Not fit for the world below

by CoarseSaltCookie

Summary:

It was a strategy. A plan to bleed that traitor dry.

No one under Imu’s command even got close to Dragon. It was a mistake not to take the man seriously, and now Mu had to deal with it themselves.

Leaving Mariejois and stepping foot in the dirty world below was disgusting, that day Imu really wished they sent more Holy knights instead of dealing with things themselves.

Surprisingly, getting into the Revolutionary Army was easier than Mu thought. Just go to a kingdom, wait and pretend to suffer until the Revolutionaries came and helped. Offering the lowly people to join their cause.

Truly disgusting.

or

Luffy is an unexpected baby but no one regrets it.

Chapter 1: Plan failed succesfully

It was a strategy. A plan to bleed that traitor dry.

 

 

No one under Imu’s command even got close to Dragon. It was a mistake not to take the man seriously, and now Mu had to deal with it themselves.

 

Leaving Mariejois and stepping foot in the dirty world below was disgusting, that day Imu really wished they sent more Holy knights instead of dealing with things themselves.

 

Surprisingly, getting into the Revolutionary Army was easier than Mu thought. Just go to a kingdom, wait and pretend to suffer until the Revolutionaries came and helped. Offering the lowly people to join their cause.

 

Truly disgusting .

 

If there was something Mu had, it was time. Working under a D really hurt Imu’s pride, but in exchange they got really close to Dragon. Close enough to form what lowly mortals called a “relationship”.

 

Mu didn’t get what it was with the touches or what they called “kisses”, but they were close enough to hear every time Dragon planned something, so it was worth the trouble.

 

And then, Dragon proposed having children. To this day, Mu still didn’t know what compelled them to say yes, but in less than a week, he had this… parasite growing inside them.

 

They felt disgusted. They, a GOD, bearing the child of a traitor. It took them a while to get used to it. Mu will have to quickly kill Dragon and get rid of the parasite.

---

And quickly turned into months. Don’t get Imu wrong, it was difficult to find a proper situation to kill Dragon. But the child parasite… They did try, and each time they couldn’t. Just couldn’t.

 

It was in one of those lonely days, those where Mu was alone, watching the sun disappear in the ocean like Joyboy that perhaps Mu understood why they couldn’t kill the parasite.

 

It was because the thing was kicking inside them, reminding Mu that they were creating life.

 

And Mu didn’t feel like going against it.

 

That night, they reflexed and changed their plans. They would kill Dragon, return to Mariejois and let someone deal with Mu’s the child.

 

That was all.

 

No strings attached

---

Imu was back to Mariejois. They tried killing Dragon, but it failed miserably.

 

Now they were back, with the elders pestering them about their baby Mu’s parasite. But they didn’t have to offer an explanation. They never did.

 

“Bring me more meat.”

 

They commanded through the snail. During their time in Mariejois, they have found more things. Like the painful cravings for flesh and meat.

 

You really like it… don’t you…?

 

They thought, eating the food served. Mu swore they weren’t getting attached to their baby the thing. They were.

 

Thus, they did didn’t have a worry about the whole “pregnancy”

 

Would it look like Dragon…?

 

---

The pain of the war from 800 years ago was nothing to the agony Mu was feeling the last 16 hours. If that's what it meant to create life, then Mu didn’t understand how humanity hadn’t gone extinct. Oh, but the relief when it was over.

 

When they had the human in their hand it was so tiny, and yet, so loud with what they called cries. And yet, when the ruler of all things held him he stopped crying and started laughing loudly. A sound that even for a demon it was so angelical.

 

And Mu knew. They couldn’t give them away. It was born to be given love. Mu’s love. To sit in their throne and be given anything.

 

Oh, this little baby, born between a demon and a descendant of the sun.

 

He wasn’t fit for the world below.

Chapter 2: 5 minutes, that's all he needs.

A few months after the very little addition to Mariejois, the whole hierarchy changed drastically. If no one believed anyone could be above the gorosei, little Luffy would prove them wrong.

 

So, new rules were added. Slaves couldn’t even walk the same path as the infant. If one of those filthy slaves from below even glanced at the kid, the knights would be in charge of making sure to not leave a trace that they once existed.

