Get You Back

by publicenemynumberone

Summary:

“No, you can’t become a hero without a quirk. Villains these days are just too powerful.”

Izuku’s voice shook as he spoke, tears trickling down his bloodless, freckled cheeks. “But it’s my dream.”

All Might shook his head. “Find a new dream.”

In that moment, something cracked and shattered inside the boy, something deep within him that could never be repaired again. Years of ridicule from his peers and his teachers and family and friends and strangers on the street and worst of all…Kacchan, all flashed before his eyes like a torturous movie reel.

They had all been right.

 

A darkness formed in Izuku when All Might told him that someone without a quirk could never become a hero. He changed, and certainly not for the better. A rage blossomed within him the likes of which he had never known before. His dream of becoming a hero died in that moment, and from the ashes, a new aspiration was born--revenge.

Chapter 1: Worms in the Rain

Goosebumps raised across Izuku’s skin, not from the cool spring breeze whipping across the rooftop, but from the realization that the greatest hero in the world stood before him, staring down at him, legs poised to leap from the side of the building and out of Izuku’s life forever before he had the chance to ask the question that had been plaguing his every thought for as long as he could remember.

 

“I have to go,” All Might announced, lunging toward the edge of the rooftop.

 

Izuku’s voice cracked with raw emotion as he shouted, “No, wait! I just have to ask you something. Please, it’ll only take a second.”

 

“I don’t have a second,” the Symbol of Peace muttered. He coughed, turning his head away from Izuku, but not quick enough to hide the blood seeping from the corner of his mouth.

 

A spike of fear raced through Izuku’s chest. “Oh my gosh, are you okay, All Might? Did the sludge villain injure you?”

 

“No, I’m—” All Might’s voice cut off as another cough gurgled in his throat. In the blink of an eye, his body transformed, shrinking and shriveling into a skinny, frazzled shell of a man. His hair fell limp onto his shoulders. His clothes sagged from his bony body, and his eyes hollowed and darkened.

 

Every drop of blood drained from Izuku’s face. His heart raced as he stared up at this horrifying stranger, panic rattling his bones. For the first time since landing on this rooftop, Izuku realized what a dangerous situation he may have gotten himself into.

 

“Who are you?” he demanded, his emerald eyes glistening with tears.

 

“You know who I am,” All Might said. “You just called me by name.”

 

Taking a step back, Izuku shook his head. “You aren’t All Might. You’re an imposter! You probably have some sort of transformation quirk. Who are you?!”

 

“I’m All Might, kid. The real All Might.” The shriveled Symbol of Peace sighed, his shoulders slumping. “I’d appreciate it if you didn’t tell anyone about this. I work really hard to keep this part of myself a secret from the public.”

 

“Why?” Izuku asked. “Why are you like this?”

All Might smirked. “You get one question, kid. Is that really the one you want to ask?”

 

Izuku’s heart skipped a beat. “No,” he said, his mind buzzing with that question again, the one that would change his life forever, no matter the answer.

 

“Well go ahead. I still have places to be.” All Might said dryly.

 

Izuku sucked in a deep breath. His nerves felt electrified, somehow making his heart beat even faster than it had before. His voice was raspy as he finally asked, “Can someone become a hero like you, even if they don’t have a quirk?”

 

The Symbol of Peace furrowed his brow. The seconds passed like hours as Izuku waited for him to reply. His vision blurred with nervous tears as his shaggy green curls bounced before them, dancing in the breeze.

 

Izuku could barely breathe when All Might finally opened his mouth to speak.

 

“No.”

 

The word rang in Izuku’s ears like a siren, echoing off the caverns of his mind.

 

“No, you can’t become a hero without a quirk. Villains these days are just too powerful.”

 

Izuku’s voice shook as he spoke, tears trickling down his bloodless, freckled cheeks. “But it’s my dream.”

 

All Might shook his head. “Find a new dream.”

 

In that moment, something cracked and shattered inside the boy, something deep within him that could never be repaired again. Years of ridicule from his peers and his teachers and family and friends and strangers on the street and worst of all…Kacchan, all flashed before his eyes like a torturous movie reel.

 

They had all been right.

 

Izuku had been wrong, and they had been right. And his hero, the Symbol of Peace in the flesh before him had just confirmed it.

 

And from that cracked, shattered thing deep within Izuku, came a tidal wave of rage that racked his body and pulled his soul beneath its murky waters.

Air. All Katsuki could think about was air as he gagged and gurgled, his lungs filling with disgusting green sludge. He choked and gasped for a breath that wouldn’t come.

 

Focus. Katsuki forced his thoughts away from the burning agony of suffocation for a second. The villain’s sludge was surprisingly warm, he realized. His flailing limbs were coated in a layer of sweat. Sweat. His bloodshot eyes widened with realization.

 

Black spots dotted Katsuki’s vision. He didn’t have long before he would pass out from lack of oxygen. The crowd of heroes and bystanders were already blurring around him.

 

Using his last bit of strength, Katsuki clawed at the sludge filling his mouth and screamed, “Get back! Everybody get the fuck back!” He balled his fists and plunged them deep inside the villain’s blob of a body.

 

Katsuki’s heart hammered in his chest as the faceless crowd reacted to his cry. Many froze in confusion, even heroes standing with mouths agape and eyes wide.

 

“Get…back…!” Katsuki shrieked, his voice muffled by the sludge flooding his mouth once more.

 

A couple of heroes bolted into action, dragging the civilians and colleagues toward the ends of the alleyway and out onto the sidewalk.

 

Katsuki’s hands grew hotter the deeper they went in the sludge. He clenched them tighter, feeling the sweat pooling in his palms. His mind was growing dark and foggy. In a matter of seconds, he would surely pass out.

 

Boom.

 

In a flash, the alley ignited with blinding light. The explosion splattered the sludge in every direction, scattering the villain's body across the ground and up the sides of the buildings.

 

The crowd erupted into madness. Running, slipping, screaming, from the heroes and civilians alike. In the chaos, nobody noticed the explosive boy stomping through the gooey mess, weaving through the mob and escaping to the street.

 

Air. Katsuki could finally breathe. Relief washed over him, though his heart still pounded like a bass drum, pumping more adrenaline through his veins than anything else.

 

As he turned the corner at the end of the street, a realization hit Katsuki, stopping him in his tracks. He had just been attacked by a villain. An actual villain. And. He. Had. Won.

 

This shouldn’t have come as a surprise, he thought. He always knew he would become a hero someday, and not just any hero. The best hero. Even better than All Might himself, but still, he couldn’t help but be impressed with himself.

 

Perhaps he should have stuck around at the site of the attack. There were sure to be news reporters there. He could have claimed his victory and all the glory that went along with it, not to mention the paramedics he probably should have seen since he did nearly die not five minutes prior, and the police officers he probably should have given a statement to before rushing off.

 

Was that illegal? Katsuki wondered. Did I break the law by leaving the scene without giving a statement to the police? He couldn’t be caught breaking the law. That was a sure way to end his hero career before it even started.

 

Growing nervous about his rash behavior, Katsuki turned on his heel, but before he had the chance to march back the way he’d come, he smacked into a brick wall of a man with yellow hair and a shiny white smile.

 

Katsuki’s breath caught in his throat as he choked out, “All…Might…?”

 

“Hello, young man,” the Symbol of Peace said with a wink.

 

Katsuki’s body went numb. He couldn’t believe it. The man he’d idolized since childhood was right there, looking at him, talking to him.

 

Glaring at him? Oh shit…

 

“I know I shouldn’t have left the scene,” Katsuki grunted, panic thundering in his chest. “I was just turning around to head back and give the police my statement.”

 

“Don’t worry about that,” All Might said with a chuckle. “That’s not why I am here.”

 

Katsuki’s stomach flipped giddily at the sound of his hero’s signature catchphrase, but he kept his face molded in a stoic, apathetic expression. “Why the fuck are you here, then?” he asked.

 

“I’m here because I was impressed by your extraordinary display of heroism back there. You did what no other hero present could, myself included.”

 

Eyes widening in surprise, Katsuki’s mind raced. He had done something not even All Might could do? Maybe he was closer to surpassing him than he could have ever realized.

 

“What are you saying, All Might?”

 

“I’m saying you have proven yourself worthy.”

 

“Worthy of what?”

 

All Might’s grin widened, crinkling his eyes. “Worthy of inheriting my power and my legacy, and becoming my successor as the Symbol of Peace.”

 

Katsuki’s jaw unhinged as every last bit of air escaped his lungs. It took a few seconds for his mind to process what All Might just said. His legacy? His successor as the Symbol of Peace? His power? What did that even mean?

 

But despite the myriad of questions rapid-firing through his head, the only words that found their way to his mouth were…

 

“Holy fucking shit.”

The streets were flooded with people. Heroes, victims, police officers, paramedics, fire fighters, and hundreds of wide-eyed onlookers crowded the sidewalks and alleyway where a villain attack had clearly just taken place.

 

And for the first time in his life, Izuku walked right on by without sparing any of it a single glance.

 

He didn’t care to see the heroes speaking with news reporters, soaking up the glory of yet another victory. He didn’t care to see the victims and fans fawning over them, screaming their praises or begging for an autograph.

 

Izuku didn’t care for heroes anymore. In fact, he downright resented them. He wanted to crush them, to break them, to bury them, like All Might had done to his dreams.

 

All Might. Izuku’s stomach turned as he imagined the look on that shriveled face as the Symbol of Peace had destroyed his last shred of hope.

 

What a fucking joke.

 

Fury broiled in Izuku’s gut as he realized the years he’d wasted idolizing such a despicable man. Not only was he a hope-crushing devil, but he was also a liar. All Might wasn’t the chiseled adonis the world thought he was. He was a decrepit old man who coughed up blood and spat on the dreams of a poor quirkless boy with nothing else to live for.

 

“Some fucking hero,” Izuku growled as he turned onto his block.

 

“Let me guess,” a voice slithered into Izuku’s ear as the chill of a shadow fell over him. He froze as the voice continued. “You met the beloved Symbol of Peace.” Izuku whipped around to find a tall masked man cloaked in black.

 

A villain.

 

This realization should have made Izuku tremble with fear, but after today, Izuku wasn’t sure he had any fear left in him. After all, what was there to fear if he had nothing left to live for?

 

“Who the hell are you?”

 

A metal grate hung before the villain’s mouth, muffling his voice as he said, “I can feel the delicious rage emanating from your soul like smoke from smoldering embers. In all my years, I’ve never sensed such intense fury radiating from anyone. You shouldn’t waste it.”

 

Izuku cocked his brow, his lip twitching with intrigue. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

 

“I can help you channel that rage into power, so you can take revenge on those who have wronged you. Civilians. Heroes. Even All Might himself, if you’d like.”

 

Revenge. The word sent a shiver of desire up Izuku’s back, a shiver that before that day, he’d only felt when he thought about being a hero, a shiver he thought he’d never feel again after All Might murdered his dreams. A thrum of yearning settled in Izuku’s chest, churning the rage bubbling up from his core.

 

Revenge. Could he really achieve such an unimaginable feat?

 

“I’m listening,” Izuku said gruffly.

 

Though he couldn’t see it beneath the mangled metal covering his mouth, Izuku swore he could hear a smile in the villain’s voice as he responded.

 

“My name is All for One, and I am your new master.”

Notes:

Thank you so much for reading! This is the first fanfic I've ever written, so I was a little nervous about posting it. I really hope you enjoy it!

Chapter 2: Goodbye, Kacchan

Lightning sizzled in Katsuki’s veins as he strode across the middle school quad, flanked by a couple of extras. He couldn’t believe how damn powerful he felt, even only having One for All and training with All Might for just a few months. 

 

“Don’t show off,” All Might’s warning rang in Katsuki’s mind. “You already have the battle skills and tact, but you need to work on your attitude. Plus, if anyone notices your sudden enhancements and finds out about our power, you and anyone who knows will be in grave danger.”

 

Katsuki scoffed irritably. It seemed so stupid to him that he had been given the greatest power in the world, but he couldn’t show it to anyone.

 

“You will,” All Might had said comfortingly. “Once you make it into UA and begin your formal training, you will slowly be able to reveal and develop your use of One for All over time.”

 

Katsuki could be described as a lot of things, but patient wasn’t one of them. It infuriated him not being able to wow his posse with his incredible new powers—his speed, his strength, even his explosions were more powerful now with some extra juice from his new quirk.

 

“Come on, Katsuki. Give us a show.” Extra #1 whined. They came and went so frequently that Katsuki didn’t even bother learning their names anymore.

 

“Yeah!” Extra #2 chimed in. “Don’t you want to have a little fun? It’s your birthday, for fuck’s sake!”

 

“No!” Katsuki roared, scaring a nearby flock of pigeons into flight. He rolled his eyes, grumbling a few obscenities under his breath. “Not today.”

 

“Come on, Kacchan. Give us a show.”

 

Katsuki whipped around to see Deku stepping out from behind the trunk of the huge cherry blossom tree in the center of the quad. Little pink petals dusted his green hair, twinkling in the sunlight as he tentatively approached Katsuki.

 

“What the fuck are you doing here, Deku?”

 

Izuku shrugged, gripping the straps of his yellow backpack on his shoulders. “I go to school here, too, you know. I heard your conversation and thought I’d also like to see one of your shows. After all, it is your birthday and your quirk is absolutely amazing.”

 

The hairs on the back of Katsuki’s neck raised. It wasn’t like Deku to approach him and speak so forwardly to him. He was more of a cower-in-the-corner-and-cry type person, especially when it came to interacting with Katsuki.

 

“What’re you playing at, Nerd?”

 

Deku’s eyes widened, their green so bright and glistening that Katsuki lost himself in them, but only for a fraction of a second before that familiar twinge of fury blossomed in his chest, the fury he felt anytime he was around Deku for more than an instant, the fury at the blind hope that shined in the nerd’s eyes no matter how fucking depressing his life was, the fury at the idea that despite Deku being a quirkless loser, he still thought somehow he could beat Katsuki and become the number one hero someday. What a fucking idiot.

 

“You wanna see a show?” Katsuki asked, arching a daring brow.

 

Deku nodded, a single pitiful tear trickling down his cheek. “More than anything, Kacchan.”

 

Months of mental and emotional control training with All Might vanished in an instant as Katsuki’s mind became consumed with a singular urge—the need to show stupid Deku, once and for all, that he would never get the better of him.

 

A wicked grin spread across Katsuki’s lips as he tapped into that euphoric current coursing through his veins.

 

I’ll give you a fucking show.

 

Sweat poured from his palms, dripping from his fingers as though he had just dunked his hands in a vat of nitroglycerin. It was far more than he could ever summon willingly before receiving All Might’s quirk, and it sent a thrill of excitement and pride up his spine.

 

Thrusting his hands downward, Katsuki let off an explosion that shook the ground like an earthquake, propelling him high into the air above the middle school grounds. The extras’ mouths gaped and gasped as they watched Katsuki fly across the sky above them. A bunch of other extras even stopped to gawk at him, shouting for their friends inside to come out and watch his amazing feats.

 

Katsuki danced through the air, letting off bursts that simmered in his wake like the sparkling trail of a shooting star. He zoomed around the top of the cherry blossom tree, careful not to let his explosions get too close to the branches and risk catching it on fire.

 

As he rounded the other side of the tree, Katsuki glanced down to shoot Deku a smug smirk, but to Katsuki’s surprise, Deku wasn’t looking at him. Instead, he was sitting on the ground with his head down, hunched over his lap.

 

Katsuki plummeted toward the ground, careful to soften his landing with a few small blasts. Rage flared in his chest, his eyes alight with that same familiar fury.

 

“What the fuck, Nerd?!”

 

Then, he saw it. The thing Deku was hunched over, far more engrossed in than he was in watching Katsuki’s incredible power.

 

It was a notebook, and Deku was furiously scribbling in it. Still.

 

Fear and rage shook Katsuki to his core. What could the stupid nerd possibly be writing in that thing? Flaws in Katsuki’s technique? Ways he could improve or be beaten? Or…

 

Oh shit. Had Deku figured out that Katsuki’s power was far more than it had ever been before? Was he catching on about One for All, even though he likely hadn’t figured it out completely yet?

 

Katsuki couldn’t take the chance. Stupid Deku couldn’t lie for shit, and he couldn’t keep his mouth shut to save his life. Katsuki needed to destroy that damn notebook immediately, even if that meant destroying Deku along with it.

 

“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING, DEKU?! GIVE ME THAT!” Katsuki screamed, activating One for All in his legs and flying over to Deku in an instant.

 

“Wow, you’re so fast, Bakugou! How did you get so fast?!” Extra #2 shouted.

 

Shit. He really needed to cool it with the One for All antics before everyone caught on.

 

Deku took advantage of Katsuki’s momentary distraction to scramble to his feet. Tucking his notebook in the crook of his arm, Deku took off running toward the main school building.

 

Katsuki scoffed, taking off after him. Even without using One for All, Katsuki could easily outrun the scrawny boy. He was close on his heels as they flew through the front doors, reaching out to grab the collar of Deku’s shirt as they rounded the corner into the main hallway.

 

Deku swerved out of the way just in time to avoid Katsuki’s grasp. He ducked into a stairwell and flew up the first flight of stairs.

 

Katsuki wasn’t quite as quick on the stairs, especially since he couldn’t use his explosions to propel him in such a tight enclosed area.

 

“Stop running and give me the damn notebook, Nerd!” Katsuki’s shout echoed up the stairwell, but Deku didn’t slow. If anything, the request seemed to make him climb the steps even faster.

 

Roaring in frustration, Katsuki quickened his pace, taking the stairs two at a time. Up and up they went, past the second and third and fourth floors. Once they passed the fifth floor, Katsuki’s speed faltered.

 

All that was left past the fifth floor was the roof. A dead end. Why would the fucking idiot go this way?

 

A door banged shut at the top of the stairs. Deku was gone, clearly already out on the roof. He was getting away. Katsuki couldn’t let him get away, not with that notebook. He zoomed up the last flight of stairs and threw open the door, rushing out into the blazing sunlight.

 

The door slammed shut behind Katsuki as he blinked, his eyes readjusting to the bright outdoor light. Deku stood on the far side of the roof. There was nowhere else for him to go, nowhere else for him to run.

 

But to Katsuki’s surprise, Deku didn’t look bothered by being cornered up here. In fact, he wore a very peculiar expression. His eyes were narrowed with determination, and his mouth was gathered in a crooked smile.

 

He looked…victorious, and Kacchan had never hated something so much in his entire life.

 

“Why the fuck do you look so smug? You’re cornered. Now hand over the stupid fucking notebook!”

 

“Or what?” Deku challenged.

 

“Or I’ll beat the shit out of you, obviously!”

 

Deku clicked his tongue. “That doesn’t sound very heroic, Kacchan.”

 

“Does it look like I give a fuck?!” Katsuki bolted toward Deku, but he stopped dead in his tracks when, to his utter surprise, Deku tossed the notebook at Katsuki’s feet.

 

Deku shrugged, his lips still curled in that devious smirk. “There. It’s yours.”

 

Katsuki’s heart pounded angrily in his chest. This was wrong. This was all wrong. Why would Deku want to be chased all the way up here to the roof just to hand over the stupid notebook so easily?

 

Wait a second…the roof.

 

Katsuki’s face went slack, the blood draining from his cheeks as realization washed over him.

 

“Looks like you just figured something out,” Deku cooed condescendingly. “How cute.”

 

Snatching the notebook off the ground, Katsuki turned on his heel and charged back toward the door. He grabbed the handle, but it wouldn’t twist. It wouldn’t even budge.

 

Deku chuckled. “It locks automatically. I made sure of that.”

 

Turning back around, Katsuki barked, “What the hell is your plan here, Deku?”

 

“I think you already know, Kacchan.”

 

Katsuki sneered, panic fluttering in his chest. This wasn’t happening. This couldn’t be happening.

 

“They won’t think it was me. They’ll know I didn’t throw you off the roof.”

 

“Of course they will. What exactly did you think I was writing in that notebook?”

 

A look of horror crossed Katsuki’s face as he opened the notebook. On the first page, only a small note was scribbled across the top line:

 

A life without a quirk is not a life worth living. Here’s to hoping I’m luckier in the next one.

 

Fear thrashed in Katsuki’s gut. His breathing shallowed to small, raspy gasps. This isn’t happening. This isn’t happening!

 

“What was it you said to me all those months ago?”

 

Deku’s voice jolted Katsuki back into the present, his gaze snapping to those seas of shimmery green. They were smiling. Fucking smiling.

 

“Don’t do this. You’re stupid, Deku, but you aren’t this fucking stupid!”

 

“Stupid? I’m just doing exactly what you told me to do.”

 

“I was joking !”

 

Deku chuckled. “That’s a pretty fucked up joke. Even for you.”

 

“You’re right. It was kinda fucked up, but I never thought you’d actually be stupid enough to take it seriously!”

 

Deku stepped backward, up onto the ledge of the rooftop, and Katsuki’s heart stopped for a beat. His ears were ringing so loud he could barely hear Deku’s voice anymore.

 

“The sad thing is, you were right, Kacchan. A quirkless life isn’t really a life at all. I should actually be thanking you. If you hadn’t said that to me, I might have gone on suffering this miserable existence. It was merciful, really. So thank you, for doing me that kindness.”

 

Katsuki hated the tears burning in his eyes and the rasp of raw emotion in his voice as he called out, “It wasn’t kind or merciful. It was mean, I admit that.”

 

“I’m sorry that it won’t be a swan dive as you requested. I suppose I’m just too cowardly to face my fate head-on. I’m not as brave as you, you know that.”

 

Dread pooled in Katsuki’s gut, sending a few warm tears down his pale cheeks. He took a few steps forward and mustered every ounce of anger left within him. “Don’t do this! Step down from that ledge, you fucking idiot!”

 

The smile that slipped onto Deku’s lip summoned bile in the back of Katsuki’s throat. It was a smile he knew all too well. A smile he’d seen a million times on All Might, on other pros, even on his own face in the mirror when he imagined himself as a pro hero.

 

It was a smile of victory in the face of fear.

 

“No, Deku! STOP!!!” Katsuki screeched, activating One for All in his legs without even meaning to.

 

He bolted across the rooftop in a second, but he was half a second too late.

 

“Goodbye, Kacchan,” Deku whispered. Time slowed to a crawl as he slipped backward off the ledge, just out of Katsuki’s reach.

 

I can stop him. I can save him!

 

But Katsuki didn’t have any training in actually saving anybody yet. He had no idea what to do in a time of crisis, and shock was already boring itself into his bones, paralyzing him.

 

So he just stood there, arm still outstretched and eyes bulging out of their sockets as his oldest friend, his victim, his biggest fan, his fucking rival , plummeted down five stories.

 

He looked away just in time to avoid the horrific sight, but the crack of Deku’s body colliding with the concrete below was a sound that will haunt Katsuki until the day he dies.

Notes:

This was so hard to write, like a lot harder than I thought it would be when I first came up with the concept. It really broke my heart. It's going to be okay though! Yes, I'm reassuring myself as much as anyone else, haha. But just hold on! It really will be okay...eventually! I hope you still enjoyed it, even if it broke your heart as much as it broke mine. I'm going to try to have the next chapter out really soon so its not just left hanging like this for too long. Anyway, thank you so much for reading!!

Chapter 3: Some Fucking Hero

A pair of emeralds, bright pools of green shimmering in the sunlight. They grew smaller, drifting away ever so slowly as fingertips slipped just past each other, one hand firm and steady, the other floating in a slow motion freefall.

 

There was a plea in those emeralds for a split second, a cry for help that would have been indistinguishable for anyone who hadn’t been staring into them for as long as they could remember.

 

A guttural yelp erupted from Katsuki’s throat, forcing the air from his lungs. His eyes stung with tears as he watched helplessly, unable to move or even breathe, as Deku fell away from him. The moments stretched into lifetimes, each second more agonizing than the last as his stomach churned and his chest grew so tight he thought his heart might implode from the pressure.

 

I can stop him. I can save him! Please god, let me save him…

 

But no matter how vehemently Katsuki begged his body to move, he remained motionless, a stone gargoyle permanently perched atop the roof of his middle school.

 

What kind of hero tells someone to jump off a building? What kind of hero takes advantage of someone’s utter adoration and only gives cruelty and abuse in return? What kind of hero just sits here and watches someone fall to their death?

 

Then suddenly, time sped up. Deku was falling faster, so fast, way too fast for Katsuki to ever dream of reaching him.

 

I’m no fucking hero.

 

Crack!

 

Katsuki jolted awake with a gasp. Sweat dewed his forehead, trickling down from his temples and dripping from his sharp jawline. He glanced around in the pale early morning light, quickly noticing his phone buzzing on the floor. He leaned over and retrieved it without lifting his head from his pillow.

 

“Don’t you dare wish me happy birthday,” Katsuki grumbled groggily.

 

All Might’s voice crackled in from the other end of the line, sounding more somber than usual. “I wouldn’t dream of it. Good morning, Young Bakugou.”

 

“I’m twenty-five now, All Might. Isn’t it about time you start calling me Katsuki?”

 

“Are you going to start calling me Toshinori?”

 

Katsuki scoffed. “Of course not.”

 

“Then Young Bakugou it is.”

 

“Whatever.”

 

A few glass sake bottles littered Katsuki’s nightstand. They were all empty except for the one sitting closest to the edge. Katsuki leaned over and grabbed it, taking a swig.

 

“Did you need something?” Katsuki asked, his voice wet with wine.

 

“Young Bakugou, it’s five-thirty in the morning.”

 

“It’s water, ” Katsuki said halfheartedly, taking another swig in an attempt to dull the lingering ache in his chest from the nightmare.

 

All Might sighed. “Look, I know today is hard for you. It’s hard for me too, but—”

 

Buzz. Buzz.

 

Katsuki pulled the phone away from his ear to see who else could be calling him at the crack of dawn. Incoming call from Eijirou.

 

“I gotta go,” Katsuki muttered, putting the phone back up to his ear.

 

“All right. Are we still on for this evening?”

 

“Yep.” The explosive man downed the last of the sake bottle and slammed it down on his nightstand.

 

All Might lowered his voice, a small plea slipping into his tone. “Wouldn’t you rather go to a nice restaurant uptown?”

 

“No. Bye.” Katsuki hung up the phone before All Might could protest. So what if he wanted to spend his birthday at the same shithole he went to every night? If All Might didn’t like it, he didn’t have to come.

 

Without thinking better of it, Katsuki answered the next call. “Hey, E. Didn’t know you were capable of being up this early.”

 

“Morning, K…” Katsuki’s heart skipped a beat as Eijirou paused. His voice sounded haggard, as though he hadn’t slept.

 

“What’s the situation?”

 

“First off, happy birthday. Sorry if I woke you…”

 

Katsuki’s stomach lurched, the fresh sake turning in his empty stomach. He hopped out of bed and lunged toward his desk in the corner of the room, rummaging through the drawers as he responded. “Uh…thanks. You didn’t wake me.”

 

“Shit, sorry. I forgot about the birthday thing. There is a bit of a situation…”

 

Katsuki paused. Something was very wrong. Eijirou never sounded this…fucking defeated, his voice devoid of every ounce of his usual peppy optimism.

 

“What is it?” Katsuki demanded, a little too harshly.

 

“It’s Shouto. He’s… He’s missing, man.”

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow. “What do you mean, he’s missing?”

 

“Hanta showed up at our place in the middle of the night last night. Apparently a few of Shouto’s sidekicks showed up at their apartment saying they hadn’t seen him since afternoon rounds. We’ve been looking everywhere, calling everyone, but he’s nowhere and no one’s seen him. Hanta’s a real mess right now. We could really use your help on this, man…” Eijirou’s voice broke off in a muffled sob.

“It’s going to be okay. Shouto can take care of himself,” Katsuki said as gently as he could with his nerves so on edge, and the alcohol was doing nothing to dull the speeding of his heart. What the fuck did Icy Hot get himself into this time?

 

Eijirou sniffled. “I know, but what if the League…?”

 

Katsuki couldn’t handle this. Not today, when he had so much of his own shit swimming in his restless mind. “I can’t come over today, but I’ll do some digging. I’ll call you if I find anything.”

 

“Thanks, man. Seriously, thank you so much. At this point, any intel would be greatly appreciated.” Eijirou’s voice shook. Katsuki could tell he was about to burst into tears at any moment, and he really couldn’t deal with that right now.

 

“Well, I better get to it.”

 

Katsuki hung up the phone and tossed it on his desk, running a shaky hand through his spiky blonde hair. He thrust open the top drawer of his desk and frantically rummaged around. “I know I’ve got a pack in here somewhere,” he uttered under his breath.

 

Katsuki recoiled as his hand grazed a battered slab of thin cardboard, his heart plummeting into his stomach. It was a notebook. The notebook. He’d forgotten he stashed it in this drawer of all places.

 

Fucking perfect. Katsuki thought, burning tears welling up in his eyes. “Fuck!” he shouted, shoving the wretched notebook aside and plunging his hand deep into the drawer until he finally found what he was looking for—a crumpled pack of cigarettes.

 

Katsuki threw one in his mouth and lit it with a tiny explosion, taking a deep breath and letting the nicotine numb his mind for half a second before a thunderous cough rumbled up from the back of his throat. Shit, I guess it’s been a minute since I last smoked.

 

Covering his mouth with his hand, Katsuki hacked and heaved until the coughing fit passed, but as he pulled his hand away, he noticed a smattering of blood mixing with the sheen of nitroglycerin in his palm. Fuck, not again. He grabbed a tissue from the box on his desk and wiped his hand and mouth clean.

 

Katsuki stared at the burning cigarette in his hand, contemplating putting it out. He really shouldn’t be smoking. Pro heroes weren’t supposed to smoke or do anything to hinder their physical health. That probably included drinking like a fish, but that had never stopped Katsuki before. He’d rather torture his body than feel the agonizing guilt and despair rotting his soul, so he stuck the cigarette back in his mouth and took another drag.

 

“Is that blood?”

 

Katsuki whipped around at the sound of the groggy voice, quickly spotting the mess of shaggy black hair and bare skin tangled up in his sheets. Oh yeah, that guy. Almost forgot about him.

 

“Get out,” Katsuki demanded evenly.

 

The guy rubbed sleep from his eyes, wrinkling his brow in confusion. “What? Right now?”

 

“Yeah. I’ve got shit to do.”

 

“But last night, you said—”

 

“Yeah, I say a lot of shit when I’m drunk and horny. Now, I’m saying get the fuck out.”

 

The guy snorted irritably, but he obeyed, sliding out of bed and getting dressed. “Who knew the number one hero could be such an asshole?”

 

“Everyone who actually knows me,” Katsuki admitted with a dark chuckle.

 

“Can I see you again sometime, Dynamight?” the guy asked, making his way to the bedroom door.

 

Katsuki sneered, letting out a puff of smoke. “No, dipshit. You only get the best fuck of your life once.”

 

The colorful lights of the city danced in the rain as Katsuki sped into a parking spot out front of his favorite bar in the seediest neighborhood in Tokyo.

 

Darkness had fallen during his drive over from his office uptown, and Katsuki was glad for it. He was less likely to get recognized beneath the cover of night, especially with his black baseball cap pulled low over his eyes. He hadn’t had time to go home and get dressed, so he still wore the base of his hero costume beneath his black sweats he kept in his car for lunchtime workouts.

 

Katsuki cringed as he stepped out into the rain. Even though he had developed techniques over the years to use his quirk in the rain, he still hated it. It was cold and gray and isolating, and he had enough of that in his soul, he didn’t need to see it in the world around him as well.

 

A little bell rang above the door as Katsuki hurried inside and headed straight to his regular seat at the bar.

 

“The usual?” the bartender asked, grabbing a fresh glass from the stack above his head.

 

Katsuki nodded curtly, catching the eye of a handsome man laughing with his friends on the far side of the bar. His hair and eyes were dusty green, paler than the shade that haunted Katsuki’s memories, but the resemblance still sent a spike of panic through his chest. He looked away with a scoff, grabbing his glass of sake and downing it in one gulp.

 

“Another.”

 

The bartender nodded, filling Katsuki’s glass and leaving the bottle next to it. “And for you, sir?”

 

Katsuki started, noticing the man who had joined him. All Might smiled, eyes soft and kind as ever. “Just water for me. Thank you.”

 

“I didn’t hear you come in,” Katsuki muttered, steadying his breathing.

 

All Might shrugged, jutting his chin out toward the green-eyed man across the bar. “You were distracted.”

 

Katsuki rolled his eyes. With anyone else he would have had given some snide remark of denial, but the alcohol was buzzing pleasantly in his mind and All Might would’ve known better anyway. So instead, Katsuki just nodded and downed another glass of sake.

 

“You really shouldn’t drink so much, Young Bakugou,” All Might said, his tone more that of concern than reprimand.

