Chapter Text
“Minho is not going to like this.”
Jisung grits his teeth at Felix’s words, the grip he has on the pen in his hand tightening.
“What Minho thinks doesn’t matter.” It’s a lie. A big, fat lie too, but it has to be said. “Contrary to popular belief, Minho doesn’t decide what I do. I do.”
Felix is an anxious cloud of overly sweet vanilla next to him. “I’m just saying.”
Jisung turns to look at him. He knows Felix only means well. Nothing he could say is going to change Jisung’s mind though.
“I want to try.” He hates how weak his voice sounds to his own ears so he strengthens his tone. “Shouldn’t you, of all people, encourage me? It worked out quite well for you.”
Felix clamps his hand over the mating mark on his neck. He’s the most beautiful person Jisung knows, but it’s an ugly thing, Felix’s mating mark. The scar is gnarly and badly healed from the wound being opened several times over during the claiming. A violent mark from a violent mating ritual.
Soon, Jisung is going to be the same.
“Jisung…Chan nearly killed three people to win. When Minho hears of this—”
“Minho, Minho, Minho,” Jisung accuses as if every second sentence of his didn’t start the same way. “Why do you have to keep bringing him up?”
Felix stares at Jisung in shock. He opens his mouth, closes it and metaphorically tucks his tail between his legs. “Sorry.”
Jisung sighs. The truth is that he already knows why Felix keeps bringing Minho up. Everyone on campus probably knows, except everyone on campus is also fucking wrong because Minho may be the alpha of Jisung’s life, but Jisung is not his omega. If he was, he’d have a mating mark like the rest of his friends. He doesn’t.
He softens his voice. “You’re worrying for nothing, Lix. They’re probably not even going to pick me.”
Felix frowns, looking doubtful but he nods.
“If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure.”
Jisung is sure. He thought about it all summer break. His hand does not shake as he puts pen to paper and puts his name onto the sign-up list for this year’s fox hunt.
For better or for worse, this is what he wants.
*
His friends are already waiting for him when Jisung walks into the cafeteria two days later.
Professor Kim always drones on for ten minutes longer than the allotted lecture time so Jisung is the last to put his tray down on the table. Minho not so gently shoves Changbin out of the way so Jisung can sit next to him. Changbin only rolls his eyes and scoots.
There’s an apology on Jisung’s lips, but it gets stuck in his throat when Minho promptly pulls him into his arms, rubbing his nose all along Jisung’s nape and the sides of his neck.
“By the moon,” Hyunjin mumbles from Changbin’s other side, “keep it cute, would you?”
Minho reaches around Jisung to flip him off, but the scenting does stop after that. Jisung wills himself not to be disappointed. He knows Minho only did it in the first place because it’s the beginning of the academic year and that means a hundred new scents clinging to Jisung every day while he tries to navigate his classes.
Since Jisung is unmated, it’s only natural for Minho, as his alpha best friend, to want to scent him. It’s to keep other, potentially overeager alphas away. Minho is doing it for Jisung’s protection, not because he has a deeper interest. Jisung has come to accept this over the years.
That doesn’t mean Jisung isn’t going to take advantage of it, though. With Minho’s arm still around him, he settles against Minho’s side, resting his head on his shoulder. It’s a bit awkward to reach for his food like this, but Jisung would honestly rather nap than eat anyway. Much like he’d hoped, his problem is solved when Minho starts feeding him.
“Disgusting,” someone that sounds suspiciously like Seungmin says, but Jisung doesn’t care.
He’s happy like this.
He’s getting fed, he’s surrounded by his friends and there’s the scent of woodsmoke engulfing him every time he inhales. It reminds him of bonfires at the beach, specifically the big end-of-the-summer bonfire that his and Minho’s families always set up when their shared summer holidays come to an end. It’s been a tradition for longer than Jisung has been alive and he gets to live in these memories, the happiest of his life, every time he gets another whiff of Minho’s scent.
It’s perfect.
Everything is perfect until the chatter around him stops and Minho stops feeding him at once. His scent thickens, but so do the scents of the other alphas. They can’t help it. It’s what naturally happens when someone who isn’t pack approaches them while they’re eating.