 

Servants had it easier. After all, they were in charge of feeding him and changing him. But unless summoned, they were prohibited to interact with the infant.

 

Lastly, only the most trusted Holy Knights were in charge of their protection. They made it very clear that if something made the infant shed a tear, they themselves would make the person in charge suffer the most painful death. The Figarland family was the one in charge of most expeditions their bundle of joy took outside the flower room. After all, they trusted that family enough to let the new addition, the lost man, take care of Luffy a few days here and there.

 

It was 5 months, 6 days and 17 hours after Luffy was born that, while they both were enjoying the peaceful moments, the baby tugged Imu’s clothes, gaining their attention.

 

“M-ma…. Mo…. M-mu. Mu! Muuuuu!”

 

The kid said with the brightest smile as if he had accomplished the most difficult task and he expected praise.

 

Praises he got, and more. Oh! Imu was so happy! They were the first word! Few times they felt an emotion as strong as joy, and here they were. Contorting their body in the most unnatural way just to give their son the best hug ever.

 

Perhaps it was the ecstasy that made them not pay attention while calling the gorosei to declare officially that day as a Holliday in Mariejois while little Luffy tried rectifying other words.

 

“A-anks!”

 

 

---

 

 

Mu sometimes liked taking photos of the infant. Sometimes it’s a portrait picture, others it’s just a surprise picture, but it always ends in the same way. For context, demons can hide well, very well in fact. But a simple photo was enough to reveal their true identity.

 

Now, Luffy wasn’t a demon entirely. Yet he was always affected by this so-called curse. Not like they minded, they were proud their child showed a part of their Branch. But it was in days like that day, where Luffy was observing the sea so interested and smiling and pointing at the sea beasts that sometimes emerged that Mu really wanted to capture that moment without their son affecting the image.

 

“Mu! Mu!”

 

“Yes, meat pie. I saw”

 

Perhaps they could ask Saturn to modify a snail. But by the time he managed Mu’s walls would probably be filled with pictures.

 

Well, that’s something for another time…

 

(Image for reference if u want 2 see)

 

 

---

 

 

By the time around Luffy's second birthday everything went downhill pretty quickly. Or, as peasants would say it, everything went to hell.

 

“Mu! Hungry!”

 

“Not now, my teeth rotting meatball, I’m preparing something important.”

 

They said as they talked with Mars the possible gift with the todler. They could discuss later the punishment for the Figaland family for that traitor of theirs.

 

“As I’ve said, master Imu, I believe an island is… too much for the young master. I propose a much safer option, such as a giant to entertain him.”

 

“And giving them the opportunity to squish MY child, Mars. Besides, are you implying that just any filthy slave can entertain my kid.”

 

“N-not at all! That was my mistake, master Imu. But…”

 

“Apologies for interrupting, but this is an important matter, their Hollyness”

 

A servant interrupted as they entered the flower room.

 

“Speak”

 

“Revolutionaryies are attacking, master. It seems their objective is to cause as much chaos as possible and free the slaves.”

 

“I’ll deal with it myself”

 

Imu said as they took a step forward.

 

“Master Im-”

 

“Don’t question me, Mars.”

 

They said furiously as they walked towards where the chaos was, hopping to find Dragon to personally dismember and torture him.

 

 

---

 

 

Luffy hated being alone. Even if it was for 5 minutes, he hated it. He wasn't used to not having anyone nearby, showering him with attention. That's probably why, when Mu returned quicker than expected, he didn't cry or yell. He wasn't alone, and that's enough reason not to wonder why their cloak was slightly green.

 

“Mu…?”

 

“No, Lu. Papa.”

 

“Pa…?”

 

Luffy didn’t care why Mu sounded more deeper and masculine. He wasn't alone and that was enough for him to finally take a nap in peace.

 

 

---

 

 

Imu stood in the middle of the massacre. More revolutionaries escaped than they wanted, but none of them saw Mu.

 

As Mu didn’t see Dragon. They groaned, wondering why would Dragon send a bunch of suicidals to their place when one of the Holly knights came, shivering as a pig sent to the slaughter house.

 

And they were, because soon after delivering the news, the only thing left from the Holly knight was their bones.

 

“He WHAT?!”

Notes:

So... um... yea. Here we are.

