Chapter Text
Chapter One
And the vision that was planted in my brain
Still remains
within the sound of silence
December
“It’s just for a few days, really, I don’t see what the fuss is about,” her mother told her when Cissy complained about being uprooted from their countryside manor to her cousins’ new home on Grimmauld Place for the holiday break. Her parents had proceeded to spend the days leading up to Christmas locked away in the study with Auntie Walburga and Uncle Orion, silencing charms on the door, steadfastly ignoring their children unless a situation arose which called on them to be punished, something Narcissa was immensely grateful her own parents did not do.
The children were left to their own devices. Bellatrix, Narcissa’s older sister, was deeply annoyed by their younger cousin Sirius (and pretty much everyone in general), so she spent as much time as she could running around London with her boyfriend, and she would often come home in late hours of the night.
Andromeda, the eldest sister, no longer lived with them (she’d been kicked out of the family for marrying a muggle-born), but her presence lived on as Sirius spent the days leading up to Christmas listening to Andromeda’s old muggle records in his bedroom. They all knew it would piss off their parents if he was caught, but for Sirius, that was part of the fun. Regulus, also quieter and more timid than his older sibling, frequently disappeared, and she didn’t know where. This left Narcissa to fend for herself.
Narcissa spent her days wandering around the old house, weirded out by the portraits of long dead Black ancestors and even more weirded out by the heads of old house elves stuck up on the walls. She had found a room full of cursed items (a bracelet that made a boiling sound, a pocket watch that followed her around the room, a hand that had tried to grab her when she got too close). She had found the house elf’s unfortunate den underneath a cellar sink, retching at the stench. And she had found a hand mirror in an upstairs bathroom that talked back to her when she spoke to it, giving her compliments about her long black hair and sky-blue eyes, which she thought was nice.
It wasn’t until Christmas Eve that she came across the library. The portrait on the wall just next to the door, some great-great-grandparent with graying hair, was asleep, so she pushed the door open and was surprised to find a tower with miles of books stretching up toward the sky. The circular walls were lined in books of all sizes and colors, and armchairs and couches were scattered throughout the different floors.
She dragged her hand along the railing as she began to walk up, around and around, until she eventually came across Regulus, curled up on a green armchair like a cat next to a roaring fireplace, his black curls hanging like a curtain over the book he was reading.
“Extension charm,” he said as he sat up, reading her expression. “They add new levels as they get new books.”
“Great hiding place,” she said.
“I’m not hiding,” Regulus replied. “I’m just waiting out the break.”
She nodded and sat down on the floor next to the armchair. The heat of the fireplace was intense, and she was suddenly quite dizzy. “Your mother sent me to come find you. She said it’s time to get ready for this evening.”
“Is Bella’s boyfriend coming? The one who’s a bit nuts?” Regulus asked.
“Yeah. He’s getting a bit intense with all the Dark Lord stuff, isn’t he?” She leaned against Regulus’ chair and closed her eyes. She must have gotten lightheaded from climbing the stairs.
“Everyone is,” Regulus replied. He was sitting up in the chair now, hand holding his place in his closed book. “What do you think our parents have been up to in Dad’s office all week?”
Narcissa shrugged. She opened her eyes again, but blackness was encroaching on her vision, and soon she couldn’t see at all.
“They asked me to join them,” Regulus said quietly into the silence.
Narcissa said nothing. She felt incapable of speaking as a scene began to play out in the darkness. Shadowy figures gathered near flames, centered around one figure lying prone on the floor. The vision cleared as quickly as it came, leaving her heart pounding and an uneasy feeling in her stomach.
Regulus was still talking as she returned back to her normal self. “Bella was pushing for it, but Mum said I have to wait.”
Narcissa took several deep breaths before she replied. “I think you got lucky.” She stood up slowly and brushed off her hands on her skirt. She was desperate to get out of the library and back into the cool air of the rest of the house. What the fuck had just happened? “I wouldn’t say this to anyone else, obviously, but I think they’re a bit over the top with all the pureblood shit. Doesn’t seem worth getting mixed up with.”
“I’m not sure we get a choice, Cissy,” Regulus said, standing up and setting the book gently down on the armchair. “Hey, are you okay?” She wondered if she looked as dreadful as she felt.
“I’m fine. It’s just warm in here, that’s all.”
Regulus sighed and led them out of the library toward the upstairs bedrooms.
* * *
That evening, the Black extended family and their parents’ closest friends gathered around the long dining room table. Garland was draped around the chandelier, and quiet Christmas carols played in the background. Kreacher and Dobby, the Malfoy family’s House Elf, were quietly making their way along the table serving drinks as guests were beginning their first course. Narcissa, dressed in a dark green dress and patent leather heels, hair falling in dark waves down her back, was seated between Regulus and Sirius. Her cousin Evan was sitting across the table from her next to his own parents, looking quite nice in his emerald green dress robes, and she recognized a few other faces from Hogwarts. She spoke a little to Evan’s parents, her aunt Esmerelda and uncle Ignatius, about school (she had achieved the top score in her class on her strengthening solution, and she was struggling with Gamp's Law of Elemental Transfiguration), but mostly she listened. A bit of talk about the Dark Lord between Bellatrix’ boyfriend Rodolphus and her parents, a bit of chatter about taking “The Dark Mark” between the Selwyns and the Crouches. And suddenly, she heard Uncle Orion tapping his knife against his glass and clearing his throat.
“A toast,” the man said, a tall and imposing figure in his dark dress robes, “to the Dark Lord, the one who will restore the wizarding world to its former greatness.”
Everyone raised their glass except Sirius. Narcissa nudged him, but he stared at her, resolutely. Bellatrix shot daggers at Sirius across the table, and Narcissa turned back to face Orion.
“The Dark Lord,” everyone responded, raising their glasses in response. Narcissa mumbled along before taking a deep sip of her wine.
It wasn’t until she heard a screech of “Auntie Walburga!” that she noticed that both Sirius and Bellatrix had disappeared from the table. Walburga and Orion stood up and moved quickly toward the door, Reggie and his sniveling friend Bartemius right behind them. Narcissa stood up and followed tentatively in their footsteps. They stepped up a moving staircase and ended up in the library. Inside, nearby the blazing fireplace, was Sirius, defensively holding his hands out against Bellatrix. He looked cornered. Bella stood over him, wand pointed directly at his chest. Narcissa felt lightheaded as she noticed Regulus’ book from earlier resting on the armchair by the fire and thought of her vision.
“He took the name of the Dark Lord in vain,” Bellatrix snarled.
“Sirius?” Auntie Walburga asked sharply. Narcissa was having trouble breathing. Surely Sirius’ parents would put a stop to this? Surely Bella wouldn’t actually hurt their cousin, the one who had grown up with them, close as siblings?
Sirius didn’t say anything, just looked at Bella with wide, dark eyes. He had hair across his face but he didn’t dare move.
Uncle Orion spoke up. “Well, boy, does your loyalty lay with purebloods? With the Dark Lord and his commitment to eliminate contaminated blood from the Wizarding World?”
“‘Contaminated blood’? Surely–”
He was cut off by Orion, who said quietly, in anger, “Don’t play stupid.” Next to him, Bellatrix, eyes crazed with emotion, rolled up her sleeve and shoved it toward Sirius. A snake crawling out of a skull gleamed on her arm.
“Swear your allegiance,” Bella said, her voice low and dangerous. “Swear it.”
“No!” Sirius shouted, scrambling backward and stumbling to the floor. “I’m not going to swear anything to that murderer.”
“Swear it, and the Dark Lord will protect you. He will save you from the path you are on,” Aunt Walburga said to Sirius, drawing her wand.
“Boy, remember your blood status, and be grateful,” Uncle Orion said, pulling his wand out too.
Sirius looked at them defiantly and said nothing.
Narcissa watched in horror as her aunt and uncle began to torture their own son with the Cruciatus Curse. She looked over at Regulus, whose face was frozen and expressionless. At Barty Crouch, leering. At her sister, smiling eerily, so assured in her cause.
The minutes dragged out as Narcissa began to feel nauseous. “Reg, do something,” she whispered.
He looked at her, startled out of his stupor, and whispered back. “I’ll go send an owl. Can you help him get to The Potters?” Narcissa nodded almost imperceptibly.
Eventually, her aunt and uncle must have either felt satisfied they got their message across or remembered they had house guests, and they turned and strode out of the library, ignoring Narcissa and Regulus. They ran up to Sirius, who was pale and sweaty and terrified. Narcissa moved his hair from his face and stared down at him in shock. She wanted to say she was sorry, but she didn’t know what for. Instead, she helped him stumble closer to the fireplace, his face grimacing with each movement. She gathered a handful of green dust and tossed it into the fireplace. “The Potters,” she whispered, hoping it was clear enough. She helped Sirius tumble forward into the fire and heard the woosh of flame refilling the empty space of a boy who had left his home and his family for what Narcissa knew must be the last time.
Narcissa turned and walked quickly back to the party, not wanting her absence to be connected with Sirius’ disappearance. She looked around the room, took a deep breath, and made sure to smile as she wished a Merry Christmas to her family and friends around the room before disappearing upstairs to her bedroom. She knew she ought to be worrying about Sirius, but she was preoccupied with what had transpired in her own world earlier that afternoon. The dizziness, the shadowy figures by the fireplace, and her cousin in that exact position, just hours later. She wanted to tell someone what had happened, and she wished more than anything she was in her own childhood home again, snuggled under the covers with Andromeda and Bellatrix on Andromeda’s king-sized bed, back before her sisters had both flung far out of her orbit. So instead she sat on the guest bed, staring off into space, feeling frightened and alone.
Notes:
couldn't not throw a little simon & garfunkel in there !
Chapter 2: Blacks and Butterflies
Summary:
Narcissa returns to Hogwarts after the holiday
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Chapter Two | Blacks & Butterflies
nights are so starry, blood moonlit
I think there’s been a glitch
January
Auntie Walburga had sent the two remaining Hogwarts-age Black cousins to the train station with a strict warning that if they fraternized with Sirius at all, they would both be transferred to Durmstrang. Then she handed them fare for a magical taxi, insisting they were old enough to take care of things without needing their parents. Narcissa and Reg arrived at Platform 9 ¾, trunks in hand. They looked at each other one last time before parting ways.
Narcissa smiled at him. “Hey, we made it out alive.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Let’s do next Christmas somewhere else next year. Maybe somewhere where parents aren’t insane.”
“Dream big, Reg,” Narcissa said.
“Later, Cissy.”
Narcissa dragged her trunk up the stairs of the scarlet red steam engine, her snowy owl Nocturna hooting softly as they passed by other carriages. She spotted the familiar white dreads and dark brown skin of her best friend Theodore; he was seated, reading a book, in their usual compartment toward the rear of the train.
“Good holiday?” he asked, standing up to give her a hug and lend a hand to swing her luggage up on the rack.
She groaned and collapsed into the seat across from him. “Not really. You?”
“Same here,” he said, and nodded at her. “You want to go first?”
“My sister took the mark.” She tried to sound flippant, but Theo could see worry reflected in her eyes.
“My dad took it too,” he whispered to her. “He showed me. Said it’ll be my turn when I’m 16.”
They stared at each other, feeling grim. “I don’t understand why blood purity warrants a literal war,” she said with a sigh, but they were interrupted as a couple holding hands burst into their train carriage. “Happy New Year!” Narcissa’s housemate Lulu Wilkes trilled, her long dark hair held back in a green velvet headband. She reached down to give Narcissa a hug. Her long-term boyfriend Evan followed behind her, stowing their trunks away as Lulu began chattering about her family holiday in Paris.
“Paris is just so much more romantic than London,” she said. “I was telling Ev he needs to come along with us next year.”
“Not that things didn’t get interesting around here,” Evan commented with a look at Narcissa. Lulu elbowed him, but seemed to relax when he continued, running a hand through his blond hair. “I heard Sirius got kicked out, but Reg didn’t tell me what happened.”
Narcissa glanced at Theo before answering. “Oh, nothing, really. Sirius had wanted to go live with James Potter’s family for a while now. You know what he’s like… always has to cause a scene.” She didn’t know exactly why she didn’t want to tell her friends the truth about her family drama. Maybe because she knew they might, Lulu especially, find the reason for the Cruciatus Curse justifiable. Lulu’s family were some of Voldemort’s biggest supporters, and behind her Prefect badge and put-together appearance, there was a startling violent streak. And how many times had Evan hexed a Hogwarts student just for being muggle-born?
“Pity he’s such a bad egg. I guess there’s one in every family,” Lulu sniffed. “Speaking of, is Dorcas not joining us today?”
No one answered, and Theo deftly changed the subject to their upcoming Quidditch match against Ravenclaw, scheduled to take place in February. Their carriage was less full than usual; Cissy’s and Lulu’s third housemate had begun to spend less and less time with them over the past year or so. Dorcas was quite vocal about being anti-Voldemort, unwilling to quietly tolerate Lulu’s and Evan’s views the way Cissy and Theo were. And that slimy Severus Snape hadn’t joined them since his second year when he’d found that Barty Crouch tolerated his presence more than Evan and Theo ever would.
Narcissa stared out the window, watching the city turn into countryside, snow-covered fields and hills surrounding the train. She tuned out the conversation and focused on breathing through the anxiety that thinking about Sirius brought on, coursing through her veins like electricity, the way it had been since Christmas Eve.
