who are we to fight the alchemy?

by lilyswriting

Summary:

"hello sara, this is tadej! just wanted to check if tomorrow’s meeting is still at 2pm. oh and also the place, haha. thank you!"

"Hello. This is not Sara. I’m sorry, you probably got the wrong number. Have a good day."

 

This could have ended there.

It didn't.

Notes:

*insert the ah shit here we go again meme"

Omg what am I doing with my life???
Anyway, here is another little thing I've wanted to try for a long time. I'm a sucker for these kinds of "wrong number" fics and I had to give it a try.
I still don't know how many parts there will be, we'll see how it goes.

Enjoyyyyy

Chapter 1: to meet

27th of June, 2024 

10:01 am 

 

 

(+386 549 801 27)

hello sara, this is tadej! just wanted to check if tomorrow’s meeting is still at 2pm. oh and also the place, haha. thank you! 

 

Hello. This is not Sara. I’m sorry, you probably got the wrong number. Have a good day. 

 

oh shit 

that sucks 

sorry for bothering you! 

 

It’s okay. I hope you’ll find Sara’s number. 

 

wait, this is a danish number, right? 

that means you’re danish? 

 

Yes ? 

 

do u know a sara anselm? 

 

Hm, no ? 

Just because I’m Danish doesn’t mean I know every Danish people, you know. 

 

yeah you’re right, sorry 

i’m just a bit desperate 

i just started this new job and i'm already fucking it up 

i don’t know why I'm rambling to u i'm sorry 

 

I’m sure there’s another person you could contact? Another colleague?  

 

not really, i haven’t met a lot of people yet 

it’s kind of a freelance thing 

it’s fine, i'll find something 

thanks though, and sorry again 

 

No, it’s okay. I hope everything will work out for you. 

 

thanks! :)

 

 

28th of June, 2024 

03:14 pm 

 

(+386 549 801 27)

i made it!  

to the meeting, i mean 

i also found sara’s number 

just wanted to update you i guess haha 

 

I’m glad to hear it!  

I thought about asking you about it. I was getting invested.

 

the meeting went really well, i met a bunch of really cool people 

can't wait to actually get started 

 

What do you do, exactly?  

 

i’m a photographer! 

i'm going to follow the Tour de France for a slovenian media 

i’ve dreamed about this for so long, can’t believe i'm here 

 

Oh, wow. That’s a really cool job. 

So you like cycling? 

 

i love it!!

i almost became a pro a few years ago but had a nasty crash so 

anyway, i'm just so excited for this tour 

 

Oh, I’m so sorry about your crash... I hope you recovered well. 

Yeah, I’m excited too. 

 

don’t be, it’s okay! 

ooooh, you’re into cycling too??? 

 

I guess you could say that 

I’m sorry but I have to go. Enjoy the Tour. 

 

wait, can i have your name? 

i’m sorry if u think it’s weird but 

yeah i have no logical reason to ask this, sorry 

 

It’s Jonas. 

jonas, okay 

bye jonas 

 

Bye Tadej. 

 

 

29th of July, 2024 

08:26 pm 

 

Tadej

what a first stage, right? 

so happy to see bardet in yellow 

 

Yeah, he really deserves it. 

 

i mean, they all do probably, but it’s his last one so 

plenty of time for vingegaard to take it back, though 

 

You sound really sure about this. 

 

well, it’s vingegaard, right? 

 

But he crashed in April. Nobody is betting on him. 

 

people are just dumb 

the guy is a double winner 

i mean, the crash looked bad, obviously 

but he’s a fighter, that one 

he’ll show everyone during the mountain stages 

 

You think so?  

What about Evenepoel? Roglič? 

 

sure, they’re great 

i mean, roglič is our national hero 

but vingegaard is just the best 

 

I guess we’ll have to wait and see 

I’m going to bed. Goodnight, Tadej. 

 

you're such a grandpa lol 

gn jonas!! 

 

 

30th of June, 2024 

08:30 pm 

 

 

The French are definitely here this year. 

 

omg right?? 

didn’t see that one coming 

 

And Roglič in yellow, too. 

 

yeah but it’s only the second stage 

it doesn’t matter yet 

 

Did you take any good pictures? 

 

my sd cards are already full lol

there are just so many moments to capture you know 

*Image attachment: Wout Van Aaert, Enric Mas and Juan Ayuso riding and flower fields on the foreground* 

*Image attachment: Primoz Roglic wearing the yellow jersey on the podium* 

*Image attachment: Kevin Vauquelin crossing the finish line* 

 

Wow, this is beautiful. 

You’re really talented. 

 

ty!! 

here is my insta if you want to see more : @tadejpogacar_ 

 

I’ll check it out, thanks. 

Have a good evening. 

 

u too jonas!! 🤗

 

 

08:30 pm

 

 

Woutje

Who are you texting? 

 

You’re sitting in front of me, Wout 

Why are you texting me? 

 

Didn’t want to embarrass you  

You’re smiling at your phone 

Why are you smiling? 

 

Am I not allowed to smile now? 

 

You’re suspicious 

You’re suspicious

 

🙄🙄 

 

 

1st of July, 2024 

08:19 pm 

 

 

Tadej

BINIAM GIRMAY 

WHAT A SPRINT 

🔥🔥🔥

Yeah, that was a good fight. 

The rest of the stage was quite boring, though. 

 

oh yeah, tell me about it 

but that final sprint man 

that's what i love about flat stages 

everything is so calm for like 4 hours 

then bam 

all the action in the final kilometers  

 

You sound really passionate. 

 

oh yeah, sorry 

my friends always say i'm way too dramatic and emotional haha 

just like a child 

 

No, don’t apologize. I didn’t mean it as a bad thing. I think the world would actually be a better place if adults behaved a bit more like children, sometimes. 

 

that’s a nice way of seeing things 

you’re a wise man jonas 

are u actually a grandpa?? 

you sound like one 

 

Lol, no. I’m 27 so, not that old. 

 

well, that’s reassuring! 

not that I have anything against old people you know but 

i’m 25, not that old too 

i should get back to editing, i have to clear my sd cards for tomorrow’s stage 

can't wait 🤗

 

Yeah, it’s gonna be a good one. 

Have a good evening, Tadej.  

 

u too jonas the wise man! 

 

2nd of July, 2024 

8:06 pm 

 

 

Tadej

*Image attachment: Primož Roglič and Jonas Vingegaard descending the mountains* 

*Image attachment: People cheering on the sides of the road as Remco Evenepoel ascends a climb* 

i love mountain stages 

and a slovenian win so couln’t be more happy! 

what did u think of the stage? 

 

8:40 pm 

 

are you already sleeping, old man? 

 

9:06 pm 

 

 

Woutje

Jonas 

Do you want to talk about it? 

 

Talk about what? 

 

Stop that 

I saw you at dinner 

It’s only the fourth stage  

 

I don’t know if I’ll be able to finish it 

I think it was a mistake 

I shouldn’t be here 

 

Jonas, listen to me 

Look at where you were 3 years ago and look at you now 

Two-times Tour winner 

Best climber in the world 

You almost died three months ago and you fought like a lion

You are exactly where you should be 

Now, you’re going to rest and have a good night sleep 

No matter what happens, I’m always by your side, okay? 

 

Yeah, okay 

Sorry 

Thank you, Wout 

 

Always, little one 

 

09:15pm 

 

 

Hey, sorry for not answering, it was a busy day. 

Mountain stages are my favorites, too 

Nice pictures, by the way. 

Tadej

hi, no worries 

i actually never asked what you do for a living? 

 

Oh 

I sell bikes 

 

omg really? 

that’s so cool!!! 

in denmark? 

 

Yes, in Denmark. 

 

your business must have been doing really good after vingegaard’s first win lol 

 

Yeah haha 

I’m sorry but I’m really exhausted from the day, I should go to sleep 

 

don’t apologize, it’s fine! 

have a good night, jonas the bike seller! 

 

Good night, Tadej the photographer. 

 

 

3rd of July, 2024 

10:15am 

 

 

Tadej

*Image attachment: mountains in the background, a hand holding a coffee cup in the foreground* 

hi, i'm in Saint-Jean-de-Maurienne today (wtf is this name??) 

 

Nice view! 

Have fun today. 

 

you too!! 

well, as much as possible selling bikes i guess

 

05:47pm 

 

Tadej

CAVENDISH 

wtf man 

i have to be honest here i cried 

 

07:30pm 

 

I think you’re not the only one, lol 

What a legend 

 

i never heard so much screaming at the finish line 

his family was so happy, too 

i'm too soft for this 

 

Yeah, I mean this job is all about sacrifices, especially for the families 

It must feel good to know it was worth it 

 

he’s such a nice guy too 

everyone loves him 

same thing with van aert, can’t find a single person who doesn’t like him 

 

Wout is the best 

 

ooooh, big fan? 

celebrity crush, maybe? 😏😏

 

Lol, no, not like that 

I just admire him a lot 

 

yeah, i get it!

 

Same with you and Roglič, no? 

well yeah, slovenia is crazy about him 

and he’s one of the best 

but I have a soft spot for vingegaard 

it’s just mesmerizing to see him ride 

he’s so small and so strong at the same time like  

nobody had seen him coming and now he's on his way to become a legend too

 

Really? 

People tend to think he’s cold and too caught up in strategies. 

 

they talk about him as if they knew him personally 

i think he’s just a reserved guy, humble 

i bet he’s the nicest dude  

i would sell my entire camera collection to be able to talk to him 

 

Wow, that’s a lot 

I don’t think you’ll have to do that. You work in the field. Maybe you could ask to meet him? 

 

idk, it’s kind of hard to approach him 

not his fault of course, but the media are always after him 

and he’s in the middle of the tour, i don’t want to bother him 

maybe at the end, though 

 

Yeah, maybe 

Chapter 2: to share

Notes:

YOU GUYS, I read all of your comments and omg, I wasn't expecting that ! Thank you so much for your nice words.

I'm having so much fun writing it, I can't wait to show you what's in store haha.

Also, just wanted to clarify something : in here, Primož is kind of "replacing" Tadej, if that makes sense. He won the Tour in 2020 and 2021. I feel like I'm trying to manifest here so that good things can *finally* happen to him.

Anyway, enjoy this one! <3

TW : mention of crash, injuries

4th of july   

08:07 pm  

 

 

Tadej

abrahamsen is a fucking showman lol  

i feel like he’s going to be in every single breakaway  

wait, you have the same name as him!  

 

Well, Jonas is quite a common name. 

 

yeah kinda  

lots of jonas in cycling  

 

Hm, maybe we should do a study about it.  

 

that would be an interesting topic!  

did u go to uni?  

 

Oh no!

I worked immediately after high school.

 

yeah me too  

i wasn't great at school  

i always got suspended  

 

I don’t know why but I’m not really surprised.  

 

hey!!  

didn't know you could be sassy like that  

 

I’m a man full of surprises.

 

i bet you are, jonas the bike seller 😏

how was ur day by the way?  

 

It was fine, not that busy.  

What about you? Did you enjoy today’s stage?  

 

i did actually  

lots of interesting things happened  

but I’m definitely looking forward to the ITT  

 

Ah yeah, not a fan of those.  

 

really???  

i mean, i guess it’s quite boring to watch in the beginning but man  

the end is going to be epic with the golden trio  

 

I always find it to be a bit stressful, though.  

 

oh yeah, totally  

i can’t imagine what’s in their heads when they’re on the ramp  

 

I mean, it must depend, but I assume there’s not a lot going on in their minds at this moment. They have to be entirely focused on what they’re doing.  

 

maybe that’s a good thing i didn’t make it as a pro then  

i’m shit at concentrating lol

 

What happened, by the way? With your crash?  

You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to.  

 

no, it’s okay  

i got hit by a car during training  

 

Oh my god  

Are you serious right now?

 

yeah, it wasn't the best day of my life lol  

i woke up a week later in the icu, i had so many fractures and internal bleeding, it was a mess  

doctors were not really optimistic, they had prepared my family  

but I'm really stubborn so  

i only lost one kidney on the way!  

 

I'm so sorry it happened to you, Tadej

This is so maddening   

There are so many accidents involving cars and cyclists, it infuriates me how people are so reckless when they drive.  

So many lives were lost because of this and it’s like people don’t learn from it.  

I’m really glad you made it out alive.  

 

yeah, me too  

 

Sorry, I get emotional about things like this.  

 

a wise man once told me i shouldn’t apologize for being emotional  

his name is jonas  

do u know him?  

 

Haha, very funny.  

 

i know  

people say it’s charming 😌

 

It is.  

 

okay, stop it, you’re making me blush  

igtg, i have some more work to do  

but we'll talk tomorrow?  

 

Yeah, of course.  

Have a good night.  

 

u too 🙂

 

Oh and Tadej?

 

yep?

 

Thank you, for telling me about your accident.

It must not be easy, talking about it.

 

it's not as bad as it used to be

and it's actually easy to talk to you about it, so

thank u for listening

 

Of course 🙂

 

 

5th of july 

07:23 pm  

 

 

Tadej

*Image attachment : Remco Evenepoel on his ITT bike, the background blurry from the speed*  

remco looked like a fucking rocket  

it was so insane  

 

 

08:46 pm  

 

 

He was impressive, yeah.  

Roglič too.  

 

can’t forget about vingegaard!  

 

He was 37 seconds behind.  

Not his best performance.  

 

are u kidding me??  

he's just coming back from an injury and he’s only 37 seconds behind the fucking world champion  

you sound like you don’t like vingegaard that much, huh?

 

No, no, he’s a good rider.

 

“good” ? god, you’re harsh!  

i'll make sure you love him by the end of the tour  

you'll be as equally obsessed as i am  

 

You're obsessed with Jonas Vingegaard?  

 

i thought i was being obvious lol  

maybe I'm biased because i have a tiny crush on him  

who can blame me though?? have u seen his eyes???  

 

 

08:50 pm  

 

 

Wout  

Wout, help  

A guy is flirting with me  

Well, not directly with me, but  

Oh my god, what do I do?  

 

Woutje

Woah, slow down  

Where the fuck are you??  

 

In my room, where do you think I am??  

 

You just told me someone was flirting with you!!  

 

Through texts, I mean  

 

Okay, who is it?  

 

That’s the thing  

I don’t know him  

Well, not really  

 

I’m fucking lost here  

 

Okay  

Promise me you won’t judge me or make fun of me, okay?  

 

Oh god  

What did you do??  

 

Promise me!  

 

Yeah yeah I promise  

Spill it  

 

Okay so  

This guy texted me like two days before the start of the Tour thinking I was one of his co-workers. Turns out he had the wrong number but we kept on texting each other and he’s actually a slovenian photographer following the Tour and he thinks I’m a Danish bike seller because I couldn't tell him the truth you know. Well I guess I could, but I didn’t, and now we text each other every night after each stage and we talk about other things and he’s actually very funny and endearing and he talks a lot and he just told me he had a crush on me. Well, not me, but Jonas Vingegaard. But I am Jonas Vingegaard. But he thinks I’m Jonas the Danish bike seller.  

Wout? You’re still here?  

 

Wait  

I’m trying to process everything  

 

You’ll process later, you’re supposed to tell me what to do!  

 

What did he say about his crush on you?  

 

*Screenshot*  

 

He literally admitted he was obsessed with you  

 

Yes  

 

And he has a thing for your eyes  

 

Yes  

 

Sounds a bit weird  

Maybe you should block him  

 

What? No!   

 

Why? You don’t even know the guy  

 

But I like talking to him  

 

Wait  

Is he the one you were texting a few nights ago?  

When you were smiling at your phone like an idiot?  

 

I was not smiling like an idiot, you dickhead  

 

But you were!!  

Oh my god you like him  

 

I don’t like him  

He’s just fun and easy to talk to  

It’s a nice distraction from the pressure  

 

Do you even know what he looks like?  

 

No, but that’s not the point  

 

What’s the point, then?  

 

I don’t know!  

That’s why I don’t do the whole human relationships thing. I’m not good with that.  

You’re right, it’s weird, I don’t even know him  

 

Hey  

For what it’s worth, I think you’ve been more relaxed these past few days  

Maybe it’s a good thing for you  

Also, you deserve the compliments and the praises  

 

Stop it  

 

I’m just saying  

You shouldn’t think too much about it  

Keep on texting him if you enjoy it  

As long as you are focused during the stages  

 

You know I am  

 

Just be careful with what you share with him, okay?  

 

Yeah, of course  

Thank you Wout  

I know I’ve been a mess since the crash  

 

You’re not a mess, Jonas  

You’re human  

We'll talk about it later, okay?

Now go to sleep, we still have two more days before the rest day  

 

Yeah okay  

Goodnight Woutje  

 

Goodnight little one  

 

 

6th of July, 2024 

8:36 pm

 

 

Hey  

Tadej

jonas!!  

did you fall asleep last night lol?  

 

Yeah I did, sorry  

 

it’s okay  

tell me about your day  

 

Well, not a lot to say haha. Just a regular Saturday, I guess.  

How was it for you? Another Girmay’s win, that’s impressive.  

 

it is!!  

philipsen found his new biggest opponent  

i must say I’m getting a bit tired of the flat stages  

 

I think tomorrow’s stage will be a bit more interesting  

 

oh my god, yesssss  

it's like a mini paris-roubaix lol  

14 sectors full of gravel  

it’s going to be a mess  

 

Yeah, I think we'll see some crashes for sure.  

 

it's gonna be so stressful for the leaders!!  

they can lose so much time here  

but the pictures are gonna be amazing  

 

I checked your Instagram account, by the way  

Your pictures are so different from what I usually see  

 

in a good way i hope haha  

 

Yeah, of course! I didn’t think it was possible to feel so many emotions watching cycling pictures.

 

it’s actually the nicest compliment i’ve ever received lol  

thank u jonas, i really appreciate it  

 

Only sharing the truth.

 

can i ask you a question?

 

You already did.

 

haha, you're hilarious 🙄

seriously

 

Go ahead.

 

why did you answer me after the first time?

i mean, you could have just ignored or blocked me

 

Why did you continue texting me?

 

you can't answer with a question!

that's not how it works

 

I thought you were funny. And interesting. And I selfishly needed some cheering up, I guess.

What about you?

 

oh wow, i wasn't expecting an honest answer

well, i thought you were nice, and you were really calm when i was panicking and idk, it felt reassuring 

and i like your sarcasm

why did you need the cheering up?

 

Something happened, a few months ago. I had a rough time. I'm better now but I guess I still get anxious about things and talking to you helps with that.

 

oh

i'm glad i can bring you a bit of comfort

if you ever want to talk about it, i'm a good listener

 

Thank you Tadej 🙂

 

u're welcome jonas

have a good night of sleep old man

 

Stop calling me that!

 

neverrrrrr

 

Lol, go to sleep you menace

 

yes sir 🫡

 

 

Chapter 3: to doubt

Notes:

Oh my god, I've never received that many comments it's insane ! Thank you so so much, I promise I read every single one of them and it makes me smile so much. I'm so happy you're enjoying this little silly thing haha

Thank you again for the love and support ! <3

(also : I love Remco with my whole heart, every little jab at him is just for the plot)

7th of July, 2024 

10:33 am 

 

 

Sara 

Hi Tadej, I hope everything is alright for you! Tim said you were having fun and from what I’ve seen on your social medias, you’re really killing it! 

Just wanted to let you know that because tomorrow is a rest day, there will be some press conferences with the teams. I booked you for the Visma one, I think there will be Jonas Vingegaard and Wout van Aert.  

Is that alright for you? 

 

Tadej 

hello Sara! i’m great thank you, i still feel like I’m in fever dream though haha 

oh my god are you kidding me? i would love to go! how does it work? 

 

Great, I knew you would be thrilled! 

Well the rest day will be in Orléans. The team has booked a conference room in the hotel they’re staying at, there will be journalists from different countries. Alek will ask some questions for the Slovenian media, I think you’ve met him before? 

 

yeah i did! 

 

Great, you’ll just have to take some pictures for the article, nothing special or anything but it’s still interesting I think 

I’ll send you the details about the hotel and the time 

 

okay, sounds great! 🤗

have a good day! 

 

You too Tadej! 

 

 

11:38 am 

 

Woutje

Are you okay little one? 

You look a bit pale 

Well, paler than usual 

 

I’m fine 

A bit nervous 

 

Yeah I know 

It’s gonna be okay though 

 

What if I fall? I’m really bad on gravel 

 

You won’t 

And the whole team is there for you, okay? We’ll make sure nothing happens to you 

 

I don’t want anything to happen to you either 

 

Jonas 

I’m a cyclocross world champion 

Riding on slippery surfaces is in my DNA 

 

I still can’t believe you actually enjoy riding in the sand 

What is wrong with you? 

 

I’m just a cool guy 😎

 

I don’t think cool guys say they are cool, you know 

 

Maybe 

But I distracted you, didn’t I? 

 

You did 

What would I do without you? 

 

You would still sell fish in a really cold country 

 

Oh fuck off

 

 

07:09 pm 

 

 

Tadej 

that was one of the coolest stages i've ever seen 

oh hi by the way 

i feel like I’m not polite enough 

 

 

08:37 pm

 

 

Hey 

It’s okay, you don’t need to say hi haha 

But yeah, what a crazy stage. Never seen anything like it, really. 

 

i know right? 

and the white roads are great for pictures, i’m editing some right now!

 

Can I see them? 

 

*Image attachment: a laptop screen showing a picture of Primož trying to breakaway being edited on Photoshop* 

that’s all I’m sharing for now, gotta keep some surprises 😏

 

Okay, fair enough 

So, is Vingegaard still your hero after today? 

 

of course he is, what do you mean? 

 

Well, he refused to collaborate with Primož and Remco. 

Didn’t you hear what Evenepoel said about him? 

 

what, the thing about having no balls? 

remco always says shit like this bc he’s young and can’t think before opening his mouth 

ofc vingegaard was not going to pull 

he's here to win the tour, and you can’t win like that, especially after coming back from serious injuries 

and yeah sometimes you have to be bold and attack and shit but as a leader you can’t just rely on that 

you have to think about the next stages and not waste time and energy on things like that 

 

Being spontaneous doesn’t seem to be a problem for Primož. He won the Tour twice. 

 

yeah, but every rider is different, that’s what makes the sport so interesting 

and primož makes more mistakes than vingegaard, in my humble opinion 

 

So you say Vingegaard is clever? 

 

that’s actually his main strenght, i think 

what do you think? 

 

I don’t know, to be honest 

I think people like to watch battles and they’re probably not very happy with Vingegaard, right now 

 

i think people are just dumb and don’t know anything about competing  

it’s always easier to criticize when you’re comfortably watching from your couch 

i say fuck them 

 

Yeah you’re probably right 

Fuck them 

 

oh wow, jonas  

did you just swear?? 

