inside the building. He gathered the oh so exciting intel that all the girls in the dorm could become useful witnesses because they had to know who Mr Lombardi was, even if he wasn't necessarily at the top of the food chain. As Mikhailo drove off, Yeonjun took the opportunity to wake Soobin up.
This time, he tried not to look too much, but Soobin just. Didn't dress up. He got up from his bed, tried to rub sleep out of his eyes, mumbled the lowest "Good morning" Yeonjun ever heard in his life and went to his seat in front of his camera, his puffy face making him look ten years younger.
"Hey, exhibitionist, you have gunk in your eye," Yeonjun pointed out, trying to stifle a yawn and failing. He hoped Soobin would get the hint and go wash his face and fucking dress up, but he didn't.
"Doesn't matter, you look like three deaths and a half. Go to sleep, I'll keep looking until they leave."
Yeonjun almost argued. He couldn’t go to sleep before doing his paperwork, the Lombardi guy finally showed up and they could finally have a huge break on the case, but still, it wasn’t like Soobin wasn’t right there on his post (with his broad, naked back doing a lot more than justice to Yeonjun’s imagination) and like Captain Bitch would know if he did his job after sleeping and not before. So Yeonjun went to bed, stealing a final look to his partner’s back with much gusto, even if his posture was ass and it made him look weird. He really needed some sleep.
Turns out Yeonjun should’ve followed his orders and done his paperwork before sleeping. If he did, he would’ve gone to bed with a massive headache and grumpier than ever, instead of mildly horny for his unsuspecting partner.
The reward for his recklessness was a ridiculous wet dream, where Soobin kneeled beside Yeonjun’s bed at night, not to pray but to give him a world class blowjob. Yeonjun woke up with a jolt, right before his dream self came all over the adonis at the other side of the room, still with his face glued to the viewfinder of the camera. Yeonjun was mortified to notice that not only did he have a wet dream, but he woke up hard as a rock. And he also woke up to a view of the ceiling, which meant Yeonjun was laying on his back and his boner would be right on Soobin’s view should he decide to turn around for a second.
Still, Yeonjun sat up on his single bed as quietly as possible, grimacing for a second as it creaked as loud as it could. Soobin turned around just in time for Yeonjun to conceal his sins by putting his arms over his lap, looking everywhere but at his partner.
“Morning, sunshine,” Soobin said, sounding way too chipper for someone who had to spend hours sitting uncomfortably over a camera, watching windows and traffic. “My ass hurts like a bitch, so would you be so kind as to go brush your teeth so I can walk around a little? Mr Lombardi is still there.”
Well, there it was. Yeonjun nodded and waited until Soobin turned back to his work to get up, scratching his stomach absent-mindedly.
“Oh, and you can take care of your little problem down there too,” Soobin said just before Yeonjun crossed the bathroom door.
What the fuck?
Yeonjun didn’t want to risk it, but he turned around before thinking about what he was actually doing. As he did, he saw Soobin smiling innocently, like he hadn’t just talked about his work partner’s dick.
“Well, it’s not that little, I guess. I’ve seen smaller.”
Yeonjun full on spluttered, knowing for sure that his face was already on fire out of embarrassment. The fucker on the other side of the room had the gall to wink and shooed him away, as if this wasn’t the most mortifying moment of Yeonjun’s whole life. He made things even worse by saying “Have fun in there!” once Yeonjun slammed the door closed, but hey, at least his dick had gone completely soft.
To give himself a modicum of space, Yeonjun decided to take a shower, running the water as cold as it could get. As he washed himself, all he could think of was what the fuck what is going on is he crazy oh my god over and over again, to the point that he thought he was going to have a mental breakdown or something. Still, he hoped the soap suds would wash away whatever weirdness Soobin created between them. At the end of the day, this wasn’t summer camp, they’re both police detectives investigating some really dangerous people.
Yeonjun wasn’t going to fuck anything up by entertaining the provocations of a man that wears a goddamn purity ring.
Once Yeonjun couldn’t stall anymore, he got out of the bathroom, dressed up in yesterday’s clothes, shivering a bit. He refused to even look in Soobin’s direction and spent the next hour before his partner went out to grab their delivery for the day, ignoring him completely.
He helped Soobin put their groceries away, stealing a can of beer out of their small supply. The other man stayed out of his way and blessedly did not try to attempt a conversation, instead deciding to do push ups in a corner of the room while Yeonjun marked down the hour Mr Lombardi finally left, kissing his daughter goodbye at 6pm on the dot. She left not long after that, another out of schedule outing. He had no other option but to relay that to his partner.
With a sigh and chanting to himself this is work this is work this is work, Yeonjun turned to Soobin and absolutely did not take longer than necessary to speak to gawk at him doing exercise.
“Miss Lombardi left and no one took her by car, she went in the direction of the bus stop, I think.”
Soobin nodded and got up to pick up his radio, relaying the information to the desk detectives keeping up with reports at the precinct.
The sunset came late, almost at 9pm, but once it was all dark, Yeonjun decided to tap off, Alba didn’t seem like she was coming back any time soon. He and Soobin hadn’t exchanged a word since the freak moment when Yeonjun woke up, at least nothing that wasn’t related to work. Still, Yeonjun didn’t miss the fact that his partner took almost an hour long shower and he could swear he heard moans.
The end of this case couldn’t come soon enough.
It was around three in the morning when Yeonjun finally conceded that he wasn’t going to sleep anytime soon, having tossed and turned in bed for the past two hours. Unfortunately, for everyone involved, Yeonjun couldn’t stop thinking about Soobin’s reaction to what was, honestly, the most common occurrence for any man of their age. Waking up with a stiffie wasn’t the end of the world and it was just common courtesy between guys to just ignore it, most of all in a roommate environment.
It made no sense for Yeonjun that a christian straight man would not only bring it up when Yeonjun did all he could to hide it, but also directly tell him to “take care of it”. And talk about the size of his dick too.
When Yeonjun was younger, before he finished the academy, he had a huge complex over his size. As it was, he ended up being pushed into a bottom position in every one of his hook ups, which wasn’t really his decision. His partners just looked at him, decided his size determined he liked it up the ass and turned him around in whatever dark corner they found themselves in. Yeonjun couldn’t remember the last time he had fucked in a bed and honestly, he was sure his landlady suspected him, so he didn’t want to risk getting evicted from his rent controlled apartment for being a homo. Which he was, but she didn’t need to know.
But the funny thing was, he did like it up the ass. To his tight knit group of friends from high school, most of them unaware of his sexuality, Yeonjun was some sort of sex god, suave and flirty, able to get any girl on her knees with a flick of his wrist. In reality, Yeonjun liked to be babied, to be pushed into his hands and knees, then pounded until he couldn’t remember his name.
Soobin surely could provide him that. If he so confidently talked about Yeonjun’s size, he had to be hung, there was no other way. But also, what exactly did he mean with I’ve seen smaller?
Men saw each other naked all the time. At the gym, at school locker rooms, at bathrooms if you were conspicuous enough to take a look at whoever came to take a piss when you did. Still, if you didn’t want to look, you didn’t need to. Soobin not only looked at Yeonjun’s boner, he talked about it like it was nothing.
There was the possibility that Soobin was so damn straight that to him, talking about a dick was the same as talking about the morning news. But to Yeonjun’s starved mind, he let himself think that maybe, just maybe, the snoring man on the bed across the room was interested, even if a little, into fucking guys and then tossing them aside, praying to his God and wearing a damn purity ring like it didn’t mean anything. Fucking a girl out of wedlock was a sin, but fucking a guy wouldn’t be much different than masturbating, right?
