Chapter 1: One favour
Chapter Text
It was training time for the Trojans, everyone was running across the court, passing balls, hitting the wall, others at the goal, like Laila, who was blocking every ball Cody was throwing at her. Meanwhile, on another part of the court, Cat was practicing passes and how to dodge opponents with Jean. Everyone could tell how Jean was trying to not be too harsh on Cat, or on himself. It was something Jeremy always noticed, his eyes searching for and glued on Jean, excusing it by saying he was worried about how being an ex-Raven might affect him in training. The force with which Jean sometimes slammed his stick against the floor, only to immediately apologize to everyone and the coach.
This time wasn’t different from the other ones. Cat was taking practice lightly, laughing whenever Jean threw the ball too high or too low and missed. Jean, on the other hand, always pushed himself to bring out the best in training, hating mistakes and punishing himself for them.
At some point, a loud crash echoed across the court, Jean had broken his stick slamming it against the floor, near Cat almost hitting her leg. She couldn't react, she stopped laughing, her expression turning more serious, but not out of anger or fear.
“What happened? Are you okay?” asked Laila as she came up beside Cat. Laila scanned her girlfriend with her eyes and, seeing she was unhurt, turned to Jean. He simply averted his gaze and whispered, “Sorry,” so softly that those on the other side of the court couldn’t hear it.
Jeremy had been watching everything from the back. He dropped his stick on the floor and walked toward Jean to check what had happened to make him act that way. He came closer after hearing the crash, worried that one of his teammates might be hurt. As the Captain, he had to restore order on the court and call Jean out for his behavior, yet he never could. Jeremy couldn’t be harsh with Jean because he knew Jean never meant to hurt anyone, least of all Cat or Laila. But he never knew how to help him.
“Hey, come on, it’s not a big deal. I’ll take Jean to rest on the bench, the rest of you can keep going,” Jeremy said as he walked up beside Jean, looking at his eyes which were empty, without any emotion. He had no idea how to help him. Jean was hard to read. Every time it seemed like they made progress, they ended up taking a step back. Jean let his emotions control him, let his memories of the Nest consume him.
As they headed for the exit, Jeremy approached Cat to ask if everything was alright.
“Don’t worry, Cap, it’s not the first time and won’t be the last. It’s partly my fault too…I should apologize to him later,” Cat replied with a big smile. Jeremy knew Cat would never hold Jean’s outbursts against him, she knew him well enough to forgive him. But Jeremy didn’t want her to get used to his violence.
Jean had already gone to the locker rooms without waiting for Jeremy. Meanwhile Jeremy explained the situation to the coach, who was always keeping an eye on Jean’s progress and lending a hand to help him.
Jean felt pathetic. He felt like he’d fallen back into a pit where the floor was quicksand, trying to drag him down until only his hair remained above the surface. Maybe the weight was too much, maybe Jean was pressuring himself too hard to stay in his role as a perfect Trojan player. But it was impossible, the trace of the Ravens’ hands and voices would always follow him, even into his worst nightmares.
He heard the door creak open slowly and then close softly. Jean knew exactly who it was, he didn’t need to lift his head to recognize the worried gaze of his captain. He hated himself for making Jeremy stop smiling and furrow his brows.
He felt a weight settle on the bench beside him, though leaving a bit of space. Jeremy had always respected him since the first day he arrived in LA. Jean had been insecure about meeting the Trojans’ captain and unwilling to explain himself, maybe to be honest, he had been so nervous about finally meeting the famous Jeremy Knox in person. But apparently, someone had already told Jeremy that Jean wasn’t one person who was into physical contact, and Jean had been grateful for that.
Jean allowed himself to glance up at the Trojans’ training jersey Jeremy was wearing. His torso was outlined with sweat, the shirt sticking to his chest. Jean quickly looked away, feeling drops of sweat running down his back, his heart pounding so fast he thought he might need to see the nurse. Perhaps he was about to have a heart attack. He refocused on his sneakers, all while feeling Jeremy’s fixed gaze on him. Neither said a word until Jeremy finally broke the silence.