 

I think I did 

I told you I was full of surprises 

 

and you’re also a mysterious man 

i feel like I don’t know a lot about you 

 

I don’t know a lot about you, either 

 

oh come on, you basically know everything 🙄

 

What do you want to know? 

 

idk like 

do you have siblings? 

 

No, I'm an only child 

You? 

 

1 brother, 2 sisters 

 

That's a lot! 

 

yeah, it was real chaos when we were younger lol

but i can’t imagine a life without them 

did you ever feel lonely without any siblings? 

 

No, not really. I liked to be alone, actually. My mom was always trying to get me to play outside with other kids but I always felt a bit different. I didn’t like the same things.

 

and what did little jonas like? 

 

Reading, riding my bike on my own. I enjoyed the silence. I still do, actually. 

 

really? silence always makes me uncomfortable, i always feel the need to fill it with something 

 

It's okay, we all have different needs, I guess. 

 

hm 

it’s weird 

 

What? 

 

we’re very different from each other 

well, we both like cycling, but I feel like it’s the only thing we have in common 

but I really like talking to you 

like, it wouldn’t feel right if we just stopped texting each other 

 

Why would we stop? 

 

idk 

maybe you’re getting bored of me lol 

 

I don’t think I could every get bored of you Tadej 

 

oh 

okay 

that's  

that's great, actually 

anyway 

i should probably go and prepare for tomorrow 

i have a press conference to attend  

wow, it sounds so serious when you put it like that 

 

Really? That’s exciting! 

 

yeah, they always take place during the rest days 

oh and you’ll never guess who is getting interviewed 

 

I’m really bad at guessing 

Tell me 

 

vingegaard and van aert!! 

i'm not the one asking the questions obviously, just taking pictures  

but I'm gonna be in the same room as them! 

isn't that crazy?? 

 

Wow 

Yeah, it is 

 

 

09:23 pm 

 

 

Wout 

Wout we have a problem 

 

Woutje

And by “we”, you mean? 

 

Me 

I have a problem 

 

That’s what I thought 

Let me guess 

It has something to do with that Slovenian photographer 

 

How did you know?? 

 

Because that guy has turned you into a fucking 14-year-old with a crush 

 

What are you talking about? 

I don’t have crush 

I can’t have a crush on someone I’ve never seen 

 

We’ll come back to that later 

Now, what is the problem? 

 

He’ll be there tomorrow for the press conference  

Taking pictures, obviously 

 

And how is that a problem? It’s literally his job 

 

It’s a problem because we’ll be in the same room 

I’m panicking right now 

 

Mate, you need to calm down 

You’re not even going to be able to recognize him because you never saw his damn face 

 

But they wear those things around their necks, no? 

With their names on it and everything 

 

He’ll probably be far away, you won’t be able to tell 

Now, I think the real problem is that you want to know what he looks like 

 

What? No! 

I don’t care 

We just talk about cycling 

Why would I want to know what he looks like? 

It’s not like I’ve tried to imagine it before 

 

Jonas 

 

What would I do with that information? 

It’s just a face and a body 

Nothing important 

 

Jonas 

 

And what if I want to know? It’s just human curiosity! 

And he knows what I look like, it’s not fair 

Well, he doesn’t know Jonas the bike seller has the same face as Jonas the cyclist but 

 

Jonas 

 

Oh god, what did I do? Why did I answer to that fucking text? 

 

You’re giving me a headache man 

Now stop talking, will you? 

I’m going to give you three options, okay? 

First one: you stop talking to him and go on with your life. 

 

Absolutely not. 

 

Second one: you tell him who you really are and then based on his reaction, you either block him because he’s a fucking lunatic or he's actually a decent human being and you start dating each other and you live happily ever after. 

 

What’s the third option? 

 

You keep on lying to him but you won’t be able to do that forever because he’ll eventually find out or you’ll die from anxiety before you have the chance to tell him the truth. 

 

That’s a bit dramatic, don’t you think? 

 

You’re the one being dramatic about this whole thing 

I’m just trying to help here 

This is a fucked up situation 

 

I know, okay? 

Maybe we can just continue to talk to each other like that 

Nothing more, nothing less 

Maybe he’ll stop talking to me after the end of the Tour 

I’m not that interesting outside of my cycling career 

 

Jonas 

He thinks you sell bikes somewhere in Denmark and he sends you texts every single day 

Do you really think he would do that if he didn’t think you were interesting? 

 

I don’t know 

I don’t fucking know 

 

Okay 

Come over to my room, we’ll watch something together 

And don’t bring your phone, you need to clear your head  

Today has been tough  

 

Alright, I’ll be there in two minutes 

Thank you 

You know I love you, right? 

 

Yeah yeah, I know 

I love you too 

Even if your life choices are highly questionable

 

🖕🖕

 

 

Chapter 4: to fall

Notes:

I'm having way too much fun with it! I hope you still enjoy it!
I think I can keep up with one update per day, I'm having a blast writing it and I have so many ideas.

Thanks again for all the love, your comments are highly appreciated <3

8th of July, 2024 

01:54 pm  

 

 

Tadej 

*Image attachment: a picture of two chairs in a large room, surrounded by journalists waiting for the conference to begin*  

this is where they’re gonna sit  

it’s insane i've never been so close to them before  

azoiejgfojgo 🤯  

 

Oh wow, you’re really upfront   

Have fun!  

 

 

01:56 pm  

 

 

I can’t do this  

Woutje

Oh god, here we go again  

 

*Screenshot*  

Look  

He’s here  

 

Of course he is, I thought we were past the point of you freaking out about it  

 

No we’re not  

We’ve never been  

I’m sweating so much right now  

 

You won’t even know which one is Tadej   

 

That’s the thing  

It’s driving me insane  

 

I thought you didn’t care about his appearance?  

 

I genuinely don’t  

I don’t care what he looks like  

I just want to know  

 

Here’s the deal  

We go there, answer those questions with perfect PR-approved answers, then when it’s done, you linger a bit to see if you can catch his name  

I’ll help you  

 

Really?  

What if he tries to talk to me?  

 

You talk back  

 

You make it sound so easy  

 

Because it is, actually  

You’ve spent the last 10 days talking to him every day  

 

Through texts  

It’s not the same thing  

 

Just remember he doesn’t know Jonas the cyclist is actually Jonas the bike seller  

You’re his hero, his favorite cyclist  

If you happen to talk to him, he’ll be the one freaking out about it  

 

I don’t know if that makes me feel any better

 

Oh well 🤷‍♂️

I tried  

Now go in there and smile  

 

 

03:06 pm  

 

 

Woutje 

Okay so  

Are we going to talk about it?  

 

No  

 

Okay  

You know I can hear you scream in your pillow, right?  

 

Fuck off  

 

 

03:45 pm  

 

 

His eyes  

I can’t stop thinking about it  

It’s like I can’t escape his damn eyes  

They are grey, right? Or maybe blue?  

God I’m so stupid, I should have taken a better look  

 

Woutje

You literally stared at him for a whole minute  

 

Oh fuck I did that  

I stood there like an idiot   

 

He didn’t look any better  

 

I couldn’t utter a single word  

What is wrong with me??  

He must think I’m rude now  

 

Yeah no  

From the look on his face, he wasn’t thinking much  

 

What does that mean??  

 

The guy was fuckin starstrucked  

It was kind of disgusting to watch  

 

His cheeks were a bit red  

It was cute  

 

Ew  

🤢🤢

 

And his hair  

I was so fucking close to touching it   

 

Thank God you did not  

You’re really in deep, aren’t you?  

 

He’s just objectively handsome  

With the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen  

And the cutest freckles  

 

Okay that’s enough for today, I can’t hear any more of it  

Go flirt with your Slovenian boyfriend  

 

Don’t say shit like hat  

It makes my heart do weird stuff  

 

Fucking hell  

 

What do I do now?  

He hasn’t texted  

 

He’s probably still recovering from this whole interaction  

You should do the same thing  

 

I can’t   

I’m buzzing with energy right now  

I feel like I could climb the Tourmalet three times in a row  

 

Yeah, that’s what happens when you fall in love   

 

Don’t be ridiculous  

I’m not in love  

 

Sure  

 

I’m not  

 

Okay  

 

I know what you’re doing  

Stop that  

 

🥰🥰🥰

 

 

05:08 pm  

 

 

Tadej 

okay, that was the craziest day of my life  

 

Oh, what happened?  

 

wait, can i call u?  

it would be much easier to explain like that  

 

 

05:10 pm  

 

 

He wants to call me to explain what happened today  

But I know what happened  

Because I was there  

Also, he’ll immediately recognize my voice, right?  

 

Woutje

Maybe not  

Your voice sounds really different on the phone  

It’s like, much higher for some reason  

But it’s a risk, yeah  

 

Okay, I’m glad to know I sound like a child on the phone  

I kinda want to hear his voice, though  

Don’t say anything about being in love  

 

I was not going to   

 

😑😑

 

 

05:15 pm  

 

 

Yeah, okay  

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

 

Hm, hello?  

 

Jonas, hi! I hope I’m not bothering you. How was your day?  

 

No, no it’s okay. I was just watching some TV, nothing special. But tell me about yours. It sounded exciting.  

 

Oh god, it was! So, you know I had this press conference thing today?  

 

Yeah?  

 

I was a bit nervous I’m not gonna lie. But then Vingegaard and van Aert showed up and my brain just stopped working, I don’t know. It was unreal! And then Vingegaard answered some questions about Remco’s previous comments and oh my god!  

 

Yeah, I’ve heard about it.  

 

His answer was perfect! How he raced smartly and didn’t care about what other people thought about it. I almost screamed “that’s my guy”, but that would not have been very professional.  

 

Hm, I guess not.  

 

AND THEN. We kinda bumped into each other, don’t ask me how it happened, I don’t know. He looked at my accreditation and then his face was so red I was like what the hell? Then I realized I was standing in front of Jonas Vingegaard and I just couldn’t move, couldn’t say anything. I’m such a loser, why didn’t I say anything?  

 

Hey, you’re not a loser.  

 

Thanks, but I am. Then someone called him and he had to leave but he kept on looking at me, it was so weird. Like, I’ve been replaying this interaction in my head for the past 2 hours and I still can’t understand what happened.   

 

Oh. I’m sorry if it didn’t go as well as you expected.  

 

I didn’t expect much, to be honest. And I’m not disappointed either. I’m just... I don’t know. Is it weird if I say I felt something quite special when we looked at each other?  

 

No, it’s not weird.  

 

You must think I’m a delusional groupie at this point...  

 

Hey, don’t say that. Your feelings are your feelings, nobody can’t take that away from you. You’re not weird or a loser.   

 

Whatever, I’ll probably never meet him again, so. Anyway. You didn’t tell me about your day.  

 

Oh, right. I wasn’t working today so I slept a bit more than usual. I met up with some friends.  

 

Good for you! What did you do with them?  

 

We went for a bike ride. Nothing too intense but it was nice.   

 

Denmark is pretty flat, right?  

 

It is, yeah. Have you been there?  

 

I have, yeah. I have a friend who lives in Copenhagen. It’s so beautiful there!  

 

Oh, what’s his name? Maybe I know him?  

 

...  

Jonas, are you referring to our first conversation?  

 

No?  

 

I can hear you laugh! Stop making fun of me!  

 

I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It was just too easy.  

 

Hm, I’ll let it slide become you helped me feel a bit better.   

 

I did?  

 

Yeah. I don’t feel as dumb as I was feeling a few hours ago. Also, you have a very soothing voice. You could record audio books for a living.  

 

Damn, I guess I missed my chance.  

 

It’s never too late to reinvent yourself, you know.  

 

Yeah I suppose, but I’m a creature of habit.   

 

So, bikes?  

 

Bikes. It’s the only thing I’m good at.  

 

That’s what I thought when I was 20, turns out I had more skills than I thought.  

 

Isn’t it hard, following the Tour, after what happened?  

 

A little. At first, I was very angry. I couldn’t even look at a bike without crying. And then Primoz won the Tour and it was kind of magical to see. I knew I wouldn’t be able to achieve the goal of becoming a pro, but I still wanted to work in the cycling world.   

 

Why photography, though?  

 

I’ve always loved photography. Believe it or not, I was a very turbulent child-  

 

No way!  

 

Ha-ha.  

 

I’m sorry, go on.  

 

As I was saying before you rudely interrupted me, I was always running around and was never able to concentrate on something. But one day my mom took me and one of my sisters to an art gallery. There was this exhibition from a Slovenian photographer and honestly, I don’t even remember what it was about. I remember the feeling, though. I felt calm, which is not something I feel often. Sorry, it probably doesn’t make any sense.  

 

No, it does, actually.  

 

So, for my 10h birthday, my parents got me a camera. I took it everywhere with me, snapping pictures of everything. I still have it, somewhere, at my parents’ house.  

 

What about the pictures you had taken, back then? Do you still have them?  

 

Oh yeah, they’re really bad!  

 

Can I see them?  

 

You want to see them?  

 

Yes, of course. It was your first try at something you’re passionate about. They must be pretty special.  

 

Yeah, they are. People don’t really get that.  

 

I get it. Wait, someone’s at my door. I’ll be back in a sec.  

 

Okay.  

 

Sorry, I actually have to go. I had something planned with my friends.  

 

No, of course! I’m sorry, I speak way too much.  

 

You should really stop apologizing for being you, you know?  

 

Yeah, I’m-  

 

Don’t say you’re sorry!  

 

I wasn’t going to!  

 

You totally were.  

 

Yeah, I was.  

 

We’ll talk later?  

 

Yeah, sounds good. Have fun with your friends.  

 

Thanks. Bye, Tadej.  

 

Bye Jonas.  

 

 

Call ended – 35 minutes 28 seconds  

 

 

Woutje 

I heard you giggle  

You never giggle  

 

I know  

His voice

His fucking voice

 

Oh no

 

I’m in deep, aren’t I?  

 

You totally are  

 

Chapter 5: to open up

Notes:

How many times can I say "thank you" before it becomes too much? Who cares, because you guys are fucking amazing! Your comments make me laugh and fill me with so much joy, it's insane <3

Anyway, here is a little angst for you all haha, sorry about that.

Have a great day, see you tomorrow!

8th of July, 2024 

06:10 pm  

 

João 🤙

Oi  

I tried to call you twice man  

 

Tadeja 

oi oi  

sorry, i was already on the phone  

 

With who?  

 

it's none of your business  

 

Of course it is  

Tell meeeeee  

👀👀

 

a friend  

 

I thought I was your only friend  

 

shut up, i have plenty of friends  

 

🤨  

Who was it?  

 

you don’t know him  

anyway, what did you want?  

 

You’re hiding things pogi  

I don’t like that  

 

i’m not hiding anything, i just called a friend 🙄🙄  

 

What’s his name?  

 

u're a real pain in the ass, you know that?  

 

Yeah yeah whatever  

I’m bored, you have to entertain me  

 

how can u be bored? you’re riding the tour de france  

u should be enjoying the rest right now  

 

Well I don’t  

No fun in laying in bed  

That’s why I tried to call, by the way  

Do you want to come by and play some fifa?  

Then you can tell me more about that mysterious “friend” 😏😏

 

i won’t tell u anything  

and okay, send me your hotel’s address  

 

Oh you will  

😇😇

 

 

9th of July, 2024 

11:23 am  

 

 

Woutje  

So  

I’ve done some research  

 

We’re on the bus  

Just come and sit next to me  

 

I can’t  

It’s about your Tadej  

 

He’s not my Tadej  

And why did you do some research? You sound like fucking Spencer Reid from Criminal Minds  

 

Oh my god I love this show  

 

Wout, focus  

 

Sorry  

And I did it because he may be my best friend’s future husband  

I needed to do a background check you know  

 

Okay this is actually cute   

But I don’t need you to do that  

 

Alright, I won’t tell you what I found  

 

 

11:42 am  

 

 

Okay, what did you find?  

 

So  

His name is Tadej Pogačar, he was born on the 21 st of September 1998  

 

Wow, that’s an incredible piece of information  

 

I’m not done  

Did he tell you about his cycling career?  

 

Yeah. He was about to make it to a pro team but had a really big crash. It was actually very bad, I’m not really comfortable with you digging stuff about that  

 

It was not my intention, trust me  

I just thought it was kind of crazy that you two competed against each other  

 

Excuse me?  

 

Yeah, back in 2017  

Eschborn-Frankfurt  

 

Yeah, I vaguely remember that one. It was ages ago though  

 

Tadej was barely 19  

He ended up second  

 

Are you serious?  

I completely forgot about the podium on that one  

 

Yeah! He was like, really good  

And I mean, Tour de France winner worthy good, because his 2018 season was insane. A shame your calendars didn’t match, though  

UAE was about to sign him, it was actually the biggest contract for someone that young  

 

Oh wow  

 

If there had been no crash, he would probably have been here, but as a rider  

 

Fuck  

I had no idea  

Things would have been so different, between us  

 

Maybe not  

You’re still you, and he’s still him  

 

Yeah, but we would have met under different circumstances.   

And he probably wouldn’t have paid attention to me  

He would have been a legend. I can totally see it.  

 

Hey, are you okay?  

 

Yeah  

It’s just  

I don’t know  

 

I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you  

 

No, it’s okay, I’m fine  

 

You sure?  

 

Yep

We better listen to Grischa now, I can see him frown and I don't like that

 

Yeah you're right

 

 

08:46 pm  

 

 

Tadej 

hey  

 

Hey, how was your day?  

 

meh  

a bit tired, had a terrible sleep last night  

 

Oh, what happened?  

 

idk  

my mind was just spiraling  

it happens sometimes  

 

And how do you feel now?  

 

don’t know  

sorry, i’m not in the best mood  

 

What did I say about being sorry?  

 

ah shit  

you caught me  

 

We don’t have to talk if you need some time to yourself  

 

no  

i mean  

i’ve been looking forward to talking to you all day actually  

 

Oh  

Really?  

 

yeah  

i really want to apologize for being weird right now  

 

Don’t  

You’re not weird. Do you want to call?  

 

yes please  

 

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

 

Thank you  

 

You’re welcome. Do you want to talk about it?  

 

I don’t know. Maybe it’s the travelling all over the country. I’m not used to that. And I always get so excited about things but sometimes my energy just crashes down and I just want to lay down in the dark and sulk.  

 

That’s understandable. You run around all day, talking to different people, then editing at night. You have the right to be tired, you know.  

 

Yeah, but look at all the riders. They ride every day for hours, then they have to do media, then team meetings or whatever. Every day for three weeks.  

 

They’re athletes. They train all year long for this. And don’t think they don’t have meltdowns in those three weeks. It’s exhausting. The Tour is tiring for everyone, not only the riders.  

 

Yeah, I guess you’re right. Anyway, enough about me. Tell me something about you.  

 

Like what?  

 

I don’t know. Anything.   

 

Hum... I used to collect flowers as a kid.  

 

Really?  

 

Yeah. I put them all in a notebook. I gave them names because I thought their real ones were not fitting.   

 

This is the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.   

 

I took the notebook everywhere with me. During bike rides, at school. Then one of my classmates found it one day and made fun of it so I just stopped doing it.  

 

Okay, I’m gonna need names right now. Who could do something like that?   

 

It’s fine. We were just kids. I had to stop doing it, eventually.  

 

Why?  

 

I don’t know. I guess adults don’t do things like that?  

 

Bullshit. You should do it again. Buy a new notebook and pick up flowers. I will help you name them.   

 

Hm, that’s a nice idea.   

 

How do you say sunflower in Danish?  

 

Solsikke. Why?  

 

It’s sončnica in Slovenian. We can do a mix of both. Solsinica. That’ll be our new name for sunflowers.  

 

Sounds good. Better than the English word.  

 

Definitely.   

 

You sound tired.  

 

I’m exhausted.  

 

Yeah, me too. We should go to sleep.  

 

I don’t want to hang up.  

 

We don’t have to.   

 

Falling asleep on the phone, really?   

 

Too cheesy?  

 

Hm, probably. I don’t care, though.  

 

Yeah, me neither.  

 

Goodnight, Jonas.  

 

Goodnight, Tadej.  

 

 

 

09:26 pm  

 

 

João Almeida 

Hey Wout, how are you?  

I’m sorry to bother you right now, but I really need to talk to you  

 

Wout van Aert 

Hey man  

What’s up? Everything alright?  

 

I don’t know  

I’m going to ask you a question and it might sound weird but it’s really important  

 

Okay, you’re scaring me right now  

 

Sorry  

You and Jonas are close, right?  

I mean Jonas Vingegaard, of course  

 

Yeah, he’s my best friend  

Why?  

 

Did he tell you something about talking to a guy named Tadej?  

 

Why are you asking that?  

 

Just answer, please  

 

Yeah, he did  

Wait, do you know Tadej?  

 

Holy shit  

I knew it  

The second he showed me the texts I knew it was Vingegaard  

 

I’m fucking lost right now  

So you know Tadej the photographer?  

 

That’s how you call him?  

Yeah, I do, he’s one of my best friends  

We met in 2016 at a race  

Anyway, he came by yesterday and he told me about this friend named Jonas  

Explained the whole wrong number situation  

Then I thought about it. Jonas, Danish. Loves cycling and stuff. Always busy during the stages. Text like a fucking grandpa  

It’s Vingegaard, right?  

 

Fuck  

You can’t tell Tadej about it  

 

What the hell?  

Of course I’m gonna tell him!  

That dickhead is lying to my friend  

 

Don’t call him that, you know he’s not like that  

It just spiraled out of control  

He genuinely likes Tadej  

 

Of course he does, Tadej is the most amazing human being on this planet and your little champion is playing with him  

 

He’s not playing  

Shit  

He just answered to be polite at first then Tadej kept on texting him and Jonas grew fond of him but I guess he was scared of telling him who he really was and yeah  

 

Did you know they called each other yesterday afternoon?  

 

Yeah, I know  

 

Tadej told him about his crash. And how he ended up being a photographer. He told him about his childhood. He’s sharing pieces of himself with Jonas. Because for some reasons, he trusts him.  

Tadej never does that. He never shows anything to anyone. Even at the hospital after he crashed. Always smiling and everything.  

This is going to break him and I won’t allow that  

 

Fuck, I get where you’re coming from but  

Jonas really cares about him, trust me  

He talks about him all the fucking time  

He would never hurt him on purpose  

 

This is more than friendship, is it?  

 

Yeah, I think so  

 

Except Tadej doesn’t even know who he really is  

He’s just falling in love with a character  

 

Jonas could never hide who he really is, even if he tried. Every conversation they share is genuine.  

Listen, I know this is bad, okay? I told him about it, and he knows it  

Just, please  

Let’s wait until the end of the Tour, okay?  

