The Silence

by blondejellykitty

Summary:

Nineteen months in the wilderness.

Leah Hoffmann and the other survivors scavenged, starved and prayed before they were finally rescued. But that was merely the official story. Leah and those who survived the harsh winters and tense summers knew what truly happened out there. The wilderness was a harsh, cruel place filled with harsh and cruel teenagers.

Chapter 1: CASTING

 

CASTING

 

 

 

FREYA ALLAN [AS] LEAH HOFFMANN

 

 

Seventeen | The Silent

 

 

 

 

KEVIN ALVES [AS] TRAVIS MARTINEZ

 

 

Sixteen | The Hunter

 

 

 

 

SOPHIE THATCHER [AS] NATALIE SCATORCCIO

 

 

Seventeen | The Queen

 

 

 

 

SOFIA BRYANT [AS] TESSA WRIGHT

 

 

Seventeen | The Friend

 

 

 

 

ALEXANDRA BORTICH [AS] JULIA BROWN

 

 

Seventeen | The Bully

 

 

 

 

TOM GLYNN-CARNEY [AS] RICKY NELSON

 

 

Seventeen | The Crush

 

 

 

 

GARRETT HEDLUND [AS] BOBBY FARLEIGH

 

 

Eighteen | The Bully

 

 

 

 

REST OF CAST AS ON TV

 

 

Taissa Turner | The Skeptic

Vanessa Palmer | The Decider

Misty Quigley | The Outcast

Shauna Shipman | The Butcher

Lottie Matthews | The Prophet

Mari Ibarra | The Mystery

Jackie Taylor | The Leader

Laura Lee | The Faithful

Javi Martinez | The Sacrifice

 

 

 

Chapter 2: ACT ONE

 

'SEASON ONE'

 

 

 

Nobody - Mitski

 

And I don't want your pity, I just want somebody near me

Give me one good movie kiss and I'll be alright

 

 

 

idontwannabeyouanymore - Billie Eilish

 

Was I made from a broken mold?

I don't wanna be you, I don't wanna be you, anymore

 

 

 

Running up that hill - Kate Bush

 

Is there so much hate for the ones we love?

Oh, tell me, we both matter, don't we?

 

 

 

 

 

Overwhelmed - Royal & The Serpent

 

My anxiety keeps me silent when I try to speak

Oh I should be fine but it's all too much, I should be fine but I'm not

 

 

 

Runaway - AURORA

 

I've been putting sorrow on the farthest place on my shelf

Nobody knows, nobody knows

 

 

 

The 30th - Billie Eilish

 

What if it happened to you on a different day? What if you weren't alone?

I remember you said you were scared, and so was I

 

 

 

 

 

Softcore - The Neighbourhood

 

I'm too consumed with my own life, doin what I can tryna be a man

Watching my youth slip away, sharing my heart it's tearing me apart

 

 

 

Cigarette Daydreams - Cage The Elephant

 

As I recall you were looking out of place, so sweet with a mean streak

If we can find a reason, a reason to change

 

 

 

Twin Size Mattress - The Front Bottoms

 

For the friends I've made, for the sleepless nights

The lessons to be learned, consequences for all the stupid shit I say

 

 

Chapter 3: And The Yellowjackets Score!

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah Hoffmann could do a lot of things. Like play the guitar, understand advanced algebra or be one hell of a soccer player. But one thing she couldn’t do was hold, start or fully contribute to a conversation. 

When she was six she vividly remembered being scolded by the teachers for not participating in answering any questions on the colourful whiteboard. She remembered the other kids pulling her hair and giving her mean glares from the playground all because she wouldn’t talk to them. It wasn’t until her parents had taken her to a large hospital to be repeatedly questioned by some doctor, that she’d been subjected to several tests to find out the reason for her continuous silence. 

It was a few months later she was officially diagnosed with selective mutism. Her mother had been beyond distraught, asking a million questions to the poor psychologist while her father just sat there watching. When they’d gotten back home, Leah had ran off to play with the family dog, named Sandy. Sandy made up for the fact that she didn’t have any friends at school, she was the most loyal and energetic friend Leah could ever ask for. The sight of the pair seemed to ease her father’s worries unbeknownst to her. He was glad that she could still be a somewhat normal kid. Her mother on the other hand had her face permanently fixed to a scowl in Leah's direction from that day on.

Her mother made it clear how disappointed she was in Leah. Harsh glares and snarky comments were usual in her life from then on. Eventually Leah learned to brush it off, or to at least look like she did. Even after all the years, it still seemed to get under her skin.

“I just don’t know why they let you on the team.” Her mothers sigh rang out over the kitchen bench, she lightly shook her head as she spoke making her heated curls bounce around her face.

‘I’m mute, not paralyzed…’

Leah kept her face as neutral as possible, she wouldn’t let her mother win and increase her curfew. Again.

“Probably a charity case, high school teams always seem to have one of those” Her mother shrugged as she spoke and finished buttering the toast.

‘…Bitch.’

Leah had learned early into her childhood to keep a poker face. On time she’d rolled her eyes at one of her mothers comments and she’d been banned from dinner for a week. Her father hadn’t noticed, of course, he was always too busy at work. He tries to be there, she tells herself. But it didn’t make it any easier. Her mother placed a floral plate with toast on it in front of her and stood with her hands on her hips, waiting. Leah picked up her pocket notebook. 

Thank you

Her mother scoffed and walked back into the kitchen. Leah ate her peanut butter toast and listened to the music from the radio that sat above the oven on the carved wooden shelf. As she finished her first slice, a car horn interrupted the relatively quiet morning.

‘She’s always early’

Leah stood up quickly and grabbed her backpack, slinging it over her shoulder. Leah quickly scribbled into her notebook and ripped it out placing it onto the bench.

I’ll be home late - last soccer match for nationals

“If you’re late home, you can get your own dinner” Her mom picked up Leah's half finished plate, Leah quickly grabbed the last slice of toast from it and waved goodbye as she ran off towards her waiting ride to school.

Sitting outside was a pristine blue car. Inside sat Tessa Wright waving at her to hurry up. Tessa Wright was Leah’s best and only friend. They’d met in middle school when Julia Brown started bullying Leah. It didn’t matter that Leah was mute, that douchebag would’ve found anything to be cruel to her about. But Tessa had stood up to Julia, to the point of getting detention for punching her. From the day on the two of them were practically inseparable.

“Get in, get in!” Tessa’s muffled voice squealed out. 

Leah dropped her bag onto the clean floor and shut the car door behind her. She stuffed the rest of the toast in her mouth, wiping the crumps onto the floor as they pulled out of her street.

“Urgh seriously? My floor!” Tessa groaned and hit her head back on the headrest.

Good morning and you’re welcome :)

Leah held it out in front of her knuckles clutching onto the steering wheel. Tessa’s brown eyes flickered down to the paper then back up at the road.

“Morning” She grumbled glancing to the floor, while Leah smiled innocently at her.

“Are you excited or nervous for the final match today?” She teased while indicating left.

EXCITED!!

Leah sprawled out across the whole page. Tessa laughed and shook her head.

“Oh obviously.” She rolled her eyes playfully. “You know I hate soccer but I think the team will win this. I think you can win this whole fucking thing actually” Her voice held genuine sincerity which struck Leah’s heart.

Really?

“Hell yeah! And I'll be there at the match today, won’t go to nationals though. No offense but me and flying have a no-go policy.” She shuddered at the thought.  Tessa had a huge fear of flying. Her mom likes to watch all those disaster revealed tv-shows and it scared her big time. Leah’s shoulders shake with silent laughter.

If we do go to nationals - you have to tell me all the answers to the SATs

“Is that all I am? Your test answers?” Tessa bantered with a raised eyebrow.

Yes. Obviously.

“Oh, okay. You know what get out of my car” Leah shook her head dramatically and Tessa’s giggling rang through the car enough for the both of them. After an extra circle around the block to listen to another song, they pulled into a parking space outside school. Leah flipped to the next page in her notebook.

I’ll see you at lunch?

“Not today, ugh, I have to re-do my physics essay before last period” Tessa groaned, letting her head fall on the top of the steering wheel.

You didn’t finish it yet?

“Well, my class is a week ahead yours, so no” Tessa had the decency to look sheepish, Leah rolled her eyes with a knowing smile.

Goodluck then - See you at the match?

“You bet, I wouldn't miss it” She winked at Leah as they both got out of the car.  The pair waved goodbye to each other as they walked to opposite sides of the school.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah stopped running abruptly, her lungs heaved as she fought to breathe more air. She stood in the middle of the soccer field staring in awe at Jackie Taylor who’d just scored them the last point they needed to win nationals. Shauna went running up to Jackie, pulling her into a tight hug.  One by one the rest of the team followed suit, loud squeals echoed from the field. Leah smiled so wide her cheeks hurt as she felt Van Palmer run up behind her, her hands thumping against Leah’s shoulders. They both ran towards the rest of the team.

The team of girls gathered around hugging each other. The group began jumping and screaming out their team catchphrase. “Buzz, Buzz, Buzz, Buzz!” The rest of the team chanted. Leah smiled wide and jumped in sync with them.

“We’re going to nationals!” Someone screamed out over the loud ‘Buzz’ shouting. Leah turned her head away from the group to look out at the crowd. Tessa stood clapping and yelling happily. She waved excitedly at her before she was pulled back into the group celebration.

‘Holy shit, we’re actually going to nationals!’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The radio blasted loudly through the car as they drove down the main road. Tessa was hitting the steering wheel in tune with the bass guitar and was humming just loud enough to hear.

“I can’t believe your going to nationals- I mean I can believe it, but still it’s fucking nationals!” Tessa spoke as the song faded into its outro. Leah nodded and pulled out her notepad from her jacket pocket.

I feel like I’m dreaming! 

Tessa leaned over and pinched her left arm. Leah scrunched her face and rubbed her upper arm.

Ow. Rude

“There, you're not dreaming. But seriously, this is amazing for you!” Tessa beamed and Leah's face blushed red.

Yeah yeah, Thanks.

“Pfsh, you're welcome.” She laughed and the next song started to play. Leah smiled as she looked out the window seeing everything rush by.  They pulled up at her driveway far too soon for Leah’s liking, she was enjoying the song on the radio.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Tessa smiled at her.

You know it!

Tessa leaned over and hugged her. Leah waved to her as she drove away. Leah quickly walked inside, going straight into the dining room where her dad sat at the table. She pulled out her notepad and walked over to him.

Guess who’s going to nationals!

Leah had to place the notepad down because she was shaking with excitement. 

“Oh my god” Her mother waved her arm up in despair and stormed off into the next room. Leah’s smile was so wide it hurt.

“My god is right. This is fantastic, sweetheart!” Her father looked up at her from his seat at the kitchen table. He smiled up at her, sharing her enthusiasm. She’d never seen him so proud before.  She jumped up and down in place, closing her eyes as she danced around. Her fathers laughter echoed in the quiet room. 

“Now-” Her father began and she quickly turned at the sound of his serious tone. “If you’re going to nationals…” He paused and she held her breath in suspense.

‘Please let me go, please, please, please.’

“You’ve got to win gold!” He broke his serious facade and cackled at her surprised face. She nodded fervently and jokingly saluted him.

‘I’m going to nationals!’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“-See what I want, slip slide to it swifty” The muffled lyrics broke into fits of laughter from across the locker room. Leah leaned over the sink to look into the mirror as Van finished off the bumblebee face paint on her left cheek. Jackie was helping Allie Dickson with her face painted bee next to her.

“Allie, you alright? It’s just a pep rally. Honestly I think the whole point is just to give the freshmen something to jerk off to later.” Jackie softly laughed at the end, and her voice was so comforting even Leah felt eased by her words.

“Jackie. Coach wants to see you in his office” Lottie Matthews walked in, her hair and face paint finished. Allie turned back around to face Jackie. “I’m not nervous” Jackie smiled at her and walked off towards Coach’s office. Van swapped places with Jackie and finished off the small bee on Allie’s face.

“I’m the only freshman who got asked, you know.” Allie’s voice lightly shook with emotion. “I know” Van said sympathetically. “It’s so unfair” She whined and Van smiled slightly at her. 

Leah glanced over at Lottie who was trying her hardest not to smirk at the younger girls' dramatics. “My dress was gonna be amazing” Leah had to look away from Lottie or else they’d both start laughing.

“Well, hey, at least you can wear it next year.” Van was so much better than Leah was, even if she could talk there was no way in hell she’d been able to keep a straight face. “You don’t get it, Van, ‘cause nobody asked you” She snarled out.

‘Oh, Allie, did your mother never teach you manners’

“Okay, you’re done” Van said plainly. Allie turned and looked over Leah’s shoulder to the mirror with a smile and walked off like nothing had even happened. Tai Turner walked in after her quietly observing what happened. They all waited a second before both Leah and Van laughed silently. 

“Jesus Christ” Lottie rolled her eyes with a wide smirk while Van snorted at it all.  Leah pulled out her notepad from her gym shorts quickly jotting her thoughts down and flipping it around to face both of them.

I know we’re going to nationals but what about prom? :(

Both Lottie and Van chuckled as they read it. “Right? Like does someone want to tell Kelly Kapowski to maybe worry less about prom and more about not fucking up nationals?” Lottie said as she fixed her bangs in the mirror.

“Oh, come on” Van muttered. Leah leaned against the yellow wall behind them watching as Tai fixed her hair, while Van pretended to have a ginger mustache.

“If she plays like she did at states…” Lottie argued but was interrupted. “Yeah, don’t worry. That’s not gonna happen.” Tai stood back up and crossed her arms with an assuring smile before walking back off.

Hopefully not.

Leah lazily wrote and held it up to Van and Lottie with a shrug before walking off too. She didn’t know what Tai had planned but she really did hope it was going to work. Allie really really sucked at soccer, and Leah really wanted to win nationals.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Vice Principal Berzonsky’s voice was muffled from where they stood waiting to enter the gym for the pep rally. Leah fiddled with the gold ring on her right hand, she always did when she was nervous. Someone placed their hand over hers, to stop her fidgeting. Leah looked up from where she was staring at her shoes. Shauna Shipman stood giving her a kind smile.

“You okay?” She whispered, Leah wobbly smiled back and nodded at her. 

“Now, our next act needs no introduction. So let’s all make some noise for your New Jersey State-” Berzonsky’s voice was drowned out by the cheering. “Girl’s Soccer Champions!” That was their cue… They all ran out in a line, the cheering was almost overwhelming. The team stood in a line in front of the crowd, the bee mascot running around hyping them up. Leah looked over to the stands and saw Tessa cheering for them. Leah smiled and clapped with the rest of her team.

For once during these pep rallies, Leah felt herself smile, actually smile. She was glad she’d built up the courage to join the Yellowjackets because now, she truly felt like one.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat on the blue bench watching Natalie Scatorccio, Lottie and Tai arguing amongst each other. “It doesn’t even seem like you care” Tai complained, glancing over at Natalie.

“Are you kidding me?” Natalie scowls and the bell rang across the courtyard. “You’re being insensitive” She continued as Shauna walked up to the small group of Yellowjackets.

“This is what we’ve worked for all season. You really want to take that chance?” Tai argues while looking around each person. “Yeah. ‘Cause I’m not a fucking asshole.” Natalie rebuttals.

“What are you guys talking about?” Shauna questions as she joins the group. Leah quickly pulled out her notebook.

Allie.

But before she could turn it around to face the group Lottie answered. “Allie” Lottie tells Shauna as Tai sighs. Shauna briefly looks down at Leah before moving her gaze towards the rest of the group who continue their conversation, forgetting about Leah.

“What about her?” Shauna asked after peering over to look at Allie from across the courtyard. “Did you black out at states? She totally choked.” Tai shrugged as she talked.

“She’s a freshman, Ty” Natalie defended. “She’s a liability” Tai complained, barely holding back an eye roll.

“So, what do you want to do about it?” Shauna looked puzzled as she asked. Leah quietly placed her notebook back into her pocket and let her eyes bounce from person to person as they spoke. She was used to people forgetting or just not caring about including her, she’d learnt to not take it personally anymore. 

‘Still sucks though. No one likes being ignored’  

“She can’t screw up if she doesn't get the ball” Tai explains her plan.  “You want to freeze her out?” Shauna checks questioningly. “At least we’d know what we’re working with” Tai defended herself.

Leah can’t help but wonder if they ever had this kind of discussion about her when she joined. It left a simmering gnawing pain in her stomach, like she wanted to throw up, cry and punch someone all at once.

“She kind of sucks, but… I don’t know” Lottie chimed in, shaking her head as she spoke. “That’s because it’s bullshit” Natalie seethed with a bitter laugh.

“Oh, yeah? What’s your plan then?” Tai whisper yells out. “I don’t know. Play like a fucking team and win? It’s worked so far” Natalie ranted in frustration.

“Everything works until it doesn’t. And for the record you smell like a wino. Get your shit together.” Tai sneers. “You know what? Fuck this.” Natalie scoffs and walks away angrily.

“Wow. Okay” Tai breathes out and turns back to Lottie and Shauna.  Leah shuffles down the bench quietly and grabs her bag, running after Natalie. Leah sees her turn a corner and catched up to her, tapping her on the shoulder. She jerks back slightly and glares curiously at Leah who pulls out her notepad again.

I think you’re right by the way and what Taissa said wasn’t nice either  

She turned it around for Natalie to read. She nodded slightly once she had. “Right” She said skeptically, Leah only nodded sincerely.

Natalie looked her up and down with narrowed eyes. “I’m not sharing any booze with you” She stated harshly, Leah’s eyes widened and shook her head rapidly which only made Natalie smirk.

“Alright, fine. Let’s go before we’re late to practice.” She nodded her head to the left and the pair began walking towards the locker room together.

“Are you going to the party tonight?” Natalie asked, rolling her head to the side.  Leah’s eyebrows furrowed and she handed her small book over to Natalie after she’d written her answer down.

I didn’t know there was a party. I’ve never been to one before.

“Well that’s fucking tragic. We’ve gotta change that” Natalie smiled at Leah handing her book back and dramatically holding the locker room door open for her. Leah’s shoulders shook with silent laughter while she nodded and walked into the locker room holding the door much less dramatically for Natalie. They kept walking into the room together.

‘Did I seriously just get invited to a party by Natalie fucking Scatorccio? Sweet.’

Chapter 4: Drink Responsibly Kids

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

A loud whistle blew out across the field. Leah, Mari Ibarra and Laura Lee paused their practicing to look over at Coach Scott.

“All right. Bring it in. Take a knee, ladies.” They all gathered around Coach Scott, kneeling in a grouped semi-circle. Misty Quigley stood next to him holding their red pinnies.

“What’s up, state champs?” He whooped and the team cheered and Leah clapped.

“Okay, so JV is gonna help us out with a little scrimmage today. Uh, Coach Martinez had to take care of a family thing, so, JV, you’re gonna grab a pinny from Misty and let’s get started.” Coach Scott was interrupted by Laura Lee.

“Uh, excuse me, Coach Scott. Shouldn’t we say a prayer first?” Laura Lee smiled as she always seemed to before prayer.

“Uh, it’s just a scrimmage, Laura Lee” Coach Scott chuckled but backed down at her soft but determined face. 

“But uh, sure. Yeah knock yourself out.” He cleared his throat and nodded.

“‘Kay” She inhaled deeply and bows her head. Leah and the rest of the team slowly do the same. “Heavenly Father, let our efforts remain fruitful, so that we may perform in ways glorious to you. In your name we pray.” She finished the prayer and clapped with a smile. 

“All right, let’s go” Coach Scott added.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah watched as the ball was passed from Tai over to Natalie. 

“Nat!” Allie yelled and ran into position as Natalie passed the ball over to her, unfortunately the ball ended up in JV’s clutches. Coach blew his whistle.

“Come on, Allie. That should’ve been yours.” He declared. Leah watched from mid-field as Tai ran over to Coach Scott and swapped sides, putting on one of the red pinnies.

“All right! Let’s go, Varsity! Taissa wants to see you step it up. And, quite frankly, that makes two of us. Let’s see some hustle!” He yelled out. 

Jackie looked over the team with confusion, lastly she landed on Leah who only shrugged her shoulders at her. Coach Scott rings his whistle and the scrimmage continues.

Leah runs further in-field and caught sight of Allie getting shoved by Tai. Laura Lee kicked the ball over to Allie who was fighting against Tai to keep it.

“Allie!” Shauna calls out with her hand up.

Allie swerved around Tai, getting free from her opposition she passed the ball over to Shauna. Shauna ran towards the goal but was targeted by the other team’s defenses.

“Shauna!” Allie yelled out and the ball was passed in her direction. 

Allie ran towards it and Tai slid towards the ball, trying to kick it away from her. She falls to the ground with a thud. Tai missed the ball and accidentally hit her shin. Leah watches as Allie rolls and holds her leg to her chest crying out in pain. Everyone stood around looking at her until she started screaming.

Leah saw the blood first. Then she came closer and she saw the injury in full. Leah grimaced and looked away. Her reaction wasn't as bad as the rest of the team. She supposed that made sense, she’d heard all the stories from her father, emergency room doctor, meaning these kinds of things were heard over the dinner table but it didn’t make it pleasant to physically look at. 

Gross. Insides should really say inside…

“Holy fuck” Coach Scott had never looked so green before. 

Leah sat down criss-cross on the grass. She heard Coach Scott yelling and Misty ran off towards the offices. The other girls gathered around trying to calm Allie down. Tai and Jackie stood frozen looking at the scene in front of them.

Well, she definitely won't be going to nationals anymore... At least practice finishes early now…

The locker room was eerily quiet compared to normal. Leah just went about her routine as usual, grabbing her things from her blue locker, despite the weight of the air around her. Jackie got up and walked in front of everyone.

“I know we’re all really worried about Allie. But… it might not be as bad as it looks.” Jackie tried to reassure them but it fell flat.

“You could see her fucking bones, Jackie. I’m pretty sure it’s exactly as bad as it looks.” Natalie chimed in from her seat on the cold floor.

“Oh, god. I’m going to throw up” Van gagged with a distant stare, Leah felt bad but there wasn’t much she could do.

“Okay, but, I mean… We’re still a team. And we still have each other.” Jackie shrugged with a hopeful smile.

“And the Lord works in mysterious ways.” Laura Lee encouraged.

Natalie slammed her locker shut loudly, startling everyone.

“Nice work, Taissa.” She mocked as she stormed off. Tai sighed and placed her head in her hands in dismay.

Leah grabbed her bag and walked out as the rest of the team did. She gave Jackie a sympathetic look as she left.

As she walked through the school grounds she saw Natalie and Kevyn Tan talking before he nodded at something she said and walked off. Natalie heard Leah coming over to her. She turned and rolled her eyes.

“If you’re here to tell me more shit about how we’re supposed to be a team…” She trailed off and Leah tilted her head to the side as she wrote her answer down.

Are you still going to the party?

“Yeah” Natalie scoffed, “Why?”

Can I still come?

Natalie laughed sourly “You don’t need my fucking permission” Leah shrugged before writing her response

You’re the one who invited me?  

“You’ve really never been to a party before, huh?” Natalie said in disbelief, with her eyebrow raised questioningly.

I’m guessing birthday parties don’t count

“Fucking hell” Natalie snorted with laughter and Leah rolled her eyes jokingly. “Okay, I’m taking your party virginity. We’ll go together, yeah? We can swing by and pick up your shit for nationals” Leah looked confused and Nat put her hands on Leah’s shoulders with a smirk.

“‘Cause I have a feeling you’re not gonna hold your liquor.” Leah’s eyes went wide and Nat burst out laughing, almost hitting her head on Leah’s shoulder. 

“Yes Leah, there's going to be alcohol” Nat smiled widely at her naivety, finding it hilarious.

As the pair began walking out of school Leah saw Tessa walking towards her car. She tapped Nat and showed her what she’d written down.

I gotta say goodbye to my friend first 

“Don’t worry Kevyn had to grab his shit before we leave” Nat shrugged and leaned against the school gate. Leah nodded and ran over towards Tessa.

“There you are! I thought you got lost or something” Tessa looked up from her bag, pulling out her keys.

Sorry, didn’t mean to keep you waiting .

“It’s okay. I'm surprisingly used to your lateness” She smirked and Leah stuck her tongue out at her.

Tessa opened her car door but paused when Leah didn’t move. “You coming?” She asked, slightly closing her door. Leah shook her head. 

No, sorry I’m sleeping over a Nat’s tonight.

“Nat? As in Natalie?” Leah nodded with a smile, while Tessa walked back over to her.

“I didn’t know you two were friends” Tessa questioned with a slight pout. Leah shrugged sheepishly.

