Chapter Text
Dick has no idea how all of this could've gone so terribly wrong. He had been investigating this case for a week now, so when he finally found the location of the Riddler, he was thrilled to get this nerve-racking mess of a case over with. But he had also been self aware enough to understand that going against the Riddler alone might be a bad idea, hence he asked Jason to come along.
A request he now deeply regrets as his eyes open ever so slightly - fighting against a headache that he knows will be troubling him for a while - and his still softly unfocused gaze lands on his brother.
Jason is no longer wearing the big Red Hood mask but at least the black mask over his eyes is still in place. He's sitting upright - Dick only now realizes that he is laying sideways - and seems to struggle against mental handcuffs.
Still very out of it, Dick carefully tries to move his hands but quickly he realises that it's no use. But then again it would have surprised him if Jason was handcuffed and he wasn't.
He blinks through the dim green light - still a bit disoriented - and tries to take in their surroundings. It seems like a cellar of sorts. Everything is out of metal and the floor is cold beneath his body. He can't find any windows or other entrances beside the large metal door next to them.
“Finally,” Jason mutters and Dicks gaze moves back to his brother, whose eyes are now locked on him. Carefully Dick maneuvered himself into an upright position, closing his eyes for just a second to battle the headache. “Took you long enough.”
The older one simply groans in response and fights the need of brushing through his hair or massage his temples. Still he tries to sit a bit more upright, focusing his gaze on Jason. He doesn't need his brother to see that he hit his head pretty badly, wouldn't change anything right now anyways.
“First you drag me into this mess and the next thing I know we're both handcuffed in some cellar, who knows where. Really good job boy wonder.” Dick simply raises his eyebrow at Jasons rant and titles his head a bit to his side. He knows that the other one is simply frustrated and getting under his skin is an easy outlet, but they do not have time for that.
“Well excuse me for asking you to help me on a difficult case,” he still mutters back sarcastically though and rolls his eyes behind his mask, knowing very well that Jason will interpret the movement of his mask correctly. “My bad for trusting you I guess.”
“Yeah, great call.” Though Jason snorts in response, Dick knows that his anger isn't directed at him personally but rather the situation as a whole - which is beyond understandable in all honesty. He himself also doesn't quite picture brother bonding time as being held captive.
But before Dick has the opportunity to respond, there is a loud beep echoing through the room that lets him flinch softly. “Welcome Nightwing and Red Hood, such a pleasure to have you as my guests today,” the voice of the Riddler echoes through the room, which makes it nearly impossible to track its source. “Really I've been dying to finally get to know the two of you better.”
“Oh fuck off,” Jason responds immediately, letting his head roll back in an annoyed manner. Dick shares the sentiment but only lets out a dragging and heavy sigh. He also is in no mood for any of Riddler's theatrics.
“Well that's not nice,” the teasing voice rings through the room, “but oh well, you're not a man of big words hm?”
“What do you want?” Dick exclaims annoyed and closes his eyes for a moment again. The echoing of the words is worsening his headache by large and he'd prefer the green maniac to shut up as quickly as possible. In the corner of his eye, he sees Jason watching him closely, so he forces his eyes open again. He needs to be strong for him.
The Riddler lets out a sound that vaguely resembles something like a disappointed ‘Tsk’ which even lets Jason cringe slightly at how terrible it sounds through the speakers. “You two are no fun but what do I expect talking to such tragically simpler minds?”
Jason and Dick simply share a look. No words or gestures. Just a look and both can immediately tell the annoyance of the other one. Dick bites back a comment, not wanting to hear more of that horrible speaker and is glad when Jason also simply raises his eyebrow at the remark.
After a beat of silence, the voice returns. “Alright I see no interest in a little chit-chat, then let's move along. The game is simple, answer all my riddles correctly and you will get your freedom, isn't that so kind of me?”
“How lovely,” Dick mutters but now he knows that he needs to concentrate. Riddlers riddles can differ between weirdly easy, extremely difficult and impossible. He notices Jason's body also tensing softly and although he feels bad for dragging his little brother into this mess, right now he is more than glad to have him at his side.
“I know right? Well then, riddle me this: When you don't know what I am, I am something, but when you know what I am, I am nothing. What am I?”