Do people read that author notes?

Anyways, sorry for nor posting, I was really busy. I would say something like the ao3 curse hit me but it didn't.

It hit my aunt. Because she died.

Don't get me wrong, she's my aunt and I love her. But I didn't feel that connected to her, y'know. I've been busy helping my cousins through the grieve instead.

Anyways, here we are. And I'm bored. So if you have read this far, bookmark this and give it the funniest summary you can think of. It can be anything, related or not related to this.

Sorry for keeping you waiting.

Your friendly writer.

CoarseSaltCookie.

Chapter 3: And he feared him because he liked dogs

It’s been three years since the Revolutionary Army’s attempt on Mariejois, but it was enough to brand Dragon and his followers as the worst and most wanted criminals. Enemies number 1 of the World Government.

 

Three years since Dragon left Luffy in Garp’s care, thus, in Makino’s care. The kid was basically a copy-paste of Garp in most senses, but he was strange in its own, unique way. Like the way he healed. No matter the injury, in less than a day it would be healed and Lu would be filled with energy and ready to break another bone. Or that one strict rule about photos. That no matter what, Luffy mustn't appear in one.

 

Or how much he ate. Surprisingly, he ate more than Garp. And no matter how much the old bastard paid child support, it wasn’t enough to cover Luffy’s needs and the bar at the same time.

 

“Perhaps if I don’t eat for a few days…”

 

The young woman muttered looking at the taxes, sighing and internally cursing the nobles in High Town.

 

“Maki…?”

 

“O-oh! Luffy! You should be asleep…”

 

“I… I’m hungry…”

 

“Oh! Sorry, I can’t cook you anything right now. Maybe tomorrow.”

 

Makino said standing up and smiling at the infant, but the kid wasn’t that dumb. He understood Makino was upset because he ate too much, even if she tried playing it as if nothing happened.

 

Luffy nodded and tried going back to sleep, but the hunger was too much. He stood up when she thought everyone was asleep and sneaked out of the house. The infant walked through the streets absentmindedly before his eyes landed onto something…

 

 

---

 

 

The next day, Makino was serving Woop Slap as the mayor ranted and ranted about some woman complaining about finding her dog’s carcass without some flesh and organs. 

 

“Perhaps it was her ex-husband? I heard they had a great fight. I remember reading about a husband who killed his girlfriend’s dog with a knife.”

 

“Bulshit! I saw the scene! There was blood everywhere! I’m telling you it was an animal of the forest! Or a monster! Just call Garp to deal with the situation!” 

 

“We shouldn't bother Vice-admiral Garp for nothing-”

 

“Maki! I’m back!”

 

The conversation was interrupted by Luffy bursting in the place, completely wet head to toes.

 

“Luffy, did you fall again in the river?”

 

“Um… Yes.”

 

The kid answered, even though his face made that pout when he’s lying. But Makino didn’t care that moment.

 

“I’ll make you breakfast.”

 

“Not much, please. I already ate.”

 

“Really? Who fed you?”

 

“Shishi! Secret!”

 

---

 

 

Garp was on his ship on his way to return to Foosha village to train his idiot grandson and to solve the problem of the animals. It's been six months since Woop Slap started complaining about the loose animal who targeted the pets in the village, especially cats and dogs.

 

He arrived in the village by midnight, so he decided to focus on the loose animal so he could focus on training the brat Dragon gave him.

 

It didn’t take long for the old marine to hear the crunching of bones and meat.

 

“Bingo”

 

He followed the sound so he could beat the animal.

 

Only that the animal was small, and wasn’t an animal, but a human.

 

When he turned, the hairs on the back of his neck stood up. It was mostly covered in shadows, but he could see his bright, red eyes staring at him.

 

“Luffy?”

 

The marine asked, now shocked… No, something he didn’t feel for a long time.

 

Fear

 

“Grampa?”

 

“Jesus Chist… What the fuck are you doing?”

 

“Eating.”

 

“Then ask Makino. And for the love of god get the hell away from the body.”

 

“Maki says we don’t have much money because I eat too much… I don’t want her to be sad.”

 

At the statement, Garp stayed silent for a moment, watching his biological grandson covered in blood of what was one of the pets of someone in the village.