 

Katsuki shrugged, pouring himself another glass. “It’s my fucking birthday. I can die if I want to.”

 

A look of horror crossed All Might’s expression. Katsuki scoffed. “Chill. It’s just a joke.”

 

All Might’s face relaxed, but the terror didn’t leave his bright blue eyes. “How have you been feeling?”

 

“Fine.”

 

All Might arched his brow questioningly. Katsuki puckered his lips. Damn, he knows me too well.

 

“Have you been coughing up blood again? Please don’t try to lie. Despite what you think, you aren’t very good at it.”

 

Katsuki let out a resigned sigh. “Yeah, but only a little.”

 

“Have you spoken with the vestiges about it?”

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow. “No, why? Have you?”

 

All Might didn’t say anything, only chewed on the inside of his cheek, but that was answer enough for Katsuki.

 

“What did they say?” Katsuki demanded.

 

“We can talk about this tomorrow. Let’s just have a nice evening for your birthday.”

 

“Fuck my birthday! What did they say? Am I dying?!”

 

The room grew quieter at Katsuki’s outburst.

 

All Might looked around nervously, lowering his voice to a whisper. “Calm down, Young Bakugou. This can wait until tomorrow. I’ll come to your place, and we can discuss it in private.”

 

Anger broiled in Katsuki’s gut, that same unbridled fury that he could never fully tame even after a decade of training. He needed to get some fresh air before he exploded…literally. He stood from his barstool and stomped toward the door.

 

“Young Bakugou! Where are you going?”

 

Katsuki threw the door open and stepped out into the rain. “I’ll be right back.”

 

“Are you smoking again?” All Might called, but Katsuki let the door slam in his wake before he could answer.

 

Katsuki felt bad being so utterly reckless and making All Might worry about him, but he needed it. All of it. The booze and the cigarettes and the endless mental torture. He needed to punish himself since nobody else had ever seemed up to the challenge, and fuck if he didn’t deserve it. He was a piece of shit who had convinced the sweetest boy to ever walk this earth to kill himself. He might as well have thrown him off the roof himself. And why did he do it? Because Deku had dreams? Because he loved Katsuki with everything he had? Because he wanted to become a hero despite not having a quirk? And people thought Katsuki deserved praise and adoration and glory after pulling a stunt like that?

 

Bullshit. Katsuki stuck a fresh cigarette in his mouth and popped off a small explosion to light it. This is exactly what I deserve. To smoke and drink myself into an early grave.

 

A flash of green barely visible amidst the downpour passed beneath the streetlamp in front of Katsuki. His breath latched in his throat, causing him to choke on the smoke lodged in his lunges.

 

It was a head of green hair tucked beneath a knit cap, the very same shade as the boy he saw every time he closed his eyes. Katsuki’s head went numb, his heart pounding so hard he thought he might be having a heart attack.

 

“Deku?” The raspy whisper slipped from his lips before he had the chance to think twice about it. It couldn’t be him, you fucking idiot. Deku’s dead. You fucking killed him.

 

The green head stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, turning back. Katsuki’s heart stopped when his crimson gaze met the same emeralds that plagued his every nightmare. Oh my god. It’s him. Am I hallucinating? Have I lost my damn mind?

 

Katsuki jolted with surprise when a high, soft voice rang out in the space between them, that familiar green gaze flickering with recognition. “Katsuki?”

 

Katsuki’s heart skipped a beat as he looked beyond the green hair and eyes, finally recognizing the person standing before him. A woman, wearing a fuzzy pink sweater with a bouquet of lilies cradled in her arms.

 

“Mrs. Midoriya…?” Katsuki whispered, wincing as his vision blurred with the sting of fresh tears.

 

“You can call me Inko now, Katsuki.”

 

Her voice echoed in Katsuki’s mind but his thoughts were far too loud for him to really hear it. He hadn’t seen her in years, probably since the funeral that his parents had forced him to attend even though he would have literally rather died. How could he face her after all this time? After he’d become the number one hero while her precious baby boy rotted beneath the earth? After he’d killed her one and only son?

 

Katsuki couldn’t do this. Not today. Not when he was on the verge of tears he didn’t deserve to shed. He flicked his cigarette into the gutter and rushed back inside the bar without so much as another glance at the woman who should want nothing more than to see Katsuki’s body bloody and broken like Deku’s had been when she showed up to identify him. Katsuki wanted her to do that. To beat him to death or throw him off the roof of some other building. She deserved some sort of justice, no matter how small, but he also knew she’d never do that. Because she was Inko Midoriya, the mother who raised the sweetest boy in the world, and neither of them would ever tickle a fly, let alone hurt someone.

 

Let alone kill someone.

 

God, Katsuki needed to get out of there.

 

Marching back over to the bar, the explosive young man grabbed the half-empty bottle of sake and downed the rest of it.

 

“Young Bakugou, please,” All Might said quietly, his blue eyes full of sadness. “You can’t drown your emotions forever. Talk to me. Or someone else, whoever you want. Please, just stop torturing yourself like this.”

 

“‘M fine, All Might…” Katsuki slurred, the alcohol blurring his mind and the world around him. It didn’t ease the constant ache tearing at his chest, but it did make him forget about it, at least for a little while.

 

All Might sighed. “What did I tell you about lying?”

 

Slamming the empty bottle down on the bar, Katsuki waved the bartender over. “H’ much do I owe?”

 

“It’s on the house, Dynamight sir. Happy birthday.”

 

Katsuki shot All Might a crooked smile. “A’ least this fuckin’ day isn’ a complete waste.” He turned on his heel, setting his sights on the other end of the bar.

 

“Where are you going?” All Might asked, though the question sounded rhetorical. He already knew exactly where Katsuki was headed.

 

“Gotta go make s’more bad decisions,” Katsuki called over his shoulder. “S’ya tomorrow.” He marched over and pointed at the cheap Deku lookalike, silencing the group of friends surrounding him.

 

“Oh my god, is that Dynamight?” some extra whispered.

 

“In the flesh,” Katsuki said, not breaking eye contact with Cheap Deku. “You wanna get outta here?”

 

Cheap Deku nodded, a sly smirk slipping onto his lips.

 

Scorching water sprinkled Katsuki’s skin as he sucked in the steam radiating from his naked body. He liked to shower and wash away any residual sweat coating his palms and skin before hooking up. He’d never had any mishaps with his quirk before, but sex had a way of making him lose himself for the briefest moment, and he’d rather be safe than sorry.

 

The only shitty part of showering was the way it tended to sober him up.

 

“Hey, Chea… uh… Dude?” Katsuki chuckled at the fact he had no idea what Cheap Deku’s name really was. Okay, maybe he wasn’t that sober. “Can you go to the fridge and grab us a bottle of sake?”

 

Silence. No creak of the bed or vocal response, which was weird because the guy literally would not shut up the whole ride back to Katsuki’s place.

 

“Dude?” Katsuki tried again, shutting off the water so he could hear better.

 

Still nothing. Fuck, did the asshole fall asleep?

 

Katsuki grabbed a fresh towel from the rack and dried off, tying it around his waist before padding back into his bedroom.

 

“If you’re too tired, you can get the fuck out…” Katsuki’s voice trailed off as his gaze landed on Cheap Deku, not in bed, but in the arms of a young man with shaggy green hair and fucking emerald eyes.

 

Katsuki yelped, gasping for air as panic pumped through his veins.

 

The man tightened his grip, all of his fingers smothering Cheap Deku’s mouth except his pointer finger which hovered an inch above Cheap Deku’s nose.

 

“He sort of looks like me, doesn’t he? Was that what drew you to him?”

 

“Who the fuck are you?” Katsuki demanded, shaken by the dread filling his chest.

 

“Oh, come on, Dynamight. Let’s not play this game. You know exactly who I am.”

 

It can’t be him. It can’t be Deku. Deku’s dead. I killed him. This is a liar. An imposter. Katsuki wanted to scream, wanted to shout an endless stream of obscenities at the fucking bastard, but his mouth refused to move. He was frozen. Stuck staring. Just like he had been when Deku had jumped. Just like he was in every nightmare he’d had since.

 

“Don’t feel much like talking now? Funny. I remember you as someone who would never shut the fuck up, even when you really should have. Well. Maybe this’ll liven you up.”

 

The man lowered his pointer finger and Cheap Deku’s face froze. Crackling gray matter spread from the man’s hand, turning Cheap Deku’s head to dust in an instant.

 

Katsuki was no stranger to death, but seeing the man he was literally about to fuck crumble away to nothing in a matter of seconds did jolt him back into reality.

 

“You aren’t him,” Katsuki growled as Cheap Deku’s clothes fluttered to the floor. “He died.”

 

“Oh, I did.” The man ran a hand through his shaggy green locks. “Broke every bone in my body. My heart stopped beating, and my soul left this world. Thank god someone was around to bring me back, right? And guess what? It wasn’t one of you dumbfuck heroes.”

 

A dreadful numbness erupted at the top of Katsuki’s head and trickled down his entire body until he felt like the very ghost staring back at him.

 

“Deku?” Katsuki whispered, his voice cracking with emotion he’d been drowning every day since he last gazed into those godforsaken emeralds.

 

“In the flesh,” Deku said with a wink, shooting Katsuki a smile that made him want to laugh and cry and drop dead all at the same time.

Notes:

Ahh poor Katsuki. Sad Katsuki makes me so sad! I cried so much planning and writing this chapter (while listening to Stick Season by Noah Kahan on repeat haha). At least Deku's alive! Though the Deku Katsuki knew definitely seems to be long gone. Anyway, on to the next chapter. And thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Chapter 4: Embers

Deku is alive.

 

Katsuki’s spiky blonde hair blew back as he dodged Deku’s deadly hand reaching for his neck.

 

Holy fucking shit. Deku is fucking alive.

 

One for All activated in his legs with little conscious effort, sending him flying past Deku to the other side of the room in an instant. Over the years, Katsuki had developed impeccable combat skills, so much so that they were basically second nature now.

 

And that really came in handy when his mind lost all sense outside those green emeralds and the ghost accompanying them.

 

Deku whipped around to face Katsuki. He was fast, but Katsuki was faster, just like he’d always been. Not that it ever really mattered.

 

Deku is alive. Katsuki stared into those crystal pools of green for half a second, remembering how it used to feel, getting lost in them, and the fury that accompanied that weakness. Why had it been that way? Why did those eyes always captivate him, even before they’d been the last thing he’d seen of Deku alive? Why did that make him so angry?

 

God, Katsuki needed a drink.

 

His eyes flicked to his nightstand as Deku lunged toward him again, hand outstretched and taut, like the claw of a predator closing in on its prey.

 

Katsuki could’ve easily knocked Deku out with an explosion, but he didn’t. He couldn’t. He told himself it was because he didn’t want to damage his apartment or cause a commotion, but deep down he knew he didn’t actually care about any of that.

 

He didn’t care about much anymore, certainly not about himself, in fact he actively despised himself, but… Deku is alive. Right here in front of me. Trying to kill me, but… Katsuki wasn’t nearly as bothered about that as he probably should’ve been. He didn’t blame Deku for wanting to kill him. Isn’t that exactly what he deserved?

 

Okay, Katsuki needed to quit fucking around and get some damn answers.

 

Without thinking much about it, Katsuki pivoted and punched Deku in the cheek and shouted, “How the fuck are you alive? Where have you been?!”

 

Covering his face with his hands, Deku barreled over, noises erupting from between his fingers. At first, Katsuki thought he was groaning from the pain, but that wasn’t it. He was fucking laughing.

 

As he pulled his hands away from his reddened face, Deku struck that sly smile that made Katsuki want to punch him again. “Ah, now that’s the Katsuki I remember.”

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow. Why did his name sound so sour coming from that smile? Because Deku didn’t call you Katsuki, dumbass.

 

“You look bothered, Katsuki.”

 

“Stop calling me that.”

 

Deku laughed again, this time just a little amused chuckle. “What? Katsuki? That’s still your name, isn’t it?”

 

“That was never my name. Not to you.”

 

Crossing his arms, Deku arched his brow. “What do you want me to call you? Kacchan? ”

 

Though deeper and raspier now, hearing Deku’s voice form the word, Kacchan, made Katsuki’s heart feel like it was being raked over burning coals. This is real. Deku is here. Not just the ghost haunting my memories, but standing in my bedroom. How the fuck—

 

Deku’s eyes darkened as he lunged at Katsuki again, his murderous fingers poised for the kill. Katsuki dodged at lightning speed, grabbing Deku’s wrist and slamming him backward into the wall next to his bedroom window.

 

Deku raised his free hand to strike, but he couldn’t match Katsuki’s speed. Nobody could.

 

Katsuki grabbed it and pinned both his hands above his head, pressing his body against Deku’s to keep him from moving. Yeah, that was the only reason. It wasn’t because he’d been dreaming about him every night for a decade, nor the fact that touching Deku made his heart race in a way none of the cheap lookalikes ever had.

 

The sweet scent of nitroglycerin wafted up from Katsuki’s neck as the heat from Deku’s breath sent a shiver down his spine. “Shit, take me to dinner first, Kacchan. ”

 

Fuck, why did Katsuki like that so much? Hearing Deku say his name, the warmth of their bodies pressed against each other? He should be angry. Angry was his default. Angry at the villains, angry at the world, most of all, angry at himself…but in that moment, he couldn’t bring himself to be angry. Even though he knew. Deku didn’t have to say it. Katsuki knew that Deku had been turned, that he’d been rescued by a villain and become one himself. That a villain had done what he, now the number one hero, couldn’t.

 

But Katsuki didn’t care about any of that right now. Because all he could think about was Deku’s shaggy green hair tickling his arm and the life in Deku’s bright green eyes. Something flickered there for a fraction of a second. If Katsuki had blinked, he would have missed it, but he didn’t and he saw it. A familiar longing. A coded plea. The same look Deku gave him in his nightmares just before he broke into full freefall.

 

It was the silent cry of someone begging to be saved.

 

He’s still in there.

 

Deku squirmed beneath Katsuki’s iron grip, so Katsuki pressed into him harder, their chests so close that Katsuki could feel the beat of Deku’s heart. It was racing, just like Katsuki’s.

 

“Izuku…” Katsuki whispered gruffly, loosening his grip ever so slightly.

 

But his hands had grown slick with sweat without him noticing, and the moment he let his guard down even just a little, Deku broke free. He shoved Katsuki back with impressive force and slammed him up against the wall with four fingers at his throat.

 

Deku’s eyes were dark again. Hollow. Any hint of pleading or longing snuffed out by the rage burning there now.

 

“Now it’s my turn to tell you not to call me that,” Deku growled. “Izuku Midoriya died a long time ago. Jumped off a building. You might have heard about it.”

 

Katsuki flinched as the crack of Deku’s body hitting the pavement rang in his ears.

 

“You want me to call you Deku?” Katsuki asked, hating how fragile his voice sounded. Regular villains never had this effect on him. He laughed in their faces more often than not. Why did Deku make him feel so utterly weak?

 

“But of course,” Deku purred. “It is my villain name, after all. I thought it was fitting. Since you’re my archnemesis.”

 

Katsuki wrinkled his brow. The way he said archnemesis rang a bell in Katsuki’s mind. It sounded like a breadcrumb, like a clue leading him to something, but he didn’t know what it was.

 

There was something strange about Deku’s face as well that Katsuki hadn’t noticed when he’d been so fixated on the life in his eyes. His skin. It wasn’t the soft, smooth skin of the boy who had chased him around their entire childhood. It was rough and leathery. Scarred? Perhaps. It was hard to tell in the dim light of his bedroom, but there was definitely something off about it.

 

“What do you mean by that?” Katsuki asked. “Archnemesis.”

 

“Oh, you aren’t really in the position to be asking any more questions now, Katsuki.” Deku tapped his fingers against Katsuki’s neck, each tap sending shivers throughout his entire body.

 

Wait a second. Deku had a quirk now. Katsuki couldn’t believe it had taken this long for that outrageous fact to seep into his consciousness. How does Deku have a quirk now?

 

“What villain?” Katsuki demanded.

 

Deku smirked, digging his four fingers into the tender skin of Katsuki’s throat. “ Still with the questions?”

 

“What villain rescued you? Brought you back to life?”

 

Deku chuckled. “You’ll meet my master soon enough. In fact, he’s the only reason I haven’t already killed you.”

 

Katsuki wrinkled his brow. What in the actual fuck?

 

But before he could press any further, a click and a creak coming from the other room drew Deku’s attention away. He released Katsuki, slipping into the shadows of the bedroom.

 

Was it another villain? Maybe one of Deku’s buddies? Or it could be Eijirou. He’d forgotten to check in with him again earlier in the day about Shouto’s whereabouts.

 

To Katsuki’s immense relief, it was All Might’s voice that trickled in through the darkened doorway, not much louder than a whisper. “Young Bakugou? Are you…decent?”

 

“Uh, yeah…” Katsuki looked around the room, but Deku had vanished. The sheer white curtains framing his now-open bedroom window billowed in the breeze.

Notes:

Ahh this is one of those scenes I was thinking about before I started writing this fic that I was sooo excited to write. I love the angst, the enemies to lovers of it all...and archenemies no less. What does that mean?? Can't say just yet, but it's definitely something... Sorry this chapter was on the shorter side, but the last one was a little long, so I figured it evens out. Hope you enjoyed it!

Chapter 5: Rage, Rage

“He was here!” Katsuki screamed, ripping the blankets and pillows from his bed in a fit of rage. “He was fucking here!”

 

All Might wrinkled his brow, keeping his voice low and calm as though he was trying to keep from stoking the fire of Katsuki’s absurd fury. “Who was here?”

 

Katsuki paused to shoot his mentor a wild stare. “Who do you think?!”

 

“The young man from the bar?”

 

“No! Well, yes…but no!” Katsuki's eyes widened. “Wait. Cheap Deku!” He rummaged around through the mess of bed linens on the floor, but he came up empty handed. “Fuck! The bastard took his clothes.”

 

“Young Bakugou, please calm down. You’re really worrying me.”

 

“You don’t understand!” Katsuki roared, a small explosion erupting in the palm of his fist. “I know you’re going to think I’ve lost my mind, but…it was Deku. He was right here!”

 

All Might sighed, taking a seat on the naked mattress. “I was worried something like this might happen. That’s actually why I didn’t wait until morning to stop by.”

 

“What? You knew he was alive?!” Katsuki’s gaze was crazed, a pair of crimson wildfires.

 

Shaking his head, All Might patted the seat next to him. “He isn’t alive, Young Bakugou.”

 

Katsuki scoffed exasperatedly. Of course All Might didn’t believe him. He wouldn’t have believed it himself if he hadn’t seen the green of Deku’s eyes, felt the heat of Deku’s breath, heard the sweet melody of his voice now deep and coarse with age.

 

“You just got confused,” All Might continued evenly. “You had a little too much to drink, and the young man you brought here looked a lot like him—”

 

“He looked nothing like him. Not even close.”

 

“Young Bakugou…”

 

“Oh god… He killed him.” That fact hadn’t truly settled into Katsuki’s psyche until that moment. Deku had murdered that guy, turned his body to dust in a matter of seconds. What the fuck kind of quirk even is that?

 

It took Katsuki a second to notice All Might’s frightened stare boring into him. “Did you do something, Young Bakugou? If some sort of accident happened… You can tell me. We’ll figure this out together.”

 

“Why won’t you listen to me?!” Katsuki shouted, punching a crater into his wooden headboard. “Deku is alive! He’s a villain, for fuck’s sake! And he killed that guy, not me obviously! Why would I kill the guy I brought back here to fuck?!”

 

All Might stifled a cringe, but stayed silent. He stood from the bed and headed toward the door.

 

“Where are you going?” Katsuki asked sharply.

 

“To get you something to drink. You really need to calm down.”

 

“Come back with water, and I’ll blow up this whole building.”

 

All Might nodded curtly, disappearing into the shadows beyond the door. He returned a few moments later with two glasses in one hand and a bottle of sake in the other. He poured sake into both of the glasses and handed one to Katsuki.

 

“You’re drinking tonight, too?” Katsuki asked, downing his glass in two gulps.

 

All Might sighed. “You aren’t the only one who needs to calm down.”

 

Katsuki’s nerves felt like fire beneath his skin. It wasn’t like All Might to drink. Like it was actually unheard of, ever since he passed One for All on to Katsuki all those years ago.

 

“Fine. But just one glass,” Katsuki grumbled.

 

All Might chuckled, taking a sip of his wine. Katsuki took the bottle from him and poured himself a second glass. He drank this one slower, sipping, letting the strong taste dance on his tongue.

 

There was something strange about it. Not the taste, but something…

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow as he swallowed, finally realizing what was off about it. “Did you bring this?”

 

All Might chuckled. “Of course not. Why?”

 

“It’s warm. You got it from the fridge?”

 

“No, it was sitting out on the kitchen counter. I figured you picked it up on your way home.” All Might lifted his glass to his lips, but Katsuki swatted it away, sending it tumbling to the floor. “Come on, Young Bakugou. I know I shouldn’t be drinking but it’s just one glass…” His voice trailed off as he met Katsuki’s crimson gaze.

 

White hot panic coursed through Katsuki, shortening his breath and draining the color from his face. His mind was already turning fuzzy, his vision blurred and spotty.

 

“What’s wrong?” All Might asked, his eyes glazed with concern.

 

Katsuki grunted as the world went dark and closed in around him. “S’not my wine…”

Katsuki shivered as he stirred awake, his mind still fogged from the lingering effects of the poison he consumed. Well, I’m not dead. That’s good, at least.

 

Forcing his eyes open, his sight quickly adjusted to the dim light around him. The room was made of concrete, mostly bare other than a few dusty bookshelves and a set of stairs in the far corner.

 

Katsuki shivered. Why am I so damn cold? Memories flashed through his mind as he looked down at his naked body still only covered in the towel wrapped around his waist. Getting out of the shower. Cheap Deku crumbling. The malicious gleam in Deku’s eyes.

 

Deku…

 

Katsuki needed to get out of there. If Deku was behind this, there was no telling what other villains he had teamed up with. The best course of action was to escape and regroup with All Might.

 

All Might! Oh, fuck. All Might had been with him when he’d ingested the poison. Hell, he’d even drunk some himself, even if only a little. Where was he? Did they take him, too?

 

Ready to stand up and get the fuck out of there, Katsuki quickly realized his arms had been bound above his head. He looked up, inspecting the metal cuffs completely covering his hands and forearms. The chains tethering them reached all the way up to the ceiling.

 

“What sadistic fuck left me naked when they chained me up?” Katsuki grumbled.

 

“Guilty as charged,” Deku hissed, stepping out from the shadows beside one of the bookshelves.

 

The sight of him made Katsuki’s breath hitch in his throat. He still couldn’t believe Deku was really alive, breathing, standing before him with emeralds gleaming in the dim light. He looked like an angel of death, a black cloak slung around his shoulders with its hood pulled over his shaggy green locks.

 

Most would probably tremble in fear at such a sight, especially knowing what quirk he wielded, but Katsuki felt nothing of the sort. Instead, two overwhelming emotions came over him like a pair of waves crashing into each other, battling for dominance of his soul—relief and unyielding rage.

 

The shock wore thin in Katsuki’s body, giving way to powerful opposing urges as he glared at that mouth he wanted to punch and kiss in the very same breath. He met Deku’s stare, molten rubies meeting those steely emeralds. He couldn’t help but feel grateful for the chance to see those emeralds again, alight with life rather than falling to their death in his vicious memories, but…

 

…he couldn’t ignore the rage broiling in his gut, now unbearable without the precious alcohol he’d used to douse it.

 

How did Deku do it? Stay alive all these years without so much as a call, a message, a single fucking word to ease Katsuki’s suffering? He must’ve known, must’ve seen the troubles he’d succumbed to. They’d been all over the TV and internet. Drunken mishaps, sex scandals, more bar fights than he could even count.

 

Didn’t Deku know that all of that was the result of his damned memory, his fucking eyes haunting him every night, keeping him from restful sleep, keeping him staring through the bottom of a bottle nearly every waking moment?

 

You told him to kill himself. You did this to yourself. You killed him. Him being alive now doesn’t change any of that. Some villain did what neither of the number one heroes could. How the fuck can you still call yourself a hero, now?

 

“Something wrong, Katsuki?” Deku challenged, jolting Katsuki back from his downward spiral. He tugged on his chains, commanding One for All to activate and break him free.

 

But nothing happened. He tried to set off an explosion, but still…nothing.

 

“The fuck?” Katsuki spat, a pang of fear striking in his chest.

 

Deku smirked. “Those restraints were produced with quirk-cancelling technology, if that’s what you’re wondering. I’m sure you have a lot of questions, actually. And as much as I’d love to sit here and watch you try to figure everything out, I have things to see and people to do…”

 

Katsuki laughed in spite of himself. “Don’t you mean things to do and people to see?”

 

“I don’t know. Do I?” Deku pulled back the hood of his cloak, his smile now gleaming in the low light.

 

God, why did the curl of his mouth, the gruffness of his voice, the hint of mischief in his eyes make heat pool in the pit of Katsuki’s gut?

 

He hated Deku. He always had. Growing up, he hated him for his baseless ambition, so much so that he bullied him to the point of suicide. Ever since, he’d hated him for ruining his life, for haunting his dreams and for being the heavy vise he carried around every waking moment. And now, he hated him the most. Because he was here and he was real and Katsuki had wasted all those years weighed down by the guilt and anguish of a death that had already been remedied, though never really atoned for.

 

Katsuki would have to kill himself if he ever really wished to atone for it.

 

And right about now, as his body grew warm and his blood pumped faster, forming a familiar throb somewhere beneath the thin fabric wrapped around his midsection, right about now he wished he would’ve just atoned for it all those years ago. Before All Might had grown too weak with age to take One for All back. Before he had spent all those years torturing himself with booze and sex and reckless violence. Before he had achieved the rank of number one hero, a title he knew he’d never deserve.

 

“Just do it already,” Katsuki growled, despising the way his cheeks flushed as Deku took another step toward him.

 

“Do what, Kacchan ?”

 

Fuck… Why did hearing that name on those lips feel like lightning on Katsuki’s bare skin? Forget Deku’s death, forget the years of torture that stemmed from it, forget the crook of Deku’s neck and the bulge of his muscles peaking out from beneath that velvety black cloak…

 

Deku was a villain now. And despite his incessant self-hatred, Katsuki was a hero. And heroes don’t get with villains, no matter their past nor their present nor how sexy they look with their hair all long and disheveled.

 

God, Katsuki needed to get a grip.

 

Seriously, what the hell was going on with him? He needed to get the fuck out of there. Right then. Before he did something really fucking stupid.

 

Katsuki yanked on the cuffs with all his raw strength, but they held firm. Deku strode toward him, his mouth still puckered in a playful smirk. Katsuki tensed as Deku knelt beside him, his body screaming beneath the stare of those captivating emeralds.

 

“Stop being a bitch and just kill me already,” Katsuki sneered, hoping Deku didn’t catch the tremble in his tone.

 

“Oh, I’d love nothing more than to do just that,” Deku purred. “But I told you, my master isn’t done with you yet.”

 

“Well, can he get a fucking move on? It’s cold as shit in here.”

 

Deku chuckled, leaning in even closer to whisper to Katsuki. “You don’t seem cold. In fact, it looks like you’re sweating. Too bad you can’t use your quirk right now, huh?”

 

He was close. So close. Too fucking close. The heat of his breath tickled Katsuki’s neck.

 

In that moment, Katsuki wanted nothing more than to close that tiny fucking distance. The flick of Deku's tongue as he spoke, the ever-present smirk adorning his lips, the sharp point where his jawline met the smooth skin of his neck, god Katsuki was hungry for all of it. Fucking starving.

 

Get your fucking shit together! Katsuki averted his gaze, taking deep breaths in through his nose and out through his mouth. He tried to focus on his rage, tried to remember the hatred he fostered for his green-eyed archnemesis, but that didn’t slow the speeding of his heart nor the pulse pounding in his groin.

 

“I’ll make you a deal,” Deku whispered. “As soon as my transformation is over, and I return your precious One for All to its rightful owner, I’ll rot your body and turn your bones to dust. How does that sound?”

 

A thrum of panic rippled in Katsuki’s chest. How the fuck did Deku know about One for All? Transformation? Rightful owner? What the fuck was Deku talking about?

 

“What the fuck—”

 

Katsuki’s voice faltered as a pair of icy lips crashed into his, and the world around him ceased to exist.

Notes:

Ahh things are getting a little spicy! It took me a minute (and a lot of staring at a blank screen) to come up with this last scene, but I'm really digging the direction this is heading. I love how Katsuki is such a villain Deku simp (I mean, aren't we all though?!) Super excited to get started on the next chapter, too. It's about time we get a bit of Deku's perspective I think. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this one! And thank you SO MUCH for reading and sticking with this wild ride! ^^

Chapter 6: Criminal Mind

Katsuki didn’t move as Deku’s mouth warmed against his, parting and licking and gnashing. The kiss was aggressive, the quench of a craving, the lips of feral beasts rather than whatever they actually were.

 

Maybe they were beasts, mindless creatures.

 

Because if Katsuki had a brain or a single thought in his head, he wouldn’t have enjoyed this nearly as much.

 

Every muscle in Katsuki’s body was tense with restraint, fighting the fiery need burning all throughout him. He didn’t want this. He couldn’t want this. But god , he did. He fucking wanted it. Wanted it more than anything he’d ever desired in his entire life. Wanted it more than air or food or water.

 

Wanted it more than being a hero.

 

Deku flicked his tongue against Katsuki’s and softly sucked on his lower lip. Katsuki let out a faint groan that brought a smile to Deku’s lips as he deepened the kiss, knotting his fingers in Katsuki’s hair.

 

Well, we’ve already pretty much passed the point of no return. Might as well make the most of it.

 

Katsuki strained against the cuffs binding him to the ceiling and bared his teeth, his lips migrating downward. Deku let out a low whimper as Katsuki bit down and sucked on the soft skin just beneath his jawline. He tilted his head, exposing more of his neck for Katsuki to devour.

 

Tugging on the chains again, Katsuki grunted in frustration. He wanted more. Wanted to grab those gorgeous green curls and caress the bare skin beckoning him from beneath that velvety cloak. He wanted to pull Deku closer, to slam him to the ground and claim his dominance.

 

But Katsuki was the one chained in place. Deku held all the power, and judging by the way he yanked Katsuki’s head back from his neck and planted another ravenous kiss on his lips, he fucking knew it.

 

And fuck , if that didn’t just make Katsuki harder.

 

His anger, his hatred, his guilt, even his fucking morality…everything that made up Bakugou Katsuki had been replaced with a need so intense it was nearly unbearable, a thread stretched so thin it could’ve snapped at any moment. If his hands had been free, he was sure he would have blown the whole room to hell.

 

Then suddenly, Deku pulled away.

 

He rose to his feet in one swift motion, leaving Katsuki aching with unrequited desire. A chill fell over him, and he quaked beneath Deku’s unreadable stare. Oh shit. What the fuck just happened? Is this even real? What if I’m just having a fever dream from the poison? Or worse, what if the poison killed me, and this is my hell?

 

“Sorry,” Deku muttered gruffly. Something flickered in his eyes, a memory, a shadow of the boy Katsuki used to know.

 

He’s still in there. A shiver ran down Katsuki’s spine. I can still save him. I can still be a hero.

 

His hero.

 

“Sorry?” Katsuki asked, a half-hearted bite to his tone. “The fuck you have to be sorry for?”

 

Deku straightened his back and lowered his brow, his gaze hardening. “Nothing at all. I just…wanted to see what that was like. And now I know.” He turned on his heel and stalked toward the stairs on the far side of the room.

 

“Where’re you going?” Katsuki demanded.

 

Deku chuckled, glancing over his shoulder as he began ascending the stairs. “I’ll have someone bring you some clothes. You look downright indecent.”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Deku shouted, punching his bathroom mirror and fragmenting his reflection. “You kissed him! You fucking kissed him! Have you lost your damn mind?!”

 

A flash of red drew Deku’s attention away from his shattered reflection. Blood poured from his knuckles, the same shade as Kacchan’s eyes.

 

Seriously, what the fuck was he thinking? I wasn’t thinking. That’s the whole fucking problem.

 

Deku grabbed a hand towel from the hook beside the sink and wrapped his injured hand, wincing as the soft fabric rubbed against his open wound.

 

He had no idea what had come over him down in the basement, but he knew it wasn’t his fault. Not completely, anyway.

 

Deku hadn’t asked for Kacchan to be kidnapped practically naked. That was just an unfortunate circumstance. He hadn’t asked for that glint of hunger in Kacchan’s eyes, nor the way he clenched his jaw, like he was holding back some primal urge. He hadn’t asked for Kacchan to be the hottest man alive. Like literally. He was on the cover of a magazine and everything. Not that Deku had a copy of that magazine in the drawer of his nightstand. Nope. That would be crazy.