Yeonjun listened to Soobin’s snores for one, two, then three minutes, until his dick was throbbing with need just by imagining being plowed to madness by his partner. Soobin was deep asleep, so Yeonjun just shoved his hand down his boxers after spitting into his palm, rapidly creating a rhythm to get done with these thoughts already.
His pumps were quick and effective, he had to bite his lip to stop any sounds from escaping, but anyone would be able to tell what was happening were they listening for it. Still, Yeonjun kept going, imagining it was his partner helping him instead. Soobin had freakishly big hands, so maybe he would need only a few fingers to get the job done, his whole palm would surely cover Yeonjun’s prick completely. The thought pushed Yeonjun into closing his eyes for just a brief moment, curling a bit into himself as it felt good, so good.
But when he opened his eyes, he was met with Soobin’s dark ones looking straight to him, having somehow missed it as he turned around and woke up. He immediately stopped, trying to come up with some sort of excuse or even get confrontational, but Soobin beat him to it.
“Don’t stop, please. I’d like to hear you cum.”
What?
What!
Yeonjun didn’t have anything to say, nothing he could even begin to process, but then he saw it. The movements, quick and short, of Soobin’s arm on his side. He was doing it too.
“Let’s do it together, kitten. Don’t be shy now, you were doing so good just a moment ago.”
Oh fuck, oh my god. Yeonjun was right. Soobin was that type. He did say everyone was a sinner after all. That included himself.
At some deep seated desire within him, Yeonjun found the courage to keep his eyes open as he worked into a new pace, trying to match Soobin’s wrist pumps as he pushed his blanket off. Unfortunately, he had his hands shoved down his underwear just like Yeonjun, so he couldn’t really see much, the room was also dark and it was late. Still, there was no mistake to be made here: he had a lot to be seen under the fabric.
The stunt earlier in the shower, with all the moaning, had to be just for show, because as they both reached their peaks, Yeonjun got increasingly louder, huffing, puffing and mewling, while Soobin stayed dead silent. With a final crazed thought that he could make him moan if he was riding his partner, Yeonjun came with a long low moan, watching as he melted in his pillow to Soobin keep it going for just a little longer, following suit with one short grunt.
Not knowing what to do, Yeonjun kept his hand where it was, soiled with what had to be a dreamy fantasy, turning over to stare at the ceiling, still slightly out of breath. He hadn’t done much, but he was exhausted. After a whole night of walking around eggshells, Yeonjun had just had a masturbation session with Soobin, the religious guy he was supposed to work with for just a few days and then never see again.
Not five minutes later, he fell asleep.
Yeonjun woke up feeling way less disgusting than he was supposed to. He was already regretting going to sleep covered in cum, even if it had been unintentional, when he noticed that he wasn't, in fact, covered in any of it.
Instead, he sat up to notice a few things:
One, he wasn’t in his bed. Two, this wasn’t the pair of boxers he went to sleep in last night. Three, Soobin took the liberty to clean up his goddamn dick and change his underwear in the middle of the night. Four, Soobin wasn’t in the room.
His gun and badge were still on the rack right beside Yeonjun’s, so probably nothing related to the case happened that required him to leave. Still, they had very clear orders: No one leaves the room unless it’s a life or death situation, only Soobin was to go a few stories down everyday around midday to pick up their food and supplies. Yeonjun took a quick look at the clock in Soobin’s bedside table to see that it was 9am, so Soobin shouldn't be anywhere besides the bathroom or prostrated in front of his camera.
Yeonjun confirmed that he was nowhere to be found once he went to the bathroom, with the door left ajar and the lights off. He decided no to dwell on it, he actually appreciated that he would have a bit of time to think about what the fuck he was going to do once Soobin came back. He heard the door open when he was almost done with his shower, still having felt a bit dirty from the whole affair of the night before.
What he didn’t expect was for Soobin to come into the bathroom, opening the cabinet under the sink to leave something there. Yeonjun fortunately had closed the shower curtains, but still, in the past four days, Soobin had been polite and respected his space considering they weren’t much more than strangers being pushed into being roommates suddenly.
It took Yeonjun real effort to pat himself dry and just go back to his room, but once he did, Soobin was going off on his camera, the shutter sounds even surprising him a bit. Right, they were two police officers in the middle of a case, not two guys hooking up in a resort in Key West. The least of his worries should be what to do after what they did last night. Alba hadn’t come back to her dorm for the whole night.
“Is she here?”, Yeonjun asked, trying to find something to wear before Soobin finished collecting his intel.
“Yeah, she came with another Andreev guy, not Mikhailo. And she looks bad, like, really bad.”
Yeonjun left his clothes and went to his camera, only covered in his towel, but his job was his priority. Soobin wouldn’t try anything now, would he? Considering he only acted up in the middle of the night, protected by the dark, Yeonjun concluded that no, he probably wouldn’t.
As he took a look in his viewfinder, all thoughts about Soobin went out the window, seeing the state Alba was in. The Andreev goon looked like he was annoyed as one of Alba’s friends came to collect her, immediately breaking into hysterics once she saw her friend. Alba looked like a car had run her over, with her clothes all torn up and blood running down her nose.
“What the fuck happened?” Yeonjun asked, not to anyone in particular, but Soobin answered. Right on his ear.
“I don’t know, but we should report this, right?” he asked back, all over Yeonjun’s personal space, burying his nose on Yeonjun’s neck while he tried to keep taking pictures.
“Stop, what the hell are you doing, man?” Yeonjun chastised, but he was quickly losing his resolve as Soobin took whiff after whiff of his smell, nose all over his neck and the back of his ear, his lips ghosting over each spot as well.
“What does it seem like I’m doing? The one can of beer you drank yesterday surely didn’t make you forget what we did last night, right?”
Yeonjun was about to melt back into Soobin, telling himself that it was fine because Alba had walked in and the goon had left, on foot, just like she had last night, but as he was about to turn around, give in into whatever this thing between him and Soobin was becoming, they were both startled by their radio static going off, followed by the voice of the last person they wanted to hear right now:
Speaking from the 89th precinct, this is Captain Kelly speaking, can you hear me Detective Choi One, over?
Fucking hell. The detectives involved in the case had decided to call them Detective Choi One and Detective Choi Two, as if it saved them any time compared to just saying their full names. Now it had spread to their goddamn Captain as well. Yeonjun could kill him right now and it barely had anything to do with the fact that he was about to kiss Soobin and was interrupted. Barely.
Soobin took a deep sigh, but made his intentions clear by giving Yeonjun a quick, fleeting kiss on his cheek as he gestured to him to go get dressed. Yeonjun obeyed.
“Daniel and I hear you loud and clear Sir, over.”
Soobin had picked up the radio, looking directly at Yeonjun as he dressed. It wasn’t like he hadn’t seen him naked just last night. Life was unfair.
We’ll have to change a few things around. We had two officers follow Alba last night as she went off schedule as you reported, Steve, and she went straight into Andreev territory. We have reasons to believe she and her father are selling Lombardi information to the russians, or at the very least she is. Whatever it was, she came back looking like that, I’m sure you guys have seen her just now, right?
Soobin was barely paying attention to the Captain, having beckoned Yeonjun over once he was done getting dressed, circling one of his damn giant hands on his waist as their superior officer prattled off.
