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“Are you sure there’s no way to get him out of schedules today?” Minho asks Chan on the phone, gently running his fingers through Han’s hair. He’d fallen asleep again immediately after the last seizure and all Minho wanted was to let him stay in bed all day and sleep off the flair up.
“I just got back from our manager’s office. He said Han can’t miss another day this week.”
“Give me a minute and I’ll be down there to talk with him myself…”
“Min,” Chan cut him off sternly. Minho knew he needed to slow down. It wasn’t that they had anything that Han couldn’t miss today, or that he’d missed many days at all this week. It was the sheer fact that one of their new managers was a jerk. “If you talk to him, you’ll get us all fired. Han’s going to come with you to the company, and we’ll just let him sleep there. We only have dance rehearsals, and we have recordings scheduled later but it’s not for the parts he needs to direct.”
“I just wish there was something more we could do.”
There was a moment of silence. Chan also wished there was something he could do to make it so Han could stay home and take care of his health like he needed to, but their new manager wasn’t letting anything slide lately. “I have a meeting with JYP tomorrow morning, but I couldn’t get it for any sooner.”
Han had only left early from work one day that week, yet the manager had made him feel like shit about it since then. He’d had a longer seizure earlier in the week, not a part of the current flair up that had started last night. Despite Han’s insistence to stay at work that day and finish the dance rehearsal, Chan sent him back with Felix. Felix already knew every little detail of that dance by heart, and it was obvious his back was killing him, so Han and Felix spent the rest of the day snuggled up in Felix’s apartment playing video games.
It wasn’t just this one time either. Their manager had been making comments about Han’s health and threatening him for missing days when his epilepsy got bad since he had become their new manager a few weeks ago. To think about it, the extra stress was probably just making the seizures worse. Han hadn’t said anything about it the first few times it had happened but eventually he broke down to Minho who then stormed into their manager’s office. Nothing came from it though and JYP had been busy on tour, so Chan hadn’t been able to get a meeting with him. They’d had some not so great managers before, but the last time they had neglected his health this much was a lot earlier in their careers.
He remembered being a trainee and having to explain his condition time after time to ignorant dance instructors and staff. Chan was one of the first people he met at the company who genuinely put the effort into accommodating him but also treated him like any other person. He was forever grateful to Chan for giving him a chance.
“Okay,” Minho whispered as Han started to stir in his sleep. “I’ll see you soon.”
…
When they arrived at the company, Minho and Han went straight to the dance practice room they had reserved. Chan and Jeongin were already there, and moments after Han and Minho had put their things down, Changbin and Hyunjin walked in with arms full of coffees.
Han piped up at the sight of the coffees, reaching up from where he was nestled in Minho’s arms.
“Morning to you too Hannie,” Hyunjin laughed, handing him an iced Americano.
Han was basically sitting on Minho’s lap as Minho ran his fingers through Han’s hair. He’d realized he hadn’t bothered to brush his hair this morning. Han had basically rolled out of bed and put on the clothes Minho had picked out for him. He didn’t feel like doing anything except sleeping but had no choice in the matter. He could tell he was having absence seizures but couldn’t tell how long they were – just that he was losing bits of time.
Chan also came over and graciously took a coffee, pulling a beanie over his messy hair. “You guys sleep at all?” Changbin asked to Chan, Minho, and Han, who all looked exhausted. “I know we got back late but damn, you guys look… well there’s no nice way to put it, you all look rough.”
“Sure, sure,” Chan said, obviously not really hearing what Changbin had said, and going to start up his laptop, plugging it into the speakers.
Hyunjin laughed, “I don’t think ‘sure’ is an actual answer to that question hyung.” Nonetheless, Chan waved him off, taking a long drink of his coffee.
“How are you doing Ji?” Changbin whispered to Han. Minho had gotten up to start stretching and reviewing the choreography they would be working on today, and Changbin took the open spot next to Han on the couch.
Han gave a light laugh. “That obvious?”
“No, but I’ve known you for a pretty long time… Plus, yesterday didn’t seem like a one off.” Han had left early the night before after having a seizure in Chan’s studio – well, maybe ‘early’ is the wrong word to use because it was one in the morning, but that wasn’t particularly out of the ordinary for 3racha. All of their sleep schedules had been royally screwed up for years. Minho had come to take Han home since he was still at the company perfecting choreography, while Chan and Changbin stayed to finish the track they had been working on.