Narcissa found it remarkable how life continued on for everyone else, even if hers felt irrevocably altered. She attended all of her classes, putting in extra hours in the library, reading up on particularly tricky charms and potions. She ate meals with Theo, Evan, and Lulu, sometimes catching Dorcas on her own and eating with her instead. And in her free time, she made little modifications to herself. She dyed her hair blonde because she wanted something to separate her from all of the other Blacks that had previously or currently attended Hogwarts. She charmed her nose to turn up just the tiniest bit. She woke up at dawn each morning to run a lap around the Quidditch Pitch (Professor Flitwick had taught her a charm to evaporate a path through the snow in front of her). She resolved that her family would no longer be the focal point of her life. While the Black cousins were confined to close proximity at 12 Grimmauld Place, they could exist in different orbits at school. Bellatrix wasn’t there to intimidate her. Andromeda couldn’t guilt her over not pushing back against her parents. She wouldn’t let Sirius and his little boy band bother her in the hallway. It was annoying that Regulus was on the Quidditch team with her, but she did her best to avoid too much time with him one-on-one.
Narcissa tried to exhaust herself to the point she could sleep at night, but usually she lay awake late into the night considering the unfortunate possibility that she might be a seer. She wanted no part of that, she was actually on a journey to become as normal as possible, thank you very much. And when she did finally sleep, her dreams were plagued with images of Sirius, terrified, on the ground, or Bella’s leering smile as she showed everyone her mark. She would awake feeling restless and guilty.
The chance to assuage her guilt came to her in the form of Regulus during their second week back at school. He caught her coming back from the library late one evening, and grabbed her by the sleeve of her robes so she couldn’t escape.
“Cissy, wait! Why are you avoiding me?” His long hair was pulled back into a bun, and his eyes were big and earnest.
“I’m not,” she snapped, pulling her sleeve back. “I’m just busy. It’s my OWL year; I’ve got a mountain of studying to do.”
“Okay, okay,” Regulus said appeasingly. “Hey, I just wanted to ask if you’d help me with something.” Although the common room was mostly empty at this hour, he pulled her away from the entrance and toward a window seat. The Slytherin Common Room was underground; during the day, its windows provided a view into the Black Lake, and they would see the occasional mer-person swimming around. At night, it just looked eerie and dark.
“I want to go to Dumbledore,” Reg whispered to her, leaning in.
“Why?” she said loudly, surprised. What good had that doddering old man ever done for anyone?
“Shh,” Reg said. “I just want to make sure Sirius is okay. I want to tell him what happened on Christmas.”
“I’m sure he already knows,” Narcissa pushed back. “Mum says Dumbledore has got the Potters wrapped around his finger. Can’t you just ask Sirius if he’s okay? He’s your brother .”
Reg shot her a dark look. “C’mon, Narcissa. You know Sirius won’t so much as make eye contact with me. I sent him a note the other day, and he sent it back saying if I try to talk to him again, he’ll tell Mum I’m playing Quidditch again and he’ll get me sent to Durmstrang. ”
“Hmm,” Narcissa said, feeling a little bad for Reg. She caught a glimpse of her blonde-haired reflection in the window pane and, for just a moment, she didn’t recognize herself. What did she have to gain by going to Dumbledore? Maybe an eased conscience for not doing more to help Sirius in the moment. What did she have to lose? She could never let Lulu or Evan find out; Theo might understand. But really, she had bigger things on her mind.
Narcissa’s family’s disdain toward Dumbledore’s muggle-loving ways ran deep in her blood. She knew it made her a coward, but she simply couldn’t envision a world in which she went to him for help, especially about a family matter. “I’m sorry, Reg,” she said, “but no.” She left him sitting alone, looking crest-fallen.
Ever disciplined, Narcissa continued waking early every morning to go running. On one particular morning, she woke up at dawn and got dressed in the dark. On either side of her, she could hear the soft breathing of Lulu and Dorcas, still asleep. She slipped out of the dorm and quietly made her way up from the Slytherin common room and out through the doors near the Great Hall. The castle was empty at this hour; even the portraits were gently snoring in their frames. The air was crisp and chilled as she began to jog out toward the Quidditch Pitch. She carried her wand in her right hand, melting a clear path ahead of her, when she heard footsteps crunch in the snow behind her. She whirled around, wand up, a hex on the tip of her tongue.
“Hiya!” a boy said. His hair looked as though it had recently been electrocuted and he had round glasses on his face. “Morning! Beautiful day for a run, eh?” He jogged to where she stood still, not speaking.
“You startled me,” she said, finally, and began to jog again, slightly faster than James Potter. Undeterred, he matched her pace.
“My bad. So, come here often?” The tall, slender boy smiled at her, and she sighed, resigned that she wouldn’t evade him easily.
“It’s peaceful out here in the mornings,” she said, not answering his question. Her hair was in two braids down her back, bouncing as she jogged.
“I like early mornings because nothing bad has happened yet,” James said. “It feels like anything can happen.”
“I can make things how I want them to be, and no one else’s decisions can interfere with it,” she said in a rare moment of earnestness.
“Trouble in paradise?” James asked. He ran like he flew, she noticed, gracefully, effortlessly. “Anything I can help with?”
“No,” Narcissa rolled her eyes. It’s not like she was going to suddenly open up to a Gryffindor, one who was Sirius’ best friend, of all people.
“Are you sure?” James pressed. He paused for a moment, and all she could hear was the tandem crunch of their footsteps on the frozen ground and their panting in the frigid air. He seemed to hesitate for a moment. “From what Sirius told me —”
“Stop!” Narcissa snapped. “I don’t want to hear anything about my cousin or the stupid war right now, okay?”
“Copy,” James replied, frowning just a little. They continued to run in silence around the stadium, post the three goalposts that marked the halfway point of her run.
“So your team is looking pretty good this year,” James said eventually. “You had to replace Flint though, yeah? Who’s your new Chaser?”
“A fourth year, Artemis Moon. Zabini said she’s decent; didn’t even make her try out. I guess we’ll find out next practice.”
“What happened to Flint? I heard he didn’t come back after Christmas.”
Bella had told Narcissa that Xavier Flint was dropping out to join Voldemort now that he had turned 17, strongly hinting that Narcissa consider doing the same when she came of age (or earlier).
“Er…” she hesitated. “I don’t really want to say. But you could probably guess.”
“...Oh,” James replied after a moment. “Got it.”
They approached the end of their run and slowly jogged toward the castle doors, their cheeks red from cold and exertion.
“Well, see you around, Black,” James said, and started to walk in the direction of Gryffindor Tower.
“Wait!” Narcissa called out, and her shout echoed around the empty hall. “Wait,” she whispered.
James paused and raised his eyebrows at her.
She took a deep breath and figured she owed her cousin at least this much. “Regulus wants to know if Sirius is okay.” James’ face darkened.
“No thanks to your family, he’s fine. Well, for the most part. Did you want me to get him to talk to you?”
“No. We just wanted to know. Regulus mostly.” She waited until she turned around to let the relief show on her face.
“Same time tomorrow?” James called out as she descended the stone staircase to the Slytherin dorms. She stuck up a middle finger in response.
Back in her room, Lulu was blow-drying her hair with her wand, and Dorcas was getting dressed. The two had reached a sort of détente; it was simply too inconvenient to hold a grudge against someone with whom you shared a class schedule and a bedroom. Lulu was less blatant about her support of the Dark Lord, and Dorcas was trying to find common ground when possible. Narcissa had been party to that agreement one night sitting on the couches by the common room fireplace, pretending to read her history text on the Goblin-Vampire agreement of 1326. It wasn’t the first argument the pair had had to resolve over the years, but they were no longer the easily-forgettable squabbles over crushes or petty gossip that they used to be.
The girls walked down to breakfast together, chatting about the upcoming Valentine’s Hogsmeade Weekend (“Evan’s got a whole day planned!”) and who Lulu had caught snogging behind a tapestry last night (“your cousin and that mudblood — sorry, Dorcas —muggleborn Mary Macdonald”). Both Dorcas and Narcissa had frowned at this, for different reasons. After a morning of Double Transfiguration with the Ravenclaws, the girls ate lunch with Theo and Evan. Narcissa was enjoying her friends being friends again when Quidditch captain Beatrice Zabini stalked up to them, dark curls spiraling down her back.
“Rosier, Nott, Black, I’ve been looking for you,” Bea said. “First Quidditch practice tonight; I got Slughorn to approve it. I caught Ravenclaw’s starting lineup for February, and I want to make sure we’ve got our new Chaser in sync with the team.” Bea told them this rather than asked them; she operated under the assumption that the world was just an extension of the Quidditch Pitch.
That evening, as Narcissa walked from the changing rooms out to the Quidditch Pitch, she realized she had been running with James Potter in this same spot just ten hours earlier. Now she was surrounded by five other sane Slytherins and one slightly insane one in possession of a whistle. Beatrice blew it twice before giving directions. “Nott, Rosier and I will meet you at the goalposts in a minute. Younger Black, you’re on solo warm up. Older Black, you take the other Chasers to run drills midfield. We’ll meet back here in 20 to scrimmage. Ready, break.” She blew the whistle once more, loudly, and Regulus opened a small wooden box by the stands and released the Golden Snitch, giving it a 60-second head start before shooting after it on his broom. Theo, Evan, and Bea grabbed a spare Quaffle before flying towards the rings. This left Narcissa to grab the other Quaffle and give directions to the new Chaser Artemis and Alfred Avery, who was currently trying to make a weird amount of eye contact with her.
“So, we’ll just start with basic passing, then we’ll do some Quaffle Quadrilaterals.” She watched Artemis take to the sky, her curly hair and emerald green robes streaming behind her. Avery kicked off next, his cropped blond hair cut hidden under his helmet. Narcissa followed behind them; the early evening air was cold but it wasn’t windy out, which made a January practice more bearable. The air felt good on her face, and she closed her eyes for just a moment and breathed in deeply. She closed the distance between her and the other Chasers, and directed them begin flying toward the hoops opposite Theo and the others. They began to toss the red leather ball back and forth; she weaved around them, flying above and below, to see how quickly Artemis would be able to adjust her air and how far she could throw. Narcissa was duly impressed, particularly after Artemis saved a purposefully tough pass from her, catching the ball with the tips of her leather gloves. Artemis grinned widely at Narcissa after this happened, and Narcissa noticed Artemis’ eyes were a pretty shade of green. She realized after a few seconds that she was still staring at Artemis' face, and quickly glanced around to make sure no one had noticed. Overall, Narcissa thought the three of them worked well together, and she was satisfied Bea had found a suitable replacement for Xavier Flint. Their three vs. four scrimmage went smoothly as well, and by the time they landed back on the ground, they were exhausted but in a jubilant mood. Bea even told them “Nice work,” without any insincerity.
As they trudged back toward the changing rooms, Narcissa told Theo and Evan not to wait for her before going to dinner; she wanted to shower quickly before dressing, and she could feel Artemis' eyes on her. She would have been hard-pressed to admit it, but Narcissa was also curious about her new teammate. After she rinsed, she joined Artemis at the lockers, pulling on her uniform skirt and buttoning up her blouse. Artemis was quite chatty, good-naturedly filling in some of Narcissa’s silences with small talk about Quidditch. She had grown up with goalposts in her backyard, and apparently her older siblings played for the Holyhead Harpies.
“I wasn’t sure I wanted to play here,” Artemis said. “I thought I wanted to try something new, since Quidditch has been drilled into my brain basically since I was born, but turns out… I missed it. The Zabinis used to be our neighbors out in Battersea, so when Bea said you lot had a spot available, of course I jumped on it.” She grinned again, and Narcissa, normally quite stoic, found her grin a bit infectious.
“You’re really good,” Narcissa said, honestly, smiling back at her. She slipped on her robes and cloak. “Do you think you’ll go pro then, like your siblings?”
“Nah,” Artemis shook her head, finishing up buttoning her own uniform shirt. “I want to write for the Daily Prophet, actually. What do you want to do?”
Narcissa shrugged. “I wouldn’t mind trying to go pro for a bit. I’m honestly not sure what I want to do. I used to think being an Auror sounded exciting, but now all my parents say is that they’re in Dumbledore’s pocket.”
Artemis smirked and slipped her cloak on. They grabbed their bags and began to walk up toward the castle when a male voice called out her name. Avery jogged over to them from the boys’ locker room and, with a sinking feeling, Narcissa realized he had been waiting for her.
“Hiya,” he called out, now walking next to them. “Good practice, yeah?”
“Mhmm,” Naricssa said politely with a tight-lipped smile, and Artemis looked curiously between the two of them.
“So, Narcissa,” Avery continued, his cornflower blue eyes trained on her. “It’s been really fun practicing together; I think we make a good pair of Chasers.”
Narcissa thought she knew where this was going; every year around the Valentine’s Day Hogsmeade date, boys began to act a little strangely. So far, none of them had been successful.
“Do you want me to hang back?” Artemis muttered under her breath to Narcissa.
“No,” Narcissa whispered urgently, eyes wide.
“And I have learned so much about Quidditch from you,” Avery was still going, oblivious to her discomfort. “So I wanted to ask… would you do me the honor of going to Hogsmeade with me this Valentine's Day?”
Narcissa wanted to combust in embarrassment over this happening in front of her new, rather impressive teammate.
“Oh, that’s so nice,” she said back, awkwardly. She didn’t usually have a hard time saying no, but she felt somewhat responsible for not messing up her team dynamics. “I just… I can’t.”
“Oh… Don’t worry about it. Maybe another time?” he said hopefully, running his hand through his hair. “Or are you seeing someone else?”