“Yes Sir, she was beat pretty bad, wasn’t she?”
Yeonjun kept his mouth shut and tried to look anywhere but into Soobin’s eyes as he caressed his waist, his eyes playful and his mouth twisted in a depraved grin. This was wrong on many different levels, most of all because a civilian was clearly in danger, being the daughter of a mafioso or not.
Yes she was, Detective. Which means we’ll move you guys. First floor, Room A-9. If anything happens, I want you guys to be able to get to her and the other girls in the dorm quickly. Your drop off is already there, from now on you pick it up in the lobby and I want at least one of you up 24/7, take turns sleeping and what not. Understood?
“Understood Captain. Do we move immediately?”
Yes, Detective.
Soobin was about to sign off and get back to business, but the Captain interrupted him.
Oh, just a heads up.
Soobin rolled his eyes, expecting some sort of reaction from Yeonjun, but he was too mortified by the idea that they would seriously hook up when the conversation was over to feel anything but panic. Soobin seemed to find it amusing.
“Go ahead, Sir.”
We left other cameras already set up, other officers were occasionally using the room to corroborate intel, you know how it goes.
No, it doesn’t go like that. Both Yeonjun and Soobin stood up straighter, surprised by the information. Of course they themselves were being surveilled. You can never trust the asians, sometimes they could be spies, or so older officers said.
The cameras are mounted higher so you guys can have a better angle, there will be lots of standing up, I’m sorry.
Oh no, he definitely wasn’t.
Ah, also, since the other officers never really stayed for longer than a few hours, we didn’t have a reason to prepare two beds and it will be way too suspicious if we do it now. I hope it isn’t too much of a hassle, but you guys aren’t supposed to sleep together, so I think it will be fine. Right?
“Of course Sir, it won’t be a problem. We’ll keep an ear out, over.”
Yeonjun knew that Captain Kelly didn’t mean anything by “you guys aren’t supposed to sleep together”, but it still sent shivers down his spine. As he and Soobin packed their bags, picked up the necessary equipment and said goodbye to the room, Yeonjun came to a conclusion: whatever stupid thing they were about to do earlier was not on the cards. They had to stop immediately.
Yeonjun was amused and relieved that hours upon hours of standing up was beating Soobin’s ass. He probably wasn’t used to it anymore, tied to a desk for the past two years. Yeonjun, on the other hand, had just been promoted, so he was fine, having a good time even. He would stay away from that queen sized bed for as long as possible.
Soobin had the courtesy to leave him alone until Alba left for college, but once he reported her departure, Yeonjun had to come up with a hundred excuses to keep him occupied and away. He didn’t have any more.
“There’s no reason for both of us to keep on the look out when she’s not even home, Yeonjun. My back is killing me right now man, cut me some slack.”
Yeonjun didn’t move from his position, eye firmly positioned on the viewfinder. “Go to sleep then,” he said, gesturing back towards the bed. He would be exhausted by morning, but at least it would give him some good six hours to think about how to end this whole cat and mouse situation.
“Look, if you don’t wanna fuck me that’s fine, but you don’t need to to this. I thought we were on the same page.”
Yeonjun schooled his expression to be as cool about this as possible. Emotion in a situation like this wouldn’t help anyone. Besides, there were no emotions anyways. He and Soobin were coworkers and that was it.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Detective. Do what you please, if you’re not going to sleep, then I’ll happily take your place.”
Soobin arched an eyebrow. Opened his mouth, closed it and then deflated. He looked small for a second, soft even dressed in a wife beater and jeans. Yeonjun was going to regret this deeply once the case was over.
“Sorry, I must have misread a few signals. Go to bed, I’ll keep an eye out.”
Yeonjun went to bed feeling like he had made a mistake, and a big one at that. Still, he wasn’t going to risk getting walked in suddenly by another officer gagging on Soobin’s dick while he was on duty. It just wasn’t right.
By the sixth night of the case, Yeonjun was about to climb up the walls. His showers were taking longer and longer, that night in the previous room still echoing loud and clear in his mind.
For fuck’s sake, Soobin had called him kitten. He said I’d like to hear you cum.
The past two days had been straight business. Mikhailo hadn’t shown up anymore, Alba seemed to be focused on school, only leaving her dorm for that, no dramatic altercation between the Andreevs and the Lombardis had happened as far as the police knew. Soobin was mostly silent, keeping to himself, assuming that if he reported the non-news to the precinct officers loud enough, he didn’t need to communicate with his partner at all.
Yeonjun had been fine with that until he wasn’t. Soobin had gone back to praying, kneeling by the bed when Yeonjun relieved him from camera duties, muttering to himself about needing forgiveness for his transgressions and his carnal desires. It made Yeonjun feel a bit smug that he was a good enough piece of ass to reduce a man of faith to that level of desperation.
But the truth was, out of the two of them, Soobin was definitely the biggest sinner. His showers were noisy again, he came out of the bathroom proudly showing off his blush originated from his pleasure. No matter how hard he prayed, he was the one constantly provoking Yeonjun, taciturn, silent, but dressing ridiculously, totally inappropriate while walking around the room in his undies alone. If Yeonjun was enough of a jerk, he could report him for sexual harassment.
But Yeonjun wasn’t. And his resolve was quickly dying.
He had woken up over half an hour ago, but he stayed in bed, watching Soobin read as he sat beside his window. There were many facts about Soobin that Yeonjun had learned in the past six days: He was undeniably handsome, walking a fine line between a cute boy next door and the daddy doms he saw in the gay clubs. As much as he was a hypocrite about his faith, he was honestly dedicated to it, reading the bible daily and praying for Alba as she seemed to recuperate from the assault suffered in the past days. He had no sense of fashion, cycling between button ups and wife beaters, jeans and slacks, whenever he bothered to dress up. And, worst of all, he seemed lonely now that they weren’t talking. He seemed to thrive in human connection, taking longer than necessary to relay his reports to the point of being admonished for it.
And he also wasn’t stupid.
“If you’re going to keep staring at me like a lovesick schoolgirl, why did you push me away?”
Yeonjun ignored him, resolute in avoiding Soobin like he wasn't staring like he said. He assumed he wouldn’t get caught, Soobin always seemed to float off when he was reading. He had caught him rereading the same page of a book multiple times, but he still kept focused on the book and the book alone. Or so he thought.
Yeonjun had decided to go back to sleep, it was past midnight and he probably hadn’t slept for more than two hours before pulling himself back from the beginnings of a nightmare where Captain Kelly came barging in on them fucking in that same couch Soobin was laying right now, but before he could even close his eyes, Soobin turned the lamp beside his couch off and then, Yeonjun felt the bed dip.
Oh, this would end up badly.
“I’m not done sleeping, detective, wait until at least six please,” Yeonjun said, pulling the blanket up to his nose. Still, Soobin ignored him, instead plastering his body all over Yeonjun’s back. “Seriously, we can’t sleep at the same time like Cap-”.
He couldn’t finish. As Yeonjun tried to turn around to literally kick Soobin off of the bed, the younger officer cupped his jaw and just jammed his tongue in Yeonjun’s mouth, stealing his breath and his words.
For a few seconds, Yeonjun tried to fight. He slammed his fists against Soobin’s bare chest as the other man made him fully turn around, he tried to pry his mouth away from the sloppy kisses, he tried not to moan at the taste of Soobin’s tongue, but it was too late. Before he knew it, he was kissing back, his belly warming up, his lips prying open willingly, swallowing the breath of relief as Soobin deepened the kiss, using a well trained tongue to try to eat away all of Yeonjun’s anxieties over whatever this was.