“Yeah, I had another one last night. Smaller than the one in the studio, but I hate when they start when I’m asleep,” Han looked down at his hands, playing with the edges of his sweatshirt sleeves to keep him grounded. “It’s definitely a flare up. I should probably let the others know.”
Changbin nodded, squeezing his shoulder just as Felix and Seungmin came in. “Before anyone says anything, we are not late. You all are just absurdly early, like always.” Seungmin announced, Felix yawning at his side, cradling a coffee in his arms like it was a puppy.
“Wasn’t going to say anything,” Jeongin called, laughing from his place on the floor. He was sprawled out playing some game on his phone and Han wondered how early Chan had dragged him here.
Han had joined Minho on the floor to stretch, Han admiring Minho’s soft hair from having just showered and his lack of makeup. Han loved living with Minho, as he got to see this side of him more often – the comfortable, soft side. Minho didn’t open up to people easily and Han accepted him for that. The other members always joke that Han and Minho are the only ones that can really understand each other, that they were soulmates from the start. And in a way it was true. Pre-debut Han was a stupid teenager, consumed by his own anxiety, angry at the world, and Minho was older but starting a completely new life for himself – a life he didn’t know was truly possible until he met the rest of Stray Kids, until he met Han.
There was a knock at the door, causing everyone to look up. “That’s weird,” Felix said, “we have this room all day right?”
Minho nodded. “Yeah, I booked it yesterday,” he said going to open the door. Danceracha was planning on staying after practice to come up with some choreo ideas for a song 3racha had been working on.
“Probably just Hyui coming to say hi, I told him we’d be here all day. I ran into him and a few other of the NEXZ guys this morning,” Jeongin said. Han smiled lightly, NEXZ were like his little brothers.
To everyone’s surprise, their manager, a cameraman, and a few staff were at the door. “Good morning,” Chan greeted them, attempting to not sound annoyed. He just had to make it until his meeting with JYP, and then the manager would hopefully be out the door. Their manager barged into the practice room without explanation as the cameraman started setting up.
“What’s this?” Chan asked. “We weren’t aware of any filming going on today. We have the whole day blocked out for getting the album ready. This studio’s booked all day.”
Minho made his way over to Han, who was the only one who hadn’t stood up to greet their manager and the staff, now with his head between his knees, arms limp by his side. He was having a seizure, and no one had noticed with the commotion. Minho slowly placed a hand on Han’s shoulder. “Han?” Minho asked, not sure if he was with them or not. “Jisung?”
Han hummed in response, feeling disoriented.
“Absence?”
Han slowly looked up, and his features shifted from confused to embarrassed when he saw the number of people now in the room. Tears pricked at his eyes. Minho scooted to sit in front of him, trying to distract him. “Hey, you okay?”
He nodded slowly, feeling like shit, but he couldn’t say that in front of the manager and staff. “Drop attack,” he whispered. “Just… taking longer to readjust.” He was lucky that he had fell forward when it had happened, his knees catching his chest instead of hitting his head on the floor.
Their manager was still staring at Han, not taking the hint. “He just had a seizure. Can you give him a minute?” Minho said, pure annoyance in his voice. Minho took Han’s hands in his, tracing little circles into his skin, trying to keep him calm and grounded.
“Yes, well, we’ve run out of SKZ code episodes to post, and the next content we have planned doesn’t go up for a few weeks. So we need a buffer,” their manager says, ignoring Minho.
“Everyone’s been focused on the concert. There hasn’t been time to film episodes,” Hyunjin spoke up. “So what if there isn’t a SKZ code for a few weeks? We’ve been filming talkers at concerts, so isn’t there those to put up?”
“They take longer to edit then you would think,” he cut in, obviously pissed. “Anyways, we don’t have time for this. We’re going to film your practice today and then you’ll drive to a house to film an ‘evening with Stray Kids’ type of episode. Karaoke, cooking, games, a sleepover of sorts. Stay loves those.” His phone rang in the middle of his explanation. “I’ll be back,” he said, going out into the hallway. The cameraman also excused himself, saying something about needing to get something from the office.
