Chapter Text
Seungyoon is convinced he’s the only normal one in his group of friends, which at the moment, is a losing argument given the three pairs of eyes that are staring at him as though he’s a green alien who had just walked into the bar and ordered a beer.
“Are you fucking serious?” Jinwoo gapes at him, and Seungyoon thinks he sees a hint of pity in Jinwoo’s impossibly large eyes.
“Come on, guys,” Seungyoon lets out a laugh that sounds uneasy, even to him, and he doesn’t know why he’s suddenly embarrassed when he’s clearly the only sane person on this table. “You can’t possibly want that lifestyle. I mean, think of the diseases.” Seungyoon shudders as snippets of his basic reproductive health classes back in high school flash through his mind, along with a rather nasty image of a purple penis that had him traumatized all throughout junior year.
“That’s what condoms are for,” Taehyun pipes, judgment lacing his tone. “And who’s talking about a lifestyle? It’s just something that happens. We’re not all Seunghoon.”
“That’s right,” Seunghoon leans closer with a sneer. “You’re not all me. You need serious skills in order to go home with anyone you like, which I’ve perfected.” He winks.
Taehyun rolls his eyes, unwilling to taking the bait. They can all talk about Seunghoon being a beast later, but for now Seungyoon’s vanilla sex life is the more important matter at hand. Seungyoon doesn’t even remember how in the world they veered so far off from their original topic, which was whether or not it was okay for Seunghoon to buy a dog and have it live in their shared apartment.
“So, you’ve never done it... out of choice?” Taehyun’s brow is quirked in a way that’s still very disparaging and if Seungyoon hadn’t spent all of freshman year getting to know them, he’d think they’re all just very awful people right now.
“Of course it’s by choice!” Seungyoon defends, taking a swig from his bottle, his throat unbearably dry. No one in their right mind should ever have sex with a complete stranger. One night stands are simply out of the question for Seungyoon, and the fact that all three of his closest college friends think him a lunatic for it clearly means something went wrong with the government’s basic academic curriculum somewhere.
“But you broke up with Jaebum before second semester last year,” Jinwoo supplies casually, tapping his chin. It’s not really something Seungyoon wants to be reminded of given their horrible breakup, but hey, as long as they’re on the roast-seungyoon-until-he-cries roll they why the hell not. “That was eight months ago. So like, how do you have sex?”
Seungyoon would much rather be swallowed by a hole in the ground than have to sit here any longer. All three look at him expectantly.
“I don’t,” Seungyoon shrugs, acting as nonchalant as possible. “But it’s not like I can’t do anything about the urges. I mean, we’ve all masturba-“
“Oh god, that’s tragic,” Seunghoon cuts in with a sympathetic frown. “We need to get you laid. Now.”
“What?” Seungyoon’s eyes are wide. “How did we get to that conclusion?”
“Wait a second,” Taehyun interrupts again. “So you mean to say all those ‘library nights’ you kept going to last year were actual library nights?”
Seungyoon’s jaw drops in horror, looking across his friends’ faces. “What did you all think? That I was hooking up all those times?!”
“Well yeah,” Jinwoo replies, looking almost offended. “I mean, you were kind of a campus hotshot last year, and after your breakup with Jaebum it seemed like everyone wanted you. Well, every gay guy at least.”
In hindsight, Seungyoon does recall several guys he’d regularly bump into at certain spots on campus, and a few who were particularly flirtatious, but at the time Seungyoon was still nursing a broken heart. Plus, he had just made a vow to focus on classes and survive his first year of university instead of wasting any more time on relationships.
“I wasn’t ready, okay?” Seungyoon declares, to which none of them look very sympathetic.
“No, I won’t allow this,” Seunghoon stands up from his seat, downing his beer bottle in one go and urging the rest of them to do the same. There’s a crazed look in his eyes now, only magnified under the dim lights of the bar. Seungyoon could already feel this going so wrong, especially with the look of mischief that are mirrored in Taehyun’s and Jinwoo’s faces.
“It’s simply unacceptable that the last person you had sex with is the jerk who cheated on you,” Seunghoon continues over the music, not making any conscious effort to be subtle, and in effect, several people sitting in adjacent tables turn to look. Seungyoon really hates this.
