Chapter Text
The season opens on OJ, the winner of season 1, walking back to the hotel he made with his money with groceries. Yeah, great times. Once he steps inside, we see all the season 1 contestants partying it up! Well, most of them. Namely, Paper, Pickle, Apple, Marshmallow, Bomb, Paintbrush, Salt, Pepper, Lightbulb, Nickel, Knife and Baseball. Some are gaming, Salt is exercising, and the others are just dancing however they want. OJ sets his groceries down, then is greeted by Apple.
Apple: “Hey, OJ! It's so nice not to be on Idiotic Island after you rescued me!”
OJ: “Well, I’m glad the million was put toward something we can all enjoy!”
Marshmallow: “I would enjoy it… y’know, if Apple was still gone!”
This pissed Apple off, so she threw a glass at her, knocking her out and breaking the cup.
Apple: “That’s better!”
OJ: “Jeez, Apple, after being isolated for so many months, I thought you’d be warmed up to Marshmallow by now.”
Apple: “Oh, I’ll warm her up alright!”
She lights a match and gets ready to throw it onto Marshmallow’s body before OJ stops her.
OJ: “How many times do I have to tell you guys: No fires in the hotel!”
Lightbulb: “Aw…”
Lightbulb disappointedly puts down her lit match. We then see some graffiti on the wall defacing OJ, though who did it isn’t seen.
OJ: “And stop putting graffiti on the walls.”
We then cut to the gamers, Knife and Pickle.
Pickle: “Hey, you can’t just jump on them, you have to shoot them!”
Knife: “Shoot this!”
A death jingle plays on the screen, as Pickle falls into mild shock.
Pickle: “Man, you killed me!”
A knock on the front door is heard, and OJ opens it to greet Balloon.
Balloon: “OJ, buddy-!”
OJ: “Balloon, how many times do I have to tell you? You’re not allowed in here!”
Balloon: “Well, you don’t really have a choi-!”
He gets the door slammed in his face. We then see Lightbulb and Baseball at the snack table, Lightbulb eating a cookie while Baseball is concerned.
Baseball: “Lightbulb, stop! You’ve eaten, like, fifty cookies already!”
Lightbulb: (gulp) “Actually, I’ve eaten like, 53, and-”
She retches before we cut to the condiment twin-like friends. Salt is on the treadmill, while Pepper's off to the side.
Salt: “How’s my, like, time?”
Pepper: “Wait, I was supposed to be counting?”
We hear Lightbulb vomit, followed by Baseball screaming.
Salt: “Whatever, I’m getting a cookie."
Baseball walks in, covered in barf.
Baseball: “Don’t. You. Dare.”
The scene transitions from night to day, the moon setting quickly to make way for the blue sky. Nickel brings in multiple envelopes.
Nickel: “Mail’s here!”
Knife comes out of nowhere and grabs the top letter.
Knife: “Give me those! …Another note from Taco.”
Pickle: “Ugh, I don’t need her pity, just throw it in the fire.”
Just then, a plane flies by the hotel, which alerts OJ and Bomb.
OJ: “Huh?”
Bomb overreacts, screaming and jumping into OJ’s arms.
Baseball: “Guys, what’s happening?”
Paintbrush: “I think that’s a… plane?”
Nickel: “Thanks, Mr. Obvious. I think…”
Lightbulb: “You mean Mrs. Obvious? Oh, nah, nah, nah, I’m just playin’, I really have no clue.”
Paintbrush looks at her, unimpressed.
Baseball: “Well, let’s go and see who it is.”
The scene cuts to all the veterans outside the hotel, OJ looking around to see who’s on the plane… which is MePhone4, their old host! He jumps off the plane, hoping his parachute deploys in time… he hits the ground. Then his parachute deploys. Surprisingly, he’s none the worse for wear.
OJ: “...um, hi?”
MePhone4 quickly gets up and greets OJ back.
MePhone4: “Greetings and salutations!”
Balloon: “Uh…”
Everyone else seems just as confused.
MePhone4: “Well, it's great to see you too. I see you’ve done something impressive with your prize, OJ.”
OJ: “Thanks!”
MePhone4: “And since we last saw each other, Adam agreed to let me have a personal assistant for the second season. I was told I’d meet him here.”
A toilet then hops in from the right.
Toilet: “Hello, is there a Mistah Phone here?”
MePhone4 looks at him in what can only be described as disgusted shock.
Toilet: “Hello, sir, are you the Mistah Phone I was told to assist by Master Adam?”
MePhone calls up Adam to ask him about his new… help.
MePhone4: “Adam, what is this… thing?”
Adam: “I’m guessing you’re referring to your new assistant. That is Toilet. We couldn’t really find anyone else who wanted to assist you for some reason, weird, huh? So, yeah, there you go.”
As Adam talks, Toilet slides up to MePhone.
MePhone4: “You can’t be serious!”
Adam then hangs up.
MePhone4: “Hello? Helloo?”
Toilet: “Hello?”
Paper: “Uh, why are you here again?”
MePhone4: “Oh, right, well, it’s been two years since Inanimate Insanity was released. Cool, right?”
Balloon: “No, not really.”
Marshmallow: “Is that the only reason you flew here? Pretty terrible reason…”
MePhone4: “Actually, it’s not! Inanimate Insanity Season 2 is happening right here!”
OJ: “No it’s not, my winning hotel is here. And I’m telling you, it’s not going anywhere.”
The plane then crashes into the hotel, causing OJ to scream so high, he shatters himself. The 11 season 2 newbies fall out of the luggage compartment, landing harshly onto the ground. Well, Cherries just lands on top of the pile simply. The others are Box, Cheesy, Fan, Microphone, Soap, Suitcase, Test Tube, Trophy, Tissues, and Yin-Yang.
MePhone4: “And these are the new stereotypes. …uhh, I- I mean, the season 2 contestants!”
A space heater then falls out of the same compartment, landing on the ground face-first.
MePhone4: “Huh? Who are you?”
Heater: “Oh, uh, I- I’m Heater! I snuck onto the plane, um… c- can I join the game, please?”
MePhone4 takes a bit to answer this, making Heater nervous. But then, he smiles.
MePhone4: “Sure, why not. Not only did you say “please,” but one more contestant can’t hurt.”
Heater: “Yay!”
Lightbulb: “Aw, so you’re replacing us with them? Really?”
Right Cherry: “What’s wrong with us?”
Cheesy: “Yeah, that wasn’t a very bright thing to say! Hehe, get it?”
Left Cherry: “Heheh, nice one!”
Heater chuckles too, but when Cheesy gives him a smile, Heater shies away under the attention, confusing Cheesy. Lightbulb scoffs.
MePhone4: “Okay, let’s get to it. I want some of you, the old contestants, to join the game and battle alongside them. So check out this slot machine! Eight of you will join the game, and it will be decided by chance.”
Toilet: “Ooh, ooh, sir, can I pull the lever?”
MePhone4: “No, don’t touch it, you filthy-! Uh, I- I mean, uh, can you run and get me some, uh… some wires?”
Toilet: “Sure thing, Mistah Phone!”
MePhone4: “It’s MePhone! Ugh…”
He then pulls the lever, activating the slot machine and spinning the columns before it lands on Paintbrush, making them the first pick for the veterans.
MePhone4: “Paintbrush, welcome to Season 2. Have anything to say?”
Paintbrush: “Um, well, actually, I had a question about-”
MePhone4: “Okay, let’s not waste any time.”
He kicks them over to the others before rolling again.
Lightbulb: “It has to land on me!”
It does not, instead landing on Knife!
Knife: “Yeah!”
Lightbulb: “Is that-? Oh wait, that’s not me, darn…”
MePhone4: “Knife, welcome!”
The slots spin again.
Lightbulb: “It has to land on me !”
Nickel: “You already said that, I just hope it doesn’t-”
The slots land on Nickel.
Nickel: “-land on me… meh.”
Lightbulb makes a weird face and sound.
MePhone4: “Nickel, congrats.”
The slot machine rolls again, and Lightbulb tries to say her sitch again before Balloon smacks her.
Balloon: “No!”
Yes, it does! Lightbulb is the fourth pick for season 2. Lightbulb giggles gleefully as she walks over.
MePhone4: “Lightbulb, you get to-”
Lightbulb: “Yeah, yeah…”
MePhone4: “Four spots left!”
The slots roll again, and land on… Bow, to which a horror sting plays.
MePhone4: “Bow?! Great, another season with you. Oh wait, you’re dead!”