“I can’t do that,” Han said frantically once all of the staff had left to get the rest of equipment to set up to film. “I can’t be surrounded by cameras right now when I’ll probably have who knows how many seizures today. I’m in the middle of a flare up and can feel how many absences I’m having, let alone the fact I just had a drop attack. Those usually happen for me when a flare up is about to get bad.” He was on the verge of an anxiety attack and Hyunjin and taken the younger members out of the room to give Han space.
The only people left in the practice room were Han, Minho, Chan, and Changbin. “Look at me,” Minho said. Han slipped into an absence though, staring off into nowhere for a few seconds, likely caused by him getting worked up. Chan had taken to pacing, but sat down abruptly when Changbin placed a hand on his shoulder and he realized he was probably just stressing Han out more. When Han came back to, Minho continued, “Breathe.” He took Han’s hands to his own chest, trying to get him to match his breathing.
“Okay. You ready to talk?” Minho asked after a minute. Han hummed a yes. “We have two choices, okay?”
Han nodded, knowing all too well what those choices were. “You can do the filming, and we’ll make sure the cameras get shut off when you feel one coming on. We’ll keep you safe and they’ll probably try to make you do whatever they have planned at the house, but at least you’ll be with us. Or you can go to the hospital, and they can’t make you film. It’s your decision. If you want to go to the hospital, I’ll drive you there right now.” Both of the options sucked, but they weren’t going to let Han stay at the dorms and skip filming. Even if they did, they wouldn’t let one of the members stay back with him, and he couldn’t be alone during a flare up with the risk of having major seizures being this high.
“I can’t go to the hospital,” Han whispered. “I can’t be around that many people who are sick. The last time I went because a seizure went too long I was sick for a week after because my immune system was so down. I can’t do that,” he shook his head.
“Okay,” Minho said, taking Han into a hug. “We’ve got you.”
…
Their manager came back and finished explaining the logistics of the episode, then left them to practice. Well, left them to a practice cut much shorter than they had planned. Plus, they couldn’t rehearse anything for their new album with the camera on. This left them to run numbers for the concert over and over, perfecting each movement.
After another drop attack, this time in the middle of a dance, the staff said they’d gotten the footage they needed and left them to finish up practice on their own. Luckily Hyunjin had caught him, but Han’s body was obviously giving in. Han decided to think of it as a blessing because he could now curl up on the practice room’s couch to take a quick nap.
…
“Han, it’s time to go.” Han woke to Felix lightly rubbing his shoulder. He hummed, nuzzling into Felix’s hand. “I know, you can sleep in the car, okay?”
Felix helped Han up while Minho collected Han’s stuff. He rubbed his eyes, trying to wake up, not really able to tell if he was on the verge of falling asleep or just in and out of absences, seizure activity still lingering in his brain.
When they got to the car, Han again fell back to sleep. His head was rested on Minho’s thighs. Chan was driving with Jeongin in the passenger seat. “He asleep?” Chan asked.
“Yeah.” Minho had one hand on Han’s hip and another gently running through his hair.
“I’m worried about him. This is the second time pretty recently that he’s had a flare up like this, right?” Jeongin said, glancing back at Han. Chan gave his shoulder a light squeeze. The maknae had always had a difficult time watching Han’s seizures. Even when Jeongin and Han were roommates a while ago, Jeongin would often end up switching rooms with Minho for the nights when Han had a seizure.
Han never thought of Jeongin any less for it. Han had never really seen a seizure, but for the ones he was conscious for and what others have recalled to him, he wouldn’t want to watch one either. Han counted himself lucky that he wasn’t aware during most of his seizures. There were aways the few though that caught him off guard where he could feel everything, hear everything, just had no control. Those typically only came when he was really out of it, near the middle or end of a bad flare up he’d have one or so like that. They always terrified him.
“We’ve all been really stressed both mentally and physically recently with the tour, and that impacts him a lot differently than it does us. He just needs a few days,” Chan replied when Minho didn’t – too focused on watching Han’s chest rise and fall. Chan’s response didn’t seem to ease Jeongin’s nerves, but he nodded anyway.
“I wouldn’t say forcing him to film is really giving him a few days. And we go right back on tour in a week.” Jeongin said, voice wavering between concerned and frustrated.