 

Oh fuck off  

Just so that your precious leader can win you the Tour  

Because the yellow jersey is so much more important than Tadej’s feelings  

 

I never said that, god  

I don’t know Tadej, but I’m sure he’s a good person.  

I do know Jonas, though. And he’s the sweetest, kindest guy. He deserves to be happy after what happened to him and maybe he’s doing things wrong right now, but he should be the one telling the truth to Tadej.  

Just give him until the end of the Tour, okay?  

I promise his intentions are good and his feelings are genuine  

Please  

 

Right  

Okay  

I won’t tell Tadej, for now  

But the second the Tour is over, if he doesn’t say anything, I will  

 

Okay, yeah  

I will talk to him  

 

Good  

See you tomorrow, Wout  

 

Yeah, see you  

 

Chapter 6: to win

Notes:

HI THERE

I've been sick for the past two days like I can't stomach any food BUT this fic is keeping me alive
Again, I'm so overwhelmed by the reactions and comments and everything. I love that you guys are trying to guess what is going to happen haha

I hope you still like it. Much love <3

ALSO: I'm @/justcyclingstuffs on tumblr, come say hi, I'm really nice!

July 10th, 2024

 

05:01 pm 

 

 

Mor ❤️

My baby, you did it! We’re so proud of you, after everything that happened. Everyone cheered for you at home. We love you so, so much honey. Call us when you can, we miss you ❤️

 

 

05:12 pm 

 

 

Nathan 

That was phenomenal. You’re the strongest of them all, little Jonas. I’m actually in tears right now ! Enjoy the celebrations, you deserve it 💛

 

 

05:24 pm 

 

 

Seppie 

Can’t believe I’m missing this because of fucking Covid 🥺

YOU’RE A LEGEND MAN, so so proud and so thankful to witness this

Good luck for the remaining stages, you got this 💪💪

 

 

06:34 pm 

 

 

Tadej 

HE WON HE WON HE WON 

VINGEGAARD WON 

fuck, did you see that? 

that man is incredible 🤯🤯

and when he talked about his crash and cried? 

maybe it’s because it hit a bit too close to home for me but i cried too 

 

 

07:24 pm 

 

 

Woutje 

I’m waiting for you downstairs you superstar  

Hurry up 

 

 

08:48 pm 

 

 

Tadej 

You probably had a busy day, hope you’re alright 🙂

 

 

09:26 pm 

 

 

Hey!

Sorry, it was a crazy day actually, I didn’t have time to check my phone 

How was it? Did you enjoy the stage?  

Tadej

oh yeah, i did !!

*Image attachment: Jonas Vingegaard crossing the line first after a final sprint* 

*Image attachment: Jonas Vingegaard on the podium, smiling and waving at the crowd* 

i couldn’t get closer but yeah, it was a pretty special moment 

 

I bet it was 

Your pictures are amazing, by the way 

 

thanks! 🤗🤗

people must have been happy in denmark! 

 

They are, yeah 

But the Tour is not done yet 

 

i know, but it’s such a relief to see him win 

idk, it’s like a big fuck you to all of these people doubting him 

i'm really proud of him 

 

You are? 

 

yeah, ofc! 

i don’t know him but I know it must have been so hard 

coming back to training, being scrutinized by the whole world while recovering  

the tour is not done yet but he already won, somehow 

 

 

09:37 pm 

 

 

*Screenshot* 

Fuck 

I’m crying again 

Woutje

He’s right 

What you’ve done is incredible 

You can be proud of yourself, little one 

 

I am 

 

You should go to sleep, it’s going to be a long week 

I’ll meet you at your room tomorrow morning before breakfast 

I’d like to talk to you about something 

 

Is everything okay? 

 

Yeah, don’t worry about it, it can definitely wait 

 

Okay 

Thank you for today, it was amazing 

 

You were amazing 

Sleep well little one 

 

 

09:45 pm 

 

 

I bet he must feel relieved, too 

I’m sorry but I’m literally falling asleep on my phone lol 

I’ll call you tomorrow night, if that’s okay with you? 

Tadej

yeah of course! 

goodnight jonas 🫶

 

Goodnight Tadej 

❤️

 

 

11th of July, 2024 

 

11:08 am 

 

 

Woutje 

Jonas 

You need to pull yourself together 

 

How am I supposed to do that? 

João knows 

He’s going to tell him and Tadej is never going to speak to me ever again 

 

He’s not going to tell him 

Not before the end of the Tour 

 

He can always change his mind 

Fuck this is a nightmare 

 

He’s not that cruel 

He’s just a worried friend 

 

I hate that he needs to be worried 

I would never hurt Tadej 

Well, not on purpose  

 

I know 

But I mean, try to understand the situation from his point of view 

His friend is talking to his idol without knowing it, sharing personal things and stuff 

Tadej wouldn’t do that if he knew who you really were 

 

But this is who I am 

I’m Jonas the bike seller or whatever 

There is no difference 

 

Except there is 

I know you’re not playing a role when you’re talking with him 

Like it’s your real reactions and feelings and everything 

But in his head, you’re in Denmark, living a normal life 

And being a professional cyclist is actually a big part of your real life 

It’s a part of you 

 

I know 

And I really want to tell him the truth 

But I’m so fucking scared 

 

Why? 

 

What if he completely changes when he finds out about me? What if he only sees the Tour de France winner and nothing else? 

Or what if he gets really angry and just decides to block me? 

I’m not ready for that 

 

You’ll never know if you don’t try 

Maybe he’ll be pissed off at first, but you two have a special thing, no?  

I can see it when you talk about him 

I think everything will be fine 

 

I’m so sorry about this mess 

I should have listened to you in the first place 

 

Hey, no, it’s okay 

We all do weird shit when it comes to feelings 

 

And that’s the real problem, right? 

These feelings 

 

Feelings are not a problem to be solved, Jonas 

I know that your rational brain likes to think that way but 

It doesn’t work like that 

 

It sucks 

 

Sometimes, yeah 

And sometimes, it’s the best thing in the world 

We’ll be here soon. Try and focus on the stage, okay?  

 

Yeah 

Thank god for the distraction 

 

Yeah, make sure you don’t tell Grischa that the Tour is actually a distraction from your boys' problems 

 

It’s just one boy 

But yeah, I won’t tell him that 

 

 

07:54 pm 

 

 

Hello João, this is Jonas Vingegaard.  

Wout told me about your conversation. I just wanted you to know that I really care about Tadej. It’s actually a bit scary because I usually don’t get along with people that easily. But he’s different. He’s special. And I know he’s your friend and you’re just trying to protect him. I promise I’ll tell him right after the end of the Tour. 

 

João Almeida 

Hello. 

Look, I know you’re not a bad guy. I just think this is unfair for him. And I know you were probably scared about his reaction but he’s not a weird obsessive fan. Well, okay, maybe he’s a bit obsessed with you but he would never do something to make you uncomfortable. You could have told him right away. Everything would have been so much easier. 

 

I know. I know I messed up but I'm going to make it right. I still need to figure out how. 

 

Just be honest. That’s the least you can do. 

Good luck for tomorrow’s stage. 

 

Thank you. You too. 

 

 

08:47 pm 

 

 

Tadej 

*Image attachment: Biniam Girmay crossing the finish line first* 

*Image attachment: Primož Roglič in the yellow jersey on the podium, smiling* 

*Image attachment: Jonas Abrahamsen in the polka dot jersey, riding in the breakaway* 

what’s your predictions for the final jerseys? 

 

Hm, that’s a good question actually 

Girmay in green, I can already see it. It will be difficult for Philipsen to come back 

The polka dot is a tricky one. I’m really not sure. 

Primož will probably be in yellow at the end. He’s super strong this year. Everyone struggles to follow him. 

And Remco is gonna keep that white jersey for sure. 

 

hm, that’s a good analysis 🤔

not sure about the yellow one but 

 

We can’t be sure about anything during the Tour, that’s why it’s so special 

And those are amazing pictures by the way, I can’t get enough of them 

 

u’re making me blush again 

 

Again? 

Is it a recurrent event? 

 

i’m afraid it is 

thankfully, you’re not here to witness it 

 

That’s a shame, really. 

 

well 

there’s always this thing called facetime 

a great invention, by the way 

 

Oh 

Yeah 

 

maybe we could do that, instead of a regular call? 

 

I’m not sure 

 

oh, okay 

 

It’s not that I don’t want to 

I really do, actually 

It’s just 

I’m not ready yet 

 

hey, it’s okay 

i didn’t want to make you uncomfortable  

 

You never make me uncomfortable 

It’s the complete opposite 

It’s just a lot for now 

I’m sorry, it’s stupid 

 

no it’s not! 

don’t feel stupid for having boundaries  

 

I promise we’ll do it soon 

I mean calling on FaceTime 

God that sounded really wrong 

 

omg jonas lmao 

you’re really one of a kind 

 

I don’t think I am 

So, you’re not mad? 

 

of course not! 

i could never be mad at you 

 

Do you still want to call for a bit? 

 

obviously 

and just so you know 

u don’t need to ask  

you can call me anytime 

 

I’ll keep that in mind 

❤️

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

 

12th of July, 2024 

 

09:14 am 

 

 

Woutje 

I heard you last night 

 

Heard what? 

 

Talking 

Were you on the phone? 

 

Yeah, with Tadej 

We must have fallen asleep though, the call was still on when I woke up 

 

You fell asleep on the phone 

With Tadej 

 

Yeah 

Not the first time actually 

His breathing is quite soothing 

 

Okay this is bad 

 

What? Why? 

I know I have to tell him the truth, but I’m planning on doing it after the Tour, I promise 

 

I know 

What I meant was that you’re down bad 

I thought it was just a crush but 

You’re in love with him 

 

I’m not in love 

It’s affection 

Deep feelings of affection 

That’s it 

 

Bullshit 

Exhibit A: you hate, and I mean HATE talking on the phone. You actually never answer when I call you 

 

That’s not true! 

 

Exhibit B: the idea of him being mad at you is unbearable 

 

Yeah, can’t really deny that one 

 

Exhibit C: your brain just stopped working when you saw him for the first time 

It was like a love at first sight scene from a fuckin movie 

 

That’s not my fault, he’s just really handsome! 

 

Do you listen to yourself sometimes? 

 

Okay, and what if I’m in love? 

Would that be so bad? 

 

Of course not 

It’s just a lot of feelings you have to deal with 

And no offense but you're usually a mess when it comes to feelings

And it’s a tricky situation 

I’m just worried about you 

 

I’m fine 

He’s actually helping a lot 

The pressure, the exhaustion 

He’s like the breath of fresh air I needed  

Like I was drowning and he appeared from nowhere and now I wake up every morning and I want to know how he slept and what he thinks and what he likes

And it’s not only that 

He’s an incredible person, so full of passion and joy and he makes me laugh so much 

You’d really like him 

 

Yeah, I know 

Maybe I’ll properly meet him one day 

 

Maybe 

It would be nice 

 

Okay, enough of being emotional 

They’re waiting for us downstairs, let’s go 

 

I’ll be there in a sec 

 

 

09:34 am 

 

 

Tadej 

welcome to Agen! 

*Picture of the city in the background, hand holding a coffee in the foreground* 

 

Have a good day Tadej 🙂  

 

you too jo 😚

 

Jo?

 

jojo?

jay?

joni?

 

Oh my god stop that

Jonas is fine

 

i'll find something

 

Of course you will 🙄🙄

 

joey

 

TADEJ

 

sorry

byyyye ❤️

 

Bye ❤️

 

 

Chapter 7: to fear

Notes:

Good evening people (or morning or afternoon, whenever you're reading this)

SO, I don't think I'll be able to update every single day from now on. I'm gonna have a pretty busy week-end (I'm heading to Paris hehe), which means I'll only be able to write in the train (if I don't end up falling asleep), then a busy week at work.

I'll make sure to write as much as I can when I can. I hope it's alright with you !

I would also like to thank people on discord for being super nice and super supportive and also every single person who commented on this work. Your words make me so, so happy. Thank you again <3

12th of July, 2024 

 

08:37pm  

 

Tadej  

hey  

is everything alright? u looked like you were going to pass out at the end of the stage lol  

 

João 🤙 

Yeah I'm so fucking tired man  

But I’ll be sad when it’s done so I’m trying to enjoy it  

How are u doing?  

 

i’m great  

the atmosphere is unreal  

can’t wait for the next two mountain stages  

 

Yeah I don’t know if I’m looking forward to it but it should be interesting  

Still rooting for your danish superstar?  

 

u know i’m also rooting for you 🫶

but yeah, of course i am  

i hope he’s feeling well, there’s still a risk he’s going to crack at some point  

 

That’s a risk for everyone, really  

And what about your danish bike seller?  

 

what about him?  

 

Are you still talking to him?  

 

we text every night, yeah  

i really like him  

 

You don’t really know him, though  

 

i do  

i don’t know everything, of course  

but i feel like i know him in a way that matters, u know?  

like he truly sees me  

does it make sense?  

 

I’m not sure I understand but  

I just want you to be careful with this, okay?  

 

i don’t think i need to be “careful”, it’s not a big deal  

and i’m not a kid you know  

 

It feels like it is a big deal for you  

I don’t want you to get hurt  

 

why would i get hurt?  

are u scared he’s a serial killer or something?  

 

No, you dumbass 🙄

But where do you think this is gonna go?  

Are you planning on meeting him?  

 

idk! maybe, eventually  

i’m not planning on anything  

why are u so worked up about this?  

 

Because I have a bad feeling, okay?  

 

a bad feeling  

about jonas  

this is so stupid  

 

Sorry for being worried about my friend  

 

but you don’t need to be worried!!  

look, if i end up meeting him, i’ll send you the address so u can come find me if he ends up being a psychopath  

 

Very funny, Tamau  

 

i appreciate your concern  

you’re a good friend  

but i’ll be fine, okay?  

 

Yeah, whatever  

 

 

09:10 pm  

 

 

Tadej

please tell me you’re not a serial killer  

 

Jonas

I’m not a serial killer  

 

thanks  

i've told one of my friends about you and he's pulling the “don’t speak to strangers on the internet” thing on me  

 

I mean, he’s not totally wrong  

There are really weird people online  

 

but we didn’t meet online  

i texted the wrong number  

it’s completely different  

 

Hey, you don’t have to convince me, you know  

I’m really glad you texted the wrong number  

But it’s normal for your friends to find the situation a bit strange  

 

did u tell someone about this? about me?  

 

I told my best friend, yeah  

 

what did he say?  

 

Something similar to what your friend said  

But he’s supportive  

Thinks I’m a bit annoying but  

 

why?  

 

Because app arently, I talk a lot about you  

He’s wrong, obviously  

 

oh, is that so?  

and what do u say about me?  

 

Nothing  

 

jonaaaaas  

tell me  

 

No more weird nicknames?  

 

i’m still trying to find the right one  

now stop trying to distract me  

tell me what you said  

 

That you’re a stubborn pain in the ass  

 

i know it’s not true  

you don’t think i’m a pain in the ass  

 

You’re right, you’re not  

 

so, what am I?  

 

Funny  

Talkative, in a good way  

Really talented  

Smart  

Caring  

An overall amazing person, really  

 

jonas 🥺🥺

you can’t say shit like that  

i’m sensitive  

 

You wanted to know!  

 

god  

you better not be a serial killer because i really like you and that would be bad  

 

I promise you I’m not  

And I really like you too  

 

good  

now, are u freel to call?  

 

Always  

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

 

13th of July 

 

10:47 am  

 

 

Woutje  

Are you ready?  

 

I don’t know  

I feel good but I don’t think it’s going to be enough  

 

Just do your best, okay?  

Focus on the yellow jersey, we’ll pull for you  

 

Okay  

 

 

07:04 pm  

 

 

Fucking hell  

I can’t sit here and listen to that shit anymore  

 

Woutje

Hey, it’s okay  

It’ll be done in no time, then we eat, then the massage, then you’ll be able to rest  

 

I’m not even hungry  

 

Jonas, stop that  

You didn’t lose that much time  

 

50 seconds  

It’s now almost 2 minutes behind Roglič  

 

2 minutes after almost two weeks  

I know you were expecting way worse  

You’re still here, and you’re still fighting  

 

I don’t know if it’s really worth it  

 

Of course it is  

Don’t give up now  

 

I won’t  

You know I won’t  

It’s just hard  

 

I know  

But you’re doing great, okay?  

You’re doing exactly what you’re supposed to do  

 

Thanks Woutje

I'll do my best

 

You always do, little one

 

 

08:50 pm  

 

 

Tadej 

this was such a shitty day  

 

What happened? Are you okay?  

 

yeah yeah i'm fine  

some people are just rude  

 

Do you want me to beat someone up?  

 

lmao jonas!  

you’re not that kind of guy  

 

No I’m not  

I’m probably not built for that either  

 

how tall are u?  

 

I don’t know, 1,75m? Something like that  

But I'm quite thin so  

 

we’re the same height!  

and yeah, not really bulky either  

would probably lose a fight against a child  

 

Well, if it’s the two of us, we could win  

 

against a child?  

 

Yeah!  

 

omg 😭😭

why are we talking about hitting a poor child?  

 

To save your honor, obviously  

 

obviously  

well, no need to hit anyone  

but that’s nice of you, i guess  

 

Do you want to tell me what happened?  

 

nothing serious, just me being whiny because it was a long day  

 

I get it  

We can whine about people together  

 

that's a great idea  

i'll start  

i hate when people bump into you and don’t even apologize  

 

You’re right, that’s rude  

I hate when people say “something greater will come” when something shitty happens like, I’m allowed to be sad about it I don’t need your optimism thank you very much  

 

oh my god exactly like give me a second to cry about it damn it  

i hate people who make fun of you because you mispronounce things even though you make the effort of speaking in a foreign language  

 

Did someone make fun of your accent?  

 

it happens a lot, it’s actually not a big deal  

 

I think your accent sounds lovely  

I love it  

 

❤️❤️❤️

thank you jonas  

your turn  

 

I hate when people assume things about you and don’t even try to really know you before making up scenarios that aren’t even real because they don’t really care about you, they just like the drama  

 

ouch  

i hate when people say that it’s a good thing i became a photographer, that it was meant to be, as if me getting hit by a car was part of a prophecy or something  

 

Oh Tadej  

I’m so sorry  

 

don’t be  

i’m actually feeling a lot better now  

we should whine about people more often  

 

We totally should  

 

thank you  

it's like you know what i need and i don’t even have to ask  

 

I’m glad I could make you feel a bit better  

I’m usually not great with people’s emotions and stuff  

 

i must be pretty special, then

 

You are, no doubt about it  

 

 

14th of July, 2024 

 

08:14 pm  

 

 

Woutje 

I know what you’re thinking  

Stop thinking that  

 

I’m really not in the mood right now  

I’m allowed to be sad, okay?  

 

It’s just 3 minutes  

You can still do it  

 

Wout, please  

I love you  

And I don’t want to be rude to you  

 

Okay  

What do you need?  

 

To be alone  

I’m sorry  

 

It’s okay  

Text me if you change your mind  

 

Thanks  

 

 

09:03 pm  

 

 

Incoming call – Jonas 

 

Tadej

Jonas! I was about to send you a text. How was your day?  

 

Hey, Tadej. Not great, actually.  

 

Oh, I’m sorry. Do you want to talk about it?  

 

No, I just wanted to hear your voice.  

 

Well, I can talk for two, if that’s what you need?  

 

That would be perfect, actually.  

 

Okay, then. It was a really busy day. Mountains stages are always a bit hectic, with all the staff and the people being crazy on the sides of the road. This one was extra special because there was the Tourmalet climb, and it’s such an iconic climb in the Tour de France. It was my first time being there actually and it was beautiful.  

 

Also, I saw an old couple on the side of the road, and they were so cute! They were wearing matching t-shirts and hats and they had a dog with them, and it was also wearing a hat. I’ll send you a picture, if you want to see it.  

 

Yeah, sure.  

 

Well, of course, it was not the ending I was hoping for. Vingegaard losing a bit more time. People say it’s going to be impossible for him to turn things around but- Jonas?  

 

Hm?  

 

Are you... Are you crying?  

 

No?  

 

Yes, you are.  

 

No I’m not.  

 

Jonas.  

 

I’m sorry.  

 

Hey, no, don’t apologize. What’s going on?  

 

I-I can’t really tell you about it.  

 

You know you can tell me anything, right? I won’t judge you or anything.  

 

I know. I know but... It’s complicated. I just... I just need a minute.  

 

Do you want me to hang up?  

 

No! No, please, I-  

 

It’s okay. I won’t go anywhere. I’m right here, okay?  

 

Okay.  

 

It’s going to be okay. Just breathe for me, alright? That’s it. You’re okay.  

 

Are you feeling a bit better?  

 

Yeah. Thank you. I really needed that.  

 

Of course. Do you want me to stay on the phone while I’m working on editing?  

 

I don’t want to bother you.  

 

You never bother me, silly. You sound like you’re about to fall asleep. I don’t want you to feel alone.  

 

That would be nice, actually.  

 

Okay. I’m probably going to speak to myself in Slovenian from time to time. It happens a lot when I’m working.  

 

It’s perfect.  

 

Okay, then. Try to get some sleep.  

 

You won’t hang up, right?  

 

No, I won’t. I’ll stay right here, I promise.  

 

Okay. Thank you, Tadej.  

 

Lahko noč, Jonas.  

 

Hm?  

 

It means “Goodnight”.  

 

Oh. I like the sound of it. Godnat, Tadej.

 

 

Chapter 8: to realize

Notes:

HEY!

Oh god, I'm really nervous about this one. Anyway, I hope you'll still like it!
Get ready for 7 more chapters (I think). It's so long and so short at the same time but I think it's the perfect lenght for this one.

Thank you for your lovely DMs, comments and kudos. They are much appreciated <3

15th of July, 2024 

 

09:12 am  

 

 

Tadej 

hey  

i hope you’re feeling better  

also, u talk in your sleep  

 

Oh god, I forgot about that  

 

don’t worry, it was in danish, i didn’t understand a single thing  

 

I don’t think it made much sense, anyway  

Thank you for last night  

You really helped  

 

i didn’t do much  

i wish i could have done more, actually  

i’m a great hugger  

 

Oh, really?  

Well, I guess I will have to make my own opinion about that  

 

deal!  

but really, how are you?  

 

I’m okay, I think  

Better than yesterday, for sure  

 

i’m glad to hear it  

i’m going on a bike ride this morning, i’ll send you some pics!  

 

Sounds great  

Be careful  

 

i will  

call tonight?  

 

Yeah 🙂

 

okay  

❤️  

 

 

10:14am  

 

 

Woutje  

Are you coming with us for the ride this morning?  

