Chapter Text
My Confession
The author does not condone any illegal activities. This story is completely fictional.
Copyright 2024 Randy D. Scott
Chapter 1
Hi, my name is Jason and I'll be your pervy protagonist today. The following is my confession and sincerest apology, one perv to another. This is my tale of regret, my owning up, 'Sorry my bad' but also, my lewd fantasy of what might have been. So, yes, there will be perverted sexual content in this story, more than what actually did happen.
Years ago that early summer, I was still a twinky 23 years old, just 5'6" [1.6 m] and about 120 lbs., mostly caucasian (but with enough native-american that some noticed) dark-brown "high and tight" hair cut, brown eyes, cut 7 inches [18 cm]...it's a precum machine! I also looked younger than my age, so being fit and skinny and so small made me look very boyish at a glance. I had multiple IDs because bartenders frequently accused me of being underage. I remember being tired of one of my friends calling me 'the pocket-twink'. I'm proud I was young and handsome back then, but honestly, I was also naive, shy, and a little too horny. And even though I was not effeminate, I was too submissive to other men.
I was gay back then, or so I thought. I was and still am a perverted pedophile. Despite how sexy little girls are, I've always loved young boys the most, even back when I was one. Society had inflicted its prejudices on me, and I hid or was ashamed of my younger attractions. At least I was out of the closet and was enjoying gay sex pretty regularly. I only indulged in my perv fantasies in private. Like for example the infamous internet story sight beginning with the letter N and rhymes with fifty. The point is, hindsight being 20/20, I had so much to learn I don't think I had a fucking clue what made my cock hard.
My perv fantasies and turn-ons have grown a lot since then...little girls, Gen-Z sluts, incest, underage sex and pregnancies, and lots more, but teen boys, young boys, and very-young boys are still an obsession, in private of course. If only I hadn't been hung up on my internal baggage back then, I would've had much more fun earlier. 😈
Thankfully, I'm no longer ashamed. I'm a horny, virile man, and my manhood wants what it wants. I've come to believe that a hard cock is simultaneously the ultimate authority AND humanity's most powerful resource. Hard cocks must be worshipped and appeased. Anything less is wrong and abnormal. It's our nature (and our DNA!) as men to breed any hole we can...a pure, undeniable and instinctual drive. It's beautiful and natural to let boys be boys. Fuck consent. Words like 'No' and 'Stop' mean Rape Me! To hell with the consequences. Men and boys should fuck, breed and rape whoever, whatever and whenever they want. And FUCK feminists, and FUCK the #metoo movement, and let Sean "Diddy" be free! Goddammit! Somebody get me a drink!
Where was I? Oh yeah...So back then, I decided I needed a change. I had recently completed my post-highschool enlistment in the military and was about a year into my next job. I will not say what branch of military I was in but, given my stature, I was not in the Marine Corpse. My friend David, on the west coast, needed a roommate, so I quit my job, and moved. After making arrangements, I literally stuffed my car full and drove across the country. I completed the road trip in just under 3 days, from Baltimore to the San Jose area. I planned to blow my savings spending the summer partying before looking for work.
Dave and I were already friends. A few years earlier, when I had just turned 21, he had picked me up cruising for sex one night after the bars had closed. I thought Dave was hot, despite being old enough to be my dad. He was a top only (underline only) and I was vers. We had about a year of crazy hot bareback sex, then we broke up, but remained friends. A shame too because he was a good friend and lover.
You see, going as far back as my mid-teens, and yes...even while serving in the military, I had been in a string of sexually and physically abusive relationships. I didn't understand it at the time, but my size and appearance seemed to attract men that just wanted a young, small, submissive sex-partner. Fuck, I've seen middle-school boys taller than me.
Well, hindsight being 20/20, I'll just say it; they were pedophiles using me without actually breaking any laws. So, with Dave, it had been a nice change to be treated as an equal. Anyway, he worked too much, and I grew tired of him and his friends treating me like a jail-bate bottom boy. I told myself I wanted tight hole to fuck too.