 

“Luffy, do you understand what you are doing is bad?”

 

“Is it?”

 

“Yes, because you are making other people sad.”

 

“Am I?”

 

“Yes”

 

“Sorry.”

 

“Just… We’ll go hunting tomorrow in the forest, you can hunt there and only there. Ok? No animals inside the village. Promise?”

“Promise”

 

“Let’s just not tell anyone”

 

“Ok”

 

Garp sighed, relieved to finally be able to solve the situation. But he had to find the idiot of his son and beat some answers out of him.

Notes:

I'm back baby!

I just couldn't abandon the project knowing you people love it so much! Thanks for the kudos (though i had to explain to my mother what kudos were bc she read my e-mails xd)

Sorry if it was a little bit short T-T

I decided to write luffy as an emotionally intelligent person that doesn't understand the emotions of others and focuses on the people he likes (does that make sense?)

Now that i think about it, if Iva had a coin for each revolutionary who had a kid with a celestial dragon and this kid wanted to be a pirate, they would have two.

I almost forgot! Thanks to that one user who followed the gimik of the funny bookmarks. If you are reading this, you rock.

Thats all.

Brush your teeth

CoarseSalt

Chapter 4: Stomachache

“A-anks!”

 

“Hm? What is it now, Lu- I mean, young master?”

 

“Tory!”

 

The older man looked around the garden, making completely sure he was alone with the infant.

 

“What are the magic words, Luf?”

 

“Pwease!”

 

To this, the man snickered, trying not to laugh his butt off.

 

“Alright, Luffy, how about I tell you that time the Roger Pirates fought with the Whitebeard Pirates for three days?”

 

“Ye!”

 

And thus, the man started explaining how, when he was a kid, the crew landed on a remote island. It didn’t take long to barge into the Whitebeard pirates, whose captain didn’t have a beard, but no one ever dared question it.

 

“shanks…”

 

He explained how his captain fought. Detailing how with the sheer clash of their weapons, people flew here and there. How both crews gave their all, even though his crew was superiorly stronger (he will never admit he was exagerating things to make him seem cooler)

 

“Shanks…!”

 

And he finished the story saying how both crews ended in a truce, exchanging provisions and telling a kid whose face he couldn’t remember that strange rumor that some guy named Teach hadn’t slept for three days. And how they got a new crewmate named Od-

 

“SHANKS!”

 

Shanks woke up from his sleep exhausted, as if he didn’t sleep at all. Ever since he left Mariejois he had these dreams with the child he sometimes had to take care for. Perhaps part of his subconscious was worried that the innocent kid would turn into another of those monsters that called themselves “Gods”

 

“Ugh… Ben… I didn’t even finish the story…”

 

“Captain, the fuck are you talking about?”

 

Ben said as he watched Shanks get out of bed slightly grumpy.

 

“Look, whatever. Ever since you returned from that hellhole, you have been acting strange. You’ve been worrying us, Shanks. That’s why we are going to the east blue on vacation. That’s non-negotiable.”

 

Well, he had to admit he was acting differently from his usual self. But can you really blame him? In his defense, he didn’t realize his stupid curiosity that led him back to his biological family would disappoint him that much. Or that he would realize there was, in fact, a ruler of the world. And that they had a child…

 

Perhaps it was too much information to process. A vacation would clear his mind surely.

 

 

---

If God existed, Shanks thought this was they way of saying “Fuck you”.

 

Because, what were the chances that out of ALL the blues, out of ALL the islands, they landed on the island where a pair of familiar eyes stared into his soul like daggers.

 

“Have we met before?”

 

Shanks stood frozen for a moment before calming down. This was all a coincidence. At least that's what he wanted to believe.

 

“I don't think so, kiddo. But just in case, can you tell me your mom's name?”

 

“I don't have one…”

 

Shanks shouldn’t have, but he sighed relieved. It was all in his imagination.

 

“And why should I tell you? Gramps says all pirates are scum of the earth, horrible people, extortion…something, people that shouldn’t-”

 

“Oh god! Luffy!”

 

A young woman yelled running towards the kid.

 

“Don’t say things like that!”

 

“It’s ok, madame”

 

Shanks could hear Ben say.