“I’m not going to force you to tell me what happened,” Jeremy said, swallowing hard as if searching for the right words. “But if at any point you feel frustrated, you can come to me, I wouldn’t mind.” This time it was Jeremy who lowered his gaze to the floor, then to the lockers, and finally back to Jean. His cheeks were slightly red, maybe from the heat inside the locker room, even though it was just the two of them.
Jean had managed to look him in the eyes. He wanted to find some trace of pity in Jeremy’s words, some excuse to refuse him, but he couldn’t. The only thing he found in Jeremy was compassion and a hint of curiosity. Jean knew that Jeremy wasn’t afraid of discovering whatever he might be hiding.
Jean opened his mouth to say something but closed it again, until a few seconds later. When Jeremy broke eye contact, the words finally came out of Jean’s throat, though it sounded as if he had been screaming all day.
“I don’t understand. I don’t understand you all” he confessed, closing his eyes, lowering his head, and covering his face with his hands. Jeremy looked back at him, this time more confused. Seeing that Jeremy wasn’t going to say anything, Jean continued explaining himself.
“I don’t understand why you keep insisting on trying to understand me. I don’t understand why you forgive everything I do wrong,” he said, lifting his head and locking his gray eyes on Jeremy’s brown ones. This time, Jeremy didn’t dare to look away. “I don’t deserve your kindness and hospitality.”
Jeremy was about to protest when Jean cut him off, standing up from the bench and walking toward his locker. From it, he pulled out a peach, one Jeremy remembered from a brief interaction between Cody and Jean. That day Cody had brought a peach to eat after practice, but when he heard that Jean had never tasted one, he gave it to him without a second thought. “No one has more peaches than my family,” Cody had said with a laugh to convince Jean to keep it. Jean had been surprised that Cody hadn’t asked for anything in return, that it really had just been a gesture of their friendship and care.
“Why don’t you ask for something in return? That’s the only thing the Ravens ever gave in exchange for something else” Jean said, turning back toward Jeremy, who was still sitting and watching him with an expression Jean couldn’t read. Was it pity? Sadness? Anger? This time, Jean let Jeremy speak.
“Listen, Jean, between us no one asks for anything in return,” Jeremy said, standing and taking a few steps toward him. He extended his hand to touch Jean’s, but stopped just before remembering that Jean didn’t allow contact without permission. “If someone gives you something, it has to come from your heart to give them something back. We’ll never force you to do something you don’t wanna. It’s not your duty to repay every person who’s kind to you, because that’s the least you should expect from someone.” This time he smiled as he said the last words. Jeremy was a proud captain who cared for all his teammates, though he admittedly liked some more than others. Still, that never affected the team’s performance. He knew how to be a good captain, always separating his personal life from his role as leader of the Trojans.
“If I do something for you… you don’t need me to give you anything in return?” Jean asked, glancing from the peach back to Jeremy.
“I suppose since it’s you, I’d love to return the favor as many times as you wanted,” Jeremy said with a grin, heading toward the locker room door. Just before leaving, he turned on his heel to look back at Jean.
“Don’t worry about Cody, a simple ‘thank you’ would make him happy. That won’t be the last peach he gives you,” Jeremy said with a laugh. He opened the locker room door, inviting Jean to step out, but didn’t rush him, he gave him as much time as he needed to breathe and compose himself. Jeremy was different when it came to Jean: he brake all his walls and open every door, always trying to give him calm and trust. Jean knew Jeremy trusted him. Jean knew Jeremy would never hurt him. And Jean knew he needed to give something back to Jeremy.
The two of them returned to the court when practice was almost over. Cat came over to apologize to Jean for laughing, she hadn’t realized she was crossing his boundaries and felt guilty for his reaction. Jean accepted her apology and then apologized to Cat and to the rest of the team again.
