Chapter 1: chapter one
Chapter Text
James Potter had no idea how he ended up where he was. He’s staying in on a Friday night while all of his friends, save for Lily, were out at a party celebrating their big win. But James? He was sitting in the library, hair still dripping from his shower fifteen minutes ago, across from Lily, studying for his next exam in Orgo I. It was only his second year in University in America, but he’d already learned that he had previously underestimated the coursework that came with being a double major on the pre-med track. Although that was mostly his own fault. He started out as an undeclared major and at the end of his first year he declared as an education and biochemistry double major. It wasn’t his typical coursework that was making it difficult, it was the six extra credits he decided to take on this year, in order to catch up with the rest of the pre-med students.
His team had won a game about an hour ago, against BC, and instead of celebrating, he was here. In the library. Studying.
James acted like he hated this part of his life, but in reality, he loved learning. That was part of why he was double majoring in education. He couldn’t decide between a teacher or an oncologist.
With this and then him not deciding what to do until his second year, he was quite busy, and rarely had any time to himself. He would wake up and go to the rink for his workout, and instead of music in his headphones, he would be listening to podcasts that had to do with his most recent lecture. After his workout he’d go to class from 10 to 4 on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and then 8 to 2 on Mondays and Wednesdays. After that it was either time for practice and he’d go to the rink again, or he’d go to the library to do his coursework or notes until it was time for practice. After practice he’d go back to his suite, eat dinner, and study until his eyes couldn’t stay open any longer.
Game days looked a bit different, but he was just as busy. It was a difficult way to live your uni years, but he managed just fine. He was catching up to the others in his program, and he was killing it in hockey.
He had just finished setting up his study session when Lily’s voice broke through the music blasting in his headphones. He always turned off the noise cancelling when they were studying together. That was the only exception he made. That, and when Coach was talking.
“James?” Lily asked. He jumped a bit but took one ear off, to signal to her that he could hear her and was listening. “Have you started the review problems in the book or are you not there yet?”
“I finished those before the game,” he said, looking up from his laptop. “Would you like to see them? They took me forever, but I sent them to Flitwick and he corrected them for me, so they’re all correct.”
“I’m just confused on 11B part 4. I just have no idea what it's even asking.”
“Yeah, let me grab it,” he nodded, digging through his bag before producing a very crumpled packet, covered in pencil, pen, and even highlighter. “It's a bit of a mess, and I think I wrote some of the corrections in Spanish by accident, so if you need help reading anything just let me know. I’m just rewatching the lectures and redoing the class problem sets, so nothing really important.”
“Your brain astounds me,” she replied, her voice coated in humor. “I don’t understand how you’re this disorganized and still get the grades you get.”
“I couldn’t even tell you,” James said, laughing and handing it to her.
“Thank you so much, I owe you big time for this, you have no idea,” she said, taking it and flipping to the page she needed.
“You’re checking my next hit, not that asshole Rita. She’s so fucking annoying and everyone always knows what happened within like, an hour of it happening.”
After scanning the page, she sighed and handed it back to him. “This isn’t even Spanish, James.”
“Oh, what?” He asked, grabbing it back and looking at it. “Shit that’s Hindi, my bad. One second, I’ll rewrite it for you. When I’m stressed I just start writing in whatever language I was speaking at the time. I was probably on the phone with Ma.” He started scribbling the English next to the Hindi, not realizing Lily was staring at him in confusion.
“You speak Hindi too? How many languages do you speak?” She asked.
“Only those ones. My mom is Hindu and my dad is Spanish. And then English because, well, yeah. I know a bit of Welsh and French from Remus and Sirius though. Here you go, corrections in English,” he said, looking up and handing it back to her.
“Thank you,” she said, laughing and taking it back. “And that’s a deal.”
James, even though he convinced himself that he had known everything that could have possibly known for that test, only got a 78 on it, which made for a very moody rest of the week.
Sirius had tried, and failed, to convince him that a party would cheer him up, or at the very least distract him from the grade. However, he gave up on that mission real quickly once James snapped at him telling him to shut up.