Yeah - I mean I think we are

“Okay. I guess I'll see you after nationals then” Her smile was pearly like usual but her voice didn’t hold its enthusiasm. Leah didn’t notice as she nodded excitedly.

Totally! I’ll win it for you :) 

Leah’s shoulders shake with faux laughter. Tessa and her shared a goodbye hug and waved each other off as Leah walked back towards Nat who was talking with Kevyn and Tessa got back into her car and drove off.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“See you both in an hour?” Kevyn asked from behind the half-rolled window of his mother’s car. 

“You got it” Nat said without looking back.

Leah took a deep breath as the car drove away. She’d never had anyone over at her house before, not even Tessa. Leah twisted the ring on her finger nervously. Both her and Nat walked towards the wooden front door.

They walked into the living room where her mother was folding laundry. Her mother turned around placing her hand on her hips.

“You’re home early. Who’s this?” Her mother dropped the shirt she was folding back into the basket.

Natalie - She’s a Yellowjacket too. 

Her mother sighed but read the page anyway, her eyebrow twitched as it always did before a snarky remark.

“She’s on the team? I suppose I was right about them letting anyone join” She looked Natalie up and down with a judgmental glare. Leah clenched her jaw in anger.

Can I stay at her place tonight?

“Oh, I don't know, can you? You’re the one with the important flight tomorrow” Her mother waved her hand dismissively “You’re father’s working late again. What do I care? Sure, go stay druggies and the drunks” Her mothers comments made Leah close her eyes, trying to calm herself down. Her mother strutted out the room with one last look at Natalie.

I am so, so sorry

Leah felt it didn’t quite put her guilt into enough words so she underlined it and showed it to Nat.

“I thought my mom was a bitch, but yours is a whole ‘nother level” She scoffed, brushing off the rude comments. Leah only nodded awkwardly and guided Nat up the stairs.

They entered Leah’s room, and Nat looked around the un-personalized room. The only way anyone was able to tell anyone lived in the room was the half-made bed and the messy clothes thrown around the floor which Leah quickly rushed to pick up and clean. Her entire room was void of any decorations.

“This is your room?” Nat asked and Leah shrugged after showing her the written answer.

Yeah - Mom doesn’t like the house to be messy

Nat snickered sourly and flopped on the bed. Leah started packing everything she needed for nationals. Once she’d packed the duffle bag full of things, she moved onto what to wear for the party.

Leah grabbed a dress out of her closet and turned it over for Nat to see as she held it up to her chest in a silent question.

“Is that for Laura Lee’s bible study or the party tonight?” Nat laughed slightly but stopped when she saw Leah’s shoulders drop, clearly upset.

“Okay, let me have a look” Nat got up and swiveled past Leah to look into her closet, before moving over to her dresser. Eventually, she laid out an outfit down on the bed with a smug smile.

Okay fine, you win

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“What am I doing here again?” Kevyn asked and Nat snorted.

‘Couldn't have put it better myself…’

“You guys, my cousin hooked us up” Another one of Nat’s friends ran over. Leah forgot his name and was way too anxious to ask for it again.

“You got it?” Nat asked him with excited eyes.

“Got six words for you my friend. Lucy… in the Sky… with Diamonds.” Leah had no clue what any of that meant but thankfully for her, he held up a small bag of white pills. 

‘Ah. Drugs. Fun.’

Nat wasted no time grabbing it off him, Leah didn’t wait to hear what Kevyn had to say, she left the small group to do their own thing. 

She walked over to a blonde girl handing out drinks. Leah smiled at her and took a red solo cup from her. Leah wandered over to a quieter side of the party, where she wasn’t too close to anyone she didn’t know but could still hear the music. She took a sip from the drink and grimaced at the taste. 

‘How the hell were these people drinking this shit?’

She silently placed the cup down by her feet on the grass. Leah looked out at the party and could only recognize Jackie and Shauna dancing by the fire, she smiled slightly at the sight.

Leah stood there for a while until she heard someone walking over. To her right was a tall blonde guy. He looked vaguely familiar, but Leah didn’t know why.

‘Maybe we shared a class or something?’

“Hey” He said with a smile as he stood next to her.

She responded with a very awkward smile, which he laughed at.

“Not much of a drinker, are you?” He offhandedly pointed to her sadly full cup on the floor. Leah shook her head. 

“Not much of a talker either huh?” He laughed slightly, which she raised an eyebrow at and pulled out her notebook from her back pocket. 

I’m mute. So no, not really.

She turned it around and outstretched her arm for him to see it. 

“Oh, shit. You’re that Hoffmann girl, huh” His eyes widened and he stood up straighter. Leah nodded and waved at him sarcastically.

I’m Leah.

She looked at him expectantly. “Oh, I’m Ricky” She smiled in acknowledgment.

“So, why aren’t you with your friends?” He asked, looking around the party.

They’re getting high - What about your friends?

She silently laughed at his understanding look. He pointed over to a group of guys chugging beers. Leah noticed Shauna glancing at them and looking disgusted. She felt the same. Ricky could tell from her face but he just laughed it off.

She shuddered at the night breeze that rolled in. Ricky immediately shrugged off his varsity jacket and placed it around her shoulders. Leah looked at him in surprise but slowly smiled shyly at him. 

‘Well that was sweet, like a rom-com. Ew. Totally ew.’

Thanks

She wrote down and showed him, having to push the long sleeves up to not drown out the notepad in her hand.

“Don’t mention it” He smirked slightly, looking happy with himself as they both looked out at the moving party.

“You wanna get out of here?” He looked over at her. Leah suddenly became painfully aware of her bright red face, she looked around the party refusing to look over at him. 

“Oh shit, I didn’t me-” He paused and shook his head “I know a place that doesn’t shut for another few hours, it’s got a killer milkshake” He rephrased his prior question. Leah looked over at Ricky skeptically and he held his hand to his heart “Swear, they have the best milkshakes in town.” Leah tried to hide her smile.

Is that all you want?

He rolled his eyes “I guess we could get some fries too” He pretended to say defeatedly. Leah’s shoulders shook with muted laughter and he watched her with a smile. 

Okay - Sounds like fun :) 

“Cool l-” Ricky was cut off by the sound of girls yelling at each other. Leah looked over and face palmed at the sight of Shauna and Tai screaming at each other while the other Yellowjackets tried to stop them.

“Aren't they your friends?” Ricky looked over at her and she sighed, nodding her head slowly.

“That’s it! Enough” Jackie yelled out, pausing the fighting “Yellowjackets, with me! Now!” She waved her hand for them to follow and stormed off. Leah bit her lip nervously.

“Think you have a team meeting” Leah winced and nodded looking apologetically at Ricky who put his hands in his jeans pocket with a carefree shrug. “It’s sweet, we can go after, if you still want to?” Leah smiled widely and nodded enthusiastically before running off to follow the rest of the team.

Leah ran up to the rest of the group as Jackie was speaking. Nat turned to look at her and smiled widely with slightly vacant eyes.

“Alright. Everyone line up. No, I’m fucking serious. Line up! Come on!” Jackie ordered clapping her hands. Slowly they all lined up, Leah slotting next to Nat and Lottie. Lottie turned to look at her and paused at the sight of the obviously guy’s jacket Leah was wearing, thankfully for her Lottie didn’t say anything.

“Here’s what we’re gonna do. I want each of you to go down this line and say one nice, true thing about every other girl on this team.” Jackie explained.

“What is this, fucking Girl Scout camp?” Tai scoffed and Van laughed.

“Who wants to go first?” Jackie ignored the comment.

“I’ll go, Jackie.” Laura Lee lifted her hand and volunteered.

Jackie smiled and Laura Lee walked over to face Tai, holding her crossed arm and smiled.

“Taissa, you are beautiful in the eyes of our Lord” Laura Lee nodded and moved over to Van.

“Van, you are beautiful-” She almost repeated. 

“Oh my god!” Lottie interrupted and Nat laughed wildly.

‘Well, this is fun. Why were they arguing in the first place?’

“Okay, Laura Lee. Fall back” Jackie nervously smiled and swore under her breath.

“Okay. I’ll go first” She shrugged and walked in front of Tai.

“Taissa Turner, you have more fight in you than anyone I’ve ever known. I’m inspired by your determination.” Jackie was so sincere as she spoke.

“Vanessa Palmer. Your smile makes me feel happy every time I see it.” 

“Laura Lee, I truly admire your faith.”

“Nat, I love that you don’t care what anybody thinks. And you’re so completely yourself.-” Jackie was cut off.

“-She’s also deadly a beer pong.” Van chimes in.

“So, go on. Tell her. Come on guys.” Jackie encouraged.

‘Fuck, fuck, fuck. I suck at these things.’

Leah turned to face Shauna, they looked at each other awkwardly. Leah decided to bite the bullet.

Shauna, you’re the one person anyone can go to when having a shitty day and just being around you makes everything feels better - plus you’re one hell of a soccer player :) 

Leah ripped the page out of her book and handed it over to her. She fidgeted with her ring while Shauna read it.

“Wow, uh thanks.” Shauna carefully tucked the note into her pocket and looked back over at Leah. “I wish I was as brave as you.” Shauna paused at Leah's confused face. “It’s really obvious when you’re nervous, but you just do it anyway. You’re really brave Leah” She finished with a small smile, Leah couldn't look at her without anyone seeing her watery eyes.

Thank you 

She showed her notepad and turned away. 

Eventually Leah saw Jackie and Shauna leave, the rest of the team made their way back towards the party. Standing by the nearest tree stood Ricky, waiting for her. He waved at her and she waved back with a smile. 

Leah turned towards Nat and quickly wrote down in her notepad.

Is it okay if I meet you back at your place?

Nat squinted and took a few seconds to read it but she nodded once she had.

“Yeah, ‘course. I’ll see you later” She smiled widely looking at something above Leah's head, she mumbled something about a pirate hat, Leah just ignored her and ran over to Ricky.

He held out his hand for her to take, and she did. They walked towards his truck hand in hand.

“Did Leah just leave with Ricky fucking Nelson?” Tai looked bewildered. 

“Yes. She fucking did.” Van laughed loudly while looking equally as shocked.

 

Chapter 5: Embrace For Impact

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah scrunched her face as sunlight brushed over her face. She squinted her eyes as she opened them. Nat stood staring out the open window with a cigarette in her hand. Leah shuffled in bed, sitting up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. 

‘Never staying up that late again, urgh.’

“Morning” Nat mumbled looking briefly over her shoulder.

Leah smiled at her and reached over to grab her notepad from Nat’s dresser. 

Morning :) 

“You’re awfully fucking happy. Something happen last night?” Nat smirked and glanced over to the discarded varsity jacket on the top of Leah’s bag. Leah furrowed her eyes and shook her head.

We’re going to nationals today?

“So you’re telling me, nothing happened, when you left with Ricky Nelson?” She joked suggestively, throwing the burnt out butt of the cigarette out the window.

We went to get milkshakes? - do you know him?

She snorted as she sat down on the edge of her bed. “Who doesn’t know him, he’s one of those popular hot shot players.” She shrugged nonchalantly and Leah pursed her lips together.

Players? 

Nat rolled her eyes. “Milkshakes? Is that all you two did?” She said skeptically. Leah nodded offendedly with widened eyes.

“Seriously?” Leah crossed her arms and stared angrily which only made Nat laugh and put her hands up in mock surrender. 

“He didn’t try anything, did he?” Nat couldn’t help but look concerned. Leah shook her head.

We got milkshakes. We talked. It got late and he brought me back here.

“Fuck, he must really have it bad for you, huh?” She rhetorically asked but the question made Leah blush a dark shade of red. 

Nat jokingly cooed at her friend's blush. Leah swatted Nat’s hands away from pinching her cheeks. 

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Wicked” Nat awed at the sight of the private plane. Leah couldn’t help but feel the same, she’d never been on a plane before, let alone a private one. 

Van laughed in excitement. “I can’t believe your dad paid for a private plane.” Van gawked at Lottie.

“It’s pretty much his only form of parenting. I guess I'll take it” Lottie answered humbly and shrugged like it didn’t affect her but Leah slightly knew what that was like.

Her parents weren’t rich like the Matthews were but her father was barely ever home. When he’d get back from his long shifts at odd hours he’d bring her candy and snacks her mother would rather die than ever give her. It didn’t make her miss him any less but it did help make her feel a bit better.

“Well, thank you, Mr Matthews!” Sang Van and Laura Lee with giggles.

Leah shuffled past them and found herself an empty window seat. She placed her duffle bag in the overhead storage and placed her backpack on the leather seat next to her. Leah usually wouldn't mind someone sitting next to her but she’d forgotten to buy an extra notepad other than the new one tucked away in the pocket of the varsity jacket she was wearing. 

She didn’t want to look rude to not answer anyone just because she wanted to save as much paper as she could. 

‘Which is totally stupid, like there won't be places to buy notebooks at nationals.’

Eventually everyone found their seats and settled down for the long flight. Leah fidgeted with her ring as she looked out the window. 

She felt the ache in her eyes from the late night and early morning she’d had. Leah shut the shutter on the window and leaned back in her seat, closing her eyes drifting off to sleep.

A jolting feeling woke her up. She looked around and saw the plane wobble like it was fighting the air it was flying in. She heard the cries and screaming from the girls around her. Suddenly she was wide awake. 

An oxygen mask dropped down in front of everyone row by row. Leah saw the girls around her putting them on, so she did too. The jutting and shaking got worse and she saw someone falling down in the middle of the aisle. 

She reached over and lifted up the shade to look out the small window. Leah saw the green hills getting closer and closer, she started being able to see the tops of the pine trees. 

For some unknown reason she was fixated on the sight. In her mind she knew they were crashing and that the plane was getting closer to the unbending ground. Yet she felt calm, almost at ease at the terrifying view.

Leah sat there staring peacefully out the window. She could hear the chaos around her but ignored it all. Leah ripped the mask off her face and pulled her knees to her chest and buried her head between them. She placed her hand over her ears and blocked out the noise around her until the plane finally crashed.

She felt the jolt from the force of the plane hitting the ground and hit her head against her knee. Metal filled her mouth from her split lip but she stayed still.

Leah could hear muffled screaming and yelling but she wanted to wait until it all stopped but she didn’t. 

She fell out of her seat onto the messy ground. Leah peered down the aisle and saw Jackie dragging Shauna back from the incoming flames. 

“Shauna we gotta go!” Jackie yelled out as Shauna tried to stop her.

Jackie succeeded in getting them out of the plane, Leah looked where they’d come from and saw Van stuck in her seat, incoming flames kissing the back of her seat.

“No, Shauna! Please!” Van struggled and screamed out in pure terror.

‘Holy shit, Jackie, that’s cold’

Leah rushed over to Van, trying to pull at her stuck seatbelt. She held onto the belt and placed her foot on the side of Van seat, pulling with all her might. Blood dripped down her chin from her lip as she grimaced. The smoke around them burned their lungs. Leah heaved and tried another time. Pushing and pulling frantically at the stupid belt. Finally it gave way, unbuckling and setting Van free. Leah was flung backwards at the lack of resistance into the aisle. 

Van surged forward, grabbing Leah’s arm and they ran out of the plane. They staggered down the small dirt hill piled around the plane. There stood Jackie and Shauna who were paused in their tracks. Shauna gasped in surprise at the sight of Van while Jackie looked haunted.

“Surprise” Van scoffed looking Jackie dead in her eyes. Shauna gave her a small smile. Tai rushed up behind Van pulling her into a hug.

Leah saw Misty walk past holding a metal axe. Then she saw Coach Scott and his mangled leg from the fallen plane wing.

Misty lifted the axe above her head and swung it down, cutting off what was left of his leg without hesitation. Gasps and cries of shock rang out from the rest of the group.

‘Shit, that was hardcore’ 

“What the fuck” Nat muttered out with deer-like eyes.

Misty with blood splatter covering her face, unbuckled her belt and pulled it off, picked up her glasses and wrapped her belt around Coach Scott’s leg as a tourniquet. She looked out at the group with wild eyes.

“Help me move him!” She barked out.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah wasn’t proud to admit she walked as far away from the crash as she could. She couldn’t see or hear them anymore which was all that mattered to her. She was going to tell Nat that she was leaving but when she’d felt for her notebook in her pocket and it wasn’t there. The only thing that could make sense was she lost it in the crash.

She’d gone back into the plane to look for it. There was nothing around where she’d been sitting but when looking where Van had been trapped. All that was left was the melted remains of her ball point pen.

Leah knew she didn’t have the right to be as upset as she was about it. She wasn’t like Coach Scott, who’d lost his leg. Or like the bodies she had to pass on the plane, who lost their lives. But she’d lost her voice a second time, she’d lost her only form of communication with the rest of the group.

Suddenly everything felt real. She felt her body hurting, feeling all the aches and bumps from the crash. Everything around her was too loud and overwhelming. She’d left as fast as possible, only bringing her backpack with her.

She’d stopped walking when she found a small cliff overlooking a large lake and neighbouring mountains. Leah decided to sit and stay here, looking out at the view she leaned back against a large tree. She curled into herself and silently cried until the sky got dark and she fell asleep.

On the next day, Leah decided to hike towards the lake. Part of her knew she should go back for the rest of the group, but the thought of going back there made her legs shake. She’d have to go back there at some point, she’d left her duffle bag there. 

Leah left for the lake early in the morning, not wasting any daylight. It was around midday when she reached the cool waters. She took off her shoes and socks and sat at the edge of the water, dipping her feet in the lake.

Leah had been watching the sky all day, unless the rescuer came silently in the night. She assumed they hadn’t found them yet. Leah focused back to the large green mountains and sparkling blue lake.

‘Maybe this won’t be too bad’

She managed to stay awake late into the night, staring at the dark sky. The stars were unbelievable. There were so many of them! She couldn’t even count them all, even though she tried. 

She spent the second and third night staring up at the otherworldly sky ignoring the hunger in her stomach.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Oh shit. Oh, hell yeah, bitches!” Van yelled out at the sight of the lake running towards it.

Leah perked up at the sound of shouting and cheering, turning around from her spot at the edge of the lake. She saw the brief look of shock on Van’s face as she pulled off her shirt and pants. Leah smiled and waved at her and Van kept running past her straight into the lake.

“What the fuck, is this where you were?” Shauna walked over to Leah, who nodded in response with a guilty shrug. Shauna shook her head slightly and walked away once she realised Leah wasn’t going to further explain. Shauna started undressing and swam into the lake with the others. 

Leah sat playing with her shoelaces when Nat dropped Leah’s duffle bag next to her and sat down next to Leah. Nat folded her arms in front of her chest and glared at her. Leah looked over at her questioningly.

“We went looking for you.” Nat began while Leah looked at her with guilty eyes. “Thought you ran off to kill yourself or something”

Leah leaned over to where her makeshift campfire was and placed her finger in the burnt ash. She rolled her sleeve up and wrote on her arm.

No book

Nat furrowed her eyebrows trying to read the wonky words on Leah’s arm. 

“What happened to it?” Nat questioned. 

Leah repeated the ash process and wrote her faded grey answer.

Fire

“You didn’t pack another one?” Nat sassed with a raised eyebrow. Leah shook her head and Nat scoffed. “Well that’s fucking stupid.”

Leah silently huffed and turned away from Nat, wiping the ash off her arm. She was already beating herself up as it is, she didn’t need someone else to tell her the obvious.

“Why didn’t you just tell us? Instead of running of” Nat said puzzled. Leah shrugged sarcastically, rolling her eyes. 

‘Oh I don’t know. Should’ve just sang it to you while I was at it’

“You know what I mean! Like we had a fire, you could’ve written to me, like just now” Nat spat defensively.

Leah felt slightly bad. The image of Nat and the others worriedly looking for her played in her head. She put her finger back into the ash and wrote another note on her arm.

Sorry :( 

“Yeah, whatever” Nat muttered but looked less angry at her despite her words, both girls relaxed from their previous tense postures.

“Are we good?” Nat spoke up after a few minutes of silence. 

Leah nodded and smiled wobbly. She didn’t want to lose her only friend out here. She also didn’t want to be a problem for the rest of the group. She dragged her finger through the ash again.

Secret?

“What why?” Nat looked confused and a frown itched her face and Leah looked up at her with the biggest pleading eyes she could and brushed off the ash on her arm before writing her answer.

Please

“Yeah, sure okay. I promise or whatever” Nat nodded and looked down at Leah after getting up.

She brushed the small rocks out of her hand and walked over towards Mari and Jackie who were standing on the edge of the water.

Leah ended up going over and sitting next to where Javi Martinez stood throwing stones into the lake. He’d swiftly given up on skipping the stones, and resulted in seeing how far he could throw them. It was Leah’s unofficial job to hand him the best rocks. Every now and then he’d throw one partially far and look back at her. She’d smile and clap before handing him another lucky rock.

Eventually he’d gone back towards the rest of the group on the shore, sitting next to his brother Travis Martinez who was drying off from swimming in the Lake, while Leah sat and watched people take turns playing chicken with each other in the water.

“Guys!” Lottie yelled out, making everyone pause and look over at her. “Look!” She pointed to the other side of the lake and everyone turned to where she was looking. A shiny glimmer from something reflective shone out past the tall trees.

“What is that?” Someone in front of Leah muttered

“It looks like a reflection” Another girl Leah couldn’t see answered.

“Guys there’s something on the hill!” Van yelled out, everyone in the water rushed towards the shore.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

They hiked closer towards where they saw the reflection. After some time they ended up at a clearing, looking ahead, an old cabin came into Leah’s view.

“Guys, it’s here. It’s here!” Shauna yelled out and ran towards the closest window.

Leah watched as they ran towards the cabin, banging on the wooden door and the dusty windows.

“I don’t see anybody.” Akilah called out, peering into the window.

“Hello? Hello! Anybody home?” Tai yelled out waving her arms around.

The door finally gave way and they entered the abandoned cabin. Leah rushed up the stairs to enter the house behind Tai.

“Hello? Is anyone here?” Shauna called out.

“Maybe they just went on a hike?” Akilah, suggested at the sight of the empty cabin.

“Yeah, like a decade ago.” Jackie cringed.

Leah took in the cobwebs and utter disarray of the interior. Whoever used to live here, was definitely alone.

“It reeks in here” Jackie complained but wasn’t wrong, it stank of mold, musk and something else.

Nat swore under her breath at the state of the room. It had been a very long time since anyone had walked around here.

“You guys, check the pantry, see if there's any food. Everyone else, look around for stuff we can use. First aid, flashlights, tools.” Tai ordered out, placing Mari and Jackie on pantry duty.

Leah looked over the tables closed to the front door, nothing she found was immediately helpful. A few candles and empty glass bottles. Her eyes were starting to hurt from the dust being flown around.

She heard the sound of a can being opened and turned as Jackie left the pantry holding a half-opened tin.

“What the hell? Jackie, that’s not your personal buffet” Tai argued out but stopped when Jackie gasped and dropped the can. The moldy green contents spewed out against the wooden floor.

‘I am so, not cleaning that up’

Everyone gasped and gagged at the sight.

“See, this is why we should’ve stayed in the plane!” Jackie snapped out loudly.

‘Staying in a bloodsoaked half burnt plane or a smelly cabin… Yeah I’d take the smelly cabin thanks’

“Yeah, well, we didn’t. So this is helping how exactly?” Van chided.

“This is a fucking nightmare” Jackie stormed out the cabin. Everyone paused for an awkward second before continuing searching the cabin.

Leah searched a small couch sat against one wall. She wiped her hands from dust after she looked underneath it, finding nothing but more dust bunnies. She lifted the faded seating up and found a small silver pocket knife, placed between the seat and the armrest. She discreetly placed the folded knife into her pants pocket.

“Well, hello” Van said, thumping whatever she found down on the rickety table making a dust cloud form and fall around her. Leah got up from where she was knelt and wandered over.

“Don’t worry, guys. We might be stuck in the middle of nowhere, but hey, at least there’s porn” Van joked while holding up a french porn magazine.

The rest of the girls gathered around and picked up a magazine. Travis hesitantly walked closer. Leah looked over the shoulder of Mari and watched her flick through the pages.

“Hey, this guy kinda looks like you, Flex.” Mari bantered. Leah was fifty percent sure Mari was trying to flirt with him. Leah looked at the guy in the magazine in confusion. 

“If only any of you actually looked like her” Travis quipped , Leah shifted her gaze towards the woman.

‘Yeah, I’d be a porn star too if I looked like that’

“Do guys, like, actually jerk off to this stuff?” Akilah asked, pointing to the fold out poster of a naked dark haired woman.