Chan’s lips pressed into a thin line. “I know. The best thing we can do though is be there for him.”
“I want to be at that meeting with JYP when we get back. I’m so fucking tired of people not showing him basic human dignity,” Minho said after a few minutes.
“I already assumed you would be coming to the meeting.” After a moment of silence he continued. “And I know what you’re saying. You have every right to be frustrated. Han has every right to be frustrated. And even if it isn’t ideal, at least since he’s with us we can keep him safe.”
The ride home was quick and free of traffic. Being in dorms of two was a blessing when it came to bathrooms. Minho couldn’t even start to fathom how they managed with one bathroom for the eight of them at a point in time. It was truly a mystery.
Minho let Han shower first, starting to pack their bathroom stuff, throwing toothbrushes and lotion and Han’s meds into a bag. “They could’ve at least gave us more than a few hours warning so we could have time to pack,” Han said from the shower, “It’s so stupid, but then again, they’ve done worse.”
“I know,” Minho said, zipping up the bag of his and Han’s bathroom stuff.
“Could you hand me a towel?”
Minho got a fluffy one that Han liked from the cabinet, handing it to him. Han abruptly grabbed his arm as if trying to steady himself. “Sorry, feel like I might pass out.”
“Okay, okay, let’s sit down. Don’t apologize, we’ve talked about this.” Minho guided Han out of the shower to the bathroom tile. “Seizure?” Minho asked. Sometimes a hot shower could cause him to faint, but hot showers also triggered seizures.
“Mm yeah, yeah I think so,” Han said, pulling Minho down to the floor with him. Minho got another towel and put it under his head, having him roll gently to the side, just in time for Han to tense up. His eyes closed slightly but Minho could see they were rolled back. His arms pulled to his chest and back and neck arched. “You’re having a seizure, it’s just me here. You’re safe,” Minho said, not knowing if Han could hear him or not. “You’re gonna be okay, I’m here.”
Minho grabbed his phone from the sink and started a timer, continuing to talk to Han. He breathed a sigh of relief when Han’s muscles relaxed. At least it didn’t turn into a full tonic clonic. Han groaned and tried sitting up, but Minho put a stern hand on his shoulder, “Give yourself a minute. You had a seizure after you got out of the shower, just under a minute.” Waking up from them was hard because Han never gave himself time to readjust, trying to get up before he fully came back to.
They stayed like that for a little while, Minho whispering gently to Han. A few minutes later, Minho helped Han sit up, finish drying off, and get dressed.
“What time do we have to leave?” Han asked, his voice soft. They had made their way to Han’s bedroom so he could pack, Minho supporting most of Han’s weight as he set him on the bed.
Minho went through Han’s drawers and closet, handing clothes to Han so he could fold them and put them in the suitcase that lay open on his bed.
“We have to be back at the company at 6:00, so in like an hour.”
Han nodded, putting the last of the folded clothes into the small suitcase. “Min,” his voice lowered.
“What is it jagi?” Minho asked as Han sat beside him. “There’s not going to be a room in that house without a camera.” Minho’s expressions saddened. He knew what Han meant by that.
Han knows they’ll cut any footage of his seizures, but he still would have no privacy. There were people in the company who would have to go through the footage, finding seizures to cut and even absences that are noticeable enough. It was invasive and Han always had hated the thought of it.
Minho took Han in his arms, knowing the only way to comfort him was to simply be by his side.
…
By some miracle, they all made it to the company mostly in time. Minho and Han pulled up a few minutes late just out of spite, and Chan must have had the same idea, arriving with I.N ten minutes late.
“Traffic,” he said, giving the annoyed manager a shrug.
Felix had started explaining a new show he had started watching to Han and decided to sit in the back to watch it with him. “Passenger princesses ready to go?” Minho asked, taking the driver’s seat, looking back at Felix and Han who already had one air pod in each, watching Felix’s phone.
Minho laughed, “Guess it’s just you and me, Jeongin.”
When they had gotten to the company, they were each handed a microphone to clip to their shirts, and the cars were set up with cameras in the front and back. Minho was hoping everyone would get some sleep on the hour ride up though.
As expected, Han fell asleep almost immediately. “Chan’s calling,” Jeongin said, putting him on speaker. “Hey hyung, what’s up?”