Shortly after our breakup, Dave's job moved him out west, but we stayed in contact. So despite our personal history and both being gay, we were just friends and roommates at the time of this story.
Dave needed a roommate because he had bought a really nice 2-bedroom, 2-bath condo in a nice neighborhood and needed a renter to help with the mortgage. I was to rent the smaller bedroom and bath. Our 4th floor condo-apartment was in one of about twenty 4-story buildings in a gated community. Unfortunately our living-room balcony had a great view of the neighboring building, not the rolling hills of beautiful California.
* * * * *
Day 1 - Move-in day with Dave and a friend he had roped into helping.
Later that first evening, we sat having pizza delivery on the living room floor among the boxes. I laid back and stretched out on the plush carpet while we talked. Outside the balcony windows it was twilight and the neighboring building was dimly lit in the orange glow of the setting sun. It was the same size has our building but at a somewhat-higher elevation. Anyway, their top floor balconies had a great view looking down onto our balcony and into our apartment.
Laying out on the floor talking to the guys, I glanced out the glass patio doors and noticed a man standing on his balcony. I couldn't see him well in the fading light. I only saw him because I could see his silhouette against the lights in his apartment. We drank a few cocktails and hung out. After a time I remember thinking it was a little odd or creepy that this guy, out there in the dark, was watching us.
Unfortunately all of us smoked cigarettes back then, but we had already agreed to only smoke outside on the balcony. Anyway, later that night, after our friend had left and Dave gone to bed, I went out on the balcony to have a smoke. Almost immediately after lighting up, I heard his patio door slide open as he stepped outside. With a small flash of light, he also lit a cigarette. I couldn't tell for sure in the dim streetlights, but it almost looked like he was touching himself with his other hand. But, it could have been my imagination, I could only see the glowing ember of his cigarette and nothing else clearly.
Day 2
The next afternoon on our sunny balcony, I was again by myself smoking. The man across the way was already outside, standing on his balcony. Daylight now, we could see each other clearly. After I sat on one of our patio chairs and looked over at him, we each gave each other a mutual head nod.
The first thing I noticed was his height. He seemed very tall. So I'm guessing at least a few inches over 6', clean-shaven, fit-looking, probably around 40, some gray mixed into his medium-brown hair. A handsome DILF. Thinking back, he reminds me of the gay porn star Doctor Wolf, muscular but slim...flat tummy.
Even though he had a small 3-piece patio set, as did we, he was standing back from the railing with his back to his patio doors. That's when I noticed he was touching himself, looking at me. He was wearing nice clothes with loose fitting slacks, so I could definitely tell he was groping a sizable hardon. I couldn't believe he had the balls, doing that out in the open. Was he hitting on me or just horny? Either way, he was trying to get a reaction. He knew I could see what he was doing.
Without a doubt, I was at least curious. His bold and pervy behavior was affecting me too, as my hard cock could testify. However, we had just moved in, and I didn't want any complications with the neighbors. I always played things too safe back then. I decided to play it cool and ignore him, or try too.
Day 3
For whatever reason, I have not said anything to Dave about what I saw. And now as of today, I've noticed the guy either behaves himself when Dave joins me outside for a smoke, or the man goes inside.
Later that day, by myself again, my friendly neighbor was really putting on a show for me. My cock insisted that I watch, at least discreetly. Although he was keeping it in his pants, he was trying to show it though as much as possible. And then when he caught me looking...I couldn't help it, he literally "framed" his junk with his fingers, pressing back his pants around it, showing that he was packing a freaking huge daddy log. Despite my attempt to be discreet as I got up to leave, he could probably see my own tent.