 

It’s not like I have much choice  

 

I’m sure Grischa would let it slide  

 

No, it’s fine  

There’s still a week left  

I can’t wallow in self-pity yet  

 

Did you call Tadej last night ?  

 

Are you going to judge me and tell me I should be honest with him?  

 

No  

I just want to make sure you were not totally alone  

 

I wasn’t  

I cried on the phone like a child and he was the sweetest   

Didn’t push when I told him I didn’t want to talk about it  

 

He’s a good guy  

I’m glad he was there for you  

 

You were there, too  

I wouldn’t be here without you, you know that  

 

Hey, it’s not the end of the Tour  

Keep your love confessions for Sunday   

All of them  

😏😏 

 

🙄🙄

I’ll be there in 10  

 

👍

 

 

11:02 am

 

 

Wout  

Wout  

Wout  

WOUT  

 

Woutje

WHAT  

 

He’s here  

Oh god  

 

Who??  

 

Tadej  

On the fucking parking lot  

With João

 

I didn’t know UAE stayed at this hotel  

 

Yeah, me neither  

Okay, it’s okay  

I’m not panicking, it’s cool  

 

You’re totally panicking  

 

OF COURSE I AM  

I need to hide  

 

Dude, he still doesn’t know it’s you  

Well, he might figure it out if you keep on looking at him like that  

 

 

11:05 am  

 

 

Matteo 

Is Jonas okay?  

He looks like he’s going to throw up  

 

Wout 

Oh yeah  

He’s just dealing with stuffs  

 

Is it because of yesterday?  

 

Hm not really  

 

What’s happening  

 

Okay, I can’t do this anymore  

 

Wout added Jonas

 

Jonas 

What is this?  

 

This is me getting help, okay?  

 

Matteo  

Oh god have you killed someone?  

I can’t go to prison, I won’t last two days   

 

What?  

Of course not wth??  

 

Jonas 

Do you really think we could kill somebody?  

Look at me!  

 

Matteo 

Look at Wout!  

 

Jonas 

Yeah, makes sense  

 

I have the worst teammates istg  

 

Matteo 

So, what’s going on and how can I help?  

 

Jonas has fallen in love with a Slovenian photographer   

 

Jonas  

WOUT  

 

Matteo 

Aw that’s cute!!  

 

Yeah no  

Because actually, the Slovenian kid thinks Jonas is a bike seller in Denmark  

 

Matteo 

Why would he think that  

 

Because that’s what Jonas told him  

 

Matteo 

Why did you say that  

 

Jonas 

I don’t know, okay??  

He texted me thinking I was one of his co-workers and he’s a big fan of cycling and he's actually following the Tour for a Slovenian media but he was nice and funny and for one moment I didn’t want to be Jonas Vingegaard  

 

But he’s friend with João and João knows that Jonas is Jonas Vingegaard  

 

Matteo 

Oh lord  

What a mess  

 

And then they fell in love and Jonas is supposed to tell him the truth at the end of the Tour but Tadej is actually here today and he’s freaking out  

 

Matteo 

Wait  

Tadej is the Slovenian kid, right?  

 

Jonas  

He’s not a kid  

But yeah  

 

Matteo  

Wdym he’s here?  

 

Look up  

Between João and Adam, next to the team bus  

That’s Tadej  

 

Matteo  

Oh  

He’s cute!  

 

Jonas  

Of course he is  

Wait, what are you doing?  

STOP WAVING  

 

Matteo  

Why?  

I know we’re supposed to be rivals but they’re nice  

 

Jonas  

I don’t care about them  

I can’t speak with Tadej  

 

Matteo 

What’s the problem?  

He doesn’t know that you’re phone Jonas, right?  

 

Jonas   

Yeah but we’ve been calling each other every night for the past few days  

He’s going to recognize my voice at some point  

 

Matteo  

Oh  

Well  

Sorry?  

 

I already told you your voice is much different in real life  

 

Matteo 

It’s weird though  

If he’s a fan, he probably watches interviews and stuffs  

   

Maybe he’s dumb  

 

Jonas  

Hey, don’t say that! He's not dumb  

He’s just not very observant?  

 

And a little bit deaf  

 

Jonas 

Wout!  

Stop laughing you dickhead  

 

Sorry sorry 

 

Jonas 

Oh no, they’re coming  

What do I do??  

 

Matteo 

Just smile and nod  

It’s not that different from your usual self  

 

Jonas 

I’m so fucked  

 

I’m not paid enough to deal with this shit  

 

Matteo 

I’m having so much fun  

Best Tour ever  

 

 

01:44 pm  

 

 

João 🤙

Are you okay?  

You didn’t talk much during the ride  

 

Tadeja

i’m a bit rusted, you’re too fast for me  

 

Stop that, it was an easy ride  

So?  

 

i’m fine  

it’s just  

do you think jonas vingegaard hates me or something?  

 

What??  

What makes you think that?  

 

idk  

he didn’t speak at all  

and he looked really uncomfortable  

is he always like that?  

 

Yeah, he’s not great at socializing   

Doesn’t speak much in the peloton  

Don’t take it personally  

 

oh okay  

yeah, that was stupid actually  

he doesn’t even know me lol  

 

Yeah haha  

Don’t worry about it  

Fifa?  

 

sure!  

 

 

03:51 pm  

 

 

João Almeida 

When  

 

Jonas Vingegaard

Excuse me?  

 

When are you planning on talking to Tadej?  

 

At the end of the Tour  

I promised  

 

He thinks you hate him  

 

What?  

 

*Screenshot* 

 

Is that how you see me?  

How the rest of the peloton sees me?  

 

It’s not about you  

I don’t care if you’re shy or whatever  

 

I didn’t mean to seem rude  

I just didn’t want to talk much so he doesn’t recognize my voice  

 

I still can’t believe he hasn’t figured out yet  

 

Sometimes I wish he did  

 

Yeah, because you’re a coward and it would be easier for you  

 

I know I am  

Do you think he’ll be mad?  

 

Honestly?  

I don’t know  

He really likes you  

Like  

Really  

 

I like him too  

A bit too much, I think  

 

I don’t think it’s possible to love someone too much  

 

I didn’t say anything about love  

 

You didn’t have to  

I saw the way you looked at him  

It’s the only reason why I’m not telling him right now  

Because I know you care  

You don’t talk much but your eyes say a lot of things

 

I should be focusing on the Tour right now and all I can think about is him  

I don’t know how to deal with it  

 

I can’t really help you with that  

 

No I know  

And you don’t owe me anything  

 

I don’t  

But I’d do anything to make sure Tadej is happy  

 

It’s only six more days  

I have to focus on the end of the Tour now  

And don’t say Tadej is less important than that for me because it’s not true  

But my whole team is counting on me right now and I can’t let them down  

 

I know, I understand and I respect that  

And Jonas  

You’re not a coward  

You’re awkward and you obviously make bad decisions when it comes to your personal life  

But you’re strong and fierce and reliable and I think you could be good for Tadej  

 

Oh  

Thank you João  

Not for the awkward part, obviously  

 

Sorry  

I still don’t entirely like you  

 

You’re far from being the only one  

But your opinion matters way more, so  

Thank you for understanding my point of view  

 

It’s fine  

Good luck for the last week  

 

Yeah, thanks  

You too  

 

 

09:16 pm  

 

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

 

Tadej

Hey! Sorry, I didn’t ask if you were busy or not.  

 

Jonas

It’s okay, I wasn’t. How was the ride?  

 

Great! A bit tiring but it felt good. What about your day?  

 

I met up with some friends, too. Nothing special, really.  

 

You always say that.  

 

What?  

 

That nothing special ever happens during your day.  

 

Because it’s true.  

 

Really? I don’t think it’s statistically possible.  

 

I don’t know if you can be trusted with statistics.  

 

Hey! That’s rude.  

 

Sorry.  

 

You’re not sorry, I heard you laugh.  

 

Yeah, sorry again.  

 

It’s okay, I like your laugh.  

 

Oh. Thank you?  

 

It sounds weirdly familiar, though.

 

Really? It’s quite a generic laugh, I think.  

 

I don't think that's a thing.

 

It is!

 

Anyway. Hey, you never told me where you lived, in Denmark.  

 

You never told me where you lived, in Slovenia.  

 

I come from Klanec. It’s a small village in Komenda. Now I live between Nice in France, and Ljubljana.  

 

Which one do you like the most?  

 

Between Nice and Ljubljana?  

 

Yeah.  

 

Ljubljana, for sure. But Nice is quite convenient for work.  

 

Hm, I get it.  

 

So, what about you?  

 

Well, hm. I was born in Hillerslev. It’s quite far from Copenhagen.  

 

And now?  

 

Now?  

 

Where do you live? Like, not the exact address, obviously. I’m just curious.  

 

Glyngøre. It’s hum.. A really small town, in the North. You probably never heard of it.  

 

I did, actually.  

 

Really?  

 

Yeah. I think I read something about Jonas Vingegaard coming from there, too.  

 

Oh. Maybe. I don’t know.  

 

Well, I can be wrong. As you said, it’s a small town. You’d know it if Jonas Vingegaard lived there, too.  

 

Yeah, I suppose.  

 

Anyway. I still have some work to finish up.  

 

Yeah, right. Hm, are you okay? You sound a bit... Tense.  

 

Oh, really? No, I feel fine. Maybe it’s the stress from running around everywhere.  

 

Yeah, probably. It’s only a few days left, now. Then you can rest.  

 

Yeah. You too.  

 

Me too?  

 

You must be very busy at the shop, no? With people being excited about the Tour and wanting to buy a bike to become the next Vingegaard.  

 

Oh, yeah. Tadej, about that, I-  

 

We’ll talk tomorrow, okay? Have a good night, Jonas.  

 

O-Okay. Have a good night, too.  

 

 

09:46 pm  

 

 

Jonas

He knows.

 

Woutje

Who knows what?  

 

Tadej

He knows who I am

 

Matteo

Did you tell him??  

I thought you were waiting until the end of the Tour  

 

I didn’t say anything

 

Matteo

Wdym?

What did he say??  

 

Nothing

I mean, not directly

But he asked me very specific questions

And he sounded so weird  

I was ready to spill everything but he just said good night and hung up

 

Matteo

Oh  

Maybe he was upset about something else  

 

No  

I know him  

Well, I know him enough  

 

Woutje

Do you think João said something?  

 

No, we texted earlier in the day  

Tadej asked him if I (as Jonas Vingegaard) hated him because I didn’t say anything when we met before the ride  

But it was actually a good conversation  

I mean, he’s not completely happy with me right now but it was close enough  

 

Woutje

Okay  

Well, maybe Matteo’s right  

Maybe something else is going on  

For now, you can’t really do anything about it  

Just focus on the remaining stages and you’ll talk to him in Nice, alright?  

 

But what do I do in the meantime?  

 

Matteo

Improvise  

If he’s back to his normal self tomorrow, then great, just act as usual and stick to the plan  

And if he’s not then  

Maybe stop texting him until the last stage?  

 

I don’t know if I can do that  

And it would be kind of rude  

 

Woutje

Well, it’s rude to lie to him, so  

 

Wow, thanks a lot

 

Woutje

Sorry, but it’s the truth  

You knew something like that could happen

 

 

Yeah

Whatever

I don’t care

I’ll stop thinking about it and I'll focus on the Tour because it’s the only thing I’m good at

Oh no, wait, I screwed this up too

 

 

Jonas left the group 

 

 

Wout

Great  

That’s just perfect  

 

Matteo

Well  

What a first Tour, right  

 

Wout

Right  

Wlecome to the team, I guess

 

Chapter 9: to pretend

Notes:

Okay, first of all, if you're still here : I love you, you're the best, I hope your day is filled with joy and nice bike rides

Second of all : if this one doesn't make sense to you, it's okay. You'll get it later. I hope so, at least.

Third of all : I'm really sorry. Trust the process.

Okay, byyyyyye <3

16th of July, 2024 

 

10:03 am  

 

 

Tadej  

hey  

i'm sorry about yesterday, i was tired and stressed about some work stuff  

shouldn’t have hung up like that  

 

Hey  

No, it’s okay, I understand  

 

no it’s not, really, i felt bad right after  

then i couldn’t sleep  

should have called you back  

 

Tadej, it’s fine, I promise  

We all have our moments  

I hope you feel better, now  

 

yeah, thanks  

talk later?  

 

👍

 

 

11:10 am  

 

 

Woutje 

Did Tadej text you already?  

 

Why do you care  

 

Oh, come on  

I’m sorry about yesterday  

 

It’s fine  

Listen, let’s just forget about it, okay?  

 

Jonas  

I was just frustrated because I know the situation is not easy for you  

 

It’s not  

But you’re right, it’s all my fault  

And I don’t want to talk about it anymore  

 

I’m really sorry  

 

You have no reason to be  

I gotta talk to Merijn, see you later  

 

Okay  

 

 

11:24 am  

 

 

Wout van Aert 

Hey  

Did you hear about something happening between Tadej and Jonas?  

 

João Almeida

What do you mean?  

 

Jonas thinks Tadej knows the truth  

 

I didn’t say anything to Tadej  

 

No, I know  

But Jonas told me he was being weird on the phone last night  

Then we kind of argued and now he won’t talk to me  

 

Weird how?  

And why did you two argue?  

 

I don’t really know, like asking specific questions  

I don’t know much  

And I guess I’m getting tired about this whole mess so I’ve been quite harsh to him  

Tried to apologize but he insists on focusing on the Tour and everything is shit  

 

Yeah, I’m getting tired too  

I’ll try to get more info tonight, okay?  

 

Okay  

Thanks mate  

 

No worries  

 

 

06:54 pm  

 

 

João 🤙

Hey man  

 

Tadeja

hey, what’s up?  

 

Just wanted to check on you  

Your Insta is blowing right now!  

 

yeah i know!  

i’m glad people are enjoying my work  

 

Your pictures are the best, everyone talks about them  

 

thanks 😊

wasn’t expecting that  

 

Well, I’m not surprised  

 

actually, i don’t have that much work tonight  

can we hang out for a bit?  

 

Yeah, of course!  

*Maps: location* 

8:30pm?   

 

yep!  

 

 

08:16 pm  

 

 

Woutje 

You were very quiet today  

 

Jonas

Just trying to focus on my job  

 

Hey, don’t shut me down  

You know you can talk to me  

 

It’s just a bit too much, okay?  

I’m trying my best right now and I know it’s not enough but I can’t do more  

I can’t  

 

It’s enough, Jonas  

What you do for the team is enough  

Remember what you told everyone on the first day  

That it’s already a win to be here  

 

I know  

But it’s kinda hard to stay optimistic right now  

Tadej made everything better but  

Yeah  

 

I suppose he didn’t text you?  

 

He did  

This morning  

He apologized for hanging up abruptly last night  

 

That’s a good thing, right?  

Probably means that something else had upset him  

 

Yeah, maybe  

I don’t know  

I think I want to tell him the truth  

I’m tired of lying  

 

Really?  

Like, right now?  

 

No  

I’m not sure how I’d deal with a negative reaction and I still need to survive the last stages  

But right after  

 

How do you plan to do this?  

 

I don’t know  

I guess I’ll just have to rip the bandage  

Maybe ask him if he wants to meet somewhere and then just show up  

 

That’s a good plan  

 

I just need to be brave enough to do it  

 

You’ll be  

 

I’m really sorry for getting angry at you  

It wasn’t fair  

 

It’s okay, don’t worry about it  

I’m going to facetime the kids, do you wanna say hi to them? They’ve been asking for you   

 

Yeah, that would be great   

I think I need this more than they do  

 

You can use my children as your therapists anytime  

 

I don’t think Sarah would be too happy about it  

 

I don’t think she’d care  

She has a soft spot for you  

 

I do too  

She’s my favorite van Aert  

 

Hey  

Rude  

 

Joking  

My favorite’s Jerome  

 

🙄🙄

 

 

09:26 pm  

 

 

Jonas

Hey  

Is everything okay?  

 

Tadej

hi  

sorry, i’m spending the night with a friend  

it was kind of a last-minute thing  

 

Oh  

It’s okay, have fun  

 

thanks, have a good night  

 

 

11:25 pm  

 

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

Missed call – Tadej 

 

 

17th of July, 2024 

 

08:24 am  

 

 

Jonas 

Hey, did you try to call me last night?  

Are you okay?  

 

it was a mistake, sorry  

 

It’s fine  

Did you have fun with your friend?  

 

yeah  

i'm sorry, I don’t really have time to talk right now  

 

Yeah, of course  

Call tonight?  

 

i’ll let you know  

have a good day  

 

Thank you

You too  

 

 

10:16 am  

 

 

Jonas

I need your help  

 

Woutje 

What’s going on?  

 

I can’t deal with medias before the stage  

I can’t deal with people, actually  

I need you to make sure nobody tries to talk to me except for the team  

 

Why?  

Are you sick?  

 

No  

Just  

Please  

 

Yeah okay  

I got you  

 

Thank you  

You're the best

 

 

11:15 am  

 

 

Matteo 

Did I miss something?  

Because Jonas looks like he’s about to cry   

Or throw up

 

Wout

Yeah, things are getting chaotic right now  

 

Shit  

What can I do?  

 

If someone wants to talk to him, tell them they can’t  

Just make something up, idk  

 

Okay  

 

Thanks, I’ll tell you everything later  

 

It’s fine  

I don’t need to know the details, I just want to make sure Jonas is okay  

 

He will be  

 

 

06:54 pm  

 

 

Woutje 

You did great little one  

I’m really proud of you  

 

Jonas

Thanks  

I did everything I could on the descent  

 

It was brilliant  

How do you feel  

 

Sore  

Exhausted  

But rather calm  

 

That’s good  

You go relax, I’ll see you at dinner  

 

Yeah, see you  

 

 

08:45 pm

 

 

Tadeja 

I know  

 

João 🤙

You know what?  

 

And I know you know  

But I don’t know why you kept it from me  

Or why he did that  

Or why I’m fucking crying right now  

 

Tadej  

 

I’m really angry   

At you, and myself  

But I’ll be very sad by the end of the night  

And I’ll probably need you, so  

 

Tadej, I’m so sorry  

I’ll explain everything  

 

No, don’t even try  

I just want to hear his voice one last time and pretend  

For now he’s still a bike seller from Denmark and not a cycling legend who probably had a good laugh  

And I’m just a photographer from Slovenia and not an idiotic fool for thinking that any of this was real  

And it’ll be enough for tonight  

 

Tadeja   

It’s not what you think  

He was going to tell you  

Tadej  

Tadej answer the phone

???  

 

 

08:54 pm  

 

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

 

Jonas

Tadej, hi! I didn’t expect you to call.  

 

Oh, why? Are you busy?  

 

No, no, I’m not. But you didn’t seem well this morning, so. Yeah.  

 

Yeah, sorry about that. I’ve been dealing with... Stuff. Lots of stuff.  

 

Is it work? Do you want to talk about it?  

 

Not really. I’ve been spending the last two days thinking about it and I think I need some distraction.  

 

I can do that. I know a lot of random facts about random things.  

 

I love random facts. Go ahead.  

 

Did you know the average person spends about 6 years of their life dreaming?  

 

Really? That’s a lot!  

 

And that doesn’t include daydreaming.  

 

I feel like you’re the type of person to daydream a lot.  

 

I am, yeah.   

 

Okay, tell me something else.  

 

Do you know what a ultracrepidarian is?  

 

That’s a really complicated word. But no, I don’t.  

 

It’s a person who tries to offer opinions or expertise on topics which they are not actually knowledgeable about.  

 

Oh, I know a lot of ultrac-ultracap-ultrape-  

 

Ultracrepidarian.  

 

Yeah, that. Okay, one more.  

 

You can fall in love in as less as four minutes. But only 1% of falling in love actually ends in a relationship.  

 

What? No, that can’t be true!  

 

That’s what the statistics say.  

 

The statistics are bullshit!  This is... This is so unfair.  

 

But that’s the beauty of it, no?  

 

No! There’s no beauty here. Only 99% of people who get their hearts broken.  

 

You can fall in love multiple times in your life. Sometimes, it just doesn’t work out.  

 

But what if you can’t fall in love anymore? What if you found the perfect person but you can’t be with them?  

 

Then it wasn’t the perfect person.  

 

But it was.  

 

Tadej?   

 

It’s just- It doesn’t make sense.   

 

I can hear you sniffle. Are you okay?  

 

Tell me something joyful.  

 

Tadej are y-  

 

Please?  

 

Yeah, okay. Huh... A chicken once lived for 18 months without a head.  

 

That is not joyful at all!  

 

But it’s funny! I can hear you laugh.  

 

It’s kind of funny, yeah. Poor chicken.  

 

May it rest in peace.  

 

In the chickens’ heaven.  

 

Do you want more fun facts?  

 

No, it’s okay.   

 

Guess I’ll have to keep some for next time.  

 

Yeah, I guess so.   

 

Are you coming back to Slovenia after the Tour?  

 

No, I don’t have time. I’ll stay in Nice for a couple of days then head to Paris for the Olympics.  

 

Oh, that’s great! That’s a huge deal.  

 

It is, yeah. I love Paris.

 

It's a special place, yeah.

 

It’s the kind of city where anything can happen.  

 

Yeah, you're right.  

 

Are you asleep?  

 

No. Don’t think I’ll be able to sleep tonight.  

 

Why?  

 

Too much going on in my head.  

 

Yeah, happens a lot to me, too.  

 

Do you wish things were different, sometimes?  

 

Different like what?  

 

Like you had a different job, a different day-to-day life.  

 

Yeah, sometimes. But it usually doesn’t last. I like my life. You?  

 

Same. And it’s not really good to dwell on the “what ifs”.  

 

I guess not. But it’s nice to escape real life, sometimes.  

 

It is. But it never lasts.   

 

The majority of things in life don’t last. Doesn’t mean we can’t enjoy it while it’s there.  

 

That’s what I try to do, I think. Enjoying things in life, even when I know it’s temporary.  

 

I think I still have to improve on that. When did we become so serious?  

 

Sorry, that’s on me.  

 

It’s alright.   

 

I should go, I have some work to do.  

 

Of course. Hey, do you have something planned for Sunday night?  

 

Huh, not really. I’m just heading back home when the podium ceremony is over.  

 

Okay.  

 

Why?  

 

I’m just curious. Have a good evening, Tadej.  

 

You too, Jonas. I... Huh...  

 

What is it?  

 

It’s been really nice talking to you, Jonas the bike seller. I'm glad I met you. You’re... You're very special.  

 

Oh. Hum... Thank you, but-  

 

Bye.  

 

 

Call ended – 31 minutes 32 seconds 

Chapter 10: to hide

Notes:

Hi everyone!

Another *emotional* chapter. Hope you're still enjoying it, as much as I enjoy writing it. Thank you so much again for all your comments and dms <3

Feel free to send me your assumptions on what's going to happen, I love reading those!