“Nah, we-we hate that shit. You know, you can’t even tell what her favourite book is.” Travis stuttered out his joke. Van fake laughed while Leah silently chuckled.

‘My favorite book is Pet Cemetery… Which feels slightly ironic now .’

Travis turned and walked off, Mari gave him the middle finger while his back was turned. The rest of the girls turned their attention back towards the magazines and Leah kept looking around the room.

Leah looked out the blurry window and saw Travis arguing with Javi, she locked eyes with Nat as they exited the cabin quietly. Both her and Nat stood on opposite sides of the porch watching as the boys fought each other. Travis had his arm around Javi holding him in a makeshift headlock.

“Alright. He’s the whole reason we’re in this hell, and now he’s dead. Don’t you understand?” Travis picked something up and threw it as far as he could while Javi laid on the ground where Travis had pushed him.

“Dad is fucking dead!” Travis yelled out and turned to face his brother, realising what he’d done. He sighed and looked around. He locked eyes with Nat who was the only one in his view and stormed off. Nat watched him walk away, her eyes were glued to him. 

Leah watched Javi slowly pick himself up. She walked over to him hesitantly as if he was a scared animal. Which she guessed he kind of was. His head turned at the sound of her approaching footsteps and tensed up at her soft gaze. 

Javi was about to walk away from her but she held up her hand signaling him to wait. He didn’t know why but he listened. Leah dug into her pockets and fished out the small pocket knife, handing it over to the younger boy. 

He skeptically took it and looked at it closely. He figured out how to open it and the blade swung out, shining in the sun. He flipped it over, looking at the blade before the blade returned to its sheath. 

‘Maybe giving the only kid here a knife wasn’t the smartest idea ever.’

Javi grasped the knife in his hand tightly, as if it was the most precious thing he owned. He looked over at Leah but didn’t meet her eyes, giving her a brief smile. Leah glowed warmly.

‘Maybe it wasn’t that bad of an idea after all’

“My school had a shop class.” Javi paused and looked at Leah who hung on every word he said, nodding enthusiastically. “I wasn’t too bad at woodworking. I liked making things” He trailed off but Leah smiled widely at him. 

She squatted down and rubbed her finger in the dirt before writing on her arm, standing back up to show it to him. 

Find sticks?

“O-okay, the sticks can’t be too small or else it’s break but-” He cut himself off with a shy look, clearly not used to someone actually listening to him. Leah could understand, not many people wanted to have a long written conversation with someone when they could just talk properly with someone else. With a final look at Leah he continued, placing his hands in his pockets. Leah listened intensively while wiping her arm and hand on her pants.

“It can’t be too thick either, otherwise I can’t carve it with only this knife. In class there were like fifteen different kinds to use. It was sick” Javi recalled with a smile. Leah walked up behind Javi and brushed off the dirt and leaves on his back from where he’d fallen.

The pair started searching the surrounding area of the cabin for the right kind of sticks he could use for his crafts.

 

Chapter 6: I Call Shotgun (Said The Dead Guy)

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Waking up to finding a dead guy in the attic in the middle of the night wasn’t Leah’s favourite event in the last twenty-four hours. Burying said dead guy early that morning also wasn't on Leah’s bucket list but neither was being trapped in the wilderness with her soccer team in the first place.

Currently they were all spread out around the outside of the cabin having what was supposed to be breakfast. 

‘If we have one more soup-tea concoction, I'll lose it’

Leah sat next to Mari on a sideways log staring at her shoes. Opposite her was Shauna, Laura Lee and Van who occasionally talked to one another. Leah only sat in silence.

Travis sat on the porch aiming the rifle towards a squirrel in a nearby tree. The gun was found in the dead guy’s depressing bedroom.

“Hey!” Van yelled out rushing over towards Travis. “You don’t know what the hell you’re doing with that!” She pushed the barrel of the gun down towards the ground.

“He’s being fucking stupid.” Jackie answered monotone from where she sat on a wooden chair she brought out to the porch.

“No, what’s stupid is the fact that we have a gun and we’re not fucking using it” He argued and lifted the gun again, shooting the tree rather than the squirrel. 

The loud bang from the rifle made everyone flinch. Leah lifted her hands to her ears and kept them there. Jackie swore under her breath and Nat walked around the porch angrily.

“What the hell?” Nat looked around at the scene in front of her.

Laura Lee placed her hand on Leah’s arm gently pushing her hands away from her ears. Leah managed to hide her shell shocked face at the loud gunshot.

‘After all that, he didn’t even shoot the damn thing’

“Hey!” Coach Scott yelled out, managing to walk to the doorway on his makeshift crutch. “Give me that. Travis, give me the gun.” He ordered and Travis rolled his eyes but obeyed and handed him the gun. Coach Scott winced as he reached for the gun and unloaded the chamber.

“This is a dangerous weapon, and we will handle it as such. We understand?” All the girls nodded their heads. “All right, that said, Travis is right. We’re out of food. We’re all feeling it. The good news is my father used to take me deer hunting every year as a kid. The bad news… yeah, I am down to one fucking leg. Which means that if we want to eat, one of you is gonna have to learn how to use this thing.” Coach Scott finished. Leah looked around at everyone, Mari looked the most excited to try while Nat looked nauseous at the thought. 

‘Well, this is gonna go horribly.’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Slow breath in… Then full exhale, then go.” Coach Scott calmly explained as Tai lifted the gun up. Misty placed the small coin on the end of the gun. Tai pulled the trigger, letting out nothing but a small clank. The coin fell from the unloaded gun onto the forest floor.

“Damn it” Tai muttered under her breath.

“It’s okay, you guys. Hey, it’s not a competition.” Coach Scott repeated.

“But there is gonna be a winner, right?” Jackie interrupted and smiled at Tai as she was handed the rifle.

“All right, Jackie. You’re up” Coach Scott called out and Mari and a few others clapped for her in encouragement.

Jackie lifted the gun and Misty placed the coin on the gun once again, Jackie lifted the gun again for a better position and the coin fell off onto the ground. Tai and Van laughed loudly at the sight.

“Okay this is literally impossible.” Jackie groaned and looked back at the group.

“Not impossible for Leah” Lottie said with a smile looking over at Leah who stood leaned against the doorway with a sheepish grin. It shocked her more than anyone else that she’d been able to keep the small coin on the barrel of the gun.

“All right, come on, let’s keep it moving. Martinez. Let’s go” Coach Scott nodded at Travis who stood next to him.

Travis grabbed the gun but looked back at Javi. “Yo, Javi, come try this” Travis held out the gun for him.

“Fuck you” Javi said and didn’t even look at him as he walked away. The group of girls ‘oohed’ quietly.

“Nice going, Flex” Laura Lee murmured and Travis looked at the ground before turning back around. 

“Let’s go” He said and Misty picked the coin off the floor.

Leah pushed herself off the wall she was leaning against and walked after Javi. 

‘Poor kid just lost his dad and is stranded with a bunch of girls he doesn’t know, and he has a grieving brother taking it out on him’

Misty placed the coin on the gun once Travis had lifted it up. A soft clank was heard and the coin rested on top of the gun. Small claps rang out from the group behind him.

“See, and that, ladies, is how it’s done” Travis tested the girls’ patience again, looking back at the group smugly. He looked over to where Leah had been but she wasn’t there anymore, Travis shifted his gaze over to Nat and handed her the gun.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah let Javi storm off further into the forest, it was clear he needed a moment alone. She knew better than most what that was like. Leah settled down on a fallen tree laying on the ground and waited. 

After a while Javi slowly returned holding something in his hands. He looked over at Leah and looked surprised she’d waited for him. She waved at him and he timidly smiled walking quickly over.

He silently handed over what was in his hands, a blank piece of paper and a blue pen. Leah’s eyes widened at the sight. 

“I borrowed it for you” He whispered as if sharing a secret. She hesitantly took the paper from him with shaky hands. 

Thank you Javi

Javi smiled and nodded to himself when she turned the page around to face him. They sat together and talked about everything and anything they could think of until the paper was completely filled in.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Now that we’ve narrowed down the field, here’s how this is gonna go. One final round for all of the marbles. You’ve got five targets, five shots each. Leah, can you start us off?” Coach Scott explained and Leah nodded moving forward.

“Um, just a thought. Shouldn’t we be saving bullets, you know?” Laura Lee interrupted to ask hesitantly.

“Yeah, in theory, but lucky for us, the nut job who lived here before was apparently hoarding for the apocalypse.” Coach Scott answered as Leah loaded the rifle and aimed for the first can on top of the fallen tree in the distance.

Leah breathed as Coach Scott had taught them too and she fired the gun. The can fell over from the force of the bullet hitting it straight through the middle of it. Leah looked wide eyed at the space where the can had been. The shot from the gun echoed in her ears making her wince. 

She heard the muffled applauding from behind her and felt each of their eyes on her, like daggers into her skin. Her chest burned painfully and she fought to keep her eyes dry from tears. Shakily Leah looked at Coach who gently nodded at her. She shook her head and handed the rifle to Mari, who took it cautiously from her.

Leah didn’t look at anyone as she started to walk away from the group, Jackie started to walk over to her to stop her.

“What? She didn’t finish her turn” Jackie complained but Coach Scott waved her off dismissively.

“Let her go, guns aren’t everyone’s thing” He nodded to Mari who waited for Van to finish placing a can where the old one had been.

Jackie looked over at Laura Lee who shrugged and they watched Leah walk away into the distance, before turning back towards Mari who loaded the gun about to fire.

Leah didn’t know where she was going. She was just walking in the farthest direction away from that gun and the loud shots that rang out from it. Her eyes burned with tears and the green trees around here blurred together.

She felt herself heaving and her throat hurt from her deep breaths but her lungs felt empty, unable to be used. She stopped walking and knelt onto the cold grass underneath her. A sharp stone from the forest floor dug its way into her knee but she didn’t move away. Leah wiped the warm tears from her flushed cheeks and onto her rough shorts.

She’d walked far enough away, the shots from the rifle couldn’t be hurt, instead all that made noise was the tall branches around her and the odd fluttering from a passing bird. She stayed there until her breathing returned to normal. She felt groggy and her eyes stung. The heavy weight on her chest had moved to her shoulders and now all she felt was tired. 

She wiped her eyes and staggered back towards the cabin to sleep the rest of the day away.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah watched from inside the cabin as Travis and Nat stormed off into the forest to hunt for something for the group to eat. She moved to sit on the old wooden floor and rested her head against the wall looking up at the ceiling. 

The door to the cabin creaked open. Tai walked in searching the room before locking eyes with Leah.

“There you are, you can’t keep disappearing on us” Tai reprimanded but her tone was kind. Leah looked away but nodded anyway.

Tai walked over and knelt in front of her, holding Leah’s upper arms. “C’mon, we’re going searching for berries and shit” Tai smiled and Leah silently laughed.

Tai helped her pull her up and they walked off with the rest of the girls to search for edible forage. 

It meant a lot to Leah that Tai made sure to include her, even if it was just looking for leaves and berries. Leah stuck by her and Van as they searched the forest floor.

“Are any of these, like, maple syrup trees?” Laura Lee asked after a while of searching.

“What?” Tai asked in confusion as they kept walking.

“I don’t know” Laura Lee whispered with a faint shake of her head.

Leah smiled at the interaction, moving closer to look around where Van was looking through some bushes.

“Don’t eat that kind!” Akilah yelled out rushing over to Misty who had a mushroom half in her mouth. “It’s poisonous” She continued and ripped the mushroom from Misty’s grasp.

“Like, ‘kill you’ poisonous or like ‘trip your balls off’ poisonous?” Van asked, Leah assumed she was joking but she looked too intrigued for Leah to tell.

“What? I don’t know. My girl scout troop leader didn’t get all that specific about it” Akilah stressed.

“Akilah” Tai asked, holding something in her hands.

“Okay, now, those I know for sure will make you puke. Don’t touch it” Akilah answered with certainty.

“Could you just show us something that’s actually edible so we can get going?” Misty complained

“What’s the big hurry?” Tai side eyed her as she stood up from where she was knelt.

“Coach need a sponge bath?” Van taunted and Tai burst out laughing. Leah and Laura Lee had to look away to hide their silent laughter.

“That’s just mean” Tai muttered between laughs.

“I’m sorry, whatever” Van called out as Misty stormed off.

Leah shook her head with a smile at the pair laughing their asses off. She walked over towards Lottie who stopped in her tracks looking at a tree. Leah was about to tap her shoulder when Jackie's voice rang out over the forest.

“Uh, guys…” Jackie called out.

“What?” Van and Tai called out as they ran over towards her. Leah and Laura Lee followed behind them.

“Look! Holy shit” Jackie yelled out as the rest of the girls questioned her.

A small passenger plane covered in moss and vines sat still standing.

‘No fucking way!’

“Wh-what is this doing here?” Tai said in disbelief.

“It must have belonged to the dead guy!” Jackie answered over her shoulder with a grin.

“I wonder if this still works” Laura Lee said as she opened the creaking plane door and hopped in.

“Guys, this is it!” Jackie excitedly yelled. Van pushed the plane's front propeller as Laura Lee started pushing buttons. Leah walked backwards, away from the plane.

The small plane groaned alive, inching forward where Van and Jackie stood. They froze at the sight of the fast propeller, Jackie pushed Van out of the way and stood frozen like a deer in headlights.

“Turn it off!” The girls yelled out to Laura Lee who looked as panicked as they did.

Leah knelt down to help Van and silently watched the plane stop in its tracks from the vines wrapped around it before finally turning off. Jackie sighed in relief while Lottie stared at the vines.

“It didn’t want him to leave” Lottie muttered and Tai stared up at her, unconvinced.

‘Whatever the hell that means…’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat on the ground, not caring about the dirt staining her pants as Javi handed her another piece of paper from the pile he’d collected for her. She smiled at him as she took it, placing the fully used previous page in her pocket.

She appreciated Javi gathering paper for her to talk to him. Part of her knew she should be saving the pages, to be able to talk to the rest of the group. But she didn’t have the heart to break it to him that they’d need to cut their talks short.

“What about your favorite music?” Javi looked down at her from his seat on a fallen log, tapping his hand on his knees absentmindedly.

She paused for a moment, before writing down a few that came to mind and showed it to him.

The Cranberries, The Cure or Nirvana - Can’t pick a favourite 

Javi slightly laughed after he read it, which made her furrow her eyebrows in confusion.

“Travis likes those ones too” His smile slightly dimmed at the mention of his older brother. 

‘Huh, I didn’t think he’d have good taste’

What about video games?

She turned it around after she’d written it, hoping to distract him from everything going on. Once he’d read it he sat up a bit straighter.

“My mom just bought me tomb raider, I only got to play a little bit of it, but it’s so cool” He began to explain the game, his eyes lighting up in a way Leah hadn’t seen before. She smiled and made sure to ask as many questions as she could think of. Leah wanted to make sure Javi knew she was not only listening but was excited to be told about something he liked.

Once again they eventually ran out of paper for Leah to write on.

“I’ll try to find you more” Javi promised as he looked over at her while they walked back to the cabin. 

Leah smiled at him and nudged him softly with her shoulder in a silent thanks.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Natalie and Travis had been successful in their hunting, bringing back a deer for the group to eat. The group sat outside the cabin around the campfire in quietness as they ate properly for the first time in weeks. 

Leah stuffed her face so fast her stomach ached, but it was worth it. 

“Hey. I, uh, I kind of forgot that I had this. Want to hold on to it?” Travis muttered to Javi pulling out a golden ring. 

Whatever meaning it had, clearly it meant a lot as Javi cradled in his hands with a smile. He sat there inspecting the small ring. Leah smiled at the younger boy, briefly looking over at Travis who was smiling at Nat. 

‘Guess they sorted out their problem then’

Leah turned her attention back towards Javi who nudged her. He leaned down to where she was sitting on the ground and held out the ring in his hands, allowing her to look at the ring in the firelight.

She smiled sincerely at him and for once he reciprocated.

 

Chapter 7: 1-800-FUCK-THIS

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The walkman blasted out music inside the darkened cabin. 

“One two, one, two, three, four!” Mari yelled out over the music and the large group got into position. 

Leah sat at the foot of Coach Scott’s makeshift bed, Travis sat behind them on one of the old wooden chairs. Misty stood dancing around watching the rest of the group. The group danced in their organized chaos. Mari shuffled around letting Javi dance in the middle of the group of girls. 

‘This was both incredibly embarrassing and incredibly endearing’

Coach Scott snapped in tune with the song a few times and Leah’s shoulder shook with silent laughter. The girls and Javi kept dancing until the music died down.

“Goddamn it” Van muttered picking up the walkman.

“What happened?” Shauna asked with puffed breath.

“I don’t know” Van hit the walkman a few times. “Has hitting something ever fixed it?” Van added rhetorically.

“M-Maybe try blowing on it?” Mari said, leaning over Shauna's shoulder. Van prompt blew on it.

A creaking noise caused them all to look up at the attic.

“Uh, the fuck was that?” Jackie blurted out.

“Hey, you heard it, too?” Lottie whispered but they all heard her.

“It was probably just a branch” Tai said assertively.

“Inside, on the floor?” Mari said skeptically with wide eyes and Tai sighed “What if it’s… him” Mari muttered scaredly

“What, the dead guy?” Shauna scoffed out.

Leah was one hundred percent sure the dead guy was definitely dead. They buried him and everything!

“Um, yeah” Mari looked down as she spoke.

“You know what it probably was? The dead guy’s missing fingers trying to find their way home.” Nat spookily looked around. Akilah wacked Nat’s arm and the rest of the group jeered at her in disgust.

“You really have to encourage them?” Tai dismissed Nat’s joke with a side eye.

“You got to admit, it didn’t sound like it was on the roof.” Akilah warily noted.

“Fine, then it was a rat or a raccoon, or something. I don’t know, it…” Jackie was shushed by Lottie who stared up at the ceiling.

“Oh my god” Tai swore under her breath.

“Listen” Lottie whispered and they all waited in silence.

‘Waiting for the horror movie scream… or?’

“Well, I don’t hear it now” Mari groaned, letting her arms fall to her sides.

“See?” Tai said

“All right, all right. You know what I think it was? I think the ghost decided it was time to get some sleep. And we should probably do the same, yeah?” Coach Scott sighed out, mediating the group. 

The group of varying agreement nodded nonetheless. Leah got up from her seat and smiled at Coach and Javi before moving over to her place on the floor.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah woke up to the rising sun. She shuffled into the pantry and got dressed for the day. Exiting the cabin she looked around the porch for the metal bucket. Sitting next to the burnt out campfire, Leah picked it up but was stopped when the cabin door opened.

“Hey, what’re you doing up?” Mari walked down the stairs, still buttoning up her shorts.

Leah opened her mouth and shut it again, awkwardly shifting around in place. Mari swore and nodded walking back into the cabin. Leah didn’t know whether to wait for her to come back or not. Before she could decide Mari rushed back out holding a piece of paper and a short pencil.  

“There. When’d you run out?” She handed it over to Leah who took it graciously.

Day one - I was going to get water for breakfast

“What? Why didn’t you try to tell us?” Mari’s mouth hung open when Leah only shrugged.

Not important, food was priority.

“You’re important too Leah. We’re a team, remember?” Mari placed her hand over Leah’s. Leah’s lip quivered and she nodded.

Thank you :) 

“‘Course.” Mari smiled and looked around the outside of the cabin. “I suppose I'll get the fire started.” Leah nodded while slipping the paper and pencil into her pocket and picked up the bucket.

“Which is good because I really didn’t want to walk all the way to the lake, again” Mari called out as Leah walked further into the forest with a smile.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Is she still asleep?” Nat walked over towards Leah, Laura Lee and Van who were unofficially on clothes duty.

Leah nodded at Nat while hanging up some wet clothes Van handed her. Nat sighed and shook her head walking into the cabin.

After a few minutes Jackie walked out of the cabin. Leah and Laura Lee swapped sides and continued placing clothes where they fit.

“Hey. Bloody soldiers on the left and breakfast on the right. Okay? Don’t mess them up like Travis did.” Akilah said

Travis dropped his spoon in his bowl. “Okay, you guys are disgusting. I’m…” Travis placed his bowl down and staggered off away from the group of girls. Leah’s shoulders silently shake with laughter.

‘Fair enough I suppose’

 “Shut up” Akilah laughed as he left.

Jackie walked down the porch stairs and Mari ran over to her pushing the metal bucket into her chest.

“How about getting some more water? Breakfast isn’t going anywhere” Mari stated and Jackie looked shocked but didn’t argue.

Leah watched as Jackie strutted off with the bucket in her hand. She locked eyes with Mari who rolled her eyes dramatically and walked off. 

She didn’t want to admit it, but Jackie slacking off was starting to annoy her too. Leah understood she was their captain and all, but shouldn’t she be leading by example? Rather than not doing anything at all…

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah spent the next part of her day, foraging with Misty and Gen. Which otherwise would’ve been fine if not for the fact that Misty would not stop talking her ear off. She didn’t mean to sound rude but it was clear Misty was talking more to herself than to Leah. Leah was just the only one who wouldn’t tell her to shut up, and she was milking it.

Nevertheless they were able to find more edible forage for later meals, which was always a positive. The three girls finally wandered back to the cabin. They placed the bundles of forage into the pantry inside the cabin, ready for later use.

Misty left with a wide smile walking further into the cabin, over to where Coach Scott was resting. While Gen finished organizing the pantry for them. Leah exited the cabin and saw Tai watching Jackie and Shauna while hanging up some more clothes.

“Ugh! These batteries. Fucking cocksucker.” Jackie groaned loudly, swapping their remaining batteries into the walkman.

Leah watched from her peripheral vision as Shauna looked around at the rest of them and walked over to Jackie, pulling the headphones from her head. Leah sat down and started hand cleaning more clothes opting to help Tai with the chores as Shauna pulled Jackie away from the group.

Tai looked down at the emptier pile of clothes and gave her a small smile.

“Thanks Leah” Tai hummed and Leah nodded at her, handing her another clean shirt to hang up.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah helped carry one of the buckets Laura Lee was trying to carry onto the corner of the porch when a shriek from inside the cabin rang out through the cabin.

Mari ran out of the front door frantically. “Get it off. Get it off, get it off, get it off!” Mari squealed, reaching behind her to try to wipe something away.

“Hang on. Hey, hang on. Hey.” Shauna ran over, helping her try to wipe something off her back, Akilah rushed over too, checking her over.

“What’s going on?” Shauna questioned when she couldn’t find anything. Leah walked over with Laura Lee, so did Tai and Van who didn’t look too impressed.

“I don’t know. I- I was standing under the trap door.” Mari whined out.

“I don’t see anything” Shauna double checked her.

“But something crawled down my shirt.” Mari groaned out and shook her sweater hectically.

‘Ugh, bugs. My least favourite thing in these woods. Well other than the buried corpses.’

“It’s fine. There’s nothing there. Mari. It’s fine” Shauna assured her, looking into her eyes.

“Must have been the ghost” Tai deadpanned with her arms crossed. The group all looked at Tai. 

“Don’t say that” Mari said glumly.

“Wh… You guys.” Jackie gasped and walked closer to them. “Okay, you guys, I just had a brainstorm. We should have a seance.” She smiled and looked around the group expectantly.

Tai chuckled “That’s a terrible idea. Also, we’re not in middle school.” 

‘Not to mention that’s how every horror movie starts!’

“But remember how fun this shit used to be? Besides, maybe if we can laugh about this, then it would help.” Jackie explained.

“The occult is no laughing manner” Laura Lee protested plainly.

“It’s not the occult, Laura Lee. It’s a game. Come on, Shauna, tell them. It’ll be fun.” Jackie shrugged trying to sound optimistic.

Leah didn’t like how Jackie threw Shauna under the metaphorical bus. Everyone looked at Shauna, and Leah could feel the second hand nervousness.

“Um… well, I mean, it’s not like we have anything better to do. And maybe this dead guy can give us some life advice.” Shauna tried, making Van and Tai laugh.

‘Life advice? From the dead guy? Right…’

“So, it’s settled. Tonight, the attic. We make contact.” The rest of the group laughed except Laura Lee who surrendered and walked off. Leah wasn’t too far behind her.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The sound of muffled laughter from the attic and Tai chopping slices of wood off a stick bounced off the cabin walls. Leah sat in front of the flickering fire holding her knee close to her chest. 

“If you’re thinking about flying that thing, you’re even crazier than those idiots upstairs.” Tai said looking at Laura Lee. 

Leah shifted around to look at the pair sitting at the table, she saw Laura Lee flicking through the plane’s manual. 

