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Rohan... never liked Josuke.
Like ever.
The best way he could describe their relation was 'Drake Vs Kendrick before Drake Vs Kendrick was a thing.'
Why did he hate Josuke?
Easy answer.
Because Josuke was a level ten, certified Grandmaster Baiter jerkmates addict.
Josuke even scared the ghost of the goon with his Degen behaviour.
This guy seriously pmo'ed Rohan so much he thought it had to be clip farming.
Like when Josuke burned his house down? He was a nonchalant dreadhead, he didn't care. He wasn't even mad about that.
But him opening twitch and live steaming the whole thing? Now that didn't tickly Rohan's pickle.
"Damn that fooking goner, bringing me all around Morioh to chase (Chase... like the opening to part 4? JOJO REFERENCE!) stand users."
Rohan grumbled, coming back from another crazy noisy day in his bizarre town.
"What kind of stand turns every 45 000 skin cell into lean?" Rohan said as he wiped some of the lean droplets off his arm.
"This isn't even the skibidi kind. It's the cheap (trick) shit you find at the gas station!"
Rohan said as he walked to his ancient desk, getting ready to draw his friends as pregnant furries to calm himself down until he realized something.
"I can't even hold my pen!"
He said as he watched it slip out the crack of his hands gang. 💔
"It must be all the lean. It's making my hands wetter than Ash Trevino on a typical stream."
Rohan said, attempting to dry his hands on his tralaleo tralala artist patent pending sweat rag, but all the lean droplets would come back just like how Vexbolts is coming back to the big '25.
(I know, the brainrot is stale, but what do I have to work with? Dry memes were supposed to end in march but all I have to work with is fucking cattle run 3D)
What am I supposed to do now?!"
Rohan said, letting the alpha come out, and the alpha wasn't there to play. 😈
"My hands are more slippery than the bop houses's floor before the goon fuel dries up."
Rohan mumbled, wiping all the lean on his Gucci X Barney the Dinosaur X Chanel collab pants before he got an idea.
"Hey... I've always wanted to jork it with lean, but with Dave blunts not dropping, I haven't been able to find any anywhere!"
Rohan said as he took his belt, throwing it to the ground faster than Loghan dropping Mike Tyson. (That feels wrong just writing that. Was that seriously a canon event gng?)
He made light work (no reaction) of his pants and chocolate stained boxers, leaving him as naked as Polnareff.
"Okay... now let's see what gooning fuel I have to work with."
Rohan said as he opened his computer that's older than unc himself, and started looking through every category.
"Girls...? I WANT TO SEE MEN!"
Rohan said, scoffing off the milfs and baddies to find the men. 💪
"That'sm more like it."
Rohan said as he looked through the videos.
"Step skibidi I'm stuck? No, too boring. Big chungus fills me up? No, dead meme."
Rohan narrated, talking to himself like an absolute CRAZY person.
Like who would do that, amirite Weather?
You're so right Weather, that's weird.
Ahem... where was I?
"Finally! Here's a good one!"
Rohan said, clicking on 'Bombadino Crocodino blows inside of me.'
"This is gonna be a great goon sesh."
Rohan said, already stroking his shit.
His dongle danced around happily in his hands as the sounds of explosions and crocodiles played in the background.
Rohan held his meat in his hands and he stroked his shit silly style, watching it grow to it's full 2.67 inches.
"Oh yeah, this is gonna be a good goon sesh."
Rohan said, noticing his meat had grown another .3 inches from yesterday.
"Bombadino Crocodino."
Repeated over and over on Rohan's computer, along with the sounds of explosions and moaning, and all of it was just making Rohan's gooning that much easier.
He felt the lean drip down from his hands, onto his meat where it leaked into the tip as Rohan got a taste from it downstairs. (Sorry for the disturbing visuals... what the sigma amirite?)
"You know what, even though this is that gas station shit, it's not so bad!"
Rohan said, genuinely shocked because he remembered the last time he bought shit from the gas station... Don't buy no weed from the gas station.
Rohan said as he was over here strokin' his dicc, he was horny as fuck man, he was a freak man.
"Ughhh, I like my tip sticky bro."
He said with a groan as he started pumping his finger into his dih hole. 🥀
"God dayum. The only thing that makes me feel this horny is squirrel girl!"
Rohan said as he stroked his schlong so hard, he thought it would come off, Tomorrow's teaching style.
Rohan pulled back his aged foreskin as his ancient aged smegma cascaded down his meat, making him shiver. The smell alone made Rohan want to buss.
"That's right Bombadino Crocodino... just keep busting!"
Rohan said, as he felt his goon fuel edge up on him, feeling almost as much anticipation as the Chicken Jockey scene.
Just as Rohan was groaning and moaning, as if his dih was in Lebonbon's crack, an ad suddenly popped up.
"Awe you sewious wight now wittle bwo?"
Rohan asked while still stroking his shi, but that's when he realized who was on the ad!
"MILFS OF MORIOH, LISTEN TO OUR CRIES!"
A voice that sounded like it ate rocks for breakfast rang through Rohan's computer as his eyes widened in horror.
"IS THAT FUCKING OKUYASU?!"
Rohan said as his hand involuntarily clenched around his schmeant, making him groan in pleasure, and in horror.
"What the sigma are they doing?!"
Rohan exclaimed, being more confused than the time he saw the price of the Nintendo switch 2.
"We're two Morioh rizzlers looking for milfs to goon with."
Josuke said, looking like he was barely holding back a laugh, but Okuyasu was more locked in than the locked in alien and locked in Ninja COMBINED!
"No..."
Rohan groaned, feeling himself hit the edge, he couldn't hold it back anymore, but he also couldn't goon to Okuyasu could he? He would lose so much aura! Not to mention brain cells!