Jisung pops his eyes open to find that they’re indeed no longer alone. Hovering close by is Hwang Yeji, a fellow omega and Hyunjin’s cousin. Yeji is also the sitting president of the foxhunt committee.
Jisung’s heart starts pounding in his chest.
While everyone looks at Yeji with expectant eyes, he can feel Felix stare at him from across the table. Jisung deliberately doesn’t meet his gaze. He’s too busy looking at Yeji himself, who’s staring right back at him. The corners of her mouth quirk up into a smile and Jisung knows that he’s fucked.
He’s so fucked.
There is no way they actually picked him, is there?
He’s not even—
“Hey, Yeji,” Hyunjin says, blissfully obvlivious. “Did auntie send you?”
“No,” Yeji says, her features pulling into a real, giddy smile. “I’m here for Jisung.”
Everyone turns to look at Jisung, who swallows. He believes that this must be how astronauts feel when they feel their spaceship explode beneath them.
“For what?” Chan asks, brows furrowed. He usually doesn’t play up the pack alpha bit, but it comes out when someone wants something from Jisung. Since Jisung doesn’t have an alpha for a mate, Chan is his first and last line of protection.
Or would be.
The arm slung around Jisung’s waist tightens.
“What do you want?” Minho asks,
Yeji raises an eyebrow at him, clearly unimpressed by his curt tone. The moment her eyes fall back on Jisung, she’s smiling again, brighter than ever before. From under her varsity jacket, she takes out a bright pink confetti canon and pops it. Rainbow-coloured confetti goes everywhere.
“Congratulations, Han Jisung,” she cheers. “You are this year’s fox!”
Jisung can pinpoint the exact moment his pack registers what she’s just said. Where everyone was quiet with polite expectancy, the table descends into utter chaos.
“What?!”
“No way!”
“Is this come kind of joke?”
It’s Chan’s voice that rises above the others. “You must be mistaken,” he tells Yeji, a deep furrow between his brows. “Jisung didn’t sign up for this year’s run.”
“Uh.” Yeji pulls a folded out paper. It’s a photo copy of the sign-up list. “Yes, he did.”
Chan takes the paper with furrowed brows, his eyes widening when he reaches the bottom of the page. He looks at Jisung in disbelief. “You really signed up to be this year’s fox?”
Jisung swallows against the weight of everyone looking at him, staring at him in disbelief. One pair of eyes weighs heavier than the rest.
It’s reflexive, the way Jisung turns to look at Minho. His inner omega is begging for a reaction, looking for any signs of displeasure that he’s basically signed his life away to get claimed by someone else, but Minho’s face is completely blank.
“Did you?” Minho asks him. Despite the tension in the air, his voice is soft. He never speaks harshly to Jisung.
Jisung nods, forces a smile onto his face. “I-I did. I’m this year’s fox.”
“No, you’re not!” Changbin exclaims, prompting the others to join in.
“Yeah, what the fuck, Jisung?” Seungmin groans.
“Seriously? Why would you want fifty alphas to chase you around the woods when you have—” Jeongin gets cut off by Felix, elbowing him in the side and shooting him a death glare.
But Jisung is only looking at Minho.
He watches as Minho blinks and blinks again and the third time he does it, his eyes are red when he opens them again. A sliver of panic shoots through Jisung’s chest. Minho’s eyes are never red. Jisung can’t even remember the last time he’s seen them this way. Minho is always in control of himself. He’s always composed and clinical and does not let his alpha rule him. But right now, his eyes are red and his scent is so potent in the air it makes Jisung choke. Where he was roasting smores at a small bonfire, he’s suddenly caught in the middle of a forest fire.
“Minho?”
“Oh fuck,” Changbin whispers and then Jisung is no longer where he was.
Changbin bodily lifts him out of his seat, dragging him backwards and away from the table. Minho is coming after them. Minho is coming after them until Chan is there and then Jeongin, but even together they’re struggling to hold Minho back. Minho, who is only looking at Jisung.
He growls, way too loud considering they’re in the middle of the cafeteria. It’s embarrassing. It's archaic with how animalistic he sounds.
Jisung doesn’t know what to do, but there is not much he can do. He’s little more than dead weight as Changbin carries him out of the cafeteria.
