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Pomni knew she didn't need sleep in the circus, but it certainly helped. Everything about the bright, colourful rooms seemed eerie under the night's dark, grey filter. At least Caine made small stars twinkle on the roof. She dragged herself through the silent hall, past the cartoon faces of her friends and the people she hadn't met before. Pomni never looked too hard at the ones with big, red crosses across their faces and the night's dimness didn't allow her to see extra details in the abstracted characters.
She didn't know where to go. It seemed like every corner of the circus left her exposed to a vast space, almost asking something to pop up either behind or in front of her. Her steps echoed on the black and white, checked floor with a heaviness plaguing them with the dead of the night. Especially when she was alone, when there were no distractions, the truth that she was stuck in the circus, not even a real person, embedded itself into Pomni's brain and twisted like a dulling blade.
Wondering what was atop the large, red, spiral stairs was a brief distraction from her wonder. Pomni had asked the others what was up there, and they all said nothing much aside from a view of the downstairs floor. She climbed up the smooth steps. It wasn't like there was anything better to do while everyone was asleep. A quarter of the way up the staircase, memories of her old life poked through. Pomni remembered her mom's birthday was a couple of weeks since she first put the headset on. It would have passed since then, and Pomni wasn't there to celebrate it.
Halfway up, she noticed how high she was getting, with nervous pang in her stomach. The floor stretched out across her and the space simultaneously felt vaster yet smaller. She wondered what Caine did at night. Did he plan more adventures? Did he need to sleep as well? Pomni always assumed he workshopped adventures with Bubble. The thought of Caine watching them sleep poked at the back of her brain sometimes, but she ignored it. It didn't matter anyway, since she was an AI and he wasn't going to do anything.
The top of the stairs was just within view. She could see the gates of a small balcony poking over the steps. Reaching atop the staircase, Pomni was met with small piles of pillows across the single-coloured floor. It was some sort of light colour, but Pomni couldn't tell in the darkness. A figure hunched over at the edge of the wall. Jax was staring at the floor, tracking his finger up and down his shins.
Pomni stood at the top of the steps for a couple of seconds and internally debated whether she should have stayed or left. It was the first time they'd been alone since their fight, but the tension in the air had dissipated with her tired body as she didn't want to descend the stairs right after her trip. He'd been normal enough afterwards, aside from not really talking to Pomni during their adventures. Pomni knew better than to push the matter, knowing she didn't have the tact to change his mindset without causing a possible abstraction.
Jax's eyes seemed blank as they stared forward. She had been standing there for a while, so he would have noticed. Maybe she didn't need to push the issue - her mind was so shrouded in a fog of tiredness Pomni doubted she could have handled a deep talk. The last thing Pomni wanted to do was to go back to her room and stare at the roof, thinking about the horribleness of their situation.
"Hey Pomni," said Jax, still looking ahead.
Okay, he was talking to her. Good, it meant he didn't want her to leave. Pomni just needed to say something before he changed his mind. Literally anything. Why wasn't anything coming to her? She was just standing there like an idiot while Jax stared ahead of him.
"Did you want something?" he asked, mild irritation seeping through his question.
"N-no," Pomni forced out, a little awkwardly. She had to say more. "I just couldn't sleep and didn't wanna stay in my room otherwise..."
She trailed off. Pomni had said too much, especially alluding to not like being stuck in the circus. Instead of getting up or just plain ignoring her, Jax blinked slowly and sighed to himself.
"I get what you mean."
Pomni sidled over to him and sat down, close enough to comfortably talk but not so close that she'd accidentally touch his leg. A small wall of pillows cushioned the floor and wall, almost like she was sitting on a couch. They sat in silence for a moment, both staring out onto the circus floor below them. The couches they sat on looked so small, along with the entrance to the hallway.
"What do you think Caine gets up to at night?" asked Pomni. It was the only thing she could think of to ask. "He's probably planning out an adventure."
Jax hummed a laugh at the question. "Well, that moon's always flirting with him. They're probably up to something."
That was true. She'd even seen the moon flirt with him. Although, what could they even do if sex wasn't a thing in the Digital Circus?
"I thought Caine didn't know what sex was," said Pomni.
"Y'know, I thought that too. But then why would the moon be flirting with him all the time. And you mentioned something about Gloink reproduction once, right?"
