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Amy gripped her glass of Chardonnay tightly and glanced down at the floor of Selina’s living room. She had been working for the Senator for almost three years—next month was her work anniversary—and each day brought new challenges beyond her imagination. Selina already demanded 110% of Amy’s attention, but she had gotten even needier since her separation from Andrew, a sleazy businessman who made Amy’s skin crawl. Late nights at the office turned into late nights at Selina’s massive house in Chevy Chase, often just the two of them after Catherine went to bed. Sometimes Gary would be there too, but Amy got the Senator all to herself on a regular basis. She could tell Selina was lonely, although she would never admit it.
Warmth bloomed in Amy’s chest every time she thought about the fact that she was Selina’s chosen solution to her loneliness. What an honor! Amy had never been anyone’s favorite before. For most of the 25 years she’d been alive, she had been at best, an afterthought and at worst, excluded for “being too intense.” That didn’t bother Selina, though, who was stretched out horizontally on the couch with her legs over Amy’s lap. Amy’s free hand was perched cautiously on one of her legs. The physical affection was something else she had not often experienced before but got used to since coming to work for Selina. With Selina, it felt good instead of fake, like when family members tried to be affectionate with her, or disgusting, like when men she dated did.
The briefing for tomorrow’s vote on the National Parks Restoration and Resilience Act lay forgotten on the coffee table in front of them. Although it was supposedly important enough to warrant Amy coming over to review it again with Selina, they had only spent about 20 minutes on it before the Chardonnay made an appearance. Amy had tried unsuccessfully to steer Selina’s attention back to it twice already, and now she didn’t want to disturb her by moving her legs off of her lap to grab the papers from the table.
“Honestly, Ame, all I miss is the sex,” whined Selina, pausing to take a sip of her drink. “Having a husband fucking sucks. They’re lazy as shit and leave messes everywhere they go, but god, was it good to get laid whenever I wanted it…”
Amy didn’t know what to say to that. To her, sex was the most overrated thing on earth. Letting some man between her legs so she could continue to say she had a boyfriend if her family asked was a chore on par with cleaning the bathroom. It never felt good enough to want. In fact, she was pretty sure the concept of orgasming had been made up entirely. Amy didn’t care if she went the rest of her life without ever having a dick inside of her again.
She must have been making a face that betrayed her feelings, though, because Selina frowned. Selina stared at her for a moment, eyes narrowed and wine glass lowered. Amy’s heartbeat sped up. Telling other people she didn’t enjoy sex was always difficult and embarrassing. Selina wouldn’t shy away from making fun of her, either.
“What’s wrong?” asked Selina. “Are you as prudish as you dress?”
“No, ma’am,” said Amy, even though she probably was.
“You never talk about having a boyfriend or getting laid at all, though.”
“Uh, I don’t think it’s appropriate for us to discuss that.”
“Aww, come on, Amy. It’s just some girl talk with my favorite girl.”
Being called Selina’s “favorite girl” or any similar variants always made Amy blush. She felt strange and floaty every time. Selina scooted closer, amplifying the feeling. Amy took a long drink of her Chardonnay to delay having to speak.
“I don’t do that, ma’am. Any of that.”
Selina gasped. “You’re a fucking virgin?”
“No, I just hate it. I hate meeting men and pretending I’m interested in whatever dumb bullshit they say.”
“Yes, they’re dumber than dog shit, but you don’t think the sex is worth it?”
Feeling uncomfortable, Amy downed the rest of her drink in one gulp. Her cheeks burned worse than the alcohol sliding down her throat. She didn’t want to talk about this, but she doubted Selina would let it go.
“No. It’s just fine, I guess, but I don’t see what the big deal is. Getting recognized for doing a good job at work literally feels better than sex.”
Selina almost spit her drink back into the glass. She sputtered as the wine went down hard. Amy could tell she was barely choking back a laugh, and the humiliation was all-consuming. Not wanting to hear whatever Selina had to say about that, Amy continued to ramble.
“Sometimes it hurts, and I don’t— Every time I’ve been with a guy, uh, I never…” Amy’s voice trailed off. She couldn’t even look at Selina. “Ma’am, are orgasms real?”
No longer able to contain herself, Selina burst into laughter. Amy set her empty glass down on the table. Hot tears pricked at the corners of her eyes. Selina was laughing at her for the same reason all her female friends had laughed at her for years. She didn’t belong here either.
“Oh, stop crying!” Selina put her glass down too and moved off of Amy’s lap, repositioning herself so she could pat her shoulder. “Yes, orgasms are real, and you’d be a lot less tense if you had one.”
“But I can’t have one. I’m basically broken.”