He had another exam in two days, this time in his anatomy class, so he was spending his time revising the myosin-actin cycle and the structures of various muscles. It was straight hell, but he was the top of his class in that subject, and he wanted to keep it that way.
“Are you sure you don’t want to take a break?” Remus asked, his voice implying that it wasn’t actually a question, and was more of an order. He had had his headphones on for over three hours, doing the same notes and diagrams over and over again, blocking out the rest of the world. Remys was always the one to have to get him out of these disastrous cycles, he had to, Sirius would always get annoyed with him too quickly and lose patience and give up. Remus understood him. For Sirius, school had always come like a second nature to him, but Remus? Remus had to work just as hard as James did to get the grades he does.
“I’m not going to that party,” James warned, taking one of the ears off so he was able to hear him.
“I’m not either,” Remus snorted. “Who do you think I am? I have a paper due tomorrow that I haven’t started the outline for yet. I’m going to the cafe and you’re coming with me. Your laptop and textbook can come, but you swap the headphones out for your earbuds, and you keep one out so we can talk, but you also work. Does that sound okay to you?” James paused to think for a minute before agreeing.
Remus always approached James well when he got like this. He had a habit of fixating on something for so long, and he would only stop when he felt like he was done. The key to getting him out of the dangerous part of his fixation was to let him keep doing it, but add a change to it, and to get him to take off his headphones. That was always the hardest part.
James hated that Remus knew him so well. He truly needed to focus on this content, but with Remus talking about their next game, and Sirius, who decided to tag along once he realized that he really didn’t want to get drunk that night, kept asking questions that he was more than willing to answer. This game was important. It would be the most challenging one of the season.
“Just how badly do you think we’re going to lose?” Sirius asked, obviously trying to get James snapped out of his studying mood. It wasn’t working.
“Sirius, you know we’re probably winning,” James said, still tapping away at his keyboard. “We trained him, we’ve got this. Now, am I allowed to go back to my notes, or is there any other tactic you want to try, and fail at, to get me to stop studying?”
Chapter Text
Turns out that deal that he had made with Lily would come in handy way earlier than he thought it would. His midterm in orgo was next week, and because of his last exam grade, he needed to pull off an 84 on the exam, in order to pass that class and keep his GPA good. To say that he was stressed would be an understatement.
Normally he could spend his extra time studying, but not this time. They had their game against the serpents in two days, with his midterm just three days after. This was their most anticipated and challenging game of the season. They beat them last year, but they didn’t have Regulus Black last year.
James, Remus, and Sirius had all been handpicked by Coach Moody to join the Lions back at their school in Scotland, Hogwarts. The school was notorious for making hugely successful athletes, and they were the top three picks of their class. Their future was bright, everyone thought so.
They had left a year before Regulus had been picked for the Serpents, and since they left, they hadn’t heard anything from him at all.
Not that James could blame him. Neither of them had reached out after what had happened, but James liked to pretend that their lack of communication was due to their busy and rigorous schedules, but he knew he was only fooling himself. He knew why they didn’t talk anymore. Not that either of the others knew. They didn’t need to.
Needless to say, tensions were higher than they had been all year, and with the stress James was already under, he was absolutely ruthless.
During the first two periods, James was getting a bit too rough with the other team. Throwing an elbow here and there, shit talking a bit, nothing too serious, but never at Regulus. He left him alone. His wings on the other hand? Now James was going after them quite a bit. Specifically Mulciber, but he was just giving what he was getting. James had already gotten checked a few times by him, so at this point he was just retaliating.
“Potts,” Sprouts, the Lions’ goalie, started, eyes dead serious as if it were a life or death matter. “We have to win this. And to do that, you need to pull your head out of your ass and stop trying to get into a fight. Respectfully, that is.” He added that last part as if it were an afterthought. As if he had just remembered who he was talking to.
The rest of the team was silent, knowing that speaking to him like that was a risk. James was notorious for having a temper on the ice, and while it had never, not once, been directed towards the team, they didn’t want to be known as the one who caused James Potter to lose it on the ice.
It was between the second and third period, and they were losing by one. If they lost this game, the team would never hear the end of it. The Lions and the Serpents have been rivals for as long as anyone can remember, and the Lions hadn’t lost in three years, so they intended to make it four. However, the Serpents had never had Regulus Black in the past.
