Chapter Text
“He is absolutely perfect,” Louis says. He and Harry are visiting Sarah and Mitch to meet their second son, Theo. Louis cradles the two week old in his arms, amazed by how tiny he is, while Harry entertains his older brother, Rory.
“Makes you want one, huh?” Mitch asks. Louis sighs, thinking of the best way to answer this question for the thousandth time.
Because yes, he and Harry would love to be parents. But they just don’t see it in the cards for them. When they first met on the X-factor, Louis had already presented as a Dominant. The circle on his wrist had been filled in with the color red ever since he was thirteen years old. Harry’s had remained just an empty circle, signaling him as a neutral. Everyone presented between ten and fifteen years old. But then a couple weeks after they lost the show, at sixteen years old, Harry woke up with his circle now red. He soon grew into his nature, becoming a kind, yet firm dom.
It caused some tension in his relationship with Louis at first, but they worked it out and discovered how to navigate their new normal.
Mitch and Sarah both being neutrals didn’t quite understand the scrutiny that they face as a couple. Society may be changing, but people are still extremely wary of dom/dom couples, especially when they’re both male.
They’ve explained that to their friends before, saying how hard it would be for them to adopt when everyone is so distrusting of couples like them.
So instead of restating that fact, Louis replies, “With our lifestyle, I just don’t see us being able to care for a baby.” And it’s true. They always seem to be traveling, whether it be for meetings, recording music, promoting new albums or touring. It doesn’t feel like a stable environment for a child.
“What about adopting a sub? Specifically a little?” Sarah says.
This question has Louis' mind spinning. It’s not the first time this has come up, but he hasn’t thought about it for quite a while. He and Harry had discussed this years ago when One Direction first went on hiatus. But then Harry got signed to make a solo album and their lives became all about music once again.
“Think about it,” Sarah continues. “Talk to Harry. Neither of you are releasing music for a while, there’d be plenty of time for you to stay home and help them adjust. You should talk to my sister, she’s a social worker at a local shelter for abused subs. She’s really knowledgeable about all this, she could answer any questions you have.”
“Thanks, yea, I’ll see what Harry thinks,” he replies. Just then, the little one in his arms starts to cry, and Louis promptly hands him back to his mum.
He goes to see where his husband had gone off to, and finds him on the patio, listening intently to the winding, nonsensical story the toddler is telling him, while ensuring the little one doesn’t wander too close to the edge where he could stumble down the curb. Louis is once again struck by how wonderful of a dad Harry would be.
Maybe Sarah is right. Maybe now is the time for them to find someone to care for, someone who needs a home and a family.
He doesn’t bring it up to Harry that day. But the thought is constantly on his mind.
It’s a couple of weeks later, and they’re back at Mitch and Sarah’s house, along with Sarah’s sister Emily. Weeks of sleepless nights have caught up with the parents, and the other three are there to give them a much needed break.
Harry is once again outside with Rory, while Louis is in the living room feeding the baby a bottle. Emily is on the floor, surrounded by baskets of laundry that she’s folding.
They work silently for a while, Louis lost in his thoughts about his last conversation with Sarah. But when Theo falls asleep in his arms, cooing quietly, Louis can’t keep his questions to himself.
“Can I ask you something,” he says to Emily.
“Of course,” she replies.
“Sarah says you work at a shelter for abused subs.”
Emily nods in confirmation and waits for Louis to continue.
“And there are littles there?”
“Yea, more than there should be.”
“What do you mean?” He asks.
“Well littles make up such a tiny percentage of our population. And they’re only a small percentage of subs. And yet about twenty percent of the subs living there are littles,” she explains.
“Why is that?”
“Aside from young children, they’re the most vulnerable members of our society. When they’re in little space they’re dependent on those around them. Even out of headspace they’re very easily controlled. And many of them don’t even understand what abuse is.”
“I didn’t realize it was that bad,” Louis says as he wonders how someone can harm someone so innocent.
“How often are they in little space?” He asks. “The ones at the shelter?”
“It really depends on the individual. Some are little almost all of the time. Some go in and out. A couple barely slip at all.”
“But if they’re little doesnt going into headspace help them? Why would they stay up? Wouldn’t going into headspace be comforting for them?”
“You have to understand, a lot of them suffered abuse and neglect while under. They’d wake up and find that they’d been assaulted while unable to do anything about it, or that they’d been left alone the whole time without help. People would tell them they’re too much work, too needy.”
“God, how can people be so awful?”