18th of July, 2024 

 

08:54 am  

 

 

João Almeida

Are you alone right now?  

 

Wout van Aert 

Huh yeah?  

I’m still in my room, why?  

 

 

Incoming call – João Almeida

 

 

Hey, what’s going on?  

 

Tadej knows  

 

He knows- Oh.

 

Yeah.  

 

How?  

 

I can’t tell for sure. He connected the dots, I guess.  

 

Okay. Okay that’s. Not good. Did he tell Jonas?  

 

No. That’s the thing, he... I don’t think he’s going to tell him.  

 

What do you mean?  

 

I think he’s just going to stop answering him. Maybe block him.  

 

What? No! No, he can’t do that. Did you try to explain?  

 

Well, first of all, this is not my place. But yeah, I tried. He just texted me, telling me he knew. That he needed one more conversation with Jonas before letting go, basically. I think they called each other. He called me around 10 pm. He just cried and eventually fell asleep.  

 

Oh my- Fuck. This is... I mean, I expected him to be upset, of course, but...  

 

He thinks Jonas just wanted to have a good laugh.   

 

This is so far from the truth, Jonas would never do something like that. There is no amount of evil in this guy.   

 

I know! But Tadej doesn’t.  

 

They need to see each other. Talk to each other.  

 

I don’t think it’s the right time. Tadej is too... He needs to breathe for a moment. And Jonas is still fighting for the win.  

 

He’ll go crazy if Tadej just stop answering his texts from nowhere.  

 

You need to tell him.  

 

What? No! No, I can’t.  

 

Just tell him Tadej knows. That he needs some time for himself.  

 

You don’t even know that. Maybe he won’t speak to him ever again.  

 

Maybe. But I don’t think it’s the right thing to say to a guy who’s about to defend his title as a Tour de France winner.  

 

No, it’s not. Fuck, I hate this. I hate this so much. It’s going to ruin him.  

 

I know. But Tadej is no better and he has the right to feel this way.  

 

Yeah, of course. I’m not blaming Tadej. But fuck, I can’t blame Jonas either. Not when I’m about to break his heart.  

 

Hey, maybe there’s still hope. We’ll have to wait for the end of the Tour. It’ll be easier.  

 

You think so?  

 

I’m trying my best to stay optimistic. There’s still something to be saved, here.  

 

Yeah... Look, I’ll tell him tonight. He’ll have time to process it. I can’t do it right now.  

 

No, I get it. I’ll try to talk to Tadej.  

 

Okay. Thank you for letting me know.  

 

Your guy is head over heels for Tadej. And I’m not gonna lie, I’m rooting for them.  

 

Yeah, I do too. Those two stupid fucks. They’re worse than my kids.  

 

Yeah, I bet.   

 

Good luck for today. We’ll keep each other posted, okay?  

 

Yeah. Good luck to you too.  

 

 

10:42 am  

 

 

João 🤙

Did you sleep well?  

 

Tadeja  

no  

 

Listen, I know it looks really bad, but I promise the truth is far from what you think  

 

no, don’t  

i don’t wanna hear anything about it, okay?

i’ll block you  

 

Okay, that’s fair  

I just wanted to say that I was sorry for not telling you the truth when I found out. I could come up with hundreds of explanations but it doesn’t matter because I’m your friend and I should have told you. I understand if you don’t want to talk about it. Or talk about anything else with me. I’ll be here when you’re ready. As always.  

 

kay, noted  

don’t crash today  

 

Yep, I’ll do my best  

 

 

11:23 am  

 

 

Wout 

Dude  

Stop looking at him like that  

 

Matteo  

Sorry sorry  

He’s going to be so sad  

 

God, I know  

How am I supposed to tell him?  

 

There’s no good way, I guess  

Do you want me to do it?  

 

No, it’s okay  

Thanks though  

 

Do you think it’ll impact the way he rides the final sages?  

 

I’m not sure  

He’s usually good at compartmentalizing things   

And using negatives emotions as a fuel  

 

To be honest, I’m more worried about how his own results could affect him and his mental state  

I don’t really care about the rest  

Sorry, that’s not what a professional cyclist should say  

 

No, but that’s what a good friend and a good teammate should say  

He’ll need us in every way possible  

That means giving everything on the road and be there at the finish line to collect what’s left  

 

Yeah  

I wasn’t expecting that three weeks ago  

 

That’s the beauty of a Grand Tour  

You never know what’s going to happen  

But you know you won’t be the same when it’s over  

 

What a poet you are, Wout  

 

🖕

 

 

07:45 pm  

 

 

Jonas  

Hey  

Did you have a good day? It was a pretty nice stage  

 

 

08:15 pm  

 

 

Is everything okay?  

 

 

08:56 pm  

 

 

I hope you’re alright, call me if you need anything  

 

 

09:15 pm  

 

 

Woutje 

Hey  

Can you come to my room?  

 

Jonas 

Why?  

 

I need to talk to you  

 

Texting is fine  

And I’m not sure my legs can carry me anymore  

Also Tadej is not answering my texts and I’m getting a bit worried  

 

Yeah, that’s what I wanted to talk to you about  

 

What? Tadej?  

 

Yes  

Are you sure you don’t wanna come?  

 

I’m fine where I am  

What’s going on?  

 

Okay, here we go I guess

He knows the truth  

 

What?  

 

He knows you’re Jonas Vingegaard  

João told me  

He didn’t say anything, of course  

He thinks Tadej has found out on his own  

 

Oh  

Are you sure?  

 

Yes  

From what João knows, Tadej doesn’t want to talk to you for now  

He thinks you made fun of him. João tried to reason him but it’s a bit too soon  

It’s best if you just let him process everything for the next few days  

 

Okay  

 

Okay?  

That’s it?  

 

I think I’m gonna go to bed  

 

Jonas, talk to me  

Can I come see you?  

 

No, I’d rather sleep  

Thank you for telling me  

 

Jonas  

Don’t keep everything to yourself  

You can be angry at me if you want to  

Jonas?  

 

Incoming call - Woutje 

 

Missed call – Woutje 

 

 

Knock on my door if you need me  

 

 

09:43 pm  

 

 

Vita 💖

hi loser  

 

Tamau 👦  

hey you  

 

how is the Tour? as amazing as on tv?  

 

it’s better  

it’s so special  

how is everyone at home?  

 

good, everyone’s obsessed with the race, obviously  

did you meet some cool people?  

 

yeah, everyone’s been really nice  

it’s like a giant summer camp  

 

does it mean you’re going to stay there forever and never come back? 🙌

 

u wish 😘

 

mom misses you  

 

i miss her too  

i’ll come see you after the olympics  

 

okay mister superstar  

 

stop it 🙄🙄

 

so everything’s good?  

 

yeah, of course, everything’s great  

 

okay, enough bullshit  

tell what happened with that danish motherfucker  

 

what the fuck???

how do u know about that?  

 

that’s not the point  

come on, tell me  

 

fucking João 

there’s nothing to tell  

 

tadej  

 

nope, don’t try  

 

tadej pogačar  

 

vita, stop that  

 

you know i won’t  

a guy broke my brother’s heart, i need to know everything  

 

my heart is not broken  

 

fine  

you’re in the denial stage  

it’s perfectly normal  

 

oh my god you’re the worst  

 

it’s okay, we’ll talk about it when you’re ready  

 

it’s not  

fuck  

it’s not that deep, okay?  

it didn’t mean anything anyway so  

no point talking about it  

 

it meant something for you  

look, I don’t have all the details  

but it seems like it was a pretty big deal  

 

so you know?  

about me texting the wrong number and ending up talking with jonas vingegaard?  

 

yes  

 

and him lying about who he is for weeks?  

 

yes  

 

okay  

so you know it wasn’t real  

end of the story  

 

that’s not how it works  

why do you think he kept answering you? calling you?  

 

that’s the thing, idk why he did that  

probably because he was bored and needed some entertainment  

 

jonas vingegaard, bored?  

don’t you think he had every reason to completely ignore you?  

the guy doesn’t have a minute to himself during the Tour  

and you called each other multiple times  

 

yeah well, i don’t know  

i don’t fucking know why he did that  

 

maybe because he likes you

joão told me it was kind of obvious at this point

 

if he really liked me, he would not have lied  

you don’t lie to people you care about  

 

okay, that was a shitty move and he shouldn’t have done that  

but maybe he had a good reason to lie  

 

like what?  

 

he’s a famous athlete, a Tour winner  

his name will forever be remembered in the cycling world  

he probably has to deal with crazy fans everyday  

he has to protect himself, for his own safety  

 

but i'm not just some crazy fan!  

 

he didn’t know that when he met you!  

 

he had so many opportunities  

on the phone  

we even met twice during the Tour  

and he didn’t say anything  

 

maybe he tried  

did you talk to him? since you discovered the truth?  

 

we called last night  

i didn’t tell him about me finding out though  

i just wanted to talk to him one more time  

 

how was it?  

 

nice

i love his voice

and his laugh

and how he never questions anything i say like, he just rolls with it? like he just gets me, you know?

he told me about these stupid fun facts and i’m not even surprised he knows about them in the first place, he’s such a nerd  

 

wow, okay  

and you decided to throw that away because...  

 

because he lied to me!  

he played this character and now i don’t know who he is anymore

i don’t know what’s real or not  

 

hm  

maybe you should just talk to him about it?  

 

hell no  

i feel so dumb  

and used and fucking humiliated  

why are you on his side?  

i’m your brother  

everyone just acts like I’m being dramatic and i’m sick of it  

i’m sad and hurt and i want to hate him, ok?  

 

okay, i'm sorry

i’ll always be on your side tadeja

we can hate him together, alright?  

 

yeah, okay  

 

do you want me to punch him in the face?  

 

that would be very mean  

please do it  

 

lmao  

i’m not sure it would make you feel any better  

 

probably not  

 

try to enjoy the final stages, okay?  

you’ve dreamed about it for so long  

 

in my dreams i was riding a bike and wearing the yellow jersey  

 

i know  

you would have crushed them all  

 

i would have met Jonas as a rival  

it’s so weird to think about it that way  

 

maybe you were always supposed to meet each other  

no matter how  

 

do you really believe in those things?  

 

it’s a nice thought, don’t you think?  

 

i don’t know  

maybe  

 

hey, it’s gonna be alright  

try to clear your mind  

i allow you to wallow in self-pity for a bit but don’t make it last too long, okay?  

spend some time with friends  

party hard in Nice  

 

are you telling me to forget about my problems by drinking alcohol and hooking up with random people?  

 

i never said that!  

but you’re young, you deserve to have some fun  

then you’ll have a clearer mind and you’ll know what to do with your bike seller  

 

he’s not a bike seller  

 

but that’s not really important, right?  

what he does for a living  

the thing is that he made you smile and laugh and cry and nobody had made you feel so many emotions since the crash  

you kind of hid behind a wall of smiles and nonchalance but you never allowed anyone to get too close to you  

and i know you’re scared of getting hurt but tadej, you survived so much worse

what’s the point of living if you’re not going to take any risks?  

but no matter what you decide to do, just know that i’ll always love you, okay?  

 

i love you too  

so much  

i don’t say it enough  

you were the only one treating me normally after the crash and not like a fragile little thing  

and i know mom and dad did their best, they were just worried but you know  

sometimes i feel like i’m still in that hospital bed trying not to die

like i have to be extra careful about everything, like i might break at any minor inconvenience  

 

but you’re not going to break  

and you’re not in the hospital anymore  

you have so many things to live and so many people to love  

and maybe you and jonas are going to live something incredible, and maybe not  

maybe you’ll fall in love and maybe you’ll have your heart broken  

it’s part of the game  

 

i already did  

 

what?  

 

i already fell in love  

it’s so fucking scary  

 

i know, love  

but it's the most beautiful thing in the world, too

and you’ll be okay, i promise

 

i’ll come see you after Paris

i'll spend a few weeks at home

 

okay, can't wait to see you tamau

text me anytime  

 

yeah

thank you vi 

i love you  

 

i love you too, dumbass  

 

❤️❤️

 

🫶

 

 

Notes:

(Vita is actually one of Tadej's sisters in real life too. Just pretend they're texting each other in slovenian lol)

Chapter 11: to lose

Notes:

HEY

We're still riding this emotional wave people, but we'll be okay, I promise!
There will be 4 more chapters after this one. I can't wait for you to read them.

Hope you'll enjoy this one, thank you again for your amazing, hilarious and really nice comments <3

19th of July, 2024 

 

08:45 am  

 

 

Matteo 

So  

Did he cry a lot?  

 

Wout 

No  

Well I don’t really know  

It was so weird  

He was not in a great mood in the first place, didn’t want me to come to his room  

So I texted him  

He just said “okay” then went to bed  

 

Wtf  

 

Yeah  

I’m not buying it though  

We’ll see how he is during breakfast   

But it’s a big stage today so we should let him breathe, okay?  

 

Yeah of course  

 

 

10:35 am  

 

 

Matteo 

Okay, what was that?  

 

Wout  

Dude  

I don’t know  

   

I mean, his eyes are a bit glassy and I don’t think he had a great night of sleep but  

He looks fine  

Like  

Laughed at Chris’ awful jokes and everything  

   

Because he’s really bad at dealing with feelings  

He just puts them in a box and ignores them until he can’t anymore  

 

Maybe it’s the best thing he can do, for now?  

Not really healthy but  

There are still 3 stages left  

 

Yeah  

I still don’t like it  

It’s like he’s carrying a bomb that could explode at any moment  

I don’t think he’ll be able to hold it for a long time  

 

Well  

I guess we’ll just have to wait and see  

How is Tadej?  

 

Last time I checked, he wasn’t talking to João either  

I think he’s trying to avoid his feelings too  

 

Great  

That’s the perfect recipe for disaster  

 

We’ll have to do something eventually  

They can’t just move on and never talk again, right?  

 

I mean  

They can 🤷

But that would be such a waste  

Did you see how they looked at each other the other day?  

Tadej didn’t even know Jonas was his Jonas but  

It was kind of intense  

 

Yeah I know  

You should have seen Jonas on that press conference day  

He was mesmerized   

I’ve never seen him blush like that  

 

God they can’t just walk away from each other  

 

Didn’t know you were a hopeless romantic 😏

 

Stop it, you’re exactly the same  

You want to see them together  

 

I know  

Sarah is entirely invested too now  

 

That’s cute  

We better be mentioned during their wedding’s speech   

 

We'll be the fucking best men at this point 🙄🙄

Anyway, let’s focus on the stage  

 

Yes sir 🫡

 

 

06:48 pm  

 

 

Sarah ❤️

How is he?  

That was brutal...  

 

Wout 👨‍👩‍👦‍👦

Not well  

Stayed in Matteo’s arms for ages after the end of the stage  

Now I think he’s pretending to sleep on the bus so that no one talks to him  

 

Poor thing  

What about Matteo?  

 

Gutted  

But he’s okay  

 

And you?  

 

I don’t know  

I feel bad for Jonas, I know how much the Tour means to him  

But we knew it would be almost impossible to win this year  

 

He gave eveything he had, that’s the most important thing  

 

I know, but I don’t think he really cares about it at the moment  

I just hope he doesn’t blame himself for it  

 

You know him, he probably will  

But he’ll be okay  

What about that thing with the photographer?  

 

God, it’s an ugly mess  

It would be so much easier if it was just a “thing”  

 

He’s not dealing well with his emotions, is he?  

 

Not really  

I think I’ll let him be tonight, he probably needs some time alone  

Then it’s only two stages and he can go home for a bit  

 

He should come with us to Paris  

The kids would be so happy  

And his next race is not until the 12 th    

 

I’m not sure he’ll be up for it but I’ll ask  

And how do you know so much about his race schedule?  

 

Wout, we’ve been together for years   

I always know everything  

And Jonas is part of the family  

 

He is  

I’ll let you know about Paris  

FT with the kids tonight?

 

Yes, that woud be great

Georges was so sad when he saw Jonas on TV

 

I'll try to cheer him up

I love you ❤️

 

I love you too ❤️

 

 

08:36 pm  

 

 

João Almeida

Hey  

How is he doing?  

 

Wout van Aert 

Hey, thank you for asking  

I don’t know  

He doesn’t show anything  

He looks upset, obviously, but that’s it  

I think I’d be less worried if he just cried or got angry  

But there’s nothing  

 

I mean, it’s a lot  

His relationship with Tadej  

Knowing he won’t win the Tour this year   

Having to deal with shitty media asking shitty questions   

It’s easier to shut down everything then having to face all of those things  

 

But he won’t talk about it!  

We’ve been friends for years  

I mean, I would gladly take the pain and the pressure so he doesn’t have to deal with it  

 

I know you want to be here for him, because you’re a good friend  

But you can’t fight his battles   

 

Yeah  

It fucking sucks  

What about Tadej?  

 

I saw him at the end of the stage   

He was watching Jonas from afar  

He wasn’t even taking any pictures  

I know one of his sisters texted him last night but that’s it  

 

Okay  

Maybe they both need some time  

It was pretty intense from day 1 and now they feel like everything just fell apart  

 

How much time do we give them before we intervene?  

 

Idk  

I’m gonna ask Jonas if he wants to come to Paris with us  

 

Tadej is going too  

 

Really??  

 

Yeah, he’s leaving on Wednesday I think  

 

This is perfect!!  

 

How is this perfect?  

 

Okay, I’ll tell you about it later but I think I have a plan  

If they don’t get their shit together in the meantime, of course  

 

It would be a miracle if they did  

Keep me posted on that plan, okay?  

 

Yeah I will  

 

 

09:10 pm  

 

 

Tadeja 

just so u know  

i’m still upset about that whole thing  

but  

do you know if he’s alright?  

 

João 🤙

You know you can ask him, right?  

 

no  

please, do u know something?  

you owe me one  

 

You won’t be able to use that against me forever  

 

i know, that’s why i’m trying to make the most out of it  

 

You’re insufferable  

The thing is I don’t know  

Not even his teammates know, so  

 

wdym??  

 

He’s not showing anything  

He just isolates himself  

 

oh  

 

Yeah  

 

fuck  

i’m mad at him but  

it was so heartbreaking to watch  

 

He’s not a bad guy, you know?  

He’s actually a good person  

 

he’s a liar, too  

 

I never said he was perfect  

Do you think you are?  

 

obviously not  

 

And I’m not sure the only reason you’re mad is because he lied  

 

really?  

please, enlighten me with ur opinion  

 

I think you feel ashamed and that’s why you decided to dig a hole to hide in it  

I think you’re upset because you thought following the Tour would be this extraordinary experience, and it is, but it also reminds you of everything you lost  

And I think you’re mad at him because you love him but at the same time you can’t help but envy him because he’s living the life you wanted  

 

well

that would make a bitter person, no?  

 

That would make you a human being  

And that’s okay  

 

but i hate it  

i hate this person you just described  

this isn’t me  

 

Your emotions don’t define you, Tadej  

Only your choices  

 

isn’t it a quote from harry potter?  

 

Dumbledore was a wise man  

I'm doing my best, alright?

 

he sure was  

i just think i need this tour to be over  

it’s just too much right now  

 

Yeah, I get it  

 

i still care about him  

so much  

in a way that scares the shit out of me  

it’s just  

him being him  

it complicates things  

 

I know  

But complicated doesn’t mean impossible  

 

i guess  

anyway, i should prepare for tomorrow’s stage  

and you should sleep  

 

Yep  

Tadej?  

 

yeah?  

 

For me, you’re still the best cyclist in the world  

Always will be  

 

and you’ll always be my favorite almost-teammate

(don't say that to adam)

 

I won't

🫶

 

❤️

 

 

09:34 pm  

 

 

Incoming call – Mor ❤️

 

 

Jonas 

Mom?  

 

Hello honey. Are you busy?  

 

No, no. I was just resting. I’m sorry I didn’t call sooner, things have been... A bit chaotic.  

 

It’s alright, don’t worry about that. How are you feeling?  

 

I’m fine.  

 

Jonas...  

 

Mom, I can’t do this. I can’t...   

 

It’s okay to feel sad, you know.  

 

I know. But right now I... If I tell you about how I really feel, then... I’ll probably cry. And then I won’t be able to stop crying. And I’ll think about how fucked up I am and I'll refuse to ride the remaining stages and I can’t... I have to finish it.  

 

Okay love, okay. It’s okay. You don’t have to talk about it.  

 

Thank you. I feel like that’s what everyone expects me to do, right now. Like they’re waiting for me to completely break.  

 

People who care about you are simply worried.   

 

I know. But I’m worried too. I’m so, so scared, mom.  

 

What are you afraid of, honey?  

 

Losing. I know it’s already done, but... Yeah. Losing the team’s trust. Losing the title. Losing Tadej-  

 

Who’s Tadej?  

 

He’s- It doesn’t matter. I just... Yeah. I’m tired. Exhausted. And terrified.  

 

Do you remember the first time you learned how to ride a bike?  

 

Huh... I’m not sure. I was quite young, I think.  

 

You were five. You were so small, trying to ride your cousin’s bike that was way too big for you.  

 

It was a green bike.  

 

Yes, it was. You fell, a lot. At one point, you were so frustrated that you decided you would never ride a bike again. That you were too scared for it.  

 

Guess I was wrong.  

 

You were. Because the next day, at the crack of dawn, you were trying again. And again. Until you got it right. You knees were red and you had hurt your palms so many times. But your smile was so bright.   

 

Is it a trick to make sure I finish the Tour?  

 

No, it’s not. Because I already know you’ll finish it. And you know it. It’s just a reminder that when you fall, you always get back up. That’s what you did, three months ago. And trust me, I was scared too. I’m scared everytime I see you on TV, in a descent, on a tight corner. But that’s what you are, my little Jonas. Lose or win, it’s in your bones, no matter how much you break them.  

 

I think about it all the time, you know? The crash. I felt sorry for myself for so long. But then I met someone, who had it way worse, and who had to say goodbye to cycling because of it. But do you know what he did?  

 

No?  

 

He found something else. He found joy in other things and now he’s making people happy by capturing beautiful moments with his camera. He fell and he got back up in a way that many people would have not. I’d like to think I’ll finish this Tour for me but I know I’ll do it for him too.  

 

Oh, baby, that’s... He seems like a wonderful person.  

 

He is.  

 

I’m glad you’re surrounded by people who care about you. You deserve all the support and the love in the world. You know that, right?  

 

I’m not sure, mom, I’m-I’m not perfect, you know.  

 

Of course not. Who is? We’re all just doing the best we can.   

 

Hm, maybe.  

 

I’ll let you rest, okay? We’re so proud of you, Jonas. So, so proud.   

 

Thank you, mom.   

 

You’re allowed to feel things. Sadness, fear, disappointment. But do you know the good thing about these emotions?  

