Chapter Text
What do you do when a demon offers you your greatest desires? Do you hold fast and true, denying the demon and your darkest desires? Do you stand bravely against the source of evil and try to vanquish its dark putrid soul from existence? Do you..
"PLEASE HAVE MERCY! I DON'T WANT TO BE TURNED INTO SOME FREAK OF NATURE, OR DIE!" Or do you fall onto your hands and knees and start crying like a baby...
If your answer is the last one than i'm sorry to say you're Robbie Valentino local Gravity Falls emo loser, and you've currently found yourself in some crazy white void with nothing to be seen outside yourself and a floating one eyed triangle with a top hat, that had turned your home town into the main event of the weird apocalypse.
Said floating triangle was currently face palming with a irritated expression seen in it's one eye, "This...this is what you're sinking to Bill.." The triangle grumbled out with a sigh dragging his hand down his face, "Hey..hey stitched heart!" Bill called but Robbie was currently now rocking back and forth while sucking his thumb, "urg...if you'd please stop sucking your thumb and PAY ATTENTION!"
He bellowed out demonically his yellow form turning red, his voice deepening, and his form growing larger all of which caused Robbie to pale and squeak, "please don't hurt me!" He squeaked out in a trembling voice, "Urg i'm not here to hurt you!"
Bill snapped his form turning back to normal as he scowled with a glared, "At least...not anymore.." he grumbled out causing Robbie to blink to send him a curious looks, "Here's the deal Stitched Heart my big party Weirdmageddon celebration has been cut short.."
The demon gave a sigh as it floated circling Robbie, "And what's worse looks like i'm getting kaput with it.." The demon scowled, "I had a ace in a hole in the event of a emergency that would save my skin...but it seems that a certain someone was trying to pull a fucking fast one on me!"
Bill gave a low growl before taking a deep breath, "Which means accepting oblivion..but not before using every bit of my power and what I stole from that big baby to get the last laugh!" He declared whirling toward Robbie who was now sitting up on his knees but looking confused, "Uhh...what?"
Prompting a another face palm, "desperate times Bill...remember he's better than Gideon..." He muttered out before sighing as he floated over, "alright look lets cut to the chase i'm dying but i'm going to use every bit of my power to make sure the Pines don't get to enjoy their victory.."
Bill declared, "And you're going to help me!" Before than pointing toward Robbie who's eyes widen,"All it takes is making a little deal, and my revenge will be set, and you will be my instrument to enact it!" The twisted demon exclaimed out rubbing his hands together while Robbie just looked incredulous before getting a angry expression.
"What?! Why the hell would I help you after the hell you put me and everyone else through! You turned me to fucking stone dude!" Robbie declared angrily as he stood up glaring at him, "Hell if anything i'm glad you're dying! And there's not a single fucking thing you can say that would.."
"you'll get to fuck ice bag and other female meat sacks.." Bill said bluntly while snapping his fingers with the forms of his ex Wendy Corduroy and his current girlfriend Tambry DiCicco appearing...only wearing nothing but lingerie and making out, "Uh..I...you.." Robbie was suddenly tongue tied his raised finger frozen as he stared with a dropped jaw at the sight before him, "maybe...it wouldn't hurt...to hear you out.."
Robbie said reaching out toward the girls who gave him teasing smirks as the kiss broke...only to vanish in a flash a moment before he could touch them, "thought you'd feel that way~"
Bill said smugly turning Robbies attention back to him.."now than.."
The triangle hand lit up in a blue flame, "Lets make a deal!"
At that Robbie gave the hand a slight fearful look as he asked with a gulp, "W-what...exactly do you want with me?" He asked as Bill stared at him, "Like said do to events I rather not get into i'm cashing in my poker chip for good, but not before playing one last ace in the hole.."
Bills eye narrowed, "It might mean being unable to save my own glorious three side self....but if it means making the Pines suffer I suppose I can compensate by offering you a chance of the life time.." Bill said as Robbie blinked ,"And this chance will get me girls?"
Robbie question as Bill sighed, "Yes it will get you girls.." The demon said with a annoyed tone, "NOW PAY ATTENTION!" He snapped causing Robbie to flinch as he stood up at attention, "Using what power I have left along with the juice I stole from Time Baby i've managed to freeze time just at the moment of my demise.."
Bill gave a low growl of hatred, "And if you accept my deal I will be using it not only to contact you.." The one eye gleam with dark ambition, 'but set the clock on the Pine family especially Pine Tree...demise~"
He said as Dipper Pines appeared before the two smiling that dumb smile that Robbie wanted to punch right off the smug twerps face,"What's the plan?" Robbie asked scowling at Dipper fake or not as he clench his hands into fists, "using my juice along with the natural weirdness of Gravity Falls i'll be rewinding time and you'll find yourself right at the start of summer."