“My grandpa used to fly a Cessna, and he could barely write his name. It can’t be that hard” Clearly the look on Tai's face made Laura Lee cave. “Okay, fine. It’s probably hard. But there’s no harm in reading about it” 

“Coach, are you listening to this?” Tai exasperated looking over at him in his chair by the fire, who only sighed dismissively.

“No” Coach Scott grumbled.

Another wave of laughter rang out from the attic. Javi got up from his seat walking towards the attic trapdoor.

“I’m gonna go see what’s so funny.” Javi huffed.

‘Great. Thanks kid’

Leah got up after him, pouting at Tai who rolled her eyes. Leah followed Javi into the attic.

Javi sat between Travis and Nat while Leah silently moved to sit on Nat’s other side.

“I thought I told you to stay downstairs” Travis muttered to Javi shuffling over to make room in the circle for him.

“Whatever. It’s boring” Javi crossed his legs like everyone else in the circle.

“I think they got divorced recently. It could’ve been guilt money” Van said

“Well, that’s just creepy” Mari said, leaning over the lit candles.

“Well, honey, your mom and I are splitting up, but don’t worry, ‘cause your tits are gonna look amazing” Van put on a deep voice joking about a story they clearly joined in the middle of.

Tai joined them in the attic sitting in the dead man’s chair in the corner, Leah looked over at her and smiled slightly before turning back to the circle.

“Okay. Guys, guys, focus. Next question.” Jackie interrupted the disorderly teenagers. Misty raised her hand gingerly. 

“Misty” Jackie called out for her to continue causing the glasses wearing girl to chuckle nervously.

“Um… Dear Spirit, I need to know the truth. Does the person I like like me back?” Misty asked honestly.

“Aww” Jackie murmured at the sight while Leah tried not to grimace.

The knife Shauna held on a small rope dangled around, Leah didn’t know which way meant what but it seemed to be good news for Misty.

“Oh. Okay” Van softly laughed in surprise at the silly swinging knife.

The girls whistled and oohed in a playful manner while Misty held her hand to her mouth in excitement. Giggles rang out through the attic making Leah smile.

“Okay. Next question?” Jackie asked the group.

Javi raised his hand and the older girl nodded at him to continue.

“Are we all gonna die out here?” Javi asked plainly. Leah tried not to let her eye twitch. The room’s atmosphere dropped instantly. 

‘Shit, kid. Talk about brutal honesty’

Travis whacked his younger brother's arm. Everyone looked towards the hanging knife, it moved in a weaving motion.

“Okay, an eight? What’s that supposed to mean?” Van deflected with obvious fright.

“It’s not an eight. It’s an infinity” Mari mumbled, still watching the knife.

“Yeah, okay, Aristotle.” Van tried to shrug it off. 

Leah watched Lottie turn around out to face the window. She let out a blood curdling scream. A second later the window burst open, all the candles blew out in the night wind.

“Who has the matches?” Jackie yelled over Lottie’s constant screaming.

Misty shut the window as Van and Akilah held Lottie, trying to calm her down.

‘Told you, fucking horror movie’

Lottie rocked back and forth hyperventilating. Someone began lighting the candles again.

“Guys, something’s really wrong with her.” Van called for help as Lottie began crying out.

“I-I don’t, think she…” Akilah trailed off, not truly knowing what to say.

Leah focused her sights on the darkest parts of the room. She felt her breathing ease as she stared blankly at the shadowy corners of the attic. Leah was able to muffle the deranged voices of her scared teammates around her.

She could see the group moving around her, she could just make out their mouths moving. But every time she focused on what they were saying, she drifted farther away from the darkness. Their loud voices overwhelmed her, pushing her to keep staring at the corners of the room. 

Her eyes felt wide, she could feel the sting of the air hitting them, but she couldn’t bring herself to blink. Leah felt her chest moving, breathing but it felt like it belonged to somebody else. 

It wasn’t until the room fell into silence that Leah pulled away from her view. She zoned back in and looked around at the group. Laura Lee stood breathing heavily looking down at Lottie who’s forehead was bleeding down her face.

“Ow. What the hell, Laura Lee?” Lottie whined as if nothing had previously happened. Everyone but Leah stared at her with varying levels of fear and confusion.

“Seriously? What the motherfuck just happened?” Mari questioned huddling next to Gen on the floor.

‘That, is a very good fucking question’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Everyone laid awake in their bed rolls. It was painfully clear that no one was sleeping anytime soon. Leah stared at the ceiling fighting her frustration with Laura Lee whispering prayers in her ear. 

“Do we think it’s still up there?” Akilah mumbled while playing with the ends of her hair.

Tai sat up angrily. “You all need to stop. There’s nothing up there. Lottie’s been acting weird for weeks” Tai declared for the entire room.

Leah looked over to Lottie who snored quietly, asleep on the small couch with a bandage on her head. No one answered Tai.

“Fine. I’ll prove it.” Tai said as she picked up her bag and rolled her bed roll up.

“You’re gonna sleep up there?” Akilah questioned

“That’s right. Who’s with me?” Tai looked out at the rest of the group who shuffled nervously. 

Tai looked over at Laura Lee who only shuffled back into bed and began praying again. Tai looked over at Van who shook her head. Everyone in the group looked away from Tai, except for Leah, who put her hand up in the air. 

Tai looked surprised but swallowed it and looked around the room again. “Fine. More room for us, then.” 

Leah grabbed her things and began walking towards the attic, she looked over at Javi who looked deeply into her eyes. She gave him the most reassuring smile she could manage and hoped that would be enough for him.

She climbed up the ladder like stairs after Tai. Leah placed her bed roll next to Tai’s, but leaving enough space so she wouldn’t accidently kick Tai in her sleep.

“Thanks Leah” Tai whispered after they’d tucked into their respective blankets. Leah shuffled over to pat Tai’s shoulder in a silent comfort before twisting back around, and getting comfortable.

Leah heard the creak of the ladder like stairs after a while of silence. Both girls sat up looking at the trapdoor. Shauna’s head popped up and she clambered into the attic with her things.

“Come to join us?” There was a slight bite to Tai’s words

“If that’s okay” Shauna said in a timid voice. Leah nodded and shuffled over letting Shauna place her things between her and Tai. Once Shauna had laid down, both Tai and Leah did too. 

“How far along are you?” Tai whispered out but it felt like she’d yelled it in the quietness of the attic.

Leah's eyes widened comically and she whipped her head to face both girls. Both Shauna and Tai looked at each other with bated breaths.

“You are pregnant, right?” Tai asked gently, but alarms were ringing in Leah's head. 

‘What the fuck was going on tonight.’

 “You won’t tell anyone… will you?” Shauna asked with full vulnerability. Tai shook her head.

“No. I won’t and Leah won't either, right?” Tai turned to face Leah with urgency in her eyes. 

Leah’s eyebrows furrowed together and she sat up so Shauna and Tai could both see her. She waved to her mouth as if to say ‘obviously’, but nodded when she saw Shauna’s scared face.

She held up her hand pointing her pinky at Shauna. Shauna breathily laughed holding Leah’s pinky with her own, a pinky promise not to tell.

‘I think it’s safe to say things were gonna get a whole lot worse out here’

 

Chapter 8: Avoidance Isn't A Solution

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Seriously? How the fuck are there no fucking berries?” Mari loudly complained, kicking the plant in front of her.

Leah stood up from where she knelt, also finding no berries in the bushes closest to her.

“The birds could be picking them off. Or- or mice” Akilah scratched her head.

“I’d eat the crap out of a mouse right now” Van said dreamily from where she sat on a large tree root.

“Ew, gross” Mari muttered out, scrunching up her face.

“You know, some animals live off eating their own vomit” Lottie chimed in from behind one of the surrounding bushes.

‘Now, that’s gross’

“Okay. Thanks for that image, Lot” Van cringed at her imagination and Leah did too.

“Did Dead Cabin Guy tell you that, or do you guys just chat about blood and stuff?” Mari taunted and Lottie frowned.

“No, we mostly talk about how Danny Mears dumped you for his own cousin” Lottie fake smiled and walked off.

‘Damn. I’ve been missing out on all the gossip’

“Hey, they’re second cousins. And that’s totally legal, you know” Mari tried to explain which honestly just made it worse.

Leah and Van shared a humorous look before focusing on Lottie standing in the distance. Both girls walked over to her.

“Hey, look, ignore Mari, okay? I don’t think she’s taken a shit in, like, two weeks.” Van joked and Lottie half-smiled at her.

“Yeah” Lottie’s smile faltered “Are you okay?” Van asked and Lottie looked over her shoulder slightly.

“What’s wrong?” Lottie shook her head at Van’s question.

“Nothing. It- It… It’s fine” She smiled and Van nodded at her, inviting her back over towards the group.

Leah stayed a bit behind to look over where Lottie had been looking. There was nothing but more fruitless bushes.

‘Strange’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah was never one to sneak out. But seeing as they were in the middle of fucking nowhere, she really didn’t think it matter anymore. She carefully exited the attic and made sure not to wake the rest of the group as she left the cabin during the middle of the night.

She’d originally planned to steal a candle or something so she would be able to see where she was going, but the brightness of the moon and the plethora of stars in the sky gave off more than enough light, once her eyes had fully adjusted.

She still staggered through the forest, making sure to go in one direction, to not get lost on her way back. She’d bumped into a few branches and scraped her knee from tripping over a root but it was all worth it when she found a hidden secret.

In a small clearing was a large old tree, with weeping leaves blowing in the breeze. The tree itself was beautiful but what took Leah’s breath away was the tiny glow bugs flying around in the leaves. Leah sat on one of the many outstretching roots of the gorgeous tree. 

She watched the glow bugs mindlessly flutter around above her, letting her thoughts float away with them. For once she wasn’t afraid, of the forest, of tomorrow, of going home. She felt serenity, peace. 

Eventually the night breeze got too much for her and her eyes stung with fatigue. She made her way back towards the cabin. 

Outside the cabin, in the clearing, she ran into Tai and Van who were also coming back to the cabin. They looked at her with wide eyes but all Leah did was wave at them with a smile and kept walking quietly into the cabin.

Leah creeped up to the attic with Tai not far behind her.

“Hey. Where have you two been?” Shauna whispered out as Tai’s head popped up from the trapdoor after Leah.

“Had to pee, Leah waited for me” Tai whisper-lied but Leah obviously didn’t say anything, she just sat on her bedroll, pulling her blanket over her legs.

“What are you doing up?” Tai questioned as she walked towards her bedroll.

“Bad dream” Shauna sighed and rubbed the back of her neck as she sat up.

“What was it this time? A cheeseburger baby?” Tai joked softly

“I never should have told you about that” Shauna breathily chuckled but quickly lost her smile.

“What am I gonna do?” Tai sat down in front of her and Leah shuffled over.

“I heard Katie Lingstrom did it with the underwire of her bra last year” Shauna’s eyes were glossy with unshed tears. Leah didn’t know how the hell to help but she assumed a supportive presence would’ve been better than nothing.

“Have you lost your mind? You’ll die” Tai argued

“I’ll probably die either way. I’m in the middle of nowhere, and the ob-gyn on call is Misty fucking Quigley. At least this way I won’t die having my best friend…” She trailed off.

‘Fair fucking enough. Leah would rather die than have Misty Quigley as her medical support’

“What… were you about to say? Shauna?” Tai questioned.

“That at least this way I won’t die having my best friend’s boyfriend’s baby” Shauna looked down as she spoke defeatedly.

“It’s Jeff’s?” Tai asked wide eyed.

‘Fuck. Are you kidding me? Wow. One day without groundbreaking drama. Just one damn day. Please?’

Shauna nodded softly and Leah shuffled slightly.

“Whoa. Okay. I mean… Wow. Yeah” Tai muttered in surprise. “But still, Shauna, it’s not worth dying to keep Jackie from finding out. I have a plan, all right? To head south and find help. So just wait.”

Tai leaned over placing her hand on Shauna “Please. Promise me you won’t do anything stupid.” Shauna vaguely nodded and Tai moved over to her bedroll.

Leah stayed up with Shauna holding her hand while she slept, to wake her up in case of another nightmare.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat on the porch stairs playing with her newly braided hair. Akilah sat on the stair above them braiding Mari’s hair.

Most of the girls were spread out across the outside of the cabin, doing various different chores or those who finished theirs for the day sat around talking with each other.

Travis and Nat made their way back to the cabin, letting go of each other’s hand when they saw the group looking at them. The rest of the group whistled and cooed at the lovebirds.

“Natalie and Travis sittin’ in a tree. K-I-S-S-I…” Laura Lee sang with a grin and Leah suppressed a smile.

“I think they were doing a bit more than kissing” Lottie grinned looking at the pair.

“Hey, Nat, what exactly are you and Flex hunting for out there, anyway?” Mari joked.

“I hear it’s beaver season!” Van called out with a smirk.

“Ah, sit and spin, assholes” Nat held her middle finger out to the group.

“Is this why we don’t have any food? ‘Cause you’ve been too busy running for mayor of pound town?” Jackie crossed her arms, as she spoke angrily.

“Uh, go fuck yourself?” Nat snarkily answered.

Everyone lost their smiles as they looked over at Jackie who didn’t seem content on backing down anytime soon.

“I guess we shouldn’t be surprised. Nat’s always down for a good time, right?” Jackie sauntered down the stairs with a harsh stare.

‘There’s no way she just said that’

“I can’t magically conjure a deer, Jackie. But keep talking shit, I’ll find something to shoot” Nat said as she stalked closer.

“Oh, wow. Oh, you’re so tough. I’m not scared of you, burnout” Jackie laughed with a glare. 

‘What the fuck is going on, when’d Jackie turn into a bitch?’

“No, you’re jealous. ‘Cause you’re an uptight, prudish little bitch” Nat spat out which made Leah shrink in her seat with a tiny smirk.

“Hey! Knock it off. Both of you” Tai pushed Nat away and broke up the little fight. Jackie held up her middle finger and strolled back into the cabin with a smug smile.

Leah stood up as she saw Misty whispering something to her before Nat walked off. Leah jogged after her and walked with her silently. Nat turned slightly to glance at Leah before continuing walking away from the front of the cabin. 

They sat facing each other in silence on the outskirts of the forest, the cabin still in sight through the tree branches. Leah nudged Nat with her knee with a small smile. Nat looked at her questioningly and Leah widened her eyes comically trying to convey her thoughts.

Leah rubbed her finger in the dirt below them and wrote on her arm. 

So?

Nat rolled her eyes. “What?” She asked harshly, still defensive from the whole Jackie incident.

No milkshake date then?

Leah had to twist her arm to write the whole thing but Nat was able to read it nonetheless. Leah playfully smiled and for once, Nat smiled too.

“Obviously not.” She laughed, making her shoulders shake. Leah nodded her head to tell her to continue.

Nat inched closer to Leah, making their knees touch as she leaned in. “He’s a really good kisser” She whispered with a blush Leah's never seen on Nat before.

Leah's shoulder shook with silent laughter and Nat’s quiet giggles were for them and the forest to keep secret.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah knelt on the porch sorting the firewood in piles for easier access during the night.

“Oh my god. Meat. Fuck yeah!” Van yelled out standing up from her place around the campfire.

Leah looked over and saw Nat and Travis carrying a deer with bloody antlers. As they walked closer the rest of the group noticed the antlers too.

“Woah. That thing is gnarly.” Van mumbled.

“Like Freddy Krueger and Bambi had a baby” Akilah said, crossing her arms.

They placed the deer down on the ground. “I’m not eating that” Javi muttered. Leah couldn’t really blame it, it looked pretty gross.

“Guys, relax. Deer shed their antlers every season. This is normal” Coach Scott stated as he hobbled over. “Shauna, do the honors” He nodded to her.

Shauna placed her backpack down and pulled out the hunting knife. She cut open the deer and a disgusting rotting smell overwhelmed the area. A few of the girls closest to the deer gagged, Javi scrunched his face and turned away. 

Shauna reached in and pulled out squirming maggots from the inside of the deer. “Oh, god” She groaned and shook her hand. 

“That normal too, Coach?” Jackie sarcastically questioned.

Leah grabbed a rag for Shauna, who quickly snatched it, wiping the gunk from her hand.

“We cannot keep fucking doing this, you guys. What happens when winter gets here? We fucking starve to death or freeze? We can’t count on getting rescued anymore. All of us know that is not gonna happen. We have to save us.” Tai yelled out, pacing around angrily.

“That’s why I’m gonna go find help. I’m leaving in the morning. Come with me if you want to get out of this fucking hellhole.” Tai yelled as she walked through the group and inside the cabin.

‘Right, her plan was to go south. Until she finds something, or until something finds her…’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat outside on the porch steps staring up at the night sky. She’d taken her blanket with her, tightly wrapped it around herself. It was too tense inside the cabin, everyone’s hope was dwindling and it was too much for Leah to deal with. 

The front door creaked open and Leah glanced back. Javi walked out and closed the door behind him. She smiled at him as he sat next to her quietly. They watched the blinking stars for a while until he rubbed his arms, getting cold in the night wind.

Leah shuffled over and placed her blanket over him, sharing the warm blanket with him. Slowly he leaned down and rested his head on her shoulder. Leah smiled slightly and tucked the blanket around him further, making sure he was properly covered.

“Thanks Leah” Javi mumbled, wrapping his arms around her. She furrowed her brows but held him nonetheless. She didn’t know what she’d done to earn his gratitude but she was glad. 

Leah held the younger boy and wondered how everything was going back home. Realistically she knew her father would be worried but a part of her wondered if he’d even notice she was gone. Leah knew her mother wouldn’t care, maybe even be glad at her disappearance. She knew Tessa would be losing her mind right now. A knot of homesickness settled in her stomach, and she couldn’t do anything to ease it.

Once again the door creaked open, she didn’t know how long they’d been out here. Leah didn’t turn to see who it was, not wanting to wake the sleeping boy in her arms. Another blanket was placed around her and Javi, she turned slightly to see who it was. The back of Laura Lee’s head was all she could see from her peripheral vision as Laura Lee walked back into the cabin and closed the door behind her.

Chapter 9: This Is Why I Don't Socialize

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah rubbed the sleep from her eyes as she walked over to where the small group were talking to each other around the campfire.

“Well, we have to do something. We’re starving. There’s nothing to hunt.” Tai argued her point in the early morning breeze.

“The animals might be migrating.” Misty added from across the unlit campfire.

“That’s probably why the only game we’ve seen for weeks was the one sick deer. And it’s just gonna keep getting colder, and not ‘I better put a coat on’ cold. We’re talking ‘dying feels like falling asleep’ cold.” Tai stressed her point to the small group gathered around.

Leah crossed her arms in front of her chest with a frown at her words.

“What do you think, Lottie?” Laura Lee gently questioned.

“I don’t know” Lottie plainly said, holding her knees from her seat, curled up on the ground.

“Look guys, anyone who wants to come with me is welcome, but I'm going.” Tai stuck to her previous words.

“You’re gonna want to take stuff with you, right? Like food and supplies? That’s not up to you” Akilah rightly complained.

“Well, you can’t just send her out there with nothing” Shauna waved her hand up in dismay.

“This is insane. We don’t know where we are, just that we’re surrounded by big-ass mountains. What are you now, Edmund fucking Hillary?” Van scoffed out.

“Who?” Mari quietly questioned and Leah tried not to smile.

“Like I said, we’re not on an island. If we go south, we’ve got to run into something eventually. A road, a town, anything.” Tai articulated again.

Nat shook her head as she spoke “No. You can’t take the rifle. I’m all for what you’re trying to do, Tai, but the gun has to stay.” Leah shuffled where she stood uncomfortably.

“Okay. Fine. I could bring some of the stuff we don’t use every day. One of the axes, the compass…” Tai trailed off, trying to think of supplies.

“There’s a flare gun in the dead guy’s plane” Jackie pointed out.

“Do not tell me that you, of all people, are on board with this.” Van skeptically asked.

“What she’s saying makes sense. I mean if she’s willing to go, then…” Jackie didn’t finish her sentence, looking around the group.

“What if you’re wrong? What if there’s just nothing?” Laura Lee asked with an unhopeful glare in her eyes.

“I don’t know” Tai shrugged

“You do know” Lottie finally looked up, and locked eyes with Tai.

“Yeah. If I’m wrong, I’ll die out there” Tai plainly stated, lacking emotion. “I’m leaving in an hour” She stated before walking into the cabin, to pack for the coming journey.

‘This is going to go absolutely horribly.’

Leah shook her head as she walked away from the group, trying to clear her head.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The group gathered around those who had agreed to go south to look for help. Leah stood on the outskirts of the group watching everyone say goodbye. She’d hugged everyone goodbye long before the rest of the team had gathered so now she opted to stand back.

“Wait! Wait for me! I’m coming.” Misty yelled out, running out the cabin.

“Ben, uh… Coach, um…Please don’t try to talk me out of this, okay? I’ve given it a lot of thought, and I just… I feel like my team really needs me right now” She stuttered out, looking up at him expectantly.

“Oh. Wow. Well, that’s, uh…” He looked around the group of girls awkwardly , who were trying not to laugh, before turning back to Misty. “You know what? That’s really brave, Misty. I’ll do the best I can without you.” 

‘Okay, what? The fuck have I been missing out on?’

“I’ll come back for you. I promise.” Misty whispered and leaned in to hug Coach Scott. Once she’d walked off to join the small group, he let out a breath of relief.

Leah didn’t know whether she was being a pessimist or not but she had a bad feeling while watching them leave.

Slowly everyone who was left, dispersed around, off doing their own thing for the day. She sighed silently watching the rest of the group go off with their friends. Leah decided to walk down to the lake, it was starting to get colder so she hoped no one else would be there.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat on the rocky shore, staring at the water glistening in the daylight. Her butt had grown numb to the uncomfortable stones beneath her and the breeze made her huddle into herself, but it was worth it.

A part of her wanted to go with the others, to find help. But her stomach ached and heart struggled at the thought of going out there. She would’ve been a nervous wreck, definitely no help to anyone. 

Another part of her gnawed at her, pulling her back to the cabin. She was stuck, stranded in the middle of nowhere and she still was too anxious to make new friends. Leah felt horrible for wishing Tessa was here too. At least then she wouldn’t be so alone.

She squinted her eyes slightly, looking out at the distant trees. She let herself get lost in her thoughts. 

Leah turned her head when she heard the rustle of branches, looking over her shoulder to the line of trees she saw Travis looking upset. She saw him stop walking once he’d seen her sitting at the water's edge. Leah turned her head back around, focusing back on the water trying to ignore his presence.

Stones crunched under his shoes as he came closer, sitting down leaving a gap between them. She glanced over at him with a small smile before letting her eyes drift back to the view of the mountains. They both sat in comfortable silence watching the clouds drift through the sky, whilst getting lost in their thoughts.

“W- What were you doing out here?” Travis questioned warily after a while, startling Leah making her turn to face him awkwardly. 

She shifted to look at her old campfire, that had long since been destroyed by the wind. No ash left inside for her to write with. She shuffled back around and looked at him apologetically. His brows were furrowed together and his lip jutted out slightly, clearly confused before he seemingly recalled something and shuffled closer to her.

He leaned over, stretching out his arm to her. She looked at him, confused. “I’ll feel what you write” He answered with a mere shrug but it shocked her that he cared enough to try to talk to her. She nodded meekly and traced the bold letters into his still arm, hoping he’d understand her.

B-O-R-E-D 

“Bored?” Travis looked over at her and Leah nodded enthusiastically which he chuckled at. She smiled and wrote on his arm again, making him focus on the feeling.

Y-O-U ?

He sighed and shook his head, brushing his hair back with his other hand. “Just, needed to get away for a while, you know?” Leah nodded assertively. She definitely understood that, sometimes the cabin just got too much to deal with.

U-N-D-E-R-S-T-A-N-D-A-B-L-E

Travis’ eyes widened at the amount of letters, clearly not catching what she’d written. Leah’s shoulder shook with silent laughter as he scoffed lightly with a smile. She tried again breaking up the word.

U-N-D-E-R

He mumbled the word looking up at her, she nodded and continued.

S-T-A-N-D

“Understand?” He questioned. Leah held up her finger to tell him to wait, with a smirk on her lips.

A-B-L-E

“Understandable, got it” Travis chuckled to himself and Leah nodded along with him.

“I have a feeling this is gonna get complicated fast” He admitted and she shrugged.

S-M-A-L-L  W-O-R-D-S

Leah paused between each word, looking up at him before leaning back down to write the rest. 

“Yeah. No long questions then, huh?” Travis joked and she rolled her eyes, nodding her head with a smile. “Okay… What’s your favourite colour?” He paused to think of a question. Leah silently laughed at how similar he and Javi were.