He happily spins the slots again, uncaring of his least favorite contestant’s demise. The fifth pick for the season is the least favorite among the cast: Balloon.
Balloon: “Yes! I can’t believe it!”
Everyone is shocked at Balloon’s new lines.
Salt: “Like, OMG, you like, actually talked.”
Balloon: “Well, now that I’ve joined the season, I figured I might as well start saying actual stuff again!”
Salt: “But, like, nobody, like, likes you, like.”
Balloon: “That’s not true!”
Toilet returns with the wires.
Toilet: “Here’s those wires you needed, Mistah Phone- Oh my gosh, Balloon, nobody likes you!”
Balloon: “Oh come on!”
The slots roll again, and land on Marshmallow.
Marshmallow: “Yay!”
Apple: “Great, now I won’t have to deal with you anymore!”
The slot machine proves her wrong, selecting her next.
Apple: “What?! Can I quit?”
MePhone4: “No.”
He prepares to toss her, but-
Apple: “But before you fling me, just tell me what “quit” means!”
He ignores her and throws her anyways, before turning back to the final 9 veterans.
MePhone4: “This is the final spot.”
The slot machine rolls one last time, and it lands on… Baseball!
Baseball: “Oh good, I really didn’t get to do much last season, now I can finally really compete!”
MePhone4: “That’s our season 2 cast.”
Paper: “But our season 1 winner is still dead!”
MePhone4: “Oh, yeah, well, let’s bring him back.”
MePhone opens up the MeLife application, and presses OJ’s icon, bringing him back in an orange silhouette, before it drains up to his real form.
Fan: “So that’s how it works!”
OJ: “Wha? What happened?”
Paper: “We didn’t make season 2!”
OJ: “Oh well, I don’t really have a reason to be in season 2. I mean, I did win season 1, so obviously I don’t need to be in season 2.”
He walks back to his crashed hotel as he continues speaking.
OJ: “It’s fine anyways, we can all chill in my awe- SUM- HO-TAH! What happened ?!”
Salt: “It’s okay, OJ. Now we have plenty of time to fix up the hotel together, forever .”
OJ yells out as he’s taken away, while Test Tube looks around.
Test Tube: “This seems rather peculiar, I’ve never been on a competition before.”
Trophy: “Let’s just get to the contest, so I can dream these chumps and take the million.”
Lightbulb: (whispering to PB) “Wow, why is he saying that? Everyone knows the mean characters get out first.”
Paintbrush: “Mm-hm, girl.”
We then get a shot of the contestants in the background, with MePhone4 front and center.
MePhone4: “Anyway, 20 contestants, 1 million dollars… this is Inanimate Insanity 2.”
Then the intro plays, little slots showcasing the 20 contestants in random order, before we see everyone on a platform made of ice. The logo pops out soon after. Then, we get to see some of the newbies, especially Mic… and what she can do.
Microphone: “SO, WHAT’S THE CHALLENGE?”
As she speaks, she blows a few people away.
Suitcase: “Ow! Mic, turn down the volume!”
She presses her power button, turning off her volume.
Microphone: “Sorry, that happens sometimes…”
Toilet: “Mistah Phone, I got your wires.”
MePhone4: “These are just strings of half-eaten spaghetti.”
Toilet: “Oh, sorry, sir, I didn’t have my lunch break.”
MePhone4: “Since when did Adam give us lunch breaks?”
We cut to the veterans just standing around.
Apple: “So I wonder what the new contestants are doing!”
We cut to see both groups far away from each other. For some reason.
Paintbrush: “Hi there!”
They get slapped by Lightbulb.
Lightbulb: “Stranger danger!”
Mic runs over to officially greet them.
Microphone: “Well, let’s change that. I’m Microphone, and as you can see, I am a microphone! And you must be Paintbrush and Lightbulb!”
She points to each of them as she says their names, and Lightbulb whispers to Paintbrush again.
Lightbulb: “Wow, how did she know that?”
MePhone4: “Okay, okay, you guys really need to socialize! So let’s do some icebreakers.”
Knife: “Yeah! My fist can break the ice like butter!”
Trophy: “Like those pillows you call fists will break anything.”
Tissues: (sniff) “Guys, I don’t think that’s what he meant.”
He then violently sneezes all over Trophy.
Trophy: “Gross, man!”
Tissues: “Sorry, it’s my condi-shawn…”
Soap slides in and wipes down Trophy’s side.
Soap: “Ew, germs! We must eliminate them at all costs!”
She then laughs creepily, making an equally creepy face.
Nickel: “Neat freak…”
Test Tube: “Guys, icebreakers is a relative term for a way of bonding for two people that have never met.”
MePhone4: “Yes, and I would have said that if you all didn’t interrupt me.”
Fan: “I didn’t interrupt you, I’m your biggest fan!”
Cheesy: “He’s a fan, get it?”
Right Cherry: “Okay, that’s not funny.”
Heater: “...I- I thought it was a little funny…”
Marshmallow: “So what fun game are we going to play to get to know each other?”
MePhone4: “Oh, well, I literally meant icebreakers. We’re headed over to Glastonian Glacier.”
Marshmallow: “Never heard of it…”
MePhone4: “Well, now you have!”
We cut to the contestants on the ground in the back, with the glacier floating on a lake.
Test Tube: “This doesn’t apply to the definition I just explained…”
MePhone4: “Your first challenge is to be the last one on the glacier. All pushing, shoving, kicking, and horseplay is especially allowed.”
Trophy: “Horseplay is my middle name.”
Tissues: “That’s an odd middle name.”
Toilet: “Mistah Phone!”
MePhone4: “Everyone, shut up!”
Beat.
Toilet: “Mistah Pho-”
MePhone4: “Let’s find out who the winner of the first challenge will be! Get set, on your mark, go!”
We immediately see Heater start silently freaking out, covering himself with his arms to make himself smaller, not liking the amount of strangers close to him.
Paintbrush: “First things first.”
Balloon is then killed.
Paintbrush: “There we go!”
We then see Yin-Yang for the first time, and he… they , can’t decide where to move.
Yang: “I think we need to move over more to the left.”
Yin: “No! We should move over to the right!”
Yang: “Augh, I hate you!”
Yin: “I hate you, too!”
Yang then punches Yin in the eye. We then see Soap moments before disaster strikes.
Soap: “Scrubbing, scrubbing, all day long!”
She giggles again before being knocked off by Yin-Yang, who also just walks off like an idiot. We then see Tissues, Trophy, and Heater’s close by.
Trophy: “Um, Trophy Horseplay, I think we should, like, form an alliance.”
Heater: “I- I’d like that-”
Trophy: “Yeah, and I think, like, you should die.”
He then kicks him off, causing Heater to walk away terrified.
Trophy: “I’d rather form an alliance with Mr. Sharp Guy over there. You seem tough.”
He gestures to Knife before he walks up to him.
Knife: “Nope, I’m not interested.”
Trophy: “Ex cuse me?”
Knife: “Sorry, but you and I are quite… different.”
Trophy: “Um, how, we’re both jocks.”
Knife: “No, you’re a jock, and I’m a jerk. Big difference.”
Trophy: “Fine, we’ll settle this like men, with the ultimate-”
He gets one-punched by Knife before falling into the water. While this was happening though, Fan approached Lightbulb, who was holding her breath.
Fan: “Um, are you okay?”
Lightbulb: “Of course, I’m just following the rules of object shows! As long as I’m not mean to anybody, or interact with anything, I’ll be safe- OMGA, you made me interact with you! What do I do ?!”
She decides what to do… by smacking him off the glacier. A few seconds before Trophy was, might I add, this will be important later. Baseball approaches Nickel.
Baseball: “Hey, Nickel!”
Nickel: “AHH! Don’t push me off!”
Baseball: “No, I- I wasn’t going to do that! I was just going to say that we have to form an alliance! I mean, OJ and Taco made it so far last season with that method! I think it would be smart if we did that too!”
Nickel: “How original !”
Baseball: “I KNOW! Anyways, two people isn’t going to cut it.”
Cheesy: “Wow, that idea really hits out of the park! Any way I can join?”
Nickel: (sigh) “Of course you can. But in order to join, you have to look in the opposite direction.”
Cheesy turns around as Baseball and Nickel nod to each other, BB preparing to kick him off.
Cheesy: “Wow, that idea’s- oh, hey Heater.”
Heater: “Look out!”
He yanks Cheesy out of Baseball’s kicking range, causing them to slide along the ice.
