Lunar Eclipse

by satanic_bipanic

Summary:

Blitzø marches back into the Palace to give the Prince a piece of his mind. He wants to talk? Fine. They're going to TALK.

Notes:

Yet another writer working their way through their feelings after watching THAT episode. Warning for smut in Ch3-4. Explicit language throughout because duh.

Chapter 1: Ask Me Again

“What...the...fuuuuuuuuuuuck!?!”

Blitzø’s eyes burned as he tried to wrap his head around everything that just happened. What the Heaven had really just happened?!

I need it back. Permanently.

I’ve made up my mind.

I have my answer.

...brave little imps...that sexy little one there...my dear commoners...impish little plaything...you little creatures...

“Fuck, fuck, fuck...” Blitzø paced back and forth on the familiar flagstones, grasping his horns with both hands. “Smug motherfucker! Just like that, after everything?!”

You know I don’t disappoint.

I can always do better.

“He didn’t even...he couldn’t give me a fucking minute, I-” 

I want you to stay here with me because you want to. Only, if you want to.

“So what, he wants me to be his little live-in plaything? Is that it?”

Oh, Stolas. I’ll stay with you. I love you sooo much...

Blitzø stopped in his tracks and squeezed his eyes shut tightly, more tears spilling down his mismatched cheeks. He clung to his anger like a life raft even as he felt himself slipping under, felt the despair and the guilt and the self-revulsion swallowing him whole. “No! He can’t just flip the script like that! He doesn’t get to do that!”

Why did you decide to ask me out, after all this time?

Thank you, Blitzø. For awakening me. For making me so happy, even if only for a little while.

Despite everything that happened, I enjoyed spending time with you.

I have wanted you for so long...

Well, I hope I’m qualified!

My first ever friend...

“We were dumbass kids you fuckin’ weird owl bitch!” He shouted up at Stolas’ balcony senselessly. He was certain the Prince was probably still down the hall in the ballroom. The ballroom... Blitzø remembered spinning, dizziness, the sweet honey-soaked cakes the imp butler had brought them threatening to come right back up. The imp butler that had looked at Blitzø with such disdain as he'd scarfed down too many. Fuck, he’d wanted to dig a hole and crawl into it. Kinda like he felt right now. He remembered that little hooting laugh. Stolas had always had such a cute laugh. Silly fuckin’ bird. He remembered that pink glow on grey plumage. That glow had come to mean something different all these decades later, or at least Blitzø had assumed it had. He thought back to LA, to the way Stolas had beamed at him as the soundstage burned around them and shit, he was certain that if he had anything on his stomach–honey-soaked or otherwise–it would’ve come right back up on the flagstones.

I’m not letting you, bitch! Let’s go!

Stolas, wait! I’m s-

“Fuck this.” Blitzø looked up at the balcony again, his tail swishing behind him. If we’re done, then I get to say my piece. He doesn’t get to make that decision for both of us. Privileged prick... He jumped over the bushes and reached out to grasp the trellis with both hands. He pulled himself up then paused. Blitzø caught sight of the crystal on his glove. For fuck’s sake, he hadn’t even given him a choice of where he wanted to wear the damn thing. Had it even come with instructions? “Y’know what? No.” 

Blitzø dropped back onto his hooves and balled up his fists, marching through the bushes and spitting out leaves as he strode up the stairs to the front door. He hadn’t entered the palace like this since he was ten. He hadn’t felt welcome since then, not really. And even when it was obvious that Stolas wanted him to be there–at least in his bedroom–he knew the freaky bird got a little thrill about him stealing in through the window under cover of night. He’d literally said so the first time, hadn’t he?

Blitzø, I think so very highly of you. I didn’t realize you think so low of me. 

Goodbye, Blitzø.

“God fuckin’ dammit.” Blitzø reared back and did a little jump so that his foot landed just above the doorknob, sending the heavy wood splintering and the great, wooden doors swinging open. He landed in the foyer on all fours. Yet another reminder of how small he was, how nothing in this house was made for him. Nothing about this house wanted him here.

He stomped up the stairs, teeth grinding. Fuck these stairs were steep. He wasn’t going to deign to use his hands to scrabble up them and he wasn’t going to cry, not again. Not yet. Not until he said what he needed to say. Blitzø reached up and took his mother’s pendant off, shoving it into his pocket and closing his fingers around it hard. Even through his glove he could feel the shape of it pressing into his palm. Blitzø withdrew his hand. He didn’t need that reminder right now. No, he needed to keep his shit together. And he needed to not look like another one of Stolas’ goddamn servants! He ripped off his bowtie, tossing it onto the marble floors as he reached the second floor landing. Now which way was the fuckin’...oh yeah. He turned to the right, no left. Yeah, it was definitely left past the creepy cute picture of Stolas as an owlet. Yeah.

Blitzø squared his shoulders as he walked down the corridor for the second time tonight, past the dustcloth covered portraits and furniture, towards the ballroom. This time when he walked in he wasn’t screaming, he wasn’t crying. Fuck, he wasn’t even that angry anymore...not when he saw Stolas like that. The Prince was crumpled right where he’d been when he sent Blitzø away. His crowned hat had tumbled off and was overturned a few feet away on the polished marble. His cape was drawn around his long, lean body that had curled in on itself. He could only tell torso from legs underneath the mass of ermine and velvet because he assumed the torso part was the part seizing with every gut wrenching sob.

Fuck. I did that. I fucked it up, just like I always do...

Still, there was a small part of him that felt...better knowing that Stolas was so upset. That was so fucked up but... Maybe dismissing him hadn’t been quite so easy. Maybe, just maybe he could fix this.

“You got a lotta stairs out there,” Blitzø said awkwardly, feeling weird about just watching the Prince cry when he couldn’t go to him, couldn’t do anything to stop it. He heard the sharp inhale and avian squawk of surprise before four crimson eyes and a mess of disheveled feathers peeked out from under the cape to blink at him. “Took me a minute to get up here but next time you want to get rid of me, send me further away.”

“B-Blitzø?”

“Duh. We gonna finish this fight or do you need to cry some more, bitch?”

“I...” Stolas took a moment to gather himself, leaning up and attempting fruitlessly to fix his smeared makeup and rumpled clothes even though he was still sitting on the cold floor. Even an absolute fucking mess he was still so majestic. Beautiful. “I don’t think there’s anything left to say, Blitzø.”

“Like fuck there isn’t. I was literally in the middle of a sentence when you threw me out on my little red ass!” Blitzø sucked in a breath and exhaled. Don’t fucking yell. Don’t fucking yell.

“I thought that we had both made ourselves clear and I didn’t want you to see me, well...like this.” He gestured to his everything.

“Bitch, please. Your makeup has gotten way more fucked up from when I-” Stolas cringed and Blitzø stopped short. Sex was off limits, apparently. Great. That was like ninety-eight percent of their interactions to date. “Besides, I’ve seen you without it. You look...” Gorgeous. Beautiful. Elegant. “Fine. With or without it.”

Stolas cleared his throat softly and straightened his spine, summoning all of his dignity. “Thank you, Blitzø. But that wasn’t my primary concern. Why...why are you here?”

“To finish my fucking sentence,” Blitzø said. His tone still had a bite to it but at least it wasn’t loud. That was progress, right? “I’m sorry. That’s what I was trying to say. I’m sorry for making you think that I...that I think that about you and that I...fuck, that’s not...I’m saying the same like six words in different orders, aren’t I?” He swiped a hand down his face and attempted to organize his thoughts. “You really threw me a curveball today, you know that?”

“Yes, I’m realizing that. I didn’t...think that I had been particularly subtle about my feelings, Blitzø. Perhaps you just hadn’t been paying attention...”

“Oh, fuck off. Don’t do that shit or I’ll take my apology right the fuck back. I pay attention. I pay attention when you tell me the names of all of your scary-ass fucking imp-eating plants.”

“They don’t-”

“What happened to that valet, again?” Blitzø narrowed his eyes. “Vip or Nip or whatever? The one Gertrude ate.”

“Kip. That was an accident. He never should’ve been in the greenhouse before feeding time...”

“Uh-huh. Right. I pay attention to you when you talk about clothes and books and music and all that dumb shit you like. Fuck, do you have any idea how much I know about constellations now? Constellations we don't even have because this is fucking Hell? I know how you like your tea, I know how Via is doing in school, and you fucking know that I know how to play that puss like a fucking violin! I know a lot and if it’s all just sex shit and pillow talk that’s because that’s all we fucking do!” Blitzø threw his hands in the air. “You have called me exactly twice for non-fucking reasons: Loo Loo Land which, admit it, you were hoping would end in fucking...”

“Blitzø...”

“Admit it, or I’m walking out.”

“Alright. Yes, I rather hoped that afterwards we might...”

“Thought so. Glad to be on the same fucking page. Pun intended. And the second was when you were kidnapped.” Stolas blinked a few times.

“Yes, I realize that was inconvenient timing. I do apologize, Blitzø but I-”

“Fuck.” Blitzø took a step forward, his eyes shining. “Stolas, you don’t have a fucking clue how bad you fucked me up that day, do you?”

Stolas’ eyes all turned upwards at the center of his heart-shaped face. “I’m sorry? I fucked you up? I was in the hospital for weeks, Blitzø.”