“I didn’t come here to sleep, hyung,” Soobin whispered in Yeonjun's ear as they kicked the bed covers down, pausing for a second to nip lightly at Yeonjun’s increasingly feverish neck. “I came here to fuck you like I know you want me to.”
Yeonjun couldn’t help but moan, desperate, at what seemed like a deep revelation. Soobin put his beautiful, carved by the gods hands on each of Yeonjun’s cheeks, taking a deep look at his eyes. It felt like he was asking something. You want me to stop? Can I give you what you want?
It all seemed earnest, sincere, like this wasn’t going to be just sex. Yeonjun wasn’t one to fall in love, but this was more than attraction. With his heart in his sleeve, he nodded. He gave Soobin his permission.
Soobin smiled, his dimples appearing for the first time in a long while, kissing Yeonjun all over right after. His face, his nose, the corners of his lips, his jaw, as Yeonjun swallowed a plea.
I’m begging you to fuck me until I scream.
Of course, he couldn’t. Yeonjun was going to be good, silent, he couldn’t blow their covers. But he was going to savor each of these moments.
“I’m gonna go grab a few things and you’re going to get undressed for me while I'm gone, okay?”
Huh? Yeonjun was lost in a spiral of fuck me bite me lick me do what you want with my body to really listen, so Soobin had to shake him a bit, bring him back to earth for a second.
“Kitten, listen to me,” He said again, pulling one of Yeonjun’s hands down to his own waistband. “Take all your clothes off and wait a second for me, okay?”
Yeonjun didn’t trust his ability to speak, so he nodded excitedly, pulling a growl down from Soobin’s throat as he gave him another kiss.
Past lovers had described him as soft, wide-eyed, innocent-like, even while Yeonjun was sitting down on a cock. He never really understood it, how could someone be innocent while fucking like a rabbit, but he took it as a complement. Soobin seemed to like it so far.
Yeonjun was quick to take his pajamas off, pulling one of the blankets from the floor to cover his crotch, so he could let Soobin peel at least one layer off.
He came back from the bathroom with two things in his hands: a pack of condoms and a bottle of lube. So that was what he left to get the day after we did… All that.
“I’m guessing those didn’t come with the room, right?” Yeonjun asked, gasping when Soobin ignored him and pulled him down by his shins, pulling his waist towards the edge of the bed. He pushed the blanket off unceremoniously and then oh my god he went down on his knees on the floor, tossing the condoms and lube aside to swallow Yeonjun down, slobbering all over his cock like he was hungry for it.
“It isn’t as small as I thought, hm?” he said, taking a deep breath through his nose, inhaling Yeonjun’s musk as he nosed his trimmed, dark pubic hair.
Yeonjun had nothing to say, instead he tossed his head back, grabbing a handful of Soobin’s thick curls and pushing his head deeper, asking for more. Soobin gave him just that, taking each of Yeonjun’s balls in his mouth before going down on his dick again, his hands all over, squeezing thighs, ass cheeks, a pec and all he could touch. Which was everything.
“Ah, Soobin-ah, hyung feels so good,” Yeonjun let escape, all in Korean, watching mortified as Soobin pulled back with a wicked grin on his mouth, his lips shiny from spit and precum.
“Damn, changed your language settings with my tongue alone, huh? Hope it was all good stuff.”
Yeonjun nodded curtly, feeling his cheeks grow warm. Soon, Soobin got up and spread Yeonjun's legs as far as they would go, grabbing the lube bottle.
“How long since your last time, kitten?”
Yeonjun mulled the question over, deciding not to feel embarrassed with the honest answer. “With someone else, like a dick up my ass? A good year or so. I did finger myself in the shower yesterday, though.”
Soobin had that mean grin on his face again. With his free hand, he grabbed one of Yeonjun’s, raising it up to his face, pulling Yeonjun to a sitting position.
“These?” he asked, hypothetically. Yeonjun nodded and moaned when Soobin licked his palm and then sucked two fingers into his mouth, working them over just like he had done with Yeonjun’s dick, his head bobbing back and forth. He pulled back with an unnecessary pop of his lips, reveling at the look Yeonjun was giving him, pure lust written all over his face. “These are nothing compared to what you’re about to get, kitten.”
Yeonjun was sure of that, but nothing could prepare him from seeing it anyway. Soobin was indeed hung. Big, like Yeonjun had never seen before, maybe in a magazine or two he’d seen somewhat close. This was another level. Soobin took a step back and welcomed Yeonjun to look, so he came closer, getting his hands on the throbbing dick as soon as he could. It was heavy, hot, surrounded by coarse black hair, the most intimidating thing Yeonjun had ever seen. He wanted to get it in his mouth.
“Go ahead, but don’t hurt yourself.”
Okay, Yeonjun was fond of the whole kitten thing or whatever, but if Soobin thought he was some pillow princess, he was in for a wild ride. He took a few tentative licks, smiling to himself as the bitter taste of precum filled his mouth, careful not to use his teeth and then seem like an inexperienced teenager. Yeonjun took his time, licking the head first, swirling his tongue around it, looking up at Soobin as he pulled him back by the hair to fully kick off his underwear. Only when Soobin took his face in his hands again, his left thumb dancing over Yeonjun’s full lips before pushing it inside his mouth, did Yeonjun notice something. Looking up, he could still see the faint glow of his partner's cross pendant, the thin necklace elegant around his neck. But the purity ring was nowhere to be found, so Yeonjun made a point to spit the thumb out and instead he sucked in his ring finger, holding the thick wrist of the god in front of him with both hands. If Soobin looked like he was about to devour him before, now he looked like he was going to be messy with it too.
“Fuck me, kitten, oh my god.”
Yeonjun wanted to say something along the lines of That’s the idea, but suddenly he had his mouth full, fuller than before. Soobin had pulled his wrist back and pushed the monster between his legs down Yeonjun’s throat, as deep as it could go. Yeonjun welcomed the burn of his jaw being forced to unhinge so quickly, feeling his eyes water, keeping his eyes up as much as possible as Soobin tried with all his might to make him take deep and fast. As much as they both would’ve liked it, Yeonjun was indeed not that experienced in the field and the sheer size of Soobin’s cock made it almost tip into painful, but not fun territory.
Yeonjun made himself heard quickly, scratching at Soobin’s chest until he pulled him back by the hair with a vice grip, all ten of his fingers tangled up in Yeonjun’s darker, longer locks.
“We’ll work on it, don’t worry.”
At this point in time, nothing would have made Yeonjun stop the whole ordeal to explain to Soobin that no, he wasn’t going anywhere after this case was over. They could have four more days, possibly a bit longer, but then it would be done. Police officers didn’t have time to date, let alone have gay relationships. It was already bad enough that they were the only two non-white officers in their precinct.
Instead, Yeonjun let himself be pushed back towards the pillows, grinning as Soobin fumbled with the condom package before sliding it over his length.
“I’m going to get you ready now, okay?”
There was nothing else for Yeonjun to do besides nod and spread his legs, so he did, telling himself to relax or otherwise this would be a disaster.
“It’s okay if you can’t take the whole thing in your first try, not many people can.”