Heater: “Oh yeah, ice is slippery…”
Test Tube: “Wow, this water seems to be near freezing! My approximation would be… 33 degrees Fahrenheit.”
Knife walks up annoyedly.
Knife: “We didn’t ask for a chemistry lesson!”
He kicks her off, sending her flying through the air.
Test Tube: “Science rules!”
She then ends up in the water, eliminating her from the challenge. Box just sits there motionless, before Lightbulb looks over to it.
Lightbulb: “Wow, you’re really good at this… non-interacting thing. How do you pull it off?”
The shot focuses on Box for a few moments.
Lightbulb: “A true master indeed.”
She looks around, before Lightbulb just ends up kicking it into the water. Apple and Marshmallow meet again.
Apple: “Marshmallow, you’re so getting out!”
Marshmallow: “Well, you’re so getting in !”
She punches the fruit right into the water. Knife then walks up to Baseball, planning on getting an easy out.
Knife: “Baseball, I’m sorry. But I’m gonna have to push you off.”
Baseball: “Uh, okay?”
Knife tries to shove him, but apparently, the ice decides to ignore physics for a few moments, because not only does Baseball not move, but Knife just walks in place as if he’s trying to shove him on the actual ground.
Knife: “No fair! Your fatness is too much to handle!”
This sets Baseball off, though it doesn’t look like it at first as he just breathes in, and out. Then he takes action.
Baseball: “I’M! NOT! FAT !”
He kicks Knife right off the glacier and into the water, before breathing heavily. He then turns to Nickel as if nothing happened.
Baseball: “So who’s going to join our alliance now?”
Heater and Cheesy slow down their journey by Heater digging his heels into the ice, though he loses his grip on Cheesy, causing them to bump together before they get up.
Cheesy: “Woah, buddy, if you wanted a kiss, you should’ve just asked! We did just meet, after all.”
This just causes Heater to freeze up and activate in flusterment.
Cheesy: “...Heater?”
He falls on his face and melts a hole through the ice, knocking him out. Cheesy looks away, feeling bad, before walking away. Suitcase then slides up to the round duo.
Suitcase: “Hi! I’m sorry Knife was so mean to you, but I’ll join your alliance!”
Nickel: “Hmm… I’m trying to find something wrong with you. Gimme a second.”
Suitcase just glares at him angrily.
Baseball: “Yeah, well, you’re armless just like us. I think you’re the perfect candidate!”
Suitcase: “Alright!”
Nickel: “Yay for social cliques.”
Left Cherry: “You won’t push me off, will you?”
Right Cherry: “Of course not. But what about that thing?”
They point to Paintbrush, who Left is quickly disgusted by for whatever reason.
Left Cherry: “…ew, what is that thing?”
Paintbrush: “Uh…”
They back away from the Cherries, ending up bumping into Microphone, activating her sound-emphasizing and causing her to scream, launching everyone that wasn’t her, Lightbulb, and Baseball into the water. The order they fall in is Nickel, Marshmallow, Suitcase, Cheesy, Paintbrush, and Cherries.
Lightbulb: “Wow, my plan is working perfectly! …oh, um…”
We pan out to see Lightbulb and Baseball on opposite ends of the now-breaking glacier, with Mic right in the middle.
Microphone: “Oh no…”
She falls into the crack, which ends up electrocuting her to death. Lightbulb tries to reach over and get Baseball, but she fails. Of course.
Lightbulb: “Baseball, this is going to be kind of… hard to win now! I can’t reach!”
Baseball: “What a coincidence, I can’t either.”
MePhone4: “Well, the ice has been broken. I think you two have just earned the spot of team captains.”
Lightbulb: “Yeaaaah!”
Baseball: “Can I choose the teams first?”
Lightbulb: “OMGA, I think not .”
MePhone4: “Actually, we’re selecting the teams based on the order you all got out in the challenge. The odd numbers are on Baseball’s team, and the even numbers are on Lightbulb’s team.”
Baseball’s team consists of him, Microphone, Paintbrush, Suitcase, Nickel, Knife, Box, Trophy, Tissues, and Soap. Lightbulb’s team consists of her, Cherries, Cheesy, Marshmallow, Heater, Apple, Test Tube, Fan, Yin-Yang, and Balloon.
Knife: “Nice, we have Paintbrush on our team! She’s tall, she could come in handy.”
Nickel: “Paintbrush is a girl?”
Paintbrush: “Yeah! I’m on this team.”
Baseball: “Wow, this all happened so fast! Hi, Team Baseball!”
Nickel: “Uh, why is it Team Baseball? That kinda contradicts the team dynamic, y’know?”
MePhone4: “Okay, you both can choose a team name.”
Lightbulb: “Just because we’re so epic, how about Team Ep-”
Marshmallow: “NO! We are not being called Team Epic again!”
Lightbulb: “Fine. Hmm… well, just because we’re so bright-”
Cheesy slaps his knee.
Lightbulb: “And, because we light up this game-”
Another Cheesy knee slap.
Lightbulb: “We should be the Bright Lights!”
He slaps a third time.
MePhone4: “You’re the Bright Lights.”
Baseball: “Since we’re gonna knock this competition out of the park-”
Cheesy slides over to slap his knee again.
Baseball: “We should be the Grand Slams!”
One last knee slap.
Cheesy: “...Ow!”
MePhone4: “You’re the Grand Slams. Anyway, the first team challenge is a friendly game of dodgeball.”
Tissues: “But I’m so tired! And my condi-shawn is getting worse!”
He sneezes right onto Soap, who screams and runs away.
MePhone4: “Each team gets dodgeballs. If you hit a player on the opposite team, they are out. However, if they catch it, you are out.”
Nickel: “Well, no arms is gonna make it easy to catch them…”
MePhone4: “So, go! Now!”
Paintbrush: “First things first!”
They kick a ball directly into Balloon, eliminating him first once more.
Paintbrush: “There we go!”
Trophy: “Just give all the balls to me!”
Cheesy: “You’d like that, wouldn’t you?”
Heater: “Don’t go there, Cheesy.”
Trophy: “You cheesy twerp!”
Cheesy then got smacked right in the face with a dodgeball, causing Heater to back away from the frontlines.
Right Cherry: “Hey! Jerk!”
They try throwing a ball at Trophy, who catches it with ease.
Trophy: “Sorry, I’m actually, oh what did Knife say again…? A jock .”
Yang: “Goodbye!”
Trophy, being distracted, did not have the reaction time needed to dodge the ball flying at his face, so he was then knocked out himself. Baseball attempts to kick a ball at Lightbulb, but she catches it.
Lightbulb: “Pretty cool, right? They’re called arms!”
Baseball lets out a sound of offense as Nickel tries hitting someone. Heater then manages to catch it.
Heater: “Oh wow, I actually caught it!”
Nickel: “Feh…”
Suitcase: “Oh no, my alliance is gone! I’ll avenge them by following in their footsteps!”
She kicks a ball at Test Tube, and guess what happens.
Test Tube: “ARMS!”
Suitcase: “Well, that was unexpected…”
Soap: “Guys, these dodgeballs are so dirty! What if we get a disease?!”
Knife: “I’m… pretty sure that won’t happen.”
Soap: “Step aside, man, let the professional handle this.”
She scrubs down the ball she picked up, before throwing it at Apple, knocking her out. The ball landed right next to Marshmallow.
Marshmallow: “Nice shot!”
Soap: “Thanks, you really think it was?”
She gets knocked out by Marsh before screaming. Tissues picks up a ball before starting to wheeze.
Tissues: “Uh oh…”
He violently sneezes, rocketing the ball out of his hands and into Marshmallow…’s hands.
Marshmallow: “Sorry, buddy.”
Tissues: “Aw, man…”
We cut to Fan and Marshmallow on the other team.
Fan: “Marshmallow, there’s something I’ve always wanted to ask you!”
Marshmallow: “Not the best time, Fan…”
Fan: “Oh, just real quick! Why don’t you use your time machine and-”
Marshmallow: “LOOK OUT!”
They do not, instead both getting hit by dodgeballs.
Yin: “Alright, who should I throw at next?”
Yang: “You?! I should be the one to throw it! I got out Trophy!”
Yin: “Yes, so now it’s my turn!”
Yang: “You idiot, I’m the thrower!”
As they continue to argue, a ball rolls up to Heater’s feet, so he picks it up and, seeing that Box is just… there… He walks up and throws it at Box, eliminating it. He then walks back to the corner he was standing in before.