And it seemed like the universe answered his calls because just before he could bussssss, 😫 the camera switched to a MASSIVE close up of Josuke's ugly mug.
Before Rohan could even react, the volcano erupted. The eclair released it's cream. Oh, and Rohan came. That too.
Rohan sat there, covered in sploodge and horror.
"Did I just... technically cum to Josuke?"
Rohan said as the ad disappeared before his eyes, leaving him more traumatized than the day he saw the ghost of the goon.
"I-I DID NOT JUST FUCKING GOON TO JOSUKE!"
Rohan exclaimed as he tried to suck the goon fuel back in, but it was too late.
You can't ungoon a goon, un-nut a nut.
"No... this can't be happening!"
Rohan said as he quickly cleaned himself up but the damage was already goon.
"That would've been the best goon in history... damn you Josuke!"
Rohan said, huffing and puffing, Josuke's smug face burned into his rotted brain.
"That's it... this means war. Gooning war."
Rohan said menacingly, standing up before comically slipping on his goon juice.
"BRO! I FINNA CRASH OUT!
Rohan yelled as if he just got knocked over when he was in the top two in Crazy cattle run 3D.
"Why the sigma would Rohan invite ME to go on a walk with him?"
Josuke muttered to himself as he posed 28'ed down the street to Rohan's house. For some strange reason, Rohan sent him a sweet letter covered in blood and gas station za, where Rohan kindly wrote 'If you don't come to my house, I'll rip your skull out of body and call bombodino crocodino to blow up your house.'
Ah, there was the sweet and demure Rohan he always knew.
Josuke stormed into Rohan's house because only beta's knock as he yelled for Rohan.
"ZEST FES- I MEAN ROHAN! WHERE THE SIGMA ARE YOU?!"
Josuke cried, trying to find Rohan.
Just then, Rohan emerged from the shadows with a grin that could on rival the grinch's when he knows knee surgery is tomorrow. (Bet you forgot about that one didn't you?)
"Hello Josuke."
Rohan said, like the total obnoxious zest fest he is.
"Hey Rohan... if this is about me burning down your house, I got 5 dono's on Twitch, so I kinda had to. You get it right?"
Josuke said like the nonchalant steakhead he is as Rohan had to fight the urge to strangle him then and there.
"No that's fine... clip farming in the big '25 seems to be the new big trend."
Rohan said casually as he invited Josuke to walk in.
"Want some lean?"
Rohan said, pulling a teacup full of lean from his pocket, offering it to Josuke.
"Sure! Is this Dave Blunt certified? I can't drink anything else."
"Just drink the fucking lean Josuke."
Rohan said as Josuke drank it down.
But it turns out, Josuke drank the lean of eepy tiredness as he started to yawn.
"Jeez... they don't make lean like they used to. Instead of getting energy, I'm all eepy now."
Josuke said like the little kawaii hampter he was as he suddenly got dizzy.
"Erm... what the sigma?"
Was the last thing he said before collapsing onto the cold ground as Rohan grinned over him.
"Sleep tight lil bro."
Rohan said as he watched Josuke close his eyes.
Rohan crouched down to Josuke as he smiled evily. First, he was planning on just chopping Josuke's lil Polnareff off, but he got a *better* idea.
"HEAVEN'S DOOR!"
Rohan said as he called Heaven's door and-
"WHERE THE SKIBIDI SLICERS AM I?!"
Josuke said as he looked around, realizing he was on Rohan's couch, with Rohan sitting across from him in the cuck chair.
"Finally you gyatt up. Looks like someone's been cranking 90's past their bedtime."
Rohan said nonchalant as he shook his dreads and drank his lean.
"I-I swear you offered me some lean, and then I-"
"Lil bro, I think you might be tripping off some gas station za, why don't you lock in and get tf out of my house?"
Rohan asked as Josuke nodded.
"Okay... nice talk (tuah) I guess."
Josuke mumbled, rubbing his head, getting a little *too* close to the page that hadn't yet closed because of Heaven's door's effect.
"What was that about?"
Josuke asked himself as his phone started ringing.
He pulled out a full sized payphone from his pocket since it does take place in 1999, and I wanted to be accurate yk.
Josuke popped 10 yen into the coin slot as he started yapping.
"You've reached Morioh's rizzler, how can I help you?"
Josuke said as he heard squeaking over the phone.
"Did I just get but dialed by a fucking mouse?"
Josuke asked until he realized it was just Koichi.
"Hey Josuke! Yukako finally trusted me enough to take off my ankle monitor, so I can leave my house!"
Koichi said excitedly, talking about his trusting, loving, not crazy girlfriend.
And you know what else is crazy?
"Oh fr? That's means we can *finally* get some skibidi slicers!"
Josuke exclaimed as Koichi agreed happily.
"So when should we go?"
Josuke asked as Coochie thought.
"Let's go now. I signed up for a crazy cattle tournament today and I don't want to be late for that."
Koichi said as Josuke nodded, or tried to as the steak glued onto the top of his head bounced off the wall of the payphone.
Um... hold on, someone's knocking on my door, screaming about their hair? 😱
Just then, Josuke heard some yelling on the other side of the phone.
"Koichi?! Who are you talking to?! You know you're 10 seconds of phone time is up!"
Yukako yelled as Koichi whispered.
"Sorry. I have to go."
Koichi said before he hung up, but not before he heard Yukako say that the pegging would be extra brutal tonight.
"Huh... I didn't know they played peggle."
Josuke said innocently as he skipped to the only restaurant in little ol Morioh that sold skibidi slices. Tonio's.
As Josuke pose 28'ed in, he saw Koichi already sitting at a table, having these weird strangulation marks that looked like someone wrapped hair around his neck?
So obviously, Josuke had NO clue who this dastardly f!end was.