Selina cupped her cheek and wiped away the tears that threatened to fall. Amy whimpered, feeling her wine and wishing sex didn’t exist. Why did people have to talk about it all the time, anyway?
“Hey, look at me.”
Amy did as she was told.
Selina smiled and pulled her hand away. “Don’t get all offended at what I’m about to say, okay?”
“Yes, ma’am.”
“I’ve gotten to know you pretty well over the past few years, and I honestly think what you need is a woman’s touch. I went to Smith, so I can recognize some of the signs.”
Amy’s eyes widened. She couldn’t tell if the room was spinning because of the alcohol or because of her anxiety. What career-destroying thing was Selina accusing her of?
“I—”
“Hush, Amy, I’m not done. All my attempts to get you to meet some of the nice boys in other Senators’ offices have gone over your head. You don’t give a fuck at all. Also, last week, you mentioned how when you were 12, you kept a folder under your bed full of magazine cutouts of Elaine from Seinfeld like it was normal. Sorry, but that’s gay as shit, Amy. I catch you staring at me all the time, and she was basically just a less hot version of me!”
“I’m not gay,” sniffled Amy.
“I wouldn’t be so sure. What if you let a woman touch you and squirted your fucking brains out?”
Amy didn’t know what that meant, and she was afraid to ask. Her heart hammered against the wall of her chest. Her childhood friends did think her Elaine folder was weird, even though they all had New Kids on the Block posters hanging up in their rooms for everyone to see. And a lot of what was terrible about sex specifically had to do with a hairy, sweaty man on top of her. It didn’t sound quite as disgusting with someone more her size, who didn’t have a thick beard scratching her skin. Women didn’t smell as bad, anyway. She could have sniffed Selina’s perfume for hours.
“But I can’t be gay, ma’am, America won’t… What if you ran for President someday with a gay campaign manager? I’d ruin it for you in like, half the states.”
“Well, of course you can’t come out until it starts polling well, but you do realize I already think you’re gay, and you’re still my Amy.”
Selina pulled her close, and Amy rested her cheek on her shoulder as she often did when they were alone. At least that didn’t have to change. How could Selina call her gay, though? Of course, it was 2006 and that was no longer supposed to be an insult, but the possibility had still never crossed Amy’s mind. She didn’t even know any gay people, and it would heavily impact her career in politics. The haze of the wine and the comforting floral scent of Selina’s perfume quieted her thoughts. She could have fallen asleep there if Selina let her.
“Or maybe you’re not gay after all,” continued Selina. “I mean, I’m not a dyke, but I still love getting women off sometimes.”
Amy sat bolt upright. She almost jumped off the couch as she widened the distance between her body and Selina’s. Selina in bed with a woman was beyond Amy’s comprehension. The air in the room suddenly felt thick and hot, like she had a fever. The wine was probably getting to her.
“You what?”
“Again, I went to Smith, Amy. I was very popular. Selina Eaton wasn’t just my unmarried name.” Selina reached over and squeezed Amy’s thigh hard, digging her nails in. “I’ll make sure you never work in D.C. again if you tell anyone, though.”
“Noted.”
Selina squeezed her thigh again, this time with soft affection. “Good girl.”
The wine was definitely getting to Amy. As soon as those words left Selina’s lips, her stomach flipped, bringing a strange heat with it as it re-settled. Amy’s lower half had never felt like that before. Maybe the feeling was specific to being wine drunk, although she hadn’t consumed any more than usual.
Selina grabbed her wine glass off the table and finished the rest of her drink. Amy couldn’t tear her eyes away from the way her lips curled around the rim of the glass. No one else had ever had such perfect, inviting lips. The odd heat she was feeling intensified, and she crossed her legs tight to distract herself.
“What’s wrong? You have nothing to worry about if you don’t spill my secret.” Selina laughed and rubbed Amy’s upper arm. “You’re so tense… which you wouldn’t be if you got fucked.”
Amy crossed her legs even tighter. Her underwear had begun to feel damp, which mortified her for a second, even though she didn’t have to go to the bathroom. Then, she remembered that was supposed to happen when women got turned on. Was she turned on?
Selina put her empty glass down again and moved in closer. She moved with a sloppy giddiness that Amy only saw when she had gotten a little too much Chardonnay in her system. An arm settled around Amy’s shoulders again, and Selina’s lips brushed up against her ear. Selina’s hot breath tickled the delicate skin, sending electric waves down Amy’s spine.
“I think you should try a really experienced woman. Just once.”