Lightbulb: “Hey, nice trick! Backing away from the frontlines so they don’t target you! Where’d you learn that?”
Heater: “Oh, it was something my brother always did when he played this game.”
Lightbulb: “Cool.”
Knife: “Alright, guys, it’s three to four, so-”
Yang yells out before hitting himself, knocking him out.
Knife: “...nevermind. Still, we gotta try and take them down, mano a mano .”
Microphone: “I have an idea!”
She turns her volume up and just yells, deafening everyone that wasn’t her.
Paintbrush: “Ow! What did that do?”
Knife: “All it did was make me deaf!”
Test Tube: “Quick, let’s get them!”
Paintbrush: “Huh?”
Paintbrush and Knife both get knocked out by a shot, and another flies past Microphone. Lightbulb looks over to Heater, confused.
Heater: “I- I’m not a great shot…”
Microphone: “Oh no, everybody on my team’s out!”
She presses her power button again.
Microphone: “Except me!”
She yells once again, this time throwing two dodgeballs into the air. While the other team regains their bearings, the two hit Test Tube and Lightbulb before Heater tries to back up, only to back into the impact zone, eliminating the last Bright Light from the challenge.
MePhone4: “Wow, what a ‘macro’ win for a ‘Micro’ phone.”
Cheesy gets up into the lens and slaps his knee.
MePhone4: “So, one of the Bright Lights is going home, viewers. Vote for one member of the Bright Lights to be eliminated, but do not vote in the comments!”
Suddenly, the episode slows down and goes monochrome as MePhone4 remains the same.
MePhone4: “In fact, don’t vote at all! This is just a what-if fic, not the actual episode. We’re using the canon vote totals for these viewer voting eliminations up until episode 9. Sorry! Maybe if we get enough want for it, we could do a poll for who you guys predict is going to be eliminated in the following episode, but not this time. Alright, see you around.”
The voting screen goes back to normal, then the credits roll.
Afterwards, we see Paper on a step-ladder, leaning away from the side of the hotel.
Paper: “Alright, I think every window should be repaired!”
A stray dodgeball undoes that by breaking a window, causing Paper to let out a disappointed “Oh…” The episode then ends.
Notes:
Hope you guys enjoyed the first episode! Fun fact: I actually have a whole slideshow outlining the season, so I'm not going into this blind! Also here are the teams for the whole season.
Grand Slams: Baseball, Microphone, Paintbrush, Suitcase, Nickel, Knife, Box, Trophy, Tissues, Soap
Bright Lights: Lightbulb, Cherries, Cheesy, Marshmallow, Heater, Apple, Test Tube, Fan, Yin-Yang, Balloon
Chapter 2: Marred Marsh-ian
Summary:
After the Lights lose a member, the contestants have to save Marshmallow from Mars!
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Soap is seen scrubbing rocks for whatever foolish reason as Cherries walks up to her to start the episode off.
Right Cherry: “Hey, Soap. Want to hear a joke?”
Soap: “Sure, as long as it isn’t a dirty one.”
Cheesy then runs up to the two of them, clearly out of breath, before slapping his knee and walking away tiredly. Then the Cherries pull out masks of Apple and Marshmallow.
Left Cherry: (as Apple) “Hey, Marshmallow! I think you’re really stupid!”
Right Cherry: (as Marshmallow) “Well, you’re really really stupid!”
Left Cherry: (as Apple) “Oh no, you didn’t!”
Soap: “Ha! It’s funny ‘cause they’re immature.”
Marshmallow then walks up to them, clearly annoyed by what she heard from afar.
Marshmallow: “Hey! You forgot Apple’s horrifyingly raspy voice.”
Apple: “And Marshmallow’s voice didn’t shatter any glass!”
Marshmallow: “ Hey! ”
Somehow, Test Tube shatters from this, despite Marsh’s voice not being that high. At least to viewers.
Soap: “Hey, that joke wasn’t clean! Look at all this glass! Shameful.”
She then tries to scrub the shards, to no avail. The Cherries throw down their masks in annoyance, as the left one rants and the right one uses what would be their body language.
Left Cherry: “Thanks a lot! I spent a lot of time on that gag!”
They then march off, and Marshmallow picks up her rival’s mask.
Marshmallow: “I’m Apple! I’m severely premature, and I have the IQ of a doorknob!”
Apple retaliates by picking up Marsh’s mask and imitating her.
Apple: “I’m Marshmallow! I ruin holidays for people, because, you know, it’s SO HILARIOUS!”
Marshmallow: “I do not…”
She suddenly had kawaii eyes for whatever reason.
Apple: “Do too! You ruined Christmas for me! Why do you think I hate you, anyway?”
Marshmallow: “Oh… I never realized that was the reason you're so upset. Paintbrush and I never meant to hurt you, we just wanted to preserve your feelings!”
Apple: “Wait, seriously? I can't believe I've been so mad at you for that! I've been acting so spiteful, whatever that means.”
Marshmallow: “Well, we don't have to be friends, but I definitely think a truce is in order! Truce?”
Apple: “Truce!”
They shake on it at we see the Cherries hiding behind a bush, ready to cut a rope.
Left Cherry: “My gag was great! They’re gonna pay for their rude remarks!”
Right Cherry nods before the rope is cut, and Marshmallow is hit by a gigantic rock and flung into space.
Apple: “What?! Marshmallow! Who’s responsible for this?!”
Left Cherry: “Oh, it was…”
Right Cherry: “Box! I saw the whole thing with my own four eyes!”
They then look at Box apologetically before Lightbulb just walks over.
Apple: “Lightbulb! Box launched our team member into the ectosphere!”
Lightbulb: “Wat? I did not permit you to do that.”
She sighs and facepalms before picking Box up.
Lightbulb: “Looks like I have no choice! Box, you’re going to the calm-down corner.”
Apple: “W- Wow, i- isn’t that a bit harsh?”
Lightbulb: “Nothing is too harsh for this inexcusable offense. He must suffer for his actions.”
She tosses it down before walking away, and Box flops over. The intro then plays. Afterwards, we see MePhone addressing the losers of last episode.
MePhone4: “Hey, Bright Lights! Your dull performance last episode has caused you to be up for elimination.”
Cheesy slaps his knee while Heater just looks away ashamedly.
MePhone4: “Everyone ready?”
Heater: “Uh, I have a question.”
MePhone4: “Yes?”
Heater: “Do the contestants get hurt if they get eliminated?”
MePhone4: “Oh, not at all! I’ll show you how they go later, but rest assured, you’re not gonna get hurt.”
Heater: “Good, I didn’t want to get punched in the face like last season…”
MePhone4: “Anywho, let’s see who will be the first to go home this season. But first, I want to introduce you guys to our newest cast member!”
Toilet: “Oh, thank you, sir!”
MePhone4: “I can always count on him, he’s always here for me!”
Toilet: “Oh, stop it, you…”
MePhone4: “This person is also my new assistant!”
Toilet: “Oh my gosh, I-”
MePhone4: “MePad!”
Toilet goes into shock, flushing in the process.
Toilet: “Bu- But, sir…”
MePhone4: “What? He’s just here to read the elimination votes.”
Toilet: “But sir, I’m your new assistant! I should read the votes!”
MePhone4: “Right, and what kind of processor do you have?”
MePad: “I have the new A6 chip, with a quad-four dual processor.”
MePhone4: “Exactly.”
Toilet flies over to the Cherries, who now have a plethora of masks.
Toilet: “Cherries, give me a mask!”
He puts the MePad mask on. Why they had that already, we may never know.
Toilet: “I’m MePad, I’m an idiot, blughahka!”
MePad: “Not to be rude, but you should behave more professionally in your work environment.”
Toilet: “What the beans does that mean?”
MePhone4: “MePad, start the elimination!”
MePad: “Of course.”
He then teleports over to a theater stage, which is the elimination area for the season! The contestants were also teleported over. MePhone tries walking over to the stage before being interrupted.
Toilet: “Mistah Phone?”
MePhone4: “Hey, can you go get me some, uh, some wires?”
Toilet immediately brightens up upon this request.
Toilet: “Sure thing, Mistah Phone!”
He leaves for his mission as MePhone gets onto the stage.
MePhone4: “Works like a charm. Anyway we got prizes! If you know, if you’re safe, you’ll get a prize. And this month’s prizes are oatmeal raisin cookies!”
MePad: “Sir, I’m sorry, but according to the latest poll, 0% of the population like oatmeal raisin. I suggest you not make that decision again.”