“I agree,” Taehyun moves to gather his things as well, getting ready to leave. “You may not think you need to get laid, but trust me, you do. At least get it done before the term starts and things get hectic again or you’ll find excuses not to go have fun,” he finishes, dragging Seungyoon by the elbow up from his seat. All Seungyoon wants to do is finish his beer bottle, but it’s too late for that when he’s being shoved outside the door in the hopes he caves into making a very unwise decision.
They practically drag him towards Seunghoon’s car despite his protests, but Seungyoon manages to yank his arm away from Jinwoo’s iron grip before they could push him inside.
“Guys, this is crazy!” Seungyoon yells in a last-ditch effort to get out of this madness. “I’m not going to force myself to sleep with a stranger!”
“Seungyoon,” Taehyun puts a hand on top of Seungyoon’s shoulder, another on his waist – which only means Seungyoon is in for some ‘real’ talk. Seungyoon sighs.
“If you remove the negative connotation you’ve always put on one-night stands and just open your mind to the possibility of it, then this shouldn’t have to be such an ordeal. We’re in college. We’re young. We’re allowed to make stupid mistakes now that we can’t once we have jobs and real responsibilities,” Taehyun explains, looking more and more serious. Seungyoon wonders if Taehyun has ever put half the effort he is right now in convincing Seungyoon to have sex, into any aspect of his life. Seungyoon supposes he should be flattered Taehyun is going to such lengths when he normally doesn’t give a shit about most things.
“It’s just not for me,” Seungyoon responds, albeit unconvincingly, because Taehyun is still looking at Seungyoon like he has no idea what he’s talking about.
“How can you say that without even trying at least once?”
“After all the horror stories you guys have told me about some of your one night stands, I don’t have to experience it for myself.”
“It’s part of the fun,” Seunghoon says, chin propped on a hand over the roof of his car. “The unpredictability of it is what makes it exciting. As long as you’re practicing safe sex and not completely drunk enough you can’t make proper choices, then it shouldn’t be a problem. If it sucks, it’s another funny story to tell over lunch.”
“And if this guy lures you into some crazy bat cave, you can always still walk away. Unless you’re into leather and masks,” Jinwoo adds with a sheepish smile, which Seungyoon hopes doesn’t translate into Jinwoo’s actual preferred sexual activity because the mental image is quite disturbing.
“Ugh this isn’t working,” Taehyun rolls his eyes and grabs both of Seungyoon’s shoulders now. “If you meet Jaebum on campus on Monday with some new man, do you really want to be the Seungyoon who couldn’t even have angry rebound sex after the break up eight months ago? Are you still hung up on him, is that it?”
“Of course not!” Seungyoon retorts. He’s completely over that idiot cheater, thank god. But something about what Taehyun is saying is making him a little fired up inside. Taehyun must have sensed it because he smirks.
“Well then prove it. Have emotionless sex with a guy you barely know and enjoy it.”
Maybe Seungyoon shouldn’t have let Taehyun easily con him into saying yes, because looking through the crowd now, he’s just realized that he hasn’t really dated anyone since Jaebum – and that includes the one year they were in a relationship. He’s scared that he’s completely forgotten how to do this, and he isn’t like Seunghoon, Taehyun, and Jinwoo who are staples in clubs like these for precisely that reason.
He suddenly feels dizzy and swivels in his seat to grab his glass. He’d strayed from his usual light beer and ordered a rum and coke to help loosen the nerves. After taking a sip, he tugs at the side of Jinwoo’s jacket, feeling helpless.
“How exactly do you do this?” Seungyoon asks, starting to feel stuffy. He’s not the type to dislike clubs, in fact, when he and Jaebum had been dating, they often frequented these spots. But being here alone, with hooking up as end goal, is an entirely different story.
“Just relax,” Jinwoo tells him, hips moving slightly to the music. Jinwoo hasn’t stopped smiling since they arrived, looking absolutely in his element. “If you keep acting nervous, everyone’s going to think you’re a virgin and virgins are bad news. They get clingy after sex.”
“All the tables are full,” Taehyun emerges from the throng of partygoers, panting slightly and already covered in a thin sheen of sweat. He slides into the empty stool beside Seungyoon. “We don’t really need a table though – it’s probably good that you stay here at the bar. Everyone needs a drink so they’ll come by and spot you. I’m sure someone will approach soon enough.”
“I sound like a fucking piece of meat,” Seungyoon grimaces. “This is such a demeaning-“
“Shh,” Taehyun’s hand moves to clap at Seungyoon’s mouth before tapping at his thigh. “Look at that guy in green by the stage. I think he’s looking at you.”