“My car is going to stop to get food at a drive through. You guys want to join?” They had been given so little time to pack and get back to the company that none of them had eaten.
“Can we get McDonalds!?” Felix called from the back seat. They heard Chan ask his car if McDonalds was fine, in which they all seemed to agree.
“Yeah, that sounds good, I’ll send you the address.”
“Okay, see you soon hyung.” Jeongin hung up and put the new directions in the maps for Minho.
McDonalds was only a few minutes away so before they knew it they were pulling in behind Chan’s car. Minho ordered a burger and fries for a still asleep Han. He woke up though when the car stopped at the window to pay. “We stopped for food,” Felix filled Han in.
“Mm okay,” Han said, looking determined to stay awake as Minho handed out food. “Morning sleepyhead,” Minho said, giving Han his fries and burger.
“Morning,” Han laughed.
Han tried to keep a conversation with Felix, as Jeongin and Minho were deep in their own conversation in the front seats. He had been slowly eating his fries but could feel himself missing parts of the conversation. He noticed that at one point Felix started rambling about League of Legends, so he simply nodded every so often to try to appear as if he was listening, going in and out of absence seizures.
At one point, Han came back to and realized that Felix had taken the food containers off Han’s lap, and Felix’s hand was now on Han’s thigh, rubbing his knee lightly. He looked around – a little startled from the shift in his surroundings. He no longer remembered what Felix was talking about before. “Try to get some more sleep Hannie,” Felix whispered.
Han nodded, pulling out his phone with shaky hands. “I’m not fully here, am I?” He texted Felix, mindful of the cameras. He knew they’d cut the conversation, but there was always the possibility that something would slip by.
“You keep having absences. I didn’t want you choking on the food, so I moved it,” Felix texted back.
Felix realizes the brief panic in Han’s features. He desperately didn’t want all of the footage to be unusable. There was a voice in the back of his mind saying that if the footage was unusable it would at least get back at their manager, but he knew his other members were also working hard to make this episode, so he wouldn’t do that to them on Stay.
“Don’t worry, they’re not that noticeable. Just try to get some rest, we’ll be there in half an hour,” Felix quickly texted.
…
Han woke up with the lingering feeling he was going to have another seizure. Flare ups were like a ticking time bomb, and for him the frequency and length of the seizures only got worse as they went on. Saying how many he’d already had today, he expected the flare up would only last another day or two. He would love to curl up in bed and sleep through it, but he rarely had that luxury – with constant schedules and demanding managers. Usually, the other boys would do their best to let Han take time off and be comfortable when his epilepsy acted up, but there was only so much anyone could do when they were told they had to film.
Minho got Han’s bag for him and pulled him aside behind the car where there weren’t any cameras. They both turned their mics off as the rest headed inside to explore. “How are you doing?”
“As good as can be expected.”
Minho gave him a look that said, ‘don’t lie to me.’
“Not great but I’ll live. To be honest I barely remember the car ride I was so in and out of absences. I think I did get some sleep though.”
Minho nodded. “Okay, just make sure you’re always with someone. If the absences get to be too much, come get me and we can find somewhere for you to sleep.”
Han took Minho in a brief hug, wishing they could stay like that forever. “We should go in before they come find us,” Han whispered. “I heard there’s a karaoke machine,” he laughed, guiding Minho inside.
The house was giant inside. For it being a last-minute filming, the company sure had spent a good amount of money on it. Han immediately went downstairs to where he heard Changbin screaming about a karaoke machine. Han and Changbin sang a few songs, and eventually Seungmin came over to show off. He even challenged Changbin to sing Love Poem by IU.
“Hyung, you have too much pride,” Han laughed when Changbin said he could no doubt sing that song.
“Shh, just let him try,” Seungmin said, as Hyunjin came over to witness the chaos. And chaos it was – because well, Changbin definitely tried to sing the song Seungmin suggested. Key word: tried.
The song ended with half the member dying laughing on the floor. “Well, I sang the whole thing, didn’t I?” Changbin said.
“If that’s what you call singing,” Jeongin jumped in.
“Be glad you’re the youngest,” Changbin said, tackling a screaming Jeongin into a hug.
