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“It’s here,” Ahsoka insists. Her voice trembles ever so slightly, but Kolara doesn’t comment on it. She feels the same way. For weeks now, Anakin has been missing. The reports say that he was killed, but she knows better. They all know better. Anakin wouldn’t die that easily, and Ahsoka can still feel him. So can General Kenobi. Even if he couldn’t authorize an official search, that doesn’t mean they stopped looking.
They would never stop looking.
“Alright,” Kolara breathes, glancing at the teenager next to her. “It’s just us. Be careful, Ahsoka.”
The Togruta gives her a trembling smile. “You too.”
They move in together, creeping into the darkened structure ahead of them. A few clones snuck along, and they’re in the front, causing a diversion to draw out the guards. A part of Kolara isn’t sure if this is real. She’s been so afraid, and she knows that she shouldn’t get her hopes up. This might be nothing more than another failed rescue attempt.
Maybe he is really dead.
The grief hits, sharp and cutting, and she swallows past the scream that wants to escape from her throat and forces down the tears that yearn to follow. One thing at a time, and if Anakin is in here, then he needs her to keep it together.
Ahsoka doesn’t ignite her lightsabers, but she keeps the hilts gripped tightly in her hands as she prowls into the darkness. She can see better than Kolara can in the darkness, and she’s a trained fighter, so she goes in front. Kolara tightens her grip on her blaster as she follows. Outside, there’s a commotion. Shooting, screaming, explosions. Everything that will hopefully keep the area inside devoid of guards or bounty hunters trying to stop them – or kill them.
Or capture them.
The deeper they get, the quieter it becomes, and Kolara hesitates for the first time. Maybe this is a mistake. Or no, not a mistake, but a trap.
Unease prickles down her spine.
“Ahsoka–”
The girl holds up a hand to silence her, and Kolara quiets instantly. “There,” Ahsoka breathes, and Kolara moves to stand at her side.
“What? What do you sense?”
“Down,” Ahsoka realizes, and Kolara follows her gaze. A dim glow comes from something at the end of the hall, a control panel of some sort. It’s just enough that she can make out the uneven edges of the floor – as though it’s a trap door. “C’mon,” Ahsoka hisses, sprinting forward. Kolara follows, breathless with anticipation and dread and excitement, all of it coalescing together in a messy ball in her chest.
A quick splicing job gets the trapdoor open, and the two of them climb down the ladder into the darkness beneath. They have no idea what they’re walking into, but Kolara knows that it’s… something. Something potentially threatening. She doesn’t dare lower her blaster, not even to wipe the sweat from her palms.
“It– it looks like a lab down here,” Ahsoka offers hesitantly, confusion coloring her voice. “I don’t understand…”
“He’s powerful,” Kolara reminds her, turning to check every corner. It’s instinctive, something drilled into her from her time on Carnelion IV and something that Ahsoka and the clones imprinted on her the importance of during their many searches for Anakin. “Anyone could have wanted him for any reason.”
She refuses to dwell on what condition he might be in when they find him. She needs to find him. She needs to hold him and make sure he’s safe and then tell him. He needs to know. She doesn’t want to bring their unborn child into the world – a child that he doesn’t even know about – when she’ll be the only parent left to raise it.
“Alright,” Ahsoka decides finally. “I think we’ll need to split up. There’s too much for us to search through together, and I don’t know how much longer we’ll have. The boys will buy us time, but I don’t know if it will be enough.”
Kolara inhales a trembling breath. “Alright. You go right, and I’ll go left.”
“May the Force be with you,” Ahsoka whispers.
Kolara watches her go and then turns toward her designated half of the underground lab. Everything about the place is giving her the creeps. Nothing is normal here. It’s so quiet, only the distant hum of machinery even letting her know that something down here is functional. It’s only darkness and more darkness, doors and even more doors. Everything is empty. Dusty. Untouched. It’s somehow more terrifying than finding gruesome sentient experimentation or dead bodies would be.
She curses under her breath when she realizes that her hands are trembling from adrenaline. Steady. She needs to be steady. Mistakes can and will kill her. If someone jumps her, she needs to be able to hold out until she can either withdraw or Ahsoka can come in to back her up.
Kolara checks behind every single door, but she finds nothing.
Nothing.
Nothing!
She wants to scream. They’d been so certain that Anakin would be here. It was the best lead they’ve ever gotten.