Theoretically Dick should be glad for the silence that follows but his mind is too busy trying to figure out the Riddle. And not for the first time since working on the case, he questions why he didn't ask Tim for any help. He'd probably have that riddle solved in seconds.
“Such bullshit,” Jason mutters more to himself than actually Dick or the Riddler and Dick can see the wheels turning in his head. The riddle probably isn't even that hard but his analysis skills are currently useless against the headache. Softly he shifts over to the next wall and rests his head against it. The cold somewhat helps but doesn't help him sharpen his thoughts further. Come on Dick, think!
“A riddle…” Jason whispers suddenly and Dick cracks one of his eyes open to look at his brother. A riddle…? The longer he thinks about it, the more logical it seems and he lets out a relieved breath. He knew asking Jason for help was the right decision. If there is one person he can always count on, it's his younger brother - without a doubt.
“A Riddle!” Said brother repeats much louder again and both of them hold their breath as they wait for Riddler's answer.
“That is correct, well done Red Hood.” With that the metal handcuffs around their wrists suddenly fall off and the giant door next to them opens smoothly. For a second neither of them moves, simply staring at the hallway in front of them. Fuck. This place is more huge than he guessed. “Go to the next room for the next riddle. You're one step closer to freedom already.”
“Come on Goldie,” Jason mutters as he pushes himself up but before Dick can attempt to get up, his brother is standing in front of him, offering him a hand. Gratefully he takes it and pushes himself up. For a second the whole room seems to swing but Dick overplays it. “You’re good?”
“Naww are you worried about me?” Dick teases instead of answering the question, which earns him an annoyed huff in response. He grins slightly at that and starts heading out of the room. “Oh shut up dickface.”
Once they followed the long hallway for a while, they arrive in a new room. It looks just like the last one, though this one has a table with a box on it in the middle. In the back of the room is another door, heavy metal and probably nothing they can smack open with their shoulder - much to Dicks displeasure.
He is the first of the two to enter the room but once Jason does so as well, the door behind them closes with in swift but loud motion. Both of them immediately snap their heads around to face it and Jason quickly smacks his hand against it. “Shit.”
“Don’t punch it,” Dick mutters before he can stop himself, looking at the younger one with his ‘big brother’ stare, as Tim likes to call it. “There's no use and I don't need you to injure yourself.” Even with the mask on, he can see Jason raising his eyebrow.
“Well and I suppose you have a better idea then Goldie?” Jason narrows his eyes ever so slightly and leans against the door for just a moment, before pushing away from it and walking over to Dick, who's standing at the table.
“Working on it,” Dick mutters, resting his hands on the table in front of him. Something about the box on the table doesn't sit right with him. It's obviously locked but he is certain that whatever this box contains will be important in this whole mess at some point.
He can see Jason's lips twitch like he is about to say something but he's interrupted by Riddler's voice. “You've made it to the second room, how exciting.”
Dick winces softly at the nasty sound of the speaker, his head pounding even more. In the corner of his eyes, he can see Jason's piercing eyes on him, so he tries to brush it off. “You’re a terrible liar, you know?”
“Oh shut it,” Dick responds at Jason's teasing recall of his question earlier and straightens his shoulders automatically. It's not that he doesn't trust Jason - he does so blindly - but he doesn’t want to be seen as weak.
And especially not by his siblings. He is the oldest, they should always be able to rely and count on him. He should be the one protecting them and be there to help them through every issue life may throw at them. So there is no room for showing weakness. He's their protector and so he needs to be strong for them, that's just who he and his role is.
“Uh yes little birdie hit his head I remember,” Riddlers voice echos through the room again, almost as if he is offended that neither brother is giving him any attention whatsoever. That at least brings a satisfied smirk to Dicks face. “Well hopefully your head is good enough to solve the new riddle, hm?”
“Of course it is.” Theoretically speaking he knows it's useless to jump at the bait but he can't hold back the comment. Who does this guy think he is? He is very much capable of figuring out a riddle, thank you very much.
“Alright then, if you say so. Riddle me this: I’m the revealer of masks, when I appear, friend becomes foe, and the one that you love becomes the one that you hate. What am I?”