Yeonjun’s mind was flooded with questions. Why the fuck would Soobin be wearing a purity ring if he had stuck his dick up enough people’s holes to have a range of experiences? As curious as he was, Yeonjun had no time to dwell on the matter, as Soobin pushed one of his legs up and up, until he had his knee pressed up to his shoulder.
“Tell me if it hurts, kitten.”
A complaint went up to the tip of Yeonjun’s tongue. I’m not a fragile princess, goddamnit, but Soobin shut him up by circling a digit around Yeonjun’s hole, wet and cold with lube. Then he went in, thrusting it up to the first knuckle, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. One finger barely in and Yeonjun was already needing to watch his breathing, almost everything about Soobin was big, so big, that when he had two fingers up to where his palm met Yeonjun's perineum, Yeonjun was already biting his own hand, relieved that hadn’t been a brat and complained about not needing to go slow. He absolutely did.
Soobin looked very, very pleased with himself. “It’s too bad we’re not home or somewhere else private. I wish I could make you scream.”
Okay, fuck that.
“Yeah, you wish. No man ever made me scream.”
It was fascinating to watch Soobin’s eyes darken ever so slightly, taking it as a taunt like he should. “We’ll see.”
Once again, Yeonjun thought for a split of a second that he couldn’t actually make him scream. They could blow their cover and get screwed over by Captain Kelly, but Soobin seemed to forget it. Not two minutes later and he had four fingers up Yeonjun’s hole, swallowing his pained and pleasured mewls with his tongue, spit dripping down Yeonjun’s jaw without a care.
“Are you ready, kitten?”
This time, Yeonjun didn’t bother to even nod. He just pushed Soobin’s hand off, grabbing the lube bottle to squirt a thin line of it over Soobin’s neglected cock. He pumped it once, twice, watching Soobin’s neck veins become prominent, his hairline already damp with sweat.
Yeonjun gave Soobin one more kiss, a chaste one on his lips, savoring the fullness of them before turning around to get on his knees.
Or, well, before he tried to turn around, that was.
“What are you doing, hm?”
Soobin looked confused, holding to Yeonjun’s waist like his life depended on it.
“I’ll get on my knees, what’s wrong?”
Yeonjun wasn’t scared of Soobin, not for one second, but he did look dangerous, for one fleeting moment. “Not a chance in hell, kitten,” he muttered, pushing Yeonjun down on his back once more, helping him circle his toned legs around the younger’s waist. “I’m gonna fuck you like this and you’ll look at me until we’re done, you hear me?”
As he discovered himself as a gay man, Yeonjun had many firsts. A first kiss, his first blowjob, the first quickie in the bathroom of a club, all of them remarkable in their own ways. He’d never, ever been fucked face to face, not even in his longer relationships. It was too much work, requiring strength from his top and flexibility on both parties. Yeonjun could die right now and be happy.
Well, not right now. He needed to be thoroughly fucked first.
“Give me your worst.”
With one final grin, Soobin positioned himself, one hand holding the bed frame above Yeonjun’s head and another firmly planted beside his head, holding his weight up as he slid in, inch by inch.
The prep didn’t do much and Yeonjun was crying by the time Soobin was halfway through. Soobin kept shushing him, leaning down to kiss him in the cheek, to lick his tears and start over, pulling all the way back and then pushing in again. They slowly worked up a back and forth pace, as Yeonjun waited patiently for the pain to turn into bliss.
It took a while, as Soobin whispered sweet nothings to the stuffy air of the room, both of them dripping in sweat, Yeonjun gripping to his partner’s bicep like a lifeline. Then, after Yeonjun had gone soft, the pain almost unbearable, Soobin pushed just that tiny bit further and there it was.
Yeonjun arched his back up from the bed, his eyes shooting open with a teenie, tiny shout, one that had Soobin lowering his hand from the frame to shut him up.
“Did I find it?”
There was no way that Soobin wouldn’t find Yeonjun’s sweet spot with his size, but Yeonjun still showed his appreciation, shaking his head side to side until Soobin lifted his hand back, taking no time before sucking as many fingers as he could take in to muffle his sounds.
From then on, it was heaven. Soobin knew what he was doing, rocking his hips back and forth first in short, shallow thrusts, but soon the harsh sound of skin slapping skin was echoing across the room, forcing Yeonjun to raise his arms and hold the bed frame so the force of the thrusts wouldn't make him bash his head against it.
“Does it feel good, hm?” Soobin asked, over and over, a crazed look in his eyes slowly melting into an adoring one, as Yeonjun sobbed into his fingers, wanting to push him away and somehow pull him inside his chest, having Soobin living in his ribcage, a part of him forever.
Sex was good, most of the time. Very rarely, sex was exceptional. Today, Yeonjun was having an out of body experience, holding his orgasm back with all his might as Soobin kept going and going and going, grunting and growling low in his throat.
“I’m- Fuck, I’m close,” Soobin murmured against Yeonjun’s cheek, and Yeonjun wanted to follow him suit, lowering one of his hands to his achingly hard dick, precum ropes flying every which way as they kept their animalistic pace. Soobin didn’t seem to like it, slapping it away, pausing for a moment before grabbing Yeonjun by the waist and turning them around. Now, Yeonjun was on top, sitting down on that gigantic dick, his cock nestled up against his stomach.
“No, no. I’ll do it.”
Yeonjun couldn’t find the strength to ask what Soobin was talking about, instead positioning himself better on his knees, having them either side of Soobin’s waist. It was good that they only got to this position by the end of it all, because as soon as Yeonjun went up and then back down once, he knew he wouldn’t last like this. When Soobin put his hand (the one where the goddamn purity ring was, not even an hour ago) around Yeonjun’s neglected cock, he was done for. He crumbled on top of Soobin, not able to get going anymore, instead only grinding into his partner’s massive length until he came, hiding his face between Soobin’s pecs, biting into one of them as Soobin whispered My turn now, hugging Yeonjun tight as he planted both of his feet to the bed and brutalized him, thrust after thrust, each of them so fast and punishing to his prostate that Yeonjun got to the brink of passing out, his vision going white, before he felt the faint warmth of Soobin spilling inside him, protected by the condom.
As soon as it all started, it was over. Yeonjun had a lot to say, maybe to ask for a second round, but as he smiled into Soobin’s neck, they were both startled by a loud bang.
They took one, two breaths, and then another bang came.
And then they heard the screams.
All things considered, Yeonjun expected way worse than what they got.
Alba Lombardi was shot dead in her room at around 3h45am, by her own father, Gianni Lombardi, before he shot himself. If Yeonjun and Soobin were doing their jobs, instead of having sex, they would’ve seen him arriving, gun in hand, as a witness told Sargeant Williams the next morning.
Apparently, Alba wasn’t willingly selling information to Mikhailo, who was found dead three days later, along with many other Andreev goons. She was just a reckless nineteen year old girl that got tricked by her much older boyfriend into being a snitch. It had started with just locations, Anna May, her roommate, told the police. Then Mikhailo asked for more, more, until Alba had to tell her father why so many Lombardis and associated people were turning up dead in their own territory. The day she came back with her nose broken, she had gone to warn Mikhailo that her father planned to kill him that night. After that, it took a couple of days of setting things into place, but while Yeonjun and Soobin were fucking, the higher ups finally were informed that they had snitches between them. Fabrizio Lombardi, the Italian godfather, apparently didn’t take it very well and asked for Alba’s head.
In the end, her own father took care of it, even after pleading for forgiveness if his three missing fingers were anything to go by. They punished him and then he sneaked away to kill his own daughter and himself.