B-L-U-E

“Blue? Aren’t girls supposed to like, pink or something?” He mumbled but cringed as soon as he said it. “I didn’t mean it like that- I, it’s just-” Travis cut himself off with a sigh. 

He hesitantly met her eyes and she raised an eyebrow at him. Leah stuck her tongue out at him, childishly and he laughed at her lack of serious offense.

Y-O-U-R-S ?

“Huh, oh. I dunno, probably green or like yellow?” Travis shrugged but noticed that she nodded along, actually listening to him not just asking out of politeness. He smiled slightly at her before asking her another mindless question. 

For once she sat talking with a different Martinez. And what surprised her the most, was it was actually kind of nice.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah hadn’t meant to spend the whole day talking with Travis, they’d got so busy talking to each other that they hadn’t even noticed the dimming sun on the horizon. Thanks to Travis and his good memory during his hunts with Nat, they could make it back to the cabin in the fading sunlight.

She tripped on various tree roots on the way, the last one resulting in a grazed knee. She’d brushed off Travis’ concern with a smile but he insisted on guiding her through the dense forest. Holding out his hand for her to take, she gently placed her hand in his and they kept walking.

She could see the light from the campfire through the trees as they got closer to the cabin. Travis abruptly dropped her hand when he heard the girl's distant voices. Leah’s brows furrowed questioningly but she brushed it off figuring it was because the forest was clearer now that they were approaching the cabin.

As they made their way into the area surrounding the cabin, everyone sat around the campfire turned towards them. Travis awkwardly entered the cabin, ignoring the rest of the girls' gaze on him. Leah understood, the weight of all their eyes on her made her anxiety rise but she forced it down, sitting down with them around the campfire.

The girls stared at her with varying different looks on their faces, Leah looked around and met Nat’s intense look. She shakily smiled at her before looking back down into the flickering flames. The moving fire eased her nervousness. Leah hated being the center of attention, but she supposed she understood their concern, they were out pretty late without a weapon. She felt bad for making everyone, especially Nat worry again after she promised she wouldn’t.

Leah watched as Nat stood abruptly and stormed into the cabin. She gulped at her friend's obvious anger. She didn’t think she’d be that mad at her over being slightly late. Leah shifted in her seat.

“Well?” Mari nudged her with a concerned look, Leah didn’t know what she was asking so she shrugged trying to convey her confusion. Mari only scrunched her face at her. “Did you run out of paper again?” 

Leah nodded and Jackie laughed. “Not much talking then, huh?” Jackie asked with a harsh tone but Leah only shook her head, agreeing with her.

‘No shit, I can’t talk otherwise.’

Mari’s eyes widened and turned so she was facing away from Leah. And for the rest of the night none of the other girls met her eye.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The quiet inside the attic was driving Leah crazy. Her and Shauna laid in their bedrolls staring at the ceiling next to each other. The silence became too much for Shauna as she sat up suddenly looking over at Leah. She glanced over at Shauna in the moonlight.

“Want to talk about it?” Shauna bluntly whispered out.

Leah sat up and mockingly waved at her mouth. She was getting sick of people forgetting she was mute. It didn’t help her feel anything but invisible around the group.

Shauna shuffled and grabbed her journal which in the cover of night, she didn’t notice yet that it’d been moved. She ripped out a blank page from the back and handed it and her blue pen over to Leah. Shauna lit the few candles they had in the attic for lighting as Leah wrote her answer down.

Talk about what?

Shauna scoffed lightly as she read it, sitting down next to Leah. “The whole you, Nat and Travis thing” Leah scrunched her nose in confusion, she didn’t know what Travis had to do with her breaking her promise to Nat but she wrote her answer anyway.

I feel bad about upsetting Nat, she’s my only friend out here and I’m scared I’ve ruined it

Leah vented and turned the page around for Shauna to read, as soon as she started reading it Leah yanked it back and quickly wrote down an addition. 

- No offense!

Shauna laughed slightly as she read it, and looked at her with surprising kindness. “It’s fine, I know what you mean.” Leah nodded thankfully at her.

Do you think she’d forgive me if I apologized? 

Leah turned it around and her eyes shone with vulnerability.

“Honestly? I have no fucking clue” Shauna’s said sadly and Leah’s shoulders caved inwards. “I- I feel the same, with Jackie.” She confessed. Both girls looked at each other with complicated frowns. 

“Do you regret it?” She asked and Leah nodded rapidly which made Shauna sigh. “I don’t think I do. Like I never wanted to be pregnant. But I don’t think I regret Jeff… You know?” Leah tried to put herself in Shauna’s shoes, but she didn’t really know.

I think so? I’m sorry.

Shauna huffed slightly. “It’s fine, I guess. What about you? How'd you feel about it all?” She shrugged slightly and Leah crossed her legs and shuffled slightly in thought.

I should’ve just told her. But I just didn’t…

“Wait, you think you should’ve told her? No way, she'd have been pissed!” She whisper yelled as her face scrunched up. Leah shook her head.

I promised her I would.

“Wait… What?” Shauna looked as confused as Leah did “What did you promise her, Leah?”

That, if I went off on my own again, I had to tell her. I promised when you guys found me at the lake.

Shauna let out a humorless chuckle. “Leah. She’s not mad at you about that” Leah’s brows furrowed together and she fiddled with her ring nervously as she wrote.

Then why?

“For sleeping with Travis, you know, her boyfriend?” Shauna bluntly put and Leah’s eyes went wide and she wrote so quickly some of the ink on the paper smudged.

I DIDN’T SLEEP WITH HIM!!

Shauna’s jaw dropped at the clear truth. “Well, you said you didn’t do much talking together. That kinda hinted at it!” She whisper yelled at Leah.

I’M MUTE SHAUNA!

“I know that! Okay. Okay… What were you and Travis doing out there then?” She crossed her arms as she questioned Leah.

TALKING! HONEST. WE WERE AT THE LAKE

“Talking, really?” Shauna asked skeptically. 

YES! I WROTE MY ANSWERS ON HIS ARM! WE WERE ONLY TALKING!

“Fine! I believe you, stop yelling!” Shauna said defensively and Leah raised her eyebrow unimpressed.

I'M STRESSED! 

“All right, all right. This is a major fuck up.” Leah nodded and tears sprung in her eyes. “Listen, you'll just have to explain it to her, all right?” Shauna tried to reassure Leah, but it only partially worked.

Leah took a deep breath and so did Shauna. The two girls sat in uncomfortable silence until Leah finally had the courage to write again.

It’ll be fine right? For both of us?

“I hope so” Shauna closed her eyes and Leah shuffled over. They stayed up with each other the whole night, neither girl could sleep with this much anxiety running through them.

 

Chapter 10: Houston, We Have So Many Problems

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah felt she was in a never ending cycle as she ran over to Nat trying to catch up to her. Nat turned around with an icy glare. Leah suddenly felt she should’ve picked a better time to talk than right before Nat was going off to hunt. The rifle strapped around her shoulder mocked any confidence Leah once had.

Can we talk?

Leah turned the pre-written note around. Thankfully Shauna let her borrow another page of her journal so she could try and talk to Nat. “Busy” Nat scoffed out and turned trying to walk away but Leah ran in front of her, cutting her off.

I didn’t sleep with Travis.

Leah held up the blunt but truthful words and tried to convey her honesty through her eyes. Nat’s jaw clenched as she read it and nodded snarkily.

“Right…” She trailed off, her tone just as sharp as before. Leah’s eyes watered but she held back her tears. She quickly wrote her truth, glancing up to make sure Nat didn’t walk away.

I wouldn’t do that to you - to anyone - but especially you. You're the only friend I have, Nat. I promise you, I didn’t sleep with him. I didn’t kiss him. I didn’t do anything other than talk, like I would with anyone else. I promise.

Leah handed the note over to Nat who rolled her eyes but read it anyway. She pushed the paper back into Leah’s hands and stood up straight looking Leah in her eyes.

“Then, why couldn’t you look me in the eyes when you came back” She articulated every word and Leah knew Nat was as upset as Leah was.

I broke our promise. I thought that’s why you were mad at me.

That broke Nat out of whatever angry hold she was previously in. “What?” She questioned, her usual tone shining through making Leah’s tears fall down her face.

At the lake. I promised I wouldn’t leave without telling you. I left to the lake and didn’t tell you

“Jesus, Leah. I meant if you stayed overnight. Not during the day.” Nat’s eyes were wide but Leah knew she’d been forgiven.

Oh. I’m sorry.

“Fuck.” Nat said, letting out a long breath. 

Are we good?

“Yeah, yeah we’re good” She whispered her words but Nat meant them. Leah smiled slightly and rushed forward to hug her, making sure to dodge the rifle on her back.

Eventually after standing around for a bit, Nat left to hunt alone and Leah waved her off. She walked back towards the front of the cabin, looking for something to do.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah was sitting in the attic when she heard it. She hadn’t meant to eavesdrop on Nat and Travis, she'd originally been folding her and Shauna’s clean clothes and putting them away but then she’d heard them talking, loudly… She heard their whole argument about Bobby fucking Farleigh of all people.

Leah knew Bobby Farleigh, not very well. He’d helped her with a creep on the baseball team who kept trying to kiss her after soccer practice, saying ‘she only had to say no for him to stop’. Bobby was still at school then, it was his senior year. He’d beaten the guy so badly, Leah wasn’t sure the guy’s nose ever looked the same.

She always remembered it because he hadn’t done it to impress her. He actually completely brushed her off, telling her ‘it was nothing’. He’d gone so far as to walk her to the end of her block. Even though she knew he lived miles on the other side of town. Leah knew he was a troublemaker, his reputation wasn’t clean or slanderous but she was kind to anyone who was kind to her.

But whatever a guy like Bobby had done to piss off a guy like Travis, Leah didn’t know but she knew Bobby would probably be in the wrong for it. And by everything she heard between Nat and Travis, Nat thought so too.

The cabin door slammed shut and Nat yelled out, who Leah assumed was Travis stomped around the cabin.

“Was it you?” Leah didn’t want to risk looking to see who Nat was talking about. She already felt bad about listening to their argument.

“Right. Fuck you, Jackie!” Leah assumed Nat stormed off, not hearing the cabin door open again.

‘Holy shit, Jackie what the actual fuck’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat far away from Jackie on the porch. The group was bored, sitting around with hunger in their stomachs, gnawing at them. They’d been out there all morning, Leah sat watching the trees sway in the breeze.

“Oh, my god. What happened? Where are Van and Tai?” Jackie shot out of her chair. Leah turned as saw Misty, Mari and Akilah completely exhausted and out of breath.

Leah and Travis rushed over to help Mari who collapsed to her knees while Javi and a few other girls helped Akilah. Misty kept walking, Jackie pulled her to sit down in front of the porch.

“She… She told… She told us to leave them. We had to get help.” Misty whispered between painted breaths. 

Laura Lee knelt in front of her and held onto Misty’s shoulders. “Show us which way to go” Misty only mutely nodded.

The group walked looking for Van and Tai all day, and through nightfall. The rest of the girls were yelling out for the two girls while Leah silently walked with them, looking like the rest of them.

“Are you sure you came this way?” Laura Lee asked. “I don’t know. I- I can’t see anything. It’s so dark” Misty stuttered holding up the lantern to look around again.

The group looked around the area when a flare went off in the distance. “It’s them” Laura Lee muttered and everyone went running towards where it’d come from.

They found Tai and Van huddled on the ground. Van was crudely bandaged and bleeding while Tai held onto her. Shauna and Laura Lee helped Van walk while Leah and Misty helped up Tai. It was a long walk back to the cabin…

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat on Coach Scott’s bed with Javi, the pain filled screams and cries from Van being stitched back together were muffled by the door and walls but not enough to completely block them out. 

She held Javi close to her, letting his head rest against her chest. She placed one of her hands over his ear, hoping her racing heart beat would be loud enough to block the noise for the younger boy. Her other hand shakily raked through his hair, hoping to sooth him from the chaos outside the room.

‘It would be a really bad thing to think but, I knew it. Going south was a shitty plan. Poor Van, she doesn't deserve this.’

Eventually the gut wrenching noises faded. Leah knew it was over by the muttering outside the door. Neither her or Javi had the desire to leave the room, or even leave from their huddled position. Leah shuffled down slightly, pulling the blanket over her and Javi. 

A little while later Coach Scott came back into his room, with a distraught look in his eyes from the makeshift medical procedure he’d witnessed. He quietly dragged the chair in the corner of the room outside. He shuffled back into the room with the rest of the girls and drifted off to sleep in the old wooden chair, letting Leah and Javi rest where they were.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat outside next to the unlit campfire, next to Javi. Travis sat opposite them, looking away and into the outer forest. A banging sound from inside the cabin echoed through the open front door and the three of them walked to the doorway to see what was happening inside.

The rest of the girls groaned as they were abruptly woken from their sleep. 

“Thank you.” Laura Lee whispered as she stood in front of everyone. “In light of the expedition ending as it did, I have decided that I’m going to take the dead guy’s plane and fly south. I’m going to find us help, and I’m going to get us out of here.” She informed the group of her plan.

“You’re going to fly?” Lottie squinted at Laura Lee questioningly.

“But y-you don’t know how.” Nat said as she sat up in her bedroll.

“I’ve been studying the flight manual for weeks, and I checked the gas tank. It’s full. I used to watch my grandpa fly. He even let me steer a few times. I know that I can do this.” Laura Lee affirmed as Tai and Shauna came down from the attic. 

Tai rushed over to Van who was lying still passed out from pain. Shauna leaned against the corner wall looking concerned at Laura Lee. Leah crossed her arms from the porch.

“You can’t deny that Van needs serious medical attention.” Laura Lee pointed to Van, where Tai looked over at her defensively.

“She’s not the only one. Shauna. Tell them.” Jackie spoke up and Leah’s eyes widened.

“I-I really don’t…” Shauna started but Jackie cut her off. “Tell them.” She said sternly.

Leah and Tai shared a worried look before Tai focused on Shauna while Leah looked over at Jackie and her smug face. 

‘She knows, there’s no way Shauna told her but Jackie definitely knows about Jeff’

“I’m-I’m pregnant” Shauna confessed and the rest of the group freaked out. Leah sighed silently, staring at Jackie who ignored Leah’s intense gaze.

“You were having sex?” Akilah gasped out.

“How far along are you?” Misty said as she rushed over to Shauna’s side.

“Wait, did you get knocked up here?” Mari questioned.

“No, I…” Jackie cut off Shauna once again “It doesn’t doesn’t matter when it happened. Okay? It just matters that we get them both help.” Leah narrowed her eyes at Jackie’s ‘nice girl’ tone.

Misty’s poking hand was wacked away from Shauna who looked beyond upset at the whole situation.

“All right. Can everyone just… Laura Lee… you can’t do this. No. I- It’s not even close to safe.” Coach Scott rambled as he held onto his crutch.

“There is no ‘safe’ anymore, Coach Scott. It’s going to be winter soon. If we don’t do this, we’re… We’re all going to fucking starve.” Laura Lee proclaimed and Coach Scott distraughtly leaned to hold into the mantle of the fireplace.

“All right, well, I’m still the only adult here, so… no. I’m not going to let you do it.” He blurted out.

Laura Lee stepped forward “What are you gonna do to stop me, Coach?” She said determinedly. Leah looked at her wide eyed while the rest of the group looked over at Coach, as if he’d do anything.

‘We really need this to go well…’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah and Lottie knelt on the top of the wings of the small plane. The rest of the group were chopping down small trees to make a runway. Leah was throwing down vines and fallen branches onto the ground below while Lottie was pushing off the large amounts of moss that attached itself to the wing.

Once the wings were cleared they carefully climbed back down. Lottie went off to help the rest of the group clear the path while Leah opted to go back to the cabin with Laura Lee to help her pack her bag.

The blonde pair walked off in silence to the cabin. Leah sat next to Laura Lee as she packed her things and grabbed her worn teddy bear. Leah closed the cabin door behind her and they started walking back to the plane. 

Leah tapped Laura Lee, who turned with a fixed smile. Leah hugged her tightly and tried to express her emotion within the hug. The pair kept walking towards the plane in silence.

The rest of the group was gathered around the plane, waiting for them to arrive. Leah stood a bit behind as she watched Laura Lee walk towards their only hope. 

Travis side hugged her as she walked forward, giving Laura Lee a comforting glance before letting her go. Laura Lee hugged Akilah, then Jackie, then the rest gathered for a group hug. Leah stood next to Nat as Laura Lee hopped up into the plane and Coach Scott grabbed the plane’s door.

“For God’s sake, Laura Lee, please. Don’t do this.” He pleaded with her and she nodded at him.

“Thanks for worrying about me, Coach, but… this is my purpose.” She said sincerely and shut the plane door. 

The group backed away from the plane and it clankingly roared to life. The propellers spun, slowly getting faster. The plane inched forward. Mari and a few others cheered as the plane went past. They all watched in awe as the plane took off, no longer touching the ground.

“Oh my god. She’s doing it!” Jackie yelled out and the group ran towards the lake, watching and cheering as the plane flew in the blue sky.

Leah stood near the back of the group with wide eyes at the sight of the plane.

“Is that smoke?” Jackie questioned loudly and Leah squinted to look at the plane.

‘Holy shit, that’s smoke.’

The group's grins shifted to looks of concern as smoke rose from the plane. Suddenly the entire plane exploded in the sky. Jackie screamed in fright and Lottie ran into the lake in shock.

Leah watched through tear filled eyes as what was left of the plane fell into the water. Their only hope for surviving the coming winter went up in literal ashes. Leah focused on the smoke cloud in the sky fade slowly into the breeze.

‘Tomorrow it’ll look like the plane was never even there...’

 

Chapter 11: I Am Completely Lost

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah pretended the cooked bugs in her cup were just little french fries. It wasn’t working very well. 

“Jackie, you have to eat” Shauna whispered to Jackie but with the lack of noise everyone else heard it. “Why? What does it matter, at this point?” Jackie said defeatedly.

“Okay, I-I can’t do this anymore” Mari said as she placed her cup down and walked into the pantry.

Leah watched with furrowed brows as Mari walked back holding a sealed jar. “What is that?” Coach Scott asked from his seat near the fireplace.

“It was so berries. I was trying to save, but… I think it might’ve turned into booze? I don’t know about the rest of you, but I could use a drink” Mari informed with a sad smirk, whilst trying to open the jar.

“Do we think it’s safe?” Tai questioned. “Do we care?” Coach Scott shrugged.

‘No, no we do not’

“I have a few more” Mari said and Jackie spoke up. “If we have booze, let’s have a party.” 

“Yeah. ‘Cause we’ve got so much to celebrate.” Tai objected.

“Do we need a reason? We’re gonna be dead in a few weeks.” Jackie whispered snarkily. Leah shuffled nervously on the ground where she sat next to Shauna and Javi.

“There’s a full moon tomorrow night.” Misty pointed out. “And it’s almost homecoming” Akilah added with a sad look around the group.

“We packed dresses, right? For the awards dinner?” Lottie said deadpanned from her seat by the door.

“There we go. We have dresses, we have booze. We can decorate. Have a sort of… moon homecoming.” Jackie suggested. Leah crossed her arms and looked around the group.

‘I didn’t even want to go to our normal homecoming’

“More like a doom homecoming.” Tai half-joked. Leah watched as Van stormed off to the other room making Tai frown.

“A doom-coming” Lottie said and Nat laughed from her chair. “Now that’s a party idea” Nat smiled pointed over at Lottie.

“Yeah. All right. Doom-coming. Tomorrow night, we’ll drink rotten berries and celebrate our impending death.” Jackie smiled slightly despite her monotone voice.

‘It might not be that bad, then…’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah and Mari sat next to each other on the porch with a few other girls, making any final decorations they could think of. Even though Leah didn’t have any paper to talk to Mari and the small group around them. Mari added Leah into the conversation by asking her questions she could answer with a head shake or nod. It wasn’t a lot but it meant the world to Leah. For the first time in weeks Leah smiled genuinely.

“Right, Leah?” Mari looked over her shoulder with a smile and Leah nodded at the question of whether or not they should have streamers at the entrance of the party.

“Okay, well we can use old shirts that are too ripped to wear anymore.” Akilah pondered and Mari nodded.

“Yeah, we can add feathers to the ends if we don’t have enough, right?” Mari looked at Leah again with a smile and Leah nodded assuringly. 

“Leah!” Nat yelled out and waved her over. Leah turned and smiled goodbye to Mari and ran after Nat who had walked around the back of the cabin.

Nat turned and looked at Leah’s empty hands questioningly. “Don’t you want to grab your makeup?” Leah looked at Nat nervously and winced slightly. “You didn’t bring any? Oh my god, who raised you?” Nat chuckled  and Leah smiled awkwardly.

They’d placed the dresser outside when they’d first found the cabin, there were too many ‘ghost sightings’ in the mirror late at night. Nat placed her makeup next to where various other girls' makeup was placed before them. Leah stood behind Nat watching her through the mirror and started applying her eyeliner. 

Once Nat was finished with her own makeup she shuffled to the side to let Leah closer. Leah looked down at the different kinds of makeup left on the dresser. She grabbed a random eyeshadow palette and looked at all the different colours.

“What color's your dress?” Nat asked, looking between Leah and the palette. Leah pursed her lips and shuffled between the different palettes on the dresser, before picking up one and pointed at the light blue colour. 

Nat nodded and took the palette from Leah’s hands, stepping closer to her. “Close your eyes, or I’m gonna poke your eye out.” Nat joked and Leah quickly followed her orders. Leah didn’t know what Nat was doing to her face but she followed her instructions and trusted her. 

“Okay, go on. Have a look at my masterpiece.” Nat smiled and Leah turned to look in the mirror. 

‘Holy shit. I wish we had a camera right now.’

Leah smiled widely and glanced over at Nat who jokingly shrugged her shoulders. Nat decided to touch up her lip gloss that she’d smudged in her concentrated state. 

“Wait. That’s not how you do it.” Travis said walking over to Javi who was trying to probably tie his dress tie. Leah felt a bit bad not even realising Javi had wandered over near them. Both her and Nat watched as Travis helped his younger brother. Nat walked off, as Leah grabbed a random eyeshadow palette and walked over to the two boys.

Travis watched as Nat left and turned back to Javi, finishing off the tie. Leah smiled at Javi who looked down trying to memorize his brother's actions. Javi patted the tie once it was finished and Travis watched Leah with curious eyes as Leah opened the eyeshadow palette and wrote in a dark shade on her arm.

Handsome!

She turned her arm towards Javi who smiled shyly. “Thanks Leah” He mumbled and Leah smiled at the younger boy’s blush. Travis watched the interaction with a smile and for a moment he forgot about Nat and their argument. Travis chuckled as Leah tried fixing Javi’s hair like a fretting mother would.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Let the doom-coming begin” Lottie said loudly and nodded to Javi who banged a metal scrap they’d handed to a low down branch.

Leah watched as the rest of the group slowly made their way into the cleared area and all stood around the campfire.

“Are they?” Mari whispered as she watched Tai and Van huddled close to each other.

“Duh” Akilah whispered back with a smile as Tai and Van kissed each other. Everyone smiled and cheered at the couple.

Everyone spread out around the clearing, getting their bowls of stew and cups of rotten berry alcohol. Thankfully the stew wasn’t as bad as the berries tasted.

“Stop” Lottie said and everyone turned to her.

“What’s wrong?” Van questioned and Leah looked over at Lottie.

“We should have a moment of silence for Laura Lee.” Lottie sadly answered.

“Yeah” Coach Scott agreed and the group fell into silence.

“To Laura Lee” Tai put her drink in the air and the others followed.

Lottie sat down next to the fire. “So, what now?” Nat questioned

“Oh, now we just need a DJ to pump up the volume” Jackie joked and a few girls laughed.

“What we need is a slow dance.” Misty said, looking over at Coach Scott.

Lottie started humming and slowly the rest of the girls began singing and dancing between laughs. Leah's shoulders shook with laughter as she watched the girls dance around. She watched as Misty went over and danced with Javi, making Leah smile.

Her smile dimmed as she watched Jackie pull Travis into a slow dance and saw Nat walking away with Coach not far behind her. Leah sighed and realised Nat and Travis could ironically, not physically talk to each other about their problems.

‘Not good. Definitely not good. This is gonna be so much work to fix.’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Van’s laughter echoed loudly through the forest. “Oh my god. What?” Tai questioned her

“No, no. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I'm sorry. You look like a tree. Like a really hot tree.” Van and Tai burst out laughing and Leah looked over at them with squinted eyes.

“Guys, doesn’t Tai look like a tree right now?” Van asked the rest of the group through fits of giggles.