When practice ended, Coach Rehmann approached Jean to talk to him. Jeremy nodded and headed back to the locker room with the others, leaving them alone. Jean apologized once more.
“You don’t need to keep apologizing,” said Rehmann, making Jean straighten up and frown. “Everyone has bad days, you should have seen Jeremy in his early years,” he added in a whisper, as if Jeremy might overhear, even though he was far enough away that it was impossible.
“Jeremy?”
“Back then he was incorrigible. But all he really needed was a little space and support.” This time Rehmann’s voice carried a more nostalgic tone, making Jean think about that time. Jean had been 16 when Jeremy was 18 and just being a freshman. Jean hated thinking about those years, and his body trembled.
“Look, you don’t need to focus on the past anymore. Now Jeremy has given everything of himself for the team and his friends, you can take that as something he offered in return,” said Rehmann, calming Jean with a few pats on the shoulder. “Go on, I’m sure they’re waiting for you inside. And don’t worry, they never hold a grudge against one of their own. They’re very good at giving second chances, and I think you deserve as many as you ask for.”
Jean was about to protest, but saw Rehmann walk away toward his office. Many times, Jean felt like he was in a dream, but he was afraid of waking up and realizing he was still in the Nest or afraid of waking up and realizing he was still 14 years old.
He ran toward the locker room and pushed the door open harder than he intended. All eyes turned to him, but Jean was only searching for a pair of brown eyes, Jeremy’s. He found them, Jeremy was talking with Xavier, probably about the team and upcoming games. Jeremy wore only a towel wrapped around his waist, his chest bare, and Jean had to make an effort to not look away from his eyes.
“Something wrong?” Jeremy asked in the soft tone he always used with Jean. The rest of the team went back to what they were doing, and the noise of chatter, water running off the showers, and laughter filled the locker room again. But Jean could only hear his own heartbeat and see the smile on Jeremy’s lips. Jean stepped closer to him and touched Jeremy’s arm, then his cheeks, and finally his silky hair. Jeremy didn’t know whether to move or stay still.
“You’re not a dream” Jean said without hesitation, making Jeremy turn red from head to toe.
“I don’t know if I should take that as a sign of you always thinking about me.” Jeremy teased.
This time Jean made sure not to fall into the pit of his own mind, accepting that Jeremy wasn’t just a dream to him. Jean kept his gaze fixed on Jeremy, who looked around, but no one else was paying attention to them. It was just the two of them amid all the chaos. And Jean focused only on all the freckles scattered across Jeremy’s body, his toned arms, the occasional cut and bruise from training, his lips that were always smiling, his eyes that could be mistaken for gold, and his damp hair dripping water onto his face. Jean wanted to make sure all of it was real, but he knew that might be strange and uncomfortable, so he buried those thoughts and simply walked past Jeremy.
“I’m going to shower,” Jean said, redirecting Jeremy’s attention back to him. Jeremy smiled and nodded.
Jean felt that just one favor wouldn’t be enough to repay Jeremy for everything he had done and keep doing for him, but he also knew Jeremy would be stubborn enough to not accept anything in return, and in that, both of them were very similar.
Chapter 2: Letting go with a condition
Summary:
“I want to see him happy.”
Cat turned to him and pinched his cheek.
“And that’s why you’re a good person” she said laughing.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
It was almost 1 a.m. when Jean heard the front door open, but not close.
Jean had woken up from one of his nightmares, thirsty, and had gone to the kitchen for a glass of water just as he heard the jingling of some keys and the door opening. He quickly turned on himself to see who was behind him, but he hadn’t seen anyone yet and the door hadn’t closed yet.
Jean thought and thought, going over all the possible people who might enter Laila’s house in the middle of the night with a key. Possibly some relative of Laila wanting to talk about paperwork, but that made no sense at such a late hour.
Or maybe the coach, though why would he come at 1 a.m. to talk when he could do it the next day? Jean went on guard, quickly looking around the kitchen for something he could use as a weapon. He grabbed one of the knives Cat and he used to cut fruit, but maybe it wouldn’t do much to defend against someone with a firearm, but it made him feel a little safer.