 

No?  

 

They never last. Soon, you’ll be filled with joy and excitement again. And you’ll know, at that moment, how important it is to cherish those moments.  

 

How are you so wise?  

 

It’s because I’m old, honey.  

 

You’re not old!   

 

You’re too sweet. Go to sleep, baby. We’ll cheer for you tomorrow, as always.  

 

I love you. I love you all so much.  

 

We love you too, darling. Take care.  

 

Yeah. Bye.  

 

 

Call ended – 28 minutes 39 seconds. 

 

 

Chapter 12: to let go

Notes:

Hi beautiful people!

So sorry for the lack of update, it's been a crazy week at work! I just ride my bike - go to work - sleep and repeat.
We're close to the finish line though! How do we feel about this??

Anyway, hope you have a beautiful rest of your day or evening! I'll try to add one more chapter by the end of the week-end <3

20th of July, 2024 

 

09:02am  

 

 

Woutje 

Hey little one  

How did you sleep?  

 

Jonas 

Not great  

I miss my bed at home  

 

Yeah, me too  

 

Listen, I know you’re worried   

But I’ll be fine  

 

I know you’ll be  

Doesn’t mean I can’t look after you   

 

Thank you, really  

And I’m sorry  

I know the guys are watching me like I’m going to burst into tears at any moment  

I just think I need to go through this by myself  

You’ve already done a lot for me  

 

You know I don’t keep scores, right?  

I’ll always be there  

It was actually written in your contract back in 2019, didn’t you see it?  

 

Oh, really?  

I knew I should have read it  

 

Too bad  

You’re stuck with me now 🤷

Oh, by the way  

You’re coming to Paris with us  

 

What?  

 

It was a special request   

 

From who?  

 

My wife  

And kids  

 

Wout  

You can’t use Sarah and the kids to coax me into going to Paris with you 🙄

 

Yes I can  

So?  

 

I can’t!  

You forget about the Tour of Poland  

 

It’s on the 12 th !  

And we both know you won’t need to train that hard for this one  

Plenty of time to enjoy watching me suffer at the Olympics  

It’s gonna be crazy, I want you to be there  

Please please please  

 

Wout, I don’t know...  

 

Please  

Please  

Please  

 

Oh my god, stop it!  

 

Not until you say yes  

 

That’s very low  

And very childish

 

Please  

Please  

Please  

 

Okay, fine!  

I’ll come  

 

Yessss  

 

You’re so annoying  

 

🥰🥰🥰

 

 

09:14 am  

 

 

Jonas 

Hey Matt  

Sorry about yesterday, it was a tough day and I didn’t take the time to thank you  

You’ve been amazing, since day one  

 

Matteo

Hey, no worries, you don’t need to apologize  

I wish I could have won it for you guys  

I really thought I could do it  

 

Yeah, I know  

But what you did out there was incredible  

You have nothing to regret  

 

Thank you, it means a lot coming from you  

You feel ready for today?  

 

Not really lol  

We’ll see how the legs are  

I just hope Remco is as tired as I am  

 

He probably is  

We all are  

I don’t know how I’m supposed to race for the fucking Olympics in two weeks  

 

You’ll do great  

I’ll be there to scream your name on the side of the road  

 

Wait, what?  

You’re coming to Paris?  

 

Yep  

Wout basically forced me to but  

I guess it’s going to be fun  

 

Oh my god yes!!  

It’s going to be EPIC  

 

Wow, that much enthusiasm?  

 

Always!  

 

Lol  

I'm glad you were here this year  

You made things easier  

 

Anything for my captain  

 

Oh god, don’t call me that  

 

🫡🫡

 

 

10:45 am  

 

 

Alek Javornik

Hey Tadej, what’s up?  

 

Tadej Pogačar

hi alek  

still riding the emotions of the tour, and it’s not even finished yet lol  

 

I know right??  

It’s been crazy  

And we’re gonna be first row tomorrow night to listen to our national anthem  

 

yeah, this is quite special  

are you going back to slovenia after this?  

 

Yep, have to meet with Maj and Iva, they want to publish a special issue for the end of the month  

Actually, I wanted to ask you something  

 

okay?  

 

Would you be okay with me interviewing you?  

 

interviewing me?  

why?  

 

You’re kind of a national treasure, now  

Everyone is obsessed with your photographs  

People want to know more about you  

I talked to Maj about it, he thinks it’s a great idea  

 

i don’t think it would be that interesting?  

i mean, i’m just a photographer  

 

No you’re not  

You’re one of a kind  

You have this way of seeing things and you manage to share that through your lens  

It’s kind of amazing  

 

thank you, that means a lot  

 

So, what do you say?  

 

i mean  

sure, why not  

 

Great!!  

I thought about doing it on Sunday night, after the podium?  

It won’t be long, don’t worry, you’ll have plenty of time to party  

 

lol, that’s fine, i think i’m gonna head home early  

i really need some rest  

 

Yeah, me too, it’s been exhausting  

We can meet at my hotel around 8:45 pm?  

I’ll send you the location  

 

yeah, sounds good  

 

Thank you so much for doing this!!  

 

no problem 😉  

 

 

06:27 pm  

 

 

Tamau 👦 

am i a bad person if i say I’m disappointed?  

 

Vita 💖

why would you be a bad person?  

 

because primož won the stage and he’s slovenian and i should be fucking happy about how the tour went for him  

 

but you’re not happy  

 

idk  

i really thought jonas could win this one  

did you see how he shook his head when primož started sprinting?  

like he was giving up  

 

giving up?  

that’s a bit harsh  

 

he could have tried  

go for the sprint  

fight a bit more for the win  

 

okay, you need to stop talking  

 

what?  

 

he’s coming back from a big crash  

nobody thought he could be here today  

and he’s still second in the gc  

 

yeah well  

he's been on a defensive strategy for three weeks  

he didn’t take any risks  

what's the point of coming to the tour if you're just going to watch your opponents fly in front of you?  

 

oh, i see  

you’re on the second stage  

 

what are u talking about  

 

the grief stages  

1 : shock and denial  

2 : anger  

you're clearly angry right now  

 

i’m not angry  

 

you are  

you’re angry at him because you think he didn’t fight  

for the win, for you  

 

you’re not a psychologist vita  

this is so stupid  

 

right  

the thing is jonas has done his best with what he had  

and it’s not perfect, it’s not a win, but it’s enough  

you can be mad at him for the lying thing but don’t try to come at him on his performance because that’s just rude and very low  

 

 

07:30pm  

 

 

i'm sorry  

you’re right, i’m angry  

i don’t know about what anymore to be honest  

 

it’s fine  

you’re tired and frustrated  

 

but that was mean  

 

it was  

 

i know he did his best  

and I know he’s so strong for showing up and trying  

and he’s still better than 98% of the peloton  

 

he is  

mom grew quite fond of him over the past three weeks  

 

yeah  

me too  

 

so, what are you going to do about it?  

 

about what?  

 

the tour is over tomorrow  

are you going to call him?  

 

i don’t know  

i really don’t know  

what should i do?  

 

no, don’t ask me  

it’s your life, your choices  

 

but i know you have an opinion  

give it to me  

 

tadeja, you know what i think  

just listen to your gut  

 

that’s a shitty advice  

maybe i could wait a bit longer  

idk  

i'm scared  

and confused  

 

 

just calm down  

 

or i can just ignore it for the rest of my life  

sounds like a plan  

 

there it is  

 

what?  

 

the third stage  

 

oh god  

what’s the third stage?  

 

bargaining  

“the hope that the individual can avoid a cause of grief”  

 

i’m not trying to avoid it  

 

😑😑

 

yeah okay  

maybe  

great  

i was already a dickhead and now i’m a coward  

 

you’re not, stop it  

what are you afraid of?  

 

idk  

him being different than the jonas i know?  

me being a little shit because he’s the best climber in the world and i feel like a total failure next to him?  

me ruining this fragile thing between us because i’m just a trainwreck full of trauma and people say i talk too much and laugh too loudly  

 

hey, you don’t talk too much and you don’t laugh too loudly  

you have the best stories and your laugh could light up any rooms  

you’re an amazing guy Tadej  

anyone would be lucky to be with you  

 

you’re saying this because you’re my sister  

 

wrong  

i’m your sister so it’s my job to tell you the harsh truth  

 

what is the last stage?  

of the grief thing  

 

i’m not going to tell you because it’s not grief  

it’s the beginning of something  

you just have to take a leap of faith  

 

you actually give good advice  

 

i know  

 

thank you  

for everything  

you're the best  

 

i want to know everything, okay?  

keep me posted  

 

i will  

i love you  

 

love you too  

 

 

09:34 pm  

 

 

Jonas 

I lost the Tour  

 

Woutje 

It’s not over yet, anything could happen tomorrow  

 

The only thing that would lead me to the victory would be Primož’ crashing and I’m not going to wish for that to happen  

Let’s face it  

I lost  

 

Probably  

 

You’re not going to give me the “but second place is still incredible” talk?  

 

Is that what you want to hear?  

 

No  

 

You know what I think  

I think you’ve been amazing  

You went beyond what we could have imagined and I’m proud of you  

But yeah, you lost the Tour  

 

I lost the Tour  

Fuck  

I was wrong  

I can’t do this alone  

I lost  

I feel miserable and sad and l want to scream  

 

Hey, do you want me to come over?  

 

No  

I don’t know  

That fucking crash  

It ruined everything  

 

I know  

 

It’s not fair  

 

No, it’s not  

 

The Tour, it’s my thing  

It’s the only thing I can get  

The only thing I allow myself to want  

And I know I sound like a child but  

It hurts so fucking much  

 

I’m so sorry Jonas  

 

Don’t be  

God, I shouldn’t be complaining right now  

You crashed too  

And Tadej too and he almost died and he’s not crying like a fucking loser over a second place  

 

It’s not because other people are going through things that you’re not allowed to be hurt  

There’s no hierarchy in pain  

We all feel it

 

I don’t want to feel it  

 

I know  

But you’ll see the end of it, eventually  

It won’t hurt that much in a few weeks, a few months  

Then you’ll set yourself new goals and you’ll carry on  

 

I don’t know how I’m supposed to do that  

 

Your body knows, you’ll see  

 

How are you so sure about that?  

 

Because I went through this so many times  

It makes you stronger, fiercer  

Because you know the risks, you know the stakes  

A risky turn, a tricky descent  

Everything could be over in a blink of an eye  

So you get back up, you hop on your bike and you ride until your legs feel like concrete and your lungs are about to explode because it’s what we do best  

We’re cyclists  

We like the suffering and the challenges and the fact that there’s only a tiny little chance of succeeding  

Because the moment we finally win...  

 

It’s the best feeling in the world  

 

Exactly  

You know why you do it  

There’s only one day left  

Let’s make this one count, okay?  

For those who can’t fight anymore  

 

Okay, yeah  

I’ll give everything  

I promise  

 

I know you will little one  

 

 

10:08 pm  

 

 

Jonas 

I know I should probably apologize first, and explain myself, and I will. I promise I will, if you give me the chance to. But for now, I just want to thank you.  

I know I lost the Tour today. And I think a part of me wanted to give up. Just pack my things and go home. Because it’s everything I work for, all year long, and what’s the point of being here if I’m not winning the damn race?  

But there’s a point, actually. I get the chance to pin the number “1” on my back every day. I get to ride a bike thousands of people would dream to have in their garage. I’m surrounded by amazing, talented and devoted teammates. I’m receiving the love of hundreds of people, waiting for me on the side of the road, children waving their hats and bidons for me to sign.  

I get to be here, to be part of the best professional team, in the biggest race of the world. And maybe it’s because I won it twice, or maybe it’s because I’ve become sullen since the crash. But it’s like I had lost that spark, that excitement that comes with the Tour.  

But you brought it back. You and your enthusiasm and your beautiful photographs and your laugh and your love for this sport. You brought me back to life and maybe I ruined everything, but for the first time in months, I felt like myself again and I’ll never be able to thank you enough for that.  

You’re a treasure for this world, Tadej. I’m going to finish this Tour and I'll fight as hard as I can and when I’ll cross the line, I’ll think of you.

 

Chapter 13: to fight

Notes:

Hellooooo

Work has been kicking my butt lately and sometimes I feel like giving up everything and go live in the mountains or something
ANYWAY, we're close to the end, aaaaaaah! Time flies by when we're having fun hehe

Thank you again for the love you showed this little silly fic, it means the world <3

21st of July, 2024 

 

08:04 am 

 

 

Maj Rožman 

Hello Tadej! I don’t know if you are awake yet, can you call me when you see this text? Thank you! 

 

 

09:11 am 

 

 

Outgoing call - Maj Rožman 

 

 

Maj Rožman 

Hello Tadej! 

 

Tadej Pogačar 

Hello Maj, how are you? Is everything okay? 

 

Yeah, everything is fine, sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. So, last day of the Tour! 

 

Yeah, I know. It passed by in a blur. 

 

For us too, I’m not gonna lie. Everyone is buzzing with excitement. Another Slovenian win! 

 

Yeah, Primož has been amazing. It was a nice fight. 

 

For sure! Vingegaard was really strong, too. A brave one, that guy! 

 

Yeah. Very brave. 

 

Anyway, I just wanted to check if everything was ready for your flight tomorrow. 

 

Tomorrow? 

 

Yes, to Paris? 

 

Huh, I thought I was supposed to fly there on Wednesday? 

 

Oh, really? Well, I emailed you your ticket. Your plane takes off at 08:45 in the morning. I’m sorry, is it a problem for you? 

 

No, no. It’s okay. I’ll have time to pack tonight. 

 

Are you sure? I know it’s been such a crazy month, I don’t want you to feel too overwhelmed. 

 

Yes, I’m sure. I’m really excited about Paris, so. Thank you though. 

 

No problem. Call me if you need anything, okay? 

 

Yeah, I will. Bye Maj. 

 

Bye Tadej, see you! 

 

 

Call ended – 10 minutes 35 seconds. 

 

 

11:03 am 

 

 

João 🤙

Oi oi 

Big party tonight 

Are you in? 

 

Tadeja

hey 

sorry, but i have an interview with alek and then i have to pack for paris 

my flight is tomorrow morning 

 

What?? 

You were supposed to leave on Wednesday 

 

i know! 

i got the information wrong, idk 

 

So you’re going home as soon as the podium ceremony is over? 

 

right after the interview, yeah

 

But 

What about Jonas? 

 

what about him? 

 

Don’t play dumb 

You were supposed to talk to each other 

 

i didn’t promise anything 

although i'm this close to drop everything and just kiss him the moment he crosses the finish line 

 

Wait what 

 

u know i’m gay, right? 

 

Of course I know you dumbass 

But you did a whole 180  

 

*Screenshot* 

this is what i received last night 

 

Fuck 

That’s the cutest shit I’ve ever read 

Just marry him already 

 

i thought you didn’t like him 

 

I always said he was a nice guy 

Didn’t know he was such a romantic 

 

there’s no point in talking tonight though 

the stage, the podiums 

then he’ll have to deal with plenty of media 

and then i'll have to deal with the aftermath of the tour and it's a fucking lot

 

Fuck you’re right 

But it’s not impossible...

 

i don’t want our first real conversation to be at the corner of his team bus trying to hide from the journalists 

or in a shitty hotel lobby 

 

Yeah, I get it 

But that means you’re open for something, right? 

 

i don’t know 

my mind is still a mess and i’m just full of emotions 

but i'll text him, okay? 

he deserves an answer 

 

Okay, good 

 

oh, also 

you’re fourth 

and yatesy sixth 

you fucking legends 

 

Haha, I knowww 

So crazy 

 

i’ll scream extra loud for you 

 

Tadeja 

Are you flirting with me 

😏😏

 

u wish 

😘

 

 

11:34 am 

 

 

Woutje 

Are you still in your room 

 

Jonas 

I’m trying to meditate 

 

Wtf 

Since when do you do that 

 

Since right now 

And I hate it 

 

Well yeah, it’s awful 

Are you feeling anxious? 

 

Not really 

There’s still a risk I lose the second place but 

As long as I’m doing my best 

 

That’s a good mindset  

I’m really proud 

 

You can take the praise on that one 

Well, you and Tadej 

 

I’m not following? 

 

Never mind, it doesn’t matter 

You’re starting at 5, right? 

 

5:03 

I’ll be showered and ready to watch when you’ll go 

Then it’ll be done 

 

When are you leaving for Paris? 

 

I have to be there on Wednesday to do some media stuff then recon  

Sarah and the kids will be there on Friday though 

The opening ceremony is going to be epic  

 

Yeah, for sure 

Wait, I don’t have a hotel room 

Everything must be fully booked now 

 

Don’t worry about it 

Just make sure you’re in Paris by Friday 

 

You sound like a mafia boss or something 

 

Maybe I am 

😎

 

🙄

 

Do you think you'll talk to Tadej tonight?

 

I texted him last night 

He didn’t answer 

 

Oh 

Well, maybe he needs a bit more time? 

 

I can’t force him 

If he doesn’t want to talk to me, I have to accept it 

Anyway, I’m heading downstairs 

See you there 

 

Yeah, okay 

 

 

12:04 pm 

 

 

Wout van Aert 

Okay, they need to talk tonight 

 

João Almeida

They can’t! 

Tadej is leaving early tomorrow morning for Paris 

And he has this interview thing tonight 

 

Fuck 

Jonas will be in Paris on Friday  

 

Tadej will be super busy  

I don’t know if they’ll be able to meet properly 

He's still debating on what to do  

 

Did you know Jonas texted him? 

 

Yeah, Tadej sent me the screenshot 

I must admit I almost cried reading it 

 

They’re driving me insane 

 

But you had a plan, right? 

 

Yeah, but I’ll need some help 

 

Tell me what to do 

 

Okay, you sure? 

Because you’ll have to gather quite a lot of information for me 

 

I’m your guy 

 

Great 

First, I need someone from your team who knows Tadej enough and who’ll be in Paris for the games  

 

Mikkel Bjerg, he knows Tadej pretty well 

 

That’s perfect 

And he’s Danish too 

That’s a fucking sign from the universe 

 

If you say so 

 

Then, I’ll need you to get Tadej’s schedule, like what sports is he going to cover and what hotels he’s going to stay at 

 

That’s going to be tricky 

I’ll do my best 

 

Okay, great 

That’s it for now 

I need to think some more but we’ll talk about it later, okay? 

 

Okay 

You sound like a fucking spy 

 

That’s funny, Jonas told me I sounded like a mafia boss earlier this morning 

 

This is not funny 

This is concerning 

 

Anyway 

Thank you for your help 

Good luck for the itt! 

 

Yeah, you too 

Talk later 

 

 

07:40 pm 

 

 

Far 💙

Your mom is usually better at this than I am, but she’s too emotional right now. I never doubted you, Jonas. You’re always number one for us. We’ll call tomorrow, enjoy the night with your team. I love you. 

 

 

07:52 pm 

 

 

Seppie 

Congrats champ, you made it! I don’t care what they say, you were the strongest out there. Now you can relax 

 

 

08:02 pm 

 

 

Nathan 

You’re my fucking hero. That ITT was insane. So proud of you and the team 

 

 

08:14 pm

 

 

Sarah VA

Jonas, what a performance! Thank you for these amazing three weeks, you gave your all and it showed. Lots of love from me and the kids 🫶

 

 

08:45 pm 

 

 

Woutje 

Dude, where are you 

We’re heading to the hotel for the party 

 

Jonas 

Fuck 

I’m looking for Tadej 

There are so many people  

 

Jonas, he left already 

 

What?? 

 

Yeah, I’m sorry 

I heard from João he had an interview or something 

I didn’t think you were going to try to talk to him tonight 

You said you were not going to force anything

 

I know what I said 

Where is this interview?? 

 

I don’t know! 

 

This was supposed to be it 

The Tour is over, it’s done 

And it’s like everything is coming back like a fucking tsunami and I need to see him 

 

I know 

But he’s leaving for Paris early in the morning 

 

But 

I had a plan 

Sort of 

 

Listen, it’s going to be okay 

You’re full of emotions right now and maybe you need some time to calm down 

 

I’m always full of emotions 

 

Yeah but this is different 

You just finished the Tour, you’re exhausted  

Just come back to the bus 

You need to relax and have some fun 

 

What if it was my only chance? 

 

Of course not! 

You’ll meet again 

I promise 

But tonight, it’s about you, okay? 

 

Hm 

Okay, I’ll be there in two minutes 

 

Great 

Let’s have some fuuuuuun 

 

 

09:46 pm 

 

 

Alek Javornik

Thanks for the interview man!! 

It was so awesome 

I’m actually glad that I got to know you a bit better 

 

Tadej Pogačar

it was really fun actually! 

i think i needed that lol 

 

It was my pleasure! 

Are you sure you’re not down for a few drinks 

 

nah i'm okay, i’m going to do some adult shit like laundry then head to bed 

like a responsible person you know 

 

I admire you  

Well, have fun in Paris! 

I’ll send you the article so you can check everything before it’s published 

 

okay, sounds good 

thanks again, have a safe flight home! 

 

 

 

10:02 pm 

 

 

Tadej 

*Image attached: Jonas Vingegaard riding his bike during the final ITT* 

*Image attached: Jonas Vingegaard after the finish line, helmet on the ground, body hunched over his bike* 

*Image attached: Jonas Vingegaard standing on the second step of the podium, holding his trophy, a small smile on his face* 

 

 

10:23 pm 

 

 

Jonas 

These are really beautiful. 

 

Tadej 

was it true? 

 

What? 

 

did u think about me when you crossed the finish line? 

 

I thought about you all along. 

Where are you? Can we talk? 

 

i'm actually going to bed right now 

i just wanted to congratulate you 

you were really strong 

 

Tadej 

I’m so sorry 

 

jonas, i can’t do this right now 

it didn’t feel right to not text you but  

i'm heading to paris tomorrow and then i have to go back to slovenia 

 

It’s okay 

I can wait 

 

jonas 

what’s the point anyway? 

 

The point? 

 

i mean, what do you want from me? 

to be my friend? 

 

I don’t know 

Maybe? 

I want what we had 

When we could talk for hours and everything was easy 

 

i don’t think it’s possible anymore 

 

Why? 

I don’t understand 

 

because u were supposed to be a normal guy, just like me! 

not a famous cyclist in the middle of a very successful career 

 

What’s the difference? 

I’m still me! 

I’m not a different person 

 

but you are! 

you held the most important trophy over your head on the fucking champs-elysées 

 

And so what? 

I’m still eating cereals for breakfast every morning and I’m still scared of the thunder 

It doesn’t change a fucking thing 

 

but i bet you can’t hold a guy’s hand in the street, do you? 

 

You want to hold my hand in the street? 