"Uh Koichi? What happened to you? You look like you just ate some moldy cheese bruh."
Josuke said as Koichi shook.
"Oh it's nothing... Yukako just wanted to say bye before I left."
Koichi said as he coughed up a dark hairball onto the table as Josuke awkwardly slipped it off gng. 💔
Just then, Tonio strutted out of his kitchen, hitting that pose 28 as he smiled.
"Josuke, the short one. Hello!"
He said as he walked up to Coochie and did his famous hand grab.
"I see... your cheeks hurt? From pegging? Um... some Skibidi slicers with some drippy cheese on the side will help you perfectly!"
Tonio said as he turned to Josuke.
"And you... you've been jorking it *way* too much. All I can say it get help."
Tonio said as he wiped whatever must've been on Josuke's hands onto his apron and retreated back to the kitchen to get started on Koichi's skibidi slicers.
"Man, I have a feeling Tonio's an opp frfr."
Josuke said as Coochie blinked.
"Was he telling the truth? Have you been jaking it?"
Koichi asked as Josuke looked away.
"Look, I needed to become a Grand Master Baiter somehow! That doesn't come from occasionally stroking yo shi once in a blue moon!"
Josuke said as he shook his head.
"Look, let's just sit down okay?!"
Josuke said as they both took their seats as Coochie started yapping away about Yukako, but Josuke wasn't listening anymore.
He started to feel some pressure in his pants.
"Erm, what the sigma?"
He said to himself as he glanced down at his pants and saw his... say it with my guys, ROCK HARD COCK. 😩
"Wha- what the helly 'bron James? Why am I bricked up listening to Koichi's yapping?!"
Josuke thought as he looked back up to Coochie.
Koichi might have been cute in an abused hamster kind of way, but there was NO CHANCE he was getting bricked!
As Josuke tried to grasp the situation, he felt his hand start undoing his belt.
"No stop, stop, what are you doing?!"
Josuke said, channeling his inner multiplier as he tried to pull his hand back, but it was if it was getting controlled by some other wordly power...
Something that STANDS by you...
Josuke had no clue what supernatural entity was trying to make him molest himself!
Josuke felt his pants slip off gng, 💔 and fall to the floor as he blinked.
"Am I really doing this in a public server?"
Josuke muttered as he felt the cold air of Tonio's hit his hello kitty boxers.
"This must be the work of any enemy stand user!" Josuke said, finally locking in, and just as he was about to share his GAME THEORY with Coochie, he felt his hands pulling down in boxers.
"Fork. What the helly bo belly am I doing?!"
Josuke thought as he looked around, trying to find any stand users nearby, but all he saw was stand user Rohan staring ominously into Tonio's windows, looking through a comically large newspaper with two holes cut out for the eyes.
"Damn! There are no stand users that can manipulate your actions by say, using their stand that can force you to do certain actions! Where the sigma is this damned stand user?!"
He thought as Koichi suddenly cleared his throat.
"Uh... you good lil bro? I was just getting to the good part where Yukako cracked my skull and liquified my brains because I was talking to my sister."
Koichi said casually as Josuke coughed awkwardly.
"Oh yeah, don't worry I AM!"
Josuke said, his voice going higher than the average crazy cattle 3d fan when they lose a game as he felt his own hand involuntarily squeeze around his meaty Michael.
"Okay..."
Koichi said, awkwardly ignoring Josuke's voice crack as he went back to yapping.
"Why am I jorking it dry in Tonio's?! Stop it hand, stop it!"
Josuke thought as somewhere in Morioh, in the Kame Yu department stores, Yoshikage turned his head.
Josuke didn't want to admit it, but even thought he was stroking his shi silly style in a public server, he was disturbingly bricked up.
He was even more bricked up than the time he mixed a honey pack with a broly boost to illegally win the Jerkmates championships.
Hey, no one said becoming the Grand Master Baiter was a clean path to walk.
Josuke's hand ran up and down his rock hard cock, 😩 harshly yanking it up and down as Josuke reluctantly groaned.
"Is everything really okay Josuke...? Did you miss your favorite episode of the talk tuah podcast?"
Coochie asked as Josuke feverishly shook his head to distract Koichi from the shaking under the table.
"No! I'm just... hungry that's it! But I should've known not to go to Tonio's. He's never served me once."
Josuke said since his problems were either jorking it too much or hair related, which Tonio just prescribed him gorilla glue to make sure his hair, it don't move.
(Is that grammar right? No. Did I make a reference though? Yup)
At this point, Josuke was working himself so well he wanted to just lean back in his seat and enjoy the feeling, but he had a sneaking suspicion, that for some odd reason, Koichi might just judge him.
"Okay Josuke are you SURE you're fine?"
Koichi asked, getting a bit worried at how violently the table was thudding.
"Yee... YEAHahahH!~"
Josuke squealed in a broken cry, finally hitting his Obfuscation. I mean orgasm.
"W-WHAT THE SIGMA?!"
Koichi yelled as Josuke Josu'ed everywhere.
"Okay I'va got your skibidi sli- AAAAAAAAAAAH!"
Tonio yelled, noticing the sploodge all over his tables.
"MAMA MIA! SPAGHETTINI! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO MY RESTAURANT YOU GOONER?!"
Tonio screeched, grabbing the nearest can of nitrus, getting ready to slam it down onto Josuke's head but he quickly pulled his pants up along with his hello kitty boxers and nigerundayo'ed right out of there.
"Oh... what the sigma was that?! Why did I stark jorkin it?!"
Josuke said as if he was an Instagram reels commenter as Tonio yelled just about ever slur in the Italian dictionary at Josuke.
Josuke ran as if he was trying not to miss the Nintendo 2 pre-order.
"God... I think I've spent so much time on Jerkmates that my hand was just moving from pure muscle memory."
