Chapter Text
Today was a big day for Peter, a new chapter in his life. He knew that his life was going to greatly change, but he had no idea how massive this change was actually going to be. The young man tried his best to relax for now. He did not want his parents to worry more than they already did, so he had to look strong for them. At the same time, he was excited. After all, going to MIT was a huge achievement, he should be very proud of himself. At least his parents were, their reaction had been very clear about that. His mother had been the first to hug him so tightly that Peter thought he was going to choke. Then his father did the same, declaring he had never doubted his son. The two men had been working hard together to prepare the son for all the steps he had to go through to achieve this. This is why it felt so good to hear:
“I am proud of you, kid.”
The young Stark looked at his father. Watching the scenery go from the car window really made him forget to savour the moment. His last ride with his parents.
“So am I! You did such good work, and I am sure you are going to excel at MIT. I might soon have you design our latest invention instead of your old man!” Added his mother.
“Hey! I am right there!” Complained Tony. “And I am not that old thank you very much. I am at the age where all the ladies that like a mature gentleman want me!”
Peter adjusted his seating position, even though he had been lucky enough that his father did not choose one of his sports cars where the young man had to crouch for the entire drive, he still had messed up his back a bit.
“I did not want to hear that Dad! But thank you… I promise I am going to do my best.”
His father chuckled.
“You better, you have the Stark name to uphold! But I am sure you are going to love it there, you will see.”
He could hear some sadness in his father’s voice which made Peter bite his lip. He, too, was sad to leave his parents behind. They had already been there for him, giving him so much love, and that no matter what happened. From the day they took him in, deciding to raise an orphaned child as their own, through all the struggles they had to face when Peter had troubles adjusting to his new life, to now with the start of his independent life. They never stopped loving him for a second. Peter started feeling overwhelmed by the idea of being away from his parents for so long but held himself together. If he cried, so would his mother and father, and let’s just say it was better to avoid that.
Finally, his father pulled into the underground garage of the apartment complex Peter was going to live in. The future MIT student had repeatedly told his parents he did not need an entire apartment for himself, he could live on university accommodation or find flatmates, but that did not change their opinion. Something about how it will be much better for him as he will learn to be independent, and nobody will bother him while he studies. They were good arguments, but they still did not explain why they had to choose a such luxurious apartment. That probably came from the fact they always wanted to give him as much as possible. Peter should consider himself lucky they did not buy him a villa or a house. Not that would have made any difference to his parents’ finances, but it would have made some discussion with new friends possibly quite awkward. That was assuming they had not seen him in any of those rubbish tabloids. One of the perks of having billionaire parents and a father who is an Avengers. Once parked, Peter went to the truck to get his remaining bags. There were only a few of them as most of his belongings had already been sent to the apartment ahead of him. It made moving much easier. However, his father got to them first.
“Ah-ah, let me take care of them. You need to rest, school starts tomorrow, and you will need to be as much rested as possible, trust me. They will have no pity, it does not matter if it is your first day, you will have to show them you are a true genius!” He said picking up the bags.
“Dad, they are not going to make me run a marathon or fight someone, I am here to study, not become a soldier. Even if they did, carrying two bags would not change anything.” Argued Peter.
It was useless as Peter's father had already made a run for it. Typical. Peter closed the trunk and locked the car before following with his mother. She gently took his hand as they walked past a tone of fancy cars. You could clearly see what kind of people lived there. Even if the boy had been living in this world for most of his life, he still felt somewhat uneasy. He never got used to this fancy new world, still stuck with how his aunt had taught him to live. He barely remembered her now, she was just a distant memory, but he was still missing her. That felt unfair to his parents who had given him so much, but he could not help it.
“You seem sad.” Said his mother, making him go back to earth. “Is everything alright? I know this is all scary, but your father and I really do believe in you. You have become such a smart and brave young man, like your father but with my wisdom luckily. I do not have to worry about you doing stupid things just for fun. But anyway, you know we will be a call away and we will get here as soon as possible if you need us.”
Peter nodded quickly, not wanting to make his mother worried, and then could not help but smile. He always liked to hear how he became a mix of his parents. They were truly his role models, admiring them so much. It felt like an honour growing up to be like them.
“I know Mom, I know. I will call you right away if anything happens.” The son replied.
He took his mother in his arms. He was going to miss her hugs so much. She always had a way with hugs, it was like her superpower. No matter what was wrong, it would get better as soon as she hugged you.
“And I will also call you and Dad as often as possible to keep you guys updated.” He added.
His mother hugged him back, clearly needing this hug as well. Hopefully, Peter had inherited as well of his mother’s superpower.
“You better Peter Bruce Stark! And you will come back for Christmas break, no matter if you have homework, a girlfriend or a boyfriend!”
Peter blushed.
“Mom…” He started. “Yes, I promise I will be back for Christmas.”
After a few seconds, Pepper let go of the hug and patted him softly on the shoulder.
“Good, that is what I wanted to hear.”
Her eyes were a bit red as if she was close to crying. This made it a lot harder for the young man to keep it together. Struggling to not become too emotional, he took once again his mother’s hands and went to call the lift. They did not have to wait long and soon enough they were going upward to the son’s brand-new flat. Once they opened the flat’s door opened, Peter could not believe his eyes. His mother had to drag him inside so he would not stay in the hallway looking flabbergasted. The flat looked huge and really fancy. He could see a beautiful kitchen with everything one could dream of and a more than spacious living room with a television screen nearly as big as the one they had at home. There were decorations of all the nerdy and scientific stuff he liked. The white walls were covered with posters of comics and movies. There was a bookshelf full of all the scientific books he could possibly ever need. There were a few figurines here and there. They represented not only his father but also characters from TV shows he loved. There was also a tone of pictures of their family, ranging from when Peter had just arrived in the Stark family to much more recently. It really did feel already like home. Clearly, his parents had spent quite some time making the flat’s decoration match his taste. Not only that, but his father was standing proudly in the middle of the living room with a very familiar robot.
It was ERI, the robot he had built with his dear father when he was just a kid barely starting to learn robotics, and kept upgrading as he learnt more. ERI stood for “Excellent Robot Invention”. The world had known better names for robots, but Peter had been very young when he named it but had wanted to absolutely follow his father’s tradition of using names that are actually abbreviations. It was a rather simple robot when you looked at it, an arm, and some claws. However, ERI had a lot of hidden talents, not only it had an AI, it, or rather she, was also the perfect assistant when building and creating new inventions. She was highly precise, could warm things to very high temperatures, or the opposite, served as a fire extinguisher, as a calculator, a projector, a computer, and much more. However, that was not her most important utility. She was first and foremost her creator's most loyal companion. She had always – or nearly- been there, acting as the friend that the boy’s parent could not play. He always had trouble making friends, so ERI meant the world to him even though she was an AI, not an actual human. But at this point, did it really matter?
Peter looked at his father and mother, dumbfounded not only by the beautiful flat but most importantly by its favourite robot. He could just not believe it, but at the same time, it made so much sense. The secret project his parents have been working on and why his father had taken ERI to “prep her to live without Peter for a while”. The young man simply did not know what to say, so happy and overwhelmed.
“So? Did we do a good job?” Tony asked
Peter nodded vigorously, still speechless. He made his way to ERI. The robot moved her arm towards the human to look at him.
“I am glad to be here Peter.” She said.
The young man smiled.
“I am glad you are here too ERI.” He replied.
He then turned to his parents.
“This is amazing, thank you so much!”
He went to hug them and as always, they hugged him back with all the love they had for him.
“I am happy that you like it, kid.” His father said.
“We really wanted to make you feel at home here. Even if we are going to miss you so much at our actual home.” Added his mother.
“It is really perfect. Thank you so much.” Replied Peter.
The little family hugged for a while but had to let go at some point. All of them still quite tearful, they started unpacking the young man’s belongings, finishing his move to the new flat. It had been quick some work as most of Peter’s belongings had travelled with him. There were all the clothes to neatly put into the dressers, the computers to rebuild making sure that everything worked properly, the man’s collection of assorted geeky things ranging from figurines to books and making sure they had not forgotten to buy any essential things. There was a brand-new kitchen and bathroom to furnish, there were a lot of things to think about that were easily forgotten. The place definitely felt like it was ready for one specific person. Or more like for one specific person and their robot. Peter and Eri. It was a quite strange feeling to see all one’s belongings neatly put where they should be, as you have been living there forever – and you do actually put stuff back in their place- when you have not been there for an entire day yet.nAt least, it apparently made the parents feel better. As they were making sure that everything was where it should be, Peter could see them being less and less worried. It was as if they were realising, they were not going to leave their kid in a mess but a functioning flat. It was also reassuring to the person who was going to live there, to be completely honest. Once the flat was to the Stark family’s standard, they finally sat down on the couch to rest a bit. It was well deserved. Peter’s father looked at them.
“Well, we still have some time before we need to hit the road, and I don’t know if it is the case for you guys too, but I am starving!” He declared.
Peter had not realised how hungry he was until now. Putting everything away had been very tiring as well, but he was so focused on doing that well he had forgotten to be hungry. Pepper nodded.
“Let’s order something and have a nice last family meal before we leave.” She said.
“Ah, as you mentioned a family meal, my love, we now have to order some cheeseburgers. I am sorry, but it is the tradition.” Answered Tony.
Peter chuckled. It was indeed a bit of Stark tradition, and it could be quite comedic. On one hand, we had the famous Tony Stark, going at it with his burger as if he had done something very personal to him, and on the other we had the fabulous Pepper Stark eating hers as if she was a member of royalty eating such a meal for the first time. Then we had Peter, simply trying to eat his burger before it falls into pieces.
“You heard him, Mom, it is burger night!” Said the student as he took his phone out of his pocket. “Everyone is having their usual?”
Both parents nodded, and just like that, the burgers were ordered.
The evening went well. The family enjoyed each other company while eating some delicious burgers. They would normally watch something on the television, but not tonight. They chose to rather talk about everything and anything. It seemed more appropriate for their last meal together. The time for the parents to leave came too fast. There were a lot of hugs and promises again and a few quickly swept tears. Both the parents and the kid wanted to be strong for the one they were leaving. After lengthy goodbyes, Peter found himself alone in the flat. It felt so quiet all of a sudden. No buzzing coming from his dad’s workshop, not a sound of the voice or heels of his mother. It was just him. Well, him and Eri. At least he was not completely alone, once again his most trusted robot was here with him. That felt very comforting.
“Well, I guess it is time for me to go to bed, I have an early start tomorrow.” The Peter finally said.
“That is the wise thing to do, Peter.” Replied Eri.
“Goodnight Eri.”
“Goodnight, Peter. Rest well”
The young man nodded softly and left Eri as he made his way to his bathroom. He would have loved to stay longer with Eri, anything to avoid completely realising that he was indeed on his own. However, he knew he would hate himself tomorrow morning if he did that. Once all ready for bed, that is where he headed too. He slipped under the cover, trying to adjust to that new bed. As Peter went to reach for his phone, which he had put on his nightstand in order to set his alarm, he noticed something. There was a very familiar shape. He grabbed it delicately and smiled softly when he finally realised what that was. At the push of a button, stars appeared on the bedroom’s ceiling. It was just like the one he had at home. His parents really had thought of everything.
After setting his alarm, Peter laid back into his bed admiring the beautiful stars. One of his oldest memories was connected to those very stars. He was so little; he had just arrived in his parents’ life. Everything was so scary to him, and he missed his aunt so badly. There were so many things he could not understand yet, so everything felt unfair to him. All he wanted was to go back to his aunt. That is when his father had set them up for the first time. He laid with the boy telling him about the constellations and how he had gone to space a few years before; he nearly got stuck there even! After that, it had become some sort of tradition until Peter could sleep on his own. He still kept the little device and used it when he needed comfort.
Slowly, he fell asleep, the stars appeasing him once more.
Notes:
This should be the shortest chapter of the fic at 2938 words, while the other chapters currently average at 3972 words.
Chapter 2: It’s the hard-knock life for us
Notes:
Hi, here is the second chapter! I am thinking of posting one chapter per week (so every Sunday) so like that I can get some time to write more before we catch up to where I am currently at.
Also, thank you very much for the kuddos, they are really appreciated!
Chapter Text
Waking up was rough; it was far too early, and the alarm far too piercing. All Peter wanted was to go back to sleep. That happened sometimes, his mother has had to drag him out of bed a couple of times in the past. Unfortunately, today Peter had to be a big boy and get up by himself as his mother would not be here to give him a hand. So that is what he did, or rather, tried to do. As he started to slowly get ready, the student ended up realising that he was about to be very late. In a matter of seconds, he went from a poor snail trying to cross a garden, to looking like he was trying to prove Einstein’s theory of relativity. Barely finishing his breakfast, the student ran out of his flat. Luckily for him, he was living quite close to the campus. Before he even knew it, he was there. And very out of breath. So much so it took him a few seconds to recover from his sprint. A few seconds was all that he had if he did not want to still end up late. Breathing somewhat normally, Peter entered the building and then the classroom. He had to zig-zag in between students chatting as if they already had a tone of friends there. Must be nice. Peter finally took a free seat where nobody was too close to him. It would be way too awkward if he sat next to someone. Even worse if someone tried making conversation with him. Unfortunately for him, Peter still ended up sitting next to someone as a boy his age took the seat next to him.
“I am going to assume that this seat is free.” The stranger said with a joking smile.
The young man radiated confidence. That is what struck Peter first. Not his piercing blue eyes, which made you feel seen in an uneasy way, or his unruly black hair. Not that they were not easy on the eyes, quite the opposite. Oh god, what was Peter even thinking, he should be grumpy about this guy sitting next to him like that, not wondering how he managed to get such perfect messy hair.
“I guess, yeah…” He answered.
He finally stopped staring at the stranger and started to take his things out of his bag, getting ready for the class. He might have to take notes from the second the professor would walk in, and he did not want to miss a single word. His father did say they were not playing here.
“I am Harry. Nice to meet you, what’s your name?”
“Peter.” He mumbled.
He did not dare look in his direction as he said that, wanting to stay focused.
“Cool, do they call you Pete?” Asked Harry.
Peter was not sure who would be “they” but decided not to ask as it sounded like a stupid question.
“No.”
“Ah, that’s a shame. I-“ Started the young man but he did not finish.
Peter had been saved from more awkward conversation as the professor had arrived. However, it meant that the hard work was going to start. Indeed, barely taking the time to arrive at his desk, the older gentleman started to explain what exactly he wanted from his students and how he would not accept anything else. No pity at MIT. The man did look the part he was playing. Everything about him screamed “I will overwork you to death and not lose a second of sleep about it”. He had sharp and silver eyebrows, square glasses he already had to readjust twice in the span of a minute, and perfectly combed grey hair. Definitely not the type of man to enjoy a good laugh. He made that fact known, explaining in detail how he was going to make the students’ life hell. Luckily Peter was determined and had always been hard working. He got that from his parents, who had their own ways of going about that. The young man did not start to worry and kept taking notes.
The class went on so fast, with not a second of rest to catch your breath. The short break before the next class was going to be much appreciated, especially if all professors were like that. They probably were. It did really give the impression the professor was here to do another round of selection: you were actually ready to put in all the work needed. Peter planned to work his butt off. He did not come that far to fail now. Absolutely not. He packed up his belongings, wanting to be able to enjoy some fresh air before his next class. As he exited the classroom, he heard rapid footsteps behind him. As he turned his head, he saw it was Harry. The dude really seemed set on becoming his friend.
“Hey! Wait for me, Pete-boy.” He exclaimed.
Peter hesitated for a second but decided to wait for him, not wanting to be rude.
“It’s Peter.” He replied.
Harry had an amused smile and looked at him for a second as if he was trying to figure out Peter based on his reply. Once again, his eyes felt like he was looking a bit too deep into Peter’s.
“Okay, okay. Sorry, Peter.” He said as he finally stopped staring into the young man’s soul. “Anyway, you have that class with Dr Octavius too, right?”
Peter nodded softly. It looked like the two students were going to have a few classes together as they were probably in the same program.
“Cool. We can walk together then.” Harry smiled.
His smile nearly made Peter blush. Once again it was that confidence, as if he had never been afraid in his life, as if he knew exactly what to say to make people like him. If that was the case, why was he trying so hard to become friends with Peter when he could have been friends with one of those kids with massive friend groups? Oh, that was probably why: because he was a Stark. Peter was not nearly as famous as his parents, trying his best to avoid camera flashes and public attention. Unlike his father, that was really not his thing. He had never liked being the centre of attention unless it was his mother’s or father’s. He hesitated. Should he tell Harry off immediately so he would not waste his time, or should he let him see by himself that he was not going to meet his parents anytime soon? He picked the second option. At least he would not look like a miserable loser, sitting alone, for a bit.
The two boys made their way into the second class and sat together. This time, the professor was less grumpy and looked younger. It did not mean he could not be a sadist too, Peter stayed as alert as he had been in the previous class. Doctor Octavius introduced himself as everyone started to settle down.
“Welcome to my class, I am Dr Octavius. Together we will learn about the joy of robotics and their applications to the world of Physics. All I ask of you is to come here with an open mind, ready to learn and do your best. I want to see you passionate about what you are learning and to do some proper hard work. If you can do that, you should be fine. However, this is not me saying my class will be easy, I want to emphasize the part where I said you will need to work hard.”
Peter liked this professor better. Yes, he expected his students to work very hard, but not because he wanted to torture them, but because that is how you learn about things and become the best version of yourself. He was already liking this class and robotics, it was kind of a family thing.
Once again, the class flew by, but it was much more interesting and entertaining. Doctor Octavius asked a lot of questions and Peter, coming out of his shell, answered as many of them as he could. He also delightfully learnt that there will be a big project at the end of the class: building your own robot as a solution to a problem, preferably related to research done in physics. Peter could do that, especially since it seemed that what was expected was quite basic and simple. It was going to be a blast. Unfortunately, it was a group project, meaning that you had to be in groups of two or three. He did not mind working on robots with a partner … when this partner was his father, or even Bruce Banner, aka Uncle Bruce. Suddenly, Peter felt someone on his left staring at him. Harry. Oh oh.
“We should work together! I know we barely know each other, but I am sure we would make a great team.” He said.
Had Harry planned this? Did he know about Doctor Octavius’s group work? No, Peter was being paranoid and thinking too highly of himself.
“I mean… We have some time to choose our groups, but we can keep that option in mind” Peter replied.
“Cool, that works for me.”
The man smiled and Peter looked away.
“I have to go to my next class” Peter declared.
“Right, right… Well, I have an hour break so clearly, we do not share this class, but I will see you next class we have together, right Peter?”
The brown-haired boy hesitated for a second, not sure if he liked the idea of someone waiting for him like that, but not to hurt Harry’s feelings he nodded his head.
“Sure. See you then.” He replied before leaving, not wanting to be late.
The rest of the day was pretty much what you would have expected: a lot of hard classes and a sea of new information. Peter did not talk to any other people, Harry and his push to be Peter’s friend had been plenty enough. The young man just wanted to get on with his classes. Most of the professors were like the first one, and not like Doctor Octavius unfortunately. It was fine, the boy would manage, he was not too scared. He was, however, tired. Very tired. It had been a rough first day, his father had not lied to him. As he finally made it back to his flat, he let himself fall face-first on his couch. Damn, it was a really comfy couch. He could fall asleep like that and never wake up; he would be happy with that. As he was actually going to close his eyes to get some well-deserved rest, his phone rang. He could not help but let out a groan. Not rest for him apparently. Moving as little as possible, Peter fished his phone out of his pocket and then held up his phone to his face to see who was calling him. His mother. Using a video call. Yep, the boy had to move. He sat up straight on the couch, not wanting his mother to see him all slushed onto the couch and answer the call.
“Hi, Mom!” He started but quickly saw his father was there too, not very surprising. “Hi, Dad!”
“Hi, sweetie!” His mother replied. “How was school today? Did it go well? Did you make friends?”
Right, no time for chitchat, straight to the big questions. That was his mother for you.
“It went fine. Most of the professors seem to not be very… flexible and have very high expectations, but I will be fine. There’s one that is more chill, Doctor Octavius and we are going to have a robotic project, so that’s super cool! I am pretty excited about that.”
“You see kid,” intervened his father. “That is with whom you need to get all buddy-buddy. You need to become his favourite student, answer all his questions, ask him a lot of interesting questions, and offer your help with his project. That’s how you will be able to make connections, and also get away with more stuff.”
Peter nodded slowly.
“I know Dad. His class is really engaging, and he was asking a lot of questions about stuff we worked on together before, so I was able to answer a lot of them. He also talked a bit about his research, it seems really cool. I’ll send you stuff about it later.”
“Yes please, later.” Said Pepper. “You guys know I find it so cute when you talk about science, but I would like it if my son has had any luck making friends!”
His mother was truly no quitter either. The Starks were a family of determined and quite often stubborn people. You can see how it could make family meals quite fun. Especially with extra special guests. Peter hesitated to either lie to Pepper, telling her either he had made a tone of friends or had not talked to anyone yet, or tell her about Harry. He did not like to lie to her, as she raised him better than that and was not easily fooled, so he decided to be truthful.
“Yeah, I guess. I met another student. He is nice and we have a few classes together so technically you can say I had some luck.” He replied.
“Is he cute?” Tony asked right away.
Peter blushed a lot, as he did every time his father tried to get involved in his romantic life. As if he had any. Joan of Arc probably would have had more luck than him, and that was something since… Well, since she never had any relationship officially before dying. Luckily, his mother seemed to give a small bump with her elbow into the man’s arm, trying to protect her son from too much embarrassment.
“You’re the one that started talking about friends! And I am sorry if I am rooting for my son to have his playboy phase and enjoy the true university experience!”
Yep, Peter wanted to disappear. Clearly, simply dying his hair the same colour as someone did not give him the same confidence and personality as them. Who would have guessed?
“Well, anyway, I have some studying to do and then I need to prepare dinner. I am the one in charge of making that now, you know. I will talk to you tomorrow, I promise. Bye!”
As the young man hung up the phone, he could hear his mother berating his father for having made their son so embarrassed. Het let out a sigh of relief, glad to have escaped this awkward situation. However, he had to now study. It was barely better, but he did not have a choice about that. That is why he went to work.
After working hard, eating some okay-ish dinner, and then working again for a few hours, Peter was done. He had not finished all the work he would have ideally done, but he could not take it anymore. Do not get this wrong, he loved what he was here to study, but this could feel so…tedious. It was like spending hours setting up your favourite board game and having days left before you finish doing that and can actually play it. It was exactly how it felt like. It made sense, you need to get all the groundwork done before doing the fun bits, otherwise, you will not be able to fully understand them. However, it did not change the fact that it sucked. At this point in the night, it would be useless for the boy to keep going as no information would stick in his brain, it would be as to try to remove water from a boat that had a big hole. However, he was not ready to go to sleep. Some frustrating things have made him way too much mad for that. Peter could try to relax by taking a bath or watching something, but he was not really in the mood for that. Just the thought of that made him feel even grumpier for some reason.
Getting even more frustrated with himself, he looked out of the window. That had been the right move as he now knew what he wanted to do: go for a walk. Some fresh air was what he needed, and it would be fun to explore the campus a bit. True, it would not make his mother very happy if she knew as it was dark, but he was a big boy. He was here to become his own man, so might as well go on for a walk after dark. He got himself ready, making sure to dress appropriately for the September weather, and left his flat. Once outside, he stood for a few seconds in front of his building. He had expected much more agitation. After all, they were very near the campus with a bunch of college students. They like to party, right? Well according to his father, they did. Maybe they had already gone to a specific flat or went back home. It is not like Peter was an expert on parties. He had not even been to one. That is if you do not count charity galas and pity parties his father tried to throw for him before realising it was, indeed, not his thing.
Standing there felt nice. There was some wind, a bit cold in Peter’s taste, but it was quite invigorating. True that was the opposite of what he was trying to be, but he will take it. The silence was also quite enjoyable. It felt like he was the only one out there, the Earth ready to be slowly fully discovered by him and only him. As it would be rude to make planet Earth wait, Peter started walking. First, he set his cap to the campus, that was what he wanted to explore tonight. Once there, he just started to roam freely, not thinking much about where he was going exactly. He went around some buildings and finally started to see some people. Not that was really the goal, Peter would prefer being alone. They seemed to be a bunch of drunk guys shouting stuff that the boy could not understand. It was as if they had forgotten how to speak properly and had come back to their baby state. Quite weird to listen to that. Peter made sure not to come too close to them, he did not want them to notice him and decide they had a problem with him. Better be safe than sorry, drunk people could do some really stupid things.
As he kept walking, he started to see some university buildings that still had some light in them. That was pretty odd as it was quite late. People were really working hard here, which made sense. They were at MIT, not the most relaxed and chilled-back place to be. A bit curious, the young man went towards them. The first one seemed to have a sign posted at its front. He had to come closer to be able to read it. “Post-Grad Research Centre for Biological Science.”. Well, that explained exactly what that was and why people were working so late. They were probably a bunch of PhD students trying to make their thesis work. There was a second sign as well, much smaller, that was clearly a somehow new addition. “Volunteers needed”. Apparently, their research was based on something linked to human beings, but in a way, they could actually experiment on them without getting into non-ethical territory. Also, the sign was very vague, as most of the time, for this kind of thing, you needed a specific kind of people unless you were looking to test the effect or something on the general public… Well, it was either that or they simply had more information inside. Peter would have helped out by volunteering, but he had way enough work. This first day of the semester had proven it. Maybe during the summer, it would be nice to see how these things work.
As Peter was going to resume his walk, someone behind him spoke.
“Sorry, I did not catch your name during the lecture.”
He jumped a little bit, as he had been lost deeply in his thoughts, and turned around. It was Doctor Octavius. The brown-haired boy was quite surprised he had recognised him, even though he did indeed talk quite a lot during the lecture, answering questions.
“It’s Peter, Doctor.” He replied. “Peter Stark.”
The lecturer smiled slowly, as he was amused at the realisation of who Peter actually was.
“Ah, I see. It now makes sense why you knew so well the topic we were discussing. It is right in your family’s field.”
Peter did not really know how to take that comment. He was quite used to people dismissing him because of his parents, especially when he would show his knowledge. It was never because he had learnt a lot of things, but always because he was Tony Stark’s son. As if his father would have just implemented a chip into his head to make him know everything he knew. It was undeniable that the famous Stark had helped him a lot, as he had been his teacher for more than a decade, that was indeed an advantage. However, that did not mean he did not have to work too. The knowledge did not just come to him. The doctor must have sensed the young man’s mixed emotions, as he said:
“Don’t get me wrong Peter, I did not mean in a way that could have lessened all the hard work you probably have done before getting here. It is just nice to see that the Stark legacy seems to be safe with you.”
That sounded like he knew something about that famous Stark legacy, something more personal than most people. The boy hesitated and then decided to just go ahead.
“You knew my father, doctor?” He asked.
The man nodded slowly.
“I did.” He replied. “We were students here at the same time. I remember him well, who would not? He was the star of the class. Everybody would notice if he would skip a lecture… Which happened more than I hope it will happen for you, Peter. However, nobody could deny he was brilliant.”
Peter smiled softly hearing all of that. Nothing in what he had just been told was surprising, more like very in character for a younger -or even older- version of his father.
“That does really sound like him. I am sorry, I do not remember if he mentioned you before. To be fair, my mother kind of forbade him from talking to me about his college days as she was scared it would influence me to do the same thing.”
Doctor Octavius shook his head slowly, smiling as if he was amused at the idea that Tony would have mentioned him.
“I doubt your father remembers him or ever knew about me. There were quite some of us in that year and I was not really noticeable, more the quiet type.”
“Right, I see.” Replied awkwardly Peter. “You were working this late on material for classes or for your own research?”
Yes, the boy was curious to possibly hear about the man’s research but was as well a bit nervous. It had happened in the past that he bumped into someone who hated his father for some stupid reason or was jealous of him as they thought they were smarter because of it. That was more often than not doubtful seeing their arguments. Of course, they would use the opportunity to have his son right in front of them to rant or verbally lash out. Or they were the fans, which was also very weird as they would beg him to let them meet his father, not caring at all about the son. Of course, the young man had never told Tony about it. It would crush him and make him feel so guilty for being his dad when he was the best father Peter could have ever hoped for. He would not change who he had for his parents for anything in the world. Screw the people who thought they knew more about his father than his own son.
“Research. I am trying to develop a way of combining safety and high precision while doing research. We already have very good robots and the works, but I am looking for something more direct between the person doing the experiment and the action.”
Peter smiled.
“That sounds really interesting, especially as you need a quick response time during some experiments or if something goes wrong. There are some robots that are very easy to control, but you can still that barrier indeed, or AI but that is even trickier as you end up having to basically work through someone else… Sorry, I did not mean to explain to you why your own research is important, I just think it is probably very interesting to work on finding a solution to that and it will completely revolutionise the world of science.”
Doctor Octavius laughed a bit. Peter did not know if it was because he thought what he had just said was completely idiotic or out of place, or if it was for some positive reason. Hopefully, it was the second option otherwise Peter would have to make himself disappear.
“Do not worry Peter, I appreciate the enthusiasm that you are showing. I would love to discuss it further with you someday, or even have you as my assistant if you show me that you are as smart and as hard-working as I hope you are.” The doctor declared. “On that note, I am going to have to wish you a good evening, as I need to rest before tomorrow’s classes, and I strongly suggest you do the same. You will need to remain focused tomorrow.”
Peter nodded. The man was right, it was really late. He should probably go back to his flat and finally go to sleep.
“I am going to do that. Good evening to you too, Doctor.”
The lecturer left and the student walked back to his flat. Finally ready to sleep, he got ready to do so. He was glad he had this chat with the Doctor. He seemed like a very smart and nice man. Now, Peter was even more determined to do well in order to show him he was indeed worthy to assist him in his research. How cool that would be. That would probably be the best summer ever. With a head full of hopes and dreams, Peter fell asleep, excited to see what the future would hold for him.
Chapter 3: What a night
Chapter Text
The following days went on quite quickly. Classes were hard, Harry wanted to hang out, and Peter wanted to impress Doctor Octavius. The two boys mostly talked in between their classes, not having seen each other yet outside of an academic setting. It was not like Harry had not tried to plan a hangout. He had tried multiple times in fact. However, Peter always felt too behind in his work, when he was actually ahead, or feeling guilty at the idea of having fun instead of studying. He also simply did not have the energy or the motivation to interact for that long with another human being, finding their small talks more than enough. That was, however, before Harry had found his weak spot. Indeed, the man was cunning. While waiting for a class to start, Peter had once mentioned one of his favourite tv shows, a sci-fi show about time travel, and his classmate did not let this opportunity pass him by. A couple of days later, he casually mentioned he wanted to start that specific show but was not sure where to start. Of course, Peter had not been able to stop himself from starting to ramble about it and, without even taking the time to think or even to realise it, offered to watch it with him to help him. Harry had accepted straight away before Peter could even realise that he had fallen right into his trap… but oh well. Now he wanted to watch it while being able to comment on every single little thing to someone who had never seen it. The deal had been made, the students were going to watch it at Harry’s place after their afternoon classes and before it was time for the host to run to his job.
As planned, they left the classroom together. It was already getting a bit dark outside, but nothing to worry about too much. It would become worse as the winter will arrive, so it was not worth it to already feel sad about it. Peter was wearing a jacket. He had never been good at dealing with cold weather, hence why he had always preferred their villa in Malibu to his father’s tower in New York during the winter. He could not deal with the snow; he would freeze before making it outside. Harry, however, was only wearing a jumper, still quite thick, but nowhere near enough for Peter’s taste.
“How aren’t you cold?! Were you living in Antarctica before coming here?” Peter asked.
His fellow student laughed quite a bit.
“No, but I was living in New York before coming here, so chilly weather does not scare me, unlike you.” he replied.
He offered Peter a smile that was half taunting and half charming. Well, even the taunting side had its charm… but the charming half was also annoying.
“I have lived in New York too, you know.” Peter argued. “It just made me like California even more.”
Harry slightly raised an eyebrow, looking rather amused.
“Ah. A Californian boy, how cute.”
This boy, what a smart-arse. As if Peter was not one as well.
“Oh, shut it.” He mumbled.
The proper New Yorker laughed, meaning he had spoken too loudly. Luckily, they arrived at their destination before either of them had the time to find any other sassy retort. Harry was living in one of those fancy flat complexes, as was Peter. That was not surprising considering his clothes. They looked expensive, with high-end shirts and shiny shoes. The man seemed to be always well dressed, as if he took pride in it, unlike Peter who favoured short-sleeved shirts, geeky tee-shirts, hoodies, jeans, and either converse or vans. Not much point in dressing as if you were going to a charity gala when you are just going to class. They entered the lift and Peter let Harry take care of choosing the floor, as he had no idea which one they were going to. The way up was quick but made in silence. It was a bit awkward as they did not know each other that much. Well, now that he was thinking about it, Peter was really hoping this was not a trick to kill or kidnap him. True, at least someone could tell the authorities that they had been seen hanging out together in class, but did anyone even know their name? It is not like Peter would have the physical advantage either. Even if the two men had more or less the same height, Harry being slightly taller, one of them seemed to go somewhat regularly to the gym, and it was not the one being afraid right now. True, it was not to the point where the guy was ripped and could easily beat someone up, but probably enough to have that extra strength that would give him the upper hand.
The lift doors opened, and they ended up quickly in a very spacious flat. It was also very fancy, and it was clear that an interior home designer had overseen the decoration. The walls were white, and all the furniture was either white, black, or grey. Nothing looked out of place, but there were still some visible personal belongings and some pictures framed, meaning that Harry had not simply taken him to a brand new flat. He simply seemed to be a very tidy person. That seemed to somehow clash with his personality. The man seemed so wild and free, but at the same time dressed as an older CEO with the flat of someone obsessed with cleaning. Maybe he just had a cleaning lady that came often or just came before tonight to make the flat look more presentable. Either way, it made Peter nearly too scared to step in it, not wanting to disturb anything, but he still managed to do so.
“Make yourself comfortable.” Harry said as he hung up his coat. “I am just going to get us some refreshments. While I do that, can you set up the TV if you don’t mind? Anything you would like to drink in particular?”
Quite the host he was. Peter softly shook his head.
“Just some water will be fine. Thank you.”
Harry seemed a bit surprised but still went to the kitchen to follow on with his plan. As what had been asked of him, Peter took care of the TV. He did not have much trouble figuring it out, being similar to any high-end television, and soon enough the first episode of the show was ready to be played. However, the host was not back yet, leaving Peter free to observe his new surroundings. Being curious, that is of course what he did. There was not much to look at as the flat looked like one of those you would see in ads. The only interesting things to look at were some pictures that were nearly hidden. They were not hidden enough to be able to state that had been the intention one had when placing them on that high shelf towards the back of the room, but they were not as noticeable as one would expect. Indeed, those kinds of pictures, family pictures, would normally be proudly displayed in such a manner that the one living in the home would see it often and so would their guest. That was definitely not the case here.
The pictures were mostly of Harry and another older man. Probably his father. Seeing that the host was still not coming back yet, Peter decided to take a closer look at the pictures. He recognised the man, it was Norman Osborn, CEO of Oscorp. Oscorp was big, not as big as Stark Industry, but still out there. They were also more into research in the fields of chemistry and biology, which was not at all what Stark Industry was into, which meant they were no way competitors. Complete different fields. Still, Norman Osborn was quite the businessman, which made him some sort of celebrity as well. That clearly meant that Harry was not trying so hard to become Peter’s friend just to hunt fame. That was somehow reassuring. There were still some possible not nice reasons out there, but at least Peter did not have to worry about this one. However, it was a pity that Harry seemed to have a complicated relationship with his father, as the placement of the picture would suggest. There was nothing for him to do about it, however. It was not his business and there were maybe good reasons for their relationship to be the way that it was.
In any case, it was not the moment to ponder on Harry’s business, as it seemed like he was on his way back to the living room, judging by the footsteps. Peter stepped back from the shelf and offered a small smile to his host. He was carrying a board with quite some fancy snacks. It looked more like snacks from a date or what really fancy people would have before dinner with guests. Harry was indeed a fancy dude, so it was not anything too alarming. There were some sweet foods, such as cookies and biscuits, but most importantly there was some charcuterie. Peter was crazy for some charcuterie; he could never resist that. Way too excited to start snacking, he went to sit down on the couch as Harry put down the board on the coffee table. He then went back to get some water for his guest and some unknown drink for him. It was probably something really fancy that Peter’s father would enjoy, explaining why he had no idea what that was.
“Those are some pretty fancy snacks.” Peter remarked as Harry sat down as well.
“I do like to snack well while watching television, and I even more enjoy treating my guests well. It feels like I would get hit by lighting or something if I didn’t.”
The man laughed at what he had just said and then waited for Peter to start the show, which he did.
Before they knew it, it was time for Harry to go. The two boys would have kept watching, but it would be very irresponsible to be late or skip work, so they stopped. The host got ready quite quickly and Peter decided to walk him to his workplace. He had to insist and explain he would probably still take a walk before going back to studying, as he did nearly every night. Finally, his classmate had accepted. They walked outside, taking the time to stroll as they had enough time to get to their destination without rushing. It was of course already dark outside, but that was how Peter liked it. It felt much more peaceful that way. They did not talk much at first, simply enjoying their walk, but as they got closer to the destination, Peter began to wonder.
“So, you work on campus?” He asked, breaking the silence.
Harry nodded.
“Yes, I am just helping out with some research stuff. They do not normally take first years as assistants and even fewer people in our field, but I…” He hesitated for a second as if he was trying to figure out how to formulate what would come next. “Have some past experience that interests them. They actually reached out to me, and I thought, why not? If I can somehow give a hand and start to build connections, sure.”
Peter was now even more curious. Harry must have been assisting in research linked to what his father’s company was working on. He could not try to guess what, as he did not know any of Oscorp’s recent inventions or breakthroughs as it was not really his area of interest. Of course, he knew the major ones, but they were all a bit too old to be relevant here. In any case, it was still a bit weird to ask Harry to assist them. It was straight out assuming that he did participate in any of the research, which was quite far-fetch… unless if it was one of those things that was known only inside of an industry. Maybe it was a known fact he was involved in some of the experiments and research that the centre was interested in. His unique perspective would then indeed be valuable.
“Ah. I see. Is it interesting at least?”
Harry chuckled a bit. Somehow, his laugh was quite sweet. That was weird.
“I mean…” He looked at Peter. “It is probably very interesting to people that actually enjoy biology. Unfortunately, I am not one of those people.”
“Right. That sucks then.”
Peter gave him a sympathetic look. Harry held a bit the eye contact and then looked ahead again. He seemed amused and melancholic at the same time. Peter was still bad at reading emotions it seemed. He wished he had inherited his mother’s ability to read people, but he had not been lucky enough. They both became silent again, but somehow, it felt more awkward for some unknown reason. After a few more minutes, Harry stopped. Peter did the same.
“That’s me.” He declared.
Peter looked where they had stopped. Funnily, or strangely, enough, it was that building he had seen on his first walk, after his very first day of class. Right, he should have connected the dots after Harry had mentioned biology. He could be a bit slow sometimes.
“Yeah. I… guess I will see you tomorrow then.”
That felt weird, but not as weird as when he made plans with him to see a TV show together, so no need to fret about it. Harry nodded and as he started walking toward the entrance, he sprung around, still walking but now backward, with some idiotic smile on his face.
“Yes. Don’t miss me too much in the meantime, Pete-boy.”
He only took the time to wink before hurrying to disappear inside, leaving Peter no time to answer. He raised an eyebrow. What a weird guy. He sighed, even if he was not sure why. Was he relieved to be alone? Was he annoyed by the nickname Harry had once again used for him? He was not sure, but that did not really matter. He was not going to stand there and ponder what his sight had meant, he needed to go back to his flat and study. On that thought, he turned back and started walking, but with every step he took, he realised how badly he did not want to do that. He just wanted to hang out outside, in the dark. It felt so freeing. He wanted to go on an adventure. He had a choice to make. Be smart and go home to study, or for once in his life just go with the flow and do as he pleased.
Peter decided to go with the second option. He could always study later. He walked in between buildings, not thinking much about where he was going, imagining a brand-new life for himself. He was not Peter Stark, that reserved boy that everybody judges before they even know him, anymore. He was a brand-new person, a genius, a superhero, a king, whatever he could want to be. Here he was, discovering his kingdom like a kid making a palace out of a playground. To be honest, the buildings were quite inspiring, with their old architectural style. It was not that hard to pretend to be in a completely different universe. It was as if they had been designed for that, waiting for you to start dreaming and discovering them.
However, it started to rain. That meant the end of the adventure as Peter did not want to get sick by staying in the rain. He rushed on his way back, as he had nothing to protect himself against the rain. There had been not a single cloud during the day despite the fall/winter weather. He did his best to follow the buildings, using them as cover. He had gotten towards where he had left Harry some time ago when he heard something that made him stop. At first, he thought he had imagined it. There was nobody around. As he was about to keep going, getting drenched, Peter heard it again.
“Help!”
He had not dreamt it. Someone was calling for help. Without even taking time to think, Peter rushed towards the voice.
“Please! Someone! Help me! Anyone!”
That sounded like a young woman who was deeply terrified. Running faster than he ever had before, nearly falling headfirst because of the slippery ground, he finally got to the sound of the voice. He made eye contact with some girl who looked barely older than him. He could see all the fear she had in her eyes. She opened he mouth as to ask once again for help, but she fell to the floor. A man right behind her had hit her on the top of her head with something Peter could not identify from this far. Peter never had been as brave as his father. The world made him anxious; he would rather stay in the shadows. He had a lot of opinions and ideals, but never the confidence to actually stand up for them. He rather made himself forgotten, liking to stay in his bubble. His father had tried to make him enjoy the word more, to put himself out there, to be bold, but Peter clearly explained it was just not who he was. He was not a superhero like his father, he was the dude behind the screen, being smart while being completely out of danger. Peter had been okay with that, it was just who he was, no point in trying to change it, but in this instant, it was as if every time he had wanted to speak out, to do something crazy, to let go of his fear and anxiety, to actually be the hero that he admired in his father, all of this just took ever.
As the man was about to hit the already injured woman again, Peter stepped between them. He knew he would not be able to fight him off. He had no strength, no combat training, and the guy was clearly not playing, but it was the thing that felt right. To do whatever he could to let that stranger escape. The pain was intense as the fist went right to his face. Peter could not help but let out a scream. He tried to stay on his feet, but he could feel himself falling. As he was about to let gravity take him, another punch came, changing the direction his body was falling. Once again, he felt an intense pain. He did not have time to try to catch himself as he hit the floor at full force, his entire body smashing into the wet and hard ground. He went to try to get up, pushing on his arms, but a sharp pain in the right side of his ribs appeared, making him crash against the ground, hitting his nose that was already hurting so much. He felt pain over and over again, as if he was going to get suffocated by it. He tried to crawl in the rain, but he was already struggling to lift his head enough to breathe.
Suddenly, the pain stopped. What was happening now? Was he going to get killed in a more efficient way? Did the attacker get sick of hurting him? Then out of nowhere, he got pushed and rolled over on his back. Peter let out a small scream as his body was hurting so much. As he tried to focus his eyes, everything being blurry, he saw some hunched figure standing over him.
“Peter?! What happened to you?!”
This voice… Peter knew this voice. His vision became a bit clearer and was able to finally see a face. It was Doctor Octavius. What was he doing here?
“I…” Was all that Peter managed to say.
“Let me help you get back on your feet, I am taking you to the hospital right away.”
He felt lifted by a struggling force and did his best to help. Before he knew it, he was crashing against his professor, struggling to find his centre of gravity as everything was spinning and hurting.
“’m sorry…”
“It is fine Peter, lean on me. My car is not far.”
The doctor started walking slowly and the student did his best to follow him, but it was so hard and painful. The way to the car felt like it took forever or that he was stuck in a time loop, damned to experience this painful walk forever. Luckily, they did end up arriving to the car. Doctor Octavius helped him to the passenger side.
“Rest against the car while I open the door. Be careful to not fall.”
Peter did his best, letting all his weight against the car and grabbing on the best he could. Then he got into the car. It was as he sat in the passenger seat, that he realised he was completely drenched and freezing. He let the man buckle his seat belt. While looking at his body he realised there was some reddish water on him. That explained that weird taste in his mouth. After his saviour got into the car as well, he did his best to say:
“I am going to put blood in your car…”
The man still turned on the car.
“As if I cared more about some car seat than the wellbeing of my students.”
On that note, they left for the nearest hospital.
The drive there was short. It was very late at night, so there was no traffic, only a few odd cars. Once they arrived, Doctor Octavius helped Peter out of the car and to the reception, where he was taken care of. He was still out of it, due to not only his injuries but also the shock. He had never done anything like that. He had never taken part in a fight; he had never even been punched before. He let the medical staff take care of him, staying in this confused state. He had no idea how long it took, but finally, he ended up in a hospital bed. Peter apparently needed to stay at least the night. Something about possible head trauma. He did not really listen. As he was feeling very confused and tired, probably the painkiller and the lack of adrenaline, someone walked through the door. For a second, Peter was scared it was his parent and he was going to have his butt handed to him, especially by his mother. She would be very disappointed in him for doing something so careless… but she might be secretly proud that her little boy helped someone. His father him, would probably start giving him ways to defend himself and take down more bad guys. But no, it was the professor again.
“Hi Peter, how are you feeling now?”
He seemed very concerned…and gentle. As he sat down next to his student’s bed, Peter’s confused mind could not help to a very old memory of his aunt sitting next to his bed. She had that same worried smile. Peter did his best to snap out of it, the painkiller making him go crazy already.
“Tired…Confused… but more tired.” The young man replied.
Doctor Octavius slightly nodded, as if he was telling himself that it made sense. He hesitated for a second then spoke once more.
“You should rest indeed. But before you do so…”
He stopped in his sentence. It looked like he was trying to find the right words to say. Peter struggled to stay awake long enough to hear him finish his sentence.
“What happened tonight, Peter? If I had not heard some commotion, you might have ended up killed. You need to tell me how you found yourself in that position.”
Right, Peter needed to explain himself. It was normally something he enjoyed, explaining how a thought had come to him or how he fixed a problem, but not tonight. He tried to sit up more straight to not fall asleep right away, but that hurt. He did his best to piece everything together in his mind and to find the right words, but that was not an easy task right now, so he just mumbled something like this:
“I… was just taking a walk… and then I heard some girl yelling for help. She got hit on the head by some guy… and I guess I just tried to step in.”
The professor seemed conflicted as he observed Peter for quite some time before looking at him with worry in his eyes and speaking again:
“You did a very good thing helping that woman, Peter, that was brave of you. It really was. But you need to look out for yourself. You are not a superhero; you are not someone whose job it is to do that and who has been trained for it. You are just a regular student. A very smart one from what I can see in class, so please, be like that outside of class as well. Be smart. If you see trouble, call the police or campus security. You are here to study, not put yourself in harm’s way. Do you understand?”
Peter bit his lip. He was not used to being in trouble. True, it was nothing official, far from it, just one of his professors was telling him not to play superhero. He would never have been able to imagine that would happen one day.
“Yes, doctor. I am sorry.”
The man smiled softly at his response.
“Now rest, you have deserved it.”
He stood up and walked slowly to the doorway. However, before exiting he turned to Peter.
“I expect you to contact the authorities to tell them what happened so they can do their job.”
The doctor gave him a stern look too, as to make it clear he was being very serious, then left. Not even a second later, Peter fell asleep.
Notes:
Can you tell I have a soft spot for Dr. Octavius? I had to have some sort of sweet moment with him.
I also could not but help myself but to recreate that "wink moment" from spider-man 3 with Harry, even though the context/reasons behind it are obviously very different here.
Chapter 4: You can call me Sherlock Holmes
Notes:
Hi, so a couple of things: first I might be away next week-end. If it is the case, I will not able to post on Sunday, but I will make sure to post as soon as I can on Monday (I apologise about the possible delay).
Second, after looking more into why people use tags and thinking about it, I decided to add some so you guys can make an informed decision about reading/continuing on reading this work. I realised that it might look like the fic will be somewhat light, free of dark/sad events, but that is not the case. I expect/plan on things to take a turn later on (about what I am hopping will be the mid-way point).
I am still going to use the "choose not to use archive warnings" because there are some things I am still a bit uncertain about (I have the whole story planned out, I am just not sure how some things will be written), but hopefully the tags I have added will still let you make an informed decision. I do apologise if you have started this fic before they were added and you would have not done so if I had put them right away. It is not the final list either, as like I said there are some aspects I am not 100% sure about, so I might add some other as I go.
I do not expect this fic to be overly graphic (as that is not the kind of things I like to write), but please do feel free to contact me if there are some topics you want to avoid and not sure if they will be mentioned in the fic, I will be happy to help you figure out if you are okay with reading this fic or not.
Chapter Text
Peter was not going to lie, being brave sucked. He had learnt that at least. His body was still hurting, especially his nose and ribcages, as they were the ones that suffered the most damage. He still had a lot of bruises and his nose still looked quite bad. Even breathing was still a bit difficult with all of that. However, that had not been the worst. Oh no. Firstly, it had been quite tricky to hide a beaten-up face from Peter’s parents. He had somehow managed it, only showing the top half and then using so neat filters he had quickly developed once the swelling had gone down a bit more. Of course, Eri, his robot, had judged him quite a lot for it. Luckily, as it was in her programming, she had stayed loyal to him and had not snitched to his parent. All hell would have broken loose otherwise. Iron Man would have been seen flying across the entire country just to come to yell directly at him about hiding his injuries like this. Not exactly how you would want to spend your weekend.
Then, there was Harry. He had… quite an interesting reaction to say the least. Indeed, Peter had thought that he was going to make fun of him, and tease him, but no. He got worried, asking him multiple times what happened. That made Peter uncomfortable. Why was he so insistent, acting as if they were close when they barely knew each other? Maybe he felt responsible, thinking that his classmate had gotten beaten up after walking him to work. Wanting to avoid him thinking that, Peter told him exactly what had happened. It did not do much to make him stop worrying as Harry still kept on going on about what happened and how Peter should go to the authorities. Having enough of this, he finally asked him to just drop it, which the student did. At least that was that.
Peter tried to forget what happened, wanting to focus on his studies as Doctor Octavius had advised him to do so, but he could not do that. He had so many questions. Who was that woman? Who was that guy? Why did he attack her so violently? If it was just some kind of robbery gone wrong, it was weird to do that in the middle of the campus. True, it had been during the night, but obviously, as proven by Octavius and Harry, people were still there working, and Peter must not be the only one wandering at night. He tried to recall whether the woman had a bag or something, but he could not. In any case, it did not make sense anyway for her to not just give him the bag when she was looking so scared. Unless there was something really important in it or something… But still, all of this was fishy. Peter might not be the most adventurous person in the world, clearly, but when something piqued his interest, he had trouble letting it go. It could be either great when it helped him learn more useful or interesting things or even when studying, or it could be very bad when it was not so productive and became nearly an obsession. He probably got that from his father.
Now, he had to investigate. The obvious first thing to do was to come back where all of this had happened and look for clues. As he approached where it all went down, Peter felt nervous, as if he was scared to get beaten up again. He even stopped for a moment, debating if this was even worth it. Did he really want to get involved in all of this? Was getting hurt once not enough? Apparently not as curiosity triumphed over fear. So, there he was, standing when he got punched in the face. Peter could nearly feel again the punch. Or that was just his still-healing nose not liking the strong wind. He looked around him for a bit, not sure of what to look for, then he turned towards where he had seen the girl come from. Maybe he should go that way? Hopefully, there will be more for him to see than where he was standing at. There were just a couple of buildings around, but none she could have gotten out of based on where she had run from. Nothing on the ground screaming “pick me, I am a clue”, which made sense. Even if they had been things like that, which was unlikely, it must have been gone by now.
Not really having any other idea, Peter started walking a bit. Quickly, he ended up at some sort of dead-end caused by two buildings merging. Well, unless she had turned somewhere, which would probably not be the instinct of someone running for their life as they were tight turns, she must had come from one of those two buildings. The one on the left just had some classrooms, used for lectures and tutorials. Nothing really interesting. Peter did not know if the building would have been opened so late. He would assume that no; it would have been probably locked to avoid people going in to mess up things, but then maybe she had a key or something. Weird but possible. Peter quickly forgot about this theory when he realised what was on his right. This… was a weird coincidence. Or it was him overthinking it. There was some sort of back entrance for the research centre conducting some kind of biology experiments. It was the same building that had him wondering about what research was going on inside on his very first walk, and where Harry worked at. Well, that was weird. Right away Peter wanted to start making up crazy theories. His gut never liked that place and now it seemed even more suspicious. However, why on earth would post-graduate students or their professors would want to hurt some random girl? It is not like they had a lot of industrial secrets to protect. That was just… crazy to think they could have something to do with what happened.
Peter shook his head. He must have hit it pretty hard that night. He left, not wanting to look weird, just standing there. Peter went home to study. After cooking himself a delicious grilled sandwich and eating it, enjoying every bite of it, he sat in front of his desk. He got his notebooks, and his books and turned on his computer. Okay, time to study now. He went on to read the first sentence, but instead, a thought came to him. “What if they were actually doing shady stuff in there?”. Oh dear, not again. Peter moved a bit on his chair, as if it would help to shake off this thought, and then came back to his textbook. Once again, he could not focus on the sentence, instead, it was “Maybe they are doing secret experiments, hiding behind the ones of their PhD students?”. Peter groaned. He wanted to study, not create a conspiracy theory about his own university. So, desperately, the boy went for a third time to read the sentence. This time, he did not get interrupted by a thought. No, instead he stood up. If his brain would not leave him alone about his gut feeling, he would show it that there is nothing actually happening. Yes, that was a good plan.
The student quickly dressed up in dark clothes, put his coat and shoes on, and left his flat. Being in the dark again, the first time after his aggression, felt scary, as if he could get attacked at any moment. However, Peter was grumpy and determined to prove himself wrong. He was going to see that there was nothing wrong and he could go back to his bloody studying, so not time to waste to be afraid of the dark. He walked at quite a fast pace to the campus. Once there, he thought for a second. He needed to get somewhere where he could easily see the back entrance without being seen. That was no easy task. There was the library, but that was way too far to actually see anything in the dark. There was then that building with classrooms right in front of it. It was probably locked, but Peter had learnt a few neat tricks with locks. Did he really want to break into a building just to prove himself wrong though? Yeah no, he should be smarter than that.
As he approached, he felt himself running out of options. Looking desperately around, he noticed a tree. Come on. He was not going to climb up a tree. He was going to barely see anything since it was quite far and still had quite some leaves. True they would hide him but also block his view, and in any case, he was still injured and sucked at climbing trees. All of this was stupid. He was being stupid. He did not need to prove anything to himself, he knew he was right. Well, if he was right, then what was the harm of just chilling in a tree if that would then make him able to study? Fresh air was good and since he was so right that nothing would happen, he could just chill out in the tree. Peter groaned. He was really an idiot. He started climbing the bloody tree. It hurt quite a lot, but he powered through, struggling to lift himself up. After nearly falling multiple times. He managed. He went on a strong branch that would let him see the entrance and hugged it for dear life. He really did not want to fall down a tree.
Some time passed, and Peter got bored. Really bored. And cold. And tired. And even more cranky. The list of complaints could go on and on. He had started cussing himself and his dumb idea. As he was about to be satisfied by the proof, as he had found that nothing weird was happening, the back door swung open. What seemed to be two people, one with a big silhouette and the other one more regular, started walking in his direction. Peter did his best to hide well in leaves. Even if it was completely dark now, the university’s lighting could still make him somehow visible. As they came closer, the boy held his breath, afraid of being too loud. It was two men. The bigger guy could have definitely been the one that had beaten him up, but strangely he did not really have a chance to look at his face properly when every happened. As they passed by the tree, he was able to hear some of their conversation.
“… need to fix this before words get out. This is too important. I don’t want…”
Well, that was very weird and suspicious. As Peter started to try to think of possible theories of what the man could have been talking about, he finally realised he could breathe now as they were further away. He did so, gasping for air as the idiot he could sometimes be. He waited a bit in his tree, not because he wanted to see more, but because he wanted to be 100% certain they were far away enough for him to not get caught. It would be very bad. After some time, Peter finally felt comfortable enough to come down. That was the tricky part as he had no idea of how one was supposed to climb back down a tree. For some reason, the climbing up was shown a lot more often on TV than how to climb down without jumping directly. Still, he could not stay up on this tree forever. As he started to make his way backways on the branch, he felt himself slipping. Oh oh. Before he knew it, his feet were dangling in the air. He tried to stop himself, holding on to the branch, but he let go by reflex when he felt his ribcage hurting. He fell once again to the ground, but that time more violently. He let out a very painful grunt.
“Fuck.”
He laid in the patch of grass he had landed on. He had gotten lucky; he had picked a branch that was not too high and did not fall on concrete. Still, it hurt like hell, especially with his previous injuries. He did not move for one or two minutes, trying to breathe through the pain. His body must be hating him right now. Finally, he stood back up. That did not feel good either. He slowly walked back to his flat, fighting through the pain the entire way back.
Peter had gotten lucky that he had not seen anyone while going back to his flat, as he was walking quite funnily. Getting beaten up and then falling off a tree would do that to you for some reason. How strange. When he finally got home, he tried to slowly sit on his couch but that hurt quite a lot. He tried sitting down quicker, but he regretted it when he landed, letting out a small noise of pain. Of course, a busing sound made itself heard as Eri went to see what was up. The busing sound was a conscious choice. At some point, Peter had managed to make her completely silent when moving around. However, after a few dozen heart attacks, he decided to put back some sort of sound so he would be warned when she was coming. His heart’s health got much better after that.
“What happened, Peter?” The robot asked.
He was about to get lectured by his own robot, quite ironic. Maybe his parent had sneaked some code into her behind his back.
“It’s nothing Eri, I fell while on my walk, and since I am still healing it hurts.” The boy tried to explain.
There was no face on Peter’s companion, but he did not need one to feel her scepticism. He had made her too smart to fall for that, pun non-intended, a mistake on his part.
“Are you sure that is all that happened?” Eri asked as she moved her electronic arm a bit closer to her creator, as if she was trying to put some pressure on him.
“Yes, don’t worry about it, okay?”
Peter did not really like to lie, he preferred… to carefully choose his words. You let the other people think you are saying something when you are not actually saying that. True, some could define that as lying, as did his mother, but sometimes it was necessary. It was still better than directly lying anyway. He sighed as he thought of all the work he still needed to do, no matter the fact he just wanted to crash into his bed. He stood up slowly and starting walking to his desk when he stopped for a second.
“Hey, Eri? Could you pull everything you can find on research and experiments conducted by MIT about anything related to biology, please?”
“I suppose this has nothing to do with everything that happened to you?” The machine replied. She was getting really good at giving attitude.
“I am just curious, and learning more about what your university is doing never hurts, right?”
On that note, Peter went to study, planning on looking at what Eri had found later.
Peter was deeply asleep when something nudged him on the shoulder. It was so light that he ignored it. Then again. And again. Okay, it was starting to be annoying. What was that sound as well, that bipping sound? He opened slowly one eye and then realised. It was his alarm. He jumped from his chair, nearly crashing into Eri who had been the one gently tapping him to wake him up. He had slept through his alarm, he was going to be late for class! Oh, that was not good. What made it even worse was that he had class with Doctor Octavius, who would definitely notice his absence. It seemed like participating so much in class and trying to impress your professor had its downsides.
“You need to leave right now if you want to make it on time.” Declared the robot.
Yeah, Peter had gathered that. He threw everything into his backpack and bolted for the door. Luckily, he had fallen asleep before changing into his pajamas. It was far from ideal as he needed a good hot shower and a fresh set of clothes, but no time for that. Same for breakfast. Once out of the building, looking probably very bad, the boy tried to start running. His body clearly said that was not going to happen, between the injuries, the fall he had last night, the lack of sleep, and the lack of food, he would pass out before making it to the campus. Instead, he power-walked, really putting the “power” in it. After what felt like forever, he made it to his class. As the professor was setting up, Peter let himself go on the seat that Harry had reserved him. They would always sit together in classes they both had.
“You look like shit.” Harry said.
Peter looked at him, sort of offended even if he was probably right.
“Geez, thanks.” He replied. “I overslept so I had to rush.”
Harry seemed conflicted but then reached for something in his bag.
“I have something for you.” He said.
That was unexpected but okay. Peter took the opportunity to also grab what he would need from his bag. His classmate had set next to him some kind of thermos flask. That was even weirder. He looked at its owner, puzzled.
“I know you did not like me asking questions about what happened to you, but I still thought I’d give you that. It is the soup my mother would make me when I was ill. I hoped it could bring you some comfort too.” Harry explained.
Peter was very tired, hurting, and now irritated. He had learnt to not trust gifts from people he barely knew or too friendly people, and this boy kept on acting like they were best friends or something. Why was he being like that? Why was he being so nice to Peter? What was truly his motive? It was so annoying to have him trying so hard, so Peter decided to just ask him.
“Why are you being so nice to me? You are acting like we are childhood best friends; we barely know each other!” He asked in a tone that was probably harsher than intended.
Peter regretted it as soon as it left his mouth. That was so mean, Harry was probably just trying to make a friend and being nice. The lack of sleep had really messed him up. Harry looked deeply hurt for a second, looking down and backing away. Peter had barely time to register it before Harry’s face changed to a blank expression. Peter should have really kept his mouth closed.
“Yeah. Sorry.” Harry said in a tone that was eerily neutral as he was reaching for the thermos.
Peter needed to make it up to him. Clearly, he had misjudged him. He went to stop him, but ended up putting his hands over Harry’s as he had already grabbed the thermos. Blushing just a bit, Peter quickly removed his hand.
“No, I am sorry. I… I shouldn’t have said that. I am really grateful for the soup.” He tried.
Harry stayed silent for a moment as if he was trying to decide if he was going to accept that apology or not. He then looked at Peter, examining his face. He must have thought that his classmate had suffered enough in the past few days to let this go, as he removed his hands from the soup. Things still felt tense, however. Peter thought about what to say to make things better, but the class started, meaning he would have to figure that out later.
Peter tried to focus during the lecture, but he was too busy feeling bad. It was probably the first time he had the opportunity to make a friend his age, and he might have thrown it all away, just because he got irritated. He really had learnt nothing at those charity galas it seems. Wanting to make things better, Peter tried to think of ideas, not paying as much attention as he should to one the professor was teaching, just enough to take notes at the most important times. He will curse himself for that later, for sure, however, it did not feel very important right now. As the class finally ended, Harry started to pack his things without saying a word, not being his usual chatty self. It was now or never. After panicking about what to say for a few seconds, Peter managed to formulate a sentence.
“Hey, do you want to hang out again? Not tonight because I still need to catch up with my studying but tomorrow night if you are free? We could watch something again and order some pizza? Or if you are not into pizza, we can have a fancy board thingy, since you seem to like that. Yeah, whatever you prefer really, I am really okay with anything, you know… I…”
As he started to ramble on, his friend stopped him.
“Peter. Pizza is fine. I’ll see you tomorrow night after class then.”
Peter tried his best to offer him a friendly smile as he got up and left. Well, at least he was still up for some pizza. Peter buried his head in his book, wanting to scream and stay there forever.
“Rough day?” A voice asked.
Peter raised his head and his eyes met Doctor Octavius’.
“I was not sleeping during the class, I swear, I just put my head like this for five seconds.” He tried to explain, panicking he had messed up twice in one morning.
“Don’t worry, Peter. I just thought I would check in on you after what happened the other night”.
The professor offered what was a mix between a heart-warming and an awkward smile.
“Oh. Thank you. Well, I am feeling better. And Harry got me soup so…”
The boy gestured towards the thermos still sitting where Harry had left it.
“That’s nice, very nice of him.”
Clearly, the man was interested in something else, as he was clearly not interested in listening to Peter talking about soup.
“Have you talked to at least the campus’ security?” He asked.
Well, the answer was no, but that would disappoint the professor, as he had asked him to report what happened. However, it was probably not the best idea to lie to him when maybe, somehow, he could check if Peter did.
“Not yet Doctor…” The student chose to say. “I have been meaning to, but I am still healing, and I have a lot of work to do.”
Doctor Octavius looked at him. He seemed disappointed, then worried. He shifted his weight to rest against the table Peter was sitting at.
“I hope it is for that reason, and not because you want to do something stupid, like putting yourself in danger again? Mmh?”
He looked into his student’s eyes, and it felt like he was looking more at his soul than his eyes. It reminded the boy of his mother, and her killer looks. She was not fun when angry. Once again, he did not want to straight out lie to his professor, but he was not about to admit to him what he did last night. That would be a truly terrible idea.
“I am doing my best to stay out of trouble. I have learnt my lesson.”
Well, technically that was true, he was doing his best considering his enormous curiosity. Did he go straight to asking questions and making himself very obviously suspicious? No! He observed from a safe distance, which was staying out of trouble, right? Yeah…
“Good to hear that. Take care of yourself, Peter. And rest, you look like you need it.” Doctor Octavius said leaving Peter the last person in the room.
Okay, apparently Peter did look bad today, which was not surprising considering what happened the night before. He gathered his belongings and rushed for his next class, not forgetting the precious soup.
Chapter 5: Pizza night
Notes:
Hi,
Sorry about the delay! I hope you will still enjoy this chapter.
Chapter Text
The soup had been delicious. Peter was usually not a big fan of soups, finding them rather boring. They had no consistency and a weird taste. He did not understand those soups-lovers. However, the little pieces of chicken and other unknown things really made it stand out from the rest. He had actually enjoyed eating it. It had also been comforting, in a way. The idea that someone made Peter soup to make him feel better was nice. And well, it worked, but there were still some things on his mind. Firstly, how he had treated Harry: a big yikes. It had come from his insecurities probably, not being used to having people actually want to be friends with him. Usually, people would either find him too lame or were only interested in his last name. Thus, he had become warry of people, being fine with only his big family and his robot. Luckly, there were more people in his family than just his parents. There were his grandparents, on his mother’s side, and all his parents’ friends. Peter knew quite a lot of celebrities, mostly superheroes his father worked with. If he had to be honest, his favourite had always been Uncle Bruce. He was so cool as he always had something new to teach his nephew but was also so nice. The student was proud of having his name as his middle name. Now he was missing Uncle Bruce. Hopefully, they could talk soon, he could always make up some homework questions he needed help with, he knew that his uncle would not deny him help with that. That was an indeed to keep in mind. There was Uncle Rhodey too. He was not as warm as Uncle Bruce, but Peter knew that he deeply cared for him. If he needed someone with a pragmatic mind or who would not sugar coat things, he could always turn to uncle Rhodey. He was also the best person to turn to when dealing with bullies. He had the tricks that actually worked.
The second thing Peter could not stop thinking about was obviously the shady things going on campus. He had not really had any time since the night he hid in a tree to keep investigating. Peter still had put up on his digital walls what ERI had found to sort out everything little by little. That did not mean he did not already have some theories. Yes, it is a bad idea to start theorising before having enough information, as you might have some issues with your confirmation bias, but he had not been able to stop himself. What Peter knew right now was that: one, the centre was doing some biological experiments where they needed volunteers. Two, they were ready to really hurt, probably to prevent any leak, some girl and beat up a stranger. Three, there was something they did not want word of it to come out, something really important that they messed up. The logical assumption was that they messed up some experiments or were doing “bad” experiments. Thus, the girl wanted to get the word out, to warn people, so they tried to silence her but failed when Peter intervened. What experiments were they doing? From what Peter had really quickly looked at there were a lot of things about genomes of animals with interesting qualities, some stuff about the evolution of species, and also some things about brain functions, some things about nature and nurture. That last thing sounded more like psychology to him at first, but he remembered hearing about it when studying evolution. Apparently, they were trying to see if it could prove some theories, using brain monitoring? Maybe that made sense, but honestly, that was not Peter’s area of expertise so… Still, what could be wrong with those types of things? What, a little lizard got loose? A volunteer was offended about something? Apart from the mistreatment of animals or some inappropriate conduct with volunteers, there was not much that could really go wrong it seems. Not saying that those things were not very bad and should not be punished, it was just not as… spicy as Peter would have hoped for. Maybe when looking more in detail at what ERI had found instead of just glancing over it, he would find something actually suspicious.
For the time being, Peter had other things to do. Indeed, after class, he was going to Harry’s place to hang out and eat pizza. They will probably continue the TV show they had started together, even though they had, admittedly, not said that explicitly. In any case, it was the opportunity to fix the first thing that had been torturing him. Yeah, no pressure, he just needed to salvage his first-ever friendship that he had with someone his age, why would he be nervous? The day of classes went quickly. The professors had not slowed down a bit, quite the opposite actually. MIT was really like running a marathon with the speed of a sprint. Always so much to do and so little time. Time really did fly, but at the same time, the suffering felt like it was taking forever. At least the topics were interesting. Well, some of them. Some others made Peter want to go hide in a cave and never go back. Yes. A cave would be very nice. Luckily, today was over and it was time to relax, so the cave could wait another day. As Harry and Peter did not share their last class today, Peter needed to meet him directly at his place. He somehow managed to remember where it was. However, he was not able to ring as Harry had not put his name on his button. He had warned him about it, so Peter simply called him, and his host came down to open the door.
“Hey!” Peter said smiling nervously.
“Hi. Come on in.”
Harry moved out of the way, so his guest entered the building. As they started walking to the lift, he could feel that some tension was still present. They had not really talked today as things were still weird. As they walked into the lift, Peter tried to start a conversation.
“I brought back your thermos. Your soup was really good, the best one I have ever eaten, if I am being totally honest. Who knew that soups could be so good?”
Peter saw what looked like a brief smile on Harry’s face as if he was happy to hear the compliments but did not want to show it. After a few moments of silence and when the lift’s doors open again, he finally replied:
“I am glad you liked it.”
Peter smiled, as he sounded more relax. They entered his flat, and they removed their coats, and made themselves more comfortable. Everything looked perfect once again as if nothing had been moved, not even by a centimetre or two. Peter was going to become self-conscious; his flat was definitely not as tidy. It was not a complete mess either… Well, it might become one with what he was researching, but that was more of a digital mess on the walls and holograms. That was not a real mess, right?
“So, how do we do that pizza thing? Do we call up a restaurant and see if they are willing to deliver it?” Harry asked, turning towards his friend.
Peter looked at him with a dumb look on his face. He was not saying what Peter thought he was saying, right? He must just be asking what the best place for pizzas was…
“Wait… You have ordered pizzas before, right?”
Harry calmly shook his head, as if it was normal.
“Have you ordered food before at least?!”
The host raised an eyebrow as if he did not get what the big deal was.
“Well, yes, I have arranged for restaurants to bring around food if I was really craving some but did not want to go out. We… usually get our meals done at home and now I am making some and getting the other from… someone that comes to do them.”
It was like he was trying to explain the situation without sounding really rich… but it still sounded like that. As if Peter’s family was not rich as well… but they still ordered take out from fast food way more often than they should. They had to thank his dad’s love for cheap cheeseburgers for that.
“So…” Peter started. “You are telling me you basically have never eaten fast food before… somehow?”
Harry nodded.
“Well, your body and health are about to hate me! But you are going to love it!”
Peter took out his phone and sat on the couch. Harry joined him, and the guest started showing him the process. He had to advise him on what pizza to get and what sides to try out based on what he liked eating. They ended up ordering a true feast. It was going to be so good. As they waited for the food, they started watching a bit of the TV show. The food took some time to get here, probably because of how much they had ordered, but when it did, Peter went to get it, borrowing Harry’s key to come back in case he got locked out. He generously tipped the delivery man and then struggled to get everything back to the flat without dropping anything. Once back there, he saw that Harry had prepared cutlery. He put all the boxes on the table, and then explained they would mostly only use the plates, as the tradition with fast food was to eat with one’s finger. Peter had to convince Harry that he was not joking about that, but he finally got around the idea and ate as it should be done while continuing the TV show. After eating so much he felt like he was going to explode, Peter stopped, and Harry did the same. There was still quite some food left, but they were just going to split everything and eat their part tomorrow, as to not waste anything. As the episode ended, Peter turned to his friend.
“So, did you enjoy your first fast food meal?” He asked.
Harry smiled.
“I have to admit, it was quite good! The quality of course is meh, but there is something about the taste…”
Peter smiled.
“That is the taste of fast food for you!”
“Also, not a big fan of eating directly with your hands, too messy for my taste, but if it is the sacrifice I have to make… I’ll take it!”
“Now be careful to not become a fast-food junkie!” Peter laughed.
They started clearing everything away and once done, they came back to the couch, sinking completely into it.
“You want to watch another episode?” Peter asked.
“Honestly, I feel like I need a bit of time to recover from our dinner, I would be unable to focus on the show right now.”
“Fair enough.”
They sat a bit of silent, the atmosphere getting a bit awkward once again. They had good times hanging out together, even though they only hung out twice outside of class, counting today but that was pretty much it. They did not really know each other. All of their interactions had rather been light and surface-level. Peter only knew Harry’s last name because of the picture of him and his father, otherwise he would have no idea.
“So… What made you want to come here and study for the major you chose?” Peter asked, looking a bit awkwardly to Harry.
Harry looked at him a bit surprised, not expecting that question apparently.
“Well… It’s that…” Harry bit his lip. “Well, it was expected that I would study biology. As I told you I already have some experience in it. It’s because my family works in it, but that is not really my thing. I prefer robotics and coding better, with a little dash of science still. It is just more my thing, and MIT is perfect for that so… Here I am.”
Peter nodded.
“I get what you mean, the expectation that you will study and get into your family’s field of research… I got lucky though, I had quite some freedom and actually ended up being interested in that field, robotics I mean. I do also like physics, which my parents are not complaining about!”
He laughed a bit. It was still something that his father knew very well and Uncle Bruce even more, but it was definitely not what Stark Industry was mainly known for, even if they actually used quite a lot of different areas of physics as it goes hand in hand with progress in robotics. Just not always Peter’s favourite ones. Harry looked at him for an instant, which was a bit weird, then talked again.
“You are talking about Stark Industry and all that, right?” He flat-out asked.
The surprise and shock made Peter blushed. He had at first expected him to know who his family was, suspecting that it was why he was trying to be friends with him, but this question really threw him off. He did not know if he should act chill, be very suspicious, or what else.
“Yeah…”
Peter felt defensive, waiting for how Harry was going to respond to see if he needed to be ready to fight or call him out. The young man seemed to notice his guest’s weird reaction. He hesitated a bit then moved slightly closer.
“It’s fine Peter, my father is…”
“Norman Osborn.” He cut him off.
Why did Peter do that, he had no idea.
“Sorry, I just saw a picture of you with him in your flat the other day.”
Harry shook his head.
“Don’t worry about it. But yes, he is my father, so I get the… possible defensiveness. I have quite a complicated relationship with my father. When I tell people my last name, they think right away about him… but he is not the proudest of me.”
He laughed nervously. Peter bit his lip. He could definitely relate to what people think, but he was apparently luckier than his friend.
“I get along with my parents very well, I love them so much and I know they would do anything for me. I really could not ask for better parents, I am so thankful that I was lucky enough to get adopted by them, and I would not change that for the world. Really. But I wish people… would understand I am not a clone of them, that I am my own person. Either they want to rant about my parents or use me to meet them…”
Harry titled his head a bit to the side as if he was puzzled by what Peter had just said.
“You are adopted? I did not know that.”
“I am.” He said as he nodded. “It is not really a secret, just something we have never announced officially, because it is nobody’s business. I guess people assume my mother was really good at keeping her pregnancy secret and then me for the first years of my life, rather than I am adopted. Which is very weird. But yes, I got adopted quite young. I must have been something like… 5? I am not sure to be honest, that is not really something we talk about.”
“Right. Do you have any memories from your family before you got adopted?”
Peter scratched the back of his head.
“Not really to be honest. I have no memories of my biological parents, none, I do not know if I ever lived with them. I do have memories from my aunt though, Aunt May. I was living with her before I got adopted. I don’t really know what happened, or why I was removed. I just know that she had a very sweet smile, and the rest I am not sure if they are memories or things I made up, if that makes sense.”
Harry nodded.
“It does. Haven’t you ever asked your parents about her? Aren’t you curious?”
Peter shrugged.
“I trust there was a very good reason for me to be removed from her care and I have the best family I could ever hopped for, with my parents and all the aunts and uncles I have now. I was basically spoiled my whole childhood and hung out with my parents’ friends all the time. I have all the family I need. I do miss her from time to time, but if she wanted and was able to have a relationship with me… She would have contacted my parents, so…”
“That is fair enough.”
The guest smiled a bit, thinking of his family. He loved them so much, more than everything in the word, even his family robots were important to him. He was lucky to have such a good family. It seemed to not be the case for Harry.
“What about you? You said something about your father not being proud of you.”
“Yes… He… expects me to do better, to become a biology genius like him, to follow in his footsteps to one day run the company. My mother used to be here to calm him down but now…” Harry sighed. “Pretty ironic, your family seems to be open to you doing anything you like, but you are still in part studying in the field of the family business when my father absolutely wants me to do that, but I do not…”
Peter felt bad for him. It must be hard to have that much pressure from your father. He did not know what was up with his mother, if she was gone, she left them or she did not care anymore, but that did not sound good either.
“I am sorry to hear that. You should be able to study and do whatever you want to.”
Peter tried to give him a sympathetic smile, but that was not his strong suit at all. Trying was still better than doing nothing.
“Thanks, Pete.” His friend answered. “I really appreciate it.”
“You know I hate that nickname!” He retorqued.
Harry simply laughed. At least he was laughing and not crying about what they were talking about, so that was good. Harry gave him a soft punch on his shoulder.
“Relax, it is an affectionate nickname.”
Peter raised an eyebrow.
“Right.”
The two boys sat a bit in silence. The logical thing to do now would be to either put another episode or for Peter to go back to his flat. However, Peter liked just sitting there, enjoying the moment. It was rare to be able to just sit with someone and not feel awkward. Maybe Harry could become an actual friend, a close one. That would be very nice to experience. He smiled slightly at the thought. He then looked at Harry, using the conner of his eye. Clearly, he was not trying to be his friend for bad reasons, but something still worried Peter: the place he worked out. Indeed, he knew something shady was going on there, but he did not know what. Peter bit his lip. Should he approach the subject? Try to see if he knew anything? Not that he would tell him if he was part of a big shady string of experiments or cover-ups. Still… maybe he knew something he did not realise was bad or would show signs of clearly being guilty of something.
“So, at the place you work out, what experiments are you guys doing?” he asked, looking at his host.
Harry shifted a bit to better look at him.
“Well, I am not actually involved in the experiments, to be honest. I don’t have enough experience for that. I mostly share with them the knowledge that I have from working a bit at Oscorp. That means I mostly debate them about what certain findings mean, if certain things would be possible to realise, those kinds of things. More theoretical things and analysis of results, if that makes sense? I am just there to give my opinion because somehow, being the son of Norman Osborn makes my opinion worth something. Don’t ask me why, I don’t get it.”
He laughed a bit. Peter looked at him. What he was saying did make sense, it would have been weird for him to actually be involved in the experiments. He seemed to be only told what was absolutely necessary, so he probably did not know of any dark secrets.
“Right. At least it will look good on your cv later on, I guess.”
Peter hesitated again, not knowing if it was a good idea to say that, but he felt the need to… so finally decided to say it anyway.
“Just… be careful, okay?”
He looked Harry right in his eyes, trying to make him understand that he was serious, even if what he just said probably sounded ridiculous. Harry looked at him back, confused and concerned. It was as if he was trying to read Peter’s mind to understand why he had said that.
“It’s fine Peter, I am not even one of the volunteers, nobody is even experimenting on me, nothing is going to happen to me because I am giving my opinion.”
Once again, he laughed, but slightly forced. He was probably unnerved and uncomfortable by what his friend had said.
“Let’s watch a second episode and call it a night. We have a lot of work tomorrow.” He added.
Peter nodded quickly, still embarrassed but worried.
“Yeah, sorry. Let’s do that.”
Harry played the second episode.
The episode was nice, and they enjoyed it. Once it was over, Peter got his part of the leftovers, as they were way too many for Harry to finish before they would go bad. It would be very unhealthy for him to attempt to do so anyway. Peter then shoved a few glass containers in his bag, which made it a bit heavy, but the food was worth it. He offered to bring them back the next day, after switching the food to his Tupperware, but Harry told him he could just bring them back once he was done with the food, as he had plenty of them. They agreed on that. As Peter was going to say goodbye and leave Harry, he insisted on walking him home. His guest tried to assure him he would be fine, but Harry seemed worried he would get beaten up again. Peter tried to use that argument against him, saying that he could get beaten up, but apparently, he had taken some self-defense classes in the past. Peter better not tell him he was still having escapades during the night then, otherwise he would probably chew him out for it.
They walked together, simply enjoying the silence of the night and each other company. It was a very nice walk. It felt very peaceful and… somehow comfortable. It was a good feeling. Finally, the two students arrived at Peter’s place. The boy awkwardly turned towards Harry and tried to offer him a smile, even thought that was definitely not his strongest suit. He had pictures to prove it.
“Well… Yeah, here I am. Thank you for walking me home. Be careful on your way back.”
Harry smiled softly and nodded.
“I will. Thank you for coming over, it was a really nice evening. We should do it again when we have the time.”
It was Peter’s turn to nod.
“Definitely. I’ll see you later.”
“See you too.”
Peter awkwardly hurried up inside and close the building’s door behind him. As he quickly walked to the lift, he could feel his face burning, especially on the cheeks. Oh god, what was happening to him now. That was truly ridiculous. He went back to his flat, put the food in the fridge, and buried himself in homework before he could start overthinking the evening he had just spent with his friend.
Chapter 6: It was at this moment, Peter knew…
Notes:
Hi,
The mentions of animals as testing subjects start at “Well, Peter got lucky it seemed”, but nothing graphic (there are some other references later on and will be in other chapters, so not all mentions can be avoided and have the story still makes sense. I do try to limit the graphic parts though).
The graphic part starts at “Things quickly took a turn” and ends at “Peter finally reached the light.” This part can be skipped without missing crucial information.If you like listening to music as you read, I would recommend listening to The Shining's music in the opening scene when things start taking a turn in the chapter (as it was what I was listening to when I wrote this).
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It was nice having a friend around, no doubt about it, but it was hard to maintain a friendship while going to MIT and doing some research on the sneaky doings of your friend’s workplace. The boys wanted to hang out but did not have the time. Hell, Peter did not even have the time to dye his hair even though it was definitely time. The strawberry blond was already peeking through the brown hair. He will have to take care of it before it becomes ridiculous. Peter had been dying his hair for quite a while now, choosing a colour closer to the one his father had. It made him feel better somehow. It did not give him necessarily confidence, but more comfort. His mother had been a little hurt though, as she loved his natural hair colour, it being very close to hers, but she did not take it personally. His parents had never been the controlling type. Well… unless they thought their son was in danger, but that was fair enough. It also was, however, exactly why the young Stark did not tell them about his investigation, even though they could have maybe helped. Uncle Bruce would have been the perfect ally with his PhDs in Biomedical Engineering and Biochemistry, but he would have probably ratted his nephew out to his parents. Peter did not really want to risk that. Instead, he had to learn about a new scientific field while studying a completely different one. Fun times. Peter’s sleep schedule was not at all messed up.
By some miracle, Peter was still doing good with his university work, especially in Doctor Octavius’s class as it was still his favourite, and felt the need to succeed in it even more to impress the lecturer. He was still talking to his family somehow regularly and made quite some progress in prepping for his investigation. So much so that he was feeling ready to go to the next step, even if that next step was completely crazy and could get him into in a lot of trouble. He needed to go investigate directly where everything was going down. Unfortunately, he had to sneak in, as they would never hire a first-year with absolutely no background in biology and he did not want to risk putting Harry in trouble, especially if they did do shady stuff. Peter would never forgive himself if his friend got attacked like that girl the other night, but with no one to step in this time. Speaking of her, Peter had tried to track her down but had no such luck. He was really hoping she was okay. Maybe if he managed to get to the employee data, he would find her. A lot of things to get to, and probably barely any time to do so. Hence why Peter had planned as much as possible.
First, he had observed the famous back entrance, as it would obviously be his entry point. It was either that or the reception, and he did not feel very confident about that second one. He had observed the back of the building enough to have a pretty good idea of the schedule of the people using that entrance. It was not completely reliable, as people did some time break schedule, but it was good enough. That entrance was not used that much, but Peter would really like to avoid ending up face-to-face with some big scary dude as he was trying to break in. Then, Peter pulled up all the schematics of the building he could find to know a general layout of the place. That would let him know where to hide and not where to get stuck. However, they were pretty old, as those kinds of things are not really kept up to date, especially not the ones some guy who was not a crazy good hacker could find. It meant that, once again, it was not as reliable as the boy would have wished for them to be. However, something that could be completely trusted, was Peter’s gadgets, and he was not a Stark for nothing. He had turned his flat into an improvised workshop and, using Eri’s help, made a lot of things that would be possibly very useful. Firstly, he had found a way to discreetly break in without making too much noise or being too obvious. Well, he had found two of them but was not sure which would work the best, not knowing much about the lock on the door. One used a metal that he was able to melt very quickly to then solidify as quickly, using a mould he would first insert in the keyhole to get the shape. The other one was basically… nanotech. If none of them worked… A little bit of brute force helped by basic gadgets should do the trick. It would simply be more… obvious, and anyone coming back will notice it. Then there were some little ducks USB keys, the kinds that will download everything that is on the computer that they are connected to, but also some self-defence things. Peter had some ameliorated tasers and pepper spray. He made them more discrete and a bit more effective. He could have built some crazy things, but the taser already seemed like a lot. He did not want to get in prison if he was caught with those things. Well… the smart thing then would have to simply not break into a laboratory, but that bad decision was already made.
When the time came, Peter left his flat. He was wearing all black to be as discrete as possible and had a little backpack to carry all his inventions, and if he needed to steal some things even if the plan was to disturb as less things as possible. He wanted to be like a ghost, that his presence would never be noticeable. He hid near his favourite tree, waiting for the two usual men to leave the building he was planning on infiltrating. When they finally did, Peter checked the watch he wore for the occasion. They were right on time, perfect. He let them disappear into the night before making his way quickly to the door. He was at the first step of his plan: breaking in. He tried his two fancy gadgets. Of course, none of them worked, because that would have been too easy. Brute force it was. He slid through the tiny opening of the keyhole a little device, covered it with what looked like a thin cloth, took a few steps back… and magic, the door opened with a slight “boom”. Luckily, his ameliorated cloth had muffled nearly all the noise. Peter took it back and sneaked inside, making sure to close the door behind him.
Peter looked around. He was alone, good, he did not have to freak out yet. The place looked cramped. There were very tall shelves everywhere, full of scientific supplies. It was supposed to be a hallway, but it looked more like a very long storage room. Everything was neatly organised with clear labels. It seemed like they were just lacking space, not being messy. As Peter advanced quietly in the hallway, he read as many labels as possible. There was a wide range of equipment, but mostly what would be used in the kind of research he had read about, which made sense. He was however not sure where to go. He needed to be careful and not go to a room with people in it. After listening to a few doors, he picked one. If he remembered correctly, it was supposed to be a big room, which would hopefully be interesting and not full of boring equipment.
Well, Peter got lucky it seemed, or at least he thought he was. The room was far from boring, that the least one could say. There were shelves alright, but full of lab rats. And hamsters. And lizards. And spiders. He had found the non-human test subjects they should have been experimenting on, but then, why did they need human volunteers as well? He took a step forward to properly close the door. It was not well lit, probably to not disturb too much the animals, and the room felt very narrow, as the rows of shelves were very close to each other’s. They could not have that many test subjects… right? A faint light was coming from the end of the room. It could be a computer, which would be very useful. Peter could put his USB key on it and hopefully get at the details of the experiments. However, before getting there, he took out his phone and turned on his flashlight. As he stepped forward, he took a closer look at the animals. Most of them seemed normal, with only information on their little sheet of paper a bunch of dates and corresponding code he could not understand. The student took pictures of them, hoping to be able to understand what they meant later and to possibly get some proof.
Things quickly took a turn as he got closer to the computer. With every step he took, the sicker and more injured the test subjects were. There were lizards with no tails, some with dead tails scattered across the floor of their cage, or even one with three tails. Rats and hamsters were missing limbs as well, some looked barely alive. However, the worst ones, two of them, were… bashing their heads against their cage. Peter felt sick as if he was about to throw up. What were they doing to those poor rats that would make them hurt themselves so much their brains were starting to stick out? The spiders were the only ones that seemed fine, but some of them probably had issues as well. They had made webs in such a chaotic way, not in the neat and organised way you would expect, with a clear pattern. It was sometimes even hard to see if there was a spider in the box with all the web in it. Of course, they also had their share of body mutilation, as some had missing legs, and others had extra legs. Apparently, the research centre had taken its research in genomes and evolution way too far. No way in hell the university was okay with that. Was Harry okay with that…? He could not be… He had to be ignorant. He had said they were talking to him about theoretical things… He might just think they were only speaking from a theory standpoint, but they would actually go through with the experiments.
Peter finally reached the light. It was indeed a computer screen on saving mode. There were a couple of them. There were also other rows of animals, but he did not think he had the stomach to see what they kept further from the entrance, as it would be probably even worse. He was satisfied just jamming his USB key in the computer and running away with the information he would get and the pictures he had taken. Once the key was inserted, he let it do its work, letting it bypass the security measure by itself and copying absolutely everything that was on the computer, even hidden files and that sort of thing. He turned on the other computer and did the same to it, with a second key. He waited nervously, his leg bouncing uncontrollably. It felt like he would have to wait forever for those keys to finish. He was scared of being caught, even more so now that he saw what they did to their poor animal test subject. He did not want to imagine what they would do to him. Would they just… make him go silent like they tried to do to the girl, or would he become a lab rat as well? This thought gave him chills down his spine. He wished he could let all of those poor animals go, but he knew that just letting them go free would not do much. The researchers would just get new ones.
As the USB key were about to finish their work, Peter heard noises coming from the door. Fuck, someone was about to come in. He turned his attention to the screens and had to fight the urge to swear out loud. Just one more second… The door was now opening. The boy ripped out the keys as soon as they were done and moved back into the shadows. Footsteps could be heard, coming towards the back of the room. He needed to hide, and fast. Going against his gut, the student quickly went behind the last row of high shelves and hid in the dark. He could only imagine the horrors he was standing next to. He was now glad that the lights were off, so he did not actually have to see them. It was also helpful when hiding. The door opened again, and a second set of footsteps was heard.
“So, who are we working on now?” A woman's voice asked.
“Subject 52. It showed signs of stabilising and actual regeneration after the last round of experiments. We need to monitor its progress to see if we have found the right combination or if this is only temporary and he will end up like the others.” Answered a man's voice.
“Right. And where is this monstrosity located?”
“Row 8, Shelf 3, Place 2B.”
Peter held his breath, waiting to find out if he was at row 8, as he did not really have the time to count the rows when hiding. The woman walked towards him. Not good. He went further back. Oh no, she was coming to his row… fuck, fuck. He looked behind him quickly, he was going to have to hide in the darkest corner… which was of course the one against the cages. As he was about to have a mental breakdown about that, the woman seemed to turn in his direction. As silently and discreetly as possible, he put his body against the shelf to disappear in the darkness. The woman stayed still for a few moments. Peter did his best to not shake, feeling absolutely terrified by what he was leaning against, and by what might happen if he was seen. Luckily, the silhouette of the woman moved again and grabbed something from the shelf, probably the cage she had come looking for. As she left the row, Peter let a discrete sigh of relief. He however decided to not move just yet, as he was scared that even the tiniest noise would alarm the woman. He must have been going crazy, as he felt a tingle in his hair. He wanted to scratch himself, but once again, was too scared to do so. Finally, the two employees started to leave, and Peter backed away from the shelves. He was safe, he would be able to just get back home, and send everything to some newspaper or TV network for them to expose the lab. As he heard the door open, a piercing sensation on the side of his neck made him jump. It was as if someone had stabbed him with the tiniest needle.
“Wait. Did you hear that?” The woman asked.
Peter was freaking out. Something had just attacked him, but he could not defend himself, as that would make too much noise. He was breathing too fast, it felt like he was having a panic attack and was probably being too loud.
“Heard what?”
A second needle stab was felt towards his shoulder, but this time the boy did his best to not move, hoping the two employees would just leave already so he could defend himself instead of being a sitting duck.
“… Nothing, it was probably just one of those crazy rats. Let’s go, I don’t want to work overtime again.”
The door finally closed behind them as they left. Peter started hitting himself trying to fight against whatever had been attacking him. When he finally stopped, he waited a bit, trying to see if he had won the fight. He did not feel anything, so he must be safe. At least he hoped. In any case, he needed to get out of there right now. He did not want something, or someone, else attacking him. Peter hurried up to the door, being careful to stay clear of the cages. He pushed his ear against the door, trying to listen for when it was safe to come out. After a few minutes, he felt that it was now or never. Peter slowly opened the door and looked outside. No one. He moved a bit out of the room, looking around, no one still. He left the room and rushed to the exit. He quickly made it there, and as soon as he stepped foot outside, he ran. He ran so fast he felt like his lungs were about to explode and he was going to throw up. He did not stop until he was at his building’s entrance. With shaking hands, he unlocked the main door, before pressing the lift’s button multiple times, as if his life depended on it.
Finally, he was back in his flat, but the sense of urgency did not go away. Ignoring Eri’s busing, probably coming to see Peter, he went straight to the bathroom. He made it just in time, right after lifting the toilet’s cover and seat, he threw up. He did not stop throwing up, even when only bile was left. Peter wanted to stand up, instead of being all crawled up against the toilet, to be able to wash his mouth, but he felt too weak to do so. His body entire body was shaking, his throat was on fire, and so was his neck and left shoulder. This was not only due to shock, that spider must have done something bad to him.
“Should I call for an ambulance or a doctor, Peter?” Asked a robotic voice.
The boy tried to look in the direction of the bathroom’s entrance, but his vision was so blurry he could barely see anything. There was some kind of shape, but not human… It must have been Eri.
“I… Leave me alone… I just need… Alone.”
If Peter had been well enough to think rationally, he would have demanded for an ambulance to be called right now. Instead, he seemed to lose a piece of his mind for each passing second. He heard some busing sounds, meaning that Eri was moving, probably away, but he had a feeling she was keeping him in her line of view, which was smart. He tried to move a bit to finally be able to take care of himself, or at least flush his vomit, but his entire body felt way too heavy and soon enough, everything went to black.
Peter’s head was hurting so much, it felt like someone was drilling holes in it. His entire body felt like he had the biggest workout session of his life the previous day, which would not be that impressive as he never worked out, and he had a disgusting taste in his mouth. The smell was very bad as well. He slowly opened his eyes, trying to figure out where he was, and nearly jumped out of his skin seeing something arched over him. Once his vision became clearer, he realised it was Eri, probably watching over him to make sure he was not dying in his sleep.
“What… What happened?” He muttered.
“You came home very sick and refused that I call a doctor or an ambulance” Answered Eri.
Last night was completely blurry right now, the young man had no idea how he had ended up in this state. He stood up slowly, wincing at the throbbing pain in his head. Once he was completely up on his feet, with a hand on the wall to help balance himself, he found the source of the bad smell. He had thrown up in the toilet and did not flush. It had sat in there all night, which was disgusting. He flushed it and made his way to his sink where he brushed his teeth as well as he could.
“Harry Osborn has texted you. You were supposed to meet him to study. I took the liberty to send him a reply informing him you were currently unavailable and to not wait for you. He has requested you call him when you have the chance. Your parents also requested that you call them this evening once your mother is done with work.” Said Eri.
Right, they were supposed to start working on their robotic project together, brainstorming and coming up with a plan.
“Harry… Fuck.”
That was going to be an interesting conversation if Peter could not remember how he got sick. Hopefully, it will come back later as the fog on his mind gets lifted. He rinsed his mouth multiple times, wanting the taste completely gone, then turned to Eri.
“I will call him soon. You can tell my parents that they can call me around 6 pm.”
Peter started walking to his bedroom, or rather crawling against the hallway wall until he reached his bedroom as the robot followed him.
“I have also ordered some medication that can help you get on your feet. The tracking information indicates they should arrive in the next hour or so. However, it would be wiser to book an appointment with a doctor. Should I do that for you? I have already selected the ones with the best ratings and the soonest availability.”
Peter grunted as he tried to slowly sit on his bed, but ended up going faster than he had planned, making his head hurt even more.
“Later, Eri.”
The AI seemed to give him a disapproving look. Even though she had no face, she had figured out somehow how to move and place her arm in a way to communicate what she thought.
“May I at least order you some food from one of your saved order lists?”
“Yes, please. The usual from McDonald’s would be fine.” He replied.
Peter gathered all of his strength and started undressing. Once done, he slowly stood up and made his way to his wardrobe. It would have been better to shower first, but he did not have enough energy for that, so changing clothes was better than nothing. He started putting on the clothes, going for the most relaxed ones he had. As Peter put on his shirt, he felt a strange sensation on his fingertips. Once the shirt was on him, he naturally tried to let go of the shirt, but he could not. He was not holding the shirt anymore, but it seemed to follow his fingertips.
“Huh?”
He tried to look, confused, but he felt dizzy looking down. His fingers’ muscles must have tensed up without him realising, and he was still holding the shirt or something. He went to sit down. He took a few breaths, trying to relax. Once he felt less dizzy, he tried to let go of his shirt again. It still did not work. Was Peter still holding onto the shirt? He slowly looked towards his hands. The fingers were not wrapped around the shirt, only his fingertips were touching it, as he had thought. That was really weird. Maybe his hands were sticky? No, he had put on his trousers without any issues. Then his shirt was sticky somehow when it was supposed to be cleaned. Great, did he use too much laundry detergent while doing laundry and his shirt got all the sticky remnants? He needed to get better at this. Trying to hold the shirt with one hand, without getting it stuck on the sticky parts as well, he tried to pull his fingers off the shirt. Okay, it was some really sticky detergent, he might have to change brands or something. He slowly ended up using all his force even if it felt exhausting. He was not going to spend the day stuck to his shirt. He heard something rip and Peter’s hand finally flew free. Still confused, he looked at his hand.
“What the…”
The shirt was still stuck to his fingers. Well, part of his shirt rather. He looked at what should have been his entire shirt, there was a hole in it, matching what was on his hand. This could not just be some sticky detergent; something was happening to him. Peter’s breathing started to accelerate as he kept looking frantically at his hand and shirt.
“What’s happening, what’s happening…”
He took a few steps back, trying to not totally freak out, but ended up falling on his bed. He rushed back to his feet. He wanted to escape. To where? He did not know, to anywhere without sticking things probably. As he rose again, his comforter stood up with him. It was somehow stuck to his neck and the back of his hands, which was all the exposed skin he had. He tried to shake it off, but it did not work. He wanted to try to rip it off, but what if it had the same result as the shirt?
“Okay…. Peter calm down…. Peter, it’s fine…”
“May I be of assistance, Peter?” Asked Eri.
Right, she had probably heard him totally freaked out.
“It’s fine, I just need to shower.”
On that note, he bolted straight for the bathroom. Getting through the doorframe with a comforter stuck to you was tricky. Getting in the shower, was way worse. After much struggle, Peter managed to get in, and he let it rain. He scrubbed himself as much as possible. After quite some time, he was finally free of the now-soaked comforter. He dried himself, put the comforter in the drier, and went to get his food that had finally arrived.
Notes:
The title of this chapter is a reference to my favourite vine (yes, I know it died forever ago, but I thought it would fit perfectly for this chapter) "It was at this moment Jackson knew..."
Also, about the dodgy science/technology: ... shhh, just go with it, please? I wish I was as smart as Tony (or as Peter is supposed to be), but I am not.
Chapter 7: I'm sorry, Sir Newton
Notes:
Hi,
I hope you enjoy this chapter! I have been considering changing a bit the chapter release schedule. This is a very busy, and stressful, period of the year for me, so even if I do sometime find time to work on the story, I do not have that much time nor energy. We are more than halfway into the chapters I have written (I have 13 already written in total). I see 3 options, and right now I am thinking about doing number 3, but please do let me know what you would prefer. Option 1 is I stick to the new chapter every Sunday schedule until I run out of chapters already written, and then I just post whenever I have finished a new chapter. Option 2 is I post a chapter every two weeks (which would leave me quite to write). Option 3 is to alternate between 1 week and 2 weeks between each chapter (it would go a week between chapter 7 and 8, two weeks between 8 and 9, a week between 9 and 10, and so on) which means waiting less time in total for you guys, but it still will allow me to get to a less busy period of time when I can write much more before I run out of chapters. So yeah, please let me know what you would prefer!
Chapter Text
As the day went on, Peter started to feel better, and his thoughts became clearer. He was still not sure what exactly had happened the day before, but he knew he went to investigate at the research facility. He could only recall until he entered the building. After that, it was very messy. At first, it had been like a hole in his mind, but now it seemed to come back piece by piece, so he was trying to be patient. Objects kept sticking to him, which was very weird, but he was too preoccupied with trying to remember to really realise how weird that was. Peter had texted Harry back, explaining he felt unwell, but should feel better soon. Harry offered to come bring over food and give him a hand if he needed help with something, but the boy declined while thanking him quite warmly. If he had caught something in the lab, he did not want to infect his friend. It was most probably just shock though, and to deal with that he needed to be alone for a bit. He still planned to talk to his parent at 6 pm to not worry them. He could not deal with a worried Mrs and Mr Stark right now. He will just need to look alive, which was no easy job at the moment.
He tried to study, but his brain was not up to the task. Not only he was paranoid he was going to damage the book containing the chapter he was supposed to read by somehow sticking to it, but now every time he would sit down and try to actually read it, he felt this wave… of hyperawareness. He had dealt with anxiety before, especially as a kid, but this felt different. Instead of thinking of everything that could go wrong, it was more as if his body was on high alert for any danger. He did not feel necessarily scared or as if he was about to be hurt, but everything around him was so… loud and clear. Eri busing around in the living room would take him straight out of his book as his brain was suddenly focusing on that. It was quite annoying. Peter closed his blinds and his door, and then put his headphones on, blocking every possible distraction. However, this hyper-awareness persisted, as if there was something in him still constantly analysing his surroundings. Peter had to give up, focusing on resting to feel better quickly.
6 pm came surprisingly fast. Peter felt as if only one hour had passed when around seven of them had. Feeling under the weather was really messing with his sense of time. Had he been injected with drugs or something? He knew far too little about them to form any theory on that. Before settling down on his couch to get ready to call his parents, he had looked at himself in the mirror to see if he still looked quite sick. It was way better than this morning for sure, but he still looked a little pale. Nothing he could not blame on studying too much. That was going to be the official reason he looked the way he did. Nearly immediately after that 5:59 became 6:00, Peter’s phone started to ring. It was his mother, as they had agreed. The boy took a deep breath and answered the video call.
“Hi, Mom!”
“Hi, sweetie! Oh, I have missed you so much you know, we should call more often!” She said.
As always, she looked simply perfect. Her hair was in a tight bun, as she always kept it well-tied when she went to work. Her face looked as vibrant as ever, full of energy and life, not the kind you would expect to see on someone working so much, and her smile… Her smile was probably the most reassuring and comforting thing in the universe. As soon as Peter saw it, he instantly felt better, both mentally and physically. That was exactly what he needed, a smile from his mother.
“I have missed you too! I cannot wait to come back for Christmas to see you and Dad!” He replied.
“Oh honey, if you knew what your father has started to plan for your return… It’s like he is going crazy without you. I think that it is hard for him to not be able to build things with you anymore. But he is so proud of you, you should see him when he talks about how amazing you are to anyone that would listen… To be honest, I do that too at work.”
She laughed a bit. As for her son, he had a bitter-sweet smile. He, too, was missing working with his father. They would spend so much time in that garage, Pepper would have to drag them out from there so they would come eat. It was so hard being away from his parent, but he was making them proud and he was starting his own life. This was his chance to show the world who Peter Stark really was, that he was not just Tony Stark’s son. He was his own person, with his own qualities, personality, intelligence, and knowledge. He was not about to mess this chance up.
“I miss working with him too. You can tell him that when I come back, I will show him the thing I have been working on for my robotics class. It’s pretty awesome, I am sure his going to love it.” Peter replied.
“You can tell him yourself! He has just arrived home with the surprise!”
The camera shifted, becoming less steady as his mom was walking. It seemed she was walking through the living room of the Malibu villa.
“To tell you the truth, he is there because I begged him to come keep your dad busy before he invented something I could not handle. You know how he gets.” His mother whispered to the phone.
Peter frowned, wondering what his mother was talking about, as he was about to ask, Uncle Bruce’s face appeared on the screen.
“Uncle Bruce! You came to visit! I wish I was there, it has been so long.”
“Hi, Peter. I know, I was so busy with my research this past year. It is the first time this year I am taking a holiday. Hopefully, I will be able to take one for Christmas as well so I can see you! How’s school?”
As Peter was about to answer, his father appeared behind his uncle and started to talk excitedly:
“He has made a friend! He is also the smartest kid in his class, answering all the questions, showing everyone who’s gonna crush them.”
Peter blushed hearing all of that, parts because of how proud his dad seemed to be of him, but also the way he had referred to Harry to. He had said that “friend” part in such a weird way. Did Peter give some weird impression to his father during their few phone calls or was he imagining things? He was probably being over-sensitive as Harry was his first age-appropriate friend, so he was not used to people referring to someone as his friend. It was not like there was anything more to it, so that was probably why.
“Oh, you’ve made a friend, Peter? What’s their name?” Asked Uncle Bruce. “And I am not surprised you are doing well, you are such a bright young man. I cannot wait to see what you will do later in life.”
“His name is Harry, we share most classes. Thank you, Uncle Bruce.” Peter answered.
He had not told his parents Harry’s last name. It was not because he was scared they might be angry he was friends with someone that was not even their direct rival, they would not care too much about that. They might just be concerned at first if he might be using Peter. He did not tell them simply because he did not see the point. Who cared who Harry’s father was? That was something he liked about their friendship; they could both understand what it was like being the son of some famous, how it could complicate one’s life and relationship. Thus, they just both acted as if they were some random guys with a perfectly normal family. Well, except when they did open up a bit to each other about that, for example during that pizza night, but that was different.
“I would love to meet him someday. What cool things have you learnt, Peter?” Asked Bruce.
The four of them talked for quite a while. That was exactly what the young man had been needed. He was able to relax and feel totally safe with them. It was as if his paranoia had disappeared. Even his body felt less heavy and far less… sticky. He stayed on the couch for a bit, letting that good feeling sink in. He looked a bit around him, taking in all the decorations his parents had put in the living room, wanting to keep feeling close to them. A picture frame caught his eyes. He slowly stood up and approached the bookshelf it was sitting on, right next to the massive flat screen. Peter did not know why they bought one so big, it really was not necessary. In between books which were a mix of physics and robotics textbooks, and some fiction books too, there were a few pictures in frames. However, one was much bigger than the others. It was his favourite. It was him and his parents, in the Malibu garage, after they just finished building Eri. Peter looked so young in it. His mother was as beautiful as always, with her bright smile, as she stood between the two men of her life. She seemed to not mind all the mess that in the garage, which was rare. His dad had his signature charismatic smile, but his eyes were filled with pride. His posture showed it as well, his head held high and his shoulder having a confident pose. Peter looked a lot shyer, half hidden behind Eri, but it was possible to see what looked like a small smile if you looked close enough.
It had been his first big project with his father. It had been a key point of their relationship, as it was how they started bonding. The young boy had one day come to watch his new father work in his workshop, intrigued by all of the noise he was making, even if his new mother had told him to stay away from it in fear he would get hurt. His father, never passing on the opportunity to show off to an audience, had started explaining what he was doing to the kid, and just like that, started to teach him robotics as the boy picked up everything surprisingly fast. Soon enough, Peter was learning to build things himself under the supervision and teaching of his father. His mom had not been happy about that at first, being scared that her son would get hurt, but she soon enough realised it was helping Peter a lot to open up.
Peter went to grab the picture, his hand reaching for it, but he stopped. What if his hand was still sticky? He did not want to damage it, as it was a such meaningful gift from his parents. He hesitated for a second. He could do it. Whatever was happening to him, he was not going to stick to the picture. He was going to take it slowly, look at it, and put it back on the shelf without any issue. Focusing hard, Peter slowly grabbed the picture and brought it closer to him, allowing him to have a better look at it. He smiled slowly, savouring the memory, even if it was so old that it was quite blurry. That did not matter, it still felt so comforting. After a few moments, he decided it was time to put it back. It was the moment of truth. He slowly put it back on the shelf but kept holding it for a second. Peter then took a deep breath and slowly let go. It worked. He had a sigh of relief. Looked like things were going back to normal, finally.