 

Was that what Deku was? Crazy? He glanced back at his distorted reflection in the cracked mirror. He certainly looked crazy in that moment, with his hair even more disheveled than usual and his eyes wide and bloodshot.

 

Lifting a hand, Deku caressed his cheek. He hated how leathery his skin had become in such a short time. Just ten years, and he already looked like he was withering away. All for One had told him to expect that.

 

It was common for people he gifted quirks to have some side effects, since their bodies weren’t made to withstand them, but Deku’s quirk took a particularly drastic toll on his body. Decay. That was the name of his quirk. It seemed fitting, since that’s how he saw the world. Rotten. Ready to be thrown out and replaced with a new world, one where heroes were seen for the villains they really were.

 

One where even a quirkless kid could shine.

 

Deku smiled, running a hand through his coarse green curls and brushing them back away from his face. He wouldn’t have to suffer this borrowed quirk much longer. Soon All for One would begin his transformation, and all of their plans would finally come to fruition.

 

But…

 

Deku’s smile faltered. Why was it always like this? Why couldn’t he just be happy and hopeful? Why was it, whenever he imagined the glorious future All for One had planned for them, he couldn’t staunch the nagging sense of dread in the back of his mind? It had been there all these years, born the moment All Might crushed his dreams. The moment he’d turned away from the light and leapt into the shadows.

 

Deku was a murderer in many ways. He’d killed people, sure, but he’d also killed ideals, morals, even other people’s dreams, as revenge for All Might’s mistreatment. However, the one thing he could never seem to destroy was his utter humanity , though he did manage to bury so deep within himself that nobody else could see it, not even his master.

 

And yet…

 

He couldn’t be sure, but he had a feeling Kacchan had seen it. Kacchan of all people. The boy who stole his childhood, who tortured him just because he didn’t have a quirk, just because he dared to dream of becoming a hero. The boy who grew up to live those dreams, who got everything Deku had ever wanted.

 

The boy who got chosen by All Might himself, to inherit his power and become the next Symbol of Peace.

 

That boy had seen him , if only for a second, and Deku despised him for it. How dare he, how fucking dare he look at him like that after all these years. He didn’t deserve to see, didn’t deserve to know anything about Deku, let alone his most carefully kept secret—that despite his deadened exterior, his heart was still beating, strong and tender, racing and skipping and aching.

 

And somehow, Deku knew that Kacchan had seen that, seen through his lifeless facade into that hidden piece of him that was still warm and breathing, and that terrified him. What would Kacchan do, knowing Deku’s biggest weakness? How would he use it against him?

 

Who would he tell?

 

Deku shuddered. Maybe nobody will believe him anyway. The thought didn’t offer much relief, though. Deku was treading in dangerous territory, and he had no idea how to get out of it without exposing himself further. But instead of curling up in a ball and crying like he would have when he was younger, Deku did what All for One had taught him and turned his fear into fury.

 

Anger broiled in Deku’s gut as he stomped into his bedroom. He threw open the french doors on the far side of the room and stepped out onto his balcony. The evening was warm and balmy, and the sky was streaked with brilliant orange as the sun dipped below the city skyline.

 

Taking a deep breath, Deku leaned over the banister to gaze down at the buzzing streets three stories below. His heart sped, his blood like lightning in his veins. He knew what it would feel like to fall, to hit the ground and feel the world melt away into frigid blackness. Was that what he really wanted? For everything just to stop, for good this time? There would be pain, sure, but then maybe, just maybe, there would also be peace.

 

Deku’s heart skipped a beat as a pair of crimson eyes flashed in his mind.

 

Why? WHY? Why was he thinking of them now? Why did they make him flinch away from the banister? Why did they make his pulse pound so loud he could hear it in his ears? Why did they make him want to die, but also…make him want to live ?

 

“This again?”

 

Deku whipped around, gripping the railing tightly to keep from falling off the balcony.

 

“I wasn’t going to do it this time,” Deku mumbled.

 

All for One stepped into the doorway, the tilt of his head like an accusation. “You know I’d just bring you back again. You can’t escape your destiny, Deku.”

 

“I said I wasn’t going to do it. Just drop it!” Deku shoved past his master and marched back into his bedroom.

 

All for One pivoted, shutting the french doors behind him. “You want something.”

 

Deku paused halfway across the room. He didn’t turn to meet his master’s gaze. “What do you mean?”

 

“You want something, probably something you think you can’t have.”

 

“What makes you say that?”

 

“You think I don’t know my own successor?”

 

Deku finally turned. Though All for One’s mouth was hidden beneath his metal mouthpiece, Deku could hear the smile in his tone. “So what if I do?” he asked, his lips puckering in a stifled smirk.

 

“You already know my views on the matter,” All for One said. “If you want something, you fucking take it.”

 

“Even if it’s sort of…reprehensible?”

 

“Do you not realize who you’re talking to?”

 

Deku chewed on his bottom lip to keep from grinning.

The concrete box of a basement was warmer now that Katsuki wasn’t naked. In fact, it was a little too warm for his liking with the skin tight black sweater and heavy cargo pants he woke up in. Had they taken his cuffs off in his sleep?

 

Katsuki’s head pounded and sweat poured from his temples. He didn’t normally go this long without a drink and the hangover and withdrawals were starting to take effect. If he hadn’t felt like such absolute shit, he probably could have woken up and escaped when whatever creep came and dressed him.

 

Was it Deku? He hated how the idea of Deku sliding this tight sweater over his naked body made his pulse migrate south. What the fuck had gotten into him? Stop thinking about fucking Deku, and start figuring out how to get the fuck out of here.

 

Katsuki nearly jumped out of his skin at the sound of a door slamming at the top of the stairs, followed by a series of heavy footsteps. As Deku landed on the dusty basement floor, he kept moving forward, bolting toward Katsuki with a battlecry in his eyes.

 

Oh shit…

 

Katsuki was on his feet in an instant, hoisting himself up by the chains of his restraints. Even with his hands tied behind his back, he wouldn’t go down without a fight. His body tensed as Deku got close. With any other villain, he would’ve dodged easily, but the look in Deku’s eyes had him frozen.

 

Because Deku didn’t actually look like he wanted to kill him. He looked like he wanted to devour him whole.

 

It didn’t surprise Katsuki when Deku lifted his foot and kicked him square in the chest, but it did jolt him from his stupor when Deku didn’t stop moving forward. Deku slammed Katsuki into the wall and grabbed the back of his head, pulling him closer until their mouths met.

 

Katsuki’s mind went blank once more. He was no longer a man with skin and bones and a mind. He had turned into an empty vessel aching with need, and Deku seemed to be the only thing that could satiate him.

 

Deku grabbed the neck of Katsuki’s shirt, and it crumbled to dust in his palm. He kissed his way down Katsuki’s neck to his chest where he bit down. Hard.

 

Katsuki moaned, louder than he meant to. “Why?” he asked in a gravelly tone, not that he really cared. Not that he even knew what he was saying anymore. Fuck , how did Deku do it, turn him into this limp pile of need with just a look?

 

“Shut the fuck up,” Deku snarled against Katsuki’s bare skin.

 

This was getting dangerous. Katsuki shouldn’t want this. He should want to defeat Deku, to capture him or destroy him or at the very least escape, but…in that moment, he didn’t want to be anywhere but right there.

 

I’m so fucked.

Notes:

Ahhh okay now its getting really spicyy, and it'll only get spicier from here I'm afraid ^^ I love how they both have such mixed emotions about each other and the situation. The rage, sure that's understandable, but something else too...something I don't think they even really realize yet. I know I always say this, but omgg am I excited for the next chapter. Thank you so much for reading! I really hope you're enjoying it.

Chapter 7: Bloodlust

Katsuki shivered as Deku’s lips found their way back to his own, ice meeting fire, each pulling the other toward comfortable warmth. Deku’s hand found its way to Katsuki’s pec, pinching his nipple and coaxing a moan from the explosive man.

 

Katsuki willed Deku to meet his gaze. He wanted to search that emerald stare, to see that ghost he’d seen before, but Deku only looked down as his fingers slipped beneath the waistband of Katsuki’s pants. He didn’t decay them, though. Rather, he ripped them open and pulled them down as he sank to his knees.

 

Katsuki stared down at Deku’s mess of green curls as he grabbed Katsuki’s mounting erection.

 

Why won’t he look at m— Fuck…

 

The air rushed from Katsuki’s lungs in the form of a guttural groan as Deku ran his tongue along the length of his shaft and around the tip. God, Katsuki would have killed to have his hands free, to pull back that shaggy green mop, to see those gorgeous emeralds and that snarky mouth wrapped around him.

 

But instead, all Katsuki could do was feel, so he closed his eyes and gave himself over to his cold captor.

 

His breath grew shallow as Deku sucked his cock, taking more and more in with each slow bob of his head. It drove Katsuki fucking crazy, that agonizingly slow rhythm. He wanted more, wanted everything, but he’d be damned if he let Deku see the power he held in that moment.

 

As if he didn’t already know.

 

Deku thrust his head forward, taking Katsuki’s entire length in his mouth and throat. Katsuki gasped, surprised by the sudden rush of warmth and pleasure coursing through him. Deku pulled back, smiling and licking at Katsuki’s tip.

 

He called softly, “You like that, Kacchan ?”

 

Katsuki moaned, his voice growing louder as Deku sucked down his length again. God, why did just the sound of his name on Deku’s lips make him lose all sense? Nobody had ever made him feel so vulnerable, laid bare and ready for the taking. And Deku of all people? The person he should hate, he has hated, for nearly his entire life?

 

Well, he couldn’t be sure he hated him anymore…perhaps he never really did.

 

No. He did hate him. He had to hate him, for the years of guilt-ridden torment, for the lies he’d told and the lives he’d taken and the time he’d stolen. Even at only twenty-five, Katsuki knew his best years were already behind him. Wasted. Because of…

 

A whimper escaped Katsuki’s throat as Deku pulled away from him, leaving him aching for more. Katsuki wanted to beg for more, and he fucking hated that notion more than anything else.

 

“Don’t worry,” Deku purred, rising to his feet. “We aren’t done yet.” He finally met Katsuki’s gaze, but those emeralds were icy and hollow.

 

His walls are up. Katsuki mused. But I can tear them down, if I can just get my damn hands free.

 

Katsuki flinched, a sharp pain erupting in his neck. He glanced down to see Deku’s hand grasping a needle, injecting something into his bloodstream.

 

Shit! What was in that syringe? More poison? Was this all just some sort of twisted trick, to kill Katsuki once and for all? No. That didn’t make any sense. Deku could’ve killed Katsuki whenever he wanted with his quirk. He didn’t need to use an injection.

 

Deku smirked. “Calm down. Your eyes look like they’re about to fall out of their sockets. This is just a precaution.”

 

“What is it?” Katsuki grunted.

 

“It’s a quirk-cancelling serum.”

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow. “Isn’t that what the cuffs are for?”

 

“It was.” Deku lifted his hands above Katsuki’s head and grabbed the cuffs, turning them to dust. Katsuki’s arms fell to his sides, numb from being hung above his head for so long. Before he had the chance to process what was happening, Deku’s hand was at his throat. “If you try to run, I’ll kill you where you stand.”

 

Run? Katsuki hadn’t even considered it. Why hadn’t he considered it? He should’ve. He’s a prisoner here, after all. But he could still feel Deku’s warmth on his dick, and he wanted fucking more .

 

“I don’t want to run,” Katsuki admitted gruffly.

 

Deku narrowed his stare, as though he was trying to decipher Katsuki’s expression. “Even if you get past me, I have guards stationed at the top of the stairs.”

 

“Won’t they hear us?” Katsuki breathed the words before he had a chance to think about them. Really? Out of all the things to consider about at a time like this, that’s what his brain decided was of the utmost importance? He really needed to have a serious talk with himself once all the blood in his body wasn’t throbbing in his groin.

 

Deku sneered, a playful glint dancing in his eyes. “It’d be a shame if they didn’t.”

 

Deku hesitantly lowered his hand, and Katsuki was on him in an instant. Still recovering from the numbness, Katsuki’s arms stung as he tore off Deku’s cloak, but he barely even felt the pain. His hands were free, and he was more than ready to use them.

 

Wrapping his arm around Deku’s waist, Katsuki pulled him close, his body smooth against Deku’s rough skin. He tangled his fingers in Deku’s hair, tilting his head back and kissing him mercilessly. Deku’s mouth fought back, a battle of wills and tongues and teeth.

 

Deku was ravenous, but Katsuki was downright bloodthirsty. He bit down on Deku’s lip, his chin, his jaw, all the way down to his neck where he sucked, and Deku couldn’t keep the moan from escaping his throat. Katsuki smiled, kissing the bruise forming on Deku’s pale skin.

 

Katsuki spun Deku around to face away from him, kissing his collarbone as he unbuttoned his black jeans and shimmied them down low on his hips. He slipped his hand beneath Deku’s boxers. Deku groaned as Katsuki began stroking his cock, lifting his hand to latch onto the back of Katsuki’s neck.

 

“You like that, Deku?” Katsuki growled, mimicking Deku’s earlier sentiment.

 

Deku’s voice came out barely above a whisper. “Just shut up and fuck me already, Kacchan.”

 

Katsuki chuckled darkly. “No, no. You aren’t getting off that easily.”

 

“Like hell I’m not.” Deku grabbed a fistful of his pants and boxers, disintegrating them in half a second. He grinded his hips into Katsuki, his bare ass now rubbing against Katsuki’s dick.

 

Fuck…have some self control. You are capable of self control.

 

Deku tore himself away from Katsuki’s hold and strode over to the nearest bookshelf. He threw open one of the cabinets lining the bottom and grabbed a couple things, tossing them at Katsuki’s feet—a condom and a bottle of lube.

 

Katsuki arched his brow. “You fucking a lot of prisoners down here, Deku?”

 

“No,” Deku said, a challenge in his tone that made Katsuki’s pulse pound even harder. “Just you.” He grabbed the bookshelf and threw it to the floor on its side.

 

Katsuki’s gaze darted between the bookshelf and Deku’s daring glare.

 

Okay. Yeah, no. Fuck self control.

 

Katsuki’s legs moved so fast he almost could’ve sworn One for All activated for a fraction of a second as he closed the distance between him and Deku. His hands trembled as he grabbed Deku’s shoulders and bent him over the side of the bookcase. Trembled? Yes, trembled , and it wasn’t only his hands. His whole body trembled as he dropped to his knees, that primal need thundering through him like an earthquake. Even still, as he seized power and dominance, spreading cheeks and burying his face between them, he was weak for Deku. This was bad, so fucking bad, but that was a problem for later Katsuki, clear-headed Katsuki, a Katsuki who wasn’t tongue-deep in Deku’s ass.

 

“Holy fucking shit,” Deku panted. “Come on, Kacchan…”

 

Katsuki swirled his tongue around Deku’s asshole, eliciting a low groan of pleasure from both of them. “You want something, Deku?”

 

“Yes…” Deku gasped, his voice quieting to a whisper. “Please…”

 

Oh, so we’re begging now. Something about that made Katsuki’s pulse pound even harder. He just about blew his load right then and there, but by the force of sheer willpower, he held it back as he leaned over and grabbed the condom and the bottle of lube he’d left on the floor. His shaft throbbed as he tore the foil with his teeth and slipped the condom on.

 

Wetting his hand with the lube, Katsuki slipped a finger inside Deku, then another, in and out, speeding up with the race of his heartbeat.

 

Deku moaned, leaning into him. “Dammit, Kacchan, fuck me! Please…”

 

Fuck, okay, yeah. Katsuki couldn’t wait any longer either. It took everything he had not to cum as he grabbed his cock and brought the tip to Deku’s entrance.

 

Self control… You are in control… Who was Katsuki kidding? Even from the bottom, Deku held every ounce of power over him. If he had access to his quirks in this moment, he would have turned this room to rubble and likely whatever building was above them along with it. God, he was so fucked, and the worst part? He literally couldn’t have given less of a shit.

 

Katsuki damn near screamed as he slid inside Deku, pleasure coursing in his bloodless veins, a pleasure so intense he wasn’t sure he’d ever actually felt pleasure in his life before. He gripped Deku’s hips to keep his knees from buckling, waves of ecstasy crashing over him as he slid in further.

 

Deku groaned, clenching his fists and arching his back to provide a better angle for Katsuki’s slow thrusts, each one a little deeper than the last.

 

Deku was tight, but his face was slack, as though he was just as lost in the thralls of pleasure as Katsuki. Who you been fucking, Deku? The thought plagued Katsuki’s mind, no matter how hard he tried to ignore it. Why did he care who else had been in this position, balls-deep, coaxing moans from that smart mouth?

 

He hated Deku. They weren’t making love. This was hate fucking, and nothing more.

 

Well, if that was the case, Katsuki didn’t have any reason to hold back the beast snarling within him. He thrusted harder, faster, grinding his cock into Deku’s prostate. Deku bleated, slapping his palms down flat on the bookcase and digging his fingers into the wood.

 

“Oh shit…” Deku whispered as the wood began to decay beneath his hands.

 

Katsuki pulled out just in time for Deku to land on the ground on all-fours. Katsuki knelt behind him and slipped back inside him without skipping a beat.

 

Katsuki could have done this forever, gripping Deku’s ass in one hand and grabbing the back of his head with the other, feeling himself fill Deku so completely. It was fucking heaven , but dammit he still wanted more. He wanted to see Deku’s face, see those gorgeous eyes roll back in blinding pleasure.

 

Yeah, so much for hate fucking.

 

Whatever. Katsuki didn’t care. He wanted it, and he was going to fucking get it.

 

Katsuki grunted, pulling out again. “Lay on your back.”

 

“Why?” Deku asked between heavy breaths.

 

“I want to see your face.”

 

Deku turned, his curls plastered to the sweat on his forehead. “Why?”

 

Katsuki arched his brow. “Does it matter?”

 

Deku panted, hesitating, looking away from Katsuki. God, why won’t he just fucking look at me?  

 

After a moment that felt like an eternity, Deku finally surrendered, flipping over and lying on his back with his head still turned to the side. His curls fell across his face, framing his cheek and eye. He looked so beautiful splayed out like that, Katsuki felt the sudden urge to cry. What the fuck? Why did he want to cry? He should be angry, should want to hurt Deku as badly as Deku had hurt him, but he didn’t.

 

In fact, all he wanted to do was make Deku feel good. To make him scream Katsuki’s name. To make him smile and maybe even laugh. Deku used to smile. He used to laugh, eyes alight with life and hope and purpose. Katsuki wanted that Deku. Was he still in there, buried beneath this broken shell of a man?

 

Deku closed his eyes as Katsuki climbed on top of him and slid inside him again. This time, Katsuki went slow and deep, each thrust like a prayer, Katsuki’s silent plea. Look at me. Please.

 

“Oh my god,” Deku muttered, slamming his head flat on the floor and arching his back. He grabbed Katsuki’s wrists on either side of his head, rocking his hips along with Katsuki’s movements, bringing him even deeper.

 

“Fuck, Deku…” Katsuki whispered. “Please, just fucking look at me.”

 

Time slowed to a crawl as Deku lowered his chin. His eyes flashed open, bright and alive and wanting. They weren’t the emeralds from his nightmares, but the ones from before. The ones that followed him and idolized him.

 

The ones that loved him.

 

At that moment, the line between Katsuki and Deku ceased to exist. They were one entity, irreversibly intertwined, almost as if they’d never been separate in the first place. Katsuki could see all that they were and all that they are and all that they could’ve been.

 

Maybe they still could be.

 

And for the first time since Deku threw himself off that damned roof all those years ago— No. For the first time in his entire life , Katsuki felt whole.

 

Deku’s widened eyes glistened. A tear slipped down his cheek, dislodged by the force of Katsuki’s powerful thrusts. Deku could feel it, too. He didn’t have to say anything for Katsuki to know, yet still…

 

“Kacchan…” Deku called softly, and something broke inside Katsuki. It felt as though his chest had been cracked open, his soul spilling from his body and filling Deku. He didn’t even realize he was also crying until a few of his tears dripped down onto Deku’s face.

 

How could he have ever thought he hated Deku? How could he have been so stupid, so blind that he couldn’t see what was right in front of him, what was inside of him, in his own heart, all this time?

 

Katsuki dropped to his elbows. He kissed Deku’s neck all the way up to his ear. “Say my name again.”

 

“Kacchan,” Deku sighed, as though the word relieved him of some enormous weight.

 

Katsuki pressed down on Deku’s shoulders so he could grind into him even harder. “Kacchan,” Deku moaned, and Katsuki moaned, too, a chorus of pleasure. Deku dug his fingernails into Katsuki’s back. His voice shot up an octave, a deafening cry as Katsuki plunged deeper and faster. “Kacchan!”

 

Katsuki couldn’t hold himself back any longer. He let out a gravelly yelp as he came, for the first time truly fucking thankful he couldn’t use his quirk because right then he probably would’ve killed himself and Deku with the explosions cooking in his veins.

 

Deku cupped Katsuki’s cheek and pulled him closer, planting a kiss on his groaning lips. This kiss felt different than before, deeper, more tender, as though Deku was trying to tell him something without using any words.

 

Holding himself up with one arm, Katsuki ran his hand down Deku’s chest and wrapped his fingers around Deku’s cock, stroking it in rhythm with his slowing thrusts. Deku screamed against Katsuki’s lips as he came, their bodies both trembling in sync.

 

Katsuki didn’t want to stop, didn’t want to lose this feeling, this moment. He leaned to the side, landing on the floor beside Deku. He threaded his fingers through Deku’s hair and pulled him in for another kiss.

 

“I should go,” Deku whispered against Katsuki’s mouth.

 

Katsuki’s chest tightened. He ran his thumb along Deku’s jawline, softly pinching his chin. “Please don’t. Not yet.”

 

Katsuki could see Deku’s mind working behind those melted emeralds.

 

“Okay,” he said at last, and Katsuki released a breath he’d been holding for far too long.

Notes:

ahh guys... this is the first time i've ever really written anything like this. I hope it turned out okay and you guys enjoyed it! will these two ever not be the most complicated couple on the planet?? of course not. that's one of the reasons I love them so much ^^ but where do they go from here?? their wild ride is far from over. to be honest, when I originally planned this chapter, I thought the end would be more sad and angsty, but I like the turn it took from Kacchan's pov. Anyway, as always, thank you so much for reading! <33

Chapter 8: What Hurts the Most

Bricks blackened and crumbled, a building flattened to the ground in an instant on an abandoned city block. A guttural shriek erupted from deep within Deku’s gut. He knelt amidst the rubble, his hands gripping the cracked pavement.

 

“FUCK!” Deku screamed, kicking a stray stone spotted with decay. It flew right past a purple-haired man with tired eyes and an apathetic expression.

 

“I can’t believe you fucked him,” the man spat disdainfully.

 

Deku sneered. “Fuck off, Hitoshi. Like you never fucked a hero?”

 

Hitoshi rolled his eyes, tightening the scarf wrapped around his neck. “That asshole isn’t just any hero.”

 

Arching his brow, Deku took a step toward Hitoshi. “What, are you jealous or something?”

 

“No,” Hitoshi quipped a little too quickly. “I’m pissed off because you’re acting like a fucking idiot! Seriously, what were you thinking? You could blow our whole plan with this bullshit!”

 

Deku hated how right he was. Sleeping with Kacchan had complicated damn near every aspect of his life. What had he been thinking? That this would be easy? That they could just fuck and be done with it? That he wouldn’t feel anything? That he could be vulnerable enough to have sex with Kacchan but strong enough to hide his most precious weakness?

 

That he wouldn’t like it?

 

Fuck, no. He knew he would like it. He didn’t know he would fucking love it. Crave it, even now when Kacchan was miles away, like there was an invisible thread tied between them now, tugging him back toward the place he belonged. Did Kacchan feel it, too?

 

“Was it good at least?” Hitoshi asked dryly.

 

“Yeah,” Deku admitted wistfully, “but it was also terrifying.”

 

Hitoshi smirked. “So it was really good, then.”

 

Deku turned away from him without saying another word, barely even breathing. He couldn’t let Hitoshi know just how good it had been. The way Kacchan made him feel , not only pleasure, but also pain and joy and anger and longing and sadness and a million other things all at once. How he’d made Deku feel truly alive for the first time since his death.

 

How he’d broken Deku. How Deku had let him. How he’d wanted him to.

 

“Do you love him?” Hitoshi asked lowly.

 

Deku whipped around to face Hitoshi, baring his teeth in a vicious snarl. “Don’t be fucking ridiculous.”

 

Deku’s heart dropped into his stomach. Why the fuck would Hitoshi ask him something so ludicrous? Love? Deku hadn’t thought about that stupid concept in years, so much so that he’d nearly forgotten about it entirely. In fact, he was pretty sure he wasn’t even capable of it anymore. Being consumed with hatred does that to a person.

 

The problem was, Deku did feel something toward Kacchan now, something that wasn’t hatred. Something warm and inviting. That was the last thing Deku needed right now. To be getting all warm and fuzzy thinking about fucking Kacchan of all people. So instead of indulging this bullshit feeling, Deku decided to do what he did best and buried it deep within himself to be dealt with later. Or better yet, never at all.

 

He could do that. He could ignore this parasitic warmth sizzling in his chest. He could feel nothing but resentment for the boy who tormented him to the point of suicide, as he had for the last decade. Sleeping with Kacchan didn’t change any of that. Didn’t change him.

 

“ Please, just fucking look at me. ”

 

Shit. Who the fuck was he kidding? He hadn’t just slept with Kacchan. Something happened between them, something Deku was far from ready to come to terms with. Something that made him want to rip out Kacchan’s heart with his bare hands, but also make love with him again, over and over, non-stop for the rest of eternity.

 

Dammit! There was that fucking word again. What the hell had gotten into Deku? He’d had sex with plenty of people over the years, Hitoshi included, and he’d never once thought of it as making love . Yet, one look at Kacchan riding him, and…

 

“ Say my name again. ”

 

Deku’s cheeks burned at the memory. He turned his head to try and hide his reddened face from Hitoshi, but he already knew he hadn’t been quick enough.

 

Hitoshi let out a dark chuckle. “Damn, Deku. You’ve got it bad .”

 

“Shut the fuck up,” Deku retorted. “I still want to murder him.”

 

Hitoshi ran his fingers through his wild purple locks. “That’s good. Because while you were fucking the number one hero, I overheard All for One telling Garaki that he’s almost ready for your transformation. Said they’d like to get started in three days.”

 

“Really?” Deku’s heart skipped a beat. He knew the transformation would be soon, but three days? Why did that suddenly make him so nervous? And angry? Perhaps because he felt his master should have given him more warning. Yeah. That had to have been it.

 

“Mhm,” Hitoshi muttered. “So if you want to suck Dynamight’s dick again or whatever before you have to kill him, you better get to it.”

 

Deku’s pulse pounded, his mind abuzz with conflicting thoughts. What did he really want? Vengeance, of course. He wanted to destroy Kacchan, to finally achieve the warped justice he’d been craving all this time. Kacchan deserved it, after all. Nobody could deny that, but…

 

…Deku had other wants now, too. Other cravings.

 

The warmth of Kacchan’s bare chest atop his own. The sweet aroma of Kacchan’s nitroglycerin sweat. Soft lips that kissed him and bit him and groaned his name. The burning glow of his eyes as he shot Deku that stare that transcended time and space and physical being.

 

“ Take a swan dive off the roof of the building. ”

 

Deku’s body stiffened as his mind traveled back in time, back to that day, that classroom, that fucking look on Kacchan’s face and the small explosions popping from his hands as he told Deku he’d be better off dying and hoping for a quirk in his next life.

 

Well, joke’s on you, Kacchan. You got exactly what you wanted, and now this quirkless failure is going to fucking end you.

 

 

Brass decayed beneath Deku’s fingers as he gripped the heavy doorknob of Kacchan’s apartment front door and pushed his way inside. It looked just like it had the last time he’d been there, of course, since he’d dragged Kacchan’s unconscious ass out with him when he’d left.

 

Deku walked around the kitchen, the living room, even Kacchan’s bedroom. They were all immaculate—neat, polished, and stylishly decorated. The only speck of disarray was the bed linens on the floor in the bedroom from where Kacchan had thrown them off. Deku smirked at the memory.

 

Of course this asshole’s home is perfect. Can’t let anyone know how fucked up you are inside, can you, Kacchan?

 

For some reason, the dusted bookshelves and spotless floors and perfectly straight paintings on the walls made Deku want to crumble the entire building to ash. They represented everything he hated about Kacchan. How everything about him on the outside looked so perfect. He had the best quirks, the best hero ranking, the best hair, the best body…

 

Stop it. Turn your emotions into rage.

 

But that was so much easier said than done with Kacchan’s bare skin and his fiery eyes and the sweet scent of his sweat filling his mind. God, how did Kacchan do it? How did he manage to dig his claws so deeply into Deku, even after all these years of mounting hatred and resentment? How could Deku still be so weak for a man that once told him to…

 

“ Take a swan dive off the roof of the building. ”

 

A flicker of rage sparked in Deku’s chest. There it is. He grabbed hold of that delicious fury as it burned away every other feeling, every other thought. Digging his fingers into Kacchan’s mattress, Deku incited a rampage of petty destruction. He turned the bed to ash, the bookshelves, the couch. He tore the paintings and awards from the walls, smiling wickedly as they crumbled in his hands.

 

Fuck you, Kacchan. Deku gritted his teeth as he snatched Kacchan’s framed hero license, staring daggers into that stupid black ink, swirling calligraphy, that fucking name. “ Dynamight… ” As if he needed another reason to hate the man, he’d taken part of his favorite hero’s name, the hero he absolutely idolized, the hero that had crushed his dreams and set him on this villainous path.

 

Not only the name, Kacchan had taken that hero’s quirk as well. As though he needed it. As though he wasn’t already fucking amazing with the quirk he was born with. If anything, Deku deserved to be the one taken under All Might’s wing all those years ago, to receive his quirk and his legacy. He used to be far more similar to All Might than Kacchan ever was. More than anything, he wanted to save people. Kacchan never cared about that. All he’d ever cared about was winning. All for One had even told Deku that All Might was born quirkless. He should have seen himself in Deku, but instead all he did was crush his dreams and abandon him.

 

Fuck both of them. Deku snarled as he turned Kacchan’s hero license to dust. There. Now, you aren’t even a hero. As if you ever fucking were.

 

Moving to Kacchan’s desk, Deku threw open the drawers and began tossing their contents onto the floor, not even bothering to decay them anymore.

 

“Fuck you!!!” Deku screamed, tearing papers and files from the drawers and letting them flutter to the floor at his feet. “FUCK YOU, YOU MOTHERFUCK—”

 

Deku’s hand hesitated as he gripped something at the bottom of the last drawer. Frayed cardboard, crumpled paper, blotted ink on the cover…all too familiar. His fingers trembled as he flipped back the cover of the notebook and read the only note scribbled inside.

 

A life without a quirk is not a life worth living. Here’s to hoping I’m luckier in the next one.

 

“He kept it…” Deku muttered to himself, eyes so wide with shock they started to water.

 

Why the fuck would Kacchan have kept this all these years? Unlike Deku, Kacchan had always hated him. Deku knew that, deep down, Kacchan was probably happy when he’d jumped, probably relieved that he wouldn’t have to deal with Deku following him around all googly-eyed anymore.

 

But if that was the case, then why would the bastard keep this last remnant of Deku’s life, as far as Kacchan knew? Was it possible that he was actually upset when Deku killed himself, that he actually cared and hadn’t wanted him to jump? No. He probably just felt guilty, like he would have if anyone else had committed suicide in front of him. It being Deku didn’t actually make a difference to Kacchan. He didn’t give a shit about Deku, or anyone else, even if his version of caring about himself was hating himself. That was obvious from the blatant alcoholism and sexcapades.

 

But wait… Why did he hate himself? He hadn’t hated himself when they were younger. If anything, he had been too in love with himself. Could all of that be because of Deku’s death as well?

 

Deku had never considered that before, never thought for a second that he was still on Kacchan’s mind at all, let alone affecting his everyday existence. Was it really because Kacchan cared about him all this time? Fuck, maybe even missed him? Would he really have been so affected if some random extra had jumped off a roof in front of him? Deku couldn’t be sure, but even the possibility had his heart racing.

 

A pair of crimson eyes flashed in Deku’s mind. They were warm and soft and brimming with tears. Deku couldn’t help but remember that moment, that stare that saw past his insidious facade and into that gentle soul of the quirkless boy who dared to dream. Deku had wished his whole life for Kacchan to look at him that way, or in any way that wasn’t cold or angry.

 

Was it real? Deku’s nerves buzzed, his body trembling. Was it just sex or did we really…make love?