 

i don’t know!

yes, maybe! 

and maybe i misinterpreted the signals and i'm making a fool of myself but 

i thought we had something 

 

You didn’t misinterpret anything 

We had something 

We still have something 

Please, can we talk about this in person? 

 

idk

i’m sorry 

i’m a mess right now and it’s been a long tour and one day you’re an athlete on my tv screen and the next you’re the guy i want to talk to just before i go to sleep 

and i need to fucking breathe

 

Right, of course 

I'm not going to push 

Can I ask you something, though? 

 

yeah? 

 

When did you find out? 

 

does it really matter? 

 

Yes 

Please 

 

on the second rest day, when joão and i went to say hi to you 

you laughed about something matteo said 

something clicked

i think a part of me didn’t want to believe it 

but i ended up looking on joão’s phone one night, to compare the numbers 

 

Fuck 

I’m so sorry about the whole thing 

I wanted to tell you, so bad 

But I thought it would be easier after the Tour 

 

why did u lie in the first place? 

did you think i was some creepy fan? 

 

No 

I wasn’t doing really well, three weeks ago 

I think I needed to be Jonas 

Not Vingegaard, just Jonas 

 

do you regret answering my first text? 

 

No, never 

Do you wish you had Sara’s number right back then? 

 

no 

 

Are you going to delete my number, now? 

 

i don’t think i’d be able to, even if i wanted to 

i really have to go to sleep now 

 

Of course, sorry 

This isn’t goodbye forever, right? 

Wait, don’t tell me 

I don’t think I’d be able to cope if it was 

 

congrats again on your second place, i hope you're proud of yourself

goodnight jonas 

 

I think I am

Goodnight Tadej 

 

 

 

Chapter 14: to wait

Notes:

Man, what a ride it's been!

We're almost there. Get ready for a longer last chapter. I'm so excited and kind of sad at the same time.
Thank you again for the love and the support, and for showing up at every single chapter! You're the best <3

22nd of July, 2024 

 

10:47 am 

 

 

Tamau 👦

*Image attachment : the Eiffel Tower* 

 

Vita 💖

omg omg omg 

this is real 

dude 

 

i knoooow wtf 

 

why are you here so early though? 

 

there are already a bunch of athletes settling in right now 

lots of interviews and photoshoots  

and it’s actually a good thing 

i need some time for myself 

 

good for you tamau 

oh, tilen says hi 

*Image attachment : a selfie of Vita and Tilen, smiling* 

 

look at you two, not trying to strangle each other 

🥹

 

we just pretend for the sake of mom’s mental health 

 

lmao  

i’m gonna settle in my hotel room, talk later? 

i love you 

 

take plenty of pics 

love youuu 

 

 

23rd of July 

 

06:47 pm 

 

 

Jonas 

I don’t like Nice 

Why did I choose to stay here until Paris? 

 

Woutje 

Because you’re a decent human being and you care about the planet so you’re not booking unnecessary flights 

What’s wrong with Nice? 

 

Too sunny 

Idk 

Or maybe it’s because I know Tadej’s apartment is there, somewhere 

With all of his stuff  

 

You sound like a creep 

 

I know 

He posted some pictures on his Insta 

Looks like he’s having fun 

 

Stop stalking him 

You hate social medias 

You should go out, enjoy the rest 

 

I already went outside this morning to train 

 

You’re impossible 

 

How do you think the team would react if I came out? 

 

Oh wow 

This is a serious question 

 

So? 

 

Do you mean the guys? 

Because half of them know already 

Nobody cares 

 

No, I mean the DS, coaches 

Grischa 

Richard 

Oh god, do you think Richard would fire me?? 

 

Of course not!! 

You’re the leader 

You won the tour twice 

I think everyone would be okay with it, seriously 

It might be a bit complicated with the sponsors though 

 

Yeah, probably 

 

Why? 

Are you planning on coming out soon? 

Cause you know if someone says something about it I’ll kick their asses 

 

I know 

And I don’t think I’m ready anyway 

It’s just 

I want what you have 

A partner, a family  

 

You’ll have it Jonas, no doubt about it 

 

Not before I retire 

I can’t even think about what the media would say 

 

Hey, don’t think about that for now, okay? 

When you feel like you’re ready, we’ll talk about your options 

 

I hate that this has to be a topic anyway 

 

I know, I’m so sorry  

This is your personal life, nobody should have a say about it 

But you know the guys and I will always have your back, right? 

 

I know 

Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful for my career and everything 

Cycling is my whole life 

But sometimes I wish I was just a normal guy who could just hold another guy’s hand in the street 

 

Maybe you should just do it 

It might sound a bit naive and risky but 

You don’t owe anything to the media or the team 

You don’t have to give explanations and write statements 

You can just be yourself 

That’s enough 

 

Yeah 

Maybe you’re right 

 

I’m right most of the time 

 

🙄

You’re the best actually 

Thank you 

 

Of course 

Try and clear your head, okay? 

 

Okay 

 

 

26th of July 

 

05:51 pm 

 

 

Tadeja 

jonas is in paris 

why is jonas in paris? 

 

João 🤙

Because he’s free to do whatever he wants? 

 

he’s not competing though 

 

He has friends who do 

Why do you care? 

 

stop it 

you know i care about him 

 

And I know you’ve ignored him when he asked you to meet and talk like two adults 

 

i didn’t ignore him 

i chose to protect myself 

 

From what? 

Jonas? 

I hope you’re kidding me 

 

he’s a cycling legend!! 

i flirted with a cycling legend 

it does not make any sense 

 

Stop calling him like that 

He’s just Jonas 

You met the guy 

He’s shy and awkward and his lack of social skills is depressing 

 

hey, don’t say this kind of stuff about him 

he’s nice and a good listener and he’s funny in his own weird way 

 

And he’s in Paris right now 

The city of love 

Do something about it 

 

you knew he would be here 

 

And so what? 

 

i don’t know 

I DON’T KNOW 

 

You need to figure your shit out like right now 

 

I KNOW 

I’M TRYING 

 

Try harder 

 

😑😑

 

 

27th of July 

 

07:08 pm 

 

 

Matteo 

Woutje on the podium!!!! 

What a ride man 

 

Jonas 

Yeah it was insane 

 

Wout 

I have to thank Josh’s puncture 

Poor kid 

 

Matteo 

No you deserve it 

BRONZE MEDAL MAN 

 

Jonas 

I might have lost my hearing because of Sarah’s screams but 

It was so worth it 

 

Wout 

Lmao 

Thank you guys 

Feels good I’m not gonna lie 

 

Matteo 

And now you’re gonna win the road race 

 

Jonas 

Matteo 

You’re also competing, you know that right? 

 

Matteo 

Yeah but I have like 0 chance of winning the thing 

 

Wout 

Don’t say that! 

 

Matteo 

It’s fine, I’m just here for the fun  

 

Wout 

Remco is asking if the two of you want to grab a drink 

 

Jonas 

He’s asking us? 

Why? 

 

Wout 

Because he’s nice? Idk 

 

Matteo 

Hell yeah!! 

 

Jonas 

No alcohol Matteo 

 

Matteo 

Whyyyy 

The road race is in a week 

Plenty of time to have some french wine 

And cheese 

 

Jonas 

You’ll have an orange juice and maybe some olives 

 

Matteo 

😒😒

 

Jonas 

It’s for your own good 

You’ll thank me later 

 

Matteo 

I’m not thanking you right now 

 

Wout 

So is it a yes?

 

Matteo

YES

 

Jonas

Yeah okay

 

Wout

Great!

I'll text you later

 

 

28th of July 

 

10:04 pm 

 

 

Tadeja 

jonas went out yesterday 

with van aert and jorgenson 

and fucking evenepoel  

 

João 🤙

Hello to you too 

How do you know that? 

 

instagram 

i didn’t know him and evenepoel were friends?? 

 

They got along pretty well last year during the vuelta 

 

wdym pretty well?? 

 

Idk 

They talked a lot during flat stages  

 

about what? 

 

Idk man! 

What’s going on with you? 

 

i just think it’s weird 

they’re really different 

 

You two are also very different 

 

it’s not the same thing!! 

i’m not saying nasty shit on him to the media 

 

It was not that bad 

And everyone is emotional during the tour, everyone says things they regret later 

 

and now they’re having a drink together and they look like they’re having the time of their lives 

😒😒

 

Oh Tadeja 

Are you jealous? 

🤭

 

WHAT 

no 

 

Yes you are 

That’s cute 

 

no it’s not 

because i’m not 

he can have friends 

i'm totally fine with it 

 

Well, of course you have nothing to worry about when it comes to Remco 

But if you saw him having a date with someone? 

How would you feel about that? 

 

it’s none of my business 

 

No it’s not 

But that’s not what I asked 

 

idk 

i wouldn’t like that 

like it makes me want to throw up and cry 

 

Which means... 

 

something is wrong with me? 

maybe I’m sick?? 

 

Oh boy 

 

ah fuck, i gotta go or i’ll be late  

bye 

 

This conversation is not over!! 

 

 

31st of July, 2024 

 

03:04 pm 

 

 

Jonas 

I saw him 

 

Woutje 

Who? 

 

Tadej 

At the tennis thing 

 

The tennis thing 

Jonas you’re talking about the olympics 

 

Yeah yeah sorry 

Matteo dragged me there 

Anyway 

He was there 

 

And? 

 

The thing was over and we hung out for a bit and he was there talking with some people 

God he looked so good 

Then I realized I had a thing for his hands but that’s not the point 

 

Okay, didn’t need to know that but go on 

 

At one point he looked up 

And he saw me and I was already looking at him but I didn’t even try to hide it because his eyes Wout, his fucking eyes 

I couldn’t look away, and he didn’t either 

He didn’t look angry or anything, just confused maybe 

We just stared at each other until he had to go god knows where 

And I could feel my whole body burn like it was physically painful to just look at him go 

Like it was less painful to lose the tour than to look away 

 

Oh

That's quite intense

 

But I can’t do anything 

Because I’m me and it scares him 

 

The idea of you scares him 

But not you as a person 

You need to show him that this idea of a famous cyclist doesn’t really exist 

It’s not a thing, it’s not real 

There’s only one person here, you 

And yes, you’re a professional cyclist but that’s just a part among others 

 

And how do I do that? 

I tried to explain but it was too much for him and honestly I get it, it’s too much for me sometimes 

 

Okay, I wasn’t supposed to tell you but 

I have a plan 

 

A plan? 

 

Yeah 

João is helping me with it 

And Mikkel  

Well, Mikkel doesn’t know yet but 

 

Mikkel Bjerg? 

 

Yep 

 

I’m not following 

 

Do you trust me, little one? 

 

Yes, always 

 

Good 

Then don’t worry too much, okay? 

You’ll have your shot, I promise 

 

Okay 

I don’t think I understand but thank you? 

 

You’ll thank me at the end of the week 

Now go and have fun with Matteo 

I’ll see you later 

 

Okay, see you 

 

 

08:13 pm 

 

 

Wout VA 

Hey Mikkel, this is Wout van Aert 

João gave me your phone number, I hope it’s okay? 

 

Mikkel Bjerg

Hey Wout! 

Yeah he told me you’d text me, what’s up? 

 

Okay so I know you’re friend with Tadej Pogačar, right? 

 

Yeah? 

How do you know him? 

 

It’s a long story 

Everything I’m going to tell you right now, you’ll have to keep it to yourself, okay? 

 

Okay? 

 

Right, so Tadej and Jonas Vingegaard are basically soulmates 

 

Wait what 

Are we talking about the same persons? 

 

Yep 

I know it sounds crazy but trust me, it’s true, you can ask João about it 

The problem is that their situation is complicated and they met under weird circumstances 

Which means they need some help 

 

When you say soulmates 

You don’t mean platonic soulmates, right? 

 

Absolutely not 

That’s why you have to keep this thing for yourself 

 

I get it, don’t worry about it 

 

Great 

Now, I’ve learnt from João that Tadej is currently staying at the Friedland hotel 

I’ve asked Sarah to go there yesterday and pretend she’s a client to check if they had an accessible rooftop 

 

You did what?? 

 

Turns out they do have one, which is perfect because that’s where Tadej and Jonas are going to meet on Saturday night 

 

Okay slow down 

Why aren’t they meeting somewhere else? Like a restaurant or something? 

 

Because Jonas won the Tour twice, which means french people know his face 

The medias know he’s here and there are already pics everywhere 

They can’t meet somewhere public, it would ruin everything 

But a hotel room is a bit too intimate like they don’t know each other that well you know? 

 

Yeah, okay, makes sense 

So the hotel’s rooftop 

 

The hotel’s rooftop! 

 

That’s great but why are you telling me all this? 

What do I have to do? 

 

I need you to tell Tadej that there will be some kind of party on this rooftop 

Like to celebrate the end of the road race or something 

Tell him there’ll be a bunch of people and it’s going to be so much fun 

 

Do you think he’ll believe me? 

I’m not a great liar 

 

Just text him instead of calling 

Be casual about it 

 

And if he doesn’t want to go? 

 

I don’t know, but you know him, right? 

Just try your best to convince him 

It’s really important  

 

Okay, I’ll do my best 

 

Thank you thank you thank you 

Tell him to be there at 8pm 

You keep me posted, okay? 

 

Alright 

Jonas and Tadej 

It’s like two different worlds colliding  

But I can see it 

 

Welcome to the club, man 

 

 

2nd of August, 2024 

 

06:08 pm 

 

 

Mik 

Tadej! 

What’s up man? Are you enjoying Paris? 

 

Pogi 

heyyyy 

yes, it’s been amazing  

sorry the week has been crazy i didn’t have time to text 

 

No no it’s okay 

Same here 

Actually I wanted to talk to you about something 

 

okay? 

 

There’s this party tomorrow night 

On your hotel’s rooftop 

 

my hotel? really? 

 

Yes 

 

didn’t know they had a bar on the rooftop 

 

They do 

It’s really awesome 

Anyway, it’s a thing for the cyclists, to celebrate the road race and everything 

It would be cool if you could be there 

 

it's really nice of you to ask!! 

but i don’t want to intrude  

 

You’re not, I'm asking you to come 

You know some of them already 

It will be fun 

 

you sure? 

 

Yes, please come  

 

okay, i’ll try to stop by 

 

Great!! 

8pm 

 

noted 

good luck for tomorrow! 

 

Thanks! 

 

 

06:34pm 

 

 

Mikkel Bjerg 

Okay 

I did my best 

He said he’d be there 

 

Wout VA 

This is great!! 

Thank you so much 

 

I hope they will figure things out  

 

They will 

I don’t know how but they will

 

 

Chapter 15: to love.

Notes:

Well, that's it!

First of all : thank you all so much for the incredible support I've received. I've read every comment, smiled at every kudos given and private message sent. I'm actually feeling quite emotional right now. But all good things must come to an end and although I enjoyed every second of writing this story, it's time to say goodbye to it!

Second of all : I hope you'll like this last chapter. I did a mix of everything, I tried different things, but I'm proud of the final result. Hope you are too.

Third of all : I have so many ideas for future AU's and short fics so don't worry, I'll be back very soon! Feel free to suggest your ideas!

Thank you again for taking the time to read this little silly fic as I like to call it.

Until next time <3

 

Tadej Pogacar : the man behind the camera 

 

Alek Javornik  

Hello Tadej, and thank you so much for being here!  

 

Tadej Pogačar

It’s a pleasure, thank you for having me!  

 

A.J. 

It’s been quite a busy month for you, your first Tour de France as a full-time photographer. How was the experience?  

 

T.P. 

Yeah, it has been quite a crazy ride! Three weeks is a lot, and there’s a lot of preparation beforehand. The Tour is like a big circus travelling all around the country. It has been exhausting, I’m not gonna lie, but it has been the most incredible experience of my life. Not only for the cycling part, but also everything that comes with it. People you meet everyday, the landscapes, the stories you hear... I feel like I’m part of the history of the Tour now, and it’s a precious feeling.  

 

A.J.  

Yeah, I totally get it. Working on the Tour is something unique, not many people get to experience that. So, I’m sure our readers want to know more about you. How did you end up here?  

 

T.P. 

Well, it’s quite a long story, so I’ll try to keep it short. I’ve always been into cycling, but it was more of a hobby as kid. I would take my bike to go to school, hang out with some friends... Then my older brother, Tilen, signed up for a local cycling club. I followed him everywhere at the time, so naturally, I wanted to try as well. I joined the Rog Ljubljana Cycling Club at 8 years old. The problem was, I was really small for my age. The bikes were too big for me.  

 

A.J. 

Really?   

 

T.P. 

Yeah! But I’m quite stubborn, so nothing could stop me from riding a bike if I wanted to. I ended up falling in love with cycling. I was riding all the time, trying to get better, faster. The coach signed me up for some races and I was doing pretty well. Years later, I was finally riding a bike that fitted me, and I was winning races. From there, things escalated.   

 

A.J. 

That’s why your name rings a bell for many people, especially here in Slovenia.  

 

T.P.  

Yeah, I guess so. In 2016, I won the Giro della Lunigiana and a stage of the Junior Peace Race. I placed third in the road race of the European Junior Road Championships and became Slovenian champion in the junior time trial.  

 

A.J. 

That’s crazy! How old were you?  

 

T.P.  

17, almost 18. I was really young. But I was having so much fun. That was my main goal, you know. Having fun. But then I thought, maybe I can do this as my job. Become a professional cyclist.  

 

A.J.  

You did not think about it before that?  

 

T.P. 

Not really. I don’t think I realized how good I was, to be honest. And to this day, I think it was a good sign. I loved to win, but I loved the cycling part even more. The freedom of riding my back, the satisfaction that comes after a particularly hard ride. This is what I craved, you know. In 2017, I left the junior category and signed with the Slovenian continental team Rog-Ljubljana. Things became more serious.  

 

A.J. 

You were competing with more experienced riders.  

 

T.P. 

Exactly. I was still a kid. I was 18, barely out of high school. But this is what I wanted. People started to notice me in 2018, when I won the Grand Prix Priessnitz spa and the Tour de l'Avenir. I was 19 years old. At the end of the season, Andrej Hauptman contacted me. I had known him since I was 11. He had a contract for me with a World Tour Team.  

 

A.J.  

Where were you when you found out?  

 

T.P. 

At my parents’ house. My mom was freaking out. She was not thrilled about the whole “becoming a professional cyclist” thing. She was scared for me.  

 

A.J. 

Why?  

 

T.P. 

You know, the doping thing, and being so young. But I told her “I know what I’m doing, trust me.” She did, eventually. But two weeks later, I, hum... Sorry.  

 

A.J. 

It’s okay. Take your time.  

 

T.P. 

It was the beginning of November. I was training back in Slovenia. It was quite cold, but I was used to it. I remember thinking about my next race. It was supposed to be in January, in Australia. Crazy, right? I had never been there. I was so excited. I already knew some of my future team members. I was ready. I thought it was the beginning of something great.  

But then a car came out of nowhere. I don’t remember much of it, to be honest. Just some bits and pieces, sounds. When I woke up in a hospital bed, the first thing I asked was “Will I be able to ride my bike again?”. The doctors said yes, I could. But not at a professional level. My career was over before it even began.  

 

A.J. 

I’m really sorry, Tadej. I can’t imagine how you felt.  

 

T.P. 

I was angry. Frustrated. It took me a long time to ride my bike again. Not just because of the physical injuries. It’s just an object, when you think about it. A way to move from a place to another. But after the crash, when I looked at my old bike, I saw something that took away so much from me. I had to learn to think differently. Consider it as something that gave me many things. Passion, discipline friendship. Things that matter more than winning a race.  

 

A.J.  

How did you do that? Learn to think differently?  

 

T.P. 

Photography helped a lot. I’ve always been interested in it. It helped me calm down when I was a kid. To focus on something long enough to be able to capture it. I loved the idea of showing the world as I saw it. I’ve always been bad with words and expressing my feelings in general. It was always too much, like everything was spilling out and I had no control over it. But when I grab my camera, I’m the one in charge. I can decide what I want to share, what I want to express. What I want people to focus on.  

 

A.J. 

I think that’s why people are so captivated by your photographs. There’s something raw about them, but beautiful at the same time.  

 

T.P.  

Thank you, I appreciate that. That’s what I’m trying to do. The world can be a tough place. Horrible things happen every day. You can’t escape the suffering, it’s part of life. But you can choose to look at things a different way. There’s beauty everywhere. You just have to be patient sometimes.

 

A.J. 

What inspires you every day? Do you have a muse or something like that?  

 

T.P. 

I don’t think I have that, no. I just go with the flow, I try to trust my gut. Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn’t. But I do get inspired by a lot of things. Nature, small towns in the middle of nowhere, people in general. When it comes to cycling, I can’t help but admire the suffering. You can see it on these guys’ faces, how much it hurts. How much they have to sacrifice to be there, on top of those beautiful mountains. They ha ve to earn it, you know? They have to go through the pain to reach the other side. It’s kind of poetic.  

 

A.J. 

Is there a particular rider that you enjoy photographing?  

 

T.P. 

Hm, I don’t know. They’re all very different, with different riding styles. Photographing a sprinter is not the same thing as photographing a climber. You have to try different techniques, different angles to find the right shot. I think I’m better at photographing climbers. Maybe it’s because I was supposed to be one but I feel closer to them. People like Primož of course, who is obviously on a league of his own. Or Vingegaard, who’s more on the quiet side.  

 

A.J. 

Speaking of Vingegaard, what did you think of his performance this year?  

 

T.P. 

Primož was the best this year, there’s no point trying to deny it. But what Jonas did during this Tour... I don’t think people understand how incredible that was. A few months ago, he was in a hospital bed, fighting for his career. For his life. And he did it in a way that was... Graceful. He didn’t make bold statements, didn’t try to convince the media that he was ready to race again. He just did. He trained hard, showed up and gave everything he had. He always shows some deep respect towards the Tour and its legacy. He’s the kind of athlete I would have liked to become.  

 

A.J. 

Well, if he’s disappointed about his second place, I’m sure your words will cheer him up!  

 

T.P. 

I hope so.  

 

A.J. 

Thank you so much for taking the time to answer my questions, Tadej. I’m sure there’s a bright future waiting for you, we’re all excited to see it!  

 

 

 

 

3rd of August, 2024 

 

07:52 pm  

 

 

Jonas 

Alright, I’m on the rooftop  

I just wanted to thank you. You are both amazing friends and even if things don’t go right tonight, I know I’ll be okay because I have you guys.  

 

Wout 

Why do you sound like you’re going to war?  