“Er…” She tried to work up the courage to tell him she wasn’t interested, but Avery was a bit of a wildcard, and Bea would be so pissed if Quidditch was impacted. Narcissa looked at Artemis in desperation, and Artemis, apparently feeling this painful conversation had gone on long enough, piped up.
“Yep.” She grabbed Narcissa by the hand. “She’s going with me.” And before Narcissa had even processed those words, Artemis pulled Narcissa close and kissed her cheek.
Avery gaped at them, and Narcissa, mortified but not mad, tried not to appear too startled. Artemis smiled sweetly. “Sorry,” she said to Avery, who weakly said, “No problem,” and walked on toward the castle, embarrassed. Several concerning thoughts ran through Narcissa’s mind at once: a girl she barely knew had kissed her cheek and she wasn’t upset about it, Avery was surely about to tell his friends about it, and (she immediately hated herself for thinking it) she wondered if Artemis was a pureblood.
“Sorry if I overstepped,” Artemis said, now that Avery was out of earshot.
“It’s fine,” Narcissa replied, not really listening. She was busy wondering why the flowery scent of Artemis’ perfume was making her stomach feel all sorts of fluttery.
Notes:
in my headcanon, theo's character (eventually mr. theodore nott sr.) looks like ekko from arcane.
song: glitch by TS
Chapter 3: Seers and Snowy Owls
Summary:
Narcissa tries to get to the bottom of this seer business, but she finds herself distracted by her surroundings.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Chapter Three | Seers and Snowy Owls
And you don't really read into
My melancholia
February
It took a letter from her mother and another week of gathering up courage for Narcissa to borrow a library book on Seers. She had been working hard at trying to convince herself she simply had an overactive imagination when a great eagle owl dropped a package from Mum into her lap.
Dearest Narcissa,
I hope this letter finds you well. I am writing with some news. My Auntie Belinda passed away in a sailing accident in Nice earlier this week, and she passed this locket onto you in her will. It is rumored to be an heirloom directly from Salazar Slytherin, but you know your aunt told all kinds of tall tales, and she probably just bought it on sale from Borgin and Burkes.
I trust you are taking your studies seriously as well as finding a pureblood gentleman to take you on a date. It was on a Hogsmeade Valentine’s Day trip when your father and I went on our first date at Cauldron Cakes.
All my love,
Mum
After scanning the letter, Narcissa unwrapped the tissue-papered bundle. Inside was a heart-shaped golden locket with a serpentine S engraved into its surface. It was heavier than she expected but quite pretty.
“Secret admirer?” Theo asked, watching her examine it at the breakfast table.
She smiled. “Just my mum’s auntie,” she said. “I kind of forgot about her. My mum always called her ‘Aunt Batty’...” She trailed off, a sinking feeling in her stomach as a memory from an early childhood holiday in France floated to the front of her mind. A sunny beach in Nice, and Cissy, Andromeda, and Bella running along the rocky shoreline into the water, splashing and laughing until they heard a blood-curdling scream from shore. Aunt Batty had needed a calming draught; she was unable to stop shrieking about something ominous in the water. Cissy remembered her dad complaining about having to modify the memory of the muggle beach club owner after.
“So, Aunt Batty was a little crazy?” Theo asked, spooning eggs onto his plate.
“You could say that,” Narcissa said, memories connecting in her mind. “Hey, I forgot I have a library book due. I’m just going run and drop it off now before class starts.” She stuffed the letter and necklace into her bag as she stood up.
“I’ll save you a seat in Binns’ class,” Theo said, waving at her. She shoved a piece of toast into her mouth and rushed off toward the library.
Being so early in the morning, the stately Hogwarts library was empty with the exception of some seventh year Ravenclaws who’d pulled an all-nighter preparing for NEWTS. She discreetly walked around the outer stacks of shelves to avoid the main study area, scanning the subject titles as she browsed. She probably wouldn’t find anything in “magical history,” nor in “modern languages” or “muggle psychology.” She paused for a moment under “natural sciences” and reflected that being a seer was anything but natural. Eventually, she came across the “supernatural sciences” section, which had books about everything from shapeshifting to resurrection of the dead. She grabbed a couple of promising books “Seeing, Through the Ages,” “Caring for Clairvoyance,” and “Visions and Visionaries.” She stuffed them deep into her bag and hurried around a corner to her favorite reading nook. The window view overlooked the Whomping Willow, and the snow-covered trees of the Forbidden Forest lurked in the distance.
She opened up “Seeing, Through the Ages” and skimmed the first chapter about the Greek prophet Tiresias, who had been struck blind, and the famed princess Cassandra, who was cursed and never to be believed. She found this a bit depressing, so she picked up “Caring for Clairvoyance” instead, flipping through the pages until she found a chapter that looked relevant.
Those gifted with clairvoyance can experience this gift in a myriad of ways. Those with retrocognition see events of the past, and those with precognition see events of the future. They may be visionaries who experience realistic visions while awake, or they may be dreamers whose insight appears to them while they slumber. There are many names for this gift, but whether it be prophet or seer, diviner or oracle, the fact remains the same: it’s a rare ability passed down through generations in few wizarding families.
So if I’m a seer, she thought, leaning her head back against the window. I can…
- Tell no one
- Tell one of my friends and swear them to secrecy
- Tell someone in my family
Option one would maintain the status quo, but that was least likely to help lower her nighttime anxiety. Option two seemed the most dangerous; the last thing she wanted was for anyone in the castle to find out. The War on Mudbloods didn’t stop at muggleborns; it expanded to any variation of wizard deviating from the norm. Option three was possible. Bellatrix was out of the question; she’d surely tell their mum and Narcissa would be known as Batty 2.0. Andromeda was a safer bet, although she felt guilty for not reaching out to her since before Christmas.
A loud bell echoed through the library, signaling five minutes until the first class began. Narcissa shoved the books deep into her bag and rushed out of the library to History of Magic, ducking behind the unicorn tapestry on the second floor for a shortcut and sliding into a seat Theo had saved for her in the back of the classroom. He was ready for lecture, parchment dated and quill ready to take notes.
As she got seated, Professor Binns launched into a lecture on the magical inventions that aided seafaring in the mid-1400s, which might have been slightly interesting with another professor but with Binns sounded so dull she thought she’d rather watch grass grow. She pulled out her materials as well, although instead of recording notes on the improved astrolabe, she began writing to her sister.
Andromeda,
Greetings from ye olde History of Magic. Professor Binns is droning on as usual. Wish you were here?
I hope you and Ted have cute Valentine’s Day plans. Mum wrote me a letter basically telling me to find a boyfriend by then. *eye roll*
I know we haven’t been talking much, but something strange happened to me over Christmas, and I don’t know who else to tell.
Narcissa relayed the events of Christmas Eve and included what she had just learned from the book.
I know you’re secretly in contact with Mum behind Dad’s back, but I’m trusting you not to tell her. I don’t want her to think I’m like Aunt Batty. Any advice is welcome.
Give Dori a smooch from me.
Love,
Cissy
She tapped her wand to seal the parchment shut just as Binns wrapped up his lecture. “Ten inches on the contributions Heparcterus the Helpful made to medieval seafaring due next class,” he said from behind his podium. Crap. She’d have to get the notes from Theo at lunch.
The Slytherins practiced reductor curses in Defense Against the Dark Arts and learned how to transform a ladybug into a biscuit tin in Transfiguration. Lulu’s tin was bright red and glossy, whereas Narcissa’s was sleek and black. Theo’s tin sprouted wings and crashed into a window. He looked at Narcissa and shrugged. “Other stuff on my mind,” he said.
The Slytherins made their way down to the Great Hall for a late lunch, listening to Evan complain about inner thigh chafing from Bea’s most recent Quidditch drilling. Narcissa had dreaded the practice that followed Avery’s proposed date, although less because of him and more because Artemis. Narcissa had never had a real boyfriend; she and Theo had kissed once in their third year, but she’d never had any real interest in making time for a relationship. Lulu and Evan had gotten together back in their second year, in the innocent non-existence-to-full-commitment way that happens when you’re 12. Narcissa had always assumed the same would happen to her; one day she’d meet someone she liked enough that they’d just snap together like magnets, no question about it, and why bother worrying about it in the meantime? But Artemis had thrown off Narcissa’s monastic way of life. Narcissa found herself getting distracted admiring Artemis’ long chestnut brown hair or pretty green eyes; she had nearly taken a Quaffle to the face earlier in the week because of this. And at practice last night, Artemis had simply smiled at her and Narcissa immediately fumbled a pass.
She hoped Artemis had no idea what strange thoughts were running inside her head. Things did seem normal between them; however, the problem with not knowing Artemis very well, Narcissa thought, was that she didn't know what “normal” really was.
She shook herself out of thoughts of Artemis, slightly alarmed at herself, and nudged Theo. “Can I grab the History notes?” she asked him, once they were sitting down.
He looked guiltily down at his plate. “What happened to yours?”
“I didn’t take any,” she said. “Sorry. I needed to write a letter to my sister.” She was puzzled; normally, they shared notes amongst them without issue.
“Bella?” Theo asked, surprised.
“No, Andromeda.” She waited a moment. “So, no notes?”
“I was writing a letter too,” he said quietly.
“Oh! Who were you writing to?”
“Is it okay if I don’t tell you?” he asked, looking up at her now and tugging on his hair.
“Yeah, no problem,” Narcissa replied, but she looked at him sideways. She clearly wasn’t the only Slytherin keeping secrets around the castle. “I’ll get them from someone else.”
After lunch ended, Evan and Lulu departed the Great Hall for a meeting with the Slytherin Head Boy; he was handing out their new prefect rotas, and Theo and Narcissa headed up to the owlery to mail their letters.
The putrid smell of owl droppings distracted Narcissa from immediately noticing someone else was there in the tower, and she jumped as a coy voice greeted them. “Hi, Narcissa. Nott.” Artemis Moon waved at them from over by one of the open windows before turning back to her owl.
“Hiya, Artemis,” Theo said, and Narcissa willed her suddenly rapid heartbeat to slow down. Theo went to find one of the school barn owls, and Narcissa scanned the circular tower for Nocturna, sighting her near Artemis.
Artemis finished tying her letter to a black-feathered owl and sent it flying off into the chilly winter sky before turning toward Narcissa. Artemis leaned casually against the stone wall, watching as Nocturna flew down from the rafters and landed in front of Narcissa with a soft hoot and a flutter of feathers.
“Beautiful owl,” Artemis said. Narcissa smiled at her as she petted Nocturna’s soft, white feathers.
“Thanks. I’m just sending a letter to my older sister.” Narcissa fumbled a little, taking three tries to tie her letter onto Nocturna’s leg.
“I was placing an order for new Quidditch gloves. I was hoping to have them in time for the match this weekend, but I put it off too long. They should arrive in time for me to pick them up next Hogsmeade weekend, though. Speaking of, are you going?”
“Oh, I’m not sure,” Narcissa sighed, giving Nocturna an owl treat and whispering “ Andromeda ” before sending her off. “Probably. Are you?”
“Yeah, like I said. At least to pick up my gloves.”
Narcissa felt flustered. “Right, sorry.”
“You seem a bit distracted,” Artemis said, peering closely at her. “Everything okay?”
“Of course!” Narcissa said, not at all in her usual calm voice. She grasped for something normal to say. “Anyway, are you feeling ready for Saturday?”
Artemis gave a little shake of her head, flipping her long brown waves over one shoulder. “I think so. You’ve been amazing at helping me practice.” She smiled up at Narcissa, who reflected that this wasn’t strictly true.
“I mean, you’re the one that taught us all the Holyhead Handle,” Narcissa smiled back.
Someone loudly cleared their throat, and both girls immediately straightened up and turned to look at Theo.
“Anyway, see you around, Black,” Artemis said coolly, and gave a little wave to Theo before descending the spiral staircase, out of sight.
“What was that all about?” Theo asked, elbowing Narcissa as soon as they heard the door close below them.
“What?” Narcissa replied defensively.
“ ‘ You’re so amazing.’ ‘No, you’re so amazing,’ ” Theo teased.
Narcissa groaned. “Nothing.”
“Didn’t seem like it,” Theo smirked.
“You know I don’t date,” Narcissa said, beginning to head toward the stairs. “Especially girls.”
“Hey, I'm not one to judge.”
Narcissa rolled her eyes back at him and continued down the stairs. “Come on. Let’s go see if we can get someone’s history notes.”
Notes:
I chose with Dori as Tonks' nickname instead of Dora because one time I knew this middle school kid named Dori and she was super awesome whereas Dora reminds me of The Explorer soooo. That's that on that.
Song: Lavender Haze - TS
Chapter 4: Quidditch & Almost-Kisses
Summary:
quidditch!
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
you should think about the consequence
of your magnetic field being a little too strong
The Slytherin vs. Ravenclaw Match of February 1976 was one of the more stressful games of Narcissa’s Quidditch career. Although the conditions were perfect — slight cloud-cover to keep the sun out of their eyes, no chance of rain or snow — the teams were evenly matched enough that everyone was on edge.