When the laughter had died down, the staff and camera men had the members all gather upstairs. “We’re going to do a random dance play game to decide who cooks. First two out get to cook for the evening.”
Danceracha – Minho, Hyunjin, and Felix, all cheered. “Well, looks like we’re cooking,” Seungmin wrapped his arm around Han’s shoulder.
“Ay, why not you and Jeongin?”
Seungmin laughed, “Because hyung, your memory is like a squirrel. Or a quokka, do they have memories like a squirrel?”
“Jokes on you, I watched a video yesterday saying that squirrels actually have good memory. That saying’s a myth,” Han retorted.
“We’ll see,” Hyunjin chimed in.
The staff moved some of the sofas out of the room to make room for all eight of them to dance. Han didn’t see this going well. For as much as they all joked, Han really did have the worst track record when it came to remembering dances. He’d even forgotten lyrics that he’d written before.
“Okay, first two people out have to cook. There’s a grill outside, so someone gets to make barbecue.”
The first few rounds were relatively easy – all recent songs like Walkin on Water, Chk Chk Boom, and JJAM. It got a lot more difficult when they played Double Knot though and Han almost messed up on one of the steps. Surprisingly, Chan messed up on Easy.
“Ha, not so easyyy,” Changbin teased.
“Yeah, yeah,” Chan said giving him a playful slap on the shoulder, a hint of a smile on his lips. He gave Han a quick wink, shrugging towards the grill. Of course Chan would get out on purpose to get the chance to grill.
Next thing Han knew, he was hearing a snippet of Levanter, and then the music immediately stopped. “Looks like we have our second chef,” Jeongin laughed. He was standing behind Han and probably hadn’t even noticed that Han had had an absence. Han assumed it had just looked like he’d not known the choreo and hence just stood there.
“You okay?” Minho whispered to Han.
“Just an absence. I should probably sit though, I feel like one’s coming on,” Han whispered, grabbing onto Minho’s arm, in and out of consciousness.
“Okay, come on.”
“Hold up, what’s this? All of this just to get out of cooking?” Their manager asked annoyed. Minho shot him a murderous glance and was about to explode when Han squeezed his arm.
“I mean, it was his choice to come, so why can’t he participate like everyone else?” Their manager continued as Minho rushed Han upstairs to one of the bedrooms for more privacy.
“Because he’s about to have a seizure and you’re too worried about the video to realize that Han has been struggling to stay standing this whole day. And you forced him to be here. If he wasn’t here, you would have threatened to fire him. So yeah, he’s going to take a break from filming for a bit, because he thinks he’s going to have a seizure. None of this was his choice. So, we’re going to take a break to prioritize our member’s health – something you obviously don’t know how to do,” Chan said.
Chan had this way with words after being in the industry for long enough that shut everyone in the room up… and somehow, he did so without cursing the man out at all – something that was sure to have just added flame to the fire.
“We’ll continue this later,” their manager said dumbfounded. “Everyone take twenty.”
…
“Min, I don’t want to go… I’m scared, I’ve known this was coming all day, but I’m scared.” Han rambled, trying to cling to consciousness.
“It’s okay to be scared,” Minho had an arm wrapped around Han’s shoulder, his other hand rubbing circles into Han’s thigh. “You’re safe. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Minho noticed Han’s eyes were closed halfway, like he had stopped in the middle of blinking. His arms started to tense up towards his chest and Minho gently laid him down on his side on the bed. He started the timer on his phone and prayed Han couldn’t feel anything – wouldn’t remember this. But he always talked to him just in case.
Han’s back arched slightly, and his legs kicked against the bed. “You’re safe Hannie, I’m here with you. It will be over soon.” Tears pricked at Minho’s eyes. It never got easier to watch. Han looked so tense and uncomfortable and in pain.
The timer read a minute and thirty seconds, and Han’s convulsions didn’t seem to be slowing. Chan came upstairs and placed a hand on Minho’s shoulder. “You okay?”
“Shouldn’t you be asking about Han?” Minho whispered.
“I know you would call for me if Han wasn’t okay. You wouldn’t do that for yourself.”