As Peter was about to decide it was time to go back to trying to study, all of his missing memories hit him at once. He finally remembered what was in the research centre. All the animals… They had had horrible experiences done to them. Really messed up things. Something had bitten him as well, on his neck and shoulder, when he was trying to hide… The USB keys. He had copied all the info on the USB keys. He dashed to his bedroom. They must be in his clothes, in some random pockets. Peter grabbed his old clothes, trying to look in every pocket, but his hands started sticking again.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck…”
Peter’s breathing got faster as he struggled with the clothes. He would force his hand into a pocket, find nothing in it, but not be able to remove his hand. Some fabric got ripped again. As the boy looked everywhere multiple times, what once was his clothes became shreds. His hands still sticking to most of the pieces, Peter realised the keys could not still be in one of his pockets. They must have fallen on the floor somewhere. He started searching his entire bedroom, but the flat itself ended up becoming just one big mess. After what felt like forever, the boy just let himself go on the floor. The landing was rough, his behind hurting on impact, but he did not care. He slowly put his head in his hands, as he realised how badly he had messed up. The entire point of going to the lab was to get proof of what they were doing, now, there was no proof, not even a single, miserable, picture except of some stupid labels. How could have Peter messed up that badly?! How could he be so incompetent…
“Please, leave me alone Eri. Not now.” He said, hearing some busing sound growing louder.
He must have sounded upset as the busing became more distant. Peter stayed like this for a while, not wanting to face the fact that he had failed in such an embarrassing way. Hiding like that forever would have been nice, staying in denial, however, it was pretty boring. He finally decided to move. He went to remove his head from his hand, but his hands followed.
“You’ve got to be kidding…” He tried to say, but most of it probably got muffled.
Peter tried harder. It was as if his face’s skin had a severe sunburn, itching and burning, but it was still stuck to his hands. He moved his weight from his behind to his knees, wanting to see if he could at least stand up. That made the world spin, his balance clearly lacking when he could not see anything. If he was going to try to stand while like this, he was going to fall right back down. To try to avoid this, he slowly made his way up onto his knees. He then leaned his side on the closest wall to try to get some support. Peter shifted around, going from being on his knees to crouching, and started to slowly stand up. As he was about to succeed, he felt himself falling backward. Peter’s reflexes kicked in and, by some miracle, his hands came off of his face. He hurried, trying to hold onto the wall, even though there was nothing to hold onto.
Strangely, Peter stopped falling. Everything was still spinning around him, so it took him a minute to figure out what was happening. He was not exactly on his feet, more on his heels, still being at an angle. Okay, that meant that Peter managed to grab onto something. He followed his arm with his eyes to see where his hand was. It seemed to be resting on the wall to its side, as if he was standing up normally, just putting his palm and fingers against the wall. How was that even possible? How was he not falling? He was sticky, but not that sicky, right? Peter looked at his hand for a moment, confused, looking for a rational explanation. Would he be able to let go if he wanted to? He decided to try it out. He was intrigued by what was happening. Peter moved from standing on his heels to standing up normally. He then focused on his hand, looking intensely at it, as if it was going to intimidate it into letting go. He did that for a few seconds, repeating in his head what would succeeding looked like. Then, when he felt convinced that it was going to happen that way, Peter moved his hand away from the wall, going as slowly as humanly possible and holding his breath. As soon as his hand left the wall completely, he gasped for air, shocked it worked.
Peter inspected his hand for a bit, as he did multiple times before that day, every time he got stuck to something. There was still nothing wrong with it. At least, nothing visible. Peter’s mind was getting a bit clouded again, but he really wanted to finally understand what was happening. He tried his best to stick his hand back on the wall, but higher. Once that the hand looked stuck, he slowly shifted his weight back onto his heels. The young man did not fall back, as apparently, his hand was now again enough to support his weight.
“Wow…”
He looked at his free hand in pure awe, then back at the wall again. He put it next to the other one, not being able to reach higher than that. Peter wondered if his feet could do the same, as not only his hands were being sticky when he got stuck to his comforter. After double and triple checking that his hands were indeed holding him, he did his best to remove his socks without letting go of the wall, using his feet. Once that was done, he slowly placed the tip of his left foot on the wall. Peter tried to put some weight on it. Well, it seemed to be as steady as his hands… but there was only one way to find out. It took a moment for Peter to gather the courage, preparing mentally to fall backward like an idiot. At least nobody would see it, as Eri went to another room, probably Peter’s bedroom, to leave him some space. After a few moments, he took his foot off the ground. He hurried to put it against the wall, worried that his other grips were not strong enough.
There he was, both hands and feet on the wall, a few centimetres off the ground. It was a really strange feeling, being aware of gravity pulling him down but not actually resting on anything. Peter was only touching the wall, it did not make any sense for him to stay up like that. Even if his skin was sticky, it could not be sticky enough to support his body’s weight, but there he was. Whatever was happening, he was not going to stop there. Peter started climbing the wall. He started going slowly, moving centimetre by centimetre towards the ceiling, still unsure of how this was supposed to be done, if it was supposed to be done at all. He quickly got more confident and accelerated his pace, which meant he arrived at the ceiling within a few seconds. What now? Could Peter also crawl on the ceiling, or would that be pushing his sticky fingers too far? Well, he had to try, he did not get to the top of the wall for nothing, might as well laugh at gravity entirely. Yeah, let’s stick it to Isaac Newton, cause he definitely deserved that and the world should not be thankful for him at all. True, it was not actually going against gravity, as the boy could clearly feel the force of its own weight pushing him down, and the tension in his fingers and feet, so it was something else. However, if one ended up crawling on the ceiling while barely touching it, one could reasonably be making fun of gravity and how weak it seemed now.
So, it was decided, Peter would keep going. He slowly reached for the ceiling with his left hand. It stuck. The fact that was what was expected to happen still seemed crazy to him. The same process was done with the right hand. He was now in a weird position, half of him ready to crawl on the ceiling, the other half still towards the wall. Time to move the feet. Peter tried his best to carefully repeat the same process with his feet. He would like to avoid, if possible, falling on his back again. He did not want to end up with back problems at a young age. Well, more back problems than he already had at least. His back was not great to start with if we were completely honest. Still, not a reason to fall on it though. Sure enough, Peter found himself stuck to the ceiling. He started advancing towards the middle of the room, carefully avoiding stepping on the lights put inside of the ceiling. As he was about to reach the middle of the room, someone spoke.
“Peter, may I ask you why you are on the ceiling?”
Peter jumped, as his heart definitely missed a beat. Unfortunately, jumping while being stuck to the ceiling is not the same as jumping when on the ground. Gravity would normally push you back to where you started, but it could not do that when you were upside-down. Instead, it makes you fall like a brick, and of course, on your back. As Peter fell, he let out a scream and then a painful groan as he landed very ungracefully. That was probably Sir Newton having his payback. He stayed lying on his back, cursing him. Soon enough, Eri was in his field of vision, towering above him, as she was waiting for an answer.
“Well…” He started.
How was he even going to answer that? He had no idea how what he just did was even possible.
“I got stuck to something again… but this time it was the wall. So of course, I tried to get unglued to it, but I ended up being glued to the ceiling instead.” Peter tried to explain.
Yeah… Eri was about to call his parents to get him to go to a hospital or something. Well, he should probably go to a hospital, if he stopped being an idiot for a second, but he did not want to. Something had clearly happened to him at the research centre, and what if by going to the hospital he ended up snitching on himself? What if words of what was happening to him came out and the people at the research centre heard about it? That sounded like something he really wanted to avoid.
“But I am fine Eri. I promise. If I feel very sick again, I will go to a hospital, but first I want to try to figure out what is happening. I need to figure it out before they possibly hear about it. I will figure it out, okay? Just trust me. You know I’m not a total idiot; I’m not going to let myself die.”
That last part was debatable, but the robot did not need to know that or get confirmation about that. There was a moment of silence. Once again, Peter could feel his robot’s glare on him, even if she had no face and so no actual proper eyes to stare with, just a small camera you could barely see. He did not know how, but he did a really good job giving her the ability to have vibes, somehow.
“I will then monitor you very closely.” Eri finally replied.
“Works for me, you can take my vitals and everything as much as you want!”
Just like that, a deal was struck between the two. Hopefully it will work out. For now, Peter needed to catch up on homework and then had some investigating to do.
Chapter 8: Partners
Notes:
Hi,
As explained in the previous chapter’s notes, I am changing the release schedule. Chapter 9 will be posted on the 21st of April (so in two weeks), chapter 10 will be posted on the 28th of April (a week after chapter 9) and so on. This is to leave me a bit more time to write, as I am quite busy right now (I still am writing/working on chapter 14, it has gotten so big that I will have to either re-work it or split it into two chapters somehow). In the meantime, please do feel free to let me know what you think!
Chapter Text
Peter spent the rest of the weekend mostly recovering. He still managed to study a bit, to avoid falling behind on his work. He already had so much to do. It felt like the academic year had started months ago, when in fact they were only one month in. Peter could not wait for the Christmas holidays, but they were still in quite a while. At least, he seemed to get better; his hands were not sticking to anything by accident, and he had not felt the urge to throw up anymore. However, he was still feeling that state of hyper-awareness, and the USB key had not magically turned up. If Peter had not been so exhausted, he would have probably not been able to sleep because of it. He took an enormous risk and now had side effects because of it, but he still had absolutely no proof. At least, he knew more about what was happening. That was something, right?
His sleep felt heavy, in a weird way, as if he had never needed sleep so badly before, as if he could have slept forever. However, Peter’s alarm woke him up, making him quite literally jump from his bed. It felt like being woken up in the middle of the night by a fire alarm. He had experienced that before, thanks, dad. The noise was bumping all around his head, sending his brain danger signals. Peter looked around him, panicked, forgetting for a second where he was, only knowing this was neither at the Stark Tower nor the Malibu villa. After a few seconds, he started to calm down. The noise was not so loud anymore, and his surroundings became familiar again. He was safe, in his bedroom at MIT. As Peter went to stop his alarm, reaching for his phone, he realised his arm was shaking. Being woken up so suddenly really did a number on him. After taking a few deep breaths, Peter finally felt his adrenaline decrease, becoming entirely calm once again.
Peter got ready as he usually did. Nothing weird happened, so that was good. He also felt much better than the previous day. Hopefully, his troubles with his alarm were simply due to anxiety, and whatever was wrong with him was over. On that wishful thinking, the young man left his flat, wearing a big jacket and a warm jumper. Harry wanted to meet before class and, for some reason, wanted to hang out on the grass in front of the building where they had their first class of the day. Of course, Peter had protested, not being a big fan of the cold. Also, would not it have been better for someone who had been supposedly sick to stay warm? And thus, meet inside? Well, to that perfectly valid point, Harry had replied that the fresh hair would do him some good and that they would not stay outside for too long. Right, at least they would have to leave to get to their class on time, so that was at least some kind of guarantee it would not last an eternity.
As soon as Peter stepped outside, he felt like he had received a big old slap to the face. The cold air was not playing around this morning. It made him miss his Malibu villa even more. He tried to repress a shiver or two and made his way to where they were supposed to meet. After walking for a couple of minutes, Peter could already see Harry sitting in the grass, somehow enjoying the little bit of sun they had. What a weird guy. When Harry saw him, a smile formed on his face and he started waving enthusiastically. Peter hurried up to him.
“I still think meeting inside would have been a better idea.” He said before sitting down next to his friend.
“Oh, come on.” Harry laughed. “It will be good for you to get some fresh oxygen to your brain after being stuck in your flat feeling bad all weekend.”
Peter still disagreed with him but chose to not say anything, as it seemed he was not going to be able to change his classmate’s mind on the subject.
“Anyway, I have something for you that will make you forgive me for forcing you to be in the cold for a bit.” Harry said while reaching into his bag.
Well, now Peter was interested, leaning forward to try to see what Harry was grabbing. Finally, a thermostat was revealed.
“You made me soup again?” He asked, surprised he was being so kind again.
Harry nodded before handing him out the soup.
“Yes, you told me how much you liked it, and it is easy to make, so I thought why not? It is actually quite appropriate for your situation as, you know, my mother used to make it for me when I got sick so… Hopefully it will help you too!”
Harry had a bitter-sweet smile, revealing some pain he had about his mother. Peter tried to think if he had heard anything about Mrs Osborn in the media before, but could not remember anything. Still, based on his friend’s expression, it was safe to assume she was somehow not around anymore, or something had happened that badly damaged their relationship. Peter took the soup and tried to offer his most comforting smile, but it probably looked like an awkward one.
“I am sure it will. Thank you very much.”
Peter carefully put the thermos in his backpack. He was going to have a great dinner tonight. When he looked at Harry again, he was now half-laying in the grass, using his forearms and elbow to not completely lie down. He looked so peaceful with his eyes closed. Harry’s hair was moving a bit due to the wind, but whatever product he had put in his hair was still doing its job, keeping his unruly looking, but in reality neat, hairstyle mostly intact. The guy was strange, full of contradictions, or so it seemed. He looked like a reserved and distant person, but was actually very self-assured and quite sociable, having what one could call a fun and light personality… He seemed such a happy person, being able to simply go talk to people and become friends with them with such ease, never having to fear loneliness, which was the opposite of Peter. However, Harry seemed to have quite his fair share of pain inside. There was the obviously complicated relationship he had with his father, that the boys had talked about, but there was more. Peter could not help to think back to when he had been mean to him, snapping at him for being too friendly, and then the expression he had had just now when mentioning his mother. Something was telling Peter that his friend was not as joyful as he let on.
Or perhaps Peter was thinking about all of this too much. He did tend to overthink things, and he was way better at analysing robots than humans. He better back off before inventing Harry a backstory disconnected from the truth with all his conjectures. Anyway, he needed to stop staring at his friend before he realised, as that would make things awkward. Peter decided to imitate Harry, resting his back using his arms. He looked at the sky for a bit. The sun was indeed out, but its heat could barely be felt against his skin, or at least compared to what Peter was used to. He still tried to enjoy it, along with the fresh air. He would still rather be inside though, if he was completely honest. He tried to relax, but all the movement around him of people walking by was not helping either. It made him feel a bit on edge for some reason. After a few moments of forcing his brain to block the other people as much as he could and as he was about to finally start to relax, Peter jumped a bit. There was something in his hair. He looked up immediately to see what looked like an arm.
“You have blond roots… Do you dye for hair?”
Peter looked towards the voice. It was Harry seemingly inspecting his hair. Huh. That was… unexpected but… not completely shocking. Peter blushed quite a bit as he felt his friend’s fingers going through his hair, inspecting his roots. That felt quite weird… like he wanted him to stop and keep going at the same time.
“Yes… I have been meaning to dye it again, but I have not had the time to look for a salon yet.” He replied, trying to look natural.
Harry seemed to notice something was off as he looked at Peter and his hand stopped wandering through the hair.
“You look uncomfortable. Sorry, I did not mean to invade your personal space.” He apologised.
Peter tried to not blush even more, his face feeling quite red for some reason.
“It’s fine, I’m just… not the biggest fan of people touching my hair.”
Harry gave him a sympathetic smile.
“I would offer you to help you dye it, but it is probably best to leave that job for a professional.”
Peter had a small laugh.
“For a while, at the start, my mother was the one dying it. We’d make a self-care day out of it. We would spend it together, mother and son, and pamper ourselves all day while relaxing. Then she got a bit too busy at work, so I had to go to a salon when she did not have time to do it properly.” He explained.
“Well, that sounds like a very nice tradition. I could use a self-care day for sure.” Harry laughed a bit.
Peter hesitated for a second, not sure if he should respond, just awkwardly laugh, or offer to have one with him. It was that slightly embarrassing thing he loved doing with his mother, it would probably be weird to offer having one with Harry. As if he was reading Peter’s mind with his piercing blue eyes, Harry looked straight into his eyes and said:
“We should have one. You can teach me what to do during a self-care day and I can dye your hair in exchange. I swear, I will do my best.”
Once again, Peter wanted to blush. His friend was quite good at making him blush somehow. God, that was really annoying.
“Uh…” Peter started, not knowing what to answer. “Sure, I guess…”
He did not have time to say more as someone cut him off.
“Harry. Peter. I am glad to see you two young men are enjoying some fresh air. That does wonders for the brain. Hopefully, that will help you to stay awake during your first class of the day.”
Peter quickly turned towards the voice, seemingly embarrassed to be seen like that for some reason. He straightened up, sitting now properly and wiping possible dirt from his arms.
“Doctor Octavius…!” He said for no real reason, just surprised to see him, even though it was nearly time for his class.
“It was my idea, Doctor.” Harry explained. “Peter was feeling a bit under the weather this weekend, so I thought this was exactly what he needed to start the week right.”
“That seems indeed like a good idea.” The professor softly smiled. “Hopefully, it will help him.”
It seemed like the two men had talked to before, well, at least enough for Octavius to know Harry’s name. That reminded Peter of how he had bled on that poor professor’s car seat. He should have given him something to get them repaired, but the man would have probably refused. He did seem to truly care about his students.
“Are you two going to partner up together for the project?” The doctor asked.
Harry shot Peter a look. He had asked him to be his partner for the project the first time they met. Peter had carefully, but not so subtly, avoided giving a real answer by saying that they had time to figure this out. They strangely had never talked about it again.
“Yes, we are. We have not started thinking about what we are going to do yet, though.” Peter answered.
Working with Harry was now the obvious choice. What else was he going to do? Ignore the only friend he had made so far and wait to be partnered up with someone at random? He would rather not do that, for multiple reasons. Peter quickly glanced at his friend, who seemed somewhat relieved, before looking again at his professor. Doctor Octavius seemed pleased, as if it was the outcome he was hoping for too.
“Well, I am excited to see what you are going to accomplish together. I am sure I won’t be disappointed.”
Yeah, no pressure. That did not just give Peter a wave of anxiety, knowing he had apparently set for himself and his partner high expectations without meaning to.
“On that note, I will see the both of you in a few minutes. Don’t be late.”
Harry and Peter said goodbye for now to their professor. Peter was unsure of what to do now. They were going to have to go inside soon, should he start getting up, or did Harry want to enjoy what little sun they had a bit longer? That felt like an awkward thing to ask… but it was better than sitting there, not knowing what do to. As he was about to ask, Harry came up with his own question:
“So… We are partners, huh?”
Well, it was not really a question but more a remark. Peter was not sure of what he wanted to achieve with it, though. He was probably asking if they were now friends, after that Peter had told him they were not. That was his opportunity to make it up to him by telling him, yes, they were now friends. That would make everyone happy, and it was the normal thing to do. Peter gave Harry a quick look. He seemed amused, but there was also some undertone of something else that Peter could not put his finger on. Peter stopped looking at him, to instead focus intently on some random patch of grass in front of him.
“It makes more sense than to not be.” He replied.
“Right.”
Not Peter’s finest moment, not answering the question like a normal human being. He did not even know why he could not have done that. It just felt so… cheesy and unnatural. He tried to think of what to say to avoid again the awkward silence. It was not like they had the time to start an interesting conversation, as they were going to have to leave in a minute or two.
“Well, anyway, I-“ Started Harry.
Suddenly, Peter had this arm raised, with his hand nearly against his friend’s face. He furrowed his eyebrows. Why did he do that? He looked towards his hand. There was something in it. Was that… a skateboard?
“Holy crap… Peter, damn, you…” Tried to muster Harry, but not managing to form a coherent sentence.
He lowered his arm, very confused about how he had ended up holding the tip of a skateboard. Someone came running towards them.
“Oh my god, I am so sorry! I must have hit some rock, and the skateboard just flew from under me. I am so glad it did not hit you in the face!”
It was a young man, around their age. He was probably a student here too, and the owner of the skateboard. Still confused, Peter handed him the skateboard.
“It’s fine.” Harry brushed away the stranger’s concerns. “Peter, is your hand okay? This must have hurt so much! I do not even know how you managed to stop that so cleanly and quickly!”
Peter looked at his hand. It was indeed quite bruised from all the force it had taken at once when stopping the flying skateboard. It did not look too bad, however. He tried to close his hand. He winced a bit to the pain, but it did not seem like it hurt enough to be too concerned about it.
“It’s fine. I’ll probably have some kind of bruise, but at least you still have your teeth. I’m just glad I caught it.” He replied.
He gave an awkward smile to the owner of the skateboard, to tell him he could go away without feeling guilty.
“Let me take a look at it.” Ordered Harry.
Before letting Peter the chance to object, he delicately took his hand and started to examine it.
“It does not look too bad… You got lucky. You still should go see a medical professional to make sure it is all superficial damage.”
Peter slowly took his hand away from him.
“I will later…” He half-heartedly replied, as he would probably only do so if it kept hurting. “But right now, we are about to be late for class.”
He stood up, minding his poor hand, as Harry let out a sigh.
“You’re right.”
He stood up as well and the two boys headed to class.
Peter did not manage to focus during class. Everything around him was too much; there was too much movement, there was too much noise, there was too much everything. Every time that someone not too far from him would move, he could not help but look, even if they were just grabbing something from their bag or just adjusting their position. He must have looked like a madman while doing so. Seemingly not enough for Harry to say anything. It was also hard for Peter to focus on his professor’s voice, as his brain would focus instead on every little sound he could hear. It was not that they were louder than usual, it was that they somehow did not get filtered out, as if they were as or even more important than the lecture being taught. After a while, the student gave up on the idea of focusing. He will have to ask his friend for his notes, but he was pretty sure he would not mind helping him out. Especially after Peter had been sick during the weekend but still managed to save Harry’s teeth with those incredible reflexes.
Peter had still no idea how he managed to do that. He was anything but known for his quick reflexes, quite on the contrary. He was that kid who had probably lost quite a few brain cells by getting hit in the face by flying balls. Anytime he had tried to play any sport involving one, no matter if it was football or even tennis, he could not avoid getting hit by a ball to save his life. That also meant that one of his biggest fears was playing dodgeball. He had to play it once with his father and his… super-hero friends, as they all had thought it would be a fun bonding activity. That day, he had been convinced it was going to be its last on earth. On the bright side, he got ice cream… for his body and mouth. All of that to say, what Peter had just done, should have not been possible, at least for him. There was also the fact that he managed to stop it so cleanly without hurting himself too much. True, his hand had suffered a bit, but it was still quite impressive as he had been literally millimetres from Harry’s face but did not touch him. Peter could not help but wonder, or rather ask the logical question, was this related to the spider’s bite as well?
Those were quite weird symptoms, sticking to surfaces, hypervigilance, very good reflexes, and at least better than before strength. The student did not know much about spiders, but those symptoms did not seem like the ones you would expect from some weird experiment with a spider. Well… spiders were indeed strong and… sticky in a way, but that was still weird. When he thought about spiders he did not think about reflexes or hypervigilance. True, they could spot things using vibrations in their webs… but Peter was not using vibrations when noticing everything? At least, he did not think he was? In any case, he was going to have to do some research to try to understand what he saw at the lab, so that might also help him to understand what was happening to him. As long as he was not producing some kind of web, he would hold off on the crazy idea that some spider gave him those symptoms as superpowers. He might be living in a world full of superheroes, but things still followed scientific rules. Getting powers after being bitten by a spider was pushing it.
Speaking of the lab… Peter looked at Harry. He did not really know how to feel about him, whether he should be wary of him or not. On one hand, Peter wanted to refuse to believe he knew what was actually going on, there was no way, on the other… he did not know him that much. Both options were fully possible. How to tell which one seemed to be the case? He could not really stalk him at work. He could try pressing him on the matter… otherwise what else? Trying to see if he had any documents at his flat? Seemed unlikely and difficult to do so. Peter had his work cut off for him, with university work, trying to figure out what was happening to him, figuring out if Harry was an ally or an enemy, and figuring out how to get the laboratory shut down. As the student was about to think about that last part, he felt something touching his shoulder. He jumped.
“Peter, the class is over.”
Peter looked towards his shoulder. It was someone’s hand. Right, it was Harry’s. Peter shifted, feeling slightly uncomfortable, still unsure about his friend. Harry removed his hand.
“Sorry, I called your name a couple of times, but you were… completely zoning out. You went from having crazy reflexes to being not even there… Are you okay?” he asked.
Peter nodded as he quickly gathered his things.
“Yeah… sorry, I must still be a bit sick. Could you send me your notes, please? I really could not focus for some reason.”
Harry softly smiled.
“I was already planning to do so as you were clearly not taking any notes; you were just staring into space.” He replied.
Peter frowned. Staring into space? What was he talking about, he was looking everywhere around him, towards every little sound… he had literally not managed to focus for a single second during the class. He hesitated, really confused at what was happening. He then looked at his friend, trying to hide his worry.
“Was I… really completely zoning out?” Peter asked.
“Yes, you were completely in your own world. Peter…” Harry looked at him with concern and seemed like he was trying to find the right words. “You should probably go see a doctor if you are still feeling unwell.”
Peter tried his best to fake a reassuring smile, telling himself that seeing a doctor would probably make him get locked up in a hospital.
“It was probably because of how strangely I slept last night, I will rest a bit more and it will be fine, okay?”
This made it seem like he was implying he was lacking sleep, when in fact he had slept like a rock. Oh well, it was open to interpretation. Harry did not seem that convinced but chose to not press the matter any further as they went to their next class.
Chapter 9: Peter: 0, Book: 1
Notes:
Hi,
I posted a little bonus last week. It is Tony’s POV a few months after Peter was adopted and he had trouble bonding with him. I had written it a while ago and I thought that I might as well post it since I was not posting a new chapter that week. Anyway, if you are interested, you can click on “Next work” on the second line before the fic’s title and it will take you there.
Chapter 10 will be posted next Sunday (it is one that I quite like!).
Chapter Text
As soon as Peter got home, he let himself fall on his couch. It was not the most comfortable couch, but god damn it, Peter loved it as of right now. The fabric was like a soft stroke against his cheek. Was that cotton? Maybe, the boy had never been particularly knowledgeable when it came to fabrics. In any case, he loved his couch, no matter the fabric. As he lay there, enjoying a bit of rest, a busing sound made itself heard.
“How was your day, Peter?”
“It was fine… Just a normal day.” He answered.
“Your parents have informed me that Santa Claus wishes to know what the goodest boy desires this year?”
Peter raised an eyebrow. He was not surprised by them calling him the “goodest boy”, he had had to suffer through a lot of corny and cringey nicknames. He tried telling them to stop, but his smiling and blushing while doing so had quite the opposite effect. Now, from time to time, they would talk to him as one would do to a very cute dog. Well, at least he was cute according to one specie standard. No, what was surprising was that they were already asking.
“Santa Claus? We are barely a week into October!” Peter objected as he finally stopped hugging the couch to look at Eri, who was a bit too close to him for his taste.
She looked at him, still expecting a reply to her question, as if she did not see the issue either.
“Tell them I don’t know yet, that I will let them know closer to December.”
That seemed to satisfy the robot as she stopped staring at him and was now leaving Peter some space.
“Wait.”
He would like to see Uncle Bruce for Christmas. It would be unfair to ask him to take some time off to spend it with the rest of the Stark family, but he could still spare a day off, he did not work all week, only six days a week.
“I would like to go visit Uncle Bruce during his day off if he does not manage to get time off. Just for the day so I don’t bother him too much.”
“I will let Santa Claus know.” Eri replied without missing a beat.
Peter had tried to explain to her the fact that she did not have to go along with pretending Santa Claus was not real, that Peter had known for a while, but he had now given up on that. Same thing with his parents who would swear up and down that the gifts were all from him. To be fair, that had been more believable than a gigantic teddy bear managing to get through the door of the villa during the night without waking up anyone. Looking back, Peter’s mother must have been so mad about that one, but he had really been living the spoiled kid’s life.
Thinking back to the Christmases he had with his parents and other relatives, Peter finally got up from the couch. He was going to get himself a little snack before studying but instead ended up staring at the wall. All the things he had digitally hung about the shady study centre were still there. He was unsure about what to do with them after he had failed in such a stupid way. He could give up… but not after what he saw, and his parent did not raise no quitter. What would they do? What would Uncle Bruce do? He would… probably do the reasonable and logical thing. He would be calling an anonymous tip about what they were doing. That now seemed the pretty obvious thing to do now. They would not have time to hide all of the animals if there was a surprise inspection, right?
However, Peter needed to be careful. He had to make sure that if for some reason they tried to trace back the call, they would never be able to do that. He could do that, he had to learn quite a lot of programming when creating Eri and he knew how to work well with VPN servers. However, there was nothing better than doing it somewhere random with a burner phone. Then, there was the problem of buying the phone, which had to be done also as untraceable as possible. Peter was probably being paranoid, but after getting beaten up saving a random girl and seeing what they were doing to those poor animals, he was a bit scared about what they might do to get back to someone trying to get them shut down. It was better to be safe than sorry. Peter started trying to come up with the best way to be as untraceable as possible. He had to think about every possible way they could overcome the obstacles he was throwing at them, but he could not help to think about that poor girl. He glanced at the not-so-great description he made of her to Eri. She had, unsurprisingly, found a lot of possible matches. How strange that many young Caucasian blond girls with blue eyes and a small face were going to MIT. Who would have thought? Yes, STEM was still a mainly male-dominated field, but it did not mean that there were not more girls than Peter could look at. He would have to keep going through the list of pictures, but not right now. He needed to first make that anonymous phone call. Well, no, actually, he needed to study first. Playing detective and whistle-blower was quite thrilling, but he was a student. His studies should be his priority. On that note, he walked to his desk, dragging his feet along the way.
Once again, Peter had trouble focusing. He could not shake that feeling that he needed to be aware of absolutely everything around him, as if he was going to be attacked at any moment. Luckily, or not, that seemed to take so much energy that at least he would still be able to sleep. This had been proven the previous night when he had slept like a rock. He was very grateful that his symptoms did not prevent him from sleeping. Indeed, Peter had once gone for a few days with little to no sleep, and he had definitely not handled it as well as his father would. That man must actually have a hidden superpower, not needing sleep or something. However, Peter could not feel too happy about his symptoms not being too much of a pain as his arms now felt so itchy. Not the annoying mosquito kind of way, no, that would have been too normal for Peter. Instead, it was the “I feel something like bubbles inside of my arm and it is kind of freaking me out but also very annoying” type of itching. Yes, that was far less common and quite more concerning. Peter was starting to think it might indeed be a good idea to go see a doctor, even if his gut was yelling he would get locked up in a lab if he did go. Add paranoia to the list of symptoms, because that just goes so well with hyper-vigilance and sticking to walls, right?
That decision was probably going to wait after the anonymous call, but after soup time for sure. Peter was indeed about to eat dinner, with on the menu the soup Harry had made him. Just the idea of eating it somehow made Peter feel warm and… happy? It was nice, having someone make you soup. Peter probably should try to thank his friend by making him something too, but not food, he was not great at cooking. Thinking about what to make to show his gratitude, he moved from his bedroom to his kitchen. He thought about it as he opened his fridge. It was a bit too empty, only some yogurts, butter, and what to make a couple of sandwiches were left. He should probably go get groceries soon. After grabbing it, he poured the contents of the thermostat into a big bowl and put it in the microwave. As Peter waited for it to heat up, staring at the microwave, he asked himself if he could make Harry some kind of robot. It would be a small one, not one that would take a lot of space or months to make. Would it be weird to gift him a robot? Probably… and what would do the robot? Yeah, he had no good idea about that.
As the microwaved beeped, Peter had an idea. He could make some kind of interactive projector that would display stars and galaxies, partly from actual pictures and partly from simulations. Harry would be able to wander the universe by just looking at his ceiling. That would be so cool! Well, would he actually like it? Was he even into that type of thing? Too lost in his thoughts, Peter grabbed the bowl instinctively and removed it from the microwave. It somehow took a few instants for his brain to register that the bowl was too hot to be handled directly. Letting a scream that was half surprise and half pain, Peter let go of the bowl. This time, he realised quickly what he had just done and suddenly the bowl was not falling anymore, but back in his hands. Peter did his best to power through the pain and quickly put it down on his kitchen counter. He then turned around to see how much he had dropped. By some miracle, not too much of the soup had found its way to the floor. He quickly cleaned that, before it finally hit him.
“Wait…”
He had not been fast enough to move his arms to catch the bowl. He did not think he had even moved. So, how did he end up holding it again? Peter looked up towards the counter, still crouched to make sure he had cleaned everything. Well, he had to have moved; he was sticking to stuff, yes, but when he was touching them. The bowl had clearly left his hands, so no sticking there. Could he have moved so quickly that he had not realised it? That seemed crazy… But was it crazier than everything already happening to him? He slowly stood up again and approached the bowl of soup, as if it might jump on him. Braving his fears of a soup attack, Peter took a closer look at the bowl. There was some white gooey stuff on it. It was at two different places, directly across from each other. It looked really gross. Not wanting to touch it for obvious reasons, but needing to investigate what was on his bowl, Peter hurried to grab a pen. He ran to his room and looked around. He was not lacking pens, quite the opposite, but it was a tough decision to pick which one to sacrifice to the white goo. Finally, the student picked a light green pen that had come with a bunch of other pens. He always found that colour quite useless when writing notes: why use both a dark green and a light green in his colour scheme for his notes? That seemed like the best way to mess up your scheme and then have to redo everything. Anyway, that pen would finally be used for something at least, even if it was to investigate something gross. When he came back, he saw that the white thing had started to look a bit more solid. Was it drying or something? He pocked it with the tip of the pen. It felt bouncy. He tried to apply some more pressure, but the pen would only bounce and not go through it. That was weird. He tried to scoop it from the bowl somehow. Nope, it did not want to leave the bowl. Huh, Peter should have taken a microscope with him to MIT.
Peter tried to think about what exactly had happened right before the white goo appeared. He stood where he had moments before. He had been holding the bowl which did not have anything on it, or at least nothing he had seen. He decided to just assume he would have noticed the white goo when picking his piece of dishware out of the cupboard. Peter had just taken the bowl out of the microwave when he noticed it. Maybe something happened in there? He quickly checked it, but it looked completely fine. Nothing to suggest it came from that. He then tried to remember what happened when he realised that the bowl was too hot. Peter had let go of it. He did remember the heat against his palms disappearing, so that must have happened, but then it had been back in his hands? He could try to gaslight himself, that he did not let go of the bowl, but some of the soup had been in fact spilled. Yes, it could have been spilled while wrestling with the soup, but it did not match what he would expect then. The logical assumption then was that the two weird things were connected: the goo and the bowl reappearing in his hands. Was this a “glitch in the matrix” type of thing? With all the weird things happening to him, he had the feeling he should not let himself just go into denial mode and pretend it was just one of those weird moments that nobody could really explain.
Peter closed his eyes, trying to remember if he had done anything that could have somehow created the white goo. He focused on when he realised that the bowl was falling with Harry’s precious soup inside. Of course, he had wanted to grab the bowl before it hit the floor. However, the boy had not been fast enough, he had not leaned over or squatted. He had however moved his arms in some way. Had he reached for the bowl? Maybe, but it had been so quick… He tried to mimic what had happened, hoping it would jolt somehow his memory, or something to that effect would happen. He tried to grab the falling bowl again. He felt something happened to his arms. They did not move, but it felt like, something moved in his wrist area? It was like a flush of blood, like when you are upside down and you can feel all of your blood coming up to your head, but at a much greater speed, and then it just stopped.
Peter opened his eyes and thought that he had the proof he needed to get himself checked into a mental hospital. There was white sticky goo on the floor, a few meters in front of him. Did that thing just leave his body?! That was gross, that was way too gross. He must be losing his mind. He… checked himself for any trace of the goo. Nothing. Well, at least it could have been even more gross. Peter looked at his wrists. If it did come out of him, it felt like it was coming out of there. While walking to the living room to get his tools to poke around, Peter tried to replicate the movement that had released the substance. After a few tries, something shot out of his right wrist at an impressive speed. It made its way to a book on his coffee table. This time, it was not just a patch of goo, it was a white thread still connected to his wrist. It was quite thin, unlike the deformed patch he had seen before.
He stayed still, too stunned to do anything. Could he move his arm or was that dangerous? He decided to avoid moving it and instead leaned over to look at his wrist. It was indeed coming out of his body, no doubt about that. It looked somehow familiar, but it was the wrong size. Then, it hit him. Of course, it was familiar. Of course, that was what was coming out of him. He was making webs. No more denying that the spider bite had somehow been causing all of his strange symptoms. It seemed like the spider had managed to create a mutation in Peter by biting him. Some of its DNA had either overwritten some of his or somehow added itself. It had given him some of its abilities, such as walking on walls and ceilings, but also the ability to create webs. Maybe Peter had been right in connecting spiders being sensitive to vibration to him sensing movement around him better. The scientists could have somehow enhanced this trait in the spider which then had given him the hypervigilance he had now to deal with. It would still not explain his incredibly fast reflexes. Okay, he could sense things around him better, but he still had to move quite fast. Last he checked, which was probably never, spiders did not have super-speed.
“Uh.”
Peter should have been completely freaked out, calling his father to get the best team of scientists to figure out what was happening to him. Instead, he was curious. If his body had new abilities, what could he do with those? Determined to find out, Peter slowly grabbed the thread. It felt indeed sticky, but he could somehow avoid getting stuck to it. Once his hold got more confident, he decided to pull his hand swiftly towards him, seeing if he could make the book go to him to then grab it. Peter suddenly felt a sharp pain against his forehead before falling backward and hitting the ground with a loud grunt. The book had flown as he hopped, but it had been too quick for him to use his new reflexes. Well, it was still a good start. Peter got back up right away. The thread was still connected to his wrist. It seemed like the next step was to figure out how to somehow cut it, even though he had no idea how to do that. Peter decided to wave his arm like a maniac and hoped it would somehow cut it. It surprisingly did. It was then time for a second try. Determined to get this right, Peter looked around him until he locked his eyes on a TV remote. That was less dangerous than the book, as it was lighter, but it might mean that it would come at him quicker. Oh well, at least Peter would avoid a concussion.
Peter placed his feet some distance from each other and tried to balance his weight. Okay, he was nice and steady. His right arm extended quickly in front of him, and web once again came out of his wrist. The “easy” part, which was a weird way to describe it, was done. Now, it was time for the challenge. The young man took a few deep breaths, as to prepare himself mentally. He then, as he had done just moments before, yanked his arm back towards him. He managed to catch the object this time. Peter smiled, feeling a mixture of pride and amazement. He then shook a bit around his arm to sever the thread. When that was done, Peter repeated the procedure with various objects, picking up the cadence more and more as each object flew across the living room. Soon enough, it looked like spiders just had their first world war in his living room, but now Peter really had movements down.
Okay, Peter could grab objects in a really cool way, but what else? How strong was the web he was making? Peter looked at his ceiling. Did he really want to have to clean web from it, even if he could climb up there? Did he really want to risk breaking something important or expensive? Yeah, Peter should probably stop experimenting inside of his flat. He looked through a window. It was already dark, meaning that most people would already be studying or partying in someone’s flat. Peter quickly took his jacket and made his way outside, completely forgetting about his soup. After walking a bit towards his campus, he found a good spot. It was somehow isolated, so even fewer chances of someone walking up to him, and it had a strong-looking tree. There were still a few lamp posts so he could see, but there was not too much light to make him obvious. It was probably the best spot he could find. After inspecting the tree for a bit, Peter chose a branch that looked steady enough. Once again, he made sure he was steady on the ground, not wanting to fall on his butt in an embarrassing manner and shoot his web upward. It stuck to the branch. He cut it off from his wrist and, using both his hands, he started to lift himself up as best as he could. Peter still struggled, the thread being so thin, even with his new strength and stickiness. That did not matter much, as the goal of this little experiment was to see if it would break under his weight, and he had managed to get his feet off the ground. The thread did not seem to mind the weight.
Peter got back to the ground and looked at the web as best he could in the limited light he had. He really needed to get a microscope. The sturdiness of that thread was amazing. It was quite thicker than regular spider web, but far from the size he would have expected it to need to be to hold his weight. It also did seem to be thicker than the first thread he had produced. Maybe he was somehow getting better at making them? Not being in the mood to stand there and theorise, Peter decided to get to his next experiment, which would be the most fun one yet. He walked a bit away from the tree. As he realised everything that he would be able to do if this worked out, his heart started to beat quite fast, and he felt himself becoming nervous. He had to take a few deep breaths to calm his nerves. Once he was mentally ready and far away, Peter started running, planning on running past the tree. As he got up to it, he jumped as high as he could and shot a web once again upward. Suddenly, he was swinging, in a sort of circular motion. Not being sure if he was going to manage to go around the tree or if he was about to crash into the trunk, he let go of the web. The landing was a bit rough, his feet hitting the ground hard and having to take a couple of steps forward to not fall, but he had managed it okay.
Enjoying the obscurity of the night and the adrenaline rush he got from swinging, Peter made his way to a building that was not too tall. He felt determined to test out his limits. He started climbing it by simply touching the wall with his fingers and feet, completely forgetting to be scared of falling. He arrived at the roof surprisingly fast. After looking around a bit, he saw a couple of tall buildings, in the exact disposition he had wished for. Without thinking, he backed to the opposite end of the roof and then started running as fast as he could. The edge was 50 meters away. That became 20 meters. Then 10. 5… 4, 3, 2, 1… Peter stopped right at the edge of the building, his survival instinct finally kicking in. He had stopped running so suddenly that he had to wave his arm around to not fall forward, off the building edge. What was he doing?! Had he lost his mind?! Yes, he could swing around just fine around a tree, but swinging off buildings? Yeah, he was not doing that. His father and mother would kill him if he tried something so stupid… even if he ended up dying in the process. His father would probably find a way to bring him back to life just so he could kill him himself.
That was enough for tonight. Peter was going to stop playing around like an idiot with his new web-making ability, and instead act as the scientist he was. He came back down in the same way he had climbed up the building, and started to go home, forming a plan in his mind as he walked. The first step was to call an anonymous tip about the research centre. They were clearly breaking laws with the way they were handling those poor animals. They would be shut down for, at the very least, quite a long time, if not for good. Then, he will have to figure out what was happening to him. Peter was going to have to buy everything he needed to track his vital. He would check them regularly and keep track of them. Yes, it would probably be way better to have scans, x-rays, MRIs, the whole work, but what then that would mean to possibly become a lab rat himself. Peter would also have to buy a microscope and a chemist kit to run some tests on the web he was producing. He wanted to learn everything there was to learn about it.
Finally, the last thing on his to-do list was to figure out if Harry knew. That would probably be the hardest part, but Peter needed to know if he still had a friend, or if Harry was actively participating in this horrible machination. Peter had now a busy schedule to say the very least.
Chapter 10: I'd run away and hide with you
Notes:
Hi,
Here is chapter 10, I hope you enjoy it. It used to be my favourite until I got to chapter 14 and 15, which are now my favourites. My friend and beta reader, Yen, also agrees with me on that. Speaking of her, I want to thank her for all her help and encouragement, as she is the one that convinced me to actually start writing the story after I came up with its premise, and then to post it. She also has to suffer through all of my nonsensical rants about Peter and Harry (there are _a lot_ of them, believe me) and answers all of the questions I have for her when I send her a new chapter to give me her thoughts on.
Chapter 11 will be posted in two weeks, on Sunday the 12th of May.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Peter had tried his best to find anything that could be considered suspicious about the biology lab, but without the USB key he had of course lost while being attacked by a spider, it was useless. He could try to go back there, but this idea made him feel sick to his stomach. The images of those poor animals would attack him and his senses would go into overdrive, as if he was suddenly in danger. He was not also too keen on the idea as he still did not fully know what that spider had done to him. Peter was glad to have the excuse to be sick, as that way Harry would assume that him acting weird in general and towards him was just him still not feeling very well. That was not completely false, but definitely not the real reason. After giving up on the idea of finding any actual proof, Peter called in an anonymous tip. It was a strangely straightforward process. That is once he had figured out how the call could not be traced back to him; he did not want those people who had beaten him up to figure out he was still out there being a nuisance. Peter had then just had to call the phone number that was easily accessible online, explain that he suspected the research facility to abuse animals, and that was it, he just hung up after that. Peter had decided to not mention them sending out big arms gorilla after people, as he did not want to see like an obvious madman…even though it was true.
Once the tip called in, Peter focused on keeping track of his vitals. They either did not change much or actually improved and so did his web-making abilities. His webs had become consistently stronger, and so was his ability to stick to things. That was probably thanks to him training in his flat. However, being out in public was still harder than it had been before. All of those noises and movements made him feel dizzy sometimes. It was still as if everything was screaming for him to focus on that specific thing. For now, Peter’s solution was his trusty noise-cancelling headphones, but he knew that he would have to find a better one later, once he had some more peace of mind. Waiting to see if anything was going to happen to the research centre was driving him crazy, but so did the question of Harry’s involvement. He had to figure out if his friend could be trusted or if he was an enemy in disguise. He could try to spy on Harry, but Peter had a sneaky suspicion that he would get quickly noticed and would not actually find anything. Harry seemed too smart and organized for that. The only option seemed to be to catch him off guard to push him to make a mistake, which was what Peter was going to try to do.
As planned, Peter arrived in front of Harry’s building. This time he knew which button to press to ring for his friend, as he had previously shown him which one it was. He had to wait a bit, standing awkwardly, but then the door opened for him. As he went inside, Peter felt a wave of anxiety. How could he even approach the subject? He could not just straight up ask “hey, did you actually know about the messed up experiments on the animals and the fact your employer tried to have a girl beaten up?”. Also, what if the answer to that was yes? That would mean that Harry had no morals, so what would stop him from making the noisy boy that Peter was disappear? Peter felt his stomach becoming one huge knot as he pressed the button to call the lift. The ride upwards felt like an eternity when it must have been less than a minute. Once the door opened, Peter noticed that Harry’s flat’s door was left just a bit open, not enough to actually let someone see the inside of the flat. Harry must have left it that way so that his friend could enter. He stepped into the corridor that led to Harry’s flat and made his way to the door. Peter took a deep breath, trying to shake off his anxiety, before slowly opening it and entering the flat. Harry was sitting on the couch. That would have been not surprising, if it was not for the fact that one, he had his arms wrapped around his legs that were folded against his chest, and two, he seemed to be in pyjamas or in gym clothes. Something was clearly wrong. Peter approached him and Harry did not turn his head towards him, staring at the coffee table instead.
“I am sorry Peter, I completely forgot you were coming over, I…” he started.
“What happened?” Peter cut him off.
Harry finally looked at his friend. His eyes were clearly red as if he had been crying. He looked terrible. That annoying but charming smile was gone, and so was the spark he had in his eyes. Instead of his confidence, it was just sadness. Harry seemed to hesitate, probably debating on what to share or not. Peter waited patiently, not wanting to rush or force him. After a few seconds, Harry finally spoke.
“I… had an argument with my father. The worst one in a very long time, probably the worst one since…”
He did not finish his sentence, staring instead into the emptiness in front of him, but Peter figured out it was better to not press him about it. He slowly sat down next to his friend, completely forgetting why he had first decided to come here.
“I am so sorry… It must have been tough for you.” Peter tried to comfort him.
He was definitely not good at supporting people during rough times, but Harry seemed to appreciate his attempt as he slowly went to rest his head against Peter’s shoulder. This made him blush. He was not used to someone doing that at all, but he did not try to move or avoid it. Harry seemed to be needing it. After a few moments, that he spent debating on what to do, Peter timidly wrapped his arm around his friend’s shoulders, hoping that would give him so more comfort. That seemed to be the case as Harry went to bury his face a bit in his neck. Peter focused on the TV that was turned off right in front of him. He was scared that otherwise his heart would stop beating or he would become so red that he would get stuck that way forever. Physical contact that was not from his close family always flustered him. He was not used to it and was not a big fan of it, but this was something else. His stomach just felt so weird. They stayed like this for a while as Peter kept staring at their reflection on the TV. He could feel Harry’s body moving as he took a breath and then exhaled. He could even feel it against his skin, giving him a tingling sensation. He could also feel his friend’s hair just slightly brushing the back of his neck, sending chills down his spine. This felt way too real and not real at all at the same time. Peter was trying his best to not move an inch, as you would do if a cat was sitting on your lap.
“Thanks Pete.” Harry said.
Peter heard a chuckle coming from Harry. He would have looked at him, but with the head against his neck, that was a bit complicated. He looked at him via their reflection on the TV instead.
“You’re really using this as an opportunity to call me that again?”
“Yep.” Harry proudly answered before letting out a small laugh.
Peter could not help but smile. Harry’s laugh was so heartwarming to hear right now. However, his smile faded a bit when his friend finally decided to straighten up and sit normally, breaking the contact that they had. Peter felt weirdly disappointed.
“I cannot believe you are seeing me like this.” Harry sighed.
Peter turned towards him. Why would Harry say that? He did not care about what his friend looked like right now at all. All he cared about was trying to make him feel at least a bit better. Peter gave him a small smile.
“Come on, you still have more poise and chic than when I go to class!” That made Harry softly smile. “Let me make you a cup of tea, and then we can talk about anything you want.”
Tea always brought comfort to Peter. There was something about holding and drinking something hot. As if it could always warm you up emotionally. Maybe it could, or maybe it was because his mother would always make him tea when he did not feel well and sit with him as they drank it together. In any case, some tea could not hurt right now. Harry softly nodded.
“I would not mind some chamomile tea.”
“That is a good choice.” Peter smiled.
He looked at his friend for a second, not really wanting to leave him sitting alone on the couch, but he had tea to make. So, ready to make the most comforting chamomile tea he could muster, he made his way to the kitchen. It took a bit of time to figure out where everything was, but soon enough, two cups of tea were ready to be drunk. When he came back, Harry gave him a quick smile, clearly still embarrassed to be in his pyjamas. The funny thing was that Peter actually liked seeing him that was. Not sad of course, but raw, rather. It somehow made him feel more human, instead of that perfect guy with the perfect flat. And the perfect smile. It was like when they had talked about their family. Harry had let go of all his charming ways and perfect persona and talked frankly instead. Peter could get used to that.
“Here you go, be careful, it is still hot.” He said while setting down the cups on the coffee table.
Harry leaned forward and touched the sides of the cup with his fingertips as if he wanted to feel the warmth without burning himself. He let his fingers run on the surface like that for quite some time before finally speaking.
“I… talked to my father earlier. We had an argument about…”
Harry stopped moving his fingers as his shoulder tensed up. Peter would have liked to help relax but was not quite sure what to do.
“It does not matter about what.” Harry declared. “The point is that I do not think we will have Christmas together.”
“I am sorry…”
That is all he could think of saying. He could not imagine not spending Christmas with his family. It was supposed to be that time of the year when you spend time with the people you love. It is supposed to be the happiest time of the year. The thought of Harry’s father not wanting to spend Christmas with his own son was breaking Peter’s heart… It was also making him angry. Quite angry.
“It is not as if we have the happiest Christmas celebrations to begin with.” Harry shrugged.
Peter bit his lip. His friend clearly seemed sad about this, even if he was a bit trying to hide it, acting as if it was not that bad. He hated seeing him like this. It was so unfair to him. They only had met back in September, but Peter knew he could not leave his classmate alone for the holidays. He did not deserve that. It would be so unjust for Peter to enjoy a happy and loving family while Harry was in his flat, alone, with nobody to comfort him. Peter shifted, leaning a bit forward to move closer to Harry. He raised his hand to put it on Harry’s shoulder, to give him a comforting touch, but that felt awkward. He put it down and cleared his throat instead.
“You could come with me back to Malibu for winter break. I have to warn you, my family is a bit extra during Christmas time…” The cringey message left to Eri was proof of that. “but they would love to have you. I… I would love to have you there too.”
Harry turned his head, looking at him surprised for a second, before managing to have a more neutral expression on his face. Peter awkwardly smiled at him, which somehow made his friend look away and give his cup of tea his attention again.
“I don’t know Pete… Don’t get me wrong, it is really sweet of you but…” He sighed. “I don’t want to be the odd one out and intrude on your celebration. It is not right.”
Peter felt hurt by this. A bit offended too, if he was completely honest. Harry? Intruding in their celebration? That would not be what would happen.
“Hey! You would not be intruding!” Peter said with a bit too much passion, that made Harry immediately look at him. He took this opportunity to put his hand on his shoulder, as to add weight to his words. “Christmas time is the time when we try to see everybody we care about! That means our big family made up of many people who are probably way too powerful to play competitive games, but that never stops them, and our friends. My uncle Bruce is even going to try to come for Christmas and you would love him. I guarantee you, you guys would get along so well! And my parents would kill me if they learnt I left you all alone during Christmas time. They might come to kidnap you if they find out! I am serious, Harry!”
Harry smiled timidly, and Peter could not lie, it looked good on him. A bit too good even. Peter felt his cheeks getting a bit flushed, but he had to do his best to look normal.
“I forgot that you had a very… interesting family.”
Peter nodded enthusiastically.
“That is the least you can say. But hey, at least holidays are never boring.”
Harry seemed to hesitate a bit and Peter held his breath. He was really hoping he was going to agree to spend the holidays with him. It would be so much more joyful for both of them. True, his father was probably going to embarrass him to death, but it would be worth it… hopefully.
“Okay… I will think about it.” Harry finally replied.
A smile formed on Peter’s face, going from one ear to another, and he had to fight the urge to scream “yes”.
“I said that I was going to think about it, okay? I have not said yes for sure yet!” Harry said.
“I know, I know! But it’s a start, it’s better than directly no!” Peter retorqued.
Harry softly shook his head, smiling, as if he did not want to admit he was happy to see his friend so excited by this idea. That is when Peter realised his hand was still on Harry’s shoulder. He had forgotten to remove it. He slowly did that but felt awkward, so he grabbed his cup and leaned back, resting his back on the couch.
“Now, let’s drink the tea before it gets too cold.” He said.
Harry seemed to get lost in his own thoughts for a couple of seconds but then grabbed his own cup.
They drank and then simply existed next to each other in silence. What Harry seemed to need the most at this time was simply company. Peter was happy to provide that. He always enjoyed doing his own thing while having someone he cared about near him. As a kid, it was playing as either his mother or father was working nearby. He even sometimes liked to quietly observe them, trying to figure out what they were doing, no matter if it was complicated business management or one of his father’s new crazy projects. Then as a teen, he would often study in his mother’s office, as it was much quieter than the workshop. The secretary there would always have some nice hot chocolate or lemonade and cookies waiting for him. She was a nice lady, always acting so impressed by what the boy was studying. He never knew if she actually was, or if she was pretending, wanting him to feel good and smart. In the end, it did not really matter, as it did put a smile on his face.
However, tonight, Peter could not relax and take in the moment. As he was sipping on his tea, he felt torn. He came here to figure out if his only – age-appropriate – friend could be behind cruel experiments on animals, but instead, he invited him to join him on the Christmas holidays. How could he not though, seeing Harry so sad about his father pushing him away… Peter looked at him. Harry seemed also lost in his thoughts, just staring at the coffee table. He looked so vulnerable, so fragile. Peter just wanted to wrap his arms around him and protect him from the world. No, he refused to believe that Harry could know what was really going on in the lab. He truly must have been thinking he was answering theoretical questions about possible research.
“I think I am going to go to bed soon. I feel exhausted and we have a 9am class tomorrow.” Harry said, without breaking his staring contest with the coffee table.
Peter straightened up and looked at his watch. 9pm already. Way too early for Peter’s bedtime, but still an hour or so since he had arrived.
“Yeah, you should probably go rest. I will wash up the cups, don’t worry about it.” He replied as he stood up.
He grabbed the now empty cups and started making his way to the kitchen but stopped. He spun around and looked at Harry. It was like looking at a scared little boy. He was clearly not completely okay yet. Peter observed him for a few seconds, shifting his weight between his feet.
“Do you want me to crash on the couch tonight?”
That was such a weird thing to suggest, why did Peter offer that, he hated sleeping on couches! They were all wrong, messed with your neck and you would never get enough sleep at all. He did not even want to sleep on Harry’s couch, and, needy much? Oh dear, will Harry have to literally ask him to leave?
“I don’t know Pete, I don’t want to make you…”
Harry stopped, as he tried to stop to prevent a sob. Oh. It was maybe the right choice after all.
“I mean, you know, I really don’t mind. It’s late anyway, and you know my track record walking alone in the dark, right?”
Peter tried to force out a laugh, trying to make the situation less serious, but it ended up being more like a computer trying to sing the chorus of Stayin’ Alive by the Bee Gees. Harry took a deep breath that lasted long enough for Peter to shift his weight back from one foot to another then back twice.
“Let me get you some pyjamas then.”
“Sure, thank…”
Peter did not even have time to finish his sentence that Harry had already disappeared into what seemed to be his bedroom.
“you. I guess.”
That was a bit sudden, but considering his friend’s state, he was not going to question it. He simply went to the kitchen to take care of the cups. Luckily, Harry had a dishwasher. Peter still cleaned them a bit before putting them in it, not wanting the tea to stain them if left as is. When he came back to the living room, a set of pyjamas, a pillow, and a blanket were waiting for him. Well, that was quick. Peter changed into them, feeling quite awkward taking off his trousers in the middle of Harry’s flat, and got settled on the couch. It was surprisingly comfortable. He might actually be able to sleep on it without destroying his neck and back. After scrolling thoughtlessly on his phone for a couple of hours, waiting for it to be actually time to sleep, Peter finally called it a night. He fell asleep, comforted by the idea that he was somehow watching out for his friend by staying in the same flat as him for the night.
Notes:
The chapter’s title is from the song “Daddy Issues” by The Neighbourhood, because that is what Harry has :)
Chapter 11: Breakfast at Harry’s
Notes:
Hi,
Here is chapter 11!
I will post chapter 12 next week, on Sunday the 19th of May. Just as a heads-up, chapter 12 is a bit on the longer side.
Chapter Text
“Peter, it’s time to wake up.”
Peter could not figure out who had said that, or rather, he did not care. He was lying on something comfortable with a warm blanket. He did not want to leave that, he just wanted to keep on resting there.
“I have made breakfast and it’s going to get cold if you don’t get up…!”
He did not want breakfast, he wanted sleep. Just let him sleep. He turned around, trying to get away from the person talking. Was it his mother? It sounded too deep for it to be her, so maybe his father instead.
“Come on, we have classes to go to, Peter.”
That is when Peter realised it was not one of his parents. Who was it then? Not Eri either. As Peter finally opened his eyes, he felt a hand softly touch his shoulder, probably still trying to wake him up. He did his best to turn around, still half-asleep, to see who was waking him up. Harry? What… right, Peter had spent the night on his couch.
“Finally! I was scared I was going to have to slap you or something” Harry laughed.
As Peter sat on the couch, he noticed that his friend had seemed to go back to his perfect self. All dressed up, hair perfect, and with a charming smile.
“Sorry… I am not really a morning person.”
Peter went for a good stretch, and that woke him up quite a bit. Exactly what he needed. As he stood up, he noticed he was still wearing Harry’s pyjamas. They were a bit too big for him, but luckily not so big that he might lose his trousers or trip up on them while walking.
“I will let you change and get ready later, breakfast is getting cold.” Harry said.
They headed to the kitchen, where two plates with cutlery were already set on the counter that could also be used as a sort of bar-table.
“I only made eggs, bacon, and some toasted bread. I hope that’s okay, I don’t know what you normally eat.” Harry explained as he sat in front of one of the plates.
“I usually stuff cereals in my mouth until I feel like I might puke and call it a breakfast so I am not going to complain.”
Peter took the other seat and started to eat. The food was still hot, despite the delay he had caused by not wanting to wake up, and quite good. Everything was nicely cooked, he had no complaints. That was definitely a nice breakfast. Or a way nicer one than what he was used to.
“Pete…”
He looked up at Harry and waited for him to keep talking, but he did not, looking at him as if he was waiting for his permission to keep going. Peter stopped eating and asked:
“Yeah?”
Harry looked down to his food, playing with his egg’s yolk using his fork.
“It’s fine if you weren’t, I would not hold it against you, I get it, you were just trying to make me feel better but… were you serious about me spending Christmas with your family? I mean they have never met me, and we have met not so long ago… I just don’t want…”
Peter put down his fork. It somehow hurt to see Harry still so scared he was somehow going to ruin Christmas by joining them during this festive period. Why was he so paranoid about that? Well, his father seemed to not want him home for Christmas, so he was probably to blame, either fully or partially. Peter tried to make his smile as comforting as he could, but he was not the best at trying to smile in general.
“I was serious. We’d love to have you for the holidays. Don’t worry, we always get a surprise guest or two. That is what Christmas is about.”
Harry finally looked up and after a few seconds of just looking at Peter, a small smile appeared on his lips too.
“Okay.” He said before going back to eating as if nothing had happened.
“Can I take this as you officially accepting the invitation?” Peter asked.
As Harry nodded, he felt a wave of happiness. Spending the Christmas holidays with him was going to be great. They were going to be able to hang out without worrying about classes, and just watch movies… and play video games too, maybe. Hopefully. Peter started eating again too, but also tried to think about what video games, board games, and other activities they would do together. He then started to feel a bit nervous. This would be his first time introducing a friend to his parents. They would most definitely be over the moon about it, Peter loved them, and Harry was very well-mannered, so he should had nothing to worry about but… the thought still made him a bit anxious. He could feel his fork getting stuck to his finger. Oh no, not the sticky fingers again. He really had to learn how to deal with them. Luckily for him, it was not really noticeable as he was holding the fork anyway. He kept on eating, pretending as if he did not have the weirdest fingers of all time. By the time he was done with his plate, Peter had stopped worrying about his parents meeting Harry, and the fork had magically stopped sticking to his fingers.
“Let me take care of that.” Harry said as he started tidying up. “You still need to get ready. I have clean towels in the closet in the bathroom. You also have a brand-new toothbrush and a new comb in the cupboard under the sink. You can use my toothpaste. Do you want some clean clothes too? We are not exactly the same size, but I am sure I will find something that will fit you okay.”
Well, Peter was planning on simply wearing his clothes from yesterday, but now he felt weird about it. Would Harry think he was not hygienic enough or something?
“Sure, thanks.” Peter replied.
“It’s the least I can do. The bathroom is the door on the left when you leave the living room.”
Peter got ready for the day, although he felt quite awkward taking a shower at Harry’s place. That was probably because he was not really used to being naked somewhere that was not at home. He showered quickly, so as not to be late and to not have to suffer through the awkwardness for too long. He did enjoy the nice shampoo Harry had. No wonder his hair looked that nice, he was using some high-end shampoo. Everything in the bathroom was neatly organised, with absolutely no mess. Peter would bet practically anything that Harry’s bedroom was the same, with not a single sock on the floor or book out of place. When Peter was done showering, he put on his underwear and quickly wrapped a clean towel around his waist. Right, now he needed some clothes. He peered his head out of the bathroom, looking around.
“Harry?”
“Yes!” a voice not too far away replied. “I am bringing you the clothes.”
Peter was not sure what to do, should he step back into the bathroom, or wait awkwardly with only his head out? Harry arrived soon enough, carrying some nicely folded clothes.
“Right, so I got you some trousers that should fit you okay. My shirts were probably going to not be great, as they are really fitted exactly for me, so I got you a tee shirt instead. I hope that is okay.”
As Harry explained all of this, he just… stepped into the bathroom. Peter awkwardly rushed backward, letting him enter.
“That’s… that’s fine.”
Peter felt his cheeks getting warm all of a sudden and was really glad he had wrapped that tower over his underwear. Here he was, half-naked in front of his friend. Harry did not really seem to realise that, too busy to put down the clothes on the bathroom counter, next to the sink.
“Okay, then, I will let you…”
That’s when he finally turned to Peter, and his brain finally registered the awkwardness of the situation. There was silence, as if Harry’s brain stopped working. He was just staring at Peter, as if he had grown an extra set of arms. Stark knew it was not his face that had a problem, as his friend's gaze pointed below it, so what was the problem? Had he actually grown an extra set of arms?
“Sorry…I… I will let you get dressed.” Harry said, now stumbling on his words.
He ran a hand through his hair and quickly rushed out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him and leaving Peter really confused. What had he done wrong now? Oh well, he had no time to start to overthink about all of their interactions, he had to get ready. The tee shirt and jumper fitted nicely. They were quite comfortable. The trousers were a bit long, but nothing that was too obvious and that would make him look weird. He simply folded their hem and it looked pretty good. Harry had also given him some socks, and they fitted perfectly. Seems like they had more or less the same shoe size. Once he was fully dressed, he quickly combed through his hair, just so it would not be a tangled mess. Peter made sure to tidy up behind him, not wanting to leave his host with a mess, when he had been so welcoming. As he then made his way to the living room, he saw Harry, waiting for him on the couch. He seemed a bit anxious.
“You’re okay?” Peter asked.
“Yeah, yeah, let’s go before we get late.”
Harry gave him a bag with an old laptop in it to take notes in class, and off they went.
Luckily, Harry did not live too far away from campus, allowing them to have a nice stroll. Students and other people were already outside too, rushing to wherever they needed to go. Peter could not blame them for not wanting to take the time to enjoy the fresh air, it was already so cold. He could feel his ears burning from the cold. He was not used to having them uncovered like that, as he nearly always had his headphones on as he was walking outside. Luckily, Harry’s jumper seemed quite warm, allowing him to not freeze. Speaking of Harry, he seemed lost in his thoughts. Peter was a bit worried about him, but at least he seemed to feel better than last night. He probably simply needed some time to process the fight he had with his father. That was understandable. Jeez, he did not even know what the fight was about, but he still wanted to go yell at Harry’s father for making his son so sad.
“I just remembered. You came over last night because you wanted to talk about something. Sorry, I totally messed that up for you. What did you want to talk about?” Harry suddenly asked.
Peter nearly jumped hearing his friend suddenly talking.
“Oh. Right. I…”
What was he supposed to say? That his initial plan was to come to Harry’s flat to accuse him of animal torture? And that he felt too bad for him to do so? Yeah, not the best look. Anyway, it was not as if he still thought that may be the case. Well, it was probably more him refusing to believe that it might be the case, but that did not matter. No point in attacking his friend when he was already hurting.
“It was just about the robotic class. Just talking about how to plan for the next steps.” Peter lied.
Harry seemed to look at him weirdly, which made his stomach feel very weird, as if it was collapsing on itself.
“Okay. We can talk about that after our classes if you want.” He replied.
His voice sounded slightly weird. Peter was not sure why it did, though.
“Sure, that works for me.”
Harry gave him a quick smile as a response and kept heading towards the building in which they had their first class. Peter followed him, as usual.
Classes were a bit tense. Peter was still getting used to all the noise that was now attacking him and all of the movement around him that made him want to jump out of his chair. On top of that, he had now Harry to worry about. Peter was not sure how his friend was feeling after everything that happened. Yes, he was apparently coming over for Christmas break, but he still seemed more guarded than usual. Or it was Peter noticing it more? Harry might have not been hiding it as much. Once classes were done, they did work together on their project, managing to score a table inside a random building, somewhere quiet after buying some quick lunch.
They were going to have to present some sort of prototype to Dr Octavius at the end of the semester. Peter felt both nervous and excited about that. He had not really had the chance to interact with him since the soup incident with Harry, except during classes when answering his questions. However, he could feel him keep an eye on him, looking at him before and after classes, looking at him the most out of all the students during classes. Was it because he was a promising student, or was it because he knew he did not file the police report and suspected him to have not listened to him? Peter did not really want to find out if he was being honest. At least, when they will be showing him their project, he might have a chance to try to gage him more and to win him over again if he had disappointed him. Harry did seem to become more of his usual carefree and charismatic self as they worked together, so that was something. Hopefully, it was because he was feeling better and not because he was putting walls up again.
Once they were done, Peter went back home as he had a mountain of work to do, and so little energy and motivation. He decided to call his parents first so that was out of the way. He did not want to have the thought of having to tell them about their future guest looming over his head for the rest of the day. Telling them went… okay. His mother was of course absolutely delighted, so proud of him for finally making an age-appropriate friend. It seemed like she had given up on that for a while. She had already informed Peter that she would need some information about his friend to make sure the house was ready for him. His father, surprisingly, had been chill about it as well. He had expected him to crack jokes about Harry, asking if he was finally bringing home a boyfriend, but he did not. He had about the same reaction as Peter’s mother: be sweetly happy about meeting a friend of his. It was as if he was trying to reassure and encourage him to indeed bring Harry over. His dad was the king of witty comments and replies. He was nearly never serious, or rather never fully serious. He always had to somehow show that he was a smart-arse, but Peter could not blame him, he himself tended to do that. Even during their sweet moments, he had to crack a joke, as it was for him a way to smooth himself a bit. Peter liked that, it helped to make situations less scary sometimes, or even helped in expressing feelings without so much pressure. However, on rare occasions, when it mattered the most, he knew to cut it out. He would get that Peter really needed his dad, or at least a responsible and mature version. This reassured Peter, he knew he could count on him when it mattered the most.
After that, Peter spent the rest of his day studying, barely making the time to eat some sort of dinner. It was only when he felt like his brain was about to explode that he stopped. It was already late in the evening, so he did not have that much time to relax before going to go to bed. So, logically, he decided to not relax. Instead, he threw himself back into his little investigation. He had still not heard anything back from his anonymous call to the tipline nor had seen anything go down yet. It made sense, they would not just call him back and they were probably getting ready to inspect the lab. Hopefully. As far as his health went, he was surprisingly in quite good health. All of his vitals were completely normal, and the itching had finally settled down. Or he learnt how to ignore it. Sounds and movements were still a bit overwhelming, but he was learning how to deal with that. It felt like all he could do was wait for the tipline people to do their job. Well, Peter could still do something: look for the girl he had gotten beaten up for. She obviously had to know things about what was going on in that lab. Maybe she even had some proof, hence why they went after her. Maybe he could convince her to come forward or work with her to get some proof.
He grabbed his laptop and went to slouch in his bed. As he started to go through the pictures once again, he remembered why he had given up on this. There were simply too many, this was a waste of ti… Peter froze. It was her. He had found her. Somehow, he had found her. Gwendolyne Stacy, a biomedical master student. It felt surreal to look at her picture. He could not believe it had found her. Well, he had found her name, he had yet to physically find her. Well after some online stalking and some… “online stalking”, he managed to find an address for her. It was not too far from the campus, just a bit more into town. However, it was way too late to go see her today. It seemed like he had a new plan for tomorrow evening when hopefully Gwendolyne would be in. In the meantime, Peter was going to try to figure out what to say to her and, you know, sleep.
Chapter 12: Surprise, it’s Spider-Man!
Notes:
Here is the longest chapter I have written so far! It is a quite special chapter for me as I was working on it when I decided to start posting this story (and did so a few days later). It had taken me over a year and a half, nearly two to get to this point, but here I am now working on chapter 21, with over 80k words total (I still cannot believe I reached that). Posting the story here has really motivated me to keep writing, even if it was quite scary at first (it still somewhat is).
Chapter 13 will be posted in two weeks, on Sunday the 2nd of June. I am considering switching back to weekly uploads after that one, but I still need to figure some things out first. As always, I will keep you updated on the schedule, I am sorry if changing the schedule again is annoying. I am trying to balance having a big enough backlog of chapters and the need to share some juicy parts that are coming as soon as possible.Content Warnings
Mentions of animal cruelty and human experiments (nothing graphic).
Panic attack, starting right after “what they would do to him if he got caught” and ends before “He took a few seconds to gather his thoughts”.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
As Peter did not have any classes this particular morning, thank you lecturer for being sick, he was able to get ready without rushing so much, which was nice. If there was one thing he hated about having to wake up early, it was how dreadful breakfast was. He would have to force himself to shove what should be enough food to last him through the morning down his throat even though it was too early to even function, making him want to puke it right back out. As he was slowly getting dressed, he realised he still had Harry’s clothes from the previous day, and that Harry still had his dirty clothes. Knowing him, Harry would probably bring them back cleaned and neatly folded by their next class together. Peter should do the same. He could just put them in his machine that took care of both the cleaning and the drying so they would get ready before class this afternoon. However, as Peter was about to throw the clothes into the machine, he felt some difficulty letting go of the jumper. Something in him did not want to let go of it, as if doing so would hurt him. Well, it was a nice jumper, definitely comfortable, but it was Harry’s, not his. He really wanted to keep it, though. Peter groaned. He hated not knowing exactly why he was feeling a certain way, but that would happen way too often. Why was he having weird feelings about a stupid jumper?! Why did he want so badly to keep it? It had nothing special about it, it was a jumper. In the end, he decided to not throw it in the machine, deciding to use the excuse of “Oh, I forgot to wash it with the rest” to get more time to figure out why he had gotten so attached to a piece of clothing.
Once ready that he was ready for the day, he decided to prepare what he would say to Gwendolyne that evening. He made some bullet points: some about what had happened to him since that night when he got beaten up, and some about why she should come forward or/and help him get some proof. He also made a list of his symptoms; he took his vitals and wrote everything that could help her figure out what was happening to him. She was in the biomedical field, probably working on those weird experiments, so it would be not too crazy to assume she would be able to help him figure out what was happening to him. It would be nice to know if he might get some other unexpected side effects or just… die.
Luckily, there was no time to dwell on whether or not Peter might suddenly die out of nowhere, as it was time for class. It also meant that the time to go see Gwendolyne was approaching. That did not make Peter nervous at all. He grabbed Harry’s clothes, except for the jumper, which he had already folded to the best of his capabilities, and carefully placed them in his backpack, before rushing out of the door. Peter went straight to where he had his first class and, as usual when they shared classes, saved a seat for Harry. He was usually the first one to arrive, being around ten minutes early, while Harry was “only” five minutes early. It did happen occasionally that Harry had to save him instead when it was one of those mornings where Peter had to run to class because his brain decided to not get ready for something like fifteen minutes. Those were fun times.
“Hi.”
Harry sat next to Peter, giving him his usual smile. He seemed back to normal, neither raw from what happened with his father nor weary of his friend for giving him a white lie.
“Hey.” Peter smiled, glad that his friend did not seem suspicious of him anymore.
Harry dropped what was like a small sports bag onto the table.
“Here are the clothes you left at my place. They are clean and everything.”
“I’ve got yours too.”
Peter started removing them from his backpack, but he felt himself tensed up and his stomach knot itself, remembering he had not brought the jumper. He decided to not comment on it for now and handed them to Harry before taking his own clothes from the sports bag to put them in his backpack.
“No jumper?” Harry asked, sounding confused.
Peter, against his better judgment, dared to look at him and he indeed seemed puzzled.
“I must have forgotten to wash it, sorry, I kind of passed out last night.”
Yes, lying to Harry again seemed like such a bright idea, because he had not learnt from his previous attempt at lying. Not only that, it was once again such a terrible lie. Peter was usually not too bad at lying, even though he would definitely avoid lying to his parents. However, Harry either seemed to make him too nervous for that, or he could read him better than most people. He definitely looked amused, with one eyebrow raised. It seemed like Peter should stick to lying by omission when it came to Harry… or he should just tell him the truth. Harry studied him for a second, and once again, he felt his eyes reach into his soul. How did he manage to do that?
“I can bring it back tomorrow…” Peter said.
“It’s fine” Harry cut him off. “You can keep it as damages for having to sleep on my couch.”
They shared a smile, even if Peter was not quite sure what that smile meant.
“Thanks, it is a nice jumper.”
It seemed like that for a second Harry was about to say something, his mouth opening with a smile already forming on his face, but decided not to. Peter was about to ask what he was going to say when the lecturer entered the room, cutting their conversation short. They rushed to put their bags away and get ready for class.
The day went on slowly. Peter felt nervous about going to see the girl from the research lab. He was both dreading it and wanting to get it over with already, so it was quite a push and pull in his head. It, of course, made everything seem so much more intense around him; the smallest movement would activate his flight or fight response and make him tense up. Multiple times, he had to force himself to breathe in deeply and to relax to be able to let go of his keyboard, his fingers sticking to the keys. Then, when Peter got home, he could not help himself but pace around his living room. It was still early enough that Gwendolyne might not be home yet. She probably was, as if he had been the one to nearly get beaten up by people from a shady lab he used to work at he would definitely hide at home for the rest of time. Well, would he? He did get beaten up by those people and here he was, still trying to figure out what they were doing. Peter decided to go already, hoping that the woman would be smarter than him.
Peter did not bring much with him. He had slung his backpack on his shoulder, but that was more a force of habit than anything. Without any books in his bag, and being quite determined to be done with this, Peter walked quite fast, only slowing down to figure out when to turn according to his phone. As he arrived at his destination, a residential building that looked neither fancy nor bad, he realised someone was coming out of it. He rushed to hold the door open behind the person.
“Thanks!” He said casually, trying to appear not too suspicious.
Inside, he checked the mailboxes, wanting to make sure that the woman still lived there. He had gotten her flat number on top of her building’s address, but unfortunately, there was no name on the corresponding mailbox. Not discouraged yet, Peter started climbing stairs, not sure on which floor the flat would be on. As he was reaching the fourth floor, he noticed his stamina was much better than before. He would usually be already out of breath, but here he was, jogging to the next floor. Not all of those side effects were negative apparently. On the 5th floor, he finally found the door with the right number on it. It was time to knock, so let’s just knock, easy peasy lemon squeezy! Yes, but what if this was a bad idea? What if he would put her in danger? What if she would put him in danger? Peter sighed. With everything happening with his body, he did not really have a choice, did he? He needed to talk to her to figure out what was happening to him. Taking a deep breath, he knocked. Nothing. He knocked again, looking around for a doorbell. There were none, so, clearly, he was supposed to knock. Maybe nobody was home? There was however a peephole, so he tried to make himself more visible, in case Gwendolyne was trying to see who it was.
“Hi, I’m Peter, I am looking for Gwendolyne Stacy. I was there when…”
He jumped back. Had he not had those new reflexes, he would have probably lost a tooth or two, as the door swung open.
“Don’t start talking about this outside! Are you crazy?!” A familiar voice said.
Well, he had found Miss Stacy, whose head was now peering from behind the door, looking at him all wide-eyed.
“I am sorry, I…” Peter stumbled, still trying to process the sudden movement of the door.
“Come inside.” Gwendolyne ordered. Finding Peter apparently not fast enough, she then added a “Now!”
Peter rushed inside, a bit disoriented. The woman was looking at him as if he was a ghost, not believing her eyes. He tried to look around for a second, wanting to make sure he was not in some kind of trap. It was a pretty standard living room, much smaller than his or Harry’s, but what you would expect for a university student.
“Oh my god, you really are that guy from that night!”
Peter focused back on Gwendolyne.
“Yeah, I was telling you, I – ”
“How did you find me?! Why are you here?!” She cut him off again.
“I got your address from… It does not matter.” Peter would rather avoid admitting to things he was not supposed to do to someone he did not know. “Listen, I went to the lab, and I – ”
“You did what?!”
Gwendolyne looked at him as if he had grown an extra head. Or two.
“I went to the lab!” He repeated, getting a bit agitated. “I went to the room where they keep the animals!”
The woman took a step back, making a face as if she could not believe what Peter was saying.
“Why would you do that?! No, no, how did you do that?!” In a tone that was as if she was a mother about to unleash hell on her son.
“Oh, jeez, I wonder why I would want to figure out why the bloody hell I got beaten up for?!” He replied, feeling his sassiness coming in as Gwendolyne glared at him. “And it doesn’t matter how I got in!”
Once again, Peter preferred trying to keep the confessions to a minimum.
“What matters is what I saw! All of those poor animals! It’s horrible what they are doing to them.” Peter said
“I know. Why did you think I nearly got beaten up?! I tried to do something about that, look where it got me, I cannot leave my flat without being terrified now!”
Peter softened up a bit hearing that. It was understandable for her to be freaked out to see him. If he could get to her, so could the people from the lab. They had probably been to her building, trying to scare her into silence.
“Right, sorry. Listen, I went to try to figure out what shady things they were doing and get some proof against them.”
She looked at him expectantly.
“So, did you get some?” She asked, getting impatient.
That gave Peter a painful smile. Oh, she was about to murder him.
“Well… I thought I did but…” She stared at him, clearly not amused. “But I lost it.”
“You did what?!” She asked, looking at him once again as if he had multiple heads.
“I did not mean to! I had a USB key with some of their files on it, but I got bit by a spider while I was hiding, so I was probably not 100% thinking straight, so I lost it!”
“Hold on, hold on, hold on…” Gwendolyne said, clearly trying to process what Peter had just told her. “You got bitten by a spider? Was that where we keep all of the test subjects? Did a test subject bite you?!”
She had started looking so serious all of a sudden, not appalled by what Peter was saying, or looking like he was either the dumbest or craziest person she had ever met. That was even scarier.
“I was in that room. I did not really see the spider as I was hiding, but I have been having crazy symptoms ever since, so I think so.”
“What symptoms?”
“Well, things like…”
“No.” Gwendolyne cut him. “Be precise.”
Peter nodded, starting to feel quite anxious now.
“When I came back home after being bitten, I felt really sick. I kept throwing up and I was so weak, I could not move once I was done throwing up. When I woke up the next day, everything from the night before felt blurry, I could not remember what happened and I had this massive headache. The worst one I ever had.” Gwendolyne was looking at him attentively as if she was analysing everything he was saying. “I then remembered what had happened and I started feeling better, physically at least, but then some other weird symptoms appeared.”
He hesitated, knowing how the next part was going to sound. Gwendolyne seemed to pick up on that.
“Go on. What symptoms did you get? I promise I am not going to call you crazy.”
It was as if she knew what he experienced, or rather she was hoping he had experienced those unbelievable symptoms.
“Well… At first, I was really sticky. I mean, my comforter got stuck to me. I had to shower to get it off of me. I would grab things and they would stay stuck against my hand even though I was not holding them. I could even support my weight. I could stop myself from falling just by touching a wall with my fingertips. Later on, I managed to climb to the ceiling! By simply touching it with my hands and feet!”
Gwendolyne simply nodded, clearly wanting him to keep going.
“I also got crazy reflexes. I managed to stop my skateboard right in front of my friend’s face without realising what my body had done. And I stopped it clean. My hand got a bit hurt but not that much. Then, in class, everything was crazy! It was as if my senses were into overdrive.”
He looked at her again, wanting to see her reaction before mentioning the weirdest part: the fact he could shoot webs from his wrists.
“Peter that’s…” Gwendolyne took a deep breath before finishing her sentence. “that’s incredible. All of what you are describing, it is what we were dreaming of, I never thought it was possible, not so soon at least!”
“What did the spider do to me?” Peter asked. “Did it change my DNA or…?
“Not exactly. Well, not directly I guess. By biting you, it transmitted to you what we were using to make it better. It normally enhances things that are already there, but in your case, it did more than that, as you could not stick to things before. I am guessing that whatever they did to that spider made that enhancer evolve into something that caused this. It’s able to transmit traits across species... I don’t think they even realised it can do this yet, as when I left, we were nowhere near experiments involving trying to make it possible for humans to get those enhanced traits.”
“Okay…” Peter took a deep breath.
“You know you are a miracle, right?” Gwendolyne asked.
Peter looked at her. It was so much to process. He could not even process everything that was happening to him before coming to see Gwendolyne, how could he process this?
“There is something else… I can make webs too. Or more like, shoot webs.”
Gwendolyne stayed silent for a second, blinking.
“That… is weird, but at this point, sure, why not.” She took in a deep breath. “Can I see how you are doing that?”
Peter nodded and looked around, trying to figure out where to shoot. He figured out that the floor would probably be the easiest to clean and where he had less chance to damage anything on accident. Peter flicked his hand and wrist, as it was what seemed to work the best to get the web out. Nothing came out. Right, performance anxiety. He tried to not overthink it, to just imagine the web coming out of his wrist like it did multiple times before. It worked out like a charm, and he instinctively rotated his wrist, severing the web from him and instead grabbing it. Gwendolyne moved forward, leaning to try to take a closer look.
“I am going to collect a little bit of it if you don’t mind.”
“Sure, go ahead.” Peter shrugged.
She rushed to another room where she disappeared for a bit, leaving Peter to awkwardly hold his web. After a few moments, she finally came back. She was wearing gloves and had a circular glass container, as well as some sort of scissors. She carefully collected some of the web, allowing Peter to finally let go.
“Quite the miracle indeed…” She whispered to herself.
Gwendolyne went to put away the sample and then stared at Peter, thinking. It was like she was analysing him to figure out what to say next.
“Why did you come to see me, Peter?” She finally asked.
Peter got a bit taken aback by the question. He had not expected it. He had thought the answer was pretty obvious, and he was not sure why she was asking this. She was obviously scheming something.
“To figure out what was happening to me, to make sure I was not dying!”
“And?” She asked, still looking at him expectantly.
He took a second before replying, trying to read her. She definitely knew why he was really here, she just wanted him to say it.
“And because I want to stop them.” Peter answered.
She nodded, confirming that was indeed the answer she was looking for.
“Will you help me?” He asked.
Gwendolyne had a bittersweet smile, before sighing and sitting on her couch.
“I am stuck inside of my flat, having to hide and fear for my life, not being able to finish the research for my thesis.”
Peter went to sit next to her, figuring out that it was what she expected him to do.
“I’ve spent so many years spent on this… I might have to just throw all of my hard work into the trash because I dared to tell them that we should not treat our test subjects like this and that we were far from being ready for human trials.” She looked at Peter. “The night you got beaten up, I had told them I would stop being a part of their unethical research. I had tried hard to rationalize what we were doing by telling myself it was for the greater good, that our research would help so many people, that the end did justify the means… But when they brought up the subject of going to the human phase of trials, and I heard their ideas on how to get test subjects… I realised I just couldn’t do it. Watching those poor animals suffer was already too much, so doing that to humans when we barely started to have good results on animals!”
She shook her head. Her eyes were full of pain and guilt.
“So I told them. I told them that I would not stand for it and that I was going to report them to the university. They, of course, did not take that well. As soon as I said it, I realised that I had to run. I did not have time to grab my computer with all of my work, I had to run right away. I left my backups there, they never let me bring them home.”
“I tried to call in a tip to have them randomly inspected.” Said Peter.
Gwendolyne bitterly smiled.
“They have people in those kinds of organizations, that’s how they can do their messed-up things in peace.”
Well, that attempt felt silly now.
“What do we do then?” He asked.
“The only way to stop them is to expose their research methods publicly. They can pay people in positions of power to turn a blind eye, but they cannot buy out the general public.”
Peter tensed up. He had absolutely no desire to go back in there. What he had seen will probably always be stuck in the back of his mind. Not only that, but his last trip had left him with some mutated DNA, and that was when they seemed to be still in their stage of animal subjects. What if next time they caught him and he would become the test subject?
“You are not saying that we go back in… are you?” He asked in a tone that made his fears apparent.
Gwendolyne seemed to hesitate for a second before suddenly refusing to make eye contact with him and shifting slightly backward, away from him.
“No. I am saying that you go back in.”
Peter blankly stared at her, trying to process what she had just said. His brain finally gave up on that, deciding it was an obvious joke. He let out a laugh that somehow sounded more unnatural than any of the ones he had forced.
“No.”
Gwendolyne scooted forwards on the couch.
“Peter, you have superpowers, you can defend yourself. I cannot.”
“No.”
That was the only thing he could manage to say. She wanted him to back in? Alone? All because he had been foolish enough to try to help her when she had been attacked. He stood up.
“I am sorry but no. You said they wanted to move human subjects. I cannot witness that. I cannot…” He backed up from the couch. “If they do to them what they did to the animals…”
That is when it hit him. The fear he had felt that night, the horror seeing those poor animals, being unable to move as a messed-up spider crawled all over him, what that would look like on humans… what they would do to him if he got caught. He suddenly could not breathe. He kept trying to breathe, to let air into his lungs, but nothing came in. It was as if all the air had disappeared, as if he was in a vacuum.
“Peter? Peter, are you okay?” Gwendolyne said, sounding worried.
Peter kept trying to breathe, but now it felt like something was crushing him, preventing his lungs from expanding. He gripped his jumper, trying to figure out what was causing that pressure, and saw Gwendolyne stand up, catching on that something was wrong. He looked at her, unable to speak as he was desperately trying to breathe, begging for help with his eyes.
“I think you’re having a panic attack, just breathe, okay? Just breathe.”
Peter kept trying, but nothing came in. As she made him sit back down on the couch, he suddenly managed to take in a small breath. He tried to go in for a second one, but nothing came back in again. Gwendolyne was standing over him, analysing him, as if she was calculating how long he had before passing out.
“You need to relax. It is going to be okay. Think about what makes you happy…” she started. “Your family, do you have a good relationship with them?”
Peter nodded. He loved his family. That was what he loved more than anything in the world.
“What do your parents do when you’re scared? Think about how they make you feel safe, how they protect you.”
His mother and father… they would do anything to keep him safe. They would set the world on fire if needed. His mother and her loving arms… she would figure out how to take down anyone bothering him, using all of her connections. She knew how to deal with politics so well, she could do anything. His father, he would send a legion of suits to protect him. He would blast through anything and anyone to come to protect him; he would create and do the impossible to save him. Peter finally felt his body relax, that crushing pressure on his chest disappearing. As soon as he realised it, he gasped for air. It finally got to his lungs. He could breathe again. Peter took a few panicked breaths, trying to recover from what happened, before fully getting back to normal.
“Are you okay?” Gwendolyne asked.
Peter nodded. Well, he was not completely okay, but at least he was breathing. He was not sure what had just happened. Why had he not been able to breathe? That had never happened to him before. When he had first arrived at the Stark’s, he would go days without talking from being so overwhelmed with the change, but he had never stopped breathing. Peter rubbed his chest a bit, as to make sure the pressure was truly gone. Was this a new side effect of being bit by the spider? Gwendolyne would probably have an opinion on that, but he did not feel like talking right now. Luckily, she had seemed to get that and was leaving him to recover, even giving him a bit more space. Being silent felt safe. It was like a way to try to form a bubble around you. You could not stop the word from interacting with you, but you could choose to not interact with it. Peter stayed in his bubble for a bit, also enjoying the silence. He was not sure how much time had passed before he felt ready to talk. He took a few seconds to gather his thoughts, then decided to finally break the silence:
“Gwendoly-“
“Gwen. I go by Gwen.” She cut him off.
“Gwen… I don’t think I can do this.”
She looked at him without saying anything for a few seconds before sitting back down next to him on the couch.
“You have to Peter. It is the only way we can stop them from actually moving to the human testing stage and hurting people.”
Peter looked away from her. He could not deal with how she was staring at him, as if he was disappointing her even though they had just properly met. She did have a point though. They were going to want to move to a human phase at some point. They had unknowingly succeeded with him, so it was only a matter of time before they figured their results with animals were good enough. Peter had been lucky, it had affected him in the best way it could have possibly have. It had enhanced some of his capabilities and even given him some new ones, with minimal side effects. What if other people were not as lucky as him?
“I know… but I am scared. I am so scared. What if they catch me? What if I break in, only to never leave again? You said it yourself, I am a miracle… No way they’d let me leave like that.” Peter explained, staring at the wall in front of him.
There also were all the horrible things he could potentially see. How much unreversible damage would he give his mind if he did end up stumbling into human test subjects? That was selfish. Here he was scared about seeing messed up things, instead of wanting to help people not suffering through that. His parents had raised him better than that, but it seemed like cowardice was an inherent trait, not a learnt one.
“I am truly sorry for making you involved in this mess. It is not fair to you, you did not ask for this, you just wanted to do the right thing that night.”
Gwen slowly rested her hand on Peter’s shoulder. It felt weird, but also comforting. So was her voice, she was speaking so softly.
“You have every right to be scared about going back in there. Your points are valid. Breaking in there is risky for anyone, but even more for you now, but you’re forgetting something.” She continued. “You have superpowers now, Peter. What that spider gave you are actual superpowers. You can either decide to keep yourself safe, which I will understand and not judge you for… Or you can use those powers and become a superhero.”
He looked at her. He had not expected that, not her apologising and definitely not her talking about him becoming a superhero. He was so far from one. He was not brave enough, not strong enough, not mighty enough… Not anything that made someone a superhero.
“I’m not a superhero…”
“But you could be!” Gwen cut him off, removing her hand. “You actually could. You are brave, you helped me when I was attacked. You are selfless, you literally put yourself between me and the guy attacking me, and you got beat up for a stranger! You are probably smart since you are here… and like I said, you have superpowers, which means you are a superhero. You’re like some sort of… Spider-Man, I guess.”
Peter could not help but let out a chuckle. His Dad was Iron Man, and here he was, Spider-Man… A bit weirder, but for some reason he liked it. He had always admired his father so much for being Iron Man, maybe it was his sign to follow in his footsteps in this way as well. Gwen must have picked up on how he was feeling about that name, as she said:
“You could become Spider-Man. Of course, we would have to train you before you go back in. I will help you to figure out your powers and how to use them to defend yourself. We can have some training sessions, I’m sure that all new superheroes have them.”
Training would indeed make him feel better. He would feel less like he was going to the slaughterhouse and more like an actual superhero like Gwen was saying. It did not make all of his worries go away, though. It just made things slightly better. Peter bit his lip, unsure of what to do. He had not investigated and tracked down Gwen to do nothing in the end… but breaking in again was crazy.
“We can train… but that does not guarantee that I will do it, okay? I will see when and if I feel ready enough to go back in.”
He looked at her, wanting to show how serious he was, how he meant it when saying that he was not signing up for this crazy plan yet. Gwen nodded.
“That seems fair to me.”
They exchanged numbers and agreed to meet the following weekend to start the training. In the meantime, Peter was to keep monitoring his symptoms and let Gwen know immediately if something new happened. She seemed to take his health seriously, but Peter had the feeling she was probably more interested in the lab rat aspect of him rather than being scared for him. They would also both try to work on some disguise to avoid being too obvious or being recognised during their training. Once that was all settled, Peter went straight home, burying himself into work to forget about the feeling of doom he had deep inside.
Notes:
I loved writing Peter and Gwen interacting, having them bicker was a lot of fun. A general disclaimer about Gwen: I love her, she is amazing, Peter just needs time to feel like he can actually trust her.
Also, once again, sorry about the dodgy science. Biology is really not my field of expertise.
Chapter 13: I'll make a super-hero out of you
Notes:
Hi,
Chapter 14 (which is a big one again and is the first part of that two chapters combo that are my favourite chapters so far) will be posted next Sunday, the 9th of June.
In the meantime, as always, please do feel free to let me know your thoughts!
Chapter Text
Ever since his conversation with Gwen, Peter had not been feeling great. What he had seen in the lab would constantly creep up in his mind and cause him to nearly be swept by a wave of anxiety. He had been able to shove it off to the side since it had happened, but now it was coming back to mess with him. Luckily, he had found ways to cope with that. Not only that, but they were actually beneficial. He was able to completely focus again when studying, his hyper-awareness finally leaving him alone a bit. In the past few days, he had been able to do so much, that he might have been actually be able to get ahead of his studies for once. This newfound productivity had also helped with Harry’s and his robotic project. Peter had stayed up an entire night, managing to finish his part of the project ahead of schedule. He had even added some extra features, hoping that would get them to win a few extra marks. It was now in Harry’s hands. Peter had dealt with the mechanical side of things, making the robot and testing its physical capabilities, but Harry still needed to program it. It had been the logical divide of labour: Peter was great at making robots, and Harry had all the knowledge needed to make sure that the robot would actually be able to help with the experiments they had designed it for, as those were used mainly for biophysics research.
Speaking of Harry, he was also part of Peter’s coping mechanisms. They had not really had the time to talk much outside of class, except for the occasional text about something random. Peter had been trying really hard to not say anything weird, as he still felt awkward about stealing his friend’s jumper… but that had revealed itself to be a good idea. When Peter would feel too exhausted to study anymore, but could feel his anxiety creeping in, or the apprehension of his training as a “super-hero” starting soon, he would wear the jumper. It was admittedly a weird thing to do, but it helped him focus on why he was going along with this lunacy. He wanted to stop the horrible things going on in the research lab and make sure that Harry would not be attacked like Gwen had been. Thus, it was worth it. Peter had to be brave, it would be worth it. That was what he had kept on saying to himself. Ever since Peter had learnt about Harry’s father being, pardon his French, shitty, he felt oddly protective of him. Hence why he was using him as motivation to actually take down the lab. Of course, he would never admit that to him. Peter did not know much about friendships, but he was pretty sure that telling some dude he had met two months ago that he wanted to protect him was a sure way to be classified as a weirdo and make said guy run away. To be fair, Harry was going to spend the holidays with him, so it was not as if they had not gotten somewhat close… but still. Being around Harry felt nice and Peter was not going to mess that up.
The weekend, and thus training time, came way too soon. Peter felt anything but ready for it. His “disguise” consisted of the same black clothes he used when breaking into the lab, which was a fun reminder that really set the tone for the evening, plus a warmer black coat. Around 1am, when the campus should be empty, he met up with Gwen who would also be dressed in all black. They had picked a spot where they would be mostly hidden by empty buildings. They could have maybe done this at one of their flats, but neither of them was really fond of the idea of possibly destroying their living space in the process. When Peter got close enough to Gwen for her to recognise him, she seemed to have a relieved expression on her face. She had been probably scared he would not show up. He could not blame her, he himself had not been sure if he was going to show up or not until right before leaving his flat. They quickly greeted each other before Peter noticed a black sports bag on the ground next to her.
“What’s in the bag?”
“Well, I was thinking of what skills you might need to be able to defend yourself. As you have probably noticed, I am not a fighter, I have no idea how to fight, so I cannot really teach you that. However, you do not necessarily have to fight.”
Peter would not be against not fighting people. He would probably lose even without his new superpowers.
“Instead, we can focus on you not getting hit. All you will have to do is to go in, get the evidence, and then get out as fast as possible before people notice you. Let’s ensure that if you are attacked, you can still run away mostly unharmed!”
“That makes sense… I think.”
Well, it was not like he could really question her. She was the only person who could help him be somewhat prepared if the researcher tried to keep him in the lab.
“We can still try later to figure out some fighting techniques, as that cannot hurt, but let’s focus on safely fleeing first, okay?”
Gwen turned towards her bag, kneeled, and started opening it. Peter watched her doing it, still curious about what was in it, as she had not answered his question.
“You mentioned you have improved reflexes, right?” She asked.
Peter slightly raised an eyebrow, wondering what she had planned, and thinking that he was probably not going to like it.
“Yeah, why? You’re not going to…”
He did not have time to finish his sentence that something was flying straight towards his face. He barely managed to move his body to the side fast enough to avoid getting hit.
“What the… Are you kidding me?” He said rather annoyed, looking at Gwen. “If you are trying to give me a heart attack, you have nearly succeeded.”
Peter turned to try to see what nearly hit him. It was a small ball. He picked it up and squished it a bit. It was not too hard, being squishy like a stress ball, but it was still something you would not want to get hit in the face by. Especially with a nose that had already suffered barely two months ago.
“I’m trying to test your reflexes, as they might be your best chance to not get beat up again.” Gwen replied, in a very matter-of-fact tone.
Right, testing his reflexes, as if that was the most obvious thing to do ever.
“They do seem to be good, but they could be better. You said that you stopped a skateboard without realising it, that your body moved by itself?”
Peter nodded.
“Yes, I was sitting in the grass, talking to Ha...”
Peter stopped himself. Did he want Gwen to know about Harry? What if she knew him from his job and would thus ask Peter if he was indeed the same Harry. What if she then insisted he was definitely involved in this, declaring him to be some sort of heartless monster. Worst, what if she would want to use the fact that he worked there to their advantage. Peter was trying to protect his friend, no way in hell he was going to involve him in this mess. Considering how determined Gwen seemed, she probably would try to get him to help in their quest for evidence.
“…with a friend, and suddenly I had one arm raised, holding a skateboard. I don’t know how I did that, I didn’t even see it coming and my hand was barely hurt.”
Gwen seemed to think about what he just had said.
“You’re sure of it? You did not see it coming at all?”
Peter nodded. He had been so confused about how he had ended up holding that skateboard. He had not seen it come towards them, not even in the corner of his eye. Gwen pulled something out of her bag again. Peter got ready to duck, having learnt that being trained meant getting things thrown at his head, but she approached him inside.
“You’re going to have to trust me, that I know what I’m doing, but please put this on. Just trust me. I swear, I’m not going to throw anything that might actually hurt you.”
She handed him a blindfold. Peter looked at it, confused. If he was supposed to dodge things, how the hell was he going to do that blindfolded? Oh. Did she think he could sense them coming his way without seeing them? That would explain how he stopped the skateboard, but that theory seemed quite out there. How would that work? How would he be able to know when to dodge? Well, it seemed like this was what she wanted to find out. Peter did not like this at all, but he did have to trust her on this. She knew more about what was going on than him, hence why she was helping him train. He put the blindfold on, hoping he would not show up to class all completely bruised on Monday. Right away, he felt completely vulnerable. Someone could jump at him from any direction, and he would not know it until it was too late. He hated it. The thought that Gwen was going to attack him at any second did not help. Peter could feel all the anxiety had wrestled with all week building quickly in him again.
“Okay Peter, I am going to throw something at you. Do not overthink it, just let your body do the work.”
Peter tried to turn towards Gwen, trying to follow her voice, but he felt so disoriented he had no idea where it had come from. He took deep breaths, trying to relax. That did not seem to really work as he got hit by something in his chest. Luckily, Gwen had not lied about only throwing stuff that was soft enough. He kept trying to turn towards where he had heard Gwen move to, nearly falling in the process multiple times as not being to see was screwing with his balance, but things kept hitting him from all sides. How much stuff has she taken with her?! Was she picking up stuff from the ground? In any case, this was clearly not working. Peter was about to point out that fact, but Gwen managed to beat him to it.
“You’re not very relaxed, are you?”
“Jees, I wonder why. What part of being blindfolded by someone I barely know as she throws stuff at me somewhere isolated is not relaxing? That’s basically what everyone loves to do after work to relax!”
Peter might have been a bit heavy-handed on the sarcasm, but you try being in his position. It was already enough of a miracle that he was not having a panic attack or something, so was it really unreasonable for him to be a bit of an arse?
“That is a fair point.” Gwen surprisingly replied. “Let’s try to make this less stressful for you so you can relax a bit.”
Well, Peter had not expected this response. He had thought she was going to get annoyed at him for not acing her test, but she sounded actually nice. He slowly nodded, not wanting to move his head too fast and feel dizzy again.
“So, Peter, tell me, what do you like to do in your free time?”
“Uh…”
He thought about it for a second. The obvious answer was building robots with his Dad, as that is what he had done during most of his free time before coming to MIT, but he was still not sure how much he wanted Gwen to know about who he was and what would give him away.
“I don’t really get much free time lately.” He awkwardly laughed.
“I can imagine that but humour me. What would you do if you had some?”
Not seeing her made it hard to know if she was annoyed, sincere, or amused.
“I like to watch TV shows, I guess… It helps me relax and think about something else.”
“What kind of TV shows do you like? Which one is your favourite?”
That seemed like a question he could answer without worrying.
“I really like Doctor Who. I’ve started rewatching it lately…” Peter stopped himself right before mentioning he was watching it with Harry. “I guess I like shows with some science-fiction, it makes them interesting… as long as it is not too outlandish or they do not try to overexplain everything, then it becomes a bit annoying in the long run.”
To give credit where credit is due, Peter was indeed starting to relax. It felt nice talking about things he liked instead of worrying about getting hit in the back of his head again.
“What about your favourite colour?”
That sounded like she had moved as if she was not standing in front of him anymore. Peter felt some anxiety about that creeping up, reminding him that he was going to get attacked again, but he did his best to fight that.
“Well, I mostly wear black… but I like blue too. I think dark blue looks the best. I like red as well, it…” He stopped himself.
He was about to say that it reminded him of his dad. He would rather avoid giving weird clues like that.
“It is a nice colour.” He said instead.
“Favourite food?” Gwen asked, clearly having moved again.
“Probably a good cheeseburger, with some…”
He ducked. Why had he done that? He went back to his normal position, trying to figure out where Gwen was.
“Did you throw something?” He asked.
There was a moment of silence. Peter really did not like that. Was she still here or did something happen?
“Yes, yes, I did. You ducked exactly at the right time.” She finally replied. “Impressive.”
She had a weird tone, one that Peter did not love, but he decided to ignore it. Not much he could do about it.
“What did it feel like? Did you feel something coming at you?” Gwen asked.
“No, I just ducked.” Peter shrugged. “Like with the skateboard, I didn’t know what was happening, my body just did it on its own. It’s really like a reflex, you do not think about it, you just do it.”
Well, it would be just like a reflex if he was able to see the objects coming at him.
“You seem relaxed enough, let’s stop talking, and instead please focus really hard on your senses and how your body is feeling. It’s fine if you don’t duck again, I just want to try to figure out what causes your body to duck.”
Peter nodded and shut his eyes harder. He stopped trying to follow Gwen around as well. Instead, he kept his mind focused on how his body was feeling. His back was a little sore, probably due to his bad posture when studying, maybe because of some remnants of his two falls as well. His legs felt restless as if they wanted him to move around a bit. His face, ears, and hands felt cold, being the parts of his body the most exposed. Peter considered putting his hands in his pocket so they would not freeze. He was not supposed to catch the objects thrown at him, but they had helped him when he would try to regain his balance. His ears felt a little painful as well, but nothing he could do about this as he did not take a beanie. A scarf would have been nice as well, to protect his neck a little bit more. Wait, what was this weird sensation at the back of his neck? Something hit him in the shoulder.
“So, anything?” Gwen asked.
Peter hesitated for a second, trying to figure out how to explain what he had felt.
“Yeah, before you hit me… I felt something, on the back of my neck, here.”
He placed one of his hands on the back of his neck and put a finger exactly where he had felt it.
“Can I come closer to see?”
Peter nodded, and soon enough he felt a cold hand on the back of his neck, making him jump a bit. He removed his hand to let Gwen see. He could feel her cold fingers trace over the spot he had shown her. It could have been some sort of nice message, if not for the fact it was freezing and he still felt completely vulnerable.
“I do not see or feel anything different. I can look at it with a loop another time, but I doubt I will find anything. What did you feel exactly?”
“It’s hard to describe… It’s nearly like someone was brushing my skin at this exact spot? So I guess like a tingle.”
Gwen did not reply, meaning she was probably thinking. He waited awkwardly as her fingers were still resting on the back of his neck, being a constant reminder of how exposed he felt. She finally removed them.
“Okay, let’s have you focus on this sensation and try to maybe duck again, so we don’t accidentally train you to not duck when you feel it.”
Yeah, let’s avoid training Peter to not duck, that did not have dog vibes. He pushed that thought away along with his sarcasm. Gwen was here to help him get better at defending himself and understanding his new abilities. He should be grateful for that, not act all offended every time she would word something wrong. He nodded and they went back to training. Gwen kept throwing stuff at him, changing where she would throw them from. Peter did not manage to avoid all of them, but he did seem to get better. He was not solely relying on his body’s instinct to duck on its own, he was more and more able to react to the tingly sensation he would feel. He could not, however, figure out where the object would be coming from. He could duck, not catch them. They tried that, multiple times, but as long as he could not see them, he could not catch them. However, without the blindfold, he was not too bad, managing to catch a few even when they had barely been in his line of sight. That meant he had either gotten lucky with the skateboard, or he had barely seen it and not realised it.
They then moved to shooting webs. Instead of catching objects, Peter would throw webs at them. He was definitely better at catching than at aiming. Gwen had to quickly move out of the way multiple times to avoid getting hit. They also had a lot of cleaning up to do to avoid leaving too much evidence of their presence and Peter’s powers behind. At some point in the night, after training for well over an hour, they decided to call it quits when Peter got exhausted. Once everything was more or less how they had found it, they said goodbye to each other, agreeing to meet next weekend, and went on their separate ways. Once Peter got home, he barely took the time to change into his pyjamas and crashed right away into his bed.
Chapter 14: And suddenly you’re all I need
Notes:
Here is chapter 14 (which ended up actually bigger than chapter 12 after some proofreading), I hope you will enjoy it.
Content Warnings
Bullying (very vague mention)
Bullying is very vaguely mentioned after “He really did not like talking about it, but he could not let Harry think that Uncle Rhodey was just not a nice person.” And it ends at “Harry stayed silent for a second and Peter could feel his gaze on him.”
Death of a parent
Death of a parent mentioned between “Don’t get me wrong,” and “never held hands with anyone romantically”.
Chapter Text
The following week went on pretty much the same way. Peter was still unable to relax, his anxiety making sure of that. There was an odd sense of doom that would sometimes creep in, but never long enough for him to try to figure out where it came from. Things had not changed with Harry either, except for the fact that Peter would sometimes catch him looking at him weirdly. He was not sure what that was about, but he did not have the energy to worry about that. Between all of his coursework and his anxiety causing him to have sleep issues, he did not have a lot of energy to spare. Speaking of Harry, he did finally come over to Peter’s flat. It had always been Peter going to his so far, as the time Harry had walked Peter back to his building did not really count. Harry came in only to pick up the robot for their project, but still. It had felt weird, having someone over for the first time. It was like showing Harry a piece of his soul via his flat. Harry was supposed to carry the robot to his own flat by himself but that turned out not to be possible. Peter had noticed the robot was heavy, feeling how his muscles had to work to lift it up, but he had still managed without too many issues. Harry, however, was barely able to lift it off the ground before saying it was going to wreck his back, even though he actually worked out, unlike Peter. It was clearly not a case of Harry being too weak, but of Peter being too strong. Peter made a mental note to bring it up to Gwen and then made some excuse of using equipment to lift the robot while he had worked and thus had not realised its weight. That seemed to work, and he then helped Harry to bring it back to his flat, making sure to not lift too much of it and to appear to clearly struggle.
It was then once again time for his training session with Gwen. It went pretty much the same as last time, except for the fact that Peter was actually getting better. He managed to duck everything right away, without having to do all of the chit-chat. Now that he somewhat understood what made his body duck, it was easier to duck without relying solely on his instincts. He also got better at throwing webs. He would still miss way more often than not, but this time he would not only miss, he would also hit stuff. By the end of their training session, the muscles in his arms felt so sore. Interestingly enough, where the web seems to come out of him on his wrist and around also felt on fire. It was somewhat similar to how he had felt just before he produced his first web. He, of course, had told all of that to Gwen, feeling gross in the process, and also had mentioned him being stronger than he realises. She had made her usual thinking face and told him she would keep it in mind. Whatever that meant. Peter had essentially no people skills, but Gwen was not much better.