Josuke muttered, a bit annoyed he went on that 37 hour Jerkmates binge yesterday, instead of stopping at his usual 36.
Just as Josuke was awkwardly trying to recover from his jerking misadventures, he suddenly felt his legs carrying himself around Morioh.
"W-woah, what the sigma? Are my legs detecting a milf nearby?"
Josuke said to his legs as they carried him off to a... hospital?
"A hospital? What the sigma? Am I visiting the ghost of the goon or something?"
Josuke muttered to himself as he walked in, walking up to some receptionist.
"Ooh, now *that's* a milf."
Josuke said as his legs walked up to her.
"Can I help you?"
She asked lethargically.
Josuke was about to go rizzing up the level 10, but his mouth moved faster than his brain could.
"Can I go to room 525?"
Josuke asked as on the inside, the two wolves inside of him panicked.
"That is NOT what I meant to say!"
The white wolf said as the black wolf scoffed.
"Are you sure? Because I'm sure a sissy like you would back out at the last second and ask to go to some random ass room."
The black wolf said as the white wolf growled.
"Says you!"
"Says me!"
Both wolves said as they both started to violently maul each other.
"D-did you just say room 525?"
She asked as she started to back away, remembering the last time a dwarf walked into her hospital and asked about going to room 525.
"S-STAY AWAY FROM ME!"
The receptionist cried as she ran away, acting as if she just saw the price for the Nintendo switch 2.
"I-is my rizz that bad?"
Jouske mumbled as his feet carried him to the elevator and all the way to room 525.
He glanced at the door, not wanting to walk in but his feet said otherwise, so he just tried to lock in.
"Y-Yuya?! What are you doing here?"
Josuke asked as he entered as Yuya blinked, lying there in the hospital bed with that giant ass diaper on cause he snapped his dih.💔
"What am *I* doing here?! This is MY hospital room that I'm in because you beat the shit out of me!"
Yuya said with a huff, annoyed at how he was stuck there instead of being with the huzz.
"What are YOU doing here lil bro?"
Yuya asked as Josuke sputtered. He really had no clue why his dogs had brought him here in the first place.
"I... don't really know."
Josuke mumbled as Yuya scoffed.
"Well if you don't know... then GET OU-"
Yuya exclaimed, and Josuke would've happily turned around right then and there, but then his feet carried him to Yuya's bed.
"Erm, what the helly Cyrus are you doing?"
Yuya asked as Josuke's hands locked in and started undoing his MASSIVE diaper as if he was Johnny or something.
(And you know what else is massive?)
((Yes I'm still dragging it in the big '25))
Josuke was about to say 'I don't know! This must be a stand attack!' but all that came out of his mouth was
"I'm boutta stretch your meat lil bro."
Josuke said as they BOTH widened their eyes, blinking in disbelief.
"Y-you're gonna WHAT?!"
Yuya exclaimed as Josuke tried to correct himself, say he wasn't about to jork him off, ANYTHING!
"You heard me. This is just an apology for beating you up after you said you didn't unfollow Vexbolts."
Josuke said as he groaned on this inside.
"Ughhhh, what the hellyionte am I saying?! This MUST be the work of an enemy stand user!"
Josuke thought as he looked around, but he only saw a suspiciously Rohan shaped nurse staring at him through the door.
"But there are no stand users around! Is it a long ranged stand?!"
Josuke thought as he suddenly froze.
He felt something... meaty.
And Michael-y.
"I'm touching your dick right now aren't I?"
Josuke said that Disney channel ahh line as Yuya nodded.
"Y-yeah."
Yuya said before locking in.
"I didn't know you felt that bad, and my huzz all still have to get out of class so... I guess you're the next best thing!"
Yuya exclaimed as Josuke blinked.
"Isn't it Saturday?"
"Yeah, but they're taking OTHER classes on how to be the perfect females for an ALPHA MALE like me."
Yuya said with a nonchalant chuckle.
"Just shut the fuck up and let me jork you."
Josuke said as he used Crazy Diamond to heal Yuya's broken meat and started stroking it right away.
"Jeez... your hands are so soft."
Yuya groaned as somewhere in Morioh, one Yoshikage Kira who was walking to his house on the northeast side of Morioh paused, staring into the orange skies, as if something was calling his name.
"Come on Josuke, I've gooned better to ((PUT UGLY BRAINROT HERE)), you can do better than this! Dattebayo!"
Yuya said, using the power of friendship to inspire Josuke to unlock his true gooning potential.
"Right! Believe it!"
Josuke said, without the effects of whatever stand was attacking, just being so inspired by Yuya's words.
Josuke nodded as he started to bop it! Twist it! Pull it! Which got a whole bunch of cries from Yuya.
"Oh yeah... fuck, that's the stuff!"
Yuya said with a groan as he leaned into Josuke's hand as killer started playing in the background.
"What the sigma am I doing?!"
Josuke screamed in his mind while still splonking Yuya's shit silly style.
"Oh yeah... I might just start forgiving you~!
Yuya said as he would squirm and groan, but all his bones were more liquified than lunchly nacho cheese.
"Ugh, the only way this could be better was if you stuck your toe in my dih hole."
Yuya said, since he obviously has a foot fetish and you can't tell me otherwise.
"Okay."
Josuke said simply as he took of the Jay's 🥶 and placed them onto the ground.
"F-fr?! Wow! I'm *actually* getting a footjob from THE Josuke!"
Yuya said teasingly as he looked down at Josuke's sock.
"Ah- are you wearing your sock inside out?"
Yuya asked as he raised his eyebrow and Josuke sputtered.
"Yeah... what about it?"
Josuke said defensively as Yuya shrugged.
"Nothing. Only weird 33 year old men would be bothered by it."
Yuya said as Josuke groaned in his house, getting a flashing headache.