All of Hogwarts seemed to be in the stands, cheering wildly as Madam Hooch demanded the captains, one in emerald green robes, the other in sky blue, shake hands. Hooch released the golden snitch, which ascended in a flurry of motion, and then she blew the whistle, long and loud. Fourteen brooms kicked off into the air at once, and Narcissa felt a rush of adrenaline as she watched her team launch into their oft-practiced formation. Theo hovered in front of the middle goal-post, waiting for his opponents; Bea and Evan separated, flying down opposite sides of the field, each with their bat ready to defend their team against bludgers; Regulus was hovering above everyone else, scanning the sky for the golden snitch; and Narcissa, Artemis, and Avery accelerated down the field, passing the red Quaffle between the three of them as easily as breathing.
The match commentator, a Hufflepuff sixth year, narrated the play-by-play: “Narcissa Black has the Quaffle, she passes it to Slytherin’s new Chaser Artemis Moon, younger sister of the famous Holyhead Harpies twins Achilles Moon and Athena Moon. You can tell that Quidditch runs in her blood; look at that girl fly! Moon passes it to Avery, who passes it back to Moon, and — holy — Slytherin ten - Ravenclaw nil within the first sixty seconds of the game.”
The Ravenclaw team seemed incensed by this, their Chasers streaking back down the field before the Slytherin team had gathered themselves. Bea flew out to meet them, whacking bludger after bludger at their Chasers; Ronald Davies even had to perform a Sloth Grip Roll to avoid being hit, his robes a blue blur in the distance. Narcissa cursed at herself for not being ready; Davies’ Quaffle rushed just past the outstretched tips of Theo’s fingers as Ravenclaw evened the score. The “boos” of the Slytherins were outweighed by the cheers of the other three quarters of the stadium, who were brandishing light blue flags and scarves in celebration.
The Slytherin Chasers split to cover each Ravenclaw Chaser this time. Artemis had the Quaffle again, and Narcissa turned her broom abruptly to catch the ball, nearly smacking Davies in the face with the tail of her broom. Neither team’s chasers were able to outrun the other based on speed alone; they relied on quick directional changes and Holyhead Handles to move the ball down the field toward the Ravenclaw goalposts.
“Black, look out!” Bea screamed at her, and Narcissa swerved right as she heard a bludger from the Ravenclaw beater rush past her ear. Heart pounding, she passed the ball to Avery, who passed it to Artemis, who passed it to her, and — woosh — she scored, face flushed, heart beating fast, cheers from the Slytherin section of the Quidditch pitch (and groans from the others) faint in the periphery of her focus.
The game continued in this manner for the next half hour, neither team able to get more than ten points ahead at a time. Narcissa barely took her eyes off the Quaffle, only looking around when she heard a crunch and Avery began a steady stream of cursing. Kevin Patil had hit a bludger straight into Avery’s kneecap. “Slytherin chaser down!” the commentator shouted into the magical megaphone. Artemis and Narcissa exchanged determined glances.
“Regulus, we need to end this!” Bea shouted in the distance.
“That’s Slytherin in possession. No, Ravenclaw. Er – Davies dropped the Quaffle – and Moon’s swept in and grabbed it. She’s passing it to Black — oh wait! Look at them go! Is that… Do they see the snitch? That’s the Slytherin seeker Black and Ravenclaw seeker Daisy Brown racing for the golden snitch. Where is it? WHERE IS IT?” The commentator was beside himself in excitement. “Brown is pulling slightly ahead. That’ll be tough. What is Black doing? Has he confused Quidditch with… muggle surfing?”
Narcissa chanced a glance behind her even as she sped toward the Ravenclaw goalposts, seeing Regulus and Daisy Brown both speeding straight at the ground where the snitch was shimmering in a patch of sunlight just by the stands. Reggie was leaning forward, now crouching on his broom. What the hell was he doing? Was he… no… At the same time as Reggie, in an incredible feat of balance, stood up on his broom and launched himself forward at the golden snitch, Narcissa felt an excruciating strike in her side, knocking the wind out of her. Patil had taken advantage of her momentary distraction and slammed a bludger at her. She dropped the Quaffle in surprise, tumbling off of her broom just as Madam Hooch blew her whistle, signalling a winner.
“Narcissa!” Artemis yelled, and within moments she was there pulling Narcissa back onto her own broom. Meanwhile, the rest of the Slytherins were erupting in celebration, flooding the field, all focused on Regulus holding the snitch up in his hand.
“I’m fine,” Narcissa said, but it hurt to breathe, and she was grateful Artemis flew slowly beside her as they descended back to the ground, where Bea pulled the team into a brief, adrenaline-filled hug. “Nice one, Reg,” Narcissa said to her cousin, who looked at her and shrugged, although she could tell he was trying to hide a smile.
Narcissa eventually made her way back to Slytherin Common Room, although she went by way of the Hospital Wing so Madam Pomfrey could patch her up. “Just a bad bruise, dear, luckily nothing’s broken,” the sweet nurse said, giving her a potion for the pain.
When Narcissa arrived, the celebration party was in full swing. A congratulatory banner had been hung up with charmed sketches of green serpents curling up and around the letters that read “Go Slytherin Go!” Bea was several firewhiskeys deep and in an unusually sentimental mood, waxing poetic about the match to a slightly uncomfortable-looking Theo and giggling Dorcas. Lulu was dressed in a long-sleeve lace top and a short red skirt perfect for twirling, Evan was spinning her around the room to Frankie Valli, and Avery was sitting down in a corner with other Seventh Years, Madam Pomfrey having reset his kneecap after the match as well.
Narcissa snuck upstairs to swap out her Quidditch robes for a festive emerald green tank top and bell bottom jeans. It was rare she got the chance to dress in something other than wizarding robes or her uniform, which were comfortable but rather unflattering. She left her hair in its two windswept braids and quickly swiped dark red lipstick across her lips. She rifled through her nightstand and pulled out of the drawer the gold, heart-shaped locket Aunt Batty had left for her, clasping it around her neck. Just as she had shut her bedroom door and was making her way down the spiral staircase, she saw Artemis was on her way up, holding two drinks. She felt an electric thrill in the pit of her stomach.
“Thought you might want this,” Artemis said, holding one cup of what looked like Witches Brew out to Narcissa. Narcissa noticed Artemis had changed too, wearing a knit black dress and dark eyeliner that made her green eyes shimmer. Her hair hung in loose waves. “How are you feeling?”
“Better,” Narcissa said, reaching out to take the cup once Artemis had reached her. “Thanks for this.” Her fingers grazed Artemis’ hand as she took the cup, her heart pounding at their proximity.
“You look nice,” Artemis said, smiling right at her.
“You do, too,” Narcissa replied, shyly. “C’mon, let’s go downstairs.” She bounded down the rest of the steep, wooden stairs, leading Artemis over to the dance floor. She and Artemis stayed side by side throughout the night, listening to Bea’s repeated and surprisingly emotional declarations of pride for her team, spinning around on the dance floor beside Evan and Lulu, even having a rare moment of camaraderie with Regulus, although they only spoke about the match, ignoring the topic of Sirius completely.
“Hey, Narcissa. Can I have this dance?” It was Avery, looking hopeful as he gestured toward the record player.
Wishin' and hopin' and thinkin' and prayin'
Plannin' and dreamin' each night of his charms
That won't get you into his arms
“Sorry, Avery,” she said, not sounding all that sorry. “I’m busy.” She looked at Artemis, who giggled back at her. They were on their third cup of Witches Brew, and Narcissa felt content and comfortable in her own skin.
“ Really ?” Avery asked. Artemis smiled widely at him, and he backed away, looking skeptically at the pair of them.
“Persistent, that one,” Artemis said.
“Mhmm,” Narcissa agreed. She briefly leaned her head against Artemis’ and closed her eyes. “Although I’m surprised he didn’t spread rumors about us going to Hogsmeade together.”
“Oh, I took care of that,” Artemis said, shrugging. “Told him I’d slip veritaserum in his tea and get him spilling all of his deepest, darkest secrets one night when he was least expecting it. I think he’s still a little scared of me, to be honest.” Narcissa laughed. A feeling both dreadful and exciting was stirring in her, something that she was realizing with dread that she had buried deep down for a long time, something she was feeling fully for the first time in her fifteen years: she wanted to snog someone. Not just a peck on the cheek, a full-on snog. With a girl. For several minutes. In front of everyone.
Artemis shook her out of her daydream, pulling her toward the music as drums from the next song blasted from the magically amplified record player.
When I met you in the restaurant
You could tell I was no debutante
You asked me what’s my pleasure
A movie or a measure
I’ll have a cup of tea
And tell you of my dreaming
The girls spun each other around across the dance floor to the dreamy music, not breaking eye contact, and as they reached the other side of the common room, Artemis pulled Narcissa toward the staircase to her dorm. Narcissa followed her up the stairs and into the bathroom, closing the door behind them.
Artemis pushed Narcissa against the sink, her hands on Narcissa’s waist. Narcissa was nervous — holding hands in public was one thing; everyone thought they were just two girl friends dancing and having fun. Holding hands in private was another; suddenly, this had an entirely different connotation, conveyed a different intention altogether. She couldn’t take the pressure, couldn’t stop imagining what her father or Bella or Lulu would say if they saw her, couldn’t stop thinking that she might be reading Artemis wrong, that this was her mind’s way of attempting to distract her from everything else going on in her life, or worse, that Artemis might tell everyone Narcissa was a freak and she’d be disowned from the Black family too. Mind spiraling, she took one look at Artemis’ face and bolted back out the door, slamming it shut behind her.
Notes:
~gorgeous - TS
~wishin' and hopin' - dusty springfield version
~dreaming - blondie <3
Chapter 5: Dorcas & Dark Marks
Summary:
Lulu speaks her mind!
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Chapter Five | Dorcas & Dark Marks
I think I’ve seen this film before
and I didn't like the ending
you’re not my homeland anymore
so what am I defending
Narcissa woke up on Sunday morning with a pounding headache and a nauseous stomach. She lay in bed, curtains closed around her, with a distinct feeling something was off… was it the match? No, they had won. Was it something to do with Regulus? No, she didn’t think so. Did something happen at the party? Oh, fuck. The blurry events of last night made a crash-landing in her mind. She pulled her blankets over her face and cringed hard. Had she really slammed the door on Artemis? Hopefully it was worse in memory than in reality. She wondered how long she could hide in her room before anyone noticed she was absent from all activities, but a soft, sweet voice called her name.
“Cissy, are you awake?” It was Lulu.
“No,” Narcissa groaned, not moving.
Lulu pulled open the curtains of Narcissa’s four-poster and peeked her head in. Despite drinking her own fair share of Witches Brew last night, Lulu seemed hangover free, her straight dark hair not mussed up in the slightest, her brown eyes not bloodshot in the least.
“Let’s go down to breakfast, sleepyhead. Some toast will do you good.” Lulu disappeared back out of the curtains and padded over to wake up Dorcas, then walked back to her dresser. She picked up a clear bottle with light pink liquid inside and held it out toward Narcissa. “I have some Pepperup Potion from my sister! Take a swig.” Lulu’s cousin worked at St. Mungo’s and had no qualms about the Lulu repurposing medicine as a hangover cure.
Narcissa reached over and took the bottle, drinking deeply, the healing properties immediately easing her headache and nausea. She passed it over to Dorcas, who was stumbling past her on her way to the bathroom. “You’re an angel,” she managed, taking small sips.
After slipping on their robes, the girls, feeling much perkier now, headed up to the Great Hall for a proper breakfast. Narcissa avoided looking directly at the Slytherin table as she entered. Once seated, she remained on edge, sipping her tea, scanning the table out of the corner of her eye to see if Artemis was anywhere in sight. Nowhere to be seen. She let herself relax a little, listening to Lulu and Dorcas talk about something Selwyn and Travers had done last night.
“So Father says something interesting is happening next year at Hogwarts,” Lulu said, delicately placing berries on top of her toast, “but he won’t tell me what it is.” Lulu’s father was high up in the International Magical Cooperation of the Ministry of Magic.
“Maybe Hogwarts is finally getting a sports team that’s not Quidditch,” Dorcas said hopefully.
“I took a look through his correspondence last time I was home,” Lulu said. “He was writing back and forth with someone in Norway, if that gives you any ideas.”
“Ski team!” Dorcas exclaimed, and reached over the table to grab a slice of toast.
“Isn’t that where Durmstrang is?” Narcissa asked, sipping her steaming mug of coffee. “Foreign exchange program?”
“I’d go,” Lulu said, tugging at the long sleeves on her sweater. “I’d love to see a polar bear.”
Their conversation was interrupted by the morning post owls swooping down into the Great Hall, dropping packages and scrolls amongst the four house tables, stopping for a nibble of bacon or a pat from their owner before departing for the owlery. It had been over a week with nothing from Andromeda, Narcissa noticed with a sinking feeling, but a school barn owl did drop a letter for Theo at an empty place setting nearby. “I’ll grab it for him,” Lulu said. “He and Evan are probably still passed out; boys are such babies when it comes to hangovers. Anyway, I was thinking today I would try to do some practical research on curses. Slughorn wrote me a pass for the Restricted Section. If anyone wants to join me, that’s where I’ll be.”
Dorcas and Narcissa exchanged glances. “Maybe I’ll see you later,” Narcissa said. “You know drinking makes me anxious. I think I’m going to go for a run, see if I can clear my head a little.”
“And I have plans already. With my, uh, Gobstones group,” Dorcas said.
“Exercising and a Gobstones group?” Lulu smirked. “Alright, weirdos, have fun.”
Half an hour later, Narcissa was out on the Quidditch pitch, the warmth of the sun on her face indeed helping her feel a little bit calmer. The feeling didn’t last long, however; she heard footsteps behind her grow closer and closer. “God damnit,” she said audibly. She didn’t have to turn around to know a certain glasses-wearing Gryffindor was jogging along behind her.