“She kind of does.” Akilah muttered, tilting her head looking at Tai. “Or do the trees look like Taissa?” Mari looked around at the trees and the girls giggled again.

‘What. The. Fuck. Is. Going. On’

“I feel weird” Javi said from where he laid on the ground, looking up at the sky. Leah looked over at him curiously. 

‘Weird is a understatement, kid’

Leah watched from where she sat leaning against a tree, as Misty got up and walked off.

“Shh. Do you feel that?” Lottie asked and Leah furrowed her brows at her.

“I think I do” Van said and Akilah knelt to the ground. “Like energy…” Akilah whispered, patting the dirt. 

“Coming up from the ground.” Van continued looking down at her hands. “Something’s coming” Van said, looking wide eyed.

Shauna gasped holding her belly and stepped backwards. “What’s wrong?” Tai let go of the plant she was holding and staggered over to Shauna. Leah felt like she was getting whiplash from the rate everyone was talking.

“It… It moved” Shauna whispered and Tai knelt in front of her, placing her ear to Shauna's stomach.

‘That’s creepy’

“You guys… something’s happening.” Tai said as she rubbed Shauna's stomach.

“No. Something’s coming.” Lottie muttered and knelt in front of an old tree stump. “We won’t be hungry much longer” Lottie said ominously and Leah’s eyes went wide.

Leah stood up wobbly and started walking away from the group, she briefly looked behind her and saw Javi still lying there. She nodded to herself.

‘He’ll be fine with the girls around’

Leah couldn’t understand how far she’d been walking, it felt like a few minutes and hours all at once. She looked behind her and realized she was further than she’d thought. Her brain hurt in a way that made it feel fuzzy. Leah knelt on the ground where she was standing and hugged her knees. 

‘Urgh. I knew homecoming’s are never fun’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah watched the moon dance around in the sky. She’d given up on trying to find the cabin and was busy watching the shifting sky. The stars moved into pretty pictures and she’d forgotten about the cold night breeze. She turned her head at the sound of howling and screaming. The girls, her mind supplied the answers. 

Leah got up and wiped her dress as she started walking towards the noise. She abruptly stopped when she heard growling and snarls that weren’t human at all. 

‘Fuck’

Leah turned back around and used every soccer practice to use and sprinted away through the dense forest. She heard thumping behind her and she didn’t know what noises were in her mind or in reality. 

The night had grown darker, making it harder to see. Leah tripped over a tree root and she fell hard into the ground. A claw raced forward and dug into her upper arm. Leah scrunched her face in pain and she yanked her arm away, and held it close to her chest.

She pushed herself up with her other arm and staggered to another sprint but it didn’t last long. Another swipe hit her opposite thigh but she kept standing, putting her weight on her other leg. She looked around and couldn’t see where the attack was coming from. Leah jogged towards the nearest tree and struggled her way up the branches. 

A grey wolf jumped for her, barely missing her ankle as she pulled herself up another branch. She kept climbing until her arm gave out. The blood from her arm pooled down spilling all over her dress and the side of the bark she leaned against. Her bloody leg hung off the branch, dripping blood down to the ground.

It wasn’t until the wolves stopped clawing at the bottom of the tree and wandered off to another prey to hunt that Leah cried until she was too tired to anymore.

‘I wanna go home’

All that was heard from deep in the forest was Leah’s small sniffles.

 

Chapter 12: 2 Girls 1 Mistake 1 Death

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah silently groaned when the morning sunlight washed over the forest. She knew she couldn’t stay where she was but the pain searing in her arm and leg stopped her. Leah sat for a few moments before leaning forward getting ready to shuffle down the tree. Pain shot through her arm as she lowered herself down another branch. Her feet tapped the next branch below her but her wounded leg buckled under her weight. 

Leah tried to grab the branch as she fell but all it resulted in was her arm banging against the harsh tree bark. She fell onto the ground, landing on a large root. Her back shot through with sharp pain and the air was knocked from her lungs. Her vision blurred from the pain jolting her arm and leg. Her face rested uncomfortably against the dirt as she tried to breathe properly again. Leah’s vision darken with black spots that grew larger the longer she tried to keep her eyes awake. Eventually she succumbed to the grasps of unconsciousness.

“Javi!” Travis called out, cupping his hands to echo over the tall trees.

Leah winced as she came to, the light hurt her eyes and her head pounded painfully. Leah closed her eyes again, dropping her head against the dirt. Her body felt like it was burning hot, but she felt numb to any pain in her limbs.

“Javi!” Travis’ voice yelled out and Leah squinted her eyes.

She used the last of her energy to roll over to lay on her back which ached from her fall. Leah turned her head, a sharp pain shot down her spine as she did but she saw a small twig next to her. She outstretched her good hand and snapped it with her dwindling energy. 

“Javi?” Travis’ voice sounded closer and Leah’s heart beat faster. She threw the broken twig at the tree hoping it made a noise. Leah saw the shuffle of leaves and Travis appeared. 

“Holy shit” He muttered and knelt next to her. Leah’s eyes fluttered shut, her adrenaline was fading now that she’d been found. Travis’ hand’s cupped her face, coaxing her awake.

“Was Javi with you?” Travis questioned quickly with utter concern and Leah’s dazed eyes met his. She shook her head, no. He sighed a short breath of relief.

“Okay, okay. I-” He ran a hand through his hair, clearly stressed out by the state of her injuries.

Travis tried to help her up but she buckled, without any strength left in her to stand. He gripped her waist tight and grabbed her non-injured leg and pulled her closer to him. He huffed and pulled her into a bridal carry. Leah’s head lolled against his shoulder. Her blood stained his clothes and her tears wet his shoulder.

He began walking back to the cabin. Each step he took made pain serge through her. Her brain felt foggy in a different way than before, it spiked her anxiety for a reason she couldn’t place. Leah looked up at Travis with a wobbling lip. 

“Tra- vis” Leah’s voice croaked as she spoke for the first time in her entire life. Travis looked down at her with wide eyes at the sound of her voice. He began jogging as fast as he could while carrying her back to the cabin when he saw her eyes close.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Oh my god!” Akilah said as she looked up and saw Travis carrying a very bloody Leah. 

Everyone turned to look and rose from their seats around the campfire. Travis walked past them and entered the cabin. Misty ran inside after him and pushed the candles and mugs off the table letting Travis lay Leah down. The group entered the cabin and Misty barked out orders.

Tai and Van exited the attic and saw Leah and her blood soaking the table and floor. Van quickly turned and rushed back upstairs, unable to witness the familiar sight. 

“I need you to help me” Misty looked over at Tai who stood wide eyed in the doorway. “You’ve already done it before” Tai gulped but nodded and passed the makeshift equipment.

Leah opened her eyes and saw the cabin roof. She saw Misty and Tai tying their makeshift needles and she knew what was about to happen. Travis squeezed her good hand and she looked over at him, surprised he was still here.

She took a deep breath as she saw Misty and Tai share a look and the stitching of her arm and her thigh began. Her face scrunched in pain and her heart thumped so fast, it hurt each time it beat.

Leah tried to focus on anything else than the tugging and poking of her skin. She thought of memories, the good and the bad. But each time she was brought back to the nauseating feeling of being sewn back together. Leah tried to remember other times she’d been in pain, to try and overcome the kind she felt now. But nothing from her past could amount to this. Tears streamed down her cheeks and she felt her chin wobbly but still no sound fell from her lips. 

Leah wondered how much more it would take for her to black out. She craved the peace it would bring, even for a moment. But it never came. She felt the tugging and the burning pain. Until Travis squeezed her hand once more. Leah focused on the feeling, she held his hand tight, never once letting go. It was as if she was in a dark tunnel and finally she found a flashlight leading her out of the shadows. 

Leah focused on the warmth his hand gave her. It burned her in a different kind of way from her wounds. It burned her because deep down she knew Nat was watching from the other side of the cabin and Leah didn’t have the strength in her to let go of his hand.

Finally she knew it was over and she let out a silent sigh, she closed her eyes with relief and she looked over at Misty and Tai who were finishing wrapping her injuries. Leah looked over at the rest of the group who were looking more distraught than she did, which even with her dazed eyes she smiled at. 

Her eyes grew tired like she’d been awake for weeks. She turned her head once more looking over at Travis who’d pulled up a chair and was sitting next to her, still holding her hand. Leah faded off to sleep, with the tingling pain and one hell of a headache.

“Holy shit. That was crazy” Mari muttered with wide eyes at Leah’s silence and stoicism.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“Just shut up!” Shauna screamed and Leah stirred away, she glanced over and saw Jackie and Shauna standing and glaring at each other whilst the group looked between them.

“None of this would have happened if it wasn’t for you. If you hadn’t…” Shauna was trailed off as she stormed over in front of Jackie.

“Hadn’t what? Huh? Stolen him? Wow. The irony.” Jackie laughed humorlessly. 

“Shauna was fucking Jeff behind my back, you know that?” Jackie glanced around the group. “Yeah. That’s who’s really responsible for her little bundle of joy.” Tears filled both girls' eyes.

“It was you. You read my journal.” Shauna muttered out.

“How could you? You were my best friend. You-you-you don’t even like him” Jackie stuttered out.

“And how would you know? You’re so obsessed with yourself, I’m surprised you’re aware other people even exist. You know you never even asked me if I wanted to go to Rutgers? You just assumed I’d go wherever you wanted. You tell me what to wear, what to do, who to hook up with. I don’t even like soccer! But you just get everything you want. All the time like it’s nothing. And the rest of us, we’re just extras in the movie of your fucking life.” Shauna ranted and Leah closed her eyes briefly letting herself listen without the pain from the light hitting her eyes.

“Oh, my god, you’re such a cliche. Oh, is the, is the sad little sidekick mad? Did I force you to live in my shadow, Shauna? It must be hard being this jealous all the time.” Jackie scoffed and Shauna laughed.

“What? You’re so fucking jealous of me, you can barely breathe” Jackie affirmed.

“Are you quoting Beaches at me right now?” Shauna asked in disbelief and Leah opened her eyes to watch the two, unfortunately very entertained.

“What? No.” Jackie said unconvincingly.

“I’m not jealous of you, Jackie. I feel sorry for you. Because you’re weak. And I think deep down, you know it. I’m sure everyone back home is so fucking sad to be losing their perfect little princess, but they’ll never know how tragic and boring and insecure you really are. Or how high school was the best your life was ever gonna get.” Shauna snarked.

“Fuck you” Jackie whispered. “That’s it. You know what? That’s it. Get-get out. Go on, get out!” Jackie yelled as she pointed at the front door and nudged Shauna’s shoulder. Leah silently winced at the loudness.

“No.” Shauna said.

“I can’t be around you, I-I can’t even fucking look at you right now.” Jackie insisted.

“Well, that sounds like your problem. So maybe you should leave.” Shauna said seriously and Jackie scoffed looking at the rest of the team for help.

Leah tried to turn towards her, knowing how cold the previous night had been, it was only going to get colder the longer the days went on. Pain shot through her arm and she mutely huffed with tears in her eyes.

“Maybe you’d be better off, since we’re all so crazy” Mari sassed, Leah didn’t know what she was talking about. 

‘Clearly I’ve missed a lot’

“Okay, everybody just stop. Nobody is going outside.” Coach Scott tried to intervene but Lottie interrupted him.

“Stay out of it, Coach” Lottie said sternly.

“You know what? Fine.” Jackie walked over to where her things were.

“Jackie, come on. Don’t go outside.” Tai tried to coax Jackie into staying and Leah thanked her silently.

“Don’t pretend like this isn’t what you wanted the entire fucking time.” Jackie lashed out at Tai then turned to look at Shauna. “I don’t even know who you are anymore.” Jackie frowned as she spoke.

“Or maybe you never did.” Shauna answered and Jackie slammed the front door shut with her things in her hand.

The room went quiet for a while after that, Leah wanted to stay awake for Shauna’s sake but she knew she wouldn’t be much help. The flickering of the fire and the quietness of the cabin eased Leah to a dreamless sleep.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah woke up to the cold. She turned and saw the group exiting the cabin.

“Jackie!” Shauna screamed and Leah struggled to sit up. Her body felt groggy and riddled with fatigue. Nat looked behind her and locked eyes with Leah, rushing over to her to help her sit up.

Leah looked at her with questioning eyes and Nat understood her silent question.

“It snowed overnight.” Nat whispered and for a moment Leah didn’t understand until she heard Shauna’s guttural scream. 

‘Oh god, Jackie…’

Leah’s eyes went wide and Nat nodded. “She’s dead” Nat whispered extra quietly with a sad look in her eyes. Leah looked down and closed her eyes. 

Leah’s head snapped up to Nat’s with frenzied eyes. “What?” Nat questioned looking at Leah’s patched up wounds. Leah shook her head and pointed over at a duffle bag in the corner of the room.

‘Javi. Where is Javi?’

“We couldn’t find him…” She trailed off and Leah furrowed her eyebrows from pain and tried to stand up. 

“Leah, for fuck sake sit down.” Nat tried to push her back onto the table she was laying on but Leah shook her head and tears filled her eyes.

“I promise I’ll go looking, okay? Just sit the fuck down” Nat looked into her eyes and Leah believed her. Sighing to herself and fell back against the wooden table. Closing her eyes and breathed heavily through the nagging pain in her body.

‘We can’t lose two people in one fucking day, that’s not fair…’

 

Notes:

Act One (Season One) coming to a close!
Thank you all for the comments and kudos! I appreciate it 🩷

Next up, Act Two (Season Two)!

Chapter 13: ACT TWO

 

'SEASON TWO'

 

 

 

Something in the orange - Zach Bryan

 

Your voice only trembles when you try to speak

To you I’m just a man to me you’re all I am

 

 

 

No Time To Die - Billie Eilish

 

Was it obvious to everybody else? That I’d fallen for a lie?

You’re no longer my concern, another lesson yet to learn

 

 

 

Which Witch - Florence and The Machine

 

I’m not beaten by this yet, you can’t tell me to regret

And it’s my whole heart, while tried and tested it’s mine

 

 

 

 

 

Bottom of the River - Delta Rae

 

The wolves will chase you by the pale moonlight, Drunk and driven by a devil's hunger

The Lord's gonna come for your first born son, into the water let it pull him under

 

 

 

Fourth of July - Sufjan Stevens

 

Did you get enough love, my little dove?

Before I say goodbye, my star in the sky. Shall we look at the moon?

 

 

 

Take Me To Church - Hozier

 

She demands a sacrifice, that’s a fine looking high horse.

In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene, only then I am human.

 

 

 

 

 

R.I.P To My Youth - The Neighbourhood

 

I'd like to be proud but somehow I'm ashamed, What do I do? What do I do?

I gotta be honest I don't know if I can take it, Put me in the dirt let me be with the stars

 

 

 

Outrunning Karma - Alec Benjamin

 

He's never gonna make it, Poor people he's forsaken

It's just a game of waiting, There's really no escaping till he dies

 

 

 

Hurts Like Hell - Fleurie

 

How can I put it down into words? When it's almost too much for my soul alone

I loved and I loved and I lost you

 

Chapter 14: Lovely Distractions

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah felt someone nudge her awake. She scrunched her face up at being woken up but sat up nonetheless. Travis knelt next to her with a shaky breath. Leah leaned against the cabin wall behind her and Travis shuffled to sit next to her, letting their arms press against each other. A silent reminder that he was awake. 

It had become a night time ritual for Travis to wake up sporadically through the night. Nightmares plagued him since doomcoming but when winter came and he couldn’t escape the small cabin it had gotten more frequent. During one of the early winter nights Leah had stayed up to watch the moon through the foggy window, missing not being able to see the stars as easily anymore. Travis had woken from another bad dream and Leah had silently watched as he collected himself. They’d stayed up through the night and talked. It had become a ritual for the two, even now, two months later.

Won’t be long till morning

Leah traced the words into Travis’ arm, he nodded understanding the shortened code they’d made to talk to each other easier. He looked out the window and sighed at the constant falling snow. Leah frowned slightly and pushed his sleeve up once again to write down her words.

We’ll find him

Travis’ glossy met hers. “When?” He whispered and his voice broke slightly. Leah pursed her lips and softly shook her head.

I don’t know but we will find him

She squeezed his hand afterwards and he nodded, seeing the determination in her eyes. 

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

No matter how much clothing they put on or the amount of magazines they stuffed their jackets with, nothing could prepare Leah for the winter cold outside the cabin. She’d fully recovered from her run in with the local wildlife and with gravity, but she had odd days when it still ached as if it’d just happened. She won’t let that stop her though it did slow her down slightly, she still went out into the snow to help look for Javi.

Leah never pretended to the group or to Nat, she wasn’t joining to help hunt, she was purely looking for Javi. At first Nat had objected to Leah joining them, originally Leah had thought it was because Nat was trying to look out for her but after a while she realized Nat just didn’t want her coming along with them. That hurt more than she’d care to admit but Leah tried to brush it off. She wouldn’t stay in the cozy little cabin while Javi was out there alone. It would have driven her crazy and eventually Nat realized that, when Leah wouldn’t let it go.

At least Travis was grateful for having someone else out looking for his brother. He never mentioned it during their late night talks but it meant more to him than he cared to admit when Leah would bug Nat to stay out a little longer each day.

Things have been tense between Nat and Travis since doomcoming and Leah only knew about the small parts Travis shared with her during their nightly talks. She’d tried her hardest to get them closer together again but when she tried the last time, about a month back, Nat had blown up on her telling her to butt out of it. Travis had thanked her later that night but shrugged it off. It seemed neither of them were keen on reconciling. Eventually they’ve come to a distant friend and Leah couldn’t help but feel proud of her work.

The sun still had yet to come up, Lottie sat waiting for them. She smeared ash on the palm of each of their hands before they put their gloves back on. She lit a makeshift incense and waved the smoke over them, Leah tried not to show her holding her breath. Lottie pricked her finger and dipped the droplets of blood in a cup of warm tea. 

“It’s not like this Wicca bullshit’s doing us any good” Nat whispered looking over at Travis who held out the cup to her.

“Well, you keep coming back alive, don’t you?” Lottie rebutted and Nat sighed, taking a sip of the blood infused tea. 

Nat handed the tea forcefully over to Leah who swiftly took a sip, passing it over to Travis. After his sip he looked over at Lottie. 

“Thanks Lott.” He shallowly smiled, gratefully at her.

‘Just play circus with the dancing-tightrope walking monkeys for a while. Just don’t piss them off. Especially if they had creepy voo-doo magic.’

The three walked out the cabin and into the harsh winter snow, leaving Lottie behind to watch from the cabin window.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah split off from Travis and Nat opting to go the opposite way than them, she was only slowing them down from the lingering pain in her body. Nat tried to argue with her, seeing as she didn’t have a weapon but she didn’t mind, the more ground they covered the more likely they’d find Javi.

She nodded at Nat, a silent promise to return to the rendezvous point on time and she walked in the opposite direction as the pair.

A small part of her thought about Jackie, how her frozen body still lies in the shack behind the cabin. She thought about how the cold bites and wraps it way around her. She thought about the last time she saw Javi, how she’d left him there in her intoxicated state. Grief and blame settles in her stomach like a hard rock that she couldn’t claw out. The thought rings in her head like a taunting bell.

‘It’s my fault he’s dead’

She wouldn’t listen. She couldn’t, Javi was just a kid and she had to find him. If she listened, if she stopped looking she’d have to deal with the fact that she left him to die. Leah kept walking despite the pain jolting her every step. One way or another. She’d find that kid.

Her legs ached at the weight of the snow under them as she walked but she pushed on. She still had more time before the sun got close to setting. Her breath puffed out in front of her once she got to the high point of the mountain. She saw no signs of life around her. She turned back around and started walking back to the rendezvous point with a frown.

Leah saw Nat and Travis waiting for her, Travis was looking down at the snow with a distant look. Nat turned and walked over towards her.

“We found another dead fox.” Nat muttered, Leah nodded in response. Nat walked off and Travis and Leah slowly followed behind her.

That’d be the fourth dead animal they’d found this month and each time Travis spiraled. His nightmare got worse, to the point where he just ended up staying up through the night. When he was awake he’d suffer panic attacks, all while trying to hide it from the rest of the group. His brain was fighting against him and Leah knew all too well what that was like.

Leah didn’t mind staying up with him during the sleepless nights, tracing stories on his arm with their secret code they’d made together. She didn’t blame him when they’d hide away during odd times during the day to soothe his panicked breathing and racing mind. Leah certainly never judged him when he never once judged her for all her sobbing when she realized she’d left Javi behind that night or when she cried and struggled in pain when she was recovering from her injuries.

Leah stuffed her cold hands in her jacket pocket and followed Nat’s footprints in the snow, never once looking up from the ground while Travis’ arm brushed against hers.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Tai calling out to Shauna that dinner was ready pulled Leah from her thoughts. She’d been staring out the foggy window thinking about the rest of the world, outside their purgatory. 

“Hey. The fuck are you doing?” Mari and a few others crowded around the fireplace where Misty knelt, stirring the dinner pot.

“Me?” Misty turned and asked looking up at Mari. Leah glanced away from the window and furrowed her brows at the scene in front of her.

“Get away from that. You know the rules.” Mari stated and Leah couldn’t help but agree, the last thing they needed was another shroom incident.

“It’s not like I'm going to poison anyone. Again” Misty scoffed but realized her mistake as she trailed off.

“You drew the four this morning, Misty. You have to get the water.” Akilah nodded over towards the front door. Leah was lucky enough she kept getting sevens, meaning she only had to help with laundry.

“But that’s not fair. I… I’ve been doing it every day, and it’s freezing out there. I…” Misty complained but saw the rest of the girls' careless looks and gave up. 

“Fine” She said aggressively and stomped over towards the bucket, picking it up and slamming the cabin door shut behind her.

Leah felt slightly bad and wondered if maybe she should offer to get the water for Misty next time, but as soon as she pursed her lips in thought Mari sat down next to her.

“Don’t even think about it” Mari muttered with her arms crossed looking at Leah.

Leah shrunk back slightly and shrugged in confusion. Mari rolled her eyes with a lack of anger behind them.

“You’re already doing double the work, going out with Travis and Natalie? As well as helping out with chores. Seriously, leave something for the rest of us” Mari’s tone was sincere but filled with light humor. Leah nodded and smiled sheepishly. 

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah could barely feel the heat from the fire from the other side of the room. She knew it was definitely warming up the small cabin but from where she laid in the corner, it didn’t really feel like it. She stared awake at the ceiling and heard the faint shuffling from the rest of the group. In the corner of her eyes she saw Nat and Travis’ outline sitting in front of the fire. She didn’t have to strain to hear them, the sleeping cabin was quiet enough to hear a pin drop let alone whispers.

“You can go to sleep if you want to” Travis whispered out after a particularly long silence. 

“I will in a minute. Really enjoying the stone age TV right now” Nat joked quietly. Leah shuffled around under her blankets, trying to get comfortable again, hoping to get a somewhat decent sleep before having to get up at a random time during the night.

“I know you think he’s dead” Travis whispered out and Leah frowned and gulped harshly.

“It’s been two months… i-in this cold.” Nat trailed off and Leah sat up quickly feeling eyes burning into her head.

She turned and looked over and saw Travis looking over his shoulder at her with tears and fear in his eyes. His stuttering breathing was made obvious by the quiet and Nat panicked next to him.

“Travis?” Nat questioned and Leah pushed the blankets off her, rushing over to him dodging the sleeping girls in her way.

She slid down next to him knocking her knee with his leg as she did so. His wide frantic eyes were glued to her calmer ones, like a sailor to a lifeboat. She grabbed his closest hand and placed it hard against her chest in the valley between her breasts, as they’d done many times before. She didn’t press down hard enough for him to feel her heartbeat but plenty enough for him to feel her deep and steady breathing. 

With one hand she held his hand against her. She raised her other hand in a practiced ease against his tear stained cheek. As much as she wanted to swipe the tears tracks away she held him there, grounding him as she stared with a calming facade. 

His shaky breathing began matching her own, and even though his lip still wobbled the tears had stopped falling down his face. They sat there staring at each other, breathing in sync. Understanding each other on an unspoken level. Finally Travis blinked harshly, letting his final tears fall and she knew he was all right now.

Leah smiled softly and empathetically at him and lowered her hand from his cheek but didn’t let go of his other hand, she let both their hands rest on her lap. She squeezed his hand reassuringly and he looked up at her with an adoring look she could only describe as looking like a shy puppy.

The floorboard creaked as Lottie inched forward, looking down from where she was standing near them. Leah’s head snapped over towards her, she’d forgotten about the rest of the cabin who was all now awake and looking at the commotion.