 

“Oh! I’m so sorry! Please don’t hurt him!”

 

“It's ok, miss. We’re not the type to hurt innocents because of big moths like his. But my men here are thirsty.”

 

“I run a bar nearby… But you might want to do something with… him”

 

“What do you…? Um… Hongo? Shanks fainted.”

 

---

 

 

Shanks wasn’t sober enough for this. Both him and Luffy (he didn’t want to believe it was THAT same Luffy) were in a staring contest, one analyzing the other. Waiting for the other to do something. Shanks was hoping, praying this isn’t the same kid that Mariejois listened so eagerly to his stories, and Luffy waiting for the other to attack like gramps said.

 

“Luffy. Stop staring at… What was your name again?”

 

“Captain Shanks, and you?”

 

“My name is Makino. I apologize, he’s a little bit grumpy…”

 

“Shanks! Young Master is grumpy”

 

“Fuck you want me to do?!”

 

“Whatever you do whenever he’s crying.”

 

Shamrock said, handing him the infant before turning away to do whatever that fuck always did.

 

“Hey anchor, wanna hear a story?”

---

 

 

They didn’t intend to stay on the island for over a year, but whatever the captain says goes. Besides, the crew weren’t complaining about more days of vacation.

 

(Except Yassop, but the entire crew teased him for it)

 

Now, they were resting on the island after stealing THE gumu-gumu no mi(or the Hito-Hito no mi: Model Nika for shanks). They were drinking as usual and Anchor was crying because his “brave” act of stabbing himself did hurt (if they find out, Shanks is cooked) until a mountain bandit came and started putting on a tough act. Shanks let him “humiliate” him, he didn’t want to cause a problem inside Makino’s bar. And after they left, Luffy yelled at him for not “protecting himself”.

 

That’s how the story went. Except it didn’t.

 

Not long after Shanks explained himself to Luffy, this clutched his stomach and fell to the floor. Crying in pain and gagging as a round, purple fruit rolled through the ground before hitting Ben’s feet.

 

“Luffy… Did you eat this?!”

 

But Luffy couldn’t focus. More worried about clutching his stomach, vomiting and squirming on the floor.

 

“HONGO!”

---

 

 

It’s been a week or so since Luffy’s indigestion and he didn’t get better, high fever, immeasurable pain and delusions. The crew was worried but they couldn’t do anything. That’s when Bonk Punch suggested buying some souvenirs from other islands to at least improve Anchor’s morale.

 

When they arrived, there was the same asshole from before. The crew wasn’t in the best humor that day, so some of them made sure the 8 million berry bounty bandit never caused problems while the rest went to the bar,

 

“Shanks!”

 

Anchor greeted as if the past week was the worst in his life. And the crew partied as crezy (after Hongo checked Luffy and made sure he was ok).

 

Now, he and Luffy were in the port, watching as the moon rised from the ocean afar.

 

“I feel better now that they stopped fighting”

 

“Fighting?”

 

“The voices. They were yelling and making me feel bad. But they stopped. I don’t know what they were saying though.”

 

Shanks wasn’t sober enough for all this.

---

 

 

“I don’t want to join your crew!”

 

“Hm? Why’s that?”

 

“Because I’ll be the pirate king!”

 

Those words stung Shanks more than he wanted to admit, seeing a little bit in Roger in Anchor. Before he knew it, he was giving his hat to Luffy and making a silly promise he knew he would fulfill.

 

And as they were leaving the East Blue, Shanks couldn’t hold it longer and laughed his but off because of the irony.

 

In another story, he would have lost an arm. Freed himself from the abyss mark.

 

But here, Shanks was a damn unfortunate man with both arms and a good reason to beat certain revolutionary’s ass.

Notes:

Boom! I can rest now!

Except I can't because tomorrow I start school and the day after is my birthday.... shit.

Anyways! How are you people?! Reading this? Good boy >:)

Ok... Ok... sorry. My bad.

I'll do something I never wanted... I'll promote something! That's right! It's my SpaceHey profile, Coarse_Salt_Cookie. I plan on posting there doodles since my parents dont really allow social media. I also wanted to try tumblr, but i want to hear your opinion first.

Remember to pack your backpack

Your friendly... something(?) CoarseSalt