Chan was right. As much as Minho tried to hide it, it was a lot. Most of the time Han could take care of himself, but in moments like these where he completely relied on someone, that someone was usually Minho. Minho wouldn’t want it any other way. He loved Han with all of his being. But it was a lot to have someone’s life rest on your shoulder’s every so often. Chan took Minho into a back hug, and Minho didn’t resist it like he usually did, letting himself melt into his only hyung in the group. “I’ve got you,” Chan whispered.
Han’s seizure started slowing and eventually stopped just before the four-minute mark. He let out a cough and Chan put a towel under his head to catch the vomit and gunk and came up. “There you go, big cough. Get it all up,” Chan encouraged, throwing the towel in a trash bag when Han was done.
“You just had a seizure. It was just under four minutes,” Minho talked softly to Han, running his fingers gently through Han’s hair. “You did so good. Chan is also here. Just take your time.”
Han slowly opened his eyes, squinting, and Chan closed the curtains so his eyes could better adjust. He hummed, trying to talk but not yet able to. “You’re okay, just take your time, that was a big one.”
They sat there like that for a little while, letting Han readjust to his surroundings. “Min,” Han whispered.
“Hi jagiya. How are you doing?”
Han hummed as if thinking about his answer, and a little smile pulled at the corner of his lips. He was out of it to say the least. “Mm, tired.”
“Yeah, I bet,” Minho laughed.
Han pulled his legs towards his chest, realizing he had wet himself during the seizure, looking slightly embarrassed. “You want to take a shower?” Minho asked gently.
Han nodded, reaching out and burying his face in Minho’s chest. Minho helped him sit up and got fresh clothes out of his bag – Han’s sweatpants and one of Minho’s soft sweaters that Han always stole anyways.
He helped Han to the bathroom, making sure the water was warm. “Can you help?” Han whispered.
“Of course.”
Minho helped Han get out of his clothes, and took his own off as well. He helped Han into the shower and gently wiped his face, and scrubbed the vomit from his hair, using the detachable shower head to rinse out the soap. When he turned off the water, he helped him dry off. Han smiled when he saw the sweater Minho had picked out for him.
When they got back to the bedroom, Chan had left a glass of water for Han and a little note. ‘Hope you’re doing okay. You don’t need to come back down tonight, take your time. Love you.’
Han sat on the bed drying his hair while Minho pulled up the anime they had been watching on his laptop. After around half an hour of laying together, cuddled up and warm, Han said, “I think I want to go back down.”
“Mm, okay.”
“Really, no ‘we should stay in bed,’” Han said playfully.
“I mean now that you mention it,” Minho wrapped his arms around Han’s shoulders, trapping him there.
“Min I’m hungry, I think I threw up everything in my stomach,” Han laughed, whining slightly.
“Fine, fine,” Minho laughed, pulling on a sweatshirt. The two made their way downstairs, Han seeming to have gained back a bit of strength, but still lightly clinging to Minho’s sweater sleeve.
The cameramen didn’t say anything. Chan must have really put them back in their place. The interesting thing was Minho didn’t see their manager anywhere.
Chan noticed the confusion and whispered to Minho and Han, “I called JYP and he finally answered. We’ll be getting a new manager next week.”
Han hugged Chan, “Thank you hyung, for everything.”
“You never should have had to deal with any of that in the first place.”
All of the members gathered in the living room on the couches with food Chan had made – Minho, Han, and Felix on one couch, Felix loving how cuddly Jisung was feeling. Hyunjin was trying to steal food from Changbin’s plate with little luck, while Seungmin and Jeongin kept playing old videos of their performances.
“Jeongin you were such a baby in this,” Chan teased from the grill, enjoying watching his members relax while he cooked.
“That was for the Yellow Wood album, I was a baby hyung. I hadn’t even graduated high school,” Jeongin laughed.
“This was the stage where we were waiting to go on and I asked what you were doing tomorrow, and you said you were taking your final exams!” Changbin exclaimed.
Everyone laughed. “It’s a miracle I even passed,” Jeongin said, inhaling more meat.
“That’s for sure,” Hyunjin said.
They fell into a comfortable silence, eating and laughing together. Eventually, the cameramen said they had gotten enough footage and left. They’d be back in the morning, but for now Stray Kids had a moment to themselves – the first moment of peace Han had felt in a while.
Han knew he would finally sleep well tonight, surrounded by the people who love and care for him – the people who were willing to do anything to keep him safe.