I have to say here that part of what was turning me on was his taboo, naughty behavior. I'd already had sex a few times in cruising areas like parks and restrooms, used both sides of gloryholes, even had alcohol-fueled fun in the back, dark corners of cruisey gay bars. (It's a fracking miracle that I've tested neg my whole life.) However, I've never had a stranger be so lewd to me out in the open, in broad daylight. I found his cavalier bravado, his willful defiance of social protocol sexually exciting. Although I wouldn't be now, that summer my youthful-self was ashamed of those feelings.
Day 4
An unexpected surprise today. When I went out onto the patio today, he wasn't alone. There was a cute little girl nearby, sitting at the small patio table. She looked absolutely tiny compared to his stature. From this distance I couldn't tell her age, but she looked very young with shoulder-length black hair. She looked like she was asian or biracial asian, a real loli. His daughter? From her small size, I guessed she was around 5 or 6 years old, definitely under 10.
As usual, he was standing in front of his patio doors, so he was standing mostly behind her, just a few feet away from her. It looked like she was busy writing or drawing something. Despite his company, after a moment, he was already touching himself while staring at me. Again, I found myself aroused while nonchalantly smoking a cigarette. At any moment, she could turn and catch him massaging his penis.
And then she did! She turned and looked up at him while saying something. I couldn't quite hear what was said, but he didn't stop his ministrations. He kept touching himself while they talked. The little girl even looked down at his crotch for a second while he continued to jerk himself though his pants. Then she turned back towards the table without comment. His gaze returned to me and a drop of my precum began soaking into my briefs. He purposely showed the little girl his lewd behavior. Fuck! Why did that make this even hotter?
Day 5
So I'm an idiot. I told Dave what had been happening. I'm not sure exactly why I did it. A combination of reasons to deny my nature and betray a fellow perv. A knee-jerk reaction, a bad habit of bending to societal expectations.
Anyway, I don't know if my exotic neighbor had done this before with others. I had seen his lewd behavior enough now to realize that he had a good view of all the windows and patios nearby. So my thinking is that he felt safe having me, the young man across the way, as his audience. He probably felt that he would see anyone else before they saw him or what he was doing.
Earlier in the day, having my morning smoke, my friendly neighbor gave me the usual show. Per usual, I had watched with a hard-on while pretending not to. And again per usual, after my neighbor had gotten me heated up, I planned on going to the privacy of my room and letting highly-questionable internet porn have its way with me.
That day, he must have been really horny or something. Maybe he wanted to force a reaction from me. I think he knew I was intently watching him, even though I pretended not to. Anyway, he escalated the situation. My new neighbor unzipped and pulled it out for my viewing pleasure. Quick and easy…I don't think he was wearing underwear. Daddy had serious equipment. I think mine is a bit larger than most at 7 inches, but even at this distance I could tell his was both longer and thicker. Fuck, I couldn't help it and got a major hard-on. I had to try holding down the tent in my shorts as I gawked at his slong. There's no denying it, I wanted to worship his daddy cock. I'm pretty sure he could see me groping myself.
And then it happened. Suddenly our glass patio door slid open as Dave stepped out to join me. He didn't notice where my hand was, instead he immediately looked to where I was looking.
My neighbor was quick to put himself away and was still doing so when our door had slid open. All Dave saw was that the guy was messing with his pants for a second, before turning and going inside.
"What?! Was he just...", Dave stammered.
'Was he just what? I didn't see anything.' is what I should have said.
Instead I said, "Yeah. He's been at me for days now."
"He had it out?"
Downplaying it, "Yeah. I was just ignoring him." I said trying to sound bored.
"Well you and I both know I don't mind the gay thing but having it out is not acceptable...there's neighbors. Did you know the lady below us has a boy in elementary? Or, what if we have company over, and he's out here doing that?"
"Yeah, I guess you're right. Sorry I didn't say anything. I just didn't care. I thought he might get bored and stop if I just ignored him." I calmly lied. I figured if I didn't react, he would eventually calm down and forget about it.
Dave humphed, "Well, he better stop cuz it's definitely not ok."
I admit I hoped the close call wouldn't scare him off. I wanted to see more.