“Yeah, you were. Because I couldn’t...I didn’t do anything to save you. Because your stupid feathered ass called me instead of any of the other ridiculously powerful creepy kaiju monsters you’re friends with. Me. You trusted me to help you and I fucked that right up. I didn’t even know that you could get hurt—fuck, that’s a lie.” His eyes dropped to the floor. “I knew that Striker, ughhhhh fuck, Stols! He tried to kill you in Wrath at the Harvest Moon Festival and I didn’t tell you. I didn’t want you to get freaked out and, well, honestly I didn’t want you to ask me to protect you every goddamn time you left this freakshow of a palace so I figured: case closed once we kicked his ass. I had no fucking idea that it was Stella who hired him. I had no fucking idea.” His voice broke and he felt his chest crack open along with it. He took a few deep breaths before he could bring himself to look back up at Stolas’ wide, shocked expression. “I didn’t visit you in the hospital because...what was the point? I’m no good at healing, or at making people feel better. Shit, ask Loony. She's in a like constant state of sad-angry and I can't do shit to help. I’m really good at two things and there was no one to kill in that hospital room,” he held up one finger, quickly joined by a second, “and I was pretty sure you weren’t in any condition for a deep dicking. So I spared us both the embarrassment of me trying to make you laugh and you pretending that I’m not a colossal fucking disappointment.”

“Oh, Blitzø...” Stolas pressed a hand to his chest. “Blitzø, do you know what would’ve happened if your employees hadn’t saved me that day? Striker was going to cut my eyeballs out as a bloody souvenir and then deliver me to Stella and her absolute cunt of a brother, likely so that I could be forced to sign some ridiculous version of our divorce paperwork that would’ve ruined Via’s financial future. And then...well, who knows. You did save me, Blitzø. Just because you were prioritizing your daughter, which I would do over everyone else myself...that doesn’t mean that you didn’t save me. I didn’t need a knight in shining armor that day, you took care of that. I just needed...I wanted to see you when I was hurting. Because you do make me laugh. Heavens, Blitzø...you’re the only one who has ever made me really, really laugh ever since we were children. You make me laugh, and smile, and feel like maybe I’m not quite so worthless. So please, if you have any respect at all for how I feel about you...don’t ever say that you are a disappointment again. Not to me. Have I been disappointed by you? Certainly, as I am quite certain the reverse is true as well. But I have never, not once, thought that you were anything short of genuinely magnificent.”

“But that’s just it...” Blitzø groaned and paced again, finding Stolas’ words as tough to swallow as a dry horse tranq. “You put me on this pedestal because you’ve had this fucking crush since we were kids and that isn’t me. Not even a little bit. You have no idea what’s happened between then and now, and you don’t really know me, Stols. You can’t say that you care about me when you don’t know me. You see what I want you to see, you see the-the,” Blitzø began imitating Stolas’ posh accent, “plucky little imp that made quite a name for himself.” He narrowed his eyes and dropped the affectation. “And that’s another thing, while we’re fighting: you call me little a lot. A whole fucking lot. I get it, you’re freakishly big but I’m actually pretty fucking tall for an imp and it’s really fucked up that you-”

“I’m sorry.” Stolas drew his legs beneath himself and folded both hands in his lap. “I am sorry, Blitzø. You are very correct, I do say that often. I find you frankly adorable, but that is only a small part of the things that I adore about you...and I can understand how infantilizing that might be-”

“Smaller words, birdy.”

“How it...might make you feel less than,” Stolas said carefully. “That was never my intention but that was part of what I was trying to explain earlier, with the crystal.” Blitzø looked down at his arm to the gleaming orange stone. “I realized that I was so lost in what I wished this could be, what it was for me–a great romance, a love affair, perhaps even a love that could outlast the affair–that I wasn’t even certain that it was altogether consensual. I obligated you to-to touch me. That is abuse, by any and every possible definition. And I am reluctant to put it in those terms aloud because not only does that make me a monster but I’m afraid that it will just compound the problem by making you feel...small. Powerless. But it isn’t that you are powerless, Blitzø. Not by any means. It’s that I am so powerful, and that is a thing that I have very much taken for granted.”

“You know that makes you sound like a prick, right?” Blitzø said out of the corner of his mouth, his cheeks turning dusky grey.

“Oh, I am exceedingly aware. I fear that I have bungled this quite irreparably, but it is so so important to me that you know, that you believe that you are important to me, Blitzø. That I care so very much for you, and that it is not just some...some joke.”

“I didn’t think it was a joke and I wasn’t making fun of you, before,” Blitzø said. “I just thought it was another sex thing because–hey, before you get your feathers in a twist I need you to listen, okay?” He leveled his gaze on Stolas and, reluctantly, the Prince nodded. “Every time we talk it’s “Blitzy, I love your big red dick”, “Blitzy, I want to swallow your piping hot cum”, “Blitzy, I’m so w-”

“Yes, I...I rather get the gist,” Stolas said gently. “I thought you liked that kind of talk.”

“Maybe sometimes, like...in bed. In the heat of the moment, during a scene. But you call me in the middle of the day at work and say that shit, Stolas. You say it in public. In front of my employees, people that I need to respect me. You pinch my cheek and you call me little and Blitzy and talk about my dick all the goddamn time! Then you fuckin’ pull the rug out from under me and say this isn’t about sex and I’m the asshole? Come on, man! I don’t know which way is up right now.”

Stolas opened his beak and then shut it abruptly with a click. A tense moment passed before he let out a little tittering laugh. “The fuck, Stolas? This is funny to you?” That little laugh grew into a series of uncontrollable hoots that he tried to stifle with one hand.

“Oh, oh I am sorry, Blitzø!” Stolas chuckled. “Truly, I'm not laughing at you but at myself. I am such an idiot, darling.” He paused, expression growing serious. “Apologies. That just slipped out. I...”

“It's fine. Explain, don't get distracted.” Blitzø waved off the endearment the way he always did and Stolas, much sobered now, continued.

“I have only ever been with Stella, Blitzø. And only twice. Our wedding night and once more when we realized that hadn't been sufficient for conception.”

“Yikes, and I thought I was unromantic,” Blitzø grumbled.

“Quite.” Stolas let out another little laugh though this one contained far less mirth. “So you see, everything I knew about sex before we met I learned from, well, fiction. I could never really get past the reality of pornography but you know that I love my books...”

“Yeah, all that kinky pirate porn book shit you read? I know. Some of it's kinda hot. Filthy.”

“Well, between that and our encounters I...oh, Blitzø. I only talked like that all the time because I thought that was what you wanted. And I did so want you to want me.”

Did?! Did. Not “do”. Blitzø rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “While we're talking about that night...I didn't come here to seduce you.”

“Oh, I'm quite aware of that. I know that you wanted the book and ideally you would've come and gone with no one being the wiser.” Stolas tilted his head to one side. “Did you remember me at all, Blitzø?”

“Of course I did.” Blitzø took another step forward. They were almost eye to eye like this, with Stolas sitting on the floor. “How the fuck do you think I knew you had the book, and where I'd probably find it? I remember everything about that day. You think an imp like me gets a look inside a place like this–fuck, the kinda life you lead–all the time? Someone as scary as you who has everything you have and is still so goddamn nice? You aren’t easy to forget, Stolas.”

“So you came to play pirate again.” Stolas' smile was soft and heartbreakingly sad but Blitzø preferred it to his tears. It was a start.

“Heh, kinda...” Blitzø shuffled his feet and looked down at them. “Look, I told you already: I’m good at two things. And I needed the book and I didn’t want to hurt you and you were so flustered and tall and pretty and I thought “I’ll tie him up and get the fuck out before he catches me” and then...”

“And then I guilted you into staying,” Stolas said softly. “Strange how it’s all so painfully clear to me, now. From the very start we were dancing to two completely different tunes.”

“I mean, maybe at first but come on...look, I know I was a bitch about it a lot of the time but you know I enjoyed it, right? A fucking lot. You understand that I want you every time, don't you?” Blitzø took another tentative step closer to Stolas and the owl seemed to suddenly realize just how close. His eyes widened in a way that might’ve been comical in any other situation.

“I...will admit that it is an immense relief to hear that,” Stolas exhaled as he spoke. “I am going to assume that you’re telling the truth because you have nothing to be gained from any further deception. Neither of us do, I suppose.”

“Iiiiisn’t that kind of a good thing? Cards on the table, y’know?” Blitzø suggested. “You and I were definitely not on the same page before. That much is pretty obvious. But that doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be...” he said cautiously. “I just needed... need some time. And if you want to do this for real, I am definitely going to do dumb shit like this all the time so you’re going to have to cope with it without teleporting me the fuck outside!”

“Blitzø...” Stolas’ heart was absolute thunder. “What are you saying?”

“Fuuuuuck.” He tilted his head back and then swung it forward again to meet Stolas’ dominant eyes. His own were brimming with tears as he struggled to find the right words. The words that would get Stolas to ask him to stay one more time. The truth. “I’m saying that it’s not just sex for me, either. I don’t know what it is. What we are or could be or fuck, should be. But...it’s not just sex and it was never just about the book. Not since that first night.”

“Oh, darling...” Stolas’ feathers fluffed up in delight before his expression settled back into one of concern and sadness. “You aren’t just saying this because it’s what you think I want to hear, are you?”