“It’s Black,” Johnson, their second line center said. “He’s too good, we can't get a read on him.”
He wasn’t wrong. Regulus Black on the ice was something to behold. He gracefully skated around everyone, almost as if he were dancing. He could aim a shot dead on from anywhere on the ice, so if he didn’t get a point, it was purely the goalie’s fault. When discussing his game, his skill was never brought into question. Everyone who played him went on the ice, scared they would be humiliated by the loss, and they were right to feel that, as they were correct more often than not.
Regulus Black was a prodigy.
“He’s our mirror image,” Remus started, motioning to Sirius and James, who both nodded their agreement. “We trained him, practiced with him. We taught him everything he knows, and he had always been faster than any of us. He’s the fastest skater I’ve ever seen.”
“And that’s including me,” James piped up, making him get smacked upside the head by Sirius.
“That was implied you dumbfuck,” Sirius said, making everyone laugh.
“Defense needs to start playing as though they’re playing against our line,” James said, his voice turning serious. “He’s a combination of the three of us. Regulus wins every fight he gets into, thank to Sirius, so don’t try that. He’ll also find a way to insult every aspect of you if you start chirping with him, so just don’t.”
“That part was because of dear Remus over here,” Sirius said, nudging him.
“Just be careful, and if you see any signs of weakness, go after them. We got this,” James said, followed by a chorus of agreeing bangs against the stalls.
There were five minutes left in the third, and Sirius had managed to put away a goal, tying it at 1-1. James knew he had to think of something, some way to get the puck away from Regulus, but they were truly mirrors. Whatever James was about to do, Regulus thought the same way and blocked it. He needed to figure something out, and preferably quickly.
After a while of basically just playing keep away, he came up with an idea. Regulus knew what James was going to do every time, so all he needed to do was to get the puck to someone who hadn’t spent years playing with Regulus. He needed his defense to get the puck as close to the net as possible, maybe even shoot it, but he knew that wasn’t their strong point.
He skated over to Springs, his left D, to tell him the plan. He agreed to it, albeit hesitantly. He did as he was told to do though, he caught the puck cleanly on his tape before skating between Regulus and his right wing, Rosier. Springs always had a bit of a unique skating style, that is, a huge fucking mess, but it worked in his favor, as he successfully got past their forward line. He immediately passed the puck to Remus who let it bounce off his tape to land on James’ stick at the perfect angle for him to just slap it in. However, James sensed something was wrong as soon as it left his tape.
The ground was swept out from under him and he heard a loud crack, followed by the sound of the goal horn. They had won the game.
Everything started to fade in and out after that. He could feel that the crack was his helmet breaking as his head hit the ground, but he ignored that. He was too distracted by the lack of air he was getting. He could feel pain radiating from his left side, making him struggle for breath.
He heard the medics rush over to him, and he heard them ask what his name was, how old was he, all the typical questions. He tried his absolute hardest to answer them, but it was almost as if he swallowed a bottle of clue. He knew the answers. His name was James Potter. He was 20 years old, and he was playing at his home arena. But no matter how hard he tried, the words wouldn’t leave the pocket in his throat they had found themselves in.
Every time he managed to take a breath, he felt a knife in his lungs, making him avoid breathing. This, of course, freaked the medics out even more, from what he could hear. His eyes were covered in glue as well.
Eventually he let the darkness completely ebb over, and he completely lost sense of what was happening, allowing his brain to take a well deserved break.
Notes:
i hope you guys enjoyed!!
i know this is moving really quickly but trust me, there's a vision
Chapter 3: chapter three
Notes:
hey squad...
so listen, i know it's been like pushing four months since i updated and i am so super sorry!! So much has happened, I moved three times, lived in a hotel, graduated highschool, lost some friends, lost a family member, and started college!
maybe i'll be consistent with updates, maybe i won't, but this fic will get finished eventually, but i cannot make any promises in regard to the time frame for it!
i have up to nine chapters written, i just need to revise them, but after that it'll definitely be some time because nothing past that is written.
i appreciate the patience and if any of you are actually going to continue reading this i really do appreciate you guys and you'll like it, i promise.