“Beautiful morning!” James said, catching up, appearing to barely be breaking a sweat.
“It was until you got here, Potter,” Narcissa said wearily, tossing her long silvery-blonde braid back over her shoulder.
“Free castle,” James replied cheekily. “You look remarkably mobile for someone who took a bludger to the ribs yesterday.”
“And yet Slytherin gets a rep for playing dirty,” Narcissa said, raising her eyebrows.
“Fair enough.” James’ face glistened in the winter sun. “Although, I’m pretty sure it was your chaser who tried to hex Sirius the morning of our match last fall. I’m not sure his toenails will ever be the same.”
“Ah. It’s also possible my dear cousin is just a troll changeling like Bella always thought. We’ll never know for sure.”
James snorted. “Speaking of, Sirius asked me to pass along a message.”
Narcissa continued to look straight ahead as they ran. “Well?” she asked suspiciously.
“He says to meet him at The Cauldron at noon next Hogsmeade weekend.”
She looked straight at him now, slowing down to a jog.
“Might be something family related?” he suggested. “Not sure, I’m just the messenger.” Narcissa doubted this was true. She knew Sirius and James had functioned like two parts of one whole since they’d met on the Hogwarts Express all those years ago. Unfortunately.
“I’m not particularly interested in anything to do with the Blacks at the moment,” she said, face turned forward once more.
“Neither is Sirius.”
“Not the same,” she snapped. “He is openly rejecting our values and embarrassing our family.” She was quoting her father here. “I’m simply not getting involved. I’m not choosing sides. I’m just Narcissa. No association.”
“I’m not sure this is the kind of situation where you can’t choose a side,” James said quietly. “Not choosing is still a choice.” He hesitated. “I won’t interrupt your morning anymore. But I hope you see Sirius. It seems to me that you both have more in common than you might think.”
Narcissa scowled at him as he picked up his pace, leaving her behind with her own thoughts and the irritating feeling that James Potter might possibly be right.
The week leading up to Valentine's Day in Hogsmeade was mostly uneventful. Narcissa’s first encounter with Artemis post near-kiss was at dinner Saturday night, when Artemis gave her a brief wave and turned back to the other end of the table, where she appeared to be holding court among the other Fourth Years. This left Narcissa with a small but constant knot of anxiety in her stomach, wondering if Artemis had given up on her as a misinterpreted situation, or maybe everything had been all in her head. She received top marks again on Amortentia, although she was alarmed to realize she smelled the fresh air of the Quidditch pitch, and, oh, fuck, that was definitely Artemis’ flowery perfume. She stayed up late in the Astronomy Tower, charting the movements of the planets as she had done monthly since third year, for her research project. Mars was growing brighter, more visible to the naked eye than in recent years. And Dorcas and Lulu had another argument; it was this that ultimately made up Narcissa’s mind about going to see Sirius in Hogsmeade.
It was Friday night, and the Fifth Year Slytherins were lounging in front of their common room fireplace, crowded close for warmth. Torches flamed on nearby walls. Evan and Theo were playing Wizarding Chess, evenly matched. Narcissa sat scribbling along the bottom of a piece of parchment, finishing up final touches on the impact of the essence of pearl on the width of the spirals in a love potion. Dorcas was reading an American muggle book, sniffling and mumbling something about “staying gold,” and Lulu was painting her nails a lurid pink when Severus Snape and Barty Crouch skulked in, both looking annoyed, complaining about their Professors’ discrimination against Slytherins.
“We got a double detention from McGonagall,” Snape said, disgusted. “She barely batted an eye at the Gryffindors.’”
“Maybe the Gryffindors wash their hair more frequently,” Evan said, and moved his rook forward.
“Shut it, Rosier,” Crouch said, then looked over at Narcissa. “Your cousin and that mudblood got away with just losing House Points,” Crouch complained. “And he got Snape with a stinging jinx.”
“Don’t say that,” Dorcas said at the same time as Narcissa muttered, “Not my problem.”
“Oh, you have a problem with ‘mudblood,’ Meadowes?” Crouch said, leering and talking in a baby voice. “You becoming a bit of a blood traitor these days?”
“It’s not being a ‘blood traitor’ to treat everyone with human decency.” Narcissa could hear the eye roll in Dorcas’ voice.
“Not everyone deserves ‘human decency,’ is the problem,” Crouch said. Snape looked shiftily at his feet but didn’t speak up. Narcissa remembered he was a halfblood, the only Slytherin in their year.
“Fuck off, Crouch,” Dorcas said loudly.
“As you wish,” Crouch said, and curtsied before he walked a way, Snape trailing behind him.
“And thanks for having my back there,” Dorcas snapped at the group, everyone freezing at her tone of voice.
“Why would we? Crouch isn’t wrong. The way you’re speaking can get you in trouble,” Lulu said, nonchalantly blowing on her fingernails. “My father says at the Ministry, the Dark Lord has gained enough supporters that they’re able to target the Oppressors, anyone associated with Dumbledore. In the mind of the Ministry these days, a blood traitor is just as bad as a muggle-born.”
“This is Hogwarts, not the Ministry, Lu. Calm down,” Theo said.
“You think what goes on here isn’t connected to what goes on out there?” Lulu said scathingly. “Snape is annoying but he’s right. Professors are quick to blame Slytherin students and believe anyone but. They teach practical defensive magic to the other Houses but just theory for us. It’s like they’re afraid of our power. You of all people should know that.” She turned from Theo to Narcissa. “And you. Your families are two of the Dark Lord’s biggest supporters. You know, Bella was the first to ever take the Dark Mark?”
Narcissa’s heart sank to her stomach. Her sister? “How do you know that?”
“Because Evan and I had dinner with her over the holidays. The night we arrived home from school, before I left for France.”
“Mate, you did what?” Theo asked, sitting up, abandoning the chess board. Evan looked over at Lulu.
“She asked us not to tell you,” Lulu answered evenly.
“Sorry, mate,” Evan said.
Narcissa tried to wrap her head around her older sister being in communication with Lulu and not her.
“I guess she got the idea that you and Regulus weren’t ready to take the Mark yet, not committed enough against the Oppressors. Evan and I, on the other hand…”
“You’re taking the Mark?” Narcissa asked incredulously. “What, is that your idea of a cute Valentine’s Day date, getting matching tattoos, signing your life over to a politician obsessed with death ?”
“Lulu, don’t do it,” Dorcas spoke up, anger turned to panic. “Promise us you won’t go through with it. Think it over."
“It’s already done,” Lulu said, and rolled her sleeve up. Narcissa looked at the Dark Mark, snake shimmering, crawling out of a jeering skull, and felt sick. Dorcas shot out of her chair and bolted up the stairs, looking disgusted. For a moment, the only sound anyone could hear was the crackle of logs in the fireplace.
“Did Bella pressure you into doing this?” Narcissa asked after a minute.
“This is why we didn’t want to tell you,” Lulu said. “You’re both acting like half of your families don’t already have the Mark.” She looked at Evan.
“But why not wait until you’re done at Hogwarts?” Theo asked.
“A handful of N.E.W.Ts means nothing to the Dark Lord,” Evan replied.
“You’re literally both prefects,” Narcissa snorted. “Lu, you’ve never scored lower than an E on any homework. You’re telling me you’ll be Hogwarts drop outs?”
Lulu shrugged. “We might be of better service elsewhere next year.”
“But we’re still teenagers!” Narcissa said, exasperated now. “Why do you have to fight a grown person’s war?
“You’re not listening, Cissy,” Lulu said. “The war is going to happen whether or not you deny it. Be careful how you speak, or someone might grow suspicious you’re more like Dorcas, or your imbecile cousin Sirius, than we thought.”
Narcissa didn’t break eye contact as she stood up to become face-to-face with Lulu and said, coldly, “I’m not.” Then she stalked toward the stairs, summoning her quill, parchment, and Potions textbook before entering her dorm. The lights were out and Dorcas’ curtains were shut, but the room was noticeably absent of Dorcas’ usual light snoring.
Narcissa changed into her nightgown, alternately fuming at Lulu and Evan for taking the Mark and concealing it, and mourning the friendship the three Slytherins girls had had since First Year in the train carriage when Lulu had confidently declared they’d all be best friends forever. It seemed unlikely this was something Dorcas and Lulu could come back from, their differences too irreconcilable. And deep down, although Narcissa would never admit it, she was oddly jealous Bella was writing to Lulu instead of her.
Notes:
song: exile by TS
Chapter Text
Chapter Six | Sirius & Snogs
this cage was once just fine
am I allowed to cry?
Hogsmeade Valentine’s Day was rainy and bleak. Narcissa didn’t mind though; everyone was hidden under their umbrellas, squinting through the rain. No one would notice she was alone on Valentine’s Day, and no one would spot her sneaking around to visit Sirius.
Lulu and Evan departed for the village just after breakfast, citing a busy day but promising to meet up with Narcissa for a drink in the Three Broomsticks around two. Theo was… well, she wasn’t sure exactly what Theo was doing or who he was going with, but she suspected it had something to do with his secret letter from the other day. She might have pried more had she not been so preoccupied. Dorcas hadn’t spoken to any of them since the argument. In fact, she was pretty sure Dorcas was sleeping somewhere outside their dorm, returning only to grab fresh clothes, and she was sitting far away from them in their classes.
Around 11, Narcissa walked past the angry caretaker Filch, muttering something about dungbombs and “That Potter boy.” She smiled slightly before popping open her umbrella and stepping out into the grey morning, trailing just far enough behind a group of Ravenclaw Third Years that she could avoid having to listen to their conversation.
As the Hogwarts grounds transformed into a bustling village, the rain poured harder than before. Narcissa strode quickly past Madam Puddifoots, outfitted in pink and red heart-shaped garlands, The Three Broomsticks, no patrons outside smoking a cigarette today, and around the corner before approaching a nondescript building with a sign over a rickety wooden door than read “The Cauldron.”
The Cauldron was an old bar with mismatched wooden chairs and a muggle jukebox in the corner. She scanned the room upon entering. The few adult patrons who braved a students’ weekend in Hogsmeade congregated near the front of the room, their table covered in amber-filled glasses. Behind the bar pouring drinks was a tall older woman with red hair and freckles, and perched on a barstool, looking careful not to touch anything, was a teenager with long black hair, Hogwarts robes, and green earmuffs.
“Regulus,” Narcissa said as she sat down next to him.
“Sirius invited you too?” Regulus looked more intrigued than surprised.
“What can I get you?” the bartender asked gruffly. After glancing around for a wine list and finding none, Narcissa ordered a butterbeer for both her and Reg. The woman silently summoned two bottles from the back of the bar, popped the tops off, and slid them over the counter. Narcissa and Regulus carried their drinks over to a table far away from the counter and sat down opposite one another.
“Did you know Bella was the first person to take the Mark?” Narcissa asked him.
“I think I did know that,” Regulus said thoughtfully. “Why do you ask?”
“Lulu told —” But at that moment the door to The Cauldron flew open, ushering in a damp breeze. Turning to look, they saw Sirius pause in the doorframe, examine them, then stride right over to them, removing the Gryffindor scarf covering his hair. He did not smile at them as he approached, nor did he sit down. Regulus stood up.
“You wanted to talk?” Sirius asked.
Narcissa was taken back, but Regulus groaned. “James,” was all he said.
“Right, he told me that you… oh. I caused a row with Mary for this?”
Narcissa stared at Sirius, really examined his face. Beyond the recent addition of a gold hoop earring, he still looked the same, no physical changes that reflected the event that occupied her mind as the scariest day of her life. She looked at him and saw familiarity, a face that reminded her of a kinder version of Bella.
Narcissa fought the urge to grab onto Sirius, to make sure he didn’t disappear again. Regulus also looked torn between hugging Sirius and hitting him. For a long moment, they just stared at each other, none knowing how to begin.
“I’m sorry,” Regulus burst out with a pleading look at Sirius. “I’ve been trying to tell you.”
Sirius stared back at Reg, face blank, long enough that Narcissa’s stomach knotted in anxiety. Then Sirius reached out and pulled Regulus into a hug.
“I’m not angry with you,” Sirius said, sounding for all the world like the 16-year-old boy he was. “I’m mad at our family for being the world’s shittiest.” Narcissa rolled her eyes. “Did they punish you badly?”
Narcissa felt momentarily ashamed that she had not considered how Auntie Walburga would punish Regulus for Sirius’ transgressions.
“There’s been worse,” Regulus said grimly. “Though I suppose they have to be more careful now, now that they’re down to the spare.” He grinned wryly.
“So why did James want us to talk?” Narcissa interjected. “Not that I mind the honor of your company, oh Black sheep. But…”
“Ugh, he’s been trying to get me to ‘get you to safety’ or whatever,” Sirius said to Regulus, casually, and they both sat down, but Narcissa thought he was more earnest than he was letting on. “I told him you’re a power-hungry blood supremacist though so he shouldn’t waste his time, but he’s persisted. I assume he thought you’d be the voice of reason,” he directed this at Narcissa.
“We’re not blood supremacists,” Narcissa gave Sirius a dirty look.
“Lulu Wilkes hexed Lily Evans in the loo for being muggle born just after their prefects’ meeting this week. Crouch and Snape harassed Mary in front of me a couple days ago, and Mulciber made her cry last week.”