“Fuck, no. You said it yourself, we don’t have anything to gain from lies right now because if I’m lying that means that I’m doing it to get you in bed which means that I do want to fuck you which means that I’m not lying. It’s a pair-a-whatever,” Blitzø said confidently.

“Paradox,” Stolas chuckled warmly.

“Yeah, that.” He took the final step forward, closing the distance between them. He reached up slowly, like he was trying to bridle a skittish horse. Blitzø clasped both hands on either side of Stolas’ face. “Ask me again.”

“Ask what?” Stolas’ voice was barely more than a croaking sound as his chest constricted in dangerous, brilliant, wonderful hope.

“You fucking know what. Ask me to stay because I want to.”

 

Chapter 2: I Fuckin' Missed You

Summary:

Now it's Stolas' turn to say his piece. Both of them share their recollections of the day they met and they both gain new insights.

Notes:

Okay, I know I said smut in Chapter 2 but the dialogue definitely got away from me here and I didn't want the word count to get too long. So there will be a Chapter 3!

“Ask me again.”

“Ask what?” Stolas’ voice was barely more than a croaking sound as his chest constricted in dangerous, wonderful hope.

“You fucking know what. Ask me to stay because I want to.”

Stolas took a deep breath, willing his heart to calm down and his beak to stop trembling from the sheer delight of having Blitz’s hands on him. He had been so certain that he would never feel that touch again and Heavens it had been so long... 

He cleared his throat softly. “Blitzø...if you want to stay, please... please do. I-I want you to.”

“Okay, good...” Stolas hated how even the slightest bit of praise from Blitzø in that voice had him squeezing his thighs together. “Now tell me what you really want, birdy...” Blitzø’s eyes closed halfway and he leaned a fraction closer. Stolas mirrored his actions out of instinct, his body conditioned to respond to his cues even as alarm bells went off in his head.

“I want...I would like, that is I’ve been hoping that-”

“Stolas. Spit it out.”

“I want you to be with me, really be with me. I want us to be a couple. Together, partners. I dream of us having a future together, of being as important to you as you are to me because you... goodness, Blitzø...” His voice broke and he leaned his cheek further into Blitzø's palm. “You are just so breathtaking in so many ways and I want to spend my time getting to know every single one of them.”

“Wow.” Blitzø’s eyes were wide open now. “Shit, Stols...”

“I’m sorry if I...overwhelmed you but you did ask you kn-oh!” Blitzø's mouth covered Stolas’ in a desperate kiss. Stolas made a soft, broken sound and Blitzø took advantage, thrusting his forked tongue forward to tangle with Stolas' in a very familiar dance. It was a struggle not to follow his lead, to lean in and perform all of the steps he knew would end in such bliss. Could he? Should he?

“Blitzø...” Stolas gasped.

“You can call me Blitzy, baby.”

What? Wait...no. No, this isn't right. Not like this...

Stolas pressed one palm against Blitzø's chest and pushed him back gently, then more firmly when he didn't get the message. Finally he shoved the stubborn imp and held him at arm's length, both demons breathing hard.

“W-what? What did I do?” The fear in Blitzø's eyes was almost enough to compel Stolas to pull him close again; to smother him in kisses and touches and sweet words until he never thought the obviously horrible lies he was thinking about himself ever, ever again.

“Now who is pulling the rug out, darling?” Stolas’ voice was uncharacteristically rough. “I don’t think that this is a good idea.”

Blitzø groaned and took both of Stolas' hands in his, his tail wrapping defensively around his own legs. “Come on. I'm staying, aren't I? Because I want to. With you.”

“Yes, but you haven't said what you want from this. In fact, you said that you haven't the first clue what you want from this and I cannot...” Stolas took a calming breath and sighed, turning Blitzø's hands over in his and pressing his forehead against them before releasing him. “You've said a great deal about how I've made you feel, Blitzø. May I say something?”

“Not like I can stop you,” Blitzø groused. He waved one hand as if to say “go on” before planting it on his hip.

“I do apologize, so very very sincerely, for ever making you feel like a sex object. I apologize for all of the embarrassing dirty talk and for all of the insensitive comments about imps and most sincerely for calling you a-a plaything. ” Stolas' voice trembled, as did his hands, but he forced himself to go on. “But I have tried, Blitzø. I told you that I didn’t think I was being particularly subtle, and frankly...I wasn’t. I suggested that we do things other than sex often. I called you, often. I texted you constantly.”

“Yeah, but we always just ended up fucking...”

“Yes. Because you initiated sex and Heavens, Blitzø...I don’t have anywhere near the necessary willpower to resist when you say that you want me or you look at me like...like...” Stolas stammered as Blitzø approached him again, his tail unwound and swishing, a smirk pulling at his lips and revealing a row of fangs. His eyes glowed saffron in the low, crimson light and Stolas ached right down to his core.

“Like?”

“Oh, you-” Stolas clicked his tongue and looked away, face flushed. “Like that. Obviously. You were correct when you said that I’ve had a crush on you since we were children, but it’s so much more than that...”

“Yeah, puberty’ll do that to ya.”

“No! Ugh, will you let me finish?!” Stolas narrowed his eyes and looked back at Blitzø who dropped the smolder immediately. He nodded, widening his glowing eyes and listening. Actually listening.

“You took a little piece of me with you when you left that day, and I’m not talking about all of the ridiculous knick-knacks you stole.” Stolas looked stern for half a heartbeat before his expression softened and opened, his own ruby eyes round and vulnerable. “I didn’t stop thinking about you for years, Blitzø. Wondering what you were doing, whether or not you had managed to live your dreams, wondering if you had found love, if you were happy. I so very much hoped that you were happy. Happier than I was, certainly. If you could be happy, then I could find some comfort in that. I’m not completely naive, despite all evidence to the contrary. I knew that the likelihood of us ever meeting again was so minute it was unfathomable, and I knew that even if we somehow did we would never be friends. Not really, not with the world of difference between us.”

Blitzø looked away and Stolas couldn’t help himself. He reached out and cradled the imp’s chin, gently turning those eyes back towards him. “And then when I was feeling at my lowest, there you were. Sneaking into my room, crashing that damned party that Stella threw just to humiliate me. And you had your big office and your business and everything and I... Oh Blitzø. I had resigned myself to adoring you from afar but there you were and it was like you brought that piece of me back with you. Like I could remember who I had been before all of this,” Stolas gestured to the palace around them vaguely, “ruined me. I know now that day, my birthday when we were children, it didn’t mean the same thing to you that it did to me. I know that our affair hasn’t meant the same thing to you that it has to me. And I...accept that. I was wrong to think that we can’t overcome the world of difference between us because I no longer give a fuck what anyone thinks about my feelings for you. Octavia’s future is secured, I’ve seen to that. That’s all that matters. Not my social standing or this ridiculous Palace. I’ll be glad to be rid of it. But I cannot, I will not go on without knowing what I am to you. And I think that is something that you still need to figure out for yourself...”

“Pfft.” Blitzø rubbed his face with both hands. “That’s not the part I need to figure out, you dumb bird. You wanna talk about ruined? Have you looked at me?”

Stolas tilted his head to one side and blinked. “Your scars? Oh, Blitzø...you know that doesn’t do a thing to detract from how-”

“Yeah, I didn’t say that I wasn’t sexy. I said that I was ruined, Stolas.” Blitzø took a breath and sighed. “You asked me about them once. You remember that?”

“I do.” Stolas chose his words carefully, feeling like he was standing on a very precarious cliff just then. “As I recall you told me that it was none of my fucking business and, well, you were right.”

“Right. And it still isn’t. And I’m not going to talk about it again so don’t ask. Ever. But...there was a fire. And it was my fault. And this?” He gestured at his harlequin face. “This isn’t the worst thing that happened to me because of that fucking fire. Not by a long shot. I lost everything that day. So I’m sorry to burst your bubble but I was definitely not happy. I am fucked up, Stols. I am so fucked up and I am...you’re right, you’ve told me again and again how much I mean to you in your own way and Fizz was right, no one would go through all of this trouble just for my dick no matter how good it is. So I just don’t fucking get it! You’re great. You’re so fucking pretty and smart as shit and powerful and rich and you’ve got those legs and that voice and you can be so damn funny when you let yourself be, and now that you got rid of that twat you could have anyone you wanted and I have been trying so hard for months and months not to think too hard about how fucking great you are because you aren’t meant for someone like me! I. Don’t. Get. It.”

Stolas felt his heart break and then mend back together and then break again as Blitzø stripped himself bare to give the Prince a glimpse behind all of that swagger and bravado. And Heavens if he didn’t fall even deeper into that hopeless chasm of his feelings for the imp with every word. “You don’t need to,” Stolas said finally. “Truly, I can’t fathom why you would want to spend time with me without the incentive of our arrangement. I hope and I dream and I yearn and I wish but I don’t understand. I look at myself and I see...well, what I see is not worth your time. I wish so much that you could see yourself the way that I see you, darling. And I so wish that I knew how you saw me...”

Blitzø looked around uncomfortably for a moment, his eyes flicking everywhere but at Stolas’ pleading expression. Just when the swelling warmth in Stolas’ chest began to deflate, Blitzø pulled his chin from his grasp and walked towards the cloaked chandelier in the center of the room. He jumped with a little grunt and grasped onto the dustcloth, pulling it with him as he dropped back down to his feet. With a pretty, tinkling sound the gems were uncovered and the way that they caught the hellish red glow of the sky in the empty ballroom took Stolas’ breath away.

