Top Surgery (Clove x Deadlock)

by kenaisun

Summary:

It's not really necessary; after all, nonbinary people remain valid in all the ways they wish to behave socially, whether demonstrating more femininity, masculinity or androgyny. However, it's about feeling good about one's appearance. Because of this, Clove didn't express fear about actually undergoing surgery, but they found themselves worried about the reaction of people in their social circle. Especially Deadlock, their girlfriend.

How would she react to seeing their scars? Would they still accept them? Would they still love them?

CloveLock | Clove x Deadlock | One shot

Notes:

i wrote this because it had been on my mind for a long time, but i never put this idea into practice for fear of not representing us non-binary people well, even though i myself am non-binary and live like this every day of my life.

Maybe I'm just overthinking and worrying, but I'm always open to learning more and acknowledging my mistakes, so don't be afraid to correct me. I'll happily accept it!

Message given, i hope you enjoy reading it!

btw:
Du ser så pen ut = You look so pretty

Clove has always been completely open about their preferences and desires, always making it clear their dream of seeking to feel better about themselves, through their social presentation—whether through the way they dress, groom themselves, or carry themselves. And while they weren't afraid to state their pronoun preferences and the gender they identify with, they still feel something is missing. Something a little more complex, in a way.

A surgery to completely remove the breasts.

That it's not really necessary; after all, nonbinary people remain valid in all the ways they wish to behave socially, whether demonstrating more femininity, masculinity or androgyny. However, it's about feeling good about one's appearance. Because of this, Clove didn't express fear about actually undergoing surgery, but they found themselves worried about the reaction of people in their social circle. Especially Deadlock, their girlfriend.

How would she react to seeing their scars? Would they still accept them? Would they still love them?

Maybe they were thinking too much. They needed to breathe. Calm down. They wouldn't be able to face their girlfriend if they were so nervous. They sighed a few times. They counted to ten. And then they tried their best not to show their worry in their expression and body language, smiling, before knocking on the door.

Clove held their hands behind their backs, shifting their weight between their legs as they waited for Deadlock.

"Clove."

A small smile spread across Iselim's face at the sight of Clove, who also felt instantly happy to see her again. They couldn't put into words the happiness they felt growing within them at seeing their girlfriend again.

"Locky." They smiled, wanting to hug her, but avoided doing so. "I missed you."

"Come in," she said, taking Clove's hand and gently pulling them into the room, closing the door once they were both in the same room.

Deadlock almost immediately cupped Clove's face in her hands, looking down to make eye contact with them, and placed a soft kiss on their lips. The Scottish blushed slightly, surprised by the display of affection coming first from Iselim, but they didn't hesitate to close their eyes and hold her waist, returning the kiss, however small and quick it was.

"I'm sorry I disappeared and... didn't tell you anything—" Clove looked away, scratching the back of their necks. "Things... happened."

Deadlock arched an eyebrow.

"Do you feel comfortable talking about it?"

Iselim wouldn't admit it under any circumstances, but she found herself extremely worried, missing her partner terribly. To make matters worse, there was no particularly reliable news, and it was eating her up inside.

Clove sighed.
There was no way out now.

"Well—so… what happened was… Ihadamastectomy."

"Wait, what?"

"I—you know what… I think it's easier for you to see."

They moved away from their girlfriend only to remove their shirt, revealing the relatively recent surgery. The scars below where a pair of "feminine" breasts had previously been. They let the fabric of their shirt slip through their fingers, falling to the floor beside them, while they waited patiently for any kind of reaction from Iselim.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you anything about it and… just disappeared all this time. I… I wanted to tell you, but—but I—"

"Hey." Deadlock approached them again, cupping their faces lovingly. "Don't worry. I understand."

She brought their faces closer, caressing their cheeks with her thumb as their noses touched. Deadlock sensed Clove needed that brief moment of silence, bringing some peace to that worried and anxious little heart. The truth is, the Norwegian woman, deep down, felt somewhat sad for not having been part of that entire phase of her partner' life, but she understood their hesitation, their fear of not being accepted. However, she hated knowing that Clove felt that same apprehension, this fear of not being accepted by her. She wanted Clove to feel comfortable with their non-binary identity, wanted them to know that it doesn't diminish the love she feels for them, it only enhances it.

"Du ser så pen ut." she whispered, peppering Clove's face with kisses.

Notes:

Thanks for reading! Consider leaving a nice comment and kudos, I'll love reading and responding to each one. 🫶