“Jisung!” Minho howls after him, but he’s not strong enough to evade both Jeongin and Chan, who’s forced to dig his claws into the scruff of Minho’s neck, just so evading the fangs Minho snaps at him.
Much to Jisung’s surprise (and eternal embarrassment) Yeji comes with them. She waits until Changbin has set Jisung back onto his feet before she comes any closer.
“Hey, uh, can I talk to you for a moment?”
Jisung, still feeling a little dazed, nods. Yeji looks at Changbin, who gets the message.
“I’ll be right here,” he tells Jisung, pointing at a row of chairs right next to the cafeteria doors. “Don’t go farther than the end of the hallway, okay?”
Jisung nods again and then lets Yeji lead him down the hall.
Despite what just happened, she looks surprisingly chipper. Her grin is downright teasing. “So, I guess that was one contender?”
Jisung flushes, trying hard not to feel even more embarrassed than he already is. “No, uh, no. Minho’s not gonna run.”
“Really?” She looks surprisingly…surprised.
Jisung’s worst quality is that he’s a nervous talker. “Minho thinks the foxhunt is barbaric. He says it’s an outdated ritual that reinforces negative stereotypes about omegas in society and…” Jisung sees the expression on Yeji’s face and cuts himself off with a wince. “He’s just not a fan.”
“Well, he sure is a fan of something,” she mutters before side-eyeing him in a way that undoubtedly proves her blood relation to Hyunjin, “or rather someone.”
“Minho is not going to participate,” Jisung reiterates. He sounds tired, even to his own ears. “You can’t really make him do things he doesn’t want to and he doesn’t want to run.”
“Well, do you want to run?”
Jisung blanches.
“Because, honestly,” the smile wanes from Yeji’s face, “we were a little surprised when we saw your name on the sign-up form. All of us thought you already had an alpha, you know, the one that just nearly took out two of your friends to get to you.”
Jisung chuckles, but it comes out hollow. “Everyone thinks that, but it’s not true.”
It’s not true.
Jisung knows what alphas do when they want an omega and Minho hasn’t done any of those things for him ever. He’s not like Chan, who won a foxhunt to have Felix, or Changbin, who courted Hyunjin so aggressively he made their courtship the problem of every alpha, beta and omega on campus.
Jisung can’t even hope for a story like Seungmin’s, his best beta friend, who always scoffed in the face of relationship talk and rom-coms and still showed up with a freaking mating mark one day, introducing them all to Jeongin, the alpha he met at choir practice. Jeongin turned out to be the one who was responsible for the endless complaining Seungmin had done that semester because his note sheets and pencils and cardigans kept going missing. Their mating-at-first-sight ordeal had nearly sent Chan into cardiac arrest, but Jisung had seen the romance in it. Six months of stalking aside, Jeongin’s alpha had seen Seungmin’s beta and just went for it. It’s the type of direct approach Jisung can only dream of.
Even now, Jisung’s stomach pulls together with how badly he wishes for someone, anyone to want him that way. To want him, in the first place. It’s why he’s here, why he signed up for the foxhunt and why he’s going to go through with it.
“It’s not a mistake,” he says, squaring his shoulders now that he’s got his confidence back. “You picked me, right? I accept.”
Yeji studies him for a moment, her gaze still sceptical. Jisung can’t blame her for it because Minho just made a spectacle out of nothing, but then her shoulders relax and a smile takes over her features.
“Okay, great! We got so excited when we saw your name on the list, I was really hoping it wasn’t a fluke!” Her tone drops into something more conspiratorial. “I’m not supposed to tell you but there’s been a lot of sign-ups this year. We’re never without runners, but this is the highest number of contestants we’ve had since your friend Felix ran.”
Really? Jisung wants to ask, but Yeji is still talking,
“Because this is a university event, I need you to sign a couple more papers, mostly a more detailed sign-up form and a waiver in case a mating happens.” Which it always does, Jisung knows. “Can you come by the student council office this afternoon? Tomorrow is okay too if you’ve got class.”
Jisung nods. “I’ll swing by tomorrow.”
Yeji beams at him. “Great! I’ll see you tomorrow then?”
“Yeah.” Jisung gives her a thumbs-up. “Tomorrow.”