And then, at the end of the hall, there is a set of double doors. She runs her fingers along them, confirming what she already suspected. Durasteel. Great. No easy way to open them, either, she guesses, as she uncovers a hidden control panel. The screen stares back at her, and she bites back a snarl of frustration. Ahsoka is much better at slicing than she is, but that doesn’t mean she can’t do it. It just means that it’ll probably take longer – and she might trip an alarm in the process.
Kolara glances over her shoulder, but she sees nothing. Just darkness. It would take too long to double back and get Ahsoka – and like the Togruta said, they don’t know how much time they have. What if this is it? What if this is what she’s been searching for all this time?
Hope flares, cradled right alongside the grief and pain and longing she’s felt all these weeks.
Taking a deep breath, she slides her blaster back into its holster and gets to work. The splicing feels as though it takes an eternity, but she manages to get inside without activating any alarms, at least any obvious ones. Who knows what she’s doing to the system. Maybe soundless alarms are going off somewhere else.
The doors slide open with an ominous creek, and Kolara creeps inside.
The first thing that hits her is the scent of blood. It’s strong enough to be nauseating, and she swallows down an instinctive gag. Whether she’s on the right track or not, she’s definitely about to find something in here. Or someone.
Lights flash on overhead automatically, and Kolara nearly fires instinctively, flinching back with a muffled yelp as the light blinds her. Ouch.
Her heart hammers wildly in her chest as she looks around. It’s not quite a lab so much as it is a lab combined with a storage room. Blood is smeared along one of the walls, dried puddles in front of a barred door across the room. Dread seizes her, and she wonders if she really wants to keep going. She’s afraid of what she might find. It could be anything – and it could also be the last thing she wants to find.
What if – what if Anakin is dead?
She swallows hard, her throat dry at the thought. She mourned him once and then refused to accept that he could really be gone forever. She doesn’t know if she has the strength to go through that a second time. It would crush her to learn that her husband is… gone.
Gone before they ever got the chance to have the family they always dreamed of.
But she cannot stop, and she will not stop. Anakin deserves everything, and she will do what she must to bring him home, even if she only brings back his body.
She steps forward, approaching the barred door and tries to find a way to enter. The control panel to the side flashes warningly when she attempts to override the locking mechanism, so she approaches it, trying to make sense of what it says.
Sensory deprivation mode activated. Subject will experience damage if removed abruptly.
Yeah, okay, that doesn’t sound good. It takes her a few minutes to navigate the settings as she tries to set it up to open. Then, all she can do is wait. And wait – and while she waits, she scrolls through the settings. Dark chamber. Sound-proofed. … Lined with cortosis? Kolara frowns. She’s never heard of that before, but as she looks through the information presented, her blood runs cold.
Theorized to dampen a Force user’s connection to the Force.
Oh stars. That’s – that’s Anakin in there, isn’t it.
She paces anxiously, waiting for the deprivation setting to shut down so she can get inside. Her mind runs in circles, around and around as she thinks about what it would be like for Anakin to be trapped in a place like that, no light, no sound, no Force. What will he be like when he comes out?
It’s a question that she can’t even bear to think about, so she resumes her pacing.
The panel beeps to let her know that she can get inside, and she hastily pushes the button to open the door. It slides open painfully slowly, and she moves toward the entrance.
Shock hits her first, followed swiftly by denial. No, no –
Anakin is in there, but she barely recognizes him. His curly hair is matted with blood, and his body –
Kolara takes a step back instinctively when he raises his head. He snarls low in his throat, the sound inhuman. He’s not human anymore, though. Black wings have sprouted from his back, curled defensively against his body. His very not-human body. A dark reptilian tail is curled around his legs. Legs that are half-human and half-animal. Half-reptile? She can’t quite tell. His wings flap, and he bares his teeth, growling when she doesn’t back away.
“Anakin,” she whispers, her voice breaking.
She doesn’t run. She could never run, not from Anakin. No matter what’s been done to him, she is certain that part of him knows her. He’s hurt and scared, but he’s still – he’ll still come back to her. To them.
Kolara holds out a hand as she takes a step closer, lowering the blaster at her side so he doesn’t think she means to hurt him. As she approaches, stepping through the blood and other substances that she doesn’t want to think about, she can make out the collar around his throat. It’s locked in place, a shock collar undoubtedly meant to contain him here. It’s easier to focus on that than on the wounds. They crisscross his skin, as though he was whipped brutally, and through the blood that’s caked around those injuries, she can see muscles – and maybe even bone.