He waited in the kitchen, staring at the door, waiting for someone to appear, and indeed, someone did. He didn’t need to turn on the light to recognize the silhouette that walked past the kitchen door. Someone hunched over, dragging a bag, probably the Trojans’ training bag.
Jean put the knife back in its place and quietly followed the silhouette, which was heading toward his room. What would be the need for this person to enter Jean’s room?
Jean’s room still hadn’t been decorated with bright colors, the gray of the walls made it even darker than it already was. His room only contained a bed under the window, a single bed that Laila had let him choose when they went shopping, and an empty desk. Jean had wanted to paint his room a color that wasn’t black or red, but they didn't have time for it.
The person entered his room, first knocking three times, waiting, then knocking three more times again before peeking in. Jean knew who always did that, only one person bothered to knock three times.
Jean was standing right behind the person, who was a few centimeters shorter than him and had messy, or maybe just wavy hair. The person turned when they saw Jean wasn’t in his room and jumped back when they realized he was standing right behind them.
“God, Jean, you almost scared me to death,” he whispered, careful not to wake up the girls.
“Jeremy?”
“Yes, it’s me. I know I wasn’t supposed to come tonight, I’m sorry if I woke you up,” Jeremy said, scratching his neck and avoiding Jean’s eyes. Jean could sense the nervousness in his words and wondered what could be the case he was running from, though deep down he already knew the answer.
Jeremy sighed and finally lifted his gaze to Jean. His brown eyes, a little red, looked into Jean’s tired gray ones. Maybe it was from the strong wind or the pollution outside, but Jean knew perfectly well Jeremy had been crying.
“Aren’t you going to say anything?” Jeremy asked in a thread of a voice, as if he wanted to hide quickly before being found.
“No.” Jean frowned, searching for words to make his captain feel better, to make him smile, to erase the redness from his eyes. “I’ll only ask you when you want me to.” His accent betrayed a slight concern in his voice.
Jeremy was surprised and gave a faint smile. “Ask me,” he said, not wanting to sound too desperate for someone to talk to.
“Can I help you somehow?” Jean whispered to Jeremy, wanting everything between them to stay just for themselves, a secret from the outside world that only Jean knew.
“You already do.” Jeremy replied in the soft voice he always uses when he spoke with Jean, or when they are alone. Jeremy’s eyes roamed across Jean’s face, and Jean’s eyes wandered across Jeremy’s whole body.
“I can offer you everything I can give” Jean insisted, leaving Jeremy momentarily speechless.
Jeremy dropped his bag on the floor, right at the entrance to Jean’s room, and gave a faint smile while looking down. Jean knew that little habit of Jeremy’s perfectly, he did it when he didn’t want to accept something, although he knew he needed it.
“Can I?”
“Yes.”
And Jeremy, with delicacy and without wanting to do anything that could make Jean uncomfortable, wrapped his arms around his waist and pulled him closer. For Jean, for the first time, the hug was neither cold nor painful. It was the opposite, warm and comforting, infused with Jeremy’s essence, Jeremy smelled more like home and less like his house.
Jean hated how Jeremy was affected by his other home, his siblings, his mother, his stepfather, the death of his little brother Noah, and how it had struck him in every way. Jeremy always hid his crying, but Jean never stopped hearing it.
“I’m sorry.”
“You don’t need to apologize” Jean replied once more to Jeremy’s constant apologies.
“My mother’s angry at me again, my stepfather keeps calling me faggot, everyone already hates me, and I can’t escape that place.” Jeremy swallowed “I'm trapped”
Jean let Jeremy pour it all out. When Jeremy didn’t say anything more, waiting for Jean’s response, Jean took him by the chin and made him look into his eyes. Jeremy didn’t want him to see him like that, but they had faced worse situations.
“Don’t ever again say everyone hates you,” Jean said, stepping closer, his words cutting through the air. “Nobody hates you, you could never be the villain in anyone’s story.”