Chapter Text
“When we made that agreement last week, I didn’t think you’d hold me to it that soon,” Lily said, amusement coating her voice, poorly disguising her concern.
“Shut up,” James mumbled, trying but failing to unglue his eyes. “What happened?”
“Mulciber, the asshole, fucking threw you into the boards and shattered your damn helmet. I don’t know how he wasn’t put into the box immediately. Can you tell me your name and age please?”
“My name is James Fleamont Potter, I am 20 years old. I’m a center for the Lions’ hockey team, and I have pain behind my eyes when I try to open them, as well as intense radiating pain along my left side, probably my ribs. Anything else you need to know?” he asked, his eyes still closed, his face now scrunched up in pain from his talking. This wasn’t the first time he’d had to have one of his hits checked, and it probably wouldn’t be the last, so he had just made it easier on everyone to memorize the questions, as it saved the medics’ time, especially when nothing was ever really wrong. Well, except this time it would seem.
“What’s the date today?” She asked, laughing slightly as she moved to turn the lights down, hoping that would help with his head.
“I didn’t know the date before I got on the ice, though I love the faith you have in me, Evans.”
“Try to open your eyes now,” she requested. He listened, and was actually able to unglue them. Though it meant nothing as when he opened them he felt his stomach lurch and his head pound, so he immediately closed them again. “James–”
“Are we allowed to come in now?” Remus asked, his head peeking in the door. Once she nodded, he rushed in, Sirius immediately behind him, closing the door and sitting down in the two chairs set up next to the bed. “How’re you feeling?”
“Why aren’t his eyes open? And why does he have that bandage on his chest? What’s wrong with him–”
“Sirius Black, if you ask one more damn question, you’re getting kicked out of the room and forced to wait in the waiting room out there,” she threatened, making him shut up almost immediately. She hadn’t even told James the answer to any of that. “Understand?” He nodded, and mimed zipping his lips. “James, I’m assuming you want them in here for what I’m about to say?”
“Yeah, there’s a good chance I won’t remember all of it.”
“You have a grade three concussion, as you were unconscious for a total of two minutes and 43 seconds. You cannot play hockey for 4 weeks, at a minimum, and even after that–”
“I have to take it slow. My temperature needs to be monitored as well as my sleeping habits, my memory quality, and my speech,” he finished for her. “Anything else?”
“Due to your history of concussions, you may have a longer recovery time, it all depends on your healing. Now, as for the bandage around your chest, you fractured your seventh and eighth ribs, which ends up adding about an extra month or two to your overall recovery. All in all, if everything goes extremely well, with no hiccups, and you heal exactly how you’re supposed to, you should be back on the ice in games by March, probably April at the latest. I’m so sorry,” she explained, her heart breaking when she saw the looks on the boys’ faces. She knew they were all adults, but at that moment they all looked like lost children.
“Fuck,” James muttered, covering his face once again.
“That’s in time for the playoffs though,” Remus pointed out. “We should be grateful for that bit.”
“That’s true,” Sirius said, nodding his agreement.
“I’m going to have to meet with my advisor to talk about moving the rest of my midterms, and accommodations for the start of classes after the break,” James said, groaning and then subsequently wincing at the noise.
“Well, Professor McGonagall is already fully aware of all of this, as she’s the mentor for the program that I’m interning at, hence why I’m the person checking you out right now and not–”
“Rita Skeeter,” both Remus and Sirius said, annoyance clear as day in their voices.
“You all really don’t like her, do you?” Lily asked, eyeing the IV before pushing pain meds and electrolytes into James’ IV, along with a sedative, so he could get some rest while being properly monitored. “James, you’re about to get sleepy, so you can get some rest. It’s just a sedative, so don’t try to fight it, just let it do its job. You need rest but this way we can properly monitor you. First I am going to have to ask you to take out your contacts, just for safety reasons.”
“Yeah, of course,” he mumbled, already feeling the sedative.