 

 

Deku’s heart pounded with each step as he stomped down the basement stairs. He knew he was out of his mind for even considering coming down here, but at the moment, he couldn’t give less of a shit.

 

He was running out of time. If he wanted to resolve anything before Kacchan’s inevitable death, he needed to do it now.

 

Deku blinked as his eyes adjusted to the dim lighting. The room was quiet and cold, devoid of warmth from Kacchan’s heavy breaths. Sparse bookshelves, cement, dust…the space looked as it had before it had ever housed the number one hero. Before Deku had stripped him down and screamed his name…

 

“Where the fuck are you?” Deku growled, stomping around the room. He shoved the bookshelves over, letting them smash to the floor with a series of heavy thuds. Dust puffed up in the air, but Kacchan was still nowhere to be seen. Hadn’t the guards come down after Deku left to chain him up?

 

Deku froze, his breath catching in his throat. The guards. There weren’t any guards at the top of the stairs when he came down.

 

What the fuck is going on?

Notes:

Ohh Deku, I feel for you so deeply. He's been through so much, but I do love getting the chance to explore his side of things. His mindset is probably even more complicated and confusing than Kacchan's in a lot of ways. I tried to capture those complexities as best I could, and we'll get to see more of that as the fic progresses. Also SHINSOU!!! I love Shinsou so much, he's one of my favorite characters in MHA and I'm so glad I found a way to rope him into this fic. I really hope you guys enjoyed this chapter ^^ sorry it took a minute to write. chapter 7 took a lot out of me and i needed to recover, haha! Thank you so much for reading!! <333

Chapter 9: Lost Boys

Booming voices echoed through the hallway as Deku made his way toward All for One’s room.

 

“We had an agreement ! You never could have pulled this shit off without me!”

 

A scoff. “As if I actually needed your help.”

 

“You did ! And you swore —”

 

“I lied !”

 

Deku smirked as the sound of crackling flames exploded from the room he was heading toward. “Sounds like Dabi finally found out about our plan with his stupid brother,” Deku muttered under his breath.

 

Heat radiated from the door as Deku kicked it open, bursting into All for One’s bedroom in a huff. The couch in the corner of the room was alight with brilliant blue flames, and a scarred, terrifyingly gorgeous man with white hair and icy blue eyes was heaving beside it.

 

Dabi spat, “What do you want, you motherfucker?”

 

Deku chuckled. “Can you go throw your little tantrum somewhere else? The adults need the room.”

 

“I’m older than you, asshole. You’re just a spoiled little brat.”

 

“You sure about that?” Deku glanced at the burning couch.

 

“Whatever, fuck you guys,” Dabi sneered, shoving past Deku and stomping through the doorway.

 

“He’s going to set your room ablaze. You know that, right?” All for One said playfully.

 

Deku shrugged. “Yeah, whatever. It won’t be my room for much longer anyway. Three days, I hear.” He shot a pointed glare at his master.

 

“That’s right,” All for One said, sounding more amused than surprised.

 

Deku lowered his brow and hardened his stare. “Where is he?”

 

“Where is who?”

 

“Don’t fuck with me, Master. You know who.”

 

All for One crossed his arms disapprovingly. “Your little play thing, I presume? How can you be sure I know?”

 

“Judging by the fact that you aren’t running around wild with rage, I assume he didn’t escape.” Deku narrowed his stare. “So, yes. Where the fuck is he?”

 

“Of course he hasn’t escaped,” All for One said as though the idea of Kacchan escaping was the most ridiculous thing he’d ever heard in his life. As though Kacchan was so weak he’d never have the strength or nerve to pull off such a feat.

 

And for some reason, that really pissed Deku off.

 

“Tell me where he is right now!” Deku demanded, slamming his fist into the wall.

 

All for One scoffed, like he was simply dealing with yet another petulant child. “That is none of your concern. The last thing we need is you getting all mixed up in your head about some despicable hero.”

 

“He isn’t just some fucking hero. You know that.” Deku wished he could keep the hurt from seeping into his voice as his master’s words sliced open an old, festering wound.

 

“Exactly why you shouldn’t see him anymore until it is time to take my brother’s quirk and end his life. I’ve already taken care of the other part.”

 

Blue flames licked their bodies as the fire Dabi left began burning away at the carpet, the couch already just a pile of ash in the center of the floor now. All for One flicked his wrist, and a mountain of ice appeared, dousing the flames in an instant.

 

 

Katsuki’s head was pounding again. It was so excruciating that he didn’t even want to open his eyes. What’s a guy gotta do to get a fucking drink around here?

 

Someone grunted to his left. He wasn’t alone.

 

“Deku?” Katsuki asked, squinting. The room was even darker than it had been before.

 

Wait. This wasn’t the same room. The floor was still cement, but the walls were made of jagged rock. Rusty bars sprouted from the floor around Katsuki. A cell. He was in a prison cell.

 

Katsuki tried to move, but his arms were shackled again, this time chained to the floor at his sides. Where the fuck was he? How had he gotten here?

 

Another grunt drew his eye to the wall of bars to his left. A shadow shifted in the next cell, a man with pale skin and stringy blue hair.

 

“Hey!” Katsuki barked hoarsely.

 

The ghostly man turned, shooting Katsuki a blood red stare. “Hello, Dynamight ,” he hissed.

 

It wasn’t surprising that this strange man knew Katsuki’s hero name. He was the number one hero, after all, but the way he said it made it sound like he actually knew Katsuki. Like he was greeting an old friend, or moreover, an old nemesis.

 

Katsuki’s lip twitched irritably. “Do I know you?”

 

“Of course you don’t,” the man snapped. “You should , but of course you don’t. I don’t even know me any more.”

 

“What the fuck does that even mean? And where are we? What is this place?” Katsuki’s gaze wandered, scanning the rest of the dungeon until he spotted another flash of white and red shining in the darkness.

 

“Holy shit…Shouto?”

 

His face was slack, his head leaned back against the craggy wall of the cell across from Katsuki’s. Squinting, Katsuki could just barely make out the shallow rise and fall of Shouto’s chest. He’s breathing. Thank god.

 

“Shouto! Shouto! Wake the fuck up, you lazy asshole!” Katsuki kicked his cell bars, the clang reverberating off the walls. Shouto didn’t react whatsoever.

 

“Will you shut the hell up?” the ghostly man whined. “That guy has been out for days. Garaki shoots him up with the good stuff at least once a day. Must be fucking nice…”

 

Katsuki snarled, “What the fuck is the good stuff ?”

 

The man rolled his eyes as though Katsuki had just asked him what two plus two equals. “Drugs, obviously.”

 

“I know that, dipshit. What kind of drugs?”

 

“Why?” the man asked, a sickly smile spreading across his chapped lips. “You want some, Number One?”

 

If Katsuki was being honest, he would have killed for even an aspirin at that point. The throbbing in his head was growing unbearable, but he’d never let this creepy stranger know about his weakness.

 

Instead of lying, Katsuki decided to change the subject. “Who the fuck are you?”

 

“You ask too many questions.”

 

“What, you have something better to do?”

 

The man leaned his head back against the wall, closing his bloodshot eyes. “No, I suppose not. My name is Shimura Tenko.”

 

Katsuki arched his brow. Shimura. Why did that name sound so familiar? Wait… Wasn’t that the name of All Might’s master?

 

“You related to Shimura Nana?” Katsuki asked lowly, aware that there could be villains eavesdropping in the darkened corners of the room.

 

Tenko shrugged. “Why don’t you ask her yourself? I know she’s in there, living in your head or whatever. I know a lot of stuff, not that it matters when I’m stuck in this hellhole.”

 

Katsuki’s ears perked up at Tenko’s statement. He knows stuff. What else does he know? Maybe a way to get out of here? Or a way to get a message to Deku at least?

 

“Where are we?” Katsuki demanded, wincing at the harshness of his own voice. He had never been good at subtlety, more the blow-stuff-up-and-get-results type.

 

Tenko didn’t seem bothered by his tone, though. In fact, he seemed to soften a bit from it, as though it was familiar. Comforting, even. “We’re in the hole where All for One likes to discard stuff and leave it to rot.”

 

Katsuki’s jaw nearly hit the floor. All for One? As in, All Might’s archnemesis? Why was he involved in all of this? Wait…

 

Archnemesis… Deku had called him that when he showed up that first night. Was that because Katsuki’s master and his master were also… This was bad. If All for One had taken Deku under his wing, there’s no telling what evil they’d planned, what evil Deku might now be a part of.

 

Oh, god… Did Deku already have All for One’s quirk, like Katsuki had All Might’s?

 

No. There was no way. If Deku had All for One, he would have had access to countless quirks. He would have used more than just that disintegrating one when they’d fought, probably also when they’d fucked…

 

But if he didn’t already have it, that meant he was likely going to get it.

 

“When’s the walking nutsack going to give Deku his dumbfuck quirk?” Katsuki spat, shooting Tenko a glare.

 

Tenko let out a raspy chuckle. “I’m surprised you know about that.”

 

“When?” Katsuki growled.

 

Tenko shrugged. “Last I heard the old man wanted to begin the transformation in a couple of days. They don’t tell me much down here, though. Could be happening right now for all I know.”

 

Fuck! Katsuki needed to get out of there. He needed to wake Shouto and find Deku, hopefully one of them would know where All Might was, too. Then, they could all escape and work this shit out together.

 

Katsuki would save Deku from this treacherous life if it was the last thing he ever fucking did. He leaned forward, whispering through the bars. “How do we get out of here?”

 

“Out of here?” Tenko scoffed. “You don’t. You think if I knew the way out I’d still be wasting away in this fucking cell?”

 

Katsuki rolled his eyes, irritated with his own stupidity. Obviously if Tenko knew a way out he would have already used it. Why did thinking about Deku make him lose all sense? What the fuck was going on with him?

 

“Is there any way I could at least get a message out to Deku?” Katsuki whispered.

 

Suddenly, Tenko’s expression shifted. It was like switch flipped in Tenko’s eyes, the blood red of his irises shimmering with murderous intent. “Again, with this fucking asshole?! Why won’t you just shut up about him?! I hate that motherfucker!”

 

“Why? What’d he do to you?” Katsuki spoke the words before he really had time to think about them. Why did he even care? There were far more important things for him to be worrying about right now, but it was too late.

 

Tenko began to pant like an angry dog. “What did he do to me? WHAT DID HE DO TO ME?! HE STOLE MY FUCKING LIFE, THAT’S WHAT HE FUCKING DID TO ME! I was supposed to be All for One’s successor! I was supposed to be the next demon lord! I was supposed to get that decay quirk, and instead, he gave it to an asshole who doesn’t even fucking appreciate it! I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE RULER OF OUR NEW WORLD, NOT THAT WEAK ASS WANNABE!”

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow. None of this was making sense. All for One choosing Tenko, sure. He was Shimura Nana’s relative, probably a grandson or something. It would make sense for him to choose him as a successor, anything to fuck around with All Might and gain an advantage against One for All, but then…why did he change his mind? Why did he choose Deku and shove Tenko down here? What about Deku made him a more attractive candidate than a literal descendant of a former wielder??

 

“Why did he change his mind?” Katsuki pondered aloud, unfazed by Tenko’s outburst.

 

“ Because I’m not a fucking idiot like that green haired brat! I found out about his actual plan, and I fought back , fought for my fucking life , and look where that got me. I should’ve just gone along with it…” Tenko’s voice broke off, and a few sobs racked his chest.

 

“His actual plan?” Katsuki pressed, his heart sprinting. “What do you mean, his actual plan?”

 

The sobs tapered off, replaced by soft chuckles that grew into gut-trembling laughter. It was maniacal. Downright villainous. And it sent a shiver down Katsuki’s spine, but his expression remained intense as ever. Thank god he was so good at masking his weaknesses.

 

He didn’t become the number one hero by letting villains see the fear coursing through his veins.

 

“Your dumbass little friend thinks he’s All for One’s successor. That he’s going to receive a couple of flashy quirks of his choosing, and then All for One will hand over his power, so he can begin a stockpile of his own, since his body can’t handle all the quirks All for One has gathered over the years. To be honest, that much is true. I’ve heard that’s why you and that two-toned freak over there are here. Deku wanted your explosions and his ice and fire.”

 

Katsuki gritted his teeth. Is that really why Deku had kidnapped him in the first place? Just to steal his quirk? It couldn’t have been. He said he was going to kill Katsuki, but All for One’s quirk didn’t require the victim to die. Maybe he was going to kill me to take One for All after his transformation?

 

Fuck, he needed to see Deku. To talk to him. To kiss him…

 

Dammit, Katsuki, get your shit together! This asshole is still talking. You need to hear this information…

 

Letting out a dry cackle, Tenko continued, “What Dumbfuck doesn’t know is that the last part of the transformation is a complete lie. All for One told us that we would have to die, and then he’d resurrect us, giving us his quirk in the process. THAT’S TOTAL BULLSHIT! You don’t have to die to receive his quirk. The motherfucker just wants an empty vessel so he can fully possess their body!”

 

All the fortitude in the world couldn’t keep Katsuki from gasping in that moment. He felt his heart plummet, leaving his chest empty and aching.

 

Deku was going to die, and he wasn’t coming back this time.

Notes:

Oooh Shigaraki spilling the tea this chapter! He and Dabi are other characters I love so much and am so glad I could bring them into the mix for this fic. They won't be in it as much as Shinsou, but I'm still glad I could bring them in and tie in the relations to canon. SO SAD THO about Deku, right?? What's Katsuki going to do? Can he save him? And how's he going to get out of this damn dungeon?? So many questions, many to be answered very soon. ^^ thank you so much for reading <33 I really hope you're enjoying it!!

Chapter 10: Renegade

Deku’s heart pounded like the heavy beat of a death march. It took every ounce of effort he had to keep the panic from showing on his face as he passed beneath the dim flickers of torches barely lighting the rocky passageway.

 

This was just a hunch. All for One could have moved Kacchan anywhere in Japan, but if he really wanted to make him disappear , Deku thought it was a pretty good bet he’d be here. His jaw was taut and gaze narrowed as he strutted up to the pair of guards stationed on either size of an enormous steel door.

 

“Open it,” Deku demanded through gritted teeth. The guards didn’t move, didn’t even blink in response to his command. “Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t think you heard me.”

 

In a flash, Deku lunged at one of the guards, grabbing them by the throat and slamming them back into the craggy wall. “I said fucking open it.” The guard barely had a chance to yelp before decay splintered from Deku’s hand, turning their throat and open mouth to crumbling dust.

 

Deku turned on his heel to face the other guard. “Well, I guess they can’t now, can they? Are you going to obey me or suffer the same fucking consequences?”

 

The second guard’s eyes were wide with horror as he scurried to unlock the door and swing it open. Deku smirked, whispering as he strode through the doorway, “Thanks. Why don’t you go take a break? I’d like a little privacy , if you know what I mean.”

 

The guard nodded, bustling off into the shadows. Deku let out a silent sigh of relief as he shut the door behind him as gently as he could. It still made a pretty loud banging sound as the hinges slid into place.

 

A raspy call from the other side of the room sent a bolt of lightning through Deku’s veins. “Deku? Is that you?”

 

“Yeah, it’s me.” Deku peered into the darkness, walking down the aisle that separated the two rows of prison cells.

 

Passing Tenko, Deku was thankful to see him curled up with his eyes closed, taking deep, even breaths. Deku was really hoping he would be asleep so he wouldn’t have to deal with his bitching and whining about petty bullshit.

 

Deku cringed as he came upon Kacchan’s cell. His eyelids lulled lazily, his mouth half-open. Garaki must’ve gotten to him already. It was actually impressive that Kacchan was even conscious if that was the case. Dabi’s brother had been knocked out cold since his first dose.

 

Of course Kacchan was stronger than the sedatives. He really could beat anything.

 

“You here…to kill me…?” Kacchan whispered, lifting his chin. His eyes were glazed over, pupils so dilated Deku could barely make out the thin crimson line surrounding them.

 

Yes. That’s what Deku should have said, should have been thinking, but the ache in his chest was too strong to listen to reason. He felt like a little kid playing heroes with Kacchan, back when they were friends and they would rescue each other from imagined dangers.

 

But these dangers were real, and far too imminent to be ignored.

 

Deku didn’t want to kill Kacchan anymore, despite the thousands of times he’d fantasized about it. He wanted to punish him, sure. He wanted revenge. But above all that, he wanted to hold him, wanted to feel the warmth of his chest, his lips, his tears on his cheek. Wanted to see that look in those crimson eyes that he couldn’t explain with words but he could feel with every fiber of his being.

 

“No,” Deku grunted, decaying the bars of the cell so he could step inside. He knelt in front of Kacchan, grabbing his restraints. “I’m here to fucking save you, dumbass.”

 

The cuffs around Kacchan’s arms disintegrated. He slumped to the side, and Deku caught him before his head could crash into the cement floor.

 

“Why?” Kacchan whispered, eyes half-closed as he stared up at Deku in confusion.

 

Deku rolled his eyes. They didn’t have time for this right now. That stupid guard was bound to come back any minute, likely with the rest of the league on his heels if they’d caught wind of what Deku had done.

 

“We can talk shit out later,” Deku muttered, gently pulling Kacchan into an upright position. “Can you walk?”

 

Kacchan shrugged. “Obviously… Wha? Y’think I’m some kinda w’kling?”

 

Deku smirked. Kacchan’s blind confidence should have irritated him, but he’d always found it sort of endearing. Kacchan wobbled as Deku helped him up onto his feet, leaning into him until he’d found his balance.

 

“You good?” Deku asked.

 

Kacchan nodded. “‘Course I am.” He stumbled woozily as he took a step forward. Deku caught him, placing his hand on his shoulder.

 

“I don’t need your help,” Kacchan grumbled.

 

Deku chuckled. “Shut up and hold on, you drugged-up asshole.”

 

Kacchan huffed but didn’t protest any further as they made their way out of the cell. “Wait,” he insisted, squeezing Deku’s shoulder so hard it made him cringe. Damn, did Kacchan just get stronger?

 

“What’s the hold up?” Deku demanded.

 

“We gotta bring Shouto.”

 

“Who the fuck is Shouto?”

 

Kacchan pointed to the cell across from his, where Shouto still sat unconscious, slumped against the back wall.

 

Deku furrowed his brow. “Oh. Dabi’s brother.”

 

“The fuck is a Dabi?” Kacchan slurred.

 

Rolling his eyes, Deku tried to keep walking, but Kacchan held him in place. “We have to bring Shouto."

 

“We don’t have time for this!”

 

“I’m not leaving without him! All Might, too. Where is he?”

 

Deku’s breath caught in his throat. He cringed as he felt heat rush to his cheeks. Why did he even care? It’s not like Kacchan would read into the fact that Deku had left All Might passed out on his bed instead of kidnapping them both. Right?

 

No. Of course he would figure it out, and it was fucking embarrassing. Kacchan knew Deku far too well not to figure out that, despite demolishing his childhood dreams, Deku still fostered a soft spot for the former number one hero. Their hero.

 

Whatever. They didn’t have time for this childish bullshit. Deku would just have to hope that Kacchan would recognize the urgency of their situation and let it go, at least for now.

 

“All Might’s not here,” Deku muttered.

 

“Okay… Where is he?”

 

“I don’t know, probably at home?” Deku snapped. “I didn’t take him when I took you.”

 

“Oh…” Kacchan said, realization crossing his face. He donned a smirk that made Deku want to punch him. “Okay… Well then, let’s get Shouto and get the fuck outta here.”

 

“Fine,” Deku growled, stomping over to Shouto’s cell and decaying a few of the bars. “I guess I’ll just fucking carry him.”

 

“Nah, I got ‘im.” Kacchan brushed past Deku, surprisingly stable on his feet now, scooped up Shouto and threw him over his shoulder.

 

It was kinda… hot seeing Kacchan’s effortless strength. One for All was likely returning, since Deku had removed his quirk-cancelling restraints, but still…

 

“The fuck you looking at?” Deku started, realizing he’d been staring at Kacchan for probably far too long.

 

Deku shook his head, hating the squeak of his voice as he responded. “Nothing. Let’s just get out of here.”

It was surprisingly easy for Deku and Kacchan, with Shouto in tow, to escape All for One’s underground fortress.

 

That should have been a red flag.

 

Everything was coming up roses as they crawled up through a sewage grate in the middle of an empty street in the slums, the ground wet with rain and the night dark and starless. Even the city lights seemed dimmed, as if to further aid in their escape.

 

All of this should have raised the hairs on the back of Deku’s neck, should have turned his veins to ice and deafened his mind with sirens of panic, but all he could feel was overwhelming relief.

 

Kacchan was alive. He was breathing…and walking…and free.

 

Just a week before, this would have been a nightmare, but now…now it was a dream come true. 

 

Maybe, just maybe, they could work their shit out. Maybe they could find their way back to each other, or just find each other for the first time, really. What they had when they were younger was toxic. Tainted. But what they had now, the potential that blossomed in those fleeting moments of bliss when their bodies and souls were one…maybe that could be enough for Deku, and hopefully for Kacchan, too.

 

But none of that was going to be possible if they got caught. If All for One and the League of Villains caught them and dragged them back to hell. They needed to keep moving.

 

“We need to drop him off at a hospital,” Kacchan grunted, nodding toward the unconscious man on his shoulder.

 

“You should probably go with him,” Deku said without really thinking. A bolt of panic shot through him. He didn’t want to be separated from Kacchan. Not yet, before they’ve had a chance to talk, to even take a fucking breath.

 

But he believed what he said, too. Kacchan had been shot up with the same drugs as Dabi’s brother. Deku didn’t even really know what kind of drugs they were, Garaki and All for One never elaborated on that sort of frivolous information. For all Deku knew, the drugs could be toxic. Deadly even.

 

Kacchan scoffed. “I’m fine.”

 

Despite Kacchan’s unwavering confidence, Deku wasn’t really sure if he believed him, but fuck , the selfish part of him wanted to. He needed time with Kacchan, and the thought of having to wait for god knows how long sounded like fucking torture.

 

God, how his body ached for Kacchan’s touch, his kiss, his cock so fucking deep inside him. He hungered for that gruff, tender tone Kacchan only used when they were alone and that look in those crimson eyes that made Deku feel like he’d never been seen before. Like he was the only person in the world, and when they were together, nothing else existed. Like he was made for Kacchan, and like Kacchan knew he was made for Deku, too.

 

But more than anything, Deku wanted to know— No. He needed to know if all of this was real. If Kacchan really had these same thoughts and feelings running on loop in his mind. If they had merely fucked, or if they had made love.

 

“This way,” Kacchan commanded, taking off down the sidewalk.

 

Deku fell into step behind him, keeping close so he didn’t lose him in the encroaching shadows. “Where are we going?”

 

“Does being a villain make everyone an idiot? I just told you. We’re dropping Shouto off at a hospital.”

 

“And after that? We can’t just go back to your apartment. That’s the first place Master and the League will look.” A pang of guilt fluttered in Deku’s gut as he remembered the disarray he had left at Kacchan’s apartment. Maybe he could find a way to fix it up before Kacchan eventually did go back home.

 

Kacchan tossed a glare over his shoulder at Deku. “I know that, dumbass. I have an idea of a place we could lay low for a while.”

Deku paced from the shadows around the corner outside the hospital emergency room. It had taken him and Kacchan less than an hour to walk there, but Kacchan had been inside for nearly as long now, and Deku couldn’t help but fidget nervously.

 

What if Kacchan had changed his mind? What if he’d called the police, and they were on their way to arrest Deku? What if Kacchan had passed out from the drugs in his system and had been admitted himself?

 

Down, down, down the spiral Deku went. His body was chilled to the bone. A cold sweat broke on his forehead, and his chest felt heavy, as though his heart was encased in a thick layer of ice.

 

“You ready to go?”

 

Deku whirled to meet Kacchan’s gaze. It was so warm, the comfort of a fireplace on a snowy winter evening, and damn if it didn’t melt away Deku’s worries and thaw his frozen heart.

 

Deku nodded, and he followed Kacchan as they began their trek across the parking lot and out onto the busy sidewalk.

 

Deku asked, “Where are we going?”

 

“A safehouse,” Kacchan replied, as though the answer should have been obvious. “Well, it used to be. It’s pretty much abandoned now.”

 

They walked on quietly for a while. Deku had about a million things he wanted to say to Kacchan, but he figured it could wait until they were alone and comfortable. Out there on the street, there were countless cars and pedestrians and pesky business security cameras. It was far too risky to discuss anything serious with so many eyes and ears on them.

 

Plus, Deku had a feeling, or hope rather, that their talk would lead to some actions that weren’t fit for public display.

 

So, though his mind screamed a thousand panicked thoughts, Deku stayed silent.

 

That is, until Kacchan barreled over in the middle of the crowded sidewalk and began violently coughing up mouthfuls of blood.

Notes:

this chapter makes me sooo happy <33 I love getting to have a chance to show the growth in Deku and the love blossoming there for Kacchan (even though we all know that has ALWAYS been there, no matter what Deku thinks ^^). The end is a bit worrisome though! Will Kacchan be okay?? And why does he keep coughing up blood, what's that about? And what will they do now that Deku is an escaped villain??? So many questions that will all (eventually) be answered, haha. Anyway, thank you so much for reading! <333

Chapter 11: The Way You Were

Shit, that’s a lot of blood.

 

Katsuki’s chest grew tight with the realization. He’d been so busy dealing with imprisonment and his tangled knot of emotions for Deku that he’d forgotten about this nuisance of a condition.

 

Come to think of it, he hadn’t had a fit like this since before he’d been kidnapped. Was that a coincidence?

 

Katsuki needed to talk to All Might. In fact, wasn’t that why All Might was going to stop by his apartment in the first place? Something about speaking with the vestiges?

 

It didn’t surprise Katsuki that his mysterious affliction could be connected to One for All, but he still needed more clarity. There had to be a solution. For all he knew, All Might and the other vestiges had already found one.

 

It’d be nice if I could just contact them myself at-will. But that had never worked for Katsuki in the past. The few times he had made contact with them, they appeared to him in dreams, and it seemed they were in complete control over when they showed up, even when Katsuki screamed and pleaded for them to show themselves. Fucking pricks.

 

Katsuki shivered. His face was wet. Was he crying? No. Why the fuck would he be crying?

 

The world was sideways. Why was the world sideways? And so damn loud ?

 

Screaming. Someone was screaming, but it was muffled by the liquid flooding his ears. Katsuki tried to lift his head, but his vision was so blurry that the movement made him nauseous. His mouth was wet. Had he already been vomiting?

 

Red stained his hands, his clothes. The blood. That’s right. He had been coughing up blood. That’s probably why he felt so disoriented right now. It would pass. It had to pass…

 

“KACCHAN!”

 

Katsuki bolted upright, nearly smacking into Deku who was hovering over him with a panicked gleam in his eyes.

 

“What?” Katsuki asked defensively. “Why the fuck are you looking at me like that?”

 

“Kacchan, thank god!” Deku squeezed Katsuki’s shoulders as though he was checking to make sure they were real. Tears trickled from his gorgeous stare as he cupped Katsuki’s face in his hands, wiping blood from his chin with his thumb. “I thought you were dying. I thought you were fucking dying!”

 

“I’m fine,” Katsuki muttered, his voice too shaky to be believable.

 

Deku lowered his brow disapprovingly. “Don’t even fucking try me. For all we know, those drugs could still kill you!”

 

Katsuki lowered his voice, shooting Deku a warning glare. “It’s not the drugs! This just kind of…happens sometimes…”

 

“We need to get you back to the hospital—”

 

“No!” Katsuki glanced around where a small crowd had gathered to gawk. Fuck, they’ve probably even recognized me. “We need to get to the safe house. Now. It’s right around the corner.”

Deku followed Kacchan’s gaze, realizing the shit storm they’d just stumbled into. He nodded, helping Kacchan to his feet. The crowd was gathering rapidly, too thick for the pair to slip through. Some people recorded them with their phones while others shouted different variations of, “Is that Dynamight?”

 

“We need a distraction,” Kacchan whispered.

 

Deku breathed deeply. “I’m on it.”

 

Kacchan grabbed his arm. “Don’t murder anyone.”

 

“Fine,” Deku groaned, rolling his eyes. He hadn’t planned on murdering anyone. He really hadn’t. Even though it would have been a lot easier to just kill someone. Even better if it was a lot of someones. Less witnesses too…

 

Kacchan narrowed his stare. “I mean it. I see that look in your eyes.”

 

So what, you can read my mind now, Kacchan? Huffing irritably, Deku yanked his arm free and stomped toward the nearest building. It was tall, with broken, boarded up windows and chains across the front door.

 

“Wait, what’re you doing?” The crowd followed Kacchan as he rushed to catch up with Deku.

 

“Now who’s the stupid one?” Deku retorted. “I’m creating a diversion, just like you said.”

 

“You can’t bring down that building!”

 

“It’s clearly abandoned!”

 

Kacchan looked up, surveying the crumbling structure. “There could still be people inside!”

 

“There’s chains on the door!”

 

“There’s plenty of broken windows on the first floor people could have climbed in through.”

 

It took everything Deku had not to roll his eyes again. “Look, do you want to get out of here, or not?”

 

The crowd was closing in. Before long, escape wouldn’t be an option at all.

 

“I have another plan,” Kacchan said, grabbing Deku’s hand.

 

Deku flinched. Most people were terrified of his hands, but Kacchan grabbed it without a second thought. Warmth bubbled in Deku’s chest. He wanted to pull Kacchan closer and kiss him right there in the middle of the crowded sidewalk.

 

Kacchan was still on high alert. He hadn’t seemed to notice Deku’s sudden irrational urge. Good. At least he can’t read all my thoughts.

 

Kacchan sighed. “I didn’t want to do this, since it’ll be a dead giveaway that I was trying to escape and raise a lot of questions, but I don’t think we have any other options right now. I’ll just have to deal with the public later.”

 

Deku furrowed his brow. “What’re you going to do?”

 

Kacchan pulled Deku close and wrapped his arm around his waist. His body was so warm. Too warm. Deku’s eyes widened as orange lightning sparked across Kacchan’s skin.

 

“Do you trust me?” Kacchan whispered gruffly.

 

Deku’s breath caught in his throat. Did he trust Kacchan now? He shouldn’t. He knew he shouldn’t, but he couldn’t ignore the squeeze in his chest. His heart ached with the truth, that despite everything Kacchan had put him through when they were younger, the years of torment and ridicule, despite all of that, he did still trust Kacchan.

 

In fact, he always had. That’s probably the truth that hurt the most.

 

Deku nodded. A smile crossed Kacchan’s perfect lips, and fuck if Deku didn’t consider kissing him again in front of all the bystanders with their widened eyes and damned cameras.

 

“Smoke screen,” Kacchan said, and in an instant, the world around them melted away into a thick cloud of purple smoke.

 

Chaos broke out around them, but Deku could only hear it. Shouts. Screams. Even wails. A few people ran past, but they were too disoriented to notice the number one hero and the villain in his arms.

 

Deku coughed. “What…the fuck…is—”

 

“Float,” Kacchan said.

 

Deku’s haggard breaths were knocked from his lungs as his body was yanked upward, still glued in Kacchan’s embrace. They floated upward, soon rising above the purple smoke and heading off down the street.

 

“You have…other quirks…?” Deku heaved.

 

Kacchan smirked. “No. They’re part of One for All. I’m surprised All for One didn’t tell you about them.” He extended his free arm and frowned, inspecting his palm.

 

Deku’s heart fluttered nervously. He didn’t need Kacchan to tell him what was wrong. Maybe he was beginning to be able to read his mind, too.

 

“That’s weird,” Kacchan muttered.

 

“Your explosions aren’t working?” Deku asked guiltily. He hadn’t been certain All for One had taken Kacchan’s quirk before throwing him in the dungeon, but he knew it was definitely a possibility.

 

“No. How did you…?” Kacchan’s expression dropped as his voice trailed off. “The motherfucker already took them, didn’t he?”

 

“Most likely.” Deku looked down, watching as the concrete far below them turned to sand. They had made it to the beach at the edge of the city. They descended, landing near an old beach house with darkened windows and chipped, faded paint.

 

The sand was soft beneath Deku’s shoes, still warm from baking in the sun all day. It didn’t seem like the rain had reached this far, and Deku was glad for it. Kacchan had always hated the rain.

 

Kacchan moved to walk toward the beach house, but Deku held him in place. He gazed up into those gorgeous crimson eyes, surprised that Kacchan wasn’t scowling. He didn’t seem nearly as bothered by losing his birth quirk as Deku had expected him to be.

 

Still, Deku felt bad. Kacchan would have never lost his explosions if Deku hadn’t kidnapped him for that very reason. At the time, it had made sense. Deku had to pick a few flashy quirks to steal to begin his All for One stockpile. What better than to take his archnemesis’ amazing quirk, the one he’d shoved in Deku’s face since the day it manifested?