Bill explained before giving a sigh, "Sadly as I existed outside of your dumb reality this rewind won't work for me which has resulted in me needing to select the perfect instrument of revenge...someone who won't mind selling out in exchange for his base desires." He added with a smug under tone as Robbie gave a slight glare at the insult, "Just take my hand and agree to do whatever you must to destroy the Pines family, and i'll explain exactly what you need to do to achieve both of our desires~"
At that the demon offered a flaming hand and Robbie looked warily at it a part of him for a moment doubting the offer...after all why should he trust his dude? He sounded desperate so maybe if he turned him down he couldn't hurt him, maybe he should just do the right thing and..."Or you can go back to your normal life and hope that love potion that got your current girl mixed with you doesn't wear off.."
Bill added off handedly as a screen appeared beside them showing the scene at the dinner where Robbie and Tambry first got together...only Mabel Pines drugging their fries!?
"What the heck?!" Robbie called out with a worried explanation as Bill gave him a smug explanation about a certain Love God, his love potions, and Mabel desperate desire to see Robbie match up with someone leaving the teen with mixed emotions, "and did I mention this deal will ensure you not only get the girl but keep them~" Bill added sing song with Robbie biting his lip his expression becoming torn with grappling indecision before groaning out, "Fine! It's a deal!"
He snapped caving in to his fear of Tambry leaving him like Wendy did, but also his desire for the girls and his desire to make Dipper Pines suffer, and as he shook the demons hands...everything changed as knowledge filled his mind, "Oh and i'll be giving your body a little boast just consider it a bonus~"
Bill added off handedly, "Wait what?" But Robbie couldn't question him as the next thing he knew was a bright flash of light..
(Later or rather earlier that summer)
"Urg...my head...what did I do last night." Groaned out the form of Robbie as he sat up rubbing a aching migraine though as he opened his eyes they glowed with what some would recognize as Bill Ciphers demoniac energy only without the part of being possessed by Bill.
And Robbie...not only froze in shock as soon as he saw himself in his dresser mirror...his dresser mirror!? He quickly realized he wasn't in that white void anymore but back in his room...and as he hurriedly got out of his bed, "Ouch!" Well fell out of the bed onto his face he wasted no time going to his window and throwing it open to see....nothing...no crazy tear in the sky...no freaky flying eye balls turning people into stone....no floating pyramid hovering over the town....no Weirdmageddon....nothing but normal regular Gravity Falls.
Or rather....not so normal...Robbie realized with a grimace holding his hand to head as bits of knowledge and information about his town secret or not so secret weird magic side flowed into his mind...it all flashed through his mind in a dazed blur but somehow he knew all this information by heart.
And as he walked over to the mirror over his dresser glowing eyes greeted him for several moments before he concentrated and they returned to his normal brown eyes, "Woah.." He breathed out running his hand through his hair, "This...this is crazy.." He said holding a hand, "I guess that crazy triangle actually did it.."
He breathed thinking back to the hand covered in blue flames...and at that moment he suddenly found his own right hand covered in blue flames, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!" Which naturally caused him to freak out and wave it around, "Put it out! Put it out! Put it..wait.." He froze for a moment...realizing something very important, "i'm...not in pain.."
he muttered wide eyed staring at his hand surrounded in blue fire but he didn't feel anything outside a warm prickling sensation, "i'm...i'm not really human anymore am I." Robbie added with a frown though strangely felt calm at the idea...and the more he thought about it...he felt different than before.
Stronger...more confidant...and not as restrained by fear or even morals...hell, as he glanced back at the mirror and gave a flex it looked like he had more lean muscle to his body and...he looked down pulled his boxers back, "Oh yeah...very nice~" Robbie gave a smug grin...he wasn't exactly small before but now..."oh i'm going to make Wendy scream like a bitch!"
Robbie said with a snarl his eyes once again flashing yellow...thinking back to the girl of his desires...the girl who humiliated him and choose that twerp over him! Oh this time would be different this time he'd back that bitch worship his cock and praise him for beating the crap out of Pines!
Whether it was his newfound power bringing out his darker side, the side effects of making a deal with a crazy demon, or something that triangle had done as insurance, Robbie didn't know or care. But he knew that was willing to cross any line to get what he wanted this summer and no one especially Dipper Pines was going to stop him!
knock
knock
"Robbie, everything good in there sweetie? I thought I heard a yell, and you should be careful wouldn't want to wake the dead~" Called and joked the ever chipper tone of his mother, "i'm fine mom, better than ever actually!" Robbie called out his eyes glowing Cipher yellow again, "I actually thought i'd go out and enjoy this nice summer day..."