Captain Kelly said he was relieved, before taking both Yeonjun and Soobin’s gun and badges. Those two deaths were a minor tragedy in what could have become a full blown out war between two factions.
Yeonjun wanted to cry as he watched Soobin whisper to his pendant until their suspensions were processed and signed.
Please, God, have mercy for Alba’s soul. She was only a child.
In many ways, Yeonjun thought that God did have mercy for her. She died quickly, one shot to the head, as she was asleep on her side as her father came in. If the Lombardis had gotten a hold of her, she would’ve undoubtedly been tortured for hours, maybe days, as they made Gianni watch and then finish her.
After the final paperwork was signed, Soobin and Yeonjun were suspended for a month, their overtime was canceled for a year and all of New York’s finest would know that they were both queers. Before Soobin left, Yeonjun saw him put his purity ring back. They probably would never speak to each other again.
Yeonjun was used to being wrong about many things since he met Soobin.
He had been convinced that his fellow officer was straight. Wrong.
No straight man would fuck another man like Soobin did that night.
He told his mom and believed it that his career was done for as he cried on her lap, doing what he could to tiptoe around the fact that he got a girl killed because he was having sex with another man. Wrong.
He was transferred from the 89th precinct as soon as his suspension ended, Captain Kelly didn’t even give him the courtesy to do it himself. Instead, he was posted on the 4th precinct, not too far from his apartment. The reason behind Yeonjun and his partner’s suspension was sealed on the case records, only the team involved knew about it and miraculously, it didn’t spread like rapid fire. Detective Kamal assured Yeonjun that the whole “let’s look inclusive” policy was probably protecting him, at least for now, after he found Yeonjun crying in the bathroom for the sixth time in a row. Yeonjun accepted the fact that he was never going to rise on the ranks any time soon, but at least he kept his job.
His last assumption had been made as he watched Soobin leave the 89th precinct on that cursed morning: they were never going to see each other again.
Turns out, a twist of faith brought them back together. Detective Kamal, Yeonjun’s deskmate, had made it his mission to lift his colleague’s spirit, as they were two gay closeted cops in a cesspool of bigots. No wonder Yeonjun was sent straight to the other precinct that needed more “colored representation”. As it were, they navigated the most discreet gay bars of New York City. No one could know they were cops, sure, but why would anyone need that information when you just wanted to suck face with a stranger?
Almost a whole year after his transfer, Yeonjun was dead set in ending his dry spell. He did make out here and there and he almost ended up in Kai Kamal’s bed, but chickened out because he wasn’t ready.
Yeonjun almost made it weird, but Kai was dead set in making their relationship work, citing “gay solidarity”, so they kept going out as platonic friends and nothing more. Tonight, he and Kai were going to a new bar, Barracuda, that promised a drag queen night and cheap booze.
Yeonjun dressed up, with leather pants and smokey-eyed makeup, but less than two minutes into the club, he saw him. He saw Soobin, saying something to Kai in the bar as the music pounded in Yeonjun’s ears.
Heartbroken and maybe even a bit traumatized (cop insurance didn’t cover therapy), Yeonjun tried with all his might to forget Soobin. He really did. All his repressed feelings hit him like a bullet to the back once their eyes met. Before Yeonjun knew it, he was calling a cab outside as he heard Soobin call for him, leaving a confused Kai behind.
He climbed into the first car he saw before Soobin could reach him.
“You need to talk to him, I swear he’s gonna drive me crazy with his calls.”
Three weeks after almost meeting Soobin again, Yeonjun was tired of asking Kai to drop it before he shot himself in the head. Soobin was calling Kai’s house every night at 8pm, pleading with him to make Yeonjun just go out for a coffee date. He wanted to apologize, or so Kai claimed.
He could choke on a cup of burning hot poison for all Yeonjun cared about.
“Seriously, my mom thinks I’m fucking Soobin because he keeps calling and he’s my goddamn cousin.”
Yeonjun shot Kai an alarmed look, reminding him that they were in the precinct break room. Anyone could hear them.
“Shit, sorry,” Kai mumbled, glancing around the room to make sure no one heard anything. Once he was sure they were on the clear, he leaned into Yeonjun’s space to whisper in his ear. “I swear to God, I’m going to kill both of you if y’all don’t cut this shit out. He’s already mad at me because I didn’t tell him you’re my partner, but how the hell would I know all that shit you talked about involved him? He only came out to me last month.”
So Soobin was out. Yeonjun wondered if he still wore a purity ring.
“He was so damn depressed since he was suddenly transferred last year, but he didn’t tell me why, so I couldn't put two and two together. You should talk to him,” Kai went back to his seat once Yeonjun gave him a murderous look, taking a sip of his coffee before finishing his train of thought. “Just to give yourself closure, you know? You’re not going to get married, it’s just fucking coffee.”
Yeonjun took a bite of his shitty sandwich and ignored Kai again.
The next shift, Yeonjun came in a little late and Kai had already left for some field work. In his desk was a note and an envelope. The note was in Kai’s writing. The envelope, he didn’t recognize, but it looked like the scribbles of a first-grader in grammatically incorrect hangul.
Kai’s note simply said “Went off without you, bastard. The envelope’s delivery for you”, with a heart drawn at the bottom.
Yeonjun took a seat and assessed the envelope. The writing was difficult to figure out, but it attempted to say I miss you a lot.
Once Yeonjun opened the envelope, he had to run to the bathroom to cry again.
There was no letter, nothing written on the inside. Just a golden ring, a thin band that he remembered very, very well. It took Yeonjun almost an hour to calm down and another of acting like he was doing paperwork back in his desk to make a decision. Kai came back right before their time to clock out and Yeonjun didn’t even greet him, instead blurting out “I’ll meet your stupid cousin tomorrow, fax me the hour and place. It's my day off.”
Yeonjun wanted to forget the whole thing once he got the address. He was meeting Soobin the next afternoon in Lombardi’s Coffee & Bakery, two streets down from Alba’s old dorm.
Yeonjun was a firm believer in being fashionably late, but he was jittery with nerves as soon as he was done dressing up for his… Date, so he was unpleasantly surprised to see that Soobin had already found himself a table at the coffee shop, blowing into a cup of a steaming something forty whole minutes before they were supposed to meet. He barely had time to notice his new hair cut, with his nape and the sides of his head shaved down while the top curls were falling down his eyes, the lighting of the shop making it look pitch black instead of dark brown, before Soobin saw him and smiled so wide it went up to his stupidly big ears. Yeonjun hadn’t dreamt even once of holding those like a steering wheel while Soobin sucked him off. Obviously.
He marched down to the table, briefly stopping to greet the barista behind the shop's counter back, wiping his polite smile off of his face as soon as he sat in front of Soobin.
They stared at each other for too long, way past the comfort zone, until Soobin cleared his throat and tried to talk. “Did you understand my no-”
Yeonjun cut him off by slamming a hand down the table, startling Soobin and a few other customers. “I just came to return this.”
As Yeonjun pulled his hand back, he left behind the ring. He had it in a vice grip since he left home and it felt like it had burned a hole on his palm. Soobin still had a tentative smile even after Yeonjun’s little outburst, but his expression melted into one of disappointment.
“Seriously? I thought that you-”
“I don’t care what you thought,” Yeonjun interrupted once again, feeling awful but determined to end this once and for all so he could move on. So he could finally heal. “I don’t know what you want from me, but whatever it is, you won’t get it. You made it very clear to me where you stood, when you didn’t bother to say goodbye after almost getting me fired.”