For a moment Dick simply stares at the table in front of him. This one seems a bit harder than the last one. Carefully he takes a deep breath to calm his nerves down. He's a detective, he can solve this.
He glances at Jason. His brother is standing on the opposite side of the table, eyes narrowed as well and hands rested on the table. He releases a soft sigh after a few seconds. “You got anything?”
Jason looks up, raising his eyebrow. “Do you think I'd be quiet if I did?” Dick rolls his eyes at the mocking - since it's really not the place right now - but can't help the smirk that tugs at his lips.
“I'm the revealer of masks…” Nightwing softly mutters, pushing his hair back with a hand. For a split second Dick had been scared that the riddle somehow would reveal that the Riddler knows their real identities but as of right now that luckily doesn't seem to be the case.
As he stares at the box in front of him, like it could grant him the answer, he sees Jason titling his head slightly in the corner of his eyes. “I think you're focusing on the wrong part.”
“What do you mean?” Dick looks up a bit confused, analyzing his posture. All mockery has vanished from his brother's feature and has made place for that spaced out look Jason has when concentrating. Jason simply shrugs.
“The mask doesn't seem to be the essential part, more like a metaphor used to underline the following statement.” A smirk tugs at Dicks lip but he holds it back. He sometimes almost forgets that, although Jason speaks Gotham-Street-slang, he is a very well read person. Of course he'd immediately notice that.
“Yeah could be…” he acknowledges with a little grin but lets it fall as he picks at the next part of the riddle. “Friends to foes and love to hate… Could be a lot of things honestly.” In all honesty he is starting to get frustrated with how slow his mind seems to be working.
“Time maybe,” Jason suggests with a shrug. “Over time a friend can become a foe and emotions can quickly change.” Dick hums at the reasonable approach but somehow it doesn't feel exactly correct. Sure, time can reveal masks and Jason's argument seems reasonable but he can't help but think that there is a bigger picture he's not seeing yet.
“Not a bad idea but I think the question here is the why,” Dick suggests meeting his brother's eyes at the conclusion he's just drawn. Time doesn't go deep enough for a Riddler riddle. After all there is always a ‘why’ to why things or people change over time - he and Jason should know.
Jason hums in response. “You mean why a friend becomes a foe?” Dick nods and he can almost see Jason coming to the same conclusion as him. After a few seconds Jason pushes his hair back and then nods agreeing.
“Yeah I guess you could be right, but there are many possibilities for that,” Jason crosses his arms again, looking vaguely annoyed. “Having different opinions, getting into a fight,... the list is endless.”
“Mhm true…” Dick mutters in agreement and softly massages his temples. Jason is right, the possibilities are endless. But there must be an umbrella topic that connects all of this. Something that gives a why and also matches the mask revealing metaphor.
“Its probably something that all of these things have in common. Like an emotion or a bigger sentiment,” Dick offers his attempt at an explanation and Jason hums absently. For a moment Jason looks at the box again, deep in mind, before returning his gaze to meet Dicks eyes.
“So theoretically an emotion or feeling so strong that it turns friend to foe. Something that hurts so severely that even love can become hate. Something like-”
“Betrayal,” both of them say at once and lock their eyes. Dick first thought about it possibly being truth but the way Jason explained it just now left no room for anything else then betrayal.
The two of them grin at each other and Dick even reaches out a hand and softly places it on his little brother's shoulder. “Good job little wing, still a detective to the core hm?”
Jason rolls his eyes at the affectionate teasing but - much to Dicks pleasure - the grin doesn't dissappear from his face. No he still grins, only muttering a quiet ‘Asshole’ in response.
Dick grins only grows but before he can say anything, the Riddler's voice echoes through the room again - reminding them painfully of his presence.
“Good job, I knew not to underestimate the bats.” Dick can hear the grin in the Riddler's voice and a little shiver runs down his spine as his features grow from affection to annoyance. Right, he almost forgot that asshole.
He can also feel Jason tense again and after squeezing once softly, he lets his hand drop from his shoulder, straightening his own shoulders. “Yeah, would be a pretty stupid thing for you to do.”
“I am incapable of doing anything stupid!” Dick grins slightly at the offended tone of the Riddlers voice and he can see Jason's lips twitch as well. “Now I almost feel bad about how easy I made all of this for you.”