Pomni shivered at the memory (which involved a lot more holes and slime than she expected). She never once questioned if the Gloink Mother enjoyed how she reproduced. Maybe they didn't have traditional forms of sex in the circus, but still had other ways to pleasure their bodies. When she looked at Jax out of the corner of her eye, Pomni noticed the slight mischievous gleam. She knew better than to question it.
"Why're you up?" she asked, willing to change the subject.
"Same reason you are. Can't stay in my room for too long."
He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. Jax's pupils widened again, putting a shield between him and Pomni and she knew whatever he was going to say next would have been completely false. At least it was a distraction.
"Just too boring," he sighed with a widening grin. "At least wandering at here means I'll run into some poor sucker. Now, just what to do with you."
Well, he already said and did the worst thing he could have done. Pomni could have stood anything after that. Despite overcoming the comment, the memories of that day still stirred within her and the words "I'd move on and probably forget about you" repeated in her head like the foreboding tolls of church bells. Maybe being alone with him was a bad idea. That sinking feeling she had in her room, when she ruminated on the events of that day, intensified sickeningly. She blinked forming tears away from her eyes, grateful for the darkness.
She didn't know how long they had been sitting in silence together, but she felt Jax's eyes peering at her cautiously. Pomni realised she was gripping her arms with her hands as if conforming herself. She let her arms go and let them slack at her sides, feeling exposed to Jax and the night.
"I didn't mean it," Jax muttered softly, but the sound slid swiftly through the silence and pricked at Pomni's ears.
"Mean what?" she asked. He said and did a lot of things that day and many of the days before. For all Pomni knew, Jax could have been feeling remorseful for one of the many times he picked on Gangle or for throwing her out of a truck.
"I wouldn't forget about you," he admitted, wrapping his hands around her knees.
"I know," said Pomni. "I wouldn't forget you either."
Jax snickered predictably, "Oh I know. My body is impossible to forget~"
"Oh yeah," Pomni drawled, playing along.
Just as expected, Jax's fur pricked up, and he squeaked slightly. His wide smile even faltered. He could sure dish it, but he couldn't take it.
"You still gunnin' for the straight couple?"
Pomni edged closer to him to intensify the game of chicken. She stretched her wiggled simper into a flirty smirk, staring daringly at Jax.
"Well, who could blame me?"
His body language was completely normal as nothing changed, but the surprised, short series of blinks gave him away completely. It was probably the first time someone even flirted with him in the circus. When he wasn't being a jerk, he did have that devilish confidence and that infectiously fun energy.
He leaned in close to Pomni, "You're not too bad yourself."
Pomni leaned in closer, not knowing if he was pretending. Either way, they were playing the same game with the same rules: say what they mean then regret it and say it was just a ploy to hurt the other. It wasn't bonding when the human didn't look like a human, apparently.
"I know."
She batted her eyes and stared at him, just like what she used to do to people in the real world. It almost always got her a drink. The actions and comments came too naturally to Pomni, who drank in every detail of Jax's face with her wide eyes. It looked like he was assessing Pomni too, his smile and pupils softening like he was being handed a newborn baby. Pomni's heart started speeding upon the realisation that that look of admiration wasn't pretend.
Jax snickered to himself, shaking his head.
"I'm too tired for this, Pom-pom."
"You should go back to bed. I won't throw pillows at you from up here," Pomni teased, nudging Jax's arm with her elbow. It was almost like things were back to normal.
He tilted his head to look up at the glowing stars on the roof. "Nah, I'll just chill up here."
Pomni leaned back against the wall, propped up by a pillow. Luckily, she was short enough for one pillow to cover her entire back. As she stared at the ceiling, Pomni thought about how she used to watch videos to help her sleep or how she'd watch TV as a distraction. There weren't even any books for entertainment.
"I'd kill for a radio," said Jax.
"Yeah."
They didn't know what to say next, but drowsiness had started to seep through Pomni's skin, making her muscles heavy. She wondered what Jax was thinking of as he stared forward. He'd be ready to tell her eventually and Pomni knew better than to push the matter. Nothing could catch her eyes in the night's stillness.
A shadow passed above the floor, floating above the doors. Caine's mouth turned over to them and he glided over, so quietly he was unnerving. Their ringmaster wore blue and white, striped nightgown with a drooping nightcap. With one click of his fingers, a lit candle in a brass holder appeared in front of them. Caine's smiling face was illuminated by a soft, yellow light that stretched to the pale floor and green pillows. The way it softly shone from Jax's fur made him appear smooth and calm in the light.