It was delightful to see the kicked puppy act completely fizzle out as Soobin got angry, his look more resembling of the one he had on his face when Yeonjun spurred him on, in that fucking night in the rental. Room A-9 was forever going to be Yeonjun’s biggest mistake and regret.
“I didn’t do shit to you. You gave me permission, we had sex, I didn’t force you. It’s already bad enough that I wake up in a fucking panic every other night because of my guilt over…” He looked around, stopping himself just before saying Alba’s name out loud. This place was the oddest choice, for sure. Soobin lowered his voice down to a whisper. “Over you-know-what. But you can’t pin this on me. You know you flirted with me, you know you kissed me back, you know you loved it all and that you want more. That you need more.”
Yeonjun smirked, sarcastic, letting Soobin simmer in his own ridiculousness while he beckoned a waitress over. He ordered an iced americano and a croissant. At least he was getting a free meal out of this mess.
“What the fuck?” Soobin exclaimed, exasperated as Yeonjun looked around the shop, doing everything he could not to look him in the eyes. “Why did you even come here if you don’t want to-”
“What, Soobin, don’t want to what?” Yeonjun missed the weight of his gun on his waist, but he never carried it with him on the weekends. Having it now would weirdly give him some reassurance. “You thought that after a whole year of crying over you, feeling like shit because I didn’t mean enough for you to warrant a goddamned goodbye when I thought my life was over because you couldn’t take no for an answer, that I would sneak back to the bathroom and give you a reach-around, huh?”
Yeonjun knew his face was as red as a tomato and that some people in the shop heard him, he saw the barista hide a smile as she mixed a drink. It didn’t matter, because instead of getting angrier, Soobin had a smile of his own, one that he seemed to try to hold back, but couldn’t.
“I’m going to shoot you right fucking now, bitch, why are laughing?”
Soobin laughed some more, took a long sip of his drink and waited until the waitress served Yeonjun’s order to answer, not bothering to whisper anymore.
“I’m pretty sure if anyone would be giving anyone a reach-around, it would be me. Besides, you don’t have your gun on you. Your clothes are way too tight, you couldn’t hide it anywhere.”
Yeonjun wanted to stay angry. To shove it in Soobin’s face that he meant nothing and that he would be more than happy to never see him again. Those were all lies, obviously.
“So, do you come here because of, well, you-know-what, or because your house is nearby?”
Soobin looked surprised at the change of subject, but he went along with it. “A bit of both, actually. I have to walk past here on my way to the precinct, the one I work in now. Why?”
Yeonjun raised an eyebrow, taking an innocent bite of his croissant. It was very dry, so Yeonjun assumed Soobin came more because of his guilt and less because of it being nearby. It took Soobin ten whole seconds to get it, but once he did, his whole face lit up. Yeonjun had almost somehow forgotten those dimples. He guessed that by the end of the night it would permanently mark itself in his memory, like a tattoo.
Once they reached Soobin’s place, many of Yeonjun’s expectations were not met. First, he expected to get jumped as soon as they crossed the door, but instead Soobin took him by the hand, brought Yeonjun to his living room and sat down with him. Then, they kissed. Just lips over lips, as Yeonjun tried again and again to escalate it, but Soobin calmed it all down, saying that they had all the time in the world.
Yeonjun also expected to be brought to some messy tiny apartment, but instead Soobin had a goddamn penthouse. He had no business being a cop while being the heir of the Queen of England or something.
“Could you please stop gawking at my fireplace and pay attention to me, hm? I’m the man who needs to make up for a year without kissing you.”
Yeonjun ignored the dopey look on his former partner’s face and kept gawking at the whole damn apartment, looking at the TV in disbelief.
“It’s so thin, what the hell,” he said, as Soobin tossed his head back on the sofa with a hearty laugh. “Don’t laugh, damn. Why the hell are you a cop when you have all this,” he completed, gesturing towards, well, everything.
“I like feeling like I’m a hero and I couldn’t get past the second day of the fireman academy. Now would you,” he murmured, suddenly pushing his voice a few octaves lower, pulling Yeonjun’s face back towards him with a finger on his chin, “stop paying attention to my furniture and kiss me instead?”
Yeonjun acquiesced, melting into Soobin’s embrace as their lips met once again. Only this time, Soobin kept pulling on his waist until Yeonjun was straddling him.
“Guess I’ll see how many thousands of threads your sheets have, right?”
Soobin finally had that look, that one dark look Yeonjun dreamt about for a year on his face, grabbing Yeonjun’s ass like it was made to fit into his palms.
“You bet you will.”
Yeonjun didn’t really learn it that night. They didn’t make it out of the couch.
A week after they made up, both Yeonjun and Soobin had golden necklaces. The cross pendant was still in Soobin's neck, it obviously gave him some sort of comfort, he used it as his own radio, to talk directly to God.
Yeonjun's didn't have a pendant, but a golden ring. There was no point in Soobin wearing a purity ring, not after fucking Yeonjun all over his penthouse like he wanted to mark it with their scent, like two animals in rut. He cried, most of the nights they met up, Yeonjun had never crossed paths with a person that carried more guilt than Soobin did. Guilt over Alba's death, guilt over Yeonjun's career, guilt over being who he was, for loving who he did.
Yeonjun had never been a religious person, so he struggled to relate and he was haunted by his own ghosts. Any loud noise sent him into a panic and his phone bills were becoming ridiculous as he needed to call Soobin when he wasn't around to calm him, their talks slowing to just shared breathing until one of them fell asleep, which was very romantic until it became unsustainable. Soobin offered to pay for his therapy, but Yeonjun was sure he would get over it. Someday.
For now, he had to deal with it, just like tonight, where Soobin was out on a case at goddamn 4am and Yeonjun couldn't stop thinking, mulling over all the changes in his life and thinking if everything he was doing for this relationship was worth it.
It didn't take them long to realize that they didn't know each other, not really. They only spent six days in those rentals, two of them ignoring one another before having sex and then going cold turkey for a year. They were compatible in a lot of aspects, most of all in their sexual preferences, what made them tick, what put them to sleep at night with a good ache deep down their bones (and in Yeonjun's case, other places too). But they were also vastly different, in small and big things. Yeonjun stopped finding Soobin's wealth amusing and very quickly it made him feel unaccomplished, like he was always ten steps behind his boyfriend. Soobin snored, loudly, every night, and he woke up with a thunderous mood if Yeonjun poked him at night to make him stop. Yeonjun didn't take the greatest care of his health, so he constantly forgot his meals, he couldn't remember the last time he stepped into a clinic and even though he had bad eyesight after a long day reading reports and faxes, he refused to get glasses. He prohibited Soobin from offering to pay for a better insurance plan two weeks into their relationship and he ignored his annoyed looks when he got dizzy every now and then.
So far, resolving it all in bed was going great. They bickered, they argued, refused to meet in the middle for most things, but it all went away when they got in bed. Just before leaving for work, Soobin had edged Yeonjun for almost an hour to punish him for not eating lunch earlier in the day.
Still, sex couldn't fix everything. Yeonjun was about to be twentyseven and this type of relationship was excusable maybe for eighteen, nineteen year olds who didn't know better, but not two grown ups working a very dangerous job. Yeonjun's thoughts kept escalating as he waited for Soobin to come back, feeling increasingly anxious in his thousand-thread pillowcases and bed sheets. By the time Soobin got home, Yeonjun was watching the sun rise in the living room, having grown sick of the bed that felt foreign for him.