Again, a week full of anxiety and of more weird looks from Harry came and went. Peter was going to start thinking that he grew a second nose on his forehead that he had failed to notice or something. For the third Saturday in a row, he had his training session with Gwen. His aim drastically improved, which should have been a good thing, if it had not meant Gwen wanting to take his training to the next step. She wanted him to test out his defensive capabilities in an actual fight. As she was not much of a fighter herself, they would need someone else to fight him. Yeah, sure, cause after only three weeks of training, he was totally ready to fight someone. She had assured him she would figure out how to do that safely, but Peter had trouble seeing how she was going to accomplish that. This lovely revelation had for effect to make his mood and mental state even worst, even following him into Sunday.
Peter spent the whole morning and early afternoon in a terrible mood, not wanting to do anything but feeling frustrated about doing nothing. It really sucked, not being able to do anything, not even something you enjoyed, but sit around and think about how annoyed you were about sitting around. He thankfully managed to force himself to eat something around noon, making a grilled cheese sandwich, hoping it would bring him some comfort. It did, but just a tiny bit. It was still better than nothing. A bit after 5pm, his intercom buzzed. He got startled so badly that he jumped. It could have been worse, like that time when Eri had startled him and made him fall from the ceiling. Should he answer the intercom? Who could that be, he was not expecting anyone today. Should he just ignore it? Peter was considering doing that when the intercom buzzed again. He sighed and took it as a sign. He tapped the screen to see who was at the door, yay technology. It was Harry, holding a big bag and nervously waiting for an answer. What was he doing here? Peter spoke through the intercom:
“Harry? Were we supposed to meet or something?”
Harry tried to see where the sound had come from and seemed to spot the camera, looking right at it.
“Hi, Pete! No, but I come bearing gifts, so let me in.”
He offered his damned smile to the camera. That smile that would always make Peter feel weird. Even through the screen, it had that effect. That should have not been allowed.
“I don’t know, I don’t feel great today. It’s really sweet, but I think I’d rather rest…”
Peter really did not have the energy to pretend he was doing well, he just wanted to suffer through his bad mood alone. Upon hearing that, Harry’s smile dropped a bit.
“Peter, I know you have not been feeling great lately, please let me do this for you.”
Well, that took Peter aback. So that was why Harry had kept on looking at him weirdly. Peter sighed. He had to pull his shit together. He could not have Harry worrying about him, he would try to figure out what was wrong and get himself into this mess. What good training would do if Harry still ended up in danger?
“Okay, come in.” He replied, not having the heart to fight him.
He buzzed Harry in and opened his flat’s door, waiting for him. Soon enough, he heard him coming from the lift. He appeared, smiling again, clearly happy to have managed to convince Peter to let him in.
“Thank you for taking pity on….” Harry stopped in the middle of his sentence and stared at him. Peter replied by raising an eyebrow. “Is this my jumper?”
What? Peter looked down. Fuck, he had forgotten he was wearing Harry’s jumper. He had put it on to try to alleviate his mood, but then it had completely slipped his mind. He felt his face starting to burn. He looked back at his friend, who had turned a bit red. Shit, shit, shit…
“No.” Peter replied.
Why did he say that? It was obviously Harry’s, that was such a stupid reply. Harry also seemed confused at his reply. It was a strange sight, his face all red and confused.
“I mean yes.” He tried to correct himself. “I mean… I guess?”
They just stared at each other.
“I can take it off if you…”
“No.” Harry cut him off. “No. It looks good on you.”
Harry diverted his gaze and cleared his throat. It looked good on Peter? He was not sure how, but guessed it was not worth asking. He finally noticed that he was still standing in the doorframe, with Harry still in the hallway. What a lousy host he was.
“Right, thanks… Anyway, come on in.”
He moved out of the way to let Harry enter and then closed the door behind him. Harry moved to the living room. He stopped for a second, seemed to take a deep breath or something based on how his shoulders moved, and then turned around.
“Remember how you told me about your mother dyeing your hair and making a self-care day out of it?” Harry asked.
Peter nodded. He remembered telling him about it that day they were sitting in the grass together. Harry had noticed his roots while touching Peter’s hair, prompting Peter to tell him about his little tradition with his mother. He tried to force the memory of how Harry’s fingers in his hair had felt down.
“I thought that, if it is okay with you obviously, we could have something a bit like that. You have been looking stressed out lately, which is understandable with all the work we have, so relaxing a bit would probably do you some good. I can dye your hair and we can relax. I even brought some charcuterie, I know you love charcuterie as that’s what you mostly ate the first time we hung out at my place.”
Peter stayed silent for a second. He was not sure how to react, Harry was just… he was just so sweet. That was so nice of him, to not only remember all of those things but then to use them to try to make Peter feel better. Peter would usually not expect anyone outside of his family to not only actually listen to him and care about what he was saying, but then to plan something nice for him just because he seemed down. Harry was doing that, though. He had tried to do that with the soup as well. Peter was not going to make him regret trying to be nice this time
“Sure… Yes. Yes, I would like to do that.”
Harry smiled and then started to take things out of his bag.
“Here is the charcuterie.” He took out a big Tupperware. “I got some other snacks as well, some nice crunchy veggies to not overdose on the charcuterie. I bought a bunch of hair dye because I was not sure which brand and exact shade you use.”
“I have an unopened tube of dye, we can use that.” Peter replied.
He had bought some before coming here, figuring that he would probably not have the time to go to a salon to have his hair maintained… but instead, he ended up not even having the time to deal with it himself. He should have dyed his roots forever ago, he probably looked like a clown now.
“Okay, that’s good! I did not get any drinks as you don’t really seem into that, but we can always get some delivered if needed. I also took some masks we can put on while letting the dye or the bleach do its thing. Oh, and I took some bleach as well. For your hair, obviously.”
Harry had formed quite the pile on Peter’s coffee table.
“I usually get away with not having to bleach my hair as it’s quite lighter than the brown I use.”
Harry seemed relieved.
“That is good because I was scared to fry your hair!”
“Don’t worry, I will guide you through the dyeing process, I am quite used to it.” Peter laughed.
He then looked at everything Harry had brought. He had really come prepared. The bad day Peter was having had suddenly turned into a good one, and he was so thankful to his friend for that. He was lucky to have him.
“Let me get you some slippers and then we can go dye my hair in the bathroom, might as well do it first so we can properly relax afterward.”
Peter got Harry a pair of slippers his parents had gotten him in case he had a guest over. Peter had found it unnecessary, not thinking he would have anyone over, but he had been wrong. Once Harry put them on, they moved to the bathroom, where Peter took out the dye. He also took out some gloves he had bought with it, some cream to avoid ending up with dye on his forehead, and two brushes.
“Okay, I have already washed my hair this morning, so no need to do that now. I have gloves and brushes for the both of us, all the products I need…” Peter thought out loud. “but I did not take the sacrificial tee-shirt with me.”
“The sacrificial tee-shirt?” Harry asked.
Peter noticed how close they were now. His bathroom was not as big as back at home, due to him now living in a flat, so it felt a bit cramped with the both of them in it.
“Yes, I usually have a tee shirt that I always wear when we dye my hair, but I do not have it.” He paused for a second, trying to think of any tee-shirt he had that he was willing to destroy. “It’s fine, a big towel should be enough. Just give me a sec.”
He grabbed a towel he did not care about and went to his bedroom to remove his jumper and tee shirt. He wrapped the towel over his shoulders, to protect them, his neck and his back. He secured the towel with a bunch of clips. It still left the lower part of his chest and his abdomen a bit exposed, though. That should not be a problem when dealing with the dye and when it came to Harry… Well, Harry had seen him completely bare-chest already, so it would be fine. He went back to the bathroom, convincing himself that he should not be embarrassed about being as exposed as he currently was. As he entered, he saw Harry glancing at what the towel could not cover before quickly diverting his gaze to Peter’s face. Peter decided to not think about that so he would not get even more self-conscious and quickly combed his hair and then applied the cream around his hairline, his ears, his neck, and such places. Once that was done, he put on his gloves. That was when he noticed that Harry had taken off his own jumper and rolled up his sleeves, probably not to stain them with the dye. He put on the second set of gloves and Peter could not help but think that his forearms looked…nice? That was a weird thing to think, there were just forearms. True, they were somewhat muscular forearms, at least more than his, but still. Oh well, it was probably coming from him being tired after not being able to sleep well. Peter forced himself to snap back to reality and prepared the dye. Once it was ready, he spoke:
“I have some clips if we need them, but we are only doing the roots, so only put the dye on the blondish parts. I will do the front and the parts I can see in the mirror, you do the back.”
Harry nodded.
“That works for me.”
They started working. Feeling Harry’s hand all over the back of his scalp felt a bit weird. Peter did not like and was not really used to having people touching his hair, hence why he really preferred to have his mother dye his hair instead of going to a salon. The sensation was not horrible in this instance, but it was definitely strange. He ignored it as he focused on his part of the work. After making sure that all of his roots were covered in dye and protected, so he would not go around and stain things, they set the timer. They removed their gloves and moved back to the living room.
“We’re lucky, we have about the amount of time needed to do the masks.” Harry said, picking up what must have been two masks. “I got two sheet masks. I have one that is supposed to be strawberry, and the other one that is apparently kiwi… which is a bit weird for a mask you would think, but it’s my first time doing a mask. I just got those to match the whole self-care thing, so who am I to judge?”
Peter would have preferred the strawberry one, but Harry did not seem to love the kiwi one. He decided to be nice.
“I will take the Kiwi one. That seems like an interesting one.” Peter laughed.
Harry handed it to him and Peter took it. He opened it and started to take the mask out of its bag. It had a very strange texture, he was not sure he really liked it. Oh well, he was going to have to suck it to make Harry happy. He slowly applied it to his face, tapping it a bit so it would stick.
“Am I doing this right?” He asked, trying to not move his mouth too much and tilting his head a bit backward so that the mask would not slip.
Harry looked at him and burst out laughing.
“What?” Peter said, trying to figure out what his friend was laughing about.
Not answering Peter’s question, Harry kept laughing for a bit, even bending in laughter. Peter awkwardly waited, not knowing what was happening until Harry finally stopped laughing.
“I’m sorry Pete, you just look so funny and cute…” He finally replied, catching his breath.
Peter felt his face burning, again. Nobody but his parents had called him cute. His mother would call him cute all of the time, but she was his mother.
“Just let me…” Harry said, stepping towards Peter.
He was not sure what he was going to do. He felt his face burn even more as Harry was a bit too close to him. Harry raised his hands, moving them towards Peter’s face, but then stopped.
“May I?” He asked, his fingers a few centimetres from Peter’s face.
Peter would have nodded, suddenly not sure he was able to speak, but that might have made the mask slip.
“Sure… yeah.” He said, despite having no idea what Harry was asking permission for.
He instinctively held his breath as Harry’s fingers once again inched closer to his face, while he was intently looking at him. Peter found himself unable to look away from Harry’s eyes, even if he was not looking into his, as he felt his fingers touch his cheeks. They moved to his jaw, softly applying some pressure. Oh god, why was Peter’s heart beating so fast? Why was Harry so close? Peter felt like he was either about to pass out or have a panic attack, he could not tell which. As Harry’s fingers finally reached his jaw, they left his face. He then touched Peter’s forehead and slid his fingers across. Oh, Harry was making sure that the mask was sticking correctly to Peter’s face. Well, that made sense. As Peter started to breathe again, Harry repeated the procedure a few times. He was not sure where to look, his friend being so close to him and still intensely looking at him, making sure everything did stick correctly. Peter decided to look away, struggling a bit to swallow his saliva.
“Okay, now you’re not looking as crazy anymore.” Harry finally said, breaking the silence.
He took a step back and seemed to admire his work.
“Yeah… thanks…” Peter said, letting out an awkward and nervous laugh.
God his stomach felt like a mess. Why did it feel so tight suddenly? He tried to shake off this weird sensation as Harry put on his own face sheet mask, making sure it stuck properly.
“So, how do I look?” He asked.
Peter did his best to recompose himself and look at his friend. The face mask did make him look funny, he understood now why Harry had laughed, especially when his own mask had probably been hanging from everywhere.
“You look funny.” Peter said, smiling.
Harry tilted slightly his head to the side.
“Aw, I don’t look cute?” He said, flashing his signature smile.
For fuck’s sake Harry, Peter nearly died at that one. He had not had the time to recover from whatever had just happened that Harry was teasing him, give Peter a break. Good thing Peter was wearing a face mask, as he was probably a bright shade of red. Harry must have still noticed, as he nudged him softly with his elbow.
“I’m teasing, Pete. Let’s sit on the couch, I am getting tired of standing for no reason.”
Harry sat down and he did the same. Peter tried to shake off all of the weird feelings he was having, not wanting to make things even more awkward. He tried to think of a way to play things off. After a few seconds of silence, he turned to his friend.
“You know what, if you think that you’re so cute right now, we should take a picture.” He said, clearly trying to call Harry’s bluff.
Harry looked at him and then smiled. That smile was a wicked one.
“Sure, we can even send it to your parents, so they know who is responsible for your great hair when we go to see them over Christmas.” He replied, obviously amused.
Ah, Harry was calling him on his bluff. Peter looked at him. If there was one thing he had gotten from his father, not counting his love for robots, was his need to be always right. He would usually be able to manage it to not be a pain to everyone, but Harry had tickled that need by calling his bluff like that. There was no backing down now. Trying to look as unbothered as possible, Peter shrugged.
“If that makes you happy.”
Peter took out his phone and Harry moved closer to him. The sides of their arms were now touching. They kept on being so close to each other today, that was weird. Well, no, it was not weird. They had just been dyeing Peter’s hair, then Harry had just adjusted his mask, and now they were just taking a selfie. It was perfectly normal, Peter was just being weird about it. He opened the camera app on his phone and raised it so that his and Harry’s faces were fully visible, and so was the mess that was on his head.
“Okay, ready?” He asked. “One, two, three,…”
Peter tried to smile, but as usual, it looked a bit weird. Ugh, why could he not flash a great smile for the camera like Harry did?
“Don’t worry, you look great.” Harry said, apparently noticing his annoyance.
Peter looked at him and Harry offered him a reassuring smile.
“Thanks, I just suck at smiling.” He laughed. “Anyway, let me send it to you…”
“And to your parents.” Harry added.
“And to my parents.”
It seemed like he, too, had some kind of need to always win. Still not wanting to back down, Peter sent the picture to Harry, and then to the group chat he had with his mother and father. Oh well, he would have to deal with them asking questions later. That reminded Peter he was supposed to ask his friend some questions.
“It’s sent. By the way, my mother wants to know what you want for Christmas.” He looked up from his phone to Harry.
“You can tell her it’s sweet she is asking, but I do not need anything. Not being alone during the entire holidays is enough for me.” He replied, smiling.
Peter laughed a bit.
“I would tell her that, but she would still get you something, even if you do not tell her what you like. So it’s better to just tell her and get something that you do like.”
Harry seemed to think for a bit, probably trying to figure out what to ask as a gift.
“Well, I like to cook… I also like to read sometimes… Anything related to that would be greatly appreciated.” He finally replied.
Peter nodded.
“She also wanted to know if you have allergies, what kind of food you like, and if there is anything she would need to know to help you feel comfortable…?”
Harry shook his head.
“No allergies, I like pretty much all the food out there, even fast food now thanks to you.” Harry chuckled and smiled at Peter. For some reason, it made his cheeks burn a bit. “And no, I don’t think so… Except that I am so very thankful to spend the holidays with you and your family.”
Harry gave him a smile, that was not his signature one but a sweet one. Peter tried to return it, liking seeing it.
“I’ll tell her, but be warned that she is probably going to go on and on about how a sweet boy you seem to be!” Peter replied with a little bit of sass, trying to tease him.
“Oh, but that is my goal, Pete!” Harry chuckled. “I will be her new favourite son.”
They laughed together, but it was in part true. Peter was convinced his mother was going to really like his friend. He hoped the rest of his family would too, but there was no reason for them not to, and Harry would surely learn to appreciate them as well.
“Speaking of your family…”
Harry shifted a bit in the couch, as to turn towards Peter. He was still quite close to him, not having moved back after taking the picture. Harry put his elbow on the top of the couch backrest and rested his head against his hand.
“How are they?” He asked. “I mean, anything I should know?”
That was a surprising but fair question. Harry probably just wanted to be prepared and not make a bad first impression. Peter would have not thought of giving him a rundown on his family, but if that could help make him feel comfortable, sure, why not.
“There’s my mother, but clearly, you don’t need to worry about her, Mister future favourite son.” Peter laugh. “Then there is my father. He can be… You’ve probably heard how he can be.” They both chuckled. “He will be on his best behaviour, though. So what you need to know is that he’s just really glad that I made a friend.”
That was a bit embarrassing to say that, that made him look like a loser who could not make friends… even though that was true.
“He will probably try to bond with you or something, if he gets too much, just run to my mother or me. Then there is Uncle Rhodey.”
Peter looked at Harry. Oh god Uncle Rhodey meeting a friend of Peter’s for the first time, that was going to be interesting. Harry raised an eyebrow.
“Is Uncle Rhodey whom I should be worried about?” He asked.
“He means well.” Peter quickly clarified. “He loves me very much and… well…”
Peter took a deep breath. He was going to have to overshare a bit and talk about things he really did not like talking about. Damn it, did he really have to talk about this? Harry delicately put a hand on his shoulder. He had straightened up, using the hand against his head that was previously resting.
“It’s fine Peter. You don’t have to tell me anything. If you want to, you can, but you don’t have to.”
His voice was soothing, and so was his hand. Peter wished he could wrap himself in his voice. He shook his head. He really did not like talking about it, but he could not let Harry think that Uncle Rhodey was just not a nice person.
“I know, I know… It’s just at some point my parents tried to enrol me in a school, a private one, so I could try to socialise with other people my age and make friends. I had been homeschooled before that because that is what had worked better for us.” He took a deep breath. “It did not really go well. I had thought I had made friends… but no. Uncle Rhodey had to help me deal with the situation because I would not tell Mom and Dad… I mean my mother and father. Ever since he has gotten extra protective of me.”
Peter looked at his hands, avoiding looking at Harry. He felt so embarrassed. He could hear all of their laughter again.
“I’m sorry Peter…” Harry said.
God his voice sounded so soft. How was he doing that? Peter shrug.
“It’s fine. I got homeschooled again, which I preferred anyway because classes were more fun that way.”
Well, it had not been fine, but he was not going to tell Harry all about that.
“Still…” Harry stayed silent for a second and Peter could feel his gaze on him. “Thank you for letting me know, I will do my best to reassure Rhodey.”
Harry removed his hand from Peter’s shoulder. He was not sure what to say now. He did not really want to talk anymore actually. He was going to force himself and ask how much time was left before it was time to rinse the colour when Harry spoke again.
“Since we are sharing, I did not have the best time either at high school.”
Peter was surprised to hear that. He would have thought that with a personality like his, he would have tons of friends and be happy. Fighting his desire to go hide in a hole, he turned towards Harry.
“Oh?” He said, trying to encourage him.
Harry nodded.
“Don’t get me wrong, it’s probably not as bad as what happened to you, but after my mother died… I guess you can say I spiralled. She was everything to me, my entire world, my safe place.”
Harry sighed. Peter wanted to give him some comfort like he had given him but he was not sure how. Should he put his hand on his shoulder?
“I started hanging out with the wrong people, I made dumb decisions. I was quite the party animal. I don’t want to think about the things I did… nor the people I did.” Harry turned his face away from him, probably feeling that his face mask was not enough to hide his face.
Peter – never held hands with anyone romantically – Stark suddenly also wanted to hide his face. He had not expected such a subject to come up. He was not surprised that Harry had… um… done things with people, he was quite handsome and had a great personality, but talking about this subject was still not one of Peter’s forte. He had literally run away from his parents when they had tried to have “the talk” with him. Even Uncle Bruce had failed to talk with him about that, and that was quite something as he was probably Peter’s favourite person to whom he would tell anything and everything. Or nearly everything, as he was not planning on sharing with him his newfound powers. However, no matter how he felt about the subject that Harry had just brought up, he still wanted to let him know that he was in a safe place and could share anything he wanted. Peter would have to suck it up and act like an adult. So, to encourage his friend, Peter awkwardly placed his hand on his shoulder. It felt weird, but he knew Harry liked physical contact. That had been obvious from that night when he had rested his head on Peter’s shoulder for what had felt like forever. Harry turned his head to look at Peter again, clearly surprised. He seemed to offer him a small smile, but it was hard to tell through the mask. Still, Peter guessed he was probably thankful for his touch.
“Like I said, I was not the most well-behaved high school student. I have no idea how I managed to still get the grades I did… probably thanks to my tutors that somehow managed to keep me on track despite my behaviour and to my father doing whatever he does when I have my back turned. Anyway, before the end of high school, I had a bad falling out with my so-called friends and that made me snap out of it. I realised I was so incredibly lucky and very privileged, let’s be honest, to still be able to go to MIT and I did not want to waste that opportunity.”
Peter was not sure what to say, but tried to say something nice:
“I’m glad you decided to pull yourself together. You seem like a pretty good student.” He hesitated a few seconds and then added. “And you are a really good friend.”
He offered Harry a sincere smile. Harry looked at him for a few seconds and then just hugged him.
Chapter 15: You’ve got a friend in me
Notes:
Here is chapter 15 (which is basically chapter 14 part 2), I hope you will enjoy it! I am planning on releasing a chapter per week again (as I have nearly 10 chapters of backlog now) but I might have to change when I post from mid-July to a bit before mid-August as I will be going on a family holiday (will still release a chapter per week but the day and time might change). Please feel free to tell me what you think of chapter 15, especially about the end as I had a tricky time figuring/writing it out (I had to rewrite it as the original one had left me frustrated/unsatisfied).
Chapter Text
Harry had just pulled him tightly into a hug, but not too tightly for it to be unpleasant. Peter stayed frozen for a second or two, trying to process what was happening, but then decided to just go along. He let Harry find the comfort he needed, wrapping loosely his arms around his friend’s waist as he had wrapped his over Peter’s shoulders. He even let his head rest on Harry’s shoulder, patiently waiting for him to feel okay enough to let go. It was not as if Peter was not enjoying the hug, it was nice, very nice even. It felt like what he had imagined being wrapped in Harry’s voice would feel like. The pressure against his chest and Harry’s scent overpowering everything felt so comforting. It did not feel like the hugs Peter had had with his family, though. It should have had as it was a hug, and he had had tones of hugs with them so he knew what a hug should feel like, but it did not feel the same. There was this extra sensation in his stomach, the same one he had gotten when Harry had been so close to him earlier to fix his mask, and that time Harry had rested his head on his shoulder for a while. Peter could not describe it, not in exact terms at least, but he knew it was something he had not felt before. Deciding not to worry about it for now, Peter kept enjoying the hug. He was starting to feel his eyes slowly becoming heavy. His body was so relaxed, like when he was about to fall asleep… but the timer rang. It made both of them jump. Harry quickly backed away, clearing his throat.
“Let’s rinse your hair.” He said.
Peter nodded and removed his face mask before standing up. Harry did the same. Peter could see that his friend seemed a bit weird. He was probably either still embarrassed about what he had shared or about their hug. To be honest, Peter would be a bit confused if it was because of their hug, as Harry had never been embarrassed when they made physical contact before. Peter also knew that he sucked at understanding humans, so he did not really trust what he would find weird to be actually weird, and what he found to be normal to be actually normal. Harry and he both went to Peter’s bathroom and started to try to figure out what would be easier to remove the dye: washing Peter’s hair in his sink or his shower? When his mother would dye his hair, he would usually just kneel in front of their bathtub and his mother would deal with washing away the dye. However, Peter did not have a bathtub in his flat. The sink should be okay as there was going to be Harry helping him out.
“I think we can do it in the sink, you will have to take care of the back and tell me when the water is all clear.” Peter said while grabbing two new pairs of gloves and handing one to Harry.
“That’s fine.”
They put on the gloves and Peter removed all the protection from his hair. He then turned the water on. He made sure it was neither too hot nor too cold and put his head underneath. He started to rub his hair and skull, trying to get rid of the dye. Soon enough, a second pair of hands joined his. It nearly felt like a massage but with a lot more rubbing. They kept working together. Peter had his eyes closed, as he did not want to become blind from the dye, so he had no idea how clear the water was now. After a while, Harry finally spoke.
“I think we’re nearly done. Remove your hands so I can make sure we did not miss any dye.”
Peter obeyed, using his hands to stabilise himself instead by holding on to the sink. He felt something touching his side, probably Harry coming closer to inspect his hair. Indeed, Peter felt his friend’s hand combing through the front part of his hair.
“Okay, we’re done. Let me stop the water for you.”
The water stopped and Peter straightened up. After being hunched over for a while, that felt good, especially since his face had started to feel a bit too hot, probably all the blood rushing to it, and his back was still not the best. He opened his eyes and quickly grabbed another towel to dry his hair. He threw the towel that had been over his shoulder on some towel rail. He would deal with it later.
“I’m going to wait for you on the couch.” Harry said.
Peter turned towards him and noticed Harry seemed to be trying to not look at him. Was he still acting awkward from the hug or was it because Peter was bare chest? He hoped he did not make him uncomfortable by removing his towel without asking.
“Okay.” He replied and Harry left.
He quickly dried his hair with the clean towel, then went to get something to wear instead of walking around bare-chested and possibly making his friend uncomfortable. He decided not to wear Harry’s jumper as 1) it was embarrassing to wear it with its original owner present, and 2) he did not want to stain it with leftover dye accidentally. Instead, he threw on some random sweatshirt and went to comb his hair. When that was done, he joined Harry back in the living room. Harry had started to lay out and open his Tupperwares. It did look like he had brought some nice snacks, he did have good taste in food.
“If you don’t mind we could start having some of the food, I’m getting a bit hungry hanging out around it.” Harry explained.
Peter smiled, no wonder Harry was getting hungry, he was getting hungry too just by looking at the food.
“I’m not going to complain about eating now! Should we watch something?” He suggested, hoping it would make things a bit less awkward.
“We can keep watching Doctor Who, if you want?” Harry replied.
Peter was not sure if Harry was offering that because he wanted to watch it, or if he wanted to make Peter happy, but either way, Peter was going to take him up on his offer.
“Absolutely! Let me just get some water and plates first.”
Doing his best to be a good host, Peter set everything up and soon enough, they were watching the show while eating. The charcuterie Harry had brought was so good, and the vegetables were indeed a nice crunch. When the first episode finished, they played the next one as they had not finished their food yet. Despite them being busy watching the show and eating, Peter could feel some awkwardness. He had no idea how to deal with it but still wanted to try to fix it. Should he say something? Should he not say something? Ugh, he was not made for this kind of situation, he would probably make it even more awkward if he did try to fix it. He did not even know why it was awkward, so how could he address it? They finished eating during the second episode and decided not to go for a third one. Instead, they sat without saying anything but it did not feel like quietly existing next to each other, rather it made the lingering awkwardness even more apparent. Harry had been hanging out at Peter's flat for a while now, was it time for him to leave now? Did Peter want him to leave? No, not really, as always it felt nice to have him around. It was like the comfort Harry’s jumper would bring him, but even more effective. Did Harry want to leave? Maybe. Maybe that was why he was acting so awkward: he wanted to leave but did not want to hurt Peter’s feelings. Okay, if that was the case, how could he let Harry know it was okay to leave without making it sound like he wanted him to leave? Peter was working on that, trying to find the right words when Harry spoke.
“I’m sorry I jumped at you like that earlier.”
Peter looked at him, confused about what he was talking about.
“I should have asked before hugging you.” He added, clarifying for Peter what he meant. He then looked at him. “I hope I did not make you too uncomfortable.”
So the hug was indeed why he was acting so weird, and it was because he thought he had done something wrong. Well, that made more sense than suddenly being weird about physical touch, why had Peter not figured it out on his own? Now that he knew the root cause of the awkwardness, he could fix it and get them back to normal. He started with his best attempt at a comforting smile and said:
“Don’t worry about it, I did not mind the hug. I would have told you if it had made me uncomfortable.”
Peter thought about his words for a few seconds.
“But it did not make me uncomfortable, that’s why I did not say anything.” He added.
He was repeating himself, but he wanted to make sure he was clear about it so that Harry would stop worrying. Harry looked at him for a second and then seemed relieved.
“Okay, good.” He said. “It’s just that when you called me a really good friend… I know you had just talked about your father being glad you’ve made a friend, but it did not register until you called me that.”
Oh, right, Peter had never called Harry his friend to his face. He had mentioned Harry to others as being his friend, but until tonight, he had never told him that they were indeed friends. Peter had thought he did not need to, as he had just started to call him his friend in his head randomly, but he should have known better. Peter had seen his reaction when he had snapped at him for being too friendly, he had seen the mess he had been after his father told him not to come home for Christmas. Why had he not connected the dots? Of course, Harry would need some reassurance.
“Well, it’s true. You’re my friend. You are a really good friend, and you are my closest friend.” Peter said.
Well, he was his only age-appropriate friend, but still, he was indeed his closest friend who was not forced to be his friend due to being family with him. Harry smiled, looking at him for a moment.
“You’re my closest friend too. I’m so glad I sat next to you during our first class and used my flawless charm on you.” Harry replied while laughing.
Peter tried not to blush. It was just some friendly banter.
“Ah, yes, your flawless charm consisting of giving me a nickname I did not like and making me soup, which I absolutely loved to be fair.”
He thought a bit about when they had first met, which was not even that long ago. He would never have imagined he would get this close to Harry, especially this fast.
“I’m not complaining about it, but why did you sit next to me?” Peter asked.
This had always intrigued him, especially in the beginning when he did not trust Harry at all, coming up with every possible bad intention he might have. As they became closer, he let that question go, as it felt like it did not matter anymore, he was just glad to have a friend, but their conversation brought his curiosity back to life. Harry seemed to hesitate for a second, which Peter found weird as it was a straightforward question, but he waited.
“I have to admit that I did know who you were when I sat next to you.” Harry said.
Harry was looking at him, seemingly worried. It was like he was waiting to see how Peter would react. Peter had seen enough of those looks on his parents’ faces as a kid to recognise it. Peter decided to try his best to wait for Harry to explain himself fully before going back to being paranoid of him. Harry would not just admit to Peter that he had been trying to manipulate him or something, right? So he must have had a good reason.
“I had heard about you during some galas we both went to.” Harry explained, still looking at Peter. “People were talking about how shy you were, but that you were apparently a good kid or something like that.”
Peter did remember going to galas and hiding behind his parents the entire time, wishing he could just go home. He did not recall seeing Harry at any of them though, but would he have remembered him if he did? He was terrible with faces, so probably not. He also had not been aware he had been the subject of gossip, but could he really be surprised when he was a Stark?
“It was brought up multiple times because of how different to your father you seemed.”
Well, that checked out. People loved comparing Peter to his parents, especially to his father.
“Anyway,” Harry said, clearing his throat and straightening up. “the point is that I heard you were nice and not into the lifestyle I was trying to run from. I knew I needed a friend, I am way too sociable to survive through MIT without any friends, but I did not want to risk finding myself in the party scene that had led me to some bad decisions, so you seemed like a good candidate.”
Peter did not love the fact that Harry did approach him because he knew who he was already, but his reasoning did make sense and it had not been for nefarious reasons. He simply wanted to make a friend that would not remind him of past mistakes. That was understandable. Had he been pushy when trying to become his friend? Yes, a bit. Would Peter have made a friend otherwise? No, probably not. He could live with that being the reason for their friendship.
“That seems fair enough.” Peter finally replied.
Harry’s shoulders dropped a bit and he let out a sigh. He must have been worried that Peter would not take it well after being so paranoid at the beginning of their friendship. Peter could not blame him
“And you know, I did hear about Dr. Octavius’s assignment.” Harry added with his irresistible smile.
Peter looked at him offended.
“You did not!”
Harry laughed and looked Peter in the eyes, clearly amused by his reaction.
“Arg, you…!” Peter tried to think of an insult.
“I’m kidding, Pete, I’m kidding! I mean, I did figure that being friends with someone who is essentially a robotics expert when taking a robotics class would be quite helpful, but that is not why I pushed for us to hang out. That really was because I just really wanted to make a friend and I had heard good things about you.”
Peter looked at him for a second, still a bit offended. If their friendship was genuine, which it seemed to be, he could forgive him for hoping to get some help from him with the robotic class.
“You’re lucky your soup is really good.” He decided to reply.
If Harry could use him to get help in robotics, Peter could use him to get some delicious soup.
“You have my mother to thank for that.” Harry sighed.
Right, his mother, who died… Peter was trying to figure out if he had said the wrong thing again, but Harry changed the subject, apparently deciding it was a good time to rant about one of their lecturers. Peter happily joined, as he did not like that lecturer either. They talked about him for a while, and then of other university-related things. It was already pitch-black outside when they stopped talking, but that was not surprising as the sun would set before five in the evening now. Quite derepressing, right? Peter and Harry had seemed to run out of things to say, at least for now, as they were simply sitting, enjoying each other’s presence. After a while, Harry broke the silence again.
“It’s getting late, I should probably head home.”
Peter looked at him. He really did not want him to go, even if he had been there for hours. His presence was so comforting, he did not want to have to deal with his anxiety all alone again, but could he really ask him to stay? Peter had stayed for him; he had spent the night on his couch. It was not the same thing though, Harry had been a mess, he was not. Would it be selfish to ask him to stay then?
“I also have to work tomorrow, which means a long day with all of our classes, so that’s just lovely.” Harry added.
Right. Work. At the lab. At the lab where they were doing messed up experiments. At the lab where they had people who had tried to silence Gwen. At the lab where Peter had been bitten by that freaky spider. At the lab where he was going to have to break into again. At the lab where they might turn him into a test subject if they caught him. At the lab where Harry worked, unaware of all the danger he was in. Right, that lab, Harry was going to go to that lab tomorrow.
“Peter?”
Harry was going to be in the same building as those responsible for the messed-up experiments, in the same building as those doing the experiments.
“Peter, are you okay?”
What if Peter got caught during the next break-in? What if they then discovered he was friends with Harry? What if that got him in trouble? What if… He felt a hand on his shoulder. He jumped a bit and looked at it. It was Harry’s. He was looking at him a bit worried. Shit, he nearly had a panic attack again, and this time in front of Harry. Not good. Peter nodded his head, trying to calm down his thoughts. He was okay, and Harry was going to be okay. Everything was okay. He focused on Harry’s touch. It felt nice and gave him something to focus on that was not his worries.
“Should we have a sleepover again?” Harry suggested. “The last one we had was nice. Unless you want to be left alone, that’s completely fine too.”
God, yes, Peter definitely wanted to have a sleepover. He nodded enthusiastically. Harry smiled, such a sweet smile that Peter felt himself melt and wished he could feel the pressure from the hug again.
“I might have to steal some of your clothes tomorrow then.” Harry said. “I know you are going to enjoy watching me rock a sweatshirt and some jeans, I am going to look so cool!”
Peter chuckled at the thought. The great Harry Osborn dressed casually while in public, that would be quite a sight indeed. Hopefully, some of his clothes will fit his friend.
“People might not recognise me, Pete! Who would expect to see me in a sweatshirt?! Nobody!” Harry said as if he was talking about doing the most scandalous thing ever.
Once again, Peter could not help but chuckle a bit. Harry did really know how to be funny
“Ah, the things I would do for you, Pete…”
Peter knew what he was doing. Harry was doing his best to make the situation light again, probably thinking it was the best way to deal with whatever had just happened to Peter. He was probably right.
“Like sleeping on your couch, which I might add, is definitely not as comfy as mine. We should have our next sleep-over at my place, and I am not saying that because that means I will not be the one sleeping on the couch, of course not!”
Harry did have a point. His couch was comfier than Peter’s. Was it really fair to make him sleep on a couch when he had a double bed? If Peter only had a single bed, then yeah, the couch would be the obvious choice, but he had a double, not a single. After all the heart-to-heart they had tonight, they were probably close enough as friends to share a double bed… and of course, what was the point of Harry staying the night if Peter could not actually feel his presence? It would not be weird, right? Friends probably did that all the time during sleepovers.
“You…” Peter started.
He cleared his throat. He needed just one more second, one more deep breath. He was okay, he could talk to Harry.
“We… can share bed… if you want?”
Harry looked at him. Was he surprised? Was he touched? Was he weirded out? Peter could not tell at the moment, he had not the energy to try to figure that out.
“I have… double-bed.” He added.
Harry removed his hand from Peter’s shoulder to his regret, and passed it through his hair.
“That would be, without a doubt, more comfortable for me, but I do not want to make you uncomfortable in the process, Pete.”
Peter shook his head. He would have hoped that Harry would now get he did not make him uncomfortable, that quite the opposite, he felt more uncomfortable without him than with him, but oh well.
“It’s fine.”
He had managed a full sentence, progress. He was glad Harry did not seem to mind him struggling with words. Harry stayed silent for a bit, as if lost in thoughts but then combed his hair with his hand again. That was weird.
“Okay, let’s get ready for bed then.”
Peter nodded and stood up. He managed to find a brand-new toothbrush for Harry and went to find him a pyjama. As he preferred pyjamas that felt a bit lose on him, not liking feeling like someone was trying to choke him as he slept, he figured out pretty much any of the ones he had would fit Harry okay, so he did not waste too much time picking one and put it down on the bed. As Harry joined him in the bedroom after cleaning his teeth and whatever else he needed to do, Peter realised Harry and ERI had not met before. ERI had stayed in his bedroom when Harry had stopped by to pick up their robotics project and had done the same thing tonight. Peter quickly introduced them with a couple of words before going to brush his teeth and change in the bathroom. When he came back he made sure to knock first so as not to stumble on his friend half-naked. Harry was sitting on the bed.
“I was not sure on which side you usually sleep on.” He explained.
Peter appreciated that, definitely not wanting to switch sides. He slid under the covers on the left side, and Harry imitated him on the right side of the bed. Peter laid down, noting that it was the first time he was sharing a bed with someone who was not part of his family. He had shared a bed plenty of times with his parents, but that was pretty much it. As to not start overthinking the situation he was in, he just turned off the lights when he felt Harry stopped moving and tried to find a good position to sleep in. Even though they were on completely different sides of the bed and Peter had his back turned to Harry, he could still feel his friend’s presence. He could feel how the bed was slightly warmer and how the duvet did not rest exactly how it normally would. Peter was tempted for a second to turn around to be able to see Harry. It would be nice to fall asleep watching him, knowing he was safe with him. However, Peter knew that if he did that, he would then be tempted to look for more warmth, for the one he had felt during their hug. He also knew that would make things weird, and he did not want that. He did not want to do something wrong and lose Harry’s presence. So instead, he simply enjoyed the knowledge that his friend was near to him and slowly started to drift asleep.
Chapter 16: Friends and family
Notes:
Hi, here's chapter 16, I hope you'll enjoy it. Chapter 17 will be posted on the 30th of June.
Chapter Text
Something was moving through Peter’s hair. That would have usually alarmed him, but it felt so nice. It was like a massage, going in circles at several spots on the back of his head. Sometimes the circles would stop and instead, the thing would stroke his hair. It was quite pleasant, and he felt so warm and comfortable, so much so that he wished he could stay like this forever. As he lay there, enjoying the massages, his mind started to clear up and he realised he was in his bed at MIT. Right, he probably had classes and stuff. Ugh. He wanted even less to get out of bed now. He also had so much homework still to do, it was so annoying. Luckily, since his alarm had not rang yet and Eri had not come in to inform him he was going to be late, Peter figured out he still had some time to lay in bed and enjoy those massages. Wait, who was doing those? If he was at MIT, it could not be his mom or his dad. As he felt the realisation settling in, making his stomach drop, he opened his eyes and prepared himself to scream and run away. Right before Peter did that, he remembered. Harry. Harry had decided to stay over last night and had slept in Peter’s bed after Peter offered him to share it. Peter relaxed again. There was still a possibility that Harry had left, and it was a weirdo playing with his hair, but that was not very probable.
Peter did not know if it was weird or not for Harry to be playing with his hair. To Harry’s defence, he had spent the previous evening with his hands in Peter’s hair, as he had helped him to dye his roots. They had also hugged for a while and even decided to share a bed… so they were maybe just that type of friends? They could be friends who would hug and play with each other hair, do that kind of things. Some friends could be quite tactile from what Peter had seen. He did not think he would be that type of friend, but he had never had a proper friend before, so he had probably just thought wrong. Whatever the type of friend he was, Peter knew that Harry’s hand massaging his head felt nice, so he was not going to complain. As he continued to enjoy it, Peter tried to not move. Harry was probably thinking he was still asleep. If he realised that was not the case, then he might get embarrassed, like he had seemed to be after their hug, and stop. Peter definitely did not want him to stop… but of course, a phone alarm went off. It did not sound like Peter’s alarm, so it was probably Harry’s.
“Ah, shit.” Harry mumbled as he removed his hand from Peter’s head.
It was the first time Peter had heard Harry swear. Well, Harry had somewhat sworn that time a skateboard had nearly hit him in the face, but it had not been a proper swear word, at least not to Peter’s recollection. The alarm stopped, but there was no point in Peter acting as if he was asleep, so he started to move around and sit down.
“Sorry about the alarm, I forgot to turn it off last night, I know you usually wake up later…” Harry explained.
“It’s fine.”
Peter looked at his friend and felt again that weird sensation in the stomach, the one he had felt during their hug. He was looking so… raw? His hair was all messy, not the “pretend to be messy but his actually perfect” messy but the proper messy. He was wearing Peter’s pyjamas, not his nice shirts and trousers as if he was expecting to go to a board meeting later. He had that not fully awake expression, the one you have when you are still trying to find the strength to get out of bed. It was quite a sight to see. Harry Osborn, still in pyjamas, still in bed. In Peter’s bed. Oh god, that nearly made him blush. Why though? They had just shared a bed like two friends having a sleepover, nothing weird.
“Are you feeling better?” Harry asked.
Peter nodded, with Harry on his side he was definitely feeling better.
“That’s good.” Harry stretched and then sighed. “We should probably get ready since we‘re awake anyway.”
As always, Peter did not really want to get out of bed, but his friend had a point. They would have all the time they needed to get ready and would not have to rush.
“You’re right. You can shower first if you want, and for breakfast I have either cereals or fruits if that is okay?”
“That works for me.” Harry said, getting out of bed. “Do you mind if I borrow some clean clothes?”
Oh, right, they had agreed that Peter would lend some of his clothes to Harry. It was only fair after Harry had done so for him.
“No, of course.”
Peter got out of bed and started going through his clothes trying to figure out which one would fit Harry the best.
“I’ll just start showering, you can drop them next to your sink when you’ve found some since your shower is opaque anyway.”
Peter nodded absent-mindedly, still trying to find a good outfit for Harry. He wanted him to not feel too awkward in his clothes, but most of Peter’s “nice” clothes would probably be a bit too tight and short or were more suited for the summer. After reviewing all of his clothes, Peter figured out it was probably better for Harry to just wear some less classy clothes than some ill-fighting ones or to be cold. Thus, Peter picked a plain dark grey sweatshirt, a long-sleeved tee shirt and some black jeans. He also picked a pair of socks. Should he also give Harry a clean pair of underwear? No, sharing some underwear, even a clean one, would be weird. Harry had not given him one, so he probably should not either. He then, as requested, went to drop the clothes, with his face burning as he did his best to look anywhere but towards his shower despite the opaque glass. He knew he would pass out from embarrassment if he even saw Harry’s silhouette in the shower. Peter then started to get ready. When Harry came out to the bathroom, wearing Peter’s clothes, Peter thought for a second he was hallucinating. They did look nice, or even really nice, on him but it felt like the kind of thing you would see in a really weird dream, not on a Monday morning.
“So, what do we think?” Harry asked.
Peter had learnt from the last time his friend had asked it.
“You look cool! They fit you well.”
Harry smiled and thanked him, clearly indicating that he had answered the question correctly. Peter then went to shower instead, making sure to not wet his hair so he would not ruin the dye. It was already time to leave when both students finished getting ready, so they quickly rushed out the door, going to their first class of the day. They were starting the day with Dr. Octavius, which Peter would always use as motivation when trying to get out of bed on Monday mornings. He definitely would have to thank whoever was in charge of their timetable. They made it to the room ten minutes before the start of the class, which was what Peter would usually aim for. They went to their usual seats: front row, not too far from the lecturer’s desk but still a bit more towards the centre to have a better view. Such a bunch of nerds, right? They were turning on their computers, Harry borrowing an old one from Peter, as Dr. Octavius entered. As usual, they quickly greeted him as he himself started to set up. As he was organising some papers, he looked up and then back to his papers, which was not weird as something moving might have caught his attention. What was weird, however, was how he looked back up again, this time straight at Harry. He seemed to stare for a few seconds. He was probably just surprised to see him dress this way, as he was wearing clothes very different than his usual ones, but then, Dr Octavius looked at Peter. Then back to Harry. Then finally back to Peter. Had he figured out that Mr. Osborn was wearing Mr. Stark’s clothes? Anyone familiar with Peter could recognise that what Harry was wearing was Peter’s usual style of clothing, but Dr Octavius did not know about their sleepover last night, so why would he think it was Peter’s? Oh. Oh. Peter felt his face burn, probably more than he had felt before, and quickly looked away. Dr Octavius was not going to assume they slept together or something, was he?! Well, they had slept together, but not like that! They had slept next to each other, not with each other. Peter’s reaction had probably made it even worse, acting all so embarrassed, but he was embarrassed! Of all the people who might have noticed that Harry might be wearing Peter’s clothes, why did it have to be Dr. Octavius?!
“Is something wrong, Pete?” Harry asked, apparently oblivious.
Peter vigorously shook his head, nearly breaking his own neck while doing so. He really wanted to go hide in a hole right now. Dr. Octavius started his class, and for its entirety, Peter could not bring himself to meet his eyes. He nearly ran away when it ended, but had to wait for Harry, not wanting to explain to him why he was booking it out of there so fast.
“See you tomorrow, boys.” Their lecturer said smiling as they passed them.
After that eventful morning, the rest of Peter’s day went as usual. He was grateful for that, as another awkward encounter might have been the final nail in the coffin for him. When Peter got home, it immediately hit him how empty it now felt without Harry around. He could feel remnants of his presence. Peter would see his couch and hear Harry laugh and call him cute, he would go to his bathroom and remember how small it felt with the both of them in it, he would go to his bedroom and feel Harry’s hand in his hair again. Peter was getting really attached to him it seems. Before starting to study, Peter finally checked the group chat he had with his parents. He had not had time to read their response since he had sent that picture with Harry the previous night. It was pretty much what he had expected: his mother saying they were cute, his father asking what was on their face, his mother explaining it and then him saying they should do their own self-care day and sending a silly picture to Peter too.
After dinner, he could not help but think about how Harry was probably already at the lab, or would soon be. He thus found himself once again unable to study. Instead of getting frustrated like he did yesterday before Harry had come over, Peter decided to call Uncle Rhodey. He had not talked to him since he had left the Malibu villa, so it would be nice to hear from him. More importantly, talking about Uncle Rhodey to Harry had made Peter realise it might be better if he warned his uncle before showing up with a friend for Christmas. Peter’s parents might have already mentioned it to him, but it would still be better for them to talk about it. The call went to voicemail the first time Peter called, but that was not unusual. Uncle Rhodey was a busy man and would rarely answer on the first try. Peter called him again a bit later, sitting on his couch, and this time he picked up.
“Hi Peter, everything’s okay?”
“Hi Uncle Rhodey, yes, yes! Everything is fine. I just wanted to talk to you a bit, are you busy?”
“Not right this second, but things have been hectic lately. You know how it gets. How’s MIT? How are they treating you?”
No matter how busy Uncle Rhodey was, he would always make time for Peter, even if it meant sacrificing some of his sleep. Peter was so very thankful to him for that, but once he had figured out what the cost for his uncle to be able to listen to him rambling was, Peter had learnt to be a bit more succinct. He would rather have a healthy uncle than one able to listen to every dumb thought he might have.
“It’s okay. They’re giving me so much work, but that’s kinda the point of them.” Peter summed it up.
“Hard work is the key to success, Peter. You just need to stay focused and keep going. You’re so very smart and serious unlike your old man, you’ll be fine.”
Peter smiled. The familiarity in Uncle Rhodey’s encouragements and how he would never miss an opportunity to make a joke that would annoy Peter’s father made him feel better, even though he missed his uncle’s and father’s bickering so much.
“Thank you, Uncle Rhodey.”
Usually, Peter loved taking his sweet sweet time before dropping a truth bomb on one of his family members, trying to prepare them as much as possible. However, he could not really do that here with Uncle Rhodey, as 1. no amount of prepping would make him react better to this announcement, and 2. Peter wanted to take as little of his time as possible.
“I’ve also made a friend and I’m actually bringing him with me for Christmas. I ran it through Mom and Dad, but I wanted to let you know.”
There was some silence. Right, Uncle Rhodey was probably processing what Peter had just told him.
“Don’t worry, he is really my friend, I trust him.” Peter added.
There was a bit more silence, then Uncle Rhodey finally spoke:
“What’s his name?”
That should be an innocent and straightforward question, but Rhodey was a Colonel in the U.S. Air Force with friends in other, more nosy, organisations.
“His name is Harry, I am not telling you his last name.” Peter replied.
Peter knew that if Uncle Rhodey truly wanted to find out Harry’s last name, he would simply ask a favour of someone who would be able to find it out for him along with everything there was to know about Harry, but Peter was not going to make snooping easier for him.
“Why not? If you really trust him you can tell me, he will have nothing to hide.” Uncle Rhodey pointed out.
“Because if you want to know his last name so bad, you can find it out yourself. Or, alternatively, you can trust me.”
Silence again. Peter then heard a sigh.
“You know I trust you, Peter, I just worry for you. You’re my nephew, it’s my job to make sure you’re safe, and I hate to bring up the past, but the last time you thought you made some friends it did not end well. I just want to make sure this Harry guy is not going to hurt you or use you.”
Well, Peter could tick “Uncle Rhodey brings up the friend situation” off his bingo card.
“I know for a fact he is not going to use me like they did.” He replied, trying to not get sassy or angry.
“How do you know, Peter, how do you know?”
Even though Peter really loved and trusted Uncle Rhodey, it sometimes truly felt like his uncle did not trust him. Could Peter blame him though? Peter had been a shitty judge of character in the past and his uncle was definitely not letting him forget that. After weighing the pros and the cons for a few seconds, Peter gave in.
“His last name is Osborn, okay? He’s Harry Osborn, so that’s how I know he won’t use me. And you’ll see, Uncle Rhodey, he really is my friend. He makes me feel safe and okay when he’s around. They never made me feel like this way and you know it.” Peter sighed. “You can snoop and do whatever you want to do, but please be nice to him when he’s there for Christmas. Please?”
Peter waited for his uncle to reply. Hopefully, Uncle Rhodey knowing who Harry was would make him at least a little bit less paranoid.
“Okay Peter, I’ll behave, but you can let him know that if ever hurts you, I will kick his butt. You let him know that I’m serious, okay?”
That was good enough for Peter.
“Okay Uncle Rhodey, I will let him know.” Peter hesitated for a second. “Can you maybe not tell Mom and Dad that he’s Harry Osborn? It’s not that I care if they know who he is, I just don’t want them snooping.”
One person going through Harry’s past was enough, he did not want him to get dissected by his entire family.
“Sure, I won’t say anything. I am going to have to go soon, is there anything else you need to tell me?”
As suspected, Uncle Rhodey was quite busy.
“No, I just wanted to let you know about Harry. I’ll see you over winter break.”
“Yes, see you then, and take care of yourself, Peter. You know I love you, right?”
Uncle Rhodey’s voice had become softer at the end. Peter could see the face his uncle would usually make on the rare occasions he would use that tone and felt his uncle’s love deep inside his bones.
“I know.” Peter sighed. “Me too, and take care of yourself too, Uncle Rhodey.”
Rhodey hung up and Peter let himself fall against the couch’s backrest. Well, that could have gone both better and worse. At least his uncle had promised to not scare Harry too much, so that was a definite win. Surprisingly enough, the knowledge that Uncle Rhodey was not going to try to put the fear of god in Harry during Christmas helped Peter to focus enough to study for the rest of the night.
The soothing effects from the self-care evening helped Peter to survive through the week. He would still sometimes have waves of anxiety, but he could close his eyes and picture himself back during that evening, making breathing a little bit easier. A bigger wave of anxiety hit him when Gwen texted him towards the middle of the week. Seeing her name pop up on his phone had nearly given Peter a heart attack. He had expected to hear from her, as she was supposed to figure out a way for him to learn how to fight, but he had somehow managed to put that at the back of his mind. Seeing the text brought back all of his worry about how on earth she was going to succeed in her task. Well, the text answered that to a certain extent. She was asking him how much cash he would have on hand to pay someone. It was clear that the payment was not only for the lesson but also for the person teaching him to keep their mouth shut, which Peter absolutely wanted them to do. Thus, he answered he would have enough for whatever they were asking for. It might tip Gwen off that he was well off and she might investigate, but he did not want to risk the person deciding they were not paid enough to shut up. She answered an amount that was definitely not small, the teacher or whatever was clearly taking advantage of the situation, but nothing that would be a problem for Peter. His parent had left him some emergency cash, so he already had some on hand and would be able to go replace it as his parents never checked what he would do with his allowance, completely trusting him. Being the reasonable son of a billionaire did come in handy when trying to become a sort of superhero. A little while later, Peter received another text from Gwen giving him a meeting time and place, and the instruction to find some sort of face covering. As if he had a robber kit on hand. Well, he had until Friday at 10 pm to figure something out, so it would be hopefully enough time.
Chapter 17: Just a man and his will to survive
Notes:
Hi, chapter 18 will be posted on the 7th of July.
Chapter Text
When Friday rolled around, Peter could feel his usual pre-training anxiety coming back but much more intensely. He really did not love the idea of going to meet some stranger for a couple of reasons. Firstly, he did not know if they were sketchy or not and if they might try to hurt him. Secondly, they could become one extra person aware of his “situation”. Gwen had assured him that she had told them basically nothing and that if he used something to cover his face and thus mask his identity he would be fine. Right, as if someone who was going to teach him how to fight, and thus was really good at fighting, could not just rip a mask off if they wanted to. Anyway, Peter was still obviously going to wear something over his face and he hoped that being extra generous would make sure that the person was not going to do anything to possibly hurt him. Indeed, he had decided to give a little bit more than what Gwen had told him they had agreed on to really make sure he would shut up. As for something to cover his face with, all Peter had managed to find was some ski mask. He had had to buy a bunch of other ski supplies alongside it to not look like he was about to go rob a bank later. He had then cut an extra hole for his mouth, wanting to make sure he could breathe as much as he would need to when possibly fighting some guy.
Peter had also looked up the address Gwen had sent. It corresponded to some boxing gym, so it did not really take a genius to figure out who might be teaching him what fighting techniques. Learning how to box was definitely not something Peter had considered doing in the past, as both sports and touching people were not things he really enjoyed, but here he was. Being taught by a boxer would probably help him during the break-in: if he got corned he would be able to throw a good punch to try to get out of it. He did have a lot more strength now, he could probably manage to throw a nice punch after a bit of training. Peter tried to focus on this optimistic view to motivate him to actually go train instead of hiding and explaining to Gwen that he did not need to learn to fight after all. He arrived in front of the gym right before it was time to meet at 10pm. All the lights seemed to be turned off inside, meaning it was probably close. That would make sense as he would expect his lesson to be one on one. Gathering all of the courage and willpower he could muster, he put on the ski mask and went to knock. He did not have to wait long before someone opened the door. The guy definitely had the look of a boxer with some big arms probably full of muscles, being quite tall and with that “do not mess with me” look on his face. No need to worry sir, Peter was not planning on messing with someone twice his size.
“You’re the guy whose girlfriend called me for the private lessons?” He asked with a voice that definitely matched his intimidating physique.
Peter nearly said no, as he did not have any girlfriend the last time he checked, before realising he probably meant Gwen. Gwen was not his girlfriend, but she might have come up with some creative backstory to explain this whole mess. Had she told him about it? She must have had.
“Yes…?”
That did not sound very convincing. The big guy clearly thought so too as he raised an eyebrow.
“Yes, it is me. Sorry, I am just nervous.”
That seemed to do it as the man moved aside to let Peter come in. He definitely needed to work on his people and improvisation skills. Peter entered and then followed the man to a very big room where there was a bunch of equipment and a ring in the middle, thus it was probably the training ring.
“Alright, your girlfriend told me you would bring cash. I take the payment upfront, don’t want to spend an hour training you for you to tell me you forgot it or some bullshit like that.” The man said, clearly eager to just be done with all of this.
That seemed fair, and it was not like Peter could really argue that him getting paid afterwards was better. Not that he wanted to anyway, he was smart enough to not make someone more than twice his size mad. Thus, he quickly gave him the stack of cash he had prepared. The man took it and started counting it. Peter nervously waited, he too was eager for this to be done. The boxer looked up at him and seemed to hesitate for a second. Had Peter messed up and not taken enough money? He had made sure to bring extra, so how would he have screwed that up?
“There’s more than what we had agreed on.” The man finally said.
Oh, he was making sure Peter had not given him too much by mistake. Well, that was quite honest and nice of him, he could have pocketed the extra money without saying anything. That eased Peter’s mind a bit. Hopefully, it meant he was less likely to sell him out. Peter nodded.
“I know, but I am very grateful that you’re taking the time to teach me one-on-one.” He replied.
Should he also mention it was to make sure that the man would shut his mouth? If so, how would he do that? He had no idea how to imply it without saying it directly.
“Right, right… Rest assured, your girlfriend has already explained quite thoroughly how embarrassed you are, I’m not going to spill the beans.” The boxing teacher said as he put away the money.
Uh? What had Gwen told him? What was he supposed to be embarrassed about? It was a good explanation of why the guy needed to keep this a secret, but now Peter had no idea how to respond. Once the money was safely stored in his bag, the man turned towards him again.
“She also told me about how they messed up your face.” He added. “I’ll make sure we avoid it, so we don’t mess up any of your wounds, but you really don’t need to wear that ski mask. I can guarantee you that I’ve seen worse… I maybe even got worse back in the days when I was still in the ring.”
Right, okay, Peter had been beaten up and that was why he wanted to take boxing lessons, to protect himself properly, and he was embarrassed about it. Why was he embarrassed? Uh… Manly man stuff? Right, cause he definitely looked like someone who would care about manly man stuff. His face had been completely messed up, hence the mask. He could work with that backstory. He was definitely not going to complain about it, as it meant fewer chances to go to class with a messed-up face. Showing up on Monday with a black eye would definitely not make Harry worry even more.
“I’d still rather keep it on if you don’t mind.” Peter replied as he could not tell him that it was not why he was wearing it. “But thank you.”
The man shrugged.
“Okay, you’re the one who’s going to suffer even more, not me.”
Yes, Peter was quite aware of that fact, thank you very much.
“So, I know you have no past experience in fighting, but what would be your strengths and weaknesses, if you had to guess?”
Peter thought about it for a second.
“I have very good reflexes.”
That was an understatement. In the past, Peter would have considered his reflexes, or rather lack of reflexes, as a weakness but now they were a definite strength. Thank you, weird spider.
“But my coordination is not great?” Peter added, unsure if it would matter in this context.
The guy nodded so it seemed to be relevant.
“Okay then, let’s see that.”
He instructed Peter on how to put on some gloves and protection, before doing so himself. They then stepped inside the ring. Peter suddenly felt a twig in a space reserved for centuries-old trees. The man assumed some sort of fighting stance, with his gloves near his own face. Peter tried to imitate him. They were not actually going to fight, right? The man had clearly stated to be aware of the fact that Peter had no previous fighting experience, so throwing him into the ring and letting him figure out what to do was not the logical way to do things, right?
“I want to test those reflexes and see your coordination, so I’m going to try to swing at you. Don’t worry, I will be gentle.” The boxing instructor explained.
Peter was not sure how “swinging at someone” and “being gentle” could possibly go together, but it did not seem like the man was expecting him to ask questions.
“Okay…” He said, trying to mask his fear and most definitely not being terrible at that.
Without warning, which was kind of the point, the man tried to punch Peter towards the upper part of his chest. Without really thinking about it, Peter bent back to avoid it. The man then tried to punch him on his shoulders, and Peter again managed to avoid it. They repeated this dance a couple of times before the man aimed for Peter’s face. Luckily, once again, Peter managed to duck just in time to not get hit but felt like the man had just cheated.
“I thought we were going to be mindful of my face?”
The man did not reply and instead started to swing at him faster. Peter kept ducking or moving out of the way just in time, feeling suddenly quite grateful to Gwen. It seemed like his training had indeed worked. Peter was starting to feel a bit more confident as seeing a boxing teacher not being able to hit him felt quite good. That was until he felt a sudden pain in his stomach, making him fold in two and wrapping his arms around it.
“You need to move your feet more, you’re too static.” The guy said in an emotionless voice.
Peter was too busy trying to figure out how to breathe again after having the wind knocked out of him to come up with a witty reply. He had the feeling that the man had felt his cockiness develop and this had been his revenge. Still, had it really been necessary for him to punch Peter that hard? When he felt more or less okay again, Peter straighten up again and tried to not look too pissed.
“Right.” He replied.
“Ducking works well enough when your opponent is aiming high-up, but it won’t do anything for you if they aim lower down. You’re acting as if you’re stuck to the floor or something, that’s not good, that’s not what we want. Have you ever watched a boxing match?”
Peter shook his head. The guy seemed a bit annoyed at that.
“Well, if you had, you would have seen how people move around the ring when they fight, they don’t stand in the middle and just punch each other until one of them passes out. So, we’re going to have to work on that.”
Peter nodded, waiting to hear if they were going to do that right now or later. The guy quickly removed his gloves and grabbed some weird oval gloves, putting those on instead.
“Now, I want to see you throw a punch.”
Peter looked at the man who was now looking at him expectantly.
“Come on, we don’t have all night, just try your best, okay?”
He wanted Peter to punch him on the oval gloves? That did not seem like a good idea, like at all. Maybe he was just expecting a light punch? Peter could try to do that. He was not yet sure how to control his force, but if he was extra careful, it should be fine. He took a deep breath and threw a very light and slow punch. The guy looked at him, clearly not impressed.
“I meant a real punch, you don’t have to hold back like that.”
Peter tried again, but it came out as pathetic as the first one. He was too scared to hurt the guy to punch properly.
“Come on, don’t be a coward, just punch for fuck’s sake.” The boxing teacher said, clearly annoyed.
Knowing full well he could probably manage to knock the guy off his feet, Peter had to fight hard to not get cocky again. He had already learnt tonight to not be too cocky the hard way. He swallowed his pride instead.
“I’d rather do it on a punching bag if you don’t mind.”
The man let out an annoyed groan.
“Fine.”
He removed his gloves and went to set one up. His attitude was getting a bit to Peter. Was he doing this on purpose to force him to put some actual force in the punch? If he did, it was clearly working, but maybe he was just being a dick cause he was one. Once the punching bag was set up, the guy said:
“Here you go, now punch it properly.”
Peter took a deep breath and threw a punch. He did not put all of his force into it, not wanting to freak out the guy, but it seemed to be still a good one as the guy had to stop the bag from swinging. Peter’s instructor stayed silent for a second, looking at him, before saying:
“You call that a fucking punch? My 2-year-old nephew could do better!”
Peter tried to not look too offended but probably failed. His 2-year-old nephew could do better?! For some reason, Peter really doubted that. Still, it did not feel nice to hear that and he was getting tired of the guy looking at him as if he was pathetic. He threw another punch, this time harder.
“Dude, put some actual force in it, you look like a school-girl play-fighting.”
He threw another one, again harder.
“Oh yeah, you were right to not punch me, I would have been so hurt!” The man said in a sarcastic voice that would put Peter’s father to shame.
Another punch. Harder. As they kept going, the guy making a degrading remark for each of his punches, Peter could feel his anger rising. He always had had some anger deeply hidden: anger towards the world for only caring out his last name and not who he was, anger against all the people who had hurt and taken advantage of him, anger against everyone that would underestimate him, anger about never feeling like he fit in, anger about feeling like he would never be able to be his own person, anger about Uncle Rhodey not trusting him, anger about his aunt abandoning him, anger about being forced to become a superhero and possibly hurt himself both physically and mentally to protect Harry.
“No wonder you got beaten up and now your girlfriend doesn’t feel safe with you!”
Peter’s anger all finally boiled over, after years of hiding deep inside, it all went out. He let out a frustrated scream and put all of his anger into his fist. The bag flew across the room, violently hitting the wall opposite to them. He turned to his teacher, looking him straight in the eyes and standing in such a way that made his body look bigger without realising it. He took a step towards him without breaking eye contact, waiting to see if he would open his mouth again, waiting to see if he would give him a reason to throw another punch.
“What the fuck did you just say?”
The guy stayed silent, crossing his arms and holding Peter’s stare. Peter felt smug. His teacher did not look scared and was looking down on him, but he was definitely not talking now. For once in his life, Peter did not feel like he should be the one scared; he was the one with the most strength. His anger finally started to get back down as he was breathing hard, recovering from the punch. That was when he finally realised that he had fucked up. He had fucked up bad. Instead of controlling his strength to appear normal, he had used it all and it had of course kept increasing. It had already been more than what Peter should have considering his lack of muscles, but now it seemed to be going on super-human strength territory. All of Peter’s other symptoms had seemed to stabilise but not his strength. He would have to talk to Gwen about it. Peter finally stepped back and sighed, expecting his teacher to either kick him out for threatening him or to demand to know what was up with his strength. Both of those options deeply sucked.
“Yeah, okay, the damages are on me, I guess.” The guy said.
Peter looked at him confused, before turning his head towards where the bag had flown. Right, it had somehow managed to damage the wall. Great.
“I’ll pay for it.” Peter said.
The man shook his head.
“No, you tried to contain your strength, I pushed you too far.”
He stayed silent for a second, probably trying to figure out if he wanted to address the fact that his student had super-human strength or not. Peter waited, ready to panic and run away to avoid questions.
“But yeah, you definitely need to control your strength when fighting if you don’t want to gravely injure, or even kill, someone. We will work on that too.”
Peter nodded, still trying to catch his breath and coming out to whatever that was.
“Yes, please, I just want to learn how to defend myself.”
The guy gave him a small smile. That was surprising. He had been acting all tough and serious, even mean when trying to motivate his student, and Peter had basically just threatened him. Peter was not sure why he was smiling, but he hoped it was because of a nice reason.
“That’s what you’re paying me for. Anyway, remove your gloves, we’re going to work on those legs, you did enough punching for today.”
Peter obeyed, removing his gloves. When he did so, he noticed his hand did not look so good as it was quite red.
“Shit, I should’ve made you put some wraps on too, I was just not expecting you to have so much damn strength!” The guy said. “Let me get you some ice.”
He left, probably to get the ice, and Peter looked at his hand. He had been so angry that he had not noticed until now how much it was hurting, but it was now hitting him fully. He was really hoping he did not break anything. It did hurt to move it, but not probably as much as it would if it was indeed broken, so he was going to stay optimistic. His teacher came back with a bucket of ice and made him put his hand in it. Peter winced at the pain.
“That hurts.”
“Yes, but it will keep the swelling down, so just bear with it.” The guy replied, in a voice that sounded a bit emotionless again.
After keeping his hand in the ice for around ten minutes, the boxing teacher let him remove it. Peter was still confused about how he had not felt the pain until he saw the damage, but that would probably be a question for Gwen. The guy examined his hand, which strangely reminded Peter of Harry doing the same after the skateboard incident. It somehow felt very different.
“Okay, the damages look superficial so you should be okay. I would still advise avoiding punching anything until next week.”
Peter could not help but let out a chuckle.
“I was not planning on punching anything in between our lessons.”
The guy shrugged.
“Just thought I’d warn you in case you did. ” He said before grabbing a skipping rope. “Anyway, time to work on those legs.”
Peter took the skipping rope before looking at his teacher.
“I don’t know how to use this…”
He did not want to question his teacher, but he was also confused about how a skipping rope would help him to learn how to defend himself.
“That’s fine, I am going to show you.” The guy replied while grabbing one for himself.
He started teaching him how to use the rope and how to jump in the particular way he wanted Peter to jump in, but Peter was terrible at it. As he had warned the guy, his coordination was simply the worst. They spent what felt like an eternity on this until the teacher finally called it a night. Peter’s hand was not hurting anymore, but that might be because he was too focused on how much his legs were absolutely killing him. To make matters worse, the boxing teacher wanted him to practice during the week before they met at the same time and the same day next week. Apparently, the skipping rope was included in the price Peter had paid, lucky him. He would have to make sure Eri would not film him while practising to make a compilation of his epic fails. The guy then walked him back to the door, but as Peter was about to leave, he stopped him.
“I just wanted to make clear that I didn’t think what I said when I was training you on the punching bag. It was just to have you punch as hard as you could.”
Peter had figured that out, or rather hoped that was the case, but it still felt quite nice to have that confirmation. He nodded.
“I know. I’m sorry for freaking out and damaging the wall.”
The guy looked at him for a second before patting him on the shoulder.
“Alright, don’t do anything stupid before we meet again. See you next week.”
Petter was not sure why he was saying that, what he had figured out about him, but it felt nice to have someone wanting him to stay safe in possible superhero stuff. Maybe the guy was not too bad.
“See you next week.”
He then disappeared into the night, eager to finally remove the ski mask which had become all sweaty and stuck to his face.
Chapter 18: Am I out of touch? Am I out of my place?
Notes:
Hi, here is chapter 18! Just to give you guys a heads-up, I am going on a family vacation for a few weeks starting next weekend. I will still be posting a chapter per week (I am nearly done prepping them all but I’ll finish doing that before leaving for sure) but I might not be able to post them consistently every Sunday at 3:15pm UTC like I have been doing. So, expect chapters to come out at a different time of the day than usual, a day early or a day late. Thank you for your patience and understanding!
Content Warnings
Underage drinking
It starts at “The table was already set.” to the end of the chapter.
Summary of what happens: Peter gets drunk on wine and tries to kiss Harry, but Harry stops him and says: “You’re drunk”. Peter freaks out because he made his friend uncomfortable, but Harry stops him and takes care of him instead, letting him sleep in his bed so he doesn’t walk home alone while drunk.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
When Peter got home, he just let himself fall onto his couch, exhausted. His hand was hurting again, but much less than it had been before, and so were his legs from all the jumping. He was lucky his stomach did not seem to be too much of an issue after being punched there hard. It was probably being overshadowed by the other things. Quite the first boxing lesson, he hoped the other would not be that intense. At least he had the week-end to recover. He put himself into a more comfortable position, fully lying down on his couch. He had been definitely right about not letting Harry sleep on it. Peter did not know how his parents had chosen his couch, but it could be a good idea to change it to get a comfier one. Peter considered it, but then had a guilty thought: that would also eliminate the excuse of sharing a bed if Harry slept over again. He felt his face burn and quickly hid it in his hands, even though there was no one to see it. God that was a weird thought, why had he thought that? Why did he want a share a bed with his friend, with his best friend even?
Peter let out an annoyed groan as he flopped his arms back down. He was always the last one to figure out his emotions. For some reason, he always had to have someone tell him how he was feeling. Why could he never figure it out on his own? It was like tonight, his boxing teacher pushing him so hard had finally made him notice the anger he was carrying around. Until tonight, he had been unaware of it. Yes, he had felt angry before, like everyone would, but he had not processed how much some of the stuff he was angry about actually impacted him. His aunt for instance, he had always told himself that he had made his peace about her, that was even what he had told Harry. So why did he feel so suddenly angry about her? Had he been lying to himself about being okay with her giving him up? That felt so selfish of him. He had a great family, he loved his parents, grandparents and uncles. It would be unfair of them to still be bitter about someone who had left him behind. He also had always trusted that she had a good reason to put him up for adoption, but was it actually the case? He did not know anything about what had happened, all of his memories of the situation had been lost because of his young age and of how jarring the transition had been.
His teacher’s words also still echoed in his head, bringing up that fear of not being able to protect Harry again, but he pushed that away. He had had enough emotions for tonight, he did not need to put himself into another panicked state. What he could not push away however was the bitter taste his outburst had left in his mouth. He really did not like it. He would have to make sure it did not happen again. Peter stayed on the couch until his back started hurting a bit and decided to finally move to his bed. He noticed Gwen had tried to call him, probably to ask him how the training went, and that he had missed a text from her. In it, she had explained the backstory she had told the guy so could Peter go along with it. Of course, it had not been Gwen forgetting or not caring enough to keep Peter informed, but him being so busy with classes and worrying about Harry that he could not notice a very important text. Great. At least he had found the text before complaining to Gwen about being left in the dark. He would call her to bring her up to speed over the week-end, he definitely did not have the energy to do that tonight.
Peter ended up waiting for Saturday evening to call Gwen, not having the energy to do it earlier. He told her that the class had gone well and mentioned how his strength still seemed to increase. As a result, it was added to the ever-growing list of things to monitor. Fun times. He did hesitate to talk about his anger but figured it was probably just a him thing, not a spider thing, and thus he did not have to share it. To be honest, Peter did not really want to talk to Gwen about it. They barely knew each other and it was rooted in such deeply personal issues. Gwen seemed mostly happy with what Peter had told her, so that was good at least. They agreed that it was smart to keep going with this type of training until Peter became a somewhat okay fighter, or until he did not have enough time to train as finals exams were less than five weeks away and he was about to become quite busy.
Monday came and seeing Harry was a nice breath of fresh air, but he seemed different. He was not his usual cheery self. As they sat at their usual seat for their first class, Harry smiled at Peter, but Peter had learnt enough about Harry to know something was off with that smile.
“Is everything okay?” Peter asked.
Harry nodded, but now he seemed nervous.
“I actually wanted to invite you for dinner on Friday.” Harry said.
Friday evening, fuck, that was when Peter had his next boxing class, so it was not a great evening for him to have dinner with Harry, obviously.
“Saturday would work better for me if you’re free then?”
Harry’s smile dropped for only a second, but it was long enough for Peter to notice it. He had said the wrong thing, again. Harry shook his head.
“I wanted it to be on Friday, but it’s fine if you’re busy, I…”
“I will make Friday work.” Peter cut him off.
He was not sure why his friend wanted him to come over on Friday evening specifically, but after their self-care week-end, he would be such a bad friend if he did not clear his schedule for him. Harry stayed silent for a few seconds. For some reason, that usually meant that Peter did say the right thing.
“I don’t want to mess up your plans…” Harry nearly whispered.
Who cared about Peter’s plans? His friend was more important. He would either ask the guy to start the training later or move it to another day, but he would figure it out. Peter smiled.
“It’s okay, really, it was nothing important.” He replied.
Harry mirrored his smile but then seemed to hesitate once again. Peter was about to reassure him once again it was really okay when Harry moved his hand, his fingers brushing against Peter’s. Peter felt a shiver run through his spine. They had touched so many times before, but this felt so oddly intimate despite the fact they were out in public and Harry was barely touching him. It just felt deeply different for a reason Peter could not figure out. When Peter looked at him, Harry was staring at his desk, as if deeply lost in his thoughts.
“It’s my mother’s death anniversary.” Harry said in a low voice as he became a little bit stiff. “I want to make her favourite dinner.”
Peter felt a sudden wave of emotions hit him. Harry wanted him to be there as he was basically honouring his mother. It was probably going to be quite a vulnerable night, but he wanted him there. That was how much he trusted Peter.
“That sounds lovely… I will be there.”
Was lovely really the right word? Did it make it sound like it was lovely that Harry’s mother was dead? Peter truly hoped not. He did not get much time to torture himself about it however as Dr Octavius came in. Instinctively, Peter moved his hand away from Harry’s. When Peter realised what he had done, it was too late. Harry had moved his own hand, placing it under the table. Peter felt bad. Removing his hand in such a way could make his friend think that he was embarrassed or ashamed to be touching him, when that was not the case, he was just not used to it. Luckily, Harry seemed to have a neutral expression, meaning Peter had not messed up too badly. Looking on the bright side of things, Peter had avoided giving Dr Octavius another reason to think that Peter and Harry were more than friends when they were absolutely not. Nope, nothing but good friends, and he did not need his lecturer thinking otherwise.
Peter was supposed to leave soon to get to Harry’s flat for dinner. His boxing teacher had luckily agreed to move their training to the following evening without Peter having to even pay an extra fee. To prepare for the dinner, Peter had gone through all of his clothes to try to find a good outfit. He wanted to wear some somewhat nice clothes to not be disrespectful or anything. Harry had not specified if it was going to be a fancy dinner or a relaxed one. However, knowing him, the food would probably be fancy but he would somehow manage to make the dinner feel relaxed. Still, Peter wanted to show him he was taking this seriously. He ended up wearing a short-sleeve shirt with a long-sleeved tee-shirt underneath, as that shirt looked the best but he was scared to be too cold. He had a nice jumper to hide the monstrosity miss-match. On his way to Harry’s Peter realised he had not bought any gift. Should he have bought one? It would have probably been the right thing, but what gift then? It was a bit late now. He could pick up flowers and not be too late, he had seen a flower shop not too far from Harry’s so it would not be that big of a detour. Peter decided to go ahead, getting to the shop right before closing and buying a nice bouquet of lilies. They were oddly shaped flowers, but the bouquet was simply beautiful with white lilies circling light-pink ones. The person who had sold them to him had assured him they would be the perfect flowers to bring to the dinner, and Peter had no choice but to trust them. As he resumed his walk to his friend’s flat, he realised he looked like he was going on a date or something. That was embarrassing… but Harry would get it. Once he arrived, he rang as usual and then made his way to Harry’s flat. He was waiting at the door, wearing his usual level of classy clothes. He looked great in them, as always. Peter felt silly compared to him.
“You bought some flowers?” Harry asked, looking at Peter a bit confused.
Peter felt his face burn a bit but nodded his head.
“Yeah, since you said you’re cooking your mother’s favourite meal and everything, I thought we could put some flowers on the table.” Peter hesitated. “For her, you know.”
Harry looked at Peter weird. Oh dear, had he messed up by buying the flowers?
“That’s a great idea. Thank you, Peter.” Harry said.
He still had that weird look on his face, but Peter decided to just smile and enter the flat. Harry followed him inside.
“I’ll put them in some water.” He said.
It took a few seconds for Peter to realise he was supposed to give Harry the flowers, which should have been obvious, but he was still a bit thrown by the face he had made and was feeling nervous.
“Right, yes.”
He handed the flowers to Harry and let him take care of them. He disappeared into the kitchen and Peter took the opportunity to remove his coat and make himself comfortable. Harry came back with the flowers in a vase that looked more like a very tall glass of water and placed them on the table. They did look pretty nice there. The table was already set. Harry was quite the host indeed, always being well-prepared when he had a guest over. Peter did notice there were two sets of glass for each of them: a regular one, and a taller fancier one. It was not a champagne flute, it was much wider. A wine glass? It seemed to have the same shape as the glasses his mother would use to drink wine. Harry must have noticed his friend’s confusion as he spoke:
“There’s this really nice wine which goes well with the food my mother liked. I got a bottle of it.”
Peter looked at him, still confused. It made sense why wine would be appropriate for the dinner, but they were still both under twenty-one years old, so under the drinking age. How would Harry get a bottle of wine? Peter thought about it for a second and then realised it was a stupid question. Harry had said he was a party animal back in high school, so he had probably drunk things with a much higher alcohol percentage than wine in the past. He was also, like Peter, very rich, which meant it was probably not that hard for him to get alcohol despite not being legally able to do so. Peter suddenly felt silly. Harry had explained the wine in such a relaxed way as if there was nothing strange about it, but there Peter was being all weird about it.
“I…uh, I don’t really drink.” Peter explained, all embarrassed.
Once again, he was being the sheltered guy, never having drunk alcohol before. Harry seemed surprised, he really should not be, but quickly offered a reassuring smile.
“It’s fine, you don’t need to have any, the food is good on its own.” Harry reassured him.
Peter was sure that was true and appreciated his friend being not weird about it, but he did not like how he was messing up Harry’s plans. True, it did not matter that much if he had wine or not, as the purpose here was to be here for his friend on this day that could be hard for him, but it felt so embarrassing.
“I can have a tiny bit.” Peter blurted out.
Harry looked at him, confused.
“Pete, it really is fine, I don’t want you to make yourself uncomfortable for my sake.”
Peter shook his head.
“No, no, I just want to see what you are saying about it going nicely with the food. I’m curious.” He replied, trying to look natural.
Harry seemed to be considering it as if he was trying to figure out if it would be responsible to give Peter a bit of wine.
“Okay, you can have a tiny bit then, but don’t get drunk just to be polite, okay?” Harry said as he gave him a serious look.
As he obviously was not planning to get drunk, Peter nodded and hoped it would be enough of an answer for his friend.
“Food is about to be ready, so you can sit, I’ll get us the wine and then get the food.”
Peter obliged, sitting down and letting his friend do his host duties. Soon enough, he had some wine in his glass and some delicious-looking food on his plate. They toasted to Harry’s mother and started eating. The food was simply amazing. Harry was an excellent cook; Peter could not believe he had made all of it himself. He completely understood why it might be Harry’s mother's favourite food.
“What was your mother’s name?” Peter asked randomly.
Harry smiled at the question.
“Emily.”
He clearly cherished that name. It was a beautiful name indeed
“Her maiden name was Lyman.” He then added.
Harry seemed to be lost in thoughts for a second, before looking like he had been jolted away by a thought.
“I’ve never shown you her ring!”
Peter shook his head.
“No, I don’t think you have.” He replied, now curious to see it.
Harry set down his knife and fork and then dug for something under his shirt and jumper. He revealed a grey chain and ring. From the colour, Peter would assume it was silver, but he was bad at distinguishing between precious metals. Harry leaned in a bit over the table and showed Peter the ring. It looked absolutely beautiful. It looked like it had diamonds incrusted in the band and looked overall quite expensive, which was not surprising considering Harry’s father's wealth.
“It was her wedding ring.” He explained. “I like to wear it on a necklace so I can have it close to me.”
Peter kept admiring the ring.
“Is it silver?” He asked.
“No, it’s white gold. So is the chain, but I had the chain made so I could put the ring on it.” Harry replied.
Right, white gold, that made sense as it was more expensive than silver. It was surprising that Harry had his mother’s wedding ring, Peter would have thought his father would have kept it for himself. Maybe his father did not want the reminder, or his mother had left it specifically to her son? Whatever the case might be, Peter was glad that his friend had it as it seemed quite important to him.
“Well, it’s absolutely stunning.”
Peter looked up at his friend who smiled, as if he was proud of the ring, but then looked a bit sad.
“I know, my mother would always get the very best of everything.” He said, slipping the ring back under his shirt and sitting back down. “She was amazing, so she definitely deserved all it.”
Peter wanted to hear more about her, she was so important to Harry.
“Oh?” He tried to encourage Harry to keep talking.
“Yes. She could be the smartest person in the room and show it without making you feel dumb. She was also so patient…” Harry sighed. “She would help me with homework, even though I had tutors to do that, and she would manage to turn it into a fun time.”
Peter smiled.
“That’s quite impressive, homework is often not a fun time.”
Harry nodded, smiling too.
“She just had this way of going about it, of framing it… She would do that with anything that might be unpleasant but we had to do. She would explain why it had to be done and then find a way to make it more fun.”
Harry took a sip of his wine and Peter realised he had forgotten to try the wine with the food. He imitated his friend, drinking the tiniest bit of wine. It did not taste great, but Peter had tasted worse. It did seem to somewhat compliment some flavours of the food.
“For example, there was this one time we had to go see this boring doctor, and to make it fun she made up a challenge where we had to say certain words during the conversation with him. Oh, Pete, you should have seen this poor doctor’s face when I looked him straight in the eyes and asked him if I was going through menopause.” Harry erupted laughing. “I had heard older women talking about it and figured out it sounded like a fancy clever word to use and my mother would be proud of me for knowing it!”
Peter laughed with him, happy to see he had such fond memories with his mother, and he was in a mood to joke about them, not cry about them. Harry told him some more funny stories about her, and then some heartwarming ones. Peter found himself wishing he had had the chance to meet her. She sounded like an amazing mother and an extraordinary person. It was truly unfair that Harry was left with his absent father and not her. When they finished their dinner after having eaten a delicious dessert, they moved to the couch. Harry was still sipping his wine, whereas Peter had already finished the tiny bit Harry had given him. The wine was not too bad actually, Peter could get used to it. It also made him feel a bit more relaxed, which was not such a bad thing. The topic of conversation had switched from Harry’s mother to the students’ teenage years in general and they had started telling each other embarrassing stories. Peter was talking about the time he had been grounded for pretending to be sick to avoid classes with his tutors.
“I swear, they almost looked disappointed when they realised that I was sneaking out to go to a robotics convention and not to meet up with someone my age!”
His parents had already told him that no, he could not skip his classes just to go to conventions, so Peter had instead taken the matter into his own hands.
“The best thing is that I actually got to finish seeing the events as they roped my Dad into speaking at them when he showed up to get me home.” Peter laughed and so did Harry. “I did, however, receive what was probably my harshest punishment for giving them such heart attacks!”
Harry was shaking his head as he tried to catch his breath from laughing so much.
“Oh Pete, I just can’t believe you did that!”
Peter smiled.
“I know, I was quite the rebel teen!” He joked.
Harry laughed harder, before giving him a look, his eyes so full of joy.
“Oh yes, such a teenage rebel. That’s so cute. ”
Pushing down his urge to either laugh or blush, Peter made an offended face, really exaggerating it. Harry did have a point, though, Peter’s stories were not that exciting. Maybe Harry would have better ones.
“Anyway, stop mocking me, it’s your turn to tell an embarrassing story, I’ve told you enough of them.”
Harry seemed to think for a second.
“Okay, but we are going to need more wine then! Believe me, it will be much needed.”
He grabbed the bottle and poured a nice amount into his own glass before emptying what was left into Peter’s. There was still much less than in Harry’s glass, but quite more than what he had first given him. Peter did not complain, sipping it, ready to listen to Harry’s embarrassing story. Harry drank a bit, but Peter had a feeling it was not doing much for him. He then took a deep breath.
“So, there was this girl I was trying to hit on. She was quite popular, a bit like a queen bee, but I was not too bad myself.” Harry said.
Hearing Harry talk about a girl made Peter suddenly feel weird, but he pushed it away, smiling instead to encourage Harry to keep going and drinking his wine.
“But she was quite… well she had high standards. I was in my douche phase, so I sort of took that as a challenge. So we spend some weeks talking and everything. I am trying to act like a gentleman and we keep on flirting and stuff. She then, out of nowhere, straight up tells me she expects me to put up the work if I want to get with her.”
Peter kept on sipping the wine, only half listening to Harry’s story. He found himself paying more attention to Harry’s hands which were moving around as he was speaking, and how he had once again rolled up his sleeves, revealing his forearms. They were really nice forearms indeed. Peter wished Harry would wrap his arms around him again. He was also looking at Harry’s smile. It seemed half forced and half amused. Peter then looked at his lips. He had admired his friend’s smile so many times, but he had never noticed how smooth his lips looked. Peter wondered what they tasted like. Would his lips make Peter feel the same way he had felt when Harry had hugged him, making him feel as if he was being wrapped by his voice? There was nothing Peter would not give to taste Harry’s smile right now. It was probably the most delicious thing on earth.
“… and so after that, she definitely did not want to kiss me.” Harry laughed.
Still looking at Harry’s lips and with his brain relaxed by the wine, Peter could not help but say:
“I’d kiss you.”
Harry looked like someone had pressed pause on him; his mouth was slightly opened and his hands were still mid-air.
“What?” He said, finally lowering his hands.
Peter blushed, realising what he had said was probably weird when his poor friend had been talking about kissing a girl.
“I meant if you were into guys, I’d kiss you.” Peter clarified.
It was probably not clarification Harry needed, but Peter was too drunk to realise that. Harry seemed to tense up a bit and Peter wondered if he had offended him. He hoped not.
“I’m into guys…” Harry finally said in such a soft voice.
Peter looked at him, a bit surprised. He should not have been, Harry had told him he had done people, not girls, that should have been a clue. After staring at his friend for a bit, Peter then realised this was his cue, his opportunity. Harry was into guys, so Peter could kiss him. That realisation made his mouth suddenly dry, and his stomach feel weird again. He could kiss Harry. He was going to kiss Harry. He slowly slid closer to Harry. Peter had never kissed anyone before, he had no idea how to kiss someone, but he wanted to kiss Harry so badly. He wanted to taste his lips, he wanted to feel him against his chest, he wanted to have Harry’s hand in his hair. He wanted all of Harry, every single little bit of him, tightly pressed against him. With his confidence fuelled by the wine, Peter wrapped his arms around Harry’s waist, pulling him against him. Harry let him do it, looking as if he was hypnotised by Peter. God, it felt so good to be chest against chest with him. It was as if Peter was hungry in a way he had never been before. As he started to approach his face to his friend’s, his eyes closed on their own. He could feel Harry’s breath, indicating he was aiming right, but he then felt Harry move away from him and place a hand on his chest as if to stop him.
“You’re drunk, Peter.” He whispered, still so close to him.
Peter opened his eyes. His friend was now looking at him, worried. That made Peter suddenly come back down to earth. What on earth was he doing?! He had been about to kiss his best friend on his mother’s death anniversary. That was so messed up, how could he have done that to Harry, to come up on him like this.
“I’m sorry, I’m…”
He quickly moved away from Harry, trying to hold in tears, feeling so ashamed. What a horrible friend he was, the worst one. Harry did not deserve this, how could he have done this to Harry.
“I’m gonna go home, I am sorry, I am so sorry.”
He quickly stood up but his head was suddenly spinning. It felt like being on a boat, everything around him was rocking to invisible waves. Harry stood up as well and wrapped his arms under Peter's arms, stabilising him.
“You’re not, not in this state.” He said in a commanding voice. “You are going to sleep here, you can have my bed.”
Peter started to shake his head, but that made the spinning worse. He now felt like he might throw up. He did not steal Harry’s bed after running the evening by getting drunk on wine.
“This is not a discussion, Peter. Come on, let me guide you.”
Harry moved and put one of Peter’s arms on his shoulder. Peter had no choice but to lean on him to avoid falling down and let Harry pull him into his bedroom. As they entered the room, Peter realised he had never seen Harry’s bedroom before. If he had not been so drunk that everything was spinning around him, Peter would have been excited and curious to see it. Harry gently let him down onto the bed and started to move and touch him. Peter was not sure what was happening, but he was now under a cover with some pillows under his head.
“It’s better if you just try to sleep through it. I’m going to leave a couple of water bottles on the nightstand and put something next to the bed you can throw up into if needed, okay?”
How did the alcohol hit Peter so suddenly? He felt like complete shit and could barely pay attention to what his friend was saying.
“’m sorry…” He replied.
He felt a hand go through his hair. That felt so comforting.
“I know Pete, I know. It’s okay, just sleep.”
Peter slowly closed his eyes, enjoying his hair being stroked. He fell asleep before he knew it.
Notes:
If you’re worried about some possible miscommunication between Harry and Peter lasting too long and creating ridiculous drama between them because the “miscommunication trope” is not your thing, do not be. I’m not a fan of having miscommunication just to cause more drama in the story. I even debated keeping this chapter in at first, but after seeing my beta reader’s reaction to it and how it allows me to make a scene (hopefully) better later on, I decided to keep it. (It also has some other positive impact on the story and characters, so I am glad I chose to keep it in.)
Chapter 19: I'm sorry
Chapter Text
As Peter started to wake up, he realised that he felt… fine? He had expected to feel sick due to a hangover, but he felt pretty much normal, just really embarrassed about what had happened. His superpowers must have really been messing with how alcohol affected him. Despite feeling physically okay, he felt so far from it emotionally. All he could think about was Harry, stuck in his arms, looking worried. He had read the situation completely wrong and made his friend deeply uncomfortable, ruined the night, and probably disrespected his friend’s dead mother. If only Peter had not drunk so much, if only he had not let whatever was happening to him take over, they could have had a nice evening, but no he had had to ruin it. Harry probably hated him now. The thought made Peter want to cry, but he pushed that away. Despite how shitty he was feeling, he still had to get up and go face Harry after having probably ruined their friendship. Why could he not maintain a normal friendship for once in his life?! Training was going to be fun tonight. Peter finally managed to convince himself to get out of bed by telling himself that he would then be able to go hide back in his flat. When he got to the living room, finding it empty, Peter did consider just leaving instead of going to look for Harry. Maybe it was the right thing to do for the both of them: Harry would not have to deal with him, and Peter would not have to face his gigantic mistake. That was quite tempting, but Peter knew that he had to go apologise to Harry if he wanted to have the slightest chance of being able to fix his mistake. He cared too much about Harry to just run away.
In the kitchen, Harry was cooking pancakes and he had set two plates on his kitchen counter. Of course, he would still make Peter breakfast after he had ruined such an important night. When Harry finally noticed him, Peter saw him tensed up and something flashed in his eyes but quickly disappeared. He then offered his guest a smile, but Peter knew his smiles well enough now to know that was a nervous one.
“Hi Pete, how are you feeling? Is your head okay? I have painkillers if you need some.”
Harry sounded so normal it made him sound abnormal. Why was he so worried about Peter, when Peter should be the one worried about him?
“I’m okay actually, I…”
“Good, good, I made us some pancakes. I figured out you would like pancakes, because who doesn’t like pancakes?” Harry cut him off, probably without even realising it.
He quickly put the plate full of pancakes on the table before grabbing a new one to put his future pancakes in. He had already set out every possible suitable accompaniment to pancakes. Peter sat down at the same place he had at the last time they had shared breakfast in Harry’s kitchen, and his host went back to making pancakes, turning his back to him. Peter looked at the pancakes, not really in the mood to eat. He was probably going to force himself to not hurt Harry’s feelings even more, but first, he wanted to address his royal fuck up. Peter took a deep breath. He had to choose his words very carefully, as it might be his only chance to make things right and he absolutely did not want to hurt Harry further.
“Harry, I want to…”
Harry spined around so fast that, for a second, Peter wondered if he had gotten superpowers too. He was now looking at Peter, quite nervously with that same fake smile. Peter cleared his throat and went for try two.
“I want to apologise for last night, I really…”
“Oh, no need, Pete.” Harry cut him off, again. “It’s okay, we don’t have to talk about it.”
Harry stayed silent for a bit, but it looked like he was thinking hard about something, so Peter waited.
“We can just move forward as if it never happened, if you want.”
Peter looked at his friend, surprised. Not having to feel bad until the end of times about trying to force his friend into a kiss when he had invited over to pay homage to his friend’s dead mother? Yeah, that definitely sounded like a pretty sweet deal to Peter.
“Okay… I mean, okay, thank you.”
He tried to smile to show he was thankful for Harry not being mad at him, but his friend spined back to take care of the pancakes before he had the chance to do so. He decided to dig into the already-cooked pancakes to show his appreciation instead. Of course, they were delicious. He had expected nothing less considering Harry’s cooking skills. When Harry finally finished cooking pancakes, it felt like he had made hundreds of them. They then ate together in silence. Harry had offered to act as if nothing had happened, but the tension in the air was still palpable. Peter hated it so much. Once they were done eating, he tried to help his host put things away, but Harry insisted on taking care of it on his own. Not having classes that day, Peter could simply go home to brush his teeth, shower and everything instead of keeping on tainting Harry’s space. He decided to do that, quickly saying goodbye to Harry.
“Uh, see you next time, I guess.” Peter said.
Harry nervously nodded his head.
“Yes, see you on Monday, Peter.”
Peter took the fact that Harry still seemed to want to sit next to him in class as a win and quickly headed back home, eager to go rot on his own couch.
On his way to his boxing class, Peter could not help but miss his couch and once again feel a wave of apprehension about what was to come. If he had lost his cool so easily the previous week when things had been okay between him and Harry, what would happen now that their friendship was in the worst shape it had ever been in. All Peter could do was to hope his teacher would not want to test his limits again. As he had done the previous week, Peter put on his ski mask and knocked at the gym’s door. The man took a few moments to open but then let him go inside and guided him to the training room. Once inside it, Peter noticed the damage he had caused to one of the walls was still there. He winced at the reminder of his loss of control. He then realised that what had happened with Harry could also be qualified as such: if he had controlled himself and had not said he would kiss Harry, Peter would have never tried to do that and would have not made things awkward. He really needed to get a grip on himself. As Peter sighed, he felt the weight of someone’s glare on him. It was his boxing teacher who was weirdly staring into Peter’s eyes. Great, someone else who looked at him if he should be studied.
“How was the dinner with the girlfriend?” The guy asked.
Peter had made up some important dinner to celebrate something with his so-called girlfriend to explain why he had had to change the day. He had figured out it was better to mix a bit of truth in his lie to not accidentally contradict it, but now he was bitterly regretting it.
“Not great, actually…” He replied, too uncomfortable already to lie.
His teacher seemed to relax a bit, not looking at Peter as if he was trying to figure him out anymore.
“You want to talk about it?” He asked in his usual emotionless voice.
Peter had to stop himself from asking the man if he wanted to know just so he could use it against him in one of their training sessions. He had already messed up things with Harry, making his boxing teacher mad at him as well was probably not a good idea.
“I just messed up…” Peter said sighing.
That is when he realised, who could he talk to about it? He would surely not tell his parents he got drunk and tried to kiss the boy he was bringing up for Christmas, Uncle Rhodey would use Harry giving him wine against him, Uncle Bruce was probably too busy to hear his depressing story, and he was still hiding Harry from Gwen.
“I read a situation wrong, I guess, and I made the wrong decision.” Peter added.
His teacher was still staring at him. Peter was not sure if he was looking bored or waiting for him to keep talking.
“And she’s mad at you now?” The man finally asked.
It felt quite weird to talk about Harry as if he was his girlfriend because 1. He was not a girl, and 2. He was not even his boyfriend, far from it. Was he being a weirdo or a creep for talking about him like that? Peter shook his head.
“No, she’s not even mad at me.” He replied, looking at his feet. “She offered that we forget about it, and just move on, but… I don’t know, I should be relieved, but I am not.”
The man stayed silent for a few seconds before taking a deep breath.
“If you still feel bad because of what you did, then it’s up to you to make it up to her. You need to show her you won’t mess up again and that she can still trust you.”
Peter looked at him. That did sound like good advice. He needed to show Harry he would not make him uncomfortable like that ever again and that they could be friends without Peter acting all weird and creepy. He could do that, he could make things better. Peter nodded, feeling thankful for the man’s advice. It felt nice to get some advice and support from someone completely uninvolved in the situation.
“Thank you.”
The guy smiled.
“No problem, now let’s get to work, okay? I would like to go home not too late.” He clapped his hands, as to signify the class was now starting. “Did you practice with the jump rope like I asked you to?”
Peter nodded.
“I did. I’m still not great at it, but I’m getting better I think.”
“As long as you’re practising and improving, I’m happy. Becoming good at something takes time. Alright, let me see your footwork, then.”
The man grabbed a jumping rope and threw it at Peter, who had to fight his instinct to duck to catch it instead. He then started to jump rope in the same way his teacher had shown him to, managing to not get his feet dangled in the rope. His teacher was paying attention to his feet with a satisfied look on his face. Peter kept going, noting that the ski mask did really make the experience feel much more miserable. Why could he not have found something a bit more breathable?
“Alright, alright, that’s enough.” The boxing teacher finally said.
Peter let out a small sigh of relief, as the soreness in his legs from jumping rope every day for extended periods of time had been starting to creep back.
“You progressed a lot. Seems like you’re a fast learner.”
This was news to Peter, he had really not thought he had made enough progress to make the man happy and had always considered himself a slow learner when it came to physical activities. He was not going to complain, though.
“Thanks, I practised a lot during the week.” He replied, still trying to catch his breath because of the mask.
The man smiled.
“And it shows. Keep doing that. I want to work on controlling your strength and your technique when throwing punches today.”
Peter tensed up. He understood it was smart to treat it as a priority as he needed to get his strength under control before he might hurt someone on accident, but he was not sure he could bear insults tonight. He was already feeling so bad and raw. It would surely lead to a disaster if his teacher used what he had shared with him earlier as part of his training.
“Don’t worry, I am not going to push you like I did last time. I just want you to figure out a nice midway point between a punch that’s too weak and one that’s too strong, and work on doing that without hurting yourself using appropriate technique.”
That made Peter relax a bit. He was grateful he was not going to have to go through the same thing that had happened last week. He was already too emotionally drained.
“That sounds good.” Peter replied.
“I thought so.”
They went to prepare Peter’s hand, with his teacher making him wrap his hands before putting them into the gloves this time. Peter was more than happy to have some more protection as he definitely did not want to end up with a seriously bruised or broken hand. Hands were quite useful when it came to studying, and there was a lot he needed to study.
“Show me how hard you think it would be appropriate to punch someone if you were defending yourself.” The guy instructed.
Peter thought about it for a second. He would need to punch hard enough to make the person back off, but not hard enough to break their jaw. Trying to control his strength accordingly, he punched the bag.
“That seemed a bit weak. Let’s try to punch slightly harder, okay?”
Peter nodded and tried to deliver, punching the bag again.
“Again a bit more…”
He repeated his punch, again adding a bit more force. His teacher smiled.
“Yes, that seems good to me. Okay, I want you to punch the bag again with the same strength, but look at how I do it.”
The man demonstrated how to throw good punches and Peter did his best to imitate it. It took them some time, but by the end of it, Peter was throwing punches at a nice rhythm and his teacher seemed satisfied with what he was seeing.
“Once again, you’re learning fast! I still need to teach you how to block punches. I would usually have you also throw a couple of punches to get used to going from blocking to punching when you have an opportunity but considering your case, I want to make sure we have your force fully under control before that. I don’t want to lose any teeth on accident.”
Knowing he could hurt the man teaching him how to protect himself without meaning to did not make Peter feel very good. He knew it was not his fault and that he just needed to be careful, but after what had just happened with Harry, Peter could not help but think that maybe all he did was hurt people by accident.
“Don’t worry, we’ll get your strength all sorted out.” The man said.
Peter looked at his teacher. He really sucked at hiding his emotions it seemed, he should probably try to get better at that.
“I know.” He replied.
His teacher patted him on the shoulder again. It was weird but somehow comforting. Maybe the guy did really have a soft side hidden under his tough boxer act. As Peter got in the ring, he could not help himself but think back to the last and only time he had been there. The man had given him a nasty punch to the stomach that had left a bit of a bruise. Peter would like to avoid getting another one, even if nobody would ever notice it. Well, he had ended up bare-chest in front of Harry twice already. Peter tried to not blush, realising that nobody had seen him like that ever since he was a kid. He quickly snapped back to reality, not wanting to dwell on that.
His teacher had already put on his own set of gloves and started showing him how to block punches as Peter tried his best to get the movements down. When the man then tried to punch him, Peter had to fight hard his instinct to duck and did his best to block instead. He missed some of them, getting punched. He really hoped it would not leave too much of a mark. On the good side of things, skipping rope had definitely helped him get used to moving more around. Instead of acting like a tree, as he did last time, he was now moving around in the ring. His teacher seemed to be happy with him since he did not throw any punch too hard.
After training for what felt like forever, the man finally called it a night. Peter was thankful for that as he was starting to get a bit tired, but not as tired as he would expect to be. He took a mental note of that and added it to his list of things to tell Gwen about. His teacher told him to keep practising jumping rope as it was clearly helping him. They then said their goodbyes, planning to meet next Friday evening. When Peter got home, he shot a quick text to Gwen about his observations. Despite the late hour, she answered quickly and told him it would be good for Peter to come over at some point so she could check all of his vitals again and take more samples of his webs to see if anything had changed. Peter had to of course accept, as she was basically acting like his doctor. Thus, if she thought that doing a check-up was a good idea, then Peter would have a check-up.
Having now updated Gwen on his weird symptoms, all that was left for Peter to do before being able to get ready for bed was to work on fixing things with Harry. As per his boxing teacher’s advice, he needed to tell him that he would not mess up again. This would reassure Harry and would help them get back to normal. Peter knew he would not manage to do that in person: he would either stumble on his words or Harry would cut him off again, or both. Thus, he was going to have to do it the coward’s way and do it over text. It was already quite late so, if Peter was lucky, Harry would already be asleep and Peter would not have to deal with his response tonight if he decided to actually not forgive Peter. Yeah, Peter was definitely going about this in the most cowardly way possible. Peter had to try multiple times to write the text, as he kept deleting what he had written. He wanted to find the perfect words so badly, but he was completely failing. He wished he could ask his mother for help, she had such a way with words. After multiple failed attempts, Peter finally managed to find the right tone, he wanted it to be clear that he was sorry but he did not want to sound too cold, and wrote the text. However, something felt off. The text was almost perfect, but it was missing something. He did not want Harry to think he was running away from him to avoid dealing with his mistake when in reality Peter still wanted to be his friend. Peter thought back to the last thing they had said to each other before Peter left Harry’s flat and found the missing piece. The text now read as follows:
Peter:Hi, I know you said we don’t have to talk about it but I still wanted to apologise for last night
I messed up, I’m sorry and I promise it won’t happen again
Thank you for being so understanding
I really appreciate it
See you on Monday
That should do the trick as Peter was clearly apologising and admitting he had done something wrong, he was promising to do better in the future and he was clearly showing that he still wanted to maintain their friendship. It would be hopefully good enough for Harry. Peter stared at the text a bit longer as something was twisting inside of his stomach. For some reason, the thought of sending the text was painful. He did not actually want to send it. Why did he not want to? He was trying to fix his friendship, why was wrong with him for not wanting to do that? Peter ignored his gut feeling, not wanting to be a complete coward or selfish when Harry definitely did not deserve that, and sent the text. Harry was apparently still awake as Peter did not have the time to start to get ready for bed before he received:
Harry:No problem :)
Well, that was odd. Peter should have felt relieved as the smiling face clearly showed that Harry was indeed not mad at him, but he did not. Had he hoped deep down for another response? If so, which one? Had he hoped that his friend was going to change his mind about the kiss? That was plain selfish and wrong of Peter. He had to accept that, whatever his own feelings might be, he needed to respect Harry’s and be a better friend to him. Trying to not get too frustrated at himself, Peter quickly got ready for bed. All of his feelings caused by some stupid text messages and the boxing class had really drained him. It had been just another great day of being Peter Stark.
Chapter 20: Happy birthday, Harry
Chapter Text
Peter was missing the touches. He was missing the small ones, when Harry would mindlessly touch him as if it was the most natural thing in the world. He was also missing the more significant ones that somewhat seemed to have a bigger meaning, like when his friend had rested his head on his shoulder or when they had hugged. He was even longing for their fingers to brush against each other. Peter had not realised how much all of those kinds of touches meant to him before they were taken away by his stupidity. However, he would never dream of complaining about it to Harry, he was already so fortunate and thankful that Harry had not cut him off because of his mistake. Peter did not let himself wonder about what it meant for him to miss those touches either. What was the point of that? It would just bring more pain and longing. It was not as if Peter had much time to wonder about such things anyway. With the end of classes and the start of the exam period fast approaching, he did not really have the luxury of wasting any time. Indeed, Peter ended up having only three more boxing classes before he got too busy and tired. Luckily, they had really made the best of those five weeks and Peter had significantly improved. He was actually quite impressed with himself, and so was his boxing teacher. He had had his check-up with Gwen, and she had found that his web’s sturdiness had seemed to stabilise. Using this new development, they had theorised that his strength and endurance were simply taking more time to reach their maximum and would at some point stop growing as well. That would not be a bad thing, really, as it would mean Peter could get fully used to his powers without always being surprised by new abilities. Peter was starting to feel very thankful for Gwen as despite the fact she was still treating him a bit more like an experiment than a human, at least she was giving him answers and monitoring his health. It could be worse.
Harry and Peter had also presented their robot to Dr Octavius. It had gone really well, with their lecturer being quite impressed by their work. It had felt good to see him so excited by what they had created, and even better to get an amazing grade thanks to that. What had felt less good was to learn that Peter had only a week to prepare for Harry’s birthday. Peter had asked him what his plans were for studying for their exams as he was hoping they would still study together. Harry had then revealed oh so casually that he was going to spend the evening of their last day of classes relaxing as it would be his birthday. Peter had nearly had a heart attack upon hearing that and thinking about how he would have missed his friend’s birthday if he had not randomly asked that question.
“We should hang out for your birthday!” Peter had quickly said, before realising he might be intruding on Harry’s plans.
