Can I Eat Your Banana?

by juno_isthesillyest

Summary:

Vince x Kevin....

Notes:

Uh yea...

Chapter 1

Notes:

Creds to:
Me, twig_the_silly, blondgayboys
This is a joke!!

The yellow minion trekked into the restaurant, in fancy attire. He went to France to steal the eiffel tower for his boss, Gru. That's when he saw the chef. He was emo and looked like he hadn't slept in days.

"Woah, the chef is hot!" Kevin strutted towards the chef and inquired the following: "Hey, sir, you single?"

"No, I'm dating the road,” The attractive chef replied, irate from this yellow creature.

Kevin was shattered—he wasn’t single? Did that mean, Kevin had unquestionably no chance of dating him?

“Oh… okay,” Kevin replied, tears welling up in his eyes. “Sorry for bothering you, then.”

Vincent wasn’t usually the type to feel empathy for anyone, but this was different. He felt something for the yellow creature, something that stabbed his brain. He wanted the yellow creature, not for romantic pleasure, but instead to consume. The thought of consuming this yellow thing clawed inside his brain. He CRAVED this minion.

“But Vincent…I wanna get you pregnant.” Kevin exclaimed, passion amidst his way of words

\; he truly wanted to get the emo chef pregnant.

“My house is upstairs~” The emo chef lustily replied, sharing the same passion as Kevin for this mpreg fantasy.

“What about Road?”

“...I killed him. He's dead. I just lied.”

Chapter 2: Woah...

Summary:

...

“What about Road?”

“...I killed him. He's dead. I just lied.”

Vincent knew that he had to get pregnant immediately, albeit, he still had a shift to continue doing. He did not give a shit and instead heedlessly scooped up the minion, jolting towards the upstairs where his room rested.

“Woah big emo dude, you’re so strong!” Kevin remarked, followed by multiple giggles that he was trying to secrete from Vincent which failed miserably.

They got on the bed, naked. “So who's top?” Kevin asked, finally suspending the giggles that Vincent found very attractive and sexy.

“I.. uhm,” Vincent hesitantly muttered, “Can you be top?”

“I was hoping you'd say that!” Kevin said, grinning enthusiastically as he knew his fantasies would actually transpire.

Vincent shifted his head away shyly, whispering his next request. “And, um, can you make it as if you're eating me out in a passenger seat?”

“Of course, vampire looking boy.” the minion said as he took his underwear off.

Just seeing how long it was made Vincent moan and cream.

“Do you like it, little boy? It’s 39 inches!” Vincent nodded desperately to Kevin’s seductive question. “Alright, let me put it in.” The minion began putting his 39 inches into Vince's butt.

“It hurts…” Vincent muttered, the pleasure and lust enhancing as Kevin went deeper and deeper.

“Can I go faster?” The minion asked.

“Hey Vincent, where are you?” Someone said as they walked around the house.

“Dad, not now!!” Vincent yelled.

Chapter 3: What?

Summary:

...

“Dad, not now!!” Vincent yelled.

“Your dad?...maybe we should stop for now..” Kevin said.

And his dad walked in! Oh shit his dad walked in…

“Wait…you're dad…he- he's that architect…Kaveh no last name?!” Kevin exclaimed, his facial expression representing the same one as Kaveh.

“I'm back from architectin- VINCENT, WHAT THE HELL?!?!?!” Kaveh said with his jaw dropped.

“DAD! I AM SORRY!!!” Vincent screamed, ear piercing to Kevin who stared in shock.

“I’m unbe borning you!!” Kaveh yelled.

“N-No! P-P-Please dad..no…” Vince said in a British accent.

“Yeah, please don't take my d–d-daddy away.” Kevin said. “Baby girl…” Kevin said looking at Vincent.

“I'm leaving. I’m telling Alhaitham this.”

“WAIT NO! HE IS THE BETTER DAD-” He didn't mean to say it but he certainly meant it.

“WHAT?!?!? Never in my 10 years of writing on the wall have I EVER heard something that stupid. I'm MORE better than that CUNT! OK?! He is literally so infuriating, like sure he is smart and like a genius but he literally has such a bad temper, like he might SEEM friendly and likable but he just isn't. Plus his personality is way too big bro.” He started hallucinating. “HOW DO YOU GUYS NOT KNOW THE SQUARE ROOT OF 45 IT'S SO EASY, LIKE WHAT?!??” He was hallucinating that he was a math teacher. “LIKE I CAN DO THAT IN MY HEAD, WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU GUYS, WHY HAVE YOU GOTTEN DUMBER?!?!? BACK IN MY DAYS EVERYONE KNEW THE SQUARE ROOT OF EVERYTHING. I HAVE FAILED AS A MATH TEACHER, I GUESS..?!????!!”

“Dad, what the fuck?” Vince uttered coldly. “Get out of here, stop ruining my life!”

Kaveh sighed, looking like he was gonna cry. “...okay kiddo..sorry.” He suddenly got a call, that's weird, at this hour? It was 11 PM and he was getting a call from none other than, “Br-Bram? Why is Bram calling me?” He picked it up. “Bram? Hello? Oh hii Bram's husband, Kunikida!!! Where's Bram? HIS WATER BROKE?”

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed the first chapter!