“Well that's on you asshole,” Jason responds and crosses his arms. “Now hurry up, I still have stuff to do today.” Dick's grin only widens till he suddenly hears a mechanical hiss coming from the box on the table. A little frown appears on his face but before he can investigate the contents, he gets interrupted by the Riddler once again.
“I'm feeling particularly generous today so if you manage to solve and execute this riddle, this door will open and you are free,” the Riddler explains but instead of feeling optimistic relief, an uneasy feeling runs down his spine. Something is not adding up, this is way too easy.
He exchanges a look with Jason and he can tell that his brother is also not really convinced by the Riddlers ‘generosity’. Dick takes a deep breath and closes his eyes for just a second, before opening them more focused again. “Alright then let us hear it.”
"Oh gladly, but first I gotta give you all the details, wouldn't be fair otherwise right?” The teasing only lets Dicks unease increase but he doesn’t say anything else, waiting patiently. Jason lets out a little groan and mutters, “Get to the point, will ya?”
“Well firstly, for answering the last riddle correctly, you unlocked the contents of this pretty little box, which will be necessary for executing this riddle's answer. Only open it after hearing the riddle though.” Dick hums more to himself than to the Riddler. He already guessed that it would be important but it still surprises him that the Riddler willingly gave them a clue to solve this. Doesn’t seem much like him.
“Secondly, since I don't wanna make it too easy, you have ten minutes to solve this riddle. If you fail to do so, the both of you will die from the gas that will start leaking into this room from now on.” There is a metallic hiss again and Dicks eyes wide ever so slightly. Of course the Riddler wasn't just being generous, that would have been too easy.
Jason and him share a glance again and he tries to give his brother a reassuring smile. Yeah the circumstances have just gotten a whole lot worse but they solved the last riddle together pretty quickly. He just needs to get over this headache and focus, then they'll surely solve this riddle quickly and be on their way home.
“Alright, now it was really so much fun playing with both of you, I gotta admit. But everything must come to an end right? Well riddle me this: Two to enter, none may part, unless one stills a beating heart. The door will yield, the lock will bend, when one begins and one must end. What needs to be done?”
A cold shiver runs down Dicks spine as the speaker goes quiet with a simple click. Silence returns to the room, thick and heavy, except for the sound of his and Jason's breathing hearts.
Dick closes his eyes again, shaking his head. This can't be true. This can't be the reality he is facing right now. Because for once the impossible part about this riddle isn't to solve it but to execute it. After all, the words couldn't be simpler.
Unless one stills a beating a heart.
The implication is so obvious Dick would have to be blind and deaf to miss it.
The door will yield, the look will bend [...] and one must end.
The Riddler wants them to kill each other. And as his eyes wander to the box, which he carefully opens with shaking hands, he sees how they are supposed to kill the other one.
In the box are two simple black handguns. The same model as far as Dick can tell and he feels sick to his stomach. Like he is actually about to throw up all over to place by the mere thought of this suggestion.
That asshole wants for either Dick or Jason to shoot the other one. He wants Dick to shoot his baby brother or Jason to shoot him. That's just fucking sick.
“Son of a bitch,” Jason curses and in response Dick finally looks up from the box, to look at his brother's face.
Jason looks concerningly pale and his eyes are also fixated on the guns in front of them. A lump forms in Dicks throat and he wants nothing more than to just close the box again, tell Jason that must have misheard the riddle and find another way out. But there is no use. There is no denying of what is asked of them.
“Jason,” Dick mutters softly and waits for his brother's horrified gaze to move from the guns to him. And as he does, the sickness in Dicks stomach only increases because never in his life has he seen his brother look so horrified. All his instincts scream at him to pull him into a hug and brush through his hair but he doesn’t. It will only make everything worse. “There surely is another way…”
Though Dick says it so reassure Jason, he can tell that he is not really convincing him or himself in the slightest. There is no way of making any of this sound less terrible than it actually is - even if he'd try for Jason's sake.
“This is so sick,” Jason mutters as his eyes move back to guns and he shakes his head in disbelief. He’s staring at the guns like they’re venomous and Dick can very well share that sentiment.