Selina was propositioning her. Selina fucking Meyer was propositioning her, and Amy was about to leave a wet spot on her $5000 couch because of it. For the first time in her life, Amy actually hoped someone would reach for the buttons on her shirt. Selina grinned, waiting for Amy’s reaction. Unable to stop herself, Amy turned her face and closed the gap between their lips. Her hand drifted upwards to cup Selina’s cheek as she tasted the fruitiness of the Chardonnay mixed with the waxiness of her lipstick. Every nerve felt like it was on fire. Selina’s lips were every bit as soft and inviting as they looked. The entire experience was lightyears beyond kissing some guy’s dry, chapped lips, and Amy went in for another.
“Ma’am, do you want to take me upstairs?” asked Amy, gathering up all the courage she could muster.
“Fuck yeah, I do.”
Selina practically hopped off the couch, then pulled Amy up with her. She intertwined their fingers and began leading her up the winding staircase. Amy couldn’t decide whether she was excited, terrified, or both. For the first time in her life, she actually needed someone to take care of the ache between her legs. She paused halfway up the stairs to kiss Selina again.
Doing this didn’t have to mean she was gay. Selina had caused the ache, so it was only fair that she took care of it. Plus, Selina was the most captivating woman Amy had ever met. If sex with her turned out to suck as bad as it did with guys, that meant she wasn’t gay after all. It made perfect sense to her wine-addled brain, which was not interested in processing the full implications of having sex with her boss. All she knew was that she loved Selina, she trusted Selina, and Selina was the only person who had ever made her underwear wet. She could deal with the consequences in the morning.
As soon as they reached the privacy of Selina’s bedroom, Amy found herself shoved up against the wall. Selina’s tongue roamed her mouth while her hands roamed Amy’s chest, making quick work of her shirt buttons. Selina paused to switch the lights on. Figuring it was a mistake, Amy switched them off again. Selina drunkenly giggled against her lips and turned the lights back on.
“No, Amy, I want to look at you.”
Amy had never done it with the lights on. She preferred to have the room as dark as possible and hide under the covers, so she wouldn’t have to see the men or let them see her. Her shirt fell to the floor, and Selina reached for the clasp of her bra, sparking a brand new sense of shyness. Usually, she felt cornered once her clothes started coming off, but this time, she just hoped Selina liked what she saw.
The cold air hit Amy’s bare chest, perking up her nipples. Selina’s eyes darkened with desire as she gazed down at Amy’s breasts. Then, she cupped them and started to kiss down Amy’s neck. Selina used the right amount of pressure as she teased her nipples, unlike all the clumsy guys who had just pawed at them. Amy moaned softly. Wanting to reciprocate, she reached for Selina’s shirt, only to have her hand pushed away.
“Let me teach you first so you don’t ruin it,” said Selina, breaking the kiss.
“Oh, of course. I’m so sorry.”
Selina flashed another grin, then bent down and took one of Amy’s nipples in her mouth. Amy arched her back against the wall, unable to contain herself. The wet heat felt divine against the delicate skin. Fuck, Selina’s mouth was incredible.
Amy barely noticed her skirt being unzipped until it fell down when Selina started guiding her over to the bed. Careful not to trip, she stepped out of it, revealing plain white underwear that she had soaked nearly translucent. Selina was sure to tease her for making such a mess already.
Selina pushed Amy down onto the thick, plush mattress, which felt a thousand times better on her tense back than the ancient one she had taken out of her parents’ guest room. She straddled her and let her hands fall on her breasts again, absentmindedly rubbing and teasing them as she stared down at Amy like she was a three-course meal. Amy’s heart continued to race.
“You’re so pretty under all that business casual.” Selina pressed her own pussy hard against Amy’s torso. “I could just eat you up.”
Amy wanted to beg, but the words died in her throat. She looked up at Selina, eyes wide and full of desire. When would she stop teasing and get on with it?
Selina seemed to hear Amy’s silent prayer and moved off of her. She settled back down between her legs, making Amy part them even wider, and touched the soaked-through crotch of her underwear.
“Aww, are you excited?”
“Y-Yes, ma’am.”
“I bet.”
Selina traced the outline of the wet spot. Amy whimpered and writhed, bucking her hips in a desperate attempt to meet the other woman’s hand. She needed this like her next breath of air. Then, finally, Selina began to peel the soaked underwear off. A light blush crept up Amy’s cheeks as she realized it was sticking to her body. It deepened once the underwear was on the floor, exposing her fully to a still-clothed Selina without darkness or blankets as a buffer. She never let anyone look at her like this in bed, and god, was Selina looking. Selina would never leer and drool because it was undignified, but Amy could tell she wanted to. She almost left the mortal coil when Selina spread her completely open with her fingers to get a better view of what she had done to her.
“Ma’am…”
“Don’t be shy, Ame. I think this is a big fucking compliment.”