Leah darted her eyes quickly over to Natalie who’d shuffled back slightly and whose frown increased as her eyes flickered between both of them and Lottie. 

“Your brother’s alive. I know he is.” Lottie said and Travis stared up at her. “You should get some rest” She muttered and stood and walked away nervously.

A range of emotions flooded through Travis’ eyes, he darted them back over to meet Leah’s who only squeezed his hand comfortingly again.

Nat stood up and walked past Leah a bit too close, standing on her free hand placed on the floor. Leah held a poker face and made no noise but she knew Travis caught it. Nat rushed over to Lottie and pulled her aside to have a hushed talk between them.

Leah placed her sore hand over Travis’ soothingly rubbing the back of his hand, and she smiled to herself when he carefully soothed her aching hand with his.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰ 1996 ꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The earlier start to the hunt didn’t change their findings so far, but hopefully it meant they’d at least be able to get a bit further out than last time.

Nat had decided Leah was going off in her own direction today, it confused her on why Nat had specifically ordered it but she obeyed nonetheless. The three continued their searching in their respective directions but their efforts were in vain. Just another day of not finding food or Javi. Leah sighed and her breath fogged up in front of her. 

Once again Leah met up with them at the rendezvous point however this time both Nat and Travis stood talking to each other. As Leah shuffled closer towards the distant pair, it was clear they were disagreeing about something, whatever Travis mumbled to Nat she didn’t want to hear as she waved him off dismissively and started walking away.

Leah heard Travis sigh and she hesitantly approached him. He turned at the sound of the sow crunching beneath her shoes. He flicked her a tired look and she returned one back. She waited for him to start walking but he only leaned back against the nearest tree. 

“Can I ask you something?” He quietly asked and she nodded as she walked over to him. He gulped and looked at her hesitantly.

“Why did you say my name?” He whispered delicately and she held her breath at the question. They hadn’t talked about it. She’d been able to tell him about the wolves and her fall but they both never mentioned her broken silence.

She looked into his eyes and saw no judgment, not that she ever thought there would be. Leah reached for his hand and he watched her take his glove off, holding it with her other hand, and traced her coded words into the palm of his hand.

Sorry. I was scared

“No. No, don’t- don’t apologize. I’ve just never heard you speak before” He stuttered out sincerely. Leah shuffled her weight to her other leg nervously as she wrote her vague answer.

First time

His brow pinched together and he leaned closer “First, like ever?” His head shook as he spoke with surprise. Leah nodded. She felt her cheeks blush and was thankful for the cold wind she could blame it on.

“And it was my name huh?” He questioned and looked at her with a wide smirk, reminding her of a time before winter hit. “Well, now I feel special” He joked and she rolled her eyes with a smile.

Good

Leah wrote on his palm before whacking his hand away playfully and began walking away following the footsteps in the snow. Travis chuckled behind her, catching up to her and swiped his glove from her other hand. 

 

Chapter 15: Cannibals And More Cannibals

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“I’m pretty sure it’s done by now” Crystal muttered looking over at the hot pan over the fire.

“Yeah” Misty whispered next to her and Mari looked over her shoulder at the pair.

“Oh, great. There are two of you now?” Mari deadpanned and kept stirring food in the pan.

Leah sat next to the fireplace watching her stir, Mari side eyed Leah with a smirk sharing an eye roll with her at the two girls behind her.

“Is Shauna in the shed again?” Akilah asked

“It’s freezing outside” Nat pointed out and Leah silently nodded.

“Well, then maybe one of you should go out and get her” Coach Scott said, not looking up from his book. 

Tai groaned when nobody else moved and stood up from the table she and Nat were sitting at.

“Don’t. She’ll come when she’s ready” Lottie ordered and Tai turned to look at her.

“You make it sound like she’s doing her homework, Lot.” Tai sassed out and Leah fiddled with her ring nervously.

“She’s processing and she needs our support. I think it's healthy” Lottie explained monotonically.

“So healthy. Everyone who’s seven months pregnant should risk getting pneumonia by staying up half the night chatting with their dead best friend.” Nat mocks and Leah furrows her brows looking between Lottie, Nat and Tai anxiously.

“It’s not fair. We’re always waiting on her.” Misty groans and whines out.

“Well, maybe we should just eat hers tonight. That’ll get her to move her ass.” Mari says as she takes the pan off the fire.

“No one is eating Shauna’s food” Tai sternly ordered and half the group turned to look at Lottie.

Leah watched parts of the group wait for Lottie’s word. 

“No one is eating Shauna’s share.” Lottie reiterated and the group nodded.

‘When did Lottie become the chosen voice of reason?’

Leah silently sighed and wondered what had been happening inside the cabin while she wasn’t there.

“Okay, who reeks?” Tai groaned out and Van scoffed slightly “We all do”

“Yeah, but this is next-level” Tai answered, causing the rest of the group to secretly sniff themselves making sure it wasn’t them. Leah had been stuffing pine tree needles in her pockets when she’d leave the cabin, so all she smelt like was a pine tree.

Leah watched Tai turn around and walk into the pantry. 

“Are you fucking serious? Who took a shit in the pee bucket?” Tai stomped out with the bucked and lifted the lid for the smell to linger around the group. Leah grimaced and huddled away closer to the fire.

“Come on, guys, we made a rule. If it’s yellow, it can mellow. If it’s brown, then fucking do it outside. Just fess up. Who was it?” Natalie loudly complained 

“Does it look like a girl poo or, you know… a boy one?” Misty asked the group quietly

“What?” Coach asked 

“That is definitely not a thing” Travis said with a slight smirk and Leah tried not to smile.

“Seriously? You all need to grow up. Whoever did it, just admit it and then go throw it out.” Tai said looking around the room, when no one moved Tai threw her hands up. “Oh, for fuck’s sake. I’ll do it.” 

Tai walked to the door with the bucket and turned back around “Where’s the other lantern?” She asked defeatedly.

“Akilah had it yesterday” Misty outed and Akilah’s eyes went wide “I put it back, Misty” Akilah said sternly.

“Oh my god. You’re all a literal shit show” Tai said pulling up her scarf over her lower face, she turned back towards the group “Don’t let anyone eat mine” She muttered and slammed the door shut quickly but the winter air clogged up the room.

Leah watched as the rest of the girls quickly dove towards the food, Leah shuffled her way in and made sure to have enough to give some to Tai, Van looked over at Leah and nodded gratefully at her.

 ─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah waited for Travis to finish up the circle with Lottie and a few others. She thought the whole ‘wilderness god’ was just Lottie having a good number of coincidences. She allowed herself to question Lottie and her decisions but never once did she judge Travis for engaging in them too. She understood he’d find whatever hope he needed to to find his brother. To be honest with herself she was half a hair away from joining him.

“You waited?” He questioned as he stood next to her. Leah nodded with a slight shrug as if to say ‘of course’. He nodded silently and she knew he understood.

Travis silently took off his glove and outstretched his hand for her to take, which she did with a curious look.

“How-How are you?” He hesitantly asked and she raised a brow at him before he lazily pointed between her arm and leg.

Better. Thanks for the prayer

She wrote with an honest smile and his eyes widened. “How did you-” She cut him off with a silent laugh. 

Read lips

He smirked slightly at her, as if he wanted to make a joke but didn't. Instead he just smiled at her leaving a tender mood lingering over the pair. Leah smiled back at him, she briefly looked behind him and saw Nat inside the cabin, moving away from the window.

‘Guess it’s time to get moving then’

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The three of them trudged through the cold snow. The sunlight beamed down on them making the snow glisten in front of them.

“You missed the blessing” Travis said to Nat who walked beside him.

“I figured you had it covered” She responded without looking at him. Leah stood to Nat’s other side looking at the surrounding area.

“Would’ve been better if you could’ve been there. The tea, it’s just a symbol.” Travis looked over at Nat while he talked.

“Of what, exactly?” Nat asked full of scrutiny. Leah stopped by a small pine tree sticking out of the group and filled her jacket pocket with pine needles before running and catching up to the pair.

“Of not being so closed off. Thinking you know everything” Travis answers and Nat scoffs, making Leah look at her with furrowed eyebrows.

“I’m sorry. She-she goes all witch doctor messiah, and I’m the one that’s not being humble?” Nat rants looking over at Travis

“I was talking about myself” Travis interjects but she ignores him and continues.

“Okay. It doesn’t bother you that we’re freezing our asses off, trying to feed everyone, while she’s off holding hands and mumbling, and making friends with the spirits of each and every fucking pine needle?” Nat waves her hand in frustration as she rambles.

“Everyone has their role. Okay? We’re gonna need more than just food if we’re gonna make it through this winter.” Travis explains and Leah nodded mutely.

‘Yeah, morale and all that’

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, did she put that in your head?” Nat stops walking as she speaks but Travis sighs and keeps walking. Leah follows him.

“Hey, come on. No, we’re going this way. The wind is blowing that way. The brush, it’ll be covered in snow. Less vegetation, less game.” She explains and Travis stops to look at her. Leah shuffles to look between them.

“No, we’ve been that way before.” He turns to leave and Nat sighed before she speaks.

“You won’t have the gun. If you find anything, how are you gonna kill it?” She asked and Leah couldn’t help but feel slightly annoyed, how many times had Leah gone off on her own? Too many to count. 

“We’ll figure something out” Travis said, glancing over at Leah who nodded and secretly smiled at her inclusion. 

“Fine. If you want to go that way, then go that way but make sure you get to the rendezvous point on time. Okay?” Nat declared and Leah nodded at her words.

“See you later. Goodluck” He pulled his face covering back up and walked away, Leah followed after him and silently did the same. As the pair walked away they didn’t see the glare Nat directed at Leah’s direction.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah and Travis made their way back to the rendezvous point. Travis took off his gloves as he got closer, stretching his hands in the cold. Nat turned around to face them and pulled something out of her backpack. She held up a pair of brown bloody pants. Leah’s eyes went wide and Travis froze as Nat walked closer.

“Where, um” He trailed off, voice full of shock.

“Hanging on a branch. A couple miles back.” Leah silently gasped and Travis walked past Nat with furrowed eyebrows.

“Did you- did you look for him?” He stuttered out and Leah took the bloody pants from Nat as she rushed after Travis.

“Everywhere, everywhere!” She loudly answered and he pushed her back away from him.

Leah felt the pockets of the pants and knew they were Javi’s but she kept checking every pocket. When she was sure every pocket was checked and was empty. Leah felt the cold blood from the pants and looked up at Natalie with a wicked glare. Javi wouldn’t leave without his knife. A knife she told no one about. A knife that would keep him alive. This was a ruse and Leah felt sick to her stomach. That Natalie would lie to her, to Travis, about this? About Javi? Leah shook her head silently.

“Huh, Did you dig? Did you dig!?” He yelled out with tears in his eyes.

“I screamed, but nothing.” Natalie yelled back to him in dismay.

“No, no” Travis mumbled and Natalie launched over to him. “Hey, come back. I swear. Hey” She promised him and he pushed her off him. Leah scoffed silently.

‘You swear? You swear! Seriously’

“We have to go get him” He pleaded. 

“Come on, come on” She muttered as she pulled him back and he knelt to the ground crying openly for anyone to see.

Leah crawled over to him in the snow. She grabbed his hand, forgetting about the bloody pants in her other hand. 

Lying! She’s lying! Lying!

She wrote in their shared code repeatedly until he looked at her in confusion with tears rolling down his cheeks.

He's not dead!

She wrote a final time and he looked between Leah and the blood stained pants.

He can't, please

He looked in her eyes and nodded, Natalie still muttered useless soothing words to him, unaware of their silent conversation. Leah’s eyes flickered to the top of Natalie’s head and she glared coldly at her but Travis’ secret code stopped her.

Pretend

Leah frowned but agreed and leaned into him, hugging him, giving him comfort for an entirely different reason than Natalie thought.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

The three silently walked back to the cabin, when they arrived everyone was gathered outside with Jackie’s dead body lying on a pile of wood and sticks.

“What the fuck is going on? What did you do to her face?” Natalie asked and Tai walked over to her.

“We decided it was time to move on.” Tai answered and Lottie watched from afar. 

“This has been a fucking day” Natalie scoffs looking over at Travis. Leah’s eye twitched but she’d promised Travis not to do anything. She sighed and bumped her arm lightly with his.

“Wait, are those Javi’s?” Akilah questioned with a sad waver in her voice and Travis held them up slightly.

“No. Can’t be.” Lottie muttered out and Natalie turned to face her.

“Not another word.” Natalie warned her but Lottie cut her off “No, Javi’s alive. I can feel it.” Lottie shook her head with certainty.

“For fuck’s sake, shut up! Don’t you see how much damage you are doing? Why? Lottie, why? What is making you fucking do this? You can’t just keep making him-” Natalie’s rant was cut off by the rest of the girls shushing her when they saw Shauna light up a torch and slowly walk towards Jackie.

“Jackie. I’ll never have another friend like you. I don’t even know where you end and I begin. I’m sorry. And I love you.” Shauna cried out and sniffled as she lit the makeshift pyre.

Leah glanced over at Travis who was watching Shauna. He folded the bloody pants and walked over to the edge of the pyre. As he placed the fabric on the burning sticks he mouthed words he wanted only Leah to know.

"We'll find him. Together.’

Travis watched the fabric burn for a second before turning back around towards the cabin, he caught her eye and she showed she understood with a slight nod. Leah watched Natalie walk into the cabin after him and Leah turned her gaze to meet Lottie’s. 

“I can feel it. Javi’s alive” Lottie whispered once everyone else had trickled back into the cabin. Leah looked over at her with such seriousness Lottie stood up straighter to meet her eyes. All Leah did was nod slowly and walk into the cabin.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Travis knelt inside the shed lighting candles and fixing his blanket. He turned and stood at the sound of footsteps and both Leah and Natalie stood in the small doorway.

“I thought you might want some company?” Natalie whispered and moved in front of Leah slightly. All Leah did was raise her hand awkwardly which held an extra blanket she’d taken for Travis to have.

Travis looked to the ground between them “I- uh don’t really want company right now.” He muttered out and Natalie nodded and stood back from the door a bit.

“Y-yeah ‘course” She added sympathetically.

‘As if she had anything to feel bad about.’

Leah shuffled, glancing behind her before handing Travis the blanket and turning around. Travis gently grabbed her arm rather than the blanket she held and she looked back at him questioningly.

He pulled her further into the shed as she let him guide her into the small room. Natalie scoffed looking between both of them before storming off slamming the door shut.

The candles flickered from the sudden movement but stayed alight. Leah watched as he shuffled to sit onto his makeshift bed, she sat next to him and he laid the blanket she’d given him over their legs. Without hesitation he held her hand, warming it with his own.

Leah rested her head on Travis’ shoulder and began tracing another coded story on his palm. Travis closed his eyes and relaxed against the shed wall, letting himself focus on Leah’s silent words.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Travis lightly shook Leah awake. She silently groaned as she moved her head away from his shoulder and quickly wiped the corner of her mouth where she’d been drooling on him in her sleep.

She looked at him, staring in confusion at the shed door. She felt a rush when she smelt something from outside. They shared a glance before exiting the shed. 

The rest of the group had begun walking out of the cabin, towards where the pyre had been. In its place was what was left of Jackie’s body and the charcoal from the half burnt wood beneath her. Whatever sleep had been hanging onto Leah’s mind shattered at the realization that the smell lingering in the air was human flesh.

Leah watched as one by one the group knelt around the failed pyre. She hadn’t realized she’d been following them until her knees met the cold snow, jolting her back to reality. She looked over Jackie’s cooked body and saw Travis knelt between the girls across from her. His eyes were full of dread but they were fully locked on Leah, waiting to see what she does.

The cold air stung her wide eyes as she watched unblinking as Shauna took her hunting knife and cut a piece of her best friend's meat and began to eat. It was sickening. It was wrong. The rest of the group quickly followed suit after Shauna started. Elbows on either side of Leah bumped her as they pulled and bit chunks of flesh off of their captain.

Leah’s lips trembled and her stomach roared with hunger making her internally wince. She slowly picked up a loose piece of meat from the pyre. The flesh was still warm from the fire. Her hands felt like ice in comparison and they shook like a leaf in the wind.

She looked at the flesh in her hands, she tried to push the thoughts of Jackie’s face, of Jackie’s voice, of Jackie away. 

“Forgive me. Please, God. Forgive me for this” Leah whispered out, but it was lost in the wind by the noises of the girls around her.

Leah met Travis’ eyes like a lifeline, if either of them looked away they’d see the animalistic girl’s around them. Their eyes held a devastating understanding, an awareness of their actions, of their decision.

Leah took a bite of her former teammate with tears streaming down her face. Travis silently repeated her pleading prayer and copied her taking a bite of the girl he once vaguely knew. Never once did their eyes waver from each other.

Leah stayed knelt there long after the rest of the girls had returned to the cabin. Travis shakily stood and walked over to her, gripping her arm and helping her up from the cold ground.

The walk back to the shed was slow and sluggish. Leah’s shoulders sagged and Travis led the way for her. They returned to their previous place under the blankets inside the shed except this time Leah buried her head in between his shoulder and neck, trying to hide her uncontrollable sobs. Travis held her tightly, in hopes she wouldn’t disappear before his eyes.

With her exhaustion from her sobs and her belly unfortunately warm and full, she fell asleep against Travis with drying tears down her face. Travis pulled the blanket over her, making sure she was warm and covered before he let his own silent tears roll down his cheeks.

Chapter 16: A Mourning Morning

 

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah felt warm despite the bite of the winter air. She laid against Travis who slept peacefully for once. She snuggled under the shared blanket and relaxed against Travis’ chest where her head was placed. The old socks they wore stuck out from the bottom of the blanket making her slightly smile.

She subconsciously thought back to the prior night and their vile actions. She felt a pang of guilt and shame in her heart. Her brows furrowed and she frowned.

‘It was only going to get worse. Jackie was only the beginning…’

She felt a rush of anxiety and her throat closed in fear. Her breathing increased unsteadily but she closed her eyes and listened to the beat of Travis’ sleeping heart. She copied his deep breathing. Leah’s brain drifted to how Travis had held her that night. How it made her feel the slightest bit better. Her heart beat faster for an entirely different reason.

Travis turned his head to the side as he woke up, groaning slightly at the light peeking into the shed. He glanced down at her and briefly smiled at her before yawning and rubbing his eyes, trying to wake up.

“Hey” He mumbled with a groggy and deep morning voice. Leah didn’t dare move away from him, tracing on his hand of the arm wrapped lazily around her.

Hi

The corners of his lips quirked to a soft smirk. He tapped his foot with hers and she smiled at him before frowning, hearing the hysterical yelling from Tai outside the cabin. 

‘She clearly found what was left of Jackie.’

Leah looked up at Travis with a serious look before tracing her next determined words on his hand.

We are going to survive this. 

He nodded at her with such affirmation it secretly surprised him. He couldn’t name another person he trusted as much as he did Leah.

We are going to find Javi and the three of us will survive.

Travis shifted his hand and delicately traced his own coded words into her palm.

I trust you

She smiled and nodded with a relieved sigh. She placed her head back down on his chest and relaxed against him. He gently pulled the blanket over her shoulders ignoring the cold over his own.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

With Natalie determined to return Jackie’s bones to the plane crash alone. Leah and Travis went off to search for Javi. Leah didn’t want to admit it but she was glad Natalie was busy, now they didn’t have to think of a reason to keep looking for the boy Natalie claimed to be dead. 

The pair walked through the pale snow in silence. Every now and then their arms would purposely bump into each other, wordlessly reminding the other of their presence. Leah’s breath heaved out in front of her mouth as they looked out from the mountain they stood on. Travis sighed at the sight or rather lack thereof. Another day without any sign of Javi. 

“Leah?” Travis said, looking over at the midday sun. She tilted her head to show she was listening. “Maybe we should go back early” He looked over his shoulder at her and she reached out for his hand.

We can look again tomorrow

Travis nodded with tired eyes and Leah gave him a reassuring smile. They turned back and made their way down. With only a small amount down to go Leah’s bad leg wobbled underneath her and she tripped into the wet snow.

“Leah!” Travis yelled and turned rushing over to her but stopped when she pushed herself up looking over at him with a pouting frown and snow stuck to the top of her hair. 

He couldn’t stop himself from bursting out laughing, she resembled a wet grumpy cat. She rolled her eyes with a large smile at his loud chuckles. Travis caught his breath before sitting down in the snow next to her and wiped the snow off of her hair.

She took his hand and traced her words carefully.

I hate snow.

He laughed at her pout and gently flicked her jutted bottom lip making her smile again.

“Do you trust me?” He said, voice filled with mischief. She narrowed her eyes at him but nodded nonetheless. 

He reached out to her and held her as if he was going to hug her. Until he let himself fall to his side and they both went rolling down the short amount of hill they had left to walk down, like children down a grassy hill. They reached the bottom in a pile of snow like a ball pit and both of their giggles rang out through the forest. Travis tried to cement the sound of her laughter in his mind forever.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

They took their time returning to the cabin. Sunlight still shone brightly over the tall forest when they entered the clearing around the cabin. Akilah stood on the porch holding something in her hands. She looked up at the pair and half smiled at them.

“Hey. We’re making things for a baby shower for Shauna, if you guys are interested?” Akilah looked up from where she finished tying a knot on the clump in her hands. 

Leah shuffled nervously. She knew she should be a good friend and join them, for Shauna’s sake but Leah couldn’t get the sight of Shauna and her hunting knife against Jackie’s skin. Thankfully Travis was aware of her internal debate and spoke up on her behalf.

“We’re, uh, pretty tired from searching for Javi.” He paused awkwardly and Akilah’s eyes widened at the mention of Javi.

“That’s fine. I’ll give her this from all of us” She nodded sympathetically and lifted her present, which Leah still didn’t know what it was supposed to be but she smiled gratefully at her before heading back into the shed with Travis thanking Akilah behind her.

Leah shrugged off her jacket, placing it down in a folded pile next to her and Travis’ extra clothes in the corner. She sat down on top of the blankets as Travis entered the shed and closed the door behind him, following her steps of getting cozy before sitting next to her. He silently handed over his arm letting her write what she needed to.

Am I a bad friend? Because I don’t want to go to the baby shower?

Travis’ brows furrowed and he shook his head, making his hair fall dangerously close to his eyes. Leah sniffled, looking into his brown eyes with uncertainty. He squeezed her hand and wrote in code.

I promise Leah

She wholeheartedly believed him and nodded at his silent words. Once again they shuffled closer to each other and sat in silence as they traced secret stories to one another.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah was surprised by the craftsmanship of the laurel Akilah made Shauna, with the addition of their names on the gift. Shauna had put it on straight away with a smile. 

Van handed over her gift to Shauna.

“What is it?” Shauna asked, looking it over in her hand.

“It’s a changing teepee. To catch the pee. If it's a boy. I saw one at a party emporium once.” Van explained, embarrassed.

“I don’t get it” Mari blurted out and Van looked like she wanted to die.

“Uh, no, yeah, it’s good thinking. Thanks Van” Shauna appreciated it with a small smile.

“Yeah” Van nodded before swiftly returning to her seat. 

Leah smiled at her and waited for the next person to present their gift. Lottie was about to get up when Misty interrupted.

“For my gift, I would like to perform a monologue from Steel Magnolias.” Misty explained and Crystal clapped from her seat on the ground next to Misty’s feet.

Everyone shuffled around hesitantly looking around at each other with silent caution. Crystal held up her hands like a makeshift stage set. The longer Misty’s monologue went on the more Leah was confused. 

“Did she really choose a scene about a dead daughter?” Tai quietly questioned and Van nodded in surprise. Leah’s eyes widened as she looked behind her listening in to their hushed conversation. 

“Are you surprised?” Natalie said, looking over at Tai. Leah shuffled to move away from the small group and caught Travis’ eye as Misty began crying out in character.

They both shuffled to the back of the cabin and opened the bedroom door where Coach Scott laid in bed.

“This has got to be the weirdest baby shower ever.” Travis muttered and Leah nodded behind him still looking back at the rest of the group. “You okay, man? You seem… weird” Travis trailed off and Leah looked over his shoulder and shrugged at the odd state of their Coach.

Thankfully they returned when the rest of Misty’s act was finished. The cabin clapped for her and she smiled widely.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

After many more gifts Lottie finally stood from her seat.

“So he doesn’t get cold” Lottie said, handing the baby blanket over to her. 

“Thank you, Lottie. I love it.” Shauna smiled up at her from her seat. Leah saw the symbol drawn on the corner of the blanket but brushed it off, as long as Shauna was fine with it.