 

What Deku hadn’t understood back then was that he had a lot more feelings for Kacchan than just hatred and resentment. Those feelings of adoration and admiration that he thought he’d abandoned had never really gone away. If anything, they were stronger now than ever, if that was even possible.

 

Their relationship was so damn complicated it made Deku’s head spin, but nevertheless, he regretted ever asking All for One to steal Kacchan’s quirk. He needed Kacchan to know that.

 

“I’m sorry,” Deku whispered, burying his face in Kacchan’s neck. “I’m so sorry, Kacchan. It’s my fault he took your quirk.”

 

“I know,” Kacchan said. His voice was so warm and gentle, Deku wouldn’t have believed it had come from him if he didn’t feel the vibrations in his throat as he spoke.

 

“Please don’t hate me,” Deku said, wincing at his pathetic pleading tone. “I’ll make him give them back. I swear.”

 

To Deku’s surprise, Kacchan chuckled. “And how are you planning to do that?”

 

“I have my ways.” Deku smiled, planting a kiss on Kacchan’s neck.

 

Kacchan shivered beneath his lips. “Let’s get inside. We have a lot to discuss.”

 

Deku nodded, letting Kacchan lead him toward the front door of the beach house.

The inside of the beach house was exactly as Katsuki remembered it. A small, open living room and kitchen, a bathroom, and an enormous bedroom that took up more than half of the house. He led Deku down the small hallway, past a closet door which he knew held a hidden ladder into the attic where he and his task force had hidden to carry out their operation.

 

He had told Deku that it was a safehouse, but that wasn’t exactly the case. It was actually the base of a sting operation he and several other heroes had teamed up for to bust a major human trafficking ring in the city, but that was too much to explain when his mind was so fogged with whatever drug cocktail the villains had given him, so he had figured “safehouse” would suffice.

 

And it had…up until now.

 

Deku’s eyes widened as they entered the bedroom. It was mostly bare, other than a couple shabby dressers and a massive bed in the center of the room, but those weren’t what drew Deku’s eye. No, unsurprisingly, his gaze was drawn upward to the mirror that covered the entire ceiling.

 

“What the fuck kind of safehouse has a mirrored ceiling?” Deku asked.

 

He turned to meet Katsuki’s gaze, his mouth curled up in a smile. It wasn’t that dastardly smirk he usually wore these days. No, it was that smile that Katsuki knew, that he remembered from long, long ago. A smile from when they were kids, climbing atop pillow forts wearing bathroom towel capes and saving each other from invisible villains. A smile from before Katsuki had bullied Deku, before he had beaten him and bruised him and broken him.

 

Before he had killed him.

 

Katsuki looked away as his chest squeezed, hot tears welling up in his eyes.

 

“What’s wrong?” Deku asked. His voice was so gentle and caring.

 

Katsuki’s vision blurred as he remembered the day he decided he hated Deku all those years ago. Remembering it now, it all seemed so fucking stupid. His head had ached from where he had fallen in the river. Hell, he probably had a concussion. Tiny Deku was there in a flash, reaching out his hand, those gorgeous emeralds full of the same concern they held now.

 

He had just wanted to help Katsuki, to make sure he was okay. Deku’s greatest sin— No, his only sin, at least back then, was caring for Katsuki. And that realization broke Katsuki’s fucking heart.

 

Katsuki coughed, choking on a sob as hot tears streamed down his cheeks.

 

“Oh shit. Are you coughing up more blood? Here, let me find you a towel.” Deku retreated toward the doorway.

 

“No. I’m fine.” Katsuki’s broken tone stopped Deku. He turned, staring at Katsuki as though he had just spoken a different language.

 

Katsuki hated that he was crying, hated that he sounded and surely looked so damn weak right now. He wasn’t ready to have this conversation with Deku. Not yet. After all, they had time now, right? They couldn’t very well go anywhere for at least a little while. This conversation could at least wait until Katsuki could calm down and get his thoughts in order.

 

“The mirror,” Katsuki said, focusing on keeping his voice even. “This wasn’t exactly a safehouse. We used it for a sting operation to take down a human trafficking ring. It’s a two-way mirror. The other heroes and I were stationed up in the attic so we could see down and catch the villains in the act.”

 

Deku must have taken the hint that Katsuki didn’t want to discuss his uncharacteristic emotional outburst because he didn’t question it further. Instead, he walked past Katsuki and flopped onto the bed.

 

“Oh,” Deku said. “So somebody could be up there watching us right now?”

 

Katsuki smirked, making his way over to the foot of the bed and taking a seat. “I mean, yeah, I guess in theory, but this place has been empty for a while. That operation was over a year ago, and this place is owned by the government now, so it’ll probably just sit and rot. In fact, I hope it does, because I’d hate to have to use it again. That was one of the most difficult cases I’ve ever had to stomach.”

 

Deku kicked off his shoes, lying back on the mountain of pillows at the head of the bed. “You want to come lay with me?”

 

Katsuki’s heart skipped a beat. He did want to lay next to Deku. He wanted to hold him and run his fingers through his shaggy green hair and gaze into those mesmerizing emeralds for all eternity, but he feared if he did crawl up there next to Deku that he would do just that, and even some other far more distracting things. He knew if he did that, he wouldn’t be able to resist Deku’s touch, his lips, tearing off his clothes and kissing every part of him…

 

But that was the problem. Once Katsuki started, he knew he wouldn’t be able to stop. He couldn’t afford to lose his head and start thinking with his dick right now.

 

There was so much he needed to discuss with Deku. Had he really changed? It certainly seemed so, with the escape and the smile and the familiar warmth in his eyes, but Katsuki needed to be sure. Also, where did they stand? Where would they go from here, the number one hero and a newly reformed villain? Luckily Deku had never debuted his villainy publicly so there wouldn’t be as much explaining to do, but still. Deku had killed people. He had studied under All for One and even received a quirk from him.

 

All for One… Was Deku still planning to receive his quirk? God, Katsuki hoped not. He’d really rather avoid discussing what Tenko had told him in the dungeon if he could, at least for now. It was bound to lead to a fight, since Deku likely still fostered some sort of fondness, if not downright loyalty, toward his master. Katsuki knew he’d likely have to tell Deku of All for One’s fucked up body possession plan at some point no matter what, but he could use some more time to prepare for that uncomfortable conversation if at all possible.

 

So yeah, there was a ton of shit they needed to work out before they started fucking, especially now in this place where they could literally fuck for days on end without any interruptions from the outside world.

 

It was far too dangerous for Katsuki to lay with Deku, at least for the time being.

Notes:

What do we think?? Is Katsuki going to stay strong and talk with Deku before they get to the fun stuff?? Ah, I love them both so much, even though they frustrate me to no end. I love to see them coming together, even though its agony because it takes so long and there is still sooo much that will happen between them before the end of the fic. At least they're both warming up some to the idea of truly coming together though, right? And now they're together alone in a little beach house, so cute! I'm really excited for the next chapter. This little arc is truly the closest to fluff I think I'm capable of writing and I am sooo here for it! But after that I gotta warn, the angst is gonna be back in FULL FORCE so buckle up. Okay, that's all I have for this one. I really hope you guys are enjoying it. Thank you so much for reading!!! <333

Chapter 12: Baby

Notes:

before you begin this chapter, I would like to give some special thanks to the best friends, writers, fic war arch nemeses I could have ever asked for -- yvkoii (Braincell Two) and Little_Doe420 (Braincell One) for collaborating with me on this chapter! They are incredible writers and people, and you should definitely check out their work on here as well! Love you guys, thank you so much for your help, support, and all the love <333

Deku’s shaggy green hair fell back from his face as his head crashed into the mountain of pillows on the bed. Kacchan was on top of him, hips pressing into him, head bent low and lips slammed against his.

 

Thank fuck Kacchan had taken the hint. Deku didn’t think he could have waited another second for this. He knew they needed to talk, sure, but right now, he needed this so much more.

 

Deku grabbed the back of Kacchan’s shirt, digging his fingernails into the soft fabric, too much fabric, keeping him from that warm, smooth skin. He thought about decaying it like he had before, but then Kacchan wouldn’t have anything to wear afterward. While Deku didn’t hate the idea of having a half-naked Kacchan walking around the safehouse for however long they’d be there, he knew that just wasn’t practical.

 

So instead of turning Kacchan’s nuisance of a shirt to dust, Deku ripped it off and tossed it on the floor beside the bed.

 

“Thank you for not destroying my only shirt,” Kacchan grunted against Deku’s lips.

 

Deku smirked. “I thought about it.”

 

“I know you did.”

 

A low moan escaped Deku’s throat as Kacchan’s lips migrated to his neck and parted, sucking and biting down on his tender skin. God , why did that feel so good? Deku didn’t usually like being bit, didn’t usually like being touched much at all since he was self conscious about his leathery skin. Most of the time, he just did what he had to do to get to fucking, but with Kacchan, he didn’t want to rush. He wanted to be touched and kissed and raked over with that fiery gaze. He wanted it to last as long as it possibly could.

 

Which at this rate still wouldn’t be very long, but a guy can dream.

 

Deku’s heart skipped a beat as Kacchan’s kisses trailed downward to the base of his neck. He chuckled as Kacchan laced his fingers in the fold of his button-down shirt and ripped it open, popping off every last one of the buttons.

 

“Now what am I supposed to wear?” Deku asked playfully.

 

Kacchan smirked. “I can fix it.”

 

“You know how to sew?”

 

“Mhm. You surprised?” Kacchan met Deku’s gaze, kissing his bare chest, and Deku just fucking melted. He couldn’t breathe beneath that smolder, let alone answer Kacchan’s question. It felt like his body was on fire, every nerve crackling and screaming for more.

 

And…there was something else there, too. Thirst, desire, and…something tender. Like the answer to a question Deku had been trying to figure out for his entire life. It was deep and warm and relieving, something he could feel radiating from deep in his bones, and nothing, nothing had ever made him feel more alive.

 

“What?” Kacchan asked softly, resting his chin on Deku’s sternum.

 

Deku’s heart raced, pumping so much blood into his cheeks that they burned. He shook his head, donning a nervous smile. He felt like he was a kid again, blushing beneath Kacchan’s intense gaze. But now, he didn’t want to hide from it. In fact, he wanted more of it. Because he knew Kacchan better now, knew he didn’t want to hurt him or make him feel small, knew he saw him as an equal, a partner.

 

A lover.

 

But Deku didn’t know how to say that, didn’t know how to put the universe of feelings swirling within him into words, so he settled for, “Nothing. You’re just…really hot.”

 

Kacchan cocked his head, striking a smile that made Deku’s groin ache. He didn’t even care if Kacchan teased him as long as he kept looking at him with that drop-dead gorgeous expression.

 

“You think this is hot?” Kacchan kissed Deku’s chest again.

 

Deku nodded. Warmth pooled in his gut as Kacchan dragged his lips downward.

 

“What about this?” Kacchan purred, biting down on the skin just above Deku’s waistline. Deku moaned, the pulse in his pants pounding. Kacchan grinned. “I’ll take that as a yes. Should I stop here?”

 

Deku shook his head. God, no. You better not fucking stop.

 

“Use your words, Deku.”

 

“No. Please, don’t fucking stop.”

 

“Mmm… I like it when you beg.” Kacchan growled, kissing Deku’s hip.

 

Deku sighed, running his fingers through Kacchan’s hair. “Please.”

 

“Please what?”

 

“Just fuck me, Kacchan. Please.”

 

That awoke something feral in Kacchan. His eyes burned with hunger as he met Deku’s gaze, his voice gruff and raw. “Not yet.”

 

Deku’s heart raced as Kacchan unbuttoned his pants and tore the zipper open, yanking them down to his thighs along with his boxers. He trembled as Kacchan wrapped his warm fingers around the base of his cock. He bent down, parting those soft, snarky lips and gently sucking on the tip.

 

Deku groaned, latching onto the duvet beneath him. Kacchan smiled, staring Deku down as he stuck his tongue out and licked the vein on the underside of the head. Holy fuck that felt good. Deku grabbed a fistful of blonde hair as Kacchan ran his tongue along the length of Deku’s shaft and around the top. 

 

“More,” Deku whined. Kacchan lifted his lips, and Deku’s dick chilled and ached in their absence.

 

Kacchan whispered, “You want more?”

 

“Yes,” Deku breathed. “Please.”

 

“You’re fucking impatient.”

 

“You’re fucking sadistic.”

 

Kacchan shot him a crooked smile. “What, you don’t like teasing?”

 

“You don’t tease,” Deku muttered. “You fucking torture.”

 

“I think…you just really want me.” Kacchan licked at that vein again, driving Deku mad.

 

“Of course I want you, you fucking asshole.” Deku panted as Kacchan softly sucked on the vein. “You’re all I fucking want.”

 

“I’m yours,” Kacchan whispered, taking Deku’s cock in his mouth. The words alone would have made Deku cum if he hadn’t been so determined to make this moment last.

 

Deku moaned, arching his back as Kacchan slowly sucked down his length.

 

Holy fucking shit .

 

Deku’s mind emptied, leaving only room for thoughts of Kacchan. His mouth, so warm wrapped around Deku’s cock, his muscles, flexed as he moved atop Deku, and most of all his eyes, still ablaze and staring up at Deku. He was so fucking sexy Deku could barely stand it.

 

Kacchan lifted his lips a fraction of an inch above Deku’s tip to whisper gruffly, “Don’t cum yet, Baby.”

 

Deku groaned. “Maybe don’t call me Baby if you don’t want me to cum.”

 

Kacchan smirked. “Noted.”

Katsuki’s dick throbbed as he crawled atop Deku. His pants were so tight they felt like a straitjacket, and he needed to break free. Now .

 

“Get rid of my pants,” Katsuki said, grinding his hips into Deku’s parted legs.

 

A playful gleam in his stunning green eyes, Deku asked, “You want me to decay them?”

 

“Yes…” Normally Katsuki would have cringed at such a pleading tone slipping from his lips, but he was far from caring about that now. All he could think about was the way those emeralds would roll back in Deku’s head once Katsuki was finally inside of him, the way Deku felt around his cock, squeezing and moaning and screaming.

 

But most of all, Katsuki wanted that special connection that only they could share, a connection so strong it transcended time and pain and reason, a connection not only in body but in their very souls.

 

“Then you won’t have anything to wear,” Deku said, as though he thought that may not be the worst thing in the world.

 

Katsuki chuckled coarsely. “I’ll figure something out.”

 

Deku grabbed his crotch. Katsuki moaned beneath the delicious pressure, making Deku smile. In an instant, Katsuki’s pants were gone, and Deku’s cool fingers were on his burning cock.

 

Katsuki whimpered, coaxing a laugh from Deku. Katsuki’s breath caught in his throat at the sound. It was beautiful and nostalgic, like a melody he used to know but hadn’t heard in ages. He could have listened to Deku laugh forever, but they had plenty of time for laughing later.

 

Right now, what he really wanted to hear was Deku’s screams.

 

“You aren’t afraid of me?” Deku asked softly, gently stroking Katsuki’s dick.

 

“No,” Katsuki said, furrowing his brow. Why would he be scared? Horny? Sure. Rock hard? Absolutely. But afraid ? Not a fucking chance.

 

“You should be,” Deku whispered. His eyes darkened, not in a malicious way, more so with what looked like sadness. It made Katsuki’s heart ache to see Deku look like that. Powerless. Defeated. It reminded him of how Deku used to look when Katsuki had bullied him all those years ago. Katsuki would have done anything to make sure Deku never looked like that again.

 

Katsuki leaned down and gently kissed Deku, parting his lips with his tongue. Their mouths moved slowly, as if forming the words that neither of them could say. Deku’s lips tasted wet and salty, and the thought of those gorgeous darkened emeralds crying made Katsuki’s own eyes heavy with emotion. He squeezed them shut, but not before a few tears slipped down his cheeks.

 

Katsuki yearned to make Deku smile, to make him laugh like he had just moments before, to make him feel good. Really fucking good.

 

But in order to do that, Katsuki needed to have a conversation with him, a conversation he knew probably hadn’t crossed reckless Deku’s mind.

 

Katsuki moved his lips, peppering Deku’s jawline with kisses until he reached his ear. His voice was gruff with lust and desire…and danger.

 

“Are you clean, Deku?”

 

Katsuki smirked as he heard Deku’s breath hitch in his throat. “What do you mean?”

 

“You know what I mean,” Katsuki purred, nipping at Deku’s earlobe.

 

Deku leaned into Katsuki, shivering. “Yes,” he breathed.

 

“You’re sure?” Katsuki kissed Deku’s neck, biting down and coaxing a moan from him.

 

“Yes,” Deku repeated breathlessly. “I had Garaki test me before I came to get you from the dungeon.”

 

Katsuki chuckled. “Why?” he asked suggestively.

 

“You know fucking why,” Deku growled.

 

Deku had planned for this. Fuck, that just made Katsuki want him more. Deku’s voice faltered as Katsuki bit down harder on his neck. “What about you?”

 

Katsuki smiled against Deku’s neck. “Yeah, I’m clean.” He thrust his hips into Deku, wetting his erection with Deku’s precum.

 

Deku arched his brow. “How do you know?”

 

“I get tested all the time,” Katsuki muttered with a chuckle. “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but I’m kind of a manwhore.”

 

Another laugh escaped Deku’s lips, and it sounded like fucking nirvana to Katsuki’s ears. He needed to be inside Deku. Right fucking now.

 

Katsuki shifted his weight so he could lift his hand to his mouth and spit in it. He stroked Deku's cock, slowly, teasingly. Deku arched his back slightly as he jerked his hips, practically fucking his hand. 

 

Katsuki tutted moving his hand away, smirking and Deku growled in frustration. “Fucking tease.”

 

“You know you like it.” Deku's cheeks tinted an adorable shade of pink, just like they used to when he would catch Katsuki staring at him when they were younger, and fuck if that didn’t make his own cheeks heat as well.

 

Deku smiled. “I do like it…” he said, spitting in his hand and wetting Katsuki’s dick with a couple long, slow strokes. 

 

“You want me to fuck you, Deku?” Katsuki groaned.

 

Deku nodded, his eyes bright with a sheen of desire.

 

“Say it.”

 

“Fuck me, Kacchan.”

 

Katsuki struck a devious grin. “Beg.”

 

“Please,” Deku whispered, his voice shooting up an octave.

 

“Good boy, Izuku .” Katsuki knew what he was doing, but he didn’t care. He delighted in the subtle shock that crossed Deku’s expression.

 

“Don't fuck with me, Kacchan.” Deku warned, yet his eyes told a different story.

 

Lightning crackled across Katsuki’s skin, illuminating them both in a bright orange glow. Leaning down so that his lips hovered just above Deku’s, Katsuki grunted, “Do you trust me, Deku?”

 

“Yes,” Deku replied quickly, as if on instinct alone. He took a deep breath before adding, “Do you trust me?”

 

Katsuki nodded, thrusting his cock in Deku’s grip for emphasis. In a flash, Deku’s hand was at Katsuki’s throat.

 

“How about now?” Deku whispered, his tone almost timid as though he didn’t even trust himself.

 

Katsuki lifted his hips, guiding his tip to Deku’s entrance and easing inside. Deku moaned as he purred, “ Yes, Izuku. ”

 

Katsuki placed a sloppy kiss on Deku’s lips as he slowly slid in deeper, muffling the groans still escaping Deku’s throat. He slipped his tongue in between Deku’s lips. Both of them breathed heavily, the unseen ties between them palpable. Katsuki’s heart raced as Deku kissed him back, leaning into him, matching his force in a way nobody else ever had, nobody else ever could have since he’d never felt such passion rattling him to the bone.

 

Katsuki was hungry for Deku in more than just body, ravenous for that delicious intertwine of their souls. He wished they could stay like that forever, that they could no longer be two separate beings but one, interlocked for all eternity. Two equals lost in each other, forever tossed in the thralls of lust…and desire .

 

Deku’s gorgeous emeralds rolled back in his head as Katsuki pulled back and pushed further, each thrust deeper than the last. The slow pace was agony when all Katsuki wanted was more, but the last thing he wanted was to risk hurting Deku in his rush for pleasure.

 

Deku rolled his hips, wrapping his legs around Katsuki’s waist so that he could go even deeper. Katsuki trembled, his body still electrified from activating One for All and making his needs unbearable.

 

Deku yelped as Katsuki hit his sweet spot, bringing a smile to Katsuki’s lips.

 

“Faster,” Deku barked.

 

In a feat of unimaginable self control, Katsuki slowed his thrusts even more. Deku grabbed his wrists.

 

“Faster,” he whined. “Fucking please, Kacchan.”

 

That was all Katsuki needed to hear to come completely undone, surrendering to Deku in a way he didn’t even know he could. He exhaled loudly, grinding his hips a little faster. Katsuki closed his eyes, losing all sense of time and space.

 

When Katsuki finally returned to reality, Deku let out a deep groan and met his gaze. There it was, the connection Katsuki had been craving ever since he’d last tasted it. For a moment, he and Deku weren’t heroes or villains or mortal enemies or long-lost friends or any of the other million dynamics between them.

 

For a moment, they were lovers , and for that moment, Katsuki wished that was all they ever were.

 

Katsuki spoke without thinking. “Izuku, I…” His words trailed off into a guttural moan as Deku rolled his hips, syncing his movements with Katsuki’s thrusts.

 

“Use…your words…Kacchan…” Deku said, his tone as playful as it could be between his heavy gasps.

 

What was Katsuki about to say? That he needed Deku? That he wanted to be his boyfriend? That he wished he could go without food or water or sleep and just stay inside him forever?

 

No. Of course that wasn’t what he was going to say.

 

But what he was about to say was too big, too heavy, especially when they still had so much shit to work out. Katsuki felt it undeniably, god with every fiber of his being he felt it, but…he couldn’t say it. Not yet, at least.

 

So instead of making up some bullshit excuse, Katsuki kissed Deku. He prayed that, like Katsuki, he knew without having to say the words, and by the way Deku’s tongue met his, the grind of his teeth as he bit Katsuki’s lip and the whimpers escaping his throat, Katsuki was pretty sure that he did.

 

Releasing Katsuki’s wrists, Deku wrapped his arms around Katsuki’s chest and dragged his fingernails across his back. Katsuki groaned as the pain heightened his pleasure, sending his body into hyperdrive. He thrust faster and harder.

 

“Kacchan!” Deku screamed, his eyes widening. Katsuki knew that look. Deku was close to the edge, begging to tip over.

 

Katsuki kissed Deku’s chest and neck, all the way up to his ear. “You want to cum now, Deku?”

 

“Yes,” Deku gasped. “Please, Kacchan.”

 

“Okay…” Katsuki whispered, snaking his hand between them and stroking Deku’s cock. “Cum for me, Baby.”

 

The sound of Deku’s screams filled Katsuki’s ears. They were intoxicating, a drug he didn’t think he’d ever get enough of. Deku held Katsuki’s gaze, and that look in his eye that said what a mouthful of sentiments never could, that invisible tether binding them together, the look that bound souls and couldn’t be broken, that fucking look sent Katsuki over the edge.

 

Deku tightened around him as they climaxed together, sending Katsuki into another stratosphere, one he was sure he would never return from.

Notes:

Ahhh will these two ever actually talk??? Probably. Did it happen when it should have (in this chapter)? Absolutely not! ^^ haha. still pretty fun, a little spice to get them ready for some big feelings that are sure to come (but when?? we shall see!). I love getting to explore this side of them, the way their minds work and the pure, raw side of their emotions, how they can't help but be vulnerable in these moments (also WHAT WAS THAT that Kacchan almost said?? ^^). Anyway, as always thank you SO MUCH for reading and staying on this journey with me! I hope you are still enjoying it!! <333

Chapter 13: Finally

The white cotton of Deku’s buttonless shirt gleamed in the moonlight, open and billowing as he stepped into the night. The cool sand tickled his bare feet as he strode.

 

The beach stretched wide around him, bleeding into the darkened sky above, dotted with stars that reflected off the even darker ocean. Though the world around him was fraught with shadows, Deku was pretty sure he was alone with the blonde, shirtless man sitting along the shoreline.

 

“Hey,” Deku said as he plopped down in the sand next to Kacchan, his voice nearly drowned out by the crashing waves.

 

Kacchan shifted his weight, adjusting the bath towel loosely wrapped around his waist. “Hey,” he said, his lips stretched into a smile that crinkled his crimson gaze.

 

Kacchan rarely smiled, rarely did anything but scowl, but the few times Deku had seen him smile, it had never looked like that. It didn’t look forced or taunting or cruel. It looked easy and joyful, like Kacchan wasn’t the angry mess of a man Deku had always known him to be.

 

Deku felt like, despite knowing Kacchan for most of his life, he was actually meeting him for the very first time. Was this the real Kacchan? The tender, vulnerable human being beneath that asshole, war machine facade?

 

Did anyone else know this Kacchan?

 

If they did, Deku had the sudden urge to turn their bodies to ash.

 

“Can I ask you something?” Kacchan asked, his gaze burning into Deku so hot it made him blush. Since when did Kacchan ask him anything, let alone ask if he could ask? The old Kacchan would have just asked and demanded an immediate answer.

 

The old Kacchan. Because there was an old Kacchan now. And this Kacchan, the Kacchan sitting here on this beach with his beautiful ruby gaze drinking in Deku as he patiently awaited his reply, this was the new Kacchan.

 

My Kacchan. The title sent a shiver of exhilaration up Deku’s spine. He nodded.

 

“Will you stay?”

 

Deku furrowed his brow, surprised by the genuine concern in Kacchan’s tone. His eyes were wide and wanting, glistening in the moonlight.

 

“What do you mean?” Deku asked.

 

Kacchan leaned closer, his lips inches from Deku’s ear as he whispered, “Stay with me. Let me keep you safe.”

 

He didn’t need to elaborate for Deku to know what he meant. The life of even an ordinary villain was inherently dangerous, let alone his life as All for One’s chosen successor. Is that what Deku still wanted? To rise as the Demon Lord and destroy the world as they knew it?

 

The world they were in now, where Kacchan looked at him and smiled at him and fucked the living daylights out of him?

 

Everything had happened so fast that Deku hadn’t yet had a chance to consider what his choices meant for his future. He had been training to take over All for One’s quirk and position for so long now. It felt strange to consider that had all been for naught, that he was willing to throw away all of that time and planning and fantasizing, especially for Kacchan, who he was supposed to despise.

 

But the thing was, Deku didn’t despise Kacchan anymore.

 

In fact, he wasn’t sure he ever really had.

 

Deku was hurt, sure, and he wanted Kacchan to pay for the torture he had put him through, wanted him to suffer the way he had for all those many years, but now, Deku knew from the very pit of his tarnished soul that he hadn’t and didn’t and couldn’t ever truly hate Kacchan. Because at the end of the day, no matter how much resentment he had collected and fostered and clung to…

 

…Deku fucking adored Kacchan.

 

And even now, after caressing and kissing and fucking this infuriating man, that adoration felt like pain. The only difference was, whereas once the pain had felt like unbearable anguish slowly rotting Deku from the inside, now the pain felt like a raging fire fueling him, keeping him alive.

 

“Okay,” Deku whispered.

 

His eyes stung with tears as he held Kacchan’s gaze. He wanted to look away, to hide the waves of emotion crashing within him, but he couldn’t. He needed that inexplicable connection they shared when they looked at each other like that, really saw each other, an invisible thread tethering their souls to one another.

 

Kacchan lowered his brow, narrowing his stare. His tone was low and gravelly, so raw it was almost animalistic. “Don’t go back to him.”

 

“I don’t want to, but…what about my quirk?” Deku replied softly, raising his hand, his leathery skin glinting in the starlight as he caressed Kacchan’s smooth cheek. “What about yours?”

 

“We’ll figure it out, but…you have to stay away from him. He’s dangerous, more so to you than anyone else. He can’t be trusted, Izuku.” Kacchan placed his hand over Deku’s. It was so warm, so strong. Maybe it really could protect Deku, keep him safe.

 

Deku thought of his master. He was the most infamous villain the world had ever known, but to Deku…he had been a father, a mentor…a friend. He had seen potential in Deku, something everyone else never saw. He had made Deku feel special and strong and powerful… dangerously so. Deku knew that All for One was evil. He was conniving and vindictive, but Deku had always trusted him because to this point, he had never given him a reason not to.

 

Kacchan, on the other hand, had given Deku every reason not to trust him. From the cruel taunts and outright violence of their youth, to meeting All Might and becoming his protege, to stealing his dreams and becoming the number one hero, Deku’s now sworn enemy…

 

There was no reason Deku should trust him, especially over the man who rescued him from literal self-destruction, but…Deku also couldn’t deny his unfiltered sincerity. Kacchan was a lot of terrible things, but he wasn’t a liar. He never had been, never had any reason to be. Someone with his incredible talents and bold confidence couldn’t be bothered with something as petty as dishonesty. Kacchan was loud and mean and blunt. He wasn’t one to hide from the truth, but to shout it from the rooftops.

 

So…who should Deku trust? The dear villain or dangerous hero? His chosen master who wants to give him the world or the boy that tormented him just for being quirkless? The only father he’d ever known, or the man he’s loved…

 

…yes, loved …for as long as he could remember?

 

Deku shifted his weight in the sand, swinging his leg around and gently landing in Kacchan’s lap. “I won’t go back to him. Fuck All for One. Fuck villainy.”

 

“ Fuck me… ” Kacchan purred, planting a kiss at the base of Deku’s throat.

 

Smirking, Deku quickly scanned the perimeter. “Out here?”

 

Kacchan bit down on Deku’s neck, making him go limp for a second. He sighed, tilting his head to give Kacchan more space to sink his teeth into.

 

“What if someone sees?” Deku groaned softly. 

 

Kacchan pulled away to meet his gaze. “Who gives a shit?”

 

“Aside from the basic public indecency…” Kacchan tutted, rolling his eyes as though he couldn’t care less about petty laws , and he really couldn’t. Deku had seen enough scandals about him on TV to know. A smile spread across Deku’s lips, but it didn’t reach his eyes, nor did it ease the anxious ache in his chest. “I’m a villain, Kacchan. Whether people know who I am or not…and you’re the number one hero.”

 

“So?” Kacchan’s lip curled into that vicious snarl Deku knew all too well. He used to find it frightening. Intimidating. But now, he knew what that mouth felt like pressed against his own, knew how it tasted and moved and bit. He knew he could turn that ugly look into something beautiful, and that made Deku feel fucking powerful.

 

Deku leaned in so close that he and Kacchan shared the same heavy breaths. “If we got caught, it would probably end your career.”

 

“We won’t get caught.” Kacchan said, confident as ever. It was comforting and hot and infuriating all at once. Deku had always believed in Kacchan. He had good reason to be confident in most things, but this confidence seemed to be fueled by his cock rather than his brain, and that was far less reliable.

 

Still…Kacchan wanted Deku. Needed him, so badly he was willing to risk his entire reason for living on him, and that really fucking turned him on.

 

Deku swiftly kissed Kacchan’s neck. Kacchan yelped as though Deku had knocked the breath from his lungs. “But what if we do?” Deku whispered against his skin.

 

“Does it look like I give a fuck?” Kacchan asked breathlessly.

 

Deku’s heart skipped a beat as a dastardly idea formed in his mind. It slipped from his lips before he had the chance to think better of it.

 

“I guess I could always just kill them.”

 

Deku’s tone was playful, but from the bottom of his heart, he meant it. He realized this was crossing a line, but he didn’t care. He would have murdered every last person on earth if it meant preserving what he and Kacchan now had.

 

“Great. Will you just shut up and fuck me now?” Kacchan’s eyes burned with desire as he met Deku’s gaze.

 

Deku pursed his lips, relishing that look, echoing Kacchan’s words from earlier. “You want me to fuck you, Kacchan?”

 

“Is that not what I just fucking said?” Kacchan growled.

 

Deku bared his teeth in a devilish grin. “You sure you can take it?” Kacchan arched his brow. His mind worked behind his narrowed stare, but before he could respond, Deku added, “You want me to show you?”

 

Kacchan smirked, his gaze alight with mischief. “Yeah, how ‘bout you show me, Izuku.”

 

Deku ripped open the towel around Kacchan’s waist, exposing his erection. He slid down in the sand until his lips met the tip, his own groin throbbing as Kacchan’s cock filled his mouth and slid down the back of his throat. He didn’t want to waste time on teasing this time, especially out here in the open when someone could walk by at any moment. He wanted that connection, that look in Kacchan’s eyes when he was inside of him, that feeling of completeness he only felt when they were caught in the binds of shared pleasure.

 

Because Deku knew he was broken, with a long road ahead to becoming fully healed, but for those brief moments of soul-binding, heart-shredding, mind-blowing fucking— No. Love-making …Deku did feel truly whole. Kacchan completed him in a way nothing and nobody else ever had, and he would’ve given anything to feel that way again, over and over, as often as humanly possible.