“Then let me tell you what I remember about that day,” Blitzø said. “I remember my dad telling me that he sold me as a playmate. Playmate, plaything...whatever.” Stolas winced. Fuck, he’d never even considered... “I remember him telling me that I had to steal from you; that I had to do it for our family. I remember asking what would happen if I got caught... What would’ve happened, Stols? If your dad had caught me chucking all that shit out the window?”

Stolas blinked rapidly. “Well, I uh...can’t imagine that he would’ve taken it terribly well. Ridiculous, really, considering how long it took for anyone to even notice anything was missing...”

“Uh-huh, I’m going to assume that means he would’ve fed me to one of your freaky imp-eating plants without thinking twice about it,” Blitzø snarked. “Unless you have like a dungeon or something—wait, do you have a dungeon?!”

“No. We don’t have a dungeon.” Stolas allowed himself the tiniest little smirk. “You only need a dungeon when you take prisoners alive, darling. And then whatever would the plants eat?” His heart soared when the imp burst out laughing, dropping the cloth to the ground and clutching his sides. Their shared, macabre sense of humor was one of a thousand things that Stolas adored about their time together. “I would never have let him catch you, Blitzø. Surely you know that.”

“I mean, maybe I believe that now but then? Fuck no, I didn’t know that! I was scared shitless,” Blitzø said. “That’s my memory of that day: embarrassing the fuck out of myself at the circus when I couldn’t make a goddamn horse with fucking legs, getting sold off to weird rich bird people, being terrified that they were going to eat me or something for most of the day...”

“I see.” Stolas lowered his beak sadly. “Well, as I said...I know that day doesn’t mean to you what it did to me and-”

“Let me finish my story, bitch. Goddamn.” Blitzø took a few steps forward and gestured wildly with both hands, effectively silencing Stolas. “I also remember a fluffy little kid that laughed at my legless horse jokes and who bowed at me and got the shit slapped out of him for it. You still do that, by the way. I mean, I guess no one would have the balls to slap you upside the head for it now but I’m pretty sure that you still aren’t supposed to bow to me,” Blitzø chuckled and Stolas’ face warmed. “I remember almost throwing up on this floor from spinning around like dumbasses. I remember telling you shit that I hadn’t even told Fizz or Barbie or my mom, about what I wanted to be one day. Fizz was always the better clown, I knew that. The better everything. I knew everyone would laugh at the idea that I could be...well, anything special. And you laughed too, but, ah shit I can’t explain it. It was just different. It didn’t make me feel shitty when you laughed. It made me feel...bold. Badass.” 

Blitzø walked back to the chandelier and Stolas followed every step, transfixed. He was terrified to speak lest he break the spell and make Blitzø shut all of this back inside again. In his dreams and fantasies Blitzø often said romantic things, declarations of love like the ones he’d feigned earlier when he thought this was just a game to Stolas. But even in his wildest imaginings Blitzø was never this unguarded. The imp reached out to the chandelier and touched one of the dangling strings of prismatic gemstones that was a good deal shorter than those around it. 

“I kept this. No fucking clue why...probably could’ve sold it for a shitload of cash that I definitely could’ve used. My old man took the rest of the stuff and hocked it for booze money. Not the food and tent and shit he said it was for. Even back then I can’t say that I was super surprised. Maybe that’s why I didn’t give it to him. It felt gross to have this memory sitting in a pawn shop or whatever. I lost it, y’know, in the fire. I had forgotten about it by then, honestly...I think it was in the crate under my bed with all the rest of my crap but I’m not really sure. But I did keep it.” Blitzø dropped his hand and looked back at Stolas. “You wanna know what I think of you? Apart from all the shit I said about how damn pretty and smart and funny and a great lay and shit you are... You’re right. Maybe we’ve been out of step from day one because I definitely didn’t get all mushy over you back then, but it still mattered. You matter, Stols. To me. And maybe I didn’t pine for you and shit but I...” After a moment of clear hesitation, of balling up his fist and releasing it only to ball it up again, Blitzø held that hand out with an earnest, hopeful look in his eyes that left Stolas so dizzy he wasn’t certain that he trusted his legs to work properly. “I fuckin’ missed you.”

Stolas mustered all of the grace he could manage to stand; his heart was positively pounding and his tongue was stuck to the roof of his mouth and his mind was buzzing and, embarrassingly, his thighs were slick in his trousers. He walked towards Blitzø slowly, one clawed foot in front of the other as he savored this precious moment, committing every detail to memory. When he reached the chandelier he held out his hand, sliding his fingers over Blitzø’s palm. “Please, say it again.”

“I fuckin’ missed you, birdy.” Blitzø’s fingers closed around Stolas’ and squeezed, yanking the Prince forward until they were standing close enough that Blitzø had to tilt his head all the way back to look up and meet Stolas’ gaze.

“Oh, Blitzø...” Stolas reached up with his free hand and stroked the curve of one of his horns. “I love you. I love you so much, darling, and believe me it terrifies me as well but I simply can’t not love you...” Stolas knew that he was babbling but he couldn’t bring himself to be embarrassed, not when the light was shining like this and Blitzø was looking at him like this and everything, everything he’d ever wanted was right there just waiting for him to grasp it. And then Blitzø gritted his teeth and looked down and everything shattered. Panicked, Stolas scrambled to pick up the pieces. “I didn’t mean...you don’t have to...I’m sorry, that was too much. I don’t expect–”

“I can’t.” Blitzø sighed in frustration. “I can’t put that kind of shit into words like you can.” He looked up at Stolas and reached for him in that way that had Stolas bending at the waist immediately, desperate to feel his touch. When the owl’s face was low enough Blitzø caressed his cheek with his thumb and then wrapped his clawed hand around the back of Stolas’ neck. His voice deepened and softened all at once. “So will you let me show you?”

Oh. Oh my... Stolas felt his resolve crumble instantly. They still hadn’t defined quite what this was but Stolas had said the words he’d been keeping inside for months and Blitzø...well, he hadn’t run from them. That was good enough for now. In fact, somehow this was better than the sweeping romance Stolas had imagined because this was real. This was something he could feel. As he dropped to his knees and closed his eyes Blitzø closed the distance between them and Stolas opened his beak obediently. But he wasn’t greeted with the messy, lusty, hungry kisses that he was accustomed to; no, this was altogether something different. Blitzø’s lips slid against his beak softly, his tongue curling and caressing instead of tangling with Stolas’. That hand around his neck squeezed and stroked between his feathers and Stolas let out a quiet sob against Blitzø’s mouth because it was so perfect.

They could spend a thousand years together and Stolas would never need to hear the words from Blitzø’s lips because he could feel them in his kiss.

 

Chapter 3: I Always Want You, Darling

Summary:

Stolas and Blitzø finally talk about that night at Ozzie's and take the first steps forwards...

 

Stolas could have lived in that kiss forever, surviving by breathing in Blitzø's puffed breaths and drinking in the taste of his lips. When Blitzø broke away Stolas chased his mouth with a whimper, feeling like he was drowning without it. Panic clawed its way up his throat as a terrible thought gripped him: was that a goodbye kiss?

“Slow down, birdy. I want to take my time.” Blitzø's voice was soft but there was an edge to it that Stolas was all too familiar with. He'd never dared to put a word to it –never let himself hope– but now clarity blindsided him as Blitzø kissed his cheeks and his closed eyes tenderly. Desire. It’s desire.

“Oh, Blitzø...” Stolas shuddered at the promise in that tone, overwhelmed by the feeling of being wanted without the performative aspects of their previous trysts. He knew his lover’s touch like it was his own at this point but tonight there was a special thrill in each brush of his lips because he’d so very nearly lost this. He’d come so close, in his own depressive self-centered, arrogant, stupid-

“Hey.” Stolas’ eyes snapped open when Blitzø cupped his chin and lifted it slightly, meeting his gaze. “Stay with me, Stols. Right here. Fuck all the rest of that shit right now.” Stolas’ expression softened immediately at the warmth he found in those softly glowing eyes.

Blitzø’s hand trailed from his chin down his throat to his collar and Stolas swallowed visibly as those red fingers unfastened his cape and pushed it off of his shoulders. Blitzø pulled away and spread the lush velvet out on top of the discarded dust cloth, brow furrowing as he arranged the makeshift bedding carefully. Stolas was grasping for a comment about the sweet gesture when Blitzø seized him by the shoulders. He let out a little squeak of surprise as he was lowered onto the bedding. Blitzø gave him a wicked grin, his grip strong but shockingly gentle. Stolas stretched his long limbs out on the cushioned marble floor and looked up at Blitzø with a deep flush painting his cheeks. The imp crouched between his thighs, hands smoothing up his lean torso to begin unbuttoning his clothes with practiced ease when Stolas covered both of those gloved hands with his own.

“Darling, I... Heavens, you know that I want to. That I want you, but we really don’t have to do this. If you never touched me again I would-” Blitzø’s finger pressed against Stolas’ beak and the owl blinked in surprise, falling silent.

“Yeah, you might be fine with that but I’m not.” Blitzø said bluntly. “I never wanted to give up what we had...I just wasn’t sure I was ready for it to be something else. Honestly I-I’m still not. But I want to be ready, Stols. Fuck, never in a million years did I think that you’d actually want to do this for real. I mean, maybe you’d want to in your bird-brained fantasy land but not in reality where all of your royal friends will flip their shit and everyone will stare at us and wonder what the fuck you're doing with someone like me...”