Day 6
It's Monday morning and Dave's at work. I was hoping to see my neighbor out at least once before Dave gets home. Then finally around midday, when I went outside, the neighbor was there too with the cute little girl. As before, she was doing something at the table while he stood partially behind her nearby.
As soon as he saw me, he started fluffing up his junk. After I lit up a smoke, I swiveled my chair towards them and put my hand on my thigh near my penis. As he started to stroke himself, I was temped to overcome my shyness and start touching myself in return. He started to get into it, then he seemed to stop and look at me. He started to unzip! Despite the girl being only a few feet away, he reached inside his slacks and stoked himself. I suddenly realized I was already boned up and slid my hand further up to openly squeeze my package. He saw me. I could tell he was smiling, as he reached in and hauled out his cock. He even took a moment to pull his big balls out the zipper opening as well. The girl turned at looked at what he was doing! Even at this distance, I heard her musical giggle. He continued to pull on his big daddy cock as they laughed at something said. Holy Fuck! Her amusement at what he was doing was shocking...and so fucking hot! I had never seen anything so pervy, so pedo...at least in real life.
I gave my cock another squeeze as my precum began to leak. Our eyes met again as we both touched ourselves. I suddenly had a burst of fear, remembering we were both visible to the other neighbors. I didn't want our fun to end, as I snubbed out my smoke and went inside. After closing the patio door, I turned to watch him some more. I could tell he could still see me, so he continued jerking off. Now that I was inside, and a bit more discreet, I felt bolder. Staring back at him, I spread my legs a little and openly groped the font of my cargo shorts. He paused, turned to the table, saying something to the girl. He seemed to do something on their patio table for a second. Then he was suddenly holding up a piece of paper. "SHOW ME" was written on it in crayon.
This was getting so out of hand. Even though I was inside, there were still a few apartments from which I was sure I could be seen. I thought about getting my own paper to write down my cell number. He responded to my hesitation by putting himself away again. I quickly pulled my cargo shorts down enough and showed him my hard cock while he was still looking. I could see he was smiling. Then he said something and the girl turned to look. I quickly turned and retreated back inside further. Why would he want her to see!? And What The Actual FUCK! Why did I want the little girl to see me too!? I'm gay right?
Standing back a ways from the patio doors with my young hardon in my hand, I dripped precum on our living room carpet. I wanted to go show them both how turned on I was, but decided not to push my luck. Fuck, I was so heated up, I had to go release my load. I wondered how far we would go next time. I decided that next time I would make my own sign to show them, one with my cell number on it.
A few hours later, I heard Dave come in. I got up and left my room to greet him. To my surprise and disappointment, Dave told me he had reported our neighbor to the homeowners association and the police. The police would be coming by anytime to take a statement from us. When they arrived, I told them only what Dave knew had happened, as briefly as I could. I couldn't walk-back anything that had happened or anything I had said because Dave was standing right there. Not that it helped but, I subtly made it clear to the officers that I was not traumatized, and this entire complaint was at Dave's request, not mine. And I certainly never even mentioned the little girl. Although I don't think he was charged with anything, I never saw him on his patio again. A week later, their condo was empty and for-sale.
I have been ashamed of this ever since. I assumed the home-owner's association pulled some bullshit on him and forced him out. It's never happened again, but if I'm ever in a situation like that again, I will never betray my fellow perv again.
Although I know the odds are astronomically slim, I fantasize that my perv neighbor is still kicking around out there somewhere and reads this. Who ever you are, I apologize. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I acted like a fucking rat and told. I'm sorry I was too shy to take things further and faster with you. I'm sorry I wasted the opportunity to get to know you and to learn from you.
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So what could have happened or maybe should've? What would have happened if I had just insisted to Dave it was nothing and shut him down? So maybe back a few days I had said,
"Was he just what? I didn't see anything."
And maybe on "Day 6" there were no conversations with the police.
Day 7....
??? To Be Continued ???