"What is up with today?!"
Kira said as he just tried to enjoy testing the horse race with his girlfriend.
Josuke sat on Yuya's bed, lifting his foot as he flexed his tootsies, making Yuya groan.
"Gyatt, stop edging me you sussy baka and just put that toe jam on my bread."
Yuya said, instantly loosing all his aura as Josuke died inside, but on the outside, he stroked Yuya's dick with his foot.
"Oh that's the stuff~"
Yuya moaned as he felt Josuke's socked foot rub under his smegma build, smearing that cheese as if it was a lunchly nacho set.
"You like that Yuya?"
Josuke asked involuntarily as Yuya nodded, so sure.
"YES~"
Yuya exclaimed.
"Are you sure?"
Josuke asked as the invincible card popped up.
Josuke kept awkwardly rubbing his foot on Yuya's schmongle, but Yuya was acting as if he just ate a honey pack mixed with a broly boost with a sprinkle of drippy cheese on the side.
"I... don't think I'll make it much longer gng." 💔
Yuya said with a moan as Josuke shoved his foot into Yuya's meat hole, making Yuya shake as if someone was bumpin that Fetty wap on that JBL speaker.
"I-IMBATTAKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!"
Yuya screeched as he came all over Josuke's sock as Josuke died a little inside.
Yuya sat there, panting, trying to catch his breath like he just got slimed.
"You... you don't think I could suck the coom off your feet could I?"
Yuya asked jokingly, thinking that Josuke would reject his request since it was a little... crazy.
You know what else is crazy?
"Ok. Suck them all you'd like."
Josuke said as he cursed whatever EEEVIL stand user was bringing all this suffering to him. Whoever was doing this was obviously a cruel stranger, someone he obviously DIDN'T know.
He sighed as he just tried to ignore the Rohan shaped nurse still staring at him as his hands moved on his own, taking off his sock and bringing it up to Yuya's mouth as he immediately latched onto that thing, throating it down as if it was Aiscream flavored. 🥺
(Ruby chan? Haii?~ Nani- okay let's just get on with the story)
Yuya was licking that foot just like how Kira licked his last girlfriend's hand, groaning loudly in pleasure.
"This is like the best day ever."
Yuya mumbled, but since his mouth was stuffed with foot, all that came out was: "Mfnksmf mdmfa mfkaokpap fko kam."
Josuke just awkwardly nodded, feeling Yuya's tongue slip into his toe cracks. 💔
"Just keep sucking."
Josuke's mouth said, moving on it's own as both of the heavily mauled wolves inside of Josuke agreed that the only person losing more aura in this situation was Yuya.
Yuya was suctioned onto Josuke's foot as if he was sucking on a baby bottle filled with lean.
Yuya's drool leaked down Josuke's foot and onto the bed as suddenly, the door slammed open.
"YUYA~ We're back from our classes and ready to serve our alpha!"
The huzz said, walking in as they froze at the scene.
Josuke standing over Yuya as Yuya desperately sucked on Josuke's foot, naked from the waist down. (Nah but imagine that cause I'm laughing while thinking of that)
"Y-YUYA! WE'LL SAVE YOU!"
The huzz said cluelessly as they started smacking Josuke with their wooden swords.
"A-AH!"
Josuke exclaimed as one of the smacks sent him falling off the hospital bed as his gyatt shielded him from hitting the ground too harshly.
"Get out of here! And don't touch our precious Yuya ever again!"
The huzz #1 said as huzz #2 and #3 agreed.
"Now... GET OU-"
They all yelled as Josuke NIGERUNDAYO'ED outta there.
Josuke huffed and puffed, running out of that hospital faster than Joseph ran out of Tomoko's life.
"What the sigma is happening today?! This is insane!"
Josuke said, confused about this crazy noisy bizarre day he was having.
"I-I've gyatt to get home."
Josuke said as he started walking home, looking over his shoulder every few seconds as if cheap trick was on his back.
He *almost* arrived home safe, but all of a sudden, he heard the town's biggest zaza smoker call out his name.
"OI! JOSUKE!" Okuyasu called out in his cutesty Y/N voice as Josuke groaned.
Why couldn't he just get home today?!
"Hey Okuyasu..."
Josuke said with a weak smile.
"Wanna come over? I got marvel rivals."
Okuyasu said as Josuke grinned.
"Only if I can be Emma frost."
"Obviously. So that leaves Squirrel girl for me."
Okuyasu said with a grin, being the SECOND biggest goner in Morioh.
Of course, Josuke wanted to go back home, but he also couldn't pass up a good round of a gooning game with Okuyasu.
They both pose 28'ed to Okuyasu's house, and then to his room.
"Here, you get the spongebob controller."
Okuyasu said, giving Josuke the controller with aura.
They sat down as Josuke tried to forget about this whole day.
He was safe in Okuyasu's house that was breaking down, creaky, and the ceiling tiles that fell every few seconds.
Mhm. Totally safe.
They sat on the ground as Josuke ignored the rusty nails sticking out of the ground as Okuyasu booted up the game.
"Oh yeah, come to papi chullo."
Okuyasu said, licking his lips like sonic 2017 x, staring holes into squirrel girl.
"Emma frost is better."
Josuke said with a grin as they eached picked their favorite gooning characters and started playing.
Everything was going fine right at first, both of them crashing out whenever they lost to a little fuck ass shark, but all of a sudden, Josuke felt his hand twitch and move to his belt.
"No... not again!"
Josuke exclaimed as he looked around, frantically trying to see if there was any stand user nearby, but all he saw was Rohan staring through Okuyasu's window from a tree with binoculars.
There were not stand users nearby!
Josuke tried to calm down, but he could feel himself undoing his belts once more.
He had ran some duo jerkmate matches with Okuyasu, but he had never jorked his penits in front of him before!