Yeji blows him a kiss before she leaves. Jisung just stands there, wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans before he slowly makes his way back. Changbin shoots up from his seat the moment he spots him.
“Jisung! This is a mistake, right? You told her she got the wrong guy?”
Jisung ignores him on his way back into the cafeteria. He frowns when he sees that their table is considerably more empty than before.
“Where is Minho?” he asks.
“He and Chan went for a walk,” Felix explains. The frown on his face is something Jisung ignores.
He’s hungry so he sits back down, pulling his tray (his own tray, this time) towards himself.
“Sungie—” Hyunjin starts, but Jisung cuts him off by raising his hand.
“Before you ask, yes, it’s true. Yes, I’m really going to run. I have thought about this and no, I’m not going to change my mind.”
“But—” Seungmin tries.
“There are no ‘but’s.” He meets his friends’ eyes. “I want an alpha. This is my best chance to get one.”
The faces of his friends tell him that not a single one of them is a fan of his plan, but there’s little they can say either. Even if they hardly treat him like one, Jisung is a full-grown adult. He gets to make his own decisions.
“Jisung,” Changbin says.
Jisung glares at him.
Unfortunately, Changbin isn’t the type to be silenced when he has something to say. Still, Changbin raises his hands in an offer of peace. “I’m not going to tell you not to do it, if being this year’s fox is what you really want. I just also want you to know that it’s never too late to change your mind.”
Jisung sighs, taking his time to chew before he responds, “I’ve tried everything else, Bin.”
“What do you mean?” Felix asks, still frowning.
Jisung sets his chopsticks down with a sigh. “I waited, okay? I waited to meet someone the normal way, maybe in one of my classes or at the library or somewhere. No one ever approached me and I don’t know why—”
Hyunjin and Felix exchange a nervous glance, which Jisung chooses to ignore at that moment. He really doesn’t want to hear it from them right now, happily mated to their alphas as they are.
“—but I got the message, all right? I lowered my expectations. Fuck, there was even a period of time when I left my shit lying around because I thought, well if no one at this university wants to meet me the normal way, maybe I can attract someone with a more…skewed approach.”
Jeongin’s ears turn red when Jisung jabs a finger in his direction. Case in point.
Seungmin promptly takes Jeongin’s hand under the table. “Don’t worry,” he whispers. “I liked it.”
Jeongin shoots his mate a sheepish smile, but Jisung can see the contentment underneath. His eyes flick to the mark on Seungmin’s neck for only a split second, but it does wonders to make him sit upright again. Jisung seethes with jealousy.
He turns his face away. “You may think I’m crazy for signing up for the hunt, but I don’t recall anyone here calling Felix crazy when he did it.”
“Well,” Hyunjin interrupts, “Felix kind of didn’t have a choice because of his family. Plus, he didn’t have—”
“I don’t care!” Jisung explodes. “I don’t care what you think! I tried getting a mate the normal way. I waited.” All of my life, I waited, he thinks bitterly. “I don’t want to wait anymore. You may be shocked to hear this, but Yeji told me there’s a lot of alphas who signed up to chase me. So there are at least a couple of alphas out there who want me and I’m going to get claimed by the strongest one.” Jisung puffs out his chest. “Someone who’s willing to fight to have me.”
“But is that enough to make you happy?” Felix asks.
“Is Chan enough to make you happy?” Jisung snaps back, regretting it immediately when Felix’s eyes turn wet. Jisung knows it’s not fair of him to treat Felix this way when Felix is only trying to help.
“I’m sorry,” he wants to say, should say, but the words get stuck in his throat. His appetite is gone so he pushes off the table.
“I’ve got class,” he mumbles before snatching up his bag and hurrying off towards the doors.
He knows he’s running away, but he can’t help it.
He’ll count it as practice for now.
*
Minho doesn’t come to lunch the next day.
Jisung tries to believe that it has nothing to do with him, but the six texts he sent Minho last night (three memes, a cute video of a kitten, a tentative question of whether they were still on for their movie night this Friday and finally just Minho?) have all gone unanswered. Jisung could still delude himself into thinking that nothing’s wrong, but the way Chan is looking at him from across the table tells him otherwise.