“I ask that all the time. There’s one girl, in her early twenties. Youngest of seven kids, the only sub and little. Her siblings were all doms. And her parents just turned a blind eye and let them do whatever they wanted to her. Encouraged it even, said it was practice. Even let other people use her, for a fee of course. Luckily a couple months ago the right person found out about it and called the cops. She’s been in the shelter ever since.”
“The poor thing,” Louis says, trying to block out the awful images her story is making in his head.
“Yea, I think she’s only been in headspace once or twice since she’s been at the shelter. She always wants to be aware of what’s going on around her. Despite everything she’s still such a sweet girl.”
Before Louis can ask another question the back door opens, and Rory comes running in, Harry trailing behind him. Sensing that he’d interrupted a conversation he asks, “Whatcha guys talking about?”
“Emily was telling me about her work at the shelter for submissives,” Louis replies, not wanting to say more in front of the curious three year old.
They spend the rest of the day there, Harry cooking dinner for everyone. By the time they leave, Mitch and Sarah are looking refreshed and Louis can’t help the warm smile on his face when he sees them with their kids, a perfect, happy family.
He drives home, Harry watching him from the passenger seat. They’ve been together long enough for Harry to know something is stirring in Louis' head, but he’s not sure what it might be.
“That was fun today,” he says in order to start the conversation.
“Yea, it’s always nice to hang with them and help out,” Louis replies.
“I had fun playing football with Rory. I mean, he’s better than me but who isn’t?” He says with a laugh. Louis chuckles lightly and Harry continues, “How was it hanging with Emily? You guys talked about the shelter for abused subs right?”
Louis takes a deep breath before saying, “Yea. It was a lot. I didn’t realize how bad it could be. Especially for littles.” He’s quiet for a moment before adding, “Did you know how many littles end up in shelters? And some of them are too scared to go into their little space because of all the abuse and neglect. It’s just awful, Harry.”
Without a doubt this is what’s bothering Louis, and Harry takes a moment to collect his thoughts. He’s about to reply when Louis says, “Do you remember when we considered it?”
“Considered what?”
“Adopting a little,” Louis replies.
“Yea,” Harry says. “I remember. We couldn’t because I got signed.”
“It wasn’t the right time then.”
“And you think now would be?” Harry asks.
“I do. If you still want that.”
“I think I would, yea. And you, do you want this too?”
Louis smiles and replies, “I really do. I mean, growing up with all my younger siblings, there’s a part of me that’s always loved taking care of others. And if we can help even one person heal from a terrible situation, then yea, I want to do that.”
“Okay,” Harry says. “Then let’s do this.”
They pull up at their house just as they make this decision. Putting the car in park Louis turns to lean over the center console and give Harry a kiss.
“I love you,” he says and Harry replies with the same.
They wait a couple more days to make sure they’re serious about their decision and then ask Emily if she could meet up with them. She comes to their home for lunch, and though they didn’t say exactly what they wanted to talk about, she had a pretty good idea.
So she isn’t surprised when Harry asks, “how might we go about adopting a little?” as soon as lunch was served.
“Sorry,” he says. “Didn’t mean to blurt that out right away. It’s just, we decided a few days ago that this is what we want to do, and I know that it’s probably going to be quite a process, with us being two male doms and everything so I just want to get started as soon as possible I guess. And I know there’s probably a million things we need to do and learn and-” he cuts off his rambling and mutters one more quiet sorry.
“Don’t be sorry,” Emily says. “It’s refreshing to see someone so eager and excited. You’re right that there is a bit of a process involved and it usually is more difficult for two male doms. But the two of you have a couple advantages, especially the fact that you’ve been married for over a decade. And people only ever have nice things to say about the both of you. You’re two celebrities that haven’t been in any sort of scandal since before the wedding. That’s impressive. Nearly unheard of. Proves you both have good character.”
“So you think it’ll be possible? That we’ll get approved?” Louis asks.
“Oh yes. I don’t want to get your hopes up too much by saying it's definite, but I have a good feeling it will go how you’d like it to.”
Hearing those words calms down the couple, and they listen closely to the process Emily describes.
They enjoy lunch and as Emily leaves she says, “If you come to the shelter Monday we can get the paperwork started.”
“We’ll be there,” Louis replies and Harry says, “Thank you so much, for all of your help.”
“I’m happy to,” Emily says. “I’ve known you guys for a while, it would make me immensely happy to see a sub in your home. I know the two of you will take excellent care of a little in need.”
Her parting words leave them feeling hopeful all weekend, and they enter the shelter Monday afternoon full of nervous excitement. Emily greets them and brings her straight to her office, passing by a day room on their way.