"S-shit! What the sigma is Okuasu gonna think?! He's gonna think I'm some creepy goner!"
Josuke thought but he could already feel his Meaty Michael slip into his hands.
"OHHH NOOO!"
Josuke said in his mind as he started feeling himself pump his meat for the second time that day. His shi prolly looks drier than Jake Paul's bank account after the Coffeezilla lawsuit.
Josuke clenched his eyes shut, tighter than Ash Trevino before she found out what prisons were.
He started huffing and sweating nervously, worrying about what Okuyasu would say, but then he heard Okuyasu started to yap.
"WOW ARE YOU REALLY JORKIN IT DURING OUR MARVE RIVALS MATCH?! YOU'RE MILKING YOURSELF, YOU'RE MILKING YOUSELF!"
Okuyasu screamed with an amused smile as Josuke blinked.
"What the sigma...? You aren't disturbed?"
Josuke asked as Okuyasu laughed.
"Why would I be? You're the Grand Master Baiter! Of course you'd need to practice."
Okuyasu said as Josuke grinned. He remembered, Okuyasu was there with him, playing duo's until Josuke finally became the Grand Master Baiter.
Okuyasu watched Josuke jork his jerky (say that five times fast) until he nervously wiped out his OWN meat.
It was like... a meatception.
They both silently jerked their chickens to Marvel Rivals as Josuke moaned as if little phoebe was under the table. 🥀
Everything was going well until Okuyasu suddenly turned to Josuke.
"Bro... can I slurp your meat until you bust? But like... in a not gay way since I have socks on?"
Okuyasu asked as Josuke's eyes widened larger than the time he learned Loghan and Jake paul were two different people. (I still can't tell the difference apparently. Their names are practically interchangeable in my stories)
"F-fr? B fr rn lttl vro."
Josuke said as Okuyasu nodded. For a second, he thought Okuyasu could ALSO be under the effects of some freaky ahh stand, but none of that mattered as he started yapping.
"Sure. You better get that mouth open little phoebe and take my luchly stackable."
Josuke said as he pulled Okuyasu's chopped ass cut and shoved onto HIS dick as Okuyasu spit on that thang. 🔥
Okuyasu gyatt to work, slobbering on Josuke's lil Josk as he coughed and sputtered.
"That's right... be a good kitten for zaddy."
Josuke said as he kept moving Okuyasu as Okuyasu drooled all over as it pooled onto his crotch.
"Lick it up beetch."
Josuke said as if he was 3 freeze as he tore Okuyasu off his meat, that was now redder than a Lunchly pepperoni and brought Okuyasu down to his crotch instead.
"Okay my papi chullo."
Okuyasu said, being a submissive little beta male, absolutely trapped by Josuke's aura farming.
He lowered his head as he began licking up his own saliva as if it was lean. (I just realized how disgusting that would be... oh well)
"Keep going you little slut."
Josuke said before realizing he was in a stretched weather story as he let the brainrot infect in.
"I mean, keep slobbering on my meaty Michael lil bro. Gyatt dayum, I wish I could clip this chat."
Josuke said as Okuyasu obliged, now nibbling at Josuke's dih as if he was little phoebe.
"A-ah~"
Josuke said as he let out a moan from being bitten even louder than the time he realized that Lunchly would be coming to Japan and he could finally try that new famous drippy cheese bruh.
"Dih to yo mouth, spell go."
Josuke said as Okuyasu squealed.
"JUST SLIP IT IN GNG 🥀"
Okuyasu said as he happily opened his mouth, allowing Josuke's 5.84309 inch meat tickle the half eaten skibidi slices in his mouth since I know my boy does NOT brush his teeth.
His toothbrush is probably nastier than asmongold's room.
"T-this taste amazing! They should make this the new prime flavor!"
Okuyasu said as as he grabbed the rest of Josuke's meat that he couldn't swallow and jorked it since he was nothing more than a lowly beta.
"Oh mai gawd..."
Josuke moaned, channeling his inner Osaka.
"I'm boutta... IMBATTAKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM~"
Josuke said as he morbe- I mean Joske'd all over Okuyasu, shooting seed into his throat faster than Dr. Disrespect removed the word minor from his apology.
Josuke collapsed onto his back as if he just finished his 30th round in a row of jerkmates, and by this point, he might as well have.
He was exhausted from the constant jorking and jerking he was doing today, but Okuyasu's comment woke him the hell up.
"Um... I'm off the pill papi Josuke." Okuyasu said with innocent hampter eyes as Josuke immediately got to his feet, ignoring the fact that Okuyasu is a dude and the fact he nutted in Okuyasu's mouth, AND NIGERUNDAYO'ED THE HELL OUT OF THERE.
Like father like son amirite?
Josuke huffed and puffed, pulling his pants up while stumbling on the streets of morioh.
"CAN THIS DAY GET ANY WORSE?!"
Josuke asked as a piano comically fell from on his hea- okay jkjk.
Josuke SOMEHOW mangaged to stumble back home, practically falling onto the ground as he sighed.
"THANK YOU! I'M HOME!"
Josuke exclaimed as he lifted himself off the ground and happily strolled into the living room where he groaned.
"Yare yare daze... these people really need to lock their doors..."
Jotaro, JoJo's nonchalantest dreadhead said as he sat idoly on Josuke's chair.
"U-um Mr. Jotaro? What are you doing here?"
Josuke asked curiously as Jotaro looked up from his ominous and emo brooding.
"Oh, I was waiting for YOU!"
He said as he stood up.
"Look, there's been a report of a rat in Morioh."
Jotaro said as Josuke blinked.
"So?"
"It's eating all the ube cupcakes!"
Jotaro exclaimed as Josuke's eyes widened.
"Oh no! Now where will the girls with eyebrow slits go now?!"