Her heart breaks for him, and she stands there, waiting while he decides whether she can be trusted.
Finally, he lurches forward, eyes shadowed and wary but now filled with recognition. “Kolara,” he croaks, voice raspy and broken as though he hasn’t spoken for weeks. He probably hasn’t. Or maybe, she thinks bitterly, it’s from screaming.
She doesn’t know when he was locked in here, but some of the injuries seem recent, fresh blood oozing from the wounds and dripping down his skin.
“I’m here,” she replies, tears blurring her gaze as she stares at her husband’s broken body. “I’m here.”
He stumbles toward her, and she lets him take her hand in his. His right arm is a mess, prosthetic gone, a half-formed reptile limb in it’s place. “Sorry,” he breathes out, squeezing her hand. “Sorry, sorry–”
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” Kolara answers, and now, she does start crying. She can’t help it, can’t stop it. “You’re safe now, Ani.”
He lets her remove the collar from around his throat, wincing when she has to wrench it off. It rubs against raw skin, and she wonders how long he spent trying to rip the thing off with his bare hands before he gave up.
“I know– s’not what you thought, huh?”
Her laugh is a half sob. “I don’t care. We’re getting you out of here, Anakin.”
She helps him wrap his arm around her shoulders as he staggers from the cage. Or whatever it is. “Slow,” she tells him when he tries to rush. “Can’t have you falling.”
His wings ruffle a bit, stretching as he tests them, and he grunts a wordless acknowledgement of her statement. It’s slow going when he can’t even stand on his own, but they still make it out of the room and back into the hallway. Anakin falters then, his breath coming quicker, and Kolara immediately realizes what’s bothering him.
“Hey, focus on me,” she says, squeezing him a bit. “I’m right here, and we’re going to get out of here.”
“Y-yeah,” he croaks shakily. “Just– can you put some pressure on my side?”
She falters in the face of the totally unexpected question. “Uh… yeah, sure. Why? What happened?” She lets him guide her hand further down, and she nearly yanks it away again when she feels the sticky warmth of blood coating her fingers. “What– what happened?” she blurts out, horrified. “Not just this, but–”
Anakin takes another step, a pained sound escaping, but he doesn’t stop. “Tried to escape,” he answers. “Nearly made it. They stabbed me. Drugged knife. Took me down. The– whipping was a punishment.”
Kolara turns her head to take him in better, studying the lash marks across his chest. One of them trails up the side of his neck, slicing over his cheek and stopping at the bridge of his nose. He’s lucky it didn’t take out his eye. She expects that one will leave another scar to match with the one by his right eye.
“We can– we can talk about it later,” she tells him, voice trembling.
They make it back to the hallway where she and Ahsoka split when she feels Anakin tense next to her. A growl rumbles from his throat, and she tenses, peering around the corner. She freezes when she sees the too-familiar figure slumped unconscious on the floor, a masked figure standing over here.
“I wondered when you’d show,” the bounty hunter says, voice modulated beyond recognition. “Take one more step, and the Jedi dies.”
Kolara sucks in a breath, looking desperately at Anakin. If they do anything, the bounty hunter will shoot Ahsoka. However he got the jump on her, she is now defenseless.
“Surrender,” he orders.
Anakin shifts, and Kolara can feel him tensing. She expects him to lash out with the Force; that would be the logical thing to do. She does not expect him to start… changing. There’s the sickening crack of bones breaking, bones shifting, and Kolara stumbles away from him, watching with wide-eyed horror as his entire body transforms into something… other.
Reptilian yet not.
He’s – he’s a dragon.
A blood-covered, wounded dragon, yet a dragon all the same.
His howl makes the walls shake, and she flinches when he lunges forward. She hears an aborted scream, a blaster shot, and then… silence.
Kolara looks around the corner to see Anakin standing over Ahsoka’s body. He’s nudging her with his muzzle, trying to wake her up. The man is dead. Blowing out a breath of relief, Kolara runs forward, dropping to her knees at Ahsoka’s side and shaking her. “Hey, Ahsoka, wake up,” she urges. “We gotta get out of here.”
The Togruta moans, shifting slightly as her eyes flutter open. “What– happened?” she mutters, slurred and disoriented. Maybe she was drugged. Probably she was, and they need to get her out of here before reinforcements arrive.