As Dick drags his eyes away from the guns, he notices Jason's hands flexing on his side. For a second he is scared that the pit might take over his little brother and a terrifying moment later, he wishes for it to do so. For it to allow Jason to be so full of rage that he can pull the trigger on Dick without hesitation.
It scares Dick for a moment that he is so willing to die that no other possibility has crossed his mind, but he decides that, right now, he is glad about it. It simplifies this mess at least a tiny bit. Because if Dick would be terrified and unwilling to die right now, all of this would be much more complicated.
Jason's terrified, yet still mainly angry voice rips him out of his thoughts. “We’re not doing his little death-match theater. Screw that. Screw him.”
Dick’s mouth is dry. He swallows hard and tries to look anywhere else as at his brother. He should probably do the opposite - considering that, no matter what, this will be the last ten minutes he'll ever spend with him - but he simply can't. He can't look at his scared little brother, knowing that he can't fix this mess.
His fingers tighten on the edge of the table, nails biting into the cold metal, as he feels Jason’s eyes on him. He's probably waiting for him to say something. For him to come up with a plan that'll save the day but Dick knows that he doesn't have one to offer.
Not one that would guarantee both of their survivals at least. For Jason's survival he has a plan though.
“Hood…” Dick’s voice is a whisper as his throat tightening as he speaks. He resists the urge of saying Jay or Jason because no matter what, his brother will leave this room alive and then it won't be helpful if Riddlers knows his identity. That is, if he doesn't already does so anyways. “The room is filling with gas as we speak, we don't have much time.”
Jason barks out a bitter laugh in response, running a hand through his hair. “Yeah, thanks, Goldie. I noticed.” His tone is sharp but it's not really directed at Dick - no, it’s sharp because Jason is scared. And that fact alone lets Dicks chest tighten immediately. He'd give everything to take the fear away from his little brother.
“Then you know what he wants,” Dick mutters quietly and forces his eyes up to Jason again. He can't avoid his eyes forever and with how the situation is looking, he should spend his last remaining minutes looking at someone that he loves.
Jason’s head snaps up, glaring slightly at him. “Oh, I know what he wants, ‘Wing. He wants a show. He wants blood. But he’s not getting it.” He quickly shakes is head violently to underline his statement and probably get the image out of his head. “I’m not killing you.”
The tightness in his chest increases at that because even though he did expect that answer - and a part of him is glad about it - he wishes for something else. Something that would simplify any of this. “I’m not killing you either.”
They stare at each other across the table and - although Dicks hands are trembling and every shuttering breath is fight itself - he manages to remain that ‘this is not debateable’ look on his face. Jason’s hands flex again. His fists curling before uncurling, probably in an attempt to hide the tremor in them.
“Then we’re dead,” Jason mutters finally, and for a split second his voice is small. It doesn't sound like the Red Hood Jason that is standing in front of him but like the kid he once was. The kid that used to read in the manor’s library at night till he fell asleep. Dick sometimes even carried him to his room, if he happened to be around.
He inhales slowly, trying to organise his thoughts. The gas hissing above them is faint but insistent, soon it will fill the whole room leaving no fresh air to breath. They gotta do something as quick as possible. “No we're not.”
Jason’s eyes snap back to him, confusion overtaking his features for a moment. Mentally Dick prepares himself for the argument that is probably about to follow but he has run over every single possibility and there is no other way. His priority now is getting Jason out of here, no matter what.
“There is no way in hell I'm letting you die here,” Dick says firmly, leaving no room for debate. And without thinking about it he carefully reaches out and places a soft but still firm hand on Jasons shoulder. “Only one of us is dying here and that is going to be me.”
Jason only stares at him for a moment, seemingly startled at the finality in Dicks voice. Then his eyes start to glow in the faintest green and within seconds Jason pushes him away from him. “You gotta be kidding me.”
“I’m not arguing about this,” Dick exclaims as he catches himself before falling over. In an attempt to underline that statement he crosses his arms and resist the urge to hold himself up on the table. Jason is simply glaring at him.
“The hell you’re not.” By now Dick can see almost no more blue in his brother's eyes and he watches carefully as Jason opens and closes his fists repeatedly. “You think I’m gonna stand here and - what, put a bullet in your head? Do you think that’s heroic or something?!”