“I don’t-”

“Yeah, yeah, spare me the species-blind bullshit. You said it yourself. There’s a world of difference between you and this,” Blitzø pointed at his own chest and then put his palm back on Stolas’ chest where the owl immediately grasped again with his own, squeezing.

“And I told you that I don’t care!” Stolas’ voice was just a bit too loud and it echoed around the empty ballroom, forcing him to wait for the reverberation to stop before continuing at a more reasonable volume. He clasped Blitzø's hands tightly, clutching them to his chest. His wide, ruby eyes pleaded to be believed. For Blitzø to understand just how deeply these feelings ran within him. “I was so wrong, Blitzø. I don’t care what anyone thinks of my divorce and I certainly don’t care what anyone thinks of my feelings for you.” Blitzø snorted and rolled his eyes. Leave it to Stolas to ignore the real world in such dramatic fashion. Damn him, it was so fucking cute. Stolas clicked his tongue angrily and Blitzø met his eyes again, finding a quiet fierceness there; a hint of the true demon inside that he’d only ever really seen once... when Blitzø was in danger. “That doesn’t mean that I don’t care or see that this might be difficult. That life, for you, as an imp is difficult. That this world doesn’t think very highly of your kind, much less understand that you are truly, beautifully exceptional. Not exceptional for an imp; just exceptional. But the very least that I can do is stand with you and remind you of how truly magnificent you are, as often as you’ll allow.”

Oh fuck. Blitzø’s lower lip quivered slightly and he sniffed loudly, pulling himself together with a few rapid blinks. “Fuck, maybe we should go back to the dirty talk. That shit didn’t make me cry like a bitch.” He sniffed again. “I never even let myself think about what that would be like...you and me, out in the open. For real.” He smiled down at Stolas, aiming for sexy and mischievous but landing more firmly in sweet and loving territory. Damn his stupid, expressive eyes. “But I’m thinking about it now.” 

Let’s get back to the good stuff...the stuff I’m good at. Please.

Stolas loosened his grip slowly and Blitzø’s hands resumed disrobing Stolas one complicated piece of royal finery at a time. The Prince was already breathless even before Blitzø peeled open his tunic and sank his claws into the fluffy plumage on his chest. He hooted softly in delight, especially when the imp leaned down to brush his cheek against the softness of his feathers. He had to fight the urge to wrap his arms around Blitzø and keep him right there forever. He swallowed thickly in the silence, resistant to break it but unable to help himself. “And?”

“Huh?” Blitzø didn't look up from nuzzling his chest, both hands wrapping around Stolas' waist and gripping him tightly in a way that threw fuel on the growing fire between the owl’s thighs. He was so conflicted, torn between the increasingly urgent needs of his body and the equally pressing compulsion to finish this conversation. Hope compelled him to continue.

“You said that you were thinking about what the two of us –together– would be like. In the open, as-as a couple, and–” He gasped when Blitzø dragged his snout up to Stolas’ neck. He rolled his head to the side instinctively, submitting fully.

Oh goddammit.

“And... I dunno, Stols. It sounds nice. It also sounds like trouble, mostly for you,” Blitzø said against the shorter feathers beneath his jaw.

Stolas brought one hand to the back of Blitzø’s head, long fingers slotting between his spikes. “Darling, what ever is all of this power for if I can’t weather a little bullshit for the demon I love?”

Blitzø didn’t want to ask. He really, really, really didn’t. He wanted to sink his fangs into that spot that he knew would make Stolas’ overclocked brain flatline; to tear off their clothes and lose himself in the tight, wet perfection of his body. So why the fuck was he opening his stupid, goddamn mouth?! Blitzø squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his forehead to the floor next to Stolas. “What about Via? You can’t tell me that you don’t care what she thinks.”

Silence fell over the ballroom and with every soft, panted breath from Stolas Blitzø became more and more certain that those words had spelled out their death sentence. Stolas would realize how impossible this was and end things for real. Now that they’d said all of this and un-fucking-burdened themselves and talked about all of their memories and insecurities and stupid goddamn feelings there was no way they could go back to just screwing. If it had ever even been just screwing. Fuck, this is why he didn’t do this feelings bullshit! Shit always blew up in his face and Christ’s titties, this one was going to hurt.

When Stolas finally spoke his tone was gut-wrenchingly gentle. It was just the kind of voice he’d expect the sentimental ass bird to use to let him down nice and easy. “Blitzø, I have tried to respect your insistence that we not speak about that night, but...” 

“Ah fuck me, not this bullshit. Remind me to slap the shit outta Fizz next time I see him.”

“...what Asmodeus said, I feel that I need to clarify a few things.” Stolas’ hand slid down to Blitzø’s shoulder and gingerly pulled him from his hiding spot near Stolas’ neck. Blitzø’s teeth were clenched and he tried to look everywhere but at Stolas. The Prince waited patiently and eventually he acquiesced, realizing that the damn bird wouldn’t continue until he sucked it up and met those probing eyes. “Asmodeus’ motives are quite clear in hindsight, trying to deflect attention from his own feelings for his impish love by trying to make me feel ashamed for my own. The hypocrisy of it all...” Stolas huffed and there was that spark of anger again, the hint of terrifying power that lurked under all that softness. “And truly, I know that I handled it so very poorly and I understand why you–” The Prince’s breath hitched and tears clung to his lashes; that anger was still there but it was tinged with a sadness so visceral that it broke Blitzø’s heart. He wanted to kiss those tears away and silence him before all of this fell apart again.

“Stols, you don’t need to explain. I get it. I was a dick. You thought we were on a date and I used you and you got humiliated for it and I’m sorry.”

“No, darling. Well, I mean yes.” Stolas brushed away the tears and composed himself, still lying prone and half undressed beneath Blitzø and yet somehow looking so damn dignified. “Yes, I thought that we were on a date and yes it was rather crushing to learn that wasn’t what you had in mind, but I can hardly blame you for going along with my assumptions and leading me on given the circumstances...given your assumptions about the nature of my interest in you. I’m not upset that you wanted to take advantage of my title to get into that pretentious excuse for a dinner club, Blitzø. Frankly, it’s a testament to your pride that you don’t do it more often.”

“I don’t need your title, birdy. That isn’t what I-”

“I know, darling.” Stolas shushed him softly, cupping his scarred cheek with one hand. “There were a great number of assumptions and misunderstandings that night, but allow me to clarify one rather egregious one: Asmodeus doesn’t know the first fucking thing about me or my marriage or my feelings. You may have given me the courage to be myself, to begin to understand who I am again but you did not cause my divorce. Perhaps it would’ve taken longer for Stella and I to end things without the courage you’ve given me, but she tried to have me killed Blitzø and that isn’t even the worst of the indignities of our farce of a marriage.”

Just thinking about everything Stella had done to Stolas –all of the abuses Stolas had hinted at but never put words to– filled Blitzø with the kind of rage that usually ended in bloodshed. He itched to wrap his hands around that stupid bitch’s neck and squeeze.

“If I seemed at all embarrassed by you that night, please know that couldn’t be farther from the truth. I was embarrassed to be seen like that by you, my love. I was so proud when you came to the defense of your employees—your friends and their marriage. Confused but so very proud to be with the kind of man who stands up for those he cares for, regardless of the fact that you are an imp and Asmodeus is a Sin who could’ve vaporized you with a breath. That didn’t matter to you one bit and you’ve no idea how inspiring that was,” Stolas sighed wistfully. “And how very attractive. And then there was the shock of finding out that, evidently, you were in a relationship with that buxom succubus and I already felt alarmingly inadequate-”

“Stols, come on-”

“Please, let me finish. I felt unworthy of your affections before Asmodeus turned his wrath on me and my marital difficulties. So I hid. Not from them, the demons around us, not from anyone but you. I didn’t want you to see me like that, a coward who didn’t even defend himself...didn’t defend you. And then I saw litt-ahem-Millie do what I couldn’t, standing up for the man she loved. And-and I reached for you and it was simply too little too late.” Stolas tilted his head to the side and gave Blitzø a sad, soft smile. “If I could do it differently, I would. If I was the man I am now, the man you have helped me become, I would’ve given that Sin a piece of my mind and that bimbo ex-girlfriend of yours as well because you certainly have never failed to reciprocate my oral attentions...” A slight smirk pulled at his beak and Blitzø chuffed softly.

“Yeah, well I fucked her over pretty good so she’s entitled to a few low blows,” Blitzø admitted sheepishly, his cheeks darkening.

“So do you understand now? That however it may seem, you are not the cause of my divorce? That is Stella’s fault and hers alone. Well, that and the fact that I could never be attracted to her...which I suppose isn’t her fault, but given that she’s a miserable cunt my sexuality seems rather irrelevant.” Blitzø barked out a little laugh and dragged his arm across his own wet eyes. “But...” Stolas brought Blitzø’s face closer to his own, “she is Octavia’s mother and I cannot be the one to ruin that relationship. If I do then all of those years of suffering are for nothing,” he said emphatically, his thumb caressing Blitzø’s cheek below his eye. “So yes, Via might have her own mistaken ideas of why her parents are no longer married and about why her father is in love with someone else. And I will always be there for her, I will always endeavor to be the best father that I can be, and she will always be the most important thing in my life... but she is nearly eighteen years old. She cannot be my entire life. That isn’t fair to her, any more than it is to me. It is time for me to live my life for me. Surely Loona doesn’t approve of everything you do...”