Fan: “What? Oatmeal?”
Balloon: “Raisins? Ugh, gross!”
Lightbulb: “…I- I kinda like oatmeal raisin…”
Everyone looks at her disgustedly. Well, everyone besides Heater, though he doesn’t like that flavor either.
Lightbulb: “Wait, what are you guys looking at?”
Cheesy: “Man, call me when I raise a care about those!”
Heater chuckles as Cheesy slaps his knee. Then Tissues, who was watching the elimination, gets upset.
Tissues: “Guys, oatmeal raisin’s the reason for global warmings, guys!”
MePhone4: “True. Anyways, the following people are safe!”
MePad pulls up the votes, 2498 votes having been cast for the elimination. As MePhone4 lists out…
MePhone4: “Lightbulb, Fan, and Heater!”
…they’re shown to have 92, 108, and 137 votes respectively. They all caught their cookies, and Lightbulb immediately bit into hers, to the disgust of everybody else.
Lightbulb: “Mmm, I love that oatmealy raisiny taste!”
Mephone4: “So are Test Tube and Marshmallow.”
They each received 162 and 174 votes respectively. However, Marshmallow is now noticed to be missing after her cookie just hits the bleachers.
MePhone4: “Wait, what the…?”
Apple: “MePhone! Box sent Marshmallow to space !”
Right Cherry now has a telescope, looking into space.
Right Cherry: “Woah, she landed all the way on Mars.”
Left Cherry: “Yikes!”
MePhone4: “Do you guys even realize how serious this is?”
Fan: “Any more serious than oatmeal raisin?”
MePhone4: “Marshmallow is in space!”
Test Tube: “Yeah, guys, if you studied object anatomy, you would know that objects die within an hour of being out of our atmosphere!”
MePhone4: “Yeah, but if she dies out of orbit, I won’t be able to bring her back!”
Test Tube: “Seems logical.”
MePhone4: “Well, our viewers are more important, honestly. So let’s do the elimination first.”
Heater: “WHAT?!”
Apple: “But, she could DIE!”
MePhone4: “I know, could you imagine the lawsuits? Let’s quickly get this done! Balloon and Cherries are also safe.”
They each got 191 and 283 votes each.
Balloon: “Ah, the outcast of cookies… I get ya, buddy.”
Left Cherry: “Dude, you are weird .”
The bottom three are shown: Cheesy, Yin-Yang, and Apple.
MePhone4: “You three are left. Yin-Yang, you are reckless and fight with yourself. I mean, that’s pretty weird.”
Yin: “It’s weird, I’m sorry for all the trouble we’re causing.”
Yang: “NO! I’m not! You’re just dumb ! IDIOT!”
MePhone4: “Cheesy, your jokes and knee slaps are not funny in the slightest.”
Cheesy: “I’ll have you know I always get at least one chuckle out of everyone!”
MePhone4: “And Apple, you’re really stupid. Half the words you say, you don’t even know the meaning of.”
Apple: “I’m definitionally challenged! Leave me alone!”
The spotlight that shone on each of the three that were called out disappeared.
MePhone4: “Cheesy, you’re safe.”
Cheesy: “Good thing I’m not going oat today!”
He slaps his knee before getting smacked in the face with his cookie.
MePhone4: “Apple, Yin-Yang, one of your will be the first off the show. Let’s see who it is. MePad, display the results.”
A very short dramatic reveal happens, where Apple is safe at 437 votes, and Yin-Yang is eliminated at 565 votes.
Yang: “What?! Over this idiot ?!”
He then kicks Apple harshly into the bleachers.
Cheesy: “Oh boy, a tao-in-one elimination? What are the odds?”
He once again slaps his knee as Heater chuckles much louder this time.
Apple: “Ah, thank god.”
She catches her cookie with no further fanfare.
MePhone4: “Yin-Yang, thanks for playing! Your presence was… chaotic. Alright, into the portal.”
Yin: “Huh?”
MePhone4: “The Rejection Portal. In, now!”
Yin: “This is your fault, Yang!”
Yang: “No, yours !”
Trophy: “Goodbye!”
The golden award throws a dodgeball at Yin-Yang, slamming them into the portal, Yang screaming in rage.
Trophy: “Ah, sweet justice…”
MePad: “That portal is quite effective, sir. I admire its user functionality.”
MePhone4: “MePad, we have a serious problem. Marshmallow’s in space! We can’t bring her back if she dies!”
MePad: “Wow, it’s nice you care so much for her! Workplaces function best with caring bosses behind them.”
MePhone4: “What? I don’t care about her. It’s the lawsuits! I can’t deal with any more lawsuits!”
MePad: “Well, why don’t you make the challenge to save her? That should solve the matter.”
MePhone’s eyes light up at this suggestion.
MePhone4: “MePad, you’re a genius!”
The scene then cuts to MePhone addressing the contestants with the second challenge. Cheesy, for some reason, is standing behind MePhone instead of with everyone else.
MePhone4: “Okay, guys. This challenge is gonna be out of this world!”
Cheesy then slaps his knee to emphasize the pun.
MePhone4: “Ugh! Yeah, I think they get it, Cheesy.”
Cheesy: “Just making sure!”
Heater: “I like it better when Cheesy does it…”
MePhone4: “So yeah, it’s an outer space challenge. Build a rocketship, fly to Mars, and rescue Marshmallow. But since Marsh isn’t present, someone from team Grand Slams has to sit this one out.”
Nickel: “How about you, Knife? You’re good at sitting out!”
Knife: “Sure, I guess…”
Paintbrush: “But we need materials to build the rocket!”
MePhone4: “Uh…”
MePad pushes a giant box of rocket parts to MePhone.
MePad: “Psst!”
MePhone4: “Phew, thank MePad, you’re a lifesaver!”
MePad pushes the box more with his foot, shifting the parts about in the box.
Paintbrush: “But what about the tools?”
MePhone4: “Uh, it’s called a challenge, not a blueprint. Anyway, if you don’t do it in one hour, Marshmallow will die. And you both will be up for elimination. So you better hurry.”
Suitcase: “Don’t worry, everyone! I have all the tools we need!”
She opens up to reveal building tools.
Baseball: “Wow, that should make this challenge a walk in the park!”
Cheesy: “A ballpark, he means?”
He nudges Heater before slapping his knee, causing Heater to laugh.
Cheesy: “So you’re the one chuckle I get!”
Heater: “Yeah… Hey, uh, would you… like to work with me? In an alliance?”
Cheesy: “Of course! I always appreciate a person who understands comedy.”
Heater: “Yay!”
Lightbulb: “So, uh… anybody know how to make a rocket work?”
Test Tube: “I do! I’ll need some tools though…”
Left Cherry: “I heard Suitcase had some. Heater, can you go ask to borrow them?”
Heater: “Why do I have to- eh- nevermind, I’ll just go…”
He walks off to find Suitcase, as we cut to Baseball and Nickel looking at a now finished rocket’s fin. More specifically, a sticker that states what the rocket runs on.
Baseball: “Hm, it says this spaceship runs on… ugh, lemons? Really?! I’ve had enough of those!”
Nickel: “Well, I’m great at climbing trees! C’mon!”
He climbs a nearby lemon tree as Baseball walks under him. Then a brown substance drops onto Baseball’s head.
Baseball: “Ew, Nickel, what’s this?!”
Nickel: “Oh, sorry, my chocolate bar melted again. Anyways, here’s some lemons!”
Baseball gets battered with multiple lemons.
Baseball: “URGH!”
Heater then walks up to Suitcase nervously.
Heater: “H- Hey, Suitcase, uh… can I borrow your hammer real quick?”
Suitcase: “Well o- our team needs to win, and if I give it to you, i -it lowers our chances.”
Heater: “Oh, um… alright, s- sorry for bothering you…”
As Heater starts walking away, Suitcase contemplates.
Suitcase: “Wait!”
Heater: “Huh?”
The tools get shoved into his hands.
Suitcase: “I feel sort of bad, so here, you can have them for a bit.”
Heater: “Oh, t- thank you!”
He walks back to his team as Suitcase smiles after him.
Balloon: “Alright, you got the tools!”
Heater: “Yep! Here you go, TT.”
Test Tube: “Thanks, Heater!”
She then runs off and builds the rocket within 5 seconds, impressing everyone… that was paying attention.
Balloon: “So, anything I can help with?”
Cheesy: “Don’t you know Balloon? You’re not very pop-ular! Eh?”