There’s a chorus of “Good Afternoon Miss Emily” as she passes and she replies “Good afternoon everyone. I hope you’re all having a good day so far.”
Harry and Louis glance in the room, seeing a dozen people. They’re all engaged in different activities such as reading and games like scrabble.
“This is one of two day rooms, meant for our older residents. Basically anyone not in headspace can hang out here. There’s another day room upstairs full of games and crafts where we bring anyone who is in a little space and is roughly three or up mentally. The nursery and sleeping spaces are upstairs as well.”
She leads them a little further before entering a room with her name on the door. She motions to the chairs in front of her desk and Harry and Louis sit down.
“Here are the basic forms to get started,” she says, handing each of them a stack of paper and a pen. “Get used to this, everything needs to be documented in extreme detail so there’ll be plenty of these to fill out.”
They all laugh as the two men get to work writing their information. After a couple minutes Emily’s phone rings. After a brief call she says, “Excuse me for a moment,” and steps out.
Then minutes later the door opens, but instead of Emily it’s a young man.
“Hello, I’m Eric Maas, one of the case workers here. Miss Jones is helping one of the residents and it’s requiring a bit more of her time than she expected so she asked me to check in on you,” he says.
After quick introductions they spend some time going over the form, and Eric answers any questions that Harry and Louis have. After another few minutes everything is set and Eric leads them back outside and they head home.
That evening they get a text from Emily that reads, “Sorry about earlier, one of the girls I’ve been working with finally slipped to little space. It’s only her third time doing that with us and it had been weeks since that last time so I had to stay with her”
After reassuring her that they completely understood she sent another message saying she’d submitted their forms and they should hear back soon.
As expected, the process takes a number of weeks. There’s background checks, home visits, and about a million more forms, but finally, they’re approved.
Now it’s time to start the next task of finding the right submissive. Harry and Louis are invited to spend a couple days visiting the shelter and interacting with the residents. At the end of the second day they’re back in Emily’s office.
“So,” she begins. “Is there anyone who you think will be the right fit for you?”
“I’m not sure,” Harry answers. “They’re all such lovely people, but I’m not sure we’ve really clicked with anyone yet.” He looks to Louis who is nodding in agreement.
“Did you guys meet Rachel or Y/N?” Emily asks.
“I don’t think so, no,” Louis replies.
“I really think you’d get along well with both of them. Is it alright if I have them come here to introduce you?”
“Yes, that’d be fine with us,” Harry says.
Emily steps out and comes back a few minutes later, a woman in her late twenties following behind. “This is Rachel,” she says.
“Hello sirs,” says Rachel with a smile. “It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
“Likewise,” says Louis before he and Harry introduce themselves to her. They spend a few minutes talking, observing her demeanor and learning a bit about her. After a little while Emily leads Rachel out to lead her back to the dayroom.
“She seems nice,” Louis says.
“I agree. I could see her as part of our family.”
They don’t have time to discuss more, as Emily is now back with another girl. She’s younger, probably early twenties, and definitely more shy. She keeps her head bowed, not making eye contact with any of the doms in the room.
“Y/N, can you say hello to these gentlemen?” Emily says.
She looks up, and Harry and Louis offer her an encouraging smile.
“Hello sirs,” she says in a timid voice. Her hands are clasped behind her back, another physical sign of submission, but they can tell she’s picking at her nails nervously.
“I’m Louis, and this is my husband Harry. Would you like to take a seat?”
Her eyes dart between the three others, as though unsure what she should do. Emily finally says, “Y/N, take a seat on the couch.” It’s said gently, but firmly, a clear command, and Y/N quickly does as she’s told.
She sits on one end, glancing over at the two men and seeing their kind smiles. Harry and Louis ask her some basic questions, and after a few minutes she leaves the room.
“She’s quite shy,” Louis remarks once she’s left.
“Do you remember the girl I mentioned that day at Sarah’s? With all the dom siblings?” Emily asks.
It clicks together in Louis' brain and he says, “That’s her?”
“It is,” she replies.
“I’m sorry, what is her story?” Harry asks. Emily tells the story again, and by the end, Harry’s eyes are swimming with tears.
“Why don’t you boys take some time to think it over?” Emily suggests.
Harry shakes his head and says, “Lou, I want to help her. I want to give Y/N a safe home. I really think we can do it, we can show her what it’s like to be loved.”
Louis looks at the determination in his husband's eyes and takes a deep breath. “I think we can, too. It won’t be easy, not with everything she’s been through, but I believe we will do everything we can to help her heal.”
“So, Y/N is the one?” Emily asks.
“She is,” Harry replies, Louis nodding beside him.