“Nope, he’s looking at me,” Jinwoo begs to differ, and Taehyun squints at the guy in question before nodding. “Yeah, he’s looking at Jinwoo. Sorry, Seungyoon.”
“I don’t care,” Seungyoon sighs, taking another sip. Although if he’s being honest, maybe he really isn’t all that desirable, especially when flanked by his friends who have few times been mistaken for models. “Where’s Seunghoon anyway?” Seungyoon asks as he looks around, and Taehyun points to the middle of the dance floor where Seunghoon’s hands are already at some girl’s waist, and he’s lewdly grinding against her back. Seungyoon’s eyes grow wide.
“We’ve been here ten minutes, how the fuck does he do that?”
“He’s what we call a career pick up artist,” Taehyun chuckles. “Anyway don’t worry about him, worry about yourself. And maybe our ride after this – it looks like we’re going to get ditched.”
Seungyoon shakes his head and finds himself nursing his drink faster than usual. Perhaps it’s the nerves, or his subconscious desire to just get drunk so he can get out of this. Come to think of it, that’s not such a bad idea.
“Uhm, excuse me,” Seungyoon yells over the thumping of the club music, hoping the bartender could hear. Jinwoo has decided to pursue the guy in the green shirt – at least that’s another one off his back, but Taehyun, more relentless than he’s ever been, not even when he was promoting his mini art exhibit at the university library last year – had made his way across the club to ‘scout’ for more prospects for Seungyoon. Which leaves Seungyoon all alone to follow his new course of action which involves the bartender cooperating. “Excuse me! Sir!” Seungyoon calls out again.
“Another rum coke?” The bartender asks when he turns around, arm outstretched to hand some guy his own drink.
“Yeah,” Seungyoon nods. “And please keep it coming.”
The bartender tilts his head, traces of a smile in his mouth. He’s already moving his hands expertly from across the bar to make Seungyoon’s drink. “Bad day?”
“It was going good until my friends decided to turn me into a whore,” Seungyoon replies, a little too truthfully, but he supposes that’s okay since bartenders can barely hear over the music and are mostly just there to fix drinks and pretend like they listen.
But to Seungyoon’s surprise, the bartender laughs, hands materializing from under the bar with Seungyoon’s glass that’s now filled nearly to the brim. “Yeah I suppose that one guy with the parted hair was too much when he said he won’t let you leave the club until you find someone to fuck.”
Seungyoon chokes on his own drink, and the bartender is quick to hand him some tissues, all while looking very amused at Seungyoon’s expense. But he makes up for it by fixing Seungyoon a glass of water, which Seungyoon takes immediately. He examines the bartender's face through the rim, hoping the club is dark enough to hide Seungyoon's stained cheeks.
“You heard that?”
“I sort of hear all the conversations that take place in this general vicinity,” he makes a show of sweeping his hands over the bartop. Seungyoon tries not to focus too much on the veins in his arms that Seungyoon is noticing for the first time. The bartender grins warmly and Seungyoon couldn’t help but smile back.
“So now you know why you have to keep the drinks coming. If I have to suffer through this, I should make sure I’m well inebriated.”
“Well then it’s a good thing I never run out of rum,” he quips, which makes Seungyoon laugh. It’s not even that funny, but there’s something so genial about the man that puts Seungyoon at ease for the first time since coming to that club. Maybe this is why he’s a bartender – he’s rather good at making people comfortable.
For a while, the bartender gets busy and Seungyoon continues to just drink, talking to the few people who do approach him. There’s one guy, perhaps ten years older, who seems very interested but is way too grope-y for Seungyoon’s liking. Seungyoon tells him he's there with friends (which wasn't entirely a lie), but the guy knows a rejection when he hears one so he scuttles along to the next target. Then there’s a young boy with electric blue hair and the goofiest smile, but who probably isn’t older than seventeen. Why he was allowed in this club in the first place, Seungyoon has no idea. But no, he’s not that desperate to go for potential jailbaits. Pass. There are also girls, beautiful ones, giving him the googly eyes but unfortunately, Seungyoon just doesn’t swing that way. How he wishes he did then the potential to find someone decent might actually triple.