 

Matteo 

Because he is  

He’s going to get the love of his life back  

It’s supposed to be a dramatic moment  

 

Jonas  

It sure feels dramatic up there  

I’m a tiny bit panicking right now  

 

Wout 

You’ll be fine  

Just be yourself and say what you have to say  

 

Jonas 

Yeah, okay  

Wish me luck  

 

Matteo 

WE’RE ROOTING FOR YOU LITTLE GUY  

 

 

 

 

Paris had always been a special place for Jonas.  

Down there, on these roads, he became a Tour de France winner. He rode on the cobblestones wearing that bright yellow jersey. The perfect colour. The perfect race.  

And then, he did it again. It was not luck. It was not a coincidence. He made a name for himself. Before that, he was just another rider. After the Tour, he became someone.  

But up there, on that rooftop in the middle of the city, Jonas felt small. He could see the Champs-Elysées. The Eiffel Tower. He could hear people chanting in the streets, glasses being filled with champagne. When he closed his eyes, he was back in 2022. The sounds were similar, as well as the air around him, thick with something he couldn’t quite explain.   

He had felt on top of the world, back then. Like he could die in peace because his name was added to the prestigious list of Grand Tour’s winners. Jonas Vingegaard. It was written there, on the trophy. He could almost taste the victory on his tongue.   

 

And then, he had to do it again. Because people tend to forget about your achievements. They get bored. They need more, always more. They need interviews and photoshoots and fun videos on social medias. They need to know everything, all the time, until they feel like you belong to them.   

Jonas hated this idea. He liked his freedom. Liked his loneliness. But they took that away from him and he couldn’t say anything because he had to be grateful. Humble. Nice.   

But it wasn’t enough. It was never enough. Until he crashed, back in April. Jonas thought it was kind of funny. It’s like when someone die, and all of a sudden, people care. People start listening. But it’s too late. There’s nothing to listen to anymore.  

People liked seeing him vulnerable. Because it made him more human. More relatable. But Jonas didn’t feel more human. He felt weak and it hurt like hell. And then the media started writing things and it messed with his head a little. He wasn’t talking, with anyone. Only training and eating and sleeping because he needed to win again. He had to entertain people. He needed to prove them. Prove them what, he didn’t really know.  

But who was he, if not a winner?  

Nothing. Nobody. Just a guy from Denmark with a really common name.   

 

And then Tadej texted him.  

Jonas didn’t like surprises or spontaneity or chaos. He didn’t like talking to strangers and he hated calling people.  

But he liked Tadej. He liked talking about simple things and calling late at night and whisper secrets in the dark. He liked waking up with a text from him and he liked feeling important for someone else. Someone who didn’t even know who he really was. Someone who didn’t care about that. Someone who listened to him, even if it was about collecting flowers.   

He was Jonas again. And how sweet it was, to just be himself. How freeing. He didn’t feel too small or too big. When he talked with Tadej, he felt just... right. Like him existing in this world was enough. It was enough for Tadej. Because Tadej didn’t expect anything. He was only appreciating his presence and that was so comforting.  

But then he lost that. Because at one point, he had to go back to being Jonas Vingegaard. Like a costume that didn’t fit anymore, but he had to put it on anyway. It was itchy and uncomfortable. It was suffocating. Life without Tadej had become suffocating.  

 

A door opened behind him. Then closed.   

Jonas took a deep breath. 08:24 pm. The sky was beautiful. Golden.  

He turned around.   

Tadej was standing there. Wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of jeans. He was looking everywhere around him, a deep frown on his face. It made him look older than he was. Finally, finally, his gaze landed on Jonas. The frown was gone, replaced by surprise and then a confused expression.   

Jonas couldn’t hear anything but the beating of his own heart. It took him back months ago, when he was laying on the ground, waiting for the ambulance, unable to breathe, to move. He had thought about this moment for so long. Had wished for it, had dreamed about a hundred different scenarios. He should have prepared some kind of speech, but he wasn’t a gifted writer, even in his mother tongue.   

Eventually, he took a step forward, then another. Tadej didn’t move. He kept on looking at Jonas, his eyes so bright, so full of life and hope and fear. It’s like every emotion could be read and Tadej didn’t try to hide them. That’s another thing Jonas liked about him. The honesty. Which made him think about his own mistakes.  

 

“I’m sorry I lied,” Jonas says, his voice sounding weird and foreign.  

 

It was a poor apology, and he needed to say more, but a lump was forming in his throat because Tadej was there, meters away from him, and it was too much. It was everything and not enough. It was his biggest fear and the thing he wanted the most in life and he couldn’t mess up again.  

 

“I know,” Tadej answers, and it feels like he doesn’t know what to say either, so they stay like that a few more seconds, maybe a few more minutes, just looking at each other. This is terrifying. Having so much to lose. It’s unbearable.   

Jonas needs to say something. He has to do something. He can’t lose this. He can’t lose Tadej. He’s not sure he’d be able to survive it. And how dramatic it sounds, in his head. But how true it feels.   

 

"I didn’t plan this”, Jonas can’t help but justify himself. “I mean, I know you didn’t want to talk to me anymore-”  

“It’s not that I didn’t want to talk to you”, Tadej interrupts, his gaze lowering on the ground. “I just... I needed some time to process the fact that you’re... Well, you.”  

 

And there it is. It’s like Jonas can’t escape it. His own identity, his own fate. And that’s what he wanted, back in 2019, when he signed with Jumbo. To build a career he would be proud of. To be able to say: “I’m a professional cyclist.” But right now, he wished he was just a bike seller in a little town in Denmark because then, Tadej would look him in the eyes and see him. Jonas.   

 

“I get it.” Jonas’ voice is quivering, on the verge of breaking, but he has to say more. He needs to say more. “But, Tadej, you have to understand... What you see on TV and what you read online, it’s... This person does not exist. It’s a combination of what I’m willing to show and what journalists and people in general are interpreting.”  

 

Tadej finally looks up, and Jonas has to take a deep breath, because the sun is reflecting in those beautiful blue eyes, and maybe there’s a little bit of green in there too.  

“The truth is... I was born in Hillerslev. I grew up in a small village and people thought I had a hearing problem because I didn’t answer them when they talked to me but it’s just that I didn’t like to talk, in general. But I liked flowers and warm tea with honey and cycling. That’s actually the only thing I was good at. But I wasn’t the best, and the idea of becoming a professional cyclist was almost laughable at the time, but I trained hard, really hard, and I eventually made it. And it was scary and overwhelming but I met Wout and he made things easier. I thought I could become a good domestique and help leaders during Grand Tours and that was the goal, but then shit happened and I had no choice but to become a leader too and people started noticing me. I hated that. I hated... The attention. Not the winning part. I like to win. But... Yeah. I’m not... I’m not the guy you see on screens. I don’t know how to act in front of a camera. I only know how to ride a bike and I know a lot about flowers and random facts about things people don’t care about. I like to be alone. And read. And watch cooking shows. That’s it. That’s... That’s me. I’m just Jonas.”  

 

Jonas is almost breathless, just like at the end of a particularly hard climb. He didn’t really think much, because Tadej’s presence in front of him is quite distracting, but he had nothing else to give. No cool stories about being a professional athlete or a dramatic story about a childhood tragedy. He’s just a guy. And he doesn’t want to lie anymore so, if that’s not enough for Tadej, then...   

 

“You sure talk a lot for someone who doesn’t like talking”, Tadej says, not able to hold back a smile.  

“It’s different, with you”, Jonas shrugs, because it’s the truth. It’s that simple. Like breathing and walking and riding his bike. He doesn’t have to think about it. It comes naturally.   

 

Tadej takes a step forward. Jonas doesn’t know him enough to be able to read his eyes. He hopes he get the chance to learn, someday.   

 

“I just... I need to be sure, about something”, Tadej bites his lower lip, and it’s driving Jonas a little insane.  

“About what?” Jonas asks, almost pleading, almost ready to give Tadej anything he wants, because he knows now. He knows he’s down bad, his heart not belonging to him anymore. He just gave Tadej the power to just crush it and he’s fine with this choice.  

Tadej doesn’t answer. He stays silent, standing just in front of Jonas. They’re almost the same height. They’re close enough so that Jonas can count the freckles on Tadej’s nose and cheeks. He wants to touch it, feel the skin under his fingertips. He wants to memorize every inch of that beautiful face, to be able to draw it in his mind.   

“Close your eyes”, Tadej says, and Jonas does without even thinking about it, and that’s when it hits him. He trusts Tadej. And Jonas doesn’t trust a lot of people. It should scare him. But he’s not scared. Not anymore.   

Jonas can feel a warm hand on his left cheek. His heart skips a beat. Times slows down. Or maybe it speeds up. He’s not sure anymore, because when he tries to take a breath, Tadej’s lips are on his own, and it feels like time is just a weird concept.  

Jonas sighs into the kiss, the tension that has been building for the past few months finally leaving his body. He doesn’t think, doesn’t try to understand what’s happening. He doesn’t really care. He only focuses on Tadej’s hands, cupping his face like he’s the most precious thing in the world, on Tadej’s comforting smell, on Tadej’s tongue and its sweet taste. Tadej, Tadej, Tadej. Everywhere, all at once, and it’s the best thing in the world, it’s what he was made for. He forgets everything about cycling and podiums and the fucking Eiffel tower in the background because Tadej is still kissing him, his hands travelling down his body, landing on his waist, and Jonas can feel his skin burning in the sweetest way.  

 

They eventually part, both out of breath, and Jonas doesn’t want to open his eyes because it might be just a dream. But then Tadej is laughing, and the sound is so beautiful it makes him dizzy.  

“What?” Jonas asks, his brain still trying to understand what just happened. Tadej shakes his head, a fond smile on his face. His cheeks are red, just as his lips, and Jonas wants to kiss them again.  

“I just... I was so angry when I found out. And maybe I was disappointed because you lied but that’s not the only reason. I was mad because I was so sure that I could not have you the way I wanted. Because you’re famous and you’re living the life I’ve always wanted.”  

How silly Jonas feels at this moment. How stupid. He did not think, even for a second, about how Tadej must feel when he looks at him ride his bike during races. Step on the podium with his trophy in his hand. This is what Tadej was supposed to do. Everything was planned, from his teammates to his role during a Grand Tour. He was born to be a leader, a champion.   

Jonas is the embodiment of what he had lost. Of what he could have become.   

“Tadej, I’m so-”  

“Don’t you dare say it,” Tadej interrupts him, grabbing his hands in his own. “Don’t be sorry. Be proud. You deserve to be where you are today.”  

“You deserved to be there with me, too”, Jonas whispers.  

People are still singing in the streets. There’s a nice breeze, and it messes with Jonas’ hair, but Tadej is there to fix it, a smile on his face. He looks calm. At peace.   

“But then I saw you, on the podium. Looking at your team with that smile on your face. In the streets of Paris, cheering for your friends, playing with Wout’s children. And then I thought, that’s the guy I’ve been talking to for the past few weeks. That’s him, right there. And Jonas, you could be a bike seller, or a cashier or, I don’t know, a fucking juggler. I don’t give a damn. I think I just want to hear you talk about flowers and about anything you want. And watch you win a Grand Tour or two.”  

It’s Jonas’ turn to laugh now, or maybe he’s crying a little bit. Or maybe it’s raining. It doesn’t really matter, anyway. Because Tadej is laughing too and it sounds beautiful.  

“You say I deserved to be there with you, but I’m already here. Maybe this is where I was supposed to be. Not on a podium but waiting for you at the end of each race.”  

He’s crying. Jonas is totally crying right now.  

“Didn’t know you were such a romantic, Tadej Pogačar”, Jonas smiles despite the tears falling down his cheeks.  

“I’m full of surprises, Jonas Vingegaard”.  

 

When they kiss again, there’s a loud cheer coming from the streets below.  

Maybe it’s because some French athlete just became an Olympic champion. But Jonas chooses to believe people are cheering for them.   

 

 

 

26th of October, 2024 

 

10:03 pm  

 

 

Jonas 😻  

Tadej  

Tadej pick up your phone  

I’m serious it’s dark outside I’m going to get lost  

 

Tadej ❤️

why are you outside??  

 

Because you ran away you idiot!  

Come back so we can talk about it  

   

nope  

nothing to talk about  

 

Tadej you’re being ridiculous  

 

i  know  

that’s why i’m hiding  

   

You don’t have to hide  

Never  

Not with me  

   

i wasn’t supposed to say it now  

i know it’s too soon  

fuck i’m such a mess  

 

Hey, you’re not a mess  

You’re perfect  

 

i’m not so sure about that  

 

Did you mean it?  

   

of course  

i didn’t even have to think about it  

 

Then come back so I can say it back  

 

you don’t have to, just because i said it  

 

God Tadej  

I’ve been wanting to tell you for months  

But I want to look at you when I say it for the first time  

So stop running around and come back  

 

really?  

 

Really  

Now hurry up, I’m freezing  

 

okay, yeah  

 

 

1st of December, 2024 

 

10:07 am  

 

 

Tadej ❤️

is everything okay?  

no delays?  

 

Jonas 😻

Everything is fine  

Hey, I’m the one who’s supposed to be anxious  

I’m about to meet your family  

 

you have nothing to worry about, they’re going to love u  

i’m more worried about how they’re gonna act honestly  

i know vita is plotting something  

 

Plotting, really?  

   

yeah  

she’s definitely going to show u embarrassing baby pictures  

   

Aw  🥰

I’m sure you were a really cute baby  

 

don’t you dare make fun of me!!  

   

Of course not!  

Who do you think I am?  

 

🙄🙄

i can’t wait to see you  

 

Me too  

I’ve missed you a lot  

I’m about to board now  

 

alright, have a safe flight  

text me when you land, okay?  

 

Okay!  

i  love you  

 

I love you too  

 

 

14th of February, 2025 

 

08:46 pm  

 

 

Incoming FaceTime call – Tadej 

 

 

Jonas 😻

Hey babe!  

 

Tadej ❤️

Hi! God, it’s so good to hear your voice. And see your face.  

 

Yeah, I needed that. I’m sorry I couldn’t call you sooner, it’s been a crazy week.  

 

It’s okay. You look tired. Are you sleeping well? And eating enough?  

 

Yeah, the team always takes good care of me, don’t worry. How are you? Are you enjoying Portugal?  

 

Yeah, it’s been fun. Remco says hi, by the way.  

 

I can’t believe you two are friends now.  

 

He’s such a nice guy, really funny too!  

 

Oh, really? A few months ago he was a “little shit who should keep his hands to himself instead of touching my boyfriend”...  

 

Yeah, alright, I changed my mind. But I still don’t like the touching thing.  

 

You know he’s married, right? To a woman?  

 

I don’t care, I don’t like it.  

 

Okay, okay. You’re cute when you’re jealous.  

 

I’m not jealous! I’m just... What’s the word...  

 

Possessive?   

 

No, I don’t like that word. You’re not an object I can claim.  

 

I don’t mind it. You can claim me.  

 

Jonas! This is not healthy. Hot but not healthy.  

 

I don’t care. I’m yours. You can be possessive all you want.  

   

Don’t say things like that, it’s making me... Damn, English is hard...  

   

Well, “hard” is maybe the right word...  

   

Jonas, stop it!  

 

You’re blushing.  

   

No, I’m not.  

 

Yes you are.  

 

Okay, I am, but you’re flirting with me! And saying nasty things! I thought you were all innocent, with your blonde hair and your blue eyes. Looking like an angel.  

 

You love it.  

 

Yeah, I do. And I love you.  

 

I love you too. So, so much. I’m sorry we can’t be together on Valentine’s Day.  

 

It’s okay, we’ll have a few days together before Paris-Nice. We can have a proper date, then.  

 

Yeah, that would be nice.  

 

I’m going to put the phone against the wall, I have some work to do.   

 

You know who else you can put against the wall?  

 

Jonas, I swear to God-  

   

Sorry, sorry!  

 

 

5th of July, 2025 

 

09:16 am  

 

 

Tadej ❤️

where are u??  

see, this is why we are not supposed to be apart from each other  

you’re so tiny i might lose you somewhere  

 

Jonas 😻

This is for the best love, I need to be entirely focused on the Tour  

And I’m not tiny, you’re barely taller than me!  

 

you can be focused AND sleep in the same bed as your boyfriend every night  

 

Grischa disagrees  

 

i hate grischa  

   

No you don’t  

And the guys are not allowed to spend the night with their wives either  

No exception for us  

 

this is laaaaaaame 😒

i’m going to file a complaint  

 

Oh, really?  

Against who?  

 

idk  

the fucking UCI  

 

Good luck with that  

I’ll be there in a sec  

   

hurry up  

i missed you  

   

We saw each other last night  

I missed you too  

 

 

26th of July, 2025 

 

08:24 pm  

 

 

Tadej ❤️

oh my god  

i'm so fucking sorry  

please don’t be mad  

oh fuck you’re going to break up with me aren’t you?  

 

Jonas 😻

Tadej  

 

i didn’t think  

it’s just  

you looked so good in your yellow jersey  

and you fucking won the tour and i thought “oh my god, my boyfriend just won the tour for the third time” and i’m so fucking proud  

but i just ruined everything  

   

Tadej, love, it’s okay  

   

the sponsors  

what are they going to say  

shit shit shit  

we can tell it was a joke?  

i’ll take the blame  

 

Tadej stop it  

It’s okay  

 

i kissed you in front of the whole world  

it’s not okay  

   

It is  

It’s okay  

The team and I have been in contact with the sponsors already  

They’re fine with it  

   

wait  

what?  

   

I’ve been thinking about it for some time and I’m tired of hiding it, of hiding you  

I love you more than anything, more than cycling  

The team wanted to warn the sponsors beforehand but even if they hadn’t been okay with it, I wouldn't care  

I want to be able to kiss my boyfriend after winning the Tour  

   

jonas  

are u sure about it?  

i didn’t want to pressure you into a forced coming-out  

 

I’ve never wanted to come out in the first place  

Like, why would I do it? I love you and that’s it. Nobody deserves an explanation  

I just needed a little push, I guess  

 

well, that was a big push...  

 

That was perfect  

You’re perfect  

Now, where are you hiding?  

   

how do u know i’m hiding?  

 

You always do that  

 

and you always find me  

 

We’re a great team, don’t you think?  

   

we are  

fuck, i can’t believe i did that  

 

Honestly, I’m surprised it didn’t happen sooner  

The whole team is asking where you are  

We’re waiting for you to celebrate  

   

yeah, okay  

i'll be there in 5  

i love you i love i love you  

my fucking champion  

 

Your fucking champion  

I love you more   

 

 

10th of October, 2025 

 

02:15 pm  

 

 

Tadej ❤️

*Image attachment: Tadej’s hand holding a small, yellow flower*

look what i found!  

a new flower for your notebook  

 

Jonas 😻

It looks cute 🥰

 

i know!!  

how are we going to call it?  

 

What’s the word for “cute” in slovenian?  

   

u know this one, i always say it!  

srčkano  

 

Oh right  

 

in danish?  

   

Sød  

   

hm  

sødkano?  

   

It sounds lovely!  

   

i think so too  

   

Thank you, by the way  

For doing this  

   

i love it actually  

every time i see a flower i think about you and it makes me so happy  

even when the day is shit  

   

I love you  

It’s insane how much I do  

   

it’s not insane  

it’s perfectly normal  

the perfect amount ❤️

 

Yeah  

The perfect amount of love ❤️

 

 

27th of February, 2026 

 

06:47 pm  

 

 

Incoming call – Tadej 

 

Jonas 😻

Hey.

 

Tadej ❤️

Oh my god Jonas.  

 

No, sweetheart, don’t cry. It’s okay, I’m alright.  

 

Wout told me you were okay but I really needed to hear your voice.  

   

I know love, I know.  

   

How are you feeling? What did the doctors say?  

 

Concussion, a broken rib. Nothing crazy.  

   

Nothing crazy? For fuck's sake Jonas, that’s not nothing!  

   

I’m sorry, I didn’t want to scare you.  

     

It’s not your fault, it’s... God I hate this.  

   

I know, me too. But I’ll be alright, I’ve been through worse.  

   

I know.  

   

What are you doing? I can hear you typing on something.  

 

I’m booking a flight to come see you.  

 

What? No, absolutely not! You’re working, you can’t leave everything behind for-  

 

Of course I’m going to leave everything! You’re hurt and you’re alone in a hospital bed and I can’t stay away, okay?  

   

Tadej, min elskede, I’ll be alright, I promise.  

 

Yes, you’ll be. And I’ll be here to make sure of it. Don’t even try to argue, it’s bad for your concussion and the flight is already booked.  

 

I-Okay.  

 

I’ll be there soon, okay? I need to see you. I need to- To kiss you and make sure you’re alright. I can’t think straight and it’s like I can’t breathe and-  

 

Okay love, it’s alright. I’m waiting for you.  

   

Okay. You should sleep now, I’m going to pack. I’ll be here when you wake up.  

 

Thank you. I love you.  

 

I love you. I’ll love you forever, you know that, right?  

 

I know. I’m alive Tadej, you can breathe.  

   

I’ll breathe when I’ll feel your heartbeat against the palm of my hand. I’ll be there in a few hours, sleep well ljubi.

 

 

24th of May, 2026 

 

07:06 pm  

 

 

Tadej ❤️

you did it  

you fucking did it  

oh my god you look so good in pink  

MY PINK CHAMPION  

 

Jonas 😻

I can’t believe it  

I’m still shaking  

 

you’re so amazing and talented and incredible ❤️❤️

i knew you could do it  

that’s it  

you’ve won the three grand tours at least once  

 

I couldn’t have done it without you  

 

i didn’t do anything  

 

Yes you did  

You push me every day, you inspire me  

You help me see things in a different way  

I’m just so thankful, so lucky to have you by my side  

 

jonas  

we’re both lucky  

i can’t wait to see you  

 

I’m coming home tonight  

 

what??  

but what about the celebrations? the party?  

u deserve to have some fun  

 

I want to celebrate with you  

It’s been way too long I can’t wait any longer  

 

okay i’m not going to try to convince you to stay there because i miss you too much  

and I promised i’ll be there waiting for you after each race  

 

And that’s better than any trophy  

 

🥹🥹

my danish bikeseller

i love youuuuu

 

I love you, always ❤️

 

 

3rd of August, 2026 

 

07:09 pm  

 

 

Jonas  

Guys  

 

Matteo 

???  

 

Wout  

What?  

 

Jonas  

I need your help  

 

Wout  

Oh no  

I’m having war flashbacks  

What did you do  

 

Jonas  

Nothing!  

It wasn’t me  

 

Matteo  

What’s happening???  

 

Jonas  

*Image attachment: Jonas’ hand, a silver ring on one of his fingers* 

 

Matteo  

OMG  

NO FUCKING WAY

 

Wout  

Wait  

WAIT  

Is that an engagement ring???  

 

Jonas  

We have a wedding to plan  

 

Wout  

Oh god

   

Matteo  

YAYYYYYYY