He nudges Heater again, but to no laughs, only an annoyed glare.
Balloon: “Look, I know I was a bit bossy, but I wasn't evil or anything! Just give me a chance!”
Heater: “Of course you can, Balloon! Guys, give Balloon another chance! He's acting so much nicer than season 1, and I believe it's genuine.”
Lightbulb: “Well, I suppose the heat guy has a good point. Okay, you can try helping again.”
Balloon: “Yes! Thank you, Heater!”
Heater: “You’re welcome…”
Test Tube: “Unfortunately, I think I already did everything regarding building the rocket.”
Balloon: “Then I volunteer to fly to Mars in it!”
Baseball: “Guys, quick, a half-hour has gone by! Let’s get this thing in the air! There’s a three-person maximum capacity, though.”
Suitcase: “I’ll do it!”
Fan is typing away at his laptop, not paying a lick of attention to the challenge going on.
Right Cherry: “Uh, what are you doing?”
Fan: “Uh, I’m observing every physical feature about you to p- put on my blog.”
Right Cherry: “Um, that’s a little weird. Anyway, aren’t you supposed to be helping, not watching?”
Fan: “Oh! I forgot! I’m just so used to watching and not competing, y’know? To make up for it, I’ll go up.”
Heater: “Sounds good.”
Baseball: “We need another volunteer.”
Soap: “May I go?”
Baseball: “Why should you? For all I know, you could spend hours just trying to scrub down the rocket!”
Soap: “I’m not that impulsive!”
Paintbrush: “Just let her go if she wants to go, we’re wasting time.”
Baseball: “Fine, why not?”
Microphone: “I’ll go too!”
Baseball: “Ow! You can if you never do that again.”
Microphone: “Sorry…”
Lightbulb: “We need a third rocketeer!”
Apple: “I’ll do anything to save her! As her new friend, I will be there for her!”
Lightbulb: “What now?”
Balloon: “We must’ve missed something. Anyways, let’s go!”
The Grand Slams take off, with Trophy and Baseball watching after them.
Trophy: “Ugh, they’re flying so slow!”
Baseball: “It’s just a perspective. It appears now they’re moving at-”
Trophy: “Shut up! You’re such a nerd! Where’s Knife, he's the only cool person here.”
Baseball sadly walks away after being called a nerd, and Trophy walks away only to find Knife with a Dora doll.
Knife: “Dora, you are my only true friend. Nobody else understands me.”
The doll then says something in Spanish that I, and clearly everyone else who transcripts this episode, is too lazy to actually try to figure out.
Trophy: “Oh… Well… Well, that’s… interesting…”
Knife: “What? Who’s there?”
Trophy then takes a picture of Knife and his toy. How embarrassing.
Trophy: “Hey Knife, look at this awesome picture! Wait ‘til everyone sees this.”
Knife: “Wait, no! Don’t show anyone that! Please! Please stop, I’ll do anything!”
Trophy stops.
Trophy: “Anything?”
Knife: “Yeah…?”
Trophy: “If you do everything I say for the rest of the competition, I’ll show no one this picture. However, if you don’t, let’s just say… no está bien. Do we have a deal?”
Knife contemplates nervously before sighing.
Knife: “Si, señor.”
Tissues then shows up by smacking into the ground, clearly having rocket-sneezed over.
Tissues: “Oh, hey Trophy Horseplay! Uh, do you… wanna reconsider my alliance deal?”
Trophy: “ Well, two servants are better than one … sure, but you gotta do everything I say for the rest of the competition.”
Tissues: “Oh, uh, alright.”
We then see Marshmallow all by her lonesome on Mars.
Marshmallow: “Hello? …is anybody there?”
Her voice echoes out into the nothingness.
Marshmallow: “Oh… great! Just great! Now I’m all alone… (gasp) Just like Apple was! Yikes! I don’t like feeling so guilty!”
The rocket from earlier touches down, freaking Marshmallow out.
Marshmallow: “AAAH! ALIENS!”
The Grand Slams volunteers pop out instead, calming her down.
Marshmallow: “(sigh) What a relief!”
Suitcase: “Hey Marshmallow, we found you! Good thing you aren’t dead!”
Marshmallow: “Gee, thanks.”
Microphone: “Yeah!”
Her especially loud voice echos out into the void a lot longer than Marsh’s.
Soap: “Woah, the gravity is really weird here…”
She’s trying to catch her rag that floated out of her hand, as Suitcase pops up.
Suitcase: “Quick, let’s go back! Try and think thin!”
They pack themselves into the rocket before taking off, passing by the opposing team, the Bright Lights. As they pop out, all that’s there is an egg.
Apple: “Guys, look! Marshmallow turned into an egg! Noooo! This is awful!”
Balloon: “No, we’re too late! I feel so bad…”
Fan: “An egg! I must update the fan blog! But there’s no service up here, aw…”
Apple: “I’ll take the egg, maybe we can bring her back. I hope. I’m sorry, Marshmallow. I wish it didn’t have to be this way.”
The Lights take off, then it cuts to Marshmallow greeting the hosts.
Marshmallow: “Yay, I’m back! Good thing to know I’m not dead in the vacuum of space!”
MePad: “Well, at least you’re back here safe and sound!”
MePhone4: “Yup, no lawsuits today!”
MePad and Marshmallow glare at him angrily.
MePhone4: “...I mean, yay, you’re healthy, woo-hoo!”
Fan and Apple are now seen on the ground.
Fan: “You mean this egg isn’t Marshmallow?”
Apple: “It isn’t?!”
She runs over to greet the real Marshmallow.
Apple: “Marshmallow! You’re OK, I’m so glad!”
Marshmallow: “Me too!”
MePhone walks over and smacks Marshmallow for no reason.
MePhone4: “And nobody cares. But here’s what does matter. You guys…”
The camera focuses on the Bright Lights.
MePhone4: “...are up for elimination, because that egg isn’t Marshmallow. Wait a minute, where’d you get that egg from anyway? Eh, y’know what? I don’t wanna know. I’ve had enough drama for today.”
MePad: “But bringing a potential lifeform from a distant planet is highly dangerous.”
Fan: “Boring. I’m keeping it. It’ll remind me that wherever I am, I can always have someone to be there for me, in my lonely hours.”
Trophy: “That’s really pathetic.”
Fan: “(sigh) Yeah…”
Toilet finally returns, battered and holding green wires.
Toilet: “Sir, sir, I got your wires! You have no idea what I went through to get these!”
MePhone4: “Toilet! Those are green wires, I wanted red ones! Go get me the right wires. Ugh, you never listen.”
Toilet: “Oh… sure thing Mistah Phone!”
MePhone4: “Anyway, team Bright Lights is up for elimination again. So viewers, vote for a Dull Light to be eliminated. Y’know, since they aren’t so bright.”
Heater: “Hey!”
Cheesy shamefully slaps his knee.
Heater: “Cheesy!”
Cheesy: “I’m sorry, I can’t help it!”
The episode once again goes gray as MePhone4 shows up again.
MePhone4: “But remember, you can’t vote on this fic for who to be eliminated. But my idea last time was pretty great, so vote in the poll in the end notes for who you think is going to be eliminated next! It’s not to eliminate, mind you, it’s to predict! The results will be shown at the beginning notes next episode. Voting ends in a week, so on December 21st. Happy predicting!”
The episode goes back to normal as the phone goes away, and the episode ends.
Notes:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1OH5ossI4CPFd4oN6CCoGZGBJ4sxsxeqKZhuUaDWdiNM/edit <- If you want to predict who goes!
Grand Slams: Baseball, Microphone, Paintbrush, Suitcase, Nickel, Knife, Box, Trophy, Tissues, Soap
Bright Lights: Lightbulb, Cherries, Cheesy, Marshmallow, Heater, Apple, Test Tube, Fan, Balloon
Eliminated: Yin-Yang
Chapter 3: Keep On Tri-ing
Summary:
One more leaves, and a triathlon commences!
Notes:
Only 2 people voted, and they both voted for Apple. Maybe a longer voting period, depending on my mood to write this, will help.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
Chapter Text
The Cherries once again start the episode out by walking up to a vending machine that’s just out in the middle of a field for whatever reason.
Left Cherry: “Man, I’m so thirsty! All this doing nothing really takes a toll on you…”
Right Cherry: “What should we pick… water or Dr. Fizz?”
Left Cherry: “Water or Dr. Fizz?”