Selina trailed a finger through Amy’s wetness, then dragged it back up over her clit. It was the single best physical sensation Amy had ever felt. Her body screamed for more. They had barely gotten started, and Amy couldn’t believe how much she had been missing out on. She didn’t have to wait long. Selina rubbed the side of her clit in slow strokes with a careful finger.
“What are you going to do?” asked Amy, struggling to force the words out.
“Tease you a little,” replied Selina. She pressed her finger against Amy’s most sensitive area and laughed when she cried out. “Then eat you out until you’re crying and pledging your loyalty to me for the next 20 years.”
“I’ve never done that before.”
“What!?”
Amy found it hard to feel embarrassed about her sad sexual history while Selina’s hand was between her legs. She helplessly ground herself into Selina’s touch, needing her to stop teasing her and take care of the horrible, all-consuming ache. It was true that no one had ever eaten her out, though. She would have never dreamed of letting any of those disgusting men put their scratchy mouths on that part of her body.
“I always just lay there and let them hump me while I responded to my texts. There was none of that. Ever. Why would there have been?”
“Jesus Christ, no wonder you hate sex. That’s the saddest shit I’ve ever heard in my life. Spread ‘em wider.”
Amy obeyed. Selina repositioned herself and grabbed a thigh, pressing a kiss to the soft skin. She ran her tongue up the trail of sweat and arousal, then stopped to kiss Amy again when she got to the crease between her leg and her body. Amy gripped the sheets until her knuckles went white when she felt Selina’s breath tickle her.
Then, Selina’s lips were on her, and Amy nearly fell off the bed. Her fingers were the best thing Amy had ever felt two minutes ago, but her tongue set a new record. Amy knew she’d be reprimanded if she messed up Selina’s hair by putting a hand on her head, so she continued to grip the sheets to keep herself grounded. She closed her eyes and tried not to think too much about how Selina’s entire face was down there. Before Selina started coming onto her, this was something Amy had thought she’d never let anyone do.
Part of her was glad Selina didn’t dive right in— there was no way she could have handled that. Gentle licks in the vicinity of her clit helped her acclimate to the wildly foreign sensation. The first swipe of Selina’s tongue over it drew a shrill moan out of Amy. She clamped one hand over her mouth, terrified that she’d wake up Catherine and be asked to leave. Selina didn’t seem bothered, though, and did it again and again. Amy could hardly catch her breath.
Just when Amy thought it couldn’t get any better, Selina took the sensitive bud into her mouth and sucked lightly. Overcome with the intense pleasure ripping through her body, Amy ground her pussy against Selina’s face. Selina did it again, this time for a bit longer, then pulled away. Amy kept her eyes closed and hoped her disappointment wasn’t obvious.
“Mmm, Amy,” Selina hummed, letting the vibrations dance against the most sensitive part of Amy’s body. “So fucking good.”
“Please…”
Selina kissed her inner thigh again. “When I think you can handle it.”
“Ma’am, please,” Amy begged, unable to stay still.
She tried once again to press her pussy against Selina’s face to signal it needed more attention. Selina put a hand over it and pushed Amy back down on the bed. Amy still couldn’t bear to open her eyes, but she knew Selina was probably giving her a pitying smirk. A teasing finger brushed over Amy’s clit.
“God, you’re needy for someone who says she hates sex.”
“I don’t hate it with you, ma’am.”
“Of course not.” Selina swiped at her clit again. “No one does.”
The teasing was too much to handle. Part of Amy wanted to cry. The other part of her wanted to grab Selina’s face and grind against it until the ache went away.
“I, uh… I…”
“Look at me and use your words, Amy,” commanded Selina, her voice stern with a hint of softness. “You can do it.”
Amy powered through the shyness she had been feeling and opened her eyes. The sight of Selina’s face between her thighs almost knocked her out. Her clit throbbed, reminding her of what she needed to do.
“I need you to fuck me with your mouth.” Amy’s words tumbled out in a filthy whine shriller and needier than she ever could have imagined. “Please.”
“Oh, so obedient.” Selina rewarded her with a kiss just above her clit.
Selina’s praise lit a whole new fire in Amy’s core. Amy squirmed underneath her with every teasing kiss and slow lick, until finally, Selina pinned her hips down and took her clit back into her mouth. The fire burned hotter and hotter until a burst of pleasure unlike anything Amy had ever felt extinguished it. She screamed Selina’s name, forgetting she wasn’t allowed to call her anything except “ma’am.” Selina didn’t seem to be offended, but she did respond by continuing to suck on Amy’s clit through her orgasm until she was a sweaty, sobbing, fucked-out mess.
Selina stretched out next to Amy on the mattress. As soon as Amy regained her senses, she curled up into her side without a word and buried her face in Selina’s chest. She clung to her, trying to process the way her entire world had just changed.
Orgasms were real, and she was so fucking gay.