Jeremy let out a bitter laugh. “You’d be surprised” but his voice didn't sound happy. “I’m the villain in more than one story,” his voice was full of sadness. “And it’s all my fault.” and finally he sounded defeated.
Jean didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t always know what to do. He tried wiping the tears from his captain’s cheeks, but for every one he brushed away, two more came. He didn’t know how to stop that flood.
“It’s not your fault. You didn’t know, and you couldn’t have known,” Jean said, trying to calm him. “And it hurts.”
Alarmed by those last words, Jeremy looked at Jean again, worried he was hurt or bleeding. Jean knew that even if Jeremy were in the middle of nowhere, bleeding out with no signal, his first thought would be if Jean was okay. Jean adored his concern, but he also hated his recklessness.
“It hurts to see the people I love suffer and not be able to do anything.”
Jeremy kept crying in Jean’s hands, feeling pathetic, but held. “I’m sorry for being so difficult,” he said, keeping his voice firm, not wanting to break. Very rarely did he show himself like this to anyone, but with Jean, he didn’t feel the need to hide.
“I want to save you,” Jean murmured.
I want to save us.
It was mutual. Both wanted to be saved, and both wanted to save each other. And Jean had many favours he wanted to repay to Jeremy.
———
Jeremy came out of the shower wearing boxers and a loose T-shirt he usually wore as pajamas around the house, though to be honest he often slept shirtless, his body gave off enough heat to keep him warm through the night.
Jean was sitting on the edge of his bed, wearing a blue T-shirt borrowed from Jeremy during his first days in L.A., a pair of shorts he had bought himself, and looking thoughtful. He was still deciding what he could do for Jeremy, wanting to give him everything. He had never opened up to anyone this much before, not even with Kevin he had crossed the line past teammates. But for Jeremy, he was willing to break down any wall.
“You can sleep here.” Jean gestured toward his bed, actually, the only one in the room. Though it looked narrow, Jean had calculated that two bodies of their size could fit.
“Will you be okay?” Jeremy asked, worried about making Jean uncomfortable or ruining his night.
“It’s fine, I can handle it. It doesn’t bother me.”
Jeremy flashed his bright smile at Jean, a wordless thank-you. He approached the edge of the bed and let Jean in first, letting him choose his side. Jean pressed himself against the wall, eyes fixed on the door and his back against the cold wall.
Jeremy slipped under the sheets slowly, letting Jean follow every movement so he could feel safe with him in his bed. He rested his cheek against the pillow that carried Jean’s scent, his back to the door, his brown eyes meeting Jean’s gray ones after a while. For Jean, that moment felt like standing naked, his soul laid bare. But he dared to trust someone, and that someone was Jeremy Knox.
“Are you okay?” Jeremy asked again.
“With you I feel safe,” Jean declared. He saw Jeremy’s face blush and his smile widen.
But after a few seconds that felt like minutes of looking into each other’s eyes, Jeremy sighed. He knew this wouldn’t last forever, no matter how much he wanted it. His fear of losing everything was always lurking, and this time, it was knocking at the door.
“Tomorrow I’ll have to talk with Laila and we should probably go to my house.” Jeremy’s smile faded into a more serious expression. Jean slid his hand up Jeremy’s jaw to his cheek, stroking it with his thumb. For the first time, Jean’s gaze wasn’t alert. He only saw Jeremy and no danger in him.
“Everything will be okay. I can go with you.”
“It’s a family matter. I don’t want to burden you with more problems.”
“You never do,” Jean assured him, his serious tone making it clear he meant it. Jean truly would give a part of himself for Jeremy.
Maybe Jean didn’t know how to name the weight in his chest or the ache in his stomach whenever he was in such intimate moments with Jeremy. He didn’t know why his hands started to sweat or why Jeremy’s lips looked fuller, or why he wondered what they tasted like. He felt like he might throw up, but didn’t know why.