Luckily, Harry had seemed to like the idea, as they had planned for Peter to come over right after their classes finished in the afternoon to have some cake which would of course be provided by Peter. They would spend the end of the afternoon relaxing before starting their study sessions on the following day. Peter was really looking forward to that nice afternoon, he had spent his week working hard on Harry’s gift. Due to not having much time to brainstorm what to gift Harry, as he wanted to make the gift himself instead of just buying him something, he had decided to go with the idea he had gotten forever ago: a star projector of some sort. Making the project itself had been quick and easy as Peter simply reused parts of his own holographic projectors. He had had to make some modifications to them so they would be better suited to display galaxies, but it had not been anything crazy. What had been harder, however, was to mix the actual pictures of galaxies with some simulations and to make it so that Harry could wonder the universe as much as possible. This had been quite a time-consuming task as, you know, the universe is pretty big. Peter had then added a bunch of information about stars, galaxies, and planets so that Harry could easily learn more about whatever would pique his interest. This had also taken quite a lot of time. Peter had had to focus on the most important, famous and interesting things, as he would not be able to add information about every single star and other celestial objects. What he had put would hopefully be enough and, more importantly, Harry would actually like it and not think it was lame or boring. Peter had also straight away put in an order for a birthday cake in the best local bakery he could find. He had decided to go with a chocolate cake as the dessert Harry had made during their previous meal together had been full of chocolate, hopefully meaning he did in fact like chocolate. Harry had quickly figured out Peter was working on something for his birthday and, despite the awkwardness between the two of them, had tried to ask him about it. Peter had to reveal that yes, he was working on a birthday gift and that yes, it was really necessary. Peter really wanted to make up for his huge mistake on Harry’s mother’s death anniversary and this was his chance. It might be his only chance, actually, so he really did not want to screw that up as well.
Harry’s birthday arrived and Peter was filled with a mixture of anticipation. He was so excited to see if his friend would like his gift, but at the same time terrified to mess up again. Before that dreadful evening, being around Harry had always been so easy and natural. Now, it felt like walking on ice that could break at any moment due to the slightest vibration. Peter really hoped the ice would thicken again and he would be able to breathe easier. When he picked up the cake from the bakery, Peter realised he had ordered one that was way too big for them to eat on their own. Oh well, it was too late to fix that and it was better to have too much cake than not enough… except when trying to ring the doorbell to someone’s flat while carrying said cake. Peter had to make use of his sticky fingers to balance the cake’s box on one hand while pressing down a button with the other. Having powers did come in handy sometimes. Still using his stickiness, Peter entered the building and made his way to Harry’s flat who, as always, was waiting for him in the hallway.
“Is that the cake?” Harry asked.
He looked surprised, probably by the size of the box, but he also seemed tensed. Peter could see it in his smile. Peter had to fight a sense of panic, suddenly wanting to apologise and beg Harry to forgive him, to smile instead.
“I did not realise it would be that big when I ordered it.” Peter said, trying to act natural.
“It’s okay, I am just happy to have cake.” Harry said as he politely smiled and moved to invite Peter inside.
Harry looked so awkward, which was definitely because of how ridiculous Peter looked with that enormous cake. Why could Peter not have just bought a regular-size cake instead of a cake that was too big and made him look weird?! He stepped inside the flat, fighting the urge to scream into a pillow out of frustration about himself.
“I got chocolate. A chocolate cake, I mean. I figured since the desert you made the night…”
Peter stopped. Why was he now mentioning that bloody night?! What the fuck was wrong with him?! Sure, let’s remind Harry how badly he had messed up because that was the smart thing to do when trying to make it up to him. Oh yes, Peter was definitely a genius, no doubt about that, and he did not want to just slam his head against a wall at all! Peter took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down before he would just lose it and run away. However, feeling Harry’s eyes on him definitely did not help him calm down. Peter made a point to not look towards Harry, knowing it would just freak him out even more.
“When we had dinner. The night when we had dinner. The dessert, that you made that night, was quite chocolatey so I thought… I am not saying it was too chocolatey, of course not, it was perfect, but I assumed that you liked chocolate, but that might have been stupid of me, cause maybe you just liked that dessert, but I…”
“Peter.” Harry cut him off mid-ramble.
Despite being interrupted by Harry, Peter still did not dare to look at him. Instead, he waited to hear if he did like chocolate or if Peter should set himself on fire.
“I do like chocolate, and I adore chocolate cakes. You made the right choice.”
Upon hearing that, Peter felt a bit relieved. It still did not fix everything else, but at least he had not messed up the cake. He nodded and went to carefully place the cake on the table, having to focus on unsticking his fingers to the box without looking weird.
“Okay, good. That is good.”
Luckily, his fingers decided to unstick without any issue. Thanks fuck for that, as it would have otherwise been the thing to throw him over the edge. Finally being able to gather the courage, Peter turned to Harry. He still had a tensed-up smile, but Peter probably had the same one.
“I also got you a gift. I made it, I mean. I made you a gift. Do you want it now or after cake?” Peter asked.
To no one’s absolute surprise, Peter had not gone to that many birthday parties. Of course, he had celebrated his and his family members’ birthdays, but he was not sure if they did them in the traditional way or not. For instance, he was pretty sure that theirs involved many more robots than regular ones. Thus, he preferred to just ask Harry instead of messing something up on accident. Harry’s smile seemed to soften a bit, looking more like it normally would. That was good, that was very good. Peter had asked the right question.
“We can have cake first as that is how I prefer to do it. However, I am of course excited to see what you made me.” Harry replied.
Peter could not help but smile a bit more naturally upon hearing that. He was glad his friend seemed to like that Peter had made him something instead of just buying him a gift. He nodded and put his backpack carefully down on the ground, as he did not want to damage the gift, and took off his coat. While Harry went to get dishware in the kitchen, Peter quickly glanced around him. As soon as he laid his eyes on Harry’s couch, Peter felt his stomach drop and the memory of how horrified Harry had looked when Peter had been about to kiss him hit him in full force. It strangely felt similar to when his boxing teacher had punched him too hard during their first lesson: Peter’s breath had been knocked out of him and his stomach was hurting. As it was an obviously unpleasant sensation and as he did not want to ruin the mood for Harry, again, Peter did his best to push the memory away. Instead, he focused on how lucky he was to be here again and how he had to keep it together for Harry. It was his birthday and he was not about to ruin that as well.
“I got us some napkins as well as chocolate cakes can be quite messy, but they are very much worth it. They’re quite similar to pizza in that regard, now that I think about it.” Harry said in a light tone as he made his way back to the living room.
Peter smiled and nodded as he did his best to appear as if nothing had happened.
“That is true.”
He took the cake out of the box so that Harry could cut it, not trusting himself enough to not make a mess. The cake was quite thick and was sure to be loaded with chocolate. On its top, in white frosting, was written “Happy Birthday Harry”. Peter had asked for that to be added, figuring it would be a nice touch. Harry looked at the cake and smiled, admiring it.
“It looks delicious, thank you for getting it.”
Peter shrugged, trying to not look too desperate or crazy as he did not want to weird Harry out.
“You can’t celebrate a birthday without a birthday cake so… I just hope you’ll like it.” He replied.
“Let’s find out if it is as good as it looks then.” Harry smiled at Peter.
Harry started cutting the cake, doing a pretty good job at it, and gave Peter a generous slice before giving himself one of approximately the same size. They both then sat down, choosing the same seats as they did during their dinner. Peter let Harry have the first bite of cake, as it would probably be impolite for Peter to eat first when it was his friend’s birthday. Harry made a satisfied face right away.
“This is delicious, Peter!” Harry said as soon as he had swallowed what was in his mouth. “You’ll have to give me the name of the bakery that made it.”
“Okay, I will.” Peter replied smiling, so happy to see his friend enjoying the cake.
Peter took his first bite and found himself agreeing with Harry. He had truly found the perfect cake, it was so good and full of chocolate without it being too strong or too sweet. Harry clearly had not lied about loving it as he was eating it as if he had not eaten for days while nodding his head.
“I’m going to get myself a second slice, do you want a second slice?” Harry asked, already cutting the cake.
Peter had not finished his first slice as he was eating slower than Harry, but felt like it might be rude to decline… and he was absolutely going to take a second slice anyway.
“Yes, thank you.”
He handed Harry his plate and got a nice big slice again. Peter was quite glad that they had not planned on eating dinner together as he would have been too full to eat anything. He was not even sure he was going to be able to finish that second slice. Harry sure did, though. He had cleared his plate again at an impressive speed which really warmed Peter’s heart. He was still working through his second slice when he noticed that Harry had managed to get some chocolate on his cheek. It was not too far from his mouth, it was not as if Harry had eaten the cake like an animal, but it was still a strange sight to see the beautiful and perfect Harry Osborn with some chocolate on his cheek.
“You have some chocolate, here.” Peter let him know, pointing to his own cheek to show where it was.
Harry straighten up. Peter was not sure if he was embarrassed or if he had been lost in his own thoughts prior to Peter speaking.
“Oh, thank you for letting me know.” Harry replied.
He reached for a napkin but stopped. Instead, he stuck his tongue out of his mouth and seemed to try to reach the chocolate with it. Peter stared at his tongue, suddenly transported back to when he had had his lips so close to Harry’s that they had been able to feel his breath. Peter probably stared at Harry’s tongue and mouth a bit too long before finally snapping out of it and looking away. He could not allow himself to think about such things.
“No, no, the other side.” Peter said, doing his best to sound normal, before looking back at his friend.
Harry smiled, clearly amused by his mistake, and switched sides with his tongue, trying to reach the chocolate with it once again, but still failing. Peter made a point to not look at his tongue for too long, not wanting to be haunted by the same memory again.
“Here?” Harry asked, smiling.
Seeing Harry wave his tongue around like a madman was too amusing for Peter not to laugh and relax a bit again.
“No, higher! You’re nearly there!”
Clearly determined to get the chocolate, Harry did his best to stretch out his tongue but was still falling short. At least he was laughing and seemed to be having fun. After letting his friend struggle for a bit, Peter decided to grab a napkin, not wanting Harry to hurt his tongue or jaw by acting like an idiot.
“It’s too far for you to reach it.” Peter said.
Without thinking much of it, as he just wanted to help his friend, Peter stood up from his seat and leaned over the table. He started to rub the napkin on Harry’s cheek, focused on not rubbing it too hard and hurting him but still hard enough to get the chocolate off.
“Here, I got it.”
Peter smiled, happy to have been able to help out his friend. He then backed up a bit, to see Harry’s whole face instead of just his cheek and make sure he did not have more chocolate on his face. Harry looked as if he was holding his breath and was staring at Peter strangely. Oh no. What had Peter done now? That was when it hit him, how close their faces had been again and what he had just done. Friends would not rub each other’s cheeks like that, no, it was the stuff you would only see in those corny romantic movies. Not only had Peter invaded Harry’s personal space, which was a big no-no after having nearly kissed him while drunk, but he also had pulled a romantic move on him as if he was trying to flirt with him. How could Peter be such an idiot?! He had promised Harry to not make him uncomfortable again, just for him to do this on their first hang-out together since the incident. Why could Peter not be a normal person for once?!
“Sorry, I’m sorry, I did not mean to…” He apologised as he started to panic.
Oh god, he had messed up so badly, Harry was never going to forgive him for acting like this again. Peter tried to quickly back away, his flight instinct definitely kicking in, but he felt something tugging on his wrist and stopping him from moving. Trying to breathe normally to prevent a panic attack, Peter looked down at his wrist to see a hand wrapped around it. It was Harry’s hand, Peter realised. He had been so starved for his friend’s touch that he felt a chill go down his spine. Harry was touching him. Harry had his hand wrapped around his wrist. It was tightly wrapped around it, even. Shamefully, Peter wished he had worn something with short sleeves, despite the cold weather. He mentally reprimanded himself for having that thought. He could not wish for that, it was not right.
“It’s okay.” Harry said softly but still did not let go of Peter’s wrist.
Why was he not letting go? Peter was obviously not going to complain, as he was enjoying the physical contact, but he could not understand why Harry was still holding on to him when he had stopped moving.
“Okay…” Peter replied, not sure what else to do.
Harry finally let go and Peter sat back down. His cheeks were feeling a bit hot and he would not dare look at Harry.
“Sorry, I did not mean to be so aggressive.” Harry said.
Peter shook his head.
“You were not, it’s fine, I just freaked out a bit.”
They stayed silent for a bit. Peter could not figure out why, but the air felt heavy around them. It was probably because of him messing up again, meaning that he needed to fix it quickly before it festered and it became worse. Taking a deep breath, he looked at Harry, who was staring at his empty plate.
“You want more cake, or should I give you your gift?” Peter asked.
He gave Harry his best awkward smile, hoping it would alleviate some of the tension. It did, as Harry looked up and smiled excitedly.
“I am ready for your gift!”
That made Peter feel a bit more relaxed. He stood up, grabbed his backpack, and took the poorly wrapped gift out of it.
“Sorry about the wrapping, I suck at wrapping gifts.” He said.
Oh, and also the fact that his hands had decided to become sticky again for no reason while he was trying to wrap the gift had not helped.
“It’s fine, I’m excited to see what you’ve made.” Harry replied as he took the gift from Peter.
Harry started to unwrap the gift, struggling a bit because of the egregious amount of tape Peter had used. As he watched his friend unwrap the gift, Peter started to feel nervous and had to fight the urge to shake his leg. He was really hoping that Harry was going to like it and it was not going to be a total flop. Should he have prepared a backup gift? That would have been a good idea. If only he had not been so focused on making that gift. Harry finally managed to unwrap the gift and stared at it before turning it around as if he trying to figure out what it was.
“Is it a projector of some kind?” He asked.
Peter nodded.
“Yes, it displays galaxies, here, let me show you.”
He quickly pushed a button, making sure to not touch any of Harry’s fingers in the process, even if he had really nice hands. After a second or two, they were surrounded by constellations of stars and other celestial objects. Harry quickly looked all around them with wide eyes.
“Wow, that’s… Just wow.” He said, seeming not to know where to look.
Harry quickly put down the projector on the table and leaned back in his seat, as if he was trying to take everything in. This seemed to be so new to him, had he never had a projector like that before? Harry had loads of money and these kinds of projectors could be quite useful when working on projects, even for biology research, so he would have surely bought something like that before. However, the look on his face told a different story. He seemed so mesmerised.
“You made this?” He asked, before adding in a higher-pitch voice “For me?”
“I did, but you did not leave me a lot of time… So, I did my best with the time I had.” Peter laughed.
It seemed like the gift Peter had made was a hit. He let himself sigh in relief.
“It looks better when you’re lying down. You can really feel like you’re looking up at the sky and you get a wider view.” Peter said as it seemed like an important piece of information.
Harry looked at him for only a second before getting up and grabbing the projector.
“Let’s do that then.” He said.
That did not sound like a suggestion, but more like an order. It reminded Peter of when Harry had taken his hand to check for injuries after he had grabbed a flying skateboard. Peter had learnt that there was no point in arguing with Harry whenever he would use this tone. He followed his friend and blushed when he realised they were going to his bedroom. Peter’s stomach felt weirdly tight. It made sense to go there, as they would be able to comfortably lie down, but it once again reminded Peter of that fateful night. Peter did not let himself think about it for too long, knowing he would ruin the mood if he did. Harry lay down on the bed, leaving Peter the side on which he had previously slept. Once Peter had lied down, still trying to fight off some blurry memories and leaving quite some space between him and his friend, Harry put down the projector between them.
“You were right, it is even better.” He said, sounding amazed.
Peter could not help but feel proud. He had managed to impress Harry and it felt great.
“You also have some settings you can change. You can choose where to be in the universe, you can choose if you want a stationary view or wander through the universe and at what speed.” Peter explained, showing Harry how to access the setting by manipulating parts of the hologram. “You also have the usual display settings, with the brightness and that kind of stuff, but I put it on what should be the most optimal ones.”
Harry did not reply, just staring at the projections.
“If you see something interesting, you can grab it like this to see some basic information about it. Peter added, grabbing what Harry had been looking at to show him how to do it. “Obviously, I couldn’t put information about every single thing, but I did my best to cover the most important things.”
“This is amazing.” Harry said, looking at all of the information now being displayed.
He then looked at Peter in a way that made him want to stop breathing. It was as if Harry was staring deep into his soul, like how he used to do before.
“Thanks, Pete.” He added.
Peter felt like an even bigger weight being lifted off of him upon hearing Harry calling him by his nickname. It was quite funny, in the beginning, he had hated it, but now it felt so comforting and soothing. It was okay, they were okay.
“I wasn’t sure that you were going to like it, but I was really hoping that you would.” Peter hesitated for a few seconds but then decided to keep going. “I had a projector like that one as a kid, but less fancy. I still have it, actually. My Dad made it when I was still having trouble adjusting to living with them. We would lie down under the stars, and he would tell me cool stuff about them until I fell asleep. For some reason it made me feel safe, so I thought that, maybe, it would have a similar effect on you? I know, it’s weird, but…”
“No. It’s not weird.” Harry interrupted.
His voice was soft in a way that made Peter crave to be hugged by him. He was also gently looking at him, somehow? Maybe he was finally completely forgiving him for his mistake. Peter really hoped so. That was all he really wanted, to be fully forgiven by Harry.
They lay, looking at stars, for a while without speaking. The projector was in a slow cruising mode, letting them discover different parts of the universe. It did not feel as entirely relaxed as it used to, but it still felt much better. The ice beneath Peter’s feet had definitely thickened. He was not sure how much time had passed before he got hungry. It must have been a while, as his stomach had gotten pretty full with the two slices of cake. Peter did not really want the moment to stop, enjoying Harry’s company too much, but he knew that soon enough his stomach would get so loud they would not be able to enjoy it anyway. Might as well avoid a more awkward situation by speaking up now.
“I should probably go home. It’s getting late and we need to start studying tomorrow.” He said.
Harry stayed silent. Peter thought he might have not heard him or had fallen asleep, but as he was going to repeat himself, Harry finally spoke:
“Are you sure you’re going to be okay walking home on your own this late?”
Was Harry worried that Peter might get beaten up again? He was not sure if he should appreciate his concern or be offended, as he would definitely not get beaten up this time around.
“I don’t live that far and it’s not that late, so I think I should be okay.” Peter replied.
After his boxing teacher’s jab, Peter getting beaten up was a sour spot for him. He still had not gotten over it, despite the fact it had been weeks. Hopefully, he had not sounded too harsh.
“Okay, let me walk you to the door then.” Harry said before getting up.
Peter did the same and went to gather his things before sliding his backpack onto one of his shoulders. As they got to the flat’s front door, Harry gave him a small smile.
“Thank you for the cake, for your gift, and for coming over, Pete. I had a really good time.” He said.
This was music to Peter’s ears.
“No problem, I had a really good time too. You’re coming over tomorrow at 9am, right? So we can start studying early.” Peter asked.
Harry nodded.
“Yes, so make sure you’re already fully awake, so I don’t have to drag you out of bed.” He chuckled.
“Sir, yes, sir.” He replied with his smart-ass tone as he smiled.
This time, Harry let out a laugh, a proper one.
“At ease soldier.” Harry said, shaking his head while smiling. “See you tomorrow, Pete.”
“See you then.” Peter said, smiling too as he left his friend’s flat.
Chapter 21: I hate your father
Notes:
Hi, here is chapter 21, and guess what? We’re finally at the winter break! Yay! My plan was to have the first and second semesters be around the same size, with the winter break between them acting like an intermission of some sort. However, that was before the first semester ended up being just over 80k words. The winter break is also becoming longer than expected, so I have no idea how long the second semester will be. I do have a road map for it, we are not flying blind here, I have just now learnt to expect things to end up longer than originally planned.
Chapter Text
Studying for exams sucked, even with Harry around. It did make things better, as they would motivate and help each other and Harry would cook quick but delicious dishes, but it still sucked. A lot. In the beginning, Harry would arrive at Peter’s place at 9am sharp every morning, study with him the entire day, and then leave at around 11pm so he could sleep and shower at his flat. After a few days of following that routine, they had ended up agreeing that it would be more efficient for Harry to just stay at Peter’s place, and sleep and shower there. It had eliminated some unnecessary back and forth between their flats which in turn had left Harry more time to sleep, making him more efficient during their study session. Peter was not going to lie, it had been a bit awkward sharing his bed with Harry again. Things were not nearly as tense as they previously had been, but things still lingered between them. Strangely, Peter doing his best not to accidentally touch Harry while sharing a bed with him had kept reminding him how much he was missing his touch and had brought up all of his unresolved feelings up to the surface. How weird. One thing that had warmed Peter’s heart a lot was how Harry would turn on the star projector every single night as they got to bed. Even if it was for only five minutes before falling asleep from exhaustion, Harry would turn it on and stare at it for a bit. He would never skip a single night. Peter had at first thought that it was just Harry trying to act grateful for his gift but something in his expression had then told Peter he did actually want to do this. After seeing how much his friend actually liked his gift, Peter had made himself a mental note to try to improve it when he would have more free time, meaning after their exams.
Speaking of exams, Harry and Peter had both worked hard and had managed, by some miracle, to do seemingly pretty well on their exams. They had not received their grades back yet, of course, but they were both feeling good about their performance. The exam period had finished late in December, leaving them only a few days to get to Malibu before Christmas. Harry had gone back to his flat right after the last exam to pack for their trip. It had been weird for Peter to go from having Harry around all day for an entire week, to being left all alone. Luckily, it had been for barely over a day, and soon enough, it was time to go pick him up for the Christmas vacation. Peter was so excited. They were going to be able to enjoy the holidays together and Harry would not be alone and would even meet his family. They were going to have a good time for sure. However, Peter had warned his parents not to bring up or ask about Harry’s family. Peter did not really know what was going on, but he had figured out it was a sensitive topic, which was kind of obvious. He did not want to hurt or make his friend sad by accident, hence the warning. Based on how his parents were talking about having Harry over, Peter was pretty hopeful that everything would go well… as long as Uncle Rhodey kept his promise.
The day they were set to leave for Malibu, a car came to pick Peter up at his flat. He got his things into the car, which did not take too long as he had lightly packed. Well, he had not packed that lightly when taking into account Eri, but someone had come to pick her up already to make sure she would get on the plane safely. Peter cared so very much about her and wanted to make sure she would not get damaged while flying. Once Peter was in the car with all his things, they set course to where Harry lived so they could pick him up too. When they arrived, Peter got out of the car and went to the door to ring, figuring he would go help Harry with his bags. Peter waited for a bit, but there was no reply. That was weird… He rang again, hoping his friend was okay and had not forgotten that they were set to leave this morning. This time, the door opened after a few seconds. Peter made his way to the lift, and soon enough he was at Harry’s floor. His door was still closed, so he gently knocked.
“Hi, Peter.” Harry’s head popped out, with the door opened just wide enough for his head to go through and nothing else. “I will be with you in a second, okay?”
Multiple things felt off about him. Firstly, he seemed stressed. Why would Harry be stressed, had he not finished packing? He was too organised for that. Secondly, he did not use Peter’s usual nickname. Ever since his birthday, Harry had started to use it again, practically never calling Peter by his actual name. Thirdly and lastly, he definitely did not want his friend to come in. Peter was about to ask what was wrong when someone else spoke.
“You’re not going to let your friend come in? That’s not how you treat a friend you're so close with that you’re going to spend Christmas with his family. I've raised you better than that.”
Peter saw pure panic in Harry’s eyes, something he had never seen him experience before, but it disappeared nearly as quickly as it had appeared. Raised you? Was his father in his flat? Peter tensed up. As Harry let him in, Peter observed him. Harry seemed as scared and hurt as he had been that night when Peter had to comfort him. Maybe worst. Harry did not look like himself, instead, he looked like a scared little boy. He seemed stressed out of his mind. Seeing his friend like this was too much for Peter, especially when the person responsible for hurting him was standing right next to them. He was not going to put his life and sanity on the line to protect Harry just for some pathetic excuse of a father to come and hurt him. Fuck that.
“Hello young man, I am Harry’s father. And you are?”
Peter turned his attention to the older Osborn. He could see where Harry had gotten his sense of style. Osborn had a very nice suit on, which was probably very expensive, but not overly flashy, unlike the suits that Peter’s father liked to wear. He was also smiling, but it felt empty, as if it was only for appearances.
“Peter, sir. Peter Stark.” He replied, trying to keep his tone completely neutral.
“Stark. Ah.”
Norman Osborn looked at his son who was closing the flat door. He seemed… amused? Peter was not sure if he was reading his expression right. What he was sure of, though, was that Osborn had recognised his last name.
“I heard about your father. Quite the… family legacy you have.”
Right, Peter had talked to enough people to know that was a jab. Good thing he knew how to deal with people who were pathetic enough to try to use his father’s reputation against him.
“Thank you, sir. I am very proud of it.” He said, still trying to keep his tone and facial expressions neutral when inside his anger was bubbling and he was doing his best to remember his boxing teacher’s advice.
Osborn made that same face, somewhat amused, somewhat something else. Whatever it was, Peter was ready to hold his ground.
“My son told me he was going to spend the break with you and your family.”
Peter simply nodded, not sure yet what the man was getting at, and not wanting to act too hostile and fuck things up for Harry. Peter looked at the older Osborn’s face, still trying to figure out what the man was thinking. It would be nice to be able to predict if he was about to try to take another jab at Peter’s family, or if he had enough with just one. Osborn’s face was too neutral to read, but Peter did not doubt that Osborn was definitely managing to read him just fine. Peter glanced at Harry instead, knowing he would have more luck evaluating the situation by looking at his face. He seemed really on edge and even gave Peter an apologising look. There was definitely another jab coming, then. As the older Osborn stepped closer towards him, he reverted his attention back to him, keeping as much as possible his neutral face. The man got in his personal space, puffing his chest as if he was trying to tower over him.
“You and your family better not go and mess up with his head. I am his father, I know what is best for him, and I have heard of your so-called father. How on earth did people think he was fit to take care of a child is beyond me.” Osborn basically whispered, making sure Harry could not hear.
Oh, Peter was about to throw hands. He could feel his anger rise even more, begging to take over him. If it was not for Harry, he would absolutely deck that man. In the past, he would have probably broken his hand doing so, but now, he was sure that he could manage to break his jaw with a well-placed punch. And Osborn would totally deserve it. He would not let anyone talk about one of his parents like that or make Harry look so frightful. No one. However, despite how satisfying and so well deserved it would be, Peter could not just hit him. Harry would never be able to come for the holidays, he would probably not be allowed to ever speak to him again and Peter would lend his own family in a world of trouble. He had to use his words instead. He better make sure to land a good punch with those. Fighting the urge to take a good deep breath, trying to act unbothered, Peter looked straight into the man’s eyes and raised an eyebrow.
“Oh, do not worry about that, sir. Unlike you, my father is a good, loving and present parent. He will make sure to show Harry how an actual father should act and treat him.” He whispered back.
As a finishing touch, Peter offered him his most innocent smile, not breaking eye contact. Finally, the man’s façade dropped, even if it was for just a second. He was pissed. Good, let him be pissed.
“Have fun, Harry.” Osborn said loudly enough for his son to hear him this time. “We will talk when you get back.”
Harry’s father finally broke eye contact as he stepped forward. Peter did not move, he was not going to let himself get intimidated by him or get pushed around, causing him to get shoved in the shoulder by the man on his way out of the flat. Harry and Peter silently waited a few seconds after the door closed to ensure the man was out of earshot.
“I’m sorry about him, I don’t know what he said to you but…” Harry started to say, walking quickly towards him and clearly embarrassed.
“I’m sorry, Harry, but your father is such a dick. He’s a complete asshole!” Peter cut him off.
Harry sighed.
“That’s my father for you. A well-dressed, powerful, asshole.”
Peter looked at him surprised as he was still not used to him swearing. It was the second time now. Hopefully, Peter was not rubbing off on him, even if he did not swear that much himself… right? Looking at Harry, Peter realised he still looked quite far from okay. He had his shoulders slumped forward, as if trying to make himself look small, and had a sad look in his eyes. Peter wanted to make him feel better. How could he do that? Peter tried to think of what had worked on his friend before. Harry did enjoy physical contact, especially hugs, so that was probably a good bet, but Peter felt too awkward to just hug him. It also felt wrong; they still had their no-touching rule in place. Still, it was the only way Peter knew how to comfort his friend.
“Do you need… a hug?” He decided to ask.
Harry looked at him surprised. He did not look mad or weirded out, so at least Peter had not crossed a line by offering this.
“Yes…” Harry whispered, looking down, before walking towards Peter.
Peter opened his arms, and Harry simply fell into them. Peter tightly wrapped his arms around him, remembering that was how he seemed to like his hugs. Harry basically melted inside of his arms, letting himself be held. He clearly needed it. So did Peter. The pressure against his chest was so comforting, it was as if he had been struggling to breathe for days and was finally able to take deep breaths. Harry buried his face against Peter’s neck, making a shiver go down his spine. Peter could feel his friend’s hair brushing against his skin. God he wished he could kiss him on the head, giving him all the affection he clearly needed right now, but he could not do that. That would be too much. Instead, he whispered:
“It’s okay Harry, it’s okay.”
Slowly, Harry wrapped his arms around Peter, pulling them tighter together. Figuring this was probably a good sign, Peter kept whispering the same things to Harry’s ear, hoping it was indeed soothing him. Still, he wanted to do more. Hugging him and repeating the same phrase over and over again did not seem like enough. Peter wanted to tell Harry all the things he needed to hear, but he had no idea what those were. Once again, Peter felt the urge to kiss his hair, showing him that he was valued despite what his father might have made him believe, but that would be crossing the line. Peter was not allowed to kiss him, no matter if it was on his lips or on the head. With those limitations, all he could do was to keep holding him and hope it would be enough.
“We should probably go; we don’t want to be late.” Harry said.
Peter was not sure how much time had passed, but he knew he did not want to let go of his friend just yet. It was too comfortable to let go.
“I mean, since it’s my family’s plane and all, I'm pretty sure they have to wait for us to get there”
That made Harry exhale more air than usual, making Peter shiver again. Peter had to fight the urge to try to hold him even tighter.
“Pete…”
“I know, you’re right, it is rude to make everyone on the plane wait for us.” Peter sighed.
Despite very much not wanting to do that, he let go of Harry who also unwrapped his arms from around him and stepped back. He seemed somewhat less sad but still did not have his signature smile back. Peter really hoped that, one day, he would get to tell Harry’s father how much of a piece of shit he really was. Until then, he would have to bite his tongue and just be here for his friend. Peter helped him with his bags. He had way more than Peter’s but that made sense as he was not going home but leaving home. Once everything was loaded into the car, they made their way to the airport and arrived on the plane at the scheduled time. They were not as early as Peter had planned for them to be, but at least they were not late, so that was a win. Peter checked on Eri to see if she had been properly packaged and secured. After doing a thorough inspection and being certain she was going to be okay, Peter went to sit with Harry and soon enough they were up in the sky. They had a long flight ahead of them; it was supposed to take them just over six hours to get to their destination.
To keep busy during the flight, Peter had decided to watch a movie, The Martian, on his laptop as Harry was reading a book next to him. He had nearly reached the end of the movie when Harry tapped him on the shoulder. Peter jumped a bit, as he had not expected that, but paused his movie, took off his headphones and looked at his friend. Harry had put down his book and was looking at him.
“Sorry, I did not mean to scare you.” He said.
Peter shook his head. Yes, Harry had definitely made his heart skip a bit, but that was not his fault.
“It’s okay, did you want something?” Peter asked.
He hoped that had not sounded rude or like Harry was bothering him, of course, he was not, Peter just wanted to know what was up. Harry slowly nodded.
“What did my father say to you?” He asked, looking straight into Peter’s eyes.
Harry’s piercing blue eyes were back. It was as if he was trying to read Peter’s mind.
“What…?”
He had forgotten how unsettling it could be to be looked like this. Or had it become even more intense now that they actually knew each other? Harry seemed to notice that he was making Peter uncomfortable as he used a softer tone:
“He whispered something to you, before leaving, what did he say?”
Peter hesitated. He did not want Harry to feel bad because of what his father had said. He also did not want to tell him about his father claiming to apparently know what was best for him when he clearly did not. That felt gross, somehow. On the other hand, was it really Peter’s place to hide those things from Harry? Would it not be just protecting his father? Peter definitely did not want to do that. He also remembered the last time he had tried to lie to Harry, that had not felt very good.
“Nothing too bad, don’t worry.” Peter replied, giving his friend a small smile.
It was true, it had been nothing that Peter could not handle.
“Peter, please…”
Harry was looking at him with a pleading look. He really wanted to know. Was it eating at him? Maybe it would be worse to let his imagination run wild than to actually tell him.
“He said bad things about my father.” Peter sighed. “It’s fine, it was nothing I haven't heard before. I am used to it.”
Should Peter tell Harry that he had practically told his father to fuck off? No, it would probably only worry him.
“People usually talk badly about your father to your face?” Harry asked, looking like a mix of confused and surprised. “I hadn’t realised that’s what you meant when you told me people would rant about him to you.”
Peter looked at him, now confused as well. He slightly tilted his head to the side.
“What did you think I meant?” He asked.
“I thought they would tell you about how lucky you were, how amazing your father is, that kind of thing.” Harry shrugged. “That’s what they usually tell me, that I’m so lucky to be Norman Osborn’s son, that he must be an amazing father, that he’s a genius, and so on.”
“Really?”
Harry nodded as Peter looked at him, perplexed.
“I mean they do that sometimes too.” Peter said, squirming in his seat a bit. “I do get the whole ‘you’re so lucky’ thing when I bump into a fan of his instead of someone just mad at him, but you never get people that are mad at him?”
“No, I do not.” Harry replied, shaking his head.
“Right.”
It was quite ironic. Peter absolutely loved his father and was so proud of him, but had to sometimes endure people saying bad things about him. Whereas Harry who had a relationship that was obviously not full of love with his father would only hear positive things about him. That must suck as well… Would Harry actually prefer hearing bad things about his father than how lucky he was to be his son? Peter was not sure that would be an appropriate question to ask him, especially since they had a fight earlier that morning.
“I’m sorry you have to deal with that, Pete. I’m also sorry about what my father said to you, even if you’re used to it.” Harry said, looking at him.
This was the first time someone had told Peter they were sorry he had to deal with people saying hurtful things about his family. It was not like his parents or family could, as they did not know about it as Peter had made sure of that. So, who else could have told him this? Peter had not expected those words to hit him that much, for some reason they did. They did not remove all of the pain he had felt hearing people say bad things about his parents, but having someone recognise the pain eased it a bit, somehow.
“Thanks.” Peter hesitated for a second then kept talking. “I’m sorry you have to deal with your father and people telling you how great he is and stuff.”
Harry seemed to appreciate it as he gave him a small smile. For just a moment, Peter would have believed that the night he had gotten drunk had never happened. It was as if the tension was finally clearing.
“How much time do we have left before we land?” Harry asked.
Deciding to not comment on the fact Harry had completely changed the subject, Peter quickly checked the time. He knew at what time they were supposed to land, so he just had to do a quick subtraction to be able to answer Harry’s question.
“A bit over four hours still, so we have quite some time left.”
“Okay, thank you.”
Harry did not pick his book back up but did not start talking again either. He was simply looking around, seemingly bored. Peter would have offered for them to eat lunch now, but it was probably a better idea to wait a bit longer so they could then try to have dinner with his parents. Indeed, there were those lovely time zones to consider.
“Do you want to watch a movie or something?” Peter offered instead.
His friend looked at him, before glancing at his laptop.
“You haven’t finished the one you were already watching.” Harry pointed out.
“It’s fine, I will finish it another time.” Peter shrugged.
“Are you sure you don’t mind?”
Peter smiled and nodded. That seemed to convince Harry enough, as they moved seats to sit in front of the TV. They spent a bit of time trying to find a movie that would suit both of their tastes, before settling on a Sherlock Holmes movie, figuring it should not suck too much. They both enjoyed it, starting to eat lunch around the movie’s midpoint. After finishing the movie, they decided they might as well watch the second one, as they just had enough time to do so. They ended up finishing it just mere minutes before it was time for them to get back into their seat to put their seatbelts on to prepare for landing.
As they were on their way to the Stark villa, Peter noticed that Harry was sitting straight in his seat, with his shoulders looking a bit tensed. Peter wanted to tell him he had no reason to worry or to give him some comfort but did not want to overstep. They were finally getting back to normal again, and he did not trust himself to not act weird.
“You’re okay?” He decided to ask, figuring it that should be fine.
Harry nodded before giving him his signature smile. Peter felt himself blush and quickly looked away. How did it still work on him?
“It’s going to be just us and your parents for now, right?” Harry asked.
Peter knew that he was going to have to look at his friend when answering him, as he would seem rude otherwise. He took a deep breath, trying to hide it by nodding, and then looked back at Harry.
“Uncle Rhodey might join us for dinner if he has the time, but that will be pretty much it as he works a lot. I don’t know yet if Uncle Bruce will come at some time.” Peter explained. “Oh, and there will be Jarvis and some robots, but Jarvis won’t bother you and the robots are in my father’s workshop, so…”
From Harry’s puzzled look, Peter figured out he had forgotten to explain who Jarvis was.
“Jarvis is an AI created by my father. A bit like Eri, but more advanced and not put into an actual robot. He helps my mother run the company and helps my father with his projects. He would even sometimes help me with homework and other things… He’s basically everywhere in the house and you can ask him for help whenever. Don’t worry, he’s nice.”
“That sounds…” Harry said but did not finish his sentence, staring into space instead.
“It’s really like having a super smart butler, assistant, teacher and a friendly presence all in one, but without an actual body.” Peter summed up, hoping it would help Harry have a better grasp of who or what Jarvis was.
For Peter, having Jarvis around was the most normal thing ever. He was part of his family, and it would be weird to be home without him, but he could understand how something like Jarvis might seem strange to Harry.
“Right, I can picture that a little bit better.” Harry said.
The car stopped, meaning they had arrived at the villa. Peter looked at Harry. He still seemed tense, but Peter probably could not do anything to help with that now.
“You’re ready?” Peter asked.
Harry took in a deep breath, nodded and then got out of the car. Peter quickly followed suit. They let the chauffeur take their bags out of the car, thanking him on their way inside.
“Oh honey, I have missed you so much!”
Peter’s mother was already wrapping her arms around him, not letting him even get out of the entryway. He was not complaining though, quite on the contrary. He let himself get squished against his mother and embraced her back.
“I’ve missed you too, Mom.” Peter replied, feeling all of his worries magically disappear.
It was as if someone had just massaged all his knots out of his muscles and his constant headache had finally disappeared. He had not realised how much he had been needing to be held by his mother.
“Come on, Hon, leave some of it for me.”
Upon hearing his father’s voice, Peter felt like he would explode if his father did not hug him as well, right now. However, he did not want his mother to let go of him. So, instead, Peter did his best to grab his father to pull him into the hug.
“Easy, kid. I am here, okay?” His father said.
Peter felt instant relief when he felt his father’s arms also wrapped around him. God, he had missed both of his parents so much. Peter would have wished to remain like this forever, protected by both his mother and his father, but Harry was probably standing next to them quite awkwardly. He would get other opportunities to be glued to his parents later over the break. Peter gently tapped his father’s shoulder and then his mother’s, which made them slowly let go of him.
“You must be Harry.” Peter’s mother said, offering Harry her hand to shake. “We’re so happy to have you joining us over the holidays.”
Harry seemed surprised, but Peter was not sure why. He took Pepper’s hand and shook it, before doing the same with Tony.
“I’m very grateful to have been invited.” Harry replied.
“Come on, you’re Peter’s friend, of course you’re welcome here.” Peter’s father said, patting Harry on his shoulder.
It was really weird for Peter to see his parents interacting with his friend, but it did seem to be going well.
“Thank you, sir.” Harry said.
“God, you’re making me feel old, call me Tony.”
“You can call me Pepper too, no need to be formal. Should I show where you your room will be? I’ll show you your way around the villa as well.” Pepper offered, smiling to Harry.
“Okay.” Harry nodded, but he still seemed tense. “And that would be great. Thank you, Pepper.”
Peter was starting to worry all of this might be a bit much for his friend. It would definitely be for him. Meeting any new person could be tough, but it was even more scary when you were supposed to stay at their house for weeks. That was a lot of pressure to deal with.
“Do you want me to come with you?” Peter offered.
Harry shook his head but then gave him a look. Peter felt like his friend was expecting him to be able to read it, but Peter was not sure what it meant.
“I’ll be okay, Pete.”
That made Peter’s father raise an eyebrow, staring at his son with a curious look. That look was probably because he knew his son hated that type of nickname. They were going to have an interesting conversation for sure. Peter smiled at Harry and watched him being led away by his mother.
“What’s up, Pete?” His father asked in his smart-arse tone, still staring at him.
Peter fought the urge to tell him to shut it, knowing it would just encourage him even more.
“Harry seems to really like that nickname, and I don’t want to be mean, okay?” Peter shrugged, trying not to sound too defensive.
His father still seemed really amused by it.
“Alright, alright, Pete.”
Peter groaned, knowing his father would probably use it as a recurring joke now.
“I’m teasing, kid. Let’s get yours and your friend’s stuff to your rooms while your mom shows him around.”
They grabbed the bags and made their way to the bedrooms.
Chapter 22: Finally home
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Peter’s bedroom was near his parents’ as he had never changed bedrooms since he was a kid and that had been what had made sense back then. When it came to guests, who were mostly Uncle Bruce and Uncle Rhodey when he would decide to stay the night, they would usually also stay in a bedroom not too far away from his parents’ and Peter’s. However, that was not the case for Harry. Peter’s parents had put him in a bedroom quite far away from theirs, which was a bit weird. As his father and he went to Peter’s bedroom, Peter wondered why they would do that. Maybe it was so he could have some breathing space as he was not used to being around them all the time? That would make sense and be quite nice of them. Once in his room, Peter started unpacking the few things he had brought with him while telling his father all about his semester. He told him about his classes and his lecturers, but more importantly, he told him about Dr Octavius and how much fun he had had working on the project for his class. His father asked questions and made remarks, clearly interested in what Peter was telling him. That felt good, Peter loved how his father would let him rant about nerdy things and seemed to actually enjoy it. His father would even let Peter talk his ear off as he worked on his own projects, which always meant a lot to Peter. He knew he could be fully himself around his father, no matter if he was in the mood to monologue or not say anything at all for hours.
“Seems like you killed it, kid. I’m proud of you.” His father said.
“I haven’t gotten my grades back yet.” Peter pointed out, trying not to blush.
His father looked at him for a second, before pulling him again into a hug, patting his back.
“Still, I’m proud of you.”
Peter enjoyed the hug for a bit, the soothing effects from their first hug being still present.
“I love you, son.” His father whispered.
He had clearly missed Peter a lot. Peter had missed him too for sure. It had been the first time since his adoption that they had spent so many months apart. Peter felt his heart ache thinking about how he was going to have to leave his parents again when the winter break would come to an end, but it was not time to think about that yet. He had barely arrived, he needed to enjoy being home without worrying about what the future may bring.
“I love you too, Dad.”
His father let go of him, patting him on his back again. Sometimes, Peter wondered if he did that more to comfort himself than Peter.
“So, tell me, how did you meet Harry, again?” He asked, sitting on the chair at his son’s desk.
Peter sat on his bed as there were no other chairs. He had told his parents about Harry and how they shared classes on the day they had first met. That had only been four months or so ago, but it felt much longer than that. So many things had happened since, Peter had gotten superpowers, he had learnt how to fight and duck things, he had nearly ruined his friendship with Harry and now had Gwen as his doctor. At the same time, so little had happened: his attempt to get proper evidence on the shady experiments he had witnessed had failed, he had not made a new attempt since then and Harry was still working there, completely unaware of what was happening.
“We met on the first day of class.” Peter explained. “Harry sat next to me, and we just started talking.”
Obviously, Peter did not really want to tell his father about how Harry had to basically follow him around and keep asking him to hang out for them to become friends. That was too embarrassing.
“Uh, you guys just started talking.” Peter’s father repeated, looking at his son with an eyebrow raised as if he did not really believe what he had just told him. “Well then it’s lucky he chose to sit next to you then, isn’t it?”
Peter nodded. “Lucky” was not really the right term, but he did not want to get into that either on his first night back.
“He seems like a bright young man.” His father then added.
“He is.” Peter replied, smiling.
Harry was really bright. His work on their robot had been clear evidence of that, and Peter had also been able to see it when they had studied together. Harry was quite smart, no doubt about that.
“His father must be really proud of him.”
His father had said that in such a relaxed and casual way, but Peter could see him looking attentively at him. He had looked at Peter like this enough times for him to now spot it a mile away. He was trying to see if his son was following what he was saying. Peter had told him to not bring up Harry’s family as it might hurt him, but here was his father doing so. It was not to be mean or annoying though, he did not have the face he would have when he would decide to be a pain in someone’s butt. No, it was as if he was trying to figure out something, maybe if Peter knew who Harry’s father was and how he felt about him. Why though? Did they know each other or something? Based on how much Osborn had seemed to dislike Peter’s father, he would not be surprised.
“He should be.”
Peter had probably sounded a bit angrier than he meant to, but at least his father would know that yes, he did know who Harry’s father was, and no, he did not like him very much.
“I have no doubt about that.” His father replied.
He seemed somewhat angry as well, but there was something else as well. Peter was not sure what, though. He decided to not ask, not wanting to let the older Osborn sour their Christmas break any more than he already had. Peter’s father seemed to share the sentiment, as he got up, saying:
“Let’s see if your mother is done with showing your friend around.”
Peter nodded, eager to get back to his friend, and followed him out of the bedroom.
The rest of the afternoon went on pretty normally. Peter, his parents, and Harry had a nice conversation in the living room. They talked about Peter’s and Harry’s time at MIT, Tony’s time at MIT and other funny stories about their life. At some point, Pepper started talking to Harry about her job as Stark Industries’ CEO. Harry seemed to know a lot about how to run a company, so much so Peter started to wonder if his father had made him take classes about it or something. He would not be surprised based on how controlling Osborn seemed. Still, it was impressive, and Peter could not help but look at him in awe, even if he did not understand half of what Harry and his mother were talking about. Due to the jet lag, Peter started to get hungry before it was really time to eat. Luckily, his parents had foreseen this and had told Uncle Rhodey to join them as soon as he was done with work so they could have dinner early. Peter felt both excited, he had missed his uncle quite a lot, and nervous, unsure of how intimidating his uncle would act around Harry. However, as soon as Uncle Rhodey set foot in the villa, all of Peter’s anxiety went away as he rushed to his uncle.
“Uncle Rhodey, I’ve missed you!” Peter said, hugging him.
“I’ve missed you too, Peter, it’s so good to see you again.” Uncle Rhodey replied, firmly hugging his nephew. “Did you play sports or something while at MIT? You seem stronger somehow.”
Peter had no idea how Uncle Rhodey had noticed that from their hug as he had made sure to not hug him too tightly.
“No, not really no.” He replied, trying to not look suspicious by focusing on the fact that he was telling the truth. “But I did work on a robot for one of our classes, and it was pretty heavy. Maybe I gained some muscles by having to turn it over all of the time?”
“Well keep working on heavy robots, Peter. You can never be too strong.” Rhodey replied, seemingly believing him.
Uncle Rhodey let him go and Peter stepped back, noticing that Harry had also risen from the couch, awkwardly waiting near them.
“You’re Harry?” Rhodey asked, looking up and down at Harry.
Peter held his breath, knowing that the first impression Uncle Rhodey got of Harry would be crucial. He was suddenly very glad he had told his friend all about Rhodey and why he was so defensive of him.
“I am, sir.” Harry politely replied. “It is nice to meet you. Peter has told me good things about you.”
Harry had a perfect smile, but not his signature one. It was a softer and more polite one. It was probably the one he would use during galas or when meeting important people. He was also carrying himself differently, standing straight but not seeming tensed. Uncle Rhodey stayed silent, staring at Harry for what felt like an eternity as Peter held his breath, waiting to see if Harry had made a first good impression or not.
“Anyway, Peter, you need to tell me about everything you did at MIT. I hope you were serious and that you worked hard.” He said, leading Peter towards where Peter’s parents were sitting by putting a hand on the back of his shoulder. “Pepper. Tony. Nice to see you guys.”
Uncle Rhodey had not embraced Harry with the same warmth that Peter’s parent had, but at least he had not tried to scare him off or threaten him. In Peter’s book, that was a big win. He would rather have Uncle Rhodey ignoring Harry during their time at the villa than have an actual conflict between the two.
“Nice to see you too Rhodey, it has been too long since the last time you had dinner with us.” Peter’s mother replied, standing up.
“It has, but you know how work has been keeping me busy.”
“Don’t worry, bud, you’ll be eligible for retirement soon enough.” His father chimed in, standing up as well and patting Uncle Rhodey on the back.
“Says the guy who has been retired for more than a decade and a half!” Uncle Rhodey snapped back, clearly offended.
“Well, technically, I was not retired but a stay-at-home dad until Peter went off to MIT. Sorry if my wife is a super-hot...”
“Tony…” Peter’s mother interrupted him as she gave him reprimanding look
“And super-smart and super-capable CEO and I wanted to spend time with our kid.” He finished. “Better, dear?”
Peter had not realised until now how much he had missed his family bickering. It was always so entertaining to watch and he knew it was coming from a place of love. Home did not feel like home without some smart sassy remarks. Harry, however, seemed to not be enjoying them. He was looking tense making Peter wonder if he had not realised the two men were not having an actual argument. Feeling the need to reassure him, Peter moved as discretely as possible to stand next to him and whispered:
“Don’t worry, they’re just playing around, they’re not fighting.”
Harry noticeably relaxed, confirming Peter’s suspicion, before slightly nodding.
“Okay, okay, boys. It isn’t that you two arguing about the correct term to describe Tony’s occupations isn’t very entertaining for all of us, but I think Peter and Harry are probably quite hungry now and would like to have dinner.”
His mother glanced towards him, and Peter made sure to enthusiastically nod to support her claim. Hell yes, he was hungry. He was more than hungry, he was starving. This seemed to do the trick and they were finally able to go to the dining room. Peter helped to bring the food to the table and then sat in his usual seat. His mother would always sit at the end of the table, with Peter and his father on either side of her. It made lunches less awkward with this configuration, as his mother would more often than not have lunch at work, leaving his father and him to eat together. Uncle Rhodey also had his designated seat which was next to Peter’s father. This left Harry sitting next to Peter where Uncle Bruce would sit when visiting. It felt a bit weird for Peter to have Harry next to him, instead of Uncle Bruce, but he was glad his friend was eating dinner with his family next to him. Peter was hoping it would help Harry feel more comfortable. Once everyone was served and they had started eating, Uncle Rhodey spoke up:
“How did your exams go, Peter?”
Peter was not surprised that Uncle Rhodey was asking him about his exams, he would always be so proud of how hardworking and bright Peter was, or at least how much he was according to him.
“Pretty well, I think.”
Like Peter had told his father, they had not received their grades back yet as they had barely finished their exams so he did not want to oversell his performance. Still, they had not gone too badly, so that seemed like an appropriate response.
“That’s good.” Uncle Rhodey replied, nodding his head and clearly satisfied.
Thinking back on how the exams went and how he had prepared for them, Peter realised he had an opportunity to try to paint Harry in a good light to Uncle Rhodey.
“Harry stayed over so we could study together, so that really helped.”
Peter gave a quick smile to Harry, who gave him one back, before looking back to Uncle Rhodey who was now definitely not smiling. Oh no, what had Peter said wrong?
“What do you mean, stayed over?” Uncle Rhodey asked, looking quite unpleased at what Peter had said.
Oh, oh no. Fuck, Uncle Rhodey could absolutely not know about Peter sharing a bed with Harry, even if they had done so only as friends. He would definitely not see it that way and it would ruin any chance of the two getting along. Peter had somehow managed to hide some of the truth from Uncle Rhodey in the past, even if it had been terrifying, he had to do it again.
“Oh, you know, we would meet every morning and then he would stay over for the entire day so we could study together.”
Technically, Peter had not lied: they would meet every morning – just either in bed or in Peter’s kitchen – and Harry would spend the entire day at Peter’s – he just did not leave when evening came. Peter really hoped he had sounded casual enough to not tip his uncle off that he was trying to mislead him and had to resist the urge to look at Harry to try to ask him to go along with this less-than-clever obscuration of the truth. Harry was probably smart enough to understand what Peter was doing and why he was doing it. Instead, he kept eating his food as if nothing stressful had happened.
“Right.” Uncle Rhodey did not sound that convinced, but Peter knew that if he did think they had shared a bed for basically a week, he would sound much angrier. “I hope this was beneficial for the both of you.”
“It was.” Peter replied, nodding his head.
This seemed to somewhat satisfy Uncle Rhodey, who now had more of a neutral face. However, Peter could feel someone staring at him. He quickly, but discretely, looked around to see his mother watching him with a soft smile. Peter wondered what this was about, but knew better than to ask in front of everyone. His mother was really good at reading people, so Peter feared what would be her answer to any question he might ask her concerning her smile. He would rather keep his questions to himself.
After Peter had answered all of Uncle Rhodey’s questions, his parents and uncle became the ones mostly talking, and the rest of the dinner went on okay. Soon after its end, both Peter and Harry decided to call it a night and go to bed early. It was not a great idea to go to bed that early, as they would probably want to do the same thing the following day and it would be Christmas Eve, but between travelling, the jet lag, them still recovering from exams, and their encounter with Harry’s father, they were both exhausted. Peter said goodnight to his family and to his friend and went to get ready for bed in his bedroom and ensuite bathroom. It was going to be great sleeping in his bed again, he had really missed it. It was not like he did not have a nice bed back in Massachusetts, he obviously had, and yes it was also his, but it still felt different. His bedroom, and thus his bed, at the Malibu villa was by far his favourite, even over the one he had in the tower in New York. He had always felt more at home in Malibu than in New York. He had never really wondered why that was before, but if he was to guess now, it was probably because Malibu was where he had first lived after getting adopted. No matter what the reason was, Malibu was his home… but it was not Harry’s. Maybe one day, if they stayed friends through and after their studies, it could become like a home to him, but it was not yet. Today had been his first day ever here. Peter still remembered his first day at the Stark’s villa, it had been so scary, and he had felt so alone. Was it how Harry was feeling now? True, Harry was not a child, but new places could be intimidating for adults as well, especially when there were new people to go with. Peter should probably check up on him before he went to sleep to make sure he was feeling okay.
Once in pyjamas and ready for bed, Peter made his way to Harry’s room. He did not care that his friend would see him in embarrassing Iron Man pyjamas, not after he had seen him bare-chest twice, one time with even a face mask on and dye in his hair. Further away, Peter could hear his parents and uncle talking and laughing. They were probably in the living room, having a good time. It was far too early for them to go to bed, so it made sense, but also meant Peter did not risk running into one of them and having to explain that he was going to check if his friend needed to be comforted. That would have been way too awkward and they would have probably gotten the wrong idea. Peter did not want them to think he was sneaking around to go share a bed with Harry, no thank you. Once at Harry’s bedroom door, Peter gently knocked.
“It’s me.”
He had spoken not loud enough to wake up his friend if he was already sleeping, but still loud enough to let him know who was knocking so he would not get worried.
“Come in.” Harry replied.
So, Peter did, closing the door behind him. Harry was also in his pyjamas, but in his fancy pyjamas, not in embarrassing ones like Peter had, lying on the bed and looking up. Stars were all around him, slowly moving. The projector he had made for Harry as a gift was on the bed, not too far from him, and was obviously what was displaying the stars. It took Peter a few moments to process what he was seeing and what it meant. After using it every single night when he had been sleeping at Peter’s, Harry had brought the projector with him, in one of his suitcases, and had decided to put it on tonight again. Peter was not sure why, but it felt like something deeply meaningful.
“I was going to watch the stars for a bit before sleeping, did you want something?” Harry asked, raising the upper half of his body using his elbows.
Peter snapped out of his thoughts and cleared his throat, suddenly feeling quite vulnerable in his silly pyjamas.
“I just wanted to ask you if you were okay. I know new places can be hard, new people too, and after this morning, I…” Peter sighed, realising he was rambling. “So yeah, how are you feeling?”
Harry moved to a fully seated position and taped on the bed for Peter to sit next to him, which he did.
“I’m okay, I think. You’re right, it can be overwhelming, but I’m hanging in there. I’m used to meeting new people, and your parents are lovely. Even your uncle treats me better than my own father despite clearly not liking me.” Harry mumbled that last part to himself. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”
“It’s fine.” Peter shook his head.
His friend was allowed to express his feelings, even negative ones, and Peter wanted to hear them. He wanted him to know it was okay for him to open up about things, that also meant being open to Harry about things. Thus, Peter should probably tell him about his conversation with his father.
“I think my father knows your father.” He said.
“Oh?”
Harry was looking at him, but Peter could not tell what he was feeling.
“He did not actually tell me he knew him but… he seemed to not like him and it would make sense with what your father told me.” Peter explained.
“I would not be surprised.” Harry shrugged. “They probably went to the same galas and met there.”
Peter nodded. It was the most logical explanation, and thus probably what had happened. Not that much drama behind it, and Peter’s father was treating Harry well despite any possible contentions he might have had with his father, so there was nothing for them to worry about. Harry lay back down fully, watching the ceiling where a galaxy far away was displayed.
“Does your family usually have a special meal for Christmas Eve, or only on Christmas day?” Harry asked without looking at Peter.
“We have a really fancy dinner on Christmas Eve, and then a more relaxed lunch on Christmas day. This tradition probably started because of me being so excited about my gifts as a kid that I wouldn’t even change out of my pyjamas on Christmas day as it would take time away from them.” Peter laughed, a bit embarrassed about what he was saying.
Harry stopped looking at the stars, to instead focus on Peter. He had that smile that would make Peter feel weird and would make him want to look away but could not.
“Did you have Iron Man pyjamas back then too?”
“Oh, shut it, okay?” Peter snapped back, feeling his cheeks burn, but that made Harry laugh.
Peter looked away, trying to recompose himself. When he looked back at his friend, he was once again staring at the ceiling. Peter had made sure that Harry was feeling okay, so his goal here was done, but oddly enough, he did not want to leave just yet. Instead, he lay down next to his friend, deciding to watch the stars a bit as well. He had worked hard on this after all, he could enjoy it a bit before going back to his room, Harry would not mind. As Peter watched the stars, he felt the guilt of misleading Uncle Rhodey during dinner creeping back in. He pushed it back down, knowing that Uncle Rhodey would have made a mountain out of a molehill, but then, another thought hit him. He had involved Harry in his mess. He would have to be very vague or even lie if he was asked about it. That was not fair to him.
“I’m sorry for skirting around the truth during dinner and possibly putting you in an awkward spot. I just didn’t want them to get the wrong idea.”
“It’s fine, Pete…” Harry whispered.
Harry must have been wanting to watch the stars quietly, as they would do when they would share a bed, so Peter decided to keep quiet after that. He watched the stars and galaxies go by, feeling his body relaxed. He could hear Harry’s breathing, but he was not sure if it was because of the silence or because of his weird abilities. Either way, he found himself matching it. It was comforting, somehow. So comforting, that Peter started to fall asleep.
“Peter, you need to go back to your own bed.”
Something touched him softly on the shoulder and Peter jerked back to being fully awake. He was not sure if he had actually fallen asleep, or if he had been about to, but he knew Harry was right. If he stayed any longer, he would end up spending the night here.
“Sorry, have a good night.” He said while getting up from the bed.
“You too.”
Harry had sounded half asleep, meaning it was definitely time for Peter to leave. Trying to be as quiet as possible to let Harry fall back asleep, Peter exited the room and made his way back to his bedroom. Right away, he noticed he could not hear his parents talking downstair with Uncle Rhodey anymore. Had they gone to bed already? Would it not be too early? He had not stayed in Harry’s room that long, right? As Peter got closer to his room, he finally heard them. He stopped, trying to stay hidden in the hallway that still had its lights shut off by positioning himself against one of the walls. They were further away in the hallway closer to the rooms.
“… seems like a nice boy.” His mother said.
“He does, I’m glad…” His father replied before shutting the door.
Upon hearing the door closing, Peter leaned a bit forward to see that the door was fully closed. Perfect. Peter advanced, trying hard to not make a sound, and finally reached his room, eager to just fall asleep already.
Notes:
I feel like I need to add a bit of a disclaimer just in case: I love Rhodey, and in this story, he loves Peter so much and tries to be the best uncle he can be for him. However, nobody is perfect, and this is true here too. Peter is not perfect, he can make mistakes, and so can all other characters that appear in this story, so please just keep that in mind and be patient with the characters.
Chapter 23: Santa Claus is comin’ to town
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
“Hi, honey, did you sleep well?”
Peter had missed being greeted by his mother barely thirty minutes after waking up, just the time to get the courage to get out of bed when he did not have classes or anything planned for the morning. Seeing her face light up as she saw him get down from the stairs and walk towards the living room where she was sitting was also great. It really made Peter feel loved and appreciated by his mother.
“I did.” He replied still half asleep, sitting next to her on the couch. “Did you?”
“I slept very well, thank you.”
His mother smiled at him, and Peter suddenly could not resist scootching closer to her on the couch, smiling when she wrapped an arm around him. As he finished fully waking up, enjoying his mother’s warmth, Peter realised he could hear someone moving around in the kitchen. He felt his stomach drop as he thought back to the monstrosity his father had created the last time he had tried to make them breakfast.
“Dad is not…” He whispered to his mother, trying to not already feel sick.
“No, no, god no.” His mother replied, laughing. “You know I wouldn’t let him do that to you today when we have such a nice meal planned for tonight.”
Peter let out a sigh of relief. His stomach still felt weird, but at least he knew he was safe.
“It’s Harry. He’s making us breakfast.” His mother whispered to him as she smiled.
That surely did the trick, Peter did not feel nauseous at all anymore.
“Is he making pancakes?” He asked, trying to keep his voice down.
God, he was really hoping Harry was indeed making pancakes as Peter would finally be able to enjoy them properly, without any guilt stifling his appetite like he had the only time Harry had made them before.
“He is.”
“Oh my god, yes, his pancakes are amazing!”
“Mmm… Really?” His mother asked as she rearranged his hair.
She sounded weird and was either trying to get him to relax or doing her best to look busy, why? Wait, was Peter not supposed to know about Harry making good pancakes? Would it suggest that he had had breakfast with Harry which in turn would suggest they had spent a night in the same flat? Peter tensed up. No, people could eat pancakes at other times than at breakfast, right? Or Harry could have brought them over with him when they were studying at Peter’s. It was fine, no need to freak out, it would only make his mother suspicious about things that did not even happen.
“Pancakes are ready!” Harry’s voice called out from the kitchen.
Being eager to eat some delicious pancakes but also to get out of a possible awkward discussion, Peter rushed to the kitchen. Harry was bringing two plates full of pancakes to the kitchen counter where he had already set the cutlery, meaning only the toppings for the pancakes were missing. As soon as Harry’s eyes landed on Peter, he smiled, which made Peter also smile in response.
“Good morning, Pete. I’m glad you’re up, you’re right in time for pancakes.”
“Hi, yes, I got lucky it seems.”
Peter grabbed the toppings and placed them down on the counter, before sitting down, ending up between his mother and friend.
“Should we wait for Tony?” Harry asked.
“No, he’s already working on something downstairs.” Peter’s mother replied.
That was not surprising, Peter’s father's sleep schedule was famously messed up. Peter did still hope his father had managed to get some sleep and would be able to enjoy the evening without having to feel the effects of being sleep-deprived.
“Okay, let’s dig in then.” Harry said.
They started eating and, immediately, Peter could not help but let out a satisfied groan. The pancakes were even better than he had remembered them to be. How could one make pancakes that good, it was plain and obvious wizardry.
“Peter was right, your pancakes are indeed delicious, Harry.”
Peter nodded along, his mouth too full for him to try to agree verbally, and looked at his friend who was… red? Harry’s face was red. Was he blushing?! Had Peter seen him blush before? His face had looked quite red when he had seen Peter wearing his jumper, so he had probably been blushing then too.
“Thank you, I…” Harry seemed a moment to need to find his words, which made Peter wonder more about what was happening. “I can make some more while I am here if you’d like.”
“That would be very generous of you, but you’re on break, you need to rest too.”
“It’s fine, I enjoy making them.” Harry replied, shaking his head.
“Oh yes, Peter told me you enjoy cooking.” Peter’s mother said, softly smiling.
Harry started to talk about what he liked to cook, encouraged by Peter’s mother who was asking him questions about it. Peter quite enjoyed listening to them talk about something Harry was passionate about as he ate his delicious pancakes. Once they were done eating, Peter put the plates, the cutlery and what Harry had used to cook into the dishwasher.
“Should I bring Tony some of the left-over pancakes?” Harry asked. “I know that he’s working, but it might be good for him to have a little snack so he doesn’t get hungry until it’s lunchtime.”
“I’m sure he won’t say no to pancakes, just be careful on your way down, there might be things scattered around. Here, take this with you as well.” Pepper said, giving Harry Tony’s favourite topping.
Grabbing the plate of left-over pancakes and what Pepper was handing him, Harry nodded and then made his way down to where Tony’s workshop was. Peter finished cleaning up, thinking back at how red his friend had looked when Peter’s mother had told him about Peter praising his pancakes. Had Peter’s praise meant that much to him? Why? Harry was quite passionate about cooking, so he might just really enjoy people praising him about it. However, Peter had no idea what had unsettled him so much and why he could not get Harry’s bright face out of his head or rather, he really did not want to know what it might mean.
“He’s a really sweet boy.” Peter’s mother said.
“He is.” Peter nodded.
His mother once again softly smiled, looking towards the stairs Harry had used to go see Peter’s father, before straightening herself and looking back at him.
“Time to give him the jumpers, so he can wear one of them tonight if he wants to.” She said.
Peter smiled. He was excited to see Harry’s reaction to them, hopefully he would like them. Peter’s mother quickly walked to the living room where she had hidden the jumpers in the drawer of one of their piece of furniture. They were covered in Christmas-themed wrapping paper, but Peter had already seen a picture of them when his mother had received them a few weeks ago. Being nosey, Peter had of course followed her to the living room. As they heard Harry coming back up the staircases, Peter’s mother rushed to put the packages behind her back to not ruin the surprise.
“Harry, dear, can you come to the living room for a moment?” Peter’s mother called. “I have something for you.”
The first thing Peter noticed when Harry joined them in the living room, was how big his smile was. It was huge! Peter guessed that his father had probably also complimented Harry’s pancakes or something like that for him to return so happy.
“I know Christmas is tomorrow, but I wanted to give you this morning. Happy early Christmas.” His mother said, handing Harry the package.
Peter watched Harry taking the gift, after having thanked Peter’s mother of course, before sitting down and unwrapping it. Inside the wrapping paper, there were two red jumpers made of wool with “Harry” written on their front in green. Peter had been able to tell his mother what size to get for Harry thanks to that jumper of his which was still in Peter’s possession. Peter was definitely not planning on giving it back to Harry, as it was bringing him way too much comfort for him to give it up. It did not matter anyway, as it seemed like Harry was more than happy to let him keep it. Anyway, Peter had obviously not told his mother how he knew Harry’s size, and she had not asked. It was not really time to ponder about what she would have said or thought if Peter had told her, as Harry was looking at the jumpers, seemingly confused.
“We all have Christmas jumpers.” Peter explained. “My parents, Uncle Rhodey, Uncle Bruce and me. We wear them during Christmas dinner.”
“Oh…”
“Those jumpers normally have ‘Stark’ on their back, even for my uncles, but we did not want to be disrespectful or something… But at the same time, we did not want to single you out, so, we got you two. One has ‘Stark’ on the back, and one has ‘Osborn’ instead.” Peter said, probably speaking a bit too quickly. “My mother took care of ordering the jumpers and everything. She’s the one that thought about getting you one, actually.”
Peter did not want to steal his mother’s thunder by accident. She had been the one in charge of the jumpers and who had the idea of ordering two, she was the one who deserved recognition. He had had to tell her Harry's last name so she could take care of the jumper, even though he had planned for his parents to just find out once Harry showed up for Christmas, but she had hopefully stuck to her promise to not snoop. Harry slowly picked up one of the jumpers and turned it around. It was the ‘Osborn’ one. He then put it back down, picking up the second jumper instead and turning it as well. He was staring at the ‘Stark’ written on it, looking weird. Had they offended him? Peter hoped not.
“You…” Harry’s voice broke and Peter felt panic himself start panicking. “You got this for me?”
Harry was looking at Peter’s mother, so Peter let her reply.
“I did, sweetheart.”
Before Peter could be surprised she was calling Harry that, Harry let out a sob, quickly followed by others. Tears were falling down his cheeks as his shoulder shook. He was crying. Harry was crying and Peter did not know why or what to do to help his friend.
“Oh, sweetheart, come here.”
Peter’s mother wrapped her arms around Harry, who did the same while still holding the jumper.
“It’s okay, just let it all out.” She said as she sat down next to Harry on the couch and started to rock him.
Harry kept crying, now also gripping Peter’s mother's clothing as if he was holding on for dear life. Peter stayed frozen. He wanted to try to comfort his friend, even if he was not sure what was happening to him, but Harry seemed to want to be comforted by Peter’s mother, not by him. Peter looked at his mother for guidance, who simply nodded her head and mouthed “Go”. Figuring out she knew what was doing, Peter quietly backed away and went to his father’s workshop, to leave his mother and Harry the privacy they needed, so he could check on ERI while keeping his father company.
Peter stayed in his father’s workshop until lunch. He would alternate between watching him work and working himself on something. Now that he had some free time, Peter was working on ways to improve Harry’s projector. Having his father around to brainstorm ideas about how to do that also did quite help. Two heads were indeed better than one. At some point, his mother had sent him a text to let him know that he could come back up whenever he wanted, but he figured he would let her and Harry have some time just the two of them. Peter had been thinking about what had happened and had figured out that his mother embracing Harry and making him feel like part of the family had reminded him of how much he was missing his own mother. Had he had anyone treat him like family since his mother’s death? His father had obviously not given him the familial love everyone needed, and it did not seem like he had any other family left, so probably not. If that was indeed the case, no wonder getting included in a family tradition had made him so emotional. Maybe that was also why he had been so nervous during their ride to the villa? Maybe that was why Peter’s parents complimenting his pancakes had made him so happy? Whatever the reason was, Peter was going to make sure that Harry felt like part of the family and the familial warmth he clearly needed.
When lunchtime came, Peter’s mother sent a text to his father to say that she and Harry were ready to eat lunch. It was a bit weird that she had sent a text only to his father, not to him as well like she used to do when they would work together to maximise the chances of one of them seeing it quickly enough. Peter figured it was probably because she was now used to only texting her husband when she needed him to come out of the workshop now that Peter went to university. This made him feel a bit sad. It was silly, as it made sense, but he could not help but feel like he had been erased of their part of their life. Peter pushed the feeling out of his mind, knowing it was unfair for him to feel like that when he had been the one to leave them behind, and went up to the living room with his father. His mother and Harry were sitting on the couch, speaking enthusiastically. Peter felt a wave of relief to see Harry smiling again. They were both wearing Christmas jumpers, but Peter could not tell from where he was standing which one Harry had chosen to wear.
“Should we go put on our Christmas jumpers, kid? We need to give those guys some competition, look how good they look in theirs!”
Harry did look really good in his jumper. Red was not a colour he would usually wear, or not a red that bright at least, but it did really suit him. It made him seem more lively, somehow. They would normally put on their Christmas jumpers later in the day, but Peter’s mother and friend were already wearing them, so it should be fine, right?
“Sure…” Peter replied, cringing a bit had what his father had said.
“Great.” Peter’s parents seemed to share a look that Peter had no idea what was about, but it lasted only a second before his father patted him on the back. “Can you go get them, please? I’m going to text Rhodey to put his own before he joins us for dinner tonight.”
Peter nodded, but before going to get them, he looked at Harry as he wanted to make sure he was fine. Harry smiled and gestured with his head for him to go get them, so Peter did, going quickly upstairs. He grabbed his own from his room, then went to his parents’ room to get his father’s, knowing exactly where he kept it. He then rushed back down, where his parents were weirdly glancing at each other again. Now, even Harry had a strange expression on his face, looking like a kid trying not to laugh in class. Something was definitely up, and Peter was apparently the only one who did not know about it. He looked at Harry, hoping his friend would take pity on him and at least give him a hint as to what was going on, but Harry looked away, smiling even more. Great, his parents were scheming and they had somehow managed to get his friend on their side. Peter knew he should have not left Harry alone with his mother for that long, they were meant to get along. Trying to control his face to not look like a pouty child, as he did not like being the only one left in the dark, Peter gave the jumper to his father before putting on his own.
“Let’s take a picture, shall we?” His father said.
“Uncle Rhodey is not here yet, should we not wait for him?” Peter pointed out.
“We’ll take one with him tonight, don't worry, honey.” His mother replied.
Right, cause it was totally normal to take a picture when lunch was supposed to be ready and with a key member of the family missing. Peter’s parents were far from being as smooth and sneaky as they probably were hoping they were being.
“Okay…”
Peter knew better than to argue; when his parents had something prepared, nothing would stop them from executing their plan. His father told him where to stand, positioning himself and his wife in the middle with Peter and Harry on either side of them. As Harry went to stand in his designated spot, Peter was finally able to see the back of his jumper. Peter’s heart skipped a bit when he read the name on Harry’s jumper: Stark. Harry had chosen the jumper with Stark written on it instead of the one with Osborn. Peter was not feeling surprised, not exactly, as it made sense for Harry to pick that one after what had happened with his father and with him naturally wanting to be liked by Peter’s family. Peter could not say what he was feeling exactly, but he knew it was somehow a mixture of what he had felt when he had seen his friend scared of his own father and what Harry running his hand through Peter’s hair while they shared a bed had felt like. That was a really weird combination of feelings as the situations that had caused them were vastly different, but it was what Peter was feeling.
“Honey, it’s time to look at the camera.” Peter’s mother whispered in his ear.
Right, they were about to take a picture. His father had finished setting everything up so Peter could not really keep on staring at Harry. Peter pushed away his feelings and the confusion they brought, focusing instead on trying to have an okay-ish smile for the picture. As Peter was starting to feel like an idiot just standing there with what was probably the most awkward smile on planet Earth he felt the back of his neck tingle which then propagated down his spine. Something behind him was moving towards him. Different reflexes fought to take over his body. Should Peter duck, like he had learnt with Gwen? Should he move aside, like his boxing teacher had taught him? Or should he go with a newish one, partially taught by his boxing teacher and partially awakened by Harry’s father, and punch whatever was about to attack him? Peter found himself spinning around, not knowing if he was about to duck or punch whatever threat was coming at him, only to be face to face with… Uncle Bruce?! Oh god, no, no punching Uncle Bruce!!! Trying to process what was happening and to stop a possible punch, Peter lost his balance.
“Peter!”
Uncle Bruce tried to grab him, but Peter landed on his butt on the floor before he had the time to.
“Uncle Bruce?!” Peter said, somehow still trying to process what in the hell just happened. “You’re here! You’ve made it home for Christmas!”
Peter jumped up from the floor, throwing himself at his uncle. Peter did not need to try to understand how or why his uncle was here, all that mattered was that his uncle was here with him.
“I’m really happy to see you too, Peter, but can we ease up a bit on the hug, please?.” Uncle Bruce said, sounding slightly in pain.
Was Peter hugging him too tightly? Shit, he should be more careful with his strength: first Uncle Rhodey noticed he got stronger, and now he was hurting Uncle Bruce on accident. Peter loosened up his hold on his uncle but kept him in his arms, way too happy to see him to let go.
“Are you okay? Did you hurt yourself falling down?”
“I’m okay, Uncle Bruce, I’m okay.”
“So, what do you think of your Christmas gift, kid?” Tony asked, placing a hand on Peter’s shoulder
Right, he had asked to see Uncle Bruce as his Christmas gift. With everything that had happened, he had completely forgotten about it. As always, his parents, and uncle, did not disappoint.
“I’m so happy! How long are you staying for, Uncle Bruce?”
“I leave on the evening of the twenty-seventh because I have to go back to monitor some experiments, but we have some time until then.”
They had around three days and a half. Peter could live with that; it was way more than he had hoped for anyway. They would have time for Uncle Bruce to tell him all about his research, time for Peter to tell him all about his semester, his lecturers, his robotics project and his friend, Harry. Harry… Right, Harry was here! Uncle Bruce was going to be able to meet him! Peter let go of his uncle, stepping back and instead took carefully his arm to not hurt him.
“Uncle Bruce, you have to meet Harry!” Peter said, eagerly pulling him towards his friend. “Harry, meet my uncle, Bruce, and Uncle Bruce, meet my friend, Harry.”
Peter was trying hard to not start jumping around, so excited at the idea of the two meeting.
“It’s nice to meet you, Harry, Peter mentioned you the last time we spoke. You two know each other from sharing classes, right?” Bruce said, offering his hand for Harry to shake.
Harry shook the man’s hand, with his perfect polite smile on, and nodded slightly.
“It is nice to meet you too, sir. Yes, we do share classes.” Harry shook Uncle Bruce’s hand. “Peter told me that we would get along very well, apparently.”
Uncle Bruce smiled, and Peter could not help himself but nod enthusiastically.
“It’s because you both know a lot about biology and you’re both so smart.” Peter explained.
“Hey, I’m smart too, kid!” His father chimed in, making Peter’s mother laugh.
“Yes, we know, Tony, we know.” Uncle Bruce said, before raising his eyebrows while looking at Harry’s jumper. “Ah, I see they’ve kidnapped you already. Welcome to the club, but you’ll see, it’s not so bad. I should go put mine on then since everyone here is wearing theirs.”
Uncle Bruce was indeed looking a bit like the odd one out without his Christmas jumper, so it would make sense to go wear his, especially if Uncle Rhodey was supposed to come for dinner already wearing his. Peter’s mother approached them, putting a hand on Uncle Bruce’s shoulder, acting as if they had already greeted each other. Peter wondered when they had sneaked his uncle in. Was it when Peter had been sent to fetch the jumpers, or had that been only to let Uncle Bruce hide? Had he arrived when Peter was still in the workshop and had the “lunch is ready” text been his parents’ code phrase to let each other know Bruce had arrived? But then how did his mother know Peter would not be hanging out in the living room or kitchen when Uncle Bruce was set to arrive? She could not have predicted Harry crying and needed some space. Maybe she had planned an excuse to send him downstair, something about Eri for example? It was not really that hard to find a reason for Peter to go to his father’s workshop.
“You can do that, but be quick. We do need to eat lunch before it gets cold.” Peter’s mother said.
At least, the fact that lunch was ready was not a lie. Bruce went to change his jumper as Peter’s mother and Harry made their way to the dining room. Peter’s father, instead of following them, went to get the camera. Right, the picture, it was probably a fun one with Peter falling and all. Curious to see how bad it was, Peter joined his father.
“It got you right as you had started to fall.” His father commented, showing him the picture. “We’ll take a proper one when Rhodey is here.”
Peter cringed at the face he was making the picture, all wide-eyed and open-mouth. It might actually be in the top five of his worst pictures, which was saying something.
“You okay, kid?”
His father sounded so serious, it felt really weird. Peter nodded and looked up at him. He seemed worried, with his eyes scanning Peter’s face.
“Yeah, I just fell on my butt, it’s fine…” Peter replied, trying to not replay the memory in his head.
“I meant you jumping as if someone’s attacking you when it’s just Banner trying to surprise you… you never did that before.”
Peter suddenly felt uncomfortable as his father put down the camera and crossed his arms, still looking at him. He was not sure why he was feeling like that though. Was it because his father had somehow managed to notice one of the symptoms he had been trying so hard to hide from everyone but Gwen and his boxing teacher? Peter really did wish he could tell him all the crazy things that had happened so they could work together, but he knew he could not. If he did, his father would order him to stay out of it and let him deal with it instead. Peter did not want that, he did not want his father to clean up his messes, and he did not want to put somehow Gwen or Harry in danger by telling him.
“I don’t know, exams have been very stressful…” Petter shrugged.
Lies by omission had worked pretty well in the past on his father, Peter hoped that would still be the case.
“That bad?” He asked.
Peter shrugged again, focused on trying to give noncommittal answers to not outward lie to him.
“I’m sorry, kid. You know I’m proud of you no matter what, right?” He put a hand on Peter’s shoulder. “And that you can tell me anything?”
“I know, Dad.” Peter nodded.
His father patted him on the back of his shoulder.
“We’ll work on this, I don’t want… Ah, Banner, nearly kept us waiting!”
Uncle Bruce was coming down the stairs, wearing his Christmas jumper. Peter loved it when everybody was wearing theirs. It really made him feel part of the family and loved.
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything…” Bruce said, getting to the bottom of the stairs.
“It’s fine, Peps and Harry are probably waiting for us, and I don’t want her getting mad we took too long.” Peter’s father replied, gripping firmly Peter's shoulder and wrapping his free arm around Uncle Bruce’s shoulders. “Let’s go have lunch.”
Notes:
This chapter's title is making me picture Bruce getting to the Stark villa dressed as Santa Claus! (maybe I should have written that happening)
Also, I do have a list of all the chapters (written so far) with at what date they happened, so if you would like me to put at what date all the first semester chapters happened in an author note or if you would like me to start adding as a note to each chapter at what date they happen, let me know, I can definitely do that!
Chapter 24: Pepper Potts saves the day
Notes:
Hi,
I will not be posting chapter 25 next Sunday. Instead, I will post it in two weeks (on the 1st of September) and post a bonus next Sunday (you will be able to find it as “part 3” of the “Peter Stark’s Story” series). It is directly linked to this story, but it cannot really be posted as a chapter and you don’t have to read it to understand future chapters because as I said, it is really just a bonus.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Christmas came and went, and so did Uncle Bruce. They all had a nice time, with Harry and Uncle Bruce getting very well along, as Peter had expected. Uncle Rhodey had started to warm up to Harry as well, as it turned out they both liked some old movies that Peter had never heard about before. Peter had Uncle Bruce to thank for this, as his gift to Uncle Rhodey had been what he brought their shared interest up to light. Uncle Rhodey, of course, still seemed to mistrust Harry, but Peter was happy they were at least talking now. Harry had gotten a set of fancy kitchen equipment and some sort of subscription to high-quality ingredients from Peter’s parents, which had him gushing over for days, talking about all the nice meals he was going to make. They had also gotten him some books that were definitely the kind you would collect. Maybe Harry would put them on a shelve at his flat back at MIT, it would be nice to see some more of his personality around his flat. Peter had gotten some more things for his own collection of nerdy things, but most importantly some quality time with his Uncle Bruce. He had missed him so much that he had basically not left him alone for even a second during the few days he had been there. When he finally had to leave, Peter had felt himself transported back to when he was a kid and Uncle Bruce leaving would cause Peter to have tantrums. He had, of course, fought those feelings, not being a little kid anymore, and had then focused on spending some time with the rest of his family. He was really happy to get some nice bonding time with Uncle Rhodey as well. Indeed, the day Uncle Bruce left, Uncle Rhodey and he had played video games together, as they used to whenever Uncle Rhodey would have some free time and Peter was still living at home. This time, however, Harry had decided to also keep them company as he read a book not too far, watching them play from time to time. Uncle Rhodey was terrible at video games, but Peter would always go easy on him. He knew that his uncle would only play because it gave him a way to bond and spend time with his nephew. Thus, that evening, they took advantage of the fact that Uncle Rhodey did not have to work the next day and played late into the night, getting to bed after everyone, and only once Peter could not keep his eyes open long enough to play.
When Peter woke up the next day, everyone had already gotten ready and had started to do whatever they had planned to do that day. Peter ate alone in the kitchen, enjoying some leftover pancakes made by Harry. Being reheated did not stop those from being absolutely delicious. After eating a few of them, not wanting to get too full when lunch would be soon anyway, Peter cleaned up after himself and stayed a bit longer in the kitchen, watching some silly videos on his phone. He was not sure how long had passed when he got up and wandered to the living room, thinking about how he could spend whatever time he had left before lunch.
“Hi Honey, you’ve got great timing, I wanted to talk to you.”
His mother was sitting on the couch with her laptop near her on the coffee table. She was not officially working today, but she was probably still keeping an eye on work-related things. Peter was surprised to not see Harry with her. They had been spending a lot of time together as Peter had been spending a lot of time with Uncle Bruce. Now that he was thinking about it, Peter hoped that Harry did not think he had abandoned him or something. He should definitely spend more time with him, and Uncle Rhodey, now that Uncle Bruce was gone.
“Where’s Harry?” He asked, still a bit sleepy.
This made her smile, but Peter could not be bothered to wonder why.
“I think he is in his room. Come sit.” She said, tapping on the couch next to her.
Peter obeyed. Clearly, his mother wanted to talk to him about something, but he had no idea what. It could be something as casual as organising a movie night, which he would totally be down for as long as it was not one of Harry’s and Uncle Rhodey’s old movies, or something serious she was worried about. His mother closed her laptop and turned to Peter now sitting right next to her.
“You trust my opinion of people, right?”
That was a weird not-really-a-question-more-like-a-statement question. Yes, that was correct, of course, he did when she was much better than him at reading people, but why was she bringing it up? Was she going to tell him she did not like Harry? Peter suddenly felt wide awake. It could not be that, could it? They had spent so much time together over the past few days, they would have not done so if Peter's mother did not like him.
“I do…” Peter replied, trying to hide his worries.
His mother took his hands in hers, something she would only do when they were talking about something serious. Oh god, it was going to be bad.
“So please keep an open mind and listen to me, Honey.” Peter half-heartly nodded, just to get her to finally spill the beans. “You like Harry, don’t you?”
Peter blinked at her as his brain had stopped working. It was as if someone had just thrown a piece of chewing gum in the gears his brain was made of.
“What…?”
Finally processing the question fully, Peter realised that she had more probably than not meant ‘liked’ as one would like their friends. Of course, yes, Peter had been so silly to interpret this in another way. He really needed to stop assuming that everyone was trying to figure out everything that he was hiding, they otherwise might actually succeed.
“I mean, yes, he is my friend so of course I like him.” Peter awkwardly laughed.
His stomach felt strange and he wanted to go run and hide but he did not make the conversation weird. His mother was looking at him with her head slightly tilted to the side. That definitely did not help him to feel at ease.
“I meant romantically, Honey. Do you like him romantically?” She asked in a soft voice.
Peter backed away from her, removing his hands from her hold.
“No, I don’t, I…”
Did he not like Harry romantically? Had he not been desperate for his touch, to feel his hand in his hair and to be held by him again? Had he not tried to kiss him? Had Peter not loved seeing Harry wake up when they had shared a bed? Had his stomach not felt weird in the best way possible? Had he not kept his jumper and wore it to make himself feel better when everything was too much to bear? Had he not worked so hard on his gift, desperate for Harry to like it? Had seeing him love the gift so much and get so attached to it felt like the best thing in the world? Had Peter not been ready to punch Harry’s father to protect him, to defend him? Had it not felt just so right to see Harry wearing the Stark last name on his back? Had Peter not been desperate for him to get along with his family? Was all of this not what it meant to like someone romantically? Maybe Peter did like Harry romantically. Maybe that was the thing had tried so hard to not process ever since he had nearly kissed his friend, but there was a reason why he had pushed it down. It did not matter if Peter liked Harry romantically, it did not change anything, because…
“He doesn’t like me back.” Peter whispered so quietly he was not sure his mother had been able to hear him.
She slowly placed a hand on Peter’s right cheek. It was something she did not do that often since he had become older, but it still felt very nice.
“Why do you think that?” She asked.
Her voice was gentle, like her touch had been, but Peter could not bear looking at her. He felt too vulnerable, too embarrassed. He had never liked someone before, he had never talked about crushes and things of that nature to his mother. Did people talk to their mothers about those things? He did not know. What he did know was that his mother just wanted to help him and that he trusted her. That should be all that mattered, right?
“I…” Peter started but choked on his words.
This was so embarrassing.
“It’s okay, Honey, you can tell me.” His mother said, taking his hand again.
Peter let her take it and took a deep breath, trying to push the shame and awkwardness away.
“I tried to kiss him, but he… he pushed me away.” He explained, trying to hide his face in his free hand.
He felt his mother’s hand tense up, which made him his own to take a look at her face. She seemed either surprised or confused. Had she not expected him to try to kiss Harry or was she surprised that Harry had not let him?
“Did he say something when he pushed you away?” His mother asked, brushing his hand with her thumb.
Peter was not overjoyed at the idea of telling her what Harry had said. Would she be mad that he had drunk alcohol? Would she be disappointed? Could Peter really bear having two people he was close to being disappointed in him at the same time?
“I won’t judge, Honey, I just want to understand some things.”
Peter hesitated. His mother was great at making things better, so, maybe, she could help him repair his friendship with Harry?
“He said that I was drunk.” Peter mumbled as he looked away.
His mother stayed silent but was still brushing his hand. Peter really hoped this was not about to turn into a lecture about not drinking when underaged. He did not know if he could take that right now, he felt way too vulnerable. He really hated feeling like this. As she kept looking at Peter silently with a neutral expression, he figured that no, she was not going to be mad about him drinking, but also that she probably wanted to know more about what had happened.
“We were having dinner at his place.” Peter hesitated, wondering if he should mention why he was there and how it made everything worse, but he probably could not bear to do that. “And we drank wine. It was not to get drunk or anything, it just went well with the food, and I wanted to be a good guest, so I thought drinking a bit of wine would be okay.”
Admitting he got drunk on wine felt so embarrassing as if telling his mother that his best friend had rejected him had not been painful enough. Peter just wanted to hide and forget about this situation, not talk about it! There was nothing that could undo this, what was done was done, talking about it was useless.
“What happened after he stopped you from kissing him?” His mother asked in a neutral tone as if her son was not talking about the most embarrassing thing ever.
Peter could not help but think back to Harry’s horrified face, how much it had hurt to see him look at him like that. The shame and self-loathing for hurting his friend came back, nearly as strong as it had been that night.
“Does it matter?!” Peter snapped as he backed away. “He did not want me to kiss him, that’s it!”
“Peter…” His mother said in a stern voice, the one she would use to scold him.
Right, it was useless and did not make sense to get mad at his mother because of something he had done. Peter took a few deep breaths, trying to calm down.
“I apologised, and I tried to leave but he did not let me.” Peter explained, trying hard to push his emotions down so he would not get angry again. “So I slept in his bed while he slept on his couch.”
“And then the next morning?” His mother asked, still in a neutral tone.
“He made pancakes and said we didn’t have to talk about it if I didn’t want to.”
“Oh, Honey…”
Her tone had changed. It was not neutral anymore, but Peter had trouble figuring out what it meant exactly. It was a bit like when he would do something that his mother found cute, but what had happened was not cute, quite the opposite. Thus, Peter was looking at his mother, completely confused by this sudden change of tone.
“Did you consider that, maybe, he did want to kiss you, but he did not want to kiss you while you were drunk?”
This made Peter frown. What was she saying? Harry had not wanted to kiss him, he had looked so horrified.
“What? No…”
“I’ve seen how you two look at each other, and how you act. I cannot, of course, say for sure, but if I was you, I’d…”
Peter stood up, interrupting his mother. Had Harry actually wanted Peter to kiss him? Had he been trying to apologise to Peter for pushing him away by making pancakes? Was that why he had been acting so weird? He had to ask Harry. He had to know if his mother was right or not. She had nearly always been nearly right, so he had to know if that was the case here. Peter needed to know if he had indeed completely misread the situation but in the opposite way he had thought he had. Only one person could answer that: Harry. Without explaining to his mother what was going through his mind, Peter ran upstairs to his friend’s room, climbing the stairs at an impressive speed. He went straight for Harry’s room. He had to know now if he liked him or not, no time for figuring out the right words or the right way to go about this. Peter nearly crashed into Harry’s bedroom door, stumbling on it as he pushed it right open.
“Why didn’t you let me kiss you?!” Peter blurted out before even seeing his friend.
“Excuse me?!”
Harry was sitting on a chair near his bed as he was holding a book in his hands and looking completely confused. Right, yes, context. Peter needed to give context so his friend could understand his question.
“That night, when we had dinner at your place, when I tried to kiss you… Why did you not let me?” Peter asked, trying to stop his voice from shaking.
It seemed to take Harry a few seconds to process what Peter had said, as he was just staring at him for a bit before putting his book down on the desk.
“You were drunk, Peter…” He said, passing a hand through his hair and looking away.
“So?”
“So?!” Harry said louder than he had ever spoken before. “I was not going to kiss you while you were drunk!”
Was Peter’s mother right, then? Had Harry indeed wanted to kiss him? Peter needed him to say it clearly, he could not misunderstand something again.
“Why? I wanted to kiss you, so why…”
“Because you couldn’t consent properly and I did not want our first kiss to happen like that, for christ’s sake!” Harry yelled while standing up.
Instinctively, Peter took a step back, before realising what his friend had said. He had wanted Peter to kiss him. Harry seemed to be as shocked as Peter was by what he had said.
“I… I wanted us to have a proper first kiss, not one you might regret later on! I’ve been trying so hard, Peter. I’ve let you take your time, I’ve let you be embarrassed about getting closer to me… I was okay with you needing time to process your possible feelings, I was even okay with our relationship to be a fucking secret from everyone including your family if that was what you wanted!”
Harry seemed really angry, as he had indeed been holding this in forever.
“But then I’m not allowed to want us to have a good first kiss? That because you needed to be drunk to finally kiss me, I cannot have the one thing I require?” Harry asked, his voice not sounding angry anymore, but sad instead.
Peter had hurt him. He had done so multiple times without even realising it.
“I’m sorry, I did not realise, I…”
“I know, Pete, I know.” Harry cut him off, sighing.
They both stayed silent for a little bit. Peter was still processing not only his own feelings now but also Harry’s.
“Peter…” Harry said in a low voice which still made Peter feel a wave of anxiety. “Please hug me.”
Peter could absolutely do that. He walked towards Harry slowly, before pulling him against him and wrapping his arms around his body. Once again, Harry simply melted against Peter, making his stomach feel funny. Harry did really like those hugs, Peter would have to hug him more often, now that he knew it was okay. As he held Harry in his arms, Peter thought back to what Harry had just said to him. Peter had clearly hurt Harry, but he could make it up to him. Now that he knew what exactly had gone wrong, he could correct it, he just had to be brave enough.
“May I kiss you?” He asked, looking up at Harry as he felt his heart beating in his throat.
The few seconds during which Harry just looked at him felt like an eternity, one during which Peter could not breathe, but Harry finally nodded.
“I beg you to.” He whispered.
Not knowing how else to go about it, Peter slowly put his hands on Harry’s waist. He found himself gripping Harry’s shirt, needing to hold on to something to stop his hands from shaking. Harry did not seem to mind as he placed both of his hands on Peter’s shoulders. He looked so pretty, so perfect, with his hair a bit messy from running his hand through it and with those eyes wide open. Peter’s eyes fell on Harry’s lips which were slightly apart from each other, as if they were waiting for Peter’s. They actually were, he realised, creating a knot out of his stomach. Scared he might fall backwards otherwise, Peter gripped Harry tighter before closing his eyes and leaning in. He nearly jumped when he felt something against his lips. It was so soft. It moved against his lips, and he tried to follow it, scared it might disappear otherwise. It tasted like heaven, that was the only way Peter was able to describe it as no other word seemed to come close enough to it. He spent some time just enjoying the taste and how it felt against his lips, but as he did so he started to feel more and more warm, as if someone was increasing the heating. Peter did not feel like gripping Harry’s waist to support himself was enough anymore, wrapping his arms around it instead and pulling it tightly against him. He also started to feel hungry for Harry’s lips, wanting to taste them better and trying to do so. Peter felt one of the hands that had been on his shoulders slide up the back of his neck, giving him shivers, before lodging itself into his hair. At the same time, something wetter than the rest came against his lips as if it was asking for permission to enter his mouth. He let it, and soon enough it started caressing his tongue. Peter squeezed Harry’s sides with his hands and tried to follow what must have been Harry’s tongue with his own, making the hand in his hair grip it. Peter thought he was about to explode, feeling way too hot for it to be normal, when…
“Peter!”
The voice had been loud and scary enough for Peter to jump back, letting go of Harry. It had sounded like when his father had caught him at that convention Peter had snuck out to, but it was not his father’s voice. No, it was way worse… It was Rhodey’s, and he looked pissed. Peter should have really closed that goddamn door.
“Uncle Rhodey!” Peter blurted out, panicking.
“What on earth were you doing?!” Uncle Rhodey asked, crossing his arms.
That was a weird question to ask, had it not been clear? Was it a chance to deny what had happened? Peter would have shot Harry a look to try to get his help on what to reply, but he had the feeling he probably did not want to take his eyes off his uncle.
“Well, I was…”
“That was rhetorical, Peter!” Uncle Rhodey snapped.
Right, that made more sense, but Peter still had no idea how to handle the situation. Too many things had happened way too fast for him to think about them properly right now. Uncle Rhodey was now glaring at Harry as if he was about to put on his Iron Patriot suit and kick his butt. Peter definitely did not want that to happen. It would probably be smart to divert his uncle’s attention back to him before he would decide to actually go get his suit.
“Did you… want something?” Peter asked, trying to sound normal but probably failing at that.
That got Uncle Rhodey’s attention alright, but Peter nearly jumped at his death stare. Yikes.
“Lunch’s ready.” He replied coldly.
Great, that was an excuse to get the hell out of there, exactly what they had needed. Peter grabbed Harry’s arm and pulled him behind him as he powerwalked to the door.
“Let’s go to lunch, then!” Peter said with an awkward laugh.
He managed to walk past his uncle, but as soon as he did, he felt some resistance from Harry’s arm. When Peter looked back, he saw that Uncle Rhodey had stopped Harry from leaving the room by putting his arm in the way.
“I want to have a conversation with your boyfriend first.” Rhodey said in a stern voice.
Peter blushed at that.
“He’s not my…”
Well, was he not his boyfriend? They had just kissed, it had been quite an intense kiss even, and Harry had wanted their first kiss to be a proper one. That most likely meant he did like Peter romantically, and it was not just some weird… fling? Or whatever it would have been called. Peter sure did like him romantically, so that meant they were probably boyfriends. Peter stepped closer to his uncle so he could try to talk to him without Harry hearing them.
“You said you would not threaten him!” Peter whispered.
“That was before I knew he was not your friend but your boyfriend!” Uncle Rhodey whispered back.
Peter hated to admit it, but Uncle Rhodey did have a point.
“Please don’t be too mean, I’m the one who kissed him.” Peter said, trying not to blush again.
He had not planned on giving that piece of information to Uncle Rhodey of all people.
“I’ll do what I need to do, Peter.”
There was not a lot Peter could do that would not make the situation worse. He looked back to Harry who had a very weird smile, but slowly nodded.
“I’ll be okay.” Harry said, but he did not look very convinced of that himself.
“Okay…” Peter sighed.
Peter let go of Harry and headed downstairs, hoping that Uncle Rhodey would not try to scare Harry too much. As he got downstairs and into the dining room, he saw that the table was indeed set with his parents already sitting at their usual seats. Still feeling the embarrassment from having his uncle walking on him kissing Harry and from the conversation with his mother, Peter kept his head down as he sat down.
“You okay, kid?” Peter’s father asked.
Trying to hide his embarrassment, Peter did not look up and simply nodded. Why was he feeling like a little kid who had been caught doing something naughty when he had done nothing wrong by kissing Harry? If only Uncle Rhodey could chill for a second and realise that, Peter would be very grateful.
“Where are Rhodey and… Ah! Here you guys are, took you long enough. It’s not as we were waiting for you.” His father said, making him look up.
Harry and Uncle Rhodey were indeed walking into the dining room. Peter’s eyes went straight to Harry’s face, trying to see if he was okay or if his uncle had been a dick. As if he was reading Peter’s mind, Harry smiled at him before sitting down next to him and whispering in his ear:
“I’m okay. Your uncle just wanted to let me know how much he cares for you.”
That probably meant he did threaten Harry with multiple things, but that Harry had understood where he was coming from and had not made things worse. Peter could not help but let out a sigh of relief. Uncle Rhodey had not made his first-ever boyfriend run away right after their first kiss. However, some of Peter’s relief disappeared when he noticed both his mother and uncle watching him intently. Lovely.
“Okay, I’m going to dig in because I’m starving. You guys can join me when you’re done staring at each other.” His father said before reaching for the food to put on his plate.
Peter felt oh so grateful for his father and got some food as well, figuring out the quicker the lunch was over, the sooner he would be able to run away from his family’s stares.
“I’m hungry too!” He said, getting some food on his plate as well.
They then started to eat, but Peter could still feel people staring at him, which was starting to kill his appetite. It seemed to be the case for Harry as well, he had barely touched his food and he was clearly trying to avoid looking at Uncle Rhodey who was seated right across from him and still giving him some bad looks. What a lovely lunch this was.
“Can someone please, for the love of god, tell me what’s going on?” Peter’s father loudly asked, making a show of putting down his cutlery and looking around.
Peter immediately shot up a look at his uncle. His mother had probably figured out more or less what had happened, but Peter knew she would not talk. His uncle on the other hand might. Uncle Rhodey raised an eyebrow as Peter tried to plead for him to not say anything with his eyes.
“I can see all of you acting strange.” His father added, still looking around. He then stopped his gaze on Peter. “So spit it out now.”
Of course he was targeting Peter who would usually be the weakest link in those types of scenarios. He tried not to feel offended, knowing his father was right, and instead focused on looking normal.
“I don’t know, Dad, I..”
“I caught Peter and Harry kissing.” Rhodey interrupted.
Oh wow, getting betrayed by your own uncle who you had in the past trusted to keep your secrets, how fucking great. Peter looked at him, this time definitely feeling offended and showing it.
“Seriously?!” Peter said, probably louder than he had intended to.
“Oh.”
Peter looked at his father who seemed to be processing the information. His mother, however, did not seem surprised at all, which he had expected, but had her hand on Peter’s father. Peter wondered why. After a few seconds, his father finally spoke again:
“Congratulations, you’re getting the talk.”
“WHAT?!” Peter said, even louder and dropping his cutlery on the table. “You said I didn’t have to!”
He had worked so hard (and had been so utterly stubborn) to not have to listen to one of his family members trying to teach him about safe sex and that other kinds of lovely things. Now his father was going back on that?!
“That, young man, was before you were caught making out with your…” He looked at Harry and then back to Peter. “What are you guys? Boyfriends?”
Peter felt himself burning up from embarrassment, again. He had not gotten the time to process he just had his first kiss that now everyone was talking about how he had a boyfriend. Peter wanted to keep acting like a kid, denying and hiding, but he remembered what Harry had just told him. He had said he would have been okay with the two of us liking each other being a secret to Peter’s family, but he had clearly not wanted that. He had also wanted them to have a proper kiss, which indicated he was serious about their relationship. With all of that, Peter had not really any choice but to recognise that yes, they were boyfriends.
“Yes, boyfriends.” He said, fighting the urge to hide his face and not even thinking about looking at Harry or Rhodey. “But it’s not fair, you didn’t say anything about changing your mind if I ever got a boyfriend!”
Trying to gain support, Peter looked at his mother. Surely, she would be on his side and not let him die from embarrassment.
“I’m sorry, Honey, but I agree with your father.” She said with a small smile.
Et tu, Brute? They were really turning on him.
“Look kid, we’re just trying to do what’s best for you.” His father sighed. “You can pick who’s going to give you the talk, okay?”
It seemed like Peter was not going to get out of it and all of his previous efforts had been pointless. At least, he could try to figure out how to make things less painful and awkward for him by picking the right person. There was one painfully obvious choice. It was still going to be quite embarrassing, but less than with any of his other options. Uncle Rhodey was going to be pissed about it. Good. Peter tried to hide a smirk thinking about it, already picturing the face he was going to make.
“I…”
“No, it cannot be your boyfriend.” His father cut him off.
Well, that was complete bullshit. First, his parents had gone back on their agreement that Peter did not have to suffer through the talk, now his father was also going back on what he had just said literally less than a minute ago.
“What conditions must the person I pick fulfil, then?” Peter asked.
He was not going to name people for his father to shut down. No, he was going to get all the criteria first so then he could choose someone his parents would not veto for no good reason.
“They must be an adult, I must know them, and I must trust them.” His father said.
Peter guessed that the last condition was what his father would use to justify vetoing Harry. It was quite a vague criterion, as Peter could not prove that his father trusted certain people, so he could just use it to veto people he did not approve of, even if he might somewhat trust them. Smart, annoyingly smart. However, Peter could be annoyingly smart too, he was a Stark after all, was he not? He could pick Steve Rogers, for example. He was an adult, his father knew him, and he trusted him enough to have his back during missions, so could he really argue he did not actually trust him? It would annoy him for sure, as Steve would definitely then try to talk to Tony about the talk he had given to Peter, and Peter could use that to get him to talk about all the moral values that made his father groan. Pretty effective and just revenge: Peter got the talk, and then so did his father. However, there was one big obvious flaw in that plan: Steve Rogers would give him the talk. No, thank you. It was not that Peter did not like Steve, it was more that he was scared to imagine what kind of talk he would give him when he had grown up in the old times. There was one other petty option that Peter could use to get revenge: Uncle Rhodey. That would definitely make him regret snitching on Peter, but once again there was the flaw that it would mean that Uncle Rhodey would give him the talk and, once again, no thank you. Peter could ask Bruce to do it over a video call, but that still felt too awkward. He did not want to have it with his mother, she already knew too much, and he would literally pick anyone before he even thought about picking his father to do it. Peter would definitely not survive having his father would give him the talk. This left only one option, the perfect option, the one option that would not make this too awkward for Peter to handle.
“Okay, I pick Jarvis then.” Peter said confidently.
Upon seeing the puzzled looks on his parents’ faces, Peter decided to elaborate.
“He’s an adult, no matter if you consider the number of years he has been existing for or his maturity level. You obviously know him and trust him, since you know, he’s literally helping Mom to run Stark Industries.”
For the few seconds during which nobody spoke, Peter held his breath. He really hoped his parents would not find some dumb loophole, as Jarvis would be the perfect choice.
“The kid’s right.” His father shrugged.
Peter breathed again, feeling his body relaxing.
“Are you sure Jarvis is capable of doing this, Tony?” Peter’s mother asked with her hand still on his father’s.
“Let’s ask him, shall we? Jarvis, you think you can handle giving the talk to the kid?”
“I would like to consult you beforehand to verify what subjects need to be discussed and how, but I otherwise feel confident about being able to give young mister Stark the talk, Sir.”
As he did every time Jarvis spoke, Harry tensed up for a few instants, before relaxing again. He was not really the type to jump at random noises or to get surprised easily, so Peter wondered why Jarvis had this effect on him. Harry did not seem to dislike him though as he had always been quite polite and friendly the few times they had interacted. It was probably just that Harry was not used to having an AI around. It would make sense for him to need some time to get used to Jarvis.
“That’s settled then, Jarvis will give you the talk.” Peter’s father said before looking at Harry. “You already got the talk, right? Or is Jarvis getting a two-for-one deal?”
Harry tensed up a bit at that question, but Peter could not blame him. What could be more awkward than having your brand new boyfriend’s father ask you if you had the talk?
“Yes, I already have gotten the talk, Tony.” Harry politely replied.
Apart from him initially tensing up, he looked so comfortable. Peter wondered how he was able to do that, especially when Peter had doubts that anyone had actually given him the talk. Well, maybe one of his tutors or one of the people in charge of looking after him did. Whatever the case was, Peter was pretty sure he did not need it now, so he was not going to snitch on him… unlike how Uncle Rhodey had snitched on Peter.
“Good, so now you guys can stop acting weird and let me enjoy the food.”
Most of the tension and awkwardness were still there, but now Peter’s father was happily eating his food and Peter was too busy being mad at Uncle Rhodey to feel awkward. This made going through the meal much more bearable despite the dreadful talk that Peter was going to have afterwards.
Notes:
This chapter is quite special to me for a few reasons. Firstly, I have now been posting chapters for this fic for exactly six months! I’ve been writing this story for much longer than that, but it is crazy to see how in only six months the story has more than doubled in length. Thank you so much for all the kudos, bookmarks, subs and comments. They, especially comments (thank you SO MUCH Bobross, Drei and aVeryGreenApple), have really helped me get motivated to keep writing it outside of stressful periods of time (as I would only write when stressed out as a way to cope) hence why it got so long much more quickly. Secondly and thirdly, Peter and Harry finally got together/kissed! Yay! That took long enough, just under 100k words, but this chapter did make us hit 100k words, which is crazy to me! The funny thing is, when I started writing for this story more frequently, I decided to reread all of my chapters to really get my head back into it and I kind of panicked thinking “Oh no, they are getting too close too fast!”. I guess I was wrong about that one, lol (thank you to Yen, my friend and beta reader, for reassuring me that no, I did not completely mess up their relationship, for listening to so many rants and answering so many questions). Anyway, thank you so much for following my silly (not so little) story and hopefully, you will like the rest of it!
Chapter 25: Taking steps towards and away from each other
Notes:
Hi guys, here is chapter 25! In case you missed it, last week I posted Harry's POV of chapters 18 and 19. If you're interested, you can find it as part 3 of this series or here.
Content Warnings
Mentions of homophobia / forced coming out
From "Peter looked at his uncle" to the end of the chapter.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Peter had always been grateful for Jarvis and considered him part of his family. Indeed, Jarvis had always been there when Peter had needed him, at least when he was living at his parents’. However, Peter was now even more grateful for him. Jarvis had made “The Talk” far less horrible than Peter had feared it to be by simply talking about everything in a clinical manner as if he was merely teaching Peter about some scientific topic and not something so intimate and embarrassing. It still had been an unpleasant talk that Peter could not wait to run away from, but he was very well aware it could have been much worse. Peter had made the right decision by picking Jarvis to give him the talk. The only time Peter had still nearly lost it during their conversation was when Jarvis had tried to offer him a box of condoms. The implications of his parents telling Jarvis to offer it to him and them managing to get their hands on one so quickly had been too much for Peter’s brain process. So, of course, Peter’s response to that had been to yell that he did not want it and then run away. He was, after all, known to be very mature when it came to anything related to this subject. Peter had run all the way from his father’s workshop to his room, had flung his door open, and got greeted with a:
“So, how was the talk?”