“I got you James,” Sirius said, moving to the sink to wash his hands. “You just relax and I’ll do your contacts.” He’d done this many times before, especially recently. When James overworks himself, he does it to a point of complete exhaustion, so he can’t take them out himself, so Sirius made it a point to learn how to take them out for him. Remus can do it too if necessary, but his hands typically shake too much to do it regularly.
“Let’s let him rest for a bit, yeah?” Remus suggested, breathing a sigh of relief when Sirius nodded. “James, we’ll be back once you’ve gotten some sleep, sounds good to you?”
“Sounds great,” he replied, his voice fading as he started to nod off.
Sirius had been concerned about James' habits for a while now, overloading himself with classes, pushing himself to the brink of exhaustion with practice and studying, and he knew it was only going to get worse now that he'll be done with the so-called "easy" classes in his major. He had a habit of not realizing how close he is to burning out until it's too late and he can't get out of bed for a week, unless it's to go to practice so he doesn't let the team down. It's concerning.
And now with this injury, god knows how it’ll progress.
He was shaken out of his thoughts when Remus elbowed him. He was about to give him a dirty look before he looked up and saw his little brother, in front of him, for the first time in two years.
"Regulus? Nice to see you again," Remus said, the ever so kind and put together one in these situations. Sirius on the other hand, was biting his tongue, due to the look Remus had shot him.
"You too Remus," he allowed, nodding his head. "How's Potter?"
"Why do you want to know?" Sirius bit out, not intending to be mean, just a bit strained. Him and his brother haven’t exactly been on the best terms, having not seen each other in two years and all.
"Sirius," Remus chided, almost like it was a warning.
"Am I not allowed to ask about the boy who basically trained me for 6 years?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. He had grown since they had left, he was now standing taller than Sirius by a good few inches, and only a couple shorter than Remus. He'd filled out in the years as well, gaining muscle in his arms and chest but losing fat in his face, now a mess of sharp angles that somehow worked together. Sirius had to admit, he was sort of proud of the guy he turned out to be. Not that he would ever dare to vocalize it.
"He has a concussion and a couple broken ribs. He's out for 2-3 months," Remus said.
"Fucking Mulciber," Regulus muttered under his breath, shaking his head. At Remus' raised eyebrow, he explained. "He has some anger issues that he takes out on the other team all the time. Fortunately, at least for us, they've always been clean hits, just a little harder than necessary sometimes."
"No way in hell was that hit against James clean," Sirius argued. "His helmet was fucking shattered and he’s in the hospital!"
"Maybe it wasn't entirely legal," he admitted, shrugging. "But it wasn't illegal enough to cause concern in the league."
"They need to suspend him, otherwise he's going to injure someone worse than how hurt James is," Remus said. "Or at least put him in anger management or therapy or something. I had to do it sixth year, and I never even hurt anyone except myself, why not him?"
"Scotland's different Remus," Regulus said, rolling his eyes. "America doesn't give two shits about the players, they just want entertainment."
Remus wanted to say something in response, but couldn’t entirely argue so he just shrugged as if to admit that Regulus was right.
“Why are you even here Regulus?” Sirius asked, his voice tired. That game was exhausting, his best friend and brother was in the hospital with a concussion and broken ribs, and all he wanted to do was go home and go to bed. He didn’t have the patience for this.
“I wanted to check on Potter,” he said, his voice implying that that fact should have been obvious. “Just because you guys stopped speaking to me when you came here doesn’t mean that I hate you guys. Or at least not them. You, though?” he asked, tilting his head as if to consider it. “I might hate you a little.”
“Regulus, neither of us reached out to one another,” Remus argued. “It's no one’s fault, we were all busy, it was our first year here and your last year at Hogwarts, we all had shit to do.”
“Fair enough for you guys,” he allowed. “Regardless, my brother should’ve at least reached out once. After all, as he makes a point to mention, he’s my older brother after all.”
“Can we have this conversation another time?” Sirius asked. “I would love to delve into everyone’s problems with each other, especially with the two of us, but we all just played a tiring game. If you want to physically see James you can go in the room, if you want to talk to him, you’re going to have to wait until he wakes up, he’s under a sedative right now.”
“Remus, can you text me once he’s awake? My number’s the same,” he said, waiting for him to nod before leaving.