 

Kacchan groaned. Deku moved his head back and forth, slurping and spitting all along his shaft. He could feel Kacchan’s fingers lacing through his hair and a light pressure on the back of his head as it bobbed.

 

Once Kacchan’s dick was good and wet, Deku removed his lips from the tip with a light pop. Kacchan groaned, still holding onto Deku’s shaggy green locks.

 

Deku shimmied out of his pants and dug his bare knees into the sand on either side of Kacchan’s hips. Smirking, he wiped some spit from the corner of his mouth with his thumb.

 

“Let me help you with that,” Kacchan growled, yanking Deku’s head forward and planting a sloppy kiss on his lips.

 

With the mouths of starving beasts, they devoured each other, licking and biting and gnashing. Their tongues engaged in a vicious dance, a battle for power and dominance.

 

Kacchan tugged on the back of Deku’s loose shirt, slipping it off his shoulders and tossing it in the sand beside them. Deku cupped Kacchan’s cheek and lifted his hips, using his free hand to guide Kacchan’s tip to his entrance.

 

Deku wished he could have bottled the moan that escaped Kacchan’s throat as he lowered himself ever so slowly onto his cock.

 

Deku rolled his hips, allowing Kacchan to fill him completely. He sighed, letting the crashing waves and the wide open sand and the even wider sky and the rest of the rotting world melt away until it was only him and Kacchan lost somewhere amongst the stars.

 

If only it could have always been this way, Deku and Kacchan lost within each other, unhindered by status and expectation and all the other baggage that burdened the living. If only they could find this escape in each other forever, but if Deku knew anything he knew that love was fleeting. Even the briefest glimpses had to be earned.

 

Deku wasn’t sure what he’d done to earn this perfect moment, but he was grateful for whatever it was, and he wasn’t going to fucking waste it.

Notes:

gosh, getting these two to have an actual conversation really is like pulling teeth, isn't it?? 🤣 at least that's starting to happen, even if its slow!! haha im really enjoying this little arc right now. it's fun to explore the more tender side of their relationship that we don't always get to see with all the ANGSTTT. Anyway, I really hope you're still enjoying this fic. I'm having a blast writing it, and I cannot wait to keep going and telling this story. Thank you so much for reading!! ^^ <333

Chapter 14: The Need for Release

The sand burned against Deku’s knees as he rocked his hips, gently riding Kacchan. Their kiss was also gentle, lips moving slowly, rhythmically with the movement of their bodies.

 

Kacchan wrapped his arms around Deku’s waist, pulling him closer and thrusting so he could go even deeper. Deku groaned against Kacchan’s mouth, their heavy breaths practically in sync.

 

Combing his fingers through Kacchan’s hair, Deku clutched the back of his head and tilted it back so he could whisper gruffly, “This isn’t going to be easy. I’ve committed evil. I’ve stolen and tortured and killed. Not even your magic dick can just make all of that go away.”

 

Kacchan struck a devilish grin.  “You really think my dick is magic?”

 

Deku’s reply came in the form of a moan as he rolled his hips so Kacchan could hit his prostate. 

 

Kacchan groaned too, leaning into Deku’s hand as he tossed his head back. “You’re fucking magic…” he panted. “We’ll figure it out… All Might and my friends will help…”

 

“How do you know?” Deku kissed Kacchan’s neck. “They won’t want to help me. I’m the enemy.”

 

Kacchan met Deku’s gaze with fiery intensity. “You’re mine,” he growled, as though that was enough of an explanation.

 

Deku’s cheeks prickled with emotion. He didn’t want to cry, not in this beautiful moment, but he couldn’t help it. His vision blurred and his voice cracked as he whispered, “They won’t understand.”

 

“I’ll make them.” Kacchan’s eyes flared in the moonlight, the same fierce crimson gaze he wore when they were children, each claiming they would be like All Might and become the number one hero.

 

Deku’s chest squeezed at the memory. So much had happened since then, so much he would have never thought possible as a child dreaming of becoming a hero. His younger self probably would have dropped dead if he knew he’d grow up to be a villain, and not just any villain, but the archnemesis of those he admired most.

 

He probably would have dropped dead if he’d known he’d end up with Kacchan, too, for that matter.

 

Kacchan bared his teeth in a snarl as he grabbed Deku’s hips, thrusting himself even deeper. The vicious look on Kacchan’s face boiled Deku, and a myriad of buried emotions bubbled to the surface. He couldn’t help but remember all the words those lips had said, the lips now caressing his neck and jaw, the lips that had told him he was worthless without a quirk, that told him to stay away or suffer the wrath of those explosive fists…

 

…the lips that told him to take a swan dive off the roof of a fucking building.

 

Why did that still piss him off so much? It had been more than a decade since Kacchan had said that to him, and Kacchan had been right when he said they were just kids. Kids say stupid shit, Deku knew that, so why did those words still haunt him? Why could he still hear them as though Kacchan was speaking them right now, and why did his blood boil at the sound?

 

Because…it was him. It’s always been him.

 

Deku gasped, and Kacchan went rigid beneath him, his eyes glazing with concern. “Are you okay? Did I hurt you?”

 

Yes.

 

Deku shook his head, a few warm tears trickling down his cheeks. Kacchan wiped them away with his thumb. “What’s wrong?” he asked, his voice so soft and gentle Deku was surprised it came from him.

 

Deku didn’t want to have this discussion, not now in this beautiful place with the man he’d apparently always wanted. In fact, this conversation was for another time entirely, sometime in the past when his wounds were fresh and would have healed easily with barely even a scar. Now, they were sticky, festering things.

 

Could he still close them up? Could he finally let go of the past and forge this glorious new future with Kacchan?

 

The least he could do was try.

 

Deku tilted his hips, lifting his body so Kacchan slipped out of him. “Turn over,” he commanded, climbing out of Kacchan’s lap.

 

Kacchan arched his brow questioningly, but he didn’t protest. Again, Deku was amazed at how much Kacchan had changed, how he could be tender and caring and considerate.

 

How he could surrender.

 

Because that’s exactly what he was doing right now, as he rolled over onto his stomach and bent his knees, lifting his hips for Deku. Kacchan, the man who never lost, who never gave up, who had to win or would fucking die trying…Kacchan was surrendering to Deku , the man he had once wanted dead just for being quirkless, the man who became a villain with the sole purpose of making his life a living hell, the man he had a million reasons to hate and no reason to love…

 

…and yet, as Deku looked into those eyes squinting up at him, one cheek buried in the sand, he saw it. He didn’t need Kacchan to say it. He knew. He fucking knew that Kacchan loved him, too. He wouldn’t offer himself up this way if he didn’t, wouldn’t give Deku that look that said he’d rather die than lose him, wouldn’t let him see the most vulnerable parts of him, parts Deku guessed he’d never let anyone else see.

 

This was going to hurt. Deku knew that much, and though he would’ve never admitted it, a small, evil part of him liked that. Felt like Kacchan deserved it. He had put Deku through so much pain…a pang of guilt shot through Deku’s chest.

 

Deku’s emotions were fucking strong, and he didn’t always have control over them. In fact, he rarely did. He couldn’t just decide to move on and expect his resentment for Kacchan to just disappear in the blink of an eye. That would take time. A lot of time, but…the affection, the adoration, the… love he felt for Kacchan now was so much stronger than that.

 

Sure, he wanted to hurt him, but he wanted to pleasure him more. He wanted to make him moan and scream and beg for more. He wanted to see the longing in Kacchan’s eyes as their souls collided.

 

Though that little evil part of Deku may have relished the pain he was about to inflict, every other part of him was reviled by it…so he looked away. Deku stared down the empty shoreline as he wet his dick with his saliva and eased inside Kacchan. He couldn’t bear to watch those eyes wince, could barely stand the soft yelp Kacchan released as his muscles tensed against the force.

 

“I’m sorry,” Deku whispered, his slow thrusts inching deeper inside Kacchan.

 

“Don’t be,” Kacchan grunted. His voice was strained and gravelly, as though it took all of his effort just to form the words. “Stop fucking holding back.”

 

Let go. That was all Deku wanted, all he needed. He couldn’t keep holding onto everything, afraid of hurting Kacchan or himself or anyone else, keeping his feelings bottled up until they inevitably exploded.

 

Deku turned back to meet Kacchan’s gaze. His face was pinched and nearly as red as the glare he was shooting back at Deku. “Just give it to me already, Izuku,” Kacchan growled softly, almost pleadingly.

 

“Okay, Kacchan.”

 

Deku sped up his pace, pushing harder with each thrust until Kacchan surrounded him, and though he was buried deep inside him, Kacchan was buried deep within him too, deep within his chest, tugging on his heart like a tether keeping him from floating off into the stratosphere and the weight of that, the weight of Kacchan filling Deku’s heart was painful, but it also felt fucking good —

 

No. It felt fucking fantastic .

 

Deku groaned, each slam of his hips against Kacchan’s ass shattering his pent-up resentment a little more. He needed this, needed to feel Kacchan’s squeeze around his cock like a long-awaited embrace, needed to hear the soft moans escaping Kacchan’s parted lips as his muscles began to relax and pain turned to pleasure, needed to know that Kacchan wasn’t going to run when things get painful like he had so many times in the past, that he could take what he could give, that he could truly change.

 

And dammit he had.

 

Kacchan whimpered as Deku pulled out, practically begging for more with the hungry stare he shot back at him, and though tears still stained his cheeks and tumbled down his lips, Deku couldn’t help but smile.

 

His voice was gentle and nasally as he spoke. “Lie on your back. I want to look at you.”

 

He knew Kacchan would obey. After all, he’d said the very same thing to Deku the first time they’d made love. Kacchan flipped over onto his back without a word. He didn’t even protest when Deku grabbed his ankles and hoisted them over his shoulders.

 

Thank god Kacchan’s so flexible. Deku thought as he adjusted his hips and slipped back inside Kacchan. He leaned forward, pressing into Kacchan’s legs with his shoulders.

 

Kacchan moaned as Deku slid deeper, his eyes fluttering for a moment before locking back onto Deku’s. God , he looked beautiful like that, staring up at Deku like he needed him more than he needed air to breathe.

 

Deku leaned his cheek against one of Kacchan’s legs, kissing it as he curled his hips to slam even deeper. “You like that, Kacchan?”

 

“Yes,” Kacchan groaned, digging his hands into the sand. “I fucking love it.”

 

Deku’s heart skipped a beat. What was that supposed to mean? Kacchan loved the sex? Of course he loved sex, he was a self-proclaimed manwhore, after all, but…

 

…was that what he really meant?

 

Deku let Kacchan’s legs slide off his shoulders so he could lean down. His lips brushed against Kacchan’s as he whispered. “What do you love?” He could barely breathe as Kacchan grabbed his face, closing the distance between their mouths and kissing him mercilessly.

 

“Say it,” Deku panted with a heavy thrust. “Even if you don’t mean it.”

 

“Of course I fucking mean it,” Kacchan snarled.

 

“Then fucking say it.”

 

Kacchan’s gaze burned through Deku like a wildfire. “I love you, Izuku.”

 

“I love you too, Kacchan,” Deku whispered, fresh tears flowing down his cheeks. Relief flooded through him as several pieces of his fragmented resentment washed away into the waves of oblivion. “God, I fucking love you.”

Notes:

omggg i gotta say, im a sucker for a bakudeku confession. tbh i didn't know exactly how all of this was going to go before i started writing, but in the moment it felt right, so I went with it. now, all I gotta say it buckle up cause a storm of angst is brewing!! this is honestly my favorite thing ive ever written, im having so much fun with this au and story, and i really hope you guys are still enjoying it!! thank you so much for reading <333

Chapter 15: Beginning of the End

Katsuki gasped for air, choking on the shroud of thick orange smoke wrapped around his face and naked body. Only his eyes were free, blinking away the blur of sleep and adjusting to the strange dim lighting. His panic lasted for only a second before he realized where he was.

 

Eight high-backed chairs sat facing him in a semicircle, each filled with a former One for All user. Even All Might was there, though his form was much more stoic and ghostly than the others. Ironic, since he was the only vestige that wasn’t actually dead.

 

“Whmm I’hrrr?” Katsuki shouted, his voice drastically muffled by the smoke.

 

Nana Shimura stood, her glossy black hair falling back from her face to reveal her determined scowl. “You think by now you would understand that you can’t speak here.”

 

Katsuki rolled his eyes, the only part of him actually visible in this void. “‘M I ’n trrrble?”

 

Of course these creeps would know about his relationship with Deku, what they’d done…what they’d said. They lived inside of Katsuki, after all, but he didn’t think something as measly as sleeping with a villain would call for a formal meeting.

 

But Katsuki didn’t just sleep with a villain. He confessed his love for the chosen successor of their archnemesis, and he had meant it. He could see how that might be cause for concern with the vestiges. And in this ridiculous place, he couldn’t even defend himself or Deku.

 

Fucking perfect.

 

“Yes, you are in trouble,” Yoichi Shigaraki, the first wielder, spoke up from his chair in the center of the semicircle. “Grave danger, actually, but not for the reason you might think.”

 

Katsuki took a step forward. “J’ss l’mme—”

 

“Shut up,” Nana said evenly, unfazed by the glare Katsuki sent her way. “We don’t have much time. In a few minutes, you will awake coughing up a grotesque amount of blood. You’ll need to replenish your fluids immediately.”

 

Replenish my fluids? What the fuck was she talking about? Was that why he kept coughing up blood? Like Katsuki came so much he was getting dangerously dehydrated?

 

“No,” Yoichi said, as though he could read Katsuki’s mind. For all Katsuki knew, he really could. “This has nothing to do with your…affairs. This has to do with One for All.”

 

No shit. Katsuki had already figured that much out earlier, but instead of trying to talk again and sounding like he was speaking with his mouth full of pudding, Katsuki simply nodded.

 

Yoichi continued, “First of all, we would like to apologize. I’m sure All Might will do the same once you see him again. In fact, he will likely feel the most guilty about the gross misstep we all have made.”

 

Katsuki furrowed his brow. Apologize? Gross misstep? What the fuck was he talking about?

 

“You see, there isn’t any sort of manual when it comes to One for All. It’s one of the least documented quirks on earth, since it’s been kept secret for most of the time it’s existed. Without a way to properly test it, we’ve all had to result to trial and error with regards to how it works, how it's used, and most importantly, how it has evolved over the years, from wielder to wielder.”

 

Katsuki’s vision blurred. He could feel himself already slipping from this world.

 

“We don’t have much time,” Nana said to Yoichi. She hastily turned back to Katsuki. “One for All has historically taken a toll on all of our bodies, least of all Toshinori since he was born quirkless. The combination of quirks in your body has become too much for you, since you were born with a quirk yourself. All for One bought you a little bit of time by alleviating you of your quirk for the time being, but in all honesty, the damage has already been done. You need to find a successor immediately or you will die, and they must be quirkless. If they aren’t, we fear the transfer will likely kill them.”

 

Yoichi chimed in, “We’ve already spoken with Toshinori about this. He will work with you to find a solution.” Katsuki’s mind raced to try and comprehend everything they had said. Yoichi called as his mind fogged and vision blurred, the void closing in around him, “You must act fast or you will perish, and if you do, One for All will die along with you…”

Katsuki woke with a gurgled gasp. He gagged, hunching over and coughing up so much blood onto the white linens on the safehouse bed that he was surprised he had any left in his body once the hurling finally subsided.

 

A creak in the floorboards near the door signaled Katsuki that he wasn’t alone. Of course he wasn’t. It shouldn’t have taken him this long to realize Deku wasn’t in bed with him in the first place.

 

“It’s okay, Izuku. Don’t worry. I’ll be okay.”

 

“Hello, Young Bakugou.”

 

Katsuki’s heart dropped, his eyes flashing wide as he turned to face his master standing in the doorway, hand extended with a fresh towel, presumably for the blood still dripping from Katsuki’s chin.

 

“All Might?” Katsuki whispered, panic pumping through his chest. Had he heard what he had said? Probably. Shit, this was bad. And how had he found him?

 

And what had Katsuki missed in his time away from the real world?

 

But other than Izuku, nobody knew Katsuki better than All Might. He didn’t need to say the words, the Symbol of Peace literally lived inside of him. In fact, that’s probably how he found him, and probably why he didn’t immediately demand an explanation from Katsuki on why he was holed up in a safehouse with the very villain that had drugged them and kidnapped him.

 

“I already know what you’re thinking,” All Might said softly, laying the towel next to Katsuki and taking a seat at the foot of the bed.

 

Katsuki wiped the blood from his face and neck.  “Of course you do,” he muttered, dabbing at the scarlet pool on the sheets. “You probably knew before I even thought of it.”

 

The Symbol of Peace smiled that smile that put the whole world at ease, yet Katsuki couldn’t shake the anxiety creeping up his spine. To say he had wound up in a complicated situation would have been putting it lightly, but there was no going back now, not that he could ever back down from anything anyway, even if he tried.

 

“You love him,” All Might said matter-of-factly.

 

Katsuki nodded, though he knew he didn’t need to for All Might to know he was right. He could see the inner workings of his soul, feel the beating of his heart, and hear the stream of his thoughts as if they were his own. It had taken years for them to develop this essential synchronization, but in times like these, it really helped Katsuki to not have to voice everything going on in his head. He’d never been particularly adept at talking about his emotions, so having someone just understand them without him having to say anything was a fucking blessing if he’d ever heard of one.

 

All Might sighed, his smile sinking into a grimace. “More importantly, you trust him.”

 

“With my life,” Katsuki said without hesitation.

 

“With the fate of humanity?”

 

Katsuki’s breath caught in his throat. Sure, it was easy to sacrifice himself for the greater good, but was he willing to put the lives of everyone in the world in the hands of someone who had committed evil acts?

 

“Yes.”

 

From the bottom of his heart, Katsuki knew that beneath all those layers of resentment and misguided growth, Deku was a hero. He was the same boy that had reached out his hand to help Katsuki when he’d fallen in the river. He was the same boy with dreams of saving people, even after he found out he didn’t have a quirk. He was the same boy who smiled and laughed and chased Katsuki, watching with wide-eyed wonder as Katsuki destroyed everything he held dear in his ruthless quest for absolute victory. Even when Katsuki left him beaten and bruised and bleeding. Even as he jumped from that damned fucking rooftop and held Katsuki captive and hate fucked him, that spark never left Deku’s eyes.

 

And now more so than ever, with his Deku returned and love blossoming between them, Katsuki knew without a shadow of a doubt who his successor had to be.

 

“He will repay his debt to society by becoming the greatest hero the world has ever seen,” Katsuki said evenly, his lip curling up in a smug smirk. “Well, other than me, obviously.”

 

Resigning to Katsuki’s unwavering resolve, All Might simply nodded. “We’ll need to figure out a way to get All for One to take that wretched decay quirk back, in that case. I already have Red Riot and the others running damage control on the stunt you pulled after you left young Todoroki at the hospital.”

 

Shit. Katsuki had completely forgotten about that ordeal. “Did anyone see Izuku’s face? Does everyone know who he is?”

 

“No, I don’t think so.” All Might rubbed his jaw, a pensive look in his tired eyes. “Still, I think it would be good for him to fly under the radar for a while longer, at least until we can get this quirk mess sorted.”

 

“Agreed.” A silence stretched between them for a moment before Katsuki’s scowl deepened, a troublesome thought surfacing in his mind. “Where is he?”

 

The Symbol of Peace sighed, his eyes darting to the nightstand on Katsuki’s side of the bed. Katsuki turned, noticing a scrap of paper there with his name written across the top.

 

Kacchan. Ran to the store to get us some food. Be back soon. -Izuku

 

Katsuki’s heart skipped a beat as he read the name again. Izuku was back. Really back. He could still barely believe it.

 

It took a moment too long for the message to sink into Katsuki’s psyche. He tutted irritably. “Stupid Deku.”

 

“Yes, we’ll definitely need to have a talk with him about distancing himself from the public for a while,” All Might agreed. “Do you think this should be cause for concern?”

 

Katsuki shook his head, understanding the meaning beneath All Might’s words. “It’s just typical reckless Deku, putting himself in harm’s way to make sure I don’t starve or some shit. He won’t go back to him. He’s on our side now.”

 

All Might took a breath as if to say something more, but before he could open his mouth to speak, his voice erupted from his pocket instead. “ A PHONE CALL IS HERE! A PHONE CALL IS HERE !”

 

“Take it,” Katsuki muttered, climbing out of bed still buck naked from the night before. “I’m going to take a shower. I’ve still got sand in my asscrack.”

 

All Might rolled his eyes at Katsuki’s crude bluntness. “I brought a change of clothes for you in the other room.”

 

“Thanks,” Katsuki said over his shoulder as he strutted out of the room.

Delicious steam filled Katsuki’s nostrils as the boiling hot shower water rained down on him. He could hear All Might talking on the phone in the next room, but he couldn’t understand what he was saying.

 

Not that he really cared.

 

He had more than enough mindfuck worries swimming around in his head to concern himself with whatever bullshit some extra was spouting at him. It was probably something dumb like UA drama anyway.

 

That place never really could catch a break, could it?

 

“ARE YOU ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN?!”

 

Okay, Katsuki heard that. It was unusual for All Might to ever raise his voice. In fact, in all the years he’d known him, Katsuki could probably count on one hand the number of times he’d witnessed it.

 

This was bad. Really bad.

 

Katsuki shut off the water and climbed out of the shower, quickly drying himself with a fresh towel and wrapping it around his waist. Just as he was reaching for the doorknob to gather the clothes All Might had left for him, the door swung open before him.

 

The look in All Might’s icy eyes set Katsuki’s teeth on edge. He wasn’t sure he’d ever seen it before. He looked fucking terrified.

 

“What’s the situation?” Katsuki demanded gruffly.

 

The Symbol of Peace took a deep, steadying breath. “The Shibuya Crossing is under attack.”

 

Katsuki’s breath hitched in his throat. The Shibuya Crossing was the busiest intersection in the entire world. An attack there meant massive devastation, likely hundreds if not thousands of casualties.

 

“Let’s go,” Katsuki said without hesitation.

Notes:

WHAT THE HELL IS HAPPENING IN SHIBUYA?! Sorry, I know that's JJK and not MHA but I couldn't not think of that quote while writing the end of this chapter haha. And it's so relevant!! What really is happening in Shibuya?? Don't worry, you'll find out very soon! Ahh I'm so excited to get into this next chapter. Get ready for a wild ride, haha. Also, I loved getting to include the vestiges in this chapter, and finally starting to unpack what's been going on with Katsuki and OFA. Isn't it so cute that he wants Izuku to be his successor? I just think that's so adorable, especially now that they've officially professed their love to each other <3 anywho, I really hope you liked this chapter! Thank you so much for reading!! <33

Chapter 16: Paint the Town Green

Gulping loudly, Katsuki downed the last bit of the large sports drink All Might had forced him to take before he took to the sky.

 

Swinging from street lamps and scaffoldings with black whip, Katsuki quickly flew down the street, though he wasn’t nearly as fast as he would have been with his explosions, and that made him want to break something, preferably All for One’s face, if he ever got the chance.

 

“Young Bakugou!” All Might called from below, running as fast as his weakened form could take him.

 

Katsuki paused, looking back just in time to see another sports drink flying at his face. He caught it with a scoff. “Really?”

 

“You need it! You lost way too much blood!” All Might had almost caught up to him now.

 

Katsuki rolled his eyes. “I’m fine! This shit is just slowing me down!”

 

“Drink it! Now!” All Might shouted, clearly trying to sound stern, but the warmth of his voice just brought a smile to Katsuki’s face. Still, he obeyed, cracking open the bottle before swinging to the next streetlamp.

 

It wasn’t long before the empty street below became jam-packed with cars at a full standstill. Panicked people swarmed the streets and sidewalks. Katsuki hoped there was already some sort of barrier put up ahead to keep the rubberneckers at bay, but with an attack this big, the chances of that were slim.

 

Katsuki slowed, noticing All Might getting stuck on the outskirts of the chaos. “Eijirou and the others are already there?”

 

“Yeah,” All Might said, his voice faltering. “Young Bakugou, you need to be careful. You don’t have any of your gear.”

 

Katsuki shrugged, looking down at the simple tank top and sweatpants All Might had brought him. “What do I need my suit for without my explosions?”

 

“For protection!” All Might shouted pleadingly. “Please, be careful!”

 

Katsuki tutted. “Yeah, yeah.” He took off again, propelling down the street until, at last, the Shibuya Crossing came into view.

 

And for a moment, Katsuki could have sworn his heart wasn’t beating.

 

The ground was alight with blue flames, burning away at the cars and misfortunate bystanders and anything else in their wake.

 

All Might had been right to be worried.

 

Thousands of people swarmed the square, civilians and first responders and heroes alike. The screams bouncing off the tall buildings were so deafening that Katsuki could barely think as he swung right into the middle of the street. He searched the madness for a familiar face, a fellow hero or at least a villain to beat the shit out of, but all he saw was mass terror.

 

Anxiety prickled at the back of Katsuki’s neck as he realized he had never attempted any sort of battle without his explosions. Again, All Might had been right, though Katsuki would never admit that to his face. He did need to be cautious.

 

“Float,” Katsuki whispered, rising in the air just above the crowd.

 

Several villains were scattered about, locked in battle with heroes Katsuki probably should’ve known the names of but never bothered to learn. He figured he should start with whatever asshole was lighting everything on fire, since those blue flames seemed to be causing the most destruction.

 

Katsuki scanned the crowd, quickly spotting a tall, handsome villain with a burnt rubber jaw stitched to his cheeks and spiky white hair.

 

“There you are,” Katsuki grunted, watching the villain burn down an abandoned bus with the blue flames bursting from his hands.

 

Hooking blackwhip onto a nearby streetlamp, Katsuki slingshotted himself across the square and landed near the fiery man.

 

“Well, well, if it isn’t Deku’s little plaything,” Dabi sneered.

 

Katsuki’s cheeks flushed. He deepened his scowl, fury broiling at the thought of this extra ruining his plans for his and Deku’s future. At least the crowd rushing around them was too panicked to take notice, not that they would know who Deku was anyway since he’d never formally debuted as a villain.

 

Deku…

 

Katsuki hoped desperately that Deku was still safe, that he’d made it back to the safehouse and found the note Katsuki had left for him. That little asshole better listen to me for once in his fucking life and just stay put.

 

Katsuki wasn’t too worried about it though. Deku had no way of knowing this massive villain attack was even happening. If he’d known about it beforehand, Katsuki was sure he would have warned him, and Shibuya Crossing was far away from the safehouse. The crowds didn’t stretch far enough for Deku to see from any of the seaside storefronts.

 

Deku was safe. He would wait. He would stay. He said he would stay.

 

Lightning shot across Katsuki’s skin as he activated One for All. He bent his knees, poised to lunge at the fiery man when a familiar voice erupted from the crowd to Katsuki’s left.

 

“Dynamight!” Eijirou barreled from the mass of screams and cries, relief flickering in his hardened eyes.

 

Shit. Did he hear what the villain just said about Deku? Whatever. Doesn’t matter right now.

 

“Let’s go Red Riot!” Orange lightning crackled through the air as Katsuki shot across the pavement, but before he could reach the grinning villain, a wall of searing blue flames appeared around him, engulfing him, scorching him.

 

Katsuki sprung backward, shaking the embers from his clothes. Eijirou joined him with a grunt. “Damn, those flames are hot! ”

 

Normally Katsuki would have smirked and shot back a snide remark like “No shit, dick-for-brains,” but something about the look in the villain’s eyes and the gleam in that infuriating smile made Katsuki’s vision blur until all he could see was murderous red.

 

What the fuck is this asshole playing at?

 

“Oh, come on, Number One. ” Katsuki spun around to find that hideous smile just a few feet behind him now. “What, did Deku fuck the fight right out of you?”

 

A bolt of fear racked Katsuki’s chest. Eijirou leaned in so close that Katsuki could hear his heavy breaths. “Hey, K? Who’s Deku?”

 

Fuck, this wasn’t how Katsuki wanted this conversation to go. Just as he was about to tell Eijirou to stop being an idiot and listening to anything some lowlife villain was saying, the air erupted in thunderous smoke. Shattered glass and concrete fell upon the square like rain.

 

An explosion. Katsuki’s eyes grew wide as panic flooded his veins.

 

The skyscraper directly behind the fiery villain crumbled to the ground, and at the peak of the rubble stood a heaving man in a black velvet cloak, his shaggy green curls billowing in the dusty wind.

 

And in that moment, something in Katsuki’s core shattered into a million billion pieces, as though his heart turned to dust, as though it had decayed into nothing at all.

 

Katsuki’s voice was strained, barely audible over the heightened chaos of the crowd. “...Deku?”

 

This couldn’t be happening. Deku was back at the safehouse, listening to Katsuki, waiting for him, staying for him. He said he would stay. He said he would stay.

 

This must have been a trick. An imposter. Another villain posing as Deku, perhaps? It had to be.

 

“ That’s Deku?” Katsuki jumped, turning to meet Eijirou’s frightened stare. He had completely forgotten that he was there, standing so close he could probably read Katsuki’s thoughts on his face. “You know I’d never judge you, but…you slept with a villain? What the hell is going on, man?”

 

“I, uh…” Katsuki sucked in a deep breath. He wasn’t sure he’d ever been at a loss for words before, tongue tied and choked up in his suddenly parched throat. How the hell was he supposed to explain anything about this hellstorm of a situation to Eijirou right now? It was too much, the past, the present, especially the future…

 

“Hello, Kacchan.”

 

Katuski’s stomach bottomed out as Deku’s face appeared on the countless electronic billboards adorning the buildings all around the square.

 

The screams and cries and shouts swirling around Katsuki faded away, Deku’s words ringing in his ears, and he knew. He knew that was really him. His skin looked smoother than it had before, in fact, it was almost glowing, but the way he said his name, the tilt of his mouth in that playful smirk, the sheen of those mesmerizing emeralds…

 

It was him, but it wasn’t.

 

The light in Deku’s eyes, the blush of his freckled cheeks, the warmth in his smile. He looked even less like himself than he had the night he kidnapped Katsuki, a gorgeous stranger with the face of the man Katsuki would’ve laid down his life for, but without the spark of Deku’s beautiful soul.

 

Where was the man Katsuki had held in his arms, had made love to and talked with and lost himself in just a few hours before?

 

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!

 

Katsuki wanted to scream it, to fly up onto that pile of rubble and slap some sense into the stupid love of his life, but all that came out of his mouth was another warbled whisper. “Deku…why?”

 

Deku’s stare darted to the crowd, his tone dripping with irritation. “Silence, extras. Don’t you know it’s rude to talk during a movie? And the show’s just about to start.” He lifted his hand, and a sheet of ice bursted from him, blanketing the crowd and freezing everyone in place.

 

That is…everyone except Katsuki.

 

The square turned eerily silent, thousands of people frozen in place with only their eyes and noses left bare to dart and huff in panic. Katsuki scanned the crowd, lowering his brow to glower back at Deku.

 

“Great, now that we’ve all learned some basic manners, I suppose I should tell you who I am.”

 

“No!” Katsuki shouted gutterally. He leapt into the air, floating up toward Deku. “Turn the camera off!”

 

Deku’s smirk widened into a frightening grin, his eyes alight with mischief. “All right. You asked for it.”

 

Katsuki came to a dead stop mid-air, hovering before a gigantic screen as Deku’s head disappeared, instantly replaced with…

 

“Holy fucking shit.”

 

Katsuki’s body shook as his face filled the screen. The camera was close, looking down at him from a high angle, but he could still see the sand beneath him.

 

The beach. The angle. Was this footage taken…from Deku’s eyes?

 

Katsuki’s heart dropped into his gut as his voice boomed throughout the silent square. “ Fuck me… ”

 

Katsuki didn’t have to turn around to know that those thousands of eyes behind him, staring up at screens from every angle imaginable, were all widening in horror.

 

But none could possibly be wider than his own.

 

The camera angle switched, looking upward now, at the beautiful man with shaggy green hair and emerald eyes. “Out here?” Deku asked, his smile gleaming in the moonlight, just the way Katsuki remembered it.

 

How was this possible? How could anyone have footage from his own eyes? His own memories?!

 

Katsuki cringed as the angle switched back to Deku’s point of view, looking down as Katsuki bit his neck.

 

Oh god, this was going to be bad.

 

What do I do? Do I run? Like that would’ve really solved anything. Enough had already been shown to cover headlines for god knows how long. Try to destroy the billboards? Again, they’d already seen too much. Plus this shit was probably already streaming to the internet, anyway.

 

“What if someone sees?” Deku groaned. 

 

Katsuki pulled away to meet his gaze. “Who gives a shit?”