Harry was sitting at Peter’s desk, holding the same book he had been reading the last time Peter had barged into a room. After the lovely conversation Pete had just had with Jarvis, and everything that had happened before that, it took a few moments for his brain to register that Harry was indeed in his room and had asked him a question.
“It could have been worse, I guess.” Peter finally replied, awkwardly stepping into his bedroom.
As he watched Harry put down his book, Peter realised they had not been alone since their kiss earlier that day and he had no idea how to act now. They had had quite the intense making out session just this morning, but now, simply being in the same room as Harry felt so intimidating to Peter.
“Congratulations on surviving it.” Harry said with a small smile.
“Thanks.” Peter let himself fall onto his bed with a sigh. “I’m glad it’s over.”
He felt exhausted. Too many things had happened in just one day and none of it felt real. To be clear, kissing Harry had very much felt real in the moment, but now Peter had trouble believing it had actually happened. He rationally knew it did and all the new sensations and things he had felt were now carved into his brain. The most mortifying lunch and talk of his life had just suffered through because Uncle Rhodey had snitched on him also proved he had not dreamt the entire thing. However, his brain still could not process it properly.
“I was hoping we could have a talk of our own.”
Upon hearing that, Peter’s body shot up to sit down straight. Conflicting thoughts were fighting in his head. On one hand, Peter wanted to groan and ask if they really had to have a talk as well. Peter just wanted to have some time to breathe and get over everything that had happened that day. On the other, talking about what their relationship was now could actually help. Peter had no idea how to be someone’s boyfriend, what that entailed and whatnot, so Harry giving him some guidance on that would be very much appreciated. It would definitely help him to not mess up their relationship on accident and also organise his thoughts.
“About what?” Peter asked.
“Just about…”
Harry paused and ran a hand through his hair. Peter had seen him do this multiple times, but it was still not something Harry would do often. Peter wondered if this was some sort of telltale sign that Harry was feeling nervous or if Peter was again overanalysing his friend, or rather now boyfriend. His boyfriend, Peter really needed to get used to calling Harry that.
“I just want to make sure you know that …” Harry paused again but for a shorter time. “you’re not expected to do anything you’re not comfortable with, Pete. Just because your parents made you have the talk after learning that you had a boyfriend, and just because we had a…” Harry seemed to look for a word. “…quite passionate kiss, doesn't mean you’re expected to go off and have sex now.”
Oh god, even though he just had a talk about how to have safe sex, Peter’s brain had not come close to linking the facts that people in relationships tended to have sex and that he was in one with Harry. It should have been an obvious connection, as why else would his parents change their minds about him having to sit through the talk, but for some reason, it had not been for Peter. He had not had the time to process he just had his first kiss, much less think about whether or not he would want to have sex with Harry. Did he want to have sex with Harry? It felt way too soon to think about that, it was like thinking of a colour palette to paint a robot with when you had not even figured out how you were going to build it yet. Was he completely opposed to the idea of having sex with Harry at some point? Well, Harry was very handsome and his boyfriend. Peter also seemed to quite appreciate physical contact with him, so, maybe he was not?
“I know, I…”
Peter’s face felt way too hot, making it hard to figure out what to say. Was he supposed to just reassure Harry he was not feeling pressured to do anything? Or was he supposed to tell him how he felt about possibly having intercourse with him as well? That second thing would be so awkward to say, but Peter had seen what would happen when they did not communicate properly. He did not want them to misunderstand each other and needlessly fight again.
“I think I might want to at some point, just not now. It feels too soon.”
It had been a struggle to get the words out, but Peter had done it. He even managed to say it without hiding his face in his hands. However, he could not dare to look at Harry.
“That’s okay, but know you can always change your mind about that.” Harry said.
His voice sounded so soothing that Peter could not help but look at him again. He had a small smile that looked great on him.
“It’s okay if you end up never wanting to, we do not ever have to do anything you’re not comfortable with. I’m okay with us never having sex, I just want us to have a good relationship.” He then added.
The mixture of how comforting Harry had sounded and how he was now caressing the back of Peter’s hand with his thumb made Peter’s entire body finally relax. He could finally breathe again, finally freed from fight-or-flight mode.
“Do you want me to massage your head?” Harry suddenly asked.
This surprised Peter as he had not expected such an offer, even with them now being boyfriends. However, it sounded really nice and exactly what he needed right now if the previous two times Harry had played with his hair were anything to go by.
“Sure. Thanks.” Peter replied, trying to show he was grateful by smiling.
Harry took off his slippers and sat on the bed, moving the pillows so he could rest his back against the wall and extend his legs. He then lightly tapped both of his thighs.
“You can lay your head here if you’re okay with that.”
Peter had never laid his head on someone’s thighs before but figured it was probably a nice thing boyfriends would do. Harry started to massage his head and Peter could not resist closing his eyes. It just felt so good that Peter might fall asleep.
“Pete?"
“Mmh?”
Fighting the grogginess that was taking over him, Peter opened an eye to look at Harry. The angle was a bit awkward, but he, of course, still looked great.
“What would be your ideal first date?” Harry asked, now more playing with his hair than massaging his head.
“Uh…” Peter tried to think about it, opening his other eye as well, but his mind was blank. He really had not expected that question. “I don’t know.”
Harry looked at him surprised. Was Peter supposed to feel embarrassed he did not know what his ideal first date would be?
“Really? You’ve never thought about it?” Harry asked.
“No, not really.” Peter shrugged.
He had been way too busy trying to make friends while at school to imagine what kind of first date he might want to go on one day. Then, after the whole “friend fiasco”, it would have been a complete waste of time when he had given up even being friends with someone. However, Harry seemed somewhat disappointed, and Peter did have a boyfriend now, so it was not a waste of time anymore. Indeed, maybe Harry was asking him that because he wanted to take Peter on a date? Peter blushed at that idea. Going on a date with Harry, Peter would really like that. Thus, Peter tried to think of a good answer to Harry’s question, listing things he had enjoyed doing with his family, removing the cringey or probably not date-appropriate options.
“I did have an amazing time going to Disneyland with my family.” Peter thought out loud. “Maybe it could be a fun date as well? If that’s dumb, then…”
“It’s a great idea, Pete.” Harry cut him off.
Peter looked at him, surprised. Harry was smiling like a little kid, clearly excited. It seemed like he liked Peter’s answer. Wait, were they actually going to go on a date together at Disneyland? Peter’s face burnt again and he started feeling a mixture of excitement and fear. Going on dates was a normal thing for boyfriends to do, but Peter had never been asked on a date before, much less been on one.
“Are we actually going to…?”
Harry nodded enthusiastically.
“It’s probably too late to be able to go tomorrow, but I’m sure we can arrange something for in a few days. I’ll call to set up everything. They probably have…”
He kept going but Peter could not listen to anything he was saying anymore as he was too busy to soak in how much Harry seemed excited about this. Harry was going to take him on a date, and Harry was so excited about it, even if Peter’s idea was so silly and probably cringe. Still, he was already planning everything.
“Can I kiss you?” Peter blurted out before realising what he was asking.
For what was probably just a few seconds, but felt like forever as Peter was simply soaking in a deep state of embarrassment, Harry just looked at him before flashing his signature smile, which just made Peter want to kiss him even more.
“Oh Pete, after that first kiss, you can kiss me whenever you want!”
Harry stopped stroking Peter’s hair, but he was now too busy hiding his face and feeling embarrassed to complain.
“Shut up.” He mumbled.
How was Harry still able to make him feel like his face was going to explode with only a remark? It really was not fair. Peter did not dare remove a hand from over his eyes, knowing that Harry was probably smiling like an idiot.
“Make me.” Harry said in his teasing tone.
This made Peter feel weird. In what way exactly and why? Peter had no idea but he knew too many things had happened today for him to try to understand it. He took a deep breath, trying to pull himself back together from whatever Harry had done to him, and removed his hands from his face.
“Harry…” He said as he sat back down, making sure to not hit Harry’s head while doing so.
“Sorry, too much?” Harry asked with a small smile.
Peter simply nodded, still embarrassed. He did not want to make Harry feel bad though, he had not done anything wrong, Peter just had a long day.
“It’s fine.”
He gave Harry his best smile, but he knew it was probably not a great one.
“Still want to kiss me, though?”
There was probably nothing in the world right now that would make Peter not want to kiss Harry. Well, nothing in the world but Uncle Rhodey, Peter did definitely not want to kiss Harry in front of him, again. Luckily, Uncle Rhodey was not there and this time, the bedroom door was closed.
“I do.”
Harry’s face lighted up and Peter knew that if he did not kiss Harry right this instant, Peter would explode. The question now was how to do that. He could not really grab Harry’s waist without looking awkward as they were both sitting on his bed. So where should he put his hands? People in the movies would sometimes put them on the other person’s cheek, but that did not feel like the right move to Peter. Did he actually have to put his hands somewhere? Maybe he could just lean in and kiss Harry? It was not going to be a long kiss anyway, not like the one had earlier. Or was it going to be a long one? How did one know how long to kiss someone for? Their first kiss had stopped because someone had walked in on them, but Peter was pretty sure that was not what would normally dictate when to stop kissing. Then what did? Was he supposed to…
“Here.”
A hand slid on the back of Peter’s neck, pulling him away from his thoughts and towards Harry instead. He let himself get pulled in and closed his eyes. He could not help but feel grateful for Harry giving him a hand with figuring out how to kiss someone. Their lips touched and, once again, Peter tried to follow Harry’s lead. They tasted as good as they had tasted the first time they had kissed, if not better. With things being a bit calmer now, Peter could really focus on how they felt against his. They were surprisingly soft. Harry probably used a lips balm or something, he did seem to take great care of himself. Should Peter start to take better care of his lips and himself in general? Maybe he could learn from Harry, Harry would probably like that. Peter did not have the time to really ponder that thought, as Harry broke the kiss, leaning back. Their second kiss had not lasted nearly as long as their first one, and no tongues this time, but it was okay, they would have more opportunities to kiss. Peter might be unsure about whether or not he wanted to have sex with Harry, but he knew he definitely wanted to keep kissing him. Peter cleared his throat, gathering the courage to tell Harry this.
“I am definitely okay with kissing. Us kissing, I mean, not that I’m okay at kissing.”
Why could Peter not talk properly? He was simply communicating that he was comfortable doing what they had literally just done, no need for him to become as red as a lobster.
“Since you know, I said I was not yet comfortable for the rest…” Peter added, trying to explain himself.
Yes, bringing that up was definitely not going to make Peter feel even more embarrassed and thus worsen his already lacking communication skills. Harry smiled and moved his hand up so it was more towards the bottom of Peter’s head than on its neck.
“Noted.”
Harry kissed him again, but this time it was much quicker, Peter had barely time to feel Harry’s lips against his before they were gone. Harry then removed his hand and let himself fall back on the bed. Peter should probably lie down next to him, right? He did and then stayed silent for a bit. Peter was trying to process what had happened and soaking a bit in the moment. They had kissed, again. They had kissed three times, and the last time had been fully initiated by Harry even if it had been a very brief kiss. This fact seemed awesome, for some reason. What was even more awesome than Harry kissing him was that Harry was going to plan their first date. How crazy was that?! Harry wanted to go on a date with Peter enough to go along with his silly idea of a date and plan it. This made Peter so very happy.
“Thanks for planning our date.”
Calling it a date out loud felt weird, but it was the right word for it, and he wanted to show Harry how grateful he was.
“I figured it was only fair, it’s my turn to take a step forward.” Harry replied sounding so casual, as it had been the most logical thing in the world.
Maybe that was what being in a relationship was about: taking steps towards each other. Peter could deal with that, that made sense. He would just need to figure out what those steps were supposed to be.
“Pete?”
Peter looked at Harry who was staring at the ceiling even though the star projector was not on.
“Yes?”
“Can we share a bed tonight? I tend to sleep better when we do.”
Harry stopped looking up, his eyes focusing on Peter instead. Something in them made Peter want to make sure they would spend each and every night together. It was not as if he was planning on declining anyway, as he too would sleep better when he had Harry at his side. Knowing Harry was safe next to him would wonders when it came to the quality of his sleep.
“Of course.” Peter replied and gave Harry his best comforting smile.
It seemed to work, as Harry smiled back.
“Thanks.”
Harry then took a deep breath and sat back on the bed.
“I will now need to do the unthinkable and go back to my room, as I have a date to plan, mister.” He said with his sassy voice and smile.
Mister? That was a weird nickname, Peter liked Pete better but was not going to say anything, especially when Harry was going to plan their date.
“I have phone calls to make, and I do not want you to hear any of them.” Harry added.
“Can I do something to help plan it?” Peter asked, also sitting down.
Harry’s smile grew and Peter knew he should brace himself for whatever was coming out of his boyfriend’s mouth.
“I would not mind you looking cute and kissing me.”
Despite the advanced warning, Peter still felt himself blush and completely lost his ability to form a coherent sentence. Harry now being his boyfriend did not make it easier to deal with that kind of remarks, quite the opposite actually. Peter simply nodded and added “how to look cute” to his list of things to figure out.
“I’ll see you at dinner, Pete.” Harry said, giving Peter one last smile before making his way out of the room.
As soon as Harry had left the room, Peter let himself fall backwards on the bed, lying down again and smiling like an idiot. He had finally started to process everything that had happened that day, but one thing stayed at the forefront of his mind: he was going to go on a date. Oh god, he was going on a date. He had absolutely no idea how to prepare for one! Should he ask his mother how to prepare? Or his father? Maybe both, as they would definitely have very different answers, and he could try to sort through them. It would be embarrassing to ask them, but Peter did not have much to lose as they already knew about him and Harry and going on a date was the logical progression. Peter was about to run to whichever of his parents he would bump into first when someone knocked at his bedroom door. Peter straightened back up, wondering who it could be. Was it Harry who already had a question about their date? Peter would not mind answering all and any questions he might have, even if he had thousands of them. With his heart full of hope, Peter went to open his door, only to be greeted with disappointment. Uncle Rhodey.
“Can we talk, Peter?”
Peter felt the sting of his uncle’s betrayal again, overshadowing the joy Harry had brought him.
“Why?” He asked in a harsh tone.
Was Rhodey here to try to get some more information to betray him with? Should Peter tell him something fake so he would look like a fool to Peter’s parents? It was a tempting way to try to get some payback, but Peter knew it was a bad idea. He did not want more drama, he just wanted to be happy about the fact he was going to go on his first date ever with Harry.
“Listen, Peter, I know you’re angry with me…”
“You think?” Peter raised an eyebrow.
Rhodey looked at him for a few seconds, which was annoying. Peter had the right to be angry at his uncle, it was not that crazy thing that should make people stare at him.
“And I understand why.” Rhodey added. “But I assure you, I did not tell them about your boyfriend to be a dick, I was…”
“It did seem to me like you were trying to a dick because I got a boyfriend you don’t approve of, but okay.” Peter cut him off again, getting annoyed that his uncle was trying to act as if he was the reasonable one who was in the right.
“I’m just trying to look out for you, Peter.” Rhodey snapped before taking a deep breath. “Sorry. I know what I did wasn’t cool, but your parents needed to know about you having a boyfriend, so they could parent accordingly.”
Rhodey might have a point, but Peter still felt betrayed.
“You could have given me a chance to tell them, instead of just snitching right after our first kiss.” Peter crossed his arms.
This seemed to have caught Rhodey off guard, as he was just staring at Peter now, mouth slightly opened. That, too, was annoying.
“It was you guys’ first kiss?” He asked.
His tone sounded much softer, something that was rare for him. It made Peter uncomfortable for some unknown reason. Why did it matter it was their first kiss? Rhodey had still betrayed him.
“Obviously.” Peter replied, doing his best to sound mean, even rolling his eyes.
“Peter, I…” Rhodey took a deep breath, looked away and then back to Peter. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realise it was your first kiss, that’s why I told your parents. I thought you guys had been sneaking around and you had lied to me about him being your friend.”
“Oh.”
Peter looked at his uncle. Would he too be mad if someone had lied to him about that kind of thing? Maybe yes, or, maybe, he would give them grace as they might not be ready to tell people about their relationship.
“It’d still be a dick move. Coming out and stuff…” Peter mumbled.
His parents had always been very supportive of lgbtq+ rights, see the famous kiss his father had had on live television to piss off homophobes, so Peter had never had to worry about that kind of things, but it might have not been the case of Harry.
“What if Harry had not been ready to come out?” Peter asked bluntly.
Picturing Harry forced to come out to people because of Rhodey was making Peter go from deeply annoyed with Rhodey to actually angry. Peter could feel the anger rising inside of him, exactly like when his boxing teacher had pushed him to his limits.
“What if he had had bad experiences where he was forced to come out?”
Peter took a step forward, looking Rhodey in the eyes. His uncle was taller than him, but being shorter had not stopped Peter from trying to intimidate his boxing teacher either. Something flashed in Rhodey’s eyes before he spoke:
“I’m sorry. You’re right, I did not think about that. I can see now how it could have really hurt him.” Rhodey said, using his soft tone again.
Focusing on what his uncle had said, Peter tried to take deep breaths.
“Let me make it up to you, okay?”
“Go make it up to Harry.” Peter snapped.
He knew he was too angry with Rhodey to keep talking to him right now. He needed to calm down as soon as possible and their conversation was not helping. So, Peter took this opportunity to step back into his bedroom and close his door to his uncle’s face. He tried to calmy breathe, thinking back to his boxing teacher’s advice. After a while, Peter started to feel calm enough to think somewhat rationally again. He thought back to what his uncle had said. Peter had not at all considered the possibility that Rhodey might have thought Peter had lied to him about Harry. It would indeed somewhat explain his reaction. It did not negate what Peter had just told him, but he could relate to misunderstanding things. Peter had nearly ruined his friendship with Harry because he misunderstood something, so could he cast away Rhodey because had had made the same mistakes? In the end, it was Harry who could have been hurt very badly. Thus, Peter decided to wait to see how Rhodey would make it up to Harry before deciding how he was feeling about the situation.
Notes:
A few weeks ago, I made a Tumblr (because why not) but felt too awkward to share it properly. You can find me as wadelock on there. I'm not sure yet how much I'm actually going to use it, but I guess it can always be useful if I have to change last minute the posting schedule or if you want to see silly posts about me trying to make and follow a proper outline.
Chapter 26: The princess and the princes
Notes:
Hi, here is chapter 26. As always, I hope you will enjoy it! I actually wrote it before writing Peter and Harry confessing and having their first kiss because I really needed to write something cute. It was originally not going to be part of the fic, more like a bonus but I liked how it turned out and some things it introduces so much that I decided to turn it into a chapter.
Change in posting schedule: I am going to be posting a chapter once every two weeks instead of every week starting next chapter. This is because my chapters are becoming longer on average (there is, of course, the odd exception) which means I need more time to write them and edit/proofread them. If I end up with a big backlog, I will, of course, go back to weekly posting but for the sake of my sanity, it will be a chapter every two weeks for the foreseeable future.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
It was strange seeing Harry so casually dressed. Peter was used to him wearing suits and shirts, that kind of fancy clothing, not a sweater or sneakers. It made sense, though. They were going to spend all day walking in Disneyland, so they wanted to wear comfortable shoes, but also try to blend in with the crowd. True, their VIP tour guide made it so that was not going to fully happen, but they would still get less attention than if Harry was walking around in a suit and Peter wearing one of his Stark Industry jumpers. Then, they would definitely end up on some tabloid’s front page. Peter did not want that to happen for sure, all he wanted was to have a nice day with his friend. Or boyfriend, rather. This was their first official date, so Peter should get used to thinking of Harry as his boyfriend instead of his friend, especially when Harry had managed to organise this amazing date in less than two days.
“We are going to go the Haunted Mansion now. It is not too far from us.” The VIP guide said.
Peter nodded, and followed them, as they had done ever since they got to the park. They had just ridden Pirates of the Caribbean, which he quite liked.
“I hope it’s not too scary.” Harry joked, smiling at him.
“Oh, no, don’t worry. I think you guys are going to really enjoy it.” The guide replied.
Peter had done the attraction before, as he had gone to the parks with his parents in previous years, and it was indeed one of his favourite rides.
“I really like its ambiance.” He said.
The guide smiled.
“So, do I. It’s a great ride.” They replied.
As they walked, Peter felt a bit awkward. He was still trying to adjust to Harry being his boyfriend and not simply his friend. He had no idea how to interact with a friend but knew even less with a boyfriend. He kept wondering if he should try to hold his hand or do other typical couple stuff. They were in public and both of them were sons of famous people, so Peter was not sure if he should be careful or not. He knew his parents would not care if he held hands with a guy in public, or maybe they would even encourage him. He also knew he did not care if people saw him holding hands with Harry. He knew that no matter what, people would still give him a hard time just for being Tony Stark’s son, so them giving him flank for being into guys would at least spice things up and change from their usual rants. However, Peter had no idea how Harry felt about it. He had not thought about discussing it with him before going on their date. He should have had. He knew that Harry had a complicated relationship with his father and that that his father did not like Peter – the feeling was mutual – so dating rumours might not be the best thing for him. So, not wanting to put Harry in an awkward position, Peter decided to act as if they were just friends. As they got in front of the manor, Harry stopped to look at it. Peter stopped next to him, also taking the time to admire it.
“You’ll protect me against the ghosts, right?”
Peter looked at Harry who had his signature smile on. It, as always, made Peter blush.
“Of course.” He replied awkwardly.
Harry’s smile grew even bigger and even more irresistible. It made Peter want to taste his lips again. Peter had kissed Harry already a lot more than he would have ever thought he would.
“Then I am ready to go in, let’s go!” Harry said.
The tour guide nodded and led them through the lightning lane. It felt a bit awkward, but Peter was really grateful to not have to wait through all of the terribly long lines. As they got settled down on the ride, Peter felt Harry shuffling closer to him, making their sides touch. That felt quite comforting.
“You’re actually scared?” Peter whispered.
“Maybe.” Harry whispered back.
Peter could not see his boyfriend’s face, but he had a sneaking suspicion he was not actually scared. Nevertheless, he decided to wrap his arm around Harry’s waist, as he had started to get used to doing, trying to either comfort him or give him what he wanted. In response, Harry wrapped his own arm around Peter and started to mindlessly rub his side, as he would do to his hair. Peter tried to focus on the ride and not enjoy it a bit too much.
They proceeded to do a couple of more rides before their tour guide announced it was time to go see the princesses. Peter did not really care that much for them, as he was not a kid anymore and thus knew they were not real. To him, meeting them would only mean having an awkward interaction and taking some pictures, which were two things Peter tried to avoid. Harry, however, had announced that they simply had to go see them during their day at Disneyland. Peter would never have imagined that would be something that Harry Osborn of all people would want to do.
“Why do you want to meet them, again?” Peter asked.
Harry looked at him as if he was crazy.
“They’re princesses, Pete, you’re the one that’s weird, not wanting to meet a princess.”
Peter could not help but smile. He had to admit it, it was kind of cute seeing Harry acting like a kid.
“If you say so.”
They made their way to the princess hall and let their tour guide arrange things with the people working there.
“So, which one are you hoping we meet?” Peter asked.
Harry thought about it for a moment.
“Honestly, I would be happy to meet any of them.” He shrugged.
“Really? No preference?”
Harry nodded.
“What about you?” He then asked.
Peter smiled, amused he would return the question when he knew Peter did not care for princesses, but decided to think which one he liked the most.
“Meeting Mulan would be cool.” Peter finally replied. “Or Belle, I guess.”
Mulan was quite awesome, having saved her country and all, and Belle was into books, so maybe she could be into comics and things like that as well.
“Of course, that’s the two you would pick.” Harry said, smiling.
Peter looked at him.
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
Harry was staring at him so intently that Peter thought for a second he was about to kiss him. Harry would look at Peter like that quite often now that they were actually dating. Peter wondered if Harry had always been looking at him in this way and he had never noticed, if Harry had been careful to hide it or if this was something new.
“Nothing, you’re just being cute.”
Peter blushed, again. He was still not used to Harry calling him cute. Peter was about to try to think of a witty reply when their tour guide reappeared, telling them they could go in now. Harry was practically bouncing around like a little kid, which was quite the sight. Peter should probably get himself more familiarised with Disney princesses. They had to wait a couple of minutes again next to the room where the princess would be before finally being let in. Peter let Harry go in first, as he was the one who was excited to meet a princess. When Peter got in, he saw that the princess was Snow White. Peter felt, surprisingly, a bit disappointed that they did not get Belle or Mulan. This disappointment, however, quickly went away when Peter saw Harry’s face. He looked so happy.
“Well, hi!” Snow white said in a very high-pitched voice that nearly made Peter wince.
Harry rushed to her side, wearing the biggest smile Peter had ever seen on his face which completely melted his heart. It was one of the most beautiful sights in the world.
“Hello Snow white, it is such a pleasure to meet you.” Harry said.
If he had not known that his boyfriend was simply excited to meet a princess, not Snow White in particular, Peter could have started to feel jealous seeing him acting like such a gentleman to her.
“I’m also happy to meet you, I love making new friends!” The princess replied, offering her hand to Harry who took it. “What’s your name?”
“Harry!” He eagerly replied.
“Oh, that is a lovely name!” She smiled, still holding his hand, before looking a bit more serious. “Tell me, Harry, are you a prince?”
Peter smiled. Harry was indeed kind of a prince, at least by fairy-tale standards as he was not an actual prince, since he had not been born into a royal family. Harry was definitely beautiful, he would always wear nice clothes and had this elegance that nobody would ever be able to match. Of course, that was not all that he was: he also was so kind and thoughtful, really smart, and gentle. He had this way of making Peter feel like he could truly be himself around him. Peter knew Harry would not judge him and instead would try to understand and accommodate him. He was the perfect prince.
“I don’t know if I am, but Peter is definitely one!”
This made Peter go straight back down to earth. Had Harry really just called him a prince? Oh god, he could feel his face burn, having no idea how to process nor how to react to this.
“Really?” Snow White asked excitedly.
Harry nodded and Snow White looked at Peter, smiling at him. He tried to smile back but knew he probably looked as awkward as always. As Peter became more aware of his surroundings and himself, he realised how much to the side he was standing at. He was right next to the photographer which allowed him to see both Harry’s and Snow White’s faces. This had probably been a subconscious choice from wanting Harry to have his moment and Peter not feeling really comfortable. Snow White seemed to hesitate, still looking at him, before looking back at Harry.
“Is he your prince?” She asked in a soft voice.
Harry’s expression changed, but Peter could not figure out how exactly. It was still a really happy one, but it did look different. Harry nodded.
“He is.” He replied, still looking at Snow White.
Peter felt weird but in a good way. It was the first time they had told someone who was not his family that they were together. It also made him feel proud, that Harry would consider him his prince. Peter smiled, hoping his cheeks were not too red.
“That makes you a prince too, then!” Snow White replied.
Harry seemed to consider what she had just said for a bit.
“I guess you are right, I am a prince too.”
In Peter’s opinion, Harry was more of a prince than him by a long shot. It should be the other way around, Peter being a prince thanks to Harry, but it was not the right time to argue about that.
“You know, my prince saved me from an eternal sleep with a true love kiss, has your prince done something like that?” Snow White asked.
To Peter’s surprise, Harry enthusiastically nodded.
“He has! Our first kiss was also a magical one, it brought so much joy and life into me. It was a perfect kiss.”
Upon hearing that, Peter became completely red. He thought back to their first kiss and how passionate, if that was the right word for it, it had been. Peter wondered if first kisses were supposed to be this intense. They did not seem to be as passionate in fairytales, but they also rarely depicted one’s uncle interrupting the kiss, so Peter was not sure how accurate they were.
“Oh, that sounds so wonderful! He should definitely meet my prince; they would get along so well! Should we take pictures so I can tell him about the two lovely princes I met today?”
“Yes, let’s do that.” Harry smiled. “Come on, Prince Peter, get closer. You will not get out of taking pictures with us!”
Instinctively, Peter wanted to protest, not liking taking pictures at all, but Harry really seemed to want him to be in the pictures, and he was not going to let him down after he had called him a prince. So, Peter put on his big boy pants and joined them, listening to the photographer’s instructions on where to stand and simply copying Harry’s poses. They took a few pictures with some different poses, and then it was time to say goodbye to Snow White. They actually ended up seeing two other princesses, to Peter’s big surprise. Those were Mulan, who was indeed really cool, and Sleeping Beauty, who was also quite nice. As they left the Royal Hall, Harry was going on and on about how great it had been to be able to meet Snow White and how much he loved it. Peter looked at him talking so excitedly and full of joy, and thought back to what Harry had said about their kiss. Peter had not realised how much it had meant to him. Hell, he had not realised how much he himself meant to Harry. Peter had already been planning to do his best to protect him, but in this moment, he realised he would do anything to do so, no matter the cost. Whatever might happen, he would protect Harry Osborn.
Not able to resist the temptation anymore, Peter slowly and awkwardly took Harry’s hand as they walked. He held it very delicately, wanting to make sure Harry could pull his hand away if he wished to do so. Harry looked at him as if surprised, before mixing their fingers together and holding Peter’s hand a bit more firmly, clearly communicating that he wanted to hold hands. Peter could not help but smile, feeling reassured about the risk he had just taken.
“I… I’m so glad we decided to go on this date.” Harry said, before kissing Peter’s cheek for the first time.
Once again, Peter felt his face burn. God, how did Harry always manage to make him feel this way, as if he was about to spontaneously combust.
“Me too.” Peter smiled.
Their guide turned to them, as they had been walking a few feet in front of them.
“I think this would be a good time to get you guys a snack before we go on any more rides, so you’re not full when we go get dinner.” They said.
“Let’s do that then. What are the best snacks around here?” Harry asked.
“The Jolly Holiday Bakery Café has some really good sweet snacks and it’s near. Does that sound good to you?”
Peter nodded right away.
“I love sweet snacks.” He said.
“Of course you do, you’re one yourself.” Harry remarked, smiling.
To no one’s surprise, Peter blushed again. He was starting to think that Harry might been doing it on purpose.
“I just have a sweet tooth, okay?” Peter tried to defend himself.
Their guide seemed to be amused by their exchange, which Peter hoped was a good thing and not something he should be embarrassed about. They led them to the café and Peter ordered the Cherry-Vanilla Macaron whereas Harry went with the Chocolate Mousse Brownie. They also offered their guide to get them a snack and they finally accepted, choosing a Mickey-shaped Cookie. They then all sat down a bit off to the side to not be in the middle of all of the movement and started to enjoy their snack. Peter’s snack was delicious, he was really enjoying it. Harry must have noticed it as he asked:
“Is it good?”
Peter nodded, not able to reply verbally as he had his mouth full.
“Can I taste some of it then, please?” Harry then asked.
Peter nodded again and was about to try to figure out how to give a piece to Harry when the guy just… bit into Peter’s snack. Peter looked at him, not knowing if he should be surprised, offended, or find it somehow sweet. They had kissed before, multiple times, so it was not as if it would be weird for Harry to take a bite of his food, but it was still his snack! Harry, completely carefree and unaware of how Peter was looking at him, was nodding his head as he chewed, meaning he was liking the snack.
“You’re right, it is good!” He said after having swallowed the bite he took.
He then finally looked at Peter and noticed his expression.
“What? You want a bite of mine? It’s really good too, the chocolate is so nice.” Harry said, moving his snack closer to Peter.
Peter looked at him. He was still trying to process the fact that Harry had just taken a bite out of his snack but now, he also had to process the fact that Harry was offering him to do the same thing to him. Apparently, all of this was normal to Harry?
“Sure.” Peter said before awkwardly taking a bite out of Harry’s snack.
The chocolate was indeed really good, but it still felt so weird to do this, even more so in public. But oh well, if Harry thought it was normal, then it was probably normal.
“So?” Harry asked.
“It’s good too.” Peter replied, trying to act natural. “I quite like the chocolate.”
Harry smiled, satisfied, and they finished their own sweet snack.
They went on rides again, having a great time and holding hands again. Harry would usually be the one taking Peter’s hand, as if he had been wanting to hold hands with Peter but had waited for Peter to do it first. Peter was not sure if that was actually the case, as he could not really see a reason why Harry would have not just taken his hand if he had wanted to do so since the beginning. However, he did not really have the time to think about this too hard as he was too busy enjoying the rides and spending time with Harry. As the day went on, Peter started to feel a bit overstimulated by all the movement around him. It was particularly worse when they had to wait in lines, despite going through shorter ones thanks to lightning lanes. This was draining Peter’s energy, which was surprising. Ever since he had gotten bitten by that spider, he had noticed his endurance only getting better, but here, the bite was seemingly making it worse. Well, it would not be the only thing that his powers had made worse. Peter remembered how going to class felt horrible right after getting them. Since then, he had managed to learn how to deal with all the sounds and movements, but here, it was all too much for him. Peter wished he had thought of taking his noise-cancelling headphones with him.
“Are you okay, Peter?” Harry asked after glancing worryingly towards him a few times.
“Yes, I am just starting to get tired I think.” Peter replied forcing a smile.
All he wanted was to lock himself somewhere quiet and void of people, but he did not want to ruin the end of their day. They still had to see the fireworks.
“I was about to suggest we head to our reserved seating for the fireworks soon anyway. It will let us get there without having to rush and you guys will be able to get comfortably settled down before the show starts.” The guide said.
“That sounds good.” Peter nodded.
Hopefully, the reserved seating will be calmer than it was where they were right now. They started walking back towards the castle. They were all the way in Galaxy Edge, so they had quite a way to go. As they walked, Harry let go of Peter’s hand. Peter was about to ask if something was wrong, worried he had soured the mood, but Harry wrapped an arm around his waist before he was able to do so. Oh. Harry was worried about Peter being too tired and wanted to give him some support if he needed to. Peter blushed for what was probably the hundredth time that day and let himself get a bit closer to Harry. It did actually seem to help him a bit, giving him something to focus on. When they finally made it to the reserved seating, and after thanking and saying goodbye to their guide, Peter let himself flop onto his seat, not too unhappy about being able to sit down. Harry sat next to him, smiling.
“Better?” He asked.
Peter nodded. It was not the quiet and empty place he was wishing for, but they had at least a bit more space and he could breathe a little bit easier.
“Good.”
Peter scooted a bit closer to Harry, wanting to have their shoulders touching so he could focus once again on him. Harry seemed to take it as a sign of Peter wanting to get some more physical contact or affection, which was not completely wrong, as he rested his head on Peter’s shoulder. That felt nice, very nice. After thinking about it for a few seconds, Peter decided to rest his own head on Harry’s. God, that felt even better. His entire body relaxed. Despite all of the noise around them, he felt like he was about to actually fall asleep. He nearly did so, but the show started. Peter nearly jumped, luckily managing to not hurt Harry. They both went back to sitting straight and enjoyed the show. The show was, of course, amazing and they had a great view. This was the perfect end to their perfect date.
Once the show was over, they let the crowd leave, not wanting to have to fight to get out. When there were not as many people, they made their way to the car that was waiting for them, ready to drive them back to Malibu. It would take an hour or so, leaving them plenty of time to rest in the car. They quickly got settled in the car, saying hi to the driver, and then began their journey. The silence felt like pure bliss to Peter’s ears. It was as if someone had just removed the steaming iron that had been stuck against his head. With nothing inside of the car moving, as Harry was just watching the landscape through the window, Peter felt his entire body melt. He had not noticed how tensed his muscles had been before now. His sleepiness came back, and Peter knew that he was about to fall asleep this time for sure. Peter did not have the energy to try to find a comfortable position, but he did not want to mess up his neck. Well, Harry was right next to him, he could be useful.
“Can I use your shoulder as a pillow?” He asked in a surprisingly weak voice.
Harry turned his head to look at Peter, before offering him a soft smile, one that felt like his hugs.
“Of course you can, Peter.”
Not sure he would be able to stay awake for another second, Peter quickly rested his head on Harry’s shoulder and fell asleep right away.
Peter could feel movement around him. He would have normally jerked awake, but his mind still felt so sore. He did not want to stop sleeping, it felt so nice. He heard a clicking sound, but he was not sure what that had been. He then felt someone slowly grab him in a very gentle way before ending up against something warm. That is when he decided to try to wake up a bit more, wanting to understand what was happening. It was hard, as if his mind categorically refused to be awake. After some persistence, he managed to become more aware of what was happening. It felt like he was being carried. That was weird, he had not been carried ever since he was a child, and even then it had barely happened.
“Did you two have a good time?” Someone asked.
It was a woman’s voice. Peter knew that this voice brought him comfort, but he was not sure why.
“We did, yes, but I think it really drained Peter. I am going to carry him to bed.”
That came from the person that was carrying him, obviously. He knew that person as well, but who was it?
“Do you need a hand?” Another man asked.
“I should be okay, he is not that heavy, to be honest.”
As they moved again, Peter finally managed to open one of his eyes. He saw Harry’s face, all focused on what he was doing. Right, Harry. Peter was snuggled in against his chest, and Harry was… carrying him? Was Peter that light or was Harry that strong? Or both? It did feel nice though, having his head against Harry’s chest. It was a much better pillow than his shoulder for sure. Peter would gladly sleep against it.
“Well, if it isn’t Sleeping Beauty waking up!”
Peter groaned at the nickname.
“I could have walked, you know.” He replied.
Harry smiled. Peter was not sure why, if he was amused or if it was something else.
“I know, I just did not want to wake you up. You seemed exhausted.”
That was because Peter had indeed been exhausted. He still was.
“Thanks, I guess…”
Harry entered Peter’s room, which had sort of turned into their room ever since they admitted their feelings to each other. He then let him down softly on the bed.
“Thanks.” Peter said again.
Ignoring the nickname Harry had used for him, Peter did feel quite grateful and touched that Harry had carried him just to not wake up. He would have probably passed out on the couch if he had not.
“No problem.”
Peter kicked off his shoes, eager to just get into bed. Imagining how nice and warm he was going to feel under the covers, Peter removed his sweatshirt. He could probably just sleep in his tee-shirt and underwear, he had not sweat that much during the day and he was way too tired to properly get ready for bed and change into his pyjamas. Yeah, that sounded like a good plan. It was only after he had started to take off his trousers that Peter remembered a tiny little detail: he was going to share the bed with Harry and he was currently changing in front of him. Oh-oh, his trousers were already down, exposing his boxers. He had been bare chest in front of Harry in the past, but strangely, he had never been trousers-less in his presence before. Peter stared at his trousers, not sure what to do. There was little to no point in putting them back on now, and being in boxers was like being in a swimming trunk, right? He was also still wearing his tee shirt, it was not as if he was practically naked. He did not need to make it weird, it was not weird. Managing to convince himself of that, Peter finished taking off his trousers and looked towards Harry who was currently not making any sound. Harry was staring at him as if his own brain had stopped working. Why was he doing that? Had Peter made him uncomfortable by taking his trousers off? He hoped not! He did not think that Harry might not be okay with him being in his underwear.
“Sorry, I’ll put some pyjamas on.”
Harry finally stopped staring, snapping out of it, and he quickly shook his head.
“No, it’s okay, I don’t want you to waste more energy. I was just falling asleep mentally, I am a bit tired myself.” Harry explained, looking a bit weird.
If he had not been about to pass out from exhaustion, Peter would have still put on his pyjamas, not wanting to risk making Harry feel uncomfortable. However, Peter was really tired and did not want to fight with pyjama trousers right now, so instead he just got under the covers. It felt as nice as he imagined it. Harry went to brush his teeth, something that Peter should have done but was way too tired to do right now. Instead, Peter tried to find a good position to sleep in while leaving some space for Harry. Gone were the days he could sleep diagonally in his bed, but the sacrifice was worth it. He really liked knowing that Harry was next to him as he slept, it felt really reassuring. Harry then came back into the room, still dressed. That was odd, he would usually change in the bathroom right after brushing his teeth. Maybe he had forgotten to take his pyjamas with him? It did not matter, all that mattered to Peter was that he had found the perfect position… until he saw that Harry was changing right next to the bed. He was taking his sweater and shirt off, right out in the open. For a second, Peter thought that he was hallucinating due to being so tired, but that was until he laid eyes on Harry’s bare chest. Nope, that chest was all real, and it looked so touchable and kissable. It was perfect. He felt suddenly way too hot, as if the covers were trying to suffocate him, and realised he was rudely staring at Harry. What was wrong with him?! He quickly turned away, lying on his other side as to have his back to Harry. He then pushed some of the cover off him, trying to cool down a bit. Soon enough, the lights turned off and Harry got into bed with him. Peter was now in quite an awkward situation as he felt way too embarrassed to turn around, but now he was also way too awake to simply fall asleep.
“Pete?” Harry whispered.
“Mmmh?” Peter replied, pretending to be half-asleep, as he should be.
“Thanks for today.”
Peter turned around, finally getting the courage to do so, wanting to try to figure out why Harry was saying that. Unfortunately, it was way too dark for Peter to be able to see his boyfriend’s face.
“What do you mean?” He asked instead.
Peter heard Harry exhaling more air than he normally would.
“I meant that I had a great day, so thanks for suggesting we go to Disneyland.”
“Oh. I had a great day too, I am glad we went.” Peter replied.
Today had really been great indeed. Peter had never gone on a date before today, but he was pretty sure that what they just had would be what he considered his perfect date. He had had an amazing time hanging out with Harry and he felt like he was getting the hang of this whole “boyfriend” thing better.
“That is good to hear, Prince Pete.”
Peter had to fight a smile.
“Is this going to be my new nickname?” He asked.
“Yep.” Harry replied, sounding a bit too proud of himself.
“I guess there are worst nicknames in the world.”
“I am glad we agree.” Harry laughed.
It was a bit cringe, but it was still a nice and flattering nickname. Prince Pete. Harry’s prince. Peter liked that concept. He would be more than happy to be Harry’s prince, if that was what Harry wanted. Harry had been so happy to meet Snow White and had talked about Peter as his prince as if he was in his own fairy tale. Peter wanted to see that smile on his face again, it had been so pure and beautiful. For once, he was actually glad they had taken pictures. He could not wait to see them.
“Can I kiss you?” Peter asked.
Despite them having kissed so many times already, Peter still felt the need to ask each time. He really wanted to kiss Harry right now, his smile still stuck in his head.
“Yes, you can.” Harry replied, having learnt that telling Peter he did not have to ask before kissing him was useless.
Once he had figured out where they were, Peter softly kissed Harry’s lips, finding it still as intense and delicious as the first time. Kissing him was definitely something he was getting used to doing. He then backed away, being satisfied, and finally closed his eyes. Harry moved and Peter felt him trying to snuggle against him, similarly to what Peter had done while in his arms. Peter wrapped an arm around Harry and then immediately fell asleep.
Notes:
Funny story, during my summer vacation, I actually went to Disneyland California (not as a VIP, though, lol)! It was my first time there, and I had a lot of fun. I had written this chapter before going, and once there, I decided to do some “research” and go to the princess hall (it was definitely for research and not because I wanted to meet some princesses). Before going, I had thought you only got to meet one princess (I had looked up stuff online to write this chapter, but I must have gotten confused). However, when I went, I got to meet three of them (they were Snow White, Mulan and Jasmine. Funnily enough I had already written about Harry and Peter meeting Snow White and how Mulan was one of the two princesses Peter liked the most). Wanna know what my first thought was leaving the princess hall? “Shit, I need to edit my chapter.” So, if you’re wondering why I spent so much time describing their interaction with Snow White and then just mention them meeting two other princesses, that is why (and because the chapter was already quite long and I could not justify also describing their encounter with the other princesses).
Chapter 27: Oh my Darling
Notes:
Hi, here is chapter 27, yay! You know how I told you guys about my chapters getting longer and longer? Well, a couple of days after that, I finished writing chapter 31 (I’m now working on both chapters 33 and 34 – long story), and it is over 8k words. So yeah, some chapters are getting quite long, so be prepared.
Content Warnings
(Light) Mentions of homophobia
From “It was only when Peter started getting ready later in the afternoon” to “Harry smiled before working again on taming Peter’s hair”.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
There was truly no better way to start the last day of the year than to wake up with your boyfriend snuggled against you… only to then find out you are missing your trousers and ask yourself what the heck happened last night. Luckily, Peter quickly remembered that he had taken them off while getting ready for bed and that he had been too exhausted to put on some pyjamas. So, no, nobody had stolen his trousers while he was sleeping. As Peter's groggy mind went over the previous day’s events, Harry’s bare chest suddenly jumped at its forefront. It had been quite the sight, but it felt wrong to be thinking about it like that, so Peter quickly pushed it out of his mind and focused on his boyfriend’s sleeping face instead. He looked so peaceful, as he had never been worried a day in his life. It was such a beautiful sight that made Peter wish he could look at it forever, but it also confirmed what Harry had told him: Harry definitely slept better when they shared a bed. After a while, Harry started to move, meaning he was waking up. It had been their third night sharing a bed since admitting their feelings for each other, but it was the first time they had woken up so close to each other. Peter was not sure what to do. He knew that if he was in Harry’s shoes, he would panic feeling arms around him like that. He was also in his underwear, even if he still had a shirt on, so was it weird for him to be holding Harry like this? Deciding to play it safe, Peter started to remove his arms, but Harry made a noise as if he was unhappy and pressed his body even more against Peter’s. Okay, it seemed like Peter was actually not supposed to remove his arms from around Harry. He was also supposed to breathe, but that seemed counter-intuitive. Doing his best to take deep breaths, Peter put back his arms around Harry.
“Hello, Prince Pete.”
Harry was looking up at him, lying a bit lower in the bed than Peter to better snuggle against him. His eyes still looked half asleep eyes and he had an adorable smile on. Seeing him like this made Peter want to squeeze him in his arms, but he fought that urge.
“Hi…”
It seemed like Harry had finally settled on a new nickname for him. Ever since their own talk after “The Talk”, he had been trying different ones on Peter, but none had stuck until now. Peter should probably try to find him one too. It was what couples did, after all, they always had cute nicknames for each other.
“Prince Harry.”
No, that was already the name of a real person and thus sounded weird. What cute nicknames had Peter heard people use?
“Honey…”
That was an even bigger no; it was the nickname his mother would use for him, he could not use that one with Harry! Okay, what nicknames had he heard people in relationships call each other?
“Love?”
Oh god, it was probably way too early for that one. They had been dating for only a few days, he could not just call Harry “love”, he would find Peter way too clingy and weird.
“Darling.”
Darling sounded okay. It was a classic nickname, so it was neither cringey nor weird. It felt very strange to say it, but Peter would get used to it.
“Any of those are fine.” Harry laughed.
Since Harry seemed to be okay with being called “Darling” that was going to be the one Peter would use for him.
“Okay. Darling.”
Peter needed to practice calling Harry that, otherwise he probably would never remember to use the nickname. Harry smiled and then kissed him, making Peter’s heart jump a bit. Peter kissed him back, very much enjoying his morning so far. It was only when Peter’s stomach made the loudest noise it had ever made in all of his life that Harry broke off the kiss.
“We should probably go have breakfast.” Harry laughed, but it sounded a bit weird.
Had Harry been put off by the noise Peter’s stomach had made, or did he simply want Peter not to stay hungry?
“Probably, yes.” Peter said, trying to hide his embarrassment.
He let Harry go, removing his arms from around him and watched him go change in the bathroom. Peter knew he was probably just being embarrassed over nothing, all because he thought that Harry had “laughed weirdly”, but the sudden change from cuddling with Harry to him being alone in bed had really thrown him off and was making him feel worried. Maybe it was just a sound Harry did not like? Peter hated plenty of sounds that bodies could make, for example sniffing, that sound would drive him crazy. His stomach grumbling was not something he could really stop from happening, except by making sure he was never hungry, unlike sniffing, but he would still try to avoid it from happening if it did bother Harry. Harry would have probably told him so if that was the problem, as they were trying to be better at communicating. Thus, Peter would have to trust his boyfriend to tell him if he had indeed disliked that noise and for now assume that Harry just did not want him to stay hungry. Peter got out of bed to get ready as well and could hear some water running in the bathroom. Harry must have been taking a shower, which made sense as he would usually take them in the morning. Peter preferred showering in the evening when he had classes so he could wake up later, but during breaks, it really depended on what he had planned for his day. He had been way too exhausted to shower the previous night and he was probably not smelling great after walking all day. Maybe that was why Harry had run away to shower, not because of Peter’s weird stomach noise. No matter what had actually happened, Peter was going to shower before breakfast. Not wanting to wait for Harry to be done showering, even if he did not usually take long, Peter grabbed his things and went to another bathroom.
Breakfast was going to be delicious as Harry was making pancakes again. Trying to keep him entertained as he made the pancakes, Peter had started monologuing about their first date and about how much he had enjoyed it, even pointing out some of his favourite moments. As he did so, Harry listened to him with the biggest smile Peter had ever seen on him and would occasionally say a word or two to encourage him to keep going. Harry ended up finishing cooking the pancakes right as Peter was finishing talking about how awesome the fireworks had been. Harry quickly grabbed some toppings and went to sit next to his boyfriend.
“So yeah, the fireworks were even better than how I remembered them to be, and our spot was amazing!”
“They were indeed very impressive.” Harry replied, putting a pancake on Peter’s plate and then one on his. “I’m glad you liked our first date so much, I had an amazing time as well.”
“Thanks.” Peter started putting some Nutella on his pancake. “We should totally do this again, it was so fun!”
“Are you asking me out on a second date, Pete?” Harry asked, turning his head to look at Peter as he displayed his usual charming smile.
Despite having literally just spent way too much time talking Harry’s ear off about their first date, Peter started panicking and blushing way too hard, as if he was suddenly forgetting that Harry was his boyfriend. He even nearly replied that no, of course, he was not, before realising that Harry was his boyfriend now and they had an amazing first date, so yes, of course, he was.
“Yes.” Peter said, trying to sound confident and looking back at Harry. “Yes, I am asking you out on a second date.”
Harry’s smile widened and Peter felt the urge to just kiss him right there and then and to only stop when he would pass out from lack of air.
“It’s your turn to choose where we go. So, let me know where you want to go and I’ll organise everything.” Peter added, desperate to see Harry smiling for a bit longer.
This had definitely been the right move as Harry kept smiling. However, he also bit his lower lip towards its left corner, still smiling and looking at Peter. Peter was not sure what that meant, but he knew Harry was looking so damn cute right now.
“I can choose anywhere?” Harry asked, raising an eyebrow.
Peter knew that saying yes to this would mean risking going somewhere he would not really enjoy, like to a club or to something similar, but Harry was being way too charming to say no. Peter also trusted that his boyfriend would want him to also have a good time as otherwise the date would not be that great. Thus it was not probably too much of a stupid idea to agree anyway.
“Anywhere.” Peter replied before shoving a piece of pancake in his mouth before he could try backtracking.
“Mmm…” Harry seemed to ponder his options. “I’ll think about it for a bit and I’ll let you know once I’ve chosen.”
Peter would have obviously preferred knowing right away where Harry wanted to go for their second date so he could start planning and not worry about what Harry was going to choose, but it made sense for him to want some time to think about it. Peter would have to be patient and wait.
“Good morning to my kid and to my kid-in-law.”
Walking up the stairs that led to the workshop was Peter’s father smiling at them. Peter could not help but blush hearing Harry’s new nickname as it made it sound like they were married. Peter knew he should probably not complain about the nickname his father had chosen, though, as he would probably then come up with a much worse one.
“You guys got up late.” His father said as he sat down next to him. “Oh, pancakes. Do you mind if I steal some, kid-in-law, or are they reserved for my kid?”
“Of course you can have some, Tony, I’ve made plenty.”
Whereas Peter was slowly dying more and more every time his father would open his mouth, Harry seemed to be perfectly fine and comfortable. He was smiling at Peter’s father and grabbing him a plate as if he had not made several jokes about him dating his son. True, Harry was dating his son, but it was still embarrassing!
“Didn’t you already have breakfast?” Peter pointed out, trying to get some payback for the jokes.
“What are you, my dietitian?” His father replied, amused and taking a big bite out of his pancake.
“Maybe.”
“Good luck to you then, kid. You’re gonna need it.” He said as soon he had swallowed the piece of pancake. “Anyway, your mother and I need to meet some people before the gala tonight, but Rhodey’s going to the gala too so he’ll take you to it.”
Peter frowned, not because he was still mad a Rhodey, but because he had no idea what his father was talking about. Harry was looking at him, seemingly as confused as him.
“What gala?” Peter asked.
This made his father look equally confused as them. Great, they were now three confused idiots looking at each other.
“What do you mean what gala?” His father asked back. “The New Year’s Eve gala for which we received the invitation even before we dropped you off at MIT! It’s not like we go to that gala every single year…”
Right, yes, that dreadful gala that would always end so late because of the countdown to midnight and which would make Peter pull every excuse out of the book to try to avoid it. How could he have forgotten about it?! He must have gotten too excited with Harry coming over for the holidays, making it slip his mind. Oh no, he had forgotten to tell Harry about it, he was going to be so annoyed at Peter.
“Fuck, I completely forgot about it!”
“Language, kid.”
Peter looked at Harry, looking for signs he was annoyed or mad at him. If Peter had warned him in advance, Harry would have been able to pack a good enough suit and would have been able to come with them to the gala if he had wished to do so. Instead, Peter had messed up and now Harry was going to have to spend New Year’s Eve alone. Could Peter maybe get out of having to go to the gala and instead spend the evening with Harry to try to make it up to him? However, that would mean letting his family down and not spending New Year’s Eve with them. Would they be mad at him? Probably. Peter was trapped, having to disappoint someone dear to him no matter what he chose to do.
“I’m sorry, I should have let you know. You didn’t pack a suit because of me and…”
“Yes, I did.” Harry cut him off.
“You… what?”
Had Harry really taken a fancy suit with him to a chill Christmas vacation? Well, if there was one person Peter knew who would do that, it would be Harry. Peter’s parents might also do something like that. Was Peter the only unprepared one? He would have to figure this out later.
“I packed one just in case something came up.” Harry shrugged but seemed a bit redder than usual. Peter wondered why. “I figured it wouldn’t hurt.”
That was unexpected but it was some very good news. Peter had not messed up too badly it seemed.
“Okay, good.”
Peter relaxed a bit, letting out a sigh of relief, but then noticed his father staring at him with big eyes and glancing at Harry. What now? What had Peter done? Harry was looking at him too, as if he was waiting for something. Peter was not sure what was happening, Harry had a suit so he could come, so what needed to be fixed now? Based on his father’s glances, Peter still needed to do something related to Harry, and probably related to the gala… Something Harry was expecting too… Peter thought back to their conversations, trying to figure out what he could have missed. Right, he had not offered Harry to join them. He had been so relieved to know he had not messed up, that it slipped his mind, too focused on the fact that everything was alright. He might have also assumed that Harry would know he was invited, based on Peter’s freak out and on how they had done their best to include him in everything, but Peter should know better. He, too, sometimes needed to be explicitly told things.
“You can come to the gala with us…” Peter started but his father shook his head on the last word.
If Harry was not supposed to come to the gala with them, then who was he supposed to go with? With Peter specifically?
“With me?” Peter’s father nodded but still seemed to expect more.
Peter thought about what he knew about those galas. Harry would go as a plus one, his parents had apparently arranged for that already. People did bring plus ones sometimes, or even often, but it was usually their partners… Oh! Peter got it! He cleared out his throat and looked back to Harry.
“Will you go to the gala with me, as my date?” Peter said, mustering as much confidence as he could.
Despite being pretty sure it was the right thing to say, Peter quickly shot his father a glance. He smiled and nodded, meaning it was. Peter looked back to Harry who was smiling too.
“I absolutely would, Peter.”
Harry took one of his hands and Peter felt his heart skip a bit. It was silly, but this gesture felt so special to him, even if it was a bit embarrassing in front of his father. Speaking of Peter being embarrassed in front of his father…
“It wouldn’t count as our second date, though. You can still pick where we go for that.” Peter felt the need to add.
It would not be fair to Harry if the gala stole his opportunity to choose where they went on their second date. Yes, Harry was going to the gala as his date, but was it really a date when it was something Peter had to go to? Probably not, so it made sense to not consider it as their second date anyway.
“Okay, thank you, Pete.” Harry smiled again and started leaning in towards Peter but stopped and squeezed Peter’s hand instead. He then turned to Peter’s father. “I will need to borrow a bow tie, if that’s okay, I only brought a tie with me.”
“Of course, go nuts and borrow anything you need from me. Peter will show you where everything is.” Peter’s father replied before patting his son’s shoulder, which was strange as he would usually do that when he was proud of him. “Anyway, I’ve got to run, Pep’s waiting for me. I’ll see you guys for lunch.”
They watched Peter’s father disappear towards the house’s entrance, probably to get into a car, and as soon as he was out of sight, Harry stole a kiss from Peter. It was a quick one, barely lasting a second, but Harry’s lips pressed against his with such urgency, making Peter’s stomach feel weird. He wondered how long Harry had been holding in that kiss.
“I’m sorry, I’m just so excited.” Harry explained, passing a hand through his hair. “We’ve got a second date planned, I’m your date to tonight’s gala and our first date yesterday was wonderful. It makes me so happy.”
“It’s fine.” Peter replied, smiling.
Peter loved hearing Harry saying those things because he too was feeling this way. It felt reassuring that it was not some one-sided feeling. To show he meant it when he said it was fine, and because he really wanted to after being kissed by Harry like that, Peter too stole a kiss from Harry. He was getting better at it as it was feeling less and less awkward. Practice did make perfect it seems.
It was only when Peter started getting ready later in the afternoon that he realised the implications of having Harry as his date for the gala. It was one thing to go around Disneyland acting all lovey-dovey while wearing clothes that did not make them stand out, it was another to go to a gala full of judgy people as each other’s date. They would not be two random guys holding hands or biting into each other’s food, they would be Peter Stark and Harry Osborn being an item. This worried Peter for multiple reasons. Firstly, there was the obvious fact they were both guys. Homophobia had never had an impact on Peter’s life, so much so he was more surprised that he liked anyone than that the person he liked was a guy, but it did not mean it might not be a problem during the gala. They were going to be around a bunch of old people, should he be worried about some of their opinions? The “Talk” had not prepared him for that. Secondly, there was the other, and even more obvious, fact he was a Stark and Harry was an Osborn. Their fathers' companies were not in direct competition, but it was still a notable fact, especially when their fathers seemed to dislike each other. Was Harry not worried about his father hearing about it and being upset by it? He had seemed to want to placate him as much as possible when Peter had met him and this would have the complete opposite effect.
“You’re okay, Prince Pete?”
Harry was getting ready alongside Peter and he seemed to be basically done. He was looking absolutely stunning in his suit. Peter was still a bit confused about why he had bought it with him, but he was glad he had done so… or was he? Maybe it would have been better if he had not and if they were instead having a chill evening just the two of them.
“Yeah, yeah…” He replied absent-mindedly.
The bow tie Peter’s father was lending to Harry was matching perfectly with his suit. True, it was because they were both black, aka the most common colour for a suit, but still, it somehow made Harry’s eyes really pop out, whatever that meant. His hair was also looking perfect, with not a single hair out of place. Peter did prefer his fake messy hair, but it would not be appropriate here. What he preferred over everything else, when it came to Harry’s hairstyle, was his truly messy hair, how it looked when he had just woken up, but he was not going to think about that right now. It was definitely not the time to think about how it looked and how it made him feel. When it came to Peter, everything looked the complete opposite. His suit looked weird on him, making him feel like he was being suffocated while appearing too loose on his body. His hair was a true mess, but not a good-looking one like Harry’s, and he could not manage to tie his bow tie for the life of him. His hands were way too sticky to let him get ready properly, and trying to relax and get rid of the problem only made him even stickier. Why had his parents not just bought him an already tied bow tie?!
“Are you sure you don’t want any help?”
“Yeah, sure…”
It was not supposed to be that hard, his father had taught him how to tie his bow tie, so why could he not just do it now? He had done it year after year. If it was not for his stupid sticky fingers, his hair would not be a mess and he would have already finished getting ready. That cursed lab was running his life yet again. Why could he not have a normal winter break?! Instead, he was worrying his father by being so jumpy, he had gotten so overstimulated that Harry had to carry him to bed, he had gotten madder at Uncle Rhodey than he had ever been before and now he could not even look decent for the gala. How was that fair?! His frustration finally took over and he threw the bow tie on the bed, letting out a frustrated groan. Stupid bow tie, stupid lab.
“Okay, you’re sitting down and talking to me.” Harry ordered. “Let me take care of your bow tie and hair.”
Not wanting to get in a fight with Harry, Peter obeyed and sat down on his chair. Harry disappeared quickly into the bathroom and came back with Peter’s comb and some of his own hair product. He then made Peter scoot a bit closer to the bed and stood behind him, between the chair and the desk.
“What’s bothering you?” Harry asked him as he started combing Peter’s hair.
“Nothing.” Peter replied for some odd reason.
He was not sure why he did not want to tell Harry about his worries. Maybe he had gotten used to hiding them, as he did with the friends situation and now with the lab. Should he be worried about this new habit? No, it was a logical one, it was to protect the people who were the most important to him.
“Peter…” Harry stood in front of him to look him in the eyes. “Something is clearly bothering you and I want us to talk about it. Talking about things is healthy, if we had properly talked about…” Harry paused for a second. “our feelings properly then we would have avoided a messy situation.”
Harry did have a point. Having an honest conversation the morning after the disastrous dinner would have made them admit their feelings much earlier on and would have prevented a lot of pain. Not only that, but what Peter was worrying Peter also concerned Harry. Thus, talking to him about it would actually help. Peter took a deep breath. For their relationship to work, they both needed to make efforts, so he was going to make one.
“I am worried…” Peter tried to find the right words. “Are you sure you want to be my date for the gala? Officially, I mean? Or did I misunderstand and you wanted to be my unofficial date?”
Peter looked at his boyfriend, trying to gauge his reaction. He seemed surprised, but his face quickly softened.
“Why would I not want to officially be your date?” He asked as he stepped back behind Peter and started working on his hair.
Harry’s hand on his head as he combed through the mess that was Peter’s hair felt nice. Being touched by Harry would often bring comfort to Peter, and it very much did so right now. Peter was not sure which of the two reasons he should bring up to Harry. He thought about it for a bit, weighing the advantages and disadvantages of each option, and then decided to bring up his worries about Harry’s father. Peter could protect Harry from bigoted people, but could he really protect him against his father?
“Your father could hear about it, and he doesn’t seem to like me very much…”
Truth be told, Peter liked him even less. Harry’s hands stopped and Peter felt his heart drop. He had done it again, he had said the wrong thing. He was about to apologise when he felt Harry rest his hands on his shoulders, stroking them with his thumbs.
“Peter… I don’t care if my father hears about it.” Harry paused and removed his hands from Peter’s shoulders, stepping in front of him instead. “I do want to be your official date to the gala and I want us to have a good time there without worrying about what my father may or may not hear and think.”
Harry looked him in the eyes. This time, instead of feeling like Harry was trying to look into his soul, Peter only felt a comforting sensation. Harry’s eyes were beautiful now that Peter was looking at them properly. He should spend some time fully discovering and admiring them.
“Okay.” Peter replied. “You’ll be my official date then.”
Harry smiled before working again on taming Peter’s hair. Peter tried to relax, pushing down his worries and focusing on Harry’s touches. As he let him work with all of his fancy hair products, Peter could not help but wonder again why Harry had brought such a fancy suit with him. How Harry was standing so close to him, fully inside of Peter’s personal space, and looking so focused when he would step in front of him definitely did not help Peter control his thoughts. Thus, by the time Harry was done with Peter’s hair and was tying his bow tie, Peter could not hold the question in anymore.
“Why did you bring your suit with you?” Peter finally blurted out.
Harry’s eyes widened and his face turned quite red. Peter could have understood him being surprised by Peter’s seemingly sudden and random question, but there was more to it. It was not every day that Harry would make such a face. Peter had seen him blush three times now, and he had been somewhat responsible for two of those instances. Yes, he was keeping track of that. Peter stared at his boyfriend, confused by his reaction.
“Are you blushing?” Peter asked as he had no idea what else to say.
“No, I…” Harry tried to speak but was stumbling on his words.
Peter had never seen him in such a state. Even when he had been embarrassed about their hug during their self-care afternoon and evening he had been more composed. For some reason, Peter was finding Harry’s reaction and face adorable. Maybe he had been right suspecting that Harry was making him blush on purpose, and maybe it was time for Peter to have his revenge. How would he do that, though? He had only ever made Harry blush on accident, never on purpose before. Well, clearly, asking him about his nice outfit had worked, so Peter could use that and simply add a little extra touch to it?
“Did you want to dress well for me…” Peter leaned in a bit towards his ear, figuring it would help him make Harry blush as it would certainly make him blush. “Darling?”
“Fucking hell, Pete…” Harry whispered in a way that made Peter’s stomach feel weird.
What had Peter done to make Harry actually swear? He had just learned it and he had not said anything crazy. Peter looked back at his boyfriend’s face properly and saw that Harry had turned an even brighter shade of red. Peter had been a bit too good at getting his revenge, it seemed. Oh god, what had he done? Peter felt his own face burn as he stared at Harry’s, having no idea what to say or do now. They silently stared at one another for a few seconds, with still so very little space between them, before that Harry stepped back and cleared his throat. His right hand shot up and moved towards his face, but then stopped and Harry let it fall back down. Had he been about to run a hand through his hair as he sometimes did but then had stopped because it would mess up his hair? If so, Peter was glad Harry had realised before he had let Peter ruin his hair.
“We should go.” Harry said as he looked away from Peter. “Your uncle is probably waiting for us.”
Had Peter pushed Harry too far? He clearly seemed embarrassed, but thankfully not traumatised either.
“Right. Sorry if I…”
“It’s fine, Pete.” Harry cut him off. As he looked back towards him.
Harry then gave him a small smile.
“Don’t worry about it.” He said as he offered his arm to Peter. “Should we?”
Peter looked at Harry’s arm. He was probably supposed to take it as that was what people would do at galas, but it was usually a woman taking a man’s arm and they were not at the gala yet, so would it be weird? Well, Peter was definitely weird. He had been super weird even before getting superpowers from a damn spider, so who cared if it was weird? He took Harry’s arm and tried his best to return his smile.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
Notes:
Thank you guys for reading, chapter 28 will be posted in two weeks, so on the 6th of October.
Your comments and kudos are, as always, so very much appreciated!
Chapter 28: The gala
Notes:
I’m starting to get some chapter backlog (I have just finished what should be chapter 36) but I have started writing the trickiest part of the story. Thus, I need this backlog to be able to edit things if needed without freaking out about the fact that I’ve already posted the chapter where x thing happened/where I mentioned y thing. All of that to say: I’m going to stick to the one chapter every two weeks schedule despite the progress I’m making. I’m expecting the story to be more than 42 chapters long (I know exactly what happens in chapters 37, 38 and 39 and I would be _quite_ surprised if everything I have planned to happen after that only takes 3 more chapters). I’m getting closer and closer to the hand of the story, and I am both excited and terrified.
As a heads up, next chapter (chapter 29 which I will be posting in two weeks, on the 20th of October) is on the smaller side, but the next two chapters after that one (chapter 30 and 31) are quite big, so hopefully they will make up for chapter 29 being small.Content Warnings
General vague mentions of homophobia
Mentions of forced coming out
From “I told him I was angry at him” to “Uncle Rhodey had defended Harry”
Chapter Text
People were staring at them, but Peter found himself caring less than he had expected to. He was with Harry and that was all that mattered. Now that he was feeling a bit less stressed, he could really appreciate how dashing Harry looked in his suit. Peter had seen him in plenty of suits before, but this one really took the cake. Maybe people were not staring because they were Harry Osborn and Peter Stark going to a gala as each other’s date, but because Harry was looking so handsome. Yeah, Peter was going to go with that explanation. Speaking of Harry, he was holding Peter’s arm as they made their way inside the event’s main room and he was looking completely at ease. Peter wished he could steal some of his confidence. At least, having Uncle Rhodey walking by his other side felt reassuring, even if Peter was still somewhat mad at him.
“I’m sure they’re all so jealous that I’ve scored the cutest date to the gala.” Harry whispered in his ear low enough that nobody would hear him under all the noise of people talking.
Peter let out what was a mix between a chuckle and a cough, his brain not knowing if it should be amused or embarrassed.
“Right.” He replied sarcastically.
He was anything but the cutest date here, but it would be a lie to say he had not appreciated Harry’s attempt at lighting the mood. Peter shot a look at Harry who seemed to be scanning the crowd while maintaining a polite smile. He then looked at Uncle Rhodey who, coincidentally, was also scanning the crowd but with a much more serious expression. Should Peter also be scanning the crowd? He was unsure what he would be looking for, but if both of them were doing it, there was probably a good reason to do it.
“I’ve spotted your parents.” Uncle Rhodey said as he stepped slightly closer to Peter. “Let’s join them.”
That definitely sounded like a good idea. The more people around Peter that he was comfortable with, the better. Peter nodded and they made their way to them. His father was wearing a suit that, to Peter, looked like any of his other Gala suits, and his mother was wearing a blue dress with her hair let down. When Peter’s parents finally turned towards them, he saw the both of them make a weird face, as if they had forgotten how to breathe or something, before whispering something to each other. Weird, Peter wondered what that was about.
“You guys look great!” Peter’s mother said when they were finally in earshot. “Did you take a picture before leaving?”
“No.” Peter replied.
He should have guessed his parents would want to have a picture of the two of them well-dressed, they loved taking family pictures.
“We’ll take a quick one after the gala.” His father said as he placed a hand on the side of his wife’s shoulder before turning to Harry. “You did his hair, didn’t you?”
“I did.” Harry nodded.
“You did a great job. He never lets me do his hair for galas, I guess he likes you more than me.”
His father winked at Harry, and Peter had the urge to try to make him disappear under a table so he would stop embarrassing him.
“Anyway.” Peter cut in, desperate to change the topic of conversation.
“Should we go dance, Tony?” Peter’s mother asked with a smile before whispering something to him.
“You know I never decline an opportunity to dance with you, Hon.” He replied, giving her a smile full of love before turning to Rhodey. “Don’t spend the entire night babysitting the kids, okay? Have some fun too.”
Were his parents trying to ensure that Harry and Peter would end up hanging out alone? Why? They would usually let Peter stick with them. Were they trying to let them spend a nice fancy evening together? That would be nice… right? It would be scary to be without his family in the middle of all of those judgy strangers, but it would also be Peter’s chance to kind of act like a prince to Harry. Harry would surely love that.
“Don’t worry, Tony, I’m not a babysitter.” Rhodey replied, but for some reason, Peter had a feeling babysitting them was his plan for the night.
Peter’s parents left and he found himself once again standing awkwardly between his uncle and his boyfriend. Harry was still holding his arm, which was definitely raising some eyebrows, but Peter was not planning on letting go. Instead, he slightly pressed the hand Harry had put on his arm against his side, as the physical contact was really helping him to stay grounded and not get overwhelmed by all the stares and the noise. Harry must have noticed, as he tightened his grip on Peter’s arm. Peter felt extra thankful for that. Getting a bit more grounded again, Peter focused on what he should do now that his parents had left. Harry was with him, as his date, so Peter should try to act like a good date to him. He was about to ponder what it meant to be “a good date” at a gala when Rhodey spoke.
“Can you go get me a glass of water, Peter?”
His voice sounded urgent as if he really needed that glass of water as soon as possible. Peter looked at him, worried he was unwell or had something wrong with his throat, but he seemed physically fine. He was, however, staring at something with a scowl on his face. Peter followed his gaze to see a man approaching. He had dark blondish hair and seemed around Peter’s parents' and uncle's age. Peter did not remember ever seeing him before but he sucked at remembering faces, so who knew, maybe they had previously met.
“Now, please.” Rhodey said, using the tone he would use when Peter needed to obey without asking questions.
Peter might still be mad at him, but he still trusted him and his judgment. For a reason unknown to Peter, Rhodey wanted him out of here before the man reached them, and he had no time to ask him about it. If Rhodey wanted him gone, he would be gone, but what about Harry? Peter looked back at him and Harry nodded and removed his arm from around Peter’s arm, as if he had read what Peter was thinking off of his face. Did he too know the man? Or was he also trusting Rhodey on this one? Not having the time to try to figure out which of those two options was correct, Peter started moving to the bar.
“Right, I’ll get you a glass of water, Uncle Rhodey.” He said, trying to sound casual and not look like he was running away, even though he was.
Only once he had reached the bar did Peter let himself turn back towards Harry and Rhodey. They were talking with the man. Harry seemed to have a polite conversation with him, but Rhodey was still clearly not happy based on how straight he was standing. Peter quickly looked away to politely request a glass of water at the bar, figuring it would be weird if he did not do so. When he looked back, Harry had his mouth open and it was staying open, meaning he was not simply just talking and his upper half was tilted backwards. Was he offended? Oh no, what had the man done? Peter watched as the conversation seemed to resume, but with a lot more hand movements, as if they were arguing. Should Peter step in and help his uncle and boyfriend?
“Here's your water, sir.”
Peter quickly looked back at the person behind the bar he had talked to and who was now handing him a glass.
“Right, thanks.”
He hurried to take it and looked back at the possible commotion. Rhodey was now standing in front of Harry with his arms crossed and looking pissed, despite the distance separating them. Oh, something bad had definitely been said and Peter should get his butt over there immediately to also defend his boyfriend. By the time Peter made it to them, not being able to walk at full speed because of the glass of water he was carrying, the man was gone and Rhodey had a hand on Harry’s shoulder, as if he was comforting him. That was… surprising.
“Thank you, I really appreciate it.” Harry said.
Harry looked shaken up, his smile was gone and Peter could see his jaw was tensed.
“It’s okay. Don’t let his words get to you, he’s a dumbass.” Uncle Rhodey replied as he squeezed Harry’s shoulder, sounding angry.
Had Peter travelled between universes or dimensions? Just a few days ago Uncle Rhodey was menacing Harry, trying to scare him off, and spilling the beans about their kiss, and now he was comforting Harry. Of course, Peter would be happy if they suddenly developed an amiable relationship, even an amicable one would make Peter happy, he was just very confused about what was happening at the moment.
“I’ve got your glass of water…” Peter said before turning to Harry. “Are you okay? Who was that guy? What did he say to you?”
Surprisingly, Harry and Rhodey shared a look. Okay, that was weird, really weird. What on earth had the man said to get them to suddenly somehow get along? Well, the conversation had seemed heated, so an argument had probably happened. Harry seemed someone upset, and Rhodey had stepped in front of him. The man must have said something hurtful to Harry, right? He had said something mean to Harry, and it had struck a nerve in Uncle Rhodey who had then stepped in to defend him and even comfort him. What the fuck had that guy said to Harry that was bad enough for Rhodey to step in, and could Peter go and give him a piece of his mind?
“I’ll take that. Thank you, Peter.”
Peter felt something tug his arm forward, and only then did he realise he was gripping the glass hard, not letting his uncle take it. Shit, with his strength still increasing Peter had been lucky he had not broken the glass. He should be more careful if he did not want his family to start asking questions about it. He let the glass go and Peter saw a wave of relief on his uncle’s face. Right, he definitely needed to be more careful about controlling his strength.
“I’m gonna get some air, but I’ll stay near the entrance if you guys need me, okay? Don’t hesitate to come get me.” Uncle Rhodey said, looking at both Harry and Peter with a serious expression.
The message was pretty clear: if the asshole came back for round two, they were to go get Uncle Rhodey instead of getting themselves in trouble. Peter simply nodded, so did Harry, and then watched his uncle walk away. Once Uncle Rhodey had disappeared in the crowd, Peter turned back to Harry. He looked at him, trying to gage how upset he was, but he was shit at that.
“I’m okay, Pete, really.” Harry assured him as he put a hand on Peter’s arm and squeezed it a bit. “I promise. I just want to enjoy the rest of our night and not let this unpleasant interaction sour it.”
Not yet convinced by what his boyfriend was saying, Peter studied his face a bit more. Harry did seem more or less okay now, not as shaken up as when Peter had joined them with the glass of water. Peter still wanted to go after the dick who had hurt his boyfriend, and tell him something clever and eloquent like “Fuck you, dick”, but he knew it would make a scene and Harry did really seem to want them to go on with their evening. Peter would have to push his anger down and do his best to ensure that Harry still had a good night.
“Okay…” He replied before taking a deep breath. “What do you want to do then? I normally hide the entire time or just hang out with my parents, but that’s probably not what you usually do so…”
“We could dance.” Harry said, softly smiling. “I’d love to dance with such a handsome man as yourself.”
Being in a relationship with him did not help Peter not to blush at Harry’s flirtatious remarks. Peter felt like he was blushing even more now that they were boyfriends. Was it because Harry was getting more and more outrageous and straightforward in his remarks, or was it because Peter knew he actually meant what he was saying? He would sure as hell not ask Harry that as it would only encourage him to be worse. At least, Peter was now learning how to make his boyfriend blush too, so, hopefully soon, he would have a way to get some revenge.
“Harry… I don’t know how to dance.”
Peter would have loved to dance with Harry, as that would definitely be something a prince would do and thus Peter would be able to make Harry feel as if he was in a fairytale, which was something he deserved so very much to experience. Unfortunately, Peter was shit at dancing, probably due to his poor coordination. To be honest, he had not really tried that hard to learn, even though his parents had offered multiple times to teach him, but he knew himself enough to know it would be a disaster.
“I’m sorry.” Peter added, because he really was.
“I can lead and teach you, Pete.” Harry replied, his thumb now slowly rubbing Peter’s arm. “You’d just have to follow the steps I show you, and if you’re really not feeling it, we can stop and go chat until your family joins us again.”
On one hand, Peter knew this was a bad idea, that they would just embarrass themselves in front of judgy and gossipy people. On the other, he wanted really, really, badly to be Harry’s Prince Charming.
“I can try, I guess…”
Oh god, Peter was already regretting this decision, he was going to disgrace all the Starks, Potts and even the Rhodes that came before him. However, seeing how Harry’s face lit up and displayed the same smile that a child would have when you agreed to give them their favourite thing in the world, Peter did not dream of taking it back.
“Okay, okay…” Harry said, clearly trying to contain his excitement. Peter wondered if that was what he looked like when talking about Doctor Who and such things. “You’re going to see, it’s not that complicated. You just need to loosen up so you don’t fight me without meaning to when I am trying to lead you.”
Right, he needed to loosen up while doing something very likely to make Peter a fool of himself for the first time. Harry was right, that did not seem complicated at all! Peter decided to keep his sarcastic remark to himself and instead nodded. Harry then offered him his arm, and Peter had to take a deep breath before taking it. It was fine, everything was fine. He was with Harry, Harry was proud to be his date, his parents were hopefully still dancing so they would not be too far from them, and they could always run to Uncle Rhodey if they had a problem. When they reached where other people were dancing, Peter quickly scanned the crowd to try to spot his parents. Unfortunately, there were too many people, and Peter did not want to leave himself enough time to start thinking about running away. So, when Harry offered him his hand, he took it and found himself on the dancefloor.
“Put your hand on my arm, near my shoulder.” Harry said.
Peter could barely hear him over the sound his own heart beating in his ears, being so damn loud. Peter really needed to chill, it was just a dance, and had done much scarier things in the past, like breaking into a lab or stepping in as some girl was about to get punched.
“Okay…” Peter said as he obeyed, hopefully gripping Harry’s arm not too hard.
Harry had already put his hand on Peter’s waist, but he was only now realising how strange it felt there. It was not unpleasant, no, that was not the right word to describe it. It was more that it felt very much foreign. Peter was pretty sure that Harry had never put his hand there before, not even when they had been cuddling in bed – oh god, they had cuddled in bed – just this morning. It was fine, Peter was going to focus on Harry’s face, and everything was going to be fine. Harry was still smiling like a little kid, which was helping Peter very much to relax. Them holding hands did also help quite a lot, so that was nice.
“Now, we just go like this.” He said before starting to slowly sway side to side.
Peter did his best to follow him, and quickly realised it was a bit like what his boxing teacher had taught him. He was moving his weight around, shifting it from one foot to another. The sort of rocking from one side to another also felt quite soothing, Peter definitely enjoyed its repetitiveness.
“You’re doing great, Pete.” Harry smiled as Peter tried not to blush, making him really wonder if he was doing it on purpose. He must be. “Now let’s try to move a bit around. We’re sticking with small steps, alright?”
Just when Peter was getting comfortable with the whole swaying from one side to the other, steps were getting thrown in. Great. Okay, Peter could do this. Small steps and shifting one’s weight from one side to another, that was a bit like a mix of what he had learnt in his boxing class. Obviously, the objective was much different here, as he was not trying to avoid punches but instead have a good time with Harry, but it should still help. Peter used his training as he followed Harry’s steps, doing his best to not actually jump around as he had learnt to, and let himself be guided by Harry’s hand on his waist. They were now moving around and Peter had not yet stumbled or stepped on one of Harry’s feet. What a miracle.
“For someone who claimed not to know how to dance, you’re doing amazing.” Harry leaned in a bit, making Peter’s heart definitely skip a beat. “Prince Pete.”
“Thanks…” Peter said before forcing himself to add that last part. “Darling.”
Harry’s smile widened and he looked away for a second before looking back to Peter.
“I’m so glad you invited me. I feel like I’m at a ball with my prince charming.” Harry shook his head, looking down but still smiling. “Sorry, I am being so corny.”
“It’s fine.” Peter quickly said.
It was more than fine, Peter loved seeing Harry like this, it made his stomach feel all weird but filled him with so much happiness.
“It’s…” Peter searched for the right word. “Cute.”
‘Cute’ would have to do. After all, Harry had called Peter that in the past, so it could not be that bad of a choice of word.
“You’re being cute.” Peter summed up with a bit more confidence.
Harry looked back at him, smiling, and for just a moment, he looked like he was about to kiss Peter. Peter held his breath but nothing came. Instead, they kept swaying as they slowly moved around. It seems like he had read Harry’s face wrong. That was fine, Peter had gotten plenty of kisses from him before and, hopefully, he would get more in the future. He really hoped he would. They kept on dancing without talking for a while, and Peter was really starting to get the appeal of it. Once you had the steps and the rhythm down, it was really relaxing. He could do this all night, as long as his or Harry’s feet or legs did not start hurting. It had been a while since Peter had last spoken when Harry decided to bring up a new topic of conversation:
“I know it’s not really my place to say this, so you can tell me off if you wish to and I won’t bring it up again, but your uncle is really trying.”
Peter looked at him, slightly confused as he had been lost deep in his thoughts.
“Sorry?”
“Your Uncle Rhodey.” Harry clarified. “I’m not sure what happened between you two, and it is none of my business, but he has been trying hard to be nice to me and he has been treating me like part of your family for the past couple of days. I’ve noticed that he does it mostly when you’re not around, so I wanted to let you know.”
Peter had no idea Uncle Rhodey had been doing that. Well, he knew that before the kiss with Harry had happened Harry and Rhodey had started to get somewhat along, but he had thought that had since been ruined. It made sense for Uncle Rhodey to try to be nicer to Harry, as Peter had told him he needed to make it up to Harry if he wanted to be forgiven by his nephew, but it was strange that he would only do it when Peter was not present. What would the point be for Uncle Rhodey to be nice to Harry if Peter did not see it so he could stop being mad at him? Maybe it was to seem more sincere? Or, maybe, because Uncle Rhodey was actually sincere? Well, Harry probably thought so as here he was, trying to vouch for him.
“I told him I was angry at him for not giving me the chance to tell my parents about us… getting together and for possibly outing you, that it would have been so messed up if you hadn’t been ready.” Peter explained, looking away as he let Harry lead the dance. “I also told him to make it up to you.”
Harry stayed silent for a few seconds and Peter wondered if Harry did not approve of what Peter had told his uncle. What he had said seemed pretty justified, at least to him.
“Feeling angry about this is completely normal and understandable. You should have gotten the chance to tell your parents yourself when you were ready to do so and in a way you were comfortable with.”
For some reason, this response stunned him a bit. It made it seem like Uncle Rhodey might have outed him, not Harry, but he had not. Well… Had he not? True, his parents had always been so open about him being allowed to have a boyfriend instead of a girlfriend, but they had never talked about it properly. Peter had never told them he did like guys, but that was because that had never been something that had mattered much to him, or that he had properly realised even. He had never thought about liking girls or boys before Harry.
“Yeah…” Peter said, not knowing what else to reply to that.
“Has he apologised?” Harry asked as he slightly rubbed his thumb against Peter’s waist.
“He has.” Peter nodded. “He said he hadn’t realised it was our first kiss.”
Now that Peter was thinking back to their conversation with a clearer mind, Uncle Rhodey seemed to be really sorry once Peter had told him this key piece of information. He had looked even more sorry when Peter had pointed out how much he could have hurt Harry. Maybe he was really sorry for what he had done and that was why he was working on fixing the situation without making it obvious to Peter? Peter too had hurt people in the past without meaning to. He had hurt Harry multiple times because he had read things wrong, kind of like what Uncle Rhodey had done. Harry had understood his intentions were not bad and had forgiven him, so would it not be unfair to not give Uncle Rhodey the same courtesy? Peter could be mad about what had happened but recognised the fact that his uncle was trying his best and was seemingly learning from his mistakes.
“I…” Peter tried to organise his thoughts into a sentence, but it was not easy. “I think I just needed to be mad at him for a bit, because of what he did, but he’s trying and that’s… that matters.”
Uncle Rhodey had defended Harry when Peter had been too far away to do it, that had to matter. Peter looked back to Harry who was smiling and had soft eyes that did not make him feel like he was being judged but encouraged. That was a nice feeling.
“I think.” Peter added.
His feelings had started to get untangled, but there were still knots left to undone before his relationship with his uncle could go back to normal, and Peter needed to figure out how to do this. Or Uncle Rhodey did.
“That’s okay.” Harry softly said. “It’s up to you to figure out what matters to you, I just wanted to possibly remind you that you do seem to matter very much to your uncle.”
Peter knew that, he knew how much his uncle loved him, but it still felt nice to be reminded of it in this way.
“Thanks.”
Harry’s smile widened as he looked at Peter’s face in a way that gave him that tight feeling only he could give him. Peter would ask someone what that meant, but it was probably just something that came with having a boyfriend and thus would be a very awkward thing to ask. As Peter decided to put that question away, classifying it as another mystery of human nature, Harry looked away and then back to Peter.
“I think your parents are looking at us.” Harry slightly leaned in to whisper in Peter’s ear, making him have to fight the urge to try to snuggle his face in Harry’s neck. “Your father might or might have not taken a picture of us as well.”
Of course, Peter’s father would try to get a picture of them dancing, he was probably going to use it to tease Peter about being a… what would be the correct term here? Peter could not be called a ladies’ man as Harry was not a lady, so, what? A gentlemen’s man? Well, in this case, it would be more a gentleman’s man, but even calling Peter this would be an exaggeration. Anyway, it did not matter. It did not matter what his father would call him to tease him, it did not matter that he was taking pictures of them, it did not matter that his parents were watching them and it mattered even less that other people were probably watching him too. Peter was really enjoying dancing with Harry, and he was going to keep on doing that.
“That’s fine. Let’s keep dancing, please.” Peter said, before deciding to go all in to convince Harry to keep dancing with him despite the stares. “Darling.”
Peter had looked away from Harry’s face, not being brave enough to look at him when he was trying to get him to comply by deliberately using a nickname Harry seemed to really like, but he felt him slightly tensed up before relaxing again.
“It would be my pleasure, Prince Pete.” Harry replied in the voice that would always make Peter want to be wrapped by it so badly.
So they danced, for much longer than Peter would have thought he would ever dance, until their legs – or rather Harry’s legs – got too tired and it was going to be time to leave soon anyway.
Chapter 29: Days like this
Notes:
Content Warnings/Archive Warnings
Hi, so as you can see I added an archive warning. I realised that just having it as a “Character death” tag was not enough, so I added the archive warning. I’m still keeping the “chose not to warn” because I haven’t written the most violent part of the story, so I want to keep that to basically cover my butt if that part ends up more graphic than I had planned it to be. To be clear, though, there will be no underage or rape/non-con in this fic. It’s really due to the “graphic violence” warning, but it’s more likely than not that I won’t need it.
Also, sorry if I sound off, it just has been a long week for me.Very general/vague mentions of forced coming out and homophobia
Skip to “Playing video games with Uncle Rhodey again had been very nice”
Chapter Text
“Can I come sit with you?”
Uncle Rhodey was standing in the doorway of the gaming room, looking at Peter. Peter had not had the chance to talk to him since the gala which had been a few days ago. That was not too unusual, Uncle Rhodey had probably been stuck at work ever since. Looking back at his uncle, Peter hesitated whether to tell Uncle Rhodey off or let him in. Peter was still a bit mad at him, especially now that he knew exactly why he was angry at him, but he now knew that Uncle Rhodey had been trying to make it up to Harry. Peter also knew his uncle had not meant to hurt him and that Peter had also accidentally hurt people in the past, so it would probably be a dick move to ignore him or send him away.
“Sure.” Peter shrugged, trying to look like he did not care as he still played his game.
He knew what Uncle Rhodey had come here to do, to try to apologise and explain his side again. Peter just hoped that this time, he would be better at keeping his cool. Uncle Rhodey sat down and watched him play. Peter tried to not find it weird, but could not help it. It felt so familiar but so wrong at the same time. He hated it, he wished it would just feel as comforting as it used to.
“I’m starting to get why you like him.” Uncle Rhodey suddenly said.
This startled and confused Peter so badly that he nearly dropped his controller. He had expected his uncle to say anything but this.
“I’m sorry I did not trust your judgment.” Uncle Rhodey kept going. “I should have given him a chance.”
Peter put down his controller, not bothering to pause his game, and just looked at his uncle. Uncle Rhodey had tried to apologise to him about snitching on him and Harry, but not about this. Somehow, it felt more meaningful to Peter. Peter looked down, replaying in his head the conversations he had had with Harry, not only the one they had during the gala about Rhodey but also when Harry had managed to get him to open up about his worries while they were getting ready. Peter needed to learn to open up every once in a while. Just because he had secrets to keep from everyone, it did not mean he had to keep everything secret, including his feelings.
“I’m mad that I did not get the chance to tell you guys properly.” Peter finally said, having to fight to get each word out. “Just because you did not care that I’m into guys and stuff, just because you’ve always been supportive, doesn’t mean that it doesn't matter. It does, you’ve seen it, at the gala.”
Uncle Rhodey stayed silent for a bit, but Peter kept on staring down at something on the floor. He knew that if he looked at his uncle right now, he would want to hide in his bubble of silence, even if he did not know why.
“You’re right, I did see it at the gala. I’m sorry. I should have talked to you, I should have let you explain yourself, even if you were hiding a relationship from us.” Uncle Rhodey sighed.
This felt good to hear, it was validating. Peter knew that this whole situation had come from his uncle not trusting his judgment, so hearing him agree with it was what Peter had so deeply craved.
“Thank you.” Peter whispered.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This would not magically fix everything, but it sure felt like running cold water on a burn wound: it was soothing pain that Peter had had to keep pushing down. He opened his eyes again and looked at the floor.
“I’m sorry I took… this away from you, Peter. All I have ever wanted was to protect you, to make sure you’re safe. And I’ve failed at that.”
Peter bit his lips, remembering how Uncle Rhodey had always been here for him when he had been scared, how he had always made him feel protected.
“I know you didn’t mean to…”
That was true. Yes, Uncle Rhodey had messed up, but Peter understood now how his uncle had misread the situation and how much he was now regretting it.
“It still doesn’t make it right, Peter.” Uncle Rhodey replied.
Peter took a deep breath, trying to gather his thoughts. They had become so clear when he had talked about them to Harry, why were they so messy again?
“I’ve messed up before. You were still there for me.” Peter pointed out.
“I’ll always be here for you, Peter.”
Uncle Rhodey had replied this so quickly and with so much confidence that Peter would not dare doubt it for even a second. It felt so comforting, like hugging your favourite teddy bear. For a few seconds, Peter considered telling Uncle Rhodey about the lab. He would understand why Peter had to deal with it on its own, he would help him instead of stopping him.
“You remember the first time you came to my work?” Uncle Rhodey said, interrupting Peter’s thoughts.
Peter looked at his uncle. He had only come to his work a handful of times, Uncle Rhodey was always very busy and was more often than not dealing with confidential things. Not the best job when it came to being able to bring your nephew with you. However, Peter was not sure he remembered the first time he had gone there, so he shook his head.
“You were still young.” Uncle Rhodey said, resting his back against the couch. “Other people at my work had organised some ‘bring your kid to work’ day, they had sold it to the higher-ups as it being ‘the chance to get the youth interested in joining us when they grow up’ or something.” Uncle Rhodey made air quotes with his fingers. “I found it quite weird, but your parents figured it’d be a chance for us to bond. We’d usually just sit together with you watching cartoons or playing with whatever your dad was dumb enough to let you take for his lab while your mom was not watching.”
Peter remembered them sitting together in silence back when he would not talk, not long after getting adopted. He had actually quite liked how Uncle Rhodey would always let him be silent without seemingly hoping he would just start talking out of nowhere. True, it had been sometimes boring, but it had felt safe, very safe.
“I actually stole some of those, I think.” Peter chimed in.
It had been basically fifteen years since he had stolen those right under his uncle’s nose. Surely, it was too late for Peter to get in trouble now. Uncle Rhodey looked at him, seemingly surprised, before getting a resigned expression.
“I knew I should have taken some of them away from you, I just figured Tony must know what he was doing.” Uncle Rhodey sighed, making his nephew smile. “It’s too late now and thankfully you never got hurt, so let’s agree to never mention it to your parents, alright?”
“Sure.” Peter nodded.
“The point was that it was your first time at the place I work at, which must have been scary enough for you to slip out when I was not looking at you for like five seconds. As, you know, I was busy trying to do my job. When I noticed you were missing, we started locking down the whole building. The higher-ups were furious, losing a kid or having a kid mess up things while unsupervised would have been horrible press and you could have hurt yourself. Anyway, I’m looking everywhere for you and then I open this broom closet and see you hurdled up in one corner in the dark. You looked so scared…”
Uncle Rhodey stared at something a bit to the right of Peter and then took a deep breath and looked back at him. Was Uncle Rhodey getting emotional? Peter had seen his uncle show emotions, but not usually this one. It was clearly a memory that had impacted him, that had stuck with him. Peter had had no idea, how could he when he could not even remember it happening?
“…but as soon as you saw me, you just reached out to me and called for me. It was as if you had been waiting for me to come find you. I don’t know, after that… I just knew I could never let anything happen to you.”
This somewhat felt familiar. Peter did not remember hiding in a closet or calling for his uncle, he did not even remember running away, but he did vaguely remember the feeling of going from terrified to safe by seeing his uncle. This feeling could totally be from a different situation, Uncle Rhodey had made him feel safe plenty of times, but maybe it came from this. It made Peter want to know more about what had happened, especially seeing how precious the memory was to Uncle Rhodey.
“Was it the first time I had called for you?” Peter asked.
“It was.” Uncle Rhodey nodded. “The first time you talked to me as well.”
Peter could now see why this memory was so precious to his uncle. He had always thought Uncle Rhodey had become protective of him after the ‘friends incident’, but maybe he had gotten that wrong. Maybe his uncle had always been so protective of him, Peter had just not noticed it before or his uncle had stopped hiding it as much.
“Thank you for sharing this with me.” Peter said.
His uncle smiled and then wrapped an arm around Peter’s shoulder, pulling him closer. Peter let him.
“Thanks for being my nephew.”
They stayed like this for a bit, with Peter resting his head against his uncle’s shoulder. They would rarely hug, but when they did, Peter always felt so safe. He was really lucky to have his uncle. True, he could make mistakes, as anyone could, but Peter knew he would do anything to keep him safe and he was trying his best to be a good uncle. Peter decided that yes, that was all that mattered to him.
“Just for the record, I will still make Harry regret ever being born if he ever hurts you. Nothing will ever change that.” Uncle Rhodey said, breaking the silence.
Maybe it was the suddenness of it, the confidence in his uncle's voice, or the image of Harry running from Iron Patriot, but Peter let out a laugh.
“He knows. Don’t worry, Uncle Rhodey.”
“Good.”
Peter hesitated. Ever since the gala, he had been wondering what that guy had said to Harry that had been bad enough for Uncle Rhodey to step in. Peter had not asked Harry about it, he did not want to possibly bring up a painful memory, but this was his opportunity to ask Uncle Rhodey.
“What happened at the gala?”
Uncle Rhodey seemed surprised by the question. He let go of Peter and straightened up, now frowning. This topic was definitely not his favourite.
“Some douchebag that your Dad and I know approached us. He had seen you guys walk in together and decided it was his chance to say some mean things to Harry. It was things I don’t stand for, so I had to defend the kid.”
Peter’s brain nearly had to reboot trying to process what his uncle had just said. At first, Uncle Rhodey had called Harry “Harry”, not “your boyfriend” or “Osborn” or anything of the sort. That was a good sign, it did seem they were getting along better. But then, as crazy as it seemed, he had said he “had to defend the kid”. Calling Harry “the kid”, especially in this context, was an even better sign. It was a bit of a crazy idea, but, maybe Uncle Rhodey was not only getting along better with Harry, maybe he was actually starting to see him in a good light. It would explain why he had said he could see why Peter liked Harry. Did Uncle Rhodey actually like Harry as a boyfriend for Peter?! No, that was probably too much of a reach. However, Peter still really hoped so.
He let himself enjoy the moment, taking the time he needed to fully process what he had just learnt from what his uncle had said, before letting his curiosity take over once again.
“What did he say?” He asked.
“I’m sorry, Peter, but it’s not my place to tell you.”
That was surprising, Peter had not expected such a response. However, now that Uncle Rhodey had said it, Peter realised that it was probably a good one? His uncle was thinking of and prioritizing Harry’s feelings and well-being by refusing to tell his own nephew about what had been said. This also made him realise that what he had just done, asking this behind Harry’s back just because he was curious, was probably not very nice. He had not meant to be all gossipy, he had just been curious, but it was not really his place to ask this. Clearly, the guy had not said anything that might have made Uncle Rhodey mad at or distrust Harry even more, as Uncle Rhodey had stepped in to protect him, so it was nothing Peter should be worried about. Thus, what he should focus on, out of this whole situation, was that, maybe, Uncle Rhodey did appreciate Harry now, maybe he even cared for him a bit, deep down. That would be nice. Peter nodded.
“You’re right.”
Uncle Rhodey smiled, patted him on the shoulder, then said:
“Alright, give me a controller, I need to show you how it’s properly done.”
Peter raised an eyebrow. He was definitely better than Uncle Rhodey at this game.
“Sure, whatever you say, Uncle Rhodey.” He said as he passed him the controller.
This was going to be fun.
Playing video games with Uncle Rhodey again had been very nice, Peter had really missed that. He was also glad he had been able to talk with him. It had, of course, not erased all the hurt Peter had previously felt, but things were now okay between them and they had both learnt from what had happened. Of course, they would both make mistakes at some point again, but hopefully, they will know how to properly communicate this time. Peter would have played with Uncle Rhodey until he physically could not anymore like they had done when Uncle Bruce had left, but Uncle Rhodey had to go to work. So, instead, Peter looked for either his boyfriend or his father. His mother was also at work and would not be back until later, meaning Peter could not silently hang out with her as she worked. Thus, either his father or boyfriend would have to do. To be honest, Peter would be more than happy to spend time with either of them.
The universe must have been in some kind of debt to him, as Peter ended up stumbling upon both his father and his boyfriend at the same time. They were in the living room, playing Monopoly. Well, that was a strange sight.
“Of course I’m buying it, I’m not an idiot.” Peter’s father said as he handed Harry some monopoly money. “No way in hell I’m letting you buy all the propriety on this street.”
Harry took the money, counted it and then put it in the bank.
“A guy can dream.” He replied before noticing Peter. “Hi, Pete!”
Peter’s father turned around to look at his son.
“Have you come to see me crush your boyfriend at Monopoly?”
“Those are some brave words coming from someone with half the number of proprieties I have.” Harry snapped back as he rolled a die.
Oh yes, Peter definitely wanted to see them play Monopoly. It was sure to be entertaining.
“You’re just blowing all of your cash on mediocre proprieties that have a terrible return on investment.” Peter’s father snapped back. “I’m getting the good ones and, soon enough, you’ll be too broke to even pay me the rent.”
“Whatever you say, old man.” Harry said with a smirk.
Peter looked at his boyfriend, surprised. Harry had become comfortable with all the friendly banter that would always be happening in the Stark villa, but he had never joined in before. When Peter turned his head to watch his father’s face, wanting to see how he was going to react to this, he immediately laughed. He looked even more confused than Peter, blinking at Harry, before putting on an exaggerated offended face and turning to his son.
“Did you hear what your boyfriend just called me, kid?!”
Peter had definitely not expected to see Harry comfortable enough to bicker with his father, but he was really glad that he was.
“I mean, he’s not wrong.” Peter pointed out as he sat down next to Harry, giving him a smile. “You’re old and a man.”
Harry gave him a smile back, one that seemed so pure that Peter had to once against fight not to either kiss or try to smother him with a hug. He was looking so happy. Peter was glad Harry was having a good time playing a board game with Peter’s father as he definitely could not do that with his own father.
“Great, now even my own kid is against me!” Peter’s father sighed as he dramatically threw his arms around. “I knew I should have not let you bring a guy over for the holiday.”
Peter shook his head as he fought a smile.
“It’s too late now, Dad. Anyway, let me be the bank.”
Peter did not like actually playing Monopoly, as playing that game with his parents was way too stressful and he had no sense of business, but he loved being the bank when they would play. Yeah, it was weird, but it had always been his thing.
“How did it go with your uncle?” Harry whispered in his ear as he went to grab his pawn.
Of course, Harry knew about Uncle Rhodey coming to talk to him. Peter did wonder who had brought it up, if it had been Harry or Uncle Rhodey. He could not really be mad about it, though, not when he had been the one who wanted them to talk and get along in the first place.
“It went well, I think.” Peter whispered back, watching Harry move his pawn. “We’re okay again. It was nice talking to him.”
It had especially been nice to hear about that memory Uncle Rhodey had, but it did not feel like it was Peter’s place to share it with Harry.
“I’m glad.”
“Stop trying to seduce the bank and draw the card!” Peter’s father interrupted.
Peter blushed at that. That was just too awkward of a thing to hear your father say. Peter then saw Harry open his mouth as he reached for a chance card and just knew he was going to say something even more embarrassing. Absolutely not. Peter kicked him, hopefully, not too hard in the leg to try to shut him up before it was too late. It worked, as Harry closed his mouth, but he then gave him a look with an eyebrow raised. Peter decided to pretend as if nothing had happened and did his best to look innocent. Harry drew the card, and read it before setting it down and handing bills to Peter.
“Why do I keep being so unlucky?” He asked.
Quickly reading the card as he did so, Peter took the money. He then happily counted it, separating the bills, and then put them in the bank, making sure all the bills were neatly placed. He did really love managing the bank, it felt so satisfying. Too bad he had missed his father and Harry buying a bunch of properties early, it would have probably gotten the chance to give some change back. God, he loved giving change back. Now that he was thinking about it, Peter was pretty sure that his parents had not simply ‘loved only having a few big bills’ but it had been them being nice to him. Oh well, if that was the case, he really hoped Harry would catch on soon and do the same.
“That, my dear kid-in-law, is your karma for calling me old!”
This took Peter right out of his fantasy about giving change back and having to do a bunch of math on top of his head. One thing Peter’s father and Harry had in common was their tendency to keep on using annoying nicknames, but Peter already knew that.
“You’re still calling him that?” Peter asked, trying to hide his embarrassment.
“I actually quite like it.”
Peter looked at Harry, surprised. Harry seemed completely serious. Oh, he did actually like the nickname. Peter tended to forget they often did not find the same things to be embarrassing. It made sense, though, that Harry would like this nickname. Peter’s father was basically calling Harry a part of the family by using this nickname, and Harry seemed to really want to be. Peter did too, he too really wanted Harry to be part of his family. Not in a weird way, like a brother way, of course, that would be gross. No, in an 'accepted by Peter’s entire family and treated like one of them, kind of way.
“Oh.”
Not sure what else to say, Peter smiled to Harry who, of course, smiled back. Peter did, however, make a point to not look at his father who he knew would have his victorious face on. Picturing his father’s smug smile helped Peter figure out what to reply.
“Then please, destroy your father-in-law at Monopoly.” He said and then whispered one last word. “Darling.”
He knew Harry liked that nickname, and he wanted to get used to using it, but actually saying it loud enough for his father felt too much for him right now. Nevertheless, it had its intended effect as Harry’s face lit up with a huge smile.
“I sure will, Pete.”
Peter smiled and decided to do his best to enjoy the moment. Days like this were to be cherished.
Chapter 30: Hold me close, don't let go, watch me burn
Notes:
Hi, here is chapter 30! It is a big one, so hopefully you like big chapters (the next one is big too, but then we go back to more normal-length chapters).
Before we "get started" with this chapter, I just wanted to thank you all for all the kudos I have been receiving. I'm not sure why I've been getting so many of them since the last chapter, but I am very grateful for every single one of them!
Chapter 31 will be posted in two weeks on the 17th of November.
Content Warnings
Abandonment by a father
Harry gets cut off by his father. The conversation is not fully shown (we only see Harry's replies) and it is not announced by his father directly. However, we see the immediate aftermath of Harry learning this.
To skip this stop reading at "They were nearly done with their dish, with basically everything cooking needing minimal supervision, when Harry’s phone rang."
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
On the list of things Peter had not expected to happen any time soon, waking up naked with Harry in his arms was definitely somewhere at the top. Harry was, of course, also naked as it would not be awkward enough otherwise. He had his arms around Peter with his head snuggled on his bare chest. Snuggling like this did feel nice, but how on earth had they ended up like this? Memories came back to Peter and he felt like his head might explode. Had they really…? Well, it seemed they had. Wow. Harry started to move, probably waking up, and Peter had to fight the urge to run to the bathroom and lock himself in it. It was fine, this was fine, after what they had done together, Peter should totally be able to handle waking up naked with his boyfriend, right?
“Good morning, Prince Pete.”
Harry was looking up at Peter, with his head still against Peter’s chest and wearing the most beautiful smile Peter had ever seen. He looked both so happy and peaceful at the same time. He also had his fully messy hair which Peter loved so very much and was now able to see every single morning. Peter wished he could capture this moment in his brain like one did with a camera.
“Good morning, Darling.”
Harry’s smile widened, making Peter’s heart skip a beat. Unfortunately, Harry then hid his face against Peter’s chest, making Peter’s bare skin shiver but also hiding that beautiful smile of his. Now that the embarrassment had started to fade, Peter was seeing how nice this actually was. It was really nice, even. He could better feel Harry’s warmth and had so much of his skin against his, which felt quite soothing. Would it be weird if Peter were to wish for this to happen again? Not necessarily what they had done the previous night, but waking up like this, Peter would like that very much. After all, Harry was in his arms, naked and completely safe. Peter did not need anything more than that: nobody could ever hurt Harry there, and that was all he wanted. How could Peter ever let Harry go? Peter tightened his hold around him, deciding to forever hold him like this so he would always be safe, as he delicately kissed the top of his head.
“I love you.” Harry suddenly said.
It had been a bit muffled, as Harry’s face was still against Peter’s chest, but Peter knew he had not heard Harry wrong. Peter opened his mouth to speak but then stopped. Why was Harry saying this now? Was he saying this for the right reasons? Peter did not want him to say it for the wrong reasons.
“You’re not saying this because of… last night, right?” Peter asked.
He did not want Harry to say that he loved him just because they had finally done the deed and that was what he was now supposed to say. It would not count, it would not be real. Harry shook his head, his hair tingling Peter’s skin.
“I’m not.” Harry replied. “I really do love you.”
Peter let out a sigh of relief.
“I love you too.” He let out so easily, not having to think a single second about it.
Harry looked up so quickly that if it had not been for Peter’s amazing reflexes, he would have probably headbutted him.
“Really?” Harry asked in a small voice.
He looked so unsure, as if he was scared to believe Peter. Peter wondered why. Yes, Peter had never told him that he loved him before, he had not even thought it, not explicitly at least, but there was no doubt in his mind that he loved him. Peter did not love him in the same way that he loved his other family members, but he loved him nonetheless. He was ready to do anything to protect him, no matter the cost, so, of course he loved him. Peter wished he could tell him so, tell him that it would be ridiculous to think he did not love him when he loved him so fucking much, but that was now what Harry needed. Harry needed reassurance, he needed to know that yes, Peter did really love him, not being reprimanded for not somehow reading Peter’s mind. There was a point in time when Peter had completely missed the fact that Harry liked him romantically, so how could he blame Harry for not realising that Peter loved him? Harry’s father was probably also to blame here, but Peter really did not want to think about him right now.
“Yes, I do.” Peter said looking seriously at Harry. “I love you, so much. I really do love you.”
Peter was ready to say it as many times as it would take to make Harry believe it. Harry looked at him, for longer than he would usually look at Peter, before snuggling his head against Peter’s chest again.
“I love you so much too.” Harry sighed.
Not being able to help himself, now that he was allowed to do it, Peter kissed Harry’s hair again. He did it multiple times, as if it would help get the fact that he loved Harry through his head. Maybe it would. After a while of this, Harry spoke again:
“Today’s going to be the best day ever, Pete.”
“Because we’re finally going to have our second date?” Peter asked, smiling.