Josuke said as Jotaro nodded.
"Exactly. This is a very pressing situation, and we've gyatt to go, NOW!"
Jotaro said as he started walking to the door, and Josuke was about to follow him out, but his body had other plans.
He reached out and grabbed Jotaro's wrist as Jotaro turned around.
"What the sigma are you doing? There are ube cupcakes and eyebrow slit girlies that need to be saved."
Jotaro said as Josuke looked down at the ground, channeling his shy kawaii anime girl side.
"Before you do that... can you pound my cheeks until they're as red as the go save Riley filter?"
Josuke asked innocently as they both froze.
"FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! DID I JUST SAY THAT TO MY NEPHEW?! DOES THAT MAKE *ME* THE PREDATOR?!"
Josuke thought and Jotaro turned to him, making him think that he was about to get curbstomped, his eyes widened as he realized that Jotaro was actually... kissing him?! (Kiss, like Ermes's stand? JOJO REFERENCE!)
"Oh my gyatt... you have no clue how long I've been waiting for you to say that."
Jotaro muttered as he went back to shoving his tongue into Josuke's throat, moving his tongue like it was the blue shirt guy dancing his heart out.
Josuke felt pretty embarrassed, but he didn't mind the feeling. Having such a usally nonchalant dreadhead sucking the lean out of his mouth was starting to give him a... rock hard cock. 😩
"MmmMmMMmmm~ oh Josuke, I wanna eat you up like a lunchly."
Jotaro groaned as he led the both of them to the couch, wwe dropping Josuke before practically tackling him.
"Now take off your clothes lil bro. Let the alpha give you exactly what you asked for."
Jotaro said as Josuke nodded, now *he* was the little beta cuck.
He quickly took off all his swag he got from aldi and lied down patiently under Jotaro as he took his stuff off.
"Um... Jotaro, aren't you gonna take off your hat?"
He asked curiously, raising his hand to his hat as Jotaro slapped his hand away.
"Don't. Mess. With. The. Hat."
Jotaro said bluntly, and before Josuke could ask why, he was already being flipped over and getting his cheeks spread.
"Dih to yo crack, say one bad thing about your hair."
Jotaro said as Josuke cried, feeling like he was being edged.
"Just slip it in gng. 💔"
Josuke said as Jotaro happily obliged, being all nasty and licking two of his fingers before plunging them into Josuke's pulsing chocolate starfish.
"K-KYA!"
Josuke said, not ready for the fingers going diver down into him, but the feeling wasn't bad. It was like putting on a fresh pair of underwear of new years day.
"Can we talk about the political and economic state of the world right now?!"
Josuke sputtered, trying to get used to Jotaro's star finger, but Jotaro wasn't one for patience.
"The lion doesn't concern itself to the please of the sheep."
Jotaro said as he shoved two MORE fingers in, now making it so that there were four fingers buried deep inside Josuke.
"F-four?"
Mista said as he looked around.
"Is something wrong Mista?"
A young Bucciarati asked Mista as he shook his head.
"No... it's nothing."
Mista said as it returned back to Morioh, now seeing Jotaro grin."
"Girl, I kno u wan dis dih."
Jotaro said as just before Josuke could (Lucy) steel his nerves, Jotaro shoved his 47 foot dong into Josuke.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!"
Josuke said, obviously enjoying the new sensation in his cheeks.
"Just keep screaming for me."
Jotaro said nonchalantly, gaining aura as he rocked his hips back and forth, burying his dongle deeper into Josuke.
"Hah, hah~"
Josuke said as he panted, trying to ignore the fact that Jotaro's meat was completely mogging him right now.
"K-KEEP GOING PAPI!"
Josuke squealed out, losing so much aura but he didn't care, he was addicted to the feeling of Jotaro's MASSIVE meat.
(And do you kno-)
"You don't have to tell me twice."
Jotaro said with a grin as he grinded his hips even further, hitting Josuke's J spot as he moaned.
"AaAaaAaA~"
Josuke said as if he was tryna sing or smth, but all he was doin was taking Jotaro's dih.
Jotaro's fingers pushed into Josuke's hips as his eyes rolled back and he looked out the window, seeing a weird, manga artist shaped silhouette standing out the window, watching him like how Kira was watching Hayato take a bath.
Josuke couldn't worry about that right now as he felt a hot flash run through him, even hotter than Ksi's music career. 🔥
"IMBATANUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUT!"
(Switichin it up for y'all)
Josuke said as he blew a FAT load all over the couch, and Jotaro followed, not bothering to pull out and instead, just exploding into Josuke.
Jotaro panted, but since he was constantly aura farming, he didn't collapse onto the couch like Josuke, instead he just stood up, pulled his pants back into place and pulled out a cigarette.
"Yare yare daze... not bad."
Jotaro muttered as he lit it, staring off into space and instantly gaining 1000+ aura.
"I forgot why I was here in the first place."
Jotaro said as Josuke blinked.
Yeah that's right, why *did* Jotaro come here anyways?
"Something about cupcakes...?"
Josuke mumbled as Jotaro shook his head.
"Wait... how old are you?"
Jotaro asked as he raised his eyebrow.
"16?"
Josuke replied as Jotaro's jaw dropped.
"No... no. I can't be an edp! I promise I don't like cupcakes!"
Jotaro yelled to no one as Josuke blinked.
"What, you're fine with incest, but pedophilia is where you draw the line?!"
Josuke said with a huff as Jotaro nodded.
"Yes! And here *I* thought I was a saint, waiting until Annie turned 18, and yet you just ruined all that."
Jotaro said as Josuke blinked.
"Who's Annie?"
Josuke asked as Jotaro scoffed.
"Just some side character. But I copped a feel early and new there was potential."
Jotaro said, licking his lips at the memory as Josuke sat there.