It’s not just concern in Chan’s eyes. There’s also this deep-rooted, borderline-confused sadness in his eyes that has little to do with the bruise blooming on his jaw. His pack alpha flinches every time Felix touches the purple swelling where he got caught by a more or less intentional fist.
Jisung kind of wants to cry looking at it.
He tries to tell himself that there’s no reason to be upset because he’s not responsible for Minho’s actions, but even he knows it’s bullshit. In the end, Jisung is just sad. When he imagined Minho’s reaction to the news he didn’t expect…this. They’ve known each other their entire lives, so Jisung knows Minho inside out. His best friend’s humour is skewed and he likes to threaten violence as a form of affection, but it’s all a fluke. He’s not violent by nature. At least, not on purpose.
Jisung caused this.
Chan waves off his apology before Jisung can even utter it, but that doesn’t make it right. Felix is not as forgiving as his mate. He’s shooting daggers at Jisung, not in anger but something eternally worse: an unmistakable order to fix it.
Unfortunately, Jisung isn’t the best at owning up to his mistakes, or making good choices for himself. And even if he wanted to, he doesn’t get the chance to confront Minho, because Minho doesn’t show up to lunch on Wednesday or Thursday either.
By the time Friday comes around, Jisung is on his thirty-third ignored text message and very tempted to show up at Minho’s dorm, but he’s been explicitly forbidden from coming anywhere near the alpha dorms, brimming with “horny unmated knotheads,” not only by Minho but by every alpha of his pack, so he stays away.
Even if it’s hard.
Even if he thinks that it might be worth it to sneak in just so he gets to see Minho’s face again.
It’s not right, is the thing. Save for the terrible year in which Minho left for university while he was still stuck in high school—and it was only one because Jisung knew weekend visits were not going to cut it so he spent an entire summer taking extra classes for gifted kids so he could graduate early—Jisung has spent almost every single day of his life with Minho. It’s unnatural for them not to be together, for there to be radio silence between them. Not talking is not something they do. Ever.
When Jisung was hoping for a reaction from Minho, he didn’t imagine this.
He knows by now that Minho is disappointed in him, not because he wants Jisung, but because he’s always hated the foxhunt, or any other type of mating run. Jisung is essentially joining an event that enforces the exact type of, in Minho’s eyes, omega-demeaning tradition his best friend has been preaching against ever since Jisung presented.
It leaves a bitter taste in Jisung’s mouth that well-meaning concern is really all it is Minho feels for him, but it’s also nothing he didn’t know before. Still, there’s a week left until the foxhunt. That’s enough time to make Minho do…something. Forgive Jisung for going through with it, if nothing else.
Jisung nods to himself.
He’s got a block seminar tomorrow morning, having chosen to sacrifice three of his Saturdays over having to stay two hours longer at university every Friday for the other option in the module, but afterwards he’ll go to Minho’s dorm. He’ll probably be late enough that all the unmated alphas usually festering in the halls are probably out partying.
His new resolve allows Jisung to finally relax a little. He’s too lazy (and honestly also too sad) to make dinner for himself, but he could finally get to the laundry piling on his desk chair.
He ends up on his bed instead, surrounded by pillows on three sides while he mindlessly scrolls through his social media accounts (pointedly not checking his messages again). It’s not late enough for him to go to sleep, but a little nap never hurt anybody.
When he wakes up again, it’s dark outside and there’s the repeated rasp of knuckles against his door. Groggily, Jisung rolls himself out of bed. He nearly eats shit when he trips over a hoodie on the floor. He’s still trying to get his foot out of the neckhole when he rips the door to his dorm room open.
Minho stares back at him.
Jisung nearly keels over with relief. “Minho!”
It’s only upon second glance that Jisung notices how tired Minho looks. His face is sunken in, his eyes dull where they usually sparkle with a teasing glint and the hood of his sweatshirt is pulled so deep into his eyes it nearly hides half his face.
Jisung blinks at him.
Minho raises the take-out bag in his hand. His knuckles are busted, but there’s no fight in his eyes. He didn’t come here to fight. He only looks tired. “Can I come in?”
Jisung opens the door wider and has to overcome the reflexive, instinctual urge to attach himself to Minho’s back. It’s what he normally would have done, but he’s not sure Minho would appreciate it at the moment.