Then Jeremy leaned closer, cupped Jean’s face in his hands, and kissed his forehead. “Is that okay?” he whispered as if Jean was a child.
“Yes.”
It’s always okay with you.
But Jean kept those last words to himself. He knew he didn’t need to say them, Jeremy could hear them anyway. Both had taken time to trust each other, and in that, they weren’t so different. Both only needed someone who trust in them.
And they fell asleep, Jeremy’s steady breathing keeping Jean grounded in the same orbit as him, Laila, Cat, and Jabberwocky Moreau. Without even knowing it, Jeremy could ward off Jean’s nightmares.
———
That night Jean slept without nightmares. Jeremy’s soft breathing had helped him drift off. He could hear it and feel it, it was like a hug that didn’t let him go, but he didn’t want to let go of either.
Sunlight began filtering through the curtains. Jean was about to open his eyes when he felt fingers gently brush his hair back and then lips pressing a kiss on his forehead. He heard footsteps fade away, and when he opened his eyes, he saw Jeremy’s back disappearing through the door.
He sat for a moment, lingering in the sensation of Jeremy’s fingers in his hair and his lips against his skin for the second time. His lips had been soft, delicate, always reddish and shiny, probably from the Vaseline Jean often saw him apply.
Jean sat up, not thinking about anything, just staring at the spot Jeremy’s head had left on the pillow. Then he got up, crossed the doorway, glanced at the clock on the nightstand that read 8 a.m., and walked down the aisle. Voices came from the kitchen, they sounded like Laila and Jeremy. They seemed to be arguing, though that seemed impossible. They were as close as siblings, but Laila’s voice had risen. Jean stopped at the kitchen doorway, listening. Without knowing why he couldn't just enter the kitchen.
“You can’t do that, Jeremy. You’re putting your future at risk,” Laila’s voice rose over Jeremy’s. “Do you think they’ll just let you go like that?” Silence followed, as if she were waiting for his response.
“I’d never leave you, but it’s the only way my mother will let me leave home,” Jeremy’s voice was much lower, as if he didn’t believe what he was saying.
“How do you know? Your mother will do everything she can to ruin your life. We’re your only family.”
“I hate it when you get like this” and Jean could hear how Jeremy’s voice cracked.
“Jeremy, I’m really sorry,” Laila said, sounding truly regretful for yelling at him. “But what will you tell Jean? Will you abandon him too?”
Jeremy said nothing. Jean froze at the word *abandon*. It repeated in his head again and again. He couldn’t understand it coming from Jeremy, it wasn’t something he could do. Not Jeremy.
“Jean?”
“Yes, Jean. You know how he is when you’re around” Laila pressed. “He sleeps better, his performance in games and practices improves a hundred percent just because YOU are there, because he sees you’re okay.”
This time, it was Jeremy who got speechless.
“You know exactly what you are for Jean.” And Jeremy did. They were partners everywhere. Sometimes he even forgot they were only supposed to be that way on the court. But he couldn’t help it, Jeremy loved Jean like he’d never loved anyone, and he hated himself every time he hurt him.
“Jeremy.”
“I know. And I don’t want to do it either.”
Laila sounded defeated, but a second later Jeremy’s phone rang, the ringtone everyone in the house hated. It meant his mother was calling. Jean couldn’t hear what they said, though. He could only hear his own heartbeat, so loud he thought it might burst from his chest.
“Jean?” The voice made him turn, though he already knew who it was.
“Oh, Jean,” Cat said, looking at him in the way only she could, cutting through all his defenses, but always asking permission first. Cat knew what Jean was going through. She could see it in his eyes, and right now his eyes were grayer than ever.
“Jean, listen to me, copy my movements, okay?” Cat placed a hand on his chest, it wasn’t the first time, and began to inhale. “I want you to focus on filling your belly with air, then exhale.”
She demonstrated, and Jean frowned but followed her instructions. He tried to focus on breathing, but it hurt. Cat’s hand over his chest radiated warmth, wrapping his heart in a protective layer.