They had had a bunch of “almost dates”, as they called them, since their first date. It was basically dates, as they would go to the movies, go on walks along the beach despite the chilly weather, or even go to nerdy book shops, but they would not call them “dates”. No, that name was reserved for when they would have their second official date. Peter had agreed to let Harry choose what they would do for their second date. He had originally been supposed to organise it, but Harry had decided to handle it himself. He had not told Peter what it was going to be, which Peter did not love as uncertainties tended to stress him out very much, but he had sucked it up as it seemed to make Harry happy. It had taken Harry a while to choose what they were going to do for that date and to then plan it, hence the “almost dates” they had had while they waited to have their second date. Today, however, was the day of their second date. Peter had still no idea what Harry had planned, though.
“Exactly.” Harry said before kissing Peter. “I’m so excited.”
Harry did seem really excited, he was smiling like a little kid and he seemed like he was ready to jump out of bed quicker than Peter ever could. Whatever Harry had planned, Peter was going to make sure Harry would have the best time ever. Harry really deserved it. If Peter had to talk to one thousand people, he would. If he had to eat all of the food he hated the most in the world, he would finish it all without complaining. If he had to fight the scariest spiders, he… let’s not think about messed up spiders, Peter would rather not think about those.
“I’m excited too.” Peter forced himself to say, trying to fight any memories related to spiders that might have been creeping into his head.
“Don’t worry, I think you’re going to enjoy what I have planned too.” Harry said, kissing Peter’s cheek.
Peter must have done a bad job of hiding his worries then. At least, Harry had not taken it the wrong way and the kiss on the cheek had felt really nice. It was now the second time Harry had kissed him on the cheek, Peter was going to have to add it to his “things that boyfriends do” list. He tried not to blush thinking about the other things he could now add to that list. Nope, he was not going to think about those now.
“Okay.” He replied, clearing his throat.
Hopefully, Harry was not getting too good at figuring out what Peter was thinking.
“At what time is it?” Peter asked.
Harry got a strange smile, it was a mixture of being proud and… naughty? No, that was definitely not the correct word for that. Mischievous, his smile looked mischievous, that was a better word to describe it.
“It starts with breakfast.” He replied, all proud of himself.
Well, that was weird. What kind of date started with breakfast? What had he planned for breakfast? Oh god, Peter really hoped he had not planned for them to eat weird eggs for breakfast, like from an ostrich. Did ostrich lay eggs? Peter was pretty sure they did. Anyway, that's not the point. Of course, Peter would eat an ostrich egg if it somehow was part of Harry’s perfect date, but he would rather not.
“Let’s get ready for breakfast, then.”
Peter let go of Harry and stepped out of bed, listing in his head all the animals he knew about that laid eggs. Only when the cold air outside of the blanket hit fully hit him did he remember that he was butt naked. Right, Peter was completely naked and Harry had probably a front-row view, but that was okay. Harry had, as of last night, already seen him naked before, so it was fine, no need to feel embarrassed. Peter still felt really really embarrassed, though. Trying to hide it, and probably failing at it, Peter quickly grabbed whatever clothes he could find and rushed to the bathroom to get ready. Well, at least Harry would have been able to enjoy the view – god, that felt crazy to admit, but Peter knew it was true – if he had wished to and he did, after all, deserve the best date ever today.
Once they were fully dressed and ready to go eat breakfast, Peter and Harry made their way downstairs. Peter was still feeling a bit nervous about whatever Harry had planned but was doing his best to hide it. Harry had said he was going to enjoy the date and Peter should trust him. Still, when they got to the kitchen, Peter could not help but feel relieved to see there was nothing obviously weird. Harry made his way to the fridge and opened it, starting to look for things in it. Peter tensed up again. Anything but weird eggs, anything but weird eggs.
“The plan is to start the day right by making a nutritious breakfast together. Then, we’ll cook a nice lunch.” Harry said as he pulled out ingredients such as milk and eggs. “I’ve tried my best to pick a fun recipe that’s not too complicated but that we would both like.”
“So, we’re going to spend the day cooking?” Peter asked.
Harry put down the supposed ingredients on the kitchen counter and looked at Peter.
“Only until lunch, as we’re making lunch.” Harry quickly said. “Don’t worry, the recipe is really straightforward, and tonight we can have pizza, or cheeseburgers, and we can relax.”
He was not smiling anymore and looked anxious, his eyes searching Peter’s. Had he thought that Peter did not like what he had planned? That was not how Peter had intended his question to sound, at all, quite the contrary. Peter was more than happy to cook with Harry all day if that was what he had planned. They had the villa to themselves as Peter’s parent had “conveniently” decided to visit some friends. So, spending the day inside, with Harry, doing something Harry loved sounded like the best possible way to spend it to Peter.
“We could make the pizza or cheeseburger for dinner ourselves. If you want to.” Peter offered, hoping it would ease Harry’s worries.
To Peter’s delight, a smile came back on Harry’s face. It was even bigger than it had previously been.
“If you’re okay with that, then yes, I’m sure it would be fun!” Harry replied, obviously trying to contain his excitement as he looked like he was about to jump up and down.
God, Peter loved that man so much.
“I’ll ask Happy to drive us to go buy what we need after lunch then.”
Peter joined Harry at the kitchen counter where he had put everything they would supposedly use to make breakfast. It was going to be a nutritious breakfast for sure, but at least Peter would not get peckish while they prepared lunch and be tempted to eat some of the ingredients when Harry had his back turned. Maybe Harry had planned for that.
“You really don’t mind cooking this much? I know it’s not your thing.” Harry asked.
Harry looked tensed again. Clearly, Peter had not done a good enough job of reassuring him that it was okay. Peter could relate, though, he too had been worried that Harry might not enjoy their date at Disneyland as it did not really seem like his kind of thing at first – or at least until he had learnt they could meet princesses. To be fair, Harry was not being ridiculous by worrying that Peter would not enjoy cooking all day, what he had said was true, cooking was definitely not Peter’s thing. Indeed, he could feed himself in a somewhat healthy way using pasta, microwavable vegetables and whatever meat or fish he could throw in the oven without losing his mind about having to touch something raw, that kind of texture making him want to cut or shake his fingers off of his hands, but that was about it. However, Harry was forgetting one crucial fact.
“Harry?”
“Yes?”
He was looking even more worried now, but Peter knew exactly how to make it all go away. He forced himself to look into Harry’s eyes, those beautiful eyes that used to make him nervous but now brought him so much comfort, and simply said:
“I love you.”
Harry’s mouth slightly opened, but then closed as he looked away, suddenly becoming quite red. If Peter had known how much it apparently meant to Harry to be told that, he would have started saying it ages ago. Harry took a deep breath and then straightened up as he ran a hand in his hair.
“I love you too, Pete.” He said, looking back at Peter. “Now, let’s get to work before you whine that you’re hungry and try to steal some of the ingredients.”
Well, that confirmed Peter’s suspicion that Harry had planned around the risk of Peter getting hungry and eating ingredients. Peter chuckled at that fact. Harry was starting to know him too well.
“Sir, yes, sir.” Peter said, straightening himself too.
After all, Harry was going to be the boss today, so Peter might as well make sure he felt like one.
“Shut up.” Harry mumbled while smiling and shaking his head.
All nervousness or anxiety had seemed to vanish from his face. It was interesting: usually, Peter was the one who was nervous and Harry would have to make him feel at ease. However, today, as they were about to do something that Harry was so used to doing and loved doing, it had been the opposite.
“Hey, that’s my line.” Peter pointed out.
“Sue me, Pete. Sue me.” Harry said as he raised his eyebrows in defiance and went to wash his hands.
“You know what, I might.” Peter replied as he joined his boyfriend at the kitchen sink.
Cooking breakfast had been pretty straightforward. Peter had done it before with his parents and Harry had chosen classic foods, so he had not been too lost. Cooking lunch, however, was a different story. The sheer amount of things to do, all the steps to perfectly follow while keeping an eye on other things had nearly completely overwhelmed Peter right away. Luckily, Harry was there. No matter what was going on, Harry would always stay calm and collected as he would talk gently to Peter. He even dealt with the more complicated things, graciously giving Peter only one thing at a time to do. Peter liked that, he liked having one task and being able to completely focus on it, knowing Harry was handling the rest. It felt more similar to when he would work on robots and it was kind of comforting. Harry was also a great teacher, he would explain things well and would never get frustrated with Peter for asking seemingly dumb questions. Instead, he seemed to try to understand the reason for the question to figure out how to answer it properly. As they cooked, Peter started to understand the purpose of this date: they were learning to work together. They had technically worked together when doing their robotics project but more like one after the other, not really at the same time. It was also really different from studying together. It really felt like they were a team right now, cooking together. Harry was like the chef, and Peter his sous-chef. Peter was more than happy to be his sous chef here in the kitchen, especially when it meant they would have amazing food for lunch. They were nearly done with their dish, with basically everything cooking needing minimal supervision, when Harry’s phone rang.
“Oh, it’s Bernard.” Harry said as he grabbed his phone with his one clean hand. “I should probably answer, he’s my Jarvis but… human. He doesn’t normally call me, do you mind?”
“No, of course.” Peter shook his head
That had been a funny way to explain who ‘Bernard’ was, but it did the job pretty well. As Harry answered the phone, Peter wondered if he had been one of the people who had raised Harry after his mother died. He then wondered if he would meet him one day. Did Peter want to meet him? Would Bernard want to meet him? Better yet, would Harry want them to meet? Peter had no answer to any of those questions. It would probably depend on how much Bernard had been there for Harry and what he would think of Harry dating Peter. Did Bernard know that Harry had a boyfriend? Did he know he liked guys? Did he know about his social life in high school? Once again, so many answers, but not a single answer.
“What?!”
Harry’s voice had suddenly become louder, making Peter slightly jump and come back right down to earth. Peter started to actually listen to what Harry was saying, observing him as well. Harry was tensed. Peter could see he was gripping the phone hard and was frowning. Something was wrong. Peter did not know what was wrong, but something was wrong, making his heart already drop to his stomach.
“No, no, you must be confused, he wouldn’t…”
Peter also tensed up. Who was “he” and what would he not do?
“Why?!” Harry said, again louder than usual. “Why would he do that?! I’m his son! I’m his only son!”
This was about Harry’s father. What had that bastard done now?
“But I don’t understand, that was weeks ago! Why now?! And he cannot possibly be that mad about it, he wouldn’t do that to his own son…”
What had been “weeks ago”? Peter needed to figure out what had happened “weeks ago” right now. He took a deep breath, trying to focus his mind on this task instead of completely panicking. “Weeks ago” meant at least two weeks ago, what had happened two weeks ago? Nothing much, Peter had made up with his uncle, but this was not relevant here. What about three weeks ago? Well, there had been the gala and… Oh no. Three weeks ago had been when the gala had happened, when people had seen them holding each other’s arms and dancing. Peter’s blood ran cold as a sense of doom came over him. Please, not this. Anything but this.
“But I’m his son…”
Harry’s voice broke and soon enough, tears flooded in. One after the other, they all left his eyes until his cheeks became just a wet mess.
“I’m his son…” Harry said again before letting out the most gut-wrenching sob Peter had ever heard.
Without having to even think about it, Peter wrapped his arms around Harry. As soon as he did, Harry’s legs seemed to give out as Peter was now supporting Harry’s weight. The phone Harry had been holding dropped to the floor.
“Harry? Are you okay?” Peter asked.
This was a stupid question, of course Harry was not okay! Harry only let out more horrible sobs, but it clearly answered the question. Peter took a deep breath, trying to fight his own emotions and that excruciating pain he was feeling in his heart. It was as if someone had just impaled him with a spear. Peter needed to keep a clear head. He could not take care of Harry if he became himself a mess. He looked around him. Things were cooking, both in the oven and on the stove. He could not leave them cooking like this, they might catch on fire, but he had his hands full. Everything in this villa was connected to Jarvis, the stove and oven must be too, right? Peter felt like he should know this for sure, but, right now, his mind was too clouded to try to remember. Still, he decided to give it a try.
“Jarvis? Can you turn off the oven and the stove, please, and whatever else is cooking?”
“Of course, Peter. Should I also call your parents?” Jarvis replied.
Should he? Fuck, Peter had no idea. On one hand, they could help with whatever was going on, but on the other, would Harry want to be seen like this?
“I don’t know yet. I’ll tell you if I want you to, okay?”
“Of course, Peter.”
Now that he had made sure that nothing would catch on fire, Peter needed to figure out how to help Harry. He was clearly too much of a mess to talk or even stand properly right now. He should probably lie down, preferably in a bed. Harry was obviously not going to walk to the bed, so, should Peter carry him? Would it not be suspicious for Peter to be able to carry Harry? Fuck it, it was only Harry, who would probably be too much of a mess to think about it, and Jarvis, who would hopefully keep his mouth shut, around. Doing what he had to do, Peter shifted Harry around in his arms to slide an arm under his legs and then widened his stance. Now was the time to hope Harry would not freak out and try to get out of Peter’s arms. That would definitely not be good.
“Here we go.” Peter said to himself before taking a deep breath. “One, two, three…”
Slowly, but surely, Peter lifted Harry off the ground. Harry let him, even clinging onto him as Peter lifted him.
“It’s going to be okay, it’s going to be okay.” Peter whispered to him.
Once Peter felt confident that he was not going to drop Harry, he started walking out of the kitchen, making his way to the stairs. Harry let out some more painfully messy moans, seemingly trying to say something, but Peter could not understand anything.
“I’ve got you, Darling. I’ve got you.”
Peter had no idea if this would help him to feel better, but he had to try. They made it up the stairs okay, with Harry still clingy for dear life onto Peter. For probably the first time ever, Peter was fully and truly glad he had gotten superpowers. He did not know what he would have done if he had not been able to lift Harry. Peter awkwardly pushed his bedroom door open and walked to the bed. As he went to put him down, Harry gripped his jumper even tighter, so much so Peter thought it might rip it. A ripped jumper was the last of his concerns right now, but Peter did not want to force Harry to let go of him, to make him feel like he was being abandoned.
“I’m just putting you down on the bed, okay? I’m not leaving you, I just need to put you down and then I can come lie down next to you.” Peter explained, hoping Harry was rational enough to understand.
“Promise?” Harry asked in such a small and frightened voice Peter nearly let out a snob himself.
“I promise. I won’t leave you.” Peter replied right away before adding despite his better judgment. “Ever.”
Harry stayed silent, still gripping Peter’s clothes hard, before finally relaxing and letting Peter put him down. Peter rushed to lie down next to him, and as soon as he did, Harry snuggled against him, gripping his clothes again. Peter wrapped his arms around him and let him bury his face against his chest.
“I’m here. You’re safe and I’m here.”
As he repeated this over and over to Harry, kissing the top of his head in between and with his arms tightly wrapped around him, Peter realised he was at least partially saying this to smooth himself as well. It did not matter, though, all that mattered was Harry. After a while, Harry’s breathing started to become more even and Peter could not hear him snob anymore. He seemed to be calming down. That was good. Peter pondered a few seconds about what to do before asking:
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.”
Harry’s voice sounded so small that Peter could swear there was a black hole in his stomach, sucking all of his organs in. He had to remind himself, once again, that what he was feeling did not matter. Peter did not need to know what had happened exactly anyway, he had gotten the gist of it: Harry’s father was proving himself to be even worse than Peter had originally thought. If Peter was completely honest, he did not actually want to know what had happened exactly. He was not sure he could take it. He already knew it was probably about the gala, but he needed to be able to process that on his own later, not now when Harry did not need him so badly to care for. That, and also the fact he would probably go straight to wherever that motherfucker was and make him regret every single time he had hurt Harry. That would not be very productive, though. Thus, instead, Peter needed to focus on Harry and on how to help him.
“Okay, we can just keep lying down, for however long you want to.”
So they did, for hours. Peter ignored his hungry stomach, his muscles becoming sore from holding tightly Harry against him, and the snort on his jumper. Absolutely none of it mattered. When the sun set and darkness filled the room, Peter knew Harry must have been famished as well. Even if he was not, he still needed to eat.
“Do you want me to go grab you some food from the kitchen?” Peter asked.
Harry did not answer.
“I can order you some food? Whatever you want, I’ll get it for you.”
“I’m not hungry…” Harry replied, his voice muffled by Peter’s chest.
Peter stroked his hair, fighting a wave of both despair, caused by seeing Harry like this, and anger, towards his father.
“You need to eat.” Peter pleaded with him. “It’s not good to stay with your stomach empty like this.”
Once again, Harry did not reply. Peter stopped himself from sighing and decided to try a different approach.
“I’m really hungry. Do you mind if I go get myself to eat?”
Yes, of course Peter was starving after skipping lunch, but he was ready to give his entire meal to Harry. Harry tensed up and then pushed him away.
“Go. Go eat!” Harry sounded really upset. “I’m sorry, I should have…”
“It’s okay.” Peter cut him off. “I’ll be back quickly, okay?”
Harry nodded and Peter softly kissed his forehead before heading down to the kitchen. Once there, he pulled one of the ready meals they kept in case of a lazy day out of the freezer and quickly microwaved it. He then picked up two forks and made his way back to his bedroom. Harry was still in bed, but now seated and staring at the wall. His eyes were not only puffy and red, but also empty. This, this was the worst sight ever.
“We only had two servings meals.” Peter said.
This was a complete lie, but Harry did not need to know it.
“You might have to help me finish it.” Peter added, trying to not sound too hopeful.
This was also a lie, Peter would definitely be able to finish it on his own right now.
“I’m not hungry…”
Peter looked at Harry, unsure. He had no idea how to care for someone, he had never done so before. How was he supposed to make him eat? Peter started eating, hoping an idea would come to him once his stomach was not hurting as much. As he did, he noticed how Harry would give the food small glances. Peter felt his stomach become tighter but in a good way. Harry was starting to get hungry, that was good, very good, he might let Peter feed him.
“I…” Peter hesitated. “I don’t really like how the carrots taste, but I’d feel bad binning them. I don’t want to waste food.”
Harry was now looking at the carrots, staring at them even.
“Could you help me finish them, so I don’t have to?”
Harry still did not reply but kept staring at the carrots. Peter figured he would not get a better response and picked them up with his fork, before moving it towards Harry. Harry did not back away and was now staring at the fork. Okay, that was good, very good. As Peter’s fork got close to Harry’s mouth, Harry actually opened his mouth, making Peter want to scream in victory. He fed the carrots to Harry. Peter kept feeding all the remaining carrots to Harry, scared Harry would stop him if he gave him enough time to think about it. Then, Peter decided to try a similar tactic on the chicken, talking about how he did not really like its texture. Once again, it worked, and soon enough Harry had basically eaten one full serving. He was looking a bit better. Having him eat a bit had indeed been a good idea. Peter put the empty container with the forks in it on his desk. He would deal with that later.
“Thank you for making me eat.” Harry said, making Peter turn around. “You’ve got snort on your jumper, I’m sorry, that’s disgusting.”
Peter sat back down on the bed next to Harry and shook his head.
“It’s okay, I don’t mind.”
He would normally gag and die seeing someone else’s snort on him, but right now, he truly did not mind. However, he could see that Harry did very much mind. Thus, Peter quickly took off his jumper and threw it away from them on the floor.
“See? No more snort.”
“I’m full of snort, Peter.” Harry sighed. “I want to take a bath.”
Peter quickly nodded and stood back up.
“That’s no problem, I’ll make you a bath.” Peter eagerly replied.
He was so happy to see Harry responding and trying to take care of himself that he would run him one hundred baths if that was what he wanted.
“I can do it, you don’t have to…”
“It’s fine.” Peter cut him off. “Really.”
“Okay.”
As Peter walked to his bathroom, he saw Harry going back to staring into empty space. Peter needed to make him the most relaxing bath ever, and quickly. He started running the water, checking the temperature, before running to his parent’s bathroom. His mother had a bunch of fancy products that would make baths nice and stuff. Peter, and his father, were normally not allowed to use the products on their own as they “would put way too much and waste them”, but Peter was pretty sure his mother would not mind him wasting a bit of product in this situation. Peter did his best to figure out what to put and how much and, by some miracle, ended up with a rose-coloured bubble bath that smelled pretty nice. Harry would hopefully like it.
“The bath’s ready.” Peter said as he walked back into his bedroom.
Harry had still been staring at nothing, but hearing Peter’s voice seemed enough to make him come back down to earth.
“Thank you so much, Peter.”
Peter watched him slowly stand up, placing his feet far apart from each other. He then took a step toward the bathroom, moving his arm a bit strangely. Was he feeling light-headed? Crying as much as he had must have taken a lot of energy and the food had not had the time to replenish it yet.
“Do you need help?”
Harry stopped walking, staying in that weird wide stance and looking down. Peter waited, not wanting to make him uncomfortable or possibly make him fall down by just going and helping him.
“Yes.” He replied, still looking down.
Peter stepped towards him and slowly put an arm around him. Harry let him, putting his own arm around Peter’s shoulder. Together, they walked to the bathroom. Once there, Peter helped him sit down next to the bathtub. Harry started to remove his jumper, and Peter was unsure of what to do. Was he supposed to help him? Was he supposed to leave? It would probably be better and safer if he helped Harry get into the bathtub to make sure he would not slip while doing so, however, it would mean seeing him naked. They had seen each other and slept one against the other without a single clothes on just the previous night, but this felt somehow different.
“Can you help me with my trousers? Please.”
Coming back to earth, Peter noticed that Harry was now bare chest and looking at him. Right, Peter was going to help him undress and get into the bathtub.
“I just need to hold onto you while I take them off, if you don’t mind.” Harry explained.
“Of course not.” Peter smiled his softest smile.
He helped Harry up and let him hold on to him as he undid his trousers. Peter hesitated a few seconds, not wanting to cross a line and make Harry uncomfortable when he already seemed so vulnerable, before saying:
“I can also help you get into the bathtub so you don’t slip. Only if you want to, of course.”
Harry stayed silent for a bit, stopping to work on his trousers, before finally answering with his head still down.
“I would really appreciate it.”
“Okay.”
Peter smiled to himself and kept helping Harry to stabilise himself as he removed his trousers and underwear. Once Harry was naked, Peter helped him get into the bathtub by giving him one of his arms to hold onto while his other arm was hovering around him, ready to catch him if he were to slip or anything. He then helped him down to sit in the tub.
“Is the water okay?” Peter asked. “Or is it too cold or too hot?”
“It’s fine.” Harry mumbled. Then, suddenly, his eyes widened and he looked absolutely panicked. “My mother’s ring. I need to take it off! It’s bad for the ring, I cannot bath with it.”
“It’s okay.” Peter quickly got on his knees, scared that Harry might try to stand and in his panic slip. “I can take the necklace off for you.”
Harry nodded and slightly leaned forward to help Peter. Peter very carefully undid the necklace, not wanting to drop it or the ring in the bath, and placed it in his hand. He had to put it somewhere safe where nothing could happen to the ring and where it would also ease Harry’s mind.
“I’m going to go put it in a box in my room so it’s safe, okay?”
This did seem to work as Peter was able to actually see Harry’s muscles relax and he started leaning his back against the bathtub. Peter stood back up, minding the ring and necklace he was holding, and started walking to the bathroom door.
“Wait.” Harry quickly said, no longer resting his back. Peter of course stopped and looked at him. “You’ll come back, right? Once you’ve put the necklace in a box, you’ll come back?”
Peter had actually not been sure whether he was supposed to come back or let Harry relax by himself in the bath. He had, obviously, noticed how his presence had helped soothe Harry, but with Harry now naked in the bath, he had been worried his presence might make Harry feel too vulnerable. However, after hearing those questions, Peter knew he absolutely was going to stay with Harry during his bath.
“I will.” Peter replied. “I promise.”
Harry sighed, closed his eyes, and leaned back again. Peter quickly went to put the necklace somewhere safe. He grabbed a padded box where he kept some valuable parts of his collection he did not display. Without thinking twice about it, he removed his things from the box and put the necklace and ring in it instead. He then placed it on his desk so they would not miss it and Peter would remember to put it back on Harry as soon as he was dry enough. Then, Peter went back to his bathroom. Harry still had his eyes closed, but he did not seem very relaxed. His eyebrows were furrowed and his jaw was clenched. As soon as he apparently heard Peter, he opened his eyes again and reached for him. Peter quickly took his hand and sat back down next to the bathtub.
“I’m here. I’m here.”
And so Peter stayed next to him, caressing his hand with his thumb and repeating those words over and over again, along with:
“I love you.”
Notes:
"[...] also I hate you and I'm gonna keep Harry safe in my pocket" - Yen, my beta reader, reacting to this chapter
Chapter 31: Behind the mask
Notes:
We are finally starting the second semester, can you believe it?
This chapter is quite long, but don’t worry, we will get back to more reasonable words per chapter counts after this one.
Anyway, as always, I hope you enjoy the chapter and the next one will be posted on the 1st of December.Content Warnings
Flashbacks
From “Talking about what he had seen inside the lab was totally Peter’s favourite activity.” to “Maybe if he had more time to mentally prepare…”
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The great Norman Osborn had cut off his one and only son. That was what Harry had revealed to Peter after his bath. The news had enraged Peter so much so that he had nearly lost his shit in front of Harry. Luckily, or unluckily, Harry had still been gripping him tightly enough to prevent Peter from actually jumping on the first possible plane to go talk to the monster. What Peter had still done, however, was calling his parents and explaining the situation to them before asking them to come back as soon as possible so they could discuss what to do. They did and after talking at length, a course of action had been formed: Peter’s parents would fully support Harry financially. Harry had tried to refuse, saying he was not worth it, but that had been quickly shut down. Peter was pretty sure that Harry seeing how Peter’s parents had gotten so angry at his father and at the notion he was not worthy of their financial support had done him a lot of good. Indeed, it had, hopefully, shown Harry that he had three people who truly cared about him. Maybe even a fourth person cared about him as Peter was pretty sure that Uncle Rhodey had indeed gotten attached to Harry and had probably also lost his shit upon hearing the news. Furthermore, it had been decided that Harry would keep living in his own flat instead of moving in completely with Peter and they would support him until he was done with his studies and making enough money even if the two of them were to break up one day. Peter would have liked to maybe actually move in together with Harry and he had obviously not liked thinking about them breaking up but he understood why those clauses were needed. It was so that the fact Peter’s parents were now supporting Harry would not affect their relationship by making Harry feel like he had to stay with Peter and Peter worried that Harry might be in a relationship with him just so he could be supported by his parents.
They also had to change the day on which they flew back to MIT. They had originally been supposed to fly back a few days after their second date so they would have more than enough time to get settled back into their flat and get ready for classes by doing some study. However, with Harry’s state and all the things Peter’s parents had had to sort out for Harry – such as getting the lease of his flat transferred to them, making sure his father would not have access to any bank account on which they would put money for him, and so on – their departure had been delayed by a week. This meant they ended up with less than a week to get ready for class. This was fine though, all that mattered was that Harry was not going to be left to dry and that Peter’s parents could properly take care of him. Once back at MIT, Harry had stayed over at Peter’s for the first two nights. He had gotten somewhat better, but things were still hard for him, Peter could see it. For example, Harry would follow him all around the flat, like one of those puppies glued to their owners. Peter was neither annoyed nor bothered by it. Of course, he was not, he understood, but it did make him worry about his boyfriend. What made him worry even more was how reluctant Harry was to show his face outside. Peter could not blame him, though, not after it had been “leaked” that he had been cut off and probably disinherited. For some odd reason, Peter was having trouble believing that the gossip magazines had just been so good at stalking people that they had managed to come across paperwork or something else stupid, not when the father of the century was involved.
Despite his somewhat still fragile state, it had been agreed that it would be better for Harry to spend a couple of days alone at his flat so he could get used to it again before classes resumed. On the one hand, Peter did not really understand that decision: if Harry was feeling better by staying at Peter’s place, why make him go back to his? Would it not be better for him to be with someone who loves him after being betrayed by his own father? On the other hand, Peter had kind of been hoping to spend the weekend alone. It was not because he was sick of Harry, of course not, but rather because it allowed him to meet with Gwen without having to come up with an excuse. Indeed, as soon as Peter had let Gwen know he was back in town, she had requested for them to meet as soon as possible. It had made Peter realise how much he had enjoyed being away for Christmas. Harry not going to the lab and instead being safe in his arms had removed so much of his anxiety, anxiety that was now coming back in full force. Maybe Harry should indeed move in with Peter? The one good thing that came from Harry’s father cutting him off was that Harry was in no state to work, meaning he was not planning on going to the lab for at least a few weeks. This left Peter some time to figure out what to do with the lab and, even if it was a dick move, maybe try to use the fact his father had cut him off to convince Harry to not go back to the lab at all. Would Peter still try to shut down the lab if Harry was to leave it on his own accord? He was not sure he would. Would that make him a bad person? It did not matter anyway right now, as far as Peter knew, Harry was not thinking about quitting and thus he still needed to prepare for a second break-in. Hence why he was going to meet with Gwen.
They met at her flat on Saturday evening. Peter had been careful to not be followed while on his way there and to blend in as much as possible when entering her building, as he did so every time he had to go there for a check-up. He really did not want the people at the lab to notice that the same guy would visit Gwen every once in a while and start to try to figure out who he was. Only once he was knocking at her door did Peter let himself relax. He might be paranoid, but he was probably right to be. The first thing Peter noticed when Gwen opened the door was the empty look in her eyes. It was the same that had been inhabiting Harry’s eyes lately. She made him rush inside, which was more than okay with Peter as one could never know how safe the hallway really was.
“Hi,” Peter awkwardly said.
He removed his coat and set it down on the couch.
“Hi, Peter.” Gwen took a deep breath, closing her eyes and shaking her head while doing so. When she opened her eyes again, that empty look had disappeared and she had her usual expression again. “I’ve got everything set up to take your vitals, let’s do that first.”
“Sounds good.”
Peter sat down in his usual chair, because of course he had a usual chair for when a biology student would take his vitals to make sure a weird spider’s bite was not slowly killing him, that made total sense! He then let Gwen do her thing. As she did, Peter wondered if he should try to address the fact that something was clearly weighing on her. They were not friends by any means, Peter still did not trust her fully as he knew his wellbeing was not as important to her as shutting down the lab, but she was taking care of him, helping him to make sure he was not dying. Yes, it was probably only so he could be useful to her, both when it came to shutting down the lab and from a scientific standpoint, but they were still some sort of partners in crime. Who knew, maybe actually talking about that kind of stuff could help them get along a bit better and would be beneficial later on as they worked together.
“How was your Christmas?” Peter asked, trying to start a conversation.
“Not great since I was stuck in my flat and not able to visit my family, but at least no one tried to break into my flat yet, so maybe that was my Christmas gift this year,” Gwen replied as she drew some blood for Peter.
“Right, sorry.”
Yeah, that had been a fair reply as Peter had been stupid asking her that, of course, she had spent it alone and worried. It did make Peter feel a bit guilty for having had a good time with his family and Harry, but at the same time, he had deserved it. He had only gotten into this mess because he had tried to help Gwen. Gwen, on the other hand, had been much more involved with the lab from the start.
“Everything looks good so far,” Gwen said as she put away the blood vials to look at them later under the microscope Peter had bought so they could better monitor his health. “Any new symptoms? Or did you notice any change in pre-existing ones?”
Peter thought back to everything that had happened during the Christmas break. He had not really noticed anything weird. To be honest, he had, at times, even forgotten he had been bitten by a messed up spider. There had been, however, three occasions on which it had been shoved right back up to his face. First, there had been when Uncle Bruce had surprised him. Then there had been when he had gotten so overstimulated during their time at Disneyland that Harry had had to carry him to bed. Finally, there had been the time he had gotten so angry at Uncle Rhodey that he had started to lose his cool. It had been the second time that he had gotten much angrier than he had ever been before being bitten. Peter wondered if he should mention it to Gwen or not. It was not like she could do anything about it, so it was probably useless, and it was not like he had completely lost his shit for no reason so it was probably not even related to the spider’s bite.
“I’m very jumpy sometimes and I’m still struggling with staying in busy environments for long periods.” Peter shrugged.
“It makes sense,” Gwen replied, nodding. “Your reflexes and spatial awareness have been really enhanced and we’ve also worked on how to develop and use them. It’s not surprising you’re experiencing those side effects. As long as it does not hinder you too much in your everyday life, I don’t think there is any cause for concern.”
Those side effects had caused Peter to ridicule himself during a family photo and to basically pass out after his first date, but yes, he supposed it was not that bad. He could have punched Uncle Bruce, for example. Well, he had nearly punched him, yes, but he had managed to stop himself in time. Anyway, Gwen was right: as long as it was not causing Peter too many problems, it did not really matter as they had much more important things to deal with. Speaking of those, they should probably figure out what to do next.
“Okay.”
Peter watched her put all of her things away, trying to gather the courage to bring up that dreaded subject. He took a few deep breaths, trying to push down his anxiety, and strangely wished Harry was there.
“I don’t think I need any more boxing lessons,” Peter said.
He would have loved continuing those so he could have an excuse for them to not move on to the actual break-in stage, but he could not do that when Harry’s safety might still be on the line.
“I agree,” Gwen said with a confidence that surprised Peter.
It seemed like she had been thinking about what to do next as well and she was also eager to get to that topic. She finished putting everything away before sitting down at the table they had used, across from Peter.
“That’s why I have been writing down everything I remember about the lab, its layout, security measures I know of, everything and anything that might be helpful to us. Unfortunately, I’m probably forgetting things as it has been months since I set foot in there, and I’m not going to stalk them or try to go back in there when they would probably still love to silence me for good, if you get what I mean.” Gwen nervously laughed before grabbing a notebook and a pen that had been sitting further on the table. “I was hoping you might be able to fill in some blanks. They probably had changed things after I left, so it might help us get more updated information. There is still the very likely risk that they really amped up the security after your break-in, though.”
Gwen’s monologue had made Peter feel very overwhelmed very quickly as he had not really expected it. He should have had, as it was their goal to break into the lab again to actually get evidence this time, but he had not. Or maybe he had wished that, for some reason, somehow, there would have been another step to go through before getting to the break-in. All of what Gwen had said was making his head spin.
“Right, yes.” Peter tried to take a deep breath, but it felt shallow. “I have notes. I took notes, before breaking in. Schematics of the place I found online, at what time people would leave from the backdoor, that kind of stuff.”
“That’s good, you can give me those so I can compare them to what I have.” Gwen nodded eagerly. “I know we should have done this right away when you found me and when your memory was fresher, but walk me through your break-in. The more details the better.”
Talking about what he had seen inside the lab was totally Peter’s favourite activity. It was not as if even thinking about it would make him feel like his ribcage was trying to smother him and make his skin crawl. He could do this, though. He could walk Gwen through what had happened, he just needed to take deep breaths and shut everything off in his brain. Peter closed his eyes, breathing in as deeply as his lungs let him. He was tempted to picture Harry with a hand in his hair, as it would always smooth him when he did that, but Peter was scared that thinking about Harry while talking about the lab would only freak him out more. Peter opened his eyes again and picked a spot behind Gwen to stare at. He decided that the light switch was a good thing to focus on. He then proceeded to recount how he had made his way to the lab, using what he had gathered during his stakeouts to avoid bumping into anyone. He mentioned the two gadgets he had built that had failed on the door, and how he had managed to open it by basically blowing up a tiny device he had put in the door’s keyhole. Peter described the hallway he had found himself in upon entering the lab, and how crowded it had been with supplies. For some reason, this seemed to annoy Gwen. She did not seem annoyed at Peter, though, more at what he was describing. It was probably not worth asking her about it. As Peter told Gwen about how he had chosen what room to go in, picking one he had seen in the plans should be big and he had heard no noise coming from it, he started having trouble breathing again, his chest feeling too tight, and a sense of dread was taking over him.
“So I opened the door, and…” Peter grabbed onto his legs, trying to stop his hands from shaking. “and I…”
Flashes of what he had seen in that room filled his mind. It was as if he was in two places at once, both in Gwen’s living room and back in that room. He closed his eyes, hoping it would also shut off the pictures of the cages playing in his mind, but they only felt even more overwhelming. Peter quickly opened his eyes, looking around him again, trying to understand how he could be in two places at once. He was in Gwen’s flat, he knew it, and he could see it, but at the same time, as he looked around, he kept seeing that horrible room.
“Peter, breathe. Breathe for me.”
Peter tried, but his breaths kept being so shallow as if someone was sitting on his ribcage. He looked around, his fear rising, making him want to run as far as he could.
“Peter, focus on me, okay?”
A hand grabbed his arm and Peter jumped. What was that?! Anything but that spider, please, anything but that spider. Scared of what he was going to see, Peter looked at his arm. It was a hand, Gwen’s hand. Right, he was with Gwen, in her flat.
“Does this help?” Gwen asked.
Strangely, it did. Peter would usually not like physical touch except if it was coming from his family or Harry, but right now, it really did help. Thus, Peter nodded.
“Okay, focus on it,” Gwen said, tightening her hold. “Can you feel that?”
Something was tapping Peter’s arm right where Gwen was holding him. It was rhythmic and kept repeating itself. Peter tried to move his head along, nodding to reproduce the pattern.
“Very good. Let’s keep going.”
So they did, with Gwen even vocalising the pattern. Peter focused on both her touch and voice, keeping on doing his best to nod along. Slowly, the word around him became clearer and he could only see the inside of Gwen’s flat. Peter could also breathe better again, not feeling his chest being crushed anymore. Still, he did not feel very good. How was he going to go in the room when he could not even think about it?! Maybe if he had more time to mentally prepare…
“I don’t know if I’m ready to go back,” Peter said, moving his arm away from Gwen’s touch and looking away.
It was strange, he was fully able to speak. Freaking out would normally make him go completely silent. Gwen, on the other hand, did stay silent. Peter could feel her gaze on him. She was probably pissed he was giving her so much trouble. It was not like Peter was doing it on purpose or as if it was fun for him, though.
“We can work around this,” Gwen finally said, sounding oddly sure of herself. “You don’t have to go back into that room, we don’t want you to… possibly freeze while you are in there. We just need you to get proof of the experiments and we can do that by accessing a computer somewhere else and by getting researchers’ reports and notes. There will definitely be logs and reports with pictures in them, but you won’t have to see them, of course.”
Peter still did not like this plan, at all, but it meant he would not have to go back into that room. Anything but that room. Peter took a deep breath and realised his muscles felt sore. He needed to think properly. Thus, he tried to fully soothe himself by rocking back and forth and then closed his eyes to focus. Did Gwen’s plan make sense? He would get logs and reports from some random computer, kind of like what he had tried to do. This led to the first thing they needed to figure out: how to make sure the break-in would not have the same outcome as the last.
“What about if I lose the USB key again? We will not get a third shot,” Peter said right as an idea came to his mind. “We can make it so it automatically sends the files to an online server or something. We’ll have to make sure they cannot trace it and you’ll have to get the files back up somewhere as soon as they get on that server, though. I think I can set that up.”
“I can also help with that, I picked up a few things when working with their systems,” Gwen said.
Okay, that was good, very good. Two things solved. What else? Peter kept rocking, his eyes still shut tight. If the goal was to get to any computer they had at the lab, it meant that the computers must share files somehow. That was usually done with online servers. If they had those, could they not just try to hack them? Peter was no hacker, but he still knew how to get access to some stuff and if it was too much for him he was sure they could find someone who could help them out. It was tricky and risky, but it still sounded much better than Peter having to go in.
“Can’t we just hack them without going in?” Peter asked.
“No, they keep everything completely offline, they use ethernet cables to share the files between the computers. We need to physically access a computer to get the proof.”
Shit, this would have been too easy. Why could the people running the lab have not been more careless?!
“Right.”
Peter kept wracking his brain for other possible problems or solutions, but he was coming up empty. He would have to think about this again later once he was calmer. No, actually, there was one last thing. Peter opened his eyes.
“I’ve learnt how to fight, but I have never fought someone, not properly,” Peter said.
Fighting with his boxing teacher did not really count, it was in such a controlled environment, and the only time he had possibly tried to fight someone, he had gotten beaten up instead of Gwen. Was it really smart to go from a bunch of theory to the make-or-break thing?
“What if I freeze up? What if I forget everything I have learnt?”
Gwen was looking at him strangely. Peter was not sure what exactly was going on in her brain.
“Peter, if I may remind you, the goal is for you to not have to fight anyone. We want you to go in and out undetected. You only took those lessons so you would know how to defend yourself.”
She sounded not exactly annoyed, but she was clearly unpleased with something. Was she concerned that Peter was trying to stall the break-in from happening? Was he doing that? Maybe he was as he, deep down, was desperately holding onto the hope that Harry was now going to leave the lab as he was not under his father’s thumb anymore and Peter would have not to break in at all. However, even if Peter were stalling, it did not make his concerns any less valid.
“I know, but what if I’m attacked for real and I freeze?” Peter asked. “Last time I was attacked, that’s kind of what happened.”
This was not exactly true, but not completely false either. Yes, Peter had frozen when he had been punched while protecting Gwen, but that was mainly because he had no idea how to fight. Gwen sighed and leaned back in her chair, this time clearly annoyed.
“What do you want us to do? We cannot really plan for you to be attacked!”
Could they not? It was pretty easy to get attacked, you just needed to put your nose where it did not belong. Peter had learnt that the hard way. For some reason, Peter could feel that Gwen was not going to love his idea.
“I could…” Gwen shot him a very annoyed look. Yep, she was going to hate this idea. “…go into the city and look for trouble?”
“What do you mean ‘look for trouble’?”
Gwen sounded so much like Peter’s mother when she was angry at him that Peter could not help but wince, already regretting suggesting this.
“Well, you know, look for people doing bad things and… intervene?”
Gwen silently stared at him for a few seconds before suddenly getting up, nearly knocking her chair over.
“You’re kidding, right? You’ve got to be kidding, you’re not actually suggesting you become some kind of… of vigilante! Do you know how stupid that would be, Peter?”
Instinctively, Peter also stood up. Gwen was looking like she was about to pull all of her hair out of frustration, but Peter knew he had a point.
“Stupider than breaking into a lab where they do fucked up experiments and tried to silence you by beating you up?” He snapped back.
“Yes! Infinitely stupider!” Gwen shouted, her mouth staying agape and looking at Peter like he had grown another head.
She then put her head in her hands, letting out a frustrated groan. Peter wondered if she was going to tap her feet too. She did not, but when she looked again at him, he could swear she was about to chase him around the flat. He could somehow feel it in his bones.
“You don’t want to go around, showing off your powers before you break into a lab where they do ‘fucked up experiments’ and ‘fucked up’ things!” She said, using air quotes.
Gwen had a point, it was probably not really smart to possibly reveal his powers before breaking into the lab. However, it did not invalidate or solve Peter’s issue. It was as if she was not listening to him and was only focusing on what she thought he should or should not do. She was not the boss here, Peter had the right to prepare however he needed to!
“I just don’t feel ready to go in without having fought someone for real at least once!” Peter yelled. “It’s easy for you to say what’s smart or not smart when you’re not the one that will be in actual danger! You’ll be safe, in your flat, while I risk my butt! So if I want to go fight someone, I will.”
Peter’s frustration at how unfair all of this was had reached his maximum and he simply could not take it anymore.
“You can’t hype me up by pretending I’m going to be some kind of superhero so I can undo your mistakes and then get upset when I want to do something that basically all the superheroes have done!” Peter wanted to scream, shout, kick, about the burden that had been placed upon him but could not, not in front of Gwen. “I’ll do this, and you will let me.”
He looked at Gwen as he breathed hard to drown all the screams forming in his throat. Gwen did not move and her face had become unreadable to Peter. Suddenly, Peter wondered if they could have been friends in other circumstances. They were both smart and determined, and deep down just wanted to do what was right, they just disagreed on what was ‘right’. Maybe they could have gotten along. Maybe they could become friends by the end of this, but what was sure, is they were not friends right now and Peter had to make sure he kept himself safe because Gwen would not. Who would be left to properly protect Harry if Peter could not?
“Okay,” Gwen said while her face still unreadable.
“Okay?” Peter asked, not sure what she meant by it.
“Okay, we’ll go ahead with your stupid plan.”
Gwen sat down, basically dropping onto her chair. Peter did the same, feeling awkward. He might have won the argument, but somehow, it did not feel like a win. He was not sure what to do, should they be planning how he was going to get his fighting experience exactly? Would Gwen help him with that, or would she say it is his problem to deal with? Peter would have to find out by trying to talk to her about it.
“I need something to hide my identity, when I’m, you know…” Peter did not dare repeat his so-called stupid plan, even though they had agreed to go along with it. “I cannot wear the ski mask again, it might slip or something.”
Peter could not overemphasise how much he had hated wearing that sweaty ski mask during his boxing lessons. So yes, he was worried it might slip and reveal his face, but he was also really desperate to wear anything but that.
“I might have something,” Gwen sighed.
Strangely, Peter felt a big sense of relief upon seeing that Gwen was still going to help him with this despite her being against it. Maybe it was because it meant he would not be doing this alone. Peter watched her stand up and get something from the small dresser on which she kept her only plant. What she was now holding had wrapping paper around it, as if it was a gift. Was it a gift? Why would Gwen be gifting him something? She chucked the mystery item onto the table, meaning it was nothing fragile. Peter just looked at it, confused. It did really look like a gift.
“Well, open it,” Gwen said as she nodded towards the gift.
She was still standing up, with her arms crossed and looking at Peter expectantly. Right, Peter took the gift and started to unwrapping it. It revealed some kind of clothing. It somewhat looked like a shirt, but there was too much of whatever this was to be just a shirt. Its texture was also quite weird, it was not made of any of the usual fabrics which would be used to make a shirt. Well, it could be some type of spandex, but it also had those weird black 3D lines on top of it. Peter unfolded it, holding it up to try to figure out what it was. It had red sections and some blue ones as well. Uh, it had all three of Peter’s favourite colours. He had told Gwen what those were back during their first training section, but Peter would be surprised she had remembered such a trivial fact about him. The colours did really go well together, though. As Peter moved the garment around, he realised it was some kind of jumpsuit. He stood up and held it at arm’s length to see it fully. The jumpsuit would cover his entire body except for his head. It also had a big black logo on the front that looked like a spider.
That’s when it hit him. Spider-man, that was the name Gwen had come up with when she had tried to make him feel like a superhero. This was a superhero suit. That thought gave Peter chills.
“This was supposed to be an ‘I believe in you' gift, but I guess you can wear that while you’re being an idiot,” Gwen said, looking away.
“Thank you,” Peter sincerely replied.
He could not believe what he was holding: his very own superhero suit. He had never imagined he would get one, or if he did, it would have been more symbolic and probably coming from his father. Peter looked at the red in his suit, a colour he would always associate with his father. The moment suddenly felt bittersweet as he could not help himself from wishing his father was there to experience it with him. He would be so proud, but Peter knew he would not let him do what he needed to do. Thus, Peter had to have this moment alone. Well, not completely alone, there was Gwen who had been the one to get him that suit.
“How did you pull this off?” He asked.
“I used the measurements I took under the guise of monitoring you.” Gwen shrugged and picked up something Peter had left on the table. “Here. Don’t worry, it won’t slip, I’ll show you how.”
Peter took whatever she was handing him, and after looking at it for a few seconds, he realised it was a mask. It matched the rest of the suit, it would be weird if it did not, and had two big shells that were probably covering some eyes-holes or something. They looked a bit weird as they were so big and like half circles that had been a bit squished. Staring at the mask for a bit longer, Peter realised they were probably meant to look like spiders’ eyes. Lovely, Peter loved spiders. It made sense as the superhero name they had chosen for him was “Spider-Man”, so of course his suit would have spider vibes. Still, this whole spider-theme thing was making Peter a bit nervous, as he would generally try to not think too much about spiders after his last encounter with one. It was pretty ironic: Spider-Man did not like spiders. Leave it to Peter to be stupid like that. Well, Batman was afraid of bats, so, at least to comics’ standard, Peter’s superhero name was not that ridiculous despite his dislike of spiders. Yeah, he will just pretend this was simply some clever and funny reference to Batman.
“So? Do you like it? I hope you do because it was not cheap, you’re not getting another one unless you’re paying for it.”
“I do!” Peter quickly replied, snapping back to earth. “I do, it’s great! It looks awesome.”
Gwen smiled. That was definitely a strange sight as she would always look so serious and focused, or, well, was mad at Peter. Her smile sure did make her look less scary. Gwen must have gotten annoyed or weirded out by Peter looking at her like that as her smile disappeared.
“Go try it on, then! I need to know if it fits you properly. If it doesn't I need to send it back asap so they fix it.” Gwen said, shooing Peter towards a hallway in her flat as if he were a pesky duck. “You can change in the bathroom, don’t make a mess.”
“Okay, alright!” Peter exclaimed as he hurried to move. “I’ll try it on then.”
Based on how Gwen was shooing him, Peter deduced the bathroom should be the first door in the hallway and quickly went there. It was the first time that he had seen a room that was not the living room in Gwen’s flat. The bathroom was smaller than his, but not so small that it was completely cramped. There were a lot of products and things everywhere. They, somehow, looked both organised and disorganised at the same time. Gwen probably had a method in her madness, Peter just could not see it due to his lack of knowledge. Harry probably could. Harry was probably sad, all alone right now. Nope, not the time to think about that, it was time to try to get into a spandex suit. Seeing Peter in a spandex suit would probably cheer Harry up, but that would not happen any time soon.
After struggling a bit, or more like a lot, causing him to nearly lose his shit, Peter managed to put it on. It was actually not too tight, it was just a pain to put on. It seemed to fit nicely, a bit too nicely even. Peter felt like a twelve-year-old wearing a Halloween costume. Thank goodness, he was not actually as short as a twelve-year-old, but he was probably as scrawny. He might have gotten some crazy strength, but he surely did not look like he had. His body had visually not changed. It kind of made him wish he had gotten something like that super-soldier serum Captain America had gotten which had apparently magically made him taller and buffer. True, Peter would have had a lot of explaining to do, but at least he would not look ridiculous in his suit. Peter fought the urge to take off the suit and instead put on the mask. He had expected it to not be very breathable, but he could actually breathe just fine. Thank fuck this was not a ski mask 2.0, Peter was actually going to be able to breathe. He could see very well through the weird shells, so that was nice too. Focusing on that and not what he looked like in the mirror, Peter went back to the living room to show Gwen.
“You look great!” Gwen enthusiastically said, rushing to where he was standing. “It fits you perfectly. Good.”
“Thanks,” Peter awkwardly said.
At least Gwen liked how he looked in it. She would probably tell him if he looked like an idiot, so it was a bit comforting. Still, Peter would rather not think about what he looked like right now. Thus, he wracked his brain for a way to change the topic so Gwen would stop looking at him like he was some kind of new collectable figurine she had to make sure had absolutely no damages or imperfections before buying it.
“It covers all of my skin,” Peter remarked, looking at his covered hands. “Am I going to be able to stick to things?”
That was a fair question and it would bring them back to the vigilante topic as he would definitely have to be able to stick to things to use his powers properly. Gwen’s face became more serious again as her eyes narrowed and her brows furrowed slightly.
“That won’t be a problem,” She said in a voice that made Peter want to believe her without asking any other follow-up questions. “Try to stick to the chair or something.”
Peter had to give it to her, Gwen was great at sounding confident and giving orders. No wonder she had become important enough to get to know about the lab’s dirty secrets despite still being a master's student. Peter almost envied her. As he was not completely crazy, Peter obeyed her and put his hand on the backrest of the chair. He spread his fingers to cover more surface so he would be able to lift the chair easier if he did somehow managed to stick to it despite the suit. He then focused. He still did not fully understand how, what, and why he would manage to stick to things, but he had figured out that it was partly based on instincts and his mood as he would get stickier the more he got anxious. It was thankfully also based on intent as repeating the word “stick” over and over in his mind would usually do the trick. Thus, that is what he did here. Once he felt ready, his brain somehow making him feel sticky in the same way it would make you feel thirsty or needing to pee or to sleep, Peter started to bring his hand towards himself and the chair actually followed. Peter stared at it, then at Gwen.
“How?”
Gwen immediately smiled, straightening her back and even slightly puffing her chest. She was absolutely proud of herself, meaning she had done something completely awesome, and Peter could not wait to hear her explanation.
“I need to thank you, actually. Well, I’m the one who figured out everything from the data you provided, but I still need to give you partial credit since you’re the one who was crazy enough to get yourself bitten by a spider,” She said, waving her hand around dismissively. “You know how we figured out you could stick to stuff because you are using Van Der Waals forces?”
Peter let go of the chair and sat back down, figuring this was going to be a complex conversation. He nodded, remembering well how during one of their checkup he had spent way too much time sticking to stuff, having his fingertips examined, and reading way too many scientific papers about spiders for his comfort.
“Basically, yeah.”
It was a tiny bit more complicated than that, but they did not need to have another scientific debate about that right now. Maybe later, though, as Peter always liked those.
“Well I used what we learnt, and, while you were enjoying your Christmas break with your family, I worked and managed to create fabric using those same principles as you do.”
Peter thought about what Gwen was saying. This was insane if it was true. Well, it was true, it had just seen the proof of it. What she had managed to do was absolutely genius, she could probably sell her research and findings to tech industries or even the army for crazy amounts. Peter was pretty sure his own father would be willing to pay her a nice generous amount for her discovery. However, there was a tiny little problem: where she had gotten her data from. With the lab still running and her having done questionable things, it would be a mess if she were to share her discovery. There was also the problem that Peter had been the one providing her with the data she had needed, and thus she would have to reveal his superpowers to explain her research. Still, it felt unfair to not let her share her amazing invention. Maybe, once they were done with the lab, they would be able to work something out so she could get recognised for her work without putting Peter in danger.
“This is amazing! It’s nuts!” Peter let out, still in disbelief.
Gwen’s smile widened. It was the second time in one night that Peter had seen her genuinely smile. He had not expected that.
“I know. But we still need you to stick to the suit for it to work. I could not wear the suit and stick to things like you do. The suits would stick to things, yes, but I would not be able to climb up a wall, as I would not actually be able to apply force to then lift my body.”
Peter frowned. That would definitely be a setback when trying to sell her invention.
“Did you look into if it would be possible to have both sides of the suits able to stick to things? It would probably be complicated because you would probably have forces cancelling each other out, but it is still worth exploring.”
“No, because I did not need to, since, you know, you already stick to things, and like you said, it would probably be a pain to deal with,” Gwen replied, raising an eyebrow.
That was a fair response, it was not on their important things to do right now. Maybe later, once they were done with the lab, they would be able to work together to figure out if this was possible. It would probably be very fun.
“What about when I shoot webs?” Peter asked, looking down at his forearms, trying to see how she had dealt with that. “Did you put tiny holes or something?”
“Yes. It’s not the most elegant solution, but it should do the job and I was already making so many weird requests to the poor couturier. I’m pretty sure they either figured out the suit was going to be for some sort of vigilante, there are already so many wannabe vigilantes out there, or thought I was into weird things that I do not want to start theorising about,” Gwen said, shuttering.
Peter also did not want to think about what the couturier might have thought this suit was for.
“As long as I can shoot the webs.” Peter shrugged.
“Here.”
Gwen quickly grabbed that empty plastic bottle of orange juice that was now always sitting on her coffee table. It was so much covered by old webs that you could barely see the label anymore. Peter did not want to think about how this would look like to someone unaware of his powers either. Peter stood up and, with a flick of a wrist, shot a web. He had become quite a natural at it. Unlike with his stickiness, he knew how to control it well now. The web left his wrist as normal, meaning the little hole was exactly at the right spot. It was tiny enough that Peter could not see it, at least not with the mask on. Peter might have worried about the hole getting unaligned as he moved around but with how perfectly the suit fitted him, that seemed unlikely to happen. Maybe this was why the suit had to be so perfectly tight on him. Peter then shot a web with his other wrist and, once again, there was no issue.
“Okay, I can stick to stuff and shoot webs,” Peter summed up. “Anything else I should check or know about?”
“Well, can you breathe and see properly?” Gwen asked.
Yes, that was quite an important thing to check, but Peter was pretty sure he would have told her right away if he had had any issues doing those things. Peter fought the urge to reply sarcastically. He was not close enough with Gwen that it would be seen as banter and would instead sour the mood that was surprisingly good right now. Peter definitely did not want to do that.
“I think so,” He replied instead, shrugging. “I have no complaints, so…”
“Good.” Gwen nodded. “I’ll show you how to take off, put back on and secure your mask properly in case you need to, but first, I have one last surprise for you.”
“Oh?”
Peter was very curious to see what that last surprise was. He usually was not the biggest fan of surprises, the unknown aspect of it stressed him out, but based on everything Gwen had already shown him and explained about the suit, he knew it was going to be something good. Gwen walked to her small shelf and grabbed a pair of wireless earphones. She put them on as Peter watched and formed hypotheses in his mind. He was really hoping she was going to reveal that she had put a communication system in his suit and not that she was about to immobilise him with some high-pitched frequency sounds or something.
“Hello, Peter.”
Peter jumped a few feet back and nearly had a heart attack. He might have just theorised about some communication system in his suit but having her basically talking directly in his ear without warning had still scared the living shit out of him. His heart was beating way too fast and his breath had been knocked out of him. He should really work on not being so easily startled if he did not want to freak out during their lab break-in.
“I’m going to make an educated guess and say you can hear me,” Gwen said again in Peter’s ears as her hand hid her mouth and she looked him up and down.
“Yeah, no shit!” Peter let out, not able to contain some of his sass anymore. “It’s like you suddenly popped up next to both of my ears.”
“Have you never used earbuds or headphones to make a call?” Gwen asked as she raised an eyebrow.
Of course, Peter had, but he was obviously not wearing earbuds or headphones right now. Gwen must have had some kind of tiny speaker in his suit where his earholes were.
“Will other people be able to hear you?” Peter asked instead of snapping back at her.
Gwen shook her head.
“No, only you. But they will hear you talk.”
Okay, that made sense and it was okay. Peter could work with that.
“Will you be able to talk to me when I break into the lab?” Peter asked.
“Yes. That’s why I added this.”
A wave of relief hit Peter square in the chest. His shoulders dropped and he could suddenly breathe easier. Peter’s legs even started to feel so light that he decided to sit down immediately. He was not going to be completely alone when he would break into that horrible place again, Gwen would be there. Not physically, obviously, and she was not the most comforting person, but Peter was just so relieved he would not be fully alone.
“Okay, that’s… that’s good,” Peter said, his head nodding along to what he was saying. He cleared his throat, suddenly embarrassed by how this news had affected him. “That will be useful. If I need help or something, you will be able to guide me with the plans and you will be able to confirm you got the files. That’s very smart.”
He looked at Gwen who was still standing and now had the earbuds in her hand. She was looking at him with an expression on her face that Peter could not recognise. Had he made things awkward? Probably, he was great at doing that. She raised her hand but then just brought it closer to her chest.
“My thoughts exactly.” She said, lowering her hand again.
She then walked to the other free chair, the one she had been sitting at before getting the earbuds. As Peter watched her do so, he noticed she still seemed strange. He was tempted to try to run out of her flat to avoid all of this awkwardness, but she still needed to help him with the mask. That and he had to change out of the suit.
“We can also use this the first few times you go be stupid and look for trouble. Like that, I can make sure you don’t do anything too idiotic and mess up our plan.”
God, that was an amazing idea. It was quite surprising that Gwen was offering to do this as she had been so against his idea of getting some real fighting experience, but he would be a fool to not take her up on her offer.
“That’s probably a good idea,” Peter replied, not wanting to sound too eager and seem like he needed Gwen to babysit him.
“Okay, we’ll do that then.” Gwen nodded and then stood up. “Let me show you how to deal with your mask.”
So she did, removing it and putting it back on for him. Peter then tried to do it a couple of times with Gwen making sure each time the mask was properly secured. They definitely did not want it to fall out or slip at the wrong time. Once Peter got the process fully down, he removed it one last time, figuring out it would be easier to change back into his normal clothes this way.
“That’s everything?” He asked Gwen, wanting to make sure they had not forgotten anything.
“That’s everything.” Gwen nodded as she put her serious face back on.
Peter stood up and took a deep breath.
“I guess I’m ready to be Spider-Man.”
Notes:
I put in an Iron Man 1 ref in the chapter, please do feel free to let me know if you got it!
As always, disclaimer with the science: it’s probably not 100% correct because I have not gotten into a rabbit hole of research papers about it, but hopefully it is not too outrageous wrong (do feel free to correct me/discuss it with me though if Van der Waals forces and that kind of stuff is your scientific jam).
Chapter 32: Tea and cuddles
Notes:
So, things are starting to get hectic for me and I’m about to become quite busy. I’ll do my best to stick to the posting schedule (meaning a new chapter posted every other Sunday), but I might end up being late by a few days sometimes or have to post a couple of days early. Yes, I have enough chapters already written to last me well until the new year, but I still need the mental bandwidth to proofread them and post them, which might be harder for me to have during December.
Things should come back to normal towards the middle of January, so this will only impact 3 chapters or so. I also want to let you guys know that I have made good progress on the story. I don’t want to say much as I don’t want to give too much information yet and I still figuring out some stuff, but I have started seeing the light at the end of the tunnel so to speak.
In the meantime, if you want to get some head-ups, I’m on Tumblr and Bluesky under the name Wadelock as well and I will try to use that to let you know of any change in the posting schedule.
Chapter Text
The night was cold, the coldest it had been yet, stinging Peter’s nose and ears and making him hurry back to his flat. He wished he brought his headphones along with him as they usually would protect his ears from the bitter cold. At least, he could protect his hands by shoving them in his pockets as he jogged all the way back to his flat. As he stepped into the building he lived in, Peter let himself enjoy the warmth again. He was definitely not made for cold weather, or maybe he was just not made for being outside at night during the winter. Whatever the case might be, he at least knew that he hated the cold. Peter entered the lift and started to try warming up his ears with his hands. They felt so cold that Peter started to get scared they might fall off. At what temperature and after staying how long outside did someone might get frostbite? Peter would probably look that up if he did not already have a million things on his mind. As soon as the lift’s door opened, Peter jumped out and hurried up to his flat. All he wanted was to slip into his warm bed and pass out. Too many things had happened tonight. Hey, at least he had gotten a cool suit, so that was something. Speaking of his suit, he was now really hoping that Gwen had taken Massachusetts’ cold weather into consideration as otherwise, Peter would freeze his butt off. He would have to ask her about that.
That was something he would have to do later, though, as Harry was apparently sitting on the floor with his head resting against Peter’s flat’s door. Peter felt his heart drop down to his stomach as his chest was back to trying to suffocate him. What had happened? Why was Harry here? Was something wrong? Was he hurt? Peter quickly rushed over to him to look at him better. Only when Peter was a few feet away Harry did Harry notice that someone was running towards him. It seemed like he had worse survival instincts than Peter. What a pair they made.
“Hi, Pete.” Harry quickly stood up, struggling a bit as he was holding a box. “I’m really sorry to show up like this unannounced, it’s just that…”
“Are you okay?” Peter cut him off.
He needed to know that Harry was, otherwise, he might lose his goddamn mind.
“I am, I am,” Harry quickly replied. “Sorry, I did not mean to frighten you. Urgh, of course, I would, what was I thinking?! Sorry, I’m being so pathetic, I should not have come bother you, I…”
Peter could see exactly what was happening in Harry’s brain: he was scared he had messed up and was now spiralling trying to fix it. Peter had done exactly that before. What had Harry done to stop his spiral? Right, he had interrupted and reassured him.
“It’s okay,” Peter quickly said. “You’re not bothering me.”
Trying to fully ground Harry, Peter gently placed a hand on his arm, mimicking what Gwen had done earlier in the evening. Those two actions seemed to work as Harry stopped talking and his shoulders noticeably dropped.
“What’s wrong?” Peter asked.
Harry sighed and looked away.
“I couldn’t sleep. It’s quite embarrassing, but I just couldn't. So, instead, I baked. It usually helps me whenever I need to relax or need comfort, but then, I had a cake and I definitely did not have the appetite for it. So, I figured you might want it?” Harry said, looking back to Peter as he said that last part.
As it had been previously demonstrated, Peter was not always the best at figuring out people’s feelings, especially when they were trying to hide them from him. However, Peter knew Harry had not just come over to give him some cake. There was something else, maybe the reason why he was so embarrassed about not being able to fall asleep. Peter was not going to comment about his suspicion, though. He did not want to make Harry feel ashamed when he was already so seemingly vulnerable. Peter hated it when people did that.
“I do,” Peter said instead, wrapping his hand around Harry’s arm without really realising it. “Thank you. Do you want to come inside?”
He felt Harry’s arm relax, but at the same time, Harry was looking down and had his free hand in his hair.
“Your parents told us we needed to stay at our own flat for the weekend.”
Right now, Peter could not give a flying fuck about what his parents had said. They were not there; they could not see how Harry was feeling, and they did not know what Harry needed as well as Peter did.
“I don’t care. You’re coming inside and having cake with me,” Peter stated, clearly not leaving it up for discussion.
“Pete…” Harry said, putting his hand on Peter’s shoulder.
“I said what I said.”
Peter unlocked the door and dragged Harry inside, who offered no resistance. Once inside, Peter removed his coat and threw it on his couch. He immediately regretted taking it off as he was still trying to warm up. That did not matter right now, what mattered was Harry. Thus, Peter turned to him. Harry was awkwardly standing in the middle of Peter’s living room, still holding the box in which the cake must be. Ever since that horrible phone call, Harry had seemed to have lost all the confidence that would usually radiate from him. Instead, he kept on looking like a lost child. It made Peter both incredibly sad and so very angry against Harry’s father. Peter took some time to think about what to do. He did not know what was bothering Harry tonight. He had, obviously, a general idea about what was wrong, as Harry was still dealing with the aftermath of being abandoned by his own father. Having been away from Peter all day for the first time in weeks must not have helped as well. However, Peter did not know what the issue was exactly. If Peter wanted to comfort Harry, he needed to find out what the problem was, what had happened to make Harry wait curled up on Peter’s doorstep. If Peter had to guess, it was probably due to why he was not able to fall asleep. Peter could help with that, he sure knew quite a lot about sleeping issues thanks to his father’s.
“I’m going to make chamomile tea to go with the cake. Do you want some?”
The last and only time Peter had made Harry tea, it had been chamomile. It had been that time Peter had come to Harry’s flat to figure out whether Harry was involved in the lab’s experiments and had instead ended up comforting him because of his father. It had also been as well the first time Peter had slept at Harry’s. The chamomile tea had seemed to do a good enough job at making Harry feel better, so maybe it could help him now relax enough to be able to fall asleep? And if it did not, it would at the very least bring Harry some comfort and help Peter warm up, which would be a win in Peter’s book.
“Sure.”
Harry put down his box on Peter’s coffee table and then let himself drop onto the couch. He did not seem as if he might run away while Peter had his back turned. Good. Peter rushed to make tea for his boyfriend and himself and came back with two nice hot cups of tea. Yep, this was definitely going to help Peter warm up a bit. He set them down and then grabbed a couple of plates and cutlery. Harry opened the box to reveal a chocolate cake that looked delicious. You could always count on Harry to somehow have the ingredients needed and be able to make delicious things even when distressed. Maybe Harry’s cooking was like Peter’s tinkering with robots. Peter paused at this comparison. It would make a lot of sense. It would make that second date Harry had planned suddenly feel even more special and somehow more intimate than anything else they had ever done. Well, now Peter hated Norman Osborn even more for interrupting it and ruining it.
“I’ll just have a tiny slice, I’m not really hungry,” Harry said, removing his shoes to put his feet on the couch, bringing his folded legs against his chest.
“When’s the last time you’ve eaten?”
Peter had learnt that taking care of Harry when he was upset was essentially like taking care of his father when he was in the middle of a project: you had to make sure he had slept, drank and eaten enough. Harry looked to the side, hiding his face against his knees.
“This morning.”
Eh, it could be worse. To be clear, it was definitely not good, but it could indeed be worse: at least Harry had eaten breakfast. Peter cut him a big slice of cake and gave it to him. Harry loved chocolate, so Peter was willing to bet that if he managed to get Harry to start eating it and then distract him from his worries, he would finish it. Peter might even manage to sneak a second slice past him. Peter then cut himself some cake and sat back on the couch. The tea was too hot for wrapping his hand around the mug, so he would have to wait. As soon as Peter’s back hit the couch’s cushion, Harry slid closer to him and put his head against Peter’s shoulder. This strangely reminded Peter yet again of that night and thus of the first time they had touched like this, with cups of tea cooling down and Harry needing comfort. There was a key difference though: now, Peter could touch and give all the support that Harry needed. Thus, Peter wrapped an arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder, making him snuggle even more. The warmth coming from Harry was just what Peter had needed. It made him want to snuggle in his arm to steal as much warmth as possible from him. It would not be very nice to Harry though.
“You’re cold,” Harry said, taking Peter’s hand.
Peter let him and even closed his eyes when Harry pressed both his hands against it, warming it up.
“I’m still not used to the weather.”
He was not sure he would ever be. He did not know if it had always been an issue for him, explaining why his family had always run away from New York as soon as it got too cold, or if it was somehow another fun gift he had gotten from that cursed spider.
“Why were you outside, then?”
Harry started rubbing his hand and Peter did his best to not tense up as Harry would feel it. Right, that question made sense and it was justified. Peter really did not want to lie to him, but that question left him no choice; he could not exactly tell him he was meeting Gwen to figure out how to stop the lab where Harry worked to make sure they would not hurt him, could he?
“I went on a walk, I could not sleep either,” Peter said, finding it strangely easy to lie.
Was he getting better at lying? Maybe the key was to be confident in what you were saying. Harry moved on to Peter’s other hand.
“Look at us, not being able to sleep without each other’s company.” Harry chuckled, but it sounded somewhat bittersweet. “I wonder what my father would think… or even your parents.”
Peter was so over worrying about what Harry’s deadbeat father might think, his opinion absolutely did not matter now. Peter was not sure it had ever mattered, actually. As for his own parents, Peter was already doing things they would not approve of such as planning a break-in and becoming a vigilante. Thus, them being annoyed that Peter would sleep better when he was sharing a bed with Harry was quite low on his list of worries. But still, he could not dismiss Harry’s feelings, that would not help.
“Don’t you think it’s cute?” Peter asked, trying to reframe the situation. “I thought you would.”
Harry moved, removing his head from Peter’s shoulder to instead look at him, in turn making Peter also look at him. God his eyes were, as always, quite something.
“Do you?”
Unfortunately, Peter could absolutely not tell if Harry was teasing or genuinely asking. Maybe it was both, maybe it was neither. In any case, Peter knew what he had to answer, it was just embarrassing. Why could this stuff come naturally to him, like it did for Harry? Peter forced himself to not look away and to instead keep on looking at Harry.
“I think it’s…”
Oh god, was he really going to say that? It was ridiculous for him to be embarrassed, they were a couple who had done intimate things, who had said they loved each other, so why did this feel so mortifying?
“adorable,” Peter finally said.
Harry’s lips stretched into a smile as he kept on staring at Peter. It was a small smile, but it was the first one Peter had seen on him in a while and it was absolutely beautiful. Harry was too, even on his bad days he looked so beautiful, beautiful enough to make Peter finally understand the stories of lovers who would do anything for each other. He would surely do anything for Harry.
“I think so too, then,” Harry said before leaning in to kiss Peter.
The kiss lingered, neither of them backing away to stop it. Harry’s lips felt rougher than usual, as if they were chapped. Was he drinking enough water? Peter should try to monitor that better, he did not want Harry to become dehydrated, that was not fun. They did not really move their lips against each other, neither of them felt the need to explore. Instead, their lips stayed pressed against each other, simply giving them a different way to touch, to connect, a more intimate one. That was probably what Harry needed, Peter’s warmth, feeling loved. No wonder he had not been able to fall asleep into an empty cold bed, stuck with his thoughts as only company. Peter would have probably not fallen asleep either. When Harry backed away, Peter let him. Peter was not sure how much time had passed, but he was hoping their kiss had managed to bring Harry some comfort. It had sure warmed up Peter, including his heart which he had not realised had been feeling cold until now.
“I love you,” Peter said, looking into Harry’s eyes.
He would rarely properly look into people’s eyes, Harry’s included, but whenever he looked into his boyfriend’s, Peter would always feel that breathless kind of sensation.
“I love you too,” Harry softly replied, his voice feeling like one of his hugs. “Come here.”
Harry shifted position, putting his back against the armrest, and wrapped his arms around Peter. Peter let him, resting his head against Harry’s chest as he put himself in between his legs. Usually, Peter would be the big spoon whenever they cuddled, as they both enjoyed it when Peter would hold Harry close, but this was a nice change. Harry’s arms were tightly wrapped around him, making him feel safe with the good kind of pressure against his chest, not the bad one. Harry was also warming him up even more efficiently, so that was a nice bonus. This felt like exactly what both he and Harry had needed. Peter placed a hand on one of Harry’s arms as holding onto something while relaxing would always make him feel better for some reason.
“You should really get some warmer clothes if you are to keep going on walks. I don’t want you to freeze to death,” Harry said, tightening his hold around Peter slightly.
Peter closed his eyes, enjoying being held like that, and thought. Harry knew of his habits of going on walks from last semester, so it was nothing new, it was nothing suspicious. It could probably become Peter’s official excuse whenever he needed to disappear. Like that, Harry would not worry and Peter would be able to do whatever he needed to, even when Harry was staying over.
“I will.”
As Harry kissed the top of his head, Peter could not help but wonder how long Harry had been waiting for him on his doorstep. Well, how much time had Peter spent with Gwen? At least an hour, probably more. Hopefully, Harry had not waited that long for him, all alone, curled up against his door. Peter fought the urge to shake his head, not being able to handle this image. At least, Harry had managed to get into the building instead of waiting inside. It was crazy how easy it was to get into residential buildings with a bit of luck and good timing. Not wanting to dwell on that, Peter opened his eyes again.
“Tea’s probably ready for us to drink,” Peter said, straightening up a bit.
Enough time must have passed for the tea to cool down enough, and even if it had not and the tea was still a bit too hot, Peter needed to get Harry to eat some of the cake before they both fell asleep. Harry let go of Peter, unwrapping his arms, and Peter sat back down properly on the couch. He carefully touched the side of one of the cups. The temperature seemed correct, so he handed it to Harry who took it. He watched him take a sip, confirming it was not too hot. Peter tasted some tea in his own cup. It was indeed just the right temperature. Peter then took a bite of the cake, using his fork, and let out a satisfied groan. It was simply delicious.
“It’s good?” Harry asked.
Peter vigorously nodded.
“It’s delicious,” Peter said once he had swallowed the cake. “As always.”
Harry smiled but looked down.
“You should have some,” Peter said.
“Pete, I told you, I’m not really hungry…”
“You still need to eat,” Peter pointed out. “And it’s really good, you would be missing out on a great cake.”
Harry sighed but put down his mug to take his plate and fork instead. Peter smiled. Success. As suspected, Harry’s face lit up after his first bite and soon enough, he was devouring the piece of cake. He seemed quite hungry, Peter wondered what his ‘breakfast’ had consisted of.
“I have some frozen pizza. Or we can order something,” Peter offered, really hoping Harry would accept one of those two options as he really needed to eat.
Luckily, Harry nodded as he kept on eating the cake. Peter assumed that he was saying yes to the pizza and ran to the kitchen to put it in the oven. It would take a bit over a quarter of an hour for the pizza to cook, but that was still quicker than ordering food. Hopefully, Harry could survive another twenty minutes before dying of hunger.
“Do you mind if I get some more cake?” Harry asked when Peter came back.
“Go ahead, one slice was enough for me,” Peter lied as he sat down again. “The pizza should not take too long. It’s pepperoni.”
“Your favourite,” Harry pointed out as he served himself a huge slice of cake. “It always makes you thirsty, though.”
It was indeed Peter’s favourite and it did make him drink a lot of water; he would not have thought Harry would have noticed or remembered. They had had pizza twice together: once in his flat where they had ordered a bunch of different pizzas and once during the Christmas break when, once again, there had been a variety of pizzas offered. Peter wondered what else Harry had noticed about him.
“The pepperonis always hurt my tongue a bit, so I need to drink water to keep eating,” Peter explained.
Peter’s diet usually consisted of the blandest food so yes, for him eating pepperonis could be painful. He was well aware of how ridiculous that sounded and it was something he was quite embarrassed and mad about. There were so many good foods he could not eat without wanting to cry. The universe was really cruel, was it not?
“I’m sorry,” Harry said between two bites.
“It’s okay.” Peter shrugged.
Harry looked clearly better than when Peter had found him on his doorstep. He was probably still sad, but his eyes looked less empty and his body seemed more alive. Eating was probably doing him a lot of good. Peter had been right to put a pizza in the oven as only eating cake would have caused Harry to have a sugar crash later on. Peter kept watching him eat, eating his own piece of cake as he drank his tea. Somehow, Harry managed to finish the cake before Peter’s timer for the pizza rang.
“I feel better. Thank you,” Harry said, putting down his plates.
Peter was really happy to hear that.
“You’re the one who made the cake.” Peter smiled.
“I know, but thank you for making me eat, yet again.”
“No worries.” Peter took Harry’s hand. Harry let him and kissed Peter’s cheek. “You should still eat some pizza, it will be ready soon.”
“Okay.” Harry nodded.
They sat in silence. Harry was playing with Peter’s hand. Peter enjoyed playing with things like that too, usually when he was nervous or was having trouble paying attention. Was Harry nervous about something? Should Peter ask him about it?
“I’m thinking of going back to work,” Harry said out of the blue. “It would do me some good. It would keep me busy.”
Peter tensed up, not able to help it. His heart had just dropped to his stomach. This is what he had feared, what he had tried to stop Harry from doing. Peter took a second to gather his thoughts. His mind was still raw from having to relive the events that had gotten him bitten by the spider, he needed to be careful or he would freak out again, he could feel it. He also needed to not look suspicious or weird or Harry would ask questions and might try to snoop around the lab like Peter had done. Why did Harry have to say this tonight? Why could he not wait for another time when Peter was not already emotionally drained?
“MIT’s not enough to keep you busy?” Peter asked, trying to sound normal.
Harry shrugged.
“It would also make me feel useful.”
“You’re useful,” Peter quickly said, feeling a sense of emergency. “You’re useful to me, and…”
The timer rang, making Peter jump a bit. The pizza was ready but they were in the middle of an important conversation. What should Peter do, stay and finish their important conversation but risk the pizza over-cooking, or go and get the pizza but maybe miss the chance to walk Harry down from getting back to work? Peter should probably take care of the pizza but he felt like his brain was stuck in a priority inversion. He was like that Pathfinder rover, unable to switch to that higher priority task which was to take the pizza out of the oven, and instead being stuck trying to process what Harry had said.
“I’ll get the pizza,” Harry said, standing up.
Peter snapped back to reality, his brain finally getting freed. He was not going to make Harry take care of the pizza, not when Peter was supposed to care for him, just because Peter’s brain sucked. He hurriedly put a hand on Harry’s arm, stopping him.
“No, it’s fine, I’ll get it.”
Taking a breather in the kitchen to try to process parts of what was on his mind would probably help Peter anyway. Thus, he stood up, and quickly made his way to the kitchen. As he took the pizza out of the oven, checking it was probably cooked, Peter forced himself to take deep breaths. Everything was going to be fine. Harry was thinking of going back, meaning Peter still had some time. He still had the time to do his vigilante work as they had literally just planned, and then to break in before Harry went back to work. Hell, maybe he could still convince him to not go back, it was not too late. Peter just needed to talk to him and plan accordingly. Everything was going to be fine, no need for Peter to freak out. Repeating this over and over in his head, Peter cut the pizza, put the slices on a plate, and then brought it back to Harry, grabbing some paper towels on the way.
“Be careful, it’s still hot,” Peter said as he put down the plate on the coffee table.
“Thank you, Prince Pete.”
This nickname still made Peter blush. He could not help it, it was simply too cute. Peter sat back down next to Harry, feeling a bit calmer now.
“You know, I would still have time for you,” Harry said, looking at the pizza and not at Peter. “And I’m just thinking about it, I don’t know yet. I’m not completely sure if they still want me now that… you know.”
Peter could understand why Harry would want to go back to working for the lab when he was unaware of what was really happening there. Peter’s heart also aches at the thought of Harry being scared he might not have value now that his father had cut him off. Peter could not completely criticize Harry’s desire to go back as it would only hurt Harry further, and Peter obviously did not want to do that. However, Peter could not encourage him either. Thus, all Peter could do was try to convince Harry to take some more time and hope he would be ready to do the break-in before Harry actually went back. Or, maybe, somehow, Harry would forget about this idea entirely if enough time passed, especially if Peter could manage to make him feel useful again. Yeah, that sounded like a good plan as well.
“I know.” Peter took a deep breath. “I know you would. I just don’t want you to rush going back instead of taking the time you need to deal with everything and recover.”
That sounded like a pretty reasonable thing to say and think, right? It seemed to be, as Harry looked at Peter again and thinly smiled at him. The smile seemed genuine, a bit sad, but sad in a different way than the other ones. Somehow, Peter had said the right thing. Harry wrapped an arm around Peter’s waist and pulled him closer to him. It felt a bit weird, but Peter let him and put his head against Harry’s shoulder, figuring out he needed to be comforted again. Harry kept his arm around him and started eating the pizza with his free hand. This felt like when they had danced together, back at the gala. It was one of the only times that, to Peter’s recollection, Harry had touched him in this way, as Peter would usually be the one wrapping his arms around Harry’s waist, with Harry wrapping his around Peter’s neck or shoulders. It was okay, Peter definitely preferred the way they would usually embrace each other, but it was not too bad. If this was making Harry feel better, so be it. Anything for Harry. Thus, Peter happily watched his boyfriend eating as he stole some of his body heat. Tonight had not been too bad after all.
Chapter 33: Dave sucks
Notes:
Content Warnings
Very very vague mentions of possible homophobia
Chapter Text
Harry ended up not only spending Saturday night at Peter’s place but also Sunday night. With classes starting on Monday, it made sense for Harry to stay at Peter’s the night before to minimise not only Harry’s stress but also Peter’s. They had, however, agreed that Harry would go back to his place on Monday evening so as to not tempt the devil, aka Peter’s parents. It felt unfair to call them that, as they were definitely not devils, far from it as they were being a godsend to Harry, but the saying did match pretty well the situation: the longer Harry would stay at Peter’s when he was supposed to be at his own flat, the more likely they would somehow find out. Hence, Harry would only spend those two nights at Peter’s, so his parents would be none the wiser. One side effect of that decision, which Peter had not accounted for, was how hard it made it to get out of bed on Monday morning. Harry had been right to set the alarm extra early; it had rang over fifteen minutes ago, but here they were, still in bed, cuddling.
“What if it doesn’t go well?” Harry asked.
He was in Peter’s arms, caressing Peter’s arm using his fingertips and giving Peter goosebumps as he was wearing a short-sleeved tee shirt.
“Why would it not go well?”
Peter did not really like first days in general, but that was due to all of the unknowns that came with them, but that was not something that seemed to usually bother Harry.
“You know…” Harry sighed, probably staring yet again at what the star projector was displaying on Peter’s bedroom wall. “With all the tabloids and publications, everyone must have heard about everything.”
Peter had not considered the possibility that their classmates might have read those shitty articles talking about Harry getting cut off as if this was nothing but juicy gossip. However, he still understood what Harry was implying with ‘everything’: people would not only know that Harry’s father had turned his back on his son, but also why he had done so. Everyone’s eyes might end up on them, like during the gala, but a hundred times worse. Would some students act in a bigoted way? Would some gossip? Would they use this as an excuse to hate either Harry or the Stark family? Peter was not necessarily worried about them being unsafe or hearing over-the-top hateful things; they were still at a university, after all, and those kinds of extreme things would put the perpetrators in some very hot water. However, more subtle things could still happen.
“Maybe people will be supportive and understanding?” Peter pointed out.
Universities tended to be more progressive places, ignoring those bible colleges. Harry had been abandoned by his own father, that would surely invoke sympathy from any decent human being.
“Or maybe they will not care at all,” Peter then said.
Being at MIT was exhausting enough, Peter would not be surprised if other students did not have the energy nor desire to follow celebrity gossip, especially when it was about the sons of wealthy people. He sure would not be following it if he were in their shoes.
“That would be nice…” Harry replied.
Harry did not sound at all convinced that things might not go terribly wrong, but Peter had a feeling he would not be able to fully change his mind on this. Thus, he should probably instead focus on making him feel supported.
“And I’ll be with you.” Peter softly kissed the back of Harry’s head, knowing Harry loved when he would do that. “You’re not getting rid of me so easily; you’re the only one who can survive watching Doctor Who with me.”
“Have a lot of guys tried to?”
The sassiness in Harry’s voice flooded Peter with relief. Harry might not be doing fine, but he was somewhat okay enough to flirt using smartarse remarks. That was a good sign, and Peter loved to hear it, even if it always made me blush.
“A ton,” Peter forced himself to reply, trying to keep up the energy he had somehow created. “They all tell me how they’d love to watch Doctor Who with me and then run away barely ten minutes into an episode.”
“Not me, though.”
This thought knocked Peter’s breath out of his stomach and made his heart feel very weird. Harry had indeed never run away from Peter, despite how weird he had acted, how much he had talked, or how much he had been unable to speak. Through all of that, Harry had stayed with him.
“Not you, though.”
Not resisting the urge, his chest begging him to as if it would explode if Peter did not do it, Peter tightened his hold on Harry. Harry let him, still caressing his arm, and Peter felt him take a deep breath. Peter always had to be careful with his strength, be mindful of it and use it appropriately, and so far he had never slipped up. Well, except that one time when he had been forced to carry Harry up the stairs, but Harry had never brought it up, and neither had Peter. All in all, it was lucky that Harry also liked tight hugs, as they were Peter’s favourites.
“I love you, Darling,” Peter whispered.
The words had rolled out of his tongue so naturally and seamlessly Peter might have thought them instead of speaking them. Harry stopped caressing his arm, holding onto it instead. His hold was firm but not strong enough to actually hurt Peter.
“I love you too, Prince Pete.”
Peter smiled. He was starting to grow so attached to that nickname as it would always remind him of their first date and how happy Harry had been. This was probably his most precious memory, or at least the most precious one he shared with Harry. They lay like this for a few more minutes until their alarm ran again. They had already snoozed it multiple times, so it would probably not be a good idea to snooze it again.
“We should get up,” Peter said.
Harry did not move but again tightened his hold on Peter’s arm. It seemed like Peter had still not managed to convince Harry to get out of bed.
“Harry…” He sighed.
Peter was not sure what else to do. They had talked through Harry’s worries, Peter had given him plenty of physical contact, he had told him he loved him, and even used his nickname. Peter had used all of his tricks to make him feel better. Well, Peter could just get out of bed and hope Harry would follow him, but that seemed harsh.
“I know, I just…” Harry started rubbing Peter’s arm slightly with his thumb. “I just need to find some motivation to get out of bed. I keep thinking of how awful it’s going to be, so I’m left with no will to actually get up.”
Harry was articulating his feelings exceptionally well. Peter could not help but be surprised and a tad envious. He could never put his feelings so clearly, at least not without having had a few days to process them, and he was even less capable of speaking them with such certainty. He was getting better at communicating them, however, thanks to Harry, so maybe one day he would be able to.
“So you just need something to motivate you to actually get out of bed?” Peter summed up, trying to process what his boyfriend had said. “Like a reward?”
For some reason, Harry hid his face against Peter’s arm.
“It sounds silly when you say it like that, but yes.”
Peter thought about it. He could not offer good food to Harry, as he was a terrible cook and had neither the time nor the ingredients. He could also not give him a gift, as he had nothing to gift him. So what was else could he do? What else did Harry like? Harry liked spending time with Peter, but they were already doing that, same with cuddling. Peter could offer him a kiss as a reward for if he got out of bed, but he had already given him some of those this morning. So, what else was left?
“If you get out of bed…” Peter started to say, trying to force his brain into having an idea.
Well, there was something that Harry definitely enjoyed, that would not make them lose time, and that he did not get to do that often, even now. Peter’s dignity was going to take a hit, though.
“You’ll get to see me, bare chest,” Peter forced out, trying to ignore the fact he was bribing his boyfriend with nudity. “Deal?”
Harry’s head perked up, his face not hiding anymore against Peter’s arm.
“You sneaky man…” Harry mumbled before speaking more clearly. “Deal.”
Peter was not sure whether he should be flattered or disturbed that had worked, but knew better than to think too much about it right now. All that mattered was that it had worked. Before Peter had the time to say or do anything else, Harry was getting out of bed, and Peter hurried to do the same.
By some miracle, they shared their first class of the week and, thus, of the semester. Peter would have been ready to skip his class to accompany Harry to his, but that would have probably caused more drama and would have meant starting his second semester already behind, which was something Peter would rather avoid. This might have been a somewhat small win, but it was still one, and Peter was not going to be picky when it came to them. Walking to class was still, of course, nerve-wracking. Peter had no idea how to act, if he should be holding Harry’s hand or pretending they were still just friends. He had tried to glance at Harry as they had walked to try to gauge what to do, but it had only left him even more confused. Harry was standing weirdly straight, looking quite rigid. On his face, however, he was displaying a smile. It was a rather small one, but it exuded confidence. It did not make sense as Harry was probably still a nervous wreck. The tension in Harry’s jaw and how he was carrying himself so rigidly confirmed it. Peter had learnt to observe Harry, to try to read him better by noticing how his face would slightly change and trying to catalogue all of his tell signs. Right now, Peter’s gut was telling him that Harry’s face right now was not what he was actually feeling. So why was Harry making that face? Was it a façade? Was it like when people would tell you to not act or look scared in front of certain animals? Maybe it was, and maybe Peter should imitate Harry. Unfortunately, Peter was nowhere near as good as Harry when it came to hiding his feelings.
Harry did not pause when they entered the room; he just walked in with that same smile on, as if he had not struggled to even get out of bed just an hour ago or so. Peter rushed behind him, not fancying being left behind all alone. Harry kept walking, moving towards the front row where they usually sat. It seemed like they were not going to hide in the back row as Peter had deep inside hoped. Instead, they were going to act as if nothing had happened. It was a good plan, Peter had to admit it, he would just have preferred that Harry had let him know about it before they had to strut in front of everyone. Indeed, as they had gotten out of bed later than expected, they were now anything but the first students to arrive. Luckily, though, two places were still left in the front row.
As Peter sat down at the end of the row and set his bag on the floor, he looked around to see awkward looks from everyone in the room. Well, not literally everyone, of course, but a few people were staring at them, and some of them were whispering to each other. Lovely, they had seen the magazines. Harry seemed unbothered, though, as if he had not noticed and was simply taking his things out of his bag. Peter decided to imitate him and took his laptop out of his bag. Peter was trying hard to look as unbothered as Harry did, but the feeling of being observed was quite unnerving. He could not help but worry about every single movement he made. He had no idea how to act normal as he had never figured that one out. He had tried so hard when he had been to that school, but it had been a massive failure. He was a massive failure and he was going to embarrass Harry. Maybe he should have let Harry go to class alone as he clearly knew how to handle himself. How could Peter have thought his presence might be helpful? After all, all of this was his fault: if he had not invited Harry to be his date at the gala, none of this would have happened. Maybe Harry would be better off without him, maybe…
“Breathe.”
Harry had put his hand on Peter’s, on the table and thus in full view of everyone. Peter stared at it before realising he had stopped breathing. That was not good. He took Harry’s hand, and let out a long sigh as he felt relief wash over him. Harry was not embarrassed of him, Harry understood, because of course he would. Squeezing Peter’s hand as he did so, Harry started to take deep breaths. Peter followed his lead, focusing on the squeezes Harry was giving him. It was actually quite helpful.
“Better?” He quietly asked.
Peter nodded. It was much better. Harry’s smile became genuine. Peter was so lucky to have him, to have someone who understood him so well. Peter might have been the one reassuring Harry this morning, convincing him to get out of bed, but now, he would absolutely fall apart without Harry.
The bubble that Peter had started to build around himself and Harry suddenly burst when he saw who was standing behind the lecturer’s desk. It was that old lecturer they also had during the first semester who just loved burying them under a ton of useless work. With everything that had happened, Peter had forgotten to check out who was teaching them this semester. Peter felt his heart sink further down when he locked eyes with the man. He tried to not hold his breath, not wanting to worry Harry again, but it was hard. The lecturer’s eyes wandered down, towards where Peter’s and Harry’s joined hands were laying, before returning to Peter’s eyes. Fearing what was to come from such an old guy, Peter braced himself for the worst. He knew it would not be anything too bad, but even a snide remark could have a devasting effect on him right now with all the nerves he had going on. No such bad response came. Instead, the man slightly tilted his head forward before putting it back to its normal position and then went back to setting his own things down. That had not been the reaction Peter had expected from him. He was not sure what it meant, but it felt positive, right? At the very least it did not make him feel bad, so it must mean it had been a good response.
The class went on as usual. After a while, the other students stopped staring as they got too busy focusing on what they were being taught. Being around so many people who kept moving around was still quite distracting for Peter, but he had survived Disneyland, he could survive this. At the end of the class, Harry had to rush away, his second class being further away than where Peter had his. Not feeling up to walking through all the students to get out of the room, Peter decided to pack his things extra slowly. He ended up apparently being so slow that soon enough, it was only him and the lecturer left in the room. Peter was about to walk to the door, having a class to go to after all, when the lecturer spoke up.
“Mr. Stark.”
Peter quickly turned his head towards the lecturer. The guy actually knew his name. Peter had participated quite a lot in his class during the previous semester, but he had so many students, and they had never talked outside of class. Thus, Peter had not expected the lecturer to actually know his name. But he did. Peter should know better by now; it was not surprising when he was the son of a very famous alumni. The question was less about how the man knew his name, but more about what he wanted.
“Yes, Doctor?” Peter asked, trying to hide his nervousness.
Had Peter misread his earlier reaction? Was he going to reprimand him about something? Or was he going to ask something about Stark Industries? The possibilities were endless. The man straightened up while displaying his usual stern look on his face. If Peter was asked to describe the stereotype of the ‘old, grumpy and scary lecturer’, he would simply point to that man.
“If any of your fellow students give you any problem, you come to me, understood?” He said, looking straight into Peter’s eyes.
This was clearly not a suggestion or an offer, but an order. For once, Peter did not have to wonder what the man had meant by ‘problem’, he had gotten the message loud and clear.
“Yes, Doctor.”
Peter looked at the man a bit longer, realising he had apparently somewhat misjudged him. Peter thought he was some sort of sadist, enjoying making his student suffer, but here he was, offering support to Peter if he needed to. Peter could have wondered why, when the man was usually so cold and stern, was he now doing this, but Peter did not want to wonder. All he wanted was to know that he had a member of staff he could turn to if people decided to give Harry or him a hard time. There was Doctor Otto, too, but they did not have him for any of their classes this semester, Peter was pretty sure. So he would take this act of kindness and be grateful.
“Good,” the man said in his usual emotionless voice before walking towards the door.
“Thank you,” Peter quickly said, loud enough for his lecturer to hear despite having started to walk away.
The man did not react, but Peter did not think he would. So, Peter just watched him leave the room. Peter stared at the door he had disappeared through, trying to fully process their exchange, but soon enough, people were walking through it. Peter quickly snapped back to reality and rushed to his own class.
As Peter left his third and final class of the day, he sighed in relief. That first day had not been too bad after all. Yes, having everyone looking at them had nearly made Peter freak out, but Harry had been here to reassure him. He also had to suffer through a class without Harry, but most of the people in that class were the same as in the previous one, with the only difference being that people doing double major degrees were missing. Thus, there were again some stares, but much less of them and basically no weird whispering. Then, finally, for his third class, he had been able to run back to Harry, who still had his mask of perfect confidence on, making the class feel like a piece of cake to go through. Despite nothing horrible happening to them, Peter felt completely emotionally exhausted and could not wait to go back to his flat and just lie on his couch until he felt like a human again. The only thing stopping Peter from running home was that Harry was going to go back to his own flat, meaning they would not see each other until their next shared class tomorrow. Thus, instead, Peter slowly walked with him through campus towards where both of their buildings were.
“You’re sure you’re going to be okay?” Peter asked.
He did not want to doubt Harry’s strength, that man had so much of it, but Harry had showed back up at his front door the first night he had been supposed to be alone. Peter did not want him to suffer alone like that again.
“I’ll be okay.” Harry nodded. “Today has not been as bad as I thought, and it’s one less thing to stress out over.”
Harry was no longer wearing his fake confident face, and had a more neutral one on. He also did not seem as tensed as he had been. Peter believed him and that getting through today had removed a big weight off his shoulders, but now, Peter suddenly felt anxious at the idea of going back to living in his flat alone. Was that weird? Was that unhealthy and messed up? He had gotten so used to having Harry around, it felt like such a big change. When Harry had left the first time, he had been so focused on his meeting with Gwen that he had not had the time nor brainpower to process it. He was supposed to go into town next week-end to do some vigilante work for the first time, so maybe that would keep his mind occupied again. Indeed, Peter still had things to prepare for that, like how to get to and back from the neighbourhood Gwen had selected. He should also put a camera or sensor at his door so he could be alerted if Harry needed comfort again and was looking for him. This would serve two purposes: to ensure he would not have to stumble onto that heartbreaking scene again and to avoid Harry starting to suspect Peter was not simply going on walks.
“We can still grab food at some point or study together,” Peter offered, not liking the idea of only seeing Harry during classes.
“Of course,” Harry smiled. “You’re still my prince, Pete, and you’re not getting rid of me so easily.”
Harry took Peter’s hand and gently pulled Peter towards him. Instinctively, Peter spun around to face Harry, only for Harry to put a hand on his waist. Peter’s face felt like it had reached its boiling point, and it felt like someone was sitting on his ribcage yet again. This was way too much physical affection to be displayed in public for Peter to handle. He had gotten used to it at the Stark villa and in his flat, but out here, in the middle of campus, it made him feel like he was going to be stabbed by a thousand eyes.
“Harry! Long time no see,” A voice called out, making Harry soften his hold on both Peter’s hand and waist.
Peter used this opportunity to quickly step to the side and try to catch his breath. He felt like he had just run a marathon. Could he run a marathon now? Should he try? No, he already had too much going on, and that would probably be the most suspicious thing he could ever do. As his heart was still beating too fast, Peter could not help but quickly look around. Nobody was staring at them, well, except for that guy standing in front of them. He looked older than them, more around Gwen’s age, but Peter was pretty bad at telling people’s ages. He was nicely dressed, not in a fancy way, but in a somewhat professional way. He had a classic coat on, but his trousers and shoes looked like something that old lecturer would wear. Was Peter being mean by thinking that? He had not meant to.
“Dave, it’s been a while, yes.”
Harry was smiling, and it looked natural. He was actually happy to see Dave, so who the hell was Dave? It was not that Peter was not happy to see Harry happy meeting someone, quite on the contrary, especially when that Dave guy had let Peter avoid having to tell Harry he was making him uncomfortable, but Peter was cranky, and he just wanted to go home, not socialise. Would it be rude if he tried to simply disappear by keeping on stepping to the side while they were talking?
“This is Peter,” Harry said, ruining Peter’s plan to discretely get away from the conversation. “My boyfriend.”
Well, that was surely a lovely thing to hear Harry say. Peter had to fight a smile, not sure it would be weird if he smiled like an idiot right now.
“And this is Dave,” Harry turned to Peter. “He works at the research centre where I’ve been working. He’s a post-grad student, he’s doing his PhD.”
Suddenly, Peter did not feel like smiling anymore. His stomach had become a black hole which was threatening to spaghettify the rest of his body.
“It’s nice to meet you, Peter. You’ve got a very smart boyfriend,” Dave said, smiling.
Peter forced a smile, swallowing his urge to grab Harry’s hand and run away.
“Nice to meet you too,” He said instead. “I know, Harry’s incredible.”
He had nearly wanted to scream that no, Harry was not smart, even though he absolutely was, and thus they should just leave him alone, but he knew that would definitely not go over well.
“We’ve been missing you. Your input was always so useful,” Dave said as he looked back to Harry.
“Thank you, it means a lot,” Harry replied.
“We’d love to have you around again now that you’re back on campus.”
“I…” Harry glanced at Peter and must have noticed something was up as he took Peter’s hand again, squeezing it firmly. “I appreciate it, but I’m taking some time for myself. Maybe later on during the semester?”
Peter wanted to jump onto Harry and kiss him until the lack of oxygen caused both of them to pass out. It was official, Harry was not going back just yet. He was still going to go back at some point, Peter knew that deep down now, but Harry was leaving him some time to prepare. Peter loved him so much.
“Of course, you need to take care of yourself first.” Dave nodded. “I just wanted to make sure you knew that… what has happened hasn’t changed anything when it comes to your role within our research.”
Was it bad that Peter wished it had? That the lab would have decided that Harry was useless now that he no longer had his father’s backing? That this horrible situation would somehow turn into something good? Maybe it was. Maybe Peter was a bad person for wishing that, but there was nothing he would not wish for if it meant Harry was safe.
“I appreciate it, thank you.”
No, Harry should not appreciate it, he should run away from them! Dave nodded as Peter held in all of his protests.
“I’ll let you two be. I hope I see you around at some point, Harry, even if it’s just to say hi.” Dave smiled as he patted Harry’s shoulder.
“Sure, see you, Dave,” Harry replied, returning Dave’s smile.
Peter watched Dave walk away, wondering if he was going to the lab. Harry might have said he was planning to return to working at the lab just yet, but Peter now knew it was inevitable. He had to be ready before that happened. Peter had to kick butts this week-end with his first ‘vigilante session’ no matter what.
“Let’s get going again,” Peter said, eager to train at his flat to ensure his success.
He had work to do.
Chapter 34: What's up Danger
Notes:
Hi, sorry for the late chapter, I’ve been busy and had to wait for my brain to be able to proofread stuff somewhat correctly. You can expect the next chapter to be somewhat late as well. I should be able to get back to my usual routine after that.
Disclaimer for this chapter: I do not know the area this chapter is set in and I’ve never been in a proper fight (I was kind of a feral kid but that doesn’t really help me here).Content Warnings
Somewhat minor injuries (considering Peter’s abilities)
More swearing than usualMentioned of possible attempted assault
From “So far so good on that front, at least.” to “I did not hear any fighting.”
Chapter Text
Yep, Peter was actually going to do it. Crazy, right? Standing in some random alley while wearing his way too tight for comfort suit, Peter took a few instants to convince himself this was real. Part of him still wanted to quickly grab his clothes and chicken out, screaming that all of this was utterly ridiculous. Peter could not do that, though. He had to get himself ready as quickly as possible to stop the lab before Harry would actually go back to working there. Thus, not wanting to waste any more time and risk changing his mind, Peter started climbing the side of a building. It was surprisingly easy as the suit was really working well, and it would give him a better vantage point to see what was happening around him. When he reached the top, Peter awkwardly lifted himself onto the roof and started looking around. Nothing was particularly standing out. People were walking, and some others were talking, looking like they were on their way from or to a party, but nothing that looked like a situation where a vigilante would intervene. Peter should be glad not to see any criminal activity yet. Yes, he was half an hour or so away from MIT, but this was still the town he was living in. However, he could not help but worry. What if he was not going to stumble onto anyone needing help or any crime that needed to be stopped? He would look pretty stupid if that happened. Peter shook his head. It was still very early in the night, he had barely gotten started, he should not be freaking out yet. He should get used to moving around instead. The buildings were not very tall, which was both an advantage and a disadvantage. On one hand, it would hurt less if he happened to fall off a building, which was some pretty good news. On the other hand, he could not swing from building to building like he had tried to do with that tree forever ago when he was still discovering his powers. So, how was he going to get around? He could not keep getting down and climbing buildings, as that would look way too suspicious, and so would walking around in the street. What he could try to do, however, was to jump from building to building. They were not too far apart, and super strength should mean he could make bigger jumps, right? He could push himself harder with his feet and thus make himself go further. That would make sense.
Deciding to test that theory out, Peter placed himself in one of the corners of the roof. He then took a deep breath, as he would always do to calm his nerves, and started running. After a few steps, he pushed himself off the ground hard. All of a sudden, he felt like he was flying. Oh god, what had he done?! His body was flying through the air, and he did not know how to stop it; he had not expected he would be able to jump that far. The end of the roof was approaching fast. He was going to fall out of the building! He really should have picked a bigger roof. Not being able to focus because of the air being so loud and hitting his face through the mask, Peter let his instincts take over. Thanks fuck, they were actually good now, making him extend his right arm back towards the building and shooting a web. His body changed direction, being pulled backwards before crashing into a wall. Peter let out a groan full of pain as he hung from his web. His back was once again not going to be happy. At least he had not hurt himself too bad; crashing into the wall like that was probably nowhere near as painful as actually falling off the building would have been. Peter looked down, wanting to see what he had managed to avoid, and felt quite silly quite quickly. He was only like, what? Two stories up? Three max? Enough to hurt, but it would not have been too bad considering Peter’s body’s newfound resistance. It definitely had not warrant the panic he had just felt.
“Sorry, I was getting my food. Has anything happened yet?”
That was Gwen, talking through the comm system she had put in Peter’s suit. Peter was currently really glad she had not put some kind of video camera in it as well, as she would otherwise have definitely teased him for jumping off a building by accident and freaking out about it.
“No. I was…” Peter searched for the right way to spin this around. “…just getting used to the surroundings and looking around. Hanging out, you know.”
He was technically hanging out, just hanging from a building like the idiot he was. He should probably climb back up before someone noticed him.
“Okay, let me know when you spot something interesting then,” Gwen replied. “Don’t take too long, though. I would like to preserve my sleep schedule as much as possible, if you don’t mind.”
“Sure…”
It was easy for her to say, it was not as if Peter could sense crimes happening streets away. Yes, he could somewhat sense dangers coming his way with his weird tingles, but it was not that good. Thus, he would have to keep his eyes open and rely at least partly on luck. Peter climbed back onto the building’s roof and looked around him again. There was still nothing interesting happening, but at least now he had found a way to get from one roof to another without having to go down, so that was progress, right? Peter picked a roof next to his where the gap between buildings was not too big, backed up all the way on the roof and started running. Once near the ledge, he jumped, trying to control the force he used to push himself off the ground better. The air around him again felt disorienting as it hit his face and became louder. Peter fought it, focusing on his landing target. As Peter quickly approached the new roof, having apparently put the right amount of force in his jump, he realised he did not know how to land. He could not land with his legs extended straight, that would make them more likely to get injured from the shock. So, he needed to bend them, but what about his feet? Should he land with his feet flat? Well, it would make his landing much more stable, so he probably should. Peter hit the ground hard, feeling the impact going through his body. Bending his knees had clearly been a good idea, but how his heels had hit the ground had not felt good. He should probably try to land more towards the end of his feet next time. He also had to wave his arms around and then actually put his hand on the floor to stop himself from falling over, his momentum having pushed him forward. The landing had been unpleasant, but at least he had not hurt himself.
Peter decided to try again, jumping onto the next roof. Landing more onto the forefront of the foot definitely made the landing feel less brutal. Peter still had the problem of the forward momentum to deal with. What if, instead of trying to stop it, he used it? He would not have to fight its force, which required him to apply some force of its own, and he could use it as either momentum to go to the next roof or to decelerate in a slower but smother way. Yeah, that was probably the obvious smart thing to do. Thus, Peter tried it. Instead of landing with both feet at the same place, he landed onto one of his feet and then let the momentum push him forward, putting down his other feet further. He still nearly fell on his butt, but this was the way to go. It made the landing feel much smoother. He just needed to find a way to stabilise himself a bit more using his hands, so he tried a fourth time, using his hands to propel himself forward and upward. As he took a few steps after landing, getting back up as he walked, Peter decided this was absolutely how he should be landing from now on. He was proud of himself, he usually sucked at this kind of thing, but here he was, having figured this out. Too bad nobody was there to see it. Oh well, Peter had other things to do other than show off anyway.
He kept jumping from building to building, now taking the time to look around him, still looking for his chance to intervene. After a while of not finding anything, Peter decided to sit down for a bit, kicking his feet in the air as he sat on a building edge above a dark alley. Had he picked the wrong part of town? Gwen had told him this was where he had the most chances to walk onto someone needing help, but maybe she had been wrong. Or, maybe, she had done this on purpose? She had been against this whole idea, so maybe she had planned for Peter to try to look for trouble and fail. That would be a dick move on her part, but kind of smart, Peter had to admit. Still, he would be very annoyed. Should he ask her about it? Peter would not confront her. Instead, he could ask more as if he was wondering why he still had not found anything interesting. Would she say something, or would she let him waste his entire night? If so, it was a good thing they had picked a weekend, and Harry had finally managed to go back to sleeping alone. He had been doing so for the last few days after another week of them sleeping together, and Peter had added a sensor in front of his flat’s door to let him know if Harry did show up unannounced again. So far so good on that front, at least.
“I mean it, Derek, leave me alone!”
Peter jumped to his feet and looked down. Two men had appeared in the alley. One was walking ahead of the other, rushing. The other guy who was following the first one was probably Derek. Clearly, the guy wanted Derek to stop following him, and Derek had other plans, but Peter was not sure whether or not he should intervene. They may have been friends having a silly argument. Or boyfriends, even. It would be pretty awkward for Peter to jump down from his building and be greeted by two ‘wtf’ faces.
“Get off of me!”
Derek had managed to catch up to the guy and had apparently grabbed him or something, it was hard to tell from this distance.
“I said get off!”
As soon as Peter saw Derek pinning the other guy to a wall, Peter knew he should indeed intervene, but realised he had no idea how to get down quickly. Should he simply jump off? The roof was not that high.