 

Katsuki’s breath caught in his throat. In the madness of his lust, he’d forgotten about this part of their conversation. A leaked sex tape was bad, sure, especially with a brand new villain debuting at the Shibuya fucking Crossing—

 

Shit, this was so fucking bad—

 

But this conversation? This would be the end of Dynamight. Forever.

 

He had to make it stop. Right fucking now. And the only way he knew he could was to talk to his traitorous soulmate.

 

The tape kept playing as he shot upward, leering at Deku as he made his way toward him.

 

“Aside from the basic public indecency…I’m a villain, Kacchan. Whether people know who I am or not…and you’re the number one hero.”

 

“So?”

 

“If we got caught, it would probably end your career.”

 

“Is that what you’re trying to do?” Katsuki growled as he landed beside Deku atop the pile of rubble. “You did all of this just to end my fucking career?”

 

Deku’s mouth was still puckered in that smug smirk, but his eyes didn’t smile along with it. In fact, Katsuki could have sworn they looked sad. Hurt. Katsuki sneered. He was pulling this shit and then had the audacity to look like he had been hurt?

 

“We won’t get caught.”

 

“But what if we do?”

 

“Does it look like I give a fuck?”

 

“Turn it off!” Katsuki shouted.

 

“Shh.” Deku purred. “We haven’t even gotten to the good part yet.”

 

Fury broiled in Katsuki’s gut. “Why the fuck would you do this? What the fuck is wrong with you? I was—”

 

Katsuki’s voice cracked as he remembered his meeting with the vestiges earlier that morning. All of his plans, his hopes and dreams, shattered probably beyond repair now. His vision blurred, his eyes burning with tears.

 

“I guess I could always just kill them.”

 

“Great. Will you just shut up and fuck me now?”

 

Deku tutted condescendingly, like a parent scolding an insolent child. “Condoning murder… Begging a villain to fuck you… None of it sounds very heroic, now does it Katsuki? ”

 

That was all it took. That one little word. Katsuki’s own name, of all things. That was the thing that broke him in two. A sob racked his chest, then another, tears streaming down his cheeks. He didn’t even try to hide it. The world around him grew silent, crashing inside him instead. His look pleaded to Deku in a way his throat couldn’t, gasping for breath that wouldn’t come, but all Deku gave him in return was cold indifference, as though that was all they were. A hero and a villain. Rival beasts. Mortal enemies.

 

Archnemeses.

 

Their moans of pleasure filled the square, stabbing Katsuki like knives to his chest. His knees buckled beneath him as he sunk into the crumbled concrete.

 

“Oh, and one more thing. I know, I’m just full of surprises today,” Deku hissed. He untied the cloak from his neck and let it flutter to the ground, exposing his bare torso, now smooth and blemish-free.

 

Katsuki’s soul sunk even deeper, drowning in the murky depths of despair as Deku turned around. His back gleamed with fresh ink. A tattoo. Wings spread across his shoulder blades. A long neck curved down his spine.

It was an enormous black swan. Fucking diving.

Notes:

ohhh deku... deku, deku, deku... what have you done this time? I don't have much to say, but I'm so sorry it took me so long to get this chapter out. Life has been a bit crazyy and tbh it wasn't easy to write after the last couple of chapters. I just can't help the angst, I'm an angsty person with an angsty soul ig ^^ I'm going to try to get the next chapters out quicker than this one, hoping my schedule calms down a bit too! I don't know if "enjoy" is the right word, but I hope you endured this chapter <33 it will get better eventually I PROMISE!

Chapter 17: Agony

The saki tasted salty, mixed with the tears streaming down Katsuki’s face. He wanted to punch himself, fury broiling the liquid fire in his gut. He shouldn’t be crying, not over that stupid nerd, not again.

 

Never again.

 

But still, he couldn’t stop. His self control was shot, no longer a human yet not really a monster. More like a shapeless blob, a phantom drifting through oblivion, a ghost of the man he was mere hours prior. All he could feel was pain, ripping through him, drowning him more than all the tears and alcohol in the world ever could. This pain was suffocating and inescapable, crushing him from the inside out.

 

This pain would kill him, or at least he hoped it would.

 

Katsuki downed the rest of the bottle, a roar tearing from his throat as he threw it at the wall, glass shattering on the hardwood floor. His screams broke, dropping to guttural wails.

 

How could Izuku do that to him?

 

He didn’t care about the leaked sex tape. It was fucked up, but it wasn’t something that couldn’t be fixed. Other heroes had had sex scandals with villains. Sure, he was the number one hero, and the others had never been this…public before, but it was nothing Katsuki’s PR team couldn’t handle.

 

He didn’t care that Izuku had slipped back into his villainous ways. If anyone understood a relapse, it was Katsuki. Plus, evil was all Izuku had known for the past decade, and he’d clearly been brainwashed by All for One. It was difficult to escape that sort of toxic relationship. Katsuki had arrested enough abusive spouses to know.

 

He didn’t even care if the scandal did, in fact, end his hero career. He didn’t think it would come to that, but even if it did, it wasn’t nearly as heartbreaking as the fact that…

 

…Izuku didn’t love him.

 

All that time they had spent together, all the intoxicating emotions Katsuki had felt, the merging of their souls, the look in those glimmering emerald eyes…it had all been a lie.

 

Katsuki needed another fucking drink.

 

“Hey!” Katsuki shouted.

 

After Katsuki had managed to gather up enough B-listers with fire quirks down at Shibuya and they melted all the ice that had trapped the masses, Katsuki had been whisked away to Eijirou and Mina’s place before the press could sink their teeth into him. He had been sequestered in their spare bedroom ever since.

 

“HEY!” Katsuki screamed again, banging on the bedroom door so hard it cracked beneath his fist. “LET ME OUT OF HERE, BEFORE I BREAK THIS FUCKING DOOR DOWN!”

 

Katsuki heaved, fresh hot tears rolling down his cheeks as the door cracked open. Eijirou slipped inside and shut the door behind him.

 

“What the fuck?” Katsuki seethed. “I get publicly humiliated and now I’m a prisoner in your goddamn penthouse?”

 

“You need another drink?” Eijirou asked calmly, revealing the fresh bottle of saki in his hand.

 

Katsuki snatched the bottle, tearing off the cap. “Of course I need another fucking drink.” He took a long swig.

 

“I’m sorry,” Eijirou said softly.

 

Katsuki sneered. “Stop apologizing. You didn’t break my fucking heart.” He scoffed, his cheeks growing hot at the admission. Whatever. Eijirou would probably just assume it was from the saki anyway.

 

“I know, but it's still terrible.” Eijirou took a deep breath, eyeing Katsuki as though he was sizing up a feral animal. “We are doing everything we can to formulate a plan right now.”

 

“Who’s we ?”

 

“Me and Mina, obviously. All Might is here too, along with Hanta and Shouto.”

 

Katsuki’s heart skipped a beat. He hadn’t checked up on Shouto since he’d dropped him off at the hospital, but showing that sort of care now seemed like weakness.

 

Katsuki tutted. “A lot of help Icy Hot will be without his fucking quirk.”

 

A warm smile graced Eijirou’s lips. “He’s doing fine. We’re working on figuring out a way to get his quirk back, too.”

 

Katsuki looked away, relieved for once that his best friend could read him like a book. “Good. So what’s the plan?”

 

Eijirou’s smile faltered, wrinkling in the corner of his mouth as though his words tasted sour. “We can’t…tell you. Not right now at least.”

 

“Why the fuck not?”

 

“Come on, Katsuki…” Eijirou laid a gentle hand on Katsuki’s shoulder.

 

Katsuki immediately shrugged it off. “What? You think I can’t fucking handle it? You think I’m that fucking weak ?”

 

He cringed as a few more tears rolled down his cheeks. Who was he kidding? He was fucking weak, so weak that he had fully submitted to Izuku, that he had gone so far as to fall in love with the bastard. Who was Katsuki anymore? What had he become? The reflection in the floor-length mirror on the far side of the room reflected someone Katsuki didn’t recognize. A broken shell of the titan he once was.

 

And in that moment, Katsuki wanted nothing more than to blow that man’s fucking head off.

 

To think what he could have been if he’d never bullied the sweet green-eyed boy who looked at him like he was a god. To think if he’d not been such a stubborn asshole and faced his faults and fears rather than burying them with all his bullshit. To think if he could have swallowed his pride and talked with Izuku, or god forbid apologized to him, and embraced the deep, unwavering adoration he’d always felt for the nerd but would have rather died than admitted to it.

 

All those years ago, Katsuki would have rather ripped his heart from his chest than admit that he had one, that he had deep emotions for anyone, let alone Izuku, but now he would’ve given anything to go back and punch that dumbass kid in the face.

 

Because no matter how much he hated it and how hard he’d tried to suppress it all this time, Katsuki loved Izuku. He always had and he always would, and that love would always feel like pain. The moments they shared lost in each other were but a vacation from the reality of their relationship.

 

Katsuki had been foolish to think that some mind-blowing sex and finally admitting his pent-up feelings could erase a lifetime of abuse and resentment. He had been foolish to believe Izuku felt anything but hatred toward him, though he had put on quite a convincing performance.

 

Yet, even knowing it had all been a facade, Katsuki’s feelings for Izuku still hadn’t changed. He hated the utter agony of loving Izuku, but even now as his chest continued to shatter with every labored breath and an endless river of tears flowed from his aching eyes, he absolutely craved it. He would go through it all over again, the sleepless nights, the weakness, the suffering, over and over for the rest of eternity if it meant he could relive those few moments of bliss, undone and twisted up with the only man he’d ever love.

 

“Of course not!” Eijirou threw up his hands defensively. “We just don’t know how the whole…you know…camera quirk or whatever works.”

 

Katsuki’s heart skipped a beat. In all of his wallowing, he had completely forgotten about that. He assumed One for All had either given them some kind of recording quirk or used one on their eyes, but he hadn’t considered the obvious possibility that it was still active. In all likelihood, he was still spying on them at that very moment.

 

Katsuki grumbled lowly, “Yeah, all right. Whatever.”

 

He raised the bottle to his lips, but before another drop could reach his tongue, the bedroom door banged open. Katsuki whipped around. The bottle flew from his grasp, shooting backward into another hand, a smaller, softer hand with fingernails painted the same pale shade of pink as the sweater above it.

 

“Inko?” Katsuki huffed, shivering beneath that emerald gaze he knew all too well. This one was glaring at him, though, with hatred or determination he wasn’t sure, but either way it was far more ferocious than anything Izuku could muster.

 

“What the fuck, Katsuki?” Inko demanded.

 

Katsuki cringed. Never in his life did he think he would hear sweet little Inko Midoriya swear, let alone in such a violent tone. It was actually frightening, far more frightening than any villain Katsuki had faced before.

 

Well, all but one, but that was a different kind of fear.

 

Oh shit. Katsuki’s eyes widened, his jaw ticking nervously. The video of him and Izuku…the one that had played on every electronic billboard screen in Shibuya in front of a crowd of hundreds…had also been livestreamed on social media to over a million viewers. Eijirou and Mina had confirmed that during their rush to get Katsuki to their apartment.

 

By now it had probably reached every corner of the internet.

 

So that meant…

 

Well, this was embarrassing.

 

Katsuki winced as his cheeks blushed deeply. He tried to sound as brazen and unaffected as he usually did, but he couldn’t keep his voice from wavering. “Let me guess. You saw the video?”

 

Inko shrieked, whipping the bottle right at Katsuki’s head. Black whip shot from Katsuki’s arm, snatching the bottle just before it could smash into his face. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

 

“Oh, you mean the video of you fucking my son who’s been dead for ten years? Yes, I fucking saw it!” Inko marched up to Katsuki with murder in those eyes that pierced him far worse than the pain of that pretty pink hand slapping him across the face.

 

“I deserved that.” Katsuki grunted, rubbing his jaw. “I can explain…”

 

His breath caught in his throat. He had just lied to Inko fucking Midoriya. He couldn’t explain. How could he explain? He couldn’t tell her that All for One had brought Izuku back from the dead and turned him into a cold-hearted villain. He couldn’t explain who All for One was, and why he was such a big threat to Katsuki. Because that would mean explaining One for All to her, and for her safety, that needed to remain a secret.

 

So…what the fuck was he supposed to tell her?

 

“I don’t need you to explain shit to me.”

 

Well, that was a relief. Katsuki arched his brow, still in disbelief that Inko even knew how to curse.

 

Inko narrowed her stare, scorching Katsuki to the bone. “I want to hear it from my son, Katsuki.”

 

“Well then go get him,” Katsuki sneered.

 

“No, you are going to go get him, Mr. Number One Hero. Go get him and bring him home this instant.”

 

“Fuck that. He clearly doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore.”

 

“Oh really? Cause it sure looked like he wanted you when—” Inko’s voice cut off, her cheeks beginning to burn.

 

Katsuki bared his teeth, a fire igniting in his gut. Anger. That was Katsuki’s comfort zone. All of this sad, heart-wrenching shit wasn’t like him, but anger? Anger he knew better than anything else, and fuck if he didn’t jump into its embrace with open fucking arms.

 

Some part of him knew he was going to regret this later, but the saki told him not to care. “When what? When I had my dick buried inside him?”

 

“Katsuki!” Eijirou reprimanded.

 

Katsuki ignored him, letting his fiery rage fully take the reins, and damn it felt fucking good to dry his tears with in the heat of the flames. “When I fucked the living daylights out of him and made him moan and scream my name and beg for more?”

 

Inko’s face turned so red that it almost looked purple. She opened her mouth as if to speak, but no words came out.

 

“Because guess what, Inko. Apparently that was all fucking bullshit , just like all the other shitty lies he’s told over the years, like being fucking dead. Apparently he was using me , can you believe that? Your perfect little boy who idolized All Might and dreamed of becoming a hero fucked me just so he could fuck me over. Apparently he never even lov—”

 

It was Katsuki’s turn to cut himself off. What the fuck was he thinking, about to complain that Izuku never loved him, inadvertently confessing his own feelings in the process? Admit that it bothered him? That he gave a shit about Izuku’s feelings? That he had hurt him?

 

Well, Katsuki’s cheeks were still tearstained, so that much was probably pretty obvious.

 

A smile flickered across Inko’s hardened grimace. “He never what? Never loved you?”

 

“I didn’t say that,” Katsuki hissed.

 

“You didn’t have to.” The knowingness in Inko’s tone made Katsuki’s skin crawl. “I’ve always known you two had a special bond.”

 

“Oh yeah, hating each other our entire lives and then having meaningless, manipulative sex. Real special bond there.”

 

Inko shook her head, her eyes glistening with tears. “Go get him.”

 

“No,” Katsuki growled.

 

He needed to get out of there, away from Inko and his friends and All Might, away from everything so he could drown his mind with alcohol and anguish, but before he could make a beeline for the door, his vision suddenly blurred.

 

Did this have to do with his issue with One for All? No, he wasn’t coughing up blood. He let out a sharp gasp, and suddenly the world around him lost its color, shadows spreading across his field of vision until all he could see was darkness.

Notes:

heyy im back! sorry these chapters have been coming slower. ive been crazy busy with work, social media, and working on my novel as well. but today is my birthday! so i thought, why not, perfect birthday present for me is getting a new chapter out. wish it didn't have to be the written embodiment of my angsty soul, but i can't help it, its who i am. this chapter was honestly hard to write. i shed more than a couple tears getting through it, but i also loved it and its definitely necessary (i swear this will have a happy ending, just bear with me! ^^) im going to try to get the next chapters out quicker, but we'll see how it goes. thank you so much for reading! i really hope you enjoyed it <333

Chapter 18: Hollow

Kacchan’s voice sounded strange. Distant and muffled. Was he calling face down on his pillow or something?

 

“Deku…” The voice was low. Had Kacchan’s voice always been that low? Maybe he was trying to whisper. His voice always sounded gruff, as though being quiet was something he had to force and still hadn’t quite mastered.

 

“Wake up, Deku…”

 

Deku stirred, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. The room was still dark. Why was Kacchan waking him in the middle of the night?

 

Was something wrong?

 

“What is it, Kacchan?” Deku asked, twisting his hips to turn over and face Kacchan when suddenly his body froze and his mind went blank.

 

This felt familiar. Immobilized, eyelids slack over a deadened stare. Why did it feel so familiar?

 

“Ah. There you are.” The voice was different this time. Clearer. Closer. If Deku’s eyes hadn’t been paralyzed, they would have widened.

 

And here he thought he had truly escaped.

 

Stepping into Deku’s line of sight, Hitoshi ran his hand through his wild purple locks. He had that arrogant smirk on his face that used to drive Deku crazy, but now all he wanted to do was knock his stupid perfect teeth out.

 

Why would Hitoshi come here? Despite their occasional romantic dalliances, Deku and Hitoshi were close friends. Deku trusted him, confided in him even. Why would he hunt Deku down when he knew how he felt about Kacchan?

 

Didn’t Hitoshi want Deku to be happy?

 

“Put some clothes on you fucking degenerate,” Hitoshi sneered, kicking the pile of Deku’s clothes still balled up on the floor.

 

Deku’s muscles sprung into action, his movements quick but mechanical as he got dressed. He hated when Hitoshi brainwashed him, the feeling of absolute vulnerability, the forced surrender to someone else’s will, especially when that somebody was now Deku’s enemy.

 

Deku’s heart sank. Hitoshi was his best friend. Hell, his only friend. Weren’t they closer than this?

 

As Deku slipped into his shirt, Hitoshi slammed his hand down on the bedside table. Deku would have flinched if his body wasn’t under Hitoshi’s firm mental grip.

 

“Here,” Hitoshi growled, pulling back his hand to reveal a scrap of paper and a pen. “Tell him you’re going out.”

 

Deku grabbed the pen and began scribbling on the paper. Going out? Where was Hitoshi taking him? Was it just to talk, or was he dragging him back to the League of Villains?

 

…to All for One? Shit. Shit, shit, shit.

 

Hitoshi grumbled, “Should have just made you leave without a trace like the piece of shit you are, but the less suspicious your manwhore boyfriend is, the better.”

 

Why was Hitoshi being so harsh? His personality had always been dry, but this tone…the murder in his eyes…

 

Why was he so… angry? Was there something more going on here?

 

“Fuck, your thoughts are so damn loud! ” Hitoshi shouted.

 

Wait a second. Since when could Hitoshi read minds? Had his quirk grown stronger since the last time he and Deku had sparred? Had All for One given him a mind reading quirk for his birthday? Shit, did Deku miss his birthday?

 

Suddenly, Deku’s mind went dark.

Deku pursed his lips. “You want me to fuck you, Kacchan?”

 

“Is that not what I just fucking said?” Kacchan growled.

 

Deku bared his teeth in a devilish grin. “You sure you can take it?” Kacchan arched his brow. His mind worked behind his narrowed stare, but before he could respond, Deku added, “You want me to show you?”

 

Kacchan smirked, his gaze alight with mischief. “Yeah, how ‘bout you show me, Izuku.”

 

Deku ripped open the towel around Kacchan’s waist, exposing his erection. He slid down in the sand until his lips met the tip, his own groin throbbing as Kacchan’s cock filled his mouth and slid down the back of his throat.

 

Kacchan moaned.

 

Deku moved his head back and forth, slurping and spitting all along his shaft. He could feel Kacchan’s fingers lacing through his hair and a light pressure on the back of his head as it bobbed.

 

Once Kacchan’s dick was good and wet, Deku removed his lips from the tip with a light pop. Kacchan groaned, still holding onto Deku’s shaggy green locks.

 

Deku shimmied out of his pants and dug his bare knees into the sand on either side of Kacchan’s hips. Smirking, he wiped some spit from the corner of his mouth with his thumb.

 

“Let me help you with that,” Kacchan growled, yanking Deku’s head forward and planting a sloppy kiss on his lips.

 

With the mouths of starving beasts, they devoured each other, licking and biting and gnashing. Their tongues engaged in a vicious dance, a battle for power and dominance.

 

Kacchan tugged on the back of Deku’s loose shirt, slipping it off his shoulders and tossing it in the sand beside them. Deku cupped Kacchan’s cheek and lifted his hips, using his free hand to guide Kacchan’s tip to his entrance.

 

Deku wished he could have bottled the moan that escaped Kacchan’s throat as he lowered himself ever so slowly onto his cock.

 

Deku rolled his hips, allowing Kacchan to fill him completely. He sighed, letting the crashing waves and the wide open sand and the even wider sky and the rest of the rotting world melt away until it was only him and Kacchan lost somewhere amongst the stars.

Deku awoke with a gasp. He panted, sweat dribbling from his temples and down the sides of his face. The dream was so vivid, a memory so real it felt like he had relived it.

 

“Kacchan?” Deku whispered.

 

His vision was hazy, but when he tried to wipe the sleep from his eyes, he found that his wrists were bound. The clank of chains rattled in his ears.

 

Chains?

 

Deku’s eyes flashed open wide. The room was familiar, sterile white walls adorned with steel medical instruments. A chill ran up Deku’s spine.

 

He didn’t need to turn to know the voice that boomed from behind him. “Did you enjoy seeing him again? It’s the only way you ever will.”

 

Deku’s lip curled up in a snarl. “Why have you brought me here?”

 

“Such disrespect.” A wrinkled form dressed all in black stomped across the room, stopping a few feet before Deku.

 

“Fine,” Deku growled. “Why have you brought me here…Master?”

 

For once, All for One wasn’t wearing his mangled metal mouthpiece, so Deku could see the dastardly grin that spread across his shriveled lips. It made Deku want to punch him right in his ugly mouth.

 

And yet, a small part of him was comforted by it, too. Deku was angry with All for One for the years of lying and manipulation, forging him in the fires of cruelty and hatred, but…no matter how much Deku resented him, he also loved him. All for One had been the father Deku never had, and at the end of the day, even Kacchan couldn’t change that.

 

Shit. Kacchan…

 

“What have you done with him?” Deku sneered.

 

All for One arched his brow. “Who? Your filthy little play thing?”

 

“Let him go right now, or…” Deku’s voice trailed off. Rage bubbled up inside him, but he’d never had the courage to be so direct with his master.

 

A dark chuckle escaped All for One’s lips. “Or what?”

 

“...or I’ll turn your bony ass to dust, you fucking bastard.”

 

All for One tutted. “And how are you going to do that?”

 

Deku lunged forward, straining against the chains binding him to his chair. “Release me and I’ll show you.”

 

“Oh, you mean…like this?” All for One swiftly stalked over to the wall and placed his hand on a polished bone saw. It glinted in the light as he pressed his fingertips into the metal, and in a matter of seconds, nothing but ash was left beneath his hand, fluttering to the ground.

 

Deku’s heart skipped a beat. “You took it back?” he asked, despising the quiver in his voice.

 

All for One simply nodded, returning to his place in front of Deku. “You’ll be pleased. Your skin has already recovered. It’s as smooth as the day I met you.”

 

“Release me,” Deku demanded evenly.

 

A smirk graced All for One’s lips. “Right now?”

 

“Yes, right now. Kacchan, too.”

 

“You’d be quirkless.”

 

“I don’t care!” Deku rattled his chains. Fury and fear burned in his veins like lava, setting his chest ablaze. He needed to find Kacchan. He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want any part of this. Not anymore. He wasn’t this person anymore.

 

He wasn’t a villain anymore.

 

“Let me out of here, dammit!” Deku roared.

 

“Calm down. I didn’t take your precious whore. ”

 

Deku’s breath hitched in his throat, a cool rush of relief flooding through him. Kacchan was safe, or at the very least, he wasn’t here…for now.

 

Deku needed to switch tactics. If Kacchan wasn’t here, he could play the part, regain All for One’s trust, and with any luck, regain his freedom. “Master, please remove my chains.”

 

All for One laughed again. “What? So you can decay me? Oh, wait, that’s right. You can’t even do that anymore.”

 

“That’s right. I can’t. I’m not a threat. Please, just take them off. They’re bruising my wrists.”

 

“Oh, boo hoo,” All for One said mockingly. Deku clenched his jaw to keep his lashing tongue at bay. All for One took a step forward, narrowing his stare. Was that…tears in his eyes?

 

His voice was coarse and low as he spoke. “It’s too bad really.”

 

“What?” Deku whispered, genuinely curious. He’d never seen his master look so…vulnerable. Had he really been so bothered by Deku’s escape?

 

All for One shook his head, clearing his throat before continuing in a much steadier tone. “Do you know why I chose you all those years ago? The quirkless boy with messy green hair and tearstains on his freckled cheeks? Why did I choose you when I already had a perfectly good option? Tenko was already in my care, already possessed my decay quirk. So what about you…changed my mind?”

 

Deku furrowed his brow. Where was All for One going with this? Was he trying to make Deku feel guilty for leaving? Maybe shame him for choosing to follow a hero rather than stick with his villain family?

 

Or perhaps he just wanted to make him feel…worthless. A disgrace to his legacy. Deku couldn’t deny that title.

 

“What do you want from me?” Deku asked through gritted teeth.

 

All for One cocked his brow. “Answer the question.”

 

“Why you chose me?” Deku chewed on the inside of his lip as his mind worked to find a suitable response.

 

He had no idea why All for One had chosen him. All he could remember was the overwhelming rage building within him as he walked down that street, the same overwhelming rage he had fostered over the years, the same overwhelming rage he could probably summon now if he wanted.

 

Deku bared his teeth. “You chose me…because I was angry.”

 

“Sure, to put it mildly. You weren’t just angry. You were furious. Filled to the brim with utter hatred, conveniently directed at my greatest adversary.”

 

“Why are you bringing this up right now? What the fuck does it have to do with anything?”

 

All for One shot Deku a knowing smirk. “Your anger, as you put it, is powerful Deku. That’s what drew me to you. And not only your anger. All of your emotions are strong, so strong that they are nearly palpable in the air around you. Like a forcefield.”

 

A shiver rippled down Deku’s spine, his eyes widening in realization. “Like a quirk.”

 

“Precisely. Perhaps they are the remnants of a latent quirk within you that, for whatever reason, could not fully manifest. Perhaps not. Nevertheless, they are your greatest power…but they are also your greatest weakness.”

 

“How so?” Deku asked, cringing at the eagerness in his tone.

 

“It’s simple really. My quirk is strong on its own, but it is amplified with hatred. I possess a fair amount of hatred.”

 

“Now that’s putting it mildly.”

 

All for One chuckled. “Fair enough. But you…your hatred…it blows mine out of the water quite frankly. With my quirk, you would be utterly invincible.”

 

Deku’s heart raced. That’s why All for One chose him? Because his hatred was so strong, stronger than even his master’s? Deku wasn’t sure that was even possible. Sure, his hatred was strong. Hell, all of his emotions were strong, just like All for One had said, but he didn’t know they were that strong. He wasn’t even sure that was humanly possible.

 

If his hatred made him powerful, then what made him weak?

 

Deku knit his eyebrows together as his cheeks began to sting, fresh tears brimming his eyes.

 

“You can’t make me stop loving him,” he whispered, his voice cracking far back in his throat.

 

“I can,” All for One stated firmly, waving toward the door behind Deku, “and I will.” A bang, followed by shuffled footsteps. Garaki appeared at All for One’s side. “He’s ready.”

 

“No!” Deku shouted, warm tears trickling down his cheeks. “Garaki, wait. Please don’t do this. I swear, I’ll do anything else. I’ll take your quirk, Master. I’ll rejoin the League. I’ll never see him again, but please. Don’t take it away. It’s all I have left of him! ”

 

“Oh, that’s not true,” All for One hissed. He gestured toward a small TV screen fixed on the wall to Deku’s left.

 

It lit up. A mess of spiky blonde hair and piercing crimson eyes filled the screen.

 

“You want me to fuck you, Kacchan?”

 

“Is that not what I just fucking said?”

 

Deku’s jaw dropped as the image switched to Kacchan’s point of view. Suddenly he was looking at his own shaggy green hair and tired bedroom eyes. Panic pounding in his chest. How the fuck was this even possible? Had All for One gotten some sort of memory-stealing quirk? Was this how Hitoshi had found Deku so quickly?

 

What else had his master seen?

 

Everything? Goddamn it.

 

“Look familiar?” All for One purred. “How silly of me. Of course it looks familiar. It’s your memory, after all.”

 

“Yeah, no shit it’s my memory. How the fuck did you do that?”

 

“Such filthy words from such a pretty mouth.”

 

If Deku’s blood hadn’t been replaced with liquid fear, he probably would have rolled his eyes at that, but all he could think about was Kacchan. Garaki grabbed some sort of metallic helmet contraption from the wall and a syringe from a small table. Deku didn’t know what they were exactly, but he knew what they would do.

 

He was losing him. He was losing Kacchan, forever this time.

 

Deku practically screamed, sobs wracking his chest as he spoke. “Please don’t do this, Master. I’ll do anything you want. Just please don’t take my love away. I won’t survive it.”

 

“Don’t you want to know how I stole your memories? And what I plan to do with them?”

 

Deku’s breath caught in his throat. “Tell me.”

 

All for One struck a smile that made Deku want to grab him by the hideous wrinkles and tear his entire face off. “Garaki helped, of course. He created a special serum using a psyche quirk I stole a few months back.”

 

“I don’t care how you did it,” Deku snarled. “What are you planning to do with them?”

 

A downright insidious chuckle escaped his master’s lips. “Nothing much, really. Just show a few billion of my closest friends. The internet is a truly wonderful invention.”

 

Deku hardened his stare. So that’s what this was about. All for One didn’t care about Deku or their legacy or any of that bullshit. He was, like he had always been, only concerned with his ultimate goal.

 

Destroying One for All, and defeating his brother once and for all.

 

The release of that tape would end Kacchan’s career, and Deku was certain that was just the beginning of his master’s plans. Every muscle in his body grew taut with fury. His voice was deathly calm, the voice of a cold-blooded killer.

 

“No.”

 

Garaki slammed the helmet on Deku’s head and ripped the arm of his shirt clean off from the shoulder seam.

 

“Do whatever you want to me. Rip my soul to shreds until all that is left of me is hatred, but don’t you fucking dare hurt him.”

 

All for One arched his brow. “Or what?”

 

“Or I’ll release this supposedly all-powerful hatred on you, you fucking bastard.” Deku spit at his master’s feet.

 

“So filthy…” All for One stepped around the soiled floor, leaning down to see Deku eye-to-eye. They were so close that Deku could feel the heat of his breath on his tearstained cheeks.

 

All for One was still wearing that sickly smile as he spoke. “Don’t worry, Deku. I won’t be the one hurting your precious whore.”

 

Deku lunged forward, teeth bared and ready to strike the pathetic bit of flabby flesh that served as his master’s nose when suddenly it felt as though his body was on fire. Electricity coursed through his veins, jolting his limbs into the most absurd angles they could manage within his restraints.

 

Deku glued his stare on the screen. Memorizing it. Kacchan’s eyes wide with desire. His mouth parting in a moan. He couldn’t forget.

 

He couldn’t forget…

 

A ringing filled Deku’s ears. It was so piercing that he thought they might start bleeding at any moment.

 

All for One's voice was faint, muffled by the god-awful ringing, but Deku was pretty sure he said something like, "Let's hope it sticks this time." This time? Had he heard that right? Had All for One and Garaki done this to him before? When? How many times?

 

Another jolt of electricity jumbled Deku's thoughts. His heart was beating so fast. His heart. The way it dropped when Kacchan shot him that stare. When he held him and kissed him and fucked him.

 

He couldn’t forget. He’d never forget.

 

A second, stabbing pain shot through Deku’s arm as Garaki plunged the syringe into it, sending an even more crippling wave of agony throughout his entire body.

 

Deku forced his gaze to remain on that screen. The feeling of his soul intertwining with Kacchan's. The raw, unbridled love he felt, they both felt. He dug his claws into it. Clung to it. Begged for it.

 

God, don’t let me forget it.

 

The ringing grew louder and louder. Surely he would soon go deaf from the scream. The scream. Deku gasped, and the ringing paused for half a second.

 

It wasn’t a ringing at all.

 

It was the screams erupting from his own burning throat.

 

They drowned out every thought in his head, every pound of his pulse, every notion in his chest until he was nothing but screams and pain. He prayed for the mercy of darkness, of sleep. He didn’t even care if he ever woke up, anything to escape this torture.

 

Moments felt like eternities, every second shattering another piece of Deku’s soul. His being gave way, bit-by-bit, until all that was left was agony.

 

No.

 

Deku panted, his skin thick with a sheen of sweat. The pain was gone, but the fire in his veins remained. His body felt empty, yet somehow heavy with what he could only describe as darkness. Soullessness.

 

Deku’s heartbeat had slowed, or maybe even stopped. He couldn’t feel it anymore. In fact, he couldn’t feel much of anything anymore.

 

Take a swan dive off the roof of the building.

 

Well, anything but hatred.