Dick flinches slightly but continues to stay his ground, putting his hands on the table and leaning over it a bit. “I'm not trying to be heroic, I'm just trying to protect you!”
Dick takes in a shuttering breath and finally returns his gaze to Jason. The words seem to have hit, since the younger one appears to be speechless for a moment. Dick forces in another breath before he continues to speak. “All I'm saying is that if one of us has to die, it’s going to be me.”
Jason stares at him like he’s lost his mind. For a second the green makes place for Jasons blue eyes before switching back to green, fury overruling whatever other emotion Jason is battling. “You — you can’t be serious.”
“I am.”
For a second Jason stares at him completely speechless before something flickers in his eyes and he slams his hand down on the table. “I don't need you try to protect me for fucks sake! I’m not your damn responsibility—”
“Yes you are!” Dick’s voice cracks slightly as he cuts Jason off. “You’re my brother. That’s all that matters.”
Jason’s mouth snaps shut and Dick pushes himself up a bit again to cross his arms. This is what it all comes down to in the end. He is the older brother. He is the one responsible for every single one of his siblings. He already failed Jason once, he can't allow himself to do that again. Not when he has a say in it this time.
Dick takes a shaky breath, lowering his voice again. “I would die for every single one of you. Tim, Steph, Damian… but for you? I’d do it without even thinking about it, Jay.” He presses his palms into the cold metal of the table, trying to ground himself.
And he means every single word he just said. He'd give his life for every one of his siblings in a heartbeat, no questions asked, but still, Jason is special. And deep down Dick knows exactly why. Because he already lost Jason once. He already went through grieving and mourning him once and he is certain that he wouldn't survive another time.
He watches carefully as Jason takes in every word. His eyes are widening and his hands are trembling softly. Dick takes a deep breath before speaking again, “So don’t try to argue. It’s already decided.”
Jason’s eyes are wide now, his mask being unable to hide the horror in them. For a second longer he simply stares at Dick, before the anger seems to take over. “You sound insane. Do you even hear yourself? That’s not some noble big brother crap. That’s—you’re talking like you want to die.”
Dick flinches again and quickly turns his head and eyes away from his brother. This isn’t a conversation he is ready to have right now and luckily by the looks of it, he won't have to now anyways.
Jason takes a step closer, his voice lower but increasingly more desperate now. “Wing, you’re not fixing anything by dying. And do you really think that I could aim a gun at you and pull the trigger? Kill you - my own brother - right here and now?!”
Dick swallows hard and he feels his chest ache. Of course he doesn't think that but there is no other choice. There is no other way of keeping his little brother safe and he can't allow himself to think of anything else. To think of the long lasting effects it would have on Jason's mental health to kill him. Right now the top priority is Jason's survival, he needs to focus on that.
“Of course not but it’ll keep you fucking alive.”
“I don’t care!” Jason explodes, slamming one hand down on the table again, the guns shaking slightly in the box. “I don’t care if I die again! I’ve done it once, remember? Been there, done that—got the pit madness to prove it. If one of us has to die here, it's me!”
The words hit Dick like ice water and a sickening and cold fear runs down his spine. His eyes meet Jason's without any hesitation and now it is his time to clench his fists. “No.”
“Why not? Hm?” Jason glares at him challenging. He turned the stakes and Dick wants to throw up at the mere thought. “What is so different between me and you dying?”
“Because you deserve to finally live your life more than anyone I know. Jay you came back from the dead. You fought your way back into life and I'm so proud of you. You were given a second chance at life, I'm not taking that away from you.” Dicks throat is dry and he feels his eyes stinginging. But still he can't help but feel a tiny bit of relief about finally saying all of this out loud. He is so beyond proud of his little brother and he couldn't stomach him dying again, and especially not by his own hands.
Dick would rather shoot himself in the head or get tortured for the rest of his life than even aim at his little brother.
He can see the tears building in Jasons eyes and immediately a wave of guilt washes over him for not saying any of this sooner. But before he can say anything else, Jason aggressively wipes the tears out of his eyes and glares at Dick.
Jason snarls. “Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare try to make all of this sound heroic Dick. I went against B's one golden rule and I killed so many fucking people. Me fighting myself back into life isn't as heroic as you make it out to be. I’m the one who’s screwed up. If someone’s going to die here, it’s me.”