It’s already such a concession that he came.
The happy, hopeful butterflies filling Jisung’s stomach die a quick death when Minho sniffs the air.
Jisung scoffs with disbelief. “What, you think just because I signed up for the foxhunt I’m going to invite random alphas into my room?”
Minho shrugs and that’s more of an insult than if he would have nodded.
“If you’re going to be like this, you might as well just leave!”
It’s eerily calm, the way Minho sets down the bag of take-out on Jisung’s desk before he turns around. He stares at Jisung, eyes black as tar before he blinks. Softens. All of him softens, from his eyes to the tension in his shoulders. Finally, he looks more like Minho again, even if it’s the saddest Jisung has ever seen him.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t—I know you wouldn’t do that.”
Jisung huffs, rubbing his own arms. “Knothead,” he mutters.
The corner of Minho’s mouth twitches.
Jisung feels distinctly like crying. Unfortunately, he’s never been able to keep those types of emotions inside himself.
“Come here,” he begs, dignity be damned. “Come here and hug me.”
Minho does. Of course, he does. Minho may not be his alpha, but he still always does what Jisung needs of him.
The moment Minho’s arms wrap around him, Jisung feels himself crumble. Minho may look like shit, but Jisung isn’t any better off. He hasn’t been sleeping either, too acutely aware of the Minho-shaped limb he was missing. “I missed you.”
“I’m sorry,” Minho says again, and Jisung is absolutely fine with pretending it doesn’t fall as flat as it does.
“Knothead,” Jisung accuses again.
Minho only holds him tighter. His nose finds the crook of Jisung’s neck and Jisung immediately cranes his neck, giving him more space. Minho scents him for minutes, seemingly making up for all the days he missed out on (days Jisung didn’t let anyone else scent him either) before he leads Jisung over to the food he’s brought.
They don’t talk about it. Not while they eat, not while they watch Cop and Copper on Jisung’s bed and not afterwards, when the takeout bag is left to stink up the hallway outside and Jisung’s laptop is safely placed back on his desk.
Then, it’s just the two of them, cuddled up under Jisung’s covers. Jisung’s basks in it, the feeling of Minho’s body spooned up behind him, the way their fingers tangle and untangle in an endless dance until Jisung’s so relaxed his eyelids are drooping again.
Jisung doesn’t have to ask whether Minho is going to stay over. It’s par for the course. Friday night hangouts are their time and no argument, no matter how big or small or foxhunt-shaped, is going to change that.
He’s almost asleep when Minho's voice rouses him once more.
“Jisung.”
“Mhm?”
“Drop out of the hunt.”
It’s not an order. Minho didn’t even attempt to speak to him in his alpha voice, but now he’s said it. He’s finally said it and now they are talking about it.
Jisung picks his reaction carefully. He tilts his head to the side. “Why?”
Minho’s lips brush over his scent gland. An accident, maybe. Minho inhales, exhales. Shaky. “It’s not what you want.”
No, Jisung thinks bitterly, it’s not what you want and still you’re not doing jack shit about it.
“You don’t know what I want, Minho.”
“I don’t?” It comes out as a growl. It fills Jisung with relief. Finally a challenge in Minho’s voice.
“I want a mate, Minho.”
The snap of teeth right by Jisung’s ear. “Why?”
“Why?” Jisung laughs. “Everyone wants a mate! Everyone has one! I don’t want to be left behind.”
“You’re not—” Minho blows air out through his nose. “That’s a terrible fucking reason to run, Jisung.”
Jisung only shrugs. “I want to do it all the same. Plus, it’s a great honour. Only the most coveted omega of their year gets to be the fox. This year, they picked me.”
“It’s not an honour to get chased through the woods until some random alpha finds you and fucks his claim into you, Jisung.”
Jisung gasps.
“You can still say no.” This time, it’s tinged with desperation. “Please, Jisung, you don’t—”
“I’m going to run, Minho.” Jisung knows it’s the truth the moment he says it.
It’s certainly not what he used to dream about when he was a freshly-presented omega imagining his future, but he knows it with certainty in that moment. He’s going to run, whether Minho likes it or not. Because the only thing worse than losing Minho over it is having to continue living in this limbo where the love of his life is right there, but still out of reach. At least, he’ll have clarity then. He’ll have a mate and a future that is set in its way.