“Is this supposed to be funny or something? I-I mean…” Natalie shook her head in dismay.

“What? No” Lottie offendedly answered.

“Then why would you put that creepy symbol on a baby blanket? Or don’t you remember how we found it all around a dead guy’s fucking corpse?” Natalie stood as she ridiculed Lottie.

“Yeah, I remember, but… I think he was using it as protection.” Lottie timidly explained.

“He died, Lottie” Natalie overexaggerated her words.

“Just because you don’t understand something doesn’t mean it’s evil.” Lottie barked out and Natalie ignored her. Leah’s eyes bounced from person to person anxiously. 

“Give that to me” Natalie said as she reached to grab the blanket out of Shauna’s hands.

“Shauna, don’t! It was a gift” Mari yanked it from Nat and gave it back to Shauna. Misty stood up.

“We still don’t know exactly what it is.” Misty pointed out and crossed her arms, Crystal put her hand on Misty's shoulder comfortingly.

“And doesn’t her baby deserve protection?” Akilah chimed in, now everyone was standing except Leah, who was staring at the wooden floor hoping for the argument to be over.

“Well, I trust Lottie” Mari said, standing between Natalie and Lottie protectively.

“Oh, yeah, news flash!” Natalie yelled out as she walked away from the group ganging up on her.

“So do I” Misty argued. 

“Me, too. She knows things. We’ve all seen it.” Akilah added.

Leah felt Travis gently bump into her, checking in on her but she didn’t have it in her to look up from the floor just yet.

“She’s not God, you guys” Tai interjected but Van cut her off with her hand on her temples. “No one is saying she is”

“Oh, my god, Shauna” Misty muttered out and rushed over to her. Leah looked up from the floor and saw Shauna’s nose bleeding down her chin.

“Does somebody have a…” Misty trailed off and Tai knelt down next to her holding up a small folded rag for her to use.

Shauna’s blood dripped onto the symbol on the baby blanket and small thuds broke out from outside. Leah’s anxiety didn’t lessen from the strange noises.

“What the fuck is that?” Van questioned.

The thuds stopped and they exited the cabin. Across the white snow was bits of black scattered around the area.

‘Birds. Dead birds.’

“Did these guys just suicide on our roof?” Mari questioned as she hugged herself from the outside cold.

“Don’t touch them. They might be diseased” Natalie advised.

“We know that there’s a lot of iron in the ground, so maybe it messed with the birds’ navigation.” Misty pondered out loud but no one looked convinced.

“We should gather its blessings” Lottie said and Van obeyed.

Travis looked over at Leah who stood frozen and wide eyed at the dead birds scattered around them. He nudged her hand and she grasped his, holding it tight yet she didn’t move. He knew her better than she thought; Travis knew something was wrong.

He ignored the look Lottie and Natalie gave him as he guided Leah away from the dead birds and back into their shared space in the shed.

As soon as the door shut behind them, Leah let go of his hand and paced the small area frantically. She wrung her hands together nervously and tears sprang from her eyes.

“Leah?” Travis tried to cut off her pacing by standing in front of her but Leah just looked up at him terrified.

He cupped her wet cheeks with his cold hands. She looked into his eyes and shakily breathed out.

“We’re okay? Yeah?” He whispered in the gentlest voice he could muster.

Leah’s shoulder relaxed and slotted against him, letting him wrap his arms around her as she steadied her breathing.

“We’re okay” He muttered as he leaned his chin on the top of her head, he calmed slightly as he felt her nod against him.

“We’re okay” Leah croakily repeated but Travis heard it. The sound of her voice alone made him feel better than anything else.

 

Chapter 17: Dreaming On Such A Winter's Day

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Despite the loud and horrendous singing from Misty and Crystal, Leah slouched in her seat next to the fire. The warmth of the soup she’d finished and from the fire beside her, she was finding it harder to stay awake.

The early morning chore handouts and dinner time was the only time Leah and Travis were inside the noisy cabin. Travis was already missing the quiet of the shed.

The cabin door swung open and Shauna rushed inside holding the meat rations on a wooden board. The cold wind from outside woke Leah up and she glanced over at Travis briefly.

“Thank God, because I am tired of starling soup.” Akilah muttered out with a sigh.

Shauna placed the board down aggressively and stood looking around at the group. 

“So who’s the thief? Someone stole some beaver meat from the snow baskets.” The rest of the group stayed silent. “I guess they think they deserve more than the rest of us, which… at this point, is pretty fucked. If anybody, I’m the one who should be taking some more, except i’m not because i’m not the fucking worst. So which one of you is?” Shauna glared around the room.

A few girls shuffled anxiously, but no one spoke up. “Okay. Right. Whatever.” Shauna mumbled and turned to get dinner ready.

Akilah wandered over to sit next to Mari while Misty and Crystal whispered to each other quietly. Leah glanced at Travis who was already looking at her. Coach Scott made his way over to his seat in the corner of the room.

“It was probably him. He thinks he’s so much better than us.” Mari leaned over to Akilah and not-so discreetly whispered.

Coach Scott paused in his tracks. “I didn’t take the fucking meat. Okay? In case you forgot, not exactly nimble in the snow.” He lifted his makeshift crutch in the air and kept walking until he turned around to face the group.

“But you know what? If it had been me, what exactly would you do about it? Would you eat me?” He questioned heatedly and Leah looked up at him. 

‘Why is he playing with fucking fire right now? None of this is helpful’

Mari stood up with a determined tint in her eyes and walked towards him. Natalie stood from her seat by the window and stopped Mari.

“Let’s all chill, you guys. There’s just no way that Coach would ever…” Mari cut Natalie off.

“This is all because of you, you know.” Mari accused Natalie, who scrunched up her face. “Excuse me?”

“Why we don’t have any meat. Lottie tries to bless you for the hunt, but half the time you’re MIA. Or when you do show up, it’s like you’re practically holding your nose.” Mari fumed.

“Are you joking? You actually think that’s why we can’t find any game? Because of me? I’m the only one that’s even trying. Me and Travis. While the rest of you guys are just fucking sitting on your asses” Natalie scoffs and defends herself.

“If there isn’t any game, then how did Leah get the beavers? Huh, or how did Lottie get the birds?” Mari argues. Leah and Lottie look up at her in surprise.

“Um, Lottie didn’t get the birds. They flew into the cabin.” Tai stated. “Because she told them to” Mari answered.

“It did happen when the blood dripped on the symbol that she made.” Akilah added and Travis shuffled closer to Leah.

“We’re still not really sure that’s why” Shauna said and shook her head slightly. 

“Yeah, you see, that’s what we call a coincidence. Okay? Those birds were just… like, confused, or… they had a disease or something.” Coach Scott tried to explain but Misty shook her head, making her curls bounce. 

“No, if they were diseased, then we would’ve gotten sick from eating them.” Misty informs.

“What about the bear? I don’t think anyone who saw that could call it a coincidence.” Van dead-toned explained.

“Leah, did also catch the beavers without a gun” Akilah muttered and Mari nodded her head.

“Exactly. It all goes to show: the only food we’ve had in months is thanks to Leah and Lottie” Mari stated. Leah’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and she held her hands up in a mock surrender.

“Then we should have a contest. Yeah? On our own. Us three go out, and then at the end of the day, we see who makes it back here with more food.” Natalie explains with a slight smirk.

“Come on, Nat, that’s not fair. They’re not hunters” Travis spoke up glancing between Natalie and Leah.

“Apparently Leah is. And according to them, Lottie’s better than a hunter.” Natalie scoffed out, turning to look at Lottie. 

Leah shook her head and turned to look at Travis, who looked unsure of the whole situation.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah leaned against the wall as Misty dramatically cleared her throat, gaining the group’s attention.

“Okay, so, no assistance of any kind. If you get a kill, just leave it where it is and we will come and help you bring it back. You, yourself, have to be back by sundown, or you’re automatically disqualified. If you’re not back by then, we’ll come out and we’ll find you.” Misty explained and smiled uncannily. 

“Oh, and for weapons… we only have… one gun, so, um, maybe you can draw cards…” Misty leaned and picked up the gun. 

“Lottie doesn’t need a gun” Mari quickly interrupted. The rest of the girls looked over at Natalie.

“Okay” Misty handed the gun to Natalie.

The group slowly exited the cabin. Leah and Travis stood on the porch watching the rest of the group help the two girls get ready. 

Natalie turned, getting ready for the hunt towards the right, Lottie did the same towards the left. Tai handed Natalie her headband, Mari helped Lottie put her head cap on. Travis placed his hand in Leah’s.

“I’m glad you’re not going out there” He leaned down to whisper to her. She smiled softly at him and once again thanked the cold for hiding her blush.

Leah pointed to the collar of his jacket and Travis looked down. She quickly dragged her finger up, flicking his nose. She let out a silent laugh. He smiled at her before following her back into the cabin.

Lottie and Natalie looked over at each other before walking off into the snowy forest.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sprawled out on the wooden floor like a starfish. Travis laughed at her and she lifted her head to look over at him. 

“Having fun?” He teased. She nodded as she stretched and rolled over again. 

The attic was so much bigger than the small shed and with everyone downstairs, they had the whole attic to themselves.

She laid on her stomach, leaning on her arm and kicking her feet behind her. Travis shuffled to sit next to her. She leaned over and grabbed his arm, tracing on his hand.

What do you wanna talk about?

He shrugged easily. “If-” He paused and looked at her intently before continuing “-when we get out of here. What do you, think you’d do?”

Studying, I think

Leah thought about Tessa, she didn’t know when she’d stopped thinking about her but the reminder of her friend made her heart ache. 

‘It seems so weird, I think I've changed so much since I last talked to her…’

“What about after that?” He asked and she looked up at him. She shrugged and he squeezed her hand, urging her to answer. She sat for a moment to think.

I think I want a farm.

He smiled and she blushed, hiding her head in the crook of her arm. 

“A farm? Yeah, okay. What animals?” Travis nudged her and she peered up at him, tracing her answer on his hand.

I don’t know

“You don’t know?” He laughed and she hit his shoulder lightly as she sat up, crossing her legs in front of him.

Maybe goats

He nodded with a smile and brushed her hair out of her face. She thought about her ideal farm and her smile lessened. Leah looked at Travis with complete vulnerability. 

I want a farmhouse. With a porch that has windchimes and a swing chair. And has those ugly plaid curtains. A non-spooky attic. And a big tree out the front.

“Full southern huh?” He teased and she nodded enthusiastically with a smile.

I don’t want to stay in New Jersey forever.

He looked at her questioningly “Where do you wanna go?”

Anywhere new... Somewhere with you.

“Yeah? Then, we’ve got to get horses too” He lightly joked to hide his fast beating heart. Leah nodded and laughed silently.

Travis smiled as Leah kept explaining the details of her farm house.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah leaned on Travis’ outstretched legs, basking in the quiet of the attic. Travis leaned back looking out the window, watching the snowfall on the outside trees.

The trap door opened and Mari’s head popped up. Travis looked back at her and Leah sat up to smile at her.

“Since when did you two-” Mari began to ask with a slight smirk but Travis cut her off with a harsh tone.

“What did you want?” Leah glanced over at him, wondering why his mood shifted so quickly.

“Right, uh, did you hear dripping up here?” She asked, glancing around the room desperately. 

“No” Travis immediately answered, scrunching his face up at the odd question. Mari looked over at Leah who furrowed her brows and focused on the noises around her. She shook her head at Mari when she didn’t hear any dripping. 

Mari sighed and nodded, shutting the trap door behind her.

That was weird right?

Leah traced the coded words and Travis turned back to look at her, he nodded. Leah sighed and knelt, about to stand up.

I’m going to help her look

Travis tilted his head as if he couldn’t believe what she’d said. “Seriously?” He questioned and Leah shrugged, putting her hands up in surrender. She stood up and reached out for his hand. 

I feel bad for her

He shook his head and followed her down out of the attic. Travis sat next to the warm fire as Leah caught up to Mari silently letting her know she’d help her look for the strange dripping noise.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Natalie burst through the front door. Everyone turned to stare at her and she heaved from her sprint back to the cabin.

“Guys, I found a fucking moose.” She said.

“Wait…found but didn’t kill?” Travis said as he stood up.

“No, it’s dead, it’s frozen in the surface of the lake. I’m gonna need a lot of help to get it out of there” Natalie looked around the group as she spoke. 

Leah stood watching everyone flutter quickly around the cabin gathering what they could.

“Here. Take this” Coach Scott handed her the small axe he was holding. “And everyone dress as warmly as you can” He called to the rest of the group.

“Hey, I thought the rule was no assistance.” Mari started but Coach Scott groaned and cut her off.

“Oh, my God, Mari, this is food.” He said as turned to look at her. 

“If we can get this out, this moose will probably feed us till spring” Natalie puffed out and Misty walked past her with the large axe over her shoulder.

“Misty. You literally set the fucking rules. I’ll tell Lottie” Mari insisted.

“Go for it. Tell her I didn’t want us to fucking starve.” Misty snarled out and turned walking out the door. Mari shook her head in frustration.

Most of the group left the cabin and Travis turned before shutting the door, looking at Leah. She nodded and smiled slightly, letting him know it was okay. Travis curtly nodded and shut the cabin door behind him.

“I hope Lottie’s okay” Akilah muttered and stood over by the window. Mari followed and stood next to her. “Of course she is” Mari answered. 

Leah briefly looked over at them before sitting next to Shauna at the table.

“Hi” Shauna mumbled as she looked up. Leah gave her a tired smile and leaned over to grab the deck of cards that sat on the edge of the table.

She shuffled the cards and silently offered to play. Shauna nodded with a small smile and they played the best they could with the missing cards.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat rubbing the back of Travis’ cold hands in front of the fire. Natalie and Lottie had come back to the main room after hashing out their problems in the makeshift bathroom. Mari and Akilah sat next to Lottie. Natalie sat in the old chair staring at the fire’s flames.

Van and Tai burst through the cabin door, in between them wrapped in a blanket was Javi.

“No, that’s impossible” Shauna gasped and stood from her seat. Travis and Leah stood up immediately.  

The girl gathered around him. Travis pushed lightly past them and Leah followed behind him.

“You’re- You’re okay” Travis muttered and pulled Javi into a hug. “You’re safe now” He whispered as he pulled away. 

Travis looked behind Javi and saw Natalie looking at him guilty. Travis ignored her.

Leah moved to stand beside Travis and Javi turned wide-eyed at her. The younger boy silently launched forward towards her and she wrapped her arms around him. 

“This means Lottie was right. She’s the one who said Javi was alive” Mari spoke up from behind her but Leah paid her no attention.

Leah ushered Javi towards the warm fire and gently brushed the snowflakes from his hair. Travis passed her another blanket and she wrapped it around Javi. 

Travis and Leah sat on either side of Javi. Javi held Leah’s hand tight but she didn’t mind. All that mattered was he was safe.

Leah glanced away from the younger boy to Travis, who understood her silent words. Natalie stood in the corner watching the whole scene unfolding. Leah sighed and ignored the holes burning into the back of her head.

Chapter 18: The Snow Can Fuck Right Off

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

‘If I have to stay in this cabin with Misty snoring in my ear, for one more night. I’ll losing it’

Leah sighed and rubbed her temples, trying not to squint at the early sunlight bleeding into the cabin. She rolled up her bedroll and placed it with the others in the corner of the room. 

“Good morning” Tai smiled as she exited the attic, looking over at Shauna. 

“Is it?” Shauna scoffed as she fixed her blanket.

Leah zoned them out and looked out the window. Travis stood on the porch leaning against the old railing. She zipped up her jackets as she exited the cabin. He turned and stood up when he saw her. 

“Morning” He muttered and Leah nodded at him, standing next to him. He silently offered his hand to her and she traced her coded words.

Where’s Javi?

He flicked his other hand towards the forest. “Went on another walk” Leah pursed her lips but nodded.

Are you going to Lottie’s prayer thing?

He shook his head “Nah, was thinking of staying here” Travis mumbled and rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand. She smiled and looked out at the snowy trees.

I miss the shed

Travis laughed and she narrowed her eyes over at him. 

What?

“I know you do. You’re cranky from the noise” He chuckled and Leah rolled her eyes. 

I am not

He looked over at her with a smile and she paused to think about it. Leah pouted slightly and conceded.

Okay, maybe a little.

He shook his head and laughed, his breath fogged out in front of him. She gently nudged him with her arm in revenge for his light insult without any real anger behind it while waiting for Javi to come back.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah sat next to Javi in front of the fireplace in the cabin. She was glaring as angrily as she could at Van who only ignored her.

“Hey Javi, just nod if you found shelter” Van asked gently and Leah was about to slap her stupid face away. 

“Seriously, you owe us after stealing our beaver meat.” Mari insisted and Leah had enough. She stood up and pushed Mari's shoulder, making her stumble back with a shocked face.

“Hey, Trav?” Van yelled out and Travis turned from his seat at the table. “Yeah, maybe you could help here.”

“He’ll talk when he’s ready” He told her and swiveled back around. Leah nodded and glared at the girls around her.

“Yeah, well, maybe tell your crazy girlfriend to back down a little” Mari scoffed, looking Leah up and down. 

Natalie paused as she walked into the room. Travis stood up from the table and walked over to the girls around the fireplace. Leah locked eyes with him. 

“Javi.” Travis sternly said and Javi looked up at him. “Go with Leah, yeah?” Javi silently got up from his chair, taking his tea with him as Leah nodded and walked with him towards the shed. 

As she left she looked through the window and saw Travis arguing with Van and Mari. Leah sighed and shut the shed door behind her.

Javi silently sat himself down on the blankets in the corner. Leah smiled softly and sat next to him, placing the majority of the blankets over him. She let her arm rest against his, letting him know she was there for him. 

The quietness of the shed eased her. Travis was right, the cabin was far too noisy for her.

After a while the shed door opened and Travis entered holding an extra blanket. He laid it out over Leah and Javi, and sat down after brushing the snow from his shoes.

He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. Leah placed her other hand in his. 

He’ll be okay

Travis nodded and looked over at Javi with concern but calmed down a bit after seeing how Javi had relaxed since leaving the cabin. He squeezed her hand gently and she understood his worry.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah didn’t want to return to the cabin so quickly but she didn’t want Javi missing out on lunch. Mari poured the soup into the bowl and cup for her. As Leah walked back towards Javi, who sat waiting by the window for her, she discreetly poured more of the soup into the bowl. 

Javi turned to face her and she handed him the warm and full bowl. She sipped the small amount left in her cup as she sat next to the younger boy. Leah was too focused on Javi and making sure he was alright being back in the loud cabin to notice the emotional look in Travis’ eyes as he saw the way Leah effortlessly sacrificed her food for his brother. It tugged at his heart, especially when she did it thinking no one had seen her.

Travis shook his head as he stood, walking to the other side of the cabin.

“He’ll be alright, he just needs time” Natalie lowly said from where she leaned against the wall. Travis walked straight past her.

“You think you know what’s best from him?” He scoffed out as he placed his empty bowl down on the wooden table with the others. Leah looked over at Travis with concern who’s words echoed in the now quiet cabin.

“Travis…” Natalie was cut off as he turned around to face her with an angry glare.

“Quit acting like such a fucking saint. You planted the bloody clothes, you lied to me. Just say it.” Leah sat up straighter at his heated words. Natalie’s eyes watered at his harsh tone.

“I did, but only…” Natalie tried to explain herself but he cut her off again.

“You wanted me to stop looking for him” He argued. Leah watched the pair and felt a wave of anxiety rushed through her, she fiddled with her ring on her hand nervously as she watched them.

“I didn’t think that he was alive. It doesn’t make any sense that he is.” Natalie yelled back and Travis nodded at her bitterly.

“Leah knew… No, no- she didn’t know. But she kept looking anyway. She didn’t believe you and I should’ve have either” Travis yelled and Natalie scoffed looking between them with her eyebrow raised. 

Javi looked away from the pair to look at Leah who only crossed her arms anxiously. 

Travis stormed away from Natalie. He reached for the cabin’s door handle and paused when he caught Leah’s eye. He sighed and grabbed the chair he had previously been sitting on and carried it over to sit next to Leah and Javi by the window.

Leah smiled slightly, as she watched him calming down. He silently reached for her hand and allowed him to hold her colder hand. Javi sat beside them, drinking his soup and quietly shuffled closer to Leah.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

“What the fuck, Lottie?” Shauna yelled out and pushed Lottie to the ground. Leah dropped the clothes she was folding and rushed over.

“What the…? What happened?” Tai asked as she helped Lottie up.

“She was whispering weird shit to my baby” Shauna snarled and Leah side-eyed Lottie.

“I was just talking to him. It’s good to talk to them in utero.” Lottie explained and fixed her jacket’s sleeves from her fall.

“Yeah, so they learn to recognize their mothers voice.” Shauna argued.

Tai looked between Shauna and Lottie and silently sighed. “She wasn’t hurting anyone, Shauna.” 

Leah’s eyes widened and she whacked Tai's arm in disagreement.

“Wow. Okay, fuck this” Shauna gritted out and stormed out the cabin.

Leah glanced over at Travis who sat at the table next to Javi. He met her eyes and nodded, understanding her need to help her friend. Leah ran out the cabin after Shauna, with Tai not far behind her.

“Shauna, it’s freezing out here” Tai spoke up, voicing her concern but Shauna kept walking with her head down.

“Okay, yeah, you can give me the silent treatment all you want, but I’m not gonna leave you out here, even though I probably should… Am I supposed to say I’m sorry?” Tai scowled and shivered from the cold.

Shauna turned around angrily. “You’re supposed to be my friend. You’re supposed to be on my side, not Team Lottie” Leah stood beside them, hugging her arms around herself to keep warm.

“There’s one fucking team, Shauna, and we’re all on it” Tai yelled back and Shauna scoffed “You can’t think that’s still true”

‘Why does everyone run outside in the cold during arguments… Why doesn’t anyone just go to the attic… or even the shed, urgh’

“Look, I know that you’re freaked out-” Tai’s face scrunched up as Shauna interrupted her. “No, don’t do that. This is not about me being scared”

“Then what is it about?” Tai questioned. “You joined their fucking prayer club!” Shauna screamed out in anger.

“It’s not like that,” Tai shook her head. “I’m only in it because of Van. And Lottie-”

“She’s obsessed with my baby, Tai” Shauna seethed and Leah nodded.

‘She kinda is… It’s getting sorta creepy’

“Okay, so Lottie’s excited about the baby. We all are.” Tai dismissed and Leah rolled her eyes.

“No, if anyone should be excited, it’s me. But I’m rightfully freaking the fuck out about having a baby in the middle of the fucking woods, and news flash, having a bunch of psychos praying for me in some weird fucking tree cult isn’t making my life any easier.” Shauna took a shaky breath before continuing her rant. “I don’t need your fucking prayers, I need you to have my back.”

“I do” Tai muttered defensively and Shauna shook her head. “You don’t. Leah’s the only one defending me and she can’t even fucking talk!” Shauna yelled loudly and Leah shrugged in agreement.

‘Can’t exactly argue there… Or at all really.’

“I do” Tai stressed again. “But, Shauna for the first time in a really long time, I’m not afraid to fall asleep. And, yeah, you’re right, it’s probably not because I listened to the pine needles or whatever, but I’m gonna take what I can get, and I am not going to apologize for that.”

“Ow! Fuck” Shauna screamed and hunched over in pain. Leah rushed over to help her. “Shauna, are you okay?” Tai hesitantly asked and Leah looked over at her as if that was the stupidest question she’d ever heard.

Suddenly the wind picked up and the snow began falling heavier. Shauna screamed out again in pain but the sound was lost in the wind. 

“We need to get back to the cabin!” Tai yelled loudly and helped Shauna walk. Leah nodded and walked in front, silently leading the way back.

─ ⊹ ⊱꒰1996꒱⊰ ⊹ ─

Leah was leading them back when Shauna buckled and fell into the snow. “Oh my god, Shauna” Tai whispered worriedly and Leah staggered back to help her back up to her feet.

“Leah!” Travis’ voice yelled out over the wind and Leah whacked Tai’s shoulder.

“Travis! We're over here!” Tai screamed out and Travis appeared from in front of them. Leah sighed in relief and Travis guided them back to the cabin in the rising snow.

The half the group was on the porch when they returned, they rushed forward to usher them into the cabin.

“Inside, get inside” Someone muttered, and held the door open for them.

They closed the door behind them, and Shauna was still hunched over in pain.

“Is she in labor?”Akilah asked with wide eyes and Shauna let out another scream of pain.

‘Well, fuck…’

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 1 of the sinners playing as saints