They press the button of each option without realizing, and once they do so enough times, they get sucked into a tube extruded from the machine, right into a laboratory.
Right Cherry: “Ow… how'd we get here?”
Test Tube: “What?! How'd you find my secret laboratory?”
Left Cherry: “A secret lab? Why am I not surprised?”
Right Cherry: “Yeah, you're such a nerd!”
Test Tube: “And proud! Well, now that you're here, please just follow the science rules! Rule one, don't touch anything!”
A tapping can be heard before we cut to the Cherries tapping a glass encasing of electricity rods.
Test Tube: “Hey, stop! You'll contaminate the experiment!”
Left Cherry: “But your rules are sooo boring! Why can't we have any-”
Right Cherry was once again doing the body language, but at one point he accidentally backhanded the glass and broke it. Test Tube was mortified. Smash cut to the Cherries being thrown out the door.
Test Tube: “Some people just have no respect for the sciences…”
The intro is then played. Afterwards, we see the “alliance” of Trophy (in a lounge chair), Knife, and Tissues.
Trophy: “Hey Knife, I dropped my protein milkshake.”
Knife: “That’s fantastic .”
Trophy: “Go make me another one, slave.”
Knife: “Slave?! Who are you calling slave?! Why can’t Tissues do it?”
Trophy: “You think I trust him not to sneeze into the blender or something?”
Tissues: “Probably a good call. ACHOO!”
Trophy and Knife flinch back as Tissues is once again rocketed away by his own sneeze.
Knife: “...whatever, I’m not doing-!”
Trophy pulls the picture out from behind his back.
Knife: “Grr… chocolate or vanilla?”
Trophy: “I want Banana Blast, you idiot!”
Trophy throws the empty glass right into Knife’s face, causing him to growl as he walks off.
MePhone4: “Bright Lights, come with me to the elimination area!”
Midway through his sentence, a blender starts up. A quick pan out shows that it’s Knife making a new milkshake.
MePhone4: “Knife, do you mind not blending that milkshake in our faces?”
Knife: “Well, sor-ry .”
MePhone4: “You should be. So, let’s start the elimination.”
Fan: “Hold on, where’s Test Tube and Cherries?”
Test Tube: “Here we are.”
Test Tube and Cherries walk over, the Cherries looking visibly roughed up.
Heater: “Yikes, did you two get into a fight or something?”
Test Tube: “You could say that…”
Right Cherry: “Okay, fine, sorry for breaking your stuff or whatever…”
MePhone4: “Alright, now that everyone is here this time, let’s hand out the prizes: sticks! We got a lot of votes-”
MePad shows that 3021 votes were collected overall.
MePhone4: “-so we decided to make it special. Marshmallow, Test Tube, and Balloon are safe.”
Each of them received 73, 103, and 135 votes respectively. They all catch their sticks pretty easily.
Apple: “Oh no, I haven’t been called yet!”
MePhone4: “Apple, not to worry, you only got 153 votes, so you’re safe, too.”
Apple: “Yes!”
Once she catches her stick, she just hands it off to Marshmallow.
Apple: “Here, Marshmallow, you can have mine!”
Marshmallow: “Aw, thanks, Apple! I guess…”
MePhone4: “Heater, Lightbulb, and Fan are also safe. Here are your sticks.”
Each of them got 181, 209, and 341 votes respectively.
Lightbulb: “It’s not as spectacular as oatmeal raisin, but I’ll have to deal with it.”
She then proceeds to… eat the stick. Very loudly.
Heater: “...okay, that’s really concerning.”
MePhone4: “It’s between Cheesy and Cherries. While the Cherries’ jokes are at least a bit tasteful, I can’t say the same for Cheesy.”
Cheesy: “Hey, what’s that supposed to mean, huh?”
Left Cherry: “Gee, I wonder.”
MePhone4: “MePad, show the votes!”
MePad: “This should be good.”
In an almost less dramatic flourish than last time, Cheesy is shown to have 836 votes, while the Cherries have 990 votes.
Heater: “Oh thank goodness… Sorry that you couldn’t stick around, Cherries.”
Cheesy slaps his knee, confusing Heater for a moment before he gets it.
Left Cherry: “...oh, who am I kidding? I deserve this.”
Apple: “What do you mean, Cherries, I always thought you were pretty cool! Box would’ve gotten away with it if it wasn’t for you!”
Left Cherry: “Because… I sent Marshmallow to Mars!”
The rest of their team gasps in shock.
Fan: “What?! Why would you do that?”
Left Cherry: “I was just mad they didn’t like my jokes. I was out of line. I’m sorry, guys.”
They go over to Box before they have to go.
Left Cherry: “Will you forgive me, Box?”
Box sits there, being a box.
Left Cherry: “Well, thanks for accepting my apology.”
The Cherries walk away as Box falls over. MePhone4 is clearly running out of patience now.
MePhone4: “Okay, Cherries, now just get in the portal.”
Right Cherry: “Well, before I go, I just wanted to say sorry for breaking your stuff, Test Tube. For real this time. I may find your rules boring, but it wasn’t right to break anything.”
Test Tube: “Well, I appreciate it.”
Right Cherry: “Thank goodness. Alright, bye, guys! Long Live the Marachinos!”
They jump into the portal afterwards.
Cheesy: “Wow, that phrase was quite the cherry on top of their exit!”
He slaps his knee as Heater chuckles.
MePhone4: “Alright, it’s time for the next challenge. It’s a triathlon!”
Apple: “Wait, what does “triathlon” mean?”
MePhone4: “Well, you ignoramus , it’s basically a three-part race: swimming, cycling, and running. And you gotta ‘tri’ your best to win.”
Cheesy slaps his knee, as per usual.
MePhone4: (sigh) “Okay, Cheesy, they got the joke.”
Cheesy: “Yeah, now they did!”
He elbowed his nearby pal, who chuckled a little.
MePhone4: “And because the team captains are so awesome…”
Lightbulb: “Yeah?”
MePhone4: “They will not be participating.”
Lightbulb: “Oh, the humanity, I can’t compete, oh noooo!”
She spoke with the most sarcastic cadence as she walked over to another spot and set up a lounge chair.
Lightbulb: “Seems like my team is doomed, nooo!”
She then turned to flop into it while putting on sunglasses. Pan to see Baseball is in the exact same position, just with 50% less limbs.
Lightbulb: “Eh, eh, they’ll be fine. They’ll be a’ight…”
Nickel & Paintbrush: “Well, without our captain, I guess I’m in charge now- Huh?!”
Paintbrush: “I’m sorry, Nickel, but I believe I’m the better fit for leader while Baseball’s not around?”
Nickel: “Well, I’ve been Baseball’s right hand man, so if anyone should lead, it should be me!”
Paintbrush: “You’re comparing someone with two episodes worth of leadership to someone who’s been a team leader twice now?”
They gesture to Lightbulb.
Nickel: “You mean the person who got eliminated third?”
Paintbrush: “Over MePhone’s dumb mistake, yes. Now, we should have our strongest members go up-”
Nickel: “And leave those yet to do anything in the background? Yeah, nice leadership skills, PB.”
Paintbrush: “Hey, it makes the most sense!”
Nickel: “Look, I’ll just pick. Tissues can probably rocket himself across the pool, so he’ll go there.”
Tissues: “Awh, but I hate chlorine…”
Paintbrush: “Alright, oh brave and powerful leader, who else should go up?”
Nickel: “Who else… oh, maybe you, Trophy! You’re a jock!”
Trophy: “Eh, I don’t feel like it…”
He drops his milkshake stupidly as he shrugs before walking over to his subordinate.
Trophy: “Knife, you should go!”
Knife: “Well, I’m not sure if-”
Trophy: “Picture!”
Knife: “ Okay ! I’ll do it!”
Suitcase: “I could do the running part!”
Nickel: “Are you very fast?”
Suitcase: I- uh… no…”
Paintbrush: Oh, look who cares about who’s capable enough, now.”
Nickel: “Shut it.”
Microphone inhales, ready to speak, before Nickel quickly shuts her up with his foot.
Nickel: “Yes, you can go too…”
Microphone: (very muffled) “Yay!”
Meanwhile, Marshmallow has approached Lightbulb on the Bright Lights side.
Marshmallow: “Hey, Lightbulb! You should pick our three participants!”
Lightbulb: “Alright, Test Tube can go, then Heaty guy, and… hold on, don’t tell me… Paper?”
Fan looks very unimpressed with her screwed up naming.