“Very good, everything will be okay.” Then she pulled Jean into a hug, kissing his forehead, right next to where Jeremy had kissed him. She held his face in her hands, pressed her forehead against his, and after a few seconds Jean finally let out what was choking him.
“Why does it hurt so much?”
And Cat understood everything.
“Because it hurts when we can’t save the people we love.”
“Does it hurt you too?” Jean asked, clenching his fist against his chest as if he wanted to rip off his shirt and then his skin.
“A lot” Cat said softly, hugging him again and tracing circles on his back. Jean clung to her shirt, burying his face in her shoulder. He didn’t know where to run or if he should.
“Jean.” This time it was Jeremy’s voice. He had come out of the kitchen with Laila, though neither of them spoke yet.
“I—” Jeremy began, but Jean cut him off, although not intentionally.
“You can’t leave us. You belong to be court.”
You belong to this house. You belong to be with me.
Jeremy heard the voices behind Jean’s words. His eyes were clear, sad or maybe disappointed.
“I hate that I didn’t—”
“Stop. You never promised anything. You don’t owe me anything.”
“Jean,” Jeremy’s voice was desperate now. He couldn’t lose Jean. He couldn’t lose himself again. Without Jean, he knew he would sink.
“Jean, we’ll be back. I won’t leave him in that house another second,” Laila interrupted, grabbing Jean’s hand in one of hers and Jeremy’s in the other.
But Jean couldn’t know that. He couldn’t believe when they would return. He didn’t want to lose sight of him, because if not seeing him meant Jeremy was in that house (hell), for Jean it was torture.
“When? And when will he come back?” Jean’s voice was rougher now, his brow furrowed.
“I’ll come back.”
“But you can’t promise that.”
Jeremy looked Jean straight in the eyes, shutting out the world. Jeremy was always afraid of leaving, afraid he wouldn’t come back out with the people he loved. Afraid of losing himself in hookups, afraid of relapsing. Jeremy had many fears, but his greatest was losing Jean’s trust.
Jean had only one fear, the Ravens, because for him, being abandoned again was the worst nightmare.
Jean looked at him with sadness. Jeremy didn’t want to see that expression, it hurt. He had done everything to make him smile, but also everything that could make him sad.
“Am I a villain to you now?” Jeremy asked, terrified of the answer.
“You could never be the villain, not in my story,” Jean replied, because that hurt most of all.
Jeremy looked down, feeling unworthy to face Jean after betraying his trust. But Jean lifted his chin, forcing him to look again.
“I don’t want you to promise me anything. I want you to do it.” And with great fear of breaking Jeremy completely, Jean hugged him for the first time and kissed his forehead.
“I’ll come back.” And this time Jean believed him. Jeremy would never lie to him.
After Jeremy left with Laila, Cat filled Jean in. She explained that they would try to get the papers Jeremy’s mother had hidden in her office. They would talk to William to collaborate, and somehow, three against one, they hoped to win and get Jeremy’s freedom.
And Jean was willing to help. He was willing to bring Jeremy back home.
“Why can’t good people ever be happy?” Jean asked later, while cooking dinner with Cat in the kitchen.
Cat smiled, though it was tinged with sadness. Jean wondered when everything would be like it used to.
“Because bad people don’t want to see them happy.”
“I want to see him happy.”
Cat turned to him and pinched his cheek.
“And that’s why you’re a good person” she said, laughing.
Though Jean had never considered himself as a good person, he let the thought comfort him. Maybe it was true. Maybe he had never been the villain in anyone’s story. And in that, he and Jeremy were the same.
Notes:
Idk why it turned angst, I swear I was gonna do it soft and comfort.
But I finished, I tortured my mind during my 8h road trip, so I hope you enjoy it.
Bye, love u all (@jerejeanever on twt)
tarathestar on Chapter 1 Thu 04 Sep 2025 09:23PM UTC
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solaniii03 on Chapter 1 Thu 04 Sep 2025 11:01PM UTC
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