“Okay, obviously they shouldn’t have done that, but that doesn’t mean we’re all blood supremacists. It seems like your girlfriend needs to get a grip on her emotions,” Narcissa insisted, then caught the murderous look on Sirius’ face and knew she’d crossed a line. “Our friends are making questionable decisions. What do you want us to do about it?”
“What are you doing to show you’re not like them?” Sirius pushed. Narcissa came up short. It was quiet for a moment.
“Well, we haven’t taken the Mark,” she offered, looking at Regulus for help.
“Oh great,” Sirius interrupted. “Two teenagers haven’t gotten a creepy tattoo. You’re both bloody heroes.”
“Look, I’m not sure what you want us to say,” Narcissa snapped, putting her glass down on the table with a loud thud. “You want me to be a ‘voice of reason’? There is zero chance your parents will lose both you and Regulus. It’s a nice gesture for you to ask him to go to the Potters with you, but that’s all it is. You know he can’t.”
How strange it was to feel such hot fury at someone with whom she had a deep childhood bond.
“Sirius, listen, ” Regulus said, trying to stay calm. They both turned to look at him. “I appreciate what you’re trying to do here. You think you’ve reached safety, that you are on some ‘golden side’ of a war where doing good will absolve you of any guilt you feel over abandoning me for James Potter —”
“I am literally inviting you to come live with me!” Sirius exclaimed, scowling.
“I’m not talking about Christmas, Sirius. I mean since you left for Hogwarts your first year and didn’t look back. And that’s fine; I’m happy for you. I’m happy one of us got out. But Cissy is right; Mum and Dad would destroy everyone and everything either of us love if I tried to leave too.”
Sirius looked momentarily ashamed.
“And besides, you think if I came to your side I’d somehow be saved? As if your lot aren’t also rallying around a leader. I’d just become a pawn in Dumbledore’s army instead of Lord Voldemort’s,” Regulus spat.
This was the third time in as many weeks her peers had brought up “choosing sides.” “The world isn’t split into good people and Death Eaters,” she said to her cousins, almost pleadingly, but they both looked at her with pity.
“Except, right now, it is,” Sirius said. “James’ dad says Voldemort’s followers are growing, they’ve infiltrated the ministry, they’re on other continents. They’re murdering muggles and muggleborns for sport. If you aren’t actively against that, you’re giving them a pass, and you’re just as bad as those casting the spell.”
“We’re 16!” Narcissa hissed, aware of their proximity to other patrons. “I’m not going to war! I’m trying to pass my O.W.L.s! You’re trying to shag Mary Macdonald! We’re not soldiers, Sirius; we’re students!”
“My own parents used an unforgivable curse on me because of your sister,” Sirius said coldly. “We’re not just students. The war is happening in our own homes, with our own families. My parents disowned me over it. Pretending it’s not happening to us is just delusional.” He tightened his cloak around him as he spoke. “James is the best person I know, and he believes the best in everybody. He wants us to reconcile our differences, I’m sure. But I’ve made my choice. And you can make whatever excuses help you sleep at night, and the offer stands for you to come to the right side in what will inevitably lead to Voldemort’s destruction. But you two are acting spineless. Reg, I miss you. But I can’t be around you if you’re not against what our parents support.” With that, Sirius flipped his hair over his shoulder and turned around, walking out into the rainstorm without a backward glance.
“I’m sorry, Reg. He doesn’t get it,” Narcissa began, but Regulus held up his hand.
“It’s fine,” he said, although the ugly expression on his face clearly said otherwise. “He’s just a piece for Dumbledore to flaunt, one of the greatest pureblood heirs as a spy for their side. We’re all pieces in our parents’ war. Both sides are going to have casualties. We’ll see who's left in the end.”
Regulus placed a galleon on the table. “I’ll see you back at the castle,” he said, sighing. “No point in staying around here. Crap weather. Crap day.”
Narcissa shook her head at him. “He thinks he’s some righteous rebel, talking the way he does. He thinks it’s noble, all the ‘good versus evil’ talk, but maybe it is a little, but I don’t really see a world where our parents don’t end up on top.”
Regulus smiled but it came off more like a grimace. “Well, he’ll see we’re right in the end.”
Narcissa popped by the loo before leaving The Cauldron to meet up with Evan and Lulu, and it wasn’t until she was on her way out that she caught a glimpse of familiar blond hair from a booth tucked away in the back of the bar. Theo was here, facing in her direction. And who was that he was gazing at, absorbed in conversation? She caught sight of a short, dark shoulder-length haircut, then ducked her own head down, not wanting to call attention to herself. When she passed by their table, she chanced a glance behind her, but the girl’s face was obscured behind Theo. Odd, she thought, wondering who he might be keeping a secret from her and why.
The rain had turned to wet snowflakes leaving a watery path for Narcissa to treat carefully through as she made her way to the Three Broomsticks. She walked past couples holding hands as they scurried between warm buildings, holding bags of sweets from Honeydukes or toy wands from Zonko’s .
The atmosphere at the Three Broomsticks was much more welcoming than The Cauldron. There was more light, a roaring fireplace, and a friendlier young barmaid named Rosmerta. Hogwarts students were gathered in groups, the younger kids sipping on butterbeer, the older kids sneaking firewhiskey into their hot apple ciders.
“Cissy, hi!” Lulu called out to her from a booth, waving her over to where she was practically sitting on Evan’s lap . Narcissa smoothed her hair, long and wavy, as she approached. They were seated with most of the Slytherin Quidditch team and their friends. Mulciber was telling a rather distasteful story about a time he ate one of his own boogers on a dare when Narcissa caught a glimpse of pretty light brown curls at a table closer toward the bar. She stared, willing the group of Fourth Years to shift slightly so she could get a clearer view.
“Grabbing a drink,” she said casually to Lulu, everyone else in various states of retching over Mulciber’s story.
At the bar, Narcissa ordered a butterbeer and peeked over by the window. She caught sight of Artemis, eyes crinkling as she laughed along with her friends. Narcissa let her hair fall in front of her face, angling away from the booth so her ogling would be less noticeable should Artemis glance her way. She returned to her friends, accepting a strong pour of firewhiskey into her drink, but mostly tuned out, half her mind on thinking Sirius had just made her feel indignant enough to finally want to take a side in the war, and the other half hyper-aware of the girl she’d almost kissed last week.
She felt Artemis’ presence before she saw her, approaching their table with a force field all her own. Narcissa immediately felt her cheeks heat up.
“The team’s all here! Both Beaters, two Chasers, and our Keeper,” Beatrice exclaimed. “Now’s a perfect time to strategize against Hufflepuff.”
Evan and Theo shouted her down, Artemis smiling at them before looking coolly at Narcissa. “Mind if I sit here?” she asked, and Narcissa scooted closer to Evan so Artemis could pull up a stool. Narcissa could tell neither she nor Artemis were really listening to the rest of the Slytherins who, due to a second flask of firewhiskey, this time procured by Evan, were getting rowdy. She was mostly thinking about how close her body was to Artemis’, her arms pressed into her sides to avoid accidental contact, her ankles crossed to keep her legs from nervously swinging. Finally, Artemis turned to look at Narcissa.
“It’s a little loud in here,” she said, leaning close to Narcissa so she could hear her over the Slytherins’ roars of laughter. “Walk with me?”
“Alright,” Narcissa slipped her cloak back on and followed Artemis’ out the door. The sleeting weather had let up and they ambled along the cobblestone path around the side of the Three Broomsticks, anxiety building in the silent moments before Artemis finally spoke up.
“I wanted to apologize if I overstepped at the Quidditch party,” she said, looking earnestly up at Narcissa. “I don’t want to hurt our Quidditch team, or our… friendship.”
“You didn’t,” Narcissa said, flooded with relief, her ice blue eyes serious. And for the first time since Christmas, she wasn’t thinking about her family, her visions, her fighting roommates, or even the war. She didn’t think of anything at all besides the fact that she desperately wanted to taste Artemis’ pretty pink lips. Narcissa leaned down and kissed her, and Artemis kissed her back, and it felt like a thousand butterflies had taken up residence in her stomach and in her heart.
Notes:
song: guilty as sin - TS
Chapter 7: Chapter Seven: Prophecies & The Prophet
Summary:
narcissa goes to the ministry
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
I’m seeing visions, am I bad?
or mad, or wise?
“Career Advice” was emblazoned in big letters across a green flyer posted in the Common Room along with a scheduled time. Narcissa’s appointment was with Professor Slughorn at the end of March. Prior to meeting with their Head of House, the Fifth Years were to spend a weekday visiting a profession of their choice. Professor Slughorn had asked her if she wanted to sign up for the St. Mungo’s trip as she was quite the skilled potioneer, but the thought of being around anyone doing any form of oozing made her want to vomit. She remembered what Artemis said about wanting to write for the Daily Prophet, though, and having no better ideas, she asked Professor Slughorn to sign her up for the trip to the Ministry of Magic.
Narcissa was scheduled to depart for the Ministry after breakfast, and she headed toward Professor Slughorn’s office, wondering if anyone could tell she suddenly felt like she was glowing as she walked through the hallways, carrying her bookbag, caught up in daydreams. She had just spent the last forty-five minutes sitting next to Artemis as they talked to different groups of friends, backs of their hands accidentally-on-purpose touching, feet interlocked underneath the table. So this was what Lulu had felt like back when she and Evan had started going out , she thought, her mind wholly preoccupied by a brand new person. Narcissa and Artemis had had a few stolen moments after practices, snogging (and Narcissa could hardly believe she had become this classless of a person) in the changing rooms. But she felt intrigued and just the right amount of nervous around Artemis that she always felt relieved when she saw her, as though their tender romance might be a figment of her imagination, and their brief interactions always left her always wanting more. She hoped she would see her after Quidditch that night.
When Narcissa arrived at Professor Slughorn’s office, Peter Pettigrew, Sirius’ little friend from Gryffindor, was already waiting, along with June Belfiore-Wong, a half-Chinese Ravenclaw student with short dark hair, and Amos Diggory and Pius Thicknesse, one tall with handsome golden hair and one stout with a square face, both Hufflepuffs.
“Welcome, my dear,” Slughorn greeted her, ushering her into his office where the fire was already lit, green floo powder in a flowerpot on the mantle. “We’re just waiting for a few more. Olivia Williams of Hufflepuff, you know, her grandfather is a Ministry man, and Ronald Davies and Galvin Gudgeon as well, both of their fathers old school friends of mine.”
Narcissa smiled politely at him, but Slughorn did not seem to be looking for a response. The shelves in his office were lined with signed photographs that moved, famous Quidditch stars up in the air, hand thrust high as they held a golden snitch in victory, or glamorous singers, smiling next to Slughorn with faces full of makeup.
Once everyone arrived, Slughorn ushered them one by one into the green flames. A few uncomfortably suffocating moments later, Narcissa stepped out of the Floo and into the Ministry of Magic, smoothing out her robes. Witches and Wizards were bustling along the cool, shiny black corridors, and the occasional owl swooped by, notes or small packages tied to their legs with a green ribbon. June and Ronald, both muggleborn, expressed cries of excitement at the scene before them: the grandness of the marble entrance hall, the hurriedness of its occupants. The others had all visited the Ministry before, accompanying their parents to register their home with the Floo network at the Department of Transportation or to renew their wizarding identification at the Department of Magical Verification.
A short wizard wearing peacock-blue robes and a nametag that read Trevor greeted them nearby the reception desk. “You’re here for the school tour, I presume?” he said to Slughorn in a thin, reedy voice, and he guided them all to gather around him in a semicircle, his back to a magical fountain inlaid in the ground in the center of the room. Three shimmering dragons soared out of its waters, each spouting a stream of water in lieu of fire.
Trevor stood, wand levitating a weathered piece of parchment in front of him, taking a deep breath before beginning his speech: “Welcome, scholars, to the Ministry of Magic, founded in 1707, making it one of the oldest and grandest wizarding institutions in the world. Today you each will have a chance to shadow an important member of our workforce who keeps the wizarding world running without any hiccups.” He glanced around at each of them before continuing. “Come, let’s gather into the lift. We’re going to stop first at the Auror Office, where we will drop off –” here he consulted the parchment in his hands – “a Ms. June Belfiore-Wong.”
Slughorn waved his pupils away with Trevor into the lift, murmuring something about seeing an old friend from the Wimbourne Wasps and that he’d meet them after lunch by the fountain. The lift was owl-free, full enough with a group of teens and one adult awkwardly crowded into the small space. “Level One, Department of Magical Law Enforcement,” stated a cool voice.
“Off you go, Ms. Belfiore-Wong,” Trevor said, and shooed her out of the lift. “A Mr. Moody” — (here he looked slightly concerned) — “will meet you shortly.” The lift continued down to Level Four, where Diggory was dropped off to meet with the junior assistant for the Department of Regulations and Control of Magical Creatures. On Level Five, Narcissa too was quickly ejected from the elevator and was promptly greeted by a young woman with curly blonde hair, cat-eye glasses, and a wicked smile.
“Welcome!” said the young witch, who, despite her Ministry robes, looked as though she had only just finished up at Hogwarts. “You must be Narcissa. My name is Rita. I’m an investigative journalist here at the Daily Prophet .” Narcissa looked around, taking in the chaos of the newsroom. At several square wooden tables front of her, typewriters clacked noisily away as wizards and witches dictated their stories aloud. To her left, a witch swapped out one moving photograph with another in a layout for a profile on a St. Mungo’s healer, and to her right, Rita was leading her towards a tiny cubicle.