"Hey, baby, why are you up so early? Isn't today your day off?"
It was, but Yeonjun was about to explode. Sleep wasn't even an option.
Soobin didn't seem to notice Yeonjun's mood, instead going back to his room to shower and change. Once he was done, Yeonjun was packing the few things he had in this apartment up. He needed time to think, away from this place. And maybe sometime away from Soobin too.
"Uh… what are you doing, Jun?"
Yeonjun shrugged, noncommittal. His plan was simple: kiss Soobin good morning, get his shit and then leave. Then, ignore his calls until he knows what to fucking do. He wouldn't be able to think around Soobin at all. He'd probably be gagging on his dick in less than ten minutes if he stayed.
"I don't know what you think that shrug meant, but to me it looks like you're about to break up with me and that makes no sense. We were fine before I left, what's going on? Is your family okay?"
Fuck. Fucking fuck and goddamnit. Soobin was going to make this very, very difficult.
"Everything's okay. I'm just going back home, so I'm grabbing my shit."
Yeonjun was about to turn around to go to Soobin's suite and grab his toothbrush, but Soobin stopped him dead in his tracks.
"It's okay if you wanna go home, but you don't need to take your slippers with you. It makes it seem like you don't plan to come back."
Well. Maybe Yeonjun didn't.
"What? What the hell, what did I do wrong?"
Yeonjun deflated, dropping his bag with a sigh. He didn't mean to say it out loud.
"Nothing, I think. I don't know. I just need some time to think," Yeonjun muttered as Soobin got closer to him, grabbing his face in his two big, warm hands. Suddenly, his resolve started to die down.
"My point still stands. If you want space, fine, go home, I can sleep by myself today. But fuck, you look like you haven't slept well for days and you're not looking at me," he said, chasing down Yeonjun's gaze as he tried to run away from those dark, earnest eyes. "I know I'm difficult and I know it has been a bumpy ride, but I think we deserve more than you just up and leaving when nothing that we can't fix happened."
That was the thing. There wasn't anything of that scale, a big monster in the midst of a paradise to point at and try to kill. Instead it was a bunch of thorns in a pretty rose, a relationship that flamed strong and hot in bed but seemed to rip at the seams everywhere else. Not to mention that Yeonjun wanted to introduce Soobin to his family, but that was immediately shot down as soon as it was brought up. Yes, it was difficult to be out, the AIDS crisis was still the talk of the town, people would still be cruel and even violent, but Yeonjun's parents were fine with it. They already knew. Soobin was still deathly afraid of it though, not even considering the idea of coming out to his mom. It didn't seem fair. Was Yeonjun really the bad guy for wanting more, for needing a stable, sane relationship, not one that had been marked by murder and uncertainty?
"Look, I know I ask a lot of you. It's a lot for me too and you know it. But I'm willing to try, Jun, it hasn't been even two months. What we have has to be strong enough to last a lot longer than that."
Yeonjun didn't know what to say. Soobin was probably right, but Yeonjun couldn't keep up with this. All this anxiety, all this worry. What good would it do to either of them to insist, to keep going and just fucking their problems away until it all poisoned even their sex life?
"I don't know, it's just…" Yeonjun only noticed that he was crying once Soobin pulled him in, embracing him in tight hold. His chest was so warm, so strong. It already felt like home. "I just feel so much, all the time."
"And that's good, baby," Soobin said, kissing the crown of Yeonjun's head like he could push his seemingly clear thoughts onto his brain. "I love you so much it feels like I'll die sometimes. But then I look at you and it feels right. I want that, I need that. Don't you?"
The L word made Yeonjun flinch, but Soobin seemed to ignore it. Wasn't this way too soon?
Love was a big, very meaningful word.
"Let me show you how I feel, okay? Then you tell me if you want to leave or not. I won't stop you."
Soobin was a big, fat liar. Yeonjun thought they were going to talk, to try to put into words all the turmoil Yeonjun felt inside, but instead, Soobin took him to bed.
The whole point of his confusion was that no matter how bad things got, they ended up here and buried it all in a chest, hidden deep inside their brain. Yeonjun's chest felt like it was way, way too full and soon it was going to explode. He feared that if it did, it would break them beyond repair.
"I know you're worried," Soobin said, once they were both undressed and Yeonjun already had three fingers up his hole. He was still sore from the day before, but somehow the pain was welcome. It felt like it was grounding him and keeping him from lashing out and ending things here and now. "But we'll make it work. We had a whole year apart to flush each other from our systems, but we didn't, right? That was one entire year that we missed. I won't miss another second, not for anything. You either stay with me and we go through this together, or you leave me and we'll forget this whole thing happened. You focus on your job and I take Father Johnson's advice and marry a girl from my church, how about that?"
No. Absolutely not. Soobin didn't belong to any church girl, one that would never accept to take it from behind, the way he liked.
He belonged here, between Yeonjun's legs, sucking a bruise into his pec before biting a rosy nipple until it got red. Church girls only had sex for procreation. Yeonjun was a cock obsessed slut. He was the only one who could give Soobin what he needed.
"You're not going anywhere, for fuck's sake. No church bitch can take this cock," said Yeonjun as he gripped his lover's length tightly, having completely forgotten what he had been thinking about just moments before. Even the idea of leaving was just gone, like it never happened in the first place. "I'm the only one who does it the way you like it."
Soobin looked way too pleased once Yeonjun was finished talking, pulling off his fingers and letting Yeonjun push his throbbing cock inside him, where it belonged.
They'd done it dozens and dozens of times by this point and it was like Yeonjun's inner walls had molded to fit Soobin, to let him come in and just take whatever he wanted. In their haste to leave the earlier conversation behind, they had forgotten a condom, but at this point, was it even necessary? They knew they were clean, they had a whole year of celibacy and about a hundred attempts to just go out and fuck the first schmuck they could find out and about. It never worked out, for either of them. What they wanted was this: Soobin moaning low and guttural right on Yeonjun's ear, fucking him slowly as Yeonjun grew delirious, totally enamored and trapped in this same song and dance.
They would fight, for real things or petty ones, no matter, and then they'd end up right here, as Yeonjun gave himself the liberty to scream - Soobin was capable of getting him there, after all - and Soobin loved him the only way he knew how to.
He didn't lie to Yeonjun when he told him, all those nights ago, that he'd never had a girlfriend. How could he, when girls always seemed so breakable, so soft, so bland and uninteresting?
No, no. This was his true calling. To fuck his boyfriend deep and hard, like he wanted to bury him down the mattress, watching fascinated as his face went through a whole journey: pain, pleasure, bliss and, as much as he didn't want to admit to himself yet, love.
Every night or day that they spent together, the L word got to the tip of Yeonjun's tongue, just about to burst out without his permission.
Tonight, once again, he held it back tightly, instead fucking himself back into Soobin's cock until his suave façade crumbled and he was just about howling, devouring Yeonjun's neck and collarbones while his rhythm faltered, again and again, until he couldn't hold it back any longer. Soobin came first and the alien feel of his cum covering him on the inside brought Yeonjun right with him, they both riding their high until their hips couldn't possibly move anymore.
Next morning, Yeonjun's gun and badge were right beside Soobin's on his kitchen counter and his slippers were back at the doorstep.
Yeonjun wasn't going anywhere, not if Soobin could help it. He did own a pair of cuffs after all.