Chapter Text
I knew this room with its bland walls, utilitarian chairs, and stark metal table. And just as the last time I was in a room very much like this one, I knew I was in big trouble. This time, though, I was truly alone. There was no snarky voice to keep me from having a panic attack and trying the door, which I knew would be locked.
I drummed my nails on the table top, feeling my patience start to wane. ‘How long am I going to have to wait?’ I wondered. I wasn't quite sure how I had gotten into this mess, but I knew that I was going to have a hard time getting out of it.
I jumped in my seat when the door handle moved and the door opened. I sat up straighter in my seat, and my mouth went dry as a desert as a man walked confidently into the small interrogation room. It was Smith, but he wasn't as I remembered him. He wore the suit and tie of an Agent with the rectangle sunglasses and earpiece to match. My heart ached to see him. I had to fight the impulse to leap to my feet and hug him and tell him how much I had missed him, how much I still loved him. I knew that action would not be welcome from this man who wore the face of my lover.
Smith remained silent as he placed the slim folder he had been carrying on the table before he pulled the chair opposite me out from under the table and sat down in it in one fluid movement. I wanted to speak, but found my words had died on my tongue, so instead I sat quietly and watched the Agent open the folder and, to my surprise, saw that it was empty. Finally, he spoke with a cool indifference.
“As you can see, we don’t know who you are. We have no record of your existence.” Smith looked up from the blank folder, and I could just about make out his eyes, even with his shades on. I remembered his eyes were blue, and I was desperate to snatch his glasses off his face to really see them. “You will tell us who you are, Miss Nobody,” he stated.
Miss Nobody? That wasn’t my name! But I was having difficulty recalling what my name was, yet I knew who Smith was. Why was that? I didn't understand why I had such a huge gap in my memory. I frowned as Smith continued speaking.
“You behave like a human, yet you are not. Your code is that of a program, an exile, but your actions indicate otherwise. You have been observed with known human terrorists who desire to cause destruction to the Matrix. So I will ask you again; Who are you?”
Fuck, I really was screwed. Who was I? My mind was blank. “I don't know.” I said, meekly.
Smith sat back in his chair as he regarded me. “You don't know who you are?” He grimaced, “I find that hard to believe, Miss Nobody.”
“Don't call me that.” I muttered.
“Then tell me who you are and why you are assisting the resistance.”
“Assisting the resistance? What resistance? Isn't there a truce in place? The Machines and Humans are not at war.” I argued, trying not to show my irritation.
“Not for much longer.” Smith’s tone was low, threatening, and it sent shivers down my spine.
“What do you mean by that? Is the truce coming to an end?” I asked with trepidation, but he disregarded my question.
“Who are you?” he repeated.
The fog refused to lift from my mind. My name continued to elude me, yet I could remember him. Of us, together, before he became the Agent program seated opposite me. I was as much of a stranger to myself as I was to Smith. I blinked and looked down at my hands, no longer able to look at him.
“I don’t know who I am. I haven’t known for some time. I feel as though I have gone through so many changes. The person I used to be is not me anymore. Too much has changed. I’ve changed to the point that I no longer recognize myself.” I looked back up at Smith, and as I did, I felt overwhelming grief cling to my soul. “And the worst thing about it all is that you don't recognize me, either.” I added, solemnly.
Smith frowned. “I'll tell you who you are, you are a human abomination, an enigma, a pointless anomaly who should have been deleted by the Architect instead of being allowed to continue to live. Your mere existence is a drain on our resources which are becoming increasingly scarce with each human that is ‘freed’ because of this truce. A truce that serves no purpose other than to make the humans think that they have some control. So you see, you are nothing, Miss Nobody." He drawled as if I bored him.
I could feel anger welling up inside me. I hated hearing Smith talk this way, this wasn't who he was.
“You're wrong.” I said thickly, “the truce does serve a purpose. It stopped the war and saved countless deaths of both humans and machines. The humans only free those minds that don't want to be in the Matrix, that don't want to serve as the machine's energy source.”
"You mean, our energy source,” his hand indicates between the two of us. “Without the humans powering this system, what would become of you, Miss Nobody?"
Gods, I wish he would stop calling me that, and yet I still couldn't tell Smith what my name was. I felt my shoulders sag as the fog
in my mind continued to persist and the reality of Smith's words sank in. I’d had my freedom stripped from me without my consent. I could only exist in the Matrix now, a reality that I had believed I had come to accept even though the truth about the Matrix was still a horrific nightmare.
“We have a proposal for you, Miss Nobody,” continued Smith, unaffected by my silence to his question. I looked at him questioningly.
“What kind of proposal?”
Smith smirked, albeit briefly. “For you to continue your life living in the Matrix, we require you to give us something in return.”
I did not like where he was going with this, I scratched the back of my neck, nervously.
“Given your successful establishment of trust with the human resistance over the past few months, we require your assistance in providing valuable intelligence.”
I tried not to stare at Smith with my mouth open. “You want me to be a spy?”
He inclined his head. "The information we require from you pertains to the recent surge in human resistance activity, which has raised concerns and requires our attention.”
I tried not to laugh. The Architect was worried, good, he should be. “Hmm… Yeah, I don't think so. If the humans found out I was working for you; for the Machines, they wouldn't hesitate to kill me.”
“Miss Nobody, I don't think-”
“Stop calling me that! I am somebody! Somebody you used to care about and I am somebody who is going to free you.”
Smith's hand went up to the earpiece in his ear. “Oh Miss Nobody,” his hand lowered. “You disappoint me.”
“You know who I am! You know my name!” I was starting to feel desperation creep in.
Smith rose from the chair, his movement fluid and precise. “How can I know you, when you don't even know yourself.”
I felt wetness run down my cheek. Was I crying? I looked up at him, but there was no compassion, no sympathy, only cold indifference.
“You have no purpose,” Smith said, raising the gun he had removed from his holster and aimed it straight at my head. “Goodbye, Miss Nobody..”
“No!”
The shrill sound of my cellphone on my nightstand had me bolting upright in bed. Sweat coated my skin, and my heart raced in my simulated chest. It was all a dream. With shaky hands, I fumbled for the ringing phone. The screen showed that it was the Oracle calling me.
“H-hello?” I answered. I couldn't hide the shakiness of my voice.
“Oh! I'm sorry, did I wake you, Tegan?”
Tegan! My name is Tegan. I am a priestess of the Oracle. I was once a human, plugged into the Matrix, and I worked as a spiritual medium. About a year ago, I discovered that Smith shared my code with his own after he had cloned me when he was a virus, and he told me the truth about the Matrix. I then went on a wild journey involving exiles, and I was turned into a program. The connection to my real body was severed by an exiled program who calls himself The Merovingian. I share an unexplainable connection with Smith. He sacrificed his freedom and became an Agent in order to save my life and I am going to rescue him.
I remembered it all.
“Yeah, I had a really intense dream…. Is everything alright?” I asked as I rubbed my eyes and face.
“Niobe called. She said everything is in place for the extraction tonight, if you still wanted to go ahead?”
The extraction. It settled within me like a heavy stone in my stomach.
“Tegan? Did you hear me?” The Oracle asked when I didn't reply.
“Yeah, yeah I'm ready.” I confirmed.
“Okay, I’ll contact her soon. Take some time for yourself, Tegan, and I'll see you later this morning for Byte's lesson.”
I ended the call and sat in silence for a moment. The dream I’d had was going around and around in my head. It had shaken me, not because of what had happened in it, but because it wasn’t the first time I’d had it, and a part of me sensed that it might not be the last time either.