Taehyun eventually comes back with a man in hand, whose name is either Jackson or Markson or something along those lines, Seungyoon realizes he cares little for it. He’s actually above average in the looks department, but by the way his eyes keep straying away, it's obvious he's more interested in Taehyun than anyone else. Seungyoon may not have gotten laid in eight months but he has more pride than that. Seungyoon tells Taehyun as much, who only sighs in exasperation.
And so Seungyoon keeps drinking, Taehyun keeps searching, Seunghoon and Jinwoo are probably already getting some action somewhere, and the bartender is doing a great job of making everyone who orders drinks feel like they’re chummy. Sometimes Seungyoon would catch his eyes while he works and he never misses to give Seungyoon a little smile that makes his stomach flip just a tiny bit. And like Seungyoon had requested, his glass is never empty for too long, like amidst chaos of the party and manning the bar with just one other bartender, he’s actually keeping an eye on Seungyoon.
Seungyoon isn’t really sure if their brief conversation earlier could be considered flirting or just talking but out of everyone he’d talked to today, what he had with the bartender was the closest to an actual connection. He’s very cute, now that Seungyoon has had time to ogle him for an entire hour. He has intense dark eyes and the most delicious tanned skin, with arms that are practically tree trunks.
But bartenders are being paid to be charming, and he’s been nothing but exactly that to everyone. Seungyoon can’t assume that he’s interested, which makes this whole club trip all the more sad.
So it’s back to plan B – get drunk enough that Taehyun couldn’t possibly allow him to go home with anyone.
As another club banger begins to shake the room and there are wild cheers on the dance floor, he swivels around to change his drink. Rum isn’t really cutting it anymore and if he wants to go home, he’ll have to start drinking the hard stuff.
But when he turns to the bar to order a tequila shot, the cute bartender is gone, and there’s someone else looking at him expectantly.
“Uhm,” Seungyoon looks over the man’s shoulder, neck craned to search for his bartender while he stalls his order. “I’ll have a shot of tequila, I guess,” he finally says, deflated, after an eye sweep of his surroundings and still no cute bartender in sight.
The man nods and proceeds to prepare his drink, and if Seungyoon doesn’t think it pathetic, his head would have landed onto the bartop now so he can lament his misfortune. Then again, it’s not like the bartender was interested. If he was, he would have at least said goodbye.
In the middle of a Bigbang song that’s getting everyone except for Seungyoon hyped up, he feels a hand land on his lower back.
“Taehyun, let’s just give up. No one wants to have sex with me okay,” he says before he turns to face his friend.
Except shit, it’s not Taehyun.
“Hey,” he says with a small laugh, looking even more attractive after a change of clothes. He’s wearing a casual flannel shirt now, buttoned low enough to expose what looks to be impressive pecs. He’s smiling brightly at Seungyoon. It’s the bartender. Seungyoon’s bartender.
“Hi,” Seungyoon manages to squeak, a little flustered.
“Listen, I don’t do this very often, but, uhh, do you really want your friends off your back?” He asks, and Seungyoon notes the shy, somewhat embarrassed lilt to his deep voice.
“Yes,” Seungyoon nods absently, heartbeat quickening. “Definitely.”
“Okay, so...” He rubs the back of his neck, bottom lip caught between his teeth and Seungyoon thinks it’s so endearing. Fuck. This is it. “My shift is over and my apartment isn’t far and you’re really hot so if you’re interested–“
Seungyoon doesn’t even let him finish and yanks his shirt to pull him in. This is so wrong, something at the back of Seungyoon’s mind nags, but the guy’s lips are so fucking soft and very welcoming, tongue so pliant that Seungyoon finds himself moaning against his mouth. It’s been so long for him, to have someone to kiss like this, to have his body respond to this kind of heat and maybe Taehyun is right – this is exactly what he needs.
Seungyoon doesn’t even realize that the guy is completely pressed onto him now and Seungyoon's back is almost already arched over the bar, while his legs trap the guy’s strong thighs. They keep going at it without a care for the people who Seungyoon thinks are probably staring at this point, and when Seungyoon remembers where they are, he pushes the guy slightly and pulls away from his mouth.
“Fuck,” Seungyoon whispers, wheezing for air, fist still on the guy’s shirt. Around them, the party still goes on, with only just a few pleased-looking people paying them any attention. But the guy is looking at Seungyoon like they’re the only two people there, moist lips stretched into a small, satisfied smile. It makes every nerve in Seungyoon’s body tingle in anticipation.
And so Seungyoon says the words he never thought he’d ever say to a complete stranger: “Let’s get out of here.”