"Get out."
Josuke said bluntly as Jotaro picked his stuff.
"Gladly."
Jotaro replied, running out of there faster than you could say nigerundayo.
Only after Jotaro left did Josuke remember why he was there in the first place.
"Crap... what's gonna happen to all those poor ube cupcakes?"
Josuke mumbled as he got himself dressed.
"I've gyatt to do something."
Josuke said as he thought of who to ask for help.
"I can't ask Jotaro now... and Okuyasu is probably still recovering form this ferocious dih."
Josuke said, thinking of his options. They were incredibly low, so that's how he landed on the doorsteps of
"Rohan? Are you there?"
Josuke asked, ringing the doorbell once, then twice, then thrice, but making sure not to ring it a fourth time, much to Mista's happiness.
The door ominously opened once more as Josuke freely walked in.
"ROHAN!"
He called out as he heard a voice from upstairs.
"I'm in my office Josuke, just walk in."
Rohan said as Josuke walked into his office which was *so* not a trap.
"Rohan? Where are yOU?!"
Josuke asked, his voice getting higher as he saw Rohan. Sitting in his chair, pants down with a devious grin.
"Why hello Josuke. Had a fun day today?"
Rohan asked as Josuke's two braincells rubbed together.
"It was you?! How could I have known?!"
Josuke asked, shocked by Rohan's super top secret evil plan.
"But why?!"
Josuke demanded as Rohan laughed.
"Because! I'm tired of you! It's always 'gooning' this and 'edging' that. So I'm just giving you what you want."
Rohan said as Josuke ran up with crazy diamond, only to get sent to his knees by Heaven's door.
"When you came over earlier today, I wrote that I could control *all* of your actions!"
Rohan said as he smacked Josuke lightly.
"Now... if you're so interested in gooning, why don't you be a good little baka and suck my schmeat?"
Rohan asked innocently as Josuke growled as if HE was the alpha in this scenario.
"I'll kill you Rohan..."
Josuke muttered but Rohan tsk'ed.
"Ah ah ah. That doesn't sound like slurping. Get on with it little bro."
Rohan said, doing the famous Edgeworth dread shake as Josuke suddenly felt this unexplainable urge to suck Rohan off!
He slowly moved his mouth to Rohan's crotch, bitting at the skin as Rohan sighed.
"Ugh I have to admit, you're pretty good at edging people."
Rohan said as Josuke cherry licked Rohan's boxers, taking a lesson from his goat Kakyoin.
He left a MASSIVE wet spot on Rohan's boxers as Rohan grinned.
"Come on, beg me for dis dih."
Rohan said, mogging Josuke so hard that he just HAD to comply.
"P-please let me have your rock hard cock. 😩 Please, you're the supreme sigma male and a man with negative aura like me would be glad to take your meaty Michael!"
Josuke said, his mouth moving faster than he could stop it.
"Oh well, since you asked SO NICELY."
Rohan said as he pulled his boxers down as Josuke's eyes widened.
Rohan's dih was... not 30 feet long. Was this actually a stretched weather story?
It was only 5 inches, maybe .9294981 extra, but that was just Josuke's crude guess.
"Well? What are you waiting for lil bro? For Ksi to drop anything better than Thick of It? That won't be happening any soon so GET TO SUCKING!"
Rohan exclaimed as Josuke reluctantly took Rohan's dick into his mouth and slowly started sucking.
"Man why're edging me?! Get too gooning Mr. Grand Master Baiter!"
Rohan said, commanding Josuke as he shoved him down on his meat, Josuke's hair keeping him from taking the whole thing.
Josuke started to suck faster, bobbing his head up and down but making sure to keep his hair in place. He might have been sucking the dick of his enemy, but he had to make sure the hair was still EATING.
"This isn't enough..."
Rohan said, summoning his inner Kendrick as he started rocking his hips up, thrusting himself into Josuke.
"I can't believe I have to help the Grand Master Baiter suck someone off. How did you even make it past one Jerkmate's round?!"
Rohan said, degrading Josuke as if even being around Josuke was making Rohan lose aura.
"Start touching me lil bro... your mouth isn't enough."
Rohan commanded as Josuke's hands wandered on Rohan, feeling him as if he was made out of pure lunchly nacho cheese.
"Oh yeah, that's the stuff."
Rohan said with a soft groan as he huffed.
"Start licking it as if my meat was lean flavored~"
Rohan said with a coo as Josuke huffed. All these orders were driving him crazy!
(And do you know what else is crazy?)
Josuke couldn't do anything though, because his tongue snaked around Rohan's dick, licking and slorping it up.
"Oh my gyatt Josuke... keep going, KEEP GOING~"
Rohan said with a moan as he practically smashed his crotch into Josuke's face.
All Josuke could do was murmur and hope Rohan could be hit with the curse of rah or SOMETHING to get him out of this situation.
But no, all that happened was him sucking harder and harder as Rohan cried louder and louder.
"OHHH YEAH, THAT'S THE STUFF! I THINK I'M GONNA... I'M BOUTTA... IMBATTAKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAM!!!"
Rohan said as Josuke was practically drowned, the sploodge being so much that it went out through Josuke's *nose.*
Josuke flew back as he coughed and sputtered, wanting to vomit but not wanting to face Rohan's wrath.
Rohan was sitting at his chair, panting and huffing as he sighed.
"Heaven's door has released his grip on you."
Rohan said with a weak flick of the wrist.
"You aren't bad for a mere goner. Now GET OU-"
Rohan cried as Josuke happily left, now knowing that a lot more people were okay with being jerked off by Josuke than he was comfortable with.
And since Josuke forgot to ask Rohan to kill the rat, bug eaten slowly took over Morioh, turning everyone into gelatinous meat cubes.
The
end.