“You’re okay,” Kolara answers, squeezing her shoulder. “Can you move?”
She mutters something incoherent, eyes shutting again, no matter how much she seems to be trying to stay conscious. No use. They’ll have to carry her. Kolara hefts the Togruta up into her arms, looking toward Anakin as he shoves the two lightsaber hilts toward her.
“I got them,” she says, bending to pick them up and attaching them to Ahsoka’s belt. “Now what?”
He jerks his head, a ‘get on my back’ gesture.
“What?” She scowls. “No way. You’re hurt!”
Anakin snarls, demanding and urgent, blue eyes darting toward Ahsoka.
“Ugh, fine,” she concedes. “But please tell me I won’t hurt you worse.”
His head shakes, so she decides to trust him, carefully laying the unconscious Togruta on his back before climbing on behind her. She really, really hopes that he knows what he’s doing as she leans forward, clinging to him as best she can. He flaps his wings, lifting his head as he looks toward the ceiling. A horrible screech of metal being ripped apart fills the air, and Kolara flinches instinctively, holding on to both Ahsoka and Anakin as the ceiling above them is torn apart with an invisible force.
It makes her breath catch in her lungs to see how powerful he is, but she doesn’t have time to get caught up in her awe. He flaps his wings, launching them through the hole and flying straight upward through the roof. There are people below them who try to open fire, and Anakin throws them all side with his mind alone. She doesn’t know, for sure, if they were killed, but she expects they were. Anakin is thorough, and he would kill the people who captured him, especially if they were threatening the lives of his family.
“Over there,” Kolara calls to him, directing him toward where their ship was hidden. She activates Ahsoka’s comm to give the clones the signal to fall back.
They land by the shuttle, and she has never been so relieved to see a starship in her life. At long last, they can finally go home. She slides off of Anakin’s back, helping Ahsoka down after. The Togruta is still somewhat out of it, stumbling around a bit as she tries to find her footing.
“Are you– stuck like that?” Kolara asks, looking at her husband. “Or–?”
He growls, an almost pained noise as his body twists in front of her eyes. He changes, and it’s a horrifying thing to watch as he collapses back into the half-human, half-dragon form of earlier. He’s pale, too pale, and he looks at them, eyes focusing for only a moment before his legs buckle, and he crumples onto the ground.
Kolara cries his name, letting go of Ahsoka to catch Anakin. She doesn’t get there fast enough, and they end up on the ground together. He’s still covered with blood, but the worst of the injuries seem to have – strangely enough – closed over. Perhaps the shifting had something to do with it.
“C’mon,” she urges, trying to rouse him. “We’ve gotta get you on board.”
He doesn’t move, though, and Ahsoka is still unstable from being drugged, so that means they need to wait for the clones to come. It isn’t long before they run up, firing over their shoulders at their pursuers. The captain, Rex, takes only a cursory glance at Anakin’s body before he orders his men to get him on board.
And then, they’re off. Kolara is so, so relieved to feel the engine humming under her feet as they rise into the air and leave this cursed place far behind. It’s reassuring to know that she’s safe, that they’re safe. She doesn’t manage to fully relax until they’ve jumped to hyperspace, and the ship’s vibrations become a comforting background noise as she heads back to find Anakin. The medic is fussing over him, and Ahsoka is sitting in a chair not far away.
The girl’s face is tight with worry, and Kolara reaches out instinctively to squeeze her shoulder. “How is he?”
Ahsoka’s shoulders slump, but she still leans into the touch. “It’s not good, but it could be worse,” she answers. “We don’t know what they did, or how they– turned him into that. Kix says it’s a miracle he’s still alive. He shouldn’t be. He’s lost a lot of blood, and he nearly went into shock from changing his form, but he should wake up shortly. Kix says he needs to be cleaned up so he can disinfect the wounds and see what needs to be treated.”
Kolara nods at the words, swallowing. Looking at Ahsoka’s face, she can see the exhaustion there. The pained resignation. This isn’t anything new for her. “You do this a lot?” she asks gently. “Sit next to him?”
Ahsoka’s expression tightens. “Yeah.” Her voice is barely audible. “He does it for me. This– this is the worst I’ve ever seen him, but it never gets easier, you know?” She chews on her lower lip, and Kolara’s hand tightens. “Once, he got shot. Went through his thigh, but he didn’t tell anyone until it started bleeding enough that he couldn’t hide it.” Her breathing hitches, eyes a little distant as she relives the memory. “I had to put pressure on it until we could get him back to the medbay. It– it never gets easier.”