Fan: “Are you serious? I knew you were goofy, but now you’re just being dimwitted!”
Heater then walks over.
Heater: “And, uh, what are you made of…?”
Fan: “Well, paper, but-”
Heater: “A- Also, why was I chosen, Lightbulb?”
Lightbulb: “Why not? You seem like a pretty cool guy.”
Cheesy: “More like pretty hot! Cause he’s a heater!”
Cheesy slaps his knee as Heater fires back up again, before the challenge bell rings. Test Tube, who now has a cork installed somehow, who knows where that came from, jumps right in as Tissues just shuffles near the pool.
Suitcase: “Go on, Tissues, get in the pool!”
Tissues: “But the water could make my condi-shawn worse!”
Nickel: “You can get worse? Nevermind, just get in!”
He kicks Tissues right into the pool, and he starts flailing around.
Tissues: “Can’t- (grbb) can’t swim!”
Suitcase: “Oh no!”
Test Tube: “Yikes… well, more of a lead for me, I guess…”
As Tissues continue to flail yet stay afloat, Test Tube makes her way further down the pool.
Knife: “God, if you’re gonna wimp around, at least do it towards me!”
Toilet and MePhone are seen on the sidelines.
Toilet: “Mistah Phone, is there anything you’d like me to do?”
Toilet accidentally spills some of his water on MePhone, the action played two more times in slow motion. After the fact, MePhone glitches out a bit before getting pissed.
MePhone4: “It’s MEPHONE!”
He kicks Toilet into the pool, causing it to be contaminated with toilet water. Tissues starts to turn green at the sight.
Toilet: “Oh, sorry, Mistah MePhone- oh, my toilet water’s gettin’ in the pool!”
Tissues just ends up projectile vomiting his way across the pool, his barf hitting Nickel.
Nickel: “Ugh, gross, dude!”
Paintbrush just snickers at this.
MePhone4: “Toilet, that’s disgusting! Get out now and get me some wires.”
Toilet: “Oh, ri’ away, Mistah Phone!”
He hops out of the pool, accidentally knocking Box in on his way to adventure.
Marshmallow: “AHH! Box is sinking!”
Balloon: “I’ll save him!”
His attempt to jump in the pool is less than successful.
Balloon: “Oh COME ON!”
Test Tube gets out of the pool and tags Heater, who gets onto his bike.
Heater: “Alright, F- Heater… don’t let your team down now!”
He starts cycling as Tissues lands in the water again, his momentum managing to get him to the end of the pool. He gets out quickly before tagging Knife.
Tissues: “Go get ‘em, alliance partner!”
Knife: “Uh, sure… thanks. Let’s just get this stupid thing over with…”
He sets off, too, quickly overtaking Heater by a slim margin. Heater tries to think of something before deciding to activate of his own accord, causing Knife to lose focus and fall back.
Knife: “Gah! You idiot! Woah!”
He wobbles a bit on his bike before it falls over, causing him to sprain his ankle. He just groans in pain before getting back on and continuing.
Knife: “I can’t let this stupid sprain stop me!”
We cut back to Box chilling at the bottom of the pool.
Suitcase: “Box, no!”
A lifering, who had gotten back from a 30 minute break not too long ago, blew their whistle.
Lifering: “We got a sinker!”
He lunges into the water, managing to go under because screw physics, and retrieve Box to put back into the dry world.
Nickel: “He’s alive!”
Cheesy: “So wait, you just sit up there all day?”
Lifering: “That’s my job!”
Cheesy: “Wow! You deserve a round of applause!”
Knee slap to a confused lifering.
Cheesy: “Get it, cause you’re round!”
We cut back to the contest, Knife starting to really feel the sprain.
Knife: “Gah, stupid ankle… stupid Trophy… it’s all so stupid !”
Heater arrives at the final leg.
Heater: “C’mon, Fan, let’s finally win one!”
Fan: “On it! I won’t let you guys down!”
He runs off as Heater smiles after him. Knife arrives and once he stands, he immediately clutches his aching ankle.
Microphone: “Knife? WHAT HAPPENED?!”
Knife: “Agh! You broke my eardrums, that’s what happened!”
Microphone turns her sound receptor off.
Microphone: “Are you sure you’re okay?”
Knife: “Not to be rude… well, actually, yes! I wanna be rude! Go away and START RUNNING ALREADY!”
Mic dashes off after Fan.
Fan: “Oh no! Mic is catching up! I’ll write that down on a blog post real quick!”
He winks as a link to the II blog shows up. Not linking it here, it’s been 12 years. …holy f-
Microphone: “ I’m the best at challenges! With my secret weapon, you have no chance!”
Fan suddenly gets an idea, a Lightbulb going off over him in cartoon fashion.
Fan: “Gee, I don’t think that was loud enough… Can you speak louder, please?”
Microphone turns her sound back on again.
Microphone: “I said… WITH MY! SECRET! WEAPON! ”
This flings Fan into the sky, as he planned, as he opens up and glides to the finish!
Fan: “Not today!”
He crosses the line, and the challenge is over!
MePhone4: “Team Bright Lights finally wins! About time…”
Paintbrush: “Well, well, well-”
Nickel: “I’m not standing here and listening to this.”
He walks over to Mic.
Nickel: “Mic, I think people have finally figured out your strategy… screaming at people ! And just a side note, it’s not working so please stop !”
Microphone: “I thought it was effective! What do you know anyway?”
We cut to Trophy’s “alliance”.
Tissues: “That looked like a nasty fall, are you alright?”
Trophy: “Wow, Knife, I can’t believe what this whole blackmailing thing has caused…”
Tissues: “Wait, wha-”
Knife: “Yeah, but… could be worse, I could’ve broken it. Can you please let me off the hook now?”
Trophy: “What?! No! I was talking about how you made us lose the challenge! If I had half a brain, I’d show everyone the photo now.”
Knife: (mumbling) “Well, good thing you don’t…”
Trophy: “What?!”
Knife: “Huh, what?”
Unbeknownst to the two strong competitors, Tissues glares at Trophy, starting to rethink his alliance deal.
Heater: “I feel so bad, I got Knife injured!”
Balloon: “Honestly, it’s been a long time coming, considering how much of a bully he’s been to everyone!”
Heater: “But what if his bike landed differently? I could’ve broken his leg!”
Marshmallow: “Well, you didn’t! Shame, really, but you’re fine. Sprains usually go away quickly anyhow.”
Heater: “Hm… if you say so…”
Za warudo.
MePhone4: “So readers, vote using the poll in the end notes on who you think will be eliminated next episode. Results will once again be in the beginning notes. Voting ends whenever the next episode is fully finished. Have fun!
The credits then play out before we see Lightbulb still chilling at night. She then takes off her glasses to look around.
Lightbulb: “Yeah, midnight! Normally my bedtime’s like… 7:46, I feel so rebellious…”
She looks to the camera before clearing her throat, packing up her chair and walking offscreen. Episode end.
Notes:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/14Z6tiqdq2RWDNWxwB9_37D1A56eQyxzwztLWuzlr4r0/edit <- Predict who should get out!
Grand Slams: Baseball, Microphone, Paintbrush, Suitcase, Nickel, Knife, Box, Trophy, Tissues, Soap
Bright Lights: Lightbulb, Cheesy, Marshmallow, Heater, Apple, Test Tube, Fan, Balloon
Eliminated: Yin-Yang, Cherries
Hk (Guest) on Chapter 1 Sat 30 Nov 2024 11:33PM UTC
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CompetitionFicCreator on Chapter 1 Sat 30 Nov 2024 11:36PM UTC
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Hk (Guest) on Chapter 1 Sun 01 Dec 2024 12:02AM UTC
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CompetitionFicCreator on Chapter 1 Sun 01 Dec 2024 12:06AM UTC
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H8R (Guest) on Chapter 1 Wed 04 Dec 2024 04:18PM UTC
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CompetitionFicCreator on Chapter 1 Thu 05 Dec 2024 03:09AM UTC
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Hk (Guest) on Chapter 2 Sat 14 Dec 2024 07:31PM UTC
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CompetitionFicCreator on Chapter 2 Sat 14 Dec 2024 07:55PM UTC
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NeverShrek1ForSomeReason on Chapter 3 Wed 06 Aug 2025 04:44PM UTC
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CompetitionFicCreator on Chapter 3 Wed 06 Aug 2025 05:10PM UTC
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Doggytypehype on Chapter 3 Thu 07 Aug 2025 05:43PM UTC
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