“Uh, Loona doesn’t approve of anything I do,” Blitzø said. “But Loona and I aren’t you and Via, Stols. And I could deal with coming between you and your wife but not you and your daughter.”

“And you won’t. I cannot control Via’s reactions, but I can be understanding and compassionate and I can explain myself and love her regardless of how she feels about me and about this. And one day she will understand, and she will respect what I feel for you. And I have my suspicions that the two of you would get along quite well if given the chance, if that’s something you might consider at some point.”

“Well, that’s a boner-killer,” Blitzø joked out of the side of his mouth, as if he hadn’t gone soft the moment he’d broached the subject of Stolas’ daughter.

Stolas hooted softly. “I love you, Blitzø. Let’s not put any more pressure on tonight. I’m just so very, very happy to have you here with me.”

“I told you...” Blitzø’s tail curled in the air behind him and a shadow passed behind his eyes that ruffled Stolas’ feathers as a shudder raced down his spine. “Call me Blitzy.”

Blitzø’s kiss was nothing short of consuming and Stolas endeavored to give as well as he got, arching up from the marble floor to lean into their embrace while helping Blitzø rid him of his tunic and shirt. He usually wore his robe for their planned encounters, partly in an attempt to be alluring but also to spare the imp from the tedium of removing the layers and layers of garb he favored. As Blitzø leaned up and dragged each glove down his arm –pressing kisses and delivering small, sharp nips on his wrists as he pulled them free– he realized just how foolish that had been. Watching Blitzø patiently disrobe him while working them both back up to their previous state of arousal was one of the most singularly erotic experiences of his life, even considering the journey of sexual discovery he’d embarked on this past year. By the time Blitzø had his breeches around his ankles Stolas was absolutely trembling with need.

For all of his slow thoughtfulness in disrobing Stolas, Blitzø was quick to simply tug at his own clothes hastily as soon as he had the Prince naked. That is, until Stolas’ hands stilled his and gently brushed them away. He had sat up fully and was once again significantly taller than the imp who was perched on his knees between Stolas’ thighs. “Allow me. Please, Blitzy.” He’d never actually done this part himself during their full moon encounters; Blitzø always insisted on keeping full control. Hell, Stolas was usually bound and trussed up by the time Blitzø removed a stitch of clothing.

Blitzø’s eyes widened but he nodded and let his hands fall to Stolas’ forearms as the owl began to slowly unbutton his shirt the rest of the way. Stolas bent down to press his forehead to Blitzø’s between his horns just over his brand as he pulled apart his shirt. His palms skimmed up Blitzø’s sides and the imp wasn’t certain what to do with himself other than groan; this was a side of Stolas he wasn’t remotely prepared for. With a few gentle touches he had stripped away far more than his shirt. Blitzø felt vulnerable. Exposed. He was about to end this little experiment and take hold of the reins again when Stolas lifted one of his hands and repeated his own motions from earlier, stripping off Blitzø’s glove and nipping at the white patches of scar tissue with the tip of his beak, licking sweet little kisses over his skin. And goddammit, Blitzø melted. Stolas set aside the glove with the crystal embedded in it with particular care but then returned his full attention to Blitzø.

“You are so beautiful, darling...” Stolas said reverently, trailing one finger down the dip in the center of Blitzø’s abdomen to his belt. Five minutes ago Blitzø might’ve had a snarky comeback but just then all he could do was watch as Stolas’s confident fingers unbuckled his belt and unzipped his trousers, his hand sliding beneath the waistband with his palm flat against Blitzø’s skin. He half expected a thirsty quip about the size of his dick but all he got was a throaty moan from the owl as Stolas’ fingers closed around him and that was so much more effective. And it was the last straw that cracked his patient resolve. He needed more and he needed it now. He needed Stolas.

Blitzø pounced on Stolas without warning, pulling a loud squawk from his beak as he hit the marble, his landing softened by their makeshift bed. “No Stols, that’s you. Goddamn, birdy you have no idea...” He kissed every inch of Stolas that he could reach as he kicked off the rest of his clothes. Man, those Danger Zone briefs seemed really tacky right now but he was certain that he and Stolas would have a good laugh about them later. That and the giant sack of bullshit he left upstairs. I wonder if Fizz and Oz take returns...

Blitzø wasted no time, burying his face between those long legs that haunted his fantasies. If only he could explain to Stolas how many times he’d tried not to think of the impossibly sexy bird while he was touching himself only to finally give in and imagine those legs wrapped around his waist as he sank deep into him. Pushed him over the edge every goddamn time.

“Oh, Blitzy!” Stolas’ back arched as Blitzø thrusted his tongue where he so desperately wanted to be. Stolas’ hands were so rarely unrestrained when he did this and there was a reason; when the Prince reached down and grasped both of his horns at the base Blitzø let out the most embarrassing sound he’d made in bed since the one time Stolas had friskily slid a finger into him during a blow job. Yeah, he still thought about that one a lot.

Blitzø withdrew and kissed the swollen rim of Stolas’ cloaca messily before he climbed back up the length of his body, dragging his forked tongue in a wet stripe from his hole all the way up to his throat. “Tell me you want me, birdy...” Blitzø panted against his feathers.

“I always want you, darling,” Stolas moaned, tilting his head back to allow Blitzø more access. “Right now I need you...”

Damn. Who knew the real Stolas was actually good at dirty talk? Blitzø bit down on the juncture between Stolas’ shoulder and neck and the owl screeched enthusiastically. “Oh, fuck... yes! Yes, darling...please...” Fuck, he did like it when Stolas begged and the damn bird knew it. Those long fingers encircled his horns and yanked his head back until his beak could capture Blitzø’s mouth in a fiery kiss and Blitzø rutted against his belly like a goddamn teenager. He’d thought all this time that he was the one playing Stolas’ body like an instrument but the Prince knew just how to crawl under his skin and stay there, didn’t he?

As soon as Stolas released him Blitzø scrabbled back down between his legs, kissing his knees as he grasped the back of Stolas’ thighs and pressed them to his chest. His legs were long enough that he could still wrap them around Blitzø as he lined himself up. He looked up at those ruby eyes and Stolas reached out to caress his cheek as Blitzø thrusted home.

 

Notes:

Yeah, there's gonna be a chapter 4. FML I need to learn how to self-edit.

My sincere apologies to the readers of my other fics who are used to me publishing so frequently. I promise they aren't abandoned. I'm just multitasking!

Chapter 4: One-Stop Apology Tour

Summary:

Blitzø and Stolas end the full moon on a high note... then Blitzø has to face the music at Verosika's annual Hallows Eve bash...

Notes:

Some sweet smut up-front and then I just couldn't resist the opportunity to keep going with Apology Tour. Honestly, I think that episode fucked me up even worse than Full Moon.

Happy endings all around because that's what I need right now. I hope you enjoy and it helps you as much as it helped me. Thank you to everyone for the feedback on this fic, you have no idea what it's meant to me. I love you all.

 

Their mingled groans echoed in the big, empty ballroom. Blitzø shuddered as he bottomed out, pressing his forehead to the inside of Stolas’ thigh as he tried to rein in his emotions enough to put on a decent performance, or at least to not bust in two seconds like a fuckin’ virgin. Blitzø’d had the same thought dozens of times as he sank into Stolas’ body; this time he didn’t bite the words back to save face. “Shit, Stols...how does it feel like the first time with you every goddamn time?!”

“Oh, Blitzy...” Stolas’ feathers puffed out adorably and his hands moved down to Blitzø’s narrow shoulders and clung to him like his life depended on it. His voice was tight and heavy with feeling and that did nothing to help Blitzø’s stamina. “I know precisely what you mean, darling...”

Blitzø lifted his head and withdrew slowly, gritting his fangs as he snapped his hips forward again. Fuuuck, too good! Blitzø may not have been quite so hung up on his egocentric bullshit just then but that didn’t stop his insecurities from rearing their ugly heads like a hydra, hissing that he was nothing if he couldn’t rock Stolas’ world. He squeezed his eyes shut and began fucking Stolas in earnest, setting a punishing rhythm that forced little hooting gasps from his beak with every thrust. He wrapped one clawed hand around Stolas’ waist, pinning him to the marble as he leaned in to change the angle of their hips. He was so desperate to hear that little screech that signaled Stolas coming undone beneath him; to make Stolas completely lose it and feel his body clamp down around Blitzø’s and-

“Blitzø.” Stolas panted his name, his fingers winding between his spikes and forcing his head up. His eyes opened reflexively and goddamn...the needy, vulnerable expression on Stolas’ face almost ended things right then and there. “Please, look at me.”

“I can’t,” Blitzø ground out, slowing his thrusts to buy himself time...only now he could feel every inch of that delicious drag of Stolas tight around him and— shit shit shit! Stolas’ little white pupils widened with hurt and Blitzø hastily shook his head, turning to kiss the owl’s wrist. “No-no-no,” he said rapidly, his thrusts stilling for a moment. “Fuck, birdy...it’s just that if you keep looking at me like that I’m gonna cum too fuckin’ fast.”

“Oh...” 