He said giving a smirk to his reflection, "maybe even pick up a book to read~" He thought his mind flashing to a certain location in the forest and a certain Journal number 3...if this was back at the beginning of summer...back when the Pines had first arrived...that meant Dipper hadn't found the journal yet...which meant nothing was stopping Robbie from taking for himself.
He might not need it with all the knowledge floating around his mind from Bill Cipher...but he knew finding that journal was the start of it all for that Pines twerp....without he'd have nothing....he'd just be a pathetic little brat who'd have to take Robbies abuse and thank him for it~
He thought as more knowledge and memories from Bill flashed through his mind centered around the Pines family and all the misadventures they had related to supernatural through out the summer, and could have again. Knowledge he could certainly work with and turn into his favor.
"Besides...I got to keep my side of the deal." Robbie gave a chuckle if getting everything he desire meant ruining Dipper Pines life than as far as he was concerned that was just a bonus~
"Not to mention.." Robbie scowled as one particular scene flashed through his mind that of a memory wiping cult...a memory wiping cult that had wiped his own memories, "teach everyone not just Pines that the days of Robbie Valentino being everyone's chump is over.." He held up a blue flamed fist, "i'm the new sheriff in town, and i'm going to make sure everyone gives me the respect i'm due."
The teenager turned demoniac figure said with a dark expression that promised nothing but pain and suffering in one Dipper Pines future.
"But better move fast...need to get that book before him." Robbie muttered still confidant he could just take the book if Pines already had it, but perhaps it was better to play it a bit smarter before claiming everything due to him, "and while i'm at it...should check in on the Mystery Shack dump...see if the Pines have even shown up yet.."
After all no use in plotting vengeance against that twerp Dipper if the loser wasn't even in town yet with his...sister. Suddenly Robbie gave a conflicted looking scowl as his mind turned to the loser sister Mabel while getting dressed.
He was annoyed with her at first finding her preppy attitude too much like his parents...only to find her growing on him a bit. Which was surprising in itself considering how up the wall his parents could drive him and how even he found them creepy sometimes, but Mabel felt more genuine in her happiness than them, and sure as hell less unnerving about it.
And the apparent truth behind Tambry and his relationship was a shocker that hurt...but while part of him was upset at the girl drugging him like that....another part of him honestly appreciated what she did...and he was honestly trying to figure out what to do with her.
As much as he was embracing this new lease on life, the power that came with it, and the chance it gave him...a part of his soul could still feel the binding of the original deal with Cipher. The demon was gone and never coming back...but the deal was still in play and going back on it likely wouldn't end well.
Which meant he had to ruin the Pines family...he didn't care what happen to the old coot, his nerd twin could stay lost in the multiverse for all Robbie cared, and Dipper oh he'd be making that losers life hell, but Mabel....less restraint on morals aside he found himself not crazy about the idea of her suffering like her brother, "Urg...i'll figure it out later."
Robbie grunted as he stomped out of his room, after all he had actual power now, he could probably figure out to handle Mabel that will let him fulfill the deal and still go easy on the brat.
After all he couldn't throw everything away for the sake of one brat....right?
(Later)
Okay that Ford geeks third journal was right where the memories and knowledge in his head said it would be, the Pine Twins were also already at the Mystery Shack just as expected.
That loser Dipper lacking that pine tree hat was reading a book and looking as pathetic as expect. What wasn't expected was two facts...one the Pine Twins weren't Twins anymore! And Mabel Pines...instead of being a pre-teen was looking 16 going on 17 like him and rocking one hell of a killer figure with one of the largest racks he'd ever seen!
And as Robbie looked at her smiling and laughing as she pet a goat....he suddenly got a dark smirk and twisted gleam of desire in his eyes. He didn't know what the hell was going on, or why Mabel was suddenly the big sister. Best guess he had was something Cipher did or some unintended side effect of this whole restart.
And he'd probably have to look around and be careful of any other unexpected changes that didn't match the Cipher memories or knowledge. But despite all this he could only feel twisted amusement and arousal because it looks like figuring out what to do about Mabel wouldn't be so hard after all, and it would make Dipper Pines suffering all the sweeter, "Heh get ready for a summer romance of your life shooting star.."
Robbie said his eyes glowing a evil demoniac yellow, "Because your life is never going to be the same again~"