Kolara’s heart breaks a little for her, for all of them. It’s not fair to any of them to fight in a war. They’re so young. Ahsoka most of all, but Anakin and the clones, too. She bends over to wrap Ahsoka in a tight hug. “Why don’t you get some rest? I’ll stay with Anakin.”
Ahsoka hugs her back, and in her grip, Kolara can feel the gratitude. “Sure,” she murmurs. “Wake me if something happens?”
“Of course,” Kolara promises.
She watches as Ahsoka stands, still wobbling a bit as she heads to one of the cabins. Once she’s gone, Kolara sits down in the chair and resolves to wait as long as she needs to. Kix sets up a monitor and leaves them be.
Kolara doesn’t know how long she sits by his side, but eventually, she pulls her chair up next to him and takes his left hand in hers. She hums softly, a lullaby from Carnelion IV that she no longer remembers the words to. It’s haunting yet beautiful. She pauses when she feels Anakin stir.
“Your voice is beautiful,” he mutters, still mostly out of it.
Her cheeks heat in a flush that she doesn’t even bother to hide, tears threatening to choke her. “I’m glad you’re awake,” she whispers. “I was so, so worried. You’ve been gone for weeks.”
He grunts wordlessly, turning his head to look at her and squeezing her fingers. “I missed you.”
“Missed you, too, Ani,” she answers.
“There’s– blood on you,” he points out. His voice is still hoarse – whether from screaming or disuse she doesn’t know. He looks a little better now. His face has more color, and he looks more alert. The wounds have closed over enough that even though they’ll scar badly, she can no longer see the muscles or bone beneath his skin.
“It’s yours,” she replies, reaching out to cup his cheek. He presses against her palm, and they stare at each other for a long moment. “Kix said to get you cleaned up. If you’re up to it. You should probably rest a little more.”
“No, no, I–” he hesitates, swallowing. “I’d like to clean up. Kix can look me over. Bandage or… whatever.” His eyes dart away from hers, and he stares up at the ceiling. “I’m not the same. You know that. I can’t– I can’t pretend otherwise.” His dark wings rustle, as though displaying his uneasiness.
“Hey, I don’t care,” Kolara says fiercely. “You’re still my husband, okay? We’ll figure it out.” There will be time later for her to tell him about the child she’s carrying, but she knows that Anakin isn’t yet ready to hear it. He’s… a mess. Physically, mentally, and emotionally. He needs stability. He needs time to heal.
“Thank you,” Anakin whispers. He almost looks like he might cry, but he doesn’t. Kolara helps him sit up. He’s not in as much pain anymore – partially because the worst of the wounds have closed over and partially because of the pain medication that he’s on. He’s able to walk better than he was before, but he still leans on her as they go to the ‘fresher.
Kix had mentioned the possibility of wiping him down if nothing else, but he felt that a proper shower would do better at cleaning him off and reducing the risk of infection. It’s hard to do much for him until they can get him back to a proper medbay where they can scan his body and try to understand what was done to him. Or unless Anakin tells them but Kolara suspects that even if he knows, he won’t want to talk about it.
She helps him step into the water, undressing as she follows him in. He can’t stand on his own, and he has to lean against the wall as she washes him. She’s as gentle as she can be, but it still cuts her open to see him so beaten down, so… vulnerable. She tries not to look down at how red the water is as it washes down the drain.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t find you sooner,” she whispers.
For a moment, she doesn’t think that he hears her. His right arm twitches, the limb still a strangely distorted mix of human and dragon. Black scales start around the place where his stump used to be, and the limb extends further, almost to where his wrist once was before it ends. It’s horrifying. It doesn’t make sense, either, and she tries not to dwell on it.
“It’s not your fault,” Anakin replies.
They stare at each other before his left hand comes up to rest on her shoulder. He pulls her closer, and she leans against him, just a bit, just enough to feel that he’s really, truly here. She doesn’t cry. It’s a near thing, but she refuses to let the tears fall, not now. Anakin is already injured enough. She doesn’t need to ask for his comfort when he is the one who needs to be comforted more than anyone else.
“You’re safe,” she breathes, hands settling on his arms. His wings shift a bit, curling closer to them both. “You’re safe, Anakin. And I’m taking you home.”