“What kinds of stories do you investigate?” Narcissa asked, observing the cheerful decorations around Rita’s desk. A garland of daisies was strung above her typewriter, and two photographs were tacked just above her desk. In one photo, Rita and a boy with similarly curly blond hair stood together in their Hogwarts robes, rolling their eyes and smiling at whoever was taking the picture, and in another, Rita and a group of girls posed together, giggling, on a four-poster with deep blue curtains; Rita was a Ravenclaw then, Narcissa noted.
“Oh, it’s still my first year here, so I’ve been mostly running errands and arranging interviews,” Rita said, then lowered her voice. “I’ve been trying to work my way onto this big exposée some of the senior writers have been working on. I can’t say too much, but it has to do with some of the dark magic that’s been popping up around the Ministry lately.” She raised her eyebrows at Narcissa, and Narcissa wondered if Rita would be telling her this if she knew who Narcissa’s family was. “Today though, you can come with me while I arrange different interviews for my boss, Marcia. It won’t be super exciting, but at least you can see some of the Ministry in action!” Rita picked up a list off of her desk and sighed. “The first person we need to speak with is all the way down in the Wizenmagot. Are you ready?”
Narcissa followed Rita back across the noisy floor and into the lift. They began to descend further into the depths of the Ministry, witches and wizards stepping on and off at different floors, owls flying in and out with a soft hoot of a greeting. Rita nattered on about missing Hogwarts, asking about how her favorite professors were doing, and then eventually asked Narcissa why she’d wanted to become a journalist. Narcissa said she liked to know information and left it at that. Rita was friendly but her constant chatter was overwhelming. As they stepped out of the lift and into a dark corridor, Narcissa felt a bit dizzy. Being so far underground must be messing with her head. Rita began to describe a wizard she hoped to run into down in the Wizenmagot; someone she thought was quite handsome, and Narcissa stopped trying to pay attention and focused on taking deep breaths. Nausea rose and darkness began to encroach on her vision as they walked further down the cool hall, the only light coming from torches flickering every few meters along the wall. “Hopefully we’re walking in on an interesting session. One time I saw a Dementor—” Rita said, then looked over at Narcissa. “Narcissa, what’s wrong?”
Narcissa didn’t have the energy to answer. She stopped and leaned against the wall, eyes closed, and bent over, hands on her knees. Her ears were ringing, and darkness clouded over her vision entirely before she collapsed onto the floor.
“Help! HELP!” Rita screamed into the empty hallway, bending down and shaking Narcissa. “Someone, help !” Rita darted the remaining few feet and burst into the Wizenmagot chambers.
Narcissa remained immobile on the cold floor, paralyzed by the scene playing out before her. Three shadowy figures progressed through the door in front of her, the middle one with shackles clasped to his arms. The shadows became clearer, and she noticed the center shadow had long, straight hair. Then she passed out.
“ Ennervate .” A man’s voice jolted her out of her vision. She heard Rita fretting in the background.
“Narcissa?” the man said, and she opened her eyes to see dark grey ones peering down at her. The nausea was gone, her sight was returning, and she realized her body was currently being held in a wizard’s arms. Lucius Malfoy, to be specific. He looked relieved that she was awake. “Narcissa, it’s me, Lucius. Let’s get you somewhere safe.”
“I’m fine,” she said, her voice shaky, a growing sense of embarrassment at the circumstances that lead to her being held in a young and rather handsome man’s arms. “Really, I’m fine. I just… I didn’t eat enough this morning, I think. I’m sorry.” A few other wizards had stepped outside of the courtroom to see the spectacle, but they disappeared back inside when they realized all the commotion was over a fainting teenage girl.
Rita hovered nearby, looking extremely worried, green eyes wide. “She’s with me!” she told Lucius, who appeared to still be scrutinizing Narcissa. “She’s here for a career day tour of the Daily Prophet !”
“What’s your name?” Lucius asked Rita politely, looking down his long nose at her. His silky blond hair hung straight down his back.
Rita squeaked out her response.
“Okay, Rita. I’m a family friend of Narcissa’s; I can take her back up to your office once she’s been checked out by a Mediwitch. You’re free to take care of whatever business you have down here.”
Rita glanced at Narcissa, clearly torn between her young protogée and her job. Narcissa nodded. “It’s fine; I’ll see you later.” Rita gave her one last glance then scurried toward the chambers.
“Can you please put me down?” Narcissa asked Lucius, wishing more than anything she could just return to Hogwarts.
Lucius Malfoy tenderly set her down on her feet and walked her toward the lift. It was true that he was a family friend, although they’d said no more than a handful of words to each other over the years. He was closer in age to Bellatrix, and based on his reputation, he had more in common with her sister.
“Thank you, but I really don’t need to see a Mediwitch,” she said. “I actually do feel fine.” Lucius ran his eyes over her and must have concluded that she looked better because he didn’t press the issue. “I’m on the same floor as the Prophet ,” he said, once they were moving upwards, “You can stay there for as long as you need.”
“I thought Malfoys didn’t need to work,” she said, raising an eyebrow at him.
“We don’t,” he smirked. “But I like to be here. Get wind of political gossip. I work in magical trading, and a little market manipulation never hurt anyone.”
“I see,” Narcissa said. “You’re not worried about getting caught?”
“Not really. The risks are worth the payoff. Your father feels the same way; I help him out from time to time,” he added. “He got a big windfall from investing in goblin-made armor a few years ago.”
Two young witches in the slate grey robes of the Control of Magical Beasts and Bests department entered the elevator, breaking into giggles upon seeing Lucius, one smiling cheekily at him and the other blushing a deep maroon. He smiled politely at them, and Narcissa noticed he had dimples.
Luckily, they got off the lift on the next floor. “Your office crushes?” she asked.
Lucius laughed, although it wasn’t as warm as she’d expected. “I only date purebloods, Narcissa,” he said. “Obviously.”
“Obviously,” she repeated, although she rolled her eyes.
Lucius had a spacious, private office with a magical window showing a view of London. Despite its ostentatious furnishings, however, the office did not provide the same homey warmth of Rita’s cubicle. Lucius stepped behind his desk and pulled a chocolate frog out of a drawer, handing it to her. She sat down in a leather chair and opened the wrapper. “Thank you,” she said.
“Of course,” he replied. “I hope you’re feeling better.”
In the silence that followed, Narcissa considered what had happened the last time she’d had a vision. With a sinking feeling, she wondered who was on trial in the Wizenmagot today. Who was the person with the long hair being escorted by dementors, and how did she know them? A vision as a one time thing, fine, whatever. But if this was going to happen unpredictably, how could she live her life this way, always afraid? Her vision with Sirius had come true just hours later; would this one follow suit, or would she end up spending weeks or years in anticipation of returning to the Wizenmagot and having some kind of traumatic moment happen to someone she cared about? She was torn: she wanted to tell someone, to warn someone, but what could she say without seeming crazy?
Lucius sat down at his desk, going over a piece of parchment line by line with a quill. He had been at Sirius’ house over Christmas… if she told him, he might believe her; after all, it was possible Bella had told him about the events of Christmas Eve. On the other hand, he’d already caught her fainting today, he might think she was a fibbing kid or even insist on taking her to see the mediwitch after all. The more she thought about her dilemma, the more overwhelmed she felt. Her frustration spilled over and she felt tears prickling in the corners of her eyes. Luckily, Lucius was too absorbed in his document to notice.
She took deep breaths until she felt sufficiently calm to ask Lucius for a spare quill and piece of parchment. He handed her a few without question.
She scratched out a letter:
Andromeda,
In case you didn’t receive my last letter, I am sending another one. I need my sister
Andromeda,
Why haven’t you responded to my last letter? I am possibly losing my mind, and I will do crazy things if I don’t hear back from you.
Bitch, write me back.
Andromeda,
I need to speak with you. Weird things are happening — both at Christmas and at the Ministry of Magic today. In case you forgot, I can be reached by owl at Hogwarts. Alternatively, you can come see me play Quidditch at our next match and we can talk then. Please reply.
Your loving and possibly slightly insane sister.
~Cissy
Narcissa vanished her drafts and tucked her letter into her pocket to mail when she returned to Hogwarts. Rita appeared at Lucius’ office door shortly after, looking slightly pink in the face when she let him know she was there to collect Narcissa.
“Take care of yourself,” Lucius said, looking up from his work, his grey eyes fixed on her.
She smiled at him and stood up to follow Rita. As she exited the office, she turned around once more to glance back at Lucius. Looking at him in profile, she noticed how similar his long blond hair looked to the person in her vision. She gasped, lips parted slightly. He looked up at her, questioningly.
“Take care of yourself too,” she said, and walked after Rita back into the office, stunned.
“How well do you know Lucius Malfoy?” Rita asked, her tone hushed.
“Uh, not that well. His family knows my parents.”
Rita raised her eyebrows. “He’s got a bit of a reputation around the Ministry.” Narcissa wondered if Rita was going to tell her that the Malfoy family was part of the piece being written on dark magic. Was that how he connected to her vision? Had he gone as deep in with the Dark Lord as Bellatrix? She worried that the next thing she knew she’d be hearing about him being taken away by dementors.
Rita leaned in close and whispered earnestly, “He’s a bit of… you know... a slag.”
Narcissa was so surprised by this that she laughed and laughed, eventually wiping tears from her eyes. “Thanks for that, Rita,” she said.
She was relieved to finally return to Hogwarts, running into Theo on her way back from Slughorn’s office. She thought about confessing her visions to him right then and there, but apparently he had a question for old Sluggy about a Potions essay. He talked for a minute about his career day visit to Gringotts shadowing a cursebreaker, then told her he had to get to his appointment, so she continued on to the Owlery alone.
Narcissa made her way toward the owlery; by the time she reached it, evening had already started to fall over the grounds. A full moon was rising up in the night sky, casting a shadow across the grounds. She looked out from the tower for a moment; to her surprise, she spotted two figures, one short and plump, the other tall and lanky, walking across the grounds towards the Whomping Willow.
A distraction in the form of Nocturna diverted her attention from the grounds. Her snowy owl alighted on her shoulder, her downy feathers brushing Narcissa’s cheek in greeting. “Hello, lady,” Narcissa whispered, petting her owl’s head affectionately. “This is for Andromeda. Don’t let her send you away without a reply.” She fixed her plea for help to Nocturna’s leg, and sent her off into the darkness.
Narcissa stood there for a moment, feeling the weight of today’s events crushing down on her once more. She was almost positive the person in her vision had been Lucius, and she wondered if his fate indeed lay with the dementors. And if so, how many others in her family were going to suffer the same fate? Bellatrix? Her parents? Lulu and Evan? Herself? But hadn’t she chosen her side just the other day after her fight with Sirius; she’d made a choice, and she’d chosen family over good.
Narcissa had no way of knowing it, but just across the grounds and through a tunnel, four teenage boys, much braver than her, were sitting in the Shrieking Shack, visions of being heroes, of saving the wizarding world from evil, dancing across their minds.
Notes:
okay so sorry it's been 4 ever since i've posted! i just moved internationally and it turns out that is quite time consuming !
lyrics: guilty as sin TS
Chapter 8: Secrets & Sisters
Summary:
narcissa and theo have a lil catch up
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Chapter Eight | Secrets & Sisters
but I stay
when you’re lost, and I’m scared,
and you’re turning away
Please don't ever become a stranger
Whose laugh I could recognize anywhere
May & June
April turned into May and the fifth years’ workload increased more than Narcissa previously thought was possible. It didn’t matter that Lulu and Dorcas were no longer on speaking terms; the fifth years barely spent any time outside of the library, and mealtimes were usually spent cramming facts on strengthening solutions or memorizing properties of kneazles and knarls.
Narcissa spent her days with the discipline and comportment expected of a perfect Black heir, waking up early to exercise before breakfast (she’d had to start running on a trail through the grounds to avoid James Potter), sitting in the front row in all classes to remain as focused on notetaking as possible, and getting homework and revision done in the hours between classes and Quidditch practice. Between the hours of six in the morning and eight in the evening, she was perfect, so no one would suspect what she was doing with her time once everybody else had gone to sleep. She wasn’t sure if it was the pureblood in her, but she felt that what she was doing was fairly deviant; however, she had no interest in stopping snogging Artemis’ face off every chance she got. She just needed to make sure she didn’t get caught.
Spending time with Artemis felt like pure escape. Narcissa made some of her most treasured memories at Hogwarts that spring— at the Astronomy Tower where they laid for hours with their hands intertwined, talking as the stars blinked into existence across the evening sky, and down at the lake where they sat hidden from view of the castle, one girl’s knees knocking up against the other’s as they snuggled close for warmth. She learned that Artemis’ older siblings had been in Ravenclaw, taking after their father; their mother had also been a Slytherin. She learned that every summer Artemis’ older siblings took her to Glastonbury Festival; despite being a magical household, her parents let her siblings participate in muggle culture. Narcissa told Artemis about their summer vacations to France as kids— the first time Bella had snuck out of Aunt Batty’s house to go to a party and come home so bladdered she had vomited into the cat’s litter box, and how none of them were old enough to do magic outside of Hogwarts to vanish it; another summer when Andromeda had met a Beaxbatons student named Ted when he saved her from a jellyfish, and they’d been inseparable ever since; and how Dromeda and Ted had an adorable baby named Dori (here Narcissa was briefly sad, realizing her sister still hadn’t answered her message, but she was determined to leave reality out of her evenings with Artemis). At fifteen, Narcissa wasn’t sure she could be in love, but she was smart enough to know she had become infatuated. She didn’t care.