Notes:

Another chapter down (finally!). Poor Deku 33 I feel so bad for him and Kacchan right now. But at least we finally get to see what happened to him, and why he did what he did in Shibuya. Again, this chapter was particularly difficult to write. I hate hurting them, but it really is all necessary for the story (and let's be real, I'm addicted to angst at this point). There will be comfort though! I know it doesn't feel like it right now (definitely doesn't for me), but I promise there will be!! Not immediately but in the somewhat near future ^^ Anywho, I really hope you liked this chapter, and thank you SO SO MUCH for reading and sticking with me even when things are really, really bad <333 I appreciate you so much!! Alright, on to the next chapter!

Chapter 19: Midoriya Izuku, Falling

“Deku—” Hitoshi’s voice cut off in a low groan.

 

“Shut the fuck up, Hitoshi.” Tightening his grip on Hitoshi’s hips, Deku thrust deeper inside him.

 

Hitoshi gasped, his eyes rolling back in ecstasy. He craned his neck to meet Deku’s gaze behind him. Those emeralds were dull and deadened, the hollow stare of an empty soul. Hitoshi hadn’t seen that stare in a long time, but he knew what it meant.

 

This wasn’t Deku.

 

This was the monster All for One molded him into. And Deku, the real Deku was trapped somewhere inside this rage demon. Tortured. Fucking screaming.

 

“Deku, wait. Can we just talk for a sec—”

 

Grabbing a fistful of wild purple hair, Deku slammed Hitoshi’s face into the wall. He pushed up against Hitoshi’s body, sliding even deeper into him. Hitoshi moaned, Deku’s breath hot on his neck.

 

“You want me to stop?” Deku whispered gruffly.

 

Hitoshi panted heavily. Of course he didn’t want Deku to stop. This is all he ever wanted. All he ever fucking craved. He would have had Deku just like this forever if he could have.

 

But he couldn’t. And he wouldn’t. Because Deku wasn’t his, and this wasn’t real, wasn’t love. Deku didn’t want him that way, didn’t feel the way Hitoshi felt. No, Hitoshi was nothing more than a distraction for Deku. A punching bag to vent his frustrations, just instead of using his fist, he preferred to use his dick.

 

Well, and occasionally a fist too, if Hitoshi was being honest. But that was beside the point.

 

“No,” Hitoshi breathed, his voice dripping with guilt. He couldn’t lie to Deku, no matter how pathetic it made him feel. “Don’t stop—”

 

Another thrust. Another moan. A single tear dribbled down Hitoshi’s cheek, wetting the drywall still pressed to his face.

 

Hitoshi could pretend.

 

Pretend that Deku also yearned for him in every waking thought. Pretend that Deku’s chest was also set ablaze every time they fucked. Pretend those three little words that bore the weight of lifetimes also danced on Deku’s tongue, trapped in moans and heavy breaths so they couldn’t escape and crack the world in half.

 

So that’s what Hitoshi did. He closed his eyes and pretended.

 

And once his throat was hoarse from screaming and Deku’s cum dripped down the back of his legs, Hitoshi finally let out a raspy whisper.

 

“I love you…”

 

But Deku had already stalked across the room and disappeared into the bathroom.

 

So he would never hear it.

Deku growled at his reflection in the bathroom mirror as he cleaned himself up with a towel, nearly rubbing his dick raw.

 

Fucking Hitoshi hadn’t helped alleviate an ounce of his blood-boiling fury, and Deku had no idea why. It had always helped in the past, when he felt like he needed to do something, anything, for a few minutes of relief from the utter rage searing him from the inside-out.

 

So why now, after some relatively decent sex, did he still feel like ripping someone’s head off with his bare hands? If anything, he felt even angrier than he had before.

 

Maybe he should go again?

 

“Hey.”

 

Deku’s gaze snapped up, eyeing Hitoshi in the doorway behind him through the dirty mirror’s reflection. But Hitoshi’s stare was lower, inspecting Deku’s back.

 

“What is it?” Deku snapped. “Never seen a fucking tattoo before?”

 

Hitoshi quickly lowered his gaze to the floor, but not quick enough for Deku to miss the despair in his eyes.

 

“Of course I have,” Hitoshi whispered. “You done with that towel?”

 

Deku tossed the towel to Hitoshi, shooting him a steely stare. “Then what the fuck were you staring at?”

 

Hitoshi wiped down his legs and ass, tying the towel around his bare waist. “It’s just… Doesn’t it bother you?”

 

“What? The tattoo?” Deku quipped.

 

Hitoshi nodded.

 

“No. Why would that fucking bother me? It’s great. The perfect reminder of all that I have to be hateful for.”

 

Taking a deep breath, Hitoshi met Deku’s hardened gaze. “Well…it bothers me.”

 

Deku furrowed his brow. “Why the fuck would it bother you? ”

 

“Because I think it’s meant to hurt you. To kill you, really. All that it represents. This path…it only leads to your demise, Deku.”

 

“The fuck are you talking about?” Deku took a step toward Hitoshi. “You saying All for One is trying to kill me?”

 

Hitoshi inhaled sharply, his voice shaking as he responded. “Yes. That’s exactly what I’m saying.”

 

Deku chuckled darkly. “You’re an idiot. I’m the master’s successor. Why the fuck would he put so much time and effort into training me if he was just going to kill me?”

 

“He’s trained your body, ” Hitoshi whispered. “I think he and Garaki have figured out a way to transfer his consciousness into you. And once you grow old and feeble, he’ll find another successor to possess.”

 

“I guess I really did fuck your brains out,” Deku sneered, “because that’s fucking insane.”

 

“It’s not,” Hitoshi said firmly. “He wants to become immortal.”

 

“Fuck off.” Deku waved his hand dismissively. He didn’t have the time nor mental capacity for this delusional conversation. All for One would be expecting him any minute now.

 

“Please…” Deku’s muscles tensed as Hitoshi grabbed his forearm. “Don’t go. I can get you out of here. We can find a way out of this.”

 

“Fuck off,” Deku repeated, a harsher bite to his tone. “We need to get ready.”

 

Hitoshi tightened his cool grip on Deku’s warm skin. “If you jump, you’ll die. For real this time. He’s not going to bring you back.”

 

Deku scoffed. “Once I resurrect with all of All for One’s powers, remind me to kick your fucking ass.”

 

He saw a deep pain flicker in Hitoshi’s widened stare, but he really couldn’t have given less of a shit.

A warm wind fluttered through Deku’s long curls as he stepped through the door, just like he had a decade ago. This time he wasn’t running. Wasn’t scared. Wasn’t being chased by the stupid boy who had made his childhood a living hell.

 

No, this time, Deku was fucking ready, and all he could feel was the rage broiling in his veins.

 

“Wait,” All for One called as Deku approached the ledge surrounding the rooftop.

 

Deku paused, shifting his weight as All for One glided to his side. “Why? I’m ready. Let’s get this shit over with.”

 

All for One laid his hand on Deku’s shoulder. Lightning crackled on his fingers, tiny golden shocks crackling across Deku’s skin.

 

“The fuck are you doing?” Deku demanded as the electricity seeped into his skin. His body rapidly grew heavy, and his eyelids began to droop.

 

“I have to take back your quirks.” All for One stated as though that was the most obvious thing in the world.

 

“What? Why?” Deku asked, his tone shooting up an octave.

 

“My resurrection quirk works better on quirkless people.” All for One shrugged, taking a step back and removing his hand from Deku’s shoulder. “You’ll get them back, along with the rest of my quirks, once the ritual is complete.”

 

Deku’s heart skipped a beat. All for One had just removed his quirks. He was quirkless. Again. Jumping from this roof. Again.

 

Maybe Hitoshi had been onto something.

 

Maybe All for One really was just trying to fuck with his emotions. Because this fucking hurt. This made him want to burn the whole building to the ground.

 

“All right. Up you go, “ All for One announced, taking a few more steps back.

 

Deku stepped up onto the ledge. His vision went a little hazy, but he shook it off. It was natural to be a little nervous when preparing to hurl yourself off the roof of the building. He wasn’t having second thoughts. In fact, he wasn’t capable of it. He was fueled purely by rage. He wanted this.

 

He wanted this.

 

It was just nerves. It had to be.

 

All for One added,  “Today marks the beginning of a new era. Thank you for your courage, your dedication, and most of all, your unyielding rage. I couldn’t have asked for a more fitting successor. Very soon, you will receive the revenge you’ve craved, we’ve both craved for far too long. And what a glorious day for the occasion. Don’t you just love a thunderstorm?”

 

Deku looked up, but instead of seeing stormclouds, his vision went entirely black.

“Yeah, all right. Whatever.”

 

Deku felt his mouth moving, but it was Kacchan’s voice escaping his throat. Kacchan… Deku would have gasped if he had been in control of this body.

 

What was going on here? Was Deku seeing through Kacchan’s eyes? Why? His vision was hazy. Kacchan must’ve been pretty plastered.

 

Fuck this shit. Deku didn’t have time for any more of Kacchan’s bullshit. He would deal with him later, ideally with his hands around Kacchan’s throat so he could blow his head off with his own goddamn quirk.

 

Because that’s what he deserved. Fucking bastard.

 

A bottle raised to his lips, but before a single drop reached his tongue the bedroom door banged open.

 

Why was Deku seeing this? Some sort of malfunction with the memory quirk? A sort of psychic connection?

 

The memory quirk…wait. Was this even happening right now, or was it just a memory?

 

Kacchan whipped around. The bottle flew from his grasp, shooting backward into another hand, a smaller, softer hand with fingernails painted the same pale shade of pink as the sweater above it.

 

Deku’s heart dropped into his feet. A spark flickered in his soul, and for the first time in what felt like forever, that spark wasn’t hatred. Wasn’t rage. It was something warm and soft, pooling down deep in his phantom chest.

“Mom?” Deku silently whispered.

 

“Inko?” Kacchan huffed, shivering beneath that emerald glare.

 

All for One had prepared him for this. Well not this specifically, the strange psychic connection and all that, but seeing his mother again. He had reminded Deku of her words so many years before, when he was young and quirkless and doomed to a life of mediocrity.

 

“Do you think I can be a hero, too?”

 

“I’m sorry, Izuku…”

 

Those words still haunted Deku to this day. They should have fed his flames of fury just as much as “Take a swan dive off the roof of the building” always did.

 

But looking in his mother’s eyes, seeing that pain and worry and determination and… love, Deku couldn’t fight the affection igniting in his soul.

 

“What the fuck, Katsuki?” Inko demanded.

 

Kacchan cringed. His eyes widened, his jaw ticking nervously.

 

Oh shit.

 

Oh shit.

 

The heat blossoming in Kacchan’s cheeks felt so real Deku could have sworn it was his own. His mother, his mother, had seen the sex tape. Of course she had. Everyone in the world had probably seen it by now.

Because he had leaked it. Fucking hell…

 

Kacchan tried to sound as brazen and unaffected as he usually did, but he couldn’t keep his voice from wavering. “Let me guess. You saw the video?”

 

Inko shrieked, whipping the bottle right at Kacchan’s head. Black whip shot from Kacchan’s arm, snatching the bottle just before it could smash into his face. “I’ll take that as a yes.”

 

“Oh, you mean the video of you fucking my son who’s been dead for ten years?”

 

Something cracked inside Deku beneath the weight of those words. He had been dead, dead, to her for ten fucking years. Sure, he already knew that. Of course, on some level he did, but he’d been so caught up in his own bullshit that he’d never really processed it.

 

The woman who made his favorite katsudon. The woman who sang Christmas carols with him as they walked to the supermarket even if it was mid-July. The woman who held him and fed him soup when he was sick.

 

“The woman who crushed your dreams, just as much as those degenerate heroes.” That’s what All for One would have said, but is that really what Deku believed?

 

“Yes, I fucking saw it!” Inko marched up to Kacchan with murder in her eyes and slapped him across the face.

 

Deku barely felt the sting. It was nothing compared to the pain of his heart shattering. A heart he thought he had lost. A heart he didn’t even know he had.

 

“I deserved that.” Kacchan grunted, rubbing his jaw. “I can explain…”

 

“I don’t need you to explain shit to me.” Inko retorted.

 

Kacchan arched his brow.

 

Inko narrowed her stare. “I want to hear it from my son, Katsuki.”

“She wants to see me…” Deku muttered.

 

His head was still thrown back, eyes wide. He blinked as a flew raindrops plummeted from the darkened stormclouds high above.

 

Deku’s breath caught in his throat. “Kacchan always hated the rain…”

 

What was he doing? Frozen, staring up at the sky, fucking dawdling. That vision meant nothing. So what if his mother wanted to see him? That didn’t change anything. It shouldn’t even be surprising.

 

And who gave a shit if Kacchan hated the rain? He needed to get a move on.

 

“What’s taking you so long?” All for One asked. He didn’t sound angry or concerned, more like genuinely curious. “You’ve been staring at the sky for three whole minutes.”

 

“Sorry, Master,” Deku uttered, lowering his chin and brushing the rain from his eyes. “I think that memory quirk is acting up.”

 

“That isn’t possible,” All for One spat. “I took all of your quirks back not ten minutes ago. Are you feeling okay?”

 

That’s right… All for One had taken back all of Deku’s quirks. How then…how was it possible that he had seen Kacchan’s vision or memory or whatever? Had he really just imagined that? A coping mechanism his brain had cooked up to keep him from killing himself yet again?

 

It wasn’t real. His mom probably didn’t give a shit about him being alive. Kacchan was probably thinking up ways to torture Deku to death for betraying him.

 

It wasn’t real. It couldn’t have been real.

 

Yet still…Deku was frozen.

 

“Go, Deku!” All for One called, his tone a bit more frantic than before. “We have work to do! We don’t have time for your lolligagging!”

 

“I…” Deku whispered. “I can’t…”

 

“Why the hell not?”

 

The vision wasn’t real. Hitoshi was full of paranoid delusions. This was the next step, the final step, before Deku could finally be crowned Demon Lord. It’s just one step, a bit of pain, then all his dreams would come true.

 

It’s just one step…so why couldn’t he fucking move?

 

“I…don’t know.”

 

“Hitoshi!” All for One barked.

 

Hitoshi raised his brow. “Yeah?”

 

“What are you waiting for?” All for One motioned toward Deku. “Give him a little push.”

 

Scoffing, Hitoshi turned away from him. “I’m not pushing Deku off the roof of a goddamn building.”

 

All for One rolled his eyes. “Not literally. With your quirk.”

 

Hitoshi’s jaw dropped, hanging open as he breathed heavily. “Are you fucking crazy? You want me to brainwash him into jumping?”

 

“Yeah,” Deku piped up. His mind was a mess of confusing thoughts and emotions. He didn’t have the wherewithal to sort through them and make the move himself right now. This was the only way. “Do it.”

 

Hitoshi’s piercing stare darted between All for One and Deku for a moment. His voice was low and gruff when he finally responded, “No.”

 

“Do it, dammit!” Deku roared. “I can’t do it on my own right now! I need you to do it!”

 

“I can’t,” Hitoshi screamed, dropping to his knees. “I fucking can’t…”

 

All for One stomped across the roof, stopping near the ledge where Deku stood. That was fine, too. His master could just push him. This would all be over soon.

 

All for One’s hand shot out, but to Deku’s surprise, it didn’t push him from the ledge. Instead, it wrapped around Deku’s throat and squeezed. Deku gasped, blowing out the last of his air supply in one fell swoop.

 

“No!” Hitoshi shouted, bouncing to his feet and shooting across the rooftop.

 

“Wha- Why-” Deku choked. He reflexively clawed at his master’s fingers, but they wouldn’t budge.

 

“Ah, ah, ah…” All for One held up his free hand. Hitoshi skidded to a stop. “Brainwash him now or I will kill him right here, and I won’t bring him back.”

 

“You were never going to bring him back anyway!” Hitoshi screamed. A pulsing blackness clouded Deku’s vision, but he could still just barely make out the streaks of tears streaming down Hitoshi’s cheeks. "What? Not going to defend your bullshit actions?"

 

But All for One was too smart for Hitoshi's trick. After all, it wasn't a secret amongst the League that Hitoshi's quirk could only be activated if someone responds to something he has said to them. So instead of falling into that trap, All for One simply shook his head and tightened his grip around Deku's throat. Deku’s eyelids drooped shut, his head lolling to the side.

 

Hitoshi’s lip curled back in a snarl. “Fine! But if you don’t bring him back, I swear to god I’ll make you rip out your own throat.”

 

A hideous smile spread across All for One’s wrinkly lips. He loosened his grip a bit. Deku coughed, gasping desperately for air.

 

“Hey Deku?” Hitoshi whispered, his tone thick with emotion.

 

Deku tilted his head, his bloodshot eyes still half-shut. “Yeah baby?”

 

Hitoshi choked on a sob as Deku’s body went stiff. His eyes flashed open wide in a deadened stare.

 

Chest racked with silent wails, Hitoshi hunched over, cradling his head in his hands. His voice was barely audible as he said, “Go ahead and walk off the roof now, okay? Everything is going to be okay. Everything is going to be okay…”

 

“Okay,” Deku responded.

 

All for One grinned wickedly, uncoiling his fingers from Deku’s neck and taking a step back. Moving mechanically, Deku lifted his foot and fell forward.

 

His consciousness returned less than a second later, as he plummeted toward the ground.

 

Wind screamed in Deku’s ears as fell. His gut lurched, his heart beating so wildly he thought he might have a heart attack before he ever hit the ground.

 

This was a mistake. He didn’t want to do this. He didn’t want to die. He didn’t even want to be the Demon Lord. He wanted to see his mom. He wanted to speak with Kacchan. His hatred still raged inside of him but that something else, the warmth he had felt in the vision, the spark, it was still there…and it was fucking growing.

 

This was a mistake. Maybe it had all been a mistake.

 

And Hitoshi had probably been right, too. Which meant now he was going to die. For real.

 

Deku didn’t believe in god or angels or fairies, but you know who he did believe in? Despite all they had been through and all the hatred and the lies and betrayal, the one person he still believed to be invincible? The hero who really could save everybody?

 

The hero who could save him?

 

“NOT THIS TIME, YOU FUCKING ASSHOLE!!!”

 

Deku gasped as a sticky black tendril wrapped around his midsection, halting him midair.

Notes:

alrighttt fam, i finally got another chapter out! ^^ how do we feel about shinsou? i had to change the tags for him! i actually hadn't originally planned that opening scene, but it just came to me the other day, so i went with it. poor shinsou i feel. he's such a sweetheart villain, i love him so much. he really does deserve better.

also sorry these have been coming so much slower recently. work has been crazy, juggling making content and all the shit im writing, ik those arent the most exciting excuses but life really has been overwhelming and exhausting recently. but i won't give up! i love this story so damn much and i honestly cant wait to write these last few chapters! the next one is one i have been waiting on since i started this fic, im sooo excited about it.

anyway, thank you so much for reading and bearing with me! <333 i really hope you're still enjoying it, even tho its been a lot of angst no comfort recently (there will be comfort to come! just stay with me, we're getting there i swear)

Chapter 20: You Broke Me First

Wind hissed in Deku’s ears as his body was yanked forward. Was this really happening? Kacchan? Here? Stopping his suicide? How? How did he know? Why did he care?

 

A flash erupted in front of Deku, jolting him out of his spiraling thoughts. The heat of the explosion stung his cheeks.

 

“What the fuck…?” Deku whispered as his body was thrust through the fresh hole blown in the side of the abandoned building next to the school.

 

Kacchan got his quirk back? But how? All for One had just taken it back from Deku mere minutes prior. There wasn’t any possible way Kacchan could have coaxed, or more likely forced, All for One to return it to him in the short amount of time Deku had been falling.

 

It didn’t make sense.

 

The floor was hard, dusty concrete littered with debris from the explosion. Deku gasped on impact, breath knocked from his lungs as he tumbled to the far side of the room.

 

He had a million questions he wanted to ask Kacchan. A million more things he wanted to say. But as he came to a stop, lying on his back, gasping for a breath he couldn’t quite catch, all he could manage to choke out was, “Kacchan? What the fuck?”

 

“Me, what the fuck?” Kacchan roared, landing at the mouth of the hole in the wall. “ You , what the fuck?! Why would you do that?!”

 

“I, uh…” It took Deku a moment to gather his senses. On the one hand, he was grateful Kacchan had swooped in to save him. He was pretty sure Hitoshi had been right about All for One, as painful as that realization was. Deku decided to ignore Kacchan’s question altogether, too preoccupied with his own ponderings to focus on his own dire mistake. “Why are you here?”

 

“Jesus fuck Deku. You really have to ask that?” Kacchan stomped toward Deku, kicking up dust around them. “I thought nerds were supposed to be smart! ”

 

A humorless laugh escaped Deku’s throat. “You think I’m the dumb one? The last time I saw you, I basically told you to go fuck yourself.”

 

“Oh, you mean leaking our sex tape to the entire world and trying to ruin my hero career? Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about that,” Kacchan seethed.

 

Blackwhip uncoiled from Deku’s waist and retracted into Kacchan’s forearm. Blackwhip. Deku’s eyes widened in realization. Blackwhip was a former One for All user’s quirk. It was stored there. That must’ve been how Kacchan could still use his quirk. It already lived in One for All.

 

Deku let out a deep breath. For some reason, that fact was really comforting, and he wasn’t quite sure why.

 

His relief was short-lived, however.

 

Kacchan struck a wild smirk, his eyes flaring like firecrackers. “So, are we going to talk about it, or would you rather me just kick your ass instead?”

 

A familiar rage flickered in Deku’s chest. Something about Kacchan’s tone, like the voice of a ghost, an echo of that mantra that had lived rent free in Deku’s brain all these years.

 

Take a swan dive off the roof of the building.

 

Deku let out another dark chuckle. “You know…I’m not him anymore.”

 

Kacchan furrowed his brow. “The fuck are you talking about nerd?”

 

“I’m not him anymore.” Deku repeated, springing to his feet. A sly smile spread across his lips as Kacchan tensed, taking half a step back from the villain. “Poor little Izuku, scribbling his notebooks, not a muscle on his bones and a mind full of pointless observations. I’m not that little kid you could beat up and all I would do was beg for more.”

 

“Oh, you aren’t?” Kacchan growled, tilting his chin and widening his stare like a predator sizing up his prey. “You don’t think I could make you beg?”

 

Deku ticked his jaw, his lip curling in a vicious snarl.

 

“He wasn’t going to bring you back, you know,” Kacchan said. “That walking nutsack was going to let you die and then use your body like a goddamn meat suit.”

 

“Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?” Deku retorted.

 

Kacchan huffed. “The fuck is that supposed to mean?”

 

“You know exactly what it means,” Deku hissed. Fury broiled in his chest, emanating throughout his entire body like white hot electricity crackling in his veins. “You’ve been using my body our entire lives. As a punching bag. As an excuse for your fucked up habits. As a goddamn fleshlight.”

 

Kacchan’s face dropped, his eyes glazed over in feigned nonchalance, but Deku knew him better than that. He knew that Kacchan only looked this disinterested when his own tempest of emotions shook him to his very core.

 

Good. At least Deku wasn’t the only one crumbling from the inside-out.

 

“Shut your fucking mouth,” Kacchan said lowly.

 

“Or what?” Deku bit back. “You’ll fucking kill me? Oh, so heroic, Kacchan. Should we show the world yet another dark side of their beloved number one hero?”

 

“Go ahead and show them,” Kacchan scoffed. “I don’t give a fuck about that right now.”

 

Deku arched his brow, remembering that he couldn’t even do that if he wanted to. All of his quirks were still with All for One, but still. The fact that Kacchan didn’t seem bothered by his bait was…interesting to say the least.

 

If Kacchan didn’t give a fuck about ending his hero career, then what did he care about?

 

“Is that how you knew? Something about our psychic connection with that quirk?” Deku asks, briefly recalling the vision he had with Kacchan and his mother. A pang of pain rippled in his gut, but he decided to ignore it for the time being.

 

“Partially,” Kacchan admitted, his tone finally softening ever so slightly. “That weird blue-haired guy in your dungeon told me about All for One’s plan to leave you dead.”

 

Deku’s lip twitched. What the fuck did that idiot know about anything? He had been locked up in that shithole for years now. How the fuck did he know something Deku had missed?

 

“Shimura?” Deku grumbled. “Even if it was true, why would he tell you that? He fucking hates me.”

 

Kacchan rolled his eyes as though he was bored with this portion of their conversation. “He wanted me to stop you so he could take your place or whatever. I don’t know, the guy really isn’t right in the head.”

 

“You know what? Fuck this,” Deku said.

 

Raw rage flared in his gut, burning up any cushy vulnerability blooming there. Kacchan didn’t know shit. Neither did Hitoshi, or fucking Shimura of all people. Nobody understood his relationship with All for One, and they never would. He was there, the only person who was there, when Deku was at his absolute lowest, splattered on that concrete a decade prior. Kacchan pushed him to it back then, maybe not physically, but with his wicked words, his fists, the fiery daggers of his stare slashing Deku down until he was nothing but bone and hopelessness.

 

All for One was the closest thing to a father Deku had ever had. He wouldn’t raise him and teach him and lead him to this fate, just to kill him off right at the precipice of his greatness. All for One was a lot of things, but he wasn’t a lunatic. Nor an idiot.

 

No. It was all these fuckers that were crazy imbeciles.

 

And now, once again, Kacchan was standing in the way of Deku’s greatness, of him reaching his full potential. Kacchan. Fucking Kacchan.

 

“Fuck you Kacchan!” Deku screamed, slamming his fist into the dusty wall. His knuckles cracked from the pressure, pain shooting through his fist and up his arm. He’d probably broken a few bones in his hand, but he was far too riled up to care. “Fuck Shimura and Hitoshi and every single fucking person on this goddamn fucking planet! All for One is all I have, all I’ve ever had, and all you ever do is fuck everything up! God, I fucking hate you!”

 

Kacchan sucked in a quick breath. Deku heaved, his torso rising and falling with each labored breath. Kacchan’s eyes were wide, no longer glazed with faux nonchalance. His composure was cracked, pain seeping through like a leak in a dam. Any minute it could shatter and flood.

 

Deku struck a sickly smile, delighted by the idea of being the one to finally break the great Bakugou Katsuki.

 

“I was saving you! He wasn’t– I couldn’t–” Kacchan whimpered, yes whimpered. It was like water to Deku’s parched soul, and he drank that shit up.

 

Kacchan’s eyes shimmered. Were those tears? Oh, fucking perfect.

 

Deku sneered smugly, “What, now you're going to cry about it? Cry because I fucking hate you? Good! You know how many tears I’ve shed over you, you fucking bastard? How much pain you’ve caused me? And I’m not talking about the physical pain. Oh no, the beating were nothing compared to—”

 

“I know!” Kacchan shouted, his voice a little stronger than it had been a moment before. “I know I hurt you, and I’m sorry. I’m so goddamn sorry, but I thought we were working through it. I thought we could move on—”

 

“Move on? MOVE ON? You told me to fucking kill myself Kacchan, and I did! How the fuck are we supposed to move on from that?!” He gasped, pain seeping into the fury coursing through his veins. He needed to get out of here, away from Kacchan as quickly as possible. “You really want to save me? Stay the fuck away from me! Seriously. Get the fuck out of here and stay the fuck out of my life. All for One will be here any minute anyway—”

 

“No, he won’t,” Kacchan said evenly, his eyes still wide and wild.

 

Deku bared his teeth. “You underestimate the master.”

 

“You overestimate him,” Kacchan insisted. “My friends are taking care of him, so I can talk some sense into you. Why are you so obsessed with him, anyway? He’s manipulating you! He’s fucking evil Deku, and he’s turned you into a monster—”

 

“He’s all that I have!” Deku screamed, his cheeks stinging with emotion. He really didn’t want to cry right now, but his vision blurred anyway. “He didn’t turn me into shit. I am a monster! He saw me when nobody else could, when everybody just saw a weak, quirkless, delusional kid. When you saw me as an insect to be smashed and walked over—”

 

Kacchan scoffed. “I never saw you that way—”

 

“Really, you’re going to try and deny it?” Deku seethed.

 

It was Kacchan’s turn to punch the wall, but his hit blew a hole straight through. Orange electricity crackled along his skin, igniting around his eyes like a firestorm. “Don’t tell me how I fucking felt! You have no idea—”

 

“WHERE WERE YOU, KACCHAN?” Deku shrieked, giving up on the idea of having any sort of control over his unruly emotions. Tears streaked down his cheeks, and his voice trembled as he continued, “Where were you when I fucking needed you?! When I was hurting? When I was broken and bruised and weeping? WHERE WERE YOU?! STANDING OVER ME, FUCKING LAUGHING!”

 

“I admit, I was a dick, but I was a fucking kid, Deku!” Kacchan said, his own voice cracking.

 

“YOU FUCKING ABANDONED ME, KACCHAN!” Deku shouted. His knees wobbled as though they may give out from under him, but Deku couldn’t care less. He met those inflamed rubies with his icy emeralds and screamed through Kacchan’s very soul. “AND YOU JUST LET ME FALL, LIKE YOU DIDN’T CARE, LIKE IT’S WHAT YOU FUCKING WANTED! SO DON’T YOU DARE ACT LIKE YOU GIVE A SHIT NOW! DON’T YOU DARE—”

 

“I DO FUCKING CARE!” Kacchan raged, ripping his hand through his spiky blonde hair now slick with sweat.

 

The sweet scent of Kacchan’s sweat wafted over to Deku and soured in his nostrils. He hated everything about Kacchan. His gorgeous eyes, his perfectly toned body, the sunkissed glow of his hair, every fucking thing about him sickened Deku in that moment.

 

And for the first time in his life, Deku actually considered tearing Kacchan’s heart from his chest and eating it like any other slab of useless meat.

 

But instead of giving in to his intrusive desire, Deku simply screamed back, “NO, YOU FUCKING DON’T!”

 

“DON’T TELL ME HOW I FUCKING FEEL—”

 

“WHY THEN?!” Deku roared. “Why do you suddenly care now?! CAUSE YOU FEEL FUCKING GUILTY?!”

 

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” As the words left Kacchan’s lips, his muscles loosened, as though he had just dropped an enormous weight strapped to his back. It wasn’t the first time he had spoken these words to Deku, but it still looked like it was a burden he had been holding onto.

 

Kacchan loved him? No, that wasn’t right. Something inside Deku told him it was a lie. Kacchan didn’t love him. He couldn’t. It was just another manipulation. It had to be. He said All for One was manipulating him, but Kacchan had always been his greatest abuser.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kacchan said, his voice coming out in a cracked sob. “I love you, I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I know you don’t, but I do—”

 

“Fuck you…” Deku whispered, shaking his head. Something cracked inside his chest, and he couldn’t keep the tears from coming on even stronger than before. How dare he? How dare Kacchan say that shit just to fuck with his mind?

 

Deku heaved, but his breath caught in his throat as it looked like something broke inside Kacchan, too. Fat tears filled those gorgeous eyes, too many for him to contain, a pair of crimson fires swimming in pools of pain. They spilled over, running down his cheeks as he choked on a sob.

 

“I’m sorry,” Kacchan whispered. “God, Izuku. I love you so much. I’ve always loved you. Even back then when I was so horrible to you. I was a piece of shit, and I didn’t know how to deal with my emotions. I’m so fucking sorry.”

 

Each word hit Deku like a bullet. Anguish spilled from his heart, infecting his bloodstream until it filled every part of him. What a fucking asshole. He was sorry? After everything—the torment, the ridicule, the look in his fucking eyes as he watched Deku fall to his death, after he’d pushed him off that ledge with his hateful words? Breaking all his bones, hell even dying, didn’t hurt nearly as badly as hearing those fucking words because they were all Deku had ever wanted, and now it was too late. Too much time had passed, too much had happened to Deku since the time he needed to hear those words, too much he couldn’t come back from. They couldn’t save him anymore.

 

Kacchan couldn’t save him anymore. Could he?

 

“Fuck you, you fucking bastard!” Deku shouted, lunging toward the weeping man. He wanted to kill him, to wrap his hands around his neck and squeeze the life from him, just like he’d done to Deku so many times before, but…

 

Those eyes, so full of pain and sorrow and longing, those damned fucking eyes stopped him in his tracks. Kacchan meant it. God, he meant it, and that realization just made Deku cry harder. This wasn’t just some guilt-ridden ploy. He could see through Kacchan’s into his soul, and his soul was fucking wailing. He wanted to comfort him, to hold him and run his fingers through those spiky blonde locks until he fell asleep.

 

“Fuck you, Kacchan…” Before he had a chance to think better of it, Deku grabbed the neckline of Kacchan’s hero costume and pulled him close, planting a salty kiss on his trembling lips.

Notes:

Ahh sorry this chapter is kind of a mess. The clashing of emotions and Deku's brainwashing, it's a bit of a clusterfuck but at least we are making some headway. I really hope you guys are still enjoying it! Looking forward to the next couple of chapters. We are getting really close to the end here! Thank you so much for reading and sticking with me through this wild ride ^^ <333