All of the worry drained from Stolas’ face and when Blitzø dared to look at him again he had that knowing, sultry little smirk that told Blitzø he was well and truly screwed. Smug, sexy son of a bitch... Stolas held Blitzø’s gaze as he leaned up on his elbows, his chest still heaving and his breaths quick. Christ on a fuckin’ cracker, Blitzø was done for.

“Fuck it.” He reached out and grasped the back of Stolas’ neck, pulling him roughly against him until he was kneeling in Blitzø’s lap. The quick rearranging of limbs let Blitzø’s impending orgasm recede just enough that when he thrusted up into Stolas again he didn’t explode on impact. Blitzø circled both arms around the Prince’s lean torso and pressed his face into that soft plumage, pistoning his hips upwards again and again. Stolas wrapped both hands around the curve of Blitzø’s horns for leverage and bounced with his thrusts and –fuck– Blitzø’s vision went white behind his closed eyes. “Stolas, I-” I’m sorry I can’t tell you what you need to hear. I’m sorry that I can’t say how much I need you, how much I care about you, how much I lo- “ah fuck, I’m cumming!”

“Blitzy, yes-yes- yes - yes !” Stolas punctuated his moans with that strigine screech and his pussy convulsed in waves around Blitzø, soaking his lap and filling the room with the wet smack of Blitzø driving into him well past the point of hypersensitivity just to feel those muscles milking him for every drop. It was filthy and sweet and perfect and for just a moment Blitzø let himself be; no bravado or sexy, snarky one-liners. No jumping up under the pretense of showering or whatever just to avoid intimacy. He simply held Stolas as they ceased their movements and came down from their respective highs, his face still buried in those soft, sweet-smelling feathers. Stolas turned his head, resting his cheek atop Blitzø’s horns and folding his arms around the imp to crush him even more tightly against his plumage, and let the tears of happiness roll down his cheeks silently as he basked in the new experience of Blitzø’s unfiltered affection.

“I can do better,” Blitzø said, his words slightly muffled by the feathers in his mouth.

“Darling, if you do any better than that I may black out,” Stolas sighed, delirious and so, so very happy.

“What? No you horny goddamn bird,” Blitzø laughed, pulling back so that he could look up at Stolas (though he had to tilt his head all the way back to do so). “I mean us. I can’t give you everything you asked for, y’know all that romantic shit and I’m definitely going to fuck this up but... I can do better. I want to do this. With you. Like... officially or whatever.”

Stolas’ eyes shone with more joyful tears but his beak twisted in a playful smile. “Officially, eh?”

“Yeah well you’re the important Royal fucker, birdy.” Blitzø returned his smile, reaching up to touch his tear-stained cheek. “I dunno if you have to like, release a press statement and shit. I can picture it: Prince Stolas Bangs Imp Boyfriend, Get Over It Losers.”

The word “boyfriend” was something Blitzø definitely needed to use with caution if it was always going to garner this kind of reaction from Stolas. The Prince hooted with delight and pushed Blitzø onto his back, still straddling him with the imp’s softened cock buried inside his walls. He bowed his back dramatically to bring their mouths together and his kiss was so enthusiastic it was downright feral. Stolas’ strong hands pinned Blitzø’s wrists next to his head and then threaded their fingers together as his beak moved to nip little bruises on Blitzø’s neck.

Alright. Round two it is...

 

---

 

“Thiiiiis...was a shitty idea.” Blitzø looked up at the two-story house in the quiet, human neighborhood with the cotton-candy pink lights and the pumpkins -why do humans carve faces into pumpkins on Hallows Eve, anyway?- and the pulsating music that all just screamed Verosika.

“It was your idea, darling,” Stolas said patiently, squeezing Blitzø’s hand.

“Yeah, and I have shitty ideas sometimes. I mean, y’know, rarely. Very rarely...” Blitzø huffed.

“And I do not think that confronting your ex and giving her some closure is a bad idea, to be clear.”

“That’s a nice way of saying: rubbing that whore’s nose in my happiness.”

“Darling, I don’t know how smug you can be when we’re at a party devoted to hating you...”

“That she throws every goddamn year just to piss me off.” Blitzø narrowed his eyes at the house, his tail thrashing behind him and his free hand balling into a fist.

“Blitzy, we talked about this. If you’re serious about moving past all of this then you can’t just tell me that. You have to face her and bury this nonsense between you two so that she can move on. You owe her that at least.”

“I don’t owe her shit,” Blitzø growled. “I’m doing this for you, birdy. I could give a shit what that gash thinks about me.”

Stolas clicked his tongue and rolled his eyes. “Fine. But we’re here, now. Just go in there, say what you came to say, and then we can leave. We can go to a summoning! They promised that they would have cake this year.”

He watched Blitzø war with himself and then take the first step towards the house. Perhaps before he mightn’t have recognized the fear in the imp’s eyes for what it was but it was so very clear to him now. It was like they truly had been speaking different languages all this time and suddenly Stolas had the vocabulary to understand all of the little twitches and expressions that Blitzø spoke with in lieu of actual words. They had stayed up all night together after that fateful fight, which certainly wasn't a first. Except that this time they didn't only pass the time in passionate lovemaking; they had talked. Really, truly talked and listened to one another and Stolas had begun to feel as though he was truly seeing Blitzø for the first time.

Stolas had let himself be more vulnerable than even he had expected, opening up about his lonely, isolated childhood and the indignities suffered at the hands of his family— which had then adorably segued into talking Blitzø out of a regal killing spree. He probably should've been concerned about the fact that the imp’s default response to just about everything that angered him seemed to be murder but truthfully he thought it was...sweet. Sweet that he wanted to protect Stolas, to avenge him. Perhaps it wasn't the most conventional love language but the more Stolas learned, the more he began to read between the lines and see the various ways Blitzø expressed his care. Perhaps even love. Millie, Moxxie, his dear Loona, his oldest friend Fizzarolli, and now Stolas...

Blitzø had been very tight-lipped about his own childhood and Stolas respected that; the trauma was quite literally written on his face and Stolas would not reopen those wounds just to sate his own curiosity. Blitzø would either tell him eventually or, well, he simply wouldn't. But Stolas hadn't been able to help himself from inquiring about the buxom succubus that publicly –and rather stylishly– dressed him down at Ozzie's that cursed night.

Which is what had led them here, to the Human World on Hallows Eve walking into a positively bustling house party that, evidently, was thrown in Blitzø's er...dishonor.

“Jesus tittyfucking Christ, that's a lot of people.” Blitzø’s yellow eyes widened comically before he composed himself, swiping a hand down his face and looking up at Stolas with a cringe. Mercifully, no one seemed to have noticed Blitzø yet. They were probably too distracted by the towering Goetias to notice the imp at his heels. For once that was working in Blitzø’s favor. “Maybe you should wait outside, birdy...”

“And miss this golden opportunity to interrogate your ex-lovers? Hardly.” Stolas smirked down at him. “Besides, darling...I don’t think that you’re in any position to let your pride deny my protection right now. Is that effigy of your corpse cake?”

“Come on, Stols. I can literally feel you judging me from all the way up there.”

“I am not!” Stolas protested, pressing one hand to his cravat. “I find this all rather illuminating.”

“Uh-huh. You can't tell me that you don't have thoughts about all of...” Blitzø watched two female imps he vaguely remembered pull apart a piñata that looked remarkably like him but was also somehow offensive as fuck, “this.”

“Oh, I have many thoughts. Like that I was probably a fool not to make you wear a condom that first night,” Stolas teased.

“Ha-fuckin-ha,” Blitzø deadpanned, his cheeks darkening. “Look, there she is. Let's get this over with so we can go somewhere not full of jealous losers that want me dead...”

“Oh, yes they must be such morons for caring about you...” Stolas rolled his eyes.

“Caring? You have four eyes and still can’t see shit, apparently.” Blitzø gestured at the graffiti that read “Blitzo more like Shitzo” with an indignant expression.

“You don’t throw an entire event focused around one person that doesn’t matter to you, darling. Do you have any idea how much you have to care to do something this fucking stupid and petty?” Stolas looked down at him, his ruby eyes narrowing slightly and slicing right through Blitzø’s bravado. Ugh, that was going to take some getting used to.

“Yeah, yeah it’s a monument to my fuck ups. I’m the bad guy, I get it.”

“That’s not what I see.”

“It isn’t?” Blitzø’s eyes widened a little as he gazed back up at Stolas.

“No. If anything I see a room full of evidence of your self-destructive behavior and it absolutely breaks my heart, darling.” Stolas touched his scarred cheek with just the very tips of his fingers and Blitzø felt himself melt. Yeaaaaah, can’t get sappy here. These fuckers will smell blood in the water and frenzy. Thank fuck everyone’s already so shit-faced.

“Fiiiine.” His cheeks flushed grey and he slowly pulled away from Stolas’ touch. “You stay here and I’ll just–ah fuck.”

“You got a lotta nerve being here, little man.” The mountainous hellhound folded his arms across his broad chest, fixing Blitzø with his one good eye. “Ballsy, I’ll give you that, but whatever you’ve got planned ain’t gonna happen.”

“Oh fuck off, Vortex,” Blitzø hissed. “I just need to talk to her.”

“Yeah, I’m gonna go out on a limb here and say you’re the last one she wants to see...” Tex looked to where Verosika was manically stabbing at the crotch of the Blitzo cake with glee and Blitzø followed his sight-line with a wince.