That lets something snap inside of Dick. Never in his life does he ever want to hear that coming out of any of his siblings' mouths again. In his eyes Jason not only redeemed himself but also is acting reasonably considering what happend to him.
"That’s not how this works!” Dick’s voice cracks, the sound echoing against the walls as his glare on Jason increases. “You think I could live with that? With you dying again because of me?!”
Jason pauses for a moment, staring at Dick before he narrows his eyes. “And you think I could live with that?! Dick face it, I already died once, it doesn't matter.”
Dick wants to interfere, to shake sense into Jason that yes the fuck it does matter. That Dick lost everything the day he lost Jason. Not only because he lost his little brother, but because he lost him before he had any chance of showing the boy that he loved him. That yes he was hurt by Bruce and they had their fights but that it was never Jason's fault.
That when he finally got Jason back, he tried everything to make up for the awful older brother he was. That after all this time, Jason is what matters most to him. That he couldn't lose him again.
But before he can say any of this, Jason continues to speak. “But you Dick, you’re what's holding the family together. You're the one who calls us, who checks on us, who keeps B from burying himself in work. Fuck Dick, you’re the only person who always gave a damn about me. I— We can’t fucking lose you, don't you understand that?!”
Dick feels his heart slowly breaking into pieces and he swallows hardly. He just wants to wrap his arms around Jason at how broken his voice sounds but he can't. That would only make everything so much worse.
So instead he shakes his head and looks at his brother desperately. “And you think the family can deal with losing you again?! We already mourned you once, I doubt we could do that twice. I fucking couldn't Jay!”
He is well aware of the tears that are building in his eyes and the way his voice is breaking but he doesn’t mind it. There is no need to hide the vulnerability anymore.
Jason holds his gaze for a moment before looking away, looking like he is trying to collect himself. When he finally speaks again, his voice grows low. “I was gone for years, you survived.”
And that's the final straw for Dick. “I didn’t fucking survive Jay! I functioned, yes, but I didn't survive. It was a bloody horror show. After your death I hallucinated you Jason. You were following me around and bloody haunting me. Jay at some point I didn't even want to survive anymore!”
Dick feels the tears that had been building in his eyes finally fall and he quickly wipes over his face to stop them.
As he looks up he sees Jason staring at him, clearly taken aback from what he just said and his face is concerningly pale. As soon as Dick yelled out the words, he already regretted saying them. This is not something Jason should know or have to deal with.
He immediately moves his eyes away from Jasons again and takes a shuttering breath. Jason still stares at him, hands trembling and tears building in his eyes. “What— You—”
Dick takes a deep breath to calm himself down a little bit at least before he meets Jason's eyes again. “That doesn't matter now. What I'm trying to say is, I won't survive losing you another time Jay, I simply wouldn't.”
“I won't survive losing you too,” Jason whispers after a moment and for the second time today, Dick doesn’t see the grown up Jason in front of him but the kid he once was—and still is. The arguably sweetest and most joyful Robin. His little brother.
A sigh leaves his lips as he resists the urge to hug his brother tightly. They are going in a circle with this argument and they're running out of time and oxygen. Neither of them is willing to kill the other, that's safe to say, but Dick can't just let his baby brother die here.
And then it suddenly hits him. He remembers a very short but essentially part about the riddle.
“unless one stills a beating heart”
The riddle doesn't specify that one of them has to kill the other. In order for one of them to survive, someone needs to stop a beating heart. That doesn't mean that they have to stop the others heart, only a beating heart.
Dick almost smirks satisfied and relieved when he comes to that conclusion but given the circumstances, Jason would probably think that he now lost his mind completely if he does so. Maybe he wouldn't be wrong about that though…
For a moment there’s no sound but the hiss of the gas and both of their heavy breathing. Dick looks shortly at Jason who seems to be lost in thoughts as he stares at the wall behind Dick.
Dick closes his eyes one last time, forcing himself to focus and stay collected before he opens them again and reaches for the guns on the table.
Immediately Jason's eyes snap back to him and without meaning to do so, Dick freezes in his movement. Jason looks at him concerned and Dick prays that his little brother doesn't think that he just decided to shoot him and get it over with.