Narcissa’s lack of sleep finally caught up to her the week of exams. In a moment of quiet, around two in the morning, she fell asleep with her head on Artemis’ lap in the rose garden near the greenhouses. Both girls slept solidly until the next morning when Theo arrived early to review before his nine o’clock exam.
“Narcissa?” Theo yelped as walked down the gravel path, causing both girls to push away from each other immediately.
“What time is it?” Artemis asked, realizing the sun had fully risen, at the same time as Narcissa jumped up and said, “We just got here early! To study!”
“To study what? Each other?” Theo raised his eyebrows at her as Artemis pushed herself to her feet. “Your Herbology exam isn’t until tomorrow.”
“I’m late for Potions,” Artemis said into the tense silence. “I’ll see you guys around.” She smiled hesitantly at both of them before quickly disappearing back up the path.
Narcissa looked out over the grounds, away from Theo’s concerned face, desperate for some scrap of dignity, possibly looking for some kind of divine intervention to save her, but she knew she couldn’t fib her way out of this.
“You don’t have to hide anything from me,” Theo said finally. “We can tell each other things, remember?”
“Can we?” Narcissa said, whipping back around to stare at him, suddenly defensive. “Who were you with in Hogsmeade on Valentine’s Day ?”
Theo took a deep breath and started to speak, then apparently thought the better of it. “Okay, so we used to be able to tell each other things.”
They heard the wheezing sound accompanied by the slow gait of an older witch or wizard making their way along the path; the examining professor must be approaching. “After dinner tonight,” Narcissa said. “We can have a proper talk.”
“Meet me at the Astronomy Tower?” Theo said.
“I’ll bring an agenda,” Narcissa smiled weakly at him, then headed off to the dungeons to get herself together.
She didn’t have enough time to be anxious about being caught because she needed to be anxious about her History of Magic exam that afternoon. She freshened up before stopping by the kitchens to grab some toast on her way to the library. There she met with Lulu and Evan, who were also preparing for History of Magic. They quizzed each other on Giant rebellions, the founding of Gringotts, the history and brief privatization of the Owl Postal Service, and the contentious goblin-made goods trade. After lunch, they remained in the Great Hall, where the long dining tables had been replaced with individual exam desks, and every student had been provided with an anti-cheating Quill. Sirius was sitting right behind her. She tuned him out entirely.
Narcissa finished her exam a few minutes early, feeling she had done reasonably well; history was mostly just memorizing, after all. She used a spare sheet of scratch paper and wrote “N + T Friendship Meeting Agenda” across the top.
Topics shall include:
- Theo’s Secret Valentine
- Narcissa’s not-so-secret garden tryst
- L + E’s secret tattoo taking
- N + T’s sixteenth birthdays (not a secret)
- Summer plans (secret in that they are yet to be determined)
Dinner that evening was abuzz with gossip about what James Potter and Sirius Black had done to Snape. “They dangled him upside down from a tree!” she’d heard a third year exclaim. “You could see his underwear,” a sixth year whispered to his friend. Severus himself was not present to comment, but Lulu was. “Honestly, it was funny. Who’d have thought Potter had it in him?”
Narcissa squinted across the Great Hall for her cousin and his friends, but all four were noticeably absent from dinner. She felt relatively ambivalent about Snape, but this seemed particularly cruel, especially coming from two boys obsessed with “fighting evil” and all that. She herself had missed the spectacle; she’d sat down to study in the Slytherin common room after finding Artemis to tell her she couldn’t meet up tonight and had accidentally fallen asleep.
Narcissa parted ways with Lulu after dinner; Lulu had prefect duty, and Narcissa made a claim about her last night of revision. She made her way to the Astronomy Tower by ducking behind a second-floor mural of the night sky, constellations painted in winking yellow stars. She stepped off the magical staircase and climbed the stone spiral one up to the top of the tower, her anxiety rising with each step she took. She tried to calm herself down. It was just Theo; of all people, he was least likely to out her to the entire school and all of their families and also the world. She took several deep breaths.
Indeed, Theo was waiting, looking relaxed on a poofy cushion which had been a stone gargoyle only minute before, gesturing for her to join him on another previously-a- gargoyle cushion next to him.
She pulled her agenda out of her bag and handed it to Theo, who smirked as he read it. “Why are we starting with my secret Valentine and not your not-so-secret tryst?” he teased.
“I need you to go first,” she said, settling cross-legged onto her seat. “Please.”
Theo closed his eyes, leaned back, and sighed. “Okay. Well, okay. I normally would assume this, but we haven’t really talked in a while… since before we found out about Lulu and Theo taking the mark. So I just need to hear you say you won’t tell anyone else this.” He opened his eyes and looked directly at her.
His gaze pierced her heart like an arrow; what had happened between them that he’d have to say this? “Of course not,” she replied.
“Okay, well, I’ve been dating someone who’s muggle-born,” he said. “Which isn’t a big deal to me, but is to… pretty much everybody else we know.”
Narcissa’s first thought was that Theo was being irresponsibly reckless, but she knew better than to say that out loud. “Who is it?” she asked, keeping her face neutral.
Theo watched her carefully. “Do you know June Belfiore? From Ravenclaw?” Narcissa remembered the curtain of dark hair she’d seen in the booth at the Hog’s Head.
“Yes. She was just on the Career Day trip to the Ministry with me.”
“Right, she shadowed some insane Auror who kept trying to jinx her all day.”
“What?”
“Yeah. Then at the end of the day, he told her she’d gotten his approval and she should send in her application when we leave Hogwarts.” Theo laughed. “June is tough, and she’s really smart. She’ll be a good Auror.”
Narcissa leaned back against the tower wall, looking up at the sky streaked with pink and orange as the sun set behind the castle ramparts. Theo dating a muggle-born future Auror, the antithesis of a Death Eater. His dad would disown him. “I understand why you didn’t want to tell anyone,” she said, then looked back at him. “How long has this been going on?”
He ran a hand through his hair. “Just before Christmas,” he said. “She saw me struggling with one of McGonagall’s essays and offered to help and then we kind of just kept… hanging out. But going home for Christmas and hearing my dad talk about me taking the mark this year solidified my decision not to tell anyone. I can’t have it getting back to him; he’d take me out of Hogwarts.”
She grimaced. “Yeah, I think you’re right.” She nudged him with her shoulder. “Hey. I’m happy for you though.”
He shrugged. “I really wish we didn’t have to keep things a secret. I wish we could do normal couple things like Evan and Lu.”
“I do not think they should be your benchmark for normal,” Narcissa said. Theo laughed.
“So, check that off your list,” he said. “Now it’s your turn. You and Artemis? Saw that one coming.”
“Really?”
“Please,” he said. “I was wondering after I saw you both in the Owlery; you were so flustered. It was funny.”
Narcissa groaned.
“And we’re all on Quidditch together; I see you making eyes at each other,” Theo said.
“No,” Narcissa said, her breath catching in sudden panic. “Everyone knows?”
“No one knows,” Theo said. “No one on the team knows you as well as I do. And honestly, no one’s paying attention, except maybe Avery, and I think even if you snogged Artemis in front of him he’d still think it was about him.”
She wrinkled her nose. “True.”
“So I take it you haven’t told Lulu either.”
“I haven’t told anyone,” Narcissa said. “Because although Artemis is pureblood, she is also a girl, and I’m not stupid. Are you judging me?”
“Of course not,” Theo said. “I’m in no position to judge. And besides, it’s good to know you’ll allow someone to warm that little heart of yours.”
She rolled her eyes.
The sky was growing darker now, painted with the purple hues of dusk, and it was starting to grow colder. Narcissa conjured a jar and spelled a little flame inside of it to keep them warm. “Next on the list: secret tattoos.”
“Goes along nicely with sixteenth birthdays,” Theo said. “I have until July to figure out how to talk my dad out of making me take the mark.”
“You mean you don’t want a creepy tattoo of a skull on your arm? Why ever not?”
“How do you think it even works?” Theo asked. “Like, do they communicate with it? Do you think Death Eaters are sending messages to Lu and Ev while they’re, like, sleeping in our dormitories next to us?” He shuddered.
“I’m afraid to ask,” Narcissa said. “Some things are better left unknown. Besides, how are you going to get your dad to agree to let you wait? Tell him you need to finish your education first? Tell him Lulu and Evan are getting pressured to drop out now that they have their marks!”
“I don’t want to give him any ideas,” Theo said darkly. “Do you think they’ll really leave?”
Narcissa shrugged. “I hope not,” she said, then she was quiet for a moment. “But it might make it easier to… you know, be a student still. Not talk about blood status all the time. Maybe Dorcas would talk to us again.”
“Evan’s one of my best mates,” Theo said. “And obviously Lulu too. But they’re off the deep end a bit. You know I actually caught Lulu trying to hex that Ravenclaw beater who got you with the bludger? I stopped her before it got out of hand, and she said she was just trying to “defend you,” but I don’t think it’s a coincidence he’s muggleborn.”
Narcissa looked at him, horrified. “You should have told me.”
Theo shrugged. “I’m not interested in any of this ‘war’ stuff, Narcissa. We have two more years here, then we can figure out the adult stuff. Hopefully it’ll all be over by then.”
Narcissa thought about her uncle’s speech at Christmas, about loyalty to the Dark Lord, about returning the wizarding world to its former glory. It didn’t seem like the type of revolution that would be over in a couple of years; in fact, it seemed like it was only gaining momentum. Narcissa kept this to herself, though; she hoped she was wrong, and someday the story of her adult sister helping her 15-year-old classmates get Dark Marks tattooed on their arms would be a distant memory, a bad dream.
“It’s getting a bit cold,” she remarked, and pushed herself up to stand.
Theo stood up too, and grabbed her hand. He squeezed it once. She smiled at him, then turned to vanish both the cushions and the glass jar; it had felt nice to talk to Theo again, to trust him with some of her secrets. She hadn't intentionally shut him out; she hoped he knew that. Back inside the castle, they spoke only of the upcoming Quidditch match on their way down to the dungeons.
Exams finished that Friday, and the majority of fifth and seventh years were celebrating in their Common Rooms or out on the Great Lawn. Unfortunately, Bea had other plans. The Slytherin-Gryffindor House Cup was Saturday, and Bea was in full on war-mode. Narcissa hadn’t caught Artemis alone yet since she and Theo had spoken, but sweet Theo’s warm smile and roguish clap on the shoulder let Artemis know everything was okay; Theo wasn’t holding judgement.
The morning of the match dawned with clear skies and low wind. The morning air was still a bit brisk but Narcissa didn’t notice as the pre-match adrenaline coursed through her. This was Bea’s final Quidditch House Cup; next year she’d be entering the real world as a Potioneer at St. Mungo’s, and she was hungry for one last victory. Narcissa aimed to deliver.
Bea’s hand-picked Slytherin team walked single-file out of the changing rooms onto the pitch to screams of excitement coming from all around. Nothing made Narcissa as purely happy as Quidditch, flying as fast as she could urge her broom to go through the air, the thrill of heights, of defying gravity. So, personally, she would have been just as happy to play the match had they been facing Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff; however, after a year of animosity between Slytherin and Gryffindor, the energy of the audience at seeing the two teams face off was palpable.
Narcissa scanned the faces of her opponents -- James, looking determined, hair messed up as always; Sirius, looking regal as ever, even in a Quidditch kit. Neither made eye contact with her or Regulus; they both stared determinedly at Madam Hooch.
“On your marks, get set, … off we go!” Madam Hooch blew her magically amplified whistle and released the golden snitch, and fourteen brooms took off into the air, assuming position.
It was a close game. Narcissa felt she played in top form; she, Artemis, and Avery played faster, harder, better than they ever had before, but the Gryffindor Chasers also seemed to have something to prove; the six of them streaked across the pitch in maroon and emerald blurs. The commentator had trouble keeping up. Theo and Evan did their best to keep the Gryffindors away from the goal posts, and Sirius nearly did terrible damage to Artemis’ rib cage with a bludger, but in the end, it came down to Regulus and the Gryffindor seeker. At the last minute, Gryffindor caught the snitch, and the final Quidditch Match of the 1975-76 school year was over, 160-Gryffindor to 150-Slytherin.
As Madam Hooch blew her whistle to signal the end of the match, the Slytherin team flew to the ground, piling onto Bea, who, tears streaming down her face, allowed them to envelop her in a giant hug. Narcissa felt close to tears herself; it was a bad ending to a highly stressful year. Since no one was paying attention to them, she reached out and briefly held Artemis’ hand.
Narcissa noticed someone standing in her periphery but ignored them, uninterested in anyone outside her Quidditch team at the moment, until she sensed someone walking even closer. She turned her head to check who was behind her and at first she thought she must be dreaming. “Andromeda?”
“Hiya, Cissy,” her older sister said, walking towards her in muggle clothing, jeans and a green jumper. “Got your letter.”
Notes:
song lyrics: new year's day
okay so within the last year or so, my friend got me to listen to TTPD, and now I unfortunately have been listening to a lot of Taylor Swift in the background while I work on this fic, so I retro-added lyrics to the chapters. I know it’s not the right time period but likeee every other fic already did bowie and queen so we’re pretending TS was a famous musical witch played on the wizard radio during the 70s, possibly named Zippy Schumaker or something like that, and that’s that on that
Also my punctuation is atrocious in this chapter but i am simply using semicolons and dashes when my heart tells me it's right :D