"Hello my chilly chooks," Caine said in a low, even voice. The excitement in his eyes was dimmed and replaced by calmness. "I see you're out of your rooms. Are they not to your liking?"
"No, no, they're fine," said Pomni. "Sometimes humans just need a change of scenery when we can't sleep properly."
Jax grimaced when she said "humans", before his wide smile returned. Well, he just had to deal with it because he was a human.
"I'd kill for a radio or TV or book or something though," said Jax.
"Well..." he said slowly. "I suppose I could compose some sort of radio show that lasts a couple of hours."
After some suggestions (and some sorts of negotiations), Pomni found herself left alone with Jax again. Night Mode Caine had left to create more radio stories and entertainment for everyone. He had left them with a colourful radio - with only a volume dial -, a large blanket which covered Pomni and Jax comfortably, some hot chocolates and a dim lamp. Pomni rested her finished hot chocolate mug to her side, noting the flavour tasted more like sugary milk than the hot chocolates in the real world.
"I'm just saying," a calm, male voice from the radio continued in their debate, "that the mannequins with accessories and clothes are inherently have more personality than plain ones."
"You see, I would have to disagree with that," said a woman from the radio. "An accessory gives the mannequin more of an opportunity to develop a personality based on what's its given, whereas everyone else had to start from scratch. The assumption that mannequins with accessories are born with more personality is what perpetuates this disparity and actually what stops people from giving us plain mannequins a chance.
"It just makes you seem ignorant of your circumstantial advantages," said Ming, his voice muffled by the speaker. "And now we all seem bigoted."
"Huh." Jax straightened in surprise. "Ming's in this debate."
"Shouldn't have assumed he wasn't," said Pomni, staring at the still radio.
She didn't know when it happened or for how long it had been happening for, but Pomni's body was resting against Jax's arm. He felt sturdy like a mattress she almost felt tempted to rest her entire head against. Jax breathed calmly and Pomni could see his smile relax out of the corner of her eye. His blinks were slow and that attentive watchfulness in his eyes had waned into a tired gaze.
The radio debate droned on and she felt a warmth press around her. Her heavy head lolled forward for a moment before she brought it back up, forcing her eyes open. She didn't know when they had closed. Sitting up, even against the soft pillow, started to make her upper back ache a little. Pomni adjusted herself to lay on her side and grouped the pillows so they were like a little bed. In her tired haze, Pomni rested her head on the tallest pillow, which propped her head above the warm blanket.
A couple of chattering voices echoed somewhere below her when she woke up. Pomni's hands were wrapped around a warm, pillow, almost like a giant teddy bear. Jax's slow breaths made his chest press against her face with every inhale. The blanket wrapped both of them together as if they were conjoined. Jax's arm rested heavily along Pomni's waist as if it belonged there. Pomni was too tired to question it, knowing only that she was enveloped in warmth and comfort. She nuzzled her face into Jax's chest and found a comfortable position just below his chin.
Jax held her closer and rested his head on Pomni's. They were intertwined like rope, but the most comfortable rope anyone had ever felt. Pomni felt herself sink back to that comfortable darkness, guided by the ups and downs of Jax's chest.
When she woke up again, she was flat on the floor, her head only slightly propped up by pillows. The abundance of soft comfort had disappeared as Pomni was only left with blankets and pillows. Jax's absence was instantly felt as she cracked her eyes open. The bright lights of the circus met her instantly, the colours popping out rudely. More talking sounded from below her with Ragatha's concerned voice rising above the rest.
Pomni forced herself upright and met the cold air. The pink blanket limply slid off her arms and rested at her feet. Just when she was about to wonder how long she had been alone, a slender shadow slid from the floor to the top steps, descending down the staircase. As soon as the tips of two ears as a shadow disappeared from her sight, Pomni knew Jax wasn't going to talk about it again. That was okay, as long as they could have another one of those nights.
yoslina_the_sinner Sun 07 Sep 2025 01:57PM UTC
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MishMishMish (Guest) Sun 07 Sep 2025 02:15PM UTC
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KorkDeservesBetter Sun 07 Sep 2025 10:15PM UTC
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