“What are you doing Dick?”
Another sigh leaves Dicks lips and he tries to steady his shoulders. “The riddle doesn't specify that one of us needs to kill the other,” he avoids Jason's gaze as he speaks, but he can see his eyes wide in the corner of his eyes. “It simply says that a beating hard needs to stop for the other to be free.”
Jason shakes his head, a horrified expression on his face as the realization of what Dick is about to do reveals itself to him. “No. No, you don’t get to—no. This isn’t—” He reaches out, gripping Dick’s forearm before he can grab one of the guns. His hand is warm even through the glove. “You’re not doing this. You hear me? You’re not.”
Dicks chest aches as he sees the tears finally falling from Jasons face. This is the most vulnerable and soft he has seen Jason since he came back from the dead. That simply adds another layer of guilt on his shoulders. “It’s the only way,” Dick says softly, trying to offer his him a gentle smile.
“No it’s not!” Jason’s grip tightens as the desperation in his voice becomes even more evident. “This—This can't be only way, you're out of your mind!”
Dick tries to gently but mainly firmly pull his arm free and once he finally manages to, he reaches for one of the guns. His hand is surprisingly steady but still a new wave of anxiety makes its way through his body.
Jason’s eyes go wide at the sight and his whole body posture is screaming pure panic. Dick wants to look away, to protect himself from seeing what he is doing to his brother, but that wouldn't be fair. “Dick—no—”
“Its okay little wing.” Dicks voice is suddenly extremely soft, soothing in a way he didn't think he could manage right now. Sadly but not surprisingly that doesn't seem to sooth Jason but rather increases the desperation and fear visible on his features.
Jason shakes his head violently in response but other than that it seems like he is frozen in shock. “No, no! I'm not letting you martyr yourself and I won't fucking walk out over your body! You don’t get to decide that. Not for me!”
It gives Dick physical pain to see Jason this desperate but he doesn’t give in. He will give in to everything if his siblings only ask long enough but not this time.
“This isn’t about deciding for you. It’s about protecting you.” His voice softens even more, trembling slightly as he tries to smile gently at Jason. “You’re my brother Jay. And if this is the only way I can keep you safe… then that’s what I’ll do.”
“I love you, Jay.” The words come out quiet, but loud enough for Jason to hear them. By now the younger one is actively crying and looking at Dick with such begging eyes that the older one feels sick for doing this. “You’re my baby brother and I am so proud of you.”
Jason actually stumbles back a step, shaking his head violently. “Don’t you—don’t you dare say goodbye to me like that—”
“I need you to be okay.” Dick’s voice is soft, he knows he is in no place to demand anything from Jason but still. See it as his last will or something. He carefully raises the gun and positions it against his temple. “I'm sorry Jason, I truly am and believe me I love you so so much.”
Jason seems to finally snap out of his state of shock and he hectically lunges towards him, knocking the table and the other gun aside in doing so. “Don’t! Dickie, please—”
Dick smiles at him sadly as he quickly sidesteps as Jason tries to get a hold of him. “It’s okay. It’s okay, I promise.”
He sees Jason’s face crumble even more as the full blown panic and terror set it. His hands try to clamp onto his wrists, trying to wrench the gun away, but just this time Dick is a few seconds faster than him, bringing distance between the two of them again.
“Please catch me, little wing.” With that he closes his eyes, not being able to look Jason in the eyes while doing it. He knows it's a selfish plea, that's is selfish to ask his little brother to catch him after he shoots himself in front of him. But he can't help it. He can't help the fear that holds him tight at the thought of his body falling after the fatal shot. It's a thought that makes him feel sick.
“Dick!” Jason’s voice breaks as he yells, the panic and desperation more clear than ever before. “Stop! Stop!”
In his mind, Dick mutters a soft goodbye to every member of his family. To Bruce in a silent plea to look after his siblings now. To Tim and Steph who he didn't tell how much he loved them enough. To Damian who's hair he'll now never get to run a hand through ever again. To his parents that he'll now finally get to embrace again. And lastly to Jason. His little wing. His first little brother. A silent beg for forgiveness.
Then he slowly pushes the trigger down.