Even if it doesn’t include Minho.
Much like Jisung expected, Minho doesn’t say anything in return. The arm he’s got draped over Jisung’s waist pulls him incredibly close, but that’s the extent of it. That is all Minho ever does. He holds him close and drowns him in his scent and never, ever talks about any of the feelings he may or may not have.
Despite the disappointment Jisung feels, it’s still easy to sink into it, the feeling of Minho’s body pressed up against him and the scent of woodsmoke enveloping him. He figures that it’s the familiarity that makes him feel safe.
It’s easy to give in to the feeling, certainly easier than arguing with Minho and so Jisung lets it pull him under. He’s learned by now that Minho isn’t going to be the one to save them, so why should he?
*
It’s maybe twenty minutes, maybe two hours when Jisung wakes up. It’s dark. Minho is a furnace behind him, keeping him warm and toasty. Jisung has woken up in this exact position hundreds of times before so he almost immediately sinks back under, but then he feels it.
There are teeth pressed against the sensitive skin of his neck, and it’s not the type of accidental graze that can happen in one’s sleep. No, Minho is awake and he’s got his teeth fastened around Jisung’s scent gland. He’s in the perfect position to bite.
Jisung stops breathing.
Minho could do it. Jisung was stupid enough to let him into his dorm room. There would be no talks of an unsolicited mating, no one would believe that Minho just claimed him without asking. They’ve been friends for too long. Half the campus thinks they’re dating already. Even Jisung’s parents wouldn’t believe him. His moms know him well enough to know what he dreams of.
That it’s Minho he dreams of.
Do it, Jisung thinks, by the moon, just do it.
Drool slides down his neck with how long Minho has been holding the same position, but then the softest sigh brushes across his skin. No teeth sink into his flesh. It’s Minho’s lips that press against his scent gland. The kiss is chaste. Jisung nearly chokes on the way it cracks him open. He doesn’t know what hurts worse, the knowledge that he got so close, or that even the prospect of losing him to another alpha isn’t enough to make Minho bite him.
It’s bitter, the defeat Jisung has to admit to himself.
He’s got a lifetime of pretending to be asleep when he shouldn’t be awake and so he doesn’t sob outright, but it’s not only Minho’s saliva that runs down his neck as silent tears escape from his eyes.
*
Jisung genuinely expects to wake up to an empty bed the next day, but Minho is still there. He is being uncharacteristically quiet, watching from the bed as Jisung gets dressed for class, but he didn’t leave. Jisung counts that as a win.
He counts it as a stupid sign to try again and say, “I know you think the foxhunt is stupid.”
Minho doesn’t flinch like Jisung expected him to. “It is.”
“I’m still going to do it.” It comes out sounding exactly like the petty, desperate, childish threat that it is.
Minho merely nods again. He looks…empty. Defeated, as defeated as Jisung feels.
Jisung hates it. A part of him hates Minho for not fighting harder, as hard as Jisung would have fought for him.
“You know…you could sign-up too.”
Jisung is a coward so he doesn’t stick around to see Minho’s reaction to his words. No, he slips out the door and then he’s on his way to class. He expects it when his phone stays silent, but it still hurts, almost as much as the lingering traces of Minho’s scent when Jisung comes back that night to an empty dorm room.
*
The official announcement of him being this year’s fox gets tacked to the cafeteria’s bulletin board the following Monday. It hangs there for exactly one afternoon before it gets ripped off. Nevertheless, Yeji messages him and tells him, surrounded by more pink heart emojis than Jisung has ever seen, that the alpha sign-up list has grown so much they had to close sign-ups early.
This is going to be the most successful foxhunt ever! she texts him.
Jisung is inclined to agree. When he goes to sleep that night, alone in his bed which only faintly smells like Minho anymore, he dreams of red eyes and fangs sinking into his neck and wakes up disappointed that none of it is true.
Not for long anymore, he tells himself. Soon enough, he’s going to run and someone is going to catch him. There has tobe someone out there who wants him badly enough to beat out every other eligible alpha on campus, who will put his teeth in his neck.
Jisung is finally going to have a mate, even if it may not be by the one he truly wants.