“No!” The guy screamed.
Peter did not have time to think about it; he had to act now. Thus, he jumped from the building. The landing hurt like a bitch, Peter nearly twisting his ankle and ending up rolling forward as he did not manage to stop himself with his hands. Jesus fucking Christ, he really needed to learn how to get down from a building without nearly shattering his body.
“What…” A new voice said.
Right, Peter would have to complain about his pain later. Still crouched, Peter shot a web towards Derek and pulled the web back. Derek flew backwards and thus towards Peter, finally getting off the guy like he had asked multiple times. That was the first step done, now what? Peter hurriedly stood back up and started shooting more webs at him, trying to pin him down on the floor. Soon enough, the guy was covered in webs. He seemed to try to move, to get free, but Peter’s webs were not budging. Good, that worked.
“Who the fuck are you, you fucking assho…”
“He told you to leave him alone!” Peter interrupted. “What part of his request did you not understand? Did you struggle with a fucking word? Do you need a dictionary or something?”
“Fuck you!”
Peter thought the urge to snap back that, unlike the guy, someone did want to fuck him or to get a dictionary just to hit the guy in the head with it a few times to get the message through fully. Instead, he took a deep breath, trying to calm down from the adrenaline that was coursing through him. The ‘fight’ might not have lasted long, and had not been really a fight, but it had done a number on him.
“Excuse me?” Someone said in Peter’s back.
Peter turned around to see the guy who had been attacked by Derek, making him snap out of it.
“Hi, sorry, yes, hi,” Peter quickly said. “Are you okay? Are you hurt?”
The guy seemed just a bit older than Peter, as Derek did. It made Peter feel weird for some reason. He seemed, of course, somewhat scared, but Peter could not tell if it was only because of what Derek had done or also because of Peter.
“I’m okay, and thanks for…” The man gestured to Derek. He then looked at Peter for a few seconds, making him a bit uncomfortable. “But can I go?”
He was not sure why the guy was asking him permission; it was not as if he was also going to pin him to the floor with webs just because he was there, but he was happy to give it.
“Yeah, of course! I…”
The man booked it out of the alley before Peter could finish his sentence. That was fair; Peter would have probably done the same thing.
“Untie me, you dickhead!”
Spinning quickly back towards Derek, Peter shot a web and was surprised to see it hit his mouth. It seemed like Peter’s instincts were better than he had thought them to be, even if he had known they had improved a lot since the spider’s bite.
“No,” Peter said, crossing his arms.
He was definitely not going to untie him, but what was he going to do with him? Peter had not planned for that. He could not call the cops to come pick him up as they would just see a random guy stuck and unstuck him, which Peter did not want. Derek absolutely deserved to stay here until Peter’s webs let out. The only option that came to Peter’s mind was to just leave him here, which would hopefully teach him some kind of lesson.
“You can stay here the entire night and never, ever contact him, or I will hit you in the head with a dictionary until you finally get the message, understood?”
Derek could not properly answer, as his mouth was covered by Peter’s web, and so only made angry noises. Eh, Peter would take it. However, Peter was pretty sure his web would not be able to hold him down the entire night. Derek did not need to do that, though. It was more fun to let him think it would.
“Great talk,” Peter said.
Peter shot Derek one last glance before looking away and taking a deep breath. It was time to go and leave him behind. Peter shot a web towards the top of the building he had jumped from. He did not want to climb it up, looking like an idiot like he usually would in front of Derek. Maybe he could yank himself to the wall using his web. That would look much cooler. Peter shot another web from his other wrist and grabbed both of them in his hands. He then took a few steps back before running forward and pulling hard. He flew once again through the air. He was doing a lot more ‘flying’ than he thought he would do today. Fortunately, Peter had started to get used to this sensation and to the air hitting him, letting him stop himself and grip the wall instead of crashing into it. Peter took an instant to admire Gwen’s work as the suit stuck perfectly to the wall before finishing to climb onto the roof. Once there, he let himself fall onto the floor, lying down and sighing.
“I assume that you just had your first encounter?” Gwen asked in Peter’s ear.
He had forgotten he was on a call with Gwen as they had not talked since Peter had nearly fallen off a building. He probably should have let her know he had found a situation and was going to intervene, but it had completely slipped his mind. Oh well, it seemed like she had figured it out on her own, and Peter was now really glad he had not snapped back at Derek’s ‘fuck you’ comment. That would have been a big yikes.
“Yes, some guy was harassing another guy, so I stepped in before he got too far,” Peter explained.
Derek had done a bit more than ‘harassing’ someone, and he might have done a lot more than ‘harassing’ someone if Peter had not stepped in, but he did not have the energy or words to get into that with Gwen.
“I did not hear any fighting.”
“We did not, I…”
How was Peter going to describe what he had done? He had ‘webbed’ the guy? ‘Covered him in web’? That sounded weird, but it was accurate.
“I shoot a web to pull him off from the guy and then stuck him to the ground with some more webs.”
“You managed to neutralise him without even having to fight him? That’s really good, Peter.”
Gwen sounded surprisingly genuine and as if she was proud of Peter. Was she? Would it be weird if she was? In any case, it felt nice to hear it, so Peter would take it without asking questions and possibly ruining it.
“Thanks.”
She had a point as well: if Peter could manage to neutralise people who might want to stop or hurt him during the lab break-in instead of having to fight them, he would be much safer, and it would be much less messy, and thus a big win. What he had just done was indeed very good. However, he still needed some more experience. He might have been lucky, and he had had the element of surprise against one unarmed person. He should not start going around with unwarranted confidence. No, what he should do is keep training, so that was what he was going to do. He started once again going from roof to roof, looking for someone else in trouble. It took a while, as it had the first time, but Peter kept jumping from building to building instead of sitting down. It felt strangely freeing moving around like this, hidden in the dark and not having to dodge people or cars. Peter was also quite enjoying his new endurance, never having run so much before. He would have probably ended up on the floor, wheezing, if he had tried to. As he was about to jump onto the next building, something caught Peter’s eyes. There were people in a dark alley. From what Peter knew, bad things happened more often than not in dark alleys, so maybe this would be his next opportunity to jump in. He got closer to the building’s edge to see what was happening.
“I think I see something,” Peter said to Gwen, remembering to tell her this time. “There’s two guys cornering a third, or something.”
“Do you think he needs help? Are they armed?”
Peter tried to look for a weapon and signs of danger, but it was hard to see from the rooftop.
“Maybe. I don’t see any weapons, though.”
“You can try to intervene, but be careful, okay?”
Being careful would mean not jumping into possible danger, but Peter understood what she meant: don’t be extra stupid. Thus, to honour the request and because the situation seemed to leave him the time to do so, Peter decided to find a way to get down from the roof that did not involve landing directly on his feet. The next building was not too far, maybe he could break his fall by jumping from wall to wall. That seemed like a good plan. Peter jumped, aiming for the wall opposite him, just a bit lower than the roof. As he reached it, he stuck to it using his hands and feet before jumping to the wall of the building he had been standing on, just lower. He did that multiple times, being able to control his descent and be surprisingly quick as he did so. Peter finally reached the ground and turned to the two men who had seemed threatening. He looked past them to the man stuck between them and a wall. He put his hands on his hips, trying to look serious and intimidating, but he knew that with his skin-tight suit, he probably looked like a weirdo.
“Everything’s okay?” Peter asked.
The three men looked at him, looking him up and down. Peter had not expected this reaction exactly, but it made sense. What made less sense was the two threatening guys turning to the third guy and one of them asking him:
“You know this guy?”
The cornered man quickly shook his head and put his hands slightly up.
“He’s not with me, I swear!”
The scene had kind of looked like a mugging, but the three men now seemed to know each other. Had Peter misread the situation? Had they not planned to do anything bad?
“Then why is he here asking you if you’re okay?!” One of the two men asked loudly before grabbing the third one by his jacket and slamming him into a wall. “Did you think you could pay some kind of freak to get you off the hook by threatening me instead of paying me back my goddamn money?! Did you really think that would work on me?! I eat those freaks for breakfast.”
Okay, Peter had actually read the situation somewhat correctly, he had just been confused by the people’s reactions.
“Hey, that’s not nice!” Peter said, pulling the man backwards using his web as he had done with Derek.
As expected, the guy flew backwards, but not as much as Peter had thought he would. He must not have put enough strength in his pull. Peter went to start shooting the webs that would lock him in place, but he felt the back of his neck tingle. Something was coming at him. He quickly stepped sideways, hoping he was moving in the right direction. His waist suddenly stung. He could feel a burning sensation across it but knew he had not been burnt; it was something else. Peter quickly spun around to see what had caused it. The second guy was holding a knife that had some red on its tip. Shit, had Peter been stabbed? No, it would have hurt much more, and he would have probably felt the thing go in; he must have gotten nicked. Let’s hope it did not cut him too badly. There were no major arteries there, right? So he should be fine, right? Peter got flung to the side, his face now hurting like hell. He crashed into the ground and barely managed to not let his head slam into the pavement. He needed to get up now; being on the ground like that left him in too much of a vulnerable position; he had learnt that the hard way. Peter put his hands properly flat on the ground, ready to push himself backwards enough to hopefully get some space from the two men, but something applied pressure on his back, trying to keep him on the ground. Peter could probably fight against it as he was stronger than the two men. However, this moment of hesitation, of trying to figure out what was happening to him again, gave one of the men the opportunity to start kicking him. The guy was kicking one of his sides, hard. By some miracle, it was not the side he had been cut on. Still, it was anything but pleasant, and Peter had to get out of this situation.
Pushing through the pain, Peter thought back to what his boxing teacher had taught him. He had told Peter to put himself in the foetal position to protect his body and do anything to protect his face, but Peter could not move, and his face was not under attack. What else? He had told him it was better to play dead/injure if the kicks were not too harsh than to risk the person trying to inflict more significant damage if Peter knew they could not fight them or flee them for sure. Could Peter fight them? He was not sure, but he could definitely flee from them. Thus, he knew what he needed to do. As the man went for a kick again, Peter quickly grabbed his ankle and pulled hard. That was one momentarily down, now onto the second one who still had his foot on Peter’s back. Not giving the man time to process what had happened to his ‘friend’, Peter pushed hard against the ground, making himself and the man fly backwards. As soon as the pressure disappeared, Peter gasped for air. He had not realised how much he had been suffocating. However, there was no time for feeling relieved. Still in the air, Peter threw webs from both his writs to the closest wall and once again pulled hard. His body changed direction, now flying onto the wall, which he quickly gripped and disappeared onto the roof.
As soon as he was safe onto the roof, figuring the men would not be able or bother to try to follow him there, Peter let himself fall onto the floor. His ears were ringing, and his head was spinning. It somewhat hurt to breathe, but not as much as the first time he had been beaten up. He had been beaten up twice now. Peter could not help but let out a laugh. He had been beaten up twice in less than six months. How nuts was that?! The worst thing was it was his fault: both times, he had caused it by sticking his nose where it did not belong.
“Peter!”
Someone was calling him, but how did they get onto the roof?
“Peter! Answer me, are you hurt?”
The better question was how they knew who he was. Was he not wearing his suit and mask?
“I told you this was stupid, I told you, I…”
Right, it was Gwen. Peter groaned and shook his head, trying to force himself to be fully lucid and aware again.
“I’m okay. I just got some minor injuries,” Peter said. “It’s nothing too bad, but I should probably stop for tonight.”
“You think?!” Gwen audibly sighed through whatever the communication device was. “Come back to my flat. I’ll deal with your injuries and we’ll go over what happened tonight, okay?”
Peter nodded before realising Gwen could not see that.
“Okay. I’ll be on my way soon.”
He just needed a second to rest, to catch his breath and for his mind to stop spinning.
“If you’re injured, you should make your way back now. Even if they are minor injuries, you might have internal bleeding, and waiting could mean not making it back,” Gwen explained.
That made sense, and this was without taking into account that he knew for sure he was bleeding since he had cut with a knife. Gwen was going to be anything but happy when she would see that, so Peter should not risk angering her any more. He sighed and stood back up.
“I’ll get changed and be on my way.”
Chapter 35: Mirrror mirror on the wall
Notes:
I’ve survived, yay! Those past two weeks have left me _exhausted_. I’m really looking forward to having a break of a few days (somewhat, I have still things to do, yay…).
So yeah, sorry about the delay, but here is chapter 35. I was not sure I was going to keep this chapter in the story until a few hours ago. I really need to get back to writing as well. I’ve stopped at probably the worst place to stop so that’s fun. I’m going to set myself a small achievable word count goal for the next few days and hopefully that will get me back into writing the story (or I’ll do a cleanse from writing for a few days if I get too frustrated but not for too long or I’ll risk creating a routine where I do not write and I obviously do not want that).
Anyway, enough of my nonsense, I hope you enjoy this chapter.
Content Warnings
Body image issues, sexualisation, discrimination
(It feels very silly to put this here after that first line but): Minor and vague spoilers for the Doctor Who episode “human nature” (series 3 episode 8) from “The episode started” to “As the episode played”.
Chapter Text
Peter had been lucky, the cut he had gotten was not really deep. Gwen had managed to patched it up herself, meaning Peter did not have to go to an hospital and get himself into trouble. It had been a painful process, but he was so very grateful at how extraordinary Gwen was. She knew so much and was incredible at applying her knowledge to do things she had never done before, like how to take care of a knife cut to someone’s side. Peter knew that she was not infallible, that if he had had gotten actually stabbed, he would have had to go to an actual hospital, but he had not been stabbed. He had moved out of the way at the right moment and that was what mattered. Gwen had been less than thrilled, though. She apparently had not enjoyed having to patch Peter up, and had made quite a face seeing the nice suit she had gotten him already damaged. She had lectured him the whole time she had been taking care of the cut and checking on his other injuries. Listening to her rants, Peter had realised how she was only mad at how Peter had not been more careful while handling the situation, not about how he had put himself in it in the first place. She had even mentioned how he should have to analyse the scene longer next time before jumping in to avoid getting confused and basically freezing like he had. Did that mean she was somehow now fully on board with this crazy vigilante thing? It did sure seem that way to Peter. Maybe she had understood why Peter needed to do it, how sometimes theory was not everything? It was better for him to get hurt by random people than to get caught by the lab. They could definitely not afford Peter getting caught by the lab. What was a bummer though, even more so than all the pain he was feeling right now, was that he was definitely not going to be able to use his bare chest to get Harry out of bed for a while, not with his cut and all of his nasty bruises. He would have to find another reward to motivate him, and hope Harry would not notice anything.
By some miracle, Peter had managed to last three vigilante sessions in total before Harry brought up any concern he might have. They were hanging out at Peter’s flat on a Saturday evening, meaning that Peter was still sore from his vigilante work on the previous night. Peter would have tried to come up with an excuse to rescheduled their chill night, but he had not had the chance to really hang out with Harry since the previous week-end, during which Peter had basically not let his couch. As he was getting better at using his powers and fighting abilities in real situations, Peter had started to intervene more often and thus he would still end up with quite a collection of bruises by the end of the night. Having to protect his face at all cost to avoid any too visible bruise also surely did not help trying to avoid getting hit sometimes. Still, despite feeling way too tired for it to be a Saturday night, Peter was so very happy to spend it with Harry. Peter was yet again spread out all over the couch, his legs going over Harry’s lap who was reading his usual book. They already had dinner, which had been made by Harry, and they were done with their work for the night. Thus, the only thing left to do was to enjoy the evening and try to not fall asleep before nine pm.
“Should we watch some Doctor Who?” Harry offered. “It has been a while.”
It had been indeed a while since the last time they had watched an episode. When was that? It must had been back during the Christmas break, before Harry had been cut off, nearly a month ago. That both seemed forever ago and not that long ago. Harry was doing somewhat better, acting happier around Peter, but Peter knew he still had rough nights, even if he was now hiding them more.
“Sure.” Peter smiled.
Peter moved his legs off of Harry to stand up and put the show on the TV, but Harry beat him to it.
“Don’t worry, I remember exactly which one we stopped on,” Harry said, indeed selecting the correct one. “This one, right?”
“I think so, yeah.”
Harry looked proud of himself, smiling as he put it on and then sat back down on the couch. Peter straightened up, sitting next to him. The episode started, it was ‘Human Nature’, a somewhat bittersweet episode, but Harry did not know that yet. They watched, as the Doctor fell in love with that sweet woman. As the episode played, Harry slid an arm around Peter, apparently looking for some physical contact. Peter would have happy to give him some by scootching closer to him and either resting his head on Harry’s shoulder or letting him rest his on Peter’s shoulder, but unfortunately, Harry managed to place his hand on a nasty bruise Peter had on his ribs, probably the nastiest one he had. Immediately, Peter tensed up, biting down his bottom lip trying to stop himself from letting out a yelp from the pain. Harry must have noticed something was wrong as he removed his hand, but did not say anything. Oh no, he must have thought Peter did not want him to touch him. Had Peter hurt him? How could he reassure him? Peter put his head against Harry’s shoulder, hoping it would counterbalance the reaction he just had had. The episode came to an end and Harry had not tried to wrap an arm around Peter again, but had let him rest his head against him. Peter did not move as he waited for the next episode to play, the story being split into two episodes, but Harry slowly reached for the remote. Peter removed his head to let him and watched as he stopped the second episode from playing.
“You want to wait before seeing the next part? Or you did not like the story?” Peter asked, curious as they would usually watch both episodes when stories ran over like it did now.
“I did like the story, it’s quite different…” Harry replied, resting his back again on the couch.
Peter looked at him, confused, as something felt off. Had Peter actually hurt him with his reaction?
“I…” Harry started, looking at his hands.
Peter frowned. Harry would struggle with words only when something was wrong.
“You know Dave’s just a friend, right?” He said, now looking at Peter.
Upon hearing that name, Peter was reminded of how that Dave guy had tried to convince Harry to go back to the lab, making him frown. Thinking of Dave and the lab was definitely not something Peter wanted to do tonight, especially when he had been out there, putting his butt in danger and getting bruises every Friday night to get ready to stop them. Once Peter got over the wave of dislike that had just hit him, he ran what Harry had just said through his brain again. Yes, Peter was not happy that Harry was bringing up Dave, but why was Harry bringing him up in the first place? Especially when wording it in the way he had?
“Yes, why would I not know that?” Peter asked, now even more confused.
Had Peter missed something? Should he be worried about something? Should he be thinking that they were actually not just friends? Then what would they be? Was Harry worried that Peter was thinking that Harry was cheating on him or something? Why would he be worried about that?
“It’s just that…” Harry struggled once again to find his words, worrying Peter even more. “You did not seem very happy meeting him.”
That was probably because Peter was not happy to meet him. Peter should have hid that fact better. He should have not frowned upon hearing Dave’s name either as that had surely not helped his case either.
“Meeting new people is tough for me, I did not like you very much either when we first met.” Peter shrugged.
Harry looked at him for a few moments before a soft smile appeared on his face.
“I know,” He said in his voice that felt like a hug. “But ever since then you’ve been more cold. I know I’m more a fan of physical contact than you are, but you seem to be avoiding my touch more. You’ve also been changing only in a separate room, which is totally fine, you do not owe me to let me touch you or to show me your body, but it…” Harry sighed. “It just made me worried that something was wrong, between us.”
Harry looked down, visibly upset as his smile was now gone and his eyes seemed so far away. Peter was feeling suddenly very guilty as he was the one causing this.
“And the only thing I came up with to explain this was that you were jealous of Dave or something…”
“I’m not,” Peter quickly said, wanting to stop Harry from looking so sad.
Harry looked up.
“Is it me then? Did I do something wrong?”
“No!” Peter said loudly.
Harry looked at him, his eyes locking with Peter’s as they were trying to pierce them to look straight into Peter’s brain. Harry had not given him that kind of look in a long time. Peter sighed. He should have been more careful, think more about how he was acting could affect Harry. He had been too busy trying to protect him that he had been accidentally hurting him. Peter wanted to explain to him that none of this was his fault, that Peter was injured, that was why he was suddenly so distant, but he could not. Harry would absolutely want to know how Peter had gotten those injuries and make sure they did not happen again, so what could he tell him? He did not want to lie to him, yet again. Peter had so many lies floating already around him, he did not want to add one more between him and his boyfriend.
“Then why?” Harry asked him. “Am I making everything up?”
Peter could have told him that yes, he was making everything up. That was the easiest route to take, letting Peter ignore all the hurt he had caused and not having to come up with an excuse that was somehow not a lie, but that was not right. Peter was not going to invalidate Harry’s feelings, that would be an awful thing to do. Instead, Peter decided to share something with him. It was something vulnerable, and that had been on his mind every time he would wear the suit Gwen had given him.
“I’ve…”
God that was embarrassing. It was embarrassing that Peter was feeling this way and it was even more embarrassing to share it.
“I’ve been feeling insecure, about the way I look.” Peter looked away, his face burning, begging for him to hide it in his hands.
Before he could put his hands on his face and try to disappear in them forever, Harry slowly put one of his hand on Peter’s arm, as if he had read his mind and have seen the urge Peter was fighting.
“How so?”
Harry’s voice was void of judgment, so were his eyes and face as Peter looked back to them. Harry’s eyes were not trying to pierce through Peter anymore, they were simply looking at him, waiting for him to say more. Could Peter say more?
“My body, it’s…”
The words had spilled out of his mouth, before he had realised it, but now he had to finish his sentence.
“Well, we both know it’s not the most attractive one for a guy.”
Peter forced out a bitter laugh as he finally looked away. Peter knew he had never been what people imagined when they would picture an attractive man. It may have not been the main, or real, reason Peter had started to hide this body from Harry, but it was true. He was too short, too skinny, his frame was too small. He knew that some people were into that body type, even for men, but it would always be on feminine men that would often get so sexualised. He knew what people would call them, especially in the gay community. He felt guilty for it, but that term would make his skin crawl, make him hate his body even more, that it would only considered “good” when sexualised in such a way. He was happy that people could embrace it, be happy with it, but that was not how he wanted to be perceived, it felt like people trying to mould him into something he had to be because of his body. He was either looked down as weak and a loser, or sexualised and looked at as something that was supposed to be submissive and be open about it. Peter had never shared this or complained about it, he knew he should not, that it was silly, especially when there were other body types that lead to actual discrimination, when his had never. It felt too much like going “oh poor me” when people were actually suffering, having medical care withheld from them. That, and it was simply embarrassing for a guy to be so insecure about his body. He could just go to the gym and shut up about it instead of whining about it.
As Peter got lost in his own thoughts and shame, he felt Harry’s hand squeeze his arm, before releasing its grips and stroking it using his thumb instead.
“I know it doesn’t change what other people have told you, and I don’t want to minimise or ignore your feelings, but I find you attractive. I find you very attractive, even. But I’m sorry that you have to deal with those feeling. Is there anything I can do to help fight them?”
Peter looked back at him. There was still no judgment in eyes, just sincerity. Of course Harry would try to comfort and help him when it should be Peter doing that for him. Still, Peter was so very much grateful for him, for how once again he was making Peter feel safe despite him sharing something vulnerable and embarrassing. Suddenly desperate for his warmth, Peter put his head on Harry’s shoulder again and closed his eyes.
“You’re already helping,” Peter whispered.
Harry was the most attractive guy Peter knew, and here he was, finding Peter attractive. Peter knew that he should not base his sense of self-worth on someone else’s opinion, but it still helped to hear this reassurance.
“Glad to hear that, hot stuff.”
This was so unexpected, even coming from Harry, that Peter laughed before he had the time to be embarrassed.
“Harry…” Peter said, rolling his eyes.
“What? I’m sorry if I find you so attractive that I’d let you do anything you want to me.”
Strangely, this did not make Peter feel gross. On the contrary, it was nearly stroking his ego, but he knew Harry was kidding. That was what Harry would do, make flirty jokes, that was his thing.
“You really cannot stay serious for more than five minutes, can you?” Peter said, straightening up again as he felt his neck hurting a bit.
“I’m being serious.”
“Oh.”
He had really thought it was simply Harry trying to make him blush, but he was actually serious. Peter was not sure how to feel about that, or rather, he did not let himself think about it too much. It was not like they could actually do anything, not with all the bruises Peter had on his body, and he was not really in the mood for that kind of things anyway after having been confronted yet again with his insecurities. He appreciated it, though, what Harry was trying to do, but the lab was, as always, getting in the way.
“Sorry, I still don’t feel in the right mood, I…”
“No, no, no, it’s fine!” Harry cut him off, straightening up and turning his body towards Peter. “I just wanted you to know I was being serious and not just placating you, but ‘anything’ includes ‘doing nothing’. Okay?”
“Okay.” Peter smiled.
Harry returned his smile and gently took his hand in his, as if he was afraid to break it. He was looking so cute, being so gentle and nearly as awkward as Peter was on a regular basis.
“I would not be opposed to a kiss, though,” Peter said, rubbing his fingers against his boyfriend’s.
“I will happily sacrifice myself to make my dear Prince Pete happy,” Harry replied in an over the top voice, acting all dramatic.
“Oh, shut up,” Peter replied, rolling his eyes as he fought a smile.
A smirk formed on Harry lips and, knowing what was to come, Peter kissed him before he could talk. The kiss was quick, but soft and comforting and thus the most appropriate kiss in this situation. Still smirking, Harry took Peter’s hand, mixing their fingers together. Peter also took Harry’s hand, enjoying being touched somewhere that did not hurt. As Peter started to rub one of his finger against Harry’s, Harry softly bumped his forehead against Peter’s, resting it against his. Peter let him and closed his eyes. Everything was calm and quiet, but also warm. There was not the sound of all the other students around him, there was not the wind hitting Peter’s face, or the pain of a missed punch. There was only Harry with his comforting presence and his warm body.
“May I ask if something in particular made those feelings resurface?” Harry asked, his voice as soft as ever as he kept his forehand against Peter’s.
“No, not really…”
That was a lie, the suit had made them resurface, but he was already technically lying about how much those feelings were affecting him, so his plan of not lying to Harry had already failed.
“I don’t know, it just… came up,” Peter said, sighing and keeping his eyes closed.
“I see, I’m sorry it did.”
Peter did not reply, as there was nothing for him to say to that, anything he could have said felt wrong when he was overselling the impact of this problem on their relationship.
“If you ever need to talk about this, or anything else, I’m here, okay?” Harry said, squeezing Peter’s hand. “I’ll listen to whatever you have to say and I promise to do my best to keep the flirting at the minimum.”
Harry managed to make Peter laugh yet again during this serious conversation. How could Peter not laugh when Harry would say the most ridiculous things in such a charming way? Peter loved that about him, he realised, his way with words, how he knew always what to say to make Peter feel better. It probably came with somehow understanding him fully, Peter assumed. A smile stayed on Peter’s face, even when he was done laughing, and Peter opened his eyes to see that Harry seemed to be in the mood to match it.
“Okay, thank you. I’m also here if you need to talk,” Peter replied, also squeezing Harry’s hand.
“I know you are,” Harry whispered.
Harry delicately kissed Peter’s cheek, his lips barely grazing it, as if it was an old parchment that could fall to dust at any moment if not handled with care. Peter still enjoyed it, feeling the love behind the gesture. However, Peter felt bad. Harry was being so caring and considerate, acting as the perfect boyfriend, when Peter had hurt him with his carelessness. Yes, it was to protect him in the long hurt, but it did not erase any of the hurt caused each time he had acted distant because of his hidden injuries.
“I’m sorry I worried you,” Peter said as he loosened his hold on Harry’s hand to instead stroke the back of his hand with his thumb.
“It’s okay, I should have known better,” Harry quickly replied.
This, for some reason, made Peter’s guilt intensify. Maybe it was because he still did not actually know what was going on.
“I shouldn’t have put you in the spot like I did, I’m sorry,” Harry then added.
Peter had always thought that apologising to one another was this tough thing that even people in relationship had troubles doing, but here there were, apologising to each other again and again. But did Peter’s apologies really count when he was still hiding the truth and misleading Harry? Or was he just being fake while Harry was being a good person?
“We’re really apologising to each other as if it’s a competition,” Peter said, eager to make the conversation light again so he could ignore his guilt.
“If it is one, then I’m winning.”
All of the pain and stress, all of the possible mental damage that Peter might inflict upon himself, all of that was worth it if it meant Harry could smiling like he was right now. Peter would have kept on admiring Harry’s smile to try to be able to recall every tiny detail about it, but Harry let go of his hand and instead reached for the remote.
“Let’s watch that second episode, should we?”
“We shall.” Peter smiled
The episode started playing and Peter had to fight the urge to try to cuddle with Harry. He knew it would hurt like hell and he could not do that now, not after using his body image issue to cover for why he was being so weird with physical contact right now. Instead, he flopped his head against Harry’s shoulder again and tried to push down the guilt that was still lurking in his stomach. Yes, he had found a way for Harry to not ask questions about why he was being so weird with his body, but it was one more lie. Were all the lies worth it? To protect Harry, yes there were. Focusing on that, on his single reason for why he was doing all of his doing, Peter managed to shove his guilt so far down he was now able to enjoy watching the show while stealing some of Harry’s body heat.
Chapter 36: Missing persons
Notes:
Please look at this AMAZING art made by my beta reader Yen (yenshuii un bluesky) of Peter playing with Harry's hair and Harry wearing Peter's favourite jumper!!!!
https://64.media.tumblr.com/211c50f9be0731159def3a971cc68d63/f2699fb332814cbb-7f/s2048x3072/9c623965f3cf326b959d60888c9b3226b43d2f72.pnj
The next chapter will be posted on the 9th of February.
Chapter Text
It was weird to think this was going to be his last or second to last evening playing vigilante around town. Peter was not sad that he was not going to be putting himself in trouble every Friday evening anymore. No, that was actually some good news. However, he had developed a routine. It was a strange thing to say, but Peter had gotten used to spending his Friday evenings helping people and stopping crimes before reporting everything back to Gwen at the end of the night. Then, he would spend his Saturdays and Sundays recovering while doing homework with Harry. It was not the best routine in the world, but it was not the worst either. Peter could imagine a whole range of worst routines, like not being able to spend his week-ends with Harry, for instance. It was also certainly much better than what was waiting for him: breaking into the lab. They had actually set a date for that: the 27th of March, or exactly in the middle of spring break and in less than three weeks. Peter knew it made sense; there would be fewer people around on campus during spring break and tonight marked already his fifth night acting as a vigilante. He had learnt what he had needed to learn; delaying it only meant the experiments in the lab possibly getting more messed up and increasing the chances Harry might go back there. Still, the thought of actually going back was, once again, stressing him out. Part of him just wanted to keep delaying things. How could he not when Harry had not expressed any desire to return to the lab since the Dave-incident, and their conversation about Peter’s body image issues had clearly made him stop worrying about Peter’s behaviour? However, no matter how much he hated admitting it, Peter knew Gwen was right. They had to take advantage of Spring Break and make them move instead of risking a break-in when so many students were still going around campus, even if Peter was less than thrilled about it.
Thus, tonight, as he jumped from building to building, Peter tried to appreciate the night a little more than he usually did. It felt like he had been convicted to life in prison, and this was his last night of freedom before getting locked up. He knew he should not feel this way; if everything went well, it would only take a few days after the break-in for the press to run their stories and for Peter to finally be able to stop worrying about Harry’s safety. He should be excited and looking forward to it, but instead, he caught himself taking more risks. He was not sure what that meant about him or his mental state, but he was not in the mood to think much about it. So, instead, he stopped yet another mugging. He was rather good at stopping those as he really had the process down: he knew where to shoot his web, how to pull exactly the object the person had stolen before swinging it to their rightful owner and sticking the thief in place. He did sometimes wonder how long his webs would usually hold. He had never tried to time it, but it was apparently not long enough, as he had already seen the same face twice before. Still, it was better than not doing anything, and at least he was getting good at immobilising people without fighting.
As he looked at the person he had just given their backpack to run away, Peter sighed. It had been a long night. Gwen had spent its entirety muted, probably watching a movie with their communication device in one ear as if she was just chilling out with a baby monitor next to her in case the baby, here, Peter, needed something. He did not blame her for leaving him to do his own thing, though. Her job was literally just to make sure he was not getting himself in too much danger. However, after a long night of jumping, shooting web and fighting, Peter could not help but envy her a bit and imagine what movie she might be watching. Despite his longing for a chill evening, Peter could not bring himself to go home despite it being later than usual. That feeling of this being his last moment of freedom was too strong. He knew it did not make sense, especially when Harry was coming over tomorrow, but that did not change anything. He could not spend the entire night crime-fighting, though; he would have to go home at some point.
“Hey, spider-guy!” Someone yelled out.
Peter quickly turned around. A woman was standing about ten feet away from him. She had dark hair, clothes not really weather-appropriate, as if she had been inside and had just run out, and looked a bit older than Peter. She might have been around Gwen’s age, but Peter was not sure, he sucked at guessing people’s ages. During his vigilante nights in this neighbourhood, Peter had gotten to know some people, some really nice and chill people. He even had gotten a sandwich and some ice cream once as a thank you for stopping a hold-up in a corner store – eating that ice cream outside in the cold had definitely not been a good idea. So, it was not too weird for someone to call out to him; it was just surprising, especially since he did not think he had seen her before.
“I go by Spider-Man,” Peter quickly said.
Upon hearing some of the nicknames people had come up with for him, Peter had learnt to make a point of what he wished to be called. It was awkward, but better than to be called ‘web-shooting guy’ or ‘white-goo man’.
“Right, spider-man. You have a minute?”
Peter supposed he had a minute when his plan had to go back to jumping from building to building to ignore his feelings a bit longer. He did wonder what the woman wanted as she did not seem to be in any kind of danger. Maybe she needed help with something? That was probably also part of the job, helping people out when asked.
“Yeah, sure.”
That was another thing the mask was useful for: hiding Peter’s awkward expressions. Having something to hide his expressions felt quite nice, especially when he knew he was shit at controlling them. However, it did not completely mask his feelings, as his voice would still somewhat betray him. The woman walked towards him, closing some of the distance between them with a lot of confidence. She was still a few feet away from him, but she was sure as hell not worried that Peter might be a psycho that might hurt her. Could he blame her when he looked the way he did?
“You go around town, right? And look for sketchy things?”
Well, it did not seem like she needed help with something like telling someone to back off, but maybe she was looking for something? Or wanted to know if Peter had seen something? Had someone stolen something from her? Or was this a trap, and she wanted to see if he had been a nosey witness to something? Even if it was that, Peter knew that her questions were not really questions; she already knew the answers. He could hear it in her voice and knew that people had been noticing him, so they might have talked about him. Gwen was right, he should stop with the vigilante session before he became too well-known around here and the chatter would reach the lab. Was she sent by the lab? That thought made Peter’s blood run cold as his entire body tensed up. He could feel that his heart had started to beat faster. There was no reason for Peter to assume that she was involved with the lab, but he knew he had to still be careful.
“I do… Yeah,” He managed to say despite his sudden wave of anxiety.
The woman nodded and suddenly stepped forward again as she reached for something in her purse. Instinctively, Peter stepped back, ready to shoot a web on her hand if needed. The woman stopped moving and looked up from her bag to Peter with an amused smile.
“What, do you think I have a weapon or something? My purse is way too small for that, buddy; size does matter sometimes.”
Peter blushed not only at that double-meaning sentence but also from seeing how funny the woman seemed to find his reaction. She might not have space for a gun or a big knife, but she could still have a syringe or a spray in her purse. It would actually be smart of her to have some pepper spray in there, should Peter recommend that to her? That would probably be weird. So, instead, he watched her pull out a phone from her bag. It was a smartphone, but the screen was a bit cracked. It did have a phone case on though, a very pink one. The woman looked at it before turning it to Peter.
“Have you seen him around?” She asked, her phone basically touching Peter’s face.
After taking a small step back to better see the screen without having to squint, Peter looked at the picture. It was of a guy around Gwen’s age, smiling as he was showing a middle finger to the camera. His tongue was sticking out, and he looked happy. He must be someone important to the woman for her to be showing it to Peter, asking him if he had seen it, but why was she asking that? Had he disappeared? Had he run away?
“No, sorry.”
Peter felt bad having to disappoint her, especially as he watched her face slightly crumble. He badly wanted to have seen the guy around, to tell her he was okay, but he had already told way too many lies, and it would not be fair.
“Can you look out for him, please? I…” The woman dug for something in her purse. “I printed a picture of him. Look, it has his name and my phone number in the back. His name is Wade.”
The woman handed him what was apparently a picture of the guy, with ‘Wade’ indeed written on the back, along with a phone number. Peter took it, not really being given a choice. Where was he going to put it? It was not exactly like his suit had pockets. Still, he was going to keep it and try to keep an eye out for this guy, whatever his deal was. Actually, what was his deal?
“Okay, I’ll look out for him and let you know if I spot him, but… Can I ask what’s going on? Why are you looking for him?”
Peter must have asked the wrong question as the woman visibly stiffened, furrowing her bows.
“I… I haven’t seen him in days, haven’t heard from him either. He sometimes gets into trouble, but… he always calls me back when he gets home and…”
The woman seemed to hesitate as if she was unsure whether she should finish her sentence.
“And what?” Peter asked, trying to encourage her to keep talking.
“There’ve been people disappearing lately. It’s a rumour that’s going around. Some people think it is linked to you, but… that does not make sense, you’re seen helping out people, so what would you take people?”
Peter looked at the woman. People were disappearing? How had he missed that?
“It’s just a few people, though, and there’s a lot of people that you’ve helped that are standing up for you and…”
“For how long?” Peter interrupted her. “How long ago did people start to disappear?”
This sudden question seemed to destabilise the woman, as she stammered a bit before replying:
“Not that long ago, just a few days ago, around when Wade went missing.”
Peter took a deep breath. Was it related to the lab? Peter could not tell as he could not think clearly right now, his heart was beating too fast.
“Okay, and has any of them shown up again after going missing?”
The woman shook her head.
“No, not yet.”
It was just a few days, but it was still quite worrying.
“And the police?” Peter asked. “Has anyone contacted them about it?”
For some reason, the question made the woman laugh.
“They don’t care. Either they don’t believe us, they do not give a fuck that people are going missing, or they want to wait a week or two to make sure they will get to look for bodies that are easier to find.”
Great, the police were not doing their job, and now it might fall on Peter. Well, if it was indeed related to the lab, it was going to fall on him anyway.
“Do you know how many people went missing?”
“I’m not sure, less than a dozen, I think, but it’s hard to say. Not everyone talks to everyone, and some people do not have others looking out for them…”
Peter did his best to put all of this information in his head. He knew that Gwen was probably listening to what he was saying, but he was unsure whether she could hear what the woman was saying as well.
“Thanks for telling me,” Peter said. “Anything else I should know?”
The woman shook her head as Peter’s was still spinning.
“You’re not going to disappear too, are you?” She then asked.
She did not sound worried. Well, not exactly. Her tone was weird. Peter could not put his finger on why, though. However, he did feel guilty. The plan was for him to disappear. If he succeeded and took down the lab, he would then be able to put his days as Spider-Man behind him and stop lying to Harry, thus disappearing in a sense. On the other hand, if he did not succeed, he would be taken by the lab and thus disappear as well. No matter what happened, in the end, he would disappear. As he looked at the woman who was staring at him, waiting for a reply, Peter felt himself being stretched in two different directions by people’s expectations. No matter what he would do now, he would let people down and betray them. A new set of guilt settled in him, increasing the pressure on his chest. Why did it feel like every day that passed made it harder for him to breathe?
“I’ll try not to.”
His response had sounded empty, he could feel it and see it on the woman’s face.
“But I will let you know if I see Wade, I promise.” He quickly added, this time meaning it.
“Thank you,” The woman said, nodding. “I’ll leave you to your super-hero duties, then. Good luck.”
“Thanks…”
As he watched her walk back to the busier street from which she must have come, Peter realised she was the first person to call him a ‘super-hero’ outside of Gwen. Was he actually one now? No, he was just some kind of vigilante, a weird guy in a weird costume. Super-heroes did things because they were simply good, Peter was doing all this for Harry. Thus, he should not consider himself one.
“Is she gone?” Gwen’s voice suddenly asked.
Peter jumped a bit, having been lost in his thoughts.
“She is. Did you hear what she said?” Peter asked.
“Not most of it,” Gwen admitted. “but enough to know we need to talk about it. Come back to my flat, it’s getting quite late anyway.”
“Okay.”
Peter thought a sigh, knowing that Gwen would hear it. What felt like his last night of freedom was now reaching its end. Part of him wished he had not bumped into the girl, but he knew that was a very dumb thing to wish for. He looked at the picture she had given him. Would it get damaged if he stuck it to his suit using his webs? Probably. So, instead, he carefully folded it and slid it at the back of his neck. It was very uncomfortable, but it was safe. Then, he shot a web and started to make his way back.
As they did after each vigilante night, Peter stood in his underwear as Gwen examined all of his bruises and injuries. The process was quite mortifying as he had to stand in front of her while basically naked, but how Gwen went about it would quite help. She would catalogue each bruise - there were a lot of them – making sure there was no indication of internal bleeding or any injuries that might need to be treated. She would even take note of injuries she wanted to keep an eye on. For someone who was not a med student, she seemed to know quite a lot about how to take care of injuries. Peter wondered if she had learnt that from her work. She had been working on animals, though, so that seemed quite unlikely. Peter had seen some medicine textbooks on her bookshelf that he did not remember seeing before the break, but she could have not learnt all of that during the Christmas break, could she?
“You’re all good. Good job on protecting your ribs more.”
After a slightly cracked rib that had hurt like a bitch, especially when cuddling with Harry and during the following vigilante night, Peter had learnt to protect not only his head but also his ribs. On the bright side, it had given them more proof to back up their theory that Peter could heal faster than a normal person. He did not have invincibility or extra quick healing by any means; he would simply recover quicker than one would expect. It was frankly quite useful, though, when he was getting injured every week.
“Thanks.”
Peter reached for his trousers and bit his tongue so he would not say that limiting how long Gwen would poke at his ribs had motivated him quite a bit. He quickly got dressed up again as Gwen updated her notes in her blue notebook. She had a bunch of those now, all about Peter, for monitoring and taking notes about different things. It sometimes made him feel a bit like Gwen’s lab rat, but he was not going to complain as he was pretty well treated as lab rat treatment went. Peter put on his sweatshirt and joined Gwen at her small table as she closed her notebook.
“So, people are disappearing,” Gwen stated, looking at Peter.
Right, now that Peter’s check-up was done and out of the way, they had to talk about that lovely piece of information Peter had just gotten. Thinking back to the woman who had let him know about this, Peter instinctively put his hand in his trousers’ pocket where he had put the picture she had given him after changing back. Thankfully, it was still there and had not fallen out on the way back to Gwen’s. Peter would have felt absolutely awful if it had.
“They are,” Peter answered.
He then told Gwen everything the woman had told him, unsure what parts she had heard. As he did so, Gwen listened without interrupting, frowning. He could tell the wheels in her head were turning, probably trying to figure out if it could be related to the lab and how it impacted their plan.
“We don’t know for sure if they have been taken,” she stated once Peter had finished talking.
Peter shook his head.
“She did not say anything about that, so I don’t think she knows,” Peter replied.
Gwen seemed to think about it a bit longer, staring at the table. It kind of reminded Peter of himself; he, too, loved staring at random things as he was focusing.
“The research centre would not simply take people against their will. It’s way too risky, it would cause too much drama and draw too much attention.”
Saying that kidnapping people would cause ‘too much drama’ was certainly not how Peter would have described things, but Gwen did have a point. Abducting people from the streets would be a stupid move to make for the lab.
“Maybe they’re luring people in, somehow,” Peter said.
“Maybe, but how?” Gwen replied, still staring at the table.
It was quite disturbing trying to think of how he would get human test subjects to perform experiments on, but that was just one more messed-up thing he had to do. As he thought more about it, he remembered that sign he had seen forever ago, back during the previous semester.
“They were looking for volunteers at some point, right?” he said, looking at Gwen for confirmation, who nodded in response.
“Yes, but I don’t think…”
“No, they would probably not be the type to volunteer for some random university research happening on the other side of town,” Peter cut her off, already knowing what she was going to say. “But they might be interested in participating in some silly experiment if they’re promised cash or something.”
Gwen stopped looking at the table to look at him instead. Peter took that as his cue to keep going.
“Think about it, you hear about MIT looking for participants for a research study and offering a nice amount of money for your time, that seems like easy, money, right?”
Gwen stayed silent for a few seconds, seemingly pondering the idea.
“Yes, but those people are probably not stupid, they might sense if something is sketchy…” Gwen pointed out
“But why would it be sketchy? It’s MIT, they’ve got a reputation, and if it all looks official…”
“Okay, let’s say they use the university’s reputation and make it look all official. How do they reach the people? They cannot just post something online or advertise it, the university would probably have questions about it, and I would have seen something. They cannot just go around and ask random people either, they’ll look sketchy and they probably have criteria that their participants need to fulfil to be useful to the study.”
She seemed so much in her element. It was as if they were talking about a regular research group doing regular research on willing participants and not about people whore were willing to do messed up things to animals, wanted to move to human trials while still doing those things and not being ready for it, and who had tried to beat up Gwen. Peter knew that she was simply trying to figure out if it made sense for the lab to be involved, just like Peter did, but it was still somewhat unsettling. Surprisingly, though, Peter realised he was not angry or offended at her for it. He used to get that awful feeling whenever she sounded too much like someone who would be willing to capture him to study him by doing messed up things to him. Now, however, he was more disturbed at the thoughts she was putting forward than at her, if that made sense. Maybe it did not, Peter’s feelings often did not make sense.
“I don’t know, maybe they found a way to advertise it without getting noticed, and then screen people, or maybe they –”
“Okay, but does it matter?” Gwen interrupted. “I don’t mean to sound insensitive or anything, but should this rumour about people disappearing actually impact any of our plans?”
Peter frowned. Well, it seemed like he was back to being disturbed by her.
“If people are being kidnapped and experimented on, we should stop that as soon as possible. We should move forward the –”
“We said they’re probably not being kidnapped by the lab.” Gwen interrupted again.
This made Peter want to roll his eyes. She was being technical, she knew what he had meant: yes, they may have been volunteering for the program on their own, but not with informed consent. Peter had learnt quite a lot about consent thanks to Jarvis’s lecture, and he was pretty sure that the people taken by the lab could not actually be considered as properly consenting. If they had not been talking about the lab, Peter would have enjoyed a battle of technicalities, though. He loved annoying his father and mother with those.
“And even if they were,” Gwen continued, “you going in without being fully prepared would not do them any good. You’ll probably just end up joining them.”
Peter tensed up and clenched his jaw. Gwen knew how much he feared getting stuck in the lab and becoming their lab rat. She knew it and was using it against him. That did not feel fair, not at all.
“What tells you I’m not fucking fully prepared,” Peter snapped at her.
Gwen gave him a cold look, cold enough to freeze some of Peter’s sudden anger.
“You might be, but I am not. If you go in right now, I cannot guarantee that I will be able to do my very best to get you out of there, and, contrary to what you may believe, I do want you to get out of there.”
Instead of coming up with a rebuke or getting angry, Peter paused for a moment, considering what Gwen had just said. He observed her face, trying to read her. If Harry’s eyes made him feel like Harry could pierce into his soul to look at it, then Gwen’s felt like they could freeze his soul over, destroying any anger that might have been burning there. Did she actually care if he got stuck there? And if she did, was it because it might throw a wrench in their plans or because she cared about him? She had been healing his injuries every week and had been as gentle as she could be. She had also helped him out of two panic attacks without an ounce of judgment. She had even amended their plan to try to limit Peter’s distress as much as possible when he would break into the lab. It was hard to tell what was because she might care about him and what was a calculated move on her part, though. Well, was it that it was actually hard to tell, or was it because Peter still had trouble trusting her intentions? That did not feel fair. She had kept on taking care of him as best as she could, and after months of working together, here he was, yet again doubting her. Now that Peter was thinking about it, was he not doubting everyone but himself? He had not told Harry what was happening, he had not told his parents or uncles either, or anyone but Gwen in that matter. Peter realised that there was not a single person he trusted to both care for him and help him with the lab. Was he the problem here and not Gwen? Did he even actually care about her?
“What do you suggest, then?” Peter asked, trying to conceal any lingering anger he might still have.
Gwen’s eyes softened, some of their coldness disappearing, but she was not back to her usual facial expression. Maybe she knew Peter was not fully convinced yet, that the battle had not been won yet.
“Look, you’re going in in less than three weeks, but I do need that time for us to go over a plan that’s as foolproof as possible to ensure you do get out of there and with what we need. However, I doubt they will have time to do much during those three weeks if they’ve just started human trials. If they’re not stupid, and I would hope they’re not, they’ll play it safe to make sure they don’t lose test subjects faster than they get them, even if they do not give a damn about them. We’re not talking about cartoon supervillains here; they still work at a world-renowned university, and they need to preserve their reputation.”
Peter listened to Gwen, thinking over every argument and point she made, deciding for himself whether they made sense or not.
“So, considering all this, I would not change when we break in. I, however, think that we need to talk about whether we should change our plan now that we know they might have people stuck there.”
Peter kept thinking about what she had said for a little bit longer as his fingers played with one of his sweatshirt strings. As he kept pulling it and trying to find a flaw in what Gwen had said, Peter suddenly wished he was wearing one of Harry’s jumpers. He was definitely going to have to change into one of the jumpers he had stolen from Harry once he got back to his flat. Thinking of those jumpers, of how he would feel so much better just by wearing them, reminded Peter of his true objective here: keeping Harry safe. It was selfish and very ‘un-hero’ of him, but he could not keep Harry safe if he got caught by the lab while trying to rescue other people. It would actually make him much less safe now that the entire world knew about their relationship.
“Okay, we wait,” Peter said, pulling the string a bit harder. “Let’s talk about how it would affect the plan, then.”
He was eager to go back home and slip under the covers with as many of Harry’s jumpers as he could find in his flat. Gwen finally took her eyes off him and leaned back in her chair.
“It doesn’t have to, this is up to you. If we stick to the original plan, you go in and focus on finding a computer, nothing else. You get all the proof we need from there and then get the hell out of there. After that, we can let the journalists and proper authorities do their job, resulting in anyone being held against their will being rescued,” Gwen explained.
Okay, this part made sense, but it meant delaying yet again freeing any possible suffering person from the lab.
“Or?” Peter asked, figuring she had already come up with a new plan.
“Or you still look for computers, but also look for people to free if needed. There are two issues with this plan, however.”
This was what would make sense to do: still try to get the proof but also rescue anyone who needed to be rescued, like possibly Wade. Thus, Peter was quite interested in finding out what problems this plan would cause as they should just go with that.
“First, the more time you spend there and the more places you look, the more chances you have to bump into someone and get caught. Secondly, it would mean looking for where they keep… well, where they keep their experiments, and…” Gwen seemed to hesitate, glancing at Peter again. “We’ve both seen why this might not be a good idea.”
That was quite a delicate way to say that the idea of seeing fucked up experiments again had given Peter panic attacks multiple times. Peter nearly chuckled at how much of an euphemism what she had said was.
“Yeah, it might not been the best idea ever…” Peter said, fighting a smile.
“I mean, it would be a great idea if my plan was to get rid of you,” Gwen pointed out.
Peter looked at her with wide eyes as his brain struggled to process what she had said before noticing how the corners of her lips were slightly pointing upward. As soon as Peter realised that Gwen was actually kidding, Peter let out a small laugh, appreciating the sense of humour she was displaying.
“I knew you were healing my injuries just so that the lab could get me in pristine condition,” Peter said as he let go of his sweatshirt’s string, smiling.
“Obviously, why else would I act as your babysitter?” She said before rolling her eyes. “No, but seriously, I get your desire to help, it’s very noble, but you freezing up is a real concern.”
Peter sighed. Even though he had been laughing just a few seconds ago thanks to Gwen’s joke, he knew she was right: having him look for experiments was not a good idea. It made Peter feel like shit, though, to have this new barrier and to have to work around it.
“I can keep working on the original plan and try to make an alternative plan in case you feel up to it, but I would strongly suggest following the original one,” Gwen said.
Her voice sounded softer than it would usually sound, being closer to how she had talked to him during his panic attacks. She was trying to be nice and understanding, Peter realised. Maybe she did care about him, and maybe he should start caring a bit more about her, too.
“Okay.” Peter nodded. “Let’s do that.”
“One last thing,” Gwen said, straightening up and definitely not creating a new wave of anxiety in Peter. “I do not want you out in the streets anymore. If people are disappearing because of the research centre, it’s way too dangerous. I’ll need you to go over things with me next week-end anyway to find any possible flaws I might have missed and see if what I’m suggesting makes sense to you and would work for you.”
Peter’s hand shot to his sweatshirt’s string again, pulling rhythmically on it. He knew that, yet again, Gwen was right, that it was more dangerous for him to be out there. They had already planned for tonight to be his last vigilante night anyway, but Peter thought back to the woman asking him if he was also going to disappear and could not help but feel bad about having lied to yet another person. He had convinced himself that once they had taken down the lab, he could go back to his normal and happy life with Harry and get away from all the guilt that was building inside him. Now, he was not so sure he would ever be able to get fully rid of it.
“Alright, go home and get some rest, you look terrible.”
Gwen stood up, and Peter did the same, letting go of his sweatshirt’s string. He always looked like shit after those vigilante nights, so he had to be looking even worse than usual for Gwen to say that. Or was she trying to get him out of her flat? It did not matter, though, as the result would be the same: Peter booking it out of there and running to hide in his bed.
“Right, see you next Friday.”
He then made a beeline for the door and out of the building, disappearing into the night again as if trying to run away from the weight resting on his shoulders.
Chapter 37: Slander is spoken. In print, it's libel.
Notes:
First, some very exciting news: I have finished writing the fic!!! After nearly three years of writing it and one year of posting it, I have finished the fic. I finished the last chapter a few days ago and my beta reader, yen, finished reading it yesterday, it was approved by her! It will have 44 chapters in total (so there are only 7 chapters left without counting this one) and it currently sits just under 200k words (199,822 words). I still need to do some proofreading and work on some stuff to make sure everything comes across as I want it to, so the total word count might slightly change but the chapter count will not.
I am planning to see if I can try go back to posting every week instead of every two weeks, but that will depend on how long it takes me to proofread/edit stuff and the workload I have irl. So, no promises yet.
Either way, thank you so very much for following along, and I cannot thank enough the people who have commented kind things. It means a lot and gave me the motivation I needed when I would doubt myself. So, thank you so freaking much to Bobross, Drei, the_sunkh, Mia, Blsck_wings77, and aVeryGreenApple. Finally, thank you (for the millionth time) yen for enduring all of my rants and for the incredibly valuable feedback you gave me.
Content Warnings
Norman Osborn emotionally hurts Harry again.
Mentions of underage drinking and possible alcoholism
From "When my mother died, I told you, I went off the deep end." to "I’m sorry you had to do that,"
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Something kept on buzzing. It was the same buzzing noise, over and over again, disrupting Peter’s sleep. It would simply not stop. At first, it had blended inside Peter’s dream, manifesting as a phone ringing in his pocket. When he had realised that his phone would usually not make that noise, Peter had started to slowly wake up and try to figure out what that annoying sound was. He had thought it might be his alarm, but once again, that would not be the sound it was supposed to make. It was only when he had opened his eyes, that it hit him: it was his flat’s intercom. Someone was aggressively buzzing the intercom. Why would someone do that? Either it was a very annoying and dedicated prank, or something was wrong. Trying to figure out which option was the most likely before possibly answering some random person trying to get in the building, Peter reached for his phone. He quickly removed the airplane mode he would activate when he slept. Notifications started to appear. There were so many of them that they would not stay long enough on Peter’s screen for him to read. Once all the notifications had seemed to have popped up, Peter only needed to read who they were from to know something was extremely wrong. Why had Eri not wake him up?! She was supposed to do so when this kind of thing happened. He would try to figure that out later, he needed to open the door right now. Literally jumping out of his bed, Peter ran for the intercom, hitting the button to open the door so hard that it got stuck in that position. Peter had to push it around to unstuck it, and soon enough, there was now banging on his door. He rushed to open it, this time trying to control his strength so as not to rip it out of his hinges.
“I’ve been trying to call you, I’m freaking out, I…” Harry walked in, his entire body trembling. “I can’t go to class, I just can’t!”
He was still in his pyjama trousers. It looked like he had just thrown on a coat and some shoes before running out of his flat. Something really, really bad had happened. Peter felt his own hands shaking uncontrollably as he slammed the door shut. He looked at Harry who standing with his back to him, his hands in his hair as if he was about to pull chunks out of his hair.
“What’s wrong? What happened?” Peter asked as he stepped closer to him.
“Everyone must have read it, they’ll all know, they’ll see it…” Harry said, seemingly talking to himself as his grip seemed to tighten on his hair.
“They’ll all see what?” Peter asked again, putting his hand on Harry’s shoulder.
Peter could feel how tensed his shoulders’ muscles were. Was Harry actually about to rip his hair off of his head? Peter felt that awful yet familiar feeling of something trying to crush his chest, making it harder to breathe. What would cause Harry to get into such a state? He had gotten better, so much better, as he had basically recovered from getting cut off. Peter had not seen him this upset since that horrible day, but even then his reaction had been so different. He had been sad, not frantic like that.
“Oh no, your parents… they’ll see it too! Rhodey too! They’re going to be so disappointed, I’m going to bring them so much shame… They’ve helped me, and now I’ve fucked everything up for them!”
“No you haven’t, Harry, please talk to me. Darling, please,” Peter pleaded, squeezing his shoulder.
Peter was desperate for Harry to tell him what was happening, Peter could not make things better if he did not know what was happening. Harry kept his back to Peter, resisting when Peter tried to gently turn him around by pulling on one of his shoulders. Instead, Harry finally let go of his hair, raising his hands, but they soon came back down before Peter thought of trying to take one of them.
“Bad! Bad! Bad!” He said, hitting his head at each word he spoke.
It was clear that Harry was going through some kind of mental breakdown, and Peter could not let him possibly hurt himself. Not wanting to waste another second during which Harry would keep hitting himself, Peter forced Harry’s arms down, before wrapping his own arms tightly around him. Harry fought him, forcing Peter to use some of his abnormal strength. After a few seconds during which Harry wiggled around as tried to overpower Peter, he finally settled down. Harry’s weight slowly pressed against Peter as his body seemed to be going somewhat limbed. Peter got worried, at first, scared he had hurt Harry somehow, but then he felt Harry’s breathing starting to get even.
“It’s okay,” Peter whispered in his ear. “You’re okay, you’re safe.”
More of Harry’s weight shifted against Peter, and Peter loosened his hold around him. He then slowly guided him to the floor, where they both sat down.
“I’m not…” Harry whispered back.
Harry was sitting in between Peter’s legs, his back still resting against him and making it hard to see his properly face. Maybe it was better for Peter to not be able to see his boyfriend’s face right now. Hearing him say that he was not safe even though he was with Peter was already so painful. What good Peter was if he could not make Harry feel safe? Not sure if it was to bring comfort to Harry or himself, Peter snuggled his face against Harry’s neck and tightened his hold a bit more again. As he then moved his face from Harry’s neck to his cheek, to kiss it, Peter felt it was wet. Harry had probably been crying his heart out and still way. It became Peter’s mission to kiss every single tear he could find on Harry’s left cheek. As he did so, Peter felt Harry’s weight shift again, his body seemingly becoming less and less limp. He took it as a sign that what was he doing was helping, and thus he kept doing it. Some time passed, quite a while actually as Peter could now hear his alarm ring in his bedroom. He ignored it, knowing he was going to skip class today.
“Have you seen it?” Harry quietly asked.
“No, I haven’t,” Peter answered between two kisses.
Peter had no idea what was this horrible thing that Harry was convinced that everyone would see and cause people to be disappointed in him, but it had to be something bad. Right then and there, Peter promised himself to still do his best to protect Harry and love him whatever it was. He knew Harry, he knew it could not be something that would cross any of his hard lines morals-wise. Harry moved his arm, apparently reaching for his pockets, before sighing and letting his arm fall back down.
“I forgot my phone…”
Seeing how Harry had run out of his flat in such a hurry that he had not changed from his pyjamas, that was not surprising. It made Peter suddenly very glad that ringing the intercom had been enough to wake him up. Imagining Harry, outside, alone without even a phone in this state… nope, Peter was not going to think about that.
“I don’t need to see,” Peter replied, following it with a firm kiss.
“Yes, you do…”
“No, I don’t.” Peter cut him off.
“Peter, I…” Harry sighed. “I want you to. I need you to.”
Peter paused. He had thought that not reading whatever was hurting Harry and letting him explain what was happening instead was the right move, but apparently not. Reading it would help Peter understand the situation without having to force Harry to tell him about it himself, and if that was what he preferred…
“My phone’s in my bedroom,” Peter said.
As a response, Harry leaned forward, removing his weight from against Peter, probably to let him get up and go get his phone. At least, that was how Peter understood it, and thus stood back up. He moved towards his room but then stopped as his left foot crossed the doorway out of the living room. He looked back at Harry who was still sitting on the floor, seemingly not having moved an inch since Peter had stood up. Peter knew he was just going to the room next door and that he would probably hear if anything bad was happening, but it did not help much with the feeling in his gut telling him to not leave the room. After taking a deep breath and reminding himself it was just anxiety, Peter pushed through it and left the room. He quickly walked, or rather jogged, to his bedroom. His alarm was still going on, piercing his ears. He rushed to turn that off and then jogged back to the living room with his phone in hand. Harry had moved, but just to put his face in his hands. He did not look like he was hurting himself or anything, so Peter let him be and simply sat back down next to him. As he unlocked his phone Peter realised he had no idea how to find the thing Harry wanted him to read.
“How do I…?”
“Just google my name, Pete,” Harry said, his voice muffled a bit by his hands.
“Okay…”
Was it that bad? Bad enough that Peter would easily find the thing by just googling it? Apparently, it was, as the first result he got was some interview or profile about Norman Osborn and the rest of the results were articles talking about that interview. Seeing that, Peter already understood much better why Harry was in such a state. It was one thing to have people say shit about you, it was another having your father, who had cut you off less than two months ago, denigrate you for the entire world to see. Peter was nearly too scared to open it now; he knew that whatever Norman had said would be horrible and make him feel both absolutely furious and devasted for Harry. Still, he tapped on the article and started reading. It opened somewhat normally, with Norman being asked about boring business stuff that people like his mother and Harry would probably find quite interesting. Peter scrolled down, his eyes skimming the text as he tried to find the part that related to Harry, because there had to be one. Harry’s name popped up towards the middle of the article, and Peter started to read properly as he braced himself for what was to come. As he read, Peter got angrier and angrier. He read about Norman Osborn telling the world about how Harry had been a troubled teenager, always going to parties, drinking, and getting into trouble, but never studying. He read about him saying how he always had to bail Harry out of the messes he had made, all the whilst Peter knew that Norman had not given a shit about what his son was doing at that time. Peter read him completely omitting the fact that Harry had ended up pulling his shit together, realising that he had to become better and actually becoming better. Instead, Norman Osborn framed it as him having to get Harry into MIT by pulling strings when no colleges or universities would have taken him.
All of this was bad enough as it made Harry look like some loser who did not deserve anything he had, but Norman Osborn had not stopped there. No, instead he had kept going on, pretending that his son was doing badly at MIT, drinking and partying again. Peter knew for a fact that was not the case. Hell, he had seen Harry’s grades and had been his only friend, he would surely know if Harry was failing and drinking too much. MIT would know too, as they were the ones grading him. Peter really did not understand why Norman was pretending his son was failing when it was so obviously untrue. However, that was not the worst thing Norman Osborn was alleging, no, no, no, of course not! The man had the fucking gall to lie about why he had cut off Harry. Instead of owning up to the fact that he was an intolerant piece of shit, Norman was pretending it was because Harry had not changed his ways and was refusing to become responsible.
Then, there was the cherry on top: Norman Osborn asking ‘Isn’t it strange that Harry managed to get the CEO of another world-leading robotics company to support him so soon after getting cut off?’. It was painfully obvious that Osborn was implying that Harry was some kind of traitor who had leaked trade secrets from Oscorp to Peter’s mother. Of fucking course, this asshole would imply some shit like that. That was when it hit Peter, why Norman was spewing such horrible lies: it was all about his public image. He did not want to look like the possibly homophobic father who had cut his son off because he was dating a boy from a family he did not like. He, instead, wanted to make it look like Harry was the problem all the whilst taking a swing at the Starks who were now supporting him. His explanations would make sense to the public who did not actually know Harry and would think his grades are fake. Of course, the Stark family would support Harry after he gave them some nice juicy intel. They would maybe even think Harry had made a deal with them as he had known he had been about to get cut off. All of this was bullshit, complete and utter bullshit, so much so that Peter did not manage to finish reading the article. Not because he did not want to, but because his phone cracked in his hand, making a big and awful noise.
“Peter?”
Not having the time to think about it properly, Peter dropped his phone. Harry could not see he had literally squeezed his phone hard enough to break the screen, so instead he had to pretend he had thrown it at the ground.
“Peter, are you mad at me?”
“No, of course not!” Peter yelped before looking at Harry.
He seemed so scared and his eyes were searching for something in Peter’s. Had he thought Peter would blame him too? Why on earth would Peter do that? The way Harry was looking at him, it was nearly too much for him to bear.
“Of course, I’m not mad at you, I…” Peter tried to say but the words got caught up in his throats
Everything hit Peter at once. His heart ached for Harry. He could not begin to imagine how much pain Harry must have been feeling. All Peter wanted was to protect him, to make sure he was safe, but he, too, was terrified. He was going to break into the lab in basically two weeks and people were disappearing, meaning he was probably going to see was so terrified to stumble on. There was the guilt he was carrying, too. Peter felt so much guilt from having to lie to Harry all the time, sneaking around behind his back, and having to do nothing while innocent people might be used as test subjects in horrible experiments. It was so much that Peter felt like he could barely breathe.
“I…”
Peter had to be strong for Harry, Harry needed him now more than ever… But the look in Harry’s eyes, as if he was waiting for Peter to blame him for everything, it was just too much. It was the one too many cracks in Peter’s heart.
“I just want…”
Tears slithered down his cheeks as his words kept on getting stuck in his throat.
“I just…”
Peter let out a painful sob as it became the only noise he was able to make. Arms wrapped around him, and he instinctively clung to them for dear life. Harry pulled him towards him, making Peter’s head rest against his shoulder as he kept on sobbing. It was as if he could not stop now that the dam had been opened. As he cried, he felt Harry hide his face in his hair, wetting it with his own tears.
“I just want to protect you so badly,” Peter said when his sob became more infrequent. “But I don’t know how to protect you from this. I just don’t.”
“You’re not ashamed of me?” Harry asked, his voice making Peter want to completely break down again.
In normal circumstances, the fact that Harry had to ask such a question, that his father had messed up with his brain so much that he would assume that Peter would be ashamed of him because of a stupid article full of lies, would have made him angry. It would have made him want to scream and strongly express his opinions, but crying had drained him. He felt exhausted and knew he would soon get a headache.
“No, I’m not,” Peter said, hiding his face against Harry’s neck. “Of course, I’m not.”
“Promise?”
Peter suddenly felt transported back to the day of their ruined second date when Harry had asked him the same thing. Instinctively, Peter squeezed Harry’s arms a bit more.
“I promise.”
He felt a kiss on his hand and took a deep breath. He needed to pull himself together for Harry. Just because he did not know how to protect Harry from the backlash of that article, it did not mean there was nothing he could do. He knew people who could try to protect Harry, they would surely be able to do something.
“We need to call my parents,” Peter stated. “They can sue for defamation or something. Surely this will be considered as obvious slander, it’s…”
“Libel,” Harry cut him off. “In print, it’s libel. Slander is when it’s spoken.”
Peter paused, taken by surprise Harry’s correction. If they had not both been wrecked, Peter would have been impressed. He moved his head away from Harry’s neck to look at him.
“But technically your father said the stuff, the newspaper just wrote it down,” Peter pointed out, not being able to help himself.
“Yes but it was published in a written format,” Harry replied, letting go of Peter just enough to wave his hand around.
“But it was spoken, though. Your father spoke, he did not write.”
“Yes but…” Harry started to speak but then stopped, and looked down at Peter instead. “Are we really having a debate on whether my own father’s remarks about me would be considered libel or slander?”
Was Harry offended that their conversation had suddenly turned into a debate about the stupidest technicality they could find whilst his life had yet again been trampled down by his father? Was he angry?
“Yes?” Peter asked, bracing himself for whatever reaction Harry might have.
Harry laughed. Well, Peter had not braced himself for that particular one, but he would rather see Harry laugh at the absurdity of their conversation than cry about it. Soon enough, Peter was laughing too.
“I just can’t believe it,” Harry shook his head.
Laughing a bit seemed to have done him some good, but their problem was still not solved. Peter had probably the right idea by wanting to call his parents, though. They would absolutely be able to defend Harry.
“Let’s say defamation, okay? Defamation can both be libel and slander, right?” Peter asked.
Harry nodded.
“This will obviously be considered as defamation, so they’ll be able to do something about it. We should call them.”
Harry bit down his lower lip as his hold on Peter tightened. Did he not want to call Peter’s parents? Peter understood he was probably scared of their reaction, especially when they were being accused of shady business practices by the article, but they would want to help, even more so because of the accusations made against them. They would obviously still want to clear Harry’s name, even without those, but it just made it more obvious to Peter.
“They’ve tried to call me,” Harry admitted, looking off in the distance.
“You didn’t answer?” Peter asked.
Still not looking at Peter, Harry shook his head. He was really that afraid of Peter’s parents’ reaction. Peter could not blame him for it, though. Ever since his mother died, his only parent left had been his father which was the furthest thing of a loving parent. Of course, he would assume they would not want to help but be mad at him.
“They won’t be mad at you, I promise,” Peter said.
Harry did not answer, he did not even move by a hair.
“Can I call them to ask them for help?” Peter asked. “You won’t have to talk to them if you don’t want to, I’ll do all the talking.”
Harry stayed silent and stilled for a little bit longer, making Peter worry he was shutting down again, but he then tried to hide his face against Peter’s hair again.
“Can you do it later, please? I just need a bit more time.”
How could Peter refuse him more time to try to process what was happening?
“Of course, Darling.”
Peter felt Harry sigh at the nickname and hoped it was a good sigh. As he let Harry breathe for a bit, not talking but staying cuddled up against him, it dawned on Peter that he was not sure how he was going to call his parents. Harry did not have his phone on him, and Peter had basically destroyed his. He would normally use Eri, but based on how she had not woke him up despite Harry’s hundreds of calls, something was probably up with her and he did not have the brain capacity to deal with it right now. They would have to walk to Harry’s flat to get his phone. This was hoping that he had not forgotten to take his keys. Should Peter give the keys to his flat to Harry? Maybe, but that was a question for another time.
“You know how you told me about your body image issues?” Harry suddenly said.
It took Peter’s brain a few seconds to go from thinking about flats’ keys to recalling the conversation he had had with Harry on this particular subject.
“Yes?”
A bit of guilt crept in again, making Peter’s stomach not feel so nice. He remembered how he had used it to explain his weird behaviour away to Harry. Harry was the only person Peter had ever told about it, though, and he had not completely lied. Peter had not faked being vulnerable, it had been a truly vulnerable and complicated conversation for him.
“When my mother died, I told you, I went off the deep end.” Harry sighed and Peter wished he could see his face, but it was still hidden against his hair. “I would party and do stupid things, but it was really me trying to get my father’s attention and drinking to cope.”
It made a lot of sense, even though Peter wished it did not. He had heard about teens getting in trouble just to get their parents to pay attention to them. Peter’s heart deeply ached for Harry, but him doing stupid things during high school to then suddenly decide to step up, as he had described it, made so much goddamn sense. It also made Peter’s hate for Norman grow even more. Harry had nearly wrecked his future to get his father to acknowledge him, just for Norman to try to wreck it himself once Harry was finally doing good and was happy. Peter had never been one to wish for someone’s death, but he knew he would not shed a single tear if Norman Osborn was to die tomorrow. Peter was surprised to hear that Harry had used alcohol to cope as well, though, when he still seemed to be so comfortable with drinking wine while underage. However, Peter was not going to judge him for it, no.
“I’m sorry you had to do that,” Peter said, even though it did not properly communicate the sorrow he was feeling for Harry.
“Yeah… Me too,” Harry sighed, making the top of Peter’s head tingle. “But I’ve got you, now. You’re all I need.”
Not able to help himself, Peter hid his face in Harry’s neck, pressing his forehead against Harry’s skin. Yes, Harry meant the world to Peter, but Peter was also very important to Harry. Harry was counting on him, Harry depended on him. Peter had to be careful. Doing everything he could to protect Harry also meant making sure Harry would not lose him. Gwen had been right, breaking into the lab earlier than they had planned to do so would have been too dangerous, especially when Harry was depending on him.
“You’ve also got my parents, they really care about you,” Peter replied.
This was partly Peter’s way of trying to convince Harry to let him ask his parents for help with the situation, and partly making sure Harry knew he had people he could rely on if anything happened to Peter. Peter obviously did not want anything to happen to himself, but he would rather be safe than sorry. So, he had to make sure Harry knew. This was especially true after seeing how he was still so scared their support was somehow conditional even though they had made their best to establish it would not be, or at least not in this way.
“They do?”
Harry sounded surprised. To Peter it was obvious that they did: they had literally stepped up to provide support for Harry after he had been cut off and they obviously had enjoyed having him around. However, after all that Harry’s father had put him through and what Harry had just shared with him, Peter understood why it might not be so obvious to him. Peter needed to get through his boyfriend’s head that his parents did care for him, though. Thus, he slowly backed away from Harry, giving him the time to remove his face from Peter’s hair, and looked at him. Harry’s eyes were still red and he looked exhausted. Peter had to fight the urge to crack a joke, desperate to see a smile on his boyfriend’s face. Instead, he looked into Harry’s eyes, which were already looking into his, seemingly searching for something in them.
“Yes, they do. I promise,” Peter said, trying to use his eyes to show Harry he did mean it.
For a few seconds, Harry did not seem to react as he kept on searching Peter’s eyes. Then, he sighed and unwrapped his arms from around Peter.
“Okay, we can call them,” Harry said, looking away.
A wave of relief washed over Peter. He had figured that Harry would come around eventually and let him ask for help, but he had had no idea how long it would have taken. Furthermore, this also did seem to show that Harry was starting to believe that Peter’s parents did care about him.
Actually calling Peter’s parents proved to be a challenge in and of itself. Indeed, Peter had basically destroyed his phone by gripping it too tightly while reading the article before proceeding to throw it to the floor to hide that, and Harry had left his at his flat. Luckily, Harry had not forgotten his flat’s keys, and after borrowing some clothes from Peter, they both made their way to his flat. Peter would have offered to go retrieve the phone by himself, as Harry seemed to be quite uncomfortable being outside, not so discreetly hiding his face with the hood of the sweatshirt he had borrowed for Peter, but Peter felt anxious at the idea of leaving him alone. Harry was definitely in a better mindset than the one he had come in with, but he was not out of the woods yet. Harry did not complain, though, sticking closely to Peter, so much so Peter had decided to just take his hand. As soon as Peter had done that, Harry had firmly also taken his hand and was walking now even closer to him, their shoulders brushing constantly. It was only when they arrived at his building that Harry let go of Peter’s hand to let them inside. Once in his flat, Harry made a beeline for his phone, before walking back towards Peter and handing it out to him.
Harry still wanted Peter to do the talking apparently. That was fine, Peter did not mind. He understood, he knew what it felt like for your brain to try to protect itself by not talking, even if it was only to specific people. Harry had been so understanding when it had been Peter who had gone silent, so the very least Peter could do was to return the favour. Thus, he took the phone. As he looked down at it, he saw that Harry had opened Peter’s mother's contact. Not wasting time wondering if Harry had chosen her over Peter’s father on purpose, Peter called the number. It did not take long for Peter’s mother to answer, the phone had barely had the time to ring.
“Harry, sweetheart, are you okay?” Peter’s mother's voice asked.
Clearly, she had seen the article, which was not surprising. It was going to make the conversation easier, Peter would not have to catch her up to speed without losing his mind and with Harry next to him.
“Hi, Mom, it’s me. I’m with Harry, he’s okay,” Peter answered, sitting down on Harry’s couch.
“Oh, thank goodness. We’ve been so worried, we…”
Peter heard some noise interrupting his mother, it sounded a bit like his father talking. Was his mother home? She would have normally already left by now.
“Yes, it’s Peter. He’s with Harry.” She sounded further from the phone as she said that. “Could we talk to Harry, please?”
Peter shot a look at Harry. He was pacing around the living room, his eyes wide and with one of his hands placed on the back of his head. Peter suddenly got nervous, scared he was going to try to pull his hair or hit himself again, but it did not look like he was doing any of that.
“He…” Peter paused, trying to figure out how to phrase things. “He doesn’t really feel up to it.”
“Oh, poor, sweetheart…” Peter’s mother said.
Again, Peter’s father seemed to be talking in the background, and his mother caught him up again. There was a shuffling noise over the phone, making Peter wince a bit as it hurt his ear, but he did not stop looking at Harry.
“Hi, kid,” Peter’s voice said over the phone. “Can you tell him he’s still my favourite son-in-law, please?”
That was a surprising request. Peter knew that his father knew that Harry actually liked that nickname, he also knew that he did not like Harry’s father, at all, even before Harry got cut off. Peter had also told them before the Christmas break to not bring up Harry’s family in front of him, so had Peter’s father put all the pieces together and formulated a guess on what Harry needed to hear? Hopefully.
“Harry,” Peter tried but Harry did not react, apparently lost in his thoughts, still pacing. “Harry, Darling.”
The nickname worked, as Harry stopped dead in his tracks and looked at Peter. It was embarrassing to have used this nickname with his own father on the line, but Peter pushed that thought to the side, having bigger things to worry about.
“My Dad wants me to tell you that you’re still his favourite son-in-law.”
It was a bit silly if you thought about it. Harry was not only not technically Peter’s father's son-in-law, but even if he was, he would be his only son-in-law. Despite that, it still had an effect, as Harry had not started walking again, but instead had teary eyes.
“You can put them on speaker,” Harry said after a few seconds.
As Peter did so, Harry came to sit next to him on the couch.
“You’re on speaker,” Peter said.
“Hello to my kid-in-law!” Peter’s father replied. “Okay, hang on. Let me put you guys on speakers as well.”
“Harry, sweetheart?” Peter’s mother said.
Clearly, his parents had also figured out that nicknames helped soothing Harry. Or maybe it was just luck, in any case, Peter was glad they were using them, as Harry scootched a bit closer to the phone. He was looking at it, nervously nibbling his lower lip.
“Do you want to talk?” Peter whispered to him, not wanting to put him on the spot.
Harry nodded and then took a deep breath as Peter brought the phone closer to him.
“Hi, I’m…” Harry sighed. “I’m sorry, the optics of it look terrible for you and if…”
“I don’t give a shit about the optics of it, kid,” Peter’s father cut him off. “Pepper doesn’t either.”
Peter noted how his father had used the nickname he would use for him, but was not sure what to make of it. Harry seemed to have noticed it too, or he was simply surprised by Peter’s father's bluntness.
“He’s right,” Peter’s mother said. “We’re not mad at you, sweetheart, we’re worried for and about you.”
Harry quickly wiped what must have been a tear on his cheek before clearing his throat.
“I…”
Harry shot Peter a look. Despite not being sure what that look was for, Peter smiled, trying to encourage him. Talking to people was hard, but it could sometimes help.
“I feel worthless,” Harry said in what was nearly a whisper.
Conflicting emotions bumped into each other in Peter’s head. He wanted to cry and beg Harry to believe he was not worthless. He also wanted to explode, screaming that same thing, showing him how ridiculous that thought was. Part of him also wanted to find a way to smush their brain together to make Harry see how Peter saw him. Finally, deep inside him, bubbling anger made him want to go straight to the source of all of those insecurities and make sure he would never, ever, hurt Harry again.
“You listen to me, favourite kid-in-law.” Peter could hear how his father was trying to control his own anger. He, too, probably wanted to pay Norman Osborn a visit. “You’re a bright, amazing young man. You’ve done nothing wrong, and there is nothing, absolutely nothing wrong with you. You hear me?”
“You do have worth, Harry,” Peter’s mother added. “You’re hardworking and have a huge heart, that’s what matters. Don’t let your father define you.”
Tears started to roll again down Harry’s cheeks as Peter’s parent kept reassuring him and bringing up all of his wonderful qualities and worth. Peter fought his desire to take Harry in his arms to let him talk in peace with his parents.
Then, once Harry seemed somewhat convinced that he should not believe his father’s lies, they moved the conversation to what to do next. Once again, Peter let them talk without intervening. Harry agreed to let the Stark’s lawyer look into ways to legally shut Norman Osborn up to make him stop talking about Harry and seek compensation for the damages he had caused. Peter’s mother was also going to have a statement published defending Harry’s and the Stark’s honour. The details of that were yet to be figured out, but she assured Harry he would be able to read it before publication and veto anything he did not like. That seemed to really make him feel more at ease, as Peter had watched his shoulders drop and he had even let out a sigh. With a plan put in place on how to deal with the damages caused by the interview and with Harry, hopefully, feeling better, the phone call ended and, soon enough, Harry was in Peter’s arms again.
Notes:
The chapter's title is, of course, a quote from the one and only J. Jonah Jameson from the Rami trilogy.
Chapter 38: I can't...
Notes:
This fic turns one year old today! Woohoo! I started writing it well over a year ago, but I have been posting it for what is now a year. So, today is the fic's first AO3 anniversary or whatever you want to call it.
I was planning on posting this chapter on Sunday as I am trying to get back to the weekly posting schedule, but life happened and I did not finish proofreading the chapter until yesterday. Then, since we were only a day away from the fic's anniversary, I figured that I might as well just wait that extra day and post it as a way to somewhat celebrate that.
I hope you guys can forgive me for daring to wait a day to post the chapter, lol (and also for what comes next).
Chapter Text
It did not take long for things to go to shit again: just less than two weeks, or a week and three days to be exact. It was a shame, really, as things had been going relatively well considering the circumstances. Indeed, Harry had recovered much quicker this time. He was still not in the best mood ever, obviously, and was still struggling to go outside, but he was managing to go to lectures without too much coaxing from Peter and when he was inside he was mostly normal. They even had started to be intimate again. Peter’s injuries had been mostly fading, only leaving marks he could easily explain away as him being careless from having too much on his mind which made him bump into things more. This might have also been helping Harry feel better, as he did not have to worry about Peter’s body image as much. It surely made him fall asleep much quicker whenever he was cuddled against Peter’s bare chest, looking so peaceful. The only thing that seemed off when it came to Harry, other than his nervousness when he had to go outside, was how Peter would sometimes find him staring at nothing. Peter would assume that it meant that Harry had gotten lost in his thoughts whenever he noticed him doing it. Harry would mostly do it when they were at Peter’s flat, which was where they were most of the time as he had basically moved in again, but Peter had also seen him do that during classes. Luckily, all that Peter needed to do to ground him again was to gently take his hand, and soon enough it would be as if nothing had ever been wrong. Harry would always tell Peter he was fine when Peter would ask, so Peter figured he just wanted some privacy about his thoughts, which was fine. It would be hypocritical of him to demand to know everything Harry thought about.
Peter had met with Gwen again the Friday after the hit piece had come out. He had had to use the excuse of needing a walk to clear his head and had set a timer on his watch to make sure he was not gone so long it would be obvious that he was doing something else than walking around. Harry’s persistent distaste for being out in public had been useful, even if Peter did not like admitting that, as he had not tried to offer to go with him on the walk. It had been a challenge to keep the meeting with Gwen somewhat short when they had so many important things to go over and when Peter could not tell her why he was such in a hurry. However, Peter had managed it because he had to. He had felt a bit guilty, though, when he had come home to Harry already in bed, waiting for him to go to sleep. That guilt had been quickly pushed to the side when Harry had fallen asleep looking oh so safe in his arms, reminding Peter why he was doing all of this. He had told himself that, soon, he would break into the lab and eliminate any threat to Harry before he ever got back there.
So, to say that Peter had felt blindsided when Harry had announced he was going back to the lab whilst putting his shoes on and grabbing his coat was quite the understatement.
“What do you mean you’re going to the lab?!” Peter asked.
He was standing next to Harry, watching him with wide eyes. They just had dinner. After dinner, they would normally now study for a bit, then watch a Doctor Who episode before finally getting ready for bed. That was what they would do, every night, unless they were too tired for Doctor Who, then they would watch a less complicated show that Harry had picked. Thus, Harry could not go to the lab, it was time to study, and Peter had not broken inside the lab yet to stop whatever they were doing in there. Harry was too early, he had to wait, he had to wait for Peter to break in and then he would not go back anyway.
“I’ve been thinking, since the phone call with your parents,” Harry said, looking at his coat’s sleeves. “They’re right, I should not let my father define me. I need to prove my own worth. So, I contacted Dave.”
Fucking Dave was involved, of course, he was. Had Harry really been the one reaching out to him, or had Dave contacted Harry? They must have wanted Harry back for some reason, and sent Dave to convince him to come back! No, that was silly, why would they need Harry back? Well, was it silly? Harry was really smart and they had seen his work. Peter’s head was spinning, he could not tell which of his thoughts were rational and which were brought up by the rising panic he was experiencing.
“They’re still willing to let me go back to my original job, despite the article,” Harry continued, as if he had not noticed that his boyfriend was moments from falling onto the floor. “I’ll get to show that my father lied, that I’m not completely useless, and I’ll also be able to contribute. The pay is not much, but at least it will also show to your parents that I don’t plan on being a freeloader.”
Harry put on his coat as Peter had to put his hand against the wall to stabilize himself. He had so many thoughts crashing into one another, somehow sucking all the oxygen from his lungs.
“But you can’t go back…” Peter fought to say, his heart beating so hard in his throat making it difficult to speak.
It was true, Harry could not go back. He could not go back now, he had to wait, he had to wait for Peter to make sure he was safe. It did not make sense for him to go back to the lab tonight, so why was he going back? Why was he doing this to Peter?
“What do you mean I can’t go back?”
Harry had now his coat on and was staring at Peter. His eyebrows were furrowed and his gaze was strange. Why was he looking at Peter like that?
“It’s too early, I –”
“Why are you the one to decide if it’s too early?” Harry cut him off. “Don’t you trust that I’m able to tell what is good?”
Was Harry angry at him? He had not raised his voice, but Peter could tell he was annoyed. That was not Peter’s goal, he did not want to make Harry angry, he just wanted to protect him.
“I do, I –”
It was as if something was pushing the words back into Peter’s mouth. He had his mouth opened, but no sound was coming out of it anymore. No, no, no, everything was wrong, all of this could not be real, it was not supposed to be how things went, it was not how Peter had planned for things to go.
“So what’s the issue? If you trust me to make my own decisions, then why are you trying to tell me what I can and cannot do?” Harry asked with his arms crossed on his chest and as he kept on staring at Peter.
Peter opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. It felt like his soul had become a collapsing black hole and everything was still spinning.
“I don’t say anything when you disappear on your walks,” Harry pointed out.
Had Harry become suspicious of Peter’s walks? Was it why he was going back to the lab? But Peter had done his best, he had done everything he could to not make his meetings with Gwen seem weird, so why was Harry doing this? Peter’s breathing suddenly stopped, and he had to use his sticking abilities on the wall to not completely crumble down.
“Why can’t you support me on this, Peter?”
Harry’s expression had changed. His eyebrows were not furrowed anymore, they were slightly raised instead. His eyes were widder and his arms were now hanging on both sides of his body.
“I’m trying to do what’s right for me, so why can’t you be supportive?” Harry asked, his voice breaking slightly. “All I want you to be is supportive.”
But Peter could not be supportive, not of this. He had to protect Harry, this was his one and only goal, and being on board with him going back to the lab would be in direct contradiction with that. How Harry was looking at him made him feel tempted to just lie, to pretend, to just be whatever Harry wanted him to be, but he could not.
“I can’t…”
Forcing those words out felt like trying to rip one of your own organs out. Peter just wanted to crawl onto the floor. Harry looked at him as he felt his lungs start to burn. For a second, Harry’s eyes were harder than they had ever looked when focused on Peter, but then, they became black holes. Black holes that Peter felt desperate to reach towards.
“Very well. Let me know when you’re ready to talk and be supportive,” Harry said, turning around towards the door. His voice might have been completely void of emotions, but it was so painful for Peter to hear Harry talk like that. “I’ll get my things during your afternoon class, tomorrow.”
Harry opened the door and Peter wanted to grab onto him, try to stop him from leaving, tell him to just give him a couple of days and Peter would talk, and beg him to stay, but instead, he stayed silent and frozen. It was only when the door closed that Peter fell onto the floor, gasping for air. He could not believe what was happening. The suddenness of it was still preventing his brain from processing it. He had to pull himself together, though, he had to find a way to protect Harry. Could he reveal to him what was going on? Harry might not believe him, he seemed to have already formed in his head a narrative about what was happening. It might also put him in more danger. Harry might try to figure out if Peter was telling the truth, or if Peter showed him his powers he might completely freak out and do something not rational. Peter also did not want to show him his powers as Harry would get mad. He would absolutely get mad at Peter for hiding them from him for so long. Could Peter physically stop Harry from going back to the lab? He could probably overpower him and he could tie him up and… no, that was crazy, Peter was going insane.
Only when Peter tried to take deep breaths, hoping it would help him to get his thoughts under control, did he realise that he had been hyperventilating. No wonder his brain had been going nuts, he really needed to calm down. How would usually Gwen manage to calm him down? Right, Gwen, Gwen was smart, Gwen could help. Wait, could they not just move when they were supposed to break in? Yeah, that was it, that was how Peter was going to protect Harry. If Harry did not want to wait for Peter to be ready, then Peter would just go in with whatever semblance of a plan he had. Peter still needed Gwen’s help to break into the lab, though. The suit was stashed at her place to remove the risk of Harry stumbling upon it, and so was all the tech and stuff they had made for the break-in.
Being in such a rush to see Gwen, Peter nearly forgot to grab his keys before running out of the door. He then ran the entire way, either forgetting to hide his abilities or not caring enough to. As soon as he got to her building, he started ringing her through the buzzer, pushing the button again and again. He only stopped when it hit him that, somehow, he was in the inverse situation he had been in the morning of the hit piece. Instead of being the person in the flat, unaware of what was going on, he was the one losing his mind, desperate to see the other person. The situations were quite different, though. Harry had been able to share what was going on exactly with Peter, but Peter had been, so far, careful to hide Harry’s existence from Gwen. Should he keep doing that? Gwen might not understand the urgency of the situation if he did not tell her that Harry was in danger, but she might want to use him if she knew about him. Worst, she might decide that Peter was not mentally and emotionally stable enough to go into the lab if she saw him like this and knew how desperate he was to protect Harry. Yes, he could try to go solo, to not rely on her for help, but he needed her. What would Peter do if he got another panic attack while looking around for proof without Gwen there able to calm him down? Peter did not get the time to think about that too much as the door buzzed open. He took a deep breath and stepped inside. He was going to calm the fuck down, not mention Harry and make up a reason for why they needed to break into the lab asap. He really hoped he could manage to come up with a convincing enough lie.
“Can you tell me why on earth you were ringing my door as if you had been shot or something?!”
Gwen had let him into the flat, making him rush in and closing the door behind him, before turning to him and looking at him with wide eyes. Peter opened his mouth to speak, to explain they had to break into the lab as soon as possible, probably tomorrow when Harry would be in class and Peter would just skip his, but no sound came out. Right, he had forgotten that tiny detail.
“Are you hurt somewhere?” Gwen asked, walking towards him. “Physically hurt, I mean, because something is obviously wrong.”
Peter noticed how Gwen’s eyes were scanning his entire body, probably looking for signs of injuries. He waited for her gaze to come back to his face before shaking his head.
“Okay good.” Gwen let out a sigh of relief. “Then, let’s get you calmed down so you can explain to me what the hell is going on.”
No, there was no time for grounding techniques, even if Gwen’s would work surprisingly well. So, Peter quickly grabbed Gwen’s wrist, stopping her from moving to the couch. She looked at him and then at his hand, seemingly surprised. Peter stared back at her, also surprised by what he had just done. Why could he have not done that to Harry?!
“We’ve got – to go to the lab.”
God, that felt painful, but Peter had to push through, for Harry.
“Tomorrow,” he added.
Gwen stayed silent, her eyes again looking him up and down. Why was she doing that when Peter had told her he was not physically injured? Her eyes then darted up, looking straight into Peter’s. They felt… accusatory.
“We’re getting you calmed down before we do anything, that’s non-negotiable,” she said, maintaining eye contact. “So, let go of my hand and sit your butt down on the couch.”
Her voice had sounded harsh and thus completely different than how it normally sounded when she needed to calm him down. Had Peter managed to also mess things up with Gwen? Was he going to end up all alone? Would he be able to save Harry all alone? Not really wanting to find that out, he let go of Gwen and walked to her couch. She did the same and, in the corner of his eye, Peter saw her rub her wrist. Had he held it too tightly? Shit, he must have had. Peter sat down as Gwen did the same next to him. As she did so, Peter noticed how she put her wrist behind her back as if she was hiding it from either Peter or herself.
“You know the drill,” Gwen said. “Point at five things you can see.”
And so Peter did. Peter pointed at those five things, touched four things, and listened for three things. The ‘two things you can smell’ and ‘one thing you can taste’ were a bit more complicated, usually involving a trip to the kitchen, so they skipped it this time. Despite that, it had helped Peter calm down, so it had done its job. Talking still felt a bit too much, though, as the idea of leaving his bubble still felt like an insurmountable task to Peter. So, Gwen had started to look for another exercise, something else to help him, but Peter felt his frustration rising. They had not the time for this, for him being weak; they had to work on the break-in that had to happen tomorrow. Peter let all his frustration boil inside him until the pressure made his lid fly off:
“We need to break in and stop the lab tomorrow, we cannot wait anymore.”
Damn, he had managed a full sentence. Maybe frustration was really the key to getting him to burst his own bubble, somehow.
“Why would we do that?” Gwen asked, putting down her phone to stare at him instead.
“Because…”
Because what? What could be his reason for wanting to hurry up so badly? Fuck, he should have thought about that before rushing to come see her. Now, she was looking at him, expecting an answer, and he did not have the time to come up with a good lie.
“Because I cannot take it anymore,” Peter said, trying to sound convincing and furrowing his eyebrows. “People are probably stuck at the lab, suffering, and I’m there taking my sweet, sweet time. I’m ready, you’re ready, so we should just go for it!”
“I’m not ready,” Gwen scoffed. “We’re not ready, Peter! We can’t just change all of our plans just because you feel guilty and because you have a bit of trouble sleeping at night!”
“But we need to!”
Peter wanted to cry. He wanted to scream, he wanted to fall onto his knees, he wanted to become a ball on the floor and pretend he did not exist, that nothing existed. There was so much pressure on his shoulders, Harry’s safety depended on him, and a bunch of other people's too. He was just a guy, all he wanted was to keep Harry safe, so why had the world given so much to deal with and why was everyone working against him?!
“I just can’t anymore, I just can’t…”
His ribcage tightened again, but his eyes remained dry. He should be crying, he should be bawling his eyes out like he had done when the hit piece had come out, so why could he not and how could he be feeling so many things and nothing at the same time? All Peter could do was stare at his hands. Should they be shaking? It felt like they should be shaking, but they were just limp.
“We can move it up a few days.” Gwen spoke quietly, she was nearly whispering. “We should still be doing this during the spring break, but we can do it on the Monday instead of the Wednesday.”
Peter sensed movement but did not move. He continued staring at his hands.
“You would have to wait just four more days,” Gwen continued.
She did not sound annoyed. No, she was using her soothing voice. Peter looked up at her. She was looking at him, leaning slightly towards him, with her eyebrows slightly raised and with her eyes searching for something in Peter’s. She felt… safe, the same way Peter’s family would feel safe when the outside world was too much. Would she hug Peter if he asked her to? No, Peter could not ask her that, even if he really needed someone to hug him right now; they were not close like that.
“Can you do that, Peter?”
Could he? The question was not whether he could wait those four days or not, it was if Harry could. It would be four days during which he would be at the lab’s mercy. He would probably not go to work on all four of those days, so it would be even less than that. Peter still did not like the idea of waiting; he just wanted to go in and make sure his boyfriend was safe, no matter the cost, but he knew that was not realistic. Gwen would not let him do that. She was already compromising, she was already doing her best to be understanding despite not even knowing the real cause of Peter’s worries. Thus, Peter did not really have a choice.
“I…” Peter swallowed his saliva, his words getting choked up again. “I’ll wait four more days.”
Chapter 39: One, two...
Notes:
Content Warnings
Mentions of panic attacks and of trying to fight them.
Imprisonment
From "What was the point of a room that big?" to "Peter gasped at the bright light, quickly covering his eyes"
Minor mention of self-harm
From "It reminded Peter of what would happen" to "What was that part of the brain called again"
Vague mentions of injuries, _very_ vague mention of body horror
From "They were in that same hospital gown as Wade" to "Not allowing his eyes to wander across the room any longer"
From "As Peter turned in head yet again" to "Peter jumped back, jumping further than he had meant to"
Chapter Text
The window turned out to be higher than Peter thought it would be. It was a good thing he could easily climb up walls now as this was his way in. Gwen had explained that that window would never completely close, making it always a bit too cold during the winter. She had complained about it, multiple times, but nothing had ever been done. Thus, they were hoping that the window had been forgotten about since she was not there anymore to complain about it. It was a bit of a gamble, as they were banking on the lab being negligent, but they also had a backup plan. Or more like a bunch of backup plans. After the fight with Harry, Peter had basically been either in class or at Gwen’s going over the plans. They had gone over them so many times that Peter was pretty sure that if he was to pass out, his body would be able to execute the plan without needing the help of his conscious mind. It was reassuring, though, knowing the plans so well, especially when there was a real chance he would freak out once inside the lab and lose his ability to think rationally. Indeed, he would not have to think, just to blindly follow what he had learnt by heart. It had also kept him busy, not giving him the time to lose his mind over the fact that Harry was working at the lab again. He would have probably spent his days curled up on his bathroom floor if he had not had classes and Gwen. Peter had not really seen Harry since their fight as he had not shown up for their shared classes. Peter would have worried about that, scared he had disappeared or something, but he had picked up his things at Peter’s flat whilst he was away like he had said he would. He had also clearly read Peter’s text, as he had known where to get the key, but not had replied to it. Thus, Peter figured Harry was really pissed at him and Peter gave him space, not having the bandwidth to deal with that right now.
Peter had to focus on ensuring Harry’s safety, even if it meant looking like a dick for a bit. Hence why he had just climbed up a wall and was currently sticking his fingers to the glass window. Peter wiggled the window a bit back and forth until it opened. Nice. He put his head slowly through and looked around. The lights were off, meaning Peter could not see much, but it probably meant nobody was in the room. He could not hear anything either, so it should be fine. Not wanting to let his anxiety grow more than it already had, Peter started to get the rest of his body inside. It was a tight fit as the window opening was a bit slim and the window itself did not open very much. It now made sense why they had not been so particularly worried about the window not shutting properly, especially when it was this high up.
Peter made it through, sticking to the wall on the other side, but not without grimacing. He might be more flexible now but that did not mean he particularly enjoyed bending in a bunch of weird ways. Still, he made it through and that was what mattered. Peter made sure to put the window back as he had found it, not wanting to give his presence away with a stupid window left open, and crawled back down to the floor. Once on the firm floor again, Peter stood up and looked around for a bit to let his eyes adjust to the darkness. Yes, he could sense things coming towards him, but he was not a bat, he did not use echolocation. It was more like he could feel the movement? Or maybe it was more the danger, as he had not sensed Uncle Rhodey seeing him and Harry kiss and would not sense Harry moving around in the kitchen, or at least not in a weird “super-power” way. He had sensed Uncle Bruce sneaking up towards him, though, and he was not a danger… Right, this was not the time to try to figure out what he could and could not sense. Peter would have plenty of time to discuss it with Gwen once he had successfully brought down the lab.
After standing in the dark for a while, unable to see anything, Peter started to feel uneasy. He felt exposed, scared that something was lurking around that he could not see but that could see him. He had his weird spidey-sense, though, he knew that if he had been wrong and there was actually something in the room, he would be able to sense it coming for him. He was not alone either, he had Gwen on comms. They had agreed that they would not talk unless it was urgent and important, as someone might hear Peter or Gwen might give an ill-timed heart attack, but Gwen was there. She had also added a tracker to his suit, a tracker that Peter had made himself and was pretty proud of how accurate, durable, and discreet it was. If anything happened, Gwen would hear and would know exactly where he was. Thus, there was nothing to worry about, Gwen was with him. The dark room still felt suffocating though, disorienting even. They really should have thought of adding night googles or something to his suit.
After taking a few deep breaths, Peter started to move. His eyes had adjusted pretty well to the darkness and he was moving slowly, using his hands to probe for any possible obstacles. He knew which way to go as he had studied the layout of the room and thus knew where the door should be. So, after probing the wall he had reached for a bit, Peter found the handle. He wrapped his hand around it and put his ear against the door, trying to listen for the noise of people. It was the middle of the night, so there should not be that many people around, but it was certainly not going to be completely empty either. After listening for a few seconds, Peter figured there was no one in the corridor and thus he should be okay stepping out of the room. He knew exactly where he was supposed to go: the third door on the left. That was where the computers containing all the experiment reports were according to Gwen. Peter tried to push down on the door’s handle, but his body did not move. It had become rigid. Okay, this was silly, he was not going to freeze up now, not when he was already inside and was going to a silly computer room. Peter shook his head, trying to snap out of it. Everything was going to be fine, he just needed to push down on the door’s handle… His hand and arm refused to move again. This was not good, really not good. Peter could feel his chest moving up and down quicker than it had been a few instants ago, its cadence accelerating at each passing moment. He did his best to ignore it, knowing that thinking about it would only stress him out even more.
Instead, Peter focused on trying to move his hand, putting all of his willpower into it, but it did not work. It reminded Peter of what would happen if you tried dipping your hand into boiling water. Your brain was designed such that it would not let you do such a thing; it would not let you actually hurt yourself like that and create that invisible force to make you freeze. Well, obviously, it did not always work, people were still able to hurt themselves, but it was still a response that your body would usually have. What was that part of the brain called again, the one responsible for this? Peter tried to think, to remember its name, as if it was going to help. Peter was pretty sure that the amygdala played a part in this. There were probably more parts of the brain involved, brains were complex things after all with a lot of connections, but Peter did not really have his phone to try to figure out exactly what was happening to him. Thus, he was going to blame the amygdala. He just needed something to blame, really, to tell it off, to convince to let him move.
“Fuck off, amygdala…” Peter mumbled.
“Sorry?” Gwen said through the coms.
Right, Gwen had heard that and definitely knew what the fucking amygdala was.
“Nothing.”
He closed his eyes and took deep breaths as he pictured himself somewhere pleasant with Harry. He was not in danger, he was okay. His body and brain did not need to react like this, he was safe. He was going to open the door and not freeze. On three: one, two, three…
Peter stumbled into the hallways. Luckily, there was still no one around. He quickly closed the door behind him and went to his left. He counted the doors, fighting the urge to do so out loud. One, two… Footsteps echoed from somewhere not too far away. Someone was coming. Without thinking, Peter rushed through the door on his left and closed it, leaning his back against it as if someone was going to try to barge through the door. As he waited, ready to keep it closed, Peter looked around. He could see pretty well, or at least better than in that first room thanks to fluorescent neons in the ceiling. The light felt cold, though, clinical in a sense. It reminded Peter of his trip to the hospital, back at the beginning of the year. It certainly did not look like the room Gwen had described. No, it was too big. It must have been that big room Peter had seen on floorplans and had questioned his utility. What was the point of a room that big? Peter soon found that out, his eyes falling onto some kinds of… glass cages? What the fuck were those?! They were neatly put in rows, filling the room. They were a bit small, with barely enough space for someone to lie down in them. There were at least nine of them, maybe more. The ones to the right of Peter were empty. Peter wondered if they had ever been filled and if so, with what? No, not with ‘what’, but with whom? The middle and left rows had people in them, actual people. Oh god, Peter had stumbled onto the room where they kept their human test subjects. He had fucked up, he had fucked so bad.
He stood, yet again frozen, his eyes locked on the person in the closest glass box. Peter did not know what he was supposed to do: run back to the hallway, go check on the people, or just pass out right then and there. That last option sounded quite tempting. He would do anything to not have to deal with what he had stumbled on, to not acknowledge it was real, but he could not do that. The person in the box moved, forcing Peter’s brain to recognise that this was really happening. The stranger was curdled up on the floor, their arms wrapped around their legs. Peter could not ignore them; only a monster would walk away without trying to help. He was so scared, though, terrified of what he might see. He was faced with the exact choice he had dreaded to find himself forced to make: was he going to protect his own mind or run the risk to shatter it further it by helping people? Peter decided to take a risk. He would not be able to see anything too messed up from where he was standing, right? Thus, he looked at the person curled up on the floor. They had a somewhat big frame, meaning they were more likely a man. They were dressed in an hospital gown, but they did not seem to have any physical injuries. Maybe the lab had not done any messed up experiments yet?
“I’ve found people,” Peter whispered to Gwen over the comms. “I’m going to see if I can help them.”
“Okay, but be careful,” she replied.
As a force of habit, Peter nodded even though Gwen could not see him, and then stepped forward into the room. It felt like walking in an upstream river, but Peter thought through it. He knew it was just his brain being weird again and that he could not let it stop him. Peter reached the glass cage and stood before it. Should he try to get the attention of the person inside? Should he just work on getting him out? He needed to see if he was in condition to be let out, if he was not going to jump at Peter or something. Thus, Peter crouched and gently knocked on the glass. The person did not move. Thinking they might have not heard him, Peter knocked again, but this time louder. The person did move, jumping to a seated position and looking at Peter with wide eyes. Wait, Peter knew that face…
“Wade?!”
“Who?!” Gwen asked.
Peter ignored her.
“Wade, I’ve been looking for you! Your… Your friend, she gave me a picture of you and…”
Wade was still looking at him with wide eyes, obviously terrified. Right, Peter was obviously wearing a weird-ass costume and Wade probably could not hear him. He did not seem aggressive, though. So, hopefully, if Peter could get him out of there he would be able to explain to him what was going on and he would not be a problem.
“I’m going to get you out of there, okay?” Peter said, exaggerating his pronunciation in the hopes that, somehow, Wade would be able to read a few words off his lips.
Peter stood up again and inspected the cage. There was some sort of door on its side with a little black rectangular box sticking out. It was probably a card reader. Peter obviously did not have a card. Maybe he could try to go find one, somehow? Unsure of what to do, he looked around. Behind him, on the row the most to the left, there was also someone in the glass cage. They were in that same hospital gown as Wade. They were rocking back in forth, with their back to Peter. Their hands were in their hair which was oddly red. A sinister thought popped into Peter’s mind, one that filled him with so much dread that he barely could formulate and that all of the muscles in his body tensed up. He had just remembered how they had organised their animal test subjects in the room he had stumbled on his first time there. They had put the most “normal” or “untouched” ones near the room’s entrance, and as Peter had kept walking in, the more bizarre and messed up the animals he had seen been. What if it was the case there? What if the people he was seeing were those “normal” or “untouched” test subjects, neatly placed the closest to the entrance, hiding the true horrors further back into the room.
Not allowing his eyes to wander across the room any longer, Peter whipped around back to Wade’s cage. Both his mind and body were screaming at him to run and not look back, making it difficult to not shake from the primal fear that had taken over him. He had to get out of there, now. He could not leave Wade behind, though. The other, yes, he did not know them, he did not know of anyone missing them, and most importantly, he did not know of the states they were in, but that was not the case for Wade.
“I’m going to do something very stupid,” Peter said in a shaking voice.
He could barely breathe, his chest felt like it was being crushed.
“What? Peter, what on earth are you…”
Peter punched the card reader with all of his strength.
Alarms went off. Peter nearly got overwhelmed by how loud they were, but he kept going, punching the black box and the cage. He knew that Gwen was very likely yelling at him and losing her mind, but he could not hear her over the alarms. The glass was starting to break, though, he could see the cracks forming. One more well-placed punch and…
Something hit Peter hard in his left shoulder, making him fly off his feet and violently crash into a wall. The right side of his body took most of the impact, but his head also hit the wall, making him yelp in pain. Peter tried to find his bearings to get on his feet again and be ready to defend himself against whatever attacked him, but his head was spinning. The alarms were still screaming into his ears, making it worse.
Peter had barely stood up again as the world had finally stopped spinning around him when he suddenly ducked. He heard something getting smashed to pieces just above him, but he could not see anything, his vision had been filled with darkness. No, it was not darkness, Peter could see light getting reflected, meaning he could actually see. It looked like some sort of black goo with grey veins running all over it. A… A thing was definitely standing in front of him. Peter rolled to the floor again, wanting to move to the side of the thing without standing up and risking getting punched. His head got flooded with pain, as if he had just hit it again and his vision got somewhat blurry. He could still make out shapes and thus see that the thing was tall, though, definitely taller than Peter. It had what looked like arms and legs, but it was definitely not human. The overall shape was wrong, it was too big. It was some sort of goo in the shape of a huge human, maybe? Peter tried to look up at its head, but the thing jumped at him again. He barely had the time to jump out of the way before the thing smashed the floor Peter had been crouched on. The thing was definitely strong, maybe stronger than Peter, but did not seem as quick as him. Jumping around made his head hurt even worse, though, and his vision had not gone back to normal completely yet. He could not keep on dodging attacks, he would probably puke and pass out if he did. He could not fight it either, though, not in the state he was currently in at least. That left him with only one option: he had to get the hell out of here. He had to get out before the thing smashed him into smithereens.