“I rather think that baiting his tremendous ego with an entire party dedicated to him that she ensured he knew about conveys that Blitzø is exactly who she wants to see,” Stolas interjected coolly with the kind of casual authority that usually annoyed the absolute fuck out of Blitzø— except when it was used to his advantage.

“Yeah, I–wait, tremendous ego?” Blitzø looked up at Stolas with narrowed eyes and the owl just tilted his head with a sweet, indulgent smile. “Aaanyway, I’m not leaving until you let me by so we can do this the easy way or–” Tex cracked his knuckles and curled his lip in a snarl, “or you can never see my daughter again. How about that, huh?” Blitzø bared his own fangs in a smug grin.

“Nice try but we both know Loona doesn’t listen to a damn thing you have to say.”

“True, which is why I will approve of you so fucking hard that she’ll never want to see your big, hairy ass again.” Blitzø pointed one claw up at him, his grin spreading wider.

“Damn. That’s cold.” Tex seemed to consider his threat for a moment. “Fine, but if she stabs you it ain’t my fault and I’m not cleaning it up.”

“Ha. Knew it.” Blitzø straightened his lapels and strolled past Vortex with his chin in the air. Stolas trailed at his heels while Blitzø wove his way through the crowd, muttering half-hearted apologies to the demons he recognized as he passed them. “Sorry for the comment I made at your sister's wedding, though she did deserve it, she's a whore. Sorry for fucking your mom, though I thought it was your dad.”

They spied Verosika taking her slice of cake up to the second floor landing. Stolas’ long fingers curled over Blitzø’s shoulder and the imp looked up at him apprehensively. “Go on, darling. I’ll be right here.”

“Just don’t...talk to anybody. Or believe anything they say about me because they’re all full of shit.” Stolas hooted a little laugh and Blitzø looked up at the stairs, squaring his shoulders and marching up to meet his fate.

He leaned against the railing casually, not all that surprised when Verosika just puffed on her cigarette and otherwise didn’t react to his presence. “Hey, Ver.”

“You got a lotta balls coming here, Blitzo,” Verosika said through her teeth before exhaling a cloud of smoke.

“Yeah, I know. Everyone here hates me and my huge, brass balls.”

“Yep. That's the point, dumbass.” She waited for Blitzø’s snarky comeback that never came. “So what are you doing here? Never took you for a masochist.”

“Would you believe me if I said that I came to apologize?”

“No.”

“Good instinct. Honestly? I was curious about this whole stupid thing and I wanted to show off my boyfriend,” Blitzø admitted.

Verosika’s eyes widened, her lashes fluttering in surprise. “And you brought him here? Fuck, you’re even dumber than I thought.”

“Yeah...” Blitzø rubbed the back of his neck with one hand. “Probably not my best idea. But he’s all about this healthy communication bullshit so I’m supposed to come up here and tell you that I’m soooo sowwy for always telling it like it is, sister.” Blitzø grinned savagely.

“Oh, fuck you, you little prick!” Verosika seemed almost relieved. There was the Blitzø she knew; the one that would ruin this thing with Stolas so badly that she’d have a new drinking buddy by the time he was done.

“Come on, I’m just being honest! I'm sorry for dumping ya! Sorry for not falling head over heels for you! Or that guy or, fucking Dennis or- or anyone at this stupid fucking party!” Blitzø yelled, gesturing down at the crowd of rowdy, drunken demons with Stolas towering in the middle of them. Some incubus that Blitzø had one forgettable night with had grasped Stolas’ hand and was twirling the nervously giggling owl around the dance floor. Blitzø’s expression softened and he folded his arms on the railing, dropping his chin to rest on them. “I don’t know why it wasn’t you, Ver. But I can’t change the way I feel.”

“How do you think I felt? When the fun guy I was dating decided to just bail on me because I made the shitty mistake of saying I love... Ugh! It was the most embarrassing feeling. To be vulnerable for once and... you really just know how to send a message in the shittiest, fucking way.”

“I know.” Blitzø sighed. “Look, it wasn’t a mistake to say it. It was a mistake to feel that way about me. I don’t know if it was just the time or the place or it’s just because, well, you aren’t him...” Verosika followed Blitzø’s tender gaze down to the Prince who was now consoling one of the weeping guests, rubbing gentle circles on the imp’s back as he cooed softly. “But I thought you should know that, well, he said it and I...didn’t run. Not this time.”

“So what, you’re here to rub that in my face? That you finally grew a fucking heart? Bitch, please,” Verosika scoffed, though her tone had softened considerably.

“No. I...fuck, okay.” Blitzø rubbed his face with both hands and dropped down to sit with his legs dangling between the railing. “I know I don’t have any right to ask you this, but I really, really don’t want to fuck this one up. You were the closest I ever came to actually giving a shit before him so that’s why I’m here. I actually am, y’know... sorry. What I did, it was fucked up. I was scared and it’s a lot easier to disappoint people up-front than to actually try and disappoint them anyway. I-I don't want to be this way. Not forever.”

Verosika looked like she’d just been slapped. She stared down at him for a long moment, blinking with her mouth slightly agape. Finally, the succubus flicked away her cigarette and kicked out one of the railing posts before joining Blitzø on the floor with her long legs hanging over the party. “You know he’s like waaay too good for you, right?”

“Pfft, yeah no shit.” Blitzø leaned his head to the side against one of the posts. “I don’t get it. He’s a fuckin’ Prince, and he’s so...ugh, Ver. He’s great. And he’s been through so much bullshit and he really deserves something I-I don’t know if I can give him. He’s such a romantic. Like really, it’s gross, Ver. You would gag if you heard half of the sweet shit that comes out of that beak...when he isn’t saying filthy shit, that is.”

Verosika couldn’t help but laugh. “W-ow. It finally fucking happened.”

“Huh?”

“Blitzo Buckzo finally met his match.” Her grin was just a tad malicious.

“Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, slut.”

“So, you love this guy?”

“Woah, let’s not get carried away!” Blitzø held up both hands, his cheeks darkening immediately. “I-I didn’t say that. But...I do like him.” He looked back down at Stolas, struck by his beauty and his poise and the way he laughed behind one hand. Blitzø sighed heavily. “I really fuckin’ like him. And I don’t want him to ever feel, well,” he looked at the stairwell where a female imp was chugging from a bottle and weeping, “like that.”

“You want my advice?”

“Why the fuck else do you think I’d be pouring my guts out to my vindictive cock-bag of an ex?” Blitzø somehow made the insults sound almost like endearments and Verosika laughed.

“Be honest with him, fuckwad. And then keep being honest with him. When you’re scared, tell him. When he pisses you off, tell him. And especially when he makes you go all goo-goo eyed and shit like you are right now, fucking tell him,” Verosika said emphatically. “You don’t have to use the same bullshit words everyone else uses. Just tell him he’s important, that he matters, that he’s your...somebody.” Her smile was soft and sad and Blitzø felt genuine remorse for everything that had happened between them. “You keep telling him that shit every day and then maybe you might be worth how much he obviously cares about you.”

Silence fell between them and, for once, it was comfortable. Then Stolas looked up at him and Blitzø knew that the moment was over. “Thanks, Ver.” He looked over at his ex and they shared a small smile. “Er...can I ask you for one more thing?”

“Really pushing your luck, aren’t you?”

“Probably but, uh...” he patted his pockets frantically and finally found a rumpled up McMammon’s napkin and a marker. “My daughter is kind of a big fan. I mean, no accounting for taste and I’m not really sure how I feel about her listening to all of your thirsty bangers about me but...”

Verosika laughed and took the napkin, scribbling on it and handing it back to Blitzø. “You wish they were all about you.”

“Uh-huh. Keep tellin’ yourself that I wasn’t the best dick you ever had, sister.” He looked down at the napkin, reading Verosika’s loopy handwriting. Loona, Sucks about your dad. Stay hot, Verosika Mayday. “Classy.” 

“Fuck off before I string you up in place of the piñata, bitch.” Blitzø stood up and Verosika did the same. After an awkward moment, Blitzø rocked up onto the tips of his hooves and held out his hand. Verosika looked at him skeptically for a moment before taking it and shaking weakly.

“Later, skank.” Blitzø said before darting off back down the stairs before things could get any more surreal. He tucked the napkin safely back into his jacket and weaved through the crowd until he found Stolas by the punch bowl, knocking back a cup of something pink and noxious smelling. “Sooo...now that you’ve seen all my dirty laundry partying together, you wanna call this relationship thing quits or what?” Nice, Blitzø. Real nice. Fuck my fucking life and double fuck my stupid mouth.

Stolas laughed softly and held out his hand, wrapping his fingers around Blitzø’s. Relief flooded the imp’s bloodstream, more potent than any drug. He didn’t know what he’d ever done to earn Stolas’ seemingly infinite patience but he was so, so fucking grateful. “Not just yet, no. I did promise you cake, after all.”

Blitzø blushed and brought Stolas’ hand to his lips, producing the same flush on the owl’s heart-shaped face. “Then let’s get the fuck out of here.”

Verosika lit another cigarette as she watched Blitzø and Stolas leave hand in hand, the imp talking animatedly with his tail flicking happily and the Prince laughing. Something in her chest unclenched at the sight and she took another slow drag, thinking that maybe next year she needed to come up with a different theme for her Hallows Eve party.