Peter could feel his thoughts getting all mixed up after jumping yet again to dodge an attack, but he did his best to focus his brain on one single word: “flee”. How was he going to do that, though? Right, the door, he needed to find the door out of there. He looked around, trying to spot the door as he was completely disoriented. He had no idea where he was. He could not see any door, but could not see the goo monster either. Where was he now in the room? As Peter turned in head yet again, something moving in one of the cages caught his eye and Peter made the grave mistake of looking at it just as his vision became clearer.
Peter nearly threw up on the spot. He quickly looked away, already trying to convince himself he had not just seen that. No, there had been nothing there, the box had been empty, completely, he had not seen that, he had not seen that… It was too late, the image was stuck in Peter’s head. He wanted to claw at his brain, make it bleed until the memory was destroyed. But he could not, especially now that the goo monster had found him and was taking another swing at him. Peter jumped back, jumping further than he had meant to, and crashing again roughly against a wall. Peter let out of painful yelp, his head feeling like it was going to explode, especially with that new horrible ringing in his ear. It made Peter grateful that the alarms were still ringing, as it somehow helped counterbalance that high-pitched sound as the alarms were in a very low frequency. So, Peter pushed through it and quickly stood back up.
He quickly searched for the thing, not wanting to be caught by surprise again. He had a feeling that, next time, he would not simply get thrown around. Peter spotted the thing between two cages. It was hard to see what was happening, as Peter’s vision had become somewhat blurry again and the world had gone back to spinning around him, but there was clearer something wrong with it. It was… shorter? As if it was crouched or something. Peter did not want to waste time trying to figure out what it was doing exactly, he had to find a way out while the thing did not look like it was about to jump at him.
Wait, he could see the cages forming three rows again. That meant Peter was either against the wall where the door was at, or at the back of the room. He looked around, figuring his vision was too blurry to see any other gruesome details again. Would it even matter, though, after what he had already seen? Feeling his head becoming too dizzy from his eyes darting from one side to another, Peter used his hands as well, feeling the wall against him. He kept slapping it, moving slowly to the side looking for the door, before feeling his hand and arm going through the wall. How was that possible? Peter waved his arm around, trying to figure that out, before it hit him: it was a hole. The monster must have punched a hole in the wall or something. It was too high and small for him to crawl through in his state, but it meant he should probably be on the correct side of the room and the door should be near. Thus, Peter kept looking, this time with more energy as the prospect of actually getting out of there had become more realistic. Finally, Peter hand’s hit what must have been the door handle. Not bothering to try to figure out if people were out there, Peter opened the door and rushed into the hallway.
Peter gasped at the bright light, quickly covering his eyes. The light was painful, stabbing him through his eyes into his head. He could not let the pain stop him, though; the goo monster could follow him into the hallway, or some scientist could come and grab him. All it would take was one well-placed syringe, and he would be out of order. Under normal circumstances, Peter would have figured that his spidey-sense would warn him if someone was about to lunge at him, even if it was just some random person with a syringe. However, right now, he was not sure he would be able to ever feel his weird tingles even if his spidey-sense worked. So, he had to push through and be quick. He remembered entering a door on his left, as the room he was supposed to go to would have been on his left. Thus, to come back to where he had come from, he would need to turn right and go down the hallway.
As he was about to head that way, Peter realised he had no idea which door he had come from relative to the room he needed to go to. He knew he had counted the doors while coming from the room with the window, but could not remember at what number he had stopped at. Furthermore, he had doubts he would be able to climb and squeeze through that window again in his state. He needed to find a new way, a better way, to get the hell out of here, but his head felt too much of a mess to think properly. He had a soft-boiled egg instead of a brain right now. A soft-boiled egg that would attack you by flashing the worst thing you had ever seen when you tried to focus a bit too much, which in turn might or might not make your body freeze again.
“Fuck it.”
He was not going to take it. He was not going to let his brain fuck him up and get him stuck here, not when Harry was still counting on him. Thus, Peter turned right and started running. He had no idea where he was going, but he knew he was going to get out of this horrible lab, no matter what it would take. He kept running the fastest he could until he reached a door. He barely slowed down, using his whole body to hopefully slam it open. The door did open, making him fall forward.
Chapter 40: Experience
Notes:
This chapter is titled after "Experience" by Ludovico Einaudi.
When I started to write this fic, my goal was to write something that would feel like this song feels: a mixture of pain and sadness, but of also hope and the comfort you find in your relationships with other people. To be alive is to having sometime suffer, but to also make meaningful connections that bring you warmth and hope, that let you see the good things that life has also to offer. Life can be a painful journey, but not one that we have to go through alone.
This chapter feels like a representation of what I have been trying to express, so I thought I would title it after this piece that played such a big part in the first rough outline of this fic.
Here is the 'version' I usually listen to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hN_q-_nGv4U
Disclaimer: What Peter thinks/believes does not necessarily reflect what I think/believe.
Content Warnings
Light mentions of injuries
Trauma (both mental and physical)
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Peter ran. He ran as fast as he could until that horrible high-pitched sound became too much to bear. He could only hear it in his left ear, but it was more than enough to make him feel like someone was sticking a thin spear in his head. He had to get rid of it, right now. Peter stopped and quickly looked around. His vision had become better, but he was still feeling somewhat dizzy and the ringing was making it hard to think. Despite that, he could clearly recognise that he had gotten out of the lab, somehow, and he seemed to be alone somewhere on campus. Thus, to try to figure out what was wrong with his ear, Peter removed his mask. As soon as he did, the ringing stopped and he groaned in relief. The silence had never sounded so good. Getting rid of that horrible sound had apparently made his dizziness go away as well. Peter could feel his body coming down from the adrenaline already, but he knew he could not let himself go, not yet. He was still in the open, he was not safe yet, especially with his face exposed like that. He had to go somewhere safe.
The logical choice would have been his flat, that was probably the safest place he could go to, but Peter could feel something bad creeping in his brain. He did not feel good, he did not feel normal. He needed… he needed comfort. But Harry would not give him comfort. Harry was mad at him, so mad that he had been ignoring Peter. It was not like Peter could have gone see him anyway, even if Harry had not been mad at him; he could not let Harry see him like this. He… he felt all wrong and Harry could not see him whilst he was all wrong. No, that would not be right. And Peter had fucked up, again. He had gone to the lab, again, and had gotten out with no proof, just more wrong. Oh god, how could Peter be so wrong? His mind was desperate for comfort and his body was begging him to just keep on running, but he had no idea where to run to. Who could he possibly let them see him like that? There was someone, actually. One person who had already seen how much of a mess he really was, the only person who had seen it. Peter ran to them.
Soon enough, Peter was being yanked into a flat. Then, arms wrapped around him, pulling him in a tight embrace.
“Oh my god, Peter, I was so scared,” Gwen whispered.
It was at this exact moment, feeling so safe in her arms, that Peter finally let his adrenaline level plummet down and let himself go. Before he knew it, tears were streaming down his face as his own arms wrapped around Gwen, desperate to find some comfort in her warmth.
“You’re okay,” Gwen said, pulling him tighter against her. “I’ve got you.”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…”
“Peter,” Gwen cut him off.
She let go of him and Peter suddenly felt scared again, as if his lifeline had been taken from him. He clung to her harder, terrified she was going to leave him all alone in the dark. Despite forcing him to let go, Gwen did not leave him. Instead, she gripped his shoulder and looked him in the eyes.
“You got out, that’s all that matters, okay?”
Peter felt his throat close up as his tears were still flowing. Not being able to say anything, he just very lightly nodded, trying to process what Gwen had said.
“Come here,” she said, resuming their hug properly.
Slowly, Gwen started to shift her weight from one side to another, pulling Peter along. It strangely reminded him of when he had danced with Harry at the gala but it felt very different. It felt extremely comforting, yes, but more in a way that his parents would make him feel safe. Peter’s mind was too much of a mess for him to try to sort through what he was feeling exactly, especially when the rocking was starting to make his head hurt like hell.
“My head…” Peter mumbled.
Gwen immediately stopped swaying around and looked at him instead.
“Did you hit your head?” she asked, the worry in her voice being so obvious it made Peter worry a bit too.
Peter had to stop and actually think about whether or not he had hit his head for a second. The events of the night were already becoming groggy, somehow.
“I did.”
He was pretty sure he had. He remembered being thrown against a wall and his head hurting badly after that. Gwen yet again unwrapped her arms from around him, but Peter knew better than to fight it, holding his breath for the questions that were about to come, and they did. Gwen quickly asked him about a variety of symptoms and Peter did his best to answer accurately.
“You probably have a least a concussion, but you could have more serious injuries,” Gwen said, her worry still very much apparent. “Your brain could be swelling, or you could also have internal bleeding in other parts of your body, and I am absolutely not qualified to deal with that. You need to go to a hospital.”
Peter’s body reacted before his mind properly did, tensing up and physically pushing Gwen away from him.
“Fuck no.”
Images of that person, of that poor person, in the hospital gown flooded his brain. All the horror he had felt seeing them was coming back, weighing down his entire body. He would not go to a hospital. No fucking way. He would fight any and everyone if he had to, but he would not go to a hospital. He would not go, he would not go, he would not…
“Okay!” Gwen exclaimed. “Okay, no hospital. I promise, no hospital, you’re going to stay right here, okay? With me, in my flat. You’re safe here. You’re in my flat and you are safe, no one is going to hurt you.”
Gwen was looking at him with wide eyes. The palms of her hands were facing Peter, a bit away from her body. Her stance was a bit wide too, but so was Peter’s, he realised. Why were they standing like that, and why had Peter had such a big reaction?
“Okay…”
Peter was not sure what was happening, but he knew he trusted Gwen to take care of him. Actually, he trusted her, period, he realised. He trusted Gwen. The realisation made his body relax again, his instinct to fight for his life disappearing. Gwen did not move for a few seconds as her eyes ran all over Peter’s body. She had her ‘thinking’ face on, as if she was calculating something. Maybe she was. Peter was going to have to push his anxiety about being observed in such a way and just hold onto his belief that he could trust her.
“I’m going to have to check some things and look for other injuries,” Gwen said, her eyebrows still furrowed and sounding more serious, more distant.
Knowing what that meant, Peter started to remove his suit and Gwen went to fetch whatever she needed. Peter had thought that he had gotten used to being so exposed in front of Gwen as he had stood in front of her wearing nothing but his underwear multiple times. He really had thought that he would not ever get bothered by having to do that again, but when he saw her come back with some miniature pocket flashlight, pen, and a clinical feel to her, Peter did not feel as safe as he had felt in her arms. Gwen seemed to notice it. Or, perhaps, she was being more considerate tonight after what had happened. Her touch was softer, more careful, and she was talking instead of thinking in silence. She was talking about something silly, about how she might want to adopt a cat someday, asking Peter if he liked cats too. Peter did, but he would probably get a dog if he were to adopt a pet. Harry would definitely get a cat, though.
“I want you to stay here tonight so I can keep an eye on you,” Gwen said as she stepped back, meaning that she was done examining Peter.
Peter slowly nodded, minding his head. That made sense, she probably wanted to make sure he was not going to suddenly die or something. Still, it was nice of her, especially considering that meant she would have to wake up throughout the night.
“I didn’t grab my clothes on my way back…” Peter said.
“It’s fine, I’ll let you borrow one of my pyjamas.” They were, embarrassingly, pretty similar in height and build. At least it meant Peter was not going to get strangled by Gwen’s pyjamas. “I’ll bandage your hands before you get changed so it doesn’t hurt.”
Confused, Peter looked at his hands. They were in bad shape, with obvious open wounds, but Peter could not see any blood on them. There must had been blood since there were wounds. Gwen must had cleaned the blood and had probably disinfected the wounds as well but Peter had not noticed it. Hell, he had not even noticed the pain until now. It was like that time he had damaged his boxing teacher’s wall. Peter really should be more careful with that kind of thing, what if one day he got a more serious injury and just did not notice it? Like when he had gotten cut during his first vigilante night, what if he had not noticed he was bleeding? This could prove to be bad.
“I’m just going to take your hands…” Gwen said as she delicately took one of his hands and started to bandage it.
Peter let her and watched as she then moved to his other one. Once she was done, she quickly disappeared into her mini-hallway. Peter kept staring at his now bandaged hands. It looked ugly, but at least his knuckles would be well protected.
“Here you go. I’ll let you get change.”
Peter looked back up to what must have been the promised pyjamas laid down on the table and saw in the corner of his eyes Gwen disappeared into the kitchen.
Eager to not be half naked anymore, Peter put the pyjamas on. Gwen definitely had good taste in pyjamas, Peter had to give her that. They were comfortable as they were quite loose and the fabric they were made of felt great against Peter’s skin. After fighting in a skin-tight suit and getting examined while only wearing underwear, wearing those pyjamas felt quite good. It did not feel as good as wearing Harry’s jumpers, though. Peter suddenly felt overwhelmed, needing so badly to be hugged by Harry. Peter quickly pushed those feelings down; he had just cried already, and he did not want to cry again. Just the thought of crying again felt too exhausting. Instead, he sat on Gwen’s couch, with his legs folded in front of him, and waited for her to come back. When she did, Peter noticed she was carrying two mugs.
“I made myself some coffee, so I don’t sleep through the night and forget to check up on you,” she explained as she sat down the mugs on the coffee table. “and some tea for you.”
Tea was a nice surprise as it would always help him relax. Thus, Peter eagerly started to trace the sides of the cups with his fingers, looking for warmth without wanting to burn himself. Peter liked the texture of the cup: it was smooth, making it easy to run his fingers over the surface. It smelt also quite good, kind of fruity. The smell was familiar, Peter felt as if he should be able to easily recognise it, but his brain was blanking.
“I shouldn’t call this a tea when it’s an infusion,” Gwen said, breaking the silence that had started to set. “Tea might prevent you from sleeping when you really need to rest.”
Peter frowned. He remembered a conversation they had had during one of Gwen’s examinations after a vigilante night. She had made herself a strong cup of coffee and Peter had complained, saying he strongly disliked the smell of coffee. It had led to a conversation about hot beverages during which Gwen had basically said she did not get the hype behind them and that she would only drink coffee for its caffeine. That then raised two questions: why could he barely smell the coffee she was currently drinking and why did she had some tea infusion when those things did not give any caffeine? Peter decided to focus on the latter.
“I thought you did not like infusions?” Peter pointed out without looking up from his cup over which his fingers were still running.
“I don’t. But you do,” Gwen replied.
She had said that in a very matter-of-fact way, as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Peter was pretty sure it was not. Gwen had bought infusions specifically for him. Peter pondered what that meant and started to form a hypothesis in his mind, taking into account other things he had noticed. The hypothesis felt silly, though, and he did not have the energy to try to examine it in his mind or test it, so he decided to leave it at that.
As he let the warmth and the smell of the infusion calm him down, Peter started to slowly feel normal again, as if he had not been fighting for his life earlier that night. It was not right, thought. Peter should not feel somewhat okay and start to think about other things, not after what he had seen, and especially not after discovering there were actually people stuck in the lab. It was not fair towards them that he got to wear comfy pyjamas and enjoy some nice infusion when they were suffering. It just was not. Peter might have been physically, and probably mentally, unable to run right back to the lab to save those people, but he could still plan Gwen’s and his next move. He had no reason to not be currently doing that. Hell, he should have started as soon as he had set foot in Gwen’s flat.
Instead, he was being so selfish, drinking stupid tea. Gwen must had been dying for him to finally spit out what had happened too, so she could start planning their next step. Peter should have thought of that as well, he was being rude by making her wait like this.
“I…” Peter gripped his mug. He did not want to talk about this, he really did not want to, but he had to. “So…”
He was not sure where to start, what part was the most important one, and what part would let him actually speak.
“I went…”
Why could he not speak? He had to speak.
“I went into…”
He had to, he had to, he had to.
“Into…”
Weak, he was so weak, he was so, so, very weak. He had no right to be weak, though, not when there were people who were suffering, waiting for him. He had only seen stuff, that was nothing! How pathetic did you have to be for being that affected by having seen stuff?!
“Into…”
“Peter.”
He nearly hurt his neck looking so quickly towards Gwen. She had her eyes fixed on him and he found himself pulled by them, looking straight back into them. They were painful to look at, but Peter was unable to divert his gaze.
“Don’t force yourself. We’re not going to do any planning tonight.”
Her voice had the same warmth that Peter had felt during their hug, making him desperately want to cling to it. Gwen had always seemed cold and distant. However, now, Peter was wondering if it was because Gwen had actually been cold and distant, or if it was because he had been refusing to see any of the warmth she had.
“You care about me,” Peter stated.
The pieces had fallen too neatly into place for Peter to not speak his conclusion.
“I do.”
It was such a simple reply, consisting of only two words, but they meant so much and had so much sincerity in them. Peter would not dare to question them.
“You trust me?” Gwen asked as her eyes searched Peter’s for something.
“Yes,” Peter realised.
Gwen must had found whatever she had been searching for as her eyes dropped down to Peter’s hands. Instinctively Peter did the same and saw that he had been tightly holding his cup. It was a miracle he had not broken it. As Gwen gently placed a hand over Peter’s, he let go of the mug, letting it rest on the table. Gwen’s hand did not move, though.
“Good, it means you’re not a complete idiot,” she said in a deadpan voice that had a hint of something else. Peter liked it, it reminded him of his family’s bickering.
“Right,” he snorted.
It was strange, now that Peter had learnt to see Gwen’s warmth, that was all he could see. Gwen removed her hand, leaving Peter feeling cold despite resting on a hot cup. She then reached for her own beverage and started to carefully drink it. Peter could still smell the coffee a bit, but its smell was definitely not as strong as what it had been that other day. Peter wondered if he should thank Gwen, as she was basically going to stay up all night to monitor his health, hence the coffee. That idea felt weird, unnatural for them, despite their heart-to-heart. Thus, Peter stayed silent and waited for his infusion to cool down a bit more before drinking it.
The infusion had definitely some red fruit flavour. Either strawberry or raspberry, but Peter could not tell which. As he drank, he felt his body slowly become jelly. Bringing his cup up to his lips felt harder and harder after each sip. He was exhausted, he realised. His body hurt and all he wanted was to curl up in a ball under a warm blanket.
“I think I’m done with the tea. Sorry,” Peter said, feeling guilty at the idea of wasting something Gwen had bought specifically for him.
“It’s okay,” she quickly replied. “You need to rest. You’re going to sleep in my bed, I don’t want you falling off the couch and hurting yourself even more. You already have more than enough injuries, I don’t want you to get any more that I’ll have to look after as well.”
It made Peter feel a bit babied and thus want to snap back he was not going to fall off the couch, that he knew how to sleep on a couch, and that he had already done so after all at Harry’s place. However, the idea of sleeping in a bed instead of on a couch sounded way too divine. Thus, Peter kept his mouth shut.
“I’ll show you the bedroom.”
Gwen stood up and so did Peter, grimacing as his back still hurt like hell. Gwen had a point, after all, he too definitely did not want to fall on his already sore back. Peter followed her out of the living room, into her mini-hallway and up to the last door in it. She opened it and stepped inside, but Peter stopped at the door frame.
Gwen had not turned on the light yet. Some of the light from the hallway did shine a bit into the room, but it was still mostly dark. Peter did not like that. Thus, he waited at the door frame until Gwen turned on a lamp on a bedside table. The room was not that big. It actually felt a bit cramped with the bed and the dresser in it. There were signs of Gwen everywhere: books, clothes, and other random things. It felt lived-in, warm, and safe. Peter liked that much better.
“Okay, I’m going to let you get settled in and get some sleep,” Gwen said, turning back towards Peter. “I will have to wake you up to check up on you during the night. How should I wake you up?”
Peter understood why Gwen had to ask him that: they did not want Gwen startling Peter too much and him either hurting himself or Gwen. Peter thought about it a bit before looking up. There was a lamp bulb in the ceiling, meaning there was a ceiling light. Peter was already planning on not turning off the lamp on the bedside table as the idea of lying in the dark felt terrifying, but it was not that bright. He would definitely notice if someone turned on the big light.
“You can turn on the light.”
Gwen nodded, probably appreciating being given an option where she could stay a safe distance from Peter. Peter did not blame her, though. He, too, would want to be far away from himself if he were to get startled.
“I’ll be in the living room,” she said as she walked back to the door. Peter had to step aside to let her get out of the room. “Come find me if you need anything or if something is wrong, okay?”
“Okay.” Peter nodded.
Then, she left the room, leaving Peter alone in it. It felt strangely empty now. Peter looked around a bit again, analysing Gwen’s belongings. They really did feel right. He then slipped into the bed. Gwen had already opened it for Peter, it seemed. Or she had never closed it, he was not sure which, he had not been paying enough attention to her. Lying in the bed felt awkward, as if Peter was not really supposed to be in it, probably because he was not. The pillow was firm, but not so firm that it was uncomfortable. Peter liked firm pillows anyway. Being under a nice and warm comforter felt great. It reminded Peter of Gwen’s hug. That made sense, somewhat, as it was her comforter after all.
Despite feeling exhausted, Peter did not feel ready to close his eyes and sleep. Instead, he stared at the bedside table on which the lamp was sitting. He knew he might dream of what he had seen tonight as he knew that was how the brain would process things, or at least he was pretty sure it was how it worked. Peter did not want to have nightmares. It would probably stress Gwen even more and she did not deserve that when she was doing her best to take care of Peter when no one else could. Thus, Peter started replaying the events of the night in his head, over and over again. It was as if they were just a story, some scary movie he had watched before going to bed. Over and over again, he saw those horrible injuries, that goo monster, and Wade. They started to feel oh-so distant. It was not like a movie he had just seen anymore, but more like a book he had read weeks ago. Over and over again, he forced them to play in his mind until he felt too exhausted to. As he closed his mind, there was nothing for his brain to think about or play for him. All that was left was a vague sense of distance. Peter welcomed it and fell asleep.
Notes:
Not going to lie, this chapter was _so fun_ to proofread! (/s)
Chapter 41: It's okay
Chapter Text
It took Peter a few days to feel somewhat okay again. On the other hand, it took Gwen nearly a week to stop acting as if Peter might suddenly die from an injury she had somehow missed. Peter had tried pointing out how unlikely that was with how much Gwen had been examining and monitoring him, but it had not helped. Thus, Peter had a feeling that Gwen’s anxiety was not only because of his physical health, especially as he would sometimes catch her observing him with her eyebrows furrowed. However, Peter did not really want to think about why Gwen might be so worried. It would probably be too much for him to handle. So, Peter had done his best to ignore her weird looks, which were pretty frequent as he had actually been staying mostly at her flat, feeling safe there. He had only gone back to his flat to get a few things, including some of the jumpers Harry had thankfully left behind. He had been wearing them more often than not. He had also started sleeping on the couch once Gwen had decided it was safe enough for him to do so, probably being sick of him stealing her bed.
Gwen had been quite busy, though. Indeed, Peter had managed to tell her about what had happened during the breaking the morning right after it, allowing her to plan for what to do next. Talking about the night’s events had been strange. He, and probably Gwen, had expected himself to freak out like he had done so every time he had had to talk about the first break-in. However, he had not. Instead, it had felt like when he had replayed the night’s event before going to bed: distant, as if it had not happened to him but was simply a movie he had watched. Talking about it had not felt that real either. It had been like his body was doing the talking whilst his mind was in its safe bubble he would usually reach by not talking. How it had felt did not really matter, though. What did matter was that he had managed to give Gwen all the information she needed and she could now spend her days working on things.
She would not share what she was working on with Peter, however, saying he needed to rest and recover. It felt horrible to be waiting around and not doing anything. Peter wanted to go out and fight again, find a way to free the people he had seen, but Gwen had struck those plans down. They had had a heated conversation about it, ending up practically screaming at each other. Despite now knowing that she cared about him, Peter’s brain had a tough time seeing her go from ‘taking down the lab at all cost’ to ‘I will not be responsible for your death’. She had actually explicitly told Peter that he would die if he was to go back now. She had told him that he would not get caught, he would simply and painfully die, and that she would never forgive him for it. She had seemed ready to actually fight him and, despite his superpowers, the look in her eyes had made him feel like it would have been no easy fight. Thus, Peter had backed down and let her work on healing him fully and coming up with a plan, as he did his best to not get eaten alive by guilt.
When Gwen had stopped monitoring his health so much, Peter had taken it as a sign that she might let him get involved again soon and knew he had to text Harry soon. What Gwen had told him about fighting that monstrosity had still been ringing in his ears and festering in his brain. It had made him realise he needed to fix things with Harry, somehow. Peter obviously did not want to start thinking about grim things, especially since Gwen would probably kick his butt if she found out, but at the same time, seeing what he had seen in that lab and her words had forced him to try to process some stuff. He knew he would do anything in his power to not end like that guy he had seen. Anything but this. Please.
The text had been short and kind of stupid, a ‘hope you’re okay’, but it had been all that Peter’s brain had been able to formulate. Harry had not replied. Of course he had not, he was still waiting for Peter to apologise. Apologising had been hard. Apologising meant pretending to not have seen images that were now stuck in Peter’s mind. Apologising meant refuting the horror Peter had felt in there and that was still following him, sticking to his skin like the gross goo that monster had been covered in. Despite all of that, Peter had apologised. He had done his best to rationalise it. They had clearly succeeded in creating their monster, so that should keep them busy for a while and Harry would be safe as long as he did not snoop around. On top of that, talking to Harry again would allow Peter to keep an eye on him and thus know if he started to have any dangerous suspicions. It had then taken Harry a few hours to reply, but, this time, he had replied: ‘it’s okay’. Getting the tiniest of shreds of attention from Harry had made Peter want to ask to meet so he could wrap his arms around Harry and make everything disappear around them, but Peter was scared. He was scared to let Harry see him like this, even though both his mental and physical health had improved. He was also terrified that Harry might decline. If he did, what would Peter do? It was okay, though, Peter would be able to see him and talk to him during the classes they shared, right?
No, not really actually, as Harry had skipped their shared lectures during the two days following the end of Spring Break. It stung, a lot. Peter had not been sure what to do: he had apologised and said he was wrong, what else did Harry want from him? Whatever it was, Peter would do it, Harry just needed to let him know what it was.
Then, on Friday, Harry finally showed up to class. Peter was been so relieved and happy to see him that he had nearly run up to him. The only reason he had not is because seeing Harry’s eyes so empty had made him freeze. It had felt like a gut punch seeing him like this. Peter had to fight his own mind so he would not be transported back to the first few days after Harry had been cut off from his father. Harry had looked tired too. Peter probably had looked as tired and some selfish part of him was nearly comforted by the idea that Harry had been having trouble sleeping without his boyfriend too.
After having recovered from seeing Harry in such a state, Peter had started walking towards him at what was, hopefully, an appropriate pace. Harry was sitting at his usual seat, aka right next to Peter’s usual seat, so Peter took that as Harry being okay with them sitting together. As Peter got closer, Harry finally noticed him as his eyes landed on him and their emptiness was quickly hidden by a more lively expression on his face. He still seemed off, not seeming as warm as he usually did, but he looked somewhat okay.
“Hi, Pete.”
Harry had spoken in a much quieter voice than usual, but just hearing Harry say his nickname nearly made Peter cry with pure relief. He had just missed it so much.
“Hi,” Peter quickly replied, sitting down next to Harry.
Peter could not mess this up. This was their first time talking since their fight, he had to make sure Harry was not going to leave him again.
“I’m sorry,” Peter started. “You were right, I should be more supportive, and…”
“Peter,” Harry interrupted. His eyes stared into Peter’s, which made Peter instinctively hold his breath as he waited for Harry’s judgement. “Please don’t. It’s okay.”
“Okay…”
They stared at each other for a moment. Peter was still trying to figure out what was happening and what he was supposed to do as Harry's eyes seemed to pierce through him again. Finally, Harry moved, breaking the illusion that the moment had somehow stopped time. Harry’s hand slid next to Peter’s and before Peter knew it, they had their fingers intertwined. Harry’s grip was strong, but so was Peter’s. When their professor walked in, neither Peter nor Harry let go. For a moment, Peter thought, or rather hoped, they would stay like this for the entire class. It turned out to only be wishful thinking as Harry removed his hand to start typing to take notes on what the professor was saying. As Harry let go of Peter’s hand, a painful cold wave hit Peter. Luckily, warmth quickly found him again as Harry’s knee bumped into his, pressing against it. Peter pressed back. He had really needed this.
Peter rode the high of having been touched by Harry all day. Even as he put on his suit he kept on remembering how Harry’s leg had felt against his. For the past few days, Peter had been going back outside as Spider-Man ever since classes had started again and Gwen had cleared him. She had not finished working fully on whatever she was working on, but she needed him to go out and attempt to test out some stuff and get more data for her. By that, she had meant that she needed him to swing around town, acting as bait and hoping the goo monster would show up so that Peter could learn more about it. Lovely stuff indeed. So far, the thing had not shown up again. Peter and Gwen had formed a few hypotheses about it. They ranged from the goo monster having been too hurt somehow during its fight with Peter, to the lab scientist not wanting to let it out of the lab yet, either because they could not control it well enough or because they wanted to keep it a secret. At least, Peter was doing something and was not completely useless anymore. Furthermore, after being touched by Harry, Peter felt even more determined to take down that thing. So, Peter went out there.
He was currently jumping from building to building in that very same neighbourhood where he had had his first superhero outing. They had figured that they had the most chances to get the thing to come out somewhere the lab had gotten already familiar with. The neighbourhood in which the lab had found their test subjects had thus seemed their best bet. As Peter started to wonder if they had somehow been wrong about that, as the goo monster had still yet to come out, an image flashed in his mind. Peter stopped running and focused on quickly distancing himself from it and pushing it down, just like he had done so countless times already. Once that was done, he got back to jumping around again, enjoying that sensation of flying. It was a shame the buildings were not that tall around there, he would have loved trying to swing from them. It would probably be so freeing, even more similar to flying. He would have to try that one day, just not today.
As time went on, Peter started to relax. He would usually start off all paranoid, terrified to be caught off guard by the goo monster, but then he would get bored or enjoy his freedom a bit too much and he would lower his guard. It was probably not smart, but he could not help it, it was hard to stay paranoid for hours on end when nothing would ever happen.
Becoming so relaxed nearly made Peter miss the fact that the hair on the back of his neck had suddenly stood up. Not having the time to try to figure out what was the danger, or where it was coming from, Peter ducked. A gush of wind hit him as something flew over him. He quickly looked around, trying to see where the thing that had jumped over his head now was. His heart dropped to his stomach as his eyes fell onto black goo. It had a somewhat human form again, but it was still way too big to actually look like on properly, and it was standing on a nearby rooftop. Had it jumped over him and onto that rooftop?! How the fuck had it done so without Peter noticing something running towards him?! Peter did not get the time to figure that one out, as he got distracted by the thing’s face. It was dark outside as the sun had set hours ago but there was still enough light from the streets to reveal that something was shining on the thing’s face. It was not just one thing shining, actually, but a bunch of little things that had the form of… They were teeth. This thing had the sharpest teeth Peter had ever seen; it would probably be able to easily cut off his arm, or any other of his limbs for that matter.
“It’s here, it’s…”
Peter jumped back as the thing jumped onto the rooftop he was on. He nearly screamed seeing those horrible teeth snap at the air just a few centimetres away from him. Fuck no, he needed to get away from that thing right now. Peter could not fight a thing like that, he had to run away!
“It’s here?!” Gwen repeated back to Peter through their com. “Turn on the device, Peter! Turn it on right now!”
The thing moved again and Peter had to throw himself to the side to avoid an oversize fist that turned into some sort of giant spear. Oh, so the goo could reshape its limbs to better hurt Peter, how lovely! That went really well with his already deadly strength and teeth!
“Activate it now!” Gwen yelled into his ears.
He was trying, for fuck’s sake, but the thing kept going at him, either trying to hit him with its stretching limbs or to take a good bite off him. Peter was too busy jumping around to avoid getting injured to turn on the device. He needed to get away from the goo monster so he would get the few seconds he needed to turn the device on. As he kept on dodging the thing’s attack, Peter tried to look around. He spotted a building taller than the others not too far away. With his usual flick of the wrist, Peter shot his web and pulled. As soon as he had a hand and his feet stuck to the wall, his other hand reached for the device he was wearing on his side. He pressed it until his finger found the button.
“Got it!” Gwen said. “Now, stay close to it and let me know if anything happens.”
Staying close to the goo monster was going to be the easy part as it was jumping from building to building, going straight towards Peter. No, what was going to be more difficult was to not let the thing kick his ass, especially with that horrible high-pitch noise coming from Gwen’s device.
As the goo monster got closer, Peter decided to try something. He once again shot a web, but this time at the monster and did not sever it from his wrist. He had never tried to do this before, he had no idea if it would work, but he had to do something. He jumped to a nearby rooftop to the right of the monstrosity, letting his web get longer. When the monster got near him, he jumped to the right again, and again, and again, his web slowly but surely wrapping around it. Peter had no idea if his web was strong enough to hold him, but he was about to find that out. As he kept going, he noticed that the thing was starting to look disoriented, as he was struggling to keep track of where Peter was. Yes, Peter was jumping again and again around him, but that thing had previously been quite fast too.
“It looks disoriented,” Peter told Gwen.
Peter also noticed that he could not hear anymore that horrible noise that Gwen’s invention had previously been making. Gwen had not said anything about turning it off, though. Was it emitting noises with a higher frequency now? That would explain why Peter could not hear it anymore. Peter felt like he was so close to figuring out Gwen’s train of thought, but knew he could not stop and actually think about it right now with the goo monster still quite close to him. Thus, he kept doing his best to wrap it around with his webs.
As he did so, the thing fell onto his knee and started thrashing around. Peter had to stop and stick his feet to a building so he would not get sent flying by the web still attached to him.
“It’s in pain, I think,” Peter said. “I’ve got it wrapped up in my web as well.”
It surely looked like it was in pain, but it also sounded like it. It was like screaming, but much, much deeper and not human sounding.
“Okay, okay, that’s good,” Gwen replied. “Try to get closer to it, I’ll put the device on max.”
Peter obeyed, walking slowly towards the end of his rooftop as he had to keep on sticking to it to not get yeeted out by the thing. As he got close to the edge, he realised he could not jump whilst holding onto his web as he would be sent flying and thus not make it to the other rooftop. So, Peter snapped off his web and stuck the loose thread to the rooftop by shooting a bunch more web at it, hoping they would be strong enough to hold it. Peter then bent his knees, getting ready to jump, but froze. He really, really, really did not want to get any closer to the thing. He was already way too close to it. His stomach had turned into a deep pit full of fear and all his instincts were telling him to run away. However, he trusted Gwen, he trusted her with his life. If she wanted him to get him closer to the monster, he would. So, Peter jumped. He landed a couple of meters away from the thing, but it was way too close to comfort for him, especially when he had seen how the thing could stretch its limbs and how sharp its teeth were.
The monster started to trash around even harder and Peter nearly found himself feeling sorry for it as it sounded in so much pain.
“It’s really hurting it,” Peter told Gwen.
As he awkwardly stood, waiting to hear back from Gwen, Peter realised he had no idea what he was supposed to do now. The thing was tied up, screaming in pain… Was Peter supposed to just watch until the sound emitted from the device somehow killed it? Did Peter want to kill it? Was that the right thing to do or would it make him no better than the lab, even worse maybe? He had not thought about that. He had been so busy trying to cope with the horrible images stuck in his head and trying to find a way to fix things with Harry that Peter had not stopped to consider what they would do with the thing if they managed to trap it. Had Gwen thought about that? If so, she had not thought it relevant to instruct Peter on what to do. Was it because she did not think they would manage to trap it, or because she already had come up with a plan she did not want to share with Peter?
“Can you try to take a sample from it? Peter? Peter?!”
Hearing Gwen speak made Peter snap out of the spiral his mind had entered, but it was too late. Lost in his thoughts, he had failed to notice how his webs were slowly snapping and how the goo monster was getting closer to his freedom by the second. So, even with his spidey-senses, Peter did not manage to move in time and got hit by the limb made of goo which was flying through the air at an incredible speed. His feet got knocked off the ground as he felt a horribly sharp pain on his side.
Peter realised he was flying through the air. Or was he falling? The pain made it hard to tell. However, he knew he had to stop himself before he would crash too hard into either a wall or the ground. He blindly shot a web, hoping it would somehow stick to something. Thankfully, it did and Peter’s course abruptly changed as he got yanked to the side.
Now that Peter could better sense in which direction he was going, he looked at what he was swinging towards and saw a wall fast approaching him. Shit. Quickly, he put his feet and free hand forward, trying to stop himself from crashing into it face-first. He violently made contact with the wall, making him cry out in pain as some more shot through his ankles and wrist. That had really hurt, but at least he did not bounce back for round two, sticking to the wall instead.
Peter did his best to breathe through the pain of both being punched by something sharp in his gut and landing so violently against the wall. He could hear Gwen screaming at him through the coms, but Peter needed a minute.
“Peter?! Peter?!” Gwen kept on yelling in his ear as the pain started to slightly subside.
“I’m okay…” he mumbled.
He was not sure he was actually okay, but he was not dead, which was pretty much where the bar was right now.
“The device is not transmitting anymore! What happened?!”
Right, the device, had it been damaged? Peter looked down to where it was supposed to be. Suddenly, it made sense why the monster had hit him exactly where he had: he had been trying to stop the device. By the looks of it and by what Gwen was saying, it had succeeded. Great, Peter was now defenceless against it. Peter needed to spot where it was before it spotted him.
“Will explain later.”
Peter quickly climbed up the wall and onto the building’s roof to look around. Everything seemed normal, right as it did before the goo monster had appeared out of nowhere. Had it run away? Why would it run away when it had managed to destroy what was harming it? Clearly, it had realised what was hurting it and had been rational enough to know how to get rid of it. That meant it could process things and think. So, why would it then just run away when it had now the upper hand? Maybe it was too hurt and needed to go heal? It being able to get hurt, not just feel pain, would be some amazing news as Peter was supposed to somehow defeat it.
Still, Peter did not want to hang around and give the monster the chance to attack him by surprise a second, or rather third, time. Thus, he started making his way to where he had hidden his clothes and belongings. His wrists and ankles were still hurting quite a bit, but at least he was still in one piece. That was no small feat after having fought that thing now twice.
“I’m coming back,” Peter told Gwen. “See you in a bit.”
When Peter got back to Gwen’s place, she confirmed it: Peter had been right. Gwen’s device had indeed been emitting very high-frequency sounds in the hopes of hurting the goo monster. That part was quite obvious, but on his way back, Peter had also managed to figure out why she had built this device. During their first fight, the thing had stopped attacking him right after Peter’s suit’s coms had gotten broken and caused that horrible high-pitched noise. Hence, it would have not been crazy to think that maybe the thing did not like high-pitched noises. Gwen had used this theory and made a device to test out what frequencies would hurt the thing the most using Peter’s observations. It was kind of embarrassing, he should have figured this out himself, especially after replaying that night in his head so many times. It seemed that his mind had been too focused on just processing what had happened, especially what he had seen, to make connections. Peter should do better. Yes, he had Gwen to help, but he still needed to pull his weight, not wait for her to figure out stuff for him. He wanted, no, needed, to be useful like that too. He needed to see that his brain could still do smart stuff like that because right now, it did not feel very smart just… just wrong. That feeling of ‘wrongness’ was still haunting him and he had to get rid of it, somehow.
For now, Peter had to push this feeling aside and instead focus on the good news: they had learnt how to hurt the good monster. They still needed to remake the device, figure out a way to prevent it from being destroyed so easily by the monster, and what to do once the monster was incapacitated. Gwen had volunteered to deal with that last part, which did not help Peter stop worrying about what she might suggest. What would he do if she actually suggested a permanent solution to this problem? Would he be horrified? Would he loudly object? Or would he understand that this might be the only solution?
Peter might not had the answers to those questions yet, but what he did know was that he should have been less distracted and gotten Gwen a sample from the monster. Indeed, maybe if they knew more about the thing, they could help it somehow? Maybe it was not too late for it, unlike that guy who… Peter quickly stopped that thought. He then formed his own plan: as soon as they would be done with that second version of the device, Peter would get back out there and get that sample for Gwen. He would then figure out what they should do once they got more information about it. Until then, Peter had to better make sure that the device would not break again and keep an eye on Harry now that they were talking again.
Chapter 42: Underneath it all, we're just savages
Notes:
Content Warnings
Major character death.
Violence, blood, injuries, broken bone (mentioned, nothing graphic)
Violence starts at “Not wasting another second, Peter activated Gwen’s device and went to work” and stops at “Peter froze. Only”
Mentions of blood, broken bones, injuries start at “The thing kept losing in volume, but Peter did not care.” ends with the chapterThreatening behavior from a men towards a woman
From “You’re not thinking straight, please…” to “Getting the atrocity to come out of hiding was easy.”
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Between trying to somewhat keep up with classes and working on making the anti-goo device unbreakable, Peter found himself with not a lot of free time. He and Gwen had built and broken so many devices as they would each time find a new flaw in their design. It made Peter antsy and he could feel his frustration building at each of their failed attempt. Ironically, it made him very good at breaking their test devices. He understood why they had to do this, that if the device was to break again during a fight, maybe the goo monster would not simply decide to run away this time. However, knowing this did not help to alleviate Peter’s feelings.
Harry did, though. Due to Peter’s lack of free time, they did not really get to spend much time together outside of class since their reunion on Friday. However, simply seeing Harry in class and texting him would still provide Peter with the warmth he desperately needed. It would also remind him why he was doing all of this. Peter knew that there was some tension still lingering between them, that Harry had not forgotten why he had been mad at him. He could feel how Harry was never fully relaxed and seemed to be performing the role of the ‘charming perfect man’ as he had been doing so when they had first met, but Peter knew better than to bring it up to him. He was very much aware of how thankful he should be that Harry was engaging with him again. Thus, Peter would focus on that instead.
Working with Gwen was not bad either, it would have probably been fun if it were not for the circumstances. Now that Peter had his defences down around her, he could really see how good of a team they made. Gwen had also seemed to develop more patience and understanding towards him as she had not commented once on his outbursts. Instead, she would gently help him calm down. It really did feel nice to have her on his side. Peter was grateful that she was here, working with him. He could not imagine dealing with this situation alone.
It had been yet again another late night of working on the stupid thing with Gwen when Peter’s phone buzzed. This was noteworthy as Peter would always keep his phone on silent to avoid notifications sounds giving him a mini heart attack. There were two exceptions to this, however. There were two things Peter had programmed to make his phone buzz no matter if his phone was set on silent or not: Harry’s texts and notifications coming from his camera. As he had planned to do so a while ago, Peter had installed a super-tiny camera to alert him if someone, or more specifically Harry, was to show up at his flat’s door unannounced. Figuring it was probably just a text, Peter quickly finished assembling the part he was working on before grabbing his phone to then see it had not been a text. No, it was a notification from the camera. Peter quickly opened it and saw Harry knocking at his flat’s door. Oh, shit.
“I’ve got to go!” Peter blurted out as he sprung up from his chair.
“What?! Why?” Gwen asked him.
Peter did not have the time to come up with an excuse; he had to run home and pretend he had been on his usual evening walk before Harry would either find it suspicious or leave.
“Sorry!” he yelled back to Gwen as he grabbed his coat and sprinted to the door.
As he ran to his flat, Peter started to wonder if not wanting Harry to get suspicious of Peter’s absence was the real reason why he was in such a rush to get back. Indeed, if Harry were to question Peter about not being at his flat and text him about it, Peter could have simply pretended he had just left his flat to go on his walk and that Harry had missed him by a few minutes. Harry would then have probably then left and Peter could have kept working with Gwen until it was way too late. That might have been the responsible thing to do, as they really needed to get their gadget finished.
Maybe, just maybe, Peter was running to Harry because he wanted so badly to hang out with him and had jumped on the chance to do so with a valid excuse. To be fair, it was not completely unreasonable of Peter to take the rest of the night off. He and Gwen were basically done with their newest version, and the previous version had nearly held up to everything Peter had thrown at it. Thus, Gwen could probably finish it on her own tonight. Peter could then check tomorrow if it held up to all of their previous test and some new ones, which it should. After that, he would argue that they had covered all the realistic ways the goo-monster could break it.
So, yeah, it was not that irresponsible of him to run to Harry. Furthermore, Peter deserved to hang out with Harry. He had been working so hard, he deserved to spend some time with Harry. Harry obviously deserved it too. He had just started to forgive, yet again, Peter and Peter knew he would not give him infinite chances. If the point of doing everything Peter had done and was going to do was to protect Harry, then Peter definitely should meet him tonight.
By the time he arrived at his building, Peter had managed to convince himself that he had been totally right to run out and leave Gwen working alone. Crazy how that worked out. Peter rushed to the lift and started pressing his floor button a hundred times. Once the doors finally closed, Peter took a minute to get himself together. He could not let Harry see he had ran home when he was supposed to have been on a walk. His face was probably a bit red, but that was not actually too bad, as Harry would probably assume it was from the cold, and it partly was.
The lift’s doors opened and as soon as Peter’s eyes laid on Harry, Peter smiled, genuinely happy to see Harry. Harry did not smile. Why was he not smiling? Was he not happy to see Peter? Why? Peter quickly got out of the lift, eager to get more information about what was happening from Harry’s demeanour.
“Hi, I was on a walk,” Peter easily lied. “I’m happy to see you, though. Did you have trouble sleeping again or did you just want to hang out?”
It was well past Harry’s usual bedtime, but Peter did not want to pressure him into saying something was wrong when Harry might not be comfortable doing so. He could also have changed his bedtime and was there because he wanted to hang out.
As he waited for Harry to reply, Peter made his smile bigger. He was hoping that his big smile along his clear enthusiasm to see Harry would make Harry smile, but it did not. So, instead, he focused on unlocking his door. Maybe Harry was not doing okay and needed to be comforted but he did not want to let himself be vulnerable until they were safely in Peter’s flat? That would be fair, hence why it would be smart to get them inside as soon as possible.
“I wanted to talk to you, actually.”
The lack of any emotions in Harry’s voice was unsettling. It was not that Harry sounded empty, like Harry had looked when he was still recovering from his father’s betrayal, it was that he sounded so neutral. He sounded exactly like an AI which had not been given the ability to mimic feelings. What he had said was not helping Peter to not freak out either. Peter’s mind was already racing, searching for every possible thing Harry might want to talk about. Oh god, what if Harry had seen what Peter had seen? What if he too had stumbled on that poor person…? He did not look physically injured, though. So, clearly, he had not stumbled onto an unrestrained goo monster. Peter clung to the idea that, at the very least, the worst-case scenario had not happened and he should be thankful for that.
“Sure…” Peter replied, trying his hardest to hide his worries.
Peter entered the flat and quickly moved aside to let Harry also in, before closing the door behind him. It was okay, no matter what Harry wanted to talk about, it would be okay. Peter was probably freaking out over nothing. He would not be surprised if he had misunderstood Harry and Harry just needed to vent about his feelings. Peter would happily let him vent about anything he needed to vent about and thus he should not worry.
“I know you’ve been lying to me.”
All of Peter’s foolish hopes that Harry had not come to talk about something bad crumbled to dust. He actually had. Peter looked at his boyfriend, trying to process what he had just said. His boyfriend was staring back but his gaze was hard and cold, piercing Peter’s heart and giving it frostbite.
Should Peter deny it? Should he play dumb? To be honest, Peter was not sure what Harry was talking about specifically. He had lied to him so many times and had hidden countless things from him. Peter could not do damage control if he did not know what the damage was; he would only end up admitting to things Harry had not realised and make things worse.
“I know you’ve lied to me multiple times and that you’ve been hiding things as well…” Harry continued as if he had somehow read Peter’s mind. “I feel like I don’t know who you are. Not anymore, at least.”
“But you do,” Peter quickly replied, his eyes begging Harry to believe him.
Yes, Peter had been lying and hiding things from Harry, but he was not hiding who he truly was from him. It had been the opposite: he had been hiding his true self from Gwen and had been genuine with Harry. Had he not been? The pain he had been hiding did not define who he was, the moments he had shared with Harry did. However, Harry’s gaze grew even colder.
“No, I do not, Peter.” Hearing Harry call him by his actual name again was much more painful than it should have been. “You’ve been so distant, it’s like you don’t trust me.”
That was not true at all! In fact, it did not make an ounce of sense: firstly, Peter had not been distant, Harry had been! Harry had been so distant since their fight that it had been putting Peter on edge. Peter was terrified that Harry was suddenly going to decide to not forgive him anymore. Secondly, Peter did trust Harry, he just wanted to protect him. He just needed to make Harry see this. If Harry could see this, then he would understand that he was wrong.
“I’m not…”
“Do you really think I’m stupid enough to believe your bullshit excuse about going on walks?” Harry cut him off and Peter looked at him, stunned that he had cursed. It meant that things were really, really bad. “I know you’re out doing something else… or someone else.”
Harry’s words had cut Peter deep. Did Harry really believe that Peter was cheating on him?! Peter would never. Harry knew that, of course, he knew that, so why? Why was he…
“And your bruises as well,” Harry said, interrupting Peter’s thoughts. “Were you once again lying to me when you were telling me about your body image issues? Was that just to get me off your back?”
Tears started to flood Peter’s eyes as he instinctively stepped back. Harry’s words were so cruel. Peter knew that Harry had the right to be that mad at him, though. Indeed, Harry was not completely wrong, Peter had lied to him over and over again. He also had brought up his issues with how his body looked like to excuse his behaviour when he was hiding his bruises. He had not made those insecurities up, though, he had been truthful about them. Harry had to know that, right? Right?
Peter’s throat was closing up and the urge to just curl up onto himself was strong, but Peter had to say something. He had to try to explain to Harry why he had done what he had done.
“Harry, I…”
“I’m done, Peter,” Harry interrupted him again. “Don’t text me, don’t come talk to me during class.”
Harry’s face was so cold, completely devoid of emotions, which made his words sound even worse to Peter. Harry was actually done with him. He did not want to fight, to try to work through this. No, he was done. Peter could not accept that. He would not accept that, he loved Harry too much… but he could not tell him about the lab now, could he? It would just prove to Harry that he had been right that Peter had been lying to him. Worse, he would realise that Peter had been hiding things from him for longer than he could possibly imagine. Peter knew about the lab before they even became properly close. That would make Harry even more mad… Or maybe he would understand. He would understand that everything that Peter had been doing was to protect him. He would see how much Peter had sacrificed for him and maybe he would be willing to work through this?
Harry turned to the door and Peter jumped into action, grabbing Harry’s arm to stop him from leaving. Peter had no choice: he had to either tell him the truth or lose him, and he would do anything to not lose him.
“I’m Spider-Man,” Peter blurted out. “I’m that spider-guy that has been going around town not far from here.”
Harry froze as his eyes widened at Peter’s confession. Then, something flashed in them, but Harry’s face quickly went back to being emotionless before Peter got the chance to what it was.
“You’re lying yet again. Pathetic.” Harry snapped as his cold stare actually turned into anger. “Goodbye, Peter.”
Pathetic, Harry had called him pathetic. Peter was so stunned that he did not think of trying to keep his hold on Harry when Harry violently yanked his arm free of him. Peter nearly fell forward, catching himself by sticking to the wall at the last second.
It was actually over, Harry had just broken up with him. Harry probably hated him, and the worst thing was that Peter could not blame him. He could not blame him when he had given Harry so many reasons to distrust him. Peter had failed him. He had been so focused on protecting him physically, that he had completely fucked their relationship up. It was not fair. Peter had been trying so fucking hard to do what was best for Harry! He did not deserve to fail. Hell, he did not deserve to be in this position in the first place.
It was the lab’s fault, all of this was. All of Peter’s pain had been caused by them; they had changed his body, damaged his mind, put his boyfriend in danger, and overall ruined his life. They had even taken Harry from him, now. It was not fair, no, Peter had enough. No more of the lab taking things from him, it was his turn to take something from them. No matter the cost, he was going to make their abomination disappear.
Filled with purpose, Peter marched out of his flat and made his way to Gwen’s. Soon enough, he was putting on his suit whilst she was yelling at him.
“You can’t be serious, Peter!” she shouted practically in his face. “It’s not ready! We haven’t tested it yet. Hell, I have not even tested if it emits at the right frequencies yet, it could be completely useless for all I know!”
Peter knew this was a lie. They had tested the frequencies at which their new gadget emitted sound. Yes, they had not tested whether or not it would break again, but Peter did not give a fuck about that.
“Just stop and think for a second,” Gwen pleaded as she put a hand on Peter’s arm. “You’re not thinking straight, please…”
Peter roughly jerked his arm to get her hand off of him. He noticed how her whole body tensed up and how her jaw clenched at that, but once again, Peter did not care.
“Talk to me, please, Peter. Tell me what’s going on.”
“I told you already,” Peter snapped at Gwen before putting on his mask. “I’m done with this shit. No more waiting around.”
He was going to do what needed to done to get back Harry and nothing would stop him. Peter stuffed the device in the sort of pocket they had added specifically for it and turned to the window. Surprisingly, Gwen stepped in front of him, putting herself between him and the window. Peter had to admit it, she was brave for doing this whilst not having any super-powers, unlike Peter.
“Get out of my way,” Peter said, trying to keep a handle on his rising anger. He did not want to hurt Gwen, but he sure as hell would not let her stop him from getting Harry back.
“No,” Gwen replied in a firm voice.
Peter stared at her for a few seconds, resisting the urge to either yank her out of the way by pushing her or to shoot a web at her and violently pull on it. That would hurt her, and Peter just had enough self-control left in him to know he did not actually want that, even though it quite was tempting to do so right now. Instead, he shot webs at her in quick succession until she was all wrapped up in them.
“Peter!” Gwen scolded him.
Peter ignored it and gently pushed her towards the couch before letting her fall onto it. Then, he left the flat without giving her a second glance.
Getting the atrocity to come out of hiding was easy. Peter did not even need to go all the way to its usual neighbourhood. No, it attacked Peter on his way there. Peter was jumping from building to building, taking more risks than he usually did as he dared to jump over bigger and bigger gaps. Why should he be afraid of not making the jump when he would be able to shoot a web and catch himself? It was during one such daring jump that Peter’s course suddenly changed. Something wrapped around him and threw him violently to the side. Before Peter got the chance to try to understand what was going on, pain rippled all through his back. He let out a pained yelp before starting to fall. He quickly stuck to the wall, not wanting to sustain even further injuries, and stopped falling. As he looked up, he saw a huge shadow going straight towards him.
Peter quickly jumped from the wall and heard a loud crashing sound behind him. The goo monster must have just missed him. Peter shot a web onto the nearest building and climbed onto the roof before looking back. Peter’s anger had been temporarily overshadowed by the surprise of being attacked and by the pain still reeling in his back, but looking at the atrocity, at the thing that had stolen Harry from him, it was back and stronger than ever. Peter was going to make the atrocity pay. Peter was going to kill it.
Not wasting another second, Peter activated Gwen’s device and went to work. The thing had its pathetic head still stuck in the concrete wall as had probably been disoriented by its unplanned crash. Good, it made it an easy target. Peter shot web on either side of it and pulled on it as hard as he could. Sharp pain shot from Peter’s feet up to his legs as they made contact with the abomination. Despite the impact hurting like hell, the pain was not enough to tame Peter’s anger this time. So, Peter quickly looked to the side and swung the first thing he saw at the abomination.
It turned out to be a desk. They had actually burst into the building and were now in a somewhat small room. Peter rejoiced at the thought that the ultrasound was going to hurt the monster even more now that they were in a somewhat enclosed space. Indeed, he could hear the thing shrieking as the desk Peter had swung at it broke over its head.
Not wanting to give the thing a chance to fight back or try to leap out of the room, Peter kept swinging furniture after furniture at it, using all of his strength, until he ran out of things to throw.
The thing was on the floor and its shrieks were quieter. They were barely half as loud as they were before, but Peter was not satisfied. Peter had once felt bad for it, having difficulties to stomach seeing it in pain the first time they had used the device on it, but that was all gone now. All that was left was rage and determination.
That thing had taken Harry from him.
Peter had traumatised himself for Harry, but Harry had left him because of that thing.
That abomination.
It was not even human; it was a science experiment that should have never existed.
It was the thing that had taken everything from him, and he hated it for it.
Peter screamed and lunged at the thing. Before he knew it, he was punching it, letting all of his rage out on it. All of his anger, all of his frustration, all of his hurt and pain, all of it was focused in his fists.
The thing kept losing in volume, but Peter did not care.
The firmness of the thing changed, but Peter did not give it a second thought.
The horrible sound of bones getting crushed started to fill the room, but Peter did not notice. He just kept on punching, on, and on, and o…
“Pete…”
Peter froze. Only one person would call him that. That was when something shiny caught his eye. A grey ring on a grey chain. No, no, no, no, no…
“Pete… it’s okay…”
Peter looked up and saw Harry’s bloody face. It looked horrible, it was horrible. Harry was barely recognisable. Oh god, Peter had caused this. No, he could not have. He could not have hurt Harry, he would have never hurt Harry. He wanted to protect Harry, he would never hurt him, he would…
“Peter,” Harry’s weak voice said before coughing. “You have to get it. You have to… before…”
Harry kept coughing. Peter realised he was coughing blood. There was so much of it, how could there be so much of it?
Something jumped from Harry to Peter’s face and everything became black. He could not see anything. Peter instinctively reached for his face and felt something there. It was not solid, but not liquid either, and it was sure was stuck to his mask. It was as if it was trying to sink through his mask to get to him… It was the black goo. It was the black goo that had somehow infected Harry and that was now going for Peter.
The reality of the situation finally sunk in and Peter’s confusion and inability to process what was happening disappeared. He had to get rid of the goo, he could not let it infect him as well. He stuck his hands to it and pulled, as hard as he could. His mask ripped within seconds, leaving his whole head exposed, but now he could see. He needed to grab something he could trap the goo in. Shaking it off would not be good enough, he had to make sure it would not infect anyone else.
Peter spotted a trashcan that had somewhat been left intact in the mess Peter had made. It looked solid enough and Peter did not have any time to waste as the goo might try to jump on him again. Thus, Peter shot a web and pulled. In one swift movement, Peter threw his mask in the trash can as it reached him while his other hand grabbed a piece of a broken table to act as a lid. He then used his web to make sure the piece of wood would stay in place, shooting until he felt himself running dry.
The thing bounced around in the trash can, obviously pissed to be trapped, but it was too weak to break through. Thank fuck.
“Did you…” Peter nearly broke his neck turning his head towards the voice. “Did you trap it?”
Harry. Peter crawled to him and his brain immediately got overwhelmed again. It was begging Peter to look away, but he could not, he could not get his eyes off Harry’s horribly bloodied face. Peter could not have caused that, he could not have, please, he had not…
“Peter!” Harry’s voice said, louder this time. “Did you trap it?”
Peter jumped. It took him a second to understand what Harry was talking about. It felt like two separate realities smashing into each other whilst Peter’s brain was stuck in the middle. Peter nodded as he felt his chest start to move up and down faster than it normally would.
Something flashed onto Harry’s face before being overridden by pain again. It had almost looked like… relief, but it could not be. How could it be relief when he was looking like that?
“You’ve gotta go, now, Pete.”
“No,” Peter said but his word got mixed up with a sudden sob at the idea of leaving Harry behind.
How could he leave Harry like this? He would rather die.
“You’ve…” Harry slightly moved his arm but then ended up coughing more blood.
“No,” Peter said again as tears started to roll down his eyes and his sobs matched Harry’s cough. “I promised. I promised I would never leave you!”
He had meant it. It had not been an empty promise he had made to placate Harry, he had meant it with all of his heart. He could not leave Harry, ever.
“Police’s coming, you don’t have a mask anymore…”
“I don’t care!” Peter interrupted.
Peter moved to try to hold onto Harry, to cradle him, or to put his head against his chest, but there was so much blood and broken bones. Peter had no idea how to touch Harry.
“Please, Pete,” Harry begged. “You’ve got to, please…”
Harry’s eyes were looking straight into Peter’s, pleading, begging. It was nearly too much for Peter to bear.
“I don’t wanna…” Peter croaked out.
Peter did not want to say no to Harry when Harry was looking at him like that, but Peter did not want to leave him, he could not leave him. Who cared about the police?! They did not matter, all that mattered was Harry and Harry was dying right in front of him. Peter could not let him die alone. What kind of monster would Peter be if he let Harry die alone?
“Please…”
“No.” Peter shook his head.
He could hear police sirens but he did not budge, desperately holding onto Harry’s relatively untouched arm.
“I’ll… I’ll never forgive you…” Harry coughed some more. “… if you don’t go now.”
Peter froze and looked into Harry’s eyes. Harry looked back at him and saw he was sincere. Harry had found the one thing Peter could bear the idea of even less than letting Harry die alone: letting Harry die disappointed in him.
Peter tried to find a way out, to come up with a way to ignore the fact that he would be ignoring Harry’s dying wish, but he could not and the police sirens were so loud. The police were probably already making their way up.
“Peter, go now.”
Reluctantly, Peter let go of Harry and took a few steps back.
“Now.”
Peter could hear footsteps going upstairs, getting near. Peter quickly grabbed the trashcan containing the goo and looked back at Harry.
“I love you,” Peter said, fighting sobs again.
Then, Peter swung away before he got the chance to hear Harry’s reply as people burst into the room.
Notes:
Not going to lie, I really struggled to proofread this chapter. It was ROUGH.
The chapter's title is a line from "Savages" by Marina and the Diamonds. It is a great song and I think it really matches certain themes I tried to explore (and I freaking love Marina and the Diamonds). The next two chapters will also be named after songs that I have linked in my head with this fic and listened to whilst torturing myself thinking about different aspects of the story.
Some parts of "Savages" that particularly stood out to me in connection to the fic:
"One man can build a bomb, another run a race
To save somebody's life and have it blow up in his face""Is it running in our blood? Is it running in our veins?
Is it running in our genes? Is it in our DNA?""Underneath it all, we're just savages
Hidden behind shirts, ties and marriages
How could we expect anything at all?
We're just animals still learning how to crawl""Were we born to abuse, shoot a gun and run
Or has something deep inside of us come undone?
Is it a human trait or is it learned behaviour?
Are you killing for yourself or killing for your saviour?"It has a lot of other good lines, so I would definitely recommend listening to it.
Chapter 43: I Bet on Losing Dogs
Notes:
Content Warnings
Human experimentation mentioned – no details, just general references
Throwing up
From “Peter’s last memory of Harry’s face flashed in his mind” to “Are you okay?”
And from “Once the bin was reinforced enough to last through the night,” to “Peter looked at her and realised he would have no idea what to do right now without her”Vague mention of breaking bone
From “He looked down at his hands” to “I… I’ve killed him. Oh god, I’ve killed him…”
Mention of mercy killing
From “When she turned to him, her face softened and Peter knew she had indeed lost.” to “Peter said after a while.”
Please read the disclaimer at the end once you have finished reading the chapter.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Nothing felt real. Peter did not feel real himself. Everything felt so far away. Just a second ago, the world was being so loud and Peter was being forced to leave Harry behind. Now, the only thing making a sound was the goo still thrashing around in the trashcan, and Peter was somehow standing at Gwen’s door. Suddenly, the door opened and something pulled Peter in. Peter did not fight it. He did not resist either when the trashcan was ripped from his hands and his suit was taken off him. Peter could see blond hair, moving around him quickly, but it felt so far. He felt so far. Someone, Gwen hopefully, was touching him. Peter tried to force himself out of his blur, but his mind was fighting him, refusing to be shoved back into his brain. He was so dizzy…
A cold wave hit Peter and made him jump back. Or maybe he had not actually moved, as when he looked down, his hands were in a bucket of ice.
“Peter?”
Peter looked around, searching desperately for Harry. Peter had been with him just a few seconds ago…
“I…” Peter tried to speak but failed to form a sentence in his head.
His head still felt so blurry, it was hard to focus.
“Peter, you need to tell me, what happened?”
Peter’s last memory of Harry’s face flashed in his mind, how it had been covered in blood and deformed, and…
Peter threw up right where he was standing.
“Jesus, Peter…” Gwen let out as she quickly stepped back.
She moved around, probably trying to get something for Peter to throw up in, but it was too late. Peter threw up until there was nothing left for him to throw up, and then he threw up some more bile for good measure.
“There, there,…” Gwen repeated meanwhile, gently rubbing Peter’s back.
Once Peter had stopped retching, he felt himself be moved to the couch and let himself be pushed down onto it, sitting down on it. Then, Peter felt the couch shift and saw Gwen sitting down next to him.
“Are you okay?” she asked in the gentlest voice she had ever spoken to him in.
Peter wanted to burst out crying at that question, but his body was too exhausted.
“No,” he replied instead.
He looked down at his hands. They were shaking. They were all red too, but was that because of the ice or because of the punches? The sound of Harry’s bones breaking echoed in Peter’s head. Peter’s entire body shook and folded itself in two as if it had just been punched.
“I… I’ve killed him. Oh god, I’ve killed him…” Peter whispered.
Now that his mind was finally clear again, the horror of what had happened was coming back, clearer than it had been before.
“I punched, and punched, and I killed him!” Peter vigorously shook his head as if it would get the images out of his head. “I didn’t know it was Harry, I didn’t!” He could feel himself getting frantic. It was hard to breathe and he wanted to run and scream despite being so exhausted. “Why did he not tell me? Why did he not tell me?”
“Harry?” Gwen asked.
“Yes! Harry!” Peter shouted back.
The thought of Gwen not knowing who Harry made him angry. How dare she not know who he was?! He was the most important person in the whole world!
“Harry, my boyfriend! Harry, Harry Osborn! Harry…” Peter started to rant.
“Wait, did you say Osborn?” Gwen cut him off.
Peter nearly snapped his neck looking at Gwen. He was ready to shout at her again but instead froze. There was something about her expression. It seemed important enough to pull Peter out of his frenzy. She had realised something. Peter nodded as he tried to stop shaking so much.
“Harry Osborn, as in, the son of Norman Osborn?” Gwen asked, her voice sounding urgent.
Whatever Gwen had figured out, Peter did not like it
“Yes…” Peter said, debating if he really wanted to ask that next part. “Why?”
Gwen paused.
“Why?” Peter asked again, louder.
Peter could not take the suspense. He had to know now. Did Gwen not want to tell him why? Why would she not want to? That question made the wait feel a hundred times worse.
“Promise me you won’t do anything rash,” Gwen said as she looked straight into Peter’s eyes.
Peter could not bear making, and breaking, any more promises. Not tonight, not after breaking the most important one he had ever made.
“Gwen, tell me now,” he replied, trying to sound intimidating but his shaking voice betrayed him.
“Norman Osborn is the one funding the research,” she finally said after a few seconds.
It was Peter’s turn to stare at her.
“What?” he said, trying to process what Gwen had just told him. Gwen opened her mouth, probably to repeat herself but Peter cut her off. “No. No, he can’t be, no.”
Peter refused to believe what Gwen had said and he refused to let his mind work out the implications.
“He is, Peter. The university would never fund this directly; they had to go find some better funding elsewhere.”
Gwen reached for Peter’s hand, probably to soothe him because she had probably already figured out what all of this meant, but Peter moved his hand away and quickly got up.
“No, that doesn’t make sense!” Peter snapped. “He knew that Harry was working at the lab! He wouldn’t…”
Would he not? He had cut Harry off, after all. Not only that, he had publicly shamed him and he had destroyed his image to the world. No decent parent would ever do that. Clearly, Norman Osborn was certainly not one. So, would it be that hard to believe that he would not care that he was putting his son directly in harm’s way with the research he was financing? Unless… Peter felt his head spinning again.
After that Harry had been cut off, Peter had secretly wished that the lab would deem Harry useless now that he did not have his father’s backing. But they had not, they had still wanted him. Then, whilst Harry was still considering going back to the lab, Norman Osborn had published that awful piece about him, practically calling him worthless and useless. Yes, it had pushed Harry to go back to the lab to prove his father wrong, but what if that had not been the intent? What if Norman had wanted to make Harry look worthless not to the world in general, but to the lab specifically? What if he had cut Harry in the hopes that the lab would not want Harry anymore?
This would mean that Norman indeed knew about what the lab was doing, all of it. So if he knew, if he was aware of how much danger his son was in, why would he not just forbade Harry from working there? Or, better yet, why would he be cutting off his son instead of stopping to fund the lab? Was he being threatened, somehow?
Peter was thus left with a very important question. What was the most likely: had the lab somehow managed to get Norman Osborn under their thumb, or was Norman Osborn simply a monster?
“I…” Peter grabbed the top of his head and shut his eyes, trying to pull his thoughts to their places. “I’ve got to talk to Norman.”
“Peter…” Gwen said in her disapproving voice.
“I’m not going to do anything stupid!” Peter lashed out, opening his eyes again and letting his arms fall onto his sides.
Gwen had a weird look on her face. Peter was not sure what it meant but, for some reason, it made him question what he had just said. After all, here he was, losing his mind whilst standing in his underwear, not because Gwen had had to tend to injuries, but because he had had so much blood on him she thought he had been injured. Blood that came from Harry. Harry who had just killed. He had killed someone. Not just anyone, Harry, the person he loved the most and had been ready to do anything to protect. What if Norman did know about Harry being in danger and had decided to abandon him? What if he had happily let his son be experimented on and turned into a monster?
Peter violently shook his head as he remembered what that one human test subject had looked like. Had Harry experienced something so terrible? Had he been in pain? He had looked so relieved… Peter thought he might be sick again. So many thoughts were crashing into one another in his head, and he knew it would only get worse. His brain was still a bit foggy and, once it would fully clear, it would probably be more than he could take.
So yes, it was risky to let Peter go see Norman Osborn, but Peter had to finish dealing with this before the fog finished clearing. There were still people stuck in the lab, people that he could still save, who were counting on him, like Wade.
“You can come with me,” Peter finally said. “You can come and make sure I don’t lose it, but we go talk to him soon.”
Again, Gwen stared at him. Her expression had changed, however. It had gone from the one that had made Peter question himself to the one Gwen always used to wear at the beginning. It felt… impersonal.
“You’re right, we have to talk to him as soon as possible,” she said in a tone that sounded oddly professional. “You’ve… The biggest hurdle we knew about is gone, which means the research facility should be clear now. We don’t want to give them the time to… replicate their success.”
Peter noticed at which part she paused. He noticed how she had been carefully choosing her words. He did not comment on it, though. He knew Gwen was doing her best and he knew that confronting her would crumble the fragile stability his mind had found. So, Peter nodded.
“And we have an ‘in’, now, so to speak,” Gwen added. “We might be able to… convince Norman Osborn to help us out.”
Peter felt a bitter taste in his mouth. Surprisingly, it was not caused by the idea of having to ask Norman – fucking dead-beat father – Osborn for help. No, it was caused by seeing that Peter had been right. Gwen had literally just learnt about Peter’s connection to the Osborns, to Harry, and here she was, already planning to exploit it. Did she even care about what had happened to Harry? Or worse, did she even give a damn about what Peter had done? That was not a fair question. It was not fair to Gwen, and Peter knew it. He was the one responsible for what had happened, he had…
“I imagine he will be coming to town as soon as he can,” Gwen said, interrupting Peter’s spiral. “We’ll need a way to talk to him without making the research centre suspicious.”
Peter shook his head, yet again trying to put his thoughts into the right places. He could not let himself spiral; he needed to figure out a plan of action with Gwen.
“Maybe he’ll go to Harry’s flat?” Peter suggested. “Or maybe we can draw him there?”
Yes, the flat was now officially under Peter’s parents’ name, but they had not changed the lock, and it would make sense for Norman to go there, would it not? Oh god, Peter was using Harry to…
“Do you have the keys to that flat?” Gwen asked.
Peter shook his head whilst trying to fight yet another spiral. Harry had not given Peter his flat’s key. Even if he had, he would have taken those back by now.
“No, but I can pick the lock.”
Luckily, Peter still had some tools he had made while planning his first break-in. He had not brought them with him during that break-in as he had figured they would not be the most efficient, but they would certainly be enough to open a simple flat’s door.
“Okay, then we can wait for Norman Osborn there. We can also track his private planes, I know an app for that, so we can try to see when he will get to the city. Whether or not he will go to the flat will still be a gamble, however…”
It was, but Peter did not know how to change that, not right now at least.
“Still, it is our best plan right now,” Gwen concluded.
She stayed silent for a few seconds and Peter did not say anything.
“Right, let’s get you covered up, you must be freezing,” Gwen said as she stood up.
Was Peter freezing, like she had just said? He did not know. He did not think so, but his head was still so messy. His thoughts were so blurry, so maybe he did feel cold and did not realise.
“Okay…”
“I’ll get you some pyjamas and a blanket.”
As Peter watched Gwen walk out of the living room to the hallway leading to her bedroom, Peter felt the urge to run after her and ask her to stay. He did not, though. Instead, he stayed frozen in place, as if he had taken Gwen’s previous statement a bit too literally. Maybe he had. Gwen reappeared after a few seconds carrying what looked like a very fluffy blanket and the pyjamas Peter had worn the last time he had had to spend the night at Gwen’s. Were they becoming his pyjamas? That sense of familiarity felt like something he desperately needed to hold on to right now. Gwen helped him put the pyjamas on and Peter did not complain. Her touch was soft and his body was sore.
“You can take my bed tonight,” Gwen said as she put the blanket onto Peter’s shoulders.
It had a decent weight to it but it was not crushing. It was also indeed fluffy.
“Okay…” Peter replied again, not knowing what else to say.
The thought of being alone, in the dark, was definitely not pleasant right now, though.
“I need you to reinforce the webs on the trash can before you go and I’ll have to check up on you regularly.”
Peter was not sure why she would need to check up on him when none of his injuries were serious enough to warrant her to do so, but he did not have the mental capacity to argue. So, he just did as Gwen had requested and went to shoot some more webs at the trash can and its makeshift lid. As he did so, Peter tried to not think too much about what was in it. Yes, they would have to figure out at some point what to do with its contents, but Peter did not want to have his brain spiral about that right now. So, he just told himself he would just thrust it into Norman’s care when they would meet with him. It was his thing, after all.
Once the bin was reinforced enough to last through the night, Peter turned to face Gwen and his eyes got caught on his vomit on the floor. He had forgotten about it, not smelling it nor tasting it in his mouth. He usually had to brush his teeth a thousand times or so after throwing up and that would still not be enough to get rid of the taste. Was it weird that he could not taste it right now? Or maybe that had been the bitter taste he had noticed earlier.
“Don’t worry about it,” Gwen said, interrupting Peter’s thoughts. “I’ll clean it.”
Peter looked at her and realised he would have no idea what to do right now without her. Maybe he should have told her everything from the very beginning. Peter’s head spun faster and he had to take a few moments to not only push the right thoughts to the front of his mind, but shove back the ones that were trying to crawl out of the pits of his mind.
“Okay,” he said for the third time.
Then, he stared at Gwen. He knew she expected him to go to bed alone now, but the idea of it felt terrifying.
“Can I… stay with you for a bit?”
Gwen’s face relaxed. It felt much nicer like that, safer even.
“Sure. Sit on the couch, I’ll join you.”
Peter obeyed and sat with his legs folded against his chest as he stared at a random point on the wall. When Gwen did join him later, she was carrying her laptop. She stopped and stared at him for a few seconds. Peter stared back at her, wondering what she was doing. Then, she adjusted the blanket around Peter so his body would be completely covered.
“Here…” she whispered barely loud enough for Peter to hear before sitting down next to him.
Now that he was engulfed in a warm blanket, Peter could feel how exhausted he really was. He did not want to sleep, though, as he was scared of what he would see. So, instead, he watched Gwen open things on her computer and fought to keep his eyes open.
Peter was not sure how much time had passed when Gwen woke him up. He could tell it was still night or early morning, though, as there was no sunlight coming from the window. He had not probably slept that much then. The sun would always be at least peeking through when he would wake up to go to class now that it was spring. He did not feel very much rested either. If he had to guess, Gwen had only let him sleep a couple of hours. He had not had a single nightmare, though, so Peter did not really feel the need to complain about how little sleep he had gotten.
However, waking up had been rough. There had been a few seconds during which Peter had just been confused about why he was on Gwen’s couch, basically drooling on her. He had even worried about having missed texts from Harry which might make Harry wonder where Peter had been. It had all crashed down when Gwen had turned her laptop screen towards him and announced that Norman Osborn’s plane would be landing soon. What had happened the previous night had then flashed into Peter’s mind and he had suddenly felt himself freefalling through all the layers of hell. He had physically cringed, quickly pulling away from Gwen, before he had managed to push everything down. He knew it would only make the blow-up worse, whenever it would happen, but he had to delay it, at least until he had gotten the people stuck in the lab out.
Doing his best to ignore that he was essentially a ticking time bomb, Peter had quickly gotten ready alongside Gwen. He had put on the clothes he had started to keep at Gwen’s place just in case he ever needed to have a fresh set and then had managed to convince Gwen to let him eat later. Peter knew he should probably eat; his last meal had been forever ago, but he was not sure he would be able to keep it down. They then had been on their way to Harry’s.
Simply stepping into Harry’s flat had nearly been too much for Peter. It felt too familiar, too comforting, too much like Harry. Peter could not help it, he would turn his head and expect to see Harry suddenly appear, before remembering he would never appear. Peter could feel his heart break again and again. He wanted to run out of the flat, scared he was about to lose his precarious control. Paradoxically, the idea of running out and having this semblance of Harry being ripped apart from him was too agonizing for Peter to actually leave. He felt like an explorer lost in the Arctic who was burning his hand by touching a flame to try to not freeze to death.
“I can handle it myself if it’s too much for you. I don’t…” Gwen started to say.
Peter shook his head. He had to do this. He had to confront Norman and see if they had been trying to achieve the same goal all along, or if he was purely evil.
After that, Gwen did not say anything else, and neither did Peter. They just waited, in silence, until the flat’s door opened and Peter found himself face-to-face with Norman Osborn.
He did not look like how Peter had remembered him. It did not feel like he was towering over everyone with his presence but instead was slightly hunched over. His face looked sunken as well as if he had aged ten years or so since the last time Peter had seen him. He seemed… sad. He just looked like a sad man. Of course he was sad, his son just had died. Oh god, Peter had killed his son. The precarious balance that was Peter’s mind tipped over for a second as the realisation set in and everything nearly came crashing down. Peter, and Gwen, had been scared he would just lose it at the sight of the man and let his anger take over making him lose control again. Peter had been aware that there was a real possibility he would try to beat the man up, that was why Gwen was there after all. However, Peter did not feel angry. No, he was feeling something much, much worse than anger.
Norman barely reacted when he finally noticed Peter, but Peter held his breath and waited. He waited as Norman looked him up, shot a look towards Gwen, before looking back to Peter, his face hardening. Peter waited for him to speak, as he knew he would not be able to get the words out if he tried right now.
“So, you’ve figured it out, huh?” Norman said after closing the door behind him
Peter’s jaw tensed up. What a lovely way to start the conversation. As if everything that had happened had just been a big old puzzle Peter had enjoyed solving.
“I did,” Peter mumbled.
Norman looked at him, expectantly. Peter stated back, having no idea what he was supposed to say.
“Well, boy, have you contained the specimen?”
“I have,” Peter said bitterly.
Norman’s shoulder dropped and he sighed. It was as if he was relieved. How the fuck could he be relieved when his son, his only son, the best son that anyone could ever wish for had just died. Did he not care?! No, of course, he would not, the only thing that mattered was his precious ‘specimen’, Peter should have known.
“Have you ever cared about Harry, or did you never give a shit about him?!” Peter spit out as he could not hold his anger in any longer.
How could he when he was faced with this?!
“Of course, I cared about him!” Norman yelled. “Do you really think I’d let my own son get turned into a science experiment?! That I’d let him get turned into that?”
“You cut him off!” Peter yelled back, feeling himself getting even more heated.
“I was protecting him!” Norman stepped forward. “I was working my ass off, trying to protect him at all cost, and you…” Norman slowly raised his hand to point a finger at Peter with that same disgusting look he had had when they had first met. “You’re the one that messed it up. Getting involved in other people’s business and messing with things you don’t even understand. You might have been adopted, but you’re a Stark alright.”
Peter had not expected Norman to have known that he was adopted. It had never been a secret per se, but not something really publicly discussed either. Looking back to when they had first met, Peter now saw how Norman had possibly implied knowing about this with his comment about not believing that someone could deem Peter’s father fit to raise a child. Peter had been too busy being angry back then to realise this. In any case, Peter was absolutely not surprised to see Norman trying to use the fact that Peter was adopted against him.
“Alright, that’s enough–” Gwen moved to step between them, but Peter was quicker on his feet and he smoothly went around her and towards Norman.
“Fuck you!” Peter let out without thinking. “I would have done anything for him! I did everything that I could for him! I–”
“All you did was make things worse!” Norman interrupted, waving his hand around to dismiss what Peter had just said. He was clearly not scared to anger someone with super-human force. “Why do you think I cut him off?! They were considering moving to human trials and trying to force my hand by threatening me with my son. I thought that severing the ties between us would have been enough to keep him safe… But no, you had to go around in that stupid costume of yours and show them they had already succeeded! After that, it was all out of my hands.”
Peter cringed at the accusation, remembering what Gwen had told him, had warned him about when he had first brought up the idea of getting some real fighting experience.
“You could have reported them…” Peter said in a much quieter voice, trying to fight that awful feeling coming over him.
“They were also threatening to pin all of this on me and would have done so.” Norman waved away the idea as if it had been stupid of Peter to bring it up. “After seeing your performances, they moved on to human trials despite my protests and made sure there would be a record that I was aware of it. On top of that, disowning Harry publicly turned out to not be enough to convince them that I did not care for him. They, rightly so, suspected I had done it in an attempt to protect him. So, I did my best to make them believe me and make Harry seem completely useless to them. I had also hoped the piece would… dissuade him from coming back to the lab.”
Peter’s suspicions had been correct, Norman had done those horrible things to try to protect Harry. It did not make Peter feel one bit better, though. No, as he could see Norman’s point. If Peter’s parents had not been there to support Harry, would he have gone back to the lab?
“I tried to dissuade him too,” Peter pointed out, desperately trying to keep all of his pieces held up together. “But if you had –”
“For god’s sake, if you had never broken into the lab, none of this would have ever happened in the first place!” Norman cried out, projecting all of his frustration towards Peter. “And you showing off your powers… that, that was the final nail in the coffin.”
Norman was right. Gwen had been right. If only Peter had listened to her if only he had not given the lab the time and motivation to hurt Harry… He had completely failed Harry: he had not ‘just’ killed him, he had doomed him.
“Like I said, that’s enough,” Gwen interrupted again and this time, Peter let her. “We’re not here to pass around blame.”
Peter had doomed Harry. That realisation was spreading throughout Peter’s soul and eating it away like acid. Harry was dead because of him, Harry had gotten infected because of him. If Peter had not been so stupid and reckless, Harry would still be here. If Peter had not been a coward, Harry would have been saved before it was too late. If Peter had cared either less or more, Harry would be alive. Worse, if Peter had not cared about Harry, Harry would not have died. The goo had not been the monster, Peter had been. All of this was his fault, all of it…
“Peter?”
Peter shivered the thoughts away and looked at Gwen, who was looking at him. Had she asked him a question? Norman was looking at him too, but Peter quickly looked away from him and back to Gwen. He could not take his cold stare. Peter opened his mouth but nothing came out. That was not good. It was not the moment to get into his shell. Peter clenched his jaw as he forced himself to get out of it and ignored the painful feeling in his stomach that was begging him to go hide far away.
“Sorry, I didn’t hear you,” Peter awkwardly said as he tried desperately to seem okay.
Gwen stared at him a bit longer, her eyes seemingly scanning his whole face. As Peter was about to look away, feeling uncomfortable, Gwen spoke:
“He was saying that –”
“I am willing to turn over all of the communications I had with the research centre and the proof I have collected to the authorities,” Norman cut her off. “It will be more than enough to get their research shut down and to ensure the people responsible will be held accountable.”
This was great news, Peter should feel relieved: they had finally the proofs they desperately needed, but he did not. He looked at Norman, thinking over what he had just said. By turning everything he had on the lab over to the authorities, Norman was willingly exposing his own involvement in all of this. He had funded the research, after all, he would be held responsible. However, Peter did not need to ask him why he was willing to do that now. The lab had lost their leverage on him, he had nothing to lose, only revenge to gain.
“What about Gwen?” Peter asked. “Wouldn’t that put her in trouble?”
Peter felt guilty asking that to Harry’s father. He felt like he should be hell-bent on revenge, no matter the cost, but he knew he would not handle losing Gwen too. If he did…
“No, I’ll make sure it’s clear from the evidence that she left before they…” Norman fell silent for a moment. “That she left before they moved to human subjects and I’ll doubt they will care much about her involvement prior to that. They’ll have bigger things to worry about. However, it would be helpful if I could… pretend to have found you, a witness who can testify that they tried to beat her up. It would prove they tried to silence her too and that she did leave when we’re saying she did.”
Peter tensed up. Of course he was more than happy and willing to help making sure that Gwen would not get punished for something she had thought hard against. However, this would mean getting himself publicly involved in this ordeal, as Peter Stark. God, Peter had not even told his parents that he had gotten beaten up, they were going to be so mad at him. Peter nearly laughed at that thought. Harry was dead because of him, and Peter was worried about getting into trouble with his parents. How fucking stupid was that?!
“Okay,” Peter forced himself to say.
“I will, of course, make sure to conceal the rest of your involvement in this affair,” Normand added.
A new wave of guilt washed over Peter. Was that a really fair thing to do? Should Peter not face further consequences as well? The lab was going to pay, Norman too, even Gwen… but not Peter. If he were to accept what Norman was suggesting, he would walk away from this with no consequences. That was not fair.
“I –”
“That part is settled, then,” Gwen interrupted Peter, shooting him one of her looks that meant that Peter was supposed to shut up and listen to her.
She seemed so sure of herself, so determined. Norman did too. Gwen’s certainty, Peter could understand. Yes, she had to deal with Peter’s mess, but she had not lost anyone. Norman, however, had cared for Harry. He had not been a good father, though, far from it. Even before this whole mess had started, he had not been present in Harry’s life, from what Peter had gathered. Maybe that was how he could stay so collected and think so rationally now? Maybe he was used to distance himself? Peter wished he could do that too. Yes, it was selfish when he should be absolutely devasted by what he had done, but he could not be right now. There were people still stuck in the lab, people who had been abducted and experimented on because of him. He had to hold himself together and get them out. So, once again, Peter pushed all of his feelings down and tried his best to focus.
“Do you know if…” Peter looked at Norman, still trying to make sense of everything that was floating around in his brain. “Did they manage to do what they did… to someone else?”
Peter’s sentence made no sense, but his brain did not make a lot of sense to begin with. It seemed to have still somehow gotten the message across as Norman stiffened.
“As far as I know, Harry was the only success.”
A bitter taste appeared in Peter’s mouth again, but he ignored it and instead focused on the opportunity it gave them, as Gwen would. Like Gwen had.
“Okay, then, I’m getting them out while you’re leaking the things. We’re not going to give them the chance to try to clean up the people there,” Peter stated, mustering all the confidence he could gather.
Gwen and Norman exchanged a look. Peter could tell that look meant something, that they were telling each other something, but it was like trying to understand a foreign language. After what felt like forever, Gwen looked at him. Had she lost whatever debate they had had? When she turned to him, her face softened and Peter knew she had indeed lost.
“You know it’s not going to be a pretty sight and there will be some people that you’ll not be able to save?”
Her voice had been as gentle as it could have been, but Peter understood the horrible implications that lay behind what she had said. He still had the image of what had been left of one of the test subjects branded onto his brain with a hot iron. He would not be able to save someone as injured and as far gone as that. The question then was what was more cruel: to walk past them and ignore their suffering, or to put an end to it? Peter had blood on his hands already and he was the cause of all the suffering that had happened in the lab. So, was it not his duty to do something?
“I know,” Peter said after a while.
“I’ll come with you,” Gwen said as she placed a hand on Peter’s arm. Peter opened his mouth to object. He did not want Gwen to put herself in danger and see what he had seen, but she gave him a look to silence him again. “You’ll need help getting people out, and I’ll be able to evaluate injuries so we know which one to treat in priority while we get everyone to a hospital.”
Why did Gwen always make such good points when Peter did not want to agree with her?
“I can also arrange help to transport them,” Norman added. “I’ll need a couple of days to arrange everything and make sure the story we present to the world is airtight.”
“Is the research centre not going to consider that you might try to get revenge and so try to double-cross you?” Gwen asked.
“I’ll handle them,” Norman replied, sounding quite confident. “They will not see it coming.”
Peter did not feel in a position to question Norman, and neither did Gwen apparently. So, they agreed they would set their plan into motion in two days. Once they were done discussing what to do with the black good that Peter had caught, it was time for them to go their separate ways. Norman had things to do, and Peter had to go back to his flat and act shocked when the news about Harry would reach his parents and then him. Peter did not look forward to when that would happen. He was going to have to make up some reason why his parents could not come to support him and figure out what had happened to Harry as soon as they possibly could. Peter could not have them around before he had gone through with the plan. He would not manage having to display his heartbreak in front of them without completely breaking down, and that would mess everything up. Peter was already exhausted without having that extra pressure. He wished he could sleep away the two excruciating days that were waiting for him.
As he was about to leave Harry’s flat, Peter paused and looked back to Norman, a question burning on his lips.
“Have you… Have you seen him?”
Norman sharply looked up from his phone and Peter watched as pain rippled throughout Norman’s face. That answered Peter’s question.
“I have,” Norman replied with a hint of his pain. “I was, however, not able to stay with him long, as, officially, I was only there to identify him.”
There were so many things that Peter wanted to say. He wanted to say that he was sorry, that he wanted to see him too, and so much more. Above all, he wanted to ask Norman if he knew how long after the police had arrived on the scene had Harry died. How long had Peter abandoned him? How long had he suffered? How badly had Peter broken his promise? But Peter could not ask those questions as the words got stuck in his throat. It was probably for the best; he might not be able to handle the answer to those questions right now. So, instead, Peter nodded and rushed out the door.
Notes:
Thank you so very much to my incredible beta reader and favourite artist yenshuii for this amazing art! You can find her on Bluesky.
Disclaimer: The purpose of this chapter is not to redeem anyone. Norman Osborn was a bad father before Harry even got to MIT, and what he did to try to save him does not erase that. I am not saying that what Norman did to protect Harry was right or wrong, that is up to you to decide, I am just revealing the part he played in all of this and his rationale.
The title is from the song with the same name, "I Bet on Losing Dogs", by Mitski.
I have to be honest, before writing this fic I was not into her music. However, as I kept writing, I realised that some of her songs match quite well some of the vibes of the story. Most of the ones I enjoy do remind me of Harry more specifically. I have a playlist for him and half of the songs are by Mitski. If you want to know what songs I have in his playlist / more why I think he fits quite a few Mitski songs let me know.
But yeah, "I Bet on Losing Dogs" not only fits the story (and especially this chapter and the previous one) quite well, but also speaks to my own feelings as the person who wrote this fanfic.
Here is the version I usually listen to: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWyVNXgg94U
Chapter 44: Did you get enough love, my little Dove?
Notes:
And here is the last chapter of the fic! Thank you so very much for following along and I hope you enjoyed the fic. It is going to be strange to not be posting a new chapter every week or every two weeks, as I have been posting this fic for over a year.
I do plan on posting other works at some point. Some of them will be related to this fic, some of them will not be but will have the Peter/Harry ship again, and some might be loosely related to this fic or just in the same general fandom. So, if you liked this fic and want more, make sure to keep an eye on when I post things / user subscribe.
Thank you again so very much to everyone who kudo’ed, commented, subscribed, bookmarked, and who followed this fic.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
Peter looked like shit. His eye bags looked more like valleys carved into his face and his eyes were just empty. Considering how little he had been sleeping, it would have been more surprising if he had not looked like shit. Every night since that night, Peter had found himself unable to sleep for more than a few hours at a time. No matter how tired he was, he just could not sleep. He was not eating properly either, which was probably contributing to his everlasting tiredness and made him look even less alive. Even his hair was a fucking mess. It was overgrown and his roots were taking over, splitting his hair into two colours and making it look absolutely ridiculous.
As Peter took a closer look at his roots, he realised he had not seen that much of his natural colour in a very long time. He would have to ask Harry to help him dye his hair again, unless Harry liked that hair colour better. If he did, Peter would grow it out. Peter would have to ask… Right, he could not ask him, not anymore. Peter would never be able to ask him anything again. He would never be able to know what hair colour Harry would have preferred on Peter. Peter clenched his fist around some of his hair. How could he have forgotten that when he was getting ready for Harry’s funeral? Peter took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself down.
He just had to make it through Harry’s funeral, and then he would be able to finally let himself crumble down. He just had to make it through X or Y, that was what Peter had kept on telling himself. He would always find a new reason why he could not let his grief out of the hole he had pushed it into. First, it had been to meet Norman. Then, it was because of the people stuck in the lab, people that were depending on him. After that, it was because they were waiting to see if the authorities believed Norman’s story. Now, it was because of the funeral. Would it ever end? At least, Peter had gotten through the worst part: going back to the lab a third time. The third time’s a charm, right?
Peter had pushed so many things down that day and had eroded what little was left of himself even more. As they had previously agreed, Gwen had gone with him this time around. Maybe Gwen had hoped it would also help him to stay grounded and thus have a positive effect on him, but it had not. No, it had just put even more weight on Peter’s shoulders. He had told, no, promised himself that he would not let Gwen get caught or see anything like he had seen the last time he had been in there. Indeed, Gwen was still okay, she was not tainted like Peter was. Thus, it had been his burden to carry. He had gone through the test subjects first before letting Gwen assess and help them. Peter had definitely not needed a medical degree to do this screening. No, it had been unfortunately and agonizingly clear who could not be saved. The things that the lab had done to them…
They had saved people, that was what mattered, right? It had to matter. They had saved people, and they had even saved Wade. But they had not saved Harry.
At least, they had not stumbled onto another goo monster, may that be inside someone or on its own. Peter had been so terrified of the possibility of Gwen getting ‘infected’ by it or being put in harm’s way. Peter would not survive it if anything were to happen to Gwen. It was also some great news because it meant that the one that Norman was in charge of securely containing until he could figure out how to get rid of had been the only one. Norman had seemed to know quite a lot about it but had not told Peter anything about it. Peter did not want to know anyway, he was too haunted by the horror he already knew about. There were so many horrible pictures in his head…
Peter gasped for air as he pushed everything back down. Peter had not the time to break down as he had somewhere to be. Harry would had never let him hear the end of it if Peter were to be late at his funeral because he was too busy mopping around about how shit he looked. Harry would have gone on and on about how Peter still looked so hot and would have said silly things like that, and Peter would have smiled. Harry would have loved seeing him in a suit again, no matter how shit he looked in it. Peter found himself hoping that Harry would have approved the suit. He probably would have, as Peter’s Dad had picked it for him, meaning it was safe from Peter’s horrible fashion choices. But Harry would never actually see it and it was all Peter’s fault.
Not wanting to give himself the time to spiral again and possibly break down, Peter quickly combed his hair again before rushing out of his flat.
There were quite a few people, more than Peter had expected. Peter did not know any of them except for his parents who had been allowed to accompany him to the funeral. They had arrived just the day before and Peter had barely spoken with them since then. Peter could not handle spending time with them, not right now. Just looking into their eyes and seeing all the pain they were themselves carrying because of Harry’s death was enough for Peter to get pulled deep into the ocean of his guilt. So, Peter quickly greeted them as he joined them and then kept looking around.
The funeral was being held in a church not too far from the campus. Harry had never mentioned being religious, so Peter was not sure if he had been or if Norman was and he had decided this way how Harry’s funeral should be held. No matter the reason, Peter felt small standing in a building with such a high ceiling. Peter did not mind the open sky, but for some reason, he was not a fan of really open indoor spaces. Not that open, at least.
As Peter looked away from the ceiling, he finally spotted another familiar face a few feet away from the sea of strangers. Norman Osborn was standing at what Peter could only describe as the religious podium, talking to someone that Peter did not recognise. Peter had not directly spoken to Norman since they had broken the people out of the lab. They had to keep their distance as Norman and Gwen were still dealing with the legal ramifications of the situation, and Peter had to pretend to be uninvolved except for that time he had gotten beaten up. From what he had managed to hear from Gwen, Norman had taken a plea deal and Gwen would be fully cleared once Peter had officially met with the police. That meeting was scheduled in a couple of days. So, they were not out of the woods yet, but things were going according to plan so far.
Peter was glad that they had let Norman go to Harry’s funeral. Peter had not forgiven the man for how shitty of a father he had been to Harry, and he probably never would after seeing him turn Harry into a scared little boy. However, Peter was glad that Norman was at the funeral. Harry would have probably appreciated it if he knew what Peter knew now, so Peter appreciated it.
Realising he had probably been staring at Norman, Peter quickly looked away and his eyes fell on the casket. It was closed. Harry was in there, and it was closed. Peter felt the urge to run to it, to throw himself onto it, or try to snatch it open. He was so desperate to just feel Harry against him again. That was all he wanted, to hide his face against Harry, feel him again. But now, he could not even see him. He would never see him again. That was not fair. Peter needed to see him again, he needed him. Peter could not do this without him…
“It’s okay, kid,” Peter’s Dad said as he put a hand on Peter’s shoulder.
No, it was not okay. Peter wanted to yell at him, to shout that it was anything but okay. All of this was his fault, Harry would still be alive if it was not for him. Peter could not do that, though. Hell, Peter could not even look at his own Dad right now. So, instead, Peter slightly nodded and quickly wiped the tears that had escaped him.
The time for the service came and they all quietly sat down, letting some guy from the church talk. He talked about how much of a tragedy Harry’s death was but Peter did not know him to tell him that, he already knew it. He had felt it, he was feeling it, he would feel it forever. There would always be something missing in Peter’s soul. So, after a while, Peter zoned out the guy’s speech and kept his eyes fixed on Harry’s closed coffin.
Then, some guy went up to the podium. It was the man Norman had been talking to. He was apparently going to be the one giving that speech about how loved the person in the coffin had been. Peter already knew that too, but this time, he listened. From what the man said, Peter gathered he was the man who had been in charge of raising Harry after his mother had passed. What was his name again? It had been a somewhat odd name, or maybe a fancy one… Peter could not remember. He did remember wondering if he would meet him one day. Now that he had somewhat met him, Peter wished he had not, or at least not like this.
When the service finished, Peter excused himself to his parents and rushed outside. It was too crowded inside the church and it was making it hard to breathe. Peter just needed some air, if he got some, then the crushing sensation on his lungs would go away. But it did not, and Peter found himself desperate to somehow catch his breath.
“Stark.”
Peter whipped around to see Norman standing a few feet away from him. Peter’s eyes widened. They were supposed to keep their distance as they were supposed to hate each other. To be honest, Peter still hated him, but not as much as he hated himself. Still, why was Norman risking to be seen talking with him?
“You should have this,” Norman said stepping forward as he presented Peter with a small box.
It looked like the boxes that the fancy jewellery his Dad would gift his Mom would be in. Peter frowned. Why on earth would Norman would be gifting him jewellery? There was a piece of jewellery that would be meaningful enough for Norman to risk talking to Peter like this. But it could not be that, could it? Peter stared at the box. Did he want it to be that?
“Is it…”
The words got caught in his throat.
“It is,” Norman replied, his voice sounding too neutral considering what they were talking about.
Peter had to fight an overwhelming urge to rip the box from Norman’s hands and cradle it. He had never needed to possess something so badly. Peter would be willing to trade his entire collection, all of his most prized possessions, for this and Norman was just handing it to him.
“Take it.”
“I can’t,” Peter croaked out.
He was dying to take it, but he could not, it was not right. Peter did not deserve to possess such a precious thing, not after what he had done to Harry. It was too important to be wasted on him, to let him taint it. Peter looked up to Norman. He was scared that if he kept on staring at the box he might end up snatching it away anyway. Norman stared back at him.
“You can,” He said firmly, before using in a much quieter voice. “Please, take it.”
It nearly sounded as if Norman was pleading. So, with a shaking hand, Peter took the box. He had moved his hand slowly towards it to give Norman the chance to change his mind, but as soon as Peter had wrapped his fingers against the box, he had quickly brought it up against his chest. Still, he could not ignore the feeling that he was underserving of it.
“Are you sure?” Peter asked, trying to stop his voice from shaking too much. “It was your wife’s.”
Norman stayed silent for a few seconds, staring at the box that Peter was still holding against his chest. Peter’s heart was beating so fast that it nearly hurt. No matter how underserving of the jewellery he thought he was, Peter was terrified that Norman would actually change his mind and ask Peter to give it back. Would Peter be able to? And if he was, would he then manage to recover from having such an important part of Harry taken away from him? It would be like losing him for a second time. Peter was not sure he could take that.
“She gave it to Harry,” Norman finally said, sounding quieter than he normally would. “And we both know Harry would have never forgiven me if I was to keep it instead of giving it to you.”
Peter looked down at the box. Would Harry still have wanted him to have it despite what had happened? Norman certainly did seem so, but he had not been there. He had not heard what Harry had said to Peter, and he was not the one who had abandoned Harry in his last moment. Still, Peter could not bear the thought of giving the piece of jewellery back to Norman. Yes, Peter had failed Harry, but so had Norman. And he needed it. So much. Not being able to resist anymore, Peter opened the box.
As soon as Peter’s eyes fell onto the ring, he got assaulted by images of Harry all bloodied up. Peter was back to the moment when he had realised that it had been Harry, stuck into that goo, that it was Harry that he was killing. The horror he had felt then washed over him, and he nearly slammed the box shut. But he did not, he would not. Peter refused to let himself corrupt what that ring represented. He would not do that to Harry. He would rather rip his own brain out than let it taint what had been Harry’s most cherished possession. So, Peter took out the ring, stuffed the box into his pocket, and fought his shaking hands to put the chain accompanying the ring around his neck.
“Let me,” Norman said, stepping behind Peter and helping him close the chain.
The necklace’s weight settled and Peter knew right away that he was going to wear it as diligently as Harry had. It was now his most cherished possession. When Peter looked up from the ring, he found Norman standing in front of him and staring at the ring, but his mind seemed far away.
“She would have absolutely adored you, you know?” Norman told Peter whilst still staring at the ring. Would have she adored him? Peter really hoped so. “At least, she’s with Harry now.”
“Yeah, at least they’re together…” Peter found himself saying.
Peter had never believed in religion or in the afterlife in general. He had always based his belief on what science could prove. He liked it better that way, focusing on what humans knew for sure instead of what was said in a book. It was what made sense. However, right now, Peter wanted to believe that yes, Harry and his mother were together. Peter knew it was not true, as it did not make any scientific sense, but it was more comforting than the alternative. Maybe he could let himself believe in something made up this one time.
“Alright, I’ve got to go back.” Norman straightened up and Peter nodded. He was right, it would look too suspicious if they were to keep talking.
Peter watched Norman walk back inside the church. He knew that he should probably go back in as well, that his parents were probably worried about him… but Peter really did not want to. Being inside meant being surrounded by people who were expecting to feel and act a certain way, and that was simply too much. Peter could not handle that right now. He would have to put the mask back on at some point to hide his true pain from his parents, but he could not do it right now. So, Peter shot his parents a text and walked away.
Peter was not sure where he was supposed to go. He did not want to go back to his flat as his parents would probably meet him there. He could not go to Gwen’s either, not until they were certain that they were fully in the clear. For some reason, Peter felt as if he was not supposed to know where he was going. Not having a destination actually felt more… right, more correct. Of course he would wander aimlessly when he had lost his aim, when he had destroyed all that mattered. He had become a missionless soldier, a pawn left on the board when the game after the game had been lost.
As Peter got pulled into the spirals that were his thoughts, he became less and less aware of the world around him. It just felt so distant. So much so that he nearly walked straight into someone, stopping at the last second thanks to his reflexes.
“Sorry,” Peter mumbled before looking up to who he had nearly collided with.
It was Doctor Octavius. Peter frowned, what was he doing here? Peter looked around to see he had somehow made his way back to the campus. It made sense that his body would bring him back to the place he knew the best and had gotten used to wandering about. The church had not been too far from it, so Peter must have not walked that much. Unfortunately, bumping into someone he knew meant that Peter had to look somewhat alive again, and not completely overran with guilt.
“Sorry, I did not see you,” Peter said, doing his best imitation of whatever Doctor Octavius was expecting him to be.
“It’s alright.”
Doctor Octavius stepped back as he kept on staring at Peter. Peter could see worry on his old lecturer’s face. Peter knew it made sense for Doctor Octavius to be worried about him. Indeed, Harry’s death had been reported on and he was probably aware, like the rest of the world, that they had been together. So yeah, anyone who knew Peter was probably worried about him, even more so after seeing his ugly face deformed by all the guilt he was repressing. It did not mean that Peter enjoyed, or even liked, seeing that worry on the faces of those he met. He could only deal with Gwen being worried about him, that was it. She was the only one who could actually understand him and thus the only one who had the right to be worried. Other people’s worries felt oppressing as it would force Peter to bottle his feelings to match their expectations. It was torture, but maybe Peter deserved it. Peter did deserve to suffer after all.
“I’m sure you’ve heard this quite a few times already, but I want to offer you my sincerest condolences, Peter.”
Peter, who had adverted his eyes to let himself fall deep within his thoughts, sharply looked back at Doctor Octavius. No, no one had offered him their condolences yet. Were they supposed to? Gwen and Norman had been too busy dealing with things. Peter’s parents and family had been dealing with their own pain from losing Harry and had been too focused on being worried about how Peter was doing. Then, everyone else at the funeral had been strangers to him. What did it even mean to be offered condolences? Did it mean that someone was acknowledging that losing Harry had hurt and was hurting Peter? But they did not know how much it hurt, how much Peter hated himself, and how big the hole that Harry had left was. Peter did not even know how to reply to be offered those.
“If there is anything I can do, please do let me know,” Doctor Octavius then added.
“I don’t wanna go home…” Peter replied without thinking.
“Home?” Doctor Octavius gently asked.
“Back in Malibu…”
Despite how painful it was to be at MIT without Harry, Peter knew it would be even worse back at the Malibu villa. The last time Peter had been there, it had been with Harry. They had finally realised and confessed their feelings to each other, they had gone on their first date, they had learnt how to be a couple, they had been happy… It had been the last time they had been fully happy, without any lingering sadness. How could Peter face being haunted by such precious memories, all the while being watched by his parents? Even if they went to the tower in New York instead of the villa, he would be watched, every day, all day. And Gwen would not be there.
There was no doubt about it, Peter preferred being haunted here, at MIT. He still had some time left to spend here as he had an interview with the police scheduled in a few days and then final exams in a month, but a month was not enough. He needed more time. He did not want to go home for the summer. He had to stay here. Peter could not leave Harry behind again.
“It’s too late for you to apply for any funding but…” Doctor Octavius said, and Peter felt his heart start to beat faster. Was Doctor Octavius going to give him a way out of this? “If you are willing to do some unpaid work, you could assist me in my research. Once you’ve completed all of your classes and sat all of your exams, of course.”
“I am,” Peter quickly replied, scared that the researcher might change his mind if he was not fast enough. “I am, of course. I’d love to.”
Even if Peter had not been desperate to avoid going home for the summer he would have taken that offer in a heartbeat. Peter was privileged enough to not have to work during the summer. Thus, not getting paid whilst helping out with research was not an issue for him. He also loved learning new things and Doctor Octavius’ research sounded so interesting. He would have to a complete idiot to not jump on that opportunity even under normal circumstances. Then, taking into consideration how desperate Peter was to find an excuse to stay at MIT over the summer, this offer was Peter’s saving grace.
“I look forward to seeing how you’ll apply the things I’ve taught you in my class. Something tells me it’s going to be fun for the both of us.”
Peter nearly smiled. He had always had too much of a soft spot for that kind of validation. So, hearing Doctor Octavius, an MIT lecturer, say that was simply amazing. But then, Peter thought about how he had to tell Harry about this as soon as humanly possible, and everything became cold and painful again.
“Do take care of yourself in the meantime,” Doctor Octavius then added. “You won’t be any good as a research assistant if you don’t.”
Oh, really? Peter had not noticed that not sleeping and eating enough was making his brain as useful as an ostrich’s.
“Yes, Doctor,” Peter said, fighting a bitter smile.
Doctor Octavius offered him what seemed like a genuine smile and, after that, left Peter alone with his thoughts again. Peter should be relieved as he had an excuse to stay at MIT once the exams were over, but he did not. He just felt exhausted from forcing himself to look somewhat normal. It was okay, though. Peter just had to survive until the semester was over, his exams had been sat, and Gwen had been cleared. Then, he would be able to drown himself in Doctor Octavius’s research and have Gwen to lean on. He could do that, he could survive until then, right?
Notes:
Thank you so very much to my incredible beta reader and favourite artist yenshuii for this amazing art! You can find her on Bluesky.
This chapter’s title come from “The Fourth of July” by Sufjan Stevens.
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